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strangerthingfanfic · 2 years

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Chapters 2-4 (thank you for reading. Hope to update again in a week but with the holidays I'm not sure)

Chapter 2: Messages

Steve

Steve’s head ached. He still wasn't fully healed and now this. Life was just throwing stones at him.

He tried to get comfortable but the pain was terrible. He felt a hand on his neck.

Looking over he saw Dacre and he was slowly massaging his neck. He knew exactly what spots to hit and which to avoid.

He hummed a song Steve didn't recognize while he did it but it was relaxing.

“Joe loves this song so I thought it might relax you as well” Dacre said as a knock sounded at the door.

“Who is it ?” Dacre asked, obviously annoyed at the interruption.

“It's Sadie and the gang we wanted to check on Joe” was the reply from outside of the door.

Dacre told Steve he would send them off. Steve nodded and covered himself with the blanket.

Opening the door Dacre was ambushed by a group of teens who kinda just pushed their way in.

Gaten put some flowers on the desk next to Steve's side and said “Hey, it's Gaten, get better soon Joe we miss you”.

It took every inch of Steve's willpower not to throw the blanket off and give him a huge hug.

It happened with each one especially when it came to Sadie. She sounded so much like Max who was comatose in his world while he was stuck here and that made him heated than he had been.

People needed him. His “kids” needed him. He couldn't do it anymore. He knew his scars would give him away but fuck it.

Throwing off the blanket he startled everyone in the room, especially Dacre.

“Dacre, I know you wanted me to stay hidden but I couldn't. My name is Steve Harrington and I came from another world or some shit.

In my world Billy is dead and Max is in a coma. I need to get back to her. I'm the only parent-type figure she has” Steve said crying.

Silence. Then questions started flying in every direction from “has Joe gone mad?” to “tell us more about the other us”!

“Everyone settle down,” Dacre said with a demanding tone and the room became silent.

“Now if Steve is ok with it he can explain to us as much as he can and you have to listen with your ears because he hasn't gone insane he has just become lost,” Dacre said looking sadly at Steve but Steve knew he was seeing Joe not him.

Taking a deep breath Steve said “it's 1986 and I just watched a good friend die, Max is in the hospital in a coma, her mom is around physically but that is all, while her stepdad took off after Billy was killed by a mind flayer”.

Steve stopped there and looked at both Dacre and Sadie. Dacre was unreadable while Sadie was figuring it all out in her head.

Steve didn't know what to say so he continued “Lucas hasn't left Max’s side and if it wasn't for Jane and her powers Max would be dead.

Will is becoming more and more secluded due to his unreturned feelings for a very clueless Mike.

Dustin is just trying to get over our friend Eddie's death by killer bats in the upside down and that's where this story starts.

I was going to comfort Dustin but I passed out. I thought maybe it was venom from the bats but after hearing Joe passed out too I don't think it's that.

I believe that Vecna wanted to separate us to weaken the group.

With Joe there, an actor who knows nothing about the world or the upside down the team will have to switch their focus to him.

Hopefully, something or someone will figure this shit out fast because I think with me here vecna may be able to open a gate to the upside down in your realm”.

The silence returned.

The tv in the room switched on and everyone jumped. Then they saw that the remote was up by the tv and no one had turned it on causing their confusion to become fear.

There was a news story playing. “Investigators found a badly destroyed body after this scene played out this morning”.

They switched to footage of a teen girl floating in the air and her body breaking and bending limb by limb until she fell.

And then the tv switched off.

“He's here. He's fucking here Steve said as he started to get out of bed.

Dacre pushed him back down and looking at him with the a same piercing blue eyes that Billy would stare him down with didn't have to say a word for Steve to lay down again.

“For now we need to think. We need to plan. We need to stick together. None of this leaves this room. Since it's not all over social media this was a warning. A threat and we cannot let whomever this Vecna guy is break us down.

We will get Joe back and we will stop psychotic evil forces from killing everyone but first Steve has to rest” Dacre said with passion.

And with that, he walked the others to their hotel rooms and the came back to his. Steve had his legs pulled to his chest.

“Maybe just maybe if I had noticed the pain Billy was going through at home he would've been a helpful addition” Steve whimpered as he buried his face between his knees.

Dacre didn't say a word but wrapped his arms around him. This was a time for resting not self-blame so he would ask later about more details.

Before either noticed they were both asleep embraced in each other's arms.

Chapter 3: Real

The whispering around him woke Joe up but he didn't let anyone know he was awake. He honestly didn't remember falling asleep.

He heard them wondering what to do and if they should really believe him.

“It could be poisoning from the bats” he heard a man say.

“That's impossible Wayne he has no bruising or anything on him. That's not Dingus” said a female voice.

“Yeah Wayne when are you going to let us in on how you know about all this” another female voice chimed in.

Slow steady breathing and then the man who must be Wayne said “I moved here long ago to study the upside down. I had read many myths about Hawkins and its shadowed vale so I had to prove it.

When I heard about Eddie's death and what happened to Max all my theories were proven.

All we can hope now is that it's not too late to stop Vecna and save Max and all of Hawkins” Wayne said.

Joe decided he had heard enough and sat up. Everyone looked at him.

“I'm really in Hawkins aren't I” Joe murmured finally accepting the truth.

“Yes you are but we are going to get you home don't worry,” Wayne said trying to keep he relaxed.

“Can I ask something?” Joe asked softly, fearing the answer. Wayne nodded and Joe asked, “where is Billy”?

The room fell silent and Joe got his answer. “Is he buried close by?” Joe said starting to stand up.

Nancy responded first “I will take you” she said and got up as well.

Jonathan got up as well and the three of them headed out the door.

The drive to the cemetery was quiet and seemed to take forever.

Joe stared absently out the window at the mostly destroyed Hawkins.

When they pulled up to the cemetery his chest knotted up and it hurt to breathe. He didn't truly understand why but it was happening so he couldn't do much about it.

Getting out of the car Joe didn't need a tour guide to find the grave. He let his heart guide him.

When he got to the grave he collapsed to his knees. The tears started to flow and he put his hand on the cold headstone.

Between grief for a loss he never suffered and anger for the lack of love and caring on the tombstone for a man he never knew, Joe just wanted to scream.

After a while, Joe got up, looked around and headed to the patch of flowers growing on the edge of the cemetery.

Nancy held Jonathan's hand as they watched the man so dearly in pain and mourning and even though they didn't understand they kept silent.

Picking some flowers he took them back to Billy's grave and set them by the grotesque headstone.

“I will not let your grave be as cold as the hearts that buried you here,” Joe said as he placed them.

He placed his hand one last time on the headstone and walked back to the car and silently got in.

The drive back to Nancy's house was silent but tense. Both Nancy and Jonathan could feel the anger and hurt emanating from Joe.

When they returned Joe silently followed Nancy and Jonathan in and sat on the couch refusing to make eye contact with anyone in the room.

After an hour of complete silence, Joe finally said “I don't care what kind of person Billy was, he was a young man who was abused his whole life and was trying to survive on autopilot. He didn't know any better. I somehow have Steve’s memories of Billy and yes he was a jerk but I am guessing we have all been assholes in our lifetime. No one, even Billy Hargrove deserves such a cold and heartless run-of-the-mill headstone and no flowers at that. Seriously even in death, no one in this damn town could show him he was worth love.

I really don't understand how I know all this about Billy but I know it's true. I know in my heart that it's true and I'm in so much pain”.

No one said a word. Guilt plagued their minds.

“Can I see Max?” Joe asked with venom dripping in every word. He knew he was scaring Dustin and the others but he couldn't help it. The pain was real.

Wayne offered to take him and this time Dustin jumped up to go too. He ran over and took Joe's hand which he had to admit calmed him down a bit.

The trip to the hospital consisted of Wayne and Dustin sharing memories of their friend Eddie. Joe knew they experienced loss that was much more real than his but it felt real and at that point, that's all that mattered.

When they reached the hospital they went in and Wayne showed them to Max’s room.

Again, the knotting in his chest, the loss of breath, and the flowing of tears overcame Joe.

He didn't know why he felt these things but he did. It was real. The pain and the tears were all real.

He went over and took Max's hand ignoring the stares from around the room and held it.

“I'm so sorry I couldn't save you, Max. We will figure out how to bring you home” Joe said, squeezing her hand.

The others quietly found a place to sit and they all just prayed for Max and her safe return home.

Chapter 4: Return

It wasn't an exit. Eddie groaned and said “this must be the veil bridge. If we cross it we should get an exit”. Billy just sighed not understanding a word his travel partner had said.

The veil though was nothing neither Eddie nor Billy wasn't ready for after their time in the Upside Down.

Eddie let Billy lead the way. Billy did so without hesitation. He had to get to Max. He had to make sure she was ok.

He had heard her voice and then her screaming. Why was she in this hellish place Munson kept referring to as the Upside Down? What did this doucebag Vecna want with her that Eddie told him about? If Max was hurt in any way Billy was going to kick this Vecna's ass on his own.

Billy wasn't the greatest big brother but he loved Max more than anyone else, most of the time more than himself.

Suddenly an ugly ass bat flew toward Eddie and Billy smashed it with a bat he was carrying. Would've been a home run if he was playing ball.

“Thanks. Those things are what kept me here” Eddie said softly.

Billy just motioned for them to continue. He knew the story. He heard whispers about the savior who made sure others got out at the risk of his own life. He would never be loved like Munson but he didn't care anymore.

They kept walking for what could've been hours, days, months before Billy said they should stop and rest.

They had fought through bats, ugly ass dogs, and more and they were both tired as shit.

“You're nothing like Steve or Max explained to me,'' Eddie said, laying flat on his back and looking up at the void.

“Haha yeah Harrington hates my ass and well Max has every right to curse my name. She is probably glad I'm dead. Oh yeah, she is. I heard her speech” Billy said laying down next to Eddie.

Eddie looked over and noticed Billy was crying. He acted strong but the thought of Max wanting him dead was breaking him.

“That sister of yours is a spitfire. She ran head-first into danger just like you do. She has a way with not-so-flattering words like you do. She also gives more of a shit than she lets on like you do.

Whatever shit ass thing you heard down there, you cannot trust. Vecna only allows what he wants to be heard.

Maybe at first, she wanted you dead, and was glad you were dead, but it didn't stay that way. It was a pain she kept hidden. It will all work out Billy you'll see” Eddie said trying to help Billy relax.

“Hey, thanks. Most people just write me off” Billy said.

Eddie grinned to himself and said, “I know how it is but when you meet the right people shit just falls into place you will see”.

Billy hoped he was right.

After a bit more rest Billy and Eddie once again started the trek to the end of the bridge.

They finally made it and were exasperated when they saw where they were.

A grave. It was a goddamn grave. They didn't know whose it was but at the moment neither one cared.

Eddie being claustrophobic didn't help matters much.

“Relax Munson, I have an idea. I will push you up through the dirt and then you can lift me out before it rains dirt on me” Billy said.

Before Eddie could say anything, Billy placed his hands on Eddie's sides. “Nice abs there Eddie,” Billy said happily at the red that spread over Eddie's face.

“One, Two, and three” Billy called out and using Eddie as a human drill pushed him up as hard as he could.

After a few grunts and another hard push, Eddie broke ground and then brought Billy up with him.

They both laid on the ground and panted. “Good workout” Billy proclaimed, causing both men too laugh.

Looking at the gravestone they saw Billy's name. “We are definitely in Hawkins,” Billy said, trying not to take offense to his parent's cheapness and laziness though he did wonder who the flowers were from.

Dusting themselves off Eddie led Billy to something he never thought he would see again, his blue Camaro.

“How the hell did you savage this,” Billy said looking it over.

“It helps when you have an uncle who's great with cars,” Eddie said proudly of Wayne.

Eddie was shocked when Billy wrapped his arms around him and cried. “I'm so thankful to you both. You're probably the first person to give a damn” Billy said through the tears.

Eddie rubbed his back and let Billy get the tears out he was taught never to cry.

After a few minutes, they were on the way to the hospital, the last place Eddie placed her while in the veil

Being behind the wheel of the Camaro again, Billy finally started to feel as though things might start going his way.

Both men couldn't believe what Hawkins looked like. “What the hell happened” Eddie exclaimed as they continued on.

“Fuck if I know but we will find out” Billy said turning onto the hospital parking lot.

Both men hurried in and after getting Max's room number they headed upstairs.

Billy took a deep breath, stood in the doorway, and said with flair “Hey Harrington, what the hell happened to my sister”?

#stranger things #billy hargrove #fanfic #max mayfield #dacre montgomery #steve harrington #ao3 fanfic #ao3 tags #steddie #eddie munson #billy deserved better #fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #joe keery

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thefrontofmymind · 2 years

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#ik this is shallow #but i've gotten so many notifs today :))#bc i'm no longer shadowbanned :))#it feels so good!!#jorj rambles #(btw i'm totally gonna repost eddie friends to lovers later bc i deleted it when i got shadowbanned)#and also i have that other eddie wip to finish and post probably tomorrow #and then stepdad!joe which will happen when it happens

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14buddy22 · 2 years

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Father's Day

Aaron Hotchner x Single Mom!Reader

Part 7!

WC: 5234

Series Masterlist // Masterlist

Everything was just right. You had gotten your pictures back from the photoshoot of your family. You wanted to surprise Aaron with the picture of him, Haley and Jack for Father’s Day. The photographer did a beautiful job editing her into it. You were going to surprise him for Father’s Day, but you also were working on another surprise for Aaron. You were getting ready to talk to your kids about how they would feel if Aaron could adopt them.

“Joey, Tyler, Grace, I want to talk to you while Aaron and Jack are out.”

They climbed up next to you on the porch swing. They snuggled into you and you kissed your 3 kids on the forehead.

“So, Father’s Day is coming up. This is the first father’s day we’re going to celebrate with Aaron. I was thinking that because Aaron and I are getting married in a couple weeks and because Grace already calls Aaron, Dad. How would you boys feel if Aaron adopted you? You still don’t have to call him dad, but if something were to happen to me, Aaron would raise you and take care of you so you three don’t have to be split up.”

Tyler said, “That’d be so cool! He’d be our Dad! Jack’d be our brother!”

Grace was on board already, she was babbling about her dad. She loved Aaron, their bond was so strong, everything you hoped for in their relationship. You imagined her sneaking in past curfew, her first boyfriend, first break up - Aaron being her go-to person. You know Grace would love it.

Tyler, well he wasn’t calling him Dad yet but he was getting excited that Aaron would become his legal guardian. You think he was holding back on calling Aaron “dad” because Joey wasn’t calling him Dad yet and he was there when Joey lashed out on Grace for calling him Dad.

Joey said, “I’ve been thinking about it Mom and I think I’d really like for Aaron to become my legal guardian. He’s going to become our stepdad soon, and I love Aaron like I loved Dad. I don’t know if I’m ready to call him Dad yet, but I’m ready for him to become my legal guardian. If something were to happen to you, I’d want Aaron to raise me.”

That brought tears to your eyes. You knew Joey had always had an internal struggle with choosing to be close with Aaron. That’s why it took so long for them to find something he had in common. Joey had talked to you about an interest in Aaron’s job but you weren’t wanting him to get that close to the job. You just weren’t ready to have Joey become interested in a job where Michael and Haley died. The job in which the bad guys had won.

“Joe. I’m very proud of you. You know that, right? You’ve really stepped up to being a big brother to Jack, you’ve found something in common with Aaron. I know it’s not something that’s the best, but it’s something unique to you honey. Just as Tyler goes golfing with him and Grace, well Grace just likes being around him in general.”

“He also coaches me. That’s something too.”

“That is, baby.”

You were so proud of your son, he was choosing to start seeing the good in this. You know Aaron would be proud of him too. Aaron always felt hesitant due to the fact that Joey had once told him that he never would be his father. That day still broke your heart, how you handled the situation is something you’ll never forget and you’ll regret no matter what. But, this was your son, your son who was old enough to know who his father was, at least for now, until the memory of Michael started to fade away and all Joey would only remember very little about him since he was so young.

“We can’t tell Aaron about this, okay? Not until Father's day.”

Joey said, “How are we going to tell him?”

“I want to let you decide. I think you’ll come up with something special in your own way. Would you like to come up with an idea?”

“Yeah.”

“Hey Mom, Joey?”

Joey looked at your youngest son and said, “What’s up, Tyler?”

“Can I call Aaron, Dad?”

You didn’t know how Joey was going to react. Joey and your son were close, but Tyler was also the closest to Aaron between your two boys. Maybe it was because Jack and Tyler were only a few months apart. But, then the reaction from your son made your heart melt.

“Of course you can Tyler, he is our Dad. I just don’t want to call him Dad yet, but I will soon.”

Joey and Tyler hugged and then Grace said, “Daddy!”

She saw Aaron moving around in the kitchen and then Jack came running outside. Joey! Tyler! Grace! Do you want to go swimming?”

Tyler said, “Yeah!”

The kids all went inside and you followed. Aaron was putting groceries away and said, “Hey honey!”

“Hi! How was your afternoon with Jack?”

“It was nice. We had a good time.”

Joey, Gracie, and Jack had gone outside and Tyler was standing by you. Aaron was looking at a shopping list and he said, “I forgot BBQ sauce, damn it. But that’s okay, because I’ll go tomorrow after work.”

“Hey, dad?”

Aaron looked at Tyler and he said, “What’s up, buddy?”

Tyler said, “Are you going to come in the pool with us?”

“Yeah buddy. I am. Come here.”

He looked at you then picked your son up. You didn’t realize Tyler would call him Dad so quickly, but you were happy he did and Aaron was happy. He may have been caught off guard but recovered when he saw Tyler was a little hesitant to call him that.

Your son was rubbing his thumb and forefinger together, something that your youngest two picked up on when they saw Aaron do it. It was cute, really, the little things that they’d pick up on. Even all your kids including Jack had the Hotchner glare.

“Is it okay if I call you Dad? Because I really want to because you’re marrying mommy and you do Dad things for me. You take me golfing, you make me breakfast and pack my lunches for school, you coach Jack and I’s soccer team.”

“Yes, of course it’s okay. I’d be very happy if you called me Dad, I just didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”

Aaron kised Tyler’s forehead and Tyler said, “Mom, will you go swimming with us?”

“Yeah, let me talk to Dad and then we’ll get our swim suits on.”

“Love you mom, love you Dad.”

“We love you too.”

Your son ran out and you walked over to Aaron. Aaron was in disbelief, you could profile it even if you weren’t a profiler.

“Talk to me.”

“He wants to call me dad.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“It’s not so much about how I feel, it’s about how Joey feels. I know Joey doesn’t see me as his father, and I guess that’s okay, it hurts. It does hurt, you know. I’d put my whole life on the line for him, for all our kids and you. I know he’s only 8, I get that, but sometimes it hurts knowing that your best is not good enough.”

Your heart broke for Aaron and yourself. Joey was your son, Aaron was your soon to be husband. You know he was doing his best. Always trying his hardest to get your children to like him. Your children loved him, but what hurt you was knowing that he felt like that. You wish he’d told you sooner. All this doubt that was built in him, you know he struggled with it and him trying to be a father to your kids was making it worse.

If only Aaron knew what the kids were okay with doing, asking him to adopt all three AND they wanted to come up with a way of surprising them, Joey letting Tyler call Aaron dad without any backlash. It was a big step for Joey. You’d say even bigger than the one he took when Grace called Aaron “dad”.

“Honey, Joey was okay with Tyler calling you Dad, we just had a conversation talking about it. We’re okay. Joey’s okay with it. I’m sorry you feel like this, I’m trying the best I can, but Aaron come on, you’re an FBI agent, you know about trauma more than anyone, you know kids struggle in a new relationship when they had a parent that passed. You know what, I try to remember everything about that morning to what the kids had for breakfast after we left that bed but some things I can’t remember. But there’s gotta be something that’s eating Joey up. I know it.”

In the middle of the night, you jolted awake. You were having such a realistic dream. Michael had come to you, he’d been trying to tell you something but it just wasn’t clear enough for you, yet it somehow triggered a memory for you. You now know why Joey was having such a hard time with Aaron.

Aaron had sat up with you and turned on a lamp. He didn’t exactly know what was going on. All he knew was that you jolted awake, out of his arms, at 2:38 in the morning. What the hell was going on?

“Aar, I remember that morning. I remember Michael had woken me up early. I had asked if something was wrong with the kids but nothing was wrong, he was taking Joey hiking. It’s something that they’d done since Joey was young. Joey and Michael went hiking that morning. Joey spent the last few hours of Michael’s life with him, doing what they loved. Oh my god, I’m a shitty mother. In two years, I hadn’t asked Joey about anything. He never even mentioned it.”

You were having a breakdown in the middle of the night. Like a full blown breakdown, how could you be such a shitty mother. Your son needed you and you were over here falling in love with a man. You should’ve been a better mother. What the fuck were you thinking? Planning to marry a man, putting yourself first before your children. You couldn’t do this not to Aaron and Jack. They deserved everything. Aaron deserved everything.

You immediately got out of bed and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you, and you began to cry harder. You heard a knock on the door but you didn’t know what had made you this upset. The fact that you had to break up with Aaron, break off the engagement, break up this family, because you’re a shitty mother?

“Hey honey, can I come in?”

You wiped your tears and Aaron came in. He looked at you and then he made his way to come sit on the floor with you. His back would hurt in the morning, but he wanted to be with you, he needed to be with you. He pulled you in between his legs and pulled you in close.

“Aaron, I-I don’t know if I could do this anymore.”

Aaron’s body tensed at your words. What the hell just came out of your mouth. That’s all he wanted to know. Were you serious? He was ready to spend the rest of his life with you. Were you really throwing it all away because of some dream?

“No, I can’t accept that. I won’t accept that. You’re my fiance, you and I AND the kids have all come so far for this family. I understand things are tough. Father’s day is coming up, it’s the 2nd father’s day without Michael. It’s getting tough, I’m not saying it’s not hard without Haley. I know you’re struggling because the day Michael died, your whole world stopped, you’re slowly putting the pieces back together. But, Jack and I are the pieces that are helping you put it together, if you lose us, it’s going to take even longer to fix yourself. I’m sure there’s someone better out there for you because you’re you. But for Jack and I, there is no one better for us. You’re perfect for me. The kids are perfect siblings for Jack. The kids are the perfect addition to my children. We’re a family and we have to stick it through.”

Aaron wiped your tears from your cheeks and you looked at him. You truly were lucky. Of course Aaron thought there was someone better for you than him. But that wasn’t true. You were just emotional because of how hard you were on yourself and now you’re realizing that you’re a shitty mother.

“And no, Y/N, you’re not a terrible mother. It’s been hard, I understand that honey. Let me help you through it though so you’re not always crying at 3am in the morning.”

3am? How had it already been a half hour since you were in the bathroom? Aaron’s alarm goes off at 5am for work, but he’s usually up at 4:30am to go for a run before his alarm even goes off. Now you were probably ruining your day. All this self doubt is ruining you for the best.

“I’m sorry Aaron, I guess with father’s day coming up, it’s just been an internal struggle with myself because I lost Michael, you’re here and you’re a great father to Joey, Tyler, Jack, and Grace. But as a mother, I feel like I’m the worst mother ever. I’ve pushed Joey off to the side instead of listening to him.”

“No, you are. You are listening to him. Joey just doesn’t open up, you and I both know that. I haven’t been hiking in a while, but maybe on father’s day I can take Joey. Just him and I.”

“That’s not much of a father’s day with you. You should be spending one on one time with Jack, that’s your son.”

“While your kids may not be my biological kids, they are my kids. Joey’s caught on to my Hotchner glare, so has Gracie. Tyler rubs his thumb and forefinger together when he gets nervous or he’s thinking. He’s picked up on things that I do. They’re just as much “my” kids even if they don’t have the same DNA as me, but that doesn’t matter to me.”

You leaned into Aaron. This was why he was so good at being a Unit Chief, he talks people off the ledge. He’s an amazing father and an even better soon to be husband. You were very lucky.

You stood up and pulled him up. You pulled him into a kiss and then hugged him. He held you tighter and you two stood like that for a while. Just two lovers, two lovers who began this relationship as single parents, falling in love harder and harder every day.

“Thank you for that. I really needed someone to talk me off the ledge.”

“You’re a great mother, honey. Don’t you ever forget that, and if you do, just come find me and I’ll tell you what a great mother you are.”

“Thank you for that.”

“Now, let’s get back to bed, we’ll make the kids breakfast in the morning.”

Within a few days, you were prepping the kids for father’s day. After the other night at 3am, crying in your bathroom, you realized that your fiance was the best thing to happen to you. You decided that while Aaron was at work, you were going to do father’s day crafts with the kids. You’d gotten the adoption papers and had put them in a file.

You haven’t gotten around to asking Joey about that morning, but Aaron was. Aaron was going to suggest that Joey and him go hiking at one of Michael’s favorite places. It’ll be a good thing for Joey to remember Michael and celebrate him while also getting some one on one time with Aaron on father’s day.

Saturday night rolled around and you were watching TV with Aaron and Joey. The others were in bed and it was just about time for Joey to head to bed. You looked over at Aaron. You knew what he was going to ask. You just didn’t want your son to be overwhelmed.

Aaron looked at your son and said, “Hey Joey, is there anything special you want to do for Father’s day tomorrow?”

“Not really, Aaron. Just stay at home and swim maybe. Did you have anything planned?”

“You know, I saw some pictures of you and your Dad when you were younger and it seemed like you two liked to go hiking. I was thinking that maybe you and I could get up early tomorrow and go hiking at one of your Dad’s favorite trails?”

Joey looked at you then looked at Aaron. “You would do that for me?”

“Yeah, of course I would. What do you say? We don’t have to, I just thought.”

Joey moved away from you and into Aaron’s arms. He held onto Aaron and Aaron was shocked. Out of all the reactions, this is the one he least expected. He held Joey in his arms. This was as good as the time they talked about Grace calling him Dad. Maybe this was a breakthrough that Joey needed. Maybe you were a good mom. Talking to Aaron about it and Aaron taking it a step farther. Taking your son hiking on Father’s day. Aaron and Joey oculd bond more and Joey could miss his father while doing something to remember him.

When Sunday morning rolled around, you heard Aaron getting dressed. He sat on your bedside and kissed the top of your forehead. You woke up to him. This was his first father’s day with your kids. Hopefully by the time next father’s day rolled around, he’d be celebrating his first father’s day with a child that is half yours and half his, but only time would tell.

“Happy father’s day, Aaron.”

You kissed him again and pulled him on top of you. This is how you spent father’s day with Michael, but this father’s day was going to be different. Aaron didn’t know it yet but this was going to be a father’s day for him to remember, if he didn’t get freaked out. He moaned into the kiss and you heard a knock at your door.

Aaron got off you and smiled. “It was fun while it lasted.” You chuckled and you sat up. Aaron made his way to the door and opened it. Joey was standing there with his backpack and he said, “Good morning, Aaron! Good morning, Mom! Happy Father's day, Aaron!” He hugged Aaron and came to sit on your bed.

“Are you ready to go on your hike with Aaron?”

“Yeah, I’m excited! I slept so well, but look! I packed my own backpack this morning.”

Aaron sat on the edge of the bed next to Joey and Joey dumped out his bag. Candy and junk food fell out of his bag along with a sweatshirt and an extra pair of gym shoes and a small towel.

“You are ready to go little man.”

They grabbed their backpacks and you packed Aaron’s backpack with a little more sustainable food for him and Joey.

“Okay, get with Aaron for a picture.” Joey put his arm around Aaron and they both smiled.

“Alright, you boys go, have fun, enjoy your hike. When you come back, breakfast will be ready and the other 3 will be up. Then we’ll go swimming and Uncle Sonny is coming over with Amanda, Jesse and Bille.”

“Okay mom. I love you.”

“I love you too. Have fun with Aaron.”

Aaron kissed you and you watched them leave. You decided to start cleaning around the house, make a grocery list for next week, do some laundry, and if you were lucky you’d clean the pool. Something to keep your nerves calmed before your kids were going to ask Aaron to adopt them.

Aaron and Joey had gotten to the trail and began their hike. Aaron was excited, he had talked about it non-stop with you last night and before he had asked Joey. Maybe he was excited because it was finally something that he and Joey could bond over. Aaron always got excited when Tyler asked him to golf.

Aaron and Joey had been hiking and made it to a spot to watch the sunrise. They stopped to have a snack and sat on a rock.

“Hey Aaron?”

“What’s up, Joe?”

“Thanks for taking me hiking today. It means a lot. I miss my Dad all the time, and I love you. You’ve been a great Dad to me. You know, that morning, Dad took me hiking, and that was the last one on one time I had with him before he died.”

Joey had leaned into Aaron and Joey whispered, “I miss him, Aaron.”

Aaron held onto him. Aaron knew Joey needed this right now. If Joey never called Aaron “dad”, that didn’t matter to him anymore, he and Joey were always going to have this moment now. Aaron felt like in the relationship he had built with Joey, this was the first meaningful thing they had with each other. Well, the first BIG meaningful thing, Joey had opened up to Aaron, and on father’s day on top of it.

You had gotten an update from Aaron that things had been going well. They were hiking back and would be home within the next hour.

“Aaron,

Happy Father's Day. Thank you for being the best father to our 4 children. Jack is so lucky to have you as a dad as well as Joey, Tyler, and Gracie. You’re a bonus dad to them and I couldn’t be any more luckier. When Michael passed, I thought I’d never find love again. I was a single mom who was worried that some guy wouldn’t love me because I had three young children, but I think my kids made you love me even more. Seeing you interact with my children, our children is my favorite thing in the world. Everyone can see how you’re such a great dad. Even if you’re not Joey, Tyler, and Gracie’s biological dad, it seems like it to the outside world. I love you Aaron Hotchner. Even though you doubt it, you’re a great dad. I see that every time you’re around our kids. When you fed Gracie for the first time, you weren’t weirded out that she was clinging on to a weird man who she’d only known for a little bit. But that was a bond that began and it’s only grown so much from there, to you taking naps with her to you coming home after a long week and dressing up in a crown and drinking tea. Thank you for being there for Tyler. Your bond with Tyler is strong. For Tyler, you go golfing with him. It started when he showed interest in the Masters, you were patient with him, hitting flight restricted golf balls in our front yard, taking him to the range, to just completing his first 18 round course in Florida. For Joey, thank you for being so patient with him. While it may sometimes seem that Joey doesn’t care about you or is mad at you, he’s not. I think he’s just mad at the world for taking Michael away. I don’t blame him. He was 6 years old when his Dad died and then less than a year later, we met you and Jack. But, don’t fear, your bond with Joey is growing strong, even Joey mentioned how much he loves you. Taking him hiking and remembering Michael is something I think Joey will remember for the rest of his life, oh and of course taking him to that fancy restaurant in Flordia where you both wore dress pants and dress shirts. And Jack, your biological son. Your baby boy. He will always be your baby boy Aaron. I know your relationship with Jack is much different than the ones you have with childrena and that’s OK. I would never ask you to change that because while it may be different, I know the amount of love for the 4 kids is all the same, and I thank you for that.

Thank you for being the best dad to my three kids and your son.

Maybe next father’s day you’ll have another kid running around. Half me and half you. What do you say, Hotchner?

Love,

Future Mrs. Hotchner

You weren’t going to lie, that was really the first heartfelt message you had written out since Michael had passed. You wrote Aaron a nice birthday card, but this one was more, you had talked about your children and maybe the fact that you hinted at making another baby. One that would be the perfect mix of you and Aaron.

You put the card on the table at his chair and got dressed for the day. The three kids had woken up and you helped them get dressed. They got their crafts ready for Aaron and you had put a card on the table for him. You wrote the card after he had gone to bed last night. It made you tear up so you figured that he would maybe tear up.

Aaron and Joey walked through the door and the kids all yelled, “HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!”

Aaron knelt to the ground and all three kiddos ran to him and hugged him. He kissed all of them and Jack held onto him. Aaron stood up and carried Jack and Gracie over to the table. He put them in their chairs and walked over to you.

“Happy father’s day, Aaron.”

He kissed you and whispered, “Things went really well with Joey, I’m glad we went.”

You hugged him and the kids all sat down.

“Dad! Dad! Open presents!”

Aaron sat down and he looked at all the crafts the kids had made for them. He opened up a gift bag that had a new tie in it from all the kids.

“Thank you, I love each and every one of my pictures, crafts, and my new tie! I’ll be wearing it to work tomorrow.”

He had smiled and kissed each and every one of them. You grabbed your picture that the photographer had photoshopped and you brought it over.

You set up your phone to record and you wiped your tear.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

“Well, I know as a father, you’ve had your doubts, but I know you’re doing the best you can, keeping your promise you made to Haley. I know how much you cherish the picture of Haley and Jack and you. It was one of the last family pictures you had and I wanted to do something for you and for Jack.”

Jack climbed on Aaron’s lap and you gave them another gift. Jack unwrapped it and Aaron immediately began to cry. Not a bad cry, but one that you heard when he was upset. One time on a case, he blamed himself after a case had gone badly, a little 5 year old girl was killed, Aaron had been right outside the house.

Jack had yelled, “Daddy! It’s momma! Look!”

It was the picture of Aaron and Jack and Haley had been photoshopped into it. Aaron wiped his tears and he pulled the picture out to look at it more. You had wiped your tears and your kids all went to hug him.

He stood up and walked over to you. He kissed you and immediately engulfed you into a big Hotchner hug. Being in his arms was completely different.

“Thank you so much. I absolutely love it. So does Jack. You don’t know how much that means to me.”

He kissed the top of your head and then you wiped his tears and your tears.

Later on in the evening, your brother, his girlfriend and her kids were all over and everyone was having a nice night.

Tyler said, “Hey Dad?”

“Yeah buddy?”

Joey walked over to Aaron along with Tyler.

Joey said, “Aaron, you’ve been very important to us these past 2 years and you’ve been really good to my mom. We couldn’t be more thankful for you, especially after our Dad died.”

Gracie climbed into his lap and you looked at your kids. Your brother had looked at you and then back at Aaron and the kids.

Joey said, “You’re good to my sister, to my brother, and to me. I love you, dad.”

Your heart stilled. You didn’t expect Joey to say those words. He hadn’t even talked to you about it, he did it on his own. You were so proud of your son. So proud of the kid he was.

Aaron said, “Thank you for being the best kids in the world. I love you all.” He hugged Joey and Joey said, “Wait, Dad, we want to know something.”

“What’s that?”

“Dad, will you adopt us?”

Joey and Tyler held out adoption papers and Aaron blinked back tears. For a unit chief, these surprises caught him off guard. It caught you off guard. You didn’t know how they were going to ask, if they were going to go through with it, but they did and you were so proud of them.

“Yes, yes, of course I’ll adopt you three.”

Aaron kissed Gracie and Dominick took her from his lap. He leaned in his chair and pulled your two sons in for a hug. Tyler wiggled his way out while saying “Dad, you’re squishing me.”

“Sorry bud.”

Joey held onto Aaron and whispered, “Thanks for being the best Dad to me after my Dad died. Thank you for loving me even when I’m mad at you.”

“I love you so much Joey. Don’t you ever forget that. No matter what you could say or do to me, I’ll always love you.”

Sitting in bed that night, Aaron made his way to you after changing. He held the card out and he said, “Thank you for being the best fiance I could ask for, the best mother to our children, for loving Jack and I. Everything that you did for me today will go down in history as the best father’s day ever.”

“I didn’t know Joey would call you Dad today.”

Aaron laid in between your legs and rested his head on his stomach. He was such a softee, always needing to be touching you, he wasn’t overly clingy, but you understood why, everything could be taken from him in a blink of an eye, and it did and he would never let it happen again.

“So, you do want another little one running around by next father’s day?”

“I do, do you?”

“With you, absolutely. You’ve made 3 beautiful children already, so what the hell, let’s make a 5th. One half me, and one half you.”

“Let’s get started then, huh?”

You had pulled Aaron up to kiss you and he put his hand underneath your shirt. This was going to be a long night.

“Thanks for giving me the best Father’s Day I could’ve ever asked for.”

Next Part

#aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner #jack hotchner #aaron hotchner x single mom!reader

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navalcriminalimagines · 4 years

Text

“Hi ma’am. Uh—I’m looking for Jethro Gibbs?” The 15 years old boy asked to Ellie Bishop. Who’s that kid? She’s never seen him before, or heard her boss talked about a teenager. And she doesn’t recall how it could be link to any case.

“You are?” She asked, intrigued.

“It’s—personal,” the teenager said. Now, she’s even more intrigued. If he had blue eyes, she’d have asked herself if he shared DNA with her boss.

“I’m gonna call him but I just need your name,” she said, grabbing her phone.

“Harry! What are you doing here, bud?” Gibbs approached the teenager and Harry immediately ran into his arms. Gibbs hugged him tight.

“Can I stay with you today?”

“I—“ Gibbs wanted to tell him that he was working. But he was the sad eyes on Harry’s face. The kid has been though a lot lately, he can’t tell him no. “Let him call your mum, okay?”

Gibbs stood aside the bullpen while he called you, Harry was right next to him and the rest of the team came back. Tony and McGee stood next to Ellie, following where her eyes were watching. “Who’s that kid?” Tony asked first.

“I was hoping you could tell me,” Bishop answered.

While on the phone, they saw their boss smiling. A real smile. And then he put his hands in Harry’s curly hair.

“Does Gibbs has a kid we don’t know about?” Tim asked.

“He has green eyes,” Bishop stated.

“So? Do I look like my father?” Tony said, without thinking. Tim and Ellie turned their heads to look at their coworker. “Yeah, bad example, but you get the point.”

Right after Tony’s sentence, Gibbs hang up. The three agents pretended to be occupied at their own desk. Their boss had his arm around Harry’s shoulders as they came back to the bullpen. “Harry is going to be our honorary agent for the day. This is Tim, Tony and Ellie,”

“Hi,” Harry shyly waved at them.

“Hello Honorary agent Harry,” Tony stood up to check the teenager’s hand. “And he is?” Tony asked his boss.

“None of your business,” Gibbs simply answered. Tony growled, unhappy about not having an answer. “Update,”

While the team updated Gibbs on the case and what they found, Harry stayed really close to the boss. Gibbs always had a protective and special warmth towards kids and teenagers, but there was something special there. Tony promised himself to find what was the relationship there, by the end of the day.

Abby knew Gibbs would entered her lab any minute, but he never expected him to come in with a very young special agent. “Abby, Harry. Harry, Abby. Lab tech,” Gibbs said, and both Harry and Abby waved at each other. “What you got, Abs?”

“Many questions,” she said, looking at the teenager’s green eyes.

“Unhappy look,” Harry whispered to her, looking at Gibbs that was standing right behind her, waiting for her report.

“We call it the Gibbs stare, here,” she quickly said, before telling her boss what we wanted to know.

Harry was impressed. We knew things about Gibbs’ job, just like he knows what yours, since you’re a cop too. But what Abby is doing is very impressive to him, he would love to her multiple questions. “Can I stay with her?” Harry asked Gibbs, as they were about to leave the lab.

Jethro definitely hates how weak he can be with Harry. “Okay but a few rules,” Abby and Harry listened carefully, “First, Abby, do not interrogate him. And do not show him weird things his mother can be mad about. And you, bud,” Gibbs took a few steps closer to Harry, “enjoy your day, okay? I’ll come get you for lunch,” Gibbs kissed Harry’s forehead and left.

Abby didn’t waste any time, “Okay, bud,”

“Nope. Only Jethro calls me that. I hate it, but it’s an habit now,”

“Fine. Who are you to my boss?”

“Stepson, I guess. I think?—I’m not sure. Jethro and mum has—“ Harry stopped in the middle on the sentence and turned around. “God, I thought he was standing behind,” he said.

“Does he do that outside of work, too?” Abby asked, super exciting about knowing personal things.

“Yeah, it’s like he has a detector every time we say his name,”

“Today’s going to be so fun!”

Harry has never been into sciences at school, he’s more into languages and literature, just like his father. But Abby Sciuto made it so fun that his curiosity was exploding. Pretty much like the experience he was doing. “What did I do wrong?” Harry said, frustrated about failing.

“You took this,” Abby said, showing a product, “instead of that,” she showed another product.

“Damn!” Harry said. And of course, Gibbs has entered the lab at the very same moment. He extended his hand to his stepson, “do we have to do it even when Joe’s not around?” Harry complained. “I’m not a kid anymore,”

“Fine, but don’t tell your mother. And—what happened here? A tornado?” Gibbs asked, looking at the mess.

“I’m definitely not good at sciences,”

“You just need a good teacher, sweetie,” Abby said. “You can come around when you need help, if your—stepdad is okay,” Abby grinned at Gibbs, happy to know that info.

“What happened in that lab—better stay in that lab,” Gibbs said, “Hungry, bud?”

Gibbs and Harry went to the diner for lunch. “Text your mum, Harry. She’s worried,”

“Dad broke up with Lindsay. He wants me to come back and live with him again,”

“Is that what you want?”

“No—yes—maybe. I don’t know,”

“Hey, whatever you want to do, your parents will agree to it. All they want is for you to be happy, wherever you are,”

“Even if it’s in Australia?” Gibbs looked at Harry, confused. Last he knew, your ex husband is living in California. “Dad had a job offer in Sydney, he said yes. And he’s leaving next month,”

“If you want to go with him, do it,”

“How would you feel about it, J?”

“It doesn’t mat—“

“It matters to me. You’ve been in my life for almost ten years now. At some points, you were more a dad to me than Dad was. And you’re my baby brother’s father. I care about you, and I care about what you think,”

This is typically what Gibbs doesn’t like. He hates that kind of conversation, he hates to let people know how he feels and what he thinks. But if someone deserves to know a little about it, it’s definitely Harry.

“For me, there’s no difference between you and your brother— Family’s more than DNA. It’s about people who care and take care of each other.”

“Stop with those sentences all made up! Tell me how you’d feel if I move to Australia,”

Gibbs chuckled. The shy little boy he met 8 years ago was now becoming a confident young man. “I’ll miss you, okay? Just like I missed when you left for California! Are you happy now?”

“No! I’ll be happy when you and mum stop acting like children, and finally give Joe a stable family,”

“Your mum and I are dysfunctional, but we work that way. Did Joe tell you something?”

“He’s 5 and he wants what any other 5 years old want; he wants to live with his mother and his father, 24/7. In the same household,”

“With his big brother too, right?”

“Yes, but that’s not the point,”

After a blank during which Gibbs intensely stared at Harry, “I didn’t see you grow up. I’m proud of the young man you’re becoming,”

Harry smiled, “Say it,”

“What?” Gibbs asked, his mouth full of his burger.

“You know it! Say it,”

“Nope,”

“Why? Why is it so hard?” Harry paused. “Look— it can be easy when it’s true. I love you, dad.”

Harry called Gibbs “dad” occasionally. Sometimes on purpose, sometimes not. Jethro remembered the first time he heard it from him and the first Joe said it. He felt the same for both. That’s how he knew there was so difference between his real son and his stepson. They are both his sons.

“I love you,” Gibbs mumbled, with French fries in his mouth.

“Didn’t understand. What did you say?”

Gibbs swallowed. “I love you, son! Okay? You happy? Can I eat in silence now?”

“Yes, you can,” Harry proudly smiled.

In the afternoon, Harry stayed with Gibbs until the agent had no choice but to go on a run for the case. Gibbs let his stepson with Ducky. The doc showed Harry around, avoiding the autopsy and corpses obviously. By the end of the day, Ducky and Harry were playing chess at Gibbs’ desk, waiting for everyone to come back. But when they heard the elevator opening, here you were, with Joe in your arms. The little boy got down and ran to his brother as soon as he saw him. You hugged your son tight. “How are you, baby?” You asked.

“I’m good mum,” he smiled and kissed you on the cheek. “I’m beating Ducky,”

“Not yet, young man,” Ducky stood and hugged you. “How’s my favorite Gibbs?” He asked to Joe, who was holding onto his brother like a koala bear.

“Say hi to Ducky, sweetheart,” you told your youngest son and the little boy waved at the doc. Ducky and Harry sat back in their chairs, Joe was still holding Harry and you sat on Jethro’s desk.

“Where’s J?” You asked.

“Followed a lead, he should be back soon,”

The four of you stayed together, talking about everything and nothing until the elevator opened again. This time, it was Gibbs with his team. As soon as Joe saw his dad, he jumped from his brother’s lap and ran into Gibbs’ arm. “Hey baby,”

Tony, Tim and Ellie were more confused than they were hours ago when they met Harry. Ducky couldn’t help but smiling big. Before anyone could say anything, Abby appeared with Jimmy in the bullpen. The entire team was there. “How’d it go?” She asked.

The team explained that it led to nowhere, and they had to go back to the beginning on that case. While they did that, Jethro stole you a quick kiss, and he whispered something in Harry’s ears. “Checkmate!” Your son told Ducky as he made his final move.

“That’s cheating,” Ducky said.

“Nope. Dad and I share one brain,”

When the word “dad” was heard in the bullpen, everyone stopped talking and turned like one man towards Gibbs and you. Your boyfriend laughed, and moved Joe on his back, “Hang on Monkey!” He said.

“Can we go to McDonald’s?” The little boy asked.

“Nope,” “yes!” Gibbs and you answered at the same time. Jethro looked at you, but you were looking at Harry with a smile. “Boys!” You said.

In a second, Joe was tickling his father in the neck, and Harry was searching for his car keys while you were holding his arms. When your oldest found the keys, he handed them to you and the three of you ran to the elevator. “Team work!” You high five the boys.

Gibbs’ team was looking at him, more confused than they have never been in their life. Their boss laughed and walked towards the elevator and his family, “Good night everyone!”

#leroy jethro gibbs x reader #jethro gibbs imagine #jethro gibbs #jethro gibbs x reader #gibbs #gibbs x reader #ncis reader insert #ncis x reader #tony dinozzo #tim mcgee #ellie bishop #abby sciuto #ducky mallard #jimmy palmer

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josiebelladonna · 2 years

Text

this is so long and complex but i’m going to try my best, though: it’s for @postitforward . there are some upsetting topics here so you’ve been warned.

as a child, i lived in a trailer park in the high desert, which didn’t really affect me as much as my older brother, but it definitely did something for me as my parents were less than enthusiastic about my creative endeavors. if i wanted to draw, i was bought paper, but i kept receiving these messages of “this is not okay, you have to get out of this place and work hard” all because we were poor: no doubt my brother played a bit of a role in this.

lived in the nevada desert as a kid even though i was born on the california coast, and we moved six times before i turned four.

i almost lost my mom when i was a toddler: she had a recurring growth in her breast that was malignant but behaved in benign fashion so they were able to remove it with surgery. it came back three times before it went into remission prior to my starting kindergarten.

my mom told me not to wear anything that bears my stomach or my chest because it’s not ladylike—that’s the tamest thing, though. my grandmother openly scolded me for putting my hand down my shorts at 3 years old. my daycare person meanwhile was physically abusive, though: she hit me a few times while i was in the bathtub because i was being “unruly.”

i was 8 years old when 9/11 happened and i didn’t fully understand the gist of it until about a year after.

i almost lost my dad when i was 9 years old: we were rock hounding out in the desert and he must have kicked up something, because a few days later, he had a raging fever and chills. this was in 2002, after the anthrax scare, so they naturally thought it was that: it was a form of pneumonia that mimicked the symptoms of it, but it filled his lungs with fluid to where one collapsed. he survived and a silver lining is that it got him to stop smoking, but he was in the hospital for two weeks.

because of the steep medical bills, we struggled for money, even to pay rent. and then my mom lost her job in the fall.

we were evicted the following march and we went to stay with my maternal grandparents on the other side of town—my mom’s stepdad threatened to call the cops on us, but my grandma stopped him. we were there two weeks until he kicked us out—it was the middle of the school year, too. i had to leave my class and my friends behind as we moved to my other grandparents’ house down in the california desert—it was my earliest memory of crying myself to sleep.

i was bullied to an inhumane extent in fifth grade—my worst bully called me every name you can think of and he even threatened to rape me at one point.

that was also the same year one of my uncles body shamed me. told me i’m of solid build and i’m practically doomed to a life of gaining weight. and when you’re a kid, you’re impressionable.

i experienced a lot of body shaming that year, actually.

i would hear things like… no one will love me if i’m fat or if i gain a lot of weight, and because of my body mass index, i’m destined to health issues (i once heard i wasn’t going to live to 25).

so, figure i developed anorexia. it was accentuated by my paternal grandfather’s passing from brain cancer, and moreover, i couldn’t talk to anyone about it because it was middle school: everyone was hormonal and confused. but i grew more and more isolated. it was the first time i cut myself, too, small paper cuts on my fingers. that’s my first memory of suicidal thoughts.

my saving grace? books, art, and music—namely grunge and heavy metal. the things i was drawn to when we lived in the trailer park. i learned to sing again after i quit choir before we moved to california: my voice changed so i needed some tuning. i also learned to project and control from my tenure in drama club: my voice is a deep, drawling contralto initially influenced by chris cornell, billie joe armstrong, shirley manson, trent reznor, and eddie vedder, and then singers like chuck billy, steve souza, james hetfield, and joey belladonna (i really got into “boy stuff”, dare i say). i played field hockey and baseball but i had to quit after a bit because it was hard on my poorly nourished body: instead, i started bike riding and hiking more. i watched baseball, ice hockey, figure skating, formula one, and cycling, things that spoke to my personality and got my blood flowing, even when i wasn’t on the field as much.

yeah, i struggled with my weight all through high school: at 14, i had something close to abs; at 15, i had a belly; at 16, i was trim and then i had a belly again; at 17, i was somewhere in between for a bit until the couple of months before my graduation. i mention that time period because my parents split. in horrific fashion no less. they had a shouting match right in front of me. my dad confessed that he had had a drug problem for years: for all i know, he did it while we were in the trailer, two feet away from my brother and me. my mom struggled with it, too, such that she took the money and ran out with it.

my dad and i came back to an empty house, and with no money. my relatives, including my own brother and his wife at the time, were more than reluctant to help the two of us, and me in particular. i understand “welcome to the real world, kiddo”, but when your kid sister is living on the street and with a history of a serious and known-to-be-deadly eating disorder and very minimal work experience given i was more focused on school and enriching myself, it’s hard to see you in a good light.

before i went off to school, like the week before, there was a massive wildfire right by where my dad and i were staying. even though the fire was put out after three days, i thought for sure i was going to die. i went off to school in oregon on the train by myself after my parents promised to be with me then. 2011 was without question the worst year of my life.

the next year was slightly better as i returned to art while in engineering school, and i soon realized that art was my calling. but i couldn’t go to art school: the closest art school to me was six hours away in portland. and to add insult to injury, everyone in my family thought i was nuts for wanting to change majors like that. in the fall of my sophomore year, i could feel the depression creeping in and my anorexia was coming back: a highlight was a trip to the oregon coast over thanksgiving. the town i went to was an art hotspot (everything from painters to toy makers to writers to theater people to glass artists). i fell in love with that whole region the second i stepped into a glass gallery: i took stained glass in my senior year of high school so it gave me a healthy dose of nostalgia.

after the whole 2012 nonsense, and i was unable to speak to anyone about my feelings, i decided that was it for me. for six months, i flirted with a noose and the harsh cold—didn’t help that my weight was dropping like a rock, either.

the thing that almost did it for me was when i lied to my mom about signing up for classes for the spring term and she got angry with me once she found out about it—but that was the only way i could convince her that i wasn’t happy. but i still couldn’t tell her about it because she already spread the word that i was a flake and a dropout. i figured that was it for me for real at that point. i was a failure and a loser.

i had the noose around my neck but it was my own tears that got me out of it. my stepdad came in to see how i was doing and we started talking about it, and then he led me out of there and i saw my mom looking up art schools in oregon. i switched to the art program down at the local community college for my two-year: i still want my master’s degree.

later that year, i developed horrible… ahem. FUCKING HORRIBLE. anxiety. to the point i couldn’t sleep and i was hallucinating. i forget how i came down from it, but it got so bad i had to take six months off from school. but it helped: i decided to do something about my poor stomach especially. lucky for me, i had money to buy more food and i started gaining weight, healthy weight. i worked for a month at a coffee shop and that alone helped me gain twenty pounds from the free cappuccinos and lattes—i was riding my bike to work but my body still wanted it.

but then i started getting the fat shaming. and then the month ran out. and i kept hearing messages about how… my art isn’t good enough and i NeEd To FiNd WoRk InStEaD. it all built up again, and to the point i literally couldn’t live on my own. the month before my graduation, i almost checked into the psychiatric ward at the hospital—the thing that stopped me was my mom and stepdad moving back to his mom’s house down in the california mountains because she died the year before and the house was abandoned. i didn’t want to leave oregon but i didn’t have much choice.

after the move, i started working out more. i met chris cornell and had a parasocial relationship with him—he loved my art and he loved me. he was my comfort when my grandma died in summer 2016 (my sister-in-law was killed in a car accident a month later). he was my comfort when i started asserting myself more to my family and they thought there was something wrong with me: my dad tried to get me to go to alcoholics anonymous because he’s an alcoholic and therefore i must be, too—i’m not, i’m just gonna tell you that right now. but he’s thoroughly convinced, though: even before i moved, my skin was starting to clear up and i was feeling physically healthier.

when chris died, it felt like my parents splitting all over again and the rug was yanked out from under me. i went offline for two years and i swear to god, everyone forgot me. when i came back online in late 2018, and i tried to gain traction again… needless to say, i couldn’t. my brother showed “concern” and thought i was losing my mind (when i hadn’t had any horrible thoughts in over a year at that point), and started calling me late at night to ramble about complete bullshit. i put a stop to it after four times: it was just too much and he didn’t let me talk, either.

i found power in writing in 2019, specifically fan writing. that summer, i came to instagram for my art. my stepdad’s alcoholism however started to pick up: he was a mean drunk, too. mean and borderline abusive.

then the pandemic hit. oh, jesus. for me, it wasn’t that bad: the one change was wearing the mask. but then, my social life went sideways again: someone i thought was my friend plagiarized from me, cut me off, and then blamed me for it when i tried to stand up for myself. once again, i tried to tell someone about it and somehow, my brother got word of it and he called the cops on me (all while posing as my dad) in an attempt to get me on suicide watch—i don’t know why he’s so dumb. a smart guy with a bachelors degree in chemical engineering and experience in the astronomy department, with six children… and yet his mormon faith and his own bullshit ate his brain.

but then… come last year… i met him on a whim. the amazing, the beautiful, probably the love of my life, alex skolnick. i caught him on his livestream and i was enthralled. it felt like he was seducing me. i drew a cartoon for him and he shared it the day before valentine’s day. he was so sweet and kind. i started mingling with him more. mingling turned into flirting, flirting turned into crushing, crushing turned into more crushing… i love him so much, i wrote a million word fanfic about it—it’s not done, either! i’ve struggled with my sexuality for years, too, and it started cropping up in the summer before the pandemic: from not feeling it to wondering if i even have one to wondering if it’s even there to wondering if it’s even functional… but he woke up something in me. i called him handsome and he liked it, and i liked that he liked it: it made him feel good about himself and it makes me feel sexy for once. i told him i love him to the moon and back on christmas eve. but i’m not confident about talking about him with people, especially with my history of fangirling, too, being told that it’s just a phase—if there’s any good out of it, however, it’s that it’s only made me feel closer to him. i’m literally considering discontinuing art on facebook because no one sees it—and i can’t say anything about it, either, not without running the risk of being put in the nuthouse—and i can’t afford not being seen anymore.

my whole life, i’ve been given these messages that it isn’t okay to be me. that i am not allowed to be here and that nothing about me matters. i was never encouraged to have boundaries, either: whenever i refused something, i would be guilt tripped into it, told that “i don’t know what i’m missing”—glad the worst drug i ever tried was l.s.d., otherwise i probably wouldn’t even be writing this—that my tastes, my likes and dislikes, my feelings, everything about me is inherently wrong, from family, from friends, from society.

i was never told to express myself and that i could be a creative person my whole life: if anything, i was discouraged from it. from expression, from joy and pleasure, from true life itself. i had to seek it out myself, and when i did, the atmosphere outside my door was so toxic and obsessive that i refuse to share anything i make or who i love for that matter with family. it all almost completely destroyed me. i am forced, time and time again, to apologize for being me. i am forced time and time again to forfeit my power because the other alternative is to be turned away and left to die—and weirdly, whenever i talked about death, i’m looked at with concern. i am not loved: i’m seen as disposable.

but i have to live, though. i have something to do. there’s a reason why i’m here, and it’s not to please someone or to make money. i feel like that in and of itself should be enough: knowing you have a purpose, knowing there’s a reason why you were born and you came to planet earth. i feel like that alone should bestow you with strength. i know it has with me.

#post it forward #mental health #mental health month #your happy place #personal #text #journaling #healingjourney #healing

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365days365movies · 4 years

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February 27, 2021: Love Actually (2003) (Part 1)

We gotta start this Recap.

Just trust me here, this one’s gonna be a lot. Why? Because this is Love Actually.

And I really want to talk about it, I REALLY do, but...this is not only a long movie, but an anthology, so it’s gonna be...complicated. But, I will say one thing. If you’ve been reading this since January, then you’ll know that this blog was inspired by the book Shit, Actually by Lindy West, a collection of hilarious movie essays that I love. And, yeah, this film is its namesake. So, although I want to go more into it, we gotta get started. Sorry for the rush, but...TRUST ME.

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

An airport! We see families and other loved ones reunited at Heathrow, as narration begins, telling us that love is everywhere. After name-dropping 9/11...TWO YEARS after it had happened (too soon, David), he states that “love actually is all around.”

Got it. So, as the 2003 film All Around begins, singer Billy Mack (Bill Nighy) is trying to sing a Christmas-themed version of “Love Is All Around,” which is pretty goddamn bad. His recording manager Joe (Gregor Fisher) agrees. Jamie (Colin Firth) tells his sick girlfriend (Sienna Guillory) that he loves her, and he takes off for something that he can’t attend.

Daniel (Liam Neeson), a fresh widower, calls his friend Karen (Emma Thompson) a mom bidding her daughter a good day as she heads to school. Jack (Martin Freeman) and Judy (Joanna Page) are...air humping on a set? I need to know more. Peter (Chiwetel Ejiofor) and Juliet (Kiera Knightley) are getting married in a church, with their friend Mark (Andrew Lincoln) as the best man. And FINALLY, David (Hugh Grant) has just been elected as the new Prime Minister, where he meets Natalie (Martine McCutcheon), a member of the household staff.

...Well, that is a lot. Goddamn. So, this is an anthology movie, huh? I’ll try to cover this as smoothly as I can.

Peter and Juliet say their vows, and as they walk out, they are surprised by a rendition of the Beatles’ “All You Need Is Love”, organized by Mark. At the wedding is Jamie, whose brother is at his apartment when he returns home early. He’s there to fuck his girlfriend. Oh. Shit. Well, sorry, Jamie.

Also at the wedding is Colin (Kris Marshall), a waiter and messenger who’s been trying to woo British women, but is constantly failing. When talking to his friend Tony (Abdul Sallis), he insists that he’s going to the USA, where the women will appreciate his accent. Tony tells him to simply accept that he’s a “lonely, ugly asshole”. Colin, in response, calls himself a God of sex on the wrong continent. A pair, these two.

Tony is a production assistant, working on the film that Jack and Judy are in. They’re apparently professional stand-ins, actors who substitute actors in film set-up, in order to figure out lighting and cinematography. Neat! Well, normally. Here, they’re standing in for a sex scene, and they ask Judy to go topless, to see how best to frame the shot. And it gets...increasingly awkward. And it’s pretty goddamn funny.

Meanwhile, a funeral. Oof, tone whiplash right there. It’s a funeral for Daniel’s wife Joanna, and she leaves behind him and her son, Sam (Thomas Sangster AKA fuckin’ Joffrey, but I won’t hold that against him). Back at the wedding, Mark stares on longingly at the dancing Peter and Juliet. A woman asks if he’s in love with Mark, and he replies no.

At an office building, another guest at the wedding, Sarah (Laura Linney), is a worker at a graphic design company run by Harry (...awww, Alan Rickman). His secretary Mia (Heike Makatsch) brings her in to Harry’s office, where he tells her that he and everyone else in the office knows that she’s in love with fellow worker Karl (Rodrigo Santoro), and that he should get it over with an ask him out. He walks by her, and she doesn’t say anything, while also recieving a call...from someone she refers to as “babe”. Well, I feel a little infidelity coming on.

On Mia’s radio, Billy Mack’s shitty Christmas song is playing, and a radio host agrees as Bill’s brought on for an interview. Bill shares the sentiment in what must be the most depressing radio interview I’ve ever heard. In that interview with Mikey (Marcus Brigstocke), he basically completely sabotages his own record, and probably his entire career. This interview is followed with news about the Prime Minister.

David, new PM, has been bonding more with Natalie, and the two definitely appear to like each other. He also comes up in conversation between Judy and Jack, as their stand-in sex scene has progressed to basically just straight-up sex, which feels...I feel like this doesn’t fucking happen with stand-ins in movies...right? Like, come on, that’s a LOT of breached privacy, and I feel like it’s not that realistic. Anyway, the two use the opportunity to make small talk, and Jack tells Judy that he appreciates having someone to talk to. She agrees, and it’s cute in an extremely awkward way!

Production assistant Tony is heading home, and is getting a ride from Colin, who announces that he’s bought a ticket for a trip to the beautiful land of Wisconsin, where he will certainly meet some hot, hot babes. Tony does not agree.

Back at Harry’s office, he and Mia plan the company Christmas party. Mia unsubtly notes that she kinda has the hots for him, and he’s not saying no. Meanwhile, Daniel and Karen are talking about the fact that his stepson Sam seems to be having a lot of trouble, understandably, and Daniel’s not doing much better.

Karen does her best to help him through it, and Daniel does his best to help the troubled Samuel. But he can’t coax much out of Samuel to figure out what’s wrong. Samuel finally opens up, but tells Daniel that he’s in love. Daniel’s surprised, but he insists that he’s in love, with a young woman named Sansa Stark, but he must find a way to ensure her loyalty, if ONLY HER NOBLE FATHER WASN’T IN THE...right, sorry, Game of Thrones.

OK, anyway, Sam’s in love, and in complete agony about it. Daniel tries to coach Sam through his feelings, and is genuinely being a supportive-as-hell stepdad. Also in love and in agony is Sarah, staring at Karl from afar one night as the office closes down. And then, also in agony is Jamie, fresh off of his breakup with his cheating girlfriend. He’s in a GORGEOUS AS FUCK house in the French countryside, and sits down to write.

Back in London, David tries to get to know Natalie a bit better, and they...I mean, they’re 100% gonna get together by the end. We’re just working through the romantic folderol right now. Natalie leaves, and David asks a portrait of Margaret Thatcher is she had that problem, calling her a, uh...a “saucy minx.” Well, OK.

Billy Mack is on a television show, continuing his press tour and reminding us once again that he used to be addicted to heroin. Joe is not happy. Mark, an artist, calls Peter, and is put on the line with Juliet. Peter asks him to “be nice,” but when he they talk to each other, he’s rather short when she asks for some of his footage from the wedding.

Back at Harry’s, Mia is laying it on fuckin’ THIIIIIICK, Jesus, while Sarah ends up pining once more for Karl. At his college in the French countryside, a new housekeeper, Aurélia ( Lúcia Moniz), has been hired to take care of his place. However, there’s a serious language barrier between the two, as she’s Portuguese, and he’s too talkative, goddamn. It’s awkward. It’s a little awkward.

David’s got a meeting with the President of the United States (Billy Bob Thornton), who IMMEDIATELY notes Natalie’s attractiveness. Political tensions are also rough between the two and their administrations. The two have a private meeting later, and David leaves the room for a moment. However, when he goes back in, he sees Natalie kissing the President! Whaaaaaaaat? That’s a...fucking terrible idea, Mr. President, what the FUCK? HAVE YOU HEARD OF BILL CLINTON

The next day, at a press conference, David gives into his rage about the affair, and he acts more assertive towards the President, noting that he won’t bow to the President’s bullying. Wow. International crisis time because of a fuckin’ girl! Who’s the saucy minx, now, Thatcher? WHO’S THE SAUCY MINX NOW

Right afterwards, he gets a call from his sister: Karen. Huh. She notes her frustrations with his actions, but he’s too busy and hangs up. She states her frustrations to her husband: Harry. DOUBLE HUH. After everything, though, David retires for the night. The radio station plays a song for him, and David responds by dancing around 10 Downing Street. And it’s hilarious. And I love it?

At Jamie’s cottage, he and Aurélia start to bond regardless of their language barrier, and their conversations seem to gel with each other, despite them not understanding that themselves. It’s actually...kind of cute. I dunno, I kind of like it. I think it’s sweet. Overly saccharine, yeah, but sweet as the two fall in love. Yeah, I’m a fuckin’ sap, what can I say?

Juliet visits Mark, who’s once again acting fairly cold towards her. She confronts him about it, and notes that she wants to genuinely become friends with him. Mark seems to agree with this, but still notes that he has no video of the wedding. And yet, she finds it, only to discover that Mark doesn’t hate her. Actually, he likes her. Actually...he loves her. And, uh...fuck, yeah, he LOOOOOOOOVES her. And she figures that out once she realizes that the video of the wedding doesn’t feature Peter in it AT ALL.

Y’know, I’m really worried that this is becoming an infidelity situation, but I have to admit...Mark’s a good man, and a great friend to Peter. He knows that he loves Juliet, but he keeps his distance for the sake of his friend. And that is...actually amazingly honorable. Damn. You’re a good man, Mark.

At 10 Downing Street, David asks his assistant Annie (Nina Sosanya) to put Natalie in another position, as her presence is distracting him. And that is...responsible. That’s pretty damn responsible. OK, I can dig it. She’s soon replaced, and you can see that David is saddened by that.

His sister’s best friend's stepson, Sam, has just gotten bad news. His crush, Joanna (oh, yeah, his crush has the same name as his deceased mother, forgot to mention THAT little tidbit), is going back to the USA. After discovering that she’s American, Daniel decides to cheer him up by watching Titanic together. AND AGAIN. This relationship is adorable, and I love Daniel’s hardcore good dad energy.

Jamie and Aurélia need to bid each other goodbye, as Jamie is headed back to England. However, as they part, Aurélia kisses him goodbye, which seems to break him a little. Meanwhile, Billy Mack has shot a video for his terrible song, which inspires Sam to perform in a school concert to get Joanna to fall in lover with him and get her to stay. But he doesn’t play an instrument, and chooses to learn the drums, to Daniel’s dismay.

At Harry’s company Christmas party, Mia is hitting HARDCORE on Harry, which Karen notices. She’s speaking to Sarah, and encourages her to dance with Karl, while to two stand in front of Mark’s photographs, and...

TOO MUCH. IT’S TOO GODDAMN MUCH

I...I gotta take a break, and we’re at the halfway point anyway. See you in Part 2.

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jean----ralphio · 4 years

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Ep 5 of BoB tiiiime <3

Episode 5: Crossroads, but I’m renaming it “Holy crap is this a whooper of an ep, guys. So much haaaappeeeeens. Also, I freaked out cos I thought it was Bastogne but now I’m like oh phew. That’s for Future!Laura to freak out about”.

Ready? Let’s go!

01:15 Johnny ‘unimpressed’ Martin pulling one of his patented bitch-faces in the credits, we stan.

02:31 OHHHHH IT’S IRL DICK! We love you!!!

03:45 God I love the technique they use with the shaking, ground-level camera whenever Dick is running. It’s so realistic. And how he’s gasping for breath. Not like in movies when people just seem to run forever so easily. This whole scene, the pacing and the setting, you don’t know what’s happened or what’s happening currently, all you know is he’s running and alone and breathless and it’s all so frantic and my heart just cannot take it with this fucking show you guys!

04:04 Oh God. The kid. He sorta smiles? He doesn’t get it at first. I can’t.

04:10 SCHOONDERLOGT??!! THIS PLACE IS CALLED SCHOONDERLOGT? I LOVE IT!!!

04:34 Wake up from your post-coital nap, Nix!

04:42 Genuinely thought Dick was slapping his butt LMAO

04:46 HOE DON’T DO IT

04:55 I love how Dick is horrified for exactly a split second and then he’s just like LOL. Real talk, when does he laugh around anyone but Nix? He smiles around others but not the same as when he’s with Nix, and he sure as heck doesn’t laugh. Except for maybe with Harry. But Harry’s Harry, it’s a given.

05:15 Nix has forgiven him quickly, it seems. Probably because Dick let him sit in the front seat.

05:22 They’re so married.

06:13 Don’t flirt with Dick’s husband, Hot Brit.

06:23 He just did it again, after I specifically told him not to! You’re on thin ice now, Hot Brit.

06:47 Dick hasn’t been doing his homework.

06:54 No Dick, Nix is busy with his new hot friend, go do your homework.

07:07 What happens if you make a mistake on a typewriter? Can’t backspace lol. Imagine all that typing, getting to like the last character and fucking it up.

07:26 DOGGIE!

08:00 OK I’m sorry which guy was it that just burst in screaming “PENETRATION!” I need to marry them even though I’m already married, and I don’t think it was Rich. Whoever it was, I want to shake their hand, at least.

08:17 No. Do not blame Lieb for anything, ever.

08:29 Roe in action <3

08:39 “Hey Alley.” “Heyyy.” I love them. My babies <3

08:53 The boys want revenge.

09:33 Lol @ Tab, “They’re not as smart as me and you?”

10:23 ISTG I need a translation or subtitles for the hand-signals. I would hard out be chillin at the back yelling “WTF MAN. DICK! HEY DICK! I. DO. NOT. UNDERSTAND. YOU.” And then we’d all die cos they’d hear.

10:26 RICH! IT’S RICH YOU GUYS!!!

11:22 RICH <3

12:14 LMAO Lieb is so excited.

12:33 Dick is so fucking smart, making sure everyone has a target to eliminate so they’re not outnumbered for long and the most immediate threats are taken care of <3

12:38 RICH <3 It’s so cool to see him doing his mortar thing, not just comic relief or providing me with dopamine by simply existing.

14:29 The gunshots and then crossing to the typewriter keys ugh this shooooooow

15:40 Enter?? LMFAO Who says that!! Oh look, Nix has come to apologize for encouraging the flirtatious Hot Brit. He missed you <3

15:52 Dick is in love with Nix. And Nix is in love with Dick. Husbands <3

16:15 This entire exchange is the most A+ flirting. I love how Dick just plants the thought and leaves it to Nix. He doesn’t push. He accepts Nix as he is and <3’s him

16:59 LOL @ Nix “That’s not literature… say ‘we’ a lot,” so supportive and helpful.

17:35 Nervous boys

17:41 Johnny ‘unimpressed’ Martin is starting to bitch-face, watch out…

17:52 Oh no.

18:12 Lol @ Lieb, you can see he’s yelling

18:35 Dick looks so BAMF

19:11 Hoob, it’s not a competition!

20:00 Web <3

20:08 Johnny, chill!

20:48 Oh Web. “Jesus Christ, they got me!” Rivalling Buck for being dramatic af, baby

21:24 Aw Dick

21:36 Lieb find some chill for once in your life. Are you upset Web got hurt?

21:42 Do not speak to your father that way!

21:59 You’re in time-out, young man!

22:17 Ross McCall is freaking hot omg. LMAO @ Lieb though, his Dad is not happy and now he’s grounded.

22:30 No, Web, no one believes much of what you say tbh, sweetie. Still <3 you though.

24:01 You can tell it’s Nix by the way he walks and his shoulders <3333

24:16 Nix doesn’t know who that is aw

24:34 Aw Nix trying to be comforting and supportive the way Dick was to him earlier. But his husband is too moody.

25:53 I love that Sink asks it that way, “How would you feel?” Rather than surprise bitch you’re doing it. I mean you don’t say no to that kinda thing but still. Sink = <3 He’s such a babe

26:16 RICH! EVERYONE STOP, NOTHING ELSE WILL EVER MATTER IT’S RICH. I was starting to miss him in case you couldn’t tell. Lol wtf is he doing to Penk’s ear, and why with a spoon??!!

26:26 Aw Dick. He wants to know his sons will be well looked after by their new stepdad.

26:35 ROE <3

26:47 Nix couldn’t stay away long

27:05 NIX! No!

27:14 LMAO bacon sandwich. Loves how Dick gives the report to Nix, not his orderly.

27:26 He missed you obvs

28:13 Moose, you look after his sons!

28:29 Aw Dick can’t let go <3

28:38 Nix’s resigned little sigh and shoulder slump aha

28:54 Bull! Missed you! As identifiable as ever by the cigar… but is now the best time to be smoking it??

29:31 Their code is Leicester Square! So cute!

29:46 Lieb is so eager for blood-shed

30:40 Aw they gave Moose a beret!

30:39 Dick is jealous he doesn’t get a beret! But he’s so happy his sons are safe.

31:17 I always scream.

31:50 Roe <3 “Mo’phine.”

32:11 “You oughtta. You are officers, you are grown-ups! You oughtta know!” ICONIC. My heart. His faaaaace. Shane Taylor <3333

32:19 The bloody handprint omg

32:46 The boss jacket returns <3

33:11 Nix is so proud.

33:41 We missed you Bill <3

33:48 Dad’s a busy man now Bill.

34:25 “I don’t wanna see another piece of paper!” Dick is always such a mood. Never change, Dick <3

34:20 Whatcha doing, Nix? About to propose? God I wish. You know Dick would say yes.

34:35 Don’t interrupt the proposal, Harry!

34:42 Dick and I are just both going to pretend we didn’t hear that, Nix. Canon not accepted.

34:59 Dick would rather be with you tbh

35:30 So they all just sit around in parade dress? Wait is that parade dress? It is, isn’t it? Someone @ me?

35:34 Rude

36:05 Dick. Don’t stare at the child, Dick.

36:52 Dick. Stop. Seriously.

38:05 Can’t tell if that’s cute or weird tbh

38:31 He’s moping cos he misses Nix

39:03 Unf

39:30 Joe/Charlie <3 Missed you

39:38 I don’t know what I love more, Luz being such a troll or Rich. Hang on, what am I saying. Rich.

39:44 RICCCHHHH

39:48 Iconic. ILY Rich

40:00 Easy Mum and Joe/Charlie are so mad lmao. The just wanna watch the movie, shut up kids.

40:17 Dad’s back, Buck, it’s OK now.

40:42 Oh Buck </3

40:57 Joe/Charlie is about to shank you, Luz, stop.

41:02 Iconic.

41:19 Who dis bitch?

41:23 All I see is Rich.

41:34 Rich! Dramatic af

42:02 Oh Buck </3

42:42 Dad’s not happy

43:09 Dad’s. Not. Happy.

43:54 Babe looking cute <3

44:09 Rich <33333333

44:40 Stop hazing the new kid, guys!

45:14 Rich LMAO “We can’t be in Hell, it’s too damn cold!” We <3 you

46:11 Strayer’s a bit useless, let’s be honest

46:31 Babe <3

47:50 LMAO JIMMY FALLON

48:00 Joe/Charlie just wants all the ammo

48:22 RICH

48:38 “We’re paratroopers, lieutenant, we’re supposed to be surrounded.” Dick you are an icon.

49:31 ITS RICH

49:54 Love that, Dick walking in the space between the rows of his men <3

50:19 So ominous 0.o

In conclusion, I love this show.

#band of brothers #liveblog #winnix #ep 5 #hits right in the feels

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canumoveurseatup-no · 6 years

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Little Girls Like You pt.2

Summary: Your mother starts working from home for a while and that leaves less time for you and Tony to continue your rendezvous. One night you hear your mother and Tony going at it and it sparks something in you to get back at him

Pairing: Tony x Black!Reader

WC: 4.9K

Warnings: 18+!! a bit of angst, daddy kink, jealousy, crude language, age gap, oral (both receiving), unprotected sex (use protection guys!!)

A/N: You asked, I answered. Here is LGLY pt2 and I hope you enjoy. I’m also giving credit to @blackreaders-assemble because we bounced ideas for Stepdad!Tony off of each other. If you like this please leave feedback and reblog :)

You know you should have regretted what happened but you didn’t. Well, not until your mother told you two she would be working from home because the office was getting renovated. Tony didn’t pay much attention to you anymore and though what happened between you only happened once, you became attached.

It wasn’t until your mother started feeling all over him while she was home that you started to regret what happened. You should have known nothing would really come out of that night as he was practically your stepfather. You would sit quietly at dinner as they talked about the plans they made and you’d feel a bit of jealousy in your stomach that would take away your appetite.

“Honey, what’s wrong? I made your favorite,” your mother smiled at you. Her sweet tone honestly threw you off as you two never had a good relationship anyway. You were surprised she knew what you favorite even was.

“Thank you, but I’m just not hungry,” you pushed your plate away, “I will take it to the library with me,” you could feel Tony looking at you but you avoided eye contact, you couldn’t let him know how you were really feeling.

You have been warned plenty of times by multiple people that you’d most likely become attached to the person you lose your virginity to, but you didn’t take heed to that warning.

“Library?,” your mom asked.

“Yes, Y/F/N likes to go late at night because there aren’t that many people there to distract them. They’re taking summer classes so I told them I’d keep them company,” you get up from the table and got a Tupperware bowl to put your food in and grabbed your phone and keys,

“Drive safely, please,”

--------

The library wasn’t that bad. You checked out a book that you had started reading while Y/F/N studied. You came back around 12 at night and figured your mom and Tony would be asleep, but you were wrong when you started climbing the steps and heard your mother moaning and Tony groaning.

Your shoulders sank as you entered your room and threw your book on your chair in the corner of your room. As you plugged your headphones into your phone, you felt sick as you heard him groaning her name and you immediately put your headphones on and blasted the loudest song on your playlist, knowing your ears would be ringing in the morning but it’d be better than having to hear what had been going on in the next room over.

-------

The next morning the house was quiet. Your music was still playing and your phone was about to die. You close your music off and plug your phone into the charger before getting out of bed to shower and get ready for work. You were hoping the two were out shopping or getting breakfast as you got ready, but your hopes were let down when you saw Tony sitting in his boxer briefs at the table while drinking his coffee and reading the newspaper.

You didn’t make eye contact as he spoke to you in a chipper tone, “Morning, Y/N/N,”

You didn’t reply as you grabbed yourself a cup of oatmeal to take with you on the go, you grabbed a bottle of water and placed the two items in your bag.

“Your mother went to the store to get some things and told me to let you know to text her if you need anything,”

“I don’t need anything, I’m good and if I did I could just... dr-drive myself,” you stutter, still not looking at him as you search around the kitchen for your keys. You didn’t want to be late and you were getting worked up

“Here they are, baby,” Tony held up your keys and you looked at his finger that swung the ring around.

“Please don’t call me that,” you mumble as you head over to him to grab your keys but he snatches them away from you.

“Why not?,” he frowns, “You weren’t saying that a few weeks ago,”

“What happened a few weeks ago was a mistake. Now may I please have my keys so I can go to work and forget about this place for a few hours?,” you stomped your foot in frustration.

He grabbed your arm and that’s when you finally looked him in the eye, you couldn’t tell what vibe they were giving off, “Didn’t seem like a mistake then, now did it?,”

“That was before I came in last night and heard you boning her,”

“You can’t seriously be mad at me for sleeping with your mother. We are together after all,” he furrowed his brows.

“That’s what makes the whole ordeal more of a mistake. I’m glad she is finally paying attention to you, Tony,” you snatched your keys and stormed out the front door, breathing heavily as you got in the car and drove away to get to work.

---------

“Who do I have to fight for making such a pretty face frown?,” you looked up from your desk at the physical therapy office and smiled, “Hey, Clint,” you hand him the clipboard to let him sign himself in, “How’s the arm?,”

“A lot better. Haven’t been needing to come as often. But back to you, why the long face?,”

You shrug and wave it off, “Just problems at home is all. Nothing too serious, I’ll get over it,”

He smirks down at you and nods, “Well, since you’re back in town and on break, how about I take you out tonight to get your mind off of what’s happening?,”

He was a really cute guy, very sweet and quite comical and he’s older which is your type so you decide go for it, “Sounds like a date,” you smile at him and he tells you he’ll pick you up at 7.

“Actually, how about I pick you up. My mother doesn’t know I’m into a... more mature audience,”

Clint gives a hearty chuckle and nods in agreement, “You’re a grown ass woman, Y/N,”

“You know how I am with my mother,” you shrugged and he just hummed in agreement.

“Well, you know my number and address,” He points to his file, “So just gimme a call when you’re on the way,” he winks at you and you give him a sure nod.

Tonight would be a good night to forget everything that has happened underneath that roof within the past few weeks.

---------

So you changed your mind and Clint was actually on his way to pick you up. Your mother and Tony had left for a date so you figured there wouldn’t be a problem with him coming to get you. You wore what you felt most comfortable in and just did your face up a tiny bit, not wanting to over do it.

You heard the doorbell ring and you grabbed your wallet and phone, rushing down the steps. You swung the door open and Clint stood in front of you with a happy smile.

“You look great,” you compliment

“Me? You look amazing!,” he handed you a small bouquet of your favorite flowers and you set them on table in the foyer.

“You really pay attention don’t you?,” you ask as you smile at the flowers.

“No, I had to ask almost everyone in the office to find out,” he admits.

“Smart move, Barton. So where are we headed?,” You close and lock the door behind you heading to his car. He opens the door for you and you get in and buckle yourself up as he shuts the door and jogs over to his side.

“Nice little place in the inner harbor,” he starts the car and starts driving away, “Just something nice to get your mind off things. There’s fireworks, drinks, dancing. Everything a little girl like you needs to relax,” he pats your thigh and your stomach jumps at the fact he referred to you as a little girl. Only one other person did that and that was the one person you were trying to rid your mind of.

————

You and Clint laughed under the fireworks as you danced and did horrible versions of the cotton eyed Joe and jitterbug. You threw your head back in laughter as alcohol flowed in your bloodstream. He pulled you close as you kept dancing.

You were having such a good time you didn’t want the night to end. The food you had was amazing, the sights were breathtaking, the people were beyond lovely it was just an overall great environment to be in right now. You kept thanking him for even caring enough to do this for you.

“Take me home...,” you whisper against his lips, “And stay the night with me,”

He raised his brows in interest, “Ya sure?,”

“So sure,” you huffed, your lips softly met his and your wrapped your fingers around his next to pull him closer.

“O-okay. Okay let’s go,” he nodded. He took your hand in his and you two ran to the car like teenagers sneaking out of the house past curfew. Hearts pumping, smiles wide and adrenaline coursing through your veins.

He held the door open for you yet again and waiting until you were buckled up before he closed the door and ran around to his side. This is good for you right? It’s healthy? To be with someone else, someone who has no ties with you other than work.

Clint drove down the street and you could tell he wanted to speed but he realized he has you in the car and didn’t want to risk any lives tonight.

“You sure your parents won’t care you’re bringing someone like me over?,”

“Hmph,” you scoffed, “It’s just my mother and her boyfriend and they don’t quite matter. Plus when they go out for dates they stay out for almost the whole night. So we have more than enough time to ourselves. They’ll probably be too drunk to notice your car anyway,”

You turned your head to look at him with a sultry smirk and he just shook his head back at you, “You’re doing unspeakable things to me, baby,”

You put your tongue in between your teeth and smiled as you winked at him, “That’s just one of the many unspeakable things that will be happening tonight I guess, huh?,”

————

You two rushed out of the car and you were trying to rush and get your key in the keyhole so you could hurry to get inside and get a roll on tonight’s events.

Clint was kissing up and down your neck and running his hands all over your body when you finally got the door open. He pushed you inside and slammed the door behind him, turning you around and pinning you to the door. Leaving a trail of kisses from your neck down to your cleavage as you moaned out into the quiet foyer of the house.

“You sure your mom and her boyfriend won’t be back for a while?,” he asked to be certain.

“Please stop bringing them up. I told you they don’t matter,” you attached your lips to his as he picked you up to wrap your legs around his waist.

“Is that right?,”

The voice came from behind Clint and you two froze. You curse under your breath and braced yourself on his shoulders to make sure you wouldn’t hurt yourself when you dropped your legs. You looked over his shoulder to find Tony standing there in his night clothes with his glasses on.

“Figured you and mom would be gone,” you swallow heavily.

“Your mother got called in for a conference in Boston, so we came back early to find you gone and she told me to stay up to make sure you made it home safely and I see that... you have definitely made it home.. safely,” he eyes Clint up and down, “You can leave now,”

“W-What?,” You shrieked, “No, Clint you don’t have to go, he has no authority over me or this house,” you cut your eye at Tony and he raised an eyebrow.

“Is that right? So if I call the cops right now they wouldn’t mind acknowledging that this is also my residence now, correct?,”

You flared your nostrils at him and turned back to Clint, “I’ll call you tomorrow. I’m sorry,”

“Not your fault, baby doll,”

You smiled at him as he kissed you once more before leaving and shutting the door. You and Tony waited until he was out of the driveway to start talking again.

“So he can call you that but I can’t?,” Tony scoffs.

“He’s not dating my estranged mother. He also didn’t lie to me and tell me that the only reason why he sticks around in this household is because of me, so there’s that!,” you walk past him in the kitchen and practically rip the door open to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

“Y/N, stop acting like a child! That night wasn’t a mistake but I am dating your mother,” he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighs.

“It was a mistake,” you deadpan. Taking a sip of your water, you blink the small wave of tears away and roll your eyes.

“Why was it a mistake huh? Because that very night you were begging for it, telling me how much you loved it,”

“It was just a mistake, Tony. You’re right, you’re dating my mother but that doesn’t take it away. Didn’t change the fact that I’m jealous of that insufferable bitch who only pays attention to you when she’s free of conferences and isn’t needed at the office for a week or two and can work from home,”

“Don’t talk about your mother that way,” he comes to her defense and you become mind boggled.

“Wow,” you laugh bitterly, “Yeah you’re right. I apologize, I didn’t mean to talk about your precious Y/M/N like that,” you frown and play with the cap of your bottle, “I wish I could take that night back, I wish... I wish it never happened because then it would make it so much easier for these feelings to be overlooked. But it’s fine, I get it because you know... lucky for you, I’ve got all these daddy issues. I mean my own dad didn’t want anything to do with me. My mom is too fucking selfish to care about anything other than finance and business and she never really wanted a fucking child anyway so of course it makes sense,” you laugh at yourself and Tony just looks at you confused.

“What feelings, Y/N?” He tilts his head in question, “And of course your mother wanted you, what are you talking about?,”

You laugh out loud in his face and slap a hand on the counter, “Did she tell you that? Because that’s not what she told me,” you shook your head, “No no noooo. She told me she never wanted anything to do with children because she can’t stand them. She says children don’t do anything but hold their parents back... imagine telling a five year old that and having to grow up knowing your mother purposely drowned herself in work so she didn’t have to be anywhere near you,” you gave him a watery smile and Tony was confused about how you could be laughing in this moment.

“I mean she should really be thanking me, that’s how she got so many promotions, without me she wouldn’t have gotten that push, ya know?,” you shrug and look back in the fridge for something to snack on when you found a pudding cup.

“You can’t just lay all of that on someone and just act so casual, Y/N,” Tony was so perplexed by you. He thought your mom was confusing? It was a different story when it came to you.

“Yeah, I can. You can forget what I said just like you can forget everything that happened that night,” you scoop spoonful of pudding in your mouth.

“Is this because I was your first?,”

“That and because you’re my type. At first I thought I was just lusting after you because I hate my mom but then after a while I realized it was so much more than that. So much more.... then that night happened and I figured things were finally going my way but then she came back and had you wrapped around her finger all over again,”

“Y/N... what do you want me to do? I care about your mother-”

“Do you love her?,” you cut him off, you step closer to him and watch as he takes his glasses off

“Excuse me?,”

“I asked if you loved her. Does she make you feel wanted like I did?,” you take another step, “Make you feel like you’re the one thing that matters?,” another step closer.

“When you let her head rest on your chest and you close your eyes, is it her you see? Or is it my face you see? Is it me that crosses your mind?,”

Tony just stares as you, gnawing at the inside of his cheek as he thinks your questions through.

“Does she have any humor? Does she laugh at your jokes? Or is it none of my business?,” you arch a brow and smirk as you take yet another step and at this point you’re close up on him and whispering in his ear, “She doesn’t love you, like I do. She doesn’t have my name. She’ll never be the same because she is not me,”

You could hear Tony’s breathing and how he was trying to slow it down, he stared you down and turned to you, “And what about you, huh?,”

“Did you bring that man in here to make Daddy jealous?,” he crosses his arms and your bit your bottom lip as his intense glare made you feel small.

“N-no,” you swallow and stand taller

“Don’t lie to me, Y/N,”

“I was... I was hoping I could have a night with him to forget our night. Find something new,” you shrug, “And if you just so happened to find out then so be it,” you shrug your shoulders and he grabs your face in his hand just like he did that very night after he slapped you and had you wanting more.

“But do you really wanna forget?,” he squeezed your cheeks harder and had you whining at the feeling, “Did you really wanna forget everything Daddy did for you that night? The way he made you feel good, and had you sore? Begging for me to cum in you? You knew what you were doing because you wanted me to be the one and only deep inside you,” his other hand had already pushed down your bottoms and was working circles into your clothed clit.

“So tell me, did you really want to forget?,” he smiles at you as you shake your head no.

“I just want mom out of the picture. I want her gone so I can have you all to myself,” you admit, “She wouldn’t be hurt, she would just be onto the next. She doesn’t care about you like I do, Daddy. She doesn’t make you feel things like I do and we both know it,”

He clenched his jaw and picked you up to throw you over his shoulder and rush upstairs to your room. He threw you on the bed and you bounced on the mattress. Immediately undressing yourself as he did the same to himself, not taking his eyes off of you. Your pussy glistened back up at him like a body of water in the moonlight.

He dropped to his knees and pulled you close to the edge of the bed. Wasting no time, he stuck his tongue out to flick your clit. You smile lightly at the feeling, getting more of what you’ve been wanting. He wraps his lips around your clit, sucking like he was trying to get the last of his drink out of a cup with a straw.

“Oh, God yes,” you spread your legs wider and he moved his head side to side while moaning against you, creating vibrations that rushed through your body. He lapped up your juices that flowed and started to drip, not wanting to lose a single drop.

“Fuck,” he groaned to himself as he pushed two fingers in and you welcomed him as he was the one your body accommodated to. With his ring and middle finger pushed deep inside, he wrapped his other hand around your shaking thigh and watched as he finger fucked you and had you playing with your nipples and calling out for him in pleasure.

“So fucking goooood,” sitting up a little and still flicking and pinching your nipples, you watched his fingers move in and out of you, covered in your glaze, you saw the way he watched your pussy with his mouth hung open, ready to lick up all that you had to offer.

“I’m gonna fucking cum,” your head fell back as you moved your hips against his fingers. He went harder and that was your undoing. Your hips bucked up as you tightened around his fingers. He attached his mouth back to your dripping pussy, trying to work another orgasm out of you. You could hear the sucking and slurping of his mouth and you bit you lip hard and threaded your fingers in his hair.

“Daddy, please, again please,” you were panting and he held your thighs apart. His face was buried deep and his moans were bouncing off the walls right with yours.

“Cum for me like the good girl you are,” his voice was hoarse and he made eye contact with you as his tongue was swirling around your clit and inside of you.

“Shiiiit,” your legs shook in the air as you came for the second time that night, “Fuuck,” you sighed out and wiped your hairline from the small amount of sweat that had formed.

Tony pulled you up and slapped your cheek, “Open. Take Daddy in just like the first time,”

You had more of an idea what to do now. You took his cock in your hand and saw the way his tip was leaking, you loved how he wasn’t too big, but he was just the perfect size to fill you all the way up, whether it be your pussy or your throat. You sucked on the tip like your favorite blow pop and looked up at him from your spot on the bed. You pulled his cock up and attached your mouth to his balls, not quite sure knowing what you were doing but you felt like you were already bold as fuck tonight, so why not? You hollowed your cheeks as they moved around in your mouth and you had Tony’s legs shaking already.

You flicked your tongue on the seam and he threw his head back, “Yes, baby,”

You pull back and wrapped your lips around his length and started bobbing your head, loving the way he fit in your mouth. He has this vein that sat perfectly at the bottom of his cock and you ran your tongue against it, making Tony whine like a puppy.

“Love that wet mouth,” he grabbed the back of your head and started moving a bit faster, making you gag against him, knowing he loved it. He loved the way your throat constricted against his head and he found himself grinding his teeth when it happened, His face turned red in pleasure as you stared up at him.He withdrew himself and caught his breath.

“Turn around, lay flat” He twirls his finger and you do as he says. You feel him climb on the bed behind you and you felt him slap his cock against the crease of your ass cheeks. He spreads your legs and runs his head against your soaking lips.

“At first you were just a brat, but now you’re a selfish brat so Daddy is gonna fuck you like one. You want Daddy all to yourself? That’s what you’re getting,”

He pushed into you and you both groaned out at the feeling of each other, “Nice and tight just like the first time,” he whispers in your ear as e starts to move faster. He held your cheeks apart as he watched himself fuck you and your juices cover him just like the first time.

“Fuck, I love your pussy,” he slaps your ass cheek and fucked harder. You drop your head against your pillow and claw at the covers,

“I love it when you fuck me like that, Daddy,” you look over your shoulder and look at the mesmerized look on his face as your walls took him and wrapped around him nice and tight. He leaned forward and braced his arms by your head and lifted himself up to start pistoling his cock into you at a different angle and faster pace. You pounded your feet against the bed at the pleasure and bit into the pillow to keep from screaming, only for him to rip it away, “No, let me hear you,”

You were moaning your head off, not caring how loud you were. He pulled out and flipped you over and kept your legs spread as he reentered you, making your eyes roll in the back of your head, “Daddy, I’m gonna cum agaaain,”

“Do it,” he huffed, “Look at you creaming all over my dick,” he smiled down at where you two met.

“Oh my God,” you peered up at him and smiled, loving the view of him taking you, “I’m a good girl, right Daddy?,” your innocent puppy dog eyes were shining back up at him and had his dick twitching in you, making him fuck you harder until you were cumming all over him again, “Daddy!,”

“There goes my good girl,” his body started to glisten with sweat and he had his tongue sticking out as he concentrated on pleasing you. The moment he makes eye contact is the moment you come undone again. Your juices gushed out against him, making you call for him over and over as you became overwhelmed at the sensation. He leaned down and bit your bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth before letting it go to kiss you with all his might, tongue swirling, teeth clashing, moaning into each other’s mouths you closed your eyes as you felt yourself getting ready to cum yet again. You lost count on which number this would be, all that mattered was Tony.

“It’s okay, just keep taking me like the good girl I know you are,”

You gasped for air as he just kept fucking it out of you, cumming again. Tony picks you up and puts you in his lap, fucking up into you. Chest to chest, you rest your head in the crook of his neck as he was chasing his own orgasm. His pelvis was rubbing up against you sensitive clit and you feel yet another wave coming in, “That’s right, baby girl. Cum all over Daddy’s cock again. You’re gonna make me cum so hard, baby,” he bit into your shoulder as he leaned back a bit to thrust at a different angle.

At this point you were overwhelmed and were trying to keep from crying out. You were being turned out and you weren’t sure if you wanted it to stop or not. Tony kept kissing all over you as he whispered in your ear, “You’re fucking soaking. It feels so good. I’m about to cum so deep in that little pussy of yours,”

You wrap your arms around him tighter and scream for him, “Fuck, Daddy. Y-you feel so good, it’s too much,” you were shaking and whimpering on top of him but he just kept going. He pushes you back down and just when you think he’s about to slow down, he plays you and goes faster, knocking the wind out of you, you’re begging him to slow down because it’s so much, “I can’t take iiiit,”

“I told you I was fucking you like the selfish brat you were,” you moans into your ear and pins your hips down, going harder, making you scratch down him back and wrap your legs around him. You’re completely fucked out and can barely see straight as the tears of pleasure put a film over your eyes. Tony laughs at you and starts giving you long, deep strokes, “Fuck, princess. You’re so fucking wet and tight for me,”

“Daddy is turning you out and you can’t even handle it. I thought you wanted me all to yourself?,” He sucked and bit all over your neck, leaving marks and admiring them

“I do!,”

He wraps his hand around your throat as he pace starts to falter, “Then take Daddy’s cum,” his eyes start to flutter as he feels his climax coming fast.

“Leave her!,” you call out and tighten your walls around him “That’s what I want you to do. Cum deep in this pussy and leave her,”

“Okay, Yes! fuck yes, baby,” he grinds his hips into and you feel him fill you up, his moans fill up the room and you feel once last orgasm wash over you, leaving you both calling out for each other.

Tony falls over you and kisses the marks he left on your neck and you run your hands through his hair.

“Leave that guy alone and I’ll leave her,” Tony catches his breath and runs his thumb over your softening nipple, “And don’t ever try to bring another man in this house,”

“Yes, Daddy,”

----------

WHEW, I just... love Tony omfg. I hope you guys enjoyed this part just ask much! if you do please don’t forget to leave feedback and reblog :)

Tags- @mbaku-babygirl @vozit @babybubastis @yournonlocalpoc @chonisberonica @majikmelanin @blowmymbackout @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @spideys-wife @mokacoconut @livayah @mirajanestrauss1999 @curlyhairclub @fromlia-withlove @sideeffectsofyou @crawlingnightmares @amethyst-dreams-and-candy-canes @whothehellisbinky @scarletlingeries @misstoryunfolded @thevanishedillusion @whorderofthepheonix

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miss-mishka · 4 years

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The Old Guard (Image, 2017) vs Youth (comiXology, 2020): A Completely Biased Comparison

I don’t really know what this is, kind of a crack review, because I had more to say about these two recent reads than I could fit in my Goodreads reviews. So it will be a long read if you opt to proceed. Be warned: ADULT LANGUAGE BEYOND THE CUT, I make no promises that my words will be coherent throughout & sarcasm will abound as I discuss two mini/limited issue comic series’ that I’ve recently bought into.

They are:

1)The Old Guard, 2017 Image Comics 5 issue miniseries release, written by Greg Rucka, illustrated by Leandro Fernandez

Main cast, above, left to right: Sebastien le Livre aka Booker; Nile Freeman (no alias, currently); Andromache the Scythian aka Andy; Nicolo di Genova aka Nicky; Yusuf al-Kaysani aka Joe. Noriko is also a related, but not pictured, character.

2) Youth, 2020 comiXology Original 4 issue miniseries, written by Curt Pires, art by Alex Diotto

Main cast, above, from left to right: River, Jan, Kurt, Frank. Trixy is also a main character, but not featured on this group cover. (That wasn’t deliberate on my part. Since it’s a new series, I wanted a cover shot to help you if you want to shop for the series & this was the only one with most of the group clearly visible.)

So now let’s get to some plot.

The Old Guard is a group of warriors that are much harder to keep dead that your average person. Their ages range from Andy, estimated over 6,000 years old, to Nile, 27 per issue #4. The hows & whys of their ability to recover from injuries up to & including death, are completely unknown, but the ability can end with the same lack of understanding as it began. Andy has found 6 others like her in her time on Earth. 1 has died.

Youth is the teenaged couple Frank & River running away from their home town, meeting up with the older teenaged, possibly early 20s,trio that comprises rest of their group. While fleeing cops, drunk & high after a party, the group’s van is struck by what appears to be a meteor. It does, but doesn’t kill them. They each get a special power from it & all can suddenly fly.

Their enemy/obstacle/villain:

For The Old Guard, it’s big pharma bro Steve Merrick; his security chief, former CIA agent & the one who led Merrick to Andy’s team, James Copley; and the ‘mad’ scientist Dr. Ivan.

For Youth, this is it. Bootleg Nick Fury and the government resources at his disposal. (Take note, this is the one clear win that Youth has over ToG. I love & want more Don.)

Relationships:

Joe & Nicky

Andy & Noriko

Frank & River

Frank & Trixy (just hooking up to help ruin the actual relationship above)

While both comics have their group dynamics, they also have a clear gay couple at the center of their storylines. For The Old Guard, it’s Joe & Nicky. For Youth, it’s Frank & River. But Frank seems to be questioning, as he’s drawn to his new female acquaintance, Trixy. Kurt & Jan also seem attracted to Trixy, but the relationships between those three are not explored in these issues. River is most definitely immune to Trixy. So, Frank & River fall into the dysfunctional relationship category while Joe & Nicky, together over 900 years, are #RelationshipGoals.

So what’s the 411?:

For The Old Guard, Andy, Booker, Joe & Nicky sign on for a job from Copley to rescue some kidnapped schoolkids. Izza traaaaaaaaaaap! While the team decides to go on the offensive & track Copley down after he’s learnt their secret, Nile is killed in action only to find that she’s one of the ones that don’t stay dead easily. Andy goes to retrieve the new ‘recruit,’ the first since Booker in 1812, while the guys go to a safehouse to search for Copley. When Andy & Nile finally arrive at that location, they find Booker recovering from severe injuries while Joe & Nicky have been taken. It becomes a rescue mission for their captured brothers in addition to the seek & destroy goals for Copley. Along the way, Booker & Nile bond. Andy’s a tougher nut to crack. While Booker tries to locate their targets, Joe & Nicky are being tortured by the mad Doctor “for science” in hopes of discovering a profitable immortality drug for Merrick’s biz. Booker conveniently finds the whole Merrick operation taking place in Dubai, so off they go for their rescue mission & revenge. But...well, IZ ZA TRAP! Booker’s done with this undying thing & has sold the team out to see if Dr. Ivan can cure him of life while using the others to defeat death. Andy & Nile, though, aren’t helpless lil ladies. Neither are Joe & Nicky. With rescue under way, Joe & Nicky convince the doctor to let them go, then kill him, then find the others, meet Nile for the first time, kill Merrick as one happy new family, take off for Malta(yeah, in the comics, they’re THERE again), vote Booker off their island for 100 years & then leave him alone to be found by one very salty Noriko - she’s well-brined after 500 years in the ocean & batshit insane, to boot. That’s the first of three arcs planned for this group. About 160 pages over the 5 issues & not a panel wasted, in my opinion.

For Youth, River’s got a lousy step-dad, Frank has a lousy job; together they hate their town & lives, but maybe kind of love each other. So River says let’s steal my stepdad’s cherished old Mustang & run off for California. The car gets a flat, but there’s no spare to replace it & they ran away with no money because they’re teenagers. While broken down in a Walmart parking lot, the car draws the attention of Kurt, who grew up learning some mechanical stuff, appreciating the classics & is willing to offer help. Upon hearing that it’s a flat tire & the couple has no means to replace it, the decision is made to torch the car (it’s a Mustang, HOW DARE YOU?!) & get into the van with Kurt & his two female travelling companions. The five barely exchange names before they’re off to a party where alcohol & drugs mix to make Frank & Trixy horny for one another. River sees them making out & starts to leave when the cops show up to raid the party with all it’s underage & illegal happenings. River, such a sweetheart, is ready to leave Frank & Trixy to be arrested, but Kurt makes sure they all get away together in the van. A high (emphasis on high cause Kurt did some cocaine at the party) speed chase ensues with just a little awkwardness among the group as they realize that Frank & River were together & Trixy only kind of cares that she was pulled into their mess. Before there can be arguments, hairpulling slapfights or other drama over the man, the speeding vehicle is demolished by a meteor slamming to Earth. Except it may have been aliens? In issue #2 we see this:

After this faceoff, these celestial beings go at it, destroy what appears to be their home planet & create the space debris that hits the van & gives the youths powers. It totally killed Jan for a little bit, but that’s ok because Jan has the best powers. She came back from death & can track other powered people without Prof X’s massive Cerebro setup, which is handy when you’ve got Bootleg Nick Fury tracking you down because of the ‘anomaly’ that hit you. Trixy? She’s got a temper. When Don Thunder descends upon them with a small army of soldiers, Trixy turns them into twisted piles of gore and metal. I’m not sure what she did, but it was messy. I imagine in a movie the squish, crack, snap, pop, burst & splat sound effects would reign in that moment. With that dealt with, the group makes plans for what they should do next. Which is apparently, rob an armored truck (can anyone guess whose idea it was?) because they have no money for food or lodging. The heist does not go to plan because the guard driving the armored truck is distracted so he doesn’t see River standing in the road trying to stop the vehicle until the newly powered kid STOPS the vehicle. I’m pretty sure the guards, especially the driver whom they made sure we knew had a pregnant wife, are dead. Frank’s upset about this, blames River, who honestly could have flown off as soon as he realized that the truck wasn’t stopping as planned & the now very strong River smacks Frank into a wall. This pairing is not destined for 900 years together, I imagine Yusuf would continuously chop off his hand rather than strike Nicolo in a non-fun & consensual way. But the Youth gang still grabs some money bags and flies off. While multiple people capture it on their cell phones. Modern technology is an enemy to both the Youth & Old Guard. The kids take their money & go party. Alcohol & drugs again. Frank & Trixy making out again. This time when River sees his man with the girl, he declares the relationship over & storms out of the club. Killing a few people & knocking a sizable hole in the building to fly off while Frank freaks out & Trixy realizes this guy might be too much drama for her edgy self. We’re at the end of issue #3 which closes with this gem:

The more you know, right? Issue #4 has Don recovering from his injuries after Trixy’s finishing move failed to eliminate him (Dictionary: fore*shad*ow, verb: be a warning or indication of (a future event)). He sees video of the armored truck robbery on the news (O! these pesky kids with their cell phone cameras & viral videos) & he’s back on the hunt for the gang. River’s gone back home to the place he always went to to be alone when his stepdad was too much to deal with at home. Frank finds him there, because he had been shown that spot. It was their spot. It’s a sweet reunion where Frank still loves River despite the carnage so long as River still loves Frank with the cheating. A win-win lost-lost. And our Bootleg Nick Fury has his remaining eye on the lovebirds & is ready to attack! Jan, Kurt & Trixy see breaking news of the fight Frank & River put up against the government goons & Trixy is outvoted by the other two that they’ll go help their acquaintances of like 48 hours. The time they take deciding & getting there, though, puts them unfashionably late. Frank is seriously injured causing River to go Dark Phoenix so that the others can get Frank to safety. It fades to black, skips forward 3 months & implies that Frank’s going it alone in California where he was meant to be with River, but River is gone. (So obviously not dead, but captured by Thunder who clearly has his own powers because River’s Phoenix fire definitely didn’t kill this Superspy.) But Trixy’s all consoling and explains how Jan is locating other kids with powers - posthumans, they’re called - all around the world & they’ve decided to start searching for them to create a bigger group. Frank says it’s like the X-Men, but Jan isn’t quite Xavier level leader, so I say more New Mutants. Frank declines to be part of it. Trixy leaves him on a nice, sunny beach & goes to find Jan who portals them here, the most obviously “Not X like” structure in the world for their not a Bootleg X-Men/New Mutants series to take place in in the future:

(JFC, the colors alone are classic Wolverine! Originality. Did you maybe want to try that with this series?)

For the end of “Season 1″ of Youth, which implies there will be more. The single issues of the 4 part mini account for 125 pages & I consider several of those pages wasted.

Final Verdict:

With powerhouse publishers like DC & Marvel having decades worth of this content, Youth was entering a very crowded arena. The only thing it focused on as a lure to draw attention from the big leagues was the relationship between Frank & River, but representation has come a long way & Youth needed more. More story development, more group dynamics, more SOMETHING. Because I read the series in a world where I now know that The Old Guard exists & what Greg Rucka did with that series in simple & overt representation is a master class that Curt Pires needs to attend before any 2nd season talk for Youth. The world, my world, is ready for immortal gays. We’ve seen it, we need more. If River’s still alive, as I suspect, then there’s potential, but it shouldn’t magically erase all the issues that Frank & River had as a couple. They are not anywhere near the level of Joe & Nicky. And if/when Youth returns it needs to focus on the characters that we’re supposed to engage with & keep the focus on ALL OF THEM. Comics take art, with or without words, to tell some incredibly entertaining & complex stories. Don’t waste the space on blackness & block quotes, no matter what Marlon Brando is doing with mailboxes. Create the visuals & worlds in your head & tell the story with your heart so it comes to life for all of us. That’s what Rucka did with The Old Guard & I want to see more writers, artists & publishers striving to attain that level for us. I’m spoiled to it now & you can expect this kind of insanity from me if you fail to reach for this bar.

If you cannot tell by the end of all this, I am completely biased in favor of The Old Guard & if you can afford it, but haven’t done so yet, BUY THE BOOKS! Youth gets points for effort & dragged for everything else.

#comic review #youth (comixology)#the old guard #sleep deprevation does this to me

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painandpleasure86 · 5 years

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Happy at home (again)

A/N: Hi there ppl! I never participated in a ship week like this time… Thank u Mel aka @roger-taylors-🚗 for hosting this special week ❤️ Now, the final chapter!! Sorry if haves a lot of mistakes... I wanted to post it before it was midnight in Europe lmao.

This little DeazelloNeighbors'AU haves the previous chapters:

Ch #1 “My new neighbor it’s my crush”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190777536948/my-new-neighbor-its-my-crush-deazzello-week

Ch #2 “Gimme your comfort, I suffer of 💛”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190796228203/gimme-your-comfort-i-suffer-of-💛-deazello

Ch #3 “Life-changing decisions (and a lot of suspects)”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190811616233/life-changing-decisions-a-lot-of-suspects Ch #4 “I Cannot Believe It’s True”: https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190840736228/i-cannot-believe-its-true

Ch #5 “Being Happy Isn’t Against All Odds” : https://painandpleasure86.tumblr.com/post/190859515793/being-happy-isnt-against-all-odds

And this time, I took the prompt Kids and Holiday

Summary: rebuilding the family it’s possible!! <3 Also a nice surprise it’s coming...

Warning: Fluff, pure cuteness and happiness!

Word count: +1200

Permanent taglist: @warriorteam1924 @toomuchlove-willkillyou @deakysgurl (if you want to be in this list, send me a msg or ask)

If you liked it, please reblog! That will help me to reach to more ppl :3 Soon I’ll post a masterlist of this little AU <3

************************

August 19th, 1995

Was John's 44th birthday. A moment to celebrate a lot of things. Happiness. Life. The successful divorce thing. The nice relationship that finally had again Ronnie and Joe. Was hard to her, but she could do it. For her children. For John too… because she never ended to love him. She decided to be single and dedicate to her children, also in to be teacher again. She found happiness in her children. In the coexistence. She understood that sometimes God's plans are strange. Perhaps that was the way to make her to work again as a teacher. And that her ex husband can be happy again.

For that occasion, the weekly meeting was in Saturday and no in Sunday as was an habit in the family. It was sometimes in Ronnie's house, sometimes in John's house (the one that's next to Joe's parent house). The kids were too happy to meet everyone at the same time, have a nice time and share a delicious meal. Sometimes were also Robert or even Joe's parents. Joe's dad still don't accept at all the choices of his son, but slowly it's going for the accepting way.

The birthday party started early, so the kids could enjoy of the pool almost all day long. And that Saturday was sunny.

Ronnie, Julia (John's sister) and Joe worked together in the meal preparing. Occasionally the kids also helped them.

Meanwhile this happened, Laura was to her room and grabbed her diary to write an entry.

Dear Diary,

Today it's Dad's Birthday, that's means that Michael, Josh and me we're meeting my youngest brothers. They're with my mom. Thanks to God we live in the same neighborhood, but isn't the same. I'm happy for Dad, because he's happy with Joe. But isn't mom here… I miss her breakfasts. Anyways, Joe it's a great stepdad. Sometimes haves problems because Dad loves cheese but Joe it's lactose intolerant… but they resolve the problems quickly.

Also are Joe’s parents and my aunt Julia with their offspring. We are a lot of people here! I love to have a lot of family really <3

Well… I should leave here. Joe's calling me! I hope that wasn't to help in the kitchen...

Laura

Joe precisely asked for help to prepare the meal. He needed to change diapers to Cameron, he still weared it sometimes. John couldn't because he was taking care of Luke meanwhile he was talking with their future mother and father in law.

They enjoyed a delicious meal. Also everyone enjoyed of the pool when they considered was opportune.

When, at 6 pm, was time to sing the Happy birthday, John was beyond happy. His family was there. His future husband was there with his ex wife. His sister and his nieces/nephews. His mom. Even Joe's parents. He was happy at home again…

He blew the candles quickly, so his sister asked "and your three wishes?"

"Really… I have all I want. I have my family, I have happiness… Well. Not everything. The fans still bothers me for pics. Hahaha"

"Well next weekend nope, love" said Joe hugging him. With Ronnie we were talking about a little trip to Disneyland París with the kids. Obviously if you want."

"Are you kidding me?" Of course I want!" he hugged to his couple.

The kids were so happy, even Cameron giggled excited. "We will go to Disney, Cam!" said his mom to the baby, that were in her arms.

Leaving the embrace, Joe said "Okey, next announcement… I have the role!!!"

Everyone was happy. Finally he have a main role in the next movie of a super important director.

Josh was to greet him with their thing of redhead power

"MY REDHEAD DAD HAVES A MAIN ROLE!" screamed watching to everyone. "You're the best!" and hugged Joe tightly.

"And me?" asked John pretending to be sad.

"You too Dad. But you're already famous. Now I'll have two famous Dads!" exclaimed Josh hugging both men.

Trying to speak, Joe continued...

"I must to thanks to Ronnie… thanks to her I had the role… the main character it's a musician… Come here Ronnie!" and he hugged her, still having Cameron in her arms.

"Little bud!" Joe exclaimed caressing Cam's head.

"Dad" said the baby pointing at him.

"I'm not your dad, he's your dad" said Joe,pointing to John.

But the toddler continued saying "Dad" to Joe.

Cameron had already humor sense.

----------

July 25th, 2014

Holidays together. Something that both needed. Joe finally could rest of all the press tour for his new movie, which haves a little participation of John. He didn't wanted that, but for Joe's insistence, he contributed with the soundtrack. Both are having finally time to theirselves.

They're in Japan, one of the favorite places of John.

That month, more precisely July 25th, it's their official anniversary but this time the annual holidays to Japan were slightly different…

-----------------

Meanwhile John was taking a bath, Joe left a little message over the bed.

"I have a special gift to you. Come at the hotel cafeteria dressed with a suit and you will know what's".

love, Joey.

He, when saw that, choose a nice suit and put a lot of his favorite cologne in his neck. He combed his almost bald head. He cleaned his glasses. He shaved his face. And also put a nicotine patch in his right hand, because Joe didn't liked a lot that John smokes when they're together.

When he came to the cafeteria, was in darkness.

"What the f-"

And a light turned on. Was one over Joe's head.

"Okay, another of his numbers… hahaha I love you Joseph" thought John, smiling.

"Come here" Joe said.

John sat in the table, without knowing what happened.

All the lights were on. And he saw the gift…

Everyone in the cafeteria were accomplices of the big surprise. They were holding parts of a big sign, that said "Will you marry me John?"

He was speechless.

"J-joey…"

Joe was in his knees, taking John's right hand, watching at that greenish eyes.

"YEAH, I WANT!" screamed John.

Everyone was cheering.

Joe puts a ring in John’s ring finger of his right hand and he stood up. Watching to John's eyes, he said: "We have a civil union, but since now we will can marry. So.." and was interrupted with a kiss in his lips.

Everyone cheered even harder.

"Love wins!" screamed a boy

"Love is love boys!" shouted a trans girl.

"You will be happy at home again Deaky!" screamed a Queen fan that was over there.

They laughed.

Hugging with his left arm to Joe, John said: "I'm already happy… but now more because officially I'll can call to this man MY HUSBAND very soon!" And he kissed Joe's lips again. "Thank you for help to Joe! Min'na arigato" and hugged to Joe again with both arms.

His smile it's so big. He deserved to be happy. And if it's possible happier. They passed a lot of things together. They suffered, they argued... but they mainly are happy. And John was happy knowing that he will live his final years with his lovely Joe.

<3 FIN <3

*****************************

I had a lot of fun writing this!!! This was my first fic series, so, it’s great to have this experience and more in this special ship week!! I hope can bring to you more fic series and one shots soon!

If you want more of this AU, just request it!! It’s a whole world and I just told a tiny piece of it in this special week...

Yours sincerely,

Lily.

#painandpleasure86 fics #deazzelloweek2020 #john deacon #joe mazzello #veronica tetzlaff #laura deacon #family #japan #queen fic #queen fanfiction #neighbor au #neighbors #queen fluff

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hellyeahomeland · 5 years

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“Catch and Release”: an HYH recap

LOL I guess we need to discuss these new opening credits? It’s a real throwback, incorporating some of the more famous images from the first few years of the show, especially young Carrie (also I don’t remember the maze as much the last few years but it was there, and it features heavily this year as well).

Some notable audio clips:

Saul: You had a relationship complicated enough to lie about. Carrie: Yeah, it’s complicated! I lost seven months of my life!

Saul: You will become the focus of an investigation that will define the rest of your life.

Saul: Please God, tell me you haven’t…

(had to include this cap because I’m trash)

So… this should be fun.

The episode opens right where the last one left off. Carrie is visibly disturbed by the site of Yevgeny walking out of G’ulom’s office. She wastes no time asking G’ulom what the hell they were doing there. He plays coy and says they’re just businessmen but Carrie is doing her whole righteous indignation, “New Car Smell” thing. She says he’s got to take back his comments about the POWs. There’s a pointed exchange where Carrie says they’re prisoners of war and G’ulom counters that they’re terrorists and OH MY GOD how much heavier could the Brody parallels get?? Anyway, G’ulom is very unconvinced by Carrie’s argument, which basically boils down to “please?” She seethes the whole way back to the CIA station and says her first mean thing to Jenna this episode.

Later on the phone with Saul, she asks if he knew Yevgeny was there. “Of course not,” Saul says, though I’m not really sure I believe him. But apparently they can’t do shit about this as it was part of the terms of Carrie’s release. Which I guess they forgot to mention in her debrief.

Elsewhere in Afghanistan, Max is talking to the DoD’s version of Siri. His Hot Marines give him all a hair tousle, which he hates (obviously), but which also seems to be some sign of good luck. The nice guy in the hat from the last episode notably does not touch his head, so I’m sure he’ll be dead in 2-4 episodes. Apparently the DoD Siri is better than the real thing because he manages to comb through some conversations of Haqqani talking to his son about ending the war. Saul says this is “black and white” evidence, because as we know everything that happens on this show is “black and white.” He’s convinced that if he could just talk to Haqqani, they could end this war together. This is one of Saul’s more insane plans but it will probably work because: Saul.

Back at the CIA, Carrie’s gotten an “anonymous tip” which is basically a name written in large block letters inside an envelope. She manages to use a computer successfully and discovers the name is of a woman who was involved in a government corruption probe that got ~mysteriously~ shut down when it uncovered actual government corruption. How quaint! Anyway, then her husband was killed in a car bomb that was probably meant for her. So she’s justifiably pissed and probably has dirt on G’ulom that Carrie could use.

Carrie proposes to Mike Dunne an operation wherein they pretend to interview her for a job while Carrie breaks into her apartment to find said dirt. Mike Dunne brilliantly suggests Jenna for the operation since apparently Jenna set up a fake NGO with all her downtime on account of not being let outside. Their conversation goes something like this:

Carrie: Wait, just last week you told me Jenna is sort of an idiot. Mike: I said she was stuck in the starting gate. That is a horse racing analogy. Carrie: [raises eyebrows] Mike: We need her idiocy to add a little drama to this otherwise straightforward operation you’ve devised.

Later, Carrie prepares with Jenna:

Carrie: I’m phrasing this next bit as a rhetorical question with an obvious answer, because I don’t actually believe you know the right answer, because you are an idiot. Jenna: I promise I’m not an idiot. Did Mike say I was a fuck-up? Carrie: No, I said that. Jenna: Oh, right. Carrie: Are you not a fuck-up? Jenna: [blank stare]

Meanwhile, Tasneem is observing the transfer of Taliban POWs from Guantanamo, including one who is carted off on a stretcher. Also Saul is nowhere to be found. Between the ambulance and the “where the FUCK is Saul” of it all, this scene has several of the same elements of the iconique ending of “A Red Wheel Barrow.” Like Carrie then, Tasneem knows something is fishy.

…and something definitely is! Saul’s not back in America like Tim Guinee says. He’s with Haqqani’s cousin, one of the released POWs, trying to convince him to hand deliver a letter to Haqqani in exchange for his immediate freedom.

Saul and Haqqani’s cousin arrive in Peshawar, where Saul hands over the letter to Haqqani, which he then reads via voiceover. It’s all very “A False Glimmer.” He pleads with Haqqani to meet with him, claiming “it’s only the men with guns who can make peace.” Which, I guess?

The next day, Carrie’s operation is a go. Samira leaves right on time for the interview with Jenna’s fake NGO and Carrie and her crew easily break into her apartment. They don’t find much, until Carrie notices a burqa with a USB sewn into the hem. Incriminating evidence sewn into fabric that is discovered at the last moment is my FAVORITE device on this show.

Carrie is victorious in her search but Jenna royally fucks up the interview, because she’s an idiot (and a fuck-up, apparently), revealing that she knows about the “audit” Samira took part in. Jenna, you literally had one job! To her credit, Samira realizes what’s going on almost instantly and then takes a photo of Jenna. We have to stan!!

Samira doesn’t get away though. They abduct her and take her back to the CIA station, cuff her, and throw a hood over her head. Carrie is enraged, claiming they’ve just traumatized her all over again and now she definitely won’t talk. After a few seasons of getting a hood thrown over her head, Carrie sympathizes.

She does her best “here’s the lay of the land” with Samira and gets her to tell her the significance of the documents on the USB drive. Samira wants G’ulom arrested and says she can wait two more years, or even twenty, to take down G’ulom. Carrie knows the best they can do is just cut him at the knees by advancing the peace deal. In the end, she convinces her.

Carrie calls Saul from a big abandoned building, location unknown, which is supposed to be an army base. Key phrase: “supposed to be.” Samira’s documents show evidence of an entirely fabricated Afghan Army battalion. That’s right, G’ulom is a scammer! He’s been funneling millions of dollars meant for the Army base into his own pocket for years. Incredulous, Carrie exclaims, “We’ve been enabling this motherfucker for 18 years! What is wrong with us?”

In Rawalpindi, Tasneem pays a visit to her retired stepfather Bunny (last seen in season four). He’s fallen asleep in his massive garden shooting squirrels with a pistol. The neighbors are complaining.

Tasneem: If you took down the bird feeders, the squirrels would stop eating the bird seeds. Bunny: I prefer this. Also, that’s not fair to the birds. Tasneem: Is this a metaphor? [Later] Tasneem: Stepdad, I think Saul is up to no good. If he talks to Haqqani directly, there could be a real breakthrough. Bunny: Unacceptable. We must control everything. Tasneem: How far am I allowed to go then? Bunny: The Americans hate us and our God. Go as fucking far as you please. Tasneem: Coolio, it’s murder time.

Wearing a nice set of gold bar earrings, Carrie is back in G’ulom’s office, presenting him with a slew of incriminating evidence about his scam. He has two hours to walk back the statements before she shares the papers with his own government, who’d likely have him killed. Finally she has leverage, but G’ulom still manages to give a menacing speech about how peace will be terrible for everyone. Carrie doesn’t relent.

Poor Max has not gotten any alone time at the Army base in Afghanistan, but he has realized that the ISI definitely know that Saul is in Peshawar. Apparently the Taliban does as well. Twist of twists, the ISI aren’t preparing to hit him, they’re preparing to hit Haqqani. Saul yells at the Taliban’s convoy to stop but it’s too late. Amid the panic, Saul is abducted again. I honestly cannot. How many times has this been? This was not the Homeland Greatest Hits I had in mind.

Later, Carrie is stomping her way through the streets of Kabul. She ends up at a bar with the rest of the crew. She says something encouraging to Jenna and orders a “soda water,” both of which are not things I would have expected Carrie to do. Mike Dunne is like, Carrie when the fuck are you gonna leave? Carrie does a cute lil’ shrug and randomly asks where the bathroom is.

That’s right, we needed Carrie alone and somewhat lost because YEVGENY IS BACK. Somehow he looks even hotter than last week. Apparently he gave the anonymous tip, which makes no sense.

Yevgeny: I thought you were gonna thank me. *wink wink* Carrie: I am so confused. Yevgeny: Who else would have done something so nice for you? *wink wink* Carrie: I am maximum confused. Yevgeny: Don’t play dumb. *wink wink* Carrie: I am more confused now than that time I saw a screensaver. Yevgeny: Hey, maybe we could go to Banana Joe’s together? *wink wink* [fades into darkness]

The episode closes somewhat awesomely with Saul, still blindfolded, entering a cement fortress. The blindfold comes off, his beard looks raggedy. I’ve seen this all before. Haqqani walks in. He’s not dead. Saul’s thanking the heavens, and then Haqqani smacks him across the face with a rifle. Cut to black. *chef’s kiss*

#homeland #an hyh recap #catch and release #*#by: sara

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mapulaski-blog · 4 years

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highermagic · 5 years

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what happens in the novella for In The Tall Grass, what happens and makes it good to you. what is it's real title?

Its real title is also ‘In the Tall Grass’. It was co-written by Joe Hill and Stephen King (who are father & son). So you know, like, he’s already got kind of an edge. King makes his living writing scary/spooky shit, and Hill definitely has his own brand of ‘what the *fuck*’ kind of vibe in his stories. Them writing it together is pretty much a guarantee for some spooky, trippy, spine-tingling shit.

For other references, Joe also wrote (among other things) N0S4A2 (which is a TV show coming out right now/soon), My Father’s Mask (which is what I know him from and therefore recognize his trippy writing), Horns (which was adapted into that Daniel Radcliffe movie).

Now, without further ado, spoilers!

The novella doesn’t have time repeats/skips. Almost everyone dies. Travis doesn’t exist.

The plot in regards to Becky and Cal remains pretty much the same (lured in by Tobin, 911 call, meeting Ross), but Becky actually kills Ross when he brings her to the rock and stabs him to death with her keys which is pretty badass imo, before she has the baby.

Cal actually makes efforts to just fucking get out by burning the field, but it’s too wet to burn. Cal is more than just a means for tension as he was made to be in the movie.

Cal meets Tobin towards the end of the book and touches the rock. He’s half-insane and that, ah, one scene post-birth is more obviously what the movie hinted at, only it’s Cal and feral!Tobin doing it. Becky ends up thrown on the rock and presumably dying

At the end, more people show up outside the grass, pause, hear Tobin, and get led inside.

I prefer the novella for a few different reasons:

1: Implies that it’s not actually about any of them. The grass will lure whoever it wants. The movie made it seem like it had to be Becky/Cal/Ross/Tobin etc, when that’s just not true, or at least not as heavily relied-upon as a narrative device in the novella.

2: No time cycles. I was actually talking with my stepdad about it and I realized that the more I think about it the more it makes me mad, lol. There’s nothing in the book that suggests it *which means* there was no narrative basis for adding it *except* to make the movie longer/supposedly more creepy (which, yeah, walking onto your own body is creepy, but hardly any of them do it??)

I’ve talked about the implicit 1:1 ratio but GUESS WHAT guys if the grass doesn’t move dead things and they kept ‘making the same mistakes’ to the point where Cal and Travis all kept dying in the same places, don’t you think there’d be more dead Freddys? Natalies? Tobins? Beckys? There should be, if you’re going to assert that it’s a never-ending time loop then there would definitely be more dead bodies.

3: The grass men were talked about in the book but to my recollection never actually showed up which a) more creepy, better and b) made it less supernatural horror and relied more on the psycho thriller which imo is Hill’s strong suit.

I am NOT saying the movie was bad. I genuinely enjoyed it, it’s just that there are extra things added that just don’t make it as...neat? Sometimes horror should just be linear, about a shifting maze that keeps people trapped inside it. Like I don’t need time loops to enjoy that.

Just given what I know of Hill’s work, and not seeing much indication that he had any part in the adaptation, I just feel like it would have been better had he or King been involved, if for NO other reason than to be like ‘so, yeah, these time loops.........we gotta figure that shit out’.

Idk when I became the Tall Grass oracle but I hope that helps!

#in the tall grass #ittg spoilers #also I want a hannigram au of it #surprising no one #Anonymous #so i married an ask murderer

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blue-eyed-bloodstains · 2 years

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What is your Starbucks order? or any coffee shop order? (: iced: Hazelnut, hot: caramel macchiato What is your dream vacation? Anywhere with him, as cliche as that sounds,,,but in general, location wise? any island, meaning Hawaii/Bahamas/Keys/Barbados etc. Would you ever go on a game show? Which one? Whose Line Is It Anyway and Family Feud What TV show character do you relate to most? hmmm too hard to choose cause I’m pieces of so many over the years... If you had to choose to be an animal, what would you be and why? As much as I’d love to say dog or cat for many reasons for both individually, I’d have to say a bird or something that can fly given my history of moving around so much most of which was under 18 so I had no choice aka forced to so...that freedom to go where I want when I want and to enjoy it...

When was the last time you wore a dress/suit? Dress and it was September 2020 for one of my best friend’s wedding Have you ever been to Tennessee, USA? no Do you prefer more mellow music or loud? depends on the mood/mindset at the moment Do you get along well with your family? haha trick question? again depends on the current situation and also who it is...it’s different with different members of family When was the last time you played in the snow, if ever? oh god idk...mid 2000′s in the townhouse probably Are you clumsy? always Does anyone you know have a birthday coming up soon? nope just hit 30 in May so lol Do you ever go bowling? omg I love that this is a question cause this was part of the “3 part” first date with Zach, we started with bowling and that was our first kiss (not literally, just us together I mean) not as much as I wish we could, but we try to every now and then so maybe like once a year

Have you ever worn a wig? nope Do you enjoy musicals? I mean...I’ve only ever seen movie ones, I’d love to see an actual theater one so yeah I do just don’t have experience of them lol What shoes did you wear today? I’ve been in the house all day so none Do you enjoy 60’s music? umm I don’t really know much but I love music of all genres/generations so I’m sure if I heard some I’d love it so yeah Do you know anyone who is a great drummer? no but I wish I was Would you rather watch or play sports? both, I’ve played basketball/field hockey during school Does your name have a meaning behind it? Morgan (first name) - The name Morgan means "sea-born," "sea-song," or "sea-circle." It is traditionally a boy's name of Welsh origin, and more specifically, a variant of the Old Welsh name Morcant which is a combination of the Welsh elements mor, meaning "sea" and cant, meaning "circle." Isabelle (first middle name) - my great grandmother’s name who I never got to meet...she died before I was born Lynn (second middle name) - generational middle name, aka my mom has this as her middle name as well hence how I got it Karch (....fuck off...last name) - sperm donor’s last name, my grandma aka Mimi told my mom to give me his last name after I was born while we were still in the hospital...can’t wait for my wedding to my fiance to take his last name Wilson since all my life even past 18 aka legal so adoption name wise couldn’t happen anymore I wanted Joe (stepdad since I was 6 months old who IS MY DAD) to give me his last name but never happened...anyway ahem Do you have a certain brand you are very loyal to? not really cause I’ve never been that kinda person and even if I was, never had the money for any brand but if I had to pick? Baby Phat for sure Are you too short for the sun visor in the car to work properly for you? I’m 6′0 but the sun is an asshole so even with the visors down it still blinds me at certain times lol Do you have a favorite planet? ummm not really? I love learning about all of them though How often do you spend time on Bzoink? never heard of it What did you last have to drink? iced Hazelnut coffee from Wawa and omfg how I wish it was an actual “drink” cause I could use one right now... What type of movies are you most amused by? depends on the movie so a lot What is your sense of humor like? dry, pervy, sarcastic, dark...think Ron White for the most of it :P Are you materialistic? hell no I hate that Do you listen more with your heart, mind, or stomach? all of the above every single time no matter the situation/circumstances What are some thing that fascinate you? hmmm...that’s hard to list so I’ll just say a lot of things Do you suffer from any diseases? hahahaha!!! many, let’s put it that way... Have you ever broken a bed? no Have you ever worked in retail? yep several times, several different jobs in it as far as what I did and never EVER again! :I What’s the strangest food combination you’ve seen someone eat? I really haven’t but as far as something strange I can think of? hawaiian pizza...no. I love pizza, I love pineapple, but get the fuck out of here with pineapple ON the pizza. fuckin eww. no. wrong. Do you pick up on others feelings easily? hell yeah What is your current mood? numb and anxious as fuck at the same time...fun right? Do you prefer shopping online or in store? both but given my anxiety disorders online is easier What did you last remember dreaming about? oh dear god my dreams this last few weeks have been fuckin intense, insane, triggering....I need a good restful sleep and I can’t get it cause of the damn dreams What’s your favorite condiment? dipping - ketchup salad - ranch, balsamic vinaigrette

What is the last thing you borrowed? my fiance’s headphones so I could jam and not wake him up while he was sleeping When was the last time you took a group picture? Christmas, my stepmom’s family which included me and my fiance in it Name the first person who pops in your head whose name starts with T. Tyler (an ex) Is there a song or songs you can rap all the lyrics to? oh lord lol yeah quite a bit, mostly Eminem including the freestyle battles from 8 Mile without even needing the movie playing or even having them playing on Youtube :P Have you hugged anyone today? I wish..he’s in St. Louis on a job so I can’t... What did you last watch on TV? House M.D reruns If your last words were the last message you received, what would they be? “Okay money is sent” - from my fiance cause I needed some funds while he’s gone to Doordash dinner and stuff (don’t ask, he’s the only income....not explaining) Are you good at keeping secrets? always What last disappointed you? me, always every single day If you could see a concert of any celebrity who has passed away.. who would you like to see? definitely Linkin Park with Chester, no questions asked How many blankets do you own? a few What was your favorite food as a child? pretty much anything, never been real picky with food so Do you like denim shorts? hell yeah What was the last picture you looked at? my cousin’s fiance on FB, she uploaded a selfie so I saw as I was scrolling the feed What’s the main thing you use the internet for? mostly Tumblr, Youtube,googling things... How many questions do you prefer in a survey? the longer the better, especially when they’re unique and not ones I answer all the time Have you ever made someone cry unintentionally? unfortunately, yeah... Is it easy to offend you? very When did you last wear a hat? I do more often than not when going anywhere so... Do you work well under pressure? I always say I do in an application for a job but because of my several anxiety disorders, once on the spot I freak out real easy and I’m a mess but I still try my hardest to get through it What is something that is or was hard to let go of? the past What colors do you normally use to decorate with? I don’t decorate Have you ever bruised one of your ribs? yeah Have you ever burned yourself on a candle? no What is one of your toxic traits? my insecurity Have you ever found a skeleton while outside? no thank god wtf What time is it currently? 6:52am How many mirrors do you have in your bedroom? our closet doors are full length mirrors so several What is something you cannot get enough of? alcohol

#survey #about me #bored

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