#and when I was younger I tried really hard to change my writing voice because again. I hated it. I thought it was weird and silly | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mydearneteyam · 4 months

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Heyy, i already made a request abt a Aonung x Albino Navi/Navi from a cold region and u wanted that the request were more specific so im just going to give u more ideas:

Like i was thinking the reader is like a messenger (i think that its the word) from her clan for the exchange of materials between the two clans, so Aonung and the reader saw eachother before and it was like love at first sight (u can change this if u want tho but i imagine like aonung felt so attracted to them bcs it was like something new to him and he was curious 😭💕) so when they finally talk they pass a lot of time together learning about each other and their clans

And idk if u wanna write this but i also imagine like when Aonung try to court reader probably Ronal would be a bit against that cuz the reader definitely doenst look like any other navi and also they are from a very different place and she wants someone good for her son and the clan, but this its optional tho 💕

FRIENDS DON'T ;; AO'NUNG

summary ;; maybe only three days of five at your side were enough to gather courage.

pairing ;; ao'nung x fem!albino!cold-region!na'vi! reader

warnings ;; none

word count ;; 1.8k

word of the day ;; herwì [ˈhɛɾ.wɪ] n. snow

first a/n ;; i really like the idea because it kinda remind be of that movie of tinker bell ?? anyways, i tried my best !! hope to get your expectations ¡!

As the rain came down hard you couldn't help but give a yawn at the horizon. The afternoon had passed too quickly for your liking and, having arrived at Awa'atlu and set things up for the next few days, there wasn't much to do anymore. You began to count down the times for tomorrow, where you should first talk to the younger ones, or perhaps the boys your age, so that they would learn how to conserve the medicinal flora.

"I thought you preferred to hide" the voice of that boy made you smile and you denied.

"Only when the sun comes up."

You had met Ao'nung maybe seven years ago, the first time your parents allowed you to accompany them. It was a cold winter, before humans could approach the snowy mountains of your clan where at present, they were already settling. You remembered how you had run your hands through the water, excited to smell new scents and meet new people. You remembered the warmth inside your big coat that tried to cover you and also, of course, you remembered the faces of those who welcomed you to their lands.

"She is our daughter, we hope that in the future she will be the designated messenger for these islands, Tonowari" your father spoke, extending his pale hand to yours which despite being covered, was the same shade. Looking up you bumped into the one who was the chief, with his partner and hidden behind the Tsahìk were their eldest son and the youngest daughter.

You didn't really like it when your parents introduced you to other clans in the mountains. Not only because they might see you as weak or clumsy due to your moon-shiny skin, but also because they often wanted to get their hands on the 'gift of Eywa'. However, from Ronal's gaze you immediately picked up that your physique was not something that caught her attention in the least and even, she seemed to disown it, looking at you with disdain when she passed by you those five days you stayed as a young na'vi.

"The previous winter you didn't come. I thought--we thought you wouldn't come this time" the boy corrected himself ominously, positioning himself to one side of you, feeling how the rain was gradually lowering its intensity.

"You missed me?" by the way he looked at you, you noticed he was surprised by your comment, but when you laughed he could only roll his eyes.

"Please, you?" he grumbled, smiling. "You people teach slow, that's all. I had a hard time understanding them. I needed my designated teacher" he gave a false explanation to which you added other words with derision.

"Or maybe we are too fast for you" you started to walk back to the marui, but he took your hand. It felt warm, unlike yours which was always cold.

"Where are you going, are you planning to hide?"

"Show, actually."

...

Ao'nung wasn't an idiot. He knew that since the first winter his feelings for you had begun to blossom, ironic as it seemed. Though there was always something that made him recoil when he sought to express himself to you. Perhaps the idea that by having a beauty beyond perfection -according to him- you would be paired with someone from the snowy mountains, maybe because he belonged to the water and you to the snow or simply, the voice of his mother and friends was stuck deep in his mind and heart. But there was always something that stopped him from showing you his true personality.

His sister called him childish, but for him there was no other way to express himself to you. Give you a necklace? Not at all, he'd rather you find it and he'd just tell you that when you found it it was yours. Express directly how he wanted to court you? Those words would never come out of his lips.

"Why are we here?" he asked, escorting you to the marui where there were some furs.

"You told me my people teach too slow, so I'll teach you from now on" you shrugged to the side and began to speak.

But while, your voice was calm when you spoke and it was one of the things he admired most about you, he couldn't help but notice your braids, adorned with brown feathers that highlighted your colorless hair. You pointed and traced with your pale fingers the animal skins you brought from your lands, but now he looked at your eyes, similar to his, blue, no, yours were the color of the water between his hands, light blue.

"…Over there they don't grow, but here they do, so with them you can adjust them and they will remain as the drums for the return of the tulkun" you finished explaining.

The rain had returned and with your poor vision, you could only see things sharply from up close. You wondered if it was his hair, maybe his eyes, but something made you notice that the boy's presence was much closer than before.

"You understood, didn't you?" you preferred to believe it was just your condition about bad view and noticed that the boy nodded. "Well, would you rather I talk to you now about-?" but he interrupted you.

"Customs. Tell me about the customs of your clan" you blinked a couple of times and cocked your head.

Customs? It wasn't necessary. Nothing had to do with them in that winter's delivery.

"What, did I speak like an animal? Come on, tell me" at his insistence, you had no choice but to explain.

First you named the ways of hunting you had, explaining with a smile how unlike the forests, there were animals with thicker skin and even fur, so they were used for clothing, especially for you or your parents, who had to take more care of their skin.

Then you talked about the artistic expressions, showing him the designs of the baskets, then telling him about the tattoos of his clan, comparing them to the face paintings in your clan. You continued to explain to him for so long that the freedom felt incredible, at least until your mother walked in, surprised.

"Oh, it's time for dinner" she reported, putting on her best smile.

As you both made your way to the place, the boy couldn't help but notice that you were attentive to everything around you and whispered, behind your mother's back.

"If you want, tomorrow I can show you a couple of things about my clan" and your smile was enough to make his heart pound, almost silencing the insecurities deep inside his body.

...

"It's not funny!" you spoke once you surfaced, having been knocked down by the ilu you had tried to hold on to and which, because of your nerves, shot out. Ao'nung's laughter was impossible to mistake and that alone made you give a grunt as you returned to his side.

"You said it was like going fishing, but you don't look to me like your fish are the size of an ilu" he put a hand on his waist, amused and quieting his laughter little by little.

"Apparently you listen to my words, huh" you folded your arms.

The day was for Ao'nung to allow himself to show you around and explain his clan to you every time you finished teaching your classes to his people. This he told his parents and, Tonowari, happy to see that his son at least once in his life was doing something for pleasure and not by command, decided to assign him that task. Besides, soon both he and you would be village chiefs and this tradition would have to continue for several generations so that the exchange of goods would be normalized.

Now, his mother was more… careful with the change in the boy's personality, after all, she was his mother, especially when she heard her son's arrival so late after the first day. Then the second.

By the third day, the two were debating methods of courtship.

"Competitions? Really?" he questioned when he came in from the hunt to your marui. You nodded.

"For example, if you have three suitors, they must face various tests. Sled races, fire dancing, there are several" you listed. "My favorite is the Säwem!"

"Säwem? Like… Fighting?" he grimaced in confusion, but you could tell how interested he was.

"Not with each other, of course. But with yourself." you clarified. "Do you consider yourself good for that person? How would you rate your efforts? How far would you go for that person? It can be internal or external factors, and you can also struggle with it spiritually or physically."

You continued with the explanation and Ao'nung felt a pain in his chest as his mouth went dry. What he felt could be a form of courtship? He even found it funny.

"…My father once stayed under a blizzard to try on mom" you recalled, laughing. "I mean, they were paired up, but still, he wanted to prove to her that he was worthy."

He wanted to consider himself worthy. Him. Just him. He didn't want someone else from your clan to try any of those things. He didn't want to know that other boys were fighting over you, even if it was at races or dances. He wanted to-

"I would do that for you" his words came out matter-of-factly. You were surprised, but his own face showed you that he was much more shocked to say it out loud.

You looked away and felt your cheeks blush a little. You felt annoyed that your own skin could give you away so easily. "Friends don't need that kind of courtship" you tried to push the idea away, embarrassed, but right now, the boy had already screwed up and there was no way to take it back.

"No, friends don't" he acknowledged, moving a little closer to you. "Friends don't" he arranged one of your albino braids carefully and looked at you. He wasn't the Ao'nung that teased you as a child. He wasn't the boy who stuck his tongue out at you, hiding behind his mother. He wasn't the one who laughed at you with his friends.. It was Ao'nung. Your Ao'nung…. "May I-" but you didn't give him time until you moved closer and kissed the corner of his lips.

You both looked at each other for a while and your cheeks were already between a very strong purple and pink.

"Sorry. I forgot my vision wasn't the best. I wanted to kiss your lips" you admitted, covering your mouth with one of your hands.

He pushes your hand away with his, laughing, and intertwines your fingers. His laughter surrounded you and so did his arms.

For him, 'Moon skin' as his mother used to say with unpleasant voice matched perfectly.

a/n ;; I REALLY WANTED TO WRITE ABOUT RONAL BUT I THOUGHT THAT JUST LIKE THIS IT WAS PERFECT BECAUSE THEY ARE HAPPY OKAY IM SRRY 😭😭😭😭ALSO, I INVENTED SO MANY THINGS??? james cameron squirms on the set of Avatar 3 istg i was listening to "calling after me" by wallows while i was writing this btw

#aonung x reader #aonung x you #aonung x y/n #avatar x reader #atwow #avatar fanfiction #avatar 2022 #avatar 2 #avatar #avatar way of water #avatar x reader fluff #avatar x y/n #avatar x you #aonung avatar #ao'nung x reader #aonung x female reader #aonung x albino reader #aonung x na'vi reader

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yooneunhay · 15 days

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Essence of the Feathered Heart

【ＣＨＡＰＴＥＲ　ＯＮＥ】

𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨; (eventually) ot8ateez x hybridbird!reader

𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨; human!seonghwa (ft; human!hongjoong, foxhybrid!wooyoung) x hybridbird!reader

A/N ♥ hello reader !! this is my first time ever writing a fanfic or really a story so please dont be too harsh ^^,

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𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐨𝐯

it was early morning, maybe about 7am, when i was walking back to my little cabin in the forest. i had only been living here for about 2 years with no one having had found out. i was an outcast to my family. my whole family was born with beautiful black shiny wings while i was born with white ones. my grandpa was the only one who accepted me but it was probably because he also was born with white wings. he use to tell me how beautiful my wings were and how i should "never change who i am for anyone".

i think it was just his old age talking and him having regrets of how he lived his life and not wanting the same for me. he passed away 2 years ago which is why i now live here at this cabin. without my grandpa to protect me from my family they kicked me out, banished me if you will. for obvious reason i never got along with the rest of my family. when i was younger i would often run away to this cabin to be away from my family. i thought no one could find this cabin since it was so far into the forest, i thought that until i heard the cracking of the leaves outside the cabin. all of my senses are immediately filled, i close my eyes and crouch down so i'm not in view of the windows, trying my hardest to hear every little sound i could.

bang!

if i didn't hear the bullet break through the window then i still would've felt it pierce through my right wing. it hurt, a lot, but it didn't falter my ablilty to fly thankfully. immediately i was up in the air trying to escape from the cabin. i still didn't know what was going on but i knew i had to get out but as i was almost out the door, the wind created by my wings as i tried to fly out the door causing dust to fly everywhere, occasionally losing balance from pain and knocking vases, side tables, and some chairs over, i noticed i started not be able to feel my right wing.

"what? what's going on? ugh it hurts so much.." i thought to myself.

my vision starts to go blurry and i can't feel my wings anymore and i'm starting to lose feeling in the rest of my body and then..black. i felt my body hit the dirt just outside the cabin. i most likely wasn't even 10 feet from the steps leading up to the porch when i hit the ground the air getting knocked out of me. i could somewhat make out the voices around me.

"2 people. men. but..i can't see them" i thought to myself.

i tried to cover my body with my wings to provide me some sort of protection from these 2 men but as hard as i tried they wouldn't move.

"hunters? no they would've killed me already." i couldn't think anything else to myself as i soon lost conscious.

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𝐬𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐰𝐚'𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐯

"Seonghwaaa, do you have to gooo?" i heard my fox hybird ,Wooyoung, cry to me as i put my shoes on.

"you want that new toy don't you?" i said back to him as he continued to pout at me.

"yes but can't Hongjoong get it? i wanted to keep playing with you.."

as Wooyoung continued to pout to me about not wanting me to leave, Hongjoong came up behind him putting the top of his head.

"come on Woo, let Seonghwa have some time alone. dinner is ready, i'll put some in the microwave for when you get home Hwa." i nodded to him,

"i'll be back soon Woo don't worry, we can keep playing games once i'm back."

i stood up from putting my shoes on, petting the top of his head behind his ears where he liked it. he purred a little. i waved to Wooyoung and Hongjoong saying i'd be quick. walking to the store was quiet, the sun was starting to set but it was still pretty bright outside. i walked up to the adoption center where they also sold lots of hybrids stuff, clothes for hybrids that have tail holes, hats with ear holes, some shirts with holes for wings, toys for teething or just to play with. i walked into the adoption center going to the section with toys looking for the one my fox hybrid wanted badly enough to ask me to go out and get it right then and there. as i was browsing through the toy section i could hear the front doors to the adoption center open. i didn't bother looking over, since i assumed it was just another customer coming in, but it was the blur of white that caught my eye. i looked over and saw two men basically dragging in this bird hybrid who was thrashing around clearly trying their hardest to get out of their restraints and the hold of the two men. the wings on this bird hybrid were so beautiful, breath taking, a gorgeous white color. i noticed the hint of red on the bird hybirds restrained wings.

"blood. they must've been captured as a unregistered hybrid." i thought to myself.

i felt bad. it must hurt. i watched as the two men dragged away the pretty winged hybrid. i noticed the muzzle the men had put on the hybrid. i didn't know what it would be for considering how the hybrid seemed to not have any sharp teeth. "maybe they just bite.." i said under my breath. the hybrids head turned once i said that, our eyes meeting. they looked so lost and almost defeated when we made eye contact. that was before they continued thrasing around and then they were pulled to the adoption side, behind a wall, to the orange code part of the center i'm assuming.

"orange codes, aggressive hybrids that are put into confinement, usually strapped to a bed of some sort depending on the hybrid, until they have calm down." i thought to myself as the lady at the front desk checked out the toy i was buying.

i left the adoption center, walking home, but i couldn't get that hybrid out of my head. once i reached home i gave Wooyoung the toy he wanted and gentelly patted his head has he started to play with it.

"what's wrong?"

i looked up from my daze to see Hongjoong looking up at me from his laptop at the table.

"nothing..just thinking." i responded.

it's not like i was lying to him or anything but there was a weird gut feeling in my stomach as i spoke to him. "oh come on, don't give me that. there's clearly something bothering you." i breathed in as i gathered my thoughts to tell him.

"i saw this beautiful bird hybrid at the adoption center when i went to get Woo his toy..i just can't stop thinking about them. how much pain they must being going through right now."

Hongjoong knew where this kind of conversation would lead, i knew it too. Hongjoong sighed as he got up from the table where he was working on his laptop and sat next to me on the couch.

"is this your way of asking me if we can adopted the hybrid?"

i stayed silent. in a way, even if i didn't want to admit it, i was asking him if we could take in another hybrid. we already had three though..even though our apartment was fairly big, having four hybrids would be a lot to take care of. i knew that and yet, that one hybrid wouldn't leave my mind.

------

hii tysm for reading this far !! i know this chapter wasn't much plot but it was a lot to write so i hope you're happy with it anyway ^^ if anyone wants to be on my tagged list pls comment for it !!

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alcazarofthestars · 5 months

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Can you do Blue Lock Sae x female reader x Rin fluff? The brothers are fighting for her love.

Hehehehe.... I don't know why but I'm a sucker for these types of fics, especially since it's about my two favorite bllk boys. But anyways, sure anon! I desperately need to practice writing fluff since I haven't done any for a while now. And I realized how hard it is to make a banner on a laptop because I originally wanted them to be placed on different sides... TwT

English isn't my first language so there will be some problems with my grammar.

Warnings: Nothing really, just Rin and Sae fighting for the reader's attention behind her back. Reader is implied to be their childhood friend and a bit older than Rin. Reader will be referred to as [Name].

3rd person POV:

Today in the Itoshi household, there seems to be a little... problem...

"Just what do you think you're doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in Spain or something." Rin spat as he glared at his older brother, Sae, who was sitting on the couch in front of him.

But to understand what is currently happening, let's start from the beginning, shall we?

Today is one of the few days where Rin could take a break from Blue Lock. Usually on days like these he would inform his dearest childhood friend (and crush), you, so the two of you can hang out before he returns to Blue Lock again. But unfortunately for Rin, there seems to be a change in his plans. And this rearrangement was caused by none other than his older brother Sae who just so happens to be on a break from his job.

And that leads us to where we are now. The two brothers are currently having an intense staring contests, the tension in the room is so thick that it could be cut in half using a knife. And to finish it all off, Mr and Mrs Itoshi are out of town on business so they couldn't separate the two away from each other.

It was at that moment that the person who would break the tension arrived, knocking on the door. "Hello? Rin, are you there?" The familiar voice of [Name] called, making both brothers freeze as they turn to look at the door. "I'm going to come in, alright?" She threatened as the door was slowly opening.

[Name] had just opened the door, but it seems like she hadn't realized that Sae was also there in the living room because she looked busy searching for something in the bag that she had brought along with her. "I know that you had just got back from Blue Lock and stuff, but I got you-?!" And that was her when she realized that Sae was there. "A-ah, it's nice to see you again, Sae." She greeted him, although a bit hesitant due to the fact that she wasn't expecting him to be in Japan right now.

Sae had now focused his attention on [Name], a small unnoticeable blush crept up on his face, as he just gave a small nod before looking away and focusing on the floor. Has it always been this clean and spotless?

A moment of peaceful (awkward) silence came after. "Hey Sae, we were about to watch a few movies together. Do you want to join us? It'll be just like what we used to do together when we were younger." As if sensing the tension, [Name] smiled as she tried to change the topic by inviting Sae to their little binge watching session. Much to Rin's dismay that was evident by the surprised look on his face. "Sure, I don't really have anything to do anyways." He responded although a bit blunt, he seemed rather excited when [Name] suggested that he joined them.

But this didn't escape Rin's sight. He isn't going to let his brother get in the way of his time with [Name], not on his watch.

If there's one thing that both brothers can remember well are all the moments that they had spent together with [Name]. But some of the most memorable has to be all the movie nights/sleepovers that they had together when they were younger. Though, most of the fun memories were made in the preparation for the movies, such as;

Making Homemade Snacks in the Kitchen

Usually before they'd start, they would prepare the snacks beforehand together. But Rin would rather not take any chances of his brother getting closer with his crush. So he had already prepared for this.

How you may ask? Well that's simple! He is way much better at cooking than Sae, he's been training for this moment since that one time you got bedridden due to a fever in middle school. So he will definitely impress you with his cooking skills!

So when you asked for them to help in preparing some snacks, he was more than confident in his skills.

He did not expect this to happen. Someone please explain to him why on earth his brother is getting all of [Name]'s attention while he just watches on the sidelines as he continues to peel the skin of potatoes in his own silent anger.

He swears that Sae is doing it on purpose too! I mean, just look at how whenever you weren't looking he would give a small but sly smirk to his younger brother before asking how to continue doing the next step in the cooking book. Sae doesn't even need help with most of the steps! Like come on, was he born yesterday or something cause he's acting like he doesn't know how to use a blender or cut some tofu.

Rin doesn't know why but he feels jealous whenever you would get close to his brother to show him how to do something or how you would put your hand on Sae's to guide him whenever he was cutting something. At this point, Rin is practically seething in jealousy. So much so that he didn't notice when he accidentally cut his finger a bit.

Sae may have won the kitchen battle, but he will not win the movie war.

Scores:

Rin: 0 Sae: 1

2. Preparing a Comfortable Spot to Watch

This is a tradition that would make their parents angry, you see, as kids both brothers would love to make a pillow fort together while you were busy usually with making the drinks. But sometimes, they tend to forget about it and their parents would scold them about returning things back to where it originally was.

Truthfully, Sae had forgotten about this little tradition. He doesn't really have any time for watching movies, and if he did it was either at a cinema with his teammates or on his couch in his house in Spain.

So during the time [Name] was preparing the drinks, Sae was just scrolling on his phone because he had gotten a lot of calls and texts from Shidou who somehow has his phone number now so Sae was trying to block him only for Shidou to use another number, but while this was happening Rin was turning the living room into a literal pillow haven. Most of the room was filled with pillows, blankets, and plushies (You gave one to each of them for their birthday and it's been well taken care of).

Rin wonders how Sae will react once he finds out that he was the culprit who gave Shidou his number. When Sae realized what Rin was doing (Sae made Shidou snitch on Rin), it was far too late. You already finished making the drinks and Rin had already picked out a movie.

Perhaps Sae was feeling a bit tired because he swears that he had seen Rin smirking at him as you compliment Rin. Yeah, he was definitely drowsy cause there is no way that he's losing against his brother out of all people, and even worse is that he's taking all of your attention.

No, he is not jealous.

He is definitely not jealous. Why would he be? He is way much better than Rin, so why would he be jealous? So what if Rin got a kiss on his cheek as a reward? when it comes to you; he won't lose to anyone, especially Rin.

If Rin wants to challenge him then he should know that Sae won't back down that easily.

Scores:

Rin: 1 Sae: 1

3. Movies!

When the three of you were still little kids you had a bedtime, but since you're now older you can stay up as long as you want. And back then there was a very limited amount of movies that you were allowed to watch since you were still young, but now you can watch anything you want although there is still some that you'd rather stay away from.

There are a large number of movies that the TV could offer, you were no longer confined to watching movies rated for kids so there wasn't much trouble with picking what to watch.

The problem is the two Itoshi brothers, you were aware of what had happened between them and the fact that their relationship isn't really the best. But this is too much! They've been glaring at each other since you came in. The tension feels almost suffocating, no scratch that- it is suffocating.

"How about we watch this one?" You asked as you had just picked a random movie, the two only nodded their heads as you started the movie.

Oh God that sure was a mistake.

Of all the movie options available you just had to pick out a horror movie, huh? Well, can't really back down now.

So this leads you to where you are right now, sitting in between Sae and Rin as you hold on tightly to Sae's hand after he offered it to you seeing how much you were sweating as Rin just rolled his eyes in jealousy. But the thing that you don't know is that Sae is afraid as well.

There was a scene halfway in the movie where the suspense was incredibly high when suddenly a jump scare appeared causing both you and Sae to scream as you hugged Rin's arm tightly for the rest of the movie.

The two brothers seemed sleepy when the movie had ended. You had excused yourself to use the washroom and placed a pillow in your stead. but when you got back there was a surprise waiting for you. Both Sae and Rin had fallen asleep leaning on the pillow that you placed in your stead.

Final Score:

Rin: 1.5 Sae: 1.5 [Name]: 2

Mission make the Itoshi brothers bond together has somehow failed successfully, but you aren't really complaining.

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peachhcs · 3 months

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how do i get the girl back?

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will blurb)

after coming home from the combine, will confides in his mom and older sister about the breakup + getting samy back.

1.2k words

hiii this blurb was cutie to write since i don't write a lot about will's family. again, if you want smaller blurbs of the new breakup timeline let me know!! :))

au masterlist

with will’s back to the back door, he didn’t see or hear his sister trailing out behind him. her footsteps were always too soft for the boy to hear so that’s why she always scared him whenever she came up behind him.

“i feel like i’m getting deja vu finding you out here,” grace said, making will jump hearing her voice. the boy spun around, his older sister standing a few feet away from the step he was sitting on.

a tiny frown fell across his lips, “is that a bad or good thing?”

“well, the last time i found you out here, you and samy just broke up,” grace hummed, but not in a way like she was trying to mock her brother, she was just simply stating it.

when will didn’t respond grace found a spot on the step next to him. the siblings didn’t say anything at first, just enjoying the comfortable silence they sat in because sometimes it was rare being alone together and not playfully bickering about something.

“you’ve been kind of sparse since you got back,” the older blonde said, her eyes on their yard.

“oh, sorry. i don’t really mean to be,” will shrugged some. his little panic attack of realization he had last week was still fresh in the boy’s mind and he actually couldn’t stop thinking about it.

“wanna talk about it at all?” grace wondered, knowing there was something on her little brother’s mind that kept him from being around much.

“you’re gonna call me an idiot,” the boy mumbled, looking away.

“no, i won’t. i promise,” grace shook her head. sure, her brother has made terrible decisions, but she still loved him above everything and wasn’t gonna call him stupid.

“last week..i told myself i was gonna try and forget about samy. i met this girl and i tried talking to her until i had the very hard realization that i was just pretending she was samy in my mind and i found myself still talking about her even when i wasn’t trying to,” will explained.

grace watched her brother’s head fall into his arms, hiding his facial expressions from her. she’s never seen him like this before—so sad and vulnerable. he was always the tough one and she was usually the one ranting to him about all the terrible guys she’s been on dates with. this was new and a bit unfamiliar territory for the older girl.

“so what does this mean?” she wondered gently.

“i think it means i fucked up, but i don’t know how to get her back,” the younger blonde admitted in a muffle through his arms.

the older smith sibling sat there for a moment, conjuring up a proper response in her head. “what made you wanna breakup with her in the first place then?”

“a mix of bad decisions and my own insecurities,” now that was a surprising one. if grace could describe her brother, she’d definitely tell people he was sometimes very arrogant with a little too much confidence, so hearing her brother say himself that he had insecurities made the girl question everything she’s known.

“you’re insecure? about what?”

“a lot of things and it got into my head too much where i thought i wouldn’t be good enough for samy being so far away. i started overthinking how she’d find someone new who was way better than me and dump me for him, so i figured i’d save myself the trouble..” the younger boy explained a bit weakly.

“oh, will..” grace sighed. “you know that’s not true, right? you know samy doesn’t think that. you are good enough for her. actually, you’re perfect for her,” watching the two grow up, grace’s seen their relationship change and develop through the years.

her brother had a hard outer shell, so seeing someone completely crack it open was somewhat of a miracle. she’s never seen her brother so happy before whenever samy was around and she saw the big smile will brought to samy’s lips too.

“yeah, i get that now, grace,” will mumbled.

“you’re not an idiot, will. i promise. you made a rash decision, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be fixed,” she reached out to touch his arm where he finally found her gaze again.

“i wouldn’t be too sure about that. she doesn’t ever wanna talk to me again,” the boy sighed.

before grace could answer, the back door opened again. this time colleen came out searching for her two kids, surprised to find them together on the back steps.

“there you two are. i’ve been looking for you guys,” the older woman smiled, but it faded seeing the gloomy looks. “what’s wrong? you guys look sad.”

will hadn’t really talked to his parents about the breakup and this was grace’s first time getting him to open up about it more since it happened. the boy’s gaze slid to his sisters where she gently nodded, telling him to tell her.

“how do i fix a really bad mistake i made?” will squeaked out.

“what do you mean, honey?” colleen drew closer to her kids.

“how do i get back the girl i love?” the mom finally understood what her son was trying to say. she frowned even more when will’s teary eyes returned and she took that as her sign to wrap her arms around him in a tight hold.

“oh, baby, it’s gonna be okay. i promise,” colleen cooed into wil’s ear as if he was five years old again.

“i’m such an idiot, mom. i don’t know how to make any of this better or attempt to fix it,” will cried a bit.

“you’re not an idiot, will. i’ll say that first. you had a lot on your mind and i get that. i’m not excusing your behavior towards her, but i understand the pressure of everything. you really love her and want her back?”

the younger blonde nodded, “i really do.”

“it’s not gonna be easy. you broke her trust, so you’re gonna have to earn that back and be okay with the fact of her being stand-offish at first whenever you do start talking again. i don’t think it would be a bad idea to reach out to her though. try talking to her before our family vacation coming up? she will be there, you know,” colleen suggested. she’s heard the story from samy’s side from ellen and from the looks of it, it just seemed like the two needed some space to cool off before trying to talk again.

“i don’t even know what i would say to her if i did reach out. i have no way of doing so anyway,” the younger blonde shrugged.

“why don’t you sleep on it. is ryan around or something? you two could go hang out to get your mind off of it for awhile,” mrs. smith said and grace nodded in agreement.

“yeah, i guess so,” will dug through his pocket for his phone.

“it won’t feel like this forever, willie. it’s gonna work out, i promise,” grace squeezed her younger brother’s arm. he managed a weak smile in her direction, but he had a hard time believing his mom and sister’s words.

the history him and samhain had didn’t mean that would be the magic fix to everything. he’ll be lucky if he can even get her to talk to him again.

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squintyeyedjoel · 5 months

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Look For The Light | (Joel x Reader) - Coming Soon!

Synopsis: When Joel and Ellie are on their way to find the Fireflies, they stumble across something else in an abandoned farmhouse. Something unexpected and life changing - you. ….and the three year old toddler you rescued three days ago that happens to harbor something familiar Joel has a hard time reconciling with.

(Sneak peek below the cut!)

Suddenly the handle on the door to your room jiggled, making the breath stutter in your chest.

The low voice on the other side of the wooden barrier made you jump. “I’ll give you to the count of three, otherwise I’m breakin’ this thing down.”

You gulped.

“One.”

Silence.

“Two.”

A beat more.

“Three.”

Suddenly the door swung open, the latch busting into pieces and skittering across the floor as the hulking frame of a man barreled through shoulder first. Just behind him you saw a teenaged girl peeking in curiously from the top of the steps.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, offering a timid smile. “I’d have met you at the door, but,” you looked down toward the bundle in your arms, the smile turning more genuine. “My hands are full.”

“Holy fucking shit,” the teenager mumbled, before trying to make her way around the grumpy looking man. He caught her by her backpack, not allowing her any closer, to which she turned a skeptical look his way. “Really, Joel? It’s a baby. What’s it gonna do, drool me to death?”

You snorted a laugh, arching an eyebrow at the man- Joel’s unimpressed look your way.

“It’s a toddler. They’d scream your ear off b’fore they’d drool-” He stopped when he glanced from the tiny human in your arms who looked up at him with wide, curious eyes, and focused back on the teen, finding her already looking at him with raised brows.

After a moment he released her with a sigh, and she took a few tentative steps your way, wide grin climbing up her face.

“How would you know, anyway?” She teased the man without sparing him a glance.

The look he shot at the back of the girl's head made you want to grin, but you successfully tucked it into the top of the little human’s head in your lap.

“I’m older ‘an you. Been ‘round the block a few times, is all. Know a thing or two.” His voice was a rumbling grouse, the dry tone exasperated and saying he’d been here a time or two before, this argument worn and thin.

“Yeah, because you’re ancient,” she mocked.

“Ain’t that old,” he grumbled.

“Dirt is younger, Joel.”

“Not worried I’m infected?” You kept your voice calm, not wanting to poke the angry bear known as Joel.

The girl smiled in a way that said she had more to say than what she was telling as she knelt next to you. “No. Not really.”

“Ellie,” Joel groaned, taking a step closer as the teen sat next to you, her shoulder lightly bumping against your own as her back pressed against the wall.

“I’m not, by the way,” you looked between them both. “Infected.” Looking down to the toddler in your arms, snorting as she tried to hide further into your threadbare shirt, you couldn’t help but smile softly. “Neither is she.”

“What’s her name?” Ellie reached out a finger for the little one to hold. It was taken tentatively, and given a firm shake like she had seen countless adults do around her in the QZ you’d been in before.

It made Joel snort out a laugh through his nose.

“Sarah.”

The laugh turned into a choking sound, quickly melting into a coughing fit as Joel bent over at his waist, bracing his hands on his knees as he fought for air.

“You okay, old man?”

You tried to stifle the smile Ellie’s comment brought to your face before you turned your gaze back up to Joel once again.

After a long moment, he stood up straight with a huff. “Fine.” Another long pause. “Just swallowed wrong.”

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cherryredstars · 1 year

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Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x fem!reader

Warnings: Some Fluff, Talk of Death/Afterlife, Suggested Depression, Suggested Self-Harm, Suggested Breakdown, Suggested Anxiety, Light Smut

Word Count: 3.7K

“I recognized you instantly. All of our lives flashed through my mind in a split second. I felt a pull so strongly towards you that I almost couldn't stop it.” ― J. Sterling

It was a hot and humid day. The type of days Miguel hates the most in September because the heat made him uncomfortable and the humidity made his hair frizzy and lose its shape. It was even worse while sitting in a stuffy classroom with ACs that never worked. The rooms were always filled with the strong smell of teenage bodies and dust from janitorial neglection over the summer months. In addition, the beginning weeks of school were a bore with nothing to actually do but sit there and listen to underpaid teachers repeat the same school rules they hear in the beginning of every school semester.

He was sure he was about to fall asleep at that moment. The heat made him drowsy and the monotone voice of his teacher morphed into white noise. It was nearing the end of the day anyways, and too early into the school year for any teachers to give enough of a shit to write anyone up. He couldn’t take another second of school expectations and the disgusting mix of AXE body spray and floral perfume. But, now when he thinks back on that boring class, he can’t take it on himself to fully hate it. Because, in the same second that he looked toward the clock above the door to check the time, his life changed forever.

It was instant. Maybe not instant instant, but it was just quick enough to call it instant. She had come in late. Very late with a chest that heaved and tried to keep her rapidly beating heart in her body. Sweat made the front pieces of her hair stick to her face, flushed from the way she had run down the hall to make it to class. Of course, in that moment Miguel found her less than ideal, but he knows now that even in that stuffy school uniform the academy mandated every student to wear, she was the most beautiful goddamn thing that walked the entire earth. And when she spoke to give her name for attendance, a voice and name that will haunt Miguel until he takes his last breath, he knew their lives would be forever intertwined.

That thought was concrete the second you had walked down the same row of desks as him, stopping at the desk directly in front of him. The smell of sweetness and a bit of sweat, a smell that only comes to him in the early mornings when he isn’t really awake or asleep, instantly overpowered any other smell in the room. If he skips ahead, he can remember nearly every instance in which he leaned his stomach against the hard edge of the desk to get a stronger smell, everytime he held up a piece of your hair to his face, everytime he snuck out of your bedroom window smelling like you after spending the night making love. But, Miguel is a man who follows a strict timeline, who revels in the chronological order of things.

Instead, he focuses on the first time he had the chance to talk to you. Despite you being only a desk away, it took a few months to hold an actual conversation that was more than, “Do you have an extra pencil?” or “Did you write down the last bullet of that slide?” Despite the lack of communication, the younger Miguel had developed a slight crush on you. He had seen you in the halls between classes and he focused more on you than on the board in class. In all honesty, the delay in conversation was purely your fault. You were an energetic girl, not popular but well known. Someone was always talking to you at your desk in the beginning and end of class. Always laughing with you about something stupid that happened early that day, always asking for help for an upcoming test or assignment, always taking up your time. He could never be mad about it, though. Even if it meant he had lost an extra few months with you. It was okay because even if those months weren’t with you, they were of you. Months filled with the sound of your voice, the addicting sound of your laugh, the glimpses of your smile and shiny eyes. Moments that fill his head when he sleeps at night and when he gets lost in a daydream.

You had turned to him, asking him about some party one of his friends at the time was planning because he had turned 18. They’re simple, small questions: “What was the address again?”, “Anyone is invited, right?”, “What’s the dress code? Is there a theme?”, “Are you going?”. He had to bite his tongue to stop from scaring you off with manic answers. Yes, anyone is invited but don’t bring some random guy with you. Bring me with you instead. The dress code doesn’t matter because you’ll look stunning in anything you wear. I only want to go if you go.

“You… only want to go if I go?” You had asked. Your voice was decorated with a confused giggle and your ears had glowed pink.

Miguel blinked up at you with his own confusion. He had yet to realize his last words had bubbled out of his chest until you were giggling and eyeing him shyly. He was quick to cover his face as it grew warm, and he let out a groan while cursing himself. You had laughed harder then, eyes shining with a build-up of tears as you clutched your stomach. Miguel had spread his fingers slightly so he could peak through them. You were a sight to behold with that enchanting laughter and infatuating smile. He couldn’t keep himself from smiling against his palms. When you had finally reduced your amusement to a toothy smile, you had gently pried Miguel’s hands off his face just enough to see him.

He was sure he looked stupid, mouth slightly agape and eyes wide over the fact you were touching him. Your hands were warm and small against his and he swore his heart was trying to rip open his chest so it could run to you. He almost went dizzy when your thumb stroked his hands in a comforting manner in hopes of easing his embarrassment. He had never wanted to kiss someone so badly before. Would you have minded? God he really hoped you wouldn’t.

“Miguel?” You sang, a teasing smile on your face as you looked at him, “Are you there?”

Say it again. Say my name again, please. You’re the only person ever allowed to say it ever again. God, he was losing his mind. He still is losing it over you. Every goddamn day. Miguel doesn’t think he’ll ever get it back. You took it from him. His mind, his body, his soul. You took everything from him. It’s yours. It’s yours, it’s yours, it’s yours.

Please, give it back to me.

When he had finally responded to you, your smile had shone brighter and you asked him a question that still leaves his mind dumbstruck when he thinks back on it: What time do you want to pick me up? He remembers the way his breath flew out of his lungs, how his heart had paused and then started running again. Remembers the way your throat bobbed slightly, probably because you had regretted asking the question or maybe, he hopes this is why because he never thought to ask you, maybe because you were nervous too. Just maybe you had wanted to talk to him before this life altering moment. Maybe, somewhere in the back of your mind, you knew you were tied to this fool of a boy too.

He had stuttered out a pathetic ‘what?’ and you had rolled your eyes playfully in response. You ditched repeating the question and had instead given him a time and your address before getting up as the bell rang. While you walked out the door with a small wave and big smile, Miguel sat there in an astonished daze blinking at the board. Time seemed to stop as everyone else around him started walking past him to their next classes. It wasn’t until his friend walked past, jolting him with a slap on the back and a whispered, ‘good work, dude’ before walking out the door that he came back to his senses. It was only then that the conversation finally registered in Miguel’s dazzled brain. He leaned forward and hid his face in his hands again as he closed his eyes and his mouth formed a large smile.

He had a date. He had a date with you.

His shoulders shook with a silent, delirious laugh.

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Miguel knew he was in love. Or, he knew he was going to be in love. It’s complicated to describe, that nagging feeling that wasn’t exactly scary but wasn’t completely comforting either. It’s even weirder feeling it. Having your mind constantly crying out go home, go home, go home but your body pulls you away from every building and straight towards another body like you’re tethered together. Like he’s tethered to you. Sometimes, when Miguel closes his eyes and really concentrates, he can still feel that sharp tug at the center of his chest that tries to bring him somewhere that he tries to get further and further away from.

He can’t lie and say it wasn’t the big things that made him think, know, he was in love. Because it was. But it was also the small things. Like when you found out what his favorite color was, yellow despite popular belief, and how you had come into school the next week with your nails done in the exact shade you had made him show you on his phone. Or that time he had seen your phone light up in class and your display had revealed that you were listening to the same song he was mumbling under his breath the day before on repeat. It was the collection of those small details that made his heart beat a bit faster and for his smile to tick up behind his hand.

And it was that first kiss. That damned first kiss that Miguel can still feel ghosting against his lips. That he feels on his bad days like some sort of silent encouragement that he will get through it. Swears those phantom lips are what pulls him out of his night terrors as if to protect him as he pants and cries in those late hours. The same kiss that he wishes he could feel forever and ever and simultaneously burn from memory. Sometimes, he thinks about pulling some poor, unsuspecting stranger off the street and kissing them to see if it would feel the same. When he thinks like that, he instantly goes to the bathroom and dry heaves until his throat hurts. Of course it would never feel the same, what a silly idea. What a betrayal and discourtesy towards you to even entertain the idea.

The kiss had happened weeks after the party. In between those two moments had been brushed hands, glances in the hallways, and not so subtle flirting whispered during lessons. Each moment had Miguel’s face flushing and heart racing. It left him with a craving for you. So, when you had invited him to study with you in the library, he had eagerly nodded despite knowing he would ace the test without looking over any of his notes. He would be too busy looking at you either way to focus on his chicken scratch.

You hadn’t gotten much studying done that day either. Instead, Miguel had distracted you with whispered words in your ears that caused you to quietly giggle and smile up at him. He can remember every detail. From the way your cheeks grew to match the pink of your lips, how you had fiddled with the mechanical pencil in your hand, how your eyes had twinkled as you leaned towards him. He remembers how you had grabbed his hand, a soft and gentle touch, asking him to come with you to find a book you needed. Remembers how you had pulled him towards the back shelves filled with encyclopedias with bug-bitten pages. Can still remember the slight dizzy feeling he had when you pulled him around one of the old bookshelves and pressed him into it. Can still feel the hands pressed against his chest to hold him in place as you peaked around the corner in case anyone was coming over. He remembers the notes he chuckled as he asked you what you were doing. Can see the smile you gave him before you pulled him down for the only kiss that will ever matter in his entire life.

Your lips were soft and tasted like the cherry lip gloss you wore. He had furrowed his brows as his hands came to squeeze your waist while he moved his mouth over yours. He memorized the trail your hands took as they traveled up his chest and tangled in his hair. He can replicate the way his vocal cords shifted as he let out that satisfied groan when you allowed him to slip his tongue into your mouth. If he were to look down at his hand right now, he could swear the creases of his palms still have your sticky gloss stuck in them from when he had turned you around to press you against the shelves, but his desperation caused books to fall and his hand went to cover your mouth as you pulled away and started laughing. He had smiled down at you and buried his head in the crook of your neck to muffle his own laughter. He never regretted getting detention for the next few days when the librarian had found the both of you. It just gave him more chances to kiss you when the detention instructor fell asleep.

It was during one of those detention kisses that he had whispered against your lips to be his girlfriend. You had answered with another kiss and a delighted yes.

☆*:..｡. .｡.:*☆☆*:..｡. .｡.:*☆☆*:..｡. .｡.:*☆☆*:..｡. .｡.:*☆☆*:..｡. .｡.:*☆

It had been a month or two after the one year anniversary that he finally made love to you. It was sometime in the later months of senior year. Another hot and humid day. But instead of being in a classroom, he had been in your room. Miguel remembers that your sheets had been white with a small flower print, throw pillows and blankets making up for the lack of color. They were soft under the material of his jeans as he held you while you cried.

On that day, your usually clean room was in shatters. Things ripped from your walls, notebooks and papers shoved off your desk, clothes taken off hangers and thrown on the floor. The only things that had survived had been pictures of the two of you and your bed. He had gotten a call from your frantic mother, begging him to come calm you down. That he was the only one that can get through the fog in your mind. He had rushed over, your mother opening the door for him so he could run up the stairs to your room. When he had thrown open the door, his chest broke in a way that made it almost impossible to breathe. He rubs his chest whenever he thinks back to it, like the heartbreak is still there.

You had thrown yourself in a corner, sobbing and rocking yourself back and forth in a way to seek comfort. The mess of your room had surrounded you, barricading you from everything else. When the door knocked into the wall, your face had left your arms and tear-beaded lashes blinked up at him. You had cried harder when you had seen him. He had strived towards you, picking you up easily off the ground and away from the chaos on your floor. He cradled you in his arms, your legs wrapping around his hips as you cried tears into his T-shirt. He had whispered soft, caring words into your ear, an arm wrapped around your waist and a hand in your hair.

You had cried for another hour, hiccuping watery words about a scary future. A life of uncertainties and insecurities. A life where you ended up alone and scared and desperate to get by. A world where dreams don’t exist and your greatest fears consume you. Days where you don’t know how to get out of bed and shut up the nasty voices in your head. Minutes where you’re tempted to listen to them and then the hours that follow where you hate yourself for contemplating it. If Miguel were to go into his closet right now, he can find the same shirt he wore. A single shoulder lingering with black splotches of mascara that never fully washed away. Each splotch represents a worry you had trusted him with.

He had pressed you closer to him, whispering ‘it’s not your fault’, over and over and over again until his throat ached and your cries had died down to soft trembling. Another hour was spent in silence as he had just held you. His hands playing mindlessly with your hair and your breath tickling his neck. The sun had begun to set and a golden glow had lit up your bed in a yellow color.

“It’s your favorite shade,” You had whispered in a broken voice. It was scratchy and rough. Miguel thought it sounded just as lovely as it always has. It reminds him of a pipe organ, beautiful but sad.

He had to turn around to see what you were talking about. He turned his head slightly to see your hand outstretched, fingers playing as the light spilled from them. He can’t remember a time where you looked so peaceful. He had watched your hand, before nodding his head in agreement. “Yes, it is.”

He reached his hand out, taking a hold of yours gently and connecting his fingers with yours like a puzzle. He brought his hands back towards the both of you, bringing it up to his lips and kissing your knuckles. He watched your eyes, red and puffy from crying. He held your hand to his mouth for a while, his thumb stroking the skin. When he had finally dropped your hand, you leaned forward to rest your forehead against his, just staring into his eyes. Your scent instantly filled his nose. It is the same smell that he has stored in his bedside drawer in a glass bottle. He never sprays it in his room, just holds it to his nose with closed eyes and pretends you’re right next to him again.

“I love you.” The words were sweet and poured warmth onto his skin. He closed his eyes and sat there, letting your words echo in his head until he memorized how each letter and syllable sounded when it left your lips.

Miguel remembers the strength he used to grab your waist as he connected your lips to his. Remembers that the kiss was different from any other kiss the two of you had shared before this. He still can’t describe why it was different, but he can still feel it in his bones. He remembers pushing his body into yours and you pushing back. Even though his eyes were closed in the moment, he can see everything clearly in his mind, as if he were a phantom watching it. Can see the exact placement of your hands on his shoulders, can see the way your lips parted and the soft noise you made when he had flipped the two of you over and laid you on your back.

Those soft, soft noises that split his chest open so his heart can absorb them and keep them safe. He remembers every soft pant and plead you had whispered into the air of your room as he stripped you of your clothes, kissing trails down your body. The giggle you had let out when he almost tripped taking off his pants is still trapped between those plaster walls. The soft feeling of your skin under his was like a cloud, your body warmth the sun. He remembers the halo your hair made as the dying sunlight bathed your face and caused your eyes to shine and for your skin to glow. He remembers the light dimming from your face as he slid slowly into you. He had immediately apologized as you whimpered in temporary pain.

He had slowly moved inside you, taking his time as you held him close to your body. The soft moans of his name traveled through shivers that rode down his spine, the sounds quiet to not alert your parents. His response was the repeated saying of I love you, over and over again. He repeated it, looking down at your face, into your eyes, so you could see the realness and vulnerability of the words. He made sure you felt it as he grabbed onto your skin and buried his head into your neck as he thrusted. He felt the love you had for him in every scratch down his back and tightening of your walls around him.

He remembers trying to hold on to his pleasure before it exploded right after yours. He had panted as he looked down at you, your breaths mixing together. He had kissed you softly as he pulled his softening member out of you and you smiled against his lips. He had laid with you for a while before getting up, grabbing his discarded shirt and wiping you down before taking you into his arms again and falling asleep. He held you close to his chest, both of you naked under your blankets as the moonlight glowed against the two of you.

The next morning, he drove you to the closest drug store. The both of you walked to the counter smelling like each other as he paid for a Plan B pill and snacks. It was a story you and him laughed about on the rooftop of your house the night you both graduated from Pym Academy.

CHAPTER 2- THEN: THE CANON

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dragon-chica · 2 years

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Enid Sinclair - Heat (NSF W)

Fandom: Wednesday

You asked, and now I deliver.

Enid will tell you, by far the worst thing about being a werewolf is having to deal with heats. Even before she was able to transform she still had to suffer through them.

When she was younger and they first started it was bad enough, a 3 week period of bleeding and hormones and feeling like absolute shit. That was supposed to change when she got older, and it did. It got worse.

Now she goes from bleeding, and hormones, and feeling like absolute shit to all of that plus a burning fever, a deep and primal yearning for a mate, and the endless urge to hump something until it breaks. And break it again.

When you got together, Enid fell in love with you fast and hard. In no time she was writing 'Y/n my Mate' in hearts instead of just 'Y/n + Enid' in hearts and daydreaming about your life down the road together.

When she first thought to herself that maybe you'd even spend her heat with her, she popped that bubble quick and shook it out of her head. no. that would be dangerous and bad.

She could hurt you, she could scare you off, she's broken her bed frame on her own before and could definitely break you by accident. That would so not be a good way to convince you she'd be a great mate.

Her plan was great. Her plan was safe. She was going to ignore you for her entire heat so she couldn't be mean to you (when it's just starting she can say some hurtful things, bad enough for her brothers to shut up and could make Wednesday proud), and no way of her hurting you.

It was great.

Until you showed up at her dorm and she wanted to cry because her mate was here and wanted to take care of her and she did start crying and you held her in your arms because you're the best mate ever and then she thought maybe it would be okay for you to stay for a few days. Until she gets worse.

She swore she would make you leave once her heat really started coming into effect. For now you could comfort her and hold her and it'd be no problem, that alone honestly did bring her a lot of relief, you being by her side and caring for her.

Her plan was sound. And you're so doting and wonderful and the perfect mate that a little part of her purposely ignored the signs and she snuggled into your embrace and breathed in your scent

When she woke up it was already too late.

The heat in her room was unbearable, her silky pajamas felt like sandpaper but the only thing that really mattered was getting release.

She had started growling in her sleep awhile before, teeth longer and having gone from nuzzling into your neck to scraping her fangs long it and saliva drooling down against you.

The shift in her had been quick, cuddling against you had turned to her still sleeping form purposely pining you to the bed beneath her, and by the time Enid woke up your leg was soaked from her humping your thigh.

She adjusts herself for a better angle to drag along your leg, pressing closer for more friction and groans.

She swore she would kick you out, but now the thought of you trying to leave has her seeing red without you even having moved.

"Mine" she growls into your ear and picks up her pace, claws coming out and pressing against you, pricking into her mattress as she chases her high enough to have the bed shaking.

She cums with a low drawl out groan that makes your throat go dry. Aftershocks leave her twitching while bent over you, her hair is a sweaty mess and hot breaths panting in your face and for a moment you think she feels better, that she got some relief.

"Fuck me." She looks up at you with blown pupils and crazed eyes, her voice gravely and deep like you have never heard before and the moment to admire her is too long because she adds "Fuck me, or I'll make you fuck me myself."

You've never seen Enid so frenzied and you're not sure you'll be allowed to make it out of this alive, and when she yanks you into sitting up, sharp claws shredding through your shirt and nicking your flesh while she tries to tear your pants, you're not sure if you care about that either.

When she really goes into heat, she wants it rough. She will use you and bruise you without noticing, the burn between her legs and need for more clouds out everything else.

Her werewolf strength is out without meaning to be, she doesn't even notice.

She wants to scent you, she wants to be drowned in your scent, she wants you to bite her.

It doesn't matter that you're not a werewolf, you're her mate and that's all that matters. Sink your teeth into her and her moan will almost become a howl of ecstasy.

She craves all of you, kisses and plain closeness too, but that's just as harsh with her teeth knocking against yours and a bruising kiss after another.

Usually Enid's moans and whines are extremely cute, high pitched and sweet, in her heat she sounds like a rabid animal with her voice in a worked up growl.

Almost forgets your name and couldn't care less about hers, calls you her Mate, chanting the word as she rides you, staring into your eyes.

Anything you say is lost to the blood rushing in her ears.

She wants you to fuck her as hard as you can, soft and sweetness can be for every other time, in her heat you will either give her what she needs or she will get it by herself.

She craves closeness, needing you pressed against her, wants you to pin her down, press you both into the mattress and be as close as possible. She needs you.

Normally she loves when you eat her out but there's not time for that, fuck her or fist her but your arm hurt so much.

Her claws are out the entire time, your back is shredded and stings no matter how you move, her mattress needs replaced and there's gashes in the wall.

She can go for a few hours straight before she calms down enough to rest, and even then she's in a heart eyed bliss and doesn't want you to leave her side.

If she even thinks you're going to leave her she will be up in an instant and ask "Where do you think you're going?" "You're not trying to leave me are you? ARE YOU?" extremely possessive but if you don't get some water she might actually be the death of you.

When she finally calms down you're too sore to move and she seems blissfully content, laying with her head over your heart and sounding like she's purring, a sweet smile on her face and long fluttering lashes as she's falling asleep.

Luckily for your lifeline, her heat is significantly shorter when riding it out with someone and getting what she craves instead of by herself.

The morning after she's finally come to her senses, the heat wearing off to a bearable pulse and back in her right mind, Enid is horrified.

Her room smells horrible, her bed looks like carnage of a wild animal's attack, and you, oh god.

She panics not knowing what she did and wakes you up and you expect she's ready for another round, when you actually did collapse a few hours prior, but instead she's looking over you panicked, seeing her claw marks, bruises littering your skin, her fluids all over you...

In that stressed out observation she also feels quite a bit of pride before being horrified with herself again and running out to get a first aid kit and some water.

In the bathroom she catches her reflection in the mirror and her face, which had finally calmed with her fever gone, turns bright cherry and she can't help but stare at herself a moment, hands clutching the small first aid box tight enough for the plastic to crack.

There's numerous bite marks along her shoulders and neck, some dark bruises and some healing punctures and she remembers demanding you bite her harder. Harder. Heat crawls up her neck just thinking around it.

Her own hips have fading bruises, her lips and positively swollen and she looks mussed as if she'd been in a fight. There's hickeys down her chest and really everywhere else, scratches down her back from your nails and she realizes that she's completely nude.

And despite the fact she's been that since her true heat started, she lets out a cute "eep!" you hear from the other room and chuckle because she's back.

When she returns she's thrown on an oversized shirt and you almost want to laugh at her sudden modesty.

She can't stop apologizing while patching you up, but you're just relieved it's over and barely staying awake trying to tell her it's okay.

You feel like you just went through a speedrun of the opposite of No Nut November and are glad werewolves only go into heat once a year.

Enid notes that she feels better than she ever has before after a heat, not just that the aching need is receding, but was actually taken care of, satisfied. The ache between her thighs is burning, her clit and pussy are definitely swollen, but she feels wonderful.

"is there like, some kind of steroid or potion I can get so I can try and keep up with you next time?" you weakly ask, half joking and half pleading that there is.

"Next time" is ringing in her head, you already plan on spending her next heat with her, her heart feels like bursting and if you weren't looking like you were on death's doorstep she'd jump your bones again right now.

You are sore. Full body muscle aches sore and exhausted, for at least two weeks afterwards while Enid's bounced back to normal within a day of it ending.

She's very apologetic and tries to do everything she can to help you out so you don't strain yourself further.

You definitely get teased for the most obvious, worn out, 'morning week after' but you can't really bring yourself to care.

You may want to thank your lucky stars that it'll still be a few years until she fully transforms during her heat.

#Enid Sinclair x reader #Enid Sinclair imagine #Wednesday x reader #Wednesday imagine #Enid Sinclair #my stuff

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yandere-writer-momo · 9 months

Text

Baki 12 days of Christmas… an angsty yandere for @justamegafan. Merry Christmas!!

The mc is Hanayama’s arranged fiancée who he hates (at first). A trope I will never stop writing until I’m shot dead on the spot

Yandere Baki Shorts: A Christmas Carol

Yandere Hanayama Kaoru x Afab Reader

TW: Angst, mentioned character death (spoiler), Yandere, and mention of terminal illness

Hanayama often found his fiancée scuttling around his office like a little crab. She was such a skittish thing, with big, innocent eyes and a soft voice. She was weak, something Hanayama disliked most in a partner. And she always tried her best to get to know him… today was no exception

“Can we please spend Christmas together? Just this once?” Hanayama sighed when she stared up at him with her doe like eyes. Why couldn’t she get the hint that he wanted to be left alone?

“This is merely an arrangement by our families, I could care less about your feelings and the stupid holidays.” Hanayama ran a hand through his dark locks. “You’re bothering me so I suggest you leave.”

Hanayama ignored the soft sobs that escaped her lips and he didn’t even cast her a glance when she wished him a soft “Happy holidays.” The door quietly shut behind her and he went back to work. At least she could shut the door properly.

Hanayama shoved the Christmas cookies she made him into the trash beside his desk and continued to work on his paperwork. Hopefully this was the last time he’d ever have to deal with her… he couldn’t stand this arrangement but he kept with it because he wanted to honor his deceased mother’s wishes. Hanayama knew he could never grow to love the meek woman no matter how hard he tried, she’d break if he so much as touched her. She was far too fragile for him.

When it finally became night, Hanayama decided to retire for the night. The yakuza went to lay down in his bed but the screen door to his room suddenly opened and a cold, winter breeze blew in. What on earth?

“Hello.” Hanayama nearly jumped out of his skin when a ghostly apparition stood at the foot of his bed. The youthful face of his mother stared back at him which left his mouth gaping like a fish. “It’s been so long…”

“M-mom?” Hanayama reached out for the figure but she gently put his hands down. She was as cold as ice… “Why are you here?”

“We need to go for a walk… a nice, long walk.” His mother gave him a soft smile as she lead him around towards the door of his room. “A walk in the past.”

“The past… what do you mean?”

“Well, I’m the ghost of Christmas past.” His mother smiled as the walls of the compound began to change to the ones he was familiar with when he was a child. What kind of magic was this? How was this even possible? “You need to be reminded of your origins…”

Hanayama was shocked to see himself as a child crying as he sat beside his mother in the old family room. The ghost beside him pointed to the red welt on her human body’s face. “I used to beg your father to stay with me every once and awhile… to spend time with us as a family.”

Hanayama frowned as he watched the image play out of his mother. How could he forget that his mother had begged to spend time with his father when he was younger… perhaps he had blocked all those memories out since he had to become the leader of the yakuza at a young age? “This was the Christmas where I found out I had cancer… I really wanted to spend time with him since my time was running out…”

The ghost shook her head and lead Hanayama back to his room once she felt as if he understood her point.

The ghost held Hanayama’s hand. “You’ve grown so much… you look just like your father.”

Hanayama went to hold the ghost but she pushed him back, “and you’re just like your father.”

“Wait! Please don’t go-“ the figure of his mother was gone in a flash which left him clutching his chest in sorrow. Why did his mom leave so fast… wasn’t she proud that he’s taken over the family? Why did she show him such an image?

“It’s been awhile, Hanayama.” Hanayama froze when he noticed the ghostly figure of Retsu standing at his door. “It seems that it’s my turn with you as the ghost of Christmas Present.”

Hanayama was silent in thought. Retsu had just passed away recently yet… why would he be here? Retsu had nothing to do with his life…

Retsu waved Hanayama to follow him and Hanayama obliged. The two walked in silence until they stopped in front of a small room in the furthest corner of the compound. Retsu placed a hand on the screen door which made it into a mirror that they could see inside… (your name) sat in her room violently coughing.

“You know I was her best friend when I was alive.” Retsu whispered as he turned to look at Hanayama. “She’s dying, you know.”

Hanayama froze in shock. (Your name) was dying… she was dying. Why hadn’t she told him she was sick? Why- Hanayama was drawn out of his thoughts when Retsu held up a hand. The Chinese man frowned at Hanayama. “You don’t listen to her so she’s never told you… she needs new lungs.”

Hanayama placed a hand on the doorway when he saw her hold up a handkerchief full of blood. She was so fragile… just like his mother. And he had been so cruel to her. How could he-

“I was planning on confessing to her once I beat Musashi.” Retsu shared with Hanayama as he went into the room and sat beside (your name). She obviously couldn’t see Retsu as she softly cried. “I was in love with her.”

Hanayama clenched his fists as he watched Retsu drape a blanket around (your name)’s shoulders which made her look around the room in surprise. The man turned to Hanayama with a frown. “But my own pride ruined everything… I just want her to be happy.”

“… did you come here to gloat in my face?”

“No. She didn’t feel the same way.” Retsu smiled at Hanayama as he combed his fingers through (your name)’s hair. The ghost smiled sadly. “It’s so unfair… she deserves so much better than you.”

Hanayama was offended despite how correct Retsu was… he truly didn’t deserve (your name). She was always kind and sweet to him despite how many times he pushed her away over the years. She was undaunted by his rejection and still tried to get to know him… he should give it another chance. He should do something wonderful for her tomorrow…

Retsu rested his ghostly head on (your name)’s shoulder with a sad sigh. He pressed a parting kiss to her shoulder which made her glance around the room in confusion. The man then lead Hanayama back to his room. “I’m sorry… my feelings started to get in the way of what I was meant to show you. You’ll be visited by one last ghost, the ghost of Christmas future.”

Hanayama went to say something to Retsu but he was gone in a flash. The yakuza stood in the center of the room in confusion. One more ghost… who on earth could that be?

Hanayama then felt a sudden chill run down his spine as the room before him melted away into that of a grave yard. A ghastly figure in a black cloak that covered their body floated into the room. A skeletal hand was placed on his shoulder while the other pointed at a gravestone with (your name)‘s name on it. No… (your name) would die? She couldn’t die… she was so young.

Hanayama didn’t even have time to think before the ghost snapped their fingers and showed Hanayama a much older of himself who sat hunched over his desk. The older version sobbing as he held his head. What on earth had happened?

“You never found love again after she died.” The ghost whispered into his ear. “You actually went insane with guilt and it made your yakuza family fall apart.”

Hanayama watched this foreign version of him chug down an entire bottle of whiskey as he held a picture in his hand… it was a wedding picture of him and (your name)… they were meant to get married in a few months… so this must be a few years from now.

“I didn’t know… I didn’t know…” the other version of Hanayama whispered as he pressed his forehead against the picture. “I’m so sorry… I’m sorry.”

Hanayama frowned at how his office was in disarray. This wasn’t like him at all… why on earth was his office so messy?

“She kept all your paperwork organized. She’d sneak into your office when you were asleep to try to help you out since you’re not every good with numbers.” The ghost chuckled bitterly. “She as such a stupid woman… falling in love with a man as selfish as you.”

Hanayama gasped when the ghost pulled up the hood over their head to reveal (your name). Except there was no warmness in her eyes nor was there her tender smile. Why did she look so cold… why did she look at him with such eyes full of resentment? She loved him…

“This is your future. My future.” The ghost told him with a sigh. “You have to change, Hanayama.”

Hanayama but his lip as he stared at the sobbing figure of his future self. He didn’t want to be so pathetic…

“What do I have to do?” Hanayama asked the ghost who frowned at him. She didn’t say a word as she walked away. Hanayama went to follow her but the hallways began to distort and show Hanayama a different ghost of (your name) who sat side by side with the ghost Retsu. They looked so happy… she wasn’t supposed to be with Retsu. She was his. “Wait! Where are you going?”

Many images of the way he’s treated his fiancée flashed by him as he hopelessly chased after the ghost. Her teary face and bloody handkerchief now haunted him… he didn’t want her to suffer anymore. Hanayama didn’t want her to die… she couldn’t die. And he certainly didn’t want his wife to be with another man. No. She was his… (your name) belonged to him.

“There’s nothing you can do.” The ghost told him as she gave him a soft smile that was eerily similar to the ones his (your name) gave him. “Now wake up.”

And that’s when Hanayama fell into a dark bottomless pit. The large man couldn’t even utter a sound before he woke up in his bed. His body was covered in sweat and his eyes were wide in horror. A nightmare…

Hanayama’s hands grabbed at his body in shock before he gave a laugh full of disbelief escaped him. He was alive… he was fine…

Hanayama shot out of bed and quickly made his way towards (your name)’s room. He had to make sure she was alive… he had to make sure she was okay.

Hanayama slammed the door open to (your name)’s room which scared the poor girl out of her wits. She was already dressed for the day and was shocked to see Hanayama in his pajamas.

“O-oh. I’m sorry. Did I do something wrong-“ (your name) was shocked when Hanayama pulled her into a hug. The giant man pressed kissed all over her cheeks with passionate fervor.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Hanayama chanted as he ran his thumbs over her soft cheeks. “Let’s spend Christmas together.”

(Your name) couldn’t utter a single word out before she was whisked out of her room and brought to the dining room she had always wanted to sit at with him. What was going on? Had Hanayama gone insane? She was going to leave him alone just like he had wanted… so why did he have this sudden change of heart.

Hanayama had his servants quickly prepare a gran breakfast for the two of them. His large hand held hers close to his chest. The yakuza boss pressed kisses all over her knuckles as he waited for their food.

“I won’t ever ignore you again. We’ll spend every meal together and you can move into my room…” Hanayama gave her a soft smile. “And I’ll pay for your medicine, okay? You can get that procedure-“

“I-I never told you I was sick.” (Your name) whispered as she tried to pull her hand away. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything for me-“

(Your name) gasped when Hanayama suddenly pulled her onto his lap and pressed his lips against hers in a searing kiss. His dark eyes never let hers. “Nonsense… I’m going to be a good fiancé from now on and an even better husband.”

Hanayama’s hands began to explore her curves as a different kind of hunger filled his eyes. “I’ll take care of your every need from now on… because you’re mine.”

Rather than change for the better, he had changed for the worse

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notyour-valentine · 2 years

Text

I'd do anything to make you stay (dark!Tommy x Reader)

[Masterlist] [Taglist]

Summary: First, she wished to leave, then she felt it was her duty to leave, then she was desperate to leave until she realised she was forced to stay.

Note: This was written for @noforkingclue and her 2.5 k celebration. Congratulations once again. I hope you have as much fun reading this as I had writing it! I tried my hand at dark! Tommy, but in a more conniving, subtle way and used the implicit prompt of "I'd do anything to make you stay" and the explicit prompt of "I have nothing I could offer you"

I do not consent to my work being translated, copied or posted elsewhere on this platform or any other. This hasn't been beta'd so I apologise for typos or mistakes

Warning: Gun, manipulation, controlling behaviour, obsession (18/21+)

Wordcount: 5033 words

"So that means, I have to leave.", She announced, slightly out of breath from the strength it took to say these words.

For a moment, there was silence. Then it was Ms Burgess who spoke up.

"So we will have to find someone new?", She sighed in annoyance. "This hassle is the last thing we need with the wedding coming up."

Her tone made her swallow hard, turning her eyes to the floor.

"Grace, leave the girl be.", Mr. Shelby argued. His tone softened, when he returned to her.

"Congratulations.", He offered. "We wish you and your fiancé all the best."

His soft smile made relief wash over her.

"Thank you for letting us know so that we have time to plan in finding a replacement, even if we are sad to see you go. You are incredible with Charlie."

That was why they had hired her.

She wasn't a governess, and no nanny or nurse either. In fact, she was only a trained housemaid, but once Mr. Shelby had found out she had three younger siblings of her own, he had hired her as Charlie's caretaker, deeming her qualifications as a sister more important than those from some college or school.

Ms Burgess had disagreed at first, but the little boy had taken to her.

And now with Ms Burgess focussed on nothing but the wedding, Charlie grew ever more attached to her.

He was a beautiful boy, so soft and gentle. Other children raged with tantrums, but only ever cried when he was frightened, hungry or exhausted. He loved to be held and always tried to hold onto a part of her in return, her hair, her hand, the fabric of her clothes.

And he was getting strong fast.

Having to leave him would break her heart but before long she'd have a bunch of children of her own.

Mr Shelby had always been kind to her. Occasionally he would bend the rules or show the occasional kindness, like sending her a car to pick her up from the station after her day off, or keeping back a slice of blackberry pie only because she had once mentioned that she adored it.

Perhaps it was because she knew their secret. It was obvious, really. The way he held and watched the boy, who on paper was nothing but his fiancée's son, gave it all away. But it wasn't her place to judge so she didn't.

And she always greeted him with a smile whenever he would join her in the nursery or outside in the gardens, or when she would bring the boy to him before putting him to sleep.

This would have been the beginning of goodbye, only it wasn't.

When she visited home a few weeks later, she was met with the shocking news that her fiancé had married someone else and moved away with her to London.

The heartbreak was bad, but the shame was worse.

"I see.", Mr. Shelby said, when she sat in his home office in front of him, her cheeks wet as she tried very hard to keep her voice composed.

The sudden ending of her engagement meant she needed employment once more and it made her cheeks burn to ask for it.

Mr. Shelby sighed deeply, smoke escaping his lips.

"We have already found someone.", He mumbled, making her heart drop.

He was a good employer and paid well, but she couldn't blame him, could she now?

"However, the change wouldn't be good for Charlie. You may continue your employment here."

Relief made her sniffle once more.

"Now, now. No more of that, eh?", He insisted, getting up and walking around the desk.

From his own suit pocket, he produced his handkerchief and dabbed her cheeks gently.

"There. I know all too well how betrayal by someone you thought you loved hurts.", He said, his voice even softer than it normally was when speaking to her.

His hand lingered on the side of her face from where it had tilted her face upward.

It was so warm, and his eyes, those eyes the other servants claimed to be cold, were filled with nothing but compassion.

His thumb traced her cheekbone.

"But let me promise you this: while it is a hard lesson, it is a lesson you will never forget."

A lot of people had said a lot of things in the last few days, and she hadn't believed them. In a way, she didn't really believe that a man like him could have his heart broken too, but here he was, admitting it to her. And somehow she knew it was the truth.

He only removed his hand when Ms Burgess entered, visibly upset about some order of flowers.

Their wedding was shortly after Christmas and yet she wanted non-seasonal floral arrangements, which proved to be rather difficult.

"Congratulations, Mr Shelby.", She offered when she saw him in the corridor.

He turned in the spot, seeing her beam at him with the basket of clean laundry in her arm.

"What are you doing with that, eh?", He asked.

"Pitching in."

A lot of things had fallen off the edge in light of all the work that had to be done to make sure today would be absolutely perfect.

"That's not your job.", He reminded her.

Without another word, he took it from her hands.

"I'm glad to help. A lot of the maids are too busy.", She argued. "I'd feel awful if I didn't help at least a little bit."

Once she had placed the sheets in the large wardrobe in the corridor and the towels in the appropriate bathrooms, all absolutely perfect for the guests.

"I can take that now.", She assured him. "You are probably missed downstairs."

Mr. Shelby scoffed and shook his head.

"They can drink my champagne on their own."

So he followed her back in the nursery where she took over from Jane, the maid who had actually been supposed to take care of the towels. But she had been on her feet since three a.m. that morning so a little chance to sit and get a bite to eat was more than welcome.

"Sorry, Mr. Shelby.", She said at once.

"'s alright.", He assured her as he sat down on the other chair.

Still, Jane rushed to leave, leaving the three of them.

"Shall we show your father how well you are doing with your walking, Charlie?", She asked, kneeling down in front of the boy before turning to the father again.

"He can almost do it on his own."

Giving Charlie one hand of hers to hold, while the other was braced against the wall, he could hold his balance.

Then step by step, he moved forward towards his toy horse.

With a soft smile, Mr. Shelby crouched down too, opening his arms.

"Come here, Charlie!", He encouraged, making the boy change directions. That meant he had to abandon the safety of the wall.

Her hand went to his other hand, but Mr. Shelby shook his head.

"Let him try with one hand.", He instructed and so she did.

Charlie leaned heavily into her arm, but kept taking his steps, until he was in his father's arms.

"Well done. Now back again.", He instructed, offering Charlie only one hand to hold onto.

And once more Charlie made his way across the small space between them.

As she stretched out her hands, she glanced up and saw his eyes, focussed not on his son, but on her. And she smiled before focussing her attention back on that darling little boy.

The bad news came in the middle of chaos, although chaos seemed to be their constant state. Right after the wedding, the new Mrs Shelby was determined to start working on the foundation. While Mr Shelby’s money was the ticket into polite society, this work would keep them there, of that she was sure and so she poured every waking minute into it, and everytime she came to ask if perhaps she wanted to join her on a walk with Charlie or bathe or feed him, she was turned away. Some days, Mr Shelby saw him more than his mother did and that was saying something.

And so it was him she turned to, with the letter in hand.

He leaned back against the windowsill as he read through what her mother had written.

“How old is your aunt?”, he wanted to know.

“Thirty - six.”, she responded, wringing her hands.

“And now your mother wants you to go and help her?”

She nodded.

“She can’t possibly do the household chores with a broken hip, and rear four children, Sir.”

“No, she can’t.”, he said with a sigh before sitting down at his desk.

For a moment, he seemed to consider the implications, then he nodded.

“And you’d take that on? Four children and a household, all the while playing nurse?”

That wasn’t a difficult question at all.

“Of course, Sir! I don’t want to leave, but it’s family. That's what family is supposed to do."

Her words brought a hint of a smile to his lips.

“That is very kind of you.”, he told her, making her cheeks flush. “But the truth is, I don’t want to see you go. I think it would be bad for Charlie.”

All softness had gone from his voice and he met her gaze with the same determination she had seen him use with his brothers

She opened her mouth to argue, but he waved her off.

“But since I understand your situation, and the conflict it brings, I would like to make you an offer.”

Those demanding blue eyes met hers again and she shuddered in anticipation.

“I’ll pay for your aunt to hire some woman from the village to take care of her household and children. And I will increase your pay by 15% as I know you send all your earnings back to your family so that your mother won’t have to work so much. That increase would let her take another day off about another day a week, no? During that time she too can help your aunt.”

“Mr. Shelby-”, she insisted breathlessly, “that’s too much to ask! I couldn’t possibly accept that!”

But he only shook his head.

“Don’t you worry. You just stay right here and tend to Charlie. The costs of letting you go would be far higher, to all of us.”

She tried to argue once more, but he wouldn’t have it and instead sent her off with a small smile, feeling dizzy from her luck.

It was awful. No, it was worse than awful. It was horrific.

Mrs Shelby had been so proud, so happy when it came time to leave for the foundation dinner, only to -

She hadn’t believed it at first, not even when Mary told her. Only when bit by bit, the Shelbys came home.

It took three days for anyone to spy Mr. Shelby.

There had been strict instructions from his sister that no one was to talk to him, not even to offer their condolences. He wouldn’t want that.

There was some comfort though, as Charlie seemed blissfully oblivious to everything, babbling and playing, giggling whenever she sung “This is how the Lady rides” and bounced him on her lap. She had been doing that when she saw him standing in the door and profusely apologised, with a burning face and a tightening chest.

It had been on the mourning of the fourth day. He was wearing nothing but a working man's shirt and old saddleworn trousers, his eyes red and his cheeks sunken.

The poor man had lost his wife and here she was making his son laugh until he was breathless.

It just wasn’t right. It couldn’t be right.

But instead of scolding her, of screaming or even striking her for her inappropriate behaviour, he had only ever placed a hand on her arm to sooth her, crouched down beside his son, stroked his hair and asked her to continue.

It hadn’t been easy, at least not until Charlie was laughing again, but when she brought him up again, he had thrown himself into her chest, his whole body trembling with giggles.

But Mr. Shelby hadn’t minded. Instead, he had only watched, his hand staying on her arm, his eyes on his son.

“You’re a Godsend.”, he had called her on that fourth day before leaving, the hand moving to cup her cheek. And then he was gone.

But he returned on the fifth day, and on the sixth and seventh and on every day thereafter, joining her in the nursery.

Sometimes, he’d hold his son, sometimes he’d help her dress him or hold him or feed him. Sometimes he preferred to watch.

But he always returned.

For weeks it went like this, and she was the only person apart from his son, sister and aunt that he talked to. And the only adult he looked in the eyes while doing it.

She had seen him shrug off his aunt’s hand on his arm, while his own found her shoulder or back, brushed against her fingers as they exchanged toys or clothes, just as he never really met his sister’s eyes, while they didn’t shy away from hers.

A godsend, he called her, a blessing, a stroke of luck, once even saying that she was the only thing that still held all this together.

She had tried to argue, but he had insisted. She cared for Charlie and that was all that mattered now. He hadn’t allowed her room for argument in that, and in his situation, she couldn’t blame him for putting his son above all others.

“Without you, all this would fall apart.”, he had said and she hadn’t even considered leaving, until it was her only thought- from one night to the other.

It was the noise that woke her, the shouting and slamming of doors.

Her eyes darted to the door that connected her small bedroom to Charlie's nursery, before she remembered that he was staying with Mr. Shelby's older brother and his wife.

Wrapping a scarf around her shoulders, she stepped out of her bedroom in search of the cause for this commotion.

In the chilly darkness of the corridor, she could hear them long before she could see them, arguing in the hall.

"Listen to me- eh!", Mr. Shelby roared, but stopped talking as soon as he heard her approaching.

She could see him standing close to the foot of the stairs, wearing crumpled trousers, his bare chest revealing tattoos she had never known him to have, his dark hair ruffled.

Her eyes followed his outstretched hand to a woman who was standing in the middle of the hall.

She had never seen her before but it wasn't difficult to place her, after all, a Russian Duchess as a houseguest made the rounds quickly.

She was wearing Mr. Shelby's coat and little more, her messy dark hair fell down her shoulders, her dark makeup was slightly smudged and her black eyes shone in the darkness.

"Oi,", he called out, "Back to bed, now!", He ordered and she was about to obey, when the Duchess laughed and stretched her arm out, and in it she held a gun, casually as if it was a pen.

All air was knocked from her lungs and she froze.

"You there, pour us a drink!", She insisted.

Her heart thundered in her chest, as she felt hawkish dark eyes locking in on her.

When her dark lips turned into a smile, she felt her stomach coil.

"No, get back to bed!", Mr. Shelby insisted.

Her eyes darted back and forth between them. She knew his word was final, but he wasn't the one with the gun.

"I told you to come here!", the Duchess snarled, her voice strained with impatience.

Her chest tightened as she felt frightened tears come to her eyes.

Her whole body trembled as she took a few uncertain steps forward, not daring to take her eyes away from the woman.

She had barely reached the middle of the stairs, when Mr Shelby stopped her, blocking her descent with his body as his hand found her waist, feeling her body tremble.

"Go to bed.", He told her. "Go."

"She has a gun.", She whimpered, blinking the tears away.

"You should listen to her, Tommy!", the Duchess giggled.

While glancing down, she saw her twirl her hair around the gun as if it was nothing.

"You know in Russia, the lady of the house took care to have pretty maids and ugly nannies.", She chirped, as if this was as casual a setting as a lesson in good manners.

It made her heart beat so fast she feared it would rip through her chest. Either that or give out forever.

But it was a desperate, almost painful hope that made her look up through teary eyes at the only other person in the room, the only person that might save her.

He’d tell her she was wrong, he’d take the gun from her, he’d make her stop.

Mr. Shelby's jaw tightened, but he kept his distance, his eyes following the gun.

"The only men who had pretty nannies were the widowers. That way there were no problems."

"Come on!", Mr. Shelby insisted, practically pushing her back up the stairs, while blocking the Duchess from sight, his hand burning in her back and arm.

But he couldn't stop her from hearing the other woman's venom.

"I do wonder why you hired your pretty little nanny far before your wife died."

"Go, go. It's alright.", He promised, as they came close to the top. "Go to bed. I won't let her bother you."

She ran the last few steps, and as soon as she was around the corner she pressed herself against the wall, but even that didn't still her trembling hands.

Move, she told herself. Go. Hide. Do as he said.

But her body had developed a will of its own, trembling like a leaf and frozen to the spot, as if all its strength was focussed on not crying out in fear or sobbing in desperation. She clasped a hand over her mouth and tried to calm her breathing.

She could still hear them arguing, the Duchess teasing and Mr. Shelby trying to calm her down.

"I thought it was me you wanted to dress up as her but it was that little thing up there all along.", She heard and her hand muffled her whimper.

It was as if the Duchess had ripped open a drawer of her memory and had spread their contents all over the floor, forcing her to pick them all up again, look them over and rearrange them.

Only on second glance, in this light, they all looked different, not explicit but doubtful.

He had always been a good and kind employer, but what if there was some truth in what the Duchess had said?

What if there even was a hint?

It wasn't right- it couldn't be right.

And she couldn't allow herself to be pulled in.

So she had kept an eye out, wrote her letters, a few to the announcements in the papers, and another to him to explain her reasoning.

It was easier to write than saying it to his face. But of course, she couldn't hope to evade him forever.

Mr Sheoby came while they were spending some time outside, sitting in the open air on a thick woollen blanket, both her and Charlie bundled up against the lingering yet fading winter cold.

The first flowers had begun to come out now, and not even this place could escape the wind of change that carried spring each year.

Beside her, Charlie was busy playing with the little wooden cubes, happily babbling to himself. That made it hard- harder than it should have been.

She heard the steps before she saw the shadow, easily identifiable to her. She still could not meet his eyes, even if it was rude.

When she didn't react to his satisfaction, he decided to clear his throat.

"Might I join?", He asked impatiently.

"Of course, Mr. Shelby. I'm sure you son would like that."

He sat down far too close to her for her liking, the fabric of his trousers almost brushing against her knee in the process.

Instead of paying attention to Charlie, he simply stared at her.

She didn't do him the favour of looking at him. She couldn’t. Her cheeks were burning with shame.

"I gather you received my letter.”, she whispered, taking a deep breath to brace herself for whatever was to come now.

"Good.", She said, staring straight ahead, to the trees and the river that lay beyond.

"I've decided to reject it."

He said it without anger, without malice. At best, he sounded annoyed that he had to deal with it in the first place, like she had somehow stretched the limitations of his patience with her request.

"You can't reject a resignation.", She insisted.

"Well I fucking do.", He said, sounding more exhausted than angry.

She took a shaky breath and focussed on the treeline. Her hands had begun to tremble again and so she clutched the fabric of her dress.

"I understand, you're upset and you have every right to be but you are needed here.”

“I want to leave.”, she insisted.

Her voice cracked and she glanced away, clutching a hand over her mouth.

But she refused to cry in front of him.

"I understand.", He said, surprisingly gentle. "I understand your wish to leave, but I can't let that happen. So I'll let you draw up a number, any number, and I will see it in your account or your family's account by the end of the week. As high as you like. You could set them up for life if you want to.”

She felt like the ground had shifted under her once more and she was falling again.

"I am not a thing to be bought and paid for.", She hissed. "I am a person and as a person, I have the right to decide and I have decided not to continue my employment here."

With you.

He stared at her with that unreadable expression of his, those cold, unyielding eyes burning into her soul.

"Are you finished?", He asked, sounding almost bored once more. "Good."

She felt her heart clench as his words.

"I won't allow you to abandon Charles and that's the end of it.", he merely stated.

"It's not yours to allow!", She said a little louder than she had intended, her voice thinning as her resolve slipped more and more.

Charlie's head peaked up and he looked to her, his own summer sky blue eyes staring at her.

"I will leave, Sir, and never come back.", She told him.

His jaw muscles tightened as he stared at her profile, his piercing gaze burning itself into her skin just like the memories of that night that burned themselves into her soul.

"I have to go now, but when I return, we talk."

"There is nothing to talk about.", She whispered as he got to his feet.

"We will talk when I return tomorrow.", He said sternly, before walking off.

Only Mr. Shelby didn’t return.

She had her suitcases packed and went down to the kitchens to retrieve the sandwiches Mrs O’Sullivan had promised her for her journey when she heard the whispers - Mr. Shelby was dead, beaten to death by thugs in the street.

It had shocked them all to their core, leaving them in paralysed uncertainty, and her in tears not for the man, but the little boy upstairs. Both parents dead within months was a harsh fate to suffer.

The truth had come later, in the form of Mrs. Thorne who had told her the truth of it. Mr Shelby was very badly hurt and might die. When she found out of her plans to leave, she had begged her to stay given the seriousness of the situation. Once they knew what would become of Mr. Shelby, they could decide what to do about a replacement.

And so she stayed, for Charlie’s sake. Otherwise he’d be left entirely without any constant person in his life and she couldn’t do that to him. But she should have done.

She had agreed with Mrs Thorne that she would stay until a decision for her replacement could be made and that meant until Mr Shelby was well enough to look through candidates again, which he actually began to do.

Once she saw that, she made preparations to leave in two weeks time.

Five days before her departure, he called her into his office.

"Have you found a new nanny for Charlie?", She asked, after sitting down across from him just like he had bid her.

Mr. Shelby shook his head.

"There's not much time left before I leave.", She told him.

His response came ever calm, ever cool.

"You won't leave."

Her heart skipped a beat.

"Mr. Shelby, we've been through this.", She said.

Too many times.

Slowly, Thomas Shelby turned back from the window and faced her, nodding towards a dark red file on his desk.

"What is that?", She asked.

"Take a read.", He said, leaning back and observing.

She felt her heart thunder as she reached for it, fearing for whatever would be found inside, but to her surprise it was a letter of enrolment to one of the best schools for young girls in the country, a school of higher education with excellent recommendation and frightening prices.

This letter was confirmation between the school and Mr. Shelby that the payment for the full enrollment of her sisters until their respective ages of graduations had been paid for.

She stared up at him wide-eyed but before she could form any response he nodded towards the folder.

“Keep reading.”, she demanded.

She turned the page and skimmed the words.

Next, she found another letter, this time to a name painfully familiar to her, a name she had heard all her life and one she had up to this point associated with kindness and generosity, with understanding of their situation.

It was the name of her landlord, or rather the man that owned the land her family lived on and farmed.

And unlike the previous letter, this deal had been sent and answered, confirming that the ownership had been transferred from him to Mr. Shelby, with an agreement not to inform the tenants and asking what was to be done about it- if they really had to remove them from the property.

The authentic signature was like a stab to her stomach and the blood in her ears began to rush.

As she had read, Mr. Shelby had moved across the desk to lean against it.

"You see that there are two ways this can go?", He asked, calmly, as her chest began to tighten.

Her lip began to tremble and she forced her burning eyes shut.

“As long as you stay here, your sisters will be taken care of. Your mother won’t need to pay a dime in rent while I will make sure they have every comfort and renovation they could possibly want. Or…-”

He needn’t spell it out.

His hand found her shoulders in an almost reassuring manner, as if he was the source of her comfort and not the sole cause of her troubles.

He took the file from her shaking hands, placing it back on his desk amongst countless others- another box ticked business deal completed.

"I knew you'd understand."

The way he sounded, filled with not just pride but relief, made her sick to her stomach.

He continued holding her shoulders between his hands as if to ease her tension, letting her look out at the vast lands of the Arrow House Estate. She had once liked the fact that one could look for miles and see nothing.

"You belong here.", He told her as if it was meant to assure her.

"Please, Mr. Shelby.", She whispered, whimpered even as her tears began to fall.

“It’s not right. It’s just not right. Let me go home. Please.”

He only sighed in response, so she tried once more. She had to.

“There are a thousand women like me, better suited to the task. Please Sir, think of your wife. She wouldn’t want-”

His grip tightened so suddenly it made her wince as he pulled her up to stand, spinning her around to face him.

She saw anger flash in his pale blue eyes, and froze as he placed a single fingers on her lips.

“Don’t.”, he said softly, and yet she wasn’t so foolish as to miss the warning that lay in them.

“You know this is for the best.”, he assured her, gentle once more as he began to stroke the tears from her cheeks.

When she shook her head, he held it between his hands until she couldn’t do so anymore.

"Why me?", She dared to ask, forcing the words out through trembling lips. “I have nothing I could offer you. Please!”

He seemed almost amused by her answer and gave his response in the way one would talk to a child.

"Because you are untouched by all the dirt, by all the filth. No blood on your hands. You are so pure."

She didn't feel pure now.

She felt filthy, body and soul.

Hot tears began to spill once more and instead of being appalled or angry, he pulled her into a tight, almost comforting embrace and let her cry, while gently stroking over the back of her head.

I should have left long ago, she thought bitterly, her fingernails digging into the palms of your hand. I should have left when you were weak and wounded and dying. I should have left and never looked back.

But she hadn’t. She had been too weak, too soft. And now it was too late.

"I know you're upset.", He soothed. "But I think you understand too. You know this is what's best for everyone. After all, I couldn't have you breaking Charlie's heart."

End.

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed and as always I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Taglist

Overall

@lilyrachelcassidy @jyessaminereads @chlorrox @watercolorskyy @books-livre @quarterpastmidnight @lilyevanswhore @polishcrazyone @zablife @just-a-harmless-patato @stevie75 @flyingjosephine-blog @runnning-outof-time @cillmequick @alex-in-the-wilderness @babayaga67 @butterfly-skinnylegend

Tommy

@knowledgefulbutterfly @babayaga67 @signorellisantichrist @lespendy @geeksareunique @look-at-the-soul

#tommy shelby #thomas shelby #dark! tommy shelby #dark!tommy #tommy shelby x reader #thomas shelby x reader #dark!tommy shelby x reader #dark!tommy x reader #dark!thomas shelby x reader #tatiana petrovna #dark!tatiana #tommy shelby imagine #thomas shelby imagine #valentineswritings #peaky blinders #i'd do anything to make you stay

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sleepyelliee · 6 months

Text

jack marston x reader.

before you read !

FEM reader, not really proofread, mostly contains fluff but mentions his parents and past, couple small mentions of the van der linde gang, reader is mentioned to have long hair that's normally braided - no specific hair color! no y/n used. this is my first time writing fanfiction like this, so lmk if I did an mistake or forgot to add another warning !! <3. also you're a farm girl !

credits.. @reddorkredemption for the Jack header! @/xxxbimbobunny @/v6que for the dividers.

<3.

your father always spoke about not to get yourself into wrong groups of people, he always mentioned to stay away from outlaws, gangs or bad men in general, to be aware of people whenever you go out in public because he claimed that people weren't always truthful about their status and reputation.

you always went along with his rules — he was right, there was always something on the newspaper you would receive in your mailbox of your ranch stating another missing girl or someone getting shot or killed. Normally, you would try to avoid any of those circumstances happening to you by staying in your ranch and helping out your father with duties along with your younger siblings.

That all changed when you met a certain boy around your age, Jack Marston. He was a lean man with a slightly muscular build, he seemed to be those cowboys from the past with his hat that was black and gray with a feather poking out from the brim ever so slightly, he always had a serious expression on his face and hardly ever shown a sign of vulnerability. You thought he was good looking, but you would never admit that to anyone with how he carries his gun around his hip in a threatening manner for someone who lived in a sheltered life like yours.

You didn't know how you managed to get yourself tangled into an *outlaw* — something you tried to avoid your whole life but here you were, laying in your bed as you fantasized about the young man and how cute he looked whenever he would visit your farm to buy different diary products off your father because how cheap the price was. This small crush you thought you had eventually became a *huge* and noticable crush as time went on and how often he would visit your families ranch.

....

The cold breeze brushed against your body as you wiped off sweat from your forehead, sighing as you felt the hard labor in today's work before you heard a familiar horse riding up into your ranch. Turning your gaze away from the horses you were taking care of today onto the young man deemed as a gunslinger.

"Hi, miss. Wonderin' if I could get eggs, sorry to disturb you, notice that your father wasn't out here today." He spoke, instantly sending butterflies into your stomach with his quiet grumble when he noticed that his horse wasn't staying put like he told it to be.

"Hey, mister, sorry to inform you but we are out of eggs recently." You muttered as you moved to stand where he was leaning against the fence. You swore you could feel his gaze on you for a brief moment, analyzing each move as your fingers moved to comb the messy strand of hair that managed to slip out of your braid.

Jack stayed quiet for a minute before nodding as he replied, "Alright, then. Thank you for ya help anyway." He soon started to walk away from the fence and mount onto his horse before he called out to you, "Have a great one, miss." Then he quickly left the ranch, the horses footsteps slowly but surely, going quieter as he rode into the distance.

...

Ever since that day, he has been visiting your ranch more and more often, sometimes even ordering large batches to keep the conversation going. You thought he was quiet, but he looked so memorized anytime you would speak about your day in your tired, raspy voice. Jack always claimed that it was just due to not wanting to go home because his *parents* grounded him. But even your younger siblings could've sworn that he had the biggest crush on you and they would tease you endlessly for it.

Your denial of liking or loving an outlaw was soon evaporating when he started to invite you out to different places. As time grew on, he soon found himself more comfortable to take you out to play Blackjack and have you comfortable in his lap, his free hand that wasn't holding the cards would protectively wrap around your waist and hold you close. Jack would soon also allow you to hold his guns, but he would make sure that you wouldn't accidentally pull the trigger and shoot yourself — he was afraid of loosing you too. You start to notice that the initial of your first name would be carved in all of his guns in the same exact spot — on end of each handle so it felt like he was holding you whenever you weren't with him.

God, what would your father think about when he found out about you and your gunslinger of a boyfriend? That question was always back of your mind each time you were with him.

Yet, you guys weren't really dating yet, he was very paranoid and protective of you. That's what you were trying to convince yourself to believe for a very long time before one late night when you were riding together.

...

Jack told you to get off your horse and told you that he had a surprise for you, something very out of the ordinary since most days he was much more direct of whatever he speaks about.

He takes your hand in his, interlocking each finger of yours with his rough hands as he shows you the beautiful stars above you. You were about to question his motives before you got caught off guard with a soft and gentle kiss on your cheek, almost jaw dropping from how gentle he was with you — let alone seeing him this vulnerable.

...

Soon enough, your relationship status was a secret, your father, friends nor your younger siblings knew you were with an outlaw most days. After all, you would simply lie and say you would hang out with your girl friends.

You never imagined to be visiting his ranch, or whatever you want to call it since the land was dry and it was quite dusty, also you noticed that there was hardly any animals living on that farm.

But here you were, sprawled out on his bed as he clung onto you like you were going to disappear magically at any moment as he muttered about the truth about his parents.

"...My mother? Well she...." Jack went silent like a lasso pulling at someone's throat, he was trying to suffocate a cry, to try not to look so vulnerable in front of his sweet girlfriend that he believed he didn't deserve. He knows he killed a man, he was an outlaw, a gunslinger, and a young boy raised in a gang before he became a monster he thought he was.

"Mhm." You hummed, listening to him speak as your free hand that wasn't wrapped around him combed through his black tangled locs. "it's okay, baby." Your lips found his forehead, pressing a couple kisses before you pulled away and rested your head on his chest. You tried to never push him to speak about his past whatsoever, you just listened most of the time and that's what he absolutely adored about you.

thank you sooo much for reading! sorry if this was kinda bad, this was my first time ever writing something like this. ALSO I HAD TO WRITE HIM SINCE THERE IS LITTLE TO BASICALLY NO WRITTING ABOUT HIM!! also, please don't post or copy my writing anywhere else. masterlist.

#adult jack marston #rdr2 john #red dead redemption two #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #red dead redemption community #red dead fandom #rdr1 #john marston #rai's rambles.#jack marston nation #rdr1 jack #jack marston x reader #jack marston #rdr2 x reader #fanfiction #rdr2 headcanons

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fatuismooches · 7 months

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hi! i love how you write all the harbingers. i thought of an angsty-but-more-like-pining idea of reader falling for one of dottore's clones and not the original dottore. the reader is unaware of the clone situation and the clone (being the rascal he is) neglects to tell them about it (he also just doesn't like the idea of sharing). despite the insanity and callous nature of the clone, the two of them are in a relatively loving relationship.

the original dottore becomes aware of it and is insanely jealous of his clone, yet he can't dispose of the clone without garnering suspicion from reader. if reader happened to fall in love with a younger clone, the original dottore is even more annoyed: "how did they fall for my younger, imperfect self instead of the now glorious, flawless me?"

i'm curious to hear what you think about this idea and the antics the original dottore has to go through to get to reader and, hopefully, get them to love the current him instead of a mimicry of his past self.

The segment would probably meet you on one of his expeditions outside of Snezhnaya, how you managed to woo Il Dottore is anyone's guess, and really no one could ever figure it out. He wouldn't tell you that he is Dottore of course, it would lead to far more complications and he'd rather not deal with those. Is that selfish? Yes of course but what did you expect?

Eventually, it would get to a point where the segment would convince you to move to Snezhnaya because continuing a relationship halfway across the world isn't very fulfilling for either of you, and he can't keep sending letters by crow much longer before he actually goes mad from not being able to feel your touch, to hear your sweet voice and soft, reassuring kisses. However, the segment's change in behavior is kind of noticeable because all of a sudden he's the one who wants to leave the lab for general errands. This is for a few reasons.

One, to see you obviously, he tries his best to be discreet about it but, how can he not want to indulge in you when you're nearly at his doorstep? Finally, he has a reliable way of destressing after all the annoyances at his "work." Two, because of the slight chance that you may one day see one of his other selves and decide to speak to them believing that it is your lover. Now of course this wouldn't be good because your lover knows very well of the... tendencies of his other segments, they would probably want to pick you apart (like he did) and then hog your body and attention once they get used to you.

But still Prime would find out, he was once his segments too, he knows the quirks. However never once would he have thought his segment would have found love in his life. He knows his segments tend to do their own thing but this? Pure ridiculousness. It's funny because he would try to deny the segment's feelings for you, and therefore simultaneously deny his own feelings in a way. If the segment happened to be a young one, he'd write it off as his younger self being desperate for attention and acceptance. If the segment happened to be closer in age to him, well... he'd find some excuse!

Regardless, he doesn't believe it. But it's hard to deny reality, when he sees how happy you are with his segment, and he sees how happy his segment is with you. And he thinks, what about you has his segment so captivated? You don't really look to be worthy of his time, but he still knows his segment well and he knows you have to be something out of the ordinary for him to take interest. (Yes he stalks the two of you, but trust me he's not going to hurt you. You're just confused as to why your lover seems to be intensely eyeing random locations behind him.)

In the beginning, Prime Dottore feels no real attachment to you, rather it's a sort of feeling that he can't seem to stay away from. Curiosity? Maybe. Jealousy? Of course not. Prime Dottore would try to keep putting it out of his mind, he has far more important things to do that take interest in his segment's "toy" but your face pops up more often than not sometimes. However, eventually, he gives in and questions his segment as to what he sees in you. Said segment obviously doesn't want to answer but this is Prime. No one defies Prime.

Dottore would probably just show up in your house one day and you'd get a few mini heart attacks in the span of a minute - how did this man get in, *sees blue hair* oh it's my lover!, *realization* no it's not, *panic* there is a man eerily similar to my partner in my damn house. He'd be amused by your reaction which doesn't really help his case, but it's very similar to your lover's own reaction, which is comforting in a funny way. So while seem to be quite different, perhaps they share more similarities than they want to admit? Perhaps. Maybe.

Another thing I think would be funny is Dottore being his usual Dottore self and attempting to scare you off in the beginning, but you don't really have a reaction because your segment lover put you through a lot of this already. It really leaves him to think about how and what does he do because he's never been in a situation like this.

It would be more of Dottore trying to make you fall for him rather than the other way around, he has no need for such a frivolous feeling. Rather he wants to feel the pure satisfaction of making you love him. Unfortunately, it doesn't go that simply of course. He knows he's fallen too deep when he's in his lab alone, wondering what you're doing right now in your home, perhaps you're cooking? Or reading? Such a shame, if you lived here with him, he wouldn't need to wonder. He'd know. Wait. Live together??

It wouldn't just be Prime Dottore trying to do this, anything that catches their creator's attention is sure to draw theirs too, so it's kind of just a full package. Eventually you kind of just have a lot of blue-haired men examining the corners of your house for some reason. You hide behind your original lover while he shoots glares at his other segments, annoyed at how things have turned out. But oh well.

I've pondered a lot about this ask, and honestly, the whole concept is so delicious I don't even know if I can do it justice. I mean really it's TASTY. I write too much I think and this was all over the place.

#smooches talks #dottore love notes <3 #goes feral and insane and crazy #THE POSSIBILIITES ARE ENDLESS... i just need him to feel loved

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tamamatango · 3 months

Text

Unplanned character analysis I should’ve saved for 6/23 but I need instant gratification whenever I have a thought or I explode

Sup nerds, thanks for reading my master’s thesis completely overanalyzing what literal scraps we have in relation to the new anime. Unfortunately no updates yet on that front but I’m starting to go a little Cuckoo For Cocoa Puffs in anticipation so fingers crossed they drop something soonish. I have a couple of longer form posts in my back pocket that may or may not happen in a nearish timeframe, we’ll see what I get around to.

I was going to not do any more posts until one of those materializes but I’m detouring from that for a bit because I had an epiphany about Saburo now that I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this series again. Those if you who know me and/or were around for when I was most active here know he is my favorite character behind Kururu and that’s still true. So here’s like. A reading of him that I think completely changes the way you will look at this character. If you don’t see him like this already.

Saburo(/Mutsumi since this goes equally for the manga side) is not actually cool. Like this kid is totally cringe and a weirdo right. Literally thinks of the most unnecessarily extra solutions to things, wardrobe that gets increasingly bizarre over time, writes poetry that is usually either obnoxiously cheesy or just doesn’t make any sense. Spends his free time doing stuff like talking to cats and collecting shitty kids’ meal toys. His drawings aren’t even that good most of the time. Unironically Momoka has more swag than Saburo does (granted Momoka has more swag than most characters but that’s besides the point). Yes he is a super genius and athletically gifted and conventionally attractive to other people his age, and (for manga Mutsumi only) it’s later implied he was modified by the N326 in some way. But here’s the thing—a lot of his peers either think he’s a smarmy ass show-off little shit (manga) or just completely inaccessible to the average person so why bother (anime).

The reason why he’s such a celebrity is because the only people who think he is really cool are children and preteen girls (and secretly Giroro but the whole reason that’s a funny joke is because Saburo is totally not appealing to adults at all let alone hardened super serious soldiers). But this is a very profitable and exploitable audience so he is really successful. He is the equivalent of a Disney Channel teen star. He’s like what Justin Bieber was in 2010 or whenever. In the manga Mutsumi gladly eats up this attention, but the anime pretty heavily implies especially toward the (until this year tee hee) end of the series that Saburo kinda dislikes being under the celebrity microscope and having producers who want to milk their child star as much as possible; he just wants to create and entertain and express himself freely which is why he does everything anonymously.

I think the anime tried a little too hard to make him unironically cool and my guess is that this is for a couple reasons. One, he has Akira Ishida’s voice coming out of him which yes was obviously chosen primarily because lol Kaworu but also his voice is just inherently associated with “we want you to think this character is a mysterious ikemen” most of the time. Two, compared to the manga there’s a lot more fillery stuff revolving around Natsumi idolizing him and because so much of the show is from Natsumi’s perspective, that’s the perspective the viewers (who were also intended to be children then, though I think now that it’s a 20 year old series they’re going more for the nostalgic adult audience) get as well. Don’t get me wrong though the VERY few serious moments he had were fantastic, 229 best episode movie 3 best movie etc etc.

You could also argue Kururu thinks Saburo is “cool” but I think he respects him more in the way that he’s kinda like him but younger so they understand each other intrinsically and that makes Saburo more reliable in fulfilling Kururu’s specific needs than most other characters. Saburo’s a lot kinder ostensibly but unlike the rest of the cast, who recoils at Kururu’s mannerisms and psychological torment of everyone, Saburo usually just thinks it’s funny. Kururu is much of a freak as he is but is very particular about his image and actively micromanages almost every aspect of his personality to get people to see him a certain way and avoid showing too many of his vulnerabilities (it’s all but confirmed in the anime that his entire cadence and vocal tics are an elaborate act and his normal voice is totally different). We don’t see it much on screen but it seems he can kinda relax a bit around Saburo who himself is totally out there but in a more genuine and unabashed way, like even in the anime where the radio persona is a secret it’s not like he acts that much differently on the air than he does in his personal life. Besides maybe the early manga Kururu is not really a romantic and probably thinks Saburo’s sappy wappy poetry is cringe too, but he likes Saburo enough that he supports him being himself no matter what bullshit that entails (besides getting himself killed of course). Sorry had to shoehorn best partners talk for a bit longtime Kirb readers know how it is.

So there is actually a specific thing that made me decide let’s do a fucking character analysis for the first time in like 5 years or something, and that’s that I was browsing through raws of the one 4koma book I don’t physically own (shoutout to @kagender for those scans along with some other cool stuff like Keroro Land issues, storyboards and ref sheets!), and it was these strips:

This is a 4koma series in which Meru and Maru from Movie 2 hang around with the main cast for funny shenanigans. Not super relevant because these two strips don’t have them pictured but anyways. They’re having a beach day and Natsumi runs into Saburo who is there to “surf” but actually there are no real waves and he is just pretending. Because he’s copying the 1978 film Big Wednesday (it is Sunday in the comic). In other words teenager larps because he saw it in an old movie once. I know this is not really a pertinent example because the Keroro Land 4komas are all very silly and non-canon (a lot of the artists are actually former doujin artists) but look. This is peak, okay. This is my ideal Saburo outside of serious scenarios. I’ve seen the vision.

I swore I was gonna make this a short post but it’s not I guess. Can’t resist turning these into goddamn essays. So to wrap it up: Saburo is some dorky kid who thinks he’s way more of a hotshot than he really is and totally owns it with no shame. This is adorable. I will defend him with my life. I need Anikero The New to agree with me here. In like 85% of cases I prefer the anime’s takes on everything but Yoshizaki cooked with the ideas behind this guy so listen to word of god. Give us more Silly Saburo. The TikTok teenagers of today deserve this representation.

#keroro gunso #sgt frog #saburo mutsumi #mutsumi hojo #(while we’re at it can reiwa just make his name Saburo Hojo so I can stop tagging him as the name that’s not actually his name #long-winded Kirb is back baby #just less frequently because I’m rusty and busier

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mynameisnotsoda · 7 months

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Explaining my entire dsmpsona playlist because I can

P.s. every mention of Soda in this post isn't me, i just dont feel like putting c! In front of it every single time LMAO

Also i dont think i ever posted the ref on tumblr!!?!??! Criminal but putting it here is better methinks

I also put this in my studentbur playlist, which feels fitting for both of them. However for Adam its more metaphorical whereas with Soda its more literal.

I have my own shapeshifter lore that's loitering in my brain that i need to write down eventually BUT the basics are essentially that shapeshifters are "born" from the planet. They CAN come from other shapeshifters but only once and most choose not to have a bio kid.

So basically, Soda literally popped out of the ground one day, was found by Sapnap and then adopted by Bad and Skeppy. Soda was maybe physically 9/10 years old and was so curious about the world and excited to experience life. If any creature could possibly be made of pure love, its them.

Growing up Soda got REALLY attached to Bad, they clung onto him a lot and it was to the point where it was probably unhealthy. Of course Bad noticed, which made him actually set some boundaries despite not really wanting to. Skeppy was able to convince him, though, as when it comes to the kids hes the voice of reason.

So, Bad would start off by telling Soda that he was going to be gone, leading up to him just disappearing for maybe a few hours at a time before eventually coming back. Eventually Soda was able to function without Bad, but that ended up backfiring as they just latched onto Sapnap instead.

With Soda's attachment to their brother, they tagged along with him when he went out fairly often but after being weened off of Bad it became more frequent. Soda and Sapnap were practically attached at the hip, regardless of Sapnap's protesting.

With a group of teenagers they were obviously doing some reckless, stupid shit and Soda was just along for the ride! At first Dream and George hated Soda—they were just Sapnap's annoying younger sibling—but eventually they got used to Soda being around. Especially since they may have persuaded Soda to use their shapeshifting for nefarious purposes.

At first everyone found Soda adorable, their cheery optimism, endless energy and amusing naivety was a part of their charm. But then it became...obnoxious.

Sapnap always had a short temper, he tried his best to handle it, but sometimes he'd just snap at Soda when they became too much of a handful. He was always quick to apologize but it affected Soda deeply.

Soda very much struggled with any sort of negative emotions, when they felt it—it hit them hard. One day, it was enough to send them spiraling, having a panic attack alone in their room. This was also the first time memories of their past lives resurfaced. At first it was rather intriguing, though a jumpscare, but then it just got worse.

It seemed like Soda's lives were always filled with turmoil and a constant feeling of dread. The stronger their emotions became the more fragments of memories would appear. Soda didn't tell anyone about this.

Skipping much further ahead, Soda obviously sided with the Dteam during the revolution. They were family, in Soda's eyes at least. Which made it incredibly easy for Dream to use that to his advantage. He used them in every way that he could to win the war, even going as far as to try and make Soda resent Tommy and Tubbo. Soda was a spy, mostly, turning into a cat to effortlessly infiltrate the enemy. They heard and saw everything, but part of them felt bad for it, so they never told Dream everything. He noticed.

The horrors of being a child soldier.

Dream's obsession with power and control was never obvious, not to his friends and certainly not to Soda. They truly believed he had good intentions despite going to war with Wilbur. Then again, Soda doesn't understand what war really is. But the pressure to keep up with Dream's demands and avaid his increasing irritably became exhausting and overwhelming. Yet Soda believed it was their fault.

Tubbo and Tommy weren't safe from the horrors either, they had that much in common with Soda. The three of them went through hell, basically.

Dream.

Aaaand tumblr wont let me add more songs so im cutting this into parts through reblogs. I'll probably continue this later (bc its almost 2am pFF) and might post the second part before i go to sleep like im doing now :P

I am cringe but I am free

#dsmp!soda #dsmpsona #dsmp #dream smp #dsmp oc #dsmp au

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darcyfangirlsfrequently · 3 months

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come one, come all, it's happening again

Part 2/2 of "i'm coming right back to where i belong"

Summary: As Penelope tries to come to terms with Luke's feelings for her, she's thrown another curveball, but it ends up being exactly what she needed.

Word count: 1413

Can also be read here on Ao3

Karma was a bee-yotch, and she had it out for one Penelope Grace Garcia. She hadn’t been working that closely with Luke up until that point, so she figured it wouldn’t be that hard to have some space from him (and those damned expressive, concerned, beautiful brown eyes) while she figured out her next steps.

But, as Lady Un-luck would have it, Rossi called to let her know that Emily was currently down for the count, and JJ was checking on her, while he and Tara were needed elsewhere. Meaning she and Luke would have to work together on their newest lead, some woman named Teresa. Oh, and the sewage-flavored icing on the moldy, rancid cake? She was Tyler’s ex-girlfriend.

She would have laughed at the craziness of the situation if she didn’t feel so damn awful. She’s sure she and Luke would have caught eyes and smiled about if the irony weren’t so… unfortunate. And if he wasn’t so busy looking like he wanted to murder Tyler at any given moment.

Luke was, of course, being a complete professional with Penelope, meanwhile, she had a storm raging internally. His behavior never changed, because why would it? If he had truly felt these things for her the whole time, as he apparently had, why should he change? Penelope cursed herself for not figuring it out sooner. It really was obvious.

Once Penelope had tracked down Teresa, they had to call her in for her own protection. And then was when things went from awkward to who-the-hell-is-writing-this-soap-opera. Teresa was younger, taller and had some tattoos, but by god she looked like Penelope. Her hair was the same. Her fashion style was the same. Penelope was even certain she had had that same pair of glasses once upon a time.

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Luke muttered under his breath when he saw her.

Penelope was at first a little jealous of Teresa, in some disturbed way. Then she saw how Teresa and Tyler were together, and her heart melted.

“Oh my god,” she whispered to Luke. “They’re still in love with each other.”

Luke huffed out a laugh. “This could not get any weirder.”

He never should have underestimated her.

***

After the case, Penelope and Tyler were alone in the Round Table Room, gathering their things.

“Thank you,” he said in a quiet voice. “For helping me.”

Penelope smiled at him. “You still love her.”

He hung his head. “I’m sorry.”

She shook her head. “Don’t be. It never would have worked between us, because when you look at me, you see someone else, and when I look at you…”

“You do the same?”

She laughed lightly. “Yeah.”

“Good.” Tyler glanced out the round table window to the bullpen where Luke could be seen discreetly trying (and failing) to not glare at them (Tyler) through the windows. “I didn’t want to have to be the one to tell you.”

“It’s really that obvious?”

He shrugged. “Eh. Less so for you. But he hates me ten times more than anyone else on your team does, so…”

“I have no idea how I missed it for so long.”

“You should go for him. You two would be a lot better together than we ever could have been.”

“And you should go for her,” Penelope told him. “Something tells me if you explained yourself… she’d give you a second chance.”

Tyler’s face lit up. “You think so?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Go.”

He knew Teresa was on her way out, so he bolted from the room, hoping to catch her before she left. Penelope followed behind, smiling, and stopped beside Luke’s desk.

“What’s up with him?” Luke asked.

Penelope nodded with her chin toward Tyler and Teresa, who could be seen through the glass doors, right in front of the elevators.

He was holding her hands and clearly speaking very passionately. She looked shocked for a moment, but then smiled, stood up on her toes, and kissed his cheek.

Penelope was positively beaming as she watched them head out together, hopeful they’d find a way to make it work.

Luke looked over at her. “Did… did you do that?”

She nodded, still grinning widely.

“Wow,” he said, voice soft, and kind of impressed. “That’s really big of you, I’m proud of you. I know how much you cared—”

She cut him off. “Stop. Don’t be proud. It was a no-brainer. Plus, you and I need to talk.” She extended a hand to him. “Come with me?”

Confused, he took her hand and followed her to her lair. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, everything is fine. Great, even. Or, it has the potential to be. But I have a lot to say to you and I didn’t want it to be overheard.”

“Okay… that makes me a little uneasy.”

“No!” Penelope exclaimed. “That was not my goal. I have a lot to apologize for. And amends to make. And thought processes to explain. So could you just let me talk for five minutes to make sure I get everything out?”

He nodded.

“Amazing wonderful thank you. So. Until, like, two days ago, I had no idea you ever had feelings for me. And I realize now how obvious you were the whole time, but there are reasons why I didn’t see it. You remember I was shot, right? Well, the person who shot me had asked me out, and so it kind of messed me up in the head a bit, giving me the idea that if it seems to good to be true, it probably is. Especially since he was the last conventionally attractive person to ask me out until, well, you. And yes, I can see you doing the mental math, there were, like, 13 years between those two events. So, you know. I thought you were too good to be true. Not that you’d ever hurt me! But I thought there was no way I could be so lucky that you’d… actually want something real with me.

“And on top of that, you have no way of knowing this because it was before you, but Derek Morgan. He and I were very flirty. For eleven years. But nothing ever came of that because it was a joke the whole time, and we both knew that! And then he left and you came along and when you started doing the same things he did… I was just so used to it being a joke it never occurred to me you might actually mean what you were saying. And I realize now just how obvious it was from your point of view how obvious it was, but you have to understand from my point of view it wasn't. So when you asked me out I was thrilled but I was also shocked. It didn't make any sense to me. And then things were awkward, so I figured I was right! It was too good to be true! I thought you were trying to find a way to let me down gently so I beat you to it but because my heart was breaking because I had been so excited I said some awful, untrue things I didn't even mean, and I just… I'm so sorry, Luke. That's what I'm trying to say. I am so sorry. For everything. I'm sorry I pretended to hate you all those years, I'm sorry I did and said all those awful things, and I'm sorry that when you admitted the other day that you'd had feelings for me this whole time—even if you didn't say it in as many words—I didn't say it back.”

Luke finally broke his silence, his voice thick with emotion. “You have feelings for me?”

She nodded, crying a bit. “And I know I've been so horrid lately, but if there's any part of you that's willing to give me a second chance…”

“You mean it? You'd want to be with me?”

“If you'll have me.”

He took a step towards her and crushed her in a hug. “Just promise me you won't run from me again. I love you, Penelope, if we're doing this, we're doing this for real.”

She kissed him. She kissed him and kissed him and kissed him until she couldn’t breathe. Then she caught her breath and kissed him some more. “I love you too,” she whispered against his lips. “I won't run. I promise. I'm in this. Forever.”

#garvez #garvez fanfiction #luke alvez #penelope garcia #criminal minds #criminal minds reboot #criminal minds evolution #criminal minds fanfiction

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