#anime looks incredible cant wait to watch it too

[cayennecrush]

dungeon girlfriends!

[cnnmairoll]

I’m glad to hear that!

In that case, can I ask for Tingyun, Gepard, and Welt with a very energetic reader? For example, a reader who loves to run around and is basically bouncing off the walls?

Thank you again! (/^▽^)/

-🌸

Sparks of Enthusiasm

Character(s) : Gepard, Tingyun, Welt Genre : Fluff a/n : Sure thing🌸anon! So sorry I couldn't finish this sooner 😭But I hope you enjoy this ! And I hope I bring Tingyun to justice! (Welt too bc i cant rlly write him)

You had always been a whirlwind of enthusiasm, and this day was no different. As soon as you spotted Tingyun beneath the blooming cherry blossoms, you couldn't contain your excitement. "Tingyun!" you exclaimed, your voice echoing through the tranquil grove.

Tingyun looked up from her book, her eyes narrowing slightly in surprise before a playful smile curved her lips. "Ah, my spirited friend, what brings you here today?"

You wasted no time in answering. Instead, you darted forward, your energy propelling you towards her like a force of nature. You practically skidded to a halt in front of her, barely managing to stay on your feet. "I wanted to see you!" you declared, your words rushed and breathless.

Tingyun chuckled, her laughter as melodious as a songbird's tune. "Well, you've certainly succeeded in that," she replied, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Would you care to sit with me for a moment?"

But sitting was the last thing on your mind. You began to pace back and forth in front of her, your hands gesticulating wildly as you spoke. "I've had the most amazing day! I ran through the forest, climbed a tree, and chased after butterflies. It was incredible!"

Tingyun watched your animated movements with a mix of fascination and amusement. "It sounds like you had quite the adventure," she remarked, her voice laced with admiration for your boundless spirit.

You couldn't stay still for long. With a sudden burst of energy, you took off running in a wide circle around Tingyun, your laughter filling the air. "And guess what?" you exclaimed, skidding to a halt once more. "I found a hidden waterfall! It's the most beautiful place I've ever seen!"

Tingyun's eyes sparkled with curiosity. "A hidden waterfall, you say? Tell me more."

And so, you launched into a vivid description of your discovery, your words flowing like a river in full bloom. Tingyun listened with rapt attention, her fascination evident in the way she hung on to your every word. Your energy was contagious, and as you spoke, she couldn't help but become swept up in the excitement of your tale.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, you finally settled down next to Tingyun, your energy waning just a bit. "Sorry for being so hyper," you said, suddenly self-conscious.

Tingyun placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, her smile warm and reassuring. "No need to apologize, my dear. Your boundless enthusiasm is a gift. It's like a breath of fresh air in this quiet grove."

You sighed contentedly, feeling the weight of your exuberance dissipate. "Thank you, Tingyun. You always make me feel so comfortable."

Tingyun's gaze softened as she looked at you. "It's because you remind me of the vitality of youth, the spirit that often gets lost in the routine of life. Embrace your energy, for it's a precious treasure."

You smiled back at her, your heart warmed by her words. "I'll remember that, Tingyun."

As the two of you continued to chat beneath the blossoming cherry trees, Tingyun couldn't help but feel a newfound appreciation for your infectious spirit. Your unique energy had breathed life into her world, and she couldn't wait to hear more of your captivating tales, for it was in your lively presence that she found a renewed sense of wonder and adventure.

You bounded into the courtyard, your steps light and energetic. It was as if you were powered by an endless reservoir of enthusiasm, and nothing could dampen your spirits. You greeted everyone with an infectious grin, your laughter echoing through the courtyard.

Gepard watched you from a distance, perplexed and slightly bewildered. His normally stern countenance betrayed hints of curiosity and perhaps a touch of bemusement.

"Gepard!" You darted over to him, your voice brimming with cheerfulness.

He turned his gaze towards you, his brow furrowed. "Yes?"

"I bet I can outrun you!" You declared with unwavering confidence, ready to challenge the formidable captain.

Gepard blinked, momentarily taken aback. "Outrun me? In a footrace?"

"Yep!" You nodded vigorously, your eyes sparkling with determination.

With a faint shrug, Gepard accepted your challenge. After all, he couldn't resist a direct challenge to his abilities. He couldn't help but smile just a little as he lined up next to you, his towering figure contrasting sharply with your smaller, exuberant form.

"Ready... Set... Go!" You shouted and bolted forward like an arrow released from a bow.

Gepard took off at a more measured pace, his long strides quickly eating up the distance between you. He couldn't help but admire your boundless energy, but he knew that he had the advantage in terms of speed and endurance.

As the race progressed, you continued to bounce around him, your excitement undiminished even as he steadily closed the gap. Gepard couldn't help but chuckle as he finally surged ahead, crossing the finish line with a triumphant grin.

"I win," he declared, his chest heaving slightly from the exertion.

You pouted playfully, catching your breath. "You're really fast, Gepard!"

He chuckled again, a rare sound that seemed to lighten the air around him. "Well, I do try to stay in shape."

Your boundless energy seemed to have no effect on his meticulous nature, but it had certainly brought a smile to his face. As you continued to chatter and bounce around the courtyard, Gepard found himself enjoying the novelty of your presence. In your exuberance, you had managed to bring a touch of warmth and spontaneity to his otherwise regimented world, and he couldn't help but appreciate that about you.

In the end, your boundless energy had managed to crack through the stoic exterior of the Silvermane Guards' captain, revealing a glimpse of the endearingly adorable dork hidden within him. And as you continued to share your enthusiasm with him, Gepard couldn't deny that he found it oddly charming.

"Have you ever tried climbing trees?" you asked suddenly, your eyes shining with excitement.

He raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "Climbing trees?"

"Yeah! It's so much fun," you exclaimed, grabbing his hand and leading him toward a nearby tree.

Gepard hesitated for a moment, but your enthusiasm was infectious, and he found himself following your lead. With surprising agility, you scampered up the tree, finding footholds with ease. Gepard, on the other hand, struggled a bit, his armor making it a clumsy endeavor.

"You're doing great, Captain!" you called down, encouragingly.

After a few more attempts, Gepard finally managed to reach a sturdy branch beside you. He couldn't help but chuckle at his own awkwardness. "I never thought I'd find myself in a tree."

"That's the spirit!" you cheered, swinging from a branch with reckless abandon.

As the day wore on, you introduced Gepard to a myriad of activities he had never imagined himself participating in. From cartwheels in the courtyard to a friendly game of tag with the guards, he found himself stepping out of his comfort zone and embracing the joy of the moment.

Welt had been looking out the window, sketchbook in hand, capturing the ever-changing landscape below. He glanced up when he felt a sudden burst of enthusiasm nearby.

You bounded over to him, a whirlwind of excitement. "Welt! Welt! Guess what? I saw the most amazing cloud formation just now! It looked like a dragon chasing a unicorn, and I thought you might want to sketch it!"

Welt couldn't help but chuckle at your exuberance. "You never cease to amaze me with your boundless energy. A dragon chasing a unicorn, you say? That sounds like quite the sight."

Without waiting for another word, you grabbed Welt's hand, dragging him towards the edge of the deck. "Come on, Welt! Let's see if we can spot it again!"

Welt, ever the calm and collected one, found himself swept up in your enthusiasm. He allowed you to lead him to the perfect vantage point, all the while secretly enjoying the thrill of your contagious energy.

The two of you scanned the skies, and when you finally spotted the elusive cloud formation, you cheered triumphantly, clapping your hands. "See, Welt? It's right there! Isn't it amazing?"

Welt smiled warmly at your sheer delight. "Indeed, it is. Thank you for sharing this moment with me."

But your excitement didn't stop there. With renewed vigor, you tugged Welt along as you darted around the parlor car, pointing out various landmarks and wildlife you spotted from above.

"Welt, look at those majestic mountains! And there's a flock of colorful birds!" You exclaimed, not pausing for breath.

Welt couldn't help but admire your zest for life. He followed your lead, sketchbook forgotten for the moment, as you both reveled in the beauty of the world unfolding beneath the airship.

As the day turned into night and the stars filled the sky, you finally slowed down, your energy waning just a bit. You plopped down next to Welt, who had resumed his spot by the railing.

"Sorry, Welt, I guess I got carried away," you said, a sheepish grin on your face.

Welt shook his head, his brown eyes filled with warmth. "No need to apologize. Your energy is infectious, and I wouldn't have traded this day for anything else."

You leaned against him, both of you gazing out into the night sky. In that serene moment, you and Welt shared a deep sense of contentment, brought together by your boundless enthusiasm and his quiet appreciation for life's wonders.

And as you watched the stars twinkle overhead, you couldn't help but feel grateful for having Welt as your companion on this grand adventure.

[bobatelevision]

i had to put my sweet baby down yesterday...

on thursday morning he was fine, eating and drinking fine. nothing out of the ordinary. thursday night he seems to have trouble breathing, he had discharge around his eyes, and kept making these pained noises I've never heard him make before. he had no appetite and wasnt drinking water. i bought some critical care to try force feeding him but he wasnt accepting it at all and tried to give him a mix of pedialyte + water to get him fluids and he accepted some but not a lot. i thought he maybe had some upper respiratory infection and maybe needed antibiotics, so i started calling some veterinarians in my area.

it was really late at night too so i called around and had such a hard time finding a vet to treat him bc most of the animal hospitals either:

-serviced guinea pigs

-their exotic vet wasnt in that night

-serviced guinea pigs but was closed

i was scared to even go to sleep that night bc his conditioned looked so bad, i didnt think he would even make it to the morning. but he managed to survive the night, so i called around again and was able to find a vet about 40 min away that could take him. we enter the hospital and they immediately take him in and i was in the waiting room. the doc comes out to talk to me to explain what was happening.

he had a stone in his bladder that was blocking his urethra and he couldn't urinate. bladder stones can be very life threatening bc if an animal cant pee, it can develop an infection (sepsis) and even get a heart attack. when she examined him, everytime she palpated his bladder he would be in pain, so they gave him a pain injection. they lead me into a room to explain what his treatment would consist of, and i was fucking shocked.

nearly $5k for his surgery and treatment, i couldn't fucking believe it. the worst part is there really was no plan b on his treatment that wasn't euthanasia. i felt so fucking sick, but i had to think on it more. i thought about maybe calling other animal hospitals but i already had a lot of trouble trying to find anyone to treat him at all, and even if there was a miracle situation where i could afford his treatment, it would not guarantee that he wouldnt fall ill again. on top of the fact that guinea pigs are really fragile creatures and dont have very long life spans. the procedure is incredibly invasive and could put so much stress on his little body. i didnt want him to be in more pain than he really was.

so i made the tough decision on putting him down, because i didn't want him to suffer any longer. i'm so heartbroken bc although i knew we would part ways one day, i didnt imagine it would be so soon. we spent past 3 years together, i adopted him mid pandemic bc being stuck in a different country from the rest of my family is incredibly isolating. i gave him so much love and spoiled him so much. he ate veggies & hay to his hearts content, would start cui-cuing at the sound of a bag being opened, he got to sleep in the largest and comfiest pet beds. he used to sleep on my nap while i gamed or watched shows. he was very skittish with people, except for me bc he knew i would give him the world. i'm feeling so defeated rn. i stayed with him til the very last moment, he was very sedated but soo cuddly in the last hour. the only thing to bring me peace of mind is knowing he was relaxed and in no pain in his final moments.

he doesn't know the amount of people that love him around the world, even as far as Australia. he had an impact on many people. all my irls and my online friends absolutely adored him. even my mom, who is deathly afraid of rodents, thought he was so cute and precious bc of how fluffy he is. his departure left a huge hole in my heart. when i got back home, i bursted into tears looking at his empty enclosure. im so used to him jumping around and getting quirked up when he hears me enter my room. i just cant believe i'll never get to see him, or hold him, or even feed him again.

Rest in Peace, my beloved Taro.

I love you so dearly, you may very little but you had a very huge heart.. and appetite. You will always be missed and I hope you are enjoying large quantities of lettuce in cui cui heaven.

[floofz]

i just finished watching ep five... can i know your thoughts on it

OUGH... so many thoughts my dude... where do i even start...

well first of all this episode completely wrecked me emotionally. domestic violence is always hard to watch, but damn did they do their best to make it as horrible as possible (in a good way! its amazing how studio lan sheds light on these kinds of things happening). the animation - the expressions, the hitting, the bruises - the audio design - god the sounds of the violence alone were so fucking heartwrenching. and then the involvement of the kids too. it was so so painful to watch but it was so incredibly well done.

we finally get to know more about the two siblings (and also confirmation that the two are actually involved! plus that lu guang turns out not to be the good brother in the childrens drawing). the scene with cheng xiaoshi being amused about the brother's behaviour and childish thinking seems funny at first, but when you later see the family situation theyre in, it all just makes so much painful sense. he has all this rage and strong sense of justice in him bc they are growing up in this unstable household full of violence. its heartbreaking.

the boy the brother met at the fountain, i first thought it was a young cheng xiaoshi bc of the haircut, but his voice was very different so now im perplexed. they could just be trying to throw us off here but i cant imagine them picking such a drastically different voice from cheng xiaoshi for him, especially bc we already heard his voice as a kid in s1. now my guess is maybe a young qian jin? it would check out with what we know about younger him. and i mean were 5 episodes in we kinda need to get to all the connections eventually.

now, lu guang and cheng xiaoshi. i've already seen people on reddit talk about how lu guang seems off again this episode. what particularly makes me think though is that one scene where their connection supposedly went "bad". i mean, everything, especially in animation, is very intentional so there must be much more to it. im wondering if someone interfered with their connection. one theory i also saw and thought about it a bit more on my own: what if red eyes - either one of the siblings - somehow possessed lu guang during their dive for a short time, making him unable to talk to cheng xiaoshi on his own, hence the silence. and after that he also doesnt realize he was silent for a while. and bc one of the siblings took hold over him for a sec, they saw what lu guang saw and that would explain why the sister supposedly knows cheng xiaoshi (and wants to talk to him at the police station) and that he was involved with her past through the dive. though i guess she could also know about him from qian jin. idk, I JUST HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS.

all in all a fucking fantastic episode but i did have to take a break after watching it. its very emotionally draining. but you can definitely tell the care and thought they put into this.

OH WAIT I ALMOST FORGOT. the little soft expressions and smiles from lu guang when cheng xiaoshi acted cute as xixi in the episode made me explode<3 gdi once again cheng xiaoshi never sees his soft expressions, LU GUANG LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT WHEN HE CAN SEE.

anyway yeah lots of thoughts 😭 PLS also let me know what you think!!!

[gla55t33th]

Questions for Lazureus ^^ (If it's okay to ask multiple in one, I hope)

5. How easy is it to earn their mistrust? 6. Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable? 15. How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first? 29. Do they usually live up to their own ideals? 34. How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt? 38. What memory do they revisit the most often?

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

Feel free to answer as many or as few of these as you like, I feel I may have picked challenging ones but that's what I'm curious about! (as a little extra question, would you consider putting Laz on Artfight for next year? I understand if not, just wanna know, and have a great day <3)

5. Depends whether or not youve earnt Laz's trust in the first place- which is no easy feat! He acts the same towards nigh on everybody regardless of trust but once youve earned it (Which is only his family, one living friend, and a few who have since died) I dont think itd be easy to break? He is an incredibly loyal person after a certain point!

6. Flexible. He is the one put at the helm of the system enforcing them, after all! But he does have his own personal moral laws which are fairly immovable.

15. On the spot! He wouldnt rehearse it at all, the guy gives no thought to what people think or how they might respond to him.

29. No. But ey have since lowered their ideals.

34. You get so used to it that you forget that feeling is guilt! It just becomes a dull undertone you cant put a name or cause to :]

F. I NEED HIM DEAD FOR REAL!!!!!!! I ADORE HIM BUT I WANT TO PUT HIM IN A MEAT GRINDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE IS A NARRATIVE PUNCHING BAG AND IS SO SO FUN TO ROTATE IN MY HEAD!!!!!!!!! i look at a square window and go omg. laz :3 AND THEN I FLINCH!!!!! HE TAKES UP TOO MUCH SPACE IN MY BRAIN

xtra: I would like to say yes but 1. I need to finish an updated ref sheet holy moly. and 2. Im not sure if i will participate!! It was nice for a bit but artfight does not mesh well with my anxiety X[ (its the same reason i dont do DTIYS' anymore)

38.

One, Two, Three, Four archangels lined up in an empty white expanse. We looked worse for wear, an unbefitting visage of deities. Posed like dolls, deadly still, with heads bowed towards a huge figure that blurred into its surroundings. I knew what was about to happen, but not why. Though... who was I to question the reasoning this higher power had? In fact, questioning the creator was likely reason enough in hindsight. We were designed to solely carry out our God's word-- I was to be its right hand, its trusted spear. A proxy for the lower echelon. I knelt at its command, waiting, and my bretheren watched knowing they'd follow soon. The silence broke my nerves. The memory itself degrades thereon under the panic-- and like the way that an animal doesn't think when snared in a trap, nothing was processed bar the pain, the pain and the knowledge that a portion of your very being was being rent from gilded flesh. I would never go back up there, even if they wanted me back, but being tossed aside in such an unexplained and violent manner by such a supposedly perfect being plays with you. Doubly so when you've been cast away from the very reason you were created in the first place. And it couldn't even do the courtesy of rendering me mortal, so I could just live out my days like the rest down here.

[tyonfs]

GIRL DONT GET ME STARTED ON WEBTOONS I WILL NEVER SHUT UP!!!!

but omg yeah i see what u mean w operation true love HAHA the sister is so annoying so it gives me SO MUCH satisfaction to see her not getting her way rn!! omg if u do decide to start it again lmk!!! 🤭 AND JIMIN AND YE EUN ARE GETTING THEIR OWN WEBTOON??? OMG E2L ARC I LOVE THEM SM CRIESNFKGNRN

i'm literally keeping up w so many webtoons rn (i gave up on anime bc of webtoons im sorry alice 😭😔) but my two absolute favs r seasons of blossom and honey lemon!!! (both of them update on the same day too so that's lucky for me LOL) but i recently found this new webtoon called muse on fame and i am Very Invested already!!! i also keep up w hello baby, go away romeo, operation: true love, maybe meant to be, the guy upstairs, get schooled!, perfect marriage revenge, there must be happy endings, dark moon: the blood altar, and marry my husband!! plus a lot of daily pass ones like designated bully, reality quest etc. OH and i don't even like horror but i found this rlly good dystopian one called everything is fine! it's currently on hiatus but i m super excited for the next season! i might also start purple hyacinth bc it's on hiatus rn and i can catch up quickly! beyond virtual is also rlly cool but it's also on hiatus rn unfortunately :(

which are ur fav webtoons??

also omg i saw u saw the dreamies live!!! THATS SO AWESOME I SHALL HAVE TO LIVE VICARIOUSLY THRU U :') which of their songs did u enjoy seeing live the most? and how were they irl? like . do they look the same as in videos? (idk if this makes sense but like are they taller than they seem or like. basically how are their personalities irl? 😭)

I'm so sorry for the long ask lmao i tend to get too excited whenever someone asks me ab webtoons 💀🥲 i hope ur day has been great and you got to eat lots of good food and stayed hydrated!! – anime :)

HAHAH i’ve been on the webtoon grind for the past 6 years it’s hard to escape 🫨

the art style is still rlly nice so i would consider reading true love operation tbh LMAOAO but love triangles also stress me out 😔 (odd girl out you have ruined me) also i’m not sure if i translated the raws wrong but i think they’re just getting extra chapters :’)) lowkey…….. i like them more than the main couple 🫣

LMAOAODJJ ANIME ANON U EVOLVED INTO WEBTOON ANON 😩 omg seasons of blossom is my absolute fav i remember when the first three chapters were out and i thought it was the cutest webtoon ever and now it’s the most emotionally damaging work of art i’ve ever read 😭💗 i fast passed to the end and wow. incredibly beautiful. and honey lemon is so cute too!!! i hate the boyfriend 😡😡😡 cant wait for her to break up with him!!! omg muse on fame is sooo good i love the art style so much 🤭 hello baby is from the author of age matters right ?? i subscribed but i’m yet to check it out :0 i will have to once i catch up with unordinary LOL

omg i read those too except the daily pass ones 😩 dear x and suhee0 are the only ones i’ve been trying to keep up with </3 everything is fine is one of my favoritesss i’m so sad it’s been on hiatus tho 😔 omg the hybe webtoons im ngl i think the only one that caught my attention was the lesserafim one :’)

hmm i’d say my favorites at the moment are seasons of blossom, villain with a crush, cursed princess club, phone addict, our secret alliance, odd girl out, exchange student, the fox club, act like you love me, my dud to stud boyfriend, and after school lessons for unripe apples 💗💗 my all time favorites would have to be romance 101, swimming lessons for a mermaid, and seasons of blossom 🌷🌷

oh my god i have post concert memory loss from tds2 i swear but they were so unreal 😭💖 like i couldn’t believe they were right in front of my eyes they were incredibleee i think my fav stage to watch was trigger the fever 🥹🥹 ngl i think they’re shorter irl . but my guy friends are also 6’3 and i’m pretty short so i have a skewed perception anyways LMAOAO but they’re so passionate when they perform and RENJUN was so energetic i was so soft watching him 🥰 but they are all so much more gorgeous irl like YES they are beautiful on camera but it’s such a different experience in the flesh

don’t apologize !!! also i hope you’re staying healthy as well and make sure you have a good day 🥰💖

[iratusmus]

ive been sitting on this for like . months. i know this is like target audience: ME . but i dont care im subjecting the rest of you to it too.

should be noted that this is for an incredibly stupid au that im not going to bother explaining here . a total of like three people probably know what im talking but basically iykyk. will be happy to elaborate though if you ask. anyways fiona/scourge/finitevus/lien-da riichi mahjong nights headcanons

the whole stupid thing starts because fiona watches this dumb anime [knock-off of the legend of koizumi]. the premise is, amongst an... indescribable amount of stupidity, world politics basically runs on mahjong (riichi mahjong, specifically). lots of idiocy devolves from this. i think scourge would probably not enjoy it as much because 1) this requires some knowledge of current. ACTUALLY WAIT FUNNIEST POSSIBLE DIRECTION. legend of koizumi but with famous echidnaopolis/albion figures. okay so 1) this requires some knowledge of echidna history but scourge slept through all of the history lessons so he hasnt the faintest clue who any of these people are 2) following along with the game (while not necessary, you can still get enjoyment out of it without knowing anything abt mahjong through the stupidity of the people playing, but again the problem remains that he doesnt know who ANY of these people are) is borderline impossible and he's mostly just confused the whole time and 3) not enough violence. like yeah people die but thats after they sit and place tiles in orders he doesnt understand for reasons he also doesnt understand dramatically. fiona, though, who put in marginally more effort into her history lessons and is open to picking up new skills decides that she wants to learn how to play riichi mahjong.

so she introduces it to finitevus, who is. okay because on one hand he doesnt respect like almost anybody in this stupid show because they're all arrogant self-important morons, but on the other hand its also kind of offensive. like really offensive. like appallingly offensive. i... honestly i dont know how he would react. also its just really stupid like its so stupid. it has absolutely nothing meaningful or significant to say. its not like. the worst he's ever been forced to sit through (real housewives of mobotropolis was . a lot) but its still pretty bad. either way somehow fiona convinces him to pick mahjong up (after she forces him to sit through a few episodes) because its like um a strategy game and itll like totally . make them smarter, or something. its education right

somehow lien-da gets roped into this (blackmail, maybe?) and they play on the weekends

playing styles:

scourge: incredibly aggressive. "the best defense is a good offense. or even a mediocre offense. or any offense at all." is more or less his motto. cant be bothered to attempt with strategy, doesnt even look at anybody else's discards outside of seeing if he can pick them up to add to his own hand. should be noted that the only reason he doesnt cheat is because it requires too much paying attention to whats going on in the game. usually skirts by through winning before anybody else can. looks for the easiest & most convenient hand and will always try to win as opposed to cutting his losses (after an attempt to score big falls through). often deals into other people's hands. has a stupid amount of luck and has definitely gotten more yakuman than the rest of the group combined. usually ends up with an open hand, doesnt care at all. VERY easy to read, negative poker face.

fiona: tends to lean more on defensive but will sometimes go for a more aggressive style depending on how she's feeling. relatively new to mahjong strategy so mostly just trying to juggle betaori/suji/kabe and doing a mediocre job of it most of the time. on occasion if she gets frustrated or overconfident, she'll just drop the whole thing and only put a minimal focus on defense. doesn't deal into other people's hands too often but when she does its usually into finitevus'. she's picking up tricks from him though and is getting progressively harder to read. prefers a closed hand but if its convenient she's fine with an open one. has a good poker face.

finitevus: very defensive and exclusively aims for really good hands. perfectly fine with cutting his losses in the short run to focus on not dealing in. oftentimes will swoop in in the last few rounds with a crushing defeat for everybody else. really good at reading other people & their hands. can and will use suji to trip other people up. could not be more disgusted that 90% of scourge's wins come via pure luck as opposed to anything else. prefers to keep his hand closed if at all possible. perfect poker face, very hard to read. [+ designated score calculator. calculates it all in his head]

lien-da: generally tries to go for a more defensive/strategic style at first but usually gets overconfident and throws caution to the wind, getting progressively more aggressive (esp when she has a good hand). by the end she still keeps an eye on everybody else's discards for furiten, but not much more than that - other defensive strategies are too time consuming and require too much effort on her part. tries really hard to have a closed hand at the beginning of the game but usually gives up by the end. relatively easy to read, sporting a very mediocre to bad poker face.

win rankings go as follows: finitevus, fiona, scourge (PURELY through luck. keeps randomly getting yakuman to the chagrin of literally everybody else. they are all so mad about this because he doesnt deserve it not even a little bit), lien-da

[abigail-nicole]

tgcf liveread 2

archiving the twitter thread I made when I first read Heaven Official's Blessing, Tian Guan Ci Fu, one of the most delightful reading experiences of my life, in March of 2020 (this post from 3/26/20):

Chapter 30 starting with some STRAIGHT HUALIAN ROMANCE

"the two were just staring at each other, grinning"

just BROS HANGING OUT IN BED TOGETHER

Yall Ghost City is so cool & creepy & gruesome???? I can’t wait to see what the donghua does with this???? The animation will be INCREDIBLE

I’m sitting on my roof reading & when Shi Qingxuan said “Ghost City is Hua Cheng’s territory” I cackled so loudly someone down on the street looked up at me

“There’s a path for you in Heaven, but you refuse to take it, and instead, chose to barge into Hell. What shall we do with you?”

Hua Cheng slouching behind the curtain is like ALL THE LIFE GOALS OF SEXY

Hua Cheng watching Xie Lian roll into his casino like “honey did you think I wouldn’t notice you”

Hua Cheng, to all the bouncers: if you see the Crown Prince of Xian Le THAT IS MY BOYFRIEND AND BE NICE TO HIM. also BRING HIM TO ME BY WHATEVER FLIMSY EXCUSE NECESSARY

IM SO INTO THIS I CANT STOP YELLING TO THE CAT SITTING NEXT TO ME ON MY ROOFTOP CAN YOU BELIEVE HE HAS THE EYEPATCH NOW??? CAN YOU CAT WEVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS!!!!!!

cat & I enjoying the sunset While I Yell ABOUT THE CASINO LORD HUA CHENG

gentlemen I know you’re in love but EVERYONE IS STARING AT YOU

the sheer SEXUAL TENSION OF THIS SCENE

Oh good people in-scene are literally fainting because the sexual tension is too strong

Xie Lian: oh no all I can bet is my lunch leftovers which is this half eaten bun Hua Cheng: thank god my boyfriend hasn’t changed & always carries trash around in his pockets

this Dramatic Bitch I Love Him

Did I say Xie Lian was a himbo? I was wrong. Lang Qianqiu is the REAL himbo around here

The Two Himbos Win Out: we can’t lie to a friend that breaks bro code

oh my gOD IM LOSING IT

Okay let’s stop & talk about this personally & narratively

As an obligate extrovert who needs to be around 2-6 (but no more) people at all times to be happy: SAME, HUA CHENG, SAME

Narratively: if Hua Cheng our a flashing neon sign around his neck that said SINGLE it could not be more obvious than this comment (which was immediately preceded with “I never go to brothels”)

Hua Cheng, in this scene: I DON’T SLEEP AROUND, I’M SINGLE AS FUCK, CAN I MOVE INTO YOUR TINY APARTMENT SHRINE

and thank god the reaction from Xie Lian is “omg please move in with me immediately, we’ll share a pillowless bamboo mat and eat trash” and Hua Cheng is so happy

why is Hua Cheng so sexy ughhhhhh

this is a hell of an image

Noooooo don’t keep secrets from each other nooooooooooooooo

Jun Wu: don’t touch the scimitar no matter what

Xie Lian:

Jun Wu: don’t touch the scimitar no matter what

Xie Lian:

Xie Lian: is the scimitar his penis

Dad:

Xie Lian:

Nooooo why are they keeping secrets from each other is so stressful

Nooooooooo THIS IS GAY PANIC FROM XIE LIAN

AHHHHHHH THIS BOOK IS HITTING EVERY SINGLE HIGH NOTE

I had to read Hua Cheng’s lines here out loud in the sexiest voice I could think of bc threatening someone for your significant other is Sexy

Omg I Love E-Ming as much as Ruoye im sorry i was ever scared of this cute little pup if a sword

oh!!!! Soft!!!!! he is a Soft!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh i should’ve quit after.... so many parts ago I have to work tomorrow BUT i couldn’t leave if Hualian were Upset At Each Other now that theyre holding hands i can finally sleep

Okay I’ll resume tmrw with ch 49 in #tgcf, #heavensofficialblessing, this delightful delightful charming delicious piece of fiction please tune in anytime you like for a read along at https://sakhyulations.com/novel/heaven-officials-blessing/

(Full resources for mxtx translations at https://google.com/amp/s/thelostintern.tumblr.com/post/181315156804/mxtx-translations-masterpost/amp…)

archive note 2022: please buy official licensed publications of Heaven Official's Blessing, published by Seven Seas publishing, available where all major novels are sold!!!!!

[ghost-babygirl]

 blah blah i do not existttttttttt blah blah disregard look away look away nothin g is real i am not real 

 i’m kind of amazed at my ability to not follow the worse thread (physically) as I have often quickly done before. Is it because i’m too tired? maybe. I live in an apartment with another girl who has an eating disorder and just my luck, is very very far from recovery. Tonight, I got really sick of my bullshit and finally got myself to make dinner around 9 after 3 ish weeks of beating around it and having goldfish or half a bullshit smushed pbj I didn’t have time to eat at work. however on rare occasion,  all my roomies were here and kiki’ing in the kitchen, when suddenly the other girl gets up and is like “okay fuck it im eating!” after watching me and my other roommate start to cook. Yall. not only does this girl strictly eat diet food to the point where it’s officially fucked with her period cycle, but she gets up and the way i can FEEL her angry beside me on a calorie tracker.... words cannot describe how uncomfortable i feel in this place. its as though im watching my worst moments on a loop and i can’t do anything about it but cry. If i clench my jaw tighter my molar will crack and pierce the soft gums below it.  I don’t know if its me being over my bullshit and knowing i can’t /don’t want to go back to that, or what, but i actually stood there and told myself “you’re finishing making this and you’re going to fucking eat it”. it wasn’t much, i’ll be honest, but i did. It was horrible the entire time and i felt like I was being incredibly judged but jesus christ i ate. and thats going to have to be enough. everything all of the time is just this constant reminder something is wrong with me and im just so tired. im so tired. all i want to do is be okay during this internship and i cant be. How can i be? Its like sticking an addict in a room with nothing but everything at their fingertips, man.  All i want to do is watch a stupid fucking anime with someone i like and feel NORMAL  and i can’t, they’re calling a man who’s at best a 34 a pig boy. all i want to do is go to a theme park and enjoy myself and i CAN’T cause this new friend happens to be obsessed with talking about how bad food is for you!! literally all of the time, and eating fast!  and oh my god did you know that traditoinal mooncakes are wonderful but SOOOOO calorie dense? yeah! they’re actually HORRIBLEEEEE for you! did you know this? because now i do. 

 i just want the luxury of being able to fucking exist, and at this point i don’t think thats genuinely possible. every day the world shows me that i’m one of the worst possible outcomes it seems. i’m this girls worst nightmare. I’m my mothers worst nightmare and yet she tells me im beautiful so whats the truth? but also dont dress that way because it’s not flattering. but also she’d kill to look like me yet i’m what she’s spent her lifetime killing herself to not look like. everyday there’s a new issue. Is it an issue? am I my hair or my legs or my uneven bone structure? am i the issue? and why do people fear me? Do they see my insides from the outside? what can they possibly know when im trying so hard to hide? i’m trying to hide it all, i’m trying to fix it. did i ever really need to fix it? You love my laugh but its too loud and its too ridiculous and i’m too annoying, do i need to be smaller? Are my insecurities really an issue to be fixed? are they really an issue? well it wont be next week....but it’ll swing back the week after! and be in your head all over again and when people are positioned on a certain side you’ll wonder if they focus in on it the same way you do, like when you’re at the movies. you love being there but hate the seats and you’re in your head partially because of how they are positioned and what if you look disgusting what if you’re vile? and oh god are they able to tell?  oh wait, its a new week, and now its not as bad as you thought until oh waIT! oh GOD!  you just saw it again , with worse eyes than before, and now you’re crying in the work bathroom. until wait, let me trade out worrying about this issue with your hair texture. too much right? not enough? the girls always told you you should straighten it. should you start that again? no, you don’t want to, but you know its whats preferred and easier to look at- less of a mess, less loud. 

 I think everyday is just going to be the world telling me something is wrong with me and i’m supposed to now just learn to be okay with that. i dont know, but I wish i was someone who could have the right to just be. 

[dollwritesarchive]

I'm so excited that you finally finished jjk omg! Also I feel you on not wanting to wait for the movie unfortunately I didn't get to see it when it was in theaters 😭 so we'll be watching it at the same time once it's on crunchyroll lol. Do you have any plans to read the manga btw? I'll be honest I don't like reading manga as much as watching anime so I would totally get it if you didn't, Its just that I feel like its gonna take them a while to catch up to the manga and I couldn't wait lol

Also the no hard limits 👀 you're an ✨inspiration✨ LOL but as someone that also doesn't have alot of hard limits I love that 🥰 I definitely think you fit in with some of the other jjk writers bc off the top of my head I'm pretty sure the most fucked up fic I've ever read was a sukuna fic lol like I've seen some people get WILD on here with sukuna and mahito. You know I'm just gonna throw this out there ik it's not for everyone but mahito with tentacles LOL just a thought that I cant get out of my head 👀

fr the day that I read the gb fic for mahitos group is the day that I ASCEND I will probably never recover from that ❤

Also I'm probably gonna finally start aot now that I know you're gonna write for it, you've given me the push I needed lol

Some more tiktoks for you 😘

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRydmgu7/?k=1

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRydx6q7/?k=1 STOP HES SO CUTE 😭

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRydFVjM/?k=1

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRyd6gEp/?k=1

OMG YOU HAVENT SEEN IT EITHER? Then I’m very excited to hear all your thoughts on it once we watch it!! ❤️ I think Toge has the spiky hair in that? Which is honestly a fucking look

BUT it is gonna be weird not seeing Mahito 😭 my baby boy 😭😭

I don’t think I’ll read it; I don’t read much manga (I don’t have the time and brainpower DKDKKSK) ! The last one I read was funouhan which honestly, very underrated. If you like gore and horror and a sexy wicked man (which I know you do 🤪) definitely give that one a try too if you’ve the time! (But maybe don’t read it around folks because it’s pretty nsfw sometimes) I don’t think there’s an anime that accompanies it. I do think there’s a live action movie but I’ve never seen it. But let me just appreciate usobuki rq 🥰

IVE CONSIDERED MAHITO WITH TENTACLES. Here’s the thing is that I know he would manipulate his shape when you fucked like that’s just so obvious and he’d do it just to be cruel 😭 you’d be so overwhelmed by him already, and then he’s making you take another him in your ass or he doubles his size just to see it poke out of your belly THE MANS SO EVIL I LOVE HIM

The gb fic ideas I have MY BELOVEDS I really need to get on them because I can see them both so clearly in my head and they’re FILTH pure dark FILTH (poor reader, that’s what I’ll say. Poor thing trying to take them all 🥹)

OMG ??? DO YOU KNOW HOW HAPPY THAT MAKES ME

Okay confession (justwhenithoughtisaidallicansaymychickonthesidesaidshegotoneontheway) AOT is, without question, without a shadow of a doubt, my favorite anime of all time. it took me a year after it came out to start it and I was hooked EVER SINCE. Levi Ackerman? My ultimate anime husband. If I had to pick one and only one, I’d choose him EVERY TIME. I would love love love to hear your reactions and thoughts about AOT when you watch it although I will say please power through season 1. It’s not bad but trust me it gets REALLY GOOD seasons 2 and 3.

YES MY TIKTOK FUEL

The gambling scene is still too much for me like mahito is so WHINY HE THROWS A TANTRUM

TOGE TRYING THE VERONICA TREND FIDKKDKD I would open the door before he even started singing I’m sorry but you are not getting away from me ❤️

Also just choso in general DAMN

That last tiktok… you know exactly what to show me. You UNDERSTAND the Doll Gaze ™️

SO SINCE YOU ALWAYS PROVIDE THE GOODS WITH THE JJK TIKTOKS (please keep them coming as much as you want 🥰 they’re all incredible) I would like to share some levi with you in hopes to convince you even more to watch aot !!

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRydCau1/?k=1

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRydVojy/?k=1

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRydbLgK/?k=1

ALSO PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK watch it subbed. Do not get subjected to Levi’s blink 182 sounding voice in the dubbed version 💀

[baeshijima]

𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫!𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫!𝐲/𝐧

MASTERLIST

now, childe as a general streamer,,, he’s a whale in every sense of the word 

…

poggers—

so childe as a streamer in general would be one word ;

✨chaotic✨

he would definitely be a variety streamer, but more so for games !!

especially pvp and/or pve games

competitive meta mf—

probably plays LoL, overwatch, apex legends, valorant and minecraft

don’t question the minecraft 

he likes mining but has a personal vendetta against the creepers bc once they blew up his mansion 

yes, a mansion

ask any of his community and they’ll tell u he spent a full-blown month and a half playing just minecraft to build it, only for it to go down just like that ;-; 

his chat loved it tho <//3

he’s played honkai too !! mainly for the pve and grinding bc he’s a whale but uh,,, shhh

his community,,, his community are just a bunch of trolls at this point i cant even lie

they just KEKW, SADGE & COPIUM spam everything and the newer viewers get intimidated until they realise he deserves them all HJGKJHF

especially when he starts getting annoyed by the game,,, his reactions are too good to pass up on gn

typically when he does mario kart streams 👩‍🦯 that shit’s wild when it happens oh my

when he falls in rainbow road 🤡 

and especially bc he has his webcam on, his viewers just see him internally dying or wanting to scream

also gets passive aggressive 

shit talks everything and everyone when in that mood <//3

for what’s left of his dignity i won’t disclose what happens

definitely gets jebaited a lot too <//3 unfortunately he’s too easy for his chat ;-;

another mf with a massive community except he has a lot of friends (sorry not sorry albedo)

ppl have a love-hate relationship with him tbh; u either love him or hate him

no inbetween

unless u show ur love through bullying him then go off ig

his discord server, twt + yt are also really big too !! also verified on insta 

also !!

he has lots of plushies :(( esp whale plushies from his community bc he’s the biggest whale they know <//3

but if u look at his setup, there’s a mini whale plushie on the top of his main monitor (he has 3), one big one (like,,, up to his chin) behind him, a smol on the top of his chair so u can see it above his head, and just more off screen HKJSDHL

they asked for a room tour once and half of it was just whale plushies

the rest were LED lights + shelves of merch & gifts from his community !!

he even has some fanmail (actual wholesome ones that aren’t cursed) pinned on a board too 🥺

also has an ensuite—

when he was eating on stream one time, his chat was sent into an absolute outrage

u know why?

bc he was eating noodles with a fork

bby ;-;

so sometimes he’ll get sent those beginner chopsticks with the finger guides to help him 👩‍🦯

he’s actually made sure to eat with them on stream tho bc he was sent one with a narwhal on top and he thinks it’s cute JHGJKH

nOW ONTO THIS MAN BEING WHIPPED FOR U AS A GENSHIN STREAMER !!!!

herkekle

now, his (also) AR56 ass has been playing since genshin first came out

an og if u will

this man,,, he’s been in love with u even before the game’s official release 🐥

not only were u in the promotional art and trailers, but he was also one of the beta testers so he got to try out ur character first hand in the early stages !!

and when i say he fell hard for u,

i mean it 

when the game wasn’t released publicly yet, he wasn’t allowed to disclose any information and ngl, it killed him that he couldn’t talk abt u :((

so all he could do was say this upcoming was really nice so far and subtly brag abt u to everyone JHGKJSDFHLK

when the official ads & promotional art were finally released 🥺🥺 when i tell u he immediately went live talking abt the game and u HKGJHFDK

he didn’t care that he streamed at an ungodly hour bc he’s been waiting for the reveal for so long he needs to let everyone know </3

he retweeted everything from their official twt straightaway, made a yt video based off his spontaneous stream promoting the game + pinged his entire server abt it

yes

his nearly 200k server all got pinged abt this one game bc he’s in love with a character from it

and he has no regrets abt it <33

the day the game was available for download, he stREAMED THE ENTIRE DOWNLOAD PROCESS

while he and his chat were waiting, they decided to watch the trailers and character showcases to get a feel for the game, and played some mario kart to pass the time !!

as soon as the game loaded, he threw mario kart behind him and went on 🐥

he typed his name (ajax) for the when he chose aether and literally everyone was appreciating the aesthetics HKJFS

but childe,,, he was waiting for it to be over so he could see u ;-;

he appreciated the aesthetics, fighting mechanics & voice acting a lot tho !!

now he had gotten through all the tutorials, got all the chests he could he was finally in mond

and there u were 🥺 after the dvalin encounter u arrived before kaeya did

and boy did he show u off sm to his viewers HKJHKLF

they knew he was down bad before but now?? they know it’s hopeless to save him and if he ever falls out of love that’s when the world ends

luckily that’ll never happen tho <33

but he took !! so many !! screenshots !!

oh, and did i mention he changed his wallpapers to u? and his twt + discord pfps are also some very aesthetic screenshots of u from that first scene ;-;

he just appreciates u sm okay 🥺

he even clutched his chest where his heart is and sunk down his chair when he heard u speak 😩

his chat just spammed his downbad + y/nlove + SHRIMP emotes and he accepted them all with grace <33

now when he unlocks the wishing feature,,, u already know he’s wishing for u as soon as possible

ur in the standard banner so ur always there which he appreciates but he would’ve wanted u to be limited so he can rub it in ppl’s faces ;-;

and since it was the first release rewards, he had tons of wishes right off the bat !!

he was gonna roll for venti after he gets u bc,,, well does he need a reason??

also he doesn’t do well with archer characters in general ;;; but if ur an archer then ur obv an exception sooo

bUT he got a 5 star in his first 20 pulls !!

tho it was diluc 👩‍🦯

while he was happy bc he got an incredibly meta character right off the bat,

he wasn’t interested in diluc,,, (even now his diluc is barely looked after, and only used for spiral abyss, *sweats*)

the next 5 star he got was around the 60 mark, and he got a weapon,,,

i mean,,, he got the weapon that was most suited for u so that’s smth at least (ˉ▽ˉ；)

after he used all his remaining primos and fates, he finally got u 🥺

he just went “fuck the storyline” and immediately put u in his party and just

admired u as a whole 

went through all the voice lines available, ur character story, ur idle animations (he had a heart attack from u and his chat clipped it) and took many, many screenshots 

his favourite voice lines would have to be the night + about us + (y/n)’s hobbies

and then he equipped u with ur weapon and damnnn did u look so good with it 😩

he changed u to be his avatar, with his signature as :

“(y/n)’s whale <3”

and now the whaling process begins 👩‍🦯

after at least £2k, he got u to c6, along with at least 1 copy of all the standard 5 stars,,

then he went for venti’s banner—

his chat were just too focused on how he’s gonna play u to even think of anything else tbh HKJAH

with ur kit, u were honestly seen to be a dps or even a sub dps if ppl don’t want u on the field all the time

so definitely a perfect character for mr meta strimmer tartaglia (his twitch name btw ;;; childe is just smth he prefers his community to call him as but they also call him ajax too HKJSD) here

so he went through the archon quests with u as his carry and i won’t lie, ur name card is smth he has printed and framed behind him after he got it 🥺

he later finds out ur part of the fatui in the liyue archon quest tho and has to fight u with,,,

well, u ;;;

he finds it hot tho so it’s okay—

i won’t lie tho, his zhongli after he got him is his second strongest after u

he just builds all his characters in the most broken way he can so he can show his viewers that everyone can be a dps in their own right, not just the ones meant to be since there’s no right or wrong in this game !!

but now ur weapon is r5, ur lvl 90 and u have lvl 20 5 star artifacts that make u the most broken (y/n) seen

ppl who co op with him are honestly baffled,,, especially when the feature of them being able to view other players’ character stats become available,,,

u with ur nearly 3k atk,,,

he’s hit over 600k with u tho and he’ll always flex that

no one can top him as a (y/n) main and that’s honestly just a fact at this point 😩

when he saw that the dating sim hangouts was official, his immediate and iconic response was simply ;

“so when will (y/n) become a dateable, huh 🤨”

to this day he’s still waiting to be able to date u in-game <//3

[boldlyvoid]

Spencer and fem!reader have been together for a decade, married for five. They got married right after the Justin Mills episode, she proposed cause she almost lost him. He proposed to her once he got out and she had no idea he was going to. Anyway I got off on a tangent sorry I have ADHD. But anyway so part of Spencer was scared she’d leave him while he was in prison, which of course she never would. Not only because they have a three year old daughter. She of course doesn’t, and they’re both there to greet him when he’s released eighty-four days later. She’d been using porn to pleasure herself while he was gone, but it wasn’t nearly the same. He’s been so pent up that he jumps her the second they get back to his apartment. Needless to say, she wasn’t expecting him to be even more dominant when he got out of prison than he had started to be when he went in.

so i changed it up a bit, she hasn't had an orgasm since he left. she's so touch starved becasue she cant even hold his hand at visiting hours and they both can't help but fuck the second she tell's him they're bringing him home.

word count: 1.4K

cw: unprotected sex, dirty talk, daddy kink, dom!spencer, wall fucking, public sex, creampies, talk of pregnancy, touch starved reader and spencer, canon typical violence, references to PTSD, (I hope I got it all)

She’s anxiously tapping her foot, she’s been awake for 48 hours now, she hasn’t seen her daughter in just as long, and her husband even longer.

84 days to be exact.

She feels like she’s going to explode, she misses him so intensely and if he doesn’t come home now, she might never see him again. His mother is missing, he stabbed himself to stay safe in prison, he might not come home. again.

In the 10 years that she’s been with Spencer, he’s almost died 3 times. she thought that was the extent of her worry for her husband's safety... then he went missing, then he was arrested in Mexico and now he’s in prison fighting for his life.

She has her head in her hands, curled into a ball on the briefing room sofa, trying desperately to get her mind to stop saying he’s dead, they’re going to kill him, you’re too late. Over and over and over, the thoughts are so intense she almost doesn’t hear Emily call in and tell them to go get him.

It’s time to bring him home.

She stands faster than before. Faster than when they found the cemetery. Faster than when he almost coded in the ambulance from the anthrax he was exposed to. The only time it rivals is when the doctors came out and said they stopped the bleeding, 2 weeks before they eloped, 9 weeks into a pregnancy they were trying to hide from the team.

She always finds herself rushing to his side, fearing the worst but never has she been this close to the edge. She’s on the plane with JJ, Luke and Penelope faster than she’s ever moved before. Leg still bouncing as she sits, trying her best to stay awake, but her adrenaline is making her dizzy.

“Y/N,” JJ whispers from across the table, “he’s okay.”

“I know,” she whispers back. “That’s not why I’m nervous.”

“Why are you?”

She turns and sees Penelope and Luke arguing in the back, flirting way too much to eavesdrop, she takes a deep breath.

“I haven’t touched him in 3 months,” she whispers. “You guys may not think he’s a touchy person, but I haven’t slept. I don’t know how to sleep without him beside me. I haven’t had a real hug in forever…” a tear falls down her cheek.

She shakes her head, it’s been so unbelievably hard to be separated from him and she’s kept her composure this long. “I haven’t even been able to touch myself.”

She’s ashamed but JJ doesn’t budge, she simply tilts her head to the side in sympathy, “oh honey, he might be really distant, you have to prepare for him to continue to not touch you, or he might not leave your side and drive your crazy. I’m not sure how he’ll react but I know it’s not going to be easy.”

She nods, releasing a shaky breath and pretending that it’s not making her more anxious, “I know.” She finally breaks, sobbing and hiding her face behind her hands. “I’m sorry.”

JJ gets up and moves around the table, rubbing her hand over her back and shushing her, “you can tell him. You can go in and have a few minutes alone with him, Penelope and I will wait in the hallway.”

“I just want a hug,” she whispers, “I’m not going to fuck my husband in a prison.”

“Bundy did it,” Luke replies from the back of the plane because of course, they were listening in. “Plus, I don’t think he’s going to be comfortable enough to do that yet, I think his mind is on saving his mother.”

“Exactly,” Y/N rationalizes it, even if all she can picture is him bending her over that table that she wasn’t allowed to cross.

Sometimes the prison was so intimidating for her that she felt like she wasn’t even allowed to look at him. It was easier for her to send letters, they corresponded regularly. She knew everything, on a level the team didn’t, she knew just how hurt he was in there and she was already preparing for his recovery.

She has a binder in her purse, it has every resource he’ll ever need. Random information pamphlets for him to read on the way home and his sponsor's number. She got it from the VA, taking a special trip with Luke to ask the men there what they wish they had when they came home from Afghanistan, how they coped with PTSD and what they wish their partners knew beforehand. She’s as prepared as she could be.

But nothing prepares her for the look on his face when she opens the door. The guard steps aside and JJ closes the door as soon as Y/N is safely inside the room with him, she just cries.

“Is my mom okay?” He panic, “who’s watching Elly?”

“Spence,” she walks up to him, “we’re taking you home.”

“What?” His face drops, he turns as white as a ghost like he’s hallucinating and doesn’t believe what he hears.

She simply nods and throws her arms around him, holding him tighter than ever before, he holds her just as tight. She can’t breathe, he’s holding her too tight and then he’s picking her up and sitting her on the table, kissing her neck and down her shirt and she can’t help herself from leaning back and attempting to unbutton his jeans.

He pushes her skirt up and pulls her panties to the side, roughly kissing her as she stokes him a few times before wrapping her legs around him and bringing him inside. His beard is longer than it’s ever been, scratching at her skin as he explores her, she can’t believe they’re actually doing this but it feels too good for her to even say a single word.

“God, I’ve missed your sweet cunt,” he grunts in her ear, picking her up and turning them. He presses her against the brick wall, holding her with a strength he’s never had before, and fucking into her with intent.

“I haven’t cum in 90 days,” she says between pants, wanting him to praise her.

“So that’s why you’re such a desperate slut? I’ve made you into a whore over the last 10 years, haven’t I?”

“Yes sir,” she replies on instinct, they’ve tried having him be more dominating but it never really worked out in their favour… this however, this is more than that.

This is primal.

He bites her shoulder, over her shirt and making the fabric wet, grunting as he fucks her, he’s like an animal. It’s incredibly hot, she’s so deprived she almost cums but she holds off, “please?” She begs, wanting his permission for the first time in months.

“Please what?”

“Please can I cum?” she cries, actually tears fall down her cheeks from the frustration, months of anticipation bursting at the seams, “please, daddy?”

“Ugh,” he lays his forehead on her shoulder and fucks into her harder, rubbing her clit with his thumb. “Cum baby, come on daddy’s cock, you depraved little whore.”

She tosses her head back against the wall, it’s going to hurt later but her orgasm is so intense she barely even feels real. She’s floating there as she grips his shoulders and her legs hold him close to her. He stills as he cums, filling her up, they both sigh at the same time.

Sliding to the floor, she’s still wrapped around him, cock inside her as they hold each other. Faces buried in the other's neck, they try to come down but all they can do is run their hands over each other's bodies, appreciating the fact they’re allowed to hold one another in this stupid room again, no one is going to yell at her for holding his hand or passing him a bracelet from their kid.

They hear a knock on the window and that’s their queue to get presentable again. She feels a little gross, but this is the closest she’s felt to him in forever. Carrying a part of him inside of her was her favourite thing in the world, all she could hope for was another little one to be the glorious result of this terrible situation.

[gnocchighoul]

the demons brothers + a touch starved mc

Lucifer

If you’re going to Lucifer because you’re touch starved, then you’re definitely going to be close to him already -- he doesn’t let just anyone touch him.

.......He’s also touch starved but won’t admit it, so one of you is gonna just have to bite the bullet and make a move.

(It’s gonna have to be you)

You’re going to have to go about this carefully--make a really good plan and then execute it flawlessly.

Literally just throw yourself at him. 

He’ll catch you. 

Probably.

Nothing says ‘give me affection’ quite like yeeting yourself off the staircase at him, and he definitely understands what you want when you latch on tight to him like a weird little barnacle that he cant peel off no matter how hard he tries dfghjkkgf

He’s really warm and he smells Really nice and he hugs you so tight, like it’s the last chance he’ll ever get, so he’s honestly one of the best snuggle buddies. 

He’s gonna act all fussy about your love-attack at first--just play with his hair and smother him with lots of kisses and he won’t be able to resist snuggling u. Or banging u, but that’s your choice

Y’know, because “demons can’t resist temptation” and all that jazz. 

(tbh he just likes likes you alot)

Mammon

...Why are you staring at him like you wanna eat him?

Seriously, knock it off, you’re freaking him out!

Wait, why are you coming closer…? Get Back you Fiend don’t you DARE wrap your arms around him and nuzzle your face into his chest like that what the FU--

...Oh.

Huh. This is kinda nice.

(Just hug him. If you want his affection, just wrestle him into a bear hug and don’t. let. go.)

At first, Mammon doesn’t really understand affection that isn’t along the lines of a friendly/loving punch. He’s not used to kindness. It’s a fucking tragedy. 

He doesn’t know how to ask for love because I don’t think he even realizes thats an option, tbh. 

He’s kind of like an unsocialized puppy--will definitely put up a fight until he realizes that, hey, being snuggled is nice.

Luckily for Mams, you are touch starved and determined to show his stupidass what affection is supposed to be like. 

He’s going to get so blushy. Sooo blushy. He totally pretends to not like it at first, but inside he’s over the fucking moon happy.

It takes him a while, but eventually, he realizes that he can ask you for snuggles too. At first he’s all “C’mere human, I bet you’re just itchin’ for me to hug ya, so let me make all your dreams come true!”

(It’s a defense mechanism.)

But over time, he eventually seeks you out and just flops on top of ya, and doesn’t feel the need to make a big show about it.

He feels safe with you, and that’s priceless.

Levi

Is incredibly confused about why you’re seeking out him for affection.

When you ask him if you can give him a hug, he expects you to just like... Wrap one arm around his shoulders for .2 seconds. 

Which doesn’t sound too bad, so he says “Um, sure, I guess? I dunno why you’d want to though” 

So when you climb into his lap and wrap your arms around him like a koala bear, his brain straight up blue-screens. 

Seriously, he forgets how to breathe. Don’t squeeze him too hard or he might never restart.

You smooch him on his cheek and his soul promptly leaves his body and is ejected into the atmosphere at mach 5.

This is literally better than Heaven. And he would know, he used to live there.

He totally freezes up and makes a wheezy sound that’s somewhere along the scale of “Dying Animal” and “Exploding Sink”

Needless to say, you create a snuggle monster.

I promise you that you’re never going to be touch starved again, because once you’ve given Levi a taste, he can’t get enough. 

He constantly needs to be touching you. Holding your hand or the fabric of your shirt, leaning against you, sitting with you in his lap while he plays video games--it literally doesn’t matter, he just needs that contact with you or he might literally die. 

He’s very enthusiastic about it dfghkfd

Satan

Look… Satan is very smart. 

But he’s also incredibly dense at times. 

You have to be blunt with him, or else he’s just not going to know what you want.

(Feelings that aren’t all consuming anger and hatred are still a bit new to him--he’s learning as he goes)

Just walk up to him and tell him that you need him to snuggle you right now, dammit. Lay your soul bare to him. 

He really does love that you trust him. It makes him feel all weird and fuzzy inside.

And how can he possibly say no when you set his heart alight?

That said, he is a bit of an over-thinker. 

Worries about crossing boundaries or making you uncomfortable and a million other things--give him lots of reassurance pls

He isn’t opposed at all to cuddle sessions, especially if he’s able to read at the same time. 

It definitely becomes a normal thing to cocoon yourselves up in a really fluffy blanket to read together.

Satan is honestly one of the best to snuggle with because he’s very chill about it. You want this and he wants this, so he doesn’t see a point in playing games.

So yeah, he’s chill! But he’ll also threaten the life of anybody who interrupts you guys 

Asmo

Please, he knows that you’re touch starved before you even do.

Until you’re upfront about it, he’s going to tease you by like, patting your head, playing footsie with you, giving you only the briefest of hugs--just slowly giving you a taste of his affection until you finally cave and demand that he snuggles you properly. 

(Is that a euphemism? It could be lol)

As soon as you ask he’s gonna push you down onto the nearest couch/bed/whatever and just flop on top of you. 

Honestly, Asmo wants You to be the one holding Him. He wants to use your chest as a pillow, and doesn’t he just look so cute all snuggled up to you like this? He totally does, you should take a pic of him!

Cuddle sessions are absolutely going to become a regular thing, and he makes them into a big event each time. My mans Asmo is gonna bust out the candles and the softest blankets and the fluffiest pillows.

If the opportunity strikes, he’s definitely gonna try to bang you.

If not, expect to do face-masks together. Maybe manicures. But definitely the face-masks, at least.

He’s gonna spin this into a fuckfest or a self care session--it really just depends on what you prefer sdghjk

Once you’re in his arms, he will tickle you. rip

Beel

He is the BEST hugger in the whole entire world.

When you approach him and ask for cuddles he will pull you into a hug without hesitation.

I do not care how tall you are, Beel is taller. He will engulf you in a hug and rest his chin on your head and sway you back and forth 

You want a piggyback ride? Hop on. 

Just wanna watch tv and snuggle? Great idea! :D but maybe don’t watch cooking shows or he’s gonna drool on you dfghj

(lowkey I think he would really enjoy watching human movies with you. He found Mamma Mia to be absolutely enchanting)

Want him to lay on top of you and crush you until all of your woes have been squeezed away? He will absolutely oblige you

Congratulations on your newly acquired teddy bear! Please don’t forget to feed him.

Literally just sit on his lap or wrap your arms around him whenever you want, he’s always down for a good snuggle. 

He’s by far the nicest about it too, he won’t tease you about it and he will never hold back from telling you exactly how much he loves holding you in his arms

Definitely loves to be the big spoon but has no problems with being the little spoon either. 

He’s just so fuckimg SWEET

Belphie

Oh, you're touch starved? Perfect. He's been in the market for a good snuggle buddy.

You silly human, why didn’t you come to him sooner?

Don’t listen to what Asmo says, snuggles are Belphie’s domain.

Once it’s established that you two are going to be snuggle buddies, he will literally just abduct you for snuggle time. 

He doesn’t care what you’re doing, he’s going to throw you over his shoulder like a sack of flour and haul you off to his blanket nest whenever he wants.

He just wants you all to himself. 

Will share your snuggle time with Beel tho.

After abducting you, he's just gonna toss you onto his bed and fall on top of you. He's really warm and he really just wants to lay on you. Partially so that you cant escape once he falls asleep lmaoo

He's happy to just talk to you about whatever you want while you guys get your snuggle on, but be warned: he's eventually going to fall asleep. 

Probably mid sentence. 

He won’t wake up when you poke at his cheeks or shake him, either. So uh. I hope you’re in the mood for a nap too!

Get matching sloth onesies with him. He’ll tell you it’s stupid but he’s actually thrilled with them. (Make sure you also get Beel a bear one though)

((part two with the undateables + Luke))

[snalsupremacy]

2022 events (complete!)

- Disclaimer: These are not all of the events that happened in 2022, just the ones I happen to come across.

-Circus band plays megalovania to the Pope -Tumbrl/IOS mega ban causes tumbrl to create a new language -Tumbrl has become too profitable, unlike CW who hasn't been profitable since 2006 -Italian senate zoom bombed with r34 of Tifa from Final Fantasy -Microsoft bought Activation Blizzard for 70 billion -10th Capybara long bath championship (this isnt much of an notable event but I just found out it exists and now so do you) -Netflix stocks plummet -TOTALLY SPIES REBOOT??? -Green M&M drama GUYS ITS NOT EVEN FEB CAN U CALL DOWN - GREEN M&M DRAMA WAS A DISTRACTION TO CHILD LABOR LAWSUIT??!? -Percy Jackson Disney+ series -Did the cryptoland thing happen this year?

-Maus school ban in Tennessee -The yassification of Pinocchio -Everybody is into Wordle -TikToker getting rejected by prestigious college? Scandalous! -Famous Brazilian podcaster publicly supports the foundation of a Nazi political party - Kirby car. Carby. - Palmeiras ainda não tem mundial :( -super bowl or whatever. Palmeiras was so close I could feel it. -Mitski's Laurell Hell on top 5 bill board??? -Incredibly I made it this far without even mentioning that Russia is trying to invade Ukraine -Petrópolis (RJ, Brazil) flods for the second time, killing hundreds -New yuri on ice official art in 2022, I don't even know what to say -Ukraine is getting evacuated -Kanye West insta breakdown -Arthur ends -Monster High reboot Draculaura's design slaps!! -Russia invades Ukraine -Texas anti-trans law now investigating trans kids' families for child abuse -ITS ME BOY IM THE PS5 SPEAKING TO YOU INSIDE YOUR BRAIN -Cheese belly weed cat started pokemon gen 9 or smth

-Live Slug reaction - THEY ADDED VIKTOR'S RING SHAKING PISSING CRYING -Florida's don't say gay bill - Disney supports don't say gay bill but Disney workers protest and now Disney doesn't -Parents mad at turning red for showing teenage girls periods, which they have, and twitter mad at them showing cringe drawings, which they also have -Purim and Patrick's Day coincidence which leads to a lot of drunks -DROP THE CAR BATTERY -Everybody watching the 8 hour victorius video (??) -Situation in Ukraine keeps getting worse - Gas price skyrocket now that countries is refusing to import russian gasoline -Jaiden animations comes out as aroace -Evergiven anniversary celebration by having the same ship cross the canal -US politician died? -WILL SMITH SLAPS THE SHIT OUT OF CHRIS ROCK ON THE OSCARS also many outfits slapped I am looking (respecfully) at zendaya and timothee chalamet

-Happy april fool's day! Tumbrl did a hole ass click-a-thon with bunch of crabs and even an small text rpg, cool! Also Brick head tumbrl sexymen?? -what happens in April 3rd??? Why is danny phantom everywhere??? Also grammys -R/Place becomes the first virtual active warzone between fandoms. fun! -Sonic 2 hell..... yes (also sonic 3? cant wait!) - LAPD sending in like 100 police men for literally 4 environmental scientists peacefully protesting -Namona re-newed by netflix me thinks - Scart finally gets his accorn as a goodbye to BlueSky studios - Elon Musk tries to buy twitter -Ramadan Easter Pessach combo -Rihanna's boyfrend arrested -Tumbrl blaze drops -MISHA COLLINS COMES OUT AS BISEXUAL -Johnny Depp and Amber Heard lawsuit -Netflix reveals that they lost like 200,00 + 700,00 (from russia) subscribers and expect to lose more -OMG IT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING MISHA COMES OUT AS STR8 💀💀 -Elon Musk BUYS TWITTER - Oh yeah Morbius - James Corden leaves late late show lets goooo

- GOP draft leak of trying to overrule roe v wade drops while Met Gala is happening -Everyone into Dracula daily -Eurovision week! Veggies and Pussy will be for ever in my heart. - NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SONG NEW MCR SON -UK GETS SECOND PLACE??? WTF???? Ukraine wins, NOT LATVIA???? WTF???? - Finland joins NATO - holy shit. Avatar 2. its out, its finally out -Still not fully convinced but hxh might return?? -OH OH OH ITS NOT FAKE ITS NOT FAKE HXH WILL RETURN HOLY SHIT SHAKING AND CRYING RN HXH IS COMING BACK GAHSGSAJ -Happy 3rd anniversary to Promare, best t4t anime couple i will not elaborate -Texas elementary school shooting, 21 dead -Guy throws cake at mona lisa - BTS meets with Joe Biden at the White House??? -Pokemon V&S legendary drop

-Back by unpopular demand: morbius in theaters -Berserk is back -Gravity Falls 10 year anniversary! as a present we got the full we'll meet again song and SO MUCH shade from talks alex had about censorship issues -California ruled that in some situations bees can be considered fish so that it can be protected under the endangered species law -That AI machine that can generate images (DALL-E) -Internet Explorer shuts down -Pikachu man ad nightmare fuel - 3 NEW ATLA MOVIES COMING OUT LETS GO -Elon Musk getting sued or smth -Overruled Roe v Wade - Oslo shooting at LGBT club kills 2 and harms 21 more - Technoblade dies of cancer at 23

- Tributes to Technoblade continue such as other streamers and Minecraft itself - Shooting at 4th of July parade at Chicago, 6 dead - Boris Johnson +50-ish ministers resign in like 48 hours - Kazuki Takahashi, creator of Yu Gi Oh, found dead at a beach - Shinzo Abe, Japan's previous prime minister is assassinated during public speech -Argentinian Economy Minister resigns - Luis Echeverria, Mexican ex-president, dies at 100 - Elon Musk pulls out on Twitter deal and Twitter sues him for that -Georgia Guidestones destroyed - José Eduardo dos Santos, Angolan ex-president, dies at 79 - Sri Lanka's economy collapses, protester storm Gotabaya Rajapaksa's (President) house, as well as setting fire to Ranil Wickremesinghe's (PM) house - Finally good news! The James Webb telescope released some images and they are absolutely BEAUTIFUL! - Ivana Trump (Trump's ex wife) dies of yet unknown causes (Update: I think she fell off stairs?) - The Looney Tunes social media managers just confirmed Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck are a couple???? - Stray is a cat simulator is think? kinda like the goose thing back in like 2018? -Pink sauce that actually kills people -Start Trek actress nichelle nichols dies at 89

- Shakira may be going to prison for Tax Evasion???? - Jo Soares dies at 84 - One of Trump's houses gets raided by the FBI - Bridget from guilty gear confirmed trans! big w! - Serena Williams retires - Olivia Newton-John  dies at 73 - Fan fiction AO3 OTW tiffany election something along those lines idk i dont read - HBO Max Cartoon Network purge

-Florence Pugh arrives at venice film festival while the rest of the cast for Don't Worry Darling does a press interview (?) -Supernatural trending, 3 dead 11 injured - Chris Pine exposed for being and erotica writer and like 5 other things - Dan and Phil posted a video where multiple things are said but mainly notable female celebrity suggested a threesome which is just so funny - Reigen vs Sans finale of the ultimate tumbrl sexyman election interrupted by the death of Queen Elizabeth II - Sans wins bc of he does. Was there even a questions? How tf did reigen even get that high up?? -TRISHA PAYTAS GIVES BIRTH RIGHT AFTER THE QUEEN DIES - TOBY FOX WRITES REIGEN VS SANS FANFICTION WHAT IS GOING ON - Reigen istg he won babygirl awards, anime twink, sexiest anime girl, the nobel peace prize, Dilf, Milf, -Meghan Markle wears the exact same fit as Diana's for the funeral - Harry Styles may or may not spit in Chris Pine's face - SPAMTON SWEEPSTAKES! DONATE AND MAYBE YOU TOO CAN BE A [BIG SHOT] -Iranian police kills woman (Mahsa Amini) over not properly wearing compulsory hijab, causes street riots -New James Webb picture of Saturn! Those pics re-awakening my love for space - 50 twitch dramas one in a row for like 5 days i don't even have the energy to name them all - Huge drama chess involving alleged cheating via anal beads and playing naked to prove wrong what is going on - Brazilian presidential election is like trying to decide between drowning and being on fire - Adam Levine exposed not only for cheating but being catastrophically bad at flirting - Ghost Files! The ghoul boys are back! - Ned from Try Guys cheats on his wife and is consequently gets kicked out of the team - Tumbrl lifts porn ban

- Sacheen Littlefeather dies - Dream face reveal - Bolsonaro and Lula for 2nd term election - Velma canonically lesbian for new Scooby Doo movie - Smth ab She-Hulk I dont have the energy to understand - Mario movie traler release went just as expected: Jack Black sold it and Chris Pratt... is trying his best - SNL parodies the Try Guys video where they announce Ned's leaving by making fun of everyone but ned :/// -Robbie Coltrane (who plays Hagrid in the Harry Potter movies) dies - Minecraft Mob voting! -SNIFFER WINS WHOOO -AO3 reaches 10M works - Markiplier will start an OnlyFans if he beats Joe Rogan in podcasts - Climate activists throw tomatoe soup in Van Gogh's Sunflower - UK PM resigns in 45 days -Elon Musk buys twitter

-Kit Connor forced to come out as Bisexual - Ryan Reynalds joins tumblr on... -The 2 year anniversary of canon destiel - Dracula Daily ends - I think Tommyinnit os on Tumbrl? The poor soul - Chris Evans chosen by People's magazine as the sexiest man alive, good for him! - American midterm elections -Ash from Pokemon finally becomes the very best that no one ever was - Kevin Conroy, famous va for Batman, dies at 66 - Trump announces he will run for 2024 presidential election - Two missiles (allegedly) from Russia hit Polish borders and kills 2 civilians, may cause call for article 5 of NATO - SpaceX launches another rockets i think? - Shane reveals he's a raylo shipper - Pokemon scarlet and violet releases and surprised! Its full of bugs bc its rushes -Breaking news: Sonic frontiers does NOT suck, its not perfect but MAN that means so much to sonic fans - AO3 down - AO3 back up -Jason David Frank, the original green Power Ranger, dies at 49 -Gerar putting their whole he/they pussy into those concert outfits he's been trending for a week now! - I'm so glad more people are talking about Goncharov (1973) is gaining more popularity its literally my favorite mafia film - Colorado shooting at LGBTQ+ club, 5 dead, suspect had already sent bomb threats a year prior and has charges for kidnapping but no one thought that maybe a guy like that should not own a gun :D -The walking dead just ended but most importantly IT WAS RUNNING THIS ENTIRE TIME??? -ARGENTINA LOST TO SAUDI ARABIA LETS GO BRAZIL WE GOT A CHANCE WE GOT THIS VAI BRASIL 100% JESUS VAMO HEXA - VAI BRASIL VAI RICHARLISON FUCK NEYMAR 2 A 0 2 A 0 VAMO HEXA - Argentina won against Mexico i guess :/ - Martin Scorcese acknowledges Goncharov, ending this crazy week of blogging with a bang -Christine McVie, Singer/songwriter of Fleetwood Mac, dies at 79 -Argentina wins again 🙄

-Ye (Kanye West) ruining his career interview by interview - Smth important politically happened in the US Destiel is trending again -US basketball player released from Russian prison in exchange of arms dealer -BRAZIL SPEAK TO ME -Argentina won AGAIN👹 - Elon Musk booed off stage a comedy show - Markiplied drops the OnlyFans and so many people join the site literally broke - Warrior Nun cancelled -JOJOLANDS RELEASE DATE FEB 17TH CANT COME SOON ENOUGH FEB 17TH CANT COME SOON ENOUGH -Argentina wins the world cup :/// I mean better than frnace ig -Messi pic on insta with the trophy beats the egg in most liked image -IM NOT OK ASH AND PIKACHU ARE LEAVING POKEANIME OMG HE MET WITH BUTTERFREE HE'S SAYING GOODBYE TO HIS OLD PALS OMG NO ONE TALK TO ME -BARBIE MOVIE TRAILER YESSS -The Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery out on netflix, and it's good! also Blanc canonically gay and is dating hugh grant in the movies? - Greta Thunberg twet burned andrew tate so hard, he made a comeback video which revealed his location, leading to his arrest!! ANDREW TATE ARRESTED!! -Last OOTT of the year ToT -Pelé, greatest soccer player of all time, died at 82 -This is not nearly as big as anything else on this list but this is my list and I get to put out whatever I want. SZIN POSTED NEW HYBRID HEROES EPISODE WOOOOOOOOO -Former pope died -Bolsonaro escapes to US i bet he won't come back to Brazil -Oof! what a year! see you all in 2023!

[nat-20s]

#10?

prompt 10- recognizing the other's voice in a crowded room

so uhh u didn't specify this being a pairing, and it ended up jonmartin lol

this is like? an au where one of the domains of the lonely (and also maybe stranger) plays off the specific loneliness that comes with parties. u kno the one, where you have fun for about an hour and then realize that you're fundamentally isolated and you need a breather?

anyway

~*~

Upon opening his eyes, he is not where he last remembers being. He is not sure how long his disorientation will last, but considering he's standing up right, at the edge of a crowded ballroom, he suspects it may be the entire time that he's here.

He had fallen asleep on the couch, the TV blaring away on a program he didn't know any of the details of. It hadn't mattered what was playing, as long as it had some of the natural rise and fall of other people speaking. He had been severely mising that lately, those gentle rhythms of conversation, and trying to listen to an audiobook while staring at his bedroom's popcorn ceiling just wasn't cutting it. So, TV dreaming it was.

Oh, that could be what was going on. An elaborate dream, constructed from the sound of a scenario he hadn't paid any attention to. He didn't think he'd fallen asleep watching anything to spark this kind of dreamscape, but that didn't mean much. It'd be oddly lucid, for a dream. And oddly sharp. His dreams, much like his memories, were always somewhat clouded over, and never as colorful as reality. Even his grayest waking days, of which there were many, had colors more distinct than what appeared in his mind's eye.

Simple test: he could never read or write in dreams. The words always swirled and distorted, and he somehow lost all manual dexterity. He needed a book, or a pencil, or both. He began to wander the ballroom, and abruptly realized that this was a masquerade, everyone wearing elaborate costumes with animal shaped masks. Did he fit in? Did he belong? He hoped he wasn't in what he fell asleep in, the worn hoodie and sweatpants barely worth making a grocery run in. The outside world wasn't supposed to see him looking comfortable, but presentable. He liked to think that if he left the apartment appearing at least somewhat put together, maybe people would believe that extended to other areas of his life. That it would be easier to ignore the increasingly dark circles under his eyes, that his nice sweater had been getting gradually looser as the tool of everything literally wore him down.

Small mercy, he wasn't like that now. A glance down showed that he was, like the rest of the guests? Captors? dressed to the nines. He has a suspicion that his own elaborate outfit, dark blues with gold and pearl embroidery, was a part of it. It was not a mercy to blend in here, it was a design element. Standing out would result in being noticed, being noticed meant being seen as an individual, and they can't have that.

It is with that line of thinking that he suddenly becomes aware of the weight of the mask on his face, the restriction of his sight through eyeholes. Looking into a teapot that's been polished to a mirrored shine, he see that he bears the incredibly crafted face of a field mouse. It would almost be plain, if it didn't have matching embroidery to his coat.

Fitting, he thought. It made him look smaller than he was, and he had so often wished to go unnoticed. A fly would've also worked, but he imagines it would be rather hard to make that into a suitably beautiful mask. Either way, he was level with the rest of the crowd. Even believing it to be part of the trick, even knowing that the masquerade was meant to make you false, there was some level of comfort to it. He was not going to be seen here. Instead someone more handsome, more charming, more even with his peers was allowed to take his place, as false as they were. Best of all, that's what all of them would be doing here, the whole appeal of a masquerade in leaving behind the person you loathe most and can never be free from.

Seems lonesome, for a party. So structured around the theater of it all. You can connect with countless people, and you don't get to actually connect with any of them at all.

Oh.

Oh, now this made all made sense. Crave interaction, and get a warped version of it.

He could see the napkins, emblazoned with a name that he didn't recognize, presumably the host, and, in much smaller font, the company name. Every one of them was consistent.

Easy enough to receive the message. This wasn't a dream. This was a punishment.

Hmm. Well, no, punishment might be the wrong term. Punishment implied that it was a consequence, a direct cause and effect of doing something wrong, by someone's definitions of "wrong". No this was. Torture is too strong of a word, and again, has the problem of making this seem willful. Deliberate. And maybe it was, but more likely, whatever this was had just sort of happened. A cruelty that comes with being in the universe they all happen to occupy.

This wasn't a dream. This was a consequence.

He doesn't know how to get out of here. He can't see any doors, and exits. The only approximation of one is some giant frosted glass that seem like they might lead to a balcony. They're only on the other end of the ballroom, but that lengths feels impenetrable, like it spans for miles and miles of harsh terrain.

There's a few options available to him.

One: Try to fall asleep, and see if he can get back to where he started. Lowest effort option, but he's pretty sure he hasn't been this fully awake in months. Maybe years. Something about the environment makes it feel as though electricity sparks throughout his entire body. It's an interesting sensation, certainly, akin to anxiety taken to an extreme degree, yet it's not particularly conducive to sleeping.

Two: Make a break for it. He doesn't know if there's anywhere to make a break for, but he also isn't sure how high up this place is. Maybe the balcony is a viable option for escape. Or maybe he'll find a door that had previously been hidden from him. Hell, maybe he won't fully escape, but he'll find somewhere quieter at the very least. Somewhere that he doesn't leave him so thoroughly dazed. This is probably the best option, even account for the wall of people surrounding him. But.

Option Three: Join the Dance.

Inadvisable. Foolish, really. The best outcome is..what? Is there a best outcome? Worst outcome is he's dancing forever, until his feet wear down to stubs of bone, until he dies, until he cant remember anything but the dance. Never a connection with any dancer, all of them, eventually, a blur of activity and nothing more.

Yet, it's what he's going to do. He's not the most curious person he knows, that honor goes to a man that he's been in love with for years, but can't grasp any of the details of while he's here. That can't be good. What was his name?

Anyway. He's not the most curious, but he's hardly immune to a detrimental sense of interest. He wants to know what the dance is like. He wants to see the intricate costumes of the others stuck here, and see if there's anything behind the masks. He knows it will, inevitably, leave him lonelier. He knows, inevitably, that he does not care. At least this version of loneliness is more interesting than sitting in his flat, wondering whether having thin enough walls to hear the echo of his neighbors' voices would make things better or worse. So, when someone approaches, adorned in a shrew mask, hand outstretched to pull him into the fervor, he accepts.

The dancer is competent. Neither of them steps on the others foot, and he lets himself be led. Even better, the dancer is willing to talk. A man named Tom, his voice cheerful even as he confirms that he doesn't know how he came here either. Tom shrugs when he asks if this bothers him, saying if you're going to end up somewhere mysteriously, gliding across a ballroom with a handsome stranger is hardly the worst place to be.

It takes a second for him to register the fact that Tom's flirting. It makes him laugh, and it feels wrong in his throat. The sound is unfamiliar, almost belonging to someone else, but it's brief enough not to hurt. He'll grieve all the time he's lost later, for now, he says, "How would you know if I'm handsome with this mask? Or are you just making a flattering guess?"

Tom opens his mouth to answer, a grin on his features that suggest something playful and wry is about to come out, but then the song ends. They both know, somehow, that the brief rapport they've gotten to enjoy has come to an end. They swap partners, and as much has he would like a second dance, when Tom gets swept into the throng, he knows he won't be seeing him again.

The next dancer is at a higher skill level at him, which results in nerves encroaching on what limited ability he has. Perhaps the peacock mask should've been a tip off. He doesn't speak to them, more focused on trying to keep up. He doesn't regret that they'll only have one dance, but he is slightly remiss that his own costume doesn't have feathers after watching the way they move.

The dancer after that catches him for a slow dance. Her name is Shelia, and he's never seen such a dazzling smile. He tells her as such, and she tells him that she would tell him the same, but she hasn't actually seen his own, yet. He makes an attempt, and she tells him, "Oh honey, you're waiting for someone here, aren't you?"

When he states his confusion, that nobody comes to mind, or at least, that nobody is going to come, she shakes her head. Apparently, she can always tell when her dance partners have somewhere else to be, and she doesn't resent it, but it does mean she's not going to give him her number for after the night ends. He's amazed she believes this night will end, but it's a sentiment that seems far too rude to voice out loud.

He also knows that he doesn't have somewhere else to be. If he did, he would've never joined in.

The music continues, and so does he. He tries to get names, tries to get connections. He flirts with Mark, and Nadia, and Jamie. Those people are his favorite during the dances, but losing the also feels the most acute. Robert is his least favorite, even more so than the peacock, for how incredibly small the fox makes him feel. Nothing is even said, it's just the entirety of body language screams that Robert doesn't think he belongs here, that he's not worthy of the clothes he's wearing or the hall he's haunting. Ironically, he's right. He doesn't belong here. These clothes, these people, are not his. Only Robert is quite so skilled at making that seem like a bad thing.

About ten dances in, long past the point he should be winded, he realizes two things. One, there's no pain in his feet, no heaviness to his breathing, confirming once again that no aspect of this environment is natural. Two, is that he's actually had a path. Sometime in the spins and leads and follows, he had been making his way towards the center of the floor. He denies the next partner, likely the worst of a faux paus in this environment, but he needs a moment to stop. Taking in the scene, he has yet to find the source of the music, but he has found the host of this party.

There's nothing to physically show that he's the host. His costume isn't particularly ostentatious, at least not compared to the rest of them. He's not surrounded by a horde of people clamoring for his attention. He doesn't glow or sparkle or have a spotlight on him. The only reveal of his status is the fact that the second he looks at the man in the owl mask, fear floods through him.

Now he needs to run. He needs to leave, he needs to get out, he can't let the man in the owl mask see him, let alone approach him. Pushing his way through the crowd is a bad idea, will bring too much attention to himself. However, he's not in a state to think about that sort of thing, panic gripping his actions. As he shoves his way past one person, he swears ten more people tke their place, and he, oh so close to despair, is unable to tell if there's any actual distance being put between him and the owl masked man.

As he's about to start biting, clawing, screaming his way out any way he can, he hears something that makes him stop.

"Let him go, or I will make you let him go."

The statement is cold, filled with vitrol and determination. It should only make him more afraid. But as he turns around, he sees someone he never expected to be here, someone who has come here anyway. In an all black outfit, the man's face is covered with that of a cat's, but he has not a single ounce of doubt as to who it is. And he's facing off against the owl man, the absolute fool. He's facing off against the owl man, and Martin knows that it's on his own account. What the hell? He can't...he doesn't know what's going to happen to him, what exactly the owl man is going to do, but he can't let Jon get hurt. Begging his voice to pierce through the pandemonium of people and noise, he calls out, "JON!"

Jon finds him in an instant, eyes locking. They only have a second before the crowd pushes in, before the owl man reaches out, wing-like cape ready to wrap Jon up and snatch him away. Jon simply calls out, "Balcony!" before he's once again out of sight. Martin wants to go towards him, wants to follow the instinct to try and protect the one he loves, but going forward is impossible.

The tempo and volume of the music has swollen, and he's surrounded by hands reaching out, trying to pull him in. One of those hands, much to his surprise, belongs to Tom. He stares, uncomprehendingly, and Tom shoves his hand out even further in an act of urgency. He has to participate to make progress.

He holds on tight, all the basic skill of their first dance lost. It doesn't matter, as long as Martin participates, he is rewarded. When the next song begins to play, Tom strengthens his grip, and they manage to prevent the switch. In a manner of minutes, or perhaps hours, they make their way to the edge of the crowd. Martin can see those beautiful frosted doors only about 10 meters away, mostly unobstructed, and releases Tom from their dance. "Thank you. I seriously didn't think..just, thank you."

Tom gives him a nod, his expression much more solemn than it had been during their initial meeting. "After our first dance, I remembered my kids. A daughter and son. If they're out there, wherever out there is, I need to get back to them. If you can get yourself out, maybe there's hope for the rest of us, yeah? I think you might be a tipping point."

Martin had no idea if that was true. Sounded a bit too..center of the story for him. The hero, the chosen one, he was never going to fufill those roles. But. But he doesn't know what a denial would serve, and if he can go through those doors, who knows? "Yeah...yeah, maybe. I'll certainly try."

Tom clasps one of Martin's hands between both of his own, and with a quick shake, tells him, "That's all I ask."

In a blink, Tom has once again been swallowed by the fray, and Martin strides to his goal. He catches glimpses of the owl man out of the corner of his eye. Despite the sight making his heart race, the owl man never makes it to him, almost as if the dancers had forcibly blocked his path. Fascinating, isn't it, how a crowd can turn against someone in a matter of moments. Fascinating, isn't it, how a crowd can decide to help someone in the same span of time.

As Martin stands in front of the exit to the balcony, he has to take a breath. This could be a trick. A trap. A cruelty. If it is, he'll deal with it. If not, well.

Well.

The doors are heavy, but he's still able to push them aside. The sight outside is incredible. The stars are dazzling, brilliant, and numerous, resembling themilky way that Martin has only ever seen in pictures.

It's wrong. It's obviously wrong. Martin's never been anywhere remote enough to escape the effects of light pollution, and he's pretty sure a brightly lit manor isn't the exception to that rule. Yet, that's not what's bothering him about it. He can't quite articulate why, but the sky in general should be..different. Worse, maybe. Greener?

Jon is staring up into the night sky with a fascination that confirms Martin's suspicion. After he takes a step towards him, Jon turns towards him, and a smile appears that knocks the breath right out of Martin. When has Jon ever smiled at him like that? It doesn't make sense, feels like another trick of the party, but Martin decides he doesn't care, he'll enjoy it while it lasts. "I have to say, this is definitely one of the nicer looking domains we've wandered through. Always a plus when we end up somewhere without any bloodstains."

That's not... "Huh?"

With an aftertaste of a laugh and a shrug of his shoulders, Jon tells him, "Just that, for as much as I despise the loneliness, it does at least have cleanliness going for it."

He knows of the fears, at least, but the way that Jon is talking about them doesn't make sense. He's going to ask about it, try to get some clarification, but then Jon takes off his mask. There's more grey at the temples than he remembers, more eyes than the average person, and he's stunningly beautiful. Martin's always found Jon rather good looking, even when he didn't particularly like Jon himself (god, what a fool he was. Maybe what a fool they both were). Combined with the softness in the line of his mouth, the adoration in his eyes, it leaves Martin breathless, speechless, thoughtless. Feet moving of their own accord, he drifts closer to Jon. Once he's standing in front of him, Jon reaches up, then pauses, as if asking for permission. Half in a daze, Martin nods, then leans down. Ever so gently, Jon lifts Martin's mask off. The pinpoints of contact between his face and Jon's fingers almost burn, and he realizes that despite the electrified sensation under his skin, he's been cold this entire time. Mask fully off, Jon beams at him, and lets out a quiet, "There you are."

It's too much. It's the tipping point for him to go from enamoured back to properly baffled. "Jon, I don't..what are you doing here?"

Jon smile drops, and Martin almost wants to take it back. Almost, because he needs answers, because if this is a dream, if this is a nightmare, it's more wicked than he could've ever expected. Being stuck forever in a dance with only partners whose greatest talents were being alone in a crowd is one thing, but having a..a false Jon, one that regarded him with...that acted like...that felt anything close to the same as Martin was so..exacting. When it got taken away, when the illusion shattered, it would hurt. It's already hurting, anticipation of the wound causing a phantom pain. Jon's brows are furrowed, and at least that is familiar, expected. "I..thought you would want to leave. I came to get you out."

"I do," did he?, "but that still..that's not the why? Why would you come for me?"

"Because I love you? I know I'm not much for the swashbuckling hero role, bit I figured that would make me rather uniquely qualified."

Martin sucks in a breath through his nose and his eyes go wide. Ability to read be damned, this is a dream, and mean one at that. He's going to wake up, and he's going to remember, and he's going to be as alone as he's always been. "Since when? You're not..I think we've just started being friends, and it's not even, fuck, we're not even that close! And even if..if things were in development, which they aren't, you're supposed to be in America right now. Or, no, wait you're in a coma, or maybe..no, that's not-"

Martin's spiralling is abruptly cut off by Jon taking his hands. Looking at his face, he finds Jon staring back, his eyes, his two eyes, are searching him, and Martin realizes he might not be the only one that's lost right now. "Martin...what's the last thing you remember?"

A mostly empty flat, the delightful mix of insomnia and exhaustion, and the TV with the volume turned down low enough to not bother anyone but himself. The context around that scene is a bit fuzzier. "I..was at my place. It was..I dunno, it was boring."

"Anything else. Do you remember Jane Prentiss?"

"Of course I remember Jane Prentiss. Not likely to ever forget the worst two weeks of my life."

"What about Scotland?"

Scotland? "I'm mean, I've never been, but I, uh, am aware of the concept."

Except that wasn't quite true, was it? He had been to Scotland, and Jon had been there, but when? Why? What had they..

Jon's frown deepens. "Martin, do you trust me?"

He did. Despite everything, or maybe because of an everything he couldn't quite access, he really, really did. His response of "Yes" is more of a breath than a word, but Jon understands nonetheless. Jon reaches up, places his hands on the sides of Martin's face, and tells him, "Close your eyes."

Martin does as told, and Jon brings their foreheads together, an approximation of a kiss. There's a buzzing at the base of his skull, not painful, but not particularly pleasant, either. As Jon leans back and he opens his eyes, the sky is wrong, but it is the wrong that he has become increasingly accustomed to.

He remembers.

Jon hasn't fully released him yet, asking still ever so gently, "Back with me?"

Martin nods, and Jon drops his hands. Immediately, Martin grabs one of them with his own, because while it may be the apocalypse, at least he can do that as freely as he likes. "Yeah, yeah, I'm good, " he looks down, and sighs, "Eugh. Do miss the clean clothes though."

Jon gives a hint of a smile, and as he begins to move forward. "Now you understand my point about the lonely having a tidiness to it."

"If it's all the same to you, I think I'll take grime over memory loss any day."

"Next domain is a corruption one, so we'll see how much that holds true."

"Of course it is."

They walk in silence for a few moments until Martin gives Jon's hand a quick squeeze. "Hey Jon?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you for getting me out."

Jon replies, "Of course," as an easy statement of fact, and Martin believes it. He has to add, "And I love you too."

The responding smile he gets from Jon makes him think he might be one of the few people in existence to feel lucky after the end of the world.

[iwhishtomeetinournextlife]

An anonymous love (Part 1)

Summary : Y/N sees Sirius Black running away after a particulary rough letter from his mother. She wants to cheer him up and decide to send him a letter, anymously, she knows how much he hates her house.

Warnings : Slytherin!Reader, female!reader, reader is worried about Sirius, not proof read

Word count : 1.8k

English is not my first language, sorry if there is any mistakes

You're here - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7

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Y/N loved receiving letters but even more sending them, she loved including all sorts of little gifts in hers; flowers, drawings, photographs, candies sometimes, she loved it even more now she was a witch,  she started doing experiments with her magic. She learned how to make the drawings moves, charms the flowers so they would reopen as fresh as new, she even found a way for the letter to be read out loud if desire, in a way were it doesn’t fold and destroy itself the ways howlers do, so it could be listen to over and over again, her family especially loved that one.

She wanted to see now if could even include kisses, or even hugs, the feeling of arm wrapping around you to squeeze you tight was one of the best feeling to her and she wanted to be able to send it to anyone, so they could feel it whenever they wanted.

She was able to put the hugs and the kisses on little cards who had to be unfold, it took many mistake, accidents and retry but she was able to do it after some times. It wasn’t as reusable has she had hoped, only three uses who doesn’t last more than five seconds, but she was confident enough to know she will do better in the future.

She had send her last version to her parents a few days ago, one she was the proudest of, and was now waiting for their respond. Making sure everything was perfect was important as the first time she tried to do it the message felt like a dagger stabbing her chest. Thankfully she had no injuries, Mrs Pomfrey assured her there were nothing, the pain stayed a few hours though and she could have kissed the nurse for excusing her from the morning class that day, she would have not been able to work anyway.

Y/N was now waiting at the slytherin table next to the few friends she was able to make among her own house, quietly eating while listening to the crazy story of the friend on her right, laughing joyfully. She turned her head when she saw the owls starting to enter the room, eager to find if she will receives the respond of her parents, she watch as the other student opened their own mail, including the raven-haired boy at the gryffindor table, Sirius Black.

He had catch the eye of Y/N like many others, girls and boys, but she never dared to make a move, she was a slytherin and she knew how much he hated them. She had thought many times to send him an anonymous later but what for ? It would be a lost cost and she rather let the feeling die rather than being hurt. Well, at least she thought her feelings would disappear as time went by but she was incredibly wrong, it only got more intense.

Being in most of his classes was of no help, his cocky behavior, his stunning looks and charming smile. What bugged her the most was how brilliant he was, she never saw him study or even really paid good attention in class but was somehow able to earn good marks. She was a bit jealous of him for that if she was honest with herself, she wasn’t a bad student per say but did have to be focused and study to have good grades. They talked a few times before, mostly him helping her out with classes but he was nothing but nice and patient with her despote the green of her tie.

She fell for him even more when she saw him helping first years travelling the corridors and defending a third year against her bully, the punch was perfectly aimed for Merlin’s sake ! She loved every story he told her, all the pranks, the aventures, the quidditch match. The more she learned about him, the more difficult it was for her to keep her eye away from him.

“You’re drooling again”, Jacob snapped her out of her mind “ ‘m not !” swipping her lips just to be sure, making her friends laugh, she was red of embarassment, so out she hadn’t notice the owl giving her her parent’s letter. She gratefully took it before giving a bit of food to the owl who then flied away. Y/N got interrupt has she was opening the enveloppe.

“C’mon, you cant’ keep looking at him from afar for the rest of school ! Talk to him for once and save us the lover eyes !” said Olivia, “I can’t, you know he hates slytherins” her friend opened her mouth to protest before being cut. “Plus, he is way out of my league, he is like-" Y/N hesited a bit on her words, waving her hand around “- a sun giving life around him and I’m just somekind of, I don’t know, insect in the dirt”. Her friends around all gave a chorus of long sighs, they heard that a million times before, she rolled her eyes “My point is, I will never have the courage to ask him out”.

Before anyone could talk, a loud sound was heard comming from the gryffindor table, followed by the sound of turn up paper. When Y/N looked, she frowned, seeing Sirius almost running out of the room. “Wait mate !” James Potter, his best friend, tried to follow him but Remus Lupin stopped him. Y/N didn’t quite catch what they were saying, something about him needing to be alone.

And alone he stayed, she didn’t see him for the rest of the day, and she learned during the dinner that night it was because of the letter he received from home, it was quite known by most of the people who cared enough to be aware of the disastrous relationship of Sirius and his family, as it wasn’t unusual to see the boy upset because of his mother. Y/N’s blood boiled every time it would happened, how could someone treat their child that way ? Taking their time to write every horrid words just to cause pain ? Using something she loved so much to cause trouble instead as it should be : for the one you loved.

The scene earlier that day worked her up so much, she put her parent’s latter away without reading it, and it is only now in her bed she remembered even having it. She smiled at the curved letters, it was her mother’s handwritting, she very enthousiatly explain how her and her dad loved the hug, that coupled with the speaking spell “It was like you were right here with us !”, well not quite as she precised right after, but it felt nice to feel and hear their daughter after so many weeks apparts. She laughted when her father this time wrote she should find a way to commercial it, as she will become the richest witch of the wizard world. “Sure thing dad” she thought to herself. She carefully fold the paper before putting it in her “letter box”.

Then when she laid down, she couldn’t stop feeling sad for Sirius, he had such terrible parents but deserved so much more. She turned and turned and turned around in her bed, searching for a way to cheer him up and then she stopped, thinking of the letter of her parents and the success of the hug in the message, perhaps, she could send him something ..? She blushed at the idea, what could she says ? “Hey, your parents suck but your butty could send me in outter space”, sure, yeah, what a great idea Y/N.

She sighed, fine, maybe not that harsh but she could try to remind him how much is he loved here and how much of a great person he is. So she sat down in her bed, took a piece of parchment, her ink and her quill, careful to not wake up her roomates as she closed her curtains. She blow air through her mouth for a minute, gathering some courage, and then she start to write, hoping he would like it.

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The next day when she woke up, or more like when it was time to get ready since she didn’t close her eye all night, wanting the message to be perfect : the drawing, an illustration of a dog, a stag, a rat and the moon, remembering the nickname and the jokes the marauders gave and made to eachothers, she charmed it for the little animals to run around the paper, leaving paws or hooves print behind –which disappear after a few step of course-, the curves of the words, the ink, she had opt for her favorite dark purple, the flowers had she picked, some wind-flower and cyclamen, that she carefully stuck to the parchment.

And of course the final touch : a kiss on the forhead. She had thought of a hug but decided it was too much, it could be scary to suddenly feels arms around you. A smol kiss was more appropriate, a bit bold yeah, but more fleeting, less intimidating and still a tender gesture.

When she was happy with the result and check any error in her words she put the message in an envelopt, decorated with stars, showing the cannis constellation, because of Sirius name obviously. And then put it in her bag, careful so her friend would not see it.

Once she was ready and out of her room with her friends, she realised she had no idea on how to give it to him. Surely not by hand, she didn’t put her name anywhere for a reason, maybe slide it into his bag during class ? But she was to scared to be caught.

She didn’t have to worry about it to much, since Sirius wasn’t at the class she shared with him, his friends looked troubled and worried, calmer than usual. Y/N felt a weight setting in her stomach, was the letter that bad he didn’t want to show up today either ? When he wasn’t at lunch either, she decided to send him by owl.

She excused herself from her friend, saying she had to send a letter, it wasn’t unusual for her to do so, so they didn’t even flinch. Once at the owl aviary and once she gave it to an owl and walked away, trying not to think to much, she stop. What if the letter only made him more upset ? Of course nothing she wrote was mean, but what if he didn’t like at all the idea of some unknown person looking in his private life ? Feeling arrogant enough to think they could cheer him up when his friends, those whom he consider family, weren’t able to do it ? Y/N turned around to take the letter back but it was too late, the bird had fly away, and since he was at hogwarts, he will have it in a few minutes only.

She felt the weight in her stomach get heavier, she hoped so much it will not make things worse.

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Hoped you liked my first fic ! I don't know when the second part will be posted but I'll do my best for it to be soon.

Have a nice day ! Love you <3