#ann is coming for yt's life

[inquisitive-june]

Separatist Swaps: Home Cook Youtubers

This week’s theme from @radblrthemeweeks is  Separatist Swaps (suggesting equivalent female artists/musicians/creators/etc to support as well as or instead of men)

I’ll admit I don’t read or watch TV much, but I do watch a lot of YouTube.  I added some of my favorite channels to this post in the past (X).  This will be an expanded list in no particular order.

Initially, I wanted to compare each channel to a similar male-led one, but I opted to just summarize what I think is unique about each one.

Food and Cooking

Note: I prefer vegan/plant based cooking, so I’ll specify which of these channels are exclusively vegan.

Cheap Lazy Vegan (V) Rose makes a lot of Korean food, but the ingredients are pretty easy to find at a regular grocery store.  Many of her videos feature high protein, nutritious meals that can be ready in 20 minutes or less.  I’ve also found her recipes to be shockingly simple without getting boring.

Rainbow Plant Life (V) Nisha is one of my favorite youtubers.  Her recipes are a bit more involved that Rose’s, but I’ve made several of them myself so they’re still approachable for a home cook.  Her recipes are primarily American or Indian inspired with advice for meal prep and saving time.

Pick Up Limes (V)  Sadia is a nutritionist, so her recipes tend to be wholesome and nutritious.  However, she still has a lot of recipes for comfort food and desserts.  I don’t make her recipes as often, but her videos are enjoyable.

Sierra Ann  I like her easy “recipes” (more like meal ideas), but she sometimes posts about fashion as well.  Her content is more akin to a vlog than concrete recipes or cooking tips, so I find myself watching her YT shorts more than her longform content.

Lisa Nguyen  I’ve only ever seen her YT shorts so idk if she makes longer videos or not.  She does instant ramen challenges where she tries different brands or ramen hacks.

Morgan Drinks Coffee  Morgan releases a mix of recipes and other content like appliance and coffee reviews.  She has a lot of advice for people just getting into coffee or those who want some fresh ideas.

Inga Lam  When I made the other post she was still working for Buzzfeed, but she recently decided to focus on her own channel.  I’m not sure what she has planned but she’s very creative and ambitious.

How to Cook That  Ann Reardon mostly makes baking videos, but I prefer her debunking videos.  She seems to have shifted more toward debunking dangerous videos in general, not just food related videos.

June Xie from Delish  June makes long videos creating a week’s worth of meals, often on a budget.  My main complaint about her content is that some of the food she makes is either not for everybody or uses ingredients that aren’t readily accessible, like produce from specialty shops.  However, that also means her recipes tend to be unique and interesting.  Her boyfriend also comes off as kinda rude, but he’s only there when they’re tasting the food.

Beryl Shereshewsky  People from around the world submit ways they eat a particular food, like instant ramen or onions, and Beryl makes and reviews them.  These videos are helpful when I feel stuck in a routine and want to see ingredients from a different perspective.

Alix Traeger  Alix used to work for Tasty, but now she makes content on her own channel with her girlfriend Zoya.  Zoya is Persian, so it’s been fun watching Alix try to master Persian dishes.

Here are some others I saw in my Watch Later list that I don’t watch often or haven’t seen yet.

Mina Rome (Cooking)

Doobydobap (Cooking)

Flo Lum (Cooking)

Sarah’s Vegan Kitchen (Cooking)

Sweet Simple Vegan (Cooking)

Julia Pacheco (Cooking)

Feelgoodfoodie (Cooking)

Anne of all trades (DIY)

The busy brown angel (Gardening)

Gardening and Homesteading

Girl in the Woods  I just found her channel last week, but it was too interesting to leave out.  Usually I don’t like homesteading YouTubers because they focus on the aesthetics, but I’ve actually learned a lot about off-grid living just from watching a few of her videos.

HannahLeeDuggan  She bought a property with a run-down cabin a few years back.  Before that, she was living in a van and selling handmade clothes online.  I can’t say I’ve learned much about van life or homesteading from her videos, but I haven’t given her a fair chance yet.  Last I checked, she was planning on documenting the process of fixing up and weather-proofing her cabin.

Learn Something

Answers in Progress  This channel is run by three people, two of which are women.  They answer random questions with a surprising amount of research and interviews with professionals.

The Take The Take claims to be “ the leading female-led entertainment analysis channel on TV, Movies & Pop-Culture”

Cheyenne Lin  Cheyenne focuses on feminist analysis and film analysis through a feminist lens.

Jessica Chou  She isn’t active anymore but she has some basic videos on car maintenance.

Micarah Tewers Micarah sews a combination of beautiful and insane clothes.  I’ve never tried to recreate any of her patterns but she’s so entertaining to watch.  She made fake eyelashes out of her dog’s hair and that’s not even the craziest thing she’s done on her channel.

Since this is intended to be a discussion, I’m also including a list of channels I’d like to find that are usually male dominated.

Game News and Lore I like watching lore videos for games like the Fallout series, RDR2, and TES.  So far, the only female gamers I’ve seen on YT are overly sexualized and don’t make the content I’m looking for.

Food Science There are a few channels that break down food science like Adam Ragusea and Kenji Lopez-Alt.  The closest female equivalent is How to Cook That, but it’s not quite what I’m looking for and she primarily posts baking videos.

I’ve been watching a lot of Ethan Chlebowski’s videos lately because he makes meal formulas and focuses on high protein meals.  If anyone knows who I’m talking about, I’d love to see female-run channels that make similar content.

Gardening and Homesteading  I want channels that actually teach me something new and don’t focus on pseudoscience or religion.

[nalyra-dreaming]

I was watching a YT video breaking down the trailer and the person mentioned that before the show, the online fandom was quite small. Is that true? And if so, what has it been like seeing it explode? The first fandom I ever got into was for a little Australian period detective show and it was so nice. It was very small and there was literally zero drama. I would imagine it would be annoying as hell to be in a nice little “coven” (if you will) enjoying all the many and varied canonical relationships within the series only for the show to open it up to people with zero media literacy screaming their fav ship is the only one true ship and this vampire character is a bad person while this other vampire is baby boi.

Well, to be frank, I wasn't "in" the VC fandom before the show, though I heard that while enduring it wasn't too big.

I had been, kinda, once upon a time. I had been around before Anne's wrath came down. (She literally had fanfictions removed, sites closed down, threatened to sue, etc etc). That was... back then. I used to be in forums, and mailing list before that. I still have fanfiction of 20 years back printed out.

Her coming down hard on the fandom threw me back, so to speak, and also reading the end of "Memnoch the Devil", which, at the time was meant to be the end to it all... broke my heart.

I stepped back from it then, for a while. You know, real life, playing WoW, studying, starting to work^^. Had a daughter :)

The love for it stayed though, I kept all my stuff.

When I heard about the show I wasn't overly impressed by the head shots (lol, I stand corrected, but I mean given Rolin's comments in the podcast at least I'm in good company^^), nor the shifts in the story that were published - because who could anticipated it being THIS?! :))))

And so I tuned in for Jacob Anderson, who I'd loved in GoT. And I was actually sold after the SDCC 2022 trailer. That trailer... hit it.

I cannot describe it.

And yes, from what I saw the fandom then exploded.

The changes to the narrative in the show however split what had already been there and what was coming in up a bit, let's put it that way. For ME this is an ingenious adaptation. They "get" it, imho. They focus on the important bits, and they dare. Just... brilliant.

For some the changes were reason to withdraw though.

It is a bit... annoying to see all the "ship wars" in this content, yes. But I get it, I've spoken about it the other day. I don't think "we" (as in most of the audience) are used to a show like this.

We are not used (anymore) to be challenged as much while watching, we are not used to a show daring to put its fingers into wounds like that. We are not used to a show going full mess wrt relationships.

We are not used to a show that dares, and does so on a level I have seldom seen.

I call this show the "show of the decade" and I stand by that. In quality and approach it is and will be.

But yeah... moralizing these characters... will fail *laughs*

They're all terrible. Killers, murderers.

I currently see none of the drama (if there is any?!), my timeline is utterly peaceful, and I do want it to stay that way. I've had my say on that. That subset can keep it.

I'm here for the brilliant mess that will be the upcoming seasons :)))

[houseofbrat]

Yup. I remember psychic tarot card reader had also predicted that Andrew might come close to taking his own life. Wish she would come back on YT. So much has happened since she left.

Andrew is incredibly arrogant & selfish. He'll destroy his own family's reputation for his own mistakes, and I’m referring to his daughters' lives, not Charles, Anne, or William.

Not surprising that he would attempt to take his own life instead of dealing with the consequences of his mistakes openly and honestly. 

[11hearstrings]

fujoshi moment like what does it mean that Louis could be so direct about his desires, so free of shame with armand and even w the other guy who did him some face, but never w lestat??

clearly lestat saw Louis as being emasculated and disempowered and wanted to give him that power back but he never lives up to it by lestat’s standards right. So isn’t it fascinating that w armand he is so direct - even though Armand is the one giving him what he has and once again replicating the dynamic of guiding him through his vampirity. don’t get me started on the implications that has for their present day Dynamic.

But going back to my previous point maybe his boldness comes from the fact that he’s in the coven and not isolated?? And that Lestat isn’t the master of him anymore (but lestat will always be there!!! his maker his shadow his true love his torturer) or perhaps he’s more easily able to hide and feels more safe to be seen by Armand. To let himself see Armand too? But ofc he’s not really sure about being seen bc if Armand sees him then all he’ll see is lestat.

But maybe there’s comfort in being with someone so powerful they understand lestats hold on him and the things that he allowed to happen to him (the things that he FEELS he allowed to happen to him. The shame). And so the loustat dynamic replicates again - from the abuse of the racist yts to empowerment through love to the abuse from lestat to the empowerment of Love from Armand. FUCK this shit is on different levels Anne rice I’m never reading those books but I owe you my fucking life

[onenettvchannel]

NEW OVERNIGHT: 'The Casagrandes Movie' premiered to stream on Netflix, promising heartwarming adventure and unforgettable moments [#OneNETnewsEXCLUSIVE]

LAREDO, TEXAS -- 'The Casagrandes Movie' officially premiered in the early morning hours on the popular American streaming platform Netflix worldwide, including Mexico and the Philippines as OneNETnews gives an exclusive overnight scoop. The highly anticipated animated streaming cartoon film was released at exactly 3am (Eastern in the U.S.), as initially reported by the esteemed entertainment news and movie reviewer outlet 'The Feast of Legends'.

According to film enthusiast news writer 'Tarushi Patali', the Casagrandes Movie received glowing reviews (excluding 'Cartoonshi' alone, a male british YouTuber), with critics praising its heartwarming storyline, diverse characters and breathtaking animation. The film follows the beloved Casagrande family, along with a birthday daughter 'Ronnie Anne Santiago' and most of her friends like 'Sidney Chang' and 'Lincoln Loud' (which isn't included the said streaming film) as they embark on a whirlwind adventure filled with laughter, love and life lessons in Michoacan, Mexico.

In an interview with Animation World Network (AWN) as animated film director named 'Mr. Miguel Angel Puga' shared his excitement for the now-released streaming movie. He also highlighted the exceptional skills of a disclosed freelance Mexico's animators who were collaborated on the project. Mr. Puga expressed his thankfulness for the opportunity to bring the Casagrandes' story to the big screen, and is eager for audiences to witness it to yourself.

The streaming film promises to be a heartwarming and entertaining experience for streaming viewers of all ages, including adults (excluding parents). Packed with humor, adventure and unforgettable moments as the official news website via Netflix's Tudum, fans of 'The Loud House' to immerse themselves in a colorful world of the Casagrande family.

The animation and entertainment industries, per se the production at Nickelodeon Movies and Nickelodeon Animation Studios (NAS) are excited by this said now-release of the animated streaming film as mentioned earlier above. The Casagrande Family's world premiere on Netflix is a significant milestone for their loyal streaming fans who have been eagerly anticipating this cinematic experience at home or on the go.

With its universal themes of family, friendship and cultural pride in the Mexican-American culture, 'The Casagrandes Movie' may positioning to leave an indelible mark on audiences across the entire world. Whether viewers have tuned to watch cartoon movies legally in the United States of America (U.S.A.), Mexico, the Philippines, Central Visayas, Negros Island Region (NIR) or beyond, this masterpiece in the animated film is certain to enthrall and inspire with its heartfelt storytelling and captivating life.

So grab your popcorn, snacks or both; gather your loved ones, and join the Casagrande family (from the spin-off behind 'The Loud House' TV series and a movie) on an unforgettable journey that will leave you smiling, laughing and inspired. Don't miss this must-watch streaming movie that is guaranteed to be a beloved classic for generations to come.

'The Casagrandes Movie' is now available for stream exclusively on Netflix, ready to delight audiences of all ages with its magic and charm.

SCREENGRAB PHOTO and LOGO COURTESY: Nickelodeon Animation Studios and Google Images

SOURCE: *https://thefeastoflegends.com/the-casagrandes-review/ [Referenced Movie Review Article via The Feast of Legends news bureau] *https://www.awn.com/animationworld/director-miguel-puga-talks-casagrandes-movie-and-mexicos-talented-animators [Referenced News Article via Animation World Network] *https://www.netflix.com/tudum/articles/the-casagrandes-movie-release-date-news [Referenced News Article via Netflix Tudum news bureau] and *https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZ7UfPQzRY4 [Referenced YT VIDEO via The AniNation Podcast]

-- OneNETnews Team

[tophee]

Persona 5 Royal Review/Rambling - Spoilers!

With Persona 4 Golden being my only experience with the SMT games, Persona 5 Royal is such a wonderful addition to the series. Oozing with style in the huds, menu screen animations, scene transitions and just about everywhere else, the game is such a treat for the eyes with nary a dull moment.

This is by no means meant to undermine the soundtrack, which is one of the best of any game I’ve ever played. I have like 4 songs from the game in my personal playlist, with Life Will Change being my fave track. If FF14′s taught me anything, it’s that nothing makes you feel more badass killing shit than with a killer song playing in the background.

That’s also one of my fave directions they took with the game. You and your posse are badasses. Seeing everyone’s poses and the transitions from 3D to 2D after All-Out attacks never get stale. And just when I thought the combat couldn’t get any cooler, it introduces Showtime attacks!

If I had to nitpick something, it’d be how the game kept sexualizing Ann. Her Phantom Thief outfit, her Showtime attacks, and in the animated scenes especially. Which is a shame, coz the game didn’t need to do it at all to keep my attention but I’m probably in the minority that’s annoyed by it. 

To summarize, I had a grand ol’ time and the game is now one of my top 3 favorites. (Might be top 1 even, but gonna have to think on it.)

Some other fun tidbits: • By sheer coincidence, I maxed out Takemi’s confidant rank first and selected choices that could have let me romanced her. (Read somewhere that there were requirements for this?) She was just so pretty that whenever she texted I couldn’t say no lol. • Also by sheer coincidence, the second confidant I maxed was Kawakami. Guess I subconsciously like older women.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯    • I romanced Haru in the end though. It was either her or Kasumi, but after finding out the latter had specific requirements (and already failing most of them), I went with the former. • I might just have a soft spot for girls calling me senpai coz I romanced Rise in P4G too lol. • I was least interested in Makoto for a while, but after reading some comments online and doing a little introspection, she’s become one of my faves. • I’ve never felt smarter than realizing right away that Akechi could hear Morgana. Felt real dumb too coz even after all that, I never suspected him. Figured it wasn’t a big deal or that he’d tell the gang or something. Me big dumb. • The game has made me want to play through P4G again, coz I never beat the actual final boss and see the true ending. Will probably do it soon. 

Also read that the harem route hurts like all hell? But I have no choice if I want to see every romance scene in one playthrough. :( • First ever game where I immediately want to play it again after finishing. Gonna do the harem route to see all the romance scenes. (And to finally date Kasumi!!)

I heard the girls you don’t go on a date with on Valentine’s all come and beat you up? Which is gonna suck, especially coz I plan to save scum to see how the date goes with every one. I refuse to watch it on YT. >:(

I’m glad I failed to max rank Maruki my first time playing too. I apparently missed a lot of content coz of it lmao. I’m following a 100% guide now so I’m not gonna miss anything. Can’t wait!

[ebonyslasher]

Slashers reaction to a person coming up and touching the reader hair without permission and askin if it’s theirs and the reader going off😌. Cause periodt as they should 💅🏾

I don't think I've ever had someone do that to me, thank goodness. Cause I would probably freeze and not know what my body does next cause it'll def be moving on its own lmao

Slashers react to rude bitches touching readers hair w/o permission:

Hand in hand, You two were taking a stroll around the local park. There had been some new improvements to the area you’d heard about. The city committee finally approved changing the flora landscape, as well as new benches, fountains, and an added kids playground. Random comments from either of you were thrown out as you walked, eventually stopping in front of a particular statue that you were dying to see. Ahead of you was a bronze statue of Rosa Parks, standing tall and proud. It brought a smile to your face.

While you two were admiring the statue, you heard the soft crinkle of your afro before you felt hands invading the side of your hair. The smile on your face went away as you stood, stunned, and fixed your eyes on the person who stood beside you. There was a cream colored hand destroying the shape of your afro - which took you at least 30 minutes to get a perfect shape.

"Oh my gosh, your hair is so soft! It's just like my cat's! Is it real?"

The boldness of this bitch. Your arm moved before you even thought about it, shoving the yt girls arm away from your perfect hair.

"Don't touch my hair, Raggedy Anne!"

Candyman was livid. He wanted to yank her ass away from you and end her life. But, it would be dangerous for him to do that out on the open with you around. He knows the police would jump his butt the second they get there.

The yt woman had the audacity to look offended. Before you could go in on her, Candyman led you away to go elsewhere. You were about to protest until you saw a bee come out of his pocket and fly towards the woman.

All he did was give you a look and said, "She will be dealt with."

"Wow that looks good. What do you think about this one?"

Michael peered at the cake that you were pointing at. It was a rounded cake with a flat top that gave Michael a view of brown sugar flakes and a criss cross coating of caramel and white chocolate drizzle. The notecard in front was labeled, ‘Jamaican sweet potato pudding cake’.

It was a delicious looking cake. Michael, the sweets connoisseur, was pleased with that choice and whispered to you that he wanted that one.

Both of you were hit with a craving for something sweet, which is why you both were at this bakery. It was rare for Michael to be seen without his mask outside with you (he was always watching from the shadows). However, sweets were involved. So he gets to be near you, potentially protect you, and get a cake out of it too. Win Win.

Michael was standing somewhat behind you. His (planned) placement was the reason why he was fast as hell seeing someone reach out for your hair. All you could hear was the sound of skin slapping behind you before you turned to see Michael gripping the fuck out of some dudes hand.

"Dude, let go!"

Michael said nothing as his grip got tighter.

"Bro, I just wanted to touch her hair to see if it was real!"

Come again? Real?

"Real??! What’s real is that nasty and musty ass hand is about to be fucked up!"

On cue, Michael breaks his wrist and he crumples to the ground, screaming in agony.

"We need to go"

You and Michael move to leave...but not before Michael grabs the cake you both wanted before sprinting out.

"The Juniper Hairstreak, or formally named Callophrys gyneus, is a species of butterfly that can be found in the southeastern parts of the US- Mainly Missouri and Alabama. Belonging to the Lycaenidae Family and the Western Taxa of the genus Mitoura, this species is often taxonomically debated. They perch on red cedar trees, to which their wings (which are originally green) will re light to mimic the color. They do not venture far from their habitat. There is a 2 brood life cycle in which adults only live for 1 week.”

The Cook Museum of Natural Science was a perfect spot to take Asa out for his bday. Although he tries to hide his facial expression, you could tell he was excited to be here. While Asa was reading the excerpt about the Juniper Hairstreak, you wandered a little bit away to view the pinned butterflies. They were all so beautifully preserved, the colors from the wings looked vibrant behind the pane of glass. Like it's beauty was stuck in time for forever. You turned to go look at more butterflies when some random woman popped up beside you. You get to move past, saying excuse me, when the women speaks up.

"Your hair is so beautiful. I've never seen dreads so long, are they real?"

"Why would it be fake? Excuse me, I have to be elsewhere."

" I just wanted to know, they just look so..." 

The puny woman reaches out with her visibly dirty hands towards one of the locks near your shoulder. One of the fingers make contact which makes your flesh crawl. This was disgusting.

 " No mam, we don't touch anyone without permission"

"But I just wanted to -"

"Know is its real? If it’s real, then it's real in it's consequences. Ever heard that before? Cause touch my hair and see what happens."

You started to move towards the scrawny woman before you felt a soft touch at your side. Asa was standing behind you. Actually he was the whole time, just from a distance. He had watched the whole interaction and stepped in just in time. 

He stares at the woman hard. Visibly uncomfortable, the woman leaves quickly.

You turn to say sorry to Asa. But he dismisses the apology.

“No need to say sorry, my dear. Actually, you’ve given me another present to deal with later on. Thank you” 

[rennystrawberry]

Some random Jomaria Headcannons that popped into my head here instead of sleeping:

The reason we see Anne Maria in the back of the ridonculous race? They moved to new york where Jo is a private trainer for like the real househusbands or smth and Anne maria studies fashion for pleasure using whatever compensation money she got for giving up her spot in all stars for Gwen <//3.

the earliest Id say they could have moved to new york in 2012, assuming that ROTI is set in 2009 when they were like 16 so they'd be 19/20 at that point and the last season of Gossip girl was being filmed at the time so Anne Maria would literally take time out of her day to try and get into the background of as many shots as possible and be on tv again while jo would be constantly texting and calling her to make sure that she wasnt doing exactly that.

Jo will go on morning runs and sometimes Anne Maria will join but she refuses to run and ruin her juicy tracksuit by sweating into it so she does the milf speedwalk with weights in her hands and Jo thinks that its absolutely adorable and hilarious at the same time bc bbygurl why do you need to be doing this in a full face of makeup?

so she's always slowing down and walking backwards to tease a.m. she likes pretending that theyre strangers and saying cheesy pick up lines then playing offended when Anne Maria plays along bc 'omg my unfaithful gf! the horror! im not jo, im chad u cant like my lines!!!'

Jo once tried on Anne Maria's tight leopard print mini dress and thought that she looked so hot but would never tell anYone about it.

Anne Maria saw the whole thing.

she loved it sm.

She got Jo a dress exactly like that the next week and forced her to model for her.

Like she forces her to model all her designs and the new hairstyles she's been wanting to perfect at the salon.

Jo grumbles about it but she actually sometimes feels really confident in them. and she loves seeing her literal wife soulmate love of her life happy.

Anne Maria gets them matching tracksuits in bright colours with their names embroidered on the asses or smth like that.

Jo's perception of fancy clothing is dressing like someone's math teacher in some dorky button up or Hawaiian shirt with a mf bow tie.

but while she absolutely cannot dress herself, she pics up all of anne maria's fashion lingo and is like omg that's so passé to literally everyone whenever the roti gang have little meetups or reunions.

Anne Maria has a big family n Jo always feels so intimidated when she goes over, but then leaves absolutely happy because AM's little siblings adore her and prefer her n she always rubs it into anne maria's face.

that being said, anne maria's parents will ask jo before anyone else if they ever need a babysitter.

Jo's dads regularly visit jomaria's apartment in new york just for Anne Maria to take them places or cook them a meal n Jo will come home at the end of the day like, dad? pops? you didnt tell me you'd be coming is everything okay?

n all 3 of them just look up from whatever reality show or action movie they were watching like some deer in headlights.

the only time that theyve gotten into a genuine fight was over a really heated monopoly game where Anne Maria was convinced that Jo cheated so she wouldnt land on the go to jail square. n that was fuelled by AM's frustration over how many times she'd had to pay taxes to Jo that game.

safe to say they havent played monopoly since.

but they do like completing those puzzles that have like tons of tons of pieces and take ages to do.

they start a cooking youtube channel once YT becomes a bit more relevant.

actually, theyre probably the masterminds behind that one insta account where the cat cooks stuff

bc they so would adopt a fluffly lil white cat after watching the aristocats together and name her like penne pasta or smth like that.

spaghetti the cat

carbonara maybe idk why im only seeing this cat be named after pasta though.

[ihatebnha]

Pray for the day when people would stop associating blonde hair with yt peepole. The correlation is not there, idk why Nicki is reaching so hard. Nicki is so quick to defend someone doing blackface then have the nerves to look an actual black woman in the face and say that she’s “jealous”

Nicki has always rubbed me the wrong way when it comes to being a Black woman and how she speaks about Black women. She has no problem calling them roaches, calling them “black bitch”, monkeys, the list goes on and on. It’s women empowerment until it’s a Black Woman that’s a shade darker than her.

I used to like Nicki growing up, been a huge fan of her my whole life but there comes a point when the artist and the person behind it just doesn’t align with who you are and that’s just how I feel about Nicki🤷🏾‍♀️

Wow....... i am so glad you sent this.

i definitely think there's this sense that, you know... barbs aren't in the wrong for defending/supporting nicki simply because they're barbs or whatever... and despite everything that's happened so far, im glad to know that this situation is helping us get to the point where we see that that kind of behavior is actually so unacceptable.

not that it was ever really expected or seen from her, but supporting, uplifting and listening to black women (such as leigh-anne, i think) is so... instrumental... and for someone as influential as nicki NOT to do that in an industry that already devalues black women anyway (and then marry a r*pist)... is weird and sad.

like... she literally works w/ these people and KNOWS this? i dont understand how she can praise urself for getting ahead as a black woman and then shit on others for doing the same? what???? white people have done nothing to benefit her and yet thats who she sided with?? SO WEIRDDDDDDD :/

ANYWAY, thank u for sending this, anon! this whole ask is honestly so articulate and i couldn't agree w/ u more, esp given that i want to highlight voices besides my own when it comes to... talking about a subject like this. i appreciate u <3

[elizabethvaughns]

When and how did you come into your fandoms?

for falsettos, i think i heard first about it due to the "late for dinner late again" part from "this had better come to a stop". i was in 8th grade then(so like 2018 ish?). it wasn't really my style of music back then, though, so i didn't really think to check it out. in 2019, two(2) falsettos songs came up on my spotify shuffle despite my not knowing them: "i'm breaking down" and "you gotta die sometime". my music taste had evolved a bit by then, and i immediately fell in love. so i saved the two songs. but i still didn't listen to the full album bc i don't really enjoy trying new things. in august 2019, my best friend and i had just gotten our schedules for sophomore year and we were just hanging out at her place because it was very hot outside. we were just talking about our summers, and i mentioned that i had recently listened to waitress. she recommended falsettos to me, and i said that i'll check it out soon. some two-ish weeks later, i listened to the whole album. this was my new obsession. for the next two months, i listened to it over and over and over again. then on the fateful day of 2 october 2019, i was just cleaning my room, when i found the proshot on youtube. i clicked on it, i watched it, and by the end of “what would i do?”, i was crying. by that point, i was hooked. i still am, to this date. (also, in april 2020, i listened to in trousers. because…quarantine, and i wanted to listen to new musicals).

i really really love the found family aspect of this, and also marvin’s character development.

now, for if/then. this story dates back to 2018 as well. more specifically, july 2018. the height of my rent obsession. so i was reading this rent fanfic on ff.net comparing maureen, elphaba, elsa, and…drumroll please, elizabeth. i’d heard of frozen, rent(obviously), and wicked before. but never of if/then. so i checked out the wikipedia page. the plot made no sense to me. but idina menzel and anthony rapp? i’d have to check it out sometime!

(john mulaney voice) and then i didn’t.

some two years later, in april 2020, i was looking for new musicals to listen to, because quarantine. suddenly i thought of if/then and decided to listen to it. i loved loved loved the soundtrack! one issue i had, though, is that i could not fathom the plot for the life of me. you can’t decipher one timeline from the soundtrack? try deciphering two! the wikipedia synopsis made zero sense and was actually counterproductive (since it implied that some songs that involved both timelines were actually specific to only one timeline). i tried looking for fanfictions to try figuring out the plot from there. but ao3 only had some two non-crossover fics and ff.net had some 3-5 (not counting rpf fics). so…i couldn’t decipher the plot. i knew a few basic details: liz chooses kate and beth chooses lucas, beth gets the job and liz does not(why? i didn’t know), liz dates josh and beth kisses stephen and hooks up with lucas, both liz and beth get pregnant, and both josh and lucas propose but only liz goes through because beth wanted to focus on her career, josh dies(but only in one verse?), lucas and david are together but only in liz-verse, anne cheats on kate in both timelines but they only get back together in the beth timeline, and that’s it. that’s all i knew. so, i kinda lost interest by june. my interest peaked again sometime in february 2021 when i started to listen to the soundtrack on repeat…again. in march 2021, i saw an if/then bootleg in my yt recommended. i thought, “fuck it” and clicked on it to watch it. and hOLY SHIT IT WAS PHENOMENAL. things that made no sense in the soundtrack started to click and fall into place. i was in love. …aand in april (like 6 april ish if i recall correctly) i watched the dc version. and now we’re here. with me running a mostly if/then blog on tumblr dot com.

the thing i probably love most about this is how all of the characters are just…normal, nuanced people. the fact that they are nothing too special makes them special all in itself. (also i really really admire beth)

[have-each-others-six]

time will tell, she’ll see us through (pt. one)

hey, it’s been a while, huh?

welcome to my first fic in like six months! this is another multichap, probably around six parts- let me know how often you’d like parts to come out. right now i’m thinking daily, but i don’t know, so if you have an opinion let me know in the replies!

okay, that’s enough of me talking. enjoy cathy angst!

tw: death, blood, beheading later in the chapter

***

“...yf ye be lerned in that scyence that ys possyble ye may of one word make a whole sentence, and yet nott at all tymes arryve at the true meanyng of the writer, as yt appyrs by thys your exposycyon apon my wrytyng.”

-Catherine Parr, in a letter to Thomas Seymour just before her marriage to Henry VIII

***

When Catherine Parr first notices she’s lost her manuscript, it’s four in the morning and she’s the only one awake.

She’s biting on her lip as she finishes the last page, blue pen smearing under her hand as her scrawling handwriting marches crookedly across the paper. This story- the story of the queens as separate from Henry, what they actually did with their lives, who they really were, their story- is the culmination of literal centuries’ worth of work.

If she doesn’t write this down, then they’ll be forgotten, lost to the wastes of time as simpering mistresses who were merely accessories to Henry’s reign.

The show is good, but the show is temporary, the legacy of that is temporary, and this manuscript is something physical that she can hold in her hands.

The last line is scribbled on the cheap notebook paper she’d had to use for the last page. It’s almost anticlimactic, how fast it is, and Cathy leans back in disbelief, the pen hanging limply in her cramping fingers.

“It’s done,” she whispers aloud, and her earbuds are still playing the instrumental hardcore rock she listens to while working, and the street outside is still crowded with London traffic, and Anna is still snoring down the hall.

Everything is exactly the same as it was a few minutes ago, except everything is completely different, shifted into a sharper focus through a new lens.

She’d started writing the last page at rehearsal, ripping a page from the awfully torn-up notebook that tech used to read lighting cues because her full manuscript was still in the greenroom, scribbling down line after line of her sudden idea as the other girls did vocal warm-ups around her.  

“What page is this, five thousand?”Anna had joked, sitting down next to her onstage and nudging her with her shoulder, looking down at the slanted scrawl on the ruled lines.

“It certainly feels like it,” Catherine had replied absentmindedly, completely focused on the page in front of her as Anne did handsprings onstage in beat with the warm-up tongue twister, and Anna had left and let her be, knowing how she needed to get her ideas down if she was going to focus on the show.

What she told Anna wasn’t just placating. It had felt like it, honestly. This has been her whole life for… well, her whole life. And now it’s four in the morning, and she’s listening to heavy metal music, and it’s done.

She reaches over to where the rest of her manuscript sits on her desk, her eyes locked with pride on the last line of the page, but her hand lands on an empty table.

A pit yawns open in her stomach. No, no, no. It has to be there. It’s always there. She looks up, hoping against hope that her hands are deceiving her, but her eyes confirm it. Her manuscript- her life’s work- is gone.

Catherine gets to her feet quickly, going to her desk drawer and ripping it open, but it’s not there either. It’s not on her bookshelf, or on her bedcovers, or under her dresser- it’s like it’s disappeared. 

She finds the papers in her desk again and spreads them out on the ground, kneeling in the center of the chaos and rifling through them frantically. Half-finished short stories and spindly outlines of landscapes flash past, but her thick stack of paper that she’d tied together with an old piece of ribbon remains missing.

She tosses aside cards and songs and tirades written in French, but it becomes clear that the manuscript isn’t in her room, and she sinks back on her heels. There are tears on her face and panic in her heart, and her mind races feverishly as she tries to think of anywhere else it could be. She’s only dimly aware of her own foggy exhaustion.

As she digs through the papers on her floor, the words and pictures on the pages start to blur together in her hysteria, and it’s gone, it’s gone, it’s gone-

“Cathy?”

The voice is tired and soft, and when Catherine looks up she sees Aragon standing there.

“Everyone’s going to wonder where you are when they get up,” Cathy points out in a quiet voice in lieu of a greeting, her cadence trembling slightly. Aragon usually gets up before everyone else and makes them breakfast.

“They won’t wake up for another two hours,” Aragon replies calmly, picking her way carefully through the scattered piles of paper to get to Catherine, a shivering, unstable island in the sea of words. “What happened?”

“My manuscript is gone,” Catherine whispers lowly, grief thick in her throat, and Aragon shifts closer to avoid falling on any of the papers, her eyebrows knitting together. 

“What?” she asks quietly, surprised. “I thought it was-”

“It was everything,” Cathy interjects softly. “It was all of my memories, and everything about our lives, and everything about- about Mary that I could piece together,” she says, her voice breaking on the name of her tiny daughter. “It was everything,” she repeats.

“Don’t use the past tense yet,” Aragon says gently. “It can still be everything. We’ll find it, I promise.”

“How can you promise?” Catherine asks, shaking her head. “How do you know?”

Aragon shrugs and gives her a gentle smile. “I don’t. I believe, though, which is almost as good.”

“Your confidence is incredibly reassuring,” Catherine grumbles, running a hand over her face to try and bring herself into a rational frame of mind, attempting to organize her papers back into some sort of categorized piles. “Where could it even have gone?”

“Did you take it anywhere recently?” her godmother asks, gathering up a sheaf of stories in her arms and sorting them into a desk drawer.

Cathy nods quickly, snapping her fingers in realization. “Yeah! Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, I took it to the theater last night, and then before that to the coffee shop. But I know I took it back home,” she says, the sudden energy leaving her body, certain of her memory of placing it in her bag.

“Well, it’s not here, so we may as well try it,” Aragon replies with a shrug. “However, I’m going to suggest that you try and get just a little bit of sleep. I know that you don’t want to,” she says, holding up her hand to interrupt Catherine’s protests, “but I think your memory might be more reliable if you sleep for a while. I’ll make some breakfast for when you wake up, and then I’ll drive you to the theater. Deal?”

Catherine sighs. “Fine,” she mumbles, trying to hide her yawn, but Aragon notices it and takes her to her bed, tucking her in and fluffing the pillow.

“Sleep, darling. I’ll wake you up when breakfast is ready,” she says gently, pressing a soft kiss into Cathy’s hair. “You’ll feel better. I promise.”

Grumbling, Catherine pulls the comforter a little tighter around herself for security and buries her face in her pillow, her mind racing as she thinks about where her manuscript could possibly be and if it’s been stolen, or ripped, or if pages are missing-

Eventually, her anxiety sputters out like a bad engine, the panicked thoughts appearing farther and farther apart, and she falls into a fitful sleep. When she’s scared, her nightmares are always more vivid, and today is no exception.

She’s standing in a castle.

It’s always a castle.

Sometimes, Henry is there, screaming at her as his old, wrinkled face turns purple with rage. Sometimes, it’s Mary, her little girl, wandering through the hallways and calling desperately for her mama.

And sometimes it’s just Cathy, all alone in the dark.

Tonight, though, she’s sitting in a dining hall, the other queens seated in ornate chairs along the table. Their faces are all lit by the candles that are dripping wax on the tablecloth, their features garish and overdrawn in the too-deep light.

Cathy is having a conversation with Katherine, realizing that they’re speaking in the ancient English of their old lives with its heavier vowels and thicker consonants, but she’s distracted from this thought when she feels a shiver scrabble its way up her spine for some reason as she glances around the room. The hearth crackles as it should, the heavy drapes let in the watery light from outside, and every so often Anne will laugh and the sound will carry over to where Catherine is sitting.

It reminds of her days as a royal with Henry, but she and these women were never all in the same room together in their old lives, kept apart by circumstances beyond their control.

She’s lost in thought about the past, her conversation with Kit having tapered off, when she hears a scream that sends an awful chill down her spine.

It’s Aragon.

Her godmother’s body crumples unnaturally, the expression on her face contorting into one of anguish, and suddenly Catherine knows that she’s watching her die. A half-scream gurgles out of Aragon’s throat as Cathy tries to get up from her chair, but for some reason she can’t move, a force much greater than she can oppose keeping her where she sits. 

No one else is reacting, even as blood dribbles awfully out of the side of Aragon’s mouth and she twitches and jerks uncontrollably, a startling juxtaposition in the glamour of the austere hall. 

Cathy needs to wake up, she has to wake up, she can’t just sit here trapped and watch Aragon die, but when she closes her eyes tightly and opens them again she’s still sitting at the head of the table, her heart pounding in her chest.

She falls still after a few minutes, and Catherine’s unable to contain her scream anymore. “Is anyone going to help her?” she shrieks, gesturing at Aragon’s unmoving form, panic settling horribly in her chest as all of the other girls just tilt their heads and look at her curiously.

“Who?” Anne asks her in the old tongue, somehow sounding like both her modern and first self at once, furrowing her brow in courteous confusion with a pleasant smile, but the typical wicked spark of mischief in her eye is absent, heightening Catherine’s anxiety. She processes the question a little after it’s asked, and dread seeps into her mind once she realizes what it means.

“Catherine of Aragon,” Cathy says slowly. “Henry’s… Henry’s first wife. Henry divorced her for you.”

“The name doesn’t ring a bell,” Anne says with a polite shrug, the phrase sounding anachronistic in her mouth. “I haven’t a clue who you’re talking about.”

“Anne, come on,” Cathy pleads desperately. “You can’t forget her, she’s a part of your life- of all of our lives.”

“I don’t remember any Catherine of Aragon,” Anne replies, voice shifting into a firmer tone. “I apologize, but I really don’t.”

“She’s right there, for God’s sake!” Catherine shouts, finally able to get to her feet, and she gestures at the body, oh God, Aragon’s body, with her eyes rolled back into her head and blood dripping grotesquely from the corner of her half-ajar mouth, and Anne looks offended at her outburst. 

“You don’t speak to a lady in that manner,” she says coolly. “You of all people should-”

She’s building towards an argument, and Catherine starts to feel some sense of relief as Anne’s familiar temper clearly starts to rise within her, but then a sharp, clean line draws itself across her neck and her head lands on the floor.

Cathy screams again, Anne’s blood coating her hands, and no one reacts, continuing to make respectful conversation and discuss benign things like hunting grounds and the weather.

“She- she-” Catherine sputters, unable to form a full thought in her terror, because Anne’s body is still slumped in the chair while her head is on the ground, dark eyes reflecting the light of the fire.

“What, dear?” Jane asks, looking at her with concern. 

“Anne is dead! Can’t you… can’t you see it?” Cathy asks desperately, voice fractured with fear, and Anne’s blood spreads through the carpet, soaking Cathy’s shoes.

“Who’s Anne?” Jane replies, looking thoroughly puzzled. “I don’t think I’ve ever known an Anne. Perhaps I had a maid named Anne once?”

“Anne Boleyn!” Cathy screams. “She was beheaded on charges of adultery!”

“There’s no need to scream, love,” Jane says gently. “I don’t think any of us ever knew this Anne girl, but we’re sorry for your loss, we truly are,” she tells her, and the other two queens nod sympathetically.

“You really don’t remember her?” Cathy asks softly, fearfully, but before they can respond Jane lets out a guttural cry, back arched in devastating pain, and then falls completely silent, her eyelids twitching unnaturally.

“No, I don’t think we do,” Anna replies with a genial smile, looking as if she can’t hear the low groan that sounds from Jane’s chest, her breath getting raspier with every second that passes. “Katherine, have you ever heard of an Anne Boleyn?”

Kit shakes her head, her own cousin’s name seemingly unfamiliar to her as Jane’s body begins convulsing with fever across the table. “Sorry, Cath,” she says apologetically. “We really just don’t know who you’re talking about.”

Jane seizes, and Catherine rushes to her side and tries to keep her still but she’s beyond help, her pulse stalling under Catherine’s fingertips and her shuddering breaths shivering into silence.

“No…” Cathy whispers, her eyes filling with tears. “No, no, come on, Jane, come on.”

She vaguely registers Katherine asking who Jane is, but she can’t focus on that or her heartbreak will spill over and she won’t be able to save the rest of them.

“We need to make sure Anna’s all right,” she says urgently, standing up quickly and abandoning Jane’s body, but when she turns around Katherine is looking at her quizzically and Anna’s body is limp where she sits.

Catherine almost doesn’t bother to check, knowing what she’ll find, but she knows her friend deserves a proper send-off so she walks over anyway, her feet feeling like they’re made of lead.

Anna is dead, her hands cold and hanging off the arms of the chair- Cathy’s liveliest friend is still and silent, the light stolen from her eyes, and Cathy doesn’t even have enough space to process the grief that’s coming in waves from every death she’s witnessing.

Cathy knows what’s coming next. She whips around and rushes over to Katherine, and she feels her hand graze against a corpse and she’s definitely running over patches of blood-stained carpet, but she can’t stop. She needs to make it to her before whatever this ungodly curse is takes her too.

“What’s going on?” Katherine asks, completely confused, and Catherine just pulls her close, tucking the girl’s head under her chin in a final attempt to protect her.

“Please, God, don’t take this child,” she whispers. “Please.”

Her pleas are in vain, however, and suddenly a huge gash rips its way across Katherine’s neck. The girl screams in agony, her body curling against Cathy’s, and before she can comfort her or try and delay the inevitable, another cut slices across her neck and her head falls off onto the floor.

Catherine jerks away from the now-headless body, her dress dripping with blood, and she gets to her feet slowly, swaying where she stands.

She goes to Aragon’s body and kneels in front of her godmother.

There’s a Latin prayer of mourning that they would say together on the days that the absence of their children felt like it was a physical weight on their shoulders, an attempt to try and soothe the grieving ache for their babies that never leaves.

This grief is fresh, not so much an ache as a stabbing, violent pain, but she begins to say the prayer anyway because Aragon deserves a proper farewell.

“Re… requiem æternam d-dona ei, Domine et lux perpetua luceat ei. Requiescat in pace.” She swallows, and then says the English. “Eternal rest… eternal rest grant unto her, Lord, a-and let per… perpetual light shine upon her. May- may she rest in peace. Amen.”

She walks to the bodies of the rest of her friends- her family- and mumbles blessings for their souls to travel safely through whatever afterlife they believe in. It’s nearly impossible, to look at these people who had been so alive and bright and true and see them broken and glassy-eyed and tinged gray, but she can’t leave them without saying goodbye.

As she says her sort-of prayers, the faces of the bodies begin to become strange in her mind- unfamiliar. When she gets to Jane, she has to think for a moment before she can remember the woman’s name, and another moment before she can remember her connection to her.

Dread shoots through her, ice-cold and immobilizing, as she realizes what’s happening.

She’s forgetting.

Just like Anne, just like Jane, just like all of them did as Cathy watched them die one by one. She’s going to forget them. 

Lost to the wastes of time.

She needs to remember all of it, every little thing about them, she needs to hold six people’s history inside of her instead of just one, because if she doesn’t then they’ll all just disappear and she doesn’t know how to live without these girls.

That’s why the manuscript is so important, if she’s being honest with herself. She wants to tell their story so she can’t forget them, so that no matter what happens there’s a tangible record of their lives.

Focusing hard on her memories, she struggles to hold onto them, but it’s like cupping water in her hands, the past slipping away into some unreachable part of her mind, and she feels tears gathering in her eyes but by the time they fall she can’t remember why she’s crying.

She’s terrified- she doesn’t know who these bodies are, surrounding her, and she feels like she should remember, she feels like she has to remember, but she can’t, and when she tries to run she trips over someone’s long-cold arm, and she’s falling, falling, falling-

Her eyes fly open.

[sugarcoated-eloquence]

Foreboding (Targets: Part 2)

A/N: Hello, hello! Welcome to the shitshow, aka my blog. This is part two of a potential 4/5 part series that I am co-writing with the lovely @sweetestrequiems. Click here for Part 1. Each chapter is focused on a different queen or issue related to the queens. This specific chapter is Catherine Parr centric, but the other queens are all very present. 

Please note the following ships are canon in this fic’s universe: Parrlyn, Aramour

{Trigger warnings: anxiety, mention of blood, slight violence}

I should also note some passages are written in German and Spanish and should be google searched to better comprehend the story. 

Taglist: @sweetestrequiems, @theatergirl06, @silverpetals97, @six-fragile-dreams, @patdfobmcr-yt, @frogs-in-clogs, @mindless-pidgeon

Other than that..... enjoy! Below the cut.

It would not stop.

The constant feeling like something would go wrong.

Katherine Howard could not tell if it was the anxiety, or if it was something else. She physically felt okay, and everything seemed fine, but for the life of her, the girl could not put her finger on that bad feeling. Being so lost in her thoughts, Howard was found, brows furrowed, staring down at her food, rather than eating it. Of course, this raised concerns with her cousin, Anne Boleyn, and Jane Seymour. Boleyn’s face began to reflect the concern when she raised an eyebrow. Seymour had more of a sad-looking face, but nonetheless, the worry was quite present.

“Katherine?”

“Hey, Kitty… you okay?”

The two voices snapped Howard out of her trance. She looked up, shaking her head seconds after her attention went to the two women. “Yeah, yeah! Just had something come across my mind is all. I’m fine, really. Guess I’m just getting the typical pre-show jitters everyone gets,” which wasn’t a lie, either. But, Katherine did feel a pang of guilt in having to be dishonest with Jane and Anne. Howard was one of the Queens who always got some pre-show anxiety, alongside Catherine of Aragon– (much to everyone’s surprise)– and Boleyn. It wasn’t a rare occasion, though, considering they had just about an hour before they had to head to the theatre. It wouldn’t seem like much now, but this feeling Katherine Howard was having was not a good one.

––––––––––

During the matinee, Katherine could not shake off that constant thought.

But she was not alone. The feeling had begun to haunt her cousin Anne.

Anne Boleyn’s eyes began to glance around the audience, knowing that Katherine was in the middle of delivering the roast of the century to Jane, Catherine Parr, and Anna of Cleves. A certain man had caught her eye up in the upper level; the second row in the left Circle Slip of the Arts Theatre, to be more precise. Something about that blond hair. And cold, blue eyes. Something about the way he was leaning on the railing while he sat began to bother Anne. Her attention snapped right back to the show when she heard Katherine say, “I can’t even begin to think of how I could compete with you all. Oh wait, like this!” to signal the start of All You Wanna Do. But even with her focus on the show, Boleyn’s glances kept going back up to that strange man.

“I think we can all agree I’m the ten amongst these threes!”

What about him bothered Anne Boleyn so much? She did not know. 

Was it his face? No, he seemed to be fairly attractive. Was it the way he stared at all of them? Possibly, since he seemed to be rather uncomfortable when Aragon brought up Leviticus and Mary in No Way. He also looked disgusted during Boleyn’s spotlight in Don’t Lose Ur Head. He looked very, very abhorred with Haus of Holbein and Anna of Cleves. But his eyes when Katherine Howard was singing screamed danger, and Anne could see it. Her frequent glancing that first day saw him tense up upon a few lines:

“Tall, large, Henry the Eighth. 

Supreme Head of the Church of England. 

Globally revered, although you wouldn’t know it from the look of that beard.”

And the end of All You Wanna Do, as far as Anne could tell from where she was on the stage, had him gripping the railing tightly. Was anger the reason he furrowed his eyebrows, or something else? The distance was not helping her much. Overall, she was picking up a few assumptions just from the one matinee show. This guy was either a historian that pretty much agreed with Henry VIII’s horrible decisions in life, or someone the Queens knew personally. What Anne decided to think though, was the former. Maybe this guy was just a historian and unimpressed with the show, right?

That first show could have not ended sooner. But as the lights on the stage went somewhat dim to allow the six ladies to exit, Anne Boleyn paused and allowed the others to go in front of her. She kept her gaze on that very man, and watched him stand up, turn around, and head on out of the seating area. The fact that she was the last one to leave concerned Cleves a bit. Right before she could even reach the dressing room, the queen in red put a hand on the green queen’s shoulder. “Moment mal, Anne. Was stört dich? Du hast anscheinend nicht dein gewohntes Lächeln am Ende der Show gehabt,” the German gently gave the shoulder a squeeze. Boleyn found herself sighing. “What’s going on? You normally smile and you were barely holding one up today by the end of the show,” Cleves made herself translate what she had previously said. 

“I don’t know, honestly. I guess I thought I saw someone that Maggie knew in the audience. It was weird. I’m normally not out of it either. Anyways, if Aragon took the couch, she’s going to regret it. It’s my nap time,” the cheeky grin came back to the ruby lips. A nod from Cleves, and the two were well on their way to the dressing room. Was Aragon on the couch? Absolutely. And Anne 100% kicked her off of it just so she could lay down and sleep after she changed back into her comfortable clothes. No space buns, no makeup– just a giant hoodie and some sweatpants. 

––––––––––

The other dressing room was a little more lively for a good while.

Katherine Howard was up on her feet, bouncing around with energy. Catherine Parr had decided to join her this afternoon. What were the two doing while Jane Seymour took the time to answer some tweets and messages? Dancing. The two ladies were dancing, which was almost the catalyst for Jane setting her phone down and joining them. In fact, she just wanted in on the fun. The three danced around for maybe half an hour, before a yawning Katherine Howard took to the couch to take a nap herself. Parr and Seymour stayed awake, with Parr looking for her notebook and Seymour going back to the tweets and messages.

“Cathy, look at this,” tapping her counterpart on the shoulder, the blonde woman moved her phone to be between them both. “It’s us with our kids!” If there was one thing Jane Seymour loved about the fans they had, it was all of the fanart of them with their kids. A smile was brought to Catherine Parr’s face as she looked up to meet Jane’s eyes. “If there’s one thing I have always appreciated, it’s that they know we aren’t the only Tudors that kicked some serious ass.” The laugh both of them shared was quiet, as to not wake Katherine up from her post-show nap. 

The calligraphy pen twirled around Parr’s fingers for a solid minute or so before she finally began to write. Each queen had their thing to do post-matinee if it was a two-show day.

Catherine Parr wrote notes about her performances.

Jane Seymour responded to fans. And to as many of them as possible, too!

Both of the Beheaded Cousins slept their time away.

Anna of Cleves did various things, such as meditate and listen to music.

Catherine of Aragon normally left the dressing room to find a quiet spot in the theatre’s backstage to pray.

This normal routine was going to be shaken up a little too much. So much that Boleyn and Howard were too tense to take their usual between show naps.

––––––––––

The same seat every damn time.

Who the hell was this guy?

And why was he now looking so bitter towards Anne Boleyn and Katherine Howard?

Three weeks since the mystery man had first caught Boleyn’s eyes in the middle of a performance. But now it was a pattern. Two night shows and a matinee, and always on the exact same nights. Exact same seat, exact same everything. This was starting to piss Boleyn off, and scare Howard. He looked at them with more than just malicious intent in his eyes, to the point that Katherine sometimes blanked on her lines. It was to the point when Anne was singing, she’d put more emphasis on “Hold up, let me tell you how it went down.” just to spite him. This historian guy, or whoever he truly was, did not settle well with the cousins.

But on the night of a Sunday performance, the Queens all got a rude awakening they were not ready for. And the two to be given the first wave were none other than the Beheaded Cousins themselves:

Anne Boleyn and Katherine Howard.

––––––––––

This tension was so chilling that it even caused Anne to fumble a few of her lines. Even the infamous “Yeah, I read.” was not the usual confident, snarky remark it usually was. Having made eye contact with the mystery man while trying to deliver the line was definitely part of it, and for a moment there was a stiff awkwardness in the air. They’d recover quickly, of course, but the general consensus between the group was that something was wrong, and it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. 

The man quickly left, before the end of bows, and somehow located an usher and told him he was an old friend of the girls’. The girls weren’t too akin to refusing to meet people, so immediately after stagedooring and meeting fans, they all headed backstage to meet whoever had requested a personal meet and greet. Kit’s the first through the door and she stops dead in her tracks. Those eyes. They were the same bright blue eyes that she saw in her dreams at night, the same eyes she stared into right before… well… 

She swallows, backing up a little. Anne comes crashing through the door, chaos embodied, and happily dances around for a moment before noticing the anxiety seething from Howard’s small frame. “What’s wrong, love?” Kit simply points to the man, and Anne’s heart drops to her stomach as well. She too, can’t look away from those crystal eyes. The blond hair. The everything. 

Anne can barely talk above a whisper could even tell it was him would make the situation less real. Maybe it wasn’t, maybe he was just another person. One can hope, but no luck there, Anne. She can feel Kit shaking, and reaches to take her hand, letting out a shaky breath and considering shouting for Parr. 

The others trickle in quickly after, the ‘mystery man’ still just staring at the two cousins with ferocious intensity. The last to enter, though, is Jane Seymour. The metaphorical mother of the group, the caretaker, any other synonym you can think of. Jane is never one to cast judgement. She walks in, and despite the obvious tension, says a polite hello to the man. He simply nods in response. 

Parr joins Anne at the hip, whispering to her. “Is he what’s got you all rattled, love?” Anne lets out a small nod. “It’s him.” 

That statement reaches Jane’s ears and immediately her demeanor changes. She stands up a little straighter, setting her microphone down on the dressing room’s main table, and just looks at him. She moves a little closer, pushing the other girls behind her, and she can only say one thing. 

“...Henry?”

He steps forward, and while the other girls move back, Jane stays planted to her spot. He smiles, trying to turn on the charm, reaching for her hands. “The one I truly lov—” He’s cut off by a slap. Yes, Jane Seymour just slapped a man. He brings a hand up to his red cheek, eye showing that it indeed, hurt. Cleves stifles a laugh.

“Don’t ever associate that word with me. You don’t know what love is.” A few tears well up in the blonde’s eyes, but refuses to let them fall. Not for him. “Love isn’t keeping your wife from holding her newborn child!” Her voice breaks slightly, but she takes a deep breath, centering herself. 

“You all look so different.” The scruffy voice chimes, and immediately Kit visibly tenses up. She, unlike Jane, is unable to hold the tears in. Though they flow silently, they flow heavily. “There’s no need to cry, Katherine… or should I say ‘Kitty’, now?” 

“Don’t speak to her. You do not have permission to do that.” Jane moves to block his view, but he simply repositions himself. Anne elects to go in for a dig. The devilish smirk returns, though small, and she gives Kit’s hand a squeeze before moving a tiny step forward. 

“You know, mate, if you’re still having trouble… you know, with your little friend, we can get you a prescription for Viagra. Or Cialis, plenty of options.” She emphasizes ‘little’ by using her thumb and pointer finger to indicate his size. It makes Kit smile a little. The silence in the air was broken by a stifled laughter. That had to be the funniest thing Cleves ever heard Boleyn say outside of the wit written in the script. Aragon gave her a nudge, but even she agreed with the sentiment.

The blond man, finally revealed as the reincarnated Henry VIII, just narrowed his eyes. “How funny, laughter coming from someone who couldn’t perform.” Anne’s smirk went away, as she looked back towards Cleves with a hurt expression. Cleves’ grin was gone, with gritted teeth behind a closed mouth replacing it. Aragon let out a sigh. “That’s low for the man who so easily says he believes–”

“Catalina, don’t even get me started on you either.”

Not a single comment from Catherine Parr. She just stood there, feeling herself drift between a rational mind and pure impulse. Did this guy just come back to insult them, and get a second wind to take Katherine? Oh no, that was not happening. She saw it all, too. Jane’s reddening face from holding back the tears, Cleves’ rather tame anger, Aragon’s scowl… Kit’s pale face from the fear, and Anne being powerless. Jane Seymour honestly, had lost her mind way before Catherine Parr did in this scenario, but… there was always going to be a breaking point for the quiet one.

“So you and your whore cousin think you can just slander my name like that? I’d have you both back at the scaffold in front of the Tower if I had–”

“Scaffolds don’t exist anymore, you twat,” Boleyn hissed under her breath. 

“Enough, Henry.”

This was where Parr had enough. The other Queens gave a glance at their surviving counterpart, who wasn’t even looking up at him. She was staring at the floor, but for now. “Cathy, you should probably not… y’know, say anything,” Boleyn barely managed to get that sentence out, considering the crushing feeling she had inside of her chest. All that got as a response was a laugh.

“The survivor, Catherine Parr. Tell me then, my love, are you just as stubborn as you were back then?” He got every other one to crack, but little did he know that he would be the one about to shatter like glass. “Because you should’ve been the one to meet an untimely fate like your counterparts here. Of course, new body means a second chance at being able to–”

Henry stops when he sees Parr’s shoulders shake a little. She’s… laughing?

That’s why she was looking down. When she did look up, one saw her smile shining on like a light. Safe to say, Catherine Parr was about to tear someone apart. “You’ve still got quite a loud mouth for an old man. Tell me, did you ever finally learn to take care of yourself, you bobolyne? Thinking you have any right to talk to the mother of not only your damned son, but also the woman who was loyal to you for twenty four years?! And even better, the one you so graciously called your sister after your marriage? You’ve got to be kidding me right now.”

Jane felt a little insulted that she had to take a jab at Edward, but had the feeling it was necessary considering the situation. Hopefully Parr would apologize for it later on.

“Okay, okay… fair. Not bad, Parr. But why do those two get to wear shiny chokers while the rest of you have crowns? Does it further emphasize my point that Anne Boleyn’s just a hell of a tempting woman and that Katherine Howard–”

The smile from Parr’s face faded. The anger was present and everyone was mortified to see someone so quiet speaking up like she was. With vitriol in her voice, Catherine Parr officially lost her temper. 

“You KNOW exactly what the fuck happened, Henry.”

Aragon felt herself go to cover Katherine’s ears as her goddaughter began to lose her composure. “You KNOW why they have to wear those. You know damn well the crimes you fucking committed against them both, especially Katherine! She was a child, Henry! A fucking child who got manipulated and used! I want to hear nothing from your mouth, you snoutband! You have nothing to defend yourself with!”

Wiping a tear or two away, Jane Seymour began to lean into Anna of Cleves for some form of comfort. Even the German was surprised to be hearing the resentment coming out of such a powerful and rather cool-tempered woman. Just as Henry went to open his mouth, he stopped.

“Oh no, no sir! You have no right to talk here! Anne Boleyn lost her head over what, your delusions that she was out and about with men when you were just going around like you weren’t married? And because of that, she has to struggle to change her name? Are you actually insane or some shit?” The northern accent Parr had was thick. She was angry, and her voice said it for her if her facial expression did not. “Jane Seymour never got to hold Edward because you took him straight away for his christening. And she had to sit there, alone, in bed! Suffering through illness until she died without saying goodbye to her baby boy!”

Boleyn goes pale. Where did this anger even come from? She had no idea, but Parr was scaring her.

“My damn godmother was near a saint with all of the bullshit she had to put up with! Twenty four fucking years, and it wasn’t Anne who ruined the marriage. It was YOU. Aragon did some insanely remarkable things despite how you treated her! And Cleves! You just decide to take Cleves and humiliate her because she wasn’t beautiful enough for you? You’re an absolute wandought, Henry! You brought a Spanish lady and a German lady out of their comfort zones all because you didn’t know how to use your damn brain!”

At this point, Aragon had managed to sneak off into the dressing room, with Cleves now being the one to hold Howard. Boleyn was now hugging Seymour, actually terrified of not just Henry, but Parr.

Henry began to go pale. He was not going to recover from this.

“Who am I missing… let’s see, Katherine Howard? No, I got her. Anne Boleyn? Also got her. Jane Seymour? Check. Anna of Cleves? Check. Catherine of Aragon? Oh, yeah, her too. Would you look at that… I’m the only one left. Surprise surprise, the fucking survivor surviving again and this time, she gets to give it to you the exact way she wants to.”

“Cathy–”

“Shut up you lot. My turn to finally talk.”

A flinch from the group. Aragon had to take glances in and out of the dressing room.

“Oh wow, Catherine Parr. The survivor. The one who draws lines in arbitrary places, blah blah! She had two other husbands, what good could have she done being a Tudor queen? I DIDN’T TAKE ANY OF YOUR BULLSHIT IS WHAT I DID. Those books that everyone rumoured a woman was writing? Surprise, you tallowcatch! It was me! I’m the famed author of Tudor history. And I published under my own name once your pitiful body finally died. That can’t be that bad, Cathy. What a sad excuse for a sob story, right?”

Katherine Howard began to tremble more than she already was in Anna of Cleves’ arms. Catherine Parr made herself stand face to face with Henry.

“Ah, right, because she survived she deserves the backing vocals. WELL GUESS WHAT, HENRY? I’M HERE TO STAY. I HAD TO GIVE UP MY LIFE, MY LOVE, AND WHATEVER ELSE I WAS DOING TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR SORRY ASS. You might have forced these women into submission but no, I am not going to submit to some sad old man. You took away their rights, you took away their children… and poor Katherine…” A laugh. “You took poor Katherine’s childhood. You turned her into a disgraced whore. She is not and will never be one. She is a victim of your bullshit.”

“Catherine, my love–”

“No excuses now, Henry. I’m through. Your love ran cold years ago. And call me love one more damn time. See what happens.”

“My love–”

The weight of the sleeves helped Parr send her fist flying into his face. He stumbled back, feeling a warm sensation drip from his nose. Blood. He… was bleeding? “You actually got the nerve to punch an English King? You’re a mad woman, Parr. I’ll have you thrown on that scaffold just how–” A second punch, and this time, there was an audible crack of sorts.

“You wear a crown, but you’re no king. You’re a disgrace to human life, Henry. And this is for all of the women you hurt, manipulated, abused… and killed,” a lunge forward. The third strike was to his jaw, and the fourth was a solid kick to the chest with her heel being the first thing to make impact. Henry, having been taken by surprise from every hit, stumbled right back into a pair of men. Shaking her fist off, some of the blood ended up getting on the floor, and part of it remained on her hands. 

“I’ll be back, Catherine! Mark my damn words! Let go of me, you imbeciles!”

“Like hell you’ll be back!”

And just as she took a step forward, Aragon went to hold on to one of her arms. “Someone help me hold her back!” Aragon needed the help. Parr was under such a fit of rage she was dragging her godmother across the hallway. Seymour had to let go of Boleyn to try and hold on to Parr’s other arm. She slowed down, but still had enough adrenaline surging through her to keep going. Cleves just gave Howard a gentle kiss on the cheek before running over to help the other two ladies. No arms? No problem. She just held on to one of Parr’s legs.

Boleyn pulled her cousin into a tight hug, feeling a shaky exhale leave her body. “Kitty? Kitty, are you okay?” Just a nod. Howard was terrified to open her mouth after seeing the ungodly wrath unfold before her eyes. “I-Is… she mad at us, Annie?” Quiet and almost inaudible. The poor girl was terrified to even talk out of fear that Parr was not just angry at Henry, but at them too.

“Catherine Parr, what in God’s name has gotten into you?” Aragon furrows her eyebrows. “This is not you. What is going on? Talk to me, please.”

Anne reaches to take Kit’s hand. “She’s… upset. Not at us, I promise.” Anne had to admit, all of the ferocity coming from Parr scared her a little bit. The yelling reminded her a little of when Henry first stormed in and accused her. Of course, she would set it aside, but it was scary in the moment. She looks in Kit’s eyes, which are now full of tears, sighing and pulling her into another tight hug and rubbing her back. “It’s okay, babes… He’s gonna go away and we will be okay, I promise. The girls aren’t gonna let him get to us.” Kit just buries her face into Anne’s shoulder and lets out the remainder of what she wouldn’t let out in front of Henry. Thank goodness the men had taken him into another room until the police arrived. 

Anne pulls out of the hug for a moment and then walks Kit outside. “You look absolutely knackered, love… maybe we should head home as soon as all of this is over. Do you wanna change into something else? C’mon.” They both decide to change, but do so in the staff bathroom rather than in the dressing room. On the off chance Henry was able to see into the dressing room, they didn’t want him to see anything. Anne also thought a door with a lock was the safest. 

Once they finish hanging up their costumes, the two settle into the couch, and just hold each other. Anne hums a little of La Vie en Rose, and quickly, Kit falls asleep. Anne doesn’t mind. They were all done with the day, it had already put them through the ringer. 

There’s an apparent veil of exhaustion amongst all of the women, except Parr.

Sure, Henry had been apprehended at this point and he was stuck with his hands cuffed behind his back, but that didn’t stop him from being inches away from Parr’s face with a very devious smile. “I’ll be back, Catherine. And you six will have to deal with me all over again. Especially Kat–”

“Like hell you are!”

Catherine Parr broke her left arm free from Catherine of Aragon’s grip, and her right arm from Jane Seymour’s. The right hand took a vice-like grip on his shirt collar before her left fist came swinging at full power, and thensome since the weight of the costume added force. That impact had a very, very nasty sound to it. Even Cleves flinched at it, soon seeing the blond man fall straight to the floor with a bloody face. “Get anywhere near us and I will have you laying your head on a prison bench just how you made poor Katherine and Anne lay down as you murdered them!”

The officers picked up the unconscious Henry, and kindly thanked Jane, Anna, and Aragon for their cooperation. Parr however, got a warning, but that was about it.

Giving it a moment, knowing they would be out of earshot at this point, Parr releases a rather annoyed grumble. “He’ll fucking pay for his crimes against all of you. I swear on my life he will rot in a prison cell for what he did. If he thinks he can just show up out of nowhere and come back here to take us for fools, he’s wrong,” she almost hissed at the end. The thickness of her accent was making Aragon concerned, since to see someone as rational as her goddaughter be in such a state was a rare experience. Cleves and Seymour both looked up with mortified faces. Ever seen revenge personified as human? No? Now you have.

And her name was Catherine Parr.

“What in heaven was that?” Maggie asks, getting up and peeking out into the hallway. A small laugh. The thud was actually loud enough to wake the cousins, and they both get up, confused a little, and sleepily walk to join her at the door frame. Anne rubs her eyes and yawns, looking at Henry, now being pulled up by two police men. 

She glances to Parr, and then to Henry, and upon sight of Parr’s hands, she lets out a small, startled gasp. His blood was actually on her knuckles. Probably mixed with her own, if her knuckles had bust. Kit has a similar reaction, coupled with hiding behind Anne at the sight of the wicked man. “Cathy… let me help you get cleaned up. Mags, can you grab the first aid kit out of my backpack?” 

“Let’s just go home, first.” Parr says, a little cold, while watching an officer take Henry away. She wanted to watch up until he was inside of the car, so she could ensure he was going away for good. The other officer asks her a few questions about the situation, and she tells him everything that happened, down to the fact that they would be filing a restraining order, and that Henry was not allowed to see their show again. 

––––––––––

The six women had gone home after waiting… maybe an extra ten minutes after Parr finished talking to the police officer. The car was dead silent on the ride back to the house, too.

“I’m actually mad about the fact that he’s actually attractive now,” Boleyn rolls her eyes as she walks in after Seymour. “I’m kidding, obvs. But how is he alive? We’ve been free for… who knows how long now and he comes back? What did he want, anyways?” Seymour turned to face Boleyn, giving the brunette a gentle pat on the head. “It sounded like revenge, but I think Cathy has the actual answer to that. We can talk to her when she’s a lot calmer, though… she’s very…”

“Upset, angry… name it, I am probably feeling it.”

“We all are, love…” Anne goes to her, gently taking her hands, looking at them carefully. One’s very busted up, and the blood has now dried and solidified. “Let me clean you up, c’mon.” She motions to the kitchen, and the two head in there, Parr sitting on the counter while Anne gets the first aid kit out. “I’m not ashamed of what I did today.” Parr stares at the floor, expecting some sort of lecture or argument to happen, but it doesn’t.

“You protected me. That’s all I could ever want.” Anne kisses her quickly on the cheek before pouring some hydrogen peroxide on a gauze cloth. Before she starts to press it to Cathy’s knuckles, she looks the girl straight in the eyes. “Don’t be mad for how much this is going to hurt, please.” 

While those two work on that, the other girls drop their bags next to the door and slump into the chairs around the kitchen table, an apparent awkwardness in the air. Jane is the first to speak, and it’s absolutely filled with regret and apology. “Ladies, I am so sorry I lost my cool today. I shouldn’t have gotten so ‘up in arms.’ He just… I never…” She’s tearing up a little, and Kit offers a hand for her to squeeze as she tries to work through her words. She takes a deep breath, brushing some of her blonde hair out of her face. 

“I never got to tell him all of that. All of the resentment.”

Cathy grumbles from the counter, agreeing with her statement. “He sure got a taste of all of my resentment.” Her cheeks were reddening, and Anne doesn’t know what else to do past wrapping the girl’s knuckles, so she lays a kiss on them, hoping that will calm her down. “Shhh… no need to get worked up over that toff, not again.” Her hand goes to hold Parr’s face. “Let’s be happy, okay?” 

“Jane, we all had every right to react the way we did. Even Cathy had a right to bash his ugly face in.” Kit nods reassuringly, and the other queens mumble words of agreement, Anne and Parr silently making their way over to the table. Something about Parr’s energy was off, but the queens wouldn’t question it for the time being. They were all rattled, it didn’t take much to see it. 

“I just feel that as the mother of the group, I reacted rather rashly. I think–” She has to hold back some tears. “I think I should’ve composed myself.” This ends with the ladies all essentially tackling Jane with a group hug, even Parr, though not really seeming to want to participate. It was getting late, anyways, and it was almost time for her to begin her nightly writing. It would help.  

Anne clears her throat. “I think you did perfectly, Jane. He’s an absolute tosser for thinking he could face all six of us at once.” Kit laughs in agreement, and the two head upstairs. Parr quickly dismisses herself, Aragon trailing quickly behind after giving Jane a tight hug. 

Cleves takes Jane’s hand, giving it a squeeze. “Gute Nacht, Jane. Versuche nicht zu viel darüber nachzudenken.” Jane sighs. “Still don’t speak German, love.”

“Try not to think too much about it.”

“Catherine,” Aragon knocks on the open door, furrowing her eyebrows. “Mija, what got into you today? That isn’t you. Where… where did you even go?” A sharp look from the sixth wife to the first, before it softened up. It eventually became more of a look of shame as Parr’s eyes went to the bandaged hand. She really did do a number on herself, but that blond haired Tudor nightmare deserved it. She wasn’t wrong, was she? Or, had her morality become such an ambiguous grey area that maybe it was wrong for her to have sucker punched the man who beheaded Katherine Howard so unfairly.

The shameful eyes look up, seeing Aragon’s concern despite the slight scowl. “I’m sorry, Lina. I… no se. Yo lo vi y... Me congelé. Es como si todo el sentido racional dejara mi cuerpo y me quedara con impulso. Lo juro, no... siempre así. Tu lo sabes! Aunque asusté a todos, no?” The hurt in her voice was evident. Parr knew she became the morally ambiguous of the group, which was normally not the good thing. Aragon’s expression lightened up just a little as she approached her goddaughter, and pulled her into a side hug. “Sucede, amor. Pero no te enfades tanto con alguien tan horrible. Seguimos amándote, y siempre nos preocuparemos por ti. Ninguna de nosotras te tiene miedo, y eso te lo prometo.”

Those last words gave Catherine Parr just a little bit of hope. Catherine of Aragon gave one last hug to the woman before heading on out the door, but not without “Don’t stay up late.” being the last thing she said to the sixth wife. 

Kit and Anne stand in the hallway, chatting before going to their rooms, which were across from each other. “Lock your window, Annie, please.” It’s evident that Kit is still very worried about Henry figuring out where they live or figuring out how to get in. Anne nods, despite the fact that they lived on the second floor.. “Of course.” The girls hug and in a matter of seconds, they are both behind their respective closed doors. 

Kit leans against the door for a moment after closing it, but not locking it, and a few silent tears fall before she starts to change into her pajamas. “You’re okay. You’re safe.” She mumbles to herself, turning on her string lights and turning off the main light of the room. She debates what kind of music to listen to, mulling over it for a few minutes before turning on some classical. It was different, but it would work. 

Anne, on the other hand, immediately goes to lock her window and pull the shades closed, which was slightly saddening because she did enjoy looking at the night sky before she fell asleep. She sits on the edge of her bed for a moment, deep in thought about Cathy. She had to admit, the girl she saw today was one she had never seen before, and one she was pretty afraid of seeing again. That fire, while endearing… shook Anne a little. She has to force herself to shake off the thought that anger immediately translates to a person being anything remotely similar to Henry. 

“Right, then… bed it is.” Anne shuts off her lights and lays down, picturing that starry sky in her own mind. It would do. 

Jane settles in with the current book she was reading, a copy of Pride and Prejudice. A story of true love, one could say, and the text was actually helping to calm the blonde down about the events of the day. Aragon peeks in for a moment, and Jane gives her a soft smile, an unspoken agreement that they would be okay.

Though it seemed as if everyone was settling down, Catherine Parr had a storm bigger than a hurricane brewing inside. 

––––––––––

Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

Catherine Parr let that be the only sound to fill the silence. Normally, it would be music or something, but not tonight.

The calligraphy pen in her hands danced around her fingers, barely having touched the pages of the open notebook. Her vision was still blurred, much to her own surprise. Wrath was a powerful thing, and to have something take over the body for an amount of time would lead to consequences later in the night. In her case, it was a very horrid case of insomnia. While she dealt with insomnia most nights, she had the slightest feeling this was not the typical time to go to bed at 2 in the morning case. The pen began to slow down in her hand, and she held it still for the first time that whole night.

“It’s not the first time you write about how you feel, Cathy. It’s fine. It’s perfectly fine.”

It was not fine.

No matter how many times she told herself it would be fine, she could never believe it. Catherine Parr saw her hand shake, just the slightest, every time she wrote. Every memory from the last few hours was hazy, but simultaneously at the forefront of her mind. The usually clean lines of her penmanship were just the bit off from the feelings. Word after word, the anger began to flow onto the pages like water flowing down a river’s stream. So shaky, and so violent were the movements of Parr’s wrist. In comparison to the surprisingly smooth transition from thought to thought, her actions made her look a little crazed. One could even say she looked oddly desperate to finish writing.

Almost as if she was running out of time.

She was a writer in her past life. An author, really. The woman wrote books, psalms, meditations… name it, she probably has a manuscript of it somewhere. But this? This was not her. This frantic drive to write and write until the pages could take no more and the ink began to go through them was not Catherine Parr. In a way, it was almost symbolic. Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

There it was again. The ticking of the clock.

Time was no longer a relevant thing for Parr. She just let the time go on.

Last she could remember, it was midnight. But nay, the clock spoke otherwise. A glance at it revealed it to be four in the morning. Her hand and wrist were cramped up, and the tears that she felt falling were drying on her face. The pages had become full of nonsensical phrases, mostly a result of the anger still in her system. But that anger began to fade from anger into a depression.

Why couldn’t she be stronger?

Why didn’t she do enough at the moment?

The pain finally struck her heart. Silence began to be her worst enemy, and something she thought she’d never do is what she did. Parr slams her hands on the desk, crying out, almost as if it were a scream or cry for help. The scream was enough to wake up Catherine of Aragon in an instant. A second and third one woke Jane Seymour and Anna of Cleves up. The fourth one got to Anne Boleyn. In a worried hurry, Aragon got out of bed and ran down the stairs to get to the door before almost ramming it down with her own body.

“Cathy? Mija, what’s the–… Cathy?”

What she saw was a torn woman in front of her. Her bandaged hand had a little blood seeping through the ends. Some of the curls were sticking to her face, and her eyes were all puffy and red. Aragon gently pulled Parr up and into a tight embrace. “Escúchame. Todo está bien, Cathy. Estamos en la casa.” Normally, Aragon had a commanding nature that gave off the feeling of someone being safeguarded behind a wall, but this was one of those moments she was willing to let her wall down. Parr’s grip tightened, with the tears coming back and rushing in like an ocean’s grey waves.

Catherine learned just a smidge of Spanish for her godmother. Enough to get by with a conversation or two, but she was not fluent in any way. “Duele, Lina,” a sniffle. “Todo esto duele y no hice lo suficiente para ayudar.” And there was something about her goddaughter using Spanish in such a defeated manner that made Aragon crack a little on the inside. Her own eyes were welling up with tears as she looked to the door.

Seymour, Cleves, and Boleyn.

All three of them with wide eyes and fairly concerned expressions. But it was Anne who saw the tears forming in Aragon’s eyes and threatening to spill. The two lock eyes and it takes everything in Anne to not crack too. She gives Aragon a look that says, ‘Let me try.’ Lina nods and gives Cathy’s hand a small squeeze, and Anne goes and kneels on the floor in front of her. 

The other three stand in the hallway, knowing it was probably best to give the two a moment. “Did that not wake Kitty?” Cleves pauses, and then points in the general direction of Howard’s room, loud classical music streaming through her closed door. 

Anne takes Parr’s hands. “Cathy, please talk to me… please, love.” It takes Parr a moment to look into Boleyn’s eyes, which are also filled with tears at this point. “It kills me to see you hurting.” A hand goes to wipe some tears from Parr’s cheeks. It lingers there, cupping her cheek, Anne’s thumb reflexively going back and forth to wipe more tears as they fall. 

“It kills me to see you hurting.” Her statement is coupled with a small voice crack, and not one that you would usually find endearing. This was out of pure sadness and anger. She sighs. “I should’ve done more.” She looks at the floor, past Boleyn, though her head is now resting on the girl’s hand. 

“He’s the one that deserves to be on a scaffold!” She starts to sob again, leaning forward, and Anne catches her, in a sense. Shaking with anger, she lets it out, nearly soaking Anne’s shirt in a matter of seconds. “He deserves to die! Why is he here?” Her breathing becomes slightly erratic, heaving breaths joining in with shallow sobs. 

The three in the hallway silently elect to let the two work through it. It really seemed as if Anne was the only one who was going to be able to get her to calm down, even if only a fraction. Aragon lingers for a moment, and then decides finally to go back to her room, leaving the door open in case anyone needed anything. Jane does the same, but reads for a few minutes before going back to sleep. 

Anne isn’t sure what to do, so she stands both of them up, having to support Parr a little, and just holds her, swaying back and forth slowly. “Shh… babe… he doesn’t deserve your tears…” Anne, you preach this, yet you’re a mess too. Albeit, a mess because Cathy is crying, but a mess nonetheless. “He… he’s getting his karma. He has to watch us thrive. And he can’t do a damned thing to us. We’re untouchable.” She was also telling herself this. 

Parr nods quietly, latching on to Anne even more, as if letting her go would mean she’d disappear into thin air. Though she hadn’t actually said it, she knew she loved Anne. More than anything, and if punching Henry in the face was what she had to do to protect her, she’d do it every day for the rest of her life. 

“Can I sleep in your room tonight?” She speaks softly, voice scratchy as a result of the outburst. It was nearing five o’clock at this point, but it didn’t matter. With no hesitation, Anne replies with a simple “Of course,”  pulling away slightly to look Parr in the eyes. Those tired, red eyes, still wet with tears formed over a man who didn’t matter one bit. Not in this moment, he didn’t. 

The two make their way to Boleyn’s room, a twin bed being the only place for them, but it would be plenty of space. Anne lays down first, patting the small space next to her for Parr to join. It’s almost as if they’re out as soon as they cover up. 

Kit sleeps through all of this. Perhaps it’s the music blaring from her speakers, or the exhaustion from the events of the day, but it’s the first night the girl doesn’t wake up screaming. The other queens are really surprised to see her downstairs in the morning, looking well rested and pouring herself a cup of tea, seemingly fine. “G’morning.” She yawns, and the others just kind of look at each other as if reality has shifted. “Where are Cathy and Annie?” 

“In bed, still.” 

“Ja.” 

“I should check on them.” Kit says, setting her tea down. Cleves joins her, cringing a little when Kit knocks awfully loudly on the door and pushes it open. “Halt die Klappe, Kit…” Kit turns and looks at her, a puzzled look on her face. Cleves rolls her eyes jokingly, and then whispers again. “You’re too loud.” 

The sight upon opening the door is a combination of comedic and sweet. Parr is absolutely sprawled out on top of Anne, snoring loudly and taking up most of the bed. One of her hands is on Anne’s cheek, as if she had fallen asleep holding the girl’s face. Anne is awake, quietly scrolling through TikTok with headphones in. She looks at the two in the doorframe and smiles, looking down at Parr. ‘We’re okay.’ She mouths, and Jane and Aragon peek in, a small laugh coming from the Spanish queen. It warmed her heart to see the two all bundled up and Parr seemingly at peace, even if only for a moment. 

Parr makes a small noise and shifts, essentially pulling Anne closer and wrapping a leg around her. The ladies all smile, electing to leave the two alone. It was evident that everything would be okay, at least for now. Anne kisses Cathy on the forehead, letting out a happy sigh. Parr subconsciously replies with a small snore, and the two stay there, safe in each other's arms, for most of the day. 

A couple hours seem to pass and it’s about… noon, when Parr starts stirring. Anne notices this, and begins to smile. At least she was waking up. However, things were not going to go to plan, because in comparison to Anne, Catherine was a whole lot taller, and took up just a bit more space. Thinking for a moment she was still in her room, Parr went to try and roll to the other side of the bed, but immediately woke up at not having anything underneath her. A loud enough thudding noise got everyone’s attention.

The other four queens almost immediately ran to the doorframe, and Anne was sitting up.

In typical Boleyn fashion, she was laughing.

Parr on the other hand, was not very happy. “Ow…” Looking up, she just sees the green queen essentially laying back down because of the laughter, and a glance to the doorway reveals four others holding back laughter. “Oh haha, funny that Cathy Parr fell off a bed now is it?”

Through the laughter, Boleyn responds.

“It’s marvelous, love!”

[noshitshakespeare]

I'm wondering if the literary James I may have been one of overthink a problem, and to rely on compromise in order to avoid war even though he believed in divine right of Kings. And, much energy was being lost in internal strife. Moreover, his Queen was from the Danish / Norwegian 'tribe'. I can see the themes in Hamlet being very 'stimulating' for them. I was wondering if you have thought about what Shakespeare AVOIDS writing given the what may have passed for Political Correctness in 1609?

Why 1609? Almost all current critical consensus points to Hamlet having been written around 1600-1601, and the Stationer’s Register records ‘A books called the Revenge of Hamlett Prince of Denmarke as yt was latelie Acted by the Lord Chamberleyne his servantes’ on the 26th of July 1602, with the first Quarto published a year later... So even at latest it’s hard to believe it was written during James’ reign. Of course, Shakespeare may have predicted the succession of James, but that remained very much in doubt until the very end of Elizabeth’s life, so it’s a little bit of a stretch to assume that the play is fundamentally referring the James’ political ideas and beliefs. There’s too much speculation here for my liking. 

I see your point about James’ interests and Anne of Denmark, but topicality is a difficult subject in Shakespeare Studies, because he’s rarely very obvious about it. And if the play is based on ur-Hamlet, or on whatever other stories Shakespeare may have consulted, the location of Denmark is one present in the sources, not an active topical choice (see this post). Yes, one might select a story based on the topicality of its location, but given that the story is already in circulation in Elizabeth’s reign and before Shakespeare takes it on, there are too many possible reasons he could have chosen this story.  

What does Shakespeare avoid writing? Well, he avoids or doesn’t write about a lot of things.  Some of those things maybe he just wasn’t interested in writing about, others, perhaps he felt he couldn’t, but there’s no knowing what interested him and what didn’t. Again, there’s little point in speculation. As a scholar I can only really comment on what he did write. Still, ‘Political Correctness’ in the seventeenth century could be an issue of life or death (or imprisonment and a hefty fine), so the stakes are high. I try not to ascribe too much of a personal biographical reading to the sonnets, but he does write in sonnet 66 that art is ‘tongue-tied by authority’, so presumably he knew what it meant for there to be things you couldn’t write about. And he’s good at it, because unlike many of his contemporaries, he never seems to have been involved in very serious treason or libel cases. 

The question is far too broad to answer in any level of detail, but I think one way Shakespeare avoids writing about things that might get him in trouble is by not going into too much topical detail (and setting his plays abroad). He does have some topical references through which people date the plays, but not as much as a lot of his contemporaries. And in some of his plays Shakespeare does get into a little trouble, so he has to do things like rename Oldcastle Falstaff in the Henry IV plays. There’s a flattering imagined description of Essex returning from Ireland in Henry V, but it’s not present in the Quarto version, maybe because Essex was disgraced by the time that was published. Polonius is often considered to be based on William Cecil, Lord Burghley, Elizabeth’s advisor... But here we start to see more how Shakespeare works, because it’s not a direct parallel, nor quite a parody. It’s more that some parts of Polonius draw on things Lord Burghley did. The same goes for Falstaff, in fact, because, whatever the name Shakespeare chose, the original Sir John Oldcastle is nothing more than a point of departure for the character Shakespeare created. Once the name is changed, it’s hard to say Falstaff is a direct parody at all. These characters are seldom 100% nasty or good, and even in instances where people say Shakespeare is flattering a particular figure it’s always ambiguous. So Banquo is presented as the ancestor of James, but while not a co-conspirator of Macbeth’s, he’s not exactly Duncan’s protector either. the Duke in Measure for Measure is widely recognised as sharing many of James’ characteristics, but the resemblance isn’t complete, and there’s no consensus on whether it’s the portrait of a wise ruler or a sinister spying tyrant who controls his people through dubious means. Shakespeare avoids making direct comments by creating ambiguous characters who are not simplistic parallels of existing people. In most cases, if a censor asks ‘is this meant to be so-and-so?’ you could easily say, ‘No, not at all, this is how different my character is’. 

It always seems to me that the way Shakespeare approaches certain themes is much like how he draws on particular characters. He may write a play that could appeal to a king interested in witchcraft, but Macbeth’s witch-like figures are the weird sisters, and never explicitly referred to as witches. The queen was getting old, and the succession crisis was a serious political concern in England when he wrote Hamlet, but Shakespeare explores the question through an old story, and never completely specific to the circumstances of the time. It contains a queen whose marriage and sexual fidelity raise questions about heirs and succession, but Gertrude isn’t Elizabeth. It contains spying as a means of control, but it’s never entirely successful, and Polonius isn’t the prudent Lord Burghley. It shows a foreigner coming in at the end to take over a country left without a successor... A potential outcome of the queen’s childless reign, but brought about by the stock mass death of a revenge tragedy, not because of childlessness. All the circumstances depicted are only laterally related to the issues in England at the time and could easily be dismissed as a chance resemblance, rather than a direct comment, just as Hamlet’s complaint about ‘the law’s delay, / the insolence of office, and the spurns / That patient merit of th’unworthy takes’ (III.i.72-74) could refer to any society.

There are no doubt resonances and thoughts that happen because one lives in a particular time, but frankly, topical references in Shakespeare are not what interests me about his writing. While thinking about his writing in terms of contemporary events and references can reveal new and interesting things about them, that approach can never explain the plays completely. It’s very easy to end up reducing the plays to just another historical document, and losing what makes them so interesting and artistic.  

[excaliefur]

Anne’s Deathday Part 2

Hi, yes I finally forced myself to write. I’m really sorry if there are errors here, I am really tired right now and I really cannot edit right now. Currently out of coffee, haven’t slept for 24 hours and running on pure will power. I am aware that it’s been a month since her death day but I have a lot of things planned for this fic, it’s pretty complicated and it’s taking a long time. I’m hoping to get the second part of we can just talk out within this month, can’t promise anything because real life has really hit hard. 

Anyways, I hope you like it!. 

Total words: 854.

Part 1 

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Anne stepped back sharply, her eyes widened and her breath quickened. No, that hair, that hair was definitely Elizabeths. But how could it be? She was dead? And she was definitely not a 4-5-year-old child. Unless she could? Reincarnation was weird. Anne gasped, making the girl Elizabeth?, flinch. ‘No, no, don’t worry I won’t hurt you Elizabeth.’ she reassured. Elizabeth, that name felt so foreign in her mouth. It had to be Elizabeth, nobody else had hair like this. The girl squeaked and mumbled something. ‘Sorry, I didn’t catch that?’ Anne asked.

‘H-how do you know my name?’ Elizabeth stammered out, uncoiling herself a little. Anne stepped a little closer to her. ‘Can you see me?’ she asked. Elizabeth nodded. ‘Can you see my eyes? It’s really black right?’ She nodded again. ‘It’s just like your mothers,’ Elizabeth recoiled and shut her eyes tight. Anne could see that Elizabeth was dreading what she was going to say next, but she had to. ‘I’m your mother’ Anne said cautiously.

Elizabeth whimpered and shook her head. ‘No, no, it's not possible. She's gone! She’s gone and not coming back! Father told me!’ Her voice rising as she spoke. Anne hated seeing her daughter like this. ‘Your father is a bad man, did he ever tell you how your mother died?’ Anne asked, she didn't want to have to tell her but it was necessary. Elizabeth looked up in confusion ‘Died? She didn’t die.’ Elizabeth stated in confusion. After taking a deep breath, she continued ‘She left us, she ran away.’

Now it was Anne’s turn to be confused. She ran away? That never happened, Anne would never leave Elizabeth alone with Henry. Anne was filled with dread and worry. what the fuck?. ‘Elizabeth? What year is it?’ Anne asked carefully. Elizabeth looked unimpressed. ‘It’s 1536? Everyone knows that.’ Anne staggered back and fell onto her legs. What the hell was going on? A few minutes, maybe hours ago she was in 2020 with the rest of the queens and all of a sudden she was in 1536. How was this possible?

Elizabeth’s eyes filled with worry, and she stood up. ‘Are you ok?’ she asked timidly. Anne sat up and rubbed her head. With a groan, she stood up again. ‘Yeah, just a bit shocked.’ Anne said, taking another look around. ‘Hey Elizabeth, what is this place?’ Anne didn’t recognize the room. Elizabeth looked around. ‘I dunno, father and some bad men brought me here and said this was my punishment for being a bad girl.’ she said. Anne felt anger coursing through her veins. Who locks a 4-year-old girl in a dark room for some sick punishment? ‘Do you know how to get out?’ Anne asked, the door was still locked, and she couldn’t see any other possible exit. Maybe Elizabeth had some answers. Elizabeth flashed a smile and nodded. Relief flooded Anne, the walls were beginning to crowd her.

Elizabeth ran to another corner of the room and crouched. Anne followed her and saw a vent, barely big enough for Anne to crawl through. ‘When mother ran away, he put me in here and I found this hole, it took a while to open but it leads to the kitchens so I can get some food’ Elizabeth informed as Anne pulled off the lid. ‘I’m going to go first, you stay here ok?’

Anne said, she would be lying if she said she wasn’t scared of whatever was on the other side, especially since it was apparently 2 years after she was beheaded, but she wasn’t actually beheaded and she ran away here? It was pretty complicated but it was safe to say that Anne would not let anyone hurt her daughter again. Elizabeth frowned ‘I'll come with you! I know the way around here better than you!’ she protested. Anne shook her head. ‘It’s too dangerous, I’ll be right back after I see if it's safe, ok?’ Elizabeth turned away and mumbled something. ‘Sorry I didn’t catch that?’ Anne asked. Elizabeth shook her head, and Anne crouched down by Elizabeth, putting her hand on Elizabeth's shoulder.  

‘Please don’t leave me here alone’ She heard, it was very soft, But it rang in her head. Anne’s heart broke and she felt guilty. ‘No, baby, no, I would never leave you.’ She murmured, Elizabeth turned around and gave Anne a hug, which she gladly returned. Resting her head on Elizabeth's shoulder she heard her say something again. ‘But mother did, and you’re just like her.’. Anne wanted to cry, she was ready to straight-up punch herself for abandoning Elizabeth, even though she didn’t do it. ‘I’ll be right back Liz, I promise,’ Anne whispered. A few moments later she let go and stood up again, wiping the tears in her eyes and seeing Elizabeth doing the same. Anne crouched again, getting on all fours and crawling into the vent, she whispered a quiet goodbye to Elizabeth and began to crawl forward. Once again, into the unknown.

Elizabeth watched her crawl forward, before she put the cover-up again, and moved back into her corner.

______________________________________________________________

Hi, I’m sorry about the short fic, I did plan on writing more but this seemed to be a natural end so yeah. I’m going to go pass out now. Hope you have a good day folks!

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed)

@babeebobo​

@frogs-in-clogs

@annabanana2401​ 

@patdfobmcr-yt

@baby-gremlin18​

@yellowtwigs​

@never-need-your-love​

[onenettvchannel]

NEW THIS MORNING: LukaNette's Couple was Nearly Kissing at a Movie Theater, while a Secret Revelation of Ladybug is Allegedly Messed Up [#OneNETnewsEXCLUSIVE]

SEINE, FRANCE -- It all comes down to this, fresh from a televised press trailer... A newest information was both first reported between by Mid-March until before the observance of a Holy Week in the Philippines this year in 2021, from Globo Noticias on Gloob in Brazil & Le Journal de 13 on TF1 for TFOU in France.

Our South American Correspondent, much currently for the Nickelodeon News Bureau & Correspondent in Michigan region (Ronnie Anne Santiago) is on a Spot Report outside the News Headquarters of Canais Globo in Rio de Janerio.

You might remember in our recent developing story of BREAKING NEWS, that is only on our Facebook-exclusive post. Our theory from this said couple, in regarding to propose a wedding ring in advance and the illegal sexual activity before marriage... It turns out for a couple of things as according to our Research Team of OneNETnews.

At a honeymoon movie theater during a front-seated indoor cinema of "Crocodile Heart"... Instead of a wedding ring, Marinette was giving out a Plectrum for the guitar and the other useful instruments to Luka. It was quite too early to getting married in between with Luka and Marinette, under the Family Code of the Philippines: Article 2.1 & The Civil Act #3613: Section 27 or The Marriage Law of 1929, "No marriage shall be declared invalid because of the absence of one or several of the formal requirements of this Act if, when it was performed, the spouses or one of them believed in good faith that the person who solemnized the marriage was actually empowered to do so and that the marriage was perfectly legal".

Upon a cinematic couple between Luka & Marinette, a mysterious monster was appeared for a love interruption from this said dating of making out on him. We clearly don't know if it's possibly determined for a targeted attack against the Ladybug.

Meanwhile in Paris at a Boulangerie Patisserie bakery upstairs on her final home floor for Marinette... A newest guardian turnover was issued from Wang Fu of the Miracle Box for a later transformation suits of Ladybug. But suddenly, she accidentally pressed a centered Ladybug button to release all the Kwamis.

In a private text message as our TF1 News reporter (Marinette Dupain-Cheng) told exclusively to OneNETnews... Her friends like Alya and others, including Luka and/or Adrien... will be separated for good, due to her secret of Ladybug (in a Season 4 PREMIERE) has been committedly exposed to the public by accident, under a violation of Republic Act #10173 or Data Privacy Act of 2012: Section 25.

Optionally under a personal recommendation from a local psychiatrist in Paris... This may be added later for a Republic Act #11036: Section 4-k or The Mental Health Act of 2017. She will be sentenced for 1-3 years & 6 months in jail if pleaded guilty at a Court of Cassation in Sainte-Chapelle town for a Suspension or Prisión Correccional order, as possibly referenced from a Revised Penal Code.

A YouTuber Netizen named Kenana Machlah has pointed out for LukaNette's kissing and the opinion, "Marinette is not alright she’s stressed that she can’t hang out with friends or her boyfriend Luka, since she has to guard the Miracle Box and she’s stressed because she has to lie to them forever to keep her identity a secret. Luka felt like Marinette has a secret but he thought that he wasn’t trustworthy enough in her mind so he got akumatized into telling the truth. While he’s akumatized, he wants to know Marinette’s secret and Ladybug and Chat Noir’s identity. Luka was just trying to be there for her and comforting her but not rejected for sure since they will go on a date like we’ve seen in a spoiler and that date is in a different episode".

Machlah adds from this said comment, "Her friends wanted to hangout with marinette since she hasn’t been hanging out with them lately so they surprised her by a visit to her house. They knew that she was hiding something and very stressed so Rose took of the doll house roof since Marinette was being so protective of it they wanted to see what’s in there. Marinette's problem got mad at them and kicked them out of her room/house. They called Luka to see what’s wrong and he probably said that Marinette is very stressed lately and everything. So they all get akumatized because they think she has no more time for them anymore. It’s not confirmed that she did reveal her identity it could be she’s was telling her self. But if she revealed her identity it would be to either Luka or Alya. She wanted to tell someone so she or he can cover for her and at least he doesn't blame her for why she is so stressed and everything. She wanted someone to talk to about her double life".

The accidental revelation of Ladybug and a love couple as unfortunate, Gabriel Agreste (Adrien's father) will face an immediate interrogation talk using a brain telepathy, just a few hours before her criminal arrest of Ladybug at a French court in the afternoon onwards.

A LITTLE SHORT NOTE as FINAL: No LukaNette shippers were harmed in making of this news report, for now.

SCREENGRABS from the YouTube Channel Users of BeMiraculous, Cartoon Universe & MundoGloob

This news report is brought to you by: XTend Food Supplement for Men, Drivemax Adult Herbal Coffee (A Brigada Product) & Trust Condoms (Magtiwala sa Trust, Your RH Partner).

SOURCE: *https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TF1#France *https://www.chanrobles.com/executiveorderno209.htm *https://psa.gov.ph/civilregistration/civil-registration-laws/act-no-3613 *https://miraculousladybug.fandom.com/wiki/Truth and *https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQpstpcDDTw (referenced YT comment from Kenana Machlah)

EXTREMELY HONEST DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed from this news report are not those from the ZAGtoon, Method Animation & Canais Globo. These love-making couple and the issues does not really imitate in any matter. Furthermore, the assumptions of this news report will NOT state, intervene or reflect those of our Radyo Patrol reporters. The show, the station, management, interwebs, and the network. Thanks for reading, stay safe and may the Celestia blesses you. Later!

-- OneNETnews Team