#anon please dont take this as a personal attack - i dont mean to be rude or cruel

[sobuildabeautifulcity]

Your disappointment warrants a disclaimer though, otherwise you're seeding a certain sentiment a lot of trolls and shill are trying to whip up. Don't be that person who thinks writers and actors owe you endless content for less than a living wage.

i respect your opinion and you’re not strictly incorrect but… thats not my point lol & you’ve kinda proved my issue.

the main part of my thoughts was that i have an issue with, and i quote: not being able to post when you’re experiencing multiple conflicting feelings without explaining all of them without being attacked.

it’s not only about the strikes, it’s anything that someone thinks you cant have complicated emotions towards if you don’t explicitly say so. my example was about the strikes because thats the most recent thing i’ve seen, but it’s more than that. not allowing people to express only their negative feelings in their own space online, simply because it might overlap with people being dicks intentionally about it isn’t the right way to go about it. for example, saying you’re disappointed because your favourite band pushed back their album release doesn’t mean you’re not sympathetic to the fact they delayed it due to health issues, it just means you’re disappointed because you were excited about it & had planned for it happening on a specific day. you expressing that upset online shouldn’t need to involve a disclaimer, because it should be implied - until proven otherwise - that you care about your band’s wellbeing. if you send a string of posts abusing the band for postponing it, yeh, youre a dick. but if you send one which is ‘aw man this sucks so much we wont get the album’, thats not something you should associate with the people being dicks about it despite it being negative in tone.

idk, i like to assume the best of people rather than thinking they’re dicks & don’t feel a complicated way about things.

if someone expresses disappointment about their plans changing due to something, that doesn’t mean they disagree with the thing that changes their plans? it solely means they are disappointed that their expectations for the coming time period changed & to assume otherwise unless proven only makes your worldview more negative.

this… insistence that all your feelings must be explained entirely and in full in order for you to grumble about something online is exhausting, and unnecessary if you simply assume the best of people. and, quite frankly, it is why i stopped using my tumblr for anything beyond reblogging stuff until recently.

i’ll add a disclaimer here, as well as the one that’s in the tags, bc my point is being proven lol: i support pretty much all unions & their decisions to strike (us police unions are not included hence my ‘pretty much all’). i am 100% sure that the wga & sag aftra should strike & fully support them doing so, shutting down hollywood is a great way to have bargaining power. the conditions they are expected to work under are abhorrent & they need better protection. it is also absurd to say that you can’t express disappointment about things you were looking forward to being cancelled without needing to add a disclaimer that your frustration is aimed at the other side of the negotiations for not capitulating, and not at the sag members. if you are posting your feelings on your blog, you should not need to caveat those feelings. the default of people assuming the worst of others makes the world a worse place.

i have a tendency to over explain my point so that it gets across, and often that means my coherence suffers lol. please bear in mind i am cognitively disabled & severely ill.

[saltynsassy31]

no cus i totally understand your frustration, ive also quit splatfests for the moment until they get an overhaul

i suggest if you feel close to getting hateful to either shiver or shiver fans then maybe quit for a while for your own sake cus ive felt a lot better after doing so, im still really sensitive to negative comments towards frye or rude ones about shiver winning but taking some time for myself has made me feel infinitely better

ive been close to hating shiver before bc of how cocky and rude them and their fans can be but it doesnt really do anything but sour your enjoyment of the game more, so its really not worth it

i do have to say though, anyone who says "its just a game" reaaally needs to understand the frustration of people OTHER than them, sympathy is something a lot of people forget about when it comes to things that arent real life. just because it doesnt affect you doesnt mean everyone can shut off their attachment to the game or a character like a light switch; a lot of the time you dont know whats going on with them. i myself am really attached to frye cus i am hashtag autism creature and he brings me comfort, so anyone being rude to me about shiver winning really REALLY gets under my skin. its not entirely (if they were serious, if they werent then its not at all) their fault, but nintendo fixing the frustration of splatfests constantly keeling in one direction (which theyre supposed to do anyways but they havent) would definitely fix the issue. we need to find a way to have nintendo fix this, not attack anyone else for what bundle of pixels and text theyre attached to.

not everyone has really thick skin and if we want splatoon 3 to be more hospitable then we should try to cut down on the general splatfest bullassery in public spaces (being overly cocky and rude/blaming others in a way with no basis or truth behind it). its not something everyone can always do since we arent all perfect, but if we make steps in that direction then we could help more people enjoy the splatoon community rather than being eaten up by toxicity and spite

i didnt word all of this entirely correctly so like interpret ad best as you can cus im eepy but yeah.

a fye for u to enjoy (also ur anon is off btw)

u dont have to but for the sake of not being harrassed id appreciate if u didnt tag with public tags

👏👏 PREACH

I don't want to quit playing it, I do enjoy splatfests, to a certain extent, i like going with my friends and i made a lot of new friends through it, it's like, the online community that I'm having a problem with

I don't hate shiver, I thought I did but I can't, she is still a comfort character (tho Frye is like, my obsession besides being my comfort character cuz I am also part part the 'tism XD), in a way, I like her dynamic with the group at least, she annoys me, yes, very much so, but I don't hate her

And I don't hate people who like her either

Who I do hate is people being mean about it, I had turned off anon cuz of a stupid person who was going around every frye support account anonymously just saying mean stuff and praising shiver as the best, I just forgot to turn it on, so thanks for reminding me 😅

Saying that "It's just a game" is so annoying to, tell that to the football fans, they go just as crazy if not more so

Splatfests are ment to be fun! You should be able to enjoy the splatfest without having to worry about people fighting

I don't like fighting with people, I hate how angry I become, how mean I can sound sometimes, I usually just vent without interacting

At least she won in Japan, so that is one other win under her belt, I just wish she'd win more in the future 😔

Oh also I almost didn't participate in this splatfest either and I did only because I haven't had time to play and I haven't finished my catalogue yet 😅 I usually use splatfests to up my catalogue quicker lmao

Also, don't worry, I won't tag anything that could get you harassed, if anything does happen, please block for your health, I don't want anything happening to you, you seem very sweet ;w;

Edit: also YOUR FRYE PLUSH IS SO CUTE! I've been seeing people get her but idk where to buy her!!!! Where'd you get it? :0

[chelleztjs18]

This is not a question but i just saw the previous ask with that one rude anon and just felt like I had to do something about it because there is 2 things I genuinely despise in this world ,the first one being rude , inconsiderate and dishonest people and yes I’m talking about you Anon if you by any chance see this and the second being unfair accusations or situations now I will explain myself with diplomacy and actual facts to prove my point , you should take some exemple anon ,on how to bring a situation that bothers you to someone ,while still being polite and respectful.

You accuse chelle of being neglectful and no having enough time for her followers right ? I’m gonna reveal something to you , not everybody spend their entire day on the internet , mind blowing right ? It’s funny because if you would have looked further and was really interested not only about the author work but the author herself as well you would have known she has a little girl of a young age to take care of , hence why she can’t spend a whole day on the internet like a person with “no responsibility” such as a child could.

To continue , I would like for you to explain to me how is she being neglectful when she answers to asks literally everyday , I kid you not when I’m telling she is by far the author that interact the most with her community on here and I follow more than 50 authors/writers , she do asks , little games with emojis that allow us to ask her stuff and know more about her when she is not obliged at all and could stay completely private like some author i know do, she listens to everyone and I could continue like that all day long but still you couldn’t notice it since you were to focused on making false accusation and attacking her.

You keep on insisting about her taking to much time to answer to ask and more , do you have any idea of the amount of authors/writers that don’t even respond to comments or anything on here or even wattpad and don’t interact with their community at all ? And those who post maybe 3 times a month ? Im NOT saying everybody as to be quick at all or post everyday I’m nobody to exige anything to anyone but I’m juste showing you some reality chelle post maybe 1 or twice a week at least ,please be for real .And i will go further on this by saying so many authors give us amazing stories /fics etc ,to have little to no feedback in exchange or shitty ones and critics , when they put so much work on their posts , they are people to with feelings and lives.

To finish you said you weren’t attacking her right ? I kindly I vite you to reread you previous ask because you were clearly hostile even tho you claimed than you weren’t and word choices weren’t the nicest nor the smartest.

Learn to be better , to be nicer more respectful and have consideration for others you don’t know what’s going on on somebody’s life so don’t assume nor demand anything when you don’t have all the pieces of a story in you hands it’s just rude and unfair.

Have a nice evening and I truly hope my “ask” will make you think about the way you treat people because being behind the screen doesn’t allow everything nor excuse every behavior.

Hello Kay!

Wow, i'm speechless. This is amazing. I cant thank u enough for taking some of ur time to write this n to show ur support on my side. I almost cried reading this.

All the sweet amazing supporting things u write here really got me. I know we dont talk that much but i appreicate u a.lot for every reactions u gave me on my fic updates, ask games or just any ask / message u sent me. This means a lot to me.

I hope we can be friends 😊 u r very sweet and awesome! Im grateful for u and other friends i met here.

Cheerio!

[stargazer-balladeer]

HiHi enstarrie here. you liked some of my posts so I came and saw your rant.

Yes, you pretty much get it. this community has being going through a lot since engstars release, the fame it's getting but the lack of information it's spreading are things that we're not very happy about,,

You see, enstars is a game that heavily relies on reading. so imagine how we feel when the new players are coming here and doing everything but that. I accept it, we've been very sour towards the newbies because of their lack of information (I'm vv sorry) though Tumblr is pretty chill overall? there are other places like TikTok that are hosting misinformation sprees and it's very painfully and raging to watch. TwT

If you read the original story, you'll notice that Akira (one of the main writers) makes a lot of references to classic literature and plays. quotes poetry and other similar things !! Akira is a well cultured person, and his writing is part of the spark that brings joy to all the enst stories.

So imagine when the eng translation gets released. a tl not even made by english natives neither proofread by anyone. a tl that doesn't get all those references I spoke about. a tl that had to be purposely censored to avoid conflict (though I agree. there's bigotry and other problematic topics in a lot of stories) because western audiences are not good at handling them.

Happyele (the company who manages the game) is extremely strict with copyright. that's why you won't find a single leak about the game. why you won't easily find translations publicly (tls are actually illegal. that's why the wiki got nuked approximately a year ago) and that's why fan tls are a miracle. fans do get their references. fans make their investigations and their proofread with the most amazing quality, they're literally the miracle of this community.

Also, you pretty much got it !! "entering our community so violently" yes !! most of us feel that way. please don't get us wrong, I've seen some new players complain that we're being "rude" because of our silly gatekeeping; however, even if we're not receiving them with open arms and the biggest smile, we haven't harassed neither attacked anyone (actually we've been trying to help with guides and things).

As you said, this community has always been very small, so all of us know each other and all of us are in the same page (?) obviously since the game is getting more popular, more people are entering this place and I guess that makes us feel unsafe, since not everyone agrees on the same things once communities start growing.

I apologize for this ramble in your ask. with this I really don't want to discourage you to enter this franchise. actually most of us have been making guides on how to read stories and similar !! overall I just want to thank you. you're the first eng player I've seen that empathized with our situation 0(-(

I hope you have a nice day !! feel free to come to any of our blogs to inform yourself further if you feel like it.

Wah- well whoever you are behind that anon, i think you have an amazing writing 🫶 HSHHSHS PLS I’ve probbly already read most of the fics existed here in tumblr for enstars 🥲🥲

Anyway, I understand that ya’ll aren’t that welcoming ehehe its really scary qwq i’ve always hated when communities starts to grow, which means at some point, there’ll be uhm ✨ toxicity ✨ (*discreetly looks at one certain fandom*) it doesnt make it better when enstars is LITERALLY ON ADS QWQ everywhere i look there’ll be an enstars ad pls- but im still salty that they haven’t released from where im from >:(

And we all agree that eng translation can suck 😒😒 twst is another example of that smh

Thank you for the information 🫶🫶 i really appreciate it! Also thank you for taking the time to write this and for the guides ehehe (the sorry ramble part) its finee dont worry about it

I HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY TOO !

[1kook]

Hi Everyone, please read

tw// racism

First of all, I just wanna say I’m so grateful for all the nice anons and interactions I get to have with people here everyday. I live in a densely populated city so quarantine regulations were super tough when this all started in March and remain strict even all the way into October. I haven’t been able to see my friends a lot or anyone outside of my family and job, which really sucked, but it was fine because I had my blog! The beginning of September I had two fics that did so amazing and of which I am so thankful for their response, because with that came a lot of new anon friends!

I have been on tumblr since 2012, but I have never received the same amount of interaction as I do now. I’m so happy I can interact with people on here be it anonymous or not. I enjoy hearing ideas and doing my best to fulfill them, hearing about someone’s day, and laughing about stupid jokes. It’s gotten to the point where some have picked names and further fleshed out our friendships because of how close we’ve gotten!! I have had so much fun everyday asking stupid questions and getting equally as silly answers and it’s all because I was able to make people feel comfortable on my blog.

However, people are not always nice. That’s fine! It’s the internet, this will always happen. Rarely do I get hateful anons and rarely do I post the few I do get. Sometimes they’re funny and I laugh and go about my day. Most anons have been about my style as an author, the types of fics I put out, and for the most part, the similarity in all my fics. I’ll address this now. if you feel my fics are all the same then consider this.

1. I write fics FOR MYSELF about ideas I have and want to see, and post them FOR MYSELF. I don’t mean to sound cocky but at the end of the day every fic i have ever posted is just me filling my own imagination in a self indulgent way. They’re all the same because they’re all things I like??? Things I want to read??? No offense, but unless I am filling a requests, you’re GONNA SEE jk college au. jk boyfriend. jk dom/sub. jk this and this. Why? Because it’s my blog and I post what I like.

2. If you don’t like my fics.... don’t read them? I am not holding you at gunpoint to read these fics nor is anyone else. If you appear on my blog to complain about my fics ... okay?? I’m not gonna change them lmao. You’re not the target audience, so move along.

But truthfully speaking, this is not the main reason I am making this post. Do I care what people online think about my fics? Mmm not really. Writing fics is something I do in my free time as a hobby. I’ve never wanted to do this professionally lmao. I do it for fun when I’m bored or procrastinating. I have other hobbies I do too. I journal i paint i play soccer I listen to music. I frankly am not offended when people critique my work, especially not when they chose to do it through an anonymous message.

What DOES offend me is when people abuse the anonymous option to be spiteful and hateful, and use my ethnic background against me... OVER KPOP. OVER FAN FIC ABOUT KPOP.

Am I offended about the first part of the ask? No I don’t care. What I am disgusted and disturbed by is that you have been blatantly racist and ignorant not only to ME but to ALL OTHER POCS with the second half of your message. Being a POC writing for BTS is bad?? What do you prefer I write about? Shawn Mendes? Niall Horan? I’d rather choke. What do you even mean??? Am I supposed to write Can fic for completely unproblematic people?? Give me an example?? Furthermore, I am not black so for you to come in here and disrespect black people with your last comment is immature, disgusting, and racist. Go to hell.

I deleted the message. I always delete excessively rude messages. I was hoping it was a one time occurrence but nope. A few hours later.

My status as an undocumented immigrant is something I have shared on tumblr because it is my safe space and somewhere where no one in real life knows me. Did you think this was funny? Did you think I actually laughed? I didn’t. I won’t lie. This ask terrified me. You’re threatening to call ICE on me.... OVER KPOP? OVER FAN FICS OF KPOP? How old are you. How immature do you have to be to take it this far.

I deleted this message and turned off anon. I am not gonna let some anonymous grey sunglasses orb abuse the anonymous option like this. Honestly, I knew another message was bound to follow up and it did 🤗

thanks for showing me your face, doll. I reported your account and so did a bunch of friends of mine. It’s funny that you mention writing better content but your blog is only ten posts? 9 of which are reblogs of fan fics? What do you write babe? What do you do? Where do you post? As I’ve said before I frankly don’t care for writing advice, this is just a hobby. But if you’re going to claim you’re some modern day Shakespeare maybe have the proof to back it up. Also your first posts says you’re a black woman, but your first ask to me says POC shouldn’t enjoy BTS.... honey all your posts are about BTS. So what’s the truth? Do we enjoy them or not? Next time you feel some type of way towards me as a Mexican woman, don’t start off by hiding behind anon until I force you off, don’t disrespect me or other POCs, and don’t use a burner account like you did. And for the record. I barely believe you’re black, and honestly speaking, everything about your asks have racist undertones only a white person could carry out.

Anyway. I am posting this because I want to highlight just how difficult it is to be a POC in this fandom. Army preach about being this or being that. We love each other. We look out for each other. ARMY is family blah blah blah.

No we’re not.

I have been an ARMY since 2015. The only places I have ever found comfort within this fandom are with other POCs, and even then it is only a few people here and there. This random ass hoe that I have NEVER interacted with before decided to take the fact I am a POC and taunt me, attack me, harass me, whatever you want to call it, and didn’t come off anon until I forced them off.

I am so beyond tired of being a POC in this fandom. When will you all recognize that one “I stand by” post is never enough to support us. “I can’t be racist I support BTS’s message💜” shut the hell up. You kiss these men’s feet for being your woke kings but then turn around and say things like this. Was it fun? Was it cool parading around in your ‘I do whatever BTS does’ cloak? You guys pick and choose when you want to be a model ARMY, and then turn around do things like this. Over kpop. Your allyship means nothing when there are still people like this in fandom who try to bully me OVER KPOP. OVER JUNGKOOK. OVER A MAN WE DONT KNOW AND NEVER WILL KNOW.

Please don’t interact with this person. Please just block and report them.

Anon’s gonna be off for a while, thanks for reading.

[lochnessies]

I’m sorry? Would it have been better if I went into OP’s asks as an anon to harass them??? How dare I reply to them because they literally posted in a ‘critical‘ tag??? Is this what you folks call ‘attacks’ now? I hear folks post in this tag how people like me are apparently despicable performative leftists for liking Edelgard. So I do not see how anything I said was so egregious.

an anon sent an ask to me to send positive vibes to the op. that’s literally all i did. i didn’t accuse you of anything. hell, i didn’t even reblog from you bc i did not care about the discourse. please don’t put words from someone else’s mouth into mine. i cannot and will not speak for an anon since idk who they are.

i also like edelgard and don’t post in the critical tag so i’m not making any judgements of you as a person or your politics. i simply dont care.

in my eyes you didn’t say anything egregious that’s why i didn’t involve myself on the post. i mean, did i agree? nah. but nothing you said was The Worst Thing I’ve Ever Heard you know? and on my separate post i wasn’t talking about you lol i was talking about the other person who gave a response to you (which has now been deleted) because i thought it was rude and mean spirited of them to call you an idiot over a bunch of pixels no matter if i agree with your take or not.

have a good day and a happy new year! ✨

[btsandvmin]

Hey i m the anon who wrote about shipwars and being petty. I didnt mean it as u were being petty or starting shipwars. Infact i understand your reaction. Not long ago i saw one of the other ship blogs that totally butchered vmin's relationship by saying tae is recently being passive agressive to jimin and so jimin is keeping distance from him and stuff. It made me so angry that i left a choice reply to that blogger. What i meant was not many people have the reading comprehension to understand that your post was about why you ship vmin and why you think they could be real. I just didnt want ji/kookers to come at your blog. Please dont feel disheartened. You and your blog are very valued. Your one of the most level headed and well rounded person.

Thank you for writing me again to clarify. It's really difficult to know someone's intentions sometimes through text and I am already quite sensitive about this topic and thus am more likely to take it in a negative way.

So yes, reading comprehension can easily lead to a reaction and end result that might differ from intent... I know this is a general problem. But that being said I think Ji/kookers who wants to be rude or attack me will do so and come at me either way. While the nice ones will try to understand what I mean. And I don't mind having to explain it if someone asks nicely.

I also try my best to not end up in their tag, so they would have to come searching for it to see it. But thank you for your concern and thank you for your kind words. It means a lot to me.

[officialinvisibleanon]

((...huh. So I've kinda been wondering.))

*hm?*

((How has Lyra not been suspicious of anything?))

*what do you mean?*

((Well, she's seen her world become a barren landscape for months, until a stranger who knows way too much about her contacts her and offers to fox the world for her.))

*well, I see how that's weird but I don't see how it's suspicious.*

((Not done. Anyways, they go steal a diamond with a wormhole in it, stumbling across Lyra's girlfriend who didn't remember being gone. This makes Lyra have like, a panic attack or something.))

*...okay now I'm interested. Please continue.*

((So Inviz promises to explain everything, but later all he.can come up with is the truth.))

*that the world is a story made up by people on the internet?*

((Yeah. And it makes him sound crazy. But what I'm not getting is why Lyra didn't believe him on the spot.))

*...why? You said it just now. The truth sounds insane.*

((I mean, yeah. But the population was suddenly removed from reality and brought back inexplicably as soon as she started doing things. She met a seemingly alien stranger who knew way too much about her and was clearly the smartest person she's ever seen- meaning that the stuff he knew about the universe, he probably KNEW. For a fact.))

*that last bit sounds like patting yourself on the back but continue.*

((Plus- the anons, which she probably only knows as omnipotent beings from another universe, told her that Inviz was right.))

*...maybe denial? Knowing that the universe isn't real can take a toll on a person.*

((Not likely. We recently learned that she wouldn't care. Y'know, that whole "if I was im the matrix I would still have to go to work tomorrow" philosophy.))

*huh. Well maybe we can just ask Grace-*

((NO! That would be rude. Her creative decisions are her own.))

*jeez okay fine I wasn't forcing you to*

*wait...*

((What?))

*is this thing on?*

((WHAT???))

*Oh shOOT YOU PROBABLY DONT WANT THAT*

((HOW TO I CANCEL IT I HAVENT BEEN ON TUMBLR FOR LIKE 5 MONTHS))

*JUST HIT THE TOP ONE I THINK???*

((Oh good. This one?))

*yea- wait NO WAIT-*

[jankybones]

hey i just want to say i'm a huge fan and i have a lot of respect for your talent. as a fan, i want to say that the way you responded to that last anon was a little off putting. i understand that it's annoying because it sounded like they were invalidating you and i completely get that it pissed you off. i get it. however, i think that instead of insulting them it would help if we all taught instead of calling people out. i really don't want to sound like im attacking you, just making a point

Hi thanks for enjoying my stuff. I don't typically react like that to people, and especially if they arent being intentionally rude to me. I've been creating content online and browsing since I was 11.

I know how to take care of people commenting like this. Ignore them, and dont care. Ive been not-caring for years, years, and years.

And honestly, no, some random dumb person hiding behind anon did not upset me by calling me female. I responded in a way that made myself laugh, and would just shut them down. Because those words, that "lol", they knew what they were doing. They were poking on purpose.

I dont owe anyone my kindness or patience. I provide it as much as possible, because I love you guys and believe in being kind as a default for myself. But I don't need to let people walk all over me, either.

That response definitely did stray from my usual Brand of how I talk to people, but honestly it was just funny imo. Its also not my responsibility to teach rude anons anything about identities and gender, please understand that.

I'm not a public figure, and I'm not wanting to be anyone's teacher unless someone asked me kindly and genuinely if they wanted to know something.

So thanks for your message, I totally understand what you mean! But I don't think Im hurting that anons feelings anymore than they were trying to hurt mine.

I'm a person. I'm just a random artist wanting to live my life, I know my identity, I know what I want. I don't need validation from that anon, and again, they did NOT actually upset me. I hope you guys understand that I'm just a regular stressed out human trying to get by and getting constant weird/rude anons, it's nothing new to me. I'm constantly blocking and ignoring. Its fun to respond to their rudeness with equal rudeness every once in a while.

[starfaring-princelotor]

Um ah you dont have to do this but a fix where the reader has a fixation over lotors voice. Idk how this would actually come up in a conversation with him. (He'd probably over hear the conversation ) -On a side note that man has the most magnificent voice i would ever wish to hear.

Dear anon, thank you for such lovely compliments in regards to my voice. I hope when you read this, you can hear my baritone words tickling your ears. I regret to inform you that this piece of fiction came out to be more fluffy than expected. If you were expecting smut, I apologize in advance.

Originally posted by fudayk

Thunder

Pairings: Lotor x Reader

★ Disclaimer: I do not ship Lotura and I respectfully ask that this story to not be tagged as Lotura. This is a Lotor x Reader/Self-Insert OC story which is in no way related to Allura at all. Please be respectful of my chosen pairing.  ★

Prince Lotor was like thunder, in every sense except literal. The commander was firm in his actions, resolute that his plans, his ideas, his orders, would be followed with little to no resistance. At least, that’s how it has always been on his ship. No one disobeyed or argued against him or voiced their disagreements. There were two reasons you noticed why: one, those that questioned him have often gone missing. And two? His voice did not waver in the slightest.

Perhaps, that was why you were scared of him. You were good at your job post, yes, but that didn’t mean you did not feel a trickle of fear when he stepped by you or sat on his command seat to overlook the deck. Was fear even the right word? You respected him, like any other crew member. Trusted him to overlook your safety as well as his own. Maybe the reason why you were truly scared of him was because he was the physical embodiment of your biggest childhood fear: the sound of rolling thunder.

Yet, there was a thrill when Prince Lotor spoke, like seeing an oncoming storm. His eyes flashed lightning, his voice warned of the approaching thunder. It both excited and scared you. Perhaps, you can even say…it aroused you to an extent. Such conflicting emotions did not go unnoticed by the Prince, however, and maybe it was out of pure curiosity that lured him to follow you around. Discreetly, of course.

At first, he started humming. You could hear him from across the hallway wherever you turned. It gave you shivers up and down your spine, but your ears, oh, they adored the sound. The tune reverberated so wonderfully, it made you waver in your steps. It even made you hitch your breath in odd anticipation. Lotor’s voice was like a haunting melody following your every move, from the moment you awoke to the time you slept.

Next, came the direct orders. Normally, there was a chain of command for the grunts. It’d usually be Acxa speaking to your supervisor, then your supervisor passing down the demands. But the gracious Prince Lotor has sought you out personally lately. You would stand stock still, straight up like a true soldier, and feel your heart’s pace quicken in your chest. Much to Lotor’s amusement, he would see your eyes flick quickly to his lips, those lips caging his deep, baritone voice.

“Soldier, what is the status of the damage done in sector 88-E?” his voice held no inflection of his real intentions, but that didn’t stop him from noticing your lower lip quiver just a bit.

“Sire,” you cleared your throat, trying to dislodge that nervousness stuck in there, “T-The sector will be repaired within the next hour. There were no casualties from the attack.”

“Very good. That will be all. Return to your post.”

You gulped and let out a shaky sigh. How the bloody hell would you ever get over this…this…fixation? Eventually, this problem began showing up in your work performance. Simply put, you had a hard time sleeping, for every time you shut your eyes, you could hear his alluring voice. It kept you up until the late hours of night and plagued your dreams in the best of ways. It was…unhealthy.

That’s how you found your exhausted self set on auto-pilot. There was always something that needed fixing in this ship, so you occupied your time with repairing and checking systems. A tweak here, adjustments there. It was mind numbing, but very welcome in comparison to a certain Prince’s voice. However, the silence would not last forever, and quite soon you heard the tell-tale signs of that cursed humming. You swayed slightly when the bane of your existence turned a corner, those footsteps only adding to his ominous approach.

“Soldier, what ever are you doing up so late? You should be in the barracks with the rest,” he asked flippantly, though if you strained your ears, perhaps you could have heard the pinch of concern.

But yes, he did take note of your tired appearance. Heavy eyes, slouching form, sluggish movement. No, certainly this would not do. His soldiers must be in tip-top form, regardless of how amusing it was to watch you squirm when he so much as whispered a single word. You didn’t know this, but he could hear your heartbeat quicken. He could even…smell the arousal between your legs. It was fun toying with you for the time being.

He was a captain above all, so if his crew had a problem, he would help in any way he could.

“My apologies, your…majesty,” you yawned, a hand coming up to cover your mouth, “I’ve been having difficulty staying asleep. I figured that some work could help with my problem.”

Lotor stood taller now, gazing down at you and studying every word that left your mouth, “And what is this problem, soldier?”

Now, your eyes widened a smidgen and you stared up at him in hesitancy. Your lips remained shut in a firm line, unsure how to exactly tell him that the problem was literally standing in front of you. A few seconds of silence filled the void while Prince Lotor waited patiently for your answer and you know if you didn’t give him one soon, you would be demoted…or worse. Sent away.

“Speak.”

“I-ah, I’m afraid of…” you flushed in shame, eyes flicking down to stare at his chest plate, “…Thunder. Sire.”

He raised an elegant brow, demanding you expand a bit more. Yes, he knew you had a fascination with his voice. Though, he had not realized it affected you so deeply. Lotor saw you swallow in anxiousness, but he had a gut feeling that you weren’t nervous because of his commanding status. You were nervous of him pulling out these confession from you. This admittance of yours was not the norm among his soldier’s gossip. This was a struggle you deemed fit to handle alone. A common mistake.

You worried your bottom lip, shoulders hunching slightly as if to shrink into yourself, “And you do have a…forgive my rudeness, but your voice is thunderous at times. I am a little afraid of it.”

You decided to keep the part about being turned on out of that confession.

“Hmm, that will certainly not do,” he folded his hands behind his back, “Come with me, soldier.”

Fuck, he was going to send you off. That shame built up tenfold and you silently followed him, feeling the strong urge to just cry. This was your post, your home now. You almost wanted to beg him not to relocate you. Drop to your knees and plead. When you looked up, your captain was…sitting on the floor? Against the wall? You blinked owlishly in confusion, the scene actually made you think you were dreaming. Or delusional.

“Come here, soldier,” he ordered again, but this time he patted his chest, “I will not harm you. I believe this can help with soothing your fears.”

You did as you were told, moving to sit besides him with your legs splayed out in front of you. His were…so much longer, admittedly. Lotor cleared his throat, getting your attention as he waited in expectation. Right. His chest. You shifted awkwardly and laid your head on him, a little cautious just in case you would anger him with how close you were to your commanding officer. Nothing of the sort happened, but you did feel a large hand come up to hold your shoulder as a way to steel you against him.

And then, he started humming. Low enough that not only could you hear the thunder rolling over your ears, but you could also FEEL it vibrate through his chest plate. The rumble made you instantly tense and Prince Lotor noticed almost immediately. He started casually rubbing his hand up and down the length of your arm in hopes to calm you down from your rising anxiety. It did help that he was also so very warm to lean against, so warm like a bonfire in the deepest corners of space.

“Fret not, for I shall not hurt you,” Lotor spoke in a rare, gentle tone, one you didn’t think a man with such a voice was capable of, “Rest now, soldier. Let the thunder guide you to a land of pleasant dreams. Let my song calm the fears in your soft heart, let me chase away the dark clouds forming in your mind. Permit me your soul, so that I may share my voice for your protection.”

Prince Lotor peered down at you and felt a small ounce of pride swell in his chest when he saw you already deep in slumber.

[heartshapedracetrack]

You dont like bayern ?

Good morning anon,

Nope, I really don’t like Bayern and tbh i think it’s part of german culture by now to just dislike them. I have my reasons though and I will explain them to you under the cut if you’re interested :)

What I really want to add though is that I don’t mind most people that are bayern fans (I love my mutuals and some of them are almost solely Bayern fans) I respect every choice of club that you follow if you are civil about it (NO HATE POSTS OR UGLY NICKNAMES) god knows there are also people who hate the clubs that i support sjkghfjdg and that’s totally fine!

Okay first of all every person has their clubs they absolutely can’t stand, mostly because they are your team’s rivals ( for me it’s Mönchengladbach, Leverkusen, Düsseldorf and Arsenal –> As a Köln Fan and a Spurs fan it’s just never going to happen sorry)

Bayern though is a totally different story. Bayern to Germany is like the US to Europe. If you are Fan of any other Bundesliga team chances are very high that you dislike Bayern. I guess it’s a natural reaction to the last years of Bayern winning everything and the way the club just acts in general.

For me it’s mostly the entitlement and arrogance of the club and some of their fans. 

I don’t want to be rude but as someone who had to watch their team play the worst season in HISTORY last year ending with them getting relegated, having to see Bayern fans complain how much they are suffering because of their team irks me a bit. ( i mean we all like to exaggerate a bit but still… in terms of football experiences.. losing one game is not suffering ( try 14 in a row)

There’s also Hoeneß and he’s reason enough to not like Bayern tbh. 

Tax Fraud CHECK

Opening his mouth when he shouldn’t and acting like an asshole? CHECK

The fact that Bayern thinks they have nothing to do with the fact that the Bundesliga is not competetive anymore is reason number 3 i don’t like them.

Because that is simply not true. They said  the other clubs need to step up their game. ( look okay everyone is trying but what is the point when you buy all the good player afterwards anyway?)

And before anyone comes into my inbox to says: But dortmund is doing it too , every club buys players from other teams, it’s how it works)

It’s not the same, because Bayern has a monopoly. There’s no equilibrium of transfers. It’s not one player arrives and one player goes to another club in the bundesliga. No it’s like they attract players like light attracts moths. It’s the fact that they ALL go to bayern and therefore strenghtening the strongest team further while weakening the opponents.

(Süle, Rudy, Hummels, Goretzka, etc… Kovac…..) 

Just to make it clear, I don’t blame anyone for it. It’s only logical that players would want to go to bayern. You get money and you play champions league and have a guarantee for trophies and titles. It’s just the way it is. It’s a vicious cycle. 

It’s just the fact that they have the audacity to say “LOL okay we have nothing to do with it , it’s everyone elses fault.”

Reason number 4 ( 5? i lost count kjhsfdj)

Not being aware of the fact that they do have a bayern bonus sometimes (not always but sometimes) during games and then act like they were betrayed when the ref acts not in their favor during championsleague games ( *cough* Real Madrid *cough*) Talk about hypocrisy. 

Then there’s the fact that I just really don’t like their players ekfjdkj ( maybe 2 or 3 but the rest .. nahhh)

The fact that Bayern is the only thing german football media likes to talk about. Other clubs apparently don’t exist and that is really annoying. ( this is also a shout out to our dear Nationalteam :’))

Last but not least the overall feeling that they don’t take the Bundesliga seriously at all. The overall feeling that the club thinks they are too good for the league ( it might be true but acting like it makes you arrogant).

So that’s it and I’m sorry for the rant skjdghjfhg and it’s in no way an attack to Bayern supporters in general. Everyone has their reasons to love or hate a team and you are valid :* 

It’s just the way it is but i do want to keep this blog mostly hate free so please don’t come and attack me in my inbox. It’s just my opinion and i don’t mind seein them on my dash or whatever.

Lots of Love *heart emoji*

[yandereskies]

This problem seems like it could take a turn for the worst so i need to address this before it does.

Ok, i understand both sides of this issue but please dont try and make an argument about issues people may have. The reason i responded to the first "Genderswap concern" ask was because it was an issue i wanted to address myself and clarify that i had no intentions of seeming transphobic.

Though i wish that i didnt have to explain that (even though im happy to explain and work with others who may be uncomfortable by it, i am so sorry if that seems mean.) I dont agree with those people who bring up those concerns being labeled SJWs.

I want to address things like this with no insults or rude words being exchanged. Want these things to be addressed with understanding and hope to clerify why i do what i do.

I dont want anyone on either side of the argument to be insulted, attacked, or shamed for thinking the way they do.

If any of you have concerns you wish to send me or respones to other anons then please be civil. Anything that is rude or insulting to another person's viewpoint unnecessarily WILL be deleted.

Any arguments on this blog i REALLY dont want to turn toxic, i want this to be a friendly space.

Thank you for reading this and i hope you all understand

Have a nice day! And remember to spread as much positivity as you can! Good attitudes can spread!

[floralkittygambler]

Return of The Thing

Sort of. By thing, I mean me. But I love this movie and the meme. Ok, context for this post: - Where I’ve been - Why I left - Whats hip happening -  Where I’ve Been:

Long story short, I’ve had real life matters to deal with. Firstly, my entire household contracted COVID. Well, *almost*. We’ve been through constant testing, quarantine zones, and had the ambulance up numerous times. My parents and 2nd oldest sister were hit the hardest. My 3rd oldest sister was positive and asymptomatic. Now something none of us could predict that I would be completely COVID free despite my compromises. Despite that I was in close contact with them all, including the 2nd oldest who contracted it first and accidentally being coughed on a few times lol. I went through the exact same testing and yet nothing. No symptoms. No presence of COVID. And I took no precaution to isolate from my family as I presumed in our small house we’d all get it, so I was more preoccupied with caring for the sick. Ultimately, I’ve either gotten off scott free this time or there’s a chance I may actually either be highly resistant or even immune. Even then, I WILL be having the vaccine as and when my family are eligible. And we all still follow regulations set.  I’ve also had other real life obligations, much of it either mundane fixing up my living circumstances to more personal matters. Overall, I have been extremely preoccupied.

A mini update, the stray cat Big has been in our porch a lot more in recent times due to the snow as well as being even more affectionate. And Queefster passed away after a good life and a full tummy. Why I Left:

Aside from COVID, business, and my own health declining, I’ll be blunt. I left because of how disgustingly toxic most fandoms are nowadays, but Hazbin is one of the WORST for it. That includes harassment, death threats, mocking MI and triggering an ED. In fact, I’ve even seen others get rape and death threats. So yes, even if YOU are a decent fan, collectively most of you arent doing any favours. Even some critical blogs seem to be overtly catty in ways no one else seems to pick up on under this ‘look how blunt I am’ look and it’s just... You dont have to be a prick to have your say, to be honest and to disagree with the trending. That’s a few on and off of tumblr, and no one I follow anyways. 

In regards to my ‘sensitivities’ - two things: 1) Of course trauma is going to hurt, 2) Im fully aware of kids doing and receiving much of this, which hurts MORE. I have my own lil squids and Im worried of them eventually having to deal with this shit. And no, no one SHOULD have to put up with such rude and poor behaviour. Agree to disagree doesnt live in some people’s realities, but by God harassment and bullying seems ok if YOURE doing it or enticing it. That ISNT ok. Even if it seems like nothing to you it could kill another. I certainly will not take your shit. 

On huskerdust I STAND by my words. It’s fucking creepy and there is sexual harassment and obsession. And there are large triggers. I will not go into detail here because Ive done that dance before and I’ll be refining it again. YOU may like it, however it triggers my very real traumas as well as those in my bloodline. Be respectful and keep that shit away from me. And for goodness sake, parents PLEASE dont raise your children to behave as such online. And no, being anon isnt actually fully anonymous. Also to send hate and threats anon is not only traceable but also cowardice. Grow a pair and find a hobby. I avoid my traumas for the most part. I will not allow you to weaponise or diminish my own or others experiences for your fictional based gratification. Likewise, if it becomes canon, I’ll just make an AU where it is not. Simple. You can hate it but Im not your personal circus so go be toxic elsewhere. IF you like HD and follow me, honestly... Youre probably better to unfollow as I am deeply and passionately against it and stolitz, and valvox, and am very vocal on that. Dont mistake my traumas and discomfort as a personal attack - and dont personally attack me over it either. And before anyone claims homophobia, no. This is nothing to do with sexuality. You arent the victim. If you love these pairings with your soul to the point of a ‘stan’, then youre best off unfollowing because I really am too old for extremists and rabid fans more crazed than the infected in REC. Also I never used to hate angel but now... Fans behaviour is abhorrent and hes so over saturated that I honestly really dislike him now. Doesnt mean you have to hate him too, but just bloody respect that angel isnt loved by all, he can be triggering to some as well as toxically enabling [incl. past addicts], a vile homophobic gay stereotype and just overall a lack of knowledge and respect of sex workers as a whole. When you know a lot of the ins and outs and victims, it’s hard to overlook. I respect your triggering ships by avoiding that mess. Respect others.  The problem with Viv - and I will elaborate in the future - is that your audience is often a reflection of your work and it’s message/presentation. And most of the fandom Ive met are awful. Honestly, though lonesome I find more comfort keeping distant from fandoms because yall often extremely toxic and petty. Perhaps others have had better experiences than I however Im drawing a line in the sand. For MY sake. I’m annoyed with virtually anyone I sense great potential in that becomes wasted. Im angry at Viv because she can do so much better but is blocking HERSELF. This is from a creative and business mindset. When someone has potential that gets wasted - especially creatively - it burns me. Im just passionate on artistic fields. It doesnt mean I hate them. I hate the waste of full potential.

I’ll state things here people disagree with but encouraging harassment, hate or just being an overall cunt just aint on- It’s like people charade as being this fair being but its all bullshit. Self improve and sod off, I do NOT have time to parent you online. 

And obviously there are RL duties I must fulfil. Some in which I will need the publics assistance for if you can spare it. Overall, Im just... Fandoms behaviour generally disgusts me. Disappoints me. We SHOULD be better than this. It’s like listening to bloomin incels rant on fuckin chad or some bullshit pill theory instead of looking to improve themselves too. Honestly... I do mostly acknowledge my own flaws and faults and try to improve each day. It just feels fewer folk see that in themselves and do the same. And that’s coming from an old cunt whos far from fuckin perfect. Also, my fuckin laptop broke so I waited a week for a bloke nearby to fix it. What a fuckin lifesaver, he’s the real mvp!

Also Also, one of you did privately apologise and I appreciate that. I certainly hope we agree to disagree and continue to grow as people on our separate ways. Trust me, I dont forget small acts like this. Even the trauma that caused and the aftermath, please dont think I dont appreciate the apology. However you’re also entitled to know that the forgiveness and healing side may take longer for me due to various factors that occurred - much that few are aware of, including yourself especially. I wish you well and safety.

Hip Happenin Now:

Still busy but slowly visiting. I’ll reply and reblog soon, be patient please. Ive still many things to sort which take priority as well as other things. Im trying to get money n shit for a future and whatnot. Health issues are strong in the blood rn and Im spending extended time with both Big and the other pets to keep up harmony, especially now that Big is accepting slowly that our porch is a welcome shelter for him and he’s free to leave and stay whenever. Trust me, overloaded isnt even the word. Im prepping shit early this year and from now on. Also, my God Ive been dealing with more physical issues as well and had to play doctor. May even need medical interference but holy shit I could never see this coming. Still... It’s... An experience- If you could call it that. Staying more active and healthy. Cat’s nearly clawed my eye out in my sleep (to which I can only presume Billy got too close or hyper) but it’s fortunate placement so Im alright. Most of my body is in pain to the point of absolute normality at this rate. And I plan to make space for a better altar. Future of the Blog: 

Errr, it’s my fuckin space so it’s whatever I want really. Ill still have my Viv rants (ie, pros and cons of her work, HH/HB, other shit like that) however I just really dislike most the fandom at this point as well as the poor management and lack of professionalism and attitudes of staff. It’s just draggin me down and making me ill. I also want to showcase more of MY work (from redesigns to projects to some dumb 2am shit), cosplays, fashion, hobbies, spiritual practises - MY. SHIT. I feel like Ive strayed slightly. But I WILL be honest. And damn well will it upset people. And if it does and I’m genuinely ding something wrong/harmful - guide me patiently. Educate me. If it’s like this HD shit where Im not only allowed my opinions but justified on my traumas or mocking my disabilities or features, then just yeet yourself elsewhere. Also some of my gaming shit too. Getting to know folk who interact with my stuff and just... Create my space. For me. Something hopefully others can enjoy. Something that can function as a bit of an art portfolio as well. Critiques and whatnot.  But I will continually not stand for anyone’s shit or poor handling of serious matters. You will not cause me to doubt and invalidate my experiences like you have to others.  For now, Im tottering but slowly returning. For those who I previously and daily interacted with, I will get back to you. And Im sure you’re patient and understanding of my situation - it’s appreciated. But in terms of any fandom, more so if it’s known to be as hostile, I’d rather keep a healthy boundary between us. That’s for newer folk. Perhaps we may bond further and you’re welcome to try, however I do feel far safer not getting involved into other people’s shit any longer. I will put anon back on but any toxic shit will be reported as well as compiled so at least I have a reference on the actual toxic nature of fandoms. Likewise, Im slowly getting there but god theres a lot of fuckin work. So much that not even my closest friend has heard too much from me until recently. I’ll be returning to the grind for now as I have duties, as well as many demanding felines for my attention. Alongside some physical medical concerns which require additional care, I’ll be popping off now.  Im thankful for those who have checked in on me. I will reply shortly. Take care

[gontagokuhara]

“hey connor, what the hell is happening with jump?

+aka, for those of you looking for answers.

fair warning this is a very long story, and it isn't a very nice one. for the sake of not being a huge asshole, i'll refrain from mentioning the other party by name/url/ao3 handle/whatever, because i'd rather not send the dogs after this person like they were for me.

and to those of you who have been following me since mid-to-late august (around when this whole thing started) (and, coincidentally, when jump became the most popular fic in the dear evan hansen tag on ao3, but we'll ignore that little detail), you might know who the other person is in this whole situation. i know most of my friends do, and for my friends and otherwise please don't go after this person. don't reblog with their name or fic title or whatever, because the point of this post is to serve as an explanation for why jump is going down, not start a manhunt for this other person.

i digress.

around mid-august, i began receiving comments and a few asks regarding a chapter of jump (28, to be specific). in essence, they were saying that i had "ripped off" a certain plot point of a certain fic, which. to be honest i didn't think a whole lot of? because the messages i received didn't say anything about what i had ripped off, just that i had done it.

it came to a point where i messaged the author of this other fic and briefly explained the situation, and made my case. i got a response sometime the next day and it wasn't one i was hoping for.

which, of course, i've accepted that at this point - people think i did plagiarize. the author of the other work thinks that i did. i know that i didn't, but i need to acknowledge and accept that a lot of people think i did.

what i didn't accept was the "term" i was given - to put a note on the chapter in question crediting this author for the "original idea."

which, you know, was offensive to me - because jump had always been my idea. despite what was being said, i knew that i hadn't read the sections of the other fic that i was accused of stealing, before i had published my own chapter. so i couldn't have taken the idea, if that makes sense?

i didn't respond to the other author's message, and that was wrong of me. i know that that was shitty of me to not offer a response, and there isn't really an excuse for that? but it happened, and it was shitty, but.

for the most part, things quieted down for a bit when i posted chapter 29, and i rather naively assumed that things had permanently gone quiet. i'd made an incredibly long statement in the end notes of the chapter, and i said that if anyone wanted to say anything further they could feel free to pm me, because it was counterproductive to yell arguments at each other through my inbox. funnily enough, no one took that offer and messaged me, but i can't say i'm surprised. without the shield of anon, people tend to not disagree so violently.

after 30 got posted, however, things sort of exploded.

immediately people took it upon themselves to leave nasty comments and asks in my inbox, which hurt but at this point i had come to expect it from the whole situation.

sometime after that, the callout was posted.

which, of course, made me freak the fuck out.

what was worse was that i found it on accident; someone reblogged a post of mine with something nasty and i was confused so i checked their blog, and. well.

it had the title of my fic all over it, it was in the main tags, and i knew immediately when asks started piling up that none of them were going to be good. and they weren't. i haven't gotten death threats a whole lot, but that day was definitely a peak in me receiving them.

there was.....a lot in the callout, and it took me a good few hours to get myself to a state where i could read it without freaking out again.

this was early on in the post, where i was accused of shot for shot rewriting sections of a certain chapter of this other fic, when, again, i hadn't read it until chapter 28 was posted and chapter 30 was long since drafted and in the process of being written, but. (the bit of the sentence that is cut off reads "however, as the author of [fic], chapters 28 and 30 read like-")

note how no proof of this is provided, or anything beyond the chapter numbers.

this next bit is from the pm i received from them, and it's interesting in how it reflects the author's...i dont know how to describe it. i suppose arrogance is the best word i can find? for them to insinuate that their work is so well known enough that even if people haven't read it, they'd know about it.

(cut off sentence: “at the very least, the final chapters of [fic] are pretty-”)

the same sentiment is reflected here, in the callout.

the callout also points out that there's no indication of where i got the plot for jump, and that's because i made up the plot. the idea to kickstart the story i got from a prompt blog (here, if you're interested) and it states very explicitly in its terms of submission (here) that anyone submitting an idea for a prompt gives full permission to anyone to use it, credit unnecessary.

so that isn't exactly a 'gotcha!' point.

the last bits of the callout talk about me being rude to fans and making vague posts on tumblr, which. no proof provided so i, again, have no idea what they constitute as rude or vague.

it was.....a lot. and i had no idea what to do. i was scared, and i didn't know how to deal with having the fans of some 26 year old coming after me like that. i shut off anon, and i took a break of a day or so from tumblr, and that was pretty much that?

until two weeks ago, when i received this email from archive of our own:

so, things had obviously escalated. things had moved from calling me out publicly, to moving to get my work deleted. it messed me up pretty bad, and for a while i was freaking out.

after a day or so, a few of my close friends (one of which who has had prolonged access to both the jump writing document and the planning document) and i emailed ao3 with our appeals. i don't currently have copies of my friends' appeals, and all that is in mine was essentially what i've said publicly, with a few mentions of previous incidents. after a two week wait period as they reviewed my appeal, i received this email last night:

it strikes me how again, it's said that i shot for shot (or rather, replaced synonyms and the like) took this fic, but then again i'm not given specific instances, and then in the same paragraph it mentions that "whether you intentionally plagiarized or did it subconsciously after reading their fic, you are still responsible for the content." i don't understand how i could have taken scenes one by one and replaced synonyms, but also "subconsciously" plagiarize?

and, better yet, how can i plagiarize something i hadn't read until after the accused chapter was posted?

let me just say that i don't know for certain it was the author that made the complaint, but i would bet a whole lot on that possibility. even if it wasn't them who made the claim, they have to be notified because it involves their work. so.

and that's essentially where we're at now. jump is being deleted on november 10th, one way or another. and i am so, so angry.

i understand wanting to protect one's work. it's the reason i've maintained my innocence, and appealed to ao3. i want to protect my work from accusations i know aren't true.

but to have something i've worked so hard on for nearly seven months ripped from my hands? it's not fair. it's quite honestly bullshit.

this isn't meant to convince any of you one way or another of what happened, because you can all think for yourselves. whether you believe me or not, at this point it doesn't matter, because jump has already been sentenced to its fate.

but i know what i did and didn't do. i wouldn't still be fighting this if i wasn't sure of my innocence.

i'm angry. i'm going to be angry for a long time. this whole situation has made me fucking hate even looking at my writing anymore. what would possess someone to go so far as to get my work deleted, i don't really know.

as the author has stated, no one really "owns" fanfiction. so what gives them the right to take my work away from me? my accomplishments?

i hold no ill will towards the other author, but i hate this situation and i hate what they've done. i hate that there is someone in their mid twenties out there who has taken it upon themselves to take away a 17 year old's passion project.

am i bitter? yes. and i'm not apologetic for it. i didn't plagiarize anyone in regards to jump, plain and simple. no matter what anyone else says, i know the truth, and the people i care about know the truth, and i can't do a thing about anyone else, so it doesn't really matter.

a few friends have asked for me to make jump available by other means, and i'm considering it. because even though the hits and comments will be deleted, as its always been, jump has been for my own enjoyment. for me to tell a story i think needed to be told. and just because it's being cut short doesn't mean it still isn't worth telling.

if i do make it available elsewhere, i'll let people know. but this is where i leave you for now.

like i said in the beginning of this stupidly long post, please don't go off and attack this author. i'm angry, but taking it out on them will do nothing. it will only make things worse. jump is being deleted, and no amount of nastiness will change that. so we may as all just be nice.

if any of you have anymore questions, feel free to message me or send me an ask. anything general or non-specific i'll answer in asks, but if you have anything you'd like clarification on in regards to specifics, please message me privately.

and. um. i guess that's it?

thanks for reading. i’m sorry. i wish they hadn’t taken it this far.

[heavenly-garden]

I know it's hard sometimes to look passed the negatives of tumblr, believe me I understand. The glitches and unecessary changes done to this site, the stupidity of tumblrs staff, maybe they try in their minds to do the best they can but they don't try enough, things are censored that don't need censoring and things that should be censored aren't. The miserable people that have blogs who make our tumblr experience even harder to enjoy, racists, homophobes, transphobes, the rude ones, the bitter hateful ones, the people who come to play with our minds and emotions for twisted amusement, upsetting and attacking people, not letting us enjoy the anon experience as it is meant to be enjoyed, and ofc alllllll the ridiculous amounts of porn bot sites, seriously tumblr clean your shit up, you let all this garbage build and now it's practically over flowing and people who are uncomfortable with porn bot blogs following their blogs are greatly agitated! me included. I want REAL followers, I do not want nasty porn blogs to follow me (I mean really nasty and dirty looking porn blogs, too graphic even for me and I've seen some shit lol, ewwwies. Just keep it away from me plz), no ddlg, no terfs, not ageplay. I don't want nasty kink and fetish blogs to follow me. It's my choice and my blog. Now for the positive part of this post, a reminder. I know there's a lot of nasty people and ugliness going on in the world, things are messed up...but we the people who see it and know it are fighting back to the best of our ability, trying not to let all that negativity touch our hearts , there are those of us who still care and aren't putting up with this shit, we need to look out for each other, stand up for each other, not everyone is your enemy. Community, unity is everything right now. Stop looking at color, look at the heart of the person, if they don't possess one then move on cuz some people are just giving up on themselves, throwing away their humanity and shunning the light, try to save them as best you can but dont waste too much energy on something you may not be able to change. I myself will never ever give up hoping for a better tomorrow. I will never stop believing, my faith is strong in humans, the good hearted humans. I choose to look passed the ugliness and only focus on the good. The ugly insides of people who are rotten to the core are being exposed and it will be dealt with in time, karma is coming for their ass, some of those people are already feeling the sting of it. Just please don't let the ugliness rub off on yourself, wash it off if it starts too, don't let it taint your beautiful shining heart that wants to heal, love, share kindness and compassion, let what holds you back from shining go. We are fighting for our humanity, the good in our souls, don't give up. The war is not over, we have a long way to go but eventually we will prevail, don't lose faith. Some may say they already have but think of faith this way...it's like a roller coaster, with peaks and valleys but it's never truly gone until you let the darkness take you and you never leave. The darkness isn't a bad place but there are aspects of it that can be if not dealt with. Deal with your emotions, your anger, recognize it for what it is then let it go. It's like choosing to sip poison daily if you keep holding on to all the anger and bitterness. Tumblr can be a nice place, there are lots of really nice people here. Keep looking, you will find them and when you do show acts other kindness, give compliments, talk to each other, really listen, don't wait to reply, open your heart and minds to new possibility, if you see others being bullied and wrongly treated don't just sit and do nothing but try not to fight hate with hate, we need to love each other, love can walk through fire without thinking, fight with love.

[midotakaism]

To the rude and annoying anon before, if you stopped liking tianshan because of people "like monica" who dont react to chapters without tianshan, shouldn't the same be said for the jianxi chapters too? A hell lot more people couldn't care less about tianshan -- does that mean you're gonna leave the entire fandom? I hope you do, we dont need little shits like you to ruin the mood of some of our bestest here on tumblr. Monica hun, ignore the little shit troll. SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK THOUGH!!!♡♡

(it took me an embarrassingly long time to type down this reply because i kept getting flustered by you calling me ‘hun’ and using my name but like, in the best way possible!! (*ﾉωﾉ) ….i blush way too easily, pls don’t judge me…………..anyway!!)

i actually woke up this morning feeling a bit ashamed of myself for replying to that message because, like you said, whoever sent it was obviously a troll: they didn’t actually care about what i do or do not post, they were just looking for someone to pick up a fight with or to start some drama, and the best way to deal with this kind of people is to ignore them, so i shouldn’t have given them any attention to begin with. i just hope they won’t go around making people feel bad or starting fights, that’s all that matters!!

im also gonna take the occasion to say my two (unwanted) cents on this whole shipping matter (sorry, anon!!), because i feel like it’s something that’s getting a bit out of hand. i personally don’t think it’s a problem, or inherently bad, or that it makes them less of a fan if someone ships only one of the two pairs, or if they like one more than the other. it’s not the case of 19 days for me, but i can honestly think of so many tv shows and manga where i liked only a couple of characters and ships and that i kept watching/reading just because of them. i don’t think there’s anyone who ever liked every single character and every single couple of every single thing they've ever watched or read in their life. one of the reasons why love triangles became so popular is because people have different tastes and enjoy different things: there are those who are going to like both options, but there are also those who will like only one of the two. we’re not talking about a love triangle here, but the principle is the same. in the end, we’re all enjoying 19 days and supporting old xian, albeit in different ways, and that’s what’s important

everything becomes problematic only when people start to bash the ship they don’t like or to send hate to people who don’t enjoy the same thing they do. we all have different tastes, and everyone should be free to blog about what they want without feeling like they have to please other people. the key here is to be respectful of each others. if you want to comment something about a ship you don’t like, by all means, do it, but make sure not to put it in the tags!! and if you see an opinion you don’t share, don’t attack that person: block them if their posts bother you too much, or if they appear too often in the tags, and follow blogs with contents that you like!! of course there are always going to be trolls and hateful people, but we shouldn’t let them ruin our enjoyment. maybe this is– overly optimistic?? or it sounds too condescending?? idk, but i’ve been around fandoms for– way too long probably, and this is really the best way to go to keep having a good time, at least in my opinion

it should also be pointed out that valid and constructive criticism is different from hate, but this is already too long, so let’s not go there. sorry again, anon!! you didn’t sign up for this mess of a reply…… anyway, thank you so much for the nice message!! ❤ it’s good to be back :’)