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stat1cstarz · 1 year

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One man’s trash is another man’s treasure ❁ཻུ۪۪♡

Vincent Sinclair x Fem!Reader ❁ཻུ۪۪♡

❁ཻུ۪۪♡ Warnings:Smut,P in V,oral,Vincent keeps his mask on, because I have a mask kink,Reader is shorter than Vincent, but no height or body type is mentioned, reader has female genitalia

❁ཻུ۪۪♡ Des:You take one of Vincent’s sweater, and try to refurbish it, but it doesn’t go as you expected…

Both you and Vincent loved his sweaters, they all looked the exact same, but some were newer than others. But they were the only shirts he wore, and you loved using them as well, either to sleep in, or to use as a heater, since they were always warm. His heat would regularly etch into the fabric of the clothes, no matter how many times you washed them. But due to your love for Vincent’s sweaters, you used your knitting skills, and made something out of it.

You did all the planning behind your lovers back, not knowing what he’d do if he found out that you damaged his favorite garment. You grabbed one of his pencils, etching an idea onto some paper, his sweater wasn’t to big on you, it was slightly baggy and reached your upper thigh. Perfect to turn into a two piece, a mini skirt and matching sweater, maybe you could put fishnet into some of the rips.

It was about a week later until you got to the knitting process, a few specks of blood decorated your skin, from pricking yourself with the sharp tip of the needle. And a few loose strings vined off the sweater, as well as a few shreds in the already old and delicate fabric. But it was finally finished, you checked the elastic first, before you thought about trying it on.

Once the garment seemed wearable, you went to try it on, you didn’t wanna change in the basement, just in case Vincent came back, and you knew he’d B line for the basement. He was on his weakly run with Bo, collecting body’s and cars of the people that ran upon the town and made the dumb choice to stay. Luckily for you, it took a while to get it done, it made it easier with two trucks, but their was still a lot to do.

You picked up the two piece, checking if the coast was clear, knowing that it was, you continued up the stairs. You pushed open the door, and locked it. You didn’t want Bo or Lester seeing you half naked, and you didn’t wanna deal with the wrath of your dangerous lover. You slipped off your t shirt and shorts, you didn’t have a bra on underneath, and you didn’t bring one either. But you were sure that the sweater would hide the goods from any peeping eyes, you slipped on the top first, it fit perfectly.

It was slightly loose around your chest, so it wasn’t suffocating you, but it wasn’t loose enough to make you appear frumpy. You were very proud of your work, next came the skirt, it was sexy yet adorable at the same time. It was high waisted and ended near your upper thigh, and the light color made your skin pop, and the tightness showed off the swell of thighs and ass. You almost wanted to show it to Vincent, maybe if he saw the end result, he wouldn’t care about the death of his clothing.

And by the time you made up your mind, you heard the door slam, one of them was home. You hoped it was both of them or just Vincent preferably. You unlocked the door to the bathroom, and quietly walked downstairs, you saw Vincent make his way to the basement, just as you thought. He didn’t seem to notice you, but that made the surprise much better. You made your way down to his workshop, stopping at the peak of the stairs.

You looked down at him, he had his coat off, only in his sweater,apron,overalls,boots,and satchel. He was currently fixing up the bloody wounds on a recent trespasser. You snuck down to him, walking up behind your lover, and tapping his shoulder. He slightly jumped, until he turned around, and noticed you. He almost didn’t notice that his sweater had been cut, he just thought it you were wearing the full peace.

You backed up slightly wanting to give him a full view, causing his face to flush, not in anger, but in adoration. You giggled at him, you’d been with this man for a while yet you can still get him nervous from the simplest things. It was quite amusing to you, being able to fluster a mammoth that kills people fora living, it was almost empowering to you.

“Hey baby, you’re not mad are you” you said softly, getting a bit closer and twirling his dark strands in between your fingers. He got undeniably hard. “I understand if you’re upset, and I can get rid of it if you want.” If he could speak,he would tell you that was the last thing he wanted. But due to his hatred of speaking, he could only use sign language for the time being.

‘No, keep it’ he signed fluidly.

He stuck his strong yet lanky arms out to you, sinking them around your lower half and tapping your right ass cheek. You jumped up, locking your legs around his hips, and wrapping your arms round his neck. He instinctively brought you over to his work bench that sat in the corner of his basement.

“I guess you like it?” You asked him, innocently.

He didn’t give a direct answer, but what you got was definitely better, he slipped his tongue in between your plump lips, groaning into your mouth. He slipped both hands under your top, getting ready to unclip your bra, until he felt two of your pebbled nipples grace his waxy fingers. He felt his tip leak pre cum just from it, he than lifted up your shirt, twirling your nipples in between his fingers.

He lifted up his waxy veil, revealing his scared mouth, and wrapping it around your sensitive buds. He sucked on them viciously, as his hands snaked down south and massaged your upper thigh. He gently nibbled at your puffy nipples until they were red and sore. And he didn’t stop until your breast were covered in his saliva, and once your swoll breast were soaked, he pulled up his computer chair. He sat directly in front of you, grabbing your waist and pulling you near him.

“Vincent” you said, as a fresh coat of arousal sheeted your pussy.

He slipped up your mini skirt, noticing the wet patch, he snuck his head closer to the patch, inhaling your musky scent. His favorite scent of yours, it almost rivaled with the perfume you wore everyday. ‘Fucking love you so much, how did I get so lucky’ he signed at you, as he slipped off your panties, letting it fall down the length of your legs.

His lips immediately connected to your lips, causing you to moan out loudly for him, as his blue eye stared up at your lewd face. Your name came out of your lips in a breathy and needy tempo, he then grabbed both of your hands, allowing you to place them in his mane. You tugged at the tangled strands, feeling some wax bump your fingers. “Fuck- Vince” .

He could tell how close you were, by how your hole was clenching around nothing, and how you were clutching his head in between your thighs. He added two of his fingers into the mix, roughly playing with your sensitive little nub, rubbing the nerves around in his fingers. Your salty release coated his chin and stubble, he quickly pulled away from you, licking off whatever he could reach, using his finger to scoop up the rest and lick it off his digits. ‘So sweet’ he said, almost groaning at the taste that he had grown to love.

He than picked you up, repositioning you across the desk, bending you over it. He got on his knees behind you, he was almost edging himself at this point. He admired your perfect shaped ass, kneeding the plump flesh. He gave some delicate kisses and nibbles onto the swelled flesh, watching it turn a shade of red from his adoration. Your release and his slobber coated it, making him feel a certain way about it, making him way harder, if that was possible.

He worked at his clothing, ridding himself of his apron and his overalls, dropping it to his knees. His cock was desperately trying to free itself from the confines of his boxers. He slipped himself out from the hole pocket in the front. He was to lazy to drop them as well, so the slit would have to work. “Vincent, need it please” you said, backing yourself up against him and trying to get him inside you.

He only kissed your head, before rutting against your hole, than sinking himself inside you. He watched your tightness swallow his girth as you moaned loudly. He wrapped his arms around your waist, before aiming right for your neck. He slowly humped you, his balls snug against your ass, as he attacked your neck. He quickened his pace, somehow driving himself deeper into your warmth. Your walls massaged his girth as his name left your mouth.

You heard the door slam shut once more, so he quickly put one of his hands over your mouth, as his teeth nibbled at the delicate cartilage of your ear, allowing you to hear all his groans and growls. He felt his orgasm bubble up inside him, but he wanted you to release before he did. He aimed right for your abused clit, vigorously rubbing it and rolling it in between the tips of his fingers.

You quickly released, letting your cum dribble down his fingers and your inner thigh, after a few more pumps he released deep inside you. He pulled out directly after, dropping his knees once more, holding you by the hips to make sure you didn’t move. He watched as your releases dripped down between your thighs, and smirked to himself. He only dressed himself, but left you in just the garment you made, not wanting you to ruin your panties.

He picked you up bridal style, laying you on the cot and than placing your head on his chest, allowing you to cuddle up to him as he mumbled sweet nothings into your ear.

#slashers #i love big men #i need a big boy #house of wax #horror #slasher fucker #slasher fic #slashers smut #vincent sinclair smut #vincent sinclair x you #vincent sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair

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alluring-eclipse · 9 months

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N A G I T O S M U T H E A D C A N O N

Warning:smut (obviously) degrading, making out, oral (female receiving) dry humping, pet names

We're gonna go right into it because I'm a disappointment

He will do whatever you want in bed, except hurting you, he loves you so much, he would never want to hurt you

He would be more of a slow and sensual kinda guy, but my Lord, pull on his hair, my guy would go feral, he loves it when you do that

Nagito LOVES eye contact, he'll stop every thing and just look at you, seeing how beautiful you look, knowing that it's him that's making you feel this way

He doesn't have a lot of experience, so you have to teach him a bit, but damn, he is a fast learner

He fr melts in your touch, he loves it when you scratch his back

Speaking of wich, his favorite positions are most likely missionary and cowgirl, he loves to look at his partner while making love

PLEASE call him a good boy, he would eat it up, after him degrading himself so much, he needs a bit of praise

Now onto his, *cough* member *cough* I would like to say he is about 7.5 inches, maybe 8,and let me tell ya, my baby know how to use it after you showed him

While you two are doing it, he would say stuff along the lines of

"are you really this wet because of me? " "your so perfect, I really am lucky" "I love you so much my hope" "I can't believe you're really letting scum like me touch you this way" "you look so pretty wrapped around me like this" "please allow me to kiss you, even if I'm to bellow you to even think about doing so"

He is the king of giving head, he is much more of a giver than a receiver, when he's eating you out he acts like he's starving

Another thing that gets him going is when you make out, and when you grind on him while doing it

During the sexy soup episode, you didn't eat any of the soup, but since nagito did, he went kinda, yknow, he dry humped you behind a desk, and full on came in his pants, and once he found out, he could not stop apologizing

"Please forgive me my hope, how disgusting of me, trash like me doesn't deserve pleasure like that from you"

He loves you more than anything in the world

He belongs to you and only you, nothing will change that

#nagito x reader #danganronpa nagito #danganronpa v2 #danganronpa #nagito komaeda #x reader #smut #sexy content #nagito komeada x reader

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absolutebl · 23 days

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Hi ABL! I was wondering if you have recs for bl couples where a younger seme/top aggressively pursues an older, initially-unwilling uke/bottom?

I realized this trope was my absolute JAM when I fell hard and fast for Wei Zhiyuan x Wei Qian, Sun Boxiang x Lu Zhigang, and Yongjie x Xingsi. Bonus points for age gap, stepbrothers trope or the older uke being endlessly indulgent?

I mainly watch China and Taiwan bls, so I’ll love anything from there. I’ll take recs from other countries too, they might become my first foray into non-mandarin bls

I know this is a somewhat specific request so thank you sm if you manage to come up with anything! I really appreciate all the work you put into this blog ☺️💜

Oooo MY FAVORITE!!!

Hyung Romances! (wrap-up post)

I call these hyung romances because that's like noona romances but gay.

Specifically you said:

younger seme aggressively pursues an older initially-unwilling uke

I am utter TRASH for this! YES PLEASE!

Minato’s Laundromat

Japan 2022 GaGa

AKA Minato Coin Laundry AKA Wash My Heart! AKA Minato Shouji Koin Randorii AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry

Younger seme older uke, very clearly yaoi derived dynamic, 10 year age gap. I love this show so much. This is by far the best long running example that really dwells on this trope, Shin is very much the aggressor also very much still a high school kid. Minato is very much NOT.

Old Fashion Cupcake

Japan 2022 Viki & GaGa

Also from Japan, another 10 year gap, and a flipping genius version. This time both parties are older, so there’s less of a stigma around the age gap, but there is stigma about the one being the other’s boss.

This show had me from the moment they broke the egg yolk with the chopsticks in the opening credits for episode one. It’s about a younger man with a long cherished crush on his boss (ten years older and going through a mid life crisis) who decides to save and seduce said man with pancakes. It’s wholesome, comforting, sexy, and a very necessary narrative about still having hope, interests, and openness to affection at any age. It’s coming of age/queerness packaged in a subtle critique of expectations around masculinity and love and loneliness... and it’s beautiful. Full review.

Lovely Writer

Thailand 2021 YouTube

Sib is quite a bit younger than Gene and defines aggressive pursuer. Gene is out of university and established in his career, Sib is still in college.

Thailand criticizes itself and the BL industry while simultaneously giving us classic seme/uke with great chemistry in a one-two punch of “we love it, but are we supposed to? and must we think this hard, yet enjoy it SO MUCH?” This show won’t appeal or make sense to those who don’t already have at least some Thai BL watching experience. What Lovely Writer does, at heart, is reexamine Thai BL has done to queerness, but in a very gentle way that has more to do with Thai BL growing up than any actual queer authenticity. It’s not parody or pastiche, but it is self reflective and trying to correct for some chronic mistakes. Whether it is ultimately successful in this matter is going to depend on the watcher’s relationship to BL and queer identity. But that’s what makes this show beautiful, interesting, and thought provoking. And I, for one, applaud the effort even if I didn’t personally connect to the characters.

Oxygen

Thailand 2020 YouTube

Thailand’s first real stab at this dynamic as a main couple and it so worked for me. There are many who find this BL too slow and wooden, but I loved it.

I think of this as a paragon of Thailand’s softer BL style, since Oxygen uses every BL trope in the playbook for one of the gentlest lowest angst BLs ever made. This one showcases how far Thailand is moving BL from its yaoi roots, and is a prime example of the sweet “new BL” model for which Thailand is the main advocate (Korea is liking it a lot these days too, tho). My first watch along.

SOTUS

Thailand 2016 YouTube

Guess who started this trope in Thailand? Yeah, sometimes I forget too. But they are not just classic sunshine/tsunder but classic younger/older. Just not by much.

This is the BL that launched a hundred BLs. No literally, it was SOTUS’s international success that pretty much built the Thai BL industry into the juggernaut it is today. People have baggage around SOTUS, I have nostalgia. Trigger warning on bully hazing. Review here.

En of Love: Tossera

Thailand 2020 YouTube

Younger boy wants to court older boy and does and… that’s it. No really that’s the WHOLE STORY. There is actually no angst, drama, or, indeed plot. But are they the softest bois ever to BL as a main couple? Yes they are.

*pulp warning*

Private Lessons

Korea 2020 GaGa

A BL short from Strongberry that I love, it's age gap and teacher/student (catnip por moi). The chemistry is slightly off though, but stil I do love this one for the dynamic. Certainly worth watching especially if this is your trope since it's like 8 minutes long and very stylish.

MingKit MarkKit

2 Moons (VERY side dish) YouTube 2 Moons 2 YouTube (major side dish) Gen Y (leads) Gen Y 2 (sides again in LTR)

Thailand’s premier version of this dynamic I just lumped them all into one category. Only in 2 Moons 2 are they played by different actors, otherwise it is all KimCop, and who can complain about that? If you want to watch specifically for this dynamic than go for Gen Y. Trash watch here.

SIDE DISH CORNER

Not Me (DanYok)

DanYok is an age gap, but it isn’t really the point or the plot of their romantic arc

Don’t Say No (LeonPob)

Leon and Pob qualify. That’s all I have to say about that.

HIStory 3: the BL that shall not be named (BoXiang & ZhiGang)

Also appear in HIStory 4: Close to You

The side characters in H3:MODC (and cameos in H4) BoXiang & ZhiGang have a huge age gap, 12 years, and it is a big deal for their relationship. When they start out BoXiang is a desperate himbo high school kid and ZhiGang is a small business owner. BoXiang’s friends tease him more for his lust over such a much older man than for being gay.

Bonus on this one, there is some very high (and it's Taiwan so) very well done heat. That said, the main couple will, in fact, wreck your psyche for life. Proceed with caution.

THE THAI PULPS

You’re My Sky (SanAei)

Side could (and only good part of this show) SanAei are a classic uni age gap pairing. San is a bit of a spoiled rich kid jock who identifies the older nerd character as HIS and is just like, MINE. That’s MY elder gay.

Brothers (KhunKaow)

This is not a good show, but side couple Khun & Kaow are great in it. Khun is in university and Kaow has a small baking business.

Top Secret Together and Love By Chance both have sub plots of high school boys pursuing college ones, but the one didn’t go anywhere and the other went very very bad, so yeah… no. Although I would personally LOVE to see this done well.

BONUS POINTS ROUND

Stepbrothers trope

HIStory 4: Close to You (sides)

YongJie is quite a bit younger than XingSi, not sure on the specifics but he’s in middle school when XingSi is in high school and still in college when XingSi has his own business.

Addicted has the stepbrothers trope but not the age gap.

Older uke being endlessly indulgent

Future

Thailand 2023 YouTube

Based on a y-novel by Faddest (En of Love) about an engineering student and a dentist (shocker). This is just a soft sweet cotton candy fluff piece about a younger boy who pursues an older boy and then manufactures silly gay drama. Nothing wrong with that. But I don’t think this style of BL really appeals to a very large market share. Will I rewatch it? Sure. Will anyone else? Nope.

If you want your endlessly indulgent older gay, this is the you crack, they made if for you.

*pulp warning*

Manner of Death

Thailand 2021 WeTV

It’s not really relevant to the story, but Tan is younger. Not only that, he’s Bun’s friends younger brother. Bun is very indulgent, but in a grown up way.

I like MoD a lot but I’m conflicted over it being actual BL. It’s a great gay romantic suspense, although the mystery element is its weakness. MaxTul, the Kings of chemistry, are, of course, perfect and perfectly cast, but their romance thread is more a distraction than an addition. Still, I could watch them make-out the phonebook. Watch along here.

Seven Days

Japan 2015 grey

AKA Seven Days: Monday-Thursday AND Seven Days: Friday-Sunday Japan

Seryou kinda counts as the pursuer, but the dynamic is very very weak in this one. Still the way he asks to use Yuzuru’s first name (so CHEEKY) and the way he says “senpai” in SUCH a cute way makes me so happy. And Yuzuru is NOTHING is not indulgent, it kinda defines his character. I mean he just LETS him call him by his FIRST name... right away.

Never doubt my ability to recommend this show. One of the best live action yaois ever made, with perfectly structured angst, fantastic characters and acting, and no problematic tropes (rare in Japanese BL). The leads have excellent chemistry although it’s low heat there’s still some really cute mutual kisses.

Just Taiwan

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line

2018 Viki

Seme uke is VERY weak with this one but the younger character is certainly the pursuer. It’s SO GOOD.

Lin Pei Yu directs this is a sports romance (volleyball) with a good boy/bad boy pairing, and mu favorite of the HIStory franchise. There is no clear seme/uke. Ostensibly it's high school set but Taiwan doesn't care about age appropriate actors. It's a very soft sweet romance with some ridiculously easily overcome conflict. There's great kisses but it's medium heat. The side dishes are the stepbrother trope but they’re very tame, and there’s no other triggers. It's not just my favorite of the franchise, it’s one of my favorite BLs with a perfect happy ending.

Kiseki: Dear to Me

2023 Gaga

The mains are a major age gap, but I always forget because they def don't look it. Also, Taiwan, so very weak seme/uke. Still there is age gap, he's in high school and our gangster is out of college and in the workplace.

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged, but that’s normal for Taiwan. It involves all the tropes under a very casual framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. Absolutely every character is queer. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs, and a KILLER side couple. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan.

(Triggers for knife play, child abuse, lingering trauma.)

Unknown

2024 YouTube

Unknown is a wonderful BL with a pitch perfect portrayal of long term pining, age gap, and the stepbrothers trope. The acting and chemistry are ON POINT (especially from the leads) which made the resulting characters very believable. When it dwells in intimate family drama, it's stunning. It's slightly less successful when it leaves the home and goes gritty. Still, those are mere quibbles. This is an excellent show, one of Taiwan' s best.

As you see above I mostly had to take you to Japan and Thailand for this one. Considering your preferences try Japan first, it's closer in DNA to Taiwanese stuff, but it won't go as high heat. If you want the heat, you'll need to try the Thai stuff (or the ones from Taiwan you haven't seen). I would start with Lovely Writer.

Okay I think I have given you enough and, unless I miss my guess, I may have tempted you to try some Japanese BL.

Comes to the weirder (and weird hair) side. We have pancakes.

Yeah I think you should watch Old Fashion Cupcake.

EVERYONE SHOULD WATCH OLD FASHION CUPCAKE!!!

(source)

This post dated May 2024, not responsible for hyungs that sling after that date.

#bl with age gap #bl stepbrothers trope #bl younger guy pursues older guy #japanese bl #Minato’s Laundromat #old fashion cupcake #lovely writer #oxygen the series #That Bl #sotus #en of love #private lessons #strongberry #koeran bl #Manner of Death #future the series #seven days #HIStory 2: Crossing the Line #unknown the series

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the-au-thor · 3 months

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Babysitting Mun | Rockstar!Eddie Munson x Fem!reader

Note: So, a lot of you asked me for more parts to the little thing I wrote for rockstar!Eddie and you know you should ask and I'll deliver. If you like this I'll add more parts into this "series" cause I kinda like the dynamic between Assistant!Reader and Rockstar!Eddie.

Part 1

W/C: 3.2k

T/W: Read here!

As you walked through Eddie's property in Hollywood Hills, you saw him opening the door in his black velvet robe with his old D&D club emblem printed on the back. He had a worried expression on his face, and his legs were nervously fidgeting.

"It's my day off, Munson," you greeted as you reached his door.

He said your least favorite six words.

"Fey, I'm in a big trouble," he announced, opening the door and letting you into the huge foyer of his house.

It was a huge mess; underwear scattered on the floor, candy wrappers, empty bottles, and frankly, you didn't want to dig through the scattered blankets that left a trail upstairs. You looked at him impatiently, trying not to scream at him because that mess wasn't your home, and he could do whatever he wanted with it.

"This looks like a quiet Friday night, Munson, like any citizen of this beautiful city would have," you mentioned ironically.

Living a few blocks away was Marilyn Manson, Eddie could really recognize your tone.

"I met this girl: Baby," he said.

You blinked slowly.

"Cute name, I think my gynecologist also uses that stage name."

Eddie ignored your sardonic comment as he walked through the trash on the floor.

"She spent the night here, and it was amazing; sexy girl, beautiful blonde with... really long legs..."

You wanted to vomit.

"Munson. I'm not just another guy in your circle of friends, that's information I don't need to know," you reminded him with a churned stomach. "Why am I even here after receiving a call from you with a catastrophe voice?" you asked as he led you to his kitchen. Before entering, he looked at you with concern. You hadn't even seen him like this when he trashed the Marriott room, and photos of that night were leaked on a very famous morning show next day "Tell me she's not floating dead from an overdose in your pool because I'm telling you right now that I quit," you announced seriously.

He pressed his lips and stretched his arm toward the kitchen door; his robe opened, and you managed to see a bit of his chest full of tattoos covering the scars he never wanted to talk about.

"Worse," he announced before opening the door.

His huge kitchen greeted you. Everything seemed in order except for the dishwasher, which had a pile of dirty dishes. You scanned it, moving your gaze across the countertop and appliances until you reached the end of the marble table adorning the center of his kitchen, where a little boy with a curious knitted hat was sitting, concentrating on drawing something on a notebook with markers.

You closed the door to shout at Eddie without scaring the child.

"There's a kid in your kitchen," you pointed out, shocked with a muffled squeal. "What's a kid doing in your house, for God's sake. This is not a place for a child; this is not even a place for me."

"I don't know!" he whispered back, ignoring your offensive comment. That's when you knew he was really worried. "I went down this morning to make myself a smoothie, and I found him in the same spot. Little brat doesn't hear anything I say."

"Yeah? Well, sometimes I wish I didn't hear all the things you say," you frowned, opening the kitchen door again and walking toward the kid.

The little one had reddish strands peeking out from the edges of his hat and seemed clean and calm despite being alone in a huge house with a stranger who couldn't take care of himself properly. Unfazed, the kid continued coloring a drawing in his notebook, and you noticed a Animaniacs backpack behind him.

"Hey," you greeted him, then saw him coloring a dark-skinned man in what seemed to be a family portrait. You introduced yourself as you sat next to him. "What's your name?"

"I shouldn't talk to strangers," the child finally muttered, revealing a sweet and calm voice.

You smiled, almost proud that an unknown child could take care of himself despite, what? Being about 5 or 6 years old?

"That's okay," you nodded. "But you shouldn't be in a stranger's house either," you murmured, trying to reason with the child.

Eddie lost patience, after pinching the bridge of his nose, he put his palms on the island's surface, making the child stop coloring and look at him, scared.

"Where's your mother?" he asked.

"Munson!" you scolded him, but he didn't seem to regret his little outburst, especially since he at least got a reaction from the kid.

"For crying out loud, Fey, I've tried asking him a hell numerous times about his mother, and he still won't answer," Eddie explained, pointing his finger at the child.

"She said she'd come for me; I don't know if she mentioned anything else while she was with you," the kid spoke seriously, and you noticed that Eddie wasn't very well-liked.

Eddie pressed his lips and pointed his index finger at him.

"Look, you little sh..."

"Oh, okay!" you stood up to intervene, taking Eddie by the shoulders. "You know, superstar? I think I can handle it from here. You go..." you looked at him closely; he was wearing mismatched socks, and his hair was a mess "go brush your teeth and... wash yourself" you started pushing him out of the kitchen.

"I need you to fix this, Fey."

You frowned and lowered your voice.

"I should let you fix it yourself, you know?" you asked. "But that kid isn't to blame if his mother prefers a man over his own safety," you spat angrily and laughed sardonically, "you sure know how to pick 'em," you murmured almost disdainfully.

You had never criticized his flings, even when the most terrible girls had done the walk of shame right in front of you, you had kept your opinions to yourself. Moreover, you also acknowledged a severe emotional problem in Eddie, something about fear of commitment, yet seeking love as long as he was safe from getting hurt. Still, you hadn't opened your mouth to comment on it. This was the limit.

"I'll find out about his parents and try to contact her," you assured him before closing the kitchen door in his face without letting him defend himself and turning to look at the child who watched the exchange you and Eddie had had.

"I hate mom's boyfriends," the child finally admitted before returning to his coloring.

You sighed somewhat sadly for him; it was clear he was more than used to being in strange houses with people he didn't know.

"I know, but the good thing is that the grumpy one over there is not her boyfriend, so don't hate him too much, okay?" you asked, although you really didn't owe Eddie anything. You sat back down next to him. "Did your mommy give you any instructions before she left?"

The boy shrugged.

"She said to be a good boy, not to bother, and that she would come to get me before the day ended."

You nodded uncertain about what the hell that could mean to that woman "before the day ended."

"Okay," you picked up your cell phone and called Florence, the housekeeper, to start cleaning up the mess Eddie left in the main room and probably in his bedroom as well. You didn't want to find out, to be honest

"I clean too, you know…when my mom is too tired to do anything," the kid said when you finished the call.

You looked at the child and squinted thoughtfully.

"How old are you?"

"I'm turning eight next month."

You raised your eyebrows.

"Great, have someone ever told you that you're very mature for a seven-year-old? It's good that you take care of your mom."

The boy looked up from his notebook and glanced at you for a few seconds.

"My name is Tobias, they call me Toby."

You smiled.

"Nice to meet you, Tobias, I already told you my name, right?"

"But he called you Fey."

You chuckled when you saw that he was referring to Eddie.

"Yeah, he kind of plays by his own rules, so don't worry, Toby," you leaned on the island and smiled at him. "Toby, this is not a place for a child, and if I take you with me, it will be difficult for your mother to find you. Is there any way I can contact someone else from your family?" you asked, hoping the kid had at least one functional adult who could help him.

The child seemed pensive.

"I have my emergency information in my backpack," he recalled, and you smiled relieved, jumping away from the island and going for his backpack.

"All right, Toby, did you eat anything?"

"Mom gave me cereal before she left," he changed markers and continued drawing carefully.

"Cereal doesn't sound enough, do you want me to make you some toast with eggs and bacon? Honestly, I'm famished and could use something to eat," you announced as you prepared the food for Toby.

When Eddie and the band weren't on tour, you made sure to fill Eddie's fridge and pantry with things that weren't preheated and frozen food. When you were hired as his assistant over a year ago, this wasn't part of your duties, but you couldn't see him get intoxicated with poorly frozen pizza again. It was easier to keep track of his diet when you were on tour with them; they spent most of their time together, and that's when he behaved the best. It was during breaks like these when he lost a bit of control and got into trouble he couldn't handle alone.

You and Toby ate, and you saved some for Eddie whenever he wanted to came down from his room, already bathed and dressed in something more than just underwear and a robe. Florence went to the kitchen to clean up the mess Eddie had left there, and you went to the living room where the housekeeper made magic. When Eddie came down from his room, he was wearing an old black-sleeved shirt and worn-out jeans. His feet, however, were bare, showing the tattoos he had gotten a few weeks ago.

"Finally," you stood up with your phone when you saw Eddie starting to walk to the sofa and looking at Toby with despair. He looked at you somewhat impatiently.

"And he's still here," he rolled his eyes slightly resigned and sighed.

"I'm sorting that out now; I need you to stay with Toby for a few minutes. His mother hasn't shown any signs of life, but I have his father's contact," you asked him with a low voice so that Toby, sitting on the sofa while trying to solve some math problems from his algebra class, wouldn't hear.

"Oh, so the little Boggle has a name," he said sarcastically.

"Behave!" you asked him with a frown and approached him to wipe shaving foam from his chin as he obediently stood still. "We left French toast and egg with bacon for you," you announced, while going to the kitchen to prepare Toby's food.

Eddie rolled his eyes slightly resigned and sighed.

"Great: he stays in my house, eats my food, and now I have to be his babysitter."

"Yeah, Munson," you nodded, "it's good for you to occasionally taste your own medicine."

"You better find that kid's father, Fey; it's been a while since I dealt with kids, and I wasn't very good at it either," he admitted.

"Yeah, yeah," you started dialing Toby's father's number and walked to the backyard so as not to have an awkward conversation in front of the kid. "Do me a favor and don't create emotional permanent scars on him, okay?"

He made a face, sticking his tongue out and hissing like a snake, earning Toby's curious look.

"What?" Eddie asked. "Have you never been a kid in your life?"

Toby settled on the sofa somewhat tense.

"Sometimes I stick my tongue out at mom when she doesn't see me," he admitted.

Eddie watched him; he was a little goblin with round glasses and somewhat chubby. Not only was he lost, but he seemed lost, and suddenly for a brief moment, Eddie saw himself in a corner of the cafeteria where his mom worked, drawing magical creatures in an old notebook while waiting for it to be midnight so his mom's shift would end and he could go home. His mom would never have left him alone in a stranger's house, of course. The kid's mother was hot, but stupid, totally stupid.

"Okay, Pip, what are you doing?" Eddie saw his notebook and closed it even to the little protest of the child. "You're not going to be doing this on a Saturday in my house; you're what? Four?"

"I'm turning eight," he said through gritted teeth.

"You and I are going to listen to music, okay? Have you ever heard music before?"

"I'm seven, not an alien," he replied, almost offended.

Eddie went to pick a record from his vinyl collection and gave you a knowing smile.

"Let's educate you, Pip."

"My name isn't Pip," the kid said tiredly, remembering what you had told him about Eddie playing by his own rules.

Eddie then put the record on his record player, and the music started playing.

Tobias's father was leaving his job at the mechanic downtown to go pick him up from Eddie's house. Having a conversation with him wasn't difficult, and he seemed genuinely concerned about his son, so at least you were getting back inside Eddie's house with the relief of returning the kid to someone who actually cared. You heard the music before stepping inside the house, Toby's laughter mixing with Eddie's and Kevin Rowland's voice. When you passed by the living room, Eddie had managed to get the kid to leave the notebook aside and had taken off his shoes to dance to the music, mimicking Eddie in his delirious spiral as he tried to play air guitar following the notes of Geno.

You watched them; Eddie's still wet hair bouncing around his face as he encouraged Toby to follow the music and listen to the bass because that's where the beat is or something like that. You leaned against the wall to watch their act for the rest of the song. Your stomach did that again; every time Eddie showed some substance beneath that tough shell of indifference.

You disappeared from there and only returned to announce that Toby's father had arrived to pick him up, finding Eddie trying to teach him a cooler way to tie his shoelaces. You smiled at the kid and guided him to his father who was waiting outside with his well-maintained Volkswagen. Toby ran to his father, and he hugged him lovingly; there was no trace of neglect.

"I really appreciate you taking care of him; I don't know how to repay you," he thanked you, still holding the boy in his arms. The man had somewhat dark skin and curly hair, like Toby's. "My ex-wife is a bit careless and thinks everyone can take care of him. I'll talk to her; I know this looks bad."

"It's not your fault," you began to deny, but Eddie took over the conversation.

"Tell her she's a very S-H-I-T-T-Y mother, and I hope she appreciates the son she has," he mentioned bluntly in a low voice so that Toby wouldn't hear.

You slightly chuckled because Eddie had at least meant well by insulting Toby's mother without him noticing.

"Eddie, I'm seven, I already know how to spell," the boy wriggled out of his father's embrace to give Eddie a furrowed brow.

Well, at least he had the intention. It didn't work, but it's the thought that counts.

"I'm Nelson, by the way," he introduced himself, shaking Eddie's hand. "I'm sorry you had to be my son's babysitter."

"I'm sorry I slept with your ex," Eddie mentioned bluntly, without mincing words, and close to the guy's ear so that Toby wouldn't hear.

"No problem," he even seemed amused by it. "Lilian is free to do what she wants."

So she has a name…

Eddie gave you a sidelong glance, and you just smiled back at Nelson because you wouldn't throw one of your witty sarcastic comments.

Finally, Toby said goodbye to Eddie, and you could see a sad gleam in his eyes, seeming like a huge difference from the way the kid had looked at him annoyed that morning in the kitchen. Eddie Munson, of course, would manage to win over the kid whose mother had put aside for a brief fling with a rocker who you were sure would end up being just a forgettable event. You hugged Toby, trying not to lose your composure, reminding yourself that the kid wasn't your responsibility, and bid them both farewell with a smile.

You and Eddie watched the car disappear behind the large fortified gates of his mansion, and then you heard him chuckle.

"She was sexier when she was Baby, not Lilian," he murmured humorously.

You raised a slight smile and laughed, crossing your arms to look at him sideways.

"And when she was just a girl with long legs and not a S-H-I-T-T-Y mother, huh?" Eddie rolled his eyes but didn't refute your comment. "You'd be a very B-A-D-A-S-S father by the way."

He frowned quickly, incredulous.

"What the hell are you talking about, Fey?"

You turned to him, trying to hide your smile.

"About you with Toby; you won him over, Mun. I think when you decide to settle down and stop doing stupid shits that I have to save you from, you'll be a very good father."

He blinked rapidly, incredulous.

"Did you find the jewelry box in my underwear drawer and smoke whatever was inside?"

You frowned.

"a) I would never go through your underwear drawer by my own will, and b) thanks for telling me where you hide your crap," you replied quickly. "I'm not joking, Munson, I mean it from the heart."

He seemed to hate that idea, although something in his gaze seemed somewhat moved, but he quickly made it disappear with a look of disgust.

"Not gonna discuss that with you, Fey. I won't be a good father 'cause I'm never gonna be a father in first place"

You frowned ready to argue about that

"But, Munson..."

"Feywild, I pay you to be my assistant, not my motivational coach; assist me."

"Fine, I already assisted you on my day off, so I think this is my cue to leave," you went for your bag into his Foyer, and when you came out, Eddie was waiting for you in the same place, in the opulent entrance of his home next to the marble pillars holding the front facade. "I hope I don't have to come because you adopted another one of your girl's babies, okay?" you asked, but you weren't really blaming him for anything.

Eddie noticed it from the way you looked at him, and you decided to do that small servile bow that, unwittingly, you always did when you said goodbye to him or accepted one of his complicated tasks. He saw you start walking out, where you surely parked your car.

"Feywild," he called you, and you turned to him. You had strands of your hair on your face, and he saw your slightly worn-out converse sneakers, which you always wore even though you had money to replace them but for some reason were emotionally attached to them.

He could tease you about it, but he wouldn't. He understood without you explaining it because there was a reason he kept his old van in his garage with the same scraped paint.

"What's up, Munson, already missing me?"

He smiled. "Thanks for saving my ass today."

You pressed your lips into a smile. "Always, Mun."

#eddie munson x female reader #rockstar!eddie x reader #rockstar!eddie munson x assistant!reader #rockstar eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson frenemies to lovers #corroded coffin #eddie munson #stranger things fanfic #stranger things au #edie munson au

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dangermousie · 11 months

Text

Dramas for the first half of 2023

Now that we are six months into 2023, time to do one of these posts. I am gonna include both Korean and Chinese dramas, because why not and any drama I even checked out is on it.

DRAMAS WATCHED

29. Romance of Twin Flower (China) - make it cease existing! My favorite het web novel got murdered and then had its grave spat on.

28. Dominator of Martial Gods (China) - if MST3K still existed, this drama would be prime material for it.

27. Wanru’s Journey (China) - acting. Try it!

26. Royal Rumors (China) - they tried acting. But forgot to try having a functional screenplay on top.

25. The Last Princess (China) - acting is nonexistent and the story is trash but it never aspired to be what it wasn’t and was kinda cute.

24. Oasis (Korea) - great acting in a story with a screenplay that goes round and round fruitlessly like a hamster in a cage.

23. The Trust (China) - the OTP in this one swaps bodies but it would have been better for everyone if whoever made this and an actual competent writer swapped theirs.

22. Snow Eagle Lord (China) - yet another drama in which Xu Kai does his best to keep acting opposite a wooden costar and through a terrible screenplay. There is something seriously wrong with that man’s career choices.

21. Heartbeat (Korea) - the good: it’s harmless. The bad: it’s harmless.

20. Back from the Brink (China) - ummm the people are pretty? And if I were 10 I’d be all about this show but as is...

19. Joseon Attorney (Korea) - slightly less fun than reading a legal treatise.

18. The Starry Love (China) - the definition of a xianxia playing it safe and pastel; I did love the secondary couple a lot but it was not enough to save that snoozefest of a drama.

17. Chong Zi (China) - badly acted and a screenplay that somehow manages to be both repetitive and disjointed. But I am a sucker for the shizunfucker trope so here we are.

16. Island (Korea) - a mess but Kim Nam Gil is hot with a sword.

15. Circle of Love (China) - rationally, a hot mess. But so entertaining and addicting and fall of make outs of epicness!

14. Lady Durian (Korea) - makjang from the Queen of Makjang and with that scrumptious cast! This is gonna be GOOD!

13. The Forbidden Marriage (Korea) - sweet and oddly charming despite nobody in it bothering to act much.

12. Pledge of Allegiance (China) - the way they had to edit it likely due to censorship made it less than it what could have been but still more than most dramas this year.

11. Choice Husband (China) - delicious cliches and tropes and angst in the rain!

10. Hidden Love (China) - to make ME of all people to care about a fluffy modern is a bona fide miracle but the two mains are chemistry machines who portray longing so well.

9. Gone with the Rain (China) - wildly uneven but our heroine and the sexy general she eventually chooses are pure gold!

8. The Secret Romantic Guest House (Korea) - how to do youth sageuk right. Everything about this just works!

7. Alchemy of Souls: Light and Shadow (Korea) - it has flaws but is so gorgeous and full of longing and grief and everything good!

6. Tale of the Nine Tailed 1938 (Korea) - a sequel/prequel that is almost as good as the original, how often does that happen?

5. See You In My 19th Life (Korea) - wacky and grieving, delicate and odd, this is everything I ever want in a kdrama.

4. Call It Love (Korea) - a truly exquisite story of trauma and loneliness and healing and love.

3. Till the End of the Moon (China) - gloriously messy in every way this is just MORE. The ending is enraging and there are issues but when it hits, it hits so hard the rest of it does not matter - the dark characters, the dysfunctional love story, the battles, the insane visuals, the EVERYTHING of it. This is what fantasy should be like.

2. Chang Feng Du/Destined (China) - came out of nowhere to own my heart via its story of growing up and finding love and slow organic relationship building and keeping your soul in a world of horrors.

1. The Ingenuous One (China) - the best one, so I am gonna talk about it below.

FAVORITE DRAMA

The Ingenuous One - so impossibly solid, from acting to visuals to screenplay to EVERYTHING! Adult characters with adult issues and choices, both moral dilemmas and battles equally compelling. The love stories, the friendships, the shades of grey. This is utterly and completely adult.

WORST DRAMA

Romance of the Twin Flower - if I could make one drama cease to exist, this would be it.

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER

Tantai Jin, Till The End of the Moon - the best character this year hands down - by turns (and timelines) unhinged monster, a contained saint, a victim of abuse trying to attain being viewed as human, a schemer, a ruler, grief personified, curiosity and monstrosity and nobility all mingled.

Runner up: Jang Uk, Alchemy of Souls - sunshine boy gone dark and grieving, but still with that same core of steel.

FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER

Shim Woo Joo, Call It Love - she’s damaged and impulsive and relationship-phobic and revenge driven and glorious!

Runner Up: Shu Ya Nan (The Ingenuous One) - allowed to be tough and dark and with her own agenda and not a member of a good sect and just so cool.

NEEDS TO BE MURDERED

Han Dong Jin’s Mom, Call It Love - that woman was horrifying and the source of so much of his trauma; a real realistic monster petty in all ways except for the damage she inflicted.

FAVORITE SHIP

Gu Jiusi/Liu Yuru, Chang Feng Du - wholesome and helping each other grow and talking it out but also there is blood feeding and midnight rescues and everything. They are good but not in the least boring.

Runner Up: Woo Joo/Dong Jin, Call It Love - two wounded souls finding such slow but such amazing healing with each other.

FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP

Su Ming Yu/Ke Menglan, The Ingenuous One - there’s actually been a lot of good secondary OTPs this year (General x Fox in TTEOTM, Investigator x Princess, TIO, Rang/Mermaid, TOTNT1938) but these two owned my heart - gentleman merchant x gambling hostess ftw.

NOTP

Romance of Twin Flower - they took my favorite het novel OTP, smart and coldblooded and forces of nature and turned them into THAT?

SHIRTLESSNESS AWARD

Xiao Hong Ye, Circle of Love - guy was a terrible abuser but those pecs were the real sin!

CRAZIEST FUNFEST

Circle of Love - screenplay written by rabid monkeys and populated by a bunch of psychos but such ridiculous, irresistible fun!

FAVORITE SCENE

Tantai Jin confronting Li Susu in jail, Till the End of the Moon - the energy, the intensity, the darkness the EVERYTHING.

BIGGEST CRUSH

Li Gong Quan, The Ingenuous One - yeah whatever, I realize he’s a minor character but I loved him so much! The whole having to bring down your benefactor who’s gone evil tho you are in love with his daughter should have been a whole other drama!

BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER

Chen Wende, Gone with the Rain - most of this drama is not that exciting but whenever his King of Trolls hot general shows up, I sit up and pay attention. I am 35 eps deep because of him.

NEEDS A SEQUEL

The Ingenuous One - I am dying to see what happens to royal investigator and supposedly dead princess, how our OTP will travel the world, the merchant and his lady, Ten Taels and his orphans and his girl and just everything. I loved these people so!

NEEDS A DIRECTOR’S CUT

Till the End of the Moon - it was clear they cut a BUNCH in the last third to fit the ridiculous new “40 eps or bust” rule and it would flow so much more smoothly if it was allowed to breathe.

NEEDS SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

Romance of Twin Flower - it should have been shredded into nonexistence sorry not sorry.

TOO MANY SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

Pledge of Allegiance - this drama was good but had gaping lacunae where too many scissors were taken to it for censorship reasons; I am surprised even what’s left was allowed to air tbh but still...

TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE

Shrill = cute - I see it every year, I hate it every year.

FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF

Hot Men Whump - come one, TTEOTM alone would fill the quota but we also had CFD, Call It Love, See You in my 19th life etc etc.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT

Back from the Brink - it’s based on a novel by an author whose other novels (Zhao Yao, Blue Whispers, Mulberry Song) I adore and the novelist was the screenwriter so I was so excited. But it was a juvenile, flat mess that de-powered the heroine and taught me that yeah, sometimes the writer should not adopt their work.

BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE

Chang Feng Du - I loved the novel but the trailers were a fluffy bland disaster and I checked it out with zero expectations. However, this is a glorious adaptation, a lesson in how to transport a massive novel on screen into slim 40 eps and to account for changes in medium and stricter censorship restrictions for dramas versus books while keeping the essential vibe of the original.

BEST NON-2023 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2023

The Imperial Doctress (China) - the pining the pining by the Hot Emperor! This is like all my web novel dreams come true!

MOST ANTICIPATED

A Journey to Love/Prisoner of Beauty/My Journey to You/Kunning Palace - maybe one of them will air before the world ends.

#cdrama #kdrama #2023 drama list

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peyton-warren · 11 months

Note

Fanfic Writers: Director’s Cut:

I'd love to know more about what Sy is thinking after reader practically ran away from him in 'Blinded by the Fog' chapter 5

Only took 4 months, hon. I just hope it was worth the wait. I decided to write a new chapter just from Sy's perpective of the time leading up to Chapter 5, and whats going on before he shows up for dinner at Cougar's mom's. And somehow that turned into over 5k words....

Thank you for hand holding while i worked through my writer's block.

Without further ado here it is.

Blinded by the Fog Behind the Scenes I

Characters: Captain Syverson and Reader. Mention of Jake Jensen and Cougar Pairings: Jake Jensen x Reader, Syverson x reader

Word count: 5012 Type: angst and fluff Warning: 18+. Minors DNI. Loss of spouse and found family. drinking, swearing. Grief. Therpy/ emotional baggage type language. Vague mention of shitty childhood for reader.

Summary: An in depth look at what is going on in Sy's head in Blinded by The Fog Chapters 4, 5 and 6.

Author's Note: Thank you to @adulting-sucks for her continued support, especially when I want to chuck this whole thing in the trash and never look at it again. Sy's Running Play list: Here

Ask Box: Open

Series Masterlist Masterlist

Sy couldn't believe his heart was almost pounding as you walked into his living room dressed in his clothes. He had it bad he realized, not for the first time in even the last 10 minutes. He took you in from head to toe, you were effortlessly sexy in his clothes, and God how much he wanted to grab you and make you his own, crushing you under his weight, pinning you to this couch, carrying you off to his bedroom, making you forget your heartache, your sorrows, your troubles. Instead he held out an open beer as you settled on the opposite end of the couch, curling your legs under you.

“Feel better?” he asked even though that was a loaded question. He knew it was tempting fate that you might fall back down into the spiral of mourning, but he honestly wanted to know if you felt more comfortable than you had, if he, his favorite comfortable clothes and his home made you feel better. It was selfish of him, he knew that, but right now he couldn’t help it. He wanted nothing in this world more than to make you feel something more than just the sadness that seemed to consume you these past few months.

“A little bit,” you had admitted to him as you put the bottle to your lips. “So what are we watching?” He had to pull his eyes away from yours, forcing himself to grab the remote from the coffee table and gesturing at the TV. “Figured I’d go with a classic. Big Trouble in Little China.”

The light that sprung up in your face, in your eyes, was addicting, he realized. “I haven’t seen that in ages,” you had told him, as you sat up, reaching over him for a slice of pizza. Sy inhaled your soft smell. He didn’t do it with any intention, it was instinctual when he caught a small whiff of you so close he couldn't stop himself from drawing a deeper breath. Embarrassed by his own action, he pressed play, dropping the remote, and hoped you did not notice.

You didn’t seem to as you settled back into the arm of the sofa, your eyes trained on the screen as you munched on your pizza, beer tucked between your thighs as you stretched out your legs, napkin on your thigh. He really shouldn’t be noting that you seemed to relax more as you ate another slice, and finished off your beer. He shouldn't have been pleased by your small smile when he first quoted Burton. And he definitely should not be happy by your adorable little snort as he quoted Burton the second time. “The check is in the mail.”

After you had your fill of the pizza and the movie progressed, Sy watched as you tucked your feet under your thighs, your hands wrapping around your toes. “Cold?” he asked, his hand hovering over yours. When you nodded cautiously, he gently pushed your hands aside and wrapped his fingers around the arch of your foot, pulling it from under you. “Been told I’m like a furnace,” he admitted, tucking your toes under his thigh, encouraging you to wiggle both feet under his leg. Grabbing the throw off the back of the sofa, he laid it over your legs, basically tucking them in as you hummed happily. “Thank you,” you whispered softly, giving him that smile he longed to see. “That is much better.”

Sy simply slipped his hand under the blanket and wrapped his fingers around your ankles, squeezing gently, trying to look as casual as possible, forcing his eyes to watch the screen instead of you scooting down further into the couch, under his favorite blanket, looking like you belonged there. It really wasn't long after that you fought your eyes from closing, and you finally lost that battle, falling quickly into sleep's embrace. Soft snores came from the other end of the couch, and Sy couldn't stop from staring at you, watching you snooze like a complete creeper. With every twitch, he scolded himself he should watch the movie, but he couldn’t tear his eyes from your sleeping form, happy you were comfortable enough, safe enough here with him to sleep. He expected you didn’t sleep well on your own based on the constant tired eyes you sported in the few months he had known you.

He realized as Jack Burton praddled on in the basement of the warehouse in San Francisco’s Chinatown, that he felt like he had known you his whole life, that the connection the two of you had forged felt like one that would last the rest of his days on this earth. And that scared him, scared him so much.

Gently squeezing your ankles again, he forced himself to watch the movie, emptying his beer, leaving the bottle resting against his other leg. As much as he’d like another, he didn’t want to move, didn’t want to wake you, didn't want to take that chance. Instead he settled for running his thumb over your ankle bone, as he watched the rest of the movie.

After it ended, Sy sat there for a bit longer in the silence of his home. Enjoying it. He didn’t realize how much he missed having someone else in his space until you appeared. Yes he missed Aika and was counting down until she was released from quarantine since their last deployment. But it had been even longer since he had another human, a woman, in his space. Having someone who understood his work, at least at the surface level. Though after Jake and the Losers’ demise would you be willing to get involved with another military man?

Sy rubbed his free hand over his face and beard. Fuck. He knew he was jumping the gun more than a hair. You were still fresh in your grief over your husband and friends' deaths. Why would he be thinking about making this anything more than ‘just friends’ at this point? That wasn’t fair to you. You were so vulnerable and trying hard to be the strong woman you expected yourself to be. He couldn’t hope for anything from you more than just friendship. And he was happy with that. He really was. He’d take you in his life anyway you were willing to give.

With a deep sigh, he rose from the couch, watching as your legs stretched out, your feet rubbing together and settling in the warm spot he left behind as you continued to slumber. As cozy as you looked, he couldn’t leave you here. The bed in the guest room had become a makeshift laundry sorting and pile spot, despite how clean he kept the rest of the house. That left his bed as the only other option. He’d deposit you there and then come back and sleep on the couch himself. He’d napped on it plenty over the years. He’d manage just fine for a full night. Hell, he’d slept in way worst places thanks to the US Army.

Pulling the throw his great aunt made for him before he left for the military off of you, Sy carefully picked you up, pulling you close, cradling you in his arms. Instinctually, you curled into him, seeking his warmth, pressing your face to his chest. Smiling, he headed down the hall, gently kicking the door open. He felt your fingers tangle in his shirt as he shifted you, your fingers catching a hair or two off of his belly in the t-shirt he was wearing. As he walked to the side of the bed, you seemed to burrow further into his arms, as if you sensed he was trying to separate the two of you, and you didn’t want that to happen. Aaran didn’t want that to happen. He wanted to crawl into this bed with you, his bed, but that wasn’t fair to you, nor to him. Especially when you muttered a soft “I love you” to your deceased husband.

Instead he laid you on the bed, and pulled your hand from his shirt by distracting you with soft kisses across your forehead. Laying the blanket around you and standing to leave. From the doorway, he looked back, watching you seem to effortlessly settle into his bed, and into his heart.

“Ni-night, baby.”

Sy woke the next morning on the couch, curled on his side, his head resting on the throw pillow, a blanket pulled over him. His arms were crossed tight across his chest, the couch giving him so little space for his appendages. But as he sat up with a crick in his neck, he remembered why he had slept out here as he pulled the blanket into his lap, your soft smell filling his nose. A small smile crossed his face as he folded the soft fleece and laid it across the back of the sofa.

Glancing at his watch, he recognized the super early hour and figured as tired as you had been lately he could get a decent run in before you were up this morning. Stretching his back, he headed towards the laundry room, knowing he had just washed some shorts and old t-shirts yesterday, certain he could use them for his morning exercise without needing to bug you.

It was after he donned the soft well loved clothes that he realized he had cast his running shoes into a corner of his bathroom the other day when he was too lazy to take them off by the door, in too much of a hurry to get to the shower.

“Fuck.” Quietly he opened the door to the bedroom, praying the usually squeaky hinges were quiet, his sight immediately falling on you, looking for any sign that he had woken you. Finding none, he quickly shuffled to the bathroom, snagging the pair of shoes off the floor, before turning to escape. Before he could, you moved, your legs shuffled under the blanket maybe, or you drew a deeper breath, or maybe your pinky flexed, and it drew his attention to the bed. He forbade himself from moving any closer to you than where he was. He also forbade himself from thinking how right you looked curled up in the bed, his bed. He felt his body react at the thought of forgetting all about his morning run for a different form of exercise he possibly could get in if he slipped into the bed with you. Instead he reminded himself again that you were newly widowed, and the last thing you needed right now was someone fucking with you, literally. He had no right to try to act on the feelings that were growing with each passing day, passing hour, passing second.

With a rueful sigh, he let himself out of the room, closing the door softly behind him. After slipping his shoes on, he set up the ancient coffee maker to begin brewing, knowing at the very least he would appreciate the warm beverage when he returned. By the look of the sky outside, Sy would be lucky if he came home dry let alone warm.

GrabbIng an empty envelope from a pile of mail on his counter, he quickly wrote you a note to inform you of his intent to return shortly which he propped up on a clean mug. Grabbing his ear buds off the counter, he headed out, hoping a hard run would chase the impure thoughts about you out of his head.

Instead his iPod had other plans. Sy hit skip as soon as A.D.I.D.A.S appeared on the screen as he hit play, swearing for not the first time that he needed to take that song off of his iPod all together. A couple blocks away he realized just how inappropriate the lyrics to Black Dog actually were. He skipped through almost half of his playlist, realizing how dirty many of the lyrics were, even songs he thought were harmless like Brown Sugar. Even that one Katy Perry guilty pleasure song made a maddening appearance in his ears.

He was glad it started to rain as he hit the halfway point of his long run, realizing the run itself was doing little to kill his inappropriate thoughts about you. When his shuffled playlist threw back to back songs Pearl Necklace and Relax by Frankie goes to Hollywood in his brain, Sy yanked the earbuds out and stuffed them in his pocket. He picked up the pace to make it home before he was soaked to the bone, though the thought of taking a shower was glorious at this point, and even that brought thoughts of you to his brain. He couldn’t win, he decided, and slowed his pace, letting the cold of the rain soak into his skin.

His blood ran cold to match the weather as he saw you sitting curled up on his porch, still dressed in his shirt and sweats, but now they were wet. Why were you outside? Why weren’t you inside? What had happened? His feet splashed through the puddles in his yard as he raced to you. You didn’t even flinch as he jogged up the steps, the dread in his chest sinking into his gut. “What’s wrong?” he asked, kneeling in front of you, a hand on your knee. With a violent swipe, you pushed his hand away, revealing your face to him, both causing his heart to fracture. “What happened, baby?” he tried again, settling his own knees beside you.

“Don’t call me that,” you growled, using the sleeve of his shirt you had slept in to wipe at the snot and tears that accumulated on your face.

Sitting back, Sy looked at you, trying to assess what had happened, but his brain didn’t come up with much outside of his ogling of you earlier, did you catch him? Did he do something else that you deemed inappropriate? What the hell happened in the hour or so since he had left for his run? With a deep breath to center himself, he focused on what he could do for you now. “Let’s get you inside,” he said, grabbing for your arm which you ripped from his grip.

“Lemme go.”

Putting his hands up in surrender, he got your message you didn't want to be touched, and he stood and reached for the door, finding it locked. Silently, he slipped from the porch back out into the rain to go grab the spare key he kept hidden in the shed. He returned to find you curled back in on yourself. He opened the door, turning to tell you, but found you getting to your feet. He quickly stepped back as you pushed through the door, ripping your bag and clothes from the hook as your wet bare feet slapped against the wood floors. How you did not slip he didn’t have any clue, which only made you more impressive than you already were in his opinion.

“I need you to take me to my car,” you said, your voice rough and haggard, snapping him out of his thoughts as you retreated to the bathroom, the door slamming making him wince.

“Well fuck me,” he muttered, suddenly catching up that he had no idea what had happened to make you go from the sweet girl cuddled into his couch last night to this thunder cloud and it didn’t seem like you were willing to tell him what had happened . Pulling the wet shirt from his frame, he grabbed a hoodie from a hook, switching their places as he reached for his truck keys and headed out the door. His running shorts weren’t as soaked as the shirt and he figured he didn’t have time to change them anyway. Instead he turned the truck on, cranking the heat, hoping it was a hair warmer than the damp air outside by the time you two climbed in.

He stepped back into his foyer as you reemerged from the guest bathroom, your bag slung over your shoulder. “Let’s go,” you snapped, grabbing your work shoes as you headed out the door.

“Alright.” He followed you out, half noticing you pause on the porch as he locked the door behind you. He didn’t think too much of it as you stalked towards the truck, not even trying to get in front of you to grab the door, uncharacteristically letting you climb in for yourself.

Putting the truck into drive after you had snapped your seat belt on, Sy noted you checking your phone that had been sitting on the seat when you climbed in. Suddenly things started to make a little more sense; you had lost your phone, you were worried about Jolene because you were certain you were going to let the other woman down. You were always too fucking hard on yourself, and he wished he could make you stop. You needed to stop. You were doing all you could for Jolene, and Madre, and he imagined Aubrey too though he hadn’t seen the girl since the accident. He made a mental note to check in on her soon. But not now. “Fuck,” you softly swore, as you cradled your head, your voice suddenly so tired and worn.

“Gonna tell me what's got you so wound up?” Sy tried again,

“Nope,” you replied, letting the P pop loudly in the cab. “Just need to go home.”

He may be a man, but he knew when to take a hint. He wasn’t going to get anywhere with you right now by pushing. He let it go. For now. “A’ight.”

He noticed you gathering your things tighter in your fists as you neared the parking lot, and your car. He would have snorted that you looked like one of his seasoned men about to tuck and roll out of a military vehicle if he wasn't so pissed off and confused at the moment. He couldn't believe his ears when he heard the door open before he even came to a complete stop. You were gonna hurt yourself.

“Sugar, wait-” He threw the truck into park and grabbed for your elbow, trying to slow you down but you were gone before he could get a solid hold on you. He silently cursed himself for having parked with your car next to your door, he should have thought that one through a little more as he dropped to the ground and rounded the front of the truck to see you peel out of the lot without a glance at him.

“Goddamnit.”

He sucked in a deep breath before dropping his hands from his hips, and climbed back into the truck. He stared at the entrance that you had just left from, pondering for a moment if he should follow you and try to make you talk to him or if he should just let you go. You did seem to deflate some after you checked your phone. Maybe it was just that you had been worried about Jolene, and nothing more.

Dropping the truck into drive, he headed for home, giving you space you clearly wanted right now. There was nothing he could do for you if you didn’t let him in. As soon as he got there, he grabbed his phone from where he left it during his run, on the charger in the kitchen, and sent you a text asking if you got home ok. With no more than that, he tossed it aside and strode to his bathroom, making himself to ignore where you had slept last night. He was going to take this forced separation from you to get his head back on straight, taking the time to remind himself the only reason he had even met you was because of your husband’s recent accident. So very recent, way too recent for him to be thinking you would want anything with anyone else.

Angrily he stripped off his hoodie, tossing it and his shorts in the hamper in the corner of the bathroom. Turning the water on to warm up, he stripped the rest of his clothes before stepping under the spray trying to wipe you from his brain as he felt his body stir at that barest of thought of you. Using all countless tactics he had used while sharing space with other men in the barracks earlier in his career, Sy willed himself to calm down, his hardon subsiding for the time being. Touching himself at the thought of you was not going to solve anything. If nothing else, it would make things worse for him, of that he was certain. Flipping the hot off completely at the end of the shower, he stood under the cold spray to the count of 60.

With a shiver he cut the water and grabbed for his towel, searching his brain for what he was going to do with his Saturday. He had spent the past few with you, and he was certain he had left things unattended to, though he currently couldn't think of anything outside of checking on you. Wrapping the towel around his waist, he headed to the kitchen, grabbing the phone to find the super unpersonal thumbs up from you. “Fuck you too,” he muttered under his breath, tossing the phone aside again. He swept your coffee cup off the table, emptying it and the coffee pot in the sink.

Monday morning came with little fanfare for Aaran Syverson. He had spent the weekend finding all manner of things to wipe you off of his brain, knowing he couldn’t do anything about you or this growing feeling until you worked out whatever happened on Saturday morning. He hit the gym on base, pressing himself to his limits, driving the unwelcome thoughts of what you were going through without him from his brain. Sunday he was paying for it, though he would never admit it to anyone else, his joints aching, his muscles just this side of painful. What he also wouldn't admit to anyone else was that his phone was always just an arms reach away, all day Sunday as he mowed his meticulously already mowed lawn on Thursday evening. Once that was done, he tried to banish you by binging on some tv show a station was playing back to back to back. But all he accomplished there was demolishing a six pack.

Checking his phone when he woke on the couch Monday, he let out a pained exhale and bit the bullet, sending a text asking if you were ok and if he could come over after work so you two could talk. “Whatever this is isn't good for either of us any more,” he reasoned out loud to himself.

He arrived early that morning to work, beating everyone else by almost 45 minutes. He spent the time going through the mound of paperwork in his inbox, administrative stuff he hated about being the leader of a team and had pushed aside to deal with another day. The fact that “another day” arrived should have told anyone around him something was wrong, but his team didn’t seem to notice. Or did notice and chose not to say anything.

Ten minutes before it was time to meet his men to start their day, his superior officer walked into his office, informing Sy that he and his team were to be in the debrief room at quarter after the hour, giving him little else to go on. And maybe that’s why his men didn’t notice anything was going on with him, they too didn’t expect a mission briefing first thing on Monday morning. The rest of the day was spent prepping equipment and themselves to go out first thing Tuesday morning.

Syverson spent Monday night laying on the couch staring at the darkened living room ceiling. He didn’t allow himself to even think about the reasoning why he hadn’t slept in his own bed the past 3 nights. His only hope -that clearly had absolutely no bearing on why he was on the couch again- was that your scent will have completely disappeared from his bed linens by the time he returned, whenever that was.

As soon as he got to base the next morning, he sent you a text informing you of his departure. “I got your message that you don’t want to talk to me loud and clear. I just wanted to let you know that I’m heading out on a mission, and I do not know how long I’ll be gone. If when I return I have not heard from you, I promise I will respect your wishes and refrain from contacting you again.”

With one last disappointing look at his messages, he shut down his phone, throwing it into the glove box of his truck. Biting the inside of his cheek, he opened the door and dropped his booted feet to the ground, grabbing his go bag out of the back seat before slamming the door. With a deep grounding breath, and another one following it, Sy tried to shift his focus from you to the mission. He had to or he would compromise the lives of his men. The intel they had on this was limited, and if he didn’t get his brain in line, someone was going to get hurt or worse. The teams, all of them really, were already reeling from Clay and the others’ accident and even though the US Army denied any involvement of their actions, that was to be expected in the world of the Special Forces. Though they were all elte trained, they all knew they could wing up just escape goats for the US government if it was needed. Sy and other officers who had been close to any of the members in Clay’s team knew in their heart of hearts that’s what had happened, that The Losers did nothing wrong. They had seen other teams take the fall for US military failures.

If Sy wanted to keep his own men safe and from seeing the others too soon, he needed to drop you from his mind and focus on the task at hand.

Roughly four days later, though Sy wasn’t even sure how many days they truly were gone with the time zone changes and copious amount of flight time, he was back on the ground in North Carolina. After the team was debriefed and released, Sy and a couple of the guys were walking to their vehicles, packs slung over their shoulders, chatting about their plans for the weekend.

“Hey Captain,” Anthony called as Sy unlocked his truck, his fingers itching to grab his phone and see if he’s heard anything from you.

With an unsteady exhale, Sy turns his head to his second. “Yeah?”

Anthony stopped at the front fender of the truck, glancing to see if the other men were out of ear shot before he continued. “Do me a favor, man?” the slighter man asked.

“What’s that?” Sy questioned, truly unaware of what was about to be asked of him.

“Can you figure out your pussy problem this weekend?”

Sy’s eyes narrowed and he saw red, his fist curling around the door frame. That was the last thing he expected from Anthony. Yeah, you were never very far from the forefront of Sy’s brain the last few days but outside of one slip up that got no one even hurt let alone killed, Sy thought he had it under wraps.

“Next time we get called, it may not be a drill, it may wind up being the real deal, ya know?” the younger man said. “Whoever this new chick is, she’s got your brain messed up, man. Others may not see it, or may be too scared of you to say shit, but I see you are not firing on all cylinders. Gotta be cuz of a woman. You don’t get like this often. Last time was what’s her face, Sh-“

“I don’t need to be reminded of her name, Lieutenant,” Sy snapped. He remembered the last woman that had his brain in a twist. The one he was sweet on before they deployed to Baqubah, the one who promised to wait for him. The one who waited all of 2 weeks before sending the Dear John letter. Shit the way the mail system worked when they were deployed, it was likely she dropped it in the mail box on her way home from saying goodbye to him before his flight.

You were nothing like her. You were leagues beyond her, better than her. You had more heart in your little finger than Sy’s ex had in her uncaring whole body.

The other officer stood staring at Sy, waiting for an answer. He hated that Anthony knew him so well as to know when his brain was elsewhere. He guessed that’s why they worked so well together. Also explained why Anthony picked up some slack on the training op.

“I’ll get it together,” Sy promised, if for no other reason then to make the man back the fuck off and go home. “I’ll see you on Monday.” Sy slammed the truck door after tossing his pack into the back seat. Cranking the key in the ignition, Sy dropped his truck into reverse, throwing his wrap-around sunglasses on his face as he sped off towards home, needing a shower and to check his phone.

Before he even got out of the truck in his driveway, he booted up his phone. His heart pounded as he saw a notification of a voice mail message. Clicking play, Sy was as damn near to tears as he had been in a long time. It was Cougar’s mom inviting him for dinner tonight. It wasn’t you offering a single hint of what was going on in your head.

Sy vowed then and there to let you go. He was far too wrapped up in you and your heartache to be healthy for himself. He needed to think about himself for once. Your silence told him to back off, and he had no choice to do it, for both of you.

General Tag List: @littleone65, @mysweetlittledesire @jvanilly

BBTF Tag List: @mis-lil-red @sconnie-doesnt-know, @ronearoundlightly

HC Tag LIst: @m07belzen, @used-to-be-bourbonwithice, @hawklin, @geralts-yenn @summersong69

Syverson tag list: @mrsevans90

if you wish to be added or removed from tag lists let me know.

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ctrlgrlblog · 8 months

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𝐈𝐜𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐬𝐬.

Ice Spice tries to play this mysterious game with her persona, It's like playing tug-of-war with your personality in a way with people that want to know more about you but instead she's the only one yanking the rope. Ice spice became huge from TikTok with her drill inspired song "Munch", And you know how TikTok has the power to inspire the billboards and music charts. TikTok became notorious for making 5 seconds of a song sound good but the rest of the 3-4 minute song kinda bland. With her first song blowing up on TikTok she soon became the newest hot topic but not in music or bars but really for her sex appeal. With people blowing her song up and sharing it she started to take off from there and got to do a corny barbie girl drill remix with nicki minaj who rarely gives out collabs with female rappers and only did it with Ice Spice to eat off of the momentum and push that ice spice was getting in the industry. And of course Ice Spice being hispanic and mixed with a light complexion she got all the attention on her because all industries and most of the world is colorist and because she has a fat ass because that's what she had to offer really. She can't rap or sing but she can twerk and look hot.

Ice Spice is really just a TikTok rapper who got out of the Bronx luckily off of her looks and age. Watching her performances are just bland and dry as fuck because she doesn't do any moving around just her usual combo moves of bending over, twerking, touching her ass/boobs, and flicking her dry tongue. Ice Spice does not have any talent or real music that comes from the heart, She's just a cheap industry plant like Cardi B that the music industry have put infront of us to distract us. Her and Cardi B both believe that they were hand plucked from the Bronx and chosen to represent their city out of the masses but really they aren't doing enough for the city they came from. They're really just stealing their originality and personality and raunchy-ness from the Bronx. You would've thought that Ice Spice would've done a song with Cardi B, but instead she did it with Nicki Minaj and the song was just kinda trash because it sounded so rushed and there were no memorable bars or anything that showed that she had some talent.

When Apple Music asked her to describe her music she vaguely described it as a vibe. I couldn't vibe to her song even if it was being played in Walgreens. She then went on to say

"It's for the Baddies that get it, for the confident people, for the people that get money. It's just music to feel good too, to get ready to, to work out to"

I can see the workout aspect of her music but not really the other bs she must've said high on her confusion. Ice Spice went on to release her 6 track debut EP Like...? (Her favorite catchphrase in between bars that she says when because she can't rap and gets confused.) The way Ice Spice raps is equivalent to a 6th grader rapping, She did a really weird song with Taylor Swift called karma that really flopped. because without her regular producer giving her an impromptu drill beat to rap on she sounds kinda like a really big joke. Her and Taylor Swift's song was just really bad timing for them to have a song together, Especially after Matty Healy made a very racist and insensitive joke about her and her looks while he was fucking Taylor Swift and pretending to be a good posh buy when really he is a ciggarette smoking bum with nice hair.

Overall, Ice Spice is an industry plant. A cleaner and kidz bop version of Sexy Redd that kids sing in the car and their parents won't get mad because hey she doesn't rap about sucking dick & hasn't had a sex tape exposed yet so she's safe for now. Ice Spice hasn't released any real music, Just another girl trying to do drill rap and get money off of mediocre music is what the world and the black community see.

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canonmisogynyvictimstournament · 8 months

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PROPAGANDA

STARFIRE (DC COMICS) (CW: Sex Trafficking)

1.) She is frequently put down in the og 80s comics due to being more expressive and open with her emotions, and ever since the og she has frequently been painted as just eyecandy (ignoring her sexual trauma) when her character is so incredibly complex. Special mention goes to red hood and the outlaws (2011) (written by a sexual harasser) for just terrible stand out awful reasons which will be seen in the below photos and her 2015 solo for combining her vapid portrayal there with her cartoon quirkiness to culminate in a trash comic that is just her basically being the born sexy yesterday trope.

2.) 2011 reboot, in RHATO she was turned into a walking fetish by retconning most parts of her character and erasing all personality displayed in the past 30 years of comics. in that iteration she is only interested in sex and is dehumanised and ‘exotic’. she ‘forgot’ all her past relationships because she doesn’t care about them only sex. her only purpose in that book is as a powerhouse and a sex/love interest for one of the male characters who view her as a trophy because she used to date someone he dislikes (in this continuity) let’s also not forget that she was first created just to be a love interest and although she did grow into a hood character at some point, she is treated horribly time and time again by writers because of conflicting ships. she’s written as a ‘vixen’ as opposed to another ‘good girl’ female character who is shipped with the same guy in canon

3.) Her original characterization was fairly decent, however it still had her stuck in relationships with men that weren’t very good for her and had overtones of racism with how she was written. Post that her characterization was slowly chipped away at, some writers with harder sledgehammers than others, culminating in current writing where she’s dismissed as “just a fling” to her original counterpart (Dick Grayson) to prop up a different ship (Dick Grayson/Barbara Gordon) and frequently has been used as eye candy in other comics. Simply open the first comic of Red Hood and the Outlaws, which obliterated her personality to make her associate/be subservient to the Red Hood, and you’ll find plenty of panels of her appearing simply for eye candy in the boobs and butt pose for absolutely no reason. This is not the only time she’s been used to cater to the male gaze (I’d argue even in her original context that was part of her appeal) but in this comic she essentially has no personality beyond “i want sex” as her memory of all past events has been erased. She’s essentially just a tool for her male counterparts in the comic to bounce off of, and eye candy to bring more male readers in. She does eventually get more storylines later on, but that doesn’t excuse the bad writing she was put through. Her own solo series also cashes in on her sex appeal, by infantilizing at the same time as drawing her in skimpy outfits + more boobs and butt poses galore to go for the “born sexy yesterday” misogynistic trope.

MARWA (WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS (TV SERIES)) (CW: Mind Control, Domestic Abuse)

1.) okok so a major character (nandor) uses a genie wish to bring back the 37 wives he had when he was human (he’s a vampire who was turned in the 1400s but is alive in the modern day) to pick his favorite to live with and settles on marwa. she’s established as someone who’s passionate about science and mathematics, but nandor uses his genie wishes to essentially mold her into his perfect woman like a doll, from changing her hair color to making her not want to go to the night market with him to making her like all the things he likes. this culminates in him LITERALLY TRANSFORMING HER INTO A BRITISH MAN NAMED FREDDIE and that is her send off from the show. the treatment of her is disgusting i’m sorry for ranting i love wwdits but honestly the whole thing left a bad taste in my mouth

2.) WHERE TO START my god. Marwa is introduced into the story as one of a crowd of women who are interchangeable to the man summoning them, WHO IS HER CANONICAL HUSBAND but he gives less than half a fuck about her, which is played for laughs. The writers made it completely unclear whether she is a real person or basically a magical simulation with no inner life and did not bother to clarify that at any point. Her plotline consists of her husband using magical wishes to modify various aspects of her body and mind and the writers never explore whether she is aware this is happening or not, much less how she might be experiencing it. It is a terrifying psychological horror story from her perspective but we are not given any insight into her perspective so who cares I guess!! For example, he wishes for her to have a rounder ass and then wishes that all of her preferences align perfectly with his own, so that she’ll stop nagging him about wanting different colored flowers at their wedding than him. There are SEVERAL more examples. Her experience of having all of her desires replaced with her husband’s desires shows up only for jokes, plus one moment that is used to confirm that her husband’s real love interest is one of the other male leads in the show. (I ship the two male characters, I’m not complaining about that, but like COME ON SHE WAS A HUMAN PERSON ONCE AND SHE IS LIVING IN A HORROR MOVIE AND THIS IS WHAT YOU’RE DOING WITH THAT???) THE WORST PART is that when it’s time for her to exit the story because her body and personality have already been essentially replaced by magic and she is now a boring toy, she is LITERALLY PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY transformed into a random British man so that her husband can have that guy as a love interest instead of her. She (he? It? Again it is never NEVER explored whether Marwa is like, alive inside this British man’s mind somehow? Or if she was ever really alive in her body?) moves to England to be in love with the original British man she was based off of, so basically her twin. This is also played for laughs. Her entire personality and body are not even killed off with like a death scene but literally ERASED FROM REALITY AND REPLACED WITH A COPY OF THIS SHITTY WHITE DUDE.

3.) (Context: Nandor is a vampire who has been alive for a while. When he was human he had 37 wives. (Btw some of the wives were men but that’s besides the point.))

She was brought back to life (along with a couple others) via Djinn wish just because Nandor wanted to have a ‘wife’ (some of the ‘wives’ are men). After being deemed the ‘best wife’ by Nandor she is the only one left alive. It is clear the entire fourth season that Nandor doesn’t care for her much and she is only there because Nandor wants to be married to someone. He ignores her wants and interests the whole season. Via another Djinn wish Nandor makes Marwa like everything he likes so she is more agreeable with him. Later on, he meets another character’s boyfriend named Freddie. Nandor basically falls for Freddie immediately and via Djinn wish, wishes Marwa to be exactly Freddie. :| With that wish, Marwa is effectively gone. She now looks and acts like Freddie. The two Freddies meet and after freaking out a little (and some magic) they get along because they like the same exact things. By the end of the season both Freddies are sent off to never be seen again. Also, Nandor has some extra Djinn wishes so he could’ve turned Marwa back but he didn’t.

Additional links: Article about the Freddie thing:

She likes what he likes:

Also This:

#polls #round 3 #week 5 #new #cw sex trafficking #cw mind control #cw domestic abuse

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mermaidsirennikita · 5 months

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Speaking of adam driver performances, which do you think were his best overall?

The Man Who Killed Don Quixote is actually my favorite Adam Driver movie, even though no one but me and my friends has seen it and also the director is... a bad dude.

But yeah, I think that movie really plays to something he hasn't done as much of lately, which is comedy--he has a manic energy in a lot of it, he plays against Jonathan Pryce (who also gives an incredible performance, it's a great movie) super well, and it's just like... Humor, drama, intensity, surreality, ludicrousness. And he gets to be hot at points! A win.

This is Where I Leave You is another one where he's performing but again, really funny. I wish he'd do more funny stuff, he's honestly really good at it.

LOL CONTROVERSIAL BUT BRAVE he was great in TLJ. That's the only movie where he was able to play Kylo Ren the way he should've been able to play him the whole time (I mean... I guess he did in TFA, but I'm meh on that movie in general and he wore the helmet a lot more in that one. The final lightsaber battle was great though. He was freaking crazy in that scene.) The physicality, the semi-faux little boy lost villainy, the weird tension that he used against Rey which only would've worked on Rey because they were both virgins who couldn't drive... I think TFA is bleh and TROS is HORRENDOUS and TLJ is basically the only non-OT SW movie I love. Rian Johnson was the only person who seemed to get that you could have Kylo Ren be a horrible trash human villain and a person with pathos, which is WILD considering the MOVIES THIS FRANCHISE WAS BUILT ON. It's honestly tragic that Adam wasn't able to go full force after TLJ, because in this movie, he's playing a fabulous villain. If it was up to me, Rey would've killed him in TROS and it would've been very "we could've had it all but you were in fact Evil Sexy not Good Sexy" but whatever I guess he's gonna show up in his pajamas and have zero dialogue and be good and shit.

Look, he's obviously great in Marriage Story but otherwise I hate that movie. He's fabulous in Silence but you can only see that once in your life imo.

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alfietalksaboutcomics · 1 year

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Blood, Butts, And Gore, X-Terminators Review

X-Terminators by Leah Williams and Carlos Gomez is such a pleasant surprise that I'm frankly I’m shocked it made it to print, but thank god it did. X-Terminators is a mini-series about a bunch of messy bitches killing vampires and having fun while doing it. It's a complete and utter joy.

X-Terminators is an undeniably sexy series, it’s horney and it knows it. What makes the sexualization in X-Terminators so great where other stories of this kind sometimes fail is that it isn't objectifying our female characters, this kind of story doesn't need to be sexist or objectifying. X-Terminators is celebrating these characters and their sexiness, they are enjoying themselves and the story shows them respect, it doesn’t feel like they are sexy for the sake of the reader so much as it’s them just having fun.

The characters have such great chemistry, there are just so many fun interactions between them that it's infectious. Jubilee and Boom-Boom are trash-talking, playing around and poking the other's buttons. Laura plays straight women to the rest of the cast but she does have chemistry with Jubilee which feels flirtatious. Dazzler is the slightly older leader of the group. They’re all just having such fun, the vibes are great!

Another aspect of the comic that I find to be a delight is the creative use of powers, like Boom-Boom shoving her bombs down the mouth of a Vampire while Jubilee punches her fist into another one and sets off fireworks blowing it up from the inside.

But my favorite use of powers is when Jubilee uses her pyrotechnic abilities to split an atom inside of herself, turning herself into an atomic bomb.

While the writing and art are spectacular and deserve so much praise, one thing I’d like to mention is the lettering by Travis Lanham. What’s so good about the sound effects in X-Terminators is how it perfectly amplifies what's on the page, drawing the reader in by invoking a real sense, it makes the scenes more tangible. While I could pick so many examples I’ll at least show one example of the great sound effects in action.

The lettering perfectly works with the art to sell the horrible noise made by the claws on glass, it's so effective it hurts.

Overall I’m so happy that X-Terminators came out and would highly recommend it to anyone who hasn’t read it. The last issue promises we’ll get more X-Terminators which personally I don’t think can come soon enough.

#comics #x men comics #xmen #mutants #wolverine #x23 #laura kinney #dazzler #jubilee #jubilation lee #boom boom #x terminators

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neattequila · 1 year

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Harry's Style Evolution (by an actual stylist) Part 3: Fine Line Era! Part 2 of 2*

Gorlies I can't believe I hit pic limit on the first Fine Line Era post (I can believe it, I have so much to say.)

Anyway this is Harry's Style evolution part THREE part TWO (like how they made Breaking Dawn two movies ya get me?)

*PLEASE read part 1 first. That is linked HERE!

2020

January of 2020 feels like it was a lifetime ago, but here we are. Fine Line the album just came out in December and after preforming the full album twice, once in LA and once in London. Harry's back in London for award season.

The pics aren't revealed til later but H rings in the New Year in the INFAMOUS "But Daddy I Love Him" shirt <3

Later in January arrives at Radio one in a gorgeous Bode jacket carrying Gucci's Jackie purse.

But girls (gender neutral) get comfy because it's time for the Brit Awards and the look we need to talk about is this one.

LISTEN!!! The girls that get it GET IT! Because this was EVERYTHING EVERYTHING!!!

To DATE I think this is the best award show look he's ever worn, contending only with the leather suit at the Grammy. I really thought this was going to be the new style. It's sexy, it's slightly punk, it's BRIT POP references chock full!

The Mary Janes, the Brown suit with the purple sweater and blue lace color with the pearls and the HAIR! THE BRIT POP PUNK HAIR! This was *chefs kiss* I am absolutely devastated that we never got anything like her again.

Also at the Brit Awards he wears this yellow suit paired with purple necktie, and Treat People With Kindness pin. For his beautiful falling performance he wears a full lace ensemble including gloves. This night is also includes my blog name's origins.

Fine Line promo continues and Harry wears a myriad of cozy outfits.

In New York he wears a JW Anderson cardigan, later to become TikTok famous with the "Be Healthy, Eat Your Honey" shirt and Gucci jeans. Later he wears another sweater vest (staple of the FL Era,) and for NPR's Tiny Desk he wears a Gucci mohair sweater.

At the beginning of the end March 2020 Harry's shoot for Beauty Papers comes out. One of my FAVORITE editorials he's ever in.

These photos are gorgeous, camp, sexy, kind of eerie. He's photographed and directed by Casper Sejersen who I think absolutely killed it. Beauty Papers always has amazing queer camp shoots and I highly recommend paying attention to them.

The world goes into lockdown and H releases the previously recorded "Watermelon Sugar" music video "Dedicated to touching."

Most of the ensemble is Gucci but some pieces were vintage thrifted including the loose-knit tank (right.)

Harry grows out his facial hair and becomes even sexier somehow.

Like fr. This is the hottest he's ever been. Left he wears a hoodie that he made himself printed with photographs of philosopher Alain de Botton, and paired with the vintage military jacket he was wearing in Japan during 2019. Middle I just think this pic of him is so hot, and right he wears a custom Bode shirt.

September 2020 Harry becomes the first man to ever be on the cover of Vogue!

Y'all I was so excited when this first came out. So imagine when I opened the magazine and saw the absolute trash outfits they put him in for it. Like literally all of these outfits are some of the worst he's ever worn. Like honey clean up! Vogue is here!

The only piece I adored from this whole shoot was the custom Bode pants. Bode has a chokehold on me and I wish Harry L would've featured more of them in this shoot.

In October of 2020...

The MV for Golden is released after being filmed in Italy and heavily features both Gucci and S.S. Daley pieces. The Eliou necklaces he covets make their first official debut in this video as well.

In November he films (released in December) this performance for iHeartRadio. He's wearing head to toe Gucci with a custom Eliou necklace. His hair and this performance is so dreamy. (Left)

He also starts filming Don't Worry Darling *crowd boos* and among his cozy on set looks this is my favorite. The pictures of him this day really made me go gaga. He wears a Free & Easy shirt paired with Elder Statesmen sweatpants and New Balance sneakers.

2021

It's 2021 baby! Harry rings in the new year by releasing the video for TPWK with Phoebe Waller Bridge

We're jumping to March 2021, I'm scared to hit pic limit again lol, with the GRAMMYS!

Harry wore three! outfits to the Grammy's where he took home his first ever Grammy for Song of the Year. All three looks were Gucci and all featured feather boas which he never wore again! Which is odd because it really seemed like it was going to be a tour staple, but wasn't!

Throughout the summer and into fall his personal style is very casual, this makes sense. We're still in a pandemic and everyone is trending to a more casual fit sense. I had to include the pink beanie because every time I remember that it's $112 I go inside. Girl I got the same one for like $10 from Forever21 5 years ago!

April/May

In April Harry stars in a Gucci campaign along with many other celebs (left,) he also attends the Brit awards in May (Right) wearing a Gucci ensemble that isn't bad but is nothing to write home about. This is the first time we see him in Gucci Gazelle sneakers which will later become a staple.

September the long awaited Love on Tour officially starts!

The tour kicks off in Las Vegas with a fun sparkly Gucci outfit, and continues with these suspender/open shirts/high waisted pants that we saw on the Fine Line cover. These outfits are underwhelming but do ultimately make sense.

The tour outfits really do blend together, the full collection can be found HERE, so here are three of my favorites <3

We'll end our Fine Line coverage with the first annual Harryween!

Harry wore custom Gucci ensembles for both, one dressing as Dorothy and one dressing as a pierrot.

Next is Harry's House Era!

Thank you again for all the love, and for bearing with me when I had to split these into two parts!

AGAIN PART ONE IS HERE!

See you next time <3

#harry styles #harryween #gucci #styling #stylist #idk #more #fine line #part 2!

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grapecaseschoices · 1 year

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Top 5 shows that deserved at least one more season

thanks hun!

SELFIE. DAS IT!!

That show was funny. It was cute. John Cho is sexy. Him and Karen had good chemistry. It had such potential for growth that NO ONE allowed it to have. I remain bitter. I still read fic from it sometimes.

2) Oh, goodness. What do I watch? Still Star Crossed

The show that introduced me to Lashna Lynch (and Medalion Rahimi as well as Ebonee Noel), for that alone it deserves recognition. But I really can't believe that a sight that claims to love bickering enemies to lovers, who claims to love Brandy's Cinderella let this flop.

3) The Secret Circle

It was trash. But guess what? So was TVD and that nonsense got how many sequels? I liked the characters better, enough said. I liked the dynamics between the teens, I didn't dislike or was 'neutral' about the White Female Lead (though, of course, she wasn't my favorite). I could've done with a touch less of the adults but I won't lie I wasn't against seeing the mommy & daddy issues (and the terrible things we do for love, etc.)

4) Minority Report

I DON'T CARE WHAT ANYBODY SAYS! I liked it! I don't even know why I bothered watching this show. It was on Fox and it had a black female lead. This show is so low, because I don't remember the plot points as tightly as the others -- but I loved it so much that I live tweeted to give it attention.

5) This can't be an accurate list because I have crap memory. Now I know why I rarely get asks for memes like this one, because yall all know my memory is shit wertrew show accurate can such a list be. UMMMMM. HRM! Oh, shit. The thing is a lot of my fave shows get canceled after season TWO lmao.

Oh! 👏🏾 The Passage. Yet another Mark-Paul Gosselaar show Fox did dirty.

Admittedly, I stopped watching it because I knew how it was going to go. But I was really into it at first -- and given I don't usually like post-apocalyptic that's saying something. The young actress that played Amy was AMAZING. I was so into their dynamic. As well as their separate pasts. It had such potential. It had so much that I enjoyed: Don't trust the shady agency. Slowly and mutually begrudging but eventually deeply loyal people who become family after being thrown together (especially when it involves sharp kid and guy with heavy past). Can you really trust who you think you can trust? Machinations (but more of a personal affair, but in a bigger scale too). Black girl being deeply loved and worth protecting.

"Top Five"

#andthatisnotfake #grapes chars #selfie #still star crossed #the secret circle #the minority report #the passage #honorable mention: pitch and that show with the guy whose dad was a serial killer #grapecase watches #.... i guess #grapecase answers #long post

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absolutebl · 2 years

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This Week in BL - Japan WINS

July 2022 Wk 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying the most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Triage (grey) Ep 9-11 - I got caught up! Finally we switched POV to Tol. I’ve been waiting for this. Also more time with the side characters - who knew Sing is a total badass, and a great actor? I guess it’s OK that Tin is mostly absent or in a coma. One of the greatest things about this drama is that all of the characters are complex but not necessarily likable more pleasingly flawed. TinTol give a great mutual kiss. (Look some of us have been waiting 5 years for it!) Episode 10 Slayed me! The twist on the person fixing the timeline was very clever. Jinta = The ultimate BL Shipper: turns back time so his boys can be cannon. Also teaching Tol a lesson in forgiveness and communication.This is a CLEVER show.

Love Mechanics (Sun WeTV) Ep 3 - My messy cheeky drama-llama boys are back in spades. I’m enjoying this more than I should. It’s crazy to compare to Check Out because they are basically the same premise airing at the same time, but LM is just SO MUCH better. YinWar sheesh, why so good? Seriously tho, Vee you bisexual identity crisis is going to break this poor little gay boy, you georious flirty cheating fucker.

Unforgotten Night (Weds on GaGa) Ep 3 - boring ep this week, nothing happened, not even one leathery whiff of BDSM, this is my sad face. TRASH WATCH REBORN!

Sky in Your Heart (Fri YouTube) Ep 6 - How they managed to make aggressive courting, one of my favorite tropes, still boring defeats me. That said: sick and needy Dao was cute. Meanwhile, Prince is an actual prince, who saw that coming? Everybody. Their kisses are sweet, tho. Having 2 faen fatals for Prince is a bit much, I mean I like both actors but...

Thai linguistics corner: If you want to hear frozen register spoken, that’s what Prince’s maa speaks to tease Fah in this ep.

On a different note I think both these shows would have been VASTLY improved by cutting each set back to 6 eps each and then cross cutting between the two couples like the Why R U? or Dark Blue Kiss approach with 12 eps total. Just call the whole thing Star & Sky. Each couple would have been less boring and frustrating if focus were split, and the pacing would have been a lot better too. Why do I have to tell GMMTV how to do their fucking job?

Even Sun (Wed iQIYI) Ep 2 - the language is fun in this one (they too switched to chan/nai so I’m guessing it’s and organized crime thing), the cast is excellent, the boxers mildly interest me (no, not that kind) and BounPrem’s chemistry is unmatched, but... I still don’t like it. *shrug*

Check Out (Sat IQIYI) Ep 5 - Candy is THE MOST confusing character. But this show is just messy, it’s not even hot. Sigh.

My Secret Love (Sat YouTube Sat) Ep 6 - honestly I only still watch this because I have a checklist of bad BLs to get through on Saturday before I post this and this is on it. It did get sexy more and faster than I was expecting.

Oh My Sunshine Night (?) - Ep 1 I admit I didn’t try very hard to find this. OhmFluke are one of my original biases, but honestly this looks to be yet another one of their serious+sad+meaty ones. While I love that they are handed high drama (because they are one of the few Thai pairs that can legitimately handle it) it’s not what I enjoy in my BL. I might wait until I know how it ends and binge later? Not sure what to do here.

For me, most of the Thai stuff is pretty lackluster right now.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Minato Shouji Coin Laundry (Japan Weds GaGa) Ep 2 - oh it is GREAT but I spent the scallop scene upset about the one left on the grill turning rubbery. Beautiful 17-year-olds are all very well and good but don’t fucking overcook seafood! Shin is the most aggressive flirt ever. Baby boi is persistent, gotta give him that. Minato is gonna have to hurt him bad to cut him lose. I don’t want that but this is Japan, they will probubly go there, don’t get comfy - never forget Japan’s brand is, in the end, emo.

JAPANESE LINGUISTIC CORNER: I gotta say one of the things I am LOVING about this drama is that gaga is giving us names+honorifics in the captions. Shin call’s Minato-san appropriately but Minato runs the gamut. I mean he fucked up from the get go going so casual with Shin he dropped not just to no honorifics but to a nickname. To be fair, with a 10 year age gap Minato can do whatever he wants, but also Minato kinda gave Shin license to crush with such casual informal affection from the start. (The fact that Shin saved Minato in his phone as Akira though - boy’s got balls fursure.) But it’s Minato jumping between Shin, Shin-kun (annoyed and/or formal distancing) and Shin-chan (childish and demeaning) in some sort of desperate attempt to grapple with his own feelings that I love SO MUCH. Honestly, this is like a master class in use of Japanese honorifics from all angles and as an intimate part of narrative. I can’t wait to see what Minato calls Shin next...

Senpai, Danjite Koidewa! (Japan Fri Viki) Ep 3 - look, I admit it, like SCOY this dynamic (super awkward pining uke) is one of my least favorites - high cringe factor. I prefer a pining seme for power differential reasons. I mean this dynamic has been done okay (see the yaoi Desire) but only really when the seme is a bumbling sunshine himbo type. This one is just painfully awkward and cringey. I’m sticking it out though, because I can’t fault Japan’s quality, moot pining is better than single sided, plus it got HELLA kinky allasudden (that submissive fantasy in A TEMPLE?). Okay so there is a priest kink, this is the first time I have seen a version of that in a BL. Everyone say “thank you Japan for slipping more kink into this dumb office set sweet romance than Thailand’s billed BDSM drama has in its little finger.”

Love in Spring AKA Spring of Crush (Korea grey) Ep 14 Oh it is not good but also weirdly fun in an old-fashioned way, like Hercules or Xena level of acting and quality. I understand it ends as either bromance or there’s no/dead fish kiss. So my expectations are really low. Want to See You (Vietnam YT) Ep 6 - I’m behind, I’ll get caught up tomorrow. Talk to @heretherebedork about it.

Plus & Minus (Taiwan Viki & Gaga) Spe 13 SPECIAL - Drunken husbands after the wedding was very cute, then there were some flashbacks and an odd cross dressing dream. It’s fine if you want more time with the main couple, but doesn’t add anything to the story. Not necessary to watch. The rest of the “eps” are actually just bts. (full review here)

Finished this Week

Old Fashion Cupcake (Japan Mon Viki) Ep 5fin - I very much loved this, but I found ep 5 a tiny bit of a let down. It reverted back to pretty standard light Japanese live action yaoi, of the style I talk about here. I did expect a bit more intimacy from this one: at least showing the two of them cuddling in bed together or something super domestic, if not kissing. I get why they brought it back around to pancakes but this is me, I wanted more sexy. I wanted to see Togawa’s thirst satiated. I’m not surprised or upset, this is still an amazing, comforting, unexpected gem of a show, but it’s not the 10/10 I thought it was going to be at the end of 4. Solid & watchable. 9/10 Full review here. DEFINITELY RECOMMENDED

KinnPorsche (Sat iQIYI) Ep 14fin - FINAL THOUGHTS: VegasPete were in one drama; KimChay were in another; KinnPorsche were in each of those randomly but then sometimes in their own extremely slapstick cheese-fest alt-reality + Tankhun. There were clearly 2 directors with 2 distinct and conflicting points of view, who apparently never had a single conversation with each other. Was this show good? Nope. Was it absorbing as fuck? Sure. Was it well acted, absolutely. Were the sex scenes great? Yes. We the fight scenes awesome? Actually yeah (special props to Jeff for the hand-to-hand stuff). Did I enjoy the kinky bits? Certainly. But all that said: the VegasPete universe of KP was the only universe I really enjoyed and would like to revisit, and I only got that 1/5 of the time. Thus mathematics dictates that I, at least, am still waiting for the perfect mafia BL. I think it might be up to Japan at this juncture. Gevn fan fervor, I don’t really know how to judge this show but I have to go with my heart, and KP didn’t win it. 7/10 No full review here on tumbr but I did post one to MDL. RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS (some of them around the fandom)

To My Star 2 (Korea Viki) Ep 9-10fin - this was never going to be my favorite, too much pain, not enough payout but there IS payout and it does end happily, the finale was lovely. Did they talk enough for me to think they won’t still have problems - no. But for some it really worked. 7/10 Full Review here (I just updated my original TMS review, since the two must be watched together). RECOMMENDED WITH SERIOUS RESERVATIONS

Gossip

GMMTV is doing *something* with the holy trinity (SingtoKrist, TayNew, OffGun - yes Singto is back, although he hasn’t rejoined the stable) + the scions (BrightWin). They’re being uninformatively annoyingly secretive about it and I don’t do weird Thai promo stuff. But it’s on their YT channel.

Fluke Natouch (OhmFluke UWMA etc...) & Judo (The Miracle Of Teddy Bear) to star in the upcoming WaGa Creative's medical-fantasy Thai BL, Make A Wish. Has had a read through, no trailer yet.

New Thai BL End of Love announced based on a y-novel of the same name, cast with unknowns.

China rumored to be doing a bromance remake of Addicted Heroin as My Family Won the Lottery where our boys have girlfriends and just SOMEONE STOP THEM.

One of my absolute favorite Japanese BL actors Hio Miyazawa (from His the movie) is rumored to be taking on the lead role in the movie adaptation of Makoto Takayama’s autobiographical novel Egoist to be released 2023. He’ll be opposite super famous actor Ryohei Suzuki. This is about an openly gay but vein and superficial man (Hio) who falls in love with a personal trainer (Ryohei) who is stuck taking care of his sick mother. It’s not BL, it’s gay coming of age and we can’t expect it to end happily. Still, I’ll probubly try to watch it. Japanese movies are notoriously difficult to get ahold of, tho.