#anxiety also sucks

[motherinfinity]

Y’know no one ever really talks about what happens after you recover from depression. Like yeah depression is really shitty but no one talks about how once you recover you randomly get like nostalgic but not in a good way? Like sometimes you just realise you’re happy and get sad because you remember that you didn’t get to feel like that for so long and now that you can it’s kind of confusing? I don’t know how to describe it. Recovery feels amazing but sometimes I get sad for the past me because I know that even though I healed and I’m a lot better now I still won’t ever get that time back. Sometimes I hear a song that I used to cry to and the nostalgia hits and I realise that I’m a completely different person now. I will never be that person again and I never want to be but at the same time I still miss that version of myself. Maybe it’s my crippling fear of change but I think people need to recognise that even though some people may have recovered from depression it doesn’t mean they’re completely better.

[lazylittledragon]

do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great

i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually

[sanchoyoscribbles]

older tmm girls with upgraded outfits!

been wanting to do smth like this for a while and ended up just…sketching them all. Oops. I wanted them to look similar to the originals, simple to draw, still cohesive as a group, too, but also have like. Hints to their foods and DNA in the designs? Also I wanted to draw Gowns. Very self indulgent designs 😌

[normystical]

ATTENTION ALL ALASTOR SHIPPERS: 

uniromantic 

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. PROCEED

[why-the-heck-not]

a productive all-nighter starts by making a clear to do list & getting to work spending an hour or so searching for the music that hits the vibe just right

[angfdz]

have you ever heard the story of the man who was running from the wolves and fell off the edge of the cliff? He managed to hold on to a root sticking out of the ground. Above him, the hungry wolves. Below him, razor sharp rocks and the ocean. Next to him is a patch of strawberries.

when you tell this story you're supposed to ask the person you tell it to "what do you do?" and they can offer you a variety of solutions & you will say, to each of them, that no, it is impossible. But there is an answer to "what do you do" and it's "eat the strawberries".

so i feel like, that's been on my mind lately because falling in love has been the experience of getting chased by wolves & falling off a cliff & hanging over razor sharp rocks and ice cold ocean water, but there's a patch of strawberries next to me

only, there are no wolves, there is no cliff, there is no ice cold ocean water or sharp rocks beneath me. there are only strawberries. but my mind is convinced about the other thing you know? it's convinced. so i'm holding a handful of strawberries, eating them while trembling & shaking because I'm about to die

even though i won't die. even though there's only more strawberries to be had.

[outoftoucherlocksholmes]

it occurred to me while backing up procreate files last night that aside from Bad Bisexual Representation Booty Shorts Dio, i never posted any of the things from this canvas i had going for sketches while watching part 3 back in 2022, which is a shame, really

[m-art77]

Do you guys ever think about how if redeemed!Durge pulls out of Gortash’s alliance after returning with Orin’s Netherstone that Gortash literally cannot rationalize their betrayal (and them now trying to kill him) by blaming their urge? Like how much of a complete mindfuck that would be for him. The Dark Urge just told him they’re 100% cured and now they’re trying to kill him? You know, the person who’s always been by their side, their partner in crime, their equal, and their (potential) lover; and now they’re trying to murder him. And prior to the amnesia, Gortash could always rationalize that if The Dark Urge tried to kill him one day that he could hand wave it as “they just couldn’t help themselves anymore” because of Bhaal’s hold on them. It doesn’t mean they wanted to.

But now, Bhaal is gone and The Dark Urge is moving in to kill him. There’s no way to rationalize it as anything else. The only person who ever cared about him is going to kill him, and he’ll die knowing everything they once had is completely gone. The Dark Urge doesn’t remember him. Their love for him died the moment Orin split their skull. The urge isn’t the reason they’re doing this. He’ll die knowing that they hate him.

[deoidesign]

.

[fireboos99]

I literally do not have anything smart to say here, this drawing literally only happened because my siblings were telling me I should post my brainrot doodles on here, and my anxiety-ridden ass couldn't do it, and decided the only solution was to spend days (read: the entire latter end of April) working on a proper drawing because "if I'm going to post anything on tumblr, it better be a full-ass drawing"

[billiewena]

I am really glad we all decided to use the boop feature in abundance together because like. I am deathly afraid of bothering people at all times and never message people as a result but booping just feels so easy and guilt-free because everyone is doing it so nonjudgementally. it just makes me wish every day communication was this easy. and the thing is it probably is, it's just my anxiety say it isn't and it makes an extremely convincing argument.

[villainihavedonethymotheronao3]

I do think people overestimate how mad Fearne is going to be about Orym’s deal. He’s moving in with Nana forever? She loves her Nana! She’s always intended to go back to the Feywild, maybe this moves her schedule up a little… maybe he’s a little further than she’d like, but Nana would never hurt someone Fearne loves. Now she just has to maneuver everyone else in her treasure box of friends back with her and Orym.

[kyluxtrashpit]

So. Stomach update. As I haven’t given one here in a while lmao

After the first month of the medication (plus an ultrasound that came back normal), the reflux problems came right back so I went to another doc. He said okay, here’s more pills, take them twice a day, and we’ll also do a barium swallow x-ray. Also apparently I was being way too careful with food, so the bright side is I can eat most things again (yay) but the downside is I had to cut caffeine completely 100%. And it’s awful

Anyway. I had the barium thing yesterday (it was also awful lmao) and doc called me today with results and. Everything is normal? No signs of inflammation, polyps, GERD, any reflux at all, or an ulcer. Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary

Which like. That sounds great. But while I’m not having the reflux or pain right now I still feel like I’m burping more than usual? And that was one of my symptoms. So he said to finish the pills, taking the last week of them once a day instead of twice, and then see how it goes. And never take NSAIDs again

I hope this just means that I did have an ulcer and maybe it’s just in the final stages of healing and couldn’t be seen, so once I finish the pills it will definitely be gone and I will never have this issue again. But I’m also worried cause like. If my entire upper GI and all my abdominal organs are normal and I never did have an ulcer and there’s no signs of anything else being wrong. Then what the fuck is it? Will it go away? Or is this just my life now? Cause while I’m glad I can eat mostly freely again, ZERO caffeine is just not sustainable

Idk. Maybe I’m getting worked up over nothing and it will be completely gone in ~3 weeks when I finish the pills. I really really hope so. I’m just also really worried that it will come back again and then wtf do I do cause I can’t do this forever and if they can’t find anything wrong with me, then how they hell do I fix it?

[mousegirl-cheerleader]

Hi I have new hair :)

[why-the-heck-not]

Presentation done!!! The birds are singing, sun is shining, life has meaning again etc. That was the last shitty thing for my bachelor’s degree; it’s smooth sailing from here (only writing & coding and nothing too scary/social)

[spaghett-onaplate]

depression is really weird actually wdym i spent 2.5 years of my life in bed