#anyway i cant sleep i really want to but i cant -_-

[ganondoodle]

okay i typed this in a reply but i need to say this more detailed here too, the way totk dealt with horses (and stables) is bad and worse than botw imo (yes i can rant about that too, these weird choices are in every little spot in totk, its almost impressive)

in a game that lets you build cars and stupid flying maschines, towers that shoot you into the stratosphere AND teleporting points all over the place, the chance is already low that you use a horse- though i would be one of them bc i love horses and hate building and didnt find it fun at all-

(also i almost never used any parts i had with me bc you cant put them back and your dumb vehicles despawn as soon as you dont look at them- also a negative thing about that system that reinforces the feeling of actually using it being more punishing than rewarding with the added bonus of the good ol saving your health potions forever problem)

-and something i DID like was that you can have more horses and the ... one.. new color (the lil spots but only AFTER you do that one quest in the spy post)

the stable points seemed like a neat idea, but like so many things, are utterly cheatable, imo the system should have only given you a point when you visit a new stable, so you actually have to go around and visit them all

(also .. add new stables, like mini ones or sth that dont offer beds- you dont need that anyway- so you have more places in which you can get them ... why did they remove some of them anyway, shouldn there be MORE now that the land is supposedly healing/being repaired? especially the one next to the big canyon, its so empty there it would have the perfect place for sth like a new settlement or a big boss arena but no its more empty than it was before, why?? and then putting yet another repeating annoying quest there in that weirld empty place?? i just dont get it)

letting you farm points by sleeping at a stable or bringing in a horse gives you LESS incentive to actually go around the world bc you can just farm it there

(and if that was done so youd 'discover' the malanya talks to you in your sleep 'secret' ... that is literally told to you, and if its bc you dont want to force players to go around and find every stable to get all those rewards ... why do you have 140 or whatver caves then with the majority of them being the literal same thing over and over ... to make people actually use the sleeping thing there? .. why, who uses that anyway, and farming points by sleeping there .. what the hell does that add? AND THEN the stupid sleep over tickets, probably the most nothign reward ever, dont count?? i dont think i ever used one- it just all doesnt make any sense, everything plays against each other)

the upgrading system for your horse is .. once again, a neat idea horribly executed, you have to go find malanya to upgrade them, and similarly stupidly like the fairies, they only tell you what food you need for what upgrade when you are there .. or when you are sleeping in the special tm bed at a stable, randomly, one food, bc the quantity changes too

which is just so ??????????? let me go and do a quest that rewards you with a lil booklet in which you can look up what an upgrade costs, or let the stables have that, either as a list or in the menu when selecting a horse or something?? (also why the hell is malanya in a different spot anyway, like, it feels like a modder just plopped them over there, their og spot is just empty now - except for yet again a stupid filler quest for .. another big horse and a yaaaaaaaaays crystal shrine quest- ... the spot is even still called spring of the horse god .... its so stupid, just like the fairy shuffling around, like you really couldnt think of a better way to reuse that concept other than to ... move it to a different spot in the same map and map level???? and not change anything in their og spot except idk, put a hole in the map ... for one of them like .. its like they moved them around last minute just to have the semblance of things being 'changed' with no regard what makes a change actually feel like one and what just feels like, pick up thing, click on random spot on map, drop thing- its like that for the fairies and shrines too, its so dumb and .. feels disrepectful to botw and how much thought seemed to have went into these spots that were clearly built about those things)

and like it couldnt get WORSE, they cut off the paths that horses follow automatically with one of those miasma buttholes (sorry its just a hole cut into the map, it doesnt even look like miasma burst through, it just .. cut out) a monster camp (that RESPAWNS, i thought those camps you clear with a quest would stay clear, but that would make sense, so of course it respawns and you can do the frame rate killer quest over and over yippieee) or otherwise like, with a big rock or a broken bridge-

and there is NO WAY to create a new path or fix or move anything in a game ABOUT BUILDING supposedly, like you needed more reasons to never use a horse????? i liked jsut hopping on and letting them follow a path and chill looking at the landscape, you cant do this here, and you cant even excuse it with 'its bc of the theme' as in, stuff is destroyed bc calamity 1.5 or whatever bc nothing in the game makes it feel like theres anything actually at stake, but the real crime is to make it not be fixable. WHY??? link moves entire buildings with ease but cant move one freaking rock that fell into a river?????? you swing around logs like a club but cant fix a bridge so your horse can get over it??????????????????????????????

[reddwarffemme]

Transfemme Rimmer AU - I cant be bothered to write a full fic but I really like this idea :) don’t like don’t read x

Rimmer doesn’t want Lister to go into stasis again so he decides to get him the one thing he thinks Lister wants: A woman.

Rimmer gets Holly to change his appearence to a woman. He find lister and tries to flirt with him but obviously Lister recognises that it’s Rimmer and gets him to change back.

But Lister decides to stay anyways.

Then one night Lister wakes up because he hears Rimmer asking Holly to change his appearce to a woman again. Lister goes back to sleep and in the morning Rimmer is back to his usual self.

Then it happens again where Lister wakes up to a female Rimmer in their room - getting Holly to change his hair, his clothes, his makeup.

After a couple of weeks of this Lister tries to bring it up but Rimmer clams up about it immideietly. The next night does not ask Holly to change his appearence.

So Lister goes to Holly and asks him to change Rimmers appearence again while he sleeps.

Rimmer wakes up feeling better than he has in a while. He gets up and finds Lister and the cat having breakfast in the ships old cafeteria.

Rimmer goes to greet them but is shocked to find his voice high like a womans. Then he realises his body, his hair, his clothes.

His cheeks redden in embarrasment but Lister smiles and says its fine, to sit down, that him and the cat are discussing whether the last episode of Seinfeld was good or not.

So Rimmer sits down. And all is good.

[midnightmah07]

bare with me 😍-

in idia’s vignette, ace 100%, played “20 questions” with her awhile grim was away. And one of his questions were “do you really want to leave twisted wonderland?” Like 😀 girl couldn’t answer she froze but anyway i am going to do a scenario later on

MOVING ON

this song is so bluecherry, like they like each other, but do they LIKE LIKE EACH OTHER???

“And maybe we should stay friends” i think Ace doesn’t want to go out with Winnie bc he thinks that he may screw up and make her sad and making her sad would make him sad and they would part ways 😔 DID YOU GET IT?!?!

Okay onto the next thing:

HIM WAITING FOR HER TO CONFESS BC HE IS KINDA SCARED

bonus points, bc he kissed her to shut her up after their show in VDC (before they lost lol), BUT IT WAS SO IMPULSIVE THAT WHEN THEY NOTICED JAMIL, GRIM, KALIM, DEUCE AND THE OTHERS JUST STARE AT THEM LIKE 😦 and then when Ace was mad bc they lost, she takes his hand and just “^^” WAITING FOR HIM TO CONFESS ANDNTHEN HE FINALLY SAYS IT.

ANOTHER SONG THAT IS SOOOOO THEM CORE

i just imagine ace’s head being this as he finally realizes he likes winnie hehejdgjwhdjsm

they are cute

also small hcs, maybe ooc, but who cares is bluecherry:

Winnie would write small love letters to Ace, before they were dating. But the love was so subliminal that he couldn’t figure so when she asked him if he read her letter he said “yeah, cool poem. you should show malleus.” AND SHE WAS LIKE “:(“

Ace would give her his jackets bc when he gets them back has her smell. Which is fresh fruity scent with caramel notes.

WINNIE ALREADY SLAP ACE, IDK EXACTLY WHEN BUT ITS FUNNY SO SHE DID LOL

she knows how to sing and loves story telling, so ace when ace cant sleep he asks her if he either can come over or she can try to send an audio (she is like an old lady trying to do so)

he doesn’t like pda, surprisingly but he is the type of guy who screams “THATS MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!” Everytime she does something badass 🥹

Ace keeps demanding Whitney could be allowed to join a club instead of cleaning the school with the staff.

HE LEARNED HOW TO BRAID HAIR FOR HER 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

i do think ace ask help for his big brother but he uses “a friend of mine” “you mean you, ace?” “A FRIEND OF MINE😡”

Double date daiggie and bluecherry would be iconic tho, like imagine Whitney and Daisy forgetting they have boyfriends in the middle of the date and start walking alone together awhile talking

@justm3di0cr3 ALSO WE COULD DO A POPEL AND BLUECHERRY DOUBLE DATE

BLUECHERRYYYYYY

*ahem* ok I'm fine I'm normal. ((I'm not

THEY'RE SOOOOOOOO CUTE AND WHOLESOME AND ADORABLE AND ARGH I NEED TO KISS THEIR FOREHEADS. THE HEADCANONS MADE ME GO INSANE. HER SINGING HIM LULLABIES OR TELLING STORIES FOR HIM TO GO TO SLEEP. HER BEING SHY ABOUT PDA. HIM BEING SUPER PROUD OF HER. DAIGGIE + BLUECHERRY DOUBLE DATE WHERE DAISY AND WINNIE FORGOT THEY'RE WITH THEIR BFS BC THEY'RE HAVING SM FUN TALKING.

THEY'RE MY EVERYTHING

[moeblob]

You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)

[weirdmageddon]

how do people even find partners. i dont want a bullshit answer, like really

[anaalnathrakhs]

love this part of my life where the things that are difficult but challenging and good for me are things i can stop and skip and halfass, but the things that are difficult and painful and pointless are the things i have to live with no matter what

[deus-ex-mona]

i miss her…

[boxwinebaddie]

UNCLE NINA WRITES WEIRD JK STAN LETTERS!

hello benevolent angel people!

( because you're wonderful but bc you're doing gods work by supporting my dead fanfic from hell. c:’ )

so this is a lil...experimental? but bc i've been dabbling on that one ask large lore ask that set before kyle knows raven of crimson dawn is his stan, i've gotten very attached to writing the silly jersey letters to dead stan in his journal again. ( again, nina lore is that it's what a friend had me do when my first cat passed away.

i still write to her. <3 )

but this is just something i wrote to get back into the habit of writing again. i put it on docs and i used a font which...okay? tbh, i think looks exactly like i want jk's handwriting to look. like its very swirly, he is my calligraphy king. i didn't proof it bc i just wrote...all of it tonight like a weird crazy person.

also i realize jk sounds...a lot like me

— but he Is me, tbh?

like in some facets i did give him lil pieces of myself so he could grow into an uber tall thicc as hell academic hot jersey talk shit get hit boy.

( i also do think he's a lot goofier with stan in his little letters esp since he doesn't think that anyone is going to read them they are just his lil vent space. let it out king! )

as for the timeline...i think it's pre!rm bonus content? like i dropped a little context about stuff that happened before the fic, but i think it's probably written anywhere in the last 1-2 years of rm before kyle went to that crimson dawn concert. i'm not sure what compelled me to write it i just...really like vulnerable jersey just being a jersey dirtbag but like kneeling by the stan shrine and asking for light.

speaking of...as far as triggers go. mostly the spelling is just bad, help, but jersey does talk a lot about stan dying and is very...distressed about it. he's also...really depressed and is not at the moment coping super well, but is reaching out for help. <3 always reach out for help when you need it. i didn't mention anything specific, but he does just mention thinking he's not a good person, feeling ugly, unworthy, lost, etc...TW FOR HIM BEING SO VULNERABLE AND CUTE ALSO.

he is...my secret loverboy prince.

he is my lo-...

my L-

anyways...ROLL CLIP!

[ra-vio]

semester is almost over. im dying

[carcarrot]

scrolling back through my liveblogging of the day of the nyc concert because of recent notifications and its such a fun mixed bag of emotions to relive it all again

[icouldbeyourprettygirl]

Sometimes I feel so left behind? My friends are in relationships or starting to date, and here I am, in love with a married man old enough to be my father. They're experiencing all kinds of firsts, and I've never even held hands with a guy.

[toastsnaffler]

dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....

[moeblob]

I'm on an OC kick and also super indecisive so I spun a wheel (thank you for choosing for me, RNG).

Ricardo is a body guard and is bffs with Marlo. Ricardo's current job is watching after a celebrity's daughter who the public doesn't know even exists. She's just a teenage girl vibing with her mom and getting texts and calls from her dad (who loves her a whole lot and keeps her out of the spotlight very purposefully) and has this bodyguard and his weird friend. Marlo is just vibing with his best friend.

(Also Marlo would absolutely laugh if he heard Ricardo say "someone called me eye candy and it wasn't you and now I think you should call me that")

[falldogbombsthemoon]

Thihihi I feel so good

[no-light-left-on]

thinking still about how the Heart calls the Whalers 'puppets' and the amount of mystery there is around them, when playing as Corvo and perceiving them through the Heart, in comparison to how they are in reality.

we see them talk to each other in a manner any people would. they consider insubordination, they talk badly of Daud behind his back, we have Billie betray him. there are some that are loyal, yes, be it because they believe in Daud or because they see gain in this path, but by no means are they a monolyth.

however, we do hear from the Heart about a 'fog that surrounds them and hides their secrets' and it is even confirmed, by Billie (and also Galia in the books) that leaving Daud made them 'think clearly for the first time in years'

I've seen a couple theories and I do want to dive into each, to an extent.

there's the suggestion of the Heart talking badly of them, calling them mindless drones that only kill out of hatred and hurt. which, valid. the Heart also says certain things about Daud, 'why did you bring me here? do you expect me to forgive him?', so it's not unlikely that their attitude towards human lives and their willingness to kill for Daud is repulsive enough that the Heart does not see past it

another option is that the mindless puppets is more of a metaphor and is meant to talk about how the Whalers are, in a sense, a cult. which would be incredibly interesting to explore if we had more information on how the Whalers function. now I do want to point out that by cult I do not mean it in a Secluded Religious Organization but as a sociological thing. a literal cult if you will, with a leader that charms their followers, the seclusion and all the unhealthy attitudes of losing oneself to the group. and, that does check out - the loss of individuality, they are as one, following someone's orders without hesitation, someone they would die for. there are a lot of unsavory implications here (if you know how cults work, you probably had some cross your mind already), but arguably Daud is not charming enough to be a proper cult leader. the appeal is the magic, and his excellent skills as an assassin and a leader. maybe it's because of the time we see the Whalers at, right before a collapse, but Daud is regularly doubted and we see a lot of insubordination. the Whalers are not necessarily loyal to him because of who he is as a person. they want the power, they want the influence, maybe the protection, and the things keeping them from disobeying are fear, rather than loyalty.

the third thought or theory is, then, that many of these symptoms can be explained by the influence of the Void. we know the Void affects people, both physically as we see with Delilah's Witches or the Eyeless, as it influences them mentally, if the high numbers of people going mad because of their worship are something to go by. if, then, the Whalers are bound to the Void through Daud, it only makes sense that they would be influenced by this link to something that messes with people's brains. Galia saying she feels better after her Arcane Bond faded could easily mean that the influence the Void had on her has faded, and the creeping madness of it has subsided significantly.

all of these most likely come into play. one of the Heart's lines in dh2, if we point at a Witch, is reciting some of the recipes the Witches chant before quickly apologising. we do learn significantly more about them than we do about the Whalers, of course, possibly because Jessamine has more ill will towards the Whalers than to the Witches. still we see the Void affect the Heart. there is also a notion that the Witches are 'not quite human' due to their Arcane bond.

there's no real conclusion. it's just interesting

[moodr1ng]

another reason i think all drugs should be legal and cheap is i think i could do a better job prescribing my own meds than my psych does ngl. like im p sure one reason ive been feeling so dogshit recently is the psych meds im on that also do literally nothing for me (theyre supposed to be mood regulators. for my depression. i am severely suicidal months on these meds. like..?) but when i misuse my prescription drugs (opioids and benzos) i manage to feel much better and often can actually get enough energy and feel well enough to do stuff ive been putting off. i literally only cook for myself while misusing my prescription drugs. if i could just decide for myself what meds i take and when i would probably be doing much better and at the very least i wouldnt keep taking meds that do NOTHING but make me feel like trash.