#anyway i have no clue where this idea came from but it's funny so i don't care

[smile-files]

this program was brought to you by blocky's funny doings international

(objectober day 30: prank)

[nichoswag]

Hey Rei! I've been thinking for a while if I should send a prompt request or not, but here we go. 😂 (Hope you'll like it lol)

So my idea is #15 "Please stop flirting with me, my parents are right there." with a fake dating trope. And the idol who first came to my mind was Heeseung, I feel like he would match this well! You're free to decide the atmosphere of the story, I, personally was just feeling funny haha. I hope you'll have fun with this request! <33

flirt . lee heeseung

prompt: "please stop flirting with me, my parents are right there."

pairing: fake bf!heeseung x gn reader

warnings: fake dating au, lots of flirting, kissing, teasing, like one light innuendo

song rec: into it - chase atlantic (warning: song is extremely sexual)

a/n: hii marine! admittedly i did push this to the top of my list because i feel a bit more inclined to complete reqs from my moots ♡ sorry it took so long, but i did have a lot of fun with this request!! i hope you enjoy :))

if someone were to ask you how you got in this situation, you honesly couldn't say you have a clue.

walking into your childhood friend's parents' house hand-in-hand with him, you're still questioning how you got here.

well, to put it simply, you and heeseung grew up together. you even went to college together, and now you're back home together. but, you're now actually together.

at least, that's what you've told both of your parents, after constant nagging and pleading from both ends for you both to date someone. so, your solution was to pretend you're both dating each other.

now, you're shaking due to the nerve of the roles you're both about to play.

heeseung squeezes your shaking hand that's placed in his, sending you a reassuring smile. "hey, it's fine. we're only doing this to get them off our backs."

your heart flutters at his smile and the kind action.

mrs lee opens the door for the both of you. "____! it's so nice to see you," she exclaims, pulling you into a hug.

"moooom," heeseung whines. "what about me?"

she chuckles. "oh, hush. i haven't seen ____ in years."

as she welcomes the two of you into her house, you realize how natural this feels after all. besides, you and mrs lee have always been close, as your moms are best friends, so she's like a second mom to you anyway.

heeseung leads you through the wide hall into the large dining room. sending you a wink, he pulls back your chair for you. you send him a weird look as you sit down, but he ignores it and pushes your chair in, taking a seat next to you.

diagonal from where you and heeseung sit, your fathers are arguing about who's lawnmower does the better job. you chuckle at their pettiness as your mother chastises your dad for picking a fight over such a stupid thing. things haven't changed at all.

you're immersed in a conversation with heeseung until someone takes a seat across from you. it's heedo, your fake boyfriend's older brother.

and your childhood crush.

there's a girl sitting next to him, and they're holding hands, just as you and heeseung were a few minutes ago.

heeseung seems to notice your curiosity, because he leans closer to speak into your ear. "that's yeri, heedo's girlfriend." he takes your hand again and squeezes it. "are you okay? we can leave if you're uncomfortable," he offers, knowing about your long-term crush on his brother.

you shake your head. "i'm alright. just surprised."

he nods, understanding. "are you over him? i mean, you've dated since you last saw him."

"i think so, actually." you smile, nostalgia hitting you suddenly. "he was my childhood crush, so i guess it's just weird for me. it's not like i haven't seen him with a girl before."

you remember the time you saw him making out with a girl at a party him and heeseung had thrown in high school while yours and their parents were on a trip. you'd then gotten drunk on wine to the point of throwing up, and heeseung had held your hair back half the night at your house while you threw up.

then, when he brought his first girlfriend for dinner with his parents. heeseung had invited you over, not knowing he was there with his girlfriend, and you'd spent the evening crying in his room while he held you.

heeseung grins at you, seemingly remembering those nights too. you feel eternally grateful to have someone like him in your life.

he presses a kiss to your temple, seemingly trying to keep up the act. "you hungry, cutie?"

you nod shyly, blushing as he ruffles your hair. "starved."

within a few moments, heedo and heeseung get up to help their mother bring plates of food from the kitchen and set them in the middle of the large dining table.

yeri stares at you across the table. you feel self-conscious as she eyes you up and down, as if she's analyzing how big of a threat you are to her.

heeseung catches a glance at her eyeing you as he sits down, sighing as he realizes what's going on. he glares back at her, and she just smiles innocently, fixing a napkin on her lap. she glares at you as she kisses heedo on the cheek.

"what's her problem?" heeseung whispers in your ear.

you shrug. "i have no clue. I've literally just been sitting here."

he rolls his eyes. "i hope she doesn't cause a scene."

dinner does end up going without a hitch. besides a few more glares from yeri when heedo asks about your experiences in university and settling into your new job, you feel at ease. even when yours and heeseung's parents ask how you two began dating, you're able to answer the questions just as the two of you practiced earlier.

you notice heeseung looking at you with an expression you don't recognize throughout dinner. almost like admiration, except his eyes are fiery. you just think he's playing the role of your loving boyfriend.

mrs lee brings out a tray of sweets. "anyone hungry for dessert?" she practically sings.

heeseung grins and leans close. "mine's already here." he places a hand on your knee.

you choke on your own spit, and he pats your back. "please stop flirting with me, my parents are right there," you whisper-yell into his ear as everyone stares at you both.

your hear giggles, and you realize everyone must have heard what you said.

your mother smiles sweetly at the both of you. "don't worry, we're not judging you. the two of you are adorable."

you blush furiously, and heeseung ruffles your hair again.

yeri huffs from across the table, and you realize she must be jealous of the attention you two are receiving as a couple, not insecure of her relationship. she busies herself with fixing heedo's collar aggressively.

he grabs her hands as the attention turns to them. "what is your problem? you've been like this all evening. can't you just act normal?"

heeseung stifles a laugh from beside you and you nudge him with your elbow. "what's funny?"

he leans over to whisper in your ear for the third time tonight. "just that they're seemingly an actual couple and they get along worse than us."

you giggle, and yeri turns to glare furiously at you. "what the fuck is funny, you callous bitch?"

there are gasps all along the table, and heeseung nearly stands up defensively before you grab his arm to pull him down.

"don't think i haven't noticed you flaunting you perfect boyfriend all night." she laughs mockingly. "you're like a three. how did you manage to pull that guy?"

"get out." heedo glares at his probably soon-to-be-ex girlfriend, motioning towards the hall that leads to the front door.

"what?" her tough front cracks as she wears a scared face. "heedo-"

"i said. get. out." he gets up, pulling her up with him and marching toward the hallway.

you can hear the yelling and screaming still. "i've told you before, she's like a fucking SISTER to me! who are you to talk to my family like that?" "SHE WAS TAUNTING ME WITH HER PERFECT GUY-"

eventually, the screaming is muffled as it seemingly continues outside.

mrs lee gains her composure and proceeds with setting out the dessert. "kids these days are so dramatic. minus my ____, of course. you're an angel."

you smile at her. "thanks, mrs lee."

her smile falters. "honey, why don't you just call me 'mom?' i'll be your mother-in-law eventually, anyway."

you nearly choke again, and heeseung stifles a laugh. "just go with it," he mouths.

you smile again. "sure, mom. thank you for the dessert."

dinner wraps up rather quickly after the dramatic scene. heedo returns at the very end, looking very disheveled as you and heeseung make your way up the long spirals stairs to his room, where you'll both be staying the night.

heeseung lets out a long laugh after he closes the door to his childhood bedroom, nearly slumping against it. "that was a train wreck. heedo has terrible taste in girls."

you giggle. "he should've just chosen me when he had the chance."

heeseung's smile fades. "no, i rather like having you to myself."

your feel a twinge of pain in your heart at the way his smile drops. "hee, i was just kidding. i told you, i'm over him. i think i like someone else now, anyway."

the smile that began to creep onto his face at the first part of your speech drops again as he hears the last part. "oh." his shoulders slump, face looking dejected.

you catch his face in your hands as he turns away from you. "hee, do you really not realize who i'm talking about?"

his eyes widen in realization. "you mean..."

"yes, i mean i like you, lee heeseung." you grin at him.

before you realize it, he's taking you into his arms and picking you off the ground and you're spinning through the air. you both giggle as you come back onto the ground.

now flustered, you look away from him "so..."

"i like you too, ____. i thought that was pretty obvious." he ruffles your hair yet again, pulling you close by your waist.

you giggle. "it kinda was."

he looks at you for a moment, gentle gaze flickering between your eyes and lips. "can i kiss you?"

you nod, and he leans down to connect your lips gently. you wrap your arms around his neck, one hand resting on the nape of his neck, and the other tangling in his hair.

he pulls away and you lean your head against his chest, breathless.

"fuck, i think i might be in love with you." the words leave your mouth before you can even think about what you're saying.

he smirks down at you as you meet his eyes, yours wide. "yeah? what makes you think that?"

you inhale sharply. "you've been there for me through everything since we were kids. my heart hurts when you're sad, i feel angry when you're angry, and i'm happy when you are. also, i always find myself missing you when you're not around. i think that's love."

he smiles, eyes shining brightly. "if that's the case, i love you too."

minutes later, you're settled in a pair of heeseung's clothes, waiting on his bed for him to come back from the bathroom.

as he enters the room, your heart races. you've spent nights together as friends, no biggie. but now, it's the real deal.

he sprawls out on the bed beside you and turns to look at you. "cuddle?" he asks, opening his arms. you practically dive into them as they wrap around your body tightly.

you realize you feel safe here. that to you, there's never been any place safer than in his arms.

©nichoswag | do not copy my work or repost onto any other platform.

[ryoalouette]

Machi's #12 DPxDC Idea

Dick shivered, Klarion had him against the wall and the sword. Quite literally. He had tie him up to a wall and now was threatening him with a sword.

"Relax," Klarion said. "I only want to talk."

"Funny way to show it," Dick quipped back.

"Oh? You mean this?" Klarion said swinging the sword. "Don't pay attention to it, is just a little failsafe in case things don't work as planned."

Dick narrowed his eyes, he was sure Klarion wasn't afraid of him or Batman so, what kind of creature could make him afraid? Dick needed to know more.

"What did you want to talk about anyway?"

Klarion swifter his feet, as if pondering what to say.

"Don't you ever get tired?" Klarion asked Dick surprising him.

"I mean, always in the same place, fighting the same fights, a never ending circle. It's so boring, so predictable. Wouldn't you like to fly away? To be able to see new places and meet new people?"

Dick thought about it, it was true that he was tired of being tied up to the same place. Back in his childhood he used to be constantly traveling, constantly moving. That ended when his parents died, Bruce had tried to help the itch by taking him on several expensive trips but it was not the same. He wanted to walk away without knowing where he would end up, enjoying the way more than the destiny itself. But he was fine, he was doing good, he was making the world a better place. His own comfort was secondary.

Klarion smiled, "that's what I thought."

Dick frowned, what were Klarion's intentions? But he didn't have time to ask. Klarion slapped something in his forefront as a portal opened.

"Klarion!" Yelled a feminine voice. "Time to pay up bitch!"

Klarion squawked and held his sword harder.

"He yearns for freedom! Take him!" He yelled as he pointed at Dick and took a step back. Dick gasped, so this was his plan! Not very original but very problematic for him.

Out of the portal came an old wrecked ship and from it fell a woman. She wore a mismatch of clothes from different time periods, several piercings on her pointed ears and a scarf tied up in her head. She also had long white hair and bright green eyes. Dick shivered as she smiled a too sharp smile.

"Not bad," she said getting closer to Dick. She turned to Klarion, "the payment is acceptable." Klarion let out a sigh of relief as she grabbed Dick's arm and pulled him up with her.

"Welcome abroad bitch, get ready to explore the realms and see what nobody has seen before. What nobody is supposed to see." Dick gulped as the boat traveled away through another portal

-

Bruce was desperate, it had been months since Dick had disappeared and they weren't any closer to find him than they were on day one. They had looked under every stone, every brick in the world and nothing. They had asked for favors from every person they knew, spent all the resources available to the justice league and even called for the green lanterns help. Nothing. Until Jason found a new book titled "kidnapped by the pirate queen" a romantic book about a rich boy that yearned for freedom and it was kidnapped by the pirate queen to travel the world and fell in love in the process. Coincidentally enough, it was written by one R.G.W. The batfam was divided if the clues were there or if it was a coincidence. Until the second book of the series came out, and then the third. With each new book it was more obvious that it was Dick writing the books, now only one question was, when they were going to meet their new sister in law?

[quibbs126]

So we have part 2 of stylized Cookies, pretty much all from today other than bird girls

I feel like I did better yesterday, but also I haven’t seen yesterday’s drawing since yesterday, so I don’t really remember if it was

I was planning on drawing the Hollyberry family, but because I got stuck on Jungleberry (I deleted her so you can’t see), that didn’t end up happening. Funny enough, I was also like “I have no clue what to do for White Lily and Pure Vanilla so they’re probably not gonna be drawn for a while”, but what got me to draw more today was ideas for White Lily, and Pure Vanilla came along later

To be honest, White Lily and Pure Vanilla probably still need some tweaking before I color them. I’m still not really sure what I’m doing with White Lily’s hair, and for Pure Vanilla I feel like I haven’t done enough outside of the eyes and the hat. Maybe it’s because I gave him an oval head? I wasn’t really sure what head shape to give him other than it not being one I already used

Speaking of their eyes, White Lily’s are supposed to be pink with white irises, and Pure Vanilla is supposed to have no irises, but solid yellow and blue. Which when I was drawing looked somewhat unsettling, which is funny because since I draw so many Cookies, that’s usually normal now

Also also, I now want to make a purelily kid that combines their features, aka White Lily’s half shadow face and Pure Vanilla’s small non iris eyes. They’d look like the comedy mask. And probably also somewhat like Shadow Milk

As for the Hollyberry family, I think Holly herself looks good, and the other two look alright. Princess probably needs more tweaking. I wanted to give them a running trait of not just dot eyes, but leaves in their hair. I’m thinking that every Hollyberrian has leaves in their hair, since they’re berries. I am struggling with Royal Berry and Princess’, since the best place to it their leaves is where they have something else, aka their crown and heart pins

To be honest I want to make it so that Princess is half berry half candy, so that maybe she could not have to have the leaves, but I like Jungleberry and don’t want to get rid of her or turn her into a candy, so oh well

I drew Red Velvet because I was struggling with White Lily and Pure Vanilla. I gave him a triangle head because someone somewhere on my first page said something about Golden Cheese having a triangle face because the Cakes, so why not give the half cake Cookie a triangle head as well?

Also with Red Velvet I definitely took liberties in redesigning him, like with the hair and horns, but I don’t think he looks necessarily bad? As least not by the end

I also drew him with Dark Choco because darkvelvet is a thing I know. Though to be honest, while I draw it, I’m not sure how much I like it. Like in theory I like it, it’s not bad, it’s just that I don’t think I get it. Like as far as I can tell they can only be doomed by the narrative because Dark Choco leaves, but maybe I’m interpreting Red Velvet’s character wrong. It’s been over a year since I watched his story. And also I’m not sure what draws people to the ship? Like darklico for example I can get for various reasons, but I don’t know about darkvelvet

Oh yeah, Licorice is here too. Forgot about that. Well I tried to make his head oval shaped because it’s sort supposed to look like a skull? Or a cartoony skull. Same with his eyes and mouth, they’re supposed to be somewhat skull-y. I didn’t draw his actual skulls though because I’m lazy and it’s a small drawing. I think he turned out pretty good though

I think maybe next page I should focus on more random characters outside of the Ancients. Maybe that’ll help the creative freedom

Anyways yeah, I think that’s it for now

[matrixbearer2024]

(I'm not new to Tumblr but I'm just stupid and did absolutely nothing so I have no idea where to ask questions so I'm just going to do it here that's okay also if you could let me know where I ask questions that would be amazing 😭)

*for the actor AU* I just want to know who's bright idea was it to make the readers damnation a chocolate bar they stole when they were five

Actor AU: Lore Drop 2

(Y/N): "Huh? Oh that-? Wait, wasn't it your bright idea Adam?"

Adam: "No? Unless you count the jokes that it came from my contribution."

(Y/N): "I mean, probably?"

Adam: "For all you fans out there, context was I made some jokes poking fun at heaven's hypocrisy given how my character is and acts-"

Lute: "Your character's insanely scummy and cringe, I'll die on that hill."

Adam: "I think the word you're looking for is charming and funny Lute, but yeah he is a jerk. Some fans still think he's hot though, so thank you! Anyway-! I was making jokes and all that with I think Husker and Em when Alastor decided to join in on the conversation."

(Y/N): "Ohhh, doesn't he help with the script writing?"

Adam: "He does. I should've known the old man was up to something when he made a jab about heaven's funky fine print being canon."

Lute: "He's not that much older than you."

Adam: "He acts like it and practically everyone jokingly calls him grandpa on set anyway."

(Y/N): "Huh, so your inspiration and his execution. How the fuck did that end up becoming my character damned by a candy bar?!"

Adam: "Your guess is honestly as good as mine. Cuz bitch I've got no fuckin clue."

Lute: *Facepalms*

[watsittoyah]

Along Came A Spider…2099

Warnings-Sexual content, and adult content. Some mentions of multiple dimensions. Oral sex, rough sex, fang play, claws kink, size kink, breeding kink, some over stimulation, major begging (female) and web bondage (shibari?)

(My Spanish isn’t great, so I did use google translate and spanishdict to help…)

Chapter 9- And the puzzles fall into place..

Miguel has been very tense lately, which was making you tense. You figured he was feeling tense due to the green goblin incident.

Your only clue was when you asked him about it, he had simply snapped his pen in half, causing ink to spill on his paperwork.

So you were planning a little day trip with Miguel to help him relax. It was set in motion for Saturday morning, but as of right now you were going to cook him a meal and help him unwind.

You were at his apartment door, with Tupperware of food. When he answered, he looked like he hadn’t slept. “Amor, what are you doing here?” He ushers you inside and you kiss him on his stubbled cheek.

“I am here to feed you. You’ve been coming in late and don’t think I don’t notice. I’ve been keeping tabs on Spider-Man. You had prevented a helicopter from crashing last night.”

At the mention of that he looked pissed. “Whoa, did I say something wrong?” He shakes his head as he takes the food from you and places it in his kitchen. “No, soy sólo…promise not to get upset?”

“All depends, Miguel. What am I not getting upset about?” He sighs and he rubs his eyes. “The Green Goblin showed up last night. They had baited me, which now thinking about it I should’ve known better. And I’m lucky no one got killed. Si hubiera sabido que era una trampa, no habría seguido a ese hijo de puta.”

“Miguel, baby. I know Spanish but please english.” You tell him as you see he is really riled up. He closes his eyes and nods. “Sorry, amor. So anyways the helicopter, it was holding someone important inside or so I thought. When I had finally stopped it from falling out of the sky, I had opened the doors expecting to see the person but no, it was a note and a fucking pumpkin. Esa maldita calabaza estúpida!”

He smacks the counter making you jump because with his claws he left huge scratch marks. “W…what was on the note?” You ask him. He gives a dark chuckle. “It said, next time I won’t leave just a trick. I’ll give you a treat. I had to grab the pumpkin and throw it into the Britannia river. It was only a bomb, no toxins this time but still. How could I be so stupid!”

You walk over to him and rub his back to soothe him. “You didn’t know, but you will for next time. Alright let’s talk, what do you know about this Green Goblin? Maybe talking about it will help you calm down some and we can bounce ideas off of each other.” He nods as he leans against his counter.

“So far, all I know is that this beast has a flare for blowing things up, and they are into Halloween a little too much for me.”

“Well in my perspective, I remember them gliding on something…they could be into tech? Maybe they have a large amount of money or stole the money. They have some knowledge in toxins. And they have a flare dramatics.”

“The thing that’s bothering me the most of about this green goblin is how do they know where to strike. They always seem to attack when I’m in the area.”

“Wouldn’t that be funny if you had a secret admirer?” You joke. Miguel doesn’t even crack a smile. “Yeesh touchy crowd. How about you make some notes on this big bad, and when you’re done let’s eat. I made curry chicken, with fluffy white rice and if you’re not full, I made some sweet potato pie.”

Miguel rubs his stomach. “I’ll make the notes later. Right now let’s eat I am starving.” You pat his stomach and smile. “Alright, now when you eat make sure you don’t pass out.”

After you two were done eating, you were enjoying each others company on the couch while watching a movie. “Baby?”

“Yes, princesa?” He look over at you and you sit up. “Can I steal a bit of your morning tomorrow?” You ask as you pull the blankets over the two of you. “Of course, pero porque mi amor?”

“Well, it’s more of a gift from me to you. I know your jobs both as a scientist and hero can be stressful, so I have a secret activity for us to do. It might not be fancy but it’s calming and you can let Spider-Man get a break. How does that sound?”

“Eso suena como el cielo.” Miguel says as he pulls you onto his lap.

You nuzzle up close to him and you give a nod. “Well you better be up and at it tomorrow morning. I want to get on the road with as little traffic as possible. Do you mind if I sleep here tonight? Erica and Denis are having a date night at the apartment.”

“No need to ask, you know I love it when you sleep over. How about we get to bed? I don’t know about you but I don’t want a crook in my neck.” As you two get ready for bed, you and Miguel were in the bathroom brushing your teeth while he was washing his face. You look over at Miguel’s bare torso and frown a little.

He has so many scars and bruises you can’t help but close the distance between you two and kiss the one on his shoulder. “Just a scratch, amor. I’ll heal.” He says with a sleepy grin. “That’s not the point, Miguel. All of these scars, no wonder you’re tired. You’re practically carrying Nueva York on your back.”

“I’d carry heaven and hell on my back if it meant to keep you safe, Tommie.” He places his hand on your cheek and he kisses your forehead. You sigh because you know once he gets this way there’s no talking him out of it. “Alright princesa, it is time for bed.” He scoops you up and leads you to the bedroom.

He places you in bed and you turn off his lamp on his nightstand. Soon after he crawls into bed next to you and pulls you in close. “Have I told you how much I am in love with you, Tommie Valentine?”

“Oh this must be serious, you’re using my first and last name.” You tease as you rub your hand against another one of his bruises. “I am serious, amor. You know sometimes I think about the future. I think about us married and happy. And sometimes…I think about not being Spider-Man.”

You look at his pretty hazel eyes in the dim moonlight and rub your thumbs against his cheeks. “Whether you’re Spider-Man or just Miguel O’Hara the scientist, I would still be proud and love you…and I’d marry you.”

A huge grin breaks out across Miguel’s face. “You’d marry me?” You nod thinking why would that even be a question? “Of course, you know sometimes if I’m just sitting there, I can picture this pretty red diamond wedding ring on my finger.” Miguel was quiet for a while and you notice he was just staring at your hand.

“Mi corazón en forma humana.” He whispers. “What does that mean again?” You ask him. “I’ll tell you some other time. Now let’s get to sleep, Spider-Man is getting a day off tomorrow.” You don’t argue. Instead you lay down and close your eyes, dreaming about a wedding that you swear you’ve seen before.

•••

“Amor, where are we-watch out for that ardilla!” You swerve avoiding the squirrel and you roll your eyes. “Miguel, you act as if I can’t drive. I am an excellent driver.”

“Dile eso a los animales.” He mutters. “Hey! I heard that!” You make a turn and Miguel does a praying motion with his hands. “Where are we going? I’m asking for the sake of the animals.” Miguel asks as you drive up to an empty parking lot.

“The animals will be fine, and we are here. Come on, help me get the cooler and the poles please.” You get out of the car and Miguel grabs the cooler while you make sure the fishing poles are secured.

“I didn’t take you as the fishing type, amor.” You shrug. “I fished a lot with my mom. She said she would get her best ideas out on the water. Now the spot she’d take me is in CT, and since we aren’t there, I figured this spot would be second best.”

You walk down to the water and place the fishing poles down. “I’ll go grab the chairs.” You offer. “No need, I’ll grab them.” Miguel webs his way back to the car and when he gets back you had your hands on your hips. “Què?” He asks as he lands. “It’s Spider-Man’s day off remember? So that means no web slinging.”

Miguel looks at you and shrugs. “Forgive me, I will behave.” He sets the chairs up for you and you straighten out your jeans as you place the bait on the hooks. You hand Miguel a pole as you get yours and you cast out your line.

When you sit down you inhale the cool air and sigh. “When I was…six. I had went on this fishing trip with my parents. I was scared because my mom said when she was little she would catch fish as big as a dog. For some reason in my head I thought those fish were going to eat me. Funny I know. But I had the best time. I even caught three fish that day.” You say looking over at Miguel.

He looked like he was thinking. “The one time I went fishing it was with my sperm-father, and my little brother. That was the only day I can say I had fun with my father. We had caught this trout that was twice the size as me and Gabriel. My father had told me that if there is one thing an O’Hara can do, it’s provide for their family. Funny how he taught us that and he was still un pedazo de mierda.”

“Alright let’s not think about the past, let’s focus on catching some fi-” Miguel’s line flicks and he reels in whatever he just caught. “Alright!” He cheers as he feels in a bass. “That’s good baby, you caught something great.” You say feeling a bit jealous, because you wanted to catch something.

“I’m going to let it go. It’s a mother, I can tell from the egg sack.” Miguel gently takes the fish off of the hook and puts it back in the water.

“I can’t wait to see what you catch, amor. I bet it’ll be huge.” Miguel says with encouragement. “Yeah, huge.” You reply as you sit forward hoping for a bite. Miguel flicks out his line again and several minutes later he gets another bite.

You side eye him as he gets excited. “Come on fishes, what’s a girl to do to get a bite? At least a little nibble?” You mutter to yourself. “Amor do you need any help?”

“No, I got it. I got this. It’s just fish, fish that I haven’t caught yet.” You mutter as you wait for a bite. “I can help you, you know.” You cut your eyes at him and he looks away. “O tal vez no.”

You get a tug on your line and you reel it in. “Come to mama. Come on baby, come on.” You get the fish out of the water and your smile immediately vanishes. On your hook was the smallest fish you ever did see. “Miguel O’Hara if you laugh don’t expect me to come over your place for a week.” You say taking the tiny fish off of your hook and tossing them back. “I wasn’t going to say anything, amor.”

“But? I know you want to say but.” You ask as you get cast your line out. “But maybe I can help you out? I don’t want you to be angry. This is suppose to be relaxing.”

“I got it, just let me get a hang of this…anyways speaking of things I can’t stand, remember when I went to Trenton with Mr Stark? Well we had made a stop for his meeting with Mr D’Angelo and tell me why Dana pops up there? I don’t know about you but the girl seems obsessed.” You look over at Miguel and his jaw was clenched. “What did she say to you?”

“She was being fake, talking about how she had too many drinks, so that’s why she acted the way she did. She even apologized but I’m still calling that bullshit. Oh! She had the nerve to invite us to some event dinner for next month. But I told her that we would be unavailable.”

“You know she’s going to do everything in her power to make sure we attend, right?” You shrug. “Baby, the ancestors could say accept the invitation, we are not going.”

“Be on the look out, Dana will use her resources to make it impossible to miss this event. I wonder why she wants us there.”

“I don’t know, but the thought of her being in the same room as you makes me want to vomit. Still can’t believe you dated that snake even if it was one date.”

“Amor, please don’t remind me.” Miguel groans as you feel a large tug. “Whoa! This is a big one I can feel it.” You try to reel in the fish, but it feels like it’s going to snap the pole.

“Oh no, come on…please don’t b-” And just like that your pole snaps. You just stare in silence and when Miguel makes an attempt to speak you raise a hand. “Don’t…just please don’t.” You take the last piece of your pole and just sit in your chair.

“Am-” You raise a hand to tell him not to speak and you just dig into the cooler and grab out a peanut butter sandwich.

Miguel stabs his pole into the dirt and he stands up. He crouches down behind you and lets his chin rest on your shoulder. “Miss Valentine, are you upset?” You take a hard bite out of your sandwich. “Nope, I’m relaxing.”

“Doesn’t look that way.” You huff, eating your sandwich and he stands up and he walks so he’s standing in front of you. “Ven a sentarte conmigo.” He says as he gently pulls you up. You pout but you follow him back to his chair.

“Miguel this chair has a weight limit. It won’t hold the both of us.” You point out as he pulls you onto his lap. “Nonsense, mi amor. We will be fine. Now look out onto the calm waters and tell me what you see.”

“Water, more water and that punk ass fish that broke my fishing pole.” You tell him. He laughs at your answer and wraps his arms around you. “Well I see, calm waters. A beautiful sky, and an amazing woman with a pout on her face.”

“But the fish broke my pole.” You whine to him. “I know baby girl. And I’ll buy you another one. But for now, let’s just enjoy this moment alone. We have no interruptions, no bosses calling, it’s just you…and me.” Miguel says as he places his hands on your thighs.

“Miguel, I know I didn’t pack three poles, so what is that?” You say as you feel his dick press against your ass. “Oh I think you know what that is. And if it was a pole, then I just got a lucky catch.” He says as he kisses the side of your neck.

You position yourself on his lap so that you can feel his reaction through your jeans and you slowly start to hump him. “Niña traviesa, you just don’t care if someone catches us like this do you?” He reaches under your shirt and he pinches your nipples.

“T…then I’ll be careful.” You moan out. Miguel chuckles against your neck and he coos you as you moan a bit louder. “That’s it, make yourself feel good. Show me how you want to come.” You stop for a second and you undo your pants.

“What are you doing, amor?” He asks as you turn and pull his pants down a bit to release his hardening dick. “I’m showing you how I want to come.” You face the water as you position yourself above him and he gets a hold of your hips. “Guide it in, mi corazón.” Miguel says as you rub your clit against the head of his dick.

You ease down and once he’s inside you still. “This is good, Tommie. If…if someone comes up, it’ll look like we’re just looking at the water, instead of just fucking each other in this chair.” Miguel starts moving his hips up and you lean forward getting balance on his knees.

You really start to get into it but you two hear a car in the distance. Miguel grabs you up and he webs the two of you into a tree top. He balances you against him and a tree.

“Seems like we’re going to have some company soon. But that shouldn’t stop us from having fun, cierto mi amor?” Miguel has you balanced on a thick tree branch and you feel him grind inside of you. “M…Miguel, I s…said no Spider-man powers.” You moan out as you feel the excitement of someone possibly catching you two up in the trees.

“Oh, chingados…mi amor. Why did you clench like that? Don’t tell me you’re turned on at the thought of someone catching us? Mmm, I bet you’re imagining it now. Someone just happening to look up and see your guts being rearranged.” Miguel grips your ass as he thrusts in slow and deep, causing you to grip the tree.

“Please don’t stop. Please keep going.” Miguel slaps your ass and leans in so he’s deeper. “Say it in Spanish, mami.” Miguel says as he grips the back of your shirt. “Por favor no te detengas, Miguel.” You moan out as you look back at him.

He grabs a hold of your chin and he kisses you deeply. “La buena niña, now throw it back for daddy. Show me that you know how to fuck me back.”

You grip the tree trunk and just as he asks you throw it back on him, causing him to bite his shirt and slap your ass. He grunts and you look forward seeing two men setting up their stuff on the other side of the lake.

Miguel yanks your hair back causing a yelping moan. “Don’t even think about it. I’m not sharing, and they can’t fucking watch. You’re all mine, Tommie. All fucking mine.” He starts pounding into you quickly and you moan out that you don’t know what he’s talking about with a smirk on your face.

“Parezco estúpida? I bet you’d love for them look up right now and watch you getting fucked. They’d probably want to join but that will never happen, do you hear me?” Miguel slides out of you and he turns you around so you’re looking at him only.

He grips your throat and you feel his claws slightly dig in. You smile at him and that makes his roughly slide into you. “You love smiling? You just love fucking smiling. Te daré algo por lo que sonreír.” He lets your throat go and he takes your wrists and pins them above your head.

With his webbing he makes your wrists stay in place and he pins your legs apart, also webbing them in place. Miguel pounds deeply into you and you let out loud groan but he places a hand over your mouth. “Not fucking smiling now, are we, amor? Fuck your little cunt feels so good and tight. I might have to just breed you while we’re up here. Is that what you want, princesa? Do you want to have my babies?” He moves his hand from your mouth so you can answer him.

“Yes baby, I d…do. I want your babies, I want to have your babies.” He covers your mouth again and he pounds into you, making you feel sex drunk. “That’s too bad, when you’re my good girl, I’ll give you my babies. But for now you only get this dick deep in this little pussy. I bet it tastes good, don’t you want a taste?” You nod as your eyes roll back.

Miguel slides out of you and he balances so he’s on his knees. He spreads your pussy lips wide and he flicks his tongue fast against your clit. You jerk from his movement and you want to fuck his face, but he has you webbed down to the tree.

He shakes his head fast as he slides two fingers inside of you and you start seeing stars as you squirt. He sucks your lips and clit all together causing you to squirm and jerk. “Baby, baby…” You beg as you pull at the webbing.

He looks up at you and his ruby red eyes seem glisten with happiness. “What’s the matter, Tommie? Is this too much for you? I thought you wanted a taste?” Miguel stands up towering over you and he brings his slick wet fingers to your lips. You open your mouth and suck his fingers, moaning.

“Look at that, such an obedient lover you are. Sucking daddy’s fingers dry. But don’t worry, I’ll get something else soaked.” Before you could think, Miguel was back inside of you pounding without mercy. Your head lolls back against the tree and you feel yourself about to come again.

“No te rindas ahora, princesa. I know you can take this dick, just like those other times.” He grips the tree getting deep as he thrusts. He puts his thumb against your swollen clit and you shake as you come once more.

Miguel growls as he come deep inside of you. He kisses you on your lips and where his claws had gripped. “I’m sorry, amor. You just know how to bring the beast out of me.” Miguel uses his claws to cut you out of the webbing and you manage to pull your pants back up as you sag against him.

“I got you, Tommie.” He says as he holds you up. You both see the two men starting to pack up and leave, which was a good thing because Miguel lands with you in his arms and he sets you down.

You sit down in your chair as you catch your breathe and Miguel takes his line out of the water. “I don’t know about you but, that helped me relax.” Miguel comments. You look at him and shake your head chuckling. “You are a mess.”

“No amor, I made the mess inside of you.” That comment caused the both of you to burst out laughing. “Alright, well now that we made a mess, let’s get back to these fish. I’m going to get a big one. Just watch.” You tell Miguel as you get his pole. He simply walks over and he help you out. “How about we catch some together?” You nod at that and for the rest of the morning you and Miguel relaxed as the fish kept biting on the hook.

••••

If there was one thing you knew about your work life, you knew that Mr Stark loved to make a good impression.

When he peeked into your office, you were reading over some emails and making sure Mr Stark wasn’t double booked. “Miss Valentine?” He asks as he knocks on your door frame.

“Yes Mr Stark sir?” You look away from the computer screen for a moment. “It has come to my attention that the D’Angelo family will be hosting a dinner at Le Rose next month.”

“Yes, I heard about that. I hope you and Mrs Stark have a great time there.” You say as you type a few words down. “We will and I have been told that Mr D’Angelo’s daughter had invited you as well.” Your fingers freeze over the keys. “Yes but I won’t be able to attend. I’m sure with the paper work and it’s getting close to being our busiest part of the season.”

“Nonsense, I’m sure you can come to the dinner. This is a perfect opportunity to show the other guests that this company has what it takes for social events. I will see you there.” He says smiling as he leaves your office.

You grind your teeth so hard it’s a shock they didn’t turn into dust. You dial Miguel immediately and he answers on the third ring. “Hola amor, give me a second I’m just checking on these incubated eggs.” He puts you on hold for a second and when he gets back on the phone you let him know what’s wrong.

“So Mr Stark basically is saying I have to go to that dinner next month all because he wants to look good in front of people. Well he is going to be disappointed when I round house that girl across her head.”

“Amor, amor. Cálmate.” You look at your phone. “I am calm, Miguel, I am just venting.” You tell him as you take out some fruit snacks from your desk. “I know. I just don’t want you to burst out of your office and curse your boss out. Eso no seria buena.”

“No it’s not. I…I really don’t want to go. I feel like she’s going to make me look bad in front of you, or try to flirt with you.” You open the fruit snacks and chew on a few. “That won’t happen. If anything I’ll just put her in her place. Simple como eso, amor.”

You tsk and shake your head. “I would say that’s a good idea, but I feel like she would somehow make things worse.” You hear Miguel talking to someone in the background so you wait for him to answer. “…Well, if we’re going then, we are going to make it a night to remember.” You felt happy with his comment. “Miguel, I honestly don’t deserve you. If you were here I’d give you the biggest kiss.”

“Amor, don’t tell me that. I get to go on my lunch break in five minutes and I will web sling all the way to you just to get a kiss.” You look at watch and smirk. “Well I just so happen to be going on my break in a few, so if you’re planning on dropping by, then I wouldn’t be oppose to you web slinging by and taking me away for lunch. Maybe you’d get more than a kiss.”

“Qué obtendría?” He asks. “Oh I can’t let my secret out of the bag just yet, but just know that it’ll be worth your time, and I’d be thrilled to my knees to see you.” You tell him in a seductive tone. “I’ll be there in ten minutes.” He hangs up and you laugh at his abruptness.

You get your things in order and you decide to time him on if he really will be web slinging to you in ten minutes.

Then again, you wanted lunch with Miguel, not Spider-man today. Plus, the office was getting more and more people stopping by these days. You call Miguel but his phone goes to voicemail. “Baby, I know you’re probably almost here, but just come up to my office as Miguel. There’s a lot of clients coming in the office today and I don’t think I want any of them witnessing Spider-man crawling through my window at high noon.” You end the voicemail and check the times. He had six more minutes, which means you can go to the vending machine and grab something to drink.

As you leave your office you walk past Bruce and he stops you. “Oh Miss Valentine, remember how I told you about my wife? And the baby?”

“Yes, I remember. Is everything okay?” You ask with concern. “Oh everything is fine. But I wanted to invite you and your husband to the baby shower. It’s being held in two weeks. My wife she’s hopeful for a boy and if it makes my wife happy then who am I to argue.”

You notice that Bruce called Miguel your husband and you don’t correct him this time. “I’m sure he would love to come with me. Is there anything you need? Diapers? Bottles? Toiletries for your wife?”

“I’ll ask her and just get to you on it. I still can’t believe I’m going to be a father.” He smiles wide and you feel happy for him. “I know you don’t want to know the gender but what do you hope she has?” You ask as you put your money into the vending machine and press L7.

“Truthfully, I want a girl. I grew up with all boys and I think a girl would be nice in the family. When are you and your husband going to have kids?” You shrug. “I’m not sure, I want to talk to him about it one day though.”

“Talk to me about what, amor?” You look down the hall and you see your pretty hazel eyed beauty walking towards you. “Bruce and his wife are expecting. So they invited us to their baby shower.” You say grabbing your snack from the vending machine.

Miguel’s eyes light up. “Congratulations Bruce, I am happy for you. Please send us the details and we will be there. Amor? I brought you something but I need to show you in your office.” Miguel says as his eyes roam your body.

“Bruce I’m on lunch so if you can, make sure no one disturbs me.” He winks at you and you lead Miguel back to your office.

Once the door is closed and locked, you pull Miguel down and kiss him. You back step until your butt bumps against your desk, and Miguel lifts you up and places you on your desk as he moves in close between your legs. “Mmm, maybe I should, web sling here more often.” Miguel says as he slides your skirt up your thighs. “I’m glad you got my message. But you should web sling to me more ofte-get these pants off, baby.” Miguel manages to get his pants down and you shimmmy out of your panties. He gives you a couple of pecks on your neck and he stops, inhaling your scent.

“Hueles tan bien, amor. Now tell me about your day, I want to hear that pretty voice.” Miguel in one swift move picks you up and he flips you onto your stomach on your desk.

He palms your ass and you bite your lips into a smile as you feel his thick dick spread your cunt open. You palm your desk and feel him pounding into you quickly. “M…m…my day, baby slow down. My day was good, until…that news…I….I told you a-Miguel, baby jus…just like that.” You moan out trying to be a bit quiet.

Miguel leans down against you and he bites at your ear. “Mmmm, I thought you liked when I fucked you fast, amor. I thought you liked when I pounded this little..greedy…pussy. Fuck, squeeze me just like that. Wh…what else happened?”

He grabs your wrists behind your back and arches in a way that hits your g spot. You almost squirt from this move but you remain focused…or try.

“I…I’m still mad about the invitation. I…don’t want to talk about D..d…d…Dana but I hate her.” Miguel lets out a moan and kisses your shoulder. “Well that’s why I’m here, amor. To help you forget about her. Maybe I can fuck the memory of her out of you.” He arches your back and you let out a moaning gasp. “Esto está ayudando, mi amor?” You nod, not being able to answer.

“Bien, now let me…tell you about my day. We…amor if you get loud you won’t hear…about my day.” You bite down on your lip as he pounds harder inside of you. You were about to see stars if he kept this up.

“…we have a development…amor, I can’t focus when your grip around me like that. Ay dios mío fuck it.” He grips your desk now and he pounds into you, not caring if you make a noise. Your desk was shaking as you feel yourself trying to stay with your feet on your tippy toes.

“Let go for me amor. I want you to make a mess on this dick. Haz un gran desastre princesa.” You hear a knock at your door but you don’t care. “Coming…” You moan out as Miguel thrusts his come inside of you. He lays on you for a moment and you turn your head slightly and kiss him.

The knocking comes to the door once more and Miguel slides out of you as you fix your clothes. Miguel webs to the ceiling and you clear your throat before opening the door.

Behind the door you see Mr Stark. “Yes sir?” You ask with a fake smile. “I know you’re on your lunch, but I heard noises coming from your office. Is everything alright?” Mr Stark asks as he peeks behind you.

“It is but I seem to be suffering with some cramps.” You hold your stomach and Mr Stark makes a face and backs away. “Oh, well make sure you take care of that. I’ll be going now.” You shut the door and lock it back.

Miguel lands in front of you and when he goes to speak, you press your finger to his lips to stop him.

“My lunch break is for another forty minutes, and you said you would fuck the memories of that woman out of me. So don’t waste your time speaking…just fuck me…”

Previously, Next

[wh0sl3i]

♥︎𝑴𝒐𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒇𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 ♥︎

Bill Kaulitz x Fem!Reader - Fluff

(for context, you had this crush on Bill, but never thought he was the type to get into relationships so you were trying hard to distance yourself, but little did you know there was much to be reciprocated)

It was a Saturday morning and you were woken up by the laughter of 4 teen boys downstairs. You instantly knew your brother, Gustav, had his friends over. You tried to go back to sleep, but couldn't so you put a pair of shorts on with a tank top and groggily walk down stairs to the living room where the boys sat.

"Look who's awake!" the bassist of the band joked, "why the hell are you guys being so loud at 7am on a Saturday??" I asked, clearly sounding annoyed. "We were not!" your brother exclaimed, "Then explain why I could hear you all the way upstairs and over my t.v." they all pointed at Tom and he put his arms up in surprise at how they would throw him under the bus like that. "It's not my fault, I just thought it was funny how easily Bill got worked up when we told him it was obvious the he-" Georg quickly slapped his hand over Toms mouth, making me send him a confused glance. "You guys are weird.." I said walking to the kitchen to get breakfast.

As I pull out a bowl from the cabinet, I hear hushed chatter and someone whisper yelling "go, go, go!". I ignore it and grab the cereal I wanted and poured it into bowl, out of the corner of my eye, I see Bill walk in the kitchen. "uh hey, [name]" I turn to look at him before getting the milk, "Hi, Bill. What's up?" I say with a smile. "I'm sorry we woke you" I look at him and chuckle, "It's all good, I probably shouldn't be sleeping in anyway. Wouldn't wanna miss the chance to say Hi to you guys". Bill smiles, "Is that all you came in here to say?" I felt slightly disappointed until he walked closer to me and spoke again "Uhm.. actually I need to get something off my chest," I nod as he hesitates, "so.. I wont lie, I've been putting this off for a couple years now, but ever since we met I felt this overwhelming admiration towards you and at first I didn't think anything of it, because I assumed it would go away eventually and I couldn't really tell how you felt, but I just want you to know that.. I like you. Hell, I might even love you, [name].." My cheeks got heated and my eyes widened, causing him to look even more tense. "Look, it's okay if you don-" I snapped out of my daze "No, no, no, Bill I've had a crush on you for so long now. You have no clue!" he smiled widely and ran to hug me. "You have no idea how relieved I am!!" I exclaimed. His soft brown eyes looked contently into my (y/e/c) ones and he slowly leaned in, I closed the rest of the space as our lips finally met. It felt amazing, I could've done this forever.

We soon walked back into the living room hand in hand and when the other 3 boys saw, the started cheering and clapping. "Finally, the tension is over" Gustav sighed in relief, "Yeah now there will be a different kind of tension~" Tom said smirking and sipping his drink. Me and Bill blushed and sat down to engage in conversation, finally happy we were able to express our feelings to each other.

Thank you for reading!! I'm open to requests, questions, and constructive criticism!

[accio-victuuri]

💟 yh family concert vlog cpns & some yibo thoughts…💭💬

thank you to yibo-official for feeding us with some content this weekend. it’s been kinda quiet since friday, so this is a sweet treat for everyone before monday comes in.

( excuse this very extra gif i’m using for this post. lol. i’ve just been obsessed w/ how yibo looks in this. the way he turned his head is so cute. soooo… ☺️ )

YBO is back. or the question is, did they ever leave? lol. ever since that news/rumor came out, together with the lrlg post, I was still 50/50. Because it’s hard to confirm things, especially ones that involve his career and what’s allegedly going on. However with the content that’s being released, from OnO to now, it has the same feel as the original YBO. who knows. I’m just happy, like everyone else, to see this kind of updates from his team.

Yibo is not really one to share much personal stuff anymore on his social media accounts so YBO is so important. Plus the fact that they regularly update their IG too ( remember to interact on their please! ) for us international fans gives them plus points in my book.

It’s also a relief to see the negative comments wind down to being non existent. I truly understand why some fans feel the need to complain, but ybo is not really that place. I personally don’t like the idea of acting like an anti in a space that represents yibo. that could just be me tho.

Anyway, I hope we get more! I wanna see the bts footage they have with BTF & One and Only! I feel like they spoiled us with HB’s 1 hour + BTS footage so we’re all expecting to get the same for BTF & OnO. BTF has some restrictions i guess with what they can share since some filming were done in military sites.

Now I wanna highlight this portion of the vlog, with WYB being in a good mood during the last part of the concert.

This was the part where some people were saying that he looked ‘unhappy’, implying that’s because he didn’t wanna be there / cause there are mostly bxgs who attended. however, this clip, and a lot of the moments on the blog told a different story.

He was obviously not dragged in there — crying and screaming to perform. He was invested with his performance. He looked happy to be with his professional “family”. It’s an example of some fans having their own biased interpretation with this event. I respect those who decided to not attend, it’s their choice and money. But it was really irritating to see them nag and bitch about those who decided to support yibo. Plus it’s their own money. They can spend it however they want.

Funny thing is, those big name accounts who were so vocal about being against Yuehua Ent. & attending — did in fact, attend the concert 😂😂😂 so yeah. It’s an age old story. Don’t believe big name accounts, especially on weibo. These KOLs that “lead” fan opinion can be very shady. At the end of the day, we’re all here to support WYB and his projects in the best way we can. 🙏🏼

=====================================

🍫🍦 TIME FOR SOME SUGAR/CPNS !!!! 🍭🧁

=====================================

The fact that the video is 8:05 minutes long which is an example of how kadian/numbers are important. Well, not all the time, but the team takes that into consideration. So if you see them pulling a 10:05, that would be very sus 👀

As usual, some editing similarities….

Again, editing similarities, even if there are so many could still be a coincidence but it’s fun to still pay attention.

Also the details in YIBITO. He has the apple watch! I will never get over the fact that this “detail” is being highlighted like this when it is a popular cpn among turtles and we always look for it.

Some also noticed this “….” Which we don’t know the relevance of, but it could be a clue that LRLG is from Bobo’s team. This is unusual for me, cause ellipsis are usually “…” right?

I’m taking it as a galaxy brain cpn 🌌

ZZ also allegedly got off work today at 19:22, and then ybo posts @ 19:36. Yes, WYB has his own team but since we CPN that their staff could overlap — this timing is interesting. Maybe it needed a final sign off from the other boss? 😂😂😂😂

SHOUT OUT TO BOTTLED JOY, cause WYB was seen using some during the bts. He also took one with him in the Thailand roadshow. So i guess it’s safe to say that he has a good relationship with the brand, despite what others feel about them. He wouldn’t be showing off if he wasn’t. I’m looking forward to his renewal with them and what new stuff & campaign will be in place. BXGs will surely be lining up to support.

-END

[suzannahnatters]

My final Love Like the Galaxy reaccs!!! the tl;dr:  I loved it and it's the sort of show that probably demands to be seen twice because TWISTS and HINDSIGHT so IDK, one day maybe! Anyway it's either on Viki or on YouTube for anyone who wants to see what happens when Jane Austen comedy of manners meets The Count of Monte Cristo, but, like, in Ancient China, featuring an epic romance between a naive sledgehammer engineer girl and the terrifying murder general who cannot help looking utterly besotted with her every time she drifts past: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZZZLpfFwcBprNI6msl3NWt3pdX6F-eGs And now: for the reaccs for episodes 43-56, including the famous Murder Party (TM), check under the cut!!!

If Yang Yang ends up with Smug Scholar instead of her sweet little marquis I WILL throw things (thankfully, the sweet little marquis is getting actual screentime with her)

oh I LOVE this: the Empress apologises to Consort Yue for stealing her husband, and Consort Yue points out that if it's anyone's fault it's the Emperor's, and why should the Empress apologise? it's the little things, you know?!

I love that in amongst all this scowly strategising and betrayal and people's families in mortal danger…there's a whole running joke about whether the armour Niao Niao made her beloved makes him look more like a chicken or a mandarin duck

cdramas asking the real questions

wow they really kept like 90% of the action budget for this episode and money well spent say I

once again murder general is rushing off to save our girl, only this time he guesses precisely where she is and what she's doing, and knows she's probably doing a great job of it :')

GASP we are suspicious of Elder Brother Snacks now???

I've got a bad feeling about him and the crown princess turning out to be bad eggs - almost as though we're building up to a BIG BETRAYAL between our babies

Wan QiQi swaggering into prison in a wedding dress is the energy I aspire to

Hmm… Lou Ben feels very very foreshadowy of an obsessive man making a self destructive choice to grab what he wants no matter how it hurts the woman he loves

All the foreshadowing is REALLY mounting up now - Snacks still caring about NN but not wanting to see her after what she's done, NN observing of another couple that they were birds on the same tree but flew apart when trouble came

Anyway we are all headed for a heck of a third act breakup aren't we

is zisheng,,, allergic to almonds

what an absolutely bonkers twist

poor little Wang Ling! how terrible does her family have to be that she is trying to save her murderous traitor of an elderly husband, just because he treated her better than anyone else in her life?

"he even had a flower garden planted in my courtyard to please me, although he has life-threatening asthma! which means that he can't visit me very often! he's the best husband, Niao Niao!" okay Mrs Charlotte Collins

"Cheng Shaoshang, it seems you really don't know anything about Ling Zisheng" OOOOOOHH

Smug Scholar: a voice of reason. a stickler by the rules. an indefatigable drama queen who is quite ready to beg murder general to go right ahead, be his guest, do crime, because then Smug might get to marry Niao Niao instead

torture is always wrong, revenge kids! that said, it's very funny that murder general has been busy with hot iron and boiling oil all night and found out nothing, while NN has put herself fully abreast of the situation armed with nothing more than…a conversation with a female acquaintance

"wait - all that stuff you did in my name was ALSO in pursuit of your revenge plot? who are you really?" this show keeps serving the best stuff

matching bite marks on the arm is a way cooler idea than matching tattoos tbh

why are you not telling her, zisheng, she already knows!!!

she's sworn up and down (with bitten arms!) that she won't mind, it's keeping this from her that she can't forgive, get a clue!!!!!

ooooo - we have been cordially invited to a MURDER PARTY love the gearchange from Jane Austen Romcom to Jacobean Revenge Tragedy

OK LET'S GO, WHERE'S THAT MURDER PARTY I WAS PROMISED

Glad that we were given this scene of Marquis Chengyang being delusional and Chunyu being Justly Terrified that the young man obsessed with revenge has finally agreed to come to his father's birthday party, it doesn't quite explain how nobody realises this is Very Bad News but at least lampshades it

Since filial piety is the norm in this society, I guess it's hard for the elders to realise just how at risk they are from someone unfilial!

I LOVE that Chunyu (sp? the stepmother) gets a whole speech to point out the hypocrisy of HER continually bearing the blame of "climbing into the master's bed" after so many ppl in the show have ridiculed her for it as though it wasn't a decision made by the marquis

oooooooooooohhh this is amazing: Yang Yang is disturbed that NN's farewell before the wedding sounds like she doesn't ever intend to return home. and from NN's response, she KNOWS murder general is about to do something crazy and is fully prepared to suffer the consequences alongside him

it's…really amazing that during the stretch of the cdrama when the male lead traditionally starts Machinating and Scheming and lying to the female lead about it, THIS show keeps the heroine's agency intact, she sees right through his lies, she is still front and centre. Chef's kiss.

she knows where it's happening; she knowns when it's happening; she's sending someone for news. she's amazing and so are these writers.

meanwhile: murder general refusing to enlighten the marquis as to his true identity is Irene of Athens-level pettiness and I love it

the way this show keeps this whole episode focused on the story's main character even though she has little to do with -

oh wait never mind she has decided to involve herself anyway!!! now we get the entire Cheng family charging into battle? with NN at their head on a black horse? EPIC?????

well THAT was the best of Jacobean revenge tragedy

shocked to discover that Zisheng has Always Known who was really behind the fall of the lone city - he's just been quietly, methodically working through the destruction of all the perpetrators, COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO style

I love a protagonist who holds cards so close to his chest that not even the audience knows what's going on

more than that, it really adds nuance to the show's themes about revenge. Sometimes the system is broken, & even in a good system people will sometimes get away with murder. What to do then?

I can't support the vindictiveness of the leads (& I'm not sure I'm meant to) but as revenge plots go, I like the weightiness of the themes - how to fight for yourself in a world where laws and manners tell you you shouldn't? - better than Dumas' more superficial take.

where did these two henchmen come from, because they are NOT being paid enough to be part of this absolute disaster

also WHEE Niao Niao gets to swoop in and save HIM for once! Well done our girl!

oh what an idiot. what an absolute peanut.

I was pulling for you, murder general, but I'm not sure how you'll manage to come back from doing the One Thing (abandoning her) she asked you not to do

she's still calling him by his false name T_T

something something she only ever knew him by his false name and identity not his true one

moment of silence, please, I'm experiencing an emotion

well, duh - of COURSE Third Prince is here to collect NN to go help him plead for murder general, who has obviously been quietly helping him all along. even better: we don't know if NN is just figuring this out now or has known it for months but she understands it perfectly, just like we do, the moment she sees Third Prince's face

!!! murder general has been deceiving everyone in so many other ways too???????

it's not just that he knew all along who was responsible for the lone city's fall and has just been working silently to gather evidence on them: he ALSO has been playing four dimensional speed chess with palace politics, supporting a totally different faction to the one he was supposed to be aligned with?

IT WAS HIM IN THE PAGODA ALL ALONG????

I just love the sort of character who plays certain things SO close to the chest while also being utterly open and vulnerable about certain other things. like, as long as we trust their judgement for hiding the certain things and know it's not for purposes of control. and while NN does interpret his secretiveness as control, due to her upbringing, it's also easy in hindsight to see things from zisheng's POV: he is playing not one but several high stakes political games, treading a tightrope between the prince he is supposed to be supporting versus the prince who would clearly be a better choice, and now suddenly thrown into the middle of all this is a naive and well-meaning sledgehammer fiancee who is an absolute force of nature but who is not yet quite insightful enough to see and understand where the deep waters run; she's simply driven by personal loyalty to protect her empress' son. and she keeps forcing choices on him: protect her, or serve the Third Prince? and he makes tremendous sacrifices, as with the Tiger Tally, to save both of them. so is he going to take the risk and tell her and trust in her, or is he going to keep her in the dark just about this, until the game is over (it's so close to being over) and he can be as candid about these things as he can be about everything else?

but at the same time, he was so frustrated with her for not being candid with him, for not telling him when the mean girls tried to KILL her, for lying to him about choosing to help the crown prince - he should have known better than to reproach her about this when he was doing exactly the same things to her all along.

I love that the show just doesn't support him in this. for two people who both say they want to work as a team, these two both spend an awful lot of time keeping things from each other. and it's only after going away and thinking about it that I start to see his side of the story at all, because she is so totally front-and-centred in the way the story is told.

oh wow - now she gets a whole speech and thesis statement about how just because she's a woman she shouldn't be shut out of her husband's confidence, and ends: "Ling Buyi is my most beloved person in the world. But I am still me."

I love this show so much

It's really wild that murder general, who everyone knows went on a murderous rampage to kill the entire Ling clan, goes from being condemned to death to the apple of the emperor's eye based on his surname changing

no doubt it's historically accurate and murder uncle, at least, deserved it - but for me it's just another sign of how irretrievably this system is broken, that bloodline so clearly outweighs right and wrong.

I'll be chewing over the question of whether this last-minute aversion of filial impiety ("it's ok! he was doing it to avenge his REAL father!") undermines NN's previous point about the right to filial reverence depends on a parent's conduct, or whether it's an author's saving throw to secure a HEA

"but I can never forgive him for abandoning me - he even swore it was for my sake" aha! How To Critique The Break Her Heart To Save Her Trope (Without Actually Using The Trope??????) this show didn't HAVE to hunt down and kill every bad Asian drama romance trope like this but is that stopping it? no

Empress telling NN that whatever decision she makes, she will support her in - hits like a punch because the only person who's told her this till now is murder general. On the other hand it is comforting, and underlines the themes of NN being a whole person without him, bc she still has love and support!

as an aside, I also like how the show has handled NN's terrible parents. by the end of the show, she's fought for, and won, their respect and support, & has come to understand the pressures they are under. but she will never love them the way she loves the Empress, bc they haven't earned that love. I feel this consolidates the filial piety critique.

we finally get to hear murder general's side of the story - and it's fascinating to hear him say that he failed. he did everything to bring ling yi to justice - and couldn't. the murder party was his failure.

I'm finding the murder party less problematic at this point than the Censorate beating

whoah, the empress is sailing in to admit that she spoiled her children until they were useless, so she's not upset about the crown prince being demoted? seems a rather unfortunate theme if children are only ever bad because of bad parenting

NN still taking absolutely no prisoners in the romance, though: "oh, I understand you perfectly. the problem is that you never understood ME" that's quite a burn

The Empress is now requesting to be deposed, and it's a complicated scene - is she blaming herself, or voicing regrets? I think she's regretting not fighting for herself: as she points out, her accepting a menage a trois has not spoiled Consort Yue's life so much as it has spoiled her own chance at love.

while the show has sometimes been finger-wagging, it's saved here bc she also blames the Emperor for going along with the flow, too, and tamely accepting a three-way marriage.

meanwhile at home, everyone's like "Niao Niao is so mature now!" and I'm sitting here like NO SHE'S NOT, SHE'S HAD ALL THE HAPPINESS CRUSHED OUT OF HER and…….along comes Not-Quite-So-Bad-Mum to say that precise thing, and confess to having been wrong all along???? This show just keeps hitting.

Love that NN's 3rd brother is completely on her side at this moment. he understands the assignment ("break up with murder general and send him away with a flea in his ear") and executes it with prejudice.

oh…mum has repented too late. I'm not sorry for her, but I AM sorry for the way NN chooses to spend the next forever - when there were so many things she wanted to see and do!

and now: five years' worth of mutual pining in excruciatingly aesthetic slomo, thank you

meanwhile everyone in the Cheng family is getting married? Yang Yang is getting married? Mum's warrior maid is getting married? Good for you warrior maid!

Smug Scholar, otoh, has remained UNmarried for our girl, and I actually love the choice he's presenting her - NN doesn't much care who she marries if it's a business arrangement; she just won't marry the man she loves knowing he was willing to lie to her and abandon her

is it really weird that I suddenly want to write the story about the coldly pragmatic fake marriage of convenience between NN and Smug Scholar

!!!! she IS going to get engaged to him??? murder general is going to come back from five years of picturesquely scruffy suffering to find her engaged to Smug Scholar??!?!?!!!??!

oh this will be GOOD

"thanks, but I can ride without stirrups these days" I love that this show is allowing the heroine to establish a life of her own apart from the hero - they have to be complete on their own before they can be good for each other.

and now: a break from reality for an absolutely bonkers carriage chase, which, because this is a cdrama, comes complete with one of the parties trying to extort a proposal of marriage from the person chasing them

I swear this is the third time this exact same cliff has cropped up in this show, one would think that people would know better than to gallop madly down the DEAD END CLIFF ROAD

Empress pays her last respects to the emperor: "I know that if it wasn't for Emperor Li's tyranny you would have asked nothing more than to live a simple life" LIESSSS this man requires a constant stream of drama to live, how would he have survived as a gentleman farmer?

"if you are truly filial, don't exchange your life for mine. Live well." while this show has come down in the end in favour of filial piety, I think that for the most part it keeps filial piety where it belongs: subordinate to ethics - and that's something I can get behind.

With NN decided that murder general is not the man for her and murder general determined to accept her decision, I really don't see how this will get believably sorted out in the next…3 eps. Bc she's absolutely right, he had his chance and he blew it. That said, I was really worried the show would blame her for being unreasonable, but only the recent antagonist has done that

even NN's mother is now telling him: we don't need you to perform guilt for us, we also had our chance with NN and blew it, now we can only defer to her conscience AND YOU SHOULD TOO

so, I guess we're headed for an "undeserved grace" ending, and I hope they make it a convincing one and not cheap, bc it's too late to show him doing any work to prove his repentance.

oh I love this scene: she tells him she forgives him but cannot trust him, and he without defending himself, vows to live well and take care of himself (because quietly protecting the people she cares about is the one last thing he can do for her)

and he won't ever tell her that he's been doing this because he knows it would only make her despise him more!!!

time for the bad family to apologise, the grandmother in particular for trying to control her children, and Niao Niao to decide no longer to carry resentment, but to dwell on the people who love her instead

I love that the themes have largely to do with resisting control, even when it's from family members, and fighting for yourself. Even more, I love that the highest expression of this theme comes in the trust there's supposed to be between husband and wife. Sometimes, lack of communication IS an attempt at control - although on thinking it over I'm not sure it always has been that on murder general's side. but if there's one thing the past five years must have taught him, it's that he's going to have to be be particularly open with this particular woman, because her family HAS tried so hard to be controlling in the past, and she can't take even the appearance of it from him.

somehow, yet another of NN's old enemies has an overly complicated plan to kill her sigh

loving how murder general jumps into this trap and promptly becomes useless and it's time for the lil henchmen to save the day

stop shouting his name and figure out how to open the trapdoors Niao Niao, smoke inhalation is no joke

murder general looks amazing for someone who was just blown up

TEARFUL RECONCILIATION SCENE

ahaha Snacks has fallen in love with his wife, we love to see it

Smug Scholar, meanwhile (exact words): are you all done flaunting your love?

EXPLODING PICKLES

flailing I love it NN is deploying her secret weapon….the family Cheng

"you can't be in two places at once, General!"

maybe not, but wifey and he can

"i'd like to see who interferes with my best granddaughter's marriage!"

*smash cut to the emperor having a hissyfit because he can't interfere with the marriage *

it's over? pokes couch cushions for spare episodes

OK I LOVED that murder general's grand gesture in the final ep comes in the form of a dilemma. should he go rescue his beloved as everyone is telling him - or should he stay on task, submit to everyone's ridicule for not protecting his woman, and risk her thinking he's abandoned her again?

his answer shows that at last, he has come to truly understand her (five years after she told him he'd never understood her). it's not physical abandonment she truly fears. what she fears is not being trusted & allowed to act as his equal. So he leaves her to protect Guo village while he stays on HIS task. His grand gesture, after so many rescues, is not to rescue her at all.

SCREAMING at that moment when Third Prince is like, seriously, mate, you'd better not abandon her! she needs help!!! go on I'll be fine!! and Zisheng VISIBLY WAVERS and then pulls himself together and shouts GUO VILLAGE HAS NIAO NIAO! GUO VILLAGE WILL BE FINE!!!

since the root of the contention between them was always him not treating her as an equal, this is probably the best proof of change we could get in the screentime. and the show is very insistent to tell us that if NN bends to take him back, it's because it's what SHE wants, not bc she can't survive without him.

the show does give her that moment of fright during the explosion to rush her past her abandonment issues, but since the real issue was always about control, I can make my peace with it. Similarly, she taught him a 5-year lesson about not consulting her. He knows - & her family makes it explicit - that he can never pull something like this again.

final overall thoughts: I have rarely seen such a well done romance in Asian drama, especially cdrama. The show was long & got repetitive, especially in the 2nd half, even though it had some of my favourite stretches as NN starts fighting for respect & equality within her marriage.

The themes about family, state, and fighting for oneself got fingerwaggy at a lot of points, many side characters were brutally humiliated and many of the numerous female characters became nonsensically villainous just to give NN antagonists. So, I would say the show is quite flawed.

that said, what this show does well, it does SO WELL. I was absolutely invested in this romance to an extent that is very rare for me. I was delighted by the way the show critiques asian romance tropes, there's a wonderful Dumas-level revenge plot, the fight scenes while rare are terrific, the show remains laser focused on its female protagonist all the way to the end, and if you are not delighted by the utterly besotted looks murder general serves up five times per episode, I don't know what to do with you.

[camzverse]

.......Oh buddy...... I believe u've got some tea to spill, >:3

lol.... anyway u call? :P

YAYY OK SO. (side note i only just came up with this today so its not THATt fleshed out but ive been thinking about it like all day so i have many ideas)

so like. it all starts w vanessa. basically when she was really young her parents worked for fazcorp technologies (au equivalent of oscorp) and idk. they die for reasons related to their work there. Who knows whatever its really not important to the au. anyway so vanessas parents r dead now and she moves in with her aunt and uncle in typical spider-man fashion ykyk. eventually shes grown up and when shes in college shes becomes an intern at fazcorp technologies' lab. at the end of her internship she secretly goes to the main room where theyre genetically modifying animals. i guess shes curious bc thats what her parents had been working on before they died. she mainly notices the giant tube of spiders they were working on and she ends up walking right up to the spiders, to take a look and as she gets really close, one crawls on her and bites her. she didnt realize she got bit but thats what makes her get out of there. Anddd thats how nessa becomes spider-van (working name) :3

shes the citys 1 and only spider-van for maybeee 4 years after that point? she graduated just a couple of months after grtting spider powers. also she lives with tape girl btw and they were roommates in college too. after like the first year tape girl (i havent named her yet siiighh) finds out ness is spidervan and she basically becomes her tech assistant. her girl in the chair if u will

anyway so ness has been spidervan for 4 years at this point. and then theres gregory who is just some guy rn :3 hes not spidey yet . one day he and cassie r on a class field trip to the fazcorp tech lab and they get bored so they sneak off and end up in a room with a bunch of different genetically engineered spiders in their own little boxes but one of them is Not in the box bc ig aomeone forgot to close it. andd it bites gregory and greg feels it but he doesnt see it but cassie DID see it and they start freaking out . its kinda funny. andthey do not take him to a hospital nor tell anyone bc they r dumb teenagers and he "feels fine" . so whatevsss they sneak back to where everyone else was on the field trip. andd then they just go home like nothing happened. until the next day when suddenly gregs spider powers manifest and cause HELL at school. yada yada he now has powers and no clue what hes doing with them

ANYWAY SOOO soon enough something happens and gregory meets spider-van by pure chance and she realizes that somehow this kid has pretty much the same powers as her (they got bit by different kinds of spiders so theyre not identical powers) and she offers to teach him how to control his powers so theyre not messing things up all over the place which turns into a mentorship of sorts and that evolves into him becoming a hero right with her ^_^

^theyre like this to me

fun little heroic spider duo adventures ensue from then on. saving the city and such. UHH THATS ALL FOLKS!! ok well thats all i can think of to say for now. thats all [the relevant background information] folks!!

[ladycamillewrites]

Against the odds

Chapter 4 - Mister Kray

Word count: 4,5k

a/n: Chat Style - description of the movie plot and characters they play

warnings: 18+ filming of sex scene, language, toxic ex - gaslighting

masterlist

“Damn! Mister Hiddleston!” You hollered grinning. A playful appreciation of Tom's look as he emerged from the little studio where all your make-up artists and costume designers were swirling around like busy bees. 

The first two weeks of filming were already over still leaving you with tons of unshooted material left. It was amazing to work with Tom and Jef Goldbloom who played your father, the third and last of the bigger roles.

The first week was mainly a 'getting to know each other' when the group clicked immediately. Tom and you had quickly revived the ever simmering embers of your friendship while he and Jeff recently had worked together in Ragnarok. He was incredibly sympathetic and so was the female director Anne. 

You were happy these days. Acting, especially working with such sunshine people was a blissful distraction.

Tom's sharp features were highlighted by a pinch of make-up while his athletic form was slipped into a dark brown suit, visibly tailor made and clinging to his limbs like mysterious snake skin. Damnit, how were you even supposed to remain professional and not drool over your co-star who looked like a storybook villain?

So that’s how you ended up with a few funny remarks and quips to distract your clouded brain from unholy thoughts about Hiddlecharm as you began to call him. It was Chris’ idea but admittedly one of his better ones.

Tom's low chuckle rumbled through his chest, the dark timbre resonating against your eardrums. Whoever exactly picked him, thank you, you thought marinating in the soothing pitch.

He had slipped into his role already, a piece of cake for the incredibly talented actor as you realized while watching him shoot his first scenes. It seemed like he was Mr Kray, radiating exactly what you would expect when reading the script. No, even more. Even more intense. 

“Or should I say, mister Kray, sir?” you purred, theatrically descending the few chairs you had sat on waiting for him to shoot your very first scene together. Not gonna lie, you were anxious as hell although everyone had told you how you were doing a great job. The executive producer even called you a perfect match for Victoria after your first scenes in the snobby law office with Jeff.

But the alluring thought of shooting with Tom, the man you were supposed to fall for at first sight and lose your grace along the ride was something utterly different. Something that could actually bring you uncomfortably close to your boundaries.

“You look gorgeous, y/n” the handsome Brit snickered as you joined him on his way to the set; a scenery on the huge property of the London film company. A street, wet from this afternoon’s rain and slightly darkened due to the late hour was the perfect background for Alexander and Victoria's first encounter...

Victoria Desmond, a young, ambitious lawyer, living up to the expectations of joining her well-known father's law firm. The best in whole London, especially when it came to criminal defence. Victoria didn’t have a clue whether her dad John was involved in some shady business ventures but she didn’t and shouldn’t care about his ways anyway. The young woman was awfully intelligent, a shooting star in her métier not to mention the sex appeal she should radiate throughout the film by wearing tight pencil skirts and not fully buttoned up blouses. She was the perfect innocent temptress who would drown in the underworld, mercilessly pulled by Alexander Kray and his criminal charm. 

Coming to Kray - a ruthless criminal dominating the UK's filthy underworld under the pretense of a fake company selling luxurious jewelry. The company wasn’t fake at all yet small and exclusive but still making a remarkable amount of money. Enough to launder bloody money and to present Kray in a white vest. After a mole had done some damage the prosecutor’s office got ahold of some sensitive documents. Kray seeked help at the countries most prestigious law firm; Victoria's dad's. Of course, the case ended up on her desk making her defend a criminal who had told her everything about his dirty business as if it was nothing and slowly pulled her mind under a numbing spell of devotion. Eventually, she turned her back on the dream of becoming London's chief prosecutor and defended Mr Kray she had been stumbling in a steamy affair with.

God, it had been a lot to take in after you first read the whole script in one night, four cups of coffee had fallen victim to your binge-session. The piece was dramatic, captivating to the last sentence and most of all; fucking steamy. You had no idea about how the hell you would manage three, THREE sex scenes while the first was already nearing but more like in the frightening speed of a sprint instead of a marathon.

It was a heavy challenge without any equal. Especially since you were completely inexperienced in the field of acting, ergo also in faking literal sex.

You had watched every single one of Tom’s films in the last week. Admittedly, you must’ve had watched them at least more than ten times now but of course that was and should remain your little secret. He was a marvel, an absolutely gifted actor nailing everything single role he had played so far. The way he conveyed all the feelings in romantic scenes was dreamy and the intimate parts were… nerve wrecking. 

No wonder the Hiddlestoners were very numerous and ambitious.

Thomas Sharpe? Fucking hot. Robert Laing? God above. Jonathan Pine? Yes please.

He made it look so natural, so real that it was terrifying once your brain snapped back in your own reality. The times you could manage to actually focus on the acting behind the tantalizing scenes, what was unfortunately pretty rare, you were utterly amazed. It was a double-edged sword; on the one side it was relieving to have an experienced friend guiding you through all that but on the other side you were afraid of the close contact, the act you had to display whereas 'act' was meant in the full sense of the word. 

The last time you truly had been intimate with someone was before you and Nate finally broke up. Needless to say it made you extra sensitive to the topic in general. A dumb, humiliating comment of your ex as soon as the movie would be on screen was practically bound to occur only making it harder to work up the nerve to film those scenes.

But Tom was undeniably good looking and you would have given your life to be intimate with him all those years ago. Those few weeks he had spent in your damn house, day and night.

God, you were so torn. It started to get on your nerves.

It was a toxic combination of verdancy in this industry, the fear of failure, malaise due to your traumatic breakup and unstoppably growing emotions for the hot Brit. A perfect mess and you were praying for someone to declutter your heart and mind. 

For Tom on the contrary it was the perfect opportunity to explore his villainous talents he had developed by bringing Loki to live. Naturally, he was about to elongate his success streak. deliver the Alexander Kray everyone would be stuck thinking about even weeks after watching 'The Moralizer'.

The first time you had seen him acting and developing the incredible persona of Alexander Kray curious goosebumps spread all across your body while you had to fight gravity in order to keep your jaw in place. Otherwise it would have dropped to the floor coaxed by the sinister yet totally charming aura Tom had created…

“Take 1, scene 35a. Go!”

“My, my, my... Who would have thought I’d meet my rising star of a lawyer in such a dark, wicked alley” Tom's deep voice growled as the black Jaguar rolled up next to you, the timbre of his voice matching the V8 engine in perfect unison. You didn’t even need to act like you were battling fear and arousal as your eyes met Tom's steel blues. 

“I’m afraid that is none of your business, sir” you snapped, arrogantly tugging a strand of your dyed hair behind your ear and averting your gaze from the handsome man in the flawless suit. Victoria flattered you perfectly, her characteristics just mingling with your own and creating an amazingly real person.

You truly enjoyed playing the rich, ambitious daughter. Why? Well, you needed no explanation to just relish in the magical moments.

“Call me Mister Kray, darling. Although sir sounds rather delightful coming out of your mouth” he cooed, a sly smile dancing around Tom’s sharp features, streetlights casting sinful shadows on the hollowed cheeks. He did look a bit terrifying with a sparkle of manic in his narrowed eyes.  

You were about to inhale sharply, making Victoria pop out an indignant retort to how he called you. Following the script and Anne's previous annotations while it was you to make true to those lines felt incredible. Then, you let your mouth fall agape, eyes widening in the shock of realization before they narrowed again, hiding curiosity that should remain veiled to Mister Kray.

“Right, Ms Desmond. I am Alexander Kray and you will get me out of this mess” he groaned raising a critical eyebrow as he conducted his gaze to travel your body not even trying to hide the profanity. Each of your curves was hugged by the tight black dress and topped with a white blazer. You wore an expensive costume yet you felt naked under Tom's or better Alexander’s interrogating eyes.

What lead to the very first time you deviated from the script, improvising by just saying what your inner Victoria told you. 

“Just because I'm forced to defend your very mindless criminal games, I won’t fuck you” it blurted out of you before you swung your hair to the side, looking fed up and started to walk in the different direction. 

“Come, come! Cameras-” the producer whispered and gestures them to follow you, eager to see what those perfectly harmonizing actors had in store for him.

Tom understood immediately, his face didn’t even twitch for a mere second as he brushed the gas, slowly keeping up with your hasty steps. Effortless, the blonde summoned a satisfied smirk on his velvet lips. God, he was talented just taking what you delivered and forming something completely new. 

“Well hello... I wager the notorious John Desmond isn't aware of his daughter’s bratty mouth?” he snickered eliciting an annoyed scoff from your crimson lips. 

“Are you trying to blackmail me, sir?” you sneered finally and abruptly stopping your strides. A surprised, angry expression lingered on your face whilst your knuckles turned white around the grip of your expensive handbag. The camera came closer. 

“Not in the slightest, miss“ he began mimicking your polite address. “May I offer the lady a ride back to her office?” Tom then asked, his hand curling around the alabaster leather of the steering wheel. Steel blue eyes were flirting with the camera, killing all the women on what seemed like amused purpose.  

“CUT“

“And that’s a wrap. Scene 35a done” 

“This was absolutely perfect! Y/n, we need more of your improvising, it looked so natural” the first assistant instantly remarked completely surprising you with the unexpected compliment.

Was it really that good? Couldn't be since you had the audacity to basically ignore their script.

Jeff just stood in the corner grinning broadly and showing you a solid thumbs up before Tom took your hand and made you turn around in a flash. “You were amazing, darling. Congrats on your first successful impro-scene” he smiled warmly pulling you into a hug you wished would last for eternity.

Nate had never been a man of compliments or real charm so you were even more overwhelmed by the friendly nature of the handsome Brit. 

“Well, without you playing along it would have been shitty” you quipped nervously, the scent of his cologne invading your nostrils like a wildfire. Tom was the perfect charming villain who already made your inner Victoria fall for the haughty ass that was Alexander Kray. You were stumbling towards the abyss of joining her, desperately holding on to your deep friendship as a reason to repress any other feelings.

Feelings you might regret one day. 

“That’s not true, y/n. Let’s get you the nice caramel macchiato with two pumps of sugar-free vanilla and oat milk, shall we?” Tom weaved past you until standing on your right, sliding his arm down from where it had rested to gently wrap around your waist before his long legs coaxed you to go with him. He remembered how you liked your coffee already? How?

A flash of rose lit up on the powdered skin of your cheeks. A beautiful warmth spread in your lower belly emitting from his big hand holding you so lovingly in a place you normally wouldn’t let anyone touch you so easily. Especially not after Nate and his ongoing 'let me touch you' discussions. 

“Liam?” You asked after picking up your phone, hands still wet from taking a shower. It was a wonder the phone even recognized the press of your thumb that created a small water bubble to relax on the blacked out screen.

The youngest one of your brothers you also had a very good relationship to normally preferred to text so it must’ve been something urgent?!

“Hey, boops” his voice echoed through the speaker of your phone as you dried your body and slipped in your underwear.

Today was the day. The first sex scene shoot and the intimacy coach told you to wear a bra you feel sexy in since you were allowed to wear one of your private collection instead of having to wear what the mask and costume team picked out. A small ray of hope in the dark valley of your simmering nervousness. 

“What’s up? I’m kind of in a rush, bro” you panted slipping in the black leggings and wriggling your head through the tight opening of your turtleneck. You were indeed in a rush considering that you’ve wasted twenty minutes in the hot shower fearing the moment you had to get out. 

“Well, erm it’s about your ex” Liam whispered carefully but it was hard either way. Your heart dropped, fingers digging in the soft fabric of your tote bag. 

“The People magazine published an interview with him in which he stated that quote 'the relationship with her was almost platonic. Nothing what would ever satisfy a guy so men, beware'. I read it and I just had to tell you” Liam’s voice explained, the pity clearly audible.

Desperate anger and familiar sadness rose in your trembling body. This was certainly the least thing you wanted nor needed today. 

“Tha- thank you, Li. I’ll phone my lawyer after shooting” 

“I’m so sorry you have to go through this, y/n. I’ll visit you next week, alright?” He cooed trying to soothe his little sister who struggled to suppress hot tears. He knew it what only ached his own heart.

“Okay, thanks. See you, Liam” you whispered shuddering as the short beep signaled the end of the call.

You would have loved to snuggle up in the warmth of your bed, burying hot tears in the silk of your pillows and watching an episode of Friends. But it wasn’t possible. You had a job to do, and what a difficult one today so you got ahold of yourself and stumbled out of the spacious hotel room heading towards the set. 

“Hey, you seem sad…did something happen? I’m sure we can reschedule the shoot if you’re unwell” Tom’s soothing voice intruded your mind as he stepped in the costume trailer where you sat in the corner, shaking.

You looked up at him, all ready in a dark red suit with a checkered tie and brown shoes. His handsomeness never failed to impress you and special parts of your body. God, you would never want him to think he was the reason for your muddled state.

“No, no it’s not that… it’s just…” you stammered biting your lower lip from the tension sitting within you. Tom came closer and sat down next to you, his gentle hand resting on your skirt clad thigh. It felt like a hug adding to the friendly, trustable gaze of his beautiful blue orbs. 

“You don’t have to tell me, y/n. I can just stay here with you for a while” he whispered, smiling as your head leaned over to bump and rest against his shoulder. The Brit loved physical contact to you. Although he had a hard time restraining himself every time you wore those tight, sexy costumes. You were the most gorgeous woman to him and your character was pure gold, especially after the more or less dramatic breakup with Taylor. 

To him you were a woman to cherish. Someone truly loyal and loving he wouldn’t hesitate a second to spend the rest of his life with.

But love was just an object easily buyable in the big grocery store that was the world.

“It’s Nate, Tom. He- he said in an interview that I’m not satisfying and warned all men about entering a relationship with me” you explained, keeping your voice but the words formed surprisingly easy as if your heart spoke to Tom through an invisible wire. A heavy sigh escaped the Brit's mouth, his chest falling with pure disappointment and the wish to snap that man’s neck. 

“Darling, that’s horrible. I'm truly so hear that this idiot still has the audacity to put shame on your persona”.

You silently sobbed and snuggled up against his muscular arm. Shit, he was calming. Maybe even better than Chris or Liam although you’ve known him for just about three months now. The feelings you were unsure about fought their way back to the surface of your consciousness as he told you how talented and gorgeous you were and how he would be happy to have a girlfriend like you. Butterflies danced in your belly making you ready for the upcoming shoot.

Maybe it was a completely idiotic idea to enter such a situation with romantic feelings surging through your veins…

But as the set assistant announced the scene a cold shiver ran down your spine, freezing like ice crystals on the surface of a frozen lake. Fear and embarrassment flooded your body as Tom was instantly back in his role, picking up the incredible cocky and fucking alluring nature of Alexander. The previous scene was already in the box so you started at a 'cold point' what only made it harder.

But you took a deep breath, reminding yourself of Tom’s earlier encouragement and the tips he kindly gave you. Anything but Nate and his straining trouble.

“It’s gotten late. Are you sure such a gorgeous woman should go home now?“ Tom rasped approaching you and pushing you backwards until the edge of his black desk hit your back, forcing you to keep still as his strong chest lurked in front of your face. Tom’s strong pecks were clearly visible trough the white, thin fabric of his dress shirt drawing your coy eyes like a natural phenomenon. 

Training to become Captain Conrad had paid off, obviously.

“Mister Kray, you- what are you doing?“ Your shaky voice asked while greedy hands wandered up to trace the button line and the muscle insertions hidden underneath. You saw Tom shudder lightly under your touch wondering if you should have left it.

Then you felt his hand pinching your chin with two fingers and coaxing your head up to make your eyes meet his. The tension was blooming, slowly allowing your senses to fade out the presence of two big cameras and about five people in the small room.

“You want this, don’t you? Just deny and I’ll leave you alone. Say yes and I’ll show you my generous side“ he growled nearing your face until you felt his hot, damp breath against your lips. Hot ripples ran down your spine at the close contact, something you accidentally dreamt of twice since filming started. Tensing up at what was to come next your left hand instinctively flew back and gripped the edge of the desk.

“No…“ you breathed letting Victoria lose herself in his narrowed eyes which radiated danger and seduction like a black sun.

A twitch shook your torso as Tom’s hand landed on your neck trailing your pulse point like a starved vampire until his fingers met the buttons of your blouse and began to open it slowly. Your mouth was still agape, goosebumps traveling the valley of your breasts as his cold digits brushed your cleavage with every unbuttoned centimeter. 

It didn’t take him long to fully expose your chest and the sparkle in his steel blues hitched, evolving for a moment at the beautiful sight he longed since you had visited the set of Ragnarok. You could swear he was staring at your admittedly very alluring lace bra for longer than intended.

Was he, Tom, aroused by you? Or was it just interest? Fuck, y/n stay in the role!

“Yes“ you finally whispered tilting forward as if you craved his touch, more of his touch. The low chuckle rumbling through Tom’s chest was so unlike his usual laughter sending a hot gush of sizzles between your legs.

God, his deep voice was attractive. But suddenly, as his hands began to actually cup your breasts you nearly lost it, shivering under the many gazes fixed on your body in such an intimate situation.

“That’s what I thought, darling. Such an obedient little girl“ Tom rasped, his thumb caressing your collarbone as he lowered his head bringing his velvet lips closer to yours. Fuck, why did the script have to be like that? But you didn’t have much time to internally curse the alluring lines voiced by Tom Hiddleston because your heart began to hammer against your chest like crazy. It was as if your pulse was doing a sprint.

Tom secretly told you not to rehearse the first kiss beforehand since Victoria’s surprised reaction would look more authentic if it was real astonishment. And of course you listened to him, now facing the consequences of untamable nervousness.

It wasn’t only the kiss but also what followed after pretty quickly without giving you any time to think. The Brit saw the flickering anxiety in your eyes so he winked assuringly as the camera faced his back. A friendly try to calm you down but little did he know there were real emotions involved…

Then your lips met, your eyes fluttered shut at the overwhelming sensation of Tom’s soft lips sealing yours. A gush of emotions broke free from the gutter you had built to keep them in check. The battle was officially lost and your body began to swing the white flag, giving in to the kiss thoroughly.

At first you didn’t even realize the camera so close to your face but when your eyes met the light reflection on the lens you began to panic again.

“Shhh, you’re doing great“ Tom whispered, inaudible to the sound recorder, softening your muscles again before the kiss grew dirty, tongues flicking around each other before his hands suddenly hoisted you on top of the desk, hasty hands ripping your skirt apart.

Did he actually just rip a whole pencil skirt with his bare hands?

“That’s so wrong“ you panted under Tom’s demanding kisses which clearly helped you to let your breath appear labored. The man kept his promise to guide you through this and put the spotlight on you, making you look flawless. Those special feelings breaking free right now were only nourished by his honest and loving nature threatening to make you moan Tom instead of Alexander. A dangerous chess game you unfortunately played against your own heart.

“I’ll make it feel so right. Just let me in, Victoria“ Tom’s deep voice resonated in your ears, your signal to part your legs before Tom stepped in between. The false name gave you some strength again, helped you to to be in a meta level of control of the whole situation which slightly vanished when your task was to rip Tom’s shirt open. To expose his bare chest.

Then everything went by so fast. He unbuckled his belt as greedy appearing hands were on your breasts pressing your back flush against the desk before the real action began. The part of which you were most afraid; faking moans and whimpers and scrunching your face etc.

The whole range.

A shiver spread all across your body as Tom pulled down the panties you wore above the special skin color pad you got for exactly these kind of scenes. Your head was lost in a battle of wishing it would have been your real panties and the grand nervousness of being so exposed and vulnerable in front of strangers.

But Tom made up for it, whispering little words of encouragement whenever his kissed either your lips or your neck.

And that was how you got the boldness to dive in a little deeper, letting your little moans become louder and more unchained while his naked hips rolled against your crotch. This was a sweet little torture to the part of your brain which had craved Tom since your first encounter. His raspy, dirty lines only poured oil in the fire that spread from your belly while you decided to shut your eyes and spare you from the incredibly handsome face contorted in pleasure as if it was real.

“Fuck, you’re perfect. You feel perfect“ Tom moaned coaxing you to arch your back as his fake thrusts became stronger, shaking your body like Charlotte’s in high rise. You were utterly thankful for the tip to just close your eyes if the people’s gazes and the camera became too much hence your body could relax a bit more before the heavy task to fake an orgasm. 

The intimacy coach told you to use your legs and hands to make it look more intense so there you were starting to grasp the edge of the desk and Tom’s lose tie. He was a professional without a doubt but your sweet melodies and the way you acted with your face was dangerous. It was a risk to his spotless reputation as an actor. But the Brit was skilled enough to transform and bring in his feelings into the acting. He delivered a picture perfect impression of Alexander’s sweet relief. 

But deep down he would love to turn this into reality with the woman who conquered his heart.

Faking a heavy panting, your legs sinfully wrapped around Tom’s waist before the final lines of the film were spoken, your eyes opened again and your ponytail messy like it should after pure debauchery.

“Mister Kray… I should really go now“ you whispered under staggered breaths before he pulled you into another kiss. But a different one; a touch of real, unsated sentiment that nudged your heart over the edge.

You had fallen for your co-star Hiddleston. And hard.

“Call me Alex, pretty. And no, you’re staying. You gotta regret this night when the sun kisses your skin again“ Tom began, kissing your neck in between of his lines. “Let me make the remorse so awful“ he rasped, his baritone hoarse and used making your legs clench around him most involuntarily.

But you simply couldn’t help yourself at the words that escaped his mouth and the way his hollowed cheeks highlighted the godly bone structure. Not even to begin with those beautiful blue eyes fucking you with mere subtle gazes.

“Cut!“ 

“Your chemistry is breathtaking! Another one take“ the director yelled clapping above her head in pure enthusiasm while you were struggling to switch out of this vulnerable situation and back in an everyday-mode.

Shit, you internally cursed as you realized your legs were trembling from all the pressure which just vanished so abruptly. This was the most intense experience you’ve ever made. 

“Are you alright, darling? You were amazing. Acting clearly runs in your blood“ Tom cheered as you wrapped his arms around him in a comfort seeking hug. But the handsome Brit wasn’t astonished by your actions, on the contrary he also enjoyed the last moment of intimacy after the steamy scene. 

“Thank you so much, Tom. I couldn’t have done it without you“ you whispered obviously touched by him and his kindness. “Anytime, darling“ he temptingly winked at you before being called to make-up again leaving you standing there alone, only your strong feelings for him keeping you company.

However, the tall Brit with the dreamy smile saw you as a best friend… Didn’t he?

Tags: @crimson25 @kikster606 @huntress-artemiss @123forgottherest @lovingchoices14 @ozymdias @vbecker10 @coldnique @lokixryss @simplyholl @peaches1958 @lokibadguy @jennyggggrrr @stephenstrangeaddictions @holymultiplefandomsbatman @coldnique @gigglingtigger @mischief2sarawr @mypsychoticlove @mochie85 @muddyorbs @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @simping-for-marvel @lady-rose-moon @goblingirlsarah @kats72 @vickie5446 @buffyfan2833 @12-pm-510 @ladymischief11 @somewiseguy @woooonau @cabingrlandrandomcrap

[sxthee]

My blog's just revolving around them now, huh? Gods, there's no escape for this chronic brainrot—

ANYWAY.

You know how when you brainrot on desertduo sm, every song you hear is just about them???? I just had a ponder and invisible strings by taylor swift vaguely represents them???

OKAY HEAR ME OUT—

(Ramble under the cut)

I believe this song can be taken from Grian's internal dialoguing. Like Grian slowly having a soft spot for Scar and realizes he's not all that bad as soon as he slowly got to know him better. Also a great allusion to Double Life that makes use of the "soulmate" thing, wherein that idea is usually represented with strings tied to people (to which where the song will be used!)

Paragraph one. Grian crossed various places just in hopes to find his soulmate (and is walking on grass), and coincidentally, met (or revealed) him surrounded by the greenery. Teal was the color of the shirt could be just his shirt getting wet from the river water that could be visioned as teal-looking. You used to work at to make a little money just basically describes Scar's conman days way back on Third and Last Life, where he would "work" to make a "little money" to which that would be resources.

Paragraph two. Grian was baffled and confused as to how everything fell exactly to where they were at. There weren't any clues to give him a sign of this eventual thing, and for some reason, it's so intriguing. And to him, it's kinda funny at how of all things, he was tied to him. He could not believe that.

Paragraph three. Bad was the blood of the song in the cab (on your first trip to LA) ; clearly, there was somr "hate" in Grian. Hate because he was paired with Scar — someone who's prone to disasters (and whatever Grian has going in with him lmao-) And there was some slight argument between them to which where they should base. Scar wanting to reside in the jungles(?) with the Jellie pandas, and Grian on a hill across Joel and Etho (but it wasnt much of an issue because Scar came to terms with it anyway by creating a compromise himself by bringing the pandad to their base, and it's because he's Scar). While that bad blood part was more on Grian, the "secret soulmate" thing was definitely a bad blood between Scar, BigB, and Grian.

Paragraph four. Now THIS. This is what I believe to be the epitome of the desertduo in this song. As time progressed and they spent more time each other, as what most would agree (and have portrayed them), they would slice each other open out of love, and bleed them out of love, yet they are the remedy to that because they love each other. Like two forces dancing, colliding and creatinf pressure and damage as they draw closer, yet every repel they take would take then closer, to only repeat the cycle again — something like that, that's how their relationship works. And the repetition of the isn't it just so pretty to think all along there some invisible string, tying you to me? Is like something that Grian repeats in his mind over and over again. Yet again, as if he was in disbelief, yet amazed. Like.. "What the hell?" And simultaneously "Wow, he's gorgeous".

Paragraph five. Forgive me if I may have made a mistake in connecting the lyrics to the "canon" story, but as far as I could remember thanks to the desert duo dynamics I see on my feed, Scar was the one who saved Grian, like his blanket — his comfort — amidst the battlefield that they were in. Maybe Grian was still scared of hurting Scar so he pushed him away, yet Scar had his arms warmly open for him, locking away Grian's insecurities by barb wiring, and by forgiving him, and forgetting the past and wanting to move on and live with him in this new life they have. They've gone through so many hardships, and even if they had briefly separated via alliances on Last Life, somehow, they would still wound up to each other's side. (Also, with Watcher Lore being applied + the power of fanfiction, A string that pulled me out of all the wrong arms right into that dive bar: it could be Scar pulling or saving Grian from the watchers without hesitation)

Paragraph six. It's not "canon" compliant, since the two of them are just so— (iykyk) Anyway. If we are to restate this into a fanfiction with no angsty ending, we could say that Grian eventually came to terms with the past and is no longer chained to it.

Paragraph seven. It was at this point as if Grian had accepted it that it was kinda a wonderful thing. He was intrigued and found it beautiful that they were tied by a mere string. Scar gave him a hard time (he did too) and misunderstandings and quarrels were created in the process too, but in the end, it still felt like heaven. Blissful. To be by his side.

But of course this is Grian who were talking about. He may have accepted it. But he won't ever openly admit it.

JSNSKFNEJJRNRNR i have no idea if this made any sense, or had i correctly remembered how it goes to connect it to the lyrics. this is literally just all over the place, i apologizeeee JESNFNDNN what are your thoughts about this?? (-v-")7

[docterzerocare]

had more thoughts on the Qsmp Au i came up with last night:

- Juanaflippa shooting Cucurucho with her gun. it's just a funny mental image to me.

- i had this. idea about Tilin witnessing q!Quackity getting kidnapped. Tilin seeing ElQuackity, who's pretending to be Quackity, and going "You're not my dad. Where is my dad? What did you do to him?"

- Tilin, just in general, refusing to go along with ElQuackity's BS because That's not my father. Stop trying to pretend you're him you're not why did you take my dad away why why why bring him back Please-

- listen. from what i've heard, Maxo is Going Through It, so he deserves to still have a living child. just in general, no more grieving parents. everyone is at least somewhat happier because they've still got their children.

- i have absolutely zero fucking clue how Gegg comes into existence, but here we are.

- the other misc. eggs (A1, the other egg that got found too late) get homes and parents too. for whatever reason, i'm getting the names Arin and Bluebell respectively.

- Arin's accessory would either be a little bandaid on the side of their face or a little yellow flower on their head (a dandelion :]), maybe both, and Bluebell gets a flower crown of forget-me-nots.

- Arin, Tilin, and Juanaflippa (because of Tilin mostly) have formed the "FUCK ElQuackity, All My Homies HATE ElQuackity" Club. good for them <3

- also like. what if the Federation just erased Q's memories anyway, so he comes back and doesn't recognize Tilin anymore. so just. Tilin being so happy that he's finally back only to realize that he doesn't remember them. This Severely Fucks Them Up For Several Reasons.

- i also realized that Tilin is receiving so much angst. i didn't intend for this to happen i swear.

- i've decided that the times that the eggs Would Have died canonically were just really close calls in this au. example, Maxo got to Trump in time, Flippa and Tilin got medical attention in time and were only physically (and mentally) scarred, Arin managed to run away, Bluebell was discovered by Cellbit in time, etc.

- upon realizing that Tilin had no other parent besides Quackity, Slime and Mariana decided that they would also help. Tilin and Flippa were already hanging out so much that they were practically like siblings (and. also pretty much were, but shh), so why not just help with Tilin too?

...well, Slime and Mariana were pretty dysfunctional, but uh. as far as Quackity's concerned, it's the thought that counts, right?

Doc i'm not even entirely into the qsmp but i've gotten attached to these lil eggs help

Oughhigh i love this

Arin and bluebell omg <3

[samynnad102687]

Marauderstober

Oct 10 - RoseKiller - Trying on Costumes

1,308 words

“Evan?!” Barty hollered when he walked into the house. 

This way was easier. He didn’t want to have to search the house for him and lose the idea he had in his head. Evan came downstairs with his hair still wet from the shower that he was probably taking right before Barty came home. 

“What?”

“We are running out of time.”

“For?” Evan asked after Barty didn’t continue. Honestly, he should already know what he was talking about.

“To get our costumes for Halloween,” Barty said as he threw his hands up in the air in exasperation. “It’s already the tenth.”

“Which means we still have three weeks before Halloween,” Evan replied matter-of-factly as if it was that simple. He should know by now that Barty likes to have his costume figured out in September.

“So…” Barty huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. Why was Evan being so calm about this? “We need to go to the costume shop. Like now.”

Barty was impatient. He knew that he was but he didn’t want to go by himself and there was no way that Regulus would go with him. He was probably busy with James anyway.

“Why can’t you go another day? I just took a shower and don’t want to go anywhere.”

“It needs to be today.”

“Why?”

“Otherwise all of the good costumes will be gone and we’ll be stuck with the basic crap for little kids,” Barty was ready to get on his knees and beg if he needed to.

“Do you even know what you want to be this year?”

“Nope, not a single clue,” Barty shrugged.

“I’m not going to waste my evening if you don’t even know what you are looking for,” Evan said as he took a seat on the couch.

“Please?” Barty begged as he fell to his knees and crawled to Evan until he was in front of him.

“I can think of something better to do with you in that position,” Evan smirked as he looked down at Barty.

“Can we go try on costumes after I do that?” He was willing to do anything right now to get Evan to come with him. Not that he wouldn’t willingly do that anyway.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” Evan sighed.

“Yes,” Barty declared confidently.  

~~

Barty was like a little kid when he and Evan arrived at the costume shop. He probably could have come by himself but where was the fun in that? They walked in and he was immediately overwhelmed with how many choices were still there in the tiny shop. It was a local family-owned shop. They walked around and picked out so many options that Barty’s hands were full.

“How about you try some of those on before picking out anymore?” Evan asked when he noticed how many Barty had.

“Ugh, fine but you have to try yours on as well.”

Barty followed Evan over to the small room in the back of the shop where the changing rooms were to try on the costumes. It was one of the things that Barty loved about this little shop. The more commercialised shops only had the option to take the costumes home and hope that they fit correctly.

“What are you trying on first?” Evan asked as he sat down in one of the chairs to watch.

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” Barty smirked before he closed the door and started to undress.

Barty had about five different outfits in the room with him ranging from horror to cute to weird for a guy. Not that he wasn’t secure in his masculinity. He picked up the first costume and had to laugh. He had grabbed it as a joke but now he wanted to see what he would look like in it. Barty put on the costume and opened the door to get Evan’s first reaction.

When Barty opened the door, he didn’t know what to expect. The blank stare and Evan clearly trying to hold back his laughter, was not it. He walked over to the mirror and, yeah, he would laugh too. Barty had picked up a pink care bear with the rainbow on its stomach onesie. 

“Why would you pick that?” Evan asked after he got his giggles under control.

“Thought it would be funny,” Barty shrugged. “Didn’t realise that it would look like Pan picked it out for me.

“Just a little bit, yeah.” 

Before Barty could go back into the room and change into something else, Evan had his phone out and was taking a picture. There was no telling what he was planning on doing with that. He would probably send it to Pandora or keep it for blackmail. Who knows?

“Your turn since you think it’s so funny,” Barty huffed as he took Evan’s seat and gestured to the changing room. 

“Fine, I’m going,” Evan held his hands up in surrender and went into the room while Barty took out his phone for payback.

Evan came out a few minutes later and was wearing a black and red ninja-type outfit. It looked hot actually. Especially when Barty saw the fake dagger hanging from the belt loop. If only it was real, Barty might get him the costume and use it for some roleplaying in the bedroom. 

“Well?” Evan asked, pulling Barty from his dirty thoughts.

“Looks good. Would be better with a real dagger though.”

“I could always get one,” Evan shrugged and when Barty didn’t say anything else, he added, “Go try on your next one.”

“Okay. I’m going.”

Barty walked back into the changing room and quickly got out of the care bear outfit. He looked at the other options he had picked and pulled on the Jack Sparrow costume. It came with a pirate’s hat, a wig, and a sword which was plastic but what could he do about it? When he walked out this time, Evan had a giant smirk on his face.

“What are you planning on doing with that sword, Captain?” 

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Barty wiggled his eyebrows before kicking Evan out of the chair and sitting down in his place. “What’s next?”

Evan shook his head and headed back into the changing room. Barty kind of wished that he had paid attention to the outfits Evan had picked but he was so excited about picking out his own that he didn’t even think about it at the time. Evan emerged from the room a couple of minutes later in a full-body black leotard that had a faint outline of something else but Barty couldn’t see it in this lightning. 

“What are you?” Barty asked after a few more seconds of contemplation.

“A skeleton. It glows in the dark,” Evan said as if it was obvious. Maybe it was.

“Oh.”

“Do you not like it?” Evan questioned when Barty didn’t say anything else.

“I don’t know yet. It seems a little plain if I’m being honest.”

“I do appreciate your honesty,” Evan smirked and laughed a little. 

Barty got up and went back into the changing room to put on his third outfit. It was a more feminine outfit but Barty knew a couple of ways to make it work for him. When he came out, he was already thinking of his explanation for when Evan asked what he was thinking but that didn’t happen. 

“Interesting choice, Barty,” Evan said simply. Barty was wearing a maid outfit.

“I know but I have a plan for it if I get this one.”

“I have a few plans for it too,” Evan replied with a hungry look. “I say you should get it either way.”

“You do, do you?” Barty said suggestively. “Wanna buy what we got and get out of here?”

“Oh yeah,” Evan was already moving toward the register. 

@cazzythefrogking @clementinewoolf @maladaptivewriting @multiimoments @lavenderhaze @literally-the-prettiest-star @thebibutterflyao3 @seiworf @emjayeingray @remusregulusrosekiller @heartsoncover @accuratewhereabouts @belowthestarrs

[alwayslosingtheplot-blog]

Where magic comes from

Sometimes I itch until I bleed and still feel the need. I see the blood, the tearing and still feel the skin that is no longer there screaming at me that something crawls along it. My hands and my scalp is where it happens. I prefer the scalp.

It's easier to hide on the scalp. Easier to forget when it finally stops, to allow to scab over. Pulling out those scabs feels good. To catch them beneath my nails and feel the tug and how they trace the hair they travel along. Oh, don't make that face. I'm aware it is gross. i like it anyway.

I hate my hands most days, red and flaky with dozens of tiny thin lines of scratches announcing to the world my lack of impulse control.

Sometimes I worry that the itch is coming from under my skin, something trying to dig its way out rather than an external reaction -what? The power in me dying to be let out? It's not. It's just eczema.

I cut my nails when it gets bad, as far back as I can to give my skin a chance to heal and then regret it when I seek relief.

None if this is the magic, you understand? There is no point in collecting my fingernails for your spells or fighting each other the napkins with my blood. Those bruises are for nothing. I do hope that you were joking about what you claimed to do with the scabs.

You should apologise to your brother. The biting was wholy unnescessary. It would have been even if the whole thing wasn't a stupud waste of time.

Yes, I'm serious. I do wish you had talked to me first. Was it Pip who told you to do this? That bastarding cat...last time I summon a familar, I'm telling you. Not worth the hassle. What else did the little shit say?

What? Canibalised my mentor? Ha! He wishes.

That old goat is still alive, thank you very much for the vote of confidence. She retired. Lives in a ground floor apartment in the city with two Irish Wolf hounds and does a lot of knitting. The wolf hounds just *love* Pip.

Yes, I know the city is too hot for wool. She finds it funny.

But you are wondering where the magic comes from. Thought you could get more by doing weird things with bits of myself that I cut off? If injesting bodily fluids made you magic my boyfriend would be a grand Mage. Oh, don't make that face. Making you think about us having oral sex is as good a punishment as any.

Sorry? So where does magic come from? No idea. No, i'm serious. This isn't a 'wait until your ready' thing.

Well, do you know where time comes from? But you can count seconds? Add up minutes? Judge how long something will take?

And other people understand it more, right?

No. I'm not calling you an idiot. I wish you would listen to what I actually say rather than react to the words you imagined out of my mouth.

How to explain this? Let's stick with the time thing. Other people made sundials, and building that only light up one day a year, right? They made little mechanised watches to count the seconds and ways to tell the hours apart from each other.

People made watches without having a single clue about where time came from. They made calenders to track the moon and their bodies. They did all of that without knowing where time came from.

That's what we are, darling. We are the watchmakers of magic, you and I. Only right now you are learning the days of the week and I'm writing entire calenders. Stop wondering about the where and the why and start figuring out the what of it. Stop looking for shortcuts.

Oh, and apologise to your brother.

[jumpedthenfell-13]

I KNOW i keep talking abt this stupid tdi rewrite au with the gwourtney situationship BUT I JUST LOVE IT SO MUCH SO

this time i wanna talk abt the group i have lovingly called the roommates crew because after total drama they moved in together and when i tell you its a group NOBODY expected I MEAN IT

First off ofc we got our girl Gwen who could definitely afford rent but realized she didn’t want to live alone, surprisingly

Then we got Bridgette, which nobody was really surprised abt because her Gwen and Courtney were all besties and like. She missed sleeping in the same cabin as her best friends but after total drama Courtney kinda like just disappeared from the group tbh

And because Bridgette’s there we also got Geoff, who, a) couldn’t afford rent, and b) was desperate to live with Bridgette SO because he and Gwen also became close at some point on the show she was like ah whatever and they all decided to move in together

And the last person in the apartment. Nobody expected it. Everyone was shocked. Social media went crazy when she moved in with them.

HEATHER ‼️‼️‼️‼️

FOR CONTEXT: after Courtney got together with Duncan after the VERY CLEAR but unofficial romantic thing she had with Gwen that EVERYONE NOTICED BTW everyone kinda just started feeling bad for her for a reason she didn’t know but it was like everyone EXCEPT Heather who ended up just getting tired of Gwen being all sad and went to find her when she disappeared one night

Long story short Gwen ended up telling her abt her and Courtney’s thing (THINKING THEY REALLY HADNT BEEN THAT OBVIOUS) and Heather was just like. Oh wow. WOW I totally didn’t know abt that already woahhh

But what Heather didn’t expect was now she was just. Part of the group??

And by that I mean Bridgette saw her talking to Gwen and forced her to join the little friend group which turned into a little actual friendship which consists of a LOT of like insults and stuff

Nobody really knows why Heather moved in with them because like she’s got some kind of weird friendship with Gwen (again nobody knows how that happened) and she sometimes talks to Bridgette but she’s not close at all with Geoff and now they just live together

Anyways they make no sense and they’re chaos and I literally love them sm and I actually have no clue where the idea of them living together came from but I feel like they’d be so funny and I might post some of those like incorrect quotes things with them