#anyway if anyone has a sibling thing they think would be a more realistic representation of sibling interactions feel free to contradict me

[holygroundgone]

Having so much fun reading umineko (sound novel version) with my lover because i can tell that we are experiencing two completely different versions of every single scene. The amount of foreshadowing and immense density of revelations that make every single character and everything anyone says come off differently is INSANE

They're also so incredibly charismatic in the vn compared to every single other adaptation (uh, except stage, i wouldn't know because i haven't watched) ryukishi's writing is sooooo exquisite, the layering of bombastic character beats with extremely realistic character traits and experiences and how that shapes them and even someone like kinzo is hard to hate due to how exciting he is when he's on screen! However rudolf is a despicable cesspit right away

Reading this especially knowing all the plot beats later on truly makes me feel like maria has to be one of the best intentionally autistic characters ever written, certainly my number one favorite character in umineko. The amount of understanding and empathy ryukishi evidently has towards her and everything to do with her really comes through battler's narrative

Spoilers beneath cut SAM DO NOT LOOK

In particular the moments that have made me so deranged were kanon saying "...even me..." after meeting battler like 😳😳😳😳 HELLO???? i know their heart skipped a beat seeing strong and handsome dumb puppy boy battler fucking help me.

Hearing krauss explicitly say "that man is already dead" had me fucking pogging like damn don't give it away already king!!! but i don't think sam caught on at all, the fantasy scenes already having started without any warning have caught him, though I have tried to gently prime him for not believing every thing shown on screen. It might be time to watch steamed hams: when they cry again because it genuinely is a masterclass example of the level of narrative fuckery when compared to the original steamed hams scene

I definitely feel like the sprites are more representational in order to serve the story than accurate depictions of what they actually look like as people- i find it really ironic that the ushiromiya siblings and their children all have red to blonde hair and shannon and kanon have dark hair when given the bloodlines of everyone involved it feels like it should be the opposite- and given the manga's depiction of sayo-

Anyways, going in, I really feel attached to the "sayo is ikuko hachijo" theory in that i feel like the episodes of umineko being tohya hachijo and ikuko hachijo, ie battler and sayo in a different context, reliving each bottle theory and going over them together. In particular, I've felt like (or want to think) there's a lot of accuracy and vibrancy in particular to Battler's thoughts and experiences, as well as Shannon and Kanon's thoughts and experiences so far that would indicate such a thing, whereas I can't help but imagine sayo would not have written kanon getting flustered by battler in the original theory and the only person who would've been capable of contributing that would be sayo themself.

Well, one way or another, it's a theory i'll cling to with my dear life unless i lose it in the process of reading the vn. I want a happy ending for these characters too much.

[skecherss]

There’s this funny idea I seem to see implied in most comics/fics, that each of the batkids have, like, one special sibling that they get along with, and the rest are kinda just there? That’s a thing, right? Like, Dick and Damian will be buddies, and people seem to think that that’s at the expense of Dick’s and Damian’s relationship with Tim (granted, Tim thought so himself at one point but it’s too soon to contradict myself, let me finish, I have too many thoughts to stop now)

Duke and Cass, I think Tim and Jason sometimes, Steph and (literally nobody because DC refuses to acknowledge that she has more than a tenuous affiliation with the rest of the batfam), those are acknowledged Pals™. Their relationships with any of their other siblings are virtually nonexistent unless it’s just straight-up arguing.

But, like....does nobody have siblings that they’ve learned to get along with....? I feel like I so rarely see instances of all of them getting along in different ways like siblings just DO. And sure, it totally makes sense to be closer to one sibling than another — I’m a lot closer to my brother than my other siblings — but that doesn’t mean your interactions with the others are always fraught with tension or apathy, you’re still able to have your own fun dynamic with them because you love them and they’re different people and it makes sense for the dynamic to be built on different things.

Take my big sister — I barely got along with her at all for years, she’s the only sibling that I honestly thought I hated at any point, and when she moved out I fully expected her not to want to talk to me any more. She didn’t get along with any of us that well. But somehow that’s become a bonding point? I know now that whenever I have family issues, or anything my parents refuse to talk out, she’ll be willing and way too prepared to fight things out for me. And c’mon, couldn’t that be Jason and Damian?

I get along with the brother closest to me probably just because we’ve spent so much time together; we understand each other well and it’s fun to be around someone who can predict your every move and get so much just from an eyebrow raise. That could be Tim and Cass — both so wired to read people that it’s like second nature to understand each other and know instinctively that the other person loves to have it reciprocated for once.

My younger brother has had a really hard time learning to reel his emotions in; he’s super sensitive and lashes out easily so it’s hard for him to be nice to people sometimes and vice versa. That was me as a kid. So I get to be the one who’s grown enough to be a diplomat for him, we get to rant about how hard it is to have feelings to each other, and sure our relationship isn’t so much built on a near-psychic link but we still like spending time with each other. Maybe that’s Dick and Jason — not always reciprocated, but there’s an understanding there nonetheless, and unfortunately Jason WILL get extremely offended and possibly violent on Dick’s behalf if he hears him at all insulted.

My little sister and I are only just barely getting along and I still have to fake so much of it because she reminds me far too much of myself when I was younger and it doesn’t sit right, I’d love to avoid her, but she so clearly craves affirmation and I feel like I’m the only one who sees it so I have to be the nice one who treats her like a person and honestly that’s okay too, I’m happy with that too! And maybe that’s Tim and Damian; you don’t need to LIKE your sibling to be decent to them and have concern for their well-being! Tolerance is a relationship!

And, like, obviously my relationships with my siblings aren’t a pattern for all Realistic Fictional Siblings everywhere, but idk, I feel like everything I’ve experienced is a direct contradiction of the classic “one of your siblings is a friend and the rest don’t really matter much.” 

Perhaps I am wrong and it is actually more realistic to only get along with one sibling at a time. But I think that it’d be nice to have a silly made-up alternate universe where it wasn’t that way.

[trutrustories]

Okay, this will be probably long and with many errors (my english isn´t very good) But I saw several posts here on Lokius tag, talking about this ship as result of gay fetish, and about non existing chemistry and  how this ship doesn´t make sense etc… And from what I understood there is tagged Lokius because of genuine interest to understand others point of view, so here is mine: I wil try to explain where my frustration comes from, and how I feel about Lokius, Sylkie, AND representation + some other things which I saw here somewhere. But first of all: I like Sylvie, I don´t hate sylkie shipers, and after so many years reading fan fictions, I don´t mind selfcest – I read weirder things. I have some issues with this ship (the mainlythe fact that it isn´t Lokius), but  this is not one of them. Also, I am not about to tell anyone, they shouldn´t ship sylkie.Ship whatever. And I LOVED the show as a whole. 

I just want to defend my standpoint, that Lokius does make sense, people shipping it does make sense and whether it will happen or not, (I don´t have my hopes very high, and I learned to be very skeptical in this regard ) it is more than just about crack ship, or fetish. I´m honestly blown away that people are still surprised that this ship became a thing :D First of all, let´s look at some romantic story telling and tropes: I mean the way they introduced them in the first two episodes set the tone for all series and how the heck this isn´t romantic? Somehow there are all these romantic tropes existing in a show. They´re just there. Just chilling between Loki and Mobius and large portion of audience can´t even see them. (and some of those tropes were used for Sylki as well, so you could actually see them side by side)

For example: 1) traveling to the apocalypsis 2) breaking law/rules for the other 3) literally changing for the better thanks to the other 4) arguing like old married couple 5) saying secrets, personal things to the other 6) sharing glances, touches, visibly being happy around each other - in case of Loki happier then we´ve ever seen him before 7) being completely themselfs around each other 8) One knowing everything (even the worst) about other and still accepting him completely 9) teasing, being comfortable and domestic around each other 10) one being literally enthusiastic FAN of the other 11) Mobius defending Loki whenever he has a chance 12) Freaking amnesia trope that they pulled of in the end??? (It could be different Mobius, but point is he suddenly doesn´t know him - and Loki knows more, in contrast with the beggining) 13) the jealousy in ep4 14) Misunderstanding - when Mobius thought Loki betrayed him and Loki (thanks to Ravonna) thought Mobius betrayed him... 15) witnessing death of the other and being absolutely broken afterwards 16) The goodbye hug with romantic music in the backround 17) Saving life of the one (even when it means problems for the other ) - like Mobius saved Loki´s ass at least three times when he was trying to stop others from pruning him. 18) sharing deep conversations about meanings of life, freedom and how it would be fun to make some chaos and ride that fucking jet ski!!! 19) Inspiring the other 20) looking for each other (Mobius didn´t believe for a second, that Loki would die in the Void and the way how in the last minutes of the series Loki run through all places they were together when he was looking for Mobius... and I could go on. Point is, even if they are not planning to make Lokius canon, all these things are used on a daily basis to describe romance in media and they are used here. On top of that it´s just very poetic and cute, that this drama queen and powerful god of Asgard who looked down on people would find his match in someone, who is so quiet, ordinary on the first sight, and basically is just human from 90s, who loves jet skis. Mobius can´t even fight. But is highly inteligent and he also happen to be as good manipulator, such as Loki himself. - That´s why they work together so well. Mobius sees right through him and once Loki understands that, he drops his evil persona. Almost nobody expected to ship it for real. But story itself and chemistry between them just made it probably the most exciting duo in the whole MCU. And I mean it genuinely. Third episode, even though it was beautiful and Sophie was great in it (and is literally dipped in bisexual colors), is the least favorite for a reason. And that reason being, there is no interaction between Loki and Mobius whatsoever. Lot´s of people though that series slowed down a bit. Even when in fact there was more action, then when we watched Loki and Mobius working at the TVA.

(and let´s just talk about evil!Mobius narative for a bit and how some people say he is manipulative and toxic for Loki: show itself explore heavy themes and one of them is in Loki´s line: no one bad is ever truly bad and no one good is ever truly good. And as a theme in a fictional world, it is working as it should, for the  story. When Loki and Mobius meet, one of them just killed lots of innocent people and destroyed almost whole city. The other one is a part of fascist organization – and in the beginning of the series they both believe what they´re doing is right. They´re both bad, they´re both good, they´re both broken. And they are changing with the help of the other.) From all reactions I watched - and there was many of them, lots of people actually didn´t see dynamic between Loki and Sylvie as romantic in the third episode. So it´s not like Sylvie and Loki had unequivocally love story right from the start.

The only difference is that lots of people won´t see romantic tropes, when it comes to two men in a mainstream show – show that isn´t primarily about relationships and problems that queer people has to face. Because in super hero story and science fiction we have to warn audience, that they´re about to watch two man in love, right? At this point It´s just frustrating really. There were many M/M dynamics that used similar story line, as for example Lucifer, or X-files, or Bone collectors. -  But unlike those M/M pairings, no one was making fun of people for shipping main characters in these shows. But when it comes to two men suddenly you´ll see from all corners of the internet: “why can´t it be just platonic?” “There is not enough platonic relationships” “why can´t two man just be friends?” (They can and they almost ALWAYS are) and “if you think there something romantic between them, you´re delusional” “fetishist“ “And for god´s sake just let them be friends, Loki needs a friend more then....” oh wait, but Sylvie is allowed to kiss him. Sylvie doesn´t have to be just friend. (And I must say, that I love Sylvie, I liked most of the interactions between her and Loki and I think she is a great character ((I hope we learn more about her in the future)) it just doesn´t work for me as well as Loki´s dynamic with Mobius. Maybe partly because of chemistry between actors, partly because combination of characters and they´re personality and also because I had two whole episodes to fall in love with the pair before Sylvie was even introduced.)

First of all: people can be friends and then evolve into lovers. Not only it is common romantic trope, but it is also the most realistic one. And those relationships are usually strongest. second: If people want to see Loki in a platonic friendship so desperately, why can´t it be a woman for a change? They were acting like chaotic siblings for most of the episode three anyway. The age gap aspect is also very funny. Owen is only about 12 years older (That is not that much. But I imagine, some people would get uncomfortable. But If it was man and woman, most of them wouldn´t even blinked. But two men, that has to be somehow automatically son and father figure dynamic) And If you want to dive into age of an actual characters, then good luck with that in a series about gods, variants and time travel. Almost nobody cares about age gap between Lucifer and detective Decker, or Bella and Edward. On top of that, it was heavily implied, that Loki slept with older, silver haired guy in Ragnarok, so it´s not like he would have problem with that.

Different standards are projected in a way how we see romantic dynamics between fictional characters depends on what we are used to, how are we perceiving world around us, what we are expecting to see and ALSO, what we would like to see, that much is true.  When people are used to make no differences between heterosexual and homosexual pairing, then everything what happens to the characters is measured with the same meter. (Even though I experienced queerbaiting many times (( Once upon a time, Sherlock, Supernatural, Good Omens – the last one hopefully is not the case, but I guess we´ll see)) I also saw lots of lgbt shows like Queer as folks and Sense8.) And when we are not used to see it the same way, well… then it looks basically like that one comment under Castiel´s “I love you” scene on youtube, that said  “what a beautiful friendship”.

If we forget about all that chaotic mess behind the scenes (all those articles and contrary messages)  What is happening in a show between Loki and Mobius can be objectively considered romantic and what is happening between Loki and Sylvie in a series can be objectively considered platonic (until the kiss) and vice versa.  And then to see comments about how absurd it is to even think they have chemistry, and about gay fetish - it´s hard to swallow. I read posts about absurdity of a ship and how there is absolutely nothing that would suggests romance.  Well there is, actually. But whether creators are going to work with it or not, that´s something we can only speculate. They already made Loki officially bisexual. So why should it be so absurd to assume, that there is an actual possibility of romantic subplot between Loki and Mobius? Oh right… it´s Disney and Marvel we are talking about.

So on a subject of bisexuality: Bi people can date whoever they want.  But It is a little frustrating, when there is so many heterosexual pairings in the mcu and disney but when there is a promise of lgbt character (speaking of endgame) we get one line about date from a man we´ll never see again. And when there is a promise of lgbt representation you can´t even blink during movie, or you´ll miss it (Star wars, Beauty and the beast). And then Loki said “A bit of both, I suspect the same as you”. And I won´t lie, I was happy. And I think creators made biggest step yet with this one line (which is honestly terrible, that “a bit of both” coming from Loki of all people, is the biggest step forward.) But they played it VERY safe. Obviously, both Loki, and Sylvie are bisexuals, and in three episodes, we had Loki flirting with female flight attendant, Sylvie talking about her relationship with POSTMAN and then they fall for each other. So the only thing that suggests they are really as bi as Lamentis 1 is that little sentence, that can be edited out, or easily overheard. It´s the bare minimum. And I think that frustration with how freaking slowly we´re moving into some progress is understandable. From all those great M/M dynamics I talked about, those, that could make great love story, nothing happened, because too many people “don´t mind gays but don´t need to look at them” or are scared for their children. In 2021.

It is not a fetish to wish for a gay love story in superhero movies/series. (But anyway, I don´t think there is anything bad about it. Some men like to watch lesbian porn, some woman like to read gay porn. AO3 wouldn´t be were it is today, without people reading and writing slash :D – but that has little to do with what we actually see on tv)

I´m not delusional. As much, as I love these two characters together, I know how little chance it has.  I´m not delusional. I´m just in the future, old and tired, waiting hundreds of years for at least one of my OTP to finaly become a fucking canon.

[blindbeta]

Hello 😁

I’m currently working on a story involving a relatively large cast. One aspect of this cast is a family who almost all have a genetic condition that has caused most members of the family to be either blind or severely vision impaired.

Out of this family only one is sighted fully [The father, who does not have the condition.] Another is visually impaired and expected to go blind within ten years and the remaining three are blind, two having minor light perception and one being totally blind.

Out of the blind family members, only one wasn’t blinded by their condition. One member of the family instead lost their eyesight in an accident. She has no issues with herself being blind as she knew that she would likely go blind anyway and was already making some adjustments she thought she may need, but I still really don’t want to portray her badly. She’s portrayed as being very happy and friendly, and she is also helping her older sister, who went blind more recently, adjust a bit. The family is all pretty bright and nobody is portrayed as being, like, ‘angsty’ about their condition. All of the girls have always been aware and came to terms with everything at a young age.

There are also blind background characters!

Do you think this is an appropriate way to portray their family?

Be prepared to have people tell you it isn’t realistic to have that many blind people in one family, to which you can respond by pointing to the genetic factor, especially if the parents both carry the genetic trait. Which genetic condition is this? Anyway, live your best life and have as many blind characters as you want. I certainly do.

I like the variety you have, as well as the fact that only one of them is totally blind. Less than 15% of blind people are totally blind. So it makes sense, I think, that not many in the family would be totally blind. Depending on the condition, you could even give them a bit of sight. It depends on how you want to do it.

As for the one who lost their sight in an accident, I don’t mind it so much considering there is already a variety of representation, she was already going to go blind, and she isn’t all angsty about it. I had a similar experience with the possibility of losing my remaining vision and I figured out that, since many of the things I wouldn’t be able to do as a totally blind person were already mostly off-limits to me anyway, it wouldn’t be a real loss. I was already in a better position than most having already been exposed to assistive technology and the blind community because of my current level of blindness. I imagine this character will feel similarly. She will also have an understanding family to help her. I would just not focus too much on the actual accident or going blind itself or any angsty feelings. Leave that up to blind writers.

I think you could do a lot with this family. For example, they could have more assistive technology than is typical for a family with no other blind kids. A few ideas:

-learning Braille at a young age in addition to print reading and writing

-doing accessible arts and crafts

-bump dots on the microwave and oven or other appliances with flat buttons

-labeling things like milk and juice cartons with Braille labels. Keeping shampoo and conditioner in separate places or in obviously different bottles.

-not being raised to rely on vision, which is common for visually impaired kids

-Growing up listening to audiobooks

-if your setting is modern, the audio descriptions would automatically be on the Netflix account or similar accounts, and Voice Over would be on all screens such as computers and cell phones. For TV, you have to search for a show you want and a channel that might be showing it. Might. Subscription-based services are usually much better. DVDs don’t come with audio descriptions, but movies on subscription services (even Disney+) sometimes do. TV shows usually take a long time, if the get descriptions at all.

-Arriving early to cinemas so the family can get their tickets, snacks, and assistive desvices that let them hear audio descriptions for the movie.

-The kids will be familiar with canes and be careful crossing the street

The point is, growing up with a blind parent and blind siblings will be a completely different expirience.

I think giving the family members a few blind friends will also help. You can creative with the types of blindness for people outside of their family.

I also feel like this family might become Othered for having so many blind family members. Not by the text, but in real life. Able-bodied people and even some disabled people can get weird about blindness, especially a Blind Family. In real life, I’m thinking of a strange Othered vibe I get when some people interact with me, only this would be times ten because it is a family. I think you can briefly mention this, but avoid having the kids or parents force themselves to be around anyone who treats them badly. I think, with this type of story, any sighted people need to be confident in their family and in their own worth. It would be annoying and probably step on blind people’s toes to have one of the kids shun their blind family members to impress some ableist classmate or other. I would briefly mention ableism, to avoid erasure, but not focus on it much if you aren’t blind yourself. You could characterize it as having to avoid certain people or recognizing certain tones. Keep your characters confident in themselves when it comes to blindness and disability. This is where having a sensitivity reader will come in handy, because honestly, this is such a nuanced area even for me. However, with family consisting of many blind people, I think it is something that will inevitably come up in some way.

Hope this helps.

-BlindBeta

[its-sj-i-swear]

Okay so I just really need to say this. I was rereading Red, White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston and I just really wanted to talk about it.

It’s honestly amazing. It should be at the top of your TBR, or at least in the middle. And I know people might not buy into it- which is why I’m going to explain why it’s so great, other than it’s a really cute BL (what else could you possibly want? Well whatever it is, I can assure you this book has it) There are spoilers ahead so... er... yeah. I’ll tell you when they’re about to come up though.

Firstly, the representation. Let’s ignore the obvious sexuality bit for a second, and look at everything else. We have a female Democratic president who won the election right after Barack Obama. Her son, the main character, is bi-racial. Everyone talks about those two things but how about the more subtle matters? Their family isn’t the stereotypical nuclear family- Mom, Dad, and kids. We have a Dad and a stepdad in the picture. And although tensions are pretty high with the Mom and the Dad, that’s realistic. The dad and the stepdad get along pretty well and both Alex (the MC and their son) and June (another MC and their daughter and an absolute QUEEN) love them both which is honestly so amazing. And, about the dad for a second, like he’s on the scene even though the “love of his life” (his words) is with another guy and somehow manages to be relatively okay. And he’s honestly such a good dad- he invites the kids- even Nora who isn’t really his kid but- to his house just to have a good time even though it might hurt that their mom isn’t coming with them. Also, June is the one more into making her own way with her fashion writing stuff and is honestly (this might raise conflict but) as ambitious as Alex, if not more so. In my opinion, it’s harder to make your own way as the First Daughter on something so unrelated to politics versus following in your Mom’s footsteps- or close to anyway- as a guy.

Okay, now to the sexuality and stuff. First, let me just say that there is trans representation which is honestly not done enough and it’s not even a whole thing. Like what I mean is with so many of these things- like someone being trans or there being a random threesome between Nora, Pez, and June, they’re not a big deal. Like, it’s just accepted. Like, June and Pez’s sexualities aren’t explicitly said and it doesn’t matter to anyone because that’s just how accepting they are. Alex is bi and Henry is gay which I appreciate because I’ve read books where both the lovers are gay and though that may be likely, it’s more believable if one is gay and one is bi or pan or something. And the fact that Alex’s Mom and Dad and Stepdad are all so accepting is just refreshing- and yet there is that realism with Henry’s grandma not being as accepting. Oh, and let’s get onto Henry’s family.

⚠️SPOILER ALERT!⚠️

His sister is a drug addict gone clean, and I love how they included that element because it further shows that everyone is honestly trying to get by, and the fact that she’s clean because Henry was lost and didn’t know what to do and cried to her is just... like, woah. Both the sibling bonds in this are just amazing. And Henry’s mom... she’s just amazing. And again, his family isn’t really nuclear either- his dad is dead, which is another huge plot point because it shows the vulnerability of Henry and actually addresses how hard it is on everyone when a family member dies and how they cope with it (Bea-cocaine. Phillip- being a general annoyance to everyone except his grandma. Henry- curling on in himself. His mom- becoming withdrawn).

⚠️SPOILER ALERT OVER⚠️

So yeah. The representation is just *chef kiss*

Okay. Now for the second bit; the characters. Like, can we take a moment? Every single character is so well-developed, even the secondary characters. And there aren’t really any unnecessary characters which I appreciated because some other books just have characters that don’t even do anything and it’s just annoying. But this book wasn’t like that. Every character, no matter how small, had a purpose. There’s no waste of a character, and I like how no character is explicitly evil. Like, Richards is kind of bad, but we can see why he did the things he did. This is closer to real life because there isn’t any clear cut good or evil.

Okay. *rubs hands in glee* now for the character development. We start of with a boy who is ambitious and yet hates himself sometimes for it, and hates the Prince of goddamn Wales. We have his sister who is obviously in the White House and not at uni or whatever because she has to keep an eye on him- which is a little narcissistic if you ask me, but in the least egotistical way possible. You have his Mom who he wants to be like, Rafael Luna (who I’ll talk more about later) who he wants to be exactly like. You have his dad and stepdad, both of whom he appreciates very much. You have Zahra (who I’ll talk about later again and who is an absolute QUEEN) who he’s a little scared of but loves anyway.

⚠️SPOILER ALERT!⚠️

Now, cut to the end of the book. He hates himself and the Prince of Wales a little less and everything else more or less stays the same. So why do we feel like everyone evolved? Probably because we get to know everyone so much more. I mean, we get to know Rafael Luna is an absolute genius, as his Oscar, Alex’s dad. We know Zahra will kick down a door, make half-dressed Henry fall out of the goddamn closet (‘“Quite,” Henry observes.’ Yes I’ve memorized it move on) and finish pulling Alex’s boxers up because he hasn’t yet. And then she doesn’t tell the president because Alex hasn’t come out yet with only the promise that he’ll tell her soon. Like... come on.

⚠️SPOILER ALERT OVER⚠️

So... yeah. It’s the fact that the development is so subtle that it’s literally just us getting to know the characters. It doesn’t feel like development, really, because it seems too natural for that. Like, it’s almost not the characters developing. It’s their situations changing and so they do as well. And the fact that I’m saying that really makes me feel like Casey McQuiston put a lot of time and effort into the seamlessness of this book and it shows.

Taking the seamlessness point a little further, I’m going to be talking about the last thing on my mind. All the goddamn tropes. The way I say that sounds like it’s a bad thing but it really, really isn’t. It’s honestly every cute trope rolled into one.

⚠️SPOILER ALERT! (Although I dunno how you’ve heard about this book and not heard of what’s going to happen ultimately)⚠️

We have the:

* Hated each other for ages but actually it was love all along (Drarry or Snowbaz anyone?)

* Had to pretend they were friends and actually became more

* Cheesy emails that are actually so cute that I might die

* Absolute denial of all and any feelings until the shy one kisses the other one and the other one doesn’t kiss back because THEY’RE STUPID AND OBLIVIOUS *cries* and then the shy one thinks they read it all wrong so stops all and any contact with the other one and then the other one is like WAIT... *insert that ‘I hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me.’ thing* and then corners the shy one and kisses them

* Someone finds them out and the shy one doesn’t talk to the other one because ajdijdowhfoejrjiwjc and then the other one confesses their love and the shy one’s resolve dies because they love them too

* Whatever medium they used (emails, texting, whatever) got leaked and they were kind of screwed but it didn’t matter because they had each other (this trope is only for famous people and generally used in fanfic- I would know)

⚠️SPOILER ALERT OVER⚠️

So there are all those tropes and one would think it would be cheesy and like a poorly written fanfic, but it isn’t and that what makes it so amazing. Every single plot point has a reason and maybe it adheres to these tropes but it’s is by no means unoriginal, which is a miraculous feat.

The entire book is honestly so good, and it is an easy book to get through- it’s a feel good book so there isn’t a lot of angst and sadness, even though there is some. Just... honestly I love the book so much and I thank Casey McQuiston for creating such a thing. I think everyone should read it, so please add it to your TBR.

[kitkatwinchester]

Happy Fanfic Writer Friday (#FFWF)! Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

OMG THIS IS SUCH A GREAT ASK!!! 

Okay okay, because you basically gave me permission to ramble, this is gonna be so freaking long, but I’m doing it anyways, because I want to do every story that has it because I try to do stuff like this a ton, especially in multi-chapter stories!! 

Okay, I’m gonna focus on only AO3 stories this time, since those ones are the ones that really have a lot of this, and I’ll talk about them in order of most recently published/updated (though not all are included in this list because some are simpler than others lol). That said, spoiler alert for anyone who hasn’t read these stories. 

AO3:

Who Knew Birthdays Could Be So Complicated

My favorite thing about this story is that it’s based entirely on poking fun at the fact that so many MCU villains are only villains because Tony made them mad somehow, because I think it’s hilarious and I’m proud of how I was able to poke fun at it while still properly representing the beautiful relationship between Tony and Peter and their individual characterizations. 

This has a very subtle incorporation of Spideychelle, because it takes place after Endgame, but assumes Far From Home never happened, so Peter and MJ aren’t really a thing yet, but you can kind of tell they’re going to be if you take notice of the way they react both around each other and about each other in this fic. 

There’s also a very subtle incorporation of Happy/May for the same reason--Far From Home hasn’t happened (yet), so their relationship is only just starting to come to pass. It’s referenced through Tony and Peter’s suspicious/surprised reactions when Happy suddenly wants to be with May all the time. 

I love the way I made time pass in this fic. At once point, I transition between scene using a watch, and throughout the fic, the passing of time and the number of minutes are constantly mentioned to serve as a sort of countdown as events transpire, and it’s subtle, but I feel like it really helps follow the passage of time and make it all even more realistic. 

It was hard to figure out how to express this, so I’m not sure how many people actually caught this, but I loved how I subtly showed that Bruce wound up finding a way to reverse what he did before Endgame and bring himself back to his normal self in order to help the city better. 

There’s a really subtle reference to Peter’s sensory overload when Perceptivo starts talking about how he was able to grab Peter in the first place. He never finishes his sentence, but the reader and Tony get a sense of what he’s getting at. 

Everytime I write in adorable Peter and Morgan moments, I get excited about it, and this fic is no different. That said, I love the way their relationship is portrayed, even if it is brief. 

Lastly, I love what I did with the chapter titles for this story. The titles match up, outside to in. The first and last chapter parallel each other as general titles (”The Unexpected Surprise” and “The Real Surprise”). The second and seventh title both reference a phrase said/implied in the chapter (”Forty-Three Minutes” and “Unconditional Love”). The third and sixth titles chapter titles that summarize the chapter, with the sixth one being a Star Wars reference, because of course ;) (”Lost Sleep, Long Night” and “It’s a Trap”). And lastly, the fourth and fifth chapters are lines quoted by the Peter and Tony in their respective POV chapters (”I Need to Handle This on My Own” and “Dammit Kid”). I worked hard on those, and I’m so proud of how they lined up. 

Always and Forever

I love love love how the sibling relationship between Peter, Harley, and Morgan develops in this one. I love that Harley and Morgan have an established relationship through video, but there’s still a sense of distance there, and I love how Peter and Morgan have a pre-determined relationship because of the stories Tony used to tell Morgan about Peter, but he doesn’t want to overstep, so it creates distance. I love Harley and Peter knowing about and already respecting each other and then being able to actually get to know each other for real and everything that comes with that. I just love how these three slowly get to know each other, but in a way, they already knew each other so well that they’re basically already family. It’s exactly what I was shooting for, and I’m glad that it seemed to come out that way for readers and for my own self-analysis. 

I am also particularly proud of Morgan’s voice in this story. Peter and Harley, both being teenagers, were a little more natural, but Morgan, as a four-year-old, took some tweaking to perfect, but in the end, I really felt like I could hear the four-year-old innocence and hope and love and I felt like it lined up so well with everything else in the story as she comes to terms with everything that happened and works through it in the only way she can--with help. 

Most of the references/callbacks in this one are super obvious, but there are a couple that are more subtle. There’s a small reference to that “you’re a mechanic, why don’t you just build something?” scene in IM3 where Harley gets Tony out of a panic attack, and to Harley’s dad leaving him. There’s also a reference to Peter’s uncle dying when he mentions that he’s “been through it before”. I also included a little bit of subtlety in reference to the fact that Pepper never actually changed her name to Stark, canonically, and added the emotional element of it in the epilogue. 

Each of the objects/memories that the three kids hold close has a lot of symbolism and intent behind them, and they fit in with the chapter titles. In “Every Picture Tells a Story”, Peter’s memories are in pictures because of the picture of him and Tony in Endgame that made Tony invent time travel (it totally made him invent time travel don’t even try to fight me on it). It represents that timeline of events where Tony really truly had a kid with him that he could love and cherish and who loved and cherished him back, but in a way that never needed words--just actions and photographs. In “Reminders of How it Used to Be”, Harley’s memories are in his phone through text messages, because he and Tony always connected technologically, even from a distance. They initially bonded over fixing the Iron Man suit, and the idea that Tony continued to upgrade Harley’s tech into his later years fits really well into their relationship. Even though they were far away, they learned how to express how much they cared for each other through words and objects. Lastly, in “No Hugs are as Warm as Yours” Morgan’s memories are in a recording of her Dad, because Morgan was the one that Tony truly got his time with--the one that was truly his to cherish and hold that he would never let go of. After Peter, and with Harley’s distance, Morgan was the one that Tony was determined to love with everything he had, and in doing this, he gave her a piece of him every day, and she could always hold him close to her heart and have him do all the special things with her that only he could do. The recording of him, that’s small enough to clutch to her, but big enough emotionally to represent everything her father did for her, and shows a tiny part of something that only her dad does--a lullaby her mom doesn’t sing, and a lullaby he’s never sung to anyone else--is a great representation of the piece of his soul that Tony gave to his daughter, just by being her dad. Maybe I tried to read too much into all of that, but I thought those subtle little representations were really crucial to this story. 

Another thing I love that I tried to break down is that everyone had a different name for Morgan. As the precious little one who just lost her dad, she’s kind of the center of this story, in a sense. Harley and Peter bond over helping her through her nightmare, and that brings the three of them closer. Morgan makes Peter and Harley smile in the dark times, and they do the same for her. Morgan had the most to lose from this, because Tony was, theoretically, the only one she had, but the message of the story winds up being that he wasn’t, because she has all of these other people in her family too. Because of that, there’s a nice subtlety that I had where everyone has a different nickname for her, because everyone contributes to her story and her life in a different way. Pepper’s nicknames/terms of endearment for her are sweetheart and little miss; however, “little miss” is one that Tony used to use, so Pepper only started using it after Tony died (so...in this story). Tony’s other nickname for her, canonically, is Morguna. Then, Peter’s nickname for her is Morgs, and Harley’s nickname for her is Mo. Most of those only really appear once, but it’s a cute little characterization thing that I worked hard to include. 

Lastly, another method of symbolism in the chapter titles is their lengths and, again, parallelism. I already talked about the second, third, and fourth chapter titles, all of which are a little shorter and represent the different object symbols for the kids and their connection to Tony, but I also added some symbolism and parallelism with the first and last chapter titles. Both of those titles, because those chapters have the perspectives of all three children, are longer and include parenthetical statements. Additionally, the first chapter title represents a lot more distance: “It’s Hard to Say Goodbye (To What You Want Forever”. This ties in not only to the fact that Tony’s gone, but also to the fact that, in the first chapter, while all three kids’ perspectives are included, they’re separate and apart. But then the last chapter title, “I Can’t Solve All Your Problems (But I Promise You Won’t Face Them Alone), represents togetherness, which is exactly how that chapter winds up playing out--all three perspsecitves collide, and they wind up helping each other through the grief. Symbolic titles are always fun.

To An Amazing Big Brother

This one is filled with subtle references. Sam leaves ScoobyDoo on for Dean, referenced as a favorite of his several times canonically. Sam also mentions how Dean checks under the bed every night, which was supposed to connect to the scene where Sam tells Dean that his dad said the monsters under the bed weren’t real and Dean told him it’s because he already checked there. Dean’s grumpiness over the lack of bacon is based off of two scenes: the one where Dean’s mad that Sam won’t let him get bacon, and the one where Sam’s mad that Dean won’t buy veggie bacon. The fact that Dean keeps the journal close for the next twenty-eight years is a reference to that photo of Mary that he’s had since he was a kid that he brings with them everywhere. Dean mentioning that Sam had grown up so much in three years is supposed to reference the many times in the show that Dean mentions that he wished Sam could’ve been a kid longer. The candy bars and the Hot Wheel car as his birthday gifts represent how Sam gives him “fuel” for Dean and Baby as gifts in the Christmas episode, and the fact that Sam mentions that Uncle Bobby helped him with it is a reference to Bobby giving Sam the Samulet to give to John in the Christmas episode, which he eventually gives to Dean. Lastly, the birthday pie represents the many, many times Dean says he loves pie. So I guess that all ties into symbolism, references, and callbacks/clues for future scenes, but in any case, there are a lot of them. 

The other thing that comes into this is the symbolism of the photo album. The fact that it’s something Bobby put together shows how Bobby was always a true father for them (at least, in my opinion, but, I mean, come on, he was), and the fact that it takes place over several years and very rarely actually has Bobby in the photo just represents how much he got to watch them grow and how much he was there for them. On top of that, it represents Sam and Dean’s brotherly relationship for two reasons: first of all, it shows how they grew up together and basically never left each other’s side; second of all, the message Sam writes, “Thanks for always being there for me. I know I can always count on you.”, is a huge representation of everything Supernatural is and stands for when it comes to Sam and Dean’s relationship--they can always count on each other, no matter what. 

The Meaning of Christmas

There isn’t really that much in this one, but I did want to mention that I put a lot of research into making the locations as realistic as possible, so Ellen’s Stardust Diner and 7th Avenue are both real streets in NY popular for Christmas shows and Christmas lights, respectively. I don’t live in NY, so I don’t know how accurate any of that was, but I tried my best, and I feel like it worked. 

Training Session

This one doesn’t have anything too deep overall, but it does include a couple of Endgame references and one from Ant-Man. Morgan and Nat’s training with practicing punching was meant to loosely reference the Ant-Man training session between Hope and Scott--with the failed attempt, but slowly getting better. Harley and Clint training--with Clint adjusting Harley’s footing, Harley making it dead center, and Clint high-fiving him--were all references to Clint and his daughter shooting arrows in Endgame. Lastly, while this is pretty obviously an Endgame reference, Morgan does say “I (still) love you 3000”, and Tony says it back, so there is that. XD 

Wow! This was honestly kind of hard to break down, but also really fun! I’ve definitely gotten better at symbolism and references in recent months--most of these were a lot more recent, especially the ones with loads of commentary XD--but in general, I think my character development in pretty good, and I still try to incorporate as many things as I can, subtle or otherwise.

I hope this answered your question, and I’m sorry it’s so long, but this was really fun! Thank you so much for asking! <3

[val-bananatine]

Anyone else here having played dragon quest 11? If so; what are your thoughts about it?

To share my own, warning: a rant incoming:

I personally am a huge fan of the dragon quest series. Started with DQ9 and got so hooked that I bought as many of the older games I could find to play through, got the remake of DQ7 - and was super excited when I heard that DQ11 was on its way (I admit: I was upset about hearing that the 3ds version was only available in Japan, but hey, didn't stop me).

When I first was asked for a review on it, I was amazed and still overly happy about finally having the time to play it after months of it laying around. I... I wasn't as deep in the story yet as I thought, and the further I played, the more I noticed some flaws that started to bother me more and more.

Now I took some time to see how other players and sites viewed it and took a look at their views - and I was a little disappointed to see that those things weren't mentioned. So I will bring them up now:

Again warning: The following will heavily focus on this aspect that I criticize. This is in no way intended to make the entire game bad, it has a lot of other features which add to the image as well. It may seem like I try to make the entire game look bad by focusing on this point, but that is not the intention. The intention lies within shedding light to this and wondering if anyone else has noticed it as well.

I was disappointed to see that the main female cast was weakly represented and that a lot of their lives and backstories revolve around men. Like yeah that can happen but it was 2017 at the release and I feel like we can give more representation than the stereotype, especially when that doesn't happen in just ONE of the female main characters, but in a lot of them (gladly, not all).

To the start of the game: Stereotypically we've got the main protagonists childhood friend who obviously seemed to have a crush on him, and later on was very focused on him. I really didn't mind that because it's just so known I just shrugged it off.

A little later we meet our first female team mates, the twins Veronica and Serena. Was I the only one who was a little weirded out that they introduced themselves (and apparently were raised with that view too) as their sole purpose being to serve and aid the hero? As the story progressed further, I honestly was pretty bothered by how their lives seemed to always have revolved around that and their future apparently only consisting of being the heros’ shield and aid. Gladly much later on in the game we found out about Veronica's life goals, it wasn't much to equal it, but I was glad to see.

It gets weird for me at Jade, the hero's "adopted sister" (Their kingdoms were super close and she explained multiple times how she felt and acts like his big sister). Her first introduction is overly focusing on s*xualizing her (who tf would give her such an outfit for a martial arts fighter anyways? This detailed boob cupping isn't protecting her chest at all), we didn't know then about that family thing. Even more bothers me everything at the Casino where she's been brainwashed by a monster into a flirty bunny girl with a heart choker and uses s*xual styled attacks, on our hero as well like flirting with him. Knowing that family lore made the fight super uncomfortable for me. There's more about what they could possibly be hinting on that happened to her, but I will not go into detail about this as it is highly triggering.

So here we've got our team... but you know what else bothered me? How some of the female villains were portrayed. The MOST disappointing by FAR was Crystalinda for me. Introduced as an incredibly powerful witch in the century of legends where even the strongest mage couldn't defeat her without help of the monsters, a woman who terrorized an entire kingdom and more with just a snap of her fingers - fcking strong and badass. You know what happened to her? They turned her into a moaning mess who lusted after the first guy that found her book. She was obsessed by thinking he's hot and wanting to be his bride, her talking was mostly accompanied by moaning. Reasoned because she was "so lonely and he was the first to talk to her again". Bro tf did you do to this badass woman?! Idc that you reason in her info box that she's a "hopeless romantic". You could have also just not added that, give us a strong villain tf who doesn't melt because one (1) man appeared.

Or the woman with the other world behind the fresco, I only know her German name now and I think I remember that it's different in English. Ruins of one of the most powerful kingdoms back then, she probably was the powerful ruler of it - and she is obsessed with being the grand villains bride. Uh-

TW: MENTION OF S**CIDE

I could also comment on the Mermaid Mishelle, whose entire point of existence was that she fell in love with a man and waited decades for him to come back; only to k*ll herself when she found out that he passed away a long while ago (I did cry though at that story, it was very emotional).

But to be fair: you've also got strong women who don't rely on that as their story. The woman who raised the hero (German name is Petra) and was loved by the whole village and was a strong woman with a strong mind, but of course was a very caring mom too.

Or the queen of the mermaids, her German name is Marina and I love it. She's strong, majestic, wise, and has her heart with her people. There do exist strong females in the more main character section, of course, but a majority is catering for men or being s*xualized in favor of them, and I think that the team could have done better on that.

Now, not all other games have done much better. In DQ5 an important plot is that one man demands to marry one of his daughters or your childhood friend in exchange for a much needed child. But I also remember characters of other games who had more personality than catering. And that's on that.

Story wise it's awesome. Being perceived as an evil by some instead of the hope as always? Hell yeah THAT is a change (my guess is that both, the term "luminary" and "dark spawn" are correct, depending on whose side you look at. Ofc the monsters would fear him and see him as evil, his point is to banish them and keep them away). Well... to Act 2 at least. I don't want to talk about Act 3, but that is a personal preference. Some may like doing everything again from an arc with some changes and a different starting situation... I absolutely hate that, because it gives me the feeling of having done everything before for nothing. And no- I don't wanna sacrifice deep friendships and understandings, redemption arcs and clearing past things up, helping some people out of misery, to get one person back, and lose everything of that in return because only I travel back to that point. And it gets way worse after that anyways.

The writing is... good. It had some of these things you see in "DON'T do that" writing advice blogs (eg awful sibling dialogue in showing how they're siblings) - but I think those flaws in some scenes only stood out to me because I dealt with these blogs just a bit before playing.

Some sites say it's "the best game of the franchise so far", do I agree with that? No. It's a moderate to good game, it has some very nice new mechanics (some which sadly don't have any practical use. Eg being able to walk freely in battles but it doesn't affect that ur getting hit no matter where you stand) and a new interesting story with good throwbacks to older, by now traditional, game settings - but the "new" here wasn't nearly impressing me as much as new things did in previous games. And there's also this flaw with having a problem in diverse and strong female main characters. This isn't to excuse the game mechanics of some of the previous games which sometimes also have a very shitty stereotype dominating (See DQ5) - but again: especially in 2017 (release of the game), where we've an uprising demand and change in better representation of women other than negative stereotypes and flat characters, I would expect a better development of the characters. At least that this problem doesn't take up a good majority.

And you know- amazing graphics (I have to give them that, that was fantastic) aren't the only requirement to be the best game of the series. In fact, graphics should play a minor role as a game can be capturing and fascinating without having the most realistic or detailed graphics. It's about the content in it. So yeah, it's an overall good game, but I wouldn't call it the best - and I really want to encourage a by far better representation on the next game. U can do better.

And yeah, it is a part of many to complete this game, but it sadly was a part that bothered me more the more I played it. Because when I first noticed that one character was bad representation, I took a closer look at the others to see if they do better, and unfortunately a lot didn’t. So please improve this next time, let us have deep female characters again who are strong and badass.

[heartschoicegames]

Heart’s Choice Author Interview: RoAnna Sylver, “Dawnfall”

Find true love and family with a pirate crew at the ends of the universe, where aliens, ghosts, and portals open the space between worlds...and your heart. You are a Navigator, one who creates and guards portals from one dimension to another, wary of the liminal sea between them.

Your universe is made of two worlds: one contains the magic-infused world of Zephyria, and the other, the dystopian space station Eclipse. The worlds are balanced, until one day, an explosive disaster, a deadly energy storm, and an infamous pirate—the Ghost Queen—upend your life and plunge you into a race to save both worlds.

Dawnfall is a 232,000 word interactive romance novel by RoAnna Sylver,  one of the first set of games releasing with the launch of Heart’s Choice. I sat down with the author, RoAnna Sylver, to talk about writing interactive romance. Heart’s Choice games release December 2nd.

Dawnfall has frankly an insanely wonderful setting for a romance game. Tell me about the aliens, the pirates, the ghosts, and the alien-pirate-ghosts.

Hi there! I’m so glad you think this sounds fun! Yeah, Dawnfall is weird as heck, and that’s one of the things I love about this story. It’s weird in a way I don’t think we’ve seen much of before. I really just tried to put in everything I find fun or interesting, and that I’ve always wanted to write. Dawnfall started out as a total brain-candy project, and runs on pure Rule of Cool. Pirates? Yes. Magic? Yes. A slice of cyberpunk? Hell yes. Eerie ghosts and faerie-tale influences and memory-sharing potions? Giant bird people? The power of rock n’roll? Yes, yes, yes.

And also everybody’s dateable, and in a couple cases, dating each other. We weave a tangled web, but I think it’s a pretty badass and spectacular web.

You seem to really neatly straddle the genre fence here with a romance and sci-fi/fantasy. What was challenging about cramming all of that into one game?

Thank you so much for saying that. I’ve always adored SFF, and there’s so much in this genre-collection, so many extremes and concepts and contrasting colors, that I couldn’t limit myself to picking just one to play with. This weird game-book is kind of a love letter to fantasy and science fiction and haunted house stories and cyberpunk adventures—I thought a lot about the Disney movie Treasure Planet for its genre-blending beauty, and the Bioware game Mass Effect for its array of fascinating, multidimensional alien cuties to interact with and date… and then turned it up to eleven.

I guess you’d expect the challenge to be in making it all fit together/be “believable,” but I kind of threw that out the window. I don’t expect anyone to find it ‘realistic’ (setting-wise anyway; I tried to make every character ring true of course), and I don’t really care if someone thinks it’s silly, or doesn’t take it seriously. It is silly in a lot of ways. DAWNFALL is a giant ridiculous queer space magic pirate adventure, and the only goal is fun. If you have fun, I’ve done my job, and there should be something fun in here for everyone.

Did you have a favorite NPC you enjoyed writing most?

Honestly I love them all so much in different ways, and I know them so well by now it’s really second nature. Their voices come so easily and they’re all so much fun. The Queen’s swagger is awesome though, and her mental voice/mannerisms probably come through especially clearly. I love Zenith’s vulnerable moments when xie lets xir guard down and lets go of the need to entertain or please. I love Averis’s journey and growth from cute wibbly nerd to a confident swashbuckler (who is also still a cute wibbly nerd). I love how deeply Oz feels, how strongly he loves and remembers and honors memory, and how unafraid he is to show softness and warmth. And I love a certain spoilery ghost-babe and how they’re so full of joy at the beauty of life.

I do want to give special mention to Aeon, though. This is a story about connection, and I wanted to show that sibling bonds are every bit as important and strong as romantic or any other. I also wanted to show a complex, multidimensional antagonist figure who holds heartbreaking secrets along with authority, and is genuinely trying to do what she thinks is the best thing, and wants what’s best for you, the PC, even if you might not always agree. Her balance between being so emotionally guarded and determined and unyielding, while hopefully being extremely easy to read and tell what she wants and fears and loves—spoiler: you; she loves you!—was a challenge I hope I pull off.

…Also I enjoy any time Vyranix gets his pompous feathered ass handed to him. I think we all know a Vyranix, or at least of one, and it’s always fun to take them down, even in fantasy.

Who would you be romancing as a player?

I’m gonna say “everyone,” and here it won’t actually be cheating, because you can romance everyone! At once! In varying degrees/relationship dynamics and attractions. You don’t see a lot of polyamory-friendly games or books or anything really, and this is an incredibly important thing for me. The second I got the idea for Dawnfall I knew it had to let players romance anyone they wanted and show polyamory in a realistic, healthy light. I’m also a-spec (asexual and aromantic), and having not just good representation but being actively included and welcomed and celebrated in fiction is so huge too.

Dawnfall is a romance of course, being part of Heart’s Choice, but one of the single most vital elements for me is making it inclusive for aromantic and asexual players and player-characters. Essentially, I wanted to write a romance that didn’t penalize players for not experiencing the attractions the way we’re otherwise expected or required—and I’m so grateful that my amazing editors and community not only accepted but supported everything I was trying to do here. (It’s so refreshing not to have to fight for inclusion and freedom. It shouldn’t be, but it is.)

And that’s where the concept of “Heart-Stars” and “Same-Feathers” came from. I’ve never seen anything honor queerplatonic relationships like I’m trying to do here, and I want everyone, of every sexuality and attraction, to feel like they have a place here and can experience this adventure without limits. And I wanted to show that it’s a very normal thing, hence this being the same for the human characters as well as alien. (One of the nonbinary characters being human is also no mistake. I love me some wild alien genders, but there are tons of awesome nonbinary humans too!)

…That being said, I think I gave Averis most of my anxiety-issues, and would really just like to curl up with Oz and watch The Great British Bake-Off. That sounds like a perfect night in my books.

What were some of the things you found surprising about the game-writing process?

Coding was definitely the biggest learning curve. I’d never coded anything before in my life, and it’s such a new skillset to learn, entirely different from any kind of writing I’ve ever done. Sometimes it felt rewriting my brain, which did not at all do this intuitively—and also sometimes like I bit off much more than I could chew (first game ever being not only a huge piece of interactive fiction, but a polyamorous romance with aro and ace possibilities, and so many more variables than expected!), but it’s been worth it. Entirely. If my writing makes anyone feel seen and accepted and invited to have fun as they are, it’s worth every bit of struggle.

Also, oddly, interactive fiction is in some ways easier for me than writing a plain old book! Probably because I love AUs so much, and every choice in a game is like writing a tiny AU of the story, so I get to do the same scenes several different ways. My ADHD-brain finds something about this extremely satisfying, most likely because it somehow feels more like multitasking! Several stories in one, and if I like two ideas, I don’t have to pick just one to write!

Honestly though, I think the most surprising part is just being done, and…that I could do this at all. It was so huge, and took so long, and I learned so much, and every day I’m just kind of going “who the hell am I?” about doing all of this. I’m proud of it. I did a cool thing. And trying to get better at saying that.

And, what are you working on now?

I always have about 8 active projects going at once (which shouldn’t come as a surprise after last question!), but my next interactive fiction game is with Tales/Fable Labs! It’s shaping up to be a Dawnfall-sized project, but a little faster-moving and action-y.

It’s called Every Beat Belongs To You, and it’s a romantic thriller that feels like Twin Peaks meets Mr. Robot, with a smattering of Repo: The Genetic Opera. A creepy Pacific Northwest town with a secret (and a rash of ritualized murders), a super-slick medical research company whose flagship product is a 100% perfect synthetic heart, a mysterious new-age group, and a sister who went missing just before discovering how it’s all connected. Also five simultaneously-dateable (including ace and aro ships!) cuties of varying genders! Who will you trust with your heart?

I’m very excited about Everybeat, which should be just as queer, polyam, exciting, and weird as all my stuff! Aside from that, I’m working on Stake Sauce Book 2, its companion f/f vampire series Death Masquerade, and Chameleon Moon Book 3. I’m not always working…sometimes there are videogames, and sleep. But I really hope to have a lot more fun things to share soon!

Oh, and depending on how this weird, fun thing goes, I do have some ideas for prequel Dawnfall stories; maybe games, maybe books, but the ideas are there. The world—worlds, really—is so huge, and I’m not done playing in it yet! I also have some character art drawn, and I want to do a lot more of them. It’s another way to show love.

So thank you so much! I really hope Dawnfall is as fun to everyone to read/play as it was for me to write. I can’t wait to share it with you!

[freakin-edikan]

More Unpopular Smash Onions

I have a lot of Smash Onions and here are most of them in one post. Be warned it’s long and stupid

Bayonetta Should Not Have Been in Smash Ever

The whole point of Bayonetta is that she whips out these crazy combos and super strong witch tricks to defeat her opponents. The only problem is...barely anyone else can do that because they’re not supposed to because it’s Smash Bros and not Street Fighter. There was no way to nerf Bayonetta without ruining her, and there was no way to keep the Bayonetta feel and style without her dominating the game.

Cloud Should Not Have Been in Smash Ever

He was too fast, he was too strong, he had a projectile. Sakurai specifically said he knew Ike had exactly these stats when Ike was added to Brawl in 2008. He intentionally left them out so as to not let Ike become too strong. But years later, Cloud strutted into Super Smash Bros. for Wii U/3DS with these same attributes anyway. He’s a lot more tame now, but how many Peaches had to die?

The Zelda Characters Got the Short End of the Stick

A game with 30 years of history does not deserve to be represented by three Links, two Zeldas, and one Ganondorf. It’s clear that the development team was banking on the games sticking to its Ocarina formula, which is why they tried so hard to keep all the designs from one game and didn’t introduce anyone who wasn’t a Triforce bearer. By the time they finally stumbled on the idea of giving characters designs from different games, they had run out of space for any newcomers specific to particular games in the series, and the potential for new characters had run out.

I’m aware that Zelda isn’t as popular in Japan as it is in the United States; however, seeing how big Super Smash Bros. and its audience is, I think its representation could be a little better than that.

Zelda Got the Short End of the Stick

You mean to tell me it took 17 years for someone to look at that trainwreck of a moveset and finally do something about it? Y’all ugly.

There Doesn’t Need to be 15,897 Marths

If the devs over at Sora Ltd. played their cards right, our Fire Emblem lineup could have consisted of a balance of characters and assist trophies that could show off the most prominent aspects of the series. My idea is this:

Characters

Marth

Ike

Lyn

Robin

Assist Trophies

A Manakete (from any game)

A Pegasus Knight + Triangle Attack (any game but preferably the ones who made it famous—so Palla, Catria, and Est.)

A main villain (person, any game)

A main villain (monster, any game)

Ephraim?

Micaiah.

...and some cute lil spirits/stickers/trophies with some lore or references or something. If you ask me, we got the characters we got because of poor planning. I might not know the ins and outs of the process, but that’s what it looks like to me.

I Am Singling Out Corrin Specifically

This pick feels like an impulse because of the fact that FE14 was new, but besides that, I (a salty Peach main and Bandana Dee fan) first thought the character was busted. Never before had we a character with such ridiculous range—I thought Shulk’s energy sword Sunday was pushing it. It looks like Corrin set a precedent, though, because tall, adult characters who can reach across the entire stage seem to be the norm nowadays.

The Mario Characters are Out of Character

I think it’s telling when you can’t convey the character of Mario properly. Mario in Smash rather quickly moved away from his friendly everyman balancedness to a very aggressive, very angery Man who apparently just beats the living daylights out of people as the Smash Ultimate music blares in the background. Mario in his games is so much more friendly, eccentric, comical, fun. Smash Mario is way too serious; he doesn’t even smile in his renders anymore. I know, it’s a fighting game; you have to be serious to some extent. I just find this a little odd considering, um...

Peach was pretty similar when she first came to Melee. But when Brawl came around, her headbutt was replaced with hearts, her explosions with hearts, her diplomatic walk with a ditzy skip—it’s all incredibly suspicious. I talked about this before, but I think Smash makes Peach look dumb. I feel like it tries too hard to appeal to the girl who couldn’t pick any of the boy characters because they were icky so she picked the prettiest, girliest girl and that’s Peach. Her character feels like it’s making a mockery of her. (I mean, who remembers the tea time? I remember the tea time.) Nearly all of the nuance in Peach’s character is gone; I like the Toads and it feels like she’s commanding an army, but she herself with the rainbows and the hearts...I don’t know. It makes me. Uncomfortable. Peach has displayed far more competence before; she’s a very intelligent individual, but in Smash it’s not showing.

If I thought Peach was bad, imagine how I feel about Daisy! They barely changed a couple of animations and visuals but no attributes. It feels cheap and lazy and even though she’s an echo fighter, other “clones” had at least a little more thought put into them. And no “Hi, I’m Daisy”??? Preposterous. I think it goes to show that you really can’t make a clone of Peach because her moveset is too unique, and tinkering with it makes it fall apart. I think this was a bad call.

Bowser Jr. seems fine. He’s just a kid with some toys and it shows. Bowser...can at least walk straight, nowadays. But...

Luigi Baby I’m So Sorry That a Ugly Ass Bitch Would Even Do That

So when Smash 64 came out in 1999, Luigi had had his own voice for 3 years. Smash had decided to take Mario’s voice clips and pitch them up instead. This didn’t change until Brawl.

Luigi is Mario’s taller, slippery-er, eccentric younger brother, and Smash played the eccentric up to 11. (I mean, who remembers the Negative Zone? I remember the Negative Zone.) The hip bumps? And the weird dances? And the being able to fall over and be so round that he can just roll back up? I’ve never seen him do that anywhere but Smash. I don’t know who that is with the green hat in Smash. But it’s not Luigi.

The great thing is that he plays like Luigi! But he sure doesn’t act like it. And neither does Mario. And Mario and Luigi don’t play off each other at all, either. They’re so awkward to put together in this game; it’s like an attack on the sibling family unit.

We Don’t Stan Rosalina

We don’t stan her

“We Made Up Lore About EarthBound Hoping No One Would Notice Also We Really Like Pollyanna and the First Eight Melodies and We Exclusively Reference Mother 1 But We Still Won’t Put Ninten in This Game”

Ness is supposed to have defensive and support PSI because he has the highest physical offensive stats—and the lowest IQ—in EarthBound. He can’t use PK Starstorm, or PK Fire, or PK Thunder. He can use PSI Shield and Brainshock and Paralysis and um, PSI Rockin, and though I don’t mind using Ness and Lucas as they are now, I still can’t help but notice how inaccuracy-laden all the EarthBound references were, and that a moveset focused around trapping an opponent to go in for the beat down intrigues me.

Listen, no one else in this game has made-up lore about how their friends taught them certain moves after the end of their game, and how they channeled their big finisher into smaller bursts of energy while taking on the friend’s (much weaker!) signature move as their Final Smash. You could probably explain the magic Zelda uses as they come in crystals anyone could theoretically use, but the framing that they use for Ness and Lucas? It’s pretty silly.

Okay, about Ninten...he doesn’t have to be in Smash. But what’s the point of saying “Mother (Series)” and then making this weird conglomerate of ideas that doesn’t actually get the point across? All three games communicate very different ideas, but hardly any of what’s in Smash portrays any of it very well.

Where’s Bandana Dee

Where is he

Realistic Guns

Joker is about to enter this game with a literal fucking glock and I’m not okay

Final Smashes is the Same

It’s either a Mega Laser, a Giant Stage Hazard, a I’m Gonna Just Ram Into You Like Nobody’s Business, or a Barage of Attacks With One Final Hit. For all the crap I give Peach’s Final Smash, at least it’s different. Oh, there’s a new kind now: the We Stole Snake’s After We Thought He Was Never Coming Back And Oh God He’s Here. Oh No He’s Back. He’s Angry Oh N-

Kirby and Jigglypuff

They haven’t been great for years! I want them back to being good again.

Okay so Jigglypuff was OD’ing in Melee. But insta-death shield break just doesn’t tell me you care about them!

Speaking of Caring About Kirby

I see y’all only putting Kirby’s Adventure and Kirby Super Star content in your game. Look, whoever made Kirby 64 and friends disappeared the same year Sakurai left HAL Laboratory. The new Kirby games acknowledge all of Kirby’s history, and they take many cues from Smash. Smash is a big game, but the least it could do was reciprocate some of that.

The Music Selection is Underwhelming Me So Far

And it’s not the sheer number; I think that’s incredible. My problem is many of the songs are remixes with multiple versions. There are multiple versions of Light Plane from Pilotwings, multiple versions of Magicant, multiple Ballads of the Goddess, a billion Mario Main Themes. There are so many different musicians arranging for these games; are they all sitting there thinking “I’ll do you one better!!” making the same songs again? Some series have one song being remixed over and over while the rest of the soundtrack is just ripped from the original and chucked into the game. Other songs are just weak, which I expect, but they’re just so...mild.

The original music in Smash Ultimate I think is also pretty weak. It’s the same problem Brawl ran into and the only difference is the Ultimate themes are better orchestrated. The arrangement became stale to me and I think it’s because the game is so big that it couldn’t tie itself together as neatly as Smash 64 could (although only one, maybe two people worked on Smash 64’s music).

Stage Hazards

I don’t remember if it’s possible to turn them off but I am tired of the goddamn Flying Man.

So I think that’s about it. Thanks for reading and on the off chance that someone responds to it, you don’t have to go through the entire thing just to pick it apart bit by bit, I don’t want anyone to have to slog through that unless they want to, I guess. Happy New Year!

[tuiyla]

That sibling post reminded me that Sokka and Katara are such a great example of a realistic sibling duo in media. They go from "don't even LOOK at me or I'll smack you" to "I would hide a body for you" in the same episode.

You are so right, my friend. Part of me was thinking about them when I reblogged that post because they are the perfect sibling duo and they are so criminally underrated.

I mean, it kind of makes sense for the Avatar universe (and its fanbase) to prioritize other familial dynamics. Not that Zuko and Azula’s messed up relationship is “better” just because it’s complex in a different way, but it’s… easier to talk about, I suppose. Avatar does family so well and in so many ways but it’s easy to focus on those dynamics that are truly, heartbreakingly disturbed than those that are much closer to everyday experiences. I know you didn’t bring up Zuko and Azula or any other sibling duo but I think there’s this unspoken thing that everyone would talk about them first when it comes to sibling relationships. Or about the cloudbabies, or the airbending kids, or the other great dynamics. But Sokka and Katara? Their greatness lies in the fact that they are so true to everyday experiences.

Just like the other characters, they are still part of this magical world and a war-torn era and they go through some traumatic experiences as children. But at the end of the day, they are the closest we get to a typical dynamic, despite their personal tragedies clearly shaping them. Sokka and Katara are exactly the type of siblings that post described, and you did as well. I think you chose the perfect word there by saying that they’re realistic. They represent the essence of what it’s like to have a sibling and it’s glorious in its simplicity but also showcases so many different shades of the meaning of family throughout the series.

Sokka and Katara fight. Sokka tries to impress so many people and tries to act tougher than he is, but he never does succeed with Katara. She knows him; she’s known him her whole life. She knows where he’s vulnerable and insecure but also knows where he shines and what he’s genuinely the best at. His big boy act doesn’t work on her, both because she knows how immature he can be and both because she already knows what he’s capable of. She tells him off like no one else. Katara might not be the funniest or snarkiest of the Gaang but she throws shade at Sokka like an absolute pro. She’s not afraid to tell him off and go a bit harder on him than on anyone else. He annoys her.

She annoys him. She always has to be right about everything and she can’t help but run headfirst into trouble. Katara would rather risk their incredibly important mission than make the pragmatic choice and leave some Fire Nation citizens alone. She’s stubborn and self-righteous and her sudden rage makes one wonder if in a different life she was a firebender. Sokka’s only slightly older but still older and believes he knows best. His little sister gets carried away and then ruins the fun at the worst possible moments. He knows she can be cruel and he knows the scars of the war run deeper than anything her water could heal.

They bicker more than the other members of the Gaang but it never lasts. Just like real siblings, they can go from “you drive me crazy” to, like you said, “I would hide a body for you”. More than that, they would personally kill anyone who ever harmed the other. They snark each other better than anyone else could but hurt one and the other won’t hesitate to cut you down. They are brother and sister, after all, and family is everything for the Water Tribes. Annoying each other is part of the deal.

Katara acts like a mother towards most people. It’s a combination of her nature and the trauma of losing her own mother at a young age. She stood up and filled a hole at a young age so that others would have someone to rely on. She took on a role that would help her process things too. She started taking care of her older brother at such a young age and never thought twice about loving him with the power of two people combined. He says some infuriating things and needs to learn not to take her for granted, but she loves him anyway. And it’s not like Sokka loses his sister when Katara starts acting like a mother: they still fight and share responsibilities and she still teases him relentlessly. She’ll go further with him than anyone else, push him until she realizes that he’s truly upset. She’ll comfort him about his insecurities and cheer him up by going shopping. She’ll yell at him for taking her for granted but then realizes that she’s been taking him for granted. But it’s alright because they’re brother and sister and they’ll always forgive each other.

Sokka seems like the goofy guy who’ll also plan their greatest missions and be the voice of reason when they need him the most. But he’s also a warrior, a protector of the people. When their mother dies, Katara fills in that hole. When their father leaves, Sokka has to step up and protect the tribe. More importantly, protect his sister. He’ll make fun of her waterbending and stories and idealism, but when they find a stranger he’s distrustful because he doesn’t want her to get hurt. He’ll go along with her ridiculous missions because he would never leave her. Because he would tackle the Avatar, his friend, if he ever were to hurt his sister. People think Aang or Zuko would go mad with rage if anything ever happened to Katara, but it would be Sokka who would be unstoppable in his quest to bring her to safety.

They have so many great scenes together that it’s hard to choose which one to describe in detail. Many of them subtle, just the perfect representation of how their dynamic works. Luckily, they are on the top 15 Avatar relationships list so I will get to gif some of these and write about them some more (whenever I get there, they’re quite high up). But if I were to go with one scene for now? It has to be this.

This, because it’s so heartbreaking yet simple. They both tease each other but it’s usually Sokka who’s wittier and has the perfect response. But Katara is more emotional and careless with words and at her lowest points, she hurts those who are closest. She doesn’t mean it, of course. It’s just all that anger and pain and loss that she’s been feeling and the lack of it that she sees in her brother. It’s enough to make her cruel for a moment. It’s enough to shock Sokka. It’s enough to hurt both of them as they face their shared trauma. But it’s not enough to change anything between them. Sokka, a boy who barely remembers his own mother’s face because his sister has been there for him for so long. Katara, a girl who has been acting like a mother while so deeply missing her own. He forgives her without needing to say anything.

There’s the cliff scene from “The Runaway”, of course, and in many ways, that’s even more telling of their dynamic. I do love that as well, but this one from “The Southern Raiders” always strikes me as one that would only, and could only go down between siblings. I’d like to believe that there was an off-screen apology, but even without that, there’s a quiet understanding. Only a sibling would be willing to look over something like this. You could only say this to a sibling in the first place, but it goes beyond their shared trauma. It makes them even more realistic because sibling fights get ugly and they get personal, but they never stick.

They do represent what it means to have a sibling perfectly. They might not always like each other, but they love one another.

So you might have caused me to think a lot about these two. But thank you for that, because I love them so much and would write about them anytime. They are such an underrated dynamic amidst all the family drama and betrayal and reincarnated friendships and ugly love relationships. They aren’t perfect and aren’t as high-stakes but that’s what makes them so realistic. Their bond is deeper than a lot of people give them credit for. I remember the old days of Book 1 LoK fandom and how people talked just as much about Katara’s loss of Sokka as that of Aang. Because the latter might have been the love of her life but Sokka was her brother and no one could convince me that his death didn’t hurt just as much. It’s been years since I found out that Katara’s still alive and Sokka isn’t and the pain of thinking about that is still too much.

[bookofmormonmemes]

ive been tagged

@swan-darkwingsOk so idk if this is allowed i should probably be doing this on my main blog but idc this got me excited umm @swan-darkwings tagged this blog in this thing and so now i owe her my life. and this post. so here

disclaimer: i. talk. way. too. much.

Rules: answer 30 questions then tag 20 people you’d like to know better

Nicknames: usually just lillie but in the past i went by Lemon and then Lavender and i had some friends who called me Impossible and i had one friend who called me Bug. but i dont really use any of those anymore cus pokemon sun & moon introduced a character named lillie and inspired me to reclaim the proper spelling of my name. representation matters

Gender: moooostly cis female right now but im probably actually some form of nonbinary im not sure at the moment

Star Sign: aquarius

MBTI Type: literally no idea. Ive taken like 8 different variations of the test and they all gave me something different. the last one i took gave me i think enfj but it included percentages of how much of each trait you had over the opposite trait and i was just barely squeaking by in like all of them. maybe i dont have a personality

Height: 5’3” and all my younger siblings are either currently taller than me or going to be taller fairly soon [cries]

Time: 11:01 pm currently but imma queue this thing to post in the morning so who knows

Birthday: february 17th and i expect all of you to send presents

Fav Bands: mmm owl city & oingo boingo

Fav solo artists: taylor swift, lindsey stirling, wait owl city is technically a solo artist too isnt he huh

Song stuck in my mind: this one like...omgsh it’s in a bunch of vines and i have no idea what it’s called but it’s like a. it’s like a saxophone i think? Or some kind of brass/woodwind thingy and it’s like agh it doesn’t have words but the notes are like a long C and then it goes up to a short A E G and then A E D and those few notes are like perpetually stuck in my head and if anyone could tell me what song it is i would be forever grateful

Last movie watched: shrek 2 but only the first half cus i got distracted by something on tumblr

Last show watched: a bunch of random adventure time clips on youtube

When did I create my blog: umm this ones been around for i think a month? ish?? a little more than a month? Idk my memory is trash. but ive had my main blog for like four years

What do I post abt: extreme couponing

Last thing I googled: the definition of ‘incur’ to make sure i was using it right when i said i didn’t want to incur the wrath of georgia w. bello’s ghost

Do you have other blogs: as a matter of fact

Why did you choose your url: cus i wasnt gonna let someone else choose it for me (ง'̀-'́)ง

Following: 301...could do with some more

Followers: 338...could do with some more (actually though this blog is the one with the most followers and it absolutely blows my mind, my main blog has 156 followers and the rest have like <15)

Fav Color: all shades of purple, all shades of pink, most shades of yellow (though the yellow part is a fairly recent development that i entirely blame on steven universe, thanks rebecca sugar. and thank you patti lupone)

Average hours of sleep: hahaha you expect me to do Math during Summer

Lucky number: 17 and pretty much anything with 7, also 39

Instruments: took a year of piano in 2nd grade (which DOES count absolutely 100%) and then violin from 5th-10th grade

What i’m wearing: brown tank top and polka dotted jammie pants that im suddenly realizing are the colors of the ace pride flag, shout out to all my awesome ace followers

How many blankets do I sleep with: there are currently 5 on my bed and ideally i would sleep under all of them. however this is summer so i just suffer

Dream job: if i could get paid for memeing i would be so happy...but honestly im gonna be going to school to be an english teacher which is my realistic dream job that i can very easily picture myself being very happy doing. my unrealistic dream job would be a disney face character which Could be realistic if i lived near any disney parks, and of course itd be amazing to make it as a full-time author or actor but i dont have the patience or confidence to really pursue those super seriously lol

Dream trip: round the world honestly. currently my top dream destinations are ireland, colombia, iceland, the phillippines, and the middle of the ocean

Fav food: okay this is very specific but a tuna fish sandwich except the tuna is mixed with a spoonful of mayonnaise, a squirt of mustard, and a handful of chopped cucumber and/or celery. bonus if you add lettuce or tomatoes or dill pickles. it’s the best lunch ever and it’s technically healthy and i love it so much

aand that’s all the questions so as far as the tagging goes i want to tag all of you because i want to get to know literally all of you so much but 338 is more than 20 so im just gonna go down the top 20 in my notes

@tanosoka@j-the-latter-gay-saint@beepala@inariedwards@hair-fiber@likenolion@afterlifeincorporated​​​​​​​@tanosoka@trellyellyoxenfree @thepoetrytheoristcalledmoriarty @beepala @deetledeet @inariedwards @afterlifeincorporated @tanosoka @j-the-latter-gay-saint @merlissa @likenolion @hair-fiber

@truefactsaboutlies@clever-cyborg@burnt-kloverfield@ariannadon@enigmaris@kensalyn477@bean--teen@beauty-in-the-falcon​​​​​​​​ @truefactsaboutlies @nermrod @clever-cyborg @burnt-kloverfield @ariannadon @enigmaris @kensalyn477 @bean--teen @beauty-in-the-falcon

(i do actually honestly want to get to know you specific individuals i recognize almost all and apprecitate all of you in my notes, though absolutely feel free to not do this if u dont wanna. And if you see this and werent tagged and wanna do it UR TAGGED ANYWAY I REALLY LEGIT WANNA GET TO KNOW U)

anyways thank you for reading and we will get back to our regularly scheduled memeage momentarily