#anyway it’s 3 am where I am and I can’t sleep so it’s highly likely this is all

[exopelagic]

I need to go to bed I’m just gonna shout a lil

[tsintotwo]

[POV: You were born a Dream vortex, and Lord Morpheus has been watching you all your life. Though at this point, he’s doing much more than just watching you... Part 4. Part 3 here

(Oh, gosh. Hot and sweet and turbulent, I loved writing this. Still hoping to wrap this up within the next part. Let’s see...)]

I am nineteen today, and I have my own palace.

I ponder this before the Chief Architect of the Kingdom (we do have one, after all) arrives, responding to my summons.

‘You don’t have to do much.’, I tell him, gesturing around. ‘As you see, the room is already here. Only, it is in poor condition, so rework this. Make it look new, decorate it as elegantly and comfortably as possible. This is to be my bedchamber.’

‘This, my la- Your Highness?’, He is seeing me for the first time, and can’t take his eyes off my face. I don’t wear head or face coverings for men anymore except in my throne room, and I only do it then for the comfort of my people. So, unusual sight for him, I am sure. ‘The Queen’s bedchamber at the foot of a tower?’

Right next to this is the circular anteroom where the spiraling staircase to the top of the tower starts.

‘Yes. And after this, I’m going to show you the tower top. That too you will fix for me. Make it nice. Fit for a Queen to go up sometimes.’

‘But towers are not made for Queens! They are made for soldiers, and Heaven forbid if ever there is a war, soldiers will have to be passing through your anteroom! This is highly unusual-‘

‘I am unusual.’, I interrupt him, ‘And if there is a war in my kingdom and my soldiers are fighting, rest assured you will not find me asleep in my bed.’

I never went back to the dead King’s bedchamber after I took over the palace. I would demolish it to the ground if I could. Instead, I locked it, and have been sleeping in a smaller bedroom nearby ever since. But maybe it is finally time to believe I have survived, and to lay claims to my own place.

This much I will do on the occasion of my birth anniversary, and no more. There will be no land-wide celebration, no feasts at the palace with more food than anyone could ever eat, and enough alcohol to bathe a village. That is how it is usually done, but I would rather not waste money on something that I see as mostly frivolous. And no one here knows my birth date anyway.

I think of my own family, my father and brother, and a sigh escapes from deep within me. Surely, they had news of my imprisonment, my rebellion, and my eventual queendom. Yet not a single word from them, in all this time. They have shunned their dark daughter, dark sister like one would kick away a barking dog. No gifts or good wishes will be arriving for me from that kingdom today.

I knew this, and I should not be still hoping for love from them, but I can’t shake the sadness that wraps around me, and I have a bad day. But then, I have a much, much worse night.

Except for my visits to the heart of the Dream realm, I stopped dreaming- on purpose. The vortex self of me is stronger as I get older, and when among unknown dream elements, I feel it could get away from me, make things volatile. I promised the Dream Lord I would not endanger his realm if I could help it- and even without that promise why would I want to endanger the universe? So, I resisted dreams, and nightmares, and slept dreamlessly most nights. I could choose to do so.

But not tonight. Maybe it is my emotional state, maybe some too-strong dreamfolk finding me, maybe something else, but suddenly I am vulnerable, and I was not ready. In my sleep tonight, I see fragments of my childhood in the old palace, face of my father, disapproving… no, I am dreaming, I have to stop. But as I start forming that conscious thought, gathering power within me to banish the dream, it changes. Nightmares find me. And they come wearing memories.

I am back at my old bedchamber, and the late king- my former husband, savage monster in the shape of a human, advances. I am frozen in fear. This is not real, I remind myself desperately, this is a dream, and I can change this. I reach for my abilities, but they feel too big, too intense, and I am afraid- what if I can’t control them? I try to focus, to shape what I want out of the chaos within, but it is taking too long- the King tears open my body again, laughing. I am naked, bleeding, writhing in pain. I want to scream, but I know, I just know if I do, if I let it out, lose control, I will lose hold of the whole of my churning, crackling vortex self and it will rip holes in the fabric of Dreaming, of reality.

Focus, focus, pull at the stitches of this nightmare, undo it, unspool... the walls are cracking now, the floor breaking up, face of the King crumbling into gray non-shapelessness, and then it is his son- climbing on my body, eyes glinting, knife sharp in hand, oh, oh the pain, and he will kill me- I almost lose hold, and on the other side of my nightmare I can feel others- others’ dreams, everyone in the castle- trying to push in, merge, and I will not let it happen, and with one last shove of strength I push back, channel my focus towards only my defense and nothing else, and the man is gone, disappearing in smoke.

Slowly the room falls away, revealing gray, barren land, and I’m on it, collapsed. I have all under control now, but still I shake violently, body cringed in the tightest curl, eyes screwed shut, mouth clamped down, face wet with tears. That is how Dream finds me.

Barely just opening my eyes, I see him kneel before me, eyes slightly wide, shock turning into grave sympathy as he takes it all in. Have I not been here before? Nightmares attacking me, and Dream arriving to expel them- I was only seven, and oh, how easily I dove into his arms! I yearn for it now- hold me, gather me, or I will melt, I will disintegrate in fluttery pieces and float away in the air, I have no strength left to contain myself within my body, I can feel myself blurring and spreading away and please, please-

But I cannot ask for it, I don’t know how to, so I curl and cringe into myself more, head between knees, arms around them, trying to hold myself desperately. Dream moves. With a smooth pull that looks impossible, he rips away a part of his cloak. Still it doesn’t look like any part has been torn away at all, yet the piece of cloth is in his hand. He kneels and puts it on my body, and for the first time, I realize I’m still naked.

With shaking hands, I pull the cloth tighter around me, and then he’s gently pulling me up. My knees shake, and I almost fall- he supports me, holding my arms. He leads me, and after a slow, short walk- we are at Fiddler’s Green. It’s the most beautiful dream here, soothing, peaceful, and as Dream sits me down on the wooden bench, I know he wants me to feel it- to let it make me feel better. But still in me all is gray, and everything has teeth, biting my insides with memories I tried so hard to bury. Dream sits with me, and I don’t know when it happened, but my hands are grabbing his shamelessly, hanging on to all that is warm and good by this last thread, and if I could I’d never let go. But he pulls away one of them, and places it on my head.

I looked at his face once when he arrived, and looking again now, I’m afraid to see pity, but his soft mouth and heavy eyes are only sad. ‘Look into my eyes’, he murmurs, leaning in close, and as I do, I fall into the cool, bottomless blue, and then I am not here anymore.

I am a child, and at my palace, except nothing is the same, because I have a mother.

She did not die giving birth to me. She is sill here, and she is beautiful, and she is good, the best thing- she loves me, she holds me and kisses me and tells me stories and laughs with me and with her holding my hands, I discover the palace, and the world. My father is kind, and my brother is my friend, and we are a family- and I don’t know what happens in the end, but every single detail of this picture, every groove of conversation and every stitch of sitting together laughing and every pattern of affectionate touch… all of it brings such unbearable happiness, it’s almost harder to hold in than my vortex self. It seems both like a moment and a lifetime, but in the end, opening my eyes, I’m just here, sitting on a bench at Fiddler’s Green, the happiness dissipating like smoke, dry sobs escaping me.

‘Present that could not be’, Dream says softly. 'But it was fair that you might have a taste.’ He sighs, and touches my forehead, ‘Sleep. Sleep, and do not dream.’, Then all is gone, and all is quiet.

__________

In the next days, and months, I am different.

I don’t dream again, but I don’t sleep much either. I can’t. Some locked away thing came out with the nightmares, and it will not let go of me. I’m tired of fighting, so I succumb. Days are dull, nothing means anything, and this ruling and being Queen and everything else- what do they matter?

My councilmen are surprised that I am absent from meetings, relegating decisions to them. This is all they used to want, but now they are wary. They think I am always in my room, locking myself- and that too since the night every single person in the palace had terrible nightmares- because I am preparing for something they cannot imagine. It will not be long before they realize it is just because I see no point anymore. Then they can go ahead and loot and divide the kingdom amongst themselves- let them, what do I care? My maids, guards, people who used to like me- they ask things, and I don’t bother answering, and I assume they don’t like me anymore as I push them away. Days blend into one another, and all I can think of are things that happened to me- I can think of them with distance now, as if watching rather than experiencing, but still, they happened to me, and my body is sullied, and I am disgusting, and I should not be alive playing at being Queen or whatever. I should just stay here, and wither until I don’t exist anymore.

So that is what I do, endlessly and for long, until this night, when I should be asleep but I’m sitting at my vanity like a ghost, not looking at the mirror, not doing anything, when the air changes. I look up, and in the mirror, behind me, I see the Dream Lord.

‘What are you doing here?’, my question after a stretch of silence is asked not in curiosity, but in indifferent resignation.

‘Since my raven retired, I have not appointed a new one.’, he answers calmly. True, I have not seen the raven with him in several years which to an immortal is not much, I suppose. ‘So, I must visit in person when something needs investigating.’

‘I need investigating?’

‘You are the vortex.’, he replies, watching me in the mirror, and I know it’s more than that. Since my nightmare, I have not been to the Dreaming. I have not seen him.

I couldn’t. Dream had seen me at my very worst that night- ugly, disgusting, ruined, stripped bare in all my unworthiness, and after that, I could not imagine my presence being desirable to him, in the Dreaming. How can he see anything else now when he looks at me, anything but the hideous and loathsome self I hid within? I could not sully his realm with it.

All this I cannot say in words, but he walks up to me, coming close, looking at me intently, and with something like distress in his voice, says, ‘Dreams have lost you.’

‘Yes’, I try to sound matter-of-fact, ‘It’s for the best. I mean, the last time happened accidentally- you know I’d been-‘

‘Dreams in the waking world.’, he interrupts me, putting force behind his words, ‘Your aspirations, hopes- my sister has you.’ I can see the realization hit him, the shock of it on his face.

‘Your sister?’

‘Despair.’, he chews out the word- no love lost here. Despair… yes, that seems right.

‘I thought for you she was too weak.’, Dream looks upset like I have rarely seen him, ‘For you, I thought I would suffice.’ He is disappointed, but not in me, I realize. He’s disappointed in himself.

‘I- what do you mean?’, somewhat bewildered, I stand up and face him, forgetting that during all these months I was afraid of looking in his eyes and seeing disgust. He’s not looking at me in any different way at all.

‘So much I have seen you suffer’, Dream says, slow, putting emphasis on every word, ‘and yet, you braved through. You still had hopes, and dreams, and using them you survived. Humans must succumb to my sister one time or another, but you never let her keep hold onto you before. But now…’, in the golden light of candles burning in the room, he looks impossibly sad, ‘I’ve failed.’

‘How did you fail?’, I still don’t fully understand.

He lowers his eyes for a second, ‘A folly…’, he looks up again, ‘You reminded me of what dreams are capable of, mortal Queen. You reminded me of my purpose, of why I must do what I must, why I am. Perhaps…’

‘You’re giving up on me?’, the way he speaks like it’s all in the past makes some kind of frustration, or even anger start to simmer underneath my gray haze of- of despair.

Dream looks astonished, ‘I cannot give up on you, or any human, or any creature that dreams. By function, I am there for all. You have to choose me. Or,’, he steps back, ‘You can give up on me.’

It’s not fair, the way he puts it. It’s not as if any of what I feel is on purpose, is it?

‘I don’t-‘, I don’t know how to say this, ‘I’m not, I’m not good enough, don’t you understand?’, it almost sounds like a plea, like I’m asking him to confirm what I know, because it can’t be a lie, I can’t be wrong, can I?

But Dream just shakes his head, ‘You are what you make yourself. And you made yourself a Queen, until you forgot that.’ From inside his cloak, he pulls out a leather pouch that I know is filled with sand. He casts the sand around himself, disappearing in its golden swirl without another word.

‘What?’, I say to the empty air, properly angry now. That’s what he had for me? Complaints and laments and nothing else?

Anger is more than I felt in months, and it brings with it many more things. Indignance- at Dream- how dare he, like he understands how it is, coming in here and judging me (but I guess he didn’t, really); frustration and rage at the universe- why did I have to suffer, and if I did, why am I not allowed to just be, in grief, or despair, or whatever--

But I am, of course. I can just give into despair, like Dream said. He had zero kind words for me, zero sympathy, zero encouragement, he gave me nothing, so why not?

But that’s not true, is it? Instead of those human things, he did give me what he can give- dreams. For myself, and my people, and my kingdom- he has always given me that.

After the storm of rage comes the quiet of contemplation, and it is sparkling in clarity I scarcely hoped for. I said what happened to me did not define me. But maybe it did. It gave me the most brutal scars, but it also made me into this woman who can choose to heal- not by locking it all away, but by looking it into its eyes and defying it. She is strong enough.

So it takes days, and much silently raging conflict, and thinking, and making peace with things, but then, I open my doors, let in light and air, and I am the Queen once more. I go to the Dreaming that night, after so long. At his palace, the Dream Lord is walking down the hallway, and seeing me, he stops in his tracks.

‘I choose you.’, I say simply. Slowly, his mouth curves up in a smile, eyes sparkling, and at this moment, I feel something solidifying between us. I can’t name it, but it is born of us both seeing our purposes reflected in each other. It is a bond, and it is strong.

___________________________

Things are once again as they were, but also not, because for my queendom, I feel the purpose more strongly, and in my visits to the Dreaming, I feel freer. I am lighter with some frozen thing melted and evaporated from within me after those dark months, and it shows in the added spring in my steps, the sound of my voice and my laughter. I could allow none of this to be as unrestrained as I do but for that bond I can’t name- it still feel it simmer, with the realm and with Dream (they are one and the same, I suppose). It makes me feel like I belong here. Maybe it’s a delusion, a lie I tell myself, and the only thing that’s changed is my ability to allow myself to at least nurse the idea.

Today, I am in Dream’s throne room again, trying to convince him to leave his book, or register, or whatever that is he is poring through, and come on a walk with me.

‘You work too much.’, I tell him, ‘You never stop thinking about the realm for a moment. You just need to relax sometimes.’

‘Proper monarchs are busy.’, he turns a page, ‘You should know.’

‘I still relax- I’m relaxing right now!’

‘Are you.’, he looks up, smile slightly mocking at my hands on my waist and raised voice.

I shake my head, ‘You know what I mean. I’m asleep- which you don’t even do- and I’m visiting you. Maybe you’d notice if you took your nose out of that dusty, old thing long enough!’

‘You seem to have no regard’, he closes the volume and sets it aside, ‘for kingly duties. Or the King himself, I might add.’

His words are not angry. A smile plays on his lips, little and teasing. I love that smile- the thought sneaks in.

‘Maybe it’s because you’re always on these stairs and never on your actual throne.’, I tease right back, grabbing on whatever comes to mind, ‘Maybe if you sat on your throne, I’d show you your kingly regard.’

‘Oh? How?’

‘Hard to say now- I suppose we’ll both find out when you really do it.’

‘Let us find out, then.’, he stands, and starts walking up the stairs.

I’m bemused- I didn’t think he would do it right now. But Dream is not one to let questions float, and I’m not entirely sure he always sees or understands jokes the same way I do. He would want to find out.

Dream doesn’t need his throne. The very first time I saw him I was barely seven, and before he uttered a word, I knew he was a King- he exudes that power, that regal dignity. But as he settles on the throne and looks at me expectantly, I am in a fix. I promised a show of regard, and I must deliver, whatever that means.

I search for inspiration. The first thing I decide is I am too far away down here- I can’t even see his face properly. So I walk up the stairs, keeping my eyes on Dream. If his expression hints going nearer is disrespectful, I will stop. But he is stoic, waiting for me. Then I'm at the end, the last step becoming the platform for his throne, and on just the one below, I kneel. These steps are narrow, my body almost touches Dream's knees.

I knelt before I ever consciously decided to. This close to him, his seat of power, I can feel it- the Endlessness of him, the enormity. Kneeling to it came naturally. But I'm still not sure what I'm doing at all. Then I think of something- a gesture I saw offered to my father long ago in his court.

Dream’s hands are on his lap, and I pull one of them between mine. 'Lord Morpheus,’, I say, slow and deliberate, bowing my head, 'Dream of the Endless, Your Majesty. You are the uncontested sovereign of this realm, a just King, and wise. You are worthy of the highest regard, and such do I offer you as a privileged and humbled guest in this kingdom.'

I press my lips on his hand, kissing it softly. Then I look up. Dream has leaned in, watching me.

His face just above mine, I can see every detail of it, and Dream- he has always been beautiful, but maybe I forgot because how did it not take my breath away every second as it does now? The windows are behind the throne, and in the pool of colored light and shadows, his pale, sharp face glows like moonshine. His eyes are fixed on mine, and this close, I can see flecks and streaks of silver in the deep pools of blue, and faint rings of amber around the dark pupils glinting like stars. The mass of black hair framing his forehead makes the stark slopes of his cheeks more striking. I can hear him breathe, I can feel the warmth of his hand- still between my palms- seeping into me, and as my eyes fall onto his slightly parted lips, strangely, I can hear my heart beating in my own ears.

Slowly, Dream places the tips of the fingers of his other hand on my cheek, thumb on my chin.

‘Perhaps I should sit on my throne more often’, he murmurs, not taking his eyes off my face, ‘if you are to be so obliging.’

I open my mouth, but no sound comes out. I-I want- what? I don’t have words for these things that I never felt before. I want- want to be closer to him- but that’s not possible, that doesn’t make any sense, I’m already so close. My lips still tingle from their touch on his skin, and his voice, it’s still making soundless echoes within me, making me feel- what?

Bewildered, I let go of Dream’s hand and try to take steps back, forgetting I’m on a staircase, and I almost stumble down. With a quick and gliding grace that seems impossible, Dream reaches out and holds me by my arm, stopping my fall. The pull almost makes me lose my balance, and for the smallest fraction of a moment, I consider giving into the imbalance because then I’d be falling onto Dream’s body, crumpled on his lap, between his arms, and that, that is…

Insane. Senseless. What is happening? What is happening to me?

‘I-‘, I can’t quite catch my breath, ‘I’ll go. You can work. I’ll, I’ll see you later.’

I almost fly down the stairs, and as I will myself to leave the Dreaming, I can feel Dream’s eyes still on my back, intent, watching.

________________________________

The confusion is never entirely cleared, but settles into a thing, alive, always there, every time I see him, and then, even when I don’t. We talk, and sometimes now I lose the thread- distracted by how his hair falls on his face, lips move as he explains something, thick-lashed eyes flicker in response to what I tell him. Like always, he wears his long, dark cloak. Underneath- sometimes he is wearing simple clothes but sometimes he is wearing nothing. The cloak still covers his body then, but as he moves, I see flashes of his pale limbs, sliver of his throat, piece of his chest. All of it looks exquisitely defined in a way that hurts me- it hurts, and it is perplexing. A yearning has started to throb, constant- to be closer, to touch, to- I can’t think beyond that, I don’t know how to. I sit and stand and walk with him, near, but it’s not enough, it’s never enough.

If Dream notices any change, he does not comment on it. But when I’ve let the conversation evaporate, trying not to lose myself in his eyes, he doesn’t look away. Lightly he touches me on my arm, my shoulder, my waist as we move. It feels natural rather than deliberately thought out- but this is not what he always allowed himself before. A few times, his eyes follow mine when I’m looking at his body, and he smiles. Or smirks. I’m not sure. But afterwards, he looks speculative, sometimes becoming quiet and reserved for a time.

I don’t know what to do with any of it, so I try to ignore it. It makes me restless, but in a strange way, more alive. That yearning to be close- it finds non-physical ways to express itself and I discover myself speaking more openly to Dream- letting him see me as I am, speaking truths, agreeing with him when he doesn’t expect me to, challenging him even when he doesn’t like it. And Dream, he never has pretended to be other than he is- he is so assured in his ways. But now, rarely but still there, I see traces of things underneath- doubts and confusions and sometimes desolation. I don’t know if he lets me see them or I have become better at reading them within him, but either way, it makes me feel more intimate with him. And yet the yearning is never doused.

Then it gets infinitely worse, because for a time, I don’t see him at all.

It happens like this. He has been cross and moody about something lately, and he would not tell me about it. That is completely valid. I would not share every single thing about the inner goings-on of my queendom with him either- there are things I don’t want his opinion on, things that I am still processing, things I am not too proud of so I’d rather he didn’t know. Same things might apply to him. I understand this, but it makes me irrationally irritated. Then, that day, I’m in the Dreaming’s library when I hear him talk to Lucien.

I still visit the section where books about my kingdom and councilmen are, and I’ve just got what I need and managed to send Sir Woodby away when I hear Dream. Lucien has misplaced a book, let it be stolen or something, and Dream is not happy.

Lucien hangs her head. It is clear she has beaten herself up about it enough without Dream having to berate her. ‘I will get it back, my Lord.’, she says.

‘And what if you cannot?’

She has no answer, and Dream’s voice is cold, ‘It will be another show of severe incompetency, and perhaps I should expect it this time unlike-‘

Then, Dream notices me for the first time, half-hidden behind a shelf. As I walk out in full view, he looks embarrassed for a second, but in the next his face is stony and set.

‘What is this?’, I ask, and without pausing for a moment he answers, ‘Not your business.’

I’m not so much hurt as I am angry. ‘Oh, yes, you are ‘disciplining your employee’ or whatever, and that would not be my business, except Lucien is my friend, as she is yours. A mere lost book justifies you speaking to her like that?’

‘Excuse me.’, Lucien says politely, and retreats, the situation getting increasingly difficult for her to participate in.

Dream’s eyes burn. ‘You would teach me how to speak to my own subject, would you?’

‘Again, subject, yes, but she is also your friend! Why can’t you admit that? You’re angry about other things, probably, and taking it out on her. You know she is not incompetent at all!’

‘Ah, yes. Your ideas about friendship are trustworthy indeed.’

He is referring to all the times I tried to call him my friend when he said he wasn’t. A hot flash of pain rips through me.

‘I guess I’m wrong to be here right now, then.’ He doesn’t stop me as I turn around and will myself to leave.

We’ve had small arguments before. Mostly those were about things that don’t have singular right/wrong resolutions. But this time he was wrong, and he was unkind to me as well as Lucien. I know this, so the increasing urge to just forget everything and go see him as days go by is as annoying as it is embarrassing. But I have discovered a new sensation- it is the one of missing someone- him- with my complete and whole being. I did not feel this way before, and, like with so many things lately, I don’t know what to do with it.

I go about my duties as the Queen- I join meetings, draw up plans, make decisions, appear in front of people, and when I sleep, I only sleep. But the thought of Dream never completely leaves me. It is disruptive, it makes me go through too many conflicting emotions in too short spans of time, and when two months later one day, I snap at my sweetest maid for no reason, I collapse on the couch in my sitting room, head in hands. I have done the exact thing for which I got angry with Dream, unable to help myself at all.

I mutter a ‘sorry’ to the maid, who could probably handle a rebuke from the Queen with ease but is baffled with an apology, and tell her to go away. I’m taking deep breaths, trying to find some semblance of perspective when someone clears their throat. I look up, and my jaw drops.

‘Lucien?!’, I stand up, ‘How are you here?’

‘Quite a long walk.’, she informs me, ‘And it was not easy sneaking by your guards. I suppose that should reassure you.’

I doubt she really 'walked' here from the Dreaming, but the details are not relevant. ‘Can I offer you anything?’ I ask, ‘A drink?’

I’ve always been used to Dream's presence one way or another- whenever or wherever I’ve met him, it has always felt like the way of things. But somehow I’m unsure of how to deal with Lucien being here in the waking world.

‘Thank you, but no.’, she says, ‘I will not be here long. I came to tell you that Lord Morpheus has expressed regret to me for behaving as he did that day. He was very sincere.’

This makes me feel a definitive kind of peace. ‘I’m glad. Did he send you?’

‘Not exactly’, Lucien hesitates, and the crushing disappointment I feel is truly mortifying.

‘Oh.’, I say, trying to swallow it. ‘That’s fine. I appreciate you coming here and informing me anyway. Thank you.’

‘I mean, he didn’t tell me to do it in so many words, he can be remarkably vague when he wants to. But- well. You know him.’

I stare. If I’m understanding this right, Lucien is telling me Dream would like me to know he’s done the right thing so that I’d go back to visiting him, but he is too stubborn to admit it.

‘Well,’, I tell Lucien, ‘He knows me too. So if there’s something he wants me to know, tell him to come and say it to me.’

‘Oh, dear.’, Lucien mutters, looking quite distressed, and I feel bad for her. I don’t mean to harass her with problems between Morpheus and I. But I can’t just go back to visiting the Dreaming, not yet.

‘Did you find the book?’, I ask her.

‘No.’, she admits, ‘But the Lord says it’s okay. I will appear again, in some way.’

‘It will? That makes his behavior with you even worse!’

Seeing me get indignant on behalf of her, Lucien smiles, her eyes kind. ‘Thank you for defending me.’, she says, ‘And calling me your friend. I am honored.’

‘Oh’, I wave my hand, embarrassed. ‘You know you are. I’d never be able to navigate that library without your help.’

She watches me, not saying anything, and I sense a regret in her. She has never been quite comfortable with me getting close to Dream. It’s because she still doesn’t completely trust me not to destroy the Dreaming one day, and she never completely will. She is too loyal to the realm for that. We could’ve been better friends without this between us. But sometimes, things are what things are.

Whatever hint or nudge Lucien provides Dream I don’t know, but it must have worked because tonight, he is here.

I find him in my sitting room, admiring a painting on the wall. He turns around hearing me enter- I was passing through to my bedchamber.

Seeing him feels like breathing. I don’t know how else to put it. It’s like I was constantly trying to catch my breath the past two months, never quite succeeding, and now that he is here, I have, finally. It's a disorienting kind of relief.

‘Lucien tells me she saw you.’, Dream comes to stand in front of me.

‘Yes. She told me you two are in good terms again. I’m glad.’

‘Yes.’, he sighs, ‘I was not right in treating her with words so sharp… and the same is true for you.’, He meets my eyes, ‘I did not mean to offend you.’

‘You did, though.’, I point out, and faintly, he smiles.

‘Then I must offer an apology.’

‘Well, if you must…’, despite myself, my returning smile is wide. I’ve just missed him so much.

Quietly, we stand before each other, my acceptance of his apology understood without me having to vocalize it. The air is flickering orange-gold with candlelight, and Dream’s face in the soft glow makes me want to touch it very badly.

‘How have you been?’, I ask, trying to distract myself.

‘Long days.’

I raise my brows, ‘Because you missed me?’

‘Perhaps.’, he’s studying the carpet as if the pattern fascinates him.

‘Perhaps?’

‘Yes.’, he sighs, bringing his eyes back to me, ‘I missed your presence in the Dreaming.’ He steps back. ‘Well, I take it you will resume your visits?’

I nod, and he starts reaching for his sand pouch. ‘Good. Now I should be-‘

‘Don’t go yet.’, I interrupt him. ‘I’m at your palace so often, you are rarely at mine. Now that you are here, I would like you to see it. If you can stay, please do. I’ll show you around.’

He considers this. ‘Fine.’ He agrees eventually.

‘Okay, okay, wait here. I’ll change, won’t take a minute.’ I'm a little too happy, it’s making me speak fast.

Dream eyes me, saying nothing. When I’m in the Dreaming, I assume regular day clothes for myself, but now I’m in my sleeping clothes. They’re thin and don’t cover as much of me. Which wasn’t something that even occurred to me until now, but seeing him quietly take me in, a hot flush starts creeping up on my skin. It’s bothersome, and it’s baffling.

I leave quickly. I change in my dressing room and take deep breaths to calm myself. I’m a Queen, for goodness’ sake. It won’t do to start acting like a foolish child, however happy I am.

Dream is waiting for me where I left him. I pick up the biggest single candle holder in the room. ‘Let’s…’ My feet stop before he can follow me. ‘No. Wait. Will everyone be able to see you? I’m assuming most of the palace is asleep, but still- if we meet anyone?’

‘I can veil myself from others if you prefer so.’, he answers, and I am relieved.

‘Yes, please do. Thank you. Just, the Queen out of her quarters with an unknown man at this hour… it would be a grave scandal. My people, even close ones, would care even if I would not, and some are just waiting to use anything they can against me.’

As I lead Morpheus down the hallway, pointing to various halls and rooms and courtyards along the way, he asks, ‘Is such your custom? You may not choose men?’

‘I may choose a man’, I say, paying only half-attention, trying to plan our route in a way that will let him see the most of the palace in the least amount of time. ‘whom I must marry before allowing him anywhere near me at improper hours.’

We are in my throne room. It is big and empty, the throne creeping in the dark like a crouching animal. I gesture with my hand. ‘No staircase here’, I joke. ‘But this suffices for me.’

Dream looks around, taking it in. ‘Fitting.’, he says. Then he looks at me. ‘Your previous experience was terrible and cannot be disregarded. But there must also be good men. You could take a husband again if you wished.’

I stare. He’s still thinking about this while I wasn’t- not just now and honestly, not ever. ‘I don’t wish to.’, I tell Dream.

‘No?’, his gaze is locked with mine, eyes hooded in half-darkness.

‘No.’, I am firm in my answer, ‘I have enough,’ This is the truth. Even setting aside the fact a suitor would be hard to come by- I'm too old, a widow, a witch- it has never occurred to me to look for a man’s company or commitment. In my life, I have my queendom. My people. And Dream. I have enough.

‘You don’t have a Queen.’, I point out, and Dream looks away.

‘No.’, he murmurs, and is then quiet. There were women he loved long and mourned long- this is as much as I know. In the absence of his enthusiasm in such conversation, I never probed much.

‘Come.’, I tell him, ‘Enough of the palace. What I really want to show you is outside.’

The garden is awash in moonlight, and I leave the candle behind. This is where I wanted to bring Dream when I asked him to stay. My palace may be magnificent, but it came to me as is- everything designed and decorated by people I never knew or knew and hated. This garden, on the other hand, was born in my mind.

‘They would sometimes let me go out in the garden when I was a child’, I explain to Dream. ‘But it had high walls around, and within it, high hedges. Also, everything was perfect- every leaf patterned, every branch in line, every blade of grass aligning… I never liked it much. It never felt like I was really outside.’

In my garden, I had everything made, built, and planted the opposite of that. A gate exists, but once we’re inside, it’s more like a self-grown forest. There are briars instead of stone walls, streams instead of fountains, wildflowers instead of flowerbeds. The winding narrow paths don’t lead anywhere, and clearings come to one unexpectedly. It is one of the first things I demanded when I became Queen- a place to get away from things when I wanted to (and it was often). And this is what I designed for that.

‘It is no Fiddler’s Green, obviously.’, I tell Dream, feeling oddly vulnerable and defensive, ‘But I still wanted to show you. I mean, of course, you’ve seen everything there is to see, so not that you’d be impressed with this, I understand that-‘, I’m looking at him instead of the path, trying to see his expression, and I stumble on a fallen branch.

‘Careful.’, Dream says, soft and low, and then I feel him taking my hand.

Earlier, when I teased him about missing me, he was not direct with his response. But this- the firm hold of his hand on mine, not released as we walk together- gives him away. He has missed me, and he is glad to be here with me now- his touch conveys and confirms this truth. With my hand secure in his, I feel an odd kind of safety- a protected comfort that defies explanation, and I also feel quite giddy- if I ever were drunk, surely this is what it would be like?

Fingers intertwined with mine, Dream lets me eventually lead us to a large flat rock near a stream. Sharp silver moonlight pours onto the clearing, reflects off the singing, running water of the stream. The odd bird coos, the odd insect buzzes, the odd animal scurries. All else is still, and quiet.

Dream sits down with me on the rock, and I hold onto his hand a little tighter without meaning to- I’m afraid he’ll let go. But he won’t, and slowly I relax as I realize this, letting our joined hands loosely fall onto my lap.

‘You made a beautiful place.’, he says, and he would never lie to placate anyone, so I know he means it.

‘Well, I mean, I didn’t make it, I had people, brilliant-‘

‘You dreamed it.’, he says simply, and that is true, I suppose.

‘Thank you.’, I say, ‘It… it means much to me that you like it.’

He nods, accepting. ‘It is you.’, he says.

‘What is me?’

‘This garden.’

I don’t know if I completely understand him. I often forget, but this being- simply by definition of his existence he has such depth that is near unfathomable.

I don’t ask what he means. Instead, I say, ‘I have never really been in a forest in the waking world. No, I have once- when I was coming to this kingdom as a new bride. But the carriage was covered all around- imagine a man accidentally looking at the Queen, the horror- and I only heard it instead of seeing it.’, I breathe, ‘There are much taller trees, aren’t there? And sunlight falls in narrow slants on the moss-carpeted floor?’ I feel a little embarrassed, ‘That’s how I’ve seen it in my dreams anyway, really it might be different? If ever there were time, if I ever could, I would travel. My world has been so small.’

Dream is silent for a moment. Then he slightly repositions himself so he’s more facing me instead of the stream, and says, ‘There is a forest.’

I listen, mesmerized, as he speaks of that forest- dark, wild, deep, ancient trees gnarled and scaly like unknown monsters, animals that would hunt you before you ever hunted them, folks living in it who are not human, and in winter, it is winter for eleven months, white-blue frost slowly freezing and icing and cracking everything. This forest he talks of, and then other forests, and then deserts- as oceans but with sand- red and gold and blinding and scorching in the sun- and then mountains that touch skies and ensnare clouds and hold snow and spit fire, and in their bellies, they birth rubies, and sapphires, and emeralds…

I listen, and I see as I never have, as I never would. Lucien once called Morpheus ‘the Prince of Stories’ and it puzzled me, but I understand, I understand now. This he gives to me, stories- shaped and real, and through them, I travel, I see, I know. I don’t know how long he talks. I don’t know when the moon gets higher, night gets deeper, when my head falls onto his shoulder as he gently curves an arm around me, I don’t know when I close my eyes and drift away, still holding his hand onto my heart. I dream in my sleep- dreams not created or chosen by me but given to me by him. I can still see as he speaks of, I can be safe, and I don’t see him, but I know he is here, he is here with me. 

_________

Tag ask:  @emy635

[touchtranscendslanguage]

hello!! i’m a newcomer but i just wanted to say that your series is so friggen amazing <3 i fancy myself some self-care snakebois and anxiety-ridden driderbois. though roman might actually kill me and i’m terrified of him having the ability to make people fall out of love. what a horrifying thought kxjsjdheh??? anyway!!! i have some questions regarding magic because magic yay worldbuilding <3 my bad if some of these have been asked! as i said, i’m a newcomer aha;;

so if taking away a witches magic makes them no longer a witch, can an old enough witch just die on the spot, or are they biologically however old they were physically (like how the royal fam stopped at around 30) and begin aging at a rate normal for their species? if taking away a witches magic makes them no longer a witch, does giving someone magic make them a witch? and if so, are they then immortal or age slower than previously? are any species (that we know of so far) unable to naturally be witches, and what happens if they’re *given* magic without biologically being able to have it? can a person have TOO much magic? what species do we know of so far and are any of them/will any of them be relevant? i want virgil to be besties with the waitstaff again :((( (not a question but it needed to be said). was sleep messing with virgil’s circadian rhythm? probably not but i just wanted to confirm because he’s a vindictive little shit who totally would 👀

will sleep and virge be spider besties now?,,,,pls i need little weave-and-relieve sessions between the two where they just chill and rant n maybe do each others nails or share weaving tips :))) can virgil croquet or sew or knit or something? because he’d love, probably. it’s great for anxiety (probably, i’m so bad at it i wouldn’t know LOL)

i. am going to cut myself off here before it gets too long. have a good day! <3

- OnlyRoomForHope (would be unanon but i can’t be bothered logging in on right account lmaoo)

@onlyroomforhope

Thank you and welcome! I'm so happy to have you here in my own tiny corner of the fandom! Yeah, we love our self-care snake and anxious spider here. Also, wow, ya'll really latched onto that fact about Roman. As long as Virgil and Janus keep their protections up around him they'll be fine :)

A lot of good questions here and for the most part it looks like they haven't been answered before! This is exciting! *crackles knuckles* Let's dive in, shall we?

So if a witch loses their magic and therefore their immortality they don't just drop dead. Their body is still physically the age it was when they stopped aging, they just begin to age again. This applies to humans, fae are already immortal on their own their immortality just works a bit differently.

Giving someone magic does make them a witch. I think I've mentioned it before, but Remy wasn't born a witch, he got his magic from King Thomas. Gaining his own magic made him a witch and came with all of the perks of being one including immortality. Remy is indistinguishable from any other witch.

Thus far I've only put a lot of thought into humans and fae being witches, but I'd say most highly intelligent sentient species can have witches. Especially the humanoid or partially humanoid ones. So most monsters such as naga, driders, merepeople, centaurs, and vampires can all be witches. Dragons, kelpies, harpies, and sirens cannot.

it's also important to note that I said highly intelligent sentient species. That means beasts are not included. So there are no pheonix, unicorn, bear of bears, or bassilisk witches.

Could someone give a beast or non-witch monster witch magic? Yes. Chaos would happen.

No, a person couldn't have too much magic. Exibit A: Thomas. King Thomas has a ridiculous amount of magic. Should he have that much magic? Absolutely not. That shouldn't be allowed. But, hey, I didn't make the rules (yes I did) and it is what it is.

Now, if you're asking if a lot magic can have negative side effects then yes, it can potentially be overwhelming. If King Thomas got all of his magic at once it would have taken a serious toll on him and at one point he did aquire too much at once and it did take a toll. That was a the very beginning of Thomas's reign and he depended on Nico a lot to hide it. After an adjustment period he was fine, though. After that he learned to take magic gradually, one or two witches at a time with breaks in between.

Okay, so so far in the series we know of humans (obviously), fae, driders, and naga. We also know that fae are split into seelie and unseelie. Only humans and seelie are going to play major rolls in the series. As tempted as I am to play around with the many subcatagories of fae and the other species, I'm trying to keep this as simple as I can. We may see them play minor roles as in individual characters but that's it.

That being said, I am planning the brief appearance of a third major species.

Now, there are many minor species of monsters but those all defer to either the seelie or unseelie making fae a major species. Humans are also a major species. The third major species that is indepented of and can stand toe-to-toe with fae and humans is spirits. Spirits will barely appear in the series so I don't plan on doing a lot of wolrd building for them.

So all in all, only humans and fae will really be relevant.

I want Virgil to be friends with the staff again, too ;_;

Remy totally would mess with Virgil's sleep, however he was on Earth up until the day he was introduced to Virgil, so no, he didn't have anything to do with Virgil's sleeping problems.

Remy are Virgil are going to be besties! I am firmly team Those Two Getting Along. They are my babies and I love them, they must at least be friends. There will be classic sleep overs and they will get up to shananagins, so stay tuned for that.

Virgil can weave and sew. He's okay at it. he does it more for stress relief than to be good.

[angelsdevils]

Time Zone: Sequel

Warning: There are some SPOILERS Note: This story will only be on my Wattpad and AO3 which are usernames Aurora_Petals. If you see anyone claiming this plot as their own let me know. I do NOT own the characters. KoFi not mandatory but donations are appreciated!

Tag List: @omakeomuomu @thisbicc @galactict3a @6-022-10-23 @bontensbabygirl @mrskasukib @artemis1862 @oikawascutie

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Final |

Three years have passed since you have known Kazutora, constantly sending letters and receiving phone calls for him. It was no secret you were head over heels for him, which only proved your brother right. After his friend Chifuyu contacted you, there was an opportunity you couldn’t pass up. Leading you to go to Japan for the first time in a few weeks. 

“Hey, Tora~,” You said through the phone as you through the halls. 

“Hey, is now a good time? I hope I didn’t disturb your sleep.”

“Oh no, you didn’t. I always look forward to these calls, especially this one. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! ” You laughed softly and he couldn’t help but smile.

“Thanks, I wish we could spend it together…” 

“Well, I have a present for you?” 

“Really? Now I can’t wait to get it, ugh…”

“What’s wrong?”

“I have to cut my call short, my friends showed up at the wrong time. They are saying I have a visitor.”

“Oh, okay. Well, I will talk to you soon.”

“I am so sorry… I feel bad.”

“No don’t, who knows they may have a gift for you…” 

“Bye…” He laughed slightly and you hung up.

“Are you (Y/N)?” 

“You must be Chifuyu, it’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s no problem, I am glad you were able to squeeze this into your time. He doesn’t know you are here, does he?” Chifuyu asked and you shook your head.

“Nope, but you may get scolded.” 

“It will all be good once he sees you. He speaks really highly of you.” 

“Stop that’s gonna make me blush.” Chifuyu went in first and Kazutora was glaring at him slightly.

“What is with the look? Happy Birthday to you.”

“I was on the phone with (Y/N) and had to cut it short.”

“My bad, I just wanted to see you.”

“It’s fine, thanks for visiting…”

“You must really like her…” 

“I do… she is absolutely amazing.” 

“Well, she is pretty cute…”

“What?” Kazutora looked at Chifuyu confused.

“What? She is cute…”

“How do you know, there is no possible way you would have known…”

“ANYWAY, I have a present for you…” 

“Hey, don’t ignore my question.” Chifuyu got up and opened the door, and you walked in looking at Kazutora. His mouth dropped open and felt his cheeks heat up.

“(Y/N)… you are here…” 

“To see you silly. Suprise~ I am here in the flesh… thanks to Chifuyu…” You and Chifuyu both looked at Kazutora who hadn’t said anything. You both waved your hands in front of him before you guys looked at each other. 

“I think we broke him.” 

“Yeah… and it may get worse.”

“Why…” 

“I was able to contact his parole officers and his support group worker to arrange for us to spend some time with him and have cake since he was on good standing.”

“Wow, they wouldn’t even let me…”

“Well, I have also been kinda acting as his support for when he needs someone. Since we have known each other for a few years now. So she allowed it.” 

“Ahh, makes sense.” You both went back to Kazutora who was just staring off into space. You tapped on the glass, and he jumped slightly before meeting your eyes. 

“You are really here?” 

“Yes, I am…” Kazutora had the purest smile on his face, and you flashed him one back. Suddenly an officer came in and put Kazutora in handcuffs.

“What?”

“We will see you outside in the courtyard…”

“I don’t understand~” He was being walked away and you waved before another officer guided you guys to a secure area where Kazutora couldn’t escape, but you and Chifuyu were safe. You both sat on the bench and you opened your bag to grab some homemade food you made. Kazutora eventually came up and his handcuffs were removed.

“Two hours, that’s it.” He said before leaving the three of you alone.

“How did you get it like this?”

“Some talking, hug?” You opened your arms after standing and he quickly got up and hugged you tightly. He buried his face into your neck and you rocked the both of you gently.

“This is so sickeningly sweet and I wanna puke,” Chifuyu said, you and Kazutora flicked him off and he held his hands up. 

“Chifuyu?”

“Yeah, Kazutora?”

“Thank you so much…” He mumbled after reluctantly pulling away from you. You squeezed his shoulders and smiled as Chifuyu waved it off.

“Well, after you provided me her full name, state and country. It wasn’t hard to find her. I wanted to personally thank her as well, and then we started talking and came up with this plan. I just helped her get here.”

“Still, I- am so happy we finally get to meet~” 

“Well, let’s eat… we only have 2 hours after all.” You removed the lids and he smiled handing each of them a bowl with silverware. The three of you conversed and ate happily. Kazutora couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, as you spoke or laughed. 

“You are so beautiful. I think I love you…” Kazutora randomly said after Chifuyu told a story about Baji, whom you knew a lot about by now.

“I am sorry what?” Chifuyu said, and your face heated up and you felt like your body was gonna catch fire.

“What? Oh no. I said that out loud didn’t I?” Kazutora slightly panicked as he met your eyes and you cleared your throat.

“(Y/N), I am so sorry… I don’t know-”

“As I told you before, I like you too.” You gave him a gentle smile and he relaxed a bit.

“No, I- actually think I love you… I understand if it hasn’t reached that point yet. Sorry… forget I said anything.” He quickly said and you reached over and stroke his cheek.

“Let’s not make Chifuyu here feel like he is third-wheeling, we can discuss this later.” 

“Okay…”

“Thank god, I don’t think I could handle you two making out…” 

“Hey!” You and Kazutora shot him a glare and he smirked. It soon came time for you and Chifuyu to leave, he waved to Kazutora and you.

“I have to go back to the pet shop, did you need a ride (Y/N)?”

“No it’s fine, I got it. Thanks, text me!”

“I will bye… I will see you later Kazutora~” Kazutora waved before looking at you. 

“Officer? Five more minutes, please? Promise it to be quick.” 

“Sure~” He left you two alone and you looked at Kazutora. He was finally alone with you even if it was only for a few minutes.

“I love you too Kazutora, we can’t date right now.”

“I know, it would be too difficult plus you have to go back to America. I really do love you though.” He said, and you stroked his cheek before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips and he sighed softly. His heart was filled with warmth and happiness. Something he got from you every time he talked to you. The kiss was gentle and sweet and he wrapped his arms around you. You both completely forgot you were in the visitor center in a juvenile jail. You eventually pulled away, and he smiled leaning his forehead against yours.

“Maybe when you officially get out we could work something out. So it’s easier for the two of us.”

“Alright, you will still write me and answer my calls right?”

“Of course, nothing will change…” 

“Good.”

“Okay, you two. I have to take him back to his cell.” The officer came in after about 10 minutes.

“Thank you, for giving us extra time. Kazutora, I love you…”

“I love you too, thank you for visiting me, and Japan. I know it wasn’t cheap, I promise to make it up to you.”

“No need, I hope you had a great birthday!”

“I did thanks to you and Chifuyu. Bye…” 

You walked out and held a hand to your chest with a wide smile. 

© [@angelsdevils] all rights reserved. none of my posts or stories should be modified, reposted, etc. I do not own the character or the fanart, but I own the plots of these stories. All fanart goes to their appropriate owners.

[serena-hart-09]

"Remember Me"

A/N: Heyo! So it seems that my brain started to work today and I finally completed the draft! ✨✨✨✨

Anyways, I know this is quite smaller than I what usually write....

Also, any suggestions or asks are always welcome! 💖💖💖💖💕💕✨✨

(Also, take care of yourselves!)

TW: Implied/Mentions of vomiting ; Implied Murder ; Major-Character Death ; If have missed any please do tell me!

Others: Lucifer x F!OC (Meera) ; a little fluff.

Previous

Next

Chapter 1

“GAH!”

The demon of pride wakes up with a scream looking around the room.

There was only him and the pitch darkness surrounding him.

And of course, the silence.

“….” The demon takes a moment to calm his racing heart down, thinking about the events that had transpired.

M.L.

Prorok’s death….

Diavolo…..

Him dying……

He gets up and runs for the bathroom to wash his face, to somehow calm down the storm inside his head.

‘It’s alright. You’ll get used to it’

A voice in his head tells him.

……Ah….. It’s M.L……

“Tch” Lucifer scowls away from the mirror.

‘Hey now, I was trying to comfort you.’

“…..So….. I am alive…..?”

‘Yup.’

Ignoring the voice, he continues to think aloud, “……What day is this……?”

‘….The same day you “died”.’

…..

“I beg your pardon?”

How the hell is he going to change his fate in just one goddamn day?!

‘Hey, you never know.’

Tch.

This is going to be a hassle….

…..

…

“?” the demon looks over the nightstand where his D.D.D. gives out a sound of its presence, to inform him of message. Lucifer sighs and checks the device.

It’s 3:04 am.

Underneath the clock in screen, the sender’s name was visible.

“Meera?” why was she awake so late in the night? Shaking his head, he reads the message:

Meera: Hey you awake?

Meera: Sorry, if I am disturbing you……

Meera: I……. I just… missed you is all…

Huh? What happened to her-

‘Hey…. That didn’t happen the last time… did it?’

!!

Yes….. This didn’t happen…. But, “It could still be a useless different moment as well…” As much he didn’t want say something like that about the human, he right now had more impending matters to handle.

‘Every moment is precious, Lucifer. Even a slightest change, can be a small light in a crevice or…….a signal of the inevitable.’ M.L. speaks to him solemnly.

“Talking with experience?”

‘Reply to her.’

“…”

Lucifer: No, you didn’t. I assure you; I was awake myself.

The reply comes faster than he anticipates:

Meera: I… see…..

Meera: ……

Meera: Are working late again?

Meera: *Doom Demoji*

The demon smiles to himself, as he also can hear the voice inside him chuckle.

Lucifer: What if I am?

Lucifer: Are you going to, in your words, “Drag my ass back to bed?” :)

Meera: Holy shit-

Meera: Lucifer using a smiley! I need to capture this moment forever!

Meera: *clicks a screenshot*

Meera: And yes, I would. I would lovingly drag your ass back bed.

Meera: And if you try to escape?

Meera: Then I will stick to you like a sloth.

Lucifer: Oh?

Lucifer: Please do try.

Lucifer: :)

Meera: …..

Meera: On second thought,

Meera: I would give you tea.

Meera: and put a drop of sleeping potion.

Lucifer: You do know that you are talking to the very person, you intend to use that plan upon, yes?

Meera: ….

Meera: …..

Meera: Ahahahahahahha-

Lucifer: …..Really now?

Lucifer: Anyways, are you alright?

Lucifer: What is keeping you awake?

Meera: …..

Meera: Hey……

Lucifer: ?

Meera: How did it feel when you killed someone for the first time…..?

…..

Lucifer double checks the message to make sure eyes are not deceiving him.

Lucifer: What do you mean?

Meera: You know what? Forget, I ever said that.

Lucifer: No, Meera.

Lucifer: What did you mean by that?

“Do you think that…….”

‘She is the one who killed Prorok?’ He finishes with an amused hum.

“…..But it’s highly unlikely. She’s a human. He’s a prophet and a demon. It can’t be….”

‘Did you check her background? Any links to supernatural entities?’

“Other than Lilith’s faint lineage. No.” the demon looks at the device’s screen to find a reply.

Meera: ……

Meera: What if I said…….

Meera: I did it for you?

What?

‘What? Is she like obsessed with you or something?’

This doesn’t makes any sense…. Meera, from the beginning hated his guts. It is recently that they had a mutual friendship between them…. Not to mention, Meera loves Simeon. So….

‘It’s impossible?’

The demon nods in the empty room.

Meera: What if I said….. I knew something that no one knows?

Meera: Or something, like, I know what is going to happen?

“…….”

‘…’

Lucifer closes his eyes for a moment, and takes a deep breath.

Lucifer: …..Did you kill Prorok?

Meera: ……

Lucifer: May I take that as a yes?

Meera: ….. Yes.

“How-”

‘Anything is possible, buddy.’

Furiously shaking his head, he types:

Lucifer: Come to my room, now.

“So, we know who, killed Prorok. But I still don’t what Prorok’s Prophecy was.”

‘You suspect that, Diavolo killed you due a prophecy?’

“That is very likely.”

‘Elaborate.’

“The Old Demon King was very well acquainted with him. All of his prophecies were true, almost.”

‘Almost?’

“Yes, only one prophecy was never fulfilled.”

‘Do you know…?’

“No. It is confidential.”

‘Anyways-’

A heavy knock resounds in the void-like silence of the room.

“…Come in.”

  The door opens slowly to reveal a figure covered in blood, from head to toe. It’s head low, meekly trying to hide itself.

A second look made Lucifer, paralyze in realization, as the figure lifts its head to look at him.

It was Meera.

Lucifer doesn’t know why or when, but he hugged her tightly, without caring about the blood.

“Why?” he asks.

“I said so, didn’t I?” her small voice answers.

“But still-”

“Here.” The human hands him a crumpled old document.

“….?”

“It’s the prophecy.”

“…” he looks at her in horror.

“I don’t care, if you kill me, or you can do what you think is best.”

Lucifer steps back a little to look at her. The clothes that she wore on their date, last Friday were now covered in blood. Her eyes, that shone whenever she would talk, now empty and soulless.

‘….’

“But still, why did you do it?” he sighs, in a feeble attempt to regain his composure.

“……..”

“Meera…….”

“…..Burn that thing.”

“Huh?”

“The Prophecy. Burn it.”

“…. Why may I ask?”

“Should I do it for you then?”

“Answer my question first, Meera.” He growls at her, agitated.

Meera’s black eyes look at him for a moment and then she sighs looking down, at her hands. “……”

“…..Meera?”

Suddenly, Meera pulls out a bloodied silver dagger from her coat, she looks at the demon with a sad smile, “I am sorry, but I couldn’t keep my promise…….. But this may save you, so live….. alright?”

Lucifer looks at her in shock, and runs at her to grab the dagger……

‘…….Let me….’

Suddenly, reality broke apart like a glass………

Everything, Meera, himself, the room, the trees outside, the moon in the sky, the sky itself….

Everything was submerged in the darkness…….

?????????

??????

????

???

??

?

“GUh!”

…….

The demon of pride wakes up with a scream looking around the room.

There was only him and the pitch darkness surrounding him.

And of course, the silence.

“….” The demon takes a moment to calm his racing heart down, thinking about the events that had transpired.

…..

“Ok……… BUT WHAT IN NAME OF DEVIL-”

‘Part of my powers.’

“!”

‘*Sigh* That girl was about to kill herself. So, I had to.’

“……..”

‘Look I know what you are thinking but there is a limit to how much I can use this power too.’

“….Oh?”

‘I can only use it 7 times, minus 1 for now.’

“…..Why did you…”

‘I don’t know why…. But I feel like Meera, that girl………’

“She knows why did Diavolo killed me the first time? Because her having the Prophecy itself was alarm-” the demon stops mid-sentence. “Wait, we have to go to Meera! NOW!”

Lucifer grabs a red stone from the nightstand and breaks it, red waves of magic revolve around him as his attire changes from his nightclothes to his classic look. He quietly flies down the stairs and sends his small minions, the Little Ds to look for Meera in the House.

He looks at his watch, if he is correct, all of the events happened in 1 and half hours at minimum or 2 hours at maximum. He vomited in the bathroom for a lot of time, talked to M.L. for like 5 minutes at best? Then replied to Meera and talked to her for 20 minutes, then waited for her arrival and then all of the things that came after-

“What?”

The demon looks at his watch.

It’s 3:04 am.

The demon looks at his D.D.D. and opens the messaging app to confirm.

There were no new messages.

Meera hadn’t messaged him….

He reopened the app again and again.

“What… This Thing-”

“Lord Lucifer!”

A Little D of Lust comes at him, it looks at him knowing their master’s foul mood it quivers and speaks, “M-Miss, she is in…. her r-room sleeping.”

“What.”

At the speed of light Lucifer flies to Meera’s room not caring if he was making any sound or whatever.

Once at his location, he quietly opens the door and finds the human sleeping in her bed.

“……”

The demon dismisses everyone and goes back in his room.

“Just….. What the hell is happening?”

‘…..’

“Do you know anything?”

‘No…… It seems that we are in a much bigger pickle that we thought we were….’

“…..M.L.”

‘Hm?’

“What day is it?”

Maybe, the day is different that’s why?

….

‘It’s the same day, Lucifer.’

End Notes: I hope you like this chapter!😊

Please Do Not Repost without Permission! (Reblogs are welcome!)

All the characters mentioned above belong to Shall We Date?: Obey Me!, NTT Solmare

[cryptixani]

Heyo! I'd like a romantic Sonic matchup if you don't mind ^-^

 Name: Walela Rose!

Pronouns: She/they

Sexuality and preferences: Bisexual, and my big crushes are Shadow, Sonic and Knuckles (am major Shadow simp) but I’m cool with any match. If you’re focusing on my big 3, I mostly crush on modern and Boom Sonic, movie Knuckles and any freaking iteration of Shadow (except IDW, they did him so dirty ;--;) smaller crush on movie Sonic and Blaze, but again I’m good with any matchup so no pressure!

Personality: where do I freaking start. I am more or less a huge anxious shut in. I have pretty bad anxiety and am scared to be outside by myself. I am a little socially anxious and am awkward, whether I’m confident about it or not. Whenever I try to talk to someone new, I tend to open up with a joke or meme that they end up not understanding and the convo usually ends there. Otherwise, I tend to not talk around strangers. However, when I get close to someone, they can’t shut me up. I get clingy, really affectionate and maybe annoying idk. I tend to crack myself up with puns that everyone else facepalms over. Sometimes I overshare my thoughts. I can be loud when I get excited. My sleep schedule is fricked up lol and I am a bit chubby. I also have a lot of low iq moments lmao and I need a lot of reassurance to know somebody isn’t going to leave me or replace me with someone else. I like sharing the things I obsess about with the ones close to me. I’m an age regressor, but even when I’m not regressing I tend to act a bit like a kid. I’m also lazy af and I blush easily. (Sorry if this was super long) Likes and dislikes: I like singing and playing video games and drawing too! I don’t like pickles, or coffee, and I don’t like hard thunderstorms or people angry yelling at me bc those scare me a lot. I really like Kingdom Hearts and My Little Pony and, of course, the Sonic franchise! My favorite colors are pastels and black. Although I like fireworks, I have to plug my ears when watching them bc I’m a highly sensitive person and those big loud babies hurt my ears. I like childlike things, like those stupid pretend cash register toys.

Relationship type: Something intimate, someone who likes taking care of me but tries to help me grow as a person as well. A relationship where they'll just suddenly remind me that they love me (that makes me swoon) and say sweet things in my ear first thing in the morning (more swooning). Perhaps someone just a little bit possessive, like they get a little jealous or pull me close when they feel like there's competition nearby. Someone who likes to gently brush my hair and doesn't call me cringe if I write them a super cheesy love poem. Someone who will love my body regardless of its shape, but still encourage me to be healthy. And someone who will be understanding and caring when I regress.

NSFW: My top 3 kinks are yandere, DDLG (as in calling someone Daddy and they take on a dilf-like role) and praise kink. I'm a switch, but mostly submissive.

hello lovely, thank you for submitting! i hope you like your matchup!

i match you with...

knuckles the echidna

• this is honestly just a gut feeling but i think knuckles would be a really good match for you!!

• he would definitely help you come out of your shell a bit, at least if you're only around him, to help you overcome your social anxiety. even if it's just baby steps.

• definitely loves taking care of you, making sure you're okay in any given situation, keeping an eye on you when you're around others in case your social battery runs dry

• his love language is acts of service so i think he'd overall just enjoy having someone that lets him convey that

• i don't think he'd be too into pda or anything like that, i headcanon him as pretty reserved, but when it's just the two of you he loves to murmur his affections by your ear while he keeps you close

• won't get most of the memes you reference but will still appreciate it anyway <3 he will enjoy your silly jokes and puns though

• knuckles is very protective over what he loves and what he considers his so rest assured you are in very safe hands, not to mention he won't hesitate to assert himself as your s/o if anyone else tries anything funny

• enjoys your affectionate, clingy nature, would never find it annoying.

• honestly if you gave him a cheesey love poem, he'd be more flustered than anything. he's not used to receiving such affection so it takes him off guard!

hope you enjoyed your matchup!!

[seaottersandstrings]

something lgbt just happened to me (extreme emotional pain edition)

(ignore me I just need an internet void to scream in where she wont see it or read if you’re nosy and willing to be nice about it)

(also if anyone has any advice for how to not be so fucked up about the girl who is kinda your ex but not really (in the “never actually dated but we both had feelings and acted like it a lot” way) officially dating a new person for the first time since she shattered your heart into a million tiny pieces please dm me said advice this is 100% serious)

like we have all the same friends and it’s been over half a year so I feel weird talking to irl people about it. even I am surprised at how intensely the emotions punched me in the lungs when she told us she has a bf now. like cmon brain I knew we weren’t over this but I thought we were at least getting better. 

also there’s the added fun layer of “her own internalized biphobia and biphobic family members made it so our connection was always laced with shame and repression and suffering anyway.” and now she gets to celebrate this moment with friends and family and do boy talk with her mom and ask her parents for advice about this guy she’s known for a couple months and have an easy friends to lovers arc with him. while I was stuck listening to her family coo over how she should get back with her ex bf once he transferred to our college while she and I were literally sleeping in the same bed the night before. but bc I’m not a guy ofc nothing could possibly have been going on there. 

like you’re telling me I was in a years-long, will-they-won’t-they sufferfest where I was embarrassingly emotionally devoted to this person only for npc #3 to crawl out of the woodwork and get the instant stamp of approval for wanting to get to know her better and giving it the old college try? 

and to be clear I’m not blaming her she feels how she feels and obviously the bi/homophobia is a societal/community level issue. it just sucks so bad to fall so deeply in love with someone over such a long time and have those feelings be treated less seriously because of things we can’t control. like just on top of the regular heartbreak of it all. and believe me the regular heartbreak of it all is more than enough for my little eggshell heart to handle. 

and on a regular heartbreak level it also sucks because she’s a good person that I genuinely care about on a non-romantic level and still think very highly of. like our relationship wasn’t and still isn’t perfect but she’s one of the best people in my life and an objectively decent human being. so it’s not like I can even rationalize to myself “well it was toxic” (actually maybe the dynamic was but like SHE wasn’t a toxic person y’know) or “she treated me badly” or “she sucks so I’m better off now anyway.” like no she’s wonderful and her new bf is very lucky life just sucks sometimes. 

did I mention she and I are still best friends and even though we live in different cities now which helps I still have to pretend to be totally 100% excited about this for the sake of being a good bestie? like god I love being a lesbian if I had to do life all over again and got a choice I would choose to be queer every single goddamn time. but this is the most painful shit I’ve ever felt in my life and that’s a pretty high bar at this point. especially since this is technically not my first heartbreak but it’s my first one since realizing I’m a lesbian and not bi and started having a lot of The Piercing Loneliness of Breaking Every Societal Expectation feelings about it. like I think my brain was unintentionally pulling a “maybe I’ll turn out normal-passing” on itself (which is total bullshit) for a while there. and even though I know that was bullshit coming to terms with being a lesbian was so much harder for me than coming to terms with being queer at all and everything related to it has just felt so much more intense since. 

and on some level I’m also jealous bc she got out and can have a relationship she can celebrate and talk about with her family without fear and I can never have that. like bi people obviously go through so much shit and have a hard time getting both straight and gay people to take them seriously and as someone who lived that (in the “other people treated me like I was bi bc we all thought I was” sense) and thought that was who I was for 7 years I would never want to diminish that but oh my god being on the other side now I can understand how easy it is to let yourself get bitter. And I never want to be that person but at the same time speaking purely of my own experience it didn’t take me so long (2+ years) to figure out I was a lesbian because I just didn’t know like at some point deep down I knew especially near the end of my questioning era but I kept asking myself “well are you SURE?” because didn’t want to face the loneliness of it. Of closing the door on the last possible chance I had for my family and I to bond over something in a normal way for once. And coming out again was incredibly freeing but I also had to be willing to break my own heart to do it and the compounding heartbreak is just so much. 

anyway if anyone is reading this I love you and I hope you’re having a better day than me. happy new year. 

[invisiblemonstrosity]

normalize kissing your best friend cause you are so deliriously happy you cannot contain it within just yourself

[soft-boi-eli]

Hello Hello!

I just wanted to say I love your fics!

ALSO!

Could I request a CC!SBI X Gn! Insomniac Reader! Where the reader is an insomniac (Obviously-) but is somehow a pro at MC!

Like they are basically god at the game! They also REALLY enjoy horror games! They don’t get scared easily and LOVE horror movies! They basically love anything horror/creepy-

ANYWAYS!!

The reader lives off of ramen and Monster energy drinks (For fun-)! They have a Twitch (Which has about 18 mil followers and 14 mil subs!) and a YouTube channel (Which has 20 mil followers!)

They mainly play horror games (Obviously-) and MC!

You can do headcanons or scenarios/images with the SBI! Maybe like playing a horror game together or MC? OR! Maybe some things they do together? Or when they meet up? Or-to many ideas Nightmare-

ANYWAYS!

I don’t really care! And don’t worry about taking too long on it!

ALSO!

Maybe we could be friends? Only if you want too!

Remember to eat, drink, and get enough sleep!

<3

Yes. I lovesthese ideas and I'm gonna choose headcannons due to they are a bit easierfor me to write.

And yes I'm perfectly fine with being your friend! I'm actually happy to make friends on this app so yeah!

Pronouns:nonbinary

Tw: cussing. Insomia, mentions of horror movies. Mention of horror games. Fluff.

SBI with a horror streamer friend head cannons.

*Ahem* tommy wanted to paly a game with you so you choose a game that didn't look like horror until the middle. He screamed at the jump scare and it made both of your chats so happy.

When phil decides to play with you there is literally a silence after a jump scare. Everyone thought he had a heart attack and honestly so did you until he spoke up about accidently hitting his mute button when he jumped.

Wilbur. He's a bit better then tommy but more scared then phil would be. Any little noise won't get him but when it starts to get noticeable the noiseless to him. The jump scare, he'd fall out of his seat and stay on the ground for a bit. You ask if he's good and he literally doesn't answer. He's dead. You killed him. Congrats.

Techno. He'd handle them a bit better then everyone else. Not as good as you but heisnt very paranoid. He literally runs at the noises trying to get jumpscared. While you run after him telling him to stop because if he doesn't then you'd lose and die. And technoblade never dies.

If you all play together both tommy and wilbur pussy out. Techno last the longest and phil the second longest. While you remain the ruler of horror games.

Now how you all met was dream invited you to the dream smp to add to the chaos. Needless to say it got extremely chaotic due to you being on almost 24 hours. You first ran into techno. He seemed confused and skeptical.

You both found eachothers love for potatoes. You set up camp quote close to techno but not too close.

Phil popped in when he needed something for a build and noticed a new name. Talked to you in chat and asked to join your VC. You both found each other talking for a bit.

Wilbur was next. Wilbur got curious over the new person and just hoppedinto the same VC as you techno and phil. He was quick to realize that you were a famous youtuber. Mainly for your horror videos and your extreme Parkcore skills.

In minecraft that is.

Tommy noticing that all of you were in the same VC joined in with shouting. He was low key jealous that everyone was obsessed with you. Then he saw why.

You literally cracked jokes at his shouting.

"Is that an angry pomeranian? Nah nah. It's an angry child. Even better an angry blonde!" - you.

He was shocked and immediately started joking and laughing with you. He wasn't fully angry for long.

Now about your diet. When they heard that you had only eaten ramen and drank angry drinks they were concerned. You lived quite close to techno so when you guys met up he was shocked that you looked as healthy as you did.

He hated the fact that you literally didn't eat anything else.

You told him occasionally you have something other then ramen but you were just too lazy to really cook anything and that you didn't feel like burning the house down.

One month phil, tommy, wilbur, and techno decided to organize a month long sleep over so that they could celebrate your birthday. Phil being quote the father figure cooked different, but easy dinners every night just so you didn't eat only ramen that day.

When they actually arrived though you got a text from Phil asking about your address in your dms. Not think much of it you just sent him your location.

You were going to take a small nap. Just to bost your energy before you went and streamed later that night.

As you were sleeping there was a car heading to your house.

Phil, wilbur, tommy, and techno were all just existing in the car. And when they arrived to your house they didn't expect to actually see a clean house.

You woke to a loud knock.

When you opened the door in your half dazed state you expected a package. But to see four people standing on your porch.

You nearly jumped out of your skin.

You were stuck there blinking at them.

Finally snapping out of it you let them in. Confused on why in the ever loving fuck they were here.

Phil explained they were here to celebrate your 21st birthday and they were here for a month.

You stared at them for a while. Confused on what to do since you haven't had people over in almost 2 years.

But you got use to it.

So when you got done streaming and smelled something other then ramen you were thrown off guard. Like what was that. I haven't smelled that in years.

But after the second day you got use to it too.

For your birthday phil literally made a feast.

Like he found your favorite food other then ramen and cooked it. With that he prepared everything you could dream of.

Your sleeping habits. Let's dig into those.

I'm in no place to talk as right now it's 3:05 in the morning. And here I am.

But when they are over they don't let you stay up till no 3-4 in the morning. They all know the importance of sleep.

But there are those nights where no once can sleep and it results in a late night stream. And streaming for hours none the less.

The amount of accidental all nighters everyone has pulled was immense. But that's what happens with jet lag, adhd, and insomnia.

Literally you get tired randomly. Sleep for only 3 hours. Wake up. Drink coffee, energy drinks, highly caffeinated tea. And don't sleep till late at night.

Pillow forts.

It's a must and it happens. Horror movies, pillow forts, and snacks. Like you all are in this massive fort, watching horror movies, one by one you all are falling asleep. You and techno were the last up due to technos active mind and your body not letting you sleep.

You two literally just vide there, changing the movies from horror to some silly animated movies, like how to train your dragon, frozen, Luca, and many others.

You two pull an all nighter and it's actually a bet to see how long anyone else takes to notice.

You bet an hour. Techno says all day.

You won. Philza notices the worse eye bags under both you and technos eyes and immediately starts scolding.

He is papa bird and he won't let anyone of his children neglect their needs.

"Did you even drink water at all? You guys should of been sleeping not binge watching horror movies all night!" -philza

You could only offer a smirk, along with a laugh.

"I think we did I just can't fully remember. Also we were watching animated films. Not horror. Surprised you didn't wake up to let it go." - you.

You turn to techno.

"You owe me 15 bucks pig boy!"-you again.

Handing you the money he rolls his eyes. "Yeha yeah. Rub it in." -techno.

Ah yeah they found a horror game that you were scared of surprisingly. It was actually surprisingly you hadn't played it yet.

Outlast.

You had been holding off that game until you finished your other one but here you were. Bored out of your mind.

So you decided fuck it.

That game teriffed the shit out of you. It was so good though.

When you screamed they all came rushing up due to the fact that you never scream.

They say you out of your chair, on the floor, blinking. They thought you were hurt.

But you sat up and looked at your computer.

"Damn. That was actually really good." When you looked behind you and found the boys all staring you smiled and waved.

"You need something?"-you

"You screamed. We heard a thud. We thought you fuckin died!" -tommy.

"No I'm alive. My soul almost divorced my body but it's still quite here."-you

That day made highlights.

The popular y/n actually got jump scared. The one person who never screamed at horror games screamed.

When they left you were sad yes but they were still your best friends. Ready to talk when ever you want.

Sometimes I think that you guys talk all through out the night. Them forgetting that you were actually in a different time zone.

Sometimes they pop into your streams, be it MC, horror, you just talking to your fans, or even the once in the blue moon, cheerful games.

They just pop in and start talking to you. And you talk back like they were there since the beginning.

Phil is now one of your moderators too. Along with tommy, wilbur, and techno. When they pop in they make sure no one picks on you.

And since you are now close to the SBI. You are now part of it.

You didn't choose the fans did. But they are your new family. No matter what.

Even if they disagree with your eating habit.

Or energy drink addiction.

Or insomnia.

Or you mainly playing horror games.

Or you basically living in your streaming room.

Or even the nearly 24 hour streams.

I could go on but I'm not gonna.

I'm tired. But I can sleep. 2 days and I get to have a tour of my new school.

And it took so long to finally get into it.

We have been going through a huge hassle even before school started to get me enrolled.

And then we had to get me into this program.

But now on Monday I get to go in. Get a tour. Then start either Tuesday or Wednesday.

Anyway hope you liked. It's now 3:50 and it's no proof read I'm sorry

[arrogantsonofabiscuit]

Wearing his high school jersey & falling asleep on him

Feat:- Sakusa, Kuroo, Oikawa and Tsukishima

Genre:- fluff and mentions of pet names ( Kuroo talks about your butt ) suggestive.

A/n:- Sakusa give me your shirt now challenge 🙄😤.

Haikyuu masterlist | | General masterlist

✮Sakusa:-

You were in the kitchen making dinner for you and Sakusa . Knowing how tired he’d be because of his practice you decided to make him some tea which soothes him.

“Hey love” Sakusa replies as he enters your house with a tired voice.

“Bad day?” You ask him and grab his hand making him sit on the chair near the kitchen countertop.

“Yes” he replies with a faint smile and places his hand on the table. “What are you making today?”

“Your favourite but anyways so you wanna take a warm bath first Omi? It will help you to relax a bit. I believe your muscles would be sore right now.”

“Yes I will be bathing. Thanks love” he gets up from the chair and kisses the bridge of your nose and he chuckles when you scrunch your nose.

After his bath you serve him his dinner and talk about your day and how did your colleagues mess up work you know the usual gossips. “You know what would make me feel better?”

“What’s that?”

“Only if you don’t mind, could you um-wearmyshirt?”

“I am sorry what? I couldn’t catch the last part?” You pay attention to him furrowing your brows in concentration.

“Could you wear my shirt?”

“The itachiyama one? Or the one which I brought from the msby merch?”

“My itachiyama one with my jersey number on it with my name written on it . If that’s what you wanted to know” he pouts looking away from you .

You wear his shirt and cuddle him on the couch watching some tv series . “Omi are you feeling better?” You ask him as you shift closer to his chest laying your head listening to his heart beat.

“Yes thanks love. I-uh wanna say that I really appreciate you a lot even though I can’t express it well. But I love you and will always. Love?” He could hear soft snores coming from you , Kiyoomi smiles as he realizes that his heart beat and him playing with your hair made you fall asleep.

He was happy for the fact that you were comfortable around him, you were content with him. He places a chaste kiss on your forehead mumbling a I love you and resumes stroking your hair.

✮Kuroo:-

You were standing on the step ladder taking out the delivery boxes from the upper cabinet, whereas Kuroo was cleaning the coffee table, showcase and was stealing glances at you.

“Tetsu, stop looking at my butt and help me take those boxes out” you pout.

“I wasn’t looking at your-“ you cut him off by scoffing “you sure?”

“Okay fine I am you can’t take my ‘gawking at your butt privileges’ away from me”

“When did you come up with that ?”

“While I was cleaning the coffee table”

“oh”

After completing the task at hand you guys settle down on the couch ordering take out and watch some reality shows . You stifle a yawn and shift closer to him resting your head on his shoulder.

“Sleepy?”

“Kinda” he brings his arms closer to you and kisses your forehead stroking your hair gently.

“Tetsu were you only looking at my butt or something else?”

“You are quite smart aren’t you? Is it because you are staying with me that your brain is working well?”

You hit his chest huffing. “Ouch sorry just kidding . Yes I want just looking at your butt , I was looking at my jersey . Where did you find it?”

“I found it yesterday while cleaning the wardrobe, does it look good?”

“It does and I love it on you more. You look adorable”

“ oh thank you love” you blush and he kisses your lips stroking your cheeks affectionately. As Kuroo continued stroking your hair you fell asleep on him , he looks down at you smiling widely . “I love you “

“I love you more Tetsu”

“So you are not taking my ‘privileges’ away from me are you?”

“Let me think” you giggle as he whines.

✮Oikawa:-

Tooru I am home!” You enter and place your shoes on the rack and enter your kitchen to drink water . Oikawa on the other had was in sitting on the couch watching some volleyball match to improvise.

 “Hey angel, where were you?” He asks as he opens his arms for you to hug him. You hug him and kiss his cheek “I went grocery shopping, we didn’t have milk in the fridge and some snacks . How was your practice?”

 “As usual tiring” 

“Oh how about I take a bath and cuddle with you while you watch your volleyball game hmm?”

 “Please do I wanna cuddle “ 

“Okay my whiny baby” you ruffle his hair earning a groan from your boyfriend.

After taking a quick shower you enter your living room to see that your boyfriend prepared some blankets on the couch with some hot chocolate you like.

“What’s all this?” you ask.

“Well I wanted to do this for you and that I-” 

“Tooru?”

“Where did you find my jersey?”

“It was in my wardrobe since you don’t wear them anymore I decided to steal them from your closet” you reply sheepishly trying to hide the blush which crept on your cheeks.

“Oh so you stole it huh, wait you said stole them?” he moves closer to you moving your hair out of your face and placing them behind your ear. Your heart was beating rapidly still not used to him.

“I-yeah I stole them since you did not offer me” you huff.

“Oh? really?” he places his hand under your jaw kissing your lips lovingly , still leaving your breathless.

“Let me cuddle you while I watch this match , are you fine with it?” 

You guys settle on the couch with you sitting on his lap, hugging him and nuzzling into his neck.

He smiles widely and continues watching his match occasionally rubbing your back.

Tooru sighs and closes his laptop. Gently nudging your shoulder so that you would get up from his lap and walk with him to your bedroom.

He realizes that you were fast asleep on him clutching his shirt in your fist snoring softly.

He smiles widely kissing your forehead picking you up and placing you on the plush of the bed.

You curl up to his side and nuzzle closer.

“I love you angel”

✮Tsukishima:-

You guys were out on a date basking each and every moment walking, hand in hand and enjoying meal. After the date you enter your shared apartment placing your shoes on the rack.

“Wanna freshen up?” he asks as he exits the bathroom with a towel on his shoulders.

“Yes”

“Wanna watch the movie ? The one which your friend suggested?” 

“Yes! I will quickly take a shower and watch the movie” you sprint towards your bathroom in excitement.

“Be carefu-, this girl/boy I swear” He chuckles lightly and switches on the tv to play the movie once you arrive.

You sit on the couch munching the popcorn he kept on the coffee table.

“So we want to devour it before we watch the movie?” he teases as he sits closer to since the tv was not visible where he was previous siting (no other reason at all no.)

“Where did you find this?” he points towards his your jersey hanging loosely on your form, showing off your shoulder slightly.

“I stole it from your old house and well your brother told me that you don’t want it so I gladly took it”

“I am glad you took it because I didn’t want to give it away”

“That’s the only reason Kei?” you tease him

“Maybe, shall we watch the movie?” he was blushing and was hiding his cheeks.

You shift closer to your boyfriend placing your head on his shoulder stifling a yawn, you couldn’t keep you eyes open for long and fell asleep on his shoulder.

“I guess this the part were he would tell he-” 

“Y/n are you listening to me?” He looks at his shoulder watching your sleeping form with you mouth open.

“Why are you like this?” He picks you up and places you on the bed kissing your cheek.

“Kei? Cuddle me” you pout and struggle to keep your eyes open , he was smiling widely at you and your little tantrums.

“Needy much?”

“Only for you “ you smile and nuzzle into his chest falling asleep again.

“Be mine only” He strokes your hair and kisses your forehead .

Thank you for reading. Take care<3

Reblogs are highly appreciated <3

[theirbbygirl]

Second Lead Syndrome

Word Count: ~8.7k words

liked this? there’s more on my masterlist!

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Comedy, Female reader insert

Description: Y/n and Minho have been friends for more than 2 years now, but suddenly she begins to see herself as the mere second lead in Minho’s story. Will she be the rare second lead who gets her own happy ending?

Warnings: some crying, themes of unrequited love (if there’s anything that I missed don’t hesitated to let me know!) 

I’d only ever encountered Second Lead Syndrome in the dramas I’d watched. Wanting the girl to end up with the second lead who was so obviously the better and healthier choice, but like every avid watcher of kdramas, it's more than likely for the main leads to end up with each other, that was just how it worked. What I never thought I’d encounter was seeing it happen before my own eyes and experience it firsthand.

Life was never supposed to be a kdrama. Life was supposed to be simple, a straight line, going from point A to B with no complications. But life never really went my way did it? It just had to throw in one variable, one man that had too much influence on my life. 

I couldn’t remember the first time I met Minho. It was probably sometime in the first grade when his family first moved in next to mine. But alas, we were both too young to remember exactly what sparked our friendship. One day we were strangers and the next we had given our parents a near heart attack when we both went after a stray cat on the way back home (my mom’s words, not ours).  From then my memories were filled with him, just us besties hanging out like anyone would with their best friend. First party, first mental breakdown, first drink, all with him. Soon enough we were in our final year of University, and ultimately, adults. 

The Minho I knew was laid back, not too extroverted but not too introverted either. While I completely contrasted him, always anxious about something, wanting perfection to the T, and completely and utterly introverted.  Our friendship, moving into University, sparked a lot of questions. You wouldn’t typically find the introverted straight-A student with the borderline badboy tsundere walking and laughing in the halls together, spending practically every waking moment together. But Minho didn’t care, and neither did I, so we moved through life pretty easily. 

One of the few things we had in common was our love for cats, and when we both foudn out there was a cat cafe just a few minutes walk from our campus, you best bet we spent too much of our time and money there. Studying, hanging out, anything you could imagine. If we weren’t in one of our dorms, we were more than likely to be in the cat cafe. 

Every day after class we’d go there and we’d complain about our least favorite professors and how lectures would seemingly last for longer than they should. Additionally, Minho had almost become akin to my own dormmate with how much time he spent in my dorm. He’d come in whenever he wished, stealing my frozen pizzas and sodas, using my Netflix account on my TV to watch weird National Geographic shows and make random comments like “that snake looks just like Kim Seungmin,” or “look its Hannie” whenever a squirrel came on screen. Minho was always there when I needed a drinking partner after bombing a test or assignment, pouring me shots of soju until I passed out and bringing me to my bed and tucking me in whiel he would sleep on the couch to make sure I wouldn’t do anything stupid in the middle of the night. 

Although, more people knew Minho’s name than mine, but that didn’t bother any of us. We continued on being friends as usual, and it felt like nothing would change that. Life was moving in a straight line like it should’ve always been.

At least, that’s what it felt like until February, just a few months before we graduated. 

I make my way to our usual spot in the courtyard after buying an iced coffee and a snickers bar from the vending machine next to my classroom, I walk up behind Minho sitting on a bench when I find him staring out in front of him instead of looking at cat videos on his phone like he usually does. Slowing my walk, I trail my eyes to the vague direction he’s facing and see that he’s looking at Kim Seungmin and a girl chatting outside the classroom. I ignore the thought, opting to think that Minho must’ve spaced out thinking about how he would irritate Seungmin next class. I plop down next to him when he still doesn’t take note of my arrival, so I get right next to his ear and blow cold air into it, snickering when he jolts in surprise. 

“What was that for?” He whines, fake annoyed.

“You got lost up in your thoughts for a certain Kim Seungmin there.” I snicker some more, opening my snickers (hehe) bar.

Just as I’m about to take the first bite of the sugary goodness, the chocolate bar gets snatched out of my hands and a certain Lee Minho takes an obnoxious bite out of it, not even giving it back but eating it like it was his. I pout, watching him devour my snack, knowing that I couldn’t do anything to get it back. 

“For your information, I was not thinking about Kim Seungmin.” He says pointedly, slightly muffled by the chocolate in his mouth.

I sigh, knowing I wasn’t going to get that chocolate bar back any time soon, and open my iced coffee. “So what were you thinking about then?” I ask before taking a sip.

“Don’t know, spaced out.” Is all the answer I get and I highly doubt him, but I brush it off anyways and don’t pry. 

Minho and I slide into our usual conversation about assignments, plans for the week, and everything under the sun. We talk about how he’s planning to visit home the next day and stay for a weekend and how excited he is to see his cats after a long time, I unknowingly smile at his ramble about how talkative Dori is, and just sit back and listen. I never took into account how healing it was to just watch and listen to him talk, the sultry of his voice and his little exclamations of frustration or excitement that came once in a while. I had to catch myself from staring when he turned to look at me, having asked me a question I didn’t catch.

“Sorry what was that?” I ask.

“Am I that beautiful for you to have lost your hearing to my handsome face?” I couldn’t just tell him that that was basically what had happened, it would inflate his ego by too much and reveal everything I’d hidden thus far.

“The heck? No, I was thinking about how great it would be to get some peace and quiet while you’re not around this weekend.” I lie, having Minho around is the only thing that brings me entertainment that isn’t endless sappy kdramas on my laptop, but he can never know that. 

Minho scoffs, says something under his breath that I don’t quite catch, then turns back to me. “You love me.” He says with a pout.

“Unfortunately I do.” 

That was the first of many inconspicuous confessions. 

It was nearing 3 or 4 am and I was about halfway done with another kdrama when several knocks resound through the small living space. Knowing exactly who it is, I only shout back “you know the code!” and moments later the door opens. 

I don’t bother to get up and greet Minho, this exact scene has happened too many times for either of us to care at this point, and it doesn’t surprise me that the moment he enters he shouts, “Honey I’m home!” like we’re in some cheesy romcom. 

“Mhmm, welcome home, leech.” I enunciate the last word purposely, but I know he won’t bat an eye at the term. I continue to chew my popcorn while he wanders through my cabinets, looking for snacks. “There’s chips in the cabinet next to the fridge and sprite in there too. If you want more food order Chinese takeout.” 

“I don’t have my wallet.” I can practically hear his pout from where I sat, eyes unmoving from the TV screen. 

“You know where mine is, but you have to pay me back.” A few seconds pass with no response until suddenly he’s next to me and kissing my cheek.

“I loveeee you!” He says too sweetly, retreating back to the mini-kitchen to order takeout.

“Mhmm, I love you too.” I say, not loud enough for him to hear the confidence missing from my tone. 

Continuing to watch the episode of in front of me, I remain in my comfortable position, only moving to lift my legs when Minho comes back to sit on the couch under my legs and the blanket. 

“Oh you’re watching this one?” He asks, reaching into the bowl of popcorn I offer him.

“Yeah, didn’t have anything else to watch so I put it on since everyone seems to like it so much.” 

“Mm,” he hums while also indulging himself into the scenes playing in front of him. “You’re probably team potato guy, right?” 

“What kind of question is that? Of course I am!” I scoff.

“I don’t know, I still think she should end up with Jae-eon.”

“Are you crazy? He literally leads her on like every playboy and is ruining her mentality by not defining their relationship.” 

“Yeah, but they’re so cute together, and you can totally tell he feels something for her.” He argues.

“Just cause they’re cute together doesn’t mean they’re good for each other, the entire guy is a walking red flag, I don’t understand why she doesn’t just walk away when she’s had experience with a shit boyfriend.” I sigh.

“You, have major second lead syndrome.” He points an accusing finger at me.

“So what? It’s for good reason, the main lead is toxic as fuck and you can’t change my mind.” I upturn my nose, turning back to the TV and continuing to watch the episode. 

The mentioning of the second lead sends a flurry of thoughts into my brain for a reason I can’t comprehend. Sometimes the main leads aren’t that bad but still we want the main character to end up with the second lead, maybe out of our own natural selfishness because we prefer the second lead more. I shake the thoughts away, trying to convince myself that kdramas were only works of fiction and too cheesy to be real, yet for whatever reason I always felt a connection with the second leads, like our emotions directed to our crushes were the same, because I knew that I would always be the second lead in Minho’s story. 

Minho’s name was always called out more times than mine was growing up, which I didn’t really mind until our hangout time would be seriously cut down because he had to hang out with other friends. Don’t get me wrong, I loved that he had friends, but there was a little bit of selfishness in me that wanted him to myself.

A new drama and a few episodes later, plus Chinese takeout, lead to our eventual demise. We both fall asleep on the couch in less than comfortable positions and wake up with stiff-neck, us groaning at the pain. 

We continue on with our usual morning routines, taking turns freshening up in the bathroom before heading out for breakfast at Paws and Pastries since we were both too lazy to make food ourselves. Besides, hot coffee in the morning plus good sandwiches AND cats? What more could you ask for?

When we enter the cat cafe I notice a familiar face behind the cashier, it was the same girl Seungmin was talking to on Friday, and the same girl I caught Minho staring at. We walk up to the cashier, I order my food first, a simple breakfast sandwich with a coffee to go with it and wait next to Minho to finish ordering. 

I made the mistake up glancing up at his face as he was telling his order to her, Ahra, her name tag read. There was something in his eyes that glinted that I had never seen before, not when he talked to Han and not when he talked to me. I couldn’t help but feel a pang of emotion in the middle of my chest before forcing myself to look back down, inserting my card and paying for everything. I sent the girl a thank you and a kind smile after she told us our food would be right over, and both me and Minho went over to our usual table in the back corner next to the cat’s jungle gym and right up next to the window. I get lost in my thoughts while we begin playing with the cats we were so accustomed to. 

Like most second leads, I knew exactly what my feelings were. I was practically an adult, how could I miss the fast beating of my heart or my clammy hands whenever I was around him? But again, like most second leads, I knew I’d never get a chance with him, not when everything we did together was purely platonic. It was painfully obvious that I’d be stuck with an unrequited love for who knows how long, and I couldn’t just detach myself from him all of a sudden to get over my feelings because a) he’d notice and force me to tell him what was wrong, ultimately leading me to tell him that I had feelings for him, and b) the moment I would come back or see him for even just a second I know I would develop those feelings all over again. Neither of which were choices I was willing to take so I suck it up and see him every day, ignoring everything my heart was telling me. 

I look up from the cat that I’m petting in my lap and look at Minho again, only to find him staring at Ahra who was taking people’s orders with a perfect pearly smile. It was in that moment that I knew, I had just found the female lead of Minho’s story.

3 weeks go by in a similar manner. Minho and I see Ahra around campus a few times and with some twisted fate, she’s on the clock every time we go to Paws and Pastries. Minho, being his smooth self, easily gets himself acquainted with her. They laugh and giggle so naturally and can slip into conversation so easily I’m almost envious of Minho and his non-introverted self. 

Not being one to try and stop fate, I watch it all happen. Telling Minho to ask her out already and teasing him about how lovesick he gets when he sees her nearby or at the cafe. I know Minho likes her when he blushes or gets defensive whenever I mention her in our conversations even though he’s never explicitly told me himself. I put on a face in front of him whenever these conversations come up, not wanting to get in the way of his happiness. 

One day some of our friends want to meet up outside of campus, we make plans to meet up at a bowling alley, ready to have fun until the late evening hours. Seungmin brought Ahra along with him, asking if it was okay to invite her since they were friends. Everyone agrees and we all meet up as planned. When everyone gets there, including Seungmin and Ahra, we introduce ourselves, Minho not having to introduce himself and easily speaking with her like they always did whenever running into each other. All the the boys have raised brows and mischievous smiles as they watch the interaction between the two, but only one looks at me in concern. 

A majority of the night passes by with laughter and teasing, how Chan was terrible at bowling this night and Minho easily beating him despite never doing too well on our previous adventures to the bowling alley. I spend the night with the rest of the boys, while Minho and Ahra spend time getting to know each other even more. There’s a point in the evening where I see Minho hold out his phone to Ahra to exchange numbers, I can hear her giggle when they take a selfie together, probably for her profile picture. I have to turn my head away quickly to ignore the cracking of my own heart when Minho puts his arm on the couch behind Ahra, he does it so naturally, yet he’s never done it with me. I will my thoughts to focus on the game and not on Minho, not noticing the same pair of concerned eyes until they speak up.

“Are you alright?” Hyunjin asks. 

“Hm? Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” My voice cracks halfway through and I try to hide my sad eyes, even though I was fully aware that Hyunjin had probably noticed that something was up.

“‘Cause you seem pretty affected by that scene over there.” He motions to Minho and Ahra with a nod of his head. 

“It’s nothing, Hyun, just nice seeing Minho talking to more people.”

“Y/n, you know he talks to people all the time, and you’re not nearly as affected then as you are now.” 

“Hyunjin, really, it’s fine.” I try to convince him but he says something that lets me know that he knows.

“You like Minho.”

“What? No that’s absurd I-“ He looks at me pointedly, and I sigh in defeat. “Yeah, okay, you got me.”

“Why don’t you say anything? Clearly it hurts you to see him like that.” He refers to Minho getting cozy with her.

“Hyunjin, it’s clear that everything we have is platonic, he even called me his sister several times. And who am I to get in the way of him getting into a relationship? That’s not my place to say anything, especially when his last girlfriend was 2 years ago.” 

“I get that, but shouldn’t he at least deserve to know? He says that he knows everything about you, but there’s one thing that he doesn't. You know practically everything about him, isn’t it a little unfair?” 

“We have choices as to what we share with each other and what we don’t, it’s his choice to tell me what he wants to and my choice to tell him what I want to tell him. Besides, he hasn’t even told me that he has a crush on Ahra yet.” 

“So maybe he doesn’t then.” 

“Hyunjin, just look at him, he’s a puppy in love.” I glance back over to Minho and Ahra sitting parallel to us. Minho is smiling brightly, more brightly than I had seen in a while and I can’t help but let my lips upturn at the corners just slightly in another sad smile. 

Hyunjin sighs next to me, and I look back to him. “I’m sorry y/n, I really wish he would end up with you instead of her, it doesn’t seem fair to you.”

“Hey, don’t say that, Ahra seems like a nice girl, she and Minho will get along great. And nothing in life is fair Hyunjin, that’s just something you come to accept.” I say, getting up. “I’m gonna get some drinks, does anyone want anything?” I ask everyone.

“Cola!” “Me too!” “Me three!” “A lemonade please.” A few of the boys shout back.

“Anything for you guys?” I turn to Minho and Ahra. They both shake their heads. “Okay then, I’ll be back in a minute guys.” I smile at the group before going to get the drinks. 

While walking away from the group I let a teardrop fall from my eye, wiping it away just before I order.

Life’s unfair, that’s just something I have to accept. 

A week goes by and Minho’s talking about how he and Ahra message often, how he thinks they get along well and he’s gonna ask her out.

Another week goes by and they’ve gone on their first date, he takes her to the beach and they have a picnic. 

Two weeks after that they’ve gone on several dates and are officially boyfriend and girlfriend, I don’t even find out separately at this point, I find out with the rest of the group over dinner.

A few days after that Minho calls off one of our late night binge watching sessions, texting me an apology and that Ahra needs him. I tell him it’s okay and to send my regards to her. 

It’s a week and half after and Minho regularly calls off our meetups at the cafe after school or at one another’s dorms to tend to Ahra. I tell him it’s fine each time and to not feel bad. He did the same today, and I sit alone at our usual table, mindlessly petting a cat in my lap while zoning out into in my mug of coffee. 

All while this happens, I watch, and I let it happen. I don’t fight for him because it didn’t feel right, sometimes second leads let their love fall for someone else, and that’s all it felt like I could do. 

Fighting for Minho felt selfish, especially when I knew I had no chance and he’d already fallen for Ahra. I couldn’t suddenly come out of the blue and tell him “hey, I have feelings for you,” when he’s already dating Ahra, I’d look like a major asshole if I did. All I could do was watch and see how we begun to drift farther and farther apart. 

With Minho being absent more often, I don’t get to tell him much. Like the internship offer I got to continue pursuing graphic design in Itaewon. I got the email almost a week ago, and I had two more weeks to decide if I was going to take the offer. With nobody to consult about it with I continue to push it to the back of my mind, not wanting to deal with more stress just yet. 

Just as I’m taking another sip of my coffee a familiar head of long blonde hair enters the cafe. My head tilts to the side in confusion as he scans the room for someone when he meets eyes with me, he makes his way over and sits in the seat in front of me and doesn’t say anything.

“You’re rarely on this side of town, why are you here?” I ask Hyunjin first.

“I heard something from Ms. Kim in our art class and needed to know if it was true.” He says seriously.

“What…” I feel like I know what he’s going to say, but I ask anyways. “What did you hear?” 

“That you were offered an internship in Itaewon.” 

“Hyunjin I-“

“Is it really true? She said you had two more weeks to decide, how come you haven’t told anybody? Does Minho know? Are you gonna leave? What about-” He begins to spurt out question after question and it’s almost too much for me to handle.

“Hyunjin!” I raise my voice just slightly to get him to stop but I have to turn it down again when the volume of my voice makes a few of the other customers’ heads turn. “Calm down, yes it’s true, yes I have two more weeks to decide if I’m going or not, I didn’t know how I would tell any of you, no, Minho doesn’t know and I don’t plan on telling him.” 

“Are you… Are you gonna take the offer?” He asks slowly.

I prop my elbows onto the table as the cat leaves my lap and my head drops into my hands as I sigh in exasperation. “I don’t know.” Tears are gathering in my eyes as I think about it. 

“Y/n, have you thought about the offer at all?” 

“Yes and no.” I don’t need to lift my head to sense Hyunjin’s confusion. “It’s hard to think about it when you’re watching your crush of 2 years date someone else while you’re also trying to finish up your senior year. But it’s also all I can think about when I’m alone, which I find myself a lot, thinking about having to find a place to live in Itaewon and transfer and mentally prepare to leave you all here, but if I don’t take it then it’ll be even harder to find an offer like this. It’s all I can think about and also something that I can’t bring myself to think about, Hyunjin.” I lift my head and my teary eyes meet his own. 

“Y/n…” His voice breaks saying my name.

“I think I’m going to take it.” I pause. “Once I finish all of my final assignments the only thing I have left to really worry about is graduating and finding a job, and I don’t think I can take watching Minho and Ahra anymore Hyun, I don’t think I can stomach it. I’m happy for them, I truly am, but it’s also affecting me and I don’t think I should ignore that anymore. If I’m in Itaewon I have a job and I won’t have to worry about feelings anymore, two birds with one stone.” 

I see the hesitancy in Hyunjin’s facial expressions before he speaks. “If that’s what you think you should do, then I’ll support you all the way. But shouldn’t you tell Minho about this?” 

“I’m not, because if I do, Minho is gonna find some way to get me to stay and I’ll crumble and stay because he affects me the most.” Hyunjin merely nods in response. “Hyunjin, you are the only one that can know about this, okay? I can’t have everyone else know this, especially Minho, okay?”

Hesitation again, and then, “Okay.” 

Hyunjin keeps his promise, he keeps the secret of me leaving from everyone. Even as graduation inches closer and our group begins to talk more about job searching, what comes next, and similar topics, the two of us keep it a secret. Whenever they asked me what I was thinking of doing next I always just told them “oh probably looking for internships nearby,” and no more questions are asked. 

Minho and Ahra were still very much in love, even more than before, if the growing absence of Minho’s presence was anything to go by. I barely saw Minho anymore, maybe catching him at the end of the hall every once in awhile, but he was always walking with Ahra so all I could say was “hello” and “goodbye.” 

Each goodbye begun to hold more and more weight as the days passed. Even the short ones I would tell Minho after passing him in the halls. I couldn’t even conjure how I would tell everyone, maybe send a letter to each of their places? A text message? Tell them after the graduation ceremony just before I left for the train station? I thought about how I would say goodbye as I begun to pack up my dorm. Graduation was nearing, I had already turned in all of my final assignments, and all there was left was to pack. I would leave after the ceremony ended, sometime in the afternoon. I wouldn’t even get the chance to properly celebrate being graduates with my friends because I was leaving in the afternoon. I’d get situated in my new apartment in Itaewon and get accustomed to new life outside of Gimpo. 

The thought of leaving panged my heart harshly, I had never left Gimpo permanently before. Sure, I had gone on trips to the US and Singapore and Seoul before, but I had never moved from Gimpo. I was born and raised in Gimpo, met Minho and all of our friends here, so the thought of moving for the first time did something to my heart. I attended all of our group hangouts with a nostalgic mindset, remembering the first time we all met, when we all got wasted one time on a Friday night after some big exam week. I look around our table of friends and think about how much I’ll miss all of this when I leave for Itaewon. 

Another thing that panged my heart, Minho and I distancing. I knew it was coming, Minho and I didn’t text or talk about hanging out anymore. He walked Ahra to her classes now, and had dates with her after class instead of meeting me at our cafe. Eventually I stopped getting apology messages, and stopped expecting him at the cafe anymore. I couldn’t blame him, Ahra was his girlfriend and I accepted that long ago. Instead I just played the supportive friend on the sidelines, and I’d continue to play that role for as long as I had to. 

It came to be the night before we graduated, and all of us minus Minho and Ahra were sat around a table in one of the restaurants we frequented, it wasn’t too late in the evening, and we all just sat in silence after finishing our food with bottles and glasses of soju now sitting in front of us. A majority of our meal was full of reminiscing, talking about memories that crack everyone up and left smiles on our faces. 

“So, we really graduate tomorrow, huh?” Changbin says when the table quiets down.

“Yeah, I guess we do.” Chan says quietly. 

My eyes tear up and I begin to sniff without control, the weight of my department tomorrow weighing heavily on my shoulders. Hyunjin puts an arm around my shoulders and gives me a tissue, whispering “it’s okay, it’s okay” to me while I try to calm down.

Everyone looks at me in confusion before Chan speaks first. “Y/n are you okay?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I just…” I trail off, not sure what to say.

“Do you want to tell them?” Hyunjin asks softly.

“Tell us what?” Seungmin says this time.

Hyunjin looks to me first before nodding, and I begin to spill my secret. “I got an internship offer.” 

The table erupts in cheers and I get congratulations thrown back at me before I can even continue.

“But…” Immediately everyone silences and looks to me in expectation. “It’s in Itaewon.” 

There’s a tense air that falls around us. “What?” Felix says in disbelief.

“You’re not leaving us, right Noona?” Jeongin asks from another part of the table. 

I look to Jeongin with sad eyes, smiling sadly. “I leave tomorrow, after our graduation ceremony.” There’s some gasps around the table.

“What?! Y/n, why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Changbin blows up and Chan has to place a hand on his shoulder to restrain him.

“I didn’t want every time we met leading up to graduation to feel like a goodbye, Bin, I couldn’t handle that. So I kept it from you all so there wasn’t this tension every time we met.” I explained.

“Does Minho know?” Seungmin asks this time, and I shake my head.

“Y/n…” Han says worriedly.

“Guys, I know I’m not the only one that’s noticed that me and Minho aren’t that close anymore, so I haven’t really gotten the chance to tell him. But I told Hyunjin this a long time ago, that I wouldn’t tell Minho specifically, because there’s some things that I need to figure out and if I told him he’d find some way to keep me from going, or even worse, follow me. At least with Ahra by his side he won’t follow me to Itaewon.” There’s nods all around the table, understanding where I’m coming from.

“We’re gonna miss you a lot.” Felix sniffs and I coo, getting up from my seat to wrap my arms around him from behind. 

“I’m gonna miss you all too.” I sniff with him, a few tears escaping my eyes. 

Chan comes to join our hug, then Han, then Jeongin, and soon enough everyone has joined the group hug with me in the middle. All of us are crying, and I had never felt more loved than that moment. 

Eventually we break away from the hug and return to our seats, everyone dabbing at their eyes with tissues and sniffing. 

“Let’s all stop crying, tonight is a night to celebrate, all of us graduate tomorrow, and our dear Y/n got an internship offer in a big city!” Han holds up a drink and we all do the same, cheering and clinking our glasses together and celebrating the night away. 

The next morning I get ready for graduation early, putting on my makeup and doing my hair, and sending a message. 

to: [cat dad who’s a leech :D]

hey, can you meet me at p&p in thirty?

My heart picks up the pace as I send the message, I didn’t expect him to answer so quickly yet his message pings my phone within 2 minutes. 

from: [cat dad who’s a leech :D]

sure, i can be there

to: [cat dad who’s a leech :D]

sweet, i’ll see you there

I turn my phone off and take a deep breath, we still had a few hours before we had to be at the school for our graduation ceremony, I’d have to leave just a few minutes after the ceremony ended which wouldn’t give me enough time to tell Minho, so, I made the painful decision the night before to tell him in the morning. I’d do it in our favorite spot in the corner of our favorite cat cafe, tell him the news slowly and hope that he takes it well. 

I leave my house and 15 minutes later I’m in our usual booth, my coffee order sitting in front of me and the cats all wandering around as there weren’t too many people since it was relatively early in the morning. I already bought Minho his typical Iced Americano and it sat in front of me, awaiting it’s owner. 

10 minutes later Minho arrives and makes his way to the table, sitting in front of me, smiling, unknowing of what’s about to happen. 

“Hey.” I smile at him.

“Hey you.” He smiles back brightly. “Sorry I couldn’t see you guys last night, I took Ahra out for dinner last night on a date.”

“It’s completely alright, how are you guys?” 

“Pretty good, things are going okay right now.” He answers.

“That’s good.” Nervously I take a sip of my macchiato in front of me, my leg bouncing in anxiety. 

“Y/n? Is everything alright? Your leg’s bouncing pretty fast right now.” Curse Minho and the fact that he knows so much about me, he reaches out for my wrist and checks my pulse, quickly noticing how fast it’s beating as his brows furrow in confusion. 

“Minho, there’s something I need to tell you.” I say, retracting my wrist from his grip. He doesn’t answer me but instead tilts his head like a cat does when it looks at its owner questionably. “I’m leaving.” 

“What?” He asks.

How could one look so endearing, head tilted and eyes full of emotion as I break the news to him? I ask myself. “I got an internship offer for a company in Itaewon, I accepted it and I’m leaving for Itaewon, today.” 

“You’re leaving today?” He says in disbelief, sounding out of breath.

I nod and continue. “After the graduation today I have to catch my bus. I didn’t have any other time to tell you so I had to tell you now.” 

“You’re… You’re just telling me now? Do the others know about this?” 

“I only told them last night.”

“You couldn’t have thought of telling me sooner?” He starts to get angry.

“Minho I-“

“What happened to telling me everything, huh? What happened to when we used to know everything about each other?”

“Minho, those days are long behind us, you have bigger priorities now, like putting your focus on your girlfriend, Minho. I couldn’t tell you because I knew you’d do something rash, and I didn’t even tell the others until last night because I knew every time we’d see each other it would be like preparing for the day I leave. You and Ahra have something so great going on for the two of you right now and telling you that I was leaving would take you away from that, and I can’t do that to you or her. Ahra is an amazing girl, and you have her now.”

“Will you at least visit?” His eyes are full of tears, some of the first I’ve seen in years and I hate that I’m the cause of it. 

“I don’t know yet, there’s some things I need to figure out myself first, before I can visit. But at some point maybe I will, when I’ve figured things out I’ll try visiting from time to time.” I offer him a sad smile. 

After a few moments of silence I get up from my seat. 

“We still have a graduation left, Min, I’ll still see you then.” I ruffle his hair and walk out of the cafe, no more secrets but one weighing down on my chest. 

The Graduation ceremony passes by in a blur. One moment we were listening to the speeches of each of the professors and the next we were tossing our caps into the air, cheering as we became alumni of our university. 

Our friend group met up in the front of the school, taking pictures with our parents and congratulating each other. Eventually, the time comes and I have to go. 

Our group stands in a circle, unmoving, as we all look at each other. 

“I’m gonna miss all of you so much.” I say in tears as my voice breaks.

“We’re gonna miss you too, Y/n.” Hyunjin says. At his words everyone gathers into a group hug full of tears and the weight of a goodbye on our shoulders. 

“You better promise to visit us, okay?” Felix holds me by the shoulders and makes a point to look me in the eye. Not trusting my voice, I nod and he brings me into one more hug. 

I hug each of them individually, saying a few words, before I reach the last person. 

I hug Minho and look into his eyes for the last time for a while.

“I’ll miss you.” He whispers.

“Me too.” And that’s all I can say. 

I leave the campus for the last time, hopping in my car to head to the station and start anew.

Second leads always leave in the end, they leave and let the two main leads have a happy ending. That’s what it felt like I was doing, and I couldn’t tell if I was content with my choice or not. 

Two and a half months in Itaewon passes quickly. 

The move into my new apartment was smooth, and it was odd to be in a bigger space than a small dorm room. It felt like I had more space than I knew what to do with. 

My internship was moving along smoothly as well, everyone I had met so far were really kind and taught me a lot. I was worried about feeling out of place but I had met a few other girls not much older than me who helped me feel at home. 

Being alone in a big city was unnerving, but what made it so much more comfortable was the addition of a cat that my parents had bought me as my graduation gift. She was a chartreux cat who I named Luna because I had always dreamed of naming my first cat that. My parents covered most of the costs of basic things like cat toys, a scratch post, her bed, and similar things. I thanked my parents endlessly when they came over to my apartment a week after I had moved in and gave me Luna. I wasn’t gone for too long during the day and always left food for her, she was great company when I came home and worked on projects late into the evening, curling up into my lap like the cats at the old cafe used to. She was my best friend in a city I was still getting accustomed to. 

I hadn’t talked to the guys much, I’d talked with them a few times in the group chat about how their job searches were going and trips they were planning to take soon. It was nice talking with them every so often but all of us were still pretty busy moving onto the next chapter of our lives. 

I hadn’t talked to Minho since I left, I’d assumed that he and Ahra were doing well, but that’s all that was, assumption. None of the boys talked about him and I couldn’t understand why, but I never asked since I was supposed to be moving on from my feelings in the first place. I thought I had been doing pretty well until something would come up that reminded me of him, like his favorite song would play in the cafe I bought my morning coffee in and spent my breaks at, or snapchat would send me “Today, 1 year ago” memories of him and me fooling around at Paws and Pastries. Whenever that would happen I’d be sent back to square one, and it felt like I’d never move on from Minho. 

I was on my way out to grab a coffee and spend my off day walking around, maybe looking into a few shops when I got a call from Hyunjin.

“Y/n! My favorite girl, how are you?”

“Hyunjin? What’s with the call?”

“What? Can I not call my friends from time to time?”

“Not when you’re notorious for calling your ‘friends’ after you’ve done something wrong.” I sigh.

“That was one time! Besides, it wasn’t that bad.”

“You dragged Jeongin to a party! And got him wasted!” 

“One. Time. Y/n. It was one time.”

“One time is enough for you to be in trouble for life, Hyun.”

“Okay, whatever, but I was meaning to ask you, what’re your plans for today?” 

“Me? I was just planning to go out, today’s my day off so I was gonna visit this one cafe and see some shops, why?” 

“No reason, what time do you think you’ll be home?” 

“Maybe five?”

“Great, okay, I have to go now, Han’s calling me, bye!” Hyunjin hangs up before I can ask him what’s with the weird questions.

“Hyunjin- Oh great he hung up.” I put my phone in my pocket before looking down at Luna who’s stretching near my legs. “Your uncle Hyunjin is quite the odd one, isn’t he Luna, hm?” I ask her and she meows back in response. “Weird indeed, but that’s just how he is. Mommy’s gonna spend her day out and then she’ll come home and we can watch the TV together, okay? I’ll be home soon.” I pick up Luna and set her on her little bed before ensuring everything is safe and make my way out the door. 

I spend the day eating at a large cat cafe that actually had an assortment of books with little reading areas while the cats roamed around everywhere. It was much bigger than the cafe in Gimpo, but I would always correlate that one with home. 

After I spent a bit of time reading there I went out and explored the shops for a few hours, bought some new jeans and a few blouses plus some makeup things. I got Subway for lunch and explored just a little bit more before heading home. Instead of going straight home, I decided to take the long way, going through the streets not minding the extra weight the few shopping bags I was holding in my hands gave me. The sun was just barely beginning to set as I walked into my apartment complex, getting into the elevator and pressing the button for my floor. 

I walk down the hallway to my door and am surprised when a familiar figure greets me there. 

“Minho?” I say as I walk closer. 

“Y/n!” He says happily, bringing me into a hug. 

“What are you doing here? Actually- Wait- Don’t answer that, do you wanna come inside?” I ask him.

“Sure.” He responds. 

I unlock the door and bring my bags in, setting them by the door. “Luna! Mommy’s home!” I call out automatically.

Luna meows and comes out of the bedroom, walking her way up to me before I pick her up. 

“You got a cat?” Minho asks.

“Yeah, parents brought her to me about a week after I moved in.” I put Luna back down and she moves to sit on the arm of the couch, her favorite spot to sit when the sun goes down.

“And you named her Luna,” He smiles fondly. “You always wanted to name your cat Luna.” 

“I’m surprised you remember that.” I chuckle. “Do you want some coffee?” 

“Sure.” 

“I’ll get that brewing, just give me a few minutes, you can take a seat on the couch and make yourself at home!” I tell him as I quickly retreat to the kitchen.

I have to take a few breaths when I’m far away enough from Minho, my heart beating just as fast as it would when I was around him back then. It was clear I hadn’t moved on at all. 

I brew the coffee as promised and wait next to the coffee machine with two mugs ready. A voice chimes in behind me.

“Your place is much bigger than the dorms.” He chuckles.

“Tell me about it, it was so weird buying more furniture than I was used to.” I laugh with him. 

The machine finishes brewing the coffee and I pour it into the two mugs, putting it on a tray with creamer and sugar before bringing it all to the coffee table in front of the couch. 

Minho and I take seats on the couch, separated by a bit of space between us while we sip on our respective mugs.

“So,” I start the conversation. “How’s home?” 

“Not too bad, same old same old, the guys being annoying as usual, you know?” He says.

“Sounds fun.” I chuckle. “And work, have you found anything yet?” 

“Not yet, I’ve got a few applications out, but I’m still waiting on some answers.”

“I’m sure you’ll get them soon.” I respond. 

An uncomfortable silence sets over the both of us, and I run my free hand through Luna’s fur who’s situated herself in my lap this time. I take a long sip of my coffee before asking another question.

“How’s… How are you and Ahra?” 

“Oh…” He trails off. “We broke up a few weeks ago.” 

“I’m sorry to hear that…” I had no idea that he and Ahra had broken up, in fact that was the completely opposite of what I thought had happened since they seemed to work together so well. 

“Yeah, it was a mutual thing. We didn’t really feel that kind of connection anymore, you know? So we just, broke it off.” 

“Are you okay?” I ask Minho.

“Me? Yeah, I’m actually not as affected as I thought I’d be, I don’t know if that makes me a cruel person or not but I was only sad for the first week or two. Nothing too bad.” 

“I see.” Another silence settles between us. This one is longer, more tense, there was something Minho wanted to ask but he wasn’t sure, and I couldn’t depict what question he was going to ask.

“Actually, I came her for a reason.” He says.

“And what reason is that?” I ask hesitantly.

“For answers.” My brows furrow, answers for what? “There’s something Hyunjin told me recently and it got me thinking, and I wanted to hear it from you if it was true.”  

I finish my coffee and place it down delicately on the coffee table, trying not to show how nervous I was with how badly my hands were shaking. “I’ll see if I have answers for you then.” 

“When you told me you were leaving, you said you had some, things, to figure out on your own. What was it that you had to figure out?” 

I take a moment to decide exactly how I was going to answer his question. Did I want to expose my feelings to him just yet? “Just, feelings.” I say vaguely.

“For?”

“Just feelings for somebody.”

“Is it Hyunjin?”

“No.”

“Chan?”

“Nope.”

“Changbin?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Me?”

I pause for just a half second, and apparently that was all Minho needed. “I guess Hyunjin’s big mouth was right after all.”

“Wait- What? What are you talking about?” 

Minho takes a long sip of his coffee before finishing letting out a sigh after swallowing, he slowly sets the mug on the table before making direct eye contact with me and silently killing me with the suspense. “Minho please just say something you’re killing me here.”

He only chuckles in response. “Hyunjin told me not too long ago that you took up the offer to work here because you were going to sort out your feelings, for me.” He says sweetly as I suck in a breath at his last words. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Minho-“

“Now now, Y/n, we shouldn’t hide things from each other anymore, should we?” His sweet, sultry voice was affecting me greatly as he leaned closer to me on the couch. I gulp and silently curse when Luna, the only thing keeping me sane, leaves the comfort of my lap for her scratch-post. 

“Minho…” I let out quietly.

“Tell me, Kitten, is it true?” He asks once again. 

“I-“ My voice catches in my throat when Minho leans in ever nearer, still making direct eye-contact with me. “Yes, it is.” I sigh out and Minho backs away. 

“He was right.” Minho whispers while my gaze drops to my hands that I fiddle with in my lap at the secret that’s let out. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m sorry.” I whisper.

“Why are you sorry darling?” He asks softly and uses his thumb and forefinger to tilt my head up by my chin. 

“I couldn’t tell you because I knew you didn’t feel the same, and then when you got together with Ahra we drifted apart because it hurt me to see you with her. Then I left and told you about me leaving so last minute. I made you cry, Minho, and I hate that I did. But I couldn’t see any other way out of it. I hurt you because I was cowardly and didn’t want to be selfish by telling you and having your attention move off of Ahra, when I was really being selfish by not telling you and hurting you in the end.” More tears escape my eyes as we look at each other.

“Princess, no…” He cups my face with his hands and uses his thumbs to wipe away my tears. “I’ll admit, it did hurt when you told me that you were leaving the day of, but I understood where you were coming from. Because you were right, I would have done something crazy to keep you by my side. Do you know why?” He asks, and I shake my head, still crying. “Because I need you by my side, kitten, even when I was dating Ahra I felt off but just didn’t pay any mind to it because I had her. But now I know it’s because you and I were drifting apart, I found out when after you left and me and Ahra broke up because I felt empty. I couldn’t text you to just come over anymore because you’re farther away from me now. I lied earlier, I said that I sent out some applications for jobs but didn’t get any answers yet, right?” I nod. “I got offered a job as a software engineer, here, in Itaewon, and I said yes.” 

“Why?” I whisper.

“Because I want to be near you, I need to be by your side Y/n, because I love you.” I let out a sob at his confession and he coos, bringing me to rest my head on his chest and rubbing his hands on my back and running them through my hair. 

“I love you too.” I say after a few minutes. 

Minho brings me out of his hold, and cups my face again. For the first time, he kisses me. His lips brush over mine before deepening the kiss, taking full charge of it yet somehow still being soft with me. His kisses were nothing short of addicting, and I knew I’d be in love with him for a long time. 

In that moment, kissing the man of my dreams, I remember that it may be rare that a second lead gets their own happy ending, but it’s not unheard of. Sometimes the main lead and second lead do end up with their own happily ever after. 

Notes from the author: I have FINALLY posted something y’all 😂 took a few months but she’s here, and she’s dishing out something at least. I don’t know how often I’ll be posting again, esp with school and whatnot, but I do know I need to drain out my drafts because phew, it’s getting a little full in there. 

But anyways, I hope you enjoyed this fic! I’m pretty sure it’s one of the longest I’ve written if not the longest. Hopefully it wasn’t too bad, I’m probably a little rusty but we can fix that (i think)

if you want more I still have my old stuff up on my masterlist on my account! hope to see you around :))

-nyx

[levisgirll]

what would life with levi be like post 139?

𝐀𝐎𝐓 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 - 𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢 𝐀𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧(𝟐)

𝙃𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣 ♡♡♡

warning: mention of some spoilers about levi but not major ones as I wont be going in depth about ch 139.

A lot of really cute fluff that I’m sure will warm your heart-

Thanks for sending a question! I'm glad I got another one and ngl this is actually fun to discuss and share my thoughts and ideas with you all :,) I am guessing you are asking about what life y/n would be with Levi after the war and ch. 139 correct?

To be honest, the first thing that comes to mind is that Levi would be actually more relaxed, soft, and happier especially if he is with y/n. After losing some of his comrades, y/n there being by his side would literally make him sometimes during night go emotional and get really clingy to you and he would be extra affectionate and loving. He wants to feel your presence, wants to know you are still there during the night, and wants to definitely hold you. So y/n living with Levi, expect to have some emotional midnights with him and I feel like it would be really deep and he would share his thoughts or maybe talk it out and then he would go on and say he is thankful you are here, by his side and that he would say "Just remember, you mean a lot to me, Y/N. Don't forget that." He has a hard time trying to find the right words to express how much you mean to him but you would get the message either way from his actions and body language. Also, during those nights, he would want a shoulder to cry on and probably just hold on to you and sob a bit on your shoulder (covering his face) because after the war and he has finished serving his duty, he would think about the past and all the people he cared about and his old close comrades and friends, and since Levi is emotional he would just would want y/n to remind him that you are here and you would make him feel so special just by being by his side! hugging him, letting him speak what is in his mind, accept what has happened, and especially showing him love since this man is a bit hesitant and he would want you to do it.

Another thing I think would be like for y/n living with Levi is that to expect a lot of, sight seeing, exploring new places, he would definitely wake you up so damn early to go for this nice café and that they sell fresh baked pastries and he would get bread with you on the way back, holding your hand and keeping you really close to him. When his legs heals, expect also walking in big open green fields, and even hiking! He would only do this with y/n and if they are there and when you both went there, you realized he was really loving to you, and cared for you through his actions asking if you were okay, if you were having a good time with him and....if you were even happy with him! "Are you....happy staying with someone like me?". It breaks Y/N to hear this from him and I think after the war and everything, he would sometimes look down on himself and probably feel self conscious about his scars on his face and he thinks he is 'uglier'. You are now the one who would shut him up even if he says negative things about himself. "Do you think I-" before he even tried to finish his sentence, y/n would go and cover his mouth with their hand. "If you say it one more time, I'm going to smooch your whole face to shut you up." He would then actually laugh every time you do that and finds you adorable, and proceeds to kiss you on the lips, "I love you." He would say that so sweetly, deep and full of emotions while his eyes looking at you filled with love and lust and he would just say that so suddenly and he has been doing that quite often after you started living your life with Levi after the war and it makes you get butterflies every time (also you both are blushing like hell!) He would ask you when he is self conscious if he still looked attractive to you (this is usually when you recently got close with the other neighbors and they loved you and Levi and he would look at the young man talking to his partner, and seeing his face with no scars. He would think that y/n deserved a more better looking guy sometimes) and he would say that he wished he had his other eye to see you more clearly because you become even more beautiful to him and wants to grasp every time he looks at you really clearly, so when you go out he still thinks of you.

He would have a car and he would be pretty good at driving and he would want to take you to the places he would search up and he would literally plan the day the next day without you knowing. so expect surprise trips too! But, he wouldn't want to use his car to be honest and instead using the train for long rides! That's because, he would want his partner to be near him, let them lay on his shoulder or even lap, prepare some sandwiches for y/n and gives it to them just to see them eating the sandwich happily and he finds it really cute. Basically, he wants every interaction with you no matter what.

It would be a simple, but such a loving, warm-hearted, affectionate and basic romantic life that you both would be sooo loved and really happy together <3 he would want to make you laugh every time and he would start laughing too, would take care of you a lot, mentally, physically too even though you always told him you would do some chores instead but he insists "No love, you did enough. Just rest up for today. let me do it okay? And after this I'm taking you out." Also, he would still worry about you a lot and be protective. SO when you go out, he would still message you and wait for you and he get sad when he can't tag along. Once he didn't reply for 30 mins and he was ready to interrogate everyone to find his partner.

I feel like Levi would brag about you quite often to people he would see and talk to, such as you and Levi's neighbors and he would see them in the supermarket early morning (in some mornings you wont be with him cause you were so tired and he gave up and let you sleep in and went instead). He would be buying a bouquet of flowers (he does that every once a while) for you to surprise you when he is back and he would see his neighbors and he would literally talk so highly of y/n, and say such loving things. "Oh Levi, you actually really love Y/N. They are lucky to have you!" and he would stay slight and think. "It's me who is lucky. my whole life I have been unlucky after everything I went through, but meeting y/n. they changed my life and turned it to a better way. they understand me and love me. I love them so much....I don't want them to leave yet." He would say to them and they would encourage him to say it to you but he is kind of shy. SO! he decided to write it in a letter he was secretly hiding it from you and giving it to you for your next anniversary <3 Would defiantly learn how to bake for you, cook new things every week, buy new books that reminds him of you and read it and then he would talk to you about it for hours while drinking tea with him, would take you to shopping and buy you clothes that you would like. and behind closed doors, he wont miss a chance not to show you love, he would hug your waist from behind for soo long (its his favorite) and keeps his head on your shoulder and breathe in your beautiful scent and kiss your skin gently. "Y/N. please, just stay here for another 5 minutes." That 5 minutes was half an hour of smooching and cuddling in the coach and with some hickeys he would leave you on your shoulder (and he lowkey would want you to give him one too- and he would just give you that look saying as if he would want one right now or he wont let you go. so like I said before, clingy soft man? yes. defiantly after everything and since nothing is in his way he would do this and now you can clearly see his loving and soft side that he gives you daily.) Following that, you both would spend the evening, at the balcony, stargazing and he would look at you instead of the stars, while giving a small smile and placing his hand on the side of his cheek. That's because he really thought you were the star, sunlight and bright flower that blooms beautifully which is filled with love and happiness.

Finally, I feel like he would probably be less grumpy and not showing much of his usual stoic expression but instead, his expression would show he is finally relaxed, calm and actually happy inside because living his life with y/n after the war really helped him and made him realize that this. this is how love and life felt like, living with your true soulmate, the connection, emotions you both would share, feelings understood without being explained much, such strong emotional attraction and you were the perfect person to him. this is what changes him and makes him the most soft man out there that if the people from the survey crops where alive such as Erwin and etc. they would be shocked but extremely proud and happy of him because he really deserves it.

I hope this answered your question and this is what I would guess! Anyways, this really warmed my heart answering this and ahhh just imagine this all like, how beautiful and amazing that is? I just wish we all could give Levi a hug. He really is a great man. please feel free to send another question or anyone out there who has one! I hope you and everyone has a good day and let me know if you liked this by leaving a message anywhere, like or a reblog 🥺 ♡ ♡

[spidercakes]

A/B/O somnophilia AU in which alpha!Tony absolutely rails omega!Peter.

Warnings: age difference (Peter is in his early 20′s and Tony is in his late 30′3/ early 40′s- imagine whatever you like lol), dub con (somnophilia), rough sex, A/B/O, Very Strong Dom/sub vibes, fem!Peter.

*

Tony wakes up with Peter curled up in front of him, his back against Tony’s chest. In his sleep he’d leaned in, face buried in the crook of Peter’s neck where it connects with his shoulder and he kisses it lightly as he stretches out some, careful not to disturb Peter. The dorm room bed is awful, but its exam week and Peter is sort of tethered to campus at the moment, and Tony’s not an ass, its not like he’ll die in this bed. He’ll just feel like he wants to in the morning.

Peter makes a soft noise in his sleep, wiggling his ass directly into Tony’s dick. He chokes on his gasp, hand grabbing Peter’s hip as he presses his forehead to Peter’s bare shoulder, exposed by his shirt slipping down. It wouldn’t be so bad, he thinks, if not for the fact that Peter had admitted, rather shyly, that he’s always been curious about sleep sex and Tony never would have guessed that Peter would share that particular kink. To be fair Peter seemed surprised that he was so into it, but somnophilia happens to be at the top of the list of things he’s into.

Its more of a bad habit he’s developed, sliding his hand up Peter’s thigh and under the too big sleep shirt he’s wearing, but this is the first time he’s found what he was looking for. He moans softly into Peter’s shoulder, considering the possibility that this is some kind of fluke, but they’ve discussed it before. Several times. But then its Peter’s normal habit to sleep without underwear anyway, the fact that he’s slept with them on is weird and- he’s overthinking it. Peter isn’t stupid, and he might be stressed but he’s never really been forgetful- he highly doubts Peter just forgot the time he’d mentioned the easiest consent mechanism for somnophilia. Underwear, no. No underwear, yes.

“Fuck,” he whispers, kissing Peter’s shoulder, continuing his path until his teeth are grazing his neck. Peter makes another small, soft noise in his sleep and Tony can feel his cock twitch, getting hard fast now that he knows what Peter is offering. “Bet you’re already wet for me,” Tony murmurs, reaching down and feeling himself through his flannel pajama pants for a moment before he reaches out and slides Peter’s shirt up over his hips. His ass is gorgeous, and when Tony shifts Peter’s leg to the side to give him better access to his hole Peter cooperates, moving a little and resettling himself with one leg hitched up, hips and ass still pointed in Tony’s direction.

So fucking perfect, just like always. He slides his hand over Peter’s ass, gripping one cheek and spreading him open, cock twitching again when he finds exactly what he thought it would. He lets go of Peter’s ass, leaning in and scenting him as he grabs his hip, rutting his mostly hard cock along his ass and moaning when he smells how fucking hot Peter must be for it. Arousal is practically falling off him in waves, even asleep, and Tony can’t hold back anymore. He doesn’t bother taking his pants off, he just pulls the waistband under his cock and balls before leaning back in and rubbing himself against Peter without anything in the way.

Peter, ever so cooperative, tilts his hips back into Tony’s. He laughs softly, “that’s right baby, give me that pretty little hole,” he murmurs, feeling at Peter’s wet hole for a moment before he pulls back to jerk himself off. Peter looks fucking delicious laid out in front of him, horny and wet for Tony and he isn’t even awake. The small, desperate noise he lets out as rubs his cock between Peter’s cheeks, catching the rim of his wet hole really can’t be helped. He feels so fucking good against Tony’s cock, slick already starting to get messy as Tony   uses his cock to play with Peter’s hole.

It sucks his head in greedily, gripping him tightly and Tony lets out a choked moan as he pulls himself back out, rubbing his cock against Peter’s hole for a moment before sliding back in. His moan is louder this time, nose buried in Peter’s neck as he scents him, sliding himself in deeper as he begins to move slowly at first, but his patience doesn’t last very long. He’s wanted Peter to let him do this since the moment they met, and he brought it up over a month ago. Its been fucking torture knowing Peter wants this as much as he does, and he can’t help the way he buries himself inside Peter.

The sound of Peter’s slick makes him harder as he moves, grabbing Peter’s hip as he settles himself between his legs, pinning him down as he fucks into him enthusiastically. It doesn’t take long for Peter to wake up moaning, hand flying back and settling over Tony’s on his hip as he grinds his ass back onto his cock. “That’s it baby, show me how much you like my cock,” Tony tells him roughly, teeth harshly biting at Peter’s neck.

“Fuck,” Peter all but yells, back arching as he grinds himself back onto Tony again, wiggling his ass as he pants loudly. “Oh my god Tony please,” he says desperately, gasping as Tony pulls his hand out from under Peter’s, grabbing his wrist and pinning it above his head.

“Fucking take it,” Tony basically growls, “you make my cock feel so fucking good,” he adds, biting at Peter’s shoulder roughly. 

The sharp yelp Peter lets out as his hips involuntarily tip up to take Tony in further encourages him, grip on Peter’s wrist tight as he takes what he wants. Peter is so good, so fucking good as Tony fucks him hard and rough, bed shaking enough that Tony might wonder about its structural integrity if he were in the right state of mind.

“Please, Tony,” Peter begs, voice high and desperate with arousal, moaning loudly when Tony lets go of his wrist and wraps his hand around the back of Peter’s neck instead, pushing him hard into the mattress as he fucks into Peter deep. Tony watches his cock move in and out of Peter’s hole, slick dripping down his thighs he’s so wet and he knows he has to knot him.

He smacks Peter’s ass hard with his free hand, moaning as potent scent of horny omega drives him closer to the edge. “Gunna knot that pretty little ass of yours, make sure you know who owns it,” he tells Peter, fucking into him fast.

“Yes,” Peter breathes out softly, “need it Tony, please,” he adds between all these hot little noises he keeps making.

“Mmm not gunna last much longer, sluttly little hole is so god damn tight on me baby, make me want you so fucking bad,” Tony tells him, leaning in and biting at Peter’s shoulder before resting his head against it as he pumps himself in and out of Peter’s hole, mouth dropped open in pleasure because this might be the best Peter has ever felt.

The way Peter feels when he wiggles underneath him is divine, “oh my god I’m cumming, I’m cumming Tony ah-” Peter’s voice is muffled due to being pressed into his pillow and Tony can fucking hold back knowing Peter came on nothing but his cock.

“Fuck yes, baby, s’what you’re fucking made for,” Tony tells him, knot swelling in Peter’s ass, helped along by Peter grinding back onto it panting like he can’t get enough even after cumming. It takes a few minutes of him rocking gently into Peter for him to calm down enough to let Peter up, scenting at his neck immediately and making a pleased noise when Peter immediately tilts his head to the side for him. 

“Mm, thanks,” Peter murmurs, moaning softly as Tony’s teeth graze his neck.

Tony laughs, nipping at Peter’s neck again just because it feels so damn good when Peter’s muscles clench down on his knot, “my pleasure.” Like it’s a hardship to fuck Peter on the best of days let alone when he’s been handed his favorite kink on a platter. As a reward he sucks lightly at the sensitive skin on Peter’s neck, biting at the spot before sucking at it again, intent on leaving a mark.

The soft noises Peter makes as Tony continues to stuck marks into his skin encourage him, making him moan as he rocks into Peter. The knock on the door, however, does not.

*

He sits with his head in his hand, embarrassed. “I can’t believe i had the campus cops called on me,” Tony says.

Rhodey doesn’t even look up from his newspaper, flipping the page casually even though Tony damn well knows he’s not reading it. He’s just a dramatic bitch. “That’s what you get for cradle robbing,” he says, shrugging.

He sputters, betrayed by Rhodey so he turns to Nat, who grins. “I don’t feel bad for you either but only because its funny,” she says.

“Someone thought I assaulted Peter, that is so not funny,” he tells her. In their defense, when he’d played that back over without knowledge of what was going on he guesses that whole thing did sound pretty suspect but still.

He looks to Pepper, his last resort and he knows he’s going to get dropped on his ass but he’s still got hope. “Don’t even,” Rhodey tells him, still not looking up from the paper he isn’t reading. “She has common sense so she’s on my side.”

Tony turns back to Pepper, who pauses long enough for Rhodey to look up at her, giving her a suspicious look. “To be fair, Tony and I had that happen once when we were together and it was awful I’m so sorry you managed to do that twice,” Pepper tells him.

Vindicated he stands up, “ha!” he says to Rhodey, who is staring between him and Pepper like he’s just been told that they’re aliens, and they know because bees.

“Wait, what the fuck am I missing you two had what happen to you?” he asks.

“To be fair,” Tony says, “i completely forgot about the time I got the campus cops called on me with Pepper.”

[osakaso5]

IDOLiSH7 6th Anniversary Special Story: Full of Heart...

Chapter 3: Eternal Memories

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6

Riku Nanase: Ah, I was planning to use this picture, too! Here, look.

Tenn Kujo: Good thing we set up this meeting, then.

Iori Izumi: It's all thanks to my guidance. The two of you should be grateful.

Tenn & Riku: Thank you.

Iori Izumi: Still, I can't believe you'd both choose the exact same photo, out of all the ones you have.

Iori Izumi: Was it just a coincidence? Or do you have some kind of twin superpowers?

Tenn Kujo: I wouldn't exactly call it a superpower, but we have always had a tendency to pick the same things.

Riku Nanase: Yeah! Like at a restaurant, we'd always order the same thing.

Iori Izumi: Perhaps it's not as unusual for you to have matching tastes and interests as I made it out to be, considering you were raised together.

Tenn & Riku: Right.

Iori Izumi: Which park is this? Do you remember where it is?

Tenn Kujo: Near our old house. We went there for a picnic, since Riku was feeling well that day.

Riku Nanase: We brought canteens and lunchboxes. It wasn't our first visit to that park, but eating lunch there made it feel like an adventure.

Tenn Kujo: You have a nice smile in this picture, Riku. Why don't you use this one? I can pick something else.

Riku Nanase: Are you sure? I think you look really cute here too, Tenn-nii. You've got this kind of composed look on your face.

Riku Nanase: I think your fans would be happy to see you like this.

Tenn Kujo: And your fans would like to see the way you look here, too. Hmm, this is a tough decision.

Tenn Kujo: Your thoughts, Iori Izumi?

Iori Izumi: You're asking me?

Tenn Kujo: I thought I'd leave this up to outside judgement.

Riku Nanase: Which one of us do you think should use this picture for the show?

Iori Izumi: ......... Nanase-san.

Riku Nanase: Oh! How come?

Iori Izumi: Because we might not have the time to reach out to Kujo-san a second time if you're the one who needs to reselect his picture.

Iori Izumi: I trust in his ability to choose an appropriate photo much more than I trust yours.

Tenn Kujo: Makes sense.

Riku Nanase: So it has nothing to do with the photo itself?

Iori Izumi: Although if you select something from the pictures we looked at last night, perhaps Kujo-san could also use this one.

Iori Izumi: Why not the one you showed me, where your face is covered in ketchup...

Riku Nanase: The one where I'm eating omurice?

Iori Izumi: Yes. You looked so innocent and cu... Ahem. I just thought it would make for a good conversation piece.

Riku Nanase: I guess I'll go with that one, then!

Tenn Kujo: What about your picture, Iori Izumi? Which one did you pick?

Iori Izumi: ........ Mine is... nothing unusual... Just a perfectly normal childhood picture...

Tenn Kujo: Based on your reluctance to go into any more detail, I highly doubt that.

Riku Nanase: We can show you! Apparently Mitsuki chose the picture, and Iori looks totally adorable in it!

Iori Izumi: ........ It... It really isn't anything worth showing to people...

Tenn Kujo: It's not worth showing to people, so you decided to display it on national television?

Riku Nanase: C'mon, Iori. Even Tenn-nii wants to see it!

Tenn Kujo: Pretty please.

Iori Izumi: Please stop it with the innocent act...

Iori Izumi: ...Fine. Here it is, since you insist...

Tenn Kujo: Wow, you look cute. A plushie in your arms, a happy little smile on your face...

Riku Nanase: Isn't it precious!?

Iori Izumi: That's enough. I don't need your flattery...

Riku Nanase: We're not just saying that, you know! I even wanted to pretend like I was the one that gave you that plushie.

Iori Izumi: I don't know why you feel this much of a need to usurp your twin.

Riku Nanase: I mean it! There's not a single person who wouldn't be happy if their present was received like how you received that plushie.

Riku Nanase: God, Santa Claus, whoever. I think it'd make just about anyone feel on top of the world.

Iori Izumi: You're the one who's always smiling like that, anyway.

Riku Nanase: Huh?

Iori Izumi: Nothing. I was just thinking out loud.

Iori Izumi: Still, not even I expected my younger self to smile so earnestly.

Tenn Kujo: What made you look so sour all the time?

Iori Izumi: I don't look like this all the time. Just very often, especially around your younger brother.

Tenn Kujo: I don't know. You seem to give me plenty of sour looks, too.

Iori Izumi: Only when the cameras are off and you're acting like your usual, standoffish self.

Tenn Kujo: I'm not standoffish. I just take things seriously.

Tenn Kujo: So, how old were you exactly? When you stopped sleeping with this cutesy teddy bear, I mean.

Iori Izumi: ...How do you know I used to sleep with it!? Did my brother tell you?

Tenn Kujo: Most little kids like to sleep with a stuffed toy or two. Especially one that looks this fluffy.

Iori Izumi: I did enjoy that, myself...

Tenn Kujo: Riku never could've done that, though. His selection of bedtime toys was limited, so he didn't have attacks at night.

Riku Nanase: True.

Iori Izumi: Ah... I see... And you even seem like you'd have enjoyed these kind of fluffy toys...

Riku Nanase: Are you sure you're not just talking about yourself..?

Tenn Kujo: Riku. Were you lonely without plushies to keep you company?

Riku Nanase: Of course not. I had you, Tenn-nii.

Riku Nanase: I never felt lonely, even though I never got to go to school, or pet any cats or dogs.

Riku Nanase: When you were around, I was always happy and having fun. And I'm really grateful for that.

Tenn Kujo: Riku...

Riku & Iori: Tenn-nii...

Tenn & Riku: ........!?

Riku Nanase: W-what was that!? Why did you call him Tenn-nii, too!?

Iori Izumi: Because I knew that's what you were going to say. What do you think of my ability to predict you?

Tenn Kujo: You can be very strange, for someone so smart.

Iori Izumi: I could say the same about you. Don't you think you're being unusually soft on Nanase-san today?

Tenn Kujo: I guess so... I guess nostalgia's gotten the best of me.

Tenn Kujo: That'll happen when you reminisce about your childhood.

Riku Nanase: Maybe... I should just stick one of our childhood pictures on my face all the time...

Iori Izumi: You're an idol, so please don't start trying to censor your own face.

Riku Nanase: But I want Tenn-nii to be nice to me!

Iori Izumi: Of course yo do... Ah, by the way. Are you sure that picture you showed me at the dorm wouldn't be the best pick for you?

Iori Izumi: You know, the one where you're holding a Rabitty-kun doll. I think it'd work nicely, especially from a sponsor standpoint.

Riku Nanase: Yeah, maybe!

Tenn Kujo: I'm glad Rabitty-kun made a comeback. Toi Toi Toi was on the verge of bankruptcy before then.

Riku Nanase: They were?

Tenn Kujo: Yep. They released some low quality Rabitty-kun products, and were dealing with tons of customer complaints.

Tenn Kujo: It was damaging enough to their reputation that they had to sell the main office building and the CEO's house.

Iori Izumi: I see... I think the Rabitty-kun we had might've been one of the defective ones.

Iori Izumi: It made strange noises sometimes...

Riku Nanase: Yeah, I can kind of see why people would complain about their children's toys making creepy noises. They probably made lots of kids cry.

Iori Izumi: Still, it's incredible that they were able to bounce back and resume sales six years ago.

Riku Nanase: Wow... That company's sure had some big ups and downs.

Riku Nanase: Kind of like us!

Iori Izumi: Right... I do hope we can help them have a good anniversary.

Tenn Kujo: Yeah.

Iori Izumi: What sort of games did you two play when you were little?

Tenn Kujo: We played normally enough. Drawing, card games, things like that.

Riku Nanase: I couldn't get out of bed or move around much, so Tenn-nii would sing and dance for me.

Riku Nanase: We came up with lots of games where I sat still, while he moved around.

Riku Nanase: Like the Tenn-nii Robot!

Iori Izumi: The "Tenn-nii Robot"?

Tenn Kujo: Ah, I remember that one.

Iori Izumi: What kind of game was it?

Riku Nanase: I used this controller we made out of milk cartons to order Tenn-nii around.

Riku Nanase: And he'd do as I told him to. It was a lot of fun!

Tenn Kujo: Sure was.

Riku Nanase: Tenn-nii Robot, fire missiles!

Tenn Kujo: Boom!

Riku Nanase: Tenn-nii Robot, fire your machine gun!

Tenn Kujo: Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat.

Riku Nanase: Tenn-nii Robot, equip your lazer sword!

Tenn Kujo: Kwishuuuu, clink!

Tenn & Riku: It was so much fun!

Iori Izumi: Kujo-san...

Tenn Kujo: What?

Iori Izumi: You taught an innocent young child the joys of having Tenn Kujo at his beck and call? That should be a criminal offense.

Tenn Kujo: What are you talking about..?

Iori Izumi: You're exactly the reason why Nanase-san grew up to be so inhumanly naive and spoiled.

Tenn Kujo: Are you spoiled, Riku?

Riku Nanase: No! Hey, Iori..! Since when am I spoiled!?

Iori Izumi: Do you really have to ask? Today, you slept in so late that I had to help you pack.

Riku Nanase: How is that spoiled!? I just asked you for help! And you agreed to help me with my clothes, too!

Iori Izumi: I was worried we'd be even more late if I let you try and fail to decide on what to wear. You have no right to complain here.

Riku Nanase: I guess not, but...

Tenn Kujo: So, Iori Izumi's your stylist for today.

Riku Nanase: Do I look good?

Tenn Kujo: Sure.

Riku Nanase: Ehehe! You hear that, Iori!?

Iori Izumi: Of course you look good, with a producer like me. You should have more self-confidence.

Tenn Kujo: You two sure are close.

Riku Nanase: Yeah, we are!

Iori Izumi: How, exactly?

Riku Nanase: There you go again. Tenn-nii Robot, attack Iori!

Tenn Kujo: Kwishuuuu, clink...  

Iori Izumi: Urgh..! ...Please, do NOT try to stab me!

Tenn Kujo: Beep beep beep. Mission complete.

Iori Izumi: You of all people should know better than to indulge him!

Riku Nanase: Ahahaha! 

To be continued...

[nat-20s]

Part 3 of Wonderful! Au. it’s..very tonally different than the rest of the au, much more melancholy and also is only Martin speaking, but basically I just wanted to address that this IS still post canon and they’ll always be in the process of healing, you know? ANYWAY here goes:

~*~

Martin:

Hey everyone, I wanted to started this off by saying this isn’t going to be a typical episode. Jon’s been..under the weather for the past couple of days, so this is just going to be me monologing, inevitably for a much shorter time than we usually go. Most of the time, we try to discuss topics and experiences that, if not universal, could theoretically be enjoyed by anyone, such as fresh honey or the first time a friend comes to visit your home.

This episode will not be that. This episode is highly specific to me, and will only contain one wonderful thing, though in reality it is a thousand wonderful things wrapped into one. In order to be completely transparent, this episode isn’t even really for the general public, and while the whole show has on some level been for the two of us, this episode in particular exemplifies that. If that doesn’t sound like something you’d enjoy, feel free to skip this, and we’ll most likely be back to our regular format and hijinks next week.

If you’re still listening, and you find this grating or obnoxious or self indulgent in any way, well, I can only say that I warned you.

My first, and only, wonderful thing this week is Jonathan Blackwood-Sims; my husband, my best friend, and my love of this, and I suspect many other, lives.

My dearest Jon,

I think you are wonderful.

I hope that you think I am wonderful even half as much as I think you are wonderful, but as I think you are infinitely wonderful, and half of infinity is still infinity, I know that this is quite a lot to ask.

I think you are wonderful when you are talking to our cats, and singing during chores, and smiling against my shoulder. I think you are wonderful when a sunbeam hits your face and you sway into it and it’s the most at peace I’ve ever seen you, and I am so grateful every time to have gotten this. I think you are wonderful when you are not a morning person, but you rise at the same time I do, for at least a moment, to kiss my hand and wish me a good morning. I think you are wonderful when I am not a night person, but I stay up later than I should to wish you a good night. I think you are wonderful when you’re telling me about your Interest of the Day, when you are rambling to me about nothing at all, and when you don’t say a word but still speak volumes. I think you are wonderful when you exist near me. I think you are wonderful when you exist away from me as well, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t prefer having you close by, even in those times where one of us needs space. I think you’re wonderful when you exist anywhere at all.

I think you are wonderful when you are intelligent. I think you are wonderful when you are compassionate. I think you are wonderful when you are both at once, more than that, I think you’re dazzling. I think you are wonderful when you care so, so much, when others would’ve stopped.

I think you are wonderful when you are warm. I think you are wonderful when you are warm and loving and affectionate and playful and teasing and kind. I think you are wonderful when you are good, and you are so very good.

But make no mistake, my love. I do not only find you wonderful during times of joy. I do not only find you wonderful when you are good. I do not only find you wonderful when wonder comes easily, when scars seem faded and the triumphs seem common.

I think you are wonderful when nothing else is.

I think you are wonderful when, in many ways, you are not. I think you are wonderful when you’re bitter, you’re guilty, when you’re arrogant or self centered or dismissive or self sacrificing.

I think you are wonderful when, in many ways, I am not. I think you are wonderful when I’m cold, I’m distant, when I’m needy or jealous or spiteful or, admittedly, also self sacrificing.

I think you are wonderful when we’ve betrayed each other, when we’ve fought, when we’ve gone to sleep angry and we’ve woken up afraid. I think you are wonderful when I can’t wash off long removed bloodstains on my hands, and when you can’t tear away long removed violence from your throat.

I think you are wonderful when you are hurting and haunted. I think you are wonderful when I’m much the same. I think you are wonderful when I wish that neither of us had to be hurting and haunted again.

I know that there are wounds that won’t ever fully close, aches that will flare up on days such as these. But I also know that there are joys that can never be removed, certain laughs that will be irrepressible on days to come. Both will stay with us the rest of our lives.

I know we have regrets, but I can never regret staying the rest of my life with someone as wonderful as you.

[cuquitalocita]

i love you yeah yeah yeah |rowaelin month- day 3|

rowaelin masterlist 

an: i’m not gonna lie, i had so so much fun writing this one! i’m a tennis player and my sister is as well, therefore why i know so much about the junior pro league. for those of you who don’t know, the orange bowl is an actual tournament played internationally for juniors and i’m ranting wow so anyway i hope this isn’t too tennis vocab-y :)

word count: 3,876

~~

It’s the final two days before competition at the International Orange Bowl this year being held in Terrasen and it’s no surprise that tensions between players and academies are more than high. We’re so glad to be here for yet another year of thrilling competition in which the winners will automatically be placed into the first round of the U.S. Open. I, for one, and more than excited to see some new teen faces this year, what about you, Gavriel?

You know Cairn, I completely agree and as someone from Terrasen, you must be more than excited to see some friendly competition on your home turf.

Oh, I sure am excited, but I don’t know if you’d call this competition exactly ‘friendly.’ For those of you unaware, the rivalry between the TAT (Tennis Academy of Terrasen) and the DTC (Doranelle Tennis Center) has been going on for close to ten years now, beginning all the way back to when founders Maeve Vesta and Evalin Galathynius were in college, rivals through and through. Now adults, their children carry on their competitive legacy, taking the nation by storm. If you see the final match of any tournament, you can bet your money it’s a Doranelle kid and a Terrasen kid. 

The stakes sure are high during this tournament, as it isn’t closed, like the academies’ usual ones. Instead, anyone player eighteen years old and younger with the qualifying points was eligible to register. I’m looking forward to seeing some new faces this year. 

Me too, but you can never go wrong with the usual suspects. This year, my money is on eighteen year- old Rowan Whitethorn from Doranelle, ranked second in the country, in the men’s finals. As Maeve’s nephew, Rowan has been put in the spotlight for most of his life, not to mention taking a clear leadership role among the DTC alongside Lorcan Salvaterre. 

That’s a good point, Gavriel, in the past years Rowan has made it to at least the quarter-finals but has always lost before he can truly do. I have a feeling the kid has a lot more in him.  And as for the women, I wouldn’t be too surprised to see the Terrasen seventeen year- old cruising through a few rounds before her tough competition starts. We can’t expect anything less than Evalin Galathynius’ daughter, right?

I for one, am more than excited for pre- first-round interviews. It’s always quite interesting to see each players’ mindset before they set out for blood.

~~

“What do you think our favorite golden girl has in store for us this year, Gavriel? Something tells me she’s a little more than annoyed given what happened at the finals of the last international tournament held in Terassen when Remelle Frost from the Doranelle academy beat her in what was the biggest upset of the season.”

Aelin rolled her eyes and glared at the back of her mother’s seat, the woman in question frowning as the annoying voice of Cairn Rossa rang through the rental car. She reached forward to turn the station off just as Gavriel’s voice rang out once more.

“Let’s not beat around the bush here, Cairn,” the older man was responding. “I’ve been doing this just a bit longer than you enough to know when a player isn’t themselves. One loss isn’t the definition of a player the same way one win isn’t either. I suggest both teams- including Aelin and Remelle themselves- step onto the court, and play.” 

Aelin let out a satisfied huff. She knew she had always liked Gavriel. Aelin liked that the man looked at the players as more than just players in a video game or statistics on a screen. As a former player himself, Aelin knew the man understood the game in and out and was more than qualified to report during the national tournaments, no matter where he was born and what side he was essentially placed on. 

The station was snapped off as her mother’s finger found the correct button, earning an annoyed glare from the Uber driver next to her that she promptly ignored in favor of turning back to her daughter, opening her mouth to say something. Aelin’s own eyes stared back at her before shifting down to the phone she held in her hand. It had just buzzed signaling a new notification that had her mother lifting her brows. 

Aelin immediately shifted forward in an attempt to look over her mother’s should before her hand was on her face, batting her daughter away with a motherly ‘leave me alone’ look. She relented, leaning back into her seat with slumped shoulders. Finally, her mother huffed but remained with her back facing Aelin. 

She knew it was different this year, she could practically feel it in the air. Without her father with the two women in the car, the tournament atmosphere was a different universe. 

It was getting dark outside, the sun setting behind them as they drove through the dazzling city. The car came to an abrupt stop in front of the hotel that sent Aelin jerking out of her own thoughts. Her mother turned back to her with a sad knowing smile and patted her daughter’s knee.

“We’re here. Try to get some sleep- you have a long day tomorrow.”

~~

“What’s the plan for today?” Aelin asked her mother around a mouthful of bagel the next morning. It wasn’t every day the founder of the University came to watch her players in a tournament, but whoever won this won would be fed into the first round of an official professional tournament. It would be amazing PR for the academy, Aelin knew, but she also knew her mother felt bad that her father had escorted Aelin to all of her tournaments in prior years. And now that he wasn’t here anymore… 

“Eat up- after you’re done I’ve reserved three courts at the complex and we’ll get together with everyone.” ‘Everyone’ being every other players from the academy who had enough points to enter the qualifiers. Not all of them were as highly ranked as Aelin, but she found it helpful to train with them all the same. They were her friends. “We do need to pick Lysandra up from the airport first though,” she said as she frowned at her phone. “Her flight was supposed to have landed a few minutes ago but she hasn’t reached out…”

Aelin rolled her eyes at her mother, she always did have a thing with protectiveness over her best friend. 

“Mom, don’t worry about it,” Aelin assured her. “Aed said he would pick her up and then meet us at the courts. I wouldn’t want to be in that car if I were you.” She faked a gag, causing her mother to laugh. 

“Alright then. Eat, find your rackets, and take the rental to the courts. It was just delivered this morning. I have some business to finish here at the hotel.” She left Aelin with a kiss to the head. 

~~

It didn’t take long for Aelin to pull up to the familiar yet daunting tennis complex bigger than even the academy, and she pushed the car into park, simply staring for a moment. 

This was it. 

Three years she had come close to winning as the youngest person in history. So close. But this was the year. This was her year. She could do this. She would do this. 

And so Aelin Galathynius pushed her shoulders back and raised her chin as she grabbed her massive tennis bag from the trunk and slung it over her shoulders. The weight was heavy and familiar as she walked through the glass double doors and to the front desk, only to halt in her tracks when she came face to face with a familiar head of silver hair. 

Rowan Whitethorn.

She had quite often mused about how unfair it was that her essential biggest rival was so attractive. It didn’t really make hating him very fair, now did it? But there he stood, green eyes shining and teeth flashing as he snapped something at the young man at the desk. The poor boy looked ready to pee himself and Aelin couldn’t help but release a sharp laugh, causing both Rowan and the blonde next to him to whip around.

Aelin watched as Rowan’s eyes sparked and his mouth curved into a sneer as he took her in from head to toe. She forced herself still and kept her eyes on his face. It was all she could do. Rowan opened his mouth and Aelin prepared her hackles to rise instantly.

“Aelin. Good to see you here.” But it wasn’t Rowan who spoke. No, it was Remelle Frost, her least favorite bottle blonde on the planet that spoke as she curled a possessive hand over Rowan’s bicep. Aelin simply rolled her eyes, never one to beat around the bush. It was common knowledge that the blondes didn’t like each other. And after the Adarlan tournament, Aelin wouldn’t hide her disdain for the girl.

“Wish I could say the same,” she replied dismissively as she shouldered past Rowan and made for the front desk. One charming smile and the boy seemed to handle her much better than Rowan. She gave him her mother’s name, him quickly nodding a confirmation and giving her the court numbers, saying they would be available in just a moment.

She turned around, unsurprised to see Rowan glaring at the back of her head. It had been almost eight years of this rivalry. At least for them. Aelin thought it might’ve been a little ridiculous, considering that it started with her mother and his aunt, but the Doranelle kids just made it so easy to hate them. So easy to want to pound them on and off the court. She wouldn’t apologize for the adrenaline the rivalry provided her with.

Aelin smirked, cocking her hip. “Like what you see?”

“Hardly,” he growled. “Just wondering whether or not you actually came to play this time.” 

Aelin recognized the comment for what it was- a direct jab to the last tournament where she had lost to Remelle. If the comment hadn’t pissed her off so much she would’ve recognized the compliment for what it was. 

“Well, that depends which game you’re talking about, Whitethorn.” Her voice was just teasing enough to annoy him once more, and Aelin’s grin grew. 

“Don’t you have a court to go find?” Remelle cut in from beside Rowan, who had distanced himself from her. Aelin didn’t blame him. She wanted to do the same thing.

“And here I was enjoying our little chat. I’ll see you guys tomorrow, mar sin leat.”

“This isn’t Terrasen,” Remelle hissed. “We say ‘good luck’ here. Gods, you Terrasen kids are pieces of-” 

Someone caught her by the waist as Aelin attempted to throw herself at the girl and she was soon spun around in their arms, coming face to face with her own eyes. Aedion’s were flashing too as his eyes were fixed behind her, no doubt at Rowan. 

“Leave it, Ace, it’s not worth it.” 

“It’s true, princess,” Rowan finally spoke with a sneer. “You’re gonna need those pretty little hands tomorrow. Wouldn’t want you to have an excuse when you get your ass kicked.”  

“Oh, I’ll show you-” 

Aedion dragged her away before she could get another word out, her fists clenched and her teeth bared. She shoved him when he put her down.

“Fucking Doranelle,” Aedion spat under his breath as he shook his head. 

He merely gestured to a figure behind her, causing Aelin to whip around with wide eyes. Shit. Duke Perrington grinned at her through the snake-eyed lens of his camera and gave her a tiny wave as she bared her teeth at him

Perfect. Now it would look like Terrasen had begun a fight before the tournament even began. 

Her mother was going to kill her. 

~~

Aelin felt like the stadium had never been bigger. She had known this year she would be playing where the professionals themselves did, including Maeve and her mother, but never in a million years had it looked so daunting or made her feel so small. 

The tournament had been, well needless to say, easy for Aelin so far. She had breezed through her first few matches, absolutely destroying the poor girls, and her third had been straight sets as well. But now it was the semis. And she would have to face Remelle on center court. It seemed the gods liked playing jokes on Aelin Galathynius. 

She could feel every pair of eyes snap to hers the moment she stepped onto the court but she looked forward. Maybe she was a crowd favorite- but that would do her no favors in the upcoming match. Aelin thought she was going to hurl all over her new shoes and she let the deafening cheering of the audience cover the sound of her pounding heart. 

Remelle walked in not long after she and Aelin met her in the middle of the court, racket in hand. Showtime. 

Aelin might have been paying attention when the coin had been flipped, might have been minimally involved when she called heads or when she won the call and opted to serve first. She might have been only slightly aware of her surroundings as she took a small sip of her water and walked to the back of the court. 

And then it was movement.

It was backward and forwards, side to side, low and high, and it was the same dance Aelin knew better than anything. The same feeling in her feet when she sprinted to the ball and the same stretch of muscles when she reached for a shot. This was who she was- this was the pattern she had lived for ten years. 

But it didn’t seem to matter, not as the score continued to tip less and less in her favor with every passing point. She was playing well- but Remelle was playing better. And there was nothing Aelin could do but survive and ignore the satisfied smirks the other girl would throw her during their side changes. 

Think, Aelin, think. 

Nothing was coming to her head. All she could hear was the pounding adrenaline through her body telling her to play. To cross each bridge when she came to it. There was nothing more she could do than play.

It was then, when Aelin threw herself at a particularly difficult ball, that she felt something shift. And she knew she was screwed. 

Aelin was a tennis player- she had rolled her ankle before. But this was different. It had never hurt this bad. And as the rest of her body came down with her ankle, she thought that it could be it. That it was the end of the match all due to a stupid ankle injury. 

With her heart in her throat, Aelin signaled to the red- headed umpire. 

Injury, she mouthed to her, and the woman- Ansel, it seemed her name was- simply nodded. She was in the massive locker room without a second thought, dragging out a spare bucket of ice held in one of the corners of the room and shoved her foot it. Might as well get it over with.

Aelin winced as the ice on her foot began to take effect and her muscles began to ache, her breathing beginning to lose its consistency. Gods, she hated this. She hated the useless feeling that came over her at the thought of possibly being unable to finish the match. At the thought of all the people, she would be letting down. 

She was tired. Aelin was so, so tired.

Gods, she just needed-

The door to the locker room burst open with a loud and abrupt clang, causing Aelin to jerk forward, spilling water on the ground as she opened her mouth. She was ready to tell them that she needed some privacy before her eyes locked onto a familiar figure that sent her heart pounding for a different reason. 

“Rowan, you can’t be in here!” 

The hulking boy ignored her protests, striding over her in no more than a few steps, both of his hands immediately going to the base of her neck to search her gaze with his own worried one, clearly not caring that he was in the girl’s locker room and would be kicked out of the tournament if he was found. 

“Are you alright?” he insisted, his voice low and hoarse, forest eyes intense.

The gentleness in which he touched her had Aelin sighing and her hands reached up to lightly take hold of his wrists, bringing them down and gathering them in her own hands to hold to her chest. 

She hadn’t meant to fall for Rowan Whitethorn.

But like everything in her life, it had happened quickly and unexpectedly, and Aelin had dealt with it head-on. It had been a year now. An entire year of playing tournaments in each other’s home’s just so they could see each other. Just so no suspicion was be aroused by the tabloids. 

And Aelin hated it. 

All she wanted to do was be able to link her hand through Rowan’s in public without causing a public scandal about a decade-long rivalry. 

“I’m okay, you fussy buzzard,” she teased as she looked at him, pleased to see when the frown on his lips twitched the slightest bit upward. “It was just a little fall. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” 

But because he knew her so well, he had heard the uncertainty and fear in her voice as she spoke. So saying nothing, he pulled Aelin to his chest and allowed his arms to wrap around her completely, enveloping her in the scent that she had considered home for months.

And as she breathed him in, she wished home wasn’t always so godsdamned far. 

Rowan let her breathe shakily into his chest, constantly running a soothing hand up and down her back as he hummed a small melody that he often did to get her to sleep over the phone at night. Aelin was the first person to admit it was much better in person.

“You don’t have to do it, Aelin,” he said finally, his movements never ceasing. “You don’t owe them anything.” 

She knew who he was referring to of course, of the people who had come to watch the new ‘upcoming star’ in action and were expecting to see quite the show. They were the people Aelin had been trained to want to impress. 

Aelin pulled back to tilt her chin up and look him in the eyes. 

“I can’t just quit, Rowan. I won’t.”

“You have nothing to prove, Fireheart.” And Aelin almost broke as he used the nickname her father had. “Not to anyone.” 

She shook her head, helplessness seeping through her body more and more as she looked at the boy in front of her. The pain in her ankle was even worse now. Unsurprisingly, he noticed, and his calloused hands moved to her wrists as he lead her back over to the bucket of ice water.

He kneeled down in front of the bench as she sat down and placed her foot in the water, wincing along with her even after she threw a glare at him.

I don’t see you with a foot in ice.

Seeing you in pain is enough to hurt me, his eyes gazed back playfully. Aelin rolled her eyes, quickly shutting them as another shock of pain rushed through her body, making her inhale sharply. 

Her boyfriend frowned once more, clearly upset he could do nothing to help her. So he gathered her hands in his own, bringing them to his face to place a gentle kiss on them, pulling an unwitting smile from Aelin. 

“I love you,” she said quietly. Rowan met her soft gaze for a moment before Aelin leaned forward, capturing his lips with hers in a kiss she hoped said everything she couldn’t. Thank you, I don’t know what I would do without you. I wish we weren’t a secret. 

“I love you too, Fireheart.” 

She would never get sick of hearing him say that. Of hearing the utter truth in his words. 

Rowan was watching her with that adoring look he reserved only for her, his face open so she could see every emotion playing across his face. It only made her want to kiss him again.

So she did, although this time he met her halfway, taking her chin lightly between two fingers and tilting it up so he could kiss her thoroughly as her hands rested at the base of his neck, lightly twirling the pieces of soft hair she found there.

They sat there for a while, simply kissing, enjoying the feeling of each other’s lips and proximity when it was so few and far between, and Aelin relished in the feeling of loving someone who loved her back. In the feeling of not having to act. 

When she accidentally tugged at a knot in his hair, Rowan pulled away with a painful groan and a nip to her bottom lip, causing Aelin to laugh and push his cheek away with two fingers.

“Sorry, Buzzard,” she laughed as Rowan stood up, with a playful glare. He folded his arms in front of him and it was only then that Aelin remembered she had a foot inside of a bucket of ice. And her medical time out was running out. “Shit. I have to go.” 

Aelin jumped into action, taking her foot out of the ice with a hiss and grabbing a towel as Rowan maneuvered himself around her to find her shoes and socks. Apparently he had understood her message loud and clear about her intentions on forfeiting the match or not- he wasn’t stupid enough to argue with her.

Quickly enough, Aelin was good as new- well, as new as she could be with a half swollen ankle.

“Well,” she dropped her arms to her sides and turned to her boyfriend. “How do I look?”

“Like an idiot who shouldn’t be playing.”

“Or…?” she arched a brow. Rowan sighed and stepped toward her, his hands bracing both of her arms as he leaned forward to press an earnest kiss to her forehead. 

“Or Terrasen’s champion,” he murmured against her skin. 

Aelin grinned, a wicked and feral smile that meant she was ready to raise hell.

“Now that’s more like it.” 

~~

If someone had asked Aelin to regale the crowd with details of her match after she had come out victorious, she would have been unable to do so. Because all she remembered was the pounding of her feet on the ground, and the neon color of the tennis ball, and the feeling of her heart palpitating in her chest. 

Oh, and of course she couldn’t forget the moment after her match- winning shot, when every care and inhibition had left her in one foul swoop. When she had sprinted over to the stands and thrown herself into the arms of the silver- haired enemy, delighting in his deep laughter.. 

And kissed him in the middle of the stadium for all to see.

~~

this prompt was: secret dating 

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