#anyway this has all been a tangent but stressed and hurt in the middle of the night just feels like rain is supposed to be a part of it lol

[blujayonthewing]

what is it about 'pathetic in a nightgown' that demands also being soaking wet

I thought about doing a companion sketch to the zhartook painting of mel having just been attacked in the middle of the night by her best friend and I instinctively pictured her standing in the rain when her campaign setting literally cannot rain

[poisonepel]

School Uniform Story Notes ✨ (1/2)

this is for the people like me who can never remember which story a certain scene you’re trying to find came from 💢 and for anyone else who just wants to know what happened 😭😭

Part 1: Heartslabyul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle, Scarabia Part 2: Pomefiore, Ignihyde, Diasomnia (coming soon!)

Riddle 🌹 There’s No Drawback to Not Knowing

Ace and Cater discuss which phone cases are in style right now; Riddle doesn’t know anything about the latest trends but he’s fine with that because it makes no difference to him. When Ace tries to explain them, Riddle repeats that it’s not important and snaps at them to go somewhere else. Once they leave, he mutters to himself that he’ll look into them later.

They mention that a paper talking about new discoveries in the history of the Land of Hot Sands was published (which affected everyone’s history tests) 👀 I wonder if that involved Jafar at all

Riddle doesn’t check the results of his exams because he knows he always gets 100%

Cater’s phone case is considered trendy right now lmaoo

Ace mentions wanting a phone case design featuring creatures with “fuzzy heads and legs growing out of their eyes” (the momeraths??)

Ace ♥ Such an Honest Freshman

Ace helps Trey carry back groceries from the store, under the guise of wanting a piece of pie with lots of cherries on it in return. Trey suspects that he wants more than just some cherry pie—Ace ends up spilling that he wanted Trey to tell him which topics would be covered on their history tests.

Ace’s brother is 7 years older than him, and used to take him lots of places together 🥺

Trey usually reads or does homework to pass time at the dorm; he didn’t slack off even as a freshman because he knew Riddle would be coming the year after and he didn’t want Riddle to be angry with his grades 😂

Trey used to make sweets for his little siblings when they pestered him for them!! And he’s been helping around his family’s bakery since he was little

Deuce ♠ One With the Wind

Ace can’t decide which club he wants to join since they all sound tempting. Deuce mentions he joined track and field because there was no Magical Wheel club, which gets him started on a tangent about how much he loves those motorcycles and how he can’t believe Ace has never even touched one.

Deuce tried to open a Magical Wheel Lovers Club but Crowley rejected it

When he was little, Deuce used to get Magical Wheel magazines and admire all the models 😂😂

Magical Wheels are fueled by the drivers’ magic power 👀

Deuce loves the high-speed feeling of “becoming one with the wind” (ie. going really fast on a motorcycle, also sprinting and things for track and field)

Cater ♦ The Portrait of Rosalia

Cater tries to get Kalim and Leona to join a party to keep the lonely portrait Rosalia company. The truth is, he just wanted to put Rosalia in a good mood so she’d share what would be on the next history test with him.

Rosalia hangs in the west school building (the rose in the west wing??), near the staff room and has been there for years; she knows stories about magift tournaments from the past.

Cater implies he knows some secrets about Kalim 🤔

Mentions that Leona comes from a ‘ladies first’ culture

Trey ♣ Open Your Mouth

The Queen has a rule saying that if you eat turkey for dinner, you must brush your teeth two times that night. Ace tries to get away with only brushing once, but Trey catches him and asks both him and Deuce to let him smell their breath to make sure they both brushed at least once already; then he apologizes because he used to do that with his little siblings and it became a habit. He proceeds to give them detailed advice about brushing their teeth.

I didn’t like this one lmao it felt kind of pointless

But anyway Trey knows weirdly thorough tooth-brushing techniques, a lot about teeth in general, and has multiple brushes for focusing on different parts of his mouth 🦷

Leona 🦁 I Grew Up Spoiled

Vil needs Leona to take some pictures with him for the school newspaper. Although reluctant at first, he eventually agrees because Vil won’t stop annoying him about it. Before they go to the shoot, Vil notices one of the buttons on Leona’s vest is coming off and offers him his sewing supplies to fix it. But Leona says if he wants it fixed he should just do it himself (also Leona grew up spoiled and doesn’t know how to sew). Vil gets really salty with his attitude and says he’ll only do it because he needs “his props” to look pristine.

They’re both super catty with each other 😂

At one point Vil said the button wasn’t the right one and asked for a different one; Leona handed him a new one and said “Oh btw this is a magic button, it always comes back even if it comes off.” Vil was like “????” and Leona explained sometimes he’ll leave his clothes that lost a button in his room, and he’ll find it later with this button sewed back on again

Vil said it’s probably Ruggie who quietly sews them back on for him 😭😭 but smh Leona just replied “Oh well same deal, it always comes back”

Jack 🐺 I’ll Expose Your Crimes!

Jack smells something weird in the cafeteria and decides to go investigate. The smell first leads him to the Leech twins; he wrestles Floyd for this suspicious briefcase that they have (turns out there was just a beauty serum inside that they were bringing to a customer). Then Jack realizes the smell was actually coming from Epel; he forcibly pulls a container out from Epel’s jacket pocket and finds... several types of onion product in there (Jack hates onions). Epel reveals he’s been hiding the onions because Vil is forcing him to eat really bland food and the onions help give them flavor.

Jack suspected the smell was a chemical leak in the school and his first thought was “I won’t be able to get in today’s workout!!” sir,,,,,

His sense of smell gets immensely better in his wolf form

After they sorted everything out, Epel invited Jack to sit with him for lunch 🥺

Ruggie 🐆 In Grandma’s Hands

Ruggie comes down to the cafeteria in the middle of the night because Leona wanted a midnight snack. He finds a bunch of vegetables in the kitchen and decides to make some soup with them. Jade appears and informs him that those actually belong to him; to avoid having to owe him any debts, Ruggie offers to teach Jade some ways to cook them, since the reason Jade had left them there in the first place was so that he could ask the ghost chefs for recipe suggestions in the morning.

The awkward laugh they shared when Ruggie realized the vegetables were Jade’s tho 😂😂 I wish the side stories were voiced omg

The one who taught Ruggie all of those recipes was his grandma

Also Ruggie sings while he cooks 👁👁💖

Azul 🐙 Just One Die

Idia brings a game called The Magical Game of Life to one of the board game club meetings; Azul gets very passionate about it despite at first turning his nose up at games that only rely on luck. Eventually he starts practicing how to perfectly throw a die to land on the number he wants so he can cheat the luck factor.

Azul.... honest to god he never slacks off 😭

Jade 🐬 A Mindset I Can’t Understand

Jade is making teas in the middle of the courtyard when Kalim stops by to see what’s going on. Kalim ends up talking about teas from his home, and Jade asks if he could show him how to brew the special tea they have for guests. It’s supposed to be super sweet so Kalim insists on dumping as much sugar as possible into the cup, but Jade really hates sugar.

Kalim got so disgusted when Jade was talking about his raw meat diet in the sea 😂😂

But also Kalim 🙏 He tries so hard to help everyone but he always happens to miss the mark

Floyd 🦈 Talk with Me About Something Fun

Floyd gets bored working on a report so he decides to go bug Riddle, insisting that they do their homework together. He helps Riddle find a book he needs but won’t quit playing around with him over it. In his anger, Riddle brings up how differently Jade is compared to him, and Floyd immediately gets bored and leaves.

The book Riddle needed was called “The History of Magic Carpet Weaving”

Kalim 🦂 Let’s Get Along!

Kalim is shopping at Mr. S’s Mystery Shop for the Scarabia 1st years welcome party. Riddle asks him why he’s the one running errands and not Jamil (the reason was that Jamil was stressed with how Kalim was handling the decorations for the party so sent him away basically 😂). Kalim ends up inviting Riddle to the party; he only agrees after he hears there will be a magic carpet there.

Kalim is so rich it hurts 💀 Riddle called him out for yawning during dorm leader meetings and he said “If I yawned at Scarabia, Jamil would just get my bed ready for me!”

When he was talking about the magic carpet Kalim said “Let’s go to the end of the world together” (Was that the name of the wintry tundra in Aladdin??)

This is the one where Kalim talks about how he only eats Jamil’s food because he used to get poisoned as a child; his dad & Jamil had told him “This is the fate of the oldest son of the Asim family”

Jamil 🐍 I Mean It

At lunch, Kalim and Ruggie go get food for themselves plus Jamil and Leona; while they’re waiting, Leona implies that Jamil might try to hurt Kalim someday, much to Jamil’s offense. Later Ruggie and Jamil mull over having to work with their respective ‘masters.’

Leona’s intelligence is often downplayed bc of how lazy he is but he really is good at figuring things out 👁 This was shown in Cater’s story too.

Ruggie and Jamil having that little squabble about how they think each other’s masters (for lack of a better word) would be more difficult to deal with was kind of cute 😂

[neshabeingchildish]

The Swellview Shut In

This is for Pearl @pearlselegancies, though I don’t know if she’ll feel up to reading at the moment. I do want to preface it by saying that it involves the quarantine, but not in a sad and negative way (mostly). Really, I wanted to do more of a focus on the good things in life/friendship/found family and bonding type of premise. Hopefully, she enjoys this and anyone else who reads, too.

Charlotte Page: Student Mentor - The Swellview Shut In

A sickness was sweeping over the globe. Charlotte figured that it wouldn’t get to Swellview. Nothing ever really reached Swellview, but apparently, this was everywhere, because whenever Jasper showed up to her house in the morning, he had on gloves, a mask and was carrying a cleaning caddy in his hand. “What is up with this?” She wondered.

“The sickness has made it to Swellview, they’re closing school for at least two weeks!” He said. Then, he pulled out a can of disinfectant and began spraying her door and her things.

“There’s no school today?” She asked. 

“Oh, no… There IS, but it’s only so that we can go in and grab our things, then they are promptly shutting the doors until further notice. Come on, I have stuff in my locker and I know that you do too.”

“If there’s really something going around, isn’t it stupid for them to even have the school open?”

“They were going to straight up close, but a lot of parents and stuff made a big deal about stuff like devices that teachers took up and locker possessions, so they had to open for that, but they’re like, setting up handwashing stations in the front and stuff. Do you not watch the news?” 

The school didn’t have handwashing stations set up at the front of the building, but there were handwritten signs reminding everyone to wash their hands before and after touching things. Charlotte went to her locker and emptied it into her bag, still not fully believing that it was necessary, but taking her stuff, just in case. She texted Henry to see if he was going to do the same. He had no idea what she was even talking about. She texted Piper and moments later, the freshman met her at her locker. 

“They’re kicking us out of school for at least two weeks! What do they expect me to do for breakfast and lunch? Eat the food at home? That’s way more expensive! Henry is gonna flip. Can I stay at your house?” Piper made prayer hands. Charlotte thought about it for a moment. Her parents were out of town and she did have an extra bed, but also… Her parents would flip out if she invited someone over in the middle of a possible pandemic… “Tell them it’s for charity!” Piper squealed, knowing by now how Charlotte’s mind worked. 

At that moment, Jasper walked up to the two of them and handed his cleaning caddy to Piper, “You need to sanitize and gear up,” he said. “Gloves, mask. Charlotte REFUSED, like a fool.” Piper sighed and furrowed her eyebrows, then dropped the caddy on the floor, letting it spill products, to Jasper’s dismay. He rushed to collect them and also told Charlotte, “Char, I’ve gotta quarantine at your place.”

“What? No,” she said. “I’m not gonna have you and Piper at my house while my parents are gone and school is out!” Charlotte said.

Piper squealed, “You’re letting me stay!” and she bounced up and down.

Jasper stood up, with his products collected and asked, “You’re shutting me out? Ugh. Charlotte. You know that I can’t stay at my house for something like this. I spent hours cleaning up last night and barely made a dent. My mom’s not working again. This morning, the threw her empty ice cream pint right onto the recliner next to the couch she’s been sleeping on. I JUST cleared all of the trash off yesterday! I don’t want the illness in my space, Charlotte. LOOK AT ME!” She looked at him. He really appeared to be freaking out about the possibility of germs. 

She sighed, “I’ll ask my parents, Jasper.” She wrapped an arm around Piper and said, “Come on. Let’s go get you some clothes from home.”

“TOO MUCH TOUCHING!” Jasper said and began to spray both of them with disinfectant, until Piper punched him in the ribs. “OUCH!”

“Jasper… tone down,” Charlotte said.

“She literally just punched me!”

“After you assaulted us with disinfectant!”

“For your own good!” Jasper said.

.

Piper let them into her house and was surprised to see Henry there. “For some reason, I assumed that when they closed school, you’d rush into work,” she said. He gave her a little smile, but didn’t respond.  Charlotte raised an eyebrow and went over to him while Piper rushed upstairs to get packed. 

“So, I’m gonna take her and Jasper in for a few at my place. My parents are actually stuck overseas and the town is officially going under curfew. So, I’ll make sure she’s taken care of for a little bit. Slight bit of stress off of you, right?” He frowned and nodded. “Why do I feel like it isn’t?”

He sighed and glanced towards the stairs, before saying quietly, “I’m temporarily out of work.” Charlotte gasped. Henry was the one who kept them above water and she could tell from his face that being out of work was going to most likely really hurt them. He noticed her face and forced a smile. “Don’t worry, Babe. I’ll figure something out.” He gave her a little kiss on the forehead and she smiled, in spite of being completely worried about him and Piper. But, there was something about him calling her “Babe” that kind of… made stuff at least go under the radar for a moment. 

Their relationship was a little assumed, and not officially spoken of, but Henry was usually affectionate with her and called her “Babe,” so in her mind, they were pretty much married. In fact, she had been working out the logistics in her mind, hypothetically, for what if he came along with her whenever she left for college? Sure, it would be a struggle, but he was used to some level of that and the job market where she was going was actually better than Swellview. And, yes… They would have to bring Piper, because he certainly wouldn’t leave her to fend for herself, but she could have a fresh new start at a new school and maybe even thrive if she had a happy Henry there with her and also the mentorship of Charlotte, reaching beyond the school’s program… “Babe? You okay?” Henry wondered, cutting into her overthinking tangent.

“Yeah. You… wanna come over? Since, you’re not gonna be at work? We can maybe play video games and stuff. No school for the next few weeks. You rarely get a relaxing night.”

“Yeah, I actually want to try to see what one of those ‘good night’s sleep’ things feel like,” he said. 

Piper came downstairs with her bags and said, “Henry, bring these to Jasper’s junk heap for me. I gotta see what cleaners we have. That’s what I’m using for “gas money” while we’re out of school.” 

She dropped them on the floor by the door and Henry laughed and finally let his hand drop from Charlotte’s hip. “Guess WILL be working,” he said. 

He went to go get her stuff and she went opening cabinets, “Do we SERIOUSLY not have basic household cleaners in this place? Are we THOSE people?”

“The oldest adult in your home just turned 18 a few months ago,” Charlotte reminded her. “Don’t worry about it, though. There’s plenty of cleaner at my place and Jasper took everything from his, because his folks were never going to use it anyway.”

“Dude… Are we about to do the apocalypse like the last kids on Earth?” Piper asked, excitedly.

“We’re spending some days, maybe a couple of weeks at my house. Did you bring hobby stuff? Because you’re not gonna be able to go out and hang with your girls when you’re bored. You need like books and stuff.”

“Books? Like… in case we run out of toilet paper? I think we’ve got some, somewhere…” Piper left and Charlotte didn’t even stop her. 

Henry came back inside and Charlotte wondered, “So… Are you coming over? We might be stuck there and that might mean not seeing your sister for a few…”

He made a confused face. “You worried about me not seeing Piper, or me not seeing you?”

“I mean… Are you worried about it?” She asked, nonchalantly shrugging her shoulders.

“It’d totally suck. Let me go get some stuff packed and I’ll meet you all there.” 

“Cool,” she said. She was really cheering inside. In fact, mentally, there was an entire Glee Cheerios performance, complete with stunts as she awkwardly left the house. 

Piper came back into view and said, “Well, most of these pages are pretty rough, so I vote making Jasper use these as toilet paper whenever stock gets low…” Henry stared at her in confusion. She waved a hand and stuffed a book into a duffel bag. “That was for Charlotte’s ears. Forget I said it.” She left, too and Henry sighed. This was going to be… Interesting.

.

Jasper and Piper worked on getting everything cleaned up while Henry unpacked and brought everything to the rooms that Charlotte assigned. Jasper was fine to take the couch, but most of his stuff would have to be kept in Charlotte’s room, simply because she wasn’t going to have her parents come back to see Jasper had moved into their living room! She and Piper were in her bedroom, all of Piper’s stuff fit beneath the spare bed, so Jasper’s was in the closet. And Henry was given her parents’ room, because he was the least likely to impose on their stuff. In fact, he was so uncomfortable that he didn’t want to unpack any of his things in there, but their bathroom was amazing. He was ready to at least spend some time in that shower. 

In fact, he got into the shower after he unloaded everything from Jasper’s car. Charlotte was making a list of things that they might need - which, she felt like they were pretty stocked up for the house - but normally, 3 people lived there, and now four were and there was a different basis of need, too. Her mother told her to use the emergency credit card to stock up and to message them everyday updates on how things were, and also photos of the house. She and Jasper went to gather everything, people were really wilding at the store, like… she was shocked at their behavior. Jasper had to guard her several times, and when they finally made it out, hours had passed. 

Henry and Piper were in her room whenever they got back to the house. They both felt uncomfortable being anywhere else in the house without permission, so they were just catching up in there. But, Henry rushed to help them bring everything in once they got there. 

They all unloaded the truck and Jasper and Charlotte told them about the way that people were behaving and how much more serious it seemed after having been around them like that. Henry was bothered by the fact that people were getting rough with Charlotte and he hadn’t been there to protect her. Protecting was kind of his thing, and Charlotte was kind of his girl. 

Piper told the others, “So, I’ve planned out a movie night thing for every night this week, since we’re gonna be in here at least that long. I’m thinking that it’ll be cool to watch some apocalypse kinda stuff. Maybe some zombie stories. End of the world, dystopian mood.”

“In this climate?” Charlotte wondered.

“Especially in this climate,” Piper said. 

“I think we should have assigned chores and designated dinner making nights,” Jasper said.

“Good idea, but I don’t cook. I suck at it. It would be a waste of food.”

Charlotte said, “My mom told me to make meals, do meal prep and also freeze some meals, so I’m going to get started on that today, since it’s more people than I usually have had to do stuff like this for.”

“You’ve had to do stuff like that before?” Henry asked.

Piper chuckled, “Her parents are almost literally never home,” she said. 

“They work a lot and since I’m older now, they take on a lot more overseas ventures than when I was younger,” Charlotte explained, defensively. 

Henry furrowed his eyebrows, wondering how he didn’t know that piece of information, but then again, he and Charlotte didn’t tend to discuss family stuff. Or at least… not hers. In fact, it occurred to him that he didn’t even know what her family LOOKED like. He didn’t want to ask, but he made a mental note to look for a photo later or something. In fact, he checked her social media. Surely, she had something there. But, her social media was pretty lacking in the parental area. He did see some people with her last name, though they were all white, so he clicked on a few, just out of curiosity. He found Fiona Page, who actually had a lot of young photos of her and Charlotte and one of the posts was her wishing her daughter a great time at Future Visionaries Camp. Now, he felt the need to investigate…

Charlotte and Jasper went to the kitchen. They had a routine for things like this, and they got started on their cooking party while Piper learned the remote control to the Pages’ system and Henry sat on his phone, looking at Charlotte’s mom’s page. Charlotte was fine to leave them to that while she and Jasper made a meal. It was the first time that she had Henry over in all the time that she’d known him. Mostly… Charlotte didn’t let people into her home. Piper was the first person in a while, and even she had only been over a couple of times, and only in the past few months. Jasper was the only friend that came over kind of regularly, and that was because (she believed) that her parents saw him as a charity case, and boy were they big on those. 

.

One week of denial passed. Then, a week of realization. By the third week, they had touched base with all of the adults - her parents were going to remain overseas for now, but didn’t mind if she kept her friends there. Jasper’s parents were BOTH so sick that they could barely leave the house. Charlotte told him to just stay put and fight that urge to go help take care of them. They could always call 911 if they simply couldn’t stand it. He was no doctor and this was a pandemic. Henry’s mom had “been trying to figure out where on Earth her children were” this whole time (she was at the Hart house, had found Jake in an alley and brought him home and the two of them were going to spend the citywide quarantine there). Piper wanted to go home, but whenever Charlotte told her that she would have to stay there if she did, she opted for just staying, also; but she was very visibly upset about it. Henry spent time trying to cheer her up. His boss called to tell him that he wasn’t sure if he would even be able to reopen the store after all of this. Nobody was in a good way, except for Charlotte and her family, so she tried not to harp on the things that she was feeling too much, because she felt like it was petty in comparison to the others.

Charlotte left all of her friends in the living room after dinner to go into her room and relax for a moment. She usually had some time just before dinner to meditate and unwind from the school day, but the past few weeks, she hadn’t done so, considering the change in the house. She needed at least a couple of minutes. 

After having been there for only a moment, Henry knocked on the door and peeked in, “Hey. You okay?” He asked. She forced a smile and nodded her head. She was lighting a candle and had a record player playing in the background. “I feel like I just interrupted something. I’ll go,” he said. She didn’t stop him. He sat down outside of the door and got back onto his phone. In case somebody else came around, he’d let them know that she didn’t seem to want to be bothered at the moment. 

Charlotte went into her bathroom and drew herself a bath. She could shower tomorrow. It wasn’t like she did a whole lot today, anyway… Well… maybe she should shower afterwards, just to be safe, if there were so many germs going around that now they were getting emails about prom being cancelled and POSSIBLY graduation. That was a hit to her gut. She knew that she probably wasn’t going to win prom queen. That Bianca most likely had that in the bag, and while Charlotte got a lot more popular her senior year than previously, Bianca had been on the road to prom royalty since junior high. But graduation? That was basically robbery. That was something that she PERSONALLY looked forward to for 13 years of her life! The first day of school, she asked her teacher, “When does school end?” and they said 3:00. “Forever?” she’d asked. Well, she certainly loved learning, but going to classrooms full of other people to do it was never her favorite thing and now that she was the best of the best in her area at it… she hated the thought of not finally being front and center, standing up to say, “Nobody can force us to go to school anymore!” Though… she wouldn’t really say that and she was gonna continue to go to school, but… Graduation was just really important and the thought of not getting one was a huge loss to her! 

She cried, listening to scratchy vinyl crooning, soaking away as much of her physical stress as possible, and posted a tiny rant about losing the opportunity to have prom and a graduation ceremony, and then just let it all out before taking a shower, doing her hair and resurfacing for her friends to let them know that she was going to go to bed and also to remind them to try to get some rest themselves.

She made it to the living room, where they all appeared to be having like crafts time or something - weird, but maybe not since they were quarantined. She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, then said, “Um… I’m gonna go to bed. Probably like lay down and read or something. You all should try to get some sleep too.”

Henry had a pile of flowers he was toying around with until she began speaking, then he looked up and wondered, “Can I tuck you in?”

“I guess?” She said, laughing a little bit. He set down his craft materials and went with her. “You all look awfully busy with… crafts?”

“Yeah. We’re workin’ on something big,” he said, smiling. She wanted to ask him what, but she was actually exhausted from worrying and crying, so she kissed him goodnight and went to bed, opting for a book instead of reading on her phone, because she really didn’t want to see another mention of the quarantine, the virus, or the panic surrounding these things. 

.

She was always the first one up, out of all of them. The few times she’d crashed at Henry’s, she learned that. Today was an exception, though. Whenever she got up, she noted first that Piper wasn’t in the spare bed, but figured that she probably slept on the couch, because that was where the TV was and she loved TV almost as much as she loved social media. Charlotte turned on some music, went to brush her teeth and did morning stretches. She went to the living room, excited to start the day out with her friends, but paused whenever she got there and Piper was hissing at Jasper that he was hanging it wrong. She stood for a moment, taking in the room. There were these individual sheets of paper, with string connecting them to make a banner and each page was a letter, for a banner that read “HOUSE PROM.” 

“I have to be careful with it, or it’s going to tear!” Jasper fussed back at the freshman. 

Henry came into the house with a bucket full of flowers and paused whenever he saw Charlotte. 

“Morning…” He said. “I can explain.”

“You guys saw that I was bummed that Prom is cancelled, so you figured you’d turn my living room into a makeshift prom?”

“This guy gets it,” Jasper said from the step ladder.

“I know it’s not gonna be like a real prom, but… Me and Jasper are gonna wear suits. Piper’s gonna DJ. I made you a SICK flower crown… It’s gonna be okay,” Henry said, smiling and wincing at the same time, hoping that he sounded convincing. 

She sniffled and went to hug him. “These are for additional decoration… I was gonna make some arrangements and stuff. Nobody’s buying the flowers from the supermarkets, so I was actually able to get a lot of them pretty damn cheaply.” She gave him a kiss on the lips and he smiled wider. “And, I get to see you in your prom dress! You designed it, right?”

“Yeah…” 

“That’s awesome. I don’t think I’ve ever seen any of your design work.” He moved out of her reach to get back to decorations. She went to start on breakfast for everybody. He didn’t want to mention it right now, but he also was working on throwing her a mock graduation. Because, even though she had been trying to convince herself that everything would blow over and they would be able to finish the year out properly, the news said something totally different.

.

The House Prom was fun. Jasper made punch. Piper had great music and went live a few times so that kids at school could know that Henry and her did this FIRST, even if some of the rich kids might wind up doing it fancier. And Henry was stunned by Charlotte’s prom dress. He wasn’t sure what color it was, but went with whites and golds for her flower crown, which didn’t clash bad with the opaque pinkish dress that she had. The style of the crown wasn’t exactly a match for the style of the dress, but she insisted that it was perfect, that everything was perfect, and honestly, that was what really mattered to him. 

Henry knew that he wasn’t as smart as her, or have as much money, or as much education and stuff.. But, making her happy… that still mattered to him, because he believed that he could, so he made sure that he did. The thought of them going their separate ways in a few months was always scary for him as he fell for her, but also… it made him aware that he had only a short period of time to impact her life forever. House Prom was one of those forever impacts. 

They had an after party in Charlotte’s bedroom, which was just them laughing, eating and taking selfies to post to their House Prom tag, which was POPPING! Everyone at school wanted to be at Charlotte’s house, especially upon realizing that there were no adults there for the whole quarantine. She was extremely happy to have been so unpopular before. Now, nobody could just pop up at her house. Eventually, Piper fell to sleep and Jasper began dozing off in Charlotte’s bed. She scoffed, “How’s he gonna just fall asleep in MY bed?” 

Henry said, “I can sleep on the couch, if you wanna crash in your parents’ room.”

“No, no. I’ll take care of it, she said.” She had to shower and stuff, so she went to do that and Henry retired to her parents’ room. After she was all washed up and ready for bed, she went to look at Jasper, halfway hanging off of her bed, his suit all disheveled and his hair tousled. He looked like a little boy and more importantly, peaceful. She sighed grabbed a blanket and left the bedroom. Henry was already in bed when she peeked in, but he sat up, so she either woke him or he hadn’t fallen asleep yet. “Hey… I wanna crash in here, if that’s cool with you?”

“Yeah. I’ll take the couch, sure.”

“No.. I wanted to crash in here… with you.”

He smiled brightly, “Even better!” She came and climbed into bed and pulled the blanket with her. “How did you like being Prom Queen for a night?”

“It was awesome! You’re amazing. Thank you for doing that for me. I really didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Your situation with your parents and Jasper’s… I’m actually so lucky and to complain in front of all of you felt cheap.”

He pulled her to himself and hugged her, “I want to know things about you, Char. You’re my girl. I don’t want you to feel like you have to wait until things are good for me to tell me what’s wrong with you. You’d be waiting forever.” She looked up at his face and he gave her a little half smile. “I never want you to have to wait on me,” he said.

She sat up now and placed both of her hands on his chest, tapping a little rhythm while she thought of how to say what she wanted to say.

“So… I was thinking… I know that you and Piper are a package deal, at least while she’s still so young, and that you hadn’t thought about things beyond graduation very much, but I was thinking and I’ve also kind of been looking into the details… IF you wanted to come with me, when I leave for Harvard, I’m gonna have a place out there. You won’t have to work to pay bills, but if you need something to hold you and Piper over, the job market is better there than it is here, and… I don’t know… Maybe you want to stay here and try to help your parents, or something, but if you did want to…”

“I do.” He smiled and then laughed, with tears in his eyes, “Of course I do! There’s nothing keeping me here and Piper… well, she’ll just have to understand that there’s not actually anything keeping her here either. I was so scared that whenever you left, you’d just forget about us. You’ve been… looking into the details?”

She shrugged her shoulders, “I can’t imagine my life without you in it anymore.” 

He smiled and gave her a kiss. “Come on, it’s bedtime.”

*******************************************************************************************

Also Tagging, because now I feel like I should be because of how y’all been talking about it @sunbeameyes @kiddangers @bitchmilsky @chenoahchantel @adorkable-blackgirl @daintyurbanprincess @ciara-knightly I think that’s it. My comfort level has expired. Lol. 

[rex101111]

2, 3, 7, 11, 15, and 19 for meta fanfiction asks!

2.  Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

Once I have more time on my hands, I really wanna get back to writing the second chapter of “She is the moonlight”, like there’s so many fun scenes in my head I wanna write down (as you should know becc;D) and I really wanna get back to it.

Also I had a few Eri ideas and it has been ages since I wrote for my daughter, which is a travesty, and I need to get back on that XD

3.  What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)

gaaaah which one??? Like, there’s one where Bakugou grows a moral center and gets on his hands and knees for deku to forgive him for telling him to kill himself (but that would take an entire fic’s worth of set up to properly build up and fuuu-).

Or I would really like to write this like short inbetween scene with Inko. Just after they get the news from UA that the students will move to the dorms but the night before All Might comes to visit to convince Inko it’s a good idea, but I wanna write a bunch about Inko’s life before that, maybe expand on her own personal experience with heroes? Maybe give her some prior reason to doubt Izuku would be safe with UA? Nana cameo to explain her earlier hairstyle like maybe Inko was a hero fan but grew out of it and saw a bunch of heroes get hurt and-...fuck it:

“Are you sure it’s okay?”

It isn’t. It isn’t even slightly okay, but Izuku has that smile on his face. That fragile one, the kind she’s broken before. She remembers that night, as clear as if it were yesterday; her little boy crying and shaking in front of a computer screen after being told all his dreams were worthless.

There’s a pit in the bottom of her stomach, and as it grows the urge to tell him no grows with it. She felt Kamino from her kitchen, her TV screen a peak into the apocalypse. 

Not even a week before he son was on a hospital bed with his arms broken in two dozen places, and then his teachers, and even some of his friends, were neck deep in something even worse.

She should say no.

She has every right to tell him no.

But he has that smile on his face.

“Of course dear.” Her mouth is full of lead, her smile feels heavy and fetid on her face. “Go see what you need to pack.”

He hugs her, kisses her cheek, rushes off to his room while calling her the best, and she can barely register any of it. She finds her way, somehow, to her couch, and puts her face in her hands.

Heroes die Inko, her mother’s voice echoes out, cold but afraid, they help and they save and they win, but at the end they die.

She was young before All Might showed up, very young, be she had memories of before; of early heroes crashing against overwhelming odds, of mass funerals and of hero agencies closing down not from lack of funding but lack of personal.

She thinks back to the summer camp (do you really need to come back?), to the shopping mall (he’s smiling put keeps putting a hand to his neck), to the sports festival (his fingers are a shade of purple so vivid she can see it even when they zoom out), to that last week before middle school graduation (Where did all that confidence come from, she thought she broke it all...). She remembers her little boy, covered in bruises and wiping away his tears (Mitsuki asking what her “brat” did this time, Inko doesn’t know what to say).

She thinks of him smiling and crying as he showed her his acceptance letter, of him pouring over his homework every morning, of unwrapping bandages from his broken fingers as he promises her (again) that he’ll be more careful.

She sees, as clear as day, her son, her baby, her Izuku, motionless and bleeding as the world burned around him and some monster without a face and without a heart laughs at him.

(All Might barely made it out alive. Kamino is a warzone. Her son, with broken arms and a broken smile and broken-and broken-and broken-)

She gets up from the couch in a rush, races for the faucet in her kitchen, and vomits so powerfully she starts coughing and tearing up.

She breathes heavily for a few moments, silently wiping her mouth as she waits for Izuku to rush down the stairs to check on her. He doesn’t, mercifully he didn’t hear her. She rinses the taste from her mouth, cleans her face, sobs, cleans her face again, and then goes to her computer with a stomp in her step and her lips in a thin line.

With a heavy heart but a steady, determined hand she types in “Hero School admittance and transfer” into the search engine and spends the next two hours reading about Shiketsu, and Ketsubutsu, and Isamu, and a hundred other names she only heard about in vague news snippets.

She’ll break his heart, that smile, like ten years didn’t pass and nothing changed, but she forges onward. He’ll feel betrayed, he’ll feel lied to, but she is done with UA, she is done with her son coming home with broken bones.

She is done and she afraid and she will not let her son be chewed up and spat out like he means nothing, like he’s just another sacrifice for the system that promises All Might but only fills out graves.

She won’t take his dream, he needs to know she still believes in him, but Inko Midoriya is done trusting her child’s safety to someone else who doesn’t know him, doesn’t know his wounds and scars like she does, doesn’t know his hopes and his heart and all the tiny little things that makes Izuku who he is like she does.

She doesn’t know who will come in a few days to convince her, but they will be wasting their time. She feels guilty for that, but only for a moment. She made a list, it has a dozen or so names on it. Options, choices, for Izuku to decide and not her.

She raises from her computer chair with a groan and a pain in her lower back and the bottom of her chest. She climbs the stairs to her bedroom, stopping briefly to look at Izuku’s door. The same childish All Might sticker proudly staring back at her. There’s no noise behind the door, he’s asleep, and after everything the last few days had thrown at him, she doesn’t have the heart to take even a minute of sleep away from him.

She lays down on top of the covers without changing out of her day clothes, exhaustion in her bones. She looks at her bedside table, sees the one picture she still has of her husband. A hand on her shoulder and a baby with grass green hair in her hands.

He’s smiling widely at the camera, reaching for it with his hands.

She buries her face in her pillow and waits for sleep to take her.

(FUCK DONE HERE HAVE IT BLAH)

7.  What do you think are the characteristics of your personal writing style? Would others agree?

Personally I think my style is descriptive. Like most of the time I describe what’s going on in like a “third person narrator” sort of way and dialog is actually relatively short and to the point. Like, there’s a lead up to what a person says, their expression and body language plus an action, the line, and then a follow through on that and then repeating with the next person and so on.

Also I can go on tangents if a story is character-centric, like focuses on a single character then I go ham on introspection...as demonstrated by the above ^^;

11. What do you envy in other writers?

The ability to write down and rely on an outline. Like, I just cannot for the life of me really stick to a plan for too long, like I have the general idea and just add to it as I go. Writing by the seat of my pants is the only way I know how and it either gets me something I like the look of or it doesn’t get me anything at all.

15. Which is harder: titles or summaries (or tags)?

Titles are the last thing I think of, so I guess that XD I usually try not to stress out about summaries too much, usually I just either pick an interesting line from the fic, say something vaguely deep, or depend on a template. Like with my Eri shorts I always use that Two Lines for the summary, “character does something, the result of that action in as vague wording as possible”

Tags are also kinda confusing, like, do I tag everything about it XDD that’d take me longer than it took to write the damn thing!

19.  s there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe ‘too often’, trope you can’t get enough of?)

Adding shit (like this) is so much fun, though I try not to over indulge XD Also a smile either “crawls” or “forms” on someone’s face, that’s the only way. Also long sentences. Also lots of “,”

Lots of short sentences describing something vaguely.

(Long paragraphs in parenthesis describing something that happened in the past or a character having deep thoughts because that shit can’t just be a fluid part of the text nooo it needs to be it’s own separate things it needs to break up the flow for a second that’s the whole point-)

and that’s what I can think of XD Call me out on other stuff I’m sure I’m blind to plenty of my bullshit XD

Thanks a lot Becc! 

[dorwinionwhining]

Please share your thoughts on Russingon if you feel like it.

ahhh, i’m not used to being asked for my thoughts like this, thank you, anon!

and for anyone else who is curious: anon is referring to this lovely post on trauma in the silmarillion and the tags i left on it.

so, my thoughts.

i suppose i'll start with the wall of tags i was halfway through writing before deciding to delete them: maedhros and fingon are often portrayed as a pairing between a traumatized person and a person who helps and supports the healing of that trauma

this is a common couple trope that exists throughout many fandoms and i'm not all that shocked it's been latched onto for the two of them considering the main story we're introduced to their canon relationship through involves fingon rescuing maedhros from a widely known and accepted form of trauma: capture, torture and imprisonment by an enemy you're in the middle of fighting a war against.

but to me that portrayal does both of them a disservice. it dismisses potential sources of trauma in fingon's life as well as simplifying maedhros's trauma as resulting from a singular event that happened to him and that he was saved from.

one of the things i love about the silmarillion is how it shows suffering compounded by previous suffering. melkor's theme is repetitive. echoes of trauma build off of each other, rippling outwards so that eventually the entire world is infused with them down to its core.

look at what these two elves go through:

their homeland is invaded, their grandfather is murdered and the light of the world itself is extinguished.

the home maedhros is living in is robbed, his father instigates the kinslaying and the theft of the ships and maedhros participates. he then sets off on a harrowing trip across the sea to an unknown continent to fight a war against the strongest of the valar, and when he gets there his father decides to burn the ships, stranding them and preventing anyone from following. maedhros protest this but his father and brothers all decide to carry it out anyway, ignoring him. then his father dies. he inherits the kingship and is suddenly in charge of all his brothers and their men. this culminates in him getting tricked into an ambush where his men are slain around him.

fingon comes across the kinslaying as it's in progress and leaps in to defend fëanor's side without knowing what's happening, then fëanor and his sons set sail while he's left to wait with his father and their men for the ships to return. but the ships burn instead and his father decides to cross the ice. the descriptions tolkien gives of the landscape there make it sound like one of the worst places on earth. people die. fingon's sister in law dies. it's a terrible journey and when it's finally over they're met with a battle, which ends in a victory but also with the death of fingon's youngest sibling. then fingon hears that maedhros has been captured and is presumed dead, and he makes the decision to walk off alone into enemy territory in search of him.

this is just what happens surrounding their arrival in beleriand, it doesn't touch on maedhros's torture and it doesn't include fingon's rescue. it also doesn't include anything about the oath (despite my own personal belief that fëanor having his children swear it again over his dying body had to have been, uhhh, i'll say impactful to avoid going off on a tangent) and it doesn't include things that could have or had to have happened off page, the everyday stresses of figuring out food, water, shelter, combat, weather conditions, etc., or any of the politics, which would have been incredibly stressful, especially for maedhros after the death of his father and for fingon after fingolfin's arrival in mithrim.

and it's not like this just stops after the rescue. it's not like the two of them are ever given a clean moment to process what's happened to them. no one in this book is. new stressful events are always coming along on the heels of old ones, and often the best thing to do for everyone (because there's always someone else who is suffering more, now, in this moment) is to move on however you can. even if moving on means leaving pieces of yourself behind.

so fingon and maedhros interest me because their traumas, shared and separate, have so much potential to play off of each other, negatively as well as positively. how can they possibly navigate an intimate relationship with all of this behind them and even more ahead?

i understand why portraying them more simplistically is popular, why maedhros is often the one getting his traumas spotlighted with fingon as his well adjusted lover who helps him heal and offers him a bright spot in the darkness until he's tragically lost and maedhros goes back to unravelling. but for me personally i often wish there was more complexity. 

i can work with maedhros carrying lasting trauma from thangorodrim. i don't think tolkien would have written the line about him carrying a shadow of pain in his heart if it wasn't important. the silmarillion isn't a book that prioritizes character details. but if he's traumatized and fingon isn't then there needs to be a reason, an explanation, some thought put into why that's the case. is it something inherent in fingon's nature, in maedhros's? are there some things elves can heal from mentally and some things they can't?

and fingon can be traumatized without overshadowing or taking away from maedhros’s trauma. there’s not a limit, unfortunately, on the number of people who can be hurt by others and by circumstance. i want to see his coping mechanisms, his pain and suffering and how it develops as he loses more and more of his family as his father’s reign unfolds.

there's a lot of room for variation. i'm always interested when i see people exploring these two, and i'm always craving more.

and i don't want anyone to think i'm saying there's a right and wrong way to portray their relationship. even if you're someone with opposite tastes to me who loves the version i'm currently complaining about then i want you to keep loving it. this isn't a fandom i'd ever want to take anything away from. i'd always much rather just add more.

and yeah, i think this wall of text is gigantic enough. i kind of lost some of the points i wanted to make along the way. must be because i never got to the point in school where i needed to learn how to write essays so all of this was just a stream of consciousness ramble. i'll probably remember something important three days from now and be kind of annoyed.

but, uhhh, there's some of what i was thinking. again, thank you for the ask, anon, and i'm sorry! you were probably expecting something a little less ridiculous.

[sobdasha]

some (very long) Hiro metas and a Kisa-n-Tohru tangent

seeing the "Hiro is a brat!" "Hiro just has trauma!" debate has made me ponder…

Like, not to compare trauma and argue who had what worse and invalidate suffering, but my immediate reaction was kind of, "Wait, what? I mean, okay, I guess Hiro did just have some trauma re: Kisa, but like, overall…???"

So it's time for some scrutiny!

I’mma talk myself through this in a post.

Here we have Hiro. He's a Souma, which is pretty damn traumatic in its own right, and possessed by a Zodiac spirit, which is even worse. He's part of an elite inner circle, privileged with status and wealth; but on the flip side, there's still people in the family who look down on the Zodiac, and Hiro's looking at a future of isolation (afraid of looking like a monster, afraid to betray the family secret, not properly free to pick his own job, may or may not be able to live outside the estate, love life is gonna be a disaster when puberty hits). And Akito, whom the possessed part of him loves deeply and desperately, tends to weaponize his own love and withhold it when someone displeases him, or turn hurtful when someone needs punishment.

Okay, so that's bad. But Hiro shares that with all of the Zodiac members, that's just the baseline trauma, and there's some compounding issues at play that Hiro lacks:

- Hiro, as the Sheep, isn't especially hated. Kyou, for instance, has a bad attitude that's partly due to the entire clan ragging on him for being a horrible abomination of a monster, comparing him unfavorably to Idealized Yuki, and telling him he's gonna be locked up in a one-room house on the estate to suffer out his life--and that's not even counting how being the Cat affected how his immediate family treated him. Haru, as the Ox, got ~harmlessly teased~ about being a big dumb slow stupid ox by the family so much that he started flipping over to a Black personality to violently vent his feelings.

- Hiro's family life is, as far as I can tell, actually ideal. His parents didn't reject him (Momiji, Kyou re: his sperm donor, Rin), split up over him (I suspect this is what happened for Kagura, because her parents argued a lot when she was young, and I wonder about the fact that Ritsu's dad isn't at the onsen? And there's no mention of Kisa's dad? But then again, we're told repeatedly that Yuki and Ayame have a father and he lives in the same house as their mother and I've never seen proof of this man's existence), be coolly indifferent to him (Ayame after Yuki was born and he got off the hook but honestly I think that was a blessing to him, Yuki, Hatori), or get extremely overprotective (Kyou re: his mom, I'd argue this is partly why Ritsu's mom is so stressed out, and also I'd argue this may be why Kisa's mom hits her limit). In fact, Hiro's the only one who we can definitely say has two parents, who live together, and have a good relationship, and actively enjoy nurturing their child. Also Satsuki's completely adorkable. (This puts strain on Hiro in other ways, lol, but at least he shares that feeling with his dad.)

- Hiro, as the Sheep, probably doesn't particularly stand out. I'm guessing his hair color isn't particularly notable? So he probably hasn't been singled out for teasing from people who don't even know about the curse, like Kyou and Haru and Kisa. (No one's not-thirsty enough to have teased Ayame or Yuki for their looks, I'm pretty sure, and Momiji can pull the biracial card, even if that wouldn't stop people, and went to international school, where people probably found other ways to pick on you.)

So where, for Hiro, does his particular extremely combative, condescending, scathing, sarcastic attitude come from?

That's not to say none of those things above could be factors. It's extremely possible that the family found dumb things to say to him because, y'know, clearly it's impossible to hurt a kid's feelings if you're arrogant enough about it. And like Kyouko says, you can't really judge someone's family situation based on their behavior, and vice versa. I'd expect Hiro to be super well-adjusted, coming from a loving nuclear family, but kids are people and they will turn out how they turn out both because of and in spite of how they're raised. And maybe Hiro's experienced some bullying about whatever, and his instant sharp-tongued retorts became the default in response to that. Hiro didn't tell us any of this, but who knows!

Or maybe Hiro's difficult phase is just a phase. Maybe that's how all his classmates talk to each other?? I can easily see that being a thing, especially with boys, both friendly with friends or aggressive with people you want to treat badly, and maybe Hiro's so much in the habit of it that he doesn't think first (and doesn't care enough about Tohru and her feelings to exercise a little self-control). Like this post that points out how it's a Definite Thing that part of Hiro's lording-little-brat arrogance is because he's in his final year of elementary school and he's everyone's senpai and that sort of thing is indulged because adults know he'll get cruelly humbled next year when he's a baby kouhai.

But I think maybe, what's most relevant with Hiro, is that because of his lack of obvious outside factors to fight against for personal growth, his growing pains as a character are internal. He's fighting against himself. AKA, it's only logical that he's a tiny little shit and his character arc is about growing into someone who isn't a jerkface. Which can be just as difficult and traumatic as standing up to your parents, or Akito, or society, or your classmates. Hiro has to assert himself against himself, and himself won't punch him in the face or lock him in his room but it's so easy to just put the blame elsewhere and let himself get away with it and give him a pass and stop trying to improve.

Now I wanna analyze the timeline!

Aside from a few select Zodiac members, Akito hasn't really done anything super terrible that we've heard about until Hiro's in 3rd grade. That's when Hatori and Kana ask to get married, and Hatori gets injured. Akito has been a jerk before, and Akito is very clearly in favor of a hierarchy that puts God at the top getting all the love. But Shigure and Ayame have talked about their sexcapades with no issue, and Kagura's always going on about her undying love for and future marriage with Kyou, and this is the first incident that says those things aren't allowed.

Sometime not terribly long after that, Shigure gets kicked out of the Main House. This ramps up Akito's hatred of women, though Hiro wouldn't know the betrayal behind it and might not have a clue about Akito's vendetta.

Right about the time Hiro starts 6th grade, he feels compelled to tell Akito that he has feelings for Kisa. (I'm pulling this from the Collector's Edition timeline. In the actual story I keep seeing the English being like "I always thought Hiro hated me / I thought Hiro hated me for a long time" with Kisa then immediately turning around and saying "We were bffs all through my elementary school years / Hiro always played with me until this year", so I heavily suspect the translators keep getting a modifier in the wrong place or something because wtf.) Akito kicks Kisa's ass and Kisa takes two weeks to heal. (This isn't Akito's fault. It's also not Kisa's fault, obviously, because Hiro didn't even tell her yet that he liked her. So that means it's all Hiro's fault.) Hiro's horrified, because he could have had an idea this would be bad but he probably didn't expect it to all be taken out on Kisa. After all, Hatori got hurt, not Kana, and Rin hasn't been pushed out a window yet.

Hiro abruptly cuts off his interaction with Kisa, to protect her from getting punished by Akito again. Kisa goes back to 7th grade, where she's just transitioned from Top Of The Heap Senpai and Just A Child So We Can Let Things Slide to Lowly Kouhai Who Needs To Learn Proper Social Behaviors, and she's being bullied, and her bff won't talk to her, and her Talking Things Out skills are having zero effect, so she just stops talking, and now her mom is upset, and then she starts skipping school, and now her mom is really upset. And Hiro was probably unaware of a lot of this, until it got really bad several months in, since he stopped seeing his bff.

And Hiro's agonizing and worrying about it, when suddenly Tohru swoops in and magically saves the day, bringing hope where there was none and erasing suffering, right when Hiro was probably nerving himself up to try to help somehow without bringing Akito's wrath back down on Kisa.

Oh I wanna have a tangent about Kisa!

Timeline again, but from Kisa's point of view:

Kisa and Hiro are only a year apart, so they've always been super close. Hiro is her bff.

Now Kisa is starting 7th grade.

Kisa does something Bad. It's not clear what, but it's Bad Enough to make Akito hate her and also seriously beat her up, so that's Pretty Bad.

Actually it's Really Very Bad, because after that Hiro hates her too.

Anyway Kisa's starting 7th grade! Yay! New school, new girls, new pressures. In my personal experience, middle school is when girls are at their nastiest (after they hit high school, they start to chill out. Obviously you still get jerks, because people, but there was a little more "live and let live" attitude), so I always assume this is part of the problem. Kisa's classmates start to bully her. Kisa tries out her conflict resolution skills, like the adult she's expected to be becoming, and it only causes the situation to escalate. Her self-esteem has already had the crap kicked out of it, and hasn't healed in 2+ weeks. Her bff hates her and won't talk to her.

And then Kisa just gives up without telling anyone why.

Tohru's got a very valid point, that it's hard to talk about the things that actually bother you. It's hard to ask for help. I can complain all day long about little things, but I can't put big issues into words without spontaneously bawling? Which is really fricken embarrassing???

But I think the reason Tohru strikes such a chord with Kisa, and is able to instantly win her over, is because she talks with such quiet feeling about being scared her mom wouldn't love her anymore. Because that feeling was very, very real for Tohru--grounded in the fact that Kyouko actually did abandon her once.

And Kisa recognized that, and realized that Tohru--unlike everyone else--actually got it, because that's exactly what Kisa's feeling. Because Kisa's gotten along with her mother very well all her life, if what we see of her with Hiro is any indication. Except that suddenly Akito hates her. Suddenly Hiro hates her. It's a very real fear, once Kisa's mom starts getting stressed about the not-talking, that Kisa's mom is going to stop loving her just like everyone else is suddenly doing. Because that's literally what's happening to Kisa.

Tohru's not just a warm, loving, accepting, motherly presence. Tohru's someone who can very viscerally relate to Kisa's terror. Of course Kisa clings to her.

Back to Hiro though!

I think we could also stand to apply to Hiro the tried-and-true, "The things you hate most in other people are the things you hate most about yourself," because it is both true in general and a definite thing Fruits Basket does (for a quick example, see Yuki saying he hates dependent people [while Kyou's like "that's you tho"] and Rin hating Yuki [because he's dependent on Haru the way she is guiltly dependent on Haru]).

I went to rewatch the episode to look at all the specific things Hiro says about Tohru and other people, only to realize the obvious flaw that like everything he says is an insult and there's too much there for me to unpack here, so I chose just a few statements that were really specifically phrased (I can't stand people who X).

I can't stand people who let themselves be pushed around so easily

Hiro also talks a couple times about Tohru having no sense of identity or agency, or not having thoughts of her own. So this reveals Hiro's inner struggle with his own complacency. He's got that bond with Akito, he's got a life that's at least partly set in stone already for him, and he's not doing anything to fight it. He didn't hide his feelings for Kisa from Akito, and then when Kisa got hurt Hiro never told her why ("It's my fault because I told Akito I like you and that made him mad, it's nothing you did") and never called Akito out on it (he can't blame Akito but when he talks about it you can tell he also knows he should blame Akito because Hiro can figure out that that was wrong. Maybe because, unlike so many others of the Zodiac, he was raised in a sensible and loving family and he knows that Akito's behavior isn't normal, isn't right, isn't acceptable).

This is probably why, even while using "I'm just a kid" to get away with his behavior, he's so frustrated with not being an adult. Because, to him, an adult wouldn't just let these things happen. He's wrong, on one hand, but on the other hand the maturity that will come with his personal growth will let him be the kind of adult he envisions.

I can't stand inconsiderate people

Hiro knows he's a jerk. He knows his snappy retorts piss people off--he enjoys that. He's super jealous about Tohru and doesn't care about her feelings, and him taking his anger out on Tohru has been hurting Kisa's feelings and that hasn't caused Hiro to check himself yet either.

He knows this, he hates this, he's not ready to deal with it yet and exercise self-control, so he's the niceness police about other people being rude.

(I think it's interesting that, when Hiro starts maturing, even though he still has that tendency to rudeness, there's also a hint that it will one day turn into a frankness that isn't just "a blunt insult is the same as honesty right?" That time when Hiro realizes that Kyou and Tohru have Feelings and he's like "Um, wait, is that okay? Are we just not going to talk about the fact that Kyou is going to be locked up alone in a room for the rest of his life???" He asks the tough questions lol. I won't give him credit for bringing up Tohru's dad issues because he was just doing that to be a dick, there was zero maturity there. In another world, though, he would've been the only other person besides Kyou [who already knew the details] to think to question Tohru about it.)

People who whine about their situation while accepting no responsibility are so irritating

Again...Hiro hates the whole situation that happened with Kisa, and hates his part in it, and didn't do anything to fix it before Tohru came along. And even then, he still hasn't fessed up to Kisa about the real circumstances. He knows he owes Kisa that, and he hasn't taken responsibility yet.

This ties into the complacency issue, but with the added fact that Hiro's said it's shitty and unfair but still is going along with it without trying to stop it. So he's an extra jerk, but he still hasn't stepped up yet.

I think maybe this is why Tohru's speech touches him, even after he just called her out on magical Mary Sue emotional healing powers. He's been nothing but his worst self around Tohru--bad enough that it's not only just Tohru but Kisa he's been upsetting as well--he's been bratty and insulting and pushed Tohru around and stolen her property and treated her like shit and--

And instead of rolling her eyes, or getting fed up and firing back, or any other response that show her low expectations for Hiro…

Tohru just stands there and says it's brave, to admit you have flaws, and that she has faith that he can and will make good on his responsibilities. Even though nothing at all that Hiro's done--and he's very well aware of this--gives any indication that he would even try. Let alone succeed.

The way that Hiro, when people call him a brat, tends to then embrace it and get even brattier--this makes me think he's the kind of kid who lives down to people's expectations, rather than trying to prove them wrong. So when Tohru without hesitation sets the bar high like that, and it pisses Hiro off--

He's gonna show you, stupid woman. You think he's a prince? You're gonna be floored at the kind of prince he'll be.

(Eventually. Much later.)

[botan-shirabuki]

Soi and Mitsuhide SFW/NSFW headcanons 😭💖

I would get hit by a bus for these two. They don't have to be in danger or anything, just in general.

SFW

-They're generally very well liked by the people in town, so when word got out that they were together, most people were so happy for them. Soi's favorite grocer even gave her a congratulatory discount the day they found out. Soi gets embarrassed by all the attention, but Mitsuhide takes it in stride. After all, when you've got It...you've Got It.

-Soi is a total geek-ass dweeb nerd about food. Like, yeah duh, she's a chef but it goes deeper than that. She reads so much about food and how recipes work that she can list trivia off the top of her head. Whenever her and Mitsuhide eat together, she'll usually begin each meal with some Fun Facts™ about what they're eating. Mitsuhide is so wholly enamoured with everything she tells him so he just sits and listens intently. If he asks her a really good question she goes !!!!! And she starts to go off on a tangent. He has to remind her that they're about to eat sometimes so the food doesn't go cold.

-Mitsuhide kept his love for cats from her for quite a while. "I wanted you to have sex with me." When she found out, she started feeding stray cats along with him. Her cat voice is nowhere near the level of his, but she tries her best. She actually used to be low-key scared of cats after she saw one maul a rabbit when she was younger, but seeing a herd of them around Mitsuhide being cute and fuzzy and meowing helped her get over that.

-Once they get to Sakamoto, they got the opportunity to foster a mother cat who had an injured leg and her kittens back to good health. It was a really hectic time in the castle because the kittens ended up being pretty energetic and many of their retainers ended up chasing them all around. But everyone in the castle grew so attatched to them so some of their retainers and maids ended up taking the kittens home themselves once they were old enough. Soi and Mitsuhide kept the mother and one of the kittens themselves until [DATA EXPUNGED]

-Speaking of the cats, Soi gets to hear all of his corny jokes that they do. Sometimes he'll feed the cats alone so he can practice getting the punchline right before he tries them on her. The thing is, Soi finds the way that he tells the joke funnier than the joke itself. If he finds a joke particularly funny and no one else is around, he'll be chuckling to himself and then he'll stop. And then he'll think about it and start laughing again. And then he'll get her attention; so she turns around, trying to act like she hasn't heard him snickering to himself, and asks him what is it. He proceeds to tell her a joke that she's heard before (maybe even delivered better) but the way he's clearly trying so hard not to crack up and ruin it makes her double over every time. Mitsuhide assumes he killed that shit and they both laugh together. Everyone wins!

-he loves playing with her hair. It's so soft and is such a pretty color when it catches the sunlight. He often runs his fingers through it and will tuck it behind her ears and set it back in its place when it gets messed up by the wind or Inuchiyo. Sometimes if they're sitting outside together he'll start braiding it, though it usually unravels. He can only imagine what it was like when it was long.

-They end each day by talking to each other about how their days went over tea and snacks. It's such a nice stress relief for the two of them and a guaranteed way for them to spend time with each other no matter how eventful their days are.

-Soi has the STRONGEST legs from how good she's gotten at jumping to conclusions. She doesn't mean to, but Mitsuhide means so much to her that her mind tends to go all over the place when he leaves any questions unanswered. Mitsuhide has no problem answering them when she confronts him though. He thinks she's cute when she realizes she was being overdramatic.

-It's a whole part-time job keeping Soi out of danger, whether it's holding her up when she trips on something, or keeping her from throwing a gourd full of deer piss at some scoundrels while they're visiting the capital. Soi gets very embarrassed and frustrated by him always needing to save her or stop her bc she doesn't want him to think of her as less than, or as a child he needs to babysit. Of course, Mitsuhide doesn't mind. Though he often looks exasperated or stressed out by these situations, he admires how impulsive she is. He doesn't want to see her hurt, of course, but that look of self-righteous determination she gets before she does something without thinking is one of his favorites.

-Soi is a very Sensitive Soul, but she tends to hold in her emotions. They've had to really work on communicating properly so that they don't get hung up on minor misunderstandings. Especially after Mitsuhide absolutely slam dunked on Soi's feelings for him. And when she was down, he proceeded to stomp on them, steam roll them, panini press them, tap dance and then finally crip walk on them. She's still not over that so they're working through it. Mitsuhide takes extra care not to hurt her anymore than that, because nothing ruined him like the look on her face at that teahouse 😔

NSFW

-They're both the most stressed people you'll ever meet (Mitsuhide from work and Soi from raw, unfiltered neurosis) and they've become each other's favorite form of stress relief. Those aforementioned nightly visits often escalate very quickly.

-Growing up, Soi never had an actual idea of what sex was. She knew it was something that couples did and that it was a section of the bookstore she wasn't allowed in. So at first, she was very hesitant to do anything too crazy with him even though they were a couple so in theory it was okay, but she didn't know what it would lead to or what the end goal was, if not a baby. But then Mitsuhide made her cum for the first time and she was like "OH THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN MISSING OUT ON!!!!!" And she's been a bust down ever since.

-They both dedicate themselves to being the perfect lover. Soi has finally steeled herself to go into the forbidden section of the bookstore and pick up relevant editions of The Lover's Guide. She's that girl who practices facial expressions and flattering positions in the mirror. Mitsuhide also reads All The Books. He's learned not to take advice from Nobunaga, Katsuie, or Hideyoshi because none of their tips are really His Style™. He also often finds himself thinking about how he can use his training to better his performance.

-They both masturbate (also, Mitsuhide taught her how to touch herself) during long bouts where they don't get to see each other. When they finally get to see each other again they're both really bashful, but Soi will end up blurting out that she thought about him while she did and then she'll kick herself for letting that slip out because she doesn't want to come across as desperate. But after a moment, he'll be like "Oh good, I thought of you too!"

-They're very sexually intense people. The sheer level of smoulder between them is INSANE. It's like when they're intimate, it's as if there aren't enough things they can do to show how much they love each other. It isn't enough to just fuck her through the floor. It isn't enough to leave her covered in hickeys and bruises. Soi likes to feel like he's trying to murder her with his dick. She also tends to cry when it's that good, but it's never from sadness. Mitsuhide has learned to just keep fucking her through it until she's nice and sated again 😌

-While Soi does like it rough, she doesn't want him to say anything degrading or mean. Mitsuhide will tell her she's beautiful after he slaps her. Or he'll tell her how good of a job she's doing while he fucks her face. Positive reinforcement is key :) Also, he never leaves any orifices sore because he's learned the RIGHT way to do all this. And he'd never forgive himself if he hurt her in a way that was truly unpleasant.

-Mitsuhide never speaks a single word about what they do to anyone in the castle. He would never put her on blast like that bc it's corny. However, Soi does have Oichi and a few maids that she's close with that she confides in. She intended to keep it secret too, but of course she went and accidentally implied that she likes auto-erotic asphyxiation so the cat was out of the bag. As far as she's concerned, her business is safe with them, though.

-Ever since she has become Aware, Soi has become a royal tease. Nothing too dramatic, she just knows what looks to give him and how to move while she serves Lord Nobunaga's dessert to make his resolve and self control go *Roman Holiday noises*. He gets her back every time without fail.

-They aren't exhibitionists, but they do often end up fucking in risky public/semi-public places (i.e., that dungeon, on the veranda, in an alley at night, on a balcony, in an empty room in the middle of the day......if you fuck on the shores of Lake Biwa and nobody is around, did it really happen?)

-Mitsuhide is a switch, and they've toyed with the idea of changing things up, but Soi would want nothing more than to give him the equal amount of pleasure that he gives her, and she doesn't trust her physical ability to do so. She's also not that good with rope and dildos are intimidating. They've decided that it's best to let her lead the way and tell him exactly what she wants (which btw, took her SO LONG to be able to do bc she's got so many hang ups lol). It's really helped her figure out what she really wants and likes. And although she usually just ends up requesting that he manhandles her anyway, it's reassuring to both of them that she chose for it to be that way.

[korora12]

Ladybug Week Day 4 - Vacation

Minor content warning: the rules of ladybug week asked that everything remain sfw, and I believe I did that; everyone’s clothes stay on and nothing explicit is described. That being said, this chapter does contain the kind of frank and open conversations about sex and boundaries that are important to a healthy relationship. Again, nothing explicit, but if talking about it makes you squeamish, then you’ve been warned.

Day 3 Day 5

Word Count: 2055

 The crew of the Crescent Rose had elected to take a week off. As far as vacations went, it wasn’t much. They didn’t really have enough funds to go anywhere nice, but a week without having to worry about keeping the ship running or finding their next job was enough of a stress relief to be worth it.

Yang had taken Weiss out on Bumblebee, giving Ruby and Blake the run of the ship. They’d started out trying to binge-watch a holo-series adaptation of a book they’d both read, the two of them leaning against each other in the ship’s common room, watching the projection. Unfortunately, despite having been wanting to watch the show for months, Blake was having a hard time following along. Instead, her thoughts were plagued by the woman at her side.

Ruby wasn’t just her captain anymore. She was her girlfriend now, but the change was so recent that they hadn’t yet figured out what that meant. The two of them had developed a deep connection almost from the beginning, going from being strangers to reading each other’s minds in record time. They weren’t the same person, not even close, and yet the same things made them laugh. The same things made them cry. The same things hurt them.

Blake craved that kind of relationship with someone, and had been overjoyed when Ruby had blown past all her defenses and asked to take the next step. But now she found herself fumbling that step and was suddenly terrified of ruining everything. The couple had a profound emotional bond, and Blake had thought that would be enough, but now she found herself struggling with the day-to-day parts of having a girlfriend. All the little things, stuff she used to consider shallow surface-dressing, were turning out to be more important than she’d expected. Blake was supposed to be the mature, experienced one, but she really only had one past relationship to draw on, and that was more a lesson about what not to do with, or accept from, a person. She found herself left with so many questions that she didn’t know the answers to.

When is it okay to hold her hand? How long can they cuddle for? Is it okay to share a bathroom? A shower? A bed? When should she treat Ruby like her girlfriend and when is it better to treat her like her boss?

“Can I kiss you?”

Blake turned her head and locked eyes with Ruby. Her chin was perched on Blake’s shoulder, face centimeters away. It looked like she’d been dealing with her own stream of thoughts.

Blake gave the idea a moment of consideration before nodding her consent, turning her body for a better angle. Ruby leaned in, pressing her mouth against Blake’s own. She felt something wet touch her lips and she opened them, letting Ruby inside.

Blake had been kissed before, but never like this. Not like in her books. In the past, kisses had been rough, possessive, almost violent; a quick meeting to remind her who she belonged to. This one was different, softer and more timid. Ruby tasted like…

Well, she tasted like tongue. And saliva. And a little bit of the breakfast they’d shared that morning. It wasn’t like she’d read; there was no fire in her belly or tremble in her knees. There was just a tongue inside her mouth. Ruby seemed happy, though, smiling when she finally pulled back, and that was enough to make Blake happy.

“You seemed distracted,” Ruby said.

Blake nodded. “I keep thinking about us.”

“You want to turn this off and talk about it?”

Blake glanced at the images projected into the air. One of the characters was in the middle of a stare-down with a wild boar. She didn’t remember the scene from the book, nor did she have any idea how they got to that point. “Yeah,” she agreed, and the images disappeared.

Despite agreeing to talk, Blake found herself struggling with what to say next. Ruby, however, didn’t seem to have the same difficulty, taking Blake’s hands in her own before speaking. “I think communication is the most important part of maintaining a healthy relationship. So if you have any questions or concerns, you can always ask or tell me them. Nothing’s too personal.” She stopped abruptly, as if interrupted by her own thoughts. “Oh,” she continued, “but if you’re not comfortable talking about something yet, that’s fine. Just say so, and I won’t push.”

“OK,” Blake said. She took a deep breath to calm her wild nerves and racing pulse. Then, taking the plunge and not letting herself rethink it, she asked the first question that came to mind. “Have you ever been with anyone else?”

“A few times,” Ruby answered, not hesitating at all. “There was never anything serious, though. Just a few flings that lasted a week or two before falling apart. Never anything like this.” Her face took on a slightly pink tinge. “Or, did you mean sexually?”

Blake hadn’t meant that; she’d been more concerned with the thought of there being any exes she needed to look out for. But now she was curious. “Have you?”

Ruby squirmed a bit, but answered anyway. “Yeah, during some of those flings.”

“What’s it like?” Blake asked. Every species treated sex after their own fashion; the differences were extremely evident when you read romance novels as often as Blake did. Humans in particular seemed to treat it like the greatest thing in the universe.

“I’m probably not the best person to ask that,” Ruby answered, her blush fading. “It’s fun, but I don’t find it as sacred as everyone else seems to. I usually use the metaphor that sex is like milkshakes. There’s lots of different kinds, and as long as no one’s forcing it down your throat, milkshakes are great. Sometimes you have one by yourself, other times you want to share one with someone else. But milkshakes aren’t a necessary part of life; I like them, but I could also live without them. And If you don’t like milkshakes, then I won’t ask you to have any.” Ruby blinked several times, something Blake had come to recognize as a sign that her thoughts had suddenly been pulled in some new direction. “Metaphors aside, I’m really craving a strawberry milkshake right now.”

Blake chuckled. Ruby’s mind was unpredictable at nearly all times, but the tangents it took her on were often amusing to watch.

Ruby had been open with her, so Blake decided to return the favor without being asked. “I can have sex,” she said. “All the right parts are there. But I don’t get anything out of the process.” As far as Blake knew, no FAUNIS did. Humans had made a species that looked like themselves, and were able to have sex, but didn’t enjoy it. There weren’t a whole lot of reasons she could think of for them to do that, and none of them were good. “So while there’s nothing physically stopping me from being with a partner, the idea makes me uncomfortable. I’m sorry I can’t do that for you.”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Ruby told her, placing her hand on the center of Blake’s chest, right over her core. “You haven’t done anything wrong.” After a moment, she seemed to notice where her hand had ended up. “Is this okay?”

Blake considered their situation for a moment. “It’s frustrating,” she answered. Ruby pulled her hand back, but Blake caught it before it got far and returned it. “No,” she said, “not that. We used to be physically affectionate all the time. We didn’t need to ask, it just happened naturally. But now that we’ve put a name to what we are, we keep second-guessing ourselves. It feels like we’re trying to fit ourselves in a box that wasn’t made for us. You can touch me Ruby; your body has never made me uncomfortable.”

Ruby blushed again, even brighter than when they’d been talking about sex, but she didn’t try to pull away. “I’m scared of hurting you,” she said. “You haven’t talked about it much, but I can tell there was someone in your past who hurt you. I don’t know what they did, and I don’t know what might remind you of them, so I try to be careful and ask.”

Blake didn’t respond right away. She hadn’t talked about that man because she’d been trying to move on. She didn’t want to let him control her life anymore, so she’d done her best to forget him. If she never thought about him, then it was like he’d never existed.

Pretending that the past had never happened, it seemed, didn’t actually mean it hadn’t changed her.

“His name was Adam,” she finally said. Her eyes dropped to the couch, old memories playing in front of them. Taking comfort in Ruby’s closeness, she continued. “He was abusive, but more emotionally than physically. He was controlling and demanding, and sometimes he’d hit me if I didn’t listen to him. It took me years to get away from him.” She found herself absentmindedly caressing Ruby’s knuckles. “You’re nothing like him. I don’t have anything to fear from you.”

Ruby’s smile returned, and everything was okay again. The past faded back into the fog of time and memory, and there was only the present left in the room. Blake took a deep breath and let it all soak in, carefully committing the moment to memory and marking it as precious.

“Have any other questions?” Ruby asked. “I’m not going anywhere, if you do.”

“Now that you mention it,” Blake said, feeling a mischievous smile take over her face, “there is one thing about the human body that fascinates me.” She pressed a finger against Ruby’s side and dug in just a little bit, wiggling it around as she did. Ruby screamed with laughter and tried to get away. “Ticklishness is such a strange thing. It doesn’t really make sense for it to evolve naturally.” She continued to torment Ruby, following her as she tried to escape. Eventually Ruby managed to grab her hands and make her stop, gasping for breath as she did. Blake didn’t let this dampen her mood at all. “Now, I’m not ticklish myself, so there’s no way for you to get back at me.”

Ruby’s face sombered a bit, which hadn’t been Blake’s intention. She seemed to be considering something carefully, her eyes searching for something in Blake’s face as she thought. Once her breath evened out, she spoke. “You aren’t ticklish and you don’t like sex. Is there any way that you do enjoy your body?”

Blake’s upper ears stood up straight, not having expected the question. She turned her hands over, idly returning Ruby’s grasp as she considered her response carefully, thinking of all the things she liked in the universe.

“This might sound strange, but I like being tired. I like going all out, until I don’t have energy left to even move. I like sleeping somewhere warm and safe. I like trying new foods and eating until my batteries are full, then getting up and doing it all over again.” She pulled one of Ruby’s hands towards her to press it gently against her cheek. “I like touching you. It’s not sexual, it’s just… comfortable. Warm.”

Ruby responded by leaning forward and placing her forehead against Blake’s. “I think I know what you mean.” She pushed forward a little more, and the two fell backwards together, Ruby curled in a ball on top and still holding Blake’s hands in her own.

Blake hummed, a sound that came from the depths of her chest, content with their new situation. They lay together for a while, neither wanting to risk breaking the moment with words. Eventually, Ruby was the first to speak. In a voice so quiet it barely reached Blake’s ears, meant for her and no one else, she whispered, “We should go on a picnic tomorrow. We can race along the riverside, nap together in the sun, and stuff ourselves with food.”

“Sounds like a date,” Blake returned. She placed a small kiss atop Ruby’s head. Any world that allowed a woman like Ruby to exist couldn’t be such a bad place, Blake decided.

[grimnoire87]

I feel like people need to understand U.S. history to get why American minorities are very stressed about the possibility of a draft or a war with Iran. It is extremely frustrating to see how few people actually put effort into learning this even though they regularly make general criticisms about the US. Even a basic comprehension of U.S. current events would prepare someone to understand this. White Americans might be victimizing themselves but the rest of us are worried for a different reason and it needs to be recognized. And if you recognize it you probably can also understand why we bristle at the implication that we only benefit from a system that was built around enslaving or killing us or people who look like us, or why its so wrong to equate Soleimani to a black victim of police brutality.

People are able to have generalized discussions of US white supremacy and Imperialism but only in a way that reflects the last 50 years and only in a manner that treats it as just an external problem that never effects us here. Which is why folks sound so tone deaf when they talk about "Americans".

U.S. white supremacy was not built around fascism or the desire to police the rest of the world. Nor is Imperialism a US creation. Both takes are neo liberal ways to avoid responsibility and completely ahistorical.

Some context (warning, this will be a long post and might get redundant at times but I promise that there is a reason for it.):

Edited because I finally figured out how to install a break

The U.S. was, at one point, and English colony. It was "The New World" aka a just another colony in a long line European Imperialism. French, Spanish, and Dutch "explorers" also were making a mark on the continent. They were using and killing indigenous people and importing enslaved black people. Black and Native people have always been the first and most longstanding victims of U.S. agression. After the Revolutionary War, the new U.S. continued to expand, engaging in genocide against Black and Native peoples for hundreds if years. While the U.S. would eventually seek to expand its borders on the continent, in the beginning it was rather isolationist in regards to world affairs. Like Australia, their white supremacy was almost entirely "local" due to the nature of its origin, it wasn't powerful enough to take over entire countries on the other side of the world but it was powerful enough to murder and enslave people here .

White supremacy was central to that white American identity. American Exceptionalism and Manifest Destiny (and US Imperialism in general) sprung from this new identity as a "White Christian Nation". Its similar to how the "White Man's Burden" was used to justify British Imperialism in Africa and Asia.

That was a tangent but...anyways. U.S. identity has always been fostered by the idea of the "other". For whiteness to function it needs an other or a scapegoat. And how does this relate to the fear if another war? Well all you have to look at the Civil War.

Black people were made into scapegoats on both sides. The Draft Riots were race riots where Irish draftees went out and burned a black orphanage and killed men, women and children. It got worse after that war ended. Black people in the North were scapegoated for the war, draft, and taking lower paying jobs. In the South, they were scapegoated for the loss of the economic and political power that came from slavery. Thus white resentment led to black people being tortured and terrorized by their white neighbors. They hunted us. This would be a common pattern, and would happen anytime white people felt anxiety over a war, economic problems, loss of political power, etc. They would ride out and sooner or later a black person, family, or entire town would be lynched. We were surrounded by a majority who could do what they wanted to us.

It was the same thing after WWI. Black vets would come home and wind up being the sole defense against white mobs numbering in the hundreds. The Red Summer consisted of massacre after massacre. There were no consequences for the perpetrators. Survivors were put in camps or prison, none would be compensated. And yes, by this point U.S. imperialism had allowed white Americans to continue to slaughter Natives and steal Mexico, and go beyond its shores to start wars to see which Imperialist nation could colonize where.

The U.S. has loved scapegoating "others" to justify limiting rights, expanding its borders, taking resources and supporting white supremacy. It was as American as apple pie. Look at the Japanese Internment. When Timothy McVeigh committed the Oklahoma City bombing, no one blamed white fundamentalists. He was seen as an individual.

That's not what happened in 2001. On Sept. 11, 2001, after a cowardly attack that killed close to 3,000, white anxiety would lead to the scapegoating of another community in a manner similar to how black people were scapegoated for the Civil War. It didn't matter that this mass murder was orchestrated by Saudi Arabia, "9/11 was committed by Muslims", therefore it was open season. Regardless of the fact that Muslims died in the attack and were the primary victims of these terrorist groups in the Middle East. They were at fault simply because they appeared to be "Muslim". And the US already had an issue with Islam because of its role in black civil rights. So that attack just made it worse and shifted the vitriol away from black Muslims and towards all Muslims. Folks would go out and hunt for Muslims and people would justify it. Mosques were being targeted in a manner similar to black churches in the South. They were criminalized into terrorists. And the Iraq War would only make this worse and create refugees that would come here and be scapegoated all over again. After the Pulse shooting white people railed against Muslims and Black Lives Matter, but Dylann Roof was just one person.

We have had laws passed that scrapped civil liberties, Trump had a Muslim travel ban list, ICE is actively detaining and deporting brown and black people, and modern weaponry and lax gun laws allow people to commit mass murder on a scale never seen before. White supremacists and Islamophobes have already killed people for "looking like Muslims". Black people are being killed by the thousands every year and we have to convince people we don't deserve to be murdered. People going out and assaulting/killing Jewish people. There is a lot to be anxious about over because white American aggression is not purely an external problem.

White anxiety and scapegoating gets people killed. Daily. And white Americans (just like Europeans) LOVE to take their frustrations out on a scapegoats and always have. Because U.S. white supremacy is built around the idea that whiteness entitles you to privilege and if you lack it than its someone else's fault and you have the right to hurt them for it.

And that is a very stressful reality when you are a minority surrounded by people with the privilege and power to harm you whenever they feel a little anxious. Especially when you have someone like Trump in power (unlike Obama he surrounded himself with white supremacists, courts them, and sics them on people). It doesn't matter whether there is a war or just an escalation of tensions. No matter whether there is a draft or not, you always be vulnerable to a white supremacist with an assault rifle who can walk into a Mosque and murder you by the dozen. U.S. history has set a precedent.

And imagine the horror of a draft! Imagine everyone between the ages of 18-35 being told they are in a lottery and if picked have to go to war (and potentially commit war crimes) or go to jail in a country that loves for profit prisons, locks up minorities, kills black and Native detainees and pardons people who murder prisoners of war. Use common sense. It is perfectly reasonable to be nervous about a draft here and you can't call people immoral for joining the military and then turn around and call kids selfish for being scared of being forced to do so. And a draft would only fan the flames of white resentment here just like what happened during the earlier drafts. There would be war crimes against Iranians, for sure. A draft would be awful. No one should be joking about it. It would be horrifying.

I was vague about it before because I figured that asking for empathy would be enough but it isn't. A lot of people talking about the Suleiman strike are far removed from U.S. white supremacy and don't necessarily understand our anxieties and it shows in how they talk about the situation and who "benefits". The fact that they think American minorities (especially Muslims) won't face *any* backlash or consequences for Trump's actions here is evidence enough.

This isn't an attempt to paint Americans into the victim of this situation with Iran. To do so would be despicable. And joking about it is in poor taste and can come off as cruel even if US minorities do it to cope with our reality here.

But acknowledging that U.S. minorities (including Iranian and Iraqi immigrants and refugees) will be at risk isn't taking away from Iranians or Iraqis in the Middle East. American minorities are here because of U.S. and European Imperialism. And it is a fact that Imperialism will lead to more deaths in an already traumatized region and it is a fact that white supremacy will put people in a precarious position here where they are more vulnerable to white aggression all year round. Both are true. Its not a competition and seeing US minorities talk about it shouldn't be bothering you because both are symptoms of the same problem.

Kind of a tl;dr: American minorities aren't being selfish (or US centric) by talking about their fears of war with Iran and a draft because many will be more vulnerable than they already are and U.S. history has demonstrated why these fears are valid. Learn it. It explains a lot of why we do what we do. Also a draft would terrible for Americans and devastating for Iranians (i.e. look at Vietnam). There us a difference between white Americans victimizing themselves and American PoC being worried about what this situation means for them. Learn the difference; those disclaimers are necessary for a reason. You dont show someone empathy by denying it to others, I wish more progressives figured this out. Its not a competition or ideological chess. People could and probably will die and its scary to be surrounded by angry white people just looking for an excuse (like a war).

[sartrecamus2018-blog]

2018 Review

Welcome back to the second part of my greatly anticipated 2018 Review; in part 1 we looked at my favourite film and music from this year, but now I look at all the social events that taken place this past year. It’s been a varied year to say the least but I wouldn’t really change any of it - the payoff at the end was more than worth the mediocre time before that. Before I get to my award let me have a quick look back at the year:

Firstly, the opening couple of months were still being affected by the dumpster fire of drama that came at the end of 2017, which was tiring to say the least. As soon as it seemed over something else cropped up and all the unnecessary drama began again. It took its toll on me, no way was I going to get involved in something like that again. Fortunately at this time, the band was really starting to come together, meaning I spent a lot of my time doing research on songs, and learning how to play them. That took my mind off so much and was a real help. It would be wrong of me not to mention how big of a deal the offer from Exe was, which arrived in mind March; this was my dream place, and it gave something to really aim for during study leave and revision throughout term 3. That was  quite the drag to say the least, and was more or less completely forgettable apart from Eminem helping me through the most torturous of times. I owe him a lot for that. Exams finish and summer comes and I leave my humble abode to travel a few thousand miles away for a job that I didn’t get, so was left stranded for 10 weeks... Fortunately Spotify and later Netflix got me through, as did the light at the end of the tunnel - university; I must have thought about and hyped up university an incredible amount in those few months. To say I had to grind through those long weeks was an understatement, but I guess what came afterwards made up for it. The slight bump was results day which was an unqualified failure, to say I was robbed would be an understatement. I’m sure there’s a parallel world where I get in and things go swimmingly, but I wouldn’t dare trade that for what I have now. I guess it just wasn’t meant to be. After sulking for a bit I got off my arse and decided to join a little group chat for my course, commenting on someone’s post who meant nothing to be at time - how things change.I truly believe this has a huge role to play in what happened when I finally got there. I had joined an Exe group chat and had a lot of fun on that, so it was weird with all these new people; then again, I knew when to limit my perhaps less endearing qualities. That said, I started talking about how Disney films made me ball my eyes out 5 minutes into a group call, so I don’t know if I really stuck to the plan. This was the second group call, and the first one saw me being far more “cool”, or so I thought. I cannot stress enough how different things might have been if I hadn’t joined that chat, or if one of the more important members hadn’t taken a leap of faith had joined it too. The chat really kept me going through the last few weeks before we started. So we start and freshers week is a blast and totally unlike anything I had ever experienced; the freedom and the opportunity and the freshness of it all just totally blew me away. But aside from the big nights out, there were small things that really made it special - walking round campus with a couple of people from the group chat was almost surreal - I couldn’t believe I was actually there. Those two people I formed quite an attachment with over the following weeks - how can you not when you’re sharing late and wild club nights, along with the occasional kitchen-drinking-session until the early hours of the morning. One of two piccolo sessions saw a tally of cheek begin, it may have started with one person, but it ended with another running far ahead. It was magical to say the least, like properly incredible stuff; then it began to get better, suddenly going over to watch Netflix became naps together, laying in bed listening to Spotify, twirling hands in one another. Saying goodbye at 3 in morning was steadily becoming a more and more long-winded process. We both tried to suppress what we were feeling, I think, but thinking about it now, it was pretty obvious wasn’t it? There’s something remarkably special about that calm before the storm; maybe it was the emotional tension between Vince and Precious or between Vince and Howard that sealed the deal. “Do you love me?”, hmm, “Can you learn to love me?”, I’d like that. Then on the most expected of nights - the visiting of one ELF - things were sealed. But first, maybe it was her endearing qualities that made me think that I’d quite like this family, or her reckless attitude that sort of worn off on me, and made go do what I did. I’ve now complimented her than the actual subject of this, so let me tell you what I was in for: someone who is, above all, her own person and won’t ever change that. She can be snarky and teasing, but ultimately has the most caring and loving heart; her interests are so very much her, whether it be the somewhat childish indulgences of one particular franchise, or truly challenging music. She is honestly the most full and fascinating person I have come across, who still manages to surprise me. I’m going to have fun trying to figure her out for however long I’m allowed.

Okay that was a tangent haha... oh dear. Anyways! So that Thursday, well what more needs to be said other than it went above the magic of the previous month to a level that’s really only been achieved once before. It was proper 0 AD, starting point, life-begins-here kind of stuff, the kind of which I’m feel so privileged to experience. So in the early hours of the morning, outside on a picnic field our outsides were freezing but inside I don’t think I’ve ever been filled with so much warmth. The circumstances may have not been perfect, but the moment was, and gosh I wish that conversation was written down, because I think it might be the most beautiful conversation I’ve been involved. Goosebumps just thinking about it. When we released her looked at each other again, she looked remarkably different. The rest of the night was just perfect - no sleep, and getting to spend it with her tired and confused but feeling more emotion than I had for a very, very long time. It’s a night I’m going to tell the story of for a long, long time to come. Best night of my life? Yeah go on, what’s to lose. ❤

Two and a bit months on from that... woah hold there, let’s take it slow.

So November comes and wow that I don’t think I’ve spent more time with anyone in one period of time. But I’m not complaining, anything but. I can gladly say I’ve shed all of my “firsts” in the month. The first kiss was a bit of a disaster really, but I’ll take it, the emotion and need was pretty incredible. We became a lot better at it, to be fair. Some things started off really well, and well, have only managed to get better and better. A lot of the nights were just spent with Netflix and Spotify and some food and I wouldn’t dare ask for more. It may sound somewhat basic, but those nights will always be the best, and we had a lot of them. There were a couple of more adventurous nights; the Yule Ball, for one, was like the prom I never had, and the kisses in the middle of this grand old building were nothing short of perfect. McDonald's and Subway dates were also a real highlight. November rolls into December and, writing this now, I’m beginning to find it hard to distinguish one perfect night from the next - not a complaint, once again. The final week becomes the final night, and with the help of Billy Mack and co. made it a genuinely perfect night. that ended with us asleep in each others arms. It was beyond beautiful.

When we reunite we would have been apart for four weeks.

I’m here on the final might of this frankly awful period of my life having caused so much unnecessary anxiety and stress for me and her. I don’t know whether I deserve to even post this now, or tell her how I can’t live without her. I hate what I’ve done to her, and there will come a time when I’m sure she gets sick of it. There was the night at the hill, the message when she went to get back her tattoo the first time, and now several times where I’ve hidden something from her. I want to promise her I can change, but it hurts every time I break that promise. I hope this is just the blues at the beginning of any relationship, when we’re still getting to grips with what it is like to have someone else to care for, someone else who needs you and relies on you. I’ve never had that before, maybe that’s why I’m so bad at it. Anyone else would have run away by now, I know it, and I almost want to encourage it, for her sake. But if this is the lowest point then I’ll take that, because that means we can only go up from here. I want to do that with her, desperately, and it’s selfish of me to ask for that, I know, because I don’t deserve it. She believes she’s a pain but she really isn’t, she’s totally committed, always honest, and while those gut punches may hurt, that fades and I’m left laughing. I don’t dare laugh in this situation. Of all people, she deserves to be treated the best, and I can honestly say I haven’t done that. I feel guilty, I feel I might be abusing her trust, and I feel like I’m wasting this incredible opportunity. We need a code-word for when I’m not feeling great, like “Kid A” or something.

And now it’s the final night before I return and despite this being the like quite frankly and awful day; I just hope that we can move on from this whole thing. However the reunion happens it’ll be perfect one way or another, and then this will all fade into a distant memory. I know laying with you again will be indescribable.

I’m sorry, I love you. 

[simonxriley]

The ultimate relationship tag for skylar/Tachanka I must know more please. Not sure which ones so you can choose. Its hard to pick which ones again.

You shall know more…a lot more at that!!! And since it’s gonna be very long and I might go on a tangent here and there it’ll be under the cut.

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice?

Probably Alex.

Who threatens to leave but never actually does?

Neither, they work out their shit like responsible mature adults.

Who actually keeps their word and leaves?

Again neither.

Who trashes the house?

No one.

Do either of them get physical?

Hell no. They might raise their voices at each other every now and then, but they would never physically hurt each other.

How often do they argue/disagree?

Very limited.

Who is the first to apologize?

Whoever was the one to start the argument.

Sex:

Who is on top?

Alex.

Who is on the bottom?

Skylar.

Who has the strangest desires?

Probably Skylar, but I can see Alex having some too.

Any kinks?

A few. Blindfolds, handcuffs, dirty talk and ice play.

Who’s dominant in bed?

Alex and Sky loves every bit of it.

Is head ever in the equation?

Always. There’s nothing they like better than going down on each other.

If so, who is better at performing it?

Skylar would say Alex and Alex would say Skylar so…both I guess.

Ever had sex in public?

Yes, a few times actually. And all of them were in Russia. But one time they had sex while the Spetznas and FBI were training together. 

Who moans the most?

Skylar.

Who leaves the most marks?

Alex, poor Sky is usually cover in hickeys or small bruises.

Who screams the loudest?

Skylar.

Who is the more experienced of the two?

Alex.

Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?

Make love, Alex thinks it sounds more romantic.

Rough or soft?

Both!

How long do they usually last?

Alex can last a very long time, unfortunately Skylar cannot. She needs at least a 20 minute break before they start again. 

Is protection used?

Yes. Sky is on birth control, and Alex always has a box of condoms.

Does it ever get boring?

Never. They spice it up every few weeks.

Where is the strangest place they’d have sex?

I can’t really think of any place.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children?

Kids were never really in the equation for them until after they married and Skylar thought about the future one day at a park. 

If so, how many children do your muses want/have?

They both wanted 4 but due to unforeseen fertility issues they only ended up having 2. Their fraternal twins have been nothing more than a blessing to them. A boy names Konstantin Alexsandr  and a girl named Marianna Skylar 

Who is the favorite parent?

Probably Skylar, but that doesn’t mean the twins don’t love their father any less.

Who is the authoritative parent?

Alex!

Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school?

Skylar, and what’s one day off gonna hurt?

Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around?

They both let them indulge every once in a while. Besides it’s no fun eating healthy all the time anyways.

Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children?

They both do if they can. If one of them is working facetime is always the answer.

Who goes to parent teacher interviews?

Skylar, she���s too afraid Alex will say something and get the kids expelled or something.

Who changes the diapers?

Who’s ever the closest.

Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby?

They both do unless the other is away working.

Who spends the most time with the children?

Skylar, cause she postponed going back to work until the kids were a little over a year old.

Who packs their lunch boxes?

Both. 

Who gives their children ‘the talk’?

They both do.

Who cleans up after the kids?

Both unless they are old enough to do it themselves.

Who worries the most?

Alex, surprisingly.

Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from?

Uncle Glaz. And it was blyat, which means fuck in Russian. 

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle?

Skylar, she’s very affectionate and Alex doesn’t mind one bit.

Who is the little spoon?

Skylar, Alex feels better with his arms wrapped around her. Protecting her in a way.

Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?

ALEX. If they have a mission together he’s teasing her during the briefing and maybe even during the ride there.

Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  

Alex, but once their relationship went public Skylar had trouble too.

How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?

A very long time. Alex doesn’t care if his body goes numb, as long as she’s by his side he’s happy.

Who gives the most kisses?

Probably Skylar.

What is their favorite non-sexual activity?

When they’re cleaning their guns together and just talking about anything and everything.

Where is their favorite place to cuddle?

Skylar would say couch and Alex would say bed.

Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?

Both would.

How often do they get time to themselves?

Very often, considering if one of them is on a mission somewhere.

Sleeping:

Who snores?

No one.

If both do, who snores the loudest?

No one.

Do they share a bed or sleep separately?

They share one.

If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?

They start off cozy up’d together but once they’re asleep they kinda drift apart.

Who talks in their sleep?

Alex, and it’s usually in Russian. Occasionally Sky will talk in her sleep too.

What do they wear to bed?

Alex is either in just a pair of sweats or his boxers. Sky wears a pair of shorts and a slightly over-sized shirt.

Are either of your muses insomniacs?

They kinda both are, but more so with Sky.

Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?

Yes, for Sky. The outbreak really did a number on her.

Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?

Sometimes both.

Who wakes up with bed hair?

Skylar since she has longer hair than Alex.

Who wakes up first?

Alex.

Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?

Alex. He LOVES to cook for her.

What is their favourite sleeping position?

Alex doesn’t have one and Sky likes to sleep on her side.

Who hogs the sheets?

Sky.

Do they set an alarm each night?

No, unless they have a mission really early in morning.

Can a television be found in their bedroom?

Nope. They don’t usually spend a lot of time in their room. Only for sleeping and uh baby making.

Who has nightmares?

Sky.

Who has ridiculous dreams?

Surprisingly, Alex.  

Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?

ALEX.

Who makes the bed?

They both do. Do you think Sky’s gonna really make a king sized bed??

What time is bed time?

Whenever. It really depends on what they have going on.

Any routines/rituals before bed?

Just the normal brush your teeth, wash your face.

Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?

No one….well maybe Sky if she hasn’t had a good nights rest.

Work:

Who is the busiest?

Alex.

Who rakes in the highest income?

Alex, only ‘cause he’s older.

Are any of your muses unemployed?

Nope.

Who takes the most sick days?

Sky.

Who is more likely to turn up late to work?

Neither.

Who sucks up to their boss?

Neither.

What are their jobs?

They’re operators for team Rainbow. Or Skylar’s FBI and Alex is Spetsnaz. 

Who stresses the most?

Skylar, especially after the twins were born. 

Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?

They both enjoy their jobs, if they didn’t i don’t think they would be working there. 

Are your muses financially stable?

Yes they are. 

Home:

Who does the washing?

Skylar. 

Who takes out the trash?

Alex. 

Who does the ironing?

No one…who irons anymore??? No one! 

Who does the cooking?

Both, but mostly Alex. 

Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?

Probably Skylar. 

Who is messier?

Skylar. 

Who leaves the toilet roll empty?

Alex and Skylar HATES it. 

Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?

Skylar. 

Who forgets to flush the toilet?

Neither (thank god)

Who is the prankster around the house?

Alex. 

Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?

Skylar. 

Who mows the lawn?

Alex. 

Who answers the telephone?

Both. 

Who does the vacuuming?

Whoever is home when it needs to be done. 

Who does the groceries?

They both do. 

Who takes the longest to shower?

Skylar. 

Who spends the most time in the bathroom?

Skylar. 

Misc:

Is money a problem?

Nope. 

How many cars do they own?

They own 2. 

Do they own their home or do they rent?

They own. One house is in Bangor and the other is in St Petersburg. 

Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside?

In the middle. 

Do they live in the city or in the country?

City. 

Do they enjoy their surroundings?

Yes they do. 

What’s their song?

Go Ahead And Break My Heart by Blake Shelton ft Gwen Stefani and Misery by Gwen Stefani. 

What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Before the twins Skylar would spend her time either training or with Ash and after the twins she would take care of them if Alex was gone. As for Alex he would spend most of his time in his room looking through his phone or training with the rest of the Spetsnaz. But if he has the twins he obviously in father mode. 

Where did they first meet?

At Rainbow’s base in Hereford. 

How did they first meet?

Montagne introduced them. 

Who spends the most money when out shopping?

Skylar. 

Who’s more likely to flash their assets?

Neither. 

Who finds it amusing when the other trips over?

Skylar…..like who wouldn’t be amused to see a big guy like Tachanka trip? 

Any mental issues?

Yes…but I can’t say yet what it is. 

Who’s terrified of bugs?

Skylar. 

Who kills the spiders around the house?

Alex. 

Their favourite place?

Either of their homes. 

Who pays the bills?

They both do. 

Do they have any fears for their future?

Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?

Alex. 

Who uses up all of the hot water?

Skylar. 

Who’s the tallest?

Alex by 8 inches. 

Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?

They both are honestly. But Alex will ask Skylar if it’s alright since she’s a girl and has a lot more to do in the shower than he does. 

Who wanders around in their underwear?

Skylar. 

Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?

Skylar. 

What do they tease each other about?

Alex teases her about how short and cute she is. And Sky will tease him that he’s always on his phone. 

Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?

Neither, they’re both pretty casual. 

Do they have mutual friends?

Yes they do. 

Who crushed first?

ALEX. He feel hard and fast. 

Any alcohol or substance related problems?

Nope. 

Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?

Alex. 

Who swears the most?

Alex, but in Russian. 

[baldysims]

Strange Legacy 3.2

“Hey bro, how was college? Still have all your skills maxed?”

“Oh, Di, it was amazing! You wouldn’t believ--”

“Hang on, I just realized it’s the middle of the day and I somehow failed to get in my coffin and am about to die from sunlight exposure yet again. Hold that thought.”

“But--!”

“We’ll talk about skilling laterrrrrrr! Hissssssss!”

Third generation heir Fornax has returned to the legacy lot and been reunited with his parents and older-but-perpetually-teenaged sister, Diadem. The main household got played a bit while the rest of the kids were at college so I could troubleshoot the whole teen vampire thing with fewer distractions.

It turns out teen vamps are hard, but not that bad when you build them a garage full of snapdragons and give them a fancy sports car to shield them from the sun’s harsh rays on their way to and from school... at least when certain other people aren’t hogging the coffin. *coughCASSIEcough*

Yep, Cassie’s back home too. Why? Well, I wanted a platinum grilled cheese grave for the lot, but I also really didn’t feel like making another Sim eat 200 sandwiches. Sue me.

It’ll be nice to have an extra set of hands around to raise generation 4, though, especially since I’m sure I’ll be pretty distracted a lot of the time with keeping Di alive... in a manner of speaking.

Generation 4 will be here very soon, since Fornax took less than a day to fulfill his lifelong (or at least last-two-years-of-college-long) dream of becoming a rock star. Not bad for a former nerd who never even made out with a girl until after he’d already graduated.

Fornax’s wedding to Danni, the sexy heroic firefighter of his dreams, was thoughtfully held at night so that all members of the Strange family could attend, both living and dead.

Unfortunately this included some family members who probably shouldn’t have been invited, like Uncle Alpheratz.

Ever a man of class, he couldn’t even wait until the reception was over to start trash talking the groom. It’s extra gross when you realize that the woman he’s talking to is his daughter Cursa, who you might remember along with her sister Bellatrix as the tearful, brokenhearted children from the last family wedding Alpheratz ruined.

What have Bells and Cursa been up to since we saw them last, anyway?

Well, Bellatrix married the love of her life, Tybalt Capulet, and became a business tycoon in the family company. She’s angling to get her son, Lucius, named the heir to the Capulet fortune, but I doubt that’ll happen given how matriarchal the Capulets are. Still, she tries. I guess you can take the girl out of the patriarchy, but you can’t take the patriarchy out of the girl.

Cursa moved into Capulet Manor alongside her sister, and immediately began a scandalous May-December romance with Tybalt’s grandfather, Consort. No one in the family has told Betelgeuse about their affair, and for good reason. Bete was raised to believe every Sim in the family must abide by the Strict Family Values and True Love handicaps, regardless of whether they were raised in the main household or not. The knowledge would only hurt him, and clearly, he’s happy in his blissful ignorance.

Bete also doesn’t know that his youngest daughter, Electra, is also keeping certain aspects of her life as a spare a secret from him.

Sure, she locked down a True Love in her college years and married him as soon as humanly possible, just like her parents always dreamed, but given that she and Freddy are a couple of video game-obsessed slackers who can barely put down the handhelds to feed themselves, much less raise a child, I decided to let them embrace the wonders of modern birth control.

And so it seems that Betelgeuse and Angeline’s only grandchildren will be through Fornax and Danni. Speaking of whom, let’s get back to their wedding; I think we’ve gone on more than enough spare-related tangents for one chapter.

Danni Strange, former last name unknown, is a knowledge Sim and former firefighter who is truly, madly, deeply in love with her dork of a husband. She saved his life back in college and the sparks, so to speak, were instant.

Danni’s very well liked by the rest of the Stranges. Cassie used to be the sole holdout, but now that Danni is officially part of the family, she seems to have come around.

It’s shaping up to be a very wholesome generation.

Danni got pregnant right away, and spent the majority of her pregnancy working on maximizing all her skills. She’ll need them, because I want to get the collection point for having all the career rewards this generation.

Danni was game, and dedicated herself so thoroughly to this task that she even gave birth with her skilling hat on.

Little Gomeisa here turned out to be a girl, which gave Betelgeuse a little anxiety. He himself took four tries to have a boy with his wife Angeline, and they ended up cutting it pretty close age-wise. He doesn’t want that stress for his own son, so he urges his son to try for more grandchildren as soon as possible.

Fortunately, that’s not a problem for Fornax and Danni. Their chemistry is through the roof and they basically go at it like rabbits constantly, so it wasn’t long before Danni gave birth to another girl, Hamal.

This did not relieve Betelgeuse’s concerns.

“Son, you realize that only boys can inherit the legacy heirship, right? You have to have at least one, and really, two is best.”

“You think I don’t know that, dad?”

“Of course not, Fornax, but I want to talk you through some of the implications. The only way it’s mathematically possible for you to have an heir and a spare is to have at least two more children.”

“So? That’s fine. I mean, sure, I’m not a Family Sim like you or grandpa, but I’m permaplat and Danni’s definitely up for it.“

“The problem, son, is that there are already seven people in this house. Di can’t move out until your mother and I die, which we’re nowhere close to, and Cassie can’t leave or we lose the grilled cheese grave. Essentially, you’ve only got one more chance to get a boy... and I hope you’ll agree that we should maximize it.”

That’s right, it’s cheesecake time! Betelgeuse himself was a cheesecake twin, so of course he’s aware of this classic legacy strategy.

I actually hate having twins, especially during the toddler years, but Betelgeuse is right -- it only makes sense to double the chance of getting an heir before it’s too late.

And so Danni went through a third, much more difficult pregnancy, while the rest of the household worked as hard as they could on various miscellaneous legacy milestones.

Cassie spent a lot of time tediously job-hopping for various career rewards, and also painted the next generation of Strange family portraits. She herself won’t have an official portrait as a spare, but I thought it would be nice to let her memorialize herself for posterity with a grilled cheese masterpiece.

Betelgeuse finished his memoirs, as demanded by the Storyteller handicap.

He also spent some genie wishes bulking up the family fortune. The Stranges don’t really need money for money’s sake, since they’re already swimming in filthy lucre, but in order to get maximum points they'll need $3,000,000 by generation nine, so every simoleon counts.

Diadem earned all of her point-based scholarships as well as an impossible want point by maximizing her skills. Now that she’s free most nights, she spends a lot of time acting as her nieces’ night nanny.

“Glowing skill milk for Gomeisa! Hissssssssss!“

Unfortunately, I realized too late that I made a big mistake by maximizing Di’s skills as quickly as I did. She’s knowledge, so now that she doesn’t have anything left to learn, the only real big-ticket wants she can satisfy are being scared by ghosts... and ours aren’t exactly cooperative.

“Grandma, scare me! Bleh!”

Grandma Sharon would never, Di. She’s too nice. Sorry. You’ll have to wait for Grandpa Zaniah... and for some reason the only time he ever came out to haunt was to scare your mother during her last pregnancy. Jerk.

Di also tends to get lured by the siren call of the career reward collection, which I foolishly stored out of sight in the backyard. Pretty much every morning I lose track of her until I realize from her red icon that she’s been roasting in the sun.

“You can’t blame me for wanting to live on the edge! It’s what teenagers do! And I’ve been a teenager for decades now.”

Yeah, fair enough.

Finally, the twins come along... and it’s two more statistically improbable girls, Ilkil and Jishui. I was so upset by this revelation that I completely failed to take a decent birth photo. I mean... ugh. The house is as full as full gets, but no one can really go anywhere until either the girls grow up and go to college, or I decide to kill Betelgeuse or Angeline. I really don’t want to have to deal with annoying non-Old Age ghosts this early in the legacy... so that means I’m stuck raising four girls while Fornax and Danni’s adult lifespans get shorter and shorter, unable to be lengthened even by Elixir of Life due to yet more legacy handicaps.

That’s right, little spare, grow up! Grow up in your pajamas with no party and no cake. With all 4+ of you little monsters running around, it’s not like birthdays are going to be anything special around here.

It goes without saying that the whole house is basically living off of cheesecake right now. Betelgeuse made a lot. Just in case.

The sole exception to cheesecake for dinner is when the headmaster comes over for lobster, but even then, Angeline objects.

“Fornax, you don’t need to go to such lengths. Just let me fix BJ a few drinks! We go way back, you know.”

I was pretty sure that was the booze talking, but then this happened:

Well, I’ll be damned! I guess booze really does beat out a home cooked meal. I’ll keep that in mind for my next dinner party.

“Aunt Di, why do me and Hamal have to go to private school and study so hard just to start college early? That sounds boring.”

“Gogo, I’m going to lay some truth on you. Private school is the best thing in life. I mean that, literally. The only joy I get in life anymore is from the occasional report card that barely keeps me out of aspiration failure. Hissssssss!”

Yeah, I think Diadem might be depressed.

To cheer her up, I sent her on a date -- the good, expensive kind, not the Aunt Electra “Just take my $25 so I can get a memory token” kind. The matchmaker conjured up Adam, a store clerk who’s been selling the Stranges clothing and groceries since the dawn of the legacy.

Diadem couldn’t get enough of him. He seemed genuinely fascinated by her stories of being abducted by aliens back before getting vamped, and for once in her life since maximizing her skills, Di felt... passion.

Of course, love in a knowledge Sim vampire tends to express itself in a rather, um, aggressive way, and, well... I just couldn’t resist the aspiration bonus.

Sorry, Adam. I'll try not to burn you to a crisp when the Stranges visit community lots during the day from now on.

After claiming him as a creature of the night, Di claimed her first kiss, just as the sun came up. Away with you into your coffins! Bleh!

Oh, Angeline. Booze for dinner with the headmaster, and now booze first thing in the morning? I get that you picked up certain habits from your mother in law, but did you have to pull Fornax in on the day drinking? He’s been so functional up til now!

“I resent that. I day drink purely out of my own free will, just like you would if you knew you’d be changing diapers until retirement age.”

Sigh... fair enough.

In other news, Cassie continues to pursue various careers in search of all 20+ career rewards. Most of the time I just nab them from the newspaper so she automatically grabs them, but sometimes I let her go all the way to the top.

Something about the sweet mad scientist robot hand just seems right for her, you know?

Anyway, we’re about halfway there as far as the career rewards go. I decided I was sick of them cluttering up my view of the lawn (the Stranges are trashy for sure, but like, rich trashy, not furniture-on-the-lawn trashy), not to mention almost killing Di every morning, so I resolved to spruce the place up with a mausoleum/career reward storage facility. And a greenhouse, because hey, why not go for that extra Seasons point?

We already have most of the fish thanks to Angeline, which is the hard part, so really all that’s left is the wishing well and a few juices. Might as well, right?

“Grandma, why can’t you play red hands with me?”

“Well, Hamal, you’ve got to be a good girl and study for when you become a teenager. And I’ve got to spend all day fishing so that I can get red and pass out on the lawn over and over!”

And so she did! Here, have an ugly photo of the upstairs hall proving that Angeline nabbed us every kind of fish.

And not a moment too soon, because as soon as the first leaves began to show on the crops in the greenhouse, Angeline received a ghostly final visitor.

R.I.P. Angeline Strange, former cute teen downtownie, wife and mother of four, Sim City General Chief of Staff and lifelong alcoholic. You were many things, but most of all fun to play, and I’ll miss you.

Poor Bete. Family Sims take the death of a spouse extra hard, so I was expecting this, but it’s still sad. Especially when his morbid vampire daughter discusses it so bluntly over a game of pool that very night.

I don’t mean to imply that Di didn’t care about her mother’s death. She did, of course! She was probably even closer to Angeline than Betelgeuse was. But Knowledge Sims show it in a different way.

And so Angeline was laid to rest in the upper floor of the mausoleum, where Sharon was already haunting in welcome. Hopefully she’ll have some company soon.

Life went on for the rest of the family, with Betelgeuse still hellbent on getting a grandson out of Danni and Fornax.

Yeah, yeah, she already promised to have more kids once you’re dead, Bete! Give it a (final) rest already!

“Aunt Cassie, do I have to die to get a brother too?”

“No, Gogo, of course not. You’ll just go to college, that’s all. We’re not killing anyone on purpose in this legacy until at least generation 7.”

I’m sure Gomeisa was very comforted to hear that.

In protest, she rolled Romance on her teen birthday, but just like Cassie last generation, I don’t think it suits her.

She is ridiculously uninterested in all the men she meets.

She’d much rather hang out with her younger sisters, especially Hamal, who’s about to join her in teenhood.

Now, I’m not a total monster, of course I let Gomeisa have a first kiss before I sent her off to college. The last thing I want is to force Fornax’s children to relive his grisly fate as an inexperienced child in college. Plus the wishing well we got from joining the garden club makes it so easy, how could I not?

Hmm, Loren Teens, not bad, not bad. Technically he’s part of yet another matriarchal Maxis family, the Tricous, but the Tricou matriarchs are all dead and Loren is ultimately just a descendant of one of the men who married in, so I don’t think Betelgeuse would necessarily object.

Especially since it’s finally his deathday.

R.I.P. Betelgeuse Strange. You did everything you could to continue your father’s legacy, even when you probably shouldn’t have, but I respect the effort. I hope you have fun whaling on Alpheratz in the afterlife.

With Betelgeuse finally dead and gone, Fornax and Danni were free to try for babies #5 and #6. Yes, I’m doubling up again, and if I get two more girls, I’m going to scream. I’m not even sure Danni will be young enough to carry another pregnancy if that happens. But hey, at least this picture of them cuddling under the stars is cute. I like to think they’re planning their babies’ names when they do this, since everyone in the family is named after either a star or a constellation.

Just like big sis Gomeisa, Hamal rolled Romance on her birthday and summoned a Tricou kid, this time Loren’s brother Tiave, from the wishing well for her first kiss. The girls in this family really seem to enjoy flirting with matriarchy.

Right after Hamal hit him and quit him, Zaniah popped out to scare her. I don’t think the old hypocrite approves of his great-granddaughters rolling Romance or dating Tricous.

With Gomeisa and Hamal’s first kisses obtained and generation two finally laid to rest, Diadem was able to nab her last scholarship and get shipped off to college with her nieces. I’m sure they’ll have a blast there while I head back to the home lot and pray to Wright for an heir who STILL hasn’t been born and (hopefully) play him all the way to teendom and young adulthood. Sigh.

Legacy Scoring:

Legacy: 3 Money: 2 Family friends: 38x.25 = 9.25 Impossible wants: 9 (Alph 20L, Sharon 30F, Zaniah 7Sk, Angeline 7Sk, Fornax 7Sk,  Cassiopeia 200S, Electra 50FD, Diadem 7Sk) Platinum graves: 4 (Family, Popularity, Fortune) Ghosts: 1 (Old Age) Business: 4 Seasons: 2 Free Time: 4.5 (Games: Zaniah, Betelgeuse, Alpheratz, Electra, Fornax, Cassiopeia, Angeline) Collections: 1 (25 Elixirs) Master: 2 (Social Bunnies Need Love Too, Child Prodigy - Fornax, ) Handicaps: 0 Overflow: Penalties: -1 (bills) Total: 38.85

[writingfuzzy]

Ghost writer’s bet chap 3

Chapter 3

 The school day is finally over and all the students are making their way home after yet another day of education, all happy for it to be over until the next day. Ghost Writer personally had no feelings regarding it, he liked education but he himself is since long ago done with school. So he had spent all class hours to read or writer as he waited for the boy to come back out into the hallway.

Speaking of the boy.

Looking down from his place in the air the author catches sight of his target, coming out the doors to the school yard. A dark skinned jock laughs as he passes the ghost child and don’t even notice how he pushes the short boy into the door frame. Writer tries to think nothing of it, he doesn’t think anything of it aside from the simple notion of how these kind of things keeps reoccurring for the halfa.

Aside from the times that the child left his lessons for ghosts, which was a multitude of times, there had also been a theme for the halfa to be disturbed and mocked multiple times by his peers, for the whole of the day that Writer had stalked him he had so far counted up to 12 different occurrences of bullying on the halfa, and that was only for today. It had been a variation from the brutal kind he first witnessed at the first break, and down to the kind of name calling. And more often than not had the ghost seen how an adult was nearby but did nothing to stop the situation or reprimand the offending party. Still he saw no reason for why he should particularly care, it isn’t like the child is incapable to stop it he had just for some reason decided not to.

Ghost Writer huffs, if anything so is Danny encouraging this bad behavior of his peers, by repeatedly letting himself be a target and a victim that never does anything to stop it, it makes it so that those that are causing harm is learning that they can get away with it.

Looking down again from his position near the top of the entrance doors he sees when the halfa’s friends comes out from the building and joins their friend on their walk home. At least that is where the ghost is assuming they headed.

Drifting down to A, make certain that he don’t trigger that ghost sense by slipping in and out of its area, and B, to be close enough to hear what they might say between each other. Normally Writer wouldn’t care to do something so stupid like eavesdrop but he still have yet to find anything discriminatory against the boy.

Well he do believe he has some few things already, or one, the boy do not care for his education. That for Writer alone is proof that the boy is both ignorant and illiterate. That and the amounts of fights he throws himself into indicate that he holds violent more to heart than anything else. When all this sounds logical for the librarian he is also sadly aware that it is simply speculation from his side and that there is no way that the stubborn woman from before would agree to it being enough. Especially not with how she had stressed the “sharable” bit of the deal.

Actually, he probably could steal a copy of the ghost child’s grades to use as evidence. Yet it wouldn’t be of any use when the subject for the deal is to prove whose fault the Christmas incident was. And so long as he couldn’t make any direct links between the child’s none existence grades to that event there would be no point to even look into it.

For what felt like the thousands time, Ghost Writer sigh. If he at the very least could interact with the brat this would be a lot easier.

He gives his thoughts a pause at that. He couldn’t interact with the child? Where in the rules does that come up exactly, the only two rules that he can recall that apply is the one about confronting the child on the subject for the bet and the other is about interfering in ongoing events of his life. But neither of those rules explicitly forbids all interactions. Ghost Writer knows he will have to look over what he wrote down about the rules but he is certain that he technically can interact just fine with the target.

And that opens up for the possibility of tripping him up. Just because he himself isn’t allowed to bring up that subject that doesn’t mean he can’t course the kid into doing it instead. And the event thing says nothing about not causing other evenest for the child, only not to stop ongoing ones.

Silently the ghost smirked as he continued to follow the group of three. It wasn’t until the black clad girl asked about the halfa’s day that he zoned back from his reverie.

“You were missing for a while in second class.”

“Yeah man, normally it’s just a few minutes but this was more to 20 minutes. What happen? Did Skulker get an upgrade again or something.”

This is uninteresting, it is about that blond jocks assault. And just as he thought that is what the halfa answered. “The janitor was there in the hallway so I couldn’t get out until after he had left.”

“Rough.” That was Tucker’s only comment as he went back to his PDA, Sam on the other hand went a little longer.

“This is what I keep talking about, the teachers are so ignorant of the football teams behavior it’s ridiculous.” She made a frustrated sound as she fling her arms around. “Just shows you how corrupt our day’s society is.”

Danny smiled at her rant but said nothing, Tucker on the other hand huffed. “Yeah, and it’s not like they are any good either. I mean did any of you guys see their last match against Elmorttown? It was brutal.”

From there the discussion went on shifting around about different faults in the social structure and general complains. It made Ghost Writer frown. He had noticed it early in the conversation between the children but had thought they would address it later on, not once had either of the other two asked the halfa of how he felt and if he was hurt.

Shut in he may be but he is after all an author and the friend code usually involves such things as care and concern.

“Right, hey Danny,” Sam directed towards the halfa that snapped to attention with a confirming hum, “what happen to Dash afterward. Did he leave you along after that?”

Ah, even if a bit late it seems that the expected concern questions would arrive now. Danny hummed for a bit before answering, “He threw some paper balls at me during history and stole my food at lunch but otherwise nothing more happen, I didn’t try to get back at him.”

Sam about to say something got intercepted by Tucker. “Dude, he deserves a a knock down from that pedestal of his. Maybe you can do that locker prank again.”

Danny open his mouth to answer but Sam beat him to it. “No way Tucker. Dash doesn’t even look for anyone else anymore then Danny for the culprit. And you can’t have Danny keep doing things like that with his powers. Someone will catch him.”

“But then it doesn’t matter, if he will blame Danny anyway why not be the one that actually have done something. And no way will he get caught, it’s been a little more than a year and no one have gotten a clue about it. So relax, it’s totally safe.”

Raising his hand Danny again tried to talk only to be spoken over by Sam, again. “Not only would that be morally questionable but it would be abuse of his power.”

“Oh come on Sam.”

“Lay off Tucker.”

From there it continued back and ford with short or long responses and insults. Both discussing the right use for the halfa’s abilities. For some reason felt Ghost Writer disappointed in them, disappointed and annoyed. That were their version of worry and care? Not only had the directed questions for what had happened to him been made up by one single question, but they had left the subject and gone off on a tangent.

And then it is the matter of how the ghost child didn’t even mention the times he had gone off to fight ghosts, be it under break time or in the middle of a lesson.

“And where were you at the breaks Danny? We only saw you a short moment at lunch today and even then you disappeared shortly after.”

Maybe Ghost writer spoke to soon after all.

Rubbing his neck the halfa answered, “When I wasn’t running from Dash or his buddies it was pretty mush ghost fight upon ghost fight, sorry guys that I didn’t get to spend time with you.”

“Who were it and why didn’t you ask us for help?”

“Yeah we could have helped man.”

“Because you would have gotten late to the classes and we don’t need all of us getting detention.” He stops as he facepalm. “Detention, I forgot. I have detention. Sorry guys you go home, see you for patrol.”

“Sure Danny. See ya.”

Sam scowled. “You really have to try harder to not get these slips. Your grades can’t take well to this.”

“Tell me about it. Well bye.” And Danny sprints back into school. Writer looks over his shoulder at the two other children as they left and he followed the halfa back indoors. Frowning, so his target cared about others education at least but his friends sound to be about the same opinion on their own studies as he is on his own. Treating it as something none important.

Huffing silently and cursing i his mind for not being able to make sounds and having to be overly careful he and the halfa shortly arrived at their destination, the detention. Joy.

And the one holding the detention was the English and lit teacher. That at the very least is good. Out of all the teachers on the school that Ghost writer got to hear in the background he found this one the most responsible, he for one reprimanded the halfa when said being decided to leave the lesson or come late due to ghost fighting. It also helped that he is teaching inside subjects of interest for the ghost librarian. Even if he hadn’t listened in completely to the lesson to hear how good this teacher’s lesson really was.

No matter, he was going to be stuck here for a while and more certainly then not will have to sit outside this lesson again at some point.

As the halfa walked and sat down at a desk in the back Ghost writer chose to hover near the ceiling on the other side of the room in the back. Aside from the teacher there were no others here so he saw little point in sitting outside for this hour.

It annoyed him with how obvious it was that Danny is no stranger to detention, not with how he clearly knew what to do under it as he immediately took out different study books and what he would guess to be homework, which the child started to work with.

At least he didn’t waste his detention time as he did his class hours.

Ghost writer had finished reading his book in the last class so he took out his own note book and in cover of Danny’s own scratching of pen, started to write. And so the hour went, Danny flipping pages in one book or other as he wrote down notes or filled in assignments, Writer wrote down two new scenes to a novel idea he had ongoing and the teacher in the front read in a book about slang among youngsters.

As the clock read out 15.30 Lancer look up from his desk and look over to the only student in the room. “Detention is over mister Fenton. I would say I hope not to see you here again, but with your track record that don’t seem probable. See you later Mr. Fenton.”

Saying nothing Danny left the room with his head down. Unaware of the ghost following after him, who is silently brooding yet again regarding the child and his attitude for school, seeing how he had not even tried to deny that he would be back in detention.

They had barely gotten two steps out from the building when Danny’s mobile went off. Flipping it open and answering he look tired but sounds almost peppy.

“Hello.”

Writer can’t hear the conversation on the other side of the phone.

“I would want to, really, but remember how my parents grounded me last week? That isn’t over just yet. You could try meeting up at my place.”

“…”

“Oh, okay then, that’s fine. See you two at patrol instead?”

“…”

What happens at Sam’s?”

“…”

“I thought she hated those kind of things.”

There were a bit of louder sounds from the other side of the phone before another pause until Danny spoke again.

“Ah. Try to make yourself unnoticed for a while before slinking off to a corner, it should work for the most part. Or you could try repeating the fact it is only for a evening and try convincing the adults to let you go early. After all you parent do care for your grades Sam.”

There were some more sounds before Danny laughed a little. “Well I’m almost home, and seeing how I got detention again mom and dad may be taking my phone. I will see Tucker tonight and you tomorrow then Sam.” “Yeah, bye.”

He flipped it back closed before stepping up to his door and into his home. Ghost writer hesitated for a moment, it had been no trouble being here earlier in the day but that was only a short passing through as he searched for the halfa. Taking a breath he went in, he was going to be forced to spend time in there either way at some point so best to get used to it as soon as possible.

Inside he met the scene of one halfa getting shewed out by two angry parents. One of which is holding a report card in their hand. It would seem Ghost writer wouldn’t need to search for how badly Danny really were doing in school, as said child’s parents read up aloud just how bad it indeed is.