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ice-cap-k · 8 months

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Heads Will Roll Ch2

Cross-posted to AO3 here: Heads Will Roll Ch 2

You can read CH 1 here

You can read CH 3 here

You can read CH 4 here

_______________________________________________

Monsters are dangerous.

Martyn knew this. Skizz, Etho, and BigB knew this. Everyone in Dogwarts knew this. Monsters preyed on people. They were the stuff born of nightmares and darkness and spread trouble in their wake. Even monsters considered weak and relatively less threatening, like zombies, could be deadly if they caught an individual traveler unawares or had the advantage of numbers on their side.

Martyn thought he knew monsters well. He had seen almost as many men lost to monster attacks during the battle with the desert dwellers as had been killed by the enemy themselves. They were the kind of thing that swooped in with no regard for personal safety in the hopes of leaving you nothing more than a crater in the ground. They were the kind of thing to rise out of the dust with weapons drawn to strike you from a distance. They were the kind of thing that attacked your best friend in the woods and then left him for dead.

The Kingdom of Dogwarts had always taken a hard stance against monsters, even before Ren had assumed the throne. They were to be handled with extreme prejudice. Exterminated, even. Up until now, he never really thought much about that.

With all of this in mind, Martyn was having a hard time believing what he had just seen.

He sat in a private lounge that the King, the Counsel men, and he often visited at the back of the castle to relax. Skizz, BigB, and Etho were all there as well. All of them looked equally bothered by what had just happened and expressed it in their own ways.

Skizz relentlessly tidied up the fourth and fifth bookshelves on the wall. Again. He was avoiding his thoughts by losing himself in the act of cleaning. On the other end of the room, BigB was curled up in an overstuffed chair with a steaming drink of some kind. His fingers tapped against the glass as he stared at the contents of his mug with such intensity, that Martyn wouldn't have been surprised if his eyes could bore holes into its bottom. And then there was Etho pacing back and forth in a line from one corner of the room to another. At this rate, he was going to wear through the carpet. Not that Martyn was faring any better. He was currently fiddling with his eyeglass. The telescoping tool clicked in and out in his hands. In and out. In and out. In and out. The overworked bearings would probably wear out at this rate. The telltale click of the moving parts was already starting to sound dull. Nobody seemed to mind the incessant noise, though. Or noticed for that matter.

He hadn’t really kept track of how much time had passed like that. The four of them were too quiet. At some point though, Martyn fumbled halfway through opening his telescope for the umpteenth time. The copper casing slipped from between his fingers, sending the tool clattering to the floor. The sound was like a shockwave through the room. The others froze as it rolled into the leg of Martyn’s chair. Three sets of wide eyes went straight to the little telescope on the floor.

“Sorry,” Martyn mumbled as he reached down to retrieve the eyepiece. “Just a little distracted, you know?”

“Tell me about it,” Skizz sighs. He finally puts down the books in his hand and pulls away from the shelf. “This whole thing feels like one big nightmare. Like, it can’t actually be real, can it?”

“How else do you explain what we saw,” BigB chimes in. He sinks deeper into the armchair. “That Scar guy even had scratches on his wrists from when they fought. Human nails don’t do that.”

Skizz narrows his eyes at that. “Hey, what happened with Scar anyway? I, uh, wasn’t really paying attention after the guards took…” He trailed off, not wanting to say the King’s name out loud. Martyn was glad that he didn’t. It might feel like it actually happened if they addressed it directly, and none of them were ready for that yet.

“The guards took him to the east wing to get looked at by a physician,” Martyn answered. “They’ll probably set him up with a room to stay the night. The advisors are looking to him for, I don’t know. Advice or something. Since he’s the primary witness, they’re putting him up on a pedestal while this whole thing gets sorted.”

“Sorted. You mean when they execute him,” Etho scowled.

Martyn's falling eyeglass may have shocked the group back into reality, but Etho’s words practically bowled them over. Martyn found himself gripping the telescope so tight his knuckles went white. BigB and Skizz visibly flinched, almost dropping their tea cup and bumping into the bookshelf respectively. “Yeah. That.” Martyn’s voice cracked.

There was a long moment of silence. “Does that mean,” BigB started with a wavering voice. “That Martyn will be King next?”

“No,” Martyn snapped before he even had time to think about the statement. “Don’t. Don’t talk like that.”

“But you’re the King’s hand,” BigB said. He sounded so small. The teacup in his fingers was shaking as he held it. “There is no named heir. Wouldn’t the title go to you next?”

“That’s not how that works,” Skizz butt in. “If there’s no heir, then the decision for next in line will be decided by the council of advisors. The Hand and the Counsel have nothing to do with it. We’re just personal advisors. Martyn’s the only one here with an actual political position, and that’s not going to mean much in the face of the group in charge of the decision.”

“Oh…”

It got quiet again as all four of them mulled that thought over.

Gods above, what would Martyn do when they called him in for that meeting? Would he even be capable of discussing such a thing? It seemed silly to think that he would be capable of anything once his liege was gone. That the world would still keep spinning as it always had and life would simply move on. Didn’t seem fair now, did it?

“I think…I think I should go talk to him…”

All three sets of eyes shot to Martyn in disbelief. “Y-You want to do what,” BigB stammered.

Oh. Had Martyn actually said that out loud? Whoops.

“I don’t know,” he sputtered, not sure whether to backtrack or stick to his guns. “I just… I mean… It’s Ren guys. Ren!” There was a lot going unsaid but understood by everyone in the room with that statement. ‘Ren, whom we practically grew up with. Ren who broke down crying after killing a man who had tried to kill him first during the war. Ren who hates monsters.’ None of that needed to be said for them to understand. “I feel like I need some sort of explanation.”

Skizz looks down at his own shoes, not wanting to look Martyn in the eye. He scowls. “I mean, that sure sounds nice, but there’s no way.”

“And why not?”

“Because he’s in the dungeon, dude. There’s no way they’ll let you go down there, even if you are the Hand. Especially now that you’re technically the Hand to someone who’s actually a monster of all things. Think about it, Martyn. They might start suspecting you of knowing about this and colluding with him. They could accuse you of treason.”

“Of course I didn’t know,” Martyn hissed. “That’s why I want to understand.”

“But that’s not how people are going to see it,” Skizz shoots back. “You know that, Martyn.”

Thoughts whirled through Martyn’s brain at high speed. Again, Skizz was making good sense. But he wasn’t about to let this go. Backtracking wasn’t an option anymore. He wanted to dig into this idea now. “Well, what if I snuck into the dungeon? Nobody sees me go in or come out. I could pull that off, I think.”

“But what if you get hurt down there?” BigB sounds nervous. His fingers are winding around themselves. “Nobody will know to come help you.”

“How on Earth would I get hurt?”

“Ren,” Etho said plainly. “Ren could hurt you.”

The others winced at Etho’s bluntness. Honestly, Martyn even got a little mad about it. “I already said, this is Ren we’re talking about. You know Ren wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

Etho’s one good eye narrowed at Martyn. “People and monsters alike are capable of anything when cornered. Ren’s cornered right now.”

He reached up and pulled down the mask covering the lower half of his face. BigB and Skizz look away respectfully. Skizz’s eyes go to his own scars lacing across his arms. The angry little ember in Martyn’s chest fizzled out. Etho made it clear he wants him to see his full face, now on display. He doesn’t dare turn away.

Ren hadn’t been the only one who had been lucky enough to survive an attack.

“I’m not going to stop you if you do this,” Etho said, pulling the mask back up over his nose. ‘But after what I saw in that throne room earlier, I wouldn’t risk it myself. Don’t let your guard down if you go.” With that, he pivoted on his heel and made for the door.

BigB sat up straighter in his chair. “Etho? Etho, don’t go… Please-”

Martyn wanted to say something as well. But he couldn’t think of anything good enough. Before he could come up with something, Skizz raised his hand sharply, cutting BigB off. He shot Skizzleman a concerned look, but the other man only shook his head.

SLAM!

The books rattled on their shelves. Some of the ones on the end tipped over where there was open space between them and the enclosed end of the shelf they sat on. They clattered to the floor in a mess of pages.

“Let him go,” Skizz said gently. “Give him a minute on his own. I think he might be taking this harder than we thought. ”

“Yeah...” Martyn swallowed the lump in his throat. None of them were handling the situation particularly well, were they?

“Well…” BigB speaks up. His voice is so small when he turns back to Martyn. “I think it’s a good idea. I want to know why he didn’t tell us.”

Despite what had just happened with Etho, Martyn couldn’t help the small smile that pulled at the corners of his lips when he heard BigB’s words. ‘Why didn't he tell us…?’ Not ‘Why didn’t he hurt us’ or ‘How long has he kept up the charade’ or ‘What had he been planning to do?’ All of those were still valid questions. Ones that probably needed answering as well. Ones that were probably playing at the forefront of Etho’s mind before he had stormed out. But those weren’t what BigB was focused on. Why didn’t he tell us? Well how about ‘why didn’t he trust us? Why didn’t he trust me?’ Those were the most pressing questions on Martyn’s mind.

“I’m going to do it,” Martyn says with a nod. “Later tonight after the sun has set and things start to settle down. I’ll talk to Ren and see what he has to say.”

BigB sighed in relief.

Skizz nods. “There will be fewer guards then too. How do you plan on getting through the dungeon door without being seen, though?”

Martyn’s smile widened to a mischievous grin. “Oh, I wouldn’t worry about that. I’m a master of all things sneaky. ”

_______________________________________

The first thing Ren was aware of when he finally came to was that everything hurt. Especially his head. His guards were trained to measure their hits. To only lash out when necessary and make every hit count. The one that had knocked him out had clearly taken that training to heart. Just the act of turning his head sent a wave of nausea rushing through him. It turned his stomach, not that there was anything to throw up. When was the last time he had eaten anyway?

That raised another question. How long had he been unconscious?

It took a massive amount of effort, but he managed to open his eyes. The movement was slight enough that it didn’t bring on a rush of pain or queasiness. Still, his eyes didn’t seem to want to focus. He could make out dark swathes of dull colors, and something bright and orange glowing to his left. There was no definition to the color, though. Only blurry shapes that bled together.

He blinked a few times, trying to get his eyes to focus. It made the back of his skull ache, but eventually, the blurry edges became sharper. Everything was finally becoming clearer, only for him to realize that there wasn’t much here for him to see.

This was the dungeon. Or at least one of the cells. The ones intended for holding prisoners temporarily. It had been dug into the castle’s basement when it was originally built. He hadn’t bothered updating them when he inherited the castle. They had seen so little use during his reign. How ironic that he was now its sole occupant?

Aged stone brick walls boxed him in on four sides. The old masonry was cracked and growing mold and mildew along its mortar borders. No windows. Just blank walls. That meant they would have taken him to one of the lower layers. The ones below ground where there was no sun to shine in. The ones reserved for the most dangerous inmates.

The fifth side had black iron bars stretching from ceiling to floor. A perfect barrier for fae, and anyone else for that matter. It gave any guard walking through the hall outside the cell a clear view of the occupant and the entire room they resided within. He couldn’t see it without moving his head, but Ren knew that there was a door set into the bars. The steel framework boxed it in and kept it standing.

Nor could Ren see the floor he was lying on without rolling over. He didn’t have to see it to know that it was laid with worn cobblestone left dusty over years of disuse. When he twitched his fingertips, he could feel the trails they left in a layer of fine grey dirt.

The orange flicker he had seen turned out to be a torch. Someone had been kind enough to leave a long burning tallow torch in one of the burners set along the sides of the hallway. It was his only source of light down here.

He tried to move his arms first. He wanted to rub at the lump that he must have had on the back of his head, but when he tried shifting his right hand something tugged on the left. He heard clattering every time he tried to move his arm. When he felt along his hands and wrists, he traced along the edges of metal cuffs. Simple iron bands and links. A short chain connected his right wrist to his left. They had put him in shackles.

He let his hands drop back down against his stomach. “Fantastic.”

If they had chained his wrists, what about his legs? Tentatively, he rolled his feet back and forth. Sure enough, there was a heaviness to his ankles. The telltale clink of metal chimed with every move.

He was going to have to sit up. He didn’t want to. His head already hurt enough. The knuckles on one hand were sore from when he had punched that fairy… That fairy!

Ren shot upright in an instant and regretted it a second later. Black spots danced across his vision. It felt like his head was spinning. But that didn’t matter right now. How he was feeling doesn’t matter. What mattered was that there was a fairy up there. One that somehow knew how to manipulate people’s perceptions. His friends were in danger. His kingdom and its people were in danger.

Were they still under that Scar fellow’s spell? Ren didn’t know enough about fae to understand what it had done to them. He wasn’t even sure what kind of fairy it was. Just that it meant trouble. Monsters only ever made things more complicated. He should know.

When he closed his eyes he could still see that vacant look in his friend’s eyes. They had just… stopped what they were doing…

There was no way he was just going to sit here moping while that thing continued to terrorize them.

It took some time for his vision to fully return back to normal. When it did, he scanned the room he was stuck in.

There really wasn’t much here to work with. The chains on his feet ran longer than the ones on his wrists. The ends were fastened to a loop of metal bolted into the wall near the entrance. The tether gave him enough leeway to reach the far wall where a simple cot was lying on the floor if he so desired. But alas, he did not desire.

And that was about all there was to see.

It wasn’t much, but he could work with that. Hopefully. There had to be some sort of plan that he could come up with to get out of here and warn the others. Mortar was supposed to be weaker than stone, right? If he worked at it hard enough, he could wear a bit of it away until a stone came loose. That would take some time, though, and he didn’t have anything to dig with. They hadn’t even bothered to leave him a last meal and a spoon. What about the bars? If he could slip through them somehow, then he could find a way to leverage the chains on his ankles to break a link. His hands would still be in a bind, but he could figure that part out as he ran. Unfortunately, that didn’t look like it would be much of an option either. The bars had been criss-crossed and embedded in concrete, prepared for potential prisoners far smaller than him. There was the cot, though. If he could find a loose thread he could pull out some of the stuffing and hide inside. But where would he put the material once he hollowed it out? There was nowhere to hide anything here.

The torch burned on as Ren sat and pondered his options for a while. The same handful of schemes replayed over and over in his head, each time tweaking some sort of detail and hoping that it would make for a sensible escape plan. What felt like it could have been an hour dragged on until eventually he huffed in frustration and shook his head. The motion still hurt, but at least it didn’t make him feel like he was going to be sick anymore.

None of these plans would work. Maybe eventually, if he had plenty of time to work at it slowly, but he had no clue what time it was. It could be the middle of the night for all he knew. No matter what, they would be coming back for him tomorrow. The law was very clear on the procedure for dealing with monsters.

Oh yeah… That.

He blinked, every muscle tensing as he slowly raised both hands to where he could reach his face. He ran his fingers over his neck and jawline, half expecting to feel the soft brush of fur. To his relief, whatever magic had made it appear before was no longer in play. There were no claws at the ends of his fingertips to scratch at the exposed skin. “I’m normal again,” he said softly and the words were actual words. Not growls.

Did that really matter anymore?

They thought he was a monster.

His eyes took in the whole room, looking at the grim stone in a new light as the full realization of his predicament finally sunk in.

They thought he was a monster. That hadn’t been something that Scar fellow had faked. Regardless of whatever power the fae could exert, the fear and hate in their eyes when they had looked down on Ren had been genuine. The sense of royal duty melted away as he couldn’t focus on anything other than that fact. Forget his subjects for the moment. Right now, he was just another man trembling in fear.

His own friends were afraid of him. They hated him. Even Martyn. Martyn who had vowed to serve as his right hand until the day either of them died. Martyn who had saved his life on more than one occasion. Martyn, who had supported Ren long before he took the throne.

And he honestly couldn’t blame them. He would have hated him too if he had been in their place. He was going to be sentenced to death. That was going to happen. It was already happening, and the people he cherished would watch with that same fear and hatred in their eyes. The same fear and hatred that once haunted his nightmares.

In a moment of weak-willed self-indulgence, tears started streaming down Ren’s cheeks. And then his breathing hitched into sobs. He let himself cry. And he cried for a long time until there weren’t any tears left and all that came were dry sobs. When he eventually lifted his head from his folded arms, he could see that the torch was beginning to burn itself out. The light it gave off had started to grow dim.

Slam!

Ren’s heart nearly skipped a beat as he heard footsteps pounding against the stone above him. He sniffed, straightening up as if that would help him hear whomever it was more easily.

Slam!

Another loud noise followed close behind. Even more footsteps echoed down the halls, this time accompanied by the clatter of armor. Guards.

Ren shifted back in his cell. Chains rattled as his feet scrambled to push him back into a corner. His legs protested against the movement. The sudden motion made his head pound and his throat was now sore from crying, but he gritted his teeth and powered through the pain. There was nowhere to hide, but he wanted to. He wanted to put as much distance between himself and the door to his cell as he could. He wasn’t sure how much of a fight he’d be able to put up with his wrists shackled together, but he wasn’t prepared to just go along willingly to the fate they had prepared for him.

When his back pressed against the wall and he couldn’t move another inch further, no matter how much he wanted to, Ren noticed that muffled words were echoing down the hall.

“Which way did they go?”

“I lost sight of them after they went through the door.”

“Fan out. Check all the cells. We have to find them.

“Weapons at the ready! We don’t know who they are or what they’re capable of.”

“Cut them down if you have to. Drag them back for interrogation if you can.”

Odd. That sounded like they were talking about an intruder. Or escapee. But who could they possibly be after?

From the cell, Ren could hear the guard's footsteps fan out across the floor above. One or two sounded like they were going in the same direction as that very first set of footsteps. It didn’t take long for the noises to fade away. The only sound left was the crackle of the torch. He waited. He listened so hard that his ears hurt. What was happening up there?

A moment passed before echoing voices reached his ears.

"Why you-"

"Gonna have to be faster than that, mate. Whoa ho ho!"

That voice… "Martyn?" Ren breathed, not quite sure if he believed what he was hearing.

"Stop that. Hey!"

Crash!

Ren nearly jumped out of his skin as something down the hall rattled and clattered. The torch flickered with a passing breeze.

"Well, that works in my favor," Martyn’s voice drifted closer. Now Ren could hear footsteps coming closer and closer. A shadow passed through the bars of his cell as a cloaked figure stepped into view. Their hooded head turned, and Ren recognized those blue eyes framed by light blond hair.

Ren tensed. He found himself gripping at the chains hanging from his wrists. The cold metal bit into his palms. His mouth went dry as he opened his mouth to speak. "Martyn. It is you…"

"Ren!" Martyn threw the hood off his head. A bright smile stretched across his face that made Ren's stomach twist. "Oh my gosh, Ren! I finally found you."

"Me Hand-" The smile dropped off Martyn's face the moment he used the title. Ren found himself wincing. Martyn didn’t seem comfortable with that familiar greeting anymore. So Ren tried again. "Martyn, what are you doing here?"

"I was looking for you…" He trailed off, looking over the King cowering in the corner of his cell. Ren felt so small under his friend's gaze. What a sight he must be, with the blood drying in his messed up hair and dirt smeared on his everyday clothes. The intimidating king from this morning was gone. His gaze lingers somewhere above Ren’s eyes. "They took your crown?"

"Oh!" Ren reached up with both hands to the top of his head. His fingers met strands of tangled hair, but no gold and silver crown. Martyn watched the swing of the chains hanging from his wrists with widening eyes. Ren hadn't even noticed the symbol of his status was gone. Made sense, he supposed, since his status as King was basically gone now to. "I suppose so. Not like I really needed it anymore."

"Ren…"

"Well, you said you were looking for me," Ren said, his throat tightening around the words. He didn't like the sad look in Martyn’s eyes right now. "I can probably guess why."

“I just don’t understand, Ren. What we saw up there-”

“I’m sorry.” Ren screwed his eyes shut. It hurt to see Martyn look at him like that.

“It was real, Ren.”

“It was.”

“How could that be?”

How could they see it? Or how had he become what he was? Neither question had a pleasant answer. Gnashing teeth and wicked claws tore their way to the forefront of his mind. The scars on his side started to itch.

“Do you remember that evening when you found me by the river? After the attack…?”

Martyn nodded. A small, sheepish smile appeared on his face. “How could I forget? It was the one time I had been anything but useful to you.”

“That’s not true,” Ren said immediately. Even though the pain hazed fog of memory, he had known Martyn had found him. Could remember the press of his friend’s hands against his ribs when he was struggling to breathe.

“I still have nightmares about it,” Martyn added a little more quietly.

“Me too. For a couple of different reasons. It, uh, it started after that. That was when things changed. That bite did something to me and I couldn’t undo it.”

The first time Ren had a panic attack after he recovered had been hell. Luckily enough, he had been on his own at the time. Too busy working himself up over another hunt gone wrong for the beast that had caught him unawares in the woods. Two hunters had been killed and several injured, and it was his fault they were going after the monster in the first place. He had been the one foolish enough to travel the path alone the day he was attacked.

One moment he was trying to keep his hyperventilating under control, the next he was scratching at the door to his bed chambers with claws half as long as his fingers.

When he came to, he half expected the whole episode to have been a horrible nightmare, until he saw the marks on the back of his door. And then it happened again one week later on the night of a full moon. And then again the month after, and so on, and so on. It took three months for the realization to set in that this was to be his new normal from then on out.

Martyn’s eyes were wide with horror. His fingers wrapped around the bars of the cell. He pressed against them as if he could push through to get to Ren on the other side. “Then?!” he hissed, voice sounding strained. A shadow of guilt crossed over his face, knuckles white as his grip tightened. “You aren’t human anymore because of then?!?”

“It’s not your fault Martyn.”

“Sure it is. If I had just been there-”

“Then the same thing would have happened to you as well. Or worse,” Ren said sternly. And Ren wouldn’t have been able to live with himself if something like that had happened. Before Martyn could protest again, Ren continued.

“I didn’t know what to do afterward. I thought about turning myself in, but I hadn’t hurt anyone. I felt in control on full moons when the fur and the claws came out. Not sure if it had something to do with me starting out human first, but… I just thought that if I could keep myself in check, maybe I could just keep going. See how long it lasted. There are a few enchantments I know. Wards that can keep that side of me from being detected. What you saw up there earlier, that’s what I look like on the night of a full moon.”

“This is insane.” One of Martyn’s hands went up to grip at the hair hanging along one side of his face. The fingers buried themselves in as he fretted. The hand still gripping the bars of Ren’s cell was shaking. Blue eyes looked wildly around, then snapped to Ren's face. “I can’t… This isn’t… You… Was it you?”

Ren blinked. “What do you mean?”

“The tower. And the cows. Damage done by a weapon and claws and teeth. Was it really you?”

“No,” Ren spat, voice growing bitter. “I didn’t do it. I honestly had no clue what did.” But now he had a good guess.

“Listen, Martyn,” Ren snapped, forcing a sharp edge into his tone. His friend jolted, giving him his full attention with wide eyes. “I’m sorry. Ok? I really am. I never meant for any of this to happen. The last thing I ever wanted was to freak you guys out. But you have to listen to me. The reason why all of you saw me like that was because that Scar guy saw through my wards. He knew what I was the moment he laid eyes on me. That whole trick with the crown shouldn’t have been possible.”

“I don’t understand…”

“Silver and gold don’t just turn me into a monster. If that was the case then any time I touched my crown you would have seen me with fur. Scar did that.”

“How could he do something like that?”

“Because Scar is a fairy.”

“What?!?”

“I swear it’s true! The rumors of fae that have been running through town. They have to be because of him. I saw his wings when he stripped my wards away. He’s a fairy and is using a glamor to look human. Fairy magic. That’s why he could tell right away what I was.”

The entire time he spoke, Ren had been inching further and further away from the wall. He had been drawing closer and closer to Martyn. His poor friend looked overwhelmed. Now Ren stood a foot away from the bars. He wanted to reach out and squeeze Martyn’s shoulders. To hug him through the bars, but he was sure that a hug from a monster was the last thing Martyn wanted right now.

“I think I get it now,” Martyn said. He froze, eyes widening, finally understanding. “No wonder I felt so weird in the throne room when he went for your crown. I… I think you’re right.”

Ren’s legs wobbled as a wave of relief washed over him. He hadn’t realized how heavy the worry that Martyn wouldn’t believe him had weighed down on his shoulders. It was both freeing and oddly exhausting.

Martyn looked worn out himself as he let his shaking hands drop to his sides. With a sigh, he instead put them into his pockets. The moment he did so, his eyebrows flew up and he nearly leaped back from the bars. “Gods above! What the hell?!?!”

Confused, Ren flinched away from Martyn and his shout of surprise. “What? What’s wrong?”

“You’re-” He pulled his hand from his pocket to point at Ren’s chest but cut himself off as soon as he did so. Eyebrows furrowed skeptically as he narrowed his eyes at Ren, who had no clue what was happening.

Why was Martyn acting like this? Ren turned to look behind him, thinking maybe Martyn had seen something strange. There was nothing there but stone walls. “What’s wrong, Martyn?”

“I don’t know.” Slowly, he put his hand back into his pocket. When he did so, his eyes flew wide once more. But he didn’t shout this time. “So that’s the real you...”

“What do you mean?” Ren brought up his hands, thinking maybe the fur and claws had somehow come back. Shackles clattered as he pulled them into the dying torchlight. No. His hands were still normal. There were no claws or fur, and when he ran his knuckle against his cheek he didn’t feel anything more than the scratch of his beard.

“Your fur. And the tail. And your ears. And your eyes,” Martyn said. Ren found his shoulders rising up against his ears uncomfortably. He shrunk away from the bars and Martyn, wishing there was someplace he could hide. It sounded like his friend could see everything Ren hated about himself. At first, he thought maybe that fairy was close by again, tearing down his wards and making things worse. But then Martyn pulled his hand out of his pocket once more. Wrapped between his thumb and forefinger was a small green stem with a few red smudges weighing down its leaves. It was a four-leafed clover. “Huh. I guess what they say about these things is true.”

“Oh.” No wonder Martyn could see him.

Wait a minute…

“Martyn! That’s it!”

“Huh? What’s it?”

“That clover. I don’t know how you got it, but that’s perfect. If you’re holding that next time you look at Scar, it will keep his magic at bay. You could see his wings. You could expose him before he hurts someone.”

“I can?” He looked at the little green plant in his hand, shocked. His hand moved out, holding it further away as Ren’s words sunk in. “I can! But wait a minute..,” Those blue eyes turned back on Ren. “What about you, M’Lord?”

A warm feeling filled Ren starting from his chest to his toes to hear Martyn call him that once more. He was the only one who ever did, and it made him happy to know that despite everything he had just admitted, Martyn still used the title without a second of hesitation.

“What matters is making sure that some fairy doesn’t hurt you guys up there. What happens to me doesn’t matter much as long as you’re alright.”

“But that’s not true. And it’s not right. You’re still human as far as I’m concerned. You were born human. Who cares if you look a little different when I hold this.” Martyn waved the clover in his hand. “You should have told us. You should have told me. We could have figured this out together.”

“And if we didn’t,” Ren said calmly. “And if you knew, then what would have happened when the rest of the world found out? They would have blamed you as well. You’d be in this cell beside me.”

Ren had wanted to tell his friends. He had wanted to tell them so badly. Ever since the night after the panic attack when he saw those claw marks in the door. Heaven knows how many times he had almost broken down and told Martyn when he felt overwhelmed. But just like how Ren was glad Martyn hadn’t been there when he had been bitten, he also was glad that none of them had to worry about this for so long. He would never have put them in a position where they could be blamed for knowing what he was. As far as he was concerned, he was lucky enough that the charade had lasted this long. There was no way he was going to drag them down with him.

But Martyn was too stubborn to be content with that. "Baloney. If what you're saying is true, then it's Scar who should be in there. Not you." He pocketed the clover and gripped the bar with one hand. The other reached out and snatched at the chain hanging from Ren’s wrists. For a moment, Ren was afraid Martyn was going to pull him against the bars, but instead, Martyn's hand ran up the links until it wrapped around Ren's own hand. It was warm and the cracks in the skin scratched against his palm. Ren gripped it, afraid to let go. "I'm telling the others, and we're going to expose him. And then we're getting you out of here."

"You can't change what happened, Martyn." He has to be strong. Be the King he no longer was. Martyn was offering him false hope to cling onto. He wasn’t sure he should take it, even if he wanted to.

"No." Martyn’s face brightened with a grin. "But I'm gonna change the future. Just watch me."

The warm hand disappears from Ren’s own. His fingers stay outstretched, not moving, still reaching after Martyn’s hand as it goes back to the other side of the bars. Despite his better judgment, Ren’s heart swells with hope.

"Thank you, Me Hand."

Martyn nods. "Of course, M'Lord."

He looks away, casting a glance back the way he came. "Hopefully that guard I knocked out won't wake up soon. I'm gonna go back and tell the guys everything you told me. Then we'll find Scar. Hang tight until then, okay?"

"I can do that," Ren said, stepping back from the bars. "And you be careful. That clover should make you immune to magic as long as you're holding it but even without their magic fae can do some pretty wicked stuff."

"Good to know." Martyn shoots one last look at Ren. It's torn, and reluctant. He clearly doesn't want to go, or at least doesn't want to leave Ren here, but then he pulls the hood of his cloak up. The fabric covers his head and hides his blue eyes out of sight.

"See you soon."

With that, he takes off back down the hall. Ren watches his back as long as he can from his cell. And when the wall blocks his sight he strains to hear Martyn’s footsteps until they fade away.

The torchlight finally dies out once they do. Ren is left sitting in the silence and the dark with a smile on his face.

_________________________________________

“And you’re sure this will work?”

Martyn shrugged his shoulders. “Of course not. But it sure beats moping around in the lounge, biding our time ‘til the sun comes up. Now are you coming with us or not?”

BigB raised his hands, fingers spread open and palms facing out defensively. “I’m with you. I’m with you,” he said hurriedly. “Just, you know, wanted to be clear.”

Skizz shifted against the wall he was leaning on. The back of his head bumped against the stone slightly as he screwed his eyes up with frustration. "If there’s even a chance that what you’re saying is true, then I’m all for this plan. I love it, even. But I still think we should tell Etho.”

"You saw how he reacted when I mentioned going to see Ren. Do you really think he would appreciate it if I knocked on his door in the middle of the night just to say, 'hey Etho. I know we just found out earlier that our friend is a dangerous beast with fur and claws, but I really think that we might actually have a fairy crisis on our hands and it's probably Scar?!"

"I know," Skizz huffed. "I know. But I still don't like it."

BigB reached over to pat Skizz on the arm. "Let’s try this first. If Martyn’s right then we'll go tell him. If it turns out to be a false alarm, then we shouldn't go making him worry about nothing."

Martyn’s fist tightened at his side. BigB wasn't calling Ren a liar, but the implication was there. Ren had never been much of a liar. He would embellish and maybe blow things out of proportion but never lie. Etho’s words nagged at the back of his head. 'People and monsters alike are capable of anything when cornered. Ren’s cornered right now.'

His hand goes to the clover in his pocket.

"Alright. I can do that," Skizz says, pushing away from the wall. There's a newfound confidence in his voice now. "I'm ready. Let’s do this.”

"I've got the clover," Martyn says with a nod. He can see the light pouring out through the gap between the door of the guest room Scar is staying in and the hall floor. "I'll pass it around once we're in there, so keep a hand behind your back at all times where he can't see. Remember, no matter what we see in there we can't react any differently from normal. Got it?"

"Got it."

They could do this. And when they exposed this Scar as the monster he really was, people would be willing to hear them out about Ren. Screw the law. BigB and Skizz already agreed they wanted to get their King out of there. They weren't happy about the secret Ren had kept, but they weren't interested in holding their friend's other side against him and neither was Martyn.

If the law said that someone like Ren was better off dead, then Martyn would find a way to get the law changed or tear down everything in his path trying.

#whumptober 2023 #prompt no. 21 #“see the chains around my feet”#life series #third life #creative writing #fantastic racism #imprisonment #rendog #martyn inthelittlewood #ethoslab #skizzleman #bigbst4tz2 #goodtimeswithscar #dogwarts #alternate universe - fantasy #creatures and monsters

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silvertsundere · 1 year

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Silver Talks AniManga (19/03/23)

biggest thing this week is me starting to catch up to UU only got through 30 chaps (in about 3 hours) cause I grossly underestimated just how much text it was gonna have it's good tho 👍

Undead Unluck Ch1 to 30

I greatly underestimated how long it'd take to catch up, I only started at midnight of this sunday, I thought because it was an action series it wouldn't take that long but I was clueless. But anyway, it's good, I can easily see how it managed to get through the cancelation danger gauntlet and how it's become fairly popular. My friend Mega had already told me beforehand that the first couple volumes are quite crude and lewd, and he was right, but I've seen a lot worse. Also the pacing is quite fast but it didn't bother me at all, tho I was reading everything back to back instead of weekly so maybe it would've been different. Anyway the last arc I read before stopping (Unrepair) was good and finished setting up the intro to the series I feel. Now we know what the main plot is, how this world works (mostly), we got to know a lot of the cast, the goals of our protagonists and antagonists and how they clash with each other. The best chap so far was 20, it was a colour page chap and it introduced one of the Big Plot Points for the series, also Juiz is just super cool too. I think I remember seeing that Andy and Fuuko join the baddies later? but I don't remember for sure so we'll see. Which also speaking of, Fuuko is very cute. I expect to have finished catching up before I do this again next week so look forward to the rest of that I guess.

Dandadan Ch97

been a while since the last full action chap and it slapped that last page was very pog. tho hype for when okarun finally rejoins the fray

Kaiju 8 Ch82

didn't expect such a nice chap for a side chara, that was good. hype for next chap with that ending tho

JOJOLands Ch2

wao the newest instalment of jojo is here but honestly it's too early on to really have any opinions on it, evil giorno is nice tho. at the end of chap 1 I said the person they were gonna rob was gonna be a returning chara from p4 or 6 but sure as hell didn't expect it to just straight up be rohan lol

Tokyo Underworld Ch34

damn yomi being brained for once impressive, tho just a few pages later he fucked up and almost got killed so it balances out

Jojo: Hol Horse/Josuke Spinoff Ch14

we got the spinoff's first stand rush pog. should only be 2 or 3 more chaps left til it's over but it's been a nice little diversion

Ichigoki's Under Control!! Ch15

what a terrible chapter, introduced a buncha characters and situations that never happened, since it's getting canceled and didn't get to actually do them. seems like it'll end next chap at least so that's good.

The Ichinose Family's Deadly Sins Ch17

damn I was gonna say "alright it's good to see ichinose has a clear goal now for the characters to follow" but then it hit me with that twist at the end again so uh nvm. not really a fan of the "it was all a dream" thing but we'll see how it goes

Ginka & Gluna Ch26

all that just for the baddie to run away? eh.... feels like quite the waste of such a cool concept for a power

Fabricant 100 Ch14

not as good as the last few chaps but p decent nonetheless

Jiangshi X Ch9

mostly action, showing off how powerful the dad is, still expect him to die soon tho

Tokyo Demon Bride Story Ch27

well things got solved quite nicely didn't they. I had anticipated this outcome originally, but with how much they were building up to a fight I had discarded it. anyway if ichigoki is really ending next chap then this should have 2 or 3 more chaps left.

Witch Watch Ch101

decent chap, was a throwback to this old spell

SPY x FAMILY Ch77

it was nice to get a lloid chap after so long, and with him actually doing his job nonetheless, I think that's a first

Blue Box Ch93

xmas? my sister in christ it's march

oh ok fair enough. anyway good chap like usual too, nice to see yumeka's character developing

Cipher Academy Ch16

a good chap but I'm also a hoe for murder mysteries, tho that twist at the end was very good 👀

Mashle Ch148

very funny chap, didn't expect something like this lol

Sakamoto Days Ch111

cool number pog. but anyway, wonder how much longer of this backstory is left, not that I'm not enjoying it tho, the gun throw was great

The Elusive Samurai Ch102

damn setting up some worrying implications for our protags in case they lose. also I figured they weren't going to fight ashikaga right away, and the ending proved that, shame they gotta fight that girl tho

Akane-banashi Ch54

a nice cooldown chapter after the intensity of the last few ones, but a good chapter still, setting up the next competition and goal for akane also I don't think I've ever said it in these but..she's so cute.. love all the little faces she makes

#silver talks animanga

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worstoftimesbestofcrimes · 11 months

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Among the Butterflies Ch 2: Suki and the No Good Very Bad Day

WIP snippet!

among the butterflies ch2 is really sukka heavy and currently clocking in at 12k words! i cannot help it, they are my my blorbos of all time. theyre not endgame in this fic, but they are the most besties to ever <3. anyway, heres a little 500 word snippet (of a 2.6k work scene oml) under the cut:

They waded out until the water hit their hips, then Suki laid on her back to float.

Sokka followed suit. “The water’s a lot warmer here than in my village. You can actually relax a bit.” He sighed.

“First time floater?” She held out her hand to him. He looked a little confused. She rolled her eyes. “Come on, hold my hand so we don’t drift away from each other.”

“Oh.”

He grasped on and Suki found herself surprised by the strength of his grip. Just like how she was surprised by his ability to keep up with her. She thought he was weak by how easy he was to take in a fight, but she was learning that wasn’t the case. Just uncoordinated, perhaps.

“How do warriors train in your village?” she asked.

“Oh, uh,” Sokka cleared his throat. “You know, spar each other, work out, do warm-ups and stuff.“

“Mh-hmm,” Suki hummed, not quite convinced by the tone of his voice.

Sokka sighed. “Truthfully? I’m not sure. All the real warriors left when I was still starting training. The second oldest boy in the village after me is 10. I’m supposed to be training the younger boys, but they’re all a mess. They try their best but… I dunno. I wish I was a better leader to them—I’m not sure what I’m doing half the time. I couldn’t even protect my village from one pirate ship…” His voice got small, quiet.

Suki mentally added a third thing to her list of things she’s learning about Sokka: he wears his heart on his sleeve. He tries to hide it, but he cares about people loudly—his village and the boys there, his family, even with Bikki, she could see it.

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kedreeva · 1 year

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WIP Wednesday Game

(original post)

Rules:

Post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can't share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post. If you tag me in your post, I will send you an ask request!

My file names:

FP Chapter 3

Ladyhawke AU (can't share)

Sentinel CH9

In Sorrow CH2

Singing CH10

My Snippet: (from FP Chapter 3)

“Don’t. It’s not Rhiley.”

Osker startled and froze, white-knuckling the knob. He looked over his shoulder to find Steve leaning haggardly against the doorframe of the dining room, watching him with a silvery glow in his pupils. “What?”

“Rhiley’s still asleep.” Steve raised his nose a little, giving a sniff in Osker’s direction, eyes on the door. “I can hear his heartbeat in Jasper's room.”

“But- I can-” Osker let the knob go to fully face Steve. “I can hear him calling me, outside. If it’s not him, what is it?”

“Crocotta.” He dragged himself away from the frame, gesturing for Osker to follow with a slight twitch his his head. He pulled a chair out from the dining room table and sank gingerly into it, but Osker stopped in the entryway. “It’s a canid super, kind of a- a hyena on steroids. They can mimic a human voice, so they follow travelers around to learn their names, and then call them away from the campfire.”

“Away from safety.” Osker blanched. He’d nearly fallen for it. “So they can kill you.”

“If you’re lucky,” Steve said with a slow smile. “They like to eat bits while you’re still alive and screaming, so they can learn to mimic those things, too. Not something you want to meet along at night.”

“No,” Osker agreed. “But we’re not traveling. Why’s it here?”

“Smell of our kitchen fire’s got it mixed up, I’d guess.”

Osker looked him over, still tense, but Steve wasn’t the threat here. Even at full strength, he’d never been the threat. He took a few steps into the room, just far enough to smooth his hands over the back of the nearest chair, opposite Steve. “You’ve, uh… you’ve been saving me an awful lot.”

“You’ve been getting into a lot of trouble,” Steve said, wincing when he leaned forward and straightening again, hand on his ribs. “Maybe stop doing that.”

#the final pack #WIP Wednesday game #my writing #osker owens #steve emerson

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qutiesquish · 2 years

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“Hexed Child”

Chapter 3 ch1|ch2

Prompt: a child ends up in the Entity’s realm, in the cursed hell where those who had already suffered enough in life had been chosen to suffer for eternity, a hell where they had to kill or survive, and make constant sacrifices. How well will they handle having a child to take care of in this constant game of death.

Authors words:

Gah sorry for the wait;-;

Pronouns: He/Him

Tags: @doggo-owns-this-account

Warning(s): de*th, manipulation, moral questioning, reader throws a fit, Tricksters screaming k!nK

“So.. I just stand here?… why?” {Reader} asked.

The Trickster had dragged {Reader} to the other side of the map, the side where the closest gens near him are already done, leaving Trickster with a higher chance of the other survivors not finding the little boy.

“Because… if you do I’ll uh…” Trickster tried to find something that would catch the kids interest.

Then a flip switched in Trickster’s head.

“I’ll get you a coat like mine! You said you liked mine right?” Trickster watched as the little boys eyes sparkled ever so slightly.

“Really?!”

Trickster nodded “of course, I always keep my promises.”

Trickster just hoped the Entity would let him get the kid a jacket like his, otherwise the kid would never trust him again.

Than again… why did he want the kids trust anyway?

As Trickster was about to go into a deep dive on what his morals were again, a gen popped.

Two left.

“Alright buddy, I gotta go okay? Uh…” Trickster pat his pockets down in search of something.

“Ah there it is!” Trickster pulled out a photo of himself.

“Here, you can draw on the back of this yeah?” He said as he pulled out a purple pen and handed it to the kid.

——

With the Survivors

——

“I can’t believe you left a kid to deal with him.”

“Shut it gramps.” Feng snapped as the three survivors finished a gen.

“Haven’t heard him scream, so he most likely hasn’t been hit yet, so chill out.”

“Do you really think that kid is looping him that good? He’s just a kid right.” David said, contemplating his life.

“Hell if I know dammit— AHH!!” Bill screamed as he was hit by a barrage of daggers.

Feng and David Ran off over behind some ruins, or “loops” as they called it.

Bill was close to being knocked down but he kept crouching behind this one pallet or the finished gen.

It was getting annoying.

Then finally, Trickster got a lucky shot in as Bill tried to crouch behind the pallet once again.

The idol hummed in content as he broke the pallet and picked Bill up.

Even with Bill’s wiggling, he still hummed in what Bill saw as delight. Oh god did he want to punch the younger purple haired man, if only he could.

“AHHHHHHH!!” Bill’s scream rang out through the realm.

Trickster hit Bill with his bat.

“Arghhh!… don’t you got the others to go get, or are you scared to lose- Arghh!!..” Bill groaned as Trickster hit him again.

“Asshole.”

Trickster laughed.

“Why should I leave when everyone I need to kill is on the other side of the wall to my left?” Trickster whispered towards Bill.

“RU- ARGHhhhh..” Bill groaned as Trickster hit him again and booked it to the other two survivors.

——

With Reader

——

{Reader} heard Bill scream.

He also heard a loud bang come from the sky above, a thing that looked like his friend, or what Feng called “The Entity” come down and and then retract itself back towards the sky.

{Reader} had convinced himself that he wasn’t hearing anything, at least anything that mattered anyway.

That’s what Trickster told him, anything that he heard in the trial from then on didn’t matter and to wait for Trickster to come back.

Plus, {Reader} was having too much fun drawing the Trickster with him and his pet cat. He missed pebble, hopefully he was okay.

——

With the Others

——

Feng had gave her life for David as he had escaped the eyes of the the Trickster.

He prayed that {Reader}, who he had learned the name of from Feng, was working on a gen somewhere.

As that thought passed he found a gen that was almost done. David figured that {Reader} was working on it and than the Trickster showed up.

Now assuming {Reader} was looping the Trickster around somewhere nearby as his heartbeat started to speed up.

*BOOM*

Then gen was finished.

One left.

As David tried to hide his scratch marks by walking away, he was suddenly hit by three daggers in the back.

David was now injured.

As David ran through the realm the Trickster laughed out, not too far behind him.

“I haven’t heard you scream enough David! Please! Entertain me for a little!!” Trickster laughed as he threw more daggers.

And just like that, David was down and being picked up by the Trickster.

Once David was hooked, he noticed something.

He saw {Reader}’s aura.

They were laying on the ground.

Had they been slugged and David just hadn’t realized it? Dammit!

The kid is probably suffering over there now.

David watched as the Trickster left towards the direction of the aura.

“You— heartless bitch!—“ David struggled to scream out.

Trickster had sloppily put David on the hook, resulting in one of David’s lungs being punctured.

Of course, the Entity made it so he didn’t die due the injury, but goddamn it hurt like a bitch.

Maybe he should’ve payed more attention and looked for {Reader}’s aura, maybe then he wouldn’t be bleeding out on the ground right now.

David closed his eyes and sighed as the Entity’s claws came down, accepting that everyone was dead and they had lost this trial, he would have to apologize to {Reader} after the match for not noticing him sooner.

——

With the Trickster and Reader

——

As soon as {Reader} saw the Trickster enter his view he stood up excitedly. Flinching as there was the loud bang from the sky again, though he recovered quickly and practically hopped over to the Trickster.

“Look! Look! Trickster look!” {Reader} shouted happily as he practically shoved the back of the picture of Trickster into his abdomen.

“Hmm?~ what’s this now?” The Trickster said as he slowly grabbed the pictures {Reader} had drawn on the back of his autograph.

{Reader} seemed excited by the question, “it’s you, me, and pebble!!” Poking the back, or the front, of the piece of paper.

Trickster knelt down and put the photo between him and {Reader} “okay now show me who is who.”

“That’s you!” {Reader} said as he poked the person on the left, “me, and than pebble!” as {Reader} listed the names he poked the drawing on the right, and then the one in the middle.

“Oh here!” {Reader} said as he grabbed the paper out of the Trickster’s hands and started writing on the photo.

“There! Now you know who is who!” {Reader} exclaimed happily as he held the now labeled pictures of the three towards the Trickster.

“Why thank you dear~” Trickster dragged out his words as he grabbed the paper and stood up.

“Follow me, we got to bring you back to camp at some point.” The adult male laughed, {Reader} giving him a confused look as he followed behind.

“Camp?”

Trickster proceeded to explain that after the trial, they would arrive back into the forest of “the safe realm” where if anyone hurts anyone, they get punished, and that there were two campsites in the “safe realm’s” forest.

One for killers, like him, and one for survivors.

“You’ll go to the survivor one.”

“Why?”

“Cause you’re a survivor.”

“But.. you were nice to me, so I wanna go with you!” {Reader} said as he stopped following Trickster and stomped his foot.

Trickster laughed nervously.

Please tell me this kid wasn’t about to throw a tantrum.

‘Come on, come on…. Think, dammit! Think!’ The Trickster cursed at himself. He didn’t know how to handle kids! Much less an upset one!!

“Uh- well you could always just come to the killer camp when you want..” Trickster paused.

Did he just tell a child… A CHILD, that they could COME TO THE KILLERS CAMPSITE WHENEVER HE WANTED?????

“Really?! Yay! Thank you uh…. Is your real name Trickster?”

“Hmm?~ Of course not! It’s just a flashy nickname!” Trickster smiled.

“Oh.. so what do I call you?”

“Trickster?” The Trickster said, questioning the child.

“Oh! Do you wanna call me by something different? Is that it?” {Reader} only nodded in reply.

Trickster laughed at the child, such a weird little thing he was.

“Hmmm Ji-Ji sound good to you kid? It’s as close as you’ll get to my real name” Trickster said as he held back a laugh.

{Reader} nodded vigorously.

“Alright then kiddo,” Trickster started as he began to hear the hatch, “what about you, ya haven’t told me your name ya know, I can just keep calling you dear and kid after all.”

{Reader}’s eyes sparkled slightly once again “{Reader}!”

“Well then {Reader}, you see that thing?” Trickster said as he knelt down a bit “that’s the hatch, it’s another escape you can use, you got that?”

{Reader} nodded.

“You go through there, I’ll see you soon alright? Just go to the survivor campsite, I’ll come get you after awhile so you won’t be lonely.” As Trickster said this {Reader} nodded quickly, a toothy smiley adorned his face as he did so.

“Okay! Bye Ji-Ji!!” {Reader} shouted as he waved and jumped into the hatch.

Black taking over the Tricksters vision.

He’d have to explain to the other killers about the new survivor situation, but that wasn’t his first priority.

His first priority is seeing if the Entity would get him that damned coat.

——

Entity’s Records:

——

New Offering:

Child’s Autograph

-strengthens the heart, allowing the killer to perform actions such as vaulting, damaging gens, and breaking pallets 5% faster

#x male reader #x reader #dbd fanfic #dbd x male reader #dbd x reader #dead by daylight #x child reader #trickster x reader #ji woon hak x reader

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taestefully-in-luv · 3 years

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Always You | JJK (Eight-Part 1)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 11.5k (part 1)

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (!!!), mentions of sex, oc struggles with her future, mentions of vibrator, mentions of cum eating, dirty talk, vaginal fingering, oral (female receiving), masturbation, swallowing

Notes: I am having to post this chapter in two parts, I am so sorry about that! But here it is!! Hope you guys enjoy this chapter:) feel free to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) I LOVE talking with ya’ll!

Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @aclowe13 @bishuthot @271101 @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch @not-your-lion @flowersgirl02 @justinetingball @fiantomartell @fairysunooo @taebae19

Previous ---- Next

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

September

“What about this one?” You hold up another birthday banner, showing Vanessa yet another option.

“Ugly.” She says.

This is the fourth fucking birthday banner you’ve shown her and she doesn’t approve of any of them. But you have to admit this one is a little ugly.

“Vanessa…” you groan out, getting very obviously frustrated.

“I like this one.” She points to a banner. The very first one you showed her.

“Seriously?” you grab the banner and place it in your cart. “Okay, we still have to pick up the cake at 3. And we need to make sure we have enough plates for everyone…oh! We also still have to pick up the bottles at the liquor store.”

“I can get the cake.” She replies smoothly.

“We can just go together?”

Today is Jungkook’s birthday and you and Vanessa have been (Kind of) texting throughout the last week trying to find a good day to meet up. The day happened to be today of all days, so you’re feeling quite rushed.

“Fine.” Vanessa picks at her cuticles, just standing here looking gorgeous.

You on the other hand…were not expecting this to be a fashion show! You’re in shorts and a t shirt while she wears a flowy green dress and sandals.

“I want to be the one to present his cake to him though,” Vanessa begins, her eyes never leaving her fingers, “I am his girlfriend after all.”

You hate that your chest tightens at her words, you hate how her words affect you like this, how she affects you like this. Just being in her presence alone makes your heart twist.

“Got it.” You place some birthday plates in the cart, “So…what did you get him for his birthday?” you try to make conversation.

“A cologne.”

“You know he’s sensitive to smells—”

“He likes this one.”

“Oh.”

“I know him better than you think y/n.” her smooth voice cuts you like a butcher knife.

You nod your head, not knowing what to say. Maybe she does. But like, you still know him better right? You got to, right?

“What about you?” Vanessa lifts her eyes to meet yours, her eyes are small and dark and inviting.

“Uh, to be honest…I’m meeting with Jimin after this so we can go shopping for his gifts. So, I don’t know yet but I have an idea.”

“And what’s your idea?” her eyes go back down to her nails that she keeps picking at.

“Friendship bracelets.” You state.

“Hm.” Vanessa pushes the cart forward and walks towards the isle with candles. “We still need nice candles for the cake.”

“Right.”

~~~~~~~

“It couldn’t have been that bad, babe.” Jimin holds up a plain black hoodie and nods approvingly. “Another one for his collection, what do you think?”

“Looks like something I’d steal, so yes.” You give him a quick thumbs up, “And it was bad dude. She’s so hard to talk to!”

“Yeah, I could see that.” Jimin stands in front of a full body length mirror and checks himself out, pushing his hair out of his face. “Forehead or no forehead, tonight?”

“Hmm, no forehead.”

“Forehead it is.”

“Wow, you never listen to me!”

Jimin chuckles wholeheartedly, shrugging his shoulders like he agrees with you.

“So, where are these bracelets you keep going on about?”

“That one weird shop buy the smoothie place has these cute bracelets with letters for names on them! I was thinking I could get him a black one with my initial on it and I would get myself one with his initial.”

“You guys are so…that’s cute I guess.” Jimin giggles, he holds up his wrist as if imagining himself with the bracelet. “I want one too!” he whines.

“Maybe for your birthday.” You wink. “Anyway, do you think Vanessa knows Jungkook better than me?”

Jimin stops walking to get a look at you, an expressions that reads: Are you serious? Plastered on his face.

“It’s a valid question.” You say.

“No one knows Jungkook like you honey.”

“Okay…Also, you’ll be meeting my friend Yoongi tonight!”

“The not date, date guy?” Jimin pouts, “I thought you weren’t going to lead him on…”

You scrunch up your face in confusion,

“I can have friends Jimin, I’m not leading him on!” you try to defend.

“If you say so. Just like, try to focus on one boy at a time, you know?” Jimin teases.

You two walk to the shop that sells the bracelets and go inside. You find the bracelets you’re looking for rather quickly, feeling nice and lucky. You grab them and go to pay, when you finish up at the register you notice a Jack Skellington key chain and add it on to Jungkook’s gifts. You always have trouble finding good gifts for people, okay? You take what you can get.

“Shit, it’s already 6. I still need to go home and get ready!”

~~~~~

Nick lets you and Vanessa use their place as the spot to celebrate, it’s bigger than your place and Vanessa agrees saying it’s bigger than hers as well. Nick and his bro that believes in aliens (You really got to learn his name but at this point you are too afraid to ask) are the only ones here as you and Vanessa set up.

“Bro AI is out to get us man—” Aaanndd you are tuning him out, you watch as Nick listens closely, nodding his head every few minutes and whispering ‘Bro’. You and Vanessa hang up decorations in silence, the sound of Nick and his bro chatting away filling the room.

“People should start arriving soon…” you try to make small talk with Vanessa, she only hums in response not even sparing you a glance.

“You look nice.” You try giving her a compliment, she turns her head to the side to look at you and a sly smile grows on her face.

“Do you have feelings for Jungkook?”

You immediately choke on your fucking spit, what the actual fuck? You try to compose yourself when you hear the front door opening. Thank God.

“It is I!” You know that voice. “Where is my Jungkookie?” You hear Jin entering the living room along with Namjoon and Hobi.

“Jimin should be bringing him in the next 30 or so minutes!” you yell out. Once Jin and the other two boys spot you they light up.

“y/n!!!” Jin hurries to your side and bring you in for a quick hug. “How are you?!”

“Good, good.” You laugh, hugging him back.

“Good to see you y/n” Namjoon says with a soft smile and then you hear your named being shouted even though Hobi is a foot away from you.

“Long time no see!!!” He hugs you, shaking you around in his embrace. You can’t help but chuckle at your friend.

“Hi guys, I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Would we miss our Jungkookie’s birthday? No way.” Jin says.

“Oh,” you turn around to see Vanessa just standing behind you, not saying anything just staring. “This is Vanessa. Jungkook’s—”

“We know!” Hobi says, “Jungkook has brought her to Jin’s. Nice to see you again Vanessa!”

Vanessa tilts her head and nods, her lips not even attempting to curve into a smile.

“You too.” She finally says.

This girl either has no manners or just does not know how to properly socialize? Maybe she gets anxiety being around too many people?

You feel your phone buzz.

Yoongs 7:14pm

Im outside

“Be right back guys, a friend of mine just got here.” You try talking over your group of friends. You head towards the front door, swinging it open to a Min Yoongi waiting patiently.

He smiles at you when he sees you, he holds up a bottle of wine and shakes it around a bit.

“For the party.” He says.

“Perfect, let’s pour us a glass right now!” you gesture him to enter the apartment.

You two walk into the kitchen, and you start searching for a wine bottle opener but can’t seem to find it.

“Hey Nick!” You yell out, hoping to get his attention, “Where’s the wine opener?”

Nick shuffles into the kitchen and gives you an expression that screams he has no idea.

“I know where it’s at.” Vanessa’s silky voice fills your ears as she enters the kitchen.

“Oh.” Of course she does. Why wouldn’t Vanessa know? She probably comes here more than you do…

“Thanks.” You finally say when she hands you the wine opener.

“Well, let’s open this baby up!” you turn to face Yoongi and he smiles at you.

“Hi Vanessa.” Yoongi waves at the girl and she hums in response, walking out of the kitchen.

“Sorry, she’s…” but you don’t know what to say. Also, why are you trying to excuse her?

You pour you and Yoongi a glass and gulp it down quickly, you finish your first glass in just seconds.

“I need another one.”

“What’s got you so stressed in a time of celebration?” Yoongi casually sips on his wine, one baby sip after the other.

“Nothing, nothing.”

“y/n…” his soft tone makes you feel comforted already and he hasn’t even said anything yet.

“I don’t know how to say it without sounding psychotic.” You admit, pouring yourself your second glass of wine.

“Try me.”

“I feel like I am competing…with…”

“With Vanessa?” He gladly finishes for you.

“Yeah, like…I don’t know, I feel like she’s trying to take my place. But my place isn’t ‘girlfriend’ so I don’t know what I’m freaking out about.”

Yoongi sets his glass down and studies you for a moment, you begin to feel antsy under his gaze.

“I’m obviously on your side,” Yoongi begins in a hushed voice, “But maybe she’s worried too?”

“I wish I knew if she felt worried, or felt like, anything. This girl is hard to crack!” you quietly say.

“Just try to enjoy the night, okay?” Yoongi smiles and you don’t even feel like smiling back but you do. Suddenly, you feel your phone going off.

Jungkook 7:32pm

Why is Jimin making me dress up? I thought it was just a couple of us? Why do I need to look nice, I’m tired from work

Jungkook 7:33pm

Seriously y/n…it’s just a couple of us, right?

y/n 7:35pm

omg yes Jungkook it’s nothing big I swear, he just wants you to look nice for pictures

Jungkook 7:36pm

I always look nice for pics lol

y/n 7:38pm

No comment

Jungkook 7:40pm

Don’t be fukin rude

` y/n 7:40pm

Can you guys hurry up?

Jungkook 7:44pm

Jimin is in the mirror deciding if he’s showing his forehead or not

y/n 7:45pm

classic Jimin

Jungkook 7:45pm

Classic Jimin

You stuff your phone in your back pocket and grab your glass of wine and begin sipping on it again. Yoongi eyes you up and smirks.

“That the birthday boy?”

“Hm? Oh, sorry…yes. He and Jimin should be here soon.” You watch as Yoongi nods his head and then you realize…”Oh my god, let me introduce you to the guys!” you set your glass down on the counter and reach for Yoongi’s hand and pull him towards the living room. Unfortunately for you, you miss the way Yoongi blushes at the contact.

“Guys, guys.” You interrupt the boys from their conversations, “This is my friend Yoongi…” you gesture towards the boy, “Yoongi, this is Jin…Namjoon, Hobi, and Nick and his pal, uh…” you blink at Alien Dude and he just grins at you, not realizing you don’t know his fucking name. “Yeah, anyway.” You decide to move on, “Jungkook and Jimin should be here soon—” Suddenly, there is soft knocking on the door. You raise a brow because who else could it be?

You walk towards the front door and look through the peep hole and much to your surprise you see Holly and Trina waiting outside the door. You’re quick to open it with a wide smile on your face.

“I thought you didn’t want to come?” You ask, your question directed towards Trina.

“I…” her eyes slide to Holly, “…Had a change of heart.” She huffs out quietly.

“You’re going to be civil?” you smirk at your friend and she rolls her eyes at you.

“She’s going to be more than civil.” Holly pipes up, “She’s going to be nice.”

“Hey we never agreed to that!” Trina crosses her arms over her chest, “But whatever.”

“Thanks for coming T.” your smirk transitions into a soft smile. This means a lot to you, that Trina is trying to accept Jungkook.

“Well? Are you going to let us in or what?”

“Right, right.” You move to the side and let the girls through. They step inside and make their way towards the boys.

“Oh? You must be Mister Oatmeal Raisin!” Trina grins towards Yoongi, who stands here chatting with Hobi.

“You’re…let me guess, Trina? And you must be Holly?” he nods at both girls, “I’ve heard a lot about you two.”

“I hope good things?” Trina teases.

“Only the best.” Yoongi raises his glass to her and she turns her head to smirk at you.

You watch as everyone gets along, talking, laughing and having a good time—all except Vanessa. She is sitting on the sofa on her phone, tapping away. She doesn’t even try to converse with any of Jungkook’s friends? Strange. You hate her, technically. But you can’t help but feel bad? Like, why does she isolate herself so much? Does she really just have some social anxiety or something? There’s got to be a reason for her odd behavior.

“Hey.” You say, sitting on the sofa next to her. “You okay?”

“Hm?” Vanessa doesn’t look up from her phone as she barely acknowledges you.

“Why don’t you come hang out with the rest of us?”

Vanessa tilts her head to get a look at you and she blinks at you repeatedly.

“Why?” she finally asks. “I’m only here for Jungkook.”

Okay, ouch.

“Oh...well—”

“You never answered my question from earlier,” Vanessas coy smile begins growing on her face. “How you feel about Jungkook.”

You feel your palms get sweaty when you process her words. How the hell do you respond to that?

“I—I…” Then the front door is opening and you hear Jimin obnoxiously announce their arrival, that he has the birthday boy.

You immediately jump to your feet and rush towards the entrance of the apartment to greet your friends.

“Too bad you can’t admit it, “ Vanessa whispers, her eyes going back to her phone, “I could help you too.”

“JUNGKOOKIE!!!” Jin opens his arms wide, “Come and embrace me! It’s your birthday gift.” Jungkook stumbles in the apartment with wide eyes as he searches the living room. His eyes find yours and he smiles. He shows you his bunny grin and you can’t help but smile back. He looks breathtaking, Jimin didn’t play around picking Jungkook’s outfit. Ripped black jeans, chunky boots, a plaid shirt with a leather jacket—he looks hot as hell. Vanessa is a lucky girl, you think bitterly to yourself.

Jungkook greets his friends one by one until he sees Yoongi walk from the kitchen into the living room. Yoongi has refilled his wine glass and stops just in front of Jungkook and bows his head in greeting. You rush to the two boys, joining them in this awkward encounter.

“Oh, I invited Yoongi.” You begin to explain, “You remember Yoongi, right?” you ask Jungkook.

“Of course…” Jungkook tries smiling but it’s tense and strained. At this, Yoongi smirks.

Yoongi steps closer to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder and he smiles at Jungkook.

“I’m y/n’s plus one tonight—or I guess her…date?”

“D-Date?” You and Jungkook both stutter out.

Yoongi brings you in closer, nice and snug against his shoulder as he chuckles.

“Something like that.”

Jungkook tries releasing a breath but finds it to be troublesome. He looks at you with an expression you cannot really decipher, but he doesn’t look all too pleased.

“That’s nice.” He finally says, scratching the back of his neck.

“What’s nice?” It’s a smooth and silky voice. Vanessa. “Happy birthday babe.” She joins your circle next to Jungkook and places a kiss on his cheek.

“Right…” you butt in, “Happy birthday Jungkook.” You smile, still in Yoongi’s arms.

“What do you want to do first?” Vanessa links arms with Jungkook and you feel your body go tense. You don’t want her to touch him.

“Eat.” Jungkook laughs, “I’m so hungry.”

“Well, we have pizza for everyone.” You say loudly, getting the rest of everyone’s attention.

“You say pizza? Hell yeah.” Trina walks towards you four with Holly following behind her.

“Oh hey Trina…” Jungkook says, not entirely too sure how to talk to the girl that hates him.

“Hey Jungkook,” she says quickly with a smile, “So where’s the pizza?”

Jungkook and you share a look of pleasant surprise. Trina? Being nice?

The rest of the boys follow and you all head inside the kitchen to snag a few slices of pizza from the pizzeria that Jungkook is fond of. Vanessa stays close to Jungkook’s side, not that you are surprised. But what is surprising you is that Yoongi has suddenly become slightly more affectionate with you?

Yoongi takes any chance he can get to touch you in some way, whether it be picking a piece of thread off your shirt, or placing a wild strand of hair behind your ear. He doesn’t really strike you as the type to be so openly affectionate…at least not the one to initiate it.

But can picking a piece of thread off your shirt really be counted as affectionate? Maybe he’s just trying to help. What you don’t know though…Jungkook has picked up on too. He has watched as Yoongi smiles at you and you smile back, he has watched as Yoongi subtlety touches your arm when he talks to you and how your hand finds his shoulder when you laugh.

Jungkook sits on his couch, chowing down on a slice of pizza as he glares at you and Yoongi. He doesn’t mean to glare but why is he here? This is a small get together between close friends. How close have you and Yoongi gotten?

“And then bro, I was like no fucking way bro.” Alien bro talks animatedly, his hands motioning all around the place.

Nick stuffs another slice of pizza in his mouth, nodding along to Alien bro’s story.

“That is fucking wild.” You hear Trina pitch in, “Like, did that really happen to you?”

“It may have been a dream, but let me tell you…” Alien bro closes his eyes, “I think it was real, like a memory.”

You internally laugh, because this dude has got some wild fucking stories and you don’t know how to take him seriously. But everyone seems to be enjoying it.

“Let’s do cake!” You hear Jimin yell out, “I have such a sweet tooth right now.”

At this you see Vanessa actually light up, like she has been waiting all night for someone to mention the cake. You two agreed she could present it to Jungkook, maybe that’s why she’s so visibly excited.

“I’ll go get it…” She speaks up, “I’ll be right back.” She says, facing Jungkook. Vanessa stands from her spot next to Jungkook on the couch and heads towards the kitchen.

A few minutes pass by when you hear your name being called. You get up and walk to the kitchen when you see Vanessa with the cake in her hands, the candles already lit up.

“Can you turn off the lights?” she asks, “And you can start the Birthday song.”

You nod your head, walking back into the living room to switch the lights off.

“Okay, ready Jungkook?” you smile at him and he rolls his eyes with a smirk.

“I guess.” He says, amusement laced in his voice.

“Happy birthday to you!” you begin singing, the rest of the gang joins in and the living room is soon being filled with the sound of everyone’s voices singing Jungkook a happy birthday. You pull out your phone and begin recording, Vanessa walks in with the cake and she keeps her face neutral. She doesn’t even sing, wow. You can’t help but kind of laugh, that’s so in character for her.

“Happy birthday dear Juuuungkoook, Happy birthday to you!” You all finish up and start whooping and hollering.

“Make a wish.” Vanessa sets the cake down in front of him and Jungkook nods his head. He takes a deep breath before his eyes find yours. You guys share a brief moment before he’s blowing out his candles.

“What did you wish for?!” Hobi asks, excitement filling the room as everyone agrees that they want to know.

“Secret.” He says, still looking at you.

“Here,” Vanessa nudges a perfectly wrapped box in Jungkook’s hands, “Present.”

“You didn’t have to Vanessa.” Jungkook grins at her but he’s already unwrapping his gift, he throws the wrapping paper to the floor and takes a look at the cologne box.

“This is so expensive!” he whines, “But thank you!” He looks at you for a moment when he awkwardly pecks Vanessas lips in front of everyone.

“My turn!” Jimin shouts, “My turn, my turn!” he stands up and walks by the front door where he left the gift. He picks up the bag and walks back into the living room, standing in front of Jungkook, handing him the bag.

“You’ll love it.” Jimin wiggles his brows at the boy.

Jungkook wiggles his brows back as he opens up the bag and pulls out a black hoodie.

“Fuck yeah.” Jungkook stands up to hug Jimin, “This one is so soft.”

The rest of the gang gives Jungkook a gift one by one until all eyes are on you. Suddenly, you feel super fucking shy and lame that you got matching bracelets.

“Uh, I haven’t gotten anything for you yet…” you lie. “But I will soon, promise.”

Jungkook’s bunny smile begins to fade as he processes your words,

“No worries, y/n.” he smiles again, “You don’t have to get me anything.”

“It’s just a little late, is all.” You shift awkwardly from one foot to another. You wish you weren’t such an idiot. You notice Jimin staring at you from across the room, he looks disappointed.

“What about the bracelets y/n?” Vanessa’s voice can be heard by everyone. She looks at you with a blank expression and you never wanted to strangle someone more.

“What bracelets?” Jungkook’s curiosity showing.

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. They’re friendship bracelets. Such a sweet idea.” Vanessa smiles at you.

“You got me and you friendship bracelets?” Jungkook stands up and walks to you, he extends his right hand out and waits expectantly.

“Thanks Vanessa.” You deadpan.

“No problem.”

“It’s really nothing Jungkook…”

“I want the damn bracelet y/n.”

You stare at him for a moment, his big doe eyes making you feel like you must give in.

“okay, they’re in my bag…” you turn around and search for your purse. You notice Yoongi trying to hand it you and you smile at him gratefully.

“Here.” You hand him his bracelet and he inspects it, rolling it through his fingers.

“Your initial?” Jungkook clenches the bracelet in his fist and looks up at you.

“I fucking love it.” He brings the bracelet to his heart, “I will wear it every day.”

“I have one too…” you pull it from your bag and dangle in around.

“It has a J?” Jungkook bunny smile grows ten times as wide. He takes the bracelet from your fingers and chuckles at the two bracelets.

“I love it.��

“I’m glad you like it—”

“No, love it. I love…” Then he’s clearing his throat, remembering he is in a room full of people.

“Thank you.”

“Oh! There’s one more thing…” you pull out the key chain and you watch as Jungkook’s face lights up. Of course he is more excited about the key chain, you laugh.

“Fucking awesome!” Jungkook takes it from you, “I’ll put it on my keys!”

“That’s the idea,” you chuckle. “Anyway, let’s play games now.”

You and Jungkook stand at the front of the living room, in front of the T.V in battle mode.

“You’re going down Jeon.” You snicker at him, he only rolls his eyes at you as he readies himself.

“I’m just glad I’m not going against Jimin.” Jungkook shoots Jimin a look and Jimin winks.

You two have to chug an entire beer can, trying to beat the other.

“Honestly, same.” You admit, if anyone can down a drink in seconds—it’s Jimin.

Trina stands up and joins your side,

“Okay, are we ready everyone?”

Everyone begins cheering, the sound motivating you and making you feel excited.

“Okay. When I yell…BAM…you start drinking and don’t stop until that can is empty…got it?”

“Yes, we know how to chug a drink, Trina.”

“Damn girl, I was just sayin’.” Trina throws a hand on her hip, “Okay, 3…2…1…BAM!”

You and Jungkook scramble to start drinking, the chilly liquid making its way down your throats. The drink is cold and carbonated and you’re trying to ignore the way it sizzles, instead pretending it’s as smooth as water and you down it back.

“Jungkook is going to win!” Namjoon yells out, he has risen to his feet, the excitement too much.

“No, y/n is! Look how much her head it tilting back!” You hear Jin chime in.

Truth is, you aren’t really sure how much you’ve drank, or how much is left! You’re just wanting it to be over!

“Holy shit, they’re both so close!”

“Broooooooo”

And right as you’re about to finish your drink you hear the sound of a can being crushed right next to you. He won.

“WHAT’S UP…LOSER!” Jungkook shakes his empty, crushed can in your face as you finally finish your own drink.

“Okay, okay. Literally only let you win because it’s your birthday.” You snide playfully.

“Sure y/n, sure.” Jungkook grins down at you, his laughter bounces off the walls and you feel so whole when you hear the sound. He leans forward until his arms are wrapped around you in a quick yet loving hug.

“Whatever you got to say to yourself…loser.” He chuckles out, letting go of you.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” Your pout is so cute, Jungkook thinks.

Yoongi stands up, his gummy smile lighting up the room as he approaches you two. He stands next to you and asks if you’re alright.

“You’ve already had so much to drink, I’m just making sure you can make it back to the sofa.” Yoongi’s shoulders shake as he laughs.

“She can handle herself.” You hear Jungkook say in a somewhat serious tone, “She knows how to drink.” He tries to say a little more lightly.

“But she doesn’t really have to do the penalty, right?” Yoongi asks.

“No, I definitely do.” You laugh out, “Where’s the shot, huh?”

Jungkook gives you a silly looking smirk as he heads towards the kitchen to fetch you that shot. He’s only gone for a moment when you realize he has returned with the liquid of fire.

“For you, princess.”

You roll your eyes at his little nick name he’s given you but you cannot help the blush that creeps on your cheeks…

“Please…please.” You pant, rolling your hips into his as you meet his desperate thrusts.

“Please what, princess?” he breathes out heavily, “Told you that when you’re with—” He begins fucking into you faster, “When you’re with me…to use your words.” His pace is bruising, causing you to choke on the air around you.

The little nick name causing you to remember something you have tied burying.

“I think you should take one too, since it is your birthday after all.” You tease.

“But I’m the winner…” Jungkook pouts, his bottom lip jutting out so far.

“Come on, I bet you won’t.” Jimin pipes in.

“Yeah dude.” You hear Nick say.

“FINE!” Jungkook throws his hands up in defeat, “But you have to go pour it for me.” He says, looking at you.

“Done deal, baby.”

“Pour me one too.” Vanessa walks up to you, her strap on her shoulder sliding down.

“Oh?” you ask, but you nod your head in approval and head towards the kitchen to pour two more shots.

You return with the shots, but feel your stomach drop when you see Jungkook and Vanessa laughing together, her hand laying on his chest, his arm wrapped around her waist.

“Oh!” Jungkook looks at you and smiles, “The shots!”

“Yeah…”

And then Min Yoongi is at your side with his own shot, he looks at you and gives you a sweet smile and eyes full of understanding.

“Let’s take them.” He says. His hand going to yours, he squeezes it tight and you feel yourself trying to breathe.

“Here you go.” You hand the two shots to Jungkook and Vanessa, they take them and you four look at one another before raising your glasses.

“Happy birthday, Jungkook.” You whisper, taking the shot.

Hours pass, and things are starting to wind down, you think. Jin, Namjoon and Hobi are at the front door saying their goodbyes and you feel your time is coming soon too.

“Us too.” Trina says, “Our uber is almost here.” Her and Holly gather their things and make their way out the door.

“Jimin, you coming with us?” Trina asks.

“Um, what about you y/n?” Jimin makes it to your side, his hand going to rub your shoulder.

“You guys go without me, I’m going to help clean up. Hostess duties!” You salute towards your friends and they giggle.

“Okay babe, I’ll see you soon?” Jimin goes in for a tight hug and you hug him back even tighter.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll help you clean up.” Yoongi offers, but you shake your head.

“No, I couldn’t ask that. Me and Vanessa got it. You go home too, it’s so late. I will come by to see you soon though.”

“Are you sure?” Yoongi asks as he catches Jungkook watching you two. “Well, if you insist y/n.” he inches towards you and to your surprise, you feel his lips leave a small kiss on your cheek. Yoongi smirks when he sees Jungkook react. Jungkook glares at the boy and Yoongi feels like hopefully he helped enough tonight.

“What was that for?” you feel yourself turn red.

“Nothing.” He whispers before he’s turning around and walking out of the door.

You are left here shocked and confused but you cannot help but smile at Yoongi’s small gesture. He really is too sweet.

“Well,” you turn around to face Jungkook and Vanessa, “Let’s clean up,” you say to Vanessa, “And then I’ll get out of your hair.”

“Actually,” Vanessa curls her lips upwards, “I am feeling quite tired.” Her eyes find yours, “So maybe Jungkook can help you clean up.”

“You’re going home already?” Jungkook looks confused. He was probably expecting birthday sex or some shit.

“Mhm.” She breathes out easily, “See you later babe.” She leans over and pecks his cheek, you immediately twist your head to look away. Vanessa notices and she fucking smiles that sly ass smile. “See you later, y/n.”

And with that she is out of the apartment, leaving just you and Jungkook and Nick and Alien Bro.

“We will be out on the balcony smoking, if you guys want to join.” Nick offers to you, but you’re shaking your head no.

“Nah, you guys enjoy.” Jungkook says. Nick and Alien bro (You really got to learn this dudes name) are opening the back door and leaving you guys for the balcony.

“And then there was two.” Jungkook jokes, he chews on his lips as he watches you begin the cleaning up process. You get a large black trash bag and start throwing away the empty beer bottles and other trash around the living room and kitchen.

“Help me clean, birthday boy.”

Jungkook grins at you and starts helping, he’s gathering the shot glasses and setting them in the kitchen sink. You two work like this for around 10-15 minutes when the place is finally looking like his apartment again.

“Well, I guess that’s it.” You set the last trash bag in the kitchen, “You and Nick can take these out later, right?” “Yes, y/n. You did enough, I swear.” Jungkook smiles at you. “Hey, where’s your bracelet?” he dangles his wrist around, showing you his.

“Oh…” You dig around in your pockets until you finally find the piece of jewelry.

“Let me.” Jungkook stands closer to you, reaching his hand out, expecting you to hand over the bracelet. You place it in his hand and he grabs your wrist and clips the bracelet on.

“There.” He breathes out, “Never take it off.” He half jokes.

“You really like it?”

“I really love it.” Jungkook pulls you in for a hug, but he’s letting go much faster than you would like.

“Wanna chill for a bit?” He asks you, his hands still on your arms from your hug that you just shared.

“For a bit, sure.”

You two walk to the living room sofa and plop down, the long day finally catching up to you. It’s around 1 am now, you’ve been running around all day.

“So…” Jungkook looks at you with an unreadable expression, “What’s going on with you and this Yoongi guy?”

“What do you mean?”

“Was tonight like, a date for you two?”

“What? No?”

“Really? Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.”

“He was just joking…I think.” You groan into your hands, and laugh. “Why?”

“I was just wondering.” He turns to face forward, his face hardening as he thinks. “Is he going to be like, your boyfriend?”

“What?!” you choke on your spit, “Yoongi is my friend.”

“Does he know that?” Jungkook continues to look forward, “He was all over you.”

“He definitely was not all over me. Oh my god. What are you getting so crazy for?”

Crazy. That’s the word you use, but he knows you mean jealous. Jungkook sits here, biting on his bottom lip. He has to admit, he doesn’t like this ‘crazy’ feeling. He feels like he’s suffocating just remembering you with Yoongi tonight. He has no right to feel crazy or jealous. He has a girlfriend for fucks sake!

“I just hope he’s treating you right.”

“He’s just a friend Jungkook. But you know what? And if he was trying to date me?”

Jungkook feels his chest tighten, not liking the idea already.

“Then like I said, I hope he’s treating you right.” He says more softly, turning to look at you again.

“Did you enjoy your birthday?”

“It was nice, thank you.”

“What’s your favorite birthday in your life so far?”

Jungkook tilts his head as he thinks, rocking it side to side. He folds his arms behind his head and lets out a long breath.

“There’s two I can think of.” He says, “When I was 10 all I wanted to do was see one of those drive thru zoo things. But I wasn’t expecting much because I guess birthdays and holidays were stressful for my parents…” he takes a deep breath, “they always fought so much and so I didn’t think we would be doing anything for my birthday at all. But they for once, they got along this day. They took me to the zoo and I just remember being so on edge like something may go wrong…but it never did, it was a perfect day.”

“I bet 10 year old Jungkook was so cute.”

“I was the cutest!”

“And what’s the second?”

“Sophomore year of college.” He states quickly making you choke on air. Really? That birthday of all birthdays?

“Jungkook, there has to be a better one than that…” you begin, “We literally didn’t even do anything.”

It seemed everyone happened to become busy the day of Jungkook’s birthday, everyone except you. You and Jungkook spent the day just the two of you in his dorm room watching movies and playing video games. You didn’t even buy him a present, much too broke!

“That day meant a lot to me.” Jungkook explains, “You didn’t leave my side, no matter what.”

“Well, you were my best friend.”

“And now?” Jungkook turns his head to face you, “Am I your best friend now?”

“Jungkook…” you caress his thigh, “Of course.”

Jungkook throws his head back as he smiles that bunny smile and you can’t help but giggle.

“Were you worried?”

“So worried.” He continues to laugh, “You’re my best friend too.”

~~~~~

October

“I don’t know guys!” you whine, bringing the cup of coffee in for a sip. “Marketing…can someone even be passionate about that?”

“What did I say y/n? You’re so concerned if you’re passionate or not, why don’t you start off small—finding something you just like.” Yoongi offers his piece of advice but you groan.

“What do you think Tae?” you point your head in his direction, “Wait, I am asking one of the most passionate people I know.” You complain.

“I agree with Yoongi, y/n.” Taehyung says, he drinks his water in gulps.

“Of course, who wouldn’t agree with Yoongi?” You hit your head on the table a few times.

You three are seated in Yoongi’s record shop in the cozy corner of the store, discussing the burden of dreams.

“I mean, guys.” You begin, “I don’t want to be making cookies forever.”

“But I really like them.” Yoongi whispers.

“Me too,” Taehyung says as he shoves a sugar cookie down his throat. “So good.”

“Guys, you aren’t helping.”

“Honestly y/n…” Yoongi stands from his seat to get some more coffee, “Stop trying to force a dream to happen. It will come to you naturally, just trust in that.”

“You make it sound so easy.” You hand Taehyung another cookie and he takes it with a grin.

“So y/n…” Taehyung swallows down the last bits of the cookie before he’s turning to face you in his chair, “How was Jungkook’s birthday, I forgot to ask.”

“It went really well actually.”

“Why do you say ‘actually’?” Taehyung laughs, “Were you expecting it to go bad?”

“It’s not that…I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Is it because of Vanessa?” Yoongi comes back with two fresh coffees.

“Maybe.”

“That’s his girlfriend, right? I just don’t get it. Should we come up with an evil plan to break them up?” Taehyung snickers.

“Tae, chill.” You giggle.

“I’m joking but I am also totally serious.” He comments. “Anyway guys, I gotta head back to the museum. But same time next week?”

“You know it.” You blow on your hot coffee, waving him goodbye.

The last few weeks the three of you meet up for coffee (Tae usually brings his own drink of choice, says coffee is too bitter for him) and chit chat just like now. It’s an interesting group but you feel comfortable. After time has passed, forgiving and moving on from Taehyung’s crushing you has gotten easier and now you even find his friendship to be quite valuable. You guess they weren’t kidding when they say time heals all wounds.

“Are you two ever going to tell me what happened between you? You were so tense when he first started hanging out.” Yoongi says, observant as usual.

“I will. But another day,” you smile.

“No rush.” Yoongi drinks his coffee slowly, “Whenever you’re ready.”

“By the way, did it work?” Yoongi asks between sips.

You can’t help but raise your brows in question,

“Did what work?”

“Did Jungkook say anything? About being jealous?” He gives you a smirk.

“What are you talk—wait, were you purposely trying to be affectionate with me to see if Jungkook would get a rise out of it?” You ask, completely shocked. That seems almost out of character for Yoongi!

“I tried. I’m a little awkward being the first to show affection, “ he admits, “But for you, my friend, I was willing to try.” He gives you a shy smile and you feel your heart race.

“Yoongi—”

“You really don’t even have to answer because I know the truth. I could see it on his face, but I was curious if he said anything to you.”

You think back to Jungkook’s birthday and well…he technically did say something to you. He was being a little crazy (jealous) but you cannot understand why. Jungkook is your friend and not to mention he has a girlfriend.

“Sorry to disappoint Yoongs, but he did not.” You decide to say.

“Did you know you avoid all eye contact when you want to lie.” Yoongi takes another sip of his coffee, his sly smile telling you he knows the truth.

“Jeez, why do you pick up on things so quickly?!” you groan, “I can’t even tell one little nothing lie in front of you.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t try to lie to me then.” He laughs. “So what did he say?”

“He just—I don’t know. He just…wanted to know what was up with you basically.”

Yoongi opens his mouth to say ‘Ah’ and then continues to drink his coffee.

“He’s not going to be rude to you or anything!” you quickly say, “he’s just a little protective over me, is all.”

“Oh? That’s all?” Yoongi teases.

“Hey…” you set your cup down and fold your hands in your lap, “What makes you think Jungkook feels the same way?”

Yoongi breathes out slowly, his fingers tapping against his mug when he looks up at you and smiles.

“There’s an obvious tension between you two, “ he starts, “The way he looks at you. That honestly gave everything away. His eyes always find you, no matter what.” Yoongi quietly chuckles, “The way he’s threatened by me. He doesn’t even try to hide it.” Yoongi thinks for a moment, “And…you two, the way you are together…god, it’s like watching two people who are in a relationship but don’t know they’re in a relationship.”

“What—what do you mean by that?” you pry further. Curious about your own dynamic with Jungkook that maybe even you can’t see.

“I don’t know like, you guys act like boyfriend and girlfriend already!” he laughs, “That’s when I knew I didn’t stand a chance.”

“Yoongi…”

“It’s okay,” his gummy smile lights up his whole face, “being your friend has been so much more rewarding.”

You feel yourself smile at his words…although, you do feel bad. But keeping a friend like Yoongi around has been amazing. And maybe if you weren’t already in love with someone else…no, you shouldn’t even think that, that’s not fair.

“Thanks Yoongs.”

~~~~~~

“We need to talk.”

Jimin is shoving his way through Jungkook’s front door, his hair pushed back in frustration like his fingers have been running through it for hours.

“Jesus man, it’s like 8 in the fucking morning.” Jungkook’s low, groggy voice booms from his chest.

“This couldn’t wait. I have to be at work at 9 and I’ve been up all night with the same one thing on my mind.” Jimin takes off his shoes and makes his way to the couch.

“And what’s that?” Jungkook asks, clearly annoyed.

“You need to tell y/n how you feel.” Jimin decides to go with the straight forward approach, he does not have the time to beat around the bush today.

Jungkook closes the door and swings around to face Jimin,

“Huh?”

“Listen man, I’ve been racking my brain about it all fucking night. It’s got to be you. You have to do it, she won’t.”

“Why the fuck would I do that?”

“Grow the fucking balls, man!” Jimin sits back on the sofa, his head falling into the cushion.

“Look dude, I don’t know what you—”

“You’re in love with her, you have been since freshmen year. You guys fucked, I know. She didn’t talk to you for however long, I know that too. But come on man, it’s so clear how you both feel.”

Jungkook continues to stand here, not knowing what to say. Where is all this coming from?

“I have a girlfriend, Jimin.”

“Oh please, give me a fucking break.” Jimin stands up, walking towards Jungkook. “There is almost zero chemistry between you two. Like emotional chemistry…I don’t know what your sex life is like…” Jimin holds up a hand, “And I don’t want to know.”

“Wasn’t going to tell you anyway,” Jungkook pouts. “Listen, how can you be so sure y/n would even feel the same way?”

“Can’t you just fucking trust me?” Jimin yells out, exasperated.

“Did she say the words Jimin?” Jungkook becomes very serious, making Jimin shudder. “Did she tell you she has feelings for me?” his dark eyes pierce into Jimin’s.

Jimin looks down at the ground, feeling defeated.

“You know I can’t tell you that.” Jimin finally says, “You just have to have the courage man. Are you really going to go your whole life not telling her? Why torture yourself like that?”

Jungkook stands here feeling so lost, and fucking emotional. Like, he could god damn cry about it.

“Because,” Jungkook sniffles into his sleeve. “It’s guaranteed she would be in my life. I can’t risk losing her. I couldn’t handle that man…” Jungkook begins to choke up.

Jimin walks closer to Jungkook and pulls him in for a tight hug, Jungkook keeps his arms to his side.

“I know. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Jimin whispers.

“I think though…that there will be a moment where you finally have the courage…”

“I don’t know.”

“You will, Jungkook. When the timing is right…but I don’t know when that is for you two.”

“I really do love her…” Jungkook allows a few tears to slip from his closed eyes into Jimin’s shoulder. “I’m so frustrated like, all the time.” He admits, “Seeing her, talking to her, I just want to tell her how I feel. I hate how hard I have to try just to stay in the zone of friendship. But you don’t understand the risk…” Jungkook leans back, pulling away from Jimin. “If she doesn’t feel the same, I could lose her.” His puffy eyes avoid Jimin. “Can I handle a loss like that again?”

“But she…” Jimin has to bite his tongue…seeing his two best friends like this hurts his heart beyond belief.

“Yeah, I understand.” Jimin decides to say, “But I think you might be surprised.”

Jungkook pulls his brows together, his face scrunching up and he scoffs.

“Maybe, but maybe not.”

“I’m sorry to bring this all on you so early in the morning…I’ve just been so worried about you two…” Jimin starts to put his shoes back on.

“Maybe you could stay until you really need to leave for work? You still go like 45 minutes, right?” Jungkook practically begs with sad, soft eyes.

“Sure.” Jimin takes his shoes back off and grabs a hold of Jungkook’s shoulder, “Let’s sit down for a while.”

The two boys head to the couch and take a seat, leaving little space between them. Jungkook needs the presence of another human being right now, he needs to feel real live warmth. Jimin wishes he could mend Jungkook’s cracked heart but he knows only you can do that. But Jimin can try his best. The two sit in comfortable silence, the only sound that can be heard is Jungkook’s light sniffling and Jimin humming a soft tune.

“It’s almost 9.” Jimin mentions regretfully.

“I know. Thanks for staying for a bit.”

“Of course.” Jimin rises from the couch, “You guys are my best friends but you two sure are fucking idiots.” He smiles and makes his way to leave.

~~~~~~

Bored. So fucking bored. Trina and Holly went out for dinner tonight and you were not invited! You kind of wonder what’s going on between them…but that’s a thought for another day, right now you are so fucking bored.

It’s Friday night and you don’t know what to do with yourself. Jimin has some party he’s going to tonight but you didn’t really feel like going so you rejected his invitation, Jin and the guy’s invited you over for a cookout but you said no because you didn’t feel like driving all the way to Jin’s place—you know, lazy.

And you haven’t heard from Jungkook all day so he’s probably tired from work or worse—with Vanessa. But would it hurt to try? To see what he’s up to?

y/n 9:04pm

Jungkook 9:10pm

y/n 9:12pm

Whatcha up to tonight?

Jungkook 9:13pm

Nothing really, you?

y/n 9:13pm

nothing either…

y/n 9:13pm

Wanna have a movie night with some wine?

Jungkook 9:20pm

Sure:)

Jungkook 9:23pm

Lemme guess, I have to bring the wine

y/n 9:23pm

Bingo!

Jungkook 9:50pm

I’m almost there

Not even 5 minutes later you hear your door being knocked on, and you yell a ‘come in’. Jungkook pushes the door open and finds you sitting on the couch wrapped up in your favorite blanket. He shuts the door behind him, and walks to the kitchen for some wine glasses. You two only nod at one another in greeting, getting comfortable in each others presence.

“I brought 2 bottles,” Jungkook says, “One for you, one for me.”

“Wow, you’re so smart.” You smile up at him and his heart clenches in his chest. Your smile is so special, it’s so soft and so fucking pretty he almost cannot handle it.

“Y-Yeah.” He sets the glasses down on the table that sits in front of the sofa. “What movie do you have in mind?”

“You can choose.”

“Iron Man?” “No, not that.”

“Fine.” He pouts, “Let’s find something new on Netflix.”

An hour into some random drama, you find yourself getting sleepy.

“Wakey wakey.” You feel Jungkook’s breath on your ear, you open your eyes a little wider to prove your consciousness.

“I am awake…hey,” you suddenly get an idea, “Remember a little while ago you said you felt like our friendship kind of started over?”

“Hm? Yeah?”

“Would if we do?”

“I don’t get it?” Jungkook asks clearly confused.

“Let’s play a game! Of getting to know each other better. Everything out on the table.” You say with a pleased smile, obviously loving your own idea.

“hmmmmm…” Jungkook wraps his blanket closer around his body, “Sure.”

“Yay! I’ll pull out a list of questions from the internet.” You get your phone and google a list of questions. “You ready?” you say with a wink.

“I guess so.” He playfully shrugs his shoulders and shows you a small smile.

“Okay one…What’s your favorite way to spend a day off?”

“hmm…sleeping in, working out, playing video games, making videos, sleeping some more, hanging out with you.”

“Wow, honored.” You tease. “For me, it’s sleeping all day.”

“That’s it? That’s your whole answer?” Jungkook giggles.

“What type of music are into to?”

“y/n…” Jungkook whines, “You already know these answers…”

“We’re pretending we don’t!”

“Fine, I like almost all genres but I really prefer ballads.”

“I like music with meaningful lyrics,” you say.

“I agree.” Jungkook grins at you.

“Next…Do you have a favorite holiday. Why or why not?”

Jungkook nibbles on his lips as he thinks…is he honest?

“I use to hate holidays.” He admits softly, slightly slurring thanks to the wine, “But now it’s Christmas and New Year’s. And why? Both reasons are because of you.”

You feel your cheeks become warmer and probably pinker.

“Mine too.” You say quickly, “Next,” you are in a rush to change the subject. “Do you want a family of your own?”

“One day, yes. With the right person…”

“I’m the same.” You scroll through the questions, “If you had only one sense…hearing, touch, sight, etc, which would you want?”

“Touch. Imagine not being able to feel things?” Jungkook asks, he thinks about not being able to feel the soft touch of sheets on a bed, the feel of your hair between his fingers, your skin, your lips—wait, he needs to chill. “Yeah, touch.”

“Really? I would choose sight.” You say, “Who do you admire most in this world?”

“Mom.” Jungkook whispers, “She was so strong, she went through so much yet still found the strength to love me.”

“You.” Your hand finds Jungkook’s, you hold on to him softly, “My answer is you.”

“y/n…” Jungkook leans into your side, “Thank you.”

You clear you throat and continue scrolling through your phone, looking for the next question.

“If you found out today is your last day on Earth, what would you do?”

“Exactly what I’m doing right now.”

“Honestly? Me too.” You whisper, you feel your heart beginning to race as you and Jungkook admit that if it were your last day, you would spend it together. Somehow the thought almost seems romantic to you…that’s obviously your imagination but you can dream.

“What’s the last thing you do at night?”

Jungkook wiggles his brows at you and you hit his arm, laughing.

“Gross.” You giggle. “Something besides that.”

“What? You think it’s gross to mast—”

“Don’t!” you yell out laughing. “Don’t be gross.”

“Everyone does it y/n…I bet even you.” Jungkook voice goes low. “in fact, I have a question for you.” Jungkook scoots closer to you, “When was the last time you got yourself off?” your eyes go wide, “It’s not like you’re seeing anyone…unless you and Yoon—”

“No!” You begin to panic, “I’m not seeing anyone, you’re right.”

Jungkook releases a long breath and he smiles, “Thought so.” Then he’s scooting even closer to you.

“How do you touch yourself y/n?” He slurs out, “With your fingers only? Perhaps you use a vibrator?”

You push your head back in shock, there’s no way in hell Jungkook just asked you that? Is he drunk? Barely.

“Why do you want to know that?” you scoot a little closer to him too.

“Best friends know this type of stuff about each other all the time, don’t they?”

“Not really…but I’ll play. I use both.”

Jungkook raises a brow in amusement, he bites on his bottom lip as his smirks at you.

“You own a vibrator?” Jungkook chuckles darkly, “How come I didn’t know?”

“Why would I tell you that?”

“I bet Jimin knows.”

“Fine, he does.”

Jungkook narrows his eyes at you as he tries to hold in his slight laughter, his hand comes to his mouth and he chuckles into it.

“Thought so…when’s the last time you used it?”

“Last night before bed.”

“So, it’s the last thing you did at night?” Jungkook points his finger at you knowingly and you can’t help but laugh.

“Okay, I see where this is going. Fine, I get. We all masturbate. It’s completely normal and not gross and a totally valid answer for something you do before bed.” You throw your hands up as you giggle.

“Thank you.” Jungkook knees touch yours as he scoots just an inch closer, “But I wasn’t trying to make a point, I was genuinely curious about you.” He admits in a deep voice and you squeeze your thighs together, an action that does not go unnoticed by him. His eyes land to your lap and he chuckles. His voice is so low and inviting as he speaks, “Are you curious about me too?”

“What do you mean?”

“About when’s the last time I—”

“Fine, when’s the last time?” you ask lightly.

“Right before I came here.” He admits easily.

“Interesting.”

You and Jungkook stare at one another for what feels like at least an hour but in reality probably seconds. But his dark gaze is so raw and powerful, you find yourself leaning into his space.

“The last time I used my vibrator was yes, last night. But the last time I touched myself was tonight. Before you arrived.”

Jungkook nods his head in understanding, or maybe it’s approval? Either way he nods his head as a sly smile creeps on his lips.

“Can I ask you what you thought about?” Even Jungkook widens his eyes in surprise as he asks that. Where did that confidence come from? “Sorry that’s TMI.” He quickly rushes to say, not wanting to really hear your answer because he shouldn’t know what you fantasize about especially if he’s not in said fantasies.

You lean your head back and snicker. You wish you had the fucking courage to tell him the truth. Him. You thought about him.

In your fantasy his head was between your legs, licking you up and making you squirm. He would moan into your greedy cunt, basking in your juices. God, you can just picture it now. His mouth and nose covered in you, the shine on his face evidence of how well he’s eaten you. His fingers still buried inside you as he lifts his head up to smirk down at you, his hair a fucking mess from how much you have tugged on it.

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t thinking about it right now and getting so heavily turned on. Your chest heaves just a little more than usual, and there’s an ache between your legs that you wish Jungkook would soothe. Your fantasy of him going down on you? You took that straight from your memories.

“Not going to say anything?” Jungkook leans in a little closer.

“Sorry, just thinking.”

“About…?”

“You.”

Jungkook’s eyes expand as he processes what you just say until—

“Wait, wait. That came out wrong.” Your hands scramble to hold on to his shoulders. “I mean, I was thinking about you. But not like that.” You lie. Because you have to lie.

“Oh…right, that makes sense.” Jungkook visibly deflates at your confession.

“Anyway, yeah. That’s a TMI for sure.” You laugh awkwardly and Jungkook leans back away from you.

“For sure.” Jungkook leans back on the sofa, “So, what’s the next question?”

“Ever had a threesome?” you ask from your own brain.

“You already know I have.”

“With two girls or with another guy…?”

“Two girls.”

“Would you ever with another guy?”

“Maybe if it’s with a girl that doesn’t mean something to me…but if it’s with someone I care about, probably not. I think I may be too possessive. Don’t wanna share.”

“Ah, I see.”

“What about you?”

“I would do both.” You admit. “Sounds like fun…”

“It is fun,” Jungkook laughs, “But there’s something special about just being with one person, if it’s special…”

“Have you ever had sex with someone special?”

“Yes.”

Oh. Jungkook’s never been in a serious relationship since you’ve known him so you weren’t expecting him to answer that with a yes…but he is with Vanessa now. So obviously…

“I see.”

“What’s the next question?”

“I’m looking up a new list. It’s kind of sexy, is that okay?”

“A list of dirty questions? I’m down.” Jungkook smirks and you feel the heat between your legs grow.

“Okay the first one is asking if you’re a virgin and I think the whole town knows the answer to that…”

“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?!”

You laugh out, “Nothing, nothing.” Then continue scrolling, “Okay, opinion on shower sex?”

“Hmm, I’ve done, and I will do it again.”

“For me, it’s a little uncomfortable but I’ll do it,” you say, “boob or butt guy?”

“Fuck. Both of them, can I say both?” Jungkook pleads and you giggle.

“Sure, both.” Your eyes light up when you find the next question. “Oooh. What is your most embarrassing sex story?”

“Oh god…okay. When I was in high school I was getting head from this girl…”

“Uh huh…and then?”

“We got caught by our teacher and that’s a total mood killer right?”

“Right?”

“Well, when the teacher was scolding me I popped another boner. And I was wearing sweats so it was super obvious and she was trying so hard not to make it obvious. But I don’t know, my body betrayed me.”

“You got hard from getting scolded?”

“Apparently.”

You burst out into giggles, the story absolutely killing you. Who does that? Who pops a boner from getting scolded…by their fucking teacher?

“Your turn, your turn.”

“Okay…one time I was giving head…”

“Uh huh…and then?” he copies you.

“And I guess I swallowed his cum too fast because it shot out of my nose like milk.”

“What the fuck y/n.” Jungkook laughs out hysterically. “That’s so awesome.”

“It wasn’t awesome Jungkook, it was embarrassing.”

“Perspective.”

“In what world is someone’s perspective on this awesome?” “Mine.”

“Well, you’re fucking weird.

“Maybe so.” Jungkook continues to laugh, “What’s next?”

“Do you prefer to give or receive?”

“Who doesn’t love to receive? That’s obvious. But me? I am a giver, 100%”

And he’s right. Hence why you’re able to use the memory of him going down on you as good masturbation material.

“I see.”

“I think I am a giver too.” You look down at your phone, “But who doesn’t love to receive?”

“You do give nicely.” Jungkook whispers, “Anyway what’s the next one?”

“Do you like sexting?”

“Fucking love it. I love the dirty words and pictures.” He admits.

“Yeah, me too.”

What would it be like to be texting Jungkook throughout the work day, sending one another your dirtiest fantasies and pictures to go along with it.

“I’ll read the next one now…If I came home from work stressed, how you do you relax me?” your eyes go wide when you realize, “Wait, pretends it’s asking about someone else. So a girl you’re with comes home from work stressed, how do you relax her?”

Jungkook is quiet for a few moments, he chews on his bottom lip and breathes out heavily.

“How would I relax you? I mean, some girl?”

“Y-Yes.”

“First, I would kiss you breathless.”

“You mean her.”

“Right. I would kiss her lips over and over, taking off one article of clothing at a time, sit her down on the couch while I make my way into the kitchen…pour her a glass of her favorite wine and hand it to her. Then I would kiss down her body, telling her sweet words. How much I love her, how much I missed her today, how much she means to me. I will kiss down until I am taking off her pants along with her underwear…” “And then?” you breathe out.

“Kiss her sweet, soft skin…taste her. Taste how fucking good she tastes. Eat her out while she sips on her wine…”

“Oh nice.” You laugh a little.

“Make her come all over my tongue, getting her drunk on her orgasm.”

“And her wine.” You point out.

“Yes, both. After she comes, I will kiss back up her body and hold her.” Jungkook releases short breath after the other. “Make her feel wanted.”

“That does sound relaxing…”

“You like?”

“Yes.”

“Then maybe—”

“Next question is ‘What turns you on almost instantly?”

“Dirty talk.”

“I see.”

“What—”

“You have to answer too, remember?”

“My stomach being touched.” You admit. “How do you feel about toys?”

“Not against them, could be fun to try out.”

“I agree…how do you feel about blindfolds?”

“You answer first.” Jungkook says shyly.

“I’m into it.”

“Being blinded? Or blinding someone?”

“Both? Yes, both.”

“Fuck, me too.” He folds his arms behind him as he leans back further into the sofa.

“Both for you too?”

“Yes. It would be boring if I was only into one thing right?”

You laugh, “Yes, I think we think similarly.”

“Interesting.”

“Very.” You smile at him and he smirks, “Would you like to watch me touch myself?”

“Yes—”

“—Wait, like your partner, not me.” You both say at the same time.

“Oh, well yes.” Jungkook says again. “Watching your fingers travel down to your pussy, rubbing your clit…well, not you but you get my point.” He says, his breathing becoming heavy again.

“Oh. I would also like to watch you.”

“But not me.”

“Exactly.”

“Spit or swallow?”

“I like a girl who swallows.”

“I like to swallow most times and if I don’t swallow it’s because I’m letting the guy come on my face or my tits or—”

“God damn it, y/n.” Jungkook breathes out erratically. His hand goes to his crotch as he tries to hide his growing member.

“Rough or sensual?”

“Fuck. Both, definitely both.”

“I agree. Why not both all the time?” you squeeze your thighs together again as you watch Jungkook shift uncomfortably in his seat on the couch.

“Would you let me pleasure you as you drive? I mean, your partner. Sorry it’s just the way the questions read…”

“Yes. I would.”

“Seems a bit unsafe…but I would give it a try.” You say, “Do you like your hair to be pulled?” you ask with a smirk, already knowing the answer.

“Fucking love it.” He admits between heavy breaths, “But I like to pull hair too.” He winks.

“I do too, but I prefer being the one pulling.” You wink back. “Are you quiet during sex?”

“I—I don’t know…Am I?” Jungkook looks into your eyes, and you blank. Is he actually referring to the time you two had sex? Without him getting weird? “You aren’t the quietest.” You admit, “But it’s so fucking hot.”

“Well, you definitely aren’t quiet.” He says, “Can barely touch you and you’re already whimpering out.”

“Depends who the guy is.”

“Well, when it’s with me…sorry, I shouldn’t bring that up.”

“Right…” your fingers find their way into Jungkook’s hair, “But why not?”

“y/n…” he warns and you chuckle.

“What?” you decide to play innocent. “It was so long ago, Jungkook. We should be able to talk about it by now.”

But Jungkook can’t. Because although it’s almost been 4 years, it’s still so fresh for him. Not just the feeling of being inside you but the emotional shit he was feeling too.

“I’ll tell you one thing and one thing only about that night,” Jungkook decides to say, his hand goes to yours and gently places it back in your lap. “It felt so fucking good.” He whispers out and you feel all the heat in your body rush to your aching pussy.

“Oh.” You breathe out erratically. “I guess, I would have to agree.”

“Should we sleep soon?” Jungkook leans back as he asks you this.

“Don’t you want me to share one thing about that night?”

“…Sure.”

“You…felt so…good…inside me…” you say between deep breaths.

“You felt even better, y/n.”

It’s Saturday morning, and you find yourself waking up on the couch, a big blanket draped around your body and you can’t help but snuggle into it, not wanting to get up quite yet.

On the other side of the couch is a still sleeping Jungkook, his light snores filling your ears. You two didn’t even finish your wine last night, so you are waking up hang over free. The sun is shining today, it’s rays peeking through your window blinds and you want to throw the blanket over your head to hide yourself from the brightness but you decide to actually wake up and get up instead.

You throw the blanket off your body and on to Jungkook, who gratefully takes it and cuddles deeper into the covers. You stand up and head towards the bathroom to wash up, turning on a hot shower.

You wonder what you’ll be up to today, will you stay in? Go out? Hang with the girls? By the way, did they ever come home last night? You stop by Holly’s room to find it empty. Interesting, you guess they went to Trina’s.

The shower is ready for you so you slip in and let the warm water cascade over your tired body. You shampoo, condition and wash your body, when you hear insistent knowing on the bathroom door.

“y/n!!! I gotta pee!!” Jungkook’s worried voice is heard over the running water, “That’s it, I’m coming in okay?!”

And before you can respond, you hear the door being swung open and Jungkook lifting the toilet seat lid up and releasing himself. You fucking laugh. He literally says ‘Aaahhh’ for the same amount of time he is peeing.

“Fucking finally, I thought I was going to piss myself.” He says when he’s finishing up.

“Sorry.” You reply lamely. “Shower felt too good to leave.”

“Well, hurry up so we can go get something to eat. I’m so hungry!”

“Okay, okay.” And with that, Jungkook is leaving the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

You finish washing up, stepping out of the shower and drying off. You quickly leave the bathroom in just your towel to head to your bedroom. Thankfully, Jungkook is on the couch watching some show on Netflix—too busy to notice your half naked state.

You get dressed in a rush, not wanting Jungkook to wait much longer for you. You settle for some jeans and a cute yellow shirt.

“I like yellow on you.” Jungkook says when he sees you. “Pretty.”

You are sure your cheeks are turning a nice shade of red at his compliment but you cover them with your hands to hide yourself.

“Thanks JK.”

#bts #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #jeon jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff

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everysongineverykey · 3 years

Text

I'M DONE. HERE. TAKE THESE CHAPTER 2 THOUGHTS AND RUN, BABY.

so i'll try to go in order here. uhhhh... there's a LOT i have to say. first: toriel giggling sprite my beloved

on that note, ALL THE NEW SUSIE SPRITES MY BELOVEDS

NOELLE YOU'RE SO GAY. I THINK THIS IS PROBABLY JUST BECAUSE I TOLD HER TO IN CHAPTER ONE BUT SHE GAVE SUSIE THE LUNCHBOX FULL OF CHALK!! I LOVE ITTTT

ralsei's, uh... kinda sus. the whole "recruiting" thing REALLY sketches me out. and he looks kinda... smug, all the time, like he knows what's going on.

LANCER JOINED! ROUXLS JOINED EVEN THOUGH NO ONE WANTED THAT! STARWALKER JOINED, TO EVERYONE'S JOY!

LIBRARY PORTALLLL

so before i entered the city there was that pre-city area? that looked very much like the city? except it had different music? and i thought they'd cut welcome to the city and i was SEVERELY disappointed. but then they didn't! just something i wanted to mention

NOELLE!!

throughout this game i went from despising berdly to feeling bad for him to not really liking him again, but not hating him as much as before. he'd better stay the fuck away from susie though

the queen is the best villain. she's the kind you love to hate! she's literally so funny AND her boss battle is actually tough (rip to the king but he just. wasn't a formidable enemy at all lol)

THE GANG CHARLIE BROWN DANCING TO WIN A FIGHT! SUSIE GAINING THE POWER TO ACT THROUGH SHEER FORCE OF WILL! SUSIE FORCING RALSEI TO LEARN TO ACT EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T WANT TO! THAT ENTIRE BATTLE WAS AMAZING! THE "BATTLE WON" END DANCING SEQUENCE! GOING INSANE GOING INSANE

the puzzles in this chapter were genuinely really impressive! i especially loved the word search puzzles and the ice-ee undertale word search reference💙

that being said. the mouse puzzles were SO fucking infuriating. i caused poor noelle a LOT of grief with those and i feel bad.

SPEAKING OF NOELLE!! the scene where she and kris are walking through the puzzle, the one that spells "december", and she's talking about when they were kids, how she loved sneaking out? beautiful. the cinnamon tography <3 also i guessed dess's full name was december a while ago and while i guess it was obvious, it's nice to have that confirmed!

also, i love that susie and ralsei are real friends in this chapter! he taught her a healing spell!!

ugh. fucking berdly. so smug and pretentious. i love queen's desire to be as far away from him as possible though

i also like his backstory. it gives his behavior, even if it's still annoying, at least some context. i get the feeling of feeling like if you're not smart, people will forget about you, and that's scary.

ALSO ALSO. GAMER BERDLY. LITERALLY EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT IS PERFECT. "I THOUGHT YOU WERE A GAMER!" "i only play mobile games, berdly." "NOOOOOO!" like i ADORE that

anyways. time for me to talk about the only thing that matters in this world: suselle. i mean, did the gays win in this chapter or DID THE GAYS WIN IN THIS CHAPTER?? THEY RODE A HEART-COVERED FERRIS WHEEL AND HAD A HEARTFELT, TENSION-FILLED CONVERSATION!

"did you ever wonder why the real susie never picked on you? well, maybe it's because... when you were both new to class, you lent her one of your pencils, like... maybe a dumb one with candy canes on it or something, and... even though it didn't actually taste like candy, she... remembered your smile." okay god thanks toby it's not like i needed my heart or anything

SERIOUSLY. TOBY "i'm gonna give the gays everything they want" FOX IS BACK WITH ANOTHER BANGER LADS

QUEEN'S BOSS BATTLE! ACTUALLY TOUGH, UNLIKE KING'S! AND GIGA QUEEN! I'M GOING INSANE THAT WAS SO SICK AND SO HARD

the way my heart BROKE when lancer turned to stone good god thank GOD our boy's okay

AND ROUXLS KAARD IN HIS PIRATE DUCK!! WITH HIS LITTLE HAT! DEMANDING THE QUEEN MAKE HIM BUTLER SUPREMETH! I LOVE HIM MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF

also!! kris and ralsei's little moment on the swan boat💙 i wasn't a kralsei shipper before but uh... that may be starting to change

it's hard because ralsei's still suspicious but at the same time i love him and want him to be happy. i don't know how to feel

also, if darkners outside of their dark worlds turn to stone after a while, why didn't ralsei? that's, uhhh... VERY sus. very weird. mr fox i need ANSWERS

WE FINALLY HAVE A WAY TO SAVE AFTER WE'VE FINISHED MOST OF THE EPILOGUE LADS. REJOICE!!

seriously the thing that peeved me about ch1 was that the last save point was on the battle stage and if i wanted to play the epilogue again, i had to. do that entire battle all over. BUT NOW THAT'S BEEN FIXED!!

UNDYNE AND ALPHYS HAVE MET UNDYNE AND ALPHYS HAVE MET THIS IS NOT A DRILL UNDYNE GAVE HER A BOX OF CANDIES EVERYBODY SHUT UP THEY'RE IN LOVE ALL IS RIGHT WITH THE WORLD

ALSO! NEAR THE BEGINNING! I FORGOT TO MENTION THE LITTLE WHITE DOG DOING DONUTS IN A TOY RACE CAR AND BACKING UP TRAFFIC! THANK YOU LITTLE WHITE DOG!

on that note: "looks like a car. this one has a man in it. he waves at you happily." AND THEN THE MAN'S GONE??? HEY TOBY???

ALSO. THE SEGMENT WHERE THE ANNOYING DOG HELPS US FIND THE KEY THROUGH THE POWER OF WANTON DESTRUCTION. THE BEST PLOT DEVICE!

TORIEL TEACHING SUSIE TO MAKE PIE STOP ITTTTT

and yes yes i KNOW kris slashed toriel's tires. that was extremely troubling. but THEY MADE PIE TOGETHER!!

"leave the chalk alone, kris" TORIEL!!

sans and toriel making egg puns and asgore running in and going "don't forget me, your eggs-husband!" is the FUNNIEST sitcom moment type thing ever. GOD.

on the other hand sans let me meet your brother god dammit i'll kill you

METTATONNNNNNN

RUDY... "who got you these flowers?" "is it weird for a married man to get flowers?" "so your wife did?" "oh, no! kris's dad did!" "...not even gonna try to understand this..." TOBY STOP ITTTT YOU'RE GIVING THE ASGORUDY SHIPPERS FALSE HOPE. YOU KNOW YOU'RE JUST GONNA KILL RUDY. YOU'RE JUST RUBBING SALT IN THE WOUND!

NUBERT! MY MAN!

seeing kris repeatedly they-themmed by multiple characters makes me so happy <3 poor kid... "college summer vacation when" "you opened the door with your eyes closed. you saw nothing" kris....

KRIS...

fucking. BLACK FOG STORM IN THE LIVING ROOM KRIS STOP IT. HOW'RE THEY GONNA REVEAL THIS WAS INNOCENT? THE KNIFE IN CHAPTER ONE WAS EASY BUT HOW WILL THEY EXPLAIN THIS

the staticy tv appearing in the dark and a toothy smile slowly fading into view in the center and lingering there ominously for far too long >>>>>>> every hollywood horror movie ever god. GOD

snowy and monster kid checking out the red door. implying there's something in there. something that kris knows about. knowing we won't get any more deltarune content for 5+ years does NOT fill me with determination

also. gaster's symbolic theme being mus_smile. and the final image in the game being a smile. god. gaster's COMING lads.

onionsan hears a song at night... a familiar song... memory, perhaps? or maybe a certain... four-note arpeggio that's hidden in a sound test room in undertale? who knows? guess we'll just have to wait for chapters 3/4/5.

this concludes my ramblings for now, but don't get it twisted- this is FAR from the last post i'll make about ch2. this whole chapter was absolutely amazing! brilliant! showstopping!! i'm genuinely soooo super impressed and excited for the chapter 3/4/5 bundle!!!

#deltarune spoilers #dr spoilers #deltarune chapter 2 #deltarune chapter 2 spoilers #dr chapter 2 spoilers #trying to get as many spoiler tags as possible!

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blueroan-equestrian · 4 years

Text

More to life 2

if you haven’t read ch. 1 hears a link

https://blueroan-equestrian.tumblr.com/post/623485137162829824/more-to-life

Ch2

It was getting cold, and it was last summer, a year and a half since I last saw Geralt. I had excepted that I’d never see him again. I was curled up in bed under my quilt. In the winter I often wake up throughout the night from either the cold or because I have to go. Tonight was no different except this time there’s a heavy arm laid across me. I froze but managed to turn around to breathe a sigh of relief. It was Geralt with only a cloak and underwear on, like a husband back from war. I still had to go so I made my way out, on return, I nearly trip over a man sleeping on the floor, “Shit.” I mumble but continue to bed as if that were normal. I crawled back into bed craving his touch again, I slip under his arm and as soon as I do it contracts around me. At first, I thought I had awakened him, but he gave off a snore and so I too, closed my eyes and went to sleep. When I woke I could hear someone shuffling around but with Geralt's arms around me, a man who I only able to spend a day with, I felt safe. I reluctantly opened my eyes, I lifted my head to look for the source of the scuffling. There was another tall and handsome man who was much lankier than Geralt. When he spotted me staring at him he smiled, “Good morning beautiful, I’m Jaskier. You must be Geralt's girl.”

I furrowed my brow, “Geralt's girl?”

His eyes widened like he accidentally revealed a secret, “I mean with the way he’s holding you and how he just got into bed with you with nothing more than his nickers and his cloak to cover him; I thought that maybe you were his girl.”

“Oh... where are his clothes anyway?”

“Hanging out to dry by the fire ... they needed to be cleaned and I had time. So can I make you breakfast?”

Though the introduction was odd, I decided it must be a normal thing for Geralt. So I nod, “Yes please... do you want help.”

“No I got it and I already watered and fed your animals, as well as collected all the eggs from the chicken coop.”

“Oh uh thank you... are you an early riser?”

“Yes, have to be to keep up with Geralt...” moves from the table to the fireplace and back.

Geralt's hold on me tightens, squishing me and I can feel his morning wood developing against my hips. “Geralt...” I whispered as I push back his hair.

“Geralt, wake up, you’re holding me too tight.”

He grunts but loosens his grip, pushing his head underneath mine and into my neck.

“That’s exactly why I thought you were his girl.” Jaskier chirped.

Geralt growled but held his position, something must have tired him out.

“Geralt? Are you ok?” I questioned. Smoothing his back this time with small circles of my small hand.

That’s when he popped up, he looked at me uncharacteristically wide-eyed, “my apologies (Y/N)... we were traveling for quite some time and well we were tired and there are no real inns that were open for us to stay in and well..”

“It’s alright Geralt and it’s perfectly natural... all men get them.” I tease causing Jaskier to burst into laughter. Geralt gave a grunt and I sat up and kissed his head before I hop up put on my apron dress and slip my shoes back on, and take a seat. Jaskier makes us plates but Geralt refuses to get up. “You want me to bring you your plate? You can eat in bed I know it’s cold and Jaskier has your clothes drying by the fire. Jaskier has been quite busy this morning and has kindly allowed us to sleep in.” Another grunt, “Geralt use your words.”

“Yes please...and thank you Jaskier.” He grumbled with a bit of bite to his words.

I picked up his plate and took it to him and returned to my seat. As we ate Jaskier and I talked, Garelt was quiet. “Geralt, I need to stop in town to sell my latest batch of soaps, do you need anything?”

“I’ll come with you.” Geralt grunts and moves quickly to put on his damp clothes but I stop him.

“If you insist on coming I can go collect some more kindle while we wait for your clothes to dry.”

“I have a spare pair now... in my bag. Just... give me a minute.”

Jaskier gathered the dishes, “I will clean up then I will need a nap.”

“Go for it.” I smiled gathering my basket full of soaps, oils, and some eggs. .........

Geralt picked me up like I weighed nothing and set me on his horse sideways before getting on himself and holding me close to him. When we arrived he hopped off, tied Roach to the post before coming back and helping me down. “Alright, where are you going to be? I want to pick something up real quick.” He asked setting a hand on my shoulder.

I looked up at him and smile, “I will be going around this row actually... do you want help finding what you need?”

He kisses my head like I did this morning with him, “No I will be fine, I just need a couple of things.”

He went off and so did I. I was about a third way through my round when he showed up with some tools. “What are those for?”

��I was thinking while Jaskier and I are here, we could build you a bedroom. Also, I picked up some more food for the week.” I give him an odd look but wasn’t going to refuse the labor. He places the food in the empty parts of my basket and followed me around till I decided I could be done for the day.

“Okay... I’m ready to go... do you want to grab lunch at the pub or would you prefer I make you something?” I asked.

“Hmm which would you prefer?” He asked back.

I gave him a cheeky smile, “Oh no I asked first!”

He smiled back, “Alright, I could use an ale... let’s go.”

He orders an ale and some meat and I water and some soup. While we wait he clears his throat, “While we have a moment to ourselves, I’d like to talk to you about what ... how you said there’s more to life...”

“So are you going to take back that you don’t know how to make friends because you have a little travel companion now?” I tease.

He rolls his eyes, “No... I... yes. You were right... having a friend is nice... can we be friends?”

I smile widely and practically sing, “Yes!”

He is a bit more talkative than last time. He tells me about what he does until he noticed the worried face I had on. He switched to talking about Roach and insisting that she missed me.

The week was hard but fun. Cramped in a small space with two men. Jaskier told me stories of their travels. They made a small bedroom within three days. Jaskier now sleeps in the main room and Geralt and I, to my own room. We even made Jaskier his own bed. One that can be rolled up easily. What like about it best is that it heavily hints at them coming back.

I laid in bed with Geralt's eyes closed as I carest the side of his face, “Geralt...” I whispered. “Hmmm”

“Do...” I hesitate and bite my lip. Did I want to risk knowing? Here I go... “Do you think you’ll ever love someone... or even marry?”

He opened his eyes to look at me, “I don’t know... I used to think friends were a waste of time but ever since I met you I don’t know what I want... before I met you I wouldn’t have considered it... now I guess it would be foolish for me to tell you no.”

I smile as I continue to run my hand through his hair. Before I can stop myself I am pulling him in for a deep, slow, and passionate kiss. The sound of his groan only eggs me on.

tags:

@ayamenimthiriel

ch 3 link

https://blueroan-equestrian.tumblr.com/post/623827984079552512/more-to-life-3

#geralt x reader #geralt imagine #geralt of rivia #witcher fanfiction #witcher

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plutoismydaddy · 4 years

Text

I can read you like a book 3

Jimin x reader Gangster au

In the midst of a gang war Jimin finds himself in his own war, a war between himself and the feelings he was developing for the girl with the fuzzy pink scarf.

CH1 CH2 CH3 CH4 CH5

-----------------------------------------

You dragged the rag across the table, granting the stains no mercy, with a sigh you stood up, your back aching in strain. Maybe laying on a roof for hours and then getting 3 hours of sleep wasn’t one of your greatest ideas. You walked into the kitchen and threw the rag in the dirty laundry bag, either way you had to get used to it.

Three weeks had passed, three weeks of surveilling the small building. You looked over to JM. After all this time it had become like a routine, JM laying beside you as you huddled together eyes not leaving the small building. As tiring and cold as it was you couldn’t hide the slight excitement when you thought about spending time with the man beside you.

Your head jerked up from where it was resting in your palm at the sight of a short hooded figure. It wasn’t the first time you had seen the person, shiny jewellery coating their body, it was hard to forget, but that was not the thing that made you so interested in them. No, it was the way the guards seemed to stiffen up as they approached the building, or how whenever they came, it seemed to be a more important meeting. There was something special about them. You elbowed JM and pointed toward the person “Do we know anything about them?” JM shook his head “no...no I don’t think so”. Eyes fixated on the hooded figure the two of you watched as they walked into the small house. “Let’s go.”, you turned to the man beside you, but his eyes were still fixated on the small building. “What?” JM shoved his bouncers into his bag “Let’s go, we both know we’re wasting our time”.

You followed the man as he crossed the roof, questions filling your head. Eyes hooded by his furrowed eyebrows and jaw clenched JM walked down the stair, walking beside him you couldn’t help but wonder what had made him so upset. He seemed fine a minute ago. Your eyes followed JM’s hands as they raked through his hair, his pale forehead peaking through, he sighed before turning to you, the corner of his lips rising slightly. Your stomach did a backflip at the attention, “where...where are we going?” you turned and stared forward “Let’s just drive around for a bit”. You only nodded in respond.

Music hummed through the quiet car as JM drove, the street lights glowed a yellow shine onto his face. Your eyes scanned over his relaxed face, his half lidded eyes and plum lips contrasted against the earlier furrowed eyebrows and cleaned jaw. “So, what happened earlier?” JM’s eyes flickered to you before they returned to the road “What?”. You chuckled at his sudden memory loss “You got all grumpy all of a sudden.”, JM’s shoulders tensed as he cleared his throat ”Ooh, I just got tired of laying on that roof I guess. You know we’ve been there for weeks without seen anything”. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, sure you hadn’t caught some big boss, but you had gathered small pieces here and there. You looked over at him, anyone would understand that things like this took time “Are- did one of the bosses speak to you. Did Shin say anything?”. JM’s grip tightened on the wheel as he took a deep breath, “Let’s not talk about work now”, “What else would we talk about?” you cocked your eyebrow at him. “It’s not like we’re some colleges in an office” JM chuckled “yeah you’re right, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get to know each other.” his lips curled into a small smile as he glanced towards you.

There he goes, changing his mood in a second “I already know your name, so it’s only fair if I told you mine. I’m Park Jimin.”, butterflies filled your stomach at the introduction. There was something intimate about knowing his first name, it was like JM was a mask that had now fallen to finally let you see Jimin, the real Jimin. Realizing your lack of response you gave him a smile “Nice to meet you.”, he mirrored your smile. “So why did you start working for the gangs?”. You tried your best to not show the slight discomfort that had filled your stomach at the question, you let out an awkward attempt at a chuckle “I had to pay off some family debt”. “By jumping into the world of crime instead of getting a job at a cafe or something” Jimin laughed, and you followed suit “The pay is better, I got more money talking to some crack heads in a week than serving people for a month”. Jimin only laughed more at your reasoning “Well why did you join? Did your mother abandon you as a child and you had to fend for yourself, and you are now looking for revenge!” you finished your dramatic speech with a sigh before the two of you burst out in laughter again. Jimin leaned forward as he laughed his warm hand grazing against your thigh as he grabbed your seat, the two of you gasped for air once you calmed down. “Naah Namjoon threatened to tell my mother that I had sex if I didn’t join his gang”. Silence filled the air as the two of you blinked at each other before you burst into laughter “And you called me dumb” you gasped out “I was in 9th grade” Jimin wheezed back.

The car had stood in front of your apartment for a while, already going over the allowed parking time, but the two of you didn’t stop talking. Jimin threw his head back in laughter at your little story, you could spend a lifetime watching the man in front of you, but you knew you had to go home and get some rest. Watching the sun’s first rays peek over the horizon you listened to Jmin’s laughter quiet down to chuckles “I should go home.”, Jimin followed your gaze “Yeah, I guess it’s late.”. Despite the words, neither of you moved from your spot the silence wrapping itself around you like a warm blanket. Letting out a sigh you sat up straight in your seat “Thanks for the drive it was lovely” you resisted smiling as you watched Jimin frown in slight disappointment. “It’s nice, you got some hilarious stories” he let out a chuckle “Well I’ll see you tomorrow, same place, same time.”, you opened the car door, the cold air biting against your skin “Yeah...no” you blinked at him “We should, I don’t know, change our tactics”. “What, why?” you froze, the car door hanging open “We’ve already identified like 5 members of the gang just by watching from that roof.” Jimin paused, his gaze seemed to shift into a slight glare as he crossed his arms and leaned back in his seat. “I just think we could do this more efficiently.”, “well this is wo-” your voice died into silence as Jimin leaned forward his voice low. “Come to one Soomin”, hearing your name fall from his lips seemed to squeeze something inside of you “Let’s just try a new plan, if it doesn’t work then we’ll just go back to the dumb rooftop shit.”. His nose grazed against yours as he breathed, you had never done any drug, but you were sure this was what being high felt like. “What do you think, hmm?” Jimin’s question pulled you out of the maze that was his eyes and back into reality “I, uh I mean yeah we could try...we could try,”. A smile grew on his lips.

Your body was heavy as you reached over to turn off the alarm, with a groan you laid back in your bed. You didn’t have work today as the cafe was going through some renovation, you weren’t complaining, body heavy with exhaustion you weren’t sure could have worked anyways. You rolled over onto your side, you had spent the night thinking, well trying to. There was something off with Jimin, you knew it, but every time you tried to figure it out in your head, your thought wandered back to how close he was, how his eyes had flickered from your lips back to your eyes and how low his voice was as if he only wanted you to hear him. And just like the night before you buried your face into the pillow, and kicked your feet against the soft mattress under you. That man was going to drive you crazy. There was definitely something going on. You sat up and swung your legs over the edge the cold floor attacking against your bare feet, you had to go back to that roof a last time, but with no car and Jimin definitely not an option you were stuck. Scrolling through your contacts, you tried to think of a good excuse as to why you would need to be dropped off at the outskirts of the city. Your eyebrows twitched upwards as your eyes fell on a certain name, Seokjin.

“So why did you call me? I don’t mind, of course, I just thought JM was supposed to be your partner.” you bit your lip, you wanted to tell him about Jimin’s weird behaviour, but they were in the same gang after all, and probably trusted each other more. “Yeah, but he seemed a bit tired yesterday, so I thought I’d go alone this time.” you shrugged. Seokjin nodded slightly as he furrowed his eyebrows in thought “yeah, he seemed a bit stressed yesterday” you raised your eyebrows as you eyed Seokjin “Oh?” Seokjin appeared clueless to your sudden interest as he let out a small chuckle turning on his turn signal. “Usually, that guy is the chillest person ever, we could be walking through rival territory, and he’d be scrolling through Instagram or something.”. You let out a chuckle as you leaned back in your seat, thoughts running again “I guess he must have been really tired, huh?”

“Where do you want me to park?” you scanned the area “How about there?” you pointed to a building a bit further to where Jimin used to park. You undid your seatbelt as the car stopped “It’s freezing, and I won’t take long, so you could stay in the car” you smiled at the man beside you, you weren’t going to force him into the cold also you only came for one person. “Ahh thank you, I hate the cold” he sighed as he pulled his coat closer when the cold night air filled the car.

Clutching your bag to your chest you kept close to dark walls as you walked, you approached the now so familiar building. Looking around before running towards it you force, there behind a small shed stood a slick black car, the same black slick car as Jimin drove. Same registration plate and all. But Jimin had made it very clear that he didn’t want to come back here though, eyes not leaving the car you pulled out your camera and snapped some photos of the vehicle. You never thought you’d use it against Jimin of all people. Turning your attention back to the reason you came here, you looked around the area again before running to the building, but instead of entering through the battered doors, you followed the cold walls. Once you were close to the edge of the building, you laid down on the ground and crawled the last bit. You were basically lying right in front of the Balck dove’s den shielded by nothing but the shade of the building beside you. Like a sniper on the battlefield, you laid there peering through your camera waiting for your target.

You don’t know how much time had passed, but the cold was starting to get to you. Thinking back to how you would press yourself against Jimin for the warmth you instinctively pressed yourself against the wall beside you, but you were only met with the cold concrete. The low buzzing in your phone pulled you from your thoughts, eyeing the guards a last time you moved slowly and pulled out your phone. Your stiff fingers worked the passcode into the phone to unlock it, One unread message from Jimin stared back at you. Eyes flickering to the building in front of you and seeing nothing had changed, you pressed on the notification. Hey, I might be a little late tonight, I’ll pick you up when I’m done <3. You stared at the screen anger slowly bubbling in your stomach. What the fuck are you doing Jimin? You shoved your phone back in your pocket, you didn’t have time for his bullshit; they should be here any moment now.

The quiet sound of the shutter filled our ears as the short figure walked in front of you, like a model on the catwalk they walked with confidence. As usual, the jewellery hugging their body shimmered in the light, a golden chain wrapped itself around their waist showing off their curves, and the golden coated heels and buckles on their shoes made their every step shine. You had seen these ornaments so many times, but this time you could get a good look at them, and some even better pictures. Your eyes followed the figure as they walked through the doors. Like a sniper laying on the battlefield, you located your target.

You plopped onto the seat with a huff, the warm air of the car coating your body. “Welcome back. Did you find anything?” you smiled back at Seokjin “I got exactly what I needed”. With a smile, Seokjin started the car, filling the silence with conversation Seokjin headed towards the city, but the car slowly came to a stop before you could. Seokjin leaned forwards furrowing his head as he stared past you, “Isn’t… Isn’t that JM’s car?” you turned your head not sure if you should act surprised at the parked car. Deciding you were tired of all the lying and pretending you turned and stared back at the man beside you with a bored stare “yup”. Seokjin’s eyes returned to the car “But he said he was at home” his voice was low almost as if he was talking to himself. “Home?”, “yeah, I texted him to see how he was doing, and he said he was just resting at home” that’s it you thought, You had to talk to Seokjin. “Let’s talk as we drive, so he doesn’t see us”, with a nod he drove away.

#bts #btsjimin #jimin x reader #gangstr au #jimin gang au #bts gang au #gang au #jimin fanfic #bts fanfic

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antihero-writings · 4 years

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Survey for Ch2 of What They Want to Believe! (Varian fic)

Hello! I’ve never done something like this before, but I thought I’d try it out!

I’m working on chapter 2 of my Varian fic “What They Want to Believe” (I’ll put a link to the first chapter in the replies or a reblog!). The first part of it is a memory scene of when Varian and the Saporians erased the king and queen’s memories. But I’m super torn on how that part of the memory scene should/would go. This fic is supposed to be as accurate to canon as I can make it.

I’ve written three options for the first few pages so far, and am trying to figure out which of them would be most accurate, if any. And, regardless of what’s most accurate/if they’re all accurate, I’d just love to know which one people generally like the most and would like to see in the final version of the fic.

If you have a moment, I’d really appreciate if you could read through the three options and give me feedback on which one you think is most accurate, and/or which one like the most, and why. Or if you have a totally different idea for how this scene should/would go, or you think I should add something specific to any of these, please don’t hesitate to say so!

Please also feel free to give me any other feedback, like on what smaller lines or phrases you liked, or didn’t like, or if there’s a line of dialogue you don’t think is accurate to how a character talks, or if you have ideas for the parts that I put in […]. (But please always try to be as kind as you can) <3

I wrote them in the order that you see them. Before re-watching S3 E1 I forgot that erasing their memories was Varian’s idea, so that’s why the first one is how it is. I think it’s actually my favorite of the three, but I’m not sure it’s accurate, as they make it seem like making everyone forget was Varian’s idea and the Saporians springboarded off of it (hence why I started writing other versions). I might be able to add to it to make it more accurate if you guys like it the most, I’ll just have to finagle it more. The last version is the one I’ve worked on the most, as I think it’s the most accurate. But I think its concept is probably my least favorite XD

Please note that all three of them are rough drafts and will be added to and polished before the final draft. I even left some of my notes to myself or blanks it [ ]. I’m super unsure how their dialogue would go in the second two.

Also please note that any/all of them would have the level of internal monologue closer to what’s in the third one in the final draft. And they would all have that last scene where Varian says he needs to go back to his house, but as that scene doesn’t change I only put it in the last one.

I could probably put these in a google doc if you'd like to comment more thourougly on them, but I thought I'd start with just posting them to tumblr and seeing what people liked more generally.

Thank you for your time!!

OPTION 1:

“What did you do to them?!” Varian tried and failed to keep his voice calm, his eyes ping ponging from the king to the queen.

Frederic and Arianna’s countenances were unchanging, their eyes hazy. He waved his hand in front of their faces and their expressions stayed the same [make this more descriptive]. Varian turned and looked at each of the Saporians in turn.

The girl with the white hair and gravelly voice gave a dark laugh. “Oh didn’t you know? I’m their fairy godmother!” She pulled a wand from her pocket with a flourish and twirled around. “Though, I’ll admit, I may have gone a teensy bit overboard,” she said like that was something to be proud of.

Varian’s eyes widened. He rushed up to her, examining the wand. “That’s a Saporian wand of Oblivium! You erased their memories?!”

“Relax Varian.” Andrew leaned against the wall. “It’s better this way. For us…” he lowered his gaze, “and for you.” He stepped forward and walked around Varian. “You think the King and Queen would be happy to see the kid who tried to overthrow their kingdom running free? I’m gonna save you the brainpower on this one; uh”—he leaned forward and poked Varian’s nose—“no, they wouldn’t. They’d throw you right back in jail, where you belong.”

“But…erasing their memories—” the alchemist jerked back to look at the vacant expressions of the once majesties. “I mean what if they can’t get them back?! What if—?”

Andrew gripped his arms, making Varian turn back to him. “Trust me, making them forget is the only way to accomplish our goals.” he lowered his head and voice, “The only way to fix what you’ve done.”

Varian bit his lip, glancing between them. [add internal monologue]

“But I…”

Andrew leaned back and folded his arms. “You don’t want to go back to prison, do you?”

“No! no! I just—!”

“Good.” Andrew began walking away with the other Saporians. Varian was about to follow them, when the king and queen stirred.

The alchemist froze, his eyes ticking up to the them, then to the Saporians, who were now all hidden in the wings, safe from view.

“Tell them you’re their most trusted advisor!” Clementine shout-whispered. The other Saporian’s sniggered like schoolchildren.

Varian turned again to the king and queen, who were opening their eyes.

He didn’t want to do this. It wasn’t his fault. [add more]

“Who…are you?” Frederic’s voice was distant.

Varian looked up at them, his eyes softening. They didn’t remember who he was. That had its benefits, to be sure. Still, he couldn’t help but feel bad, seeing his king and queen, Rapunzel’s parents, like this, so helpless. He cleared his throat.

“I-I’m Varian…your majesty.” He stepped closer. “You…really don’t remember me?”

He stirred, as if trying to dislodged the memory, then stilled. “I’m afraid not, young man.”

“‘Your most trusted advisor!’” Andrew mouthed.

The alchemist sighed. “I-I’m your most trusted advisor.”

Frederic stirred again, as if in a trance. “Yes…Varian…my most trusted…advisor…”

OPTION 2:

“Are you sure you can erase their memories?” Varian breathed.

The alchemist stared from the wing at the king and queen on their thrones, his heart hammering in his chest. What if they saw them? What if the spell didn’t work? What if they stopped them? Then their whole operation was over, he’d get thrown back in jail…

There was currently a long line of people preparing to make their requests to the king. If they failed, their whole plan fall apart, and everyone would see it crumble.

“Don’t tell me your wussing out on us now,” Andrew groaned.

“No, no! I’m just…I’m a scientist, its only natural that I’m skeptical.”

“You told me you were going to analyze that mineral. Our whole plan is kinda based on it.”

“Yeah but still, erasing people’s memories…”

“Relax, science boy,” Clementine stepped in front of him, walking backwards, “let ol’ [a name for her wand] here do the talking.”

She walked backwards into the throne room, then turned and marched straight up to the king and queen. Andrew put his hand over Varian’s mouth to keep him quiet, and against the wall.

Frederic looked perplexed by this visitor, and slightly affronted. “Excuse me, mam,” Frederic cleared his throat, “But I’m afraid you’re going to have to wait in line like the rest of these good people.”

“Oh, I don’t think so. No, you’ll be glad I didn’t wait, after you hear what I have to say.” She pulled out her wand.

“…What you have to say may be very pressing,” his eyes darted from her face to the wand, “but these good people have been waiting for a very long time, and have equally important requests. You must honor their—”

She rolled her eyes and flicked the wand. The gem at the base started to vibrate, pink smoke swirling in the air—the crowd was starting to mumble with unease, shout in warning and fear—then there was a flash of pink light.

Varian resisted against Andrew’s grip to get a better look at what was going on.

The king and queen blinked, and collapsed in their chairs. The crowd started to scream and run around through the haze, run for the doors.

Andrew let go of Varian and walked out into the room.

“People of Corona!” he bellowed, and people quieted. His cronies moved from the wings to support him. “There’s been a new edict! From now on this land shall be called New Saporia!” They all raised their weapons. “You will henceforth obey our orders!” [add more]

The screaming restarted, this time peppered with spitting and protest. [add more]

Varian looked at Andrew.

He wasn’t sure he wanted to do this anymore. [add more]

The king and queen stirred, then opened their eyes.

“Wh-What’s going on?” Frederic looked around, horrorstruck at all the screaming people. “What is this place? Where am I?” he paused blinked again, “Who am I?”

“Your majesties,” Clementine said with a certain mocking air, bowing low, “I am afraid to say you have suffered a recent incident that has cost you your memories.

“Nevertheless, Clementine here will explain everything. You are the king and queen of a quaint little kingdom called New Saporia. We are here to […]. The people of your kingdom are […] and we must ask you to stop all […] until we can get enough […]. These people just […]”

[“Funny, you’d think I’d remember ruling a kingdom,” Frederic chuckled at his wife.

Andrew stepped forward, putting his arm around Clementine. “Ehh, the memory can do funny things sometimes. Anyways], we are here to […]. Your kingdom [something about the minerals—you need to issue an order]. Your most trusted advisor...” he paused, glancing at Varian. When Varian didn’t come out he cleared his throat, loudly and fakely. “I said,” he enunciated like he was speaking to a five-year-old, “your most trusted advisor.”

Varian stepped back, a shadow coming across his face, his breath tempered.

He didn’t want to go out there. Yeah, he just had that epiphany. He didn’t want to do this. This wasn’t right. They shouldn’t—

Kai walked up and pulled him, stumbling into the room.

When he regained his balance he found said room was staring at him.

Some people were silently staring, others started to mumble to each other: “Isn’t that Varian?” “Yeah, the kid who kidnapped the queen!” “He’s a traitor!” [add more]

“R-Right!” he tried to ignore their mutterings and pushed his too-long hair out of his eyes, “Yes! I’m Varian, y-your majesties.” He bowed. “And… You see the people of Corona have been […] and […].”

“Your majesties,” he said darkly. “That’s right. My name is Varian, and I’m […]”

OPTION 3:

“Are you sure you can erase their memories?” Varian breathed.

The alchemist stared at the king and queen on their thrones from the wing, his heart hammering in his chest.

“Don’t tell me your chickening out on us now,” Andrew groaned.

“No, no! It’s just—I’m a man of science…I-I’m skeptical by nature.” Varian bit his lip.

“You told me you were gonna analyze that mineral.” He folded his arms over his chest, “We kinda based our whole plan on it, you know.”

“Yeah, I know, I know, but still, erasing people’s memories…”

“Relax alchemy boy,” Clementine stepped in front of him, walking backwards, “let ol’ [a name for her wand]—” apparently that was her name for her wand…and not a good one—“here do the talking.”

She walked backwards into the throne room, then turned and marched straight up to the king and queen, holding the wand behind her back.

Frederic offered a very confused look, considering he didn’t recognize her, but spoke kindly all the same, “Excuse me, mam,” he cleared his throat, “But the time to make your requests has passed…I’m afraid you’re going to have to wait until tomorrow to—”

“Oh, I don’t think there’ll be any need for waiting after you hear what I have to say.”

He looked indignant at the fact that she had just interrupted him, but continued in the same genial tone, if a little sterner. “…I understand what you have to say may be very important, but you must—”

Clementine flourished out her wand, and the gem at the bottom of the wand vibrated, pink sparks flying off of it, pink smoke circling it ominously.

Varian stretched to get a better look.

“What’s going on?!” Frederic barked from the haze.

Its power burst across the room in a sphere. Varian shut his eyes against the blast, before looking up at Andrew, who gave him a smug, what-did-I-tell-you? look.

When he turned back, Clementine had seemingly materialized back in the wing. “You’re up, kid.”

“Wh-Me? Why me?”

“You’re the one who wanted to erase their memories aren’t you?” Andrew sneered.

“Yeah, I did but—”

“Then what are you waiting for?” Andrew shoved Varian into the room.

He stared incredulously at him from the room. “How do we know it even worked?”

Andrew made a go on motion.

As the pink mist cleared, the king and queen stirred, their brows furrowed, and opened their eyes.

They looked around the room, confusion lining their gazes.

“Wh-What’s going on?” Frederic looked around. “What is this place? Where am I?” he paused, blinked, “Who am I?”

Varian’s eyes widened.

So it had worked, after all. They weren’t crazy. That was…unexpected.

He’d love to figure out how it worked, but that was a question for later.

He looked up at the king and queen, whose eyes were unknowing and as they fell upon him.

They no longer knew who he was, or what he did, the fact that he had kidnapped the queen and tried to kill their daughter, nor that they had put him in prison for it all.

….or who they were, for that matter.

“Excuse me, young man, could you tell us what’s going on?” Frederic looked from him to the room, to his wife.

They weren’t going to throw him back in that dungeon. They weren’t going to scold him, or else try to save his soul. They didn’t even suspect something sinister was going on. It was freeing; he was untouchable. As long as the king and queen didn’t know who he was, no one else could throw him back in jail, right? He could start anew…

This was unsettling. Seeing his king and queen, no, Rapunzel’s parents like this made him feel guilty. Wasn’t he just committing more treason? A crime for a crime. They always say two wrongs don’t make a right. Even without taking the treason into account, he had already hurt these people enough a year previously. Ripping them apart just to put his own family back together. It didn’t have to be this way…did it?

Varian cleared his throat. “Your majesties. I’m afraid you’ve suffered a recent incident which has cost you your memories,” he walked in front of the throne. “You are King Frederic and Queen Arianna of—”

—Andrew waved vigorously at him to get his attention, and pointed emphatically at the medallion on his chest bearing the Saporian logo. Varian sighed.

—“New Saporia.

“My name is Varian and I am…your most trusted advisor.” He paused for a moment. They didn’t even question it. He continued, “You rule with kindness and fairness, and treat every citizen with respect and dignity.” He bit his lip and looked away, thinking of his own punishment, his own unkindness. “But you see, the people…they too are in dire straights. I think I may have found a mineral which can save your people, and return you your memories. I just need to analyze it. It resides in […] once I do analyze it I suggest that you stop all [trade/commerce/…] and gather/call everyone to mine it, until we have enough to solve the situation.” [this might change a lot]

The king looked at the queen, and for a second Varian feared they were only playing along until now, that he’d bellow for the guards to grab him and to send him back to prison.

“If it’s for the good of the people…I suppose I will…make a decree! That’s what kings do, right? I will make a decree right away.”

“…Thank you,” Varian bowed, folding his arms and walking back.

On his way back to the wing, memories floated up, pieced themselves together, and pierced through his brain.

“What?How?! How can I trust anything when my own father just lied to the king’s face!”

Varian grimaced at the memory.

What would Quirin think of him now? Varian had been appalled to know his own father would lie to the king back then…but what would Quirin think if he knew what Varian had done to the king? Last year, and now? Even if he’d lie—(which Varian had come to understand wasn’t actually a lie, but a code)—Quirin would never do anything like this. He’d never use science and magic on his king and queen just to get what he wanted. He’d never release monsters and automatons on the citizens. No, he’d help people. He’d admit where he was wrong and…He wouldn’t run. He’d try to fix what he’d broken…or better yet not break it in the first place.

“A little stale on the delivery but I give you a solid five.” Clementine commented as he returned.

“I give him ten outta ten” Kai said with his hands over his heart, looking up with tears in his eyes, “His performance was from the heart.”

“That all the proof you needed?” Andrew demanded, folding his arms. “You said you could synthesize the memory formula into a serum.”

“Yeah, I did, but…” Varian looked away.

Andrew folded his arms. “…What?”

“Well…in order to know what exactly we’re dealing with, and to actually make the serum…I kinda need my lab equipment.”

“They don’t have lab equipment here?”

“…Not unless you count cooking pans and […]”

Andrew groaned. “So we need to go all the way to your house in the boonies just to grab a couple of your stupid little science tools?”

Varian winced. “…Yees?” He paused. “I can go by myself—”

“I’m no [something that’s not a job—it’s basically “I’m no doctor” but he’s making up a word] but I don’t think someone of your…uhh…stature can carry a whole serum’s worth of lab equipment all the way from your house to the castle. I’ll go get a horse.” He waved him off, “Clementine, you keep an eye on the king and queen, fill them in on anything else they need to know, and make sure they don’t wander off.”

“With pleasure!” she said in a way that made Varian not want to hear the list of things she found pleasurable.

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spiritedquill · 5 years

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Sonny’s Home For Boys: Chapter 1

Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Ch5 | Ch6 | Ch7 | Ch8 | Ch9 | Ch10 |

AO3 | FFnet

Summary: He wasn't staying. There was no way he could stay, he had to get back to Sammy. His dad would come back and he'd go back to doing what he did best: hunting. Still... the mysterious blue-eyed boy named Castiel made it really hard to not want to stick around and never go anywhere else again.

Notes: I wrote this RP with @gggghik forever ago and finally decided to turn it into a fic. Enjoy!! Comments encourage me to keep posting new chapters ;)

Chapter 1:

“Dean, I’m hungry.”

The words echoed through Dean’s mind as he walked through the little convenience store, taking long deep breaths and trying to act normal. He saw the shelf with cans of ravioli and smiled a little. Sammy loved the mini ravioli. Almost as much as he loved mac and cheese.

Dean looked around, trying to keep his breathing even. There weren’t any cameras that he could see and there was just the one cashier. He could do this.

He grabbed two cans of mini ravioli and stuffed them into his jacket. After closing his eyes for a second to steel his nerves, he started walking as casually as he could towards the exit.

“Hey, can I help you, boy?”

Dean startled and glanced over at the cashier. He froze for a second then shook his head with a smile. “Uh, no thank you. I was just leaving.”

The cashier gave him an odd look and Dean swallowed thickly but kept walking. He saw the cashier wave over the cop standing by the door and his stomach dropped. How had he not seen him there before?

“He didn’t buy anything… yeah, he was just wandering around…”

Dean heard the cashier whispering to the cop and his heart pounded harder in his chest. Don’t panic, Winchester. Just act natural.

“Hey there, son, why the hurry?”

Shit.

Dean turned to see a man in a deputy’s uniform standing over him. He gulped nervously. “Uh, sorry sir. I was just, uh…” he trailed off, panic setting in, and turned and broke into a sprint out the door.

“Hey stop that kid!”

Dean glanced back over his shoulder to see the deputy running after him, but he kept running…

...right into the other deputy.

Dean lost his balance a bit, dropping the ravioli cans from his jacket, and the deputy shook his head. “Turn around, kid,” he said, pulling out a pair of handcuffs. Dean panicked. He couldn’t get caught. On instinct, he threw a punch at the deputy and tried to run again, but the other officer was there to catch him by the arm.

“Not so fast.”

Dean cursed under his breath as his hands were cuffed behind his back and he was ushered into the back of the deputy’s car.

As they drove away, Dean could only think of Sam, and how he had failed him.

…

“Mr. Winchester, hi. We caught your son shoplifting, thanks for coming--”

“What happened?” John asked, looking over at Dean, disappointment in his eyes. Dean swallowed hard, but he couldn’t speak. He deserved that look. He’d been caught. That was one of the number one rules. Be smart, don’t get caught.

“Now listen, Dean punched one of my officers. That’s a big deal, it’ll have to go on his record. But the store owner isn’t pressing charges. Once I process him, he’s free to go if you could just sign a few papers--”

“No.”

“Sorry?”

“Dad--”

“No, he can sit for what he did. Give him some time to think. He’s your problem now.”

“Sir--”

The sheriff was interrupted by a door slamming shut, and John Winchester was gone. The man sighed. “Officers, take these cuffs off. I’ll call Sonny.” Grunting a bit in protest, the officer with the shiner on his eye, courtesy of Dean, unlocked the cuffs from Dean’s wrists. Dean winced a little as they came off, rubbing his sore wrists.

Dean couldn’t believe it. He had only stolen food for Sammy. He was trying to take care of his brother. It wasn’t his fault dad didn’t leave them enough food for a whole week. And he said he’d only be gone four days.

Shaking his head, trying not to think about that, he looked down and pretended he wasn’t eavesdropping as the sheriff spoke on the phone again.

“Yeah, Mr. Ellison, I’ve got a situation here… Yeah, do you have the space? No, not that, he was just here… I can’t believe it, he just left… Yeah, I’ll let him know... His name’s Dean. Thanks, Sonny. Bye, now.”

Dean’s face scrunched with a confused frown. Sonny? What the hell?

“Listen son, I know--”

“Don’t call me son,” Dean spat. “My dad’s coming back. He’s just pissed off, he’ll be back.” Dean wasn’t even sure he believed it, especially with that sad look the sheriff was giving him. He hated pity.

“I’m sure he will, but you can’t stay here in any case,” said the sheriff. “For now, we’ve got a nice boys home ‘round here where you can stay. A warm bed’s better than a jail cell.”

He had a point, Dean thought.

“Fine. I’ll be gone by tomorrow anyways when my dad comes back.”

“That’s alright by me, son.”

…

“Come on, Dean,” Sonny said, and Dean followed reluctantly. Sonny’s smile was so warm and kind. He couldn’t look at it. “Let’s get some frozen peas on those wrists and I’ll show ya to your room.”

“I-I get a room?” Dean stuttered out, stunned, without meaning to. Quickly collecting himself, he shrugged his shoulders and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He only winced a little when the leather rubbed his raw wrists. “I mean, yeah, uh, sure. I guess I can stick around for one night.”

Sonny smiled, amused, and glanced at him over his shoulder as he grabbed a bag of frozen peas. “You’re sixteen, right?”

Dean nodded silently.

“Oh, yeah,” Sonny said with a low chuckle. “I remember that age. Too cool for school, right?”

Dean shifted uncomfortably. He didn’t particularly like being psychoanalyzed. “I dunno what you’re talking about.”

Sonny smiled knowingly. “‘Course you don’t.” He handed Dean the bag of peas and clapped him lightly on the back. “You’ll fit right in here, Dean.”

Sonny led Dean upstairs, down the hall, and to the room at the end. There were six beds, 3 on each side of the room, with a rug in the middle. “The other boys are just finishing up their chores, but you can pick your bunk and settle in a bit.” Sonny paused and glanced at Dean, his heart clenching at the look on Dean’s face. He’d never had his own bed in his life by the looks of it. Clearing his throat, Sonny spoke again. “The first two on the right here are taken. Benny and Chuck. Ash has this first bunk on the left, and the far left corner is Castiel’s bunk. You can take your pick of the other two.”

Dean took it in for a moment longer before shaking himself out of his haze and tossing his jacket on the middle left bed. It’s not like it mattered anyways. “Thanks,” he muttered, and Sonny left the room to give him some space to adjust.

Dean looked around. The room wasn’t exactly huge, but it was surprisingly roomy considering 6 boys lived there. It was actually kinda nice, Dean thought. He even had his own night stand. He’d only ever had a bed to share with Sammy in dirty hotel rooms, so this was practically paradise.

Dean shook his head. No. He wasn’t staying. He couldn’t just leave Sam, and his dad would come back. Of course he would.

His chest hurt at the thought of Sam. Where was he now? Did dad drop him off at Bobby’s, or drag him along on a hunt? Did he even know what happened or why Dean wasn’t there? Or how his dad has basically told him “You’re on your own, rot in jail for all I care.” How all he wanted was to get some food for Sam but he didn’t have any money left. How he was abandoned for trying to be a good big brother.

He felt tears spill out of his eyes and he wiped them away roughly, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “Don’t cry, Winchester. Crying means you’re weak and you’re not weak,” he scolded himself just before the door flew open. He looked up as a lanky brown-haired boy ran into the room. The boy stopped in his tracks and looked at Dean.

“Oh,” he said after a moment. “You must be the new kid.” He went to his bed, on the right corner closest to the door, and grabbed an inhaler. “I’m Chuck,” the boy said after taking a deep draw of his inhaler. “We’re about to have lunch. Nice to meet you.”

Dean didn’t even have a chance to speak before Chuck was dashing out of the room again. Strange kid, he thought.

Dean wiped his hands down his face and shook out his shoulders before heading downstairs. He silently took a seat at the table with the other boys, not in the mood for more introductions. The others seemed to be fine with that-- except for one boy. He was about Dean’s age, with bright blue eyes, and he was staring right at Dean.

Dean’s temper flared. “What’s your problem?”

That got everyone’s attention.

“Well howdy, newbie,” said one of the boys. He looked about seventeen and he had an awful mullet.

“We haven’t had any fresh faces around here in quite some time,” said the boy next to Dean. He looked to be the same age as Mullet Man over there.

“Yeah, well don’t get used to it, cuz I’m not staying,” Dean snapped. “I’ll be gone before you know it so take a good look.”

Cocky. That’ll get old really quickly, Castiel thought. He looked away from Dean without a word and crossed his arms, scolding himself for so blatantly staring at Dean.

“So, what’re you in for? Oh, and I’m Benny by the way. And that dick head is Ash, you can ignore him.”

“Hey, I’m not--”

“And you already met Chuck here.” Chuck waved enthusiastically. “And Mr. Personality over there is Castiel.”

Castiel didn’t even look up at the sound of his name. Dean glanced at him curiously. This place was wack job central.

Dean looked back at Benny. “Well, I can see we’re all fantastic at first impressions.” He paused, trying to think of how to answer Benny’s question. “And well, I punched a cop. So that’ll do it.”

Cas tried to keep an eye roll at bay.

“Yeah, that would,” Benny laughed.

Benny stopped laughing and sat up a little straighter as a middle aged woman walked into the room carrying a tray of sandwiches and fruit.

“You boys been working hard?” she said with a smile just as warm as Sonny’s.

“Thank you, Ruth,” Castiel spoke up, barely audible to the rest of the room. He smiled thankfully at the women and Dean couldn’t help but notice he had a nice smile.

“Hello? Earth to Dean?” Ash said, waving a hand in front of Dean’s face and grabbing a sandwich before Ruth could even set the tray on the table. “Trust me, he’s not that interesting,” he said, and Dean’s eyes snapped away from Cas quickly. “He seems all mysterious and deep but you get past that pretty quick.”

Somehow, Dean doubted that was true.

As the boys ate, Dean couldn’t help but sneak glances at Castiel. He half-heartedly participated in conversation with Benny and Ash, but he was honestly more concerned with learning everything there was to learn about the quiet blue-eyed boy.

Cas finished eating before the other boys who were too busy talking to actually eat (except for Ash who was under the implication he could do both simultaneously). He stood stiffly and took his plate to the sink, wiping it clean and setting it to the side. Cas had noticed the new kid Dean staring at him throughout lunch. It was nothing he wasn’t used to. The other boys stared at him the same way. Intrigued, but not necessarily in a good way. There was almost always a hint of fear.

He never used to get those stares. But that was before.

He rubbed his hands down his shirt to smooth some of the wrinkles and walked past the other boys wordlessly. He did allow himself a moment to get a better look at Dean.

Green eyes, freckles, light brown hair that almost looked blonde in the sunlight, all wrapped up in flannel and blue jeans. And unfairly handsome. That was what Dean looked like.

Cas shook his head and left the kitchen, hurrying out the front door before he got carried away.

As he stepped out onto the porch, he bumped into a girl with dark hair and a guitar case slung over her shoulder. Castiel apologized and looked up at the familiar face, smiling a bit.

“Oh! Hey, Castiel,” the girl said, blushing.

“Hello, Robin,” Cas said with a nod and a polite smile.

Robin’s blush darkened when Cas said her name. Castiel’s heart sank in sympathy. He hated that every time she looked at him with those hopeful eyes he had to shoot her down. It wasn’t exactly his fault, he just wasn’t interested. “Uh, no thank you, Robin. We got a new kid today, though. He might want to,” Cas offered with as little pity as he could manage.

“Oh really?” Robin asked with a smile, trying to hide her disappointment. “Sounds awesome. I’ll, uh… I’ll see you around then, Cas.”

Cas nodded and waved to her as he hopped off the porch and headed off to the field behind the house.

Robin sighed sullenly, watching him go. She only took a moment to feel sorry for herself, though, quickly schooling her features and stepping through the front door. “Knock knock!” she announced cheerfully.

Dean looked up when the door opened, for a split second hoping it was Castiel. But he wasn’t disappointed by what he saw at all. His eyes widened when a very beautiful girl with a guitar entered walked through the door.

Ash scoffed. “That’s Robin,” he told Dean quietly. “She’s totally head-over-heels for Chatty Cassy but no one knows why. Don’t even bother, bro.”

Dean slapped on his trademark cocky grin, straightening his collar and standing up. “Watch and learn, boys.”

He sauntered into the living room with his best charming smile. “Hey,” he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “You know, I’ve always wanted to learn how to play guitar. Think you could teach me a few things?”

“That’s what I’m here for,” Robin said, unfazed by the blatant flirtation. She heard that shit all the time, but never from one person in particular.

She sighed and turned to the boy with a polite smile. “You must be the new kid Cas mentioned. I’m Robin,” she told him, shrugging the guitar off her shoulders and sitting on the couch.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, that’s me,” Dean said, taken aback slightly when she didn’t react to his flirting. “My name’s Dean.”

Sonny chose that moment to enter the living room, smiling when he saw Robin. “Hey there, Robin. Uh boys, have any of you seen Gordon?”

Dean frowned. The other boys shrugged and said they hadn’t seen him, and Sonny sighed and walked out the front door.

Sitting down next to Robin on the couch, Dean asked, “Who’s Gordon? I thought it was just the four boys.”

“Gordon is… well, it’s a long story,” Robin said, frowning. “He’s a jerk. Cas always tried to protect people when Gordon picked on them, so Gordon decided to target him instead. And Anna…” Robin trailed off, stopping herself. It wasn’t her place.

Dean felt an odd sense of protectiveness at the idea of someone bullying Castiel. He couldn’t quite place it. But he knew what it was like to be different, to be treated like a freak. He wouldn’t wish that on anyone. “Sounds to me like someone needs to teach Gordon a little common decency,” he told Robin fiercely, and she scoffed, pausing her strumming to look at him.

“What? And that’s gonna be you? Look, you’re right. Gordon needs to learn a lesson. But Castiel knocked him around pretty hard and he still didn’t learn it. You’d think with what Castiel did…” she stopped herself again, shaking her head. “Well, you’d think he’d learn to leave well enough alone.”

Outside, Castiel had wandered into the small patch of forest that sat behind the property. He looked up into one of the trees and smiled when he saw a small nest with three baby birds and their mother. He began climbing the tree, settling in with his back against the trunk a few branches below the nest. He watched them with a small smile, leaning back against the tree and enjoying the time alone.

“Hey, bird boy,” called a voice from below, and Cas stiffened. He looked down with disgust when he saw Gordon standing at the base of the tree. The older boy smirked and taunted, “Got your wings yet?”

Cas rolled his eyes and returned his attention to the birds. “Go away, Gordon,” he muttered.

“What was that now? Couldn’t hear ya.” Gordon’s eyes darkened and he hopped up onto the bottom branch, beginning to sway and put his entire weight into shaking the trunk. He smirked up at Cas as he struggled to keep his grip on the tree. He continued shaking the tree and taunting Cas. “Don’t feel like talking, huh? Fine by me.”

Castiel gritted his teeth, trying to cool his temper. He wanted to hop down there and shove Gordon’s face into the tree. It wouldn’t be hard. He wasn’t big, but he was stronger than Gordon for sure. But after what happened last time… Well, the thought was enough to cool Cas down pretty quick. He would just ride it out and Gordon would get bored eventually.

It wasn’t until he noticed the bird’s nest teetering on its branch that he finally moved. The mother bird had flown away the second Gordon began shaking the tree, but the nestlings were still there, and they couldn’t fly.

Cautiously, Castiel stood, steadying himself with a firm grip on the branches above him. He began to pull himself up, gasping and catching his grip when his foot slipped. Gordon began to shake the tree with even more fervor and the nest slipped. Castiel cursed and dove to catch it, falling to the ground with a thud. He groaned as the nestlings chirped in alarm, startled but safe and sound. Cas, on the other hand, was less than okay.

Gordon smiled smugly and hopped down from the tree, landing inches from Castiel’s head. Cas glared up at him. “Nice catch, bird boy,” Gordon sneered, then turned and shifed his expression into one of panic. “Hey!” he shouted. “Someone help! Cas is hurt!”

Dean was about to tell Robin that he didn’t care what Gordon did, he could take him. He’d seen worse. So much worse. Gordon didn’t scare him.

He was cut off when he heard yelling outside and he instinctively jumped up. He followed when Sonny and the other boys ran outside to see what was wrong.

Sonny ran through the open field, stopping to kneel next to Cas. “Hey, buddy, you all right? What happened?” The man didn’t believe Gordon’s concern for a second, nor did anyone else. They all knew him better than that. But Sonny was more focused on making sure Cas was okay than punishing Gordon.

Castiel groaned and began to sit up, and Sonny helped him. “The nest slipped,” he said, smiling weakly. “I caught it.”

Sonny chuckled. “What am I gonna do with you, boy?”

Dean followed the others outside, heart sinking when he saw Castiel on the ground. As he came closer to make sure the boy was okay, he noticed Gordon standing off to the side with a smug look on his face. Temper flaring, he marched out onto the grass and shoved the taller boy’s chest.

“So you like picking on people, huh?” he growled. “Maybe you should try picking on me, see how that works out for ya. Come on, do it,” he shoved Gordon again. “Do it! Unless you’re scared,” he challenged, eyeing Gordon fiercely.

Gordon laughed. “Fine, tough guy.”

Sonny stepped in the middle of them before Gordon could throw a fist. “Hey, knock it off, both of you. Gordon, get in the house, now! Dean, help me get Cas inside.”

Dean nodded, taking a breath to calm down but still glaring at Gordon.

Castiel tried to stand, looking at Dean with confusion. Why was he trying to protect him? He could take care of himself, anyways. But still, why would Dean even want to stick up for him?

Cradling the bird’s nest, Cas muttered, “I’m fine, I can take care of myself.”

Gordon laughed again. “Are you sure, bird boy? Your boyfriend here seems more than willing to swoop in. Looks like someone else stepped up as hero, Cassy.”

Castiel glared at Gordon and lifted himself up a bit. He still couldn’t stand.. Sonny ushered Gordon inside, and Dean walked over to Cas, watching him in concern. “Hey, you okay, man?” he asked. “Looks like you hit your head pretty hard…”

Castiel’s ego softened a bit at the boy’s concern. “I’m fine,” he insisted, but he winced as he sat up straighter, exposing the lie. “I have to get back up the tree. The birds…”

Dean reached out to help Castiel to his feet, not believing him for a second. “No way. You’re not climbing up there again after that fall. You need to rest up, Cas.”

“I don’t need rest, I need to get this nest back in the tree.”

Dean shook his head, eyeing Cas. “How ‘bout you let me put the nest back, and then we’ll grab you some ice. Lots of ice.”

Cas smiled a bit. “Are you sure? It’s the sixth branch up.”

Dean scoffed, grinning. “Honestly I’m offended you’d even ask.” Grabbing the nest carefully, he pulled himself up into the tree and started climbing higher and higher until he found what looked like the perfect place for the nest. Tucking it into the little nook, he smiled and climbed back down. “Done and done,” he said. “Oh, and I’m Dean, by the way. I wanted to introduce myself personally, instead of as ‘new kid.’” He smiled even wider and shook Castiel’s hand. “Mind if I call you Cas?”

Meanwhile, Robin continued to watch from the porch as the boys started heading back inside. She couldn’t help but admire the way Dean stood up for Castiel like that. And how he was being so kind to the boy. Honestly, it was extremely attractive. And Dean wasn’t exactly hard on the eyes either, so that helped.

Despite Castiel’s protests that he didn’t need help (which were discredited when he almost fell over before grabbing onto Dean’s shoulders), Dean wrapped an arm around the boy’s waist and helped him inside. After Dean got Cas inside in one piece, he went to the kitchen and grabbed a few bags of frozen peas. He figured Sonny wouldn’t mind. Then he helped Cas upstairs to the bathroom and found a first aid kit as Cas held the bags to his head and side.

“Sit,” he told Cas, and Cas listened, trying not to think too much about how Dean’s arm felt wrapped around his waist. Or how he looked when he smiled. Or his hair. Or the way his eyes lit up when he looked at him.

He hated himself every time his heart pounded just a little too fast.

Trying to distract himself from Dean’s face, he turned his attention to the amulet around Dean’s neck. “Nice amulet,” he said quietly as Dean cleaned up the blood coming from his forehead.

Dean paused, instinctively reaching for the necklace Sam gave him. “Oh,” he said, clearing his throat. Another reminder that he couldn’t protect Sam, no matter how hard he tried. “Yeah… it was a gift.” He frowned slightly, shaking his head to clear the thoughts of Sam.

“Cas, are you alright?”

Both of the boys jumped as Robin popped into the room, her blue eyes wide with concern.

“Uh, yes, I believe so,” Cas said.

“That was so sweet how you saved those birds,” she said, blushing. “Don’t let Gordon get to you.”

“I don’t,” Cas said gruffly.

Robin turned to look at Dean, then, and her blushed deepened. “It was sweet what you did, too…” she smiled shyly. “Standing up to Gordon like that.”

Dean shrugged, smiling just a bit, and Cas couldn’t help but watch him. Perhaps there was more to Dean than Cas had initially thought.

“It was nothing,” Dean said, snapping Cas out of his thoughts. Cas shook his head, kicking himself mentally. Stop staring. It isn’t right. “I just don’t like guys who pick on people just ‘cuz they can. I don’t care how much your life sucks, you can’t treat people like that.”

Fishing the anti-bacterial spray and some gauze out of the first aid kid, Dean knelt down in front of where Cas was sitting on the edge of the tub. “This might sting,” he told him, spraying the cuts across Castiel’s head, collarbone, and arms. Cas swallowed hard but showed no sign of pain. It was nothing he wasn’t used to.

Robin gently touched his knee, watching the boy carefully. “Castiel, you could always take him in a fight. You did before.”

Cas looked up at her and shook his head. “No. I… that’s not a good idea.” After what had happened before… Well, Cas couldn’t let that happen again. His father would… Cas closed his eyes. No. His dad had disowned him. What he thought shouldn’t matter. Besides, Castiel didn’t want to hurt anyone. Not again. Not even Gordon.

At the thought of his father, Castiel lost track of what was happening around him. He vaguely registered Dean and Robin talking softly to each other, but it didn’t matter. He couldn’t help but think of every lesson his dad had drilled into his mind… He was wrong. He was disgusting. He was a disgrace. And the way Dean’s hands felt against his skin only made matters worse. It was distracting.

His father didn’t understand. It wasn’t that he liked girls or that he liked boys. He had dated a few girls in the past, April and Meg. But it wasn’t their gender he was drawn to, it was their kindness and what he saw in their soul. According to his dad, it was far more important what was between a person’s legs.

Personally, Cas thought it was more “Christian” to love someone for more than just sex, but that’s not what his father had taught him. Man and woman. Anything else was a sin.

Castiel’s stomach churned. He believed in his heart that what he felt was real and that it wasn’t wrong, but he couldn’t help but think of his father’s words every time he noticed Dean’s eyes and the way he smiled… and the way he had so gently put those birds back in the tree…

No. Cas didn’t want to think about it. The thought made his skin crawl… or maybe it made him buzz. Either way, he decided right then that he would have to stay as far away from Dean Winchester as possible.

Breaking Cas out of his thoughts, Sonny came to stand in the doorway, asking how he was feeling. Gordon slipped in beside him and sneered at Cas.

“Got your boyfriend playing nurse, faggot? You kinky son of a--”

“Gordon,” Sonny stopped him, and Cas glared at the boy.

“That’s odd,” Cas growled, “considering your idea of kinky involves drunk 14 year old girls.”

“That’s enough,” Sonny said, louder, grabbing Gordon by the arm and leading him back to his room.

Dean frowned at Cas’s words. “What--”

“It doesn’t matter,” Cas muttered, looking down at the floor.

His frown deepening in concern, Dean began cleaning one of the deeper cuts on Cas’s cheek. He tried to meet the boy’s eyes. “I take it you have quite the history. What’d he do to make you hate him so much? You know, besides being a generally shitty person.”

Looking up from the floor, Cas eyed Dean curiously. He wasn’t fazed by Gordon’s harsh words or their implications. He was only worried about Cas. He really couldn’t figure Dean out.

Robin stood and cleared her throat. “Well, I hope you feel better, Cas. My dad will be waiting for me at the diner. I’ll tell Anna you said hi.”

Cas looked up at her and smiled. “Thank you, Robin.”

She blushed and smiled back at him, then coughed and turned to Dean. “Keep him out of trouble.”

Dean winked. “‘Course I will.”

“I am very capable of handling myself,” Cas said defensively, though he was secretly glad to have the light-hearted atmosphere return.

Robin rolled her eyes and gave him a knowing, affectionate smile. “Obviously. See ya, feel better.” Cas nodded and Robin left.

Once she was gone and it was just Cas and Dean, neither of them spoke for a few moments. Dean’s hand was frozen by Cas’s forehead where he had been patching him up. The touch was one they both tried to ignore.

“Gordon is part of the reason I’m in here,” Cas finally choked out, softly and hesitant.

“What do you mean by that?” Dean asked, leaning in close so he could see the wound better. Cas’s heart skipped a beat and he inched back just a bit.

“Why don’t you ask someone else? Everyone here knows the story,” he whispered, only a little bitter.

“Because I’m asking you,” Dean stated with a shrug. Pausing, he added, “I wanna get your side of the story, not some bullshit rumors.”

Grabbing the band-aids from the first aid kit, Dean finished patching Cas up, but he didn’t move away just yet.

Cas just shrugged. “Gordon’s an ass, and I was stupid. That’s really all there is to it.”

He was stupid for letting Anna go out on her own. Stupid for losing his temper so impulsively. Stupid for thinking his dad cared. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Dean chuckled, and Cas felt his breath catch at the sound. “You know, I can see why most people get the dark, mysterious vibe from you. You’re so… vague. I mean, it can’t be that bad. I’d bet you a hundred bucks I’ve done worse.”

Cas blushed when Dean called him ‘dark and mysterious.’ Was that really what people thought of him? Was that really what Dean thought of him? He decided not to dwell on the thought.

Dean noticed Cas seemed distracted. Or at least that he didn’t feel like talking. Dean understood that.

“Hey, I’m sorry for prying,” he back-tracked, clearing his throat and moving away from Cas just a little. “It’s your story to tell, and you don’t have to.”

“It’s alright,” Cas assured him, missing the closeness for a moment and then immediately dismissing that thought. “It’s not that I mind you knowing, I just don’t like talking about it. Like I said, everyone here knows the story. You can ask them. I’m sure you won’t hear it too differently.”

Cas was a terrible liar, he knew that. And he didn’t want to be the one to tell Dean that he had gotten drunk and done some stupid shit with Gordon, even if it wasn’t true. But that was the story everyone but a select few believed. It was better that way. If anyone found out what really happened… well, he didn’t know what would happen. But he had to keep Anna safe, even if that meant getting disowned by his family and being stuck in this place. As long as it wasn’t Anna going through it.

Dean nodded, not quite believing Cas but deciding not to push it too much. “Well, whatever it was, I wouldn’t think less of you for it. Anything that ends with Gordon getting his face kicked in is alright in my book.” Smiling, he finished putting one last band-aid on Cas’s forehead. “There. Good as new.” Then, smirking a little, he said, “You know, you look pretty badass for someone who just fell out of a tree. Might get some nice battle scars.”

Cas eyed him curiously. “I’m covered in band-aids. I’m not badass.”

Dean laughed, genuine and bright, and Cas felt his cheeks flush. “Well it’ll make you even more dark and mysterious, either way.”

Cas laughed too, then winced when he felt a sharp pain in his ribs. He made a pained noise and groaned, “I think I’m going to be dark and mysterious in my bed, if you don’t mind.” Cas protested but ultimately gave in when Dean rushed to help him stand and walk down the hall. “Uh, thanks,” he said. “For everything. And don’t worry about Gordon. He’s got me as a target and won’t let me go, which is good. It means he spends less time hurting anyone else. I can handle him.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you can,” Dean said with only a hint of sarcasm. “But it never hurts to have someone that’s got your back.” Dean led him to a door and reached for the knob but Cas stopped him.

“Wrong room,” he said quickly, grabbing Dean’s hand on instinct. “That’s Gordon’s room. Don’t go in there. Ever.”

Dean nodded, swallowing thickly as he felt warmth spread from where Cas touched him. “Good to know.” They continued walking to their room, and Dean helped Cas to his bed before sitting down on his own. “Get some rest,” he told Cas. “You’ve earned it, hero.”

Cas smiled at him, though he was both thrilled and panicked when he realized that Dean’s bed was right next to his. It was obvious he had formed some kind of attraction to Dean, and it needed to be quelled. But… Cas swallowed.

No, no, no, no, no.

Gritting his teeth to keep from groaning in pain, Cas gingerly hooked a thumb into the back of the neckline on his dirty t-shirt. He brought it over his head and tossed it into his laundry basket before replacing it with an old, loose-fitting black t-shirt.

He didn’t miss the way Dean stared at him for just a fraction of a second when he took his shirt off. He couldn’t help but feel… something when he saw the look on Dean’s face.

He laid down on his back, crossing his arms behind his head despite the soreness in his muscles. He stared at the ceiling as he spoke. “So, what stupid thing really got you stuck in here, Dean Winchester? I get the feeling it was more than punching a cop.”

Dean had busied himself with his pocket knife and the wooden bed posts, carving protective symbols into each one. He startled when Cas spoke, trying to pretend he wasn’t just distracting himself from the very distracting image of Cas with no shirt.

“I… I stole some food for me and my brother,” he said, clearing his throat when his voice came out barely more than a whisper.

Cas looked over at him, baffled. “Then it is stupid. That you were put in here, I mean. That’s no crime.”

His attention was drawn to what Dean was carving and he eyed the boy suspiciously.

Whoa, Novak, he thought. Way to have a thing for the devil worship boy. Dad would be so proud.

Dean smiled a little. “I agree.” Anything that was helping his brother couldn’t be bad, not in his eyes. Noticing the look on Cas’s face, Dean’s eyes widened. “Oh, no this isn’t… It’s just… It’s protection,” he tried to say, heart pounding. How could he explain this away? “It’s a… family thing. I guess. I swear I don’t worship the devil or anything like that. The exact opposite, actually.”

Cas blinked, slightly relieved. He pushed himself up into a sitting position, immediately regretting the quick movement, and carefully swung his legs over so he was facing Dean. He leaned in closer to get a better look at the carvings. “Huh,” he said. “These are… really intense anti-demonic Latin symbols. Where did you learn these?”

“My dad,” he answered, heart clenching at the reminder. “He’s… paranoid,” he lied. “I guess I’m a little paranoid, too.”

Cas wasn’t sure what to make of that, but before he could say anything, the other three boys walked into the room. Benny nodded at Cas.

“You doin’ alright there, chief?”

Cas nodded, his expression becoming more guarded when the other boys entered. Chuck flopped down on his bed, taking a draw of his inhaler. Benny and Ash grabbed some plastic straws and started shooting spit wads at each other from across the room.

Dean was disappointed when Cas closed off in the presence of the other boys, but he understood. Even as he mourned Cas’s open expression, he felt himself rebuilding his own walls.

As the two of them fell quiet again, Dean couldn’t help but wonder about Cas’s past with Gordon. Was it really that bad? Maybe he would ask one of the other boys after all. For now, though, he decided to try for some sleep. But between Benny arguing with Chuck over his fantasy romance supernatural novel (“Why would vampires kill for sport? That’s a waste of perfectly good food!”), and Cas humming softly to himself, and thoughts of Sam…

Well, he wasn’t gonna be getting any sleep tonight.

Snatching his jacket off the floor, Dean pulled out a small picture of him and his brother, curling up on his side and starting at the faded photograph. He frowned. What was he thinking, trying to make friends here? Obviously he couldn’t stay. He had to get back to his brother. He had to keep him safe, like always. It didn’t matter that his dad didn’t want him around anymore. All that mattered was that Sam was okay.

He had made his decision. He waited for the others to fall asleep and for the sun to set, then grabbed his jacket and started for the door.

Cas’s eyes snapped open when he heard the door open, looking over just in time to watch Dean slip out. He wanted to stop him… but no. This was a good thing. Cas’s feelings for Dean would only lead to more problems, so Cas let him go, as much as it hurt.

He tensed, however, when he heard another door open further down the hall, and Cas knew exactly where it was coming from. Cas cursed and slipped out of bed, heading down the stairs as quickly and quietly as he could.

Dean hadn’t thought it would be this easy to sneak out, but he wasn’t complaining. He slipped out the front door, hopping off the porch without looking back.

He didn’t hear the footsteps behind him until it was too late.

#destiel #destiel fic #dean winchester #castiel novak #destiel rp #sonny's home for boys

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starker-stories · 4 years

Text

An Accord (WIS), Chapter 3

I’ll be re-creating my individual chapter posts for An Accord over here on the blog that replaces starkerstories. Until I hit the current chapter, I’ll be posting daily. They’ll have links to both tumblr and AO3 chapter links. I’m sorry if that bothers people who’ve seen this all before in the tag. I’m content to leave all my other fic as AO3 only, but this is my current favorite child, so I’m spoiling it rotten.

Just because I suck and I can... @starker-stories the writer formerly known as ;) starkerstories. Here I am.

This fic is on a weekly update schedule. Hopefully every Friday. More chapters may appear sooner if the writing is going well. Because I have 0 self-control.

Tumblr Chapter Links: ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, ch5, ch6, ch7, ch8, ch9, ch10, ch11, ch12, ch13 AO3 Chapter Links: ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, ch5, ch6, ch7, ch8, ch9, ch10, ch11, ch12, ch13

Tags: Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Polyamory Negotiations, Polyamory, Cheating, Past Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Domestic Nightmare Tony Stark, Reconciliation, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, WinterIronSpider, Happy Ending, Clothed Sex, Domesticity, Peter Parker is legal age in the state of New York, College Student Peter Parker, Takes place about 2 years after Civil War. Closeted Character

Summary: “Russian naming convention. Natalia Romanova. Natasha Romanoff. Or Ms. Widow, to you kid.” Bucky grinned. “She’ll die when I tell her that.” ——————————————————————————————

Chapter 3: Colonel Flappy-coat

“You shouldn’t let me make you miss so much class,” Tony said, rolling over and nuzzling the spot behind Peter’s ear.

“You’re lucky I don’t take advantage of the fact that while we’re still not completely out about our relationship, every one of my professors knows that I’m Iron Man’s boyfriend. Because Tony fucking Stark told them as he signed the checks to fund their departments.”

Tony laughed. “What’s the point of being a billionaire if you can’t embarrass your boyfriend with it? As soon as you’re legal…”

“I’m legal now, Tony.”

“…in all fifty states, I will be more than happy to sing it from the roof of my tower that you are my beautiful boyfriend who puts up with far more from me than he should ever have to.”

“Do you think Bucky’s okay up at HQ?” Peter asked.

Tony brought out his phone and checked. “Company helicopter picked him up here, he flew himself there, he’s been in with Fury for almost three hours. So, no, he’s not okay. He’s been in a room with Nick Fury for three hours.”

“We should pick him up.”

“The helicopter’s there with him. We could take mine, though. Leave the other to self-pilot home.”

“I thought yours was the only one that could…” Peter rolled his eyes when he saw the way Tony was looking at him. “Can you not tinker with anything that comes within a thousand yards of you?” he asked rhetorically, giggling.

“Nope. Impossible. Didn’t you hear the story about how I upgraded a reporter’s phone just by glaring at it one day?”

“That was awesome. There’s evidence!”

“Of course there is. Who do you think ’shopped the evidence?”

“FRIDAY,” Peter said confidently. “You are the laziest computer genius in the world.”

“FRIDAY does things she can do; I do things she can’t. A more effective use of my time. Which leaves me more time to do this…”

“Not if we’re going to pick Bucky up from HQ,” Peter said, putting his hand up between them.

“Why am I doing that instead of fucking my beautiful boyfriend?”

“Because we’re rescuing him from Nick Fury.”

Tony sighed. “You had to go invoke that name and kill the mood. All right.”

~~~~~

“Do I have your attention, Sergeant Barnes?” Nick Fury asked, noticing Bucky staring out the window.

“No.”

“No?”

“No. The helicopter I flew here in just lifted off. Without a pilot.”

“You get used to that sort of thing when Stark’s around.”

“He’s not around though.”

“If his helicopter just took off, he will be. Now, about Korea… Would you mind not gawping at every technological wonder Stark pulls out of his ass? His ego doesn’t need the polish,” Fury said.

Bucky gawped at the larger helicopter landing, also pilotless. That time he saw Peter and Tony get out of the passenger area though. He smiled.

“I can see that we’re done for the day.”

“Sorry sir.”

“Go on,” Fury said disgusted at Bucky’s distraction.

“They think they’re fooling people,” he muttered under his breath as he stood, watching Tony and Peter head toward the main door.

“No,” Bucky said, smiling. “They just don’t give a fuck.”

~~~~~

“I’ll be back in a minute, baby,” Tony said, putting a kiss on Peter’s head when they met Bucky in the entrance.

“You look like you needed rescuing,” Peter said smiling. He took Bucky’s hand and held it briefly. “How are you holding up?”

“It’s fine. What I expected. More pleasant, actually.”

“With Nick Fury?” Peter said disbelieving.

“He’s professional. Calm. There’s an obvious agenda, but it’s obvious. He has a less obvious agenda naturally, but it’s obvious as well. I see why Tony insisted he handle my debrief.”

“Tony says Fury scares the shit out of him.”

Bucky chuckled. “You believe him?”

“Of course not,” Peter said. “But I let him think I do.” He paused. “I know the things that scare him.”

“I’m one of those things,” Bucky said.

Peter nodded. “He doesn’t want you to be though. I believe him on that.”

“Everyone here knows you’re together,” Bucky said, changing the subject.

“We’re not exactly subtle,” Peter giggled.

“I thought you were trying to keep your relationship quiet.”

“From the press. I’m still not legal age in a lot of states. If it got out of the small circle of people — Avengers, Tony’s personal staff, our friends and family — it… wouldn’t be great,” Peter said understating it. “When I turn eighteen, we’ll come completely out then. People will still talk and everyone will know that we started before. But there’ll be nothing that can be done about it.” He looked at Bucky sideways. “It doesn’t bother you? It bothers everyone. Even people who are our friends.”

“Peter, with my past… Is he hurting you? No. All right. Then he’s already a million miles above things that I have done to people younger than you.”

“Not you.”

Bucky sighed. “Maybe not, but my body did them.”

“Do you want to talk to someone about it?” Peter asked gently.

“Like a head shrinker?” Bucky scoffed. “What shrink is going to understand me?”

“Yeah. I get it. Hi. I can lift seventy tons and not break a sweat. I can literally feel my broken bones knitting back together. And I have trouble sleeping.”

Bucky laughed. “We’re not exactly couch material, any of us in this building, I don’t think.”

“This is true. There are some in the medical department here that try, but… even if they’re in on the whole secret identity thing, they just don’t know. And that’s just dealing with the superhero part. Not the whole… I was a secret assassin whose brain got regularly put into a blender for seventy years. Oh! I probably shouldn’t have said that.”

“No,” Bucky said, trying to keep from laughing so hard. “You should’ve. You definitely should’ve. You have no idea what it’s like when everyone around you is tiptoeing around…” He caught Peter grinning. “Of course you know. All three of us know.”

He paused for a long time. “You know, Tony’s right. You do got some wisdom about you, kid.”

“What this time?” Peter said smiling softly. It was something he and Tony knew, but no one else understood. Age didn’t have anything to do with it. They understood each other. There were things Tony understood and Peter didn’t. There were things Peter understood and Tony didn’t. And there were things they both understood. Age was experiences and maturity. Age had nothing to do with understanding.

“What you told me last night. Comparing… pain. The number of pains doesn’t matter, really. Because when you’re in the middle of one… it’s just as bad as the other guy’s is. No matter what the count. Counting just makes you hate yourself. Either you don’t think you have the right to feel that way because others have it worse…” Peter sighed and nodded. “…Or the weight of it is…” Bucky closed his eyes. When he opened them, he looked at the ceiling before looking at Peter again. “…It’s incomprehensible. When you start comparing, the spiral of hating yourself never ends.”

Peter reached across on the bench they were sharing and touched his fingertips to Bucky’s metal ones. Bucky started to pull away. Peter put his whole hand over the back of Bucky’s.

“People don’t touch me there,” he said quietly.

“Why?”

“It frightens them.”

“Huh. Really?”

“I suppose.”

“Can you feel it?”

Bucky tilted his head to the side and looked at Peter.

“Can you?” Peter asked again.

“No one’s ever asked. Not even Steve.”

“Really?” Peter’s eyes went wide. “Well, can you?”

Bucky nodded. “It’s not the same though.”

“I wouldn’t think so. The neural net would have to be totally different. Even this one that you got in Wakanda, it can’t interface with what isn’t there. It has to interface through the nerves of your shoulder… It does interface there, right?” Peter asked.

Bucky nodded. “Through my shoulder.”

“Tony’s latest suit that he's working on will interface directly to his mind. He'll think ‘do something’ and it will. Nerves don’t have to be there.”

Bucky paused. “How do you know how my arm works?”

“Data mining. Tony backdoored into Fury’s system, like, ages ago. JARVIS ran the program.”

“JARVIS is Vision now.”

“Uh… yeah mostly. Anyway, Tony got everything. What he didn’t was in the files Ms. Widow released…”

Bucky laughed quietly. “Ms. Widow? Does Romanova know you call her that?”

“No. I haven’t seen her since Berlin. It just didn’t seem right for me to call her…” Peter smiled. “She’s amazing and so… Wait. Romanova? I thought it was Romanoff.”

“Russian naming convention. Natalia Romanova. Natasha Romanoff. Or Ms. Widow, to you kid.” Bucky grinned. “She’ll die when I tell her that.”

“You know her? I mean… Yeah, of course… It just sounded…”

“I was her weapons trainer in Russia,” Bucky explained. “We went on missions together. Another me, another her.”

“Anyway,” Peter changed the subject, “whatever Fury knows, Tony knows, which means FRIDAY knows, which means Tony thinks I don’t know, except I think he really does know that I know…”

“Planning on coming round to your point anytime soon, Pete?”

“Fuck. How long has he been there?” Peter asked Bucky.

“Long enough to know that FRIDAY and I need to have a talk about you,” Tony said.

“Yeah, but what are you going to do about JARVIS’ air-gapped source matrix who tells me how to break into FRIDAY?”

“Will you shut the hell up, kid?” Tony said in a warning whisper. “Did you not just see Mr. Flappy-coat walk by here a few moments ago?”

“Wouldn’t that be Colonel Flappy-coat?” Bucky asked.

“Hush. Say his name three times and he appears,” Peter warned.

“That would be Beetlejuice, Parker,” Fury said. “Barnes? Ten a.m. tomorrow morning. I have business elsewhere, Hill will handle your next debrief.”

“Yes sir,” Bucky said, standing.

“Jesus fucking Christ, pretty, if you salute him…”

Fury raised his eyebrow at Tony’s nickname for Barnes.

“You don’t salute a retired officer in civilian clothes, Tony.”

“But standing’s a nice touch,” Fury said as he and his flappy-coat left the building.

~~~~~

Bucky started to climb into the cockpit of the helicopter.

“Flies itself,” Tony said. “Unless you’re particularly in the mood,” he added with a shrug.

“Habit,” Bucky said sheepishly and climbed into the passenger compartment with Tony and Peter.

They sat in awkward silence until Bucky finally broke it. “Will you be reviewing everything I say to Fury?”

“Directly? No. FRIDAY will be. I don’t really care if you killed JFK or if that’s a rumor.”

“Not a rumor,” Bucky said, staring out the window.

“So?” Tony said dismissively. “There are things she knows I’m interested in. Anything to do with Stark. Anything to do with the Avengers or enhanced individuals. A bit of financial data here and there.” Peter looked at him sideways. Tony shrugged. “All that,” he said, nodding towards the Avengers compound shrinking in the distance, “doesn’t pay for itself. It’s only insider trading if you get caught. I don’t.”

“About Steve?”

“I could lie, but I don’t. Yes, about Rogers. Past and present. Do I care about his current location? I care more about what happened on the Grassy Knoll. But I will not be blindsided by him again. I stopped giving a damn about him when he left me for dead in Siberia.”

“We left you. You were alive.”

“Only one of you was walking under his own steam. You went where he brought you. Away from me, which was sensible at the time. But this?” Tony tapped his arc reactor. “Not a fuckin’ night light. The shield cracked through the suit’s RT, through the sapphire-glass, and left the coils damaged. FRIDAY was busy trying to decide which was more important, keeping my heart functioning or keeping me from dying of hypothermia.” Tony’s anger and voice rose as he spoke.

“I didn’t know,” Peter gasped. “You were fine when you brought me home from Berlin.”

“I called a new suit with a replacement arc reactor. Which drained the shattered one in me more. But even at Mach 7, it takes over an hour to get from New York to Siberia. Long time to be lying there at sub-zero while your heart is deciding whether or not it wants to keep going for a little while longer. Not that Rogers gave a damn.”

“I didn’t know,” Bucky said, repeating Peter. “Steve said you had it removed.”

“I did. Steve also knew that I had to have it put back when smaller pieces of shrapnel started moving, broken off when Doctor Wu removed the larger ones. He was very aware of what an attack here,” Tony touched the arc again, “would do.”

“I was trying to power down your suit,” Bucky said quietly. “Not kill you.”

“From my perspective, it looked like you were. Rogers could’ve told you. He could’ve told us both a lot of things. He didn’t. So yeah… I’m going to be picking your debrief over for things about him.” Tony took several steadying breaths and tried to hide the fact that his hand dropped to the seat, seeking Peter’s. Which it found.

“I’m not going after him, Bucky. He can stay gone. If he walks through those doors?” He nodded again in the direction of the compound, which had faded from sight. “I’m not sure I can operate under his command. That’s disingenuous. I’m sure I can’t operate under his command. I’ll go back to being a consultant to the Avengers and to being Iron Man. Two very separate things.

“Things are complicated. I don’t want them to be, but they are. I have issues over who you are and… who you’re not. You’ve got issues over me and Rogers about this. It’s not going to resolve in a day or two. I know that. But the fact that you’re sitting here, of all places?” Tony nodded. “It’s a hell of a lot more responsibility for… things… than he’s taken. I can respect that.”

“That you opened the elevator door given everything… I can respect that as well.”

“That’s something to start from,” Tony said.

“And it always ends with what are you going to feed me?” Peter said. “Spider metabolism, remember? We slept in. No breakfast. We flew upstate. No lunch. Are you trying to starve me?”

“I’ll cook. You have an entire grocery store in your cupboards, Tony,” Bucky said, shaking his head in disbelief.

“The Depression was almost a century ago.” Tony rolled his eyes.

“For some people in this helicopter it was about fifteen years ago. I’ll cook.”

“Billionaire, remember? I’ll order in.”

“What do you do with the food in your house?”

“He mostly burns it,” Peter cheerfully offered.

#starker #winterironspider #WIS An Accord #Von writes stuff

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lastbluetardis · 5 years

Text

Family of Six (6/14)

After James and Rose bring their newborn twins home, they work to find a balance between all four of their children, and each other. Ten x Rose AU, Soulmates AU.

This chapter: Teen, 6200 words

Ages of the Tyler-McCrimmons at the start of the chapter: James: 39, Rose: 33, Ainsley: 9, Sianin: (almost) 6, Twins: 3 weeks

If you like reading my stories, consider leaving me a tip? Or leave a reply on this post to tell me what you thought? And as always, reblogs are very much appreciated so more people can see this.

Next update: September 10th

AO3 | TSP | FF | Perfectly Matched Series

Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Ch5 | Ch6 | Ch7 | Ch8 | Ch9 | Ch10 | Ch11 | Ch12 | Ch13 | Ch14

Later that night, after he had fallen into a fitful sleep, James stirred at a quiet voice calling his name and a small hand shaking his arm.

“Daddy?”

He grunted and opened his eyes, blinking against the darkness until Sianin’s face came into focus. His foggy brain immediately cleared. “Yes, darling?”

“Can I sleep with you and Mummy?” she whispered.

“The twins are in here,” he said.

“Oh.”

Her eyes glistened with tears and he cursed himself for his phrasing.

“I merely meant that you might hear them crying throughout the night. I know that sometimes bothers you. But you can still sleep here if you want. C’mere.” He patted the edge of the mattress. “Want to be sandwiched between me and Mummy?”

“Uh huh.” Sianin clambered onto the bed, then crawled over him until she was at the center of the mattress.

Her movements woke Rose, who turned towards them.

“Sianin?” she asked sleepily, squinting.

“Daddy said I could sleep in here.”

“‘Course you can. Is everything all right, sweetheart?”

James tucked the blankets under Sianin’s chin, then he slid his pillow closer to the middle of the bed for her. He brushed her silky hair away from her face, then continued to stroke it just because he could. After her disastrous bedtime a few hours earlier, he wasn’t going to question why his daughter wanted to be with him and Rose.

The room was silent for a few long seconds, and right when he was certain Sianin wasn’t going to answer her mother’s question, she asked, “Do you still love me like you used to?”

His hand froze mid-stroke. The question shattered his heart into a million pieces, the shrapnel shredding through his stomach and chest until his whole body ached with despair and devastation.

She can’t possible think…

His head swam as he and Rose moved at the same time to pull their daughter into their arms, resulting in a tangle of limbs as they squished Sianin between them.

“Of course we still love you, darling,” he rasped, trying to resist the impulse to yank Sianin out of Rose’s arms so he could give her a proper hug. “We never stopped. Never.”

At the same time, Rose said, “We love you so, so much Sianin. So much.”

Sianin sniffled in the dark and turned into Rose’s chest, clinging to her mother. James tried not to be offended.

“Daddy and I love you so very incredibly much,” Rose murmured into Sianin’s hair. “I can’t begin to tell you how much we love you. The feeling is too great to be put into words. There is no five-year-old on the planet more loved than you are by us.”

“Why did you want new babies then?” she asked, her voice muffled by Rose’s chest. “Were Ainsley and me not good enough?”

“That’s not it at all, Sianin,” James said, wanting to pull her into his arms and squeeze her tightly. He thought that if he could only hold her close enough, she’d be able to feel the very beating of his heart and realize that it beat for her. “Just because Mummy and I had more babies doesn’t mean we were in any way dissatisfied with you or Ainsley. Far, far from it. We love you and Ainsley more than anything in the universe. Nobody could ever replace either of you in our lives.”

“But the babies…”

“They’re not a replacement. They’re an addition.”

Sianin continued sniffling into Rose’s shirt. James was helpless to do anything; Rose had folded Sianin so completely into herself that he couldn’t easily touch any part of his daughter. He settled for resting his hand on her arm and rubbing it with his thumb.

“I’m so sorry you thought you were being replaced,” he whispered. He wondered how long she’d thought that. Was it a more recent feeling? Since they’d brought the twins home? Or had it been ever since they’d announced Rose’s pregnancy? He prayed she hadn’t felt like this for the last seven months. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I want things to be like they were before,” Sianin whimpered. James envied Rose and the way their daughter burrowed into her for comfort.

“I know,” Rose said, rocking her gently. “But we can’t go back to that. We need to try to move forward as best we can. It’s all right to be sad for what you lost; you knew one way of life and that’s gone now. And it’s absolutely okay to be sad about that.”

Sianin cried harder into Rose’s chest, and James wanted to snap to Rose that she wasn’t helping. But he stayed quiet; the last thing they needed was to start an argument in front of their distraught child. And maybe it was best if Sianin cried it out, long and hard, even if it killed him to watch.

When Sianin’s sobs dissipated, Rose said, “It’s okay to take as long as you need to be sad and to adjust to the new phase of our family. But try not to only see the negatives, yeah? That’s not a healthy way to look at the world. Hannah and Maddie are a permanent part of our family, and being upset or angry won’t change that.”

Sianin gulped down several lungfuls of air and sniffled thickly. “The babies aren’t what you said they’d be.”

James reached behind him for a handful of tissues, which he passed to Rose.

“How so?” Rose asked, wiping Sianin’s eyes and nose.

“Everyone said they’d be fun. That they’d be friends I could play with. But they’re not.”

“It will take a bit of time to play with them the way you want to,” Rose said.

“You should’ve said that.”

“You’re right. We’re sorry,” Rose said, kissing the top of Sianin’s head. “What should we have said instead? Hmm… that they’d come out looking like pink-faced dough blobs? And are about as squishy as a dough blob, too?”

Sianin giggled a bit. It was a thin, watery sound, but it was a giggle nonetheless.

“Or… they’d be loud little poo machines?” Rose mused.

Sianin giggled again. She was quiet for a moment, then she asked, “Does Ainsley still love me like before?”

“Of course she does,” Rose said.

“She spends lots of time with the babies now,” Sianin said sadly.

“I know. She likes helping with them and playing with them.”

“But they don’t play,” Sianin argued.

“They can be interacted with,” Rose said. “Now that Maddie is smiling, it’s more fun to be with her. Hannah will get there, too. Maybe you can join in with Ainsley when she plays with the twins?”

Sianin didn’t answer. Instead, she asked, “Can I stay in here all night?”

“For as long as you’d like,” Rose said, kissing her daughter’s forehead. She then caught James’s eye and murmured to Sianin, “Can you go give Daddy a good cuddle? I have to wee.”

Sianin rolled over and crashed into James’s chest. He didn’t know whether Rose actually needed the toilet or if she was just letting him have a turn at holding their daughter, but he appreciated it nevertheless. He had to stop himself from squeezing Sianin as hard as he wanted to, and instead clutched her to his chest and pivoted so he was on his back and her head was pillowed in the crook of his shoulder. She wrapped an arm around his middle and draped a leg over his thigh, hugging him tight.

“I love you,” he whispered into Sianin’s hair, kissing the top of her head. “I love you more than you’ll ever know, Sianin.”

“Love you, too,” she said, tangling her fists into his sleep shirt. “Will you tell me a story?”

“Absolutely,” he said. He bought himself a few seconds to think as he fussed with the sheets, tucking her in. When they were settled, he began to speak. “Once upon a time, there was a beautiful little princess named Shannon…”

“That’s almost like my name.”

“Shush, it’s Shannon, not Sianin.”

Sianin laughed and nestled further into his arms. He couldn’t resist kissing the top of her head again.

“Anyways, once upon a time, there was a beautiful little princess named Shannon who was beloved by her entire kingdom, but by none more than her parents. Princess Shannon loved doing everything by herself, because she was a big girl princess. And she loved helping to clean the castle—she helped the maids with the washing up, she helped the butler prepare meals, she helped the stable boys take care of the horses.”

“Sounds like a lot of work being a princess,” Sianin mumbled, burrowing her face into his chest.

“She enjoyed the chores.”

“No one enjoys chores, Daddy,” Sianin rebutted.

“Princess Shannon did,” James argued. “D’you want to hear the rest of the story or not?”

“I guess,” she said through a yawn.

“Princess Shannon was such a big helper around the castle, but her parents didn’t realize all she did because they were so used to the chores simply being done. Well, Princess Shannon felt very sad about this because her parents didn’t seem to recognize anything she did. So she decided she was never going to leave her room ever again.

“However, when she did that, the castle started falling apart. And not just ‘cos she wasn’t helping with the cleaning. But because the magic of the castle was…”

“The castle’s magic?”

“Yep. The magic of the castle was tied to the magic within Princess Shannon. And because Princess Shannon felt sad and lonely, the castle reflected that. It turned dark and rainy; all the trees lost their leaves as though it were wintertime instead of the height of summer. The windows weren’t sparkly anymore, and the golden halls and gem-encrusted thrones were dull, tarnished, and cracked.

“The king and queen thought a powerful curse had been set over the castle, and they were so worried about their Princess Shannon. When they got to Princess Shannon’s room, they saw that the door had turned to solid iron and nobody could get in.

“Princess Shannon didn’t even realize what was happening to the castle since she’d been in her room the whole time. Her magic and the castle’s magic managed to slow the passage of time. Time was moving slower inside her bedroom than it was in the rest of the castle. So while only a few hours passed for Princess Shannon, a few days had passed for her mummy and daddy.

“She couldn’t hear her mummy and daddy calling for her, nor could she hear any of the locksmiths’ attempts to break down the door. After a while, Princess Shannon decided she didn’t want to be alone in her room anymore. So she stood up, pushed open the door, and saw her mummy and her daddy in the corridor. They’d been beside themselves with worry and were so happy to see her and so relieved that she was safe. Queen Mummy plucked Princess Shannon up into her arms, then King Daddy plucked up his queen and his princess into his arms.”

“King Daddy must be very strong,” Sianin commented.

“The strongest,” James agreed. “The king and queen apologized to their princess, and promised never to take her for granted ever again. They joined the princess as she helped around the castle because they realized the castle looked its best when everyone helps out. And they liked spending all that extra time with their beautiful little princess, too.”

“What kind of magic powers did Princess Shannon have?” Sianin asked, her voice thick with impending sleep.

“That’ll be tomorrow’s bedtime story,” James replied, already apologizing to his future self. “Get some sleep now, darling.”

Sianin splayed out all of her limbs and somehow managed to take up nearly every inch of their king-sized bed.

Rose had returned from the loo a while ago but was sitting in the rocking chair in the corner, nursing the twins.

“A princess who enjoys doing chores, eh?” Rose teased when she was certain Sianin was asleep.

“Figured it was worth a try,” he said, sticking his tongue out at her. “Are you okay over there? Need a hand?”

“Nah, you’ve got your hands full. I thought I’d feed them before they woke up. Maybe we’ll get a few uninterrupted hours,” Rose answered.

James hummed, then turned back to Sianin. She looked peaceful; all traces of her prior anguish were gone. He brushed his fingers through her hair as he watched her sleep. His heart ached with love for his child, and with sorrow that she’d doubted how loved she was.

“You okay?” Rose asked quietly.

“Not really,” he admitted.

“Me either,” she said.

She stood with the twins and put them in their bassinets before slipping into bed, carefully scooting Sianin to the middle of the mattress.

“She’ll be okay,” Rose said, but it sounded as though she were convincing herself rather than stating a fact.

“Yeah, she will be,” James said, kissing Sianin’s soft hair.

The night went as well as could be expected. The twins woke up every couple of hours, wanting to be changed or fed. Sianin woke to their crying each time, burying her face into James’s chest and whining that they were being loud.

“They’ll quiet down soon,” James soothed. “Close your eyes and sleep, darling.”

Since he was busy trying to get Sianin back to sleep, Rose was left to attend to the twins by herself. James felt guilty every time Rose slipped out of bed; he’d find some way to make it up to her.

Sianin’s mood returned to normal the next morning; she went about her day as though nothing in the world was wrong. It might have helped that it was her actual birthday, too.

As per usual, the family went out for dinner at a restaurant of Sianin’s choosing. Of course she picked a fast-food chain, but she was ecstatic about it, and that was all James and Rose cared about.

The only sign she wasn’t quite okay was her new habit of sleeping with them. They would put her to sleep in her own bed, but inevitably, she would always venture into their room in the middle of the night. She also began struggling with wetting the bed—that was often the impetus for her wandering into their room.

Sianin was mortified and upset by her nighttime accidents, even though James and Rose assured her many times over that it was okay and they weren’t angry or upset with her. But they’d taken to putting a protective plastic covering on Sianin’s bed to help keep the mess from saturating into her mattress. Thankfully, she’d never wet their bed when she slept with them.

Because of their new bedmate, the amount of restful sleep James and Rose obtained decreased exponentially; not only because they would get up to take care of Sianin’s bedding, if needed, but also because they were hyper-aware of the small body beside them, and were concerned whether their child was comfortable. Not to mention Sianin tended to sleep at odd angles which pushed them to the far edges of the mattress.

The additional loss of sleep was a sore hit when they were already losing sleep due to nighttime newborn care, but it never crossed their minds to refuse Sianin entry into bed with them.

“Do you think something’s really wrong?” James asked the weekend after Sianin’s birthday as he once more put Sianin’s soiled bedsheets into the washer.

“I don’t know,” Rose sighed. “I’ve been reading these parenting blogs and everyone says it’s normal for kids to regress a little bit after the birth of a new baby.”

“It breaks my heart.”

“Mine too. I don’t know if we can do anything though. If we kick her out of our room, we might make her worse.” Rose shook her head. “Maybe our girls’ day out will be good for her.”

“I’m sure it will. It’ll be good for you, if nothing else. You haven’t had much time to spend out with just Ainsley and Sianin.”

“Neither have you,” Rose countered. “You’ll have to schedule a daddy-daughter day with them soon.”

Rose and their eldest children had haircut appointments later in the morning, then manicures in the early afternoon.

That left James to spend a bit of quality time with the twins. He spent the morning tidying the house while the babies slept, and when they woke up, he got them fed and changed before bundling them up for their very first trip to the supermarket.

“Daddy is gonna show you two all the ins and outs of grocery shopping,” James said as he hefted the dual-baby carrier into a trolley. He fussed with it for a moment to make sure it was secure.

“The key is to have a list,” he continued, pulling a small piece of paper from his pocket and wiggling it in front of his sleeping babies’ faces. “Because if you don’t, you’ll end up buying things you don’t need and forgetting everything you do need. You also should never go when you’re hungry; you’ll buy out the entire store and your bank account will be quite sad. Vice versa, you shouldn’t go when you’ve just eaten a huge meal and are stuffed; you’ll not want to buy anything and you’ll have an empty fridge in two days’ time.”

James checked his list, then began heading through the aisles with a purpose.

“It’s also a good idea to get the not-cold foodstuffs first,” he explained, picking up a box of oatmeal and cereal. “You don’t want the ice cream to melt whilst you’re doing the rest of your shopping.”

He continued to talk mindlessly at his babies throughout the shopping trip. He was interrupted several times by other people cooing down at the twins. He was always glad to show off his beautiful children, but he didn’t want to prolong their trip and risk one of them waking up cranky.

He was finally getting to the cold section when Hannah woke up.

“Hello, my sweet girl,” he said down to her. She was blinking groggily up at him as though she had no idea where she was or who she was with. He recognized that look and began unfastening her restraints a second before her face crumpled and she let out a distressed wail. Maddie stayed blessedly asleep.

“You’re okay.” He brought the baby to his chest and brushed kisses to her scalp. “You’re okay, my Hannah-banana. Ooh, bananas. Gotta get some of those now that your mummy isn’t getting sick from the smell of them. We’re at the supermarket. It’s where we buy food, because the rest of the Earthly population doesn’t have Mummy’s breasts to feed them. Er. That came out weird. But you have no idea what I’m even saying, do you?”

Hannah continued crying into his chest. He unbuttoned the bottom of her onesie, but her nappy was still dry and a quick sniff test told him she hadn’t pooed. She shouldn’t be hungry, as he had fed her right before they left the house. But she was utterly inconsolable; her little face was red and actual tears were leaking down her cheeks. The sight of them twisted something deep in his heart.

“Oh, darling.” He rocked his torso in an attempt to soothe her. “It’s okay. It’s okay. We’re almost done here. I’ll bet you’re a tad overwhelmed, eh? You went to sleep safe and sound in Mummy’s arms, and now you’re in a whole new scary place. But Daddy’s right here. Daddy’s got you. We’re in the supermarket getting a bit of food for our Mother’s Day cookout tomorrow. Daddy’s got everything on his list except the eggs and the milk. Bear with Daddy for five more minutes and we’ll go home, my darling girl.”

James fumbled to keep his grip on his furious baby while he pushed the trolley towards the refrigerated section. He grabbed a jug of milk at random, pausing long enough to check that it hadn’t passed its expiration date. Then he went to the eggs, picking up the first carton his fingers touched without checking if any were cracked. At this point, a couple of cracked eggs would be worth getting out of the supermarket as quickly as possible.

He made his way to the self-checkout and blessedly found one that was open.

“Almost done,” he whispered, nuzzling his baby’s wispy hair. “Daddy is trying his very, very best. I know you’re not happy, Han. I know. It’s so hard being you, isn’t it? The world is so big and scary, and you’re stuck with your old dad instead of Mummy. We’ll get home soon, my love. Can’t you please calm down, eh? Please?”

His ears were beginning to hurt from having a screaming baby right next to them.

“She might be wet.”

James continued scanning his groceries until a hand touched his arm. He glanced over and saw an upper-middle-aged woman smiling sympathetically at him.

“I said, she might be wet,” the woman repeated, nodding to Hannah. “You should check her nappy. They need changing every few hours.”

James blinked.

“I know,” he said slowly, frowning at the woman. “I’ve already checked that, but thanks.”

James loaded his bagged items into his trolley, and the woman followed.

“You’re not holding her right,” the woman said. “You should try cradling her up against your chest with her legs and arms tucked up into her body. Babies that young usually like that position. Here, let me show you. I know it can be hard for some dads to get the hang of it. My husband was a bit useless, honestly.”

The woman laughed like there was some joke that James wasn’t privy to, then she extended her hands towards the baby.

“Excuse me, don’t touch my daughter,” James growled, pivoting so that his body was between this stranger and Hannah. His sharp movement made Hannah let out a shriek, and by now, he wanted to join her.

“I’m only trying to help,” the woman said, looking startled.

“I’m sure you meant well and all,” James snapped, “but she is my daughter. I can handle my own child, thanks very much. Just because your husband was bloody rubbish when it came to child care doesn’t mean all men are. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to get her home.”

James turned his back to the wide-eyed woman and ignored her spluttered apologies and indignations. He paid for the groceries as quickly as he could, suddenly all too aware of the eyes on him. It seemed that everyone in the store was looking at him either with pity or annoyance.

“It’s not like I’m asking her to scream her little head off,” James grumbled under his breath, pushing the trolley out to his car. His hands shook as he settled Hannah and Maddie into their car seats. Maddie was now awake and looking as though she was contemplating crying as well. “Oh, please, Maddie, shush. You’re fine, darling. Your sister is having a bad day, but you’re okay. Right? Yes? My sweet, quiet girl?”

“It’s rubbish gettin’ stuck babysittin’ one, and ‘ere you’ve got two? Rotten luck, mate.”

James turned and saw a man helping a toddler out of a car.

“Good luck with ‘em,” the man said, giving him a salute.

“It’s not babysitting when they’re your own kids,” James hissed even though the man had walked away and couldn’t hear him. “Bloody fucking hell.” He cringed. “Oops, I’m sorry, girls. Daddy shouldn’t use that language. Though you’re only a month old and have no idea what I’m saying. But still. It’s bad practice. That man and the lady in the shop really got under my skin, you see. Daddy’s really frustrated right now.”

James sucked in a deep breath and held it for a minute, listening to his crying child and feeling as though he could start sobbing any minute now too. He shut the car door, muffling the sounds of Hannah’s distress as he loaded the groceries into the boot.

The drive home was torture. Both babies were wailing at the tops of their lungs, giving James a splitting headache.

“’Course you choose now to realize you can scream too,” James snapped bitterly to Maddie, glaring at her through the rear mirror. As soon as the words left his mouth, he felt terrible. He shouldn’t get angry with his children.

His cheeks flamed with shame, and he mumbled, “Sorry, Maddie. I’m sorry. That was wrong of me to say. I’m so sorry you’re in distress too.”

Nothing seemed to soothe his babies, no matter what he said or how gently he spoke. He made a great effort to keep his voice calm and low, yet still they wailed.

Eventually, about two minutes from home, Maddie quieted down again, but Hannah was still going strong. He kept her in her car seat as he ferried the groceries into the house. He unloaded all of the cold items into the fridge and freezer, but left the room-temperature things for later.

He then came out and fetched Maddie from her car seat. She gave him a bright smile as he unfastened all of her straps, and he couldn’t help but smile back, despite Hannah screaming in the next seat.

“I love you loads, Maddie,” he murmured to her as he took her into his arms.

He settled her into the cot in the living room, then went out for his other baby. He tried not to feel like a horrible father at the dread that unfurled through him at the idea of bringing Hannah into the quiet house.

“You can’t leave your baby in the car,” he muttered to himself. “You can’t leave your baby in the car. You can’t leave your baby in the car. You can’t leave your baby in the car…”

He continued the pep talk as he opened the car door and pulled Hannah out of her seat. He tried to support her head and neck even though all she evidently wanted to do was wriggle madly from side to side.

“Hannah, please,” he begged, his frustration nearly choking him. “Please, sweetheart, I don’t know what’s wrong. Daddy has no idea what you want. Are you hungry? You shouldn’t be, but let’s try some milk, eh?”

He hurriedly warmed up a bottle, then spent the next fifteen minutes coaxing Hannah into trying to nurse. She suckled on and off, but only got through a third of the bottle before refusing to take any more.

“What’s wrong, Han?” he whispered, walking all around the house with his wailing baby. “What’s the matter? You’re not hungry. Your nappy is clean. Are you ill? Are you not feeling well? Is maybe your little tummy hurting? ‘Cos I’ve got to admit, I’m at a loss. I don’t know what else to do for you, sweetheart. I’m trying so hard.”

James continued walking and talking, wishing that Rose was there with him and resenting that she wasn’t. As soon as he thought that, he was consumed with crippling guilt and remorse. Rose deserved to have a day out with their other two children, and Ainsley and Sianin deserved a day alone with their mum. There was no reason he shouldn’t be able to handle his own babies.

“I don’t know what to do,” he said again through the lump in his throat, making yet another circuit through the house.

It took nearly an hour before Hannah cried herself out. At that point, James himself was in the middle of a crying episode. He had set Hannah on a blanket he’d laid out on the living room floor as he succumbed to his anger and frustration. Unable to deal with his crying child for a moment longer, he shut himself into his and Rose’s bedroom—the door barely muffled Hannah’s shrieks—just as his own tears started. He collapsed onto his bed and smothered his cries and curses into his pillow as he pleaded with the universe for his baby to go to sleep.

He wasn’t sure how long it had been before he realized the house was silent. His ears rang in the silence, and he was so, so tempted to stay in his bedroom and fall asleep. But he dragged himself up and into the living room to make sure Hannah hadn’t somehow suffocated herself and that was the reason she was being quiet. But no, she was still alive and breathing, fast asleep with tears and snot streaked across her face. He didn’t dare wipe it away for fear that it would wake her again. Instead, he held his breath and draped a blanket over his child. She stayed asleep.

Maddie was contentedly sleeping in her own bassinet, looking positively angelic in comparison to the hell Hannah had put him through over the last hour and a half.

James swiped at his own runny nose and swollen eyes as he collapsed in an exhausted heap on the couch, overstimulated and overwhelmed, with a pounding headache pulsing behind his eyes.

He must have fallen asleep, because the next he knew, the front door was being wrenched open and the pattering of tiny feet entered the house.

“Hi Daddy!”

Sianin and Ainsley made a beeline for him, and he shook off the vestiges of sleep to admire their new haircuts—they’d each gotten about an inch lopped off—and their perfectly painted nails.

“You are the most beautiful girls in the entire universe!” he proclaimed, giving them each a smacking kiss on the cheek. “You’re making me feel like an ugly old toad.”

“You’re the handsomest Daddy in the whole wide universe,” Sianin said with a definitive nod.

That declaration erased a fraction of his former bad mood. He leaned forward and scooped her into his arms, hugging her tight.

“Thanks, Sian,” he said, giving her another kiss before releasing her.

“Took a kip instead of putting away the groceries?”

James looked over at Rose. Her tone was teasing, but it sparked his irritation nevertheless.

“Got a bit worn out when Hannah went on a marathon cry,” he said thinly.

Rose’s brows furrowed.

“She didn’t like her first trip to the supermarket,” he said, rubbing his fingers into his tired eyes.

“Uh oh.”

“Yeah,” he said. “I’m a bit knackered.”

Rose stepped up behind him and rubbed her fingers through his hair. Goosebumps broke out across his scalp, making him moan and melt back against the couch.

“Can you do this for the next century?” he mumbled, letting his eyes slip shut.

“I’ll do this ‘til a child interrupts us,” Rose said instead.

“Good enough.” He hummed as she continued her massage. She knew the places to apply pressure, and he could have wept with the relief her fingers brought. Within ten minutes, she’d unknotted most of his tense muscles and had put a dent in his headache.

“I love you,” she whispered in his ear before she kissed his temple.

“Mmm.”

“Sorry Hannah was bad for you. How was Mads?”

“Perfect,” he replied. “Got a bit worked up on the car ride home, but soothed herself to sleep again. Hannah, on the other hand, decided to cry into my ear for at least an hour after we got home.”

Rose made a sound of sympathy as she began her massage anew.

“Did you have a nice day?” he asked.

“Yeah, I did. Though I feel a bit guilty about that now.”

He reached up and fumbled for her hand. He tilted his head back and forced open his eyes. “Don’t. I’m glad you had a good day.”

She pecked a quick kiss to his forehead.

“Are you hungry?” Rose asked.

“What time is it?” he asked.

“Just after four.”

He jolted upright. “Four?! Shit. The twins haven’t eaten since this morning. Shit!”

“I’ll get them,” she said, patting his shoulder. “Relax. It’s okay.”

“I’ve bloody starved them,” he grumbled.

“They would’ve let you know if you did that,” Rose said gently.

She pressed another kiss to his forehead, then came around to gather the twins.

“Get Maddie to latch first,” he said anxiously. “I gave Hannah a little bit from a bottle during her meltdown, but Mads hasn’t had anything all day.”

Rose nodded in acknowledgement and dutifully picked Maddie up out of her cot. She was awake and flashed a grin at her mother upon being picked up.

“Hello my sweetie,” Rose cooed. Maddie nuzzled into Rose’s chest, rooting for her mother’s breast. “I know you’re hungry. You were so good for Daddy today, weren’t you?”

James forced his aching limbs to move off the couch and gather up Hannah. She stayed dead asleep.

Rose sat on the sofa and got Maddie latched, then she accepted Hannah. It took a few tries before Hannah woke up enough to nurse lazily.

“God, that’s better,” Rose groaned. “My boobs were so full.”

James didn’t answer. He just sat down beside her and carefully draped his arm around Rose’s shoulders and rested his head against the top of hers.

“Your hair looks nice,” he commented when he smelled the salon shampoo.

“You didn’t notice a difference, did you?” she asked wryly.

“I did!” he protested. “It’s… shorter.”

“That’s usually the result of a hair cut. Otherwise it’s some sort of witchcraft.” She let him squirm for a second before saying, “I just got a trim. I’ve been thinking of letting it grow out a little? I dunno. Though I do need to get my roots touched up next time.”

James pulled back a fraction and saw that her roots were indeed beginning to darken.

“Why do you dye your hair?” he asked.

Rose shrugged. “Been doin’ it for so long I guess I see myself as a blonde, even if it does come out of a bottle. It’s not nearly as trashy as it was when I was a teen.”

“It wasn’t trashy,” he argued.

“I bought the cheapest bleaching product,” Rose said with a chuckle. “It’s okay. I know it was trashy.”

“I thought you were beautiful, no matter what,” he said, kissing her temple.

“You’re sweet.”

“S’why you married me.”

“Yep, that’s the only reason,” she said, rolling her eyes.

He snorted and tucked his cheek into her hair.

“Did you get your nails done?” he asked.

“Mhm.” She managed to rotate her hand from where it was propping Maddie. Her nails were a lovely shade of pastel green with little white flowers painted in the center.

“Very springy,” he said.

“‘Tis the season and all. I was gonna get our toes done, but I didn’t think the girls would sit well for that. Their feet are a bit too ticklish.”

“Good idea,” James said. He reached out and stroked his fingertips across the planes of Hannah’s face. She was half-asleep as she nursed from Rose’s breast; the constant start-stop rhythm of her feeding created quite a mess of milk around her chin and neck. “She looks like a precious little angel. You never would’ve thought she spent the afternoon deafening the entire country.”

“Sorry she was so bad for you.”

James shook off her apology. “It wouldn’t have been as bad had not this older woman made me feel like an incompetent father.”

Rose frowned. “What happened?”

“Just someone trying to help but not actually helping,” he sighed. “Hannah started her fit in the middle of the supermarket, so I tried to hold her to calm her down. Evidently I looked like I was struggling, ‘cos this lady approached me and tried giving me all this advice, including how I was holding her wrong.”

Rose gasped. “No she didn’t!”

“Indeed she did.”

“What a cun… What an arsehole!”

“I was already feeling a bit self-conscious, and that didn’t help,” James admitted. “I honestly had a bit of a cry earlier. I was overwhelmed.”

“Oh, James.” Rose leaned against him, pressing her cheek into his shoulder in a pseudo-hug. “Don’t mind anyone else. You are the best father a kid could ask for. You definitely do not hold our children wrong, and you are more than capable of handling yourself with our kids. I wouldn’t hesitate to leave you alone with all four of them.”

“Well, let’s not be hasty,” James said.

“Of course, I wouldn’t want to leave you at the mercy of four kids,” Rose amended. “But you know what I mean.”

“I do. And thanks, love.”

“Anytime.”

James looked around the living room, finally aware of how quiet the house was. “We seem to be missing two kids.”

“I think they’re coloring in Ainsley’s room,” Rose said. “Making Mother’s Day cards. Only it’s a surprise, so we’ve got to pretend I don’t know anything.”

“Ahh, ‘course,” he said, nodding. “It’s not like it’s an annual holiday.”

“Nope. I’m in for the surprise of my life tomorrow,” she dead-panned.

James chuckled and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

If you’ve made it to the end, consider leaving a comment or reblogging? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

#ficandchips #doctorroseprompts #dwfic #doctor who #ten x rose #ten x rose au #soulmates #soulmates au #soulmates verse #kid fic #baby fic #family fic #my fic #perfectly matched series #family of six

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