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bestworstcase · 3 years

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farran rereads lost lagoon: chapters 9-10

it’s been a hot minute! previous installments here, in case you’d like to refresh your memory first.

- this chapter opens with rapunzel observing that cassandra is angry and concluding, correctly, that it’s because rapunzel followed her. i think this is a very interesting choice for howland to make. tts rapunzel is not like this. she often, particularly in s1, fails to notice when cass is frustrated with her and is startled when that frustration erupts into anger after repeated pushing. she is also generally quite bad at linking cause and effect together like this; she might recognize that cass is angry, but miss why. she stomps all over cassandra’s boundaries in large part because she doesn’t know any better. she can’t see how her behavior is hurting cass. but lagoon rapunzel does know better. she’s far more emotionally intuitive, and she can see right away that sticking her nose into cassandra’s business upsets cass, yet she will continue to do it. part of me wonders if this change is to facilitate the character growth lagoon rapunzel gets (which tts rapunzel does not)? it’s much easier, after all, to fix poor behavior if you’re able to see how it’s hurting people you care about.

- rapunzel here also observes that cassandra’s “eyes were wide and vulnerable,” indicating how afraid cass was of the water situation. cass denies that she was afraid when rapunzel asks her. this has a lot of similarities to how cass acts in fanon, cassunzel fanon in particular—outright denying her feelings, even when rapunzel accurately identifies them. and i know i’m beating a dead horse here, but tts cass is not like this. tts cass readily expresses her feelings to rapunzel—except when she thinks rapunzel isn’t willing to listen to her. in COTB, her reticence with rapunzel comes on the heels of rapunzel doing something cassandra pleaded with her not to do. in RATGT, rapunzel outright tells her to ‘be okay with’ the way rapunzel treats her, and in RDO cass bottles up her feelings and refuses to talk until rapunzel forces her to. actively hiding her feelings is a behavior she develops after becoming friends with rapunzel, because rapunzel continually dismisses or ignores her feelings. this is probably not the last time i am going to harp on this over the course of this little reread. it’s a huge pet peeve of mine.

- re: romance novel: “I hadn’t seen Eugene since the night before. After Cassandra left my room, I sent Pascal to follow her. I instructed him to come get me if she went anywhere.” ksdkjf

- cassandra, of course, wants the lagoon to be their—or rather, ideally, her—little secret, because she’s decided this is the thing that will prove she’s ready for the guard. her approach to getting rapunzel on board with this secret-keeping is to imply that frederic and arianna might compromise corona’s national security if they are informed. i think this is very funny.

- (again, contrast this to what happens in tts: when cass begs rapunzel to keep their midnight excursion a secret, she explains her reasoning in detail, because tts cass knows how to communicate like an adult.)

- “It’s so…blue” jksdfl cass has a way with words huh

- i do not think ms howland knows what a lagoon is, because what she is describing is absolutely not a lagoon. it appears to be a cenote. i suppose ‘rapunzel and the lost cenote’ doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, though, does it?

- cassandra reveals that she doesn’t know how to swim. i will get into this in a moment.

- corona has 315 miles of coastline, according to ms. howland. for purposes of comparison, rhode island has around 380 miles of coastline. now! in addition to those three hundred odd miles of coastline, corona has 212 lakes, 121 ponds, 67 rivers, of which 17 are significant in size and let out into the sea. with some cursory research i haven’t been able to get a precise count of the number of freshwater bodies of water there are in rhode island, but wikipedia tells me that about 90% of the inland freshwater in the state is contained in 237 lakes and ponds, which is a bit less than corona’s 333 total lakes and ponds, so… assuming the other 10% of rhode island’s inland freshwater is contained in a few dozen smaller lakes and ponds, those numbers are quite close as well. and according to wikipedia, rhode island has 59 rivers, of which 17 are ‘considered major rivers either geographically or historically.’

there is not really a point to this digression except that i think it is interesting. rhode island is 1,214 square miles in size and based on the general closeness of these numbers i have decided to tentatively conclude that corona is meant to be roughly similar in size. let’s call it a nice even 1,250 square miles for the sake of ease and to account for the greater number of lakes and ponds.

this is quite a bit larger than the kingdom appears to be in tts—unless the kingdom is very lopsided and island city is situated within a couple dozen miles of the nearest border—but it’s also quite small for a country. (europe has a few very small microstates and city-states, but excluding those, the smallest country in europe is almost twice the size of rhode island).

for my own writing, i decided that corona was quite a bit larger than this—bitter snow corona is in the neighborhood of 13,125 square miles, of which about ⅓ was formerly saporia and another ¼ is the disputed territory/province of malinar, meaning saporia is/was about 4,375 square miles, malinar is about 3,288 square miles, and pre-conquest corona would have been about 5,462 square miles—but, if you’re writing fanfiction and looking for an approximate ‘canon’ size for corona, 1,250 sq miles is not a bad guess. just remember that that big old wall rapunzel’s so eager to get to the other side of has to be within about twenty miles of the island capital in order for horses to be able to comfortably get there and back in less than a day! so either the island has to be very near the nearest border, or the wall isn’t actually corona’s border but rather a defensive wall around the capital or something like that.

- now back to cassandra, and the matter of her inability to swim. i think, given that they live on an island and the generally high standards to which he holds his daughter, it beggars belief a little that the captain did not force the issue of her learning how. it’s a safety matter. if you live near water you need to be able to swim. but, fine, she has a phobia, whatever. it’s for the romance novel™

- but i hate this. i hate it. ms. howland expects me to believe that:

1 - cassandra hasn’t been in swimming lessons since she could walk

2 - cassandra’s phobia was so severe that the captain never forced the issue of her learning to swim, while living on an island

3 - rapunzel magically knows how to swim, because the three or four minutes she spent almost drowning in a slowly flooding cave and then being spat out into a river and dragged to the bank by eugene was sufficient for her to become a great swimmer.

4 - all it takes for cassandra to overcome her debilitating phobia of water is for rapunzel to spend maybe ten or fifteen minutes gently coaxing her into the water and teaching her how to tread water

5 - swimming in the lagoon with rapunzel then becomes one of cassandra’s most treasured pastimes, and

6 - merely a few months after this, cassandra is a strong enough swimmer to (in fitzherbert pi) DIVE INTO THE FUCKING OCEAN FULLY DRESSED WITH HER BOOTS ON in order to rescue shorty before he drowns.

and NO!!!!!! NO! THAT’S NOT HOW SWIMMING WORKS THAT’S NOT HOW ANYTHING WORKS!!

now i get it. i get it. this is a romance novel and the symbolism of rapunzel liberating cassandra from her fears and teaching her a valuable new skill that they bond over and becomes their shared special secret thing to do together is obviously powerful and a staple trope for the genre. but it makes so little sense for this to be a skill that rapunzel has but cassandra does not. it feels almost infantalizing of cassandra and aggrandizing of rapunzel. like… rapunzel is an exceptionally competent young woman, yes. but no she can’t fucking swim you can’t learn to swim from that one time you almost drowned in a FUCKING cave. fuck!

- i’m still on the first page of chapter 10 and i am steamed.

- “It’s amazing how fast you can pick something up when your life depends on it.” FUCK you, ms. howland. you don’t learn how to turn sommersalts or swim laps by almost drowning. at most you might teach yourself how to doggy paddle.

- this scene would have worked just as goddamn well on the romance novel front if cass were the one who knew how to swim and rapunzel desperately wanted to learn and made big sad puppy eyes until cass caved and agreed to teach her. like! ffs you could even squeeze in the phobia stuff - rapunzel freaks out when she gets to a certain depth because it throws her back to being in that cave and cass, who has plenty of experience dealing with her own panic attacks, is able to gently calm her down.

- but that would require ms. howland to allow rapunzel to be bad at something. grumble.

- i don’t think rapunzel is qualified to give cass exposure therapy.

- this is nitpicky but i’m annoyed. this is not how you clean plate armor. “First you hang your suit of armor up to make sure every piece is properly aligned and that there’s no rust” WHAT? it’s not… like, it’s not like a onesie. plate armor is a bunch of individual components tied or buckled to an arming doublet or, in some cases, to other pieces of plate. you can’t ‘hang up’ a suit of plate armor the way you’d hang up, like, a jacket. you can put the pieces together on an arming doublet that you’ve hung up on a dummy, but… why would you do that in order to clean it.

“Then you attach the foot coverings” gjksdfjk just… the mental image of cassandra painstakingly putting a suit of armor together on a fucking mannequin and buckling the sabatons to the greaves or what the fuck ever she means by this and trying to clean the set that way is destroying me

“Then you need to polish the chest plate, with a soft cloth, work in circles, going outward” okay yes but you’d do the cuirrass separate from the rest of the set and you’d do the inside too and cass ought to know the proper name for all of these pieces please it’s not hard

“The arms can be tricky because the joints” WHAT. for arms you’ve got, like, a pauldron (or spaulder and rondel), rerebrace, couter, vambrace, gauntlets. these are separate pieces. you clean them one at a time, inside and outside. does howland think you just… don’t need to clean the inside of a set of plate armor? does she think the inside isn’t just as if not more susceptible to rust as the outside? does… does she realize that you can take plate armor apart i am CONFOUNDED

WHAT is a “mouth cover” in this context. is she refering to a visor. hinged pieces like on an armet? does she mean a bevor? the bevor isn’t even part of the helmet aljksdflkjsfdj

cassandra refers to cuisses and greaves as “thigh plates” and “shin [plates]” respectively i’m die. she also completely skips the poleyns. i do not think this cass has ever cleaned a suit of plate armor in her entire life.

i am losing. my. mind.

- in the immediate aftermath of cass learning how to tread water i think rapunzel asks her more personal questions than she does in the entirety of tts itself. like, it’s almost jarring how much more interested both rapunzel and eugene are in cassandra as a person in this book than they seem to be in tts. compare this conversation to the way cass opens up to rapunzel in beginnings - here, it’s prompted by rapunzel asking questions, expressing interest in cassandra’s feelings and encouraging her by telling her she’s brave. in beginnings, rapunzel builds a pillow fort in cass’s room because she wants to force a bonding moment and cass, after initially trying to kick her out, relents and volunteers some personal information as a kind of apology for being hostile. the vibes are completely different, so different that it feels like i’m not even reading about the same characters.

- like can you imagine tts rapunzel saying something like “it’s your story, that makes it important” to cass? lmao

- cass reveals that she’s afraid of water because she got dragged out by the undertow at the beach when she was small, and her dad saved her and then got so mad at her that she remembers being as afraid of him as she was of the water. this is not unrealistic per se, but… if cassandra was as scared of her dad that day as she was of drowning, then… shouldn’t that have more of an impact on her relationship with him? like…he screams at her after she almost drowns and she walks away with this debilitating phobia of the water but zero lingering fear of him?

- this chapter has given me a headache

- re: romance novel: “Rapunzel gripped my hand. This time I didn’t flinch.” snrk.

#lost lagoon reread #rta #cassunzel #i know it's juv fic i KNOW but i -#the plate armor thing it kills me

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nobody-wants-ice-cream · 4 years

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Everything Wrong With The Umbrella Academy. Episode 3, Extra Ordinary.

We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals

Run Boy Run

Usual disclaimer: This is all in good fun! I wanted to do a really nitpicky re-watch of the series and found some really cool and interesting things I didn’t notice before. This is meant to have a Cinema Sins-esque tone. However, I did take off a lot more sins than Cinema Sins would have because I do genuinely like the series and the people that made it possible. So all of the good things got one sin off and all the bad things got one sin added. This is a really long post, so grab some popcorn. If there’s anything that I missed, feel free to add it!

Vanya was clearly about to sell her violin. She looked dejected and sad and was detached from her violin case. This is in character for Vanya on her pills, who must have decided that she wasn’t good enough at one point. Sin for putting Vanya through trauma. +1

The Umbrella Academy comics are priced weirdly. The one on the right is $25.00 and the one on the left is $15.00. What makes the one on the right more expensive? It even says on the cover that the one on the right was supposed to be $0.50. So why the inflation? Taking a closer look, all six heroes are on the cover, so it’s not that either of them are pre-Five leaving and therefore more expensive because Five is on both of them. Though, the one on the right does have a picture of Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, Ben, and Reginald under where it says that the comic is 50 cents. To make a long rant short, the comics that Vanya looks at in the pawn shop window are confusing. +1

However, Gabriel Ba’s art. -1

The strange lack of technology means that Vanya’s book was written on a typewriter. +1

Vanya needed 6 pencils to write her book with. These are maybe supposed to symbolize Vanya’s 6 siblings, in which case, interesting detail, but still. Six pencils. As opposed to one pencil and a pencil sharpener? Why all the tools Vanya? +1

The six pencils (with two pointer up) symbolize Vanya’s six siblings, two of which turned around since the siblings they are supposed to represent (Five and Ben) are no longer around. -1

Vanya’s dying houseplant. Water that! +1

Vanya collects another houseplant and it looks relatively healthy. -1

The messy table garbage still has the same plate and same crumpled papers/napkins in the same position. Either Vanya was super lazy, or the set designer/director was. +1

Vanya replaced the dying houseplant with the fresh one. Poor houseplant. I will mourn you. +1

“Lost Woman” has some really on the nose lyrics. Playing the phrase “lonely woman” before Vanya starts narrating her book is ridiculously on the nose. +1

However, “Lost Woman” happens to be one of my favorite tracks from the series. -1

Luther should be part ape in this scene, (as it takes place five years ago, not seven), but he looks completely normal. This is a massive continuity error so I’m adding two sins. +2

“Starved for attention” is the line Vanya narrates over Allison reading it. On. The. Nose. +1

Diego is so pissed off at Vanya that he tapes her likeness to a punching bag and punches it. You know, like a rational adult. +1

Klaus is wearing birkenstocks and burgundy capris. +1

Also, Ben and Klaus work together to read a book. -1

But I have to ask, why did the rehab let Klaus read during group therapy. And shush his dead brother’s ghost. +1

Ben is pissed off by the line “and haunted by what might have been.” On the nose. +1

Five reads the harsh line “we all wanted to be loved by a man incapable of giving love” while next to Dolores, who is also incapable of giving love because she is a mannequin. Also, Five reads this book, full of vitriol and hate, as the last connection he has to his siblings, at age thirteen. +2

Reginald doesn’t read the book that his daughter wrote. As usual, Reggie is a dick to Vanya. +1

Vanya’s reaction to being late to rehearsal is so relatable. I swear I have done this a thousand times as a musician. -1

The Netflix captions (yes I watch with captions) say “Chamber music playing”. They have a conductor. +1

The conductor has the character of all conductors. Dick. +1

Vanya isn’t vibrating when the rest of the orchestra is. Late or not, you still need to follow the concertmaster, Vanya. +1

The rainy weather matching Vanya’s stormy mood. Foreshadowing. -1

Badass umbrella title screen. -1

However, why are all those people stopping in the street? It’s raining, get to where you’re going! +1

Allison and Luther watch the tape where Reggie dies over and over. This is weird, even if they are trying to figure out if Grace killed him. Who would want to watch someone die over and over? Not even I want to replay Reggie dying, and I genuinely hate him. +1

Luther says that Reggie thought people were out to get him. On the first watch, the audience can chalk this up to Reggie being a paranoid old man, however on the second watch we know that the Commission exists and that Reggie is probably not from this world. So either of those groups could have been out to get him. But who? This remains a sin until they explain it. +1

Training posters in the kitchen. The kitchen! Really, Reggie. +1

There’s this weird caterpillar thing with a face behind Grace in this scene. What the hell is that? +1

There was also a radio in the kitchen, which implies that Reggie either let them listen to tunes, or had training cassettes the same way he had training records. Either way, what the hell, Reggie? +1

There is a ridiculous amount of light sources in this one room. +1

Grace has a cactus full of toothpicks or skewers by the stove. Cute art project, whichever kid but likely Diego based on his fascination with pointy things. -1

The “your father was a great man” speech. Poor Grace. +1

Jordan Clare Robbins is an excellent actress. -1

Smiley face made of two eggs and a strip of bacon. -1

Diego doesn’t understand the chain of custody regarding evidence. Patch says that if he touches a piece of evidence, she can’t use it in her case. How many murderers have walked free because of Diego? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha use bullets from 1963. Dallas foreshadowing? Remains a sin until season two confirms the Dallas plot. +1

These bullets were found on the random local hires Five killed at Griddy’s. Why does the Commission use bullets from the early 60’s? Isn’t that a big red flag to their time organization? +1

Patch indulges Diego the Vigilante by asking for his help. You’re a police officer, you got this, Patch. Also, this foreshadows her death when she does things his way and gets killed for it. +1

Diego tells Patch to investigate Five. Oh, the irony. +1

“I do give a shit” is such a weird line to try to portray as romantic with the music, tone, and lighting, show. +1

Beeman, unprofessionally, brings up the fact that Patch and Diego used to date while at a crime scene. +1

Vanya washes her hands for two seconds and then goes to talk to Helen. Almost like that was the real reason why she was in there. +1

Vanya attempts to compliment Helen Cho, who is overall, not interested. Is this Vanya’s repressed way of flirting? Pick a better time.+1

Seriously, what is with Vanya and starting conversations at the absolute worst time. It’s like she wants to get insulted. +1

No way in hell would one professional musician to another be this bitchy, Helen Cho. +1

Helen straight up calls Vanya talentless. What an awful thing to say! +1

She softens, as if she just gave Vanya legitimate career advice, but she didn’t. She really just insulted the time and effort Vanya put into her instrument. As a musician, I can confirm that what Helen just said is the equivalent of saying something really, really nasty. Tumblr hate anons have nothing on what Helen just said. +3

Vanya takes a pill after being called talentless. Pill foreshadowing. -1

Cha Cha uses a curling iron to cauterise the wound Five gave her from the shovel. Where did the curling iron come from? +1

“The entire fate of the universe” oh Hazel. Thanks for the irony. +1

How did no one in the history of this shady motel notice the hidden panel? You would think at least one person attempting to have shower sex or someone cleaning or someone doing matinence should have noticed that, right? +1

Five stitches up his wound by himself despite the fact that multiple people are in the house that are capable. He’s going to pull a few of those based on the angle. Also, Five didn’t bother to clean the blood off his arm, so who knows if he bothered to sterilize the needle or his hands or anything. +1

The wound on Cha Cha and the wound on Five are eerily similar. However, what makes them interesting is that Cha Cha decided to cauterize where Five decided to stitch. Both are decent methods, but Cha Cha’s way is going to leave severe permanent scarring and Five’s way might heal. This could foreshadow the way they treat the end of the world. Cha Cha wants to end it, Five wants to fix it. Maybe not Cha Cha herself, but she does represent the Commission and their ideals. She is a stickler for their rules and uses her last moments to try to call them and get rescued. Point is. This is an English teacher moment full of symbolism, and I respect the show for this choice. -1

Billy the Choo Choo bandages. First of all, Five can never get away from the childishness of his current form. Second of all, Reggie let Five have “Billy the Choo Choo” licenced bandages??? +1

Or, Five chose to buy/steal these bandages. +1

Five puts a clean, white uniform shirt over blood that he still hasn’t cleaned up. At this point, that has got to be uncomfortably sticky. +1

Five didn’t bother to clean his wound until morning. “I guess I’ll go to sleep and bleed”???+1

Or, it took Five several hours to get the supplies. Bullshit. No way in hell did Reggie not have those supplies lying around. +1

Five still chooses to wear the full uniform ensemble even though he could at the very least get rid of the tie. +1

The teleporting kid gets the fire escape bedroom. It’s like Reggie was begging Five to sneak out of the house. +1

Dumpster Bagel: Do Not Eat. +1

“I’m done funding your drug habit” you never did in the first place? You didn’t pay him at all for that magnificent acting?? Unless Five did this before he left the mansion, in which case, Five funded Klaus’s drug habit. +1

Justin Min looks so incredibly creepy sitting on the dumpster. He has such a blank expression. Also, when did he move from the fire escape? +1

“I love you. Even if you can’t love yourself!” is a great line. -1

When Five drives away in the stolen van, he passes an absolutely bewildered guy. How the hell did Five function as an assassin? He can’t do subtlety. This contradicts “I know how to do everything”. +1

Was Aidan Gallagher actually driving in this scene? Because it kind of looks like the way a beginner would drive. This also contradicts “I know how to do everything” +1

There’s a lady passing Meritech that actually chose to wear a baby pink fedora. M’costume. +1

Five left his wife stuck in a bag and didn’t remember her. +1

He also left a bottle of some clear liquor on top of her. +1

“This is the place that it was made. Or will be made.” The delivery on this line was kinda bad. +1

Allison used her power on Claire. Claire was three years old. No matter which way you slice it, this is the shittiest thing Allison has ever done. She’s working on it, but the fact that it happened deserves a sin. +1

Emmy Raver-Lampman is a kick ass actress. -1

Allison has the most warranted case of impostor syndrome ever. Sin off because this is the one of the few scenes where two characters actually talk about their emotions. -1

Luther and Allison had that conversation sitting ridiculously far apart. +1

Leonard’s shop is called “Imperial Woodwares” Apparently, he delivers as well. How did Leonard get the business and woodworking skills necessary for running a relatively successful shop while in prison? +1

Leonard somehow knows that Vanya’s orchestra (which rehearses and performs in the Icarus Theatre) is far from Bricktown. At this point, he shouldn’t know that unless that is the only orchestra in the entire city. There is no way that that is the only orchestra in the entire city. +1

Leonard took up wood carving in prison. Is that allowed? +1

If a guy you just met makes a wood carving in your likeness you should run. Run like hell. Get a restraining order. That is so creepy. Obvious villain is obvious. +1

Also, I once read a fanfic (The Moon Laughs by Lady_Origami on ao3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/17959847/chapters/42417584) where a character is kidnaped by Leonard and tortured in this backroom where he’s showing Vanya the creepy statue. I can see where the inspiration came from. This back room has “place to keep the person I kidnaped and torture them” vibes.+1

Leonard stayed up all night to make the creepy woodcarving. He then insists that Vanya take it. And Vanya doesn’t recognize the creepy vibes. +1

And she does take it! +1

Leonard says that he made the carving for her and that she inspired him. Obvious manipulation is obvious. +1

Leonard is a dick to Vanya by using Allison’s successful career. +1

Leonard doesn’t like the Beatles. +1

Why did Allison go to Bricktown to find Vanya when that is nowhere near the theatre or Vanya’s apartment? Was she just wandering around hoping to find Vanya? +1

Allison is the Queen of actually talking out her thoughts and feelings. She just apologized to Vanya and explained why she was so angry in the last episode. Well done. I respect that. -1

Allison and Vanya sisterly bonding. -1

Five sees children playing and then immediately starts having an apocalypse flashback. This shows that Five lost his childhood as soon as he time traveled to the apocalypse. I’m sad now. +1

Aidan Gallagher plays this really well. -1

If you look closely, you can see Five/Aidan Gallagher laughing at Luther/Tom Hopper because he can’t fit in the van. I can’t tell if Five is laughing at Luther or if Aidan is laughing at Tom. Either way, that slaps. -1

However, corpsing. +1

No one has written Klaus/Dolores fanfic yet. They really hit it off in the van, y’all. +1

Five throws an empty can at Klaus for messing with Dolores. +1

Klaus’s expression after Five says “does it matter, it’s Klaus.” Sinning because Five is a dick to Klaus. +1

“Did I ever tell you about the time I tried to wax my ass with chocolate pudding. It was so painful.” I love this line. God bless Robert Sheehan. -1

Aidan Gallagher contemplates this line then starts corpsing. I don’t blame him. I’ve been trying to figure out how that would be possible too. -1

How can you use chocolate pudding to wax any hair? +1

Aidan Gallagher laughs at this line, meaning Five found this funny, but didn’t want to give Klaus the satisfaction of laughing. +1

Luther and Five are dicks to Klaus. They kicked him out of the van! Assholes. +1

Luther is sort of trying to connect with Five, but he fails miserably because it comes out really condescending. +1

“I don’t think that I’m better than you, Number One. I know I am.” Hubris much, Five? +1

Luther is already sick of Five’s “I’m better than you, I’ve done things you couldn’t comprehend” schtick and Five has only been back for three days. And we make fun of Luther’s moon thing. We get it, Five, you’re a badass. Actions speak louder than words, old man. +1

On the side of the Variety Store Klaus steals from is a billboard for Clever Crisp Cereal, which is the cereal that Reggie invented in the comics. I guess he did that here too. -1

Also, Klaus steals from the Variety Store and drops everything while running away. Why did you steal so much shit if you knew you were going to drop it all Klaus? +1

Ben’s reaction to this buffoonery must have been hilarious. Sinning the show for not showing us that. +1

“Now I’m starting to wonder if that was the wisest decision.” What? Kicking Klaus out of the van or Klaus deciding to rob the store? Because both were pretty stupid. +1

Does Agnes own Griddy’s? +1

Agnes just gave some valuable baking tips when it comes to doughnuts. Thanks, Agnes. -1

Agnes and Hazel are really cute together. -1

The Hazel and Agnes theme is my favorite instrumental piece from the whole show. -1

There are still bullet holes in the walls. Attention to detail! -1

Hazel and Cha Cha pretend to be social workers or private detectives concerned for Five’s well being. Oh, the irony. +1

“I mean who lets a kid get a tattoo” Reginald Hargreeves. That’s who. +12

Agnes is indignant about Five’s tattoo, citing his age. This whole episode has a ridiculous amount of irony. +1

Agnes draws the umbrella tattoo a bit too perfectly for someone who only saw it once and at the wrong angle. +1

Diego straight up threatens Luther at knifepoint. +1

This family meeting is a complete shitshow. +1

The monocle is likely to become a s2 plotpoint because Diego put it in a place where anyone could take it. If you’ve read the comics, you know why I think that’s important, but I won’t spoil it for anyone who hasn’t. Either way, that was a dumb way to dispose of the monocle, Diego. +1

Diego is a dick to Vanya until she agrees with him. +1

They are legitimately talking about killing their mother. What the fuck. +1

Klaus references the van when only Luther, Five, and presumably Ben know about it. This makes no sense. +1

Votes to kill Mom: Luther, Allison, Ben +3

Klaus hisses at Ben and no one thinks this is weird. +1

Grace definitely heard Luther and Allison voting to kill her. After she made them breakfast too! Luther and Allison are dicks in this scene. (And so is Ben but Grace couldn’t hear him.) +2

Grace tries to prove her worth by making cookies. Fuck Luther, Allison, and Ben for voting to turn her off. +3

Diego and Vanya actually have a civil conversation. Well done for doing the bare minimum, Diego? -1

Vanya’s pills suggest that she was friendlier with Diego at some point. +1

Pogo for sure saw that whole thing and he saw Vanya take the pills. Dr. Complicit. +1

Reginald is a total soccer mom in Diego’s flashback scenes. This amuses me. -1

However, Reginald raised six child soldiers as “crime deterrents” so +6

Luther is casually working out in his bedroom while the mission alarm is going off. +1

“Where’s my knives” was a phrase Diego practiced. Also, Diego would never lose his knives. +1

Vanya’s room is a fucking closet. +1

“Thank you, Mother” Dante Albidone is a treasure. -1

“Boys will be boys” this is the only time that phrase is acceptable. When you’re putting out a fire your son caused for no reason. -1

“You did it! I’m so proud of you!” -1

Reginald interrupts this. +2

Diego’s flashbacks were very unorganized, which makes sense. This is probably several years worth of mission flashbacks. -1

“It’s okay if you hated him” “I would understand if you wanted to hurt him”-2

David Castaneda and Jordan Claire Robbins nailed this scene. Two kick ass actors being incredible. -1

Did Five really sit there all day with no breaks? +1

Five is arguing with Dolores and losing. She is a manifestation of his subconscious. And she is winning this argument. +1

Aidan Gallagher looked directly into the camera. We made eye contact. It was weird. +1

Lance straight up sells those illegal prosthetics where anyone could see it. Lance is an idiot. +1

Agnes’s drawing led Hazel and Cha Cha to the Academy. +1

Cha Cha left the window down in the car. +1

Would that air thing actually work? If it wouldn’t then sin on Reggie for getting cheap locks. If it would, sin on me for not getting better locks sooner. +1

Hazel and Cha Cha don’t have their masks on. What if somebody saw them? +1

The portrait of Five comes back to bite the Academy in the ass. Why haven’t they gotten rid of it? Five has been back for three days. +1

Klaus has black nail polish on his toes. -1

No way in hell is Klaus able to have his eyes open in a soapy bathtub. +1

The ghosts are creepy. Sin because Klaus is traumatized. +1

“We’re Through” by the Hollies is one of my favorite songs to play on guitar. It’s a decent coffee shop piece and I like playing it live. Thank you show, for helping me discover it. -1

Klaus is taking a bath with the door open. +1

Luther has been eating his Wheaties, Cha Cha. If you call experimental ape drugs, Wheaties. +1

Luther describing sunrise on the moon. I like this bit of writing. -1

Where were Hazel and Cha Cha keeping their guns and masks? Special pockets? +1

Diego is the only person who could possibly bring knives to a gun fight and win. Diego is a badass. -1

Hazel and Cha Cha continue to have stormtrooper aim. There are so many times when either could have shot Diego, but magically miss because Diego has plot armor. +1

Reginald’s portrait gets shot though. Right in some lethal areas. This amuses me. -1

Grace is so out of it she doesn’t notice heavy gunfire. Reggie, you suck. +1

“Who the hell are these guys?”/”Who the hell are these people?” +1

Diego, Luther and Allison just saved your ass. Less arguing, more fighting the crazy people. +1

Reggie keeps convenient weapons everywhere like they’re lamps. +1

Vanya is still in the Academy hours after the meeting, and she doesn’t think to hide during all this crazy gunfire and fighting. Sigh. +1

Seriously, it’s like she’s trying to get killed. +1

But she doesn’t because she has plot armor. +1

“Hey, asshole” goes back to Five’s “hey, assholes” from episode one. So did Luther learn that from Five, did Five learn that from Luther, or did Reggie decide that that was an acceptable phrase to teach his children? I lowkey want to write all three in a crackfic. Nice. -1

Vanya probably has a concussion. Otherwise, she would have attempted to run, right? Please tell me she isn’t that stupid. +1

You know that b99 meme where shit is going down and Gina is just chilling with her headphones. Yeah. That. Klaus, get some situational awareness, please. Also, what are these magic noise cancelling headphones that can block out the sound of gunfire and where can I buy them? +1

Allison, I understand why you don’t want to rumor anyone, but your life is literally in danger. I think you can forgive yourself if you rumor Hazel and Cha Cha into not killing you and your family. +1

“You wanna rumor this psycho?” “I don’t need to because this bitch just pissed me off” These are both horrible lines. I can’t tell if it’s because of the writers or because of the actors, but both of these lines are genuinely terrible. +1

“We just want the boy”. Nice comics reference, Cha Cha. -1

Diego doesn’t attempt to fight Cha Cha and give Allison the upper hand. He just sort of stands there. What the hell, Diego? +1

And when he does fight her, he doesn’t use any long range weapons. Diego, this is your house. I’m assuming you know where the knife drawer is? +1

Ben attempts to give Klaus privacy. In this situation. That’s a sin. I would risk seeing my brother’s naked body if it meant he wouldn’t be shot. Just sayin’, Ben. Get all up in his face. Put your ghost hands through his head. Get his attention! +1

Luther and Hazel can go hand to hand as equals and the show never addresses why. +1

Vanya really is that stupid. There are plenty of doors. And the fire escape from Five’s room. Vanya, run!+1

Luther had plenty of time to get out of the way of the chandaller. Why didn’t he shove his siblings and follow one of them? The motion would have made sense. +1

This ape reveal makes no sense. It would have worked in episode one, but it’s weird in episode 3. Why didn’t they reveal this to the audience earlier? +1

The dinosaur footprint sound effect. +1

Why didn’t Vanya and Allison hear Grace humming? Also, why didn’t anyone hear Hazel and Cha Cha breaking in. It was established in episode one that there is no soundproofing. +1

Grace is cross stitching the moon exploding. Foreshadowing. -1

She is pulling the needle through her own hand though. +1

Who gave Grace that nice bracelet? That’s so adorable. -1

Diego killed his own mother. +1

However, it is a mercy kill. Who knows what Luther or Allison would have done to her if they had found out how screwed up Grace was. I’m really conflicted about this scene. On one hand, fridging, on the other, it makes sense. Therefore, it’s a wash. -1

What is this magic cloth that Allison gives Vanya to mop up the blood and where can I get it? Seriously, it cleans up blood ridiculously well. To the point where it doesn’t look like Vanya’s been injured. +1

Diego takes out his anger/sadness/frustration on Vanya. Also, Diego would be excellent at cinema sins. Vanya could have been killed and she was stupid to stay, but there is no reason to raise your voice at her like that, Diego. +1

“She is a liability”. And you are an asshole. Diego just said that line to Allison as if Vanya wasn’t even there. As if she was just some inanimate burden. Fuck Diego for this line. +1

Allison doesn’t even attempt to defend Vanya. Even if Diego made a good point, there is no reason to let him get away with that kind of emotional abuse. +1

The show kind of addresses Luther’s body image issues, but doesn’t let him talk about it. +1

When did Vanya get Leonard’s address? +1

“I didn’t know where else to go”. Home perhaps? To your apartment? And not into the arms of creepy Leonard? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha didn’t discuss what to do if shit went sideways. No wonder Five was better than them. +1

When would Hazel have kidnaped Klaus? We don’t see it happen so we should just assume that Klaus appeared there magically? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha have FRC 891 as a licence plate. Neverending Chaos. Google FRC 891 Umbrella Academy. -1

Overall Review:

I forgot just how important episode three really is. Here we learn just how harmful Vanya’s book was, that Vanya is in an orchestra, and more about Leonard. This episode carves out who Vanya is as a character before Leonard sinks his claws into her. We can see the effects of the pills on her ability to connect with others and her ability to play the violin.

We also get a lot from the other characters. The Claire reveal is a big one for Allison. So is the ape reveal for Luther, even if it should have happened two episodes ago.

As for acting shout outs, Emmy Raver-Lampman and Jordan Claire Robbins killed it in this episode. I can’t wait to see more of Emmy in s2 and I really hope that Jordan will return.

There was some excellent use of irony in this episode. Like a lot of irony. What killed me was the Griddy’s scene. Hazel and Cha Cha pretending to care about Five’s well being so they can murder him and Agnes being indignant about someone as young as Five getting a tattoo is just amazing.

As for plot things, this was really a Vanya-centric episode. It establishes a lot of things about her, which makes the twist at the end even more obvious. This is not my first, second, or even third rewatch, so I know what’s coming, but how did I not see it before? When I first watched it I thought that Five was the main character and that Vanya was a self-insert. Looking back, I can see that Five and Vanya had pretty equal backstory and screen time given to them. You could make the argument that they are the main characters. You could even argue that they’re the primary protagonist and antagonist, but to be frank, that discussion should be saved for episode 10.

Total: 133

Sentence: Eating a dumpster bagel.

#The Umbrella Academy #all in good fun #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #Allison Hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #Grace Hargreeves #leonard peabody #hazel and cha cha

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cardassiangf · 5 years

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okay actually let me just do the top three placements for the ds9 crew, okay? okay here we go! these are just for fun & also my interpretation. also i realize some arent human and therefore would have different placements entirely, but you know what? idc. (and no ezri since i havent seen enough of her to make a good guess sfdgfhjh sorry!)

julian i already said was a cancer sun virgo moon. workaholics who are kinda anxious but also full of love and affection, plus they also love to talk. for rising im kind of caught between aries and sagittarius, because they both in nicely with the top two. i am leaning more towards aries rising though for him. moves very fast to keep interest in things & is career minded. it’s kind of a combination that swings back and forth between this unflappable confidence (usually in the workplace) and a deep emotional vulnerability. also, they’re caregivers by nature. his childhood teddy bear was his ‘first patient,’ and that has to mean something. he also repeatedly shows himself to be drawn to people that might be in need of ‘fixing,’ and might not necessarily pull back until something shakes him out of it. julian is someone who buzzes with energy and feels so much at once it can be hard to reign in, but once he actually manages to do that, it’s almost unstoppable.

for sisko im feeling gemini sun and scorpio moon. okay yes two signs with a bad rep for some reason but hear me out: this person is extremely charming, confident & elegant except when they're Not, there's intense confidence and resolve that comes through. and on that intensity, we’ve all seen sisko when he gets serious about something--it’s a Lot. it’s a combo that can also be thrown off kilter and that’s not a great thing, but sisko has an excellent support system to ground him so you don’t see the negativity. he’s also a pisces rising. the same intensity comes out in love and emotional intelligence with him here, he’s definitely someone in touch with that side of himself and that’s very Water Sign of him. so basically loving, protective, the type of person people get drawn too for one reason or another but also there’s a chaotic side to him too, and he’s got a flair for the dramatic (his escapades in the mirrorverse come to mind when i think about this.)

jadzia... okay see my initial reaction is to just. fill her chart with fire. she’s a big personality on the surface, and extremely magnetic. but actually? leo sun pisces moon. okay yeah, a fire sign out from the gate but hear me out. there’s a lot of duality in jadzia, and while she outwardly shows a ton of confidence, she’s also pretty self reflective and i get the sense she much prefers to deal with her problems internally. like, people don’t really see much past her dazzling outside either, and as another leo sun, people do tend to write us off as a bit one dimensional at times. the known emotional sensitivity of the pisces mized with leo’s capacity to love is good for her i think. rising is a bit tricky, since jadzia also has dax to blend her personality with, but i think that virgo rising suits her well. for all of the fun she brings to the table, she also has a brilliant streak of practicality.

kira is another instinctively ‘oh, fire sign!’ person but actually? i think she has a ton of water in her chart. she’s emotional and passionate and so devoted to the things and people she believes in, and maybe she isn’t used to paying attention to her emotions because the occupation didn’t let her, but she feels so deeply. for this reason, pisces sun sagittarius moon scorpio rising. the thing about kira is that she might hold a lot of anger, but most of it stems from love and protectiveness. she’s incredibly blunt and adaptable, and definitely one of those pisces who doesn’t actually want to admit they have anything in common with the other water signs lmao. she’s at her best when she’s around people who can ground her and kind of make her pause to evaluate things before jumping into action and seriously values the bonds she makes with people. she also doesn’t really care for staying still or playing political mind games and would much prefer to just jump into the Doing phase of things.

quark is just. it took me a minute for him actually? idk he’s a bit of a weird one. for quark, he’s kind of dramatic and emotional but also has this wonderfully deviant side and, when it comes down to it, isn’t terrible at business negotiations at all. yes he has majorly fucked up some big opportunities, but also somehow has kept his bar running for what, 15? 20 years? through everything that’s happened on ds9. quark is a capricorn sun, but it’s balanced out (or in conflict with) his aquarius moon and leo rising. quark is weird, and kind of a dick sometimes, but when he’s not trying to be a menace, he actually has a pretty good heart. he’s a pretty creative thinker and constantly finds new ways to use practical knowledge to his advantage. but he also likes to ‘outshine’ others and keep the spotlight on himself, and he’ll lie and trample over people to do so. the fact that this combo makes him attentive can be a bit of a double-edged sword; sure, he can listen to people when he feels like it, but what’s going to happen with that knowledge? who knows. not quark until he finds an opportunity for it at least.

odo! does not technically have a birthday but who cares i love him so he’s here. yes, we will start obviously: virgo sun. what else would i go with. he’s a reserved person with a personality that errs on the side of uptight; very virgo stereotypical. but you know what else? aries moon. oh yes. odo walks into a room and as long as he wants you to know he’s there, you Will know. he’s bold in his own way, and extremely on top of details with intense attentiveness. of course there’s some fire in his chart, and probably a lot of it in other placements too. his gemini rising helps this out immensely, which is kinda surprising. but also when gemini is ascendant with virgo in sun, it makes them meticulous, fast learners. maybe a bit nitpicky at times, but nothing that can’t be helped with practice. i think the aries placement would also probably explain the underlying sensitivity, because like, it’s generally one of the louder signs of the zodiac but here’s a secret from anther fire sign: we are So sensitive oh my fucking god. we have a ton of ego and pride (and you can’t tell me odo doesn’t have moments of that) so typically unless we’re in a place we feel we can let go, you won’t see it, but jesus Fucking christ fire signs have a lot of emotion under the surface.

miles, who i just wanna lowkey take the piss out of and slap him with virgo/virgo/virgo but i will refrain lmao. no, for him, libra sun leo moon virgo rising. he’s extremely reliable, devoted to his work & friends & family even if he’s not the greatest at showing it? a bit emotionally constipated but he does try very hard and that’s why we love him. is it the placements or the fact that he’s an irish dad? who knows, but he’s very prone to just telling people things outright with nothing to cushion it. this can be good or bad, and seems to depend more on how well the other person knows him. his leo side makes him pretty warm when he’s comfortable, and i think his relationship with keiko actually paints him as a lowkey traditional romantic too. also, these placements make for really good parents, and we don’t see it as much as we see the jake/sisko father/son dynamic, but miles really does do his best for his kids.

worf my boy, who i have loved dearly since i first saw tng. hard to make a guess for him im 100% happy with though. im decently satisfied with taurus sun leo moon scorpio rising. worf is just like. he doesn’t have a really big personality but you also are very aware of him? i wouldn’t say he’s stoic by any means, he’s just very. focused. he’s honest and tries his best to look at situations from a more lawful standpoint, or at least, one that makes the most sense with his own honour code. he seems drawn to stability, but also finds himself drawn to people who challenge him too? he’s out here looking for something to balance him out and put things in perspective for him. whether or not he takes that into consideration is another thing entirely. and i say scorpio because, you know what they say, still water runs deep. you might know what he’s thinking because he told you, but you might not know how he Feels about it. actually, you probably will not. the leo doesn’t really make him want to be in the spotlight or anything, in his case i think it acts more like his driving force.

and listen. i know garak isn't crew. but i love him so he’s here and we’re all gonna like it. this chaotic little bastard spy is an aquarius sun pisces moon capricorn rising. garak is unique, and even if he doesn’t want to say it, he’s pretty ruled by his emotions too. he’s creative, and a grade-A manipulator who can charm his way just about anywhere (provided of course, the person in question isn’t someone who’s been warned about him, but even then, he has a good chance). he’s good a good, if not a bit Off, sense of humour and he comes off as someone who has a personal interest in the behaviour of people. not just a spy thing, but he’s invested--he does crave a certain intimacy and closeness which gets denied uh. most of his life actually. the capricorn read comes from how he’s been able to compartmentalize and commit acts of cruelty. an interrogation that was four hours of staring and not speaking is certainly creative. it’s also an insanely calculated and sadistic mind game for him. and it’s interesting to note that as much as he manipulates, he’s also very easily manipulated himself (see: Everything about tain jesus fuck i hate that man so much). he also runs into quite a bit of trouble when he’s not able to compartmentalize things any longer, whether it’s because the emotional toll is too high or he simply doesn’t see the point in the actions any longer.

#ds9 #star trek #star trek deep space 9 #long post #WHEW

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comickergirl · 6 years

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I’ve got a pretty big soft spot for Kara’s Daring New Adventures costume, with the shorts and choker. What do you think about that one? And what are your ranking of Supergirl costumes?

I am a HUGE FAN of Kara’s look in Daring New Adventures. Definitely one of my favorite costumes.

I’ve got a few posts about various Supergirl costumes, but I don’t think I’ve ever actually ranked them! So I’ll give it a shot. XD

Okay, so here it is: Supergirl Costumes, RANKED, from the Least Favorite to HECK YEAH!*

*DISCLAIMERS BEFORE WE BEGIN: Obviously this stuff is subjective, so my list is probably going to be different that other folks’ lists, and so on and so forth. Personally, I value simple, effective designs that are both functional and…oh, what’s a good word. They’re superhero costumes. Like, sure, you could probably get the same stuff done in a Kevlar vest and cargo pants, but there isn’t really a ton of flair to be had when you go the practical route

And bonus points if the costume reflects the character’s personality/disposition, and has a story reason for existing.

Also I don’t think I’ve got EVERY DESIGN, EVER, for any and all Karas in the multiverse, because this post is ALREADY crazy long; we need not make it longer. XD

OKAY, so now that that’s done, LET’S GO:

25. Brainwashed Apokolips Supergirl

Proof that ‘adding pants’ won’t always solve your costume problems.

24. Dark Supergirl

So, here’s the thing: I love the black and silver Superman costume. LOVE. IT. So it should follow that I love the Supergirl variation, right? …Well. Sometimes, a design that would otherwise be ‘just fine’ is pushed into ‘oh God, please no,’ by 1.) a terrible story surrounding said design and 2.) really weird, sexualized artwork. Such is the case with our dear friend Dark Supergirl. Which is why it sits so low on the list. (And for those curious, yes, the blue equivalent also sits down here as well, because there’s just. A lot about this era that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.)

23. Flamebird

Another design brought low by being wrapped up with a terrible story. (I think I dislike the Kandor plot more than the Dark Supergirl plot, actually.) This feels over-designed and like it’s trying way too hard to be edgy. Less ‘edgy’ than Apokolips Girl up there, but. Close.

22. New 52

This isn’t awful in theory but that red…er…plate? kinda ruins the whole thing. Some artists did their best to make the plate look more like the equivalent of Clark’s trunks, but at it’s worst it’s just an awkward patch that looks even more awkward from a variety of angles. (And it’s BRIGHT RED so it distracts you from the other, more effective areas of the design. NOT GREAT, BOB. NOT GREAT.)

21. Bombshells

Look this one is absolutely a personal taste thing, I’ve just never been into the pin-up aesthetic.

20. Superman: The Animated Series

I dunno, this design just never really worked for me. It’s not bad–in fact, it’s really simple and clean, but. *shrugs* Maybe it’s just too much a departure from what I generally associate with the Superman ‘family’ of costumes. Also, the gloves always make me think of like. Loony Tunes and Mickey Mouse. (But I love the boots, guys. Those are great.) (I didn’t include her later JLU costume on this list, but know that I like it a lot.)

19. Justice League 3001

Not a huge fan of the color blocking for this look. The crest is cool, but. The shapes don’t really mesh well, IMO.

18. 70s Hot pants

I like 50% of this costume! As we will see shortly! But that remaining 50% really kills it, man. The way the shorts/hot pants are drawn, they just end up looking like really uncomfortable underwear.

17. Cyborg Supergirl

I’m just not a mech/tech armor person. Lot of plating and circuitry…kinda starts to look too busy and you lose the cooler design elements. (But there’s a story reason for it! So it does get some points in that regard!)

16. Red Lantern

Weird color blocking/shape language strikes again! Not a fan of the knees and torso. (But! It ranks way higher than the new 52 because it makes the plate into an actual full piece of clothing. Improvement!) Mask is really cool. And the sleeves.

15. Elseworld’s Finest

Honestly it’s not a bad design. Pretty simple and slick. Mostly, it’s just kinda plain. I like the way the cape attaches to the main portion, and the boots!

14. Crucible Academy

A bit more streamlined that the Cyborg look. Not at all a bad design. But again. Just not into the mech armor take.

13. DC Superhero Girls

I actually really like this? I mean, she’s adorable? But I don’t quite understand the shirt. Is it a polo? Sweater vest? A sweater vest on TOP of a polo? IDK, it’s a mystery.

12. Gotham City Garage

Belly shirt feels a little dated, but otherwise, I dig it.

11. 1984 Movie Costume

HONESTLY, FRIENDS. ALL THINGS CONSIDERED…IT’S A SMALL MIRACLE THAT THIS COSTUME LOOKS AS GOOD AS IT DOES. We’re starting to move towards my personal favorite look for Supergirl–it’s got all the right elements! But the belt’s not great, and the material–I mean it works but it’s a costume from a movie that’s three decades old. So it’s a touch dated.

10. Headband

So we’re at the point where a lot of these designs are gonna start to look similar so really I can only rank them based on nitpicky things. XD Like, I don’t love when the skirt comes to a point like that, and the way the pleating is drawn makes the skirt sort of…hang weird. (Yes I realize it’s ridiculous to talk about gravity affecting fabric in a DRAWING where neither of those things actually exist but here we are.) Overall though? The crest is nice and bold, the shape is cool, it works well with the rest of the outfit, and they are just LEANING INTO THAT HEADBAND. YOU GO, KARA. (Also heeeeeey STORY REASON FOR HEADBAND so you know what that means. BONUS POINTS.)

9. Matrix

Improves on the areas that I don’t personally dig on the Headband costume–belts and boots are GREAT. Skirt still comes to a point though. :/

8. Linda Danvers

This is why I can’t really take that Flamebird design seriously. You want your Supergirl to look edgy? DOESN’T GET EDGIER THAN FIRE WINGS, BRO.

7. Injustice 2

It’s a video game, so you’ve got SEAMS and WEIRD RANDOM DETAILS and SUPERFLUOUS DESIGN NONSENSE (see: the costume options for the metal thigh bands) but GIVEN that it’s a video game, this coulda gone so bad, bro. So credit where credit is due. XD Don’t like the gloves and bare arms, though.

6. Jamal Igle Update

They took a costume that was…causing problems, and they made it work. Really, really well.

5. Smallville Season 11

Okay, when they advertised this comic, and Kara’s costume, I was not into it. And then I read it, and LO AND BEHOLD, IT’S G8. The color blocking is KINDA CRAZY but remarkably, when you start drawing it in action? It just. It looks good.

4. Rebirth

IT’S JUST SO CLASSIC. (So why is it not in the top three? Because of that infernal skirt point, I tell ya.)

3. Silver Age

I mean they basically NAILED IT right out the GATE man. NOICE.

2. Daring New Adventures

The 80s fix the 50% I didn’t like in 70s look–there’s just something about adding those boots…I dunno man, it just MAKES IT WORK MUCH BETTER. I love this look. I love this era in the comics. I love Carmine Infantino’s art. LOTTA LOVE, IN THIS NUMBER 2 SPOT.

SO WHAT’S NUMBER ONE?

Oh come on, like you guys didn’t know. XD

1. TV Show Costume

Listen. Listen. A real human being puts this suit on–a human being subject to gravity and weather and REAL WORLD** SCENARIOS–and it’s not a train wreck. The silhouette is nice! The material is convincingly durable! There are little design elements that don’t overwhelm the overall look! The CAPE HANGS WELL AND LOOKS SO GOOD, GUYS. SO GOOD. The skirt does not come to that awkward point and the minimal pleating is well hidden by that front portion. The tights and boots help with the whole ‘flying around in a skirt’ thing by covering her legs completely, and the shirt is actually a leotard, so it’s comparable to stuff that dancers wear.

LOOKS GOOD.

WORKS WELL.

ALIGNS NICELY WITH KARA’S CHARACTER AND PERSONALITY.

SCREAMS: SUPER! AT THE TOP OF ITS PRIMARY COLORED LUNGS.

LETS FOLKS KNOW THAT YOU CAN ABSOLUTELY KICK BUTT AND TAKE NAMES IN A SKIRT.

So yes. It wins. Forever and always.

Honorable Mentions: Every single one of Kevin Wada and Cory J. Walker’s Supergirl designs.

#secretlyasummers #comicker replies #supergirl #costumes #comics talk #long post

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bicanthropus · 2 years

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ivy - dropped muse

╔═.✾. ═ LOG *** : pamela isley poison ivy | cis woman, she/her | 43.

Just spotted IVY around town. Our records show that they remember [ some things ] from their source : dc comics (new earth). They were first spotted in august 2021 and our best guess is that their last memory is selina revealing she manipulated ivy & harley into teaming up with her. Archivists watching them state that they still have the isolationist, near extinct plants, quick to temper, siren in the garden vibe about them.

━ from Armes E. Sallow’s personal archives. ═.✾. ═╝ ↳・゜jessica chastain .

━━━ transcribed on : 22 february 2022. transcription annotated by tal brennan, archivist. notation: the chime of a bell indicates that armes had to track ivy down, rather than her normal interview procedure.

You know, I would rather you not be in my shop.

ARMES: i’m here for

I know why you are here. I have gotten every letter, notice, and even phone call you have made to me, though I don’t know how you got my phone number.

ARMES: it is customary that every person in town comes in for an interview, so that we can add them to our records.

Darling, pull up my files and I’m sure you can find everything you need. I know Amanda Waller has a deeply enlightening one about me, though it does say I’m a Black Widow which is frightfully incorrect.

ARMES: then wouldn’t you rather you tell me about yourself, so the details are correct?

[for a moment, the only noise is the faint spray of a misting device] I suppose, though don’t expect me to answer everything.

ARMES: can you tell me your name and where you are from?

You can call me Ivy, and I’m from Gotham. I’m sure even you Brits have heard of Gotham.

ARMES: i’m welsh, not british.

Does it look like I care? Britisih Islanders if you must be so nitpicky.

ARMES: what is the last thing you remember from your home?

hmm I remember saving Harley from getting locked up in Arkham - again - and finding out that Selina had manipulated me and Harley into moving in with her by acting weaker than she was. I should be mad, but frankly I’m just impressed.

ARMES: do you often feel impressed when people do that to you?

Oh no, usually it gets them killed. But Harley and Selina are exceptions.

ARMES: We have a history of memory loss in town. do you feel as though you have any blanks in your memories?

I’ve had blanks in my memories for years, it’s nothing new. However, to answer your question, it doesn’t seem any worse than previously.

ARMES: how long have you been in town?

About six months, and in that time I’ve fixed up my own house and got my hands on this place.

ARMES: yes, on that - the previous owner of dwarven nursery has not responded to any of my calls. any idea what happened to him?

Oh I think he said something about settling down and living the rest of his life quietly. He said he’d just been waiting for someone like me to come along and take care of his store.

ARMES: right. what, do you think, was the strangest thing you saw before arriving in this town?

Myself, though I promise in a good way. I do love myself.

ARMES: do you believe in the supernatural or mythical?

[there’s silence, though armes noted after the fact that ivy turned her hand green as an answer.]

ARMES: right, my apologies. what kind of traits would your friends or family give you?

Seductive, charming, cunning. Passionate. Oh what was it that Harley would say? Something like ‘Bonnie and Clyde but from that one gay music video. And sexier’.

ARMES: well, thank you for your time.

❃゜・。. ・°゜

notes collected by tal brennan

Poison Ivy is a well known antagonist of Batman in the DC Comics. Though Ivy was not her birth name, it is the name she most commonly goes by unless under cover, and it is the name she is using in town, so it is the name I will be using. She has been around for a long time, and is one of the most recognizable Batman Villains. Though she started as a seductress and clearly the creation of a man’s wet dream, she has become an icon for women, especially sapphics, in the more recent years. Someone who has seen the horrors that many women face, and who has decided to get even - she has shifted from a man’s fantasy to a woman’s escape from today’s world.

It seems the Ivy we have gotten has come just out of the Gotham City Sirens run of comics, though it should be noted that comic timelines have never be consistent and we should not be relying on them.

The fact that Harley Quinn has showed up in town as well can either be very good for us, as Harley can keep her a bit more contained, or very bad if the two of them decide that they are tired of this town and the people in it.

danger rating: 9/10 likelihood to investigate: 3/10 unless armes gets under her skin

#✿ poison ivy ✿#❃゜・。. ・°゜sallow | prompts #sallow hills (intro)

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stimtoybox · 7 years

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Hi um, j don't wanna be a pain or anything but I thought I'd let you know that that textured metallic tangle you reblogged recently is actually pink, not purple as you stated in your post, it just looks purple in the lighting , Aaa sorry

I know you’re trying to do the right thing, anon. I know. But I burst into tears reading this ask.

I’m a disabled blogger with chronic hand pain and a resulting chronic spoon shortage. I’ve spent all day answering asks and HTML coding the three tags pages (if I don’t do this at least once a week, the job becomes massive) between other annoyances in my life and my own writing. I’ve got fifty seven Tumblr messages blinking at me on the side of my screen awaiting reading and responses (and I’m still not going to get to them today). I’ve got messages that have gone unresponded to for a few weeks now because I don’t have enough spoons to do everything. I’ve got hundreds of photos for my own reviews I don’t have the spoons to write. I wish I did, but I don’t.

I don’t want to be mean about this, because I know best intentions were meant, and if I come across as such, I’m so sorry. I would be incredibly grateful, though, if my followers can let some of the small, nitpicky details stand as wrong. So grateful. I will make mistakes and I need to be able to correct them, but when it comes down to debating over whether something is pink or purple, I‘d appreciate it if we could just quietly disagree and move on, you know? An incorrect price or a broken link needs fixing, yes, but I hope you’ll all forgive me if I don’t change an incorrect interpretation of the hue of an item.

I don’t want to upset or hurt people, and I don’t want the kind anon who sent this to go ignored, either. I know factual information is important to get right and I really appreciate the kind intent here.

But I cried, because I’m tired and I’m in pain and having someone point out that the Tangle is pink instead of purple meant I had to either type this out or change it, and they’re both too hard right now. I’m typing this out in the hope you’ll all understand and not send me these sorts of interpretation correction asks or comments. More pain now, hopefully less pain later on, you know?

I appreciate, so much, that you care about the information here - and that you send these asks says something amazing and wonderful about how much you trust me. It really does. But please, please, if you can let the little errors of interpretation go because I have chronic hand pain and cannot produce a perfect blog as much as I might wish to, I’d be so grateful. It lets me save spoons towards the things that need fixing.

Thanks for your understanding, my followers. I really do appreciate it.

#ask #anon #mod chatter #not a toy #text #personal #mod K.A.

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floral-and-fine · 8 years

Text

Billionaire Matchmaker pt. 2

Bucky x f!reader

y/n: reader’s name.

Summary: Tony gets involved in the reader’s love life again.

Warning: I don’t think there’s anything to mention, just some flirting.

A/n: So just part two of my fic Billionaire Matchmaker. (Which you can read here) I wasn’t planning on making a part two, but now that I have I may make a part three and four. Idk, I’d love to hear what people think. :)

Special thanks to @sharknadoslut for the suggestion of making a second part.

When Tony walked into the common room area at the Avengers compound he couldn't help, but notice how Bucky was so focused on his phone. He hated how Bucky ignored him. Even after hooking him up with a hottie like y/n, and things still get weird and quiet when it's just them. "Who are ya talking to?" Tony asked while spying over Bucky' shoulder to read his text messages. "Ah... I see, our pretty little y/n... How's that been going by the way?" Tony raised his eyebrows suggestively. Bucky continued to ignore Tony's comments. "Come on!!! I want all the juicy details," Tony whined. Bucky wasn't budging, his eyes glued to the screen of his phone. Well this is going nowhere Tony thought to himself.

Then he got an idea, a brilliant idea, like anybody could expect anything less. He is the mastermind of this whole situation and he wasn't about to let anyone forget. A grin a mile wide spread across his face. Bucky looked at him from the corner of his eye, trying to figure out why he was so happy all of a sudden. Tony shrugged his shoulders, "Nevermind... you're a tough nut to crack Barnes," Tony said as he reluctantly started to head to the elevator. "But I've heard through the grapevine that y/n has a few...'concerns'... I guess that's the best way to put it." Tony casually pressed the up button, while he rocked back on heels as he waited. A sly smile played on his lips, thinking to himself 'Take the bait Barnes.'

Bucky stared at the back of Tony's head, thinking, 'shit how the hell does anyone ever know when this guy is being serious.' Bucky groaned, he was too damn curious not to ask, and it was about y/n which meant that jumping through a few hoops for Stark's entertainment would be worth it (if what he says is true). "What concerns?" Bucky finally gave in. Tony had to bite his lip to fight his urge to gloat. Once he regained his composure he spoke, "I don't know if I should really say... But what the hell... Now keep in mind she had told this to Pepper, so I really had to work hard to get this info."

Bucky just stared at Tony unamused. He really hated all these games Tony liked to play. Taking the hint from the look on Bucky's face Tony continued, "Alriiight, I'll get to the point... Y/n might have mentioned that the pace of your relationship is moving... Slowly." "Slow?"

This took Bucky by surprised. He just figured he was being a gentleman. Anytime they were together, he would have never assumed that y/n wasn't happy with how things were going. But maybe he was coming off hesitant. While he loved being with y/n it still wasn't easy for him to relax. Not because of her, it was more of an internal matter.

Bucky was determined to make this relationship go right. Y/n's the first person he's been able to get close to, and he was afraid to lose it. Tony watched Bucky's face who was deep in thought, he knew he had him, it was like catching fish in a barrel.

"Think about it this way, you two went from hot and heavy at the party to not much action... Guess she's a little worried that you're losing interest." Tony went over to the bar and started to make a couple of drinks, handing one over to Bucky. "Can I give you my honest opinion Barnes? You and y/n are ready to take things to a much more serious level." Tony winked then finished his drink. "And I have a few ideas on how to help. Leave it all to me."

Later on that day, Bucky found a package in his room with a note that contained specific directions, a time, a place and was signed 'T'. Bucky opened the box revealing a suit, with a black dress shirt and tie. It was something a little too fancy for his taste. Bucky prayed that he wasn't going to regret letting Tony help. He could only wonder about why he needed to dress so formally.

******* While you were finishing up some paperwork at your desk, someone waltzed into your office without knocking. That could only mean one person, Tony. He felt that he wasn't required to knock since he owned the building.

"Mr.Stark." you greeted, without looking up. "Ms. L/n." "Can I help you with something?" "Nothing, just checking in... Wanted to see how your doing." Finally you looked up at him, he had a playful gleam in his eye. As you were about to question his motives, someone knocked on the door. "Aren't you gonna get that?" Tony asked gesturing at the door while glancing at some of the documents. You sighed, getting up and opening the door. You were greeted by a delivery boy with a large bouquet of pink roses and lilies. "Ms. L/n?" the boy asked. "Oh... Um yes." "These are for you ma'am." "Thank you." you looked at the flowers, smiling to yourself. They were beautiful and smelled wonderful. Towards the center was a little envelope. Gently, you laid the flowers down so you could open the card.

It was from Bucky. It didn't say much else other then a place and time. Which was odd considering the other times he gave you flowers, the card contained a sweet and romantic message. Not to mention how he always delivered them personally.

"Oooh, plans for a romantic rendezvous, how cute." Tony said right by your ear, as he read the note over shoulder. You rolled your eyes. "Mr. Stark I would appreciate it if you would refrain from getting involved in my personal life." Tony scoffed and acted offended. "Must I remind you-" "Yes... Yes I know and I am grateful that you introduced me to Bucky." Tony smiled smugly at the comment, "You know, I've heard that Barnes is kinda worried about the two of you..." "And who did you hear this from?" you asked skeptically. "I heard it from Scott, who heard it from Sam, who happens to be chummy with Steve and your beau. So it seems like a likely scenario ... As far as gossip is concerned." You hated yourself for letting your curiosity getting the best of you. "What's Bucky worried about?"

Tony started to mess with papers on your desk again. "Oh... You know things... Like that maybe you might be afraid of him considering his past and all." "That's ridiculous, I lo- care about him... A lot."

You stood there analyzing every interaction you ever had with Bucky. You couldn't recall anything that could've led him to believe that.

"Anyways," Tony interrupted. "Barnes has quite the night planned for the two of you... What are you going to wear?"

Somehow Tony convinced you to let him buy you a new dress for the occasion. While it seemed like a nice offer, he was being real nitpicky about which one. You were trying on dress number 12 when you heard him talking to the saleswoman about whether they had anything that complimented your eyes better or something in lilac. You sighed looking at yourself, you didn't see anything wrong with this dress, but the same could be said for the last 11 of them.

Five dresses later and Tony was convinced that the light blue mermaid dress with the lace details and back, was the best. As you stood in front of your mirror, you had to admit that with your makeup done and hair fixed just right, that the dress looked amazing on you.

*****

The place listed on the note, happened to be a high-end restaurant inside a 5 star hotel. While you and Bucky have been on some great dates, the two of you haven't done anything quite this fancy. It was starting to make you feel nervous.

When you entered the restaurant, you were immediately greeted by the host. "Are you with the Barnes party?" "Yes I am." "Right this way." The entire restaurant was empty. There was a large crystal chandelier in the center of the room. All the tables had floral center pieces. In the corner of the room was a string quartet playing a soothing piece.

At a small table in the middle of it all was Bucky. He looked so handsome, the suit he had on fit him like a glove, but he looked a little uncomfortable. You could tell from the intensity of his stare. You were beginning to have your suspicions about this date, and whether Bucky planned it all.

When he saw you come in, he got to his feet immediately, and pulled out your chair. You smiled at him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "You look beautiful doll." he whispered into your ear. He pulled out your chair. "Thank you, Bucky."

You gave him a once over, making it intentionally obvious that you were checking him out. You whistled, "Hello, nurse!*" Bucky chuckled. "You like it?" "What's not to like?... You could wear anything and look good." "Are you trying to butter me up? cause its working."

This was more like it, flirty banter and simply enjoying each other's company. You noticed how Bucky relaxed, his shoulders weren't so rigid and he was smiling back at you from across the table. Bucky asked about your day. He always did even though your work was tedious and uneventful. You decided not to mention your surprise visit from Tony.

The waiter came by and served champagne. Then proceeded to tell the two of you about the menu for the evening. Most of what he said sounded like gibberish rather than food.

The meal was delicious. Some of it looked too beautiful to even eat. Usually your dates were more low key, like little picnics in a secluded area with a beautiful view, movie nights at your apartment, or going to an old fashioned diner and sharing dessert. There's was just something about those dates that were more intimate. This date, at such an upscale place was fine, but it reminded you of something Tony would do. It was so flashy and over the top. And that's when it hit you, the flowers, the dress, this place, Bucky being uncomfortable, this was all Tony's doing, but why? Why would Bucky agree to let Tony set all this up? Unless Tony was playing with you both, getting the two of you nervous and worried about each other. For what reason you still couldn't figure it out. However, you couldn't put any of this past Tony.

You figured it was time to test your hypothesis.

"Thank you for the flowers by the way, they were a lovely surprise." For a second Bucky looked confused, but he recovered quickly "Glad you liked them." "Well if I can be honest, there was something about the card that took me by surprise." "Really?" Bucky tried not to sound to worried. "Yeah... That confession you wrote about how you truly feel about me, did you really mean it?" you tried to keep your face straight. Bucky face went white "I-I... Umm," he managed to stutter out. A small smile crept on your face as you watched his turmoil.

Finally, Bucky caught on to what you were doing. "You know, don't you?... That this was all Stark's idea." You nodded. "Can I ask why?" Bucky sighed, "He told me that you had some concerns about our relationship." "He didn't?... God damn it Tony! He told me that you were worried about us!" Bucky groaned, "I knew better than to trust him, but the moment he said it was about you... I just had to know." he shook his head in disbelief. You grinned, "I know what you mean, he did the same thing to me. I just love you so much that I couldn't resist."

Bucky's face faltered, he couldn't believe what you just said. You hadn't even noticed, instead you continued to ramble about how gullible you are. "You love me?" Bucky whispered. "What?" you asked, having not heard him. "You just said it.... That you love me." he spoke a bit louder. Your whole face went red. "Huh?... Oh," you laughed nervously, "it just sort of slipped out." "Did you mean it?" You looked down at your dessert, using your spoon to play with the mousse. You glanced at him shyly, "Yeah I do, Buck."

Bucky had the most perfect smile on his face, it was a mix between a smirk and a grin. He stood up and offered you his hand. The two of danced near the table. You laid your head on his shoulder with your hands on his chest. Bucky had his hands on your waist. The two of you swayed back and forth. Bucky pressed a kiss to the side of your head. "I love you y/n."

The two of you stopped dancing. You stood on your tiptoes, while Bucky leaned his head down. The kiss started off chaste, Bucky pulled you closer to him. You bit his bottom lip giving it a little tug before sliding your tongue in his mouth. You could feel Bucky smile.

Someone cleared their throat behind Bucky.

"Excuse the interruption, sir, but this is for you." The waiter handed Bucky an envelope. "What's this?" "Key cards to the Honeymoon suite, sir. I had specific orders to bring those to you after your meal."

Bucky just sort of stared at the envelope, while you averted your eyes. "Stark isn't very subtle is he?" Bucky questioned, still examining the envelope. "He did managed to set us up and now got us to admit how we feel." You added.

"Well no point in wasting this opportunity, hmmm?" he looked at you with his eyebrow cocked. "Care to join me?" You took his hand, "Let's go see why they call it the Honeymoon suite."

*I love the Animaniacs, so just a little reference to them.

Taglist: @sleeping-with-the-snakes

#bucky barnes #buckybarnes #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #marvel #mcu #bucky fanfic #fanfic #tony stark #marvel imagine #bucky fluff #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #reader insert

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jimmythejiver · 7 years

Text

I saw Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets yesterday and I liked it in spite of not liking the two leads. When the production credits segued into the beginning prologue to Bowie’s Space Oddity, I got chills and sang.

My brother and I were the only people in the theater which means it’s probably a box office bomb and no sequels will be made, but I enjoyed being able to talk and point out details. I’ve honestly not read the source material, but I’ve had the translated graphic novel collections (all probably incomplete and edited unfortunately) sitting on my Amazon account for years now, but I’ve honestly not bought anything on Amazon in over a year because I don’t have a steady income so I can’t compare it, but I will say that they should have cast leads that didn’t feel like twentysomethings playing young adult teenage protagonists. It was jarring.

These are shallow complaints honestly, but Dane DeHaan ladies man status seemed informed than shown. Cara Delevingne came off better than in Suicide Squad, but I still don’t like her as an actress and honestly would have preferred Rihanna with an age appropriate male lead. Scarlet Johansson with her Avengers look would have looked accurate to Laureline in the comics, but that’s nitpicky and none of us really want to see her keep getting roles anyway after that Ghost In The Shell debacle.

What I liked about the film is that it proves you can do a space opera with tons of nonhuman aliens that isn’t Star Wars. A lot of comparisons will be drawn to Star Wars and Fifth Element, which the director lifted a lot of design elements from the original comics. To get it out of the way yes the original Valerian and Laureline comics predate Star Wars so their ship resembling the Millennium Falcon is the source material and changing it to modernize it, or kill comparisons is sort of inauthentic. I like that they kept a lot of the retro feeling that probably is in the source material instead of foregoing it for bland apple sleek futurism, or whatever is in for portraying the future now. The sprawling cities made up in the satellite not only remind me of Fifth element, they remind me of paintings of Trantor from Isaac Asimov’s Foundation books. That’s a good thing because I fear that if Foundation ever got adapted we’re stuck with modern sleek with no definitions. Everything looks lived in Valerian, most set designs for the future, or the past don’t. They looked pasted on and sparse.

The plot isn’t anything amazing, or world bending, but it’s the adventure that I liked and it teaches a moral lesson of foregoing protocol when an injustice is made. When the bad guy of the film says he’s a soldier and will take genocide over humiliation, (paraphrasing, I know i have some words off) you wanted him to get it.

Another thing I liked that will bother people is the nineties style writing and dialogue. It was refreshing. I watch a lot of films from my childhood that would now be called out for bad writing because people have earnest emotions and say what they mean and then ridiculous stuff happens that escalates, or fixes a sticky situation and they don’t break the fourth wall and turn snarky over it. If Cara Delevingne rolled her eyes less like a poor man’s Emma Stone, or Dane DeHaan did more than ape Keanu Reeves’s speech patterns it would have felt more classic.

Of course there’s probably a lot of things people especially on tumblr would have a discourse over, like Valerian housing a woman’s soul. I as a transmale didn’t find it offensive, but it’s not for me to say how a transwoman would feel about that. Things relating to the body and mind become a tricky (hate that fucking word) or, problematic in sci-fi fantasy when you factor that in. It’s why I see Ready Player One failing with it’s avatar controversies in an age of social media dictating that you answer for your identity on a constant basis. Rihanna’s character will definitely bother people. Herbie Hancock doesn’t get enough to do. The relationship between Valerian and Laureline will bother people too among other things I can think of.

Anyway, I don’t regret seeing this movie and will probably own it if I see it discounted. I would like for some sequels to happen, but it’s not going to happen because we can’t have cool things. I wish we could have more space opera’s that aren’t Star Wars, Star Trek, or Marvel. I think this movie does way better than what a lot of people complained about Jupiter Ascending lacked. It’s just a shame it isn’t perfect enough to garner another chance and we probably won’t see another space opera property outside of the big three for another decade, or more because of diminishing returns and then we’re back to lazy post-apocalypse, tired teenage dystopias, boring cyberpunk and isolation, stuck in a spaceship survivor genres.

By the way I saw the preview for A Wrinkle In Time and and I know people are going to hide their racism behind unnecessary creative liberties arguments. Unnecessary creative liberties would be aging up Jonas four years in The Giver so he can have hormonal teenage angst and making it in color because people can’t sit through the art direction of Schindler’s List and Sin City, so his seeing color loses meaning, or how it had to be scored because people need to be bombarded with sounds constantly instead of daring to see a cinematic experience that could challenge you, or make you feel unsettled.

Meg was cast to look thirteen as the books. That’s promising. So all the complaints about how Oprah shouldn’t materialize and be a shining light with a disembodied voice is a nitpick. That’s a necessary change because I’ve long learned that masking named actors backfires. That’s why all superheroes barely wear their masks if they have them at all. It was wasteful of Star Wars to waste Lupita Nyong’o as a voice under motion capture, at that point anyone can do the role. Valerian at least showed us Bubble’s two forms, Rihanna and blue squishy alien. I think about the fact that Julia Roberts in Hook had to have a lot of closeups to justify her being Tinker Bell because she’d otherwise be a glowing silent light.

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