#aspects of both could definitely work in the same universe

[wasabi-gumdrop]

the elden ring dlc story trailer just dropped so just letting you guys know that i’m gonna find a way to integrate elden ring lore into dunmeshi somehow because i need both stories like i need air to breathe

[blissfullsvn]

between the lines

pairing. academic rival!taesan x reader genre. fluff word count. 1.3k warnings. reader is sick, reader calls taesan a prick, he is kinda a prick (but fluff triumphs all 🙏) a/n. it's necessary for their dynamic but no actual rivalry is emphasized here... (for my fellow academic rivals-to-lovers enthusiasts... ill cook up sth soon) pt.2 | masterlist

taesan is flustered.

you and taesan had never really had an amicable relationship. to put it into perspective, you'd rather spend hours editing the mess of a report your equally-messy groupmates wrote, than spend hours working together with han taesan—the student well-known for submitting flawless and only flawless pieces of work.

it wasn't always like this. of course it wasn't. who in their right mind would prefer to add 'babysitting adults' onto their plate that's already filled to the brim, instead of making their life easier by grouping with an academic weapon?

but working with han taesan is not for everyone.

actually, scratch that. working with han taesan is not for you.

you don't know what you did, but you're almost 100% sure he has a personal vendetta against you. for such a pretty face, his mouth only spits out the nastiest of things, at least to you.

actually, scratch that again. han taesan only does that to you.

because you shared all the core modules with him, you had foolishly decided to group up with him for all the assignments you had in your first semester of university. to put it simply, that was probably the worst decision you’d made in your life.

why? for every idea you gave, he'd step over with another. for every suggestion you offered, he'd pinpoint every aspect to shut it down. sure, he may have had better ideas, but you didn't think it was necessary to stomp at your input so readily. you definitely didn't think it was necessary to smirk like he'd won a battle after every instance.

you thought you'd be able to escape his belittling remarks and irritating smugness after that one semester, but why did he have to share the same plans as you as well? the day you stepped into the student council office and saw him sitting in the seat next to yours, you already felt dread clawing at you.

fast forward to the present, you're both running for student president for the next year. you had already lost the role of vice president to him this year, so you're determined to not let him pick at you again. not that he could even if he wanted to, because you practically transform into an iron shield whenever he enters your vision (which is more times than you'd liked, considering you share the same environment with him everywhere. he seems to enjoy this, though).

you've been preparing diligently for your student president pitch, but that's also on top of having 5 tight assignment deadlines and planning the biannual festival happening in the next month. for the past weeks, the student council office had turned into your place to work, eat, and even sleep, though the last was never intentional.

today, again, you're sitting at your desk, your laptop opened in front of you, but it’s unlike usual—a cup of hot-turned-lukewarm tea next to you, a pile of tissues scattered around the table, an oversized hoodie draped over your frame, your sniffles echoing across the empty room, and your body which felt heavier than usual.

you've tried your hardest fighting the urge to fall asleep, the dimness of the room not helping, but when the clock struck 3, you decide to give yourself mercy and lean forward, resting your head on your arms over the table. it's far from comfortable; your back is aching, your neck is sore, your nose is uncooperative, and the screech of the door is hurting your head.

you open your eyes briefly at the intruder by the door. they're frozen for a beat, as if surprised to see you there, then they’re tilting their head in what seems to be confusion. soon, they're taking small steps towards you. you should be alarmed, but your defenses have shut down from the fatigue, so all you can think is that if you die, you hope you die a climactic death.

the intruder, thankfully, does not appear to have any intent of killing you. they are, however, intent on disturbing you.

“y/n?” there's a soft tap on your shoulder. you squint, trying to decipher the blurry face in front of you before deciding against it. your act of protest comes out as a small whine that unintentionally escapes the back of your dry throat.

the figure stands there in shock, hand hovering your back. they blink a few times, as if trying to register what they just heard, before they decide to squat next to you, patting your shoulder again.

“y/n? don't sleep here.” the voice is familiar, but uncharacteristically soft. and fond. why is it fond?

you open your eyes again. seeing han taesan mere inches away from your face is something you'd never expect, but you're too tired to even be shocked. instead, you blink slowly, as if you're a newborn reacting to stimuli you've never experienced before.

“han taesan,” you mumble against your arm. your voice comes out nasally from your cold and as a result, more whiny than usual.

“y–yes?” he ignores the stutter and moves his hand to brush away the strands of hair covering your face. it comes so naturally that he freezes when he realises and quickly pulls his hand back to himself.

“prick.” you shut your eyes as you say this, missing the widening of his eyes. “annoying.”

he frowns, “i'm annoying?”

“very.” you don't miss a beat to reply. “why do i have to see you everywhere . . . .” you trail off, your voice decreasing in volume as you speak.

taesan is silent for a few moments, during which the only sounds that can be heard are the tick-tock of the clock and the whirs of the air conditioner. he takes one glance at your hoodie and the tissues around you before promptly turning off the AC.

“fine,” he huffs as he stands up. “i’ll be annoying for a bit more.” he taps your shoulder again. “go home. you can't sleep here. it's so late.”

the deprivation of sleep is getting to you, because your immediate response to him is to let out another whine that would immediately shatter your image of the cool senior and president-to-be if anyone heard you.

which, of course, brings us back to the first line.

taesan is flustered.

he's never seen you this… babyish before. ever since the first semester, all you would entertain him with were glares, furrowed eyebrows, and the occasional roll of your eyes if you were really salty. you had never been this defenseless around him, to which he feels something tug at his chest.

he stretches his lips into a line and squats down again. “what do you want me to do then?” his voice is soft. too soft. “i’m not letting you sleep overnight here.”

you slowly open your eyes, sniffling as you look at him in disbelief. “if you're not willing to carry me home, just go.” you shut your eyes again.

it's silent once again. at this, you dig your face deeper into your arms, having zero expectations. you furrow your eyebrows slightly when you hear shuffles above you, followed by the clash of stationeries, the crackle of the plastic bag used as your trash bin, the sudden cease of the whirring of your laptop fan, and finally the sound of a zipper.

you open your eyes in time to see taesan cupping your face in one hand and pulling your arm with the other to make you sit up. you let yourself be handled without evident resistance, though your confusion is blatant. once he sees that you're up, he quickly squats down in front of you, back facing you.

“climb up. this annoying prick will carry you home.”

a/n. this may or may not be insanely self-indulgent due to a cold i may or may not have. i also may or may not have thoughts about a pt. 2. (edit: pt. 2 is out!)

anw, first post! just fitting for it to be about han taesan bcs this man (read: bnd as a whole) has been living in my brain for the past month (case in point: me literally writing this note at 3am when my headache is killing me).

i hope this was as enjoyable to read as it was for me to write <3

© blissfullsvn 2024. All Rights Reserved.

[tarotofhope]

PAC: 「Which Aspect of your life should you put more energy into」

(Please Read My Pinned post *IMPORTANT NOTE* before selecting a Pile)

Pick an Image by meditating and selecting the image you feel called to. You can be attracted towards more than 1 image. If you are not able to select maybe this reading isn't for you.

*TRIGGER WARNING* Many strong trigger messages are there in Pile 2 and 5. It's almost calling out toxic habits/people because some people are focusing their energy on negative things. It's mostly talking about shadow aspects. That energy could be yours or someone you're currently closely dealing with.

It was very hard to write both these piles for me but I couldn't skip those because it was important to mention them.

Please don't take any offense, if you think you don't relate to those piles or if you feel uncomfortable reading them, you're free to choose another pile. Don't let a reading ruin your day and don't take it to your heart.

Pile 1

Wheel Of Fortune, The Fool, Ten Of Swords.

Welcome to your reading, Pile 1. You guys went through a lot of trouble because of your family patterns and beliefs/values or your ancestral trauma that has been carried down towards you by your family. There seems to be a lot of toxicity here. You don't like it and you're someone who doesn't want to carry it forward to your own offsprings as well which is such a righteous and courageous decision in itself. If you think you don't want to follow the same toxic pattern, you've already done half the work for your coming generations. That's very applaudable. The universe and your guides/angels will be so proud of you. This decision of yours itself is going to be a huge game changer which is why The Wheel Of Fortune appeared. It could be so that the elders of your family or your parents/guardian believe that, "We faced this trauma, this strictness from our parents so you're definitely going to have a taste of it. What's so wrong about it? It's normal." That's their toxic thinking which they inherited from the previous generations. One example I want to share here, which is very important. I was watching an asian stand-up comedy video on youtube where the guy(in his 40s) said to the young audience, "Your generation has become so sensitive that you cannot even handle beatings from your parents. You consider it as traumatic, toxic. You guys are so confused about your gender and sexual identity. Our generation suffered so much more than you but we never complained like you guys do. We never talked back to our parents/elders because we thought they can never be wrong. We accepted bad/toxic behaviour with ease and never argued back in defense and so we never complicated things for ourselves." But I believe, this kind of mindset of never speaking for yourself, never being curious to raise questions is always going to stunt your personal growth and development. If children are not questioning certain behaviours, parents must teach them to do so, that way parents can also win the trust of their children. Breaking toxic family patterns and creating a life full of freedom and hope for yourself and others should be your motto in life. You're not supposed to carry the same toxic family patterns towards your future generations. You should be the one who marks the end of it. If you feel the need to speak up, then speak up. I know we cannot change somebody's mindset but we can atleast teach the younger generations about what's toxic and what's not.

That's all I got for you, my dear Pile 1.

Love, light, hope and peace to you..🌸🌼🌻

Pile 2

Ace of Swords reversed, 7 of Swords, The Tower and The Sun Reversed.

Welcome to your reading, Pile 2. You're someone very sharp and intelligent by birth. Like it's in your blood.

*Trigger Warning ahead. If you do not resonate, you're free to choose another pile, please don't take any offense. It could be you or it could be someone you're dealing with currently. Different people will relate differently.*

There's something bad that's happened to you because of which things took an ugly turn. You maybe started putting your energy into revenge or as a result of getting hurt, you're letting out all of your anger by using your abilities and gifts in negative ways. As I said you have a sharp mind, you might be using your intelligence in such kind of jobs where there's deception/gambling/fraud, in something that's not morally correct. You're not using your mind in doing something smart in a good way, which could bring more convenience to you and others. Whatever you're doing, you're very good at it but it does not seem morally correct. I'm not saying you're a bad person but you're letting out all the negative energies of what has happened to you on others. See, the way you think, the way you see it, matters a lot. If you think of revenge, then it will be so but rather think of fighting back, you can get back at people who cause great harm to you but are in denial or having no remorse whatsoever. Sometimes, other people can't do justice to you, if you are a survivor, you can do it for yourself because the victims who die in an assault/murder/attack etc don't get the chance to do justice for themselves. In this pile, I can also see a lot of jealousy and a habit of cursing people for doing the slightest mistakes which hurts you even a tiny bit. These could be the after-effects of a trauma. There's an advice to use your gifts and abilities for good things. You might be someone who themselves is very hurt and troubled but you might be doing the same thing to others. After The Tower moment that happened(means when you were probably deceived/betrayed or hurt), you might have started believing in the idea that, "There's nothing such as right or wrong, it doesn't matter. I don't believe in karma. Karma needs to first get to the people who hurt me and I don't see them getting their karma, so it doesn't work, I guess" or you still know the difference between right and wrong but you've become so cold that you don't want to give a care about it. You're also someone who is very hard to impress. Some of you also believe in working smart than working hard. You need to know that by seeking revenge or getting things by wrong means is only going to look good temporarily, it's not going to help you in the long run. Very few of you could also be into black magic and use it to get things done your way. You could also be someone having a leadership position but you're using authoritative power in the wrong manner. Focus your energy into healing yourself and then let yourself out into the world. The world needs people like you but you're doing the opposite. Let your scars be your strength. Surrender your hurt, traumas and troubles to the universe.

That's all I got for you, my dear Pile 2.

Love, light, peace and hope to you..🌸��🌼

Pile 3

The Devil, Ace Of Swords, 5 Of Cups and 5 of Wands.

Welcome to your reading, Pile 3. It seems like you guys are not treated fairly at work. You're in a constant fight to survive. You might also be currently in an argument with a superior/parent/guardian/authority figure. You're quite disppointed and tired of your current job situation. Either you're doing this work out of an indirect/unspoken pressure from home, because you want to put food on the table or you're working here because your family wants you to or because you just want money to fulfil some needs. This work is taking a lot of your time and the income is quite unsatisfactory. This could be a family business or a startup as well for some people but something about it looks forced, like you had no choice. Lots of 5s here in the cards, means it's something which brings you sorrow, dissatisfaction, regret, disappointment. Some of you have recently left a job due to the above mentioned reasons. For some of you, this could be an educational course that you're doing out of pressure while for some of you, this could be your own happily chosen field of work but currently you're struggling to keep up, either you are not in good health or people have too many expectations from you. If this is something where force/pressure is involved and you're not okay with it then you should somehow try to get out of this situation soon or if this is something which seems out of your control and you can't get out, you need to do something as a side hustle or any relaxation activity/extracurricular activity which you like for your own well-being, but that side-activity should be equally calming and strong enough to get all that stress out of you. You will need to do a bit of balancing, a bit multi-tasking(which is work + relaxation activity) in order to keep your mind calm, otherwise, it will take a huge toll on your health in the long run.

So, that's all I got for you, my dear Pile 3

Love, light, peace and hope to you..🌻🌼🌸

Pile 4

Knight Of Pentacles, 2 Of Cups, Ace Of Pentacles, 2 Of Wands.

Welcome to your reading, Pile 4.

Lot of 2s here, so there's a strong wish for companionship in this pile. You want stability in your work and personal life. You are looking forward to finally settle down. But before that, you need to focus on your career, independence and money. Work, earn, settle down your finances and then marry. You could be under the age-group of marriage or could have crossed that age limit according to societal beliefs and norms but believe me, the universe works in magical ways. It's never too late to do anything. You must first focus on yourself and your overall growth then only you could bring that level of prosperity in your married life as well. This applies to your partner as well. We all have some baggage due to bad experiences and traumas but if it is something that's constantly been like an itch you need to scratch, then you need to first get rid of that itch. You need to be healthy and fit because I'm also hearing some of you are not happy with your looks/weight or something that is related to your body or you have some chronic health issues which you're dying to get rid of. There's also some problems with finances going on, some serious family issues and you know on the inside that you're not currently at your best. So, you first need to stabilise your finances and health before you jump into any serious relationships or marriage. I'm not telling you to not fall in love neither am I asking you to hold back. I'm just telling you to be ready and prepared before taking such a major step in your personal life because then it would be a total mess and you'll carry major regrets and insecurities later on because of the things you didn't work on earlier. What needs to be done earlier should be done earlier for your own sake. Don't think that things will change magically after entering into a romantic relationship or marriage. You're hopeful and being dreamy but you're not ready. If you think you're mentally quite disturbed and unstable, not well health-wise, not independent enough, finances are not good then you shouldn't go looking for a partner just because everybody else is getting into a relationship/getting married. Work on yourself first, what's meant to be yours will be yours and only yours to take. Nobody will be able to snatch it away from you.

So, that's all I got for you, my dear Pile 4

Love, light, peace and hope to you..🌼🌻🌸

Pile 5

King Of wands Reversed, Wheel Of Fortune Reversed, 9 Of Cups, Judgement.

Welcome to your reading, Pile 5.

*Trigger Warning Ahead. The following messages contains many triggers. Don't take it to your heart. If you do not resonate, you're free to choose another pile but please don't take any offense as this reading could be about you or someone toxic you're dealing with*

You could be too much dependent on others or others' opinion of you. I can also see a lot of toxic femininity and masculinity, blaming on others for your defeats, losses and bad luck but you are not taking an initiative to see where the problem exactly lies. We all are not perfect but this pile specifically seems to call out toxic traits. You are someone very kind and generous and you like to help people but at the same time your intentions are mostly directed in your own favor. It's good to keep yourself first but you might be extremely focused only on your needs. You might not like to accept a 'no' from others. There could also be an ego issue because of which you don't like to apologise to others. You could be someone who has created a stable home for themselves or someone who doesn't have anything of their own(it is either your parents' or someone else's resources), but there's an ego issue and a lot of pride. Now, here there are 2 kinds of people, ones who are deeply connected with their family members or atleast one or two people in their life whereas the other ones are not bothered by relationships at all. You could be someone who love pets and/or children. You might even be a quick judge of character because you like to observe but you might not be always right. I'm also getting a lot of greediness from this pile. There is little to no focus on self-growth and inner healing here. You might also be someone who gets angry easily, always wants an upperhand in an argument. You like to do things yourself while for some of you, you don't give enough credit to people who help you. Again, similarly to Pile 2, you might have great leadership qualities but a habit of controlling everyone your way, imposing your way of doing things on others. You need to meditate, pause and take a look inside your mind, body and soul. That's where you'll find your answers. Start putting yourself in other people's shoes and try to see the world from a different point of view.

That's all I got for you, my dear Pile 5.

Love, light, peace and hope to you..🌸🌼🌻

Thank you so much for being here. I post PAC readings every Tuesday and Friday. Do love and support by reblogging, liking or following.

[turbulentscrawl]

I LOOVE your Luca he's soooo <3 may I please request some headcanons for him with an s/o from the future? (As in our time) like they time traveled back to the manor and are now stuck there. Sfw and if you can think of anything nsfw then go for it!

Thank you! And I love writing for Luca, he's definitely a favorite of mine <3

I may have missed the mark a tad here? I think Luca would largely treat an future-s/o the same as one who's not...but technology definately plays a factor in some aspects of the relationship.

Also the whole time I wrote this i kept thinking about what skills someone from the future would have. It would be hilarious to blare music to speed up ciphers, or maybe chug a preworkout and get a kiting boost hahah

-So first of all, everyone is completely mindblown by this development. It’s not like anyone really knew anything concrete about the manor’s time-space situation, but this just proves even the most popular theories hold no weight. Are you from a different era, or a different timeline all together? Why are you the only one—or are you just the first?? Has more time passed than they suspected, is anyone here even from the same universe???

-Basically, there’s a lot of chaos, spoken and unspoken. Everyone is varying degrees of scared, distrustful, and excited. It’s mostly the last one, in Luca’s case, which is why he’s one of the first people you get to know. Instead of avoiding you, he’s constantly around you. Question after question after question—it probably gets tiring after a while.

-But he’s just so earnest! His excitement is contagious, and despite running his mouth a lot he’s incredibly respectful and well-mannered. When he gets a moment with you alone, he concedes that this must all be more overwhelming for you than it was for everyone else, considering that you’ve lost about 100 years of development along with the regular shockers. So he asks you to come to him if anyone treats you too harshly. He promises to be a respite from that, if nothing else.

-And he is! Luca doesn’t often let people in his work spaces for several reasons…but he makes an exception for you. Just don’t touch anything, okay? You’re safe in his messy spaces. It’s during a visit there that he tells you about what happened to him, all the things he’s been told but doesn’t remember. He’s open about having been in prison, of course, but he doesn’t give the details to just anyone. This is his good-faith peace offering, strange as it might seem. And you can share your life with him when you’re ready.

-If any of your technology happened to come through with you, he’s going to want to look at them. I don’t…entirely suggest letting him? It’s up to you, but just know your phone may not survive the thorough disassembly-inspection he wants to give it. On the other hand! I think Luca could charge your phone just by holding it so no worries if you didn’t have a charger in your bag.

-Years down the line, you two will still have things to teach one another. Culture and technology both are very different in each of your homes, and the little details show themselves at the strangest times. Luca, in all his genius, does his best to replicate the things you miss most about home. It’s only fair that the manor be populated with creature comforts for everyone. It’s not that he’s trying to impress you or anything.

-At some point he starts to ask about dating modern culture. It has its perks, obviously, like being able to stay in immediate touch long-distance, but honestly he’s a bit disappointed to hear about the rush and informality of it. Luca returns the favor, explaining how courtship tended to work from his time…so you know what he’s doing when he starts courting you. He can speed things along if you really want him to, but Luca would enjoy a month or so of gentle flirting and pining. Anticipation is part of the enjoyment!

-After being together for so long, he starts to pick up some of your mannerisms and modern dialect. It’s funny for him to suddenly be throwing out pop culture references when he doesn’t fully understand them. It’s like teaching your grandparents slang; he doesn’t get it but he’s happy to be involved. I’m 100% sure there’s no wifi at the manor but if you have any funny videos saved to you phone they become Luca’s favorite thing. You are now designated manor documentarian! Make sure to catch all of everyone’s embarrassing and funny moments.

-On that note, it’s also incredibly helpful for Luca if you film the two of you a lot. Literally anything, him mumbling to himself while he works, silly jokes, him playing the piano. It’s so much easier to show him things when his memory fails, than to try and explain your relationship from the ground-up.

[leverage-ot3]

Is leverage redemption worth watching? I love Leverage but idk if i could enjoy the show if hardison isn't in most episodes or if the reboot sells out in some way.

okay so I showed up to this ask like four months late with a smoothie so I'm sorry about that BUT

does redemption have it's flaws? yes, I will be the first to admit that!

however, as someone who deeply loves leverage, the characters and what the show stands for, I still can find myself enjoying redemption.

there's one post that's in my drafts talking about the differences between the og and redemption and the so-called universe physics (how logic works in both shows and how they are the same/differ) and there are definitely some differences. there are some really good posts comparing them in the tags and I'll try to tag them as watch redemption when they come up!

I'm going to be really honest right now and say that (no shade) I feel like redemption s1-2 were lacking because john rogers was not a main writer for them. devlin and the others are great and know their stuff, but redemption was missing some of the grit (balanced with everything else) that the original run had. redemption is more fun and lighthearted (where the og was still fun and had comedic elements but also had a more jaded perspective). I think part of that change is the absence of nate as a character and what he brought to the table, but the other part of that is very much the way the show is written overall

I have seen some criticism about parker being a caricature of what she was in the original run (ex: how she goes to a child's psychologist and uses puppets sometimes, is overtly weird, more loud about stuff, etc) BUT I will say that I think there's some nuance to that

I don't think the child psychiatrist thing is infantalizing- some methods of therapy work for people more than others and that is me speaking as someone who works in mental health. if play therapy and stuff like that work for you as an adult, good for you! whatever works for you is more than enough the overtly and loudly being weird thing I really do think can be taken either way. in the original run part of parker's character progression was that she was learning how to interact with people normally (or at least more efficiently), but her being more out about that now can be taken as she is more comfortable in her skin and acting like she wants because she is surrounded by people who love and support her. maybe she doesn't want to (or have to!) mask all the time and I don't see a problem with that

HOWEVER! there are certain criticisms that are related to her characterizations and overlaps with her autism and I don't want to speak over the autism community about those aspects and how they have manifested in her character in redemption so I'm leaving it there

as for the hardison being absent aspect- I was REALLY afraid of that at first BUT the loss isn't so deeply impactful when you have characters like breanna and harry added to the mix. I went in ambivalent about harry and excited to have breanna (a canon queer) joining the team, but I have come to love and cherish both of them dearly and wouldn't want to replace them or lose them as characters in this found family ensemble. I think the writers handled aldis' packed schedule really well and even though he isn't there in most episodes, his presence is still very much around. parker and eliot talk about him and reference him when he's gone. so do sophie and breanna, even harry. he isn't on the screen but the relationships he's formed with the other characters and the impact he's had on them is very evident.

there are some takes from users about whether or not the ot3 was queerbait, un-canoned, etc in redemption. I have a lot of thoughts about it and a lot of them are incomprehensible but what I can say is that I have renewed hopes for the progression and canon development of their relationship now that john rogers is back as the main writer for s3

[bitter-bats-cult-of-the-moon]

Energy Explained in Other Systems

There is a lack of measurable evidence because any person that has worked with energies have had different experiences but were able to understand and manipulate energies according to their own will.

Energy has been used in many ways within culture and religion and have set beliefs depending on the system being practiced.

Next, are some given definitions defining energies within diverse philosophies.

Hindu = Prana

Chinese = Qi /Chi

Japanese =Ki

Greek = Pneuma

Hawaiian = Mana

Tibetan Buddhism = Lung

Hindu Philosophy

A Sanskrit word for "life force" or "vital principle" is often referred to as Prana. It is described as first coming down from the Sun and connecting all elements of the Universe. It has been invoked within the Hindu scriptures of the Vedas and Upanishads.

Prana is the belief of vitality surrounding all living beings. This energy is responsible for all bodily functions. There are five types of pranas, collectively known as the five vāyus.

1. Prāṇa:              Beating of the heart and breathing. Prana enters the body through the breath and is sent to every cell through the circulatory system.

2. Apāna:             Elimination of waste products from the body through the lungs and excretory systems.

3.Uḍāna:              Sound production through the vocal apparatus. It represents the conscious energy required to produce the vocal sounds corresponding to the intent.

4. Samāna:          Food digestions, repair or manufacture of new cells and growth, and heat regulations throughout the body.

5. Vyāna:             The energy that is needed for the body to have proper circulation, and the functions for the voluntary muscular system in which there is expansion and contraction processes throughout the body.

Chinese Philosophy

The earliest texts in which Qi or Chi is described was in 'Analects of Confucius' where it could mean "breath" and was combined with the Chinese word for blood.

Xue-qi, "blood and breath."

Living beings are born because of an accumulation of qi, and as the beings live out their lives the qi declines eventually resulting in death. This indicates that xue-qi referred to all living things, but it is believed that qi or chi exists within all things tangible.

For example, the wind is the qi or chi to the Earth, and the cosmic concepts of yin and yang are "the greatest of qi"

Yin and Yang which means "bright-dark," and "positive-negative" are the opposing forces needed in order to complement the concept of balance. There are thoughts that this duality symbolizes contradicting energy forces which manifest as light and dark, fire and water, expansion, and contraction. With this said, Chinese medicine states that the balance of negative and positive forms in the body are believed to be essential for overall satisfactory health.

Japanese Mythology

During the sixth and seventh centuries the Chinese word qi (or chi) was written using the same kanji script for their interpretation for energy being "Ki"

However, the meanings are a tad different.

While the Chinese use chi or qi to describe that energy exists in all things, animate and inanimate objects, the Japanese believe it is the creative flow and expressions used within our daily lives, martial arts, and symbolizes aspects of nature, and thusly the spirits. It is the transfer from living, animate beings in to inanimate which can change and manifest into various forms. It is the necessary intentions one wields.

Greek Mythology

Pneuma, "The breath of life" or "vital spirit" is composed of kinetic energies within the vessel, while Ignis is composed of thermal energies. All human beings need both kinetic and thermal energies in order to properly function.

In Greek medicine, pneuma is the form of circulation throughout the body's vital organs. Due to this the role, pneuma plays within the body to sustain consciousness. Some physiological theories suggest that the pneuma mediates between the heart, and the heart is regarded as the seat of the mind, and the brain.

In similar, Stoic philosophy, pneuma is the active and generative principles that are organized between the individual and the cosmos. The highest forms are the Gods, and the human soul. The human soul is believed to be fragments of the gods given life force in order to be born and given a vessel upon the physical plane. This exists within all animate and inanimate objects as energy transfers and changes.

Hawaiian Mythology

Mana, the spiritual energy of power and strength. This energy exists within places and people; however, it is said that mana is both external and internal concepts.

The Hawaiian people believe that individuals can gain mana or lose it depending on one's actions in everything that they do.

In mythology there were two ways to gain mana, and this was either done sexually or through violence.

To sexually gain mana one must invoke the god, Lono, deity of peace and fertility.

To gain mana through violence one must invoke the god Ku, deity of war and politics.

Tibetan Buddhism

Lung means the wind or breath. Exists as a key concept in Vajrayana traditions. Generally, it's concept relates to the understanding of the subtle body, and Three Vajras. Those three are the body, speech, and mind. Lung relates to the subtle flow of energy and the five elements. (Fire, Water, Earth, Space, and Air) Lung is mostly closely connected to the Air Element.

Lung has also been used to describe the winds or prana being used in conjunction with the subtle body during a time of exercise, but also more importantly everyday functions of the body and its own senses. There are five psychic winds which manifest into mahabhuta. These five relate to the lifeforce that animate the body-mind (namarupa) of all sentient beings.

The Five Root or Major Winds

The root winds support an element and is responsible for a function of the human body.

    The 'life-supporting wind' (Tib. སྲོག་འཛིན་རླུང་, sok dzin lung; Wyl. srog 'dzin rlung). Located in the brain, this lung regulates functions such as swallowing, inhalation, and concentration.

    The 'upward-moving wind' (Tib. གྱེན་རྒྱུ་རླུང་, gyengyu lung; Wyl. gyen rgyu rlung). Located in the chest and thorax, this lung regulates, among other things, speech, the body's energy and vitality, memory, mental endeavour and diligence.

    The 'all-pervading wind' (Tib. ཁྱབ་བྱེད་རླུང་, khyap ché lung; Wyl. khyab byed rlung). Residing in the heart, this lung controls all the motor activities of the body.

    The 'fire-accompanying wind' (Tib. མེ་མཉམ་གནས་རླུང་, me nyam né lung; Wyl. me mnyam gnas rlung). Found in the stomach and abdomen area, the fire-accompanying wind regulates digestion and metabolism.

    The 'downward-clearing wind' (Tib. ཐུར་སེལ་རླུང་, thursel lung; Wyl. thur sel rlung). Located in the rectum, bowels and perineal region, this lung's function is to expel faeces, urine, semen, and menstrual blood. It also regulates uterine contractions during labour.

The Five Branch Winds

The five branch winds enable the senses to operate.

    The naga wind (Tib.ཀླུའི་རླུང་, lu'i lung; Wyl. klu'i rlung). This lung connects with the eyes and sight.

    The tortoise wind (Tib. རུ་སྦལ་གྱི་་རླུང་, rubal gyi lung; Wyl. ru sbal gyi rlung). This wind connects with the heart and the sense of hearing.

    The lizard wind (Tib.རྩངས་པའི་རླུང་, tsangpé lung; Wyl. rtsangs pa'i rlung) associated with the nose and the sense of smell.

    The devadatta wind (Tib.ལྷས་བྱིན་གྱི་རླུང་, lhéjin gyi lung; Wyl. lhas byin gyi rlung) related to the sense of taste.

    The 'king of wealth deities' wind (Tib. ནོར་ལྷ་རྒྱལ་གྱི་རླུང་, nor lha gyal gyi lung; Wyl. nor lha rgyal gyi rlung). This wind connects with the body and the sense of touch.

[lookingthroughmirrors]

What do you think about Percy and Nico or Pernico?

(Please no hate, I know people have a lot of opinions and this is simply mine based on my interpretation of the characters and not meant as an attack on anyone)

Hi 👋

I really like pernico, at least in some of the fanfics I’ve seen but I prefer it when they’re older and come back together. I really think the Percy and Nico friendship gets overlooked quite a bit, personally because I think a lot of people see Nico as a kid, and in comparison don’t see Percy like that.

I mean that more so when it comes to Bianca. I’ve seen different takes that it was Percy’s fault, that Percy purposely hurt Nico, that Percy doesn’t deserve to mourn Bianca.

1. I think Pernico no matter when it’s set, needs to address Bianca in some capacity, because it is such an integral part of their arc. I think for Percy there is always a guilt that he’ll have, survivor guilt or otherwise about what happened to Bianca and that should be acknowledged. It is also the first death that happens so directly in front of Percy, and his reaction shows that in comparison to later deaths in botl and tlo. Percy was used as a scapegoat in this situation for Nico’s anger at Bianca’s untimely death (and her somewhat abandonment of him but that’s a whole other thing). I think this is why I like older pernico so much, because often times they’ve dealt with or are dealing with this to some extent and I don’t see how the ship would work without first dealing with this.

2. I think the ship only works once Nico is passed the hero worship and later hatred of Percy. I think Nico has a lot of issues he needs to deal with and that he’d have to be doing that first before pernico could work. Tho I do love doomed relationship fics. I think they’d both have to reevaluate how they view one another for it to work (ie. Percy was a child put in an impossible situation, Nico was the same, the blame game was played, Nico is not one extreme or the other). Moral of the point, they need to sort their individual shit out first, and their issues between each other before a relationship could work, but I really think it would and really love the idea of them being together.

3. In some aspects I think Pernico, after going through points 1 and 2, is healthier than what I know of Solangelo or Percabeth in canon. Now this isn’t bashing but I do think both Solangelo and Percabeth are toxic in ways that aren’t as wildly addressed both in canon and fanon. The stuff with Nico’s powers always bothered me. He’s extremely powerful, and i think he kinda ends up nerfed in later books and things like Will banning him from shadow travelling for his health. One point is I think a child of Hades knows more about shadow travel and it’s affects than a child of Apollo, doctor or not. I also think that Nico had a tendency to overextend his powers in canon, which it’s shown when Percy does the same thing he’s heavily drained, nearly passes out ect. I think Percy would be able to help Nico in exercising his powers, as I think that’s the big issue really. I also think Nico as a character would be very tied to the Greek world and live more in that world than the mortal world, which despite canon I think would suit Percy. I think the whole New Rome College thing is odd, and he’s clearly going for Annabeth. Percy hated school, and I think it’s much more likely he went on to train halfbloods or worked in legion in New Rome than going to university.

(This is so much longer than I intended, sorry)

Overall, I think Percy and Nico (both in a relationship and as friends) have a lot of potential that wasn’t lived up to. There are definitely ways it could be toxic, but not more than any other ship has the potential to be if broken down (Percabeth, Piper and Jason and the fact he had no memory, Solangelo, the weirdness that is Leo and Calypso). Ultimately I think Pernico can prove to be a stronger ship than a lot of others too, because they’ve seen each other at their worst, they’ve seen each other stripped back and raw and grieving and they have seen each other in ways nobody else has. Percy knew Nico before he lost Bianca, he knew that side of Nico. Nico saw Percy through the war, through everything during the last Olympian. He saw him command the river Styx and wasn’t scared (which begs the comparison of Percabeth in Tartarus and Annabeth making Percy feel so bad about a particular power that he wouldn’t use it even when it meant he would die and ultimately had to be saved by a third party). They’ve seen each other grow and change, and that in turn changes people. I truly think once you get past the trauma that taints all their interactions, once they address and move past it, they are much better than many other ships. They seen the worst, and I think with that they’d find it much easier to be vulnerable with one another and show parts of themselves that they don’t show anyone else. I definitely like Pernico far better than Percabeth.

I honestly didn’t mean to write an entire essay on Pernico and my opinions but here we are. If you’ve read this far I hope I answered your question.

[onehundredandeleventropicalfish]

In your opinion which of the Endless do you think has the hardest job and why?

short answer? death

slightly less short answer - either death, dream, or none of them, depending on the angle you're looking at it from

long answer... they're all perfectly suited to the task they were made for, so in the sense of physical ability, none of their jobs are difficult. which means difficulty can only be measured by emotional toll. and that's not really based on the job so much as it is on how much they care

the big thesis in sandman is that life = change. that's an equation that cuts both ways, and a theme that runs through almost every character. the endless, as the fundamental aspects of life, all have power over something that can change people, right to their core

and that's a huge responsibility, which they all have their own ways of coping with

we never learn that much about how it affects destiny or despair, but death had a huge character arc to go through (everything she says in the show is originally in a winters tale, as well as the fact that she stopped collecting souls, because it was getting to her too much - until she realised that was doing more damage), so now she copes by finding meaning and purpose in it, by befriending everyone she comes to take, by living in some ways a human life of her own

desire ignores it, and tells themselves that mortals don't matter to them, so why should they care who gets hurt? they turn it all into a big game and they don't let themselves think about it for even a second, because if they did it would destroy them (the narration tells us this at the end of dolls house)

destruction didn't cope with it, he left, and refuses to let there ever be another destruction of the endless

and del... just observes it. she accepts the difficulty and the responsibility, and sees it with a lot clearer eyes than her siblings. and sometimes that means she's the most fit to cope with it. other times it breaks her too, and that's when she gets her bad days

the reason i list dream as a possible option here, is because dream is not coping. he's trying to do everything his siblings do at once and none of it is working for him. he can't be desire, because he cares too much about mortals to ignore and laugh at them. he can't be death because he doesn't see himself as someone with a life, just someone with a job - that has to come before everything else. he can't be destruction because again, he values his purpose more than his happiness, leaving is inconceivable. and he can't be delirium because that would require him to see the world as it really is - and his nature runs fundamentally contrary to that

so that could be why dream. but this could also be why none of them - because that's not really the job that's hard, so much as it's not working for dream specifically. if he was somebody just slightly different, he'd be able to handle it a lot better

(the other reason i might consider dream is the vortexes - we don't see enough of the other endless to know if this is something they have to deal with (or something similar), it might be, so this might not be a dealbreaker? but it's definitely not easy for dream, overture goes into that plenty, he viscerally hates the idea of killing people, it goes against everything he is, and yet he has to, or the entire universe will die. and that's a tough responsibility to have)

so why death? because she's the only one who will never die. she doesn't, herself, change, not even if you force a reincarnation like with dream. her sigil will stay the same forever, the necropolis only holds six funeral cerements - death is unlike the others, its written in the rules. it's not the only way she's an exception either; it's mentioned at one point in brief lives that the endless all feel uncomfortable in each others' realms, they can sense that this place is made of an entirely different energy to the one they're used to. except death, who can traverse all the other realms as easily as her own, because even her siblings have to die eventually

more people under your charge, more people to care about. the more it hurts if you let it. her job covers every being in existence, and for the most part it involves being something they don't want you to be. she has had every negative emotion people are capable of directed at her, in a much more first-hand way than her siblings may get. and you have to be okay with it, you have to

because the only way to be free of it is to be the only person left in all existence

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ON THE TOPIC OF BARNABY. as well as his relationship with Wally.

So. To kick this off - Riv (@funonion) and I were Speculating, and they introduced me to the johari window:

They put Barnaby in the “facade” section, and I entirely agree. To quote them;

“So he’s Wally’s guide, right? He’s the “knowledgeable” one of the two and is always the one teaching him new things. And you know, it’s one thing if you’re just teaching him how to laugh or how to tell a joke. But.

Clown has given us two doors. One says that Barnaby understands Wally in a way the rest of the neighborhood doesn’t, and is willing to do his dirty work so to speak. The other says that their friendship was not a natural occurring thing and had to be enforced repeatedly within the show. HOW THAT’S BEING ENFORCED IS ANOTHER THING ENTIRELY but it is worth it to note.

What is Barnaby willing to keep? What is he willing to bury for his little buddy? I can’t say anything definitively yet, but the fact that I even have to ask is telling. The class clown archetype is usually used as a way to cover up for something else a character might be experiencing”

And my response, (I won’t directly quote because I have little things in the phrasing & elaboration to add / tweak );

Barnaby being a Comic Relief Character immediately raised so many alarms in my head. I love comic relief characters. They’re always so fucked up in one way or another, and Barnaby is almost certainly SO inauthentic. He’s wearing a comedy mask just as opaque as Wally’s own mask. In everything we’ve seen about him so far he’s either Teaching Wally, wisecracking/joking, or… pretty much nothing else. We got that moment of concern in audio 14-14, but that doesn’t reveal anything beyond genuine care for Wally.

Comedic characters have the best disguises. Their poker faces & ability to deflect is always top tier [and practiced], and just look at comedy-focused actors and entertainers - so many of them have severe issues, either with their mental health or life. From what i’ve observed both in that aspect & with fictional characters, they play it off & work hard to entertain/deflect [one in the same] right up until the end. Sometimes it’s a coping mechanism. Usually it’s both. If they laugh loud enough and make people think they’re lighthearted fools w/ nothing underneath, no one will look any deeper and thus they’re “safe”. 

& I’m a little suspicious that Barnaby’s red/orange/yellow spots aren’t naturally those colors. While yes, he could be (in-universe) designed that way to echo Ms. Beagle, there’s a strong possibility that that’s not it. What if he paints them to feel a connection to her, or it’s a physical manifestation of Barnaby covering up his insecurities/issues - what if it’s part of him striving to convince the world that he is what he paints himself as. 

The laidback funnyguy with a loving mom and not a problem in the world. 

And I mean, Barnaby claims to be a natural blue and I believe him! But the other colors? I’m doubtful

(I was going to include the Cast As Lil Kids Designs in this since Barnaby has all blue spots, but given how early in 2021 it was posted and how there seem to be little discrepancies from the ~official~ designs, I don’t want to provide it as evidence.)

& on the topic of Wally and Barnaby’s relationship being both real and not - disclaimer, this conversation happened before my Updated Thoughts On Them post, so there may be some minor rephrasing here from what I originally said - I’m sure that the relationship started out as inauthentic. Wally was assigned Barnaby as a best friend and technically vice versa, but I don’t doubt for a second that it became real to some extent. Clown wouldn’t treat their relationship outside of “canon” WH stuff the way that he does if they weren’t actually friends. They’ve said that Wally & Barnaby would be friends in every universe (which melts my heart <3 platonic soulmates my beloved <3), so then I have to agree with Riv. what WILL Barnaby do for Wally? I touched on this in the Milk Theory, but especially if Barnaby prides himself on “knowing Wally better than anything else”, what would Barn do to preserve that?

This relates to another conversation we had - Barnaby possibly having abandonment issues. It’s such a choice to have him of all characters be explicitly stated as an orphan. That and while every other Neighbor with a mentioned family have a somewhat large one (Howdy and his gajillion relatives, Julie and her three siblings, Poppy and her crowded tree [note: Eddie has a mentioned mother, but that info is tenuous and who knows if there are other Dears]), Barnaby has also explicitly stated that Ms. Beagle is his only family. That’s it. And farm life can’t be a sociable way to grow up, not with all the chores he must have had and how rural he might have grown up. Barnaby jokes that Home is the “Big Apple”, which could just be a joke - but jokes often come from a place of truth, and Home might be the most populated area Barnaby has lived in. Who’s to say!

Either way, Barnaby was orphaned one way or another, and I don’t doubt that it weighs on him. Especially if  his birth parents really did abandon him. That added to a possible life of loneliness… I wonder if he’s latched onto Wally emotionally, which would hit all the painful places if it turns out that my “Barnaby is more attached to Wally than Wally is to Barnaby” theory has merit. Abandonment issues could also strongly back the apparent walls he’s plastered over with circus tent fabric

Back to Barnaby & Wally: the fact that, at present, Barnaby and Wally seem to have the best disguises / strongest masks. That. looking at 14-14, i suspect that Barnaby is excellent at keeping his up, but as soon as Wally’s mask cracks, so does Barnaby’s. 

And then there’s the side of their dynamic that we could look at - it seems to be a very multifaceted relationship. The way that Barnaby genuinely cares yet in the 00 Halloween audio Wally was left off to the side and Barnaby was just “checking on him” while socializing (then again, this could be part of Barnaby understanding Wally & respecting his space / Wally wanting a break from that socialization). Barnaby is patient with Wally and yet he seems to sometimes treat Wally as his sidekick / let him fade into the background and yet Barnaby kept checking in on Wally during the 14 bug audios (this last one I could tie into the abandonment issues theory). 

Then there’s how Barnaby calls Wally kid & can tend to treat him like one despite both of them being in the same age group. The way that all of this could, in a way, relate to the infantilization of autistic people (no matter how well-meaning or unintentional) & internalized ableism. 

Note: Riv pointed out that Barnaby does seem to be doing the best with what he has, and that this can connect to the Johari Window’s blind spot / unknown. 

I do agree with this wholeheartedly! And I have to mention that - and making a Very educated guess here - the interactions we’ve seen take place in the very late 60s / very early 70s, so Barnaby’s behavior towards Wally is actually pretty fucking stellar given the time period. We can’t expect him to be perfect or do everything / say everything right. That would be boring I think! And one thing I deeply appreciate about the Neighbors & their dynamics is that they feel like real layered people, not cardboard cutouts being perfect caricatures of what people are “supposed” to be like.

Riv also presented this:

We likely are going to reach a point where Wally asks Barnaby something that he can’t / doesn’t want to / won’t answer. And like.. Ok. This is a slight tangent but I swear it’s related! When I first discovered WH and learned the Wally basics, I wondered two things.

Are we going to watch Wally “discover” new emotions? Because he certainly has them. Clown has said that Wally only ever feels happy, and a lot of people took that to mean that Wally can’t feel anything else. I don’t think we should take that answer at face value, because. I mean. Look at the project & creator we’re talking about. Layers, guys. Indirect direct answers. I think that Clown meant that Wally only ever feels happy in the Neighborhood because he has no reason to feel any negative emotion. Everything is as it should be. Until it isn’t - and I think that’s where he’s going to have to struggle with new emotions as he encounters them through new situations/events unfolding as the “story” starts to deteriorate. We’ve actually seen this a little bit - in Wally’s record audios (i believe the chronological second to last?), the way he says “Let Me In” so insistently. That’s definitely not a positive emotion being expressed. 

How will the topic of death be handled - because it will be handled, it’s stated in the project warnings. I was wondering this even before I read the list, because I was presented with a blank slate puppet character and so went “oh fuck, this dude doesn’t know about death, does he?” Obviously I wanted to know how that would go. I want to know how it Will go! 

How would Barnaby explain emotions that Wally doesn’t know how to convey? How would Barnaby explain death in a way that Wally would understand - given that Barnaby (& all the Neighbors sans Wally) knows what death is  - and would Barnaby be willing to explain such a thing? I have a feeling we may find out.

And in a way, I suspect that if none of them know, Wally will find out himself and have to process it without help. But then again, how can something die if it was never really alive in the first place? Unless the death warning relates to human characters… I’m currently assuming it relates to both humans and puppets. 

In conclusion: Barnaby has a carefully fabricated facade, he's doing the best with what he has but it likely won't be enough, and uh. shits fucked!

[tainted-sweet-meats]

More oc lore from my fursona's universe "We are, as I am" this time of Nishou the Doppelgänger. Definitely read tags before clicking the click more for his info. Read more of his info under the cut vvvvvv

Full name: Nishou S. Coding: Jamaican/Chinese Gender/ sexuality: Masc/ Pansexual Pronouns: He/Him Size: 6"3' Species: Doppelganger BirthPlace/Birthday: ???(Never born but created) Zodiac Sign: ???

Voiceclaim:N/A (supernatural/distorted voice is bolded)

Speech quirk

" You are the worst of us and I'm the better of you.....there is no reason for your existence.." " You never say what's on your mind..maybe that's why you're always in trouble..pity you, it couldn't be me...I know how to get what I want and how to destroy what I don't need." "Did you hate yourself so much..that you cast me out..now look at you..a lesser..than what we both are...what we both could of been....I'LL ALWAYS HATE YOU." "One day I will devour you and when that day comes.. I'll make it enjoyable for the both of us.. remember...our oath...blood in..and blood out..right..."

personality music

N/A

General info

Nishou is the forced out utmost extreme negatives and positives of Nish, the best and worst. He was originally a part of them but grew tired of how placid Nish was with themselves. He is the pent-up aggression of all they were throughout their life joined together. He is blunt and doesn't hold back from anyone or anything. His words are as visceral as his fangs and he's proud of the handy work his jaws can do, metaphorically and physically.

Despite his high aggression he also has a high passion and a dual personality. This is also believed to be a product of Nish hiding most of their feelings in situations resulting in unintentionally creating a personality for their doppelganger. Unlike the original, Nishou is not lovey-dovey and seeks passion through intimacy in the most primal of ways. Due to his ferocity, they can confuse the lust for the flesh.. for the hunger they yearn for and easily make quick work out of lovers. Very contradictory to their original that seeks love but can never act on it.

Though consuming their lovers isn't the same as taking their original's place in life. It is an easy way to sate the hunger and craving to fully feel like their original in some twisted way. To Nishou their original stands in his way to having an actual presence in life. It is very well known that a doppelganger must kill their original in order to take their place. To take the originals, they have to consume their heart. And in doing so, living the life he could never live through theirs.

Stand-alone they seem intimidating, harsh, and overly confident. He is the only one to assume many forms, the feral, anthro, were, beastrial, a penghou, as well as a semi humanish creature called Final fatalis. The original can not assume the last three forms. These forms are solely for the doppel. The last tree forms are said to be transitional forms of his supernatural powers. Forms slowly define him farther away from his original vessel. The humanoid form is his strongest out of the bunch. You can tell the doppel is present by the eyes. Only he has red and blue eyes swirling in rings. He could never mimic the original's eyes for some reason. Something having to do with the lack of their soul contained within the heart. Which is what he has to consume from his original vessel to take the life back he helped create.

Though Nishou is not evil, he is the product of the original vessel. When the original could not confront internal struggles with themself, it caused a rift creating him. Nish's subconscious cast him out of their body by throwing up a supernatural black substance that formed Nishou. When formed he was hateful to be abandoned instead of accepted. He formed.....resentful...distorted and vowed to devour every aspect of Nish to regain some peace in his lack of sanity. Which he is slowly losing the more time he remains out of the original's body on his own. He knows only the extremes of the original and acts according to his basic instinct. He believes full heartily when you betray your true self, your real self will be vengeful to regain what it helped you build. You can never escape yourself.

Powers

Slit split- A power only useable in his final and stable form known as "Final Fatalis". A supernatural power where he will slit his wrists to cause the black substance that makes up his very being, to create physical puppet-like replicas of his past forms. These forms can retain memory and take heavy damage in battle. The puppets can be killed but all memory is gained back to the doppel. The damages done, work as a memory function. The doppel will absorb the pain inflicted, which causes the final form to be invincible, indestructible, and distorted over time. This distortion is permanent to him.

Heart inflict-  The more time the doppel spends outside the original's body can cause deterioration effects on him entirely. Heart inflict allows him to devour the hearts of those who love or lust after him to keep him stable. This extends the time he has in the physical realm in order to consume the heart he needs to live his life in absolution. The original's heart is what's needed to be fully alive and of the physical realm the original vessel inhabits. Any heart he devours must have the initial intent in wanting him. Though the want doesn't always have to be positive towards him. To the doppel, even if the meat is soured by unjust distortion, meat is all the same to him.

Shadow waltz-  Is a teleportation power. The doppel can walk through shadows, even your own. The doppel however does not have a shadow himself. He uses the shadows around him to his advantage. This power can also detect energy. Once in your presence, the doppel is very calculating to not only you but the energy you give off. This makes it easier for him to teleport to your location to find you in an instant.

Vanta pressure- The same feeling you get when you are in the presence of a shadow person or anything paranormal, is the same presence the doppel gives off. This particular move also can cause paralysis when the doppel is tired of hunting you. If you are in close range, your movements cease. Once you stare into his eyes, you will feel the pressure that slowly tears down your emotional and physical barriers. At this point, you are powerless against him and he will devour you.

Catalyst break- This power is used constantly. The doppel can take in high amounts of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual damage. The more he takes in abuse/damage.. the stronger he gets. There isn't much that can hurt him since he isn't exactly physical yet. Though this power has side effects. The more power used against him, the more he has to consume to stay stable. This sometimes means friends may be on the menu.

Dream Inflict- When trying to keep a low profile, he can actually tamper with your dreams and cause you mental harm that will reflect on you physically. In this state you are fully powerless because once he has broken your mind you are done for.  The harm he has done to you in your dreams will reflect on your body in the physical. He can use this power to his advantage in a non violent manner as well to just talk with you. Though many will assume it is a vivid or lucid dream.

Vanta Canon- A flameless thrower attack that can rot the flesh off of bones. This attack is in fact not flames but the same creational fluid that acts like an acidic blast through the mouth. The fluid is a focus of acidic trauma distortion once held within the original vessel. Once said trauma was absorbed by the doppel to protect the original vessel when they were in one body, he focused it into a physical attack. The mock flame is the purest form of black and can deteriorate someone from their very core consciousness. 

But not before replaying said victim of said attack to relive all their life's trauma through their minds eye. Before melting  slowly to death. Ripping you entirely from existence not just in a physical sense. This attack isn't used lightly since its one of the doppel's most vindictive and hate filled attacks. You must of did something horrible/personal to bring this upon you.

Vanta Dismantle - Not many know beyond the original vessel, but it is very wise to not cause any splitting injuries to the doppel. This attack can only be used if the doppel is split in half. He can never fully split and usually the split will stop near his pelvis. He is very dangerous in this mode and can use his internal liquids as hardened weapons before he regenerates his body back in place. Unlike the original vessel, the doppel has no internal organs, bones, muscles or anything. What he has is a creational black fluid that can be molded at his will. He can even trap you within the middle of his split body which can easily crush you to death..leaving zero traces behind. Though when absorbed into him due to his supernatural link...all traces, memory, and you as a whole cease to exist. He can not feed off of you using this attack.

Minor miscellaneous powers such as:

Hyper regeneration

Supernatural strength

Imperceptibility

Psionics

Voice manipulation

Immortality

Inaudible movement

Haunting

Darkness Aura

Darkness Empowerment

Darkness Manipulation

Enragement triggers:

High-frequency noises

Reacting physically violent towards him

Weakness

His original vessel showing self love/forgiveness

Connection to Self-Nishou has retained all information and memories from Nish, and uses them against his original vessel. While what he says isn't exactly wrong, it is presented as aggressive, angered, and distorted. They have seen through the eyes and sorted through the feelings of the original when they were once one in body and mind. With his forked bluntness, they verbally lash at his original with their shortcomings. Using family, friends, relationships, and life traumas against them. To show without him they would have been dead in their teenhood.

Reminding them it was him who kept the noose from around their neck for so long. It was him who broke the rope at the last minute when they tried. An how ungrateful they are for abandoning him when they felt he wasn't needed or would cause hardships in their life. Nishou knows every aspect and every hole the original tries to hide to seem strong. The strength was all him and only his doing. He reminds the original vessel.."It's easy to hide from others but not from one's self".. and he makes sure the original never forgets it.

----

Friendship with a Doppelganger

Though he knows loyalty and values it, unlike their original he is quick to pick up on the lack of it. The minute you let slip you have ulterior motives you are as good as dead. He plays the dance of course. He lets you believe you didn't slip. He enjoys watching you lie, just to see how far you're willing to go. You feel some form of false safety as he still shows you loyalty while you show deceit.

He likes the game even if you aren't aware of it. The minute you initiated it by lying and trying to use him. He doesn't gain much other than fun and quick blood from the play you started. Unlike his original, it's not above him to be vindictive. In fact he takes pleasure in it by giving you pay back. He is very eye for an eye in that mind set. A head space the original vessel quickly abandoned deeming it a toxic trait. An thus the doppel adapting it, seeing it useful to those who sought to harm or use him.

He is the extremes of his original..so like his malice and hate..his love is equally so. Turning on him or using him will hurt him severely, but he will never show it. He doesn't understand forgiveness, because he can't even forgive his original, which in turn he can not forgive himself. He simply will get rid of you permanently to stop the pain you have caused him. He knows no other way to cope with emotional pain of betrayal and abandonment.

----

Spot the difference

Nishou has a distinct look. While he is Nish's doppelganger, his markings are more pronounced and jagged. His demeanor is a bit more serious, aggressive, and forthcoming. He always seems to have a scowl on his face or an expression of hunger and happy malice. He has a swirl to his eyes that seems hyper-focused and intense. Though this is an assumed adaptation so you can not focus on his eyes, since he believes that the eyes are a window to his inner workings.  Thus he feels if you can't focus on his eyes it will not leave him open to vulnerabilities. He is the only one able to assume many forms. His height is also way taller than the originals. Unlike their original..they can not bleed red, only black. They were never born...but created. So they do not have flesh and blood like their original does. Everything about them is an intense mimicry. Nish has a bit softer quality in looks and markings, they also do not carry the intense bearded chin fluff. They can be seen with a solemn or emotional face. Though they can be serious in the face it is never the same as their Doppel. Nish's eyes are just red with a hint of blue.

Face to Face-Nishou when confronted with Nish is highly volatile and aggressive. He tries to kill and devour them to claim a life he feels he helped create. And in a sense he did. Without him or his ferocity..his original could not have made it in life when he was a part of them. Nish fears their masculinity more than anything. He represents a part of them they try to hide and destroy to be accepted by their loved ones. Unbeknownst to the fact trying to rid yourself of yourself breeds hatred within self. This hatred bred their doppelganger's personality throughout their growth. They forever are in turmoil with each other until Nish accepts them or succumbs to them.

If Nish shows Nishou any form of love...he seems to be in pain and tries to get away from their original. Being created and cast out from their original's body has caused a jaded mind set. When confronted with affections and acceptance, he doesn't know how to react. He will either run from them or try to injure their original to stay away.

----

Nishou's representation

He is the physical manifestation of the extreme fear of the original vessel accepting their repressed shunned masculinity within themselves. An a physical representation of the original vessel's childhood through the eyes of manipulation and abuse. He is the warped aggression that has been done to the original vessel from their parental units, trusted loved ones, life experiences and harsh environmental adaptation. His actions with lovers is a severed hate for toxic masculinity in a relationship from experience of the original vessel's dating habits in past men. 

These relationship natures are twisted into extreme vulgarities that are not normal. Usually the devouring of the flesh in a carnal manner is symbolic to giving oneself entirely both in body and emotions for the sake of another. An getting nothing but desecration in return. This repressed feeling is the unrequited love the original endured up until their early 20's. At this time Nishou was cast out from their body.

He is the only one from the two that can assume a multitude of forms. It is believed by the original vessel that this multi-transitional process of Nishou, is representations they helped create through self repressed feelings and trauma.

The feral, a form both have which represents basic and lesser instincts of mental adaption to situational issues. The Feral form is known as the emotional shield. It is a form used commonly to avoid emotional backlash within self. To see him in this form is to realize you are being monitored and if you can be trusted. In this form, he doesn't fully trust you. It is a neutral form towards anyone and everyone.

The anthro, is also known as the physical shield. Is a form that is the most mocking to the original vessel due to variations of similarities to Nish. The only difference is this form is bigger than the original. As well as markings being slightly more jagged and rougher in look. The rough look is believed to be akin to Father. This is the form the original vessel always wanted but could never have due to the fear of backlash from loved ones. This is also the most common form to see him in.

The were, otherwise known as the mental shield. This form is the unchecked repressed brutality of the original vessel. Unlike the beastrial, the doppel's were form is highly aware mentally. Something the original can not control in their form. It is unknown why Nishou can mentally be in control while in this state though. It's believed the were is more a form originally for the doppel. The were being a physical manifestation of a mental safeguard to emotional pain and abuse, when he was still within the body of the original vessel. It is believed that once he was cast out from the original, Nish could still resume their form but lacked mental clarity like the doppel. Since it was his form to originally achieve. A form he shared with the original vessel to overcome mental trauma from others.

The penghou, known as the trauma shield, is a form only the doppel can achieve. This form is said to be the head of a humanoid man and the body of a canid. This form is believed to be a representation of the original's repressed fear of accepting themselves due to parental resentment. The eyes in the mane are a form of paranoia developed from Mother always asserting dominance in their offspring's life. The eyes themselves are the colors of  Mother's eyes. A constant reminder of being watched and stigmatized for trying to achieve being one's true self without her toxic help. This state like the beastrial is semi transitional. Unlike the other transformations, there is something eerily humanoid about this form.

The penghou is the doppel's most intense form. The doppel in this state is highly vengeful due to being abandoned by the original vessel. While the doppel is a manifestation of self-hatred entirely, the penghou is a distorted result of primal aggression to oneself through parental abuse. For favoring what others think before what the original vessel thought of themselves. It is known to mimic voices of those the original trusts in order to coax the original to get closer to harm them. The black ooze from this beast is the same creational sludge that helped form him. This fluid is highly toxic and if bitten could mean certain death. This fluid is what makes up the doppel's body and is also what he bleeds.

The beastrial, known to be the transitional shield. It is a were stuck in mid shift. It is believed this form only happens when the doppel is in a high aggressive emotional state. While it rarely happens, when it does Nishou is not in his right state of mind and will even harm friends without a second thought. This form could be forced out as a retaliation of the original vessel trying to accept themselves as well as their doppel. Another theory to this form is the original vessel's lack of trust for those who actually care for them. It is well known the original vessel holds no trust despite having others trust in them. 

This residual is warped within the doppel entirely into something more physically aggressive. Thus the lapse in judgment in this form for turning on those who may actually love them, lumping said friends in with those who hold ill will towards them. This is the only form to also semi resemble "Mother". He is more feline than he is vulpine in looks in this state. Depending on the emotional state, the face of said form can vary.

This form holds no empathy nor time for negotiation within reasonable sensibility. It is all terror and all hatred from both the humanoid and beast in its utmost form. In this form he can no longer speak human tongue and  regresses back into its most primal of languages. It's instinct is to destroy and kill everything that has harmed it and everything that is in its way, be it friend or foe. He will not show mercy in his wake and this form can not be halted until what ever caused this shift  is destroyed or far within reach to be seen or sniffed out.

This form is easily irritable and highly sensitive to noise of high pitches and low baritones. Sudden noises that irritate them can send him off in a rage. [No images at this time, they aren't scanned oh lazy me :p]

The humanoid, is the last and strongest form of the doppel. It is known to no longer be a shield form for the original vessel, but a form fully for the doppel. An offense form known as "Final Fatalis". Surprisingly even compared to his were or beastrial form, this form's strength is unimaginable. In this state the doppel is impenetrable and can not be harmed in any manner. This is the fully transitioned form of the doppel. In this state he is known to even shift out animalistic parts to his advantage at will. Though he keeps a lot of his markings and animal attributes, his face is no longer animal. The original vessel has no known defense against this form.

The humanoid is very large, hyper-aware, and at best unpredictable. They have a natural charm that can allure anyone to them unintentionally. The semi-humanoid is also alluded to have supernatural powers. Such as being able to teleport within and through darkness, pick up emotional intent, hyper-physical and emotional regeneration, high pain tolerance, and strike fear into those who challenge him with a simple glance. One of his most powerful tactics is splitting his skin open to release some of his black creational sludge to replicate walking puppets of his previous forms to do his bidding. They hold all powers of said form while sharing a mental link with him since they are him. Just now weaponized extensions. These puppets have blackened eyes, unlike his swirled eyes.

Nishou is a physical walking vessel of the original's self-hatred. His very imagery is a mockery of what the original could have been had they loved themselves, before pleasing and loving others. Though due to being forcefully shunned, Nishou has distorted from what he once was. This creature is walking self-hatred manifested as a doppel. Each form represents multiple pieces of the original's traumas and not being able to confront them to accept self.

Relationships- It's rare to see Nishou in a committed relationship-type setup like it is to see Nish in one. Nish can be seen holding their heart away from their partner or lovers constantly. There is a lack of trust to fully give themselves to a partner while still showing love fully. A huge contradiction but doable only by Nish. However, this is a glimmer of Nishou's nature still within them. When it comes to friends, they can be confident and flirty.

 But don't mistake it for the commitment of a lover. You will never get this from them and they will make sure you never get this close to them. You will always feel something is off while dating them. While you feel loved, there is a slight distance, as if the minute you mess up they will disappear from your life as if they were never there. There is some truth to your feeling. It is not that they don't love you, they do. What they will not lose is themselves over you. They don't value you enough to put themselves in that predicament. This is a unique residual of what their Doppel left behind within them. There is a huge fear within Nish that they will lose themselves entirely within you. They already regret casting their doppel out, they do not want to lose anything else with what little they have left of themselves. This part is their heart. An organ the doppel is believed to be missing. The only perk to them having fun with you is your safety is 100% guaranteed. Unlike their doppel, where you are walking on eggshells due to their extreme natures. An a potential threat of death if you cross the doppel emotionally.

[corroded-hellfire]

So, that Birthday Girl fic...could we get a follow-up called Birthday Boy about Reader exploring Eddie's kinks on his birthday? Love you to the moon and back xoxoxoxo @munson-blurbs 💚

Here you go, my friend! It's my first time writing sub!Eddie so I hope I did some justice to this request. I love you toooo!

In the same universe as Birthday Girl

Warnings: smut, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it up), oral f receiving, sub!eddie, Dom!reader, I think that’s it?

Words: 3.9k

Eddie never liked to make a big deal out of his birthday, even though he loved to make a whole special day for yours. It didn’t seem fair, so when Eddie told you he didn’t really want anything for his birthday, you just raised an eyebrow at him. You know growing up his family didn’t have a lot of money, meaning celebrating his birthday never came with a big hoopla. But now that you’re older and have both of your paychecks contributing to the comfortable living situation you have in your apartment, it’s time he let you spoil him. 

Obviously, you knew his favorite cake was Funfetti and you had all the ingredients ready to make it. Eddie still wouldn’t budge on giving you any gift ideas, though. So, you’ll have to improvise. Shopping at the mall doesn’t really help you at all. The last store to explore is Spencer’s, and you didn’t have a whole lot of hope you’d find something in there for him either. And you’re right, you don’t – but you do get a spark of inspiration when you see a pair of furry handcuffs hanging on a display wrack. The ones that Eddie used as a belt buckle in high school are in your apartment somewhere, probably Eddie’s dresser. Those could come in handy.

Eddie’s not shy, that’s for sure. So you had definitely noticed when he became more subdued whenever the subject of sex came up lately. At first you could just write it off as him having a bad day at work. But when it happens a second and third time, you know there was something to it. You two were still having sex. A lot of it, actually, and it was really good. But he seemed to clam up whenever it was talked about. 

One night as he went to tug your sleep shorts off, you stopped him and asked if he wanted to talk about anything. He looked confused, wondering why this popped into your head while he was trying to undress you. You told him that you noticed how he had been acting and that you wanted to help him. The fact that he seemed embarrassed baffled you. Eddie? Embarrassed? You’d never even heard those two words in the same sentence before. 

Finally, though, Eddie opened up and told you what had been on his mind. Sometimes when the two of you brought out the kinkier aspects while you were having sex, Eddie was good at dominating you. Telling you what to do, making you beg, things like that. And he loved doing that, he assured you, but he said that he thought he’d like to try a role reversal and see how it felt for you to be the dominating one. 

The fact that Eddie had become quiet over a kink he wanted to explore floored you. This man has never been shy about telling you anything before. But it seemed like this was part of the role he wanted to play in bed. The quiet, timid one who is told what to do and when to do it. And the more you thought about it, the more you liked the idea of it. So, seeing those furry handcuffs at Spencer’s reminded you that you had a whole other gift you could give Eddie for his birthday. You were still determined to find a physical gift, though. 

When Eddie comes home from work, you’re ready for him. He walks in the front door of your apartment and rolls out his neck. Teaching guitar brought him immense joy, but having to look down at his student’s fingers on the strings can take a toll on his neck after a long week. 

“Babe?” Eddie calls into the apartment. He shrugs his leather jacket off and hangs it on the peg near the door. “You home?”

“Bedroom.”

Eddie raises his eyebrows at your tone. It wasn’t you calling out to let him know where you were, it was a demand. He kicks his boots off and heads down the hall. When he pokes his head into your room, he doesn’t see you at first. Then he glimpses you near the closet and steps inside.

“Hey, baby,” he says, but stops short when he sees what you’re wearing. The cropped Corroded Coffin tee is something he’s seen you wearing many times before but seeing you in only that and a black thong has his brain malfunctioning. “Happy birthday to me indeed.”

Determined not to get flustered lest it take away from the domineering effect, you jut your hip out to the side, trying to stave off the heat you feel rising to your cheeks, and hold up your index finger that has Eddie’s handcuffs dangling from it. 

Your boyfriend shoots you a smirk and steps forward to take them from you, assuming you’ll be the one confined by them. But with a quick twist of your wrist, you have one of the cuffs securely around Eddie’s wrist.

“Uh, what?” Eddie asks.

“I think you should be the one getting cuffed tonight, birthday boy.” You grab the bottom of his black Dio t-shirt and lift it over his head, assisting him in getting the clanging cuffs untangled from the material as well. When your eyes flicker down to his pants, Eddie takes the hint and rides himself of his jeans and boxers as well. “Bed. Now.”

The immediate change of demeanor in Eddie would be subtle to anyone else, but you notice all the little details that add up to this submissive version of your boyfriend. His chin has tucked in, shoulders slightly hunched, making himself seem smaller as he peers at you from underneath his thick eyelashes. But he still doesn’t move. You take a step closer and yank him forward by the waistband of his jeans. “I said now.”

Eddie turns from you to get on the bed, sitting on the foot of it and looking at you with his wide doe eyes. 

“Good boy. Now lay back.” He does as he’s told, and you can’t help but smirk. “Get your ass up there so I can hook the cuffs through the headboard.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

You wrinkle your nose at the term. It reminds you too much of work. 

“I don’t think I like that name, baby.” Eddie obediently raises his arms above his head, and you straddle his hips to secure the cuffs through the wooden slats of the headboard, then lock his other wrist in the metal. “Any other names you might wanna call me?”

Eddie's shy expression and the fact that he looks everywhere but your face tells you that there is.

“Come on, sweetie. Tell me.” When he stays quiet, you lean down and grab a hold of his chin, forcing him to look you in the eye. “I won’t ask again.”

“My goddess,” Eddie squeaks out and the words go straight between your legs. 

“Yes,” you say, eyes going wide as you momentarily slip out of the character, admiring the name. How much you’d enjoy being called that. Eddie’s goddess. It’s clear he’s pleased that you like the name as well, his hips wiggling underneath where you’re sitting on top of him. 

Leaning down, you press soft kisses along Eddie’s neck. He lets out a content hum and lets his eyes slip closed. You sink your teeth into his skin, causing him to yelp and open his eyes.

“Keep your eyes on me,” you warn him. 

“Y-Yes, my goddess,” Eddie says, the black of his eyes swallowing the brown whole. 

“Good boy,” you praise, pressing a soft kiss over the bite mark you just left. Climbing off his body, you keep the kisses going lower and lower. You flick your eyes up to make sure Eddie’s still watching you, and he is like the good boy you want him to be. But you notice his teeth digging into his bottom lip. With a frown, you reach up and ease his poor bitten lip free.

“Wanna hear all your pretty noises, birthday boy.”

As if only waiting for your permission, small whines and whimpers start to fall from Eddie as you continue the soft kisses down his body. When you trace your tongue down his happy trail, Eddie’s hips buck. 

“I’m sorry,” he’s quick to say. The wide, imploring eyes he’s looking down at you with almost makes you break character and assure him it’s okay. But that’s not what he wants. 

“If it happens again, I’m going to stop,” you warn him. 

“Yes, my goddess.”

Throwing him another warning look, you pepper light pecks down his shaft, starting to enjoy the feeling of being in charge like this. The sound of the handcuffs rattling against the wooden slats in the headboard has you glancing up to see tears flooding Eddie’s eyes, which has your heart plummeting. He knows you and is able to read your face immediately, so before you can even open your mouth, he speaks.

“Green. Green light,” he assures you.

Taking a breath to calm yourself, you nod, and go back to giving feather light touches to Eddie’s cock. The moment your tongue darts out to lick at the dot of precum beading at the head, his hips snap up again, forcing you to pull your mouth away entirely.

“What did I tell you?” you ask.

“That-That if it happens again, you’ll stop,” he answers sheepishly. 

“That’s right, baby.” You sigh and sit back on your heels. “Gonna put you to work now.”

“Work?” he asks, voice wobbling. When thinking of what you could do to make Eddie’s birthday surprise even more special, you recalled one thing that your boyfriend always tried to talk you into doing. It’s not that you didn’t want to, it just made you feel a little self-conscious. 

“Mhmm,” you hum as you crawl up his body. “Now you’re just going to have to lay there while you bring me pleasure.”

Eddie’s brow crinkles as he thinks, but when he realizes what you mean, his face lights up. Quickly, he tries to tamper down the joy on his face to stay more in his role.

“You’re going to sit on my face, my goddess?”

“I am. And you’re going to make me cum, right?”

“Yes,” he says, nodding his head emphatically. “I promise, I’ll make you feel so good.”

All you do is raise an eyebrow at him before you strip yourself of your thong and situate yourself, which takes a little maneuvering with his arms secured above his head. Thighs holding your core right above his mouth, you feel the flutter of nerves in your stomach. Your loving boyfriend, as attuned to you as ever, can sense your trepidation.

“Please?” Eddie whimpers. The pure want in his voice has you lowering yourself onto his mouth, his hot tongue instantly gliding between your folds. You grip the headboard for stability, a gasp leaving your lips as Eddie’s sinfully skilled mouth works against your pussy. Knuckles turning white from holding the wood so tightly, you drop your head back and let out a string of moans mixed in with Eddie’s name. 

“Fuck, your mouth is perfect,” you say. He hums against you as he flicks his tongue over your clit, and the vibrations send a tantalizing shiver through your body. Eddie’s tongue pulls away and you hear him try to say something against your heat. It makes you giggle, and you raise yourself up.

“Come again?” You smirk at your own double entendre. 

“Want you to ride my face, my goddess. Use me.”

He doesn’t have to tell you twice. You lower yourself back to Eddie’s mouth and start to rock your hips forward. When your clit brushes against his nose, sparks flood your vision.

“God, you’re going to make me cum, baby,” you say as you keep rutting against his face. Eddie hums encouragingly beneath you, tongue lapping at your dripping core. “Ah, shit. I’m coming.”

Eddie helps you ride out your orgasm, moaning and licking as your hips finally come to a halt. With panting breaths, you pull yourself off of your boyfriend’s mouth and collapse down next to him. A smile is sewn onto your face as you close your eyes and try to catch your breath. When you turn your head and search for that warm brown gaze that you’re so fond of, you’re greeted by the sight of Eddie’s mouth and chin glistening from your release. 

“My goddess, you taste so good.”

Unable to help yourself, you push yourself up on an elbow and lean in to press your mouth against his. The taste of yourself invades your senses as you snake your tongue into his mouth.

“Mm, you’re right,” you hum against his lips. “Now, since you refused to listen to me before, you don’t get my mouth. But lucky for you, I want that big cock inside of me so bad.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see said cock twitch in anticipation. The poor thing has been neglected tonight. You were only touching it briefly before Eddie broke your rule, you were sitting on Eddie’s mouth, nowhere near his dick, and Eddie can’t even touch it himself because he’s cuffed to the bed. 

Pushing yourself up, you eye his red, aching dick as it stands proud and tall.

“Your cock is so pretty, Eddie,” you tell him, making it twitch again. A self-satisfied smirk comes to your face as you move yourself down the bed and straddle Eddie’s abdomen, just close enough where his cock brushes up against your back, but not hard enough to provide him with any relief. Looking down at his face, it’s flushed red and pinched into a pout. Softly, you rub a hand up and down his chest. “I wanna hear you say it.”

“Say what, my goddess?” Eddie asks, voice cracking over the question.

“That your cock is pretty.”

His face turns even redder and he turns to try and bury his head in his arm. A sharp pinch to his nipple has him turning back to you with a small yelp. 

“Look at me. And tell me your cock is pretty.”

“My c-cock is pretty,” Eddie lets out in a breathy moan. His eyes don’t leave yours. 

“Again.”

“My cock is pretty.”

“Yes, it is,” you say, a smile curling on your lips. “It’s so pretty and it deserves some attention, don’t you think?”

“Yes.” Eddie nods his head, tongue darting out to lick over his lips. 

You push yourself back so you’re hovering over his cock, but not touching it at all.

“Tell me, baby,” you purr. “Who makes you feel good?”

“Y-You do, my goddess.” 

His reward is you slowly sinking yourself down on his throbbing cock. 

Eddie whines, going to bite his lip, but he remembers that you want to hear him, so he just lets the sounds of pleasure flow freely from his mouth. Once you’re fully seated on him, his cock stretching you out in the most delicious way, you brace your hands on his chest and begin to lift your hips. By the way Eddie’s fists are clenched against the headboard and the way his cock is twitching against your walls, you know he’s not going to last long. Might as well have some fun with it, you figure.

“You like it? Feels good?” you ask.

“S’so good,” Eddie says. 

“Tell me how it feels, my birthday boy.”

No sound comes from Eddie’s mouth, even though it’s hanging open and his glossy brown eyes are trained on you. He must sense you’re about to scold him, because he starts sputtering out sounds before he can finally manage words.

“Feels so tight,” Eddie moans. “You’re so damn tight, my goddess. So warm. So wet.” 

His words have you rocking your hips a little faster, clit rubbing against the patch of coarse dark curls at the bottom of Eddie’s happy trail. 

“Tell me again,” you say, eyes slipping closed. “Who makes you feel like this?”

“You,” Eddie says through a whimper. “Only you. You’re the only one who can make me feel this good.”

“That’s right,” you say, grinding your hips down harder against Eddie’s. “You’re all mine. You belong to me.” 

“I’m yours,” Eddie agrees, eyes slipping closed in pleasure. “All yours.”

“No other pussy can do this. Make you almost cry,” you say, on the verge of taunting. 

“Don’t want any other pussy,” Eddie says, his curls bouncing as he shakes his head on the pillow. “Just this perfect pussy. Your perfect pussy, my goddess.” 

When Eddie opens his eyes, you can see the fucked out expression on his face. He’s so close, you can feel it. 

“Look at me while you come, baby,” you say. Obediently, his eyes lock on yours, and the way his abdominal muscles tighten up under your hands lets you know he’s about to come. Desperate the chase your release at the same time as him, you speed up your hips, the friction against your clit sending you spiraling.

“I’m gonna come too, baby,” you tell him. “Come with me. Like a good boy, yeah?”

“Uh huh,” Eddie moans out, nodding as he keeps his eyes locked on yours. 

“Okay, sweetheart,” you say, the beginnings of your orgasm crashing over you. “Let go.”

It’s all Eddie needs to hear as his hips stutter up into yours, his warm seed coating your spasming walls. Your bodies keep moving against one another as you ride out the storm. Once you start to feel overstimulated, you still your hips and drop down to Eddie’s chest, both of you panting as you try and catch your breath. 

“Holy shit, babe,” Eddie says once he’s able to. “That was so fucking hot.”

“Yeah?” you look up at him through your eyelashes. “You liked it? I mean, it was only my first time doing it. So, you can tell me what you liked and didn’t like, and I can do better.”

Instinctively, Eddie goes to cup your face in his hands, but he’s still cuffed to the bedpost. 

“Can you let me go?” Eddie asks with a laugh.

“Hmm, what if I lost the key?” you ask with a smirk. The pair of you wince in unison as you pull yourself off of Eddie, both of you sticky from your combined releases 

“Then I guess you’ll just have to feed me and bathe me. Doesn’t sound so bad, actually,” Eddie says with a shrug.

You giggle and pull the key out of the top drawer of your nightstand. 

“You gotta let me rub your arms, baby,” you say as you unlock the first cuff. Eddie lets out a grateful sigh as he slowly lowers his arm down. 

“I’ll never say no to one of your massages,” he says. His other arm falls free from the cuff, and he lets out a small groan as he brings that arm down as well. 

Putting the cuffs and key back in their proper drawer, you then turn to your dresser and snatch up your bottle of lotion.

“Ooh, is that the one that smells like chocolate?” he asks.

“Hot cocoa, yes, sir,” you say as you pop open the lid. Eddie scoots back so he’s settled against the headboard as you squeeze a dime sized amount of lotion into your palm. 

Eddie’s whole body seems to relax as you work the sweet-smelling lotion over his skin, using your fingers to dig into the sore muscles, trying to stimulate more blood flow there. The moans that leave his lips aren’t sexual, but you can feel a stirring between your legs, nonetheless. 

Once that arm is nice and loosened up, you crawl over to Eddie’s other side and have the same treatment to that arm. Eddie’s eyes are closed, and his head is relaxing back against the wall. 

“Sleepy, baby?” you ask.

“Not really,” he answers. “You’re just relaxing me.”

“Too relaxed for cake?”

His eyes shoot open at that, turning his head to look you in the eye. “Um, never.” It makes you giggle, and you toss the bottle of lotion onto your dresser. 

“Let’s have some of that Funfetti then, baby,” you say, pushing yourself off the bed.

“Just one thing first,” Eddie says as he gets up as well.

“And what’s that?” you ask.

There’s that mischievous glint in his eye again; the one that drives you absolutely wild.

“As much as I love seeing you wearing Corroded Coffin clothes, I like seeing what’s underneath it even more.” He tugs on the bottom of your crop top, and you take the hint to shuck it off. Eddie’s eyes drop immediately to your chest, and it sounds off a round of butterflies in your stomach. 

“Now I’m ready for cake,” he says. 

He follows you out into the kitchen and watches as you get the cake out of the refrigerator, arranging the multicolored candles on top. You’re careful when lighting them not only because you don’t want your hair to get in the way, but you’re also naked and any wax or fire would hurt like hell. 

“Get over here, you,” you say, opening your arms for your boyfriend. He happily slides into your hold, and he rests his head on yours as you sing Happy Birthday to him. He squeezes his eyes closed as he thinks of a wish. Seemingly satisfied with what he’s come up with, Eddie leans in and blows all the candles out in one breath. 

“Happy birthday, baby,” you say, pressing a kiss to his lips.

“Thank you, my goddess.”

You giggle at the nickname, your cheeks getting hot.

“Let me give you your present.” 

Eddie’s eyes watch your ass the whole time as you walk over to the hall closet. You put the present down on the table next to the cake, and Eddie tilts his head as he inspects the package. It’s about the same dimensions as a pizza box and he honestly wouldn’t blame you if that’s what you bought him for his birthday since he gave you literally no ideas. 

His thick fingers tear into the red wrapping paper, discarding it to the other side of your small kitchen table. Well, it’s a box but not a pizza box. Just plain and white, giving no indication about what’s inside. Curiosity no longer willing to be patient, Eddie lifts the lid and ruffles through the few layers of tissue paper. His fingertips grace the material inside and he instantly knows what it is, without even having seen it. 

A grin grows on his face as Eddie picks up the article of clothing in his hands, bringing it out of the box and holding it up in front of him. The black leather jacket shines, the gleaming silver buttons catching the light in the kitchen and bouncing it off appliances. 

“Do you like it? I know you already have your favorite one, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to have two!”

Eddie sets the jacket down on the table, making sure to keep it away from the cake and its messiness. He places a hand on each side of your face and pulls your lips to his. 

“I love it. Thank you so, so much, baby.”

“You should try it on,” you tell him.

He picks it back up, inspecting the red lining as he sticks one hand in a sleeve.

“Won’t it look kind of weird that it’s the only thing I’m wearing?” Eddie asks as he slides the other arm through. 

“Oh, baby,” you say, taking a step back to admire your beautiful boyfriend clad in only a new leather jacket. “That just makes it even better.” 

[relaxxattack]

How would you go about writing a pitch relationship?

OKAY SO.

essentially, when you get really down to the wire about it, it's about respect.

the foundation of a pitch relationship needs to be some sort of respect, and equality. this seems kind of obvious at first, because, how the fuck are you meant to rival someone if you're not equal? if they're actually better than you, and they win every fight or challenge, that's a beatdown, it's not a rivalry.

the literal definition of rivalry itself implies that two things of equal chance attempt to succeed.

ID in alt text

they can't just be exactly mentally and physically identical, though, and it's possible for two parties to not be equal and have a healthy kismesissitude anyway-- as long as they consider themselves to be equals.

that's where respect comes in. one party may be completely unable to fight or fend off any attacker, and the other may be the strongest bodybuilder in the universe. and you could think to yourself, well clearly they aren't equal, because the bodybuilder could snap the weak one like a twig. but if these two people really had healthy pitch feelings for one another, they would exhibit in challenges that were not physical. perhaps these two people are equally terrible at video games. their rivalry could manifest around that.

the main thing that people know and remember about pitch romance is the fact that it's based on hatred and annoyance. this person should annoy the shit out of you, and that friction between you is what causes the tension for the relationship.

so, to write pitch romance, what you have to start with is two people who consider each other equal and also find each other annoying as hell. but you have to remember to keep in mind the respect aspect (hatred without respecting and being drawn towards someone is not romantic, it's just plain old hatred). you also need to keep in mind that the oblivious pining stage of a pitch romance can go on a long time, because a classic part of having pitch feelings for someone is not wanting to have them. because, how could you EVER have a thing for someone who bugs you so much?

now, when it comes to the actual relationship itself- once the two idiots start dating, that is- the main idea is that there's a push and pull. an ideal pitch romance is essentially an act of tug o' war between it's two parties. suppose in your general human flushed relationship, the two of you take turns planning date nights, to show your investment in the courting. in a pitch romance, it might be more like taking turns winning- if your pitch partner has just pulled an incredible prank on you, it is now your turn to come up with something even better to get back at them with. you can't be shown up by them! you want to win!

so writing the beginning of their relationship might involve a lot of dates that are essentially formal challenges. what these are of course depends on the characters themselves; nobody likes the same kind of dates and similarly nobody likes the same kind of pitch challenge. if the two parties have similar interests, like say they both enjoy gaming, you might pick that so they can sharpen their skills on each other and try to become better. if they have very different interests, perhaps they'd do something neither of them are super familiar with, in order to be on even footing (remember that equality is very important to a pitch relationship). however, if one member wants the other to learn how to do their favorite thing, e.g. fencing, perhaps they would train their kismesis, and the real challenge would come from seeing who can be more patient, the teacher or the student. there could be some real tension in not knowing whether your partner is going easy on you or not, but showing them you can work hard anyway.

that's what the honeymoon period would be like, in my opinion- tons of challenge dates and pranks, while the relationship is new and fun and fresh they're probably teasing each other all the time and trying to see what one can get better at than the other.

when it comes to later, deeper aspects of kismesissitude, an important function of a kismesis is to point our your faults. yes, they respect you, but of course at the end of the day they still hate you-- and the reason they hate you is because you're too much of an aggravating person to let your good qualities fully come through. if one of your flaws is seriously fucking up your other abilities, it is the job of a kismesis to force you to notice this crack in your armor, so that you can get back to meeting them on equal ground.

for example, if your battle moves are becoming predictable, maybe they block every single move you make in a fight and then tell you they saw it all coming, so that you know you need to work on your tells, or switch up your moves. you want to get better than your kismesis, and in a way you want to get better for them, because you want them to respect you and continue to stay in your relationship. this also applies to mental and emotional flaws; battle skills are just the easiest visual example.

important fact: a healthy kismesissitude, like any healthy romance, is good for both parties.

if one person is consistently getting beaten down by words and defeats by the other person, who refuses to let up, that is abuse. they are absolutely not on equal footing, and no one is getting better at anything- no rivalry is taking place. (a kismesis should only be pointing flaws that are actually harmful to you or others, and actually reasonably fixable. your inability to dodge a sword is something you can train to fix. being disabled for example, however, is not something you can train to fix. beating down on your for traits you cannot change is abuse, even if a kismesis thinks or claims they are well meaning.)

conversely, if someone begins to find their kismesis isn't strong enough or interesting enough to warrant challenging and fighting, that is relationship also unhealthy, and likely going to end soon. being bored with your kismesis means they aren't challenging you in your rivalry at all, in which case they need to get back on even footing- or perhaps you just aren't interested in them as a person, which means the romantic feelings are gone.

(consider, as examples of unhealthy pitch relationships that broke up: terezi and gamzee, in which the relationship seemed to exist mainly because of terezi's low self esteem, and vriska and eridan, who broke things off because vriska became bored of it.)

pitch relationships can be unhealthy, the same as flushed relationships. if the power dynamics are not equal, or there's some insane excusing of actions or abuse of power going on, that's not healthy. it can be interesting though if you're trying to write a pitch relationship gone wrong, but i'm going off the assumption that this anon was wanting my opinion of how to write a healthy and happy-ending pitch romance.

so that's sort of my thesis on how to write healthy and fun pitch romance-- there's a tug of war, a lot of respect, arguing, challenges, training arcs, banter, and exhilaration. oh and of course, what everyone who hears about kismesissitude first imagines- yes, there's hate-fucking. all of those physical fights where you try to beat your rival you're romantically into at stuff? obviously that's going to have a ton of sexual tension. erotically charged swordfights are where it's at.

enjoy writing :]

[cheekinpermission]

now, I know you don't ship your oc with anyone, buut- if you did, who'd it be????

I spent way too long on this question LMAO

Like anon pointed out, I don’t really ship Erin with anyone in particular mostly because I didn’t really write her to be with a canon character. She’s just trying not to die, honestly. But I’d be lying if I said I never imagined hypotheticals with her and some of the boys, so here’s the answer I settled on: tier list edition!

I’ll explain it a bit more in detail under the cut but there’s the short answer for anyone who wants to skip my rambling.

Ace x Erin

There is no universe in which Ace is not in love with Yuu, no matter what form they take.

Friends to lovers is a CLASSIC trope that I love dearly. Besides Grim (who is more like family anyways), Ace was Erin’s first friend! Ace and Deuce dropped their vacation plans to come and rescue them from Scarabia. He literally never shuts up about Erin and Grim when they’re separated. Ace has made two very suspicious requests to share a bed with Erin. Dude is down bad. And I love it <3

The reason he is so high up on the list and Deuce isn’t is simply because Ace and Erin have a lot more in common than Deuce and Erin. In fact, I’ve said once that she’s a female version of Ace in a lot of aspects and I still think that’s true. I could definitely see them as having a very fun and playful relationship, but still willing to drop everything to help the other if necessary. 

Realism: 2/10 

Sorry, Ace. You may like Erin, but Erin doesn’t like you. Not like that, anyway. Not now. Cough.

Azul x Erin

IT'S FOR THE MEMES!!!

I love Erin and Azul in much the same way as I love Jamil and Azul. The octopus boy pathetically pining after someone who wants nothing to do with him is so beautiful. Erin and Jamil would eat Azul for breakfast and he’d say THANK YOU. 

This is me rn:

Putting aside the rivals to lovers storyline that everyone loves, I do think they could make an absolute power couple. What does a scheming octopus need? An equally scheming wife at his side, of course! 

Realism: 0/10

Bro Erin hates him-

Kalim x Erin

This couple just makes my heart happy <3 

I’m obsessed with couples that are compliments of one another. They’re different, but different in a way that the other needs. Kalim’s ultimate downfall is his naivete and I think Erin offers a more grounded and rational approach to things. She’s more observant and cunning. Opposite to that, Erin would really benefit from someone as generous and kind hearted as Kalim is. Someone who is forgiving and willing to see the best in people, even when he’s been wronged. 

They’d be a good, healthy couple, and I love that for Erin. She deserves someone to make her happy and would want someone to make happy in return. 

Realism: 6/10

Erin appreciates Kalim’s positivity, especially since she’s surrounded by people who look down on her for not having magic and whatever else the cast rags on Yuu for. I’d certainly consider them friends in canon but not romantic. 

Vil x Erin

Fun fact: Erin canonically has a small crush on Vil. BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE SMOOCHED HER CHEEK IN BOOK 6! Erin is so affection starved that the simple act of a “thank you” kiss on the cheek was enough to make her develop a bit of a crush on him. It was never big enough to motivate her to want to date him or anything like that, but an attraction was there. 

Erin and Vil both have a similar appreciation for beauty. They both emphasize the value of hard work and self-improvement. They’re also both pretty strict on themselves to constantly be better than they were yesterday. Likewise, Erin isn’t too concerned with gender norms so Vil criticizing Epel for considering ballet “girly” won him a lot of points in her book. 

Just by virtue of Erin and Vil having a lot in common, I think they would make a cute couple. She’ll 100% sit down and be pampered and then turn around and do the same for him. Erin is naturally pretty charming and charismatic, so I could see her integrating well into celebrity culture. Erin also values her independence in a relationship and I don’t really see Vil as someone who would mind that too much. They’re both busy people with their own lives who can come together at the end of the day and that’s nice. 

Make room, Rook and Cater. Erin’s joining the Vil fan club. 

Realism: 7/10

They would be the most likely couple to work out, but I have no plans to make anything official.

I could see it 

This category includes characters that I think would either pair well with Erin or make for a fun ship. 

Ruggie and Floyd both give “partners in crime energy” that I think could be fun to play with. 

Malleus and Erin are interesting. Malleyuu is one of my favorite pairings, but for Erin specifically I wanted to deviate. I think it’d be more interesting if Malleus only liked Erin as much as he did simply because she was the first person to really give him the time of day as “Malleus” and not “future king of the briar valley and one of the most powerful mages in Twisted Wonderland”. If I were to write them a love story, I’d actually have Erin reject Malleus in Night Raven College. A few years later, they’d reunite after maturing and growing and fall in love as adults post-graduation. I think it’d be neat. 

(That being said, I wrote them as platonic friends LOL) 

Erin and Silver are appealing in the same way that Erin and Kalim are appealing, just to a lesser extent because I don’t see the same chemistry 

Maybe??

Erin and Deuce just give me sibling energy so it’s hard for me to want them to be together, but he’s not the worst option

Trey and Cater have the advantage of being Heartslabyul residents and I just envision Erin as being closer with them than most dorms because of Ace and Deuce

I think Rook could totally win Erin over with passionate displays of love if he was sincere about it. If he takes her hand and they dance in the square Rapunzel style and she’ll be falling fr 

Never really thought about it

Kinda self-explanatory. I never really explored their relationships with Erin in depth so I don’t really have an opinion of where I’d place them? 

Jack and Jamil seem too serious for Erin

Jade is just kinda there and freaks her out tbh

Epel and Erin would have to fight over his narrow view of gender norms

Erin and Idia are just TOO different in terms of extrovert to introvert. Ik some people really like those pairings but I don’t. I think pairings can be different, just not TOO different. (I’m also projecting because I’m an introvert and extroverts exhaust me LOL) 

Sebek is… Sebek

BLEGH 

Ortho is just a baby 

I don’t ever see it happening so i can’t say i ship them but i love him so we’ll call it wish fulfillment <3

It’s no secret that Riddle is my favorite character, so of course a part of me wants to like Erin and Riddle as a couple because then I could have him around more. 

They just don’t work in my head LOL 

I don’t think Erin would mind the rules so much, unless he started trying to make HER follow them. He can be as rule-abiding as he wants, but if he tries to tell her that she can’t put honey in her lemonade after 8 p.m… there’s gonna be a fight. 

On the OTHER hand, I think Riddle having a partner that can help him to enjoy life without the stress of following rules or the guilt of breaking on is super cute. Someone who could ease him into letting go of his need for rules, and who can reassure him when he inevitably slips up. Someone who can encourage him to stand on his own and to be confident in his own decisions outside of what a rule book dictates for him. Or, y’know, his mother. 

Riddle being the more reserved, caretaking one and Erin being the more spontaneous, fun-loving one...

Okay, wait, I might have to revisit them. (My bias may be showing.)

Illegal :)

Erin is 17. Leona is 20 and Lilia is, like, 700. Nope.

[wandabear]

EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY [CH 5] - WANDA MAXIMOFF X F!READER

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Summary:   Y/N proposes to Wanda and she says… no. That’s when things get complicated, too much.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x f!reader | Natasha Romanoff x oc ㅤㅤㅤ   

CHAPTER ONE CHAPTER TWO  CHAPTER THREE CHAPTER FOUR CHAPTER FIVE CHAPTER SIX - finale

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Warning:  Somewhat graphic MCU violence, death, ANGST and FLUFF. Mentions about abuse. As you know me: Jules is portrayed by Adelaide Kane. This mcu style is my own, Natasha Romanoff will not die here. She deserves to be happy.

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Songs for you: Ivy Willow

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤCHAPTER FIVE

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“Thank you, auntie Y/N.” Morgan Stark said with the most adorable smile as she walked hand in hand with y/n.

Y/N took care of the kid that day and together they toured the Compound while Tony finished signing some papers and chatted with Steve, trying to keep things at peace.

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After eating together one of the most delicious cheeseburgers and fries -Morgan's favorites-, she walked with her to the entrance where Tony and Steve were waiting for them.

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“Aw. You're welcome, sweetie.” The inhuman smiled and leaned in to receive little Morgan's hug. “Thank you for keeping me company today. I couldn't have done it without you.”

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“I love you, auntie Y/N. See you later!” Morgan smiled and ran over to her dad, who helped the kid get into the car and fasten the seatbelt. Steve stepped forward to go inside the compound, it was going to rain soon.

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Y/N smiled at Tony. “That girl is getting bigger and smarter, Tony. She's soon going to take our jobs.”

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“What can I say? I was part of the creation of this masterpiece.” Stark joked and both laughed.

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Here they were, years later, Tony became one of the few people left in her life. All the grudges of the past had been left behind.

Y/N kept hands in the pockets of her coat, watching the trees moving slowly.  This time it wasn't Y/N who summoned the storm.

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“You okay?” Tony took off his glasses, he seemed quite worried.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ “Yeah.”  Y/N sighed and shrugged. “Just tired, there are too many problems on this planet and universe to deal with.”

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“Well, that is now YOUR problem, but… You should eat better, kid, I see you a little pale.” Tony patted her shoulder and smiled, but still looked a bit worried.  “I'll tell Pepper and she's going to scold you. She will send you a cook to follow you everywhere, reminding you to eat.”

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Y/N giggled tiredly and nodded slowly. “Take care, Tony. Take care of them, you deserve it.”

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“If you need something…” He tried.

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“I'll work it out with Steve, Yelena or Bruce. You rest.”

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All these years Y/N had been practicing her powers with Jules, Bruce also helped her to understand herself a bit more. Over time she learned to control it almost perfectly.

Y/N possessed the ability of atmokinesis, one of the most powerful abilities in existence, where one can control and manipulate the various forms and aspects of the weather itself.

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Thor used to say that he was happy with the news, now he could share something so beautiful with a warrior like her. Summoning the most powerful lightning they have ever seen.

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Jules possessed the ability of nature manipulation, another of the most important powers. Although she mostly had developed much more control over plants and some living beings. According to her, they used to whisper to her. Y/N smiled when she remembered that moment, in that same place a few years ago. She used to tease Jules saying she was crazy, because the brunette once said that a sparrow insulted her.

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“Y/N… I swear, that bird called me a ‘shameless slut’ and he then flew away!” 

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“Yeah, sure, I will definitely never believe that.”

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Together, they were invincible. They could make total chaos as well as something very beautiful for this planet. Y/N's idea was to protect this world that was left, while Jules... well, remained a prisoner of her suffering.

Y/N went back into the Compound, stopping to look at that mural in front of her, mural recognizing those who had fallen.

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NATASHA ROMANOFF WANDA MAXIMOFF JAMES BUCHANAN ‘BUCKY’ BARNES CLINT BARTONSAMUEL WILSON

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Y/N stood still looking at the names, thinking about everything that happened all this time. She covered her face with her hands, the stress that Y/N felt lately was overwhelming.

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“So, Stark stopped by to say hi?”  Yelena walked over, this time she wasn't wearing her Black Widow outfit. She always knew how to dress in style, maybe she was coming back from visiting Kate who lived in New York now.

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“He came to tell us that Avengers Tower was going to be sold.” Y/N smiled sadly. “And that if we needed something, we could always count on him. He’s going to retire to take care of Morgan and Pepper.”

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The blonde nodded. Those names made Y/N shed a tear that quickly dried up.

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“I miss her so much, you know?” Y/N swallowed hard and closed her eyes, trying to stay strong but it was so hard lately. Especially when the memories grew heavier in her heart. “She’s the love of my life, how come I'm still doing all this? Why am I still alive?”

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Y/N couldn't help but wept, feeling Yelena's arms surround her.

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“There are days where I don't know how to go on without Wanda.” The agent sobbed in anguish, she always tried to be positive and strong but she no longer knew how to keep going. Especially with some of the remaining Avengers spread across the world. “I- I just… I make myself some tea and I just start crying, and I cry until the tea gets cold, a-and then I have to make another one.”

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Yelena pursed her lips trying not to cry, but tears welled up in those green eyes. Both tried to be strong for each other.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ "Sometimes… I repeat to myself over and over again: what was the scent... what did her hair smell like? Because I remember it was raspberries but what if I forget? What if... I can't remember anymore?" Y/N smiled sadly. “I feel like I'm missing three pieces of my heart, and the only one that holds everything is you.”

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“I know, Y/N/N. I miss Natasha too.” The russian cooed, hugging her tightly. “It hurts me so much… Sometimes I talk to her, whistle to her... but she doesn't answer. I’ve loved her so much.”

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Now she was the one who broke down crying.

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“I’m sorry.” Y/N looked down to see how Yelena hid her face in that hug, and just kissed her forehead, both consoling each other in a big hug at that moment.

Yelena wasn’t the kind of person who shows her feelings easily. No. Fuck, she used to just growl and roll her eyes at her but all this time... all this pain, she could only show it with Y/N.

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“Do you think they're okay? Wherever they are.” Yelena sniffled.

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“I dunno, blondie.” Y/N sighed. “But I hope so.”

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That beautiful moment lasted for a while until Steve quickly led, with a rather worried and confused face.

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“Y/N, Yelena… You two need to see who's at the compound gate now.”

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And when they heard the whole story that Scott Lang had to tell them, they were even more confused and perhaps… deep down, hopeful.

The noise of breaking glass and shots was all that could be heard, besides desperate screams of the members of that gang.

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“It’s her! She’s after Javier!” One of the gang members yelled in Spanish and fired his machine gun into a dark corner of the street. A few seconds later, that same man was thrown into the air and hit the wall with such force that he died on impact.

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The female figure of a black-haired woman stepped out of the darkness, a proud smile and brown eyes filled with a desire for revenge.

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“Todos van a morir, pero ahora solo quiero a Javier. Entréguenmelo y podrán irse. [You all going to die, but right now I only want Javier. Give it to me, and you can go.]” The brunette ordered willing to let go, for now. ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

None seemed to obey, in fact some of them laughed and looked at each other.

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“Good, your choice.”

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That woman raised her hands and killed several of those criminals, using vines to catch them, she took one and attracted one using him as a shield.

Jules smiled coquettishly then blew some spores into the man's face, like a poisonous kiss. The man's horrified look changed to a more relaxed one, the irises of his eyes turning green. “You want to protect me, and now… You’re going to kill all of your friends, then yourself.”

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Exactly as she said, the man fired at his own people and then shot himself. Jules sighed and walked to the second floor of that building, where another group of thugs fired at her. One by one, she took it upon herself to clear the path.

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“What do you want?! I didn’t do anything to you!” The leader of the gang asked, walking backwards. There was nothing left but to give up.

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“You’ve survived.” Jules said as she slowly walked towards him. “Half of the planet didn’t.”

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Even though it was her, that was no longer the same Julia from before. Those five years changed a lot in her mind and her heart.

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“They got Thanos… you get me.” Jules cocked her head, biting her lower lip playfully.

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Javier knelt down ready to beg for his life, even if his pride said otherwise.  “I'll give you what you want, but please, don't kill me.”

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“What I want? You can't give it to me.” Jules whispered venomously. Step by step, it was a death sentence. The vines and the ivy were moved like snakes, searching for their prey.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Por favor, güerita no me mates… Please, please don't kill me.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She just raised her hand and one of the vines wrapped around Javier's neck, lifting him into the air. He began to move her legs, desperate.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Julia, stop.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Her best friend's voice made Jules turn to look at the door, perhaps with all the noise of shots and screams she hadn't heard the sound of the storm approaching.

Y/N slowly entered that warehouse.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh, hey sis. Long time no see.”  Jules smiled casually, but didn't let the guy get away.  “Did you finally come to join the party?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I came to save you.” Y/N swallowed, noticing how the vines moved around her as if they had a life of their own, even if Jules controlled them. “Let him go.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“No.” her response was blunt, it even made the vine tighten his neck more. “You... tell her... tell her what you've done.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

 “Please, don’t do this. You’re… not a killer.” Javier could barely say.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Oh, look around you, I already am.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Jules, stop.” Y/N begged.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Tell my friend what you did and I'll let you live.” Jules jaw clenched, making the vines tighten around the man's neck. He found it difficult to speak, he barely gasped like a fish out of water.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“What are you saying? I can’t hear you-” She said with an adorable smile but ended up shouting: “SPEAK LOUDER!”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Julia, THAT'S ENOUGH!” Y/N took a step forward but Jules raised her hand, stopping her with the vines. Jules looked at her seriously, forcing Y/N to stay still and then turned to see the man again.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You took that little one, didn't you? A little girl in Morelos. You did these despicable things to her.”  She hissed angrily, her gaze locked with the man's, who was struggling to breathe. “A child, and not just one...”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The man just closed his eyes and after a moment, nodded desperately hoping that she would let him go.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“See, Y/N? This happens when you’re soft like we used to be. When justice forgets what it really means.” Jules felt a huge pain inside her, her hands trembled but she was determined to go for it.   “No matter how much you fight to be better and let go your past, to redeem yourself…”  She thought of Natasha. “…You will die snapped and a rapist son of a bitch will be left alive on this planet.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N nodded, trying to reason with her. “You're right, he deserves to face justice.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Justice?!” Jules laughed wryly.  “There’s no justice! Especially when the jury released him because he didn't penetrate one of his victims with his penis… Oh no! He did it with his fingers and tongue, and that to them meant: letting him go!” The brunette screamed, the vines squeezed him enough for him to start turning purple.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Justice. That's what that girl didn't have.” Jules took a shaky breath, those brown eyes no longer showed that warmth, patience and tenderness as before.  “But I'll give it to her. To all of them.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Without waiting any longer, Jules moved her hand and the vines broke the nasty guy's neck, letting the lifeless body fall to the ground.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“One less, many to go.” Jules sighed looking at that man's body and then turned around willing to leave that place ignoring her friend.  “You shouldn't be here.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Neither should you.” Y/N followed her.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I've got a job to do, you're making it more difficult.” Jules heard the police sirens in the distance, so she decided to go back and take the back exit of that warehouse.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Is that what you're calling this?” Y/N walked after her, leaving through the back door of the warehouse. Jules took it upon herself to remove some of the surveillance cameras with ivy before they could capture her. “Killing all these people isn't gonna bring Natasha back.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N tried to take her arm.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“They are not people! They are infections corroding this Earth.”  Jules turned, breaking free of her grasp.  “The little that remains of this world at least.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You are not the one to decide that.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Neither are you.” Jules snapped.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Natasha wouldn't want this.” Sadness was reflected in Y/N's eyes, who saw her friend as a poor shadow of what she used to be.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“She's not here to decide, is she?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“But she could… if you come with me.” Y/N she released the best bait that she could to catch the biggest fish in the river. Hoping that was enough to get the brunette's attention.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

And she did it. Jules turned to look at her, this time in a very different way. This time, a small light of hope was born in those brown eyes or maybe it was the anger she felt if Y/N played with it.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Don’t do that. Don't play with it.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“We found something.” Y/N sighed as she moved closer to her. “A chance, maybe.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“That’s impossible.” Jules narrowed her eyes, not understanding.  “You just want to trick me to go back.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“No! I swear… There’s a possibility. Just one. But you have to make a decision now, because the police are coming and the quinjet is three fucking blocks away.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Now the concern was reflected in Jules face, there was no way to achieve what she said.  “You can't bring anyone back to life, not even I can go that far. Nature wouldn’t allow it.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“It is not about playing with nature.”  Y/N walked in a hurry escaping from the sirens.  “It's about going back… Do you love her enough to give it a try?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The raven-haired woman looked thoughtful. “Are you sure of that?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Pretty sure it could work.” Y/N looked at who was her friend for so long, for a moment she believed that the sparkle in those eyes had returned.  “But we need you.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Don’t.” Jules said barely, like a sigh.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Don't what?” She stopped, making Y/N turn to look at her. The neon signs reflected their faces, like the most beautiful work of art.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Please, don’t give me hope.” Jules pleaded.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

And for the first time, Y/N's serious look turned into a softer one.  “I'm sorry I couldn't give it to you sooner.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

They spent days trying to plan everything they had to do perfectly. Each of the stones they had to 'borrow' and then return. A time heist. Each of them had a plan, but that wasn't what mattered right now.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Tomorrow, we will be saving the ones we love the most.” Y/N took the beer and toasted against the brunette's, who was only watching through the big window.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Tomorrow.” Jules sighed, her heart skipped a beat at the thought. “Do you think they will understand?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I think so… Yeah, I'm not going to be the one to tell Wanda that her favorite band split up two years ago.” Y/N said making her friend laugh again, missed that nice sound so much. “But fuck, I'm going to tell her that Britney won the damn lawsuit.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N laughed and then brushed a few crumbs off her shirt, making the ring she was wearing as a pendant to bounce.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Still carrying that thing?” Jules smiled tenderly looking at the ring.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N looked at it got lost in memories. The ring with which she proposed to Wanda so long ago. “And I will forever.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She smiled at her friend, who understood perfectly. The raven-haired woman nodded slowly.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“If I had married someone... it would definitely have been Nat. She would say ‘No, thank you!’, of course, but at least I would have tried.” Jules said with a broody smile. Natasha Romanoff left a hole in her heart, taken it away forever.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wanda wanted us to get married when we got back from Wakanda.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Maybe you guys can get it right this time. You know that Wanda loved you deeply, right?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I know… I loved her so much, so much that part of me is no longer mine but hers.” She sighed. “And I'm going to keep this.” Y/N looked at that ring with sadness but also hope.  “Until I see her again, this is it, Jules. This is how we get them.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I hope so. I don't know what I'll do otherwise.” Jules looked down, feeling the full weight of her actions.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

At that moment Yelena walked through the living room door, heading straight for Jules. Of course Yelena hadn't been there those days, she was trying to help Steve to convince Tony to help them.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Yelena, wait-” Y/N got up seeing the anger on the blonde's face and remembering that she hadn't had the courage to tell her that Jules was back.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“No, let her do it.” Jules got up from her seat, clearing her throat uncomfortably. “I know you might hate me but-”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Without further ado, Yelena hit the brunette's face making her face to turn around, Jules noticed blood dripping from her lip. And if that hadn't surprised her too much, after the punch the blonde came to hug her tightly.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I’m glad you’re here.” Yelena murmured staying in that embrace for a while. “We're family. I don't want to lose any more sisters... I missed the three of us.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

And how not to do it? Ever since Y/N and Jules had their separate ways, Yelena always felt in between. With no big sister, feeling like a child with her parents divorced, she didn't know which of them to turn to.

Jules looked up at Y//N and just stroked Yelena's blonde hair slowly. They both looked at each other and nodded. They were all Yelena had left, and none of them had given her a thought.

“Tell me again, why did you bring her?” Tony asked again, narrowing his eyes at the brunette. “She could kill us in a flash.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Jules chuckled.  “Yeah, I'm not that fast, Stark.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Isn't that what we need? We need people willing to give everything.” Y/N she sighed, running a hand over her face. It was the third time she'd answered that all damn day.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Steve…”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Steve, who was there with his arms crossed, just stared at them seriously.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“We all deserve a second chance. We can all regret what we have done, and then do better.” Steve nodded solemnly. If Jules was going to bring something good to that mission and she was going to keep someone from dying, then she was welcome.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Jules arched an amused brow. “Yeah, I'm not sorry for what I did... I’m just here to help, that’s it.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Shut up, Julia. You're not helping.” Y/N growled.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Between twists and turns, everyone managed to resolve their differences before keep going with the plan. Each of them had to follow the 'time heist' plan and bring the gems.

And they all made it, making it back alive for the big test. Of course, Y/N kept saying how great it was to see the first S.H.I.E.L.D. base in 1970. ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Now, Bruce was ready to snap and change everything. Around him were all of the avengers, who watched him as if in his hands kept the most precious treasure in the Universe. And it was. ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Are you sure, Bruce?” Steve asked one more time. “I can do it too.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“No, I was made for this.” Bruce sighed deeply and after taking courage, he settled the gauntlet on his arm.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Slowly, the power of the gauntlet was consuming him, making him scream in pain. They all walked away in surprise, but they couldn't interfere even if they wanted to.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Bruce, remember, everyone Thanos snapped away five years ago...” Y/N explained carefully, watching the gauntlet light up when the big guy put it on. “You're just bringing them back to now, today. Don't change anything from the last five years.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ “Please.” Tony added.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Got it.” Bruce growled.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

One.

Two.

Three.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Snap.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Bruce knelt in pain and the way the power of the gauntlet burned his arm made everyone shocked.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Did it work, Bruce Banner?” Yelena asked curiously.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Everyone looked at each other for a moment, their phones started ringing instantly and that brought a smile to everyone. Y/N took her phone and watched that something that she hadn’t seen for a long time, now was shown on the screen.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

'INCOMING CALL WANDA MAXIMOFF ...'

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N smiled widely and answered the call.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wands?” ㅤㅤㅤㅤ But the call ended.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

And they wish they had time to celebrate or answer; one of Thanos' ships stood behind the Compound. And the first thing he did was bombard the quinjets, taking away their chance to use them.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Everyone managed to stay safe, while the team tried to fight Thanos hand to hand, others tried to take the gauntlet and escape with it so that the titan wouldn’t have it again.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The powerful triad of the Avengers faced him, Thor, Tony and Steve. But he also faced Y/N, Jules, and the Hulk in an epic battle. They didn’t expect that attack, much less in such a treacherous way.

And although they thought that everything would end in the worst way, not just one but several portals opened on that battlefield.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ Each of their friends passed through the portal, returning to their side, ready to once again face that enemy, together.

Y/N sighed and tried not to cry when she saw how Wanda ran towards her and melted into the strongest and most needed hug of their lives. Closed her eyes and let herself be carried away by her scent, giggling happily at the scent of Wanda’s hair.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Oh, raspberries.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

A small tear escaped from her eyes.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Strange told us.” Wanda cupped Y/N's face in her hands. She looked so… same and different. Y/N's face looked different, not much but small details that she noticed. “Five years, right?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Yeah.” Y/N closed her eyes, getting lost in the feeling for a moment.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Five years, wow…h-how are you? Are you okay?” Wanda asked really worried.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Can we talk about that later?” Natasha arched an eyebrow, nodding as Thanos's army regrouped on the horizon.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N breathed deeply watching that terrifying landscape, but despite the fear, Wanda's hand taking hers made her smile. Of course they could against this. They had survived the worst, they could against everything.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

And both armies finally met. Y/N rose into the air and used her powers, making a hurricane to get rid of some enemies. This time there was no doubt using those powers, it was a perfect execution.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You are…” Wanda exclaimed in surprise. They both made an incredible team up now.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Total control, huh!” Y/N smirked and then rose up.  “You should see this!”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Her eyes turned white for a moment, and the sky roared like never before. Several lightning bolts fell towards her and towards her enemies. Without stopping, they both fought to protect Peter Parker who stole the gauntlet, getting it as far away from Thanos as possible. ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I already saw the boy, he's coming your way, Strange!” Natasha said through her earpiece and fired at one of the aliens, killing him.  But someone worse stood a few meters in front of her, showing that big spear.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Not this bitch again.” Natasha complained, seeing how Proxima smiled creepily.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The black widow prepared herself for the attack, she was ready to face her when some huge vines opened up the earth and took Proxima, getting rid of her.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Hey.” Jules smiled at her and stoodnext to her, surprising the redhead. Then raised her hand, making some thorny vines to grab many aliens and completely destroy them.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“You-” Nat opened her mouth but didn't know what to say, just smiled back.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Pretty badass, don't you think?” Jules nodded watching as the earth swallowed them.  “They will be a good fertilizer for the soil.”

ㅤㅤㅤ “That wasn't fair, I was about to finish her off.” Natasha teased, smirking.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ “Sucks to be you... But by the way: You’re my whole world, Romanoff. I want you to know that.” Without further ado, the brunette approached to kiss Natasha's lips, just a peck. “’kay, gotta go. Don’t die this time!”  

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The redhead just smiled and shook her head, running in the opposite direction.

And despite the losses that are always to be expected in a war, they did it well. Except for Carol, who was still recovering after she'd snapped. She was powerful, sure, but that was a very potent amount of energy.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ The corridors of the Avengers Compound were full of people coming and going. The medical room was being occupied by everyone who was badly injured, Dr. Cho was crowded but thanked the civilian medical staff who offered to help them.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N kept her arms crossed, watching and making sure everyone was okay. Her tired eyes showed how she felt, beside being in pain. Several cuts and bruises in her face and body showed it.

She turned on her heels to leave for a moment, nodding to Steve who was chatting with Tony, Maria Hill and Nick Fury about everything that had happened.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Now everyone was back and despite the fact that it was a great joy, the world was once again in chaos.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Agent Y/L/N.” Nick turned around so she could shake hands with her.  “Here they have told me the great job you have done trying to keep us standing.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Thank you, sir. I only did what I have been taught in S.H.I.E.L.D.” Y/N smiled and nodded kindly.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I taught you well then.” Maria Hill said under her breath and they both laughed. Y/N patted the Maria's shoulder and kept walking, looking for that special someone.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She searched the living area, the lounge, and the medical wing but couldn't find Wanda anywhere.

Not until she saw how a brown haired lady escaping from her, walking quickly towards the main entrance hall.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wanda.” Y/N called out to her loud enough to make her stop.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Wanda turned around slowly, she looked like she had been crying, because her eyes were a bit puffy and red. She looked quite nervous, looking towards the door as if she wanted to get out.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Why are you avoiding me?” That sounded sadder than she expected. You could tell the pain in Y/N's voice, and the obvious confusion.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“No, why do you say that?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I’m not stupid.” Y/N chuckled sadly.  “I haven't seen you since we were separated in the Med wing. I've been looking for you for a long time.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Yeah… I needed some air.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N approached her, both watched the outskirts of the compound with longing. “Are you okay?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Five years, right?” Wanda swallowed, unable to look at her. Couldn't or she would break. ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N sighed. “Yeah.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I think… I think I'm not ready for this.” The brunette looked down, playing with her rings.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N cocked her head to see her. “Ready for what?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“To do this, Y/N.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wow, no ‘detka’ this time.” Y/N gave a sad and ironic giggle. She didn't understand what the hell was happening now. “I don't understand.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Y/N, it's been five years.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Yeah, five fucking years go by and the first thing you do is walk away and ignore me.” Y/N she said a bit annoyed and hurt. “Would you please tell me why?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Because I'm not ready to know how you moved on!” Wanda finally snapped. “I'm not ready to…” Wanda cleared her throat, trying to be strong and not cry but it was so hard. “I'm not ready to see how you've moved on from me or met someone else.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N frowned and thought about stopping her, but she had every right to express her feelings. She wanted to know how Wanda felt.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“While for you it was five years, for me it was just... minutes.” The sokovian began pacing back and forth, finally letting go of everything she kept inside. “And I come back and I see you... so different and at the same time the same. Don't get me wrong, you look as beautiful as ever but I feel like... I've missed so much.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

"You have… you have a scar there, on your eyebrow, and I- I don't know how you got it! And and I feel so… I left you." Wanda began to cry, and although Y/N wanted to hug her, she only reached out her hand to take Wanda's and gently pull her.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“How do you think it feels to know that? I've abandoned you for years. God!”  Wanda approached to surround her in a hug, hiding her face in Y/N's chest.  “The things you've experienced and I wasn't there. You were alone.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I wasn’t alone.” It was the first thing Y/N said as she stroked her back.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“That's why... Maybe you've met someone.” Wanda looked up and tried to get away from her. “I'm not ready to know that you don't love me anymore.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I wasn't alone, I had my friends.” Y / N smiled tenderly and gently caressed Wanda's cheek. “Wanda... I haven't stopped thinking about you, I never stopped doing it.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She took her beloved's chin to look into those green eyes. A heart that found its other side again, finally, their souls were entwined once more.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I love you. I have loved you these five years... where I didn’t stop thinking about you, loving you, needing you.” Y/N she whimpered and wiped away the tears that began to fall. “I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat. You don't know how horrible it was to live without you, you don't know how difficult it is. Cause it wasn't 'living'. You have no idea how gray the world is without you.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Tears began to escape from Wanda's eyes and she didn't stop them. They both needed this, they needed to heal.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Please, don't walk away.” Y/N begged, feeling Wanda cradle her face in her hands. “I only know that I survived because I had to, because I couldn't leave them alone... because I don't want to be without you anymore. I just can’t. I can’t do it.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

The sokovian hugged her tightly, allowing them both to release into a healing cry. Feeling the warmth of the other's body, all the pain could finally be left behind.

All those sad dates, all those lonely birthdays, all those cold nights.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I love you, Wanda.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I love you so much, detka. I'm so sorry...” She put her forehead against Y/N's, getting lost in that beautiful feeling. “We won't be apart again. Promise we won't.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Nothing will separate us again, my love.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Jules lowered her gaze and hurried her step in that hallway, trying to get out of that place as soon as possible. Her heart was heavy but she had to do the right thing.

At least this time.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

She was about to walk out of the Compound when a figure crossed in front of her, so fast. There was no doubt that this woman was one of the best spies in the world.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Aw! Not even a hug? I see you're not a fan of goodbyes.” Natasha watched her out of the corner of her eye, crossing her arms.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Jules swallowed, this was what she least wanted.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Everyone is there with their loved ones but you… you’re running away without even saying goodbye to me.” Natasha stood idly by, quite hurt.  Although the first thing she did was make sure Yelena was safe, Natasha had not forgotten Jules. “Running away like a quiet and scared mouse.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I’m not a scared mouse.” Jules narrowed her eyes. Those words made Natasha raise an eyebrow, Jules would never have spoken like that.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I don't even deserve that? I understand that five years have passed for you, you must… you must have formed another more important bond or whatever…. Or maybe you just stopped loving me, but I am not even worthy of a goodbye?” The redhead scoffed.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Nat-” Jules tried.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I would like an explanation, because the last thing I remember is that we were... in love.” She wasn't going to deny that it hurt her deeply. “I understand. I wasn't very direct with that, I admit it... besides that a lot of time has passed and we didn't get to make it official, but that didn't mean I didn’t loved you! I did! I DO!”

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“Nat…” Jules came over, trying to calm me down. She just cradled Nat's face in those soft hands. “It's not that.”

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Jules sighed deeply, she didn't have time to explain.

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“I love you, more than my own life.” The raven-haired girl placed her forehead against hers.  “I would give everything for you, I gave everything for you to be here.”

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“Then tell me what's going on...” Natasha pleaded in a whisper, those beautiful eyes sparkling. This was one of the few times that she could see Nat being herself, opening her heart.

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Jules leaned in and kissed her lips, losing herself in them. Didn’t care more than to relive that feeling, that warmth. Nat was alive, she was next to her. As soon as they parted from the kiss, the inhuman hugged Natasha tightly.

Her biggest fear was losing her again.

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“I just didn't want you to see it…” Jules swallowed. “I didn't want them to do it in front of you.”

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Natasha looked at her with confusion and concern. “Do what? Who?”

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“I did some really fucked up things this time where you weren't, Nat... I- I don't expect you to understand me, I just... maybe one day I can explain. They will tell you many things about me, most of them are true... others not so much. And I’m sorry.”

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At that time, General Ross entered with a group of US marshalls and surrounded them. Of course they left Natasha aside, they only came to handcuff Jules who didn't object. Her gaze stayed on Nat's. Sure they had technology strong enough to weaken her, but Jules wasn't going to run away. Not this time.

In fact, it was obvious that she knew perfectly well that this would happen, because Jules never resisted or tried to escape.

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“Ross, what are you doing?” Natasha asked but one of the Marshalls pushed her back.

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“My job, Ms. Romanoff. Just my job.” Ross nodded and they walked carrying Jules, although the arrival of the others Avengers made them stop.

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“What’s going on here?” Steve frowned. “Ross, we can't go through this now.”

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At that moment Y/N arrived, pushing whoever had to to face Ross.

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“You can't do that, she's an avenger.” Y/N tried to intercede adn take her friend, but was stopped by the Marshalls. “Take your hands off me.”

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“Julia Hale, you're under arrest for mass murder in several countries including the United States of America, eco-terrorism, mass property damage, conspiracy, torture, assault, kidnapping… You have the right… to not much at all after that, to be fair.” He sneered. “Do you have anything to say in your defense?”

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Jules glanced sideways at Ross, who seemed quite pleased.  “They were bad people.”

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“Ross… She saved half of the universe with us.” Tony stepped forward, ready to intercede too. “There's still fresh blood on her face, look at her! She just saved the world with all of us! Let her go… for now.”

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“I know, Stark, but it's not up to me. It will depend on U.S. Goverment.”  General Ross started walking towards the entrance, where the SUV's were ready to go.

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“It’s okay, I knew this would happen. We made a deal.” Jules looked back, seeing Y/N but was pushed forward.

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Y/N frowned.  “A deal?”

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“They let me help you if I agreed to go with them, for good.”

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“Where are you going to take her?” Wanda asked, feeling the same indignation as her beloved. She hated seeing her like that.

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“The Raft, until it's time for her to have a fair trial at the Capitol.” Ross nodded and the Marshalls loaded Jules into the SUV.  “It's not up to me to give her a pardon, it's up to them.”

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“Don't worry, I have a cousin who is a very good lawyer!” The huge Bruce smiled and held up his phone, which made her smile.

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Everyone was quite upset and outraged, Tony was talking to Pepper to find a good 'lawyer' to help them with this, besides calling the necessary contacts he had at the Capitol. Wanda took Y/N's hand, who stood watching her friend being taken away and couldn't do anything.

Even if she wanted to, she couldn't make it worse.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

But the one who seemed most devastated was Natasha, who watched everything without knowing what to say. She had no idea what was happening, the redhead just went to the car’s door to see her one last time.

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“I’m sorry.” Jules moved her lips, watching Natasha, before the truck moved away from the place. Leaving the redhead more confused than ever.

“So…” Wanda murmured entering the room, looking around. Everything felt so new. Y/N invited Wanda to sleep with her in her room.  “It was hell.”

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“Yeah.” Y/N sighed as she slowly removed her suit, the wounds making her hiss. “The first year we were together, Yelena kept us here. We couldn't leave her alone, we had all lost something.”

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The sokovian sat on the bed, watching as Y/N changed. Her gaze fell on the new scars on Y/N’s body, thinking about everything Y/N went through, without her. She couldn't protect her. Maybe if she was there, those wounds wouldn't have happened.

After taking a nice shower, they both lay down on the bed so they could snuggle together.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I started going to some meetings, you know which ones. About loss.” Y/N took some of her big shirts and handed one to her girlfriend, putting one on as well.  “It didn't help me much but it kept me standing, enough to keep me going for a while longer.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Wanda hugged the side of her body, caressing her belly.

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“But not Jules. She said that wasn't helping her, then she started to feel… angry.” Y/N was somewhat thoughtful.  “As she learned more about her powers, Jules began to feel everything even more. She has a great connection with nature and that… that made her take a different path.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Y/N frowned and swallowed.  “I tried to make her stay with us but we couldn't. She didn't want to be here, brought back too many memories... About Nat and that, and we couldn't force her.”

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“We lost contact for a few months until... we started receiving some weird cases. They were all bad people, that person was targeting criminals, murderers, cartel people, hunters.”

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“I’m so sorry, detka. Really.” Wanda whispered.  She felt so helpless and angry. Thanos took everything from her. “I'm so sorry about that. I'm sorry I left you alone.”

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“It’s okay now.” She smiled at Wanda, leaving a small kiss on her forehead. She closed her eyes feeling that perfume once more. Yes, everything was back to normal.  “I’m so happy you’re here, that's all that matters now.”

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“Do you want to sleep?” Wanda asked as she gently caressed her beloved's face, removing some strands of hair.

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“I'm exhausted, I would sleep for weeks, but I don't want to stop looking at you.” Y/N muttered, her voice slightly scratchy. Her body ached too much, feeling a stabbing pain in muscles that she didn't even know existed.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

Wanda smiled tenderly, kissing her chin.  “I promise to be here in the morning.”

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“Pinky promise?” She brought her pinky so they could intertwine.

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“Pinky promise, detka.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

They both laughed and snuggled again when Y/N turned off the lights on the nightstand. They were silent for a moment, sharing only the beat of their hearts, until Wanda spoke:

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ “How did you get this one?” The Sokovian traced her fingers over one of the scars on Y/N's stomach, slowly.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I stumbled across a turtle.” Y/N bit her lip trying not to laugh, but Wanda just laughed and patted her.

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“Come on, you dork. Tell me.”

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“I was bitten by a beaver.”

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“Y/N!” Wanda complained and Y/N burst out laughing.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wanda?” Y/N bit her lower lip.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Mhm?”

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“Taylor Swift released two albums in a single year… and they are very cottage core.” Y/N couldn't help but say it, knowing that it was one of her beloved's favorites.

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“Oh God. How good is to be back!” Wanda chuckled amusedly, leaning in to look at her.  “Which is your favorite?”

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Y/N bit her lower lip, forgetting her tiredness for a moment and took one of her headphones from the nightstand, she kept one and gave one to Wanda.

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“Friday? Please, could you play 'Willow'?”

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‘Of course, Ms. Y/L/N.’

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 “This one is for you.”

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'Willow' started to play, making them both smile as they listened to the song.

Tears fell down Wanda's cheeks upon hearing such beautiful words, tears that Y/N tenderly wiped away.

They spent some time looking into each other's eyes, listening some songs and exchanging smiles until sleep came over them.

✨✨ Yeah, I was thinking about the finale... until @imnotasuperhero wanted a bit more. ✨✨ Don't hate me, hate her, poking the bear is never the answer. I'll bite.🐻 (kidding, i don't bite... yet.) here goes some amazing and lovely people tags   ✨  : @wandsmxmff​,  lonewalker17,  tsmeanobody,  dark-hunter16,  lattayhottay16,  natashaswifeu,  silverockmusic,  kacka84,  emeraldevan! @sunsol-22 @dparker0 @imnotasuperhero @pawiie

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[firestorm09890]

just some rambling about lcb’s canto v part 3 things vs the source book

It felt like they combined the personalities of Starbuck and Stubb, and then they replaced Stubb’s personality entirely with Flask’s (the third mate), who was always the one described as irritable while Stubb was the jovial one.

Book Stubb was also pretty uncool, despite being so casual. Pip had to be the replacement oarsman in both cases, but the reason Pip’s sanity snapped in the book was because he jumped overboard out of fear once, Stubb told him they’d just leave him behind if he did it again, and then when it happened again, Stubb did leave Pip behind, and those few hours out at sea before the Pequod rescued him were what broke him; here, Stubb saved Pip from a fate worse than death, and then what happened to Stubb after is what broke Pip.

Speaking of Pip, weird choice to make them want to be a landlord. That’sss all I’ll say about that

Also, RIP Tashtego. Constantly got the short end of the harpoon in Moby Dick (basically first to slay a whale on the voyage but Stubb got all the credit, fell into a whale and almost died, saw the White Whale at the same time as Ahab and should’ve been awarded the gold doubloon for it but Ahab insisted he was first) and the trend continues here by giving his incredibly homoerotic moment of being saved from drowning in the whale by Queequeg to Ishmael instead, with him just not showing up at all… actually maybe Tashtego won in this case lol

The flashback with Ishmael going into Ahab’s cabin made me think that they would give her the dilemma of “should I kill her right now in her sleep”, similar to what Starbuck had in the book, but nope.

There’s a huge difference in the way Starbuck butted heads with Ahab in the book vs in Limbus. Book Starbuck definitely had a lot less faith that the captain was steering them right- forget “after we kill the Pallid Whale it’ll all be okay” that Limbus Starbuck thought, no, book Starbuck repeatedly told Ahab to please, turn around, please stop trying to go kill the White Whale, your revenge quest is meaningless because it’s basically just a force of nature and you can’t get revenge on nature, we can just go home, we've had bad omen after bad omen, don’t you see you’re leading us to doom- and he did this from the very beginning all the way til the very end, when they literally saw the beast. However, despite his pleas and disagreements, he did still follow the authority of the captain (can’t have a mutiny when it’s just you who disagrees; can’t shoot a man while he’s sleeping when you have too much of a conscience and a fear of going to hell to justify becoming a murderer) and inevitably helped Ahab get what he wanted. That’s something both Starbucks share.

Overall… it’s probably because they had a different story to tell. They had to make Ahab worse™️ than in the book so everyone surrounding her had to be changed to facilitate the fact that she had such a hold over all of them

The thing with Ahab promising gold coins to the crew (with it being clear to the audience that they’d never get them) was the progression of the book’s singular gold doubloon, which was promised to whomever saw the White Whale first. In the book, it was merely a symbol, with a bunch of different characters attempting to analyze its symbolic meaning in-universe (mostly in an astrological sense) and not really wanting it for monetary reasons (Flask even says that it’s just worth $16 and could buy 960 cigars. of course, that was in 1851, and inflation is one hell of a problem…) Here, that promised money is worth a lot more, both monetarily and as something to keep the crew going.

And then! The cult-like aspects. Kromer had her inquisitors with artificial brainwashing and it’s very stereotypically cult-like, but Ahab’s crew was a lot more accurate to how real-modern-day cults work. The recruitment of Ishmael made that clear. Here, she was at a low point in life, with no idea where she should go, and then boom, Ahab steering her. In Moby Dick Ishmael already wanted to go on a boat, as did every other sailor there. None of them even knew who their captain was until after they’d been out at sea for weeks because Ahab is weird like that. He got all his sailors into a disturbingly powerful fervor one night about the White Whale but for the most part they seemed to be mostly in it for the whales they encountered along the way. Book Ahab even recognized that in order to keep his crew from mutinying, they had to pick up some other whales- and unlike the gold coins keeping the crew motivated in Pequod Town in Limbus, this was an actual, tangible thing. More of a compromise to keep the crew happy than a lie.

Limbus Ahab’s boat was completely Ahab, with desires completely Ahab, completely enrapturing her crew. Book Ahab’s boat was The Pequod, a whaling ship that just so happened to have a monomaniac at the helm. Limbus’s Pequod crew had faith in Ahab until they died by her hands; book Pequod crew eventually recognized how completely fucked up Ahab was and how screwed they were, but to quote the book itself, “their fear of Ahab was greater than their fear of Fate.”

that’s about all the braincells I have for this

[flamingo-writes]

imagine this scenario with me flamingo, hobie(SP) and reader(daffodil) frequently going to needy neighborhoods and making small appearances to raise people's spirits, Hobie for his part playing his guitar and reader created beautiful pieces of art as well as different edible plants such as apples, lemons, etc.

How is this request making me fall even harder for Hobie? How are you doing this??? HOW!!

Listen, this made me so soft 🥺

FNSM — Hobie x Reader

A/N: At this point I should make a master list with everything regarding the Daffodil universe(?). A book recommendation, exactly last year around this time I read Pussy Riot by Nadya Tolokonnikova. It’s basically a How To Punk as told from Nadya’s perspective (a very punk woman if you ask me, I absolutely love her). It’s beautiful and encouraging. It’s very optimistic despite punk ideologies revolving around oppression and corruption. This book worked also as an inspiration for this fic.

Warnings: mentions of stealing,

Word count:

Hobie took very seriously his epithet of “Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-Man”, so much he had it painted on his vest. He did everything he could to protect those in need, to raise his voice for those who were shunned, to fight for those who were scared.

If he didn’t stand up not only against bad guys but the “good” guys as well, then who was going to do it? In this late capitalist world, the ecological crisis, resources running short, crumbling economy, it was hard to remain hopeful about the future. Hobie made it his mission to keep people hoping.

And since you developed your abilities, Hobie saw the potential right away. You could grow plants and trees! That meant growing vegetables and fruits! Even some sorts of cereals! And after realising he’d never have to buy tea or coffee ever again thanks to you, he thought it would be good to extend that same opportunity to others.

Stealing wasn’t something new to Hobie, in fact, he had quite the sleight of hand. Effortlessly pick pocketing and stealing stuff right in the middle of a crowd. Making a living as an artist was already hard. Since Spider-Man and Daffodil made their services also for free, food wasn’t something that wasn’t precisely abundant in your life —at least not until you developed your abilities— and the two of you more often than not stole from large supermarkets where realistically, the supermarket had very little to lose. However, you never stole from local farmers, and when you had a good month and managed to make more money than expected, you’d return the money to the working class and not a corporation. When you could afford it, the local market was your go to option. When you couldn’t, stealing from supermarkets was it.

However, stealing fruits and vegetables was now out of the way. Now you started stealing other things, dairy, meat, some spices, even snacks. Most of what you stole, now that your life was easier in this aspect, both Spider-Man and Daffodil started making a lot more frequent appearances in poor neighbourhoods, or any neighbourhood that screamed low income work class. Not only to help them by bringing food to them, but also bringing some sort of happiness or excitement to their lives.

Spider-Man brought his band, and managed to set up a gig with all the bare minimum materials. Daffodil created pieces of art with plants. And even covered the streets with fruit trees or fruit bushes so the people always had an option. As well as bringing in baskets of food, as well as some other basic stuff, not just fruits and vegetables.

God, was it rewarding. Seeing the faces of all those people light up. Banging to the music. Enjoying the fruit. Chilling by the trees. It was all so rewarding and refreshing. It definitely ade everything worthwhile.

One time in particular, it was already known among the people, that these two made appearances in the places they most needed them. People were starting to talk about both Spider-Man and Daffodil and what their relationship was. We’re you two just friends? Partners in crime? Perhaps even a couple? It didn’t really matter at the end of the day, all of these people felt incredibly indebted to them. This one neighbourhood had been enjoying of a couple of hours of Spider-Man playing live, and Daffodil growing fruits and veggies everywhere.

While you were immersed in your own job, finishing growing some bushes, seeing everyone taking berries from them, and making more grow, you heard Hobie’s voice beginning to say his goodbyes to the crowd.

"I know you were all enjoying this, trust me, I did too, but sadly, I’ve got more things to do. We’ll be playing one more before we go!” He said, his voice seen and confident as always. "Before that, I’d like a nice round of applause for my beautiful Daffy here, invaluable help, without her, this would be a lot more work for me. She does most of the job here, really!" You said as you turned around and looked at the stage. "Where are you, Daffy, luv?” He asked as you made a tall tree grow. "There she is! Everyone, round of applause for Daffy!”

He then proceeded to introduce and thank his band members. You kept staring at him, feeling yourself blush underneath your mask. Just like him, your own suit concealed the entirety of your identity, by Hobie’s recommendation. And right now, you thanked the mask otherwise everyone would see you blushing. And before Spider-Man finished playing, you caught up with him on the stage. As the crowd went wild, you walked up to one of the mics, taking Hobie by surprise as he didn’t k on you were already there.

"Let’s hear it from our friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man. Everyone!” You said excitedly.

Hobie pulled you by the waist, closer to him and hugged you. People yelling even louder.

"Thank you for helping me out," He whispered. "Fantastic job," He said bumping his forehead against yours.

After you returned home, exhausted from all the work done that day, you hopped into the shower, while Hobie fell asleep almost like a magic spell as soon as he touched the pillow. The last time you’d checked the time, it was sticking blurry numbers past midnight. And time seemed to blend in together, squeezing tightly, as one moment you swore you were helping Hobie set everything up for the gig, and the next you walked out of the shower with Hobie lost somewhere between his 4th and 5th dream.

As usual, Hobie woke up a lot later than you did. As he groaned and dragged himself out of bed, he walked into the kitchen where you were drinking something from a mug and watching the TV. The news we’re covering the latest sightings of Spider-Man and Daffodil. Talking about everything that had happened, the art show, the concert, the food. These people clearly happier with those two than the government who was supposed to watch after them.

"Morning," Hobie said in a low raspy voice.

"Hey," You turned over at him. "How did you sleep?”

“Good. But not enough, watch’a drinkin’?

"Tea," You replied. "Want some?”

“Nah, I’ll go for coffee this morning…"

"It’s 2 pm, love" you giggled.

"Morning still…" He joked walking up to your chair as you looked up. Hobie leaned down and pressed a sweet peck on your lips. "I’ll make some coffee…" He purred. "What are the news saying?”

“That we stick our noses where we shouldn’t, according to that prick Jameson, but everyone in the neighbourhood is actually delighted…"

"Good," Hobie yawned. "Fuck that dickhead, I’m glad people liked it,"