#at the moment i don't really want to bring monetization into it

[sp4rrowdoll]

Is there a way to donate you for your writings? Good food like this can’t be left unpaid queen

Not at the moment, no.

While I’m not going to say that will never happen, at the moment I’m less interested in money than I am in time, attention and affection. Which is to say: if you want to reward me for my writing, leave a nice reply or tags on a reblog or tagging me in a scribble/sketch inspired by my writing. If you're a lurker (totally understandable!) feel free to drop into my inbox and say something nice! Or just leave an emoji if you don’t have the energy, that’s lovely too.

If you’re in my inbox on anon, please feel free to give yourself a little inbox name/identifier if you’d like—I might not do paid commissions, but I absolutely adore writing people requests, and once I get to know them & what they like well enough, gifts. (Also, if any anon ever doesn’t feel comfortable with me posting an ask they leave, drop DAR at the end (delete after reading), and I won’t post it.)

[bengiyo]

We Are Sucks, and BL Will Be Worse When This Succeeds

We Are the series, the latest empty drivel from New Siwaj, has crossed a line for me that I cannot abide. This show is nothing more than loosely connected setups for BL moments that are easy to gif or clip for maximum virality, designed to fulfill a financial obligation to iQIYI and otherwise keep the B- and C-tier BL pairs occupied with work. This show is saying nothing about the human condition with any verve, and there is no queer subtext or text to pull from any of these characters that the viewer isn’t already bringing to the table. 

I had stopped writing Stray Thoughts for this show because it doesn’t really have much of a plot or story to tell, but I am not going to be able to continue this show past episode 5. This show is the BL equivalent of a cumshot compilation. It is designed exclusively as fap material to coo over known BL pairs smiling at each other. I was chatting with @twig-tea yesterday about how after five episodes we still don’t really have anything resembling an arc for these characters and how it’s just a bunch of BL dudes hanging out. Twig described it as “disingenuous to [even] call it a show” and “...a bunch of compatibility workshops strung together.”

I hate this so much. There is no story being told here. This is like watching actor reels on IG or TikTok. There is nothing here to hold onto other than your baseline fondness for the cast. There was a moment in episode 5 that felt completely unscripted between Aou and Boom that felt like Boom reacting to being teased by Aou and not a moment between their characters. They didn’t even let Aou’s character confess the specificity of his feelings because they don’t matter to this show! It doesn’t matter why he likes Boom’s character! Just that he does! Why does Boom’s character respond so positively to these feelings? Why didn’t he take initiative on his own before? What changed at all? What’s the goddamn story here? There’s nothing! We just make it up and enjoy the smiles.

I usually don’t want to bitch about shows I don’t like extensively on here, and I especially don’t like spamming tags with negative commentary or musing on shows. However, there are 11 more episodes of this empty nothing, and 30 more episodes of New Siwaj trash on the horizon. He has become the GMMTV BL Babysitter, and I am horrified by what this means for the genre. I try to stay patient with New because usually he captures some form of gay melancholy or angst in his shows, but there is none of that here in We Are. All of these characters know each other and are basically just hanging out for about an hour of TV. 

I worry about stuff like this being good enough to monetize. There’s nothing interesting for me in this experience with a queer lens. There is no real story being told, and caring about any details as if they matter leads to questioning the integrity of the characters (are we really doing a slave narrative in a college BL again?). It feels like the end product of giving up on chasing ratings and only chasing virality to monetize the talent for ad spots, concerts, fan meets, and merch. No longer do we even need to make stories about compelling romances between men. We just need to get passably attractive boys on screen together and just ask them to smile. 

What does it mean for the genre if GMMTV goes another step forward with this and no longer brings any robust writing to the BL table. Are we satisfied with BL as glorified slideshows of shippable actors? What happens when GMMTV is able to easily milk this over other robust productions? Is this just the filler fluff to keep people engaged with the network between their solid projects to prove their bonafides? BL has always struggled with depictions of queerness, but are we at the point where we don't even try to tell stories that even feel queer? Is just simply putting boys next to each other enough? I don’t like this at all, and it unsettled me as I watched five episodes of We Are only to feel nothing. 

I am always half-joking about being over New Siwaj, but I really am at this point. 

[penkura]

Scared of Doctors anon again.

I now raise you: Law during his time at Punk Hazard finding y/n while they're still a subject.

Honestly I have too many thoughts about this. It's helping me wait for the dub to come out

Such good ideas though, omg. I'm thinking and more is coming to me for this, it's such a good prompt. There's so many ways it could go!

But for now...

Law had not intended to save you when he came to Punk Hazard. He had a plan, one that would hopefully bring down this Devil Fruit factory and help him get his revenge, it didn't include meeting and getting to know you little by little in the time he was there. You had run into Law by accident when trying to escape, making him curious about what was going on.

You look scared when you first run into him, having turned a corner abruptly and colliding with the young doctor, asking him for help.

"Please, help me get out of here!"

"What?"

There's a fear in your eyes he doesn't like seeing, while you grip his coat tightly and plead with Law to save you, somehow. He knew Caesar was conducting experiments, obviously with the SMILE fruit and everything, but he didn't know the extent, and now he's more curious seeing you.

You look perfectly fine and healthy, there doesn't seem to be a reason why you should be afraid of anything. Most of the people that Law has seen through the lab are willing participants, or they've been bribed by Caesar with something for him to use them. You don't seem to fit either bill, unless there's something hidden that even he can't see.

But his powers should tell him, right? The brief scan he does shows nothing is wrong, though he can see some kind of drugs in your system. He'd have to do his own testing to figure out what they are and what they're for, but you're interrupted by Monet a moment later.

"Oh, I see you've met our oldest patient, doctor."

Law's concerns grow when you immediately remove your hands from him, looking towards the ground with more fear than before. Monet explains you'd been sick with a highly deadly virus three years ago before she and Caesar took you in, away from your home and family, and have been working ever since to find a cure. He watches as you back away bit by bit, turning more into yourself and apologizing, before turning around and running back where you'd come from. When he asks Monet at the illness was, she beats around the bush and doesn't give a straight answer, Law knows something is wrong with this situation but he's not in a position to figure out what it is.

Not until the Straw Hats and the Navy show up anyway. The distractions provided by them allow him the time to find you again, though you still seem fearful of him. He holds his hands up where you can see them, making you tilt your head.

"I won't hurt you. I won't touch you at all. I can use my powers to see about your illness."

"...why bother? I'm gonna die anyway."

How strange, to hear words he'd said so long ago said to his own face, but in such a different situation. After Law explains how his Devil Fruit powers work, you consent to letting him do a proper Scan, and you're confused when he tells you there's no sign of any illnesses in your body. He still sees those drugs in your system, but he doesn't have the time to check what they are yet.

"We're going to destroy this place. You'll have to come with me if you want answers from Caesar."

You really don't know if you should trust him or not, he hasn't given you much of a reason not to apart from being a doctor, like Caesar and Monet had claimed to be. Your voice is shaky when you ask Law if he promises to find out what happened, and when he does, you're almost crying as you nod. Law lets you take his hand, once you've calmed down and agreed to go with him, he starts to lead you to a safer area.

"I won't let anything happen to you, all right? Not until we get you the answers you need."

For some reason, you decide to trust him.

[lokideservesahug]

Engineered Success

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

Pairing: Peter 'Bono' Bonnington x reader

Warnings: The end could be read as suggestive I suppose? But not really just very fluffy

Notes: This is based off of this request. Also after watching the Silverstone GP, I now super need Lewis and Bono to say together forever and ever!!

Summary: The Silverstone GP is a great day for many. Especially Lewis Hamilton and those around him. Such as his race engineer and said race engineer's partner.

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

You smile as you look at the sighs around you. Silverstone. Praised for having such an amazing, almost electric atmosphere. Despite the awful traffic you faced this morning, the atmosphere of the paddock still brings a smile to your face.

You walk through the doors of the Mercedes paddock and as soon as you spot your favourite person you break out into a slight sprint. "Roscoe!!" The dog in question happily jumps up at you as you call his name and you bend down to be on his level and start petting the extremely adorable dog.

A familiar laugh and voice fills your ears midway through Roscoe's attempt to give you a big, slobbery link. "Honestly, sometimes I think you love that dog more than you love me." You grin and glance up. "Don't be silly Bono. You should know that I definitely love this dog more then I love you." Your husband just rolls his eyes and you begin to stand up (not before delivering a final pet to Roscoe back. "Morning." You peck him on the cheek.

"Is that all I'm getting? A 'morning' and not even a small kiss?" You nod. "Well someone left without saying goodbye earlier." Bono just groans and leans in for another kiss, this time on your lips. Yet despite playing stubborn just a monet ago, you happily oblige his affection and easily melt into the kiss. A voice behind you breaks your moment. "Well it doesn't take you two long." You turn around and laugh at Lewis' words. "Don't be jealous. I hardly think you you to be greeted like that." Lewis pulls a toothy grin at you words and shakes his head. "No. You're right, I'm fine thanks. I am worried about how readily Roscoe ran to you again. I thought we sorted his favouritism issue out." You purse your lips and let out a long exhale. "Well I'm afraid he knows how to keep the best company." At the end of your sentence, a fan timidly approaches Lewis and your husband laughs at Lewis' words and takes the opportunity to fling his arm over your shoulder, easily maneuvering you inside as you hear more fans being let into the paddock.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

You'd been to many races before. You'd been to Silverstone before. But goodness if this last leg of the grand prix wasn't putting you on edge. Well obviously everyone in the garage was left rigid with anticipation at the moment. George had to retire a bit earlier which dampened the spirits of the people in the Mercedes garage to say the least. But now? Lewis was leading the last lap of the British GP, with Verstappen a good amount behind him. And as long as he was sensible and didn't end up turning into a wall at Brooklyns or anything like that, he had the win in the bag. More specifically his first win since 2021.

This is monumental.

You glance at your husband, his back curved. He's muttering through his headset words of encouragement to Lewis and as much as you want to keep staring at your husband, you feel like you're obligated to watch Lewis. You glance at the nearest screen to Peter (the one above his head) and wait anxiously.

And as soon as Lewis passes the finish line, the garage erupts. Everyone cheers instantly as soon as Lewis passes the chequered flag (and is that Sir Dr.Brian May waving it!?!?!) You feel people grab you into a gug and watch as people bring each others into handshakes and wet eyed embraces. Yet somehow, through all of the commotion, you still manage to focus on your husband's voice.

You watch with a happy smile as he terribly announces Lewis' win to the driver and at Lewis' choked up response you feel luke you're finally allowed to approach Bono. You walk up behind him and you only manage to gently place a hand on his shoulder before he is swiftly turning around and jumping towards you in a passionate kiss.

Now you love Peter. You've loved him for years. And your love life hasn't ever been uninteresting really. But you don't think you've ever had such an emotion filled, adrenaline ladened moment with yoir husband since probably your wedding day. You finally pull away and rest your foreheads together. "Well done." You manage to speak despite your voice cracking with sheer pride midway through.

Bono just smiles toothily at you and wraps his arms around you in a joyful embrace. He buries his face in your neck and kisses the line if your collarbone. "I couldn't have done this without you. Must be Mercedes' good luck charm eh?" You giggle at his words and go to respond but someone cuts across your moment. You both turn to look at Toto Wolff. Gosh he looks happy. He gives a wordless smile to Bono, clearly encouraging him to take to the podium with Lewis (not that Lewis would want anyone else up there with him of course). Your husband turns to you and you just laugh. "Go." You lightly push him away and he gives you a kiss to your cheek and begins to speedwalk to where Lewis is. As he leaves, you catch a towering toto Wolff and you just shake your head and congratulate the team on the win.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Unsurprisingly, the celebrations felt endless tonight. Everyone wanted to celebrate Hamilton comeback at his homemade and you were no exception!

However do will very much appreciate the peace and tranquility of your hotel room. You fall back onto the bed with a groan. "Oh someone's ready to go to bed." You chuckle "Of course." The soft click of a door lock makes you turn around and look up. Bono's hair has long since dried from the podium celebrations earlier but he being's a scent if expensive champagne with him now wherever he goes throughout the evening. Not that you're complaining because it makes him all the more appealing. "What are you looking at?" You hum in fame thought. "Hmmm just mu very handsome, successfully, amazing husband." Bono smiles. "Oh really?" He ealks towards you and slowly undoes the bindings of your shoes and removes them. "Yeah. Did you hear that his driver just won his first grand prix for the first time in 2 and a half years?" Bono fakes a gasp "Oh really he must be super successful then..." You nod. "Oh yeah super successful. And when he for on that podium. Gosh it was attractive." He sinks into the bed next to you and pulls you into his chest. "Oh yeah?" He mumbles into your hairline. "Well maybe you can act in those desires soon. But for now? The best celebration I can have is sleep. We can always celebrate more in the morning." And that's what you do. You fall asleep in your husbands embrace, easily lulled into slumber with the euphoric feeling of joy still in your systems. And as Bono said, it's better to keep the joy alive by extending the celebrations to when you wake up...

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Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed!

As always, likes, reblogs and especially feedback is always welcome!

Taglist: @nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee

[thehaberdasheress]

In the Studio: February 2024

This month has been a lot of boring background work, like moving my work studio from my dining room (80 sq ft) to my living room (150 sq ft). This means now there are two separate workspaces so I can bring in a helper and work without constantly bumping elbows. (Now I just have to hire a helper)

My mom has been lovely in helping me move things, stop and think about it, and decide to move them into entirely different places. Partly because I get fatigued really easily and could almost always do with a break, we always stop banging and clanging when Emily-cat comes out of the bedroom to pet her and promise we don't want to take away all her places to snooze and hide. We're just shifting them around a bit.

I also had one of those moments where I needed to create something for myself or I was going to scream. Which happens sometimes. So I grabbed a design from a 1919-1920 home decor stencil catalog I have and cut a version in removable vinyl for my wall. Here it is, 99% finished, on my newly installed makeup table (cupboard door from ReStore & intricately painted Ikea shelf brackets no one will ever see)

It's an art-nouveau dandelion, which I've never seen before and think is just really frigging cool.

And yes, I know I could try to monetize these images since they're out of copyright and I had to work to make the grainy base image into a better stencil, but like... I am le tired. I have to market so many things. SVGs on Etsy are up for all of five minutes before someone else traces your listing photo and sells it in a bundle with a bunch of other stolen art. I just want to share something small and lovely. Here you go.

This work is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0

[shiftingwithjaidyn]

🕸️,🍎, &🌊!

answering for my writer/fame dr

|| shifting ask game 🕸️; where will you be when you first wake up in your dr? what clothes will you be in?

very basic, i know, but i'll wake up in my room! i want to wake up somewhere where i am already comfortable in (especially since i mostly do sleep methods.). plus, i really want to wake up to my sweetheart princess of meow meow kitty kingdom mari໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა i'm personally very obsessed in anything vintage and romanticizing my life in general/in every single universe being the drama queen that i amso i'll probably be wearing those pretty vintage slip-on night gowns/dresses

🍎; what are three songs that remind you of your dr and why?

● midnight city - m83 - this song reminds me so so sooo much of l.a. (it was a close tie between lady killers II by g-eazy) and the song itself is sort if adrenaline rush was a song which i'll most likely feel the moment i first shift. ● there she goes - the la's - this song is more on how i see myself in my dr/my vibes in my dr, y'know? i've always been a fan of 2000s rom-coms and i've always wanted to be sort of a main caracter in one, so i'm always so happy and thankful whenever someone says i do have that type of personality/aura and i'd like to have it in this reality as well! ● no 1. party anthem - arctic monkeys - this song can be interpreted in numerous ways and while majority of them are a pretty sad interpretation (and i can do a whole essay on every single one but let's do that some other time), i genuinely adore this song with my whole heart and consider it as a love song about me and my dr s/o. there's a specific verse in its bridge "the look of love, the rush of blood. the "she's with me"s, the gallic shrug. the shutterbugs, the camera plus the black & white and the colour dodge." that brings me to my knees and make me go "hey that's us!". me and my dr s/o sort of have a love at first sight (the look of love, the rush of blood) friends-to-lovers trope, so obviously there's a lot of mutual pining and slow burn there, but i think it's sort of bittersweet to have those moments. not in a "oh, i want to be cheesy and corny and blah" (which you can do obviously but that is not my intention here personally), but in a "we get the chance to understand each other to a deeper level that no one else can, but there's this risk, and it's up to us if we want to take it or not.". especially with the fact that we don't act upon our feelings until much later (thought a lot of our friends already speculate || "the "she's with me"s, the gallic shrug") also connects me to this song more for this song is a representation of longing and yearning for someone who you're unsure if they like you back especially knowing everyone has their eyes on the both of you (because he's a well-known actor and i'm a well-known writer || "the camera plus the black & white and the colour dodge") (there's so much words for the last song omg i'm so sorry y'all my lover girl slipped out of her cage.)

🌊; pretend your dr has one of those filler-beach-day episodes. what’s everyone doing?

omgg this reminded me of a scene in this show i'm a part of in my dr (yellowjackets) where it does have a filler-beach-day episode (well more like scene and they were in a lake but whateverrr) anyway, going back to the question! i'm mostly close with drag queens in my dr since i've worked for rupaul's drag race (the og and all stars) for about 10 years so i can only imagine most of the queens like shea couleé, trixie mattel, katya zamolodchikova, violet chacki, jaida essence hall, plastique tiara, etc. relaxing in the corner enjoying the sun and other queens like nymphia wind, dawn, gottmik, symone, plasma, kandy muse, xunami muse, morphi, naomi smalls, bob the drag queen, monet x change, etc. probably ready to drown each other during a game of beach volleyball. (i'm so sorry if this answer's like super messy and not accurate to the question my head is so empty rn HDJKFHSKFHDSJ)

this was such a fun questionnaire session tysmmm gaiaaa!!!! <3333

[munchkinmarauder]

My review of Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver #4

I would give it 4/5 stars - lots to like but not without its problems - probably could have used another issue to flesh it out. Spoilers below the cut

I enjoyed it a lot more on my second reading than my first! However I would say this is one of the weaker of the 4 Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver issues. Stronger than the first one but #2 and #3 were better.

Firstly the art and the colours are killing it. I am going to miss Tammetta's work going into the next series. Williams also does a great job with his bold colours.

The summary of this issue following the announcement of the scarlet witch book did get this on the wrong foot for me because it is all about Wanda which I felt was disrespectful for a co-lead 60th anniversary series for both characters. While the last book itself is a little more Wanda heavy it has a much better balance than issue 1 did and Pietro walks away from this book with his head held high in my opinion (and if the Q&A at the end is to be believed he will have more regular appearances in the Sclaret Witch solo as the Giver is still after him as well - good he brings the missing piece to Orlando's books - a lot of fun and someone Wanda can genuinely emote off of and who matches her beat for beat)

How Orlando would write Pietro was one of my biggest worries going in but I have been really happy with his portrayal so far and wouldn't mind him writing Pietro more. We see a good exploration of his powers and his emotional maturity after his growth in Quicksilver no surrender is on full display! He shrugs off the reveal from Magneto's letter to give his sister the pep talk she needed to control her full power, takes out the frightful 400, lands a solid blow on the Wizard and his confrontation at the end with Magneto was a good one - hes so done with his fathers BS and shrugs it off, tells his sister how much he loves her and leaves. I like that his relationship with Monet St Croix has not been forgotten - Orlando and Tammetta were really like - we're going to have a parent say one of the worst things they can to a child so we're gonna get this man laid (Pietro and Monet messy sex marathons was not something I thought would become cannon but I'm happy it did - I hope the comics keep this couple around for a while and explore them - I hope Monet appears in Wanda's next solo cause I want to see her interact with Wanda).

Cthon Wanda was very very cool. I am excited to see what is coming up with the Giver plot however I do feel this mini could have benefitted from an extra issue, cause having to set up the next Scarlet Witch solo does bog things down a bit. The twins don't actually interact much this series, for something that was advertised as being about their relationship I think it really needed a lot more of that - they spend nearly two issues separated so I think we needed more of a moment between them to resolve their fight. Unfortunately my fear that Magneto would overshadow everything sort of happened with his small appearance at the end immediately making it all about Magneto.

Speaking of Magneto the revelation in the letter is one I liked the more I thought about it. It's not a big reveal but it is Magnetos abusive tactics on display at his finest- a clear setting up of a narcissist parent creating a golden child and Scapegoat dynamic. I know a lot of people are taking what he says as him being right at face value and crying about Magneto being character assassinated or this being an affront to Pietro and I disagree. Yes it's a bit over the top considering what we saw in RoM and Krakoa but it is not out of character. Magneto has always been a dick to his children, Pietro in particular - I could go on for days but this review is long enough - but let's not be surprised that the man that murdered his son and was willing to let his daughter be murdered for mutant kind is a good father in any sense of the world. I think the story itself and Wanda and Pietro saying so to Magneto's face that he is wrong about the twins is very apparent. Tammetta emphasises the physical resemblance between Pietro and Magneto to make it clear that Magneto is projecting onto his son and to a degree wants to seperate the twins. A tactic he also used when the twins were under his "care" in the brotherhood.

Pietro and Magneto were done well in that scene, however, Wanda's response is what is off and I believe that is what does Wanda disservice as a character. She sent the Wizard to a hell dimension for hurting her brother but only gently tells Magneto he is wrong when he tells his only son that he should have stayed dead and calls him poison to Wanda. Orlando's finally calling out Magneto for what he is but the way he won't let Wanda herself go at Magneto or yell at him feels out of character for Wanda. Also the fact she agreed with Magneto initially pissed me off (though maybe this was her self blaming) Is this building up to something more? Will we get and explanation for it? I hope so but until then I am not happy with how Orlando writes Wanda around Magneto. She did overall take a back seat to the men in this series a bit, Magneto infantalise her and she takes it, vision talks down to her and is the kne figuring everything out for Wanda (I'm glad the vibe seems to be they're friendly ex's with no intention of getting back together and it shohld stay that way- though we got a forced cheek kiss - two series now which forces a Wandavision kiss but not Wanda giving her brother a hug when he's emotionally vulnerable - all for a racist MCU show it's very dissapointing) and a lot of the really good moments are taken up by Pietro until she has her main moment at the end - however twins dynamic is even,their partners, Wanda has a solo coming up so I think this last point can be forgiven.

Overall to wrap up this long review I have enjoyed and had fun with this series overall but it has it's flaws - the Wanda/Magneto dynamic being a big one and sometimes Orlando gets a bit too wordy (maybe a bit rich coming from me) which derails the pace a bit and makes my eyes glaze over - but I'm really happy with this series and hope it's success means we get more co-lead series with the twins or more Pietro in comics in general (and Wanda to keep being as prominent as she is)

[nochuelinha]

Too Sweet - Chapter 6: Fermentation

The next morning at the apartment was a bit awkward. Questions flooded my mind. Did I really ask her to kiss me? And now what? My head is pounding so much, but the way she took me in her arms, it was so Ellie-like, I'm screwed. I slept in the guest room, the bed softer than mine. I'll ask her where she got it. I got up and headed to the bathroom. There were small tubes of toothpaste and disposable toothbrushes. Ellie was very prepared for visitors.

The smell of fresh coffee was practically making me float to her kitchen, where she was comfortable in sweatpants and a tank top from a rock band, her hair slightly damp and slicked back. She looked beautiful.

"Good morning, Els," I greeted myself, sitting on one of the stools and admiring her. Ellie turned around with a smile and came to me

. "Good morning, Sweetie, may I?" She asked, holding my face gently. I nodded, and she kissed me. Much softer and sweeter than yesterday's make-out session, but it was good nonetheless. "I'm making coffee, I know you prefer something sweeter, lucky for me the coffee maker can do various types of things," she laughed, returning to her activities.

Breakfast with Ellie was so natural and familiar, between conversations and smiles, that it seemed like we did it every day. I spent a few more hours with her and then went home. Sara wanted to go out for a walk this afternoon, it's been a while since the last time we went out together. We decided to go to an immersive Monet exhibition, with 360-degree projections and a wonderful soundtrack. I took several photos and sent some to Ellie.

"You two are quite close, aren't you?" Sara suggested with a gentle tone. I looked at her, and she pointed to my phone. "I was a bit apprehensive when I thought you two might not get along, I'm glad it turned out to be the total opposite," we were sitting in a diner now.

"I find it hard not to like Ellie," I smiled at the waitress who came to bring our orders.

" Well, that's true, but it can become a problem when you fall in love with her," Sara said, now serious. I looked at her, trying to understand what she meant. "Ellie is amazing when she's in love, but she has a collection of ex-girlfriends. I know it's hard to resist her, but I hope that if by chance you two end up together, it'll be more enduring. You two mean a lot to me," she took my hand and looked into my eyes with great affection.

"Even if things aren't long-lasting with Ellie, I'll never stop being your friend," I told her with all the sincerity in the world.

She smiled mischievously, "So, are you two having something?"

I blushed. "We kissed last night and spent the morning together. I'm not going to label it; I don't even know if it will continue," I replied honestly.

To my happiness, things really flowed. The meetings that initially were exclusively for wedding preparations turned into precious moments for us, filled with kisses and hugs. Visits to vendors became more than that, full of laughter and varied conversations. Being with Ellie is incredible.

Today we're going to a wine tasting, Ellie invited me a few weeks ago. I got dressed as best as I could, chose a black dress, heels, and did a more elaborate makeup. Ellie, as always, looked impeccable, gave me a peck on the cheek, and we headed to the tasting.

"They usually start serving from the lighter ones to the fuller-bodied ones," Ellie said while holding a glass of white wine, her other hand resting gently on the small of my back.

It was a fascinating journey through the different flavors and aromas that the world of wines has to offer. We started with Sauvignon Blanc and Riesling, and that explosion of freshness and fruitiness was like an irresistible invitation to what was to come.

As we moved on to the reds, each glass revealed a new dimension of sensory pleasure. The Cabernet Sauvignon with its dark fruits and oak notes, the Malbec with its unique combination of fruits and earth, the Syrah with its complex interplay of flavors that awakened my palate, and the Tempranillo, a delightful dance of red and dark fruits, spiced with oak and earthy tones.

Ellie's presence by my side certainly made the experience even more special. Her knowledge and enthusiasm for wine added layers of appreciation with each sip.

After the tasting, Ellie smiled and said, "I think we found some really incredible wines today, don't you think? It was a wonderful experience to share it with you. I loved seeing how you engaged with the different flavors and aromas."

"It was all so amazing, Ellie. Thank you for inviting me," I smiled at her, and she gave me a peck on the cheek. We went for a walk afterwards; the night was quite cool, and there were many stars. The tasting took place at a winery, and the landscape was beautiful with several vineyards.

"I think we're quite similar to the wine production process, you know," Ellie's tone was gentle. "We've spent several weeks together, gradually harvesting our feelings."

"We might be in the fermentation stage, I guess," she chuckled.

Ellie really has a poetic way of seeing things, doesn't she? Her comparison between the wine production process and our journey together is so insightful and touching. It's true, over the weeks we've spent together, we've experienced moments that are like ripe grapes, ready to be harvested and transformed into precious memories and feelings.

And when she mentioned that we're in the fermentation stage, it was as if she recognized the process of growth and transformation we're experiencing. Just like wine, we're developing, allowing our experiences to blend and evolve into something even richer and more complex. It's a beautiful metaphor for our journey together.

As we walked through the vineyards under the gentle glow of the stars, I felt a sense of serenity and connection with Ellie, as if we were truly aligned in our feelings and thoughts. It's a moment to appreciate not only the beauty around us but also the depth and richness of our own journey. And I couldn't be more grateful to share this with Ellie by my side.

As we walked through the vineyards, enveloped in the magical atmosphere of the night, the tension between us was palpable. Every glance, every touch, seemed to carry a pulsating electricity, heightening the anticipation of what was to come.

Suddenly, Ellie stopped and turned to me, her eyes burning with desire meeting mine with an intensity that made my heart race. She didn't say a word, but her gaze spoke volumes, conveying all the longing and passion burning within her.

Without hesitation, I surrendered to the moment, allowing myself to be pulled closer to her. Our bodies drew near, every inch of space between us vanishing in an instant. I could feel Ellie's breath against my skin, warm and uneven, echoing my own excitement.

Then, in a bold and impulsive move, Ellie captured my lips in a fiery and passionate kiss. It was as if a flame had been ignited within me, consuming me with overwhelming intensity. Every touch, every caress, was a promise of uncontrollable desire and complete surrender.

The world around us disappeared, leaving only the two of us immersed in the fiery passion that consumed us. Under the starry canopy of the vineyards, we surrendered to the heat of the moment, lost in the whirlwind of emotions and sensations that could only be found in each other's arms.

"Sweetie, you always have the best taste," Ellie whispered, her words filled with affection and admiration.

[the-bar-sinister]

Bleeding, Broken, Mended (81315 words) by VickytheSnake, thesavagesabretooth Chapters: 14/16

Summary: Law is certain that he was 'rescued' just so Doflamingo could kill him himself, but Doffy has other plans. As far as he's concerned, Law's decade-long quest for revenge was nothing more than a sad misunderstanding. He wants to remind Law how things used to be. He wants to find a way to bring Law back into the fold-- back to him-- forever.

catch up here

-

They spent the next twenty minutes or so verifying Monet's identity as she pranced about in Baby 5's body. 

But Doffy didn't really need any assurances. It was obvious that it was her, and it was surreal. He held her in his arms and smoothed her hair and told her how glad he was that she was there. How proud he was of her and her unshakable loyalty.

He promised her that they'd get a proper body for her, even if they had to do something like steal one. 

Doffy glanced at the doll that Sugar had been making, and at Law— at Corazon. "Would you be able to put her in something like a doll, temporarily, or does it have to be organic? I'm guessing it does."

The young man nodded. "Yeah, I can't exactly gift it with the magical ability to move on its own or anything. If I try, it'll just— I dunno. Hang there. It won't adhere."

Monet sighed, arm looped around Doflamingo as she leaned against him in Baby 5's body.

Baby 5 jumped up in Sugar's body. "What if you get Sugar to …." she paused for a long moment. "she just called me stupid, nevermind." 

Doffy's nostrils flared with frustration and he sighed. "Alright, we'll find another solution. At least we've got the opportunity to find a solution. Better switch them back for now."

"I dunno, Baby 5's got a real nice body." Monet joked, to Baby 5's quiet shriek of 'no!!'

Corazon smiled wryly "If you can get me a spare body somehow, I can probably manage." 

"There are possibilities," he mused thoughtfully, stroking his chin. "Temporary and otherwise."

There were always marines and other worthless people around who might be used in a pinch. but his mind immediately went back to Punk Hazard, and to Caesar and his experiments. Maybe he'd know something.

"Either way, Doffy…Monet." Law gave her a warm smile. "Glad you're still here. We're gonna fix this."

The woman laughed, before she drifted over and grabbed him in a tight hug. 

"You'd better. You owe me, you bastard." Doflamingo watched as she squeezed him, hearing her murmur, "I knew you didn't really wanna lose us." 

It was a lot. It was a whole lot to deal with. But Doffy was glad to have to, and he was sure that Law was too. And Monet. It would be a complicated situation, but as Trebol would say, thank all that's unholy they did have to deal with it at all. As strange as this was, Monet being gone forever would have been worse. Had been worse.

Still, a few minutes later after they'd been switched back and he'd hauled his Corazon out of the room, he rested his hand exhaustedly over his shoulder as they headed down the corridor.

"You really need to get taller," he murmured.

Corazon snorted, looking up at him incredulously. "Yeah look. I haven't had my second growth spurt yet. Get off my ass." 

"Off your ass? I couldn't reach it unless I bent over, Corazon," Doffy snickered and shook his head. "Thanks for your work back there."

"Anytime, It's one of the things I'm here for, ain't it? Can't make it up to you if I don't use my power for the good of the family, right?" He glanced over his shoulder. "...I'm glad she's still here, somehow." 

"Same," Doffy nodded. He tugged his cabin door open ahead of them with a jerk of threads. "Don't get me wrong there's plenty to question how the fuck that happened, but I'm hesitant to look a gift horse in the mouth."

It had, however, opened his mind to other disturbing possibilities.

"It coulda been anything. Their bond, some fucked up twist of fate. I dunno for sure." Corazon huffed as he came to a stop outside the door. "...inviting me in, Doffy?" 

"Dragging you, in fact," he said, tugging him along with him. "Unless you're going to tell me you have somewhere urgent to be."

"I'm still on your ship ain't I?" He leered petulantly. "Where else could be more urgent than the captain's order?"

Doffy flicked his fingers against the strings, but obediently allowed himself to be half-dragged into the room. 

"You'd have to tell me," he drawled, letting himself drop down into his familiar chair. "I'd hope nothing– but I'd be willing to hear you out."

"Well there's nothing, alright." Corazon looked up at him with his dark and serious eyes set over the half-smile he'd worn a lot when he was younger— in the times he wasn't hissing and growling like something feral, at least. "If you wanna spend time with me, you've got me." 

"Did you forget that's part of Corazon's duties?" he teased, leaning on his hand. It seemed like such a long time ago now, those old days when he'd drag Law off to sit with him and read comics, or listen to music, or just to hear about what he'd been doing.

A part of him had known it was selfish to rely on Law for comfort when he'd been so young. But what had he been supposed to do? With Vergo away, and Rosi—-

Anyway, Law had enjoyed it, too. He was sure of that.

Law's smile softened, and he held up his hands with a long suffering sigh. "I haven't forgotten, Doffy, and I ain't complaining either— I could use a little time. Like the old days." 

"Like the old days," Doffy agreed fondly. "It's been a hell of a day already, eh? Just one more thing, and then you can help me relax."

-

Law was having a weird first day as Corazon. Weird, chaotic, but ultimately good. Monet…Monet was somehow still, well not alive, but present which was a miracle beyond anything he'd ever seen before.

It was obviously her. He'd known the instant she started talking. Whatever strange force had tied her and her sister apart was something beyond even the warped view of science he held with his devil fruit and its 'magic'.

She was here, and he looked forward to helping her become herself again, no matter what it took. One more way to make things up to the Donquixote family, in a big way— and to undo his greatest recent regret.

Now, with that behind them, Doflamingo yanked him into his private quarters, his boudoir. He felt his face flushing once more, frustrating in how excited the idea made him get.

It was just like old times, he told himself. He was there to help Doffy relax. To be a companion. A friend.

It wasn't like it was going to turn into some bodice ripper.

"Another thing, huh?"

"Yeah, just one. I hope to hell it'll be quick." Doffy's face grew briefly serious and he tapped his chest. "Reassure me I'm alone in here."

"...." Law's eyes widened. "you wanna know if Rosi is…lingering in there, Doffy?" 

"The thought occurred to me all of a sudden," he said, darkly. "Never had reason to think it might be anything other than my own… memories. Better safe than sorry, right?"

Law could tell that Doffy was trying to keep his tone light, even cavalier, like it was basically little more than a joke. A precaution. But Law could tell from the set of his jaw it was more than that.

Law knew Doffy well enough to understand the man was genuinely terrified. Afraid that the ghost who'd haunted the last 13 years of his life was more literal than metaphorical.

He nodded seriously, and opened his room enough to get a sense of Doflamingo, reaching out into him with a twist of his fingers.

Only a short time ago, he would have killed— literally killed— for the opportunity to strike while Doflamingo was so defenseless. But that was another man's vengeance . He'd been consumed enough. 

Doflamingo must have felt the same way. He sat there completely unguarded, laying his life in Law's hands, perhaps without even considering how vulnerable he'd made himself.

Law reached into him, feeling the warm presence of Doflamingo's soul inside his chest. "....I don't see anything other than your own spirit, Doffy." 

Doflamingo wasn't heartless after all. He had one— and only one— right in his chest.

Law watched him exhale and close his eyes. "That's that, then. Yeah. Knew he wouldn't have stuck around."

"Yeah, he wasn't exactly the type, was he?" Law laughed weakly as he dropped his 'room'. "It's just you, Doffy. You and your own heart." 

His smile came back, weak at the edges and he touched his chest. "Give it to me straight, doc, how black and withered are we talking?"

Law snorted with a wry smile. "Like a raisin. But a shockingly big raisin, so you got that going for you Doffy." 

"So more like a prune, got it." Doffy giggled and leaned back in his chair. "Thanks for helping me clear the air on that. Would have nagged me a bit."

Again, dismissive, flippant. But Law could tell the idea might have gnawed at him.

It had gnawed at Law too. The moment the idea came up, he felt a sting of fear of his own. What if Rosi was still present? What if he was still around?

What if he judged Law for his sympathy for the man Rosi always called 'the devil himself'. Ghosts— spirits. He'd be a fool if he told himself they weren't real. Not with the way they were so evident and provable in the world around him.

Monet was proof enough. Spirits existed, and they could linger.

Rosi— he'd trusted and believed in him for years, despite the way he'd been treated. Despite the trauma of the doctors.

But Doffy was there for him, too. Then, now…

He grabbed the edge of Doflamingo's coat with a half smile. "Happy to help. It'd nag me too."

Thank all that was unholy that Rosi really wasn't here. 

He found himself suddenly scooped by Doffy's arm as he grabbed his coat, and the larger man pulled him up against his lap, smiling wider in return.

"It's just you and me, now."

Law's face flushed bright red as he fell against Doflamingo's lap. He really was much smaller than him— much smaller than most people in the gang, much to Baby 5's amusement earlier in the day.

And of course it meant Doflamingo could manhandle him while he was already off balance.

Doffy chuckled as he fell against him, grinning, or maybe even leering down at him. "Like we were saying before that diversion. Just like old times."

Law looked up at him, well aware of how flushed and warm he felt against Doffy's body. "...just like old times. Only I'm not a shrimp anymore." 

He made a show— an obvious show— of looking Law over, his grin slicing his face again under his red lenses. 

"Not a shrimp any more, he says. I mean I guess you sit a little bit heavier in my lap than last time we did this. A little."

Law narrowed his eyes up at him. 

"...a little he says. As if I ain't taller than…" Well. A handful of marines. Some of the girls in the crew. Luffy. "People." 

"People," Doffy repeated, his grin more shit-eating than ever. He laughed, his hand still resting on Law's hip where he'd scooped him into position. "I'll give you— you're taller than Derringer."

Law snorted. 

"Yeah, he's the real shrimp here, Doffy. He's even from the ocean." He shifted, his hip rubbing against Doflamingo's hand as he leaned back into his chest. "....this is uh."

Intimate. It was intimate and it was killing him. 

"Yeah?" Doffy grinned down at him. Was he daring him to say something? Or was he just… being Doflamingo? Who was always very physical and thought personal space was something that happened to him, not to other people. "It's what, Corazon?"

Did Doffy still think of him as a kid?

Law realized he had no idea as he shifted against his lap again. "...a bit different than back then, that's all." 

"I guess that's true." Doffy's gaze felt intense on him, despite Law's inability to see his eyes, and despite the inscrutability of his enduring smile. "Should I put you in your own chair?"

Something about the smile and the phrasing reminded him of Dressrosa— Doflamingo had 'put him in a chair' then. He'd chained him to the heart throne.

Law felt his face flushing deeper, and he sputtered for a moment before catching himself. "You fuckin' wo…no! No I'm real comfortable right here, Doffy!"

Doffy laughed and leaned in toward him, bringing their faces together. "Well,that was an enthusiastic answer."

He was close, too close– and his heart was pounding in his chest. Doflamingo. Doffy. His boss, the man who saved him, the man he tried to kill. He was one of the largest figures looming in Law's life…

Why did he have to be so handsome? So fucking magnetic?

"Was it?"

 "Sounded like it to me, Corazon," Doffy purred. He pulled him suddenly even closer and Law found himself half engulfed in the ridiculous feathered coat that was always around the man's shoulders. "Tell me for real— did you ever miss me? Even when you were trying to kill me?"

One of the feathers tickled his cheek as he reached out to place his hand on Doflamingo's chest— at first to push away, but he found his hand lingering as he looked up at him.

He had missed him. There was always a traitorous part of him that missed him.

 "That's why I knew I had to finish it quick, Doffy…yeah. There was a part of me that always missed you." 

"Knew it," he chuckled. Doffy's hand shifted on his body, large and warm, moving up over his side as he looked down at him. His chest was warm under Law's fingers. "You know it was a hell of a shock to see you in the papers two years ago. Not just to know you were alive. I was still picturing you as a kid."

Law's fingers curled against his chest as he laughed. "That must have been a shock alright. You haven't changed a day, except maybe getting more 'i've decided to dress more like every day's a vacation day'."

He'd pictured him as a kid, huh? Did that mean that view on him had changed now?

Doffy chuckled again. "Well I mean every day was pretty much a vacation in Dressrosa, Law. You missed the nice weather. But also— my hair's shorter. You, though, you changed a hell of a lot more."

Law half knelt, raising himself up to run his hand through Doflamingo's hair with some effort. 

"...so it is." he smirked, looking into his eyes. "damn right i have…in a lot of ways. What'd you think when you saw me, huh?" 

Doffy's smile hitched into a smirk as he leaned ever closer to him. "First thought? Kid grew up into a pretty handsome bastard. Second thought? Damn, that's a lot of tattoos."

"...yeah well, maybe I found out I liked tattoos, huh?" 

Handsome bastard…

It was basically the same thought Law had had about Doffy for years, even as he pushed it down and out of mind.

He huffed. "Careful calling a guy 'a handsome bastard' while he's sitting on your lap, Doffy." 

"Careful, hmmm? Warning me to be careful implies there might be a result I won't like, Corazon." Doffy's tongue showed slightly between his teeth as he gave him a teasing look. He paused and his grin hitched wider. "So what are you trying to warn me about?"

Law felt his face flushing deeper. 

"You might make him think that you absolutely don't just see him as some fucking shrimp kid anymore." 

Doffy laughed and his hand rode higher, almost up to Law's chest. "Oh is that what you're thinking about? Doffy lets kids run around with guns and swords and booze and cigarettes. Even though he made me Corazon he probably still thinks I'm a kid. Is that what you're thinking?"

The feeling of his fingers trailing up his body was like a thousand little sparks of anticipation crawling through his skin. He grit his teeth, looking down instead of into his staring eyes. "...the thought mighta crossed my mind, yeah." 

"Well then," he purred. Law could feel his breath on his face, and the sweet smell of his oiled coat surrounded him. Doffy reached up and put his fingers on his jaw, the sharp moons of his nails sending another prickling sensation. "How about I clear that up?"

A heartbeat passed, as Doffy seemingly waited for his answer, or his rejection.

Law's head was spinning. From a decade of resentment and deliberate, desperate hate, to finding himself back in Doffy's company, to becoming part of the family again, to becoming Corazon— all the way here.

Here on Doflamingo's lap being asked to take the forbidden step forward and more under the man's power.

He swallowed thickly, nodding his head once. 

Doflamingo didn't wait for anything more than that, and he didn't say a word. He jerked Law close and he kissed him— rough and hard and immediate, sucking at his lips and pressing his tongue to invade his mouth.

It was overwhelming. He was surrounded by him. His kiss, his body, his scent.

Law pressed into him, enveloped in the garish pink feathers of his coat, smelling the oil and the smell of booze thick in his nose as he leaned up into the man's kiss. His tongue met Doffy's, brushing against it as a thrill rolled through his body.

Even more than accepting Corazon, Law knew this was a moment of surrender. 

This was everything he had fought and steeled himself against for thirteen years, dissolving in an instant as he let Doflamingo kiss him and hold him in his lap. Thank all that was unholy that they were alone, because if the ghost of Rosi had been there, there would have been a great wailing and gnashing of teeth.

But they were alone, and he was in Doffy's arms.

His tongue lingered on Law's lips for a moment, and then he licked his own, as if he were satisfied with a meal.

"Does that clear up my feelings on the matter?" he purred, his sharp face still hanging near Law's like an overbearing moon in orbit.

Law looked up at him, catching his breath with a shit-eating grin plastered on his face. "Maybe. Might need more convincing, actually." 

Doffy laughed, tilting his head back as he did. "More convincing! Dia's right, you are a greedy little bastard! But I'm happy to convince you, if that's what you want."

He slid his thumb over the sharp curve of Law's jaw as he smiled— no, leered— down at him.

Law arched his hand against his thumb, his breath feeling hot as he met his eyes again. "Greedy, huh?" he scoffed before he shifted to press his hand firmly against Doffy's chest, at the opening of his shirt. "Whatever. Convince me, Doffy. I'm your Corazon, ain't I?" 

-

"I'm your Corazon, ain't I?" 

The words sent a shiver of absolute delight down Doflamingo's spine, the taste of Law's lips lingering in his mouth.

His Corazon. His. Law wanted to be his. Law was his. Law had always been his, he had just been stolen from him, cruelly, more than thirteen years ago. Now he finally had him back, without so much as a ghost hovering over their reunion.

And now Law was begging him to kiss him. To hold him. To make him truly his. The little grouchy bastard might say he 'needed more convincing' but what Doffy heard was 'please kiss me, Doffy. Kiss me until I can't think of anything else. Kiss me until I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is where I belong'.

And Doffy shuddered with delight to hear it. With delight that Law wanted him. Beautiful, handsome, mean, wicked grown-up little Law wanted to be kissed and held and loved like the man that he had become. 

Doflamingo's man.

And Doffy was ecstatic to give him exactly what he wanted. 

It was exactly what Doffy had always wanted. 

The first time Doffy had seen Law, shaking with rage and full of hateful determination, he had seen the man that he might become. A man with a heart just like his own heart. And he had been determined not to let anything stop him from seeing Law become that man. Not even a terminal disease would stand in his way; nothing would stop him from seeing Law, a child who was so like himself, flourish and grow the way that Doflamingo had. He wanted to see the man that Law became, and for him to become his man. His Corazon.

And here he was. Beautiful, and strong, and angry, and mean, and wanting Doffy to kiss him.

Maybe everything that had come between them for so long had been worth that.

"You're my Corazon," Doffy promised, rubbing the curve of his thumbnail over Law's sharp, handsome jaw. "You're not a kid any more, you're my Corazon, and I will prove it to you as much as you demand, you handsome little bastard."

He pulled Law suddenly and sharply close to him with his threads and thrust his tongue back between his lips, savoring the way it filled Law's mouth and heaved against Law's tongue.

Law was Doflamingo's Corazon.There was no question of that any more. He had left a child and come back as a man, and now he was right where he belonged.

And Doffy was never going to let him leave again.

-

Doffy made good on his promise, kissing Law over and over again, his threads tugging him closer, trapping him against his broad, warm chest like a fly traps a spider.

The threads held him tight, as strong as they ever were— as strong as they were back in Dressrosa but not at all as sharp. Law's head was spinning as he caught his breath between kisses, his face burning red as he pressed against Doflamingo.

He'd proven it, alright. He'd convinced Law, utterly and completely. He didn't just see him as some reckless, insane kid anymore. The thrill and glow of excitement that simple fact brought him was almost embarrassing.

Almost. 

Eventually, after what seemed like an age of the world, Doflamingo let him catch his breath, still dizzy and warm on his lap. With a manicured nail Doffy traced the shape of a heart over Law's chest.

"I'll go on and keep convincing you," he purred teasingly. "But give me an update, Corazon. oOw are you enjoying the position?"

Law took several deep breaths, feeling the nail lightly pressing against his chest as he craned his neck to look up at him with a thin smile. "I'm sure you will, Doffy. But…I think I'm likin' it a lot. I slipped right into it, you know? That was exactly what I was afraid of back then." 

Doffy's smile grew teeth, and he chuckled, rubbing his thumb up and down Law's chest. "I'll just bet it was. I wish I had guessed— I would have had a more convincing argument for you back when I had you chained to the heart throne." He dragged his tongue suggestively over the points of his teeth.

Law's heart skipped a beat, and his eyes went wide despite his attempt to compose himself. The thought flashed unbidden through his mind of himself chained to the throne of Corazon, as Doflamingo convinced him with his hands on his….

He shut the thought down as his flush deepened and a hot tension grew below. "Y-yeah I bet you woulda, Doffy." 

Doffy giggled and grabbed a lock of Law's hair, tugging at it under his cap. "Like in a bad novel, like you said at dinner the other night."

Law glanced off to the side. Just like one of those bad novels. 'Seduced by the Pirate Prince' or some bullshit like that. A bodice-ripping tale of corruption and seduction.

He squirmed on Doflamingo's lap. "...you remembered that, did you?" 

Doffy shifted under him in return, and Law got the feeling that the whole scene was a bit exciting for him. He chuckled richly. "It stood out, Law."

Law's hips rested firmly against him, feeling that excitement all too well as he shrugged his shoulders. 

"Can you blame me? You invited me to dinner…in a seastone cuff…after saving me from the ocean despite us being recent enemies. That's a saucy novel plot, not real life." 

"Well, we had a little more lead up than that," he chuckled. "But I seem to have a knack for—"

They were interrupted suddenly by a sharp knock on the door, and Law felt Doffy tense under him, his displeasure written on his face.

Law tensed against him, his fingers digging into his coat as he whipped around with a sharp grimace. Of course. Of course someone came now to interrupt. Right when Doflamingo was getting excited.

Despite Doflamingo's obvious annoyance, Law didn't have the chance to move anywhere before he yanked the door open with his threads.

"Come in," he grumbled.

Vergo was at the door, and Law caught sight of Bepo behind him.

"....." Vergo pushed up his sunglasses. "Hey boss." He spoke as if it were the most normal thing in the world to see Law cuddled up on Doflamingo's lap. Like he'd forgotten that it'd be weird. Knowing him…he probably did.

"Got a minute?" 

Bepo on the other hand, had put his paw against his muzzle, turning to look away a little.

"A minute at least," Doffy sighed heavily. "If it's something important I've got significantly more than that."

Law turned a deeper red, trying to wriggle off Doflamingo's lap before he imploded in a sea of self-consciousness. It didn't work, so he kept his eyes averted towards the ceiling instead of at Bepo's embarrassment.

Vergo chuckled. "I mean…it's pretty important. We've got an island in the way. One of the weird ones that the pose didn't pick up from the looks of it. It's directly in our path. Had Vi take a look and she tells me it's completely surrounded by navy ships. We're around 12 hours or so away from it, weather permitting. Wanna know if you wanna take a detour. You know. For those marine heads." 

Doffy's expression turned from sour to intrigued, and he ran his finger down Law's chest, despite his poor attempt to wriggle away. 

"Well now. Marines, eh? I know everyone's been itching to bust a few heads. Let's head for it. Have Vi get together a full write up of the situation and if it turns out it's gonna be a pain in the ass we'll avoid it instead."

"A bunch of navy bastards on an island huh?" Law murmured as the prickling sensation of his touch rolled through him. "Should make for some fun exercise."

Vergo saluted Doflamingo with a thin smile. "You got it, Doffy. I'll ask Vi to get on it. Should have the full write up when you're done having fun with Corazon."

Law sputtered indignantly, staring at him with wide eyes "We ain't…Shut up!" 

That got a laugh out of Doflamingo, who grinned wickedly. "Sounds perfect. Thank you both." Law watched as Doffy's gaze snapped to Bepo. "Don't worry, Beps, you'll get him back mostly intact."

Bepo made a choked noise and shielded his gaze again, nodding.

Law buried his face against Doflamingo's coat. "I'm never gonna live this down."

Vergo chuckled before patting Bepo on the shoulder. "Don't worry buddy, you'll get used to the way things are around here soon enough. Come on. Let's go report to Vi." 

"R-Right. Uh, later, Captain. Corazon." 

Law heard Doflamingo chuckle again, still buried against his chest as the door clicked closed. "Whoops."

"Whatta ya mean, 'whoops!'?" Law growled against his chest. "You coulda let me up to save face!" 

Doffy tugged him closer, his threads still wrapped around him. "Oh, like you wouldn't have been just as embarrassed and twice as awkward to be leaping up from my lap. Really, I just saved us both a couple of dumb conversations."

Law looked up at him, huffing sharply. In a way he wasn't wrong. It made things simpler. Now Vergo and Bepo had seen the two of them practically fucking with their clothes on. Made it pretty damn clear where things stood without the need for a long and drawn out awkward conversation.

He brushed his fingers through his coat with a narrowing of his eyes. "It's because you're embarrassing, Doffy." 

Doffy laughed, and put two fingers under Law's chin, tilting it upward. "You know you're one of the few people who'd actually dare to say that to me."

Law's neck craned, his lips lightly parted as he looked up at Doflamingo as he took him in. Striking, charismatic… handsome. Doflamingo was a man who drew people into his 'pace', just as he'd warned Luffy.

It never took long, it never took much for people to start dancing along to the beat of his drum, dangling from the strings of his fingers. It wasn't a surprise that most of the crew wouldn't dare to call him embarrassing. They all loved him to the point of near worship.

Maybe Law did too, in a way that came off vastly different.

He smirked at him. "You like it, I know you do." 

"I love it," Doflamingo snickered. "You sassy little bastard. Maybe I am a little embarrassing— but I think you like that."

Law flushed deeply "oh yeah? You gotta prove it. I ain't admitting shit, Doffy." 

"You want me to prove it?" Doffy's smile almost became a sneer, and he suddenly put his hand right on the crotch of Law's pants. "You don't seem any less excited than before the door opened."

Law felt Doflamingo's fingers grab him, stiff, through the layers of fabric, his body squirming under the touch as he wound his fingers into his coat's feathers. "...you've got a point there."

Yeah, it was true. He wasn't any less excited. He was uncomfortably excited through the whole interaction and all the way till now. Doffy had an effect on him. An intense one that washed over him like the sea's waves. 

"I do," Doffy purred, leaning down toward him again. "So I think I'm right when I say you don't mind me being a little embarrassing."

His hand lingered where he left it, without any indication he'd be moving it any time soon.

Law shifted his hand, brushing it down Doflamingo's chest with a snort of breath. "If there's anything the last two years have taught me, it's that I've got a horribly embarrassing taste in men." 

"Oh well color me fascinated on that little tidbit," Doffy purred. His other hand rested on Law's chest now, and he was face to face with him again, the sharp tip of his nose brushing Law's. "You can tell me all about it. But later. Maybe after Vi's report."

Should have the full write up when you're done having fun with Corazon. That was what Vergo had said.

Law could feel his breath on his face, the brush of his skin against the tip of his nose as his body pressed tight to the other man's— bound and commanded by Doflamingo Donquixote. 'Having fun with Corazon'. He could see exactly where this was going to lead, their first consummation of their reforged connection.

"Gonna fuck me then? Is that it? Fuck me, go to a meeting, hear about my love life?" he huffed softly. 

Doffy's sharp tongue poked out and licked Law's lower lip. 

"I could," he said, the weight of his hand heavy on his chest and between his legs. "Or maybe I should make you wait. Have a drink while you go get an update from officer Bepo. Get busy with some paperwork. Drag you back to my room in oh say… a day or three."

Law could see himself reflected double in Doffy's blood colored lenses.

He flushed deeply, looking at his own scowling face reflected back at him as he pressed firmly against Doflamingo with a sharp huff of breath, his fingers snatching down between his own legs to brush Doffy's crotch with his fingers.

"You'd wanna make us wait that long?" 

Doffy was just as hard as Law was— just as excited. It was impossible not to feel it. It was impossible not to think about it.

But he just smirked at him, and his fingers stroked up over Law's jaw and neck. 

"I'm a surprisingly patient man, Corazon. I've waited this long. I could keep waiting."

Law brushed his fingers against his crotch with a frown, feeling his body heating up as he pressed closer to him. "....what if I don't wanna wait, huh?"

Everyone always called him reckless, impulsive, dangerously so— maybe they were right. Maybe it really was, the way his body clamored for him to jump right into an amorous tangle with Doflamingo. It was a way to reaffirm his decision, to get a taste of what his quest for vengeance took from him…

It was hot. 

Doffy laughed at him again, cupping his face. "Tell me you don't want to wait, Corazon. Tell me what you want from me."

He froze, nuzzling his cheek against Doflamingo's hand with a soft hiss of breath. 

"...I…I want…" he leaned closer, huffing sharply. "I want you to fuck me, Doffy. Okay?"

He spat it out, too flustered to do so delicately. 

Doffy's chuckle sent a thrill down Law's spine as his thumb tickled his jaw. "Oh, with pleasure, Corazon. With pleasure."

Doflamingo's strings drew him tightly to his chest, making it feel, once again, like he was under his power as he pressed a rough, deep kiss on him.

Law grabbed his coat with his hands, using it as well as the strings to press himself close as their lips collided. It was a rough, passionate kiss full of desire and expectation.

He'd accepted Doffy's help. He'd joined the crew again as Corazon. He'd already fallen back into their clutches— so why not fling himself directly into the flames of passion? If he was going to be a Donquixote again, then by all that was unholy, he was going to go all the way. 

[a-s-levynn]

hello beloved mutual!

i wanted to scurry my way over here and ask a question, for i was thinking about it. have you ever thought of making art prints, the most recent little offering pieces have really made me think “i want that framed on my wall”.

I mean if you really want any of them on your wall, i can send you the original large file and you can go to a local print shop to print it for yourself? All you have to do is ask or dm me.

Look i've just.. drawing is a hobby for me, an escape from everything so to speak. And i'm afraid to monetize it. I don't want it to lose it's primary quality of purely doing it for enjoyment. I don't want it to become a job, and if i'd sell it, i feel like i slowly but surely would see it as such.

Thank you far asking, it is quite flattering and frankly extremely humbling. But making prints is not in the plans.

longer explanation under the cut

My drawings look best in their original size and that is probably too small for a print anyway and i probably would only do it in the original size. I don't know how people feel about small scale prints.. And if i want it to become print quality i probably should clean it up from the reamining sketch lines and such, ye? but i would feel bad about that. I like them there, they are part of it. Also the cost of the print with all the appropriate shipping options and proper packaging.. I really don't see it justified.

Mostly because i would want to do it myself because personalizing and stuff but than that would bring in a whole other set of baggage with the stress of not being able to send it out in time or the potential to mess up an address. Purely the printing-packaging-shipping cost would be about 25-30euros/package (depending on destination) without me loosing any money on it.

So yes, technically if someone really wants a print sent from me directly we can arrange it if you cover the shipping but i don't know guys.. i don't think any of these would worth that much and i really don't feel confident about it.

sidenote: for a breif moment i was thinking about a ko-fi at some point as a tip jar or something, just to cover maybe a pencil or two here and there, but i never got around setting it up because as you've seen i use mostly the cheapest materials and i'm usually not seeing my art worth actual money so i can't in good conscience justify even that.

Again, thank you so much far asking, it is quite flattering and truly humbling. I just.. you know.

But i can send the file to you any time if you want to print it for yourself, it also would be much much cheaper on your end than directly coming from me anyway.

[allamericansbitch]

Everything I've learned about Matty Healy has been deeply gross to me. I've liked Taylor Swift on and off throughout the years. And always liked her art. I don't call myself a Swifty because I don't agree with or defend all of her behavior. But I do follow her and know a lot about her and the fandom. So I feel like when I'm being critical of her, it's from an informed place, yk? But I see all these creators on Tik Tok, who aren't even fans, responding to this just for the content, and either saying things about her that aren't true, or responding with plain misogyny. So while I am just as troubled by her association with him and disappointed in her lack of vocal support for abortion rights and trans rights, I'm also concerned about people not being critical about the WAYS they are choosing to criticize her. Yes, she is very privileged. She and her family before her have benefited from capitalism and she makes being "a good business woman" part of her identity. She's benefited from this system. She surrounds herself with POC and queer performers on tour but then makes then share a stage with a bigot. She speaks out for social justice the loudest when she's effected by it, when the size of the platform she's worked to achieve and the values she's monetized in Miss Americana give her a responsibility to do more than that. (Tho I have my own opinions about celebrities not being the best demographic to be activists). All of this and more is worth approaching with critical thinking. But when people who only know surface level stuff about this and about her throw out misogynistic dog whistles like "she's Never been discriminated against" (she's been SA'd in her work place. That's definitely discrimination). Or she's "playing the victim" (a woman can make mistakes without being a calculated manipulator). Ultimately, while the situation is very different to 2016, I just don't want to see the same misogynistic dog pile we did back then. Where everybody that was already against her because they aren't comfortable with women being sucessful or talented jumps on top of valid criticism and dilutes it with bad faith vitriol. Ultimately I do want to see her showing the overt support at her concerts for the LGBTQIA community with her words as well as continued actions. Artists like Lizzo, Harry Styles, Panic! (back when they were touring), and so many others are speaking at their shows specifically about anti trans and anti abortion legislation and waving our flags. When people say it's a safety thing, I don't believe them because these other artists are doing it. Even if that's the intention, the effect is that space is being held at her shows for homophobes to buy a ticket and feel comfortable there. Again, I don't think celebrities make good activists. But I also think inadvertently catering to homophobia and racism goes against her stated values and I'd like her to address that. And for god's sake stop bringing Matty Healy on stage.

Asking anon jic somome wants to send me a death threat for not having the "right" thoughts about this.

yes! this is very well said and i agree. sadly there's always gonna be people who are just flat out sexist and will see the valid criticism she's getting and decide to join in their not-so valid narrative riddled with sexism and misogyny. the water always gets a little murky with these things.

this situation is 1000% different from the 2016 situation because that was powered by misogyny and the act of using her as a scapegoat for people's anger during the election, it wasn't really about her as a person but more of what she represented to people- which was a rich white person taking advantage of their privilege and not speaking on anything or using their platform for good. And I think the label they gave her as ‘always playing the victim’ was very aggressive for the time because while she had her moments, generally she wasn’t doing that and like you mentioned was a victim of many things.

However now I feel like we are very much inching too close to that and it’s making me nervous due to the amount of people who took that stance back then in 2016 and being like ‘I told you so! She’s playing the victim again’ because tbh I can totally see it being spun that way.

And to the great point you made about how bad people can feel safe at her shows, I’ve seen a few people point that out as well. I saw a video of someone who went to a show, saw people singing yntcd and then saying homophobic things in the parking lot after the show. I also understand the idea of her not speaking out as a safety thing… but her not speaking out makes others also not feel safe at her shows. Their safety is also important and, by Taylor not speaking out, she’s providing a space for them to feel threatened.

[mauricetheblurst]

First, and most importantly, I am here to just yell about how much I adore your sexy knights. They bring me immense joy every time one crosses my dash.

I am tired, old and depressed so I don't always have the ability to yell about it in the tags, but just know that each time I see one I squee in delight and my day gets just a little bit better and easier to deal with 💜🐺

Second, and not as important, do you sell prints? I wish to coat my office in your knights. But I also totally understand if you just do this for the fun of it and don't want to deal with the exhaustion of monetizing it 💜

Anyway, thank you for letting me ramble and continuing to provide the goodest food on my dash.

- Nel 💜🐺

thanks so much for the praise, it means the world to know that people get a kick out of my silly little hunks :)))

truth be told, they help me a lot with my morale as well, and it's amazing if I can share a little bit of joy

I mostly do this for fun and to give as gifts, but I've had people ask several times and maybe I'll get there, eventually

however, setting up a shop and figuring out the logistics of mailing, pricing, etc. is more than I'm able to deal with at the moment, for a number of reasons (not least having never done anything of the sort before)

but with every request, the likelihood of me getting around to it increases ! and it is quite tempting to send those becheeked blackguards around the world...

thanks again, your message really brightened my day

[hiddenbeks]

ocs as types of suffering + tragic love archetypes

tagged by @hibernationsuit to do a couple quizzes for some ocs, thank u red!!

tagging @narrayya @grimhygge @famewolf @abetterbeginning to do one or both of the quizzes if u want to, no pressure! suffering quiz here, tragic love quiz here <3

did the first quiz for my da girls:

ANDRALE MAHARIEL - yearning

"the pain in your chest bubbles knowing that what you want may never be yours. You're lost in a fantasy world, or consumed by what you wish you were or had as opposed to what you do. it's hard to appreciate what's around you when you're appreciating the hope of what could be instead."

yknow i often consider andrale my most well adjusted oc. she had a relatively stable childhood with friends and loving family. and despite developing a resentment of the world that hates her people as she grows older and desiring a world where things are different she's still mostly satisfied with her life? but this all changes after she becomes a warden. the first months are especially difficult as she's still in denial about her fate and the fact that she's never going back to her old life and indeed yearns for all that she has lost. she eventually learns to live again and enjoy her new life as best she can but she will always carry that sadness and regret and longing with her i think. you may see her happy and content one moment and the next she's staring blankly at nothing, lost in her memories of simpler days.

FRIDA HAWKE - self inadequacy

"you crack under the weight of your own perceived inability. how can you be enough for anyone else when you're just barely enough for yourself? insecurity causes you to have little backbone, and so you fail to reach your full potential when it comes to what you're best at. you sabotage opportunities with fear you'll fail before you've begun. it hurts to never feel like your best is enough, but setting your standards too high or too low ensures it."

i was fully expecting to get 'the giver' as a result for frida but this is accurate too! she never believes she is enough as a daughter or big sister or stand-in parent to the twins or champion or. anything. poor gal believes it's her job to carry the weight of the world and blames herself for not being or doing enough when she inevitably fails. oof

CELYN SURANA - loneliness

"your heart feels full of the connection you feel you lack. no matter how many people are around, strangers or not... someone is missing. you don't know who, what, or if you'll ever find them. you're unsure if there's a person out there who'll really satisfy your life, so really what's the point of continuing to look?"

hmm! celyn was indeed lonely at the circle save for jowan but i have to wonder if it was her own doing. though to be fair i doubt the circle fosters an environment supportive of making friends and forming genuine connections. and obviously the fact that it's partly her own doing doesn't make it any less painful. anyway. celyn put friendships aside in favor of studying and being The Very Best, hoping that advancement in the circle would bring her at least a tiny bit of autonomy and respect. this all leads to a hopeless loop of "i'm lonely and want friends" "don't know how to make friends so i won't even try". she slowly gets better after leaving the circle when andrale and friends coax/force her out of her shell because they need to work togetheeerrr. there's no team-building exercise quite like the blight and the impending end of the world am i right haha

anyway next up some tragic love:

ISABEAU MONET - caníbales; devourer

"love's a knife to skin to you, a vein to woven muscle, blood puddle before you. you listened to all the promises of a stranger's relief and feel the drain of a shower head running it all down again. you committed another murder; kissed and bruised skin with a clench to a quivering wrist and went home in the deafening quiet of a taxi. there's mold covered rage within you. if to take a heart home with you, you'd bite your way through muscle and ribcage first. pleasure comes, but there will be no devouring past it. there is fear in settling down and being seen. there is a glass screen between these bodies and you. relax your tight jaw and feel the real canine fear beneath that scabbed up cavity. the sacrifice of opening up is needed if to be loved as you deeply wish inside. desire doesn't discriminate between hands and spoken word. why should you?"

wowie!! i rarely get serious about isabeau because she's mostly a fun and sexy menace and has convinced even me that that's all there is to her but like. i shouldn't forget that she too is damaged underneath it all 😔 what twenty years of emotional neglect and lack of support from parents does to a gal...

[roosterbirds]

Legitimate question, and not truing to start anything, mostly because I haven't been keeping up with rt/AH at all but want to know if more problematic shit has come up.

but why don't you like Geoff?

I find him overrated and annoying. The subreddit annoys me with the constant ass-kissing, especially since it was announced he has a THIRD podcast, a solo one where he just talks about random shit. No content creator should have or host three concurrent podcasts, in my opinion.

I've noticed in content that he almost needs to make himself the center of attention and gets *really* pushy about making everything into content**, making bits to monetize or merch out of. This is most noticeable in F**kace, where I've made my stance pretty clear that I think it sucks, and that I only listen out of obligation as a Gavin fan because it's like pulling teeth to get any new non-SMG content that features him.

In hindsight to all the problematic stuff that has come out of the woodwork, especially regarding how he handled AH, he comes off as someone very out of touch with how to be professional in running a department or a business, even though he had prior experience with working at a call center. He's a grown man who should have known better that when his employees act shitty towards each other off camera, he should have stepped in and nipped it in the bud, but he didn't because at times, he himself enabled it. His alcoholism is no excuse for allowing shitty behavior to propagate and his apologies and statements every time something problematic happens have become almost disingenuous in hindsight. (btw, I think that *all* content creators are problematic in some way or form because they are still human beings after all; some are just better than others at not showing it.)

Even though he says on multiple occasions that Jack and Gavin are his closest friends, how come he treats them the worst, like laughing at Jack when Jack got robbed, or randomly bursting into Gavin's room when he lived with the Ramseys that at times Gavin would prop something under the door to keep him out? Like, I get friendly ribbing at times, but there are moments in content where I feel it crosses a line into a toxic friendship where he needs to have someone latch onto him or have someone be his punching bag.

This man's antics have worn thin over time and I cannot bring myself to care anymore.

** i think he even attempted to make content out of his then-failing marriage, which i still think is really weird.

[dearweirdme]

https://www.tumblr.com/dearweirdme/718754748961062912/so-what-are-your-genuine-thoughts-on-jikook?source=share

the rose bowl moment, watch it again. jimin wasn't crying until jungkook whispered in his ear. whatever jungkook said made jimin emotional and jungkook pushed him over the edge after sucking his ear.

the GCFs, after jungkook posted GCFT, namjoon told him to make one with tae if he wanted millions of views, but jungkook didn't. and in the next few years the company started monetizing his GCFs and making him do them for work related stuff, so he stopped doing them altogether. which tells me that Jungkook can pretty much decide for himself to do whatever he wants. if he wanted to make a GCF for tae he would've. if he wanted to give tae the most screentime he would've. but as the company started OT7-fying his GCFs over the years he stopped doing them, period. because it wasn't genuine or fun anymore. and he himself admitted to this in the 2020 youtube live.

also, bang pd is an ally of the community, you can see tweets on his twitter proving this like reading BL, he bought jo kwon his first pair of high heels, and he even had the members study troye sivan's blue neighborhood series i believe. he seems pretty much supportive and i believe that if he knows about two members dating each other he won't get in their way. of course he'll warn them about accidentally outing themselves but they're grown men who know what's good for them, if the boys wanted to push and test the fans’ limits about homosexuality he won't stop them. that's why i believe bighit allowed for GCFT to be published, it's not explicitly LGBTQIA+ but the message is there. the editing being inspired by a bf/gf vlog tutorial shot by shot, the queer-coded song by a queer artist that bang pd himself had bts listen to. it's there.

that's why i also believe that a lot of the sus stuff that jikook do and doesn't get edited out is because they're allowing them to test waters as a queer couple (this is all based on my belief that bh allows the members to do whatever they want as long as it isn't hurting the group, and relationships in general are not bad but the guys are still advised to keep it a secret. i don't think they're strictly prohibited to announce relationships), in case they wanted to let the world know one day, they need to test reactions first.

jimin leaving a bite mark (read: hickey) on jungkook's neck when they were drinking alone at night can be widely misunderstood, they know that, and frankly quite disrespectful to tae as well if him and Jungkook are actually dating. him and tae might not be able to let people know they're dating, but it isn't necessary to mislead people into thinking that he might be dating another member. and a hickey does exactly that. they could've covered it by makeup and called it a day as to not stir the pot, but the didn't. so bh are not okay with taekook showing any suspicious activities but it's okay if jungkook does it with another member? it still puts a target on jungkook's back, and jimin's as well. what it looks like to me is that it was okay for jimin and jungkook, to let people know what jikook were up to the night before, even if it looks wrong, they didn't care. and tae doesn't have an issue with it because he's not actually dating jungkook so it doesn't matter what people might assume about jikook. i'm pretty sure tae wouldn't want the fandom to think his bf and bff are fucking when he's not even allowed to be close to jungkook.

which brings me to this, the closeness part. if bh are really trying to hide taekook's relationship, how is it that taekook are being loud right now when there's no changes to their contracts yet? it's still the same since 2020. tkkrs say that taekook are now trying to let the whole world know they're together, (which doesn't make sense to me considering the timing and the looming military service in a homophobic country) and that they're more free in chapter 2, but their contracts haven't changed since 2020 (or was it 2018? i can't remember). where did the change come from? if bighit suddenly decided to go easy on them and allow them to do whatever they want, like attend premieres and stuff together, then where did jennie come from? where does she fall into all of this?

i've seen tkkrs say that tae is using jennie as a beard to hide his sexuality, (either bh forced him or it was his choice to protect himself) but if that's true, then why would bh forced him to do it? are they giving taekook room or are they not?

and if it's tae's choice, how is he hiding a relationship but being loud about it at the same time? it's not necessary to have a beard if you ask me. it would've been more efficient if him and Jungkook just laid low, no beards necessary, instead of being loud right before enlistment but hiding it with a beard.

but i've also seen tkkrs of bh forcing tae into a straight relationship to hide taekook, while also accusing bh of forcing jikook to do fan service to hide taekook. how does it make sense for one to look straight but the other be unapologetically gay? just because he's being gay with another man? so bh are offering protection to tae but are endangering Jungkook? right ahead of military service? and endangering jimin as well who doesn't even have to be involved in all of this?

and why do tae and jk seem like they're not on the same page? tae is always the one letting everyone know what him and jungkook are up to, but jungkook never does this. he does much longer lives and more frequently but he barely mentions anything about him and tae. you could argue it's because jungkook is the more private one but that doesn't make sense honestly, if him and tae wanted to let ppl know then they would've definitely took the decision together and made it equally obvious, but tae is the one who's doing the most out of the two. he comes online for minutes to mention jungkook and leave, while jungkook comes online for hours and doesn't mention taehyung at all. he even did a whole live watching jimin content; if him and tae had plans to make it clear who they're dating, then why is jk still blurring the line? there's so many loopholes and contradictions, it just doesn't add up.

Hi anon!

Thank you for your polite ask. I don't think we'll be agreeing on things, so this will probably be my last reply, I see little use in a Taekook vs Jikook discourse going on for a long time. There's a lot of grey inbetween black and white, that is mostly where I reside

I have looked at the Rosebowl footage again. This clip:

I see Jimin put his hand on his mouth (indicating him starting to cry) at 0:18 seconds and have not seen Jk wisper in his ear before that moment. Jk starts to comfort Jimin at 0:24 seconds and he does cry harder after that, but to me it just seems like he was already overwhelmed and that just intensified because of reasons beyond Jk. I still stand by my former observations.

the GCFs, after jungkook posted GCFT, namjoon told him to make one with tae if he wanted millions of views, but jungkook didn't. and in the next few years the company started monetizing his GCFs and making him do them for work related stuff, so he stopped doing them altogether. which tells me that Jungkook can pretty much decide for himself to do whatever he wants. if he wanted to make a GCF for tae he would've. if he wanted to give tae the most screentime he would've. but as the company started OT7-fying his GCFs over the years he stopped doing them, period. because it wasn't genuine or fun anymore. and he himself admitted to this in the 2020 youtube live.

But isn't Namjoon telling Jk to film one with Tae an indication of it not being more than friendship? Namjoon doesn't treat it as something special, and he knows way more than we do. Also (from my point of view), Jk making a GCF about Tae would be so personal, I don't think Jk wants to share that intimate part of his life. I think Jk had the option to stop doing them, I don't think he had the option to do as he pleases. I think it very possible even that he stopped doing GCF's because he did not have that freedom. Whether or not Bang pd is an ally or not, every Kpop band... every band/artist in general will have image clauses in their contract. It is not even to control them in their everyday lives, it is to protect the band and the label in case someone is having a lapse in judgement. And no matter how much Bang pd trusts the members, he knows they are young and he knows that young people make lapses in judgement. He will always choose to protect his business and by extension BTS. This is probably where you and I disagree in most, because you think BTS members have a lot of freedom, and while I would agree that they probably have more freedom than other Kpop bands, I don't think that freedom extends to showing whatever they want to the world. . Bts never talk about dating, there are other topics that they don't touch... it's clear that they have opinions, but they don't go into some things in depth.

also, bang pd is an ally of the community, you can see tweets on his twitter proving this like reading BL, he bought jo kwon his first pair of high heels, and he even had the members study troye sivan's blue neighborhood series i believe. he seems pretty much supportive and i believe that if he knows about two members dating each other he won't get in their way. of course he'll warn them about accidentally outing themselves but they're grown men who know what's good for them, if the boys wanted to push and test the fans’ limits about homosexuality he won't stop them. that's why i believe bighit allowed for GCFT to be published, it's not explicitly LGBTQIA+ but the message is there. the editing being inspired by a bf/gf vlog tutorial shot by shot, the queer-coded song by a queer artist that bang pd himself had bts listen to. it's there.

I will amend that it is possible to read a queer message into the GCF. But, I still think it is not meant to be romantic. If Jimin is also queer, it is very possible that it is just a general statement. Like the Saipan GCF, If I were to search for a deeper meaning behind the music choice, I feel those lyrics "I don't wanna hide no-more" are meant to be from Jimin's perspective in general. He has alluded to having been afraid to show himself, his softer side. I don't think it's intended to point at their 'relationship' but to point at how they feel in general. All other GCF's are kinda an example of that I feel.

that's why i also believe that a lot of the sus stuff that jikook do and doesn't get edited out is because they're allowing them to test waters as a queer couple (this is all based on my belief that bh allows the members to do whatever they want as long as it isn't hurting the group, and relationships in general are not bad but the guys are still advised to keep it a secret. i don't think they're strictly prohibited to announce relationships), in case they wanted to let the world know one day, they need to test reactions first.

It's quite a leap (in SK) to go from being an ally to the queer community to actually allowing members to go public if they so choose. SK is really not that far yet. They are making steps, but it's tiny ones. At this point, queerness isn't even a topic Idols speak about freely. I feel, that the first step to take, is to allow Idols to publicly date in general. BTS might be allowed to date in private (we don't know) but not one of them has ever gone public, to me that shows that it is unlikely that its a possibility for them. SK is hardly ready for that. Having a queer couple test the waters at this point in time just doesn't seem realistic to me.

So I think one of our biggest disagreements is that you think they are free to do what they want, and I don't. I think history and standards right now show us that SK and Kpop are still very conservative, and while exceptions are ofcourse possible, I've not seen enough evidence to support that idea right now.

jimin leaving a bite mark (read: hickey) on jungkook's neck when they were drinking alone at night can be widely misunderstood, they know that, and frankly quite disrespectful to tae as well if him and Jungkook are actually dating. him and tae might not be able to let people know they're dating, but it isn't necessary to mislead people into thinking that he might be dating another member. and a hickey does exactly that. they could've covered it by makeup and called it a day as to not stir the pot, but the didn't. so bh are not okay with taekook showing any suspicious activities but it's okay if jungkook does it with another member? it still puts a target on jungkook's back, and jimin's as well. what it looks like to me is that it was okay for jimin and jungkook, to let people know what jikook were up to the night before, even if it looks wrong, they didn't care. and tae doesn't have an issue with it because he's not actually dating jungkook so it doesn't matter what people might assume about jikook. i'm pretty sure tae wouldn't want the fandom to think his bf and bff are fucking when he's not even allowed to be close to jungkook.

Another anon of mine talked about this yesterday and maybe you've read that post also.

But let me point out some stuff. It's not a hickey. Jimin didn't describe it as a hickey, he said it was a bite. It looks like a bite also, so it is one. Jikookers are the ones romanticising this by calling it a hickey. I think they didn't edit it out, because people who actually know Jk and Jimin, know what their friendship is like and this is just normal. You and I operate under different believes on how much freedom they are allowed, so to you this is testing the waters, but to me it's just normal friendly, teasing, playfull behavior between friends. Men/boys can be playfull and intimate like this without it being romantic in nature. Maybe the company doesn't actually mind people making of it what they will, it is common knowledge that shipping in Kpop is encouraged. And maybe they know that when people would actually look into Jk and Jimins relationship they wouldn't find anything scandalous there. It's riskfree, because it's just friendship. It was oke to let people know what they were up to the night before, because it wasn't special. You don't know what Tae's initial reaction to that bite was, because we haven't seen the moment he found out. This reaction of him was after having already processed the situation. I can show you some reactions of Tae witnessing Jimin and Jk when his initial reaction wasn't him being fine with things.

But also, how unproffessional would it be if Jimin and Jk were to actually be this 'romantically inclined' as you all seem to think. These are professional men. It's not them being flirty and romantic, it's them being playfull, because playfullness is welcome in this setting, while actual romance would be not.

which brings me to this, the closeness part. if bh are really trying to hide taekook's relationship, how is it that taekook are being loud right now when there's no changes to their contracts yet? it's still the same since 2020. tkkrs say that taekook are now trying to let the whole world know they're together, (which doesn't make sense to me considering the timing and the looming military service in a homophobic country) and that they're more free in chapter 2, but their contracts haven't changed since 2020 (or was it 2018? i can't remember). where did the change come from? if bighit suddenly decided to go easy on them and allow them to do whatever they want, like attend premieres and stuff together, then where did jennie come from? where does she fall into all of this?

I don't think they're being especially loud right now. I think Tae has always (except for the time they were being separated) mentioned and singled out Jk as much as he does now. It's just been more obscured, because other members were more present, there were more lives in general, and as bandmembers actively doing BTS stuff Tae mentioning Jk could always be played of as 'work'. It's more pronounced now... because it's clear that it isn't just work. I'm not all Taekookers, and I don't agree with those saying that they want to announce their relationship to the world. I don't think BigHit is now taking things easy on them, I think this is just how they are. I do see a strong possibility of Tae and Jk doing promo together like Yoongi and Jimin, but that still has to be seen. You see change, I see them just being.

i've seen tkkrs say that tae is using jennie as a beard to hide his sexuality, (either bh forced him or it was his choice to protect himself) but if that's true, then why would bh forced him to do it? are they giving taekook room or are they not?and if it's tae's choice, how is he hiding a relationship but being loud about it at the same time? it's not necessary to have a beard if you ask me. it would've been more efficient if him and Jungkook just laid low, no beards necessary, instead of being loud right before enlistment but hiding it with a beard.

I think Jennie and Tae is mostly promo. Taennie stuff keeps coming up at times when promo is to be suspected. So I wouldn't be surprised if something were to come up when The Idol hits the public (soon, very soon... so maybe they'll also just ride the Cannes wave out) and especially when Tae's album comes out (not too sure when Jennie has stuff coming out... so bring that in the mix as well). I think a side effect of this pr-relationship is that it gives Tae a nice cover for the queer rumors, which, with the enlistment approaching, could come in handy. So yeah, I don't think Tae is being especcially loud. I do think he agreed to it. You might think it unnecessary to have a beard (I certainly do, because I feel everyone should just be able to love who they want), but you and I are not the ones calling the shots. From a business perspective they might've felt this was the best way to go. It’s nothing new, it happens more often than one would think.

but i've also seen tkkrs of bh forcing tae into a straight relationship to hide taekook, while also accusing bh of forcing jikook to do fan service to hide taekook. how does it make sense for one to look straight but the other be unapologetically gay? just because he's being gay with another man? so bh are offering protection to tae but are endangering Jungkook? right ahead of military service? and endangering jimin as well who doesn't even have to be involved in all of this?

You get so offended by the mere mention of fanservice. It's not a bad thing. I have no problem admitting Jk and Tae did fanservice. It doesn't mean it's not also something real. It's not like managers stand next to the camera's and go "and now hug!". It's placing members together more often and encouraging them to be playfull. It's making editing choices by choosing footage of one couple of members more often than the the other. It's choosing couples whose chemistry you feel suit what you want people to think of BTS as a whole. It's not saying "you have to act gay". (what does happen though, is Tae and Jk being told to tone it down and seperate) Most interactions you call unapologetically gay, aren't that to me. Fandom has a knack for appointing something as queer, that doesn't mean that's what the company intended. I do think they let fandoms lean into their ships quite a lot, but fanservice isn't necessarily intended to make members appear queer. It's intended to make them look close. Companies always want to control the narrative. Why do you think VMin isn't a bigger ship than it is? It's because they made sure to lock that narrative down for you. VMin are called soulmates, even had a friendship song. It's so it wasn't possible to appoint Tae and Jk soulmates. Why do you think Jk and Tae's "estrangement" has been explicitely mentioned? Trouble between bandmembers would normally be something that's hidden. It's not good for their overall image if two members appear to have clashed. It's been pointed out, because they had to come up with a reason for things looking strange and taking a turn directly after (I'm talking about the ITS Taekook 'date', I'm going to make a post about Tae and Jk's 'grown appart' years soon, because that is such nonsense). They never had to come up for a narrative between Jk and Jimin, because they are just friends.

and why do tae and jk seem like they're not on the same page? tae is always the one letting everyone know what him and jungkook are up to, but jungkook never does this. he does much longer lives and more frequently but he barely mentions anything about him and tae. you could argue it's because jungkook is the more private one but that doesn't make sense honestly, if him and tae wanted to let ppl know then they would've definitely took the decision together and made it equally obvious, but tae is the one who's doing the most out of the two. he comes online for minutes to mention jungkook and leave, while jungkook comes online for hours and doesn't mention taehyung at all. he even did a whole live watching jimin content; if him and tae had plans to make it clear who they're dating, then why is jk still blurring the line? there's so many loopholes and contradictions, it just doesn't add up.

So I don't think they want the world to know and I do strongly believe it's because Jk is more private. He rarely mentions anyone outside of BTS stuff. He'll mention members' songs when they get released, he'll mention a member commenting on his live, but not much aside from that. He does mention Tae, and I think Tae is the only one he mentioned while not referencing BTS stuff, but I have no list of moments to point to.. so I'm not able to proof this. But one thing is extremely clear. They do meet up in private. They meet up when hanging out with friends, it's not always made publicly and it's quite frequently. I'm sure Jimin and Jk and Jimin and Tae have also met, but... the thing missing is actual proof of that. So while I am able to actually point to times Tae and Jk have seen each other, you are not. People are all different anon. Do you and your partner act the same, do your parents, do your friends and their partners? It's not weird if one partner communicates differently from the other; it's life.

My Taekook story isn't complicated at all and it has very little holes and contradictions. They fell in love, they couldn't be open about it, they were hidden, stuff happens to keep them safe.

[shortkingshapeshiftr]

Finishing the Fourth Book! - The Seekers Book Discussion #5

Getting through the last nine or so chapters was kind of difficult this time around. Strangely, I lost a lot of motivation to finish this issue and I don't know why. But that doesn't matter, because I blasted though it and now I've officially completed the fourth installment of the Seekers series: The Last Wilderness!

SPOILERS: Entirety of the 4th Seekers book (The Last Wilderness)

One of the main themes in this issue is trying to find one's place. All three of the bears express interest in going on their own way, doing things that correlate to their species. Toklo wants to hunt in the mountains like a brown bear, Kallik wants to go back to the ice like a polar bear, and Lusa wants to hang around in the trees like an American black bear. Ujurak on the other hand does not conform to this, as he believes that there is a greater role they all must play in this world. Everyone besides Ujurak believes that everything is fine, and that the Last Wilderness is a haven of prosperity and peace that will last forever. Later on the book, we will soon learn that the Last Wilderness, and many parts of North America, are in great peril.

After transforming into a seabird and joining a flock, Ujurak accidentally ingests a fish hook which almost costs him his life. In the form of a human, or "flat-face," the three bears bring him to a local village, a place where the humans live alongside the flora and fauna. I think it is fair to say that the book infers that these are indigenous people native to the Alaska/North America area. Ujurak is taken care of by Tiinchuu, an older man who also has an "animal spirit" similar to Ujurak. As I previously mentioned in another post, Ujurak has multiple "spirits" and is capable of physically shifting, whereas Tiinchuu only has one (the hare) and can only shift in dreams. Tiinchuu, at the moment, is the only human character that knows of Ujuraks shape-shifting abilities. Then... the bad humans in suits come. It is revealed to us that the "senator" of the area and his businessmen want to tear up the Last Wilderness to gain more oil from the natives land. After hijinks ensue, Ujurak is taken away from the village and flown to a hospital. The rest of the book is Ujurak finding more info about oil and human society, Kallik and Lusa trying to save Ujurak, and Toklo eating shit.

After completing this issue, I'm still left wondering: "How's this issue going to resolve?" Man-made climate change is the main issue here, and these four bears are destined to "save the wilderness." I'm worried that they may half-ass this plot element, or not meaningfully address it. It's a pretty big and existential issue to take on, especially for non-human characters who don't know the full scope of what's happening. We don't really get an answer at the end of this issue, but Ujurak does harshly acknowledge that greed, oil and monetizing the destruction of the environment will scar the world and its inhabitants. Ujurak towards the end of the book has a sort of breakdown, one where he transforms into different species and writhes in agony at the horrific visions of the future. Kallik seems to acknowledge that after Ujurak came back from the hospital, his attitude and demeanor has changed. I hate to use very online lingo, but it's almost like he's become a doomer. He's become more uncharacteristically serious and sure about his purpose to save the wild. Unlike a doomer, Ujurak is now more motivated than ever. Ujurak knows that the world is dying, and he states that he will fight to save it. It leaves me feeling kind of intrigued, it mirrors that sense of existential dread and urge to survive knowing the horrors of climate change. I like it, I like his spirit and I hope they continue building upon his strong will and good heart. I'm just hoping they don't mess it up.

I don't have that much else to say about this issue in particular. For a book with thirty-four chapters, it felt like not as much happened. I will say though that I am still interested in seeing where this series will go, given what our characters know now. They have a big journey ahead of them. I'll try to keep up the pace with the next and 5th installment, Seekers: Fire in the Sky. 🐻‍❄️