#bacon is my favorite food

[icewindandboringhorror]

What would you choose? :0c

(note: original image is from HERE (link) - but I edited it to add a wider variety of options.. also added $3 extra to the total, even though I know that makes it more uneven lol, I thought if you're adding 10 whole extra items, the money to spend should at least be increased slightly, if that makes sense..)

[spidvrbatz]

Green Lantern Comfort Board - Gift

x - x - x

x - x - x

x - x - x

I'm so excited to gift this to you @nothaljordan !!! i have another one for u as well but that'll prolly be tmrw night!! I hope you like it T-T n that I characterized ur dad the right way

(as always, look in tags for hc's 🥳)

[sugared-violets]

breaking: local woman gone "drunk with power" after remembering delivery apps exist

[waitineedaname]

favorite thing to make for breakfast

on most days when i don't have much time, I usually just do an everything bagel + whipped cream cheese, BUT if I have time and I feel special, I make myself a breakfast sandwich! everything bagel + fried egg + sharp cheddar cheese + vegetarian bacon. usually I'll have a little something on the side too, lately it's been a sliced apple because I have. so many apples. but sometimes I'll slice up small potatoes and saute them!

[dufrau]

Just ate a bacon egg and cheese on an english muffin with approx 2x as much hot sauce as was probably called for and it was a religious experience. Breakfast sandwich is the perfect food. 

[rabbitcruiser]

National Donut Day 

National Donut Day falls each year on the first Friday of June and we are getting geared up to savor our best-loved fried dough confections. Have you ever resisted eating one? It’s certainly an uphill battle. Fortunately, National Donut Day falls this year on June 7. Be sure to visit your favorite donut shop, choose a variety of chewy deep-fried goodness, and enjoy.

When is National Donut Day 2024?

The favorite treat of Barack Obama, Homer Simpson, and the cops is celebrated on National Donut Day on June 7.

History of National Donut Day

At one point or another in our lives, we’ve found ourselves craving a donut. When we think about it, it’s not really a surprise that this treat hits the spot like no other. They pair exceptionally well with tasty hot beverages, they can be had as a quick snack or to accompany a long conversation. Most of all, there’s a donut out there for all of us; from traditional glaze to daring recipes such as maple-bacon donuts.   The origins of National Donut Day are traced to The Salvation Army’s involvement in World War I. During this time, a group of volunteers was dispatched to the frontlines with the mission of providing comforting meals for the troops. They soon found out that donuts were an effective way to provide food while navigating the difficulties of cooking in very dire circumstances. These brave volunteers would later be known as “donut lassies”. They would even use war helmets as a utensil to fry up seven donuts at a time.   In 1938 “Donut Day” was established as a way to honor the members of the Salvation Army that came to the aid of soldiers during World War I. Nowadays, National Donut Day is widely celebrated on the first Friday of June. Many donut shops are known to give them our for free, giving a good reason to take some time out of the day to enjoy this most cherished treat.

National Donut Day timeline

1809 Donuts Arrive from the Netherlands

One of the earliest accounts of donuts are attributed to Dutch settlers that brought them over to New York.

1918 Donuts to the Rescue!

The Salvation Army sets up canteens in the frontlines of World War I to provide care and donuts for soldiers.

1920 Donuts Go Industrial

Adolph Levitt, a refugee from Russia designs a gadget to help him keep up with the demand for donuts at his shop.

1989 A Donut Fanatic Appears

'The Simpsons' is aired for the first time and the world is introduced to Homer, a true donut lover.

Traditions of the Day

The traditions for National Donut Day are simple; eat as many donuts as you can, in as many varieties and flavors as possible. But seriously, this is exactly how the day is traditionally celebrated every year. The donut has come a long way, and is now available in so many delightful variations, how can one resist not trying them all? Whether it is jam-filled donuts, or Bavarian cream, or a good old chocolate glazed original, donuts are enjoyed and celebrated by children and adults alike all over the country.

Food marketing agencies love National Donut Day and donut franchises have deals on their menu as well as special donut flavors prepared just for this day. There is a lot of competition for cops at donut shops, with lines of people clamoring to get their donut fix. Donuts are also cooked at home — a great activity for the family, especially for the kids, who get to decorate their donuts with different icings and toppings.

By the Numbers

10 billion – the number of donuts made in the U.S. each year.

10 – the number of people living in America with ‘Donut’ as their surname.

13 – the number of people who have ‘Donut’ as their first name.

2480 – the city of Boston has one donut shop for every 2,480 people.

20 – the number of donuts Renée Zellweger ate every day to gain weight for the sequel of “Bridget Jones’s Diary.”

9 – the Guinness World Record for the most powdered donuts eaten in three minutes.

201.02 million – the number of donuts consumed by Americans in 2020.

100,000 – the number of donuts churned out by Entenmann’s every hour.

3,660 – the number of donuts it will take to reach the top of the Statue of Liberty.

55 million – the number of donuts it would take to get from Long Beach, California, to Long Island, New York.

National Donut Day Activities

Go on a donut adventure

Share the love

Fry ‘em up

Visit a local donut shop but don’t go for your usual, instead allow yourself to experiment with different flavors

Pick out a variety of donuts to share with your teammates, neighbors or clients that visit your business. A sweet treat queue can go a long way.

Making your own donuts can be an exciting experience to share with friends and family. Tap into your creativity by choosing an array of toppings.

5 Delicious Facts About Donuts

Dutch settlers had a different name for them

They didn’t always have a hole

They exist in math

There’s a lot of them

Donuts can be luxurious

They called them “olykoeks”, which translates to, oily cakes.

These first versions were simply made up of a fried dough, omitting their now characteristic shape.

In geometry, the shape of a donut is known as a Torus.

It’s estimated that 10 billion donuts are sold in the United States.

A donut filled with champagne and topped with 24 karat gold can be purchased for hefty fee.

Source

[actual-corpse]

Pray ya boi can get SNAP benefits...

I wanna be able to afford going pescatarian.

[magnys-voss]

I love how my tisms makes it so easy for people to know what to get if they’re around me long enough.

Ordering Taco Bell? Yeah I always want the same order. Picking up vapes? Of course I always want mint, thank you. Getting snacks? Yup, same as always please. I’m so low maintenance in that aspect.

Just feed me the same snacks like a dog and I’m gonna be so freakin happy and satisfied.

[heavenlydreamangelflyhigh]

delicious vegan restaurants are always ran by cults and it scares the fuck out of me because that absolutely ropes people in

[therevengeoffrankenstein]

found and ate some instant potatoes that were 'bacon flavored' but had no actual meat in them.

[darknight3904]

You're a Liar

𝕊𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪: ɪɴ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪꜱᴄᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴋᴇʟᴇᴛᴏɴꜱ ɪɴ ᴄᴏʀɪᴏʟᴀɴᴜꜱ' ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇᴛ.

ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴏɴᴇ / ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛᴡᴏ / ᴍʏ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ

𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: ᴄᴏʀɪᴏʟᴀɴᴜꜱ ꜱɴᴏᴡ (ʜᴇ ɪꜱ ʙᴀᴅ ᴇɴᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴀ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ)

ꜱᴏʀʀʏ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴛᴏᴏᴋ ꜱᴏ ʟᴏɴɢ. ɪ ʜᴀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ᴍʏ ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ ꜰɪɴᴀʟꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇɴ ɪ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ᴀʟʟ ᴏꜰ ɢᴏᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴏᴛᴅ ꜱᴏ ɪ'ᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴅᴀᴇᴍᴏɴ/ᴀᴇᴍᴏɴᴅ ᴛᴀʀɢᴀʀʏᴇɴ ʙʀᴀɪɴ ʀᴏᴛ.

Mornings might just be your favorite time of day. The way the sun just barely peaked through the curtains and shimmered its way across the bedspread made your shared room with Coriolanus look simply divine.

Mornings might just be your favorite time of day. The delicious scent of bacon and freshly cooked pancakes wafted through the mansion and under your closed door. The promise of fresh orange juice and perfectly hot coffee was enough to rouse anyone from their slumber.

Mornings might just be your favorite time of day. Coriolanus is still asleep beside you. Curly hair is splayed on the pillow, free from whatever styling gel he put in it. His face is relaxed and peaceful as you run your fingertips across his forehead and down the bridge of his nose. The stress of being president is gone from his face when he sleeps and that's how you know, mornings are your favorite time of day.

"I can feel you staring at me."

His voice was still muddled with sleep, deep and scratchy as he batted at your hands trying to keep them off his gorgeous face.

"I'm appreciating the art in front of me," You smile as he finally opens his eyes.

"Your hands on my face are making my nose itch." He says grabbing your right hand and gently squeezing it as he sits up beside you.

You hum a tune of acknowledgment and take in his appearance. Coriolanus' pale skin was a wonderful sight to behold as the blanket slipped and fell into his lap.

"You're staring again." He says playing with your fingers

"An incredibly attractive man seems to be missing his shirt, can you blame me for staring?" You state a playful smile pulling on your lips.

Coriolanus lets out a snort and gets out of bed with a grunt. Long red scratches adorn his back as you watch your fiancee walk across the room towards the bathroom, ready to scrub last night's activities off himself.

Yes, mornings were your favorite time of day. You had warm sunshine, delicious food, and Coriolanus by your side.

But, most of all, mornings were your favorite because you weren't alone.

Coriolanus never truly wanted to leave the bedroom he shared with you. Even now as you groaned and begged him to just lounge around the mansion with you, he wished he could go back to when he felt your soft fingertips brushing the bridge of his nose. He had woken up beside you, cleaned himself, and eaten a wonderful breakfast, now the next step was simple. The next step was attending to his duties as the President of Panem and leaving you to your day in the south wing of the mansion. Despite the tempting idea of staying with you, he knew you'd be eagerly awaiting him, tonight at the dinner table, ready to listen about his day. It was the perfect daily routine and Coriolanus never wanted it to change.

He could feel the press of your lips on his lingering hours later as the newest Head Gamemaker listed detailed plans for the games that were two months away. Dr. Gaul's death had been a blow to the way the Hunger Games functioned as a whole. Now, Coriolanus wasn't sure if the new man chosen for the job was truly the correct choice, he didn't have any of the ruthlessness Gaul had. Sure, he could've stepped in but how would he run the country and dream up deadly traps and mutts for tributes. Sure, he probably could've but that meant so many hours of overtime and leaving you to sleep alone in those overly soft sheets you had hand-picked for your shared bed. This new game maker would just have to do, he didn't want to imagine your sad little face if he didn't sit down for dinner with you each night.

The hours after Coriolanus left you at the breakfast table were terribly boring. There wasn't anything for you to do anymore.Sure, you could've gone shopping or gone to a local park but you hated doing all those things alone. Coriolanus had convinced you that running your Father's weapons company would be overwhelming for you and managed it in your name. As far as you knew it was doing well and was providing many jobs for people in the districts. Everything else in the mansion was tended to by an army of maids and butlers, who were ready at the snap of a finger. So, here you sat in your sunroom that Coriolanus had built as a special place just for you.

You had taken up painting nearly a year ago but your long days of solitude had caused you to quickly run out of inspiration. Now, the paints and easel sat, awaiting your touch but your creativity was gone. You missed Coriolanus and he wouldn't return for another hour. Surely dinner was nearly ready and you wished you were sitting with him, listening to whatever he had spent his day doing. Perhaps you should start a new book before he returns. That'd give you something to tell him about when he did come back.

Maybe the extensive in-home library here would have a book about a lonely woman, wishing for her lover. Maybe there'd be a book all about her and how she spent her days without him and how to pass the time. Maybe, there'd be a book all about her mornings with him and how she never wished for them to come to an end.

It was during these long days that you felt like the loneliest woman in all of Panem. Moments like this made it feel like you were a delicate china doll, only removed from her case to be admired for a few spare moments before being placed back on her shelf.

Two Years Later

Watching. It was something you had gotten good at over the past few months, especially since Coriolanus stopped allowing you to leave the grounds of the mansion. You watched as the boy you grew up with and danced at countless galas faded from view. You tried to welcome the man who sat across from you eating his dinner but it was had more and more difficult as the weeks bled into months and months turned to years. Coriolanus even seldom kissed you now. It hurt even though you knew it was for your own safety. He had admitted it one night in the darkness of your room as he lay beside you. Poison had created sensitive sores in his mouth. You wished he'd stop using it, surely there had to be other ways to do away with enemies.

You felt as though you were withering away, your days were so tedious and you often found yourself eagerly waiting at the dinner table for Coriolanus. Your long days were spent in isolation and you rarely spoke to the staff of the mansion. That didn't stop you from racing to the dining room when the sounds of Coriolanus' return sounded through the halls. Some days it felt like you were a child waiting to tell their parent about their day.

Tonight, it was like your words were falling on deaf ears as Coriolanus was paging through a book while nibbling at the food that had been placed in front of the two of you. Your engagement ring was a dazzling silver as you played with your fingers, wishing he'd look up from whatever knowledge that book might've held.

"Coryo..." You began

"Yes?"

His tone wasn't what you had hoped for. He was annoyed that you were interrupting whatever was on the page in front of him so you didn't elaborate on what you had wanted to say.

Watching. It was something you had gotten good at since there wasn't anything else for you to do.

It was raining the day you found them. You had spent most of the day lounging around and working with the wedding planner Coriolanus had hired so you wouldn't have to do all of the work yourself.

It was nestled in an old shoe box, covered in dust, perfectly hidden behind Coriolanus' clothes on his side of the closet. At first, you had thought it might have been more of Sejanus' things that Coriolanus never gave back to Strabo. Instead what you were met with was worse than a dead boy's things. There, wrapped up in a silky orange scarf sat a single golden earring and an envelope. You swore you could smell lingering perfume on the scarf as you opened the envelope.

It felt like your hands were burning when you finally looked at them. Surely they weren't real. Right?

Two pictures sat in your hands. One of Lucy Gray Baird on some unknown stage, a black guitar in hand. Her pretty dark curls were pulled back and behind her a small group of blurry faces were muddled together, unrecognizable due to the poor lighting. You felt a lump of anxiety and anger swell in your throat when you moved on to the next picture. It was taken as if the subjects of the photo had no knowledge of the camera. Lucy Gray sits on a dilapidated-looking couch with your Coriolanus beside her. Her face was partially obscured as she pressed her lips to his cheek and Coriolanus was smiling, his one arm wrapped securely around her waist.

How long had it been since he smiled like that at you? Perhaps it was even before the reaping that had brought her to the Capitol. When was the last time you saw a truly genuine smile from the boy you grew up with? You wondered how you had missed the way his boyish smiles had transformed into those cruel smirks he donned when things went his way.

Jealousy and sadness burned in your stomach as your mind raced. How long had it been since these photos were taken? It had been nearly 7 years since her games. Coriolanus' head was clearly buzzed in the photo with Lucy which meant it was after he was forced by Highbottom to leave the Capitol. How many times after his return to you had he assured you that nothing had happened between them? How many times had you believed him and his sweet words and actions? How many times had he lied and betrayed you all for another girl who mysteriously disappeared?

Betrayal is what you felt as you pocketed the pictures and slid the box back into its spot behind his fancy coats. Tears were pricking at your eyes as you dressed for dinner, Coriolanus would be back soon and you would confront him about the pictures once he was seated across from you at that dinner table you had sat at hundreds of times.

Dinner is silent as you pick at the cut of steak that was placed on your plate. Coriolanus is talking about how he's on the hunt for another head game maker and how annoying it is but you just can't help but not care. The table that separates you from him makes it feel like a huge ravine has grown between the two of you as you tune him out.

15 years is how long you've known Coriolanus Snow. In those 15 years, you had never dreamed of doing what you were about to do as you removed the pictures from where they sat hidden under your pretty skirt, a floral pattern Coriolanus had picked for your 27th birthday a few months ago. Your heart ached as you slid them across the table to him.

"I found these today. In our closet. Wrapped in your mother's scarf with a gold earring."

You finally have all of Coriolanus' attention as he swallows his food and stops his complaining.

"I thought you said it wasn't romantic. You promised me it wasn't."

Coriolanus glances down at the pictures and reaches out to brush his finger across the one with him and Lucy Gray on that couch.

"You promised, Coryo."

Your voice was breaking. Damn it, don't cry!

"I know I did."

He finally speaks. You wondered what was going through that ridiculously complex mind as he fumbled for his words.

"Then why did you lie? I would've listened if you had just told the truth to begin with." You honestly say.

It's true, you would've heard him out. Maybe you wouldn't have taken him back but you would have at least listened.

"I wasn't thinking straight, okay," He says " I should've told you. I should've gotten rid of that stuff years ago. I don't know why I didn't."

"Yes, you do." You sigh "You love her Coryo. Even now, you're looking for Lucy Gray. That's why you keep me here, you're scared I'll run off like her."

"No, no that's not it. I just...want you to myself." He reasoned

"If that were true you'd let me leave."

"Why do you need to? Everything anyone could ever wish for is right here in this home." He points out, you don't miss the way his fist is clenching, his nails digging into his skin.

"I haven't left the mansion in two years!" You cry, blinking back tears "I feel like some prize you've won and caged up! You don't even let me attend galas anymore."

"You hated those galas. All the nosey reporters and their questions were something you hated. Do you want me to apologize for doing you a favor? I won't. I've done nothing but make your life easier." Coriolanus says

"Yes, you have made my life easier, you've eliminated all challenges I might come across by keeping me here, like a doll." You agree, tone dripping with sarcasm

"Look, if you want you can go to the next gala with me. It's in a week I'll get a designer here tomorrow morning to make you a nice dress." Coriolanus sighed, clearly tired "I don't want to argue with you about petty things"

"Good, then we can argue about these photos." You say, ready to finally hear what he had to say.

"I don't love her. Maybe I did at some point but none of that matters now, I came back to you didn't I?"

Maybe I did at some point.

Hot tears fell from your eyes as you looked down at your feet. How could you be so stupid? Why didn't you see it sooner?

The sound of Coriolanus getting up and walking towards you had you wiping at your face and unattractively sniffing as you tried to fix your runny nose. You didn't want him taking your tears as a sign of weakness. He couched down beside you and pulled your chair out so you were facing him.

"Stop crying." He commands placing his hands on your thighs.

Another fresh set of tears falls from your eyes and Coriolanus brushes them away.

"You're a liar." You say, your voice barely a whisper

"I'm not...I want to be here, with you. I'll let you go back out on your little shopping trips and attend galas, shitty reporters and all."

It's tempting, to agree and let everything perfectly mend itself. But as you glance at the pictures that fell off the table and Lucy Gray's face stares back at you, you feel your heart sink to your feet again.

"You're a liar." You say, this time your voice comes out strong as you push his warm hands from your face

Coriolanus gives you a hard stare but lets you pull away from him.

"You can't even apologize for seeing her." You point out

Coriolanus looks guilty as he disgests your words.

"What happened between the two of you?" You asked

"She ran off, I think. I also had some personal issues after Sejanus was killed. She offered for me to go with her, I almost did." He says

You let out a soft hum of acknowledgment as Coriolanus remains in front of you, on his knees, fiddling with the end of your skirt.

"I don't think I ever really loved her. I think it might've just been the idea of possessing her that I liked." He admits, eyes on the floor

"And how is that different than us now?" You ask

Coriolanus' eyes snap up to yours when the question leaves your lips.

"It's different because...we're us...We grew up together, darling. You ate Tigris' cabbage soup and gave me lunch when I didn't have money for my own."

You swallow the lump in your throat and stand up. Coriolanus immediately rises, not interested in being so much shorter than you. You know what has to come next but you're not sure if you're strong enough to do it. Your actions will close the chapter of a book 15 years in the making.

"Coryo...I think I want to go home." You say looking up at him, fresh tears pool in your eyes.

"You are home. You're with me." He says reaching out and taking your hand in his

"No, I mean...to my family's home. I want my mom, I miss her." You admit, pulling your hand out of his.

Coriolanus' face is confused as you look down at the gorgeous ring he gave you at his proposal. It looked so perfect on your hand when you woke up just this morning but now it felt like a death sentence as you sighed.

"I think you should have this back too..." You say as you slip it off and hold it out to him, "I'm sorry about things ending like this, but if you can't even apologize, I don't think I can stay."

Coriolanus' confusion quickly morphs into anger as he looks at the ring in your hand.

"Put it back on. I'm not letting you walk away." He says, upset

"Coryo, don't make this difficult." You say taking the ring and placing it into the pocket that sits just above his heart in his button-up shirt.

You begin to walk towards the looming archway that marks the entrance to the dining room but you're blocked by an angry Coriolanus Snow, tears in his eyes, fists clenched, and his mouth set in a cold line.

"You're not leaving. I won't let you."

Part Four

Series Masterlist

Taglist:

@10ava01

@i-dont-know-make-it-cool @bxtchopolis @anneliese500 @kitscutie @kiselasmetana @wpdarlingpan @miglielia @anneliese500

@taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese

@ajs-222

@ayyyeeeeidk

@noisymoisu @clintsupremacy @impeterporker @bl0ndelilac @threeinchminimum @starjane312 @ladyslytherin7 @inmyownlittlechair @eclipixels

@ffioncandy @marihoneywk @earth-to-lottie @julesandro @arzua10 @wotcherpeak

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@powernutterbar @supersmexyandhot @dahlias-and-marigolds @literatureluster @spidermoony @lorarri @dilucpegg3r @forevermoremagcon @sarahskywalker-amidala @ms-longbeach@fictionalwhore123 @snowsgames

[elliespassagerprincess]

house wife reader x mean ellie 👀 ellie works long hours on the weekdays and takes out all of her anger on her docile wife who cooks all her meals, does all of her laundry, cleans the entire house, and make sure ellie’s satisfied 24/7.

Satisfied - (ellie williams x housewife reader)

hi anon! mean ellie? hell yeah. I hope you don't mind, but I added my own twist. I hope you enjoy <3

Pairing: mean ellie x housewife fem!reader

requests are open, feel free to leave one!

HUGE warnings: toxic relationships, murder, gore, violence

Summary: in which you were the perfect housewife

authors note: I'm literally trying to empty out my request inbox, so be ready because there's a bunch of fics coming your way!

"so when last have you seen her?" The police officer asked as he sat across you.

"well she went out yesterday and she never came back"

you saw him look at you and Ellie's house as he was taking notes.

"Any arguments?"

"No"

once again you saw the pen write something on some paper. You wanted to know what exactly he was writing about.

What was talking him so long? You wanted him to fucking leave.

"Thank you for answering these questions, we'll call if we need anything else" the officer said as he stood up.

"Thank you for your hard work! Do I need to walk you out?" You asked with smile

"no, I'll show myself out" was all he said as he walked towards the front door.

As soon as he was out of sight you got up and ran to window to check if he was gone. You watched his car pull out the driveway, and you let out a sigh of relief.

fucking finally.

You ran to you and Ellie's shared room, and between heavy breathes you said "she almost caught us baby".

You walked towards the bed, where Ellie's decomposing body lay. Flies circled her body, her skin was pale and cold to the touch.

You put some of her hair behind her ear "it's ok now, they'll never catch us" you whispered

You loved Ellie. And you would anything for you. Anything including quitting your job and becoming her housewife.

In the beginning you hated it, staying home, cooking, cleaning. But when Ellie praised you, you fucking loved it.

And soon after you became the stereotypical housewife. Cute outfits, aprons that matched whatever you wore. You always woke up before her, to prepare her favorite breakfast. You cooked her dinner.

You fucking did everything.

The two of you were happy. Until Ellie got a promotion. She got more work, the pressure was getting worse for the poor girl.

Ellie came home late and most nights she barley even slept. You tried supporting your wife as best you could. You tried cleaning the house before she came come. You did all her laundry, you even chose her outfits most days.

But it was never enough for her.

One night you cooked Ellie's favorite meal. A prideful smile was on your lips as you put the plate in front of her.

This would cheer her up. You knew it would.

Ellie glanced down at the plate, and she looked back at you. The dark circles under her eyes looked even darker than they did yesterday.

"You are so fucking pathetic" she started.

"I work all fucking day to come to this shit? And look, this table is dusty" she added.

Ellie got up from where she was sitting and she threw the plate filled with food onto the floor. "You have cleaning to do, and don't fucking serve this shit again" she walked out of the dining room and you sat there mouth agape.

This was the first time she's ever said anything like that to you. You sobbed in the kitchen that night. You felt sick to your stomach.

Everything you did was for Ellie and for the first time she wasn't satisfied with you.

Your main mission in life became to serve. To serve her. But what do you do when the one you did everything for, wasn't satisfied?

The next morning you woke up bright and early, and you cooked Ellie a widespread of breakfast. Fruit salad, bacon, eggs pancakes and so much more decorated the table.

You heard the bedroom door open and you saw her walk out, she glanced at the table

"I'm not hungry" was all she said and she walked out the front door.

You were shattered.

Since that day everything you did was wrong.

You couldn't clean right.

Her fingers ran along the cupboard, and she looked at you with a frown.

"Can you not clean right? Should i get a maid? Because you cant do shit"

you couldn't do the laundry right.

you stood in the doorway watching Ellie fit on her suit. She looked herself in the mirror before she made eye contact with you.

"It's still wrinkled and there's a stain" she pointed out.

"fix it" was all she said before she threw the clothes on the floor.

You couldn't even cook right.

Ellie only had one spoon of her food before she pushed her plate to the side

"what's wrong?" you asked

"this is disgusting"

it hurts. Every insult Ellie hurled at you hurt.

You knew she was stressed but it didn't give her the right to take her stress out on you.

One night you tried talking to Ellie. But she didn't want to. She didn't have energy for this.

"Don't you have a house to clean? Oh wait you can't even do that right" she said through a chuckle.

You snapped.

You let out a scream as you grabbed the lamp on your side of the bed. You jumped onto the bed, and you shit her over and over again.

"I"

*hit

"am"

*hit

"the perfect"

*hit

"housewife" you yelled.

Blood littered the walls, and your hands. Heavy breathes left your mouth as you looked at the scene.

"Oh Ellie I'm sorry! This room is filthy! I'll clean it"

you scrubbed the walls, you changed the bedding and you gave her a bath.

Everything was back to normal. It was all clean.

You looked at her decomposing body. She looked peaceful and she wasn't being mean anymore.

This was the girl you fell in love with.

You gave her a kiss on the forehead before you muttered "its time for breakfast" and you left the room to start making your girl breakfast.

You weren't sure how long you were going to get away with this, but for the time being you were happy.

She was better dead anyway.

[ariestrxsh]

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⚠️ content warning: ⚠️ smut, fluff, sneaking around, getting caught, oral, risky sex

📝 author's note: 📝 this is the final part of a piece of my writing, and it's not necessary you read the other parts but if you'd like to you'll just have more context and more of a build up :) here is part one, and here is part two 💖

✍️ Summary: ✍️ After a few days of sneaking around with Chris and doing naughty things with him while on a vacation with him and his brothers, you guys plan to have sex for the first time, but the biggest obstacle is hiding it from Nick and Matt.

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road trippin' part three

Once we got out to the lobby, our faces lit up. The glorious aroma of various breakfast foods filled the air. There was coffee, orange juice, sausage, bacon, eggs, potatoes, biscuits and gravy, muffins, hot cereal, any breakfast food we could ever dream of really. We got ourselves plates full of our favorite foods and sat down to eat. We were laughing and smiling, feeding each other, and cracking jokes. I loved being around Chris. Our energies flowed so easily when we were alone together.

Soon, Nick and Matt came down to join us. "Wow, you're up early, Chris," Matt commented. I was normally happy to see the other brothers, but I associated them with having to police myself. Of course I could look at Chris, and laugh at his jokes, but I couldn't stare lovingly into his eyes or get lost in his smile with them around, so I made sure not to let my gaze or my touch linger too long on Chris when we interacted. I realllly did like sneaking around, though. I found myself wondering what Nick or Matt would do if they caught us, or what they would think if they knew their brother had me cumming all over his fingers the night before and cumming all over his tongue this morning. I didn't know why, but the idea of having a little secret and getting found out just made the whole situation that much hotter.

But there was another part of me that didn't want to hide. There was a part of me who wanted to hold his hand and kiss him, and not have to worry about it all being a secret. All four of us spent the day together, mostly hanging out around the hotel, and Chris and I secretly texted back and forth. "Fake sick tonight when Matt and Nick go out for dinner. I'll order us something, and we'll hang out just the two of us for our last night in town," Chris' text read.

Later that night, I put on the oscar-winning performance, Nick and Matt totally bought it. "You know, I think someone should stay here to look after her. She seems pretty sick," Chris said to his brothers. "That's really nice of you, Chris," Nick said, volunteering Chris, which was his plan anyway. Matt shot Chris a look like he knew he was up to something. But they still went out, leaving Chris and me alone.

Food that Chris ordered arrived shortly after the two boys left. Chris and I sat on my bed, feeding each other french fries, drinking our milkshakes, and talking about how we didn't want to leave the next day.

After us talking about our favorite things about the trip and finishing our food, we started kissing, rolling around the bed, messing up all the sheets, and removing our clothes. "I wanna see it," I said, pinching my lip between my teeth while I was straddling Chris. "Yeah, I guess you couldn't see much last night in the dark," Chris said, biting his lip back at me while I fiddled with the waistband of his pajama pants. I climbed off of him so he could take them off. He was already hard, his mushroom tip engorged, and it curved slightly to the left. He curled his fingers around his veiny shaft and started slowly moving it up and down. "Do you like it?" He asked, capturing my attention with the pre-cum glimmering as it slowly formed on the tip. I looked into his dreamy, glazed-over eyes and nodded.

I leaned down and slurped up his juices, and he let out a soft moan. I continued making soft circles with my tongue around the head, and I watched as he tossed his head back, his expression overcome by ecstasy. I wrapped my lips around it and took what I could into my mouth, and stroked the rest with my hand. He lowered his gaze to my mouth and the way I was hungrily taking in so much of him. "Fuck I love watching you do that," Chris whimpered, licking his lips. I loved watching him and the way his face was so expressive about how he was feeling. I focused my attention on the head, licking that sweet spot on the back of his cock where it meets the shaft, and I listened as his delicious sounds filled the room. I created some suction while my tongue danced across all his sensitive areas, and he peered down at me with a look of desperation and desire, his features softening while he started to come undone.

I loved how we didn't have to be quiet, unlike this morning and the night before. I loved experiencing his pleasure vicariously through him, through his sweet little noises and the way his eyebrows furrowed into a tightened expression while I brought him to the edge. I felt his sticky white fluid spurt across my tongue while he throbbed inside of my mouth and let out a final whimper. "Oh my god," Chris uttered breathlessly after he came. I noticed he was way less dominant this time and basically let me have my way with him however I wanted and let me be in complete control of the blowjob, which really turned me on. And I loved leaving him satisfied.

"Please let me ride you," I whispered to Chris after he started to recover from his climax. "Listen, I really want to, but we only have like ten minutes before my brothers walk through that door," Chris said checking his phone, "and honestly I just wanna hold you until then." This made me smile. "Maybe I can ride you tonight after the boys fall asleep," I said, putting my clothes back on and making my bed. "I would fucking love that," Chris said, holding out his arms for me to embrace him. And we cuddled in my bed until Matt's car pulled into the parking lot.

When they walked in, Chris and I were on our own separate beds, ignoring each other. "You feeling any better?" Matt inquired when he saw me. "What? Oh, I mean, a little bit. I think I have a stomach bug," I responded. "A stomach bug, huh? But you were feeling fine enough to eat a burger and fries from Five Guys?" Matt said, examining the trash we hadn't thrown out yet. I shot a look at Chris, unsure what to say. "I ate all that food, idiot. I just got her a milkshake," Chris said, not even looking up at Matt. "Yup. Haven't thrown it up yet," I said, smiling at Matt. He made a disgusted face at us both. I was worried he was onto us or at least suspecting something.

And I didn't want Chris to know, but I was falling for him. And we hadn't had the "what are we" conversation. We hadn't even discussed if this was something that was going to continue after our roadtrip was over and we were back in Boston, and because of that, I was dreading it coming to an end. Being on vacation with Chris felt like a fairytale that I never wanted to come to a close.

I went into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, but I saw Chris behind me in the mirror when I came up from splashing cold water on my face. He slid his arms around my waist, nestled his smile into my neck and whispered, "I can't wait to fuck you silly tonight." I felt his erection on my back as he did this. Despite having cum like five times in the last 24 hours, he had me needing more. As soon as we both heard footsteps coming closer to the bathroom, Chris released his grip on me and picked up his toothbrush. When Matt walked up on us in the bathroom, we were both nonchalantly brushing our teeth, standing a few feet apart. Matt stood between us and grabbed his own toothbrush. "Listen, I don't know what the fuck you guys are hiding, but I'm gonna find out," Matt said sternly. Chris and I both got wide-eyed and I nearly choked as I tried to spit into the sink. "What the fuck are you talking about?" I responded in a hushed voice, so Nick wouldn't hear. "I know you guys are up to no good," Matt responded. "The way you both stayed back while we got food last night, the way you guys were looking at each other while we were eating, texting back and forth all day, the way you just faked sick on our last night and both had an excuse to hang back again?" Fuck, well when he put it like that, it seemed like we were really bad at sneaking around. We both stayed silent. "See? Neither one of you are denying it. And I don't know what the hell you guys have cooked up, but just know I'm one step ahead of you, and I'm gonna figure out whatever prank it is you're trying to pull on me," Matt said pointing sternly at us both. I felt a sigh of relief come over both Chris and me. Oh, thank god. Matt's just being paranoid about us fucking with him. At least he doesn't know we're fucking with each other instead. "Oh my god Matt, you're so paranoid. Why would we prank you?" Chris said, a smile creeping across his face as he look at me in the mirror, feeding into Matt's suspicions. "See? I knew it! Watch yourselves. You guys think you're slick, but I see everything," Matt threatened. And he started brushing his teeth. I rolled my eyes and made my way to my bed that Chris had I had done unspeakable things to each other in earlier. I was relieved that Matt didn't immediately jump to the correct conclusion, which was that Chris and I were sneaking around and getting each other off any chance we could get, but he was picking up on the energy between Chris and me, which made me nervous. He knew we were being sneaky, and I also knew Matt was going to be paying extra attention to the way Chris and I were interacting. We had to be extra careful from here on out. But that wasn't exactly gonna start tonight, because I still hadn't gotten to fuck Chris, and it was our last night before we pack up and go back home. Who knows? Tonight might be the only chance. Once I got into my bed, I texted Chris, "Make extra sure Matt is asleep before you come over to my bed tonight."

A few hours later, both Nick and Matt were asleep. Once Chris came over to my bed, he kissed me deeply. He immediately shoved his hand down the front of my panties. "Mmm already wet, I see?" He quietly cooed. I blushed, but he couldn't tell in the dark room. I didn't say anything. I just started taking his clothes off, and I pushed him up against the wall behind the head of the bed, and I straddled him. "I need you," he whispered into my ear as he moved my panties to the side.

I slowly lowered myself onto him, and I savored every inch as it slowly filled me. We both softly exhaled once he was all way inside. It didn't take long for me to get used to him, it didn't take long before it was getting difficult to stay at a slow pace to keep from waking the brothers. "Mmm so tight," Chris purred into my ear, in which I responded by riding a little faster. He pulled up my t-shirt and started running his hands over my breasts, taking one of them into his mouth. I was overwhelmed by how incredible all the stimulation felt. I tried to stay quiet, but I found obscenities and Chris' name flowing from my lips while I pleasured myself on Chris' cock. "Shhh are you trying to get us caught?" Chris laughed at me, knowing I couldn't help it and slipped a hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. Sex with Chris was incredible, and having to be quiet almost made it harder to be. "Okay, darling, I need you to be quiet on your own okay? I need both hands for this," he smirked as he lifted me up by my hips and started thrusting.

At first, I was really good at holding back my whimpers, but it didn't take long before we were both approaching our climax, and our moans and panting definitely got out of hand. "Chris, what the fuck!?" We both heard Matt waking up and realizing what was going on, but it was too late. We were both teetering on an orgasm, and no matter how humiliated we both were, we couldn't stop.

I felt myself snap as Matt got up and turned on the light, and he definitely got a full view of me convulsing on Chris' cock as he finished me off with a few last strokes. Just then, Chris lifted me off of him, his dick coated in a layer of my fluids, and Matt couldn't help but to watch as Chris came into his hand while he rolled his eyes back and let out a loud "fuck," most likely a response to both the incredible pleasure coursing through his body and the fact that Matt had just witnessed the final seconds of it all. "Oh my god, I thought if I turned on the light, you sick fucks would stop!" Matt yelled. "Yeah, and I thought if you woke up while we were fucking, you'd pretend you didn't and go back to sleep, idiot." Chris said, covering himself with whatever piece of clothing was closest to him.

"What's happening?" Nick asked, poking his head over the couch and rubbing his eyes. I buried my face in my hands. "Oh, you know, they're just fucking in the bed next to me, that's all," Matt responded, rolling his eyes. "What the fuck? You two?" Nick pointed at us wide-eyed with his jaw on the floor. "Dude, I'm sorry, you don't understand how close I was when you turned on the light, I couldn't stop if I wanted to," Chris said, flustered, avoiding eye contact with everyone. "Yeah, trust me, I know. I was there," Matt gave his brother attitude. "Okay, let's not make this a whole thing. Can we just act like this never happened and go to bed?" Chris snapped back. "Yeah, but you're not sleeping in my bed with me," Matt snorted. "Wasn't planning on it, jackass. Now turn off the light," Chris told him. "Okay, but if you guys start getting it on again, I'm going downstairs and getting my own hotel room for the night," Matt responded. "Yeah, I'll be joining you Matt," Nick chimed in.

Matt turned off the light, everyone returned to their beds, but Chris stayed in mine. I had a million thoughts racing through my head. I was embarrassed, kind of turned on that we got caught like that, and ultimately confused as to why I had that reaction to the whole situation and what it meant going forward. I finally fell asleep in Chris' arms.

The next morning, when Chris and I woke up beside each other, we both smiled, and he kissed me. "Good morning, beautiful." My god, his morning voice was to die for. "Good morning," I smiled back. "I can't believe we got caught last night. Is it bad that I find it sort of hot?" I asked Chris.

"You guys make me sick," Matt said, turning over in his bed, apparently awake again. I blushed. "So what does this mean? You guys dating now?" Matt groggily asked, checking his phone. "Actually we hadn't gotten a chance to talk about it, Matt, but thanks for ruining the moment, because I was literally right about to ask," Chris said, turning to me, "do you wanna be my girlfriend?" I stared at him in silence for a few seconds. "You know, unless you were just fooling around and having fun, then I get that," Chris said, looking away and fidgeting with his hair. "No, I mean yes. I mean, no, it wasn't just fooling around to me, and yes, I do wanna be your girlfriend," I said, grinning. "Okay, good," Chris leaned in to kiss me. "Awh how cute," Matt said sarcastically, "now get the fuck up and help me pack." Chris leaned in and kissed me again, "I think I love you," he whispered, looking into my eyes. "I think I love you too."

[a-lexia11]

Ungrateful

Leah Williamson x reader

Warning: angst,Leah’s ACL

Words count: around 5k

Every morning began before dawn. I would slip out of bed quietly, so as not to disturb Leah, who slept on the bed with her leg propped up on a mound of pillows.

Her ACL tear in April had left her unable to walk, and the crutches leaned against the wall seemed like a cruel reminder of her helplessness.

I started my day by preparing breakfast—Leah’s favorite scrambled eggs with crispy bacon and freshly squeezed orange juice. I wanted everything to be perfect, hoping that my efforts might bring her a little comfort during this difficult time.

Leah had always been strong and driven, but seeing her struggle with something as basic as moving around was heart-wrenching. Despite my exhaustion from training, I did everything with a smile, determined to make her recovery as comfortable as possible.

The routine was a blur of laundry, cleaning, and cooking. Leah’s clothes seemed to accumulate in heaps, and each evening, after an intense training session, I would come home to find more mess—dirty dishes piled in the sink, crumbs scattered on the coffee table, and wrappers strewn across the floor. I would clean up, even though I was physically and mentally drained.

——

One evening, after another grueling training session, I walked into the kitchen to find Leah sitting at the table, tapping away on her phone.

The kitchen was a disaster—crumbs from her snack littered the counter, and empty food containers were haphazardly thrown aside.

“Hey, what’s for dinner?” Leah’s voice cut through the silence.

“Chicken stir-fry,” I replied, trying to keep my tone upbeat despite my fatigue.

Leah barely glanced up. “Make sure it’s not too spicy. You know how I don’t handle spice well.”

I forced a smile and started cooking. As I chopped vegetables, I glanced around at the mess Leah had left behind.

The crutches were lying in the middle of the floor, making it difficult to navigate around the room. I took a deep breath and focused on making the meal as perfect as possible.

When I finally brought the food to the table, Leah was still engrossed in her phone. “Finally,you took your time, I’m starving,” she said, barely looking up.

I put the plates down with a clatter, trying to mask my frustration. “I’m doing my best, Leah. I’ve been working hard too.”

Leah’s eyes flicked up, and she gave me an annoyed look. “Well, maybe if you weren’t so busy complaining, you’d actually be able to get things done faster.”

Her words cut deep. I was trying my best to support her, and it felt like all my efforts were being ignored. “I’m not complaining,” I said, struggling to keep my voice steady. “I’m just saying it’s been hard for me too.”

Leah’s irritation flared. “If you can’t handle it, maybe you should just leave.”

The words hit me like a physical blow. I felt my tears welling up, but I refused to let them show. “Maybe I will,” I said, my voice trembling with hurt and anger.

Without waiting for a response, I walked out of the room, slamming the door behind me.

I took refuge in the bathroom, the cold tiles offering no comfort as I sank to the floor. I turned on the shower, letting the hot water cascade down.

The steam enveloped me, and I let the tears fall freely. The bathroom, normally a sanctuary, became a place of silent suffering. The sound of the running water masked my sobs, allowing me to cry without Leah hearing.

My heart ached with the weight of feeling unappreciated and used, and I felt utterly alone despite my attempts to be there for her.

——

A few days later, Leah’s attitude showed no sign of improvement. One afternoon, as I was organizing the laundry, Leah called from the living room. “Can you get me that book from the shelf? I’m too tired to reach it.”

I was in the middle of sorting through a mountain of her clothes, but I walked over to the bookshelf and retrieved the book. When I handed it to Leah, she barely acknowledged me. “Finally,” she muttered.

That evening, as I was cooking dinner, Leah’s frustration with her recovery seemed to be taking a toll on her mood. I found her snapping at me again. “Why does this food always seem so bland?” she complained, poking at her plate with a fork.

I tried to ignore the sting of her words. “I followed the recipe, and that’s what you like but maybe your taste buds are just off because of the medication you taking for the pain”

Leah rolled her eyes. “Or maybe you just don’t know how to cook properly.”

I could feel the frustration bubbling up inside me, but I kept my composure. “I’ll try to make something else.”

The next day, Leah’s demands escalated. I came home to find the apartment in disarray. The crutches were strewn across the hallway, and the living room was cluttered with Leah’s belongings. I set to work cleaning up, but Leah’s voice interrupted me.

“Can you fix the TV? The remote isn’t working, and I can’t watch anything.”

I sighed, setting aside the cleaning to troubleshoot the issue. It turned out to be a simple problem with the batteries, but Leah’s impatient tone made it feel like a monumental task. “It’s fixed now,” I said, handing her the remote with a forced smile.

“Finally,” Leah replied, barely looking up from the screen. “I was getting so bored.”

As days went by, the emotional toll of Leah’s ungratefulness became increasingly apparent.

One evening, after I had cooked dinner, Leah complained again. “I don’t understand why we’re always eating the same things. Can’t you make something different for once?”

My heart sank. I had tried to make meals that suited her taste and dietary needs, but it felt like nothing was ever good enough.It’s always the same… always complaining about food.

——

One night, Leah’s frustration with her recovery came to a head once again. We were sitting in the living room, and I was trying to relax after a long day. Leah, however, was in a foul mood. She snapped at me over something trivial—my supposed failure to fold her blankets properly.

“This is so sloppy,” she said, throwing the blanket aside. “Can’t you do anything right?”

That was the breaking point. I stood up, my hands trembling with anger. “You know what, Leah? I’m doing everything I can for you. I cook your meals, clean up after you, and try to make things as comfortable as possible. And all I get in return is criticism. I’m not your servant. I’m your girlfriend.”

Leah looked shocked. “You think I’m not grateful? I’m just tired of being stuck here. It’s frustrating!”

“Well, guess what? I’m tired too,” I shot back, tears of frustration blurring my vision. “I’m tired of feeling like my efforts don’t matter. I’m tired of being constantly berated. I’m doing everything I can, but it’s never enough for you!”

Leah’s face flushed with frustration. “It’s not about you not doing enough! It’s about me being stuck here and feeling helpless. I’m taking it out on you because I don’t know how to handle it!”

“Then maybe you should try expressing your feelings differently,” I snapped. “Instead of making me feel like I’m failing you, maybe you should appreciate what I’m doing. I’m doing my best!”

Leah stood up, her voice rising. “You don’t get it! You have no idea what it’s like to be so dependent on someone else, to feel like you’re losing your independence. I’m frustrated, and I’m taking it out on you because you’re the only one here!”

“And I’m supposed to just take it?” I shouted back. “I’m not a punching bag! I’m trying to help, and it’s hurting me to feel like I’m not appreciated!”

The argument left us both drained, standing in the middle of the living room, our faces flushed with anger and hurt. Leah’s eyes were filled with tears, and my heart was pounding with the weight of our confrontation.

I stormed out of the room, needing space to collect my thoughts. Leah slumped onto the couch, her face buried in her hands, and the silence that followed was heavy with unspoken pain.

——

In the following days, Leah seemed to realize the gravity of her actions. One evening, she made a concerted effort to mend things. She spent the entire day planning a surprise for me.

I came home to find the living room transformed into a romantic setting—candles flickering softly, a table set with care, and gentle music playing in the background. Leah, looking nervous but determined, had prepared dinner herself.

When I walked in, I was taken aback. Leah greeted me with a tentative smile. “Hey,” she said softly. “I wanted to apologize for everything. I know I’ve been ungrateful and difficult. I’ve been thinking a lot about what you’ve done for me, and I’m really sorry.”

I sat down at the table, touched by the effort she had put into this gesture. The meal wasn’t perfect—there were a few burned edges and unevenly cooked parts—but the sentiment was clear. Leah had tried, and that meant more to me than any grand gesture.

As we ate, the silence was thick with unspoken words. Finally, Leah broke it. “I’ve been reflecting on how I’ve treated you. I want to be better. I want to show you how much I appreciate you. You’ve been my rock through all of this, and I’ve taken that for granted”.”

My eyes filled with tears, not just from the pain but from the relief of hearing Leah’s sincere apology.

“Thank you, Leah. It’s been hard for me to feel like my efforts aren’t valued. I just want us to be able to support each other, not tear each other down.”

Leah reached across the table, her hand finding mine. “I promise to do better. I want to be the girlfriend you deserve, not someone who just takes from you.”

The sincerity in Leah’s eyes and her commitment to change melted some of the ice that had formed around my heart.

We spent the rest of the evening talking about our feelings, our hopes, and how we could improve our relationship. It was a difficult conversation, but it was necessary.

Leah made a conscious effort to be more considerate and appreciative in the days that followed. She started taking on small tasks within her limited mobility and expressed gratitude for everything I did.

Though there were still moments of tension and frustration, we were learning how to communicate better and support each other more effectively.

I knew that the road to healing wouldn’t be smooth, and there would be setbacks. But for the first time in a long while, I felt hopeful.

Leah’s effort to make amends showed that she was committed to changing our dynamic. And for me, that was the first step toward rebuilding the trust and love that had been strained.

FIN

[milksuu]

Sorry, Mom. I'm The New Cleaning Lady For Heartsteel

Pairings: various!Heartsteel x f!reader

Status: on-going (Cross posted on AO3)

Content/Warnings: 18+ content, explicit themes, suggestive language

Summary: Identity theft was a crime—that was obvious. But when it meant paying off the bills for basically existing and your mother’s hospital expenses, committing a felony didn’t seem like a bad thing. It was like that one quote, from that one band, with that one hit song: “Two sides to a story but they never tell me side.”

Or…something like that. Wait, what was their name again? Heartsteel? Sounds like a dating sim game.

[Reader takes the identity of her mother, who had been hired to be the new cleaning lady for an up and coming boy band named ‘Heartsteel’. Obviously, there’s no way they would ever find out. But that was a joke. Because they’re definitely finding out: one by one.]

“You…brought your own cleaning supplies?”

“You always need to be prepared, young man,” you replied, adjusting your duck-yellow cleaning gloves. They squeeked and flopped comically around your hand and fingers. 

“Ma’am, you do understand today is solely the house tour.” The man folded his arms neatly against his chest, white brow raised. “In order to rely on you fully, you’ll need to be familiar with the estate first. I thought we discussed this beforehand. That and…we have cleaning supplies to provide you with here.”

You paused at the grand modern entrance. You lifted your bucket full of sponges, brushes, and cleaning spray from the dollar store. 'Buy-one-get-one' on all cleaning supplies was the grand deal of the day. How could you pass a penny-pinching bargain? Swallowing your shame, you settled the cheap items on the pristine granite floors. 

“Oh, is that so? Must’ve slipped my mind. Age will do that to you.” You forced a chuckle, adjusting your sterile mask across your youthful face. “That and, I have such a passion for cleaning. I can't help myself. I see the inside of a house, and I just have to clean it. I’m sure you could understand that.”

“I don’t believe I could,” your employer said dryly. “Anyway, if you will, follow me.”

You nodded and shuffled along accordingly. As you stared into the back of his immaculately pressed business attire, a new-found horror struck through you: you had no clue what your employer’s name was. Frantically, you scavenged your pockets. From it, you pulled out a business card, holding it so close to your face you smelled the tinge of clean cologne.

YONE

RIOT RECORDS

DJ / PRODUCER

 EMAIL: yone123@riotstudios.com

TELEPHONE:  XXX-XXX-XXXX

“The bottom floor consists of all of the amenities; gym, entertainment area, recording studio and so on.” Yone stated as he stepped into the open-kitchen plan. When he regarded you again, you awkwardly plunged the card back into your pants pocket. “The boys have their own scheduled chores every week. They’re expected to do it without you having to help them. I’m trying to keep them humble, but easier said than done. Refer to the chore calendar on the fridge. And try not to interfere with it too much.”

“Okay—who switched my protein powder with flour?” Behind an opened cabinet, a heavy-muscled stacked man growled. “Guys. Seriously. This stuff’s expensive. Where’d it go?” When he poured the contents out into the trash can, he plucked out a note from the bottom of the canister. The small print read:

‘Protein powder tastes like dog food.’’

The weight of realization punched him square between the eyes. He threw open the pantry, where dog kibble was stored in a tub at the bottom marked ‘Ernest’. Sett pulled open the container, and sure enough, found his  protein powder and scooper. There was no mistaking his favorite smell of cinnamon crunch isolate, now mixed with the scent of dry-bacon kibble. Another note pasted the inside lid:

‘Woof–Woof ฅ՞•ﻌ•՞ฅ’

“A–phe–li–os,” the name gritted between his canines. His ears flattened against his untamed hair, and crumpled the note to dust in his palm. “Oh–Ho. Mess with me all you want; but never mess with my gains. I’m gonna’ prank him back so hard tonight, he’s gonna’ be begging me to stop.” 

“Sett,” Yone coughed, grabbing the Vistayan's attention. “We have a guest today. Our new cleaning lady.”

“Oh, sorry about that.” Sett wiped his powdered hand against his sleeveless shirt. He reached and took your rubber glove with a squelch. “Hey, how’s it goin’, Ma’am. The name’s Sett.” 

You swallowed hard, hoping your glove would remain securely covering your hand. You feared if he pulled back, he would reveal a hand that wasn't so wrinkled for someone supposedly in their late-fifties. And that was according to your mother’s age printed on her driver’s license. Thankfully, you could tell he restrained himself to a delicate shake.

“Would talk more but gotta hit the gym. Nice meetin’ yah though,'' Sett started away, and called back over his shoulder. “Mom, can you take care of Phel for me? I dunno' where he hid the dog food for Ernest.”

Yone exhaled a silent sigh, and part of you felt pity for your employer. He seemed like a parent with a tag-team of overbearing children running around the house. Being a single parent was difficult; you knew this first hand from your own up-bringing. It made you grateful for your mother’s patience and attention. It was the reason you were here in the first place. 

“Let’s continue with the tour upstairs,” Yone said, motioning you to a loft-style staircase. “The second floor consists of all the bedrooms and laundry room. At the end of the hall is my room. As it stands, it’s completely off limits to everyone, including yourself.” He turned a sharp chin in your direction, “Am I understood?”

You gulped and pressed your shoulders straight. “Of course.”

“Mommy, help me!” A bed of green hair bounced to Yone’s side, tugging at his tailored suit. “Kayn’s bullying me again. But I didn’t do anything wrong, I swear.”

“You’re such a crappy liar.” The presumed assailant, Kayn, stomped out of the hallway bathroom. Magenta hair stuck to his furrowing brows. With just a towel wrapped around his steaming waist, his abdominal muscles tensed, pointing aggressively at his target. “I was trying to shower in peace, until bubblegum pop princess over here came barging in trying to take selfies of himself. Did you know people usually shower naked? I’d like my junk not to be posted on social media, unless I’m the one doing it. For cash.” 

“It’s not my fault you’re always going over your shower limit. News flash: we each only get fifteen-minutes. But you’re always breaking the rules! You know I take my selfies at the same time, at the same place, every single day. So how about you do us all a favor, and get some better time management?”

Kayn raised a vein popping fist into the air. “How about I get you a better face instead?"

Ezreal cried fake sparkling tears, cowering further behind their producer.

“Enough. The both of you,” Yone tightened around his words like a leash, restraining the quarreling pair. “For once, I’d like for you two to at least pretend you get along in front of others.” 

The two whined and grumbled under their breaths till they fell to a silent agreement. But the peace treaty wasn’t upheld for long. You saw a zap of yellow from the corner of your eye. The image was so fast, you thought you must’ve imagined it—Nope. You definitely saw something. Kayn’s towel knot popped loose. And it wasn’t caused by an event of divine intervention.

The towel billowed towards the ground. And the world felt as if it was turning in slow motion, like one of those car chase movies with excessive explosions. Except, the only explosion here would be your very own heart.

Sure, you took an anatomy class here and there. In high school, you remembered the penis joke’s and games, and they never flustered you. Heck, not even when your friends set your desktop screen to a .gif of dicks spinning in circles—you found that hilarious. And when anatomy classes began in college, they were all very clinical, rudimentary, and otherwise a snooze fest. 

But seeing one in real life when you’ve never had a boyfriend or a one night stand, was truly groundbreaking. Earth shattering, even.

Penis (en)counter: 1

While you were stuck in your prison of naïve embarrassment, Ezreal laughed and pulled out his cell phone, camera light shuttering a mile a minute. 

“You little shi—!” Time sped forward again. With fast reflexes of his own, Kayn whipped the towel and knot back in place. “That’s it. You’re dead.” 

“Uh–Oh. Time to run again,” Ezreal quipped, zooming off down the stairs.

With all bark and full bite, Kayn vanished like a cloud of smoke in pursuit. You coughed against the smog, while Yone merely swatted his hand back and forth, dissipating the gray wisps.

“You’ll have to excuse them,” he commented. “They share the same room, but have vastly different personalities. I arranged most of them together, thinking it’d help them understand each other on a deeper level. And ultimately, help them perform better together in the studio and on stage. My efforts are…yet to be determined.”

“That’s alright. Can’t be easy for young men their age to share anything. Especially with them being full of energy, testosterone, and other things. O-Oh, to be young once more…ah-ha…” you laughed nervously. Oh, God. What the heck were you saying? Honestly, you had to give pardon to yourself. You were still trying to recover from seeing your first penis up close and personal.

The image would be forever burned in your mind.

You were pulled from your self-conscious thoughts. Down the hall, a pair of shadowed eyes peeked through a sliver of door and frame. When your gaze locked together, the other pair of eyes shifted shyly from side to side. As if a poltergeist existed within the room, the visage faded back into the uncanny crack of darkness. The door creaked closed, with an audible click and lock.

Yone pursued straight to the door, and you stood a few paces back. If there was any chance that a ghost was inside living rent-free, you wouldn't be the first it possessed. You weren't a certified Ghostbuster.

But you also weren't a certified Dustbuster, either. No one will know, know one will know, you chanted the comforting hymn. 

“Aphelios. Open the door. I know you’re in there. I can see the computer light flashing,” Yone stated, rattling the door knob. “Where’s the kibble for the dog? Sett told me you have it somewhere.”

There was a beat in the air. From behind the door, you heard feet pacing back and forth, and the sounds of finger taps against a phone screen. Yone’s phone pinged with an alert. He pulled it out, and opened his text messages.

‘I can’t open the door all the way. I set the bucket of dog food to fall on Sett’s head when he comes in. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ’

“For the love of…no more pranks today." Yone pinched the bridge of his nose with a groan. "But I doubt you could even manage that. Whatever trap you’ve ensembled, take it down—now. And put the dog’s food back in the pantry. Unless you want to donate a cut of your earnings every month to Ernest’s pet store bill.”

Another pause, followed by begrudging phone taps. 

‘Fine, m O T h E r…(¬_¬")’

“That might take him a few. Depending how intricate the set up was. I would be surprised if the only thing involved in this scheme was just the dog food.” Yone motioned you back down the stairs. “Last thing to see is the outdoor space.”

Continuing with the tour, you passed through the lower floor, stepping down a hallway decorated with awards and magazine clippings. From commercial modeling gigs to sold out venues, your eyes glistened at the polished look the group was slowly cultivating. Which you had to admit, completely contradicted their personal lives.

When you reached a sliding glass door that stretched from floor to ceiling, you stepped out onto a landscaped deck. Lush modern garden trims, a shaded outdoor lounge, and smooth sandstone pavement decorated the space. At the backend, an infinity pool rested in pristine stillness. 

At the head of the pool, a person of sculpted bronze physique posed in swimwear on a lounge chair. When you approached along with your chaperone, he picked up his tropical drink, and tilted it in a cheering gesture.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Mama gracing me with his presence. And look's like someone else is with him, too.” The man basking in the sun's rays and oil slicked, shucked his sunglasses onto his dread locks. “Let me guess. This must be the new cleaning lady you hired to pick up after our mess.”

“To a certain degree,” Yone replied. “But not all of the mess, K’Sante. Out of everyone, you should know better.”

“I only joke, Mama.” He grinned smoothly, taking a sip of his frozen alcoholic refresher. “Say, have you seen Sett? I told him to come join me for a tan by the pool. If he wants his muscles to truly pop, he needs to use some oil and not be allergic to the sun. The man is whiter than the sky is bright today.”

As he laughed to himself, Ernest left his chew toy at the far side of the pool, and came to sniff your shoes. With a smile, you slipped a very small piece of your long sleeve up, allowing him to sniff at your skin. The dog lapped his tongue around his slobbering chops, barking delightedly and pawing for you to pet him. You were more than happy to oblige.

These gloves came in handy after all, you thought pleasantly as globs of saliva fell in heaps over your fingers.

“What’s this? Ernest taking a liking to the cleaning lady already,” K’Sante mused at the sight. “Barely warmed up to us when we first met. We won’t mention the illegal trespassing but, call me impressed.” 

With a wink, he flicked his sunglasses back down to the bridge of his nose. “That or he has a ‘ting for older women. Can’t say I blame ‘em. An experienced woman has a certain power that’ll make any grown man cry. And from my own experience, it is never for mercy.”

Oh, boy. You couldn’t imagine your mother being interested in the cougar life-style. Not that you would approve of it. And you were certain your father would descend from the heavens and deliver the backhand of God to any young man who dared otherwise.

Before Yone could address the unsavory statement, Ezreal burst through the backyard sliding doors. Still possessed with laughter, he hopped and skipped over pool chairs and tables. The merriment stopped short when Kayn caught up to the cheeky idol, snatching his wrist which held the phone. From the staggering halt, the phone slipped from Ezreal’s hold, somersaulting towards the pool. 

“M-My phone!” Ezreal paled at the thought of losing thousands of stored photos of himself—Oh, and the blackmail photos he was going to use against Kayn, too. 

Yanking his wrist free, Ezreal pursued the device. But Ernest’s rubber hotdog toy squealed beneath him, forcing him off balance. Kayn latched an arm around Ezreal's slim waist, and pressed him safely against his bare chest.

He huffed against Ezreal's ear. “You can’t swim, you idiot. Remember? Just let it go.” 

Ernest barked at the surmounting commotion. Being the valiant guard dog with the perfect pedigree, he bounded on his thick paws to catch Kayn by the towel, with all the intent to keep them both from falling in. What a good boy! Unfortunately for Kayn, Ernest bit a bit more than he could chew.

Kayn’s voice bass boosted ten-octaves lower. “MY DAMN ASS!”

W-Whose voice was that? Was that even the same person? The thought rattled through you.

A chunk of Kayn's soft meat condensed in the jaws of a furry devil. A shock travelled up the nerves of his spine, into the the muscle fibers of his arm, shoving Ezreal forward. Ezreal flailed his hands in the air, desperate to find some semblance of balance—with no luck, at all. Fumbling on his tip-toes, Ezreal plummeted into the pool with a splash. Kayn stumbled from the after-shock of his spirit being bitten straight through his buttcheeks. His feet met the cursed rubber squeaker, sending him following suit into the pool. Except, the towel had its own plans. It decided to stay behind and not get involved.

Penis (en)counter: 2

“I heard some commotion, fellas. What’s goin’ on?” Sett stepped out from the sliding doors. He caught witness of Ezreal’s face treading water, gasping for bouts of air. Sett’s muscles popped at the sight, barreling towards the scene. “Don’t worry, Ez. I’m coming for yah, buddy!”

Sett launched himself into the air, preparing the most athletic Olympic dive ever conceived.

Kayn inhaled sharply as he broke through the water's surface tension. Recuperating his breaths, he slicked his wet hair back from his face. Looking down at the waters crystal reflection, an odd shadow grew in size around him. And according to the forecast earlier; there was no chance in Hell of clouds or rain. Lifting his nose to the darkening sky, he blanched in sheer horror. A body, massive enough to eclipse the sun, hurled down like a meteor descending to Earth.

What day was it today, Doomsday? He must've forgot; Kayn never bothered to look at calendar's, anyway.  

Back to the painful mistress that was his life; a weak, painful moan escaped him. “You can’t be serious. This isn’t the cool death I deserve—”

Those were Kayn’s final words. A wave rivaling a tsunami consumed him, a random pizza chair float, and the immediate surrounding pool area. Standing in the designated splash zone, pool water soaked your soles, leached into your socks, and dampened your pants to the knees. From K’Sante’s spot, a shot of chlorine or two spiked his drink. He snatched his sunglasses off and shouted the words; “This was the last bit of banana daiquiri mix, you aboas! Now I have to go down to the liquor store and hope they sell it frozen already.”

Yone, with all the grace anyone could hope to be blessed with, merely side-stepped away. A single speck landed on his polished shoes. He narrowed his steely eyes, flicking away the insignificant drop.

You caught something flashing on the second floor of the estate. Looking up, you shielded your eyes from the glaring sun. From one of the windows, you spotted someone holding up a sign. You assumed it was Aphelios. The poster read:

‘4/10 Ezreal. 6/10 Kayn. 10/10 Sett.’

With a dramatic burst through the water, Sett hurled Ezreal over his massive shoulder, and walked out of the pool. Placing Ezreal onto his soaking back, he coughed and gagged against the awful taste of treated water.

He smiled at his new-found savior. “Thanks, Sett. I’m fine, but what about Kayn…”

The group shifted their attention over the silent, lapping water. After a bubble or two, the sight of Kayn’s bare bottom surfaced to the top. Floating like a wet and rounded land-mass, with the additional landmark of a pink dog-bite. 

“Kayn! Hang in there, pal!” Sett launched himself once more into the water, creating another wave of soaking magnitude.

Although the drink had already been spoiled, K’Sante reflexively covered the top of his daiquiri glass. “For God’s sake, Sett. Take your time. It’s not like you’re saving the life of an innocent man.”

As chaos continued to ensue around the gang, Yone placed himself at your side. With a shake of his head, he crossed his arms, and sent a ghost of a smile your way.

“Welcome to Heartsteel,” he said. “Your first day starts tomorrow.” 

Looks like your identity was safe…for now, at least.

an: thanks for reading! the rest of the this story will most likely just be on my AO3. You can find me @ milksuu. comments and suggestions always welcomed. <3

[kcrossvine-art]

haiiii dungeon delvers! This is a quick one, gratefully both the materials and the dish-type are very close to their real life inspiration :D

As we speak, my favorite catgirl bestfolk is getting introduced to the anime and you haven no idea how much self control its taken to not immediately jump forward to be in sync with her, but theres SO many good recipes before we get there!!!

We will be making a Mandrake and Basilisk Omelet today!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes into a Mandrake and Basilisk Omelet?” YOU MIGHT ASKIts made from the egg of a basilisk, which isnt a large chicken egg but instead a large snake egg. Oblong shape, soft leather texture, and no eggwhites just yolk.

A large daikon

½ lbs fatty bacon

Shallots

Garlic

Chicken eggs

Salt

Pepper

Arugula (for garnishing)

OPTIONAL; ketchup/hot sauce :)

You could try cooking this using actual snake eggs, but theyre hard to come by and reportedly quite bland compared to chicken eggs. I tried getting my hands on an ostrich egg for the pizzaz of it all. The zoo lady was kind in her dismissal.

AND, “what does a Mandrake and Basilisk Omelet taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASKOmelettes are standard fair but here we cook them like a french omelette and wrap it up like a burrito at the end.

Wetter eggs than im used to ( <- american)

Daikon and bacon r very tasty together

They end up having the same texture almost

Intensely savory. Heavy on the tummy

Chopped green onions would bring more levity to the filling

Ketchup pairs well

(but i prefer medium hot sauce)

Dark coffee pairs well

The acidity of the above 3 is what makes them work with this nutrient Dense dish

. In the show, decapitated mandrakes are more bitter than mandrakes left 'whole'. If you want that difference, using sweet/sour sauce on some of the daikon while it cooks will make the non-sauced daikon seem bitter by comparison. . Maybe ferment daikon too? . Adding a small amount of water with the bacon transfers the heat evenly, a small amount as to cook off before the fat/grease renders. Could also try cooking in the oven.

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"Consisting of a fluffy Basilisk egg omelet filled with minced Basilisk bacon and mandrake.If the mandrake used was killed with its 'head' still attached, it will be less bitter and more mellow" This dish is important as it marks the beginning of Senshi and Marcilles bonding, and the lead-up gives us our first glance into the school Falin and Marcille met at. Objectively the recipe is basic but it was challenging to write out.

Omelette making is muscle-memory, so having to learn the french variation and slow down felt like trying to ride a bike side-saddled.

It took about an hour and a half from laying out the ingredients, to eating the finished thing. I had to take a break in the middle of cutting veggies as my wrists are flaring up, so you could probably go faster unimpeded.

What would you rate this recipe out of 10?(with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Did you love it, did you hate it? What're your thoughts on what I could do different, and what would you have done instead?

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

1 large daikon, chopped

½ lbs fatty bacon, chopped

2 shallots

3 cloves of garlic

3 Eggs

Salt

Pepper

Some arugula (for garnishing)

OPTIONAL; ketchup/hot sauce :)

Method:

Chop your bacon into roughly ½ inch squares. Cut off the ends of your daikon and cube the rest. Thinly dice your shallots and crush your garlic cloves.

Bring a cast iron skillet to medium-high heat. Once at temp, carefully add your chopped bacon to the pan with a very small amount of water.

Add your chopped bacon and stir-fry until almost cooked.

Add your shallots and garlic. Cook for about a minute or until the shallots have softened.

Transfer the bacon, shallot, and garlic mix to a bowl. Set aside. Lower the cast iron skillet to medium heat.

Place your daikon cubes in the cast iron skillet, you should still have enough bacon grease. Add salt and cook until lightly browned on each side.

Add roughly 1 tablespoon of water. Lower heat and cover. Simmer for 2 minutes.

Once your daikon are softened, transfer to same bowl containing your bacon, shallots, and garlic.

Crack your eggs into a seperate bowl and whisk for 2 minutes until 'frothy' with no egg whites visible.

Bring the cast iron skillet back up to medium heat. There might not be enough bacon grease left, so feel free to add butter! If the butter browns you've gone too hot.

Pour your eggs into the skillet. Use a spatula to spread the eggs, scraping down the sides of the pan. Sprinkle salt and pepper in, to taste.

Once your eggs are mostly solid, pour the bacon, shallot, garlic, and daikon filling into the center. If it starts to separate- stop touching and let it rest. Gently fold the edges of the omelette overtop the filling.

Lay a few pieces of arugula on a plate, and flip your omelette onto it :) enjoy!