#bc I’m supposed to be the one to succeed so you wouldn’t have to worry about your mistakes

[shinjaeha]

ipytm ep 3 (thoughts + spoilers)

this is going to be a tough post for me to do bc honestly...this ep just left me feeling so run down. i know that the cast and crew have always strived for realism and authenticity with this series, but this one was just a lot to take in :/ my thoughts are gonna be even more all over the place than usual but idec at this point. having to rewatch this ep again is really fucking hard (even harder than itsay ep 4 bc even though that makes my heart ache, i still feel some sense of satisfaction from the development we get...this just leaves me feeling defeated in every way).

you know the drill: not an analysis, just me ranting as usual bc free therapy (and boy do i need it after this one)!! i had so many feelings watching this ep (esp towards teh but what’s new), so here goes.

we begin with the drama students rehearsing for jai’s new play, and the introduction of the plum wine which will be the recurring motif in this whole ep. the use of the plum wine in this also kind of reminds me of how teh initially disliked coconuts until he started falling in love with oh-aew and started to like them instead...i’m guessing that’s the parallel they’re trying to draw with the plum wine comparison in this.

teh’s having a hard time getting into character (which we already know from last ep was always going to be one of the toughest challenges for him as an actor). his character in the play is supposed to have a sex scene, but he’s struggling with this bc he can’t put himself in his character (akin’s) shoes, so jai ends rehearsals early.

jai gives them all logbooks which he basically wants them to treat as diaries where they’ll write everything they feel/learn and hand it back to him (he’ll be the only one reading them). ngl this already had me feeling kind of yikes (esp now as i rewatch this knowing how everything went down) since jai already has inside knowledge about teh’s feelings on his relationship with oh-aew which he can take advantage of :/ more on that later though...

it’s sad to me that so much time has passed since teh’s argument with khim and he's STILL avoiding her. khim was someone that he respected immensely (and was such a great mentor for him) so it just sucks to see that their relationship has deteriorated so much since the first two eps. teh might have had his reconciliation moment with oh-aew last ep, but there’s still a lot that he’s not ready or willing to address yet.

i understand that teh’s just encouraging jai about his work when he tells him to stop having others comment on it, but at the same time, i disagree with him bc i think it IS important to get other peoples’ opinion about your work. how else will you ever be able to see things from other perspectives if you don’t?

anyway, teh tells jai he’s seeing a play, and jai asks teh if he’s bringing oh-aew...the look on teh’s face is telling enough that things aren’t going great between them (at least on his end). this brings us to the logbook scene, where teh’s homework for the day is to write about the similarities and differences between himself and his character in the play. this gets teh to reflect on how he feels his relationship with oh-aew is changing, or specifically, how oh-aew seems to be changing so much that teh feels like he’s becoming someone else entirely...and does that mean that he still loves him the same?

i feel like this is a fairly common issue with people that have been in a relationship for a while (and this is their third year together now), so i understand how teh might start having doubts. it’s nothing that oh-aew’s done, it’s just that sometimes all these small changes can keep mounting up to the point that they feel much bigger than they actually are. oh-aew’s really just doing what everyone else does, which is grow and change as they get older, but teh’s still stuck in the past trying to hold onto what they used to have instead of evolving with oh-aew. the way teh picks at all these little changes of oh-aew does make me think that he’s self-sabotaging himself. he’s just so afraid and insecure that oh-aew will change so much he leaves him, that he has to nitpick at reasons why oh-aew’s the one that’s growing away from him (though when we watch the whole ep we know that that’s not the case at all). it’s like a ‘if i push him away first, then he won’t push me away’ sort of self-defence mechanism. either way, teh’s a constant overthinker...and he’s always been his own biggest enemy since the start, so it makes perfect sense to me that he would do this to himself here too.

i know that they’ve been together for years at this point, so things are not quite as exciting as they used to be, but it hurts to see oh-aew be so happy about getting an A for his class, and teh be so unenthused about it. oh-aew has to basically beg teh to give him attention and praise. remember when teh used to get so worried when oh-aew did badly in chinese class...and now it’s like whatever to him just bc he’s not tutoring him/they’re not in the same major anymore :((( i know it’s prob both bc teh’s still hurting that oh-aew transferred majors, and from seeing oh-aew succeed while he feels like he’s failing, but still...

also, not inviting him to see the play with him bc he thought oh-aew wouldn’t be interested/oh-aew kept falling asleep whenever they saw plays together ;;; i get the reasoning from both povs, but it still is nice to be asked :(

so one thing i have to say about the progression of their relationship here is that i just feel this huge disconnect from last ep and this ep?? i know it’s bc of the time skip (since it’s a year later basically), but to go from the end of ep 2, where they’re promising to love each other forever, and then to teh feeling disillusioned/as though he’s falling out of love with oh-aew basically right after that?? it’s so jarring. i feel like we lose so much with these time skips bc the transition from ep 2 to ep 3 is never really shown, so there’s this lack of flow there. like we’ve skipped a step entirely and something’s missing. this is the disadvantage of only focussing on one year per ep since there’s not enough time to explore as much character and relationship development when we’re only seeing an hour long snippet of an entire year. it just makes things feel superficial since so much of what we should be seeing is missing...and we basically have to fill in all the gaps ourselves.

okay, back to oh-aew ranting to his friends about how he feels like his relationship with teh is fading away bc they don’t have the same interests anymore, but also wondering if that’s just normal for long-term relationships. bless that boy that came to ask oh-aew for his ig :’) at least he knows that he’s wanted and has options, even if he obv turns him down bc of teh (for now).

plug and mangpong are dating!!!!!!! and mangpong does a horrible job of trying to hide it 😂 sidenote, but i love the way pp delivers lines sometimes (like the “just shocked”), he’s so cute. plug and mangpong’s legs touching...and the wave of nostalgia that came over me (and oh-aew) during that ;;; oh-aew seeing their blossoming relationship would make him reminisce back to his own experience of falling in love with teh...when everything was still so fluttery and new. so when teh texts him about using his car to help jai move, he looks happy. like he wants to rekindle those feelings again too.

that being said, it’s kind of sad to me how even jai shows more interest in oh-aew’s major than teh (when he asks him for his opinion on how to get people interested in his play). oh-aew’s got some good ideas and is more than willing to help (esp since he wants to connect and find a common interest with teh again). also, just bc oh-aew doesn’t want to be an actor anymore doesn’t mean that he’s completely uninterested in it. god, watching this part again hurts bc oh-aew looks so happy and optimistic. he worked so hard to help teh (and jai) only for them to betray him like that. it made me mad originally, but now it just breaks my heart :(

jai’s running acting classes again for his play, and this time it’s a workshop to help them tap into their feelings. it’s like an intimacy exercise where they give one another consent to touch certain body parts. teh is still struggling a lot with this. i think teh craves intimacy, but as he doesn’t feel that connection in his personal life to oh-aew anymore, so it’s difficult for him to draw on his experiences. he can’t even remember the first time he had sex with oh-aew properly anymore. as usual, teh’s too in his own head to just go with the flow and ~feel things (which isn’t new since teh’s had problems with this since itsay), but it’s def something that he’ll need to learn how to do if he wants to become an actor. he’s trying, but the fact that he can’t get to that place makes him feel even more insecure than ever that he might never be able to get there. imo one of the reasons teh works so hard, and is as driven and ambitious as he is, is that he’s afraid that he’ll never be good enough. he puts so much pressure on himself, and the issue with that is that he’ll never be able to live up to his expectations that way.

teh is also very much alone now. oh-aew has his group of friends to talk to about his relationship with teh, but teh just has jai at this point. he’s pushed khim away...and he and oh-aew aren’t communicating effectively (which is also why they’re on SUCH different wavelengths in terms of where their relationship is at), so there’s literally only jai for him to talk to about all his relationship issues. and to me at least, jai seems to have ulterior motives (particularly when you consider that the subject matter of his play is pretty much the same thing that teh’s going through rn). it’s times like this when i do feel kind of bad for teh, but then again, he brought this upon himself the way that he almost always does...and it leaves me frustrated instead.

jai kissing his professor though...also their conversation?? i have QUESTIONS...

that whole interaction with teh when jai catches him spying on him and the professor was SO awkward. idk what it is about teh but i have never encountered a character that has given me as much secondhand embarrassment as he does. when he starts touching the bars and avoiding eye contact i just- why, teh why?????

moving on, i’m thinking there’s prob more to that scene that we don’t know about bc jai’s shifty like that...but it’s purpose is also to shift teh’s perception of jai. before this, he pretty much just saw jai as his friend and mentor, but seeing him kiss someone else pushes him to think of jai in another less platonic light. like the first spark of attraction.

the both of them go to see the mime show (babymime), and i know that the point of this is so teh can learn to just feel and let go the way that the mimes in this play do, but idk it’s just kind of funny to me the contrast between the last scene and this one. 

the leg touching scene again but this time with teh and jai...thanks, i hate it :/// 

teh’s already feeling like he and oh-aew’s interests are making them drift apart, so by connecting with jai, it’s that initial feeling of attraction that he used to feel with oh-aew all those years ago. jai is that cool senior that he respects...he’s goal-oriented and has so much in common with him (in a way that he feels that oh-aew doesn’t anymore), so it doesn’t altogether surprise me that teh latches onto jai in this way. esp when all their conversations revolve around what teh’s most passionate about, and what dreams they’re striving towards in the future.

it doesn’t surprise me bc teh’s affections shifted in a similar way from tarn to oh-aew when he was first starting to realise his feelings for oh-aew too (though at least he and tarn were never officially dating during that time...)

there’s a genuineness to the way teh praises and encourages jai that isn’t there when he’s doing the same to oh-aew :( and that coupled with teh lying to oh-aew about him having dinner with jai while oh-aew is at home, completely oblivious, painstakingly photoshopping his boyfriend’s face on the poster of the play TO HELP TEH instead of doing his own uni work, makes me so fucking upset for oh-aew.

it’s interesting to see how different their personalities are even when it comes to something as simple as the way they read their texts. oh-aew is so ready to accept whatever teh tells him at face value, but teh overthinks everything to the point where he jumps to a certain conclusion in his head about it instead.

but yeah, it’s just really tough to see oh-aew try so hard for teh, only to see teh do nothing back for oh-aew in return. there’s only so much one side can give. it’s the absolute lack of effort on teh’s part to even try to make things work with oh-aew that is the most frustrating thing of all. oh-aew is carrying their entire relationship rn and it makes me feel all “and for what?? why should he even bother??” about it.

sneaking to sit at the river with jai is like this forbidden, new experience, so it just enhances that feeling of attraction that teh is already feeling towards jai. and esp when he starts telling him about his previous relationship with james, the significance of the plum wine, and how jai ended up breaking up with him. since it’s reflective of teh’s own experiences atm (even in how he kind of self-sabotages himself to push people/oh-aew away first), he clearly takes it to heart. and it makes him want to do an even better job since the play is an autobiographical one for jai. not to mention, teh supposedly being the only one that jai told his story to makes him feel ‘special’......and we all know how teh likes feeling as though he’s special to someone. you can see it in how dejected he is when he thinks jai only told him his story bc he wanted him to get into character better, but perks up the moment jai says he actually told him bc teh’s been doing such a good job (and to encourage him). like i mentioned before, teh’s already feeling vulnerable and isolated from everybody else, so hearing any sort of praise (and esp when it’s from someone that he looks up to as much as jai), is going to pull him in.

when they were hiding from the security guard i was like ughhh i know where this is heading and i. don’t. like. it........

the problem is that i know where teh stands on this. like i know that there’s some attraction on his end. but i don’t know where jai stands. is he intentionally manipulating teh’s feelings for his play? is there any sincerity there? i think it’s obvious that he can tell teh is attracted to him from the glance that they share in this scene, but i can’t get a handle on what he actually wants (which i guess is the point of making his character as mysterious as it is but still). and if he can tell, and he doesn’t actually like teh back in that way, it makes the end scene even more yikes imo.

hmmm teh lying in the pool trying to recreate that feeling right before their first kiss when the both of them just let everything go and sank down into the water. that’s how you KNOW the next scene is supposed to be angsty...bc just like how their first underwater kiss had a sense of sadness to it bc they were hiding, their first (on screen) sex scene has that same sense of sadness, only this time it’s bc teh’s using his attraction to jai/his method actor desire to get into character to fuel the sex instead of bc he genuinely just wants to have sex with oh-aew. and if his reasoning for the sex is bc of that, then his task to recreate their first sexual experience will never live up to the actual first time they had sex (when they BOTH wanted it, and there were no other factors involved).

that’s not to say i don’t think teh doesn’t love oh-aew anymore. i think that there HAS to be some level of love still there amidst all of the confusion, but it feels a lot more like he’s testing his love/attraction to oh-aew during this scene (sort of like how he did with tarn in itsay) than a proper ‘love scene’. like he’s trying to reconfirm his feelings, whilst using oh-aew as inspiration for his role at the same time. it makes my heart ache that this is the first love scene we get from them this series, and it’s marred by the context of what we know is going on in teh’s head. like i said, it’s this permeating sadness throughout...and just knowing that oh-aew has absolutely NO IDEA what’s going on with teh and why he suddenly wants to have sex makes it worse. oh-aew’s been trying to make things work, and in his mind, teh spontaneously coming over like this prob makes him think that things are getting better between them since this is also the closest thing to teh showing any sort of initiative to work on their relationship in this ep so far...

and that’s not also taking away how beautifully this whole scene is shot. i’ve always loved the way that teh and oh-aew play and flirt with each other (bkpp’s chemistry is honestly unparalleled!!) so it was nice to see them be kind of playful before they started kissing again (if you ignore how sad this scene really is). i LOVE the inter-splicing between their first time on the beach and the present. the way the score swells, and little moments where you can see their feet and fingers interlocked on the beach. it gives you such a visceral visual (and totally takes me back to itsay days when that sort of imagery was used a lot more). i just hate that since we know the truth, this scene is more uncomfortable than satisfying despite how nicely shot it is.

i wish we got more domestic moments from them. i know their relationship has sort of grown past those initial moments of flirtation, but it truly makes me sad that we don’t get to see more of them as a couple in general in ipytm. moments like this where they’re lying in bed cuddling each other are so few and far between that i always feel like i have to cherish every little fleeting piece of fluff that i can get. even if idek if this can really be called fluff since the context sort of ruins it.

oh-aew’s still got his heart attack bag :’)))

he was soooooo happy when he met up with his friends 😭 but also, how the hell is it possible for teachers to move deadlines up like that. i FEEL that panic... poor oh-aew...

teh’s in rehearsals again and this time he’s wearing his moon shirt which...i do NOT need those ep 3 itsay vibes rn when i was already dreading this last ten minutes with everything i have in me :((( but anyway, jai’s brought plum wine to class and we know that teh doesn’t usually drink, but he does this time. he tells teh that the taste will change over time (it symbolises the ageing of the relationship process), and teh says it’s a pity he won’t get to taste it next time since jai wants to go abroad to study. then teh tells him he’s worked on the acting exercise and wants to try it out with jai, and i feel like we all knew where it was going to go from here.........

they really had to hammer it in with him missing oh-aew’s call too huh :/

as soon as they started the touching/intimacy exercise again i was just waiting for the catch. even on this rewatch i’m still sitting here chanting “don’t do it teh don’t do it” knowing full well that he kisses jai and there’s no changing that. but then when they cut to oh-aew walking up the stairs with the posters and you hear just how much time he’s sacrificed to help teh/jai on this...sacrificing time EVEN NOW just to go over to their uni to give them the posters when he has a presentation due tomorrow that he and his friends still haven’t finished working on...it’s just heartbreaking knowing what he’s going to end up walking in on.

whether it’s itsay or ipytm, teh’s default state is confusion. so while i think that there’s a certain amount of attraction towards jai there of course, i kind of get the feeling that he’s confusing his feelings of connection with jai (bc of their shared interests and passion) with him falling in love with jai. i feel like his attraction to jai reminds him of what it was like when he was first attracted to oh-aew, and since things have changed so much between him and oh-aew, it’s like he wants to recreate and capture that feeling again with jai (which is also why he wears the moon shirt...he wore that during itsay ep 3 beach scene, which was the moment when the attraction really started to burn between him and oh-aew). he can’t feel that same spark with oh-aew anymore, so he transfers his feelings to jai since, at this point in time, he feels closer to jai than anyone else. instead of growing alongside oh-aew, it’s like he’s choosing to revert back to a time when he was happier.

we know that teh has always been the type of person that will act on his impulses when he feels them. that’s WHY it was so hard to watch...bc i knew while watching that last scene, he was never going to restrain himself or put a stop to those feelings bleeding over into action. and esp not when it could benefit him in some way with his acting too.

in the end, it just makes me so devastated for oh-aew. and i really hope that he doesn’t let this go bc he thinks it’s just teh method acting or getting into character or whatever...i know that teh’s feeling a lot of conflicting things rn, but that’s not an excuse. he really fucked this one up.

the thing is, it’s not that i don’t think teh is capable of acting this way (i’ve seen a few people say that this is ooc for him, but it really isn’t? this confusion and impulsiveness has always been a part of his character from the very start...he was always the one that had the most trouble dealing with his feelings out of the two of them), but the time skips don’t do him any favours bc we lose all those moments that take him to what he’s currently feeling. when we don’t have those moments, then it’s a lot harder to sympathise with him. in itsay, bc we always knew how teh got from point a to point b, even if he did frustrating/silly things, i always understood where he was coming from. i always felt for him. i GOT his struggles, which was why i was always able to empathise with what he was going through. in ipytm, he just comes off as unlikeable bc of how superficial his feelings seem (from what we’re being shown on screen at least).

falling out of love with your significant other/starting to feel things for someone else is obv a fairly common experience, so i don’t blame teh for FEELING like this, but it’s how he treats oh-aew throughout this that doesn’t sit right with me. even if you feel like you’re falling out of love with someone, or that they’ve changed since the first time you fell in love with them, you’d think there’d be some motivation to at least TRY to make things work with them before giving up. we never see that from teh at all. instead, he just see him becoming infatuated with jai (so we barely see teh/oh-aew together in the first place). and while i can see now that a lot of this is due to his own insecurities and inadequacies, it’s also just so disrespectful to oh-aew who's the one that we see putting in all this time and effort (it calls back to their whole “don’t give my time to others” scene in itsay bc we see oh-aew giving so much of his time to teh through helping him out with his play, while teh’s giving that time that should be for oh-aew to jai now). no matter his reasoning, watching teh act that way towards oh-aew does make it increasingly hard to root for him. there’s just too big a disparity in how the two of them choose to act and devote their time to their relationship.

what’s frustrating is that in itsay, teh would fuck up but he would always try to make amends with oh-aew in some way. he would always come forward to try to sort things out after...but there’s nothing here. even after their dinner fight in ep 2, it’s OH-AEW that reaches out to him first (even though it’s teh’s fault that they fought in the first place). where’s that boy that dressed up in his old school uniform in order to talk to oh-aew at his school? or made a whole chinese idioms scrapbook for oh-aew? or gave up his uni admission for oh-aew? i understand that characters and motivations change (and he was obv hopped up on his first love with oh-aew at the time), but it’s just really, really sad to see teh keep messing up and not even try to meet oh-aew halfway with this. yes, you can fuck up, but there are only so many times you can keep fucking up before it starts to look more like a pattern of shitty behaviour than a few forgivable missteps.

another issue is that there’s been so much focus on teh and his flaws that a lot of the time oh-aew comes off as a side character to teh’s story. previously, i understood that since teh was grappling with his sexuality. it made sense that his journey was the primary focus of the plot and character development. but i always felt that there was more room to explore oh-aew’s story (and i thought that we would get a lot more of that in ipytm...esp after ep 1), but it just feels like we kind of skimmed past all of oh-aew’s growth and struggles adjusting to bangkok/uni life so we could turn the attention back to teh again. i just hate that we never get to see more of how oh-aew’s changed in teh’s eyes (other than the surface level things like his hair, new car and major), and that we never get to see more of oh-aew’s life when it’s not related to teh in general. i hope that we’ll get more of oh-aew in the last two eps, but i really don’t know what they’ll give us anymore.

at this point, i don’t even want them as endgame anymore given everything that’s happened in the recent ep. and it pains me so much to say that bc teh/oh-aew are so immensely important to me, but they’re just in such different places in life. and teh esp has so much more growing to do (i think i said this last week too? teh...). oh-aew deserves to be with someone that can see his worth as he is (that won’t cheat on him for one!!). i just want him to be with someone that can make him happy. what i wanted most for them out of this was for the two of them to grow to a better place (together and as individuals), and while i still want that for them as individuals, it’s hard for me to want them to be happy together anymore. at least for the time being.

i’m kind of at a loss for how they’re gonna work through this (and i genuinely want oh-aew to be able to explore his options too...particularly with someone that will actually treat him better than teh’s treating him atm). so at this point it’s kind of looking to me like a break up is inevitable? but i do think it’s necessary  for both of them rn. i feel so heartbroken about it though...like ipytm is actually making ME go through the breakup...breaking up with all my beloved itsay teh/oh-aew memories :((( anyway, i think a break up is also conveniently the best time to put a time skip tbh...so we’ll see if that does end up happening now in future eps.

this one took such a long time to write up bc i wrote like a quarter of this RIGHT after i finished watching the ep (so you can clearly tell which parts were me right after the ep, and which parts were me after i had some time to sit on what happened 😂), but i thought it was best to take a bit of a break. i didn’t rewatch it again until i calmed down a little and sorted out my thoughts some more (though i know this is still pretty messy). but yeah, i’m still very much interested in watching how they things are going to progress from here...but i can’t deny how sad i’ve been feeling after this.

[kittyprincessofcats]

RWBY Volume 8, Episode 13 (Worthy)

Well, wow. That sure was an episode that happened.

Thoughts under the cut.

Anyone who leaves spoilers for episode 14 on this will get blocked.

- First of all, I want to now talk about the spoiler I saw for this episode last week, to put the anger from my last post into context: After I had just finished watching episodes 8-12 and started writing my post about them, I went into one of the RWBY tags bc I’m dumb and saw a post that said (I don’t remember the exact words, but more or less): “I’m so glad Yang is finally dead, so now her fans can shut up about her and everyone can ship Blacksun instead.”

… Yeah. Imagine seeing that when you haven’t seen the actual episode and have no idea what really happened. I honestly completely panicked for a few minutes, before remembering I don’t actually know anything and this might just be a “Weiss gets impaled in Volume 5, but one episode later it turns out she’ll be fine” situation. So then I had to look up what actually happened to Yang, because otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to sleep. So, to the person who made that post: Fuck you. Not only did you freak people out for no reason (because come on, there’s no way falling into the void actually kills you – and even if it does, we at least definitely don’t know that for sure after episode 13), but even if Yang had actually died, it’s super shitty that your first reaction to a beloved queer character’s death would be “yay, now people can ship my m/f ship instead”. Like, I don’t care if you personally dislike Yang/ dislike Bumbleby/ prefer Blacksun – show a little bit of decency.

Phew. Sorry, I had to get that off my chest because it really made me angry. Now let’s get into the actual episode:

- “Worthy” as a title pretty much already made me predict that Cinder would succeed in her plan, since “you have to be worthy” was what Watts told her in his speech. She’s gotten the message and is now back to efficient plans – and while I love to see it, it also very much scares me when it comes to our heroes’ survival chances. The last time Cinder was doing well, we lost Pyrrha, so… help.

- And gosh, this whole episode was so intense! I feel like it mostly set up a bunch of very intense situations that are going to escalate in the last episode that I’m very much not ready for.

- I still think the whole central location between the worlds is really beautiful, if dangerous. (They should have specified to Ambrosius that they want handrails or something.)

- Nora using her hammer like a witch’s broom was amazing.

- I also loved the scene with Jaune and the people at the train station; that was really funny.

- The middle of the desert might not have been the best place for the exit. Didn’t the group consider that there might be a sandstorm or something else unpredictable out there? Couldn’t they have picked a better exit point?

- Cinder causing an explosion in the middle of the evacuation that throws multiple people into the void was bad and all – but it was still one hell of an entrance!

- I love that now that Cinder realized that she has to rely on teamwork, she’s suddenly being so nice to everyone. Apologizing to Neo, complimenting Watts on “tearing the kingdom apart with nothing but his intellect”, that soft “You deserve this, Arthur”, complimenting Team RWBY on their plan, thanking them for teaching her “one last lesson”. Yeah, maybe she’s just talking to Neo and Watts like this because she needs their help, and to Team RWBY because she’s confident she’ll win – but it’s still amazing to see the shift in her attitude and how she’s clearly changed her tactic.

- It’s insane to me that some people correctly predicted that Cinder would ask Jinn the last question based JUST on the fact that there’s a part in the opening where everyone else freezes in time while she walks past them. Holy hell! I love trying to guess stuff based on the intro, but I would have never thought that far.

- Cinder’s question to Jinn seems like a waste considering it was Jinn’s last question, but maybe it just seems that way to us as viewers because Jinn didn’t reveal anything we didn’t already know. Was it the right thing for Cinder to do? I don’t know, to be honest. Yes, it did give her the chance to ruin the heroes’ plans, but I have a feeling Salem won’t be happy about the question being gone. Pretty sure Salem was going to ask Jinn how to get the Beacon relic, and now she can’t do that. (Cinder ruining Salem’s plans for the beacon relic? Let that be foreshadowing, please.) I mean, maybe it’s worth it from Salem’s POV if it gets them the staff and then she’ll have 2 of the 4 relics – but they could have still gotten the staff later, while I don’t know if Salem has any plan B for the beacon relic. And I’m a little worried about Cinder now. I always thought that Salem wouldn’t kill Cinder no matter what, because she still needs the Fall Maiden for the beacon relic – but if she now has to wait another 100 years for the beacon relic anyway, I’m not sure if she’ll have a reason to keep Cinder alive. (And I’m still worried about that “Some lives will end much too soon” line playing over that scene of Cinder clutching her Grimm arm in the opening.) I also wonder if Cinder even knew that this was Jinn’s last question. Did Jinn even tell her that? Also, when will the 100 years even be up? Do the questions just reset every 100 years regardless of when they were used? So maybe we’re already at year 80 or something and will only have to wait 20 years?

- The cut from everyone at the central command place screaming to them being dead was kinda funny in a “very dark humour” way.

- When Harriet first jumped onto that ship with the bomb, I, like an idiot, thought that she was finally being sensible and trying to get the bomb as far away from Atlas and Mantle as possible, not that she was trying to still drop it on Mantle. She and Ironwood might as well be working for Salem’s team at this point, because they’re doing everything to help the villains’ plan. And the villains are even counting on it! Watts freed Ironwood from his cell and is piloting Harriet’s ship. Those two are just straight up helping Salem’s team in their attempts to… what was it? Save Atlas?

- Ironwood killing Jacques was awful and proves once again that Ironwood has zero morals left. And I didn’t like Jacques, but that was the kind of death that absolutely no one deserves. He had no way to escape or fight back, he was defenseless, locked up in a prison cell with nowhere to run – that’s not just a murder, that’s an execution without a trial. And Jacques wasn’t even a threat, he wasn’t in the way of any of Ironwood’s plans. Ironwood killed him literally just because he could. And no one who thinks they’re the good guy (and Ironwood still thinks he’s the good guy) should go around just killing people who aren’t even a threat.

- And then we have Yang falling into the void. Honestly, as heartbreaking as Blake’s sobs and anger are, I kind of love this from a “supreme angst, let’s see my faves suffer” perspective. That said, Yang better actually be fine or else.

- Actually, my prediction is that the rest of team RWBY will jump into the void to save Yang in the last episode. Because they’re all falling in the opening, and because “Sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall and fight for every life”. That’s pretty much the only prediction I feel somewhat confident about, for the rest I have no idea.

- I wonder if it would have been better if Penny had just gone through the doorway and gotten the staff to Vacuo. I get why she didn’t, because Yang just fell and her other friends were in danger… but at the same time, she was supposed to protect the population and the staff (and she has the maiden powers that I’m sure Cinder still wants). If she had just gotten out of there, at least the group in Vacuo would have had some help against the sandstorm and the Grimm. But then again, it would have also severely weakened Term RWBY’s chances against Cinder and Neo… it’s a tough call, really.

- “Why didn’t you just learn your lesson?” “Oh, Penny… I did.” Okay, but that’s the thing: She really did! Just not the lesson Penny wanted her to learn. And notice how Cinder called Penny by her first name again? She didn’t use to do that. I still think somewhere down the line Penny has earned her respect.

- I wonder if Penny’s technically weaker now because she’s human (?? is she??). She’s definitely not used to fighting without her robotic parts (as you can see when she tries to reach for her swords and realizes they’re not there anymore). I summoning those swords like she then did her semblance or another maiden power?

- Blake now has to choose between helping Ruby and helping Penny and Weiss – gosh, the suspense…

- I’m glad Vine at least finally tried to stop Harriet now! (Better late than never.) But I really wouldn’t blame Qrow and Robyn for crashing into their ship. It’s not like they had any way of knowing that Vine was trying to talk sense into Harriet. Also, Qrow crashing through Harriet’s windscreen was amazing.

- Winter and Ironwood are going to fight to the death and I’m so scared of it. (I just need Winter to survive, please…)

- When Weiss described the doorway as a “one-way ticket to Vacuo” last episode, I briefly wondered if that meant they wouldn’t be let back through, but then I brushed it aside and didn’t think about it too much anymore. Oh, damn. You really do have to be very specific with Ambrosius.

- I’m not even sure which location is the best to be in right now because they all seem very unsafe: Atlas and Mantle are unsafe because Atlas is falling, because Mantle might still get blown up by Harriet, and because Salem might still come back any time. The place between worlds is unsafe because of the void and because there’s a big fight happening right there. And Vacuo is unsafe because of the Grimm and the sandstorm. So really, they’re all awful for the civilians right now.

- And now I’m thinking the volume might actually end with the protagonists split into three groups as well: Team RWBY in the void (that they’ll spend Volume 9 finding their way back from), one half of the other characters in Vacuo (Oscar, Ren, Emerald, maybe more?), and the other half still in Atlas/Mantle (Qrow, Robyn, Marrow, Winter, maybe more).

- I’m super nervous about the last episode. I haven’t seen any spoilers at all so far, and I plan to keep it that way. I’ll probably completely ignore anything RWBY-related until next week because the anxiety would kill me otherwise. I’m really worried we’ll get a character death or even several. And ironically, my first prediction on who might die this Volume (Penny, Nora, Winter, Cinder) hasn’t changed all that much. I’m worried about Penny because she has the Maiden Powers and the staff, so Cinder will come after her (but I really think it would be an awful writing choice to kill her off after we just went through so much to save her). I’m very worried about Winter because she’s engaged in a duel to the death with a man who has a big canon that he just blew someone up with. I’m worried for Cinder because of the opening and because Salem might be pissed at her for using the last question. I’m worried for everyone who’s still on Atlas and might get blown up by the bomb (Qrow, Robyn, Marrow, Winter again). And I’m very worried for the characters who are in the in-between realm. Not so much Team RWBY, but I’m worried about Nora, Jaune, and Penny. So yeah, I’m pretty much worried about everyone and very much not ready. Now let me ignore RWBY’s existence for a week – or only reblog posts I already have saved as drafts – because it’s the only way I’ll know peace.

[luukeskywalker]

i see so many arguments about whether or not it's okay to like jiang cheng; whether or not he's abusive, whether or not he's deserving of a "redemption" or reconciliation with wei wuxian, whether or not his actions and pain are justified, etc. and because he's such a complicated person, and because we all interpret his actions differently, we are never ever going to come to a general consensus on him.

but i'll give my take on him, because i love him, and i really don't see a lot of, uh, more lenient takes on Why He’s Like That. also i’m putting this under a readmore bc this is literally just for me i don’t think anybody else in the world wants to read this rambling hahaha

anyways!~

the man has problems. lots of them. he doesn't know how to truthfully voice his emotions outside of a frame of anger. he was not raised to be a wife like jiang yanli, he was not taught to perform emotional labor for the sake of his future spouse. he was taught that he is the next sect leader, and that emotions are both his weakness (from his mother) and his strength (from his father). he was brought up from a young age under the belief that there was always an unattainable goal placed right in front of him.

of course that's not all officially "canon", but you can easily see it if you read between the lines. you really can't take anything jiang cheng says seriously. not when he was a kid, and not when he’s an adult, either. and i don’t say this to excuse his actions, or to say that he’s necessarily justified because he had a tough childhood. everyone in mo dao zu shi had a tough childhood, he’s not special for that! but the way he was raised, in my opinion, explains a lot about who he is as a person, and how he interacts with the world around him. again: it doesn’t justify his actions. it merely explains them.

i think he’s terribly interesting. every character reacts to their traumas in different ways - lan xichen covers everything up with a gentle smile, wei wuxian cracks jokes about his own mortality, lan wangji searched out evil as often as he could to make the world a little safer - hell, even nie huaisang adapted to trauma by creating an entirely different persona so that he could gather information and plot in peace. jiang cheng’s reaction to trauma was to take that anger he grew up with, all his frustration at never being good enough, all his worry about his family, all his rage at the people who have betrayed and left him - and he turned it into armor. 

he doesn’t know how to take the armor off. after years and years (thirteen or sixteen, it’s really up to the reader, i suppose), he’s worn it so tightly that he thinks that anger is all he is. everyone else thinks so, anyways, and when have the greater masses ever been wrong in mo dao zu shi?

oh, that’s right, literally every single time. 

call me an apologist if you must but i highly doubt jiang cheng ever actually tortured and killed demonic cultivators that reminded him of wei wuxian. the only time we have ever heard that was through idle gossip, and if mo dao zu shi has taught us anything, it’s that idle gossip is never to be trusted. he tells jin ling to kill wei wuxian in the beginning, but instead he decides he wants to take wei wuxian back to lotus pier. His first instinct is to feel anger, is to lash out. and he was still angry, but can you really blame him? he’s spent so many years with the weight of his family’s death weighing on him - practically all alone - and the man he considers responsible for it shows up out of the blue one night. 

and yes, wei wuxian’s isn’t solely responsible for jiang cheng’s loss. duh. but he had a pretty big part to play in all of it, and trauma can do weird things to someone’s memories. jiang cheng may know on some logical level that his brother isn’t responsible for all of it, but years pass and pain doesn’t really fade as much as it should, and feelings and memories warp into something more easily digestible - it gives jiang cheng something to feel besides conflicting mourning. anger is where he feels safest.

and that brings me to another point - his relationship with jin ling. now, this one is a bit of a hot topic (lol). there’s, afaik, a lot of discourse around whether or not jiang cheng is abusive towards jin ling. and i do understand and see why people would think he is abusive - for all the reasons i mentioned above. he’s a traumatized man who finds comfort in anger. he’s particularly strict with jin ling when it comes to night hunts, especially during that hunt in dafan mountain. he makes threats of physical harm and is pretty much always yelling. i can see why people see these actions and label him abusive.

but i really don’t agree. he is strict with jin ling on night hunts - he’s terrified something will happen to his sister’s child, at the same time he wants jin ling to succeed. who set up all those nets for him during that hunt? clearly jiang cheng. the whole “if you can’t catch something, don’t bother coming home” line dripped with “i have said this exact phrase a million times before and i’ve never meant it” energy, as does every “i’ll break your legs” comment. jin ling himself admits it - jiang cheng has never, ever laid a hand on him! the only uncle to ever smack him around is wei wuxian. 

of course abuse is more than physical harm. but i don’t really think he abuses jin ling at all. jiang cheng really loves jin ling, he cares for that boy more than literally anything else in the world. a scene that really sticks out to me is “who made you cry?!” - he does not admonish jin ling for crying. he wants to know who made his boy upset so he can go beat them up. jin ling clearly knows he’s not in any real danger from his uncle - if he was, why the hell would be continuously disobey him and do shit that directly pisses him off? the ONE time he was truly afraid of going back to jiang cheng was because he’d lied and disobeyed jiang cheng’s direct order. sure he wouldn’t be like, beaten for that, but he’d been nervous as all hell at koi tower, and i’d personally attribute that behavior to guilt. he knew he’d done a bad thing, but he’d done it anyways. 

this post is really insanely long so i’m just gonna try and wrap it up here: jiang cheng is a really complicated and fucked up dude. i get why people don’t like him but i don’t really agree with the sentiment. he’s fucked up and crazy and so is everyone else in mdzs, he’s just the most vocal about it. call all of this fanon if you want, idc, it’s just how i’ve perceived his character after experiencing mo dao zu shi like five times in different formats. his anger is his protection, because nobody else is gonna protect him. he tries to use it to protect jin ling, but to anyone who isn’t jin ling, it comes off as overtly harsh. love languages are hard to understand sometimes. jiang cheng’s love language is more complicated than the entirety of the fucking homestuck shipping chart.

if anyone has even read all of this, why, why did you decide to do that, also thank you? please don’t fight with me on this my mind will not be changed lol

[twoidiotwriters1]

Written In The Stars LXIX (Harry Potter xF!Oc)

A/N: I’m so pissed bc last chapter came out in September 1st and I just ignored it??? I’m such an idiot?? Physically I’m on quarantine, spiritually I’m wherever these losers are -Danny

Words: 4,499

Warnings: None!

Series’ Masterilst

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

Chapter Four: Bagman and Crouch.

"Morning, Basil," Mr. Weasley picked up the boot and handed it to the wizard.

"Really, why can't wizards just use cars?" Mel grumbled from the ground.

Two hands reach out for her and she found Fred and Harry standing side by side. The first one had an innocent and amused expression. Harry, however, glanced at the boy beside him with slight annoyance.

"Thank you boys," She said, quickly holding onto both hands and standing up.

"Told you," Fred chuckled.

"Is apparating just as uncomfortable as this?"

"Wouldn't know," He shrugged. "Never done it."

She brushed the dirt off her clothes, a little startled at the way Harry grabbed her bag and eagerly handed it back to her, still glaring at Fred in a strange way while the twin pretended not to notice, a sly smile on his face as he walked back to where his twin was.

"Hello there, Arthur," said Basil. "Not on duty, eh? It's all right for some... We've been here all night... You'd better get out of the way, we've got a big party coming in from the Black Forest at five-fifteen. Hang on, I'll find your campsite... Weasley... Weasley..."

"I'm sorry about my dad," Said a voice she wasn't familiar with. It was Cedric. "He's one of those who doesn't think twice before talking, but he's not a bad man..."

"It's okay," Mel grinned. "I'm one of those who does not think twice before snapping at someone. Bet you've heard..."

Cedric scrunched up his nose in a way that Mel considered adorable.

"Might have, once or twice."

"I'm also nice, I promise," She reached out a hand for him to shake, which he did almost immediately.

"It's a pleasure to oficially meet, then," He nodded, wearing his best smile.

"–About a quarter of a mile's walk over there, first field you come to. Site manager's called Mr. Roberts." Mr. Weasley's friend told them out loud. "Diggory... second field... ask for Mr. Payne."

"Thanks, Basil," said Mr. Weasley, and everyone followed him.

"So this is your last year at Hogwarts?" She asked the boy, considering a bit awkward to just walk in silence.

"Yeah," He shrugged. "I'm not sure of what I'll do once I'm done, but I think I might travel a bit before working."

"Any place in particular?" Cedric pondered, taking her question very seriously.

"Some place warm."

She nodded, thinking of anything else she could add, however, Cedric talked first.

"Is it true that Dumbledore gives you extra lessons?"

"Yes," She smiled. "It's sort of a family thing, and since my dad isn't around to teach me..."

It wasn't entirely true, but Dumbledore had admitted that her abilities were a thing women in their family had, so it wasn't a lie either.

"That's cool," Cedric replied. "Is he good at teaching?"

"The best," Mel continued eagerly. "He knows ever so many things about almost everything! I'd love to be like him once I'm older."

"Well, you're a Dumbledore," The boy raised his eyebrows. "I'm sure the brains must be part of the family as well." She laughed at this, not sure of how to answer. Instead, she casually changed the subject to Quidditch.

"So are you a Bulgaria, or Ireland supporter?"

Cedric quickly perked up at this, seemengly happy to talk about something so normal that had nothing to do with families.

"Ireland, I think... but my dad's with Rumania, so I have to support a little quieter..." They laughed discretely at his words.

Next fifteen minutes past rather quickly, Cedric was nice and social enough to keep the conversation flowing, Mel felt a little guilty of how everyone at school perceived him as just as pretty face with no brains or goals. She made a mental note to never let any of her friends make any negative comments about Cedric ever again.

When the time came that they had to part, Cedric waved at her joyfully and she returned it, hoping to see him again soon. She felt someone nudged her arm and turned to look at Harry, who pointed at the group that was already moving forward.

"Sorry," She said with a small smile. "Won't stay behind again, promise."

"Boys have been awfully nice to you lately..." He grumbled, looking back at Cedric over his shoulder.

"It certainly does feel better than to be chasen down a street while they threw rocks at you, you know?"

Harry's eyes widened, cheeks flushing at her words.

"Yeah, you're... you're right," He cleared his throat.

"Morning!" said Mr. Weasley, waving at a man standing near.

"Morning," the man (a muggle, for the looks of it) answered.

"Would you be Mr. Roberts?"

"Aye, I would," said Mr. Roberts. "And who're you?"

"Weasley — two tents, booked a couple of days ago?"

"Aye," said Mr. Roberts, consulting a list tacked to the door. "You've got a space up by the wood there. Just the one night?"

"That's it," said Mr. Weasley.

"You'll be paying now, then?" said Mr. Roberts.

"Ah — right — certainly —" said Mr. Weasley. He retreated a short distance from the cottage and beckoned Harry toward him. "Help me, Harry," he muttered, pulling a roll of Muggle money from his pocket and starting to peel the notes apart. "This one's a — a — a ten? Ah yes, I see the little number on it now. . . . So this is a five?"

"A twenty," Harry threw a desperate look her way, probably nervous about the man who was listening closely to their conversation.

"Ah yes, so it is... I don't know, these little bits of paper..." Mr. Weasley grumbled.

"You foreign?" said Mr. Roberts.

"Foreign?"

"You're not the first one who's had trouble with money. I had two try and pay me with great gold coins the size of hubcaps ten minutes ago."

"Did you really?"

"Never been this crowded... Hundreds of pre-bookings. People usually just turn up..."

"Is that right?" said Mr. Weasley, insisting for the man to take the money he was holding out but failing to succeed.

"Aye– People from all over. Loads of for- eigners. And not just foreigners. Weirdos, you know? There's a bloke walking 'round in a kilt and a poncho."

"Shouldn't he?" asked Mr. Weasley nervously.

"It's like some sort of... I dunno... like some sort of rally... They all seem to know each other. Like a big party."

"Obliviate!" A second man exclaimed, pointing his wand at Mr. Roberts.

"A map of the campsite for you," Mr. Roberts said after a moment of quiet change on his features. "And your change."

"Thanks very much," said Mr. Weasley.

The wizard who had charmed the muggle accompanied them to the door.

"Been having a lot of trouble with him. Needs a Memory Charm ten times a day to keep him happy. And Ludo Bagman's not helping. Trotting around talking about Bludgers and Quaffles at the top of his voice, not a worry about anti-Muggle security. Blimey, I'll be glad when this is over. See you later, Arthur." And with that, he disapparated.

"I thought Mr. Bagman was Head of Magical Games and Sports," said Ginny. "He should know better than to talk about Bludgers near Muggles, shouldn't he?"

"He should," said Mr. Weasley. "but Ludo's always been a bit... well... lax about security. You couldn't wish for a more enthusiastic head of the sports department though. He played Quidditch for England himself, you know. And he was the best Beater the Wimbourne Wasps ever had."

Halfway up the field stood an extravagant confection of striped silk like a miniature palace, with several live peacocks tethered at the entrance. A little farther on they passed a tent that had three floors and several turrets; and a short way beyond that was a tent that had a front garden attached, complete with birdbath, sundial, and fountain.

"Always the same," said Mr. Weasley, smiling. "We can't resist showing off when we get together. Ah, here we are, look, this is us." They had reached the very edge of the wood at the top of the field, and here was an empty space, with a small sign hammered into the ground that read weezly.

"Couldn't have a better spot!" said Mr. Weasley happily. "The field is just on the other side of the wood there, we're as close as we could be." He hoisted his backpack from his shoulders. "Right," he said excitedly, "no magic allowed, strictly speaking, not when we're out in these numbers on Muggle land. We'll be putting these tents up by hand! Shouldn't be too difficult. . . . Muggles do it all the time. . . . Here, Harry, where do you reckon we should start?"

"Harry has never gone camping before," Mel told him gently. "But I used to put up a tent for when we camped outside my house, remember Harry? I can help, don't worry..."

However, Harry insisting on helping anyway. Soon Emily, Mel, Harry, and Hermione had the tents ready. The problem was that there was only two and they were too small for all the people in their group, she turned to inform her mother about this when Mr. Weasley spoke up.

"We'll be a bit cramped, but I think we'll all squeeze in. Come and have a look."

She turned to her mother fully now, a quizzical look on her face while the woman chuckled, pushing her further.

"You'll love this..." Was all she commented.

And love it she did. Inside it looked like she had entered an actual flat, it had three rooms, a kitchen and a bathroom. It was impressive, but Mel thought it took out a little of the charm, camping wasn't supposed to be this comfortable, or so she'd thought before.

"You want to come with us on an adventure?" Ron asked, suddenly appearing at the entrance.

"Where to?" She asked, leaving her backpack on a chair.

He showed her the kettle he kept on his hands.

"To get water."

Everything around them invited her to give up on the no-magic rule and explore, so many different people, of all ages, colors and sizes!

She allowed herself to imagine a great deal, the homes and cities and comunities these wizards and witches may lived on, their families and background. A much more larger world for her to see...

Cedric's idea about traveling before settling down made complete sense to her, and she remembered the talk she'd had with Harry a few years prior, about them traveling the world together, sending postcards to their friends and family from all around the globe.

A fuzzy feeling made its way through her chest at this, picturing the endless adventures she could have with her best friend as adults and free from school.

"Er — is it my eyes, or has everything gone green?" asked Ron, bringing her back to the present.

It wasn't just Ron's eyes. They had walked into a patch of tents that were all covered with a thick growth of shamrocks, so that it looked as though small, oddly shaped hillocks had sprouted out of the earth. Grinning faces could be seen under those that had their flaps open. Then, from behind them, they heard their names.

"Harry! Mel! Ron! Hermione!"

Seamus Finnigan was sitting in front of his own tent, with a woman that had to be his mother,  Dean Thomas was also there.

"Like the decorations?" said Seamus. "The Ministry's not too happy."

"Ah, why shouldn't we show our colors?" said the woman. "You should see what the Bulgarians have got dangling all over their tents. You'll be supporting Ireland, of course?"

"Sure..."

"Of course!"

"Like we'd say anything else surrounded by that lot." Ron said under his breath once they left Finnigan's tent to keep going on their quest. Mel snorted, just nodding as a reply.

"I wonder what the Bulgarians have got dangling all over their tents?" said Hermione.

"Let's go and have a look," said Harry.

The tents here had not been bedecked with plant life, but each and every one of them had the same poster attached to it, a poster of a very surly face with heavy black eyebrows. The picture was, of course, moving, but all it did was blink and scowl.

"Krum," said Ron quietly.

"What?" said Hermione.

"Krum!" said Ron. "Viktor Krum, the Bulgarian Seeker!"

"He looks really grumpy," said Hermione, looking around at the many Krums blinking and scowling at them.

" 'Really grumpy '?" Ron raised his eyes to the heavens. "Who cares what he looks like? He's unbelievable. He's really young too. Only just eighteen or something. He's a genius, you wait until tonight, you'll see."

"I hardly believe that being a good seeker makes you a genius," Mel commented.

"Thanks," Harry replied grumpily.

"I didn't say you were stupid," She grinned. "Though coming to think about it, you've done some foolish things throughout the years..."

"You're one to talk!" He teased.

"I am, actually," Mel smiled. "I remember when we were ten and you tried to escape your Aunt Marge's dog..."

"Don't say it–"

"And you ended up on top of a tree until midnight because she just wouldn't call her dog," Mel giggled. "Which was very rude of her, but come on– you climbed a tree instead of running to my house!"

"I was ten!" He exclaimed over Ron's cackles. "Oh, bugger off..."

There was a line for the tap. Harry, Mel, Ron, and Hermione joined it, behind a pair of men who were arguing. One of them was wearing a nightgown. The other was a Ministry wizard a holding a pair of trousers and beyond exasperated.

"Just put them on, Archie, there's a good chap. You can't walk around like that, the Muggle at the gate's already getting suspicious —"

"I bought this in a Muggle shop," said the old wizard stubbornly. "Muggles wear them."

"Muggle women wear them, Archie, not the men, they wear these," said the Ministry wizard, and he brandished the pinstriped trousers.

"I'm not putting them on," said old Archie in indignation. "I like a healthy breeze 'round my privates, thanks."

Hermione was overcome with such a strong fit of the giggles at this point that she had to duck out of the queue and only returned when Archie had collected his water and moved away.

Walking more slowly now, because of the weight of the water, they made their way back through the campsite. Here and there, they saw more familiar faces: other Hogwarts students with their families. Oliver Wood, the old captain of Harry's House Quidditch team, who had just left Hogwarts, dragged Harry over to his parents' tent to introduce him, and told him excitedly that he had just been signed to the Puddlemere United reserve team. Next they were hailed by Ernie Macmillan, a Hufflepuff fourth year, and a little farther on they saw Cho Chang, a very pretty girl who played Seeker on the Ravenclaw team. She waved and smiled at Harry, who slopped quite a lot of water down his front as he waved back.

Now, Mel wasn't going to admit that the huff that came out of her mouth right at that moment was because of the boy's reaction, but Ron definitely made sure to tease both of them relentlessly until Harry found the perfect excuse, pointing at some tent at his left.

"Who d'you reckon they are? They don't go to Hogwarts, do they?"

" 'Spect they go to some foreign school," said Ron. "I know there are others. Never met anyone who went to one, though. Bill had a penfriend at a school in Brazil... this was years and years ago... and he wanted to go on an exchange trip but Mum and Dad couldn't afford it. His penfriend got all offended when he said he wasn't going and sent him a cursed hat. It made his ears shrivel up."

"That's awful," Mel said over Harry's laughter. "Might been silly, but I never stopped to think about other Schools... I was too excited about being admitted into one that it went right over my head..."

"Me neither," Harry admitted. "I'd love to know a bit about them, though."

"You've been gone ages," George groaned as they entered the boys' tent.

"You're welcome," Mel replied, lightly slapping his head as she walked past.

"Met a few people," said Ron. "You not got that fire started yet?"

"Dad's having fun with the matches," Fred pointed towards the entrance with a stern face.

Mr. Weasley was having no success at all in lighting the fire, but it wasn't for lack of trying. Splintered matches littered the ground around him, but he looked as though he was having the time of his life.

"Oops!" he said as he managed to light a match and promptly dropped it in surprise.

"Come here, Mr. Weasley," said Hermione kindly, taking the box from him, and showing him how to do it properly.

At last they got the fire lit, though it was at least another hour before it was hot enough to cook anything. There was plenty to watch while they waited, however. Their tent seemed to be pitched right alongside a kind of thoroughfare to the field, and Ministry members kept hurrying up and down it, greeting Mr. Weasley cordially as they passed.

"That was Cuthbert Mockridge, Head of the Goblin Liaison Office... Here comes Gilbert Wimple; he's with the Committee on Experimental Charms; he's had those horns for a while now... Hello, Arnie . . . Arnold Peasegood, he's an Obliviator — member of the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad, you know... and that's Bode and Croaker... they're Unspeakables..."

"They're what?"

"From the Department of Mysteries, top secret, no idea what they get up to..."

Mel's eyes lingered on the people Mr. Weasley had mentioned. Something about the circumstances of their job and the name gave her a thrill, imagining all the things they may see on a daily basis.

At last, the fire was ready, and they had just started cooking eggs and sausages when Bill, Charlie, and Percy came strolling out of the woods toward them.

"Just Apparated, Dad," said Percy loudly. "Ah, excellent, lunch!"

They were halfway through their plates of eggs and sausages when Mr. Weasley jumped to his feet, waving and grinning at a man who was striding toward them.

"Aha!" he said. "The man of the moment! Ludo!"

"Ahoy there! Arthur, old man, What a day, eh? What a day! Could we have asked for more perfect weather? A cloudless night coming... and hardly a hiccough in the arrangements... Not much for me to do!"

Behind him, a group of haggard-looking Ministry wizards rushed past, pointing at the distant evidence of some sort of a magical fire that was sending violet sparks twenty feet into the air.

Percy hurried forward with his hand outstretched. Apparently his disapproval of the way Ludo Bagman ran his department did not prevent him from wanting to make a good impression.

"Ah — yes, this is my son Percy. He's just started at the Ministry — and this is Fred — no, George, sorry — that's Fred — Bill, Charlie, Ron — my daughter, Ginny — this is Emily Sultens, mother of one of Ron's friends and Ron's friends, Hermione Granger, Mel Dumbledore and Harry Potter."

Mel smiled politely at the man, noticing how his eyes traveled from Harry's scar and settled on her face for a brief second, before returning to Mr. Weasley.

"Everyone, this is Ludo Bagman, you know who he is, it's thanks to him we've got such good tickets —"

"Fancy a flutter on the match, Arthur?" The man asked. "I've already got Roddy Pontner betting me Bulgaria will score first — I offered him nice odds, considering Ireland's front three are the strongest I've seen in years — and little Agatha Timms has put up half shares in her eel farm on a week-long match."

"Oh... go on then," said Mr. Weasley. "Let's see... a Galleon on Ireland to win?"

"A Galleon? Very well, very well... any other takers?"

"They're a bit young to be gambling," said Mr. Weasley. "Molly wouldn't like —"

"We'll bet thirty-seven Galleons, fifteen Sickles, three Knuts," said Fred, and he and his brother pulled out all the money they had. "that Ireland wins — but Viktor Krum gets the Snitch. Oh and we'll throw in a fake wand."

"You don't want to go showing Mr. Bagman rubbish like that —" Percy hissed, but Bagman didn't seem to think the wand was rubbish at all; on the contrary, his boyish face shone with excitement as he took it from Fred, and when the wand gave a loud squawk and turned into a rubber chicken, Bagman roared with laughter.

"Excellent! I haven't seen one that convincing in years! I'd pay five Galleons for that!"

Percy froze in an attitude of stunned disapproval.

"Boys," said Mr. Weasley under his breath, "I don't want you betting... That's all your savings... Your mother —"

"Don't be a spoilsport, Arthur!" boomed Ludo Bagman, rattling his pockets excitedly. "They're old enough to know what they want! You reckon Ireland will win but Krum'll get the Snitch? Not a chance, boys, not a chance... I'll give you excellent odds on that one... We'll add five Galleons for the funny wand, then, shall we..."

Mr. Weasley looked on helplessly as Ludo Bagman whipped out a notebook and quill and began jotting down the twins' names.

"Cheers," said George, taking the slip of parchment Bagman handed him and tucking it away carefully. Bagman turned most cheerfully back to Mr. Weasley.

"You shouldn't have," Mel told them worryingly. "What will you do if you lose?"

"We'll worry about that, Lady Dumbledore," Fred told her carelessly. "Don't fuss over it just yet."

"But if your mum finds out–"

"Mum's done enough for us already," George replied hastily.

"Couldn't do me a brew, I suppose? I'm keeping an eye out for Barty Crouch. My Bulgarian opposite number's making difficulties, and I can't understand a word he's saying. Barty'll be able to sort it out. He speaks about a hundred and fifty languages."

"Mr. Crouch?" said Percy, suddenly abandoning his look of poker-stiff disapproval and positively writhing with excitement. "He speaks over two hundred! Mermish and Gobbledegook and Troll..."

"Anyone can speak Troll," said Fred dismissively. "All you have to do is point and grunt."

Percy threw Fred an extremely nasty look and stoked the fire vigorously to bring the kettle back to the boil.

"Any news of Bertha Jorkins yet, Ludo?" Mr. Weasley asked as Bagman settled himself down on the grass beside them all.

"Not a dicky bird," said Bagman comfortably. "But she'll turn up. Poor old Bertha... memory like a leaky cauldron and no sense of direction. Lost, you take my word for it. She'll wander back into the office sometime in October, thinking it's still July."

"You don't think it might be time to send someone to look for her?" Mr. Weasley suggested tentatively as Percy handed Bagman his tea.

"Barty Crouch keeps saying that," said Bagman, his round eyes widening innocently, "but we really can't spare anyone at the moment. Oh — talk of the devil! Barty!"

A wizard had just Apparated at their fireside, and he could not have made more of a contrast with Ludo Bagman, sprawled on the grass in his old Wasp robes. Barty Crouch was a stiff, upright, elderly man, dressed in an impeccably crisp suit and tie. The parting in his short gray hair was almost unnaturally straight, and his narrow toothbrush mustache looked as though he trimmed it using a slide rule. His shoes were very highly polished.

"Pull up a bit of grass, Barty," said Ludo.

"No thank you, Ludo," Crouch replied. "I've been looking for you everywhere. The Bulgarians are insisting we add another twelve seats to the Top Box."

"Oh is that what they're after?" said Bagman. "I thought the chap was asking to borrow a pair of tweezers. Bit of a strong accent."

"Mr. Crouch!" Percy sort of gasped. "Would you like a cup of tea?"

"Oh," Mr. Crouch, looked over at Percy. "Yes — thank you, Weatherby"

Fred, George, and Mel had to drained their chuckles into their cups. She didn't want to make fun of him, but it was just his luck...

"Oh and I've been wanting a word with you too, Arthur," said Mr. Crouch. "Ali Bashir's on the warpath. He wants a word with you about your embargo on flying carpets."

"I sent him an owl about that just last week. If I've told him once I've told him a hundred times: Carpets are defined as a Muggle Artifact by the Registry of Proscribed Charmable Objects, but will he listen?"

"I doubt it. He's desperate to export here." Mr. Crouch took the tea, silently thanking Percy.

"Well, they'll never replace brooms in Britain, will they?" asked Bagman.

"Ali thinks there's a niche in the market for a family vehicle," said Mr. Crouch. "I remember my grandfather had an Axminster that could seat twelve — but that was before carpets were banned, of course."

Mel was elated with the conversation. It sounded like a day-to-day coming from the men in front of her, but everything sounded so fantastical she didn't have any problems to keep up with the conversation.

"So, been keeping busy, Barty?" said Bagman.

"Fairly. Organizing Portkeys across five continents is no mean feat, Ludo."

"I expect you'll both be glad when this is over?" said Mr. Weasley.

"Glad! Don't know when I've had more fun... Still, it's not as though we haven't got anything to look forward to, eh, Barty? Eh? Plenty left to organize, eh?"

"We agreed not to make the announcement until all the details —"

"Oh details!" said Bagman. "They've signed, haven't they? They've agreed, haven't they? I bet you anything these kids'll know soon enough anyway. I mean, it's happening at Hogwarts —"

"Ludo, we need to meet the Bulgarians, you know," Mr. Crouch replied sharply. "Thank you for the tea, Weatherby."

"See you all later!" Bagman said once he got up. "You'll be up in the Top Box with me — I'm commentating!"

"What's happening at Hogwarts, Dad?" said Fred. "What were they talking about?"

"You'll find out soon enough," said Mr.Weasley, a knowing smile.

"It's classified information, until such time as the Ministry decides to release it," said Percy, clearly dying to talk about it. "Mr. Crouch was quite right not to disclose it."

"Oh shut up, Weatherby," Fred rolled his eyes.

"Mum, do you know?" Mel asked.

"Molly mentioned it a few days back," Emily sighed. "Clearly, I'll keep it a secret. I won't be the one who ruins the surprise. However, I assure you I'm not entirely happy about it."

"Why's that?"

Emily just shook her head.

"You'll find out soon enough," She insisted, taking a sip of her tea.

Next Chapter —>

Taglist.

@tiphareth2018​ @vampiregirl1797​ @siriuslysirius1107​ @stardusthigh​ @vernon-dursley​ @kylosleftbuttcheek​ @tomshollandz​ @bloodorangemoonlight​ @thesuitelifeofafangirl​ @reverse-hxlland​ @omiwashere​

[balkanradfem]

okay so the most garden ladies are nice but there's two women who just hate me because I'm a disobedient little goblin and I am kinda enjoying it bc it's nice to be hated without any real potential for harm.

The lady gardening right next to me, she has some very fixed ides about how things should be done and is sure that she Knows BestTM and gives me directions about how I HAVE TO garden, or else it will all fail for me, according to her. I come in that garden filled with ideas I found on youtube and online articles and literally do nothing the "right way".

Recently she's been criticizing my every move, apparently my idea to plant potatoes far apart to save them from bugs will actually cause my tomatoes to get eaten by potato bug, my soil is just "not good enough" and I'm doing it wrong by mulching so much (I'm the only one who mulches), I'm never throwing slugs away far enough (I walk like half a mile before throwing them in the wilderness but she wants me to kill them instead and I don't kill animals), and I'm wrong for making my own choices abt where to plant things.

We had a conversation about "no dig garden" a while ago and she heard about it and thought it was stupid and impossible. I shrugged and kept piling up composted leaves, straw, hay and mulch on my garden, until the first few level of topsoil was just compost I didn't need to dig thru it to plant anymore. She noticed and I think it rubbed her very wrong I just barged in there with zero experience, achieved good soil out of dense clay and don't even have to dig anymore, while doing the exact opposite of what she's been telling me to do. So she's trying to prove to me that it "actually sucks" because "there's still clay underneath" but every single plant has been doing well, I barely have any weeds to pull out and my top soil doesn't get damaged by sun, wind or any bad weather, actually it's insulated by straw so temperature changes wont affect roots.

She was also one of the people to tell me I "can't grow broccoli myself, I have to buy transplants" and said it over and over and then I grew them myself and they were big and fed me for months. My ego has been feeling very good about it. I think maybe hers isn't doing so well, but you know?? If your pride depends on a rando not doing as you say and succeeding... you gotta deal with that lmao. Kudos for sticking to tradition but I'm gonna use every new discovery about gardening to succeed and will ignore all of "advice" that is just a poorly disguised attempt to scare me into thinking I'm doing things wrong by refusing to obey. Had enough of that from abusive parents.

Another lady who hates me is an elderly lady with a weird vibe, literally tried to order me around the second she met me, and I was to assume it was "for my own good". My disobedient ass would die out of spite before being ordered around for anyone's good. I was sitting down in the grass as it's one of my happiness activities and she got behind me and went "Get up." And I play into assuming she means well and explain, No, this cannot harm me, I am perfectly content, did this all my life, wont get sick. And she wont accept it. She told me to get up 5 times, very aggressively, before I finally went "You're going to have to bring in 20 people to carry me. Nobody can force me." And the fact I had to go that far to get her off my case alarms me. What kind of self-justified do you have to be to insist on controlling a person you just met! She wouldn't even look at me after that. I am also enjoying that bc I managed to repel that particular bad vibe away from myself. I heard her ask crazy invasive questions to other ladies and they answer! What a crazy thing to do.

I still have to say, their conversation methods are far advanced to what m*n have been saying, apparently if they're walking by me working they expect a conversation and this is their starters: "Is it growing? What is that? Are you gardening? What are you doing? Is that doing well?" And I'm literally.. like what.. do you want me to say??? The plant is RIGHT THERE YOU CAN SEE ITS DOING WELL. IT IS OBVIOUSLY GROWING. ITS A FCKING SUNFLOWER. I AM OBVIOUSLY GARDENING. It's lower than toddler level communication. They will just throw the "blarafgbdsdfg tell me things like I'm a baby" and expect me to play along. THESE ARE ALL OLD CREEPS. And I just refuse to look at them until they go away. One of them dared to go "hey babe" at me and got the "we will not talk further" and withdrew.

I can't differentiate between them bc they all say equally idiotic shit so I have no clue how many are there. Some of them stare from a distance and I ignore them, then come closer and ask me shit, like I was just pulling up grass today and a creepy guy was like "are you pulling up grass?" like oh my god, I'm supposed to deal with that???? I'm supposed to act like this is a thing a person older than 2 can say to me??? and if I say "no, I'm cleaning the chimney" they think I'm making a joke and not telling them they're being stupid! god... it feels like being predated on every single time, thats the only reason why they don't feel like fucking idiots and don't care just how horrible they are at socialization or how much they're embarrassing themselves and obviously annoying me by saying stupid shit at me, it's only because they're never trying to start up a conversation, they're just there to force a prey to react to them, I'm the amusement, the fact that I have to listen to most idiotic shit said on earth is the amusement. I need the goddess of soil to open up the earth and swallow them whole every time they feel like opening their disgusting mouths in my direction.

I know I went against everyone in this post but listen, these two ladies, we hate each others as equals, there is no predator-prey stuff going around, there is no "me being afraid to retaliate" when they're telling me stuff I don't want to be hearing, I never  worry they'll trample my plants, I never have to be self-conscious of what I'm doing when they're watching me, I never once felt any danger or chance of violence while talking to them. I don't dislike their hatred because I'm still human in their eyes, and I can repel their entitlement with a bit of harsh words. For m*n tho? Nothing will ever repel their entitlement. Nothing will make them go after ther own business. Nothing they ever said to me regarded me as an equal or a human being. I was approached as a toy and nothing more. And even though all I want is for them to turn around, leave, and never look at me again, it's not safe to ask for it, nor would I get that. In fact, them knowing just how badly I want to be left alone will make it more amusing to invade in my presence, to rid me of pleasure of gardening in peace. It's not safe to do anything but pretend to be a boring rock they can't get any amusement from, and wait for them to leave. That's what you have to do when a goddamn bear attacks you. I hate it so much. I need to be growing my food in a space with no human predators. Mean ladies still invited. I will not listen to them tho.

[in-tua-deep]

are y’all ready for a showerthoughts au?? a little brain wiggle that decided to invade my brain once water hit by body?? well buckle up kids bc here we have a bizarre au where five both is and isn’t the main character

SO we start with the premise that, when Five worked for the Commission, he had health checks and doctors visits and all that. In the comics he was genetically experimented on and his aging is halted, but I don’t think they’re going that way in the TV show bc young actors age

but my whole point is: they probably have samples of Five’s genetic materials

(disclaimer: i am not a scientist and don’t know how any of this stuff works)

and wouldn’t it be so useful to have trained and loyal soldiers with the same ability to jump in space and time who are completely molded to your will? Isn’t that a brilliant idea? In this au, the Handler definitely thought so (and if she had grand plans to eventually sick her new assassins on Five and give him the shock of his life, well that’s too bad isn’t it)

except it doesn’t entirely work. Five’s DNA is actually kind of unstable? From his space jumps and time jumps, every time they attempt to clone him it fails and they end up with nothing. They keep tweaking things, but they have a limited supply of usable genetic material and they rack up failures. They almost give up when one child finally, finally, succeeds and makes it through the fetal stages and takes his very first breath surrounded by breathless scientists who are whooping and hollering in joy

They don’t name him. He’s a weapon. But they refer to him as ‘The Boy’ and the Handler is so tickled pink by the comparison with Five’s hero name that she refuses to name him anything else, even a project name or experiment number.

The Boy grows up. He’s trained. He goes through grueling training to become the perfect assassin, with the Handler standing over his shoulder and smiling the whole while - likely imagining the day he would be old enough to take down her original nemesis. 

And Boy doesn’t know anything else. He grows up, and he ends up getting sent with other agents on missions. Sometimes as a prop, a child helping them blend in and get closer to a target, and sometimes as the assassin. 

The theory is that raising him in isolated Commission environment, without siblings to care about, without a world to care about, he will be perfect.

(They shouldn’t have sent him on missions.)

He knows something isn’t right. He knows something is missing. He gets check ups every week until he’s six and then it becomes every month. And scientists talk. They marvel at his stability where ‘the others’ failed. He knows he isn’t the first child they tried to make.

And for whatever reason, the idea that at some point he wasn’t alone is an important one. And he’s curious. He wants to know about the other children who failed, the ones who didn’t make it, the ones who were his siblings. It’s an idle curiosity, of a child who went on missions and saw families and recognized something that he didn’t have.

He’s perfect. He was raised in the Commission. There’s no reason to believe he’ll defect, because there’s nothing for him to defect to. His entire life is the Commission. 

(Sometimes, the Handler takes his face in her hands. Her nails dig into his cheeks in he tries to look away and so he doesn’t, standing perfectly still with a thousand yard stare. Sometimes, she calls him ‘five point two’ with a delighted smile and he doesn’t know what that means.)

No one expects him to rebel even a little bit, and really picking the locks on the record room and reading old logs barely counts. 

(He can’t jump, not in the building. The first thing that the Commission did is figure out a way to sense when he jumps. They can’t figure out where he goes, but they know when it happens. If he jumps unauthorized, his punishments are severe. Hence: the lock picking.)

He wants to find records of his siblings, of the experiments and the failures. He wants to know how many came before him.

Instead, he finds a photo of himself. Except not quite. It’s him but older, obviously taken from a security camera and cropped. It’s an incident report, which shouldn’t be filed here. Something that slipped through the cracks. He reads the report, and his eye catches on the name. Five. Status: Unknown, the report proclaims, but it’s an old report.

The Boy’s first thought is not that Five is the original. Because the Boy has been around long enough to know what normal names are like, and as an experiment it would make sense for them to be named numbers, experiment numbers. The Boy doesn’t look at the picture and think that’s where I came from.

Instead, he looks at it and he thinks - brother. 

He thinks that he wasn’t the first success that the Commission had with jumping kids. He looks at the teen in the photo and thinks that Five is another Commission experiment. And the Boy is so lonely. He tucks the picture up his shirt with care.

He scours through the rest of the piles for any information on this Five, but comes up empty handed. The report with the original mention was filed incorrectly, he wasn’t supposed to see it at all. But the report didn’t say deceased, didn’t say mission closed or objective complete or anything like that. It said that Five’s status was unknown. Which meant he escaped. Which meant he might still be out there.

The Boy might have family that was alive. 

He keeps his knowledge close to his heart. He breaks into every records room he can get his hands on. But the Handler was thorough in her classifying of Five’s existence (until the time was right to kill him, of course) and the Boy doesn’t find another hint for a long time.

And then, like magic, he does. He’d been looking through old reports and, on a whim, decided to look at the newer ones. There was a mission to kill someone in a city in 2019, and there was a special note to be careful and extra covert because former agent Five was known to be hostile to Commission Agents.

Which meant that Five was alive. And that he was in that city. In 2019. The Boy had a time and a place and a date and, for the first time, hope. 

In the end, it’s a crime of opportunity. He’s sent on a mission with an older agent who is mean. The older man is unimpressed with being assigned to, in his words, babysit a child. So it’s maybe a tiny bit vindictive when the Boy grabs the suitcase and jumps, leaving the man behind and stumbling out into an alley in a city he’s never seen before. 

He destroys the suitcase, knowing it can be used to track him. And maybe he was a bit impulsive - because it’s a big city and there’s only one of him and he has no idea where to start looking. 

But luck is on his side, because the Boy has been living homeless for weeks trying desperately to keep under the Commission’s radar (it helps that they tread carefully as well, unwilling to draw attention to themselves) while also looking for his one family connection. And he’s squatting illegally in a building, and he gets busted.

And he’s tired, and exhausted, and hungry, and jumping right now is a terrible idea. He could kill the officer with ease, but that would draw even more attention to him and just. Ugh.

But he’s taken to the station, and there’s a woman there who blinks at him and says - “Five? What are you doing here?”

And all the Boy can do is blink stupidly at her. 

The woman, Detective Patch her desk says, sighs deeply at him and shakes her head. She waves off the officer who brought the Boy in, “I’ll call Diego. What they hell were you doing in that abandoned building?”

“Uh - ” The Boy tries, because she asked him a question, but words are escaping him right now. This woman thinks he is Five. This woman knows Five. His brain is running at a million miles a minute and this is the best lead he’s had since he landed here and somehow he can do nothing but stare at her with wide eyes. 

“Never mind.” Detective Patch says, pinching the bridge of her nose, “I’m sure I don’t want to know. Just sit tight a minute, okay?”

His body moves on autopilot to sit down, used to obeying orders and never questioning them. Even so, he’s almost vibrating in place in excitement.

The detective is on the phone. The detective nods. The detective hangs up.

“Someone will be by to pick you up in a minute.” She informs him, “Don’t go traumatizing my coworkers in the meantime, you hear? You know where the bathroom is if you need it.”

The Boy does not, but it’s easy enough to figure out. He ends up staring at himself in the mirror, and quite frankly he looks like hell. He’s been homeless for weeks, and while he’s better off than many due to his skills as a thief it’s still not great. And he’s about to meet Five, his family. He has to look presentable! He runs the faucet and scrubs at the dirt on his face and runs his hands through his hair to try and look presentable. It doesn’t really work, but it’s the best he’s going to get.

By the time he comes out, there’s a man standing at Detective Patch’s desk. He’s wearing all black and has - knives? The sight automatically makes the Boy wary. But surely a Commission agent wouldn’t be so obvious? The Detective sees him, and the man turns to follow her eyes.

He has a scar on the side of his head, the Boy observes. He wonders where he got it. 

“I don’t have time to be bailing your ass out, Five!” The man barks, and he sounds angry. The Boy can’t help the flinch - it’s never good when adults are angry with him. It always leads to more pain. The man tracks the small movement and frowns.

But he does soften just a little bit. “C’mon.” He says, still gruff. “Klaus is waiting in the car.”

The Boy doesn’t know who Klaus is, but if following the man will get him closer to Five then he’s going to do it regardless of personal discomfort. The scarred man goes around to the drivers side, and the Boy is left hovering uncomfortably between the passenger and backseat door.

He hasn’t been told where he’s allowed to sit.

“Don’t worry!” The man in the back, presumably the Klaus that was mentioned, hollers through the door, “Ben’s good wherever!”

And yeah, that makes even less sense and the Boy still doesn’t know what to do.

Thankfully the scarred man rolls his eyes, “Just get in the back.” 

The Boy does so, sitting gingerly on the leather seat and trying not to stare at either of the two strangers who now have him inside an enclosed space. The glittery man, Klaus, looks towards the empty passenger seat with a confused crease to his eyes.

“What happened, Five?” The scarred man asks bluntly as he pulls out.

The Boy... doesn’t know how to answer that either. He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out even though he was asked a direct questions. 

“You have... an episode?” The man asks almost gently, tiptoeing around his phrasing like a man afraid of setting off a live grenade. The Boy is sure it would have been helpful, if he knew what the fuck the man was talking about to begin with. As it is, he’s even more confused. 

Klaus coos softly, looking concerned from what the boy can see of his reflection in the window. Not knowing how to respond, he stays silent. Clearly though, that means something to both of the men because the scarred one nods and they both drop it. 

They pull up outside a big house. Both men get out of the car, and look confused when the Boy stays in place. He hasn’t been given permission to exit the vehicle yet though, so he’s not sure why they look concerned. These two aren’t very good Handlers, he hopes they’re not the ones in charge of Five. 

“Uh,” The scarred one clears his throat, “We’re home dude. C’mon.”

That’s about as much of an order as he’s going to get around here, probably. And if the scarred man says that we’re home, including who he assumes is Five in that sentence, then that means - his search is over?

Suddenly eager, he jumps in a flash of blue over to the door. It’s not allowed, and immediately icy shock goes down his spine and his brain is alight with anxiety, but nothing happens. He’s not in the Commission. They can’t track his jumps outside of it. 

Before he can spiral further into panic, the door is opened and he’s being swept inside. It’s big. It’s really big. 

“Is that you, Diego?” Someone calls from within the house, “Dinner’s almost ready! Five said he’s gonna be late - ”

A woman emerges from a room, a towel in her hands. She’s tall, is the first thing the Boy notices about her. Her hair is curly - he likes it. 

“Patch called me.” The scarred man - Diego? - informs the woman, who immediately frowns at the Boy. He hunches his shoulders in a little. “I think he had an episode or something, I dunno. He’s acting weird.”

Somehow or another he’s ushered into the kitchen. There’s even more people in there. There’s a lot of people in this house. There’s another woman, who is short and mousy. She gives him a small smile when he enters. There’s a man as well, tall and broad and scary looking. The Boy tries not to look him in the eyes.

There’s fussing and suddenly everyone is sitting down at the table except for the Boy. 

He shuffles his feet, and all eyes are on him, and he has to speak he has to. He’s here. It’s important. He hasn’t been asked a question, but the other homeless people didn’t hurt him for talking, so. It’s a risk he’s going to have to take.

“Uh,” He says, voice small and eyes darting around the room, “Where’s - I mean. Where’s Five?”

“What do you mean where’s Five?” Klaus exclaims, looking confused. Everyone is looking confused. 

“I want - uh, I’d like to meet him. If he’s here.” The Boy stumbles, and he knows it’s a misstep to says words like want and like but it’s the truth.

The scarred man has slowly put his hand to the knives still strapped to his body, looking especially alert. It kind of makes the Boy want to run in the opposite direction, “Are you saying you aren’t Five?”

“He jumped from the car!” Klaus protests, looking from a single point in thin air to the Boy and back again. Which means that Five can also jump? The idea that someone else has the exhilarating and terrifying ability to jump is somehow an incredible relief to the Boy. He’s not alone. Klaus looks the Boy directly in the eye with an intensity that has the Boy’s eyes darting away, “Are you having an episode right now?”

A few people at the table nod their heads as if agreeing but that’s not what the Boy wants. He’s so close. He shuffles his feet again. 

“I’m - I’m sorry. For not telling you at the station.” He finally offers, “Detective Patch called me Five, and then she called you, and just - please.” The sorry made them look alarmed but it’s the please that really gets everyone attention and Diego has drawn a knife that he holds loosely in his hand. 

There’s a flash of blue off to the side and suddenly the Boy is looking in a mirror and his mirror image stiffens in alarm. Another small flash and his doppelganger has a knife in his hand as well, face twisted into a snarl.

“Who the hell are you?” The boy who must be Five bites out.

The Boy’s eyes dart around the room. Everyone’s standing now, moving automatically to stand behind Five, recognizing him as the real deal. 

“I’m - I’m the Boy.” The Boy says, and the fact that all of the faces react in a weird way make the Boy wonder what that’s all about. “I think - I think you’re my brother?”

Well that sets the cat among the chickens.

It takes a while, but eventually they all gather in the living room and the Boy is sat on one of the comfortable couches and Five is across from him peppering him with questions.

“You - you came from the Commission, too, right?” The Boy interrupts hesitantly.

Five frowns, “Sort of. Not in the way you did, I imagine. I worked for the Commission.”

The Boy nods, and pulls out the picture that he kept. The one with security footage and the very first inkling that he might not be so terribly alone in the world. Five plucks the picture out of his hands, and the Boy pretends it doesn’t give him anxiety. 

“The report said status: unknown.” The Boy tells Five as if he doesn’t already know, but the nerves keep the words coming. “Which means - which meant you didn’t die. They always told me I was the only one that survived but - but they lied! You’re here! You’re like me!”

“I don’t understand.” The big man - Luther, apparently - says, crossing his arms. The Boy almost forgot he was there for a moment (stupid) and flinches. “Where did the new Five come from?”

Five shrugs, “Alternate timeline, maybe? Steal me as a baby and raise me as a Commission weapon?”

The Boy blinks. Does Five not know? Not know they were grown in a lab? Maybe Five never knew about the possibility of siblings?

“The Scientists grew us.” He tells the man, because if he has more information then he has to share it. “The - The DNA was uh, unstable though. ‘Cause of the jumping. So they kept failing. Except then they succeeded! They said I was the only success but they lied.”

There’s a heavy silence in the room.

It’s broken by Five, who looks at the Boy with a sort of softness that the Boy gets the feeling isn’t all that common. 

“They didn’t lie.” He tells the boy softly, as if he isn’t dismantling the Boy’s entire world view. “You said they had DNA, right? That DNA had to come from somewhere, right?”

The Boy processes that, and suddenly he can’t believe he was so stupid. Of course he had to come from somewhere. There had to be an original. And the Handler’s comments about five point two make a stupid amount of sense.

“But - ” The Boy stutters, shoulders hunching, “But your name is Five? That’s an experiment name.”

There’s some kind of reaction going on in the background, but the Boy only has eyes for Five, his - his original?

Five just nods, “I wasn’t a Commission experiment, but the man who took me and raised me - he didn’t think of me as a person, either. And when I worked for the Commission, they were - interested in my abilities.”

So the Commission stole an experiment. Tried to recreate an experiment they didn’t own. The Boy was a copy of something that wasn’t supposed to belong to the Commission in the first place.

“I came from you.” The Boy says, slowly, looking at his feet as he turns the thought around in his head. “Does - does that make us... still family?”

There’s a heavy silence.

It makes the Boy nervous enough to just blurt out his thoughts. “I don’t - I don’t want to go back! They’re scared of you. Please, I won’t bother anybody - you won’t even know I’m here, I promise.”

Because that report had told the agents to be wary, to be careful, to not cross Number Five. The Commission didn’t mess with Five, and if the Boy stayed close then that meant they probably wouldn’t try get him back, right?

Suddenly there’s a weight next to him and an arm slung over his shoulder and he’s still as a board as he whips his head to look around at - Klaus?

“Aw kid,” Klaus coos at him, and even though the proximity is weird it’s also kind of nice? Klaus squeezes his arm and for some reason it doesn’t feel like a threat. “We’re not gonna make you go back, right guys?” Everyone mumbles their agreement, though Five stays silent.

“You’re Five-o’s clone, right? And if Five’s family that automatically gives you a free pass as family as well!” Klaus grins, “I know you only expected one sibling, but mi familia es su familia, ey?”

And somehow, that’s that. It’s agreed that the Boy gets to stay and there’s a flurry of activity and somehow throughout it all Five sticks around just enough to ease a little bit of the Boy’s anxiety. 

It’s not going to solve the Commission problem, and every time the Boy brings up something about his life at the Commission or is confused about something mundane the family’s heart break a little bit more, but honestly their entire family existence has been a wild roller coaster of a ride so this might as well happen

and if Five is furious enough at the highkey violation of getting an unauthorized clone and decided that maybe it’s time once and for all to get rid of the Commission well. Dismantling a shady government organization is practically what passes for family bonding to them all, right?

[cillianmurphy]

ocean eyes

I wrote this small story a few weeks ago and the response @robertdowneys​ gave me made me cry so I am putting it here under cut. It is, obviously, based on Billie’s ‘Ocean Eyes’ (bold are song lyrics) and is my first piece of creative writing after 2.5 years, so if u have feedback pls let me know. It’s gender neutral btw <3 I am very nervous to put my writing out here and I can only hope whoever reads it, likes it <3

warning: extreme fluff, sad ending (death tw)

best read on desktop bc of post formatting!

-

I've been watching you  For some time

It was as if time stood still. Under the dazzling lights on the ceiling, also named the starry sky, you slowly moved throughout the crowd. With every step, people moved aside to let you pass through them. Seconds seemed like hours as you approached the person who had caught your eyes years before.  

Four years.

It had been four long years since your now betrothed caught your attention. You don’t know when your feelings for them had surfaced, but you did know they had your heart from the day you met them. For years you wished they would return the feelings you held for them. It was a drunkenness of the soul. You swore nothing came close to the feeling of being in love with the one person who would hold the key to your soul for the rest of eternity. An addiction was nothing compared to the feeling of being in love; it was intoxication.  

Can't stop staring At those oceans eyes

You don’t know why you fell in love with them. Maybe it was because of their courage, their loving heart or maybe that smile. That damned smile. Love works in mysterious ways and you don’t think you would ever know what exactly made you fall helplessly for your other half. They turned your dreams into reality; made your heart feel things you could not begin to comprehend. Your souls were tied to one another with a fierce grip, incapable of letting go of each other for even a second.  

As you approached your lover, you took a moment to take in their beauty. They were smiling gently, a smile reserved for you and you only. The tiny dimples at the edge of their lips, luscious and full. The lights of the ballroom glistened in their eyes; pinpricks of the gold above dancing in an orderly fashion.  

Those eyes.

They were beautiful beyond belief. The way the world reflected in them; you swore it made your knees weak. The colours of the iris mixed in the most exquisite way possible, caught your attention and pulled you in whenever you sneaked a glance towards your lover. It should be a criminal offence to have such mesmerising eyes, you thought. They held you captive and even if you were able to pull away, you didn’t want to. You wanted to get lost in them for hours on end.

And now, maybe now you knew why you fell in love with them in the first place. Their eyes were the windows to their soul, and they captivated you from the first glance, holding you hostage. They were the last thing you saw when you slept and the first when you woke up. When you looked in them, you saw forever. You sought comfort, love, peace in their dazzling eyes. They soothed you, words were rarely necessary.  

It was their eyes you fell in love with. And then the rest of them followed.

Burning cities And napalm skies

They held out their hand, waiting for yours. Slowly, you lifted your hand up to meet theirs and a shock of electricity went through your body. It was if your entire life with your fiancé flashed past your eyes. The good, the bad. Everything you had experienced with them, came back to you in the most intoxicating fashion. You remembered the moments where you woke up next to them, the peaceful mornings. How they dragged you off on adventures you could not begin to imagine before they took place. How you forced them to see the lighter side of life and stuck by them through the bad times, as they did for you.

Alas, life isn’t just full of good times. Like any relationship, bad times had fallen on you as well. Life isn’t always exquisite roses, sometimes it is thorns as well. Unfortunately, all love and hope could be ripped apart when you experienced just one inconvenience. It pained you to even admit it but you two had come so close to losing one another due to general stubbornness. It scared you, losing them. They were your better half, the person who had your heart and would own it for the rest of eternity. And you were theirs. You could not afford to lose one another, because once you did, there would be a gaping void in your soul, unable to be filled by even the most priceless of treasures.

Because they were your most priceless treasure, as you were theirs.  

Fifteen flares inside those ocean eyes Your ocean eyes

‘Y’know … all these people are staring at us and we both know we can’t dance.’

You scoffed at their words, but they were true. Weeks of dance practice had gone by, yet it was as if you forgot all you had been taught. In your defence it wasn’t your fault, you were just reeling at the feeling of your lover’s touch on your skin. The feather light touch of their fingers gently held your waist in place whilst their arm was snaked around you. The other hand stroked your cheek with the utmost care, as if you were a porcelain doll that could break at the slightest touch. Their touch made every rational thought within you bubble away and all you could possibly focus on was them.

Only them.

Nothing else was needed. Even in the crowded ballroom, it was just you and them against the world. Whisking you through the room, they twirled you away from them, yet you were still so close. All that time, their eyes on yours. Nothing else mattered. It was just the two of you, and that’s the way it was meant to be. 

No fair You really know how to make me cry When you gimme those ocean eyes

This was supposed to be a happy day. A happy day, without any feelings of sadness. But if it was so happy, why were you crying, your lover thought. Did they do something wrong? Did they accidentally step on your feet whilst dancing? Damn it, they knew they should’ve gotten the shoes that didn’t have a sturdy heel. Another tear slipped from your eye and they wiped it away with their sleeve, looking into your eyes and voicing the concerns they had, without words.

‘I’m fine, I just,’

An unsteady gasp crossed your lips as your chest shook. You were unable to keep your tears from falling. You felt yourself stop moving and warm hands placed themselves on your cheeks, their nose rubbing yours. You felt them wipe your tears away as they held you close. More sobs wracked your body and you shuddered in their touch. They were so warm, so why on earth did you feel so cold? Their eyes, those eyes, looked down at you in worry and you felt so selfish. They thought they had done something wrong when it was the complete opposite.

They could do no wrong. They were your angel, sent down from the heavens. Well, a faulty angel, but an angel, nonetheless.  

‘I never thought I would have this moment. And feel so loved.’ you stated, looking up at them. And it was true. You never thought you were capable of being loved in the way you were now. The insecurities piled up over several years and though you tried to convince yourself you weren’t what others deemed you, you couldn’t help it.

Unlovable, ugly, not suitable.

They had taken their toll on you and you believed everything they said about you were true, until you met the person who convinced you that you were not. The person who currently held your hand with their larger one, kissing your knuckles lightly, their eyes not leaving yours. Their eyes brimmed with tears, as they knew what you were talking about in great detail. They knew every insecurity; every worry, and they’d be damned before they ever let you think about yourself in such a degrading way again.  

Grabbing your sides gently, they whisked you away again. The two of you danced for what felt like an eternity, until you stopped. They pulled you closer to them and tried to show all their love for you through their eyes. And you’d be a liar if you said they didn’t succeed.  

I'm scared I've never fallen from quite this high Falling into your ocean eyes Those ocean eyes

Everything would be alright. The rest of the night was spent in a blur, dancing to the gentle beat of the music, and most of it you spent staring into their eyes. They soothed you, made you calm down and made you feel so loved. Who needed ‘I love you’s’ in words when the same message could be conveyed through eyes? Eyes were the windows to the soul, and you saw your lover’s soul glistening through their eyes, and it was blinding; intoxicating. Those eyes told you that, yes, hard times would come and go, but good times would outnumber them. They comforted you and made you forget your insecurities and doubts. They made you feel whole; complete in unimaginable ways. A cluster of a thousand stars wouldn’t be able to generate the light and warmth that coursed through your body when you looked at their eyes.

Their ocean eyes.  

I've been walking through A world gone blind Can't stop thinking of your diamond mind

Good times don’t last. Surely everyone knew that? Life is unpredictable and so unfair. There were a multitude of awful people the world who could’ve been taken away. People who were a disgrace to humanity. People who did not deserve to walk the earth.

So why them?

Why the one person who had so much love to give and asked for nothing in return? Why the one person who made you feel loved and whole? Why them? Why?

The day your lover died in a car crash, your world died with it. There was no reason to live anymore. You always selfishly hoped that you would be the one to die first. That way you would not have to feel the pain of your soulmate dying.

And what a pain it was.

You had heard childbirth was the worst pain on earth. Every mother you met confirmed this. But this? Losing your loved one; your other half to such a cruel fate, was it really less of a pain than pushing a kid out?

It wasn’t, you concluded.  

Because that pain would ease and slowly become nothing. Not having the person you were dependant on, to love you anymore, to help you out of the dark void, it was a pain that tore at your soul, ripping it apart into hundreds of fragments, unable to be repaired.  

Careful creature Made friends with time He left her lonely with a diamond mind And those ocean eyes

‘You know I’ll never leave you sweetheart.’ They once said, after you voiced your concerns. Your initial fears, that you were unlovable, had risen again and you had been harbouring those feelings for so long. At one point you were scared that they would see you for the broken person you were and realise they were wrong in loving you.

‘Promise?’ You sniffled, extending your pinky finger towards them. They laughed, what a beautiful laugh and nodded, wrapping their finger around yours and what they said next made you laugh at their fandom references, which were in abundance.  

‘Pinky promise meleth nin.’  

--

They lied, you sobbed. They lied. They promised they wouldn’t leave you but here you were, gaping hole in your heart. Nothing would ever soothe the pain you felt, for only they could, but they left. They broke their promise. Why was life so cruel? It was a curse to be left on this cold earth, so empty of love after their departure. Your soul broke in two every day and you tried, oh you tried to soothe yourself by thinking of the one thing that soothed you all those years before.

Their ocean eyes.

END

Note: meleth nin means ‘my love’ in elvish (hobbit reference)

[glasyasbutch]

Oh, do you want some angst this week? is that what you want? alright bud let's go!! 1, 3, 7, and 28 for whoever has the Most Interesting Answers!!

Thank you for sending this in!!! Under a read more both bc Prose Boy but also because the first question ended up becoming a short story with some themes of body horror in it so! look out!

1. What’s one experience your character had that made them very afraid?

I rolled amongst the characters I haven’t already discussed in depth later in this ask and got Roona. Lovely.

Being a person with near zero impulse control and a penchant for doing it just because someone said not to, I think at some point while barding alone on the road, she ended up in one of those small towns with a big secret that pop up in the thousands in D&D. 

One of those places where there’s a house on the outskirts of town with the windows all locked up and the front gate rusted shut, but it’s not dilapidated, and if you listen close enough there’s still voices drifting out through the cracks. And if you ask about it in the tavern, the room falls silent and no one’s gaze is meeting yours and after a tense few seconds the bartender slides you a too-full glass and tells you “You best be forgetting about that place, it won’t do you any good.”

And you want to know so badly what happened there and every answer you get is vague until the coin purse comes out, and then the hushed whispers come out too and you start to hear things about how the family that used to live there would collect all kinds of artifacts, and one day they imported something horribly cursed, and it’s probably still inside, it’s got to be, because no one’s ever been seen leaving with it, and anyone who goes to get it back walks away with blood-drained face and shut mouth. 

And so you try to sleep at night but you can’t, because you’re thinking about this fucked up house, and you’ve been to enough roadside tourist traps to know that the value’s in the show, and terror and wonder are almost the same emotion, and you’re pretty sure that this is just some long con publicity stunt that some recluse rich ass family is pulling, because rich people are fucking weird like that. And you’re not gonna call them on it, but you’d like to see for yourself, just to know if your hunch is right. 

So you sneak over there in the dark of night, and you hop the fence and press your eye to the shutters of the living room, and you curse your short legs that you don’t have the best of angles, but you’re still able to make out movement inside the place, and you can see the figures milling about in profile, but it’s hard to make out since the lights are off, which granted, is a little bit weird. 

But you squirm and shimmy and hoist yourself up by the window ledge and you’re still looking through the slats the whole time and you’re trying to see, you can almost get the right angle of your head and the moonlight to make out something of worth in the room, you just need to get a little bit higher and -

And you kick the side of the house and it reverberates much more than it has any right to, though that could just be the adrenaline pumping in your veins, but it really feels like the whole house has shaken, and the figures in the room all freeze in place, which is a bit worrying, but you don’t see them looking at you, which is almost a relief. 

But they are looking at you. The longer you sit and wait for them to go back to their business, the more you realize they’re waiting for you to leave. They can tell you’re here and you’re not supposed to be, so everything comes crashing to a halt, and they’re looking at you, so you know that you’re the disruption. 

But you didn’t realize until now that’s what they were doing, because they don’t have faces. It’s smooth skin, no sign even of eye sockets or cheek bones or nose bridges, just blank skin, like a mannequin come to life, but even with nothing there you can still feel them staring and you want to run away as fast as you can but you’re too scared too move. 

You become scared enough to move again once one of them begins to move towards the window that you’re at, and you hop the fence once more and high tail it back to the inn, hand on the hilt of your sword the whole while. And you slip back into your bed and wish you’d heeded the warnings to stay away, because even though you checked over your shoulder a thousand times to make sure they didn’t follow you, it still feels like the lack of eyes is staring right at you from the dark of every corner in your room. 

And you don’t sleep well again until you’re miles away from that town. 

3. Have they ever lost a loved one? What happened to them, and are they the same as before they lost them? 

These are d&d characters and I’m a tragedy slut so long answer short, yes, approximately half of my characters have key backstory moments revolving around the death/betrayal of a loved one.  Craving, Tov, Stella, Ezra are Supremely Emo, with Gildy and Nissy being lesser versions but still fitting the prompt.

Craving: Her entire life has been a series of deep losses that fundamentally changed the way she grew up. First person she lost was her mother, Kaissa, who died of a mysteriously incurable illness and whose public autopsy was revoked by the city for reasons no one could figure out. It broke her trust in authority, in public figures. The medical sector had refused to treat her mother and then hidden the evidence, it was as good as murder, and she figured every seat of government had as much blood on their hands.

The second to go was her father, Anvan, one of the first victims of a plague that devasted the tiefling population of their city far worse than any other race. He died before a vaccine was developed, but it wouldn’t have mattered any ways, because it was distributed in a horribly biased fashion by the producers which benefitted the human populous first. Not only did this break her trust in money, as a tool for growth and prosperity and caused her to see wealth as possessions as a tool for cruelty (which, you might ask, doesn’t she want wealth? doesn’t she steal impulsively? yes. she does it to be cruel right back at the world.) BUT it also was the moment at which she really lost her youth, because with the death of her father, she had to go into working full time.

The last to go was her brother, Sirris. He was stabbed and burned to death in a hate crime attack on their store. She went into the back room that day as a broken but loving woman, and crawled out of the ashes dragging her brother’s body behind her as a hell-bent, rage-blind servant of eye for an eye retribution. She was going to tear this world down from the inside, and she is still barely starting to learn that there are some things that don’t deserve to be crushed in the wreckage. 

Tov: He went to the Shadowfell to get some sorcery powers and when he walked back out he did a little attempted murder on his brother, who funnily enough Did Not Like It, and cast Tov out of his clan and his life, out of everything he’d ever known. Tov stood on the shores as his brother boarded the boat home alone and the second the ship was out of sight, he became a shell of a man that he’s still trying to fill back in.

Stella: Her entire community got burned to the ground and only a handful of survivors made it out, and she had to go from balance-oriented hippie kid to Literal Fucking Assassin to survive so uh. She got lost in a world where she had to become mean and cold and emotionless in order to stay living, and if she’s being honest, made it a lot easier to deal with the fact that Literally her Entire Life was irreparably gone. 

Ezra: His sister died on a quest for his God, after being promised saving by his God, and failing to be resurrected by clerics of his God. It made him stop believing in God. Like that one’s super duper straightforward.

Gildy: Not nearly as emo, but her spouse passing of old age and leaving her alone in the house made her finally realize that her life is. Hers. And that’s it. And kicked off her quest to do things that actually interest her and get into 3D art and forging and eventually a lifestyle of travel and adventure in the name of her art. She focused on herself for the first time in her life and maybe its just it being 1 am but I am a little bit soft about how that deep deep loss of a spouse was a catalyst for one of the most unabashedly happy times in this woman’s life because she finally didn’t have to care about pleasing anyone but herself! Nissy: He eloped with his girlfriend and then got dumped by her and he realized he kind of sucked shit on his own and decided to go adventuring to prove himself about it. At the time I played him he was fresh out of the breakup so he hadn’t changed much, but I feel like by the time he gets back home he will actually be much more sure of himself as a person who has value and worth and deserves a place at the table as he is, because that’s what being with Mavy had started to teach him, and after she left he was able to internalize it better bc there was no external source to pass it off onto. 

7. If your character was allowed to murder one person without any consequences, who would it be and why? 

Stella would kill Geran, the man who caught her assassinating and promised her a clean wipe of her criminal record in return for a year of SUPREMELY sketch and manipulative personal guard work. She knows she can’t do anything to him because if she fails he turns her in himself, and if she succeeds one of his lackeys does, but he’s also an absolute creep and a sleazeball and she hates his guts and the world would be better off without his freakness in it. Hey actually Rebekah this guy would make a great fourth character for Ludo. 

28. What is your character’s greatest strength?  Is it not the essence of a queer person’s D&D game that every character’s greatest strength boils down to a unfathomably deep love and devotion to whatever persons or tasks they deem worthy?

[journey2maya]

Narratology: Second Draft

Analyse your chosen narrative with close reference to the Hero’s Journey or another appropriate template

For this essay I have chosen to talk about the narrative structure of the 2017 film My Little Pony: The Movie. I will be making a structural analysis with reference to the Quest plot type as described in Cristopher Booker’s The seven basic plots. [1] to paraphrase; in any quest story there is always a priceless goal which drives the hero’s passion to succeed. The hero and some companions must embark on a perilous journey filled with monsters, temptation and helpers, to reach their goal. The story is unresolved until the overriding objective has been secured.[Booker 2004 pg 69] I will be taking a look at how the animation enriches the narrative through choice of design and also touch on how the songs drive the narrative at certain points.

The movie was produced by DHX media in collaboration with AllSpark pictures using Toon Boom Harmony production software [2] which specialises in integrating 3D elements with 2D characters. [3] the film emphasises traditional animation and is supported throughout with modern 3-D solutions. The TV show is animated using flash and along with this change of animation software there also came a change in art style. To quote Art Director Rebecca Dart; for the feature film, the characters became more volumetric overall, meaning they have more of a roundness and softness for the 360 degree world of Equestria and beyond that we created for the movie.” [4] This extract from the ‘art of’ book shows a comparison of the two styles.

Figure 1. A style comparison. Page 20, 2017 [4]

These small changes really make the difference on the big screen and giving the ponies’ ears an inside fold allows the ears to swivel and be more expressive, closer to real life horse ears. The shimmer of the eyes also adds to the depth of emotion and these small changes are an example of how small changes really make the difference.

The plot of the movie is as follows; Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Rarity embark on an epic journey to save Equestria from the tyranny of the Storm King. Along the way, the Mane 6 meet new friends and face challenges as they travel beyond Equestria for the first time ever. From this summary we can pick out the key features of a quest story. The call; a sudden threat has arisen that gives purpose to a journey. [Booker, 2005 pg. 70] for this story it’s the threat of the Storm King.  The hero’s companions; Apple Jack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Rarity, along with the dragon assistant spike, accompany Twilight on her quest. The journey; the essential party of any quest story where our hero and their companions go through a series of terrible ordeals, receive help and guidance and are met with challenges they must overcome [Booker, 2005 pg. 73]. For the mane six this spans most of the movie. They go to a range of locations that play respective roles in pushing the narrative and I’ll be looking at each location in further detail. The helpers; characters that serve as an aid to the hero and her companions [Booker, 2005 pg. 77] ( the new friends they meet along the way) the helpers in this particular movie are quite important as they not only help during the journey but they also in what booker calls the ‘final ordeal’ it is the last battle between good and evil, where the hero comes to the edge of their goal [Booker,2005 pg. 78].

At the start of the film we see the ponies preparing for the first official Friendship Festival in Canterlot, Equestrias capital. Everywhere is bustling. The event is highly anticipated and each of the mane six are helping prepare by putting up decorations,and erecting tents and booths to sell many different wares through this we get introductions to our characters, including spike, to show a little of their personality. This is important because it makes the characters seem more real. They’re not just an accessory to Twilight's adventure, they’re individuals and they’re part of it in a big way.  Twilight Sparkle, the unofficial leader of the friend group, is being true to character and is worried that the festival won’t be perfect. As the Princess Of Friendship the pressure is all on her to make sure that everypony has a good time. Twilight’s friends rally around her in an attempt to reassure her that everything will be fine in the form of the song ‘We Got This Together.’

This song highlights the mane six’s teamwork and interpersonal relationship as strong. This Song also carries heavy foreshadowing as it implies that true to form, of a quest story, everything is certainty not going to go to plan but that the mane six will indeed face any problem together. However the genial atmosphere is cut with a knife when dark clouds loom over Canterlot, blackening the perfectly clear sky. Normally this wouldn’t be anything to worry about but in the lore of MLP, Pegasi ponies can control the weather. Twilight even gets frustrated because she “ordered perfect weather.” It’s a huge contrast to the previously established setting.

We are introduced to our first antagonist: Tempest Shadow. A jaded unicorn motivated by anger and a wish to be whole again. She is dedicated to being the Storm Kings Hench-pony and chief bounty hunter, all so he can retire her horn after she delivers on the promise to retrieve the magic of the four princesses for the Storm King’s use. Tempest is supposed to look different and like an outcast because it relates to her story arc and past. She has a darker palette than we would normally see which instantly makes her read as an antagonist. She doesn’t look like the other characters and we don’t know her so we shouldn’t trust her. A great example of changes the design department made were for the better.

Figure 2. Design concepts for ‘Cosmos’ as Tempest was originally going to be called.Pg 46 2017 [4]

Tempest asks for surrender which, of course he princesses refuse. This is when things go from bad to worse. An army of Storm creatures are revealed as their air ships emerge from the fog. They come down on Canterlot, capturing ponies who dare to flee.

Tempest turns Three of the  princesses,Celestia Luna and Cadence, into obsidian statues.

Figure 3. Cadence is about to be engulfed [5] 2017

Figure 3. Twilight saves Princess Luna from smashing to pieces [5] 2017

The final words of Princess Celestia, to her sister Luna, is to fly south and seek the help from the queen of the hippo…

She is unable to finish what she was going to say and Luna I’m unable to carry out the mission as they are both encased in an obsidian prison.Twilight is the only princess left and so, with her friends, they all make a daring escape over on of the waterfalls that make up Canterlots architecture. Unequivocally this is what Booker refers to as ‘the call’ [Booker, 2005 pg 70]] Tempest's arrival and disruption is the reason why the mane six must embark on the quest the Friendship Festival has gone terribly wrong and the stakes are high. Twilight and her friends have to make this journey to set things right. As said in Booker, ‘surrounded by an atmosphere of menace and construction, the Quest hero and her friends feel under intense compulsion to get away.” [Booker 2005, pg 71]  This is exactly what has happened to the mane six and we now have a definite goal- to save Equestria from the Storm King and Tempest Shadow.

The next stage, perhaps one of the most defining of a quest story that Christopher Booker has identified, which is certainly present in the movie, is that Twilight isn’t alone in the journey she has to take. Twilight is accompanied by her friends who each have their own virtues and abilities that contribute to the success of the adventure. Or to the detriment.

Pinkie pie is a particularly important part of Twilights company as she represents one of the 4 basic forms that a hero’s companion should be. A subtle alter-ego whose role is to serve as a foil, displaying qualities of the opposite of those shown by the hero.[Booker 2005 pg 72] for example in the ‘Epic Of Gilgamesh’ whenever Gilgamesh displays assets of courage and confidence it is Enkidu, his brother, who expresses fear and doubt. [Unknown, C.1800 BC tablet 2] In the MLP Movie when Twilight shows concern and worry, Pinkie Pie is only concerned about how much fun can be had and she derails the situation with her silly antics.

Through all the obstacles that the Mane 6 face. Their arrival in seaquestria is the most crucial. It is where Twilight is faced with one of the specific obstacles that Booker notes must be present. Twilight succumbs to a temptation. Seaquestria is the underwater world that the hippogriffs were forced to inhabit to hide from the Storm King. The Queen of the hippogriffs used a magic pearl to turn her subjects into sea ponies. Pinkie pie makes friends with Queen Novos daughter, Princess Skystar and Twilight realised that the pearl can transform the ponies of Canterlot into

An army that can defeat the Storm King however Novo refuses to give her it. The mane six go to leave but notice that Skystar is sad because her new friends are leaving. Twilight, surprisingly, encourages Pinkie pie to cheer her up with a song. When the song is finished we find out that this was just a ploy so everyone would be distracted whilst twilight tries to steal the pearl.

Figure 4. Twilight is tangled in the jellyfish cage that guards the pearl. [5] 2017

This leads to The mane six’s forced exit from seaquestria and more importantly Twilights downfall. Because Pinkie Pie was able to cram a lifetime of fun into one song the hippogriffs were going to give them the pearl as a thank you. Twilights lack of faith in her friends causes a big argument between her and Pinkie Pie which leaves twilight sitting alone on a greyscale beach. This makes her look even more isolated and alone as she is the only colourful thing in the scene. She is captured by Tempest who has been on the groups tail since the start. Tempest shares her backstory with Twilight. This gives us an insight into tempests motivation and creates a vulnerability in her. and she is taken back to Canterlot where we finally see the Storm King in full glory as he is able to steal the magic from all four princesses, channelling it through the staff of succannas, becoming omnipotent in the process. The Storm King casts Tempest aside, refusing to restore her horn as he had promised he would.

After Twilight is captured and left weak without her magic we get the last stage of a classic quest story; the final ordeal Where the heroes come to the edge of their great goal [Booker 2004 pg 78] Twilight’s friends engage in an epic battle against the storm creatures with the help of Skystar and some other friends they made on their journey. Near the end of the battle the staff creates a wretched Storm that takes Twilight, the Storm King and the staff away. Twilight's friends are of course distraught but this is the part in the story where our hero has her last ‘thrilling escape from death’ [Booker 2005 pg 83] and returns with the staff and settles the skies.

Unfortunately the fight isn’t over as the Storm King also survived the storm. it seems like he has the upper hand and is about to turn the mane six into obsidian statues. Tempest jumps in front of the mane six to save them, reforming  herself and pushing the Storm King over the edge so he smashes to pieces. The mane six save tempest and together the seven of them release the princesses and save equestria. Our hero Twilight has reached her goal and so the quest has ended.

This version was more focused but it was still too detailed. I took out the images that weren’t needed and I went in a slightly different direction. Choosing only to focus on one of the locations the mane six voyage to so I could focus on it more and make a more detailed and structured analysis. 

[depressed-sock]

How about some Sentinel and Anathema realising that Sidestep hasn’t ever had a plushie so going out of their way to find the fuzziest, plushiest, plushie possible for them to hug when things get rough or they need comfort or just bc (those 2 need more love and the way you wrote them in Thief was GOLD! First animal I thought of was a gerbil but honestly this one is up to what you think lol be the cutest!)

Good Things Happen Bingo

A Fallen Hero Fanfic

Plushie

Sentinel and Anathema looking for a plushie for Sidestep

 You thought today was going to be peaceful, maybe even relaxing but the way Anathema’s grinning at you tells you that those thoughts were incredibly wrong. You could ignore Themmy, just keep walking until you can fly far away from whatever it is they have planned. Like you did with the Gerbil movie nonsense but you don’t think Ortega and Steel could handle something like that on their own again. You’re supposed to be the older and responsible member… you really do not feel like any of you qualify as that.

 Well, maybe Steel might but it would be an overqualification that immediately disqualified him. You don’t think he knows the meaning of relax or if he does he hasn’t been able to do it for years.

 “Alright. What is it,” you don’t sound defeated, you do not sound defeated… maybe if you keep telling yourself that it’ll be true one day.

 “Sooo I was talking with Sidestep,” and this is already off to a terrible start. You hold up your hand immediately stalling any further words.

 “Anathema as fun as I’m sure it is, terrorizing our colleagues is not appropriate.”

 “Did you really just say colleagues,” they snort, trying to hold in their laughter.

 You sigh, crossing your arms, “You know what I mean.”

 “Yeah, yeah. Don’t worry this is something completely different,” they practically bounce in excitement, “Sidestep has never had a plushie.”

 That… you’re not sure what you expected but it certainly wasn’t that. “O..k?”

 “So it’s our job to get them one!”

 “…Our?” you look at them confused, “Wouldn’t you rather bring Ortega?”

 “Yeah right,” they roll their eyes, hands going to their hips, “Ortega would end up trying to buy out a store of toys and then only succeed in completely embarrassing Sidestep. Probably tease them mercilessly and don’t even suggest Steel,” the last part added quickly as they hold out a stern finger towards you. “Logistically we’re the best for this mission.”

 “…Alright, I see your point,” you sigh pinching the bridge of your nose. “Ortega would be a bad idea… Mission?”

 “Listen, we both know Sidestep is missing a lot of normal stuff people do in their lives. Like missing a lot of normal stuff. I just… I don’t know. I want to give them a chance to experience some of it even if it’s a bit late.” They rub their arm looking away from you embarrassed.

 “Alright, where are we getting the plushie?” You give in because what can you say to that? Nothing, Sidestep and Anathema absolutely have you wrapped around their fingers.

…

 “What about this one?” Anathema holds up another plushie, this time a gigantic pink cat that almost seems to topple over Anathema.

 “That…might be a bit too big,” an understatement but you can’t help the chuckle as they roll their eyes and put it back.

 “This is the tenth one you’ve denied,” they huff out turning back to you, “What do you suggest than mister picky?” they cross their arms looking at you expectantly.

 You can’t stop the smirk that spreads across your face as you point behind them. They turn around, silent before turning back to glare at you.

 “I’m simultaneously impressed and pissed I didn’t see that sooner.”

 “I thought you’d like that,” you smile wide even as their glare intensifies.

 …

 “Umm, what is this?” Sidestep looks down confused at the bag thrust into their hands by Anathema.

 “Late Birthday present!” they grin as Sidetsep rolls their eyes in response.

 “Firstly, I never told you when my birthday is. Secondly, why would you do this?”

 “Firstly, I don’t care because technically it’s always late for your birthday or we get lucky and get it right on time. Secondly, Why not? You’re our friend and we wanted to give you something,” they shrug, grin never faltering. “Now open it!”

 Sidestep looks at you, a silent plea for help but you shake your head with a smile. They give in, reaching into the bag and pulling out the plushie, face still so very confused. Until they see it. They let out a bark of laughter, a smile splitting their face in absolute glee.

 “It’s a Gerbil!” words broken by their laughter. They bend over trying to regain control over their delighted laughter but can’t quite seem too.

 “See I told you they’d like it,” Anathema elbows you, smirk on their face as they watch Sidestep.

 “Techinely I picked it so I’d count that as my win.”

 “Hey! This isn’t a game,” they look up at you playfully offended.

 “It is and I’m definitely winning,” you cross your arms, head held high and noticing Sidestep regaining control.

 “I’m showing this to Ortega.”

 “Wait. No that’s-”

 “YES!”

[lookwhatilost]

if i had to tell u one thing abt how my parents see me that rly Says As Much As It Needs To, they tell me constantly that they planned me down to the month i was born

24 seems like an old age to be stuck on rebellion against one’s parents. and it absolutely is. i should have gotten it out of my system a long time ago, but circumstance never really allowed. everything had to be planned. they had their plans for me, very strict ones, and if i were to say “no”, then i’d best be equipped w an alternative one. there’s no room for indecision, or confusion. life is not a predictable thing, and i’m not always a predictable person, but if you want to please them, these are things you have to pretend not to be aware of. there’s no room for exploration, or actually taking time to think. you have to constantly be moving from one goal post to the next. that’s how this is. you always have to have an answer to the question “what will you do?”

there isn’t a “now” with people like them. only a “next”

they bought me merch shit from lehigh university from the time i was 5 or 6 years old. there are pics of me in the family photo album of me in my first grade cheerleading garb, and in one of them, i’m wearing a pint-sized lehigh sweatshirt over my actual uniform. when i got a little older, like end of middle school, i told them i wanted to go to college in boston and they both replied w a confused “i thought you wanted to go to lehigh” kinda response. but i remember thinking back then, yknow, i never could recall expressing any organic interest in that. jst sort of resigning to it. “okay, i guess that’s what i’m supposed to do”

they wanted me to be a chemical engineer. isn’t that hilarious?

to bulk up my college application, they railroaded me into a bunch of extracurriculars that i didn’t wanna participate in. forced to swim competitively since i was 8, i had grown so weary of it by the time i’d reached high school. i told them i was tired, that i didn’t want to do it anymore. they said “well if you’re not going to swim, then what are you going to do?” and i didn’t have an answer, but they wouldn’t accept “nothing” as an answer. so i kept doing it even though i didn’t want to. disobedience to them could be met w violence and it wasn’t frequent, but frequent enough that i was always worrying abt it. so i did what they said even if it was making me unhappy

my grades suffered progressively each time we’d move, and when bullying rly ratcheted up in middle school, it sort of bled into this lifelong pattern of personal distress rendering me completely non-functional. i was always a good test taker, but it was hard for me to do any classwork outside of that, bc all i was capable of focusing on was how depressed and lonely i felt. i’d go to my sports practices after school, and come home jst. completely burnt out. rinse and repeat

joke’s on them when i dropped out of high school, i guess. that beefy college application was never sent out to any actual colleges. “well if you’re not going to finish high school, then what are you going to do?” and i didn’t have an answer, but they wouldn’t accept “nothing” as an answer, so i got my equivalency and enrolled in community college. but i was still in the same predicament from personal stress being entirely consuming. i had a rly toxic dynamic w my ex boyfriend (and some of the people who have been following me for a rly long time may remember when i was in the thick of this) who was constantly tasking me w cleaning up the messes he got into through his addiction and general irresponsibility. and then he would dump me for the umpteenth time. or cheat on me. or do something else stupid, and i tolerated it bc he was half of my support system and i couldn’t lose that. it got so stressful and i ended up attempting to k*ll m*self several times, and had to withdraw from school bc i’d missed so much when i was in residential psychiatric treatment

“well if you’re not going to community college, then what are you going to do?” and i didn’t have an answer, but they wouldn’t accept “nothing” as an answer. so i went to cosmetology school and sunk 5 years of my life into an atrocious and thankless industry. i guess i have to hand it to myself. i’ve never stuck w anything for so long, but i never rly cared for any of it. it was easy. and a lot of people in it are really stupid, and it’s easy to excel above people like that. but i never liked it that much. i guess it’s unfair to say i never had my moments. i did have my moments where i was optimistic, where i thought my skill would carry me. i soared above my classmates and had high expectations for myself for a while... until i realized that i wasn’t rly the kind of person who succeeds in this industry. the kind of person who makes any money here is the kind of person who’s complacent enough never to question it. can i really recommend things to people in good faith when i’m aware of the ridiculous markup? can i really insist that what we’re selling is so much better than what they’re getting in the drugstore when i know you’d need a comprehensive education in biochemistry to understand a bottle of shampoo, when i know that almost every beauty school is incidentally owned by one of the companies that manufacture these professional products? can i ever feel okay about plying into people’s insecurities to upsell a ticket? can i ever reconcile that it all, at its core, goes against my ethics?

and i dnt think i can. my roommate and i were looking into moving out of state, but when he pulled back, i still wanted to follow through on the decision. but transferring my cosmetology license would have been very labor-intensive and expensive for something i was already disenchanted with. i thought about other reasons to legitimize the move, and i figured since i was on a cooking kick, maybe it’d be worth monetizing. i am very good at it. when you have a restrictive ED, and dnt want to eat processed diet food shit all day, it teaches you a lot about how to season and prepare things effectively. a lot about portioning, about measurement, about precision, about control. i have it mastered down to an art. i only wanted to look at schools in the specific place i wanted to move, and i only wanted to do a certificate program. when i mistakenly involved my parents in the decision making process, they scheduled me a tour at a more collegiate-minded school in an entirely different state bc it was “the best one” and coaxed me into applying. i did. i realized i’d made a huge mistake, that i was going down the same path that me so unhappy in a trade before. if i go about this from a “nothing” job, if i realize it’s not an environment i wanna be in... it’s not as much of a loss of time, money, expectantions. i told them. they were angry.

i sat down w my dad a few days ago. i explained to him how i felt. he tried to convince me to hold onto it, to try it, “jst one semester, it can’t hurt”. unwilling to see where i was coming from. unwilling to budge. and then he said it, that one thing, that i’m so fucking sick of hearing

“well, if you’re not going to go to culinary school, then what are you going to do?”

and i didn’t have an answer, but he wouldn’t accept “nothing” as an answer

so i said “nothing”

[ldarchive]

all or some of: 10, 18, 19, 20, 25, 28, 30, 35, 36, 39, 40, 41, 42 for the ask meme =) lay all the ari facts on me

ty indigo ilu… shepardposting no limits (HOPEFULLY THE READMORE WORKS?)

10. What kind of friend is Shepard?

the “will give you shit but also go to the ends of the earth” for you type i suppose…he shows his affection thru gentle bullying. he can also be kind of genuinely an overbearing asshole at times, but he gets better with it; it takes him a while to, uh, adjust to having “friends” in the first place. he’s a dad friend if your dad is kind of a grumpy punk with a rude and morbid sense of humor

18. Share a headcanon about Shepard and their LI.

[struggling to come up with something i haven’t talked about a million times] uhhhhhh

kaidan wanted to propose with one of his dad’s old rings but he figured out it wouldn’t fit ari’s finger, so (with his mother’s blessing/assurance that his dad would have been more than happy abt it, etc) he had the gold melted down to make a new ring. in my mind it looks smth like this and yes ari totally cried a little

it also took kaidan weeks of near-misses to work up the nerve to propose even tho he Knew ari was gonna say yes, he was just really worried about getting it right. eventually he just did it on their balcony and ari got surprised and dropped his cigarette and kaidan got a cool new engagement burn scar on his arm but it was nice

19. Why did they fall for each other?

ari fell for kaidan bc he’s not just intelligent, but perceptive; he’s a realist who errs toward optimism and making the best of bad situations; he believes people can and should be better; he has a surprisingly understated sense of humor; he can keep up with ari’s teasing; ari asks him if he’s a romantic and he denies it and then gives, like, the most romantic answer in the world. he’s cute.

kaidan fell for ari bc……. he has big arm. ok but uh i think it’s because he’s, pretty practical and matter of fact and doesn’t care all that much about the social trappings that kaidan continually tortures himself with… he makes kaidan feel Seen and Understood but doesn’t make a big dramatic deal out of everything kaidan tells him, he just treats him… like a person. for someone who’s been living with & defining themselves by their issues for as long as kaidan has, it’s pretty incredible to find someone who just makes him feel like a human being again

20. What are their common interests or hobbies?

a lot of their relationship is like, meeting each other in the middle haha, but there are some things they both enjoy a lot with no caveats:

- cooking! kaidan’s a foodie and it becomes ari’s therapy hobby after me3, so it’s smth they enjoy doing together a lot. they try to do it more often if possible, but their general friday night tradition is to come home, crack open a couple beers, and cook a big meal together

- they are both outdoorsy Adventure Dads… it takes a while before ari can handle more than a walk around the park but eventually he and kaidan can go hiking again and they both rly love it. i imagine theyd be into stuff like camping, swimming, kayaking, etc too dfjnfg

25. Is there something they fight about?

well, everyone gets into arguments occasionally, but i don’t really think they fight all that often… not that they agree on everything all the time, but they’ve both gotten pretty good at talking things out and also deciding whether or not something is even worth arguing about in the first place. when you are dating someone during the apocalypse and don’t have to any time to waste those are both pretty valuable skills haha [i think the most they ever fought in their relationship was post-me3, when ari got out of the hospital and they’d both started to ‘settle in’ to their new lives but it was a bumpy adjustment and they were both going thru a lot of trauma and stress and bottling it up etc. it wasnt a great time but they worked thru it]

28. What would they like to change about the other?

it’s a double-edged sword, bc it’s part of what attracts kaidan to him as well, but sometimes kaidan really wishes ari had more a self-preservation instinct!! sometimes his tendency to charge headfirst into trouble is sexy, sometimes kaidan is tired and sad and it just gets really old

ari wishes kaidan would loosen up a little although, again, the straight-laced military thing (unfortunately) kinda does it for him. he would also take away kaidans chronic pain if he could

30. When did they realise they fell in love?

fr kaidan it was shortly after virmire and it absolutely scared the shit out of him ahaha

ari is dumb so he didn’t really realize until after horizon, which was probably a bad way to figure that out,35. Is there anything they dislike about the other?

ari appreciates how thoughtful kaidan is but sometimes it’s like… a bit… much lmao, he’s not as navel gaze-y as kaidan is so sometimes the process of having to talk everything out gets tiring. for kaidan it’s kind of the opposite, he sometimes perceives ari’s lack of forethought as a lack of care, which isn’t really true, he just works differently

on a much pettier level, ari gets annoyed that kaidan wants to sleep in all the time and kaidan gets annoyed that ari drowns all his food in hot sauce. hello, i worked hard on that steak36. What are their best memories together?

advtykefd cheesy but i like to think they got to take a little bit of leave after me1 so… they rented a log cabin somewhere (not sure if they went back to earth or just a colony planet somewhere?), turned off non-emergency comms on their omnitools and just chilled for a bit… went hiking, had drinks at the tiny bar in the closest small town, holed up in the cabin all day and had sex lmao it was probably the most peaceful week of aris entire life and it left a big impression on him

ofc later there’s stuff like their wedding day, their son’s birth, adopting their daughter etc. kaidan would probably even say, with the emotional distance provided by time, that horizon counts cuz even tho it sucked at the time nothing could have been better than realizing ari was alive

40. Is there someone in the squad of ME/ME2/ME3 Shepard dislikes? Why?

MIRANDA LOL… they just. do not see to eye or get along at all. i find their relationship very entertaining for this reason bc the dynamic of commander & XO who are both trying to be professional but do not respect e/o even the tiniest bit is so funny. theres a convo w her in me2 (i think it might be the one where you can initiate her romance?) where if you choose the renegade dialogue is hilarious to me… miranda makes some snide, passive aggressive comment about shepard based on their background (it’s like “it’s amazing how you’ve managed to succeed despite being _____” lmao) and then shepard is like “OH i get it, you’re jealous bc i’ve been more successful than you and TIM likes me more even tho i’m a big piece of shit idiot?” i love it it’s so funny. they both suck. eventually they do build some kind of mutual respect btwn them but theyre still… not exactly friends. i think in me3 ari was like “damn i hope miranda’s ok” and then when he actually met her again remembered why he used to be so pissed at her all the time lmao. (after me3 tho she saves his life Again and they probably have a lot of time in the hospital to just talk so maybe they do become genuine friends)

41. Are there any important relationships in Shepard’s past that defined their character? /42. Is there someone who had a great influence on Shepard?

just gonna try to combine these i guess,

- his parents, although he only got an unfortunate short time with them, he takes after both of them a lot, and the things his parents imparted on him stuck with him, but especially as he gets older he’s also really aware of the mistakes they made

-the reds, in general. not a really positive influence lmao but. they were his home for years & he learned how the world works through them, for better or worse… it’s why he’s a bit of a cynic, although later he is able to characterize it more as “this shit sucks But we can make it better” rather than just “this shit sucks”

- anderson was the first person ari ever felt saw him as a human being, and it was… a slow-going thing to learn to trust him ahah, but wanting to be worthy of anderson’s approval shaped a lot of his career decisions

[moirasimagines]

How about a would include for my baby boy Merlin pining for a new Kingman agent? Maybe it is her first mission. How does he handle making sure the girl he's crushing on doesn't get hurt? By obviously let your creative juices flow, darling! 💚

omg i love this thank you cutie!

in the beginning of things, merlin is SO careful not to pull favorites bc it’s very important to him to stay impartial? 

like he always has recruits that he’s rooting for but since attraction winds up in the mix he’s a little harder on himself about it, so he kind of beats himself up about it 

this is not to say that he’s not professionally amazed by her, because he absolutely is. it’s one of the reasons he’s interested in her!

but he’s worried that courting her would involve abuse of power? because even though he’s objectively lower ranked than agents, he like??? trained them and is their main point of contact for so much

so if he pursued her, he’d be worried that she felt pressured to reciprocate. so he’d probably take a while to get past that

in fact, she would probably have to make the first move (but let’s be honest he’d love that bc no one gives him the time of day)

but leading up to this, he’d defintely just sort of proudly watch her pass the tests and have to stifle little smiles when she kicks some posh prick’s ass

they probably start developing a friendship during the training process? it’s definitely gotta be subtle but i think he’s just sort of encouraging and stuff. like they just get along, you know? 

they have a lil natural back and forth. like she’ll succeed at a task and he’ll just ‘well done, ____’ and she just smiles and ‘i aim to please’ but its nice its not overtly flirty like they just get on at first

and then gradually, unbeknownst to the other they both start to develop feelings probably once she’s been knighted and all

and on her first mission she’s not really nervous but he’s sittng there walking her through the tech and at some point she just ‘we’ve come a long way, haven’t we?’

and he just gets this small lil smile and ‘i suppose we have’

and shes like getting ready to leave and he’s kind of walking her out to like her car or private jet or whatever lmao and he’s like ‘and i’ll be in yer ear the whole time’

and she sort of brushes him off a little like ‘i can handle myself’ etc but like she also genuinely thanks him for looking out for her

and he just ‘i know i’m bein’ a little protective, but i want ye to know that we wouldn’t put you out there if we thought you weren’t ready.’

and so she goes on the mission and its all fine and they’re like even trading some witty remarks as u do when there is a hot scottish man talking to u on bluetooth

but then something goes Fucking Wrong like something very not anticipated and merlin is having to deliver like very tense instructions like? i don’t even necessarily see it as a high action moment, it’s more like some intensely close call where her cover gets blown?

which then probably ends with a fight tbh and at that point like merlin is sort of stiffly listening to it all go down? but he doesn’t say anything for fear of distracting her

and like he knows she’ll be fine she can hold her own they chose her for a reason but he also doesn’t know that, so he just sort of waits until the sounds die out and she just is like breathing so heavily and then; ‘...merlin?’

and he snaps right to attention (no time for emotion, amirite ladies?) and is sort of intense and almost business-y? just like ‘i’m extracting you immediately–– are you injured, can you make it to the rendez-vous point?’

and when she finally gets back they probably take her to the med bay or whatever its called and maybe shes got some minor injuries or something a little more serious but it’s not enough that she’s passed out or anything

and merlin kind of ambles in and sits beside her bed and just ‘agent gawain. i’m glad yer all right’ (i use gawain as the codename bc... it sounds so good w/ the scottish accent like fuck me uppppp)

and she just sort of looks at him and yanks him down by the tie or collar or what have you (i like to think his lil shirt-tie-sweater combo is a regular thing, so lets say tie) and plants one on him

and lbr kingsman has.... so little staff so no one sees like the fucking med staff probably went home why do we never see any staff???? vaughn explain

and they pull away and he sort of blinks once or twice and just ‘i wasn’t expecting tha’....’

and shes like ‘but?’

‘but it was a wonderful surprise’ and he’s just grinning because FINALLY

[realtalk-princeton]

To Maybach -- Anon 2023 again. Honestly, my other major option is Brown (and Penn, but that's out by now) and I'm concerned that I'd be sacrificing happiness if I choose Pton. "Happy" is a part of the Brown brand, whereas "ahhhhh" seems to be a part of Pton's. I want the name and the opportunities Pton would afford me. I suppose that's not a question, but how would you respond? Do you understand what I mean? Is it so awful to pick Pton 4 name/opportunity (in addition to the other stuff)

Sorry for the delay everyone, I just got caught up in a lot of obligations. Due to multiple popular demands from both pre-frosh and current students, I decided to structure my Brown and Princeton story in the following manner. In the first section, I’ll give my background context prior to starting college and my feelings throughout the years on the subject. In the second section, I’ll specifically address the above question in more detail with my many thoughts on key distinctions between the two schools. I think the combination will serve the purposes of everyone quite nicely. Lastly, if any pre-frosh ever want to talk to me, feel free to reach out and ask for my contact information. Or even better yet lol, I just remembered that PREVIEW started, so I guess it might be easier to just talk in person to me. I actually don’t even have class tomorrow haha. I just think that talking is sometimes easier than writing and also in these responses sometimes I have to speculate. For example, I can pretty safely state that if a pre-frosh is almost certain of being a pre-med, Brown is probably going to be a much less stressful experience, but I have no idea if this applies to you beforehand.

So anyway, even though it was four years ago, I still remember it like it was yesterday. Boy time flies. I was not the most studios or stand-out HS student. I wasn’t the valedictorian or salutatorian of a rather small school far away from major cities. While some Princetonian HS students spent summer doing lab research at universities, I spent mine goofing off with friends and traveling. We used to actually have a bonfire at the end of the school year and burned stacks of our HW up to 4 feet high lol. When it came to applying to college, I did not actually even again acceptance to NYU or BC lol even though my stats were more than up to par. I guess maybe they were concerned that I wouldn’t be a very hard-working student. Luckily, I am very fortunate that despite coming from an extremely educated family (grandfather and mom went to Columbia, Dad went to Berkeley, etc.), my parents never put that much pressure on me. So as you can imagine, I was super excited when I heard that I got into Princeton, Brown, Cornell, and some other schools. For a period of time, I was actually getting ready to go to Brown. My SO at the time had committed to URI and I was psyched by the super expressive culture of Brown. Students prided themselves on being true to themselves and also took full advantage of freedom with responsibility. The location was close enough to NYC and some kids from my HS were already there. I always hated excessive structure and authority growing up and the prospect of 70%’s A’s granted, no +/I’s, and pass/failing anything was totally alluring! On a side note, I always laugh when they say that people don’t abuse pass/fail and use it only like 10-15% of the time. Well, maybe that’s because they’re already handing out A’s like it’s water and all A-’s become A’s haha. But anyway, I was psyched. Who wouldn’t want to live at camp Brown and take it easier than HS, but still be guaranteed a legit degree on your resume? However, after I visited Princeton, connected with a large number of alumni, and actually started putting real thought into my education, my perspectives slowly, but surely started to change. I think what I really underestimated was the power of the Princeton degree and how impressive our alumni network truly is. The people I met and still meet to this day are absolutely brilliant in several respects (e.g. they aren’t just nerds in one subject) and many are focused on maximizing their impact and allocation of influence in this world. The alumni donation rate is nothing short of incredible and the chance to be part of this network was alluring. I remember meeting a guy actually who got waitlisted and was already attending Duke when he got the chance to go to Princeton. He lived every moment to the fullest with his academic pursuits, the social network of brilliant, but diverse persons, and solid career plans. Anyway, it just became more clear to me over time that while Princeton was rigorous, it’s academic qualities could be much more intimate and engaged than Brown and the intellectual horsepower of its students (mostly) created truly incredible and impactful people. Jeez lol I forget sometimes how many alumni we have on the SC, in politics, business, arts, etc. At Brown, all they do is gush over Emma Watson in an almost cult-like way (sarcasm). But anyway, I was getting pushed as you can imagine, but I was still worried as I wasn’t the best HS student and grade deflation had literally only ended the year before. But eventually, the offer was just too good to pass up. Once you become a Princeton student, your life truly does change and people will treat you give you credit solely based on this fact (whether it’s right or wrong is another story). I remember before I even committed, I was hanging out at the Princeton Club in New York and a few days later some of the guys (who literally knew me for like a few days), invited me out and basically paid of lunch at Smith and Wollensky and lauded me on my “accomplishments” lol and how they could always be resources to bolster a Princetonian. Pretty soon after I committed.

As for answering your specific question, I’m already seeing red flags. Whenever you choose a school for the name, that’s setting yourself up for a bad time. Yes, our opportunities are better. Look at the difference in endowments lol. It’s like that for a reason even though they have way more students and more grad schools. It’s also reflected as well in our post-graduation salary averages. Brown is more creative with RISD and it’s curriculum, but that doesn’t always equal more opportunities. Princeton has the most power and resources of any university on a per-student basis and gives us an incredibly powerful brand and network. That said, you should probably explore why you want to go to Princeton other than the name and brand. One of the miserable people I know picked Princeton over another school because it was the “Best” school she got into and that’s just not fun when you didn’t research enough beforehand. By contrast, I know someone who turned down Harvard for a small liberal arts school in the middle of nowhere and she had an amazing time. If you feel like and click with Brown’s social scene, that’s another reason for not going to Princeton. Academically, Princeton is better for people who want rigor and want to truly maximize their learning in a short period of time and be around amazing minds. Our depth is much better than Brown’s and it shows with how strong our students are in critical thinking skills both inside and outside of their majors. However, there is a downside to this. For example, if you want to major in physics at Princeton, you better adapt fast or be damn good at it. You can’t just “love” physics and be relatively bad at it (compared to your peers) to succeed here because we teach you to be the best students possible from professors who literally wrote your book. At Brown, sure you don’t learn as much or go as deep, but you can major in almost anything because you just aren’t held to the same standards. So there’s a tradeoff. If I majored in Brown’s business program, let me just say that I would not NEARLY be perceived by others to be so intelligent (even though I’m not lol). I know the kids in the degree, it’s not like they are dumb, but jeez lol is it a joke a bunch of the time. Relating sociology to business for example on the surface can seem like a good idea that teaches people until you actually see what they’re writing and working on. I would probably have a 4.0 without working as hard too. And I don’t mean this to mean I’m like super smart or anything. It’s just not comparable to Princeton. However, I am super blessed and thankful that I did take Economics here seriously. The kinds of critical thinking skills and the ability to analytically dissect complex multi-faceted problems that I have developed serve me very well and I feel so rewarded. I literally got a position at a hedge fund with no experience at all because the interviewer liked how I wrote a research paper on guns an applied rigorous statistical analysis in many novel ways to answer new questions. This is no different in many ways than using public information using novel techniques to find value where nobody else sees it. But overall, I think that I’m feeling Brown for you unless you are willing to work harder here for greater depth of learning. I just want to say too though that despite me working hard, I still don’t pull-allnighters almost ever and I still have achieved very high grades. You don’t have to be a genius to do well here. Take it from me. I had piss-poor test scores (by Princeton standards) and was not a valedictorian, but if you are strategic and work reasonably hard and are disciplined, the work is more than doable. I don’t want to brag because I think it promotes bad culture, but you ought to know that a student like me can succeed academically and perform at the top of their class without working in the library all the time. So you should really evaluate what kind of learning experience you want and where you will be most likely to be happy and healthy. Some people just want a break after HS and don’t care about going super deep into their learning development. That’s totally fine, but then Brown is probably better (assuming you also like the culture). Some people would really abuse Brown’s system, not really learn, develop unhealthy and bad habits, and be kind of bored. In that case, Princeton is better. It really depends on you, but if all you see here for you is a name, you’re probably shooting yourself in the foot coming here.

Anyway hope that all helps. I can answer specifics if you have them too.

Edit. also I realized how long this all is and noticed that maybe some of you should just call me or I can connect you with people I know who love Brown lol. It’s sometimes harder to write these things and express everything properly compared to like a 30-minute dinner conservasation. Just putting it out there. I’m also exhausted lol from staying up until 4am the past few nights for this huge deal coming up. I did this tonight so that I wouldn’t mess up my sleep schedule any further and avoid taking a nap lol.

[icharchivist]

Dgm: Lol, it's nice to have someone to chat about it. I've always kind of wondered about it ever since I knew there were more bookman then the two we have. Of course this being dgm I knew nothing could be perfect or simple. Afterall encouraging a someone since the age of 6 to throw away all their humanity is a pretty twisted thing no matter the goal. Bookman Sr himself looks like he might he a hyprocrite depending on what he's hiding that even Lavi doesn't know. The Komui Talks where Lavi -

2 mentions other bookman members being ever all over the world (which is why Lavi and Bookman never worry about money) and the bookman past Allen theory only made me think about it more. I truly believe that somehow Allen will end up going to wherever the Bookman clan resides someday and we’ll get to see the heart of the clan there through Allen’s eyes. Yes totally I agree! I bet Lavi has also escaped the Noah. But something happened to him to cause him to lose his status as the successor. -

3 Since Hoshino confirmed Lavi will be Bookman. It’s possible Lavi is going to have to fight for his right to succeed that role instead of just simply inheriting it. Like you said it’s possible not everyone was happy w/Lavi as the heir and w/Bookman dead/dying they went ahead and picked someone else while he was missing. Shoot maybe someone else was originally going to be Bookman Sr pupil. But then Bookman rejected them for Lavi at the last minute. That someone could have been the clan favorite.

aah likewise nonny, it’s super nice to talk about all of this ❤ and thank u for opening my eyes on this topic i somewhat took for granted. 

and you’re completely right, it cannot be that simple. And if Hoshino had a full series based on the concept of Bookmen it cannot be that simple. 

And… y’know what I kinda accepted it with a shounen logic but you’re totally right just encouraging someone since the age of 6 to throw away their humanity should be major warning signs of fucked up organizations.  And yea Bookman Sr being an hypocrite wouldn’t surprise me. 

But yeah at this point I think that it’s just.. good thematically? Allen struggling with both sides of the war, would only look for the “neutral party” until he can make a choice, realizing the neutrality isn’t working ect… at this point of the story it would make a lot of sense, especially after an arc as heavy as the Alma arc that called out the Order hard. The fact we explore Allen’s past while he’s in full struggle about the sides of the war just… makes it all the more curious.

“ …and we’ll get to see the heart of the clan there through Allen’s eyes“ i see what u did there

And yeah!! I think if Lavi hadn’t escaped yet anyway his title is in jeopardy (”Bookman doesn’t have a successor anymore”, such a loaded dialogue), so yeah he either escaped but lost his statue or is believed dead, but a clan like the Bookmen who had lived for centuries won’t lay the fate of their entiere organization on the shoulder of two people right? imagine the amount of history lost just because the two carriers of it were being careless. So yeah, i can totally see them have a “back up successor” for this kind of situation - well less formed bc without the Bookman in charge, but something to carry on the clan, even if they have to start the Bookman education from scratch.

And yeah I think it’s honestly likely Lavi will have to fight to keep his title. I could completely see this kind of situation. And yeah exactly!! there’s so much reasons to see eventually people kick out Lavi from the spot- and tbh I think it would be a nice twist for the readers that something we all took for granted like Lavi being the successor, that we took for granted because of two biased characters talking about it (and a bias with the Bookmen is already a twist in itself), and show us that’s it’s not that easy.

And tbh the more i think about it the more i seriously think Lavi took the place of another pupil: that someone else was supposed to be successor or was a strong favorite for the clan. The insistance that it’s his secret around his eye that allowed him to be picked as successor in the novel….. makes an insistance on the fact that he wouldn’t have been a First Choice would he not have had a special thing. 

also just checking back the novel to be sure. The wording is nice: 

“People must imagine all sorts of things about his right eye. But no one could guess that the loss of this eye was what determined his ascent to the title of Bookman’s successor.The truth, only his master knew it. No one else had any needs to know about it.No one else… A slight shiver went through his body. The Autumn wind seemed suddenly colder, for some reasons Lavi couldn’t pinpoint.”

Not word for word bc y’know traduction and all, but the longing (…) on the “No one else” that is repeated with it sending a shiver down Lavi’s spin. Makes it really look like Lavi took the place of someone and the reason why was never explained. Which gives even more reason for the Clan to eventually reject Lavi would they not know why Bookman picked him in detail, and would make for a bitter Rival Successor who might have seen their dreamjob (something they were ready to dedicate their life to) taken by a kid for no obvious reasons. (ESPECIALLY since Lavi mentions that for exemple the search for the Key in the arc was harder since he only had one valid eye: So that could be thrown at him that his missing eye makes him less effective of a Bookman. Like he could read faster with two eyes and such)

I’m kinda starting to see it as more than a valid direction the manga could take tbh? Like… there’s stuff that can go in that direction and that would put Lavi under a lot of pressure. 

It would be nice to see this sort of Rival say, still being in the Clan (obviously) but while keeping a close eye on Lavi would be more and more pissed than the kid who can’t help but have a bias is the one who was picked and could totally put it back into reconsideration the moment the only person who knows why Lavi was picked will be dead. tbh that would also probably add more to all the reasons we have now (adding the Past!A=Apprentice theory) why Bookman Sr is THAT severe with him. Bookman probably took a major gamble on Lavi without the full Clan’s approval, while keeping secrets, so more than ever he cannot let Lavi mess it up and give reasons to the Clan to have doubted that decision Bookman apparently never explained. (also if Past!A=Apprentice theory, it could also explain how Allen could get more leeway with Nea than Lavi has in general, since Lavi is therefore a complete Gamble to take).

I’m… seriously seeing it be a possibility orz

I’m soo looking forward a Bookman arc ahhhh

[lunarthedragon]

Hey (; A request for a short story with Mama Inko and BigBro Aizawa bc its totally necesary and we need more of it. Zuzu can be thete too to make him eveb more flustered, ofc. KILL ME WITH FLUFFFF *leaves a lot of cookies as payment* U rock Luniv :3c

Read on Ao3: here

Aizawa was good at keeping injuriesto a minimum. He was stealthy and silent, able to take down villains within afew seconds before anything could get too bad, but sometimes they got thebetter of him. Sometimes they were more vicious or capable than the undergroundhero had previously thought, or sometimes they just got a good couple hits inby chance.

Like tonight… He was lucky. Thevillain hadn’t done too much damage to require a trip to the hospital, and theywere still defeated and put into police custody, but Aizawa knew he lookedawful. He felt awful.

His entire back felt like one giantbruise from being thrown off a roof and cuts covered his arms and legs, theworst of which being one on his left calf. His face probably was a mess of purpleskin and he knew he had some swelling because his right eye’s vision wasgetting thinner and blurrier at the edges. He could feel his heart beat throughhis whole body, a painful, echoing pulse.

When he had finally managed to gethome after his patrol he was met with a bit of a conundrum. In the past, when avillain got the better of him, he would collapse in his apartment, uncaringwhere, and pass out. He knew he needed to dress his wounds, he knew he shouldtake painkillers and eat something and sleep somewhere more comfortable thanthe floor or the couch, but these thoughts rarely mattered in the moment. Sure,he would know logically he should do these things, but it always felt more likea distant voice, a forgotten memory, telling him to do so and he would end upjust falling asleep anyway, body more convincing than the mind.

But nowadays things were different.Nowadays he didn’t have to only rely on himself until Hizashi or Nemuriappeared during the day to finally get him moving and working on tending to hiswounds. Nowadays he wasn’t alone anymore.

Which is how he finds himselfsitting in the Midoriya apartment at four in the morning, head lowered inexhaustion, Inko quietly fretting over him. He felt bad for waking her up. Shemay not have work tomorrow, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t want to rest, andAizawa hated that he was taking that away from her.

“I am sorry for this,Midoriya-san,” he says, his voice raspy, when Inko returns with a washcloth.The woman doesn’t hesitate as she pulls a chair forward and begins to wipe offsome of the grime from the man’s face.

“I don’t want any apologies,” shesays quietly. They didn’t really need to be quiet, Izuku wasn’t there, he wassleeping over at his explosive friend’s house… The literally explosive one, notthe explosively loud, redheaded one. But the atmosphere was such that speakingtoo loudly seemed inappropriate. “I want you to come to me when you need me.”

Aizawa’s expression doesn’t change,it hardly can with how much his face hurts, and he watches his neighbor quietly.Her touch is gentle and patient, cleaning up wounds with as little pain aspossible. He hardly even flinches, and the silence makes him drowsy despite theache.

He felt bad for waking up Inko, buthe also felt grateful. He knew he could trust her, knew she would always bethere to help. He didn’t know what he had done in his life to deserve theMidoriyas, but he didn’t think he could ever give them up. He had never had afamily like this before. Hizashi and Nemuri were close, but Inko and Izuku weresomething else entirely.

“Thank you,” he says quietly asInko begins to patch him up, wrapping up his arms and legs. He has to take offhis shirt and scarf and roll up his pants legs, but none of it feels awkward.Little made Aizawa feel awkward anyway, but Inko just was able to let out acalming aura with everything she did, so long as she wasn’t worrying up a storm.

“Of course,” the woman says,pausing just long enough so she can catch Aizawa’s eye and smile at him. “It’sa mother’s job to look after her boys.”

Aizawa lets out a long sigh, headlowering. “I’m never going to live that down, am I?” he questions roughly andInko quickly fetches him a glass of water, which feels like heaven on histhroat. It hadn’t been all that long ago that he’d accidentally called Inko“mom,” and no one had forgotten it. Izuku had even begun calling him“Aizawa-nii” regularly, which he still wasn’t sure how how he felt about that.

“I truly am honored,” Inko saysquietly, turning back to her work, a small smile on her face, and Aizawa goesback to watching her. “You’re a wonderful young man,” she explains, using herquirk to float over another roll of gauze for his leg. “You’re strong, devoted,brave, and you look after Izuku, too. You have… terrible self care habits,” herface twists a little and Aizawa smirks at her irritation. “I want to help youovercome them. I want to see you succeed and do well and behealthy. I want my home to be a place you feel safe.”

One of Inko’s hands falls ontoAizawa’s knee, making him look up at her again. He was beginning to fade, hisbody relaxing and his nerves calming, sleep scratching at his eyelids.

“I do not know what your family waslike growing up,” the woman says and distant, empty memories flash in his headof coming back to his family’s apartment and not seeing it as a home, just aplace to sleep. Of being alone for hours and hours on end after school. Ofhaving all his needs met, save for parents that actually cared about him orwhat he was doing. “But I would like to think you’re part of our family now.”

Inko stands – she’s just about donewith the wounds now – and Aizawa turns his tired eyes up at her. “You don’thave to see me as your mother, but know that I have no issue with it, and that itwould make me proud to call you my son,” she smiles a bit brighter, “And Izukulooks up to you more than you realize. You make an excellent older brother.”Aizawa snorts, lowering his head and shaking out some of his hair. 

“Never really wanted a littlesibling,” he half jokes, his voice distant, uncertain how else he is supposedto respond, and Inko hums, helping adjust his hair some for him.

“Most kids don’t, but you get oneanyway,” she whispers and suddenly there’s a pressure on the top of Aizawa’s head,an alien feeling yet somehow he still recognizes it and his eyes widen inshock. Inko presses a kiss to the crown of his head, like a mother to herchild’s, then leans away and smiles down at his dumbfounded expression. “Sleephere tonight. Izuku’s bed is empty and it will be better than that couch ofyours,” she says, nodding towards her son’s empty room, then pats down Aizawa’shair one more time. “And no matter what you decide to call us… Know that welove you, Shouta,” she nods to him, meaningful and loving, then turns and headsto clean up everything she had pulled out to tend to his wounds.

He watches her silently, his eyeswide, or as wide as they can be with one of them swollen, and when shedisappears into the kitchen, cupboards opening and closing, he shifts and facesforward once more. His elbows rest on his knees and his head hangs, shouldersslouched and back curled. Truly, meaningfully kind words were difficult for himto swallow sometimes. He could deal with shallow ones, or playful ones, therewere logical responses to all of those, but this? This was not familiar groundfor him.

Despite the uncertainty, however,he felt… good. Loved. Like part of a family he hadn’t realized he’d beenmissing.

He smiles to himself, gathering uphis shirt and capture weapon, and very carefully stands. He was exhausted and,with the help of his neighbor and a safe place to rest, he was sure he would begetting some good sleep this time around.

Before he heads towards Izuku’sempty room to pass out, he tilts his head back towards where he still hearsInko rummaging around, and speaks softly so only he can hear it. He would sayit out loud to her honestly one day, just not today.

“Thank you, mom.”