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noona96n · 9 months

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Yoh & Segasaki's timeline

According to Episode 7 (around the 00:33 minute mark), Yoh and segasaki have only been living together for four months. And Nikke-sensei's tweet, also clarifies that the proposal was made 3 years ago and that they’ve only been living together since March or April; which explains, in part, their shit communication lmao.

Series timeline: June to July of year zero

Ep 1: June 3rd (Sat)

The sunny weather forecast with Segasaki and Takatsu Reiko around the 12:30 minute mark in the latter part of Episode 1 is for 6月3日 (土). That means the present timeline, as in the drama, starts at the beginning of June; which tracks with the weather in the current episode and the weather in future episodes. Rainy season (梅雨 tsuyu) in Kanto (that includes Tokyo and Yokohama) usually starts in early June and lasts until mid-July, and, by then, typhoons already started ravaging the nation every two days lol

Ep 2: June 8th (Thur)

At the 8:03 minute mark, we find out that Hiyoshi Aika starts her job at EW (AHAHA WHAT A GOOFY ABBREVIATION) on the 8th of June (Hiyoshi Aika starts the broadcast by announcing the date: 六月八日). By June 10th, Yoh full-on became a sad, sulky puppy who’s pouting cutely as he made his sad stir-fry pork dinner (Yoh’s phone screen at the 9:05 minute mark reads ６月10日土曜日).

Around 9:56 minute mark the in-universe weather forecast shows forecasts for the 12th (Mon), 13th (Tue), 14th (Wed), 15th (Thur), 16th (Fri), 17th (Sat), and 18th (Sun) in Sapporo, Tokyo, Nagoya, Osaka, Fukuoka, and Naha, suggesting that the day that Yoh resorts to making the Teru Teru Bouzu is June 11th. (Teru Teru Bouzu is a small ghost-like white doll people hang around the house in the hope of stopping the rain and bringing about good weather. Yoh’s desperate for some dicking down lol.) So, the day Yoh got frustrated and masturbated for erotic manga inspiration is at least a day after June 11th. Yoh and Segasaki’s clothes changed by then (the most noticeable is Segasaki’s shirt and tie).

Since the tail end of Episode 2 probably takes place on June 12th, at the earliest, we can only assume that Episode 3 and 4 take place over the weekend of the 17th and 18th. Or the next weekend after. I’m tempted to even suggest that both episodes take place on the weekend of 24th (Sat) and 25th (Sun) because of how loud the cicadas were in the background in the 4th episode with Man-san. Cicadas in Japan are no joke, guys, they are so fucking damn loud, RIP ears, you will be missed.

Ep 6: July 24th (Mon)

*** I think canon dates broke down from Episode 5 onward… Around the 14:47 minute mark of Episode 5, Segasaki and Hiyoshi were presenting the weather for the 7th (Thur). There’s no monthly indication but we can assume that it’s in July; July because we were just in June in the first four episodes but also because (the beginning of) July is when the (awful, terrible, no good) heatwave starts taking Japan by storm (it lasts until fucking August and even spills into September this goddamn year, I kid you not; it was horrible). But, in Episode 6, the weather forecast at the end of the episode (around the 21:33 minute mark) was for 24th (Mon). If the 7th was a Thursday, then the 24th should be a Sunday, not a Monday.

That’s why I’m just gonna disregard the 7th (Thur) in Episode 5, though I do think it takes place at the beginning of June or the end of July. Also, if we disregard that and count the days from Episode 1 (Saturday, June 3rd), then Monday, July 24th would make sense in Episode 6. So, let's go with that.

By the end of Episode 6, it’s the 24th of July. I know this is a while from Episode 5 but if we consider Man-san’s My Idol Boyfriend manga, then it makes sense. Yoh was ‘offered a job’ by Man-san pretty much immediately after he got dropped by his editor and by Episode 7, their manga was already in print. It would take them some time to finish their manga; less than a month is a very tight time to write, storyboard, edit, and have it approved but let’s make believe lol

Ep 7: Typhoon No. 5

At the beginning of Episode 7 (around the 00:09 minute mark), Typhoon No. 5 was forecasted to take Tokyo by storm tomorrow. That kinda checks out, to be honest. Typhoon season in Japan could start as early as mid-May and could last until mid-October, depending on how early or late the heat begins and how long it’ll last. So I do think Episode 7 takes place some time after July 24th.

Interesting tidbit: typhoons in Japan aren’t given names but are usually referred to by numbers.

Personal (interesting?) tidbit #1: the first year I came to Japan, the super typhoon Hagibis made landfall in Japan. It was the strongest typhoon to hit Japan in decades and it was one of the strongest and biggest ever recorded. It was hella scary, not gonna lie lol and food was all out, even from the convenience stores. Fortunately, I was living in central Tokyo and wasn’t affected. Still scared though…. And, the crazy thing was, an earthquake struck the coast of Chiba before the typhoon hit so the typhoon’s effect was compounded. Wasn’t a fun experience, 0/10, do not recommend.

Personal (interesting?) tidbit #2: my parents visited me this passing late May to early June, around the time typhoon Mawar wasn’t waging war in the Pacific. It was not a fun experience… we weren’t directly struck by it but the effects were kinda crazy: roads were closed, trains were suspended, rivers were flooded, and shops and restaurants were mostly closed. Felt really bad cause I took my family to Hakone (booked everything ages in advance and couldn’t cancel our reservation RIP) and we were just stranded up there… thankfully the sky cleared by our last day there and we were able to catch a glimpse of Fuji on our Ashi-no-ko’s cruise and on the train back to Tokyo. Still, wasn’t a fun experience, 0/10, do not recommend.

Japan’s a wonderful place to visit though! Just… pick the right time. (I recommend autumn (Oct-Nov) because the weather’s great, the food’s fucking amazing, and the autumn foilage’s pretty rad.)

Ep 8: July 28th

The date after their (mildly) kinky sexy time was July 28th (Fri). The date can be found on Man-san’s phone around the 11:00 minute mark (7月28日、金曜日).

There’s also another time indication later in the episode around the 17:13 minute mark where Yoh and Segasaki last texted on July 26th. Segasaki was telling Yoh about the rain and Yoh’s responses were pretty frosty if I’m being honest. Their texts go like this:

Segasaki: 今日午後から雨降る (It’s gonna rain this evening) Yoh: ありがとう (thanks) Segasaki: 洗濯物取り込んどけよ (bring the laundry in) Yoh: うん (k)

It’s… frosty. Bare minimum from Yoh. Ofc he’s just feeling guilty (about the manga situation and stuff) but, y’know… it feels cold to Segasaki. I honestly feel really bad for the guy lol, especially because, from his perspective, Yoh’s only thinking about leaving and Yoh’s touchy-feely with that editor guy, and Yoh smiles happily and fully at and with that editor guy, and Yoh’s tired from being with him.

Anyway, the series takes place from June to July of year zero and that’s canon. There, I said it.

Yoh moving in: April of year zero

As you can see from my shittily drawn ‘graph’, I place Yoh’s moving in with Segasaki at April. This tracks with the timeline and Nikke-sensei’s clarification as well as in-universe narrative of them only been living together for four months. But, I’m extra so I’m gonna explain why (I found out about sensei’s tweet after figuring out the timeline lol)... and it’s not just backtracking from July.

So, in Japan, the year usually ‘starts’ in April; as in the school year and the fiscal year ends in March and starts in April. This applies to leases as well: contracts are usually for 2 years and will likely end in March. Housing is in very high demand during that time and the prices for each unit are also very expensive because of that. Of course, you can rent a unit any time of the year but the good ones are also mostly available and up for grabs in the March-April period. (Renting a unit in Japan is… an experience lol and not a fun one. My being a foreigner does not help one bit because many landlords do not accept foreign tenants no matter who you are, where you’re from, or what you’re in Japan for.)

Anyways, as Yoh can see, I think that Yoh graduated in year zero… so, that’s a winter graduation some time in February. (People also graduate in summer some time in August but it’s much rarer because most Japanese enter uni in Spring (April). People who graduate in September are either those who extend their uni year or foreign students who enter during the Autumn intake in September because that’s when the English program school year start (in my department, at least… I entered in April and graduated my Master's 3 years later in February but it’s a somewhat special case.)

Anyway!!! Yoh graduates ‘this’ year so, that means his lease will be up too and it makes perfect sense for him to move with Segasaki around late March or early April.

The proposal: mid-Feb — late-March three years ago

I place the proposal at the end of Winter, beginning of Spring in year minus-three. Weather-wise, it’s plausible because we know that the day of the proposal was unusually warm for the time and February is easily one of the coldest months in Japan. And, even though Spring starts in March, warmth doesn’t really come around until later in the month or even April. (It snowed in March, once. In Tokyo. It rarely ever snows in Tokyo but it’s been snowing every other year since I came here.)

I also headcanon that Segasaki graduated (his Master's) that minus-three year while Yoh is only in his second year of bachelor’s. My logic is that because he’s graduating, this could be his last desperate attempt to lock Yoh down and make sure Yoh’s spoken for (Yoh’s just a dumb-dumb who doesn’t recognize a proposal lol). It also makes sense for the proposal to come up at that period if we think about it… Mizuki’s graduating and Yoh could be asking him about his jobs after graduation and whatever else which, in turn, allows Mizuki to start a conversation about Yoh’s plan for the future. It’s also not uncommon for peeps to hang around uni before they start their jobs (for whatever reasons) so it makes sense to me that the proposal was in some time between Mizuki’s graduation in mid-Feb till late-March, when Yoh’s about to start his new school year and Segasaki will have to start his job. (This could be when Yoh finds out Segasaki will be working with EW and starts watching the broadcast religiously.)

Job prospect-wise, it’s pretty solid. Segasaki’s confident that he’d be working in a high-paying job when he proposed to Yoh. If Segasaki’s graduating in year minus-three, then he’d extremely likely to already have a job lined up for him; he’s just gonna immediately enter the workforce right out of uni. This is very common in Japan. University graduates are socially expected and pressured into working immediately after finishing their studies which is why it’s common practice for them to start their job-hunting process during the second to last or last year at uni. It’s generally advised that they start second to last year in uni (B3 if you’re in your bachelor’s and M1 if you’re in your Master's) because the process is long and drawn out and it could be a very long time before a job is offered. It’s also ill-advised to do your job-hunting in your final year because final year can be very hectic for some; some B4 and M2 students need to write their thesis, do graduation projects, finish up their experiments, etc. it’s not fun to add job-hunting into the mix. So, even if the proposal happened right after Segasaki’s graduation, Segasaki would be confident that he’d be able to support both of them just fine.

Why I don’t think Yoh did his job hunting

I honestly don’t think Yoh did his job-hunting because:

As I talked about here, Yoh became anxious about jobs and job-hunting in general in Episode 5 and this could imply that he didn’t go through the process while he was in university. You could do it on your own, but it’s difficult. That’s why many students take advantage of the recruitment offered by universities. Many also make use of other public recruitment services.

Yoh’s the kind of person who does things at his own pace and does what he wants. I.E. 1; Yoh is a slow walker who has always walked slow. Segasaki made a point of commenting about his pace but instead of increasing his speed to match that of his sempai’s, he continued at his own pace and said he’s been told that before, and Segasaki was forced to match his pace. Yoh’s aware of his snail's pace, he was criticized for it but said fuck all and went about walking at his speed anyway. This is very not-Japanese. I.E. #2; He doesn’t really care to socialize. That’s it, that’s the reason. I.E. #3; my guy used 俺 (ore) with the stranger seniors. Peeps aren’t expected to drop 俺 (ore) and go for 僕 (boku) when talking to seniors anymore but they’re strangers… he should be using 僕 (boku). I.E. #4; he made fucking curry rice for a sick person because that’s the only thing he can make. Curry rice. He could’ve googled how to make porridge but nah, curry rice lol. I.E. #5; arguing with his editor that the ‘I love you’ dialogue is necessary in his 20 pages long porn manga. I don’t man, Yoh’s not afraid to do his own shit and he totally seems like the kinda guy who’d fuck around and find out when it comes to his career. Which I think is why Yoh’s secured that he has a patron in Segasaki and decided not to do his job-hunting.

Yoh & Segasaki’s first meeting: May — June four years ago

I think Yoh first ‘met’ Segasaki four years ago; that’s his first year in university, and that would explain why he hasn’t seen Segasaki sooner. I placed their first meeting in May — June mainly because of their outfits. Everyone was wearing a Spring palette when we first saw them at the cafeteria, but they weren’t wearing any thick outer layers so that’s probably very late into Spring and early June. Their clothes also became progressively lighter throughout the flashback and, by the time Segasaki was sick, there were more layers on everyone again, esp. Segasaki, indicating that Autumn could’ve been around the corner. (Though this could just be due to the timing of the filming!)

Also, Segasaki’s friend asked for his notebook, implying that there’s a report/assignment/quiz coming up that he needs to prepare for. So, at least we know it’s definitely not the start of the semester.

On Mizuki’s Master’s level education

I’ll be real… I’m entirely biased when it comes to Segasaki’s educational level. I have a Master's and I’m an old, I want my fav to be an old too haha. (I’m currently doing my PhD, it’s… going somewhere lmao)

Anyway, I didn’t make him have a Master's just because… I think Segasaki has a position of seniority in the workplace despite his young age: he led the discussion and (I presume) implemented the new weather reporting system thing. He was also comfortable with rejecting the welcome dinner (歓迎会 kangeikai) for Hiyoshi… and his co-workers, who are obviously his seniors, just accept it as it is. You don’t just reject invitations to after-work dinners/parties, 飲み会 (nomikai), especially not the kangeikai. It’s a party to welcome new members; rejecting it means you’re not a team player and unwilling to bond with your co-workers to cultivate a harmonious workplace relationship, which is a no-no in Japan (please read up on 和 (wa) if you’re interested in learning why), and definitely a no-no if you’re not high-up in position. (There’s a lot of politics going on in the background that I’m not very familiar with. I understand the most basics; like filling superior’s glasses, ‘hanging out’ with superiors, being frank and up-front and coming away unscathed, power-harassment bosses forcing people to drink, etc.) So, Segasaki must’ve entered the workplace in a relatively high position; which is achievable with a Master's.

Interesting tidbit #1: did you know, you don’t get fired from a workplace in Japan? If the company wanna lay off people, they usually just close the entire department lol crazy, I know, but it’s legit. It’s why people can be employed for life at work.

Interesting tidbit #2: not many Japanese students go for a Master's but when they do, they usually enter right after their Bachelor’s. However, there are certain majors where having a Master’s is advantageous and students are generally encouraged to go for it. I.E. my major, Architecture and Urbanism, and Civil Engineering. These majors typically take 5 years of undergrad for students to qualify as practitioners. In Japan, their Bachelor’s only lasts for 4 years and a 2 years Master’s will put them on the same level as other practitioners from abroad. (I did 5 years of Undergrad in Architecture and Urbanism and another 3 years for my M.Arch degree lol and there are years to go until I get my Doctoral RIP)

wrote this whole thing bcs of this silly lil fic lmao

#taikan yoho #my personal weatherman #yoh tanada #tanada yoh #yoh x segasaki #segasaki x yoh #segasaki mizuki #kohei higuchi #mashiko atsuki #noona96n #mpw meta

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tieflingkisser · 3 months

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Internal memo reveals Anti-Defamation League surveillance of leftwing activist

Self-styled anti-hate group tracked Black organizer who opposed links between US police and Israeli military

The Anti-Defamation League has surveilled leftwing activists and “regularly tracks, profiles and sends threat assessments of individuals” it perceives as a problem, according to an internal email obtained by the Guardian.

[...]

The memo shows the ADL collected information on a Black Indianapolis activist, Tatjana Rebelle, who worked on Deadly Exchange, a national campaign against an ADL-backed program to send US police officials for training with the Israeli military. Rebelle, however, said the local campaign on which they worked did not target the ADL, and they had never directly engaged with the group. In the email, which included a picture and personal information about Rebelle, ADL head of security Chris Delia concluded Rebelle was “a radical with antisemitic and hateful views” but was “not a threat” to the organization. Still, he recommended the file be referred to the organization’s Center on Extremism, which tracks, in its words, “extremist trends, ideologies and groups across the ideological spectrum”. Rebelle, who left the Deadly Exchange program in mid-2018 to work with a youth climate nonprofit, said they were “terrified” for themself and their family after learning about the 2020 assessment. “It scared the shit out of me,” Rebelle said, adding that it has had a chilling effect on their activism and what they say publicly. “It stopped me from moving forward because I don’t want to put people in my life at risk – I work with youth, so it stopped me in my tracks.”

[...]

The ADL has come under fire in recent years as it has leveled charges of antisemitism against leftwing Jewish groups, Black Lives Matter, Palestinian rights groups and other organizations critical of Israel. It has increasingly lobbied for federal legislation on antisemitism, some of which critics say is intended to target leftwing Jewish and Palestinian rights groups. It has become more aggressive since the Gaza war’s outset, but its credibility has also suffered – most recently, Wikipedia’s editors found the ADL could not be trusted to give reliable information on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

[...]

Rebelle said they had been previously targeted by local white nationalists and pro-Israel groups that tried to get them fired from jobs or removed from speaking engagements, but the ADL memo came as a surprise because the group was not involved her work in Indianapolis. Rebelle said the ADL was “targeting black queer folks”, and is evidence of a larger problem with the organization. “It’s the personal way that they described me … [it] is the same way we would describe a white nationalist or a lone shooter profile,” Rebelle said. “I really was trying to build community and liberation, and we never harm anyone.”

#adl #anti defamation league #news #usa #racism #zionism

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some-random-fandom-chick · 8 months

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People You Want Go Get To Know Tag Game

tagged by: @keirou-kun

tagging: @silenthillmutual @nerdyspacedude @peacerisendove @halekulan-i @johnnlocked @rex-rp

Last Song: Tír na nÓg by Celtic Woman according to Spotify

Favorite Color: Blues and purples. I'm especially fond of the pastel shades

Last Movie/Show: That I actually purposefully sat down to watch and paid attention to? Not just caught snippets of what my house mates are watching while I'm working? ...uhhhh closest I can get is a TikTok series that the guy moved onto YouTube called Immersion Breakers. Essentially a dnd adventure going off the rails because the wizard and the wizard's player had a moment of brilliantly timed accidentally borderline metagaming insight

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: Sweet-Savory. I have a huge sweet tooth but that also needs to be balanced out with a little salt once in a while

Relationship Status: Happily engaged for 7 years~ And dating my other partner for... 5 years now I believe

Last Thing I Googled: ...okay don't judge me for this, I was commiserating with an editor friend about the shit they see in their job... and that led me to googling the length of the vaginal canal...

Current Obsession: Batfam. Just in general. Their stories, their dynamics, the good and the bad. It's slowly stretching out to the rest of DC too

Last Book: UnOrdinary. Fantastic comic on webtoon, I read it every Thursday when it comes out ^_^

Looking Forward To: Spending a year in Canada living with my fiance and in-laws and hopefully starting the immigration process or even just nailing down some potential wedding details

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frostironfudge · 2 years

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Tenebrous - Loki (AU) - Chapter Seven

Pairings: Vampire! Professor Loki x Fem!Reader

Characters: Loki, Thor, Fem OC, Reader

Warnings: angst, mentions of depression, discussion about depression, allusions to previous self harm (not graphic), allusions to non consensual occurrences by secondary character, fluff, a bit of steamy things between reader and loki, angst between thor and oc, a new good character, steamy stuff between thor and oc, Minors DNI

Word Count: 8011 (i have no words cause all of them went in this chapter)

(posted with the old editor)

Dividers: @firefly-graphics

< Chapter Six || Chapter Eight >

Main Masterlist || Fic Masterlist || My AO3

Chapter Seven - Are You Mine Anymore?

Thirteen Months Ago.

“Thor Odinson. You absolute information withholding shit head!”

Thor feels Nia’s wrath across their bond before he hears her. Her heels echo and the scent of her hairspray lingering amongst the silage of her natural sweet scent gives him knowledge today was a mock trial she participated in; Thor feels scared.

“Oh you should be afraid!” Nia narrows her eyes, throwing her bag onto the couch, Thor stands holding the box of nuggets.

“Exactly what is it you are mad about, babydoll? I—,”

“Don’t you dare use nicknames.” She pushes her index against his chest, jabbing it for effect.

Nia finds her gaze move to the box of nuggets, her anger dulling only minutely, she grabs the box, eating one, her glare still affixed upon him.

Thor thickly swallows, following her actions.

“Nia—,” Thor shuts up at her intensifying glare. She shoves the box back into his hands.

Thor looks down at the empty box; how did she eat them this quickly? Always?

“You did not bother telling me, me, your girlfriend, magically chosen forever soulmate that my best friend and your brother are soulmates? I have to find out from her!” Nia raises both hands upward, hair moving with her.

“I thought it would be best if you didn’t know—,” He tries defending.

“Best?” Nia shakes her head.

“You would only try to make it happen, you know Loki’s stance on—,” He runs a hand through his hair.

“That buffoon,” Nia pinches the bridge of her nose, then looks at her soulmate.

Thor wants to laugh, the corner of his lip twitches.

“Don’t you dare laugh, you’re equally a buffoon.” Nia can’t help but ignore the mirth flowing from Thor towards her own heart.

Sometimes she hated the bond.

“Babydoll, you know his stance, I know you want what is best for Y/N but Loki needed to realise and act upon his feelings on his own accord.”

“So he confessed now at the ending of the creatives course?” Nia confirms.

“He did tell me, landing her into trouble is not what he wanted. Faculty student relationships are frowned upon.” Thor’s blue and brown irises soften, Nia sighs, cupping his cheek.

“He better not hurt her.” Nia warns, “I will stake him.”

Thor snorts, “I’d enjoy seeing that.” The mental image of Nia running behind Loki with a dagger too hilarious.

“He won’t tell her about our truth for a few months.” Thor lets her in on the plan.

“Ugh, it is frustrating keeping this a secret. I’m literally living my teenage fantasy.” Nia giggles, kissing Thor’s cheek.

“Wait,” Thor pauses, doing a double take over the conversation.

Nia grins sheepish as her slight coercion comes into light.

“You extorted information.” Thor now narrows his eyes at her.

“I wanted to know if he is serious, I don’t want my best friend hurt because suddenly Loki found his actual soulmate.” Nia shrugs.

He sets the box down, picking her up with ease, her legs wrap around him.

“And what fantasy is that?” Thor raises an eyebrow, Nia bites her lip.

“Oh just, having a vampire boyfriend who keeps me up at night.” She brushes her lips against his, the temperature difference urges something primal within her.

Their wanton gazes meet, the bond hums electrified, beckoning them closer.

Nia moans as Thor’s hands grab her ass, moving up her back and his lips meet hers with need.

They don’t make it past the hallway.

They also manage to also break the coffee table.

Loki and Y/N enter the house to find small splinters of oakwood everywhere accompanying loud moans from the second floor.

“We can just go to the coffee shop or….” Y/N suggests horrified.

“Yes, I um—,” Loki pauses as another loud bang resounds, his palm rests at the small of her back, guiding her back to his car.

Present.

“Thor Odinson.” Nia’s voice is calm. Their bond however, is screaming at him.

“Nia, I was going to—,” He tries speaking only to be cut off,

“When in these past eleven months, were you going to choose to share vital information?” Nia crosses her arms.

“Nia there was a lot going on…” Thor sighs, reaching out to grab her hand.

Nia moves away from him.

He feels his heart ache.

“No, I cannot believe you. We are supposed to be a fucking team. Telling each other everything. Sticking together.” Nia’s voice grows louder with each sentence.

“Nia, please let me explain, I cannot tell you, it has to be the choice of the witch.” Thor steps closer towards her.

She moves backward.

“Nia.” Thor finds himself wanting to beg her not to move away. It ached and hurt keeping things from her but he had to, withholding for protecting was counterproductive but what he needed to hold back he did.

“And what about this?” Nia holds up the polaroid of the wall with the message in blood.

“Where did you find this?” Thor grabs it away from her.

“When were you going to bother telling me?” Nia presses on,

“Nia, this is not the time nor place.” Thor clenches his jaw.

He can pick up the argument ensuing between Y/N and Loki.

“She’s awake.” Thor adds.

“Are you avoiding answering me?” Nia raises an eyebrow.

“I thought you would be worried about your best friend.” He runs a hand through his hair yet again. A frustrated sigh escaping him.

“You promised you would tell me. What else are you withholding? Did you know why Loki left? Is that why guilt surges through our bond when we have to pick Y/N up from those dumps?” Nia’s eye brim with tears.

Thor contemplates, eyes widening when he hears Y/N knows about the memory obscuring done all those months ago.

“Answer me.” Nia draws him back to present.

“Nia,” Thor closes his eyes.

“You let him go? Knowing the consequences?”

“It, I didn’t understand how it got this way, they did not even form the bond fully…” Thor opens his eyes, Nia shakes her head.

“You could have stopped him.”

“Nia, he had to leave, Alexander, is a bigger threat to—,”

“She could have died Thor. Does he realise he could have lost her? Do you realise you could have lost your friend? I could have lost my best fiend?” Nia’s voice breaks, sobbing fully.

The bond overcome with sadness and pain.

Thor wraps his arms around her.

Nia tries pushing him away, he only wraps his arms tighter. His eyes prick with venom.

“Why?” Nia questions after a few minutes of being in his embrace.

“Our father,” Thor feels sick at the word, “Eliminates covens, and the coven she belongs to have been kind to vampires apart from the ones of Alexander’s vampire lineage.”

“He would have killed her?” Nia looks up at Thor, he nods somber, wiping her fresh tears.

“Was there any other way?” Nia wonders.

“He could have turned her.” Thor whispers.

“Why didn’t he? Oh come on, he doesn’t want to be with her?” Nia scoffs.

“Nia, he, look the bond being messed with would prevent—,” Thor stops eye widening in realisation.

“What?” Nia grabs his forearm.

“We need to head home, I need to speak with everyone, Zemo included.” Thor retrieves his phone shooting a text to everyone to meet up.

“What,” Nia begins and Thor looks at her intensely.

“I believe I know what has been occurring because of her drug use.” He completes.

“You think it was blocking her witch instincts as well as the bond?” Nia mirrors his theory.

“Yes, but knowing Loki was gone this information only a few of us knew. Even her witch status.”

Thor and Nia’s gazes meet as they try and process who could be the leak.

Fifteen Months Ago.

“Ah, I trust all is well with your mate, Loki?” Zemo smiles warmly despite the current predicament he finds himself in with the brothers.

Thor rolls his eyes, crossing his arms leaning against the opposite wall.

Don’t hit him, don’t hit him, don’t hit him. He chants.

Loki looks between the two, he sits in the chair placed in front of Zemo, the dagger still in place.

“How are your ankles and wrists?” Loki looks over, the injuries are healing albeit slower.

“I’ve been in better health.” Zemo licks his dry lips, humming as the gesture irks Loki.

“Why must you imagine, I’m preying upon your unclaimed mate?” He teases the green eyed vampire.

“As I remember you were trying to do the said action.” Loki feels his vampire side ebb to the forefront.

How dare he try to touch her?

“Unclaimed are free reign as I remember.” The bound man raises a defiant eyebrow.

“There are levels to it are they not?” Loki reminds the rule.

“You and I know when a witch is an unclaimed mate rules are foregone.” Zemo reiterates.

“Not when the witch is a coven member’s mate.” Loki glares, red rims surrounding his irises.

Zemo laughs, the red dies down.

Thor gazes at Loki.

He knows something more.

Should I enter his mind?

His powers are weakened, go forth.

They brothers look at their guest once more.

“Go on, read my mind.” Zemo taunts.

Loki rises, towering over Zemo. Locking his eyes with him, Loki begins to navigate through the crevices of Zemo’s mind.

“Ah, look at that.” Zemo tuts, “Such a profound moment in the bonding and you made her forget.”

“Shut up.” Loki mutters, continuing onward, flashes of his humanity.

Loki feels his shoulder being tapped, he turns a woman stands there,

“Are you here to find us?” She questions.

“Who are you?” He questions.

The woman opens her mouth to answer, but pauses then hurriedly scurries away when she looks past Loki.

“I suggest your not uncover that path.” Zemo walks up to him.

“Your mind is much more organised from what I previously recall.” Loki muses.

A small table with tea and pastries manifests in the centre of the room.

Zemo walks gesturing for Loki to follow.

They sit, Zemo pours the tea, “Milk, sugar?”

“One cube.” Loki watches intently.

“What will I put in? A mental attack of herbs?” He smirks, shaking his head, “You wound me.”

Loki waits for Zemo to sip his tea before he does the same.

“Do you know the extent of my ability, Loki?” Zemo sets his cup down, wiping the corners of his lips with a napkin.

“You capture the essence of people. You know intimately their fears, strengths, what do not speak.” Loki takes a breath, jaw set.

“Correct, much as your ability to enter the mind, I am more akin to the soul. You could say we make a dynamic duo.” The Baron sets the napkin down.

“We did, once upon a time.” Loki agrees.

“Then you will know, I know your fears and wants intimately.” Zemo muses.

“And you will know I know your mind likewise.”

Zemo smiles wickedly, Loki mirrors the feature.

“Then you will be finding about what I plan for Alexander.”

“Luna shall know.” Loki warns.

“Luna is aware of what I plan. I only wish to know if your brother shall join in upon the fun.” Zemo’s eyes hold an angered intensity.

“He shall not be opposed.” Loki finds himself grinning.

“We first need to discuss your witch-mate Loki. If the young vampire returns to Alexander, then you know it is all over.” Zemo warns.

Loki retreats from his mind.

Thor is eating a burrito when Zemo and Loki return to the physical space.

“What I got hungry.” Thor shrugs, “So when are we letting him go?”

“Ah, ever the just.” Zemo chuckles as the dagger is removed and he’s handed a bottle of rose salve.

“I know when deals are in my favour.” Thor affirms.

“Either claim her, or you must leave her out for Alexander to deem worthy or not,” Zemo slowly stands, moving his injured joints.

“Zemo.” Thor warns.

“It is true, he needs to decide. If not her fate rests as Luna’s was or the way Mir suffered, the consequences of Alexander’s actions induce only harm.” He completes.

“Mir claimed her mate.”

“She did not turn her soon enough.”

Loki thinks over, would it be so hard to accept Y/N as his mate? Apart from a few shared interests he doesn’t understand what would place her for him.

“Loki, mates aren’t forged just for the interests.”

“Get out of my soul.” Loki grumbles.

“She’s your mate because you were forged for her too.” He pats his back.

Thor wonders if this conversation would be of any help.

“I must catch hold of the rogue.” Zemo announces walking to the staircase.

“If I find a semblance, an iota of betrayal,” Thor’s voice is deep, laced with warning.

“You will feed me to the wolves.” Zemo completes.

“After taking my share.” Thor gives a menacing grin.

The shorter man looks at Loki, who shrugs, “Fair warning.”

Zemo nods then blurs out of view.

Loki feels pain across the bond.

Thor notices the wince, “Nia says Y/N is in a lot of pain.”

“I think we should check up on her.” Loki asserts.

“Brother, I think you need to go alone to see her.” Thor prompts.

The raven haired vampire contemplates, he knows no matter what the outcome he does not want her hurt, bonded or not.

Nor does he want Alexander to grasp at her.

He cannot have her be damned to eternity by a selfish man.

He cannot let her go, either; today having Y/N in his arms, the way she fit with him.

Could the bond take her will into account?

Could they fall in love despite the bond?

“Have you decided, brother?” Thor places a hand upon his shoulder.

Loki nods, looking up at Thor, he smiles at his younger brother.

— — —- —-

Y/N stifles the hiss that wants to makes its presence known, she finds it weird how she can feel those stars dancing across he chest as if something good is nearing her.

“Hey.” Nia knocks on the doorframe.

“Hey.” Y/N replies, sitting up slightly.

“You have a visitor.” Nia tries hiding her smile.

Y/N furrows her brows, “Who?”

“It is Professor Loki.” Nia giggles when her best friend blushes.

“What? Did you invite him in? Is he sitting?” Y/N sits up then winces when the pressure comes on her wrist.

“Nope.”

“Why is he outside?” Y/N stresses.

“Look at you blushing!” Nia teases.

“Nia.” Y/N exasperates.

“He wanted to know if you’re awake, he had to leave the hospital earlier so he was still worried about you. Said he would only come in if you were comfortable.”

“Oh, thats, that is sweet of him, yeah, let him in. He can come inside.” Y/N looks over her room, nothing too messy, just the little kibble midnight dropped outside her bowl.

Y/N hears muffled conversation occurring on the staircase.

“How is she doing?” Loki enquires as Nia leads him to the room.

“Quite a bit of pain, honestly the first two hours back home were fine. Now it is starting but the pain medication is still two hours away.” She explains, then curiously ponders, “Was everything alright at home? Thor said he’d come by but hasn’t.”

“He’s wrapping up a few loose ends should be here soon.” Loki gives her a smile.

Nia knocks on Y/N’s door, giving her a teasing look before Loki enters into view, and the stars cascade over her chest as though celebrating Loki’s presence and distracting her from the pain.

Loki smiles at Y/N, his earlier hesitation diminishing into a dull bygone when he feels the joy across the bond.

“Well I have a mock case to prepare let me know if anything is required.” Nia looks between the two before leaving for her own room.

“Gave me quite the fright, Y/N.” Loki takes in her room, a few pictures lining the walls, pet food bowls in the corner.

Her jewellery hangs in a display case on the dresser.

“I honestly don’t remember much of what happened, it is this mushed up blur.” Y/N shakes her head as if to clear the block.

“You did hurt your head as well. The preliminary report said that…” Loki pretends to recall as she nods. He feels relieved the memory is obscured.

“Oh shit um, sorry, uh you can um sit on the chair you will just have to move the book, I can’t—,”

“You hold onto these,” Loki holds out a bouquet of flowers, daffodils.

“Th-Thank you, Professor Lo—,”

“Please, just Loki.” He corrects.

“Thank you, Loki.” Y/N smiles bringing the flowers closer to softly trace the petals.

Loki picks up the book kept on her chair,

“Van Gogh?” He enquires sitting down still holding the book.

Y/N nods, resting the flowers upon her lap, “I’ve found his paintings to be very intriguing.”

“Most people find his story intriguing.” Loki comments, tracing the spine of the book.

“It is but they tend to think that, he painted during his depression episodes, while it is said he actually painted during his recovery phase.” Y/N looks up at Loki, his gaze softens.

“They say he had tried consuming yellow paint and other chemicals for finding happiness.” Loki adds.

“Another reason why him painting during those periods would not have been viable. I can understand his need for wanting something to make him feel happier.” Y/N shrugs.

“Have you experienced depression?” Loki wonders, his heart saddens at the thought that she would have to suffer.

“I never received a formal diagnosis, but after my parents were having several issues, I realised I was in a downward spiral, I took towards my own, ‘yellow paint’ of sorts to feel something, anything.”

Loki watches her tug the sleeve of her jumper.

The bond holds a reminiscence of the hurt and numbness as Y/N remembers the past few years.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, please know you have me to listen, if at anytime you need me to do so, for you.” Loki gently places a hand upon hers which rests upon the bouquet.

They sit quietly, Loki observes her biting her lip. While deep in thought.

“Do you know daffodils signify new beginnings?” He questions, coaxing her out from the ravine of thoughts that never did her any good.

Y/N smiles down at the flowers again.

Then at their hands.

“What new beginning have you brought them for?” She looks up at him, Loki wonders how could her eyes hold so much hope?

A beginning that could end in tragedy.

“I’m holding out hope, for a beginning with someone actually.” He says instead, giving her a soft smile that she had only seen grace his features when they had chance run ins at different places.

“I hope it works out.” Y/N says, giving him a warm smile of her own. Her hand turns and their fingers intertwine, some how it feels as though deja vu holding his hand.

“I have an inkling it will.” Loki strokes the back of her hand with his thumb.

——- —— ——

It had been a week, Loki visited Y/N nightly bringing in her coursework on the days he held class. He’d take centre stage in her room, Midnight would watch from her spot on the top shelf when he recited poems and dictated annotations.

Often giving Y/N a wink, a smile as her cheeks would tinge pink and he’d hear her heart rate increase.

On the days when coursework was not involved they would talk, Loki seemed to always ask the questions. Deflecting giving answers for certain questions which she would ask, especially about his family.

Y/N stopped asking too personal questions she’d never stray from lighter surface topics of conversation. The wall Loki had left up between them did set her off to feel an uneasiness that maybe these moments were just that, moments.

Not a memento for keepsake of a blooming relationship.

That this was not a start of something that Y/N found to be tugging upon her chest each time her eyes met with his green ones.

Or that somehow she would know when he was at the door or that she would send him a text just as his thoughts were upon her.

Loki knew the consequences of either choice. He wanted to stop himself, pull away before things got too complicated.

Y/N was showing him facets of herself akin to a gemstone.

All he gave her in return were two dimensional responses.

Maybe she would choose to leave.

“Are your parents planning to visit?” Loki asked once as they finished watching Insidious. Nia and Thor had excused themselves to her room earlier.

“No, um since the divorce they sort of well…” Y/N gestures with her hand trying to indicate fading away.

“Do they know you’re hurt?” His eyes fall to her leg resting on the coffee table with a pillow, the two of them sat on the couch with the popcorn bowl next to each other.

The doctor (and Doctor Strange at the request of Loki) both had cleared her for limited weight bearing movements and Nia wanted to celebrate with a movie night.

Y/N nods, Loki’s hand twitches wanting to rest upon hers.

“I’m sorry.” He says, making a fist of his hand.

“Not a big deal, they said they will come in for graduation.” Y/N looks back at the credits rolling,

“Oh um, I’m cleared for coming back to class as long as I wear the pneumatic boot to offset the weight.”

“That is good news. Will I see you in class tomorrow?” Loki studies her form, her eyes stay absentmindedly upon the names gliding across the screen.

“Yes.”

Loki frowns, the stars floating across his chest die down.

“Are you upset, love?” His hand reaches for hers and she looks at the limbs, how his skin looks against hers and how incredibly right it feels having him next to her.

“No, just, tired.” Y/N bites her lip, she could cry later at night, the past ten days filled with his visits could be a memory she allowed herself to cherish.

Loki realises she is lying, what could be this upsetting?

“Are you sure?” The worry in his voice makes her look at him.

She nods, “I um, I did the assignment.”

“You finished it in a day?” Loki quirks an eyebrow but has a proud smile soon taking over his face.

“Well I didn’t have anything better to do so um,” Y/N shrugs.

“Six thousand words of a short story isn’t a small feat, that too in two days.” He commends, “When can I read it?”

Y/N’s eye widen, “Oh um on submission day.”

“You’re done with it, yes?” He gazes at her.

A nervousness takes over the bond.

“Yes…”

“Then I can read it.”

“My laptop is out of charge.”

“Did you use names you do not want me to see?”

Loki smirks when his suspicions are confirmed with her silence.

“Did you use my name?”

“No…” Y/N groans internally knowing her voice gives it away.

“Now you must show me.” He presses, voice light.

“You can read it when I submit it.” She presses.

Loki pouts, Y/N looks at him in disbelief.

“I’ve used Thor and Nia.” She backtracks.

“Oh.” His shoulders slump in the slightest.

“It gets sort of intense so I well, I don’t want you to read the characters as them.” She concludes.

For moment it is silent, Loki leans into the bond to know what her feelings are, he isn’t surprised to know that she is keeping up a charade.

“Could I use your laptop to check my email?” Loki looks at her.

Y/N nods, “It’s upstairs.”

“I’ll be right back.” He paces through the hall and is near the middle of the staircase,

“I thought it had no charge?” Loki smirks and bounds upwards when realisation dawns across Y/N’s face.

“Loki!” She bellows, getting up to follow him half limping, “Don’t you dare!”

“Your date of birth is the password, I’d hoped for better security.” Loki calls out mirth lacing his voice.

“Loki please.” Y/N tries again, before entering the room, he can’t read the story.

“ ‘His green eyes captivated her own, every time they met. As though invisible strings pushing them towards each other.’ ” Loki reads out, admiring the warm pink tinge taking over his Y/N’s cheeks.

“Loki—,”

“ ‘Opposite sides of the coffee shop, a black coffee for him a hazelnut latte for her. Sometimes her eyes would trace his frame, she would make up stories about him as he would read through the papers in his hands, the red ink pen moving rhythmically to his thoughts as he reads the words unknown to her. She smiles to herself as she observes his eyes aglow, he scribbles something across the page, something positive. The negative scribbling was harsher and his green eyes harboured a look of disdain accompanied by the furrow of his brow.’ ” Loki pauses, she noticed this about him?

“Just it is not done—,” Y/N reaches for the laptop, Loki shifts it away, she loses her balance.

Loki’s arm wraps around her waist, he knows the movement should knock a human down so he strategises.

They fall with a small thud onto her bed, her laptop safe as well.

Y/N looks at him, they lay sideways. Her eyes flicker to his lips, he licks them, her scent begins a crescendo into his senses.

He’d held off feeding for tomorrow, her heartbeats loudly, demanding his attention.

Y/N finds Loki tightening his grip upon her ever so slightly and pulling her closer.

She leans in, her eyes meeting his, asking is this okay?

Loki swallows, she’d seen him beyond moments spent together, beyond the times he kept his wall up.

The memory of their almost first kiss enters his mind.

Loki leans in as well, when their lips brush a shiver run up Y/N’s spine, Loki’s palm follows the direction the shiver. Warmth blooms over her skin at the movement.

Their lips meet, eyes closed, the stars shine bright around them.

Y/N cups Loki’s cheek as he deepens the kiss. The warmth from her palm etching itself upon his skin.

The taste of honey, mint intermingle with a sweetness so pure.

Y/N shivers again when his tongue sweeps along her bottom lip. Her lips part, a soft sound making past as his body moulds against hers.

The sound reverberates through Loki, he nips at her bottom lip, drawing out the sound again, a low growl rumbles from his chest, his grip tightens upon her.

Mine, mine, mine. The bond chants for him.

Y/N’s fingers tangle in his hair, the stars seem so pleased at the closeness. She’s wanted to be able to do this since so long. She whimpers audibly as his lips kiss along her jaw, trace over her neck, his nose brushes over her skin.

Why does he feel slightly colder than her but the heat that is searing by his actions has her wanton.

“Loki.” A breathless whisper, prayer even.

He hums against the sweet-spot found upon her neck, her grip on him tightens in response.

“You’ve bewitched me.” He admits, meeting her gaze, “I wish, I did not have to leave.”

The mirage breaks, of course, Y/N thinks.

How could this be any more than a fickle fantasy?

“Stay?” She pleads.

Loki closes his eyes, “Y/N.”

“Loki.” The plea with his name etches itself onto his un-beating heart.

Before he opens his eyes her lips meet with his again.

She would take any memento he would leave in her name.

Fourteen Months Ago.

The class next day of their kiss was cancelled. So was the next one. Culminating to a week of radio silence from Loki.

‘Hey, I hope you’re okay.’

‘Loki could we meet?’

‘Loki, please respond as soon as you have a moment.’

‘Thor says you’ve gone on a personal leave… Is everything alright?’

‘Is this because of what happened?’

Y/N stares at the phone, locking it with a huff. None of her messages answered. Did she cause a boundary issue?

Resting her head on her palms. It was stupid, stupid to have thought that anything could happen between her professor and her.

Nia spots her glum best friend in the corner booth.

“Heard you got the day off again.” Nia slides in, Y/N raises her head slightly then just rests it back down in defeat.

“Come on there will be other professors to admire, that Doctor Strange guy from the hospital seemed handsome.”

“He’s the director of the Physiotherapy Department aka my masters course director.”

“Well you do like authoritative figures.” Nia teases.

“Nia.” Y/N groans.

“Look, you kissed he chickened out no big deal. If he cannot respect you he shouldn’t attempt to be with you.” Nia shrugs nonchalantly, if they weren’t soulmates the heartbreak is more tolerable for Y/N.

“Its just so, frustrating? One minute he gets all close and caring and affectionate and then he just closes off. Never speaks of his family, I understand its difficult but, and then the whole coming home to teach? Then the kiss?” Y/N takes a sip of the abandoned coffee grimacing at the taste.

Nia’s phone chimes,

‘Hey, Loki is back therefore I will not be able to join you for dinner. I’m so sorry, I’ll visit later tonight.’ Thor’s text reads.

‘I will be asleep.’ She types back.

‘I know how to wake you up. ;)’

She blushes looking back up at Y/N, who is still in despair.

“Okay how about a girls night? Bowling and then arcade games?” Nia offers.

“That does sound good.”

“Settled then. Tonight at six.” Nia declares grinning and shooting a text to Thor about their plans.

Nia knew they were plotting against Alexander Pierce. If it were upto her she would just stake the man, vampire, monster. The stories Thor told her about what he went through played on her mind for days after.

Their conversion was horrific the abuse that a vampire named Brock Rumlow inflicted upon them had Nia wishing death upon the vampire.

Thor’s voice echoes in her mind, “There are all kinds of deviants that are created when the conversion happens, Rumlow is the worst kind, he has no extra powers but his actions and abuse…”

Despite his strength Thor had shivered at the memory, Brock’s hands everywhere, unyielding, bruises that would be healed by the conversion but his unsolicited non-consented touch. It had been torture to have those carry forwarded into immortality.

Nia sighs, lips pursed.

She feels bad for Y/N but if Loki is just messing around before finding his soulmate, she does not want her best friend to be a pass time for a vampire.

— — — —

The day is off for Y/N, she’s losing at bowling against Nia, she never loses.

Nia is winning despite throwing five gutter balls.

“You’re really off of your game today.” A voice comments from behind them as the two women wait for the pins to reset.

Y/N turns at the familiarity, “Bucky!”

“Y/N!” James Barnes greets happily, “How is the leg of the poetess?” He walks closer smiling widely.

“Eh, getting better, this boot is annoying though.” Y/N and James look down at the said item.

“Is it as bad as the boot makes it look?” His eyebrows furrow with worry.

Nia looks between them a grin spreading on her face.

“Oh no, the boot’s the worse aspect of it.” She brushes it off, Nia’s shift catches her eye.

“Oh um, Nia this is Bucky—James, and Bucky this is my best friend Nia.” Y/N introduces, James puts his hand forward Nia takes it.

“Why the two names?” Nia looks up at him and James feels he is being analysed.

“I prefer my friends calling me Bucky.” He answers, “You’re the to be kick ass lawyer?” He places a knowing guess.

“Yes. I am.” Nia grins at him.

“Y/N here, sings praises of you.” James chuckles, as they let their hands fall back to the side.

“Oh I’m hardly that great. Yet.” She brushes off.

“I heard you made the mock judge and jury cry. That is hardly not great.” James looks at Y/N.

“Haven’t seen you in two weeks, poetess.”

“Yeah I was,” she points to her boot.

“Still offended you didn’t let me come over.” He pouts.

“Bucky—,” She exasperates.

He raises his hands in defence, “I know, I know.”

Nia raises an eyebrow.

“He does extra classes and teaches at night school.” Y/N explains, smiling with adoration at Bucky.

“Just try to help out and stay on top of things.” He shrugs, a pink tinge on his cheeks.

“That is really amazing.” An idea pops up into Nia’s head, “James are you here alone?”

“Oh un yeah, my friends kind of gave me the last minute boot I was leaving then I spotted Y/N sitting, thought I’d say hi.” He explains.

“Would you like to join us? We were heading for dinner anyways…” Nia prompts and Y/N raises an eyebrow.

‘What are you doing?’ She mouths to Nia.

Nia ignores her waiting for James’ reply.

“I wouldn’t want to intrude.” he looks from

Nia to Y/N.

“You won’t be intruding.” Y/N shakes her head, he smiles.

“Then okay, alright. Where are we headed?” James offers his arm to Y/N.

She takes it frowning to herself when it feels as though the stars that were familiar to her slide away into a dullness as though blurred.

The trio find themselves outside the nearby diner, Nia up to no good decides it is as a good time as any to execute her plan.

“Oh shoot.” Nia groans, “I completely forgot about this,” She scrolls across her phone as James and Y/N stop to turn.

“Is everything alright?” She looks over Nia’s nervous form.

“No I, theres this assignment I was supposed to meet my group for, it slipped my mind.” Nia looks apologetic.

“Oh no thats too bad… We can do this another time if you need to leave.” Bucky says sullen.

“Oh no no, you guys carry on without me.” Nia pushes.

“You sure?” Y/N looks at her worried.

“Yes definitely.” Nia smiles brightly.

Y/N’s eyebrows furrow.

“I’ll have her back home safe.” James promises, Nia turns to smile at him.

“I’m positive you will, well have the blueberry cheesecake for me.” Nia saunters off to her car. Quickly shooting a text off to Thor about her playing cupid.

Bucky looks down at Y/N, she meets his azure gaze.

“She set us up didn’t she?” He questions, a half smile on his face.

“I think she did.” Y/N lets out a chuckle.

“Are you okay with the set up?” His eyes hold hopefulness.

“I am, I also have Nia’s card so dinner is on her.” Y/N giggles and Bucky joins in with his laugh.

“Well I will be sure to get her a thank you card.” Bucky tells her as they settle into the booth.

“She would like that.” Y/N smiles at him.

The waitress approaches them with menus and begins to recount the specials.

— —- —-

On the other side of town, Thor stares at his phone at Nia’s latest act as cupid.

“Oh brother.” His tone sullen.

“What?” Loki pipes up from the hall, tucking away the plan sheets into a folder.

Zemo having left about half an hour ago. He could go to meet Y/N now.

“No-nothing.” Thor tucks his phone into his pocket.

“Brother you have that expression, akin to when you watched Marley and Me with your mate.”

“That was a saddening film.” Thor stands by his defence.

“It was but what has gotten you seemingly akin to that?” Loki is in front of his brother in a flash.

“You will just pry it out of me,” The elder sibling unlocks his phone handing it to Loki.

Loki stares at the picture of his student James Barnes standing too close to Y/N, their arms linked and gazing at each other.

Underneath read the message Nia left for Thor.

‘Your brother really doesn’t know what he has lost but in a way it is good, because if she isn’t his soulmate then I don’t want her heart to break when he does find his actual mate.’

Loki finds his chest constrict, he tries searching for the bond which is now seemingly a dull hum in the background.

“I—, why?”

“Nia says she was distraught that you weren’t in contact.” Thor explains.

“I was gone for work, I made sure the class was informed.” Loki can’t get the image of their hands linked out of his vision.

“Yes but, given what transpired between the two of you… I believe a personal approach would have faired in your favour.” He offers.

“I need to seek her.” Loki vocalises his determination.

“I’ll ask Nia where they are…” Thor raises his phone to call his mate.

Therefore, Loki finds himself in the diner in a booth away from them but his hearing picking up the conversation.

It is easy to slip in and out of sight amongst humans. Part of being designed to be amongst them to hunt them was to blend in with the being that he was once.

James and Y/N are halfway done with their meals, her laughter draws a smile upon Loki’s own lips, he knows James is grinning widely.

“So wait, wait, wait, you changed your date of birth and they let you into the theatre?” James says in awe.

“Yes well I turned the number around so my birth-year remained the same but month changed. Effectively turning me eighteen.” Y/N laughs.

“Did the guard question you?” James takes a bite of the cheesecake they were sharing.

“Okay so don’t laugh alright?” Y/N closes her eyes as the embarrassment takes over.

James begins to laugh at the notion.

“Bucky!” She shoves at his arm playfully.

“Okay, okay, poetess, no laughing.” Bucky runs a hand in front of his face as his joyful expression turns serious.

Loki moves his palm from the edge to the wooden table, not caring for the indents.

“Alright it so happened that the date and month I switched to were the very same date Nia and I were there so the guard goes Happy Birthday!” Y/N covers her eyes, “And I go um what?”

Bucky lets a laugh slip, “Sorry.” He shoves a piece of cake in his mouth to keep quiet, she laughs before continuing.

Loki watches her demeanour so carefree, free-spirited.

“So then the guard says, ‘it is your birthday… is it not?’ Then Nia responds that, ‘why yes indeed we are celebrating that only.’ Then she looks at us for a solid minute, both of us are scared because we aren’t eighteen and trying to sneak into an R rated movie.” She pauses, Bucky has his eyes wide.

“You’re taking a dramatic pause now? Oh god, Y/N come on!” Bucky demands expectantly.

Loki knows this story, he heard it but not with this much enthusiasm from her. Though he was not as open and responsive as James currently.

“Okay, okay, so then she hands my ID card back and says ‘enjoy your birthday!’ And we never shuffled away faster than that day to the confectionery stand.” Y/N completes taking the last bite of the cheesecake.

Bucky laughs with mirth, “That really makes me feel as though I thought wrong about you.” He admits with a sheepish grin.

“Care to elaborate Mr. Barnes?” She rests her head on her palm looking up at him curiously.

“Well we met in creative writing correct? The way you write, so effortlessly layered and your pieces honestly blow me away. I always thought you’ve grasped at love and it ended heartbreakingly. Pegged you for an introvert. Not that it is a bad thing at all.” He bites his bottom lip.

“I, I don’t know what to say… Your work is phenomenal.” She admits.

Loki wants to snort, it is mediocre at best. Her work far surpasses the class.

“Thank you.” She says, her throat tightening with emotion.

“Have you?” Bucky questions, the air around them turns heavier.

“No, um it mostly stems from my parents… Not the best marriage.”

“I’m sorry.” He places a hand upon hers.

The stars dull a little more for Loki as he entertains the possibility of losing her.

“I um.” Bucky reaches over to her, his thumb brushing at the corner of her lips, “Bit of cheesecake.” He brings the remnant to his own lips. The gesture reddens her cheeks as she is unable to take her eyes away.

“I hope you know this is not counted as our first date.” He says, lightening the air not wanting to seem to forward.

“Why not?” Curiosity laces her voice.

Bucky smiles, “First off all, I didn’t get you flowers, secondly I’d take you to a bookstore. We would give each other a genre each, find a book for one another and then go on a coffee date, meet up for our second date to discuss the books.” He grins.

“I—How do you know that would be something I’d enjoy?” Y/N’s jaw dropped, that had been an intimate thought as she had trailed her hands over the spines of books when the entire class was at the local bookstore purchasing or borrowing the books entailed Loki’s syllabus.

Her heart beats faster at the thought of her Professor, Bucky is excellent company but this past week she had missed Loki deeply.

“Call it intuition.” Bucky answers smug.

“Spot on, honestly.” Y/N lets out a long exhale.

Bucky only smiles at her.

Loki wonders if she would fall for James rather than him. He decides then to run into them in passing.

Bucky gets up first after they pay with Nia’s card all the while laughing. He keeps a strong grip on Y/N not letting her take too much weight on her foot.

“Do you have to take any meds?” He asks as they reach his car. He opens the passenger side for her.

Y/N spots a familiar Mercedes, the one that stayed parked outside her home.

“Y/N?” Bucky follows her transfixed gaze, then Loki walks past them a take away bag in hand.

“Oh look he’s back in town, class probably will happen next week.” Bucky comments and Loki turns, her breath catches, as though drinking water after traversing the hottest of deserts.

Loki’s green eyes move over her. The world begins to blur out of view again. It feels as though he can breath again. Feel again.

James’ palm against her cheek breaks the mirage.

“Hey you okay?” He inquires.

“Yeah um my pain meds are due, I think I feel an ache.” For Loki she wants to say, but reserves her words.

Loki tries prying into James’ mind,

“Hey Professor!” James waves thwarting the attempt.

“Hello Mister Barnes, Miss Y/L/N. I see you’re up and about.” He walks towards them, the stars step forward.

“Yes um, received clearance.” Y/N answers, clearing her throat.

Bucky’s hold on her waist tightens, Loki’s eyes catch the movement.

Equal defiance ridden green eyes meet blue.

Y/N notes the change in the air, shivering as it drops several degrees.

Loki tilts his head, as though observing an event unfold.

“I believe Mister Barnes you should get Y/N home, I’ve emailed an assignment for next week. I believe getting a head start is beneficial.” The professor turns leaving the two students getting into the vehicle.

Loki watches them exit the parking lot.

“Don’t you think he’s a little weird?” Bucky wonders as they drive toward Y/N’s home.

“He’s something.” She mutters.

Bucky walks her to her door, he stands with his hands in his pockets as she turns in her doorway.

Y/N leans on the door for support.

“I had fun today, thank you.” She smiles at him.

“I did too, but I’m holding out for our actual first date.” He gives her a smug grin making her smile.

“We’ll see about that.”

“Oh that means definitely.” He teases.

“Maybe.” Y/N blushes, as his eye gleam with happiness.

“i’ll see you in class, Poetess.” Bucky waves goodbye, she watches him back out of the driveway, then closes the door.

She’s at the halfway mark on the steps when the doorbell rings incessantly.

“Did I forget something in your car—,” Y/N’s words catch once more.

Loki stands gaze intensely trained upon her features.

“What are you doing here?” Y/N manages to speak, finding her voice.

“I’ve come to speak with you. I seemed to have left without regard.” He says with purpose, watching her reaction.

“So you want to talk after you see me on a date with someone else?” Y/N raises an eyebrow.

“No, I, I happened to be there, I was out of town.” Loki sighs, knowing this is going to be a difficult conversation.

“Without your phone?”

“I was busy.”

“Kept in touch with your brother though.”

“The matter concerned him, I didn’t have time for other things I don’t mean to call you a—,”

“I’m not someone, who you play with then toss away when you’re bored, Professor.” Y/N seethes half a mind to shut the door in his face.

“Y/N, I did not mean to imply—,”

“Your ego was bruised seeing me with Bucky. You were, I don’t know looking for something to while away your time. I can understand that maybe it was curiosity that prompted you to kiss me but, fuck, ignoring me then implying that I’m not important—,”

Loki steps inside, cutting off Y/N’s rant.

“I know I haven’t been the best at conveying my emotions, be it opening up about my family or wholeheartedly laughing at your humour at tales, or articulate how your wit, writing, how you take my breath away.”

Y/N stares at him.

“I am closed off for reasons I cannot express, but I’m at your doorstep well in your house, promising that I can and will communicate better. Just, allow me, the chance, Y/N, please.” His heart breaks at how small he might sound, he willed never to be vulnerable, half of him wanted to dive into her mind to know but the other half of him willingly held back.

Y/N’s eyes usually gave everything away, today Loki could not read a minuscule of them.

“I, I need, time.” She flounders for the answer a more definitive time but comes up short.

Loki wonders if this is how she felt, unknown of what hangs above them for them as a pair. Did a week truly make this vast difference?

He nods, mouth setting into a thin line.

“Take as much of time as you may need.” He murmurs, walking to the ajar door.

“Loki?”

He turns, she sounds hurt, his chest feels hollow blaming himself.

He doesn’t say anything allowing her to continue standing at the threshold of the home.

“Did, was I on your mind at all?” Y/N knows it is a silly question but she wanted to know if he even thought of her.

The sincerity in Loki’s next words brought the stars crashing down upon her, the bond glowed brightly in promise, Loki could feel as though a bright molten silver could run through his veins. As though the brightest moonlit night descended upon the two of them,

“The entire week the thought of coming back to you got me through.”

-x-x-x-x-

A.N.: let me know what you think pleaseeee, literally finished writing and proof reading before posting!

taglist open! just comment below to be added!

tagging: @anemois-hiraeth @stevesmewmew

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oppatxtme · 4 years

Text

Christian Yu: The Eve

x Christian Yu x

Note: Read at Your Own Risk ~~ (ง⌐□ل͜□)ง Type: One Shot [ masterlist ]

A/N: This is a request from an Annon. I know it took a while but hope y’all like it. BTW. Happy New Year friends! ♥

-----

'Is she not coming to work?'

"Hey, Scott!" Christian called his friend when he saw him walked past his door from the hall.

Scott walked and stop to peek at Christian's studio.

"What's up?" he asked while still looking at his phone.

"How's the photoshoot yesterday?" Christian asked about the shoot scheduled for Live and you are one of the editors.

"It went according to our theme. But it lasted longer than expected because it suddenly snowed a little during the shoot." Scott explained. "Why?" he managed to look away from his phone screen and look at Christian.

"Oh, so, what time did you guys finish?" Christian asked not answering Scott's question.

"Maybe around 3 am," Scott answered. He decided to sit on the sofa inside Christian's studio - thinking that this might take a while. He knew Christian and asking questions without answering his - only means that somethings going on.

"I see. So I guess most of the crew will not be coming today since you guys finished late." Christian said while taking a spin at his chair.

"Not really. I think they'll be here doing the edit and all." Scott said still looking at Christian.

Christian tried to avoid Scott's gaze.

"Really? So maybe I can take a look at the scene later with Y/N." Christian said and turn his back from Scott to face his monitor.

'Smooth.' Scott thought and can't help but smirked at his friend's childish game. He's avoiding directly asking about Y/N because of the drunk accident happening before.

*** 3 weeks ago, the crew decided to go out for a dinner then drink after to celebrate Christian's debut. But just as everyone getting ready to go home. You're so wasted that you confessed to Christian without minding the few people remaining outside the pub.

All were shocked because they didn't expect you to confess at all. All of them have an idea that you have feelings for Christian for years - but Christian's so dense and treat you as a little sister at that time. He did not expect it and he was so dumbfounded that he laughed it out and saying that he only sees you as his lil'sister.

"Thank you, Y/N - but you're my little sister that I never had. I'm sorry." Christian said as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Yes, you were drunk at that time. And you wished you forgot everything that had happened to that point. But it was impossible. Now you know that it was all a lie when people said they forget everything that happened to them when they're wasted. LIES!

But even if you remembered everything - you acted that you forgot about it. It was not like you, but being rejected face to face - it fvcking hurts!

You can't afford to lose your dream job just because of your drunken mistake.

You acted that everything is good between you and Christian - but it is noticeable that you're putting a distance between the two of you.

****

"I think you can check the raw ones with her assistant later." Scott get up from the sofa and was about to leave.

"Huh? Why her assistant? Where's Y/N?"

"She's taking a rest for the day. I think she catches a cold during the shoot. I'm planning to check on her later. We know how she can be when it snows. You're welcome to join me if you want." Scott dropped a teasing tone towards Christian.

"Ah. Okay. Just call me when you're going." Christian said not noticing Scott's teasing.

----

Christian can't focus on his work. He keeps ending up thinking about you.

He looked at his phone - checking if Scott text him about going to your place but he sighed when he sees nothing.

He can already admit that this is not like him at all. He told you that he only sees you as a friend - he even regards you as his little sister. But something inside him disagree.

'Do I like-love her?' Christian questioned himself. But it was cut-off when his phone rang.

It was from Scott.

"Hey. Wait a sec - I'll just save my files." Christian said right after answering.

"About that, I can't go to Y/N right now. Mr. Ahn called and requesting a meeting with Dabin." Scott said.

"Did you call Y/N?" Christian asked.

"Not yet. I tried calling to see if she's alright but she's not answering. Maybe she's just sleeping. We can visit her later - after work."

"No. I can check her now since I already shut down my PC." Christian said as he walked out from his studio.

Scott smirked because he knew well that Christian never shutdown his PC at his studio.

"Okay. Call me when you get there." Scott ended the call.

---

You were dreaming about someone was knocking at your door and keep pressing the doorbell. The doorbell gets louder every time that it woke you up.

Then you realized that it was not a dream but someone really is knocking at your door.

'Maybe it's Scott. He did mention that he will drop by'. You thought as you tried your best to get up.

You opened the door.

"Are you planning on breaking my door Sco-C-Christian! How..?" you can feel your face burning up.

"I came instead of Scott," he said avoiding your eyes.

"I see," you said. Both of you just standing there between the door. 'Okay, this is awkward'.

"Are you okay...?" Christian asked and managed to meet your eyes.

It's hard for you to stop the cough because your throat is just itching.

"I'm okay now, so you don't have to..." you looked down. Not really wanting for Christian to see you at this state. But suddenly your vision got dizzy and that made you lean forward.

Christian caught you.

"You're not okay at all." He said.

You can't tell if he's mad or worried. He guided you to your bed. And you keep coughing all the time. You want to stop so he can't see but it's really not that easy.

'I'm here now, but I don't know what to do for her. I can feel that Y/N doesn't like me here, I'm sure this situation is stressful for her'. Christian thought. 'I guess I need to try and help her feel better...'

"Did you already eat something?" Christian asked you while you're fixing the pillow at your back to sit properly.

"No," you said.

"Good thing I brought rice porridge. Eat this, then take the medicine." He said while taking out the porridge from the paper bag he had.

"I'm fine." you insisted. You just want him to leave and you can sleep. But for some god's play - your tummy decided to protest.

"Just eat." Christian tried his best to not laugh. He handed you the container for the porridge.

"Okay..." you said helplessly.

---

"Thank you for the porridge..." you said as Christian took the container from your hand.

"Now take the medicine, and go to the hospital tomorrow for an IV drip." He said as he hands you a glass of water.

"A-*cough* cold like this will be over once I slept on it. I don't have to go." you took meds and the glass of water.

"You're not going to go? When you're this sick?" Now he really sounded worried.

"I'm really all right, Christian... You can go now..." you insist as you tried to put the glass on your side table but he stops you and leans forward to get the glass from your hand. And put his hand at your forehead. You automatically closed your eyes when you felt the warmth from his hand.

"No way. At your condition right now..." Christian said. "You're burning up..." he was shocked because he was not expecting you to be this sick.

"I'm fine..." you opened your eyes. Then there you realize how you and Christian's face is so close. You can't help but blush.

Christian realizes the situation and immediately put away his hand from your forehead. "J-just go to the hospital. Darn it!"

You can't help but smile a little. You find him cute.

Christian stands up. "Try to lie back down. I'll go get a wet towel for you."

"Okay..." you said. You guess that it's no use arguing with him. As you lie down. You can't help close your eyes as you tremble. "Ugh... it's cold..."

"You're cold?" Christian saw you.

You opened your eyes and he was standing at the end of your bed. You got up.

"Just a little... I just need to put more clothes on." You said as you tried to get off the bed and walk to your closet.

"No." Christian stopped you from getting up. "You have to bring your fever down. All you need is to change into a T-shirt and shorts instead. Wait. I'll get that for you."

"Huh? W-what?"

Christian walked towards your closet and as if he owns it, he easily finds your clothes and throws it at you.

"I'm turning the light out." and he did turn off the lights.

You have no choice but change. You felt that your clothes already wet from your sweat. When you finished changing, Christian sit beside your bed and gently put the wet towel on your forehead.

"Ian, you should really go now..." you said in between your coughs.

'How can I go when you're like this?' Christian thought as he looked at you.

You felt him get up. You closed your eyes. 'Finally, he's leaving.' you thought.

Christian sighed.

"Move over a bit." you heard him.

You opened your eyes not really understood what he said. But the next thing you know that Christian slip his body beside you - in the bed. Your body automatically moved from the side to give him space.

Now Christian is hugging you from the back. If the two of you are dating - then this might be normal - cuddling you as you're feeling cold. But the two of you are way far from dating!

'Shit! What is he doing! What is he thinking?! I don't know if this will help me or it will make it worse.' You can't help but worry. You need to calm down because you're not sure if Christian can feel how your heartbeat is running wild.

"You'll be less cold like this," Christian said. Every word he said, you can feel the warmth of his breath from the side of your ear.

"C-Chris-tian... you don't really have to-"

"Just stay still. I'll leave once you fall asleep." Christian said firmly. "You'll be asleep soon since you took the medicine."

'How in God's way can I be still in this situation?! God-someone please save me!'

"Y/N. Close your eyes and go to sleep," Christian said.

You closed your eyes. But really not know how you can fall asleep with the fact that you can feel his body heat.

You don't know if it's the fever or because of him, but you feel dizzy and your mind is a mess.

But one thing is clear.

Your heart is beating so fast and the warmth from Christian's arms that you don't feel cold anymore.

You tried to close off your heart - as best as you could. But Christian's warmth is slowly melting down the walls you barely created.

"Christian Yu... why are you doing all this for me? It's like... as if you love me... How can I push you away if you're going to be like this?" you froze when you realized that you voice out your thoughts.

Christian's arms around your waist tighten.

"You're right," Christian said as he leans closer that you can feel his breath from your right ear. "I do love you and I was a fool when I denied that fact - something that obvious. I know for a long time that I treated you differently from anyone else. I'm sorry if I pretend and fight what I was feeling just because I don't want to admit that what I said before was wrong."

You tried to move to face him but Christian stopped you and buried his head between your neck. He also holds your hand and tightens his embrace.

"Please. Let me hold you like this as you fall asleep. I promise I will leave as soon as your temperature goes down."

You said nothing and just pulled him closer to you.

'I think this is a good reason to love the snow season.' You slept smiling while at Christian's embrace.

---

[ masterlist ]

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wyn-n-tonic · 3 years

Note

It’s me, the 30 day sex challenge anon, back with another thought...on the complete opposite end of the spectrum...how would the lads handle an abstinence challenge (a la 40 Days and Nights—a Josh Hartnett masterpiece)? Like, who’s cool as a cucumber and who is a horny hot mess by day three?

Oh. Oh. Oh no.

We'll go with my same five babies from before, just to make this easy.

Francisco Morales: You approach him carefully about it, not wanting to hurt his feelings. Sex has always been great but, lately, you're just feeling exhausted with life and work and house and kids. When you fall into bed and your passionate, amazing wife guy of a husband wants to eat you out or help you relax, you let him and you love it because you love him... But you've been thinking lately that you don't necessarily enjoy it anymore because you always get it. You tell him it's not him, genuinely, that it's you. That it's life, that it's everything and you're afraid you're numb to the passion and sensations you felt and you want to detox and reset. He's sad, because he thinks that it is something he did but he understands.

You make it almost a whole month when you come home one day and find him there, cooking dinner while your babies sit at the kitchen table having an animated conversation with him. Arousal pools within you immediately, you are absolutely feral for this man--your husband, the father of your babies. "Baby," he greets you, "come taste this and tell me if it needs anything." He holds his finger out with a bit of sauce on it like he normally does but instead of just licking it clean, you swirl your tongue around the tip a few times, doe eyes up at him never breaking eye contact. You rush through dinner and bed time routines so you can get to the bedroom faster. You both swear it's the best sex you've ever had and resolve to put distance between your escapades in order to achieve this high again.

Din Djarin: You brought it up because your relationship has been constant sex since you crossed that bridge and you don't want him to become desensitized to touch the way he was touch starved for so long. You fall back to the quiet intimacies you shared in the beginning of your relationship. He loves your soft hands so much and he gets hard every time you touch him, no matter where you touch him, but he's a good boy. You make it the forty days but only barely as a particularly heavy make out session on the 39th day turns into foreplay turns into sex. You only notice the day the next morning when you wake up, him completely bare, chest pressed to your back on the tiny cot of the living quarters.

Javier Peña: He hates this. What the fuck are you guys doing? This is is something you picked up from one of those fucking magazines and he's livid. He's gone to type out a strongly worded to the editor of Cosmo or Vogue or some shit every goddamn day. He threw the nicorette out, he's mainlining packs of Marlboro Lights like they're the only things tethering him to this life and they are. Because he can't even touch himself according to the rules of this stupid fucking challenge. Challenge? Against who? If he finds out Steve had anything to do with this, he's putting a bullet in that man's dick. He counts the days down on the calendar. When he gets home on the fortieth day, he's takes you on the kitchen floor, eating you like a man starved and he has been. He's determined to pull at least three orgasms out of you with his mouth because he knows the moment you touch him, he's going to blow and he can't leave you unsatisfied too.

Marcus Pike: It was his idea! He thinks that your relationship can benefit from pursuing other hobbies with one another and not just sex. You take cooking classes, dancing lessons, fucking wood working tutorials. You're stuck at home with canceled plans one night because the beer garden got rained out so you decide to cook one of those fancy dishes you learned together. It's been a month and you're losing it, breaking down with wine soaked sobs asking if you did something wrong that made him want to do this. The smoke alarm goes off as he's reassuring you. Once dinner is sufficiently ruined, he pulls you into his chest and tells you that you did nothing wrong, it was just something stupid he read online and thought it would be an interesting experiment. He takes you to bed and makes love to you while holding your hand so that you know he has nothing but love for you. Your stomach growls against his hand in the shared shower half an hour later and he pops out to order a pizza for you both.

Jack 'Whiskey' Daniels: "Oh, Sugar, I don't think I'm going to be able to keep my hands off of you for more than forty seconds." You tell him to figure it out so he takes every out of town mission that Champ will give him.

#headcanons #headcanon #i'm not tagging this wtf #pedro's boys #ask o

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jae-daddy · 4 years

Text

Play (3)

im jaebum mini series

one / two / three / four / five / six (final) masterlist

pairing: jaebum x reader x jinyoung genre: friends, angst, jealousy plot: you and jaebum have been really great friends. things have been going smoothly because neither of you were in a real relationship, flings? sure, but girlfriends/boyfriends? no. so when Jaebum starts going out with Emma (a bitch), you can’t help but act out <3 a/n: im sorry, I didn't yugyeom would turn so wild yikes. hope you enjoy <3 but this fucking gif!!!! omfggggg AHHHHHHHHH

Okay, so things were not going according to plan.

You had to bring back Yugyeom, aka Dickdown 9/10, back into the game.

It had been three months since Jaebum officially started going out and nothing was changing. They were continuing as normal; Emma being a bitch and Jaebum acting as if he loves her.

It was quite sad really to see Jaebum slowly lose his sunshine. But he had chosen this path, but his destination will not be happily ever after with Emma. It will be with you; you are going to deviate him from the path he was taking towards his doom.

After endless nights spent in your room, alone, after you sent the boys away. You would think about how to make Im Jaebum realise that he, in fact, loved you and not Emma the bitchy hook-up girlfriend.

It took time but you finally figured it out.

You had always known that you wanted to fuck Jaebum one day, but you knew that day would come eventually. But when you saw that window close, you realised it needed to be now. So, you just have to show Jaebum the window to fuck you was closing too, then he’ll leave Emma, and rail you and you’ll live happily ever after.

You needed a boy to do this with, and after endless swipes and scrolling through your contacts, you decided you needed him back. Jaebum already knew Yugyeom existed, and his dick down game was amazing too. If you had to be loyal (while going out with Yugyeom to make Jaebum jealous) you would preferably do it with someone who can make you cum two times (even you couldn’t do that).

And no, by make you cum twice, you don’t mean make you cum the second time after a little relaxation. No, he made you cum twice at once; cum, a little touchy touchy, cum again.

It was truly fucking magic.

Yugyeom was truly magical. You didn’t know why he lacked that one point.

Oh, well.

But it seemed like the plan was working well.

Jaebum studied Yugyeom as Yugyeom politely chatted with Emma.

He didn’t care the first time Yugyeom showed up to the catch-up dinners. He acted surprised and thought it was you just calling him back for a good time.

But then the third time happened, and the fourth. And now as Yugyeom sat next to you for the sixth time, Jaebum was confused and bewildered seated in front of you.

You were a true master brilliance.

You sighed as you sipped your wine gracefully.

You scrunched your face at the taste and swapped it with Jaebum’s whiskey. Jaebum gave you a pointed look, but you pouted and Jaebum rolled his eyes as he took a sip of your wine.

“Seems like things are going great,” Emma poked, trying to look for holes in the relationship between Yugyeom and you.

You beamed at her as you leaned against Yugyeom, “As you said, Emma, love happens when it happens.”

Jaebum left out a scoff from the side, and you bit the inside of your cheeks to stop yourself from grinning in victory.

“Aww,” she cooed, her lips smiling but eyes gleaming with evil. “How did you guys get back together?”

“It’s quite romantic, really,” Yugyeom smiled lovingly at you, making Jaebum’s face twist with distaste as he quirked his eyebrows in disbelief. You nodded along, satisfied with how delightfully this was working out, “Y/n called me up a month after she broke things with me. In the time we were separated she realised how much she loved me.”

“Really?” Jaebum croaked, giving you a knowing smile. He knew how much bullshit that was. During that one month away you were doing perfectly fine, in fact, you had told Jaebum all about your life going well and all the other guys you met.

There was no rain for a single moment in that short one month.

Yugyeom nodded, smiling innocently. He held your hand as he smiled at you softly. You looked away from his guys feeling ashamed.

You were such a bitch.

Absolute trash.

He was such a good guy with really fucking amazing sex skills and you were just using him in this little game.

You met his eyes, trying to smile as he squeezed your hand comforting you, “It’s okay. We’re together now.”

“Oh, are you exclusive?” Emma leaned forward with interest. You recognised what she was doing. She was doing this so if there were any feelings in Jaebum’s heart for you, they would go away because you were with someone else.

Silly her, Jaebum was just as fucked as you. If anything, this would draw him in closer to you.

“Not yet,” you replied curtly, you eyes darting to Jaebum’s before you lowered them to your drink, trying to avoid Yugyeom's.

“Not yet,” Yugyeom echoed, his voice a bit heavy.

“Oh,” she pouted, faking sympathy. “Take your time. It took Jaebum and I a while to get there, and look at us now.” She held his hand in hers and kissed the back of his hand.

You grimaced.

“How’s the book going?” You asked, after a while. Jaebum looked at you a small smile on his lips.

“It’s coming along great,” he beamed at you, his eyes almost disappearing. “Jinyoung is a great editor, he listens to what I want.”

“Has he said anything about Persephone yet?” You asked as you popped a fry into your mouth. Jaebum held his mouth open and you fed him one. “He acted like such a know it all.”

“He is knowledgable, y/n,” Jaebum teased, making you roll your eyes. “He hasn’t told me yet, but he’s having a meeting tomorrow, so I’ll know for sure the day after. You wanna come along?”

“Can I?”

“Sure, just don’t try to fuck him,” Jaebum shrugged. You watched him carefully, his tone was playful, but his eyes avoided yours and his shoulders looked tense.

“What are you not telling me?” You narrowed your eyes. Jaebum looked up with you, his eyes wide with pretend innocence.

He was hiding something.

“Does Jinyoung want to fuck me?”

“Maybe- No.” He answered sternly. “No, you cannot sleep with him.”

Yes. Fuck yes, please. You want a piece of that smarty good-looking cocky asshole.

“So he wants to?”

“Y/n,” he warned.

That’s not a no.

“Oh my, he was kind of cute.”

“Stop,” he groaned. “You cannot sleep with my editor.”

“I won’t.”

You lied.

“You won’t?”

Not until he was done with the book at least.

“I won’t,” you held both your hands up, as you stared at him in accusation, “I will not ruin your book, Jaebum. You have no faith in me.”

“I do, y/n,” Jaebum gasped, trying to hold your hand but you took it away. He reached for it. He caught it and held it as his thumb drew soothing circles at the back. “I have faith in you-”

“But not him because he wants to rail me?” You smiled, and Jaebum smacked your hand away with an annoyed smile.

“You are so annoying.”

“You love me,” you blew him a kiss, and he rolled his eyes.

You chuckled looking over to the side to find Yugyeom and Emma watching the both of you.

Shit, you forgot about Yugyeom.

“Get used to it,” Emma laughed lightly, but there was no smile on her face as she brought the glass to her lips, “They tend to forget other people exist too often.”

Jaebum stared at the table, biting his lip as if he knew he would have to deal with this later. He bought the wine glass to his lips and began chugging it down.

You peered over at Yugyeom who stared between you and Jaebum, “Have you both ever fucked?”

Jaebum choked spraying the wine over you. You gasped, freezing as you felt droplets fall down your face.

“What the fuck, Jae?”

“Shit,” Jaebum laughed, coughing. You tried to hold on to the anger but it slipped away as you found yourself trying to stop yourself from laughing. Jaebum coughed harder as he began choking on his laughter, “Sorry.”

You both fall into fits of laughter as Jaebum reached over and dabbed your face with a napkin, “God, you should’ve seen your face y/n.”

“You’re lucky I enjoy you too much to kill you,” you snorted taking the napkins and dabbing yourself dry. “You’re such a cunt.”

“Hey, blame your nine outta ten!” Jaebum laughed holding up his hand. You froze as you bit your lip.

“Nine out of ten?” You felt Yugyeom stare at your face.

“Oh, that was his rating wasn’t it, y/n?” Emma added, you turned to look at her and then straight across at Jaebum.

He told her.

It wasn't a big deal, but he fucking told her.

“What, so you share this everyone?” Yugyeom snorted, his voice edged with anger.

“Hey, man, calm down. it’s not that serious-” Jaebum spoke softly, trying to diffuse the tension.

You kept looking at him, how could he tell her?

“Yeah, Yugyeom,” Emma added, her voice fast-paced with phoney panic. “She does this for all her one night stands. You’re one of the highest, or was it the highest?”

Her eyes met yours. You noticed that tiny twist at the corner of her lips.

She wasn’t trying to show Jaebum how in love Yugyeom and you were to get him to stop liking you. She was trying to ruin you and Yugyeom.

That conniving little bitch.

“Oh thanks,” Yugyeom got up, throwing his napkin onto his plate.

Shit.

Fuck.

What are you supposed to do? Are you meant to chase after him?

You don’t even like him that much. It was only a matter of time anyways.

But what happened here wasn’t good, you did hurt him. But at least it was a good rating, a fucking nine out of ten. It could’ve been worse, imagine if he was a four, that would’ve been embarrassing.

But he was obviously hurt enough to storm out of here. You should stop him, shouldn’t you?

At least for the sake of the plan.

And it was a good time, you can’t just let him walk away hurt.

“Yugyeom, wait,” you called out as he disappeared out the door. You shot up from your seat, tossing your napkin on the table, “Shit.”

You ran after him like a lunatic person. The lady at the counter tried to stop you, but you pointed to the table, “My friends and my purse is there, I’ll be back.”

You didn’t wait for her to reply and ran out of the building. You found him a few feet away and you chased after him. Your feet began burning in the heels, and your heels disgracefully slapped against the pavement with loud clacks that echoed through the late-night streets.

“Yugyeom, stop,” you rasped as you reached for his shoulder. He turned when you touched him, and you held in a gasp.

You are a terrible person. You are a horrible person.

He looked at you with so much hurt and betrayal that it made your heart stop. You didn’t even love him, and you felt so terribly bad for the way you hurt him.

“I’m sorry, Yugyeom,” you breathed, as he gently pushed your hand away from his shoulder. “This was before we broke it off. I told him in the beginning, I didn’t think he would tell Emma. I’m sorry.”

Yugyeom just shook his head as he stared up at the starless night sky.

“Come on, Yugyeom,” you snorted, trying to bring in some humour. “It was a good rating anyway-”

“No, just stop.”

“What?”

“Just stop,” he laughed, his eyes not focusing on you because of how enraged he felt. “You don’t like me. I’m not stupid, y/n. I’m not blind. I know you like that shithead in there.”

“He’s not a shit head-”

“Oh, he’s not?” Yugyeom snorted, he chuckled darkly, without any humour, “He just acts like that and gets away with that.”

“What are you talking about?” You shook your head confused.

“He and his girlfriend have been nothing but assholes to me from the day I stepped inside that restaurant with you. His girlfriend being a bitch- I don’t know why the fuck she being that way, but she was. But, him. He was being an ass because I was with you. I was the one fucking you. He couldn’t stand that-”

“Yugyeom, we’re just friends-”

“Right, just friends. Fuck, you’re stupid if you think friends are like that.”

Omg Yugyeom, that is exactly what you have been saying since day one. But you need to make Jaebum realise that, so let’s go back inside, Yeomie.

“Let’s just go in,” you pleaded, sighing.

“No,” he shook his head.

“Okay, let’s go back home.” You reached for his hand, but he jerked it away, forcefully making you stumble back. You bumped into something and regained your balance.

“I was really willing to give this a try y/n,” he spat at you. The sweetness and loving-goodness on his face vanished as he scoffed at you, “But you are nothing but a fucking slut. You don’t have a heart, you’re dead inside. You should really stop fucking other people to fill that empty void inside you. You will always remain as lonely as you are right now.

“No one will ever be able to love you. And you know what? You won’t remain attractive forever. And when you can’t get dick anymore, you’ll realise just how ugly you are inside. The only thing you’ll be left with is some fucking disease or worse, a child who would hate having a worthless whore like you as their mother-”

You can’t think of anything. It’s all blank. There’s not even a ringing, there is no bright whiteness blanketing your mind. There is nothing as you stand there soaking in the words he said to you.

It hurts...

You saw the leer on his lips start to grow into a grin, as a frown settled on yours.

But you didn’t say anything.

And then, you saw a fist fly towards Yugyeom’s face. It was all in slow motion.

You saw the panic and fear in his eyes as he focused on that strong fist flying towards his lips; that smirk falling as he cried in slow motion.

You heard the crack. You saw spit fly out his mouth. You saw his eyes shut as he groaned falling to the ground in pain.

And then the world sped up again.

You saw Jaebum climb onto him. Yugyeom’s collar was tight in his grip as he landed another punch on his face. Yugyeom cowered groaning as he started to bleed red.

And then another punch, and another.

Your hands were shaking as you pulled Jaebum off Yugyeom, “Jaebum, stop.”

You pulled Jaebum off with all your weight, your fingers wrapping around his knuckles as they whitened around Yugyeom’s collar. He pulled Yugyeom up with him, his eyes dark with anger.

You pushed them apart and squeezed between them. You turned to Jaebum, holding onto his wrist to make him drop his hold on Yugeyom.

“Jaebum, please stop,” you cried, and he glanced at you for a moment before staring back at Yugyeom.

Jaebum looked at back down at you as you pleaded. His jaw tight as he shook Yugyeom by the collar, you trembled in panic. Jaebum leaned in close to Yugyeom, his front pressing against your body. You placed your hand on Jaebum's chest to hold him back.

“Get the fuck out of here,” Jaebum sneered at Yugyeom. Yugyeom snorted, the blood smearing over his cheek. “Don’t you dare ever come near her again! You hear me?”

“Jaebum,” you begged softly, as he let Yugyeom fall back with a jerk.

Yugyeom stumbled back but found his balance, he walked away holding his hand up, “Keep your slut.”

“You fuck-” Jaebum snarled towards him, but you stopped him, grasping his front.

You made him look at you, as you held his cheek. You shook your head frantically, and Jaebum calmed down as his raging eyes met yours, “Please don’t.”

Jaebum bent to meet your eyes as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. He held your face delicately as his eyes searched over you, “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?”

“No,” you whispered, shaking your head. You stood there letting Jaebum check over you. He finally took a deep breath as he took a few steps away from you.

He looked up to the sky before he closed his eyes. He ran his hands through his long dark hair before linking his fingers at the back of his neck. His head faced the ground, his eyes closed, taking deep breaths in.

You stood there on the empty pavement, watching Jaebum as he calmed himself down.

You were shaking.

You were shaking too much, and you felt so cold. You were shivering, but it was a nice summer night tonight. Your teeth were clattering too much, for the wind to be the cause of it.

Your heart was still pounding in your ear. Your hands shook by your side as you waited for Jaebum.

You just wanted to go back in and finish your dinner. You wanted to return back to normal.

“This is exactly what I have been saying, y/n,” Jaebum spoke, his cold voice cutting through you. “This is what I mean when I said I can’t always look after you.”

He didn’t need to do this for you. You didn’t need him to.

You didn’t say anything and just watched him as you folded your arms for some warmth. The chill suddenly getting worse.

“Is this- Is that the kind of boys you want to spend your life after?” He looked at you, his eyes judging. Your brows furrowed at his words, at the way he was looking at you. “If you keep on living your life like this, I won’t always be there to protect you.”

“I don’t need you to protect me,” you finally said. “I didn’t ask for your help. I had it under control.”

“You were just standing there, staring at him while he said all that to you!”

“Everyone is entitled to their opinion,” you weren’t the nicest to Yugyeom. You were using him. He wasn't important; his words didn’t affect you, you just hadn’t expected them and didn’t know how to react.

“Those were not opinions, y/n,” Jaebum took a step towards you, his jaw jutting out. He was mad. “He was insulting you, calling you those names. Saying those things to you.”

“It doesn’t matter to me,” you shook your head, as you looked at Jaebum. You didn’t know why he was acting like this.

If anything you should be mad at him.

“Of course it doesn’t,” Jaebum chortled darkly, as he rolled his eyes. “You didn’t like him, you just brought him around for laughs.”

“I did like him.”

A lie.

“Oh really? You did?” He retorted, sarcastic.

“Why not?” You took a step towards him. You hated fighting. “Emma always says to find love so I was giving love a chance.”

“Oh stop that fucking bullshit,” Jaebum groaned, as he rolled his eyes.

“No, you stop,” you told him. You took a step forward and pressed your index finger into his chest. “The only reason this all happened was that you brought up the rating.”

Okay, low blow. You knew that was not the reason, but you needed something to shoot at him with. You can’t just stand there and listen to Jaebum.

And you were mad about this. How could he tell her things you’ve told him. What else has he been telling her?

Did he tell her about that incident where you peed yourself?

“You even fucking told your little girlfriend about it,” it was your turn to scoff up at him. You pressed your finger into his chest making him take a step back. “You fucking told her something I told you in confidence, Jaebum.”

“That wasn’t even that important,” he moaned, defending himself.

You shook your head, feeling your cheeks heat.

“It is important because you told her something I had told you. You are my friend, not her. What else have you told her that I’ve told you?” Jaebum stared down at you, his lips curling into a furious frown.

“Do you go and tell her everything in detail. Tell her all my little secrets. Do you have fun-”

“I have to tell her shit because you fucking act like this.”

“What?”

“I ignore it, but subtlety isn't really your forte, y/n. I see the way you both look at each other. Why would she not feel uncomfortable with me hanging out with you when you act like that?”

“Your precious girlfriend keeps it going too, Jaebum. it's not just me. And what do you mean by act like that? Like what?"

“Like a fucking a brat!”

Fuck off.

A brat? Really.

“Oh, so you can’t hang out with brats? Really? Say what you really mean, Jaebum!”

“You sleep with anyone who blinks at you, y/n. Why would she not be scared?”

You took a step back, hurt.

“Don’t act like a fucking saint, you were fucking anything that walked until a few months ago.”

“I’ve changed.”

“Fuck off you have,” you howled, laughing. You sobered meeting his eyes as you took a step dangerously close to him. “I see the way you look at other girls, Jae.”

You’ve seen the way he looks at you.

“Don’t act like you don’t want to fuck them.”

Don’t act like you don’t want to fuck me.

“I don’t,” he took a step closer to you. Your feet in between his, your nose brushing against his. His forehead resting on yours, his lips so close to yours.

He wasn’t looking at your eyes anymore. His gaze focused on your lips.

His hands gripped your waist, so tight it hurt, as he pressed you against him.

You gulped tilting your head towards him.

“I don’t,” he whispered. He closed his eyes as he blew out a low breath.

“I don’t,” he repeated more to himself.

He let out a sigh as he untangled from you.

“Let’s go in,” Jaebum said, offering you a hand, after a moment.

You didn’t take it. You stared at it, and then at Jaebum.

“We said things we didn’t mean to, let’s go back inside, y/n.”

You looked at his hand. Your chin trembled as you met his eyes again.

Fucking shit don’t cry.

Damn it.

You felt your vision blur.

Damn.

“I didn’t care what that little shit had to say about me. What he says doesn't matter to me, he is no one to me,” Jaebum’s eyes softened, his lips parted as he saw a tear fall down your cheek.

Jaebum had never seen you cry. Only once, and that was it.

“But I care what you say,” you couldn’t continue as you shut your eyes tightly to stop the tears. But they kept coming, and you furiously wiped your chin where you could feel them pool. You turned away from Jaebum as you ordered him, “Go get my coat and purse, and pay for mine and Yugyeom’s share with my card.”

You felt him hesitate, for a second before he walked into the restaurant.

You found a couple of stairs and sat on the third from the bottom.

You continued wiping your tears as you thought of what Jaebum said to you.

After five minutes, Jaebum walked back out and sat next to you.

“Emma’s going to finish her food before leaving,” he told you. You nodded, keeping your eyes down.

Don’t say it.

“Is that why you won’t have sex with me?” You asked, your voice raw and quiet. “Because I drop my panties at anyone who looks my way?”

“No,” Jaebum answered immediately. His voice soft and filled with regret. He turned towards you. You felt him hesitate, but he gently placed his fingers under your chin as he made you turn towards him. “I didn’t mean that.”

“You said it. People say things they think when they’re angry,” your bottom lip trembled, and you saw the panic rise in Jaebum as he took you in.

“I-” he started before sighing. He hugged you, hiding you into his chest and he wrapped his arm around you. “I would never think that about you. It’s just Emma and I have been fighting over this and I don’t know... I guess I heard it so many times it’s just in my head now. But that is not what I think at all.”

“It’s true though,” you replied, muffled.

Jaebum brushed your hair soothingly as he let out a little chuckle. You felt it vibrate through him. It felt good; his warmth, his heartbeat, his smell, the soft hum of his through his chest as he talked. “How can I judge you when I was like that too? I was worse than you. But there’s nothing wrong with having sex with a lot of people. It doesn’t make you any better or worse.”

“Then why not?” You asked, sniffling into his chest.

Jaebum stilled for a second, before replying, “I guess the timing was off.”

“Huh?” You leaned back to look up at him.

Jaebum wiped the tears from your cheeks, chuckling, “You look like a mess when you cry.”

You glared at him and he laughed.

“When we first became friends, I thought you weren’t into casual hookups. You had only had sex with your long-term boyfriend, so I left it. I was having hooking up with so many other girls, I thought it wasn’t right to do that to you. I wasn’t sure if you ever wanted to have sex with me, and you were such a good friend I didn’t want to ruin it. But then, you started hooking up with others.

“And I thought, ‘Oh, I guess she just didn’t want to hook up with me.’ And then the timing went off, and I didn’t want to risk losing you.”

You stayed quiet for a moment, taking it all in.

“You won’t,” you whispered. Jaebum looked at you.

He leaned forward and rubbed his nose against yours. You blew out a breath as rolled your eyes.

“I won’t," he whispered back.

What the fuck does that mean?

“Come on, I’ll take you home,” he got up, offering you a hand. You took it, standing up and grabbing your things off him.

“Not today, Jae,” you tried to give him a smile, but it didn’t quite make it. “I need to cry tonight.”

“I’m sorry about the things I said, y/n,” he took a step towards you, but you moved away. “I won’t tell Emma things anymore, I promise.”

You nodded, walking towards the Main Street with Jaebum following behind you. You waved a hand stopping a taxi; one stopped instantly, and you were pleasantly surprised.

You were about to get in, when you turned around to Jaebum, “Did you tell her about the pee incident?”

Jaebum’s eyes widened, and you shook your head with disappointment.

Fucking shithead, that was a take-to-your-grave secret.

“Never talk to me again,” you told him, getting into the taxi before he could reply.

You trust a boy with your soul, and he shows it to some chick for a bit of personality.

Disgusting.

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jackoshadows · 3 years

Text

So, some speculation on how Bran Stark can become King of Westeros.

The series is called A Song of Ice and Fire and not Game of Thrones as GRRM reminds us - “ And it is important that the individual books refer to the civil wars, but the series title reminds us constantly that the real issue lies in the North beyond the Wall. Stannis becomes one of the few characters fully to understand that, which is why in spite of everything he is a righteous man, and not just a version of Henry VII, Tiberius or Louis XI.”

It is the fight against the Others - this existential apocalyptic threat to ALL mankind - that is more important than petty wars between humans over the Iron Throne. That is the central theme of the books unlike in the show. “When dead men come hunting in the night, do you think it matters who sits on the Iron Throne - Jeor Mormont”.

The Long Night is a horrendous event and Old Nan’s description of it sounds nightmarish.

“Oh, my sweet summer child," Old Nan said quietly, "what do you know of fear? Fear is for the winter, my little lord, when the snows fall a hundred feet deep and the ice wind comes howling out of the north. Fear is for the long night, when the sun hides its face for years at a time, and little children are born and live and die all in darkness while the direwolves grow gaunt and hungry, and the white walkers move through the woods”

The Others … Thousands and thousands of years ago, a winter fell that was cold and hard and endless beyond all memory of man. There came a night that lasted a generation, and kings shivered and died in their castles even as the swineherds in their hovels. Women smothered their children rather than see them starve, and cried, and felt their tears freeze on their cheeks. In that darkness, the Others came for the first time … They were cold things, dead things, that hated iron and fire and the touch of the sun, and every creature with hot blood in its veins. They swept over holdfasts and cities and kingdoms, felled heroes and armies by the score, riding pale dead horses, and leading hosts of the slain. All the swords of men could not stay their advance, and even maidens and suckling babes, found no pity in them. They hunted the maids through the frozen forests, and fed their dead servants on the flesh of human children.

tldr - this shit is scary.

Unlike in the show, the Long Night is not going to last for 10 minutes near Winterfell and solved by Arya jumping from behind a tree and stabbing the Night King. The Long Night will probably be the central story of the last book and cover several months of dark winter and affect the whole of Westeros. In the books, Winter has already come to the North - Snowstorms so bad that even armies in the North are finding it hard to move and Winterfell’s walls are no longer seen. No army is crossing the neck into the North. Winterfell will most likely fall and the fight against the Others will continue down south.

Dany dreams of fighting the Others at the Trident -

“That night she dreamt that she was Rhaegar, riding to the Trident. But she was mounted on a dragon, not a horse. When she saw the Usurper’s rebel host across the river they were armored all in ice, but she bathed them in dragonfire and they melted away like dew and turned the Trident into a torrent. Some small part of her knew that she was dreaming, but another part exulted. This is how it was meant to be. The other was a nightmare, and I have only now awakened.

The last time, the first men were only able to win with the help of the Children and it was the Last Hero - possibly Bran - who gets their help. Bran is the only character in the series heavily involved in this part of the story and he has already met the Children of the forest.

What if the only way the Others can be defeated is some kind of pact where Bran has to become the leader of Westeros for either the Children’s assistance or for the Others to retreat? We really need to know more about the Others and what they want - we probably get this in the next book - to get an inkling of why Bran could be king. We know absolutely nothing about them.

Similarly, the Children hate the Andals, faith of the seven, the lord of the seven kingdoms etc. considering the Andals burned down Weirwoods and destroyed them - what if they want Bran and the Old Gods in the south as a condition for help?

Wouldn’t the whole of Westeros agree to this considering their very survival is what’s at stake? Again, “When dead men come hunting in the night, do you think it matters who sits on the Iron Throne”.

I also very much doubt that the prophecies of Azor Ahai/PTWP are literal - they are about heroes who undertake great sacrifice to save the realm. The key being ‘sacrifice’ - for ex. Nissa Nissa. Giving up something they care about dearly. What if Dany has to give up the Iron Throne for the greater good? Wouldn’t she do it? This could be why Dany and Jon leave Westeros behind - sacrifice - and head for the lands beyond the wall.

Or it could be some kind of conflict between Bran Vs Jon/Dany?

I think Jon, Dany and Bran are the three heads of the dragon, three parts of the prophesied leader and each will play their part in humans winning the Battle for the Dawn. It would be a sacrifice for Bran as well to leave his home and the North for the south.

Will Bran as king undermine GRRM’s entire point about Aragorn and taxes? Yes, it does. Maybe this is where Tyrion comes into the picture. Without Jon and Dany, he’s the next best person to actually rule - and he does this for Bran, as Hand of the King. Maybe Bran is the figurehead and Tyrion the actual ruler - “ When he opened the door, the light from within threw his shadow clear across the yard, and for just a moment Tyrion Lannister stood tall as a king”. - AGoT Jon .

We still have two books left and a lot of story to cover and I think Bran will be getting a lot of POV chapters as GRRM delves more into the fantasy aspect of the series.

So possible character endings: Arya plays an important role being a leader of her people against the Others and ends up being the Stark in Winterfell. Bran ends up as King on the Iron Throne as a condition for either defeating the Others or getting them to retreat, Tyrion ends up Hand of the King/Defacto person actually involved in adminstration and ruling, Jon/Dany leave for beyond the wall and the rest of Westeros assume the Targaryens are dead and gone.

So King Bran is possible - this is high fantasy after all - but how GRRM gets there and whether it makes sense is indeed important and I guess we will have to wait and see if the seeds are getting planted in the next book. According to GRRM’s editor, he told her Bran’s endpoint so they could edit and plan TWoW better:

George is a very secretive fellow, and guards his secrets well. I do know a few things from AWOW, but mainly because we had to shorten a few elements in the book as it was already getting too long, and he had to reveal a few secrets so I could help him redirect parts of the plot a bit. I do know the endpoint of Bran’s story line—and Daniel Abraham, who has been adapting the graphic novel of AGOT for me, knows where Tyrion ends up. - Anne Groel.

#Bran Stark #Tyrion Lannister #Daenerys Targaryen #Jon Snow #Arya Stark #TWoW speculation #ADoS Speculation #Asoiaf

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tolkien-official · 3 years

Text

tom bombadil and beorn were into some of that freaky-deaky-hippie, bear fucker shit i just didn’t put it in the hobbit because according to my editor nobody wants to read smut about a pervert who lives alone in the forest fucking his shapeshifting bear boyfriend, god i wish we had the internet when i was alive

are you writing this down? you should be writing this down

#the hobbit #tolkien

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maxwell-grant · 3 years

Note

Have you read the short story Norvell Page wrote as a wedding present for a Big Name Fan about Dick and Nita's first meeting? Any thoughts on it? My main is that Page does not go where you expect him to based on that description.

I did! Actually it was one of the first Spider stories I read. And yeah, to an extent, it's absolutely not what you'd expect from something set in The Spider's world. And on the other hand, it's absolutely what makes the most sense for these two characters. Because, yeah, Norvell Page could have done what he usually does, and written some over-the-top action where Dick and Nita happen to meet during it.

But no, that wouldn't work. Because, for all the turmoil and chaos in The Spider, for everything that he and Nita go through, there are many times when, sturdier even than Dick's resolve is their love for each other, the deep understanding and affection that carries them through hell itself time and time again.

And so, when it was time to showcase how such a romance started, Page wisely deviated from his usual narrative style, and instead told a very, very intimate and personal story, a long and extended conversation between the two, and more importantly, between Page and the reader. Between The Spider, and You, peering into The Spider through the eyes of Nita van Sloan.

I think for a start, it's an interesting coincidence that this meeting takes place on a cruise ship, and it involves Dick rescuing Nita from suicide. I say this because Margo Lane's first meeting with Lamont Cranston, in the pulps, was stated to have taken place on a cruise ship, and of course, the first time we see The Shadow in the pulps, he's rescuing Harry Vincent from suicide, and both Harry and Margo are The Shadow's main supporting characters. I'm not saying it was intentional, but it's an interesting fact. And more so because Dick doesn't really rescue Nita.

Her scarf whipped in the wind on deck, and it blinded her... and a hand touched her arm, and a voice spoke to her.

"If it's intentional, don't let me stop you," the voice said, "but you're heading straight for suicide."

Nita looked then at the stop toward which, blindly, she was going, and it was a chain barrier beyond which was the sea. And she looked at the man who had stopped her and it was Richard Wentworth. And his words had been a shock to her.

"You wouldn't try to dissuade me from suicide?" she asked.

Wentworth's brows were tilted whit a hint of mockery, but his eyes were very grave. "Every man is master of his own soul, and hence of his body," he said. "And your eyes are wide open and awake. So it would be a considered action. I'm not sure, under those circumstances, that I would have a right to meddle in another's business."

Nita said, "I think you can help me."

Wentworth shook his head. "Only you can help yourself," he said, "but it may be that someone else could help you find the way."

The whole text is a great example of how wonderfully realized of a character Nita van Sloan is in ways so unlike the typical pulp or superhero girlfriends at the time, because the text is written from her perspective, and half of the text reads like an extended character breakdown of who Nita is as a character and person. And the other half of the text is almost entirely comprised of Dick Wentworth spouting philosophy and talking in-depth about his reading of her and what's upsetting her, talking about God and fate and so on. And like so many other attempts to explore serious theological/psychological/philosophical/etc concepts explored through pulp fiction, half of it is bullshit, and half of it is fascinatingly disturbing and thought-provoking bullshit.

"Self-contempt," Wentworth's words were very quiet now. "Is second only to self-pity among the greater sins. Self-analysis is a dangersous thing. You need so much charity. And any person who is advanced enough to think about himself at all is apt to be over-stern in his judgment of himself."

He said to her, "If you don't honor youself, who will honor you?" And, a few moments later, "There is conceit in ruling others, but none in mastering yourself." And, "There is no arrogance so great as self-righteousness."

Nita clashed with him violently, "You are being self-righteous in judging me!"

Wentworth laughed. "I am speaking only truism. It is you who judge yourself, not I." He was serious, then. "My dear," he said, "I would be presumptuous to try to teach you. No man can teach another. But one who has been along that same trail would be less than a man if he failed to mark certain signposts and certain places where there is water to drink so that another, traveling that same road, may know where another struggled and what he has learned. But, as no man can travel a road for another, so no man can teach another. You must work out your own salvation."

"That sense of separation between the inner and outer self," Nita rushed on, "between yourself and the world ... while you were talking, I could almost feel that difference disappearing. The feeling is gone now, but ..."

"All progress is three steps forward and two back," Wentworth said, slowly, "and this is good because thus all ground is three-times covered and triply learned."

And I should probably clarify by this point that, it's not so much Dick Wentworth talking in this story, as it's Norvell Page himself. In fact, he admits as much in another letter he had sent to his readers that he was prone to talking philosophy by this point.

There was a time when the burden of writing just one more Spider seemed too much to undertake. (After all, the magazine is in it's ninth year!) But I never feel that way any more. I know now that the Spider actually does help people; that there are those who appreciate his idealism even though it is expressed in violence.

Especially in the last half dozen Spiders, beginning with the 100th I believe, I have tried very earnestly to teach a little of the philosophy and faith, of which we all need so much in these days.

Here's the thing about The Spider: It's not that the character is mad. Well, okay, he IS mad, I don't pull these over-the-top maniacal cartoon meme descriptions out of thin air, but that's because he lives in a batshit insane disaster horror world where there IS no sane response other than joining the carnage to overcome it. It's not just that Wentworth who is a madman. It's that Norvell Page was a mad man, and Dick Wentworth was Norvell's Page alter-ego, by the man's own admission.

Friends have informed me that I moved about the company as one in a trance: there were some who were concerned about my health, so oddly did I behave. Of course, only my body attended that occasion. My mind was entirely engrossed in Dick Wentworth's big problem - back in my study on a sheet of paper stuck in my typewriter

I did not dream that night; in the morning I restlessly paced my floor thinking, thinking, thinking. I sat down at the typewriter, stared at the words and the keys. Suddenly, as if by magic, Dick Wentworth seemed to move of his own volition. My hands raised, my fingers literally flew over the keyboard.

No matter how ridiculous it seems, I will always feel that Dick Wentworth, creature of my own fabrication, guided me through that tough scene.

No two people can live together without being influenced by each other to some extent. So constantly has Wentworth been in my mind, it is as if we were roommates - partners in everything.

Page has talked about how close of a connection he feels to the character, about many ways he's emulated his mannerisms, even some pretty embarassing anectodes where he claims to have "accidentally" used the character's "indomitable will" to scare waiters or drawing connections between The Spider's cast and real people he's met. Others who met him remarked that he talked of the "Spider" characters as though they were members of his family, or drinking companions.

Even before I got into The Spider, I had heard of rumors that he used to present or discuss stories in his office by putting on a cape and jumping from desk to desk, swinging a yard stick in his hand, and I can't find any source that confirms it, but I don't doubt it in the slightest. A lot of pulp writers had really weird lives, and Page was no exception. He was a journalist who frequently dug into his newspaper clippings for grisly stories to incorporate into narratives. I mean, just look at the dude's eyes, he's seen some shit.

When he was 3, his mother fell down a manhole while they were walking down a Chicago sidewalk. Norvell, terrified, thought she had dissappeared and never quite got over the experience.

When he was a little older, according to some family members, his parents had tickets for the Titanic and escaped disaster when Norvell begged them to cancel the trip for reasons unknown.

Norvell again played a hand in the family's escaping disaster when, one Christmas the family home caught on fire. Candles on the tree had been left burning. He quite arguably saved everyone's life. Waking first, he threw his mattress out of his window, grabbed his infant brother and sister and ran screaming through the hall as he went back to jump to safety. His screams woke his parents who then jumped to the mattress themselves.

Norvell lied about his age and experience to the Norfolk "Observer", claiming to have been writing for Richmond's "Times Dispatch" and was hired there.

His father managed Thomas Edison & Hugo Wurlitzer's ad accounts, and had always encouraged him to write, envisioning him as another Poe, whom his Great-Uncle had worked with as an editor

It is rumored that, in NYC, while at the "World Telegram", he became involved in fellow editor Varion Fry's effort to rescue artists and scientists from occupied Europe. President of the American Fiction Guild, he edited their newsletter for some time. Among his closest friends were fellow writers Ted Tinsley and L. Ron Hubbard and Surrealist painter Max Ernst.

WRITER'S REVIEW 35.08: Norvell W. Page, whose bloodthirsty Spider novels would do justice to Ghengis Khan, demonstrated his bloodlust the other day by accidentally killing a sparrow.

He wrote until 1943, when he abruptly stopped without warning. He dissappeared, for all intents and purposes, from both New York, the arts world and the pulp world for good.

His wife of 20 years, Audrey, had died and this, along with the U.S. involvment in WWII, led to his returning to VA where he would go on to be an intelligence worker in the Truman, Kennedy and Eisenhower Administrations.

He died suddenly of a heart attack in August of 1961.

Surviving family members do not know where he is buried.

I think this is a story that Page might have told differently had he written it earlier in his career, before he got tired, before he underwent his depression and loss of weight that caused him to briefly stop writing pulps all together, in a time period before the World War had cast an oppressive miasma on the world. In a time period where most of the horrifying nightmares he infused into the stories were really just that, nightmares, that he didn't live long enough to see turn into prophecies.

Because that's another thing about The Spider that makes the character more than just a batshit vigilante: As over-the-top as the stories were, a lot of them also inevitably turned out to predict some form of catastrophe in real life.

Written with an eye to the horrors festering in Germany at the time, The Mayor of Hell now reads as an infernal vision of the Homeland Security Act.

The poisoned products found in The Red Death Rain and The Pain Emperor call to mind the Tylenol killings of the summer of 1982, and the hundreds of poisoned products cases that followed.

Bio-terrorism plays large in the Spider mythos, with bubonic plague in Wings of the Black Death, rabies in The Mad Horde, and cholera in The Cholera King foreshadowing the Anthrax scare of 2001. The same could be said of the terror gases from Kingdom of Doom and Green Globes of Death and the nerve gas attack in the Tokyo subways in March of 1995.

Masters of the Death Madness unfolds as a nightmare meditation upon suicide, which has become one of the principal weapons of modern terrorists. One scene involves suicide bombers.

Another scene chillingly presages the Jonestown massacre of 1978: a grand procession lines up to drink from a bowl of poisoned wine while surrounding gunmen pick off anyone who refuses to drink.

The modern reader will recognize the psychological and sociological effects of a citizenry living under the threat of terrorism, so chillingly evoked by Page: the grating loss of safety, the imminent threats lurking in familiar objects, the way security can no longer be taken for granted, the kind of skittishness that empties a building at the first sign of an unknown white powder.

The eeriest of all the modern terrorist parallels appears in a novel called The City Destroyer, originally published in 1936. It features a set piece involving the collapse of a fictitious gigantic building, supposedly the tallest in New York City, called “The Sky Building.” When it fell, it wiped out five city blocks and claimed 1,000 lives. And perhaps it’s worth noting a further parallel that occurred in the 1970’s, when Pocket Books tried to revive the Spider; they repackaged him in a paperback series, striving for an image of what was then cool and thrusting Richard Wentworth into a contemporary setting.

When Pocket Books reprinted and updated The City Destroyer in 1975, the collapse of the Sky Building was replaced with the collapse of the World Trade Center - Stuart Hopen's essay on The Spider

Regardless of how much reality Page was infusing into his stories (because, again, he took a lot of his material from newspapers) or how much he foresaw intentionally or not, writing The Spider definitely took it's toll on him, and as the magazine neared it's final stretch with him on the helm, certain parts did began taking a more philosophical or religious tone, as more of Page's own beliefs, more of Page's attempts to use it as a vehicle to do good, began to bleed through the page.

And ultimately I think that's also what the story of Dick and Nita's first meeting is about, sort of an extended analysis not just of Nita, who Page himself said was a character he conceived as "the epitome of womanhood" and everything he thought admirable about it, but also of Wentworth's own character, and the things Page wanted to get through in his time.

Religion crept deeper into the series with each succeeding year. By all accounts, Norvell Page was a man of deep faith and spirituality who just happened to be writing the exploits of a hero whose idea of mercy was a bullet in the brain instead of the stomach.

In the 100th novel, Death and The Spider, Wentworth battles Death itself - or so it seems - and on Christmas Eve, he is shot so badly while protecting the President from assassination that everyone believes he's dead - including himself.

Dead or not, he forces himself to fight on, sustained only by reciting the 23rd Psalm over and over again.

Nita laughed and accepted a cigarette. "I don't know how to thank you."

"Don't," Wentworth's voice was sharp. "I told you I am only a channel. Don't confuse me with the Source."

It stopped words on Nita's lips, and it gave here a new respect and a new and sudden attitude toward this man beside her, this man who could laugh and jest with everyone about him, and who could teach like a very oracle ... and who carried about him such a sense of dedication to high purpose. He might seem apart from the world, but he was utterly and completely of it.

Nita said, half-laughing, half-serious, "May I like you? And may I admire your ... adjustment?"

"Don't envy my adjustment," he grinned at her. "Have one yourself." He snapped flame to her cigarette with his lighter, and his lean, strong hand was steady and sure as his eyes, as his voice. He was speaking to her but he was looking at the lighter. "I have found my mission," he said quietly.

#pulp heroes #the spider #nita van sloan #pulp fiction #norvell page #it's pretty much impossible to talk about the spider without sounding like a pulp writer yourself

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a-singleboat · 4 years

Text

Virtual Reality

Word Count: 2.4k

Request: hi! if your taking requests, i was wondering if you could write a damien x reader, where they meet through Twitch? add anything else you want i always love everything you write, thanks so much!! - anon

Warning(s): like, one swear

It was a Thursday night when you first met him, or rather, heard of him. You had been streaming for five hours heading into your sixth when you decided it might be time for you to log off for the night. As per usual, you took at least thirty minutes at the end of your stream just to talk with your viewers, usually about how their lives were going in exchange for a story from your own day.

Tonight, however, there was an influx of people asking if you’d ever heard of a streamer by the name of Damien Haas, which you hadn’t, and if you would do a collaboration with the man anytime soon. Apparently, your content was eerily similar and you were, and I quote, “Practically the female version of him, looks aside.”

“Damien Haas…” you rolled yourself back closer to your desk, hands settled on your keyboard. You typed his name into the search bar, patiently waiting for Twitch to pull up his account. You clicked into the first one, making an impressed face at the purple checkmark next to his name. You squinted at the screen. “Is this him? In the profile picture with the LEDs in the background?”

You glanced at your chat, chuckling as the viewers started spamming ‘yes’ and ‘oh my god it’s happening,’ and your personal favorite, ‘mom come pick me up the best crossover of 2020 is happening and im SCARED.’

“He plays a lot of Animal Crossing,” you observed, clicking on one of his videos and dragging the tab onto your main monitor so the stream could see it. You skipped through the beginning part, biting into a pretzel as you watched.

“He’s kinda cute,” you commented, laughing as your stream freaked out once more. There were a few people commenting what looked like it could be a ship name though you ignored it. “Shame I’d never meet him, though.”

You paused his video, taking note of the time, before rolling out your shoulders. “I think it’s time for me to head out so I’m gonna end this stream with a huge thank you to you all for sticking with me through this entire stream and if you didn’t stay the entire time, I’m glad you decided to join in on the ride even halfway through. I’ll see you guys next time.”

You ended the stream, waving goodbye to your viewers before the light went out and you could relax the smile off your face. Don’t get it twisted, you loved streaming and you loved your viewers but just like any other job, it could get exhausting at times. You shut down your monitors, the screens turning blue before fading to black. You stretched, taking your phone up from its charger and launching yourself into bed, opening your phone and clicking on Twitter.

Much like staying thirty minutes after you were done streaming to talk to viewers, you usually went on Twitter right after to answer questions and respond to DMs. This time, however, instead of opening the app to see a bunch of post-stream questions, your mentions were filled with the video clip of you saying, “He’s kinda cute,” as well as maybe a million people tagging both you and Damien in them.

Well, shit.

Soon enough, that was all that filled your timeline. You couldn’t move in one direction without running into another screencap of you admiring the man. God, you knew the consequences but something in the back of your mind was urging you to reach out to him.

After a few moments of contemplation, the lonely side of you won out, forcing you to message him against your better judgment. Without even thinking about it, you found his Twitter and sent this message:

Hey, I’m sorry about your mentions blowing up because of me tonight. My viewers recommended your Twitch to me and I spoke without thinking about it on Live.

And with no expectation of his response, you fell asleep right there with your phone on your chest and the DM still open.

You woke up the next morning with a sore neck and a dead phone, which was a terrible way to start your day. You rolled over, plugging your device into an outlet before crawling out of bed to start your day. When you weren’t streaming, you worked as a freelance editor for different YouTubers, helping their editors with their workload or even staying on as a Temp for different companies. Occasionally you edited the odd commercial here and there, but those gigs were rare.

Most recently, you had received some material from a group of YouTubers, Smosh. This job was different, however, because if you did well on this you could be looking at a permanent place of employment through their parent company, Mythical Entertainment.

You knew Mythical Entertainment, it was hard not to, especially since your aunt was one of the producers within the company, but tended to ignore everything the company did. The last you’d heard, they’d onboarded another YouTube group (which you did later find out to be Smosh, the same YouTubers whose video you were hired to edit).

After a quick shower and a half-assed attempt at a proper breakfast, you were ready to start your day. You situated yourself behind your monitors, opening the video clips that had been sent to you. The first was a sample video, something that gave you insight on what their editing style was actually like.

But imagine your surprise when you’re staring down the same man you have called cute the night before, his approximately five-eleven stance taking up one-sixth of the space. He was standing next to a blond, who had been marked as “Shayne Topp.”

Despite there being five other people in frame, your eyes kept moving back to Damien’s figure, watching his mannerisms through the screen and laughing along to his jokes when they fell upon deaf ears.

Your eyes slid over to your phone, now decently charged after sitting for so long. On your screen were dozens of notifications. There were maybe two from your mom, asking if you’d be coming home for dinner sometime that week but the majority came from Twitter. You picked up the device, unlocking and responding to your mom with a, “yes,” before opening Twitter.

Nothing much had changed from the night prior. Your mentions were still being flooded with the video from last night but newer content had been ushered in, namely fan edits using footage from your streams and, you assumed, his.

The only major difference, however, was the fact that Damien had responded to your DM from the night prior. The first message read:

It’s really no problem! My stream had mentioned your name before, too.

Followed by the second:

P.S. I think you’re cute, too.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. Mr. Damien Haas, the man that you had made a thoughtless comment on stream about, also thought that you were cute. Suddenly, the fact that you had been staring at him for the past hour seemed less stalkerish and more like a blooming crush. You wrote back:

Aw, thanks! Have you seen the newer fan edits? They’re all so talented.

You cringed at yourself. A cute boy started talking to you and you’ve suddenly forgotten how to be suave, not that you really were in the first place. But still, you liked to think you had some tact when talking to people that you found attractive.

Not even a moment later, there came a response.

Yes, I have, he responded. And I agree! They are all very talented individuals.

You looked from the monitor in front of you. You had about a quarter of the footage left to go through before you could start editing but this technically wasn’t due until the following night. Feeling emboldened by the fact that he had actually responded, you replied:

Are you going to TwitchCon on Friday? We should meet up or something.

Anxiously you awaited his response, taking his silence as an opportunity to watch a bit more of the footage and take down notes according to the sample they’d given you. Roughly thirty minutes later is when the next response came in, reading as an affirmative to both questions.

You didn’t respond, choosing to leave your social media for after you’d finished editing the video. Your heart still pounded, however. Just the thought that there was a possibility for the two of you to meet was, simply put, insane. You’d just heard of the guy the night before and decided that he was going to be your latest hyperfixation.

But who could blame you? He was a nice, funny guy that showed the slightest bit of attraction towards you. It didn’t help that you were a sucker for guys that were nice to you.

Fast forward to the Friday of TwitchCon, also known as the first day of TwitchCon. You and Damien had been talking steadily over Twitter DMs and just last night you had gained his phone number, giving you even more access to the man than you had before. But of course, who were you if you didn’t tease your fans with the prospect of you meeting.

The night before, at the end of your stream, you’d given your fans the little tidbit of information that you and Damien were, in fact, planning on meeting up sometime during TwitchCon and would be greeting fans together for an hour at your booth.

That sent Twitter into a frenzy, both of your combined fans getting your ship name to trend within the hour, which confused the hell out of a bunch of locals.

It was nearing the time you and Damien had set to meet up. The plan was you’d meet around twelve for lunch, take an hour for yourselves, before going back to your booth and meeting with fans for an hour or so as promised.

You had never been more nervous than you were in that moment. Not only were you about to meet your three-day-old crush but apparently a very popular YouTuber. You tried not to let the thought mess with your head. One of your friends, Wilbur Soot (who you played Minecraft with from time to time) was poking fun at you for being nervous about meeting a popular YouTuber.

After three years of streaming and gaining a solid following, you’d think you’d be used to meeting other popular content creators. But because it was him, you found yourself unable to think straight.

“What if I fuck up?” you asked Wilbur anxiously. He’d flown in from London for this event at your insistence and because you’d offered to pay half his airfare to get there and back. He didn’t have his own booth as his arrival was very last minute, but he didn’t mind. He signed the occasional poster though his main purpose was to provide you mental and emotional support.

“You won’t fuck up,” he comforted, leafing through one of the comics a fan had given you. The entire thing was hand-drawn, which was an insane fact in itself. It looked professional, which was what blew you away when you’d received it. “Well, you won’t fuck up as badly as you did when you first met Schlatt.”

You groaned in embarrassment. “Don’t remind me.”

Long story short, you’d dumped a red in color slushy on the man accidentally after tripping over an unmarked cable. It really wasn’t your fault but the boys hadn’t let you live it down since then.

Half a moment later, Wilbur was poking your side. “Is that him?” he asked, jabbing his pointer finger into your side while looking in the opposite direction. He was looking at a familiar figure walking down the hallway toward your booth. He stopped for a moment to take a photo with a fan, talking to them about something, before continuing on his way toward you.

Your eyes locked and you gave him a smile while trying to beat Wilbur into no longer poking you. He stopped when you slapped his arm the first time, sticking his tongue at you before going on his phone. You rolled your eyes at his half-assed attempt of pretending he wasn’t about to start listening in on your conversation.

“Hey, Y/n, right?” Damien asked as he approached. You nodded, reaching out for a handshake but becoming pleasantly surprised when he instead pulled you in for a hug.

“You ready for lunch?” you asked glaring slightly at Wilbur as he made kissy faces over Damien’s shoulder. Luckily, Damien hadn’t noticed your moron of a best friend.

“Yeah, I saw this sushi place on the way in if you wanted to try that?”

“I’d be down,” you agreed, reaching behind your table to grab your bag. Wilbur was set to meet with a few other Minecraft streamers, meaning you didn’t have to worry about him while you had lunch. You looked over your shoulder, making sure everything was set for you to leave before saying goodbye to Wilbur.

Over the course of lunch, you and Damien had gotten to know each other pretty well. Once the conversation moved away from your fans and, well, work, and more into personal details, you found that you actually weren’t all that similar. For starters, Damien loved watching anime while your guilty pleasure was Gilmore Girls. The one show you both had a love for, however, was Avatar the Last Airbender, which made sense.

Another thing was that he actually enjoyed being in front of the camera while you tolerated it on most days, really only putting on your face cam for the last thirty minutes on most days. Despite that, he still classified himself as an introvert.

You returned back to your booth much later than you anticipated, thoroughly shocked at the line that had formed with Wilbur at the front of it, entertaining the fans that had shown up early to meet both you and Damien.

“Y/n!” one fan called, pointing in your direction. Immediately, the entire line turned and gaped at the sight of you and Damien walking together. You greeted them happily, stopping for pictures and verbally promising that you’d stay until you got to meet everyone personally.

“You really love your fans,” Damien observed as you put your things back down behind the table. Wilbur had set up shop on your right side, chatting with a few people at the front of the line.

“I wouldn’t be anywhere without them,” you admitted, pulling a silver sharpie from your bag. You handed a gold one to Damien. “I also wouldn’t have gotten to meet you without them, which I’m still sorry about, by the way. Your feed must have been chaotic.”

“You have no idea,” he chuckled. “But everything happens for a reason.”

You nodded, grinning up at him. “Yes, they do.”

Permanent

@beautiful-holland @toms-order @starlightfound @grandmascottlang @positiveparker @bippity-boppity-boopa @caswinchester2000 @andreasworlsboring101 @imladylunaticbitch

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fae-fucker · 3 years

Text

Zenith: Chapter 72-75

Chapter 72

We’re in Nor’s POV. She’s moping around in her ruined palace. We find out she ordered the attack on Adhira on a whim after learning Valen was there. Cool.

This entire chapter is about how Nor is doubting herself and how she feels shitty even though this should be a triumph, and Zahn, her boytoy who’s literally described as being “too good” and “too pure” for her, telling that she’s a girlboss. Then they make out and “lust tumbles through her” and the chapter ends on them fucking.

Chapter 73

Last we left her, Andi had angsted herself out of the room after an argument with her dad. She walks the gardens for a bit, thinking about the creation myth of this world. It involves Light Bringers and Night Spirits, and two of them fall in love and from their union a black hole is born, but around it a galaxy forms, and it also creates the Godstars, which are described as “all-knowing beings with the power to give and take, the perfect mixture of darkness and light.”

So with all this wank about light and dark, you bet your ass Andi’s gonna start rambling about how dark and/or light her soul is, which she promptly does.

The creation myth is ... fine? In theory? But something light and something dark falling in love and creating the world is a bit trite, innit? Baby’s first creation myth.

Arcardius was the first planet inhabited by the Ancients hundreds of thousands of years ago, and many believed that the Godstars must have given the settlers this gift to welcome them to their new home. But whatever the reason, Andi was grateful for it. She didn’t want to be in the presence of darkness after everything that had happened. She needed to clear her mind of all that had been clogging it since the beginning of the rescue job.

I think “clogging” is a more apt description than Shinsay realized.

Andi angsts herself to a new place with a floating rock waterfall fountain thing, where Valen is, equipped with his painting gear. We get a description of how hot he is despite having been beaten and starved for two years, because of course.

His brown hair was cropped short and, skinny as he was, it made his strong jaw more pronounced. Everything about his once-soft face was now hard edges. No doubt, with some more meat on his bones, he would be striking.

The boy she remembered from years ago had now become a man.

Damaged as he must be on the inside, at least his physical wounds would heal. The awful things he had experienced at the hands of Xen Ptera would hopefully become a distant memory, as well, and more bearable with time.

The way the “hope he’ll heal emotionally as well, I guess” is tacked on right after “at least he’ll be hot” is wildly hilarious.

Valen asks if he can paint Andi. For some reason he immediately starts putting paint on canvas, because fuck sketching, he’s too fucking good for that. Also what’s the lighting situation like? He’s waxing poetic about the way the light hits Andi’s cheek plates and purple streaks (with red tips that reaches her mid-back), but seemingly doesn’t need any light on his canvas to see what the fuck he’s doing, in the middle of the night? Ok.

Later Valen, with a paint-stained face because Artiste, asks Andi if they can go somewhere else because he needs a break. They go somewhere with a view of the Magical Purple Pinterest Garden, and it’s very breathtaking and shit.

“We’ve been through darkness, Andi,” Valen said. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t still live in the light.”

He closed his eyes, and Andi was left to ponder how much his words echoed her own thoughts from earlier, about the balance between the light and the dark.

Thank you for pointing out the thematic connection from THREE PAGES AGO IN THE SAME CHAPTER, Shinsay. I couldn’t have figured it out myself if you hadn’t held my hand like the imbecile I am. Seriously, I can’t figure out whether this is supposed to be helpful, or if Shinsay really thought they were geniuses and just had to point it out so we wouldn’t miss how cool and deep their writing is.

Anyway, Valen asks Andi to the obligatory ball portion of the story, saying he’ll have to dance as the future ruler of the planet (???) and he wants to dance with a friend rather than a romantic interest.

A friend.

He said the word as if he really meant it. As if, somehow, despite what they’d been through, the horrors they’d shared, Valen had begun to think of Andi as a friend.

Wow ... When he said friend, he meant friend, as in friend? Amazing. What a shocker.

Also, yeah, they did go through some horrors together. Like that time Dex tossed him down a flight of stairs while Andi was somewhere else. Or that time Valen was tortured for two years and Andi wasn’t.

Truly, a friendship of the ages.

I guess this is supposed to be a misdirect, but given how blatantly unrealistic this is and how easily Andi falls for it, it just makes her look a bit like an idiot, doesn’t it?

Chapter 74

This chapter is just Andi heading back to bed but taking a detour to the library, discovering that Alfie has been destroyed while some servants throw his body in the garbage on the way.

Oh no! Not Alfie, who’s only the most annoying character! Anyone but Alfie!

We get this:

As she turned to leave, a small, shiny object on the floor caught her eye. Quickly, Andi reached down and palmed it while the maid wasn’t looking. She didn’t know much about AIs, but the object in her grasp looked like a memory chip.

[...]

It could be nothing, a useless memento, but her gut told her something different. She’d look into it later.

I-is this supposed to be foreshadowing? You literally already told us what it was, why would Andi’s “gut” be telling her something she already suspects according to her narration?

Henlo? Editors? Anyone? Hello?

Hewwo? Mistew Pwesident?

Chapter 75

Dex has been following Andi around like a whole creep and watches her enter the library. He follows her inside and then we get the obligatory “shitty writer praises the magic of literature” bit.

“The general scoured the galaxy for this collection,” Andi said suddenly.

Dex turned. She stood near him in the dark room, softly lit by a beam of moonlight. The sadness in her eyes could almost be felt, like a tangible thing.

“You said Kalee was a reader,” Dex said. He laughed softly. “I didn’t know she was this much of a reader.”

“She loved exploring,” Andi said. “The general loved keeping her close. And so she turned to books for her adventures.”

“The sadness in her eyes was almost tangible.” There, I fixed it. Now shut the fuck up.

“What is it about memories,” Andi said suddenly, walking back toward him, “that gives them the ability to hurt us so badly?”

Dex shook his head. “The past is powerful. I think you and I both know that.”

She finally looked into his eyes. “I’m tired of letting the past control me, Dextro,” she whispered. “Aren’t you?”

I’m tired of letting this book control me, that’s for sure. What is this fucking dialogue? They keep talking in clichés without really saying anything, wasting our goddamn time instead of having an actual conversation.

Anyway, they finally get everything over with, apologize to each other, then make out but decide that uwu they can’t be together because they’re so hurt and damaged and whatnot. And honestly this wouldn’t be so cringeworthy if we didn’t know it’s all just a fucking ploy to drag out the will-they-won’t they subplot that I’m sure you’re all on the edge of your seats over.

The main reason this doesn’t work is that we don’t really get any sense of why this can’t work out? They just mutually agree, after having a hot makeout sesh, that they’re not meant to be for ... reasons? Even though they’re clearly attracted to each other, have no other attachments, romantic or otherwise, and have forgiven one another. Dex thinks they both “ruined” their future together in their own ways, but we don’t get any explanation for why they can’t just ... try to build a new one. Not even a “the memories hurt too much” or “I can’t afford the mental and emotional effort right now” or “there’s no time for it with the galaxy in chaos” or even a simple “I don’t want to.”

Instead it’s “I know we’re not meant to be because we both screwed the pooch last time we tried” and you’re just there like yes and? What’s stopping you from trying again? Give me a reason. IRL that would’ve been fine, but here it just feels like the authors are trying to convince US that they won’t get together, trust me, I promise, don’t even think about it and let it blow you away when they do.

I think, weirdly enough, the reason this doesn’t work for me is the perspective. Andi has actual valid reasons for rejecting Dex and seems like she’s still conflicted about her feelings for him, which would give her plenty of justification to not jump back into the relationship. But instead, we’re stuck with Dex, who’s been desperate to talk to Andi, be around Andi, who thinks about Andi constantly, but now, when a new beginning is within his reach, he decides without reason to not go for it because what, he feels like it’s not right and assumes it’s mutual? It doesn’t track with his previous behavior, which has been constantly focused on Andi up until this point. His sudden and inexplicable decision to not pursue this anymore goes against his behavior and motivations so far, which is why it strikes me as hollow and manipulative writing.

Had he maybe wanted to offer a new start but then Andi said something or he saw how unsure and hurt she still was and decided against it, then it would’ve made sense. Had we been in Andi’s POV and she just straight up rejected him, it would’ve made sense. But here, we get:

“We can’t... This won’t ever...”

“I know,” he said.

And in his heart, he knew that it was true. Their two worlds were never meant to become one. That even through the forgiveness, even with the unavoidable feelings that echoed between them, they could never share a future. They had already had their chance, long ago. They’d both ruined it in their own ways.

Andi doesn’t even give him a proper reason, he just assumes what she’s saying because apparently he’s been thinking the same thing? His “heart” just tells him it won’t work, when all this time, he’s seemingly done everything in his power to fix what he always knew wasn’t fixable? Huh???

I’m not saying this to say that Dex should’ve pestered Andi, he can very well accept her rejection but still pine for her silently. What I am saying is that this doesn’t track with his previous behavior, and just shows the authors’ hands in this as being a cop-out for the sake of melodrama and to keep the romance subplot going through cheap conflict.

Anyway, Dex asks Andi to the ball and she’s like “lmao too late” and then the chapter ends on this note:

When they parted ways, Dex couldn’t help but feel as if he were seeing Androma Racella for the very last time.

God, I wish that were me.

#eff reads: zenith

6 notes · View notes

peeterparkr · 4 years

Text

limits of desire⤳t.h.||epilogue

Epilogue: Wallking down an aisle.

story summary: you met Tom a night he was trying to sleep with you, it didn’t work and you became best of friends. Wedding bells might be ringing for when you both realize what you really feel.

summary: the one with the wedding and the magazine article

pairing: fuckboy!tom holland x best friend!reader

warnings: hmm an article, swearing, julia roberts, fluff :)

word count: 5.K

previous chapter series masterlist Here’s my new story! Perfidy (enemies to lovers) a one shot after this: Tom’s proposal

Anyway, thanks for sticking up to this story, for giving it a chance and for the support. I’m super sad it’s ending but I’m glad you guys stuck asdlas love you.

Your wedding day, according to movies and books, is the best day of your life. The bride is blushing and glowing and everything goes perfect. But, that is usually not the case, not in real life, at least. Because you’ll see shoes flying and people screaming and running around a room. People rushing in with the bride and calling the groom.

Lizzie was staring at the clock in her phone, she was calling everyone, y/n was nowhere to be found and she needed her friend. There were a lot of things to do, and y/n had promised to be there at 7 am sharp.

It was a good thing Lizzie had not made a mistake in choosing Mexico as the location, knowing it meant a lot of drama involved with y/n, but there could’ve been a reason behind it. Where things had ended for y/n happened to be the place where it had started for Lizzie.

Lizzie was, in all matters, freaking out. Her mother and sisters were overwhelming her with questions and picking her hair and running around her room. But none of them mattered, she needed her very best friend. But she thought that maybe y/n wasn’t feeling her best. Lizzie thought about this, was y/n having a breakdown over this?

She thought that maybe y/n wasn’t exactly fine with weddings. Sure, she’d been writing about this for a while now, but it wasn’t the same writing about it than living on it.

But this was Lizzie’s big day, she couldn’t possibly be bothered by it, should she? But she wanted her best friend to be along with her.

Lizzie was getting married.

It was 8 am, where the hell was she? That’s all Lizzie could think about. And she wasn’t the only one who was late, Hannah and Jess were late too. Great friends Lizzie had.

But Lizzie, she hadn’t told anyone, was having second thoughts. She was too nervous for this. Because the stylist wasn’t there yet, her bridesmaids’ dresses had arrived in a different colour, red, not pink. Red. And because the venue had called her wedding planner and told her there had been an issue with the salmon and now they were serving chicken.

Everything was going bollocks.

Lizzie was having an attack, but it seemed like her prayers had come true because Hannah and Jess had walked in, with their dresses in their hands and makeup bags.

“I’m sorry we’re late!” Hannah said. “Y/N’s new article was published!” Hannah waved the magazine in her hand.

Lizzie blinked and frowned. “What?”

Jess nudged Hannah. “Sorry, no, that’s not why we’re late. We went to pick up the dresses”

Hannah widened her eyes and left the magazine on the bed.

“Where the hell is y/n?” Asked Lizzie. “I can’t seem to reach her, it sends me to fucking voicemail!”

Jess and Hannah side-eyed each other.

“Didn’t you see her insta story?” Hannah asked and Jess nudged her again.

“What? No! I’ve been kinda busy! Where the hell is she?” Asked Lizzie. “Gosh I need her, she’ll be able to calm me down! Did she… Did she run away? Some shit like that?”

“No! No, but last night-” Hannah started

“Shut up!” Jess glared at Hannah. “She’ll be here, don’t worry,” Jess assured her. “She went to look for another stylist because we were told Jamie hadn’t arrived yet.”

Lizzie stood up. “Alright.” They all watched her. “Alright.” Lizzie took a deep breath. “I can’t do this.”

“What?” Lizzie’s mother questioned.

“Call Harrison, I can’t do this.”

“No, no,” Hannah walked over as Lizzie’s sisters were also trying to calm her down.

“It’s okay, Lizzie, you’re just stressed out, it’ll be okay,” Jess started.

“Everyone, please just leave, I need a moment to myself,” Lizzie explained.

“C’mon, Liz!” Hannah insisted.

The wedding planner stepped in. “No, no, she’s right, give her some time, everyone out,” she ordered and the room that was once full of bustle was now too quiet.

Lizzie plopped on her bed, and snuggled into her white rob and then stared at the dress. Was she able to do this?

She felt butterflies and knives at the same time. She was unsafe. She needed to talk to y/n, who had been there all along. Y/N had been the perfect maid of honour, even if Lizzie had initially been reluctant after complaining about Y/N choosing Tom over her on her first wedding.

Lizzie knew hadn’t really talked about how it felt to be about to get married, partly, Lizzie knew, it had to do a little bit with the fact that y/n wanted to marry her maid of honour instead. It came with the territory.

But Lizzie was having second thoughts because she did want to get married but it seemed like the universe was telling her not to. The salmon? The stylist? It had to mean something. Because she had planned this wedding perfectly. If there was something going wrong, it meant her marriage was going to go wrong, right?

She tried ringing her friend again and it sent straight to voicemail. She went on Instagram to see if Y/N’s story could solve anything. There was no new Instagram story, not for her close friends, and no new one. Had y/n blocked her? Was y/n having a crisis due to the wedding?

Maybe asking y/n to be her maid of honour hadn’t been the best idea, after all y/n used to call herself the runaway bride and Lizzie was sure that Y/N probably didn’t want to do anything else with weddings. Even if she wrote a wedding column in a magazine.

She knew that today was supposedly a very important day for y/n’s column on the magazine, apparently, y/n was now going to be promoted as to one of the usuals and not only a dumb column. An editor, maybe? Lizzie didn’t know, her head had been too busy planning a wedding that she hadn’t really paid attention to her best friend.

She stared at the magazine that Hannah had left there, lying on top of the white blanket. Lizzie frowned, did she have to read her best friend’s column?

She sighed, she did. It was the closest thing to having her best friend beside her. She opened the magazine to a beautiful shot of her best friend wearing a wedding dress with running shoes, surrounded by some DVDs and cassettes of old Julia Roberts’ movies.

The Runaway Bride, the title was in a big, elegant pink font. It wasn’t like her usual columns, small and with barely a page of it. This was a long article. Lizzie smiled, proud of y/n and then proceeded to read it.

Tom knew that Haz himself had had his doubts too if he was honest to himself. Harrison was freaking out and he knew that there was a big chance that Lizzie had wanted to back up. Tom had been the one to calm him down.

“It’s gonna be okay!”

“What do you know?” Haz had snapped. “First, thanks for being bloody late. Why were you late?”

Tom cleared his throat. “There was a problem with your bride’s stylist and I helped y/n to find a new one.”

“Because they have to do everything together now, remember?” Sam teased, making Tuwaine and Harry giggle.

“Shut up,” Tom blushed but then coughed away his embarrassment.

“And why did you leave early yesterday?” Haz questioned.

Tuwaine and the twins widened their eyes, Tom hadn’t told him yet.

“Uh, I had… a stomach ache,” Tom lied. “No, but Haz, calm down. It’s gonna turn out smoothly.”

“You’re one to talk! You ruined one wedding man, what if some ex of her decides to fucking show up and bloody tell her he loves her?”

“In that case,” Harry laughed. “Y/N would walk in and ruin the wedding, she’s the maid of honour.”

“You’re not helping, dickhead,” Tom told his brother off. “Haz, look, you have to calm down, everything will be alright. This is great, she loves you, alright? And I barely doubt anyone would come back for Lizzie, no, no no, I’m joking, I’m joking.”

Harrison rolled his eyes.

“Look, that stuff doesn’t usually happen, that one time happened because the bride was marrying someone who she didn’t love, and Lizzie loves you, right?” Tom pushed.

“Right, right, but fuck, I’m so bloody nervous!” Haz had his tie around his neck and he was trying to get it right.

“Calm down, dumbass,” Tom laughed as he helped Harrison with his tie. “Everything will be alright.”

“Yeah man, it’ll be okay.”

“I mean, you are marrying Lizzie, not sure how that’s gonna go but,” Tom teased, earning Haz’s middle finger. “I’m joking,” he laughed. “C’mon, c’mon.”

“Dude, everything has gone wrong,” Haz explained. “Something about the salmon and the dresses! And gosh, we’ve been planning this wedding for months and things are tearing up.”

Tom bit his lip. “Okay, I know, I know… I make everything about y/n but.”

“Oh god, don’t start,” Harry rolled his eyes.

“Look,” Tom ran to his bag and took out a magazine. “Maybe… read this, maybe it’ll help you.”

“How in the bloody hell is reading a fashion magazine going to help me?” Haz questioned.

“Read it.”

And so the bride and the groom were synchronized, reading a fashion magazine.

The Runaway Bride.

By Y/N Y/L/N

I guess by now, you’ve been reading me for a while, and the world, I hope, has forgotten who I initially was. Maybe you know me as the girl who’s been giving you advice on wedding dresses, on venues and on cakes.

That’s not who I was before all of this. Maybe you knew about my name before I started writing that column here.

After the world took a turn on me, I decided to instead turn it around for me. Maybe the person who was meant to read this will actually read this and clear her doubts, I know you have them. Maybe you’ll smile. Maybe you won’t. Maybe this is my way of clearing your doubts, after all, I am your friend.

There’s not much I can say about me, my name is Y/N, I am an invisible journalist who initially wanted to talk about everyone and everything else and now I’m here writing about myself. I can’t say much about me, I guess. I like my tea with lemon and honey, and I also like it with sugar and cream. Depends on my mood, but I usually prefer iced coffee or a pink mimosa. I love poetry, and I wish I could share a dessert with someone right now,

I am a girl with layers. I do have a story, though.

When I was young I remembered watching all Julia Roberts movies and aspiring to be like her. Don’t tell my mum, but I watched Pretty Woman at a very young age, even if I didn’t quite understand it if I’m honest. But I remember standing up and digging into my mum’s closet to wear some heels, a white coat and a hat to walk down her room to the beat of that infamous song, after that amazing scene.

“Big Mistake, Huge!” I would yell at the same time as Julia. It was a Cinderella for grown-ups type of story. I didn’t quite understand what Vivian's job was, but I understood that she had to kiss Richard Gere and I was fine with that.

I want that to be my job if I’m honest. Can you blame me?

Anyone who knows me, knows I love all Julia Roberts’ movies. Little would I know how much like Julia Roberts’ films my life would turn out to be?

I would like to pride myself on that I’ll become a successful writer like she was on Eat, pray, love.

However, my dream didn’t quite exactly come as I had planned it. Be careful of what you wish, I guess. So far I haven’t found myself moving to Italy to understand the power and pleasure of nourishment, neither have I gone to India to pray and so far I haven’t gone to Indonesia to find my true love.

I did go to Mexico however, and found pleasure in their food. I have gone to my mother’s house and she’s made me pray, and I’ve been to London, and honestly I think this city is truly the love of my life.

Maybe I’m lying. I have met true love, but I guess it’s not the time to talk about it. We will move on to that later.

But I guess I can’t really write a memoir on that, or should I? However, I guess I’ll have to tell my side of the story, don’t you think?

My life did turn into a Julia Roberts’ movie. Not in the ones I thought

It started with a dress, as red as Julia’s in Pretty Woman, a dress and someone helping me with a necklace. I guess by now, my name rings some stories and even though the stories are inverted, and I really feel like I shouldn’t be writing this, this was an open spot for me to speak my mind, to crawl out of my little corner where I liked to be invisible. In my constant pursuit of Julia Roberts’ life, I found myself in a very weird predicament.

I would love to think about it like that scene where he placed that gorgeous necklace around her bare neck, and it kind of stuck. Though, that scene led to a round of unfortunate events.

I fell in love, and though it doesn’t sound as a tragedy, it certainly involved into one, because I fell in love and then proceeded to get engaged… with another man.

It all continued, if I think about it, as “My Best Friend’s Wedding.” Though it sounds cheesy and different. And in no way was my ex-fiancée as Cameron Diaz. At least I don’t want to think that, I didn’t like Cameron in that movie, and I very much liked my ex-fiancé, too much for my own convenience. It’s not a sin, and I hope he’s doing amazing. I still love him.

I’m afraid I didn’t play Julia Roberts’ in that part. My best friend did, however, and I happened to be very in love with my best friend. Note to whoever is reading this: if you happen to be in love with your best friend, don’t make them your maid of honor.

Or do, and do yourself a favor, don’t let it be too late. If you love someone, tell them. If you love someone, don’t get engaged to someone else.

I guess that gives context to me.

If you were to take a few minutes to google me, I know my name is dragged with headlines which are not so pleasant to read. But hopefully, now I can be seen besides the many articles I’ve written. But a few months ago, I was painted as the bad one.

So, instead of rolling along, I decided, instead, to rename myself as yet another one of Julia’s characters. After all, that’s all I wanted to be.

“The Runaway Bride.” Sounds catchy.

Have control of my own life for once.

Because I did run away. And even if I think I should be giving no explanation to the world, I guess maybe I could use this chance to guide another person who lost herself along the way, too. Maybe you’ll find yourself reading this and understanding my words. You’re probably wondering why a runaway bride has been giving you advice on how to choose your jewels, or how to get your face prepped for your big day. Seems like a hypocrite, but I feel like someone who still believes in weddings even after running away from one, has something to say.

I’ve always been the perfect daughter, I’ve tried to, at least. I had perfect grades, got home early and didn’t cause much trouble. That was until I graduated, for sure. I’ve always done what everyone told me to do and I followed the path everyone expected me to follow.

My biggest sin has been falling in love with terrible timing, I’ve loved when I didn’t have to and I didn’t when I had to.

Timing really, that’s my biggest sin.

Most of my life I’ve known when to say no, and when to say yes. But it came to a point when saying those words would change me.

Both words have betrayed me and I am not proud of it. The first time it betrayed me was when someone got down on one knee, and even though I knew in my heart there was an indecisive voice inside, a yes came clear through my mouth.

Don’t get me wrong, at the time, I did mean it. Who would’ve thought that a simple word gave me such a nightmare?

I know, I know, why are they including me in the wedding section if I ran away from my own wedding? It sounds ironic, I was even skeptical when they asked me to.

Because even if it’s late to admit it, I may have not yet married anyone as of right now when I’m writing this, maybe someday it’ll be different. But I do know what love feels like. And I know what it doesn’t feel like.

And maybe you’ve read the articles and realized it, every advice I give you relies on something: It won’t matter in the end, because you’ll see them as you walk down the aisle, and everything will turn to be better.

Because saying “yes” should never bring in guilt. Probably, like most people, if you said yes, then you were sure of it and I truly hope you didn’t say “yes” just for the reason I now know I did. You shouldn’t say yes because you want to be loved, you should say yes because you want to love.

I’m a monster, I know. But I’ve learned a thing or two.

Someone once told me to picture my wedding. And I know, most of us have planned it since our childhood, some have pictured it perfectly, from the flowers to the band, some just know they want a big cake, or some only have been hovering through Pinterest boards. That’s alright.

But when the moment comes, it won’t matter. In the end, you won’t remember if the cutlery was gold or silver.

When you’re planning a wedding you see yourself through the different stages, there is a checklist that should be ticked, and time will rush to it. Everyone rushes you into thinking it should be perfect.

I even had a checklist and I would try to tick off every single box of it because it had to be perfect. But looking at it now, each and every one of those led to the disaster of me turning into Julia Roberts’ character and running the heck out of my wedding.

Because I gave myself such little time to understand that what I wanted was to be with someone else, and I shouldn’t have invited that said person to the wedding.

Let me tell you something, I had always wanted a certain wedding, I knew the theme, I wanted the flowers, the perfect venue. And I fell in love with an amazing wedding dress, everything was planned.

But someone told me that, in the end, it wouldn’t matter, because let me tell you something, I am very sure that when the right person comes, it won’t.

And they told me that what could go wrong would go wrong, but it wouldn’t matter as long as the love of my life was at the end of the aisle.

In my case, it did, everything went wrong. The flowers had been changed, the day before they’d told me the menu we had chosen was changed, too. My hair looked awful, I was not wearing the white dress I had chosen, and it wouldn’t have mattered. But it did, because my whole wedding was meant to be a disaster. Because they were small details, and they shouldn’t have mattered.

And trust me, at a point they didn’t.

I was walking down the aisle to commit the biggest mistake of my life. And if the love of my life hadn’t interrupted my wedding, I would have become Julia Roberts on Eat Pray Love. A sad wife.

But I knew that had it been the one who interrupted the wedding the one I was getting married to, it wouldn’t have mattered, I could’ve had paper rings, I could’ve had the ugliest of flowers, or no flowers at all, and I wouldn’t have cared, because he would’ve been at the end of the aisle.

Because that’s love. And right now as I turn around to the love of my life who is listening to his music and drinking a beer, I know it. I don’t need a checklist, I could marry him right now, wearing our pj’s and using ring pops. Yes, the actual candy. Because what matters is I want to spend the rest of my life with him, discovering his good and bad sides.

But to know this, I had to run away. And I’m not telling you to run away. But sometimes we have to be away from someone to realize they’re a part of us. Maybe you took the time to google me, or maybe you didn’t so I’ll give you a quick summary.

My best friend, and love fo my life stopped my wedding, I rejected him and then I ran away from the altar.

And maybe, you’re thinking, why not go with the love of your life?

Because I wasn’t ready. And I realized that one doesn’t have to choose. One shouldn’t have to choose.

So I chose myself. And saying goodbye to the love of my life wasn’t easy, you know?

It’s delicate, and my reputation could jeopardize his. That’s love you know? Knowing that sometimes you have to choose yourself and that sometimes you should make decisions so you don’t hurt them. But at some point you have to look up.

And I can’t stress this enough, if you don’t know yourself and you don’t know what you want, you can’t expect your significant other to know it, either.

But before I ran away, I had to make it clear that I wanted to come back to him. Which brings me to the next Julia Roberts movie, which is kind of stupid, I know. Notting Hill, then again, I wasn’t Julia in the situation. I gave away all my secrets, from someone who never liked to speak up, I had to.

Yes, like Hugh Grant did, I crashed a press conference and I confessed my love to him. Then we went our separate ways. At that point, I just saw how the whole world turned gray.

I thought to myself: ‘Is it too stupid? Maybe I regret it.’ And I just thought about it, an address I don’t want to remember, a city far away from home. A hotel that perfectly mirrors it. A time when saying no meant keeping secrets. And honestly, right now, I don’t mind having no secrets anymore, I am waiting to give them all away, when he’s ready, when I’m ready. Because now there are no limits I can think of.

And I changed, from wanting the perfect wedding, with every single detail the way I wanted it to, to the wedding that could be held in his living room. From wanting 300 hundred guests to being the two of us.

So here’s my advice to you, whoever you may be. Find a story, dream of something. Don’t get a boring life, go and try to find someone who’d understand you’d have to choose yourself first. Fall in love with yourself first and the wedding will follow along, and love, love without any inconvenience. Don’t be afraid to love, don’t hide away, don’t try to keep all your secrets. And make that checklist, and then do it for yourself, set your date, when you’re ready. Make that guest list so you have everyone you care and love, get the perfect place, the perfect food, and plan the most fun of the honeymoons.

But before anything else, find yourself and let the person you’re marrying find you, delicately, like a poem, let them read you. Because when you do this, when both of you choose yourselves and each other, nothing else matters, it’s just the strawberries decorating the care. And everything will turn out to be easy, even if love isn’t, the path will be opened and the limits of desire will finally go away.

And when you love someone, you’ll realize it, paper rings are enough. Because when your love is so strong, it won’t matter if they changed the cake, or if your bridesmaids’ dresses weren’t the colour you asked.

Maybe I don’t have the best experience, maybe my advice sucks, but I hope we can get along this journey. And I’ll be joining you in your path, help you out to stay away from the path of becoming the runaway bride like me. Helping you along the way to understand what love should feel like, helping you out to stay away from the mistakes I made. Helping you choose yourself so you can be ready to walk down an aisle. Helping you out to be the Julia Roberts you choose to be, not the one the world made you. Maybe I’ll find myself along the way, too, and maybe I’ll be ready to do it, too.

I know that by the time this comes out, I’ll be helping my friend with her wedding dress, and I know that she’ll be the happiest she could be. And with all my heart, I wish her the perfect wedding, paper or gold rings, I know she’s walking down an aisle to the love of her life. And I couldn’t be happier for her.

We’ll see how this goes.

Yours, truly,

The Runaway Bride

---

Being at the end of the aisle gives you a perspective. Maybe Tom was not the one who was at the actual end, but it felt weird. Especially considering what had happened just the night before, a secret he had to yet keep to himself.

He knew Harrison was sweating. And he knew that probably Harrison would feel even more butterflies than Tom, but the music started to play, the moment had come in, everyone turned around to look at how the bridesmaids were walking down the aisle led by y/n, Tom lost it. It felt good, it felt like magic. And the moment his eyes met hers he knew that he’d never regret the decision he’d made. And she looked at him like she was feeling the same thing, as if time had stopped for her as well, as if the music was for them and only them. As if she was whispering their secret, and he looked down at her hand, and smiled.

He saw the red dress, and he knew that for once, he’d chosen the right girl, who was wearing the wrong dress. And Tom had to stop himself, even if he desired to kiss her, he knew he’d have to stop. But she walked to the end of the aisle and was across from him.

Then, everything stopped as the bride was walking in, she looked perfect, with the veil cascading down and her eyes as bright as they could be. But Tom couldn’t look at her, he was too busy admiring y/n. And maybe it was a coincidence but she turned around and locked eyes with him, and he could see how she ran out of breath as she dedicated a smile to him, one that was made for him and only him. He felt his heart stop because they were speaking with their eyes, and he knew what she meant. He felt it too. And everyone was focusing on the bride but they could only look at each other, maybe it was selfish, maybe it wasn’t. Maybe the love around them was inspiring them.

‘I love you,’ they had mouthed to each other.

And Tom knew it, that their little secret was just a secret. Because this wasn’t their day, and they didn’t mind it wasn’t. But he knew that even if nobody had noticed the ring on y/n’s hand, it could’ve been made out of paper, and that if they had to set the date, they’d do,it the very next date, with only them as the guests and barely any theme. They didn’t need any flowers or any fancy venue, they didn’t need to mail the save the dates or hire a vendor. They could marry in their underwear, and they didn’t need to book a honeymoon and she needed no bridal shower, and the menu could be a chocolate cake and a strawberry cheesecake. Her something new could be a mere bracelet, and her something borrowed, old and blue could be a blue shirt of his. Their bridesmaids and the best man could be some random toys. But it wouldn’t matter, because they’d be tying the knot, and it wouldn’t matter because their vows would be perfect, and she’d finally say I do. And that was the only thing that mattered, that they’d be together.

Because that night, while they were dancing, Tom had chosen the right red dress. Because love is easy when the right person comes. Yes, they had their loads of difficulties, but it seemed that whenever they were together, everything just stopped, everything else was ordinary, everything was easy. They made mistakes, but everybody does.

Maybe Tom was not that prince charming to arrive on a white horse, and maybe y/n was not a princess either. Maybe they’ve been wrong this whole time, but they don’t want to hide anymore, because Tom may have tried to get in bed with the wrong girl years ago, but she turned out to be the right one. And y/n used to think that Tom had eyes for everyone for her, but whenever she was in the room, everything else disappeared. And yes, they had to run away to realize they’d run back into each other. Because maybe they’ve crossed the limits of desire, but maybe, they should’ve always been crossed.

The end.

aldsajkd it’s done bye i’m sad it’s over bye

previous chapter series masterlist Here’s my new story! Perfidy (enemies to lovers) one shot: Tom’s proposal

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bbykpoper · 4 years

Photo

𝓒𝓵𝓸𝓾𝓭𝓫𝓮𝓻𝓻𝔂 💐

Inspired by this post 🌼

Pairing: florist!yeosang x photographer!reader

Index: Jongho // Hongjoong // Seonghwa // San // Yunho // Wooyoung // Mingi

･*:༅

“We have the best wedding photographer on hand, she is currently at a photo shoot, so if you wish to see her work you are more than welcome to.” A tall young man spoke to the couple in front of them with a smile. “May I just say, it would be an honour to do your photos. Our whole studio simply adores your sweets!”

“Say it louder, I don’t think they heard how desperate you are Johnny.”

“Shut it Mark.”

Glares were exchanged. Small breathless laughs followed the exchange between the boys as the couple nodded in assurance.

“We’d love to work with your studio, and it would be really awesome if we could see the photographer at work!” Song Mingi exclaimed as he held his fianceé’s hand. “When do we leave?”

“Oh, you guys don’t have to go far.” The boy in the hoodie with glasses, named Mark, spoke from the corner. “They’re on the roof.”

“Wonderful, let’s go!”

Johnny was quick to guide them up the steps and through the door. The couple was met with a sight out of a fiction novel. There was a young beauty in a white dress standing in the middle of a field of dandelions the sun beautifully shading her figure on the ground as a bubbly you jumped from one side to another, your dark hair adorned with a very badly made flower crown.

“That’s her right there, the jumpy rabbit.” Mark pointed at the you in the cargo pants and flower crown on your head. “She’s overly excited sometimes.”

“Y/N!” Johnny yelled out, making you stop and turned to him, your facial features designed to murder him.

“What do you want Johnton?” You asked with a sigh. “Can it wait until the sun rises fully, I’m getting some good material here.”

“Oh yeah, no problem.” He waved. “We’ll just observe the magic.”

“Yeah yeah.” You ignored him as you went back to work, now bringing in the groom as well.

Mingi and his significant other watched you with vigour in their eyes, happy that they decided to go with their guts and come down to this particular studio to get a photographer for their big day. Johnny and Mark stood beside the couple and nodded knowing that you had just convinved them to pay you for a photo shoot.

“Congradulations on your day.” You said to the husband and wife as they happily left the vacinity of your studio. With a small smile on your face you turned towards your friends/roommates/co-workers and their new clients, a big question mark above your head. “Hi, I’m y/n. The main photographer here at NCT photos.”

“Hi, I’m Song Mingi and this is my future wife.”

“Welcome, take a seat please.” You said and sat in between Johnny and Mark. “How can we help you?”

“Our wedding is in a month and our photographer quit on us last minute.” He began explaining to you. “And a friend of ours reffered you guys, so we came here as soon as we could to see if we could book you guys to do our wedding.”

“So which date would that be?” You pulled out a small planner littered in stickers and opened it to the calendar page of the next month.

“It’s on the 7th.”

“That’s in a week.” Mark deadpanned his face embodying the pikachu meme.

“Yeah.” Both of them scratched their necks. “To be honest, I proposed three weeks ago.”

“Wow.” Johnny whistled and looked at his friends. “You think we could do this?”

“Where is the wedding?” You asked, just nodding at Johnny’s question.

“It’s going to be at our little home. The back yard is vast and there is space to do the shoot as well as hold the wedding.”

“Can we decorate the shoot according to your wishes?”

“Yes. We’ll provide you guys with everything. Except the flowers...” Mingi looked at you. “I want to have flowers which will fully bring out my future wife’s beauty. So I was hoping you could help me out.”

“Sure, no problem.” You gave a thumbs up. “I’ll just go down to Jihyo’s place later.”

“Great, we have a friend who works there.” Both said.

“You do?”

“Yeah, Kang Yeosang.”

･*:༅

The wheezing laughter that came from Mark had your eye twitching in annoyance. The three of you sat at Sugarberry’s, Johnny patting your shoulder in reassurance while Mark just kept on wheeze laughing while he tried to drink his watermelon flaovured lemonade. Ever since Mingi and his fianceé came by their studio wanting to book them as their photographers and the notion that Yeosang, your not so subtle fan, was their friend and your future co-worker had Mark dying.

You were friends with these two since elementary school. You guys went to the same middle and high school, only parting ways with Mark in college but still living together ever since. Johnny and you opened this small but very well known photography studio in your senior year of college and Mark jumped on the band wagon as a film maker and editor. Ever since then you guys were thriving in your job.

“Can you stop laughing?” You groaned out, sinking deeper into your hoodie. “I don’t think it’s that funny.”

“But it is.” He said, brushing off a tear from his eye. “You’ll be finally working together with Yeosang. How is that not funny?”

“You’re mean.” You mumbled underneath your breath.

“Come on Mark, y/n didn’t make fun of you when you had a crush on your visual arts teacher.” Johnny sighed, taking a bite of his pastry. “Remember, the teacher that had you all hot and bothered?”

“But why don’t you just admit it to yourself that you like him?” Mark suddenly straightened up at the mention of his college visual arts professor. “I mean you do like him?”

“I don’t know okay?” You sighed, playing with the straw of your coffee. “I do consider him to be attractive physically, but how can I like someone who I don’t even know?”

“Well, the easy answer is to get to know him.” Johnny shrugged his shoulders. “For now, you can at least tell him you’ll come to visit the flower shop.” He pointed at the blond boy who smiled shyly at you and waved, having you wave back.

“He didn’t hear our conversation, right?” You asked with an awkward smile on your face.

“I don’t think so.” Mark added, turning around to say hi to him. “You’re good.”

With a deep breath you stood up from your table and walked over to the boy who patiently waited in line to get to order his drinks. You softly tapped his shoulder to gain his attention and his ears turned a soft shade of pink when he figured out who was trying to gain his attention.

“Hi.” You softly greeted.

“Hi.” The smile which glowed on his face almost blinded your cat-like eyes.

“Came to get a drink?”

“Yeah. Jihyo has some orders and couldn’t go out to get us something to drink.” He nodded. “You guys done with work?”

“We’re just beginning.” You sighed. “Mingi booked us to work his wedding. I was surprised he decided to go through with a wedding only after three weeks of engagement.”

“Yeah, they actually pinned for each other for the past two years but were too dumb to notice the other.” Yeosang looked over at Mingi happily whistling in the back and making some cakes. “Oh to be in love.”

You looked up at him and got lost in the warmth he radiated from his body. The afternoon sun nicely shaped his facial features with those deep shadows and you had to control yourself as to not blush or show just how much it affected you.

“Yeah, must be nice.” Your eyes longingly stayed on him. “By the way, I’ll be dropping by the flower shop tomorrow. I need to pick out some flowers for Mingi’s photo shoot.”

“Really?” His eyes seemed to light up even more.

“Yeah, really.” You smiled at him.

“Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

･*:༅

Jihyo sat in silence and observed the two as they went about the shop considering some flowers which were supposed to fit the couple. Johnny also stood on the side next to Jihyo and snorted when both Yeosang and you touched hands as you went to take hold of a gardenia flower at the same time.

“Please tell me they’re not dumb like Mingi and his girlfriend.” Jihyo commented.

“No. They know that the other likes them, but y/n has a problem connecting with others who she doesn’t know on a friendly basis.” Johnny added. “It’s a good and bad thing at the same time.”

“So, they just need to be friends first?” Jihyo asked.

“I mean they technically are...?” The tall man sighed. “But yeah. They need to hang out a bit more.”

Jihyo sat in though for a few minutes before motioning to Johnny to follow her lead.

“Guys, I need to go out and pick up some stuff for the shop so I’m leaving this little task of picking the best flowers to you Yeosang.” Jihyo said, and grabbed Johnny to drag him out. “I will need Johnny’s help too. Have fun y/n.”

“Good luck.” You waved at them, not really paying attention or mind to anything.

Yeosang caught on quickly to Jihyo’s plan because she basically gave him a thumbs up and wink to go for it. He suddenly became very nervous and skittish and you noticed it.

“What’s wrong?” You asked him.

“Nothing.” He simply answered. “How about making some flower crowns for them? I know Mingi’s wife would like some.”

“Great idea!” You exclaimed clapping your hands together, but quickly coming to terms with a small problem. “Only... I’m shit at making those.”

“You can’t be that bad-” You pulled out your camera and showed him some pictures of Mark mocking your hand woven flower crown. “-okay, you’re just not experienced. But I can teach you.”

And so, you spent the next two hours learning how to properly make flower crowns and finally succeeded in making a beautiful one out of the small flowers of a cloudberry.

“I did it!” You smiled at Yeosang widely.

“Yeah. You did.”

The dreamy look in his eyes had you blushing furiously as a sudden thought ran through your mind. Somehow you’ve come to know Yeosang a bit more through this little activity the both of you did and it gave you courage that maybe, the crush you had on him, and the crush he had on you, could work out into something more. But you had to be sure, so you took the next step.

“So, because I have to get everything ready and in order for the wedding next week, do you want to help me out?” You asked, your ears burning from the heat your cheeks produced.

Yeosang blinked a few times but nodded, shy and small, a smile playing on his lips.

“I’d love to.”

“Great. Is it okay if you come over tomorrow after your shift?”

“As in, come over to your home?”

“Yeah, I share an appartment with Johnny and Mark next to the NCT studio. Both of them have other business to attend to so they won’t be home and we can work in peace.” God this seemed to be so intimate but not at the same time. “You can say no if you’re uncomfortable.”

“No!” He suddenly said making you frown and avert your gaze. “No, I didn’t mean it like that.” He quickly corrected himself. “What I meant to say was that I am not uncomfortable and it’s totally fine being alone with you.” Great Yeosang, now she will think you’re desperate. “I’ll come over after 4 p.m.”

“Awesome.” Johnny came in with Jihyo just as you said. “Johnny look, I finally made a normal flower crown.” You flaunted your handy work to your friend. “All thanks to Yeosang.”

“Nice. Let’s go show it to Mark and make him suffer for ever mocking your crooked ones before.” He laughed. “See you around guys.”

“See ya.” You waved at them both and left the shop.

“So did it help being alone with her?” Jihyo asked, glancing at a blushy mess of a co-worker.

“Yes. I’m going over to her place tomorrow.” He whispered out, squating down and holding his face in his arms. “God, I feel like a high school kid who had his first kiss.”

Jihyo laughed and patted the man’s shoulder reassuringly. You managed to make Mark swallow his words and admit you did an awesome job with these new flower crowns. The day had ended with you laying in your bed, your head on your soft pillow with thoughts of Yeosang drifting you off to sleep, the flower crown you made proudly placed on your bed-side table as the night shifted darker.

･*:༅

“We made quite a lot haven’t we.” Yeosang commented as he finished his 40th dandelion crown since he came over. “What are we gonna do with so many?”

“Give them out to the guests. It’ll look nice in the photos.” You shrugged your shoulders as you texted Mingi’s future wife to tell her the plan. “She agreed to it. And Mingi seems to be excited.”

“Yeah, he does that when it comes to her.” Yeosang smiled solemnly.

“We’re done for today. The rest of the work is mostly on Mark and Johnny’s shoulders now.” You smiled and looked outside.

It was about 5.45 p.m. and you knew that soon the sun was going to set. You looked over to the window and noticed the furry friend you were waiting for and opened the glass which separated you two to have him jump into your arms and lick your nose slightly.

“Where have you been Dandelion?” You asked the grey cat as he purred in your hold. “Want some tuna with that love of yours.” You joked and placed him down before opening a can and placing it in his bowl so he can freely munch on it.

“You have a cat?” Yeosang asked, observing the interaction with soft eyes.

“Yeah. Technically he is a stray but likes to cuddle from time to time. He hates Mark and Johnny for some reason, but likes me and dandelion flowers, hence the name.” You shrugged your shoulders as you petted his head while he ate. “By the way, wanna see something cool?”

“Sure.” Yeosang stood up as you jumped out the window onto the connecting roof of a building next to your appartment.

He followed your lead as you kept walking and climbing on to a spot which had an outdoor lounge are filled with bean bags and a small wooden table.

“This is a secret rest area for the NCT studio which I usually use to take pictures of the sunset.” You said, plopping down on one of the bean bags. “Take a seat. You want something cold to drink?”

“Sure.” You grabbed two iced-teas and turned to give him one but were met with Dandelion cozying up to him instead.

“So he likes you.”

“It seems so.” He laughed and took the tea you offered him, opening it swiftly with one hand. “It’s so beautiful.”

You looked over at the setting sun. “Yeah. It is.” You took a sip of your tea and sneakily took a photo of Yeosang and your cat. “By the way. I have something to tell you.” You were now certain.

“What’s up?” Yeosang turned to look at your profile which was being bathed in the setting sun.

“I like you.” You said, not daring to look at him before taking a deep breath. “I like you more than a friend.”

Your eyes met for a brief second, you holding your breath as you waited for any type of reaction. The sudden blush which creeped up to his ears and down to his neck was a bit worrying but you still waited. He looked down at his hands and pinched his cheek to see if he was dreaming or not.

“I like you too. More than a friend.” He whispered out and laughed to himself holding his face in his hands, before finally pulling you to him, and placing his chin on your head. “I’m so happy. Like really happy to know the feeling is mutual.”

“Me too.” You said, burrying your face into his shoulder. “I want to try dating. Like, couple stuff too. And everything that goes with it.” You mumbled. “I think I can trust you.”

“Then we will do all that!” He said looking at you.

The both of you placed your foreheads against each others, smiling like idiots. The sun set in the background peacefully as Dandelion purred in Yeosang’s lap. Life was beautiful, serene and fluffy.

Just like the clouds and berries of this series.

#ateez imagines #kang yeosang #ateez #ateez reaction #cloudberry

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