#because anything kids can enjoy is lame

[thenotoriousscuttlecliff]

The Snyderverse was a artistic hollow, emotionally stunted, intellectually shallow era of movies made by and for those who just want things to look badass, cool, and aggressively masculine.

[emmyrosee]

this is for the non curse bf!sukuna

when you first start going out he wouldn’t know what flowers to get you. he could ask you but- who tf asks their gf ‘hey what flowers do you like?’ he thinks that’s lame. so guy brings 5-6 diff flowers just for you.

can you imagine, him all tattooed and brooding buying you flowers in a pretty flower shop😭😭i’m crying :((((((

OKAY BUT IF HE DOES IT TO LIKE, ASK YOU TO BE HIS GF???

Like originally he was just going to take you out on a few dates, enjoy the company and yuuji and his Ma off his back, but that plan crumbled when he started to be the one to text you first. When he started to initiate dates. When he started to feel butterflies in his chest when you laughed.

Yuuji so graciously told him he had feelings and should cuff you before you get tired of him, and the idea swirls for a bit in Sukuna’s head before one night at four am, he storms into yuuji’s room and in a pure panic asks “how do I ask her out?”

Yuuji grumbles and throws a pillow at his brother, “flowers and candy, go back to bed.”

But Ryomen does anything but. Because there’s so many flowers and so many candies, how will he know which is your favorite? And as much as he’d love to ask you, it would ruin the surprise of being so excited at being his girlfriend that you’d have to say yes- a little manipulative, perhaps, but he’s not perfect despite what he says.

So he kinda goes… crazy.

He buys you all sorts of candy, everything from sour to chocolate, to even some cotton candy grapes and gummy bear watermelon and more candy flavored candy, all to put in a small bag that dangles from his thick wrist.

Next is the flower shop, and that’s even more stressful because how is he supposed to pick between roses and peonies and assorted and god knows what other breeds of flowers there are- one time, as a kid, he saw yuuji give a little boy a fistful of yellow dandelions, can’t he just do that?

According to the swipe of his credit card after picking out seven bouquets…. No. Apparently not.

He lugs everything out to his car with grunts of efforts, texting you telling you to be home because the smell of flowers is making him nauseous and the candy is probably melting in the warmth of the sun.

SENT please tell me you’re home?

Schnookums (god he needs to change that, why’d you ever put yourself as something so feral in his phone?) why, you coming over??

SENT no I’m making conversation

Tf

Of course that question means I’m coming over

Schnookums yayyyy okay 🥺💙

He scoffs before making a floor to your house, nerves making him speed a little too fast and almost run a few too many red lights, and he’s grateful that the cops he passed have mercy on him and let him get to your house without a ticket or handcuffs.

He gathers his bundle back in his arms and blindly makes his way up your driveway, using the sheer grace of the gods watching over him to not trip and crush everything under him. He sneezes god knows how many times, and once he’s finally at your door, he doesn’t know how long it takes him to knock successfully, but after 5 tries, he finally nails it.

And after a few short seconds, you open the door with a gasp of excitement. “What did you do!”

“I wasn’t- fuck!” The flowers start to slip as he tries to peer over them to look at you. You’re quick to make a move to help him catch them. “Fuck. God damn it. Ugh.” He clears his throat, “I wasn’t sure what flowers to get, so… I bought them all.”

“Whats in the bag?”

“An absolutely feral amount of sweets.”

You’re beaming at him, so excited between the gesture and seeing him that you immediately toss your arms around him, the crinkling of the bouquets being what snaps you back to life.

“Ah shit.”

“Sorry! Sorry!! I just… this is so sweet,” you say, smiling.

“Well, I uhh…. I wanted… you and I’ve been kinda… going out for a while….”

“Yeah?” You ask, and with the way your eyes widen and jaw slacks slightly, you know what he’s going to ask.

And he knows you’re going to make him do it.

“And I really… really have enjoyed it.” He takes a deep breath, “not sure why, but-“

“Shut up,” you snicker.

“But I kinda… want to do it. More. And… not let you do it with other people.”

“Okay,” you giggle.

“And I’m told the only way to do that is to make you my girlfr-“

“YES!” You scream, wrapping your arms around him again, and when he makes a noise of protest, you grab the flowers to put them on the ground, hugging him again tightly.

Tightly enough his organs hurt and his breath can’t get into his body, but this feels so right, so good and so comforting that he’d let you do it forever. He kisses your head and cradles it, letting the bag rest against your back.

“I can’t believe you went through all this trouble for me,” you murmur against him.

He chuckles, “don’t thank me too much yet. We still need to find vases for all of these because I’ll be damned if I let my kind gesture die within twelve hours.”

“I don’t even know if I own a vase.”

He stiffens, and you snicker in his grip.

“Well then I hope your don’t like your kitchen sink too much.”

[shotorozu]

(gender neutral reader, reader went to middle school with bakugou and midoriya, reader can make chocolate, and reader bent their back for the making of said chocolate, not that much beta read /derogatory, i got carried away 😭)

bakugou katsuki is a feared, but admired guy— especially during valentines day.

it’s interesting.. when he was a younger boy— he’d take gifts from admirers (usually girl classmates or other kids that frequent the park he goes to) with widened eyes and a scoff, snatching the gift away from them with quick hands, and mumbling how valentines day is stupid— that it’s lame and he doesn’t understand it.

but refusing gifts are rude, he’d remember his mom say, after he refused to accept something his dad made for him— and back then, he’d listen to his mom like his life depended on it. so, for a year or two— he’d take gifts.

but as the blond boy manifested a quirk and became just a bit older— he started ignoring her words altogether, having had grown out of the “listening to mom all the time is cool” phase.

his features started defining themselves, and he was starting to become taller. before he knew it— he had a sudden wave of admirers crashing down at him almost everyday of the year.

and it almost excluding valentines day.

because he’d sneer at anyone willing to offer their affection in the form of sweetened confectionary, and resorted to blowing up love letters into smithereens.

if his personality wasn’t obvious enough, this was precisely the reason why his admire-from-afar to get-personal ratio was obviously imbalanced.

of course, no one really learns— even as he grows older, enters UA for highschool, and retains his personality even after some realizations, because bakugou katsuki is quite beautiful.

so there’s at least a handful of admirers that are willing to risk it all— even if it meant some form of humilation or intimidation.

but not you.

you’ve prepared a little something for everyone in your class— yes, even the forbidden grape haired classmate and him. your hands practically hurt from stirring, and you feel like if you’d even bend up slightly, you’d hear multiple cracks amass from your back.

but you think it’s all worth it. your work tastes good, looks good and cute, and you’re certain everyone would enjoy how their chocolates varied in flavor, even if the change was just slightly noticeable.

you hand out chocolates to each respective person as soon as they pop into the common room.

the girls of your class perk up in interest and clamor around you— smiles adorning their faces as they line up to receive their chocolates.

mina, kyouka and hagakure compare their flavors together, momo asks you how you did it, because she’s “bad at cooking”

ochako’s already munching on the sweets, when he starts thanking you. finally, tsuyu just looks at you silently, and gives you a warm side hug.

midoriya goes beet red when he realizes that you personally gave everyone a slightly different flavor (you don’t know how he blushed over that, but you find it endearing.) todoroki, tokoyami, shoji, sato, koda, and ojiro look a little confused and dazed at first when you give them your chocolates, but they end up accepting it with gratitude.

kirishima, iida, kaminari, sero, aoyama and mineta accept your chocolates rather quickly, wasting no time in giving their thanks (excluding mineta— who just teased you about liking him, which was and will never be the case)

but through it all, you managed to avoid eye contact with your snarky blond childhood friend and classmate— who was silently trailing you with crimson eyes the entire time.

for a moment you think he’s mad at you for not giving anything, which you’d understand— if it weren’t for the fact that he is valentines day’s #1 public enemy. but you exchange this thought for something else.

he must think that you’re strange for making the class chocolate, and you wouldn’t blame him. usually, it’d be sato making stuff like this. not to mention, you heard him remark rather loudly about the kitchen smelling strongly of chocolate, in his usual bakugou tone.

you made the right choice not to give him the chocolates you made, you think to yourself. not to mention, how amidst it all, you might’ve showed a slight bias to his chocolate’s design— and revealing your crush on him on today of all days is less than ideal.

and you think nothing of his behavior—

“s’ i’ve got nothing, huh?”

he jumpscares you when you close your locker, and he lets out a snort when your shoulders rise in reflection of your surprise.

your gaze trails to his locker, which cannot close due to a lump of chocolate and letters preventing it from properly doing so. “you’ve got plenty, though. i don’t want to give you diabetes or anything.”

(which was half true because wow the amount of chcolate—)

“you gave all of them chocolate. why’da do that?”

“because.. it’s valentines day..?” you start walking away from your locker— and to which he follows all the way. you try not to think much of the action

“but what makes you think that i shouldn’t get any.”

normally, one would state that as a question, but the way he said it, the tone of his voice— it wasn’t said like one.

“i know you, kachaan,” you reason while making use of his childhood nickname, which gains an eye twitch from the blond. “if i was told to count how many letters you’ve burned and chocolates you either gave away or thrown out, i wouldn’t have enough fingers on my hands.”

“‘cause all of them were fuckin’ store bought?”

“and what if they weren’t?”

“then they were horrendous.” he states, matter of a fact. then, his eyes narrow, “and it’s not like you’re giving me a damned letter.”

you feel your cheeks heat up. that’s not the case— but the idea of writing him a love letter has your mind going into haywire.

“it’s not. but you’ve never showed interest in this sorta thing in a long time.”

“what— eating chocolates?”

“pretty much.”

he blinks, unamused. “you can be such a dumbass sometimes. can’t take the fucking hint.”

you’re pretty sure he meant to say that quietly, but he didn’t. you’re unphased at this point.

but you don’t get what he means, so you try to defend yourself. “but—” your words come to a sudden halt, as you realize the uselessness.

“wait, why am i trying to reason with you?— look, i actually did make something for you too. if i didn’t then that’d be such an asshole move of me to exclude you.”

“really. you’re not bullshittin’ me?”

“no.” you reply, firmly. “but you have to promise not to laugh. you can insult me, but laugh? no way.”

he raises an eyebrow.

then, you shift onto one leg and start looking for something in one of the front pockets of your bag. the search doesn’t take long, because you pull something out— medium sized chocolate in clear wrapping, with an orange bow tying it together.

it’s clearly slightly bigger than the rest of your classmates, and you hope he doesn’t notice.

he silently unwraps the chocolate, and gets eye to eye with your creation. it’s three pieces of chocolate shaped as explosions— the middle explosion being bigger than the other two. anyone who sniffed it could smell orange first, as the middle (biggest) piece has a swirl of orange and milk chocolate, the left piece is simply milk chocolate, and the right piece is white chocolate.

he takes the middle one and bites half of it, and chews. you observe, like he’s a top chef reviewing your latest work, and when he finishes, he says—

“not bad,” he remarks, flashing that heart racing smile. “wanna taste?”

you gulp, stupefied by his offer. words don’t have real meanings for a second. “huh?”

then, he’s reaching up and popping the other half into your mouth, thumb pressing against your lips.

you almost choke— and it wasn’t from the chocolate. you bite, taste the flavor, the mouth watering taste of orange and chocolate swarming your mouth.

to twist the knife into the wound— he cups your face and presses a deep, but quick kiss against your lips. his soft lips linger onto yours, and this intensifies what you can already taste.

and then, as quick as he kissed you, he pulls back— gaze still lingering on your lips.

a toothy grin starts to grow on his lips, and he pats your shoulder— beginning to create distance between you two by walking ahead.

“next time, give me the chocolates first, will ya? tastes fuckin’ good.”

you have a feeling he isn’t talking about the chocolate.

[erzva]

big fan of pussy drunk ! luffy..

. . .

its canon to me idk

like if your brain doesn’t register this as canon or something that’s very in character for luffy you’re just wrong

although i do also definitely see him as aroace or think he could be aroace

but if i were to strictly hc him as aroace it wouldn’t really be any fun for me, a luffy lover.

so i also see him as someone who loves sex. not in a weird way. he just loves you and making you feel good. and feeling good himself. + it’s so fun. everyone knows luffy is weak to things that are fun. idk i just think he would enjoy sex a lot with the person he loves.

or i can honestly also see him being aromantic but pansexual. and just liking sex as an activity. he’s a very active kid so, again, i think he would enjoy sex. bc sex can be fun and intimate and enjoyable

like there’s no way he wouldn’t wanna try it. he loves trying new things. you’re telling me he wouldn’t go feral after his first time with you? you opened his mind to something new and very fun

he’ll be asking for sex all the time now.

this man is mischievous and annoying. he does whatever he sets his mind to

so there’s not really telling him no.

ofc he won’t force you

but he’s exceptionally skilled at getting people to do whatever he wants.

he’ll make you come around sooner or later

because once he’s set on wanting to bury his cock into your warm cunt, he won’t stop until he gets to do it

he will start whining and begging if you don’t give him what he wants right away

especially if you give a lame excuse like “the others will hear” or “what if someone walks in”. if you pull any of tha, he knows he can be annoying and pushy.

but he also knows when you’re serious about your ‘excuses’ or “no’s” so he’d just drop it and opt for the second best thing in the world after meat: you. touching you, hugging you, clinging to you.

bc even if he can’t have sex with you, which is always so much fun and feels good- he doesn’t mind because it’s not important to him. being with you is enough

and honestly you were only truly against having sex very rarely. like when you were feeling unwell or it was an unfitting moment or whatnot. but you liked having him work for it. because you know that eventually he’ll start being whiny and desperate. oh and how you loved desperate luffy. begging with his big dark chocolate brown eyes.. and whining into your ear while rubbing himself on you, trying to hide what’s going on by disguising it as a hug so it doesn’t look too suspicious to your poor crewmates who unfortunately already know what he’s doing anyway..

until you finally give in and give him what he wants only for him to give you the biggest most genuine sunshine smile ever. his eyes widening at you giving him the go. it’s probably what you love most about him. his smile and how his entire face lights up..

however when it’s just the two of you in the captains chambers his expression turns dark and serious very fast. usually with a hint of mischief but not always. he can be very serious in moments like this too. you made him wait long enough. no time for silliness

there’s two types of pussydrunk ! luffy

he goes feral and it’s messy, chaotic and desperate. fast and rough, anything to get the two of you to reach climax.

slow loving sensual passionate sex. the kind of sex that really shows how much you love one another. the kind everyone dreams about. it feels good and it’s emotional

whenever he just wants to have fun and feel good, he’ll opt for the first version. the kissing would be hungry, passionate and desperate. he’ll be kissing and sucking on your neck and groping you harshly to get you wet. he’s impatient and just wants to cum deep inside of you. but not before he gets to lap at your delicious cunt. first things first. luffy never starts penetration without getting you nice and wet with his tongue beforehand.

but when he’s feeling sappy and emotional and loving the sex would be very sensual. but not necessarily slow. you still wanna cum after all. but the foreplay would be a lot more soft and gentle and he would take his time with you. kissing you everywhere thoroughly and massaging your flesh.

he doesnt only get pussydrunk for his cock inside your cunt though

he also gets pussy drunk when eating you out

oftentimes wanting to go more than one round

usually sex with him includes making out heavily, him eating your cunt, penetration / you grinding on him / you giving him a hand or blowjob- and then him eating you out again.

he is a MUNCH. he’s gonna be all up in your pussy

i mean he loves eating and never cared about what he looks like while eating (which is usually very chaotic and dirty) so you bet he’s gonna be just as messy when it comes to you and your cunt

he buries his face so deep in your pussy it’s overstimulating sometimes because he doesn’t stop once you cum. he stops when he wants to stop

sex isn’t sex without him getting a taste of you

and he oftentimes only wants to eat your pussy

keyword being “eat” bc it really does feel like he’s eating you alive (in the best most fulfilling way possible)

craziest head game in the entire op universe

he eats you out before going to sleep a lot. ‘helps him sleep better’ he claims

but he also wants to eat you out when he wakes up

he’s still groggy and tired and not really awake at all so he asks you to let him burry his face in your sweet warm cunt so he can ‘have a good day’ and also because it ‘helps him become more awake’

sure..

maybe you really do help him that way.. or maybe they’re mostly cheap excuses

and usually him being pussydrunk on eating you out leads to him wanting to burry his cock inside of you

because licking and tasting you is just so arousing. it makes him so hard and needy, always rutting his hips into the mattress while his tongue’s all over you. you taste like nothing he’s ever tasted before and he can’t get enough of it. he loves smelling and tasting your pussy. it makes him desperate, whiny and feral

you are never left feeling unsatisfied with luffy as your man

. . .

[s1aywalker]

꒰ა ♱ ໒꒱ little miss scare all. ꨄ

↷ ✩ —— sam monroe x alt! girlfriend reader headcanons. (nsfw 18+)

notes: a little slutty a little smutty! minors do not interact or else i'll collect your kneecaps. can we please stop kidding ourselves... this dude wants a goth girlfriend. and it's my duty as the resident metalhead mommy to serve my community. one alt!reader fic at a time.

| | | | she's got a date at midnight with nosferatu. oh baby, lily munster ain't got nothing on you. ⋆˚࿔

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe is, first and foremost, a fucking hater for the fun of it. the type of dude that calls anyone who doesn't listen to anything he deems cool a poser. the type of dude that sees a chick wearing a metallica shirt that she got from the thrift store and, with a straight face, tells her to name three albums without missing a single beat. so he thinks it's pretty fucking sick to have a girlfriend that can keep up with his, perhaps to most, acquired tastes in music.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who is ridiculously stubborn but secretly loves when you introduce him to new bands. he always acts like they're just okay after you popped the cd you recently bought into his stereo, and sometimes he'll even lie and say he already knows who they are. that he discovered them months ago. but then it's a few songs deep into the album, and wait... why is this actually fucking good?

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who is an absolute nightmare to argue with. even when it's not serious, when it's just having differing opinions on silly things like which vocalist is better, which album is the best. he's so stuck on his own likes and dislikes and everything is, as fred durst would say, his way or the highway. it's almost like he enjoys arguing with you... and maybe he does, because you can be just as stubborn when it's a topic as passionate as music, and he thinks it's cute when you stand your ground. he stopped actually caring about the argument ten minutes ago, and now he's just trying to piss you off because he thinks it's funny.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who has broadened his musical horizons thanks to you. bands like type o negative and h.i.m that constantly incorporate very obvious "romantic" themes into their songs never really did anything for him because he thought it was lame and corny. until he had to endure you constantly listening to them. now he'll claim his enjoyment of them is from a form of stockholm syndrome... but maybe he just never had a person that he could relate them to before he met you. he thinks about you when he hears be my druidess or for you. plus, they're one hell of an aphrodisiac, and he quickly discovered just how easy it is to get a hand under your bra or in your pants when they're playing.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who loves fishnets... maybe to an unhealthy degree. every time he sees you wearing them, he can't help but think about how good they make your legs look, how good he knows your ass looks under that skirt, and the thoughts of him tearing them to shreds instantly begin to flood in. and that's exactly what he does, the second he gets the chance. those poor tights never stand a chance in the same room as him... he'll promise to get you another pair while he's slotted between your legs and your hips are lifted, a promise he only keeps half the time. as his fingers dig into the fabric and start ripping them apart like it's the easiest thing in the world. like that's what those little tiny holes were made for. it's foreplay to him. but sometimes he's too impatient to even get them all the way off. sometimes he'll rip the crotch and push your panties aside to fuck you with a nice view of your legs still covered.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who encourages your piercing urges. you mention wanting a new hole in your ear or nose? he's on board. when you mention wanting your tongue pierced? that's hot. immediate filthy thoughts of what it would feel like when you guys are sucking face nasty style. or better yet, what it would feel like rubbing against his cock. when you mention wanting your nipples done? he thought he was going to have a stroke on the spot, and he's offering to make the appointment for you if it means seeing that in his face as soon as possible. he'll even hold your hand and let you squeeze him until your knuckles are white while you're getting them done. but once it came time for the boring aftercare part, his excitement drops the second he hears about healing time.... weeks? he has to wait weeks to put them in his mouth? but he'll make those weeks worth it once you've given him the go ahead. he's actually fucking feral about it when you do.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who lets you do his eyeliner. honestly, he's a little envious how good you can make yours look. effortlessly sharp and smoky. and you've always teased him about how shitty he does his. how he holds the pencil, how he has zero technique and just smudges it on with his fingers and doesn't even wash his hands afterward. so you jump on the chance to do it for him... it's only a bonus for both of you that you get to sit on his lap and be inches away from each others pretty faces. he's grumpily telling you not to poke his eye out and pretending he's not getting hard from the proximity alone. you notice... it's literally impossible to not feel it. and now you're trying to hurry this little makeover before you get the urge to ride his fucking thigh... but that's what you end up doing anyway. he's got one eye done and that pencil is long forgotten while his own hands are guiding your hips as they drag across his leg, searching for more of that friction his jeans provided. whining and desperate while he's saying how cute it is that you just couldn't wait five more minutes.

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ sam monroe who fucks you in the shitty venue bathroom, one covered in stickers and flyers and permanently tainted with the stench of beer, while the equally as shitty opening band plays. it's not romantic. it's hard and fast, sloppy and impatient. because he has you bent over in the stall, repeatedly slamming his cock into your cunt and not caring about how loud it might be. the downtuned guitar and blast beats raging on outside the door works as both a brutal soundtrack to his brutal rhythm, and to muffle every grunt and moan that reverberates against the cramped space. there isn't enough time to be sweet and caring, because this set is about to end and you guys still have to secure a good spot in the pit... but he'll still kiss you and rub his thumb at the mascara bleeding under your eyes, while he's stuffing his cock back into his pants and you're wiping the cum dripping down your inner thigh.

[gabessquishytum]

Chef Hob is catering Morpheus Endless's wedding to Alex Burgess and he's not really happy about it, but Dream is Hob's best friend and even if he won't listen to Hob that the marriage is a bad. idea!! Hob will do his part to make it a happy event. 😬

Dream won't even tell Hob why he has to go through with his parents dumb "arranged" marriage; Dream has never liked Alex Burgess (when they were kids, they never thought Alex was anything but lame; and it's not like Alex became scintillating as he grew up!).

And (in the privacy of an empty room) Hob will admit that he is in love with his best friend and that might have a little (🤏🏽) to do with his absolute aversion to Dream marrying anyone (else). But if he was happy or in love, Hob would be the first to be celebrating for and with his Dream (sad for himself, but so happy for Dream). But Dream is not!

Dream is miserable - he hates to suit he has to wear (if he was getting married to Ho the love of his life, he would be wearing a dress); he hates the venue; he hates all the people that are invited; he hates the decorations & colors; he hates the necessity of marrying Alex.

The only thing Dream got to choose was having Hob cater - Hob is a fantastic man chef. And was an "acceptable" choice for an Endless wedding, at least according to Dream's mother.

Everyone, Hob, everyone, is trying to get him to not go through with this wedding, but they don't know what Dream knows. He doesn't have a choice if he wants to keep the people he loves safe.

Maybe he can steal a moment with Hob before the wedding starts.

Listen. This is incredible. I have so many thoughts about this.

Hob knows that something is up (he's not as dumb as he looks, thanks very much Mrs Endless). There's not a whole lot he can do, sure, but being a chef does mean that he has access to certain dangerous weapons and, of course, poisonous substances. So when Dream does finally get a word with Hob at the very last moment, Hob is holding a steak knife and he's like "okay, okay. you might have to go through with the ceremony, but the reception? the reception is where this whole thing ends." Dream tries to persuade Hob that he can't murder Alex at the wedding reception for like, a billion reasons, but it's time for the wedding and Dream has to admit that he doesn't want to persuade Hob out of the murder plan all that much.

The wedding is awful. Hob knows how much Dream hates everything about it. But it's okay, it'll all be over soon and maybe some day Dream can have another wedding that he actually enjoys (Hob isn't planning that far ahead but he loves Dream SO much okay).

And yeah. It's a huge tragedy. First Alex starts choking on a bit of the wedding cake. People try to save him but it's already too late! How awful! And you wouldn't believe it but Roderick also chokes on a bit of cake too! Sadly he also passes away. It's so sad. And nobody can say that its foul play, because they just choked! And the chef (Hob) even tried the heimlich on Alex - of course it was a shame that he accidently broke his neck, but it is a very violent maneuver! These things happen!

Dream is naturally devastated, especially as he inherits the entire Burgess fortune (and all the fortunes of the people that the Burgesses were blackmailing, including Dream’s own entire family). It's such a burden that Dream donates it all to a Choking Awareness charity. In memory of his dear first husband.

He still can't work out how Hob did it. Maybe Hob will tell him, one day, when all the dust has settled and they've both moved overseas together, to start a new life. But Hob does say that the cake he makes for Dream’s second wedding will be much, much more palatable than the first <3

[silverzoomies]

silverzoomiezzz hi hi i was eating my cloudberry ice cream and i dont know why i start to think about peter and then i think about you. and i have a question for you. what do you think peter’s fav snacks that he would save it for you because he wanted you to enjoy and love it as much as he does? this is so silly lol but anyway have a great summer <3

💗oh my gosh, hello anon sweetie !! i'm sorry for answering so late !! i hope your summer has been nice !! it's been pretty decent here, aside from the lame ass humidity.🔥🫠🔥

i'm so honored you would think of me, after thinking of our beloved speedy boy. 💗honestly, i take that as such a huge compliment !!

⚡snacks i think peter maximoff would like (he hoards them, cuz he's the snack hoarding type. ty dofp 💗):

⚡in canon, he hoards hostess snack cakes. specifically the chocolatey, cream-filled kind ⚡and twinkies. dude's got twinkies for two movies in a row ⚡like it's no wonder people assume he's a twinkie fiend ⚡we also see him with so much pepsi and mtn dew ⚡and i know it's just product placement obvi. but he does seem like a mtn dew guy, right? i bet he'd love baja blast. code red too ⚡dk if this counts as a snack, but he'd probably love taco bell. i mean, it's fast. it's cheap. it's addictive. it's easy to indulge in. mans would quote those old taco bell commercials with the chihuahua ⚡sour candy. all of it. gummy worms, airhead x-tremes, sour twists, sour patch kids. tell me i'm wrong. i'm not ⚡he'd make a mess with some fun dip, lemme tell ya ⚡any candy they used to give out on halloween? he'd be addicted to all that shit. he'd love sugary junk. he constantly needs his fix. laffy taffy, nerds, now and laters, skittles, pop rocks, m&m's - you name it, he's into it ⚡imagine the dorito fingers, anon. the cheeto fingers. the takis fingers. do y'all think he'd be more into regular cheetos, or hot cheetos? he reads as a hot cheetos guy to me ⚡he'd slam some icees. slurpees. any kinda syrupy, frozen drink. he mixes all the flavors, sucks it down, and feels no brain freeze ⚡if you took him to carnivals, boardwalks, or amusement parks; he'd put the funnel cake stands out of business ⚡sweets are his kryptonite, really ⚡i personally like to imagine he knows his fair share of international snacks too. since he can zip around the world in a blink. taiyaki. baklava. conchas. tres leches. pirozhki. european chocolate. any and all kinds of street food. he knows all the best 7-eleven instant ramen - and the best toppings for 'em too ⚡i think he'd also go hog wild over a really good steak, y'know? or some barbecue. some ribs. some brisket. all the shmeats !!

⚡snacks i think peter maximoff would save, just so he could share them with you💗:

⚡he wouldn't ⚡correction: he couldn't ⚡c'mon, do you honestly think he'd have the self control? ⚡you're asking him to do the impossible ⚡see, anon, he'd think about saving a yummy treat for you ⚡keyword being think ⚡like, just as he starts to realize he's crushing on you big time ⚡he's guzzling something tasty, when he has the thought: hey...wait a sec! you'd probably really like this!! ⚡but a second later, the treat's already gone. devoured in an instant. whoops! oh well!! ⚡he's just way too impulsive to save anything ⚡like it would have to be out of sight, out of mind ⚡or you'd have to pick from his own, secret stash ⚡because otherwise, he can't hold himself back. he'll gorge any snacks in the nearest vicinity ⚡he'd legit have to wait 'til you were both together. in that moment. if you had a few minutes. he'd be like, "hey. babe. babe. babe. babe. i got somethin' i wanna show you." ⚡he speeds you away for some mind-blowingly good street food, in some country you've never been to, nor heard of ⚡even on valentine's day. he has to snag you one of those heart-shaped boxes of chocolates last minute ⚡that, or he has to hide it from himself. if he doesn't, he'll be lookin' down at an empty box - chocolate all over the corners of his mouth - like "ah, shit."

[suzukiblu]

Ko-fi thank-you sentences for Lux; Billy adopts Conner and it actually goes pretty good! I, uh, was only supposed to write nine sentences for this, buuuuut I didn't only write nine sentences for this. 😅 LOOK, I HIT A GROOVE, I'M NOT SORRY. Enjoy your read-more, y'all.

“Do you want some ideas for names?” Billy offers. Most kids don’t get to “legally” name themselves quite this way, so he feels like helping Superboy pick a good name is important. He wants him to have one he really likes. “I know a lot of them. Or we could look some up online? Batman got us a desktop and got you a laptop and a tablet, in case you need one for anything. Oh, and there’s phones, so we can keep in contact! I should grab you yours, actually, it’s . . . somewhere in the kitchen, I think.” 

“‘Ideas’?” Superboy repeats, looking a little uncomfortable. “Like . . . what?” 

“I just mean suggestions,” Billy promises, immediately distracted from the phone by Superboy’s apparent discomfort. The phone can wait. “You can pick any name you want, it’s up to you. I’m not gonna, like, veto you or anything.” 

“. . . sure,” Superboy says. He still looks uncomfortable and Billy still can’t be sure he really means it, but . . . well, he just has to do his best, he guesses.

“You don’t have to decide right away, you can think it over for a bit,” he says. “But we at least need something to put on the paperwork. You can always change it later if you decide you don’t like it.” 

“Whatever,” Superboy says, his mouth thinning. Billy thinks Cadmus was sort of terrible for not giving him a name. Actually, no, Cadmus was really terrible for that.

“How about I just list some, and if you like any of them, you can just say?” he suggests. 

“Whatever,” Superboy repeats, looking away. Well . . . it’s not a “no”, at least, so Billy figures they can try, and if Superboy gets annoyed, they’ll just stop and try again later. 

“Okay,” he says. “Um . . . let’s see, what are some good ones . . . David, Asher, Zachary, Parker, Otto, Levi . . . um . . .” 

Superboy’s jaw tightens. Billy stops listing names and bites his tongue. Okay. The name thing is a sore spot, maybe. Or maybe Superboy just doesn’t like any of his suggestions and thinks he’s lame, he guesses. That might also be, like . . . a thing. 

“I’ll try to think of some more later,” Billy says, repressing a guilty wince and grasping desperately for a new topic. “Do you, uh . . . have any questions? Or anything like that?” 

Probably he should’ve asked that sooner, come to think. 

"How often are you gonna be here?" Superboy asks, still looking away. Billy can’t really read what he can see of his face very well, but hopefully once they know each other better he'll get better at that kind of thing. Like, he’ll have to, right? 

"Oh, like–pretty much whenever I'm not doing hero stuff or on any League missions," he says. "I'll make sure and tell you if I'm ever gonna be gone overnight or anything like that, okay?" 

Superboy . . . blinks. Looks back at him. 

"You're going to live here?" he asks in confusion. Billy blinks too, tilting his head.

"Yeah," he says. "I mean, it wouldn't be very nice of me to just ditch you here all by yourself, would it?" 

"I can take care of myself," Superboy says, his expression shuttering. Billy frowns. 

"Well, sure, but that doesn't mean anybody's gonna make you," he says. Just because Superboy’s physically old enough to take care of himself doesn’t mean he’s not technically still a baby. He deserves to get taken care of and have somebody help him figure out, like . . . everything, pretty much. Civilian life and superhero stuff both. 

That’s why Billy’s doing this, so . . . yeah. 

“Why?” Superboy says. 

“Because that’d be really mean,” Billy says. “And we’re the good guys, so we have to be the good guys.” 

Superboy’s jaw tightens again, and then he folds his arms and looks away again too. He looks upset. Billy wishes he knew how to fix it. Like–even just a little bit. He knows sometimes that stuff just doesn’t “fix”, but . . . still. He’s trying to be a good dad here, so he feels like he should fix things like Superboy being upset. 

Well–he guesses just letting him work through being upset is okay too, if it comes to it. For when things aren’t that easy to get distracted from. Billy would also have a lot to be upset about if he’d been made in a lab and told he was supposed to be somebody he’s not and gotten mind-controlled the first time he’d ever woken up for real. Like, that’s a really shit first day. 

Superboy must feel really weird, too. Cadmus probably didn’t really teach him how to be a kid or a teenager, since they were trying to make an adult Superman, so it’s no wonder he thinks they’re gonna make him take care of himself. Billy’s gonna have to help him learn how being a kid works, he’s pretty sure. 

Well, he can do that. And, well, Superboy’s friends can cover the “teenager” stuff, he guesses. Like, probably. 

. . . maybe he could find a couple parenting books or something. A parenting book might be a good idea. 

"I just don't get it," Superboy says after a long moment staring at the wall, tensing his folded arms. "What about when you have to get back to your real life? Like your . . . your job and your house and your . . . family. This is keeping you away from all that." 

"Oh," Billy realizes, blinking at him in surprise. He guesses Superboy probably would expect him to have that kinda stuff, huh. "No, I don't really . . . have any of those, technically? I mean, I am human, I wasn't lying or anything, I just don't have a job or another house or anything like that. Actually the Justice League is paying for all of this, 'cause we were all talking about the best place for you to live and Superman asked if maybe I could take care of you, and I had to tell him I couldn't 'cause I didn't actually have anything to take care of you with, but Batman said the League could set up a stipend to pay for stuff and help me get a place and all that if I wanted to do it, sooooo . . ." 

". . . Superman asked you to take care of me?" Superboy asks hesitantly, shifting in his bean bag and finally glancing back to him again. 

"Yeah," Billy confirms with a nod, a little relieved that Superboy’s looking at him again. Well–close to him, anyway. He’s not quite making eye contact, but that’s fine. "Well, him and Batman. Because my powers are kinda close to yours so I can help you train and stuff, but also Kryptonians are vulnerable to magic so if you've got any mind control triggers in your head that we missed I should be able to stop you without having to hurt you. Like I could restrain you until we could help you or until you could snap out of it on your own, I mean." 

"Oh," Superboy says, blinking slowly. "I just figured somebody had some kryptonite somewhere in case something like that happened." 

"No," Billy says, frowning at the thought. Geez, what kind of an awful dad would he be if he did that? He's seen what kryptonite does to Superman and it totally sucks. "Kryptonite hurts. I'm not gonna let anybody use kryptonite on you. Er–well, probably eventually a bad guy will when you're on a mission, that's kind of how those go, but we're definitely not gonna keep any here.” 

"Why not?" Superboy asks, frowning back at him. "It's more efficient than actually fighting me. And I might injure you if I'm like that." 

"Yeah," Billy says. "But also somebody bad could use it against you if they ever broke in and found it. And this is, um–well. This is your home now, so I don't think there should be things that could hurt you in it anyway." 

Superboy stares blankly at him again. Billy tries not to fidget. 

"There were lots of things that could hurt me in Cadmus," Superboy says, his face staying very, very blank in a way that Billy immediately hates. 

"Well, this isn't Cadmus," Billy says firmly, trying to look as sincere and trustworthy and dad-ly as he knows how to. He had a really, really great dad. He can pay that forward. Superboy deserves a great dad too. "I'm taking care of you now, and I don't want kryptonite or anything like it around you. Ever." 

Superboy stares at him. His expression is really complicated-looking and Billy doesn't understand it, so he just keeps trying to look as dad-ly as possible. Hopefully that'll help, or at least won't hurt. 

". . . what about your family, though?" Superboy asks after a long moment, flicking his eyes away uncomfortably. Billy really hopes he's doing this right. "Or do you, uh, not have one of those either?" 

"Um," Billy says. "Well, I have the worst uncle in the world who I really hope is rotting in prison somewhere by now, but otherwise it's just you."

"What?" Superboy frowns again, looking confused. "What's just me?" 

"Uh . . . my family?" Billy replies, a little embarrassed. He hasn't actually had any family that he could still want to be around in . . . well, a really long time now, so it feels sort of weird to say it, but it is true. Dubiously-legally true, given all the fake paperwork Batman’s been putting together, but still true. 

Superboy gives him the blank stare yet again. Billy feels like a moron, but–well, he's not gonna take it back. Even if Superboy thinks he's presuming too much too quick or something, which admittedly he kinda is, Billy also can't imagine how awful it'd be hearing someone call you their family and then say they weren't really or hadn't actually meant it or just . . . whatever. 

Superboy might not even care if he did, but . . . 

Well. Billy would care. So he's not gonna.

Ever.

[deadtiredghost]

Tmnt facts that are canon cause i said so:

All Leo's are sci-fi fans of varying degrees of old sci-fi series/movies

But MM!Leo thinks the old movies are old and thus has no major franchise to obsess over, he is just big into any of the more modern movies of the genre: I'm thinking Interstellar, Blade Runner, idk many more. And then he started watching Final Space and eventually got into Futurama.

But he still would think the other Leo's are old and a bit lame for enjoying old anime so much.

All the Donnie's and Leo's are the musical fans, but that doesn't mean that Raph and Mikey can't enjoy a musical too! Especially 2003!Raph who grew up watching shit like high school musical and teen beach movie with Leo and Donnie.

The 2003 boys all teamed up to sit on Mikey and tape Mikey's mouth shut cause he would dramatically and badly sing the songs otherwise.

2018 crew are hard into Hamilton of course while 2012 have a knock off version of it that flopped but Mikey loves.

2003 have a musical version of Lost Boys and Faries that could possibly be comparable with some rap songs and some emotional ballads.

Bayverse and MM have batman while 2018 have a weird mixture of some irl media and some really obvious knock offs. 2012 has Wingnut and Silber sentry as comics to replace Marvel and DC in their universe and we all know how 2003 is on superheroes.

All the Mikey's are naturally talented at drawing apart from 2012 who's skills apparently just got transferred to literally every single one of his siblings.

2012!Mikey's writing looks like chickenscratch and his drawings are chaotic in an abstract art kinda way, while 12!Leo can draw anime, 12!Karai is decent at drawing anything reallt, 12!Donnie preffers skatching items and backgrounds rather than people and 12!Raph is the one who does art the most in the fam.

The 1987 turtles are stuck in 1987 and have been since 1987. They like crossovers for the change of pace but 87!Raph and 87!Donnie very much dislike how other turtles have treated them in the past so take any and ever chance to fuck with their alternates in retaliation, feigning innocence well enough that they keep getting away with blatantly insulting their iterations to their face.

Leo is the tea drinker in the family across iterations but most of the iterations don't drink coffee - rottmnt gets into coffee wars (sans Leo and Splinter) but other than that 2007!Donnie and Bayverse!Raph are the only rabid coffee drinkers.

most of the Donnies drink energy drinks if they want a caffeine boost - the nonbinaries and their Monster especially.

The MM kids aren't allowed coffee because Splinter read a watched of child-raising YouTube videos and banned it. Of course that doesn't stop them from sneaking out. MM!Donnie is trying to convince him to allow coffee while MM!Raph just sneaks in his energy drinks.

2003!Casey was convinced the turtles were adults for at LEAST the first month into their friendship.

The ampunt Mikey wears stickers is directly proportional to the amount of leeway Splinter gives him - with the used-to-be-human Splinters being more strict on not personalising his weapon while the used-to-be-rat Splinters such as MM gives the go ahead.

The outlines of this rule are 03!Splinter and 18!Splinter of course who have entirely different ways of handling their adhd child.

And then there is bayverse!Splinter who said fuck the stickers, yes of course my 15-year-old children can have tattoos.

(And yes I firmly believe they were 15 in the first movie, and I attribute their tattoos to Splinter not really seeing the harm in it, or caring much as long as it won't hurt them.)

18!Leo is biologically the eldest but no one knows this apart from Draxum who will never tell at this point. Splinter aged them based on size.

On the other hand, 03!Leo is the biological youngest but only Donnie knows this (science shit to find it out) and will never tell anyone because he found out that 03!Mikey hatched first and that information can never be allowed to get to the turtle in question.

2012 Casey is transfem but doesn't know it yet and 2018 Casey is what 12!Casey will look like at 20.

All Donnie's watch anime and all Mikey's watch horror movies - despite how much they may or may not scream at the horror movies.

07!Mikey sells art online and 07!Leo becomes a language tutor in their 20's. Ironic as 12!Raph attempts to sell art online but becomes too emotionally attached to his work and 12!Donnie attempts to tutor for a time but is a terrible teacher.

Leo is a basketball or baseball fan, Raph likes wrestling and basketball, Donnie will partake in basketball or volleyball and Mikey prefers dancing but is open to playing anything... just not watching.

Splinter always watched the tennis, becuase his grandmother did. Leo likes to put it on but doesn't like playing it.

Mikey will forever be confused why the others enjoy watching sport. This stemms from when he was 12 and trying to watch his cartoons and Splinter would always take control of the TV during the Olympics. Mikey is still very salty and has an agenda against the Olympics and any other big sports match on their communal TV.

All the Leo's before 2012 just didnt use the Internet or any electronics as a kid and thus struggles with electronics massively.

Conversely 2012 and 2018 Leo were both on tumblr as kids and read fanfic about Space Heros and Jupiter Jim respectively.

And in addition: Donnie was on the Internet far too much as a kid.

(12!Donnie will never tell but 12!Mikey befriending Chris Bradford on Facebook hit a bit too close to home.)

After Don, Raph is the best at mechanics, other than 18!Raph who is kinda shit at them.

Splinter taught all of the turtles first aid but Raph and Mikey are patched up the most by the other two, which leads to the other two being more confident and skilled at first aid.

Leo's first aid experience is very much similar to an army medic, using improvisation based on his prior knowledge without any of the proper hospital procedure while Donnie's is much more based on his research into medicine and thus much more clinical.

The outliers are the 18!kids cause Donnie finds biological shit kinda disgusting unless he HAS to do it.

And then there is the 87!turtles who don't really get hurt for longer than an episode's run time. Despite this every single one of them are able to accurately and skillfully carry out any medical procedure should the need arise becuase cartoon logic and convenience. It is a skill they have and its usually 87!Donnie ordering them about while 87!Raph plays nurse.

Mikey and Raph spray paint together sometimes in all iterations other than 87.

87!Mikey and 87!Leo have never kmowingly committed a crime.

Mikey looks up to Leo most out of his siblings, and Leo would look up to Mikey in turn if he could get over the jealousy towards his youngest brother.

There is not a single itteration where Leo doesn't sometimes kinda wish he could be more like Mikey - he has never voiced these feelings and hates that he feels this jealousy.

If you wake Leo up from sleeping he will be alert, a bit grumpy about it, but will never turn you away. He rarely gets a full good night's sleep anyways, ans becuase of this he is prime target to bother when he is awake... up until they turn 14 where Leo gets into the habit of pretending to be asleep so Mikey doesn't bother him and starts meditating until he falls asleep.

The prior headcannon excludes rottmnt and mutant mayhem.

Mikey starts bothering Donnie more and joins him in the lab late at night a lot.

If you dare to disturb Raph's beauty sleep you will get a pillow to the face and a shouting to at the least.

Everyone of the turtles loves Kung Fu Panda or whatever similar movie exists in their world. They won't admit it but its because Poe reminds them of Mikey.

Raph maintains that he doesn't like physical contact much to get out of hugging the sweaty humans in his life. He is actually fairly chill with hugs he just hates the feeling of sweat on his scales so much, and learnt that the hard way when Casey brought him in for a hug after a fight and he shoved him off and blustered a bit. But any of his siblings hugging him is fine, he only ever shoves them off out of annoyance.

Donnie is the least huggy turtle, but he will sometimes lean his full body weight on April - which is fine in most iterations but some cannot handle the weight, I'm looking at Bayverse.

If Mikey were a human he would be a borderline nudist when home and everyone who lived with him would complain about it.

Like [insert hair covering here] and a fluffy dressing gown from when he was 9 wrapped around the waist if you're lucky.

[ohbabydollie]

Since it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow… can we please get some mushy Schlatt! You can write about anything! Maybe make them a few blurbs… I just want cute and mushy senecios with Schlatt. And happy Valentine’s Day!

happy valentine’s day nonnie!!

he helps you out if you need to make those elementary school goodie bags for a niece/nephew/sibling, etc.

he’s helping you put everything in, make sure it looks nice, decorate the outside with the names, etc.

he helped you with shopping too, driving you to target and paying for everything himself

he refuses to get any of the lame stuff like school supplies so most of it is little toys and sugar filled treats because in his words “we’re not the ones that have to deal with it, so why is it a problem?” and “let the kids enjoy the holiday”

if you need to drop off snacks for the party at school he will offer to do it

you’ll give him the snacks and in the few seconds of looking at them he’ll decide to stop by the store and get some more treats to drop off

your sibling/niece/nephew is excited when he shows up with a bunch of snacks and kids are cheering since they get to have something besides the veggie trays and pretzels some of the parents

your kid made a valentine’s day card for him with a drawing of the three of you inside that is now stuck to his fridge

onto how he spends the 14th with you

goes the full way for valentine’s day, waking up earlier than normal to make you breakfast as best as he can, he cleans up the mess so you won’t have to deal with it

takes you shopping for a few hours, buying you whatever you could want, from clothes to perfumes

he absolutely insists on spoiling you rotten, not giving you a limit on spending

after you finish shopping he’ll take you home before having a quickie then drawing you a bath before leaving you to get ready for dinner

once you’re ready, he is in absolute awe at how you look, not wanting to wait until after dinner to fuck you but he waits it out with a hard on during dinner

afterwards you two get home and he couldn’t hold himself back anymore and is making out with you as you go up the driveway and try to open the door

[gemini-sensei]

omfg i’m squealing at your response to shy goth larusso in a bikini!! your writing is so delicious, i totally haven’t stalked your page the last few days <3

when the boys come back, they all look visibly flustered, their hair being disheveled and faces flushed. they see reader in the pool, as she finally gained the confidence to get in with sam and the girls. she’s splashing around and dancing with the loud music some kid put on the speaker. her laugh was music to the boys ears, not used to hearing it from the quiet girl. they swore she was an angel, all of them wishing she was laughing at their joke, dancing with them instead of whatever meathead was next to sam.

but her happiness soon depleted as soon as she saw kyler show up with his goons. she started to feel worried, knowing kyler would laugh at her bikini or make some tasteless jokes. she tells sam she has a headache and is gonna go lay down. reader grabs her things in a hurry, trying to avoid stares of her stomach and ass.

she runs into the cool, large house and darts to her room. she figures a shower will help her calm down, but the image of her rubenesque body in the mirror makes her tear up. she could never get the attention of the trio of boys currently drinking by the edge of the pool. of course she had a crush on them too; demetri’s nerdiness and sarcasm made her smile, hawk’s flashy style and bad boy attitude made her swoon, and robby’s handsome face and wittiness made her weak in the knees.

she finishes her shower and puts on a baggy shirt and shorts and sits on her bed. just then she hears a knock on the door. to her surprise, it was just the boys she was thinking about.

After she leaves the party, the trio knows that it's not because of a headache. It's because of Kyler and his gang of losers who were not invited to the pool party. They aren't shy to confront him about it either, knowing Sam wouldn't like him to be there either. Kyler wants to fight over it but Hawk reminds him that they're outnumbered anyway, so they should just tuck tail and leave while they can with their dignity intact. After a while, they're walking out saying that the party is lame anyway and no one else has to worry about them.

However, for Robby, Hawk, and Demetri, the party isn't as fun without Reader there. So they opt to go check on her. With all the loud music and everyone enjoying themselves, no one really notices them disappearing into the house again. This time, they make their way upstairs to Reader's room to check on her. Robby is the one to knock on her door.

When she opened it, she's shocked to find the trio there, as if she'd somehow managed to summon them with her thoughts. She's a little startled by their presence at her door and looked down, trying to make her the heat in her cheeks go away. "What are you guys doing here...?"

"We wanted to check on you," Robby tells her. His voice is soft and assuring.

Hawk adds, "We made Kyler and his dumb friends leave. No one wanted them here anyway, so if you want, you can come back downstairs."

"I don't really want to..." she tells them, still unable to look at them. She can't believe her crushes are standing at the door of her bedroom.

Demetri nods. "That's okay. You don't have to if you don't want to."

"Yeah," Robby agrees. "Like I said, we just wanted to make sure you're okay."

"I'm fine..." she tells them, but really her mind is making her worry over what they thought of her in that bikini. She can't imagine it was anything nice, but she feels a little more comfortable in her baggy shirt, though not really her shorts. They show off her thick thighs and how they press together when she stands or sits. She tries to pull her shirt down to cover them, hoping the guys won't notice.

But they do notice. In fact, they've been stealing looks at her legs the whole time they've been standing there. They can't help it. She smells fresh like flowery body wash and shampoo, her pretty thighs on display. Demetri's heart is pounding as he thinks about squeezing them and watching the fat spill from between his fingers. All Hawk can think about are her tits under her shirt, which he can tell she's wearing without a bra because her nipples are hard under it. And Robby is wishing he could uncover her belly from hiding under that baggy shirt because she's beautiful.

"Well, uh, we weren't really planning on going back to the party," Hawk admits, earning him a hard nudged from Demetri behind him.

"Oh really?" she asks softly, finally looking up at him. She wears a cute pout that all of them have to hold back from reacting to because she's so fucking cute. She's so naturally gorgeous, they almost can't stand it. "Why?"

Robby shrugs. "We're all kind of tired of it."

"Low social batteries, if you will," Demetri adds.

She nods. "I understand."

Admittedly, it's a little awkward, but Hawk doesn't like any silence sit in the air for long.

"We could watch a movie or something," he suggests.

"I think Anthony's using the TV downstairs as a coverup to spy on girls outside... but we could use mine..." Reader shyly says and opens her door a little more, inviting them inside.

None of them had really gotten in the pool despite it being a pool party. Only Hawk had jumped in once to splash a bunch of people, but that was a while ago, so he was mostly dry. So, to say less, they weren't tracking water into her room when they walked inside. Nevertheless, Hawk does have a towel and uses it to protect her floor when he sits down.

They don't want to invite themselves to sit on her bed, even though it's a nice big bed that they could all sit on. They set up a movie and only after getting cozy on her bed does she shyly ask if they're comfortable on the floor, then offers the spots around her for them to come sit. They don't hesitate.

She's between Hawk and Robby while Demetri is on his stomach at the end of the bed. It's a dream come true for her, and she thinks that if she's dreaming then she never wants to wake up again. It's heaven just to be so close to them.

Nothing happens until a little ways into the movie. Hawk, bold as he is, of course, put his hand on Reader's thigh. It isn't long after that Robby puts his arm around her shoulders. The dream continues and she's sure she's going to wake up at any moment to Sam wanting her to put on a bikini and go to her pool party. But she doesn't wake up and realizes she's really in the middle of all this. She can't imagine what they do next.

As Hawk slides his hand along her thigh, he whispers in her ear, "Is this okay?"

She nods, too excited for words. She doesn't even know what to say, too scared that if she speaks, she'll somehow ruin it.

His hand pushes between her thighs and she slightly moves them apart, allowing him room to slot his hand there and squeeze her thigh. She lets out a squeak of surprise, unprepared for that. He chuckles in her ear as Robby holds in his laugh. The noise alerts Demetri to the goings on behind him and he shifts so he can watch them, forgetting about the movie.

Next, Robby slips his hand up her shirt and puts it on her waist. He asks, "Is this okay?"

She nods again and he smirks at her, letting his hand slide up her body until he's cupping her naked tit in his hand and gently fondling it. She bites her lip and holds back a soft moan, to which Demetri finally speaks up.

"We wanna hear you, beautiful," he tells her.

She's so flustered by the nickname and their attention. She lets go of her lip and lets out a noise that embarrasses her. She can only turn her head and hide her face in Hawk's neck, unsure if she even sounds nice to them. She doesn't think so, but Hawk pulls away from her and makes her look up at him as he toys with her thighs and the waistband of her shorts.

"Don't be embarrassed, gorgeous," he tells her. "Like he said, we want to hear you. All your sexy little noises."

Robby only nods in agreement as he continues to play with her tit.

She's practically falling apart in their hands under Demetri's eye. She doesn't know what to do or say but she likes their attention. These simple little touches are more than she could have ever wished for, so she's more than satisfied with them. She has no idea what she's in for...

[vivlily]

It is once more fox girl friday, but along with that it's also friday the 13th. So happy fox girl friday and...

BOOOO!

sorry that was pretty scary, but you know whats scarier? A story I heard about a merchant and his son stopping at a village. But this story might be toooo scary for a scared little fox like you, so I'll be nice just this once and hide it below.

I might misremember it since i heard it from like a youth pastor way back when (it's been a long time).

so like get this, this merchant and his son stopped by an otherwise unremarkable town to do like merchant stuff or whatever. And like eventually he got to selling some of his wares, but everyone kept avoiding one of his wares in particular. Can you guess what it was?

That's right, it was his apples, so he asked some of the villagers what was up.

"Is there anything about my apples that bothers you all?"

upon mention of apples, the villagers went stiff, fear enveloping their face's.

"Sir, t-t-t-heir marvelous apples sir. I-i-it's just that there lives an awful "plague god", in that manor across the lake."

"that vile creature... in it's infinite jealousy, ended up cursing those that ingest an apple."

The villagers went on to explain various tragedies that affected those unfortunate enough to eat one. And mentioning that the vile plague god takes the form of a young girl. And that if ever you notice a young girl on that isle, it's already to late for you. The plague god has already noticed you, prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

But the merchant merely laughed and said

"Very well, I suppose I should enjoy my marvelous apples myself! WEHHEHHEH" (He had a really odd laugh, runs in the family I believe)

He had a bite.

Not long after he went looking for his son so that they could have a meal. Only to realize his son was missing, so off in a hurry he went to look for him. Asking as many people as he could.

Eventually a villager said that they saw a boat go out not long ago, towards that vile little plague god's domain.

He wasted no time and desperately paddled his way over to that cursed isle. Much to his relief his son was within sight, yet something was odd.

His son, one to only ever draw anything in the comfort of their own carriage was sat on the ground drawing the mansion. Relieved he gave his son a warm hug, and told him how dangerous it was here.

They had a moment, before the son asked if he could draw one more thing before they left the isle. The dad was worried, but he happened to be a softie when it came to his son, so he relented.

As the son finished drawing, he waved towards the manor, his father become confused, and very worried. The merchant was fearing that the vile plague god was in there. But he turned around and cast his gaze towards the mansions window, and saw nothing but the curtains.

Fearing his son was seeing things he said we leave now, and leave they did.

On their way back towards the town, the son proudly showed off various drawing's to his father. Explaining each and every one of them, and the son's final piece depicted a crying girl.

The father obviously confused mentioned "what brought this one on?"

"ooooo that was the girl in the window earlier"

The dad had never seen any girl, fear gripped his heart, and he decided that they leave immediately. And so leave they did, the dad swore never to return again, and to never have another marvelous apple again.

Heh, it's not really as scary as I remember if i'm being honest, it's the usual classic "ghost girl only the kid sees" kinda thing, a teensy bit boring tbh.

Honestly the only reason it stuck with me was because I kept wondering just why the ghost girl was crying? Well it's probably just adding the crying ghost trope for the sake of adding a trope, kinda lame imo.

Well that's that, have a marvelous fox girl friday!

[foreos]

the bad kids rated by how much they would like sonic the hedgehog

a sequel to my hatchetfield version

- riz gukgak: 1/10 i don’t think riz even touches video games. i can’t imagine riz having any strong media interests because his life is so busy all the time so i doubt he would think about sonic the hedgehog at all. if he ever played a sonic game though i think he’d be like unnaturally good at it because he’s got great reaction times and it’s not hard for him to intuit what the best routes are. he’d probably only play in like a social situation though.

- kristen applebees: 10/10 kristen grew up playing sonic games with her brothers and she likes them. sonic is very very good for adhd brains and i think she likes running around really really fast. fucking AWFUL at the games though she has a dexterity score of four. she has never passed a quicktime prompt in her life but that does not stop her from booting up the games and playing the first three or so levels. doesn’t really engage with the media past the games but that’s just because if she had a comic book she’d lose it and while she watched some of the cartoons as a kid, it’s been a long time. probably hasn’t played in years.

- adaine abernant: 10/10 she did not know what sonic was until freshman year and at first she did not see the appeal. she’s never been allowed plain and stupid fun in her entire life and when confronted with it she’s just like…why? but i think as time passes i could actually see adaine really fucking enjoying it if she decided to suspend her disbelief and embrace it. i think in another timeline adaine is much geekier but much like the other bad kids she currently does not have time for that. there’s an alternate universe where adaine is a comic book nerd with sonic opinions but i don’t think any of us are ready for that. there’s probably other franchises she would possibly like better but i think she could get really into it.

- gorgug thistlespring: 0/10 video games frustrate him. his fingers are too big for the buttons and sonic moves way too fast. like kristen he cannot get past the first few levels and so he and sonic don’t really see eye to eye. he wouldn’t say he hates the guy or has anything against the franchise but he would probably rather do, like, anything else.

- fig faeth: 10000/10 i think fig would like it. while it does not match her aesthetic i think she definitely grew up with sonic games as a kid and is pretty good at them. definitely had to beat video game levels for gilear growing up. as i said earlier with kristen, sonic is very good for adhd brain and i think she likes to build as much speed as she can, plus sonic music is fucking dope and i think fig is a fan of stupid fun. sometimes fig finds herself wishing that he would go even faster, though.

- fabian seacaster: -100000/10 he’s scared of rodents and obsessed with being cool fabian does not like sonic. yes, i know sonic is not a rodent but like. fabian does not care that is a walking talking blue rat with one weird eyeball that has two pupils and he is wearing NO clothes. plus, sonic is considered deeply lame by the general public, especially high schoolers, so fabian would not be caught dead in even the same room where sonic-related activities are occurring. fabian goes out of his way to avoid any and all sonic media, which is a shame because when fabian was a kid bill seacaster impulsively bought Every Video Game so there’s probably a completed sonic collection somewhere in fabian’s house. like i think fabian owns sonic chronicles and tails’s sky patrol and sonic labyrinth and he has no idea. in another life fabian is a shadow fan.

BONUS:

- ragh barkrock: 1/10, like gorgug and riz he’s just not really a video game guy.

- ayda aguefort: 1000000000/10 she would fucking love it. she would love it so so so much. much like adaine i think ayda would be extremely geeky in another, less stressful life and i think if fig introduced her to it she would be all fucking in. comics tv shows video games, all of it. i think ayda would eat that shit up.

- cassandra: 10/10 blaze reminds her of kalina and she thinks it’s fun and i am desperate for cassandra to have fun.

- aelwyn: 0/10 absolutely not. she agrees with fabian that sonic is creepy and should wear clothes. she tries not to think about it, ever.

[thewritingmagician2022]

Hiiii hewwo :3 do u mind writing how the brothers would act with an MC that's just 8 years old? Idk if you do platonic scenarios, but if u do it'd be very cool🩷

I can definitely do platonic requests! I will admit that I’m not particularly well-versed in children as an only child and no friends with kids but I hope my experiences with Luke allow me to do this justice! Thank you for your patience as well; I’ve been busy with a flare up and then a ton of appointments.

Lucifer: As much as Lucifer doesn’t want to admit it, he’s definitely mastered the father figure sort of role for his family since coming to the Devildom. He’s taken a step beyond just the oldest brother and typically leaves that more to Mammon. Which means when Diavolo chooses a literal child as the RAD exchange student (soemthing Lucifer is gonna fight with him about later because what sort of idiotic choice is that?), Lucifer is immediately stepeing into the role of parental figure. Now, he’s not very affectionate and he does hold you to super high standards as he tries to imprint on you and mold you into the most perfectly well-behaved and studious little human possible but…he’s also hopelessly wrapped around your little finger. You teeter on the edge of being spoiled and Lucifer is far more attached to you than he would ever admit and he is petrified of the idea of something happening to you under his watch for more than just professional reasons.

Mammon: Mammon has immaculate tsundere older bother vibes. He’s not happy at all when he’s put in charge of a little kid and he can’t help but wonder if it’s a joke for them to make the exchange student a child so he doesn’t take the job super seriously at first, regularly pawning you off onto other people. However, once things start getting serious, Mammon becomes your biggest champion. He’s going to tease you like crazy and prank you but he’s not going to let alone else ever bother you. If someone so much as pushes against you too hard in the hallways at RAD, Mammon knows and that demon who did it is going to have several angry brothers to answer to. Mammon will also lowkey let you hang out in his room when you’re homesick and he spends an exorbitant amount of Lucifer’s money to spoil you because he can’t stand seeing you sad or wanting for anything.

Levi: Shockingly, Levi does well with kids, as evidenced by his interactions with Luke. Maybe it’s because they’re easily taken in by his interests and tend to see his video game prowess as something cool rather than something nerdy or lame. Whatever it is, children tend to have a good time with Levi and you’re no exception. He loves to play games and watch shows with you; he takes on the role of mentor basically with this studd and loves teaching you all the details which you soak up because little kids are so good at hyperfixating. He makes sure to only show you age appropriate stuff and you’re definitely wandering around the HoL with a Switch and Pokemon or Animal Crossing, always trying to show your stuff to the other brothers who listen to you with more patience than they’ve ever shown Levi. Levi is very much like the best-friend kind of brother where you trust him and end up telling him everything because you couldn’t possibly be embarrassed or nervous in front of Levi.

Satan: Satan is the antagonistic older brother figure. He takes great joy in riling you and Luke up by insulting you or teasing you, though it’s never overly serious and he enjoys it almost as much when you return the energy. Expect small prank wars with Satan and he will happily team up with you to go against the other brothers, especially Lucifer who he tries to turn you against. He doesn’t need to be your faovrite brother necessarily but he feels great joy in knowing you like him and respect him, especially if you ever choose him over Lucifer or another for something. It’s one of the reasons he enjoys teaching you things and helping you with RAD coursework so much. There’s something satisfying about having you listen to him and look up to him, particularly when you’re gushing about how smart he is and how good a teacher he is. Satan also teams up wth you to secure a pet (a cat obviously) for the HoL, advocating for how it’ll teach you responsibility or something. In his softer moments, Satan is happy to read to you, particularly mysteries, and he enjoys watching you try to solve everything before the end.

Asmo: Asmo is immediately smitten with this adorable human child that’s come to the Devildom. He just thinks you’re the cutest little thing and is going to turn you into his own living doll. Be prepared to be dressed up and showed off. He’s gonna take you everywhere with him, his own little shadow (which thrills you of course because who doesn’t wanna be Asmo’s favorite little pet?) and some times the other brother’s have to stop him and remind him that ‘no, MC is literally a child and cannot go to the club with you’. Asmo may not be the most practical big brother vibe, in fact he’s more like an older sister vibe, where he shares all the gossip of the Devildom with you while you sit with your face masks on, painting each other’s nails in his room, and an episode of the trashiest reality shows plays in the background. He’s teaching you so much about self-love and confidence and charm, and you’re going to go back the human realm such a secure, confident little individual under his tutelage.

Beel: Beel is nervous around you because you’re just…so small. So easily breakable. So innocent. It reminds him a bit of Lilith, which hits him pretty hard at first, and he doesn’t really want to get close to you because he doesn’t know if he can take another loss like that. It means he spends a lot of time in the beginning just watching over you from afar and if he sees someone at RAD so much as shove past you too roughly, he’s going to deal with them after school and you’ll never have that problem again - only you won’t know why because he keeps it a secret. Against his own will, Beel becomes more and more attached to you to the point where he enjoys having you at his practices and games to cheer him on and likes sharing warm milk and dessert with you before bed and he’s carrying you around half the time because you know that if you run and jump at him, he’ll catch you no matter what he’s doing or what he has to drop to do it. Beel is like the older brother that you admire and just sort of trail around behind like a little puppy, and you live for when he ruffles your hair or shares his ice cream with you.

Belphie: Belphie is used to being the baby of the family (aside from Lilith and he doesn’t want to go there, even in his own head) so it’s definitely an adjustment to get used to having a young newcomer around the house, getting all of his brother’s attention and affection. I won’t talk about pre-murder Belphie because Belphie killing an actual child as an act of revenge is taking it maybe a teeny tiny step too far. I imagine he doesn’t want to like you and is super short/disinterested at first, unless he’s bothering you in some way and he can definitely be more bitchy than his other siblings. But you grow on him, sort of like a fungus, as you chatter at him even while he doens’t answer and follow him around and do little tasks for him in hopes that he’ll start to like you. Eventually, you reach a point where Belphie is the person you go to for some peace and quiet in this crazy house. He’ll let you nap in his room and point out the constellations in the planetarium and he watches over your dreams to make sure you don’t have any nightmares. He’s definitely a secretly soft brother vibe.

Diavolo: Diavolo is like a proud soccer mom from the very beginning. He chose you because was so taken in by this adorable little human and that grows every day you’re in the Devildom. You may be little but you are fierce; it’s incredible watching a child essentially take over and captivate an entire realm to the point where they have a legion of the greatest demons catering to their every beck and call. Honestly, Diavolo couldn’t be prouder of you and he doesn’t care at all that he may be spoiling you and granting you a few too many freedoms. He celebrates your every accomplishment as if it’s monumental and he bends over backwards to make the Devildom a place where you feel safe and comfortable while you visit. You essentially become both his surrogate kid and the Devildom mascot in his eyes.

Barbatos: Barbatos, much like Lucifer, really doesn’t understand Diavolo’s decision to have a child as the exchange student. It sounds like asking for trouble and chaos, which is exactly what they don’t need during this very important time while they try to foster a relationship between the three realms. Barbatos trusts Diavolo though and so he accepts your appearance with his usual grace. He is very slow to warm up - he doesn’t interact with children much so he’s a little awkward and can sometimes be a little cold but he is looking out for you in his own ways. Over time, he grows closer and closer to you, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t understand why everyone loved you so much. Barbatos enjoys making you your favorite meals from home and teaching you about the flora and animal life in the Devildom, since those are things that interest you much more than the politics or such. Your innocence is very sweet to him and it makes him quite protective; he’s a silent force in the background making sure you’re safe.

Solomon: Solomon is the definition of the fun, crazy uncle. He loves the idea of the exchange student being a child; if the demons wanted a good representation of humanity, this is the most raw and unfiltered version of it that they could possibly find. He knows they don’t have any inkling of how much chaos you’re going to cause by being there, even if you’re a good child. Your curiosity and imagination and oversaturated feelings about things keep everyone on their toes and they’re learning from you just as much as you learn from them. Solomon becomes a little bit like family to you as the only other human available and you adore him, constantly gushing about how you wanna grow up and be a cool sorcerer like him. Solomon thrives under the attention and, to keep his cool points up, constantly whisks you away on all sorts of adventures and shows you all kinds of spells (most of which are not appropriate for children, Solomon, damn it).

Simeon: Simeon treats you like his own kid and he’s basically raising you and Luke as siblings. He’s got such single dad energy. He’s working hard as an exchange student at RAD and trying to keep the peace between the Devildom and the Celestial realm but he’s also gotta chase after you and Luke as you run amok through the kingdom. You two never give him a moments rest to be honest. For the most part, Simeon is a responsible guardian who keeps you both safe and is endlessly patient/kind, even when you two are being horribly naughty or causing problems. However, as a single dad, Simeon sometimes falls in that childlike mentality with you both and he will happily join in the prank wars or use you two as manipulation against the others, sort of like guys using babies to pick up women in the park. He can also tease you both a pretty significant amount because he believes in self-sufficiency and you won’t learn that if he babies you the whole time. Overall, he’s a 10/10 parent and the most suited to taking care of a child in the Devildom.

[samiswifey]

Back To You: Part Three

Parings: Sam Carpenter x Fem!Reader

Warnings: none

Summary: being official with Sam is great but you guys can't seem to find a moment alone together.

Part one | Part two |

It had only been a few months since you both decided to become official girlfriends but you guys were happy. You loved having Sam back in your life. And Sam loved having you back in her life. Things were great for you guys and it was true that you guys were in the honeymoon phase of your relationship because things were just so amazing right now. You both were very happy. However there were things you both were not happy about.

"Y/N come to the movies with us!" Tara says.

"Yeah, we can make a day out of it." Mindy says.

"It'll be so much fun." Chad adds.

Now you absolutely loved the kids, however you did wish that you and Sam could have some alone time together without them interrupting all the time. It was becoming too much.

"Can we maybe to this another time?" Sam asked softly. "We sort of have a date planned for today," she added.

The glare Tara gave was one you haven't seen since she was a child. It was the glare she gave when she wasn't getting her way and was very close to throwing a fit. So, you decided to step in and make a compromise. "How about we do the movie now and then Sam and I can do our date later tonight." You said. "How does that sound?"

Sam absolutely hated that idea. She hated how she had to split her time with you and practically share you with her friends. However, she was never going to say anything because she didn't want Tara mad at her again. She just got her back and she really didn't want to lose her again. So, like always, she kept her mouth shut and plastered on a smile. Hopefully this goes well.

Sitting in the passenger seat Sam was looking out the window as she tried ignoring the feelings of annoyance she had. She loves her friends. She really does, but sometimes she just wants to spend time with you alone. It's been three weeks and the only alone time you two have had was when you went to bed together. Otherwise the majority of the day was spent hanging out with them. Maybe she's being selfish because you are their friend and they should be able to hang out with you as much as she does. However you're her girlfriend and she deserves to spend the day with you without them tagging along. She's not asking for too much.

You and Sam held hands as you walked into the theater and over to the concession stand where you got everyone their favorite snacks. Sam only got a drink and some gummy worms because truth be told she didn't actually want to be here. She would have much be able to spend the day with you, alone together. Unfortunately she can't always get what she wants.

Looking over at Sam you could tell that she wasn't happy to be here. You knew that she would have much rather spend the day alone with you instead of being here with your friends. However you also knew that she wanted to avoid Tara's anger as much as she could, so she gave in to the idea of going to the movies together. Walking over you gave Sam a kiss on the cheek and smiled at her. "Thank you for doing this. I really appreciate it." You told her. Sam smiled at that and kissed you softly before opting to hold your hand. "Don't mention it."

Halfway through the movie Sam was absolutely bored out of her mind. She hated this movie and found it to be extremely lame and definitely not in her realm of movies that she enjoyed. It didn't hold her attention the way it did everyone else's, so she knew she wouldn't be able to talk about it because there was nothing interesting enough for her to talk about. She really didn't like this movie.

"That movie was so awesome!" Tara said as everyone left the theater.

The small group agreed, with the exception of Sam who just stood there as they talked. Again she hated it. She didn't like the movie and it felt like a cheap cash grab to her and it didn't feel like it was made with for the original. It just really pales in comparison to the original for her.

"Sam what did you think of the movie?" You asked.

Sam sighed as she puts her hands on her pockets. "I didn't really like it." She said honestly. Tara scoffs and rolls her eyes as she crossed her arms. "Of course you did. But I bet if Y/N picked it instead of me you would have loved it." She hissed. Sam steps back as she looks at Tara. "That's actually not true. No matter who picked it I still wouldn't have liked it because it's not something I'm really into." She said. "It has nothing to do with you."

Leaving the theater Tara still wasn't talking to Sam and it was starting to bother the older Carpenter. She felt bad for saying that she didn't like the movie, but she couldn't lie to Tara. However with her getting the cold shoulder maybe it would have been better if she had lied. Maybe then Tara wouldn't be so mad at her right now.

"Y/N would you like to get something to eat with us?" Mindy asked.

You smiled but shook your head. "I can't. I actually already have plans with Sam. We're heading to dinner at the restaurant that just opened up." You said. Tara looks at you and smiled at that. "Then maybe we can join you. It's in the same area we were heading so why don't we all have dinner together." She said. Sam shakes her head at that. "Tara, we joined you for your movie day now it's time for our date. Alone." She said. Tara glares at her. "Sam you can't just keep Y/N all to yourself! She's our friend too and we deserve to spend time with her as well." She snaps.

"Well she's my girlfriend and I would really love to have one date with just her without you guys hanging around." Sam blurted out.

Tara frowned with her eyebrow furrowed as she looks at her sister. "Say what you really mean Sam. Say that you hate having to share Y/N with us because you want to be the only person she spends time with." She sneers. Sam shakes her head as she tries to gather her words. "That's not it at all - but I would like to spend time alone, on out date, without you guys tagging along all the time," she sighed. "I love that you guys love Y/N, but there are times when we would like to spend time just the two of us." She said softly. "This doesn't mean I hate sharing her."

With Tara storming off and the twin chasing after her it was just you and Sam. You could tell that she felt bad for how mad Tara was so you decided to comfort her. "Sam don't beat yourself up over this. We'll figure out a way to split our time with them and still make time for us." You said. "We'll figure it out baby."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the weeks passed by Tara became more forceful with her demands to hang out. You were dragged to movies, dinners and concerts that you couldn't really get out of because they were paid for in advance. It was becoming an ongoing cycle that left you and Sam with barely any time together. Even when you two had plans together Tara found a way to wiggle herself in and go with you guys.

Tara knew what she was doing and she really didn't care how Sam was feeling because you were her friend as well and she didn't think it was wrong to hang out with a friend. She in harsher words didn't care how Sam felt. Sam didn't own you and Tara felt like Sam should get over it and learn that the world doesn't revolve around her. She was going to have to learn how to share you.

Sitting alone Sam thought of ways to approach this situation with Tara. She knew she had to be very careful with her words and not get Tara worked up and think that she was trying to ruin their friendship. That was the last thing Sam wanted. She didn't really understand why Tara was taking this as far as she was, why she was clinging to you and making you hang out with her. She couldn't understand but she wanted to. She wanted to know why Tara was doing all of this.

Bouncing her leg up and down Sam waited impatiently for Tara to come in from school so that she could talk to her. She was really hoping to get to the bottom of why Tara was clinging on to you so much. She just wants to understand her sister better. Hearing the door opening Sam sat up quickly and tried to relax herself before talking to her sister.

"Tara can we talk please?"

The sound of her sister's voice had Tara rolling her eyes. "What Sam? What could you possibly need to talk to me about?" She asked harshly. Sam stands up straight as she looks at her sister. "I wanted to talk about Y/N. I want to know why you want to hang out with her all the time." She says. Tara crossed her arms and avoided Sam's eyes. "I'm scared that one day she's just going to be gone... I mean you left me and I never saw you or her again, and it scares me that it might happen again. I don't think I'll survive if it will happen again." She confessed truthfully. Sam felt bad and immediately pulled her sister in for a hug. "Tara I am never leaving you and I know Y/N isn't leaving again so you have nothing to worry about." She said. "We're here to stay."

Hearing Sam say that made Tara feel guilty for forcing her way into their relationship and forcing you to spend time with her. She let her paranoia take over. "I'm really sorry for how I've been acting recently. I didn't mean to hurt you I was just scared of losing someone else I'm close with. I'm really sorry Sam." She said softly. Sam smiled softly as she hugs her sister tightly. "It's ok Tara." She said gently. "It's ok."

Arriving at the apartment you didn't know what today would bring you. You didn't know what plans were in store for you but you did secretly hope for alone time with your girlfriend because you had some news that you wanted to share with her. You didn't know how she would react to this news but you were hoping she'd be ok with it.

"Baby I'm so glad you're here." Sam said when she opens the door.

You smiled at her "me too. I also wanted to talk to you about something." You said. Sam gently grabs your hand and sits you both in the kitchen away from the group that was studying in the living room. "What's up baby? Is everything ok?" She asked. You nodded and held her hands. "Yeah everything is good," you took a deep breath. "My job offered me a spot as one of the leads in their new business. They want to move me to New Jersey." You said.

"I know this is a lot but I can always come back weekends and spend time with you. We'll talk when I'm off work and in the morning. We won't lose contact Sam," you added quickly.

Sam looks at you as she tries processing what you just told her. "This is a lot for me to take in but I'm willing to try." She said. You smiled "I'm really happy you said that. I would have turned it down if you said no." You said. "Why? Why would you do that?" Sam asked. You blushed, "because I love you Sam and I really want to be with you. If you asked me to stay I would have stayed." You said. Sam couldn't help but smile at that. "I love you too Y/N, but I wouldn't want you to turn down a great opportunity for me. We would have figured it out and who knows, maybe I'll even move up there with you someday." She said. You smiled at that. "I would love that."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A week later you had told your boss that you accept their offer and they were excited to have you running their second business. You were smart and they knew you would make great decisions pertaining to the company and their business. They really trusted you and that made you both excited and nervous. This was a very big step for you.

"So when are you leaving?" Tara asked.

You sighed a little before looking at her. "In a month. I'm getting all my papers organized and filed before I have to leave." You said. Knowing that you were leaving in a month made Sam very said because a month can go by so fast. She wished she had more time with you physically being here, but she will definitely not try to change your mind because this really is a great opportunity for you and even though it's hard she will very much support you no matter what.

"I didn't know it was that close. What made you take the job?" Tara asked.

You smiled a little as you took Sam's hand. "Sam. I wasn't sure at first and the moving made me nervous but your sister talked me into it. She told me this was a great opportunity and the money is great." You said. "This is going to change my life."

Tara was trying to read her sister but Sam didn't have that worried look on her face that she usually has and she just seems so ok with this. "Sam how do you feel about this? What are your thoughts?" She asked. Sam relaxed a little bit as she squeezed your hand a bit. "I feel good. I think this is a great opportunity for Y/N and I know we'll be back together in no time." She said simply. You smiled as you looked at her. "Don't forget we have weekends. I can always come down here and we can spend the whole weekend together." You told her. Sam nods and smiles at you. "I know."

A/N: this has been in my drafts since my b'day back in October and I honestly think it's time to post it as it is. With that being said, the moving will continue in the next part with a time just a couple months ahead.

[wolf-tail]

General Frustration With Helluva Boss

Sometimes, dealing with Vivziepop media is exhausting. One one hand, you have the violent irrational hateboner for anything and everything she's ever touched that a lot of people, especially on tumblr, have. It feels less born out of actual criticism and that weird flavor of "ouroboros snake eating it's own tail" cringe culture that a lot of people (mainly tumblr users) feel for anything that reminds them too much of their middle school selves. Like, ya'll picked Hazbin over South Park in the "worst cartoon ever" pole. South Park, the show that made antisemetism cool to hundreds of white tweens. That South Park. Yeah, that flavor of criticism is about as helpful or productive as bullying the kids in your local dead mall's Hot Topic.

On the other hand, you have the people who act like Viv and her team are incapable of wrongdoing and that any direction their projects going is the direct word of god and criticism of any aspect of either of her shows is a literal war crime.

I belong to neither camp because I enjoy my ability to critically think.

They're a long, LONG shot from perfect but there are things to like about both shows. Unfortunately, there's even more to criticize.

The Hazbin/Helluva fandom has a reputation for being childish, (often because a lot of them are actual children who have no business watching either show), whiny, and media illiterate. A creator can rarely if ever be blamed for the stupidity of certain members of their fanbase, though. Given the inane and frankly ridiculous misinterpretation of the character of Stolas by fans who are dead-set on viewing him through the most red-tinted "Ron the Death Eater" headass lenses, if I were a writer for Helluva I'd be tearing my damn hair out. But, sometimes, I wonder if Helluva's writing encourages the kind of dumbassery it's fans are prone to, mainly, with the latest short.

As soon as I saw the thumbnail, I knew what was coming. I tried to stay hopeful, I tried to think that Viv and her team wouldn't do this, but my expectations for this show are probably wayyyy higher than they should be.

The Helluva Shorts are Viv's little way of having her cake and eating it, too. With the plot of the full episodes being almost completely dedicated to more drawn-out character driven emotional beats, the shorts are allowed to maintain the monster-of-the-week mercenary assassination type plots, where I.M.P. has a target to kill and a specific goal to overcome for the episode. (Short 1 is an exception, and strangely the best out of all of them. It helps develop Millie's almost completely flat character and prioritizes her over the male characters she typically gets shafted for.) Short 3, Weeaboo-boo, is the weakest short by far, something even hardcore fans of the show would agree on.

To spare everyone the misfortune of having to watch it, let me summarize:

I.M.P.'s latest target is Emberlynn Pinkle, a twenty-something college student living at home with her parents. Her case file actually gave me some hope for this short, as the reason I.M.P.'s client wants her dead is over bullshit and inane shipping drama, something I sadly have experience with. I thought this short was going to critique the kind of nonsense the worst types of fans (like the ones outlined above) get up to, but instead, it just took one big look at fandom culture as a whole, and like a woman-hating redditor obsessed with powerscaling, decided to spit in it's face and call it a whore.

Emberlynn is portrayed as a sickeningly cliche charicature of female fandom, a horny loser burdening her parents, obsessed with sex, who writes dumb and lame fanfics about her dumb and lame self-insert oc. She feels like she was an attempt at a tounge-in-cheek little self-depreciating humor bit about fandom, but feels stale and mean-spirited.

She's a loser weirdo for being a monsterfucker, despite half the jokes in the show being about weird kinky sex. She's a horned-up creep for getting exited about being hunted by a demon and thinking he's here to have sex with her, despite that being THE LITERAL FIRST THING STOLAS DOES WHEN BLITZ BREAKS INTO HIS HOUSE, the only difference between him and Emberlynn being that Stolas has a tragic backstory, and is a man. Blitz kills her and sends her to hell, where she gets a sickass demon form I might add,

and is nothing more than a stalky, obsessive fangirl.

...

Do you ever wonder why creators hate their female fans?

We've already done this same song and dance with Supernatural, but I expected Vivzie, a woman herself who's made jokes about the kind of misogyny women in her field of work experience, to not treat female fandom with the same "icky girls ruin everything with their stupid horny bullshit" sentiment that the Japanese incels on 2chan who came up with the word fujoshi. But I expected too much from her I guess. How the fuck did The Amazing World of Gumball handle fanfic culture in a genuinely funnier and kinder way than she did!?

Viv is just doing what she does best, creating a female character with interesting potential and the teeniest weeniest bit of something resembling body diversity in her cast of stick figures, making her annoying, and letting her rabidly misogynistic fanbase trample all over her. She did it to Mimzy, and funnily enough, Emberlynn kinda looks like her.

This short sucked complete ass, and is just more proof that Viv sucks at writing female characters. I'm disappointed, she did Emberlynn and Mimzy so damn dirty.