#because i keep thinking that this whole thing happens in the first ep when it actually takes place in ep 3 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jemmo · 3 months

Text

Making sense of love for love's sake: the game

Despite all the things i absolutely adore about how the plot unravels and expands in love by love's sake, upon first watch, there's some things i couldn't piece together, which @lurkingshan echoes in their post:

'The way the author was messing with Myungha and forcing cruel choices on him really does not track with a desire to help him find happiness.'

And to preface, this is not something i fully get yet either. I think i'll need a good month and a sizeable reading list of relevant resources to understand just what/who this author/sunbae is and what his role is and how he is associated with myungha. But as always with the best shows for meta (aka bad buddy), as a plot unfolds, you can always find a better understanding by looking backwards and re-contextualising what you've already seen. so i watched ep 1, specifically the scene between myungha and his sunbae at the bar. And i will talk about how everything said in this scene has a whole new meaning now we know the full story, but for now i wanna focus on that question that they keep coming back to; "Then... will you change it for him?".

When you watch the show for the first time, your brain follows the simplest, most obvious version of the story you're being told, one where myungha has been pulled into the world of his sunbae's novel that's being turned into a game and given the opportunity to fix the thing he didn't like about it; making yeowoon happy, and thus you just think the rules of the game are imposed by the author, and so when these cruel choices first come up, you see them as the difficult roadblocks that are nevertheless necessary to any kind of game, forcing the player to make an impossible choice so that the game can continue in a certain direction and its only after that you learn whether it was the right choice or not, or there is no right choice, it simply changes the game you are playing.

And when its revealed what this game actually is, at first i tried to interpret these cruel choices, namely the choice between yeonwoon and myungha's grandma, and at best i could come up with the concept of this being a choice between staying stuck to the past aka choosing his grandma, even though he knows that choice doesn't mean she's safe bc he knows the future where he loses here, its an inevitability, but thats the small happiness he knew before it was taken away and thus that happiness is known and safe, theres no risk, versus choosing to pursue a new happiness, a love of yeowoon and thus himself, which he doesn't know, he hasn't experienced yet, and could be risky. Its a happiness that isn't guaranteed like his grandma, but its a happiness that looks to the future and has hope in it that he can find a new happiness to pursue despite what has happened in his past.

And that fits nice, okayish. But then i watched ep 1 and heard that question "Then... will you change it for him?" And watching through the rest of the eps, we come back to this scene at the bar and each time we get a new run up to the author asking this question, either new dialogue is added or we hear a different piece of the conversation entirely. It starts at the beginning of ep 1 as:

"Because Cha Yeowoon is the only one who's miserable." "It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile."

Then a bit later in ep 1 we go back and its expanded.

"It can't be helped that some people's lives are like that" "The fact that some people are destined to live that kind of life is what's vile." "Why? Do you think you'd write it differently?" "Yes, definately. Someone like Cha Yeowoon, or someone like me with an awful life, can also be happy."

And then all the way on in ep 6, we get this new dialogue.

"I don't like talking about destiny." "Why?" "Because it means everything is predestined." "Then do you not believe in fate?" "Fate and destiny are the same. My grandma likes to say that. She said life is like a written book, and how you'll live and die are written in it. (...)I don't like things like this. Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." "Really? Then Myungha..."

And while we don't hear the author ask the same question, I feel like him getting cut off like that insinuates that the conversation leads to that same ending point. All that is to say, every time we hear this question being asked, its like we learn more and more about what this whole thing is, what the game is, what myungha is saying he will do by agreeing to do what the author asks. And every time, we see myungha being more defiant against the idea of yeowoon being resigned to his miserable ending. He starts off thinking that kind of life is destined, and while it's miserable, its not something he can fight. Then he says he'd want to write the story differently, bc yeowoon, or even him, could be happy. He challenges the idea that yeowoon, and thus himself, is fated to be miserable, and opens up the possibility for happiness for them both, but doesn't yet have the means or resolve to do it, its like he knows its possible on a fundamental level, but doesn't see it as something he can actually achieve. But then we circle back to the idea of destiny and books, both of which came up in the previous quote, and seems incredibly pertinent seen as this whole thing is about a novel this author has written. Myungha talks about how he hates the idea that life is a book where everything written is predestined to happen, from the moment you live to the moment you die. He says "Even if fate is already destined, I think it can still be changed. Otherwise, there's no point in trying." That vile way of life he described before that he said was destined, he is now saying it can be changed, and that possibility is now something he's holding onto, its what he sees hope in so that he can keep trying, bc now he finally is trying, he has the resolve, he's trying to realise this thing, this impossibility of rewriting the life he thought was destined through the way he loves yeowoon.

And coming back to those cruel choices, given this fresh context, it made me think. bc this isn't actually a game that myungha has been put into where the rules are dictated by an author completely separate from him. He said himself, he'd rewrite it, he'd change things for yeowoon. And when you start to think of it less as him fighting against a rigid, removed system and more like him being a character in a story he is trying to rewrite himself, that has both the author and his own limitations, or just his own if you're in the school of thought that the author is some figment or part of myungha himself or his conciousness, then you can start to see where these cruel choices might come from. They could be myungha, the author making edits to this new story, imposing his own doubts and limitations on himself. When he says he has to pick between Yeowoon and his grandma, what if that's the new author myungha seeing this story unfold and thinking no this isn't right, he can't have it all, i'm not deserving of this much happiness.

And what makes me like this idea even more is that when we get that second choice between ending after 14 days or getting 100 days back at the cost of resetting Yeowoon's affection to 0, that whole conversation happens in what I think the bar actually is which is this frozen moment in time where myungha is in the water with this extension of a voice in his head that is talking through these things. That conversation in itself needs its own post, but when you look at it both as a decision to break up or not or a decision to hold onto life or not, you can see how the author is just this soundboard relaying the decisions myungha is going through in his head. The author's voice is his own, weighing up his decisions. And if he is the author here, it only reinforces that the person making the rules of this game is him. You can even extend it further to the idea of the debuffs, where he puts in place this thing that makes it so he causes harm to yeowoon when he's around, and its only by garnering affection that he can prevent it. He gives himself a reason from the get go to stay away from yeowoon and reason it as him doing it for yeowoon's safety, when in fact the only way to make yeowoon safe is to increase his affection, which he can only do by being near him. Its a system that at first gives myungha a reason to stay away aka not like himself, but ultimately says the only way you're going to make yeowoon like you, or the only way you can like yourself, is if you accept risk. And that in itself screams to me of a myungha writing in these game systems that are trying to encourage his own-self love while falling at the hurdle of his own lack of self-worth.

The idea is still messy in my head even for me, but i just really like the idea that myungha could be trying to fix this thing both as a character and game master, and that both these versions of him have these flaws that manifest in their different ways to cause the events we see. It kinda is the definition of being your own worst enemy, the idea that in order to work towards loving yourself, the biggest obstacle you have to encounter is yourself, bc we are the ones holding ourselves back, making all these rules that make it harder to like ourselves and pursue our own happiness. The voices in our head telling us that we aren't good enough and aren't deserving are our own, and while the things that happen to us can inform what they say, we're the one's reinforcing those words. And what this show teaches us is that, if we're the one holding that pen all along, we can choose to change what those words are. If we make the rules, you don't have to create a game with concrete ultimatums, you can create a game where rules don't control you. Instead, you make the decisions, and you can make the ones that make you happy.

#wow look at me writing actual kinda thought out meta #also something something about how the pen being in his pocket wasnt a pen given to him by the author its a pen that was his the whole time #look even if this isnt the right interpretation as intended by the author i just kinda adore this headcanon ive come up with and i cant wai #to rewatch the show again through this lens and see if it holds up #i just adore the idea of this whole thing being this manifestation of a flawed doubtful person trying to navigate through their own messy #nonsensical thoughts to find their own happiness #bc yes thats what triggered me thinking of this whole thing. me seeing that post and thinking yeah that doesnt make sense7 #but then again when you tell yourself things an put your own mental blocks in the way they dont make sense either but you still have to fin #the ways to work around them in order to find happiness #like those things dont go away we just find the loopholes or the ways to overcome them that mean we can be happy #the game is your own mind - deal with your own existential crisis as you wish #anyway this is only part 1 in what i hope will be a very extensive meta analysis of this show - stay tuned #love for love's sake

195 notes · View notes

waggledoogledoggle · 3 months

Text

⚠️Spoilers for Hazbin ep 4⚠️

⚠️Also, this post will talk about Abuse and SA, it is briefly mentioned a few times throughout the rest of this… whole long thingy I wrote⚠️

⚠️Also, brief mention of the scene where someone tried to drug Angel⚠️

Ok, I am just genuinely baffled at the people who somehow find a way to hate on 'Loser, Baby'.

Like, if you don't like Huskerdust that's fine... but 'Loser, Baby' is not overshadowing/brushing off Angel's SA. It's not victim blaming. And it's not Husk telling Angel to just shut up and get over it.

Like I've seen it so much, and you know what? Fuck it. Welcome to my TedTalk on why it's not all of those things.

For starters: Husk doesn't know about Angel's SA

When Angel has his vulnerable outburst (Side note, props to Blake I mean, they said 'take 5' he heard 'change lives') he talks about how he feels like he has to act the way he does to keep Valentino happy because he stupidly sold his soul to him. That he wants to get drugged up because that’s his escape. That he wants to be broken because maybe, just maybe Val will let him go. He wants to be free, but he can't and he has no one to blame but himself.

"What's the worst part of this hell, I can only blame myself" is literally the pre chorus to his song (Poison), and that is what he shares with Husk.

Not once does he bring up his abuse or SA. If he did, do you think a song would have even happened? Look how Husk reacted when someone tried to drug Angel's drink! Now that Husk actually genuinely cares about him? Dead. Dead. Valentino would be dead.

We as the audience know more than the other characters. We were given the insight of Angel's true trauma.l that he deals with on the daily. You can't get upset at a character for not knowing something they would have no way of knowing unless it was shared with them.

Moving onto the song itself, it's a song of empathy.

Allow me to explain.

Husk pinpoints perfectly what Angel is feeling in this moment:

"So things look bad, and your back's against the wall Your whole existence seems fuckin' hopeless You're feelin' filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall Can't face the world sober and dopeless You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked"

When Husk starts singing, you can tell that Angel is expecting Husk to pull the whole "But that's not true! It's not hopeless! You're life's not wrecked!" and is very surprised when Husk doesn't.

Instead, Husks says "Yeah. You're right." And this is when a lot of the haters get angry- but hold on a second.

When someone is feeling all of those things, saying things like "That's not true! You'll be ok!" aren't helpful at all. That's brushing it off. Even if it may be true, that doesn't help anyone when they're feeling like hopeless, lost, losers.

Because that's sympathy, not empathy. Sympathy is feeling for someone, and trying to make them feel better. Empathy, is not trying to make them feel any certain way- better or worse- empathy is simply feeling with someone. And that's what Husk does.

During the first chorus, Husk is clearly teasing Angel a bit while doing so, but not without good reason. It's keeping Angel from closing back up again, he's being a little bit silly with him and teasing him. I mean, did you see the silly lil walk he did crossing in front of Angel? And Angel is super confused because he's like "how tf is this supposed to make me feel better??"

That's the thing. It's not. That's sympathy's job, not empathy's. Empathy just want's you to feel felt with, it doesn't want to tell you how to feel. And adding that bit of silliness gives Angel's vulnerability a chance to breathe and it prevents Angel from closing in on himself.

The next verse, pre-chorus, and chorus is when the empathy though really kicks in.

The next verse, is the first part of empathy: Sharing about a similar experience you went through.

In this verse, now that Angel is listening not just hearing, Husk shares that he has been gruesomely damaged. Calling back to what he shared literally seconds before the song. That he knows what it's like to sign away your soul, and constantly look back at it with huge amounts of regret. That knowing that moment is what turned him into the mess he is today, and that he has no one to blame but himself. Just like Angel.

Then in the pre-chorus where there's the whole:

"I sold my soul to a psychopathic freak Haha! And you think that makes you unique? Get outta here, man!"

That isn't Husk telling Angel to get over himself and this isn’t him undermining what Angel’s been through. That's him saying 'I did too, you're not alone’

And then the very simple word change from "you're" to "we're" in the chorus is SO FREAKING HUGE. Because Husk is essentially saying "You feel like a total loser right now. Ok. Then if what happened to you/what you went through makes you a loser, then I'm a loser too. Let's be loser's together." Instead of trying to make Angel stop feeling like he's a hopeless loser, he decides that he is too.

He meets Angel where he is.

Aka: ✨empathy✨

Angel finally feels seen, understood, felt with. All the goals of empathy. He no longer feels alone in what he is struggling with, which is HUGE! Especially for people going through/dealing with SA and abuse.

The bridge of the song, is also extremely important, because this is where they acknowledge the differences in what they're going through. Their root problem is the same, but how it messed up their lives and created the problems they deal with now are completely different

And that's around when the song begins to shift from just Husk showing empathy and comforting Angel, to them both finding comfort in each other.

Which you can clearly see by the chorus under the umbrella, where it's not just one of them singing the chorus, but it's both of them. Because they have found a place to go to and confide in, a place of comfort, with each other.

Like, I am genuinely concerned that people find this song toxic like... have- have you never experienced empathy before? Are you ok?

So yeah, to wrap this up, if you don’t like ‘Loser, Baby’ just because you don’t like the song in general? That’s fine (odd, but fine)

But if you hate it because it “undermines Angel’s experience and what he goes through” I…

words.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

#Welp #ADHD stole my phone again #I’m so normal about them #the songs been out for a day how the hell have I analyzed it this much already tf #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin hotel husk #huskerdust #hazbin hotel #HH #HH spoilers #hazbin hotel spoilers

216 notes · View notes

fellthemarvelous · 5 months

Text

Staged and Good Omens: The discontinuity of a story within a story within a story.

I'm watching the third season of Staged again right now, and I think I've figured something out.

The discontinuity that people are talking about of Good Omens 2.

Staged 3 was a very modern version of A Christmas Carol. Ep 1. Is there a version? (David and Michael work with Simon again) Ep 2. Who's Playing Who? (Scrooge, episode was a farce) Ep 3. Past (Michael and David are co-dependent af) Ep 4. Present (Michael and David fail to write a script) Ep 5. Future (David tells everyone they are doing a live show) Ep 6. Knock, Knock (Simon gets even, ending is sad but not really because they are just taking a break and breaks don't last forever, and Simon gets a job offer based on his script for Knock, Knock, the one story he didn't write.)

The epic trainwreck that is David and Michael's live version of A Christmas Carol is actually a hit, but everyone else has to convince them to stop the show because it can't go on forever. So they end it with Michael and David agreeing to take a break from working together even though it makes both of them sad.

But the whole premise of Staged was that everything was filmed on iPads, computers and cell phones. And it was submitted to Simon so he could piece it together.

Simon Evans wrote Staged as a love story between David and Michael. Simon writes what he sees and finds ways to incorporate fiction into reality. He saw them on Good Omens together and he saw the chemistry between David and Michael, and he turned it into a comedy about these two eccentric actors who clearly love each other. And they agreed to star in it.

They improvised most of it, but Simon laid out the framework of the plot for them to follow, and then he let them be themselves.

The entire show has layers upon layers of meta weaved into it.

Anyway, my point is...

This post is one of several that covers the different ways discontinuity seems to occur during Good Omens 2. The evidence is very compelling.

I'm not here to point all that out because I don't have the strength of some of the meta writers in this fandom, and they're already on top of it, but if we look to Staged as an example, what is the plotline that Good Omens 2 is following?

Good Omens 2 is a modern version of.... Ep 1. The Arrival Ep 2. The Clue (A Companion to Owls) Ep 3. I Know Where I'm Going (The Resurrectionists) Ep 4. The Hitchhiker (Nazi Zombie Flesheaters) Ep 5. The Ball Ep 6. Every Day

What are the stories happening around Aziraphale and Crowley? They're the focal point of season two, but what else is happening?

Neil Gaiman has said that everything means something. They aren't just showing us these things by accident. There is a story happening outside of Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship. And we are all looking closely for that person doing a very odd thing just out of sight or objects being moved around without knowing how they got there in the first place.

There was literally an entire scene in Staged where they are trying to figure out who is playing Scrooge and Simon is so anxious that he keeps moving his plant between two different spots in the room. It also ends up with Georgia accidentally planning her own birthday party because David is in Tokyo. But then they cut at one point and you learn David was actually in his bedroom and not a hotel room in Japan and Georgia didn't really just plan her own birthday party. That chaos was scripted. David has to change clothes, they have to go several minutes back in the scene they just did, but as Anna points out, the sun is not in the same place it was when they started the scene. And then Michael loses his shit at Simon and storms off.

You think that's the reason Simon left, but then we get the episode where Georgia tells David Michael wants to write the script and then tells Michael that David wants to write the script. She does it so she can get them alone in a room together because people love watching them argue. They find out she set them up about six hours later. They are hungry and hot and annoyed and mad at her so she gets Simon to come back to work with David and Michael. Simon comes back from cosplaying as a dentist, brings the food Michael ordered hours ago, and sits down to write. Michael gets pissed off at Simon again because Simon forgot the prawn crackers, so he throws his food at Simon.

Some of these are of the past. Some are of the present. They were all filmed at the same time though so you don't know what happened when or why.

These scenes are all cobbled together. They tell a complete story though. The order just isn't exact.

The story we are seeing in season 2 isn't the real story. It was happening around Aziraphale and Crowley, but with them at the focal point, you get a romantic comedy and it distracts you from what's going on in the background.

There is more than one story in season 2. It's basically a jigsaw puzzle that we can try to piece together, but we won't know what's actually happening until we get the much needed context of season 3.

There are clues all over the place in Good Omens 2. The story is being told through so many other methods except for the one that makes the most sense to us because someone doesn't want us to see what's coming, so we get distracted by Nina and Maggie, Jim, Aziraphale and Crowley.

We know Muriel and Saraqael are up to something. We know Shax and Furfur are up to something. We know the Metatron is up to something. What we don't know is where God went. We hear God's voice in Companion to Owls and we hear God's voice speaking through and with Jim when Crowley orders him to tell them what is going on. It ties directly to the first time Crowley and Aziraphale ever worked together.

We know that Aziraphale is going to Edinburgh and he knows exactly where he's going because he and Crowley have been there before. It challenges the concept of good and evil because Crowley does the good thing and gets sucked into Hell. Right next to Gabriel's statue.

We know that Aziraphale picks up a hitchhiker even though he doesn't want to, and it turns out to be Shax. She reminds Aziraphale of the time that Furfur caught them working together. There were zombies and human magic tricks and Aziraphale uses sleight of hand to save Crowley from being dragged back down into Hell again.

The episode titles of Staged 3 all represent different chapters of A Christmas Carol. But it was more than that because Michael is upset with David for doing adverts without him after they were both asked to work together at first. They love each other and they love working together, but it's preventing them from doing other things they want to do. Hence the break from working together.

It's a story within another story within another story.

And I think that's what we are witnessing in Good Omens. Things aren't happening in the right order. Beyond the sadness of Aziraphale and Crowley splitting up, there is still the next apocalypse to deal with. The story we are getting in season two isn't happening sequentially. It's being manipulated to hide the signs that things are already underway by giving us a love story as a distraction.

And it works very damn well. Because the love story was beautiful.

Staged 3 ending

Good Omens 2 ending

#good omens #good omens meta #good omens theories #i am in no way saying that this is the answer #but it hit me while i was watching staged #staged #david tennant #michael sheen #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #michael and david

227 notes · View notes

maxphilippa · 5 months

Text

An Small Analysis Post On Lightbulb, Because I Hate How The Fandom Butchered Her Character As A Whole.

I'm making this post mostly as a reminder to myself To Not Hate Lightbulb because I actually think she's a pretty interesting character, but the way the fandom portrays her kinda ruined my interest for her.

The fandom's portrayal of Lightbulb ultimately just sticks to the nonsensical/silly aspect of her, which is pretty much what Lightbulb didn't want on canon to begin with. Interpretations and all that are understable, but I would like to just point out some things about Lightbulb. She's not just whimsy and sillyness and nonsense, her whole arc is about literally Toxic Positivity, Lack of Compromise, Lack of Leadership skills, Lack of Connection With Others and Unhealthy Copying Mechanisms.

Now Max, what the hell are you talking about? Well.

I personally think that Lightbulb is a genuinely good character. The way she copes with stuff really makes you see that she's really not doing great mentally. Of course, toxic positivity and sillyness may be her way to cope, because if no one sees her being vulnerable, they will never know what may hurt her the most.

I do think that she cared for Marsh in the same way Paintbrush did, but dare I say she also lacks emotional intelligence when it comes to comforting others or accepting those feels. Why talk about them seriously when you can just joke around and make them laugh about the issue? Of course that didn't happen.

Lightbulb has attachment issues, she doesn't want to be left alone, and she doesn't seem to be conscious over the fact that her attitude and way to approach others IS why she never truly got too many significant relationships at all until the very end, only for all of her friends to leave.

Having a "I don't care :]" attitude only did it so much worse for her on an emotional stand point because she ended up caring so SO badly for the remaining members of her group, and when her team was going down, she didn't know what to do or what to say at all. On late s2 she's actually getting the needs of her teammates and their struggles.

But I want to note something here. The reason as to why she "ditched" Test Tube so quickly on the alt dimension ep was because she thought that she found people that got her, people who were going through it but just wanted to keep thinking positively, and at the end of the day, that just doomed her. Because she realized that they weren't like that. She didn't find anyone that got how she felt.

You can only hide so much things with laughs and shenanigans and attitudes and addictions, before you realize that you have to own your mistakes and have to ACTUALLY TRY to be a better person.

Now, I don't think that Lightbulb meant things to go that way.

Thus all of these things are so much sadder when Fan and Test Tube get eliminated and Lightbulb is left alone. For the first time she ACTUALLY tried to let go off her unhealthy copying mechanisms and got close to people and lost them on the process. She lost all of her team because she didn't care seriously enough.

She's alone.

She doesn't like being alone at all.

So she's currently suffering the consequences of her actions.

And she doesn't like being alone.

Lightbulb struggles so SO much with having healthy relationships and healthy connections because she never was honest with herself at all. And when she realized that in order to be close to others, you have to grow and let yourself feel, it was far too late.

Her whole team is gone because of her lack of care for it and how she sucked at being a leader despite being an light to them, her unhealthy copying mechanisms indicate that she's been like that for a long time, and that the attitude she took was in order to cope with things feeling so so bad.

I really want to see what they'll do with her once s2 is back again. But for now, we can only hope so much.

#inanimate insanity #ii #inanimate insanity invitational #ii 2 #ii 3 #inanimate insanity lightbulb #inanimate insanity fan #inanimate insanity paintbrush #inanimate insanity test tube #ii lightbulb #ii fan #ii paintbrush #ii test tube #max overanalyzes characters

219 notes · View notes

cleolinda · 8 months

Text

(For our purposes, listen to it without the visuals first.)

I wasn't going to keep posting about Unreal Unearth, but something happened yesterday.

It's been five months since I first heard this song, and I'm still astonished by it. You know the tiktok skit about the Star Wars wedding music, and the guy is grooving along until the Imperial Death March filters in, and then he's kind of alarmed, like, wha—? And then he realizes it slaps anyway and he keeps dancing? That is "Eat Your Young."

It's the morning of March 17th. The EP with the first three singles from the new album has dropped. I've got my phone blasting the song on the bathroom counter, I don't understand half what the man is saying nor did I expect to, I'm cheerfully mumbling along in the shower, grooving along,

wait they did what for a war drum

Get some Pull up the ladder when the flood comes Throw enough rope until the legs have swung Seven new ways that you can eat your young Come and get some Skinning the children for a war drum Putting food on the table selling bombs and guns It's quicker and easier to eat your young

What the fuck, this song goes so hard. That's the chorus. The conceit of the whole album is that it loosely follows Dante's Inferno, so this is the third circle of hell, gluttony. Hozier himself says that he wasn't specifically thinking of Jonathan Swift's A Modest Proposal—

“I don’t know how intentional the reference to Jonathan Swift was in this. That essay [Swift’s 1729 satirical essay A Modest Proposal in which he suggests the Irish poor sell their children as food] is such a cultural landmark that it’s just hanging in the air. I was more reflecting on what I felt now in this spirit of the times of perpetual short-term gain and a long-term blindness. The increasing levels of precarious living, poverty, job insecurity, rental crisis, property crisis, climate crisis, and a generation that’s inheriting all of that and one generation that’s enjoyed the spoils of it. The lyrics are direct, but the voice is playful. There’s this unreliable narrator who relishes in this thing which was fun to write.” [Apple Music album notes]

—and I believe him. The song's not a suggestion, a proposal; it's an invitation to atrocity in progress. I also believe he probably wasn't thinking of Greta Thunberg's iconic speech at the UN Climate Action Summit, not specifically, but that's what I hear in the song, like the flip side of a coin:

You have stolen my dreams and my childhood with your empty words. And yet I'm one of the lucky ones. People are suffering. People are dying. Entire ecosystems are collapsing. We are in the beginning of a mass extinction, and all you can talk about is money and fairy tales of eternal economic growth. How dare you! [...] You say you hear us and that you understand the urgency. But no matter how sad and angry I am, I do not want to believe that. Because if you really understood the situation and still kept on failing to act, then you would be evil.

I feel like on some level, even coincidentally, "Eat Your Young" is the answer to the question, what would you sound like if you were that evil? Who would you be? I can think of a dozen possibilities just off the top of my head or looking around my blog, from something as petty as studio executives mangling trees to deprive striking workers of shade (while hoping they lose their homes), all the way up to the US school-to-prison pipeline. The National Rifle Association keeps politicians in its pocket while the US has more mass shootings than days in a year, Nestlé fucks shit up around the world as a way of life, even ChatGPT sucks up water while threatening jobs—and for what? And yet, I promise you most of these things weren't the inspiration for an Irishman’s song—some of them hadn't even happened yet. There's just that much fresh You Would Be Evil to go around. I am certain that Hozier wrote the song partly about (as one article puts it) "Ireland's housing crisis: Millennials, a generation sacrificed," given that time back in the day when he helped occupy a building—a housing crisis happening in multiple countries. There's so much of the world I'm not touching on. I can stuff a paragraph with links and it's utterly inadequate.

I haven't even mentioned war.

There's an overwhelming sense this decade of the future being fed into a meat grinder. That sense is in this song. What would it sound like to be in the head of someone who didn't give a shit about anything but profit? Well, it might sound like this.

And if you haven't heard it, well—I'm going to sound absolutely out of my mind after saying all that, but "Eat Your Young" has a beat and you can dance to it. It's sexy. And I'm certain that's on purpose. You get seduced into the sound of it, as if by something demonic, something that enjoys sucking down the future and is not going to stop. And the sheer fucking catchiness of the song keeps you listening to it—thinking about it—when maybe you push away the dry headlines we get everyday. If you let this song stay in your head, it becomes a lens. Five months later, I still think about it when I read the news. Maui was on fire and tourists stayed. Within days, the prospect of developers swooping in to buy up land reared its head. If there's something still to take, there is ground to break, whatever's still to come. Get some.

I was born in 1978 —I'm late Gen X. In my forties, I'm young enough to worry about the future still; I’m neither so rich that I can just plan to retire to Mars, nor so old that I can know I'll be safely gone before the world might go up in flames. But I'm also not my nephew, whose school year just started back up, or the neighborhood kids who race him home down the sidewalk in the afternoons. Yesterday, he had his very first mass-shooter lockdown drill. He’s six.

I think music can put the feeling back into numb fingers, and I think that's why "Eat Your Young" works so well—Hozier calls the song fun and playful, and I think you have to have that, something you can live with rather than just switch off for your own mental survival. We need music to feed spirit at protests; we need something to keep our feet moving. Don’t give up, don't close your eyes and slip away. Those kids, they have dreams we could try to steal back for them.

Since I mentioned Maui:

Why Hawaiian sovereignty has undeniable context for the Maui fires

The Climate Crisis and Colonialism Destroyed My Maui Home. Where We Must Go From Here

How You Can Donate and Help Support Maui Communities Right Now

The Maui Strong Fund

#music #music discussion #hozier #long post #eat your young #Spotify

260 notes · View notes

bunnakit · 4 months

Text

last twilight ep 7 thoughts, feelings, etc

ALRIGHT i ran my errands, caught up on pit babe and playboyy to relax, and now i'm doing my speedwatch. i took some notes while watching the first time and they're a fucking MESS but hopefully they help me remember everything i want to comment on because without fail i always forget something.

you'll all be glad to know this week's meta bullshit from me is far, far less romantic and wistful than last weeks. you've all been spared by my adhd brain not being able to piece together a single poetic thought.

i kind of knew from this moment the trajectory the episode would take. Day is clearly nervous but not defensive - this isn't out of the realm of something Mhok would do for him but with recent context it probably feels fairly intimate. i think this was a really good indicator of what we're in for.

there's a collection of sunflowers in Day's room, tucked away in the corner, not unlike Mhok tucking away his feelings for Day's comfort. the poor things are shrouded in shadow, away from the light. the pain is unending and forever.

Day's flashback to the kiss has me curious. his eyes are closed so he's not even thinking back to seeing what he can of Mhok up close. as he reminisces about this kiss is he simply remembering the sensation of Mhok's lips on his own? how his hands curled into Mhok's jacket? and i'm sure we've all seen the post but - was he thinking of the way Mhok tasted like cigarettes? this isn't to romanticize his disability, i'm just genuinely wondering what exactly he's drawing on here in this moment, because it's clearly something significant to him.

Porjai just keeps getting prettier every episode and it's making me insane. i just think i should be allowed to take care of her.

"I'm jealous of Day's ability to make you smile."

this makes me think Mhok's smiles have been few and far between, and maybe Porjai has been looking to bring out that smile for a long time. does she ever worry that maybe someday Mhok could end up like Rung? does she worry about finding him too?

oh i so very badly want the context for this, i want to know everything. but also, it's really not that surprising. not when we've seen the things Mhok has done for Day. Mhok lives his life in extremes; anger, kindness, protectiveness, his work, etc. everything Mhok does he puts his whole self into it and it's nice to see his love is no different, because why would it be?

i'm once again in awe of what P'Aof has done with Mhok and Porjai, though. they live together so easily and naturally. there's nothing strange or awkward about it, just two people surviving life together. it's such a breath of fresh air.

Day just cannot catch a break when it comes to August. this has to hurt so fucking badly, the pity has to feel amplified by 1000. not only was August trying to force himself to like Day back because he's blind, but also because he was thinking of leaving. Day is a stronger man than me because i would be frothing at the mouth pissed.

but once again, Mhok doesn't let Day stew in his fish tank. he encourages him to go out and resolve his feelings, even if that means screaming at August and letting out all his hurt and frustration. he's seen what happens when Day lets his hurt fester and he won't let it happen again, not while he's around.

"He's a lot stronger than I thought. It's me who's so weak that I let him down."

as much as August pisses me off, i do think this is him realizing his pity was misplaced, and he failed Day in that way, so he gets some redemption points here. (still think he's a stinky bastard man tho)

the immediate distance Mhok puts between himself and the group never fails to hurt my heart. i get it, he's there for a job, but their relationship has progressed past that - now even moreso, and i cant help but wonder if this is his attempt at keeping a distance, curbing his expectations, reminding himself that while his role is to be by Day's side it's only in a professional capacity.

i love that Gee acknowledges him with a little head nod, occasionally looks in Mhok's direction as if to include him, she's just - ugh - i love all the women in this show so fucking much. i just wish someone would invite Mhok over sometime, encourage him to join the conversation (like they did back at the party.)

sometimes Mhok really is the embodiment of a shadow - both of Day and of his former self (for good or bad.)

(he looks so fucking sexy leaning like that with his shirt tucked into his pants tho, whew.)

Gee also becomes one of my favorite people for asking Day to take the photo of all of them. she just gets it, she includes him, she doesn't act like he can't do things, she even insists he can, she's just !!! the women of all time in this show i swear!!! I LOVE WOMEN!!!!

also the "you don't drink coffee, girl spill the tea" from Gee is just so good. she knows a diversion tactic when she sees one.

i want this expression framed, she's so cute, HELP.

i wish i had the time and energy today to make gifs for this week but ugh. the journey Mhok's face went on here to end up at quiet resignation. because he did figure. someone like Day? with someone like him? because we know Mhok's opinion of himself isn't great, largely influenced by his incarceration and reintegration into society, i'm sure, along with his guilt. but there had been that little bud of hope, a little sunflower seed that had bloomed just a little too far, reached for the sun a little too much. it must feel like a weed in his chest.

the way Day says 'here' so softly, with so much vulnerability made me feel like screaming. he doesn't know what his feelings are for Mhok yet (you can't tell me he doesn't feel anything) but he knows he doesn't want to lose Mhok and the sudden idea of it is terrifying. Mhok is the only person that really understands him, one of the only people he's comfortable around anymore, and he can't lose that. he doesn't want to go back to the dirty fish tank.

i also think this was an indicator to Mhok that maybe Day doesn't know how he feels, and maybe he can get away with flirting in tiny, subtle ways because from here on his secret flirting game is in full effect and it's so fucking cute. he's careful not to completely push past Day boundaries, but to test them in gentle ways.

THE SHOES MY BELOVEDS. we all know what i feel about these shoes after last week and i'm so glad to see all of my stupid babbling confirmed here. i love that Mhok constantly mends things instead of throwing them away. the sentimentality of items means something to Mhok and we love him for that.

we also got a proper 'sweet dreams' this episode, finally!! thank you subbers!

so many shots of feet this ep tho and lemme tell you as someone that HATES feet, this was rough.

oh you are so smitten. Day realizing Mhok is warm, warm in his own way, warm in such a gentle and understated way. UGH. you would've thought he knew after everything they've been through but sometimes people need a reminder and maybe something to drive them to pay closer attention. our boy is BESOTTED. kicking his feet and giggling. i think this is the happiest we've ever seen him.

so here's where i'm probably going to wax poetic the most. Mhok is finally opening up to Day in such an incredible way. he brings Day to his home with no fear of pity or judgement. he brings him into this sanctuary created by him, his sister, and Porjai and he cooks for him and cares for him and in letting him in Day sees even more how impossibly warm Mhok is.

what's even greater is there isn't a single moment where Day is jealous or questions Porjai being there. Mhok has told him she's expecting and he's never weird about it, just kind and understanding and it's all so normalized, it's fucking beautiful. Day even takes the time to encourage Porjai, to share about his mom, and about the strength it takes to be a single mom. P'Aof i adore you.

Mhok has planted jasmine simply because he knows Day likes it, and maybe now he likes it too. and he brings Last Twilight home to practice reading (i'd always wondered how he managed to read without stumbling over himself lmao) and he's done it so much that now Porjai wants to name their child Mee, wants to create this connection to Day forever.

and once prompted, once Day knows enough to ask, Mhok opens up about Rung, talks about her more. Day comments on the warmth of the house, something started by Rung and cultivated by Mhok. it would be so easy for the house to feel cold and clinical, especially knowing what happened here, but Mhok has kept it a home - warm, inviting, comforting - all the things Mhok has been to Day.

the noises took me by fuckin' surprise tho, i genuinely looked around my house like who the fuck is making all that noise and then i was like OH THOSE ARE-- OKAY--

and I know people are like haha P'Aof has a scent kink but like. idk. maybe it's just me but scents are something i'm drawn to. i remember the way someone smelled more than i remember their face. i recently took a shirt out of my closet and immediately started crying. it smelled like face powder and perfume. it smelled like my grandma. the leather jacket pushed to the side smells like cigarettes and horses, like my dad always did.

scent is such an ingrained memory, something that is so hard for our brains to let go of. every time i get a familiar smell it knocks me on my ass, and i'm so glad to see some of this represented in these shows.

this absolutely warmed my heart. whatever is going on with Night and Day is clearly more on Day's side than anything else. Night clearly loves his brother and i'm just fucking DYING to know what is going on that is causing Day to drive a wedge between them. sure, Night hasn't been perfect, but there's love there and that counts for so much.

and what exactly are you doing here??? this is a charity run for blindness - does he know someone that is blind other than Day? did meeting Day inspire him to participate? has he spent time talking to Mhok about Day and maybe the difficulties of his blindness? i am filled with questions but i love this character so much, he's just so kind.

Day's hesitation to cross the finish line was also something i found so interesting. it felt long, possibly too drawn out, but Day needed to think, needed time to understand that if he crosses that finish line, if he accepts Mhok's request to be his boyfriend, their lives will never go back to how they were. things between them will change forever, whether the relationship is a success or otherwise. it's an incredibly mature thing of Day to do, even if it felt a little lengthy for us, the audience.

i strongly believe that in addition to Mhok Porjai is going to be a big driving force in Night and Day's reconciliation. i would love to see Porjai gain Night's side of the story, Mhok gain Day's side of the story, and the two of them working together to see how they can reunite these brothers.

also if i had a nickle for every time P'Aof paired Mark with a pregnant woman in his shows i'd have two nickles, which isn't a lot but it's interesting it has happened twice.

while i, like everyone else, hope the mock proposal is a parallel we get to see later i want to focus more on this moment.

i forget who said it, it's long gone to the depths of my dash by now, but someone commented that disabilities do not stop for love, and fuck is that so true. i love Mhok's concern, his immediate reaction to soothe, and the way he seems to feel Day's fear as his own. and poor Day, he can't even enjoy this moment of bliss with Mhok because of course, of course something like this had to happen. it's so fucking real in the way Last Twilight has been this entire time.

the constant excellent representation of disabled living has been incredible to see, i've seen so much of myself in this show (even though my disability is so very different) and it's been like a warm blanket put over very single comment: you're too young to be disabled, you aren't THAT disabled, you're being dramatic, etc.

from the bottom of my heart, thank you P'Aof and team.

tag loves: @benkaaoi @callipigio @infinitelyprecious (as always tell me if you want to be added {for LT only or all meta} or removed!)

#bunn meta #last twilight #last twilight the series #mhokday #morkday #userjamiec #im soooo fuckin sleepy after making this but i still have to work #someone come make me tea and gimme a little kith

123 notes · View notes

whateverisbeautiful · 2 months

Text

♥️ Ranking Richonne

#2: I'm Still With You (S5E16)

My favorite pre-canon Richonne scene. 😍 This moment is something special and monumental for many reasons. Plus it features my favorite thing Michonne has ever said to Rick in TWD. To me, the connection, vulnerability, and steam in this scene are nearly equal to some of Richonne's passionate exchanges during their post-canon era. I love that this moment makes it loud and clear that these two have a very powerful effect on each other. And most importantly, I adore this scene for cementing that Rick and Michonne are with each other always. 🥹 What a gift...

A lot of relationships can appear strong during happy times when both individuals are on the same page. However, it's during those challenging periods, when two hold different outlooks and have a multitude of things weighing on them, that the true strength of a relationship really becomes evident.

So part of what puts this scene so high on my list is that it is one of the clearest depictions of why Richonne's relationship is so deep and durable. Because even at this time when circumstances could have easily caused a major divide between them, Michonne and Rick instead choose each other and prove this is a relationship that they sincerely value in the good times and the hard times too.

But, before we get into the #2 scene, we have to talk about some scenes that proceed it in the s5 finale. 🤗

As I’ve said in a previous post, I think this scene where Rick wakes up to find Michonne watching over him and they finally talk about his headspace is extremely revealing of how he views her. Rick telling Michonne, "Well you wanted this place," just really hammered home that in many ways she’s in the wife category to him. Rick was trying to secure this place for team family, but especially for Michonne in a way that he wasn't able to do for Lori.

The scene opens with Rick asleep after Michonne quite literally knocked some sense into him the prior ep, and it's funny that when he stirs awake, he laughs almost amused as he recalls the wild stuff that happened leading up to this point.

Then Michonne asks, "What’s so funny?" and you see a surprised little look on Rick's face as he asks, "You were here the whole time?" And I like that there’s not an ounce of frustration towards her after knocking him out. He gets it.

I love that Michonne is the one in here with him. Even knowing Rick has been wildin' out she’s still protective of him. Cuz she can knock him out but that doesn’t mean she’s gonna let anyone else come for him. It’s like a visual representation of the sentiment she’ll later express in my golden #2 scene.

Michonne even says she was there with Rick all night, which is such an indicator of her love for him. And then because she knows his laugh meant something, she reiterates "What’s so funny?," and I love that Rick is willing to be vulnerable about his headspace with her when he admits to her that mentally he’s still stuck in the train car from Terminus.

Michonne gives him the rundown of what he missed, and it’s clear she was thoroughly holding down the fort and keeping the peace while he was out of it.

Then I appreciate that Michonne closes some of the distance between them when she pulls her chair closer and asks, "Rick, what are you doing?"

It’s clear she’s concerned about him, and I like that she asks this way. It’s not accusatory like, 'What were you thinking?' or derogatory like, 'What’s wrong with you?' She wants to know what he’s doing cuz clearly she can tell Rick thinks he’s doing what he has to even though he really doesn’t have to. And if he’d be honest with her, she could help him see that.

Like in this scene, Michonne really could have told Rick...

And she'd be right lol. 😋 However, when she asks this, Rick doesn’t have an answer so then Michonne for the first time addresses the Pete and Jessie situation.

She says, "You could have told me what was happening." And there’s a deeper reason Rick didn’t tell her, beyond what he’ll claim here when he just says "it moved fast." He kept people closest to him like Carl, Michonne, and Glenn out of the loop about the Anderson situation because in many ways his off behavior in that situation was not rooted in clarity but rather in the unresolved wound of losing Lori without closure and the severe PTSD that everything about ASZ triggered within him.

He says it moved fast “and then Noah.” The way Rick says that part feels like he knows how hard Noah’s loss was on Michonne. We saw her grieving Noah a bit in a prior ep too. Which would make sense, especially because Noah, as a kid who didn’t make it, could stir up a lot of pain over losing Andre for her. 😢

Rick says he couldn’t tell her about the gun and, while it could seem like he says it like he couldn’t trust her with that info, he knows what he really means which is what he’ll reveal later - that he couldn’t tell her cuz she had the power to talk him out of it.

Michonne sarcastically says, "nah you couldn’t," cuz she knows Rick knows good and well he can tell her anything.

It becomes clear that Rick meant he couldn’t tell her because of her influence on him when he says, “Well you wanted this place.” Again, I’ll always love the significance and delivery of this line. And he’s not saying this accusatory. He knows finding a home meant something to her, and it meant something to him that Michonne got what she wanted.

It really feels like during this whole arc, Rick didn’t want to tamper with Michonne's experience in ASZ by roping her into his underhanded plans with Daryl and Carol because they were plans that suggested the place could fall or not work out, and he knows Michonne wanted to believe in this place.

Along with knowing Michonne could talk him out of this approach, I've always felt like part of why Rick kept her out of the plans - plans that normally he would want her fully involved in - was because of his desire to "give her this place" without the burden of expecting things to go wrong.

Think about pretty much all of Rick and Michonne's scenes in ASZ leading up to this point, especially the scene where he looks right at Michonne as he "signs the papers" and agrees to be a constable with her the day after she expresses to him that she would want a job. Each of their ASZ scenes suggested that even as Rick was spiraling on his own mental journey, everything in him still wanted Michonne to have this place, even if it meant carrying the burden of intense uncertainty on his own.

Fortunately, in this ep, Rick learns that he is no longer with a partner who expects him to carry any burdening issues alone ever. 🙌🏽

So then Michonne adamantly tells him they had to stop being out there, and she's right as always. Then Rick says, "Well we’re here," and I love Michonne’s response to this. She notes what Rick said earlier about still being mentally stuck in that train car when she compassionately says, “Well you just said you weren’t.”

And really it’s true, the poor guy has not been all there in ASZ hence some of his more volatile behavior. And Rick looks like he knows Michonne has a point when he stares at her in this moment.

Then when Carol, Abe, and Glenn walk in (which feels like they are walking in on the Richonne bubble) Rick is caught in the middle with Michonne on one end asking about the gun, and Carol on the other wanting him to lie.

And you can just tell that man does not want to lie to Michonne anymore. But he goes along with Carol’s story even tho Michonne ain’t buying it, looking at Rick and Carol like...

Later, Carol talks with Rick alone and is in his ear about continuing their trust-no-one approach. And the first thing Rick asks is why she didn’t want to tell Michonne, Glenn, and Abe about the gun. You know those magnets within him are ready to stop with the games that are causing distance with Michonne and come clean to her once and for all.

Carol seems to suggest that Michonne knocking Rick out might make her untrustworthy of being let in on their plans, but I adore that Rick so quickly and confidently defends Michonne, saying both that he deserved what Michonne did and that, "She’s with us."

He knows and trusts his woman, y'all. And I love that even after Michonne knocked him out and Carol's trying to cast doubts about her, Rick's still like...

In this whole ASZ situation Carol and Michonne reflect two different ways to approach ASZ. And in this scene with Rick and Carol, it’s clear that Rick has already been swayed more to Michonne’s side, especially as he tells Carol, "I don’t want to lie anymore."

This moment lets you know that without even directly talking him out of it, Michonne has again influenced Rick to no longer want to scheme and plot under the table. I know Rick hated feeling even remotely distant from Michonne, and he’s ready to fix that and stop lying to her asap.

Also, now you know I don’t really care to revisit any of those scenes, but all I’ll say about the scene with Jessie in this ep is it’s an interesting choice to have Rick only seen through the window when they talk. It again shows that in this situation he’s not all there, as Rick's not even seen present in the same shot as her, just a reflection of who he is.

But then, in this next scene, this Top 2 classic, not only is Rick directly in the shot with the woman he’s meant for, but the two get all up close and personal too...

Ok so on to my favorite pre-canon scene and top 2 moment. 🤩

I love that after such a compellingly wild journey with Rick’s character arc in season 5, his turning point back to some sense of sanity in the finale is in this moment with Michonne. She’s the person in his life most capable of helping him start seeing things clearer.

It reminds me of Rick’s other mental spiral arc in s3 and how his turning point was also Michonne-related as nearly giving her up sparked him to return to democracy. No matter how off the deep end Rick can go, something about Michonne can always bring him back. 💯

So the scene opens with Michonne approaching the room and softly saying, "Rick, you ready?" which I like especially because in 5.11 she had asked Rick that very thing right outside the gates of ASZ before they ever entered the community.

And in some ways, Rick wasn’t fully ready to let go of the fight and embrace this place back then, which has led to their current predicament. But even then, she still checks in on him now and wants to know where he’s really at with this.

(also the opening shot low-key feels like she's the angel arriving on his shoulder to guide him back to the light, if you ask me.)

This moment of her checking on him also sorta feels like it parallels that scene in The Distance when Michonne approaches Rick outside the barn while he works on a car. There's some similar positioning with him lower and her standing above, but the interesting difference is in 5.11 Rick and Michonne were discussing the potential for other people/communities to pose a threat, and here in 5.16 they have to deal with how Rick is now deemed the threat to the community.

Then I love that all Michonne has to say is just those three words - "Rick, you ready?" - and Rick is ready to completely spill everything. Like details and all with no hesitation. 😋

Rick lays it all out saying how he, Carol, and Daryl worked out the plan to keep guns together, and he lets Michonne know exactly what they took from the armory and exactly what they still have.

Rick says, “We lied to you cuz I wasn’t sure how you’d take it - what you’d do.” which has always been quite interesting to me because like he knows Michonne wouldn’t just straight up turn on him or fight him but I think just the mere thought that what she’d do is pull away from him or be disappointed was enough for Rick to feel he couldn’t risk telling her.

And I like how, as he says this, he holds his hand out to give her the gun as this symbol that not only is he confessing, but he’s ready to “turn himself in” in a sense and let her have the gun and have intel on the plan completely, rather than hide anything from her.

I feel like this moment really hammers home that Rick views Michonne as his partner. They'd been operating like partners and co-leaders so much before arriving in Alexandria, so Rick knows that Michonne is someone in the group who would have and should have been let in on these types of plans, which is why not telling her felt like a lie that weighed on him.

I like that when Michonne hears Rick say this, she puts the windbreaker down, knowing they need to have a moment and talk this out so she can let him know exactly where she stands.

She asks if he thinks she’d try to stop him, and Rick, always finding time to be a little teasing with her, says, "Well you did hit me over the head." You know he's teasing too cuz he literally just defended her doing this when he spoke with Carol earlier lol.

And I appreciate that Michonne wants it to be crystal clear she did that to help him and not for the others. "That was for you." Of course, it’s for him, and doing what she thought was best to help him.

Even before hearing her say this, you know Rick believes that she did this with his best interests in mind.

And then I adore that he gets extra vulnerable for this next part, with this being his turn to close the distance between them.

Rick stands up and gets super close to her - cuz magnets - and he finally tells Michonne that he didn't tell her about the guns because “I was afraid you’d talk me out of it…you could’ve.”

Y'all, I love this. 😊 That "you could've" is going to hit my heart every time.

I’ve mentioned other pre-canon moments on this list where Rick has told on himself in terms of what he feels for Michonne. But none more than in this moment right here does Rick outright expose that Michonne has a very special and substantial influence on him.

It’s a big deal one; for her to have this power, two; for Rick to know Michonne has this power, and three; for him to then straight up tell her she has this power.

This is extremely significant, especially because Rick was seemingly at his most dazed during this 5B arc and said himself he was in the middle of losing his mind...and yet even in that disoriented state, he still had enough wherewithal to be aware that Michonne could get him to change course if she so much as talked to him about the situation.

Like homeboy was struggling to know right from left at this time, but one thing he did know was that Michonne had the power to heavily influence his choices and actions.

Rick Grimes won’t just let anybody talk him in or out of things, and yet Michonne effortlessly can do both as we saw throughout s5 and beyond. He also trusts her to know the immense influence she has without manipulating it. And honestly, he picked a good person to give this power to because Michonne is always right. 👑😌 Like fr...

I love that Rick finally came right out with it and told her this because he seemed to deep down know it was the case all along. Michonne means a whole lot to him, he fully respects her wisdom and ideas, and something in him always wants to give her what she wants, and in some capacity, he knows this about himself even here pre-canon.

As this is the season 5 finale, this is when they tie up a lot of arcs and storylines, and it’s fitting after a season where Michonne so fully stepped up as Rick's co-partner and both led alongside him and led him - the season ends with Rick actively knowing that just Michonne’s words, hell even a mere look, could influence his decisions on crucial matters. Even after losing it a bit in Alexandria, he still knows he'd trust Michonne’s gut even over his own. 👌🏽

And for him to say, "I was afraid..." I love the vulnerability. This is the Rick Grimes who has often had to come across as fearless to those they encounter, but here he can be honest and human and let her know that the influence she has over him is strong enough to even make him afraid.

Deep down something in Rick knew that Michonne has his whole heart and that he’ll ultimately be swayed to do what she says. Also, the visual of the two together is just so pleasing and the chemistry is always 🔥🔥.

And then cuz you know these equals stay taking turns sending my heart soaring - it’s Michonne’s turn to have me jumping for joy when she responds to him. (That's part of what makes this a top 2 moment because Rick and Michonne both have a line that just leaves me endlessly beaming 🤗)

First, Michonne so gently tells Rick they don’t need the guns here, and she doesn’t need her sword. It makes me think of the really sweet and sociable honorable mention moment they had in 5A when Rick asks her about her sword, and she says she doesn’t miss her sword but rather misses people they love like Hershel. Both these moments show she's always had such a solid perspective. 👑

Also y’all, as Michonne is talking to Rick in this s5 finale moment, again I have to point out the way Rick is looking at her...Whipped with a capital W. He looks so entranced that he again has to have one of those signature not-so-slick look-up moves he does whenever he knows he’s about to get lost in her lol.

I mentioned in a previous post that the story knew it wanted Rick and Michonne's journey to be that of an epic love story, hence why so many of their pre-canon scenes feel like they could fit perfectly into a romance. And you know who also naturally knew this - the Andrew Lincoln.

Because honey, the way his eyes always told the story that Rick was in love with Michonne 👏🏽👏🏽. Especially in this season 5 finale scene, all you have to do is look at Rick's eyes to know...

When Andy played our beloved sheriff during this pre-canon era, he basically said I don't really care what other storylines y'all got going on for Rick cuz whenever Rick is in front of Michonne he's going to look at her like she's the one for him really and truly. And I appreciate him for it. 😌

All those special stares between both Rick and Michonne throughout their journey really do add a wonderful touch to this love story. 👌🏽🥰

So then Michonne says, “I think you can find a way,” showing her steadfast belief in him. And then I love that she then emphasizes, “We can find a way.” It's refreshingly letting him know that, in navigating all this, he doesn’t have to do it alone. She will be by his side and they're a package deal. 😊

And then, as you know, what makes this scene such a classic is when Michonne flat out expresses the sentiment that they are forever a package deal when she so sincerely says, “And if we don’t…I’m still with you.” BEAUTIFUL. 😭

Oh I adore it with everything in me. She’s communicated to Rick that she’s still with him in so many different ways throughout the series, but I love that here she gets to look right at him with so much love in her eyes and let him know directly that she’s still with him no matter what. Good, bad, or ugly, she will forever be team Rick Grimes. 👌🏽

And it’s huge for her to say this and for Rick to hear this. Finding a home base has been Michonne's big goal this season and Rick's been aiming to provide that home - but now in the finale, this is Michonne’s chance to tell Rick she found home long ago because home actually isn’t a place - it’s him. And he no longer has to worry about losing her.

Also with the uncertainty of their world, how deep is it that they found a nice cushy community, a gold mine in that world, and Michonne is saying I still choose you even over the invaluable safety of having this home. As I’ve said before, this is the season where Rick and Michonne both show through words and actions that they will follow each other anywhere.

It’s so moving for Rick, someone who knows disloyalty well from his previous pre-apocalypse relationships (Lori & Shane), now has this woman to say I’m on your side always. And it's big for Michonne to know that the bond she formed with Rick is one she'll be committed to no matter what. Just a precious sentiment and my favorite thing she’s ever said to Rick so far. 🥰

And the way Michonne is looking at him. 😍 She’s in love with him, can’t tell me any different. So I, of course, gotta give major props to the Danai Gurira too because she also helped sculpt this story in the direction of a love story with the way Michonne would always look and talk to Rick.

Then Rick seems to just be taking her in completely as she says this lovely loyal line. Rick's look here feels like yet another moment that suggests he marvels over how he got so lucky to have someone like her be with him like this.

As Rick and Michonne let a silent moment linger between them, it really felt like RJ’s parents were finally about to kiss in this scene. Cuz these two were practically having this conversation...

Instead, Michonne notes how "something is going to happen," cuz she’s not naive or overly idealistic, and then she wisely states, "just don’t make something happen." And in this moment we’re seeing in real time the way Michonne just expressing herself can impact Rick and motivate him to change course.

I'm sure a lot of characters would have assumed Rick was unreachable in his season 5 era, but Michonne can always so effortlessly reach him and get him to try a new approach.

After she beautifully and prudently expresses this, Rick looks at her mesmerized (the usual), and then hands her the gun again, so eager to offer it as this peace offering that says he is with her too and willing to try to go about this her way rather than fight this his way.

It's a big deal for him to do this and I absolutely love the visual of this whole wordless moment.

I mentioned how in Clear, Michonne hands Rick a bullet as a sort of peace offering to show she’s on his side. And here Rick offers the same with the gun, but I love that instead of taking the gun, the shot draws emphasis on the two’s hands (seriously, Richonne stays giving the most Outstanding Performance by a Pair of Hands 👏🏽) as she softly places a hand over his and signals both that he doesn’t have to give her the gun and that she trusts him to make the right choice with it.

Again, Michonne is the soundest character in TWD, bar none, so in this moment, she knows it’s not necessarily unwise to have the gun, she’s not against the idea of precautions, but she also knows hostility is simply not needed here. And I love the arresting way they can always disarm each other, even without taking a gun.

And the moment just feels genuinely intimate and romantic which I love. Any time they touch it’s sparks. ✨ Michonne's first initiating touch with Rick was outside ASZ in 5.11 and now she does it again in the finale as touching his hand almost reflects her once again hoping that he’s really ready this time to make this place work.

But even if he's not...she's still with him. 🥹

Rick and Michonne then share this palpable passionate look before she heads out, sounding like a wife as she tells him, "Don’t be too long."

And that eye contact tho. 🔥 Richonne's eye contact at the end of this scene alone deserves its own shoutout. 👏🏽

Y’all, let me tell you what we just watched in this scene were some soulmates. Not just besties, or family, or partners - no, this was an exchange between soulmates. That’s their person, their true love, the one they trust unwaveringly - and somewhere in them during this scene, their hearts know it too. Their minds might need to do some catching up, but their hearts know if you ask me.

At the end of this scene, Rick stands alone in the room and holds the gun, moving his hand almost as if it's Michonne's touch that's most lingering with him. It may sound straight out of a romance film to say that, but that really is an element of what this subtle moment is giving.

Seeing that tiny moment of Rick's reaction to the gun in his hand after Michonne's tender touch just confirmed to me that one of the great perks about this ship is we never have to embellish the spark between Richonne because there really are just that many little romantic details to notice and cherish within these scenes.

Rick’s lingering reaction as she leaves also makes it feel like the gun weighs more than it does as it now symbolizes a weighted decision “to use or not to use.” But he knows deep down because the woman he loves has spoken and touched him literally and figuratively, he wants to make his next move one that she could be proud of.

And after a scene as romantically coded as this one, I too don't care what other storyline was supposed to be happening during this time...because Richonne was on the fast track to canon. 1000%.

Like truly after this moment there is no convincing me that Rick was healthily falling for anyone else. The chemistry, attraction, respect, love, and desire are far too evident in this scene between Rick and Michonne to suggest anything other than that canon Richonne is just around the corner. 🔥 And I love that Danai also noted this as a scene that really made it clear Rick and Michonne's bond was bound to blossom into more.

In season 5, who Rick was authentically in love with was crystal clear and who Michonne was authentically in love with was crystal clear. And fortunately, the following season, Rick and Michonne finally took the leap and made it crystal clear to themselves and the world that the two were in love with each other. 🙌🏾

This "I'm still with you" scene was an especially blatant sign that Rick and Michonne had developed an unbreakable love. And this moment is deserving of my #2 spot for how much meaning it carries.

The scene powerfully shows that what Rick and Michonne have between them is and has always been so incredibly deep, influential, reverential, beautiful, steamy, and special - and that no matter what they face or where they go, Rick and Michonne will always and forever be with each other. 🥰

#richonne #top 30 #top 3 #number 2 #rick x michonne #reveling in richonne #the best thing Michonne said to her husband so far 😍#twd 5.16 #twd towl #the ones who live

126 notes · View notes

sbg-loving-pierog · 13 days

Text

Let's talk about The Hernandez Family!

and why the whole situation with Tyler is actually a good thing to happen.

(‼️Spoilers for episodes 43-51‼️)

You've been warned...

Starting off with ep. 43 when we see Mariana Hernandez - Taylor and Tyler's mother - for the first time.

You can see the tension rising when she mentions the twin's father, which at the time is suspicious but since it goes unexplained it doesn't bring much of our attention until

Back then we couldn't confirm what that means, not until ep. 48 and Tyler's flashbacks. Now we know that the twins' father is dead, so that tells us that their mother doesn't seem to remember about that. To say more, she's CONVINCED that he's still alive because even when the situation points to him not being with them anymore, she still only finds it a bit weird but doesn't seem to remember the truth.

Either she doesn't want to remember it, or it's a part of some kind of medical, mental condition, but something that helps keep up this Delusion is that, as we know, after the death of Ethan Hernandez, Tyler took over his responsibilities.

Mariana never had to take over anything her husband did for the family, she didn't feel the weight that fell on them after his passing. All "thanks" to Tyler.

And for some reason her kids try to keep up this facade with distracting her from thinking about their father before she remembers anything

And they succeed, bringing them to the point when they are the ones that take care of her, instead of it being the other way around, as it should. She probably still does her share of responsibilities a parent should have (a part she was doing before too, when Ethan was alive) but the other half AND the mental burden is all on Tyler and Taylor.

But something changes in ep. 51

When Tyler is "injured", her first instinct is to call her husband - and his father - which is understandable, you wouldn't really think logically in a situation like that, but for Mariana, this is when the truth and logic finally hits her

She reminds herself that she can't call Ethan for help and you can clearly see that she's about to panic

But then Taylor comes in, and changes her mother's thinking of "I'm on my own, what do I even do?" To "I have others to care for, I'll think about myself later".

You can almost hear her thoughts saying "You're their mother. Act like it".

This is the moment she realizes that:

1. She can't depend on Ethan anymore

2. Tyler won't always be there to help her

3. She has to be strong for her kids because she should be. Because it's her responsibility that she's been neglecting... or just wasn't able to bring to life for WAY too long

After Tyler wakes up and the group leaves the hospital, it's said that his mom stayed there with him. I think both the time when Taylor needed her support and the time they spent together with Tyler when she was the one caring for him for a change will normalize their family situation. It will help Mariana realize that Tyler was and is still just a kid, and was never ready to take over his father's "position" in caring for her and Taylor, even if he did it because he had to.

That's what I think anyways, I'm open to discussion though ^^ and well, now as they're separated, their relationship will either freeze for a moment, or change again and hopefully it'll become even stronger after another reunion :)

#sbg #sbg (webtoon)#sbg taylor #sbg tyler #sbg mariana #school bus graveyard #taylor hernandez #tyler hernandez #ethan hernandez #mariana hernandez

56 notes · View notes

genericpuff · 9 months

Note

Wait, what's this about the retconning of Minthe's BPD?

There's a lot you can find on it online as it is (I've talked about it plenty in previous posts as well) so I'm gonna try and keep the explanation brief if that's ok!

Basically it was confirmed ages back that Minthe was initially written with BPD, but that was later retconned and removed. While there's no definitive reason as to why she retconned it, I think it's fairly obvious it's because it wasn't a good look for her to write the character with a very stigmatized and severely misunderstood mental illness who would be 1.) an abuser and 2.) inevitably turned into a plant.

But there's still proof of Minthe having BPD evident in S1 of LO, particularly with Episode 76 which was literally called Splitting.

"Splitting" is a very BPD-specific term, in which an individual with BPD experiences severe mood swings, impulsivity, and difficulty in viewing things outside of a black and white perspective. We actually see Minthe experience splitting, hence the episode title, it's all very intentional.

Minthe is viewing this entire problem as her vs. Hades. And it's not entirely owed to her being self-centered, she shows through her inner monologue that she's very self-aware of the fact that she's being harsh, that much of what happened was due to her own actions, and even blames herself for acting the way that she is but not knowing why. This is very much what splitting can feel like for individuals with BPD (especially undiagnosed BPD!) experiencing splitting - an inability to connect inner rationalizations to outward actions and vice versa, even if you're aware of it and trying to draw that connection.

When this was retconned, it was done specifically by Rachel's mods within her Discord. No other clarification through her socials or through the comic itself was done.

It already wasn't a great look to write a character who was doomed to be villainized with a highly stigmatized mental disorder. It comes across that Rachel only gave her BPD in the first place because she herself had fallen for those misconceptions and went "well if we give her BPD that'll be the reason why she's so mean and nasty all the time, it's the perfect way to make her the obvious bad guy!" But it makes it an even worse look when Rachel bent under the pressure of people discussing how problematic it was (and hoping Minthe would get some kind of redemption which Rachel never planned to give her) and reversed the decision. It really only really made it worse because 1.) you can't retcon out what you clearly intended in the beginning when it's so visibly there (such as through Ep 76) and 2.) it just goes to show that she was never planning on giving Minthe any sort of redemption arc or chance to learn from her actions/heal from her mistakes, she just wanted to use a mental illness she didn't bother to understand or empathize with to make an abuser.

It really just further stigmatizes BPD as a whole because now we only see the absolute nastiest parts often affiliated with BPD (with what remains in the comic pre-retcon) with no closure or resolution or hope for people who either have BPD or want to understand it more.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus #ask me anything #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything

168 notes · View notes

ladyluscinia · 6 months

Note

I think they were so worried about not getting a season 3 they ruined both the viewers expecting one and the viewers who would've liked it to end there. they've created an easily destroyable status quo because of course something needs to happen to get everyone back together for season 3. so it's not even a happy ending; it's so fragile, it's designed to fall apart the second that anyone learns that the show is back on. i get not wanting to bank on having a third season and wrapping it up but like. Galavant did that and did it better. WITH THE HEROES RETIRING AND THE TWO MINUTE MARRIAGE CEREMONY TO BOOT. But it gave an outline of where the plot might go from there and how the adventure will continue if it gets to. And it never got to, and season 2's ending is good because it's not /fragile/--it's not a cliffhanger, but you get the idea that they could keep going from there still. whereas this one didn't want to be a cliffhanger so much that they created the most breakable new status quo in history and if there is a season 3 it'll immediately be undone and I'll probably still watch it but like I'll /know/, y'know? They could fix everything in the first episode of season 3 and I'd still have to know that at one point, this was considered an acceptable outcome.

The thing that is driving me absolutely insane is they DID NOT HAVE TO DO THIS!

There's so many people looking at it like "well it's a shame that 2x08 clearly had to cram several episodes into one for budget reasons and it made the development weaker but that's the situation MAX put them in" and I cannot emphasize enough how much that is not true.

MAX did not break it to them after episodes 2x01 - 2x07 were written and half filmed that they would have to wrap up the whole plot in 30 minutes. Like absolute worst case scenario they had 10 eps mostly written and budget came back 20% over and they had to reduce to 8 total. More likely they knew they were getting 8 from the start.

It is absolutely nobody's fuck up except David Jenkins and his writers' room if they were unrealistic about what character beats were needed and would fit in the timeframe to reach a satisfying wrap up.

Worries about no S3 were on the table the moment it took until JUNE to get confirmation of S2. This wasn't sprung on them. If they wanted their story to have a "just in case" happy ending and then a "fully realized arc" happy ending, they should have fucking acted like it???

I was shocked when the first three episodes that dropped were so hardcore on destroying Edward's relationships and laying bare exactly how deep his issues went. It only made sense to me if they were going all in on getting a S3 and prepared to spend all of S2 focused on the implications of all that, and then the not-even two week in-universe timeline of the season reinforced my understanding that was happening.

"Shame we don't have time for our main couple to even start addressing their relationship or having moments of self-realization and sharing their issues," says guy who decided to make the first half of S2 about adding more problems on top of well established ones from S1 and the second half of S2 about throwing in a second breakup cycle instead of dealing with the fallout from the first.

Want Edward to end on a beat of feeling part of the found family? Well maybe adding a timeskip after 2x05 and then a crew chat in 2x06 where you make it clear he did an apology tour offscreen could help, but you also could have just not focused hard on him poisoning his relationship with every single one of them in the first place???

There's multiple different ways you can do Act 2 of a three act structure, and they did not have to choose one that ends on another dark cliffhanger beat or right at the open ended turning point toward growth? Like they didn't even do the one they picked in a way they could fit in their season. I feel like by the end of a struggles Act 2 both your protagonists need to have self-realized their issues and maybe had one conversation about it? Edward still wasn't talking about his guilt, and Stede wasn't talking about anything.

They aren't even at the turning point of growth and out of the backsliding / lessons learned era yet, that's why potential S3 will start on another backslide when status quo breaks and Stede starts "that's nice, dear"-ing Edward during the day and slipping out at night to vicariously listen to pirate stories or whatever (and they frame it like he's cheating).

We have two out of three seasons in a show that might only get two, and I feel like the characters have barely moved from their starting position.

Like idk maybe they are really good at coming up with character flaws - ex: Stede is repressed and bottles up his traumas until he mentally checks out / runs away - and just drawing blanks on how to believably "fix" them, but just going "well what if we just used this flaw to throw another miscommunication roadblock in their relationship?" is not getting them where they want to be.

The season was fundamentally designed against their stated goal and did not make what seem to be necessary writing concessions to the reduced screentime if they wanted their finale to land as an even plausibly happy ending. It's hollow.

And possibly not even salvageable in S3 since they aren't demonstrating the skills to salvage it.

#our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd 2x08 #david jenkins #ask #ladyluscinia #ofmd meta #ofmd critical

142 notes · View notes

hueningshaped · 1 year

Text

★ close to you | k.kh

▰ genre: fluff and some angst if you squint aka it gets a little sad but overall it’s fluffy

▰ word count: 1.9k

▰ synopsis: you aren’t aware you’re in love with your best friend, kai and everyone knows it but you (does kai know? stay tuned!) ft. taehyun

a/n: saw huening sleeping in to do ep #54 and boom. word vomit. sorry for being ia :( i’ve just been so disgustingly busy with school and work i could (and have many many times) cry/ed about it! also sincerest apologies to those who requested and still have received nothing. i’m scum for not having followed through with that ^^ i’ll keep doing my best to accomplish that for u ~ ty for taking the time to read this or anything i ever post. you’re amazing!

You toss and turn restlessly, thoughts on hyperdrive, senses filled and quite honestly overstimulated as you lay beside your best friend, who is fast asleep. Kai twitches a little, comforter bunched up around his chest and he smacks his lips, nose wriggling. You sigh a little under your breath and squeeze your eyes shut, body tense as if you’re doing military training.

The hum of the fridge can be heard all the way in yours and his room, even so the faint acoustics coming from Beomgyu’s nightly routine of needing music to sleep every night; the mechanical life reminds you that you aren’t alone. What does remind you that you’re the only one awake is the lack of organic noise.

It makes sense; why would anyone else stay awake, especially when practice was a bit grueling than anticipated? Their words, not yours.

In the back of your mind, you wonder if Soobin is still up, remembering how he enjoys staying up if he’s watching a drama or playing games, but he’d been the first one to head to bed, so honestly the chances for him to be up were fairly unlikely.

You’re brought back to reality because Kai turns towards you with two little jumps. Every time he exhales, his nose whistles, and you’re doing everything within your power not to turn over and look at him in all his cuteness.

But, you can’t resist; his arm is curled into his chest and he sleeps with a faint smile, his little spider plushie beside his head blends in with the dark of his hair. It seems all so serene and easy: air, noise, sleep, everything — but, you’re sweating so much even if the air con is already on. (Kai knows you sleep better this way.)

Your heart feels as if it’s been plugged into every artery like a speaker, and the bass of your bpm is pulsating and loud. It is unfettered, second to the noise pollution going on in your mind.

Nothing has changed, that’s what makes you think this whole situation is ludicrous. Nothing has happened recently. Every day has been the same. Well, life is still overwhelming at times, but that’s besides this new feeling. It’s additional.

It’s new.

You and Kai Kamal Huening have a history of deep friendship that goes way, way back. These years have involved sleepovers, trips to the store that involve either roaming and buying nothing or buying nearly everything, good food, laughter, and happy memories. It is easily the only thing you’ve ever done right — being his best friend. So, why in God’s name is he affecting you in such an unprecedented way?

It didn’t start out of nowhere, but you couldn’t pinpoint exactly if you tried.

When he laughed and threw his head back, especially at something stupid you said, he made it seem like the most revered thing in the world, and it wasn’t fair because you said a lot of stupid things.

When he felt too shy, sometimes he’d stand behind you and tuck his face into your neck absentmindedly, which is something he has always done, but lately, it made you sweaty and your stomach feel funny.

He has this one smile, you noticed, where his face angles down a bit and he smiles sweetly, that sweet, gentle expression bleeding into his eyes. It’s bashful almost, and sometimes he giggles. He’s been doing that for years, so you haven’t a clue as to why suddenly it was like he did that for the first time and suddenly, he was the most beautiful person to ever exist in humanity.

In the back of your mind, you’ve always thought of your Hyuka as the most beautiful person ever, but every time you think of him now, as of lately, that reminder just can’t seem to go away. It haunts you. His image is inked into infinity on the inside of your eyelids. He’s all you ever think about.

It’s strange.

Besides, all these things you’ve been taking note of, it’s the effect it has been taking on your body. Today, for instance, while you were in your hour long break between your classes at uni, and Huening was at his own work, he texted you lots and begged you to facetime, so you could play a game together.

This wasn’t new, but the invitation suddenly made you flustered, not to mention that you and he had already scheduled a movie night and dinner along with a sleepover.

So, this innocent little request made you panic over what you looked like, which was odd, considering not once did you ever really think about that in the presence of your best friend. He just made you feel that comfortable.

from: you

idk about facetiming, hyuka…….

from: molang

what do u mean ‘idk’ 🥺

from: molang

are u ok? whats going on?

from: molang

i love u <333

/You nearly saw stars with that one — as if he didn’t have a habit of telling you he loved you every night./

from: you

no haha sorry i just had to find a study room so we could chat sorry haha sorry

from: you

love u too though 🫶🥺

Even through text, the amount of stupidity beat off you in waves.

It was hard to come up with any excuse that didn’t fall along the truth, which was that you felt a little self conscious showing your face.

Of course, you obliged, but you did just about everything you could that could prevent making eye contact with him. He didn’t point it out, but that didn’t mean he didn’t notice.

When it came time to hanging out, you were buzzing with sweats and an adrenaline you couldn’t place an epicenter to. Whenever you went to the dorms, you and Kai just chilled beside each other either in his and Taehyun’s room, or in the living room: sometimes watching Tiktoks, cartoons, and sometimes, you just chose to watch the other guys all play a game. Everyone would help out once everyone got hungry, so that also kept you busy.

Today, you were in the room since everyone else was in the middle of a cleaning mood. Kai had insisted you stop by nonetheless; Taehyun had previously done his duties, so you spent some quiet reading time with him.

“You don’t have to hold your breath every time you’re with him, you know?” Taehyun had randomly spoken up in the midst of the quiet—muffled vacuum noises, shouts, mop sloshing this way and that, all in the background behind the closed door.

“Huh?” You blinked up at him, having cooled down completely from the brief cuddling session earlier with Kai.

“I’m just saying to relax. There’s no need to worry when it comes to Hyuka.” Taehyun ended his statement with a little sigh, eyes dropping back to his book.

“Oh, alright.” You said just to let him know you heard him, even though you had no idea why he said that. Taehyun is an observant genius, but you were too lazy (and a little afraid) to ask him what he meant by that. Of course, you didn’t have to worry about your best friend.

The rest of the night played out how it typically went, so nothing was new.

Yet, here you are: still awake and unable to relax, unlike how Taehyun had said earlier.

Taehyun himself is fast asleep, like your friend who is curled up nearly into your side, except that he is engulfed in darkness—considering you and Kai sleep in front of the window. Moonlight bleeds in through the partially open blinds, and it drapes over you two.

It bathes Kai in a light that illuminates his beauty, despite the dark of the night. His chest rises and falls, breaths tumbling out between his beautiful lips gently.

He’s so gentle. So soft. So sweet. So fragrant. Evergreen if he were a tree, but maybe if he were a flower, he’d be a lily of the valley.

Your heart is quaking in your chest as your hand takes aim to your best friend’s shoulder, pushing lightly but in quick patterns, a rhythm enough to wake him, which is your intention.

“Kai?” You shake him and all it does is move him a little, beautiful face still serene and loose. Since when did he get so enamoring? “Huening? H…Hyuka?”

“Hey, Kai, wake up…” He gets jostled a little more, your hand now in a loose fist around the hem of his sleeve. Distantly, your guilt of possibly waking Taehyun slows you down, but at this moment, Kai’s eyes flutter open like a princess, lids heavy as they blink and take you in.

He hums and blinks some more, adjusting to everything from his deep slumber. You feel so guilty your stomach hurts.

“Y/N? Hm?” His voice comes out loudly, but you slap a palm over his mouth, shushing him just as loudly as he’d spoken. The warmth of his breath on your hand makes you sweat a little. Once he sobers a little, his smile makes you drop your hand and as if he knew, he catches it, wrapping around your fingers.

“Sorry,” he chuckles quietly before looking back at you from his position on the bed, whereas you lean on an elbow to gaze down. Kai reaches and takes his other hand to run through your hair, from the furthest to the nearest point of your face. Your cheeks heat up further. “What is it?”

You blink at him, suddenly unsure of why you had even rudely woken him up from his slumber.

“Is everything okay?” He asks softly, starry eyes mirroring his voice.

“Oh, yeah, I’m okay, I just—“

“You can’t sleep?” Kai asks in a hushed tone. He still has your hand in his. You nod.

It’s all coming together in the back of your mind: why you can’t sleep, eat, behave the way you always have, the way you have before you knew the truth—and you don’t want to think about it. Moments like this and everything between you two, which has been the best thing in your tiny, crummy life: you wouldn’t jeopardize it, even for something as silly as your feelings.

You nod, and his smile elongates.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes and your mouth is starting to curve into a frown. He intertwines your fingers now. “How about we watch some anime? Does that sound good?”

Your chest fills with something unfamiliar but somehow it’s a feeling you’ve always known.

You want to cry.

“That sounds great.” You whisper and come back down. This time, you lean your head on his shoulder, body facing into him.

“Let’s use headphones, so we don’t disturb Taehyun hyung,” he reaches a hand to grab at his desired items. “We can watch Cardcaptor Sakura.”

You say nothing the rest of the night, trying to savor this moment of peace, in the dead of the night, of serenity, and do your best to fall into the beat of his heart that beats against your ear in a loving measure. He hands you an earpod, to which he uses the other, and his screen glows with cherry blossom trees and sunshine.

You’re pathetically in love with Kai Kamal Huening.

You pray that this revelation stays in your mind, keeping you friends, keeping you here with him peacefully and happily for a lifetime—totally unbeknownst to the reality of your best friend already sharing those same feelings for you.

Kai smiles to himself once your body sinks fully into the mattress and into him.

It’s a shame, he thinks to himself. Smitten. He’s known it all along. He’ll wait for you to catch up; he’d wait as long as it takes.

#txt imagines #txt x reader #txt scenarios #tomorrow x together imagines #hueningkai x reader #hueningkai imagines #txt fluff #txt angst #hueningkai fluff #hueningkai scenarios #txt reactions

696 notes · View notes

jq37 · 4 months

Text

The Report Card – Fantasy High Junior Year Ep 1

We're SO Back

School is back in session y’all!!!!

Fantasy High has returned to us after a long break and I am thrilled to come out of my recapping hiatus to bring back the Report Card for Junior Year! You know I could let my favorite chaotic high schoolers go un-analyzed!

This episode wastes no time in getting started so neither will I. Brennan makes what I think is a very strong narrative choice by starting us in media res at the end of a classic Bad Kids adventure. It is the summer between Sophomore and Junior Year and the party has spent the last four months hot on the trail of the dreaded Night Yorb.

We catch up to our Intrepid Heroes in the Red Waste and they’re trying to catch up to the Night Yorb which is a big, eldritch, manta ray like monster who threatens to plunge the entire world into darkness, creating a very slow (but still effective!) apocalypse! The Night Yorb is flanked by its groupies, made up of members of the many cults dedicated to it (collectively known as “Yorbies”).

As I said, the Bad Kids are hot on its trail, in (and on) the Hangvan. Gorgug (who has been leaning more into his Artificer vibes lately) has outfitted the top of the Hangvan with a solar lasso that can be used to capture and reel in the Night Yorb so that Fig and Adaine can defeat it with a magical sigil. I’m gonna quickly run down where everyone is and what they’re doing:

Adaine and Fig are both standing on top of the Hangvan in order to spring the sigil when the time comes. Adaine is also joined by Boggy and a new addition, Moggy the Doggy (aka, Mordekainen’s Faithful Hound), which is a very round, very cute, very invisible Pomeranian looking dog.

Gorgug is also up top with them because he’s manning the solar lasso.

Fabian is inside the Hangvan along with Baby (aka Wretchrot, aka Fig’s screeching blood imp who has no mechanical benefit unless she takes another level of Warlock as Brenan keeping reminding us) and Ecaf, a mirror with a sultry voice that Fabian is *heavily* flirting with, much to everyone’s discomfort. It’s tres Narcissus. (Also, ha, Face backwards. I see you Brennan).

Kristen is in the back with Fabian and Riz is driving, even though he is WAY too small to effectively be driving a Gorgug sized van.

The Hangman–Fabian’s trusty motorcycle/hellhound–is out in front of the Hangvan.

Also Squeem is on the roof with the others! Beloved, fan favorite Squeem!

Yeah, so this episode does a thing of pretending like we’re jumping into the last episode of an arc that we’ve seen every episode of and introducing characters in a very Sam Reich, “He’s been there this whole time” way even though it’s their first appearance. I think it’s very funny and it reminds me of that Community episode where they’re all flashing back to episodes that never aired. But anyway, I mention this so that if I mention a name and you’re like “Whomst?” it’s probably just a bit, you’re not forgetting a major character.

Anyway, we’re joining this chase already in progress which means our kids are hurt and down spell slots but their opponents are as well. The distribution is pretty uneven–Adaine is way less hurt than Fabian and Kristen for instance, which honestly checks out (curious how they decided on that though).

Because this episode is just one big battle sequence for the most part, I’m going to follow the precedent I set in the recaps for The Seven and just give the highlights in bullets and then do an analysis on where all the Bad Kids are right now at the end:

Murph comes in hot, using his first action of the new season to shoot his gun and doing 30 points of damage with a 27 to hit. New year, new Murph!

Siobhan invokes the corn cuties debacle from fight one and all the falling off the tables that happened. Clearly, a bit of Adaine’s oracle energy is rubbing off on her because the next thing that happens in that Fabian decides to jump on top of the Hangvan to cast Faerie Fire on the Night Yorb (which has shrouded itself in magical darkness), rolls the first Nat 1 of the season, absolutely eats it, and gets run over by Riz–narrowly avoiding going down. He’s ultimately fine–The Hangman comes and picks him up–but it’s not a very auspicious star from Master Fabian.

Emily and Murph have a cute moment of womping Brennan back to back by using Silvery Barbs to make him reroll two attacks on the Hangvan–one of which is a crit–and then giving each other the advantage on the next roll.

Kristen is a real pillar in this encounter–holding up the Circle of Power spell that allows her friends to ignore big chunks of damage that absolutely would have dropped them. But throughout the entire fight, her patron goddess, Cassandra, keeps trying to talk to her and Kristen keeps leaving her on read–we’ll get more into that in a bit.

Adaine comes in clutch with a Nat 1 portent roll to stop the NIght Yorb from resisting Gorgug’s attempt to reel it in further. Truly, the best time to roll a Nat 1 in this game. Divination Wizards are awesome!

We learn that “Don’t Speak of the Night Yorb” is more than just a silly bit when Fig realizes that saying its name makes it heal up which isn’t great because they’ve been *very* cavalier about invoking its name.

Squeem gets a big emotional goodbye with Gorgug on top of the Hangvan, heroically leaps off to fend off some Yorbies…and then rolls a 2 and totally faceplants. No! Squeem! Beloved fan favorite Squeem! They already had to revivify you once!

On the Night Yorb’s turn, Brennan does an attack and shakes so many dice that it sounds like maracas. It’s 61 points of damage and squishy wizard Adaine goes down, but everyone else stays up–large in part due to Kristen’s aforementioned Circle of Power. (Siobhan, describing how bad her saving rolls were zings two separate friends saying, “It was Fabian level nasty. I fucking Murph’d it.”)

Luckily, Fig and Gorgug are up on the roof with Adaine so she does not go sliding off the van when she goes down. They catch her before she can fall.

At this point the Van has sustained a lot of damage so Murph reminds the teacher that they have homework/Brennan that they have to roll for a mishap. That turns out to be the breaks blowing out. Now, all the Van can do is accelerate! It’s just like the movie Speed!

Two more characters who we totally know and have been here this whole time show up to help–Balthazar and Duggan McCann! A cool grizzled veteran and a centaur cowboy. Riz immediately starts doing cool guy banter with them because he’s somehow convinced them that he’s cool (which he is for the record, just in a completely different way lol). Unfortch, Baz almost right away gets eaten by the NIght Yorb. Who’s gonna take care of his litter (?) of parrots?????

At this point in the fight, everyone gets a ping on their crystals, reminding them that school starts in three days. This stresses everyone out more than the fight that they’re currently in.

Fig brings up Adaine with a Healing Word but she immediately has to do Wis save with the rest of the party. She and Fabian fail, but once again Fabian is saved by fear negating effects of his dad’s eyepatch. So Adaine starts to have a panic attack about the fact that she’s fighting the Night Yorb while standing on the roof of a moving vehicle which, real talk, very normal and valid reaction. In fact, probably concerning that she’s reached a point in her life where that *isn’t* the default reaction.

The Hangvan is coming up on a jump it’ll have to make to continue following the Night Yorb (and it can’t even try to stop because the brakes are cut). Riz fails the roll which means that the van is probably going to fall on its side. Adding insult to injury, a pillar of rock falls and is going to crash into the van, doing even more major damage.

Fig watches this, and almost dissociates, feeling the weight of the entire summer taken from them to do this quest. Feeling so so tired. Feeling the fact that even if they win, they’re just gonna have to go back to school and adventure some more. A piece of magic she’s been holding inside of for a long time flickers and she hears an enticing voice whisper in her ears. “If you would take me, you know what you would save.” She smells a sour, curdled scent and she knows that if she says yes, she can save her friends. Maybe there’s another way, but she just wants this to be over. “I’m yours,” Fig says.

There’s a flash of “lemony, yellow, creamy” light (hmmmm) and the rock stops falling. The Hangvan starts righting itself.

And then there’s a sick gurgle from Fig’s stomach.

Uh-oh, gang.

For those of you who are new to these recaps, every week, I give one PC Detention and put one on the Honor Roll for their in-game actions. We’re starting off hot this semester with:

Detention

Kristen Applebees for Being a BAD Friend to Cassandra

Like, OK. Faith is complicated. Kristen’s relationship with religion is complicated. Being a cleric is complicated. But notice that I didn’t say being a bad *cleric*. I said being a bad *friend*. To be clear, she’s also being a bad cleric, and I’ll talk about that later. But having understandably conflicted views on religion doesn’t make sliding in your Fantasy Airpods while the being who is essentially a lonely teen girl and who is keeping you and all your friends alive tries to talk to you NOT seem like a giant dick move. Come on girl, get it together.

Honor Roll

Brennan Lee Mulligan for Being a Great DM!

I realized as I was writing this that I’ve given Brennan Detention but never Honor Roll so he’s getting it today. It feels so good to have him back in the dome with the kids and he drew me back into the world, right away. I’m so psyched that we have a full season of this ahead of us!

CHARACTER CHECK-INS

Like I said earlier, because this is the first episode back, I want to really quickly check in with all of the Bad Kids and where they are, character-wise. I’m going to do this roughly from least concerning to me to most concerning to me.

-Adaine: Adaine seems like she’s living her best life. She has her frog! She has her dog! Her character art is so much more chill and she’s coming into her own. This season, I’m hoping we get to see more of her relationship with her sister (yes, I’m a predictable bitch. Sue me) and with Zayn (who is also living at Mordred in her tower) who I think has a lot of potential to be an interesting supporting character with more spotlight. But yeah, go Adaine!

-Gorgug: Gorgug is making his parents proud (not that they ever weren’t) by taking another artificer level. He’s not a 7/3 Barb/Art split. I love that he’s gone from calling himself dumb to taking on this very technical skill. He also apparently has a homunculus? Fascinated to see what that looks like.

-Riz: Now that his big investigation is over and he knows his dad is a cool secret agent, Riz has switched his subclass from Inquisitor to Arcane Trickster which means he’s got tons of gadgets and that he’s a ring guy now. Love that for him. He’s very much not a chill person though so I’m very curious to know what the next thing he’ll latch onto is. He the kind of guy who always need something going on, you know?

-Fabian: Fabian is a fancy, dance boy now (6/4 Fighter/Bard)! But that doesn’t mean he’s any less athletic. I mean, have you ever seen a male ballerina? He still is, however, a total disaster. And I mean that affectionately. I mean, his current love interest (?) is a mirror that is showing a fuzzy reflection of his own face. My guy, what are you doing? Although I will say, idk if that’s more or less toxic than him dating Aelwyn.

-Kristen: Kristen. GIRL.

OK, so first of all. There is nothing inherently wrong with getting super jacked and like, respect. But in this context it feels like a red flag. Like the kind of thing you do because you’re on the rocks with your girlfriend or if you’ve recently broken up. I will be *very* interested to know what Tracker is up to as she’d not mentioned in this episode. Last we heard, she was out doing cleric stuff for the Moon Goddess, right? Long distance can be hell on a relationship. (Also, idk how seriously we’re supposed to take this but Ally mentioned the one shot it happened in in this episode so Kristen was also totally trying to flirt with a college girl in that college visit oneshot. Brennan shut it down pretty quick, but it very much did happen).

Also, speaking of cleric stuff, Cass. I feel SO bad for Cass. Like, a god isn’t owed followers, but Kristen chose that role. She CHOSE it. This isn’t like a Helio situation. Cass wasn’t pushy. She specifically says in this episode that she doesn’t want to be pushy. Hell, she says in the episode where she’s introduced that if people don’t want her around she’ll go away. But Kristen chose to be her follower, knowing what the implications of being the sole follower of a goddess is. Cass is made in her image. That’s how deeply entwined they are. Her goddess is made in her image. In The Seven, we learn that Ost’s god hasn’t talked to anyone in years. Kristen has Cass coming in like a mom offering snacks mid battle and Kristen is leaving her on read! It’s honestly kinda hard to watch her be so blithely dismissive of someone so dependent on her even though it’s played off as kind of a joke. I felt like I was watching a loyal puppy get kicked every time they interacted.

And like, I said this before, Cassandra is made in Kristen’s image. But specifically, she looks like Sophomore year Kristen. Still all skinny and still in her tie-die shirt and shorts. There is a definite vibe of almost wanting to kill the part of yourself that embarasses you, you know? It feels like she's being mean to Cass but also to herself.

Also, mechanically speaking, it’s wild to be just ignoring the person you’re getting your powers from like this. Like, this is real Wizard behavior. You don’t have to answer to anyone if you studied for your magic but you absolutely do as a cleric. Does Kristen even want to be a cleric? It honestly doesn’t seem like it. She’s shown a pattern of behavior of chafing at every god put in her path, even the ones she literally made up. I thought Cass might be the end of her searching, but we’re right back on the Merry Go Round. The party absolutely needs a healer though so idk how she deals with that.

I saw the snipped clip of Ally’s interview about Kristen’s arc this season involving what happens when chaos stops being cute, and I can def see seeds being planted. Fascinated to see how they explore that because this feels like a real ticking time bomb of a situation.

Oh also, her Dex went DOWN????? GIRL!

Fig: I had a lot more to say about Kristen but Fig has to be last on the list for making a deal with a literal devil lol. Like, classic Fig though, right? This WOULD happen. Emily talked about potentially retiring Fig and getting reeled in by some enticing plot hook from Brennan and it feels like we might be about to find out what that is. I won’t speculate on it too much right now because we’re presumably about to find out but there were a LOT of yogurt themed adjectives when that magic activated which has me very split on whether this is about to be deeply concerning or deeply silly. Or both! It could be both!

Random Thoughts

I LOVE that we have a proper theme song now. It feels so fitting and I love the opening art and it’s all so cool. The show’s so profesh now!

Also, shout out to @caitmayart for making the new art! It has the quality of a professional and the extra love of a fan. It’s my fave D20 official art so far.

I don’t know when this feature was added but I love that there is a full transcript you can pull up and search and jump to that time in the video now. That’s gonna be SO useful for me.

One of my favorite things about Adaine is that she’s generally polite but occasionally she’ll just absolutely verbally decimate someone so casually and this episode she said to the Solesian Yorbie they encountered, “What movie theater were you assistant managing before you decided to become a Yorbie?” Brutal.

Also love how vehement she was about the fact that Brennan couldn’t touch Moggy, even when she went down. You are absolutely NOT gonna kill that dog Brennan.

“Object interaction, touch Gorgug’s foot.”

Fig asks Gorgug how they can heal a van and he says, “Take it to a shop for 3-4 days.” Zac, underrated comic genius.

I really can’t overstate how funny it is that Fabian spends most of this episode flirting with his own reflection. I’ve said this many times but something I love about Lou is that he’s not afraid to make Fabian deeply uncool, even though Fabian’s whole thing is being as cool as possible.

Kristen says she needs to have an intense conversation with Cassandra when the fight is over and what does that mean? Like a breakup conversation? Which I guess would kill her because then she’d have no followers again? I am, como se dice, concerned.

Also, just looking ahead, Tracker is also a cleric. A pretty faithful one from what I can tell. I have to wonder what her take on Kristen completely neglecting her goddess and church is.

I think it’s so funny that Emily was thinking about retiring Fig so she could just ride off into the sunset with her cool rockstar life and awesome girlfriend because Riz’s big thing last year was being worried all his friend would pair up and leave him so for him to accept it and then have his fears validated right away would be like, welp.

At a certain point, Murph has to roll damage and he rolls 45 out of a possible 50 damage. That’s crazy. Let’s see how long that luck holds.

#Dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #d20 #d20 spoilers #fantasy high #fantasy high spoilers #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #spoilers #the report card

96 notes · View notes