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#because i know exactly the context; exactly what they mean when they say things and how characters are affected by circumstace
rafesfavgirl · 2 days
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i just want to know — r. cameron
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another sad one bc i apparently don't know when to stop lol
❝ you didn't measure up in any measure of a man and i don't even want you back,  i just want to know ❞
pairing: ex-situationship!rafe x fem!reader
context: on the night of your 21st birthday, you run into rafe cameron—the boy who broke your heart.
words: 1.3k+
warnings: mentions of a toxic situationship, drunk!reader, word vomit, alcohol use, cigarette use, might make you cry, so much ANGST
you tumble out of the bar, your vision getting hazy from the amount of alcohol you'd drank, when two hands reach out to steady you.
"woah there, doll," the familiar drawl of his voice catches your attention, the alcohol haze fading for just a second as your eyes meet his.
rafe cameron.
"those are bad for you, you know," you point at the unlit cigarette hanging from the side of his mouth and he narrows his eyes at you, amused at your drunken state.
"and alcohol's not good for you either, but that didn't stop you, did it?" he kinks an eyebrow and you giggle.
"touché," you nod once and slip out of his arms to walk along the sidewalk, before slipping down against the brick wall of the bar to sit down on the concrete.
"alright, what are you doing?" rafe walks over to you when you begin unstrapping your heels from your feet.
"these shoes have been killing me all night," you complain, letting out a sigh of relief and tossing them off to the side.
"then why do you wear them?" rafe asks, taking a seat beside you.
"because they make my legs look hot," you say, causing him to chuckle.
he couldn't exactly argue. when the two of you used to go out, your legs were one of his favorite things about you—especially the way they looked wrapped around his waist.
"where are your friends, doll?" rafe takes the cigarette out of his mouth and shoves it into his pocket.
"don't know," you shrug. "making out with some guys, maybe?"
"and why aren't you?" he asks. "isn't it your birthday?"
that makes you snap your head towards him. "are you stalking me?"
"i-"
"i'm just kidding," you playfully hit his arm and giggle, causing him to shake his head at you, amused. "and to answer your question, i prefer to be single."
"oh?" his eyebrows raise, his blue irises boring into yours. "and why's that?"
"it keeps me focused," you say, pointing a finger at your forehead.
"focused on what?"
"school, college, my career…" you begin listing things off, and rafe listens intently. "i wanna be a doctor, you know. can't be out and about dating guys and getting my heartbroken."
"just 'cause you meet a guy in a bar doesn't mean you gotta date 'em," he reminds you. "don't you wanna have fun?"
"i tried that already, remember?" you allude to the situation you'd put yourself in with him a year ago, the alcohol clearly clouding your judgment—you'd never bring that up to him sober. "it didn't work out quite how i wanted it to."
a sigh falls from his lips, as he glances down. "y/n…"
"hey, can i ask you something?" you cut him off, and he picks his head up to look at you again.
"are you in the state to ask me something?"
"probably not," you shake your head, a smile on your lips. "but i probably won't get the chance to ask again."
"alright, shoot," he nodded.
you tilt your head to the side, eyes locking with his. "why did you end it?"
by the way his shoulders shift and his posture straightens, it was clear he wasn't expecting that to be the question. he always thought it ended amicably because you both agreed to it—or maybe that's just what he's told himself to prevent himself from feeling bad for breaking your heart.
"i mean, was it me?" you continue when he doesn't answer. "did i do something wrong? was i not experienced enough? did you just feel bad for me? what was it? cause i've driven myself crazy trying to figure it out and i just— i thought we were having fun."
you knew that you'd began to ramble, questions slipping out of your mouth with no filter, the alcohol winning over.
his eyes scan over your face, which looked to be in agony, your eyebrows scrunched and your eyes pleading.
"we were," he nods. "y/n, it never had anything to do with you."
"then why?" you asked, voice cracking.
the alcohol was now making you emotional, and there was no stopping it.
"why did you end it, rafe?" you poke a finger at his chest. "i thought you liked me."
"i did," he said, hand reaching up to push a piece of your back. "oh, pretty girl, i did."
his touch lingers for a second before it's gone again, and your eyes are welling up with tears.
"then why were there always other girls?" you ask, surprising him—he didn't know you knew about them. "if you liked me, why was there always someone else? why were you always with someone else when you weren't with me? why wasn't i enough for you?"
"i— i didn't think you knew about them," he admits.
"i pretended not to," you shrug, sniffling. "thought if i said something, i'd lose you. i mean, it's not like we were dating, y'know? i wasn't your girlfriend— it wasn't my place to tell you not to be with other girls. i just thought that if i'd stuck around long enough you'd realize that—" you stop and shake your head. "you know what, it doesn't even matter. it's not like it's gonna change anything."
well now, he felt like shit. you'd played it off so well when it ended—or maybe he was just too high to notice—but seeing you like this… he'd be lying to himself if he said it didn't break his heart.  "i didn't know you cared that much."
"well, now you do," you tell him, before pushing off the ground to stand up. "and if you'll excuse me, i'm not really in the party mood anymore, so if you see my friends, tell them i left."
"y/n, wait," rafe scrambles to his feet, his hand reaching out to clasp around your wrist to stop you from walking away.
"what?" you turn to look at him, defeated. this wasn't exactly how you expected the night of your 21st birthday to pan out.
"i'm sorry, a'ight?" he drops his hand from your wrist, shoulders shrugging as his sad eyes met yours. "i never wanted to hurt you, i just— i wasn't ready."
"and that was fine," you tell him. "but you should've told me that. not pretended like you were taking me seriously when you weren't. i asked you so many times, rafe. and you lied, every time."
rafe sighs, hand motioning to you. "you were just so pure. perfect. i didn't have it in me to hurt you."
you scoff, head shaking as you eyes averted to the side. "doesn't mean you didn't."
"i know, i know," he closes the distance between you, taking both your hands in his. "and there is not a day that goes by where i don't kick myself for how horribly i treated you."
well, this was definitely news to you. when he called things off with you, claiming that it'd be too hard because you were going off to college and meeting new people, he made it look so easy. the words rolled off his tongue as if he'd said it a thousand times before. while you were falling for him, you were just another girl.
"i am so sorry," he says, eyes zoned in on yours. "the last thing i wanted was for you to feel as if you weren't enough for me. if anything, you were too much. and i mean that in a good way. i was too much of an idiot to see how special you were then."
though you'd waited for him to say those words the last six months, they didn't mean much to you now. you'd already come to terms with the fact that he just wasn't the one—hearing him say this now only provides you the closure you so desperately needed to move on for good.
"god," he brings a hand up to caress your cheek, and for just a second, you let yourself lean into it. "some guy is gonna be lucky as hell to get you one day."
"that guy just isn't you."
a small, sad smile forms on his lips, but he nods. "happy birthday."
y'all i think this one triggered something in me bc why tf am i crying rn 🌝
promise i'll start working on some cuter fics that aren't so heartbreaking!!!
reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated <33
click here to be added to my tag list!!
tags: @chiaraanatra @ijustwanttoreadlols @wearemadeofstardust0 @rafesgiirl @solanathascientst @10ava01 @werewhatkilledthedinosaurs @emotionsmgcbabe @outerbankspov @letmeintourheart @gublerstylesobrien1238 @deadgirlwalkingirl @my-fabulousness-has-arrived @jul1ettt @ihe4rttwd @samkickikc @ramblingsofadramastudent @maibelitaaura @vilentia
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cheeseceli · 3 days
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When you're rejected by your crush
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Pairing: BTS ot7 × Gn!Reader (individually)
Genre: fluff, headcanons, just a bit of angst because you were rejected
Request: Hello! Can you please write headcanons for BTS (they have a crush on the reader) reacting to the reader being sad after finding out that her crush (a coworker or a friend) is in a relationship with someone else?
Warnings: none?
A/n: this was inspired by the "secret crush" series by @7ndipity a bit. If you do not allow this, please let me know and I'll delete this post right away!
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Jin
Your friend
That's all Jin wants to be for you right now
Of course, he'd be lying if he said he didn't feel at least an ounce of hope when you said that your friend, your crush, was now dating someone else
But at the same time, he'd hate to show interest in you when you're so vulnerable
So he settles in being only what you need right now: a shoulder to cry on
I believe he'd be the one to wait the longest to tell you how he feels, scared you're not on the same page just yet
Suga
His mind is a mess right now
Nothing breaks him more than seeing your eyes without its usual shine
But he had been praying for the day where you fall out of love with your co-worker
So he really doesn't know how to react right now
He chooses to listen to you talk about how you found out everything and about how you're feeling
Will try to forget his feelings and focus on being the best friend you could ask for now
But as soon as you feel better and your feelings for your past crush start to fade, he might try to make subtle moves on you, scared someone else could catch your attention again
J-hope
I see this going on a slightly different way
He found out about your crush's relationship before you
He just knew you'd be heartbroken
So he tries to let you down gently, saying that maybe the guy wasn't this big of a deal
But when the time comes and you're inevitably sad after finding out, he tries to comfort you as much as possible
Is very hesitant on being flirty right now though
Besides being sad, he'd hate for you to be confused because of him
Namjoon
Honestly, for a second he even forgot he liked you
His mind went blank the moment you texted him about how you were in need of comfort right now
Will fulfill his role as your friend and, before you even notice, you were already laughing through your tears at something he said
Just later that day that he realises what this can mean for your relationship
He finally had a chance now!
Waits for a while though, planning exactly what he wants to do
Jimin
He feels so bloody guilty and selfish right now
Because he's your friend! And you're sad right now!
He should be only focusing on how to make you happy again
But knowing that this means you'll have to eventually move on from your current crush just gives him so much hope
Obviously, he will try to hype you up
But as soon as he can, he will try to make you see him in a different light
Taehyung
Relief floods over him the moment you tell him the news
He was so scared of what could've happened if your crush were to reciprocate your feelings
He had to hold back his smile
Hangs out with you immediately to try to make you forget things for a while
Is already making a plan on how to confess
But for now he's focused on making you feel better
Even thanks your crush with literally no context at all
Jungkook
Deadass smiled when you told him about the situation 💀
Don't get him wrong, he's not happy because you're hurt!
He's happy because he might have a chance now
But he at least was able to hide (part of) his happiness in front of you lmao
And now he's 100% dedicated to make you smile again
He wasn't even that cool, you could find someone better than him anyways
Either way, he makes it his personal mission to distract you from that other guy and make you realise that maybe you're better off without him
And if he ends up being extra boyfriend material throughout it, it was purely a coincidence
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Masterlist | you'll probably like: secret crush (by the author I mentioned in the a/n)
Thank you for reading <3
Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans
Credits for images 1 , 2 and 3
Dividers by @cafekitsune
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imdead770 · 3 days
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anything for Luke and a daughter of hecate, ANYTHING FOR THEM......
had to do my research for this one
for context Hecate is the goddess of witchcraft, magic, ghosts, stuff like that. There's probably more but that's what I got from my one minute google search
I kept this kind of fluffy because I wanted to switch it up, I hope that's okay! If you want smut feel free to request again 🩷
Enjoy!
Luke didn't known much about your mother, most people didn't. She was one of the smaller goddesses. Well, not small, she just wasn't as well known as Athena or Aphrodite. He had heard her name a few times around camp, not thinking much of it. He didn't pay much attention to the name until he realized your own name was associated with it. Whenever you came to camp, eventually getting claimed by Hecate, he started to do his research. He started listening if one of the counselors talked about her or reading more thoroughly if he saw her name in a book. He wanted to learn more about her for one reason; to get closer to you.
Once he learned more about her, he started seeing the resemblances between the two of you. Your long, silky dark hair was exactly how some book described your mother, as well as your overall beauty. If Hecate hadn't of claimed you, it probably would have been Aphrodite. It also made sense why you and some of the Hades' kids were close, you were all connected to the dead. Another thing that made you alike, you were magical. Something about you almost made him feel as if he was put under some sort of spell. Every time you walked into a room, smiling and laughing, it was as if you enchanted him. Every time he was the cause of your laughter, he would melt, almost as if you had cursed him to fall in love with you.
He didn't know how, but your godly parent eventually came up in a conversation. And God's had he prepared for this moment.
"Yeah, she can control ghosts and magic n' all that, right?"
All of that research was worth it. The way you looked at him, your face holding one of your signature, beautiful smiles.
"Yeah... she can. How'd you know that?"
"Uh... I dunno, I've just always found her interesting."
He managed to get out that excuse, you seemed to believe it. Your smile only grew, sending butterflies into his stomach again.
As the two of you kept talking, your mother fading away and the conversation becoming more natural, he was all smiles. He was smiling for a few reasons. One being that he was proud of himself for being productive and learning about your mother. The main reason, though, was you. How your lips moved when you talked, your sing-songy voice leaving them as you joked around with him. He hadn't realized he was starring until you pointed it out.
"Luke? Are you okay? You're like zoning out or something."
"Hm?"
He forced himself to look away from your gorgeous smile, meeting your eyes. They looked stunning. The light hit them perfectly, giving them a magical glow as if your mother was casting a spell from Olympus. As if she and Aphrodite were cursing him to fall head over heels in love and not have a single say in it. Once again he was zoning out, gazing into your eyes like a lovestruck fool. He could've mustered up another excuse if he kept his mouth shut. That only confirmed his theory of being cursed.
"You have really pretty eyes, yknow.."
Shit. He didn't even mean to say that, the words just left his lips. Your mother must've hated him. He wanted to go and dive off the dock and never come back up for air. He was about to go do so until you spoke again.
"Yeah..?"
Since he had been looking down like a flustered idiot, he hadn't noticed the way your smile grew after his words. He hadn't noticed the way your eyes lit up, nor the way you were blushing yourself. Not as badly as him, but you were still blushing.
"..Yeah."
He looked back up to meet your eyes again, finally noticing how your smile became a grin. He couldn't help but mimic the expression, it was infectious.
He didn't notice how you had scooted closer, bit he did notice how you leaned in. He noticed how your beautiful eyes softly closed, and he especially noticed how your lips met his. It all happened so fast, but Gods.. it was magical.
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witheredsnow · 2 days
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My first blogged short story awhile ago that I just thought of posting to... Idk. I guess to relieve myself of some things by turning it into embellished fiction. It was more well-received than I thought. Now this is the third. Thanks for reading. -Rei
It's Not the Same, a short story on an aroace POV
Sunny mornings, cool windy breezes and the sparse green. That was what most days were like with you, my dearest friend.
Sprawled on the ground of your small yard. Green was hard to come by sadly.
We were both young and lived like the world was a fantasy.
Although, I wished I could be in a better fantasy. With you, of course.
A cottage in the woods, surrounded by green, yellows, blues, pinks and violets. Even young, I wanted an idyllic life.
Wouldn't that be a great fantasy.
And I told you about it. Would you want to be there with me too? When we're both older and have to live in reality, let's have this piece of fantasy. Together.
Oh how happy my words made you look. Sparkly eyed youth with red tinted cheeks.
Then you held out your pinky... Oh, right. Of course I would promise.
I want to be with you even years later. And I know you feel the same way as you told me too.
...
.....
But perhaps, it wasn't exactly the same way.
...
We grew older into bigger kids though still kids and still the closest of bonds there is.
Adults say we look cute together as we continue to grow older. Mmm... I mean, I suppose? Individually we look cute, so together we're cuter. I think I understand the logic.
Or maybe I misunderstood.
... I don't know.
Hm? You seem more timid when they say that.
Everyone looked on with a knowing smile or glance.
I... Really don't understand.
...
....
And sometimes I wished I continued to stay ignorant.
But that would be unfair to you, no?
...
Getting even older. It wasn't that exciting to me, in all honesty.
I think I'm starting to get into the reality of growing older... Not that fun. Oh, how I daydreamed of our childhood fantasies when I'm bored.
I never gave up on that dream as I continue to dream it night and day. Do you still remember?
Of course you do. You would encourage and support me too. I know I will want you to be there with me.
You know, that was what I was most looking forward to in getting older. To be with you in that fantasy like I've told you many years ago.
You smiled softly at the declaration I said out loud.
Although, these days... I don't think it'll be just as I wanted. I... Don't know what it is. I don't know where is it not what I wanted.
...
....
But later, I know what it was.
....
Huh? Pardon? What did you say?
My mind stopped working. Or rather, it was working but it was working to block out the words I don't understand why I was denying. Did that make sense?
Hm... Anyway, erm, I understand what you said that you were feeling. Towards me to be exact. And I understand the context of said feelings...
Maybe I did a while ago...
If I said I don't feel the same way or rather, I never will feel the same and I never did feel the same... No, that's not an 'if'. I should say it and I did.
The eyes that looked at me fondly and with growing attraction I chose to ignore when I became aware of its nature now looked hurt. Because I hurt you with this truth.
You thought I felt the same. That I liked you... Or possibly even loved you.
And I did and still do. But... It wasn't ever the same way as you. It took me long to be aware of that.
I... I'm sorry.
...
.....
It wasn't the same ever since that day and I sometimes grieved because of that fact.
So this is reality for us, huh.
....
You looked great together.
I said that as I attended your wedding. Now those words are truly fitting.
You smiled a small smile as I did the same.
It really wasn't the same anymore. But that's not always a bad thing. If it meant that I could see you smile again and have your heart be reciprocated the same way, then it definitely isn't now.
You're still my dearest friend... No matter what.
...
.....
"Hey... So house—or rather, cottagewarming party soon?"
"Yeah. Don't be late."
...
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finexbright · 1 year
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designernishiki · 8 months
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You asked for a fic rec so I’ll toss this one at ya: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46767358?view_full_work=true Stick through the formatting for the characterization, tone, and really the whole vibe of this fic. I haven’t been able to get the bathroom call between Daigo and Majima out of my head for weeks since I read it with how naturally it all flows. My own little Daigo characterization booklet to review when I feel like I need a refresher on him.
so I may have stayed up until 6am reading this (would’ve slept earlier but I couldn’t stop reading it) and hgggahaghhhhaggahshhhhhhhh that was one of the most well-characterized fics I’ve ever read what the fuck. like the differences in how each character speaks (both tone-wise and in differing levels of authenticity) and how they speak to specific others (the daigo and majima dyanmic specifically- how they actually take into account how long they’ve been working really closely- SO good), the mental anguish and chaos vs the overwhelming emptiness of being daigo dojima but no longer The 6th Chairman Daigo Dojima……….I could keep going but I think you get it.
tbh I’d been wanting to write something exploring a similar set of dynamics/situation (post-kiryu’s fake death, interactions with haruka, daigo, and/or majima specifically, reflecting on his shortcomings while acknowledging the heavy Grief left behind) but now I’m like. well I still could but this was so well written in regards to daigo and haruka that, as far as something between those two goes, I don’t feel the need to.
thanks for the recommendation! my brain is broken now (affectionate)
#rambling#fics#fic rec#there’s a little bit of minedai in there via flashback but I don’t know if im gonna put this in my minedai tag cause it’s really#not tecccchnically a minedai fic. it’s just. a daigo-centric fic/study more than anything#my favorite more lighthearted moment in this story is daigo talking to haruka in Okinawa after like 3 years and hearing about her#‘situationship’ with yuta and how it’s just more convenient to tell people they’re a legit couple and daigo’s immediate response on impulse#is just. ‘that must be nice. I mean that you can do that. if it were two guys or two girls or something you wouldn’t be able to do that.’#or something like that and simultaneously sweating because he has no fucking idea why he’s saying that and can’t find a way to abort#my only critique is that I was hoping he’d come out to her (probably on the scene after that where it’s just them sitting on the deck)#and it wouldn’t even have to be a Big Thing it’s just. it felt like it was leading up to that (whether coming out on purpose or on accident)#but ah well#don’t get me wrong I think she could probably figure it out on her own based on the fact that daigo’s never had a girlfriend to her#knowledge and is in his 40s + that weird little gay tangent he went on earlier out of the blue#if anyone could pick it up though context clues and hints it’d be haruka and akiyama The Investigators. and oh no. looks like that’s#exactly who he’s stuck with#id love to see an update cause of this oh mannnn#(if anyone could pick it up it’d be those two + also majima but I kinda figured at this point majima would almost certainly already know#they seem like they have a mutual (possibly unspoken) recognition of one another on that front. based a little on what daigo says about#‘when kiryu says jump you say how high’ and majima floundering a little before admitting ‘you know I can’t resist those big#brown puppydog eyes…’ like i know that’s not too on the nose but it’s enough of a casual acknowledgement to Me that it feels… idk it just#feels like they Know. it just makes sense. and I hope they do cause it’d feel a little less lonely and terrifying to be gay in that world if#that were the case. yet another thing making it feel like majima’s a way more viable parent figure to him than kiryu fr fr……#anyway I could keep going forever so I should probably stop#I’ve never considered how daigo would interact with akiyama and now they’ve got me intrigued. I really hope they update this with something#daigo#I really think a chunk of this fanbase (particularly The Queers) understand daigo as a character better than rgg studio does. and cares more
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munamania · 6 months
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something that makes me feel guilty is the fact that seeing that persons face rn literally makes me angry. they walked into class and i nearly winced. and in all fairness they were quite kind to me. outside of the several kind of odd red flags. girl whatever. to be quite frank i am a horny bastard and vocal proud etc but few people interest me enough to actually want to hang out with and get to know And i have deep seated intimacy issues so it's like. we really dont have a shot unless the circumstances r exactly right on a full moon perfect thursday of a month etc like. well and tbh i probably would have fucked around with this person but i dont... care... about some big relationship w them.. and i know i could be a relationship girl like eventually i have it in me to have a muse that's what im built for i think idc but not rn... rn i need to hang out with my friends and do my film stuff and have people that maybe wanna make out sometimes is that so much to ask for. for a lesbian at a bar to want to make out perhaps. ** for there to be lesbians at the bars to potentially make out with.
#and i am quite lonely yes thank u for asking. yeah someday id love to get to know someone again in the context of falling in love#what about it. so what now. i dont think im meant for our understanding of romantic love but boy do i crave it#why am i having this moment rn. well ok consider im on my period all i could think about this morning was [redacted] and both parties#of my dyke drama were back in class today. and the one gay person that i think has a crush on me but we dont see each other super often#so im just. guessing based on the way awkward lesbians communicate. idk#and i feel really just mean but i quite literally dont have it in me to pretend to be nice to this person anymore#i wasnt like. some villain for realizing we were acting really coupley and being like oh shit because i didnt want to hurt them#. and trying to communicate and put some distance between us when i thought they were probably in too deep. it's unfortch it took me a sec#but jesus christ yk i cant walk around and feel awkward about it forever. and im frustrated by the fact that we're just acting so odd#but again frankly i think it's largely bc they have an unhealthy relationship with dating. THROWING HORIZONTAL PUNCHES HERE.#OK. STONES FROM A GLASS HOUSE. IM AWARE. REAL RECOGNIZES REAL.#and YET. despite my past insanity. ive been kind. i can understand disappointment and a little awkwardness#but jesus would you rather i pretend to be in love with you for months and then really break your heart.#this is where i get mean and make a joke like well hey if we couldve had weird really mediocre sad angry dyke sex abt it#that would have been cool with me. but alas. we're here instead and it's fucking with my friendships too#and like we were kind of ok friends too. what now. its just u me and this brick wall u built between us bitch#now was EYE not answering texts for a minute. we dont need to get into it.#because the thing IS if i dont play things exactly right. and im not good at that without prior planning. i will accidentally say or do#something that i know. again. from being insane myself. would be just enough for them to hold onto hope#and im not trying to do that to them you know. i was trying to help with the detachment. shitty as it may be. i dont fucking know dude#this post is going to make me look kind of. well. whatever u guys have seen me at my worst. mostly. and post#ok one last thing sorry if this makes me sound like i have a giant ego. like wow heres this person who really liked me and im just shitting#all over them. not what im meaning to do but whatever
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taylor-titmouse · 2 months
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hey i want to talk about how you should be promoting your work as an erotic author/illustrator
i'm writing this up because the marketing aspect of my work as an erotic author/illustrator is a science to me, and also because i'm the guy who gets unreasonably annoyed when i see other creators not properly advertising their work. you presumably want to make money off your work. this post will be written under the assumption you want to make money off your work but are doing a bad job at it. it will be very confrontational. if you read this and feel attacked you're right and i am attacking you.
this is geared toward selling erotic comics/writing/books/art as products. i will probably write more than one post about this subject so if i didn't touch on something you want to know more about, comment/send me an ask and i'll keep it in mind for the next one.
i will start with my first and least specific but most important point:
DON'T GET FUCKING CUTE
hi are you paying attention. i'm gripping you by the sides of your face. do not get fucking cute with what you are trying to sell. you are not a big enough property to get cute, nobody LIKES it when big properties get cute, and you are selling porn. you have to own this. you have to be up front about this. don't be tongue in cheek, don't be all teehee i wonder what this could be~, don't be secretive. you are selling a product. you have to fucking act like it. you are an adult selling pornography to other adults. i am GRIPPING your HEAD you NEED to understand this.
and to be clear when i say 'cute' i mean coy. i don't mean cutesy, as in the aesthetic. you can be as hello kitty pastel ten emojis a post uwu as you like when you're building your audience and generating hype. but when you start trying to sell, don't be vague, don't be sarcastic, don't mislabel your work as a joke and assume everyone is on it. because they're not.
you must always assume 75% of the people seeing the thing you are advertising have no fucking idea who you are. and that includes a huge chunk of the people who already follow you. they do not know who you are or what you've been working on for two months or why they should care about it. they just got here. somebody just reposted it. they are seeing it for the first time. most people are only looking at social media for a tiny chunk of their day. they are not keeping up with you. you cannot get cute about what you are trying to sell because nobody knows what it is until you tell them.
okay are you still with me. we are going to talk about clarity now.
YOU GOTTA TELL ME WHAT IT IS
good lord the amount of times i have gone to buy somebody's comic or book and had no idea what's actually in it or what it's about. who are the characters? why should i care about them? what do they do in it? what is the premise of this thing you want me to spend $5 on? why would you not tell me? i'm shaking you again. please i have to know what i'm buying i only have so much money to spend on porn.
porn, arguably more than any other genre, relies on knowing exactly what is in it. you do not want to surprise your readers with a kink they were unaware of! and on the flip side, you do not want to miss out on your target audience! if your book contains a hot spider babe laying eggs in an elf, you have to say so. not just so people who don't want to read about eggs know it isn't for them, but so the people who are egg crazy can see that and go "oh fuck YES i love EGGS here is my $5 and an extra $2 tip for catering to me specifically". a contents/features list is as much an advertisement as it is a warning!
as for re: who the characters are and why should i care, i'm sorry but you need to learn how to write sales copy. you have to write blurbs. you have to get good at the shit that goes on the back of a book. we all hate it but we have to do it. i want to know who the characters are and what the context is. i, personally, am not interested in contemporary stories as much as fantasy and historical. please tell me what genre this porn exists in so i know if it aesthetically appeals to me. pull some books off your shelves and see how they do it. hell man go look at mine.
while you're there, note that every single book of mine has a sample of what's in it. this feels like such a no-brainer to me but again! the amount of times i have gone to buy somebody's work and they don't show me what their work looks like! you gotta give me the first page or two! just enough that i know if i like the way your writing sounds, or the way you draw your comics! i don't know you! i am not going to trust that you're good at what you do just based on a cover. the cover is to get me to this step, it is not the only step. you have to show me that you're worth spending my money on!
to put it less cynically, you want to catch my interest. you want me to go 'oh i want to see more of this', you want me to go 'ahh i want to know where this goes!' you need to get me invested and craving more. earn my $5!!!
YOU HAVE TO MAKE IT EASY TO GIVE YOU MONEY
hey go look at your bio right now. go look at your pinned post. do you have a link to your patreon there? do you have a link to your itchio/gumroad/whatever? do i have to click more than once to get to the places you want me to go to give you money? why? why are you making me click twice? have we learned nothing from every website making you click an extra time when they make some stupid UI update and how much it pisses us off? i have already given up, i have forgotten you, i am not giving you my $5 today. put your links in the easiest places to get to them.
god literally as i was writing this post i went to go find somebody's itchio to see how they described their work and it was not anywhere on their profile. grabbing you and shaking you PUT THE LINK WHERE I CAN FIND IT. don't make it hard! make it easy! i am a dickhead sitting on the toilet scrolling, saw your post, and was interested enough to read further. but you made me go to your bio to find your linktree and oops i have already gone back to my timeline to look at the boobies in the next post. stop wasting precious bio space on DNIs and put your fuckin links there!!!
this is more for the twitter people, but: just put the link in the damn post. just say the word commission. just say it's for patreon. "wuh wuh the algorithm" it is not the damn algorithm it's that everybody hates advertising and nobody wants to retweet ads. putting slashes in the words doesn't do anything and you look like a fool. i have posted so much art that says it's 'a commission for ___" and it did exactly as good as any other art despite having the word commission in it. and by doing the slashes you just made it impossible for anybody to search your account for your commission information (which should be at the VERY LEAST in a post under your pinned tweet if you're not actively posting about them being open).
okay that went on a tangent i'm going to back to the point of putting the link in the tweet. put it in the first post. not in the first reply. don't tell them to go to your bio. put it in the post people are actually going to share. it's fine to put more information in the thread but people are only ever going to share the first post. so put the link there. you have to make it easy. putting links in tweets can hurt you algorithmically, even in the replies. so you're better off having it in the post that actually gets seen and shared. i don't want to open the tweet and scroll to get to your sales page where i ASSUME you will have put all the information anyway. put it in the tweet that just got retweeted by itself onto my dash!
also you have to share it a ton of times. i repost my shit every few hours when i'm trying to push a new product. as i said before people are not 24/7 looking at their timelines. they missed it the first time. they missed it the second time. they didn't get paid yet that week but they were after the eighth time and you reminded them again so they finally bought it. that i will still get sales every time i repost a book ad weeks after release says there are always people who missed it, or who only just showed up.
abandon your pride and shill. shills pay their bills. anyone who gets annoyed about it isn't giving you money in the first place. don't worry about looking like a sell out. don't apologize for plugging your own work. post about it often, post about it in different ways. post about it. post about it. you are not going to make money if people don't know you have something to sell them. if you want to make a career out of it, you need to act like it.
I DON'T HAVE A FOURTH POINT
kisses your forehead. i'm sorry for yelling at you. i've been making and publishing and selling adult art for the past two-three years and have got myself to the point where it pays my rent, and i got there by paying attention to what does and does not work.
please do your best to make money. i want you to make money.
as i said above i plan to write more posts on this subject, such as cover design, how to actually write sales copy, and best practices with running a patreon, but if there's things you would want to hear more about leave a comment or send an ask! i will probably be less aggressive on future topics. these are just things that have grinded my gears for a grip.
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were--ralph · 4 months
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why exactly do you dislike generative art so much? i know its been misused by some folks, but like, why blame a tool because it gets used by shitty people? Why not just... blame the people who are shitty? I mean this in genuinely good faith, you seem like a pretty nice guy normally, but i guess it just makes me confused how... severe? your reactions are sometimes to it. There's a lot of nuance to conversation about it, and by folks a lot smarter than I (I suggest checking out the Are We Art Yet or "AWAY" group! They've got a lot on their page about the ethical use of Image generation software by individuals, and it really helped explain some things I was confused about). I know on my end, it made me think about why I personally was so reactive about Who was allowed to make art and How/Why. Again, all this in good faith, and I'm not asking you to like, Explain yourself or anything- If you just read this and decide to delete it instead of answering, all good! I just hope maybe you'll look into *why* some people advocate for generative software as strongly as they do, and listen to what they have to say about things -🦜
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if Ai genuinely generated its own content I wouldn't have as much of a problem with it, however what Ai currently does is scrape other people's art, collect it, and then build something based off of others stolen works without crediting them. It's like. stealing other peoples art, mashing it together, then saying "this is mine i can not only profit of it but i can use it to cut costs in other industries.
this is more evident by people not "making" art but instead using prompts. Its like going to McDonalds and saying "Burger. Big, Juicy, etc, etc" then instead of a worker making the burger it uses an algorithm to build a burger based off of several restaurant's recepies.
example
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the left is AI art, the right is one of the artists (Lindong) who it pulled the art style from. it's literally mass producing someone's artstyle by taking their art then using an algorithm to rebuild it in any context. this is even more apparent when you see ai art also tries to recreate artists watermarks and generally blends them together making it unintelligible.
Aside from that theres a lot of other ethical problems with it including generating pretty awful content, including but not limited to cp. It also uses a lot of processing power and apparently water? I haven't caught up on the newer developements i've been depressed about it tbh
Then aside from those, studios are leaning towards Ai generation to replace having to pay people. I've seen professional voice actors complain on twitter that they haven't gotten as much work since ai voice generation started, artists are being cut down and replaced by ai art then having the remaining artists fix any errors in the ai art.
Even beyond those things are the potential for misinformation. Here's an experiment: Which of these two are ai generated?
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ready?
These two are both entirely ai generated. I have no idea if they're real people, but in a few months you could ai generate a Biden sex scandal, you could generate politics in whatever situation you want, you can generate popular streamers nude, whatever. and worse yet is ai generated video is already being developed and it doesn't look bad.
I posted on this already but as of right now it only needs one clear frame of a body and it can generate motion. yeah there are issues but it's been like two years since ai development started being taken seriously and we've gotten to this point already. within another two years it'll be close to perfected. There was even tests done with tiktokers and it works. it just fucking works.
There is genuinely not one upside to ai art. at all. it's theft, it's harming peoples lives, its harming the environment, its cutting jobs back and hurting the economy, it's invading peoples privacy, its making pedophilia accessible, and more. it's a plague and there's no vaccine for it. And all because people don't want to take a year to learn anatomy.
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eff-plays · 8 months
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The way Astarion reacts depending on how you compliment him in the mirror scene (I have no interest in insulting him so I won't be covering that here, have fun though!) drives me fucking insane.
"I want to know what the world sees when it looks at me. What you see."
And you get two types of responses. First, your choices for compliments are
Strong, piercing eyes.
The creases when you laugh.
Pick the first, and he's pleased. "Go on," he says, sounding very seductive. You're giving him exactly what he wants, and he's encouraging it.
Pick the second, and he gets upset. He's an eternally young vampire, not your doting grandmother! You can do better than that. Even if you meant it as a compliment (I know my Tav definitely did), he doesn't seem to take it that way.
Your second options are
That dangerous smile.
The way your hair curls around your ears.
Once again, the first one pleases him, and he even praises your efforts. Very good. Now finish the scene and tell him he's beautiful.
But if you say the second, he gets exasperated. This is meant to be flattery, not poetry. Just tell him he's beautiful and we can call it a day, he says with a dismissive wave of his hand. He doesn't need to hear this crap, just tell him what he wants and fuck off.
Of course, it doesn't matter how you get to this point, and every dialogue option at the end of the scene nets you the same amount of approval. If you call him beautiful, it's +1. Call someone else beautiful, it's +1. If you ask whether he just wants shallow praise (aka don't call him beautiful), you get +1. So this is me pulling this out of my ass I guess.
I always choose to call him beautiful becuase 1) he is and 2) my Tav thinks so too and would oblige him if he asked for it that directly.
But I am obsessed with the different routes you can take to get to this point and what they imply.
Strong, piercing eyes and dangerous smile pleases him more outwardly, but doesn't actually affect the outcome. He's satisfied and confident with these compliments. They confirm what he's trying to project into the world, what he aspires to have and to be.
The creases when he laughs? The hair curling around his ears? Those are things he can't control, can't use against someone else. But he asked to be seen, and if this is what Tav sees, then what does that mean for him?
Why are they complimenting his laugh lines? Why are they speaking poetry at him? Why are they seeing things he has no control over, and why are they revealing them to him?
He doesn't want shallow praise. Questioning this nets approval, and giving it to him doesn't increase approval. What he wants is assurance that what he's trying to be is what the world sees, that he's in control.
And if you actually act as a mirror, point out the things unique to him that you see, he gets uncomfortable, because you're showing a reflection of someone he thinks he's not, of someone he has no control over. And that's scary, even if it's supposedly complimentary.
Because what's scarier than losing control?
But then, compared to how genuinely upset he seems when you insult him (I looked these up on YT for context), the laugh lines and hair curls are still accepted as compliments. So what does he think when Tav says these things?
They see past his piercing eyes and dangerous smile. They see something else that they like even more, things he's not aware of or doesn't appreciate as much. What does that feel like, to cultivate such a perfect image of oneself for the purposes of seducing and tricking others, and then be stumped when someone walks past all that and points out something entirely different that they noticed and found endearing?
Do you do him a favor, and tell him you see only what he wants to be? Or do you speak the truth, and show him what he actually is? Which one is better? Which one is worse?
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microclown · 4 months
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I was rewatching s1e3 and something finally clicked for me..
Please forgive me if this seems obvious to you. It helps me to type out my thoughts, but I'm sure I'm just an idiot and no one else needs this explained to them, lol. That said - I was always slightly confused by the emotional weight of the holy water arc during the flashback sequence. Particularly I was confused by how angry Crowley got when Aziraphale referred to their relationship as fraternizing in the 1862 fight. I mean, "to associate or form a friendship with someone, especially when one is not supposed to" is exactly what they are doing, right? So why the 80 year breakup?
Crowley says he wants the holy water for if "it" all goes pear shaped. The phrasing is necessarily vague, and could mean lots of things. Since I know what he eventually uses it for, I was thinking about it in the context of Armageddon, or maybe more generally and vaguely about Crowley not always choosing to go along with Hell, and associating with Aziraphale. But there was not much reason for Crowley to already be thinking about Armageddon back then.
As we know from the full diary entry Neil posted, the timeline of the Edinburgh entry, and the cut bookshop opening scene, it seems like Crowley and Aziraphale were spending A LOT of time together by the 1800's. When Crowley is pulled back down to Hell in 1827, he learns that Hell is paying more attention to him than he'd previously thought. Crowley realizes at this point that spending so much time with Aziraphale is actively putting him in real danger. He recognizes that, and instead of breaking things off, or seeing Aziraphale less, he doubles down. If this relationship is dangerous, then he wants the tools to fight for it.
That's what I think I didn't get about the holy water request. It's not just general insurance, it's specifically insurance for if Hell finds out about him and Aziraphale. It's also a super vulnerable request because in making it, Crowley is openly acknowledging how important their relationship is to him. Aziraphale casually brings up the arrangement at the beginning of the conversation, and that's part of it, right? Because the whole basis of their relationship is the arrangement. It continues to be the pretense under which they meet, despite the relationship clearly having developed beyond that. And the arrangement, as Crowley proposed it in 537, is born out of convenience, and the assumption that Heaven and Hell would never notice anyway.
Crowley's request for insurance breaks that facade. He's acknowledging that it's not convenient, or safe, but he wants to do it anyway, despite the risk.
Aziraphale, on the other hand, is not ready for the screen to be taken away so abruptly. To make it worse, he assumes Crowley wants the holy water as an escape, rather than a weapon. Suddenly he is confronted with both the danger their association poses, and the idea that Crowley might choose to take his own life. He can't imagine the guilt of being directly responsible for the latter.
I also think the strength of his own emotional response to the thought of losing Crowley catches Aziraphale off guard. He hasn't admitted to himself how much he actually cares, and it scares him. Worrying about Heaven is more comfortable and familiar, so he falls back on that and switches to "If they knew I'd been... fraternizing!"
But bringing up the threat of Heaven reads to Crowley as Aziraphale saying "You may be willing to put yourself at risk for the sake of our relationship, but I am not." The word choice of "fraternizing" comes off as a dismissive and demeaning way to describe a relationship that Crowley just admitted he would risk his life for.
It's an unintentionally deep cut when Crowley is already at his most vulnerable, and so he lashes out. As far as we've seen, this is possibly the first time Crowley has truly lashed out at Aziraphale. So yeah, 80 year breakup makes sense!
And what makes this so much worse is what happens next. Crowley reaches out again in 1941 with a dramatic gesture (rescuing Aziraphale from the Nazis, saving his books). It's clear they've missed each other. They don't discuss the fight, but it's there subtextually. Aziraphale, tentatively and thrillingly, refers to them as friends, for the first time ever. He tells Crowley that he trusts him.
And then, that very same night their worst fears are confirmed. Just when they've finally reconciled a fight over the dangers of their relationship, and just when Aziraphale has finally admitted that it is not a relationship of convenience, but genuine friendship, they are exposed. Crowley is going to face punishment from Hell, explicitly for being Aziraphale's "trusted confident", and he doesn't have insurance. If Aziraphale's trick hadn't succeeded, Crowley would have had no way to protect himself.
idk it just makes me feel things ok
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homunculus-argument · 3 months
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My fault as a person is that I have zero sympathy for people who don't even try to understand what I'm saying. I have comprehension issues, I often miss roughly 20% of what people say to me, so I've learned to somewhat-instinctively just come up with two or three most likely options of what they might mean, and choose the one that makes the most sense in context, because I'm more likely to assume that the person I'm talking with is an intelligent person who says things that make sense.
So I tend to assume that other people do the same, and get insulted when they assume that I said something stupid. I project my own pathways of thinking onto them, and assume their thought process goes "hmm, did this person mean it in the regularly interpreted way that would be an idiotic claim in this context, or the literal way that makes perfect sense in this context? Since I believe that this person is fucking stupid, then obviously they mean the idiotic thing."
I get angry at people misunderstanding me because I instinctively assume that they function by the same framework as I do, understanding 80% and doing context clue deduction for the last 20%. So it feels like they're going out of their way to misunderstand me when 90% of what I said should make sense in context, but they specifically chose the 10% and pretend it's what I meant.
If I say "you see more birds in the city than in the wild", I think what I meant is obvious because it can be interpreted in two ways: either that there are more birds in the city, or that the city birds are simply more visible to people because they are habituated to human presence. And since one claim is idiotic and the other one makes sense, I take it as their assessment of my intelligence whether they assume I'd say something stupid, or something that makes sense.
So I am offended and insulted when people respond to a statement like that with "of course there are more birds in the wilderness than in cities! How could you say that?" and linking me with 15 pages of bird statistics. And I am outraged that I have to clarify that I literally meant seeing them, that the presence of birds is more visually evident in cities where they do not go out of their way to hide from humans. Obviously I know that there are more birds in the wild than within cities, as I am not fucking stupid.
And people just go "how was I supposed to know that you literally meant exactly what you said?" like it's perfectly understandable that they'd rather interpret my words as the words of an idiot.
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pippin-katz · 8 months
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Alex & Being Bisexual 🩷💜💙
I've seen a lot of people complaining about Alex not having as big of a crisis over being bisexual as he did in the books, but I feel like a lot of people are overlooking the development he does go through.
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Henry is the first guy he has felt attracted to that he actually knew prior to getting physically involved.
Alex & Miguel
Nora's asks specifically about men Alex has "been with", not men he's liked or interested him. She means physically, and he knows that too. Alex doesn't even bother with giving any context or details for his high school hook up. His description of his hook up with Miguel is straightforward, direct, and factual, because he doesn't have an emotional attachment to that moment or Miguel.
This, and his interactions with Miguel, gives the impression that they don't really know each other that well. It seems like they met during the campaign, made out in a hot tub, and now occasionally they talk at school.
They don't seem like friends, rather acquaintances after a one night stand, which is pretty much what they did. Their first conversation is mostly Miguel trying to get quotes for his journal and flirting with him rather than any kind of real discussion.
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Gifs courtesy of @phakphumm from this post
Alex isn't stupid; he knows Miguel is flirting with him, however he chooses not to acknowledge it. He doesn't discourage him, but he does not encourage him either.
He avoids saying anything about it at all. His expressions after the eyelashes comment show him at a bit of a loss for how to respond. Alex seems flattered by the compliment, but doesn't seem to have any real desire to hook up again.
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Everything Miguel says, he says in an attempt to get something out of him, whether it be flirting to hook up and/or get quotes for his journal.
Same thing at the state dinner; Alex isn't fully paying attention cause he's busy staring at Henry, but Miguel opens with compliments, specifically about his memo, which is definitely an attempt to flatter him. Then he starts asking direct questions about the campaign, Alex doesn't answer, and he walks away. They're not really friends.
New Territory
It's one thing to admit being somewhat attracted to the same sex, under limited, physical circumstances. Lots of people often joke about "being straight/gay but I would sleep with this person".
It's another thing to develop an attraction to a person you know of the same sex when you've never had those feelings before. It's not just physical anymore, because you know and like this person outside of that context, and the physical intimacy gains a new meaning.
Alex VS Feelings
This is a new feeling for Alex. This man practically makes out with two women he barely knows without any qualms, but when he's waiting to see Henry? His close friend who he knows and plans to kiss?
He is nervous; not just a little nervous either:
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Alex is a pretty confident guy, able to host massive parties and dance without any reservations about it, unlike Henry who awkwardly bounces. He's a fantastic public speaker. Excluding the wedding, which were extreme circumstances, he's able to navigate a room comfortably. We know from the closet conversation that he used to get scared, but it's clear based on his campaign efforts, the DNC speech, and so on that he's grown into his role and can play it well.
Here, Alex can't sit still. He doesn't know how to stand. He's shifting around, almost pacing. He visibly tries to muster up the confidence we know he has, but can't. He's trying to pose, or look confident, and almost gets there, but the second the door opens, he panics and just stands there.
"But that's just cause he really likes Henry!"
Yes, exactly; Henry is his first step towards fully realizing his identity.
Once the tension is broken, Alex is confident again and doesn't hesitate anymore. He may not be completely sure of his identity, but he is completely sure that he wants Henry. Those thoughts take priority when he kisses him. He knows physical intimacy. He knows how to kiss with someone regardless of who they are. He has been with a couple men, and is a man himself, so he knows what feels good. His confidence stays intact during their exchange when they get to his bedroom.
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There are very small moments where you can see his nerves poke through.
When Henry pushes Alex over the couch, not only is it surprising to him, it also disconnects them for a few seconds. He has a chance to look at Henry while they're not touching or kissing, no direct distraction.
When Henry starts undoing his pants, he looks up, inhales quickly, blinks a couple times, and swallows; it's almost like he's thinking "okay this is actually happening now". Again, no direct distraction, as Henry isn't doing anything yet, and Alex isn't touching or kissing him.
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Both moments go by fast though because he's focused on what he knows, the physical part. He knows he wants Henry physically, so he can focus on that, and deal with the other feelings later.
Alex is aware that he has feelings toward Henry that are new to him. He doesn't know what they mean, and it's nothing even close to what he feels later in Paris and at the lake house, but they're starting to form. He's the one who suggests that he and Henry see each other again, and you would have to be blind not to see the brief disappointment on his face when Henry says it has to be very casual. It's also important to note that this is right after Alex comes out.
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The Bisexual Label
While his feelings make Alex nervous, Henry is still his friend and he feels comfortable around him. He's the first person he comes out to; he was unable to say anything definitive about his identity during his conversation with Nora, despite her best efforts to help him.
Henry is the first person he tells and he distinctly shows uncertainty when he first uses the bisexual label:
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He's serious about it; not overly serious, but he's coming out very formally. He's nervous, even though he's telling Henry, who he literally hooked up with five minutes ago. Henry already knows he's attracted to men. Alex is not nervous about that; it is clearly the label that he's uncertain about.
Confidence
A lot of people get taken by surprise when they start questioning their identity because they had simply never thought about it before.
The uncertainty Alex has about his identity was initiated by his feelings for Henry. Alex clearly never considered the idea of being in an actual relationship with a man. Without Henry, he may have never figured out that he was fully bisexual. He may have continued fooling around occasionally with guys, never giving serious thought to the other possibilities, unless/until he met someone like Henry who basically smacks him in the face with a mirror.
Being with Henry makes him truly think about himself, and come to the conclusion that he's bisexual. Seeing/dating Henry also makes him more comfortable and confident in his identity over time.
While Alex hadn't acknowledged Miguel's advances before, after he sleeps with Henry, he actively calls him out on it and refuses without hesitation as soon as Miguel puts the suggestion out there. Miguel even says "Well, I don't anymore", confirming that had been his intention in earlier scenes.
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He had been trying to hook up with him again, and because Alex never addressed it, Miguel thought that it was possible. Alex may not have addressed his comments, but Miguel could see for himself that they had a positive reaction; he felt flattered and bashful. That response coupled with the fact that Alex did not outright tell him to stop was enough reason for Miguel to think it could happen again.
Also, Alex told Nora that he got the feeling Miguel wanted to hook up again, but that he was a journalist, which does not say he wouldn't be down. He never says he wouldn't want to; instead he expresses his apprehension to the idea due to his job. So for all intents and purposes, before Henry came along, Miguel was correct to think it was a possibility.
This seems to be the first time Alex has ever actually addressed their tension, and it occurs after he starts seeing Henry and using the bisexual label.
Owning The Bi Label
Then Zahra finds him and Henry the next morning. She is kind enough not to tell Ellen immediately, because even if she won't admit it, she does care about Alex a lot and recognizes the importance of something like this. However, she makes it very clear that he needs to tell her ASAP or she will.
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When he comes out to his mom, he is significantly more sure of himself when he uses the bisexual label. He laughs and uses the shorten term "bi" which is a small detail but indicates his confidence, compared to how he cautiously said "bisexual" when coming out to Henry. He's not at all nervous to use the term, and says it grinning.
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This is also indicative of his confidence in his label because Alex doesn't lead with his sexuality. He leads with meeting someone, and clarifying that it's a man, and that it's Henry. So once they're on the couch talking, Ellen is also already aware that he is attracted to men, but this time, he's prompted about his label and he shows zero nerves about using the term "bi".
Queer Identity
By the end of the movie, Alex is able to publicly refer to himself as having a queer identity. Obviously, he was outed against his will, but he is still able to stand up and acknowledge who he is without nerves about it. He has been with Henry for a year, and he knows who he is, and he’s not ashamed of it. As he says, the leaks were an issue of privacy, not shame. Alex is not afraid to say who he is, and he is queer, he is bisexual. He’s a different person than he was before Henry. He’s learned about himself because of him.
Does he have a complete, computer-error-noise breakdown over it? No, he doesn’t, but he does not immediately start waving a bi flag around either.
Okay, that’s all! This took so freaking long to put together, but I hope it helps people understand how his bisexuality is addressed in the movie. Just because he has a different journey than he did in the book does not mean he did not have a journey at all, and I hope this allows people to see it more clearly! Thank you for reading!
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q-nihachu · 3 months
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I've been thinking about what it is so specifically about Minecraft roleplay that involves so much sharing of interpretation between creator and audience. And what I've landed on is that the crux of it is something entirely separate from either. There is a third party providing interpretation—that of the "world" (the video game) the characters occupy.
See, there are a lot of different game worlds used for storytelling. For example, The Sims. When a creator tells a story using The Sims, the actions are provided by the game. There's very little that is vague in terms of what the characters are doing. The creator may still provide the characters' thought processes and link everything together for you, but the game is doing the heavy lifting of the storytelling.
Take an opposite example. D&D provides quite a lot in terms of worldbuilding, but most of the story is told via an entirely separate medium: speech. If one character stabs another, the game provides, perhaps, two minis colliding. That doesn't tell you much. So, the creators narrate every aspect of the what's happening, from the characters' thought processes to the sensory impact of what they've done. The actions themselves still leave little up to interpretation because you've heard them directly from the creators' mouths.
Finally, take Minecraft. In contrast to the other two, the actions characters take are often ambiguous. We know if one character hits another, but we don't know what that means. It could be nothing, or it could be a deep betrayal. The same action is used by a QSMP egg to say "hey, I have a sign for you to read" that c!Wilbur uses to violently and righteously beat c!Dream to death in his fantasy. So, in the ambiguity of the action lies a tricky situation. The game doesn't detail what the action is (a tap on the shoulder or a punch to the face), but the creator can't either. It would be a betrayal of their medium to do so. They have only the tools of context and reaction to indicate what an action means. And these are very useful tools! It's clear that when Wilbur beats Dream, it's to be taken with the gravity of a real-world beating.
But because of this unwritten rule that actions can't be clearly stated, Minecraft roleplay creates a story that requires the audience to interpret themselves what, exactly, is happening. They can choose not to engage with this. If two players bump into each other, the audience doesn't have to say what that means. The creator can also choose to state things outright at times. Perhaps when those players collided, it was a hug. But the gift of the medium is when neither of those things happen, and the audience gets to say, "They did that on purpose to be hostile!" Maybe that wasn't what the creator intended with the action, but they kept to the rule—so the story now, uniquely, belongs to the audience to create.
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gorgeouslypink · 8 months
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everything about the void state | vanilla explain's
A few things to note. First of all, Vanilla was a very knowledgeable and supportive master shifter on DRA (a shifting amino community). You can read some of their other posts and you'll understand they really know their stuff and have dedicated a lot of time to understand this. Second, after reading this post, you'll understand why the void state isn't "just a method."
Here is the link to the og post: link
hello and welcome to this post! i am currently fighting against all the misinformation about the void state in this community and of course i had to post a full guide about it! here you'll read what the void is, what it's not, why it's extremely cool and multiple guides how to enter it!
table of content
i. intro
ii. the void
- what is it
- what is it not
- why the void state
- what it "looks like"
iii. how to enter it
- the "before state"
- awake
- sleep
- other ways
- affirmations
iv. q & a
v. outro
i. intro
in this post i talk about everything in context of the void state. i explain in deep detail what it actually is, clear up more misinformation, how to enter it in a lot of different ways, why the void is really nice and useful and in the end even have a q&a for everyone that got questions! you will notice how insane many misinformation are here. not just a few but full "guides" and "explanations" with it. please do not blame the creators for spreading them more! if you thought the same, you also could've been one of the people making posts about it.
ii. the void
let's start with the actual topic. to explain what the void is we have to know what exactly we are at first. so, what are we, what are you? you are an awareness. that means you are a tiny swabble-bubble thingy that experience the multiverse. right now you are on the physical plane so you see, hear, feel, smell, and taste. you can do a lot more things but the only important one is that you exist. you have no original appearance or identity (that's another topic) at this moment you are just you. you experience the 3d as y/n y/l/n. there are a few more things of course like your subcons and all that but it is not important for us now.
what is it?
we know that we are an awareness currently on the physical plane. we don't have an original identity we belong to as much as a reality. so what happens if we leave the 3d? is that even possible? yes, yes it is. that is the void state. the void means that you leave the physical plane. that is all. it is nothing special or unusual. the void state is the state of awareness. you, the tiny swabble-bubble thingy, exist there in your purest, most natural form. you could say the void is your home. when you aren't in a reality, you are in the void state. it's where you always return to and there is nothing more natural for you. you are just power, happiness, and peace there. nothing from the 3d can effect you anymore, your mind get's a whole reset. what does that mean? you have to know that you, the awareness, are not meant to doubt, have limited beliefs, worries, fears, trauma. it isn't natural or normal for you. you have them here on the 3d because they are physical circumstances. once you leave the physical plane, it of course means that they don't exist anymore. you enter it and BOOM they get completely erased. you won't even understand how you could believe such stuff after that. as you can see, the void is the state where you exist in your most "original" form, even if you don't have any identity or something like that.
what is it not
this is gonna be a long, long list. i'll actually make bullet points with everything i've ever heard here so you don't have to ask in the comments "someone said it is xy, is that true?". you can be very very sure that everything here in this list got 100% nothing at all to do with the void state. in the end i'll talk about the most drastic thing's but i also explained a lot already in my post about misconceptions.
- "body asleep, mind awake"
- meditation
- dreaming
- sats
- a sleep state
- the god state (mindset definition)
- theta state
- the "before state"
- relaxation
- the thing after you woke up
- being " in your brain"
- any other physical state at all⠀ ⁣⠀⁣⠀ ⁣⠀⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ ⁣⠀⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ ⁣⠀⁣⠀ ⠀ ⁣as you can see, you guys came up with a lot of things! you may already understood, the void means leaving the physical plane, so its being a physical state is absolutely impossible. you do not notice it on the 3d. at all. it is just not possible. many, many ask me "why didn't i shift from the void" but tell me a few sentence later "and i only felt my body a little bit" and i sit there like "okay, i'll start from the very beginning".
so please guys, in the void you leave the physical plane. you have no body. you can't feel anything physical at all. when you "felt your body only a little bit" you weren't even near the void. once you entered it, the physical plane doesn't exist for you anymore. with these very important information we can just ignore 10 things from the list now because we know that they aren't true at all. last but not least "it is the god state". but what is the god state? there are two main definitions here 1. just another term for the void so it's totally okay to say it, but what many here mean is 2. the "god state" mindset. that's a bit tricky, the second meaning is just a mindset. it represents your natural state of mind where you are limitless and powerful. you have it immediately in the void BUT if you have it here on the 3d you are not automatically in the void. you are still on the physical plane. tiny but important difference.
why the void state
you may already thought "damn, that sounds cool" but do you know how cool it actually is? besides that you finally align with your natural state of mind, that the void is pure happiness, peace, and joy, that you can chill there as much as you want, you can also do everything you want!! whatever it is, there are no limits. so here a few things you may don't know you can do:
- change the past
- skip time
- change your whole appearance to your liking
- shift everywhere
- manifest to wake up every night in the void
- manifest the future
- erase things (f.e. racism etc)
- manifest to always shift instantly
- change everything about your life
- manifest to lucid dream every night⠀ ⁣
as you can see, a lot more than many people think of. and the coolest?? it is instantly, in the very moment you want it, 100% reality. in the void the 3d/4d time gap can not exist because you are ABOVE the 3d. in the void you and your subcons work completely together that means that you literally give the commands. what do you have to do for it? want it. you don't even need affirmations or anything. you just want it and it is reality, no other possible outcome. in the void you can not fail, never and with nothing. if you ever thought you were in the void but "didn't shift" this is your clear sign that you were definitely not in the void. you are pure power there, it is impossible for you to fail at anything.
what it "looks like"
a question many, many have! what do you see in the void? actually you see nothing. you have nothing to see, you have no eyes. that's something most people are afraid of, deep, endless black and nothingness. but that's not the whole answer. you can customize your void! you have something called a "mental image". it is a picture you have in your mind and that is what you see. you can change it to your liking, very common here are galaxies. you could compare it to very, very vivid visualization but you don't have to focus on it and it's completely natural. you see whatever you want to see in the void. if you don't want black nothingness, you won't have it. very simple. so please don't be scared!
iii. how to enter it
there are a lot of ways to enter the void! you can basically leave the 3d through everything you want but of course a few things are easier for the mainstream than others. just try what you like and don't think you have to enter it immediately. i always compare it to speaking a language after a long ass break. it's weird and maybe seems hard, but every day you get more confident and notice how easy it is. that's the exact same with the void. everything is progress because every single thing is one step closer to being comfortable.
the "before state"
a term you guys hear extremely often from me. i came up with it because this was also a misinformation. but wait, what is it?? the so called "before state." it describes the time where you, the awareness, get ready to leave the physical plane. it always happens and especially beginner can feel A LOT there. it is the state where you feel like spinning, floating, falling all at once with tingles, dizziness, and confrusion. some time ago people said that this is the void. it is not. that's, as you already know by now, something that happens before you enter the void. many feel it, some do not and that is completely okay. for most people that actually feel it this intense it get's less and less every time they try. like you get more and more used to the idea of the void state, you know? you mostly witness it when you try to enter it awake or through a physical state. if you think you can not stand it, that's okay, you got enough other ways!
awake
made for biginner and everyone else
-before doing anything, ask yourself what you wanna do there? do you wanna chill a bit, manifest something, shift? with the intention or affirmations? if you can answer that you're good to go
-maybe put your phone away really quick to just calm down a bit so you're not full of energy while trying. you could draw something instead?
-lay down in a position where you know that it won't distract you. nothing that hurts or is uncomfortable
-now it helps many (especially when it's your fist attemps) to have a vague "plan". do you wanna visualize? affirm? counting?
-if you wanna relax more you can take a few breaths at the beginning
-after that try to just don't care about your body. don't care about your breath (and DON'T focus on it!!), you can count or start visualizing/affirming till you reach a deep deep relaxed state
-now you'll probably start feeling A LOT. physically and mentally (i don't talk about the itchy-pain feeling, that's just you body). your body will feel like floating, spinning and falling at the same time, you'll be dizzy and "confused". that's okay and totally normal. just stand it, do not fight it*
-if you have trouble affirming while that happen just think about it, it doesn't have to be very specific
-after that you'll feel nothing, absolutely nothing
-then you'll leave the physical plane, you'll just know it because you feel inner peace and happiness and calm
*this is the before state and will most probably get less intense every time you try sleep
you can also enter it with a sleep method! a thing not many people know but that's why we are here, right? just go to bed, now you can do several things
- listen to subliminals
- affirm
- visualize
- have mental conversations about the void
- just set your intention
you can do all, you can do none, just one, whatever you want. it is like the intention for shifting just with the difference that you wanna leavsle the 3d and not change your physical environment. it is the method many people use when they have problems with the before state, don't wanna lay still or have no time for it. you can do it anytime, everywhere. if you focus right now on lucid dreaming? awesome, you can still intend. in fact, the intention is exactly equally progress as when you try it awake. so it's definitely not just a "lazy version"!
other ways
as said, you can leave the physical plane through everything but here are some of your favorites:
- lucid dreaming
you can do it already or practice it right now? awesome! maybe try to enter the void state throught it. once the dream is lucid start to say affirmations, visualize or intend. or whatever you feel called to do
- physical states
you can reach sats easily? the theta state? you meditate or are able to disconnect from your body?use it for the void state if you want. if you can enter one of these and it helps you to disconnect from the physical world, that is really great. do whatever you want to do or ate able to. the same recommended as always, visualization, affirmations, no matter what you like the most
- " is this even real?"
you know the moment when life feels kinda unreal?when you look at the physical world and genuinely question how this can be reality? these are great moments to affirm you are in the void! if it feels unreal, who could proof that you aren't in the void?
- subliminals
got no time or just don't wanna try? there are many good subliminals out there to enter the void state. personally i recommend solars one. just listening to subliminals can also bring you in the void. they send clear commands of what you want to your subconscious mind and it will just say "oh, wanna leave? okay got you sweetie!"
affirmations
- i am pure awareness
- i am pure consciousness
- i am in the void
- i am in the void state
- i leave the physical plane
- i leave the 3d
- i completely disconnect from the 3d
- i can not get influenced by anything physical
- i am just pure awareness
- i have my natural state of mind
- i have my natural power
- i am home
- the void is my home
- i am where i'm supposed to be
- i leave the physical plane behind me
- i leave my body behind me
- i am pure nothing
- i want to leave the physical plane
- i am comfortable with leaving the physical plane
- leaving the physical plane is natural for me
- i am used to leave the physical plane
- i am used to being the void
- the void is my natural place
iv. q & a
just ask anything in the comments and i'll answer it here! or if you want you can take a look at my ask me anything - void state related, there are also a lot different questions!
q: do you feel unconditional love in the void?
a: you could describe it like that. you feel truly happy, at peace, calm, loved, secure, all the positive things you naturally should feel :smile:
q: Hey! Even if I don’t practice it awake and just intent to get into void state and sleep will my body get used to leave the 3D?
a: absolutely!! it's the same amount of progress :smile:
v. outro
this was my post about the void state and the first part of "vanilla explain's" my series where i explain things to you that aren't very common here! if you have wishes and ideas, let me know. please also comment every question you may have about the void state
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sage-nebula · 1 month
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"Suffer No Fools" - Shiver vs. Marina Analysis
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It's been a few days since "Suffer No Fools" released, but I wanted to go ahead and release my analysis of Shiver's and Marina's verse since that's the one that has caused the most discussion within the fandom. I've seen a lot of debate over Marina's section in particular, with people unsure whether she was being sincere or sarcastic, and I think the actual answer is a little more complicated than one or the other, at least with regards to the first couplet of lines both she and Shiver sing. Of course, people are free to interpret this song however they wish, but after seeing numerous interpretations I personally didn't vibe with, I just wanted to put my own out there, breaking it down line by line.
So! Here we go.
Exchange 1:
Shiver: "Your haunting voice -- there's no escape. How nice it must be for your fans." Marina: "You're far too kind! I love your vibe. I can learn so much from your style."
Analyzing from dialogue only:
Shiver is insulting Marina's voice by calling it haunting and saying there is no escape, insinuating she wishes there was one. She says how nice it must be for Marina's fans, again implying that she isn't one.
Marina says that she loves Shiver's vibe, which on the surface could be a compliment, but given the context (a music battle) it could also be a Mean Girl "ooh I love your [thing] :)" passive-aggressive drawing-attention-to-something-ugly insult. More direct though, is the "I can learn so much from your style"; you can learn what not to do from someone just as much as you can learn what to do from someone. Marina's engaging in plausible deniability here.
HOWEVER. Lyrics are NOT the only thing that need to be analyzed from this first verse, which is arguably the MOST important exchange between these two. Instead, we need to look at how these lines are delivered.
Shiver is singing in a traditional Japanese folk singing style, specifically a style based on Shima-uta, which her voice actress has a background singing in. Unfortunately, I don't know the actual term for this style of singing, only that it's not kakegoe, something Shiver also does that is different from this. Anyway, in these lines specifically Shiver is singing in her Shima-uta style, a style that she has presumably been practicing since she was a small child, a style that is probably culturally significant to the Hohojiro clan. Singing in this style is not something that just anyone can do. It's completely different from singing in a (for lack of a better word) "western" style. The way you breathe is completely different. The way you incorporate your voice into your breathing is completely different. So by singing in this style, which Shiver has been doing practically her whole life and which, presumably, only she of the four there can do, Shiver is FLEXING on Marina regardless of what lyrics she chooses to sing.
But then Marina, who grew up under the domes in Inkadia, who presumably has never heard Shima-uta before she started listening to Deep Cut and heard Shiver sing, who presumably has had absolutely no training whatsoever on this style of song . . . mimics it perfectly and flexes on Shiver right back.
Could Marina's words to Shiver be interpreted as passive-aggressive in turn? Yes. But does it matter? No, not really. Because in this first verse, Marina's ACTUAL comeback is to take the style of singing that Shiver has been perfecting her entire life and throw it right back in her face despite having never (as far as we or Shiver know) practiced it herself. Shiver was flexing by presumably doing something Marina couldn't do, only for Marina to do it flawlessly, being every bit as divine with a voice so fine as Pearl said she was previously. Marina says "I love your vibe" so she takes it. Marina says "I have so much to learn from you" but does she really, when she can already do exactly what Shiver can, and has, just now, right in front of her?
And Shiver noticed, hence:
Exchange 2:
Shiver: "You remind me of my neighbor's little daughter . . . What's that saying? 'Octo see, octo do.'" Marina: "Glad you approve -- your praise has left me moved. Thanks to your notes, I'll find my groove!"
Shiver drops the Shima-uta singing, because now there's no point. Marina can also sing in that style, so it's no longer a flex. Shiver lost ground on that one, so instead we're back to the same (again, for lack of a better word) "regular" style of singing that everyone else is using. For that reason, we can go back to analyzing purely based on the words alone.
Shiver is calling Marina a copycat, essentially, because Marina copied her Shima-uta singing style in the previous verse (hence why Shiver had to drop it, as previously noted). Marina then gives her "glad you approve -- your praise has left me moved" . . . basically noting that by Shiver accusing her of copying, Shiver is saying that Marina -- someone who just tried the singing style off the cuff right there on the stage for the first time -- was just as good as Shiver, someone who has trained in that style her whole life. The audience saw for themselves that Marina was able to emulate the style, but Shiver saying, "you copied me!" is basically admitting that Marina was just as good as her in Shiver's own eyes, and Shiver is a pro. That's Shiver's aggravation handing Marina the win and Marina smiling wide as she accepts it.
Exchange 3:
Shiver: "Oh, look at the time. Isn't it getting late?" Marina: "Not at all! I could go on like this all night long."
This one doesn't even really need an analysis. For all that she prides herself on being "so cool even sharks call her cold-blooded," Shiver is known for being easily irritated and riled when she's losing due to her competitive nature. Marina successfully got under her skin, and this is her trying to end the battle fast because she didn't have any further comebacks. Marina, meanwhile, gives the classic "I could go on all night" because she's not riled at all, and is instead perfectly comfortable in this environment, knows what she's doing, and has had the upper hand from the start.
It goes back to another post I made about Experience vs. Inexperience. Shiver and Frye are still new idols, whereas Pearl and Marina have been at this for a long while. And while off the stage Marina is a sweet, kind, gentle person who will go out of her way to help others, and can sometimes be a little spacey or naive, she's also a 23-year-old literal genius who has been in the music industry for years now and knows full well what a rap / music battle is and knows her way around a stage. Personally, I found it to be a little infantilizing to insinuate that she "didn't realize Shiver was insulting her," when not only do I think she knew full well, but also she was the one with the upper hand not because of sick burns (that's Pearl's department), but because of sheer innate musical talent.
But those are just my thoughts! Everyone else is free to have their own.
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