#bed bug registry

[callmewrinkles3]

"A dream come true."

🥹🥹🥹🥹

-🐰🩵

Saying that Em was exhausted didn’t even begin to cover it, she was something totally beyond that. She was sleepy, sore, emotional, and hormonal, but they finally had their baby girl. Five days after Lulu was born, four days after they brought her home, they were trying to get used to all of this. Being parents to a newborn was new and scary and exciting and terrifying that someone had let them leave the hospital with their baby girl. Everything was a new adventure. Everything was wonderful and terrifying. It was an emotional rollercoaster, but they were happy.

Em was happy.

Even when she woke up in the middle of the night to feed Lulu she was nothing but thankful. They had their baby, she was safe and healthy which was all that mattered to them. And on top of that Dan was there, the most wonderful husband and father in the world. He did the early mornings and late nights feeding and changing nappies so Em could get a few extra hours of sleep. He was the one who left to go bug the staff in the Registry of Births, Deaths, and Marriages so they got Lulu’s birth certificate earlier than they would have. And had the first appointment after Christmas to get Lulu’s passport expedited so they could get to England sooner rather than later.

And between being a dad and all the bureaucracy that he had to deal with, Dan was looking after Em. He made sure she was as comfortable as possible while adapting to everything, but especially to her new body. She thought she looked terrible, but Dan kept repeating again and again that she was the most wonderful woman in the world. That afternoon was no exception.

She was in bed holding Lulu while she took a nap, watching her daughter’s pout as she breathed in and out, just waiting for her to wake for a feed. Dan found her like that, hair messy in a topknot, wearing his old shirt and shorts, and all he whispered as he slid in beside her in the bed was “you’re a dream come true, Baby girl.”.

Em couldn’t help look at him with a smile on her face, moving to lean against her husband while the only thing she could think was this life with her little family was her own dream come true.

[withahappyrefrain]

Made From Love

Summary: You and Peter meet your child for the first time.

Warning: talks of childbirth and labor (nothing graphic but it's talked about) lots of fluff, Dad!Peter comes with its own warning

∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

Labor really was a bitch. To the point it was making it hard for you to be excited about not being pregnant anymore.

The last nine months had been a whirlwind. You didn't think it was possible to love Peter anymore than you already did, until you saw him prepare to be a parent. He came to every doctor's appointment, researched everything on your baby registry and spent hours putting together furniture. When your water broke, he already had your hospital bag packed and ready to go. He even offered to swing you to the hospital.

"Pete, I'd rather give birth in a taxi," you told him at the time.

"That's your choice bug. I have helped deliver many babies in taxis," He responded. You knew your husband being Spider-Man had some unexpected perks, like super strength-which had been incredibly helpful the last few months. knowledge of child birth, was not on your bingo card.

Right now though, you'd rather him stay by your side, allowing you to squeeze his hand as hard as you wanted.

"Come on bug, you know you can't crush my hand. Squeeze it as hard as you want," He encouraged. He hadn't left your side ever since you were put on the hospital bed.

A surge of pain raced through your body as another contraction came on. You took Peter up on his offer.

"If it makes you feel better, you can say you hate me. I am the reason you're in this situation right now," he said, trying to console you. Peter hated that all he could was watch you be in pain.

"Peter, I could never hate you," as if your child heard you, another contraction swept through your body, "but I'm not a huge fan of your dick and its reproductive abilities right now."

He chuckled as he pressed a kiss to your sweaty forehead, "You're doing great bug. I'm so proud of you."

Again, it was impossible to hate Peter. Even if his dick was the reason you were in great pain right now. It would be at least two years-minimum- before you could even think about doing this again.

"Alright, it's time to start pushing," a nurse told you. Despite all the articles, books, podcasts, and classes you consumed, you were still caught off guard that it was time to meet your child.

"You got this Y/N. I'm right here and after this I'll get you sushi just like I promised, okay." Peter assured. Nine months without raw fish had been tough for you.

"Can you get me a spicy California roll?" You asked, your voice small.

"You're delivering our child, I'll get you as many rolls as you want," He assured you, pressing another kiss to your forehead.

If asked, you had no idea how much time passed when you began to push. There was pain, and lots of nurses guiding you. Peter stayed by your side, pushing your hair out of your eyes, constantly telling you how great you were doing.

You pushed many times, each time hoping it would be the last one. It wasn't until you heard the sounds of crying that it hit you: she was here.

It was a lot at once. The nurses were trying to talk to you over your baby's cries. You were trying to catch your breath after literally pushing a whole human out of you. But you did notice one thing.

That was Peter resting his forehead against yours, whispering, "you did it. She's beautiful, thank you." You looked to see tears coming down Peter's face while he had the biggest smile. You managed to smile back, his eyes and breathing grounding you.

"Where….where is she?" You asked.

"They're cleaning her up, they'll bring her soon." Peter said in-between the kisses he was pressing into the side of your face.

Your maternal instincts kicked in as you looked around, looking for her. You saw a nurse walking towards you, holding a small bundle that had been wrapped in a blanket. You stretched your arms out, ready. The nurse placed your daughter gently on your chest, allowing you and Peter to see her for the first time.

There she was, Sophia Gwendolyn Parker.

She had a head of brown hair, which explained the intense heartburn you experienced while pregnant. You joked with Peter that you hoped your kids would get his hair. Turns out his genetics agreed. She was squishy and red and you didn't care.

"Hey there," you cooed, "It's alright, you're okay baby girl."

Peter placed a hand over the one you had on Sophia's back. Your hand already looked large against her small back, but Peter's even more so.

Peter leaned down, gently placing a kiss on the top of Sophie's head.

"Hey there lovebug," he whispered to her. Your daughter immediately looked around, her eyes meeting Peter's.

"That's your daddy," you whispered to her, "Peter I think she recognized your voice."

"And your mom was making fun of me for having conversations with you the last nine months," Peter mummered, unable to take his eyes off his daughter who was looking at him with wonder.

You and Peter laid on the hospital bed as you bonded with Sophia. You were so focused on her you didn't even notice the nurses cleaning you up down there (which was honestly for the best, you'd rather not think about that).

"Alright Dad, you ready to hold her?" The nurse asked Peter.

Peter nodded, unbuttoning his shirt so quickly you were surprised no buttons were flying across the room.

The nurse gently placed Sophia on his chest, guiding his hands so one was on her back and the other was supporting her head.

Peter looked down to see Sophie, his daughter, resting her head on his chest.

As soon as you saw his lips quivering, you reached over (as best as you could), to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey Peter, guess what?"

"What?" He said softly, not taking his eyes off of Sophie.

"You're a dad now," you smiled, rubbing his shoulder.

He looked at you, revealing his watery eyes. He nodded his head, a soft "yeah" escaping his lips, as a few tears rolled down his face.

He always wanted a family. He always wanted to be a father. But after Gwen, he thought that was gone. It wasn't so much having a family with her (though at the time, it was a huge part), but also that he thought he didn't deserve one. How could he keep them safe if he had already failed to do that with the people he loved?

And then you came along and shook that conviction out of him. There was no one else either of you wanted to have kids with. Only each other.

Despite nine months of doctor visits, watching your belly grow, feeling Sophie kick, it wasn't until now that it hit him.

He was a father.

Peter looked at the little bundle he held in his arms. He wanted nothing more than to keep her there, safe from all the horrors of the world. He wanted her to stay this small forever but at the same time was excited at the thoughts of birthdays, milestones, and after school activities.

Was this how Uncle Ben felt? The past nine months reminded him of how much he missed his father.

If he could be half of what Ben was as a parent, he'd be content because he knew it meant Sophie would turn out just fine.

You rested your head against his shoulder, placing a hand on Sophie's back. The tears continued to roll down Peter's face, but he didn't mind. The big smile he had on his face made it clear the tears were of joy and not sadness.

The two of you sat on the hospital bed as you lovingly gazed at the little bundle of joy that had just become your whole world.

[soldmysoultootomeboys]

Obey Me Brothers Wedding HCS

Just some wedding headcanons for the boys bcuz i’m soft for them, Gn MC

Thinks about marrying Asmo => 😡💕💕

Lucifer

I can not stress how much this man would be a bridezilla

He’s probably the MOST high maintenance demon when it comes to this, even over Asmo

He gets so stressed over it too and when he's stressed he gets extremely snippy

It takes you knocking a little sense into him to get him back on track

He just wants your day to be perfect and with his brothers causing trouble it's hard to really focus on choosing a tablecloth

He won’t be any nicer to his brothers but he will try to avoid causing fights at this time simply because it's really important to him that ALL of his family is there. 

The night after proposing you find a beautiful envelope on white paper with gold trim in your room you realize it's a congratulation note from the celestial realm, presumably from the big man upstairs, it's still a heartstopping realization when you realize who your father in law technically is

Are you committing a sin marrying a fallen angel? Do you care?

It’s easier to ignore it than do anything else, although you do appreciate them registering for the coffee maker you had on your registry. You needed that. Mammon broke the last one.

Kindly begs asks you NOT to do anything crazy in the week leading up to it

Please MC his heart he's about to explode from stress please don't add to it, just for one week

Diavolo plans his bachelor party at the Fall with Barbatos. Invites you along and you have to explain how bachelor parties work

If it’s up to him the wedding will be all black with red accents eDgY mUcH?

At the altar he kisses you twice, first to show everyone that your his, the second time is just for you two, he hides you away from sight curling his black wings around you and holding you as close as he can bear

In the end it's a very happy celebration filled with good food, family, and friends

When you cut the cake feel free to smash a little bit in his face, this is your only chance, he'll be in too much of a good mood to retaliate...much

Mammon

Luxury luxury luxury

He wants solid gold altars, diamond encrusted bouquets, jewels imported from every corner of the world

He has so many plans (as well as a ridiculously long wedding registry)

But the moment you say you want anything he abandons them 

Whatever you want he wants, but if you wanted some diamonds too that would be great

He absolutely would be down for a wedding bouncy castle

He gets you the biggest diamond ring ever that he buys with his own money from a lot of shifts at Hell's kitchen and modelling gigs

He totally believes in the tradition of not seeing you until your wedding day but he also forgets so he walks in and as soon as he realizes you're getting ready he shuts his eyes and tries to run out. He'll only talk to you from behind the door. 

When he sees you walking down the aisle he falls in love all over again. And he feels like that a hundred different moments. It doesn't matter what you're doing, playing with your veil, wiping cake off the corner of your mouth, yawning, he loves you and loves that you’re his.

He could get married to you in a ditch and still be the happiest man in the world.

He's an absolute goofball and is smiling the entire time

The couple that during their wedding night end up jumping on the bed and having pillow fights while play wrestling

Levi

You really want to marry a gross otaku like him??? Why??

Not that he's complaining! He just doesn't get it. His brothers are so cool and Asmo is so much prettier than him and he doesn't have anything to offer.

It takes a lot of reassuring to convince that this is what you want to do

You two have this same conversation about a million times before the wedding. He just doesn't get why you actually like him. Once it finally sets in that this really is happening and it's not just some big joke he gets really into it and definitely puffs up around his brothers to show off

His first thought is a cosplay wedding and he'll beg for it to be Ruri-chan themed

Good luck getting Lucifer or any of his brothers to agree to dressing up, as funny as it may be

If you shoot that down it's pretty easy to convince him to do something else since mostly he's just excited to be with you

He still has a little Ruri pin on his suit collar and cufflinks

When you walk down the aisle he feels like he’s going to faint from nerves and when it’s time for vows he pulls out a huge list of all the reasons he loves you and why your his Henry, although about half of it compares things you’ve done to things in TSL

He only makes it through a quarter of the way before he gets embarrassed

When he lifts your veil he panics because your so pretty and he can’t handle it

You have to initiate the kiss and when you do he turns as red as a tomato

He tries to play it off but keep a strong arm around his waist unless he really does decide to pass out

He cools down once you guys are at the reception and gets especially excited the little custom made toppers of you two in cartoon form

Satan

He's a bridezilla but in the lightest sense of the word

He won't get upset over mix ups or even really wedding stuff like Asmo or Lucifer but his temper will be extremely fine during this time, especially when it comes to his brothers.

Throws an entire table through the window when Lucifer asks him if he knew where Mammon was

It’s a lot of stress to create the perfect wedding and he buries his nose in different books that can help him

He’s a bit of a perfectionist

The most classic and elegant wedding ever and he’d want to be involved in every step of the way

Very interested in your opinion and if it compares to human weddings

He flushes with pride whenever you compliment something he picked out

Includes casual literary references in his wedding but only so people who really know will realize

Wears a navy suit 

Asmo

Also a bridezilla and a petty one at that

There will be drama, there will be tears, there will be a part where he cries off his mascara because Andrealphus of the damned brought the white bouquets and he wanted the PINK ones. This is HIS day why is she trying to ruin it.

It’s a lot of work trying to keep the damage to a minimal

Part of the reason he gets so upset is because this is your day too and he wants it to be perfect. 

Prepare for a million dress rehearsals.

He wants to help pick out your outfit and makeup! But he also doesn't want to break human tradition...But he wants to help pick out your outfit and makeup so bad!!

If he manages to restrain himself he picks out the makeup artist and the stylizer because he knows what makeup you like and what looks best on your skin.

Most likely tho he'll want to see anyways and bugs you to let him in

You compromise by going shopping with him as he tries on a million dresses and suits

MC the suit on the right or the one on the left?

They both look exactly the same.

"...Left love." "That's exactly what I was thinking. I knew I could trust you to pick out the right answer!"

Even though he's very good at fashion your opinion matters a lot to him. Sure he could make himself look perfect but he wants to look perfect for YOU. He wants to be your version of perfect and if that means he picks the high cut dress instead of the low cut which flatters his waist better then he'll do it. For you.

He's the type to want to have all the spotlight on him so if you're walking down the aisle he's going to do it too! He does it first. HE says for the attention. In reality he wants to be able to see you the moment you step out the doors and down that hall.

Looks super perfect as he waits for you at the aisle but the moment you get married he starts ugly crying. He throws his veil back on so no one can see it but you just lift it up and kiss away his tears.

Even though it's a lot of work it's worth it to be with the demon you love...but if you shove cake in his face he'll seriously kill you, MC do you know how long this took?!!!!! :'(

Beel

He’s more than happy to do whatever you want

Whatever vision you have he's willing to make happen

He does his best but feels a little useless since keeps having to break for snacks

Wonders why you’d want to be with him when all he ever does it eat but he tries not to bring it up in case it would upset you

He honestly does have a lot of fun planning with you and his favorite part was when you got to taste test different cakes because he got to impress you by explaining all the little differences between each one

He ends up being in charge of everything food related and it helps him feel a bit better

Barbatos ends up cooking the dishes 

During the rehearsal he falls in love with you all over again and doesn’t want to let you go the entire time

He gets especially nervous during the month of the wedding

He starts stress eating, going through even more food than normal, but then he gets worried about fitting into his suit and starts working out even more than normal, which makes him hungry again. It’s a terrible cycle

Belphie manages to break him out of it by reminding Beel that you love him more than anyone else

Even though its his wedding he starts setting up just to get out some of his nervous tension until the others shoo him back inside

A huge 20 layer cake each tier a different flavor

He has his own personal cake that's even bigger than the other cake but he’s more than willing to share with you

You two do the cute bit where you smash cake in each others faces

Beel still eats it tho

As much as he loves his family he's so happy to be able to steal you away at the end

Belphie

Planning a wedding is sooo much work

He lets you choose whatever you want as long as you let him sleep

if it was up to him he'd want a small informal celebration with his family but if you want something bigger than he guesses it's fine. As long as he doesn't have to talk to anyone like Diavolo 

He uninvites Lucifer like three times, each time using extremely formal paper with beautiful cursive that must have taken hours. When Lucifer confronts him Belphie just says that it’s too late because he already gave away his seat. 

He only brings him back when you make him

He sleeps more than usual in the weeks leading up to the wedding. You think it’s because of the stress but in actuality he’s trying to save up his sleep so he’s more awake for the ceremony

As much as he may act like he doesn’t care, he really does want to marry you and it makes him happy to think that you’re going to be all his

Beel is obviously his best man and while Belphie waits for you to come down the aisle he leans against him to take a small nap. Or that's what he had planned. The moment the music starts he perks up and finds himself unable to even close his eyes, too fixated on the doors about to open. 

Feeds you the first bite of cake and then just...doesn't stop

He’s so in love with you all he can do is stare

Gives his slice of cake to Beel he'd much rather pay attention to you than eat

However he does smash a little in your face but it’s out of love <3

[fbfh]

Light Up the Dark - [IV] Leo x reader

genre: romance + action + enemies to lovers kinda

word count: 2k

au: none

pairing: Leo x gothy!child of eros!fem reader

requested: nah

warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR HEROES OF OLYMPUS!!, normal reader being mean lol, mentions of abandonment issues, a breakup over skype call basically, reader uses  seduction powers for fun and profit, i think that’s it

summary: You pull some strings to get a hotel room and some cash, the boys get to know you a little better, and you overhear something you probably shouldn’t have.

listen to: bad liar - imagine dragons

a/n: since the reader is a daughter of Eros, the characters are aged to 18+ idk i think i forgot to put that on the other chapters lol 

also requests r open uwu

“What do you mean she’s not coming?” Leo asks, all the bad feelings quickly overtaking him. 

“She said she wanted to sight see more, and that she’d meet us back at camp in a few days,” Jason says, trying to break the news as gently as possible, “I’m sorry, Leo.”

He bit back his heartache.

“Yeah, it’s…” 

The door creaks and their heads turn to you, exiting the front door. 

“Who’s driving?” you ask.

“Jason,” Leo replies. You open the passenger side door, gently place the coffin shaped box on the seat, and buckle it in. You can feel their inquisitive eyes on you, and you counter with a blank, resolute look of your own.

“This one’s special.” 

You notice Leo seems… off. His whole mood seems to have plummeted. Leo reminds you of a buoy. Even in the worst storms, even if he gets caught under a huge wave, he always comes back to the surface. Based on his current vibe, someone nuked the buoy. Wheels turn in your head, and you hand him the trout mailbox. 

“Could you put this in the back?” you direct your words at him, hoping the heat flushing to his cheeks would distract him from whatever made him upset. His hand brushes yours and you can almost feel his heart spasm. You make eye contact at him through your thick, dark eyelashes and he almost chokes. He agrees and you pull Jason aside. 

“What happened?” you hiss. 

“What?” he whispers back.

“What did you tell him to make him all lame?”

“Oh, uh…” he rubs the back of his neck and you shake your head, waiting for an answer, “Calypso’s… not coming back with us.”  You wait in silence for him to keep talking. 

“She said she wanted to see the world more, and she’d meet us back at camp in a few days.” You process this for a second.

“So he’s-” you catch movement out of the corner of your eye, “driving?” you ask Leo, who just came back from the trunk.

“Jason, I mean.” you clarify. He confirms, and you all get in the car - Jason up front, you and Leo in the back. You reach into your bag and hand Jason a cd that says ’fun sad angry music :)’. He stares at you through the rear view mirror. You stare back. You sip your coffee. 

“Well?” you ask, “Are you going to put it in the player or eat it?” His eyes dart to Leo’s. “She gets to choose the music,” he explains. Jason mutters in agreement and fumbles the disk into the slot. A smile spreads on your face as the music plays and he starts to drive. 

Leo watches you as you nod your head and mouth the lyrics. He can tell you love this song. You vibe to the music for a minute before glancing over at Leo. He realizes he’s been staring when you give him an expectant look.

“What.” you ask. 

“Uh, this song is really good,” interest tints your face, and he’s relieved he recovered okay, “what’s it called?” You’re a little surprised he likes it.

“Mr. Doctor Man by Palaye Royale.” You two enjoy the music in silence, Jason focused on the road and GPS directions. A minute later, your curiosity starts to get the better of you. “How far is it?” 

“Not far, a couple hours.” Leo replies.

“Is everyone there all… campfire songs and friendship bracelets? Cause I’ve never been like, a summer camp person,” your eyes flick to the side towards him for a moment, and he can tell you’re listening closely. He smiles a little. 

“So what kind of person are you?”

“I’m more of a… cult documentaries and obscure unsettling 1960’s Czech animations type.” He’d never heard the words “1960’s Czech animations” sound so hot. 

“What about you?”

He paused for a minute. Part of him was deciding how to respond, and the other part was just flattered giggling that she had asked him back. You talk for the next hour or two, Jason chiming in periodically, until he points out that it’s getting dark and you should find somewhere to stay for the night. 

“Okay,” you reply, “pull over at the next truck stop.” 

They’re a little confused, but Jason complies and pulls over at the next gas station/convenience store you come across. They watch you get out of the car without a word and walk into the store. You approach a guy near a soda display. He has on a fedora and a shirt with a kids video game logo on it. He stares at you absolutely transfixed. They can’t hear what you’re saying, but he has a dopey grin on his face and nods his head a lot. Your hand touches his arm gently, and he laughs so loudly (and nervously) they hear it from the car. 

“Do I look that dumb around her?” Leo asks. 

You tilt your head and he blushes and nods again. He hands you something and a second later, you two walk to the counter. The cashier looks up startled, and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. She stares at you for a second, then says something and fumbles with a cellphone you hand her. She hands you a paper a few seconds later. You give the guy his phone back. He walks to an ATM at the corner of the store. He walks over to you, but you’re in front of a display so they can’t see anything until you come back out. You get back in the car and hand Jason a piece of paper and a wad of cash.

“Got us a room at a Best Western like, ten minutes away. And some cash.” 

They stare at you in silence. You lean toward Jason. 

“The room is under your name, Kevin Grossman.” Leo bites back a laugh. 

You finally get to the hotel, and Jason flips on his turn signal to get into the parking lot. “Park at the Walmart over there,” you point a block or two up, “under a light.” He turns his blinker off. 

“Walmart doesn’t care if you park overnight. If someone sees our car at the parking lot of a hotel, we’re just leaving a target on our backs.” you explain. They don’t say anything. 

“You said monsters are after us, right?” 

“Yeah,” Leo said, “good thinking.” Jason agreed and you exit the car, remembering to grab the duffle bag with your clothes and other essentials. You all walk across the street to the hotel. You talk your way through checking in pretty easily. When the hostess asks to see your in app registry you hand her the printed ticket. “His phone died.” you say simply. The three of you are about to head up to your room, when you turn back to reception. You hesitate for a second, before leaning in to the receptionist.

“Can you put us as unlisted?” you ask quietly. 

“Of course,” she replies sincerely, “let me know if you need anything.”

On the way up to your room, you tell Jason and Leo that if anyone asks, you’re not here. They seem impressed. Your room has a small seating area with a couch, coffee table, coat rack, and a phone. Past the half wall are three beds, a desk, a TV, and a doorway you figure leads to the bathroom. You walk into the bathroom and touch the mirror. You notice the space between your finger and reflection, and move on. You call to Leo to turn off the lights. He and Jason share a look. You may be a little weird, and incredibly intimidating, but you haven’t steered them wrong yet. Leo hits the lights, and you said quietly, “Listen for any weird buzzing or beeping noises, and look out for any out of place lights,” you creep around the room very quietly. After a minute you turn the lights back on and look at the ceiling.

“What was that about?” Jason asks.

“Bugs,” you reply, not looking at him, “and not the fun kind,” you mutter. 

“Jason, can you reach that?” you point up at the smoke detector. He looked between you and the device on the ceiling. 

“Don’t think so.” You looked between him and Leo. Your head might hit the ceiling if you Jason gave you a boost, but you could probably access it fine with Leo’s help. 

“Leo,” you said, and he looked up from the wires he was fiddling with, “give me boost,” your gaze not leaving the smoke detector. He agrees, and you get up onto his shoulders. His hands rest just above your knees, and it takes all his focus to not burst into flames. You pop off the cover.

“This doesn’t look weird, right?” you ask him. He looks up and back at your face, hair angled down, and is reminded of the Spiderman kiss. He pushes away the thought and examines the smoke detector. 

“About as non-weird as a smoke detector can look,” he confirms, and helps you down. He’s incredibly impressed that you thought to look for bugs - even he hadn’t thought of that, and he’s a son of Hephaestus. 

“Where did you learn this stuff? The parking lot, being unlisted, checking for bugs?” You half exhale half scoff.

“When almost everyone in a five mile radius constantly wants to get in your pants, they can get… pushy… so you learn some stuff.” You grab your pajamas from your bag and head toward the bathroom. Leo and Jason meet eyes. It made more sense now, why you were always so intimidating. If he got constant unwanted attention, Leo would get pretty prickly, too. 

Once everyone had showered and gotten ready for bed, Jason pointed out someone should IM Chiron, but you were way too tired, and collectively agreed to update him in the morning. 

Right as he’s about to fall asleep, Leo feels like someone’s watching him. He opens his eyes, and sees Calypso’s face. His heart lurches. He pushes himself out of bed and sees the shimmery edges of the iris message. She opens her mouth and he holds a finger to his lips. He moves over to the couch, so he doesn’t wake the others. He sits down nervously.

“Hey, sunshine… I really miss you, what’s-” 

“Look, Leo, I… I can’t do this.” 

His stomach drops. 

He knows what’s happening. He had it coming, he knew that. He knew that this was probably inevitable. Still, that didn’t make it hurt any less. He tries to sputter out something, anything. Why, what, can he do anything to fix this, but he’s too choked up. 

“I need a break from this, from us…” she continues, “there’s so much of the world I haven’t seen yet, and you have your projects… I don’t want to hold myself back because I feel bad that you’re not with me. I want to experience everything.” He feels like he’s falling forward. His eyebrows knit and an unstoppable rush of memories of everyone who’s left him or kicked him out comes flooding back. 

“Calypso,” his voice cracks. He can’t finish the sentence. 

You wake up from the light sleep you had settled into, aware of an unfamiliar voice. You get up, throwing on the short black robe over your pajamas - despite their velvet material, the loose cami and shorts don’t provide much warmth. You tiptoe over to the seating area. Leo’s on the couch, staring at the floor. You walk up behind him and place a hand on his shoulder. 

“You okay?” you ask, your voice foggy with sleep. 

“Who-” you briefly see the unfamiliar voice is coming from a shimmery image of a pissed off girl floating in front of him, but he quickly swipes his hand through, and the image vanishes. He rubs his eyes and his hands come away damp. You stay quiet. You don’t want to make him feel worse. 

“Long day,” he mutters. He stands up and says goodnight without looking at you. You watch him get into bed, and you do the same. Even if you knew what was wrong, there wasn’t much you could do this late at night. You hope some rest makes him feel better, and tell yourself it’ll be dealt with in the morning. 

Maybe over coffee. 

You could use some coffee.

[dates101]

The Stargazing Date

Summer is only here for a couple of months, which means you need to take advantage of these warm summer nights. What better way to do so then cuddling up under the stars, Nicholas Sparks style? 

The Date

Like most of my date ideas, preparation is key. First is location, i.e where you'll be looking up at the stars. The most common place would be a public park, although somewhere more rural would work out better (the less light pollution, the more visible the stars). If your city supports Earth Day, I would highly recommend doing it then, as the city participates in a brief no electricity time period. Well at least that's what my city does, do you even have Earth Day in your city? I’m going to pretend the answer to that is yes and you totally know what I’m talking about. You should also pick a night that wont be very cloudy. Planning everything just to have it ruined by a cloudy night would literally be the worst thing ever. Ok so we have the location, next is the necessities. Are you going to watch in your car? In the bed of a truck? On a blanket in the grass? Majority of you will probably pick the latter, so we’ll go with that. Lastly you should bring a couple of snacks, some extra blankets just in case, a pillow or two, a portable speaker with romantic music, maybe some drinks, and most importantly bug spray! Yes, I said bug spray. It may kill the ambiance for a brief second but most people forget that bugs are a thing during the summer, especially at night. And I don't want my lovely readers being eaten alive by mosquitos. Ok so you're laying under the stars..... what now?

Star Light Star Bright

You're going to get really romantic for this one, yay! Play that music, get under those covers and cuddle up with your significant other. Talk about life, talk about your day, the future, something funny that happened, your deepest darkest secrets, make out, anything you want really. It’s just the two of you and the stars. In this exact moment, nobody else exists. But what about the stars themselves? Well, you could bring a telescope, and I think that would be really cool! However, they are expensive ranging from $50-$150 so only get one if you plan on using it more than once. Thats a lot of money to spend on one date. An alternative would be downloading a stargazing app on your phone. If your location data is turned on, the app will actually pin point the constellations for you! So you can take turns locating them, which is actually a lot of fun.

Wrap Up

And that's the Stargazing Date. Realistically this date could be completely free, and just requires a little bit of cash to make it really nice (or a lot of cash if you so wish). And for you Nicholas Sparks fans out there, yes I’m going to answer the elephant in the room (I’m looking at you “A Walk To Remember”). Naming a Star costs around $50-$100 depending on what registry you go to. If you decide to do this, you've hit romantic overload, and will definitely make a memorable moment you two will share forever. But with that being said, I only recommend this to couples who have been seeing each other for a VARY long time. Nothing says “moving too fast” like naming a star for someone on the first few dates. Also, unfortunately the star isn't officially named the name you pick. In fact, the same star could have multiple “unique” names from different agencies. It’s sad to hear, but I wanted to let you know before you dropped a lot of money. At least you still get a really cool looking certificate!

Remember, make every date a story.

-Dates101 

[watchtheblog]

the girlfriend experience

my birthday is coming up (september 26) so i wrote 1200 words about nonsense so that i could bury a birthday wish list at the bottom of this, rather than tastelessly flaunting the fact that i’ve compiled a list of things i would let strangers buy me for my birthday… which i do every single year!

(if you came here looking for the blog about being ghosted, here.)

                                                          *******

it is my understanding that “dating” is “eating dinner with someone who wants to fuck you until they actually get to fuck you and then you just get really invested in serialized television shows and have sex until the next ‘yanny/laurel’ debate inevitably tears you apart.”

it is also my understanding that once i meet someone i like, he’s my boyfriend so, historically, “dating” has been me interviewing someone to be a handyman i’ll pay in kisses.

but i am an ever-evolving, discombobulated little bug, so i recently gave *auditioning to be someone’s girlfriend* a chance.

please strap in and come along on this journey through what it is like for me to go on one single date as a person who cannot complete any task without overthinking it to the point of absolute ruin because her brain is a defective rube goldberg machine.

(if you don’t care, please scroll to the end to find the list of things i’d like for my birthday (and then do with that information what you will). if you care a lot, please also check out what it’s like inside my brain when i have to go to a party.)

A SUITABLE DATE

i have a v specific “type” from which i never stray. the main sine qua non are: over 6’3”, 200lbs+, 45+, appears to be afflicted with a football related brain injury, will disrespect me, not currently under the influence of essential oils.

further than this, what i’m also looking for in a man is someone with at least one divorce under his belt, an angry ex wife, 1-4 kids, and a complete inability to figure out what makes me happy (but someone who is in relentless pursuit of that formula).

six men meet these requirements.

THE PLAN FOR THE DATE 

i prefer to make plans with 2 - 5 hours notice because this effectively mitigates the chance of me cancelling, but this often isn’t feasible because other people have lives that don’t only involve sitting at home waiting to take me out on a date.

also, people who make plans like this are usually trying to hook up, and as we all know… i don’t even fuck!

so a date is scheduled in 2-3 days — any farther in advance i cannot plan without first consulting a psychic and my hormones’ advisory board. 

THE LEAD UP TO THE DATE

i can do nothing but spiral. i wonder if my date is on another date, if i can compete with this hypothetical other date, if i should cancel because i’m certain no one will ever love me as much as my ex, if i should cancel just to be problematic, or to exert cancelling power, or to perpetuate cancel culture?!

no, don’t cancel. we could fall in love and be really happy for a few years, and then i could get really into learning to cook or become a pilot or something. anyway, worst case scenario: he doesn’t like me, and i obsess about him for 400x the length of our courtship… but on the plus: i get to talk about him on the internet forever!

should i go blonde? should i wear a wig? i wonder if there will be hotdogs on the menu at the restaurant.

how can i unlearn every repellent personality quirk i’ve developed from birth in the next 48 hours? 

“how do you… kiss?” i wonder, right before i consider tranqing myself.

luckily, i am promptly choked to the point of syncope by these thoughts of uncertainty and self doubt. 

DAY OF DATE PREP

eventually, by the grace of God, i wake up on the morning of the date.

getting ready for anything i’ve ever done in my entire life, including a black tie wedding, has taken me 9 minutes, but i’m going to spend 2 hours sitting in a chair next to someone i’m not going to fuck, so i’ve chosen to block out a full 10 hours for no reason.

i fill the day applying every type of scrub and mask to my face, body, and hair. i try on every item of clothing i have accumulated over the past 5 years, including a $20,000 couture tom ford gown that a celebrity i forget once wore to a televised award show.

i’m now trying on sweatpants. i’ve put a heel on. “who is stopping me from wearing this?” i ask myself, knowing no one is stopping me from leaving my house and going on a date with a man i could easily get to fall in love with me in 2 hours if i don’t show up to dinner dressed like i just came from a fashionnova casting.

~ wow, time really does fly when you’re watching all your neuroses exit your body to perform a recital for you ~

moments before i have to cut this shit out and decide on something to wear, i lather my entire body in the richest lotion i can find, which notably takes 4-6 hours to sink in.

now it’s time to wiggle into the only outfit i ever leave my house after sunset wearing - a pair of black jeans that i’ll never fit into and a baby’s white tee shirt.

oh. we’re now not going to a restaurant. dinner is at his house.

i set myself on fire.

THE DATE

i am v rude for the first 45 minutes because i have no manners.

no. it’s because i’m nervous, and thus if i’m not cantankerous, filling the space with my shitty attitude, i will have nothing to say because my mind erased all logical ideation as soon as i stepped foot in this man’s home.

it becomes clear that this behavior will no longer be tolerated, so i pivot before i’m cancelled. i change the narrative. i’m nice now.

usually, when i find myself at a man’s house, the only thing i’m thinking is “please don’t have an acoustic guitar” and that thought repeats ad infinitum until i am free… but i know this man does not have an acoustic guitar (or i assume), so all i’m thinking is “does this man like the personality i’ve whipped up for him using a recipe i found in a cosmo from 2002??!”

he does to some degree - or he’s pretending - because he asks to see me again (yay!), and then shows me his house, and then my favorite part comes…

we kiss. 

we kiss and i’ve forgotten entirely how to kiss. literally no idea. never heard of it. i am a human shrug emoji.

“i don’t know how to do this.” - me, talking about kissing to the man i’m “kissing”.

he seems unbothered by this - more acting! - because we move locations, and he is doing his thing while i continue to be an oral cadaver.

that stops for a reason that seems natural and not because he realizes i am an embalmed corpse. and we talk, and that’s nice because my brains have returned for a brief guest appearance.

and then i leave, excited because i like him and it feels like he likes me. 

in the uber, he texts me the same thing he texted me before the last time i never heard from him again... and then i never hear from him again!*

and that, my friends, is a date!

*(i’m kidding. i heard from him one more time. he was cancelling plans we’d made to hang out!!) 

                                                       **

thanks for reading - or scrolling prodigiously - here are some things i’m interested in receiving for my birthday:

(if for some perverse reason you’d like to see my prior innocent but spectacularly misguided registries, please go here. it’s a doozy! however, please note i will only be accepting gifts from this year’s registry. so stay current!)

THE LIST

1. someone bullied me out of leasing a car i really wanted and so now i have no car which is unfortunate. would be nice if someone would throw half the cost of this vehicle at the mercedes store so i could pay a small amount every month to drive this until i’m bored of it in 9 months. it would also be nice if the inside were red because that’s a new kink i have - red leather seats.

2. i can’t tell if it’s basic to want this, but i also do not care at all. it’s perfectly sized to carry all of the 300 notebooks i scribble in. apparently it’s possible to have your name embroidered in lieu of the brand’s… that would be nice; my name is mercedes.

i also like this even though it looks like the only thing it can hold is a small stack of x-rays…

or this. (definitely indisputably basic. but again. i don’t care.)

this is cute

3. one of these dresses even though the only things i do are go on vacation or lie in bed. i’m a size 0 or 34 or whatever the smallest size is.

option one, option two, option three, option four (for the zero people considering purchasing a gift for me. this is my favorite, of course, because i am insane), option five 

4. a vacation - because (see above) i don’t like to be in los angeles for longer than 10 days at a time. here are some ideas:

a local vacation, a vacation in montana, a vacation in mexico. also in mexico. also in mexico.

5. either of these v big suitcases (vacation things!)

6. these shoes or these shoes. i’m a size 38.

7. gift card for an in home massage or one a week for the month of september? up to you!

8. any of these candles. they’re the only candles i’ll allow in my home now, so please don’t stray.

9. a book. i love to read, and i thought it would be nice to remind you i’m a thoughtful and educated thot.

have never read this. one of my favorites but have only read on my iPad... sad! first edition of the aforementioned

10. a necklace. a custom one (18 inch) or this long thing

misc:

an erewhon gift card, this perfume, or this perfume, a robe, a weekly delivery of macarons…

[missoulapestcontrol]

Bed Bugs (Heteroptera)

It is not unusual to encounter bed bugs in Western Montana. With so many people traveling from around the world in search of the true Montana experience, bed bugs may unfortunately be traveling with them. It is important to know a little bit about bed bugs in order to best avoid them.

Bed bugs are small, nearly wingless, flattened bugs that feed on humans as an external parasite. Other closely related species feed on bats (bat bugs), cliff swallows, woodpeckers, raptors, chickens and other types of birds (bird bugs). Thankfully, bed bugs cannot transmit any diseases but they are quite a nuisance.

When traveling, try to be bed bug aware and check your room when staying in a hotel. Or if you’ve traveled recently and have been waking up with bites, inspect your own home to see if bed bugs have hitchhiked back with you. Focus on the furniture used for lounging and sleeping.

Bed bugs can hide almost anywhere, but generally stay closest to their food source. Look in the small crevices of solid structures such as joints in a headboard, bed frame or couch. Be sure to check under heating devices and around heating vents. Also look behind pictures hanging on the wall, between and behind any books or magazines in close proximity to the bed. You may have to turn some of the furniture over and examine the underside.

If you’ve inspected all of the above but still feel like you could be missing something, be proactive and move your focus towards the bed. Strip the bed of all sheets so you can inspect the mattress and box spring (if there is one). Examine the top, bottom and all sides while paying special attention to the edges, seams and labels. Bed bugs are extremely good at hiding in all of these areas and can be easily overlooked. If you don’t see any bed bugs or dark colored flecks, you are most likely bed bug free. If you do find bed bugs, call a professional and get a treatment plan started.

Bed bugs are one of the most profitable bugs in the pest control industry. As a more expensive pest to have professionally treated, many homeowners try to self-treat using diatomaceous earth or steamers. While steamers are effective at over 120 degrees, they only kill bed bugs with direct contact. Contact killers help lower the population, however in order to truly eliminate a bed bug infestation, a homeowners best bet is to contact a pest control professional.

While awaiting your scheduled bed bug treatment, try the following trick to trap them:

•    Place a heating pad on the floor with sticky traps around it. If you don’t have sticky traps you can use duct tape, sticky side up. Put an Alka-Seltzer tablet on a damp sponge on a small plate on the heating pad. The Alka-Seltzer will attract any bed bugs in the area.

If you have any questions, please contact HoldFast Enviro Pest Solutions @ (406) 203-2615 or contact us on our website: http://www.holdfastpestsolutions.com/

[ataraxia-807]

Ali and ash talk about marriage

It long so it’s under a cut.

“So, I have a question.”

Ali stood up from leaning over the sink, splashing water on her face. “What?”

“I have a question.”

Ali leaned out from the bathroom, wiping her cheek with a wash rag. “What’s that?”

Ashlyn looked up from her iPad, tapping the pencil on the screen. “Over or under two carats?”

“Carrots?” Ali asked, splashing more water on her face. “What am I? Bugs Bunny?”

“No,” Ashlyn said, her voice echoing through the room and into the bathroom. “I mean as a ring.”

Ali stood up at the sink, staring at her own reflection. Surely….

“Wait… are you —“

“Come here,” Ashlyn said, patting the comforter next to her.

Ali smiled, unsure. “Um…”

“Just come here dummy.”

Ali walked into the bedroom, passing by Logan’s bed on the floor where the huge year old dog was sleeping. She leaned down to give her a good belly rub as she looked at Ashlyn, gauging her reaction. “What are you talking about?”

Ashlyn turned the iPad around and Ali only had to get a glimpse of that Tiffany blue. “Ashlyn.”

“Ali.” Ashlyn looked back down at her iPad. “I think you’re an emerald, right?”

Ali sank down onto the bed, leaning against her legs. “Erm.”

“Or,” Ashlyn started, tapping the screen a few times before turning the screen back toward Ali, “Are you a princess cut?”

Ali took the iPad, looking down at the picture on the screen. It was an absolutely gorgeous ring, without question; a large, princess cut center diamond with smaller stones on either side of the band. In the display, it was matched with an adorned wedding band, the platinum twisted together into an elegant knot. Ali could feel her heart beating faster, thrumming against her ribcage. 

“So what do you think?”

Ali turned her head to look at her, smiling softly. “I think we’re talking about something kind of big.”

Ashlyn looked back at the screen, her eyes going wide. “I mean, not too big though, right? I mean, I guess I could back down a little, but at least a carat and a half.”

“Don’t be an ass,” Ali said, swatting her arm. She let her hand slide down to take Ashlyn’s, chewing her lip with a smile while looking at her. “We’re talking about this, huh?”

“Mhm,” Ashlyn said, returning a soft smile. She rubbed the back of Ali’s hand with her thumb, reaching out with the other to hold her cheek. “I know we’ve ... You know, back in - in Colorado when --”

Ali squeezed her hand reassuringly. “This is different,” she said.

“It is,” Ashlyn said, her eyes earnest. “Ali, I’ve loved you for years now, and I’m pretty sure I’m going to love you for all of the ones I have left.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be down on one knee?” Ali asked with a grin, feeling butterflies in her stomach.

“The bed is more comfortable,” Ashlyn said, and when Ali’s eyes went wide she chuckled. “No, this is not that moment.”

“But we’re talking about that moment,” Ali said, looking back down at the picture. “And we’re talking about all of the moments after.”

“If that’s what you want -- all of those moments with me.”

Ali took the iPad off of Ashlyn’s lap, sliding it to the other side of the bed as she maneuvered to straddle her. They sat up together, Ali wrapping her arms around Ashlyn’s shoulders and kissing her forehead, nose, both cheeks and finally her mouth. She lingered, imagining a moment in the future where they would kiss like this in front of a priest and their family and friends. 

Ali pressed her forehead to Ashlyn’s, whispering softly, “I want all of them.”

They stayed that way for a long time, holding each other and talking softly about their ideas for a wedding, what to put on a registry, and where to go on their honeymoon. Ali could hardly remember how it felt to be afraid of this idea, committing her life to being Ashlyn’s wife, and instead only felt like it couldn’t come soon enough.

[youcantkillamutant]

The Mystery of the Golden Fang: Part 1, The Collision

Author: youcantkillamutant

Fandom: Marvel (Black Panther)

Pairing: Erik Stevens/Killmonger x Black!OC

Summary: A girl stumbles into another world. A baby disappears. A private investigator wonders if this will be the case he can’t solve.

Warnings: Mentions of blood, cursing

Words: 4.5K+

A/N: So…here’s another one of those AU’s that absolutely no one asked for! I only own my original characters of course, Marvel don’t sue me I’m broke.

Listening to: December 2914 by James Vincent McMorrow, Suite IV: Electric Overture by Janelle Monae, and Teeth by Lady Gaga

Part 1: The Collision

—l—

There are worlds outside our own. Alternate realities tucked into the consciousness of animals, universes scattered across the floor like marbles, otherworldly creatures tipped into mugs of tea. There are worlds that mirror each other, worlds that run alongside one another, worlds that twist and curve around each other. And then there are the worlds that collide, converging at a point so powerful every piece of life around falls into its orbit.

—l—

Earth Stream 245: September 30, 2040

9:02PM

The town of Ortega is a small one. Expensive in most parts, its residents the relatives of CEO’s and sons of lawyers. Mostly dominated by suburbs, the town has one large center. It’s home to a small mall of boutiques and specialized shops, even housing a small spa and gym. Which is where Hazel Fay finds herself. At work in the care center of that exclusive spa, watching the kids that are left by their parents for an hour or two of relaxation.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to drive you home Hazel?” Hazel and Trish had just finished their shift at the care center. With all the kids gone home and everything clean the duo flicked off the lights and made their way to the exit. The door to the cheery room locked behind them, they chatted as they made their way down the hallway.

“I’ll be fine Trish, it’s only a 15 minute walk. And I make it every Wednesday and Thursday.” Trish didn’t look convinced, but nodded along with the younger woman. She’s old enough to make her own choices, besides, she’s been doing this walk since she started at the center two years ago.

“Just text me when you get home.”

“You got it. Drive safe!” Hazel slipped a headphone into her ear and set off into the night, pausing for a moment to take in the bright, full moon.  

After admiring the moon for a moment longer, Hazel set off. It had been a busy night and she was nearly dead on her feet. The sooner she got home, the better. She made her way through the business center, dodging trash cans and sneaking more glimpses of the moon. Hazel pulled out her headphone as she passed the closing shops. Waving to their owners as she passed by and shouting a few remarks. She promised to stop in and make conversation the next time she had a shift, but Hazel was just too tired to think of anything but her warm, soft bed. That is, until she heard the telltale whines of a baby.

She had just made it past the entrance to the Golden Fang, a bar Hazel refused to even think about considering its less than PG clientele, and heard the baby’s muffled whimpers from the alleyway to the right of the building. For a second Hazel thought she might be going crazy. This wouldn’t be the first time she’s heard cries that weren’t there. Working with kids day in and day out give you the entirely unhelpful ability to hear phantom cries everywhere you go.

Hazel almost continued walking past that dark alley, pointing her feet in the direction of home and bed before she reconsidered. She’d never be able to sleep if she knew she might have left a baby in the alley next to a seedy nightclub. Passing the blinking neon sign of a curved fang, Hazel travelled down the alleyway with caution. Keys laced between her fingers and pointed outwards like claws, phone flashlight on and ready to dial 911 if need be.

By the time Hazel got to the baby, cuddled in a black leather jacket with a bright golden jaguar glittering on the back, she pocketed her phone and dropped her keys in her bag with relief. At least the baby was real.

“What are you doing out here all alone bug?” Hazel scooped the baby up from the ground and cuddled the baby close, blocking the sudden breeze that whipped over them.

—l—

Earth Stream 947: September 30, 2040

11:02PM

The Metropolis is the biggest VampCity in the country. Gleaming with flashing lights and glutted with humans and vampires alike it is the birthplace of Vampire law and order. After vampirism swept through nurseries of the poor and wealthy alike centuries ago, human lawmakers became nervous about the demographic they had no information about. There was no data to mine until the groups aged out of childhood, infancy protecting that first group of vampires for barely a decade before they were tested and experimented on.

It only took a few more years for Vamps to get their rights, most of the humans in power were easily persuaded or replaced. It was even easier to tilt the laws in their favor when the human population began to drop a century ago. Growing outnumbered, the human faction became even more adamant about the evolution of the laws, so that they might find more protection in their twisted system. Humans claimed to need protection from the bloodthirsty beasts, creating a registry and curfew for humans and vampires alike.

Vampirism is nothing more than a genetic mutation; strengthening the muscles, slowing the aging process and of course leaving those affected with a particularly strong bloodlust. It was at sanguine societies, bloody boulangerie’s and blood clubs where those voracious vampires could sate their appetite. N’Jadaka Udaku owns The Golden Fang, the longest standing and most popular blood club in the Metropolis.

The vamp’s have been around longer than he’d care to admit, whoring, dancing, and drinking from the daintiest necks around the world. Still he always found himself drawn back to The Golden Fang. His first and only baby. Back in the day he had spent nearly a year constructing the club; laying slick marble floors, lacing the walls with mirrors, hanging an obscene amount of crystal chandeliers…He remembered the day of the opening, when he hung the solid gold jaguar head above the door, jagged lettering beneath it welcoming all to The Golden Fang. N’Jadaka reveled in every piece of this club, each piece built by his own hands and paid for by his own coin.

Inhaling deeply, N’Jadaka prayed he could take in enough of that sweet bloody scent to tide him over until tomorrow night. Given how high the moon stood in the sky, it was probably past curfew. He pushed the last human out of the door, holding her neck and groaning. Business was booming at the club, but he still had to follow the laws.

No blood clubs open after 10PM. N’Jadaka checked the clock, clucking his tongue when he saw it read 11:03PM. Well, rules have always sounded like more of a suggestion to N’Jadaka anyways. Still should have sent her through the back door. Terra, N’Jadaka’s sleek golden jaguar padded up to him, licking around her mouth with a satisfied purr.

“Sounds like you found a few mice out back, T.” The cat’s golden eyes slid to N’Jadaka’s brown ones lazily.

“Fat ones?” Terra bared her teeth in a wicked feline grin and N’Jadaka smiled.

“Alright, alright. You’re the baddest cat around.”

N’Jadaka rolled his eyes thinking of the antiquated laws his kind had to follow to appease what remained of the human race. It’s not like the stupid laws made a difference anyways. Humans and vampires will do what they what. They always have. Sometimes that means a human loses a few pints of blood, or a vampire loses their head. That’s just nature.

N’Jadaka made his way out back for a quick smoke. He still had to clear out and clean up before the Keepers make their rounds. Bast forbid he doesn’t have their payment ready for them. He needs those nosy neighborhood guards to stay out of his business, and keeping them paid up is the easiest way to get some peace and fucking quiet in this town. He was interrupted the second his cigarette caught a spark.

“Uh hi. Is this your baby?” N’Jadaka should have known he wouldn’t get what he asked for. He never does.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” He said this after a long pull from his cigarette, only turning after he was ready to exhale.

After the cloud of smoke dissipated, it revealed a coughing girl and a sleeping baby. Studying the girl and the black leather bundle she held close to her chest he wondered what fucking parallel universe he just walked into. Everyone in this town knows N’Jadaka hates children. Maybe not hate but he sure doesn’t like them.

It was only when he breathed in that he discovered her true nature. A human. In this town, if a human was out after dark that meant the only things they were looking for were danger or death. Still when N’Jadaka gazed at the girl before him, he didn’t see a trace of that reckless listlessness most humans held in their eyes after dark.

“This baby, uh…Is she yours?” The girl stumbled over her words as she took in the tall stranger. Hazel knew anyone who hung out in the back alley of The Golden Fang was bad news, but she couldn’t stop herself from staring. The man wore black leather pants, and chains glittered on his textured chest. Dreads tickled his brows and he looked strong enough to snap her neck with a flick of his wrist.

“Nah.” Erik stubbed out his cigarette and circled the human.

“Oh, uh…”

“But I am curious to know what a human like you is doing out after dark.” Before Hazel could answer, a crash sounded from inside the club. The man let out a curse she couldn’t understand, and Hazel jumped, jostling the baby.

N’Jadaka checked his watch. 11:10PM, Shuri is right on time for the scent cleaning, its just a shame he found two humans out back. There’s no way to explain this one. N’Jadaka hoped Shuri brought all of her tools. If he was going to hide the scent of two humans, he’d need the powerful shit.

“Cousin, where did you find a human and a…” The younger girl leaned forward, giving the bundle in Hazel’s arms a sniff. “wolf pup? Seriously?”  

“I didn’t go looking for them. They just showed up here.” There’s no way in hell N’Jadaka would seek out humans. With the laws now, keeping a human is more trouble than the fresh blood is worth.

“Well where’s her registration number?” The slender girl lifted Hazel’s arm and dropped it, peered at her neck like she expected something to be there. “No chip either...”

“I already told you Shuri. I don’t know.”

“N’Jadaka, brother will not be happy about this.”

“Well it’s a good thing he doesn’t own this club” N’Jadaka bared his teeth at the girl and Hazel wondered at the flash of gold in his mouth. She grew even more intrigued as the girl, Shuri, replied in earnest; Silver fangs glinting under the fluorescent light. She watched the pair, wrapped in leather that glittered with zippers, buttons, and fasteners wondering what exactly she had walked into.

“If anyone finds it about this— you harboring humans, it’ll ruin his campaign. He’ll be furious.”

“I ain’t worried about your brother Shuri. Just help me scrub their scent before the Keeper’s come.” A knock pounded at the door and Hazel clutched the baby closer to her.

“Too late.” Shuri was already on the move.

“Hide them and then get the door. I’ll take care of the rest.” The man, N’Jadaka pushed Hazel and the baby backwards, into a ruby red room and under a large circular mattress.

“Don’t make a sound.” Hazel wanted to protest, just to inform him that babies don’t really care about keep quiet, but he was gone in a flash. Literally, she blinked, and the man was gone. Strange.

Back in the front room of the Golden Fang, N’Jadaka opened to door to two Keepers. Both men, both severely out of shape, and both werwolves. He could smell the fur on their backs, the scent of wet dog emanating through the room. He cringed, scrunching his nose in the process.

“Gentlemen.” The Keeper’s barely nodded his way, instead following the scent trail the human and wolf pup left. Shuri, what the hell are you doing?

“It smells like a human in here.” N’Jadaka waved this off, doing his best to look around for Shuri discreetly. She said she would handle this crap, but the PO’s were still sniffing the air like rabid dogs.

“We get all kinds of creatures in this club. You know the law.” The Creature’s Rights act was passed a few decades ago, ensuring that no business could deny services to any creature, human or otherwise. It was the one law N’Jadaka didn’t mind following, if only because it made him more money.

The Keeper’s had already made it to the door where Hazel and the baby hid, pushing it open so hard it slammed against the wall and jumped back towards its assailants. N’Jadaka was this close to ripping their heads off, Keeper’s had no sense of propriety or respect for his things, when a strange odor filled the room. It was soft, so gentle N’Jadaka barely noticed it. The Keeper’s didn’t seem to notice it either, though it did throw them off track. Shaking their heads, they exited the room where Hazel hid, sniffing the hallway instead.

The Keeper’s finished their sweep in 10 minutes, holding their hands out for their payoff. They knew N’Jadaka never closed on time, hell everybody knew it. That’s why most creatures came to his bar. Still the Keeper’s loved to dangle their minimal power over his head, and he could stand to lose a few hundred bucks to keep making thousands every night. The Keeper’s went on their merry way, and N’Jadaka sighed in relief. Whatever Shuri had concocted, N’Jadaka wanted ten.

“You can come out now.” N’Jadaka called out. Hazel jumped at the sound of his voice, jostling the sleeping baby. The little one thankfully stayed asleep as Hazel made her way out to the front of the bar.

“Now, how the hell did a human like you get here?”

“I was walking home from work and I heard—Wait a second, why do you keep calling me a human?”

“Because that’s what you are…” N’Jadaka wondered if this human was just stupid. That would explain how she ended up out alone after curfew.

“Well what are you?” Hazel cocked an eyebrow and hip at his patronizing tone, and stood her ground. N’Jadaka on the other hand, grinned. His fangs dropped, gleaming gold from top to bottom.

“Me? Well I’m your worst nightmare.”

—l—

Earth Stream 328: September 30, 2040

7:19PM

Calawuga is a mountain town. It rests at the base of the Calawat mountain range. Shops and bars and little wooden houses dot the desert landscape making a home where dust and decay thrive. There were rumors of wild animals and lingering spirits roaming the rocky mountainside but that wasn’t what the people of Calawuga had to fear.

The people of Calawuga only had to fear the magic they couldn’t control. It sparked in the air and lingered in the water, changing its residents in more ways than one from the moment the first settlers made it to the plains. There were more beings in the tiny town than anywhere in the country. The government had even tried to set up shop at the base of the mountain, but the gangs drove them out.

Well the government called them gangs but to the residents of Calawuga, they were the four founding tribes. The Golden Jaguars, Great Gorillas and Black Panthers were the strongest in number, the magic crackling through the town having changed over half of them into shapeshifters. The Vibranium Babes were witch doctors of a sort, mining the land for its magic and exporting it for a penny prettier than any of the townspeople could have hoped.

A town like this drew all kinds of drifters, from witches to fairies and even a banshee or two. The rogue magical creatures in this town never usually affiliated with the tribes, preferring to keep to themselves, but one or two might integrate to make a living. Which explained why Harley, a young powerful witch, found herself in a Golden Jaguar cut within the first week of her arrival in the dusty desert town of Calawuga.

Harley, originally Hazel Vasquez, hadn’t come to Calawuga to join any tribe. She only came to get away from the city where everyone saw her as a freak of magical nature. The magic coursing through was more than anyone in the city could even begin to comprehend. When she heard of Calawuga she worked her way across the Southwest. It was easy enough to leave home, here siblings were well taken care of, they were normal. She never had many or any friends, word of her powers was enough to terrify anyone within a 2 foot radius and keep Hazel isolated.

It took 3 long months before Hazel rolled into the town of Calawuga on the heels of a burning hot summer. She had arrived in one of the Vibranium Babes’ shops looking for a crystal to calm and clarify. The shop was a sort of apothecary turned laboratory owned by a wraith of a woman named Shuri.

With no previous tribe affiliation, she probably would have been snatched up by Shuri and the VB’s if she hadn’t been so distracted by the baby that crawled into the shop on all fours.

The baby girl wore a tiny leather jacket with a sparkling gold jaguar embroidered on the back. Her head bobbed as she lifted it, dark curls bouncing as she gave a gummy smile. Hazel couldn’t resist sweeping the girl up and pulling her close.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Hazel was only half listening to Shuri, most of her attention on a completely one sided conversation with the giggling baby girl in her arms.

“Get your witching hands off my kid.” A stranger burst through the door of Shuri’s shop so violently Hazel almost dropped the kid.

Shuri rolled her eyes as Hazel took in the man. He was tall, taller than her at least. His beard was almost grisly, but his scowl broke when his eyes settled on his daughter.

“Relax cousin. ‘Yana likes her, see?” The baby girl nuzzled into Hazel’s neck snuffling quietly.

“I don’t give a shit Shuri. I don’t need a dirty witch anywhere near my kid.” Killmonger, known to the local tribes as KM or ‘Monger, knew what witches wanted with shapeshifter cubs. Witches in this region were notorious for snatching up the younglings and using them for all kinds of ritual magic.  Now Killmonger had never seen this witch around before, but all of those creatures are the same. Power hungry, reckless monsters.

“Considering the fact that your infant crawled in here alone, I’d say you’re lucky to have anyone watching your kid. You clearly ain’t.” Hazel didn’t need a shifter of all creatures shitting on her for the magic that ran through her veins. She didn’t hold back her sneer while she spoke, nearly baring her teeth at the asshole.

“She’s clearly a better babysitter than you are cousin.” Shuri turned to Hazel. “Are you looking for work? ‘Monger pays well for that little trouble maker.”

Hazel had a hard time believing this cutie could cause any trouble, but she knew kids could be deceiving. The shifter named killmonger sputtered disagreeably, but Hazel ignored him, accepting the job offer. Within a week she become Ayana’s favorite girl and The Golden Jaguar’s favorite baker. With the whole tribe drooling after her pound cake, Killmonger excluded, it didn’t take long for Hazel to be invited to join the Golden Jags. As the leader ‘Monger wasn’t pleased with the vote to invite the witch, but he ain’t a dictator. The tribe votes for what they want, and apparently they want the witch. So three months after leaving home Hazel Vasquez became Harley of the Golden Jaguar Tribe.

It was smooth sailing for a while, Ayana and Harley finding an easy routine. The pair had just returned to the Golden Fang, a favorite spot of the Golden Jaguars because it was owned by a few tribesmen themselves. Harley admired Killmonger’s sparkling golden bike with a sigh, coveting the black and gold beauty. When Harley arrived in the town of Calawuga, she had never even had an errant thought of the motorcycles that kicked up dust and roared like wild animals. Nw, she was saving all she could to get her own.

Ayana and Harley had had a busy day, going to the park and then the local library for story time. Harley had hoped Ayana would be tired, she sure as hell was. The sun had already dipped below the mountains, casting everything in a pink haze, but the little shapeshifting cub only giggled for more action as they entered the creaking wooden floors of the bar.

Most of the tribe was present filling the booths and milling around the bar, Killmonger included. after finding a space near the ancient jukebox, Harley tossed Ayana up in the air. They had played this game plenty of times before, it being Ayana’s favorite after all, always leaving her shrieking with giggles. Things were different today though. Harley tossed Ayana into the air, smiling as she shrieked with laughter, arms out to catch her. Just as she was about to come down, Ayana vanished with a pop.

“Ayana?” Harley called out cautiously. The bar had gone silent, but Harley kept looking. Magical children had a way of manifesting and manipulating the electrical energy in the air. Get one kid a little too excited and he turns blue, another might turn into a toad. This could just be something like that. Harley prayed it was something like that. Seconds passed with no answer and a sick lump settled in Harley’s stomach.

“Where the fuck is my daughter Harley?” Killmonger looked just as furious as he had the day she met him but she didn’t flinch, too busy trying to work out what the fuck had just happened.

“How the fuck should I know ‘Monger?” Harley’s voice was frantic. Even as a witch, nothing like this had ever happened. She’s never seen a kid vanish in thin air.

“You were holding her ass! Everybody saw it!”

“Yeah and everybody saw her dis-a-fucking-pear too!” Harley waved her arms wildly, sweeping across the room. The Golden Jags were silent and stoic and for the first time since she started rolling with the Jags, Harley felt unwelcome

Killmonger couldn’t believe this shit. He barely even hired the witch and now his kid is just gone. For a moment he had actually thought they might be able to get along. The girl is quick as a whip and her pound cake is to die for. Now Killmonger wanted to kick himself for even imagining that he could trust Ayana with anyone but him.

“I don’t know what you did witch, but you better get my daughter back or that cut you’re wearing is going to be on a corpse.”

Harley barely registered the threat, mind going a mile a minute drawing up all kinds of answers to explain Ayana’s disappearance.

—l—

Earth Stream 245: October 1, 2040

4:15PM

Erik Stevens is the best at what he does. He knows that. The cops know that. Hell, that bumfuck of a president even knows that. None of that knowledge has helped Erik live in anything other than a shitty apartment, paying shitty rent, in the shitty town of Ortega. And the coffee sucks too. Well that might be dramatic. Ortega is a nice town, and the coffee might be more of Erik’s fault than anyone else’s, but every nice place has its dark side. It’s a good thing he loves what he does.

Jules Fay spent twenty minutes loitering in her car outside of the office building. She spent another five gazing at the directory searching for the man she prayed would fix her problems. Another two minutes were wasted with her hand poised in front of the door, ready to knock. Before she did, she read over the name on the glass one more time. Erik Stevens, Private Investigator.

Erik welcomed his 4:00 appointment in at 4:16, noting her clenched fists and gnawed lip. He gestured for her to sit, taking a seat of his own behind his desk. He didn’t even get a chance to offer her water before she spoke hurriedly.

“Detective Stevens, sir—”

“Please m’am, I’m not a part of the police force, just call me Erik.” The woman nodded reluctantly, but didn’t quite manage to change his moniker completely. Erik didn’t bother to offer the woman his shitty coffee, he didn’t want to make her day worse.

“Mr. Stevens sir, my daughter is missing.”

“How long has she been gone?” Erik’s pen was poised for her answer, already in work mode. He’d solved plenty of missing persons cases. Not all of them ended in happy reunions, but at least the families didn’t have to worry any longer than necessary.

“A few hours.”

“M’am—”

“Call me Jules, please.” Erik nodded and checked his tone. The woman was clearly frantic, but if it’s only been a few hours…It could be anything.

“Jules, if it’s only been a couple of hours, how can you be sure she’s missing?”

“She didn’t text me last night after work. She always tells me when she gets home after work. She never did. She didn’t show up for work today and she’s not answering any of my texts or calls.” The words tripped over themselves on their way out of her mouth, and her fingers tapped an unrelenting rhythm on the arm of the chair.

“Did you two have an argument?”

“No! That’s what I’m trying to tell you. There is no reason for her not to respond to me.”

“And you haven’t gone to the police beca—”

“It hasn’t been long enough for them to start an investigation. Besides, the cops aren’t going to do shit, and I heard…Well I heard you are the best at finding our missing girls.” It was true, Erik had singlehandedly brought home 12 kidnapped girls for his community and a few more with the “help” of the police. At this point, it is what he is known for. Finding the children the cops so conveniently “forgot”. He still hesitated to take the case. What if this is the one I can’t solve?

“Mr. Stevens, please. She’s all I have. If she ran away that’s fine, you don’t have to bring her back, I just need to know she’s okay.” The words tumbled out of her mouth, the same as before.

‘One day there’s going to be a case you can’t solve Stevens.’ Erik pushed away the voice of his old captain and shoved his worries aside. This woman needed help, and that’s why he got into the business anyways. To help. He swallowed a gulp of his lukewarm coffee with a grimace.

“I’ll find her.”

A/N: So…uh…..yeah…..there’s gonna be like…3 Erik’s in this. (yikes) This is a complete departure from anything I’ve ever done so…this is purely experimental. I think one day I’d like to turn it into a TV show but who knows?  It’s definitely the biggest idea I’ve had for a fic. It will be four parts and I’ll release a new part every Friday so stay tuned for more next week!

This all started cause I read The Bookstore by @wawakanda-btch and wanted to write a Vampire!Erik fic...remember this post? Yeah, that was for this fic. I’ve been cooking this up for months lol. I’m just going to say that this is what happens when you watch Orphan Black and Vampire Diaries and True Blood and Sons of Anarchy and Rick & Morty in one lifetime...inspiration lol

Let me know what y’all think! You know I love your comments! Thanks for reading!

The Mystery of the Golden Fang Mood Board

A Map Made in Heaven

Masterlist

Taglist: @princessstevens @muse-of-mbaku @k-michaelis @queenamaniii @thatrandomfangirl98 @dreadedphilosphy @killmongurl @thelovelyliterary @elaindeereads @thedom223 @bidibidibombaclaat@thatrandomfangirl98 @panthergoddessbast @nemesispawn @writingmarvellousimagines @someareblindtoitsbeauty @jozigrrl @iamrheaspeaks @thadelightfulone 

[myhauntedsalem]

The Old Jail  Florida

The Old Jail is one of the most exciting places if you are a ghost hunter at heart. This structure was constructed by the ever-popular Henry Flagler, and opened in the year of 1891. It was carefully built to resemble that of one of the fine hotels that are located along the Atlantic Coast in Florida. For approximately sixty years, prisoners, both male and female, were held here. Today, the Old Jail is open to the public. Transformed into a museum, guests to this structure can observe where prisoners were kept, the spooky gallows where many prisoners were put to death, and more! If you want to visit one of the most haunted places in St. Augustine, the Old Jail is a wonderful choice among many!

One of the first things that visitors should know when they visit the old jail is that several prisoners lost their lives at this location. The most common culprit behind the death of the prisoners was the ever-popular noose in which several were hung. Charles Joseph Perry served as the Sheriff from the time the jail was opened in 1891 until the year 1919. This individual took his job very seriously. He was a firm believer in the fact that if people were sent to his prison, they would serve their time in a punitive manner. There were not too many inmates that dared to differ with his way of thinking either. He was a startling large man, measuring in at six and a half feet, and weighed approximately three hundred pounds! In order to make extra certain that no one escaped a large amount of dogs was kept behind the Old Jail.

The conditions at the structure were relatively harsh. One of the first issues was that the only water source in the jail was for drinking. This meant that individuals housed here were not allowed baths. Weather conditions on the external area of the structure were often much the same on the inside. If it was hot, it was even hotter indoors. The same occurred in the winter months, in which it was exceptionally hot. Most beds were composed of the Spanish moss that grows rather rapidly in the Florida area. This moss was used to fill mattresses, but red bugs and other pests that are native to the moss often infested the beds. To receive a blanket was practically unheard of in the days of the prison, and to receive a pillow for the beds was completely unheard of. Sickness and death were extremely common in the Old Jail, especially the disease of dysentery.

There are two places that you will find the Old Jail listed. This includes the National Directory of Haunted Places, and the National Registry of Historic Places. The following indicates some of the spectacular hauntings that seem to occur at this haunted place in St. Augustine:

1. There is a sweet smell that seems to consistently hang in the air of this haunted prison. It reflects that of molasses. Regardless of the cleaning efforts, this is a smell that seems to be related to the hauntings that occur in this structure.

2. Many individuals that reside in the neighborhood of the jail, visit the museum, and even work in the structure have heard the barking of dogs on a regular basis. It is believed that these are the spiritual hounds of Sheriff Perry.

3. Certain tunes have been heard in the Old Jail – almost as if someone is slightly humming them. One of these songs distinctly reflects that of Swing Low Sweet Chariot.

4. In many areas of the Old Jail, you can hear footsteps with a sound of distinct chains moving in motion with the steps. It is believed that these are the souls of the spirits that are still held captive, even after death.

5. Many individuals have heard the sounds of shouts and wails only to discover that there was no physical person present to have made the sounds.

[auckie]

I need to report my current town house on every bed bug registry I can find bc it did actually have bed bugs. Twice. And when I leave I think I’ll do the whole drain jello trick and maybe start trying to make mild mold and water damage 😶

[fidomate]

How to do a Proper Dog Care?

A dog can be a magnificent expansion to any home, yet whether you're an accomplished pet parent or a first-time adopter, it's critical to keep your dog friend's wellbeing and joy a top need. The following are some valuable tips for all dog guardians.

 Also, recall: If you're thinking about bringing home another dog, it would be ideal if you make reception your first alternative. Dog care is very important to keep the dog healthy and fit. We urge you to peruse our registry of adoptable dog in your general vicinity or visit our Find a Shelter page to begin your hunt.

 Bolstering

• Puppies eight to 12 weeks old need four dinners per day.

• Feed little dogs three to a half year old three suppers per day.

• Feed little dogs a half year to one year two suppers per day.

• When your dog arrives at his first birthday celebration, one dinner daily is typically enough.

• For a few doges, including bigger dogs or those inclined to swell, it's smarter to sustain two little  dinners.

 Premium-quality dry nourishment gives a well-adjusted eating regimen to grown-up hounds and might be blended in with water, juices or canned nourishment. These dog care products can help your dog growth and nourishment. Your dog may appreciate curds, cooked egg or products of the soil, however these increments ought not add up to in excess of 10% of his every day nourishment admission.

 Little dogs ought to be bolstered a great, brand-name pup nourishment (huge breed doggie food sources for enormous breeds). If it's not too much trouble limit "individuals nourishment," be that as it may, in light of the fact that it can bring about nutrient and mineral awkward nature, bone and teeth issues and may cause meticulous dietary patterns and stoutness. Perfect, crisp water ought to be accessible consistently, and make certain to wash nourishment and water dishes regularly.

 Exercise

Dogs need exercise to consume calories, animate their psyches, and remain solid. Singular exercise needs change dependent on breed or breed blend, sex, age and level of wellbeing. Regular exercise and proper Dog Care Medicine Online always helps in keeping your dog healthy. Exercise likewise will in general assist hounds with maintaining a strategic distance from weariness, which can prompt damaging practices. Administered silly buffoonery will fulfill a significant number of your pet's instinctual desires to burrow, group, bite, recover and pursue.

 Preparing

Help keep your dog clean and diminish shedding with visit brushing. Check for insects and ticks every day during a warm climate. Most dogs shouldn't be washed time and again a year. Prior to washing, brush or cut out all mats from the coat. Cautiously wash all cleanser out of the coat, or the soil will adhere to cleanser buildup. Kindly visit our Dog Grooming Tips page for more data.

Taking care of

To convey a doggie or little dog, place one hand under the dog's chest, with either your lower arm or other hand supporting the rear legs and back end. Never endeavor to lift or get your doggie or little dog by the forelegs, tail or back of the neck. On the off chance that you do need to lift an enormous dog, lift from the underside, supporting his chest with one arm and his backside with the other. This are some of the way dog care can be done.

Lodging

Your pet needs a warm, calm spot to rest, away from all drafts and off the floor. A preparation case or dog bed is perfect, with a spotless cover or cushion set inside. Wash the dog's sheet material regularly. On the off chance that your dog will invest a great deal of energy outside, be certain she approaches shade and a lot of cool water in sweltering climate, and a warm, dry, secured cover when it's virus.

Permitting and Identification

Pursue your locale's permitting guidelines. Make certain to connect the permit to your dog's neckline. This, alongside an ID tag and embedded microchip or tattoo, can help secure your dog's arrival should she become lost.

Insects and Ticks

Day by day examinations of your dog for bugs and ticks during the warm seasons are significant. Utilize a bug brush to discover and expel insects. There are a few new strategies for bug and tick control. Address your veterinarian about these and different choices. Visit our Fleas and Ticks page for more data.

Medications and Poisons

Never give your dog medicine that has not been recommended by a veterinarian. On the off chance that you presume that your creature has ingested a harmful substance.

Fixing and Neutering

Female dog ought to be fixed and male dogs fixed by a half year of age. If it's not too much trouble visit our Spay/Neuter Your Pet page to find out additional.

 Inoculations

Your dog may profit by accepting various inoculations. If it's not too much trouble visit our Pet Vaccinations page to find out additional.

Dog Supply Checklist

 • Premium-quality dog nourishment and treats

 • Food dish

 • Water bowl

 • Toys, toys and more toys, including safe bite toys

 • Brush and search for preparing, including insect brush

 • Collar with permit and ID tag

 • Leash

 • Carrier (for littler doges)

 • Training case

 • Dog bed or box with warm cover or towel

 • Dog toothbrush

The Scoop on Poop

Keep your dog on a chain when you are outside, except if you are in a verified, fenced-in territory. In the event that your dog craps on a neighbor's grass, the walkway or some other open spot, it would be ideal if you tidy it up.

[the-once-and-future-dork]

Anti bed bug lotion

Bed bugs are a nasty pest that are becoming increasingly more common in urban centers. It seems almost impossible to find an apartment in the city that hasn’t been on the bed bug registry in the last two years. While your landlord will more than likely pay for the costs of treatment, should bed bugs be discovered, treatment doesn’t always happen right away, and it doesn’t always work.

COMMON SIGNS OF BED BUGS

 - series of mysterious, mosquito-like bites that march in lines along the body, particularly on the limbs

 - dirty buildup in the crevices of the mattress (yes, bed bug poop)

 - tiny bloodstains on bed sheets 

While bed bugs don’t carry diseases that we know of, many people can have an allergic reaction to the bites (also, its just annoying and itchy). This lotion has worked wonders for me, and you can make it yourself easily at home.

INGREDIENTS

 - pure peppermint essential oil

 - coconut oil

That’s it, just those two things. Bed bugs not only despise the scent of strong oils like peppermint, but peppermint has been known to actually kill bed bugs. Not a home treatment I’d try to get rid of my infestation, but it has certainly kept the bed bugs at bay. Simply combine 200 drops of peppermint oil to 1 cup of coconut oil in a saucepan over a medium heat. Store in an air tight container as a liquid oil, or optionally refrigerate to return it to a solid state. Apply the oil all over (and I mean everywhere on your body. If you can wash it with soap, you can put oil on it) before you go to bed, and the bugs will be avoiding you like the plague. 

Always TEST your reaction to the pure essential oil before you use it. If you’re allergic to mint, other oils like lavender will work as a substitute. I’ve never tried another carrier oil other than coconut, but if you try it, I’d be interested to know the results.

This oil is handy to have if you’re traveling as well, as hotels are often hot beds for bed bug infestation. 

Some quick facts about bed bugs:

 - They are often difficult to see, and are even harder to get rid of. There is a good chance that they will re infest after treatment.

 - THEY DON’T TRAVEL IN THE CLOTHES ON YOUR BODY. Bed bugs will die at sustained temperatures of 40C (the human body is usually around 38C) and don’t fancy such toasty travel lodgings. They prefer luggage, unworn fabrics and even fabric shoes. 

 - Bed bugs don’t always infest the bed. They can live in any upholstered furniture, storage bins, rugs, curtains, closets ect

 - Bed bugs can live up to a year without blood, and experts say that you should wait a year and a half before reintroducing objects from a previously infested home 

 - You may not be the carrier of the pests. If you live in an apartment building, bed bugs can travel from unit to unit with ease if proper sealing is not provided

 - Your pets are probably the safest in your home. Their fur is often too thick for the pests to bite through, and their body temps are often too warm for them to carry bed bugs.

Good luck, and don’t let the bed bugs bite. 

[veravertorp]

remus lupin | twenty | pureblood | order of the phoneix

wand: utp. boggart: utp. patronus: utp. pet: utp. job: utp. faceclaim: (suggestions: julian morris, pedro perdomo, jonathan keltz, luke newberry.)

                                                      history

Remus John Lupin was born on the 10th of March to a wizard named Lyall Lupin and his muggle wife named Hope (nee Howell), and his parents were ecstatic. Remus was a sweet, imaginative toddler, eager to learn to read and write, and he loved learning to bake with his mother. It was often the toddler was found carrying around a book that he was trying to read, or wanted his parents to read to him, and things seemed wonderful. However, as Remus approached his fifth birthday, things changed forever, and not in the way that either he or his parents wanted them to change.

Remus’s father Lyall worked at the Ministry of Magic in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. When a werewolf pack was brought in after the deaths of two muggle children, Fenrir Grayback was among them, pretending that he was only a muggle tramp and not one of the wolves. Because of the registry not being well-maintained, the Ministry was unaware that Grayback really was a werewolf; and although Lyall recognized characteristic signs of lycanthropy in Grayback’s appearance and behavior and voiced his concerns, he was only ridiculed for it and that’s when Lyall lost his temper.

Declaring werewolves to be “soulless, evil, deserving nothing but death”, Lyall was expelled from the room, Grayback was released, and the damage had been done. Grayback escaped, since the intention to erase his memories didn’t work, and the werewolf came up with a plan to get revenge on Lyall - by attacking his only son. Remus was asleep in his bed when the window was forced open and Grayback attacked him. Although Lyall came rushing in and was able to repel Grayback with powerful curses to save his sons life, it wasn’t enough to stop the man’s evil goal of causing Remus to become a werewolf.

Remus was taken to various healers and his parents tried all kinds of treatments to cure their son, but nothing in those days was actually effective, and there were no cures. Instead, they tried their best to keep control of Remus and hide his condition. Remus wasn’t allowed to play with other children, and whenever their neighbors became suspicious, they would move, again and again. He knew that his parents loved him so much, and he was grateful to always have their love and support, but not having other children to play with or interact with, Remus was very lonely.

As he grew, Remus became harder for his parents to keep hidden or control during a full moon. He tried his best to behave, but the werewolf side of him wasn’t something he could control himself. At ten, he was already knocking down doors and breaking windows, causing his father to use ever more powerful spells. The boy spent his years growing up lonely and upset; he’d heard his father talk about Hogwarts, but he and his parents were sure at that point that he’d never be able to go. While his mother taught him muggle things, his father tried to provide a magical education at home as well, just so that Remus would be able to learn.

Before Remus’ eleventh birthday, however, Albus Dumbledore showed up to tell the Lupin family that he knew that Fenrir had attacked Remus, and to assure them that Remus would be able to attend Hogwarts, since he’d already seen to it that Remus would have a safe, secure location to spend his monthly transformations. Remus could hardly believe it, and the boy was nearly ecstatic. He would be able to go to Hogwarts, he would be able to be around other children and to learn! Of course he’d have to be careful and keep his secret, but he would go to Hogwarts!

Hogwarts was everything he’d ever dreamed of and more. Sorted into Gryffindor House, Remus was quickly brought into a group of friends; James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew. Although at first he had to hide his secret from them, making up stories to explain his monthly disappearances such as his mother being ill and him needing to visit her, the group eventually figured out the truth. He’d been terrified at first, sure that they would leave him, but he found that their friendship would never waver. The love he felt for his friends, especially as they decided to become Animagi in order to keep him company, could never be compared to anything. He also became fast friends with Lily Evans, adoring the girl and bonding with her over their school work, and adoring how kind and wonderful she was, no matter what.

The Shrieking Shack became his home once a month, disappearing under the Whomping Willow down a tunnel. When his friends joined him, their animal companionship helped tame the wolf in Remus, his mind more his own during transformations, so that he was able to run around and play with the others. When they gave him the nickname Moony, he was beyond happy, having never thought he would get to do any of this with friends. One of the things he was most proud of, among all their pranking and fun, was their creation of the Marauder’s Map, especially with all the work they put into it.

When graduation began approaching, Remus couldn’t help but be a little worried about what would come next. Not only was there danger growing in the world, but how would he survive? His condition was something that he was still having to hide, and it only made him more nervous. He spent months worrying and stressing about what he would do, and how he would live. He couldn’t just go home, he told himself. He had to go out on his own, no matter what it took.

Still, he’s making it. Although between jobs at the moment, Remus has been managing to live on his own, too afraid to go back to his parents because he doesn’t want to interrupt their peaceful life and not wanting to seem like a burden to them anymore. As a member of the Order, he’s determined to do what it takes to help keep those he loves safe, no matter what it may cost him, and he’s always worrying and wanting to make sure that his friends are okay. He’s been doing tasks for the Order, helping out wherever he can.

                                                  personality

Remus has a mothering personality; always there to check on and take care of his friends. Peaceful, reserved, compassionate, selfless, brave, good-natured, levelheaded, intelligent, and kind. Remus sees the good in everyone, and is extremely forgiving. Mature for his age, Remus tries to always keep the peace, or be a diplomat when things are going wrong. He’s very perceptive and intuitive, trying to know what his friends need before they ask. Also, despite feeling afraid of rejection and hatred, he’s very courageous as a Gryffindor is; though he doesn’t always step up and speak up when he probably should.

                                                 relationships

james potter, sirius black & peter pettigrew // these three boys really helped bring remus out of his little bubble. they accepted him and loved him as he was and in return he would do absolutely anything for them. he feels he owes them something, his life - maybe. they are a part of his family, and he’d follow them into hell if they so wished. he wouldn’t know what to do without them. they really helped bring him out of his shell and show him that there are people out there who would accept him - all of him. lily evans // remus and lily had hit it off the first time they were grouped for a project. they were both incredibly smart, and so very caring. remus couldn’t help but talk to her about his struggles and problems - and her with him. they found buddies in one another, their person. she was the one other person he told about his lycanthropy, and again, she accepted him - all of him. he appreciates all she does for him. she’s so good with him, and knows how to calm him down. he gets why james is so obsessed with her. severus snape // he’s pretty sure that the slytherin boy knows something or at least, suspects something. remus is constantly paranoid that severus has found out about his lycanthropy and is going to go blab it to everyone because james keeps picking on him. he’s afraid of blackmail or any sort of retaliation. snape keeps looking at him funny. riya patil // she won’t leave him alone. she’s constantly getting under his skin, trying to get to know him. remus knows she wouldn’t accept who he really is, so what is even the point in letting her in? if she ever found out about his secret she’d shun him. she needs to just go away, and stop bugging him all the damn time.

REMUS LUPIN is unfortunately TAKEN!

[wecocogg-blog]

If you're planning on driving in the States, here are a few things you're going to want to keep in mind

Author: Sam Casteris

​The time has come. You're finally taking that Great American Road Trip you've been waiting to take for years. That's great! But as a foreign national, taking a road trip in the States isn't as easy as hopping in your rental car and going on your merry way. 

Make sure you know how to drive in the USA

This one is pretty basic, but can cause a surprising amount of difficulty for people who haven't done their research.

Ask yourself if you're comfortable driving an automatic car. We have stick shift cars in the states, but they're not as readily available. If you feel more comfortable driving shift, make sure you make a special request for one with your rental car company. 

Remember that we drive on the right side of the road. This is another one that sounds easy, but can cause some issues if you're used to driving on the left-hand side of the road. 

Familiarize yourself with our traffic laws and driving rules. Rules of the road aren't universal. If you're from a country with particularly lax (or strict!) traffic laws, make sure you thoroughly do your research. This isn't a place where you're going to want to encounter any surprises.

Choose your rental car company carefully

​Rental car companies all have different rules and guidelines that they abide by. When renting a car, make sure they rent to non-citizens. Some rental car companies have special rules about crossing city, county, state, or even country lines, so ensure that your road trip falls under their rules. A handful of rental car companies allow it, but charge a significant fee to return your rental car in another city or state. Other companies may need additional types of insurance or may charge an additional fee. Every company will be different, so do your homework on this one to avoid incurring surcharges.

Get your paperwork in order

People driving in the States must have a valid driver's license. Some states will require an International Driving Permit (IDP), in addition to a valid license from your own country. Depending on where you rent your car from, your rental company may also require one, even if the state you're in (or are going to) doesn't require one. Make sure to double check with your rental car company, and to call the Department of Motor Vehicles in each state you're visiting. 

Get your IDP before coming to the States. You can only get one in your home country.

Beware of IDP scams. Make sure to go straight to your home country's Department of Motor Vehicles.

​

​Insurance

​Insurance is a requirement to drive in the United States. Your rental car company can help you with this one, but you'll also want to make sure you're not duplicating coverage. Check with your credit card, any motor club affiliations you may have, or your insurance back at home. Some  plans offer travel coverage! Don't double pay if you don't have to.

Be prepared for any bumps along the way

Accidents happen, literally! Whether this means getting pulled over, getting a ticket, a fender bender, or worse, you're going to want to make sure you're totally prepared. Always have your passport, IDP, home driver's license, vehicle registration, rental car papers, and any insurance documents handy. If you get into an accident, not leaving your information with the other person is considered a crime. As a foreign national, this can be a huge infraction... and it's not something you want to take a risk on. Here's the information that you're required by law to exchange with the person or peoples you get into an accident with, should that happen:

Name, telephone number, and license ID number

License plate number, model, and year of the car

Registration number and expiration date

Name of the insurance company and policy number

Make sure you get the right phone plan

On a road trip, the last thing you'll want to rely on is free WiFi. Anything can happen on the road, from GPS snafus to more dangerous situations. You will want reliable access to a Maps app or GPS, as well as a phone to call people in case of an emergency. If it's too expensive to get an international plan with your home provider, get a pay-per-use phone in the United States. You won't regret this one.

Be aware of local biases

Not every city, town, or even state has the same culture in the States. What you experience in the Midwest will be different from what you experience in the Deep South. Even more granularly, what you experience in say, Canarsie or East New York will be different from what you experience in Williamsburg (and all three locations are in Brooklyn, NY).  Be conscious of your surroundings at all times, even if areas that seem friendly or safe on the surface. Make sure you're aware of the crime rate, and the types of crimes committed. Don't be afraid to refer to forums, either.

When looking for a place to stay, check the Bed Bug Registry first

Bed bugs are one American souvenir you're not going to want to bring home. ​

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AUTHOR BIO

Sam Casteris is an avid travel, lifestyle, and millennial finance writer interested in helping her audiences learn more about topics they're interested in. She currently lives in Phoenix and you can find more of her writing at Casteris Content.