#biding his time

[athelind]

Why did the President wait so long to bow out of the race?

Because he was just Biden his time.

(I realized this morning that this joke has been lurking in the back of my mind since at least 2008, just waiting for an opportunity to strike.)

[seltzher-bottel]

evil bnuuy

[hinamie]

redraws featuring some of my fav megu moments(tm)

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Never gonna live that down.

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[zoobus]

Okay I know this is old news and no one cares anymore but another reason it's dumb to put Toshiro not explicitly telling Laios he didn't like him on his culture/upbringing/east vs west/poorly defined anthropology concepts

(in addition to all the other reasons e.g. Laios canonically has a 1 in people skills, Falin is of the same culture and does not struggle in the same way Laios does, Laios' inability to pick up "high context" social cues/read people is an issue that follows him throughout life not just with this one foreigner, everyone else in his party figures out how Toshiro feels despite not being easterners, Toshiro's recollection of how he indicated he wasn't interested are all common ways to softly reject people in "Western" culture ["I'm busy that day. I'm busy the next day. I'm busy every single day."], Toshiro's nanny [also an easterner] points out his inability to speak his true feelings as both odd and a character flaw he should work on, Toshiro has logical reasons to not make his feelings known, one of the big background themes of the story is that broad, sweeping assumptions about how Other Races think is a good way to misunderstand the individual you're dealing with and the lived experiences that shaped them)

IN ADDITION TO ALL THAT. What was it Rin said before that fight?

[see-arcane]

Thinking about how Dracula starts acting as soon as he reaches the shore. He just spent his entire cruise from Europe to England carelessly terrorizing and devouring a shipful of men for food and fun. Now he gets to Whitby and beckons a convenient sleepwalking young maiden to be his Uber Eats blood delivery--and oh hey! She's hot too? Well, she'll make a fine first conquest on new soil.

Mina shoos him off--for all that I enjoy the 'She scared him!' comments, I think the more legitimate possibility is that he saw her and thought 'Oh neat. Another tasty victim locked and loaded for later. Let's see where this goes.'--and he backs away to scheme over his very first round of psychological torture-courtship***. He discovers that Lucy and Mina are staying in the same house and, sigh, fine, he can't get in uninvited. Plus it'd spoil the fun to just force his way in so soon in the game. He'll find an opportunity later.

He flaps away, huffy.

But, being that he is in the land of oblivious English bloodbags, I find it very very hard to believe that just because his current favorite is out of reach for the moment, he just randomly decides to starve himself. This prick binged on an entire boat's crew Just Because, throwing away a fasting period that kept him an old man in Jonathan's company for TWO MONTHS. He is here to spoil himself.

So I have to wonder if someone else woke up with a sore neck this morning. Some sea-salted local beauty or strapping young man who wakes muzzy from a murky nightmare. They only stepped out for some air last night, surely they're not sick? Maybe they spied the missing hound who fled the Demeter? It really was a massive creature! It had come up to be petted and then...then...

Well, it was late. They were tired. Perhaps they imagined it.

As for the little pinpricks on their throat? Probably just some insect bite or a mishap with a needle.

Nothing to fret over.

[herejusttosufferalong]

You know what i've noticed? Men clock L's feelings for N immediately. My boyfriend said the same: He is attracted to her. He wants her. But they are all - at least the one's i've read, please point it out if i missed someone - unsure about N's feelings towards L. My boyfriend thinks she's a mystery. He's a good sport and has been patiently watching with me a LOT of their videos. He thinks she clearly loves him but he's not sure if she's in love with him, while he is sure that L's feelings are romantic, even with A in the picture. Isn't that weird? He did think she was willing in Italy, Brazil and Ireland, the special they made in Galway, where she cries, we discussed her vulnerability. He said she looked in love with him and thought things had changed but was scared? But he felt in the London Days and premiere interviews & red carpet she was pulling away and he couldn't read her again.

It is very interesting that men have that type of read on N.

Let’s just say for argument sake L and N, especially N, have not been really open and honest regarding how they feel. I wonder if L has had some hesitancy because he too is having trouble reading her.

I will agree N is definitely the one pulling away in the London interviews and at the premiere while L seems to still be leaning in.

[happylittleshrub]

We all know who's really in charge

[hailsatanacab]

"give me a fandom and a prompt and i'll give you at least five sentences"

Ok then.

Jazz, Danny and Bruce are in the same age range, and Bruce has been harboring a massive crush on 7'foot tall Jazz since just after he began his training journey.

His kids know about and are mercyless. Danny thinks he's a bit of a fruit loop and 100% knows Bruce has a crush on his sister.

Into the future his coworkers find out that batman has been quietly pining after the Ghost Kings sister for years.

Chaos.

love that this reads as a challenge. Ok then. Write it. i will, let's goooo!

(sorry i kinda took it so that Jazz, Danny, and Bruce were all old friends but in that horrible adult way where you can only hang out with each other once in a blue moon when your work schedules miraculously align)

——

"Respectfully, Batman, you can take your "it's not necessary" and you can shove it up your arse. There's a demon the size of a skyscraper heading towards Metropolis and we need reinforcements."

"Superman can—"

"Superman can't. You do remember the part of the report I made telling you this, right? Or did your stubborn little bat brain just shut down when I mentioned magic?"

"Actually," Nightwing interrupts from the side, a shit-eating grin on his face, "I think his brain shut down when you mentioned the Ghost King."

"Nightwing." Batman growls in warning, his jaw clenching so hard Constantine can swear he hears the bones creaking.

Nightwing just snickers, and turns away to press a finger to his ear, no doubt letting the rest of the bat brood in on what's happening here... Whatever that is. All Constantine knows is that Batman is standing between him and fixing this mess for no God-forsaken reason.

Luckily, some of the more reasonable members of the League step in to try and talk some sense into Batman. It gives him some time to calm down.

"Batman. We need him. I know you dislike working with unknowns, but he's our best shot."

It actually looks like Wonder Woman might be getting through to him, Batman even opens his mouth to actually explain some things—a huge step forward for this incredibly emotionally constipated man.

Instead, Nightwing snorts and beats him to it. "Unknowns? More like—"

"Nightwing, please."

"Oh, for Pete's sake, get your head out of your arse and let me do this. The Ghost King is our only hope. I'm summoning him, no matter what you say."

For a long second, Constantine thinks that he'll refuse and he might have to resort to more violent methods of persuasion—which, honestly, Constantine has fantasised about many times during the more boring JL meetings—but eventually, Batman relents and steps out of the way.

"Fine. Nightwing, go check in with Red Robin."

Nightwing has the kind of devious smile that makes John glad he doesn't have kids.

"Oh, don't worry about it, B. Red Robin's coming here. So's Red Hood, I don't need to go anywhere."

"Nightwing—"

"Sh, it's starting." So saying, Nightwing then very obviously ignores Batman's protests with a poker face that even Constantine envies. What he wouldn't give to be able to shut the bat out like that.

The summoning goes quickly, thankfully. The lights flicker, the temperature drops, and the chalk circle erupts in green flames. Standard summoning practices, sure. Even the impromptu appearance of Red Hood and Red Robin—"Did we miss him?", "No, not yet! I got 2:37, what about you guys?"—doesn't throw him off.

It does pique his interest, though. Just what the hell is going on with them? Constantine's weighing up the pros and cons of asking them once all of this is over when the ground splits open and the clawed hand of the Ghost King begins to pull himself out of the ground.

John's a seasoned summoner. It's practically his job, he's done it countless times.

The icey fear that grips his heart, that freezes his breath in his chest, is new.

Pure, unadulterated power floods the area and he feels small, so, so small, like a child playing with things he doesn't understand. When he finally tears his eyes away from the portal, he catches a glimpse of the other magic users in the room, the same horror he feels clear in their faces. Even Captain Marvel stares slackjawed.

The pressure rises, death magic screaming in his ears, almost forcing him to his knees, and suddenly he's not so sure this is a good idea.

Too late to back out now, though.

Sickly green light pours from the crack in the ground, growing brighter and brighter as the giant figure rises, until Constantine has to close his eyes and look away. The last thing he sees are eyes, teeth, horns, a crown so bright that it burns an afterimage into his retinas.

When the light dies down and he opens his eyes again, a humanoid man floats in the centre of the circle. The ground is whole, nothing is burning, the man doesn't even have a crown. Instead, other than the wispy white hair, slightly green skin, and the—you know—floating, the Ghost King appears pretty normal. Huh.

Constantine blinks, rubbing his bleary eyes, and checks around to make sure everyone's okay. Most of the League are doing the same as him, taking fortifying breaths and trying to appear as if they've not just been completely blinded.

Most of them, that is, aside from the Gotham vigilantes.

Batman himself stands upright, arms crossed, looking completely unbothered by the whole thing and John's got to admit, he wishes he could do that, too. That was... a hell of a show.

The others, however, are waving frantically with huge smiles on their faces.

What?

There's a brief, taut silence, as everyone else tries to catch their breath.

As much as he would rather take a bit of a breather, John should probably start making introductions. Unfortunately, he only gets as far as opening his mouth before the Ghost King beats him to it.

"Oh, Ancients, hey guys! It's been forever, how are you? Look at you all, so grown up, wow—Nightwing, buddy, do a flip!"

It doesn't take much to get Nightwing going, and he certainly doesn't leave it at one flip. The whole of the Justice League and Justice League Dark watch with open mouths as Nightwing performs for the Ghost King.

What, and John can't stress this enough, the fuck?

As soon as Nightwing rights himself, Red Hood swats him across the back of the head and calls him a show off.

The Ghost King just laughs as he claps. "There's my little monkey, look at you go! And I'm loving that leather jacket, Hood, is that new? Looks good on you, really your colour. Brings out the red in your helmet."

"Thanks, Uncle D. At least someone around here appreciates fashion."

"Are you kidding me, you know I breathe fashion, need I remind—"

"Need I remind you of the Discowing incident?"

"That was era-appropriate and you know it! Uncle D, tell him it was era-appropriate!"

"It was era-appropriate, but so are crocs and it doesn't make them fashionable." The Ghost King—and holy shit, is this actually the Ghost King? Or did Constantine just accidentally summon a deceased family member, what the fuck is happening here?—turns to look at Red Robin with a smile, resolutely ignorning the argument he created. "How you doing, Double R? You get that tablet Tucker made for you?"

"Yes, thank you! It's so cool, how did he—"

"How's Tucker doing?" Batman interrupts, his hands now hidden underneath his cape.

As soon as the question leaves his lips, everyone groans. Red Robin makes a show of lifting up his wrist and staring at it intently.

"Incredible," Red Hood mutters with a shake of his head.

Even the Ghost King seems put out, rolling his eyes and answering in a flat tone as if he knows Batman isn't interested in what he has to say.

Not for the first time, Constantine feels like he's missing something.

"Tucker's doing very well, thank you for asking."

What follows is the most awkward silence Constantine has ever had the pleasure to be a part of.

All three of the Gotham vigilantes, including the Ghost King, are staring at Batman, waiting for something. Batman's cloak shifts as if he's moving his hands, fidgeting. If Constantine didn't know any better, he'd say he was nervous.

"Good. That's good, I'm glad to hear it."

Instead of saying anything else, the Ghost King just raises his eyebrows and continues to stare at Batman. Has he offended him in some way? Are they all going to die because of this?

After what seems like an agonising few minutes but could only really be a few seconds, Batman's shoulders dip and he takes a breath. "And Jazz?"

They all erupt into shouts, the Ghost King being the loudest. The only thing John can make out is when the Ghost King throws his hand in the air to point at Red Robin with a shout of "Time!"

"1:30.91, we got 1:30.91 on the clock, who's closest?"

"Did you even try to hold it in at all, old man? I'm so disappointed in you. People think you're cool. People think you're suave, I don't understand how they could be so wrong."

"Thank you for that, Hood."

"No, thank you, I won. Again. Because you're so predictable. Actually, I had one minute seventeen, so you held out longer than I thought you would."

Batman pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs loudly.

Constantine feels like doing the same thing.

Whatever. He's going to have to interrupt... whatever this is. There's still a rampaging demon heading their way that they've got to bargain for. He can untangle Batman's personal connection to the Ghost King later. Or he could leave it alone and forget everything about it.

Yeah, he'll do that one.

But before he can actually open his mouth to say anything, the Ghost King, again, beats him to it.

"So, B-Man, did you summon me here for a particular reason, or was it really just so you could ask about Jazz?"

There's a beat of silence before Batman mutters, "I asked about Tucker, too. We've not seen each other in so long, it's only polite."

"And I'm sure you meant it, you're the paragon of manners." The Ghost King nods slow and wide-eyed as if he doesn't believe him at all.

At this point, even Constantine doesn't believe him.

"It has been forever, though." The Ghost King muses, bringing his hand to his chin and folding his legs underneath him. "We should all get together sometime! If you get Alfie to make some of his cookies again, I'll get Clockwork to lend us a pocket dimension where we can spend as much time as we want, deal?"

"It's a deal."

No hesitation at all, incredible.

Hold on. Wait. John has to fight the urge to pinch himself, because this has to be a dream, right? Is Batman actually smiling? He didn't even know he could do that.

An itch niggles at the back of John's mind. He's starting to get an inkling of what's going on here and it's... weird, to say the least.

"Oooh," Nightwing singsongs, like a child in a playground tickled by the very idea of romance.

But then, who's he to judge? John's no stranger to strange bedfellows, that's for sure. Whoever this Jazz is, she must be something incredible—she'd have to be, if Batman can't even go two minutes without asking about her.

"Batman and Jasmine sitting in a tree," Nightwing continues, with both Red Hood and Red Robin joining in for the rest. "K—I—S—S—I—"

"Stop," Batman growls, completely drowned out by the Ghost King's laughter, but...

But.

It all suddenly clicks for John.

The Ghost King Phantom.

Her Royal Highness, Princess Jasmine Phantom.

Jazz.

"Holy shit, mate," John breathes, unable to stop himself as everyone looks his way. "You have the hots for the Princess of the Infinite Realms?"

The Justice League meeting room has never descended into chaos quicker.

[diwtara]

Iva is in the revolutionary army -> Robin spent her two years with the revolutionary army -> Robin knows where Sanji was during the two years and exactly what he was getting up to

You really cant hide anything from her

[kroosluvr]

alright can we just pretend i have my life under control thanks

[val-of-the-north]

Potential Ensha info from the DLC

Me and @katyspersonal were hoping for more potential lore on Ensha, surprisingly enough... and we might have actually got our wish somehow. Let's take a look at the description of Ensha's bones for a second, as well as their properties...

While they don't look it at first glance, the description specifies the bones are "golden", and they can replenish HP when it's reduced. Gold and healing go hand-in-hand in Elden Ring's setting, so this propriety makes sense by considering the golden nature of the remains.

This description alone doesn't tell us much however. It describes the remains as belonging to an ancient lord named Ensha who is currently known as a soulless king. However, Shadow of the Erdtree might give us more hints about who he was prior to becoming an elaborate set of armor.

In the Lands of Shadow we can come across a very rare crafting material, mostly found around Scadu Altus and in the Shadow Keep and Fort of Reprimand. It is also held by the various Black Knights found around the world. This material is the Blessed Bone Shard.

These blessed bones shine gold with the blessing of the Scadutree, and can be used to craft many interesting items, including Festive Grease, Golden Vows (the tool, not the incantation), and Sunwarmth Stones. Two out of three of these items are directly aligned with the Golden Order (though the Festive Grease is likely part of the Shaman tradition which Marika made sure to somehow preserve), and one of them is directly tied to HP regeneration, the same passive power as Ensha's bones.

Since the other ingredients needed to craft it are a Spiritgrave Stone and a Black Pyrefly, neither connected to healing, I assume that part of the power comes from the blessed bones.

If this is the case, could it mean that the ancient lord Ensha participated in the Crusade as a warrior on the side of the Erdtree prior to his death? And that his bones were blessed because of his great service, as it was "the greatest honor that can be granted to the dead" after all. Him being some sort of lord or king might have also allowed his remains to be brought back to the Lands Between for a proper burial, or maybe even to craft this armor as a means to immortalize him. If so, his death must have been prior to the Lands of Shadow being hidden away by Marika.

Now, one could still question why Ensha's bones aren't as shiny as these shards are, but perhaps his blessing has faded with time. After all, the potency of the blessed bones we pick up is much greater than that of his armor, offering continuous healing to everyone nearby as opposed to just when our health gets low.

I think Ensha himself might have rested peacefully for years until after the Night of the Black Knives or the Shattering, which led to the rise of Those Who Live in Death through Deathroot. There is a possibility he himself is part of them, especially with the way he is described.

He is soulless, which has a deep connection to both Godwyn and other perished Demigods of the Night of the Black Knives. There seems to be a connection between death, undeath and the lack of a soul, strengthening the connection between Ensha and the undead.

He is further described as the king of the "lost and desperate", which seems to harken back to how Fia describes Those Who Live in Death as "the meek, and the many".

The connection seems slightly more obvious, as in Japanese she refers to them as "the weak" (弱き者) and she describes herself as their "guardian/protector" (庇護者). Meanwhile, Ensha is the King of those who "cling to/depend on" him (縋り付く) which seems to hold similar connotations of a weaker group of people needing a stronger figure for protection. In that case, Ensha might have been a surrogate king of sorts, but clearly not good enough to truly become their lord, a title fully reserved for the godly flesh of Godwyn. Or maybe, just like Fia, he was simply a self-appointed protector for them and had no higher aims.

The way in which he operates is still quite a mystery though. The man who wears the armor is also named Ensha, just like this ancient lord, so unless he is simply cosplaying him, there might be something deeper going on...

The DLC also introduced an interesting NPC enemy: Rakshasa. Named after a demon, the description of her armor makes a peculiar comment about following a certain path to "become" Rakshasa itself, hinting that the woman we just beat was just one embodiment of it.

Now, Ensha would be a bit different, but what if he also worked in a similar manner? As in, those who wear his remains become him by extension. But in that case, why would this king follow Gideon Ofnir? Is it because of his desire to reach the Haligtree? Perhaps he wants to confront Miquella since in his kindness he seems to have forsaken Those Who Live in Death, and if the Golden Epitaph is to be believed, agrees and maybe even endorses their destruction.

The vow of peace of the Roundtable Hold might be why someone like D doesn't strike him down on the spot. Or maybe hiding as a simple suit of armor proves to be quite effective in avoiding detection from the hunters of his kind.

[evanbi-ckley]

things i do not need: more wip ideas

and yet

[outism-had-a-purpose]

Sinclair gets a new mirror world identity. It's exactly the same as the one they're in, but in here his hometown they all preferred pop christmas songs to the classic ones, and so by extension Kromer does also do her whole thing with them.

Between Two Worlds is to the tune of Mariah Carey's 'All I Want For Christmas.'

[mewtwo24]

Okay but like. Two things about the volume 8 statue [redacted] chapter.

Firstly. By god no amount of "yeah it was unhinged" comments on this website prepared me for whatever the fuck that was. I need at least 5 business days to process.

Second, was I the only one who read that scene as:

Hua Cheng, teeming with self-satisfaction to see Mu Qing near writhing with scorned disgust and fury: this was a 100% successful trip

Xie Lian: our statues are fucking in Mu Qing's palace oh god oh fuck what do you m e a n successful

Hua Cheng, smirk getting even bigger: this was a 100% successful trip

[hotvintagepoll]

i KNOW he wasn’t in the original poll, but i think dwight frye should’ve still been in the pool for renfield. as a treat :-)

nah y'all he had his time in the sun! let another guy get a go