#brought it up to her a bit later and she said she 100% stood by that decision and throught process

[i-like-books-and-women]

One more "hehe projection" onto Ruben post for the night.

Ruben didn't realised how fucked his mom's behavior was until he met the others. Like he'd be telling what he thought was a "cute fun story" about his childhood and finish to the others looking at him like "what the actual fuck". And he's like "what?" And they're like "dude that's so fucked up and not normal"

And the rest was Veronica hating history

[b14augrana]

Scrubber

Your first time versing Lyon was the match of your dreams

Barça Femení x teen!reader

pt. 3 masterlist

Warnings: lots of happiness and not proofread as per usual … 😁

A/N: i forgot to mention that mapi's knee is 100% functioning and not crippled in this series!!!! i’ve decided to turn it into a series because i love our hay day obsessed reader so much.

also, reader takes alexia’s place in scoring a golazo because our wonderkid needs her time to shine and what better time to shine than in a uwcl final 🪄🪄 (peep my reference in the fic to the gif im so smart)

we need a nickname for little miss wonderkid so i dont constantly refer to her as reader so plz suggest some in my asks 🥹

You were way too nervous for the final to function. You regretted eating breakfast that morning because it felt like you were about to throw it all up.

Honestly, you were even nervous to look at the players. You stood timidly between Lucy and Irene in the line, secretly hoping you never had to leave the tunnel. You did not want the likes of Ada Hegerberg charging towards little 16-year-old you.

You glanced down at the ‘NV15’ written on your wrist in black. That forever-present question of 'What would Vidić do?' loomed in your mind.

He wouldn’t be worrying about anyone on the opposition. He’d just be worried about breaking the Brexit tackle world record and keeping everyone in white as far away from the goal as possible.

The officials at the end of the tunnel signalled to both teams, which meant it was time. As you emerged out of the tunnel, walking out to the sound of a stadium full of culers, you didn’t feel scared. The cheers from all around the stadium deafened you, but also made you feel an insane amount of pride.

As you stood beside your teammates, the Barcelona anthem blasted on the speakers and the crowd became a choir as they sung the anthem loud and proud. Your attention was in the stands, looking at all the people that had come to watch. You almost teared up when you spotted a little girl and her older brother wearing a jersey with your name on it. Your name. Just having a mascot blew you away, so seeing people you probably weren’t much older than, wearing jerseys with your name on the back, was a crazy concept.

It made you think about the future. It made you hope that one day, you’d grow up to be some little girl’s idol the way Vidić is yours.

“Get ready to shake hands, (Y/N),” Irene reminded you, noticing that you looked a bit spaced out. You brought yourself back to the present and nodded, sticking your hand out to shake the long line of Lyon hands.

When Alexia asked you to bend down and hold the match day pennant, it almost felt like blasphemy. Your mouth was slightly agape as she thrusted it into your hand. “But why me?”

“My knee is no good, it’s better if I stand,” she explained.

“But why m–”

“Just hold it, nena!” Alexia laughed, getting back in the line. You crouched down, holding the pennant in one hand and bracing the ground with the other as you smiled gingerly for the camera.

As soon as the photographer lowered his camera, you sprung to your feet and gave the pennant back to Alexia. “There you go, capi!” you said happily, motioning to Renard who was approaching with their own pennant to exchange. Alexia laughed and patted you on the back, mumbling a quick ‘gracías’ before turning away.

You walked over to the bench and shrugged your jacket off, folding it neatly for one of the team management to take to the locker room later on. With one last meaningful glance at your wrist, you ran onto the field to take your position. Irene was with you in the center and Lucy covered the right while Ona took care of the left. Jona had told you to be prepared for Mapi to come on, so you kept that in mind too.

As soon as the whistle was blown, you were relieved to see that Aitana, Mariona, Caro and Salma had already gotten things under control. That gave you time to scope out the Lyon front three and think about how to handle them.

You thought about what Lucy said. ‘Don’t get hurt trying to do extreme tackles.’

At the end of the day, it all came down to instinct. When Dumornay started running at you with the ball, her feet moving too quick for you to focus on, you knew what you were going to do next had to be purely instinctual. This wasn’t the match for calculated tackles.

It was a fearless tackle. It wasn’t even much of a tackle, actually; you had just gotten to the ground right in her path and made contact with the ball first before she even touched you. When she did touch you, the top of her boot got caught on your abdomen, knocking her over. It was the consequence of her own speed and momentum.

With the ball at your feet, you did what you always did best — kick it as hard as you could and hope it goes well. You must’ve hoped extremely hard or hoped to the right deity, because the ball landed right at Aitana’s feet. Not an inch in front.

With one touch, she had beaten her marker. When Aitana got the ball, it was almost always a goal, and this time was no different; before you could even register that your ball had been kept in play, let alone found a player of your own, it had beaten Endler’s desperate hands and hit the back of the net. The stadium has the loudest atmosphere you’ve ever experienced after Aitana’s goal.

She came running to you, her arms outstretched. You threw yourself into her, hugging her tightly. The rest of the team came shortly after, suffocating you two in a big team hug. You heard some muffled voices praising you and Aitana, but you were too stunned by how quickly it all happened to even register their words. There were many pats on your back and side hugs before the game reset and you were back to your centerback position, kissing the writing on your wrist.

“Aparejo increíble (Y/N), and the pass! Magnífico!” Irene said, pulling you close and ruffling your hair (to which you huffed and slicked it back down) before running back to her position.

You didn’t actually intend to make that pass, so was it that special? Aitana did score from it, but she just has magical feet.

The match had flown by, both teams only separated by one goal at the 90th minute. Lyon were desperate for a goal. Barcelona were desperate for another. Many changes had been made, including Mapi and Pina coming on.

You watched as Diani came down the left wing and somehow managed to beat Lucy and Mapi, which meant you were going to have to try tidy up at the back and not let Diani get to Cata, the last hope.

At first, you just jockeyed. You held her off and tried to delay her, which worked; her stepovers were useless and she couldn’t get past you by tapping and running… but then she did.

She took a touch just wide of you, giving herself heaps of space to dribble up to goal if she was quick enough to retrieve the ball. The big underlying issue was, your jockeying had led you two up to the box. You could either get a card and risk her scoring from a penalty or worse — not do anything and let her put it in. You would rather break your Hay Day login streak than let that happen.

As she lurched forwards to get another touch on the ball, it was like everything was in slow motion. Time slowed down as you extended your leg and thrusted your entire body forwards, cushioning your fall by sliding on your arm across the damp grass and towards the ball. You closed your eyes as she got closer to your face, hoping that if you didn’t see it happen, the collision wouldn’t hurt as much. If this tackle went wrong, it would be over for you, for Barça.

Diani’s opening had been a gift from God himself, so you prepared yourself to see her celebrating happily, the ball rolling into the net when you opened your eyes, but when you finally did open them, the ball wasn’t in the net. Diani wasn’t celebrating.

She was lying on her chest, scrambling to get to her feet. The ball was out, discarded somewhere near the barriers as a ball boy passed a new one to Lucy to throw in. Cheers had rung through the stadium upon your last-ditch tackle, but you had been too distracted to pay attention to them. You had been too focused on trying to execute the perfect tackle that would either make or break the game.

The only thing you guys needed was another goal to really seal the deal. Lyon were getting dangerously close, you needed a goal.

When Lucy had played the ball in, you moved a bit further up the field, watching the play. You noticed Caro receiving the ball, and then you noticed the absence in the middle of the box. You scanned for Aitana or Pina or anybody, but they were all marked by figures like Renard and Carpenter or in other words, brick walls that were not letting them in any time soon.

It was all, pure, instinct. You ran– no, sprinted up the field, flailing your hands in the air. “Caro, Caro!” you screamed, motioning to the middle of the box, begging for a cross.

The cross she delivered from the right wing was set to land just in front of you. You couldn’t reach it for a volley and you sure as hell couldn’t bicycle kick it in. It was travelling fast and getting nearer by the second, but that was the advantage.

Without a second thought, you jumped up. Your body was basically horizontal in the air as you flew forwards, forehead connecting with the ball. It was a shame you couldn’t watch it shoot past Endler, burying itself right in the bottom left corner. You flew into the net as well, and the only way you realised you had scored was when you sat up and looked to your side to see the ball. That’s also the only way you realised you were in the goal.

You had never stood up faster or yelled louder. You zipped past Endler and ran down the field towards the nearest camera. Your first goal of your career couldn’t have been more perfect, so you needed a celebration to match.

Aitana appeared by your side, and as you two ran side-by-side, you pointed to the people in the stands. It was a simple but meaningful celebration; it was the same celebration Vidić had once done, and you remembered it vividly. In fact, it was one of your favourite moments.

You ran to the corner flag where the rest of your team were, and you all fell into another affectionate huddle. Lucy squeezed your side. “You’re in the wrong sport, I think you’d do well as a professional diver!” she jeered, having to yell her words over the noise. You grinned at her and hugged the woman tightly right before being instructed to reset.

The ball had barely started moving again before the referee blew the final whistle. Everyone from the sidelines jumped from their seats and ran onto the field, and the people on the field ram towards your goal. Cata booted the ball into the air and jumped on top of the big hug, and then Pina followed. There was singing and dancing and flags being thrown and tears and hugs for days.

It was happy moment upon happy moment for everyone as it all sunk in — you had finally, finally beat Olympique Lyonnais in a Champions League final for the first time in your history. You had helped beat Lyon and make history with this team, and you had won your first ever Champions League and quadruple, but you had to give credit where it was due.

You knew if you never had a role model like Nemanja Vidić, nothing would’ve happened the way it did for you against Lyon.

Being a 16-year-old girl with such a fiery passion to defend and hold it down at the back wasn’t easy. There wasn’t many defenders that played for the badge the way Vidić did. The reason you loved him so much was because he exerted such an immense sense of pride and dedication to his club, and that was the type of defender you wanted to be.

That was the type of defender you had been today.

You couldn’t believe Keira and Patri when they ran up to you saying that the officials wanted to see you so you could receive the Player of the Match award once again. Your jaw was dropped and you went red as they basically dragged you away from the locker rooms and towards the officials. Your cheeks were still red from embarrassment as you took the photo.

You learned that you couldn’t just slink away into the locker rooms after such a big match, so you spent a solid 10 minutes talking to fans all around the stadium. It was a bit awkward for you at first because most of them were either as old as Alexia or literally your age, but you figured you’d have to get used to it.

The best part about the whole day was, when you eventually got back to the locker room and picked your phone up, you had reached level 300 on Hay Day.

As if one major achievement wasn’t enough.

[marchsfreakshow]

Cigarette Tension [Michael De Santa]

You and Michael De Santa; you're friends with Tracey De Santa, and she brings you home one day when Amanda and Jimmy are out.

Moodboard made by @lilthbunny

Sort of a self insert fic cause I'm down bad for this man. (And as gender neutral as I could make it lol)

Could be suggestive. -18 be warned; Addiction to smoking is referenced.

Your perspective.

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

Tracey pulled up in the driveway, and I stared wide-eyed at her house. It was a mansion, let alone one with a pool and a tennis court of all things! She got out of the car and my jaw was slack. "Y/N c'mon! Fame Or Shame is gonna start sooonnn!" She wiggled a bit as I brought myself out of my trance and stepped out of the car.

I had become friends with Tracey De Santa recently after accidentally bumping into her when I was shopping. We apologized after a while, but at first, she was telling me off, annoying me with 'what's your excuse?!' And 'im from money you know?! Daddy can kill you instantly!' I rolled my eyes a bit before picking up her stuff.

"lemme pay you back."

"This was $100..?" She asked, staring at the broken perfume bottle on the ground.

"Okay? I have $200 to spend still." She just smiled and I took her back into the perfume shop.

A few weeks later, and more asks later, I was finally stood by her front door. "I think Jimmy and Mom are out. Daddy's being lazy still in the living room." She grinned. I chuckled in response and walked in with her. "Daddy! My friend Y/N is here."

I followed the chirpy girl into the living room. It was magnificent, and much more than my small apartment. But the man sitting on the sofa took my attention. He was in his 50s at least. Chubby... but attractive. He looked over with a drink of whiskey in one hand.

We made eye contact immediately, and it was like I was captured by him, even though I was just looking into his eyes. I couldn't let my thoughts run wild here, I just couldn't. No one said anything, but Tracey could tell I was staring. "Y/N. Eugh. I'll be in my room sorting this shopping out. Be right back."

I sort of mumbled an okay and leaned against a wall awkwardly. Michael went back to the TV. "you can come and sit down."

"oh I'm okay, thank you though."

As soon as I said that, the man stood up. He turned off the TV, and quietly went outside, holding out a cigarette box behind him. I stared hungrily at the box while it disappeared. The debate and war in my head were eventually won, and I nonchalantly joined him outside. "You smell like you smoke inside."

"You smell like an addict."

"And look at that, you lured me out here." I felt so confident now. My own guess was the cigarette between my fingers, and the lighter I was about to light for the both of us.

We made eye contact again as the cigarettes were lit and we took our breaths.

Tracey clearly was busy sorting out my own shopping compared to hers. I bought barely any expensive things, but it seemed she got everything that was expensive. "How did you meet my angel then?" The word 'angel' came out like sarcasm, but I felt the love within it.

"I broke her perfume by accident when we bumped into each other. I decided I was nice that day, and bought her a new one." Michael raised an eyebrow, side-eyeing me for a second. I fidgeted around a bit as we took our time to smoke.

A few minutes went by before he stomped his cigarette out, I wanted to take my time. I already fucked up my cigarette sobriety, why not enjoy it? Michael's eyes found mine again. A war was happening in my brain again. He was attractive, for a 50-something-year-old. But god he was married! With two kids my age, a bit younger. Clearly.

I was finishing my cigarette up, and I stomped it out soon after. He stood in front of me barely blocking the bright sun. "Michael."

"I can tell..."

"Tell what?"

He placed a kiss on my cheek, then my neck. I was confused and turned away. "You got it figured out.", Michael winked at me, then headed back inside.

I was standing there, against a wall, in my friend's backyard, questioning why her dad just kissed me after a cigarette. He smelled vintage. Old cologne, worn-out suits, and the cigarettes.

When I figured he was back to watching TV or something, I walked in awkwardly. The man was distracted with making a bowl of chips in the kitchen. After taking a deep breath, I headed up the stairs and found Tracey's room right in front of the stairs. She was sleeping. I wasn't sure for how long, but she was asleep. The other door, I assumed was Jimmy's by the sign on it. "Welp, fuck Fame or Shame I guess," I muttered, grabbing my own bags, that held my shopping.

"Why don't you stay for the evening? You're nice. And you seem like a good friend to my girl." Michael said suddenly. The tension I felt last time had come back.

"oh no, I really couldn't. I have all this, and I wanna get it all home quickly." I stuttered out, feeling embarrassed for no reason. I barely knew these people! Why was this middle-aged man so attractive and why did I have to make friends with his daughter!? It seemed like the war in my brain never stopped. My nerves calmed when I was on my own. Or I was drinking. So many things calmed me, but staying the night wasn't one of them.

"No seriously. C'mon. I'm ordering Chinese food tonight. D'you like Chinese food?" Michael just smiled and patted the seat next to him. The TV was playing some sort of old film. A noir film.

As I sat down next to him, awkwardly, I nodded. "I get takeaway a lot."

"oh?"

"I'm not incredibly well off, but I got 400 from my aunt recently. So, I paid my rent for a few months, and y'know. Met Tracey-." My mouth blabbered. I waffled a lot before Michael cut me off.

"You're staying then?"

"Mhm."

"Good! I'm sure Amanda will take to you." His eyes stuck to the movie. It was intimate. I leaned my chin on my knees while attempting to watch the movie too.

Time passed. Movies and shows went by. We ate, and drank, and he had one last cigarette. I wasn't sure where Amanda and Jimmy were, and Tracey was a deep sleeper. "Where is everyone?"

"Jimmy'll come back soon. And Amanda probably found somewhere else to sleep."

"That... sounds bad." My tone was slightly guilty. Not like I had done anything anyway, but it was 4 p.m. at this point, and no one had come back to Michael's place.

"My relationship is fucked. Might as well keep it up."

"What happened? If you don't mind talking about it.."

"I fucked another stripper. She decided her tennis coach was the best person to go to after. Because of course, she did. In my own house, on my own bed. Of all fucking places."

Michael kept going about their relationship, but I could tell he was leaving some details out. Like he couldn't tell me every part of the story. When he stopped and looked over at me, I held his hand softly. He used his hands a lot clearly. Rugged, short, dirty nails. My thumb softly rubbed over his thumb. Empathy wasn't my strong suit, but I could try. The man's eyes softened for once and placed the same hand on my thigh.

I was feeling something. But I was so, distracted by looking at him, I couldn't tell what he wanted. Whatever it was, I didn't know if I should give it to him. The concentration on my face became obvious, and he backed down a bit, moving his hand away. "You didn't..have to.." I whispered, inching closer to him and his alcoholic breath. He kept his silence and went back to the position we were in a few seconds ago. It was like a clock was ticking. A time bomb about to explode.

This was lust. Not love. I didn't want to be known as the one who fucked my best friend's dad. Not particularly. But, he held me captive when I stared at him. Why was he fucking me with his eyes? That look I didn't see often, I knew it. All he did was hold onto my waist as I faced him, sitting on my knees. I didn't know what I wanted. I didn't know who was around. All I knew was that I just wanted him. For some fucked reason. Daddy issues I guess.

His hair was a bit messed up after being inside all day. The red shirt, the baggy trousers. His hands. His eyes, and his 5 o'clock shadow that was still there at 7pm. Everything about this feeling was fucked. Everything. But god he was so handsome. At any moment, his wife could come through the door, or his son, or Tracey could wake up, and kick me out of the house for being weird with her dad. My eyes screamed nervousness apparently.

"We'll be okay."

He kissed me gently, and he held me gently. This felt insane. What was I doing?! Kissing a married man!? While I kissed him back, my thoughts were like a race track. Where did I drop off my shopping? Nothing sounded like it broke, but maybe something did. "Are you alright?" Michael rested his hand on the side of my face, looking concerned.

"You're distracted."

"I suppose so."

"Nothing matters right now. Calm yourself."

We were entangled in each other again. I sat on his lap, straddling him. He held the small of my back. I gripped his shoulders. Our breaths mixed when we pulled away from each other. The TV was still playing noir movies. It didn't distract him, thank god.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?"

oh. shit.

I went wide-eyed and got off Michael immediately, my embarrassment now noticeable. Tracey stared shocked at her dad as I hurried behind her, grabbed my stuff and headed for the door.

"Y/N!"

"Tracey, angel.. listen."

"DAD! I can't fucking believe you! You're worse than Mom sometimes, Jesus!"

She stomped out into the backyard, so I took this opportunity to move away and go home. Thankfully, Michael didn't follow. Not until I got out the gate anyway. He stopped the car next to me and stared apologetically at me. "Just let me drive you home,"

Awkwardness filled the car, my bags in the back, and I was sitting in the passenger seat, looking out of the window. I refused to look anywhere but the window. I just couldn't look over to him. The man driving me home. The man who I was making out with a few minutes ago. Clouds went past quickly, and the bags were the only noise coming from inside the car.

The drive almost killed me inside it was so long. But we got there, eventually. Taking a deep breath, I just opened the door quickly, grabbed my stuff and closed the car door behind me.

He lingered.

"Don't linger, Michael..." I mumbled. The car window was open, and I knew he wanted to say something. My front door opened, my foot entered the hallway, and I didn't decide to look back. He stood there, by my front door. "I'm home now. Thanks.."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, it's my fault." I kept walking away, into the living room, but because he was in the doorway, I couldn't close it.

"Alright. But you know you can come back."

"I think Tracey's opinion of me has drastically changed. I doubt it." My mutters continued. I acted uninterested and bored. But I wasn't mad at him, not really.

"Just...come back soon okay?" The door shut. Finally. My chest felt less heavy now, so I almost slid my way into the kitchen.

A creak.

Not my footsteps. They couldn't be.

"Michael please.."

"I don't think anyone will realise."

We just stood there, staring at each other. "How about a smoke?"

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

The only tag today: @beetleblunt

[truerhearts]

i love you - satoru gojo one shot

masterlist | ao3 | requests

gojo x fem!reader fluff

gojo realizes he's in love with you and plans on telling you

3rd person

1.7k words

100% fluff

Satoru was in love. There was no question of it he was very sure of his feelings. And he knew exactly when it happened, too.

It was about two weeks ago now. They had hung out all weekend doing absolutely nothing, and they both had an amazing time just passing the days together. He’d be playing games, she’d be studying. They’d watch a movie and cook together, and then they’d fall asleep in his bed, tangled in the sheets and in each others’ arms. He held her close despite the fact he was in an uncomfortable position, and she was also heating him like an oven. He didn’t care, he just loved the feeling of her being close. They’d laugh together, kiss a bit, then fall asleep. Pure bliss.

Sunday afternoon rolled around, and they regrettably parted ways. He let her keep his sweatshirt she’d been wearing all weekend. (It was one of his favourites, but he loved seeing her in it.) And of course, they already had plans to hang out again soon. 

It was the moment he closed his apartment door - the moment when his living space suddenly became a lot quieter, more empty - was when he noticed something. It was odd to be feeling this way because he’d lived alone since he moved out… it never felt this empty before.

Then everything started to make sense. 

He realized he was in love. 

He smiled to himself as he stared at the closed door. “Damn,” he whispered. 

But that was nearly two weeks ago now - and he hasn’t mentioned it to her yet. 

Tonight, he was taking her out on a date: dinner at a rather upscale restaurant. She thought it was too fancy for just a casual date, expressing it would be better if they had a reason to go, like a birthday or anniversary. But Satoru insisted.

“(y/n), don’t worry. Just wear something pretty and I’ll pick you up at 8.” 

She could hear him smiling through the phone. 

“Alright, if you’re sure.” She said smiling back, twirling a piece of her hair in her fingers.

“Of course I’m sure. I want to treat you tonight, is that so bad?” 

She giggled. “You’re too good to me,” 

“You deserve the world. I’ll see you later.”

They said they’re goodbyes and hung up. She was on her bed, phone on her chest, lying there wondering how she got so lucky. The sun was beginning to set as the evening rolled around. She was just applying the finishing touches to her makeup before examining herself in the mirror. She looked pretty, she thought. She put on a bit more makeup than usual, a nice evening look. And he’d dress was a short black slip she only brought out for nights like these. It was one of her favourites. 

She had just finished applying her lipstick when she heard a knock at her door. Her heart skipped a beat as she knew it was.

He was on the other side, using the slight reflection on the window to touch up his hair. He stopped once he heard the door unlock. 

The door opened, revealing his date for the evening. She looked absolutely stunning, and he couldn’t help but grin widely as he stared down at her. His eyes traced her from her head to her feet, soaking in every bit of her.

“You look beautiful.” he simply said, his crystalline blue eyes sparkling even more than usual, if that was possible.

Heat quickly rose to her cheeks as she shied away a bit. “Stop,” she giggled, she stepped aside to let him in.

He stepped inside, “No, really, I mean it. You look so beautiful.” he closed the door behind him, and he stood in front of her. He leaned in to place a gentle kiss on her lips. 

Her heart fluttered and butterflies filled her stomach. They had been seeing each other for almost four months but he still made her elated with his words. 

He pulled away shortly after. “Are you ready to go?” He asked. 

“Yes, I just need to grab my coat and purse.” She said as she quickly pulled her coat off the coatrack and grabbed her purse that was on a shelf by the door. 

He took her coat from her and held it for her while she put her arms in. (What a gentleman!)

He let her out first and he closed the door behind them.

The establishment was far more upscale than she was expecting. She had heard of it before, but never imagined what it would be like on the inside; it exuded an air of sophistication that seemed fit for royalty. They walked down the grand hallway to meet the hostess, the click of her heels echoing on the marble floor with every step. She felt his arm wrap around her waist, pulling her close as they approached the desk. 

-

Dinner came and went. They both had a lovely time and their waitress complimented them on being such a cute couple. He took care of the bill, not letting her see how much it cost. She imagined what it could have been and even though he insisted it was okay, she still felt uneasy about going somewhere so fancy. But she was grateful nonetheless. 

They were finally back at his place. The lights were dim, and it felt cozy in his little apartment. 

She was still wearing her dress, sitting on the couch waiting for him to bring her a cup of tea.

He walked back into the room with two mugs prepared. He handed her one before taking a seat beside her. 

“Thank you so much ‘Toru,” She expressed, savouring the warmth as the tea cascaded down her throat, leaving a comforting trail in its wake.

“Anytime, princess.” He initiated the ritual of television without a specific show in mind. “Do you want to sleep over again?” 

“Yes, I’d love to. Can I borrow some clothes?” she asked.

“Of course, but don’t change yet, this dress looks too good on you.” He sighed and relaxed himself, leaning back into the couch. He unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt and took a sip from his own mug. They stared at the tv. Nothing significant was playing, it was just on the front page of Netflix. 

The ambiance suggested a different night, a shift in the air. Her instincts tingled, signaling a change in him—quieter, less exuberant.

As the quite expanded, discomfort settled in her bones. Attempting nonchalance, she ventured, "You seem a bit quieter tonight. Everything okay?"

He chuckled a bit. “Yes, I’m fine. I’m great actually. Better than I have been in a while.” he tapped his fingers on his mug. “You know it’s because of you, right?” He asked, his voice low and alluring. He turned his head towards her, his blue eyes peeking out from long white lashes.

Her eyes widened slightly, the conversation taking a turn she wasn’t expecting. She didn’t know if she heard him correctly. “Me?” she stammered.

He gently set his mug aside, the tv flickering in the background. “Yes, you.” His gaze moved back towards the tv for a moment as she soaked in his words. “Everything is just better when you’re around. And my apartment feels so empty whenever you leave.” He exuded confidence with every word he uttered. There was no hesitation; he was sure of his words. She was speechless but absorbed his sincerity; this was the first time he had been so open with her.

He met her eyes again. “I guess… what I’m trying to say is… I love you, (y/n).” A warm smile accompanied the words that dripped so easily off his lips, sweet like honey.

Her breath caught in her throat as she was still left speechless. Unable to form words to convey how she was feeling, she simply leaned in to kiss him.

It was unexpected, but he quickly obliged and leaned into her lips. He grabbed her mug and placed it on the coffee table before deepening the kiss further, his fingers quickly getting tangled in her hair. They parted for a moment as he felt her pulling away slightly.

She took in the sight of him: his messy white hair, his half-unbuttoned shirt, his rolled-up sleeves revealing toned forearms. He looked more attractive to her than usual, maybe it was because of what he said. Heat rushed to her face and chest, leaving her looking flushed. 

He looked a bit worried as she still hadn’t said anything withdrawing his hand from her hair.

“I…” She shied away. “Toru, you still make me so nervous,” she giggled, a bit embarrassed.

“Was it too soon?” He asked. She’d never seen him this worried before.

“No…” She bit her lip. “I… love you too.” She managed to utter.

He sighed with relief. “Jesus, (y/n).” He ran a hand through his hair. “You really know how to make a guy sweat.”  

“I’m sorry, it’s just… I’m shy.” She gave him a sheepish grin, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment. Inwardly, she chided herself for feeling self-conscious even after four months with him.

He gently cupped her face. “You’re so cute. This is why I love you.” He said it again. Those three words. She didn’t have time to reply as his lips were already on hers again. His hands found her body once more, one on the bare skin of her thigh, his fingertips just gracing the hem of her dress. And his other hand made its way to the nape of her neck, once more getting tangled in her hair. He appreciated every inch of her. She was so soft, so feminine.

They parted for a moment, and he met her eyes through heavy lids. “You don’t need to be shy around me, (y/n).” He purred.

He closed the space once again. She gripped the collar of his shirt, pulling him in even closer. Her stomach was doing flips and somersaults. The emotions he stirred within her with his looks, and his actions, and his words, were as intense as they were first time they kissed. She swore he did it intentionally, knowing precisely what to say or do to make her heart race with delight.

This is Satoru Gojo… He knew exactly what he was doing.

[doyouknowbtsswag]

I Found You |Su-Hyeok|

(Spoilers)

I tapped my pencil against my desk listening to whatever the teacher was saying. I looked at the board and saw some notes to take. I took my time writing wanting it to be neat. I try my best to look presentable, wanting to meet my parents proud. It's not like they were strict I want to make them proud even though they aren't pushy. It's nice hearing my parents talk to my family about my grades. It wasn't just for them, I wanted to impress Su-Hyeok. We've talked before and we're pretty good friends but I want to be more. Will he know that? Absolutely not, I like being with him and I don't want to ruin our friendship even if I wanted more. I smiled to myself waiting till the bell rang so I could talk to him on the way to the cafeteria. He'd go sit with his friends unfortunately for me, I lost a friend because I wasn't cool enough so I end up talking to random people every day. I wasn't that talkative but I managed to talk to two other girls I wanted to show her I didn't need her. Once the bell rang I packed up my stuff and went outside the classroom to wait for him.

"Jesus, you scared the shit out of me," I said looking at Su-Hyeok grinning.

"Your so easy to sneak up on" He chuckled as a smacked his chest lightly.

"I am not, I just didn't expect a random voice to be right behind me," I said as we made our way to the cafeteria. "How was class?"

"Boring"

"Fooling around?" I asked jokingly raising an eyebrow.

"Maybe," He said smiling.

"Well my class wasn't that great either, I felt like I was going to fall asleep" I sighed. "But I have to work hard"

"No, you need to relax a bit." He said putting his arm around my shoulder in a joking manner, unfortunately. "You need to do something fun and not spend all your free time studying."

"I'll have you know I binge-watch shows and listen to music"

"Didn't you dance and sing in middle school?"

"Yes"

"Do you miss it?"

"Every once and a while I regret quitting," I said. "But there's nothing I can do now"

"You could still sign up," He said. "I'll even watch you perform"

"Maybe" I smiled.

"That should be a yes," He said. "I want to see you dance at least once"

"Like I said maybe." I smiled as he took his arm off my shoulder as we made it to the cafeteria.

"Can't wait for you to say yes later today" He said before walking over to his friends.

I sighed and looked for On-Jo and I-Sak. I saw On-Jo wave her wand to signal me over. I walked over and sat next to her.

"Why is your face all red?" On-Jo asked as I brought out my lunchbox.

"Su-Hyeok" I mumbled. "He's so oblivious"

"Everyone knows about your little crush except him," I-Sak said pointing her chopstick at me. "Just tell him"

"Absolutely not"

"Oh come on," On-Jo said.

"I don't want to lose him," I said taking a bite out of my apple. "I'd rather suffer"

"Don't be overdramatic" I-Sak said

"I'm not"

"Anyways how did you do on the test in Science?" I-Sak asked.

"I got a 95," I said proudly.

"I'm surprised it's not a 100" On-Jo joked

"Oh whatever," I said nudging her smiling. "And you?"

"Looks like we've got to clean up," She said changing the subject. "We'll be back we're just putting our trays back"

"Alright," I said watching them leave.

"Hey, Y/n? I know we don't talk much" I looked up and saw Cheong-San standing in front of the table. "Could you help me out with something?"

"Uh, sure? Depends on what it is" I said packing my lunch box.

"Can you tell On-Jo to meet me in front of the school later, I have to tell her something"

"I think I know what it is so of course" I grinned as he blushed.

"Don't tell anyone okay?"

"I won't," I said standing up. "Good luck"

"Thank you"

"Don't mention it" I smiled and watched him walk away.

I stood waiting for On-Jo and I-Sak to come back. I started to daydream till I heard a bunch of steps. I looked over and saw a bunch of students running in the cafeteria. Someone closed the door on the rest and banging was seen through the glass that it shattered open. Students flooded the cafeteria as chaos quickly spread. I was getting bumped into left and right. I stood up on the table to see what was truly going on. My heart dropped at the sight. People eating others and quickly turning into monsters to spread whatever was going on. I looked around for a place to run but it was almost impossible to leave. The sprinklers went off making everything worse. I saw Cheong-San help On-Jo go through a window and sighed in relief at least one of my friends will survive. I felt an arm tug on me and saw Su-Hyeok pulling me down by my hand.

"We have to go," He said as he grabbed a chair as if it was a shield to run outside. I almost slipped on but quickly caught myself

We ran to the stairs and I followed Su-Hyeok. I wasn't bothered to pay attention to the fact that we were holding hands. We stopped seeing a man on top of a ladder before falling down. As they were distracted we moved the ladder so we were able to get to a window.

"Be careful" He said as he climbed up The window opened and he was pulled through. I started to climb but the ladder started shaking. I looked down and saw a few zombies grabbing the ladder. I felt a hand grab mine as my breathing became shakier. The ladder officially collapsed and the only thing keeping me from the ground was Su-Hyeok's hand. "Don't let go! I've got you okay?"

I looked up horrified and Su-Hyeoks face mirrored mine. I had nothing to grab onto and my hand started to slip from his.

"Hold on a little more okay?" He said panicking. "I'll pull you up I promise! Guys help me!"

I felt more force pull me up but it made my hand slip more. His eyes were tearing up as he looked at me. He was using both of his hands but they kept slipping. I looked down and saw that the zombies walked away from where they just were. I could make a run for it and find someplace to find safety.

"I'm sorry" I whispered as my hand slipped from his.

I fell to the ground and quickly got up running for my life.

"Y/n!" He yelled trying to get down the building but his friends pulled him back.

His scream drew all of the zombies to that building point but I still had to close calls. I never looked back as I kept running forward. I looked at the big tree coming up close that led to a classroom window.

"Here I go" I whispered and did my best to climb the tree I yelped as I saw my foot being grabbed at.

I stomped on it with my other foot holding the tree branch for my life. Once the hand let go I made it to the top. The branches kept creaking as I slowly made it to what looked like the music room window. I looked through the window and saw the coast was clear. I carefully opened the window and climbed in. I sighed in relief until I heard the piano go off. I looked over and saw a girl trapped underneath the piano. I slowly moved back until I fell out of the classroom. I closed the door and noticed that she wasn't going to escape from under the heavy object. I sighed quietly sitting against the wall closest to the window. Fear finally had time to take over as I sat and watched what used to be my classmates bang against the window of the classroom or walk away bloodied with no emotions. I dug my head into my knees crying softly. A day passed by and my head hurt from crying all night and not sleeping. I was too scared to close my eyes just in case a zombie came in. The hallway silence was filled with a bunch of noises and I quickly got up. Before I could do anything the door opened and shut as I started to climb out of the window.

"Y/n?" I heard a familiar voice say. I turned around and saw a person holding a guitar in a bloody uniform.

"Cheong-San," I said stepping down from the window. "You're alive"

"I thought you died," He said as we whispered back and forth looking at the door in front of us.

"Is Su-Hyeok okay?" I said urgently.

"He's safe, don't worry," He said putting his hand on my shoulder.

"Thank fuck" I whispered.

"Stay back," He said referring to the girl under the piano.

"Don't worry she hasn't moved since yesterday."

He just nodded a few minutes later we heard voices come from the intercom. I flinched and hid behind Cheong-San as the Zombies ran to the speakers.

"Cheong-San are you there?" Dae-Su said over the intercom.

"Cheong-San do you hear us?" My heart rate spiked hearing Su-Hyeok's voice over the speakers.

"Told you," Cheong-San said rubbing my back.

"It's me Su-Hyeok. We'll come to you so stay put got it?"

"Don't come here Moron, you can't come here" Cheong-San said walking to the speaker as if it actually does something.

"Shh," I said and continued to listen to what he was saying.

Su-Hyeok kept reassuring Cheong-San they were coming but little did they know it took my whole power to get him to shut up to listen to the announcement.

"And Y/n you better be safe okay? I still have to get that yes from you so I can see you perform."

I nodded to myself but saw Cheong-San planning his escape. I grabbed his hand and pulled him away from the window. "Stop it!"

He was about to fight back till On-Jo came over the speaker.

"Cheong-San please stay still," On-Jo said making him stop fighting my grasp to leave. "I know you never listen to me but listen just this once"

This took Cheong-San out of his dazed state and sat on a desk his head in his hands.

"They'll be fine," I said sitting across from him. "Believe in them okay?"

"Yeah...."

This time music did blare in the speakers as I watched the zombies run to either side of the hallway. My leg bounced anxiously waiting to see if anyone ends up coming to get us. After what felt like forever we heard footsteps coming from the hallway and the door opening. I looked up and saw a group of people. Dae-Su went up and hugged Cheong-San and On-Jo looked over.

"Y/n?" Hyo-Ryung said. "I did see you on the drone camera"

"Drone camera?" I asked confused.

"Never mind that I'm glad your alive" She smiled.

"Where's Su-Hyeok?" I asked as On-Jo hugged me I started to struggle in her grasp trying to leave. "Where is he?"

"He was behind us," Dae-Su said.

Suddenly the door started to bang frantically. There was a voice telling us to let them in. Cheong-San hesitantly opened the door as Nam-Ra and Su-Hyeok ran in. I made eye contact with Su-Hyeok who ran up and hugged me.

"Thank god your okay," He said his voice shaky. "How did you do it, I thought I lost you"

"I thought I lost you too," I said I pulled away from the hug to look at him directly. His face was bloody and he had a bruise on his face. "What happened?"

"That's not important" He smiled gently. "What's important is that I can see you again"

"I should've told you this before but I really like you, when I was stuck in here I thought that I would never see you again and you wouldn't know my feelings. I got scared that I wouldn't be able to tell you and-" my rambling went off as I felt a pair of lips on mine.

"It's okay, I'm here" He cupped my cheek. "And I really like you too so don't scare me like that"

"I won't ever again"

"Promise?"

"I promise," I said hugging him and he let my hair. The soothing made me feel like collapsing from exhaustion but my happiness kept it away. I heard two people clapping at our confession.

"Shut up," Su-Hyeok said.

Even though this is one small moment in the hell hole that we have ahead of ourselves that I'm not sure I'm ready for it. This moment was the happiest little did I know the chaos that was just beginning.

[jackjackal]

Unpopular Opinion...

I don't hate it...but I'm not a huge fan of H2O season 3 (I might even write my own rewrite like I'm doing for HoA)...but here's why:

Bella is GREAT...but she's absolutely no Emma (and she's not supposed to be...I know!) All I'm saying is that her character is a little on the Alex from Totally Spies level (which again is not a bad thing!!) BUT Alex 100% got overshadowed by Clover and Sam...and I think that Bella's the same way in H2O. Rikki and Cleo are just a little bit more interesting character-wise (just in my opinion). Which means Bella is a lot like Sirena in the Mako Mermaids Netflix spinoff...she can sing BEAUTIFULLY, but other than the singing...she really just follows Will around the whole season like a lost little puppy (as does Sirena to David) and she doesn't do much of standing up for herself (at least in episodes 1 - 15). Even her power is kinda a reflection of her character...it's like slime...something that's cool and fun to play with, but eventually you get bored with it. What I mean by this is that she 100% was brought on board for looks (even Bella stans have to admit she has WAY more scenes in fancy dresses and bikini tops than Emma, Cleo, or Rikki) and because of this it muddied the whole theme of the show a bit by going against EVERYTHING H2O stood for (female independence and power...power not from the ability to turn heads or from their mermaid abilities, but from their own strength of character and intelligence, emotional or otherwise). In the end, Bella just does not meet the standards to replace Emma (and I don't think she was meant to...but still). Her character is just not as dynamic...and I think that's one of the things that makes me not rewatch or like S3 as much as S1-2.

They changed ALOT. I said it to one of my friends earlier...S3 is like that episode in S2 when Ash takes over and changes the cafe. It's just too much too soon. The JuiceNet becomes Rikki's, Bella replaces Emma, Will's there (we'll get to him later), Sophie's there (Neo-Charlotte who's less of a good villain), Sam's there, all of them are older by a noticable amount and Zane has a haircut like a 70-year-old, Mako's going insane with creepy tentacle creature thing, and the whole freaking theme song changes to be more fast-paced and "hip" with a lot of what sounds like to me to be autotune. Now I realize change is good and everything...but it really just makes me sad to watch the whole thing. ESPECIALLY when Lewis leaves (I think my heart was crushed and spat on). He was being all cute and romantic in this season with Cleo too :'( BUT, overall I liked a lot of the changes (Bella, as I mentioned was fine just maybe not as good as Emma was, Drummer!Lewis my heart, and I enjoyed the family antics with Sam...so I really didn't mind her being in it, it was cute that Don fell in love <3 ) Summary of this point: I don't like change and Emma was not my fav character but she was MY character (the most like me). When she left...it kinda made me think of things...like am I replaceable?? Anyways...moving on...

Will. Pretty much enough said with that. He's arrogant, too obessed with power and mermaids, and way too mean to Bella. He treats her like dirt most of the season and makes me wonder like...is Will the real villain of S3??? Also they make his character out to be like he's a merman just without the powers (with the whole free diving arc)...and it's honestly kinda like he's a Byron wannabe but also a weird Frankenhybrid of Dr. Denman, Zane, Zac (from Mako Mermaids), Erik (from Mako Mermaids), and idk now I'm just listing people. His character is just kinda strange to me because first of all where the other guys have their faults, they're also sensitive and romantic at times. Will is not. He's just kinda annoying. I even like Nate more than him lol (cause at least his character isn't two-faced like Will's...he's always been NateTM). Anyways...Will and Sophie are like the evil but not evil? dynamic disaster duo of S3. They're both just kinda not fun to watch...which brings me to Sophie.

Sophie. Again, enough said. She's a Charlotte wannabe with all her red hair, snooping problems, and obession with Will (which is kinda a little weird...but not unlike Charlotte's obession with Lewis...except they weren't brother and sister...yikes). She also presses my buttons, which, good job show writers. But it just makes it a little like this has happened before. What's new? Also makes the season a little less rewatchable.

I'm really just ranting at small details now, so I'll get to my last and ultimately largest point. Season 3 lost the magic for me. When I was rewatching for the zillionth time...I noticed this rather huge change. Seasons 1 and 2 I was MESMORIZED. The water, the ocean, the pleasing details of Emma, Cleo, and Rikki having the white, purple, and red motifs throughout, the details of small little scenes like how in the episode with Rikki's father she held a CHIPPED mug and her father held a non-chipped one like she felt her image was broken/imperfect based on their lack of money and less impressive house while the dad could care less and was honestly proud of it (wooooah, okay sorry about that, but like that scene made me sooooo happy as a writer like UGGH...writers/directors made gold with that scene). Anyways, details like this were just not there in S3 (well vitrually not there...there were some like when Sophie wore Rikki's color red to impress Zane)...almost like the whole message changed from being about struggles of being a teenager and growing up to yay mermaids!! And let's focus more on the image/humor of the show as opposed to teaching us important morals. It just...kinda lost it for me. It just was not nearly as magical as S1-2 and I'm not talking actual magic. I'm talking vibes and inner magic...and all that shiz.

Overall...I give S3 a 3.5/5 ⭐️s Decent if you want more of a H2O fanfic experience but just NOT as good as the OG mermaid trio and OG guys (Lewis, Zane, and Ash...Byron you were great too, but not as good as Ash).

Which brings me to Ash...okay, okay jk! I'm not gonna steal more of your life than I already have. But just know that if I get around to my S3 rewrite idea (which I already have the plot decided and everything) then you'll be seeing a lot more of him! Woot! Thanks for reading and putting up with me. Feel free to chat with me anytime your feelings on H2O season 3 or any topic really! I love chating with fellow obsessees!💖🧜‍♀️

[cant-get-enough-btr-forever]

"Big Time Battle of the Bands", Chapter 7: Big Time Replacement

Later that day, Big Time Rush was rehearsing at Rocque Records. It seemed to be going well. Gustavo stood sidestage while his foursome sang and danced. Next to him, Kelly nodded her head along.

But it still wasn't perfect. Their dancing was slightly off-beat, and their pitch went flat a few times. To the average person, it was hardly noticeable. To Gustavo, however...

"WHAT WAS THAT??!!"

Kendall sighed before speaking. "We're just a little nervous, okay? We don't wanna screw this up for everybody."

"Guess what? I don't care." Gustavo snapped. "The fundraiser, in case you forgot, is on Saturday. And Saturday is two days away. So you monkey dogs better get your act together, or Griffin will have all of our butts hanging on his office wall!

"Not to mention, the Palmwoods will go down in history as, 'The Hotel That Was Failed By a Sloppy Boy Band.'"

Kelly cleared her throat. "Y'know, we've been rehearsing all morning. Why don't we take a lunch break?"

Gustavo began to object, but he quailed under Kelly's glower. "Fine...lunch." he relented. The guys exhaled with relief.

The moment Gustavo and Kelly had disappeared, James straightened out his collar and flipped his bangs. "Well, I am going back to the Palmwoods to see if Pink Girl wants to share that lunch with me."

Kendall rounded on him. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but Gustavo has a point. If we wanna give the Palmwoods a good name, we've gotta be 100% into this. Now really isn't the time to be getting distracted by girls."

Logan whapped the back of James' head. "See? I told you."

James sputtered indignantly as he rubbed the stinging area. He retaliated with a shove, which Logan countered with a harder shove, which quickly snowballed into a heated tussle. Carlos could do nothing but slowly back away and watch them go at it. Kendall rubbed his forehead.

"Okay, okay! Time out!" he yelled, holding up the universal "T" gesture. When that didn't work, he signaled to Carlos, who nodded and rapped his helmet. They proceeded to tug the pair apart, dodging the flying fists and elbows.

......

Meanwhile, out in the hall, Gustavo and Kelly came face-to-face with an unexpected (and unwanted) guest.

"Gustavo! I expect that the fundraiser preparations are going smoothly," Arthur Griffin said in his smug-cheerful voice. As usual, he was accompanied by his trusty assistant, Abdul.

"Ah, uh, yes! Naturally! Rehearsals are just peachy!" Gustavo replied with as much mirth as he could muster. Kelly looked sympathetic. She knew that Griffin was the last person he wanted to deal with.

"Splendid! I thought I would drop by and tell you how pleased I am that we are staying well within the budget. Pyrotechnics, lights, speaker systems, not to mention decor...everything my team has picked out will enhance the concert quite nicely." Griffin went on.

Gustavo inwardly screamed. Obviously, this insufferable man had "dropped by" to gloat. "Well, great!" he said, plastering on a grin.

Several awkward moments passed. Kelly was the first to break the quiet. "So, is there anything else?"

Griffin seemed a bit startled, but smiled. "Oh, yes! I wanted to let you know that plans have changed slightly. A different band will be performing at the fundraiser."

Gustavo blanched. Kelly's jaw dropped. "WHAT?!" they yelled.

Griffin calmly explained, "A new group has been brought to my attention. I believe that all up-and-coming young artists deserve some recognition. Besides, the people of the Palmwoods could use some fresh new faces to represent them, don't you think?"

With that, he left them in their flabbergasted states. Just as he reached the end of the hall, he turned around. "Oh, and tell the boys 'you're welcome.' Now they have extra time to work on that album!"

Gustavo shook himself out of his stupor and furiously marched after his boss. Kelly hastened behind him.

"ExCUSE me?" Gustavo exclaimed. "So you're gonna fire us, just like that?! What, we don't even get to hear the 'fresh new faces' you've dragged in?"

"First of all, Gustavo, I did not 'drag' them in. They were dragged to me." Griffin patiently replied. "Second of all, yes. I can fire you. It's one of the many joys of having lots and lots of money. I can own anything I want, including you. I can choose anything I want.

"And if I think one of the things I own has grown old and tired, I can simply choose something else to replace it. And do you know what that gets me?"

Gustavo and Kelly stared at Griffin, mouths agape.

Griffin leaned in. "More money, Gustavo. And the cycle continues." He smiled.

After a beat, Kelly shook herself. "Okay, you skipped a part: Are you even going to let us hear the new boys?" she demanded.

Griffin and Abdul looked at each other.

......

"DOGS! We're done for the day!" Gustavo annunciated as he re-entered the rehearsal studio.

He was greeted by an interesting sight: Carlos was sitting on Logan's stomach (who was lying flat on the stage) and reading a comic, while Kendall was standing with his arms crossed next to a seated James. James' wrists were bound with a purple bandana. Logan and James were, understandably, scowling.

"You know what? I don't even wanna know." Gustavo said after some staring. "Follow me, we are going back to the Palmwoods."

"Wait, you're letting us off early?" Carlos said, eyes wide with disbelief.

"Who are you, and what have you done with the Giant Turd?" Kendall mock-exclaimed.

Gustavo managed to keep the steam from hissing out of his ears, but completely failed to keep it out of his mouth. "You know, with an attitude like that, I might just LET Griffin replace you with his new BAND!"

The four boys froze at that last word. "New band? What new band?" Kendall asked.

Kelly took one look at her beet red boss and decided to answer that one. "Griffin has recruited a new vocal group. He wants them to replace you guys at the fundraiser."

The reaction was as expected: a chorus of "what?!" and "he can't do that!" Gustavo held up his hands. "Yeah, yeah, we know. We get it. Which is why we are all heading over to the Palmwoods."

Kelly elaborated, "They're gonna debut for the residents."

James barked out a laugh. "Oh, yeah? I bet the people will know what's up. They know I'm the original Face of the Palmwoods." He did his trademark 'spirit fingers' (as best as he could with his hands tied).

Kendall smacked his chest, to which he flinched. "And by 'I'm', I mean we." From his spot on the floor, Logan rolled his eyes.

"Let's move out! I wanna see the look on Griffin's face when he realizes the egregious error he's made." Gustavo huffed before leaving.

James gave a little "ahem?" and shoved his hands at Kendall, who sighed and untied him. Logan glared at Carlos after he finally got off his stomach.

"Think it's time to lay off the corndogs, man," he grumbled, rubbing his abdomen. Carlos stuck out his tongue as they hopped off the stage.

[ieatsheartsfromthedead]

Loving Tony

summary- y/n trying to resist the one and only tony montana/ scarface

warning- oral, sex, cursing

Y/n gotten to work early having a few moments to herself, the mornings were the worst working in a restaurant it was to busy it stressed her out as she was pouring coffee she noticed two men walking in with fancy suits with gold chains making their way to the barstool where she was…

She pulled out two menus for the men she cleared her throat “Hi, welcome” She said with a smile “Let me know if you need anything” She went back into the kitchen to grab other plates of food “Ms?” I heard a man say with a thick accent She quickly made her to the front counter passing the food to the other waiter “Hi, what can get for you ?” She said “A cup of coffee please” One of the men said “What about you?” I asked the other one he had a unique scar of his face it really brought out his features “The same as him” He said She poured them a coffee passing it to them she noticed how they both were whispering things to each other she also noticed the way the one with scar looked at her… She came back 20 minutes later to see if they wanted to eat anything “What else can I get for you guys?” She asked “Two grilled cheeses” The one said She made her way to the back making her famous grilled cheeses

Tony had thought the waitress was pretty sexy and he wanted a taste “Aye man, I’m gonna bone that pretty waitress” He told Manny his best friend “Nah man you don’t gotta chance” He said laughing “Ah don’t be a hater” Tony said with a grin, The waitress had came back with the grilled cheeses “Enjoy” She said as she walked away Tony looked at her ass that looked perfect through those blue tight jeans she had one he also noticed her eyes the way her nose scrunched up when she talked, After the two boys ate Tony pulled out his wallet placing a 100 dollar bill when the waitress came back she was more then shocked “That’s for you” Tony spoke confidently “Wow um- thank you” She said with a smile “I was wondering if I could take you out sometime” He also added she stood for a moment “How about tonight” She said he looked at her “Sounds good to me baby, write your address down and along with your number I’ll come pick you up” He said

Y/n was flabbergasted the whole day thinking of the famous scarface she heard rumors about him being the biggest drug lord in Florida but that didn’t scary her one bit.

Y/n got off work heading to her house preparing for tonight she didn’t know what to expect going on a date with a dude she heard so much about she didn’t mind it tho he seemed very caring or so she thought? The phone had rung as she gotten out the shower wrapping herself in it “Hello” she spoke “You ready for our date” He spoke with a low tone She hesitated at first “I’m getting ready, when will you be here?” She asked “in a hour be outside and wear something sexy” The thick accent came again she gotten chills to the tip of her toes

“Okay, I will” she said thinking of what to wear “See you soon” the line had ended only to find her breathless of the fact that she is going on a date with the so called drug lord she wanted to know more about him somehow something was calling her to him she couldn’t put the pen to it yet, She put on the tightest dress she could find hugging her curves and ass along with her perky tits she applied her makeup not to much she did her lips as well looking into the mirror once again she looked really beautiful jaw dropping all most she added her new lacey heels along with it then phone went off again “I’m outside” He said “Okay, coming” she spoke softly she ended the line turning off the lights in her home now walking outside to see the newest Porsche her jaw was to the floor

Tony watched her walk to his car he saw how the dress she had on fit her body just right he wanted to do two things tonight fuck her well and make her his wife she gotten in the car with a smile “Hi Tony” she said with seductive tone

“Hi y/n” he spoke back, Tony and Y/n went to a fancy restaurant he told her that she could get anything she could want and she did Tony watched her closely and listened as she talked about her life and what not he didn’t just wanna fuck her by the end of the night he wanted to understand her and give her the life she deserves and needs “Thank you for tonight I had a wonderful time” She spoke as he opened the car door “It’s no problem baby” he spoke as he gotten in the car He could tell the vibe had changed the look in her eyes she gave him sending him into a spiral of feelings he wasn’t sure he could handle or maybe it was the coke he hammed down fuck he thought he hoped and prayed she was the one the one he could put that diamond ring on

Y/n looked at Tony she wanted him to know she was ready for anything he wanted her to do “Wanna go back to my place?” He asked “Yes” Tony proceeded to drive to his place the Montana estate he had brought a month ago They pulled in the driveway y/n was fascinated by the estate “You like what you see?” Tony asked “Yes its beautiful” She replied, Tony parked the car

Y/n and Tony had made their way into his mansion he offered her some wine, they both eased their way into his bedroom y/n she noticed the bathtub “I love the bathtub” She said “Wanna go in it ?” He asked her she nods “I wanna see you strip baby” He told her she felt her cheeks turn red “Don’t get shy baby I won’t bite unless you want me to” He said seductively she obeyed slowly stripping in front of Tony “Slower baby” She went slower for him taking her dressed off. Tony looked at y/n with such admiration he loved the way her body looked he wonder how’d she feel under him making love, his cock grew harder by the minute y/n was now in her panties and bra “Come here” Tony said she made her way in front of him looking at him innocently “On your knees” She gotten on her knees she felt his thumb rubbing over her lips circling them as she looked up at him with such lust she could tell he liked it "I hope you are ready for me" Tony said unbuckling his pants letting his big cock spring free Y/n couldn't wait to have him in her mouth feeling her throat using her like she wanted him to "I'm ready" She said giving him a grin he nod she opened her mouth wide just for him, he forced his meaty cock in her mouth

Y/n gagged on his cock her eyes watering “Look at me baby” He said She looked up him while gagging on his cock “Good girl such a good girl” He moaned she tried her best to fit him all in her mouth “Oh baby don’t make me cum already” Tony states she used both hands one playing with those big balls of his one stroking his long cock “Fuck baby” The spit traveling down her mouth from her hands was so hot to Tony he tried his best not to cum yet, Luckily Y/n gotten a taste of his bittersweet cum “Get up” He said She gotten up from her knees wiping the spit from her lips looking at her art work Tony pulled her to the bed pushing her on the bed softly “Open your legs from me” He said she did as she was told he looked at the thong she had on “So pretty” He hummed he traced over her thong finding the spot to get her begging for him “Don’t tease Tony” She said he couldn’t help but smile he gotten on his knees now pulling down her thong looking at her pretty cunt she soaked through her panties "Tony" She groans waiting for him to start the fun "Tell me what you want" He said looking at her "I want you to taste me" She said looking down at him and with that he ran his fingers along her wet folds causing her to groan he knew how to tease a women great but he wanted to give Y/n everything he licked her cunt tasting her sweet jucies he loved it already he stuck his tongue inside getting the feeling of her cunt he noticed how wet she was getting him Y/n watched Tony eat her cunt she loved how he felt inside of her, she grabbed his hair pushing him closer and closer to her cunt "I want more please" She said moaned out "Please" She said Tony knew she wanted his cock and he was gonna give it to her "Okay baby" He gotten up from his knees now hovering over her placing a few kisses on her soft lips. Tony gotten to the part were Y/n wanted the most he lined up his entrance pushing his cock inside feeling her “Oh fuckk” She moans out “Tony” she whines he fucked her slow letting her get use to the feeling hearing how wet her cunt was for him “I wanna make you mine” He moan slamming his hips in his nearly causing her to combust “Tonyy” she screams he fucked her rough playing with swollen clit she could barely hold on till Tony lifted her up, Her face was in the pillows he fucked her deep hitting places she didn’t know she had “Baby, I’m close” She whimpered, Tony went fasting panting she loved the way he made her feel she wanted this to last forever,Her knees were weak she soon felt the pressure the knot in her stomach “I’m gonna- cum- cum” she came all over Tony’s cock soon after he came right behind her the two were out of breath panting for air till he spoke up “I had a good time tonight” He said giving Y/n a kiss pulling the covers of them “Me to” She said pulling him closer to her “I wanna marry you someday” Tony said with a grin “Hopefully” She said giving him a peak on the lips.

[heymickyursofine]

JUST KEEP SWIMMING.

— CHAPTER 6.

Anastasia handed Mac the spear gun, the two were on the stern with Jonas who was getting clipped in.

"This tracker rifle only had a 100-foot range."

"100 feet?" Jonas asked, bewildered. "Get really close before you shoot." Ana nodded at him.

"Great." He snatched the gun out of Mac's hands.

"If you want me to go instead, I will." Ana was shocked at Mac's statement.

"I got this, Mac."

"Okay, good, 'cause I was lying." Jonas chuckled. "Be safe." "Yeah, thanks, pal." Jonas turned to look at Suyin, "I hope you're right about this."

"Me too." With that, he dove into the water. Jonas swam slowly while Doctor Heller fed him more line.

"I'm an idiot," Jonas spoke over comms.

He swam a bit further, "I am proceeding to the enormous killer Shark."

"Yeah, we got you, Jonas." Anastasia eagerly watched on, worried for Jonas.

"Sharks are attracted to panic motion. Keep it nice and smooth."

Easier said than done.

"It's all gonna be fine." Jonas tried to reassure himself once the Dorsal fin of the Meg poked out of the water. He then started singing the Just Keep Swimming tune from Finding Nemo and Ana had to bite back a laugh.

"Oh, boy, it's going under." Morris pointed out, and the nerves were running higher than ever. Jonas was barely visible, but it looked as if he was close to the Megalodon.

"Mac, tracker is live!" Jaxx yelled out minutes later.

"Great! Reel him in, DJ." The line started to come in.

"Stop! Stop!" DJ stopped per Suyin's pleas. "No vibration!"

Anastasia looked back out to the sea, the Meg did look more aggressive as it swam forward, it caused a wake to appear at both its sides. "Oh, shit. I'm in trouble."

"Jonas, it's coming at you."

"You think I didn't notice?!" He yelled at Jaxx, her statement was obvious.

"Start the boat! Start the boat!" Jonas was easier to see due to his frantic swimming.

"Pull him in!" Suyin and Ana said the same thing, although Ana wasn't as calm as Suyin. Jonas was coming to the boat quickly but the Meg was right on his tail, it was too close. Everyone was yelling at Jonas, telling him to hurry.

Jonas went under for briefly and then flew up into Ana, The Wall, and Heller, the Meg was right behind him, mouth open ready to eat. The three caught him and he slipped out of their grasp onto the platform, landing harshly. They kneeled down to Jonas, looking over him.

"Are you alright?" Ana quickly asked, he only nodded, out of breath. "You might be a son of a bitch, but you're sure as hell no coward. Good job." Heller patted Jonas on the chest, while The Wall brought him into a handshake, Ana let out a sigh of relief, giving into the laughter everyone else was sharing.

-

"I prepared the spearheads to inject etorphine." Ana walked over to Dr. Heller, handing him the bottle. "A Killer Whale is knocked out with 10 CCs. Dead with 20. What do you think?" Doctor Zhang asked Doctor Heller.

"I think we use the whole damn bottle."

Suyin got suited up, her father and Ana helping in any way possible. After the cage was lowered and Doctor Zhang had a short conversation with Suyin Ana started to worry.

"I'll be okay you know."

"I know. It's just... I know."

She didn't really want to divulge into a whole speech about how she couldn't lose her best friend. "Please be careful." She wrapped Suyin into a hug, as best as she could with the large tank on Suyin's back.

"I will," Suyin rested her cheek on Anastasia's shoulder, the two had always been touchy with each other, showing their affection mostly by touch.

"I love you," Ana smiled at Suyin once she pulled back. "I love you too," Suyin returned the phrase. Ana got up and busied herself with assisting Doctor Zhang.

-

She stood between Jonas and Mac, watching down on Suyin as Heller shut the cage lid. Jonas turned the latch and Suyin gave a salute, he patted the cage two times in return and down she went.

Chum was thrown in around Suyin, and the waiting game began.

A gasp was heard from Suyin. "What's happening down there? You okay?" Mac asked. "Yeah. I'm okay. Just some teeny, tiny, eight-foot Sharks." Ana rolled her eyes at the use of "tiny" being a description of eight-foot Sharks.

"Here we go."

It was showtime.

"We've got her attention," Jaxx announced. The Shark was pinged on the map, going right towards Suyin. "Suyin, it's on its way," Mac spoke through comms as he walked away.

"50 meters!" Jaxx informed him.

"50 meters." He relayed.

The meters started decreasing, 30 and then quickly 10. The moment the Meg was on Suyin she let out a yelp. "Okay. Wow. I'm going to try to hit it in the eye. Damn it."

It was hard not knowing what was going on down there.

Suyin yelled again and the line for the cage started rolling, the whole rig turned to the side.

The boat abruptly got pulled backward, water came up onto the deck, and Ana held onto the table to not lose her footing.

"Oh sh-" The rod was pulled almost all the way out of the platform, narrowly missing DJ and Heller, who tackled DJ to the ground.

"Yes! The poison is in."

"Okay, Suyin, hang in there."

She let out a grunt, "I'm trapped! I'm in its mouth!"

"That cage will not break." Jaxx told her, "That's the problem! The cage is being swallowed!"

It seemed as if no one knew what to do but Jonas, who went flying off the back end of the boat with an oxygen tank.

Ana ran over. "Hell yeah!" She glared at Morris.

"Not this again." "Oh, man. Oh, man." The cage line was getting dragged again, causing the boat to turn in the same direction.

The noise of the line snapping made Ana look over and see the rod knock Jaxx into the water. "Jaxx!" She ran over to the cabinet with all of the equipment to look for a ladder, fishing through the gear.

Morris came up behind her, "Do you have a ladder here or something?"

"I'm looking for one, help me," He started looking through the other cabinets.

"New problem. My mask is broken. I'm losing air." She heard Suyin over comms, feeling her heart shatter. Suyin had been too close to death too many times, this one felt more serious.

She pulled the earpiece from her ear and placed it on the floor next to her. "Here!" She turned around at Morris' voice and the two ran over to the ride of the boat.

"Help!" Jaxx screamed right as Morris threw the ladder over the edge, Ana and Morris held each side steady, watching the Meg come up on Jaxx.

"Hurry, Jaxx!"

"Come on, Jaxx!"

Morris and Anastasia grabbed onto her right before the Meg crashed into the spot she was in only a few seconds earlier.

"Thank you," "You're welcome." The two replied. Ana felt like her heart would burst out of her chest any second.

"Jonas, the crane's in the water!" She snapped her head towards the spot where the crane should have been at DJ's words. "It's gonna pull her to the bottom! Hurry!" She ran over to DJ.

"Swing the second crane over." The Wall commanded. Ana helped DJ do exactly that.

"We're gonna set a trap. Guys, I need some bait." Doctor Heller threw in a big chunk of chum, and moments later the Meg swam right for it.

"Come on. Got him!" The Wall was mistakenly still holding onto the line which caused him to be yanked into the water.

He resurfaced, with the crew all yelling at him.

The line attached to the Megalodon that was once jerking forward started to slow until there was no movement.

TABLE OF CONTENTS. PREVIOUS<<. CHAPTER 7.

READ ON WATTPAD: controversiallyoungf

[archivxx]

✯[0.06]✯

Previous || Next

[0.06-extra]

Note: a conversation with Clyde Donovan will become 100% more awkward after the word “sex” is uttered by me.

Three days later you found yourself stood in front of Clyde’s office.

You’d never been there before, but you had no problem finding it. The staff scurrying out of it with misty eyes and a terrified expression was a dead give away. Not to mention that Clyde’s was the only one in the hallway completely devode of pictures of kids, pets or significant others. Not even a copy of his album cover with the hit song that had won him a Grammy. You knew about all the awards he’d won from a quick google search you’d done the previous day. Just dark brown wood with a metal plaque that read; Clyde Donovan

You had felt a bit like a creep the night before, scrolling through his Wikipedia page and going through as much information you could find out about him. Unlucky for you, he was reserved and didn’t let the press know much about him. Still you’d quashed yourself the feelings, telling yourself that a thorough background check could be considered mandatory before embarking on a fake-dating relationship.

You took a deep breath before knocking and then another between Clyde’s “Come in” and the moment you finally managed to forced yourself to open the door. When you entered the offices he didn’t immediately look up and continued to type on his PC. “My office hours were over five minutes ago, so—”

“It’s me.”

His hands halted, hovering and inch or so above the keyboards then he turned his chair towards you. “Y/N.”

There was something about the way he talked. Maybe it was an accent, maybe it was just the quality of his voice. You didn’t quite know what, but it’s was there, in the way he said your name. Precise. Careful. Feel. Unlike anyone else. Familiar—impossibly so.

“What did you say to her?” You asked, trying not to care about how Clyde Donovan spoke. “The woman who ran out crying.”

It took him a moment to remember that less than sixty seconds ago there had been someone in the office—someone whom he clearly made cry. “I just gave her feedback on something she wrote.”

You nodded, silently thanking all the gods you were not a member of his staff team and never would be, and studied your surroundings.

He had a corner office, of course. Two windows that together must total who knows how many square metered of glass, and so much light, just standing in the middle of the room would cure twenty people’s seasonal depression. It made sense. With all the money he brought in, along with the prestige, that he’d be given a nice space. You on the other hand, didn’t even have your own office or filming booth, you just went where you were told and nine times out of ten the booths would smell of sweat and the offices would be with other people you didn’t know.

“I was going to email you. I talked to my publicity manager.” Clyde told you, and you looked back at him.

He was gesturing to the chair in front of his desk. You pulled it back and took a seat.

“About you.”

“Oh.” You stomach dropped. You’d much rather his publicity manager didn’t know about your existence. Then again, you’d also rather not be in this rooms with Clyde Donovan, have to go to shows, have climate change be a thing. And yet.

“Well, about us,” he amended. “And social media regulations.”

“What did they say?”

“There’s nothing against us dating and we are free to keep it a secret. Unless of course it’s gets out then we don’t have a choice.”

A mix of panic and relief flooded through you.

“However there are some issues to consider. Any of the members of staff in this building could sell us out. Equally, if we get spotted, press may sell us out, which means we simply have to be cautious.”

You nodded. “Fair enough.”

“And I absolutely cannot collaborate with you until this is over.”

You huffed put a laugh. “That won’t be an issue. I wasn’t planning on asking you to collaborate with my band anyway.”

He narrowed his eyes. “Why not? Your band does the same music as I do.”

“Yeah, alternative.”

“Then we would collaborate perfectly.”

“Yeah we may, but we don’t plan on collaborating any time soon. Plus, there are millions of people who do alternative music, and if we were going collaborate, I’d argue against it being with you. I’d like to finish the song ideally without crying in the bathroom after every meeting.”

He glared at you.

You shrugged. “No offence. I’m a simple girl, with simple needs.”

To that he lowered his gaze onto the feast but not before you could we the corners f his mouth twitch. When he looked up again, his expression was serious. “So, have you decided?”

You pressed your lips together as he watched you calmly. You took a deep breath before saying, “Yes. Yes I…I want to do it. It’s a good idea actually.”

For so many reasons. It would get Nichole and Tolkien off your back, but also…also everyone else. It was as if since the rumour had begun to spread, people had been too intimidated by you to give you the usual shit. The staff had quit trying switch the bands nice 2pm sessions with their nasty, horrible, life-sucking 8pm ones. People had stopped cutting in front of you at the coffee shop next door. And two different staff members had been trying to get ahold of you to potential work under your band too as well. It felt a little unfair to exploit this hugged misunderstanding, but this was lawless territory and your life had been nothing but miserable for the past two years. You had learnt to get away with whatever you could. And if some—okay most staff looked at you suspiciously because you were dating Clyde Donovan so be it. You friends seemed to be largely fine with this, if a little bemused.

Except for Kyle. He’d been subbing you like you had the pox for three solid days. But Kyle was Kyle—he’d come around.

“Very well then.” He we completely expressionless—almost too expressionless.

Like it was no big deal and he didn’t care either way; like if you’d said no, it wouldn’t have. Hanged a thing for him.

“Though, I’ve been thinking about this a lot.”

He waited for you to continue.

“And I think that I would be best if we lay don’t some ground rules, before starting.”

“Ground rules?”

“Yes. You know. What are we allowed and both allowed to do. What we can expect from this arrangement. I think that pretty standard protocol, before embarking on a fake-dating relationship.”

He tilted his head. “Standard protocol?”

“Yup.”

“How many times have you done this?”

“Zero. But I’m familiar with the trope.”

“The…what?” He blinked at you, confused.

You ignored him. “Okay.” You inhaled deeply and lifted you index finger. “First of all, this should be a strictly in the work place agreement. Not that I think you’d want to meet me out of work but I’m worried about the press. And just incase you were planning to kill two birds with one stone and being home a date for Christmas—”

“I wasn’t.”

“Huh?”

“I wasn’t planning to ask you to celebrate Christmas with me. But also my family don’t really celebrate.”

“Oh.” You pondered it for a moment. “That’s something a fake girlfriend should probably know.”

The ghost of a smile appeared on his mouth, but he said nothing.

“Okay. Second rule. Actually it could be interpreted as an extension of the first rule. But—” You bit into your lip, willing yourself to bring it up—“no sex.”

For several moments he simply didn’t move. Not even a millimetre. Then his lips parted, but no sound came out, and that’s when you realised you had just rendered Clyde Donovan speechless. Which would have been funny any other day, but the fact that he seemed dumbfounded by you not wanting to include sex in your fake-dating relationship made your stomach sink.

Had he assumed you would? Was it something you’d said? Should you explain you’d had very little sex in your life? That for years you’d wondered whether you were asexual and you had only recently realised you might be able to experience sexual attraction, but only with people you trusted deeply? That if for some inexplicable reason Clyde wanted to have sex with you, you were going to be able to go through with it?

“Listen”— you made to stand from the chair, panic rising in your throat—“I’m sorry, big if one of the reasons you offered to fake-date is that your thought we would—”

“No.” The word half exploded out of him. He looked genuinely appalled. “I’m shocked that you’d even feel the need to bring it up.”

“Oh.” Your cheeks hearing at the indignation in his voice. Right. Of course he didn’t expect that. Or even want that, with you. Look at him—why would he? “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to assume—”

“No, it makes sense to be up-front. I was just surprised.”

“I know.” You nodded. Honestly, you were a little surprised too. That you were sitting in Clyde Donovan’s office, talking about sex—not only the meiosis kind of sex, but potential sexual intercourse between the two of you. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to make things weird.”

“It’s okay. This whole thing is weird.” The silence between you stretched, and you noticed that he was blushing faintly. Just a dust of red, but he looked so…you couldn’t stop staring.

“No sex,” he confirmed with a nod.

You had to clear your throat to shake yourself out of inspecting the shape and colour of his cheekbones.

“No sex.” You repeated. “Okay. Third. It’s not really a rule, but here goes: I won’t date anyone else. As in real dating. It would be messy and complicated and everyone and…” You hesitated. Should you tell him? Was it too much information? Did he need to know? Oh, well. Why not, at this point? It wasn’t like you hadn’t kissed the man, or brought up sec in his place of work. “I don’t date, anyway. Tolkien was an exception. I’ve never…I’ve never dating seriously before, and it’s probably for the best. This job is stressful enough, and I haven’t friends, and my music, and honestly there’s better things to use my time for.” The last few words came out like more defensively than you’d intended.

Clyde simply stared, saying nothing.

“But you can, of course,” you added hastily. “Thought I’d appreciate if you could avoid telling people in the—well anyone—just so I don’t look like and idiot and you don’t look like your cheating on me and rumours don’t balloon out of control. It would benefit you, too, since you’re trying to look like you’re in a committed relationship—”

“I won’t.”

“Okay. Great. Thanks. I know lying by omission can be a pain, but—”

“I mean, I won’t date someone else.”

There was a certainty, a finality in his tone that took you by surprise. You could only nod even though you wanted to protest that he couldn’t possibly know, even thought a million questions surfaced in your mind. Ninety-nine percent of them were inappropriate and not your business, so you shooed them away.

“Okay. Fourth. We obviously can’t keep on doing this forever, so we should give ourselves a deadline.”

He pressed his lips together. “When would that be?”

“Im not sure. A month or so would probably be enough to convince Nichole that I’m firmly over Tolkien. But it might not be enough on you end, so…you tell me.”

He mulled it. Then nodded once. “May twenty-ninth.”

It was a little over a month from now. But also… “that’s a weirdly specific date.” You racked your head, trying to figure out why it could be meaningful. The only thing that came to mind was that you’d be in Boston that week for a charity show.

“It’s the day after my contract is reviewed. They will be deciding whether they are going to renew it or terminate it.”

“I see. We’ll, then, let’s agree that in September twenty-ninth we part ways. I’ll tell Nichole that our breakup was amicable but that I’m a little sad about it because I still have a bit of a crush on you.” You grinned at him. “Just so she won’t suspect that I’m still hung up in Tolkien. Okay.” You took a deep breath. “Fifth and last.”

This was the tricky one. The one you were afraid he would object to. You noticed that you were wringing your hands and placed them firmly in your lap.

“For this to work we should probably…do things together. Every once in a while?”

“Things?”

“Things. Stuff.”

“Stuff,” he repeated dubiously.

“Yep. Stuff. What do you do for fun?” He was probably into something atrocious, like cow-tipping excursions or Japanese beetle fighting. Maybe he collected porcelain dolls. Maybe he was an avid geocacher. Maybe he frequented vaping conventions. Oh God.

“Fun?” He repeated, like he’s never heard the word before.

“Yeah. What do you do when you’re not at work.”

The length of the time that passed between your question and his answer was alarming. “Sometimes I work at home, too. And I work out. And I sleep.”

You had to actively stop yourself from face-palming. “Um, great. Anything else?”

“What do you do for fun?” He asked, somewhat defensively.

“Plenty of things. I…” Go to the movies. Thought you hadn’t been since the last time Kyle had dragged you. Play board games. But every single one of your friends was too busy lately so not that, either. You’d participated in a volleyball tournament, but it had been over a year ago.

“Um. I work out?” You would have loved to wipe that sumg expression off his face. So much. “Whatever. We should do something together on a regular basis. I don’t know, maybe get coffee? Like, once a week? Just for ten minutes at a place where people, not the press but people we know, could easily see us. I know it sounds annoying and a waste of time, but it’ll be super short, and it would makes the fake dating more credible, and—”

“Sure.”

Oh.

You thought it would take more convincing. A lot more. Then again, this was in his interest too. He needed his contractors to believe in their relationship if he was to cajole them into renewing his contract.

“Okay. Um..” you forced yourself to stop wondering why he was being so accommodating and tried to visualise your schedule. “How about Thursday?”

He angled his chair to face his computer and pulled up a calendar app. It was so fully of colourful boxes and your felt a surge of vicarious anxiety.

“It works before eleven a.m. and after seven p.m.”

“Ten?”

He turned back to you. “Ten’s good.”

“Okay.” You waited for him to type it in, but he made no move to. “Aren’t you going to add it to your calendar?”

“I’ll remember.” He told you evenly.

“Okay, then.” You made and effort to smile, and it felt relatively sincere. Way more sincere than any smile you’d ever thought you’d been able to muster in Clyde Donovan’s presence. “Great. Fake-dating Thursday it is.”

A line appeared between his eyebrows, “why do you keep saying that?”

“Saying what?”

“‘Fake dating.’ like it’s a thing.”

“Because it is. Do you not watch rom-coms?”

He stared at you with a puzzled expression, until you cleared your throat and looked down at your knees. “Right.” God, you had nothing in common. You’d never find anything to talk about. Your ten minute coffee-breaks we’re going to be the most painful, awkward parts of your already painful, awkward weeks.

But Nichole was going to have her beautiful love story, and you wouldn’t have to wait for ages to finally do a Cancer Awareness Campaign. That was all that mattered.

You stood and thrust your hand out to him, figuring that every fake-dating arrangement deserved at lead a handshake. Clyde studied it hesitantly for a couple seconds. Then he stood, clapped your fingers. He stared at your joined hands before meeting your eyes. And you ordered yourself not to notice the head of his skin, or how tall he was, or…anything else about him. When he finally let go, you had to make a conscious effort not to inspect your hand.

Had he done something to you? It sure felt like it. Your flesh was tingling.

“When do you want to start?”

“How about next week?” It was Friday. Which meant that you had fewer days than seven to psychologically prepare for the experience of getting coffee with Clyde Donovan. You knew that you could do this—if you had worked your way up to being in a band and kicking your stage fright in the ass, you could do anything, or as good as—but it still seemed like a horrible idea.

“Sounds good.”

It was happening. Oh God. “Let’s meet in the downstairs coffee shop. It’s where most of the staff and well—anyone who comes here at all—goes to get coffee. Someone’s bound to spot us.” You headed for the door, pausing to glance back at Clyde. “I guess I’ll see you for fake-dating Thursday, then?”

He was still standing behind his desk, arms crossed in his chest. Looking at you. Looking entirely less irritated by this mess than you’d ever had expecting. Looking…nice. “See you, Y/N.”

Masterlist

[0.06-extra]

Taglist: @h3artilly @carinaryen @bootsieboo @southparktegreity

(Taglist is still open)

[mxndxlorixnn]

Chipped

Warnings

I'm just gonna say this now it's the 100 so technically everything you see in here will have probably happened in the show. But

Tw:blood,Self harm,Attempted suicide. (Just like Raven did well chipped in the episode..) 

Y/N's POV.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had been chipped. I had no say if I wanted it or not they forced me to have it. Me and Raven have been best friends since we were born so we did everything together well not everything you get what I mean.

Raven had an idea to fry the chip so of course I had to get in on this. A.L.I.E found out and had to get in the way. She made Raven go through a bunch of pain and for me I had to watch well being held down so I couldn't do anything. I begged and begged for them to stop they did nothing. They only said it would stop if we fully submitted. I said I fully submit then Raven did.

Y/N's POV-well fully chipped-

Sinclaire, Clarke, Octavia, Monty, Jasper, Miller and Bellamy had brought us to this place, I couldn't figure out where we were. Me and Raven needed to get a location for A.L.I.E  so Jaha and the rest of them could come and save us.

It was going to be a bit more difficult because we are tied up so we couldn't leave or anything. Bellamy was on watch, I like him a little bit but of course he had to like Clarke. Well I didn't know that for sure but it sure as hell seemed like it.

I knew A.L.I.E was going to use to get Bellamy to tell us where we were or something and I had no choice I couldn't stop any words that came out of my mouth.

A.L.I.E had encouraged me and Raven to untie the rope with our teeth and it worked.

I had to do it quietly but I found a piece of glass and I held it to my wrist although it really wasn't me it was A.L.I.E, "Why her, why her, why her, why her," I repeated over and over.

Bellamy had turned around. he looked at me then he looked at the glass to my wrists. "Y/n what are you doing and most importantly why are you doing this." he said taking a step closer and something must have clicked because he must have remembered I had been chipped.

"you know they were right, it does take the pain away. I couldn't take it you and Clarke. when really both you and I know that I like you, but of course, you had to choose her I mean she's pretty and funny and cool and knows how to do everything." I technically yelled. "y/n what are you talking about" he kept on taking a step closer.

A.L.I.E noticed it then took over with her voice. "I wouldn't move if i was you. you don't want poor y/n to die from blood loss do you" she had told Bellamy from my body. then next thing I know I have blood pouring from both of my wrists and Bellamy yelling for the others.

Bellamy had ripped my shirt and used it to help the blood and stuff so I didn't die. after a bit Clarke stitched me up then they tied me to the bed. I needed to know where I am so Allie can come save me and raven. after a little bit, they were all in the room apparently they found a way to fry the chip or something. both me and Raven know that we couldn't let that happen. Raven knew to let me handle it so I started to bang my head extremely hard on the backboard and then I heard Bellamy say, "she's trying to kill herself, we can't let her die. I love her".

he held me down to stop me from moving. But I didn't stop moving all I needed was to find out where me and Raven are. then I blacked out and so did Raven.

Y/n's Pov-back to normal-

After I woke up Bellamy wasn't there. walked out and saw the 2 hugging yes Clarke and Bellamy. no one knew that I was awake. so I just stormed out and sat somewhere random outside. A few minutes later Bellamy came out I could tell he was mad about something.

"what the hell? you just wake up and you don't bother to say hi or talk to any of us" he said kinda yelling.  "you should go back to your girlfriend" I said kinda with tears in my eyes but not letting them slip. "y/n what are you talking about" he stood me up and looked me right in the eyes. "you and Clarke, A.L.I.E should have just killed me when she had the chance" I said that last part a little more quietly. "OH my gosh shut up" he then pulled me in and kissed me.

i melted into the kiss and immediately kissed back.

Kinda lame and cringy but oh well-Urfsvglader

If you have any requests please feel free to comment or message me

[nicad13]

Crossroads: Chapter 3

The Connection

Summary: Because Din and Rayne deserve a little happiness.

Notes: Here come the R-rated bits.

Lovely illustration by @catstanbulite.

As I think back on this chapter, I feel like I should make it clear that Rayne's perception of the Jedi is not my own. She's looking back on her experiences through the lens of abandonment and the persecution that followed. She'll continue to do that throughout this story, but I'm thinking of addressing it in a later one.

Canon-compliant through Season 1, alt version of Season 2. Posting some old fic in the hopes of some more comments & inspiration to push me to finish the sequel by the end of Season 3. AO3 link in the Source at the bottom.

Tags/Warnings: Found Family, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Helmet rules, Grief/Mourning, Religious Conflict, Angst, Sexual Situations, Infertility

---

I am not your señorita I am not from your tribe If you want inside her well Boy you better make her raspberry swirl

Tori Amos, Raspberry Swirl

---

The morning sun crept over the hangar wall as Din approached the edge of the yard, jetpack in hand. He adjusted his cloak before swinging the pack over his head and sliding it into place over the armor on his back.

He stood still and closed his eyes, re-centering his balance, focusing his thoughts.

The sounds of morning were subdued, but plentiful. He heard the turn of a ratchet as Rayne opened an engine panel at the top of the Razor Crest. He heard the bleeps and blurbs of the bots as they shuttled to and fro, bringing her what she needed. He heard the soft snores of the kid as he lay napping in his crate under the belly of the ship, safely out of the way of anything Rayne might drop from the roof or anything Din himself might do in the coming moments.

His first flight on Nevarro against Gideon and the TIE fighter had been just good enough to not get himself killed, and that was about all that could be said of it. His second flight from the lava river back to the Razor Crest had been more controlled, but not altogether good. He needed more confidence with it, to learn to operate it properly. The hangar wasn’t ideal; he would’ve preferred a wide-open space, but Rayne hadn’t yet had a chance to work on their personal fob-scramblers, so he and the kid were still restricted to the hangar or the ship. The lattice protecting the hangar formed a ceiling of about 50 meters. At the very least, it would force him to stick with low-altitude practice to start.

He tapped the ignition button on his vambrace and the jetpack fired up, jerking against his shoulders first, then settling into a steady rumble. Eyes still closed, he recalled his boyhood lessons in the Rising Phoenix, early training with stripped-down jetpacks that were far less powerful and temperamental than the real thing, never getting more than three meters off the ground, but enough to get a feel for how to lift off, hover, and land on your feet instead of your head. He had proven to be far better with a rifle than a jetpack in those days, so his later training had focused on that instead, but he still remembered the basics.

Taking a deep breath and opening his eyes, he lifted off, gently, not the 100-meter straight-up shot of before. He paused at ten meters of altitude, rotated in a slow spin, then brought his hands up to initiate a forward glide. It started reasonably well, but just when he thought he had it, he shot forward, smashed into the blunted bow of the Razor Crest, then fell face-first to the ground as the jets cut out.

Rayne had been walking along the top of the port engine when the sound of Din’s collision startled her off her feet and sent her sliding butt-first down the curve of the cowling to the top of the hull. Not liking the sound of what she’d heard, she slid down the rail of the service ladder to the ground and ran to where Din lay prone, skidding to a halt beside him. “Din! Hey! You ok?”

A low groan escaped the modulator as he pulled his hands in and pushed himself over and up into a sitting position, knees pulled up, arms wrapped around his shins, head hanging. “Give me a minute.” His voice was thin.

His head pounded.

He couldn’t fill his lungs.

The ground swam before him.

His stomach lurched.

Uh oh…

Just before he could tell her to turn away so he could take the helmet off ahead of his breakfast ending up in it, he felt tiny hands press into his ribs, and the nausea fled as quickly as it had come. His chest heaved as he finally was able to pull some air in.

He turned to see the kid standing next to him, smiling, ears up and alert.

“Thanks, kiddo,” he said, dropping an arm to put it around him.

Rayne took a knee before them. “What’s up, guys?”

“Just rung my own bell.” The kid snorted as if to say, You did more than that, pal. “He put me back on an even keel. Usually that kind of thing wears him out.”

“He’s getting stronger. That’s good.” She stood up and offered him a hand. He took it, and she helped him up. Walking out to the yard a little further, she turned back and looked up to the bow of the Razor Crest, amber shades reflecting the sun. “Doesn’t look like you did any harm to your ship.” She looked back at Din and smiled. “You do know I’ll have to charge you extra for any damage you cause here that I’ll have to fix, right?”

“I understand,” his tone was light as he walked back out.

---

The rest of the day was uneventful. Rayne wrapped up the hyperdrive repairs, the kid swallowed three frogs and a wrench, and Din’s jetpack practice improved. Rayne couldn’t resist a bit of light teasing by the end of the afternoon. “Fledgling status will not excuse any broken windows.”

“Yeah?” Din shot back. “You handle a sword like a giant ten-year-old.”

“Because my training stopped when I was ten years old.”

They took the sparring sabers out again, but more for instruction, this time. He taught her a few new moves, the same ones an old friend had taught him ages ago, tricks for smaller people fighting larger ones. She was still somewhat off-balanced and clumsy, but improved despite it. She showed him how to get more power out of his swings without over-committing. They practiced, more of a dialogue, the ring of steel-on-steel coming in short, rhythmic bursts.

The kid watched them from his crate, fascinated by the choreography before him, Mythosaur pendant half-in his mouth, the silhouette of his father moving fluidly with that of his new friend against the setting sun. His father was a mix of skill and power, efficient movements graced by the billow of the cloak about his shoulders, armor glinting in the slanting light. The friend was raw power and speed, lean limbs still clad in the form-fitting clothes designed not to catch on moving parts, occasionally stumbling, but never tiring, matching his father strike for strike.

For the first time the kid could ever recall, his father was happy.

The kid decided he liked his father’s new friend. She was strong like Cara, kind like Kuiil. She let him eat frogs and gave him a huge, shiny ball. She had openly accepted his effort to heal her. Encouraged it, even. She played with him like no one else had in a long, long, time, lifting without her hands and smiling at him, like it was their own secret to share.

He wanted to stay here with her. But they never seemed to stay anywhere for very long. If they couldn’t stay, he wanted her to come with them. They brought people with them, sometimes.

Maybe they could keep this one.

---

Dinner was again delivered and consumed, and conversation turned towards the kid’s future.

“The Jedi wouldn’t be the right place for him, anyway,” Rayne said.

“No?”

They were sitting around the fire. Din with his back to the Razor Crest, facing the hangar’s exit, the kid on his left, Rayne to his right. Rayne and the kid were playing with the bearing again, tossing it back and forth, catching it not with their hands, but with the Force. Rayne held it aloft for a moment, making it rise and fall. “Extremist practices. They forced people who would otherwise have made good Jedi to the Dark Side.”

“Like what?”

“All the girls were sterilized.”

“What?”

“Sith rape just as much as anyone else, so it was a preventative measure. Still.” She paused for a moment, gazing at the bearing, then continued. “Zero-tolerance policy for intimacy. No sex. Nothing beyond platonic relationships. It was stupid. The Force burns. You’re supposed to direct all that energy into becoming more skilled, becoming a better warrior. It’s banthashit. Sometimes you just need to connect with someone. Get inside their head. Let them get inside yours. The worst of the Sith were picked off because they were lonely.”

“You know a lot about this for someone who’s not a Jedi.”

She cast her eyes in his direction, then focused once more on the bearing before tossing it to the kid. “I had some early training before the Republic fell. Went to ground once Order 66 went out.”

“How old were you the year of the fall?”

“Ten.”

A bitter laugh barked out of him. “We’re the same age. You look good for forty-four.”

Rayne smiled. “So do you. The beskar takes at least ten years off.”

He tilted his helmet to the side. “Makes for an even complexion, anyway.”

“You could be a Tusken under all that and have a lifespan of two hundred years for all I know.”

He shook his head. “No. I’m human. Same as you.”

“Guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”

For the first time since he’d arrived, Rayne felt him hold her gaze through the visor. She reciprocated, waiting. After a few moments, still facing her, he pulled at the tips of the fingers of his right glove with his left hand, taking it off to reveal a perfectly normal-looking human hand. Olive skin that would be bronze if it ever saw any sun. Long fingers, nails neatly filed to the quick. After a few moments, he put the glove back on.

“Thank you,” she said. “You didn’t have to.”

“You’re welcome. Something about making connections.” He made a show of turning his head all the way to his left, all the way to his right, then back to her. “I’m curious how that worked out for you.” His tone made it clear that he had observed the lack of anyone else around the hangar.

She leaned back in her chair and caught the bearing as the kid threw it to her without taking her gaze off of Din. “Fair question. I was married for ten years. He was a good man. Died in an Imperial attack five years ago, at the end of the war. I had a few before, had a couple since. Just because they didn’t last doesn’t mean I didn’t gain anything from them. I’m still friends with the ones who aren’t dead. I wouldn’t give them up for the world. Each one of them gave me experiences I wouldn’t otherwise have had.  Each one of them taught me something about myself. Each one of them gave me moments of joy. Learning how relationships evolve is a good skill. Denying your own feelings gets you nowhere and only leaves you bitter. That’s where the Jedi got it wrong. Not getting laid leads to a heaping pile of bitterness. Bitterness leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. And that, my shiny friend, leads to the Dark Side.” She threw the bearing to Din, this time. “So. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Any connections get made past that helmet?”

He took a deep breath, thoughts of Omera way too close to the surface for his liking. But Rayne had been frank with her answer, and she deserved his answer in kind. “We’re not celibate. The helmet stays on. It can only come off if it’s completely dark. No attachments outside of clan membership, if you choose to be part of one.”

“I’m curious how that’s worked out for you.”

Another deep breath. “That’s also a fair question.”

“And?”

God, she isn’t going to let me get out of this. He looked down at the bearing in his hands. “The Mandalorians brought me in as a foundling and raised me in the Fighting Corps. I couldn’t fit with any of the existing clans and wasn’t looking to start my own. I gave any extra money I had to the foundlings at whatever covert I was based out of at the time. The Armorer – the leader of the covert on Nevarro…” he paused, shoving the horrors of the slaughtered remains down in his mind so he could get through this. “She declared me and the kid a clan of two last week.” He shrugged his right shoulder, seeming to indicate the mudhorn signet on the pauldron there. “As far as the other stuff goes, I can’t give you a number. It’s… not in my nature to count. Longest I’ve had since leaving the covert I grew up at was maybe a couple years. That got a little crazy and I had to move on. Last one was about a year and a half ago. I passed up an opportunity nine months ago. I’m… not sure I did the right thing, there.”

“What happened?” Rayne asked.

“Didn’t want to start something I couldn’t finish.”

“Got too attached.”

“Yes.”

“Her or you?” Din’s silence stretched longer than she expected, so again, she decided to make it easy on him. “Both.”

“Yes.”

“And with the bounty hunters after you…”

“It was unsafe to stay.”

She nodded. “Tough situation. Sorry to hear it.”

“Thank you.” Again, his voice cracked through the modulator, confirming the sorrow that he couldn’t help but radiate.

“So what will you do next time?” she asked.

“Next time?”

God, he’s going to make me do all the work here. “Next time you have the opportunity to make a connection.”

“It… depends.”

“Assume the other party understands the conditions. Mandatory helmet. No strings attached. Bounty hunters not at the doorstep for the moment.”

Like… right… now…

He finally realized what she was offering. Finally realized what had been sitting in the pit of his stomach since yesterday’s test flight. Maybe even since the start, when he’d seen how well the kid had taken to her so quickly.

But… Omera… oh, god he’d come so close with Omera. Had almost let her lift the helmet from his head. Had almost… But he knew that would have been an attachment he could not have borne to break. He deserved the knot that formed in his gut when he thought of her. He deserved it for letting his discipline slip. For letting her in. Knowing that she had made the same mistake of him only made it worse. The best he could do was console himself with the knowledge that she was safer with him and the kid far away. The best way to keep her safe was to keep his distance. 

As far as Xi’an… well… she had clearly been a mistake. A remnant from a darker part of his life. A history he had worked so hard to claw his way out of. Only she had liked him that way. Ruthless. Brutal. Murdering. She had validated that part of him. When you were so good at killing, it was easy to start to like it. Until one day you find yourself in a room full of corpses you created and the woman you’ve been sleeping with walks in and thinks it’s the hottest thing she’s ever seen in her life and you realize that maybe this is kinda fucked up and you want out.

He had turned that corner, good and hard. Had proved it to himself when he didn’t kill her when he had the chance, even if she probably deserved it.

I won’t make those mistakes again. I won’t.

Not for this woman. It didn’t matter that the kid got along with her so well. It didn’t matter that the ship responded to her touch in ways it never had for him. It didn’t matter that she could bring him to the ground with a sword. It didn’t matter that she was somehow able to meet his gaze through the helmet with her eyes every time she looked at him.

Those eyes. The steely blue of freshly-polished beskar. Pinning his own when everyone else looked a little too far to the left or the right, missing the mark just a bit.

Goddammit.

Rayne lacked Omera’s beauty. Where Omera’s toughness was graceful, Rayne was all utilitarian wire and sometimes even a little clumsy. Omera was rooted to her home, where Rayne drifted to safety. Omera had her community, where Rayne made due with a string of companions and the robots she’d built with her bare hands. Omera provided for the kid, where Rayne had him hunting frogs and developing his Force skills. Both were pragmatic in their own ways. But he had to admit that Rayne was sharp. She cut directly to the heart of an issue and dissected it with a surgeon’s skill, pointed out the problem with the tip of the scalpel.

And she read him like a goddamn book.

He might as well just stand naked before her.

That can be arranged.

Goddammit.

He realized he still hadn’t answered her question when the silence was broken by a gurgle from the kid, hands outstretched, waiting for Din to toss the bearing. He’d been playing in the dirt for three days now, and it was starting to collect in the creases at the top of his head and in his ears.

“Can I… do you… can I give him a bath?” Yes. That’s my answer to the offer of intimacy. I need to give my kid a bath.

Rayne simply lifted an eyebrow and smiled. “Sure. He’ll fit in the dishtub in the kitchen. Come on in.”

Din heaved a sigh, heaved himself out of his chair, put the kid in his crate, and followed her through the door to the shop. They went in a short distance before turning through another door that opened to her residence as she flipped the light on. They entered a small, tidy kitchen, which was separated from a cozy living/bedroom area by a small peninsula counter. The lighting struck a warm hue against the adobe walls, but the open windows were arranged to maximize a cool breeze. Rayne pulled a plastic tub from the cabinet and placed it in the sink. “I’ll let you get the right water temperature for him. I’m gonna’ go take a shower – I can wash his clothes and blankets with my stuff.”

“Yes, please.” Din placed the kid in the tub, took his gloves off, stuffed them in his belt, and made a lifting motion with his hands. The kid raised his arms in response, huge dark eyes gazing up at the visor, smiling as Din undid the fastening of his robe and lifted it off of his arms.

A mythosaur pendant hung on a leather string from the kid’s shoulders. Suspicions confirmed, Rayne did her best to suppress a frown.

Mandalorian Jedis were a mixed bag, at best.

Din handed the kid’s robe to her along with the blankets. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She handed him a clean towel to dry the kid off with and headed to the shower.

When she came back out, she found them sitting on the bed, the kid wrapped in the towel, lying on his back on Din’s thighs as Din dried his ears, lids drooping over his eyes. She handed the robe back to Din, fresh out of the clothes unit, and placed the blankets in the crate. “Looks like he’s ready for bed.”

“Yes, he is.” The sight of a fully armored Mandalorian hunched over and wrestling a tiny, green, sleepy baby back into his clothes was almost too much, but she managed to stifle the laugh. When he was done, he lifted the kid back to the crate and wrapped him in the blanket. Only then did he stand up and face her. “It seems I’m the only dirty one left. Do you mind if I…”

She smiled. “Mine’s a lot bigger than yours. Go ahead.”

His head dropped in thanks. “I need a few things out of the ship. I’ll be right back.”

“Sure.”

He returned a few minutes later with his kit and she showed him where the towels and clothes unit were. “Hair dryer is under the sink.”

“Thank you.”

She left him to it.

Feeling reasonably secure about the lock on the door, he lifted the helmet from his head, placed it on the floor, and stacked the armor next to it. Peeling all of the layers off, he stuffed his cloak and clothes in the unit to get clean. Stepping into the shower, he relished the feel of warm water running through his hair and over his shoulders. He stood still for a moment, taking some mental space to relax, to be out of the armor and yet still feel safe, very much aware of the fob scrambler somewhere overhead keeping him that way.

He was unused to the idea of someone else protecting him.

Someone who wasn’t even really a soldier. Nor a Mandalorian.

If anything, an ancestral enemy.

Things were simple with Mandalorian women when neither of you were part of a clan. Everyone knew the rules. No attachments. If you wanted the lights on, helmets stayed on. If you wanted the helmets off, lights stayed off. You didn’t get many chances, so when you got one, you made it good. Good sex was like good fighting – it required training, but you were also encouraged to develop your own style. Din had both. Contraception depended on what kind of work the woman was up to and what she wanted. With Mandalorian numbers so low, pregnancy was revered. Pregnant women worked until they no longer could, then they went back to the covert and were properly cared for. Obstetric science among the Mandalorians rivaled even their trauma medicine.  Mandalorian doctors boasted the lowest maternal and neonatal fatality rates for all of the species that were represented among the ranks. Women brought forth their children. After, they nursed, if they were mammalian. They recovered. They received more training. They trained the younglings. The stories Din heard from mothers returned when he was a child still rang with great clarity in his memory. How to extricate yourself from a bar fight. How to negotiate with mechanics. How to clear the mud from your rifle. How to gut a Taun Taun without making it smell like ten-year-old garbage. And then, when the child was weaned, the women returned to the field. The children were either adopted by a clan or raised by the men and women of the Fighting Corps who were suited best for the task, who knew how to prepare them for the harsh world that awaited them. They were the true parents. Mothers who were not part of a clan were told nothing of their children; the same went for clan-less fathers. Contributing to the enclave was good. But it was best not to know the specifics. To hear about the fall of a fellow Mandalorian was bad enough. To know they were your own blood would be devastating. As bad as the carnage at the covert at Nevarro had been, he considered himself lucky that he had not been there long enough to form much in the way of friendships. Further proof of the point.

And so, intimacy with Mandalorian women, such as it was, was easy enough. Physically satisfying. Often fun. Usually safe. Never any strings attached.

But with anyone else...

In most ways, it was easier for the women. The only trick lay in finding anyone who was any good at it and didn’t expect anything after. Pregnancy was celebrated. It brought in fresh blood and the children were always cared for. But for the men… for the men who preferred women, anyway… the universe had enough orphans. Making more was unconscionable. You wrapped it up. Every time. You made it abundantly clear that there would be no attachments, that you would eventually move on and never see each other again.

And you didn’t take chances with the lights. You kept your fucking helmet on.

And so, with anyone else, things were… difficult. He’d only chanced it with two. The first was looking for nothing more than one night, ravenous, and seemed to have a kink for armor, so the results had been satisfactory, if even a little humorous. Xi’an was hot in that scary kind of way, back when he liked being scared because it meant he wasn’t dead. The woman just on the other side of the door right now… definitely wasn’t a fan of the armor, but had a healthy appetite and would be happy to have him for whatever time she could. She was good with a blade, but she wasn’t a psycho about it. She was more than capable of taking care of herself and was comfortable with her independence. He had to admit to himself that he had a certain weakness for women who were capable of killing him, and he had no doubt that Rayne had it in her.

Being in close quarters with an enemy sorcerer would be a unique challenge. Given what he had seen, given what he had heard, she didn’t need weapons to kill him. Hell, she didn’t even need her hands.

She could kill him with her mind.

He wasn’t sure he knew what was normal, anymore. He wasn’t sure he had ever known what was normal. All he knew was that he wouldn’t last more than a minute with her if he didn’t take pre-emptive action.

He took himself in hand and resolved the issue.

Head cleared, body clean, he stepped out of the shower and dried off, then flossed and brushed his teeth while he was naked, just because he could. The tile on the floor felt blessedly cool under his feet, and the draft of ventilation pricked goosebumps on his skin. Having the opportunity to shave, he took it. He fished out the hairdryer and blew his hair dry, enjoying the warm air on the back of his neck. I gotta’ get one of these. When everything was done, he packed up his kit, hung it on the knob, and regarded himself in the mirror once more. Remember who you are. Remember who you are not. This is the Way.

And keep your fucking helmet on.

---

He stepped through the door, anxiety radiating off of him in waves. That peculiar mix of anticipation, fear, and, despite his recent release, the desire for more. “Thank you. I feel… better.”

“You’re welcome.” She stepped closer, gauging his reaction as she did so. His balance shifted more to anticipation, but his fear caught up with it again. She was still for a moment, noting the rise and fall of his chest, fists clenched at his side. He wouldn’t be able to bring himself to ask. Once again, she would have to make this easy for him. “Would you like some company tonight?”

“I would.”

The surge of anxiety almost knocked her over. “Your place or mine?”

“I’d be more comfortable on the ship.”

“I understand.”

He turned to the kid’s crate and froze. “He likes to nap on the flight deck sometimes, but he doesn’t always stay there. I don’t…” Again, another wave of anxiety, complete inability to move his thoughts forward.

“He’ll sleep through it. Two hours of playing Force-catch should have worn him out.” Din visibly relaxed. Not much, but a little. “And just so you know…” she reached out and traced the plate at his wrist. “People who are Force-sensitive… within a short range, we can tell when… the Force responds to orgasm.”

A small choking sound clicked over the modulator. “I needed to clear my head.”

She smiled. “Did it work?”

“Clearly not.” He looked back towards the kid. “What’s the range?”

“For me? I’m guessing twenty-five meters or so. For him? Probably more. Definitely longer than the length of the Razor Crest’s hull. Having the helmet on probably cuts it down some.” She prodded his arm to get him to turn his head back to her. “We grow up with it. It’s part of life. We take it for granted and are surprised when we discover that no one else feels it. When we’re little we don’t even know what causes it. Like hearing birds chirp or when someone gives you a blanket when you’re cold. It… just feels nice. It’s nothing to feel creeped out over. If anything, it probably helps him sleep better. I thought you should know.”

“Thank you for telling me.” He took her hands in his, then looked down, acknowledging this first time of reaching out to touch her. “The helmet stays on. I know that’ll be tough for you, but that’s how it has to be.”

“I understand.”

“And when I leave, you won’t ever hear from me again.”

“I know.”

“This is the Way.”

“Okay.”

She followed him out to his ship, Din carrying his kit, the kid floating next to him in the crate, soft snores coming from under the blankets. They walked up the rear ramp and she hit the button to close it when she reached the hold as Din continued on to the flight deck. He placed the crate on the starboard jump-seat, tucked the kid in one more time, laid a finger on his forehead, and wished him goodnight. He stepped out, closed the door to the flight deck, and came down to the hold.

He sat back on one of the lower rungs of the ladder to take his boots off, noticing as she turned to the bunk. It was really small in there.

“Second thoughts?” he asked.

“Hm? No. I’m just… a little claustrophobic.” Her gaze lingered on the bunk for a moment more before coming back to his. “I’ll make it work.”

He titled his head. You sure?

She took a deep breath. “I’m good.”

“Ok.” He stepped forward and took her hands in his.

She could feel him trembling through the gloves. Looking him up and down, she realized that undressing a Mandalorian was going to be a complex task. And he probably wasn’t going to be entirely comfortable with it. But she sure as hell wasn’t going to shed all the layers first with him still in full gear. She released his grip and ran her hands along his forearms. “Can we start with the armor?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want to do it or should I?”

“I should do the vambraces.” Indeed, taking them off looked like an intricate procedure, unlocking the clips under his forearms without setting off the weaponry along the top. Once they were off, he pulled a drawer open and placed them inside. He also un-holstered his sidearm blaster and undid the utility belt, placing them in the same drawer, then turned back to her. “You can do the rest.” His voice was tight over the modulator.

She slid her hands up his arms to his shoulders, slid her right hand across his chest to the pauldron on his left shoulder, and realized she was completely flummoxed as to how to remove it. He permitted himself a soft laugh and showed her how to do it, then allowed her to do the one on the right herself. They did the same for his thigh guards, him showing her how for the left, her doing the right. He guided her hands to his sides to unclip the fastenings for the chest and backplates, the cloak coming off with them. The last items to go in the drawer were his gloves.

He stood before her in nothing but a helmet, black shirt, and black pants. Aside from the helmet, he could have been a normal person.

Now, finally, she had a better idea of his actual size. Just a shade under two meters. A surprisingly moderate build, but with broad shoulders, chest tapering to his hips.

“Your turn,” he said.

She lifted an eyebrow. “We’re not done with you yet.”

“I’ll follow your lead.”

“Fair enough.” She didn’t have much to take off. She’d come out in the clothes she normally slept in; just a loose sand-colored shirt and black leggings, plus the pair of sandals on her feet. Her hands dropped to the bottom hem of her shirt, and he followed suit. “Ready?”

“Yes.”

Her eyes never left his visor as she pulled her shirt off over her head and he did the same with his, the hole at the top of his shirt just big enough to get the helmet through. They stood before each other, both naked from the waist up, regarding each other.

His build may have been moderate, but what he had was all business. Lean muscle through his shoulders, arms, chest, and abs, made all the more defined by his olive skin. Several scars marked him where the armor hadn’t reached; high on his left arm, low across the ribs on his right side, a fresh one on the inside of his right shoulder. His left shoulder was a little higher than his right, the sign of a collarbone broken long ago. Her build was moderate as well. Not much curve, but strong. Athletic. Her skin was fair but tanned reasonably well in the sun, leaving her a few shades lighter than him. She took a slow spin around, giving him a good view of her back, a tattoo of the Rebel Alliance Starbird sigil on her left shoulder. What looked like a scar from a blaster bolt graze ran from the top of her left shoulder blade to the top of the muscle. He reciprocated, revealing another scar just below his right shoulder blade, the muscles in his back forming a valley to his spine.

“Like what you see so far?” She asked.

“I do. You?”

“I do.” She stepped closer to him, just within arm’s reach, and she had to look up to the visor. “May I touch you?”

“… Yes.”

Even now, he was still hesitant. She reached up and ran her hands along his collarbones, noting the asymmetry, feeling the rise and fall of his chest. He drew a sharp breath at the feel of her fingers along his skin. Her hands were an odd mix of calluses and softness by way of turning wrenches and submersion in engine grease on a daily basis. When she reached his throat, she slid her hands up as far as she could go, catching just a bit of hair at the back of his neck, below the helmet. She slid her hands down his ribs, smiling when he winced in a ticklish flinch, and rested her hands at the top of his pants. “Do you want to touch me?”

“Yes.”

He brought his hands to her face, running his thumbs along her cheekbones, then pushed his fingertips through her hair, up through the short chestnut curls. “My hair is dark,” he said, voice cracking. “It’s too long right now… longer than yours. It’s getting a little gray around the temples.” He ran his thumbs along her eyebrows, pausing at the outside corners of her eyes. “My eyes are brown. They’re deep-set like yours. I have the same lines under them at the corners.” His fingertips spread along the backs of her jaws. “I have high cheekbones, but my face is rounder. My nose is arched. I… actually have kind of a big mouth.” She raised an eyebrow in response. He laughed. “I know, right? I’ve managed to keep all my teeth, and they’re in decent shape.” He dropped his hands to her shoulders, noting the thrumming tension there. “Is there anything else you’d like to know?”

“What are your eyebrows like?”

“Normal, I guess. Unremarkable. Two lines between them, right here.” He slid his thumbs through the same place on her.

“Facial hair?”

“Just shaved.”

She smiled. “That covers all the bases. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

He resisted the urge to press his head to hers, the traditional Mandalorian prelude to intimacy when wearing a helmet, heeding her discomfort with the armor. Instead, he brought a finger to her mouth, laying its length between her lips. Taking his meaning, she kissed it. Gently at first, then she took his hand in both of hers and pressed harder, taking it between her teeth, pressing her tongue around it. His other hand slid from her shoulder down her back, flattening against the end of her spine and pressing her hips to his. She kissed all of the knuckles of his hand, blind to the small nicks and scars, eyes closed, listening as the rhythm of his breath picked up. When his hand was thoroughly wet, he pulled it away from her mouth, trailed it down her chin, her throat, sternum, her belly, and slipped the tip of a finger into her navel.

The rest of their clothing fell away and he guided her to his bed.

He opened a drawer in the bulkhead and extracted a small, wrapped package.

“So that Jedi sterilization thing…” her words trailed off.

He nodded. “I wondered.”

“Another perk about being Force-sensitive is that I don’t contract or transmit diseases. So if your supply is limited...”

I’m too naked as it is. Maybe they could unpack all that later, but for the moment, Mandalorian training for protection in all things outweighed the human desire for direct contact. Otherwise completely flummoxed, he fell back on the old mantra. “This is the Way.”

“Ok.”

The immediacy of her acceptance encouraged him.

They lay together, hands running over bare skin, both of them taught muscle and sinew over bone, acquainting themselves with each other with desperate intensity. She pressed one hand against the helmet, pushing his head away even as she gripped his flesh with the other, her meaning clear. Don’t touch me with the metal. Instead, he once more brought a finger to her lips, she once more wet it, and he made her ready.

He was patient, unhurried, disciplined, secretly enjoying the power he seemed to have over the enemy sorcerer as she became undone before him. Finally, she brought her lips to the space between his shoulder and his neck, whispering the word “Please,” over and over.

They joined. They moved. They breathed. She warned him that things with a Force-sensitive partner might be different. He accepted. And so he was ready for it when the tell-tale moan parted her lips, ready when something gripped his spine in rhythmic pulses matching those that gripped the flesh he had sunk into her. His own release came shortly after, and once again she felt the warmth of it bloom in her mind as he shuddered against her.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “Thank you, thank you…”

He was always so polite.

After, she turned around to spoon back into him, tolerating the press of his helmet against the back of her head, the wash of his mind over hers worth the price of the beskar against her skull. For a short time, he was at peace, too destroyed to think much about anything, and she was content to enjoy the warmth of his body around her. It wasn’t long until she noticed a change in his breathing, a cloud of sadness gathering within him. Continued regret at the lost opportunity from months ago. Fresh wounds from the carnage at the covert at Nevarro. She brought his hand to her lips, again kissing the length of his finger. Without thinking, she reached out with her mind to soothe his.

“Stop.” His response was immediate, followed with a rush of anger. “Get out of my head. Let me feel what I’m supposed to feel.”

She let go of his mind, shocked at the rage in his voice, but she gripped his hand. “I’m sorry. You’re right. It was a reflex.”

“Don’t ever do that again.”

“I won’t. I’m sorry. I… wanted to help.”

She felt him take a deep breath behind her, his lungs filling against her back. “Then just talk to me. With words.”

The irony of him asking her to talk was not lost on her, but she let it slide. He needed this. “It’s ok to feel this way. It’s ok to think about her. It’s ok to miss her. It’s ok to mourn the others. There’s enough room for all of us in here.”

The anger was replaced with a sudden rush of gratitude and he held her tight against him. She held his hand to her face and kissed along his thumb as the sorrow returned and he wept, shaking and silent.

After a short time, he noticed that his hand was wet from her tears, and he belatedly realized he’d projected a year’s worth of angst at her after refusing to let her calm him down. “God, that was selfish of me. You were just protecting yourself. I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s fine.” She snuggled into him. “I can block it when I have to.”

“Do you think the kid got any of that?”

“Oh he got every bit of it.”

“Dammit.”

“He’ll be fine. He’s tougher than you think. It’s easier when it comes from a good place.”

Din gave a shaky sigh and sat up. “Might be a good idea to get dressed. He crawls in here with me sometimes. And after that…”

“Yeah. Is there enough room in here for all of us?”

He turned his head in her direction and let out an exhale that was probably a laugh. “Yes.” He scooped up his clothes. “I’ll be right back. Inside of my helmet got wet, somehow.”

She smiled and dressed while he locked himself in the other room to dry things out.

When he returned, he crawled back in and lay facing her in the dim light, letting her take his hand in hers. They were still as she stared into the visor. She smiled after several minutes. “I don’t know what’s creepier for you – having me stare at you with your eyes closed back there or your eyes open. Which one have I been doing?”

He gave a small laugh to let her know he was smiling. “They’re open. No more creepy than for you not knowing if I’ve been staring back.”

“Have you?”

“Yes.”

She smiled and bit his finger with a gentle nip.

“May I ask a question?” His voice was low over the modulator.

“Yes.”

“The sterilization thing.”

“Yes.” Her smile disappeared, but she still held his hand and his gaze.

“How old were you?”

“Six, I think.”

“Did they give you a choice?” His voice cracked.

“I don’t remember being given one.”

“Your parents allowed this?”

“I don’t remember my parents. The Jedi recruited us as soon as possible. I’m told I was picked up after I started throwing spoons with my brain when I was six months old.”

Din’s mind was reeling. “So you were on your own when the Republic fell.”

“Yes.”

“When you were ten.”

“Yes.”

“You were a foundling.” His voice cracked again and he felt something tighten in his chest.

“No. I was on my own. No one ever found me.”

Again, she heard the faint sound of his teeth clicking shut, and he tightened his hand around hers. “I found you.” Oh god, what am I doing?

She kept her expression neutral. What the hell does he think he’s doing? “I guess you did.”

They both jumped when a small squeak emitted from the foot of the bunk and a tiny green hand reached up. Din sat up and pulled the kid into bed with them. “How do you keep sneaking up on me like that?”

“I didn’t even hear the door from the flight deck open,” Rayne said.

“I always find it still closed when he does this. It’s like he phases through the bulkheads.”

The kid laughed in what Rayne swore was with a mischievous tone, crawling up between the two of them before plonking himself down, pulling his blanket up around his chin, and closing his eyes with a smile on his face. Din tucked the blanket around him, forming a tight little bundle. “Time for bed, I guess.”

“Sounds like a good plan.” They settled down, but she still found herself staring at the visor before her. “One last thing.”

“Yes?”

“Rayne isn’t my real name.”

“No?”

“You were honest about your name, so I’ll be as honest as I can about mine. It’s safer for you if you don’t know it.”

“Order 66,” he repeated.

“Yes.”

“I understand. Thank you for telling me what you could.” His hold on her hand tightened for a moment. “I’m closing my eyes now.” He did sound tired.

“Ok. Me too.”

In truth, he waited for her to close hers first. When she did, the tightness in his chest released, but just a little. He wondered at the little boy who he had finally come to accept as his own. He wondered at the woman who had given him shelter, in more ways than one. He wondered at the relationship forming between the two, the Force bonding them together as she taught him how to use it the best she could.

He wondered if he was looking at his family, right now.

He wondered what the hell he was doing.

And then he closed his eyes.

[pbandjesse]

Today was fun! Also a little stressful but just the slightest bit. Mostly it was fun. My feet hurt though from all the walking we did. It was great. I feel happy and tired. 

We are in Juneau right now. A name I have struggled to spell all day. But I was excited to see it!!

I slept alright last night. We fell asleep with the bridge cam on and then could not turn the TV off? Like the remote died and there aren't any buttons so it was just stuck on. Thankfully on mute. We would get up together and get dressed and left a note on our door that the TV was stuck. And housekeeping would fix it for us, thank you house keeping. 

Breakfast was nice. We started a little later and so we didn't rush to go to the origami of the day. Instead we just took our time. Everything was beautiful outside. I was just really loving watching the new mountains. So after breakfast we walked up to the pool deck to find a lounge chair to hang out in together. It was brisk out. So James went back to the room and got out blanket and their fleece. I was already wearing mine. And we just watched and laughed and even got to see some whales!! Just some creating, but it was amazing. But that would be once we went inside to warm up on the couches. 

I had a great time though. I figured out a way to hang my phone on the raining for pictures. And James kept laughing at me but I'm an innovator. I was very proud of my system. And we got cute pictures which is all I want. I am absolutely loving collecting these moments. They made me so happy. 

We would go inside though to hang out in the couches. James went back for my tablet and their book. The lounge was a little to loud but headphones helped. This is where there was almost a fight because someone stood in front of someone's view. And the person standing decided the best thing to do was to be slightly racist to this woman. Which made everyone around basically go. Seriously dude shut up. It was bizarre. 

People were a little on edge today, excited to get off the ship. James was also a little tired. They said they were going to go lay down and to come get them when I wanted to eat lunch. 

I decided this was the perfect time to take a walk alone. And this was fun! I would find a new spot for us to check out on the 8th level. There's a whole outside area! And there were barely any people at all. 

I was on a hunt for ducks still. And I saw someone getting one! I called out to them that they beat me to it but it turned out she didn't find it, she was hiding it! So we talked and she took a picture of me "finding it" and I told her how much I love that people do this and it's become a huge source of joy for me on this trip. And she loved that. She didn't know it was a thing until last week and she brought 100 ducks to hide!! I hadn't found any of hers yet, but I would end up finding 2 more. I left the original one I found her hiding, and continued on my trek. 

I found an area where you can stand on glass floor and watch the back of the ship. And I couldn't wait to bring James out there. 

I went back to the room right around noon to get James for lunch. This ended up being kind of a bad plan. James did not rest the way they had hoped, becoming awake again when they got back to the room. And they were just a little overtired. 

So when we got to the buffet and it seemed like everyone was there was stressful. People we lining up instead of just grabbing and moving on. I just grabbed and went and someone tisked at me and I was just like. You guys are making this work, stop making lines!! This would be a theme of the day. 

Poor James though was overwhelmed and couldn't get any food. And then we could not get a table. Nothing was available. Annoying but not the worst. I decided we would go sit outside. And that was nice because of the views. And because James was a little overstressed I would go get more pizza for them and we shared fries and a dessert and everything would be okay.

But then it was my turn to be on edge. We decided to go get the trivia of the day and walk around. I wanted to get our stuff together for whatever we could need for getting off the ship. Id cards, charger, binoculars, ECT. And that was a good plan. It took some stress away. 

I brought James to the 8th deck and we took pictures and watched the ship come into port. It would take a while. But that was fine. I was just loving the veiw and the person I was with and this was just. Perfect in so many ways. 

But the stress was still there. We went down to the card room after hearing from staff we wouldn't be off the ship until closer to 3 and got a game to play to pass the time. 

This was a new card game and so we had to learn the rules. And I got really upset when I felt like James was rushing me but I know I was being a little to much. I was just stressed but that's not a good excuse. James would get us water and we would mostly finish the game and it was fun but I wanted to know what was happening. Because when James went to get water they said there was a huge line forming. 

Just as we walked out of the library the cruise director came over the intercom and told everyone to get out of these lines they created, that the lines are not authorized. 

Bet. I don't have to be in a line, so I won't. I asked another couple to share some arm chairs. And we just waited. 

And when they made the call we could go I told James to hold my purse strap and we just went through the door. Your line was not authentic or authorized. So I don't have to abide by it. And we were off the ship in under 5 minutes. 

There was a shuttle into town. So that was really cool. We would walk the half hour back later but it was already late in the day and the musuem I wanted to go to was only open until 430. But we made it just in time. The lovely man on the bus got us downtown and me and James immediately walked the 15 minutes to the museum. And it was perfect. 

I had such a good time. Learning all about the local nations and seeing all the artifacts but also stuff from artists and artisans of today! I talked to some of the staff to get some direction for my programing and other things to read. They even gave me their business cards to contact them later for more questions. 

James also just took pictures of things they thought would help me. And things we both thought were interesting. Like the paint made of malachite. Amazing, I love to learn more about the use of natural resources. It only will make the program stronger. 

They directed us around the corner and down the street to check out an exhibit  and gift shop of currant indigenous artists. And it was great! We got a bunch of souvenirs for our families. I was having a blast. A lot of it was expensive so we didn't get everything we liked, we are trying to be pragmatic. Especially since we have to fit it in my luggage. 

It was about 5 at this point. And we walked though the main street. So much jewelery. Just an unreasonable amount. But we got to go in some locally owned shops and got a few stickers and pins and James got me another abolone piece of jewelry. This time a pendant. I love my James so much and they are so sweet trying to make me happy. Just being with them makes me happy, tokens are just a bonus. 

Something really cool we got to see was ravens! Which are literally the size of cats, they are chunky. And loud! But were really really cool to see so close up. They were just hanging out. Did you know a group of ravens is called an unkindness? 

We went in a bunch of places. And spent to much money but we had fun. We read sig s. And learned things. And it was just really nice. But I was getting tired and thirsty. We would sit on a bench and talk for a while. Took some more pictures. James spotted a seal! We got to see sea planes taking off and landing. And I was happy. But also I was ready to go. 

It's hard, because this trip is so much about going from one thing to the next but you also don't want to waste time. And that includes knowing when to call it a day and not feel bad about that. 

But James said it was okay. So we walked the half hour back to the ship. A few people came behind us. I stopped to take pictures of plants. And then were getting back on board. 

We got to go through the crew entrance. We got scanned and xrayed. And then had to wait forever for the elevator. 

But that was okay. We got back to our room and discovered a note that someone's luggage is missing and they were wondering if we saw it. No such luck. We also had an issue with our lights staying in but the staff member who came helped us sort it out and everything was fine. 

We decided to change into swim suits. And that after dinner we would go in the hot tub and watch the sunset. 

And that's exactly what we did. We had sandwiches and pizza and weird cakes.we chatted with the staff. I love how excited they all are to see this nature too. Many of them are from the Philippines and this is their first Alaska cruise. So it's lovely that we are all in this together. 

 It was so empty though and it was great. And after we finished our weird Texas themed desserts we went outside. 

The hot tub was super fun. I loved being in nature. I had some displaced energy though and was being a little silly and I was insisting on pictures and was having a blast. The sun was setting and it was just the best time. I feel so in love with James and it just is so perfect. 

Even if we agree we probably wouldn't do a cruise again, this has been such a fun adventure. I don't think we could have done this many things on a normal trip, so I'm glad we did it this way. But I think we probably just aren't cruise people. I'm glad we got this experience, I am having a blast. But this won't be an every year thing for sure. It's surprising thing how many people we have met that do this like. All the time. I'm glad it makes them happy. 

After we got cleaned up from the hot tub we decided to come to the lounge and watch the sun finish setting. And now we are waiting to see if everyone makes it back on board before we leave in the next 15 minutes. Fingers crossed everyone makes it on!! Tomorrow is Skagway! And more gold rush stuff!! I'm excited to learn more and see new things. Let's hope our luck with the weather holds. 

Good just everyone. Stay safe. I hope you are having as much joy as I am!!

[strawberrystreamfields]

Carolina's Journal Log 12:

Tea. I just need tea. Looks like I should've worn some warmer clothing yesterday, seeing as I might have gotten a bit of a cold. Should we have stayed back at Jorvik Stables? Probably. Did we? Absolutely not. Passing through one of the massive gates, we made a B-line for a nearby café. 3 cups of scalding hot tea later, we finally left Jarlaheim. Our pathway took us up the high road towards the Goldspur's farm.

We headed into Greendale, striding through the snow. Or, given how little green was still visible, Whitedale now. Some mushrooms and flowers were still peeking out from beneath the glistening snow. The thick, tightly knitted canopy of the forest only revealed a bare few patches of aquamarine-colored sky tinted with teal, light blue, green, and occasionally violet streaks of light.

The ramps of logs leading up to some extra layers were precarious to climb, but we made it up unscathed. Some of the layers of earth and roots covered in snow resembled cakes. And now I'm hungry. Nevertheless, we continued traversing the snowy landscape of Greendale as we went.

Rosedawn and I passed some violets peeking out from beneath the snow, as well as more mushrooms and a couple of fairy circles, careful not to disturb them. We headed down to the somewhat icy path to Wolf Hall Inn. That place gives me a bad feeling.

The earthen, root-decorated tunnel that connected Greendale and Wolf Hall Inn had a few squirrels as well as a rabbit hidden inside as we passed by, all of them bolting at the sound of Rosedawn's hoofbeats. We stopped inside the tunnel for a few minutes, pausing for Rosedawn to have an apple and for me to have a granola bar. I oughtta restock on snacks soon.

The pair of us practically bolted past Wolf Hall Inn, yelling out a somewhat strained 'hello' to Ed Field as we ran past in a blur, slowing slightly as soon as we were a good 100 meters away. A few things that guy's said give me a bad feeling. On a lighter note, Silverglade Castle sat in the distance, a visible landmark of the land. We crossed through the iron gate to Epona, trotting past the Dew family's old farm. Sad to see what it's been reduced to, especially after the stories Maya's told about what it was like.

Turning up the path to Guardian's Dale, we came across the Soul Riders all camped out. Seeing them like that brought back memories of our daring rescue of Anne. Speaking of Anne, she'd gone to grab some food from the tent when we showed up. She emerged a minute later, so the 5 of us talked for a while.

Bidding the Soul Riders adieu, we headed through the wild, winding path to the Dale. For a brief moment, I let myself get lost in thought. Rosedawn snapped me our of my thoughts with a light neigh. We'd made it.

Guardian's Dale looked magical in the snow. The four Guardians stood proudly, guarding the portal at the end. The portal. The last time I'd seen that thing, it hadn't ended pleasantly. Slowly, we approached the Pandoric Keystone, still hovering upon its stand. Aideen be with you. I won't lose another girl. There is so much I never got to tell you. I'm so proud of you. Because she loved you, we all do. Now you know where to go when you're feeling kinda low. The voices melded together in my mind as everything about that day came rushing back. Tears pooled in my eyes. I still can't believe she's gone, and I can't help but wonder if I could've done something more. We turned and left, the memories having become too much. Maybe one day I'll be able to stand here and say to her, 'We did it. Thanks to you, we did it.' But today is not that day.

[ninlilwinds]

Hi sorry to bother you, but do you perhaps know the fic where the reader is one of ei's puppet made after scara making them siblings in a sense, and the reader is ei's sole heir and she forgot about scara when he removed her memories of him when he left and then they meet under some circumstances and angst ensues

Hiya! I'm not 100% I did this right, but I tried my best! Hope you enjoy!

Plot: Scaramouche just found his long lost "sibling"

Warning: Not proofread so maybe some typos...? Any mistakes let me know and I'll change them!! :D

Scaramouche remembered the day the Raiden ripped you both apart. Your tear filled eyes and begs and how helpless and angry he felt. You expression slowly became duller and expressionless, and he knew you'd never see him the same way again.  

In fact he was sure you'd never see him again at all. Even if he went to find you, which he would not, how would he even react? Relieved?> Remorseful? Saddened? No, there was no use in even caring about something so ridiculous and non-important. Even if he did see you again, it wouldn't matter.  

.  

.  

.  

"Did you enjoy the almond tofu brought from Liyue?" Ei asked you.  Ever since Ei had come to her senses and the vision hunt decree had been over, Ei had felt really awful over what she did. She didn't regret it exactly, but she knew that if you ever remembered you'd hate her. But, what could she do now? 

So she simply decided spoiling you would be her way of coming to terms with what had happened.  

You nodded and looked out the window, with a sigh asking the question you asked every day, "May I go outside?"  

Ei frowned. You had been interested in the outside world and awful lot lately, ever since he vision hunt decree was over. You kept expressing you're want to explore. She knew how dangerous it could be, and the risk of her previous puppet wanting to destroy u out of spite and jealousy was still there, so she always said no.  

But she couldn't keep you in here forever. And she knew you were capable and could fight. Not to mention this could just be her overreacting.   You stared out the window, prepared for the "no", but to your surprise, she actually said, "you may."  

Looking up to her, your eyes widened, "r-really?" 

Ei nodded and frowned, "Just....be careful." She tried to send you a supportive smile and you jumped to your feet, walking out the door before she could take back her answer.  

And so you left, for the first time. Nerves twisted your stomach. What would you see? Many people that was for sure. Would they hate you? Like you? Make friends?  

You walked out the palace walls and into the city, your eyes darting everywhere, trying to take it all in. Today was going to be so much fun! 

.  

.  

.  

Or so you thought. Before long, you were lost in a dark alley with no idea of how to return back to the palace. You sat down thinking about how Ei would chew you out later for getting back late...if you even got back. Ahhh this was a bad idea wasn't it. What was so interesting about this place anyways. It was just....another plot of land. Why did you feel called to the outside?  

You didn't notice the light jingling or bells in the breeze and clanking of wood against the stone floor. A figure stood in front of you, and when you looked up you felt a bit scared. They had a huge scowl on their face and their eyes appeared to be in some pain. Was this a drunk? 

"What are you doing out here, (Y/N)? You're not supposed to-" 

"How do you know my name?"  

Oh right, he forgot you didn't remember, "I have connections."  

"Who are you?" 

Would his real name ring a bell? Well...he should not risk it..."My name is Scaramouche."  

"Oh, nice to meet you." You said with a smile, "U-umm....do you know the way back to the palace, Scaramouche?"  

He nodded and began to walk. He'd just take you there and leave.  

He felt so unlike himself. He would never do this for anyone else, but it was you. Not just someone. And you still looked just as he remembered.  Maybe some details had changed a bit, but besides that, you look perfectly normal.  

He couldn't help but smile a little. Oh how he missed the days of before. But he had to stop remembering them. They didn't matter. It was before and then but this is now.  

Once you reached the area you expressed your gratitude, "Thanks. I was pretty lost there."  

"Your sense of direction wasn't always the best." He noted.  

You stared at him for a while. How would he know?  

Ever since you saw him, he had had a familiar air about him. What was it exactly, you weren't sure. The slight jingle of his bells and wooden clanks on the floor, as well as how he carried himself all felt so familiar. Hm.........you had seen him somewhere but....but you just couldn't....remember  

(Good Ending) 

"Are you alright?" Scaramouche asked you as you bent down over grabbing your head.  

You shook your head, "No. Where have I seen you before? Have I? Am I going crazy?" 

Scaramouche knew this was his time to leave. Who knows what would happen if you remembered? You could get hurt, or worse. Your whole body could shut down. Your memories had been erased for a reason. He must not mess with this balance.  

But at the same time he couldn't help...wondering if he could finally have someone. He wouldn't be alone.  

Scaramouche had never felt so conflicted. Should he do the right or selfish thing? Well, he'd usually pick the selfish one, but this time your life hung on the line.  

He shook his head and turned to leave, it wasn't worth it. He could just...watch you from afar.  

"Kunikuzushi?" Your voice whispered. He stopped in his tracks.  

He hadn't heard that name is thousands of years...and oh how refreshing it felt.  

He turned on his heel to face you. You cheeks were wet with tears and your eyes were wide. You ran over and hesitated at first but then threw your arms around him. Scaramouche was not ok with people seeing him like this, but due to the circumstances, he'd excuse it for now.  

He pushed you away, "I better leave..." 

"Wait I have so many ques-" you mind whirred. There were so many things to ask and discuss  

"Later." He said waving and walking away, quickly lost in the crowd. 

'Later' meant he was coming back, and just the thought made you feel all happy and excited.  

(Neutral ending) 

"Argh!" You huffed. You just couldn't wrap your mind around it. Whatever you were forgetting wasn't important anyways. You'd never forget something important.  

Scaramouche stared at you, eyebrows raised, "Hm?" 

You shook your head, "Ah oh nothing. Thanks once again for taking me here. I'll get going now." Ou turned and left. 

He knew he should have known this was going to end like so, but he still felt a bit upset and disappointed. You had come so close...yet you were still so far... 

(Bad Ending) 

Scaramouche waved at u and turned to leave, only to hear you scream and drop. 

He turned around quickly, weapon drawn. What had happened. You were on the ground shaking and sobbing a little. It all happened too fast to even notice.  

No nothing had  happened. Then why were you on the ground? He kneeled down next to u, "(Y/N)! What's wrong?" 

"K-Kunikuzushi.... don’t leave..."  

He tensed. You remembered him, "I won't. I'll stay right here." 

Ei stepped out and shoved him aside, "What did you do?" 

He put on a brave front in front of his creator. He had to show her that what she had done had affected him in no way, "Me? Waste time on rip off?" He scoffed, "Don't be so dumb."  

Ei glared at him and picked you up, "Leave." She swiped a hand over your eyes, and a white substance passed from your forehead to her hand. 

Scaramouche knew what any chance he had to be with you was gone. Now there was no chance of you remembering him, "I was planning on doing so already. This place has gotten shabby. What a waste of space." He turned and walked away.  

Ei glared after him, holding you close to her for protection. 

You shuddered and looked after Scara's form, "Who was that...I feel like...I know him." 

Ei shook her head and brought you inside, never answering your question. 

[dreamescapeswriting]

Stray Kids Reaction || Didn’t Know That You Were Pregnant [Request]

CHAN:

It was supposed to be a relaxing day out with the rest of the boys, going for a walk around the Han River and taking photographs with Hyunjin but your stomach was beginning to cramp and you were having back pains. 

"Maybe you should sit down," Minho said as he noticed how slow you were walking behind them, panting out of breath you walked over to some of the benches beside a fence and sat down. 

"Here," Felix called out as he rushed to your side and gave you a bottle of water, Chan glanced over at you smiling weakly as he noticed how sick you looked. The fact that you'd been sick for most of the week was starting to worry him but you pushed it aside as nothing more than a sickness bug that would pass sooner or later.

"Maybe we should call it a day, you look worse than you did yesterday," Jisung said in a worried tone he didn't mean for it to sound mean but he was worried about you, as were the other boys. Jisung's eyes kept looking between you and Chan as he walked over to your side but you let out a yelp in pain, at first, you thought you'd dropped the bottle of water that Felix had handed to you but then you felt pain radiate up your back and around your abdomen,

"Gross, Y/n needs to control her bladder." Minho laughed as he saw the pool of fluid by your feet and assumed you had wet yourself but that was when Chan's face ran pale and he began to calculate in his head. 

"I-I think my water broke," You mumbled as you looked over at Chan, he was piecing everything together over the last nine months, you'd gained weight, you'd been suck more often not to mention the weird cravings you'd been getting. 

"Holy shit." You yelled out as you struggled to get up from the bench, holding onto your stomach where there was barely even a bump. 

"I'm going to be an uncle?!" Jeongin screamed out loudly enough that the lady that was working the hot chocolate stand looked up to see what the fuss was about. Chan took your hand in his, walking with you towards the car so they could get you to a hospital but all of the boys were freaking out more than the two of you, yelling about how they weren't prepared and nothing was ready since you had no idea you were pregnant. 

MINHO:

You always thought those who claimed not to know that they were pregnant were being dramatic but now you knew first hand that they weren't. Sitting on the maternity ward with your sleeping daughter in your arms while Minho sat beside you on the bed just watching her sleeping. You had been home when you felt a bad pain spreading over your body, you figured it was nothing until it got to the point you couldn't focus on anything but the pain and headed to the doctor. 

"I can't believe you created another human." Changbin muttered as he walked into the room with a look of surprise on his face,

"Neither can we," You laughed as you laid your head on Minho's shoulder still remembering the look of shock on his face he had when you told him that you were going to have a baby. It was as if someone had drained all the colour out of him and for a few moments you thought he was going to pass out but he took it well and spent hours shopping for everything you were going to need online and having it delivered to your apartment that you shared together.

CHANGBIN:

"Where have you been I've been calling all day?!" You yelled out as you stood in the doorway of one of the studios, Changbin was chilling with Jisung and Chan while he claimed he was working. 

"What's wrong? Is something wrong?" You groaned at his nagging questioning and looked down at your stomach, the bump was starting to bother you but you put that down to weight loss until about an hour ago when you felt something move inside of you followed by a gushing of water to your feet. 

"I'm in labour, so if you answered your phone I wouldn't have had to drive all the way here instead of a hospital," All three of the boys started to laugh with one another thinking it was some kind of prank but as soon as Changbin saw the seriousness on your face his smile fell to the floor. 

"You're really-"

"Yes."

"And I'm going to be dad-"

"Not if you don't get me to a fucking doctor!" You yelled out as another contraction hit you, bending over in pain as you tried not to fall to the floor in a puddle of tears from the pain that you were experiencing. 

HYUNJIN:

"Besides a little weight gain, there had been no other indication that you could have been pregnant?" A nurse asked as she looked at you at Hyunjin, the two of you had been surprised by home birth. You'd gotten up in the middle of the night to use the toilet only to realise you weren't in need of the toilet but a doctor. The two of you ended up delivering your daughter on the bathroom floor over the phone to nurses and an ambulance team that had been stuck on the roads. 

"No, I didn't even know I could. I was on the pill and we were using condoms." You mumbled as you glanced down at your sleeping daughter who was strong considering you hadn't been taking prenatal care or going for regular checkups, it was a miracle she was delivered as well as she was and as healthy as she was. 

"Well, the hospital will provide you with a crib and some emergency supplies but you will need to do some shopping soon." She began writing everything up that you would need, Hyunjin was already so taken with your daughter he could hardly take his eyes off her.

JISUNG:

As soon as the water hit the ground you knew you hadn't accidentally wet yourself and Chan knew from the look of it that it wasn't piss that had come out of you. 

"Y/n!?" Jisung yelled out as panic washed over his face, he was sweating as he rushed over to you, sitting you down on the sofa in the dorms as he began yelling out for someone to call an ambulance. 

"Relax, she's in labour," Chan said calmly as he watched the two of you but that did nothing to settle you, both you and Jisung turned to him with wide eyes, 

"I'M PREGNANT?!"

"SHE'S PREGNANT!?" You screamed out together as the boys around you began to laugh, Chan shook his head at you before looking around. 

"Felix call an ambulance, Seungmin get a blanket and Minho pack up some clothes for Y/n." The whole time Chan barked out orders Jisung was doing his best to coach you through the pain, giving you breathing techniques he'd seen in all of the movies and TV shows where people were giving birth.

"We're going to be parents." He whispered over and over again as if he was trying to convince himself that it was true and it wasn't some kind of dream that he seemed to be having. 

FELIX:

Felix brought you to the hospital as soon as you said that you were in so much pain you couldn't get out of bed, doctors were running tests on you while you sat in a hospital bed crying into a pillow. 

"Mr Lee, Miss Y/l/n?" You glanced over at the door to see a set of doctors all rushing around outside the door, getting something ready while another came to speak to you. 

"It appears that you're pregnant, in fact, you're currently in labour." You started laughing at the male doctor thinking it was some kind of joke but when you noticed he wasn't laughing you stopped and sat up in the bed. 

"I'm what?" Felix's hand wrapped around yours as he tightly squeezed your hand, come to think of it there was a high possibility that you were pregnant but the two of you had been careful and used protection all of the time. 

"I would assume this is a shock but we need to check to see how far along you are in your contractions," A female doctor came into the room and began introducing herself while you and Felix stared at one another dumbfounded about how this could have happened and when. 

"Would you like to stay in the room?" The mid-wife asked Felix who turned to leave but you gripped onto his shirt pulling him closer to the bed, 

"We're in this together, don't even think about walking out of that door." You warned him as the doctor began to see if you were ready to push or not, 

"Almost there, I would say another hour or two at the most," She smiled looking up at you both as you worriedly looked at one another how you were going to break the news to everyone since you had no idea you had been pregnant in the first place.

"I need to call my mum," Felix stuttered as he looked at you, you nodded your head looking around for your phone. 

"I need to tell my family." You bit down on your lip not knowing if you were excited, worried or scared or if it was a mixture of all of those emotions at once. 

"I would make some arrangements quickly," The doctor teased before leaving the room, you turned to Felix wondering where to start with the conversation.

SEUNGMIN:

"I'm telling you that there is nothing wrong with me, I just feel sick." You grumbled to Seungmin who was pacing around the room a nurse had placed you in, he'd insisting on taking you to see someone as soon as you started to feel sick and dizzy that morning and now you had been waiting around for hours. 

"The tests have all finally came back, we wanted to make sure it was 100% positive before we came in here," The same nurse that had admitted you explained as she held a clipboard to her chest with a worried expression on her face, 

"When you came in we asked if there was a chance of pregnancy and you said no-"

"Because there isn't, I'm on the pill and we use protection," You told her as she continued to give you a worried look, that was when she began showing you all of the tests that they had done to prove to you that you were eight months pregnant and in early labour which was why you were sick and in so much pain. 

"I-I'm pregnant?" You stuttered out staring from the charts to her face as Seungmin sat down on the chair beside your bed, 

"But we were careful," He mumbled as he looked at you, 

"Not all contraceptives are 100% effective, some are just 99.9% you're the lucky, 00.01% That gets pregnant," You knew she was trying to make you feel better but it only made it worse as you thought about how the baby had nothing waiting at home for them when you eventually got home. 

"I'll get the boys, they'll become builders for the day." Seungmin mumbled as he began to call Chan on his phone frantically. 

JEONGIN:

Jeongin laughed down the phone when you told him you were sitting on the maternity ward of a hospital delivering his baby but as soon as he didn't hear you laughing a chill ran through him.

"You're joking right?" You groaned at him through the phone, rolling your head back against the bed as another contraction hit you making you scream out louder than the rest before it.

"Why would I joke about pushing a watermelon out of something the size of a pea!?" You yelled out down the phone to him while the midwife flinched from beside you wondering how you had been clueless about the pregnancy in the first place. It wasn't as though you were trying to get pregnant you were only together for two years, he was still young and how was JYP going to react to him getting a son or a daughter. 

"Please come to the hospital innie, I'm scared," Your voice cracked as you began to cry but Jeongin was already on the way, getting Minho to drive him as fast as he could so he could be by your side by the time his son or daughter came into the world.

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