#but I’m super happy with how this animation turned out!! I’ve been working on it on and off for 3 months :D

[catamations]

Hihihihi I just returned from my year long YouTube hiatus and uploaded an experimental castoff AMV and thought I would share it on here! :D

The animation is mostly centered around Frankie since he’s my favorite! :] Even if you don’t know anything about castoff you’ll probably like the animation if you like my art :3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for making my partner feel bad about sex?

NSFW Warning for this one, tl;dr at bottom. Sent in May 26th, 2024, goat to locate later

🐐

I (23FtM) have been with my partner “Jake” (25M) for about seven months now. We met at work, were friends for a while, and decided to start dating after we realized we had feelings for each other

Please let me say that Jake is a good boyfriend. He takes me out, we share big purchases, our families get along, and he’s always been super supportive of me in the ways he can be. I would also like to say that I haven’t medically transitioned yet and very much do NOT pass as a man. Despite this, he’s never misgendered me and he’s always been really good about making me feel masculine.

So not long into our relationship, I disclosed to him that I have vaginismus (or whatever it’s called), and it means that I can’t really be on the receiving end of penetrative sex until I do some muscle therapy for my downstairs. Like it hurts when I try to insert anything into myself, always has since I was younger. No tampons, no fingers, especially no penises. Jake said this was fine and that he had confidence in his ability to make me feel good in other ways

Well… it’s been six months and I’ve never actually finished. He bought me a little rose toy to use, but he never grabs it while we’re intimate and when he does try to use it, he fumbles with it and decides not to use it and that me doing oral on him would just be easier. I can understand that for a quickie, we won’t have time to find what buttons to push that’ll make me finish, but most of the time we’re home alone, my roommates are out, and we’ve got all night.

And before anyone says anything: I have brought this up before. First time was what led him to buying the toy. It’s a good toy, I guess, but it does what my fingers would already do and he never takes the time to learn how to use it properly without hurting me. Second time I brought it up, he got really apologetic and asked me to use the toy while he touched himself next to me. I think that was the first time I finished in proximity to his body in our entire relationship. It didn’t feel good. Several friends pushed me to talk to him again, so I did.

I went to his place, Jake lives with his mom still, and I was trying to find a good place to talk to him, but he kept talking about work or his sisters or would turn on an anime that he knew I liked. The day ended with me giving him oral and then me going home. It almost seemed like he was going to reciprocate, but he hesitated and rolled off me. It really hurt my feelings, but I chickened out of telling him since he looked so happy to spend time with me.

Yesterday, he came over and I was finally able to squeeze in a joke about him being a “pillow princess” and his reaction was to get worked up and initiate sex to “prove” he wasn’t. It went the same as every other time - oral - him receiving, fumbling with toy, and then giving up. But he was smiling like he had done something revolutionary in our relationship and I just. Stared at him. He asked me what was wrong and I said hadn’t finished. He had a sad face now and said that there really wasn’t “much I can do while you’re, you know” while gesturing to my genitals.

I felt like crying, but I didn’t want to be the boyfriend who started crying over every little thing, so I just agreed with him and we cuddled until I drove him home. Before meeting Jake, sex was never a large part of any of my relationships. Half because I’m on the asexual spectrum, half because of my condition, so this would be my first serious sexual relationship. I love Jake, I love him so much, he was there for my when my mom passed away last year, and he was there for my college graduation.

On the drive back, he was really quiet so I asked him if he was alright. He said he was really hurt by my pillow Princess comment and asked me if I could take it back, that it made him feel like a bad boyfriend. I apologized for him feeling bad, but I didn’t outright take back what I said. He got out of my car still sad and I returned home feeling like k was gonna throw up.

So now I’m writing this to see if I fucked up. Maybe I should have been more assertive with my needs, maybe I should be more compromising so that everyone feels good. Idk.

TL;DR: I called my boyfriend a pillow Princess because he’s never made me finish during sex while I’m always serving him. He got upset and said I was calling him a bad boyfriend. Aita?

[jennifer-jeong]

haiii!! could I put in a request for boothill x an alcoholic engineer reader who’s personality takes a complete 180 when drunk? Like when sober they’re really quiet and a total introvert but when drunk they’re basically a party animal/super hype(the reason why they drink so much is because it helps them forget about their life problems like taxes and student loan debt, if I had to compare the reader’s personality to a character I’d say hiroi kikuri from bocchi the rock) but they’re like crazy smart when it comes to machines and stuff and even fixes up boothill from time to time

headcanons or a small fic is fine^^

HII I’M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG I’ve just been out of the groove of writing for a bit but your request is so cute and I wanted to take a shot at it. Thank you for your request and I hope you like it!

Fluff + Suggestive | Boothill x GN!Reader A Few Drinks

CONTENT Fluff, suggestive, him flirting with you, you flirting with him, getting handsy, alcohol consumption, pet name usage, no reader pronouns used, CHARACTERS ARE 18+

WORD COUNT: 1227

It was a regular Friday afternoon in your personal workshop situated in your home on a planet not far off from Penacony and easily accessible via space anchors. The planet was mostly made up of plains, your house sat near a pond and was surrounded by grass and your tiny gardens that you filled with flowers and succulents. You were an excellent engineer working both for corporations as well as taking on smaller private contracts/projects occasionally. You were currently working on a specific cyborg’s finger joint, putting the finishing touches on the cybernetics before he came to have it attached to his robotic body.

You heard a familiar clicking of boots against the sidewalk to your open workshop door before an equally familiar greeting from the cyborg cowboy.

“Heya sweetheart, how ya been? Hows my dumb fudging finger treatin ya?” he chirped, his voice slightly grainy and robotic due to a lack of organic vocal chords.

You swivel around in your chair, giving him a small smile. “Your pinky was pretty messed up but I managed,” you replied quietly, a little anxious talking to the -handsome- man you knew killed people on the daily.

“Ah, ya always fix me up fine and dandy, I knew you’d be able to help,” he said as he walked towards your workbench.

You gave him a small chuckle at the praise and turned around to grab the fixed finger. “Thanks… now just have a seat on the-” you were cut off by turning slightly and being met with his face awfully close to yours. He had leaned over your shoulder to take a closer look at your work, his hands held behind his back.

Your eyes widened as you froze for a moment, unintentionally staring at him before looking away. He was looking at your work but when you turned away he took the opportunity to scan over your flustered self, grinning slightly at how cute you were.

You always treated him so sweetly, disregarding what he did for work because you knew about his past. How could he not find you adorable?

He pulled away to walk towards the table that doubled as an operating table when he or your other clients needed bigger fixes.

“Here?” he says knowingly.

You nod quickly before grabbing a few tools and setting up to attach the part back to his synthetic nervous system.

It was a painful few minutes of him watching you intently as you worked. He was sitting up, leaning back on his right hand, legs spread as he got comfy. His left hand was propped up into a sleeve to keep it still as you worked on it. You tried hard to not look up at him despite knowing he was staring down at you the entire time, probably with that teasing grin he always wore around you.

Once you were done and he finished paying you (with a generous tip no less), he suddenly wondered what you’d be doing since the work week just ended.

“So, whadda ya doin after closin’ up shop today? Ya ever go out for Friday happy hour?”

You whipped your head around to him at the mention of drinking before looking down at the ground, hoping you didn’t seem too eager to talk about alcohol.

“Y-yeah, I go every weekend,” you replied.

He raised an eyebrow and chuckled, “really? Ya didn’t really strike me as the drinkin’ type darlin’.”

You swallowed at his use of pet name.

“Yeah… it helps me get my mind off work and shit,” you shared with him, figuring it was fine to tell him about it since you already started to get to know each other pretty well during his visits. It was hard to explain, but you trusted him.

“Huh… Well, let’s fudgin’ go then!” He says, jumping off the table. “Lemme know when ya ready darlin”.”

“W-whoa there darlin’” Boothill says for the nth time after you two got to a vintage looking club in the city. You were stumbling a bit as he tried to prevent you from knocking anything over or getting yourself hurt. You kept bumping into him, grabbing onto his arms or his chest to stabilize yourself.

It was your turn to fluster the man.

After all the times he’d made you shy and bashful, him feeling your hands all over him in this context and not during some sort of repair procedure was really setting off his sensors.

You giggled in your drunken state and dragged him by his hand to the crowded dance floor. The current song was just ending and you heard the first few beats of one of your favorite songs. The crowd clearly also liked the song as you all started getting hyped. You started jumping and dancing in front of him as you held his shoulders. You even grabbed the attention of some nearby girls as they encouraged you and you did the same to them.

Boothill’s expression slowly morphed from curious shock to an endearing smirk as he laughed at your total 180 shift in personality as soon as you had a few drinks. His hands found your hips as you continued to dance all over him while he moved with the rhythm.

It was also in this moment that he realized exactly what you were wearing too, it was a pretty, skin tight top and ripped shorts, completely different from the baggy overalls and t-shirt you usually wore in the workshop.

He felt his body’s cooling system kick in a bit harder.

You noticed his eyes on you as you always did, but this time, with alcohol in your system, you decided to do something about it.

You pushed him into a nearby bar stool, forcing him to sit down and lean against the bar counter. You stood between his legs, hands on his chest as you leaned towards his face.

“Thanks for coming out with me Bootie~” you said with your eyes lidded, batting your eyelashes at him. His breath hitched at the sudden nickname usage that you’ve call him by before.

“I’ve been stressed about shit recently but this is fun” you giggle, “we should do it more often,” you add, looking him up and down, something he doesn’t miss.

He relaxes slightly, hands finding their place on your waist again as his signature grin comes out. You could tell he was still pretty flustered though, he was into it, but still a bit shy.

“You’re always looking at me like that, Bootie,” you say as you trace a finger on the underside of his jaw, making him look at you. “I don’t say it when I’m not drunk… but I hope y’know I don’t mind it,” you say with a smile and lidded eyes. Your finger trails off the bottom of his chin as he ever so slightly chases your touch.

You giggle again at his reactions to you, feeling a bit giddy knowing that he was as into you as you were into him.

You push off him to run back to the dance floor, calling out to him with the nickname you just gave him.

The cowboy adjusts his hat before blinking a few times, smiling, and exhaling the breath he didn’t know he was holding.

He follows you back to the dance floor as he thinks “I’m fudged.”

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[autumn-doodles]

Thumbnail for my upcoming animatic!

The animation be up on my YT on July 24th so save the date :D

Usually I don’t like to set myself deadlines but in the interest of publicity I thought it’d be easier for people to have a solid release date, I’m super excited to get this done I’ve been working on it for over a month now and I’m super happy with how it’s turning out

Any interactions are much appreciated!

[keys-hellscape-1020]

Gaz Headcannons

Damn y’all, sorry for disappearing for six months. I’ve been in and out of the mental hospital like a yo-yo, so uh, have some headcannons to make up for it ig.

SFW

Tw: Cursing, brief mentions of violence, (very brief) sexual themes.

I picture him as a night owl, but that doesn’t mean he likes sleeping in super late. He likes some structure in his day (a side-effect of being in the military) and if he’s not out of bed by 9 he starts to feel guilty, like he’s wasting the day.

Despite me saying he’s a night owl, he’s not truly a night owl so much as he just gets so absorbed in what he’s doing he looses track of time and next thing he knows it’s 2am.

From an outside perspective it would be easy to assume he has more trauma than the rest of the 141- but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. He probably has the same amount for the most part, he’s just the only one who handles it in a healthy way. He’ll reach out for help if he needs it, has a therapist he sees regularly, and takes a low-dose of anti-anxiety medication (I want to say Zoloft cause that’s what I’m on lol). All said, he’s the only one who actually acknowledges it and doesn’t pretend it’s not there.

This man definitely games. He might play a first person shooter here and there, but honestly I don’t think he’d like them, they remind him to much of work and in his free time that’s the last thing he wants to be reminded of. I can see him playing Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, and Graveyard Keeper (it’s not well known but it’s SO good). The grim themes while still managing to be a cozy game really appeal to him.

His perfect date is you two ordering take-out and eating it on the couch while you play games together. He just absolutely adores being in your presence.

Despite this, quality time is not his main love language (although it is a close second). His first is words of affirmation. He loves how you get flushed and turn away from him when he compliments you out of nowhere. Literally you could just be in the same room, not even interacting, and this man would out of nowhere be like “You’re so fucking gorgeous. It’s a miracle I don’t drop to my knees every time you enter a room.” And then just causally go back to what he was doing.

On that note! This man is so into body worship. Just let him kiss, and lick, and suck, on you to his heart’s content and you will have one happy Gaz.

Also he just adores showing you off. He likes staying home sure, but he also likes taking you out on date nights and flaunting you (respectfully). He’s just so very proud to be in a relationship with you.

On the theme of bars, if someone gets close to you or touches you without your permission, this man is watching. He won’t say or do anything, he’ll just silently watch the person’s behavior. His years in the military have made him very good at reading people.

If he sees that they’re getting closer than you want, or otherwise making you uncomfortable, he’ll suddenly get very close to you. He won’t outright say anything, he knows you can handle yourself, but he’ll rest a hand on your shoulder. Both telling you that he’s there if you need him, and the creep to watch themselves.

If they back off without him having to intervene, great, you both can go back to enjoying yourselves, if he does need to get involved gods help the person his aggression is aimed towards.

He’ll take a few steps towards them, subtly growling (you know that one scene with price? Yeah that). He’ll tell them to back off, that you’re obviously not enjoying the conversation. If words don’t work, he won’t hesitate to resort to a fist fight. He won’t land the first hit however, he knows better. He might not be as physically strong as Ghost or Price, but this man has technique, and his opponent is knocked out in an heartbeat.

After that he is all over you, asking you if you’re alright, if you want to go home, etc. Whatever you need or want will be provided. He isn’t feeling jealous in that moment, just concerned. He wants to make sure you’re okay more than anything. After the fact, when he thinks back on it, he may feel a spark of jealousy, but it’s nothing he can’t quickly and easily reason away. After all, he trusts you completely.

NSFW

Tw: Body worship, nipple play (but no mention of breasts), biting, mentions of BDSM (in general), choking, slapping, Praise kink, minor degradation, quickies, aftercare

As mentioned earlier this man is the king, of body worship. He’ll work you up slowly, sensually. Kissing, licking, and teasing every inch of you before he even thinks of touching in-between your legs.

Your nipples will be sore by the time this man is done with them. He’s just enthralled by them, watching them get hard at he pinches and bites.

Speaking of bites, it’s not just your nipples. Afterwards you’ll find plenty of dark bite marks on your chest, neck, waist, and inner thighs. The feeling of your flesh under his teeth is just… exquisite.

Yes this man may be a tad bit… nippy, but he isn’t into anything that would truly hurt you. The farthest he would go would be choking you (after a long conversation and plenty of research), or a quick slap or two to your ass.

He also mixes degradation and praise together beautifully. Things like “such a beautiful little slut for me.” And “Damn, you’re such a good little whore.” He’ll sprinkle in a healthy bit of praise to. His main priority is your pleasure after all. <3

While he isn’t opposed to aspects of BDSM, I can’t see him being interested in the strict dynamics side of it, at all. Yeah sure he enjoys doming and subbing but I can’t see him wanting to bring them outside of the bedroom. And even in the bedroom, there’s no strict rules. He just wants to have fun with it, and he wants you to as well.

He isn’t opposed to quickies. He doesn’t partake in them often as I see him having a sex drive that is average to low. But if you both need to be somewhere soon and you just have to have him? He’ll get on his knees and make sure that yours are wobbling as you walk out to the car. Don’t worry about him darling, you can make it up to him later. Like I said, your pleasure is his priority.

When all is said and done this man takes very good care of you. He’ll insist on a shower or bath together (depending on if you can stand or not). He seriously enjoys taking a bath with you afterwards though. He’ll run a bath that is steaming hot, “To relax your muscles” he says. He’ll also add some lavender and sandalwood oil to the water, to relax and ground you.

He’ll take such good care of you. If your hair needs washed he’ll give you the best scalp massage you’ve ever had. If it doesn’t (or you just don’t want him to) he’ll put it in a remarkably neat bun on the top of your head so it doesn’t get wet. And if you don’t have a lot of hair/no hair? You’ll still get a scalp massage. It doesn’t matter how little hair you have, this man is rubbing shampoo into your scalp claiming “It helps keep you clean!” Just let him take care of you please.

After he’s dealt with your hair he’ll lather up a rag with a generous amount of soap and take his time gently cleaning off every part of you. He won’t ask you to, but his heart will melt if you return the favor and wash his body clean.

After you both are clean he’ll take his time drying you off with the fluffiest towel he can find. This man knows your skincare routine by heart and WILL make sure every step gets done in the correct order. Once you’re all clean and dry he gives you some of his clothes to wear. And you know this man wears oversized clothes when he’s off duty for the sole purpose of making sure they fit you.

If you’re hungry he’ll order your favorite take-out, if your not he’ll still insist you eat a granola bar and drink some water. You burned a lot of calories and sweat a lot! You need fuel!

If you’re somehow still awake after all this he’ll gently pick you up and bring and you to bed. Falling asleep in this man’s arms is a dream come true. <3

A/N: I’ve never written any kind of smut before, so constructive criticism is very welcome. I got kinda out of control with the aftercare part. I had to stop myself. Plz let me know if you enjoyed!!

[liquidstar]

do u have any recs for folks newer to the yuri genre? I've never really read any manga other than shounen and some magical girl stuff

Omg i can totally give yuri recs. (And which ones to stay away from. Sakura Kiss has cousin shit in it, Citrus has stepsister dubcon, Dragon Maid has lolicon, Happy Sugar Life is also lolicon but it’s edgy about it and tries to act like this makes it deep, we can do better)

Anyway here’s my actual recs! I'm going to give details but if you don't wanna read them I bolded all the titles.

YuriKuma Arashi (By Ikuhara of Revolutionary Girl Utena fame), is about lesbian bears. But it’s actually a metaphor for the simultaneous objectification and demonization of lesbians, the expectation both for purity and predation. There are some nitpicks I have with it like the sexualization being a bit too much to bring the point home, but overall I do like its themes and its message. And I think the ending pulls everything together really nicely. There is both a manga and an anime, and I believe the anime came first. I’ve only seen the anime so I’m not sure if/how the manga deviates!!!! 

Bloom Into You is an absolute must. Like, for real, I think it’s one of the best romances out there, yuri or otherwise. It gets really deep into both characters' respective psyches and the ways that they’re both Very Screwed Up when it comes to love and romance, or really just life in general. Giving details would be doing them a disservice honestly. Both characters are very messy but also do try their best to genuinely communicate, and what comes of that is a lot of teenage lesbian drama, but the growth they both experience though it TOGETHER is just great, and you can tell they care about each other so much.

Okay this one I’m not really recommending for the good writing, it’s more-so just really cool. Liberta (EXPLICIT) is a series about a vampire who can turn her body into guns and a human woman who is sick of being seen as lesser in her ordinary life. And then they fall in love and are vampires together. The artstyle and character designs are awesome and it has some really cool fight scenes. However it also has full blown barely censored sex scenes. A few of them. One of the women uses her tail at some point. If that’s not what your cup of tea is, give it a pass. 

Anyway for something more wholesome you should check out The Guy She Was Interested in Wasn't a Guy at All, which I’m actually not fully caught up on bc life, but has still been a super fun read so far. It’s about a girl who works at a music store, and her classmate who gets a crush on her while she’s at work. The classmate doesn’t realize that they’re the same person, due to her looking different at work, and thinks her worksona is a guy. Hijinks ensue. 

Otherside Picnic is also highly recommended. Its manga adaptation is lagging behind the light novel, which I can’t find a translation of online (But if anyone can help me out w that 🙏). The story itself is about two college students who go on adventures to a parallel plane of reality, which contains cosmic horrors who can only communicate with humans through fear so intense it will make you go insane. They’re also looking for someone who went missing, and gain cool powers like Ghost Hand and Sans Eye. Yes this is still a yuri series and it’s also really really extremely fucking cool. 

She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat, is a slice of life story about… Well exactly what it says. A woman with a passion for cooking, making lots of food and sharing it with her neighbor, and they end up bonding through this. It’s also like, cool to see a big butch woman for a change! The story itself is very straightforward but I love watching the relationship progress as well as the mc question her sexuality. This story will absolutely make you super hungry though.

Show Me Your Bust (EXPLICIT) is also exactly what it says on the tin, though it’s technically a webtoon. Again this is a series with explicit sex scenes, but it actually does have a story and actual depth to its characters. Honestly there’s a lot to unpack with all of them and a lot of the relationships aren’t totally healthy but it’s a drama so that’s the point. 

A Monster Wants To Eat Me is actually hard to describe without spoilers. It’s about a girl who lives by the sea, meeting a mysterious girl with eyes that remind her of the ocean itself. The girl says that she’s actually been looking for the mc for a long time, and it’s revealed that….

And lastly I wanna mention Hanamonogatari, a story about an old widow who begins to regain confidence in herself as she experiments with make-up with the help of another old lady who works at a local cosmetic store. Honestly it’s very very very sweet, it’s rare to get romances like this of old women when so much of the focus of romances (yuri or otherwise) is often on the characters being attractive. I also really appreciate how the make-up is being used specifically to accentuate their wrinkles. Not hide them. Because aging is beautiful too. Sadly IVE ONLY READ TWO CHAPTERS BECAUSE I DONT THINK THE REST ARE TRANSLATED IF ANYONE OUT THERE CAN HELP ME PLEASE DO 🙏

[vinnoa-articles]

Embers

[Image by Eiichiro Oda]

Rating: +18, you have been warned. If you are a minor, leave now.

Word count: 4,385

Type: Smut

Characters: reader (AFAB), Sabo, Portgas D. Ace, Luffy, Garp, Eustass Kid (mentioned), Crocodile (mentioned), Marco (mentioned)

Trigger warnings/content: Sex, first time, some talk of gay sex, swearing, babygirl nickname

Notes: Sabo, Ace and Luffy are not actual related brothers, but they are super close friends. Garp is essentially a guardian of these three. Crocodile is an antagonist in ONE PIECE, and Marco is actually a crewmember of Ace's. Thought it would be interesting to put some familiar names in the anime into here. Eustass Kid is just another pirate in ONE PIECE. Just another detail. Sorry its so long!

The rustling of trees, the cracked open window letting in the night breeze, the young blond man climbed down finally as his toes touched the cracked pavement. His scar over his right eye couldn't cover his twinkling happy eyes. Tight black washed out skinny jeans with a hole over his right knee, with his ankle high combat boots to offset his loose white t-shirt. There was something so tantalizing at the sight of such a rebellious boy, waving outside the window. Small droplets of rain starting to fall and make his labrador hair cling to his cheeks. He was the cute one, of course, though it was a secret from one of his brothers, the other brother knew. Waving at the cute figure in the window, he knew that this worked. His charm is what he read in novels, and this was the only time he put this little show on. She waved back, which made him grin ear-to-ear, as he felt the cold drops fall on his hot cheeks. Keeping eye contact as he started to run in the rain, right where he needed to go. The sight of the female in the window disappeared behind a tree he ran past, as the sky turned a dark ash, rain pouring above from the sky. There was a slight buzz coming from his pocket; a new message most likely. Whisking out his small phone, and letting the blue light hit his eyes, he saw the simple message. 

[5:48PM Come back, I miss you already.]

Zig-zagging through the nearest park to reach a huge tree that had a rope hanging off a branch, and above that, a tree house with a small emanating orange glow. That could only mean one thing, someone was already at the hideout. The blond grasped the rope, trying to get a tight grip, as someone above must have heard his footsteps approach, opening the hatch on the floor of the tree house to pull him in.

“Hey yo Sabo!” The brother with a loose tank chuckled, raising his eyebrow. Sabo crawled up and closed the hatch, placing the small rug on top of it so no one would trip over the hinges. Wrinkling his nose and leaning back against a small box, as Sabo started to peel off his shirt to wring it out the window. “Dude, so did you finally get to fuck her or something? I’ve been waiting here, ya know?” Shaking his head, the scar on his face shined a little bit brighter, as if it was doing all the talking.

“Ace, you can’t just ask something like that,” Sabo shook his head to get as much of the water droplets off his locks. “Besides, we only got to step one,” smirking from ear-to-ear, his ears turning a slight pink as it peeked out from the yellow wet strands. “I’m not like you that goes to phase, what, eight and just goes straight into fucking.” Ace merely put his hands up in the air to shrug, defeated almost by the truth.

“Hey man, sorry that I got game. Besides, I know how she is. A tender soft ember really,” Ace cocking his neck back and forth to stretch out his neck muscles. “I have no idea how to woo a lady, honestly,” reaching behind him to grab the pillow he was leaning on to nearly throw at Sabo. Sabo reached to grab a pillow near him, defending himself, only for Ace to grasp the pillow and hug it into his lithe. “So, what happened? Unless you did fuck after god knows how many months of you dating, then good-”

“We didn’t!” Throwing the pillow straight towards his slightly younger brother’s face. There was only a chuckle muffled by a pillow. Sabo didn’t want to acknowledge Ace’s game, especially with how frequent Ace goes on one-night-stands. College was over for both of them, and it was just summer time as they kind of caused mischief all around the city. “What’s it to you anyway? You aren’t interested in women.”

“You know me too well!” The freckled boy sat up straight smiling. “That’s because I fucked him, and still had enough time to come here and wait for your slow ass.” It was kind of ridiculous how many men Ace roped in though. His smile was charming, and it made anyone swoon for him. The main perk, however, was his body that even he was envious of. Sun-kissed skin from the Gods, abs that pulsed when he breathed, his shoulders and collar decorated in small galaxies of freckles, with his fine raven locks flowing behind him when he rode the waves on his surfboard. “My date went well, of course, he had to beg me to let him enter me. I am just too good bro. Can’t complain about that Crocodile.” Sabo pouted as he took off each boot and placed it beside him. There was no way that such a wild-cannon of a man was capable of getting this many dates. 

“I bet you any money you paid him to have sex with you,” trying to rile up the fire child himself. Ace nearly stood up, cracking his knuckles.

“Oh you wanna bet on that scar face?” Sabo quickly grabbed his metal pipe that was leaned up against the table as he stood ready. 

“Oi! What are you guys talking about?” Both their heads turn to see their youngest brother, his shit-eating grin with his little straw hat staying right near the back of his neck, as the small string kept it anchored around his neck, his red little vest hugging his small frame with his navy blue shorts soaked from the rain. “Fight? Are we fighting now?” Sabo and Ace blinked, looking at each other, then at the young boy in the window.

“Luffy?!” Both of them nearly screamed as the youngest flopped into the tree house. His sandals slipped off his feet as he laughed on the floor. “How did you even get up here?” Ace pointed, as he stood over the rug. The boy in red chuckled his typical joyous laugh and lied on the floor.

“I climbed!”

“With what?”

“My arms!” The older two brothers sigh, but it was nothing too surprising. If Sabo thought Ace was the most loose-cannon, Luffy, the youngest, was definitely the most reckless and unpredictable. Always the one getting them in trouble with their guardian, Garp, was always the way of life with Luffy.

“Of fucking course, you did, buddy,” Ace smiled then plopped right back on the floor. “How did summer school go today?” The smiles disappeared immediately, replaced with an angry frown. Sabo already knew what was coming but wanted to hear the normal lore of summer school anyway.

“Ah! Fuck school! It’s so damn boring!” Kicking his legs around to emphasize his frustration. Ace only could laugh, trying not to laugh at the youngest’s pain but it was the same issue everyday.

“Wow, that’s new. No fight-”

“But, I fought with Eustass again. Freaking picking on me and shit, whooped his damn ass that loser” pouting towards the end. There was a groan from the fireboy, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Again Luffy? You know Garp is going to beat your ass when he finds out,” his hand covering his face in secondhand embarrassment. They all knew what was going to happen if Garp were to find out how rebellious the young teens were being at this point in life. Sabo was always doing fine on his tests, and he studied well. There were just some rules that were just straight up stupid. Such as chewing gum in school, or playing cards, or heck, wearing his hat; that may or may not obscure everyone’s view of the blackboard in the front of the class. So of course he is going to draw some questionable things on each and every blackboard, something funny that the teachers don’t approve of. He was called the “Revolutionary Army” for a reason. Then there was Ace, who nearly got away with everything he did, well, nearly. Never studying, skipping class, putting his boots up on his desk as the teacher scolds him to put his feet down. Of course, he didn’t care, because even after class, he would have some other guy being bent over the same desk, letting him teach the lesson on that table. He relished in that thought, so of course it was his desk. Then there was Luffy, the one that just struggled to understand his lessons, and that school is not where you fight. Even his friends would let him know.

“Gah! Who cares! I am done with summer school. I wanna hang out with you guys before college starts for you all!” Ace smiled in approval, encouraging his little brother’s behavior of ditching. Sabo would be lying if he was going to say he didn’t approve of his sibling’s actions, but then again, he was no better. “So what are you talking about?”

“Men”

“Women”

Luffy stared at the both of them, confused. “Huh? That you wanna fight? Cause these fists are rated E for everyone!”

“No bruv, we mean for fuck-” Ace stopped short as Sabo interupted Ace from potentially furthering the rebelliousness of Luffy. 

“What he means is someone you love,” Sabo glaring at Ace. Luffy was still three years younger than the two of them; Sabo only being 3 months older than Ace and always holding it above him during small banters, he still wanted Ace to at least be a pure boy. Afterall, his so-called “Strawhat Crew” already had a pervert or two…or more so they could tell him when he was ready. “But I just am not getting anywhere with this person,” the blond rolled his eyes. The process was so slow. The perfect gal in his eyes. Of course he only kissed her forehead when he snuck into her apartment and gave her his number on a small post-it note. He thought she was much more wild, as this girl was much more talkative from what it seemed at school; or maybe it's because she was with friends. Regardless, he was infatuated. She always stood up in math class to do math in a different way than what the teachers taught. Always going to the extreme end in class to prove that there are multiple ways of doing things, leaving the teachers flustered and scolding her to “do it our way, because that is what the whole lesson is asking for.”

“Ace, you have a lover?” Luffy scratched his head. “Is that why you always smell so nice every time you leave that hug from those guys you try to bring to the house.”

“You WHAT?!” Grabbing his pipe again, there was no way Ace was trying to bring his little toys here, it was a sacred ground.

“Woah woah woah, easy there. He means our house, not our small getaway up here,” Ace putting his hands up to signal he was unarmed, innocent, and definitely telling the truth. “B-besides Luffy, those are just a one-time friend that I might bring around. Maybe twice, so don’t worry bruv.” The smallest pondered and just smiled, winking at Ace and giving him a thumbs up.

“Oh! I see! So THAT is why in your room you two were hugging against the wall and you were saying his name. Close friends!” There was no freaking way, Ace left his damn door unlocked, again. The first time was when he, himself, walked in on his older tutor, Marco just ramming into Ace on the bed. Feral, moaning and groaning. All Sabo wanted to do was beat both of them up, but Ace pleaded and begged not for his brother to rat him out to Garp. Which is when Sabo confirmed Ace was not straight, despite all the small jokes that Ace would just drop randomly around him. Now, it was poor Luffy seeing god-knows-who screwing around in the forbidden love chamber.

“A.C.E-” Ace was sweating now, shaking a little as his smile trembled as he tried to talk, well, straight.

“Listen! Technically, Luffy has the key to my room so it’s not really my fault, ya know?” He was right though, if he locked his door, then of course if Luffy unlocked it to ask for something, he wouldn’t make a peep if he saw his brother preoccupied. Luffy knows firsthand that any friend that needs a small hug or bonding needs some space. “Anyway,” Ace’s freckles moved as he coughed to clear the air. “I think you should go back there tonight. I saw the look on her face when-”

“You are also stalking me now, you twink?!” There was no way in hell Ace was this insanely good. If only Sabo had the strength to beat his ass for everything that happened. “There is no way in hell, if you think I am just going to dive in and just show her what I want.” The “revolutionist” had his mind clouded like the current weather. This person was tender, soft, and allowed him to even get as close as he did. 

“Why don’t you go slow and see what she does? React when she does something?” All heads turn to the highschool student who is just picking at the small carpet hairs that are loose, seeing how many he could find. “I mean, you are smart Sabo. Smarter than all of us. I think you’ll figure it out.” For once, though Luffy is not dumb by any means, he is just a little sheltered and very pure. “Why are you guys looking at me?” Ace laughed a little then nodded.

“For once I have to agree with our little brother here. You are the most level-headed, but…” his face getting closer to Sabo. His scar twitched as the tan boy got close to his ear and whispered, “I had a little bird tell me she is not as innocent minded as you think. Take it from me.” There it was. He could feel his own face feel hot, his legs still wet from his skinny jeans he refused to pluck off. It was getting dark outside, and if he didn’t leave now, he wouldn’t have the chance since he has to help out with his little click in about two or three days, going on a small trip to just cause a little chaos with the cops this time. Snatching his things, he pulls the carpet off the hatch, which nearly sends poor Luffy flying as he was still pulling the loose hairs out of the darn thing. The wood scraped against each other, the hole opened right near his toes as he gave a quick thumbs up to his brothers, signaling that he was going to move, along with the unspoken code of;

“Yeah we won’t tell Garp!”

“We will let Garp know you’ll be home late!”

Which was shortly followed by a quick slap behind the youngest’s head. Luffy was a funny one, but he was right. The rain was still coming down, but it didn’t matter, the smell of fresh rain was enticing from what he read in books. Running out of the park and back to the dark backyard. Seeing the missing spots of moss that were on the bricks where he had already climbed before, up the wall and lifting up the window in one swift movement as it closed all the way as it were. The room was lit, but with a single candle. There was but not a single sound, but just a pair of eyes that just greeted him in both awe and horror. Whoops, forgot to let her know he thought. She sat leaning against her bed frame on the floor, book in hand, gawking at the wet footsteps that were leading right up to her, where he previously walked, and now again, ending at the same finish line as he did earlier today. Though Sabo is not as buff as Ace, he was definitely not scrawny neither, better yet, he was taller than him.

“I am back at your calling,” kneeling on his exposed knee, his hand cupping her jaw. His hands were still wet, but his musk, fresh cut grass, and the smell of rain wafted in the air. She closed her eyes, he waited as her lips slightly parted, her head turning as he met his lips with hers. Pulling away to see her reaction. 

“Was not expecting you so late,” her words were soft with nature’s song pitter-patter the foggy glass. Y/N’s arms wrapped around his neck, her head leaning up to kiss him again, this time eager for more. This is what she had been waiting for, for months. He didn’t realize how much she waited and waited for a simple kiss, scared that it would go too far. He did, however, know because whenever his face did get close to hers, he would always go past and whisper in her ear, or pluck off a loose strand of hair off her clothes or shoulder. Her response was always hitting him lightly on the shoulder, always playing it off as “a missed opportunity to kiss a fellow rebel of the school.” He was always good at reading body language, especially with how he could feel her heat radiating off of her and onto him. Her breathing, her pulse was rippling through him as their lips locked in place. Soft tender kisses only fueled this little ember her flames, as she started to pull away to place kisses on his jaw, to turn back to pay attention to his lips. Sabo turned his body, glancing a little to make sure he was in the correct position to lift her up bridal style and as softly as possible place her on the bed. Y/N clinging onto Sabo with trust, but not harshly. His body started to lean forward as they still kissed, clearly past the kissing mark that he only intended on doing today to further tease her. Y/N’s need was further shown as she let go, but grabbed onto his collar with one hand, nearly toppling on top of her frame, right knee in between her thighs. His eyes darted around to make sure there were no accidental touches on her body, elbow propping hims up so it was the perfect height to look at her alluring eyes. Her eyes shined his reflection back at him, he could see his own excitement within her pupils. Leaning down, his lips hovered above hers, trying to be tender to ease her excitement just a tad. Sabo knew it was slow, especially when her other hand was running through his hair and grasping it to push him deeper into the kiss. His one arm propping him up on the bed, his left hand snaked up under Y/N’s black shirt and onto her hip, rubbing small circles and giving a gentle squeeze to let his cold wet hands get warmed up by this cute little “ember” of his. Her body tensed, but his hand went up to feel the softness of her waist, gently kneading it between his palm and thumb to get a signal if she was ready. Small mewls trickled out of her lips and onto his tongue. To pull away slightly to give a little distance, but their noses touch, as his right hand crept up to place a finger over her lips, his elbow sliding up near her shoulder to hush her a little.

“This is a girl’s only dorm, right? We can’t get you kicked out of the dorm before college starts, right baby girl?” Her body rippled with a few shakes, he could tell she was excited, but it was well past the time to be loud, to be Ace loud anyway. “Good job,” his mouth went back, but this time, his tongue explored her mouth to get to know her small little world. The hand on the waist crept up onto her peak that was covered by her bra, gently squeezing it to only feel her tongue jolt from the pleasure. Sabo was finally grateful towards highschool for making them read books that are “classics”, but really they were erotica if they really thought long and hard about it. The shifting on the bed made him pause to look down, her fingers had pushed down her pajama pants and underwear past her core, but just below it to test the waters. Gently, the hand on her valley, went to her sea, wet so that his fingers could take a deep plunge. He was ready to play the long game, unlike his brother and he knew it would mean more in the end anyway. Hand cupping her waters, his fingers dipped in, her moan almost fully out but her hand covering her swollen lips. Only one finger, all the way until his knuckle was still poking out. Curling his fingers so softly, to see where that sweet treasure was underneath it all, when her knees bent together to grab at his leg. There it was, as he pulled out his finger, he inserted his middle finger, doing the same, but he could tell Y/N was on the brink of cumming. Her walls were shaking, pulsating, hugging his fingers as if calling them to go deeper and to stay. 

“S…Sabo,” her voice trembled. Dragging out his fingers, she could feel the fingers leave, almost whining at the lack of presence within her. Those skilled fingers, digging into his wallet to grab a condom that Ace had always preached would be of good use, which was a blessing and a curse. Tearing the condom and letting Y/N catch a breath, standing up just to pry off his pants to his ankles, kicking his combat boots that he never even bothered tying up again when he left the treehouse to the side with his pants off, but his boxers still on. Sabo adjusted himself, leaning again, close to Y/N’s face, whispering in her ear so quietly, that the rain almost was interrupting their lesson.

“Oh baby, just don’t be too tense for me, I don’t want it to hurt for you love,” his voice cooing in her ear made her dripping pussy shake as if it heard it all. Gently pushing his boxers down, and rolling on the condom on his throbbing cock, he rubbed it against her lower lips. His body eclipsing hers, as he slowly welcomed the warmth around him. 

“Ah!” Her mouth parted, but he was too slow groaning himself. This is what Ace was all crazy about, and he understood. Back in the original position he was in, he started to kiss her lips to quiet her down, pushing his length as deep as it would go, her throat swallowing to try and stop her sinful moans.

“I’m going to move now, does it hurt?” Words like feathers tickled her ears as she shook her head, tears slowly creeping up in her eyes. Ah, so it is her first time too. “It’s okay baby girl, I’ll go slow”. His hips went slow, making sure she could adjust to a little movement, her small voice nearly being swallowed by his long kisses. Until after a few moments, they stopped making out entirely. Sabo’s hair touched the bed as his pants were breathed onto her ear, her teeth biting on his shoulder to try to muffle the pleasure, but it was too late. The sound of skin slapping each other, his balls hitting her thighs, his hands gripping the sheets around their bodies as her hands scratched little trails on his back. “Fuck, I am cumming baby,” his hips snapping in precision to hit that one sweet spot of hers. Her teeth sunk in as her legs wrapped around his body, a wave going through her body, as it calmed as he rode out her wave. Groaning deep as he released his seed in the wrapper. Both huffing and puffing as his body collapsed beside her, looking at the sheets with droplets of red beneath her body. Lifting her body up and onto her study chair, he switched out the bed sheets with new light blue sheets, lying her down on top without even trying to put the top sheet properly on the bed. Climbing bed to wrap his lean arms around her, planting a kiss on her forehead, smiling. 

“Love you Sabo,” her soft voice returned to normal as she pecked Sabo’s neck. Stroking her dry locks, he pulled her close into his chest, as his eyes drifted off into sleep.

He woke up a lot earlier, because he didn’t want to get chewed out, as he saw Y/N sleeping quietly as the sheets moved up and down to her breathing patterns. Tossing the old sheets in the hamper, he put on his still damp clothes, tying his boots finally and opened the window. “Hm? Sabo?” Sabo turned his head only to see Y/N sleeping, her body curled up hugging the pillow replacing his body. A smile creeping onto his lips as if he saw something he could tease her about later, his feet dangling as he hopped out the building. The window shutting as he landed. There was no silhouette this time, but he knew he would see that figure again one day. Whipping out his phone he saw he missed seven calls and had a bunch of text messages.

[10:12PM Gah! Sorry! - Little Luffy]

[10:09PM Get your ass back here! Blame Luffy for this shit. Now I am in trouble - Hothead Ace]

Only to see one message at the very bottom saying words that prompted Sabo to maybe sleep in the treehouse that night.

[9:58PM You better get your ass back here brat!! Breaking curfew and chasing girls is NOT what you should be doing. Be back here by 10:15PM or else I’m beating your ass - Angry Carpy Garp]

Well, it was already 11:24PM, but it didn’t matter if he got caught in the tree house anyway, because he ignited a fire with himself. It was worth every beating he would get when he came back with a smile on his face.

[elbarkla]

Check it out everyone, 3 years of art progress! And I wrote a guide for beginners! 😊

Hi! I’m Laura, age 31. I’ve always drawn occasionally, but never really stuck with it. Frankly it stressed me out. I’d draw for a month, then cry a bunch, then quit for a couple more years. But this time I turned it into a habit somehow. I’ve been drawing near-daily since Feb ‘21 and my life is better for it. Art’s a huge part of me now; it affects how I spend my time, how I express myself, and how I see the world. I feel like a happier, more complete human being.

So here’s what worked for me. This is a guide for hobbyists (I don’t have commercial ambitions) and it may or may not work for you. But I hope you can learn something from it regardless. Without further ado, my thesis:

 ~ Laura’s Steps for Drawing A Lot and Hopefully Getting Better ~

 1 – Manage Your Health 

Know what’s bad for your art? Depression! Glad I got around to treating mine. But for real, if you lack self-confidence you might want to check your mental health. It isn’t the sole factor but it can rapidly overtake the others. Every day I see a post like “how do I improve, every time I try to draw I’m overwhelmed with thoughts I’m bad at everything and a burden to the people around me”. That’s relatable but not a healthy way to see yourself. Low self-esteem can be treated. Please consider talking to someone - you’re a wonderful, lovable person and deserve a happy life.

Also, try to get plenty of sleep and eat regular meals; it helps with everything. Exercise is worth a shot too. Going for walks is good for your mind and body. Yes it’s boring, but boredom gives you space to imagine things.

 #2 – Make It Fun

You’re taking this too seriously. Yes, you. It’s just a hobby. Take the pressure off. Have fun.

What does that mean? It means you need to make art approachable. It has to be a comfort hobby you’re naturally drawn to. That means killing all thoughts of what you SHOULD do. If it makes you want to draw, go for it. Anime characters? Pretty ladies? Fanart? Furries? Doodles from imagination? Zentangles? Pencils? Digital? Do it. If drawing the “right way” burns you out, draw things the wrong way instead. You know who draws a lot? Children. You know who doesn’t draw super well? Children. Have that mindset. Draw like a child. Don’t compare yourself to others; just enjoy the process of creating something. You had that ability once and I know you can reacquire it.

 Intimidated by an empty sketchbook? Don’t wanna ruin a white page? That’s OK; find something you don’t mind ruining. Grab a half-used notebook and a ballpoint pen. You EXPECT those to look horrendous. If you can have fun filling that notebook, you can have fun drawing regularly, and if you draw regularly you can slowly improve your art. It happened to me. I went from rarely drawing to wanting to do it every day. I still sketch in ballpoint now; it’s fun and comfortable.

Also, if drawing’s NOT fun? That’s OK too! There’s loads of ways to express creativity; go do do one of those. For me it was The Sims 3, then knitting, then drawing. Find something accessible and build your confidence up. The world needs bonsai trees and Minecraft castles just as much as drawings. <3

#3 – Seek Instruction

You’ve made drawing a habit, congratulations! You’ve probably learned heaps already; it’s natural to work out techniques as you go. But deducing art wisdom from scratch isn’t super efficient. There’s no need to reinvent the wheel when you can learn so much from others.

You can do a paid course (great way to meet people), but you don’t have to. All the information’s free on the internet! Teachers will cover the same things in different ways or from different perspectives. There’s no exclusive knowledge; the more you study, the more overlap you’ll notice. It all comes together for a more complete understanding of fundamental concepts.

Here’s some of my favourite resources (currently all available free online)(except the Winslow one which was taken down, boo):

  r/artfundamentals, ie. drawabox.com . A great starter course on how to hold a pen, draw lines, build forms and so on. You can follow structured lessons or just practice whatever you need to.

How to Draw: Drawing and Sketching Objects and Environments from Your Imagination, by Scott Robertson. This book’s the gold standard on perspective and great for technical thinkers. It gets VERY advanced but there’s basic stuff to learn from as well. If the textbook intimidates you, try this excellent video playlist by Dan Beardshaw. He walks you through the same concepts in a simple approachable manner. Vital information if you want your work to look 3D.

anything by Andrew Loomis. He’s an icon for a reason; the Loomis head is a standard art tool to this day. I also enjoy the anachronistic career advice (“all advertisers will pay for a well-drawn head” or whatever it was). Here’s the ones I’ve read and enjoyed:

Fun with a Pencil

Figure Drawing for All It’s Worth

Drawing The Head and Hands

Creative Illustration (my current fave, great for composition)

Classic Human Anatomy in Motion, by Valerie L. Winslow. Hot take – people who say “learn anatomy” to beginners are idiots. SO MANY fundamentals come before anatomy if you wanna draw good-looking characters. You’ll get better results studying proportion, form, gesture, shapes and composition first. But if/when you want to learn bones and muscles, this is the book for you! It’s probably overkill, but I loved the breakdown of facial muscles and how they create expression. Top-tier reaction image material.

Proko!! Fabulous Youtube channel. Not only is Stan a great teacher, he invites on other artists too. Just go to his search bar and plug in a keyword; you’ll always find something helpful. I recommend his channel if you want to draw humans (loads of gesture, forms, proportion, anatomy etc.), but there’s a video or two on everything. Some of my other favourite videos:

Mind-Blowing Realistic Shading Tricks. Simple effective intro to light and shadow, I still go back and learn from it.

How to Draw Dynamic Shapes – FORCE Series Part 3. So compelling I bought the book afterwards. Blew my mind, instantly improved all my shapes and in turn my composition and gesture.

Painting Skin Tones and How Light Affects Color. Marco Bucci’s a genius with colours, he explains value and saturation in such fascinating ways.

Digital Shape Carving with Scott Flanders – good companion to the shading video above, teaches dramatic silhouettes and cel-shading within a really interesting workflow.

Google. Any question. Throw it in. Someone’s made a video or reddit post about it. You’d be surprised! I swear, the number of times I’ve typed “composition tips” or “digital watercolour clip studio paint” or “how draw horse head”.

Remember, take it easy. Don’t burn yourself out. Back off if you feel the tears creeping in. Study should supplement your drawings, not replace them. If in doubt, revert to step 2 – “bad” art is better than no art.

4– Study Life

If you did step 3 you’re way ahead of me on this one. USE REFERENCES. Draw things from photos (or real life if possible). Fill your brain with visual information. Here’s a thread I made for sharing references of humans.

What if you prefer to draw from imagination? That’s fine – try a hybrid approach. Doodle whatever comes to you, then look up references and try again. For example I’ll doodle a bear, then draw from photos of bears, then doodle new bears using the things I learned. It’s fun and also a good way to test your knowledge. You may also enjoy combining different references; eg drawing animal fusions, combining poses with an outfits etc. It gets easier to do the more you practice.

Between art pieces I keep a balance between drawing from imagination, drawing from reference, following art lessons, and studying other artists. Speaking of which –

5 – Study Art

Ever heard “Don’t draw anime until you’ve learned anatomy?” or “Learn the rules before you break them?” I strongly disagree with both of those statements. Fundamentals are great but there’s never a point you stop learning them, and studying life won’t teach you how to stylise. That’s why you also need to learn from your favourite artworks. This gets easier/more efficient as you build your broader art skills, but you can learn styles at any point of your art journey (see – step 2). In fact, it makes study more enjoyable, since stylised art can look better and feel more “you”. You already know what you want to create– why not start now?

Let’s take anime as an example. That’s a huge genre with loads of variation. So, what’s your personal taste? Round and cute, or sharp and serious? Choose your favourite shows and study how they do it. Observe their lines, shapes and proportions. Then try it yourself. Make fanart. Not only is replication good art practice in general, it’ll teach you a bunch of new tricks. For original work, pull from loads of sources, the more diverse the better. Work in your love for Silver Age comics or medieval tapestries or German expressionism. The more places you learn from, the more unique and personal your style will be. Your art becomes a visual scrapbook of all the artists you love. I think that’s beautiful. <3

 6 – Find Community

Art friends! Best thing ever. You can bond over your shared obsession, commiserate over tough parts, and learn about art together. A lot of my drawings are in-jokes exchanged with my BFF. I’ve known them from childhood (lucky) but apparently adults can make friends too. Fandom spaces are great for this; many Discord channels have a dedicated artists’ zone. You can also try r/sketchdaily or challenges like Mermay/Inktober if you want a sense of community.

If you don’t have art friends (yet), that’s OK; parasocial works too! I like watching “Draw With Me” content on Youtube. It’s great to put on while you’re creating, especially when you don’t have the energy for something educational. Not only is it inspiring, you can learn tips and tricks along the way. And of course, you can never go wrong with Bob Ross.

 7 – Be Interesting

The very first step was to manage your health. In a way, we’ve looped back to the beginning.  Because no matter what you do, art begins and ends with who you are. You can practice fundamentals 12 hours a day but if you never live your life, you’ll never make interesting art. No one cares for artists whose only character trait is how hard they grind. So go be the most vibrant version of yourself. Take up weird hobbies. Make weird friends. Seek new experiences. Question the beliefs you grew up with. Read books for a while instead of drawing. Develop your principles. Embrace what makes you different. Survive the worst year of your life somehow. Learn what makes you thrive. Your art won’t be for everyone. But it WILL mean the world to some. And to me, that’s the whole point of doing this. Good luck, fellow artist. The world is your adventure yet to come. I believe in you. <3

[myloveforhergoeson]

tw: discussion of scars + childhood injury

“woah… what’s this?”

gingerly, roxy caught james’ left wrist between her calloused fingers, turning his forearm to face her direction as they cuddled on one of the many lounge chairs by the pool. with his well maintained tan from hours spent in the los angeles sun, the thin white line was almost impossible to spot; she’d certainly never noticed it before today.

thumb swiping over the scarred area, she felt james slightly flinch at her touch. “it’s nothing… old injury.”

removing the right arm slung around her waist, he shifted to the left a bit, dark sunglasses obscuring the look on his face. he covered the mark with his hand for a moment, palm over the area like a bandaid, before taking a breath and gathering his girlfriend in his arms once more.

with her ear to his chest, she could hear his heart race. though that might be due to their proximity, the feeling of his palms growing clammy on her bare skin told her otherwise.

she silently praised her choice of a red crop top for the day.

“i’ve got one on the back of my leg,” she said in response to the chill, moving her right foot into the air and wiggling it a bit to ease the tension she could sense radiating off of him in waves. “one of dani’s dogs didn’t like me very much. i got too close to her one day and she really decided to let me know… god, that shit hurt like hell.”

one of his brows raised, signifying she’d caught his attention. “you had to know that she didn’t like you. dogs are super vocal about that type of thing aren’t they? like, missy really hates logan. we think she can sense he’s more of a cat person.”

“i know you’re not blaming me for being viciously bit by a crazy animal right now. everybody else loves me! why should i assume bear felt any different?”

air shot out of his nostrils in a silent chuckle, tickling the top of her head, almost going unheard against the chatter of other hotel patrons on the deck around them. “the dog was named bear?! baby, you were totally asking for it!”

visions of the black labradoodle ran through her mind, much like how bear loved to run through dani’s family’s large, open property. “she was a total sweetheart when mag and dani were around her… maybe she doesn’t like gorgeous, talented women or something.”

james’ nose exhale turned into full on laughter, roxy practically bouncing off his chest as his body shook at her words.

from the table beside their lounger, roxy reached out to take a drink of the lemonade she’d picked up from the cafe, offering the cup out to her boyfriend as well.

after a long, slow sip, james’ free hand set it down before sinking into her long hair. instinctively, her arm draped around his waist. “i forgot to put the blade guards on my skates after practice one night. coach worked us so hard that day i was just happy to get off the ice and get home; too distracted by what my mom might be making for dinner to think straight. walked out of the arena with my bag in one hand and my stick and skates in the other, hit a patch of black ice before i reached her car, and ended up cutting myself up pretty darn good.”

just the thought of the sharp, stainless steel of an ice skate anywhere near her skin caused a shiver to crawl down the girl’s spine. “that must have been awful…”

“well a trip to the er, sixteen stitches, and a bunch of ibuprofen later i was feeling just fine. i think my ego was more bruised than anything. my mom was super freaked though.”

“well yeah,” roxy nodded, finger rising to trace the lines of the soft black tank top james wore, “any mom would be worried about such a substantial injury. i’ve never had stitches but i imagine sixteen means it was very big and very deep.”

closing his eyes, james took another breath. “deep? yes. big? eh. nothing like the time carlos got a metal plate put in his head.”

“jesus christ. i’m going to pass out just thinking of it…” her hand curled into a fist, taking the smooth fabric with it.

a few kids from their class were starting up a game of volleyball in the pool in front of them, sounds of shouting and splashing water distracting the writer from their conversation momentarily.

“but you’re right,” james continued. “my mom was worried - just not about me. more about the mark it would leave than anything… she even called an emergency meeting for her product development team to start work on a scar cream. i still use it to this day.”

roxy chose not to comment on the success of the cream if she was still able to see the mark that remained on her boyfriend’s skin, though her heart panged at his words. clearly, brooke’s concern had reached him, just for the wrong reasons. she saw it in the way he instinctively covered the area when she’d mentioned it, in the solemn way he discussed the product he still used, months, maybe years, after his accident.

without thinking, her fingers caught his wrist again from where they tangled in her locks and pulled his forearm to the sun once more. the scar stood out more prominently to her now, and now she couldn’t even remember what he looked like without it. it was part of what made james james. “she shouldn’t have made you feel that way... it was an accident; you were seriously hurt. who cares what it would look like in the future? what should have mattered was your safety in that moment and beyond.”

he didn’t respond to her, gaze somewhere off in the distance behind the tint of his shades. this time, when roxy swiped her thumb over the area, he didn’t jump.

“we all show concern in our own way i suppose,” he whispered into her hair, placing a kiss on her crown before resting his chin there.

as they cuddled by the pool, james hugged roxy just a little bit tighter.

[trubbishrubbish]

Happy Last Day of 2023. Here's a long overdue update over how I have been.

As you recall, Jabberwock Genocide Part 2 was uploaded 3 weeks ago. And the only thing I did this whole month of December after Part 2 was uploaded was that I went to Canada to climb a huge mountain and confront my other self because it’s cheaper than going to therapy.

Just kidding, I just worked on more Jabberwock Genocide, nothing else.

This is a positive as I have made so much forward progress in the animation and the upcoming part 3 that you guys won’t have to wait 9 months for more Genocide Jack fun time. However, there is a cost to just working on Jabberwock Genocide, one that I’m currently struggling to find a way to deal with.

Basically, all my free time, focus and thinking has been dedicated to Jabberwock Genocide, but other stuff I do and create I have left to the dust.

My output in making Genocide Jack posts has just stopped.

I keep neglecting to share updates to my Sho Shrine. I am still getting new stuff for it but I have not yet organized it and taken picture of it.

I have barely played any new games. The last game I have beaten that is new was Super Mario Bros Wonder. I loved that game, but I had a hard time sitting down to play it for long sessions as I wanted to work on Jabberwock Genocide.

And tragically, I have really neglected interacting with my online friends. This I feel the most guilty of as I have no excuse for it. I know there are friends I used to talk to a lot before that I have now stopped engaging with for a really long time. If you are one of those people I just to say that I am sorry for ghosting you. I still consider you a friend I don't want our friendship to slowly die out due to lack of communication on my end.

This is my struggle. I love making Jabberwock Genocide. It’s honestly the most enriching thing I am currently doing in my life. I’m creating a story with my favorite character, Genocide Jack. I’m developing my skill as a sprite animator. I’m constantly thinking about how to create a particular scene with the limited resources I have. I get a real kick of joy when I am creating a scene and suddenly an idea comes to mind that I love and I put it in the animation.

I feel so satisfied when the ideas I have for a scene that I see in my head are transmitted into actual animation on my editor. More often then not, what I make in the final product is better than what I imagine in my head. Every single line, every single detail, every single joke, it all feels so amazing to craft them into a video.

It’s crazy to think that just a few months ago, I was at a low point in the animation where all of my motivation was drained and I struggled to make progress for weeks. But now, I feel so freaking happy and elated just thinking about the animation. Heck, even doing really tedious tasks like making every single sprite jump a little is still enjoyable to me. I’ve been working on this project since August 2022. I never expected this to be what is now when I first started writing down ideas. But I am happy the project did turn into this, because I really, truly enjoy working on this.

But… That’s the problem. I enjoy working on Jabberwock Genocide so much that any other hobbies, I find less fun. I rewrote my brain to dedicate huge parts of it to think about Jabberwock Genocide. I’m fully being this attached to a project like this isn’t healthy. I should be consuming different media and doing other activities and talking to my friends. I know this but I find it difficult to summon the energy to do it.

I’m still trying to find a good balance between working on the project and doing other leisure activities that I enjoy doing. I’m going to make this a goal for 2024, it might take me a while to find that balance but I will try to. Hopefully when I do, I can slowly rekindle friendships that I have abandoned.

That’s what I wanted to say. Thank you for taking the time to read this. See you in 2024.

[quinloki]

What's this - someone who actually wants to hear about my OC? Like, willingly???    (Of course, this led to me not knowing where to start and overthinking every detail, and long story short, this took me almost two hours to write. But also, I’m so happy I have an excuse to share her with someone.)

My character is a sea witch named Blue, who was enslaved from an early age due to her ability to manipulate the ocean. Think water bender, only for saltwater. 

The crew meets her early in the Grand Line when she wrecks the Going Merry on the island of her current captor. He conveniently ran the island’s only shipyard and used Blue’s powers to manipulate the tides to lure in (and then wreck) ships, which he would then fix at a huge cost. 

Luffy and the others are the first people to show her kindness in a long, long time. So when she finds out her owner plans to turn them over to the Marines for the bounty, she decides to help them escape. Of course, things go wrong; she’s found out, and everything leads up to a huge battle to take down the operation and free her in the process.

I focus a lot of her story on learning how to become a person. Her whole life, she’s been treated as a tool to be used, so even though she’s free, she has no sense of identity or purpose and no clue how to move through the normal world. Each of the Strawhats helps her figure it out in one way or another, and she slowly goes from being this blank slate to a lively, compassionate person who finds joy in the smallest things.

Anyway, I ship her with Zoro (or Sanji and Zoro when I’m feeling a certain way 😉). I like to think they’re a good contrast; she softens his hard edges, and he helps her sharpen hers. I’ve spent way too much time world-building the history of her people and how they tie into the world. I’ve been in and out of the One Piece fandom since the 4kids days, so Blue is one of my oldest OCs. She’s changed a lot over the years as I’ve grown as a person and as a writer. The live-action rekindled my love for the series, so I’ve been catching up on the anime for the past few months. It’s been fun to visit with her again and imagine how her story has progressed through these latest arcs.

Ok, I'm done. Byeeeeeeee.

I love Blue! \o/ The name immediately made me think of Breath of Fire and Breath of Fire 2 - Blue is an amazing Naga wizard you can recruit and she's always powerful (super cool looking too).

But then we got to Water-bending! Yes! I love it. A non-DF style control of the world around you. A derivative of how fishman karate works /nod nod/ it's a great build for an OC.

I'm so glad the Live Action rekindled your enjoyment of One Piece, and I'm glad to hear you're enjoying catching back up. I have *not* been into One Piece since the 4kids days, but I do remember it airing back in those days. (I was watching Reboot and DBZ >.> ) I only started watching like mid-2022, and then just dove into writing because of it.

Eeeeee, thank you so much for sharing about Blue =3

If you write anything official for her, or have already, please let me know. I'd love to read it ^_^ <3

Ship it Good ask game

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 166 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: cutting the Kolkwitzia amabilis in my garden.

MARTIN: "What happened back there? What you did to Sa–" [HE CUTS HIMSELF OFF.] [A PAUSE.] JON: "Go on. Say it." Oh no. Oh god, does Jon think that Martin thinks it was his fault that Sasha died?

HELEN: "Oh, goodness. You see what you’ve done to the poor boy, John? He’s coming to me for clear answers." Oh Helen really knows how to get under one's skin.

HELEN: (giggle) "It’s very satisfying though, isn’t it? Teasing out vague information? You see why Elias got a kick out of it." Oh fuuuck, and now she's comparing him to Elias? Jon really is straight up not having a good time..

TMA usually is super vague, but I'm actually happy we got an explanation how the smiting works. Does sound plausible, I’d say. But also, this explanation about there only being watcher and watched should have got Martin's gears to turn. They are not victims of a domain. So they have to be watchers.

MARTIN: "Sure. Okay, that’s – I mean, that’s really not that complicated, John; I don’t see why you were being so coy about it –" JON: (overlapping) "Because I’m ashamed, Martin." [SLIGHT PAUSE.] MARTIN: "Ashamed?!" JON: "Yes! Ashamed of the fact that I just – destroyed the world and have been rewarded for it, the fact that – I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a… fucking tourist, destroying whoever I please. The fact that I… enjoyed it, and… the fact that there are so many others that I want to revenge myself on!" Why does everything in TMA feel so natural!! There is so much bad and boring writing out there, every time something very logical happens it makes me super excited xD  So yap. It's super understandable that he's ashamed of all of this. Especially since we know how he actually feels about this revenging stuff. His anger says “do it!”, but his logic says “It’s not gonna do anything”..

MARTIN: "…No; No, I actually think you’re good on that front." JON: "What?" MARTIN: "Yeah, I, I, I think we should go for it, get our murder on!" Martin, when he only remotely tastes power xD

MARTIN: "f you want to stop them and have the power to, then – then, then yeah, let’s do it, let’s go full Kill Bill!" JON: "I – I, I haven’t seen it." Laughed so hard at this xD Of course he is deflecting.

HELEN: "Oh, Martin, I am so proud of you. Can I come?" JON & MARTIN: (in unison) "No." HELEN: "So that’s a strong “maybe” then?" Asgdsdfjkdf, Helen can also be so funny! One of those characters I hate and love!

MARTIN: "Do you need anything?" [JON EXHALES.] JON: "No." Love that Martin checks in with him there. He has been a bit dismissive of Jon's feelings about this whole situation.

Yeah, that statement does nothing to me, neither terror nor excitement. As far as I understand it, it's more about the financial part of the Buried. About the pressure of the society we live in, ever trapped in bullshit jobs with only ever a glint of the prospect of escape and there is no use in fighting others like us (that second worm part) cause if we win against them, we’re stuck exactly where we were before.

"The rains fall here as they do so many places in this new world. Thick and oily drops that taste of bitter salt, torrential tears plummeting from the watching sky, thumping and squelching onto the thirsty soil in which the worms writhe painfully towards a surface that does not want them." That is a gross image!

"How do you fight, when you cannot move beyond the slowest inching crawl, without limbs or weapons or the kinetic force of violence? You do it slowly, pressing, biting, tearing gradually through each other until at the very end, one of you is still." There is a very horrifying animatic of this part of the statement, it's called "The Worms (Magnus Archives Fan Animation)”.

JON: "God, I hate the Buried." Mh, he was there once...

That phone's got to be a Nokia 3310, right? XD It is the Nokia ringtone after all!

ANNABELLE: "He’s more powerful here than he’s ever been, isn’t he? And you’re not sure what that means for you." [THE BRIEFEST OF PAUSES. MARTIN INHALES SHAKILY.] MARTIN: "I’m hanging up now." ANNABELLE: "Does he even need you at all?" That part about "you're not sure what that means for you" is actually something I could relate to. Especially in a relationship this young and under extremely high stress levels. Shared trauma and being in the same life-threatening situation can create incredibly strong bonds. Being in that same boat. But how life-threatening is it actually for them? Aside from his guilt and post trauma, Jon is very much fine in this new world. Still, not sure what Annabelle wanted to achieve with this, she does mention it to have been "clumsy", so yeah.

[THE PREVIOUSLY-HOWLING THINGS IN THE BURIED – LIKELY THE WORMS FAR BELOW – HOWL AGAIN, INSISTENTLY.] MARTIN: "I know, right?" Adflkdhfs, this episode has some great comedy!

@a-mag-a-day

[fredseibertdotcom]

Emil Rensing, photographed by Elena Seibert, 2001

My mentor: Emil Rensing 

Emil Rensing changed my life. I’ve been lucky that as I’ve gotten older instead of completely settling in (though there’s naturally a lot of that too) there are folks around me that kept me from thinking “old.” Scott Webb and the Nickelodeon promo team, the Fred/Alan gang, the great artists and writers in my cartoon lives. But, I must say, I think when the consumer internet came buzzing, I was just about ready to turn off my brain to it and let the yung’uns take over. Jed Simmons tried to stop me, but I was tired, I was done. Then came Emil. 

For many years, like everyone else, my mentors had been older me (excepting Bob Pittman, my original MTV boss, who was two years younger). But when I was almost 50, it flipped on me. And the first kid that started teaching me a lot of stuff was... Emil Rensing. 

Emil has a number of super powers, not the least being a superior, raw intelligence. He’s a computer engineer, sure (he was one of the early employees of the then-revolutionary AOL), but... My experience has been there are engineers who know how to invent things, build things, fix things, but there are few who understand the human who use those things. On the other hand, the folks who can comprehend humans, don’t often have grasp on where technology is going, they can only figure out where it’s been (I’m probably on that spectrum). Emil, he can connect the dots. It’s seems simple when I’m writing this, but trust me it’s not. Emil appreciates, deduces, discerns, interprets, recognizes, penetrates. Emil sees. 

Emil and I met in 1999, but here’s the quick backstory. 

After a try at becoming a record producer, a stint in country radio and cable television, I had somehow or other found myself happily, thrillingly, in the cartoon business. Then, a few months after insisting to a friend that I was happy just learning to be an independent cartoon producer, the internet was for others, I became the first/only president of MTV Networks Online. Just like any other occupation I’ve had, I had no idea what I was doing. 

A friend from the animation biz, Charlie Fink, someone always interested in ‘what’s next,’ had left Hollywood and joined the early, money losing, what-the-fuck-is-this-internet-thing. He suggested I meet a young engineer –Signore Rensing– he’d worked with. I did, and even though –maybe because!– Emil was 25 years younger, I asked him to join my team, he did. 

It’s hard for me to say what happened in the next year, but for me, it was confusing. The company didn’t really want to succeed in the internet, they just wanted some of that internet moolah that was floating around, and I still didn’t know what I was doing other than occupying space. Soon enough, it was clear to me I couldn’t move the company in any useful direction, so it was equally clear I had to quit. When I told Emil I was leaving he announced he’d quit earlier that day. 

Frederator/NY announcement posters by Hatch Show Print, Nashville

Spontaneously, I blurted, “let’s start a company together. You keep showing me what the internet will mean to me and I’ll you how to make TV shows.” He agreed and we were in business. Frederator Studios –Eric Homan and Kevin Kolde– kept the cartoon fires burning (My Life as a Teenage Robot, Random! Cartoons, Fanboy and Chum Chum, Adventure Time, et cetera) and we started a media/internet consultancy in New York.  The details don’t matter, we did some good work, we made some TV shows, we started some of the early internet video successes, eventually we started, then sold, yet another new company that paced the world in the new vision of streaming video. 

Next New Networks, founded by Emil Rensing & Fred Seibert, posters by Frank Olinsky

Most importantly, Emil kept me young, kept me smart, helped set my stage for the next 20+ years. Emil Rensing changed my life. 

Thank you buddy. xxoo 

I’ve posted often about my mentors, the people I’ve learned the most from. And I’ve noted how often how many of them beg to differ as to whether or not I should credit them as such. So, I’ve calmed down in my titling. But still…

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

#1, 4, 5, and 24 for the writing ask game!

the last sentence you wrote

Ghostbur smiles, keeping one hand over the girl and one hand over the boy, grateful that they’re small enough to both fit on his lap; they’re much too cold, and they need to get warmed up.

For context, this is a modern AU where he works at an animal sanctuary! In this bit he’s taking care of two baby sheep :)

a story idea you haven’t written yet

So many!!! One of the more recent ones is a Wingfeather Saga fic :0

It takes place post-canon, so after the fourth book, and it really just… I guess explores Artham & Arundelle’s relationship! It’s heavily heavily heavily inspired by Turning Out Pt.iii by AJR (the song does contain swearing and one slightly inappropriate lyric, just so you know!).

It’s gonna be a very long one-shot. More serious vibes, with lots of emotion. It’s from Artham’s POV, and he’s dealing with… a lot of things. He loves Arundelle very dearly and they’re planning to marry super soon, but he’s also really struggling with thoughts about how worthy he is to be her husband; is he worthy to be her husband? He doesn’t feel worthy. He feels like he’s not good enough for her, that she deserves someone better, someone less broken.

So the story follows that plot line :) I’m very excited for it!! Haven’t gotten around to writing down a single word for it though.

first sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP

For three, the doctors always do all these weird things that don’t make any sense, like sending a hammer down on your knee, or sticking a hammer-looking thing into your ear, or pushing a white stick all the way to the back of your throat until you feel like throwing up.

I’m gonna cheat a little bit and share some more of this WIP, because it makes me quite happy and I really enjoy the story I came up with :)

Doctor visits are bad.

They’re always bad; there’s just not anything good about doctors, or doctor visits. Tommy reckons that if he ever met a doctor on the street, he’d punch their stomach and make them breathe all funny, and then he’d steal their eyes.

For one, the place is cold—always, without fail. Cold. The waiting room, the hallways, the examination room or whatever it’s called. It’s all just cold. Even the doctor’s hands are cold. Tommy hates the cold.

For two, the whole thing is a real big invasion of privacy. There are certain things that Tommy would rather not have anybody look at, least of all complete strangers with cold hands.

For three, the doctors always do all these weird things that don’t make any sense, like sending a hammer down on your knee, or sticking a hammer-looking thing into your ear, or pushing a white stick all the way to the back of your throat until you feel like throwing up. It’s all just weird. Tommy can’t make any sense of any of it.

And those are just some of the reasons; there’s a whole lot more, but Tommy doesn’t really want to go through all of them, because that’ll just make him angry, and he doesn’t like to be angry.

But in short: doctors are bad, doctor visits are bad, and Tommy really despises the whole lot of it.

But as much as he hates doctor visits, he knows that Ghostbur hates them more. Ghostbur’s always hated them more.

how do you recharge when you’re not feeling creative?

This is a bit of an ironic question, because I’ve actually been in writers block for several weeks now 😅

What I usually do is not force myself to write. I’ve noticed that whenever I’ve done that in the past—made myself write even if I felt uninspired and generally Bleh—then I ended up really disliking whatever I wrote, and I wouldn’t want to return to it. That’s unfortunately happened with several of my fics before :(

So yes, I basically take a little break from writing until the inspiration comes back! In the meantime, I spend time doing other things, like reading, playing ukulele/guitar, watching Dream SMP, going really crazy over a show, so on and so forth.

Typically, after a little bit of a writing break, I snap out of the creative slump and am able to go back to writing :)

[gotta-hug-em-all]

The end? or the beginning?

Hiya cuties! I’m uh… not used to writing in this sorta way, I usually post on other websites, but this one is kinda too long to put anywhere else. So you’re stuck with me blogging it instead! Hope that’s ok with all the fine residents of Rotomblr! Just some background, I can’t keep Pokemon because I didn’t pass the really easy yearly “are you smart enough to raise Pokemon '' competency exam. Like ya know, the one that like 99.9% of people pass? So I’ve been going around collecting hugs instead of Pokemon. Gym leaders each give me a challenge to do so I can hug their Pokemon, and today I did the final gym, Drayden’s. His was pretty simple: slay three dragons. More specifically, beat his three dragon type Pokemon in battle. So that’s what I was doing! I’m gonna be like really dramatic about it cuz that’s fun, but I promise I’m not making anything up. This is Jace Embrace letting you in to see his (very large sized) heart. Aaaanyways, without further ado, here’s the story of how I beat Drayden!

So it all started with a waiver. Standard stuff really, most of the time the stuff I do for fun is really dangerous, so you gotta sign away your right to like do stuff if you get hurt and stuff, but this one was like… way different. The agreement that the other person is trying to hurt you kinda makes it go to a whole nother level. I’d prefer if I didn’t die, after all, but also if I go out fighting a dragon type in my knight outfit, I guess that’d be a pretty fun way to go. This waiver was like at least 30 pages longer than all the other ones I’ve signed before. It’s that kinda anxiety I live for, the kind that makes me scared, the kind that makes me want to run away. Not running away is the best part. Standing my ground and telling myself I can do something even if my subconscious tells me I shouldn’t. Being the master of my own subconscious makes it all worth it. The only thing that brought me conscious resistance was the understanding that my friends, boyfriend, and Frank (A love variant Solosis I created on accident/on purpose) would miss me if I were gone. But I think just like people who go climbing and caving, they accepted that my hobby was dangerous, and supported me despite that baggage. Honestly… I can’t thank them enough for that. It’s been nice to have that off my shoulders, even if there was a time where it dragged me down so much I almost turned into someone I hated. But all that’s behind me by a lot now, I’m a new man (new femboy? Is that a saying people use?) now, and I couldn’t love myself more. Rough around the edges a bit, but hopefully that changes. I’m pretty damn hopeful it will, especially after the events of this story. Oh shit I got off track again, so I signed that waiver. It's so ironic that I feel the most alive when I put my life on the line, but I’ve found happiness in it.

The countdown rushed by, Drayden sent out his Fraxure first, I guess he was doing this gym leader style. I felt pretty confident about this, which for reasons I’ll get into later, was stupid. But that’s ok, stupid isn’t a dealbreaker, just an issue to work around. So I charged into combat, and of course this did not go super well. I am a human. Humans don’t have super special magic powers, they have super normal mundane powers, like calculus. I don’t know calculus and even if I did I don’t think it’d help me fight a dragon type. Anyways, I started getting my ass absolutely kicked, like so hard, like it hurt a lot. I tried to like… unlock my inner anime self, but obviously that doesn’t exist in real life so I kinda just looked like a dude shouting at a Fraxure while getting his ass beat first. Drayden wasn’t even giving commands, just sorta letting it fight like a Pokemon in the wild. I ended up getting knocked to the ground several times. 

Drayden honestly trains his Pokemon well, the rule was that I wasn’t allowed to faint, otherwise I’d lose the battle. Kinda like a normal Pokemon battle. He definitely trained it well cause I didn’t die, and it was definitely being soft. I think the goal was to get me to quit. After a few minutes of getting roughed up, I stumbled back, clutching my sword arm, which had been heavily wounded in the process. My sword was all the way across the room, and between it and me was the Fraxure. For the first time in the whole fight, Drayden barked out a command.

“Finish him. Dragon Tail.” There was nothing I could do. Simply put. It was faster than me, stronger than me, it had more stamina than me, even my tiny-ass brain could put that together. I was fucked. I didn’t run though. I never run. I stood my ground, holding up both arms, gritting my teeth as the movement brought stabs of pain to me. What was coming for me would hurt, I knew that, so I braced for that pain. As the Fraxure charged me at full speed, I heard a voice, but not with my ears, with my brain. It spoke loudly, with a deep and monotone voice, almost like a robot. “{Anomaly. On. Your. Six.}”

Before I could even look behind me, there was a burst of force I felt on my back. Not enough to move me, but enough to feel it. The Fraxure in front of me seemed to hit an invisible wall inches before its attack made contact, dropping to the ground, fainted. I gasped, shocked that I was still conscious. As I looked behind myself, Drayden returned his Fraxure to his pokeball. Behind me was a rather large Sigilyph, its patterns looked strange, its markings having much more complexity than what I was used to seeing on my adventures. Yet… it looked familiar to me. “{Anomaly I am… rather I was… the Keeper. I sense you do not recognize me. It has been 8 months since I last met with you face to face. I now wish to fight alongside you. I await a new purpose. To fight alongside you like the knights and Sigilyph of old. Let me aid you in combat. Now, and until we part.}” Not gonna lie. I kinda cried a lot. But I had to keep fighting. I ran up and hugged it, gasping in pain of course, my right arm was still injured. After a short hug, I stepped back. Suddenly, the Sigilyph’s eye began to glow a soft purple as I felt the pain in my arm fade away. It was definitely still wounded, I still couldn’t move it right, but at least it didn’t hurt. I looked behind me, back at Drayden. He gave me a smile under his white beard. What a GILF. I still don’t know if he knew this would happen, oh well.

Drayden threw out his second pokeball, letting out a hearty chuckle as a Druddigon appeared. I figured I should give a name to my first ever pokemon “I guess this is where the real battle starts. I’m gonna start calling you Squire, is that ok?” the Sigilyph responded “{Your wish is my command. You are right handed. For now, you will be left handed. Fight with your left arm as your right is wounded.}” Its eye began to glow again, and I could feel a weird sensation in my hands and head. Squire didn’t explain until later that handedness is determined by both genetics and the way the brain develops. He couldn’t change the way my body was genetically routed, but he could subtly rewrite my mind to make me temporarily ambidextrous, turning all my (admittedly low) sword muscle memory into muscle memory for a mirrored stance. I don’t quite understand it all, but I understand it enough to know it works. This weird feeling didn’t last long, and I was quickly snapped out of it by Drayden giving a command to his Druddigon.

“Druddigon, Revenge.” He ordered the pokemon, which caused it to charge me with brutal intent. From Squire, I once again heard his voice in my head “{Anomaly, I am casting the protective seal of reflection and the protective screen of light.}” Its patterns began to glow and shake, and two different translucent layers of energy surrounded me, as if to serve as a miniature forcefield clinging to my skin. I took up a defensive stance, knowing I still couldn’t dodge this attack either. It hit me with an all things considered quite forceful shoulder check, and I was sent flying across the battle arena. We weren’t using the two dragons for obvious reasons, so instead we were using a flat arena so I didn’t accidentally fall to my death. As I flew, I realized something. I wasn’t actually hurt all too bad. None of me felt broken, just a few cuts here and there. Time seemed to slow down as my mind was driven into overdrive. I heard Squire’s voice in my head once more. “{I have taken the liberty of temporarily increasing the speed at which your brain functions. I will also cast the seal of the tailwind to allow you to move faster so your body moves at the speed your mind thinks. This is how the knights of Relic Castle once fought. Fight with bravery and purity of heart. I will serve as your spotter.}”

My movement sped up once more as it beat its wings, causing a magical wind to press my body to move faster, catching up with my sped up mind. I was able to grab ahold of one of the rafters of the arena, slowing the impact and hanging from above. “Follow him, Night Slash” Drayden shouted at his Druddigon, which flapped its wings and began pursuit. It would normally be way faster than me, but with Squires assistance, I now fought with it on an even playing field. I still needed my sword, and I knew just how I’d get to it.

As the Druddigon flew into the air, I swung myself down from the rafters, landing feet first on its head, moving far faster than it expected. Its guard wasn’t up yet, so I was able to kick it in the snout with both my metal armored boots. Using its face as a springboard, I jumped off of it in the direction of my sword, the Tailwind carrying me until I was very close. I ran up and as I leaned down to snatch the sword, I felt a subtle suggestion in the back of my mind telling me to do a flip. So I did a flip, grabbing the sword in my left hand as I did. I’m glad I heeded the advice of the suggestion, since doing the flip allowed me to see what was behind me: a full speed charging Druddigon with a claw wrapped in darkness aimed directly at me.

In midair I raised my sword to parry the claw, in a movement the felt familiar but I knew I had never used. It was around this point I realized Squire wasn’t just watching me, he was helping me, teaching me moves on the spot I had never learned, giving me muscle memory that I’d never had before. The human body was versatile, I had never really thought about it much, but with Squire’s help covering for my statistical weaknesses I was able to employ these techniques, techniques used by knights of old, stored in the Sigilyph’s memory to help people like me fight. No wonder he followed me for so long. I had accidentally unearthed an ancient tradition that he was purpose-built to serve. His mental assistance was clearing up the brain fog that my ADHD caused, making it easier to enter the flow state. I could think clearer, coming to these realizations in the split seconds before the Druddigon struck at me. My sword parried the blow effortlessly, transferring the energy of the slash into the ground instead of my face, causing the Druddigon to let out a roar as it smashed its claw on the metal ground, making sparks fly.

“Dragon Tail.” Drayden barked orders at the Druddigon as I looked down at my sword. I was expecting the sword to be heavily damaged, but whatever protective barrier that Squire applied to me also had enveloped the sword, also strengthening its durability. Before the Druddigon could begin his attack, I began mine. I charged it with the tip of my sword pointed at it, unleashing a flurry of whirling slashes and stabs. From here on, I fell into a rhythm, my body almost moving on its own as I fought with my mind in tandem with Squire, using both its view and my view, a third person view and a first person view, an experienced mind and a brave mind. The Druddigon had thick hide that allowed it to shrug off most attacks, but by aiming for weak points and getting it to slam into walls, I eventually brought it down. 

Drayden sent out his final Pokemon, his Haxorous. This was his ace, I did do a little bit of research before the fight (watching one mewtube video that I fell asleep right before the midway point of), but Squire was bringing the knowledge of that video that I had passively absorbed to the forefront of my mind. I knew he would try to have it set up with Dragon Dance, then strike at me with Dragon Tail until it won. I could win if I didn’t allow it space to set up, so that’s exactly what I did.

The rest of the fight was a blur as I sunk into tactics, once again entering a trancelike state as I was assisted by Squire. Before I fully realized what was going on, I brought the Haxorus to the ground, finishing the fight by smashing the pommel of my sword into its head hard enough to knock it out. By now my sword, despite its increased durability, was heavily damaged, so I quickly sheathed it and bowed to Drayden in true fashionable Jace style. “Good fight! I had a lot of fu- oop…” I said as I suddenly felt all the strength drain from my body, causing me to fall to the ground. “{As a downside to increasing your speed and mental capacity… battles such as these will be very physically taxing on your mind and body. A good night’s rest will do you good, but for now just sit and take a breather.}” 

I laid there for a few minutes as Drayden approached me, withdrawing his Haxorus. Once I felt I was physically able, I sat up and reached a hand towards Drayden, which he knelt down to shake before picking me up like a baby and taking me to a bench for me to sit down on. “You fought well.” His normally ever-present glare had softened a bit, making him seem almost like a grandfather. “I will allow you to hug my Pokemon now, and I will grant you this badge. It’s not the normal badge we give, you will have to return and fight me in a Pokemon vs. Pokemon battle for that, but it is a badge. The Opelucid badge of honor. I don’t normally give these out to just any person who enters my gym, but you have shown outstanding courage, determination, and most importantly of all, kindness. You’ve made friends along the way in your journey and fostered relationships that will last you a lifetime should you cultivate them with great care. Your optimistic personality is admirable as well, for you shine as a light in other people’s darkness, although you might want to make sure that your light is not blinding, even legends have flaws and I urge you to keep that in mind as you continue your journey across Unova. Lastly… I’ll get to my point in all this. You have two Pokemon that would call you their master if you had the means to have them join your party. One of them is here, the other you have sent off to stay with someone else. Both of these could only exist in the way they do because of your love. I believe if you were allowed to raise them, you would do so far better than most trainers. I cannot change the current establishment to allow for people like you to prove yourselves, but I do intend to fund a project for people like you who struggled in school to get the help they need. Your story has taught me something valuable: sometimes all someone needs to be great is a little help here and there. I’m going to appeal to the league and ask that they give you a two month temporary license. I trust during this time you will study hard for your next exam. I believe in your ability to succeed this time. Keep your head held high Jace, I hope that one day you surpass me in strength.”

The rest of the day was a blur. There’s plans for me to get a whole ceremony celebrating my accomplishments and stuff. I won’t complain but I think it’s a bit much for little ol me… I plan to study hard like Drayden said. Squire has already agreed to help me, and I have convinced him to start calling me “Jace” or “Knight” instead of “Anomaly” so that’s cool. I look forward to my future. I might’ve failed my trainers license exam 9 times in a row, but I wasn’t built different back then. When I was on the journey back to the hotel room I was staying in with my boyfriend, we were talking about the trainer license exam. The conversation went a little something like this:

“Do you think you can learn enough to pass in two months? It’s been a while since you’ve been to school.”

“If I were to take the whole exam in one sitting… it might be a little tough.”

“Would you fail?”

“Nah, I’d pass.”

[ltcolonelcarter]

So… I wanna know if you have a couple sentences (maybe even a paragraph) that you feel best shows off your talent. And share plez me wanna see 🧍🏻‍♀️😌

ohhhh I’ve thought about this for so long. SO LONG.

I… cheated, and have picked a few. it’s difficult to pick something without also nitpicking it, so I’ve tried to go for a range that show you what I feel best represents my ✨style✨

a question of time, ch 1

Firm, withholding the worst of her disappointment for his benefit; still, his pervading thought was that she hadn’t looked at him for more than a few seconds at a time, as though avoiding him—or perhaps avoiding the ghost of someone else. Instead she’d spoken to the roses she tended, blooming a glorious, vivid crimson, and let him overhear.

occasionally I’ll write a line and it just captures exactly what I ✨see✨. this last line, Amanda not even caring enough to look at Sixty, so consumed by her garden, was that. her disinterest… Sixty, like Connor, looking for approval and finding none… sigh. it’s the perfect starting point for him. not even doomed, just… inconsequential

all of ch 6 of aqot was a Struggle, but in terms of interesting style/formatting I was super happy with how it turned out. the non-chronological order worked out far better than I’d hoped. I cant add any more aqot without spoilers, so I’ll leave it there 😏

last call, ch 2

In their usual seats by the bar, Connor and Hank sit, locked in rapid fire conversation. Hank’s nursing something that looks suspiciously not like his favourite whiskey, which tells you they’re not celebrating, and Connor’s gesticulating as he speaks, his face animated and expressive.

Hank makes a comment, punctuated with the sway of his glass, and Connor laughs at him, his eyes bright; the loose collection of colleagues around them laugh too, following his lead, and you’re caught in the sound, isolated against the background noise of the bar, bathed in colour by the string lights above.

okay so I’m sure you pointed this one out to me before buuuut… it feels exactly the way I wanted it to. it’s a warm moment watched from a distance. I feel like it subtly catches character without being too weighed down with description. I’ve been working recently on trying to build up scenes and atmosphere without getting caught up in length prose, and this one shows a nice balance, I think.

I think I’m going to combust, but thank you for this ask, it’s been interesting and I got to yell a BUNCH