#but anyway. that change of the man who talked and leaned on his wife. to the man who walled everything away in the name of protection

[dahllaz]

I am still on my SVU bullshit and started watching the early seasons again. Watching Monogamy now and I did not remember the subplot of Elliot's home troubles at all.

And Liv just chewed him out a bit for not talking to Kathy, after he told her that he can't go home and share these things, these horrors, with his wife.

But the thing is. He used to. In season 1? He did share, he did talk about the cases with Kathy.

So it's kind of fascinating to think about what changed.

[Well. Our universe it seems pretty obvious the answer was show runner change between s1 and s2.]

In universe...an easy explanation is EO was the driver but...I honestly don't see any real romantic undertones between them yet. Might be my AO shipper heart but really don't see different undertones to their relationship until after Alex is gone.

Before that they just read as Family to me, not wrestling with any desires for more/for the possibility of more.

So it leaves me wondering what happened. Was it the Morris Commission and Elliot almost losing his job? Did he tell Kathy and she was horrified to learn he fantasized about killing these perps and he responded by never sharing anything again?

Did he share something and Kathy ended up with nightmares? Did he share and one of the kids overheard?

What. Happened.

[the-froschamethyst4]

Badge and Medics

𖤐Pairing: Cop! Gaz x Doctor! F! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: fluff, heavy language, mention of needles, OD’s (overdose) and some violence, some sexism, married couple, kissing, drug usage, medical terminology,

𖤐Summary: Being married to a cop is one thing but married to a cop who somehow always gets the calls about people on drugs and he brings them to his wife’s place of work is another

————

————

"2-Adam-23, there is a potential illegal drug usage in downtown Manchester."

"Another one?"

"2-Adam-23, responding," Gaz flipped the lights on after responding to the radio. Price then drove to the address given by dispatch.

Beep, beep, beep, beep

"Heart is steady...keep an eye on him just in case."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Druggy coming through," Price announced as he held a guy by his left arm and Gaz on his right.

"Officers, what's going on?"

"Someone used an illegal drug, and now here we are," short and sweet, Price.

"We usually see Doctor Y/n."

"I'm here, I'm here," Y/n came walking to the two officers, she looks at the man sweating profusely. "Get him into room 6," she tells the officers who moved him to the room.

The man was shouting profanities at Gaz and Price, spitting which caused Gaz to shove the mans head to his stomach.

"You are not going to spit," Gaz warns him.

"Oh fuck you, you bitch! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE! TAKE ME TO JAIL!"

"The jail won't accept you high off your mind," Price tells him as they cuffed both of his wrists on both sides of the railing and Gaz grabbed the spit hood putting it over the mans face to keep him from spitting.

"Okay, so what am I doing?" Y/n asked, she was joking, she knew what she was doing, this is the 5th person high off their mind on some kind of substance.

"I WANT A DOCTOR NOT A NURSE!!"

"I am a doctor-"

"FINE BITCH, I WANT A MALE DOCTOR!! NOT SOME WHORE IN A WHITE COAT!!"

"Watch it," Gaz says through gritted teeth.

"Easy, tiger...well no male wants to deal with you ass, so they sent me in because you...don't scare me, I'm not stuck in cuffs right now," she says, taking a needle and sticking it in the mans arm, he squirms and shouts and slowly starts to drift off to sleep.

Price was impressed with Y/n along with Gaz, he smirks and looks down at his wife.

"Woah." Y/n then uncapped another needle sucking the blood from the drugged mans veins.

"Give him a few minutes of sleep and it should be done and over with, we've seen him before, so I'm aware of his history, I'll also be giving this to the lab to let you know what he's on, but I think I have a sense on what he might be on." Y/n says, disposing her gloves and needles. "Anyways, come find me if anything happens," she gives them both a smile and a wink at Gaz as she walks away.

Gaz looks at his partner who motioned his head to follow you. "Go on, I've got it from here," Gaz takes off down the hall seeing you go into a room.

He acted cool, walking by and seeing you bending down on your knees talking with a child patient. Gaz leans on the door as you talked so gently with the child. Giving the child a stuff animal to hold as you pricked their shoulder.

"There, all done," Y/n says. She looks at the parents. "I'll have her blood tested and I'll be back with the results."

"Thank you, Doctor."

"Of course, now...Olivia, I want you to hold on to this bear, he will help you with every Doctor appointment, just squeeze him and everything will be okay."

"Okay!" She gives Y/n a smile.

"Good...I'll be back," she turns and Gaz steps from the doorway.

"You spying, Kyle?" Y/n asked.

"No...just came to see if we are still having dinner at Sanders?" He asked.

"Yep, nothing has changed as far as I'm aware," she smiles up at her husband.

"Okay good...ummm~ sorry for bring another druggy."

"No, you're not, it's your way of saying I love you and it's an excuse to come and see me."

"....Yeah~ you're right," he says with an awkward smile.

"Oh, Aubrey can you take this blood sample to the lab please?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Thank you, I also need the results by 12!"

"GOT IT!"

"Busy day?" Gaz asked her.

"Just a bit," she says, she looked around and stood on her tippy toes and kissed her husbands lips. "I'll see you in a little bit, go watch your suspect, officer Garrick."

"I will, Doctor Garrick." He says as they both walked away from each other.

Gaz was swooned seeing his wife for the millionth time this week. As he made it back to the room, Price could see cupids above Gaz's head.

"Hey, calm down now, you'll see the missus when you get home, Garrick," Price says as he stood with his arms still cross over his chest watching the drugged man.

"Doctor Y/n, your patient in room 5's blood is back..."

"What is he on?"

"He is running on many...drugs ma'am."

"Name them and tell me what his blood level is at."

"Heroin, meth and we think cocaine, he also has some pills in his diet, looks like anti-depressants, and Ibuprofen, and his blood level he is over 4 times the legal limit...ma'am I think he was trying to overdose..."

"I see..." Y/n took the test from her assistants hands and walks back to the room. "I have your tests," she flashes the clipboard to both officers looking at the man.

"Goddamn," Price says, reading the chart.

"We think he might have been trying to overdose."

"Oh without a doubt," Price says.

"If you two weren't there to control the situation, I think if he would have taken one more thing, he would have died, I mean, he's on the verge with the amount of shit in his blood right now."

"Agreed, we'll have to place him under arrest and send him to the Prison and he'll have to wait for a judge to see him."

"It's the weekend, so he'll be in there till Monday," Gaz says.

"Yep," Price pops the 'P'. The man stirs in his sleep and looks at Y/n and the two officers.

"Where am I?"

"The hospital," Y/n says.

Then all of sudden Price and Gaz walk over to him placing his hands behind his back and cuffing him.

"W-W-Wait, what's going on? I haven't done, anything-"

"Illegal usage of drugs, misconduct, battery on an officer, illegal possession of illegal narcotics." Price cuts him off to tell him everything he's been charged with.

"Doc, come on now, you can't let them take me-"

"Your chart says how many drugs were in your system, you were trying to overdose, and if these officers didn't get to you in time, you would be dead by now, unfortunately there is nothing I can do," Y/n tells him as Price walks him out of the hospital and to the cruiser.

"Thank you for your help, love."

"Of course," she leans forward kissing his lips. "Be safe."

"I always am."

----------

3 Weeks Later

Price and Gaz walk into the hospital, Price and Gaz were not happy campers right now. They had gotten a call from the hospital saying that there was man asking for narcotics that only the hospital can supply.

He's been harassing the staff since 10 in the morning, and Price and Gaz have dealt with this guy before in the past always jumping from hospitals to hospitals always asking them them to supply him with random drugs.

This time it was-

"MORPHINE!!! I NEED MORPHINE!!" He yells.

"Hey! Austin!" Price yells catching his attention. "We've talked about this bud, no hospital is going to supply you with any sort of drug, that you don't need-"

"I AM A PATIENT HERE, I NEED MORPHINE!!"

"You are not a patient here, Austin," Gaz jumps in. "Are you high again?"

"NO!"

"Then come on, let's leave and let these nice people do their jobs-"

"THEY CAN DO THEIR JOBS BY GIVING ME MORPHINE!!" Austin raised his hand slamming them on the desk scaring the woman behind it, she shakes and both Gaz and Price pull out their tasers.

"On the floor Austin! You've overstepped your welcome, now on your knees now!" Price yells at him.

Austin soon turns and starts to charge at both of them, they both released their tasers making Austin fall to the ground. Price jumping on his back and putting his hands behind his back and Gaz gave him cuffs for Austin.

"KYLE! Y/N WAS HURT!!" A nurse yells for Gaz. Price nods allowing him to go check on his wife.

Y/n sat on an empty patients bed, gripping the thin bedsheet as a nurse of hers was stitching up her arm.

"Love," Gaz comes in, hugging her side.

"Ow, easy."

"I'm sorry, are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm fine."

"What the hell happened?" Gaz turns to the nurses but Y/n started to talk.

"I thought he was regular patient, I've never seen him before, so I wanted to know if he needed help with anything, and he was...acting normal and then when he told me, he was here for a physical and I was getting everything I need, he then just started to shout 'I need morphine' over and over. When I tried to die down the situation, he grabbed a blade, like a razorblade from his coat pocket and sliced my arm pretty good."

"She didn't lose too much blood," a nurse tried to reassure.

"His name is Austin Hill, he's known for going around random hospitals always asking for a random narcotic you can't get from the streets, just last week he went to Downtown Abby and asked a nurse for Majorana and when she told him she couldn't do that for him, he went ape-shit, now he'll be under careful watch," Gaz said.

"Come on, Gaz we've got some booking to do-Y/n you wanna make a statement?"

"Yes, please," she says as Gaz gave her a pen and paper waiting for her to be done writing. He takes the paper and pen from her leaning down to kiss her and rushing out of the room.

"I'll see you later love!"

----------

An Hour Later

"Got another one for you, love," Gaz says as him and Price held up a woman who seemed to be...limp.

"Umm~ can she walk?" Y/n asked.

"She did..." Price starts.

"She collapsed on her way in," Gaz ends.

"Jesus-okay, get her to room 8," Y/n says.

The officers placed her on the bed, she has this...sort of creepy smile on her face, eyes widened and haven't blinked so far, she was still limp as Y/n did her usual exams on her.

"Umm~ a-are you guys sure she's not dead?" Y/n asked, writing everything down.

"Pretty sure," Price grabs her wrist feeling for a pulse. "It's slow," he says, dropping her wrist.

"Miss? Ma'am...are you okay? Hello?" Y/n asked, the woman's head turned to look at Y/n she jumps a bit from how creepy this woman was.

"You have a horn coming from your forehead."

"Edibles," Y/n immediately says with a straight and serious look on her face.

"I knew it," Gaz says, poking at Price's chest.

"Do you need any blood samples to convict?"

"Nah, we'll let her off with a warning," Gaz says. "Go ahead and knock her, love," he says, placing his hands on his belt.

"Will do," she uncapped a needle sticking it into the woman's arm, she slowly started to drift to sleep. "She'll wake up in an hour or so," Y/n tells both officers.

"Good-how's your arm, love?" Gaz asked, gently taking her hand.

"It's fine, I just can't do a whole lot at the moment."

"When's your break?"

"In 20 minutes."

Gaz looks at his partner and Price nods letting him know, he can take a break with his wife.

-----------

Y/n and Gaz sat outside in the courtyard eating some sandwiches, and chips. She giggled at Gaz's comments about the people he works with along with some random drama at the station, one being a cop and a possible inmate having an affair together.

"That's crazy," Y/n says.

"I know, so they are talking about transferring her to another station away from the jail," Gaz says.

"Good, you don't know what she could do for him while he's in jail."

"They've already confiscated two phones, toothpicks he could easily stab someone with, and a few shanks, he was in solitary confinement for 3 months," Gaz takes a chip in his mouth. "Anything crazy here, besides your arm?"

She just giggles. "Not really...so, I have a question?"

"Go ahead," he chuckles.

"When you're on patrol, and you get the call to go check up on something?" She questions her wording. "Why do you and Price always get the narcotics calls?"

"I don't know? I can do others like traffic stops, domestic violence cases, and others, but I'm not sure why we always get the narcotics calls," Gaz says.

"Well, my breaks almost up," she says.

-------------

Later That Night

Y/n was clocking out, telling her collogues 'goodbye' and 'have a good night.' She walks out of the hospital and looks around for her husbands car, she soon sees it pulling up to the sidewalk where she stood.

"Kyle," she coos and opens the passenger side door.

"I wish you'd let me open the door for you, so I can be a true gentleman."

"I am an independent woman," she says, moving the seat belt over her body.

"Oh I know, baby," he says, leaning forward and kissing her lips. "Let's go home, I want you to rest after what happened today, I know you pushed yourself today."

"Just a bit, I am tired," she yawns and let her head rest on the window as she watched the pretty lights of lit up building, apartment complex's pass by her window.

Soon her eyes were closed as Gaz drove them to their shared home. The golden lit up street lamps lit up the neighborhood and Gaz pulls into the driveway, gently shaking her thighs waking her up, she yawns and lets out a soft moan. Making grabby hands towards her husband.

"Hang on, baby," he says, going around the car and opening it, unbuckling his wife from her seat, and he bridal carries her into the house. "An independent woman, huh?"

"Shut up," Y/n says, snuggling into her husbands neck and giving her some soft kisses making him shutter.

------------

A Few Days Later

Y/n had stayed home from work since the incident, she stayed on the couch most of her time, her husband working, and coming home every break just to come and check up on her.

"Baby, I brought you some sushi," Gaz says, coming into the house, Y/n peaking over the back of the couch with a big smile.

"Thank you, Kyle. When is your break over?"

"In a few minutes, I brought Price with me, so we can head out immediately," Y/n stood up off the couch seeing Price sitting in the cruiser in the driveway. She waves to him and he waves back.

"Thank you again, Kyle, but I'll be okay, no need to come and check on me, I have your number if anything happens, and I have Price's number in case I get ahold of you, I promise, okay?"

"I know, baby, but I just want to make sure nothing happens while I'm gone on duty and something does happen."

"I'll be fine," Y/n kissed her husband, letting him get back to work, she ate her lunch and thanked him again for her food.

[wordstome]

the very first night (ntwdt pt 2)

tell me that you hate it hate that i'm no longer in your reach if i can't hear you say it maybe you can't change it, but if you never if you never put it on the line how am i gonna sign for it?

alpha colonel König x beta ex-lover reader

2nd person, no y/n, she/her pronouns, reader's callsign is Eden, reader speaks French, omegaverse, exes to lovers, fraternization, fantasy version of military protocol, probable incorrect use of "copy"

2.2k words

tw: mentions of dead bodies and vague violence, dirty talk, könig is in rut but no actual sex happens, mention of grinding

Do you guys still even remember this au??? 😅 I'm back to writing this fic with this specific format just like the last time I had bad writer's block. I'm sorry that I basically made you guys take a poll and then immediately disregarded the results :( metalhead König is going to be the next one published, and then kosovo maiden. Anyway, this is less of a foray into the omegaverse as it is into exploring a married couple's dynamic. Forgive me if it's inaccurate, I've never been married. (Several of the people who will probably read this are married so...I might be really embarrassing myself here lol)

“Two on your six, O’Conor.”

König watches as his colleague takes down his pursuants with practiced ease. “Good to have someone watching over me, Eden.” the man roughs into his comms.

“It was my pleasure, Declan.”

“Can you two keep the flirting off the main comms?” Fender huffs. König hears O’Conor snort before the line goes quiet.

“Steady,” Horangi says next to him.

“What?” König says.

“You’re breathing like an angry bull. It’s unnerving.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It’s obvious you’re mad O’Conor’s flirting with your ex-wife.”

“She’s not—“ König lets out a sigh of defeat and tips his head away from the scope. “She can do whatever she wants. I’m not her keeper.”

“Right, which is why you’re white-knuckling your rifle and giving off the most furious pheromones I've ever felt."

König gives his friend a deadly side eye. “Can I help you?”

“Nah. Just confirming what I already know”, Horangi answers, unbearably smug.

König rolls his eyes and returns to the task at hand.

The two of you avoid each other, mostly.

When you’re forced to interact, it's with stiff professionalism. Cold and distant. The way it was when it was really, really bad.

You spend your time becoming closer to the other operators. O'Conor, for one, is someone you find yourself growing close to. In your line of work, it's usually not a good idea to get too attached to someone who may not see the next day, but it's part of your job to know these people now.

They're so competent that you can ignore the obvious, anyway.

König's always been competent, but watching him work nowadays is strange, like watching a remake of a nostalgic childhood film.

His movements are the same. He flicks his wrist the same way, with a heartbeat's worth of pause before the movement. Him taking cover, leaning with that awful posture you always got on his case about.

But everything about him is more ruthless, more efficient. The unrefined brutality of his youth is replaced with a honed precision that is foreign to you.

It stings, though you know the feeling has no right to exist.

You can't keep yourself from reminiscing about the past, when everything about him was familiar. When you knew him so well, it was enough to save both your lives.

"We've lost comms with König."

Your heart drops into your throat. You've been on several ops with him at this point, but this has never happened before.

"What do you mean you've lost comms?"

"He's not responding."

"What?" Fear grips your heart at everything that implies.

"He's in your building, Eden. Find him and extract. Copy."

You move slowly, like ice is flowing through your veins. "Copy."

You will yourself to calm down. Lost communications doesn't mean anything but lost communications. Panicking that you're going to encounter his body will only ensure you end up as a corpse as well. Besides, who could ever take down a man like that, tall like a giant and quick like a viper as he is?

If you had lost comms, what would you do? Re-establish them, of course. Pick your way out of the building and do everything in your power to reconnect with your team. From where König entered, he'd be exiting the building on the east side. You turn to head that way, then hesitate.

König's not you, though. He's not like any other member of the team. Proud, arrogant, vicious König, far more so than other alphas. You used to be afraid of him while he was at work, but eventually you came to realize that was simply how he was in his element—a different persona he wore to battle. As much as you wished he would be sensible and take the safe route, König would never take the safe route. He'd be carrying on the mission on his own, moving towards the target at the center of the building.

But he's a professional. No matter how good he is at what he does, he's not a one-man army, and he knows the right thing to do would be to extract. It's a gamble. If you head towards the east exit and he's not there, you could be losing precious time to find him. But if you head towards the center, you could be walking right into a fight you can't win and become overwhelmed.

You let out a shaky breath and attempt to calm your mind. What would he do? What is he thinking? If you make the wrong call, if you don't know your lover as well as you think you do, one of you won't be walking out of here. You close your eyes and think.

You open them with newfound determination and turn towards the center of the building.

You'd been right, of course, judging by the fallen enemies you find as you move through the hallways. But you don't allow yourself to feel sure until the moment you lay eyes on him, securing the target—a hard drive containing sensitive information.

"König!" you hiss, just as he whips towards you, gun drawn. He relaxes when he sees it's only you. Despite the fraught situation you're in, you can't help yourself from dashing towards him and burying your face into his chest in a hug.

"Eden," he says, his relief evident.

"You stupid motherfucker," you hiss. "You should have extracted the moment your comms cut out."

His eyes crinkle up behind his mask the way they always do when he smiles. "You knew I wouldn't."

"Yes, because I am burdened with being one of the few people on this earth who knows you like the back of my hand. Atlas holding up the sky," you grumble.

"I know you're relieved to see me," he responds, joy evident in his tone.

You let out a sigh. "Can we just get out of here?"

"Aye-aye, captain."

You could do without those memories, you think whenever the two of you trade clipped exchanges during ops now.

König still has traces of the arrogance of his youth, but it shows through less now. He's wiser, more patient and far less reckless.

You catch yourself admiring how good of a leader he's become. His connection with his teammates is like muscles flexing a hand.

You're no longer a part of that nervous system.

In fact, he's always catching you off guard now.

The energy in the common area is weird today.

You can’t quite put your finger on it. It’s like everyone’s walking on eggshells, but at the same time, nobody’s mood seems to be that affected. It’s like you’re all mice living in someone’s walls: going about business as usual, but with some looming threat casting a pall over everything.

“Is it just me or does the energy on base feel off today?” you ask Calisto.

“Oh. Yeah, that. Don’t worry about it,” she says. She swings open the refrigerator and pulls out coffee creamer. “No need for concern. König’s in rut.”

You do a double take. “He is?”

“Yeah.” She’s casual about it as she dumps cream and sugar into her coffee. “Usually he has a pretty light rut—he just gets testy and irritated. But for some reason this time is bad.” She offers you the cream, but you shake your head. “Don’t know what’s up with him, but he had to barricade himself in his room. His scent is driving people up the wall.”

You stare at the table in front of you. It can’t be a coincidence that König’s rut gets worse as soon as you’re near him again, can it?

When you look up, Horangi is staring at you from across the room. Slowly, he raises his mug to his lips, never once taking his eyes off of you.

You swallow the lump in your throat.

Calisto was right. The scent is overwhelming, but it's also familiar. You can't blame the others for avoiding the area. If you'd never dealt with him in this state before, you'd be hightailing it out of there too. Which is why you're doing this despite...everything.

You hover outside his door, trying to gather yourself, or work up the nerve to knock, or anything. It doesn’t matter in the end, though.

“I can smell you, liebling,” comes his voice, deep and growling and verging on feral. A shiver runs up your spine. You haven’t been called that in a long, long time.

“I only came here to bring you things. Water and…snacks.” you stammer, instantly hating yourself for how weak you sound.

“All these years later…and you still smell the same.” He blows right past your feeble little excuse, not even dignifying it with a response.

“I’m just here to check on you,” you murmur.

“Is that so.” You gasp as you hear a loud thud against the door from the other side. Oh God, it’s him, his body heat almost burning through the wood, pressed so close that you can hear his heaving breaths. “How kind of you.”

“It’s the least I can do, considering…”

“Considering it’s your fault I’m like this in the first place?”

Your legs feel weak. “Yes.”

His voice is silky, dangerous despite the barely restrained lust behind it. “Good girl.”

“That’s not fair,” you whisper.

“That’s a shame. You used to like it when I called you that. Still do, according to my nose.”

You wish he wasn’t right, but he is. You’re so slick that you’re soaking your underwear.

“Do you want the water or not?”

“Are you going to come with it?”

“I—”

“Because I promise you, if you’re still standing there when I open this door, you will get fucked against it.” He sounds like a savage animal snapping his jaws in hunger, and fuck, your body feels hot and weak in response. Every cell in your body is screaming out for you to throw open that door and let him fuck you limp. If you told him to break down the door, you’re sure that he would.

“You can’t say that anymore,” you whisper, hating the words as they leave you.

That seems to bring König back to rationality. You can picture him now on the other side of the door, shoulders slumping as he withdraws back into himself. "I...I'm sorry."

You slide down to sit on the ground with your back to the door, gripping a water bottle in a clenched fist. "It's like no time has passed at all, huh?"

You hear him let out a shaky breath, clearly trying to collect himself and bite back words he can't say. "Yeah."

That's the thing, isn't it? Your biology and his got the two of you into this situation in the first place. Very little of that has changed. Even though you've grown distanced in your minds, your bodies haven't forgotten the connection.

You're still struggling with how to feel about that. So much of your life has been dictated by what your body needs and wants. You've spent just as much time bucking against those needs and wants, so much that it feels like second nature.

"All of this...it takes me back. Do you remember the first night I spent with you during a rut?" you say. For a while you don't think he's heard you, but then he responds.

"How could I forget? It's my most embarrassing memory."

"Still?"

"I swore I would never let something like that happen again."

You giggle a little. "It was cute, for what it's worth." That first time, you'd come prepared with water and food, just like you had tonight, prepared for a long night full of...strenuous exercise. Instead, König had gotten so overwhelmed at his first rut with a partner that he came by just grinding on your leg and immediately fell into a 12-hour sleep.

"Yeah, you've said that. Doesn't make me cringe any less."

"And I'll say it again, it wasn't as bad as you think it is." You idly trace the cap of the water bottle with a fingertip. "There's no shame between us."

Another long pause before he responds. "Was."

A dull, throbbing pain nestles itself below your sternum.

"It...doesn't have to be past tense," you put forth tentatively.

"Doesn't it? We've gone right back to being strangers. You're still on the other side of the door."

You bite your lip. You can't deny that, nor the distance that's grown between the two of you.

This is all happening too fast. You don't know if you want to close the gap. You don't know if you're ready to make amends, after what happened.

"You're in no condition to have this conversation," you say, to distract both him and yourself.

"Conversation with you is hard to come by nowadays."

"Well...let's change that. Starting when your rut's over. Let's try talking like normal people again." This time, you don't know if you can blame your stupid biology for the relief you feel saying that. Maybe this time it's nothing but you and your treacherous heart.

You hear a thump against the door, but not an aggressive one. More like he's leaned his head against it. "I guess we have to start somewhere."

More silence. Then he speaks again, his voice tremulous.

"Can you stay? It's easier when you're here."

You swallow, your mouth gone dry like a desert. You can barely manage your next two words. "Of course."

The rest of the night is quiet, but you know he's there. At one point, you can even hear his steady, even breathing. Somewhere along the way, you notice that your breathing has synced with his.

The two of you fall asleep like that, propped up next to each other with a single layer of wood between you.

I miss you like it was the very first night...

I only revised this once while exhausted out of my fucking mind at 3am, so forgive me if anything's awkward or clunky. I'll probably go through it again in the morning (and die of cringe). But there we go! I hope you guys enjoy. As always, I would love to see your thoughts and comments <3

Regarding my tag lists: I've had to leave out a few people, so if you see your url missing from this, please let me know and I'll add you back. Also, apologies if you're here despite not asking to be tagged for this particular story. I haven't gotten around to sorting out fic-specific taglists yet 🥲

@kneelingshadowsalome @danibee33 @crowbird @poohkie90 @cumikering @iytatsworld @papaver-decervicatus @anxietyrain @cookiepie111 @no1runawaymilkdad @chthonian-spectre @backwards-readings @yxllowtxpe @hexqueensupreme @violetstyless @her-majesty-theking @vegan-peppermint @peonytarian @ghostslittlegf @deaddainish @teehee-47 @catluvwr @keiva1000 @waves-against-a-cliff @channelsoph @cutiecusp @itsagrimm @dins-riduur-anthe @mantishymns @lexuria @complexivelovely @black-moon-bunny @kit-williams @shebibtedmypepnis @mafer383

[roosterbruiser]

I am way, way early for sleepover day butttt this popped into my head and I’m curious to see what you can do with “This is my wife, Dr. Bradshaw. She’s been accused of stirring the pot before.”

(I, an aspiring PhD, am FERAL for being called doctor. I’m also curious what Dr. Bradshaw did. If it doesn’t spark inspo, are you studying anything? What was your favorite subject in school?)

standing at the bar, a smile tugging on your lips as the suns sinks into the ocean just outside, you sigh a happy sigh. you're off work for the next several days--which rarely happens--and that means you can spend every waking moment with your hunk of a husband.

he's currently losing a game of pool to Phoenix, who's tickled pink that you're here so Bradley won't pout all night, and stealing glances at you whenever he can chance it.

God, does he look good, too--that dumb Hawaiian shirt that really must have some sort of magic in it, a tight white t-shirt, blue jeans. he's tan and happy and warm and everything in the world that you love. and you're fairly certain that isn't just the Long Island iced teas talking. being married for the past three years hasn't really changed much at all for the two of you--you still daydream about him like a ditzy teenager. and he still gets flustered when you catch his gaze and wink--it's one of the things you love most about him; how easy you can make him blush.

"isn't he handsome?" you ask out loud to no one in particular--and you're fairly certain that it is because of the Long Island iced teas.

Jake Seresin happens to be standing beside you, waiting for Penny to finish up with another customer so he can get his first whiskey sour of the night, and he glances at you when he hears the dreamy lilt in your tone.

shit--you're hot. he doesn't know how he didn't notice you here before. for a quick minute, he racks his brain, trying to place you. he knows you're familiar--maybe a past fling or a match on tinder--but nothing's calling out to him.

he gives you a once-over, a sly one, and notices a few things: the way your breasts strain against the fabric of your tee shirt, the gloss over your eyes, the way those jeans hug your hips, and a wedding ring.

he follows your gaze to Bradley, who's gaping as Phoenix absolutely demolishes him in pool without so much as breaking a sweat, and frowns.

"eh," Jake answers, shrugging. he turns and catches your gaze, his brows slightly knit. "he's married, anyway."

oh. you recognize this guy from all of Bradley's stories--this is Jake. Hangman. you two seem to always just miss each other: you're out of town when he comes over for a football game, you're working at the hospital when he's on base, you're at the grocery store when he FaceTimes Bradley.

for a moment, you maintain his gaze, waiting for him to place you. but he's just staring at you blankly.

"married, huh?" you ask softly, leaning in closer to Jake. you make a show of looking all around Bradley and Jake's brows knit even further--you're brash for a married woman looking at a married man. "I don't see a wife?"

Jake scoffs softly, an incredulous smile tugging on his lips. surely you're joking. but then he keeps watching you eye fuck Bradley, teeth sunken into your lower lip, and he automatically straightens his spine.

"you're married too," Jake points out, nodding to your ring finger. he crosses his arms over his chest. "how'd your husband feel knowing you're eyeing a Navyman?"

"ooh," you sing-song, batting your lashes. "he's a man in uniform, too, huh?"

Christ. you're less shameless than him.

"and married," Jake repeats, frowning a bit now. "you know, like you. married. holy matrimony and all that. union. like, legally bound."

stifling a laugh, you give a very blasé shrug of your shoulders and bite your lip.

"all the good ones are taken," you say, wrinkling your nose. "don't you think I deserve a little fun?"

Jake fully scoffs now, aghast at your behavior. it takes everything in your body not to break character and introduce yourself. but you wanna see how far you can take this: you've heard stories about Jake. a shameless, over-confident creature who'll turn taken women into single women with a bat of his long lashes. and you've got him gaping at you like you're some sort of wild animal.

but before he can say anything else, Bradley finally wanders up behind you, pressing a few kisses to your cheek as he wraps his arms around your waist.

and that is about all Jake can take.

"listen, man, I don't know your wife but I'm sure she wouldn't be too happy about you kissing up on another married woman!" Jake says, hands on his hips. he's never been more disappointed in Bradley before. he feels like he's in the fucking Twilight Zone. Bradley "I Never Shut Up About My Hot Wife" Bradshaw shacking up with some stranger at the bar while his wife probably busts her ass at the hospital? no fucking way. "and I ain't gonna hold my tongue about it--I'll tell you that now."

when Bradley laughs, Jake just blinks at him. but then you're laughing, too, patting Bradley's chest.

"we almost had him!" you tell Bradley, shoving him playfully. "that vein in his forehead was starting to throb!"

instinctively, Jake slides a finger across his forehead. huh. maybe it was. how the fuck would you know about that vein, though?

"Jake," Bradley says with a grin. "this is my wife--Dr. Bradshaw. she's known to occasionally stir the pot."

beaming at a still-flustered Jake, you extend your left hand.

"pleasure's all mine."

[withered--s0uls]

Oh look it's another GD crossover

Ghost Drone AU - @electrozeistyking

You already saw all this art but shhh HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

This originally started out with me just wanting to draw Beanie interacting with the Intertwined Codes Kids but then I added some extra stuff lol.

If you're a reader of Intertwined Codes, this kinda sorta spoils future stuff bc only the twins have been mentioned in the Draft/Teaser fic but oh well. You have been warned.

IC!Uzi wouldn't like actually meet GD!N bc they'd kinda decide that "hey, let's not have the widowed man see an alternate version of his wife that actually got live." simply out of respect kinda?? So she would stick around at home with the kids whilst IC!N goes out to look for Beanies Dad after their kids drag her to them lmao.

So yeah she doesn't necessarily know the extent of the mans depression, the kids just mentioned there only being a dad so she just specifically asks about GD!N in this doodle

IC!N would quickly pick up on GD!N not being completely okay, even without being told any details. So he probably would end up sitting him down to talk on their way back to the IC!Doorman families place, wanting to help if he can in any way. (He runs a Daycare and tries to also be a support to any parent that needs it, so I feel he out of habit would lean into trying to do that with GD!N)

More/The kids under the Cut otherwise the post looks so long rip

I will go over each of these one by one (can'tdo close ups bc 10 image limit, I'll reblog this in a second with the close ups.)

Left are the Code-Related Nuzi kids, right are the adopted ones.

Code related kids

Zagi:

Not much to say, I'm still working out their personality - they're maybe 2-3 years older than Beanie, so they aren't too far apart in age. :)

Orita:

She's the sibling who started the trend of putting stickers on her siblings, so she DEFINITELY would do the same with Beanie.

She also probably originally was going to show her how to build a weapon, but her parents promptly stopped that lmao .

She would think it's really cool that Beanie has a custom core icon & in general is completely customized from the start! She herself was originally put into a regular worker body (just with the tail and headband being custom made by her mom), she had to build the DD forearms herself. She also has a sticker of the DD icon on her core, covering the WD icon :3

Rexim:

At this point he has enough siblings to be past the "ew a little kid" phase, so luckily Beanie gets spared that. His main camera is damaged, he only really uses his headband optics to look around, so he would kinda just look as if he's staring past her a lot. But bc of the obvious cracks in his visor I feel she would pick up on the fact he's not actually ignoring her.

Also he definitely would just play music to her, because IC!Uzi kinda always has music on whilst working in her workspace he kinda picked up some of her taste in music (Hence he's playing the same song that Uzi is shown to have been listening to in Ep7)

Raven:

First up THANK YOU Zeisty for helping me brainstorm silly stuff for them. They're a little ball of chaos now and I love them.

Anyways.

They would join Orita in bedazzling Beanie, and then they'd start talking about bird facts and also try to get Beanie to talk about her interests.

(Their height difference isnt 100% accurate bc halfway through drawing this I changed the IC timeline, making Raven about the same age as Zagi instead of them being a teen, so I kinda had to manually try and semi-fit their heights lol)

Adopted Kids

Ray:

Nothing to say. He's a baby. Tho whilst I was outlining this one I had to giggle because of how big he is in Beanies hands. She's so tiny 😭💕 /affectionate

Annika:

Oh boy. Ann.

Annika is the eldest kid & was adopted a while before Zagi was coded / whilst the parents were organizing the code copies for Zagi

She does NOT know how to talk to other kids. Never did. It made her stick out at the orphanage wing because she just avoided everyone. And it is very chaotic when Olivia and Ray first show up, because Ann's only idea of talking to other Drones is "well you got to be relatable" so she brings up the siblings dead parents bc like, her code parents are dead too. Both pairs dying to DDs. So yeah she probably would be the first, if not only one, in the whole household to just bring up GD!Uzi. She would do it like it's nothing either.

IC!Uzi would promptly get her to stop and sit her down having a conversation about "what did N and I say about trying to connect on that topic?"

Like IC!Uzi would actually feel really bad about it despite Beanie not knowing her mom. Bc she herself obviously didn't remember IC!Nori growing up but still didn't like the topic.

Olivia:

Olivia, as I said, was greeted with the topic of dead parents by Annika as well. So she probably would kinda interfere when IC!Uzi goes to sit Ann down to talk.

She would feel the need to apologize for the older girls behavior (which Ann would apologize for herself later too ofc) and would try to get Beanie to go play something together whilst IC!Uzi sorts that whole situation out.

She's also the closest to Beanies age probably, just was forced to mature bc of what happened to her parents, despite being taken in by Nuzi shortly after. She still obviously acts like a kid tho when comfortable, so I feel she would kinda ease up around Beanie and actually act more like a 4-5 year old around her.

Bonus? Bonus!

Needless to say Beanie would return home covered in stickers & hairpins (Orita & Raven have more than enough of those, they'd just let Beanie keep some)

RIP GD!N having to get her out of those stickers once they're back home

Also, for the "*humming*" variation of the picture I blame @k1k0oftheworld. Kiko was in vc with me when I was talking about how Beanie would be covered in stickers when she gets home, and saw the doodles as well.

He proposed the following scenario after seeing Rexim show Beanie IC!Uzis playlist:

Beanie humming dead batteries song & GD!N having a breakdown bc it reminds him of GD!Uzi

I do not take accountability for this, I was going to spare the poor widowed man.

(I scrapped the idea of him not knowing ab the IC!Doorman family and him getting a mini heart attack when Beanie goes "I met Mom today" in favor of him and IC!N meeting & talking - I WANTED TO SPARE HIS POOR HEART)

@k1k0oftheworld you owe him money for a therapy session now /silly

Anyways that's it, I'll put the close ups in the reblog like I said 👍

[j-eryewrites]

Kin

Part Six of A Sinner's Redemption

SERIES MASTER LIST| MAIN MASTER LIST

Previous | Next

Word Count: 16.8k

Author's Note: (EDIT) Dang, it's been forever since I've had the chance to write in general. I want to say thank you for all your patience with me. My health has been horrible, and school and work have been crazy, leaving me little time to do the things I enjoy. I really hope you enjoy this chapter!

Anyway, I'll stop talking and let you read on.

Warnings: Language, mentions of death, angst and all the feels (I MEAN A LOT OF ANGST), blood, violence, and gore (let me know if I missed anything)

꧁_____________꧂ 

Three Months Later...

One thing Ellie hated the most was when she was under-estimated. She was sure Piper felt the same way when Joel became all high and mighty,, wanting to face the "bad guys" by himself rather than having the two of them help out. Ellie knew she could hold her own. For Piper, there was no doubt, but after what happened in Kansas City, it seemed like Joel had changed. Now, whether it was for good or bad, Ellie was unsure, but right now, it was leaning more towards bad.

The woman was completely harmless. In fact, Ellie had been puzzled as to how this woman had survived this long. Even so, Joel pushed the girls behind him; gun raised as he told the woman what was going to happen. Afterwards, forced the girls upstairs to hide while they waited for the woman's husband to come home. Ellie grumbled at that. If the husband was anything like the woman, Florence as she introduced herself, then Ellie could take both of them down in under a minute.

Ellie groaned as her head banged against the bedpost. "How long is this gonna take?" she muttered under her breath. Her eyes peered over at her sister, wondering if she had heard Ellie's words. Instead, Piper seemed to be in her own world. She was leaning up against the wall. Her gun was in her lap and her hands grasped the sides of her forehead. Ellie's eyes squinted, unsure if her sister was in deep thought or pain.

"How long is this gonna take?" Ellie repeated, her head dropping to the side to emphasize her distaste for the situation.

Piper winced as she opened her eyes. "I heard you for the first time, El."

"Yeah, but you didn't respond., so I had to make sure you were still alive," Ellie smirked.

Piper rolled her eyes. "Jesus, you're giving me a headache."

Ellie opened her mouth to respond, but Joel's thunderous voice from downstairs cut her off: "Thought I told you two to be quiet."

"Yeah, Ellie. Be quiet," Piper smirked.

"You motherfu-" Ellie spat back.

"Hey!" Joel reprimanded. Florence began giggling to herself in the armchair she sat in. At the sound of her laughter, the girls grew quiet.

Suddenly, Florence's laughter died down. "He's home."

Ellie sat up straighter and nudged Piper with her foot. The two girls listened as Joel crept into the back room for the element of surprise. It wasn't long after that the door swung open. Heavy footsteps clanked against the cabin floor.

It was hard to see from the balcony. Ellie silently cursed, wanting to see what was going on below. Her curiosity peaked when she heard Joel speak, cocking his gun.

"-And the gun," Joel instructed.

"Who the hell are you?" The man defensively said. Ellie silently fussed at the inability to see without giving away her position. Piper couldn't care less about what happened downstairs as long as Joel didn't bite the dust.

"Just someone passin' through," Joel said. "Take the gun out, two fingers only, put it outta reach."

The man did as Joel instructed with a calm expression. He looked at his wife. "Why didn't you shoot him?"

Florence shrugged and motioned to where the gun sat in the corner of the room. "The gun's all the way over there. He didn't hurt me, by the way."

"Yeah, I got eyes," he replied. He caught sight of the table where three empty bowls lay. "You made him soup?"

"Yeah, I did. It's cold out," Florence replied.

Joel glanced between the two. They were conversing as if he wasn't there holding a gun to the two of them. "I'm lookin' for my brother," Joel interjected.

He looked Joel up and down and scoffed. "Well, I ain't seen him," he responded.

"I haven't told you what he looks like," Joel noted.

"He look anything like you?"

Joel shrugged, "A bit."

The man took off his coat and hung it up on the coat hanger. "Then I ain't seen him," he responds.

Florence smiled as she chimed in. "He's got two girls with him….” She said it like it was the biggest gossip she heard in twenty years.

"Can we come down?" Ellie asked, knowing Joel couldn't berate her for speaking up when Florence had exposed their presence. Besides, she had grown too stir crazy to keep sitting up there. Without hearing Joel's response, she jumped to the stairs and made her way down. Piper was slow to follow.

"No," Joel groaned into his hand. "Ellie! Piper!"

"Ooh-wa," Florence's husband chuckled. Florence began to giggle as well.

The girls stared at the man. He was old, just like his wife, but they weren't scrawny like most people. They were well fed, their skin a dark copper and dark hair to compliment it as well. If the world wasn't what it was, the girls might even consider the two to be normal. They might have been before the outbreak, but now they just seemed crazy with their nonchalant expressions.

"What did I just say?" Joel scolded the girls.

"Hey, I just came down 'cause she did," Piper explained.

Ellie sighed. "Joel, come on. They're, like, a thousand."

"Who are these little psychos?" The man asked.

Piper shot him a look. "I'm not little."

"But you are psycho," Ellie quipped. Piper elbowed her for the comment.

Joel rolled his eyes. "Never mind them," Joel told him.

"Who’s the bigger psycho?" The man asked with a grin on his face.

Piper and Ellie were rearing to get the first say when Joel announced loudly over them, "I need you to tell us where we are." He placed a wrinkled map on the table and pointed to it.

"If you got a map, why you lost?"

Ellie's face scrunched. " Must've missed all the street signs in the enormous fսcking forest," she hissed.

"Ho-ly," the man laughed.

Joel continued on. "We're somewhere here. Exactly where? And your answer better be the same as your wife's."

The man halted his laughter and looked at his wife. "Did you tell him the truth?"

She calmly rocked back and forth in her chair. "Yeah."

"Are you tellin' me the truth?"

Florence nodded, "Yeah." Her husband sighed and pointed to the location on the map.

Joel's jaw tensed. "Well, you found a great place to hide, I guess."

"Hide?" the man chuckled. " I came here before you were born, Sonny. Get the hell away from everybody."

"I didn't want to," Florence noted. Piper stifled a snort. The couple strangely amused her.

"Eh. Listen, I didn't mean to upset you about your brother," the man comforted, "but if you've come this far, then you know what's out there. You seen Cody?"

"Yeah, got close enough." Ellie shivered. "It's crawling with Infected."

The man nodded in confirmation. "Yeah, Laramie and Wind River Reservation. Anywhere people used to be, you can't go there no more."

"So you haven't heard the name Tommy?" Joel asked the man.

"Nope."

"What about the Fireflies?" Ellie piped up.

Florence smiled fondly, "We get those in the summer."

Piper sighed, "Not the bugs, the people."

"There are firefly people?" Florence asked. Then, she and her husband began to laugh again.

Joel was getting fed up with their laid-back attitude. "You got any advice on the best way west?"

"Yeah," the man said. "Go east. But you never go past the river here. Ever."

"What's past the river?" Piper questioned.

Florence glanced over at Piper; her face grew cold. "Death. We never see who's out there, but we see the bodies they leave behind. Some Infected, some not." Piper looked away. Something about the woman's stare sent chills down her spine. Florence turned to Joel. "If your brother's west of the river, he's gone."

Ellie scoffed as she crossed her arms across her chest. "You're not going to scare us," she says.

"Scared them," Florence corrected, motioning to Joel and Piper. Her husband laughed.

"Thanks for the soup," Piper muttered, hoping to change the newfound tension in the air. "It was delicious."

The rocking from the chair stopped as Florence replied, "No problem."

Without paying much more attention to Florence and her husband, Joel turned to the girls. His gun lowered. "Let’s go," Joel uttered.

Piper and Ellie shuffled around the cabin to follow Joel out the door. The cool winter air burned their cheeks as blood rushed to the surface to try and regulate their internal temperature. It was no use, but they were used to it by now. The relentless cold always nipped at their ears, cheeks, fingers, and toes. Even so, the girls shivered, their bodies craving the warmth from inside the cabin.

Ellie pulled her hat down hoping to drown her ears in the thick cotton. "You don't seriously believe them," Ellie joked, noticing Piper and Joel's abrupt silence once the cabin door closed.

Joel's feet trekked through the snow away from the cabin, not daring to look back. He wouldn't dare let himself miss the hospitality, the warmth, and the humanity of Florence's home. He didn't want to think about how comforting the sight of Piper and Ellie felt in a proper home with food. How he wished it could have been their home. No, Joel wouldn't think of that. He shouldn't. "They've lived here a long time," Joel responded, looking back at Ellie, whose hands were now full of rabbits. She had a gleeful smile on her face. "Put that back," Joel hissed.

"They'll be fine. Right, Piper?" Ellie nudged her sister, who still remained silent.

Ellie's weak forceful nudge nearly knocked Piper off her feet and into the cold, wet snow. The only response Ellie got was a warning glare from her sister.

"Sheesh,' Ellie shuddered as she placed back the rabbits. She began to mumble to herself. "They don't know anything. Never heard of the Fireflies. Bet they never knew about the outbreak when it first happened…"

"Ellie," Piper suddenly exclaimed, drawing her sister out of her disbelief.

It was strange. Joel had stopped walking. His hand tightly gripped the fence. His leather gloves creaked from the strain. Ellie quickly observed his rigid shoulders as they strained to go up and down.

"Joel?!" Piper's lips trembled. Her hands floated above Joel's back, and she was unsure if it was okay to touch him. The reflection of the snow illuminated the worry in her eyes.

Ellie darted beside Joel. His breathing was only getting harsher. "Joel? Joel? Joel, are you okay? Joel?!"

Piper shared a fearfully concerned glance with her sister. "Joel?! Come on, Joel, this isn't funny-"

"Shut up." The sound of Joel's voice silenced the girls. Joel clutched his chest right above his beating heart.

Ellie didn't miss the gesture of pain. "Holy shit, are you dying?"

"No, he's not. He's -Joel, you better fucking not die," Piper demanded. Panic was evident in her voice.

Joel withdrew his hand from his chest and waved it in the air in an attempt to soothe the girls' anxiety. "I'm okay," he said.

"Okay, are you okay?" Ellie asked.

"I'm fine," Joel hissed, not wanting the worry the girls had.

His tone only seemed to spur Ellie's increasing uneasiness. She stepped closer to Joel, who winced, feeling her shaking breath in his face. "No, no, but are you? Because just a reminder that if you're dead, we’re fսckеd."

"Ellie, give him some space!" Piper tried to yank Ellie back, but it was to no avail.

"No, the fucker’s dying on us."

Piper opened her mouth to respond when Joel's thick voice cut her off. "I said I'm fine."

The commanding tone repressed their paranoia but did little to subdue their concern. "Okay," they muttered in response.

"It's just the… cold air all of a sudden," Joel tried to reassure them.

Piper nodded, seeing right through Joel. It was something she had begun to pick up on all her time around the man. His little habits and tells. That's what happens when people go through hell and back together; some unspeakable bond grows. She hated to admit she had gotten accustomed to Joel's presence. She hated how she'd gotten lazy and dependent, a little less like a survivor and more like a, well, someone who was allowed to live. Almost. Piper wouldn't let herself get comfortable. She wouldn't grow attached. She wouldn't let Joel in, at least, not more so than he already had.

"All right, uh… so let's go and find Tommy and the Fireflies," Ellie said before marching through the snow.

"It's gonna be easy. All we have to do is cross the River of Death," Ellie sarcastically said as she got close to Piper's face. Piper rolled her eyes and shoved her sister. It made Ellie snicker.

Piper watched Joel continue to cling to the fence pole. She despised how her heart constricted at his hidden pain. What was worse was how her mind wildly pursued the question of the absence of Joel. It was an answer she never wanted to find. Maybe it was too late for Piper. Maybe Joel meant a bit more to her than she'd like. Reluctantly, Piper left Joel, her pace fast as she caught up with Ellie.

Joel watched both of them stomp through the snow. The shiny leather of Ellie's boots glistened under the winter sun, unlike Piper's worn and wilting boots, which repelled the sunlight. He glanced down at his own boots. It was a repulsing sight. The darkened soles were peeling along the edges, and the leather was frayed. They wouldn't last long. Joel just hoped they'd keep out the snow and ice for a little while longer.

꧁_꧂

Evening light trickled into the water. The water reflected the light as if it were made of diamonds. Accompanying the burst of opalescent colors was the thunderous sound water rushing past. The noise was deafening to Piper's ears. If it weren't for how close she huddled next to Ellie she wouldn't have heard the satirical comment she had made.

"The River of Death. Scary." Ellie turned away with a smile on her face. Piper and Joel peered over their shoulders at her, bearing the same annoyed expression. Ellie wasn't going to give up the bit. She was having too much fun.

"Don't start," Joel sighed.

Ellie giggled. The sound was infectious as it eased Piper's face into a soft smile.

"It's too close to dark," Joel noted. "There's some caves along the river. We'll set up camp there, cross in the morning'."

"Good. I'm starving," Piper added. Her stomach rumbled.

"Should've stolen two rabbits," Ellie mumbled.

"We can get our own rabbits," Joel said. His hands grazed his hips as they trekked further along.

Ellie practically jumped in front of him. "You gonna teach me how?" She beamed up at Joel.

Piper awaited Joel's response, even more so than Ellie. She had never learned how to hunt. There was never really the need back in the QZ. Even if it wasn't plentiful, food was always provided to her and Ellie. She knew the basics behind it: take a gun or trap, shoot, skin or prep, and eat. However, there was something foreign about hunting animals. All she'd ever shot were Infected people. Piper was a killer. She wondered if she could ever be a hunter or if she was forever cursed to kill.

"Just keep movin'," was all Joel said. Ellie sighed in disappointment.

Finding a suitable cave for the night hadn't taken them long. It was large enough to provide them shelter but not deep enough to house anything deadly. Joel had gotten busy building a fire. He had sent the girls off to get firewood a while ago, which they had done, but they had been absent since then.

The fire crackled, its flames dancing around as the smoke rose into the night sky like a prayer for all to see. They were so far out from any civilization that Joel wasn't too worried about the smoke. Even so, he kept his gun beside him, his hand on the barrel.

Joel watched the fire. His eyes froze over as they became entranced with the flames. His eyes dared to follow the smoke as it merged with the night sky above. That's when he spotted his girl's tattered coats. Joel frowned. The girls, he corrected himself. They weren't his. They were cargo, and that's all they would ever be. It was a delusion he hoped would become a reality so long as he kept saying it. The girls. His eyes focused on them as they gazed up at the night sky. He could see the awe in their eyes. They seemed at ease as the stars twinkled above them.

How long has it been since Joel looked up? He could recall a time when he'd watch the stars with Sarah. He refused to spare them a glance, knowing she was in the heavens alongside the stars. Yet, he found himself looking up. If his girls were watching, he wanted to watch them together.

His girls. The girls. The girls. THE GIRLS.

A clear whistle escaped Joel's cracked lips. His fingers fell as Piper and Ellie peered at him from the boulder. "Come down from there. You're gonna break your neck," Joel instructed.

He watched as the girls grunted slowly, descending the rock. Their feet hit the ground, and slowly, they crept to a seat by the fire. They welcomed the heat as it warmed them to their bones and fought back the deadly chill of the night. Piper sniffled and shivered, inching her body closer to the fire.

Meanwhile, Joel leaned back against a log. His body ached from all the use and travel. He was getting too old for him. Just like his tattered boots, he felt like he was falling apart. Reaching into his bag, he pulled out some duct tape and taped his boots. With his teeth, he cut the tape and put the finishing touches on his makeshift repair. Immediately after, he replaced the tape for his flask, taking a swig.

"Ahh…," Ellie muttered,, noticing the flask. "Can I have some?"

"No," Joel and Piper said.

Ellie began to wonder if they were the same person. "What? Just to warm up. C'mon," she begged, flashing her puppy eyes. Joel sighed, caving to Ellie's demands. She eagerly snatched the flask from Joel and took a sip. Her face scrunched up with disgust as she fought not to spit out the liquid. "Yep… still gross," she coughed. Her arm reached forward to hand it back to Joel when Piper intercepted.

"Give me," Piper said. Joel gave her a look, and Piper rolled her eyes. "What? If Ellie got a sip, why can’t I?" Again, Joel caved, and Piper took the flask. She unscrewed the lid and gulped down a sip with an expression of familiarity. It was an expression that drew fascination from her sister and concern from Joel. Piper tossed the flask back to Joel, the weight of which felt heavy in his hands.

"So, I've been thinking," Ellie began. "Let's say we find the Fireflies; it all works. They draw my blood and put it through some of their fancy machines to make a cure."

"Okay?" Joel said.

"Then what?" Ellie pondered. Joel flashed her a look of confusion. "Like, what do we do?"

His heart clenched and a thought of elation filled his mind. His girls. Internally, he shook his head. The girls, he corrected his thoughts. "Oh, it's we?"

Ellie covered the frown threatening to appear on her face. "Okay, fine. Whatever. You. You can do anything you want. Where are you going? What are you doing?"

Joel shrugged as he fiddled with the flask. "It's never been an option." Clearing his throat, he continued, "Maybe… an old farmhouse, some land… a ranch."

"Cool. What kind?" Ellie asked.

Joel's brows furrowed in thought before he responded, "Sheep. I would raise sheep. Sheep. They're quiet… do what they're told."

Ellie and Piper snickered, taking the hint. "Yeah, yeah. Okay," Ellie repeated, "So, just you and a buncha sheep. Romantic."

Joel sat up, placing the flask away. "And what about you two? Where are you gonna go?"

"Don’t know," Piper replied. She had always gone where Ellie went. They were always together; as long as Piper had Ellie, she'd be fine. As long it was the three-two of them. Using her elbow, she nudged her sister. "Ellie?"

Ellie gazed up at the sky as she answered. "It's probably because I grew up in the QZ. Behind you, there's the ocean, and ahead of you, there's a wall. Nowhere else to look but up." Joel couldn't help but follow her gaze. The stars waltzed between the dark blues and blacks of the night sky. "I read everything I could in the school library. Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Jim Lovell. But you know who my favorite is?"

"Sally Ride," Joel and Piper say instinctively.

Ellie beamed at their answer. "Sally fսckin' Ride! Best astronaut name ever." The fire cracked loudly, leaving a deafening silence of if: If the cure worked. If life could ever return to normal. Ellie wasn't even really sure what normal was supposed to be. The closest she'd ever gotten to it was watching Florence and her husband. "It'll work, right?" Her voice was quiet and unsure as she spoke. "The vaccine?"

"It's a little late to start wonderin'," Joel stated.

"I tried," Ellie blurted. "…with Sam and…" Her gaze traveled over to her sister's arm where she had been bitten. It hadn't worked with Sam, but she had saved Piper. Ellie was sure of it. Her blood was the cure. She gave up every single drop if it meant that she could save what was left of her world. This cruel world, the Infected, the fungus, had taken everything from her: Her mom, Riley, Tess, Sam, and Henry. She refused to let that list have the names "Piper" and "Joel" written on it.

"Tried what?" Joel wondered.

"I knew he was infected,” Ellie admitted. "I rubbed some of my blood into his bite." Ellie could feel the stares Joel and Piper were giving her. She didn't dare look at them. "I know, I know, it was stupid. But I… I wanted to save him." She couldn't save Sam, but she would save everyone else.

"Well, I reckon it's a lot more complicated than that," Joel admitted. "Marlene, she's a lotta things, but… she's no fool. If she says they can do it, they can do it."

Ellie absently nodded at Joel's words. She was gonna save the world. Then she'd never have to lose anyone again. She wouldn't be alone.

On the other hand, Piper's mind began contemplating what Joel had said. The word "complicated" echoed in her head. She couldn't help but wonder what Marlene really had in store for her and Ellie. "You wanna take first watch or second?" Piper sighed, knowing her paranoid thoughts about what the cure entailed would get her nowhere.

"I'll do both," Joel told them, sitting up straighter and bringing his gun into his lap.

"Joel…," Piper pleaded with the memory of Joel clutching onto the fence like a lifeline still in his mind.

He brushed her off as he stood up. "Get some sleep. Dream of…," Joel smiled as he looked down at his girls. He'd let his delusions go for one night. "…sheep ranches on the moon."

"I will," Ellie smiled back up at him. Piper sat silent.

"That includes you, Piper. Get to bed," Joel said.

Piper sighed and looked deep into the firelight. "I’m not tired just yet."

Reluctantly, Joel turned away from the fire and his girls stepped into the cold winter night doing his round of patrol, leaving the girls to doze off by the fire side with each crunch of the snow beneath his feet. By the time he returned, Ellie was quietly snoring into her shoulder. Her small body cuddled close to Piper, whose arm was wrapped around her sister.

Joel resumed his seat by the fire. His joints flared as the heat of the fire slowly sank back into them. "Thought I told you to get to bed."

"Thought I told you I wasn't tired," Piper spat back.

Joel's eyes widened. "Look, Kid. You need the sleep more than I do."

Piper sniffled and wiped her nose drawing her legs closer to her body. "You sure about that?"

Joel looked away, finding his tongue trapped in his throat. Instead he found words for something else. "What's your dream?" Piper flashed Joel a confused look. "You never answered what you would do if it all worked out."

Piper bit her lip, her eyes fell down on Ellie's sleeping figure. "All I've ever…Have you ever thought you were cursed?" Joel shook his head. "I think I'm cursed. Actually, I know I am," Piper scoffed.

"Cursed?" Joel questioned.

"To kill." Piper pulled her arm away from Ellie and stared at her shaking hands. In the light of the fire, they only grew more red, A dark red that seemed to seep underneath her skin. She shuddered. "It's all I was used to in the QZ. It's all I've known." She couldn't bear to look at her hands any longer, instead resorted to shoving them under her legs. "I'm cursed to kill when all I want is to save…but I can't." her voice caught in her throat. "I can only save Ellie. She's all that matters. So, as long as I can do that, I'll be fine."

"Kid," Joel paused. "Piper." The sound of her name drew her attention. "You are more than a sister. You can want something for yourself that is outside of Ellie."

Piper scoffed. "Says you. You've been on and on about Tommy. What about you then? What is your dream outside of Tommy?"

"I-" Joel began to refute Piper's words, but something stopped him. She was right. He'd started this whole thing for Tommy: picked up the girls, lost Tess, danced with death, saw the impossible, and all for someone who could be dead. Piper and him were one in the same. As long as their family was safe and happy, so would they be. But as Joel really pondered her question, the dream of the farm came back into mind. The farm with the quiet sheep, the peaceful life. Except now, this dream had room for more, yet Joel wasn't sure if there was room for his girls in the first place.

"It's getting late," Joel remarked,,, standing up again to watch. This time, Piper didn't refuse sleep. Instead, she let the silence close in on her as the warmth of the fire cascaded over her body. The only sign of life was the slow rise and fall of her chest, the rhythm to which Joel stepped as he guarded his girls from the looming horrors of the night.

꧁_꧂

"Should we wake him up?" Ellie asked, craning her neck up to look at the boulder's ledge. The morning sun shone brightly in her eyes, painting Piper's figure as a shadow.

Piper was standing tall on the boulder with her gun in hand. Her dark eyes surveyed the area before glancing down at Ellie and shaking her head. "Nah, he'll wake up on his own. Besides, the man needs his beauty sleep." She quietly chuckled to herself.

Ellie shrugged and peered down at Joel, who was sleeping on the ground close to her. She watched as his brows furrowed and his forehead creased. She stepped closer to Joel, now hearing the incoherent mumblings that spilled from his mouth.

The sound of the earth crunching beneath Ellie's feet stirred Joel awake. He sat up with a hiss of air as his hands fumbled for his rifle.

"Still mumbling in your sleep," Ellie said. Joel looked up at her and noticed his gun in her hands. "I woke up early. You were passed out, so I took second watch."

Joel frowned.

"I helped!" Piper announced from atop the boulder. Her eyes winced from the sound of her own voice, intensifying the pounding in her head.

His eyes followed the sound of Piper's voice. The harsh sunlight invaded his senses as he tried to look up at her. "You gotta wake me up if that happens. And get down from there!" He scolded the girls.

"Piper told me not to," Ellie defended.

With a huff, Piper hopped down from the rock. "You need sleep too, Joel."

Joel rolled his eyes and snatched his gun away from Ellie. "You girls can't do things like this," he told them.

"But I can…," Ellie noted. "…'cause I just did."

It was much too early in the morning for Joel to be dealing with this already. A heavy sigh escaped his chest. "I'm responsible for you too, okay?" He looked between the girls.

Ellie shrugged. "Then don't fall asleep." Joel opened his mouth to refute her words again. However, Ellie did what she did best and continued to talk. "I was quiet. I checked my six. I looked for tracks. I found the high ground, and I kept watch. Like you taught me to," Ellie explained.

Joel bore a skeptical look on his face. "She did," Piper disclosed. "I checked."

"What can I say, man? I'm a natural." Ellie flashed Joel a smug smile. Piper gave a smile of her own.

The longer he looked at them, the harder it was to reprimand them. "Uh-huh. You wake me up next time," Joel instructed.

"Yes, sir. attention!" Ellie joked,, raising her hand to her head. Piper followed suit, stifling her snickers, and Joel couldn't help the smile that leaked onto his face.

"Alright, grab your stuff, and let's go." Joel motioned to their packs on the ground. The girls silently groaned as they shuffled to retrieve their things, knowing only more walking was ahead of them.

꧁_꧂

It was supposed to be pitch black in Ellie's and Piper's shared room. After all, it had been hours since the “lights out” signal, but even so, there was a faint glow seeping out from the walls-glow in the dark stars. It had been a gift from Levi. He had told Piper that he'd found them one day and thought she might like them. With a grin on her face, she took them to Ellie, and together, they put them on the walls and ceiling of their room.

Magic was how Ellie described it, and Piper couldn't think of a better word as the two would gaze upon their own personal stars. Some nights, Piper would even make a wish right as her eyes, filled with too much sleep, couldn't bear to look at them any longer. She'd wish for things like a real family and a home. Somewhere out of the QZ. Somewhere free, maybe some animals too. She'd always loved animals, but their presence was almost non-existent.

However, tonight, as Piper trickled into the room after hours, she didn't want to wish on the stars. She didn't want to even look towards their light. All she wanted to do was tear them down. Her feet slowly dragged on the hardwood floors over to the nearest star. Raising her hand, she yanked it down. It felt so good hearing the snap of the adhesive as the force pulled them to the ground, darkening their light. She pulled another and another with no care for the red marks she left on the wall. She kept pulling and pulling until she heard Ellie's bed creak.

"Pipe?" Ellie croaked. Her voice crackled from the cold. Piper winced. A blanket. She was supposed to grab another blanket for Ellie. Their room was freezing, and the cold, she knew, could be deadly at night.

"Yeah?" Piper replied.

"Why are you taking down our stars?"

Piper grew so quiet that Ellie wasn't even sure she heard her sister breathing. "It's late, Els. Why are you up?"

Ellie shuffled in the bed. Piper could hear the sheets shake with her shivers. "I was scared. You have left."

"I'm here now. Just go back to bed."

Ellie sat up and reached for a book underneath her pillow. She held it out to Piper, who knew exactly what book it was. "Can you read to me?" Ellie pleaded.

Piper sighed and nodded. She stepped forward to grab the book when the red on her hands became apparent. Even in the dark, the red seemed to be even darker. She could see it all covering her entire body. Slowly, she recoiled from Ellie and changed; Using her soiled clothes to wipe away as much as possible from her face and hands. Eventually, she returned to Ellie, freshly changed. She took the book in her hand and, with the other, tugged her own blanket off her bed and climbed into Ellie's. Piper took extra care to lay the second blanket on top before opening the book.

She had read it so often that there was hardly a need for a light to see the words. As she began to recite the myths and tales of the stars, Piper began to like the dark, to find comfort in the night. The more she whispered to Ellie the tragedies of the gods that put them in the sky, the more she began to be repulsed by the starlight. It made her sick to her stomach, but Ellie loved them. Ellie loved the sky, the stars, and what lay beyond. So, Piper told herself she would like them too. But for tonight, all she wanted to do was loathe them, and only for tonight she would. Why would she want to look for the light when she found comfort in being lost in the darkness?

꧁_꧂

The pounding in Piper's head was getting worse the more Ellie fiddled with her mouth and fingers. Ellie was trying to whistle, but it came out as whimpering shrieks that only added to Piper's pain. Piper sent her sister a glare, not trusting herself enough to be civil with words.

"What?" Ellie responded. "I'm learning how to whistle."

Joel peeked over his shoulder at Ellie. "You don't know how to whistle?"

Ellie huffed and let her hands fall at her side. "Does it sound like I know how to whistle?"

"No," Joel replied, shaking his head.

After a few more failed attempts, Ellie sighed. "Seriously, though, how the fսck do you do that?"

"Talent," Joel shrugged.

Rolling her eyes, Ellie replied, "Whatever. You should teach me how to hunt."

"Huh," was all Joel could say in response.

"Huh," Ellie repeated in a deep voice, mocking Joel. "Like, she's a girl. She can't handle it."

Joel stopped in his tracks and turned around. "You can handle the shootin'. Not so sure about the dressin'," he sighed.

Ellie's brows furrowed. "What's the dressin'?"

"Isn't that the part where you take the guts out," Piper added.

"Oh, yeah," Ellie's eyes widened. "Why do they call it dressing? It's like, you should call it undressing 'cause it is. It's like… undressing from the inside. Still interested, though."

Soon, it became too loud for any of them to hear what Ellie had been saying. Tons and tons of water rushed out of a dam and crashed on the rocks below. The water flashed shades of green and yellow as the sun darted from behind the clouds. The three of them all stopped to wonder in the presence of the water. The sound was deafening, and any thoughts they had in their heads were drowned out.

"Dam," Ellie enunciated. She placed her hand on her hips and flashed a smug grin to Joel and Piper.

"You're no Will Livingston," Piper chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah, but who is?" Ellie playfully shrugged before turning to Joel. "So that made electricity?" She asked him.

"Yeah," Joel nodded. He caught sight of another question brewing in her eyes. "Don't ask me. I don't have a clue."

"You know, you could've just made something up," Ellie noted. "I would've believed you," she said as they turned away from the dam.

Piper chuckled. "True," she pointed out. "Like that time I told you how the baby got into the lady's stomach."

Ellie gasped. "That was a lie?"

"And you still believed it?" Piper snickered, "Thought they covered that in the QZ at some point." She playfully shoved Ellie's shoulder, almost knocking her into the snow.

"Hey!" Ellie yelled, regaining balance to return the favor to Piper. Piper gasped as she hit the freezing cold snow.

Piper hastily stood up, brushing off the pale snow from her clothes and grumbling to herself about the cold and hygiene.

"Pshh," Ellie chuckled, sending her sister a teasing look. Following her sister's rising frame, Ellie caught sight of the vast blue water. Her eyes bulged as she stumbled forward for a better look. "Look at that river. It's crazy blue!" She pointed as Joel and Piper huddled around her.

Piper glanced around. Nervousness escaped her eyes and seeped into her voice. "Hey, Joel… what if this is the River of Death?"

Joel hurriedly yanked out the map and flipped it around. His feet turned in circles as his mind desperately confirmed his fears.

A sharp chorus of neighs and pounding footsteps appeared over the hill. Riders, horses, and dogs charged towards them one by one.

"Joel!" Piper cried out, stepping back towards the water and away from the approaching mass.

"Get behind me," Joel instructed the girls. Ellie and Piper wasted no time hiding behind Joel's large figure. When the horses arrived, the girl's knuckles had turned white. "We ain't lookin' for any trouble. We're just passin' through," Joel announced to the riders.

The rider in front motioned with his gun. "Drop the gun," he told Joel, who quickly complied. Then the man pointed to Piper and Ellie. "You two… take five steps back."

Piper gulped as she fought to hold back the growing fear. Ellie wasn't doing much better, her fear echoing in her shaking eyes.

"How 'bout we just talk this through?" Joel asked, raising his hands.

"How 'bout you shut the fսck up?" One of the other riders bellowed.

"Okay, easy," Joel said before looking back at the girls. The brief glances he gave them eased some of the building anxiety. Something about Joel's dark eyes helped Piper feel safe. Whether she liked it or not, Piper trusted Joel. "You'll be okay," Joel comforted.

As the girls stepped back, the rider in front asked, "You been near Infected?"

"There's no Infected out here," Joel responded.

"The hell there ain't," Another one grumbled.

Suddenly, the front man hopped down from his horse and whistled. It was loud and clear before everything went silent. Instantly, the sounds of a vicious barking ripped through the air.

"Last chance for a bullet," the man warned. "If you've been infected, he will smell it, and he will rip you up."

At that moment, as the deadly sharp teeth of the dog shimmered in the sun, Ellie wished she was holding Piper's hand. She was scared. She had been bit, and so had Piper. They were immune, but if the dog smelt anything, they'd be dead. She’d be dead before she could save anyone. She'd-

"Like I said… we'll just move on," Joel stated as the dog approached him. The animal sniffed before placing its paws gently on his torso. Joel was clean.

"Now her," the man said, pointing to Ellie. Joel's ears felt on fire as he listened to each sniffle and huff of the dog. His heart clenched and he soon found it hard to breathe. Just as fast as he was cleared, so was Ellie. The sound of her giggles as the dog playfully licked her face, eased some of the tension in Joel's body. However, they weren't clear yet.

"Last one," the rider said, pulling the dog away from Ellie.

Joel dared, looking behind at Piper. Her face showed no uncertainty as the dog approached growling. Despite her fearless appearance, Joel saw the terror in her eyes. It was the same look she had that night in the motel. The same look she bore when she asked him to kill her and make that horrifying promise to her. Now, he wished he hadn't looked, but even so, Joel couldn't look away. Not until both of his girls were alright.

The dog had begun its search. Piper's hands were wet and warm as her nails cut through the feeble gloves and into her skin. Her eyes clenched shut from the pain. Each sniffle was a reminder that her own breath could be her last. Ellie was cleared, and so should Piper. No matter how much she kept telling herself that, Piper knew she was different. The way those Infected ignored her as if she was one of them. Piper prepared for the worst but prayed for the best. Prayed that maybe Joel could save her if the dog went for her throat. Maybe they could hold off this huge group. Maybe-

A comforting weight was placed on her chest, and her cheeks burned from the dog's wet kisses. Light flooded her view, and Piper looked down and smiled. She was safe.

The man whistled, and the dog propelled itself off Piper. "You just bought yourself 10 more seconds. What are you doin' out here?" The man interrogated.

Joel stepped back near the girls and answered. "I'm just lookin' for my brother. That's all, nothing' more."

A voice from the back shot over the crowd. Pulling her horse forward, a woman approached Joel and the girls. "What's your name?"

"Joel," he replied.

The woman's eyes widened. She began telling some of the riders to grab horses for the three of them.

"You're gonna wanna come with us," she said. "I'm Maria, by the way."

The three of them shared confused looks as they were placed on horses. Piper sat behind Ellie on a large tan stead. The horse neighed as Ellie curiously reached forward to pet its mane. Joel was placed on a dark brown horse. Once they were settled, the group moved forward and the horses trotted along carrying them away to wherever Marlene was taking them.

꧁_꧂

Maria spoke little of their destination, but even with the little she said, she convinced Joel. If Joel was convinced, so were the girls. It wasn't until they saw the looming metallic and wooden walls that they knew they were entering a settlement. The sight of the walls did little to put Piper at ease. She knew once she entered their confines that it'd be hard to leave. She just hoped Joel knew how to get them out if needed.

The gates to the community opened with a screech, and the horses carried them deeper into the town. With each prance, the more uneasy Ellie and Piper felt. People walked along the roadside chatting and laughing. Kids played in a playground, teasing each other before finding a snowball headed towards their faces. Groups all around worked together, all with determined smiles on their faces. Everything was normal until the group pranced further down the road. Their smiles would falter and would be replaced with curious and confused stares.

The girls didn't know what they hated more, the cheerful and carefree smiles or the curious stares. All the eyes on them made Ellie and Piper feel as if they were monkeys in a zoo. Made to be observed and ogled at. Piper felt particularly on edge when a group of young children stopped and whispered while pointing at her and Ellie. After sending them a curt middle finger, the children gasped or fled in fear. An emotion that made Piper and Ellie feel a bit more at ease.

Soon, the horse slowed and came to a halt. Piper peered over Ellie's shoulder and saw Maria motion to Joel and point to a group of people fixing up a building. Joel's eyes squinted before expanding with an expression that Piper had never seen from him before. At first, she thought it was relief or hope, but she knew her assumptions were wrong; the second, Joel jumped off his horse and called his brother's name. It was love.

Ellie and Piper watched as Joel ran toward Tommy and enveloped him in a hug. His face beaming, a laugh of joy and disbelief escaped his lips. There was a pain in her chest at the sight of Joel and his brother. She felt sick as Joel became someone she didn't recognize. Turning her gaze away, she glanced at Ellie, whose head hung low, hiding her eyes, which felt the very same pain.

"It's okay," Piper whispered in her sister's ear. It was a lifeless comfort. Nothing Piper could say would ever ease the ache in both of their hearts. They were cargo. Tommy was family. The girls had to keep reminding themselves of that, even if their hearts were dreaming for something else.

It didn't take long for the joyous reunion to end. Everyone was ushered inside, and a hot meal was placed down in front of them. The ache in the girl's heart seemed to be never-ending, but the sight and scent of a decent meal helped distract from the hurt.

Before the steam from the plate could dissipate, the girl's plates had been practically cleared.

Maria sat beside Tommy, who watched in horror as Joel and the girls scarfed down their food. "There's more if you need it," Maria mentioned.

Joel looked up from his plate and noticed the hurried manner in which they had been eating. Slowly swallowing his food, he sat up straighter and adjusted how he held his fork. Clearing his throat, he began, "Thank you, ma'am. It's been a while since we've had a proper meal."

"Actually," Ellie said as she chewed another bite, "I don't think I've ever had a proper meal. This is fսckin' amazing."

Simultaneously, Piper took a bite and moaned, "Fuuck, that’s good."

Joel felt his cheeks grow red. "Sorry. Ellie, Piper…," the girls snapped their heads in his direction, cheeks stuffed with food. "…let's mind our manners."

Piper gulped. "Sorry," she quietly apologized.

Ellie, on the other hand, ignored Joel's words until Piper kicked her shin. Ellie sent her sister a glare when she noticed another figure looking at them from afar. It was a girl with dark hair and tan skin. She peeked around the corner and caught sight of Ellie's stare.

"What?!" Ellie yelled, scaring the girl away.

"What's wrong with you?" Joel hissed.

"What about her manners?" Ellie quipped back.

Maria calmly placed a hand on the table. "She was just curious. Kids around here don't usually look or talk like you."

"Right… well, maybe Piper and I’ll teach them," Ellie muttered before taking another bite.

Joel sighed and gave Maria and Tommy an apologetic look.

"I want my gun back," Piper said, looking up at Tommy and Maria.

"Kids here also aren't armed," Maria noted.

Piper scoffed. "But what if-"

"Then the adults step in," Maria responded. "Kids deserve to be kids."

Maria's comment made Piper scoff once again. She placed down her fork and stared at the woman. "So what?" Piper spat, "You think I'm just gonna let some fucker-"

"Piper," Joel reprimanded, sending her a glare that was returned by the rolling of her eyes.

Tommy sat up in his chair. His eyes darted between Joel and Piper. "You know what? Uh…" Tommy muttered. "I think maybe y'all got a little off on the wrong foot."

Piper snickered and pointed at Maria. "She was gonna have her guys kill us."

"Well, we gotta be real careful about who we let in this place," Tommy explained. "But it's all bark. We're just tryna scare off those who might wanna try us."

"Well, you got a couple of 90-year-olds shitting themselves out there," Ellie added.

"Ellie," Joel cautioned.

"What?" Ellie hissed.

"They say that you leave dead bodies around," Piper said, staring down at Maria.

"Those are the people who tried us," Maria replied, leaning forward.

Tommy placed a hand on Maria's shoulder. "A bad reputation doesn't mean you're bad," he noted.

"Not always, at least," Maria said.

"Ma'am…," Joel began. "We're grateful for your hospitality and all. But it'd be nice to have a moment here, maybe just for family."

Tommy's eyes shifted to Maria and then his brother. "Well, um… Maria is family, actually,' Tommy corrected.

Ellie was the first to get Tommy's meaning. "Oh, shit! Congrats," she congratulated.

"Congrats," Piper begrudgingly muttered. Her glare at Maria softened. She looked to her right and noticed Joel's silence. "Joel, say congrats," Piper encouraged.

"Congrats," Joel mumbled, and a silence followed.

Feeling uneasy with how his brother was looking at him, Tommy stood up from his seat. "How 'bout a tour?"

꧁_꧂

The chilly winter air pinkened their cheeks and the tips of their ears as they emerged from the dining hall. Maria took the lead with Tommy in the back as they began the tour of the settlement.

"We settled here about seven years ago," Maria began. "Just a handful of us back then."

The girls looked around, acknowledging the street bordered with buildings of shapes and colors. Piper sniffled as the cold reached her nose. The sniffle was cut short in her throat, and it didn't take long for her lungs to heave. Stopping in her tracks, Piper keeled over and coughed.

The whole group stopped to look at her. She hated having their eyes glued to her. After all, it was just a simple cough. "Are you good? You look sick," Joel stated.

Forcing the cough away, Piper replied, "I’m not–I’m fine. I don’t get sick." She stood straight and stared at the group as if the look in her eye could wash away any doubt they had in her impeccable health.

Maria stepped forward and, in a gentle voice, spoke. "The doctor’s is just down the street, I can take y’all there to-"

"I said I’m fucking fine!" Piper spat.

"Piper," Joel hissed.

"What?" Piper said.

Taking a good look at her, Joel saw the signs: the pink nose, the recent headaches, the coughing. So, for the first time since Tommy made his announcement, Joel looked at Maria. "If you could show us to the doctor, that’d be great."

"Joel!" Piper whined, the sound of betrayal deeply ingrained in her voice.

"Pipes, come on," Ellie chimed in, placing a hand on her sister's shoulder. "You've been coughing and grabbing your head for days now."

Piper took one swing and swatted Ellie's hand away. "Ellie, I swear to fuck–"

"I’ll take you after the tour," Maria loudly announced, silencing the rising argument. Turning over her shoulder, she picked the tour back up as if nothing ever happened. "That section was already a gated community, so we built the rest of the wall out from there. Stopped most of the raiding parties, but we still found pockets of them."

"And you said Infected?" Joel asked.

Tommy jogged up close to his brother and, leaning in, explained, "Yeah, but usually smaller colonies wandered off from the cities. All this open country out here… it's a turkey shoot. I still got my 700, but I found a variable power scope. Sub-MOA." With a beam on his face, he continued. "Can headshot those fuckers from a half mile out."

Ellie's ears perked at the mention of Tommy's shooting. She glanced over at Joel and then back at Tommy, who was a lot more likable than the other. She thought to herself that maybe if Joel wasn't willing to teach her, then maybe Tommy might. "Can you teach me how?" She found herself wishfully asking.

Joel peered over his shoulder and glared. "No, he can't," he said, turning to Maria to propose another question: "How do you keep this place quiet?"

"Carefully," Maria said, "Being in the middle of nowhere helps. Not advertising what we have, staying off the radio. House of worship, multifaith. School. Laundry. Old bank works as the jail, not that we've needed it."

"And you draw power from the dam?" Joel questioned.

"Got that workin' a couple years ago," Tommy mentioned. "After that, sewage, plumbing, water heaters… lights."

The girls shared a moment of awe, even if they did not display it on their faces. "This place actually fսckin' works," Ellie mumbled to herself.

Piper leaned close to her sister and whispered, "I know, right? Hey, look," Piper patted Ellie's shoulder and pointed to a herd of sheep. Their white, fluffy fur made them look like the clouds above. The girls strayed from the group and hopped onto the fence. "Hey Joel, check it out!" Piper smirked,, earning a chuckle from Ellie and an eye roll from Joel.

"So are you, like, in charge?" Ellie asked after jumping off the fence and returning to the tour group.

"No one person's in charge," Maria explained. "I'm on the council. Democratically elected, serving 300 people, including children. Everyone pitches in. We rotate patrols, food prep, repairs, hunting, and harvesting. Everything you see in our town, including greenhouses and livestock, is shared. Collective ownership."

"So, uh, communism," Joel scoffed.

Tommy shook his head. "Nah. Nah, it ain't like that."

Maria chuckled and looked at her husband. "It is that. Literally." Tommy's face dropped as contemplation and confusion flooded his face. "This is a commune. We're communists."

Ellie and Piper shrugged, not sure what 'communism' was, and instead focused their attention on the stables nearby. In one of the stalls, a tiny head popped out causing Ellie to shriek and wipe away her detached expression. "No way!"

Maria smiled upon seeing the cause of Ellie's excitement. "That's our newest one. Couple of months old. You wanna pet her?" Maria motioned for Ellie to get closer.

Ellie didn't waste any time petting the small horse. "What's her name?" She softly asked.

"Shimmer," Maria replied.

"Shimmer," Ellie cooed. "You're so beautiful."

Upon noticing Piper's distance, Maria gently smiled at the girl. "You can pet her too," she said.

Piper shook her head and coughed. "No thanks," she said, trying to cover up the tension in her lungs.

Ellie reluctantly turned away from Shimmer and looked back at her sister. "You know, I’m starting to think you are sick."

"Fucking hell, Ellie," Piper growled. "You know I don’t get sick."

"Everyone gets sick," Maria assured Piper before turning to Tommy. "Well, I'm sure they'd like a shower and some new clothes. We can put them in the empty house across the street from us."

Tommy nodded and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Yeah. It's a decent place. Pretty much untouched since '03, but it's got the heat goin' in it. Could do worse."

"Oh," Ellie noted, "trust me, we have been."

"We've been doin' fine," Joel reiterated.

"Well," Maria said. I'll take Ellie over there and Piper to the doctor if you two want to catch up."

Piper's eyes widened, and she raised her shoulders in defense. "I’m not goi–"

"You’re going," Joel decided. Piper opened her mouth to refute but was shot down by the look in Joel's dark eyes.

"Yeah," Tommy nodded. "Okay."

"Joel," Ellie muttered, glancing over to Joel.

"You'll be fine," he reassured. "You both will be fine." Piper rolled her eyes and huffed as Joel and Tommy walked away, already beginning to talk amongst themselves.

"Shall we?" Maria asked.

"Uh, yeah," Ellie replied before looking at her sister.

"Fine," Piper grumbled.

Maria began to walk before peering over her shoulder at the girls. "I’ll take you to the Doctor first. It’s on the way," Maria said. "Doctor Watson is a nice man. Knows what he’s doing. You’re in good hands."

"I’m not–" Piper complained.

"-Sick," Maria finished. "I know. But let’s hear it from someone who knows."

꧁_꧂

Ellie had to shove Piper through the doctor's office doors. Maria couldn't help but chuckle to herself at the sight in front of her. While the two girls struggled, she easily stepped inside and greeted the young man sitting behind the desk.

"Hello, Charlie," she smiled. A head of dark curly hair looked up at the three of them. His black eyes darted between Maria and Piper, who was fighting off Ellie's attempts at manhandling her.

"Maria, to what do I owe the pleasure," Charlie asked once the front door loudly slammed shut.

"I’ve got a friend here who needs to see Doctor Watson," Maria spoke before pointing to Piper.

"I see," Charlie nodded. "We’ll take good care of her."

"I know you will," Maria agreed before turning to Piper. "Piper, I’ll be back in a while. I’m just taking Ellie to the house."

Piper's eyes widened, and she nervously looked over to her sister. "But–"

"Just to check," Maria reminded.

"Stop being such a baby, Pipes," Ellie chimed in.

"Fuck you," Piper whined in response as Ellie and Maria walked out the doors just as quickly as they had come in. With a huff, Piper spotted an empty seat and sat down, fiddling with her hands in an attempt to ignore the stares from the boy.

"Haven’t seen your face before," Charlie said as he peeked his head over the desk.

"Fuck off," Piper hissed.

"Yikes. She bites," chuckled Charlie. Deciding that his current viewpoint wasn't satisfactory, he stood up, leaned against the desk, and smiled cheerfully at Piper.

She hated that smile. She hated his bouncy, curly head of hair and his soft, dark eyes. They reminded her of Joel's. The very eyes she recently found herself finding comfort. "And who the fuck are you?" She questioned, not really wanting to hear the answer.

"Charleston Brekker." He took out his hand for her to shake. Piper glared at his hand as if it had created the biggest offense in the history of the world. Awkwardly, Charlie withdrew his hand and placed it in his pants pocket. "But I go by Charlie. I’m the doc’s intern of sorts. He’s showing me the ropes and whatnot before he kicks the can."

"That’s a fucking mouthful," Piper mumbled. "And Brekker? More like a breaker."

Charlie nervously chuckled. "Haha, very funny. What’s your name?"

Piper scoffed, "As if I’d tell you."

Shrugging his shoulders, Charlie sighed. "Alright, Piper, thought I’d at least give you the chance to tell me yourself." He wanted to laugh at the look of disbelief on her face. "I heard Maria say it,' he explained.

"Fuck you."

Charlie glanced down at the ground fighting the urge to sigh again. To him, trying to make conversation with Piper was like trying to pet a wolf. "The Doctor is seeing someone else right now, should be out soon," he said.

"Whatever."

So far, Charlie has tried two potential conversation openers. Piper had shot down both of them. Luckily, Charlie had a plethora of backup plans. "Let me guess, you’re 8," Charlie guessed.

"Let me guess," Piper leered, "you don’t know how to shut your mouth. And I’m 17."

"We’re the same age," Charlie added. "And for the record, I don’t."

"I can tell." Piper took a good look at him. He had strong features adorning his face. Each sculpted part of his face framed his eyes. She hated those eyes. Why were they so kind and clear, free from the clouds and dirt that plagued hers? However, what she hated most was his smile. It reached the apples of his cheeks that turned a light pink each time he flashed her that smile. God, it was gross. Disgusting. She hat- Piper shook her head. She was thinking too much about his stupid face and stupid smile.

"So…have you–" Charlie began again before the sound of the backdoor creaked open.

"Just continue following my orders and you’ll be right as rain in no time," a man dressed in a white coat instructed an elderly woman. The two walked down the hallway and to the doors that Piper so desperately wanted to flee out of. "Charlie, who do we have here?" The man asked once the woman had vacated the area.

"Piper," Charlie said, earning a sharp glare from the girl. "She came in with Maria. Says she isn’t sick."

Doctor Watson nodded. His speckled gray hair bobbed up and down, and the wrinkles on his face creased as he turned to look at her. "I see. Piper, if you’ll come with me."

Taking one look at the doctor, Piper shook her head. "No," she stated.

Doctor Watson's eyes softened at her guarded demeanor. "I’m just going to ensure you’re healthy as you say you are."

Piper's eyes flickered to the backroom. In a quiet voice, she asked, "Do I have to go back there?"

Doctor Watson shook his head. "No, but it offers more privacy…I can leave the door open if that is what you prefer."

After a moment of contemplation, Piper agreed and begrudgingly walked to the backroom with the door open all the way.

꧁_꧂

Joel found himself at ease as he sank onto the barstool. His eyes watched as Tommy went behind the counter and pulled out some drinks for the two of them, pouring the liquid and dropping some ice cubes in the alcohol.

"Been a long time," Joel said. "Doesn't seem like you aged much."

"You, on the other hand," Tommy teased as he placed the drink before Joel. "Thanks for still giving a shit about me." Tommy's eyes expectantly watched as Joel raised the glass to his lips. Joel felt his taste buds light a fire with joy. "Workin' on raisin' some hogs, too," Tommy proudly said. "Once we get bacon, I mean, what's even left?"

"Pshoo," Joel laughed. "Christmas trees and bacon? Pretty decent setup."

"So, how's Tess?" Tommy inquired.

The cheerfulness in Joel's expression faltered. "She's fine. All right."

"Good then," Tommy nodded. "And the kids?"

Joel furrowed his brow until he realized Tommy was asking about his girls—the girls. "Oh, yeah," Joel explained, "They’re the daughters of some Firefly muckety-muck. I'm trying to find their family somewhere out here. I was headin' in this direction, so…"

Disbelief filled Tommy's face. "Really? Goodness of your heart?"

"There's a payment," Joel confessed. "So you know where they might be? These Fireflies?"

Tommy shrugged. "Well, they got a base down at the University of Eastern Colorado. It's, uh, a week's ride south. But…" Tommy noted. "It is severely fսckеd up between here and there. Infected… raiders. It's not exactly an easy trip."

"It'll be easy for us," Joel said, "seeing as how you can headshot Infected from half a mile away, which is a bunch of bullshit, by the way." He took another swig of his drink and sighed as the warm touch of the alcohol traveled down his throat and to the rest of his body.

"Yeah," Tommy quietly said. "I can't go."

"Oh, come on," Joel chuckled. "I made it across the country. The two of us can make it from here to Colorado." Tommy's expression hadn't changed. Joel sighed, "What, 'cause your wife won't let you?"

At the mention of Maria, Tommy's expression hardened. "Joel," Tommy warned.

"She the one who kept you off the radio?" Joel accused, and a flash of guilt grew on Tommy's face. "Is that why you stopped messaging me back?"

"After I ditched the Fireflies, Maria and her crew found me," Tommy explained. "They're good people. They didn't have to take me in, but they did. And all they ask is that I follow their rules."

"I'm your brother."

"Yeah, I'm aware," Tommy acknowledged. "They're very protective of this place, and for good fսckin' reason. I mean, folks find out we're up here…"

"No, I heard. Wrong people might show up," Joel retorted. "So, is that what I am? Am I the wrong people?"

"Joel…" Tommy sighed.

The drink in front of Joel had long been forgotten. Years of hurt bubbled up to the surface, too much for the alcohol to soak up. "Those things I did, Tommy," Joel defended, "those things that you judge me for, I did those things to keep us alive."

"We did those things. And they weren't "things," Tommy argued. "We murdered people. And I don't judge you for it. We survived the only way we knew how. But there were other ways. We just weren't any good at 'em."

"If you knew the shit that I've been through, Tommy." Joel's voice began to falter. "Tryin' to find you these last few months…"

"I'm gonna be a father," Tommy blurted, ending Joel's train of thought. "Maria's a few months along now. So I just gotta be more careful." With Joel's silence, Tommy continued. "To be honest, I'm scared to death. But I don't know. Uh… I feel like I'd be a good dad."

The drink in front of him was intoxicating now, so Joel picked it up and drank the rest. "Guess we'll find out."

"I guess we'll find out?" Tommy scoffed. "That's all you got?"

Joel shrugged, "What else am I supposed to say?"

Anger boiled up to the surface at Joel's response. "Just because life stopped for you…," Tommy said, "doesn't mean it has to stop for me."

Joel's teeth ground against each other, and his jaw began to hurt. "We'll grab some supplies and be outta your hair in the mornin'," Joel mumbled before hastily finding his way out of the bar.

꧁_꧂

Piper was indeed sick. She had been battling a cough and headache for days, yet the news stunned her. Her head tuned out the words of Doctor Watson as the realization hit her. She was sick. The doctor mentioned something about the common cold, but that did not matter. Piper was sick. For as long as she could remember she had never gotten sick. She couldn't. Being sick wasn't a choice for Piper, especially not after FEDRA put a gun in her hand. Yet here she was, sitting in Doctor Watson's office, sick.

"…luckily I have the right medication to help you feel better in no time," Doctor Watson continued and handed Piper a bottle of some pills. "You’ll take three of these each day. Take them with meals. And continue to take them until your cough is gone. And stay out of the cold. Any questions?" Piper shook her head, not realizing he was asking her a question. "Good. Another thing is to keep those hands bandaged and clean. You don't want an infection…"

Glancing down at her hands, she gently trailed her fingers over the white bandages. Doctor Watson had noticed the blood and scabs from where her nails had dug into her palms.

Finally, her ears had caught up with the doctor's words. "Wait, actually…"

Doctor Watson gave her his best bedside smile. "Yes?"

"Can I ask something that’s not related to my cough?" Piper wondered.

"Of course," the doctor replied.

"Hypothetically," Piper began, "if someone were immune to the fungus. You know, the one that turns you into an infe–"

The Doctor's brows raised but allowed her to continue. "Infected. Yes, I do," he finished.

Piper frowned, unsure of how to phrase her next words. Finding a satisfactory sequence of words, she asked, "How would someone like you go about making the cure?"

Doctor Watson sighed and rested his head in his wrinkled hand. His forehead creased as his thoughts came to him. "Well, it’s risky," he said after some time. "The fungus infects the brain, and if someone were immune, it would be something in the brain or the central nervous system if you'd rather I'd get technical."

Piper grimaced. "So, not their blood?"

"No," Doctor Watson shook his head. "To even attempt a cure, that person’s brain would have to be removed so one could determine the cause of immunity. Even so, attempting to replicate it in others is nearly impossible with the state of medical technology now."

"Are you saying…they would die, The immune person?" Piper's voice grew quiet as her clarifying question floated around.

"Yes," Doctor Watson answered.

"Oh," Piper's face fell. With the doctor's answer, she no longer cared for her sickness. Instead, she thought of Ellie. She wondered if Ellie knew, which she most likely didn't. Next, she wondered if Marlene knew and knowingly misled the girls. Did Joel and Tess know? Were she and Ellie just being led to their deaths, all in the hope of an impossible cure? Piper's uncertainty was quickly replaced with a determination to tell Ellie. She had to stop her sister, even if it meant breaking her. She had to tell Ellie. She had to keep Ellie alive. She noticed she'd been quiet for too long. "Thanks for the–yeah," Piper blurted.

"No problem." Doctor Watson stood up and walked to the door, motioning for Piper to follow. "Charlie?" He called out.

Charlie popped up in the doorway. His head of frustratingly perfect curls sparkled with golden highlights from the artificial lights. "Yeah?" He said before sending Piper a grin.

"Charlie will show you out," Doctor Watson told Piper. "Take care, Piper."

"Yeah," Piper muttered before following Charlie out into the lobby. She looked around for Ellie's familiar face and Maria's figure. She frowned. They were nowhere to be seen. "Where’s Maria?" She asked Charlie.

"So…Maria’s not here," Charlie said. "Thought I’d show you to her house." He smiled at her and nervously ran his hand through his hair.

Piper watched his hands as they brushed through his curls. Shaking herself out of her insane trance, she declined, "No thanks."

"It’s not far," Charlie explained, "besides, I’d hate it if you got lost."

"I don’t get lost," Piper mentioned, standing up straighter as she marched to the door.

"Just like you don’t get sick?" Charlie chuckled.

With her hand frozen on the door handle, Piper slowly turned around and caught sight of Charlie's smug smile. "Fuck you," Piper growled before opening the door.

"Thanks," Charlie said as he brushed by Piper, strolling out the door. "Come on, Piper."

She was sure her eyes had rolled into the back of her head and were now permanently stuck. "Jesus Christ," she mumbled.

꧁_꧂

It was hard to see anything in the steam-filled bathroom. The place had a plethora of piping hot water, and Ellie decided she'd take full advantage of that, unaware that she'd left barely any for Piper and Joel. The foggy air fled from the bathroom once Ellie had creaked open the door. If she hadn't just taken the longest and hottest shower known to mankind, one might think there had been a fire.

Creeping over to the pink and green blanketed bed, Ellie noticed the new addition of clean clothes and a plastic, gel-like thingy. Her brows creased as she picked up the strange object and quickly noticed a sheet of paper containing instructions. She briefly read the sheet and pulled her lips tight. "Oh! Gross," she mumbled. Placing it down, she picked up the clothes and began to change.

Each item of clothing was free from dirt, grime, bugs, and anything else that the outdoors could taint with. She felt clean and new. She was sure she'd never felt it in her life. All the clothes she'd worn in the QZ were old or covered in dust from the years of sitting once modern civilization had been forgotten. She smiled, felt the soft cloth along her skin, and thought of how much Piper was going to enjoy a hot shower and new clothes. It'd be a dream come true for her older sister's obsession with hygiene.

After changing, Ellie recalled Maria's words and went down the stairs, out the door, and across the street to Tommy and Maria's residence. Raising her fist to knock quietly, Ellie stepped inside the home.

"Hello? Maria?" She called out, looking around for the woman. Her feet took her further into the home. It was nice and…homely, Ellie guessed. She wasn't sure what a home would look like, but Maria and Tommy's setup seemed close enough. There were maintained couches, lamps, tables, and decorations on the mantel. Upon further glance, Ellie noticed a board with names. It read "Kevin and Sarah."

"Oh, good," Maria's voice said from behind Ellie. Turning around, Ellie peered down at Maria's hand. In it was an ugly-ass purple coat and another that was a blinding bright orange. Both colors were atrocious to look at, but Ellie quickly determined the orange was much easier on the eyes. The shade of the purple coat was that of a dark bruise. It made Ellie feel sick just looking at it.

"I just traded for this. Go ahead, try it on," Maria encouraged, handing the purple coat to Ellie.

"It's, uh," Ellie said, trying to hide her grimace. "…super fսckin' purple."

"Eggplant," Maria corrected. Ellie's eyes flashed with confusion at the mention of an eggplant. Whatever it was, it sounded just as gross as the shade of purple. "It fits?" Maria asked.

"Yeah," Ellie shrugged, feeling much warmer than she'd ever been in her old coat.

"Shoes aren't too big?"

Wiggling her toes, Ellie shook her head. "Uh, no. Where's my other stuff?"

"Rag pile," Maria said. "Did you get the thing I left you?"

"Yeah. Weirdest gift ever," Ellie muttered, thinking about the thingy still on the bed.

"But useful," Maria chuckled. She stepped close to Ellie and pointed to her hair. "Who's been cutting your hair?"

"Uh, world-class salons," Ellie sarcastically replied. Maria smiled. "Piper," Ellie confessed. "Piper's always the one who cuts it."

Maria nodded. "Let me get my scissors."

"Oh," Ellie exclaimed. "Whoa, no. I'm…"

"Trim," Maria assured. "That's all. Just the ends, I promise."

Glancing down at her wet hair, Ellie sighed. It would be nice to cut it a bit shorter. Nodding her head, she followed Maria into the dining room and sat down in the chair Maria had presented her.

Expertly weaving her finger through Ellie's hair, Maria began to brush, measure, and cut it. Ellie's scalp tingled as Maria massaged her head, and she couldn't help but close her eyes in contentment. Maybe Piper could learn some tips from Maria.

"Maria?" An unfamiliar voice echoed throughout the home.

Maria stopped brushing through Ellie's hair and peered around. "Charlie!" She called out as the boy from the doctor's office, and Piper stepped into the dining hall.

"You forgot me," Piper muttered.

"Sorry," Maria apologized. I was busy trading for some new clothes for you and your sister." She stepped away from Ellie, retrieved the clothes and orange coat from the table, and handed them over to Piper. "Here. Try this on," she said before turning to Charlie. Thanks again, Charlie."

"No problem, Ma’am," Charlie beamed, and Piper swore, then stood a few inches taller.

"So, are you gonna try them on?" Maria expectantly said.

Piper glanced down at the clothes and coat. "They’ll fit," she said.

Maria looked disbelieving but chose not to say anything. "Right," she nodded. "The house you’re staying in is right across from mine. Find a room, take a shower and come on back over here. I’ll cut your hair too."

"I’ll cut it myself," Piper grumbled.

Maria sighed. "Well, you’ll need scissors." She walked over to the kitchen and opened a drawer, pulling out another pair of scissors. She carefully placed them in Piper's hand.

"Thanks," Piper mumbled before tucking them under her arm with the rest of her clothes.

"I can show you to the house," Charlie proposed.

Piper opened her mouth to refuse, but Maria beat her to it. "Doctor Watson will need you back at the office."

Charlie closed his mouth and bid his goodbye. Piper watched him go, torn between missing his annoying presence and being grateful for Maria's words. Soon, Maria got back to grooming Ellie's hair. Meanwhile, the urge for a shower grew greater than Doctor Watson's answers. So, Piper found herself sneaking over to the house across the street. There was also a later time she could tell Ellie. A better time away from outside listening ears.

꧁_꧂ "So, this was, like, your job back then or something?" Ellie wondered as Maria snipped away at her hair. It must have been with how deftly Maria navigated Ellie's head of hair.

"No," Maria said. "I was an Assistant District Attorney out of Omaha, Nebraska. I put bad guys in jail."

"Oh… Cool," Ellie replied. "I guess."

"I always liked doing hair, though," Maria continued. "Maybe it was a mom thing. You were looking at the little memorial Tommy made?"

"Uh, yeah." Ellie peeked over at Maria, who gently directed her head back down. "I'm-I'm sorry about your kids."

"It's okay. And kid," Maria corrected. "Just Kevin. Sarah was Joel's daughter." Maria felt Ellie's shoulders stiffen. "Oh, maybe I shouldn't have said anything."

"No," Ellie shook her head. "It's okay. I guess that explains him a little."

Satisfied with the trim she had given Ellie, Maria set the scissors down and leaned against the table across from Ellie. "Look, I'm not gonna ask you what you're doing with him."

"Good," Ellie replied. Her voice grew stiff.

"But there are clearly things you don't know about Joel," Maria noted.

"Oh," Ellie said, connecting the dots Maria had left for her. "…like how he used to kill people? I know about that."

"So then you understand my concern."

Ellie shook her head. "He doesn't do that anymore."

"He stopped killing people?" Maria raised her brow, unconvinced.

"Innocent ones," Ellie corrected. "And Tommy did it, too. Are you worried about him?"

"Tommy was following Joel," Maria explained. "The way you and your sister are now."

"Well," Ellie scoffed, "maybe Piper and I are smarter than Tommy. No offense."

"You are definitely smart. Would've made a hell of a lawyer," Maria chuckled. "There's a whole lot you're not telling me. Good. Therein lies the point. Be careful who you put your faith in. The only people who can betray us… are the ones we trust. You understand?"

"Mm-hmm," Ellie nodded.

"Now, come on." Maria stood up. "Grab your super fսckin' eggplant coat."

Ellie shrugged on the coat. "Where are we going?"

"The movies," Maria replied before strolling out the front door, expecting Ellie to follow.

꧁_꧂

Piper noted that the house had just enough bedrooms for Ellie and her and too many bathrooms. There were four, one in each of the bedrooms and another, which she assumed was the communal one.

She'd found a bedroom with ease. Ellie had already staked her claim in one of the upstairs rooms by sprawling her bag on the floor next to the bed. One of the others contained a large bed, much too big for Piper to find any comfort in. She left that one to Joel and instead took up the bedroom on the ground floor.

The walls were painted light blue, and the sheets had various small flower designs adorning them. The bed was small, something she was happy about. She preferred small beds. She wasn't sure why, but she did. The less space things took up, the better.

After finding her room, she entered the bathroom and started up her shower. The water was warm against the cooler air of the bathroom. It did not take long for steam to collect in the air. Stepping underneath the water, Piper watched as months of dirt washed down the drain. At first, the water turned a shade of dark brown, and for a moment, Piper thought it stained the white porcelain of the tub. After a few minutes, the water turned clear again, and Piper began to scrub.

She scrubbed her hair, letting strands trickle down the drain. Her hands, all soaped up, scrubbed her skin until it grew raw and pink. Next were her nail beds, which Piper had determined were the cleanest part of her due to the care Doctor Watson had shown her. Trailing her hands over the soggy bandages, she was glad the Doctor had given her extra. She'd have to rebandage them once her shower was over.

Once she was satisfied with her cleanliness, Piper switched off the water and stepped out. After drying and rebandaging her hand, she wiped away the condensation on the mirror. She didn't spend much time admiring her clean figure and instead looked at her hair. Even washed, it seemed all tangled up. Maybe Maria was right. She really did need a haircut. Carefully, she brushed her fingers through her hair, releasing most of the knots.

Picking up the scissors, Piper stared at her reflection. Her hair was thick and long. Perfect for keeping the nipping cold at bay. She knew she'd have to brave the cold once again and a haircut would not do her any good. Confirming her decision, Piper placed down the scissors and replaced them with the pills Doctor Watson had given her. She swallowed, glanced at her reflection, and left the bathroom.

The new clothes and coat trapped the warmth of the shower against Piper's skin. In the pockets of the coat she found a new hat, gloves, and cup thingy. She frowned as she squished it until recognition filled her face. Placing the period cup in her bag, Piper made her way out of the house and to Maria's. Except Maria wasn't there and neither was Ellie.

"Forgotten again," Piper mumbled to herself. Then she noticed a note on the dining room table.

"We are at the movies. Just take a left and the end of the road and then go straight - Maria"

"Movies," Piper repeated as she crumpled up the note. "Of course, they have movies."

꧁_꧂

The bell above the door chimed, and a burst of cold air filled the room. Joel groaned as the tool in his hand slipped and fell to the floor. His hands were shaking too much to fix his leather boots, which were falling apart at the seams. Not bothering to look up at the guest, Joel placed his head in his hands.

"The guys said I might find you here," Tommy announced before plopping new boots on the table in front of Joel. "Figured I'd save you the trouble."

Joel glanced up at the boots and then at his brother.

"I shouldn't have said what I said," Tommy apologized.

"I don't even believe it," Joel muttered.

"I know you're happy for me. It just…," Tommy trailed off, trying to find the right words. "It's complicated for you… and I'm sorry."

Joel sighed and placed on the new pair of boots. They fit like a glove. "So you're gonna let me off the hook, or what?" Tommy shook his head and leaned against a nearby table. "This ride to the University, is it a suicide mission?" Joel pondered.

"No," Tommy replied. "It's dangerous, but it's nothin' you can't handle. Just prepare and do what you do."

"You've had people go that way and come back?" Joel asked, taking in Tommy's advice.

"All of 'em," Tommy answered. He watched as his brother grew quiet. "What is this?" Tommy asked.

Joel was eerily quiet before answering. "They're immune," he confessed.

"What?" Tommy's brows creased in confusion.

"Ellie and Piper," Joel clarified. "They got infected but didn't get sick. And Piper… the infected just ignore her." Tommy stepped back in disbelief. "Tommy," Joel continued. "Tommy, I saw Piper get bit myself. I saw what the infected did. That was months ago. Months. She's immune."

Tommy peered deep into Joel's eyes and saw the truth of sincerity. Quickly checking the door, Tommy stepped closer to Joel. "From the beginning," Tommy asked.

Joel took in a deep breath of air before beginning. "It was Marlene. She hired us to smuggle the girls to some Fireflies. It went bad. Tess got bit. She made me swear to take the kids. It was her dying wish," Joel's voice cracked. "What the hell was I supposed to do? We made it as far as K.C., and then… You know, they saved my life there… from another kid."

Running his fingers over the calluses on his hands, Joel continued. "Five years ago, I would've destroyed him. But Piper had to shoot him to save me. 17 years old. Because I was too slow and too fսck¡n' deaf to hear him comin'. And I saw… I saw a man kill his own brother… to save Ellie while I just watched."

With each word spilling from his mouth, Joel found his strength disappearing. His eyes blurred, and he felt his cheeks grow wet. This was a weakness. He was weak, and he knew it. "And today, I thought that dog was gonna tear the girls apart because it smelled somethin' on them. And all I did was stand there. I couldn't… move. I couldn't think of anything to say. I just… I was so afraid."

"You think I can still handle things, but… I'm not who I was,: Joel admitted and he felt a weight come off his chest. So long he'd been standing tall. For so long, he kept going, kept looking for Tommy. Now that he'd found his brother, Joel didn't know what to do. "I'm weak. Lately, there are these moments where the fear comes up outta nowhere, and… my heart… feels like it's stopped. And I have dreams. Every night."

"What kinda dreams?" Tommy interjected.

Joel grabbed the side of his head. "I don't know. I can't remember. I just know that when I wake up… I've lost somethin','' he sobbed. "I'm failin' in my sleep. That's all I do. It's all I've ever done is fail them again and again."

Tommy's expression softened as the puzzle of Joel's words came together. "You want me to take the girls," Tommy concluded.

Joel couldn't help but nod as the tears rolled down his face. "I'm just gonna get them killed. I know it. I have to leave them."

"Joel…"Tommy tried to comfort him.

"I mean, it's why you took off on me, right? To make up for the things we did?" Joel said. "Well, here's your chance to bring your kid into a better world. You're younger than me. You're still strong. You said it yourself: you'll come back. You have to take them." Joel sniffled and wiped his cheeks; his pleading exchanged for something more protective. Joel admitted to his brother the truth and discovered a truth of his own. He cared for the girls. They were his girls, whether he liked it or not. It just happened, and he knew he'd die if anything befell them. His heart would be torn into shreds if he couldn't save them, just like he couldn't save Sarah. He knew now why he wanted to refuse Piper's wish, why he didn't want Ellie to pick up a gun, and why he hated hearing about what his girls had gone through. Joel was a father through and through, and Piper and Ellie were not his girls.

"And you can't tell anyone, not even Maria. Tommy, you're the only one I trust," Joel begged. "If anyone else sees those bites on her, what's under her skin… they'll shoot her. It's the last thing I'll ever ask of you. I swear."

Tommy was quiet for a moment before answering. The words that came out of his mouth only relieved Joel. "I'll take them out at dawn. We got you in 38. It's left, left, right."

꧁_꧂

Speckles of white in Piper's hair sparkled under the yellow street lights. She'd left her hair down. The feeling was foreign to her but freeing. Maybe in the future, she'd continue to keep her hair down.

Smiling, she looked down at the snow; her new boots repelled the water and cold. It was a nice change from the leaky shoes she had worn before.

The sound of snow crunching doubled, and Piper looked up. She saw her sister, head hung low, marching towards her.

"Els," Piper called out. Ellie kept walking. "Do you know where the movie is?"

Ellie brushed past her sister, pausing long enough to answer her. "Movie sucks ass," Ellie mumbled.

Piper stopped and turned around. "Hey, is everything-"

"I'm fine," Ellie hissed. "What happened to your hands?"

Piper looked down, "Nothing, scraped them that's all. The doctor was nice enough to bandage them up."

"You sick?" Ellie asked.

Piper was sure that the snow was falling harder now. She shivered. "Yeah…just a cold, though, nothing too bad." Ellie nodded. Speaking of the doctor, I asked about the…" Piper paused, unsure of how to say it. "Ellie, it's not going to work."

Ellie looked up and frowned. "What's not gonna work?" Piper only responded in silence, and from the look on her sister's face, Ellie knew what Piper was going to say. "No. It'll fucking work."

"Els," Piper pleaded.

"No!" Ellie bellowed, shoving Piper's shoulders.

Piper gasped, "Els, listen to me. I asked the doct-"

Ellie's face scrunched up, and her ears rang as a mantra of no repeated in her mind. The next thing she knew, her fist had found its way into Piper's face. Anger and hurt flooded from her soul down her fist and implanted itself onto Piper's body. Too much had been stolen from the girl, and she wasn't going to let Piper take anything else. She wasn't going to let the one thing keeping her going disappear from view. She had to save everyone. She had to get rid of the fungus that had robbed her of a future and the world of anything good. First, her mom, then Riley, Tess, Henry, and Sam. Soon, Joel was going to leave, too. She had heard him beg his brother, and now Piper was going to take away her objective.

With each punch, Ellie found her drive even more controlling. Her fear, anger, and pain took over and governed her actions. It was as if she couldn't hear her sister's pleas or feel the blood trickling down Piper's face and spilling into the snow, tainting it a vibrant red.

"Ellie!" Piper coughed, spitting out blood onto the snow.

Ellie froze. Her chest heaved up and down. The snowing made everything too blurry, or maybe it was the tears escaping Ellie's eyes. Her hands burned from the warmth of Piper's blood and the fog of her mind faded.

Scrambling to stand, Ellie took one look at her sister in the snow. Piper lay on her side in the snow. Wheezing coughs escaped her lungs as blood from her nose and mouth pooled on the snow, melting it. Bruises had already started to form on Piper's skin, turning shades of blue and purple. The same purple of Ellie's coat.

Seeing her sister's pain, Ellie was overcome with guilt. Her heart pounded, and her breath stilled. All she could do was watch or run away, so she did. She ran deep into the snow storm and back to the ghost of a home she was staying in.

By the time the footsteps of Ellie's boots had been erased by the storm, Piper still hadn't moved. She was freezing, bleeding, and in pain. However, it wasn't the pain of the physical wounds Ellie had given her that hurt. Ellie had left. She had hurt Ellie, even if the full truth hadn't been revealed. She had ripped the band-aid off too soon and the wound had grown infected.

As Piper lay in the snow, she grew numb to the cold and the pain. In fact, she welcomed it. She'd been living for Ellie, protecting her, watching over her. After all, it was her and Ellie until the end. She'd said that phrase so many times that the irony scalded her soul. Ellie was marching to the end. An end to save an imaginary world in her head. An end that Piper knew she'd follow her sister into. If Ellie was going to walk into the arms of death, so would Piper. No matter how much she desired to live. No matter how much she didn't want to leave Joel. Nothing mattered when her sister was on the line. Piper had made a promise, and she was going to keep it. Even if it meant dying for a cause she no longer believed in. Even if it meant she had to give up her real dream: the home with Joel and Ellie. The smile on her sister's face, the warmth of Joel's protective hug. The dream of a family.

"Piper?" a distorted voice asked, and soon, a weight was placed on her shoulder. It was Charlie. He was leaning over her now. Looking up, Piper noticed a crowd. People had circled around her, and their whispers thundered in her head.

"Piper, what happened?" Charlie asked. The concern and worry in his voice was apparent.

Piper didn't need his concern. She didn't want it. After all, what good was a stranger's concern if you knew you were going to die? If you knew you were going to lose everything. If you knew you'd be alone.

Smacking away Charlie's hand and pushing him into the snow, Piper stood up and wiped away the blood. She ignored Charlie's pleas and the gasps of the townspeople. Fuck them, Piper thought as she marched through the storm and into the darkness after her sister.

Wherever Ellie went, so did Piper.

꧁_꧂

The house was quiet. If it weren't for the light that trickled out of Ellie's room, Joel would have thought the home was empty. The wooden stairs creaked as Joel trudged up them. His feet carried him as far as the door before he stopped. His hand inches away from knocking.

"Ellie?" Joel called out. There was no response, so he gently pushed the door open and found Ellie sitting on the windowsill. A journal in her hands.

"Is this really all they had to worry about?" Ellie asked. "Boys. Movies. Deciding which shirt goes with which skirt. It's bizarre."

Joel shoved his hands into his pockets and stepped closer, fumbling with his feet. "Listen, um…"

"Why are you here?"

"I came here to talk to you," Joel replied, confused by Ellie's harsh tone of voice.

"No, why are you still here? If you're gonna ditch me, ditch me," Ellie spat and glared at the man.

Joel sighed and felt his lips form into a frown. "What exactly did you hear?"

"I have to leave her. You have to take her," Ellie mocked Joel's deep voice. "You know, I stood up for you today because I thought…" Hurt echoed in her words, and Ellie turned away, trying to fight back tears. Everyone was leaving her.

"I made this decision for your own good," Joel stated.

"Just like Piper?" Ellie muttered with clenched fists. Her hands still burned from her sister's blood.

Joel shook his head, unsure of what Ellie meant. "You'll be way better off with Tommy." "You and Piper," Joel clarified. "Tommy knows the area better than I do…"

Finally turning to face Joel again, Ellie raged, "Do you give a shit about me or not?"

"Of course," Joel defended, and Ellie scoffed. "I do."

"Then what are you so afraid of? I'm not her, you know? Maria told me about Sarah and…" Ellie was cut off.

"Don't," Joel growled. His face hardened, and through clenched teeth, he spoke, "Don't say another word."

Throwing the journal to the side, Ellie stood up. "I-I'm sorry about your daughter, Joel," Ellie said. "But I have lost people, too."

Joel rolled his eyes and stepped back. Hurt flashed in Ellie's eyes. "You have no idea what loss is," Joel stated.

"Everybody I have cared for has either died or left me," Ellie fumed. Her voice grew louder and louder. "Everybody, fսcking except for you and Pi–!" She cut herself short. Joel was leaving, and she had pushed Piper away. There was no way her sister…Ellie bit her lip. She was alone. She was always cursed to be alone. "So don't tell me that I'd be safer with somebody else because the truth is I would just be more scared."

Joel's expression hardened at Ellie's tears. His heart hurt from seeing her tears and hearing her pleas. Right then and there he wanted to tell her he'd change his mind. Say that he'd take them, but he couldn't. Joel was weak. Ellie and Piper made them weak. This was for the best. He was doing this for them.

"You're right. You're not my daughter," Joel growled. "And I sure as hell ain't your dad. Now, come dawn… we're goin' our separate ways."

Ellie scowled and fell back down on the bed. She hugged her legs in close and turned away from Joel, burying her head in between her knees. "Good luck telling Piper that."

The door creaked behind them, and then Joel heard it. It was the sound of Piper running away. He pinched the sides of his nose and walked out of Ellie's room. This was for the best. As long as he kept telling himself that maybe this whole thing would become a bit easier. He just had to tell Piper, and his pain would be over. His weaknesses would be gone.

At least it would be if he could find Piper. He scoured the entire house: every single room, bathroom, in the dark corners, underneath the furniture. Piper was gone. His heart tightened in his chest until he heard her cough. It was coming from the porch. Piper was outside in the cold.

Joel didn't care how the cold bit at his skin when he saw Piper huddled in the corner. Her body trembled, fighting off the cold. She looked so small compared to how tall she stood. Her once-strong persona crumbled underneath Joel's gaze. Piper was just a kid in a big, scary world. And no matter how long Joel stood staring at her, he couldn't find any words of assurance.

"Don’t leave," Piper whimpered. Given how quiet she had been, Joel wasn't even sure he heard it correctly, so he stood there and watched.

"Please don’t leave," she said a bit louder.

"Look, kid," Joel sighed, stepping closer to her. His heart broke when he saw her tear-stained face peering up at him.

"No, Joel, you listen to me," she pleaded as she reached out to him before pulling back. Her hands turned white as she clung to herself. There was no one else. Ellie was leaving, and so was Joel. Piper was utterly alone. "I got sick and–I never get sick. I never let myself get sick. I couldn’t get–Please don’t leave." Her voice struggled to keep still as the trembles of a lifetime of loss, hurt, and fear overcame her.

"Let’s get you inside," Joel gently suggested as he watched her shiver. His hands unconsciously reached out to hold her, but she pulled back and shook her head.

"No. No, Joel, you’re not listening," she said.

"Piper, I can’t."

Piper sobbed. "Joel, please. I can’t lose you too. I already lost El–everyone. I’ve been fighting for so long I don’t remember what it's like to be safe, but I’m safe with you." Piper peered up at Joel. His eyes were cold. Piper searched and couldn't salvage the safe haven she had found in them before. "I–Please don’t leave. Please don’t leave me," she begged for the last time as her voice failed her.

He had to do it. He was doing it for her, for her and Ellie. It was for the best. Joel repeated these lies over and over until he found enough false strength to turn away. "You should go inside and get some sleep," he suggested with his voice void of emotion. Tommy will take you in the morning." Then he opened the door and left the shell of a young girl to freeze in the cold.

By the time Piper stood up and crawled back inside, she couldn't feel anything. She couldn't feel her hair falling to the ground as she cut it off. All she could hear was the roaring scissors snip as her hair grew shorter inch by inch. She was losing everything: her sister, her purpose, her home, her family, her dream, and Joel. With each cut of the scissors, she felt her pain dull more and more until there was no more hair to cut.

Her beautiful dark hair clung to the sink and bathroom floor. In the middle stood Piper. Her skin was a bright red as heat seeped back under her skin. Dried blood stuck to her skin and clothes. Her bandages were frozen from the cold. She'd have to change them again, but that was for later. All she could do was stand and stare at the ghost she saw in the mirror.

꧁_____________꧂ 

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꧁_____________꧂ 

[apomaro-mellow]

Mafia AU 1/?

Mafia shorts scenes (as a primer)

In Eddie’s defense, he was never given a chance. It wasn’t just a shitty dad that kept him from reaching whatever potential he might’ve had. Even his Uncle Wayne, as righteous as he was, had his shoes stuck in the muck. That is to say all the Munsons had a dirty record of some kind. Eddie was only twelve the first time he got caught stealing and had been chased out of the mom-and-pop store with a bag of candies. 

If you came from a good family with money, being a bull-headed alpha was a status symbol. But when you came from nothing, you were just a no good troublemaker who didn’t know his place. That was what Eddie’s dad told him anyway, when he presented.

“If you’re a Munson, life’s out to get ya. And you’re about to go through the worst of it”, Al said as his son felt the change coming upon him.

His Uncle Wayne told him there was no Munson curse. They may have had a shit lot in life but as long as a man had a code, he’d find his way. Eddie’s mother didn’t have much to say about their situation. She had been sick for as long as he could remember and never liked to dwell on negative topics much.

Sometimes it was an appreciated break from his life. Sometimes Eddie wished she’d just talk to him about going on. He didn’t even realize how sick she was until it was too late. Until she was in a hospital and saying goodbye. Until some guys in suits came to collect.

Apparently Al had taken on some loans to help with his wife’s ailments. He told his brother and son not to worry about it. That he’d figure it out. And like a fool, Eddie believed him. 

The sound of the gavel sentencing his father to prison would echo in his heart for years to come. Eddie watched his dad get escorted out of the courtroom and saw himself. The sad thing was, there was nothing he could do to stop it. His greatest skills were lockpicking, pickpocketing, and cow tipping.

So, one parent in a coffin, the other in the clink, and zero prospects. What a life he led. To his credit, Wayne tried to keep Eddie at a distance from the seedier stuff. Eddie got a job at the local bar. He stayed on the straight and narrow for about a week before he started running drugs in the back. 

The business got the attention of a family that had their hands in a lot of work in this town - the Marini family. The same family that had loaned Al that money. And the exact same one that Wayne was taking small jobs for to both repay the debt and keep the lights on.

“This is Wayne’s boy.”

“Not his boy, his nephew.”

“His pop’s in jail, that makes him his boy.”

Eddie was leaning against the wall behind the bar, having been accosted by a couple of Marini goons. He didn’t know exactly who they were, but knew enough to clock them as lower level.

But they offered him a gig and he was in need of the cash. He was always in need of the cash. Doing so without consulting his uncle got him a cuffed ear but it was way worth it to see the look on Tonio’s face when he popped the target before he could even get his gun out. They saw Eddie as just some fodder. A two-bit criminal with no future.

But as both he and Wayne took on more favors, opinions of them began to turn. They started to get more respect. They started to get bigger payouts. And eventually, they started getting invited to gatherings.

It was at one of these gatherings, that he finally set his eyes on the upper members of the family. It was at such an event, that he saw the boss’ son, smelling for all the world like a sweet, rich omega - Steve Harrington.

Part 2

[dira333]

Doomed to love you - Kakuzu x Reader

Warning: Angst with a bit of fluff, Dark Themes, no happy end - it's Kakuzu after all...

Words: 4,6k - tagging @snuggleboots, @missalienqueen and @wing-ed-thing because I think you might like it

Bonus points if you get what the Kid's names are all about...

10.

His father’s hand is heavy on Kakuzu’s shoulder.

Across from him, your mother does the same with you. 

You’re shorter than him, your long hair tied into pigtails. There’s the ghost of freckles over your nose, but it could also be the sunlight, broken into a million pieces by the cascading waterfall Takigakure is soon going to be famous for.

You look like a kid, which shouldn’t be that weird. He’s just got ten years old himself.

But everyone at the Academy aims to look older while you seem perfectly fine looking the way you are.

The grip on his shoulder changes, shakes him out of his reverie.

He looks up at his father who stares down at him. Right. Don’t expect any help from the old man.

When he turns toward you, you’ve put your hands in front of your mouth as if to hide a smile. Your mother looks tired.

“Shake hands.” She tells you - or him?

So he does, stretches out his hand for you to take, and watches with almost morbid fascination as you lean down and press your lips to the back of his hand.

By the laws of his and your Clan, you’re married now. 

There are no laws for Divorce in Takigakure yet.

-

Your mother dies a year later.

You move in with him because he’s your husband and has to care for you. His father likes to remind him of that every time there’s not enough food on the table for all three of you. 

A good man, his father declares, makes sure that his wife has enough to eat.

A good father, Kakuzu wants to throw back at him, would make sure his child doesn’t have to go hungry. But he doesn’t. Because while he might not be scared of anything, he’s too smart to get into trouble with the old man. It’s less risky to stay hungry and give his portion to you.

By the time he’s twelve, he’s doing odd jobs on the side whenever he can, handing you the money whenever he’s sure no one can see it. 

You’re a quiet one. He’s too tired to talk most nights anyway, so he’s glad you don’t chew off his ear when it’s time to slip into bed at night.

Ever since his father took up drinking and lost the house, they share a single room and huddle together for warmth at night. 

-

“Kakuzu,” You whisper. His eyes snap open, Kunai ready. It takes him a moment to realize it’s you. You haven’t spoken in so long he’s forgotten the sound of your voice.

“What?”

“Sh.” You move a little closer. Your legs are warm against his. He’s never noticed before how warm you are. “Don’t wake your father. I’ve got a job.”

“A job?” He furrows his brows. “You should still be in school.”

“Like they teach me anything useful.” You quip back at him. “There’s this rich family who’s got a gaggle of kids. I make one hundred ryō an hour looking after them.”

His mouth waters at the number. One hundred ryō could buy him a decent meal every night.

“How many hours are we talking?”

They get to planning. Two days later everything is set in motion. They move out while his father is out drinking, taking with them what little stuff they can find use in. There are no rules that forbid them from signing a lease on an apartment now that he’s a full-fledged Shinobi, even at twelve years old. 

You celebrate your first night with a home-cooked meal, the best he’s ever tasted. Sure the Miso soup could have used a little bit more salt and the fish had been charred at the edges, but there was no one looming over him, taking away all the good pieces, ruining every conversation with drunken rambling.

“I will never be like my father.” He promises and you smile. It lights up your face, and transforms you into a being of light and lightness. 

Kakuzu’s only twelve years old, but he’s seen death and he’s seen misery and he knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that if this is what love is, he will never get tired of it.

-

Kakuzu’s fifteen when he catches an illness that almost kills him.

Painful spasms shake him as he coughs, skin aflame with a fever that wants to devour him whole.

He barely remembers anything but finding himself with his head in your lap, your hands moving through his hair.

There’s a strange lightness to your voice as you talk to him. He can barely focus on your words but they sound like magic, like you’re summoning something from deep inside him.

When he wakes up from a deep slumber days later you look younger, somehow.

“What was that about?” He asks from the safety of his bed. One day, soon, he will buy a new mattress and a proper Couch, but it held out the last three years and he wants to have a bit more saved, feel a bit safer before he starts splurging again.

“What do you mean?” You’re at the stove, cooking something. He can smell ginger and citrus. You’re a terrible liar.

“You know what I mean.”

“No, Kakuzu, I don’t know what you mean.”

“Don’t bullshit me!” His temper comes and goes like a lightning strike, leaving him weak and shivering.

You stare back at him, eyes wide.

“I’m sorry.” He crawls out of bed. “I’m sorry.”

-

Kakuzu is fifteen when he finally understands the terms and conditions of this marriage.

Some Kekkai Genkais let you live longer than others. 

On paper, it could be really just that simple. Your Kekkai Genkai lets you live on for years and years and years, your only threat the darkness of your mind.

“Many of us have killed themselves after they lost their partners.” You explain with his head in your lap again, your hand in his hair.

“Is that what happened to your mother?” You don’t answer his question but he can tell the truth from the way your eyes lose their light.

“But why me?” Kakuzu asks, two days later when you’ve curled up next to him after Dinner. 

“I have two theories,” you explain softly. “Your Clan has brought forward many members with an exceptionally long lifespan.”

“And the other theory?”

“My Kekkai Genkai feeds on negative emotions. Misery. Sickness.” You fall silent. He doesn’t need you to keep going. He knows his family.

His father, who’s still not managed to drink himself to death. Whose temper is so famous that he’s often sent on three-man-missions alone. 

His grandfather, who’s rumored to have killed his first wife over a burnt meal. Who’s still alive because he’s too stubborn to die, living off the roots of the great tree on the edge of Takigakure.

“I’ll never be like my father.” He promises you, again. You press a kiss to the back of his hand like you did when you met for the first time. It’s the only answer you give him. 

-

Kakuzu is eighteen when his comrades make jokes about his wife.

They call her the beauty of Takigakure, say she’s even prettier because she never opens her mouth.

He gets cut from the mission roster for two weeks because he breaks one guys chin, and stabs the other guy in the thigh.

If you mind the blow to your wallet, you don’t show it. You’ve always been good at making a decent meal with the least amount of money spent.

But you sit him down when it happens again, a few months later.

“Stop it,” you tell him. “You’re becoming like your father.”

Fear engulfs him. He feels like he’s drowning, like that time he was six and his father threw him into the big cave, told him to swim or sink. 

Warm lips press onto his, breathe oxygen into his lungs. He holds onto your waist to keep himself from going under once again. 

As long as you’re there, as long as he has you, he will be able to keep afloat.

-

20.

Kakuzu turns twenty just two days before his daughter is born.

She’s got his eyes and your hair, his voice and your eerie stare.

You take one look at her and shake your head, sorrow washing over your features.

“What?” He asks, scared for his life. He’s never seen anything as precious as this little thing in your arms, that’s living and breathing and depending on him. 

“She hasn’t got my Kekkai Genkai.” You say, the words like a knife to his heart.

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent.”

The nurse, an old woman that helps with births and the like for a few scraps of meat and a few coins on the side, pats your head.

“What a beautiful healthy thing you’ve got. Cherish it, will you?”

He can see the light dim in your eyes. He makes a promise to himself that even though it might flicker, he will make sure that it does not go out. Ever.

-

Kakuzu likes this little life of his.

He likes waking up to his daughter on his chest, gurgling and garbling, grabbing everything her little hands can get. He likes the sight of you feeding her, how her cheeks are plump and warm, her belly full of milk. He likes seeing you in the village unexpectedly, knowing that the bundle tied to your front is the living, breathing proof that you like him enough, that he might even love you. 

It makes everything seem a little less burdensome. Passing his father in the streets, pretending not to hear the insults. Gong on missions that aren’t paid nearly enough for the danger they bring. The lack of good meat on the market, the hunger of the people in the streets. 

Being able to come home to you, to your soft smiles and his daughters quiet mumbles.

He could live like this, he thinks. Forever, if necessary.

But his daughter is named Fū, after the soft winds that come and go. 

When she’s just two, a sickness falls over the village. You do everything you can but just as the wind does not stay, neither does Fū.

-

Silence has fallen over his home.

Silence has fallen over Takigakure.

There are mornings when he hardly gets out of bed. There’s barely enough money in his pocket to afford the few scraps of meat that are offered at the market. But the beer is cheap.

If he drinks one, he can almost forget the way Fū looked in his arms. If he drinks five, he can almost forget she ever existed.

-

There’s a sharp pain in his left leg.

Kakuzu blinks himself awake and tries to pull away. 

“Stop it.” Your voice is hard and cold.

“What-”

“You stepped into broken glass.” You tell him. “I’m sewing you back together.”

“Don’t.” He mutters meekly. 

“Why not?”

“I don’t-” He stops. He doesn’t know.

“You promised, remember? You wouldn’t become like your father.”

“I’m not-”

“Kakuzu.” You move, your face now above his. You’ve turned younger again. Have you taken all his misery? 

“You should just leave me.”

“I will never, ever leave you.” From you, it sounds more like a threat than a promise. He closes his eyes for a second. Fū blinks back at him. He opens his eyes again.

“What do you want?”

“For you to stop drinking.”

“Granted. What else?”

You falter. “I-”

He sits up and grabs your arms. You’re so close now he can taste your breath. It’s a good thing Fū never got your eyes. There’s a truth in them he will probably never get used to.

“I’ll tell you.” You promise. “Not today. But I will tell you.”

-

He does not touch a drop of alcohol ever again.

Six months later he’s one of the most renowned Shinobi of his village, not that it pays much.

Konoha is a steadily rising threat in the distance but at least the crop is good this year, leaving everyone well fed.

When he returns home from yet another mission, bruised and bloodied, loneliness hanging off him like a second skin, you take his hands and press it to your belly.

“I want to be a mother.” You tell him, eyes alight. “Again and again and again.”

Kakuzu almost shatters at the prospect.

He’s barely survived losing Fū. How can he go through that again?

But he owes you. For keeping him alive. For giving him Fū. For liking him enough.

He watches your belly grow and wishes for a way to know if this one will inherit your Kekkai Genkai or the lack of his.

Two days after his second child kicks for the first time, he’s called to the village leader.

The mission is as simple as it’s deadly. Kill Hashirama Senju. 

He will not survive. He will not see his child grow up. But he will also not have to see it die.

Still, there’s something he can do about this. Milk the opportunities he’s got. 

“What’s in it for me?” He asks, his nose lifted to the sky. “I have a family to feed.”

You’ve never clung to him as tightly as you do the day he leaves.

When you kiss him goodbye he can taste the words you’ll never say.

Don’t go. Don’t leave me behind. I love you.

He bends down and presses a kiss to the swell of your belly.

“Take care of your mother for me.”

-

You must have bewitched him. Cursed him in his sleep.

That’s the only reason he can find why he survives. It had been a suicide mission after all.

He returns home, glad to be alive. He’s stopped at the village entrance, dragged through different caves than those who’d lead him home. To you. To the child that’s about to be born.

Kakuzu misses all of it. 

Instead, he’s sentenced to life in prison. And for what? For not dying on a mission that was meant to kill him?

He’s too proud to beg for forgiveness. But he asks for word on you. 

They refuse him even that.

All that’s left is Fū, who visits him in his sleep. And you, whose voice he can hear in every waking hour. It’s the only thing keeping him from going insane. 

-

The gurgling laughter alerts him.

It’s a sound that doesn’t belong in a prison.

“Shhhh….” A voice whispers. He knows that voice.

He calls your name, desperate to prove to himself that he hasn’t lost his mind.

You step out of the shadows into a lone ray of sunshine breaking through the cave walls. You’ve gotten a little older. Life up there must have been treating you well.

There’s a bundle tied to your front. You step closer, lift the bundle through the bars that have been made to keep out grown men, not a newborn baby.

“Her name is Mito,” you tell him quietly. “She’s got my Kekkai Genkai.”

Mito. To hope, to wish, to desire. It’s a fitting name for the little girl that’s peering up at him. She’s got your eyes, too. 

“I’ve not been a good husband to you.” He tells you. “You should leave me. Find someone who’s a better fit for you.”

His words say one thing. His arms cradling Mito close another.

You reach one hand through the bars, cradle his cheek. 

“I’m bound to you.” You state. “I will go nowhere without you.”

Kakuzu looks down at Mito, how she fits into his arms just as perfectly as Fū did.

“What life can I give you?” He asks the little girl. Her chubby fingers try to grab the marks on his hands. Prison tattoos. 

Your thumb presses against his cheekbone. His eyes flicker up to yours. There’s a determination in them he’s never seen before.

“I’m bound to you.” You repeat. “Not to this village.”

-

Kakuzu feels strangely nostalgic as he leaves the city, four beating hearts and a forbidden Jutsu in his possession.

In a way, it’s just like when you fled his fathers house, took everything with you what you could use. 

This time he’s not holding your hand through it.

This time you’re waiting on the other side of the cave system, the little ox wagon hidden from sight.

Mito sleeps soundly when he arrives, bloodied and proud.

She sleeps through everything. Her parents departure from the only place they ever called home. Her father's transformation through Earth Grudge Fear. 

He briefly wonders if she notices a difference when she looks at him. If his little girl can tell the difference between the man he was before and the man he is now.

Because he can tell that it has changed you.

You grow older outside of Takigakure. There’s not enough Misery to sustain you. One morning he wakes up to crowfeet around your eyes. He finds a grey hair on your head a week later.

It brings a new fear to his life.

And fear brings out demons he didn’t know he carried.

The little house he built for you lies in ruins over a fit of anger.

Mito hides behind you, fear in her eyes that look so much like you. 

He’s breathing hard, doesn’t even know why he flipped in the first place.

You rake a hand through his hair, pull him close until your heads touch.

He can taste your breath, can feel the misery lift off him.

“Tomorrow,” you tell him calmly, “You will leave. Go on a mission. Bring me back a son.”

-

50.

He’s fifty now. 

Mito got married last year. He barely sees her anymore.

There’s a clear distaste in her voice when she speaks to him.

She looks at him like he looked at his father.

Does she promise her husband that she will never be like her father?

Does he believe her?

Because Kakuzu has seen what her temper can do. 

She’s his daughter after all.

Yet, he believes in the power of names. He believes that she can be what she desires.

His youngest daughter is two months old. You named her Rin in his absence.

He’s missed her birth, Han’s too. But he held your hand through Yagura’s birth, pretended not to shatter on the inside when you took one look at the little boy.

“He’s not got the Kekkai Genkai.” 

Still. Yagura might be his favorite child.

He’s a quiet boy. Likes to hide behind Utakata when no one’s looking for him. 

Utakata is his oldest living child, found on that first mission that you sent him on.

“Bring me back a son,” you had said and he’d thought it nonsense until he stumbles over him, starving on the side of the road.

-

Kakuzu doesn’t mind coming home now. He doesn’t mind staying away either.

It’s a fragile thing, this thing between the two of you.

Should he call it love? He doesn’t have anything to compare it to.

He knows you’re never lonely, not with the gaggle of kids that run around your feet all day. He knows you won’t age, not when there’s almost always a kid that cries because it got hurt in one way or another. Not when there’s a growing village nearby, of farmers and their women, with a baker and a monk, all of them looking for someone to tell their sorrows to.

He knows his temper is better left outside his home, directed at people who have the misfortune of crossing him at the wrong time in the wrong place.

Yet he longs to be by your side just as much as you long to have him with you.

He can tell by the way you pull him close when he’s home. How there’s no one allowed to sleep in your bed but him. 

When you kiss him, he feels like everything will turn out all right, eventually.

When you hold him close he can almost forget the way Fū looked the day she died.

When he’s got his arms around you, nose buried in your hair he can pretend he won’t die the day Yagura dies.

-

67.

Long before he turns seventy, Kakuzu understands how you feel.

He still looks barely past thirty. It might be Earth Grudge Fear or a Kekkai Genkai his Clan never bothered to explore, but you and he both have lived too many years on this cruel earth to still be this young.

He’s so tired. 

Mito lost her first child to a famine.

Yagura lost an arm trying to save Utakata from a mob. So what if his son was born in the land of water? That does not take away his right to live!

There will never be an end to this madness, this sorrow.

There will never be an end to your life if you don’t make sure of it.

“Don’t die.” He tells you at night.

“Don’t die.” You tell him when you see him off.

There’s but a thin line separating the two of you from death and it’s the other's presence.

He cannot leave you behind. He will not leave you behind.

If this isn’t love, what is?

-

81.

Kakuzu’s barely over eighty when he meets Pain.

Bright orange hair and eyes as cold and determined as yours.

He pretends he’s not interested. But he is.

He’s long grown impatient of this world. Of its neverending cycle of pain and misery and sorrow. Why must his children die? Why must you suffer to stay alive? Why must he stay away from you to keep you safe yet come back to make sure you keep on living?

Mito barely looks at him now. 

She’s learned by now that she can never outrun his temper. It’s etched into her bones.

Yagura has grown almost silent after the loss of yet another of his siblings.

He’s a grown man, hair turning grey, yet he still crawls into his father's lap when he’s home. 

He wants to go back to the simple days. 

If only he could turn back time. 

If only he could hold Fū one more time. 

-

91.

Hidan trails behind him.

There’s movement in the bushes. 

Hidan reacts immediately, draws his scythe, curses loudly.

“Shut up.” Kakuzu gnarls. His hand shoots out, catches the perpetrator around the neck.

It’s a little girl, Kunai drawn. His mouth turns dry at the sight. Her eyes remind him of his little Rin, never mind the fact that Rin’s already got three kids of her own.

“Let me down!” She screams bloody murder at him. He drops her like she asked for. She runs away with bloody knees.

“Aw, why did you let her get away?” Hidan asks. “I could have sacrificed her.”

“Take grown-ups for that.” He huffs. 

They rest in an inn that night.

Kakuzu thinks of you like he always does when he counts his money. He should check in with you soon, to make sure you’ve got enough for the next months. Winter has been hard this year and you’ve picked up another stray. He got a beetle plush at a fair last month, won it in one of those rare moments when Hidan’s occupied with something stupid. He knows Yagura is going to love it.

“We do offer some special fun if you’re interested.” The innkeeper's grin speaks volumes.

“What do you have in mind?” Kakuzu asks. He’ll kill the guy if he gives him a reason to.

And the guy is stupid enough to do so, dragging a filthy little girl out of the kitchen.

It’s the girl that tried to trap them in the woods earlier, clothes filthy from crawling around the kitchen.

“How much for her?” Kakuzu asks before he can stop himself. The girls' eyes remind him of Fū in this low light. The price is low, telling of the man’s desperation. Or maybe he’s just not a good businessman.

“I’ll take her.” He pays upfront and demands another serving of food, pushing it toward the girl who’s now sitting next to him, trying to crawl into herself. 

“Eat.” He demands roughly. “You’re nothing but skin and bones.”

“I’ll let you have your fun then.” The innkeeper moves backward, a slimy grin distorting his face.

“Hidan,” Kakuzu’s tone lacks any emotion. “Take care of him. But be quiet about it.”

-

They leave the next morning a little richer - dead innkeepers don’t need any live savings - and with a child slowing them down.

“What’s that all about? You a pedophile?” Hidan eyes the kid curiously.

“Shut up.” 

They turn away from the main road.

It’s less than two days over the mountains if they keep moving at this pace. Most of the time he’s got to carry the kid anyway.

“What’s your name?” Hidan asks the first night when they’re sharing a rabbit Kakuzu caught.

“Kushina.” The girl says before directing her eyes at Kakuzu. “Are you going to kill me?”

“Why should I?” He asks roughly. “There’s no meat on you.”

-

A rustling in the bushes gives him away.

Kakuzu stops short, hand outstretched to keep Hidan back.

“Yagura.” He calls. “I’ve already spotted you.”

Yagura steps out with a smile. His hair has turned almost completely grey yet his eyes are that of a child.

“Have you got me a present?” He asks.

“Why would I get you one? You still suck at hiding.”

Yagura just laughs, stills when he spots Kushina.

“Oh! You brought me a friend!” He crouches down in front of the girl, his remaining hand outstretched. “Hi. I’m Yagura. Do you want to meet my Mom? She likes children.”

Kushina looks up at Kakuzu as if asking for directions. He jerks his head, telling her to go.

Yagura whisks her away, never as quick on his feet as when he’s presented with a new sibling.

Hidan’s muttering something behind him.

Right. He shouldn’t have brought him here.

“Listen.” He mutters darkly. “You can turn around and go back to the village we came from. I’m going to meet you there in a week.”

“No way.” Hidan grins. “I want to see what you’ve got hidden in the woods. Some secret family?”

“So what?” Kakuzu gnarls. “If you dare to threaten them-”

Hidan falls silent, face strangely void of any emotion. 

“Fine.” He huffs eventually. “But if you’re late, I’ll leave without you.” He turns back, coat swishing behind him as he moves quickly.

Kakuzu’s not sure what he did to be granted such a favor, but he’s not going to second guess it.

He rarely gets time off as it is.

-

Kushina’s already laughing freely with Yagura by the time he has to leave again.

All those years of misery forgotten in just a few days.

You pull him close, hug him tight.

You barely look older than thirty. 

Most people tell you that life must have treated you well.

Kakuzu knows the truth.

“What’s your next target?” You ask.

“The main one in the land of fire.” He recalls. “The nine tails.”

“That’s the worst one, right?” You ask. There’s something scratching at the back of your throat.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m so tired.” You tell him. “I’m so tired, Kakuzu. I want to go home.”

“I know.”

He kisses you, tries to tell you through touch what he cannot say with words.

I love you. Don’t leave me. I’m with you till the end.

“This is the last one.” You tell him when he pulls away. “You hear me? No more kids. No more missions.”

He nods. “I promise.” He says but he knows just as well as you do that his promises don’t mean much.

“I love you.” You whisper, for the first time in over eighty years.

You’ve never had to say it before.

Later, when it’s much too late for it, he’ll wonder why you said it.

He’ll regret he never said it back.

[poppadom0912]

Med Students

Characters: Jay Halstead x Reader, Will Halstead

Warnings: Brief mentions of surgery, gossiping/backbiting, scary attendings

Summary: Stupid students don't gossip quiet enough.

A/N: This isn't exactly what I planned. Not too sure if I like it but it is what it is I guess. I'm posting this in commemoration of the last day of Christmas break. I'm very much not looking forward to getting back to normal life.

*****

Strolling into the moderately quiet ED, Jay was pleasantly surprised at the volume and the lack of people sitting in the waiting room. Spying Will behind a computer doing he's not too sure what, he walked up to him, nudging him with his elbow.

"Hey, you know where Y/N is?" Jay asked, leaning his back against the desk as his eyes inspected the ED.

"Hey Will, how are you brother? How's your day? How's work? You good?" Will sarcastically replied, changing his tone as he imitated Jay. "It's good to see you too Jay."

"What's up Will?" Jay rolled his eyes, caving into his older brothers 'wants and needs'. He was on a schedule and it needed to be followed because if he wasn't back at work in an hour, Voight would probably have his head.

"Mrs Halstead is currently in surgery, she might be a minute but you shoulda seen the guy." Will started gushing, lowkey geeking out on the patient that was brought in. "He was pushed onto the road, had like threes cars max run over him and he somehow is still alive and breathing. Her and Connor have been in their for two hours now, who knows when they'll finish."

"Thanks man." Jay said, clapping Will on the shoulder but either brother made indication that they were moving, Will was doing his patients charts and Jay had nowhere else to be for the next hour.

"I've heard they're called the 'Amok'."

"But we're doctors?"

"I know right, that's what I said!"

"Omg, how could they let a dude like that teach a bunch of students?"

"I knew I should've gone to Lakeshore."

Jay rose his brow in suspicion and curiosity. Looking over at the small group of young adults, standing not too far from where the brothers stood since they could clearly make out their whispers. It was clear that were out of their league.

"And who are they?" Jay asked, crossing his arms, not realising that his action made his badge and gun stand out more than they already were.

Will looked up from the computer, following Jay's line of sight before shaking his head, huffing with some sort of smile. "It's that time of year again, we get sent a bunch of students and Y/N decided that she'd give them a try instead of Ethan. Something about doing it before he got here and missing teaching."

"Huh." Jay said to himself, not recalling you telling him anything about this. If you'd been this excited about teaching, he was sure you'd be gushing about it to him several times over most meals you shared.

"Maybe he's hot."

"Or he's old and a creep."

"What if he's a pedo?!"

"Then he'd be fired Janet. Have you seen Ms Goodwin, cause she's scary."

"What if the 'Amok' is a woman?"

...

"Maybe she's hot."

"Or she's really nice and totally not strict."

"We'll have this year in the bag, easy."

"What if she'd like a young doctor? Look around us and there's plenty of young docs."

"Are you trying to get into her pants? Ew dude!"

"Heck yeah man!"

Now, Jay was ticked. These kids were speculating and it totally would've been fine if they weren't making such comments, especially about his wife. Will also caught on, rolling his eyes, sharing Jay's frustration.

While the students were surveying the ED as they gossiped, they lay eyes on Jay and before any comment could be made on his gorgeous appearance, they caught sight of his gun and badge sitting on his belt.

"Shit, what's a fed doing here?"

"He's hot."

"Him next to doctor Halstead, my ovaries."

"Shh, you're so loud!"

"Anyways, back to the sexy doctor we were talking bout..."

Jay scoffed, more than ready to go up to the kids so he could give them a piece of his mind. Normally, he would've let such petty things get under his skin but these students caught him on the wrong day.

Before Jay could even take a step towards the huddled group, from the corner of his eyes he found the only woman that he loved more than life itself.

You were back in your maroon scrubs, your surgical cap still on your head since you just came back from giving the wife the good news. With the brightest smile on your face, so bright that it could brighten up the darkest of rooms.

The students were obviously doing worse at whispering then they thought. At the same time, you found Jay and the med students that would be shadowing you for the next year.

At the sight of your husband, your smile only got bigger, almost chuckling at your handsome man who looked so delicious but even with most the tension gone from his body, you noticed his crossed arms. Your brother-in-law, who stood besides Jay, wasn't looking in your direction but instead, was glaring at the young adults.

Following his line of sight, you beamed at the students, your excitement causing your smile to widen even further than it already was. Before you could introduce yourself, only taking a few steps towards them, you caught them mid through their conversation.

"50 she'll flirt back."

"You're on."

"Don't be such pigs. The name 'Amok' sounds pretty masculine to me."

"Either way, they're going to kill us."

"That surgeon is hot."

Your smile fell faster than a pulse would if burst a vessel. It seemed that by doing so, you caught the attention of nearly the entire ED, everyone somehow sensing the sudden drop in your mood; the air must've shifted or something.

"And she's staring right at us."

"Oh shit."

"That's it, we're fucked."

"Oh my Gosh, it's her."

"It's been great knowing you guys."

"No it hasn't."

Raising your brows, you inspected the group of students heavily, finding it funny how they shrunk under your scrutinising eyes. It was somewhat entertaining watching them squirm but you'd have a better 'punishment' for them later down the line for their gossiping.

"I want you guys to stick by Maggie's hip. She wants something done, it gets done beyond outstanding standards. I don't care if she wants you getting coffee, you do it. Understood?" You said sternly, leaving no room for any objections.

In sync, they all nodded their heads, instantly agreeing with you even if they weren't happy with their given roles for their first day on the job.

With a smirk, you watched them scurry away towards the charge nurse who was waiting for them. A knowing look in her eyes, a hand on her hip as she smiled and winked at you from afar. You'd find yourself listening to her retell their day at Molly's tonight.

With the students out of your sight, you spun around and your face lit up at the sight of your husband. Despite the dark colours he wore in comparison to your brother-in-law, you noticed and ran to him first.

"Husband!" You wrapped your arms around him tightly, sighing in content when he enveloped you in his, his cologne drowning your senses. You briefly heard Will say something along the lines of no one cared about him before he left you two alone, something about he knew how single he was without it being shoved in his face.

"Wife." Jay kissed your temple, tightening his arms around you. He would proudly say it any day that he was proud of you and found it amusing to watch you boss around the younger doctors.

"How long have you been waiting?" You asked, pulling away from him but not too far so he could still have his arms around you. Hopefully he hadn't been waiting too long and you could still have lunch together before it got too late.

"Long enough to hate those kids guts." Jay pouted slightly, squinting his eyes almost threateningly in remembrance of what was said about you. "Was this close to telling them your the wife of a detective so they'd back off."

"My hero." You pretended to swoon, cheekily smiling at his faux hurt expression. "What would I do without you."

"Forget to eat your lunch, that's what." Jay said, indirectly reminding you that lunch still needed to be eaten.

"Yes! To the cafeteria we go." You smiled, pecking him on the cheek before grabbing his hand, intertwining your fingers with his so you could leave the ED together.

From the corner of your eye, you could feel several eyes following you and Jay as you left and without looking back, you knew who it was. You were sure that tomorrow, you'd be spoken to with much more respect and wariness than what you witnessed today.

The students wouldn't make that mistake again, especially in front of your husband.

[sadhours]

Wicked Sensation

part seventeen // billy hargrove x f!reader

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen | part fourteen | part fifteen | part sixteen | part seventeen

a/n: I’m going through a bit of family stuff but writing is my outlet so i don’t think it should be affected but to play it safe, this is going to be the hardest week of my life and I might get to requests slowly and post chapters slowly but maybe I’ll post more who knows. Anyways, thank you all so much for reading. I appreciate you all endlessly.

word count: 6k

warnings: 18+ minors dni, hey Eddie still exists!, Neil being Neil, pregnancy, smut, oral (m receiving), p in v

tag list: @blue-eyed-lion @bbyhargrove @sweet-villain @actuallyspencerreid @trapistani @sierrahhh @likeanimagepassingby2

Okay, so maybe it’s a bit ridiculous. The man has put a baby in you and is moving in to your parents house, you shouldn’t have to devise a plan to get him to propose to you. You never even pictured yourself in this role before but with all the pregnancy hormones and the devotion you feel towards Billy, the prospect of being his wife and the mother of his kids is insanely appealing. Perhaps this was all Mary’s fault. She’d put the idea in your head and now it was all you could think about.

That’s how you’re awake at the ass crack of dawn with her, making a lunch for Billy to take to his first day at your dads shop. You think that maybe if you start doing wife type things, Billy will realize how badly he wants to marry you.

“You wake up this early every morning?” you ask, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

Mary smiles wide as she pours you a cup of coffee, “How do you think I get anything done?”

“There’s like more than 12 hours left of today, that seems like too much time,” you complain as you hear footsteps down the hall.

You turn to see a sleepy, messy haired Billy with an unlit cigarette perched between his lips already. That same familiar feeling warming your chest and making you swoon whenever you see him. He walks into the kitchen, pulling the cigarette from his mouth to lean down and peck your cheek.

“Morning,” he grumbles to Mary and reaches for the coffee pot.

“Oh, here!” you cheer, extending out the cup Mary had just poured for you.

Billy takes it, smiling at you, “Thanks, darlin. Care to join me?”

“You haven’t quit smoking?” Mary gives you a look of shock.

Shamefully, you shake your head. You were going to schedule an appointment today for the doctors and figured you’d ask him about your options for that. You’d been smoking since you were thirteen and weren’t sure if you could quit and Billy wasn’t going to anytime soon so you’d always have the temptation.

“They’re Lights,” Billy offers, “It’s something.”

Again, your heart swells. It’s a small thing but you love how he defends you at any opportunity. Mary gives you both a disappointed look as you follow Billy out to the backyard. He lights the cigarette and takes a long drag before handing it to you.

“We can share,” he says, “At least you’re cutting back.”

You nod and lean your shoulder into his, “Thank you. I feel like you’re the only person who gets me.”

He kisses your temple but doesn’t say anything. You’d like to think you’re the only person who gets him. Billy’s still not good at talking about his feelings. He shows you how he feels through touch, and maybe that’s enough. For now, at least. If you’re gonna start a family with him, you’d like that to change.

He takes another long drag from the cigarette and speaks up, “I’ve got to get my things today. If there is anything left. You willing to make that trip with me when I get back?”

You think that means he feels safe with you. With a soft smile, you tell him yes. You know you two have to tell Neil that you’re pregnant, or at least, you think you should. See, Billy hadn’t told you about his dad finding the Polaroids of you and you still thought that Neil liked you, so you think maybe he’ll be excited that you’re pregnant. Billy knows better and is dreading telling his dad. In fact, he doesn’t really want to tell him, doesn’t want Neil to be a grandfather at all. He knows Neil will try to control his kid since he can no longer control Billy.

“Are you excited to work for my dad?” you ask.

Billy nods, he genuinely is. He likes working on cars, figures it’ll pay enough for you guys to find an apartment in a few months. He is thinking about marriage, but he’s afraid of it. Having a child together isn’t enough to make sure either of you stay, he’s learned that. He’s also worried you might run off into another man’s arms at the first sign of trouble. It’s a fear he can’t shake.

“Yeah. You looking for jobs today?” he asks as he stumps the cigarette out in the ashtray.

Sighing, you shrug. You hadn’t planned for that but you know you should. Billy shouldn’t have to have all the financial responsibility but you had no idea what you would do. Working at your dads shop could easily turn into a career but you didn’t have that luxury. Your options were limited with only being able to work until the baby was born.

“I suppose I should,” you tell him as he stands and helps you up.

-

You pick up the phone and dial a number you’ve had memorized since grade school but you don’t remember the last time you called it.

“Hello?” Eddie’s voice rings through.

“Hi,” you say meekly.

Eddie scoffs, “You remembered I exist.”

You lay on your mattress, looking up at the ceiling as guilt drips into your system. Billy kept you so distracted from everyone and then when you were broken up shortly, Steve took up most your time. Eddie wasn’t supportive of you and Billy and selfishly, you decided Billy was most important. He still was, even more so now that you were carrying his child but you and Eddie had so much history that it would be cruel to never talk to him again.

“I’m sorry… I haven’t been fair to you,” you say softly.

“I expected you to call when I heard Billy dumped your ass but you never did,” Eddie replies, “Guess you couldn’t bear to hear an ‘I told you so’.”

“We got back together,” you mumble, “But I should’ve called. I don’t want to have to chose between the two of you.”

“Then don’t.”

“Eddie, you’re the one who made me feel like I had to in the first place,” you explain, “Billy has no issues with you.”

He’s silent and your skin crawls. You didn’t want to lose him but you understood if Eddie wanted nothing to do with you.

“I just don’t want to have to deal with it,” he says finally, “If you guys are constantly breaking up and getting back together, I’m never gonna come around to the idea of him.”

“I don’t see that happening,” you reveal, “He’s moving in and I’m pregnant, so…”

“You’re what?” Eddie’s voice sounds shocked.

“Yeah. I’m having Billy Hargrove’s baby.”

“Jesus Christ,” he exhaled, “I tell you what, I didn’t see that one happening.”

“Yeah, we didn’t either,” you chuckle.

“And he didn’t run away? He’s moving in with you? Are you guys engaged or something?”

“No! Well, not yet. I don’t know if he wants to get married,” you admit, shyly.

Eddie laughs, “He’s moving in with you and you guys are having a baby. Why the hell would he skip marrying you?”

“I don’t know. Marriage is like a big deal, a big commitment,” you say and Eddie’s laughing harder, you picture him doubling over from it.

“Why are you laughing?” you pout, feeling like you’re missing out on some joke.

Once his breathing calms down, he starts, “He’s all fine and dandy knocking you up and you’re scared he can’t commit.”

Eddie starts laughing again and you really don’t see why it’s hard to believe. You and Billy both know that kids and marriage don’t keep people together. Eddie should know that too, but here he is laughing hysterically.

“It’s not funny,” you whine and finally, he sighs.

“You’re right,” he deadpans, “it’s stupid. So I have Hellfire tonight but if you’re not busy later this week, we should hang out.”

“Can I bring Billy?” you ask, twirling the phone chord around your finger.

Another sigh and he says, “Yeah… guess I should get to know him if he’s gonna be the dad of my god child.”

You’re heart swells, but you deep down knew Eddie would forgive you. You guys were practically family.

-

Dale holds out the light blue uniform shirt to Billy, tells him they can get him an embroidered patch soon and Billy thanks him. Having a name on the shirt was a privilege at the shop in San Diego and Billy never earned it. At your dads shop, it was something everyone typically got from the first day. He wanted his employees to feel important, like they belonged on a team.

Billy pulls the shirt over his white tank top and starts buttoning it up, eyes scanning over your dads office. It’s in disarray. Tools, papers and empty paper coffee cups placed sporadically. On his desk, is a photo of you and your brother. Billy picks it up and looks closer. He suspects it’s from a past trip to Florida because your hair is shorter.

“You’ll have to come out with us from now on,” Dale says.

“What? Sorry,” he places the frame back on the desk.

“Florida. For Christmas, you’ll have to come with us,” your dad explains and Billy feels weird but not in a bad way. Christmas wasn’t ever a special holiday since his mom left. In fact, they didn’t really even celebrate it before his dad met Susan. The only thing he’d looked forward to was a card from his grandparents. However, you talked about Christmas excitedly, you’d told Billy it was your third favorite; after Halloween and Thanksgiving of course. It must be that it was fun in Florida, that holidays with your family weren’t as empty or angry as the ones Billy was used to.

“Yeah,” he says, smiling at the thought, “Wonder what the surfs like down there.”

Your dad laughs, “The waters a lot choppier than California but I imagine you’ll have fun.” He gestures to the door, “Let me give you a tour, real quick.”

Billy listens closely as your dad explains the routine of the shop and what Billy’s primary responsibilities will be before sending him in with Darla from accounting and Billy recognizes the name when your dad says it. He walks into the little office and is met with a member of his fan club, one of the housewives that would hang out around the pool.

“Billy!” she smiles wide, “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, hi,” he says as he walks up to her desk.

She keeps looking over Billy’s shoulder, causing him to turn and look.

“Oh, don’t worry,” she says, “We’re alone.”

He looks back at her with his brows furrowed. Alone? he thinks and his eyes dart down to the worn romance novel sitting on her desk. She stands and he shakes his head, “Oh, no.”

“No?” she looks disappointed.

Billy chuckles, “Dale just hired me, he sent me in here so I could fill out paperwork.”

Her disappointment evolves back into excitement, “You’re working here now?”

“Yep!” he chirps as he sits at the plastic chair across from her desk. “Saving for the baby and all.”

“Baby?” she asks and Billy revels in the defeated tone.

“Yeah, that’s why Dale’s giving me the job. His daughter and I are having a baby,” he puts his elbow on his knees and leans forward.

“Congratulations,” she says as she slams a clipboard on the desk. “Just fill this out quickly and I’ll have you in the books.”

“Awesome,” he grabs it, “Thanks.”

-

Billy takes the long way home, chain-smoking and listening to an entire cassette even though it’s typically a fifteen minute drive from the shop to home. He just needs to clear his head and his favorite way to do so is to take the road that stretches all around Hawkins and back. It’s mostly fields and farms, but it’ll take him right where he’s needs to go and he likes that it’s empty roads. He figures his alone time will be limited from here on out.

When he finally gets home, you’re voicing concerns. They’re in the form of questions, he knows you were worried but he can’t help but feel a bit suffocated. He knows these feelings are because of his looming fear of seeing his dad but he can’t help but lash out.

“I just took a drive,” he bites, “Can you chill out? It’s not even late.”

You stare back up at him, a little stunned but you press your palm on his chest and rub in circles, “I’m sorry.”

Billy doesn’t expect that reaction and his first response is to push you away, but that’s Neil getting in his head. He sighs and wraps his arms around you, pulling you to his chest and tucking his face into your neck.

“No, I’m sorry,” he mumbles into your hair, “Just not looking forward to going over there.”

Your hands circle around his waist and you squeeze him, “I’ll be with you. We’ll make it quick, just grab as much as we can and leave.”

He pulls back and hooks his finger under your chin, tilting your head back as he leans in to press his lips to yours. It’s chaste but lets you know he trusts you. And anytime his lips are on you, it heats up your thighs and leaves you a little breathless.

“Shall we get it over with then?” Billy grumbles though his tone suggests he really doesn’t want to.

You lace your fingers and pull him out the door. He allows you to lead him across the street and then the two of you just stand at the door. Billy feels as if he has to knock, like he hasn’t just spent a little less than a year living in this house. His knuckles tap against the wood as he prays Max answers the door. She doesn’t.

“It’s about damn time,” Neil spews as he stares at Billy, eyes dark. He eyes dart to you and then back to his son, “Needed your safety blanket, did ya?”

Your blood boils so you squeeze Billy’s hand tighter, “We’re just here to get some of his stuff.”

You figure you’ll do the talking, maybe make this a little easier. Neil opens the door wide, stepping back and you can see Susan peeking her head out of the kitchen. Billy tugs you inside, making a beeline for his bedroom door. Upon opening it, Billy sees that Neil has sold all his stuff and all that’s left is his stereo system and two packed boxes on the floor. His face heats up, he wants to scream at his dad but it’s a losing battle. He knows what Neil will say. He bought everything that was in there. Billy knows because the stereo is still there, it was the first thing Billy bought when he got his first ever paycheck.

He heaves a sigh and then looks over to you, “Can you manage the two boxes? It won’t hurt the… ya know.”

“Billy, I’m like maybe a few weeks along, it’s a little tadpole in there,” you say and then your eyes widen, realizing that you’ve just admitted you were pregnant.

You turn around to see Neil standing in the doorway, looking dumbfounded.

“Fuck,” Billy curses, bringing his hand to rub his brow.

“What was that?” Neil asks, stepping into the room.

Billy heaves a sigh and turns to his dad, “Nothing.”

“Nothing?” he scoffs, “Sounded to me like your little girlfriend just said she’s pregnant.”

“Pregnant?” Susan’s voice rings through the hall and she hurries to stand in the doorway.

Billy doesn’t say anything, he just starts stacking the speakers onto the cassette deck.

“You really fucked up,” Neil laughs sinisterly, the sound startling you and causing bile to rise up your throat. You swallow it down and go to grab the boxes but Neil stops you, “I’ll get the boxes. You shouldn’t be doing any heavy lifting.”

“No, it’s fine,” you try but he’s already picking them up with ease and heading for the door.

“Shit,” Billy says, grabbing the stereo and following after his dad.

You eye Susan curiously before walking out behind your boyfriend. Neil’s already at your doorstep when you get outside and Billy’s quickly shuffling across the street after him.

“Dad,” he calls out.

Neil bangs on the door and your dad opens it. Your hearts in your chest as you run after them. You have no idea what Neil’s plan is but you’re scared he’s gonna deck your dad right in the face.

“Neil,” your dad says, opening the door wider to let him in. You and Billy right behind him.

“Go ahead and just set those down anywhere,” Mary says to him, perched over the kitchen counter.

You shut the door behind you, letting out the breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding.

“Dad,” Billy pleads again, but nothing follows. He doesn’t know what he’s asking Neil not to do.

“So my sons knocked your daughter up, has he?” Neil says after dropping the boxes on the floor.

This is all your fault. The guilt rises in your throat and threatens to pour out, you reach to Billy for comfort once he’s set the stereo down.

“It would appear so,” your dad says, leaning against the kitchen table as he looks to Neil casually.

“And you didn’t kill him?” Neil responds, crossing his arms.

Your dad shrugs, “I like the kid.”

Neil chuckles, but it doesn’t sound happy, like he can’t fathom anyone liking his son. He shakes his head, seems defeated and you and Billy both admire your dad.

“Is that all, then?” your dad asks, crossing his arms.

“Well what’s the plan then? When are you getting married?” Neil asks, turning to his son now.

Billy clears his throat and you notice he starts tapping his foot, “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Neil scoffs, “Well, boy, you better figure it out. You don’t want to marry her? You should’ve thought that before you did something so damn irresponsible.”

The words sting your chest and your dad moves in front of Billy, physically shielding him from Neil.

“Thanks for stopping by,” your dad says, “We’ll make sure to let you know the plan.”

Billy’s shocked when his dad retreats, through all the years of abuse, he’s never seen his dad give up on a fight. He takes a deep breath when the door slams. Most of all, though, he’s embarrassed. Without a word, he picks the stereo up and lugs it into your room.

“Thank you, dad…” you hug your father, unable to truly express your gratitude.

“Let Billy know that I didn’t only do that for you, I did it for him,” your dad says, a solemn smile on his face.

You nod, squeezing him once more before trailing to your room to see Billy still holding the stereo. He has no idea where to put it, you have too much stuff. You put your hand on his shoulder, “I’ll give mine to my brother. Yours is better anyways.”

Billy heaves a sigh, remaining silent as he watches you unplug your stereo and gather the speakers. You leave to put it in your brothers room, saying a quiet hello to him when he peers up at you from his book.

“Aw, really?” he sets the book down and sits up.

You place it on his dresser, “Yeah, Billy’s is better than this one.”

“Thanks, sis,” he says, springing up from his bed, “I don’t have any cassettes.”

“I’ll give you some,” you offer, placing your hands on your hips as you look at him.

“Was that his dad?” he asks, biting his nail.

You slap his hand from his mouth, not wanting him to form the habit, “Yeah.”

“Are you really having a baby?” he asks, a tilt of his head.

You nod, giggling as you ruffle up his hair, “Yeah, you’re gonna be an uncle.”

He grins up at you, “I hope it’s a boy.”

“Billy does too,” you reply, “I hope it’s a girl.”

“Typical,” your brother says, poking at the buttons on the stereo set.

You roll your eyes and head back to your room, noticing Billy’s set up the stereo but he’s no longer in the room. You peer curiously out the door to see him walking up to you with the boxes in his hands. He sets them on the floor and sits in front of them, opening the first up to inspect what Neil wanted him to keep. To his surprise, it’s all the things he's kept of his mothers. His heart aches, wanting so desperately to tell her she’s going to be a grandmother, wanting to tell her everything that’s happened since she left.

“He didn’t throw any of it away,” Billy mumbles in disbelief.

“Is it your moms stuff?” you ask, as you sit beside him.

He hands you a photo, it’s of an infant Billy being held by a beautiful blonde lady. You’d never seen any photos of Billy as a baby.

“Huh,” you say, “So our kids gonna be this cute.”

Billy shoves you playfully, “With any luck, it’ll only have my genes.”

You giggle, happy when this side of Billy makes a resurgence. “I’m hoping and praying.”

He hands you another photo, one of when he’s roughly a year old and he’s standing in front of his mom while holding onto her hands. He’s learning how to walk. You scan over it, smiling back at his mom. “She’s so pretty,” you muse, “You look like her.”

You swear he blushes, “Yeah, she was beautiful.”

He continues pulling the items out, showing you every photo and explaining every random item. Billy visibly relaxes, an easy smile plastered on his face and he’s never looked prettier. You kiss his face, starting at his jaw and all the way up to his hairline.

“Oh! Wait!” You spring up and barrel out of the room, only to return with an empty photo album. You sit back down and hand it to him, “Here, you can put them in here.”

He takes it gratefully and gradually, the two of you fill the photo album. Billy then moves onto the second box. It’s his jewelry and a few clothing items but at the bottom of it, his dirty magazines sit. Billy laughs, pulling them out.

“Why the hell didn’t he just throw these away?”

“Who is he to become between a man and his porn collection?” you tease, pulling the first Penthouse magazine from him.

You start flipping through it, seeing in your peripheral that Billy’s watching you with an amused expression. After flipping a page, Polaroids fall into your lap. You drop the magazine and gather up the photos, blushing when you see they’re of you and Billy. Some raunchier than others.

“You kept these?” you ask, softly.

“How do you think I got through those weeks without ya?” he nudges your shoulder.

You look at him, mouth agape. You’re extremely flattered at the thought of Billy pleasuring himself to photos of you. Granted, half of these, his dick is inside of you but still.

“You jacked off to these?” you ask, lowering your voice.

“Oh, yeah,” he says, grabbing them from your hand and shuffling through them. “This one’s my favorite,” he hands you a Polaroid, it’s one of the day at the lake.

You’re embarrassed as you look down at your body, riding Billy on a towel with your swimsuit top not covering your breasts but pulled to the sides. Then you tilt your head, looking at where your bodies meet and you can see just the tiniest inch of his cock. It is a hot photo and you remember how turned on you got when Billy reached for the camera.

Suddenly, you feel his lips on your neck and then his tongue, wet and hot against your sensitive flesh. You moan softly at the feeling, tilting your head even more to give him access while you continue to look at the photo. He reaches into your pants, cupping you over your underwear and your breath hitches in your throat. He gently moves his fingers, teasing the wetness out of you. The photo flutters out of your grip.

“You like it, too,” he notes, feeling you soak through the thin cotton.

“Uh huh,” you moan, awkwardly spreading your thighs and feeling as the magazines and photos fall from your lap onto the floor.

His hand rises a bit, just to snake into your underwear and his fingertips drag up through folds and stop at your clit. He sucks on your neck, rubbing languid circles against your sensitive bud. You lean back, hands pressing on the floor behind you to keep you upright. Billy’s fingers feel like magic, always do. You ache for him, want to feel him all over. You get frustrated sometimes, wanting him closer even if he’s as close as he can physically be.

“Billy,” you whimper, your arms shaking as you try to hold yourself up but when he slides two fingers inside you, you collapse onto your back and kick your feet out to spread your legs further.

He chuckles, leaning down to kiss your lips softly. He pulls away too quickly, so you cling onto his shirt and pull him back down, feeling his smile into the kiss. You lick against his teeth, still pulling at his shirt. He gives you what you want, licking into your mouth and curling his fingers inside you. Your back arches off the ground, moaning into his mouth. He groans back, his fingers faltering when you reach over to feel his cock straining against his jeans. You’re eager, unbuttoning his jeans and trying to claw them down, but with the way he’s positioned you can’t. He lifts his bum up and helps shove them to his thighs with his free hand. Your fingers wrap around his cock as soon as it’s free, stroking him quickly. He laughs against your mouth.

“Slow down,” he mumbles and you lick his teeth again, groaning in protest but you still listen.

You can hear his breathing and the slick sound of his fingers pumping in and out of your soaking pussy. You swipe your thumb against his tip, feeling his precum bubbling out and you spread it around which earns you a guttural groan from the blonde. You lift your other hand and push him back, leaning yourself over to take him in your mouth. You have to taste. Swirling your tongue around his pulsing head, your hand strokes whatever’s not in your mouth. Billy leans his head back, biting his lip to stifle his moans. If only he’d turned on the stereo when he plugged it in.

Billy’s pulling his hand away only to snake both of them into your hair, propping himself on his knees and pushing you further down on his cock. You’d be pissed about the loss but his pursuit of his own pleasure turns you on more. You position yourself better in front of him, grabbing onto his thighs while you breath through your nose as you take him into your mouth as deep as you can. You bob your head, by the aid of Billy’s grip on your hair as he guides you up and down. You look up to see his eyes meeting yours, mouth slightly agape and his eyes glassy. You can’t help but gag as he reaches the back of your throat and he moans, voice hoarse and just a tad whiny. It makes you squirm, feeling slick dripping down your thighs.

“Fuck,” he whines, as you pull off him with a loud pop, drool stringing between your lips and the head of his cock.

You stick your tongue out, eyes wide up at him and he wraps his fingers around his cock as he slaps it against your tongue. Your lips tug up before you wrap them around his head again, sucking hard and then pulling off again. Billy’s pushing you down into your back, then. He rips your leggings and panties off before following suit with your top and bra. As he’s lining himself up with your center, you start unbuttoning his work shirt and pushing it off his shoulders, the sleeves catching at his elbows. He gets the hint, smiling when he pulls it off and then grabs the hem of his tank top, bringing it over his head and tossing it aside. He presses his palm against your chest, easing you back down. He grabs his dick again and presses his tip through your folds, shaking it against your clit. You gasp, hands squeezing your own breasts.

“Give it to me, Billy,” you beg, “please.”

He smirks and then plunges his cock into you. It stings slightly as he bottoms out, his hand coming up to dig his fingers into your thigh. Your eyes flutter shut and he brings his other hand to grab your jaw.

“Look at me,” he orders and you obey, eyelids flying open to see his gorgeous, flushed face looking back at you.

Billy shoves his fingers in your mouth and you suck on them lazily, moaning around them as he rocks his hips against you. He pumps in and out of you, deep and slow as his thumb digs into your cheek. It’s crazy, with his fingers shoved in your mouth and his cock balls deep in you, all you can think is how fucking much you love him. How you can’t live without him. How you never want to go a day without this.

“Closer,” you mouth around his fingers.

He pulls them out and looks down at you curiously, slowing his thrusts.

“Closer, want you closer,” you plead.

Billy smiles, leaning down and wrapping his arms around you before pulling you up, holding you against his chest. Your arms circle his neck, holding him close while he moves his hips quicker again. You moan softly against his ear, clinging onto him for dear life. His arms tighten around you and you’re thankful for all the working out he does. He’s able to press against your g-spot with every thrust as this angle and you’re quickly coming undone around him. In attempt to help, you writhe against him. His labored breathing followed by small, high pitched moans in your ear pushes you along. You scratch at his upper back, letting him know you’re close and he starts pounding up into you harder. It snaps, the build up of your orgasm falling over the edge and you shake against him, biting his shoulder to quiet the cry you let out.

Billy’s leaning down, resting you on your back and relentlessly thrusting into you. You scratch all the way down his back, overwhelmed with pleasure as you ride out your climax. He freezes, eyes squeezing shut and gritting his teeth as he releases inside of you. You hold onto his face, wrapping your legs around his waist and grinding your hips up against him. He whimpers, hands grabbing onto your hips to pin you down. He collapses his weight on top of you and it’s the most comfortable feeling in the world. You squeeze him in your arms and pepper his neck with kisses.

He finally lifts himself up to his elbows and gazes down at you, curls sticking to his face with sweat. He looks ethereal, always does but more so now than ever.

“I love you,” he whispers, caressing your face.

“I love you, Billy.”

-

Three months of saving and he’s about to burn through it in an instant. Billy peers down at the ring, reading the engraving and second guessing himself. Not about proposing, but about the words he’s chosen.

Forever, Snoopy.

He knows you’ll get it but it feels cheesy and he’s a bit uncomfortable with that side of him showing. He knows he shouldn’t feel embarrassed around you. Besides, girls like that kind of mushy, romantic stuff. Billy has a hard time with being perceived as anything other than tough and cool so he tells himself you’ll think the ring is cool and that it was very cool of him to reference how you met and totally not tacky and cheesy.

It burns a hole in his pocket as he walks into the restaurant, seeing you sitting there with your dad, brother and Mary and wonders if proposing in such a public setting is a bad idea. Oh, God, what if you say no?

He feels his lunch threaten to make a reappearance and he redirects his path to the bathroom. He locks the door behind him and looks at himself in the mirror. He wore his best shirt, the maroon one and he’s only buttoned the last two buttons. He shimmies out of his leather jacket, suddenly feeling too hot. He rests it on the counter and then turns the cold water on. He splashes it on his face and then takes a deep breath. Why would you say no? There’s no possible timeline in which you say no to marrying him.

Hell, he’d asked your dad this morning and if he doubted your acceptance he would’ve said something like ‘Sure, Billy, spend all of the tiny bit you’ve saved to move out of my house to get rejected by my daughter’ instead of “Yes, of course you have my blessing.”

Billy takes a deep breath and exits the bathroom, only to turn around and retrieve his jacket. Nerves be damned, he was gonna marry you. He arrives to the table and you stand to greet him, his eyes darting to the tiny baby bump more obvious than it’s ever been in the tight dress you’re wearing. He kisses you, hand pressing to your hip as he does so.

“Hi, baby,” you say to him with those dreamy eyes.

“Hi,” he coos back, his nerves subsiding the second your eyes meet. He forgets why he was nervous in the first place. “Sorry, I'm late,” he apologizes to you and then your family, as he sits down.

Your dad gives him a knowing smile and it makes Billy even more nervous. He’s in his own head during the whole dinner, missing questions directed at him. You reach over and squeeze his bicep, asking if he’s alright and Billy just nods.

Then he tells himself he’s got nothing to worry about and maybe right now isn’t the right time to propose. He ignores your dads pointed looks and when you excuse yourself to restroom Billy announces to the table, “I am going to propose just not here.”

“You nervous?” Dale chuckles, sipping his wine.

Billy blushes, “I just… I don’t know, feel like we should be alone.”

Mary reaches in her bag and pulls out the Polaroid camera, “Then you have to take the photo.”

“I can’t do both at the same time,” Billy explains, a little exasperated.

Mary grins, “Why don’t you do it when she gets back? As she walks up, get down on one knee.”

Billy’s eyes widen, thinking about what a spectacle that would be, “God, no. I want to do it when we’re alone.”

“It’s their story, Mary,” your dad says, “Let them write it.”

“Fine,” she grumbles and reaches for her wine.

“I’ll ask for you if you’re scared,” your brother offers Billy earnestly.

Billy pats his back, “Thanks, kid but I’ve got to do this myself.”

You return to the table and raise an eyebrow as they all turn to Billy expectantly, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing!” Billy smiles too wide at you.

And he doesn’t ask, he thinks about it when you’re cuddling before bed that night but he can’t bring himself to do it. He presses kisses against the back of your neck

“You know I love you, right?” he mumbles, almost too quiet for you to hear.

You lean your head back, awkwardly angling your lips to his. He squeezes your waist and kisses back deeply.

“I love you, too Billy. Why are you acting weird?” you turn around to look into his eyes.

“I’m not acting weird,” he argues, but his cheeks feel hot.

“Are you trying to ask for a blow job?” you tease, pushing his hair back.

“I mean…” he laughs, “If you’re offering, I’ll accept.”

“Go to bed,” you giggle and tuck your head in his shoulder.

He’ll ask in the morning, he decides.

[alexendria-rose]

~Dance with me~

Sherlock Holmes X Reader

Y/n watched as Sherlock Holmes played the violin so beautifully and elegantly for his closest friends. Her eyes completely focused on him. The way he felt the music beneath his fingers and soul made her smile in awe. His eyes open darting towards her giving her a small smile that was only for her, because as soon as his gaze wasn’t on her; his face went natural once again and she cherished that. Y/n was the person that has been by his side as long as John has. She was the person that would tag alone cases with him, the person that would grab him milk because he always forgot to when John asked and when she thought he died she was constantly wishing it was all fake, that it wasn’t real; finding out she was right made her open her eyes about how she felt about Sherlock. The way they would sit and talk about different cases and how to solve them at 1AM while they drunk tea, the way Sherlock made sure he wouldn’t let his legs go so fast so she could keep up. It was always Sherlock and Y/n and as she stared at the way he looked at Mary and John, she knew she wasn’t stoic and distant and cold. He was human, more human than anyone she’s ever met. She was in love with her best friend, the man who was content in being alone so he says.

Sherlock finishes the song, John dipping Mary giving his now wife a chaste kiss on her lips. Y/n grins clapping along with the crowd. She watched as Sherlock walks up to the two smiling and laughing with the newlywed couple. They soon disperse, as Mary and John continue to dance and talk to their families and friends. Sherlock looked around the room scanning for the person who mattered the most to him, his eyes immediately finding her a small smile playing on his lips about to take the steps to go towards her, realizing someone already got there first.

Y/n eyes were locked on Sherlock when Greg Lestrade comes up slurring his words.

“Oh bloody hell Greg how much have you had to drink?” She laughs putting a hand on his shoulder to keep him steady.

“Maybe a bit too much?” He groans leaning against the wall they were beside. Y/n rolls her eyes turning to head to look back at Sherlock noticing his presence was not there. She crinkles her eyebrows giving her glass to Greg.

“I have to go, don’t kill yourself with alcohol please.” She mumbles hearing Greg scoff before leaving her spot looking around the dance floor to see if she could spot Sherlock. She moves her head towards the exit noticing the curly mop of hair leaving the building. She follows swiftly behind him making her way out of the crowed room.

“Where are you going?” She says as soon as they’re outside. Sherlock whips his head around his coat in his arm as well as his scarf. He notices her confused expression, but her sad one as well.

“Weddings aren’t my thing.” He mumbles softly, keeping to himself the exact reason he was leaving. Because he knew he was going to end up alone anyways.

“I wouldve left with you.” She whispered shyly walking her way closer to him.

“I didn’t want you to leave your fun because of me.” He mumbles turning his face away from her his jaw flexing slightly.

“I was waiting for you.” She admitted to him placing a hand on his arm. “You played amazing tonight,” Sherlock glances at the way she rests her hand on his arm.

“You were?” He questions. She just smiles softly at him.

“I remember the time you told me that you always loved dancing as a child.” She giggled remembering the way he told her like it was a secret. “I wanted to watch you dance and enjoy your time. I know why you’re pushing away.” Sherlock laughs softly at her memory but soon as she mentioned him pushing away his face snapped away from hers.

“I’m not pushing anyone away-“

“Sherlock, you’re afraid of change.” She whispered softly keeping her hand placed on his arm. “You’re scared that it’s not just going to be the four of us chasing you around all the time.” Sherlock looks into her eyes trying to read her wondering why she was so soft spoken with him, why she’s never been offended at the way he was so blunt and honest.

“It may not always be the four of us, but I will always be here for you Sherlock.”

“Why are you?” He moves himself closer furrowing his eyebrows. “Why are you always here for me.” Y/n clears her throat shaking her head.

“It doesn’t matte-“

“It does, please tell me. I’ve been trying to deduce that for years and for the life of me. I can’t figure it out.” He steps closer to her noticing the way her breathing became more uneven, and her eyes dilating.

“Because I care about you.”

“It’s not just that.” He mumbles tilting his head grabbing her wrist to feel her pulse. “Your pulse is abnormal, your eyes are dilated…” he freezes his eyes lifting up from her wrist to her eyes. “Love?”

Y/n eyes widen moving her wrist away from his grasp.

“Sherlock it’s fine I’ve already come to terms with all of it.” She waves her hands to stop this conversation going any further, not wanting to hear that love is a defect, or even worse the rejection that he will never ever look at her that way. Instead he just chuckles, running his hand through his hair, setting his stuff down on the ledge of the fountain.

“Dance with me.” He says lifting his hand out to her. She looks at him with a confused look before taking a hold of his hand. He pulls her hand bringing him close to his chest starting to slow dance with her. She squeals as he brings her to his chest looking at him with flustered cheeks. “Do you know the reason why I always want you near me?” He asks his feet moving swiftly but slowly keeping her in her pace.

“Because I’m useful?” She laughs softly looking up at him noticing his eyes soften as he looks down at her.

“Well yes, you are one of the most intelligent people I have ever met but no.” He smirks softly their bodies moving gracefully together. “Because you are the one person who doesn’t see me as a robot, or just a detective, or just someone who’s impressed by me.” He pauses turning his face away from her. “You’re someone I want to spend my time with, someone I always think about whether I want to or not.” She bites her lip softly watching his face turn valnerable and completely in tune with her. “I’ve always said that love was a weakness, and now I know that isn’t the case because of you.” Her heart quickens at his words.

“But that would mean-“

“I love you, all I want to do is protect and hold you. You’re all I think about, so yes tonight scared me because I cannot bare the thought of things changing between us. I’m scared of losing you.” His gaze focusing on hers not noticing there dancing has stopped as his focus was on her and only her.

“I love you too.” She whispers softly and delicately afraid this moment would just end. He chuckles deeply lifting her chin up with his index finger.

“You have my heart Y/n.” He mumbles leaning forward to place a soft kiss on her lips. She sighs softly as there lips touch. It was quick but it was full of passion and love knowing this won’t be their last kiss, that it was just the beginning.

[this-sapphic-paradise]

Modern AU with show!Rhaenyra and book!Alicent, where Rhaenyra lost her mother when she was 14. She’s 15 when her father marries 24-year-old Alicent, who was his personal assistant before they got married.

This was some of the back story I was thinking of, but you can ignore it if you wanted to do something else:

Alicent had admired Viserys since she became his PA, for being much more kind and considerate of the people around him than she’d expected from the CEO of a multibillion dollar company. When she learned that his beloved wife had past she felt for him, remembering the grief of losing her mother not too long ago. So she comforted him, stayed late and talked with him, made sure he ate and went home early enough to get some rest. After about six months he kissed her. She was shocked and a bit uncomfortable, but she made herself go along with it because she knew him to be a good man and if she had to be in a relationship with a man anyway then she could certainly do worse. Plus this would surely please her hard-to-please father.

Viserys married Alicent because she was good to him and he believed she’d be a good stepmother to Rhaenyra. His relationship with his daughter had been somewhat distant even before Aemma passed, but since then it had only gotten worse. He didn’t know what to do with a teenage daughter, so he hoped having another woman in the house would make things easier.

Rhaenyra used to like her father’s personal assistant (maybe even had a tiny crush on her). That all changed when Viserys married her. Rhaenyra assumed her stepmother was just a gold digger who’d preyed on her father while he was grieving and vulnerable. Then, after a few years of college/university and staying away during the summers, her father forces her to come home and intern at his company before her senior year or she’ll be cut off. That’s when Rhaenyra‘s mind started to change about Alicent. She wasn’t sure if it was a more recent development in the marriage or if it was something that had always been there and she was only now able to see it after spending time away from home, but Alicent was miserable.

Not sure if any of the kids exist here.

Part 1 - First encounter

"Sir, your three o'clock has canc--- Oh. I'm sorry." Alicent cut herself off, stopping dead on her tracks when she finally noticed that her boss wasn't in his office, and that instead there was a teenager sitting on his chair. "I thought---"

"My father is out on the balcony on a phone call." The girl interrupted, eyeing Alicent from head to toe.

"You must be Rhaenyra, then." Alicent said, smiling charmingly as she closed the distance between them and offered her hand in greeting. "I'm---"

"Alicent Hightower." Rhaenyra cut her off again, accepting the offered hand before continuing, "My father's young, and, dare I say, very beautiful personal assistant."

If Alicent was taken aback by the brazen words, she did not show it. Keeping her polite smile, she simply said, "I hope those aren't the only things I'm known for."

Rhaenyra grinned and let go of Alicent’s hand. "Please," she motioned to the chair across from her, "My father won't take long."

Accepting the offer, Alicent sat and asked so no awkward silence could settle between them, "How old are you?"

"Fourteen. You?"

"Twenty-three. And what brings you here today? I've been your father's PA for over a year and I had never seen you at the office before."

Rhaenyra shrugged. "Got suspended from school and this is my punishment."

Alicent raised a brow. "What happened??"

Smirking, Rhaenyra leaned over the desk on her elbows and replied, "Wouldn't you like to know..."

The girl was a flirt and coupled with her unique beauty, Alicent was sure Rhaenyra was used to getting everything she wanted.

Crossing her legs to show them off, Alicent met Rhaenyra with a smirk of her own and said, "If I didn't, I wouldn't have asked, would I?"

As soon as Alicent had crossed her legs, Rhaenyra couldn't help but let her eyes trail over them. It was only when Alicent spoke that she was brought back to reality.

"Hm..." The girl cleared her throat and met Alicent’s eyes again. "I punched a guy and broke his nose."

"What did he do to deserve that?"

"He didn't take no for an answer after I turned down going out with him for the thousandth time."

Alicent leaned closer to Rhaenyra and whispered to her just as Viserys was re-entering the room, "Then it was well deserved." Alicent winked, making Rhaenyra smile brightly.

[sunlightmurdock]

I want to know more about Beau x sunshine!reader, do you have any plans to write about it?

here’s some of what I wrote for it before, I don’t really have too many plans for finishing or posting it

…

“Penny for your thoughts?”

When Beau looks up, seven double measures of whiskey deep, he isn’t pleased to find a bubbly girl and her silly little grin looking back at him. In fact, he immediately scowls, unimpressed.

If this is your attempt at being cute, he isn’t having it. Luckily, you aren’t even trying yet. Just being friendly.

You shoot a glance across at your co-worker, Beth. She rolls her eyes at the miserable bastard on the other side of the bar and turns to give her attention to the patrons in here that might actually give her a tip at the end of this.

He’s been sitting there for a good few hours now. Since before your shift began at four, anyway. You give a small shrug and turn your back on him.

Beau glances up once more. He takes his time to look now that you’re not grinning back at him. When he was younger, he would’ve gone for you. You’re dressed kind of like she used to.

Dylan was saying something the other day about the early two-thousands being back in style, but Beau tends not to listen to his eleven-year old son’s fashion advice. It’s hard to take the kid who only just figured out that maybe wearing his jeans a size too big doesn’t make people think he’s bigger than he is seriously.

Thinking of Dylan snaps Beau quickly back to reality. He peels his eyes away from your short shorts and tank top, instead opting to look at his glass. He’s not sure how old you are, but probably not old enough to be dating a man with an eleven-year old son and a fifteen-year marriage that just went down the drain.

Whilst his eyes are on his almost empty glass, he can’t help but glance down at his wedding band. He’s an idiot for still wearing it. She hasn’t worn it since she told him she was leaving, and that was months ago.

He’s an idiot for thinking that this would all blow over and that she would change her mind.

Beau lifts his glass and finishes the rest, then slams the glass down a little too loudly on the bar. He exhales deeply and pinches the bridge of his nose.

You turn your head slowly as you close the cash register, staring at the clearly devastated man at the end of the bar. You hand the customer their change and find yourself wandering back to him.

“How ‘bout a dollar for your thoughts?”

Beau opens his eyes slowly, staring back at you, completely unimpressed. He’s heartbroken, and a girl like you isn’t going to want to hear about this mess.

“‘Cause yours seem pretty juicy, that’s all,” You shrug playfully, leaning onto the bar with your elbows and smiling across at him. He stares back at you, you realise that a dollar isn’t going to cut it. “Fine, fine — a free drink and you’ll spill?”

Beau’s thick brows furrow slightly. For one, he’s confused on what a pretty, young girl is doing bothering someone his age, and for two — “How come you’re so interested?”

“It’ll make my shift go faster. Plus, my good friend over there and I have a bet going as to whether or not you’re single. She hasn’t noticed the wedding ring yet and once you open up, I’m about to win twenty bucks.”

Beau rolls his eyes. The service in this place has been kind of slow this afternoon. You girls have been busy gossiping away and pissing him off without meaning to. He figures that if he just tells you the half of it, he’ll get that next drink a little bit faster.

He glances down at his wedding ring and toys with it. Finally, he scoffs and pushes his empty glass towards you.

“You owe her a twenty, actually.”

You furrow your brows, but make good on that promise of a free drink, as you turn to grab the bottle. “So, do you wear that thing for fun?”

“My wife left me.” Beau mumbles, his voice deep and sullen. He won’t meet your gaze as he talks, which is a shame, because he’s pretty. Black hair with some silver passing through it. You can tell that he’s the type of guy that’s usually clean shaven, but he’s got a couple of days of scruff on him.

You pour him a little over a double. Closer to a triple. Being the miserable prick that he has grown to be, Beau takes this as incompetence rather than you just being kind to him. But, he doesn’t say anything.

“You must be a real asshole.” You say playfully, lips quirked at the sides. Beau lifts his gaze and stares back at you scoldingly. You grin. “Y’know, because there’s no way she left you because you’re ugly. Not with a face like that.”

He scoffs, shaking his head. Still, it’s been a long time since he was called handsome by a pretty girl in a bar. He lifts his glass and takes a sip of it. Setting it back down, he notices the clear view down your tank top that he’s got and looks back up at you.

..

“Take your shoes off.” Beau says it before you’re even through the door, tossing his keys down on the entryway table by the door. He walks ahead of you with his shoes on.

You frown slightly, but obey, kicking your sandals off and leaving them by the door. You trail slowly after him, taking your time to be nosey with the pictures on the walls.

There’s an empty frame in the middle. His wife. Beside that, is a picture of Beau. He’s holding two children, one can’t be older than a year old and the other is maybe six. He looks a little younger in this photo but the sun is glaring on it.

You reach out to straighten the frame so that you’ll be able to see it properly.

“Don’t touch that.”

You jump, turning quickly to find Beau at the end of the hall, staring at you.

“Come on.” He turns and you follow again, more obediently this time. He walks you through to the back of the house and opens the door to his office.

He’s sitting back in the leather office chair, one knee crossed over the other.

You trail your fingers over the plaque, his name engraved in it. Turning back to him, you watch as he sets a cigar between his lips and lights it with an expensive looking lighter.

“Thought you didn’t smoke?” You enquire.

He nods and sets the lighter down. He breathes out a puff of grey smoke and pulls the glass ashtray towards him.

“My wife made me quit.” He replies calmly. He’s still wearing that wedding ring, it sits heavily on his ring finger. You cross the office towards him, glancing down at the rug as you feel the soft material under your feet. Him being in your way makes no difference in where you’re headed.

Beau pushes the chair back slightly from the desk as you step past him, nudging the ashtray out of your way, then the keyboard for his computer. You lift yourself up onto the thick, expensive oak desk, sitting in front of him.

That flimsy sundress wouldn’t do much to hide your modesty from where you’re sitting anyway, but Cyclone knows exactly what you’re doing when your rest your feet on his thighs, legs parted just slightly. From where he’s sitting, in his oh-so-important office chair, he’s got a perfect view of the black satin between your legs.

“Your wife made you quit,” You muse, turning and leaning back on one of your palms. With your other hand, you lift the ashtray and examine the fresh ash and the not so fresh ash below that. “But you have an ashtray, and this pretty lighter.”

You set down the ashtray and pick up the lighter. His initials are monogrammed into the silver. He watches as you flick it open, ignite the flame and then flick it closed again.

“I said that she left me, didn’t I?” Beau sits back in the chair and parts his knees further. With your feet resting on his legs, this, in-turn, parts your legs further too.

He has no shame in letting his gaze fall between your legs now, he’s slow in bringing it back up to your face. He exhales another puff of smoke.

You set the lighter down, tilting your head at him.

“Who could leave such a delightful man behind?” You tease, knowing that if he was this miserable when she was still around then she did herself a favour.

Beau raises his eyebrows at you. He’s quiet for a moment, then speaks, “You’ve got an attitude problem, sweetheart.”

“Me? — Have you looked in a mirror recently, old man?” You scoff, pushing at his thigh with your foot. He catches your ankle, just holding it there, letting you know that he’s got you.

Your smirk grows, lips quirking upwards as you lean forwards. You reach out and brush your fingers over his cheek. Your fingertips are soft against his skin. You trail your touch along his temple, gently onto his forehead. You scrunch your brows as you touch the frown lines between his, mimicking the faces he would have made to get them.

Beau catches your wrist with his free hand, taking it away from his face. He squeezes your arm before dropping it, you almost shiver at the gentle enough force. He sets his cigar down in the ashtray and lifts his hand. He does the same, brushing his fingertips over your face. Your cheek, your temple, your jaw. You close your eyes as he touches you.

He sits back in the chair again, knees parted, bringing the cigar to his mouth once more.

You turn and pick up his glass of bourbon. He watches as you swish the liquid around almost carelessly in the glass, right next to his irreplaceable, top secret files. You bring it up and inhale softly.

“Do you like the taste of this stuff?” You ask, not particularly impressed by its smell. The Hard Deck doesn’t stock this kind of bourbon.

Beau nods, exhaling smoke once more. His fingers skim past your ankle and trace the bare skin of your calf. “Three hundred dollars a bottle, I’d sure hope that I like it.”

You hum. Beau watches, intrigued as you take a small sip. You let it sit on your tongue for a moment and then swallow. His eyes fall down to look at that black satin between your legs again, then back up as you hum softly.

“You like it?” Beau asks, brushing his thumb along your calf softly. You give an innocent shrug of your shoulders.

“You want to taste it?” You reply. Beau’s brows scrunch together just slightly, those frown lines reappearing and making you smile amusedly. You push yourself down from the desk and into his lap in one gentle movement, your knees nestled either side of his hips.

You lift the glass and take a small sip of the expensive liquid, then lean forwards. It’s on your lips when you first kiss him. Sweet and smoky, just like he likes it. His big, brutish hand comes up to cup the nape of your neck, holding you against him.

You nip softly at his bottom lip, holding back an excited whimper as he tugs gently at your roots. You caress your tongue against his, the flavour of it now on both of your tastebuds. Notes of caramel and vanilla.

You hum softly, gentle fingers tracing over the salt and pepper coloured stubble on his jaw, “Mm, I think I like the taste of bourbon.”

Beau’s hand trails down your spine, grabbing at your hip, his other hand coming to hold at your other. He pulls you firmer onto him. You grind yourself down onto him slowly.

You can taste the cigar on his tongue, now mixed with the bourbon. As much as you didn’t think you’d like the pairing, you like the way it tastes on him. It tastes like how you’d expect him to taste.

Well aware that you’re about to spill expensive bourbon on his even more expensive rug, Beau takes the glass from your hand and sets it back down on the desk, tugging you closer to him.

He pulls back and tilts your chin. Now that you’ve made it clear that he can have you, he takes a moment to decide whether he wants to take you upstairs and fuck you in his bed, or right here on his desk.

Slipping your hand between your legs, shifting back for better access, his decision is made for him as you stroke your palm over his black slacks. You lift your gaze, looking at him in the eye as you gently graze your touch over his bulge.

Beau’s thumbs stroke slowly over your hips.

He watches your face rather than your movements as you reach forwards and gently slip his belt from the first loop, then move to work open the buckle.

Your attention quickly shifts. Beau raises his brows as you abandon the now unbuckled belt and instead sit forwards to loosen his tie. This repeats, you get halfway through unbuttoning his shirt and move back to the belt. You’re nervous.

Beau catches your busied hands between one of his, holding them still against the leather of his belt. He does the work for you, unbuttoning his shirt the rest of the way and slipping it off of his shoulders, leaving him in a white undershirt and his slacks.

He watches the way your eyes study the material, as you try to make your mind up about what you’re about to do next. He decides for you, taking hold of the bottom of the undershirt, sitting back to lift it over his head and drop it down along with his shirt.

You bite the inside of your cheek softly as you trail your fingertips from his shoulders to his hips, tracing each inch of the newly exposed skin.

It’s been over fifteen years since he was with anyone else. He was expecting not to like this as much as he had liked being with his wife, but there’s a level of intrigue he gets from watching you. He enjoys it.

“Your turn.” Beau decides, thumb brushing against the hem of your sundress. You stand up from his lap. Beau picks his cigar back up and lights it again, watching as you step out of the dress.

He lifts his hand, index finger extended, then motions it in a small circle as he exhales another breath of grey smoke. Your lips quirk as you turn for him, slowing so that he can get a good look at you from behind before you’re facing him again.

…

[skinomyteethh]

to be or not to be?

pairing; kelly nickels x fem! reader

summary; thoughout kelly's newfound fame as bassist of L.A guns he had been acting different though you weren't sure if it was due to the restless nights they'd spend preforming or another aspect

contains/warnings; mentions of cheating. oral (female receiving). fingering. teasing. slight cum eating? little to no dialogue. may contain spelling errors :(

authors note; I need kelly nickels' magic stick in my mouth. also it deleted the damn ask so </3 anyways I hope y'all enjoy reading this!!!

cheating in the eighties or seventies rockstar scene was not at all unusual or taboo, it was extremely difficult to find a rockstar who hadn't cheated on their spouse. hell, robert plant not only had his wife maureen he also had a tour wife and a multitude of other groupies alongside him. these stories seemed to absolutely terrify [name], the thought of her boyfriend cheating on her while on tour was extremely stomach churning.

she sat on the sofa of their shared apartment, staring at the television emotionlessly and in deep thought until a phone call disrupted her thinking. a soft sigh parted her lips as she stood up and turned off the television, walking over to the phone in the kitchen, answering it.

"hello, this is [name]." she stated rather blandly, hearing the stumming of a guitar and clashing of cymbals as well as loud laughter. "hey babe, it's me, I just wanted to check up on you." his voice was somewhat raspy, it signaled that he had continued his excessive smoking habits. this whole rock 'n' roll scene seemed to be fueled off of addictions.

[name] hummed, maintaining her hold of the phone against her ear as she laid against the wall, fooling around with the coiled cord of the telephone before finally responding. "i've been alright, how about you? are you enjoying the tour?" her tone seemed curious yet curiosity was far from what she was feeling, she had her suspicions.

a short moment of silence came upon them, though it was shortly broken by the sound of Kelly chuckling. "it's been hectic, but i'm glad you're doing alright. we're heading back to Los Angeles later today!" just as she was about to respond she heard another voice, it was the voice of another female, she sounded extremely flirtatious and seemed to have a stupid valley girl accent.

"babe, sorry for cutting the conversation short but I have to go." he remarked, letting out a small laugh before hanging up. [name] stood still for a minute, the phone still in her hand, that whole predicament was strange, unsettling even. perhaps now Kelly was apart of the bunch of idiot rockstars who cheated on their partners/spouses.

she sauntered back to the sofa, turning the television back on. overwhelming thoughts began to fill her head as she leaned against the headrest and closed her eyes. what if Kelly had been cheating on her during these past months? what if he had been cheating on her prior to those months? those thoughts filled her head as she slowly drifted to sleep.

at around mid-day the loud, almost uncanny creaking of the front door both opening and shutting startled [name] out of her sleep. she sat up, feeling slightly dazed, not fully awake. her eyes glanced back as she heard the rather heavy bass guitar case drop onto the floor. Kelly hummed placing a soft, quick kiss on her forehead, taking a seat next to her.

upon feeling his lips against her forehead all thoughts prior to his arrival began swarming back, causing her mood to sour. he noticed her sudden and rather drastic mood change, wondering what on earth could have caused it. "did you have fun with her?" her question caught Kelly off guard, what could've caused her to think he was with another woman, despite what others may think he was a loyal, committed man with no desire for anybody but [name].

"what are you talking about?" he queried, raising an eyebrow in confusion. [name] responded with a scoff, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "you think i'm stupid? I heard that girl Kelly." flashbacks seem to hit him like a wave crashing onto the shore. the girl whose voice she had heard was tracii's new groupie girlfriend, he would never and could never cheat on [name].

"that was tracii's girl." [name] rolled her eyes, her expression was tainted with judgement, she still thought he was lying. Kelly sighed, closing his eyes. he was somewhat irritated at her accusations, out of all the people in this horrid world Kelly thought [name], his girlfriend of however many years would know he would never even think of doing something like cheating.

and he was going to prove it.

Kelly was going to make her realize he still loved her. she was slightly by his abrupt actions as he somewhat roughly threw her onto their bed, haphazardly taking his clothing off. his eyes trailed down to her white lace panties, he trailed down and slotted his hand in between her thighs, tugging at the waistband of her panties with his pearly white teeth.

a soft, desperate whine escaped her lips as he tugged them down. he hadn't bothered taking them off of her completely, they were low enough for him to engulf in her pretty little cunt. his warm tongue began to eat her out rather messily, his chin was dripping wet with her arousal as he slightly nudged his nose against her clit, licking up and down her folds as if she were to be his last meal ever.

her hands roughly tugged at the roots of her jet black hair, moaning out random praises as he brought her closer and closer to the edge. Kelly circled his tongue around her clit painfully slow, [name] glanced down at him, absolutely breathless, finally muttering a coherent sentence. "babe, please.."

desperation and neediness were clear in her tone as she quietly spoke. he hummed, bringing his pointer and middle fingers up to her lips. [name] shakily opened her mouth, enveloping his fingers in the warm of her mouth, coating them in her saliva so he could prep her and finally give her what she desired the most. after a minute or two he pulled his fingers out of her mouth, bringing them down to her entrance, inserting his pointer finger, then his middle finger.

[name] bit her bottom lip roughly, gripping the cool, white sheets below her as he slowly and rather gently fingered her. soon enough, one of her hands wrapped itself around his wrist, maintaining his fingers in place as she eagerly fucked herself against them like an absolute whore. Kelly simply watched her in amusement, placing soft, teasing kisses on her inner thighs.

her movements eventually became sloppier, less desperate and calculated, it signaled that she was getting extremely close to reaching the edge. he simply removed her hand from his wrist, pulling his fingers out of her. at that moment she seemed to despise the feeling of emptiness in her, whining as she took off his underwear.

Kelly desperately slotted his dick between her wet folds, the head bumping against her clit as he moved his hips back and forth, up and down. her arms reached up, and wrapped themselves around his neck, desperately holding onto him, loving the feeling. he halted his movements shortly after, grabbing the base of his dick, breathing heavily while he lined himself up with her hole, reaching his hand down, slapping her cunt before inserting himself into her slowly.

he moved his hips closer to her, watching as her soaking cunt absolutely devoured every inch of his cock. Kelly sighed euphorically as he finally inserted himself completely into her, bottoming out. [name] began to crave him even more than before, slowly moving her hips against him, his hands gripped onto her hips tightly, stopping her movements as he began to roughly thrust in and out of her.

each time their hips met her body felt an overwhelming wave of pleasure, her tits bouncing to the rhythm of his thrust. Kelly leaned down, pressing his chest to her back, placing soft kiss on the back of her neck as she moaned breathlessly. he reached his hand under her, groping one of her tits, adding even more pleasure into the mix.

every thrust, every groan, every touch drew her closer and closer to her orgasm. her moans began to grow louder and her body became somewhat limp as she finally reached her high, cumming all over his cock. "that's a good girl.." he mumbled, continuing to thrust into her, overstimulating her sensitive cunt.

his hip movements became sloppier by the second until he finally spilled his load deep inside her. slowly and shakily he pulled out, once again slotting his head in between her thighs, spreading her folds open with his fingers, pushing whatever mixture of their cum spilled out back into her.

finally, Kelly sat up, laying his head against the headboard, breathing heavily. "I hope that showed you how much I absolutely love you and how I would never cheat on you hun." he mumbled, bringing her closer to him. [name] let out a breathless chuckle, laying her head down on his abdomen, glancing up at him.

"it definitely proved something like that."

[youboredright]

Fate Cannot Be Changed

What happens if the strongest mafia known to be the coldest man alive gets arranged married with a sweet hearted woman? Can the innocent Yn change Gojo Satoru, biggest mafia in Yakuta? Maybe or maybe not..-

Mafia Gojo Saturo x Yn

(Part - 3)

Yn's POV

I did not realise when I feel asleep, but waking up I met a quiet house. Gojo left. Grabbing my phone the first thing I realised was that I got the first ever message from Gojo.

Gojo : get ready by 7 we will go to my parents house.

My head was filled with who the people was and who was Nora. My head was filled with thousands of thoughts so the day passed away quickly. I could just do the house chores and nothing else. Soon as I sat to have my evening tea the clock caught my attention. It was 6:30. Shit. I have 30 minutes to bath and get ready. By the time I was done with bathing and touching up my makeup, I was left with 5 minutes. I hastily wore the first dress that was in my closet. It was from my mother. It was a long black silk dress. It had a lot of memories. Before I could get all nostalgic I heard the a knock on my bedroom door. When did Gojo come. Opening it I saw Gojo, in his tuxedo. He looks extra tall. Oh gosh his legs and his biceps. Snap out if it Yn. I reminded myself that I am just a tool for Gojo. I simply nodded and approached him. "Let's go". The drive was mostly silent. And it was me who always spoke. "We are staying there tonight" Gojo announced. Shit. I wore this dress which is.. well nice but for sleeping I don't think is the best.

It was deadly quite, so as a good wife I tried to break. "You look nice" I said looking at him for a clue that he liked my compliment. He did look nice but specifically hot. Those veins popping out while one of his hand resting on the steering wheel . God I am falling it has not been even a month of our marriage. But Gojo did not say anything or even look at me. Did I make it more awkward ? " Sorry I didn't mean to make yo-" "We are not going to a party why did you wear a dress like that." Our voices overlapped. "I didn't know that." Oh that hurts. This black dress was nice. I got a lot of compliments. Was it that hard for him to just say I looked nice? "You are wearing a tuxedo?" And he ignored me. "Um Gojo? About last night. Were they your friends?" I said. "Look Yn I told you it's none of your business. Why can't you get a simple shit in your mind, huh?" He almost yelled. I hate loud sound. He knew a lot about my life. But is it wrong for me to be curious about his? About my life long partner. I just deeply sighed . "Yn" he said in a firm voice. It was the first time in the car he spoke. I flinched as I quickly looked at him. "Y-Yes?" I stuttered. " I wanted to talk about our-" he was interrupted by my phone ringtone. I quickly tired to silent it but Jake called me. I got the same chills running through my body. I started getting flashbacks of my old days. It has been almost 2 months now. I should feel happy he called but no. I felt sad and also a bit angry. I wanted to hear what Gojo was saying. But I just answered the call anyway. Throughout my call I felt Gojo's dark auroma filling the car. Reaching home, Gojo slammed his hand on the steering wheel even without looking at me and got out. As I rushed to him, I saw him standing outside. Oh was he waiting for me? He grasped my wrist tightly and leaned forward. "Yn don't dare to make my parents suspicious or worried."

Gojo's POV

Last night I was sober enough to remember what happened. Even after treating her the worst treatments, she still cares. I told her about Nora. Did I hurt her? She looks so fragile as if I might break her any moment. In my life I only cared about Nora, my mom, Geto and probably Shoko. But there's is something about Yn I feel I need to protect her. A feeling I never got before. Yesterday I stumbled myself and told her about Nora. I do still love her. And yesterday and also today when Yn asked about Geto and Shoko I was, well very tired to answer. Last night I saw Yn's eyes filled with concern and care, like actual feeling. Nora was the last person I saw the concern and care in her eyes. It makes me want to melt. Her touch is so warm, makes me crave her touch more. But I will not fall in love with someone I am forced married with. I had and have to remind myself not to fall for her. Because if my plan works then this marriage will end within the next 4 months.

...

I can feel her soft breathing. Her warmth is radiating and I could feel that as she looked outside filled with thoughts. She looked so good in her silk black dress. Her breasts were pumped and I could see them. I wish I was the only one who could look at those. She had the perfect body. Big but not huge breasts and ass. And my favourite thick thighs. She is so pretty and innocent. It almost makes me want to ruin her. Make her dirty and show her what is my kind of love. This woman, only if she knew what she did to me within a few days of our marriage. But I will not fall for her. I learnt a very good lesson from my past. And I will make sure I divorce her as soon as possible, when I will be done with her parents. "Yn" I said in a firm voice. She flinched as she quickly looked at me. "Y-Yes?" She stuttered. Am I that scary? " I wanted to talk about our-" I was interrupted by Yn's phone. I nodded as she answers. "Jake? Hey? How have you been?" Yn spoke in a soft yet confused voice. I don't normally eavesdrop but who the fuck was Jake? I felt weird and agitated. Why would MY wife, who wore MY ring, lived in MY house talk to someone specifically a boy? But then again I had no right to be. What was worst is Yn let out a soft chuckle hearing something 'Jake' said. It felt worst. I looked at her as I realised that I got a sudden urge to stop the car roughly pull her by the neck and kiss her. And then make a lot of dark hickeys and show the fucker the hickeys specifically the ones on her boobs and nec-. What the hell did I just imagine, making out with my arranged wife? The one I hated the most? Shit, what was happening to me. But I got a feeling that I had to remove Jake from my wife. Probably murder him. He got some nerve to talk to wife and make her chuckle. As I stopped the car in front of my parents house I slammed my hand on the steering wheel out of frustration, causing Yn to flinch. Great. Why am I getting annoyed just by remembering 'Jake' ? Why do I even care? I couldn't answer as I got out of my car.

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To be continued

[nikodimopoulos]

changes; self para

featuring: yiannis & helen dimopoulos mentions: @heyymikki

Even after watching the leaked security footage over, and over again, Niko couldn't quite believe what it was he was witnessing -- and for a person who put a lot of stock in the phrase seeing is believing, that was unusual.

Either way, Alejandra was dead. That much was for sure.

Everything felt like it was on fire; members of the lower ranks were going off the grid, skipping town entirely for fear of being next in line, higher-level personnel were high tailing it to Vegas, choosing to skip town and out of what was now seen as completely uneven territory between the cartel and the competition that had taken Alejandra out. After all, what protection could they possibly have in Tonopah when not even their most protected sovereign was safe?

Worst of all -- it was all because of two men he'd once trusted. Perhaps even with his life.

Word had spread like wildfire, so it wasn't a surprise when his parents had summoned him to their home, even urging him to close the restaurant down early to do so -- yet instead of getting right to the point once he arrived, they dawdled, sitting him down at the table with a coffee and making small talk. It was unusual.

Finally, after half an hour of runaround, Niko asked in his native tongue, "Can we cut the shit?"

This prompted a stern look from Yiannis from across the table. "Remember who you're speaking to, Nikolaos." The older man warned, prompting a heavy sigh to fall from Helen's lips only moments later.

"Stop it, both of you." His mother sat, topping off her husband's mug before taking a seat beside him, the both of them facing their son. "Nikolaos,we have something important to discuss with you."

Yiannis interjected, "and you need to keep your emotions in check for what we have to say. Behave yourself."

Niko's knuckles practically turned white as he tightened his grip on his coffee mug. "What is it?" He pushed, choosing to ignore the slight. Obviously it must have been big, not only because the Tonopah chapter of LS was dismantling, but also because Yiannis seemed to be deflecting his own emotions onto his son. That was how these things typically went, anyways.

The two of them shared a knowing look, and Helen nodded at her husband to go on. "Los Santos is done here. Which means a couple of things," he began, keeping his son's steady gaze. "One; there's no more of the cartel's money flowing through the restaurant. None. Which mean's Dionysos will be operating at a distinctive loss in the coming weeks, going on indefinitely. Two; if we wanted to continue operating, our best bet would be to contact the Vegas chapter, meet with their leadership, set up a deal --"

Helen interrupted, "but it's not a given that they'll bring our business in." She shook her head. "Las Vegas is a big city. Why would they bet on a small, local family operation when they're in the casino's pockets? The theatres? It would be a losing game for them to bet on us."

A pause lingered between them, and Niko could feel his stomach starting to churn. "What are you trying to say?" he asked, jaw clenched so tightly it was making the vein in his forehead start to pop. It was a ridiculous question, really -- Niko knew exactly what they were going to say.

"My son," Yiannis leaned forward, a hand resting on Niko's shoulder, "we're returning home. To Patras." He shook his head, gaze softening slightly. "There's nothing for us here anymore. It's time to go."

Niko stayed stoic, unblinking as the metaphorical bomb was dropped on top of him. Any words of protest sat thick in his throat -- that's not true, we can figure it out, we can make it work -- and instead he offered a simple nod.

Yiannis gave a wide smile, glancing back at his wife with a hearty laugh before giving Niko's shoulder a squeeze. "That's my boy, we knew you'd be on board." The man bellowed, as usual taking his son's silence whichever way benefited him most. They both did, really -- that was why saying anything at all was, at times, worse than just keeping his mouth shut.

"We always talked about going back. We didn't know it'd be this soon, under these circumstances, but..." Helen trailed off, offering a dismissive wave of her hand, "it's better this way. We can retire early. And you, my love, can set up shop back in Patras, maybe invest in another opportunity. Whatever you want to do, you'll have our full support --"

Niko's brows narrowed, a hand raised, "Mom, I --" he scoffed incredulously, unable to help himself. "Why would I go back?"

Helen's expression deflated, mimicking her son's -- for a moment, it was easy to see the resemblance. "Why wouldn't you?" She asked.

"Because I've been here for thirty years," Niko shook his head. "I have a life here, I have --" Mikayla's face flashed quickly in his mind, the thought of leaving her behind after all the promises he had given her, the commitment he had made not sitting well with him. Of course, he wasn't ready to open that can of worms with his parents, but he'd be lying if he said it wasn't at the forefront of his mind in that moment. "-- that's not possible for me right now."

A moment of silence passed between the three of them. "But Patras is your home, Nikolaos," remarked Yiannis. "You would abandon it?"

"I'm not abandoning it. Christ, baba, do you hear yourself?" Yiannis tensed, opening his mouth to say something else before Niko sighed, placing his hand back down on the table. "I'm sorry, I don't mean any disrespect but you're the ones who brought me here in the first place -- you even pushed me into becoming an American citizen."

The logic seemed to assuage Yiannis, thankfully, his expression softening. "So, what?" Helen spoke up next, her eyes becoming glassy with tears. "We're supposed to leave without our son?"

Immediately a sense of guilt washed over Niko, tongue poking at the inside of his cheek. This wasn't what he wanted -- wasn't what any of them wanted -- but he truly didn't see another alternative. There were a lot of choices he'd relented to over the years, a lot he'd sacrificed to become a man -- his mental health, his agency, his morals -- but leave behind the last thirty years? That's not something he was willing to do anymore, not when he finally seemed to have a chance at happiness. At something.

Swallowing thickly, Niko forced himself to tear away his gaze from his parents, looking down at the cold, untouched coffee inside of the mug.

Everything was about to change.

"Yeah." Niko answered softly, sliding the mug further away. "Yeah, mom. I suppose you are."