Snapshots
a/n; This is kind of half a blurb and half a fic?? Idk, it's just horny thoughts expanded tbh. now, this is NOT sanitary at all. PLEASE do not do this without thoroughly cleaning the shoe first. You are asking for a yeast infection and a UTI otherwise. But this is fiction, so let's all pretend he did a little sterilising beforehand! however, that's not hot to read, so im not gonna write it, but let's play pretend!! Thank you, ily <3
Content warnings; boot grinding, d-word, degradation, jealousy, bratty behaviour, dom matty, spit, swearing, and teasing. But I think thats it?? I'm so sorry if I'm missing some!
word count; 2.1k ish
(shout out to Kirke @nowshesdoingitallthetime for once again causing this. you are my fav little devil on my shoulder encouraging this behaviour...)
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*click* *click* *click*
“Okay and now look to the left!” You hear the photographer shout. matty turns his head exactly as she asks. But apparently, it's not quite right, judging by how she walks over to him and poses his body.
you can feel the jealousy in every fucking nerve when her fingers graze the edge of Matty's jaw, adjusting his head half a centimetre. The move was so small it was completely unnoticeable to anyone else, but what was noticeable was the sly smirk on the photographer's face as her fingers lingered on Matty’s skin.
Your boyfriend remains completely oblivious, as he has been all day. You, however, noticed it as soon as you walked in together. You weren't planning on coming to play jealous girlfriend, you were prepared to be silently supportive.
But when she spent 40 minutes trying different outfits on Matty and showering him with compliments, you knew something was up.
You studied her every move from then on. The way she “adjusted” Matty’s hair after almost every take, running her fingers through every strand in a way that had Matty practically purring.
You look at the way she pulls at his clothes, untucking and tucking in his shirt multiple times. and you also watch her eyes dart down to his exposed stomach every. fucking. Time. You swear you can almost see the cogs turning in her head when she catches a flash of the rose tattoo on his hip.
Every joke he makes, she laughs just a little too hard. Matty is funny, but making a shitty pun is not worthy of doubling over and acting like you're at a standup show. Yet, every vaguely funny comment he makes has her cackling and wiping tears that are streaming down her cheeks.
So you were fuming. Partially at her, Matty had introduced you as his girlfriend at the start of the session. Which had earned him an unimpressed hum from her and you a petty wave. she didn't seem to take too much notice of that fact, though, judging by the way she's stroking his cheek right now.
But you're also pissed at Matty for playing right into her hand.
You knew he was egotistical, but the way he was practically turned into a giggling schoolgirl over the shoot drove you insane. His attention whore actions usually make you laugh, probably because they're normally aimed at you. as soon as you start rambling about how much you love him, matty becomes a child star, immediately glowing at the praise.
But it's remarkably less entertaining when he's lapping up the attention of a woman who is practically getting on her knees in front of you.
And maybe you took it too far, walking over to him mid-conversation and grabbing his face, pressing your lips onto his harshly, you take advantage of the gasp that leaves his lips to press your tongue into his mouth, licking inside and moaning excessively loud.
Matty pulls you off once his logical brain overtakes his horny one, but you can still see he's slightly dazed when he goes back to chatting with the photographer. The haze in his eyes and the pink flush on his cheeks take a few minutes to fully fade, especially when your hand slides onto his thigh and grips his skin possessively.
You hang off his arm for the rest of the break and move closer to the set when they start up again. Every adjustment she suggests you swoop in and make before she can, punctuating each one with a peck on Matty’s lips and a glare her way.
Matty knows what you're doing, and after you lingered a little too long on one kiss, he pulls you in with a hand around the base of your neck.
You feel his breath on your ear before he starts talking, “I know what you're doing. Behave.”
You don't listen to his demands. Why should you when he's been gagging for every piece of attention this stranger gives him? So you play it up even more, determined to beat this woman at her game.
whilst you might win that war, you certainly don't win the one waging with matty judging by his tense shoulders and rolling eyes.
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The ride home is full of tension, Matty's knuckles are white from how hard he's gripping the steering wheel, and the hand that usually lives on your thighs is firmly stuck on the gearstick.
You cant deny that the mix of his palpable anger now and how fucking good he looked at the photo shoot had riled you up. Every tick of his jaw makes your thighs tighten. And you swear you see a smile cross Matty's face as you cross and uncross your legs for the 20th time, desperate to relieve some pressure.
As soon as you get in the door, Matty is barking orders at you.
“Follow me. And be quiet. You've done enough talking today.” Any bratty behaviour left simmering inside you was gone. You trailed behind Matty silently, walking into the front room and starting to sit down on the sofa beside him.
“Nope, floor,” Matty says bluntly.
... no, he's joking. Surely.
“What?” you tilt your head at the man in front of you as you speak, assuming this is another one of his unfunny jokes (but you're sure the photographer would be fucking cackling at it.)
“You heard me, Don't play dumb now, baby. Kneel.” You don’t know whether it’s the intensity of his eyes or the assertiveness of his voice, but you do exactly as he asks. Sinking to your knees like you had done for him so many times before.
Your hands start to move to his fly instinctively, assuming you'd be apologising the only way you know how, letting Matty fuck your throat until you cant speak. But his hands smack yours away before you can even touch the denim of his jeans.
“Thats not gonna cut it today, baby. i need a proper apology this time.” Matty's foot slides between your legs, his boot sitting between your thighs as you hover just above it.
“I want you to grind on my boot, sweet girl. Put on a proper show for me, yeah?” Matty nods at you, and you don't even think before immediately nodding back, sinking down on his boot below you. in your mind, you know you should be scoffing at him and rolling your eyes, but your body moves without you telling it to.
You can already feel wetness pooling in your panties, throbbing at the idea of being so powerless under him. You gasp as soon as the cool leather of the boot touches your core, goosebumps blooming over your skin.
Your hips start rutting against the leather, sliding your hands around Matty's calf as you experimentally grind down on his shoe. Matty feels your fingers tighten around his leg as you clit brushes agaisnt the leather, the slight scratch of the boot making your head spin.
You rock your hips dumbly against Matty's shoe, arching your back when it brushes harshly over your bundle of nerves. Your ruby red nails dig into Matty’s leg through his jeans as you cling to him desperately.
One of your hands slides behind you so you can rock your hips even deeper on his boot, laying your palm flat the ground and canting your hips up desperately. Your thighs burn with every rock you make, but the burn in your core is stronger than anything else.
“thats it. now stick your tongue out, fuck. that's it angel,” Matty palms himself over his jeans as he stares down at you, groaning as he watches spit drip from your tongue and fall on the boot below, making every move you make slicker and more dizzying.
Matty looks pretty fucked out for someone who hasn't been touched, a thin sheen of sweat sits on his skin, his dick straining in his jeans as he watches you like a hawk. He studies your every movement like he is watching a cinematic masterpiece, taking in every move you make and committing it to memory.
His jaw clenches as he fights every urge in his body to grab you by the hair and pull under him. Visions cross his mind of him jackhammering his hips inside you until you're screaming his name, watching the bluge in your stomach as he pumps fucking every inch of himself inside you. But he stays strong, keeping his eyes trained on you with every move you make.
“Thats it, shine my boots with your cunt. Good girl” Your eyes roll into the back of your head as Matty drags out his words and pushes his boot up, the pressure against your clit making the world around you fall into a haze.
A flush covers your cheeks and chest, and Matty smirks at how blissed out you look.
Fucking you dumb is something that will never fail to amaze him, watching a smart girl become a babbling mess because of him does wonders for his ever-growing ego. It's not like he needed the boost, but your brain melted out of your ears as soon as he starts talking to you like he owned you.
You can't help but squirm as you start moving closer towards the edge, the pressure building inside you slowly becoming too much. Whimpers and whines fall from your lips as your hips speed up, pleading with Matty to let you cum without saying it. Luckily, Matty has seen you fall apart under him enough times to know exactly what you're asking.
“You getting close, baby?” Matty smirks as he speaks, “‘course you are. Filthy girl wants to cum all over daddy's boots.” your jaw drops at the nickname, and you nod as best you can, whimpering with every circle of your hips.
“Beg." he demands
"Tell me you're fucking sorry and beg to cum,” Matty's jaw drops when he sees tears start falling down your face, desperation filling your every nerve. Soon, you're sobbing and begging Matty for mercy, your hips bucking wildly.
“Please. I’m so- fuck- im so sorry, Daddy. Please let me cum, ill be so good, I promise. Just- ah! let me cum. Please.” Your teeth sink into your bottom lip as you fight to hold in your orgasm, but every rut of your hips is making pushing you closer.
“So good for me, such a dirty slut. Okay, angel, cum for me.” As soon as the words leave Matty’s lips, your cumming, the rubber band inside you snapping.
White spots dance across your vision as you push even harder down on Matty’s boot, letting the tough leather push you through your orgasm with every circle of your hips. Your chest heaves, and your jaw shakes as your orgasm drags on, intense pleasure wracking your every nerve.
Your thighs grip tightly around his boot as you reach your peak, but soon enough they're going lax, your hips slowing down until you’re motionless sitting on Matty's shoe, panting wildly and fighting to catch your breath. His fingers move from his lap and grip your chin, forcing you to stare at him as he speaks.
“Don't leave a mess. clean it up for me baby, be a good girl.” Matty nods at his boot, looking at you expectantly with a sick smile covering his face.
You sink further down on the floor below you, ignoring the way the cold concrete scratches your knees as you slide. Dark brown eyes meet yours as you hold eye contact with Matty. staring up at his as you stick your tongue out, and start to lick the leather covered in your slick. An exaggerated moan falls from your lips at the taste, and Matty’s jaw drops as he watches your tongue lap at his shoe.
After a few more seconds of you swiping your tongue over the leather, Matty is dragging you into his lap, gripping your hips harshly as you settle on top of him. He can't help smirking as you hover over him. Your cheeks are pink as you stare at him. The same pretty pink covers your lips. undoubtedly from desperately bitting at them to try and dampen your needy whimpers.
“Don't be so selfish now, princess, give daddy a taste,” you smirk at Matty before gripping his jaw, watching in awe as his mouth drops open and his tongue falls out.
Power skitters up your spine as you lean forward and let a drop of spit fall from your bottom lip, watching it drip and fall onto your boyfriend's tongue. A grin immediately pulls at your lips when you hear the groan that is ripped from his chest.
As soon as Matty tastes the mix of your slick and spit, he's dragging you deeper into his lap, forcing his tongue in your mouth to desperately lick every trace of your release from the inside of your mouth.
Needy hands grip each other's skin, groping every piece you can get your hands on. Eventually, Matty pulls away from your lips, his eyes dropping to watch a string of spit spread between you. His head falls back against the sofa behind him, staring at you in awe.
“I'm booking another photo shoot with her,” he teases, his chest heaving as he desperately sucks in air to his lungs.
“The fuck you are.” You surge forward and capture his lips again, smiling as you feel his lips turn up as soon as your skin touches his.
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𝓓𝓲𝓪𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓾s
Part 2.
Spider is 19, Y/n and Lo’ak are 18, Neteyam is 19, Kiri is 19, Tuk is still 7-8.
‘Kxa’ran’ is a random na’vi name I made up. He is 18.
Disclaimers:
Mentions of uncomfortableness, trying to steal neteyams girl, lo’ak and spider being the y/n protector squad once again, Jake giving fatherly advice, Lo’ak swinging (it's called a punch, bitch) Neteyam and Y/n riding off into the sunset 💙👏😫
Not rlly smut but gets a lil steamy at the end.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
Y/n was a shadow.
She hid herself within the corridors of a raincloud, gentle touches of droplets caressing her skin.
She hides in the whispers, gently singing through the flowers that stitched up the bark of a tree.
Her vision warped into a blur of sounds and colors. I suppose that's why she yearned for nightfall.
On occasion, the sun looms over us like a scolding parent. Fervid gazes and persecuting streaks of heat. A torrid spotlight refusing surrender.
But oh, how she loved the night…
A veil of sounds, shapes, sporadically neon shaded by the incandescent bioluminescence of Pandora.
Secrets and stories scattered among a sea of stars. The moon, a searchlight for souls.
Alluring sirens of the dusk, dragging us to delirium.
If dark, if dreary, if dangerous, if endlessly indefinite, why so amorous?
She spoke to the stars, stole secrets from the sky, and wore moonlight as if a veil.
Sobs and sorrows for the forgotten stories. Requiems for rain clouds and silent storms.
Perhaps that's why she loved the night.
When the world became a shadow, she didn't feel so alone…
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
Gathering in groups was a normality for the omaticaya.
Today, a group of na’vi was sent to forage herbs, pick fruit, wash away the dirt and grime embedded over time in things like bowls and objects for eating.
They left high camp a bit after morning, departing themselves from the clan’s rocky stronghold and descending below to the jungle.
Y/n sat perched under a tree,
She gently traced her fingertips up the lines of a small white flower, curiosity and soft wonder embedded within the universe of her eyes.
Observation is a powerful thing. Hearing, sensing, seeing things past others grasp of understanding.
It's a binding freedom
“Y/n?”
Shaken from her fortress of solitude, Y/n is met with another shadow.
This one looms. It stalks over what little light Y/n allowed in her small dwelling of dusk within the shade of the tree.
It's raining, but it's not the kind that nurtures.
Plants fall to their knees under the man’s thunder of a laugh, mercilessly triumphant, yet accompanied by no accomplishment.
Kxa’ran.
Y/n peers up in recognition.
Kxa’nan earned himself a place in the flock of warriors Jake trained, Neteyam included. Neteyam and him were commoners of the same stability. Both warriors, neck and neck. Where the Golden Child stood, Kxa’nan rising behind him. One compared to the other. The silent rivalry of two warriors.
Kxa’nan was a shadow. Not a shadow like Y/n. He was a void, it repels vulnerability and authenticity.
Kxa’nan’s movements were rehearsed, not-so subtly flexing himself for Y/n's uncomfortable gaze.
You hate it when he flirts with you because he flirts with everyone. It's a cruel joke, really. Disguising something as binding as affection, to cradle someone's heart within the palms of your hands, to build it a home out of glass and shatter it.
“Kxa’nan.”
You greet politely.
You didn't like him. But you weren't an asshole.
He laughs.
What was even funny?
“Whatcha doing here all alone, huh? I'd thought you'd be with your little friends?”
You assume he's talking about Spider and Lo’ak.
Y/n shrugs, avoiding eye contact as best as one can. Trying to focus on the intertwining pattern within the sky, the dim golden halo that laid itself on the tree, leaking through the canopy-quilted and stitched with shades of green.
Kxa’nan dips his gaze down to Y/n's hands. Nimble, soft things. Drawing lines of tranquility in their wake.
His touch invades streaks of silent panic through your body when he reaches down to touch your hands, and the flower cradled within.
“Is that a flower? It's very beautiful..where did you find it?”
His voice is
You felt exposed.
Choppy, unfinished breaths tumbling from your lips.
His mere presence overbeared you, yet, Kxa'nan was nothing but a hollow shell.
His figure was made of pesky shadows and illusions of whispers that taunted you, like the laugh of a viperwolf.
He was a thief of trust.
He saw something, an interchangeable force the at spread like the roots to each person, tying us to this shape of vulnerability that appeared as a plaything that held no value to him.
Trust, to him, was a game. A continuance of an arousing match of case and capture, where you find yourself caged.
It's like a scythe when it hits, I panic.
Jake calls it anxiety.
Jake dragged his knowledge of it with him when he came to Pandora.
Jake taught you how to breathe.
Funny enough from the man that once needed a mask.
Taught you how to count your breaths from 10 to 1. How to count the leaves on a branch and wait for your chest to not feel so instantaneously heavy.
For a moment the stars fall. The shadow that once deemed itself an attendant of comfort is now a shallow pool of a storm. The ground feels cold, heat rushes to your wrists.
The words bombard your brain.
Leave me alone.
Leave me alo-
“Hey! Back off. I thought I told you not to bother her.”
A familiar five fingered hand finds its home onto Kxa’nan’s shoulder, yanking him back and standing in front of you.
A tall na’vi with the sides of his head shaved and lazily tied off braids barricades you.
“Can you not fucking count? The 8th time this week I've found you bothering her. Don't you have something better to do?”
Lo’am shoved the boy backwards, his voice a low hiss of annoyance.
Lo’ak was an anarchist of his own recklessness. His gaze grazed with fire unapologetically unable to sit still.
Sometimes the smoke and ash becomes a haze of intangible adrenaline. preservations for one’s safety wither away under the charred sky. Lo’ak’s anger was a shallow thing, much like his mother.
That's where people fail to truly see, Lo’ak
He was just as protective as Neteyam, if not more. Lo’ak and Neteyam were simply two sides of one stick, one sharp, one blunt. One can be applied as a knife, the other in aid as a crutch or to lean on.
Kxa’nan scoffed.
“I can't count? Tell me, how many fingers am I holding up?”
Kxa’nan taunted Lo’ak by jabbing at his “demon blood hands”.
A smaller, pale figure appeared next to you, grabbing your arm, pulling me to your feet,
In the unwelcoming sequence of three na’vi, spider remains unwavering.
His gaze stern, annoyed.
“Get lost, idiot.”
Spider glares.
Your wrists don't feel so hot. The ground doesn't sink, the shadows aren't so loud.
Always count on Lo’ak and Spider. As stupid as the two can be.
They were your boys. Your brothers. A type of love that was stitched together out of mismatched pieces.
They fit if you place them in the right position.
“Touch her again and i’ll punch your ass so far into the future you’ll meet the next generation.”
Lo’ak stands, fangs bared, chest almost touching.
Kxa’nan laughs.
It's thin
it's fake
it's forced.
“Y/n, yawne, did you forget to leash your companions before leaving?”
He smirks at you, and you facepalm at the storm approacching
There's a silence. Worth 6 beats.
“The fuck did he just say?”
Lo’am rhetorically asks the jungle air, before turning to spider.
“Spider. What did he just say?”
“I think he called us animals, Lo’ak.”
“Should we let that slide?”
“Me personally? I would never.”
Spider sighs disapprovingly. Like a parent gently urging a child to make the right decision, clean up their act.
That's the beauty of Lo’ak and spider.
They fail to see the true weight of any situation when the two face it together.
Everything dark and dreary dusts away under a bad joke and some back-and-forth
“Guys. C’mon.”
You reach for Lo’ak, tugging him by his armband away from this quandary he's planted himself in.
Lo’ak follows reluctantly, sparing a lingering glare at Kxa’nan.
“Try that shit again, I dare you!”
Lo’ak calls over his shoulder.
“He dares you!”
Spider fans the fire.
You groan, not expecting to be babysitting two idiots today.
“For the love of Eywa you two-”
Your boys. You loved them anyways.
If you were a shadow, Lo’ak and spider were your clouds. Protecting you from looming notions that threatened to tear the darkness.
Neteyam watched from afar.
Neteyam wasn't normally a very angry person.
Inconspicuous glares and silent mumbles. Flicks of his tail subtly revealing his brewing emotions.
Other than that, Neteyam wore a mask.
Accustomed to pleasantries, never daring to chase beyond the notion of familiarity. Having an audience, the constant need to entertain those even he swore to eywa he couldn't tolerate, was a burdening thing.
Eye contact. Smile. Sit up straight. Don't laugh too loudly.
Some swore if they turned neteyam over and searched the right corners, you'd find puppet strings.
His mask grew with the years, cracking only in small fragments wear vulnerability leaked through the crevices, small silent outbursts of leashless emotions.
It's a rare sight.
But at this moment, Neteyam swore Lo’aks fire was spreading.
Loneliness came as a luxury for neteyam. It was the only time he allowed himself to truly become hers.
Some nights, all he dreamed of was her.
Her. Her. Her. Her. Her.
Oh, how he longs for her.
If he kissed her, if he even so much as grazed her skin, he'd fear shed disappear back to the shadows.
Coaxing hesitance was a second-nature concept.
Yet, he's haunted by an insatiable compulsion to protect her.
Ghosts of daydreams, husks of lingering touches and reincarnations of longing gazes. Rain carries ghosts that cherish the fragments of their lives within the darkness of the clouds, because the vexatious luminescent antagonist we claim to be sunlight, provides no sanctuary to a ghost.
Perhaps that's why his daydreams abandon him.
Perhaps the dissipate to his own negligence.
He was always yours. He didn't want you in the way Kxa’nan did. Your heart wasn't a game or an object to be used, then discarded.
You were a story. He would treat you like one of your flowers unless you wished otherwise.
He would do anything for you.
He would steal every happy ending for you.
You preferred small corners in which he couldn't fit. You preferred night to day.
Neteyam was in sunlight.
You were a shadow.
And sunlight and shadow cannot touch.
Neteyams attempts to dim himself always became futile. Dreams of touching you became glimpses. It lingers in a flurry of color, his palms longing for your warmth.
Vexation was silent.
It never screamed.
Until this moment.
Kiri, whom was rambling about the river crystals she planned on collecting, thanking neteyam for letting him use his basket as she waded in the shin deep Creek,
Neteyam’s lne of focus scrutinized the sight a few trees ahead of him.
Kxa’Nan grabbing your hands, rubbing his thumb along your knuckles.
He couldn't hear, but neteyam could see your agape mouth, he sensed inaudible shallow breaths.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
Aggression stirred beneath his skin.
How he watched Kxa’nan skip off like nothing happened, after Spider and Lo’ak made their grand entrance and not-so-swift escape.
“Pandora to Neteyam!”
Kiri chucked a yovo fruit at his head.
The man had been staring into space for the last 6 minutes.
Kiri personally didn’t spare something as precious as brain cells on something as meager as the two unbearable creatures she called her brothers, but the occasional pestering that accompanied their relationship has become a necessity.
Kiri had found some feathers near the river on her hunt for crystals.
She was offering them to neteyam for his knife sheath (she’s been begging him for weeks. His sheath is just ‘too boring’ for her taste.)
when she found her brother mindlessly wandering his gaze ahead.
“Ow-
What the hell-
Kiri!”
He glared at his sister.
Kiri huffed.
“Sxkwang. You’ve been zoned away for minutes now! Are you loosing your hearing?”
Neteyam rolls his eyes, his mood suddenly deflated.
“No. I’m fine…”
Kiri’s playfulness withers for a moment.
Kiri was a lot of things.
Kiri was modest, compassionate, candid and capable.
She spoke to the forest the same way Y/n spoke to the stars.
Kiri perched herself next to her brother, nudging him with her tail.
“You okay?”
He shook his head.
Something flickers past Neteyam’s features.
It’s soft, light, a thin layer but its presence isn’t going unnoticed.
Something that can almost be mistaken as regret contorts his features. His confidence has fallen. Not completely, only slightly. A somber shade of gray dances past his face.
There’s a few beats of silence.
It’s not uncomfortable. It’s understanding. The two siblings find a common ground between this void of conflict.
“Do you think mom was ever afraid of Dad?”
Kiri stayed quiet for a moment, the question stilling her.
“Mom? Our mom? Neytiri Tskaha Mo’at’ite?? Afraid of our father?
You humor me, brother.
If anything, dad should be afraid of mom.”
Kiri chuckles, leaning back against the tree.
Neteyam chuckles as well, but it sobers itself in a flash of memory.
When they were small, Neteyam and his siblings would curl around the fire In their families marui, neteyam would sit next to y/n, while Lo’ak laid his head on her shoulder, obnoxiously snoring into like the 6 year old he was.
Kiri sat on the other side, looking up in awe at her father as Jake spoke.
Jake told his children stories of a time that was before the marine learned to see.
He grasped the essence of life: the immunology of pandora. The power, the secret to growth, a true appreciation for the relative importance of things, order, and balance.
He told his children of the corpse of a life now forgotten, where the fallen hometree remains but memories rots.
Jake prayed to eywa his memories could rot with it.
He told stories of earth, as well.
Comparing his wife to Cupid, fond of arrows. How she stopped his heart without even grazing it.
Neteyam was an idiot for love stories. Especially as a child.
Particularly his parents’ love story.
How two people, worlds part find themselves together under the sky of pandora. The day they met. The day the stars aligned and two hearts disregarded the burdens of a cruel reality, and found a home within a war. Found intimacy through the most painful of grieving.
If Jake and Neytiri, a former human and a na’vi,
Why not Neteyam and Y/n?
Why not the sun and a shadow?
Kiri stilled for a moment.
“I guess..maybe there was fear of mom’s loyalties being internally tested?
Maybe she thought she would have been betraying her people if she mated with dad.
Remember the Cupid story?”
Neteyam contemplates it for a moment.
“But mom didn’t mate with dad till after his iknimaya? He was already one of the people. He claimed his ikran, and through dreamhunt.”
Kiri shrugged.
“True. But he kinda got his na’vi card revoked when hometree fell. Don’t you think?
Are you suggesting you want a woman to shoot you with an arrow?”
Kiri chuckled.
Neteyam can’t help but snicker.
A somber stillness comes over him once again, his voice is quiet. Fragile.
“Do you think at one point they thought that..
That maybe they just couldn’t be together because dad was a human?
Because two people are so different, it’s never even a possibility?
That our insecurities fester into doubt?”
Kiri stares with tints of concern for her brother, placing a hand on his shoulder.
He seemed to be getting a bit too worked up for a light conversation.
There was something about embedded underneath. Hidden.
“What if-“
“They loved eachother.”
Kiri interrupts Neteyam’s maddening anxiety for a moment.
“They loved one another.
It’s almost impossible to neglect when your so deeply in love with someone. Even if you convince yourself conditional, unbinding. They were in love.
She held him even out of his avatar when he was dying in that shack.
They were always meant to be, Neteyam…what is this really about?”
Neteyam swallows thickly.
His deep, accented voice grazing the edges of a sharp concept, dripping with denial.
“Do you think the sun and a shadow can fall in love?”
Kiri is quiet for a moment.
She’s not confused.
For once, her brother's mask cracks.
For once; the warrior needs protecting.
There's Something unguarded and raw behind his gaze. There’s something fragile.
And most protect fragile things.
“This is about Y/n, isn’t it. What happened, Neteyam?”
Neteyam sighed.
“Kxa’nan.”
Kiri’s eyes thinned at the mention of his name.
He once ‘accidentally’ tripped her while she was walking, and refused to come clean when neteyam confronted him.
Jake didn’t even like him.
And Jake was the chief of fucks sake.
“What did he do?”
Kiri suddenly felt her own wall go up.
She thought of Y/n as much as a sister as she would Tuk. Memories of giggling and gossiping after the brothers and tuk were asleep and Jake and neytiri went on dates. Telling eachother stories and braiding each others hair.
You were a shadow, and Kiri was your Venus.
“He touched her hands. Just like-
Grabbed them.
And then she had one of her-“
Neteyam makes a motion with his hands to indicate erratic breathing but ends up just deeming himself laughable.
“She had an…asthma attack?”
Kiri made her first guess.
“No-
She had like-“
Neteyam struggles to articulate himself.
“You know when her breath gets kinda shallow? And she just-“
Kiri spares him the embarrassment.
And herself a headache.
“Yes yes. I know-“
She freezes.
“Wait. You saw this happen?”
“..yes I thought I made that clear-“
“And you didn’t go and protect her?”
“….”
Kiri smacked neteyam upside the head.
“Ow! Kiri! That’s the second time you’ve hit me!”
“You skxawng! You fool! You dumbass!
You didn’t go to her aid!?
Eywa help us all. You’re right. You suck at this.”
Neteyam’s ears pin back and he winced.
“I was going to-“
“Bullshit!”
“Kiri I swear!”
“She’s afraid of me!”
The two are still at the brusk's confession.
“Neteyam. Y/n may not be…the most comfortable with everyone but she’s not afraid of you-“
“Yes she is.”
Neteyam cuts her off.
His tone is defeated and blank.
Acceptance is an essential part of grief.
“Neteyam….”
“Doesn’t she know I would do anything for her?
I would steal the night sky for her. I’d make the whole world become a shadow so she doesn’t feel so alone-
It shut myself away so that she has nothing to fear. I’d never draw another breath again if it meant she’d smile.
It’s beyond precious. It’s beyond anything I can describe, sister-“
Kiri’s mind struggled to keep pace with the maddening reality of Neteyam’s violently clashing sentiments.
It hits Kiri.
“You love her.”
“Sister, I worship her.
There must be something wrong with me.
I swear the stars envy her.”
Kiri and him sit for a moment.
“You asked me if the sun and a shadow can fall in love?
Do you remember what norm told us?
Moonlight doesn’t exist. Moonlight is reflected by the sun.
When the world becomes a shadow, the sun provides what little light it can to the darkness so it doesn’t fall pitch black.
She dwells in the dark? Give to her what you already provide.”
“And what is that?”
“Light.”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
“Should have just let me fuck him up.”
You groan at Lo’ak’s words.
You, Lo’ak, and spider were weaving a chain of leaves and branches for a hunt festival later that night.
Y/n didn’t like large crowds. She fared better with her two idiots, much to the dismay of other na’vi in the clan.
Spider snickers.
“Maybe if your little boyfriend showed up, he could have swept you off your feet and protected you.”
You roll your eyes.
“Neteyam was probably busy helping Kiri. He probably didn’t hear his maiden’s cry for help.”
Lo’ak and Spider both cackle.
“You two think you're funny? I don’t need neteyam to come defend me.
And he’s not my boyfriend.”
Lo’ak gasps dramatically.
Then he chuckles.
“Listen sis. Our existence is the height of hilarity.
You're just mad that neteyam didn’t come and tell Kxa’nan off.
By the way, Can we get a thank you?
We saved your ass back there.”
It’s roll your eyes, shoving Lo’ak, with a small mumbled ‘thank you’.
“Y/n? Can I get some help?”
Jake comes into view, tapping you on the shoulder.
You stand, following him back to the family marui.
You find yourself helping Jake repair a human object called a ‘radio’.
It played music and could record things as well.
Jake and Neytiri have a tradition. They’d dance the human way at a festival, out of sight from others.
You found it beautiful, really.
You didn’t have parents of your own to witness a growing relationship between. But watching Jake and Neytiri was far more interesting.
Jake seemed to notice how quiet you were.
And not as quiet as usual.
To the surprise of many, you cling to Jake more than you did Neytiri as a child.
Not to say neytiri wasn’t able to take care of Y/n.
Neytiri adored Y/n. Considered her a 3rd daughter.
And well, she was the closest thing to a mom y/n would have after her own mothers death.
It was different with Jake.
Y/n has some flashes of memory with her biological mother.
With Tsu’tey? She had none.
Neytiri found herself in a place that once already held a shadow.
Meanwhile, Hake had to make his own shadow.
Reflections and reality, gentle whispers and ruffling her hair, Jake was gentle as he could be.
He considered Y/n and Lo’ak like twins solely because of their separation anxiety as children.
y/ns shadow and Lo’ak’s fire was a constant contrast in Jake’s life.
Jake would pick her up, rest her in the crook of his elbow; whisper small, gentle things.
Jake was much more protective and diligent over Y/n.
He always thought she saw the world much larger than his other children did.
Jake realized Y/n liked flowers and plants because they were easily satisfied with company.
They aren’t people. She didn’t have to raise her voice or embed herself in a state of stillness.
Jake heard the whispers.
“Does she even speak?”
“She’s a bit old to be hiding like that.”
“Maybe she’d like to play with my child-“
Rueful pesky whispers. That’s all he heard.
Jake didn’t speak. He didn’t raise his voice or even make a sound.
He places his hand on her shoulder, rubbing his hand up and down her back like that day all those years ago under the shade.
Jake would always be your shade.
Your sanctuary for your shadow.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
The festival raged on below.
You were currently a bundle of nerves as it is.
You had lost Spider and Lo’ak in the crowd and retreated to one of the higher hills to search for them.
You'd think plucking them out of a sea of faces would be second nature, but no, your boys fancied the self of one-sided hide-and-go-seek.
Spider and Lo’ak were your clouds. The radical rebellion within a rain storm. And as you tried to dish out a shimmering reflection off of spiders mask that protected him from the unwelcoming atmosphere of the jungle, the sky grew darker and darker. Laughter run through the air, the fire accentuating features of those who danced with the flames and sang with the embers.
You didn’t hate people. That was a common misconception about you.
You preferred plants to people, because one didn’t talk nearly as much as the other, and the stories within the roots and water, droplets weren’t as near as overbearing as the burdening shrills of overbearing questions. I’m nights like these were the clan gathered in large groups you would sit alone in a tree with Spider and Lo’ak. You talked about everything you were going to do the secret and stars were going to steal for one another.
On occasion, you talked to Spider about Neteyam.
How do you fear this barricaded wall you’ve built around yourself was going to turn into something he could never climb. That may be this archer you dreamed of was simply out of your grasp. You dreamed of him as the sky struck midnight in the colors in the clouds, concealing the world of a shadow you dwelled in.
Spider and Lo’ak made hesitance and patience deem itself as something worth only for baiting you into good behavior. That he would slip from your grass, that your life with slip away in a blink if you didn’t go and kiss him as the mere second.
Nights were filled of him.
His eyes, a paradox of the golden hour. His strong figures sculpted like mountains, his words that painted the sky in the sea.
He wondered if he tasted like sunlight and wind, if his lips were as gently roughed-edged and honed as his voice.
Or if when you touched him, the last salvageable stretches of the sunset would disappear under your lips. And you would return to recycled versions of his lingering touches..
You loved him. You truly, truly loved him.
And what would the sullys think? His parents? His siblings?
You owed everything to them.
They didn’t have to take you in after your mother passed.
Lo’ak was your fire. Neteyam was your sun. Kiri was your Venus. Tuk was your star. Jake was your wind. Neytiri was your mountain. Spider was your cloud.
But you? You were a shadow.
Finding your voice became more difficult as a child.
This shyness, this shadow, this ‘anxiety’ as Jake called it.
This thing. This monster.
Made out of shadows and secrets and pesky loud whispers.
It’s tall with limbs like sticks.
It’s chained to your wrist like an unwanted prisoner.
It sends strokes of dread down your back.
And it haunted you.
When you longed for Neteyam, but this chain around your wrist kept its barricade of darkness.
Even as a child.
You were a little voice who others assumed only cried for help.
When you tugged on Neytiri’s waistband, gently signaling you were uncomfortable, when you hid behind Jake’s leg from prying eyes.
How a small Lo’ak followed you around, looked at you like you held the universe in your hands, you were his big sister. How you chewed on your lower lip, nervously holding Jake’s hand while Lo’ak clung to your arm.
How his fire and your shadow caused a collision within the Sully family, beautifully inharmonious chaos.
You loved Lo’ak. But Lo’ak was your brother.
The closest thing you would have to a brother in this lifetime.
You longed for Neteyams sunlight.
You were a shadow.
Shadows didn’t belong in the light.
Much less to fall in love with it.
To lay beneath his soul, to feel the connection. It’ll always be there. Casting a shadow.
A starless night.
Oh how you longed for moonlight.
You peered down below, your gaze tugged away from your mission to find your two idiots.
You're lost in the beauty of the Omaticaya, people danced in their traditional garb, the drums ruminate through the thick air, and you swore it was the heartbeats of your people.
The fire and the night sky was a beautiful collision dancing off of azure skin.
Then. The rain returns.
“Y/n? Whatcha doing here all alone?”
No. No no no no no.
You whip around to see Kxa’nan.
Your breath leaves you in a soft surge of panic.
“You're always alone. I barely ever hear you talk, yawne. Need some company?”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
Neteyam was helping his dad cook the fish he hunted earlier over the fire, Neytiri and Kiri assisting with the spices and herbs.
Lo’ak was missing from the picture, nowhere to be seen the whole night since the celebration started.
“Where is your brother?
Neytiri asked, letting Tuk perch herself in her former spot next to Jake.
“You haven’t seen him?”
Neteyams eyebrows raise.
“Was he with Y/n and spider?”
Tuk lifts her head over Jake’s shoulder.
Neytiri, more than displeased at the mention of the human boy, but concern for Lo’ak and protectiveness over Y/m arose.
“Was she with the sky boy and Lo’ak earlier? They went with the foraging group today-
Tuktirey. Stop poking at the dead fish.”
“Sorry mama.”
As if on cue, Lo’ak and spider entered the small tent.
“Lo’ak!”
Neytiri placed her hand on her son’s shoulder.
He was out of breath, looked like he just ran around the entire forest.
“Where’s Y/n?”
He asked in a short gasp.
Jake, now concerned stood to his feet.
“Y/n? Where did you come from, Lo’ak?”
“The festival? I dunno-
I can’t find her. And she hates big crowds like these. Spider had to go back to the lab to get a new mask on short notice, there’s no one with her.”
Tuk giggles.
“Lo’ak was probably too busy dancing with a girl…”
Jake’s eyebrows crinkled.
Neteyam stood at his feet as well.
He left the tent and set off to find you.
He searched the celebration, pushed past the embers and smoke, the thick air of peoples dancing and the sounds of laughter.
On a hill, a little ways off. Two shadows come into view.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
“Kxa’nan..I wish to be alone.”
Kxa’nan groaned at your words.
“Your’e always alone, or you’re hanging out with those two freaks.”
Your shadow dissipates for a moment, anger simmered beneath your skin.
“Lo’ak and Spider aren’t freaks-
don’t talk about them like that.”
Kxa’nan scoffs and your left unhooded with no shadow at all for a moment.
“Don’t laugh. You’re the one always having a pissing race with Neteyam.
Maybe if you aimed your arrow as good as you flexed your non-existent muscles, there’d be nothing to say.”
He hissed at you and grabbed your arm. Being compared to Neteyam was a jab.
A small wince contorted your features, you gasped.
A flash of lights invades both your visions, and a strong arm is wrapped around your waist, a familiar touch, a circle of safety.
A familiar azure skinned archer appears beside you, a protective shield of a glare at Kxa’nan.
“Don’t touch her. Ever. Again.”
Kxa’nan scoffs, but a fortification of fear embeds itself In his eyes. Clearly intimidated by Neteyam’s presence.
Kxa’nan glares at you, unhappy with your savior and his impeccable timing.
His eyes flare yellow. Not a soft golden hour like Neteyam’s. No, and even in a clan where all your eyes share the same tint. At the moment this is a sickening shade of yellow. It flares so brightly you thin your eyes to look away. Your breath hitches in your throat and your voice hides behind the threat of thought.
Neteyam takes a step forward and pushes him away, shielding you from his gaze.
His deep voice honed itself as a rougher edge.
“Don’t look at her.
Look at me.
Don’t come near her again. Got it?”
Lo’ak and spider come into view from behind a few trees.
“Hey! Get away from them. Back it up!”
Spider’s small figure appears much less intimidating then the Sully brothers. But he remains grounded to protect you.
“What the fuck did I tell you?”
Lo’ak grab’s Kxa’nan by his bicep roughly.
“Don’t bother her. And what did you do?”
Kxa’nan glares at you and your four tyrants.
“Y/n, did you really have to bring this whole freak show family with you?”
He bites.
There’s a beat of silence.
And then, Lo’aks fist collides with Kxa’nan’s jaw, hot, red liquid pools from his mouth.
“It’s called a punch, Bitch! Don’t ever touch my sister again.”
Kxa’nan tackles Lo’ak, and Spider body slams the Na’vi.
Tapping his elbow before placing his other hand on his bicep and flinging himself, jabbing Kxa’nan in the ribs with his elbow.
Jake emerged from a few trees away, groaning and trying to grab his son before shit actually got heavy.
Jake places a lingering touch on your arm to make sure you were safe,
Jake drags Lo’ak up by his arm, grabbing spider by his waist.
Spider explains the predicament, and Jake angrily drags Kxa’nan away to be dealt with.
No one messes with his kids.
Lo’ak wiggles his eyebrows at Neteyam, who’s held you close to him this whole time.
And then.
You’re alone.
Neteyam turns to you, his fingers dragging down your cheeks gently.
“Are you alright? Did he hurt you? Talk to me, please..”
Gently cradling your face in the cup of his palms.
A fire alights beneath your skin.
“I’m fine, Nete…he just made me…uncomfortable..”
There’s silence. 7 beats worth.
“How long has he been bothering you?”
Your voice peaks from behind your barricade.
“Awhile…”
“You never came to me, you never told me. Y/n I will always protect you. Why didn’t you come to me?”
His voice was a labyrinth of desperation clinging to hope.
“I’m sorry..”
It’s a small fragile whisper.
And most protect fragile things.
Neteyam gently drags his hands down your neck, another hand gently tracing your rib cage.
“I don’t want an apology. I want you to know that I care for you. So deeply, Y/n.”
Is there another universe out there where I can spare you the pain of love?
Longing for someone so desperately you fear they’ll become aflame under your touch.
Does he taste like fire?
Is the plush of your skin sculpted from shadows?
This love was a painting you never had the courage to count the colors, in fear they would flurry away.
In this fortress of his arms, in this circle of sunlight, in this last surviving stretch of a sunset, there’s a flare.
Neteyam gives to others only to deny himself.
You reach for something made of glass only to see it shatter again.
But not here.
Not now.
You whisper hoarsely as his hands cradle your face.
“I don’t like big crowds.”
He smiles and kisses your nose.
“Then neither do I.”
The two of you sit there, under the canopy of the trees, watching the stars.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
Your head laid on his chest, the only music you two needed was the sound of your intertwining heartbeats.
You traced the lines on his palms, and he kissed your cheek.
Soft whispers and lingering gazes.
“What’s your favorite star?”
You ask him.
You.
He wants to say, but he holds his tounge. Eyes scanning the sky for the perfect star to satisfy your curiosity.
“That one.”
He points to one, it’s in the midst of a cluster of scattered flurries of white specks.
You leaned into his shoulder, his hand gently cupping the back of your head.
“What would happen if they started falling?”
“I’d catch them for you.”
You chuckled at his answer.
He closes his eyes and basks in the aubade of your laughter.
Your soul, gentle semblances of beauty in the space behind the sun.
Love is a sacrificial abstraction. He sees you in signposts and circles, and parallel lines.
Another beat of silence passes.
“Y/n.”
He breaths your name, dragging his finger along your pulse point.
You hear music in the distance.
Not the drums of the Omaticaya, or the flutes of your people.
You peer down over the hill and see two figures slow dancing to a radio in the family Marui.
Neytiris giggles are gently heard as the silhouette of her and Jake dancing comes into view.
You sighed in contentment. Sometimes, you, Neteyam, Kiri and Lo’ak would spy on them behind the tent flap. Observing them dance, Jake teaching her the way people dance on earth.
Neteyam smiles as well.
“I love it when they do that…”
You lean into his shoulder, and he finds himself lost in your eyes once again.
He wishes he could give you the whole world. A place where you can disregard burdens of reality, be tangled with her pages and plants, gardens made of clouds, and laughter, where you can trace the in patterns of her favorite flower, where you can touch the consolation within isolation. It is not loneliness you desire, you don't want the fixation of the introspection within your shadow.
Neteyam stands you both to your feet, Jake’s music dwells in the night air, the stars seem to twinkle in perfect rhythm.
“Neteyam, what are we doing?”
You laugh.
“Dancing, come yawne.
Put your hands here, and my hand goes-“
He pauses before placing his hand on your lower waist, just like he saw his father do.
“May I?”
You nod.
Before you can blink, he sways you with the music, you laugh and avoid stepping on his toes
For a moment, the shadows disappear. The sun burns out. It’s no longer so bright you are forced to shy away to the dark.
Custom, reason, temptation, it all fades behind the stars.
The moonlight traces his figure as you dance, the stars reminisce in your eyes.
You were composed of stories.
Captivating, euphonious stories.
The same stories that you cradled in your pals when you held your plants.
Your souls dance but your gazes remain still.
He gently cups your face in his hands, lifting your chin.
“I see you, Y/n. I have never seen anyone but you, beautiful…”
Your breath hitches.
“I see you, Neteyam. I’ve always seen you..”
When you kiss him, the shadows and the sunlight collide, and soft gasps and and tangible emotions are torn.
There is no barricade.
The distance was only ever created because distance was safe.
But you don’t want distance.
Neither does he.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
He lays you down on the soft bed of grass, he yearns to kiss every inch of you from your hairline to your ankles.
“Y/n, oh my Y/n…my beautiful, beautiful y/n.”
He whispers your name like a mantra, as if you would wither away into the shadows again if he didn’t pray your name.
Your gasps serenaded him.
Your hands tugged on his braids as he kissed your neck,
“What do you wish for me to do, yawne? Speak for me, my good girl..”
Your leg wrapped around his hip. You couldn’t help but buck into him.
Love like this only haunts you with light that once existed behind the shadow, the one that surfaced behind the sun.
Eclipse is near.
He unraveled you like the universe was beneath your top and loincloth, stroking you with gentle drags of his thumb, his strong arm hooked under your thigh.
“Neteyam-
Eywa please…”
You begged for him to soothe the aching heat
“Shhh. It’s okay, my sweet girl. I’m right here…just keep looking up at those pretty stars. The stars are yours, my love,
Fuck-
Everything, the sky, the sun, the oceans, the shadows they’re all yours, my love. So am I.”
He reached around for his braid and you followed suit.
You both stared into eachothers eyes. The pools of honeyed golden hour beneath the moon.
The sweet nectar dripping down your thighs, your curves traced by his touch,
“Tsaheylu, Neteyam..please.”
Who was he to deny you?
And as you connected the stars fell.
A flurry of colors, a blur of ecstasy, straddled, kissed, caressed, explored.
The drapes of the moonlight bathing you.
Every coherent thought withered into a static of white,
This wasn’t sex. This wasn’t one body entering another for pleasure. This was a soul finding it’s flame.
He begged the deity to never take his shadow away.
“Do you feel it y/n, it’s always been there..I’ve always been here..don’t hide from me again.”
His rough accent voice honed your ears, his nose dragging along your pulse point, you whined in response.
The heat faded away, tranquility returned.
He kissed you, your chin, your lips, your hair, thank you’s and praises whispered as his string arms encircled you.
You laid on his chest, and you faintly hear him whisper
“I think it’s finally eclipse…”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
-Sunofpandora
2023
“Diaphanous”
Tag list:
@neteyamsoare
@yeosxxx
@lianna75
@jackiehollanderr
@6423btw
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
Im SCREAMING right now.
Im super insecure in writing smut but i kinda wanted to try it? It's not really smut tbh just like…really intimate?
Idk.
But I struggled with this fr. Writers block ate me up.
So idk how good this is. Sorry 😭
I hope everyone enjoyed. That request box is gonna be open in the next few weeks but I might be a bit busy so there might be a bit of a wait.
I wanted to include some parallels from the movie, and some references to Jake and Neytiri through Neteyam and Y/n, so I hope everyone caught those.
I hoped you enjoyed “diaphanous” 🌀🪐
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The perks of injuries : Morpheus x reader
Request: Reader is able to enter the dreaming physically, not just while asleep. Time pass, she starts to feel comfortable around lord and acting like they're friends (she thinks they really are, but we know Dream and his "I don't need anyone"). One day something awful happened, maybe reader was being followed in the night on her way home or some natural disaster appeared, so she went to the dreaming out of fear, but Morpheus being his moody self with a lot of work thought she would just get on his nerves or something like this and just sent her back to earth, maybe with saying about her being too loud/clingy for him to normally work. In the real world she got badly hurt and the only person who helped her out was Hob/Matthew/Death. The same day or the next dream found out about it from her saver (if it's hob maybe during their meeting which was due the same day everything happened, matthew when he came back, death when she was just passing by his realm). Ending with guilty, comforting Morpheus.
Oh, hello there. I haven’t seen you lurking in the shadows.
I don’t think we’ve meet before so let me introduce myself. In this story my name is irrelevant and it’s better if you only know me by my function. I am the spirit, that little spark that lives inside every human and stays there even after people die. Of course, I am dressed in human form but you should not be tricked with that outside.
Because of my purpose and abilities, during my lifetime I have already met a lot of different creatures, god, embodiments of human believes. Funny how their faith and imagination brings all of them to life and keep them that way.
The Endless are the ones I have to work with most of the time. I already mentioned Death – surprisingly she is the sweetest girl you have ever met, full of optimism and joy but there are another 6 of them. Destiny, Destruction, Desire, Despair, Delirium and Dream. I purposefully left Dream at the end since I have the strongest relation with him. He rules the sleeping domain, but even when people dream their spirit stay active so it’s my job to ensure nightmares or dreams do not become too vivid. It’s my duty to watch over them all the time, much to Dream’s displeasure.
Despite his attitude during the years we were able to make this relation work without interfering too much with one another and that required my presence in the Dreaming from time to time to check out if everything was going smoothly. Therefore I was granted the ability to project myself in his Kingdom not only while sleeping (since I was still a lot like human) but also in my psychical form. At some point I started considering Dream as my friend, but he was far more reserved with the use of such word.
***
It was heavy day. October mood started to settle in and people were slowly indulging in their autumn sadness, sleepiness and weariness. Focusing only on the most important things, rarely leaving homes and spending days in front of TV, tucked in blankets. Lack of sun and happiness could be felt by everyone and Despair slowly started to pull her claws on those who were prone to seasonal mood swings and depression. I would lie if I said it all had no effect on their spirits and in result – on me. I was losing energy and focus and motivation to do anything and it was not good. Definitely not. Despite my best efforts I felt all the emotions and instead of acting like a spiritual being I was behaving like human. Which also meant I was more vulnerable than usual.
“Heading home?” my friend from work stopped by my desk on her way out, worry all over her face
“Sorry?” I raised my head from the pile of documents, not sure of the day or even the hour
“It’s late” she said “you should finish for today. You have been working too hard lately.”
“Yeah, maybe you are right” how could I even begin to explain that work helped me get my mind busy. And being a scientist required constant focus on the experiment and researches so it really helped “but you know how it is, if you don’t keep up the pace you will be left behind and we don’t want another team to outrun us, do we?”
“Nope. But we also don’t want a member of the team to die on the shift, so try to remember that. Team, right, we are all in this together so no reason to act like a martyr.”
“I don’t….” I started but she cut me off
‘You do. I don’t know what’s been going on with you lately, but something’s different.”
“Must be the weather.” I smiled innocently not revealing the true reason behind it all.
“Right. Lame excuse. Go home. I’ll see you tomorrow” she fastened the belt and I waved her goodbye.
Honestly, deep inside I knew she was right. It was almost 7 p.m., the streets were dark and deserted and I was in need of rest. Even if I hated it. Reluctantly I stood up, turned off the lights, closed the door and started walking home. But as soon as I stepped out of the office I felt something was wrong. Seemingly quiet and dimly lit street, instead of radiating calmness and peacefulness was eerie and terrifying. I felt it in the pit of my stomach and my heart instantly started beating faster. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a coward and I’ve seen a lot of dark, scary things inside humans souls, but this…. This feeling was something different. Something more primal, carnal and definitely not coming from Earth.
“Come out now, show yourself!” I spun around searching for the threat. Yes, I know I’ve learned nothing from the horror movies. I should have run the other direction instead of walking straight into the arms of it. “Are you chickening out now?” I mocked, using all the efforts to make my voice sound firm and confident.
There was no response but the lights flickered slightly and out of nowhere the wind broke off.
“Oh, great” I mumbled “someone needs some demonstration of powers. Why not bring the earthquake or a hurricane.”
“If you wish so, I can make it happen.“
“Desire” I hissed while spotting black-dressed, thin and high figure moving in front of me “are you alone this time?”
“Hello, spirit. Despair sends her regards, but she could not visit this time.”
“Such a shame.” I pouted “but her presence seem to be …. Pervasive, lately. I suppose she is in high spirits?”
“My dear, you can’t even imagine.” Desire purred “and what brings her the most pleasure is you suffering because of your beloved humanity.”
“I bet it is” I groaned as a sharp sting run through my stomach “do you have a business with me, Desire? It’s not often I see you in the Waking.”
“This is an exception from a rule. I know you’ve been suffering lately and I came for the aid.”
“Aid?” I raised an eyebrow “Did you bump your head, Desire?”
“You misunderstood me. My aid is more like ending your suffering”
“I don’t suffer” I folded over in sudden pain and started catching my breath rapidly.
“Liar” Desire put on the widest smile and took a step forward
“What are you doing to me?” I was now kneeling on the ground, feeling worse and worse with its proximity.
“You should know better, spirit. Desire is something that is detrimental to the …. Metaphysical aspects of human existence. Don’t you ever read any religious texts?”
“I know them too well, actually” I gasped
“Good. Then you will know what is coming next for you” Desire popped a squat next to me and grabbed my chin forcefully causing me to look at them. “You are going to suffer, a lot. I will make you beg for …..”
“Why?” I groaned trying to yank myself.
“Because you are a nuisance. You make people better, more noble and gentle. I don’t like that.”
I hissed in pain once again, not able to hold it back.
“Yes.” Desire purred full of vengeful satisfaction “ it hurts, doesn’t it? And there is nowhere to run.”
“That’s where you are wrong, Desire” I looked them straight into the eyes, sudden crazy though popping inside my mind.
“What? What are you talking about?” their smile slightly dropped
“Goodbye, Desire. I would say it was a pleasure to meet you, but as you know I am not the best liar in the world” I said and hissing and pain gathered all my power to transport myself to the only place that could possibly ensure my safety from one of the Endless.
***
The portal I opened was so powerful that it made me lose my balance and fell onto the sandy shore by the Dreaming’s gate. Coughing and panting I used my hand for support before my head got injured due to the impact.
“Shit! Shit, shit!” I really hoped I would be able to get straight into the castle but apparently the stress influenced my focus. Even though I was safe now and Desire could not get me here without invitation to Dream’s realm (which was never happening) I jumped and rushed towards the entry. “Please, open up” I put a hand where normally the doorknob would be and whispered silent pleas. I was lucky enough to made it move, in painfully slow and glitzy way. I was not patient enough to wait and slipped through the gap running towards the palace.
“Dream!” I panted running straight into the throne room catching my breath
“Spirit.” His cold voice made me straighten up immediately to safe the rests of the dignity, but my messy hair and reddened face did nothing to help me. “Why are you here?”
“Oh, you know, I was just nearby and decided to pay you a visit.”
“You were not invited. Your unexpected visitations are becoming a bother to the Kingdom”
“Morpheus ….” that was painful “you surely don’t mean that…..”
“What seems to be the matter this time?” he raised his gaze and looked at my messy figure. “Did something happen?” the last question was barely a show of acknowledgement more
“Yeah, just your sibling came at me trying to destroy my inner peace. No biggie.” I fixed a single strand of hair trying to give shaking hands something to hold on to.
“Desire?”
“Who else?”
“I shall deal with my sibling soon then, if you were not able to do so. Anything else?”
“Yes, actually” I started fiddling with my fingers nervously
“What is it?” the way he was towering over me made me feel weak an completely at his mercy. As much as I hated begging there was no other option.
“Please, don’t make me go back to waking. At least not straight away. Let me stay, Morpheus”
“I’m busy, spirit. I don’t have time for that. And I see no reason to do so. “
“You know well enough I have no power against Desire, Morpheus and if they are after me, Waking is not safe. I’m really scared, please. I thought as my friend you would help me.” Oh, forget the dignity, fear got the worst of me.
“Waking is your realm and you should go back there immediately. Dreaming has its own affairs and it’s not a hideout for you, spirit. Go back to your Realm, protect it and I will take of Desire after I’m done with my duties.”
“Morpheus, please…. I….”
“That’s all, Spirit.”
“Fine. Thanks for your help, Dream. Hope everything works well for you here. I suppose I see you when there’s another vortex or some other threat to your Kingdom. You never had any inhibitions to ask for my help."
I marched out the palace and with still shaking hands returned to the same place in the Waking. Luckily, Desire was out of sight, for now, but knowing them, this was far from over.
***
I had a sleepless night. After my little banter with Morpheus no dream came to me and obviously I did not even enter the Dreaming. He was either acting like a child or was truly busy with some serious and urgent matter, most probably both those reason combined. So when the morning came I was even more tired than before. And there was one more thing, just a little something that normally would not get my attention but since I knew that I was on Desire’s radar I was far more alert. I was becoming paranoid and there was no way I could go to work like that, so the only option was to call in and excuse myself with being sick. The last thing I needed was ending up in the mental hospital or someone discovering my true identity. Muttering some protective spell I walked round the apartment searching for the source of something dark and evil I could clearly feel. It was not Desire, for sure. This was more… infernal, cruel and well, less sly than Dream’s sibling. Suddenly, the though dawned on me. They send a demon after me. The worst kind of the Hell’s servant, known as Hellfire. Talk about a threat to a spirit. This one could crash me with a single snap of his fingers.
“Spirit.” he spoke contently “such a pleasure”
“I did not expect you in my flat.” I trembled “what brings you to me?”
“A debt to Desire. Seems like today I will finally be able to pay it.”
“I’m not going down willingly.” I raised hand creating some sort of shield between us
“Funny, I was not asking” he looked at me and I felt this kind of pain that really make you wanna give up and die. My whole body was on fire, my insides being twisted and turned and I could only see the blackness. My light and soul power was still there, but it was not enough to go against the demon. Darkness slowly started to creep in, every positive though I had gone and suppressed by negativity, sadness, evil. There was no good in the world, people were ungrateful, greedy creatures, life was meaningless.
“Death….” I whispered faintly before losing conscience and giving in to the devilish powers.
***
When I opened my eyes I was lying under cover, the demon gone and my flat looking like nothing happened. Was that a dream? But why would Morpheus allow something like that? Was he really that mad at me for seeking his help? I tried to move but my whole body was aching and even breathing was problematic. I also felt some pressure on my abdomen and after lifting up the shirt I discovered some dressing across my stomach.
“Who’s here?” I screamed at the space once again alerted. I was in no condition to fight but I would if I had to.
“Hey, no! Lay back down” black-skinned woman came running off the kitchen forcing me back onto the cushions. “You got pretty badly hurt, dear. You need rest.”
“Hello, Death” I closed my eyes, enjoying her warm hand on my forehead “What happened?”
“How much do you remember?”
“I remember Hellfire coming after me. “
“That is not something you can forget" she muttered” you called for me and that was good decision.”
“Guess my human instincts kicked in. Thank you. Amongst the Endless you are the only one I can count on.”
“How so?” she raised an eyebrow “Actually, wait. I was a bit surprised when I heard your voice. I mean, usually you are rather more fond of collaborating with my brother, so why me?”
“I did ask Dream for help, but he….”
“Wait.” She raised hand stopping me from talking “He denied you?”
“He was busy.”
“He is always busy. And his affairs are usually about him sulking and going through something. I love my brother, but he is an idiot. This could have ended up so bad….” She shook her head and the curly hair bounced around emphasizing her annoyance. “Did you tell him Desire was after you?”
“How do you know that?” I propped myself on the elbow but the injuries made me fall back hissing. “Shit!”
“It does not take a genius. Only Desire would send a demon after you. unless you also have some affair with Morningstar I should know about?” I shook my head denying that “Good. But Dream…., I think I will need a word with him.”
“The boss is already on his way. Will you let me in?” familiar Raven perched down on the sill looking through the raked window.
“Sure, come on in, Matthew” I sighed reaching for the handle and letting him in.
“Are you all right?”
“Besides dizziness, third-degree burns and scarred pride I think I will pull through. Not thanks to Dream, though. “
“He is ……” Matthew started but quickly stopped
“Do not speak in my name Matthew.”
“Oh, hello brother. Seems like you and I have a lot to talk about” Death smiled at her younger sibling appearing in the room, but tone of her voice was far from happy, rather reprobative.
“Guys” I captured their attention “as much as I appreciate you all coming here, can a girl get some peace and calm to heal? You know, you don’t confront a demon every day. Death, thank you for your help, truly, but can you and your brother get your little fight somewhere else?”
Death eyed her brother carefully while he was hunched, his gaze focused on the floor.
“Sure” she shrugged “you need peace, you are right. But I think Dream might have something to tell you, so I’ll leave you two alone. Matthew, care to join me outside?”
“Sure thing, Lady Death.”
“We will have this conversation, brother, just later. What comes up must go down” she went to hug him and whispered into his ear “tell her!” then the older endless turned back to me, still in bed “see you soon, dear, take care of yourself and if you ever need something don’t hesitate to call me. Bye.”
Without her presence the atmosphere in the room suddenly became more tense. Dream was standing in the same position, his feet rooted to the ground, while I was just biting my lip and trying to look everywhere but on him. Awkward.
“Dream…..” I spoke
“Spirit……” he said at the same time and this made us silent once again.
Finally, after what seemed like eternity he came closer and sat down on the edge of the couch making me move away instantly.
“Please, don’t” he whispered
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t …. Run from me.”
“Run from you?! Are you serious Dream? I run straight into you when I felt the danger coming. And what was your response? I am busy. Isn’t that what you said?” the anger and hurt found the way out at last.
“I did….I…..I….” he stuttered
“What?”
“I apologize, spirit. I should have taken you seriously.”
“You should have.” I agreed looking away, still hurt. “Well, apologies accepted I guess.”
“No.” he grabbed my hand gently
“No? I don’t understand.”
“You should be mad. You should scream and shout and call me an idiot. But you are just too good for me, aren’t you?” he searched for my face and as our gazes met I finally came into realization
“Morpheus?” I coughed out “what are you…..”
“When you came to me…. I panicked. You make me…. Feel things and that is something I haven’t experienced in some time. “
“Is that bad?”
“It’s dangerous. Every woman I loved, every feeling I held for anyone always ended up badly.”
“Loved?” I opened my eyes in surprise “Dream…..”
“Yes. It’s true. I love you, spirit. And now I feel so guilty for letting you get hurt. And ‘m terrified for your safety. We still have joint affairs and business and I don’t know if I can keep it up like that. Maybe it would be better and safer for you with me gone”
“Shut up, Morpheus!” I interrupted his teary confession unable to take it anymore. “Your sister is right, you are an idiot. Why do you think I came to you in the first place? Why do you think I project myself in the Dreaming every time I get the chance? Why do you think I meddled with humans mentality so they would get your attention and you would come to me for change. Did you believe it all to be coincidental?”
“I…” oh, now he was speechless “I never ....”
“Well, now you know.” I looked down, my cheek turning red. “It’s your decision what to do with it. You can leave but you can…. you know, stay.”
“My love” he whispered and before I realized what was happening he was kissing me gently and mindful of all the injuries “I am sorry. I’ll stay with you as long as you’ll have me.”
“Then you are up for a long ride. But I believe you have a word to exchange with your sister first.”
“She can wait” he whispered moving in once again but I stopped him by putting hand on his chest.
“She cannot. Before this gets serious you need some sense knocked into your head. Go talk to her and be quick. You made me wait for you long enough.”
“Anything for you, love. “ he kissed my temple and reluctantly, yet obediently left to be scolded by Death.
@somest1 @pinksirensong
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