#but everyone else is so 'whatever' about nathan dying

[immortalled]

ahh. i love nathan. i love his asbo friends.

but also i wish someone would tell him his asbo friends are kind of crappy to him sometimes. i don't think he realizes that.

...not... that nathan isn't also equally crappy. but it's kind of interesting to me that some people call nathan a sociopath (he's not) because he "doesn't care about anyone but himself" (he does) when honestly?? he seems a lot more worried about his friends 80% of the time than they're worried about him once they learn he's immortal.

like. yeah, that's not really fair to them. they obviously love him a lot. but it always bothers me how flippant they are about him dying after the first time (with the exception of that one time brian put nathan into a coma).

idk, just the lack of acknowledgement that dying is still a very unpleasant process for nathan makes me a little sad.

[aledethanlast]

Okay but like if you think about it, Neil's surviving Baltimore isn't all pure luck. That is to say, it's only 30% luck. The other 70% is everyone else involved in that catastrophe royally fucking up, jumping the gun, or being generally bad at their jobs.

Like, Nathan gets out of prison, and priority 1 is to reestablish his presence as fast as possible. He needs to prove to Kengo that he's still in the game and doesn't need to be replaced with someone who doesn't get caught.

Except Kengo is dying. Hiding it, but definitely dying. Meaning his comeback has a VERY short deadline.

And then Riko, who has been running around using yakuza resources for personal grudges unchecked, hands him his son on a silver platter. Christmas come late.

And then...he waits? I can only assume Nathan spends two months tormenting Neil with that countdown because that was the earliest he could orchestrate a meeting with both Kengo and Ichirou, where he intended to present Nathaniel's severed head on a literal silver platter, and thus prove his worth to his old boss, and secure his favor with the incoming.

Except knowing that the feds were watching the house apparently didn't extend to knowing that they HIRED HIS BROTHER IN LAW TO KILL HIM CIA STYLE.

(Which also??? Hello???)

Well they do that, and don't even realize that Nathan didn't put up a fight because he was busy trying to kill the best witness against him until the guy physically walks up to them and says so. And then the gjy starts being contrarian and they guy huffy but whatever. That's a minor problem for them. Their big concern is closing this case in a nice bow without the DoJ ever finding out what they did. Or worse, the press.

Meanwhile...the Moriyamas. We have only the tiniest glimpse of what was happening inside that family, but I am sure of one thing: Ichirou's ascension to the throne was NOT a peaceful transition of power. Kengo refusing to step away gracefully, covering up hospitalizations, he likely held on to power until the very last second, denying his son the time and space to secure the loyalty of their generals in advance.

So now Kengo is dead, right-hand man not only gone but his network ripped apart by carrion, and he needs to cauterize every bleeding limb before he's caught, challenged, or deposed. He is PANICKING.

By the time he gets to Palmetto, and Neil says "Don't look at me, I'm the one person in this fiasco who knows their place", Ichirous internal response is little more than "Oh thank God."

[nipperlovesfenix]

I'm sad about Lisa.

I'm sad about Aunt Cat and Uncle Dan.

I'm sad about the concept of family.

Taylor doesn't want to see his family for Easter. I get it. I hate that I don't have a family to give him. I want to be loved and accepted by his family in a way I'm sure is unrealistic. I'm definitely idealizing the concept of (his) family. I want a family. I want a big family.

My family is so fucking fractured. Nathan is a sexual predator, Rachel is just...who even the fuck knows. Keenan is so staunch in his beliefs that he is extremely unpleasant to talk to. I blocked him because I never, ever felt good after talking to him. Gross ass energy. Aunt Judy is a fucking lunatic and mean as hell. I wish it was different. Uncle Dave is happy and I'm so happy for him. I'm glad he left her. Brock is miserable and mean and was weird at the end. He's been weird throughout but especially at the end. I miss the girls. Aunt Cat is...well, it is what it is. Anything I tell her will get to everyone else. I thought we had a special relationship. I thought Dan and I did, too. Maybe he's really sick now, I don't know. It's so sad. My dad is fucking sick and my brother and him have some shit to work out karmically or whatever. Abby is weird and isn't straight forward about anything. Idk what to do about mom and grandma.

That's all I have. All these broken pieces. I have Taylor and Evren and they're the best. I wish we could be close to Taylor's family but they're fucked up too. It's not for me to try to push anything. I just want a family. Tyler dying had a huge impact on his family. Then he lost his whole mom's side. I wish it were different.

I wish they didn't live in Cleveland. Cleveland is miserable.

[derryqueenx]

Can I please request ‘bullying’ from the BTH bingo card for Baby Boosh, perhaps? Maybe Vince and Howard in high school?

Bullying.

Word Count: 4068 (back with a big one haha)

TW: Bullying (duh lol)

Send through your prompts and any Noel/Julian related characters (if you have one in mind! If not I’ll just write whatever I feel works best for said prompt) Accepting prompts for Boosh/Sweet/Nathan Barley/Noelian/Blue Song and any other thing of theirs that I’ve missed.

(Also, I have not re-read with awake eyes. I finished this at like 12am with sleepy eyes so apologies for any mistakes)

Howard didn’t have friends. That was normal.

Howard wanted friends, but no one ever wanted him. They would tease him – tell him he had a moustache, that he had germs, that he would never have a girlfriend or any friends.

It hurt.

It hurt, but he got used to it.

They were only words, after all. It’s not like the times he would get pushed into the lockers or walls, or get bags whacked into the back of his head, or when they shoved his head into the toilet.

The words he could handle. But after a while, the physical stuff started taking a toll.

He’d flinch whenever anyone approached him, and eventually just started hated people touching him all together. Which of course the bullies just made even more fun of him for.

No one ever jumped to his defence, or stood up for him, or told them to stop. He was on his own. And that’s exactly how Howard always thought he’d be.

“Alright class, we have a new student with us today. Everyone please join me in welcoming your new friend, Vince.”

The class remained silent, with only a few vague mumbles from unenthusiastic children who didn’t even bother a glance up from their books or scribbles, and even though Howard was paying attention, he didn’t speak out. He normally didn’t anyway. Just better to stay quiet and avoid any risk of something to be picked on later.

The new kid, Vince, was visually noisy. His hair was tall and fluffy, a dirty blonde colour that looked like something he’d done himself with some box hair dye over the bathroom sink. Howard wondered how his parents must have felt about their son dying his own hair? His own parents would probably murder him.

“Vince, why don’t you go sit on the desk next to Howard over there, hmm? He’s a good kid. He’ll be a good influence on you.” Mrs Bright gave Howard a gentle smile, masking the sadness behind the reason why that desk was empty, knowing it was because all the other students actively avoided him. And Howard knew it would only be a matter of time before this new kid avoided him too, just another colossal let down to Howard’s hope for friendship.

In that moment, Howard despised Mrs Bright for placing Vince next to him.

But for the next coming years and beyond, it was something he would be eternally grateful for.

Vince took his seat, tucking his hair behind his ear nervously as he bit into his lip, sparing at glance at Howard’s direction that the other kid purposely tried to ignore. He wouldn’t get his hopes up that Vince would stick around in that seat much longer.

“Alright everybody, lets turn to page 34 of your textbooks, okay?” Mrs Bright announced, turning to begin writing on the chalkboard as Howard grabbed his textbook from under his desk, doing as he was told and opening the correct page. He could see Vince out of the corner of his eye looking around the room at everyone else, seeing what they were doing, and this was when Howard realised he didn’t have his own textbook. Oh no... He thought to himself, forcing himself to stare down at the pages and keep out of sight when Mrs Bright faced the class once again.

“Oh Vince! Sorry dear. We’re out of books at the moment, but why don’t you share with Howard for now? I’m sure he wont mind, right Howard?”

Howard tried to suppress his disappointment, wincing mentally to himself as he glanced up with a shrug. “It’s fine.” He mumbled, earning a soft grin from Mrs Bright who motioned for Vince to move in close to Howard’s desk so he could see the pages. The boy did, and when Howard accidently spared a look to him, he flashed Howard the widest smile he’d ever seen.

A little taken aback by the sudden kindness, Howard’s head instantly shot back down towards the book, ignoring Vince’s smile as his focused solely on the paragraph about Native Australian Animals. He couldn’t tell the look Vince had on his face, but he tried not to care about potentially hurting the new kids feelings when he remained silent, not saying anything to Howard as he just leant closer to get a better look at the book.

“Now, class, last week we were studying up on Koala Bears. Who can remember – Uh, yes Vince?”

By his side, Vince had his hand raised, a determined look on his face. “Actually, Koala’s aren’t bears. They’re marsupials. It’s a misconception that they’re bears and they really don’t like it. Makes them quite upset.”

Mrs Bright looked as if to say something, when another student, Claude, spoke up first. “And did they tell you that, did they?” He snickered, seemingly thinking it was a clever insult.

Vince didn’t skip a beat, looking at Claude as seriously as ever. “Yeah. My dad took me to Australia on one of his tours and we went to the zoo. I met a Koala named Joe and he told me all about it.”

This time, the rest of the class snickered alongside Claude, and Howard could feel his face growing redder as he tried to sink down into the chair. They weren’t laughing at him – but it was close enough. Them looking at Vince meant they were also looking at him.

“What – you their mother or something, hey? Koala Boy? They come crying to you when they’ve had a bad day?” Claude laughed louder, and so did the class, all while Vince’s expression never change, possibly unawares that he was being made fun of.

“Well, when they find out I can understand them I think they get a bit relieved and just start spilling everything to me in hopes I’ll pass their message on.”

Howard couldn’t tell whether Vince was being serious or not. Did he actually think he could talk to animals? Or was he simply making a joke?

Claude snickered, looking around the room to gauge the reaction of all the other kids, before back at Vince. “What a weirdo!” He shouted in Vince’s direction, pointing and encouraging the class to join in as they all laughed and mocked in Vince’s direction.

Howard sat quietly, too intimidated to do anything other than feel the small bit of relief in his system that for once, he wasn’t the one being made fun of. Right now, he was in the clear. He wasn’t going to bring any further attention to him than needed.

“Settle down, class!” Mrs Bright shouted over the laughter, her seriousness plastered across her face as she tried to regain control.

Howard took the chance of the distraction to look over at Vince, prepared to see his broken features or saddened eyes as being laughed at so cruelly, but instead, Vince looked unphased. His attention was now turned to fly that had landed on the desk, already distracted as he chewed on his bottom lip with concentration, eyes focused as if listening hard. Howard figured he should say something to him, maybe he was just better at hiding the pain than Howard was. “Are-um, are you alright?” He whispered, nudging into Vince’s shoulder with his own to get the other kids attention.

Vince looked up at him, a little startled that Howard had talked to him, before looking confused with a slight grin. “Yeah – why wouldn’t I be?”

Now it was Howard’s turn to be a little taken aback. “Oh, well, uh, I just thought with what Claude said and the laughing and all that, that maybe...” Howard drifted off, not really sure what else to say.

Vince, however, just shrugged casually at him before his smile grew even wider. “Nah, it’s alright. Besides, Rufus said he’s going to throw up on his sandwich later anyway.”

“Rufus?”

“Yeah!” Vince beamed excitedly, pointing down to the fly he’d just previously been staring at. “He says he’s got a tuna sandwich today too, one of Rufus’ favourites.”

Howard just stared back at him in mild disbelief, eyes scanning the other boys features to tell if he was messing around with him or not. “Right...” He settled on, noting how Mrs Bright had moved on with the lesson, her attention focused back on the board where she was writing.

Vince chuckled. “It’s okay if you don’t believe me. No one ever does.” But he didn’t seem upset by that fact. His attention was taken once again towards the fly, or ‘Rufus’, momentarily, as he nodded with concentration. “Rufus said he throws up on Claude’s sandwiches all the time, actually.”

“Why?”

Vince looked at Howard with complete seriousness. “Because he bullies you.”

They looked at each for a few moments, almost as if trying to telepathically communicate with one another – Howard wanting to know how Vince knew that, and Vince wanting Howard to trust him. Howard didn’t know what to say – did Vince really get that information from a fly, or did Howard just look pathetic enough to give it away?

When neither of them spoke, Vince merely turned his attention back to the book laid out on the table, his mind wandering again to another topic of conversation as he moved on from this one just as quickly as it started, leaving Howard staring at the back of his head, a mixture of embarrassment and intrigue lingering.

When class finished, Howard bolted out the door. He normally stayed around longer, waiting for Claude and the other kids to leave first so he could sneak out after, but he just wanted to be alone for a moment. Too much happened in such a short time frame that his brain was nearly on overdrive – first a new kid, then the new kid was placed next to him, now he’s going to be stuck with the new kid until new books arrive, then the new kid was the one to be laughed at instead of him because apparently he can talk to animals, and then a goddamn fly told the new kid he gets bullied?! Naturally, Howard just wanted to get out of there.

He made a bee-line straight to the cafeteria, hoping to just get his food and get out, grabbing a tray and lining up, mind wandering on everything else but the food in front of him. He just hoped he didn’t have any more classes with Vince today...

“Oooh, this is fancy.”

Howard’s head shot up, looking at the kid beside him with a mild shock. How did he get here so fast?

“What’s good?” He flashed a smile at Howard expectantly, tray in hand as he waited for the others’ response.

“Uh...” Was all Howard said dumbly. “The... the potato bake is good.” He said, not really sure why. No one had ever really talked to him before like this; asked for his opinion on something. So that, mixed in with the craziness that was the previous class, made his brain a little slower than normal.

“Genius.” Vince said excitedly, eyes scanning the rest of the food. “You really had to pee or something?”

“What?”

“You ran out of class like a Cheetah was chasing you. Figured you were rushing somewhere... Or did you just not want to miss the potato bake?” Vince smirked, eyes back to Howard as they moved up the line.

Howard’s face involuntarily went red as he was put on the spot to come up with a reason that wasn’t ‘I was trying to get away from you’, when the lunch-lady addressed him, asking what he wanted. Momentarily distracted, Vince and Howard ordered their lunch, and after Howard paid he once again hoped to lose Vince in the sea of people whilst the other finished off paying for his own, but as he turned around he was instead greeted by a group of people blocking his path.

“Oh, you got me lunch? Thanks Loon.” Claude smirked, grabbing the tray right out of Howard’s hands, to which Howard didn’t resist. It was a common occurrence – Claude taking his food, only to not eat it and just throw it in the bin right in front of him simply because he could. Howard’s shoulder sagged in defeat, eyes staring down at the ground as he waited for Claude to leave, knowing he couldn’t walk away on his own or it would only cause more drama. As he’d learnt from previous experience. “What did you get me today, hmm?” Claude began inspecting the contents on the tray piece by piece, picking up smaller items and flicking them over in Howard’s direction nonchalantly, not phased when they’d land on the other boys face or clothes, staining them, all while Howard just stood there waiting for it to be over, knowing no one was going to help him.

No one ever did.

“Hey, don’t you have a tuna sandwich to get to?” Vince’s voice piped up, standing next to Howard, his own tray of lunch in hand.

Claude stared up at Vince is surprise, startled by his outburst for a second, before the same cocky grin spread across his face again. “What, the koala’s tell you that too, huh? You freak.”

“No, a fly did.”

Howard wanted to crawl into his shirt and hide away. Vince was only going to make this worse...

There was a pause as everyone around them registered what Vince had said, before a unanimous laughter erupted. “A fly?! You’re friends with the flies?!” They all laughed, while Vince once again, seemed as unphased as ever, staring at them all like they were the weirdo’s in this scenario.

“Yeah, I am. And I’m friends with Howard. And I don’t like it when people are mean to my friends.”

Claude snorted. “Well would you look at that. The 2 freaks are friends. Typical.” With that phrase, Claude leant forward, harshly shoving Howard in the shoulder causing him to stumble back. “What are you going to do about it, fly boy? Get a swarm of rats on me, huh?”

“Firstly, a group of rats is called a Mischief, not a swarm. A secondly, rats do tend to attack each other, so I wouldn’t need to send them on you. They’d be able to sniff out their own kind well enough.” Vince spat, a smirk evident on his face as Howard fought with all his might to stifle the chuckle that was threatening to burst. No one had ever stood up to Claude before, let alone for Howard.

And Vince said they were… friends?

Claude, however, didn’t seem to think it was as amusing. “You little-“ he shouted, taking a step forward to either grab Vince or punch him, Howard wasn’t sure and didn’t find out because luckily enough another teacher, Mr. Barley, intervened.

“Everything alright here boys?” His voice boomed, eyeing off everyone within the vicinity with suspicion, knowing full well it was not alright, but giving them an opportunity to leave it alone and walk away.

Claude seethed, staring down both Vince and Howard as subtly as he can now that a teacher was involved, eyes never tearing away from the 2 boys. “Yes, sir. We’re just leaving.” He spat, nostrils flaring as he gave them one last look over, before backing away into his friends, and turning on his heels to walk out of the cafeteria.

Mr. Barley didn’t stick around much longer either, probably annoyed he had to walk away from his lunch to sort whatever that was out, leaving just Vince and Howard.

“What a twat.” Vince said with a chuckle, shaking his head in amused disbelief as he watched after Claude.

“Why did you do that?” Howard asked suddenly, looking to Vince with a urgency in his eyes.

Vince furrowed his brows. “Do what?”

“Say that to him!” Howard nearly snapped, dumbfounded by all of Vince’s actions today, despite only knowing him for perhaps close to an hour.

Vince still looked just as confused, however. “Because he was being mean to you.”

“I could have handled it.”

For a moment Howard expected Vince to laugh at him, to tell him that no, no he couldn’t have handled it, but instead, Vince looked... sad?

“Oh. Oh, sorry.. I just thought that, you know, whenever I would be hunted in the jungle by this monkey king I couldn’t always defend myself, so the other animals would help out. Sorry if that’s not what you wanted...”

Howard stared at him, eyes scanning every feature looking for a smirk or a laugh or a hint that he was joking with that story, but no such thing came. “The monkey king?” He eventually asked, his own small smirk forming from the corner of his lips as he held back a joyous laugh.

Vince relaxed a little, sensing Howard’s own easing as his smile returned once again. “That’s a story for another time, I think.”

Finally, Howard did allow his own smile to breach through, almost laughing down at Vince with ease and a natural sense to it he didn’t quite recognise. “You are a little weird, you know that?”

“Yeah, so I’ve heard.” Vince replied smugly with a shrug. “Want to share my lunch?”

-

Weirdly enough, somehow Vince managed to convince Howard to meet him by the exit after school. Their last class for the day wasn’t together, and Vince said it would good to walk home with someone in case he got lost because apparently that was a regularity with him, and Howard didn’t decline it.

There was something about Vince... the more they talked the more Howard felt himself relax, like he didn’t have to be walking on eggshells waiting for the ball to drop, like maybe, just maybe, Vince did actually want to be Howard’s friend. That maybe they were both just as weird as each other.

Howard stood by the spot he told Vince he’d meet him, watching all the other kids waltz and skip out into the world, braced for the afternoon of freedom to commence, his eyes scanning for the shaggy hair and beaming smile and positive attitude. After a few minutes, Vince still hadn’t emerged, and the crowd of kids was starting to wear down. Thinking possibly Vince had already managed to get himself lost in the maze of hallways, Howard decided it was probably best to go and find him. He didn’t have anywhere else to be after all, and a small part of him had actually been looking forward to walking home with Vince all afternoon.

He called for him in the emptying corridors, looking into each opened door to see if maybe he was stuck hanging back with a teacher, but it wasn’t until he passed the bathroom that he finally realized he’d found him. Inside, Howard could hear voices, several voices actually. And he only needed to listen for a few seconds to know exactly who they belonged to, and what was going on.

“Why don’t you say hi to all your fish friends down there, huh?!”

The sounds of laughter mixed in with running water and a struggle was all too familiar to Howard, and most muscles in his body were telling him to walk away, run before they see him and do the same to him, but his heart was overpowering his brain it seemed, and without even a second to think about his actions, he bolted into the bathroom, coming face to face with exactly what he expected.

A group of Claude’s friends were huddled around a toilet, with Claude standing by the door shouting and controlling the situation, with one of his friends shoving the face of a kneeling and scrambling Vince into the bowl, flushing the water repeatedly, only allowing him to come up for air for a few seconds before cruelly shoving him back down.

Instant flashbacks and PTSD kicked in for Howard who has been in Vince’s position way too many times to count by this point as stood on the tiled floor, frozen in place now that he was face to face with then, unsure of what he had actually intended to do in the first place when he walked in here.

“Well, what do we have here?” Claude mocked when he saw him, getting the attention of his friends in the process who turned to look at Howard as well, smirking and snickering at the sight of him as the one holding down Vince finally released his grip, allowing the smaller boy to collapse to the ground, coughing and taking in breathes of air finally now he had a second of peace.

“I...uh-“ Howard stuttered stupidly, his anxieties kicking in as he shuffled in place, thinking how idiotic it was to put himself in this position to begin with.

“You what? You want some of this too, hmm? Don’t worry – we haven’t forgotten about you! We’re just showing your new friend some of the things he’ll have to look forward to now he’s here.” Claude smirked, and Howard looked over his shoulder at Vince huddled on the floor, seated up against the wall, water trickling down his hair and face as he locked eyes with Howard too, a softness in them that was telling Howard to leave, that Vince wouldn’t be mad or shocked if he did, that he would understand.

He wanted to listen to him, to turn around right now and bolt back home. Surely Vince could handle it. Howard’s dealt with it plenty of times, what’s one day for someone else to finally have a turn at this torment? But then Howard remembered the one thing he’d always wanted when in this position, and that was for someone to stand up for him. Someone to try and stop it.

Just like Vince did for him in the cafeteria... Only after an hour of knowing Howard, he did exactly what Howard had always wanted someone to do.

Howard always wanted someone to take action for him. Maybe now it was time he took some action for someone else?

“L-leave him alone...” He spoke, stuttering over his words and sounding not threatening in the slightest as he kept trying to hunch in on himself – the ability to make himself seem tall and commanding just non-existent for him.

Claude paused, registering what Howard had said, before bursting out into laughter with his friends. “What? Did you- did you just tell me to leave him alone?” He double checked, mocking him.

Howard swallowed the lump in his throat. “Leave him alone.” He repeated, this time sounding bit more sure of himself, forcing himself to speak up as he locked eyes with Claude, every now and then glancing over at Vince who was watching the entire thing unfold with awe.

With one more snort and a glance over at his friends, Claude smirked to himself. “Yeah, I thought you did.” He mumbled to himself, strutting forward and grabbing Howard by the collar of his shirt, yanking him harshly further into the bathroom and over towards his friends that were grinning with mischievous hunger.

-

“I hope they clean these things.” Vince mumbled from where he sat on the floor, head up against the wall behind him as he stared up at the ceiling.

“Pete the janitor comes in every afternoon at 5:30pm. He’ll be here soon.” Howard responded nonchalantly from his own similar position next to Vince, his own hair dripping now after he received the same treatment for standing up for his friend.

“This happen to you often, huh?”

“I’m quite familiar with it, yes. And now I think since you’re associated with me, it’ll probably be happening to you too.”

“I better start packing 2 shirts then.” Howard laughed, genuinely laughed despite the torment he’d just went through yet again, looking to his side towards Vince to find him already looking back at him with a smile on his face. “Not a bad first day, I’d say.”

“Not bad? You got your head flushed down the toilet... that’s probably the worst thing that could happen on someone’s first day.” Howard retorted.

“Yeah, but I made a friend.” Was Vince’s quick response as he grinned. “You’re pretty cool, Howard.”

Howard blushed, looking down in between his feet on the tiled floor. “Thanks.” Was all he said, not knowing what to say to a compliment since he never got them before...

“I hope we stay friends.”

-

Ahhhhhhh!!! Feels good to be posting this on tumblr again!! Feels like i havent posted on tumblr in FAR TOO LONG!!! I hope this kinda cute story makes up for it in some way???

[asleepinawell]

hiii not sure if it’s okay to ask a poi question but here it goes - i recall seeing you expressing (at least some level of) discontent with what Harold has done on the show (to root, to shaw and all those hypocritical decisions throughout). would you like to share more about your thoughts on this character? tks

always okay to ask poi questions. since the fandom is pretty small these days i was going to put my answer under a read more line so people could ignore it more easily if it’s a subject that bothers them but apparently you can’t add read more lines in ask answers? thanks tumblr! so if this is a topic that annoys anyone, please, just skip it. also, while some of this is facts or based on facts a lot of stuff is obviously my opinion and therefore not canon and not the only opinion etc etc.

in general, i wasn’t crazy about the way harold treated any of the other characters (with the exception of john who he had a pretty great relationship with). for root, there was the refusal to call her root, which i found very gross and uncomfortable (like, in general you should respect what people ask to be called, but also it was linked to the traumatic death of her childhood friend and he absolutely knew that so fuck that shit). he even said something along the lines of 'john reese is what you prefer to be called' to john right in the first episode? he was okay with using reese's fake name, but not hers because he made her identity into a power game.

he also tended to be..hmm, patronizing is the wrong word (and lbr root was extremely patronizing to everyone) but more that he treated her like ‘rehabilitating’ her was his pet project or something. i mean one thing that always struck me was his ‘what happened to you’ line in bad code and then the subsequent decision to put her in a mental institution instead of, you know, jail, which is where every other perp they ran into tended to go. he saw her as broken and flawed and in need of his help which, to me, came off as hypocritical and belittling.

also, putting someone in a psychiatric institution where they get pumped full of drugs when they don’t need to be? really fucked up! even if you argue root needed therapy/was depressed whatever, that’s not what they were treating her for. they were treating her for ‘delusions’ and ‘hearing voices’ which were...real things. like, the machine was speaking to her. harold knew that. he let her get put on all sorts of medication and put in solitary confinement and oh yes also her doctor was a really fucked up dude, something harold could easily have dug up if he’d bothered. also the whole ‘killing off a woman to advance a man’s character development thing’ is, uh, a bad trope. to put it mildly. i could write a lot more about his shit with root but let’s move on.

in some ways, his attitude towards shaw bothers me most. he consistently treats her like she’s violent and unhinged because she has aspd and despite the large amount of evidence to the contrary. she is, in fact, the most cool and controlled member of the team (not counting carter) and the least likely to go off half-cocked. shaw does play into this, but mostly only with harold and only through her words, not her actions. she knows what he thinks of her. when she’s captured by samaritan, harold gives up on her very quickly in a way he would never have done for john (and probably not for root either at that point). shaw’s reaction to sim!harold in 6741 of ‘did you even look for me’ says a lot about what she thinks he thinks of her. his whole ‘binary moral compass’ line to her is also, uh, heavily projecting. shaw and carter had the strongest moral compasses of the group. by a long shot. 

moving on to the machine. so first and foremost, if you’re creating a sentient being, whether that’s having a kid or making a self-aware AI, you don’t create something with the intention of locking it up and ignoring it forever. (and he was creating her for the bush/cheney administration???? who TM pointed out was terrible if he somehow had managed to miss that. root called them something like the worst people imaginable and she wasn’t exaggerating). was it too dangerous to let TM be free from the get go? maybe! but then don’t fucking make an AI you think can destroy the world, buddy. there are a lot of reasons he made TM and none of them make this acceptable to me. once TM had clearly proven to be not a threat and trying to help he continued to ignore her and act like she was dangerous.

harold always needed very badly to feel like he had the moral high ground and not be the person who made a bad decision, which yes, is probably partly due to the trauma from what happened to nathan but that doesn’t make it okay when being paralyzed by being unable to make a decision got people killed. more than once! also, most of his morals got tossed out when they weren’t convenient. wouldn’t kill the senator to save the world because killing is bad! next episode he’s like if anything happens to grace kill all of them. cool story, still murder.

i wanna conclude this rant by talking about harold as a character vs harold as a person. meaning, harold as a fictional character who is used as a narrative device in a story as opposed to harold himself without the context of him being fictional. i don’t mind characters who say and do things i dislike. it’s very important to have characters you dislike as people imo. feels like an understatement. but lambet, for example, is a slimy asshole. the story is aware of this. he gets an ending a slimy asshole deserves. harold has a lot of flaws, and causes a lot of damage, gets his friends killed, and his stubborn refusal to budge on his arbitrary moral high ground lets samaritan take over and almost makes team machine lose. he gets a happy ending. with the woman he lied to (and caused a lot of pain and grief by lying to). root ends up dead, shaw gets tortured and fights her way back for root only to have her die which is kind of handwaved as ‘well she has tm with root’s voice good enough’, and john, after having rediscovered his will to live and have a life in the end of s4 goes right back to his whole dying for someone else thing. only harold gets the happy ending.

the show was actually pretty good at highlighting harold’s flaws and making them interesting, and then it kind of forgot that at the end in terms of story outcome. like, if harold had suffered enough to get a happy ending, then why didn’t anyone else get one? so my annoyance was with the narrative’s failure to satisfactorily conclude the characters’ arcs. (and for the record, i’m not one of the people who think he should have died. i don’t think it would have served a point. also death doesn’t equal redemption to me).

so, yeah, not a fan of him. don’t write him in my fics since my dislike would take time and focus away from writing about the people i do like. would probably be less bitter if they’d ended the show better. i was 300k words fic level of bitter. there was some post i saw going around recently about how if your found family show doesn’t end up with your found family together then you’ve kind of missed the whole point of found family and yeah, that.

[ongaku-ato-kakikomi]

Can you do a Duke Crocker imagine, where you're Nathan's twin and you can't feel anything either? Like you've always hated Duke and he jokingly pats you on the back one day and like Nathan with Audrey's touches, she can feel it and starts making any excuse to get Duke to have any contact with her(high fives, random hugs, grabbing his arm when she almost "falls" ect.) And she ends up falling in love with him despite his past with her brother🥺sorry if that's too long

(A/N): I’ve fallen in love with this idea as soon as I got it in my ask box. Thank you so much for trusting me for writing it, dear! <3 I changed your examples of contacts the reader creates to try and make it more logical, so I hope you’ll like what I’ve come up with despite that.

“Show me your teeth.”

You roll your eyes at your brother, Nathan. “I come to see you at work and that’s the first thing you say to me?”

He blinks a few times at you. “Sorry. Hi, (Y/N). Now show me your teeth.”

You reluctantly open your mouth wide, your brother taking his time to inspect each tooth that is very much still in place.

“Show me your hands.” You close your mouth and put your hands in front of you, turning them around a few times. “Now turn around.”

You give out a groan while you do as he says, already tired of these shenanigans.

“You don’t seem to be hurt anywhere. Good.” He gives you a bright smile, satisfied with his inspection. “Someone has to make sure you’re not bleeding or losing any members.”

You quirk an eyebrow at him. “And is someone making sure you’re not bleeding?” He loses his smile, already knowing what you’re gonna say. “That’s right. It goes both ways. Now show me your teeth, Nathan.”

“Don’t worry, (Y/N).” Audrey suddenly appears next to your brother, the blond putting her hand on his shoulder. “I checked him twenty minutes ago. He seems good.”

You notice him slightly tensing up under Audrey’s touch, his lips slightly stretching out into a small smile when he turns towards her. Nathan told you about Audrey’s specialty; how he manages to feel every single bit of touch she gives him. And though you feel a bit jealous of him, you also feel extremely happy for him. You’d do anything to be able to physically feel something, anything... even the breath of the wind against your face, but you can’t.

“Hey, (Y/N) is here!” Your expression falters down as soon as you recognize Duke’s voice from behind you, already seeing his large smirk inside your mind without even looking at him. “What a surprise!”

You give your brother a glare. “I thought you said he wouldn’t be here today?”

You’ve tried to avoid seeing Duke Crocker most of your life, always feeling pure annoyance whenever he’s in the same room as you, and as of now, you’ve managed to only see him a few times since childhood. You were also sure that you wouldn’t see him today, especially since Nathan told you that he wouldn’t be here.

“I didn’t think he would be.” Your brother turns his eyes towards Audrey, squinting them when he notices a knowing grin on her lips. “But I have a little idea why...”

“Ouch.” You turn your head towards Duke just as he comes to a halt next to you. “And here I thought we could be friends. What did I do to earn such hatred?”

You give him a hard smile. “Look in the mirror and you’ll have your answer.”

He gives out a dramatic gasp at your response, your brother giving out a loud laugh. “Good one!”

“Guys!” Audrey gives you all her ‘big eyes’. “Come on, can’t you get along for once?”

“Nah, it’s okay, Audrey.” Duke gives her a wink, not at all bothered by your remarks. “(Y/N) is just teasing me. She always does. Right, (Y/N)?”

You’re about to let out another remark when he abruptly pats your back, your words dying inside your throat as soon as you realized what happened.

You felt his hands on your back.

You tilt your head at Duke with pure confusion, the man staring back at you with the exact emotion. For once, you weren’t looking at him with annoyance or hatred, and it couldn’t exactly pinpoint why you suddenly weren’t.

“Audrey.” Your brother speaks up, the police officer giving the blond a hard look. “Why is he here?”

“Didn’t I tell you?” Audrey gives him an innocent look. “He’s gonna help us with the investigation.”

“He’s gonna ‘what’?!”

Duke looks away from you to send your brother a smirk. “Audrey said I’d be ‘useful’.”

You blink a few times, suddenly remembering where you are. “I find that unlikely.”

“Yeah, well...” He looks back at you, his smile not at all flinching. “You always do.”

You give him back a hard smile, though not as hard as you usually do. The feeling of his hands on your back still lingers there and partially clouds your mind. You can’t help but wonder if you’ve imagined it. You were thinking about your brother’s situation with Audrey... maybe you were wishing for the same thing so hard that your brain gave you a small exception?

“Anyway...” Duke claps his hands together, looking back towards Nathan and Audrey. “Are we gonna go or are we just gonna stand here like idiots?”

Your brother gives him a glare. “Audrey?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” She grabs her coat from her chair, sending you a smile on your way out. “You’re welcomed to join us, (Y/N).”

“Huh?” You blink in surprise, slowly starting to follow them. “Yeah... yeah, sure.”

“(Y/N) is willing to share a car ride with me?” Duke sends you a grin. “This must be my lucky day.”

“Don’t push it.”

He just laughs at your reaction, none of you noticing Nathan and Audrey exchanging whispering words.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You give a side gland towards Duke sitting next to you, your eyes carefully watching his face as he spits out a large number of words to annoy your brother more than he usually does. Normally you would have shut him up with one of your remarks by now, but the moment from earlier still obsess you. Forget how or why it happened, you have to know if you’ve imagined his touch or not... and there’s only one way to be sure.

“Ow!” You suddenly interrupt Duke by suddenly flicking your fingers against his cheek, his head snapping towards you as he holds his face with his hand. “Why did you do that?”

You ignore him and look down at your fingers, feeling a satisfying pain rushing through them. “... I just had an urge.”

You barely hear your brother laugh as Duke pouts about the pain you put him through, a small smile appearing on your lips as you realize that this is real. You can feel Duke’s touch. Would you have preferred someone else? Absolutely. Anyone but Duke would have been more than welcomed. But are you going to ignore this opportunity life is giving you? Hell no.

You’re gonna have fun with this.

“Oh, stop crying.” You poke his cheek just where you flicked your fingers earlier, a large grin forming on your lips when you feel his skin against yours. “I didn’t take you for a baby, Crocker.”

“What-stop poking me!” He pushes your hand away, a frown on his face as he hears Nathan chuckle in the front. “You’re lucky you can’t feel anything-”

 He gets interrupted by your hands suddenly squishing his face away, confusing spreading on his features.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Trying to shut you up.” You let go of his face, realizing that you might be going a bit too far. “But it’s not working.”

“Guys.” Audrey interrupts your conversation, Nathan still chuckling as he stops the car. “We’re here.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It’s been more than a few minutes since you’ve arrived at the crime scene, Nathan and Audrey now currently questioning the witnesses. Why were you and Duke even around in the first place? You have no idea. But as the two of you wait around for them to finish, you decide to test your theory a little more.

“Ow!” Duke takes a step away from you as soon as he feels your shoe kicking his leg, his eyes squinting at you. “Okay, what is your problem?”

You lose your grin as soon as he says that. “It’s not obvious? You’re my problem.”

“Yeah, yeah... you hate me, I know. But you’ve never kicked me. Or poked me. Or squished my face.” He points at you, suspicion all over his features. “So what’s the sudden change, huh?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You almost want to curse yourself at how fast you said those words, already knowing that he’s not going to believe that. You almost want to cringe when you see his lips stretch out into a large grin, already dreading the worst.

“Don’t tell me...” His smile gets wider, his excitement suddenly rising. “You actually like me!”

“What-no!” You frown, already shaking your head at him in disgust. “Ew! Never!”

“Aw, don’t deny it.” He approaches his face to yours, his annoying ‘charm’ turning on. “I knew you’d like me eventually. Everyone does-”

You shove his face away with your hands, muffling his words by doing so. “I will never ever like you.”

You truly believe those words, trying your best to ignore the tingling going through your skin after you touched his face. This is not going to change how you feel about Duke. You’ll make sure of it.

But Duke seems to be sure of something else, as he starts to laugh while he gently puts your hands away from his face.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Wuornos.” He gives you a knowing smile. “But I know the truth.”

You realize that you’ve let him hold onto your hands, your mind to enraptured by the feeling of it to let you do anything about it until now. You suddenly pull them back towards you, sending him a glare.

“In your dreams, Duke.”

“Already happened.”

You give out a gagging sound while you walk away from him, his laugh resonating in your ears. You were hoping there wasn’t a blush creeping up on your cheeks, having never been able to feel the heat of it. What you could feel was your heartbeat getting incredibly louder inside your chest, your mind already screaming at it to stop.

This is one of the many reasons why you try so hard to avoid Duke. You try your best to hate him, to despise him... and you do... until you get to spend time with him, and then you have to beat yourself up to hate him again. You don’t want to like him, not after what happened between him and your brother all those years ago... and you’re not gonna let his stupid feeling exception put all of your past efforts to crumble.

So why are you not quite believing that?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Boo.”

You give out a scream when you hear Duke suddenly whisper that word in your ears, already pushing him away from you. “What the hell?!”

“Aw, did I scare you?” He gives you a grin. “Sorry... not sorry!”

You glare at him, feeling your hands starting to tingle from having just pushed him. It’s been a week since you’ve felt anything, having realized that it wasn’t worth risking your brother’s trust. So you’ve started to avoid the crooked criminal again, and it worked. Until now.

Gosh, why did you have to go on a walk today?

“What do you want?”

“To bother you. I think it’s a good payback from last time.” He shrugs, his words already making you groan in annoyance as you start walking away. “I also wanted to see how you were doing. You know? With the whole ‘liking me’ thing?”

“I don’t like you.”

“Hm. Right.” He snaps his fingers before he points at you. “You love me.”

You suddenly stop in your tracks, sending him a glare. “I do not love you!”

He just gives you a large grin as an answer, as if he knew something you didn’t, which only seems to make you angrier.

“What?”

“You’re pretty when you’re mad-ow!” He rubs his arms after you hit it, his grin coming back soon after. “See? You like me!”

You shake your head at him. “How is me hitting you proof that I like you?”

“I don’t know... maybe the fact that you’re blushing?” Your eyes open wide, your hands immediately going to your cheeks to try and feel the heat: but as usual, nothing. “If you don’t believe me, I can fetch a mirror for you.”

“I’m not blushing.” You walk away from him, deciding to just deny everything. “You’re lying.”

“But I’m not!” He follows you close behind, forcing you to stop walking when he suddenly jumps in front of you. “Come on... why are you denying it?”

You glare at him once more. “I don’t need to deny things that don't exist.”

“Is liking me that much of a bad thing?” His question takes you by surprise, and you can almost sense a glint of pain in his eyes. “You don’t have to hate me just cause your brother does, you know?”

“Are you not hearing me when I talk?” You poke his shoulder with your finger, slightly pushing him away. “I. Don’t. Like. You.”

“But I like you.”

You stare at him in shock, your words choking in your throat. “... what?”

“I said I like you.” He puts his hands in his jeans’ pockets, seeming a little less confident than before. “I always have, and I know you like me... so why won’t you just give me a chance?”

“I...” You give out a sigh, rubbing your face with your hands. “Why do you keep saying that I like you?”

He lightly chuckles. “Why did you suddenly start touching me so much?”

“Because...” You hesitate for a second, then give out another sigh. “Cause I can feel you, okay?”

He stares at you for a second, confusion in his eyes. “Huh?”

“When you pat my back the other day.” You cross your arms over your chest, a sense of embarrassment going through you. “I felt that, but I wasn’t sure it was real... so that’s why I kept hitting you and all.”

“... you can feel me?”

“Yeah.” You notice the glint of an idea going through his eyes, frowning. “What are you thinking, Crocker?”

“So if I do this...” Your eyes widen when he suddenly takes your hand in his, his lips stretching out into a grin. “... you can feel that?”

You feel a shot of electricity running through your arm, watching his fingers intertwine with yours. “... what are you doing?” 

“What if I do this....” You shut your eyes close when you suddenly feel his other hand against your cheek, his fingers gently pushing a strand of hair away from your face. “... can you also feel that?”

You feel the warmth of his skin against yours, a shudder running down your spine for the first time in your entire life. You open your eyes again, now seeing him getting dangerously closer. “Duke... seriously...”

“What about this?”

You’ve never been able to feel what a kiss feels like before that moment, your mind screaming the moment you felt his lips on yours. Every little movement he made, every touch of his fingers against your skin felt like little explosions that had dangerous consequences for your heart. You couldn’t think anymore, all you could do was feel, and when he parts away a few seconds later, you can barely hear him talk.

“Did you feel that?”

“I...” A stutter threatens to come out, your free hand slowly raising so you can point at him. “... I hate you...”

He gives out a grin at your answer, noticing the tremble in your voice. “Really? I beg to differ-ow!” He gives out a laugh when he realizes that you’ve hit his shoulder yet again. “Well, I guess you definitely felt that.”

You try to wipe his touch away from your lips, without any use. “Don’t do that again.”

“Alright, I’ll do that again.” He gives out a larger grin. “As many times as you want.”

“You know that’s not what I said!” You realize that you’re still holding his hand, and so you try to free yourself, but without any success. “Duke, let go of my hand.”

“Nope.”

“Let go of my hand!”

“Not until you agree that you like me.” You give out a groan, which only seems to make his grin wider. “I’m waiting...”

“Fine!” You shake your head before you glare at him. “I like you. Satisfied?”

“Very.” He lets go of your hand, a sense of disappointment washing over you when he does. “Now... are you free tonight?”

You squint your eyes at him. “... why?”

“So I can take you on a proper date.”

You stare at him for a few seconds, then give out a sigh. “... you’re not gonna take ‘no’ as an answer, are you?”

His lips stretch out. “Does that mean you’re saying ‘yes’?”

You hated him. You’ve always hated him, just like your brother did. You swore this newfound discovery wouldn’t change anything... but gosh, it did. And there’s nothing you can do about it.

“Yeah.” You give out a sigh. “Yeah... I guess I can go on a date with you.”

“Yes!”

You can’t help but chuckle when you see him throw his fist up in the air in victory.

And you know, maybe... just maybe... this little exception is a hint that this is destiny.

[ghstandpucks]

Cutting Edge ~ Nathan MacKinnon Ch. 3

A/N: Hey everyone, thanks for all the love on the last chapter! I loved seeing that you enjoyed it! Also thank you to @pumpkinpatchmakar​ and @pizzasloot​ for your kind words after my update post <3 

I do know where the story is going, and I’m excited to write it all out! Just bare with me, between school and my heart being broken, it might take longer between chapters but I will get to them!

Tags are open, just let me know! Enjoy!

Prologue Ch.1 Ch.2 

           Nate was halfway to his apartment when his phone rang; an incoming call from his captain. “What’s up?” he asked as he answered.

           “Where have you been? I’ve been trying to get ahold of you for the past hour,” Gabe asked. Nate now realized that he had seen all those calls and texts, but after getting your number he forgot about them. He cleared his throat.

           “Sorry Landy. I was at the rink with Y/N,” he stated, unsure of what the captain’s response would be. When Gabe remained quiet, Nate became a bit nervous. “You there?”

           “Y/N? As in Coach Y/L/N, Y/N?” he asked, and Nate could hear Gabe’s amusement over the phone.

           “Yes,” he answered shortly. Gabe laughed.

           “What happened? Practice ended 3 hours ago, what have you guys been doing…or do I even want to ask?” Gabe said suspiciously.

           “It was nothing like that. I heard someone still on the ice when I was about to leave and went to see who it was. It turned out to be Y/N and she was just skating around and asked me to skate with her,” Nate explained as he pulled into his apartment complex.

           “Oh, so she’s just Y/N now? Seems like you two got close,” Gabe chuckled. Nate groaned as he parked. Maybe telling Landy wasn’t the smartest thing. “Please tell me you at least asked for her number or something before you left.”

           “I did actually. I asked her as we were leaving,” Nate said, quieter than he needed to.

           “Wow, okay. She’s definitely got you interested, doesn’t she?” Gabe sounded amused on the other end. Nate mumbled out a yes, knowing he wasn’t going to be living this down anytime soon. He was happy with the little progress he made with you, but now he was sure Landy would look for any reason to bring you around, not that Nate wouldn’t enjoy seeing more of you anyways though. “Well, I guess that brings me to why I was calling in the first place. Mel and I are taking Linnea on a hike on Sunday and we’re inviting some of the guys to go since everyone is pretty much back in town. I was inviting you, and I think you should see if Y/N wants to come. I don’t think she really knows anyone here yet, and Mel wants to meet her. After I tell her about your afternoon she’s going to be dying to meet her,” Gabe chuckled. Nate perked up hearing that he had a legitimate excuse to text you right away, instead of trying to play it cool.

           “Yeah, I can ask her,” he said, a little too eagerly.

           “Great! And make sure you pick her up. She doesn’t need to drive when she doesn’t know where anything really is,” Gabe suggested, knowing his friend lacked skills in the romance department. Nate rolled his eyes, but he was grinning at the thought of seeing you away from the rink.

           “I know Landy. I’ll text her and see. I’ll let you know,” he said as he entered his apartment and plopped down onto his couch, saying goodbye as his captain became distracted by his daughter.

           On the other side of the city, you had fallen onto your own couch and immediately got on facetime. “Superstar! How are you doing sweetie?” Jeremy asked.

           “I think I just gave Nathan MacKinnon my number,” you said in one breath, throwing a pillow over your head. Jeremy laughed.

           “You think?” he asked. You threw the pillow off and looked at him.

           “I gave him my number. I stayed after to skate and he was still there and I have no idea where I got the courage but I asked him to skate with me and I taught him some skating, he taught me some hockey, and it was just really fun and then he asked me for my number…” you rambled off.

           “Hey, deep breath Y/N. That sounds like you both had a nice time. And is it really so bad to give an attractive hockey player your number?” Jeremy tried to be sympathetic because he could see the wheels spinning in your head. He had known you for too long to not know where this was going.

           “He’s on the Avs though Jer. I’m technically his coach. How is that ever going to work?” you asked.

           “I don’t know Y/N, I wish I could tell you. But it seems like you are starting to like this guy, and if he likes you too then I’m sure you can figure it out. Don’t overthink it. I’ve seen you do that a few times, always putting your career first. And although that worked then, you can’t keep running from everything outside of the rink,” Jeremy tried to reason with you.

           “I know,” you said, knowing he was right.

           “And know that whatever does or does not happen, I will be here as your biggest supporter,” he said. You smiled at him.

           “Thanks Jer. Sorry, I don’t know why I freaked out,”

           “Because you are starting to like him,” Jeremy smirked. Your phone chimed and you briefly caught the text from a number you didn’t know at the top. Tapping on it, you saw that it was from Nate. Before you could read anything else, Jeremy laughed. “And I’m guessing that is him?” You nodded.

           “I guess some of the team are going on a hike Sunday and he wants to know if I want to go,” you stated, your smile growing.

           “I want to hear all about this hike when you get home,” Jeremy said. “Hang up with me and text your Doug Dorsey back.”

           “This is not the premise of Cutting Edge,” you laughed at his mention of one of the main characters. Jeremy shrugged.

           “He’s a hockey player. You’re a figure skater. Close enough,” he said, before saying goodbye as he had to run to a team meeting. You hung up and opened up Nate’s text.  It read: Hey Y/N, it’s Nate. Some of the guys are going on a hike on Sunday and I was wondering if you would like to join us? Mel, Gabe’s wife, is going and he said she’s been wanting to meet you. If you have plans no worries. Just thought I would ask. You smiled, seeing as you had no plans for the weekend beside finishing unpacking and would rather spend some time getting to know the team better…and Nate.

Y/N: Hi! That sounds like fun. I would love to go as long I wasn’t intruding on a team thing. You answered. You were a little worried that your presence would be unwelcomed, being a coach. Your phone pinged with another message.

Nate: No you wouldn’t be. You were about to reply when a text bubble popped up, and the following appeared. I would like for you to be there. You were happy this wasn’t in person as your face became flushed.

Y/N: When and where? 😊 Nate texted you to be ready at 9am on Sunday, and told you where you would be going. He said he would pick you up, and you gave him your address. And as the day continued, you continued to talk with him. Saturday came, and neither of you had technically said goodbye as you fell asleep texting him the night before, so Nate didn’t feel like it was too much, too soon to continue your conversation the next morning. You were giddy when Sunday morning came and you were getting ready. You felt that you had gotten to know him a little more and were excited to spend some more time with him. Right on time at 9 in the morning, there was a knock on your door. You looked in the mirror, fixing your hair quickly before answering it. Nate stood there in basketball shorts and a t-shirt, holding two cups of Starbucks. “Good morning,” he smiled as he handed one to you.

           “Morning!” you replied as you took a sip, humming contently as you tasted the pumpkin spice latte. “Is this why you asked what I liked from Starbucks?” Nate shrugged as you turned away to grab your jacket off the back of your couch.

           “I’m just hoping you’ll forget about making me do those extra laps tomorrow,” he teased as he looked around your apartment. It was small, but not too small, with a few boxes still sitting in the corner. “Are you still not unpacked?” You let out a sigh.

           “I have too much crap. I need another bookshelf,” you shook your head and took another sip, exiting your apartment. “But flattery will get you everywhere in my book. I may overlook your extra laps.” Nate chuckled as you locked the door behind you and followed him to visitor parking. You blushed slightly as he held the passenger door to his car open for you. The both of you sat in comfortable silence for a moment as he started to drive, enjoying your coffee. “So, who’s all going today?” You finally asked.

           “Landy and Mel, Tyson, Burky, and Cale I believe. Landy invited pretty much everyone since we’re all back in town, but I think everyone else was busy,” Nate explained. You nodded.

           “Well I’m excited. Thanks for inviting me to tag along,” you smiled over at him.

           “Of course,” Nate smiled over at you quickly. You kept casual conversation as you made it to the outskirts of Denver and what looked like would be a pretty hike to an overlook. Nate parked and off to the side you saw Gabe with a beautiful woman and a toddler in one of those carrier packs standing under a tree. As you made your way over, Nate leaned down and whispered. “Don’t let Gabe start showing you pictures of Linnea; you’ll be sitting there for like 3 hours.” You giggled, catching the attention of Gabe. The woman who you assumed was his wife, turned also and smiled widely.

           “You must be Coach Y/L/N. I’m Mel, it’s nice to meet you!” She said, pulling you into a side hug as to not squish her daughter.

           “Y/N. It’s nice to meet you too!” You replied, barely missing the not so subtle wink Gabe sent Nate.

           “Hey Coach, glad you could join us” Gabe said, “This is our daughter Linnea,” he introduced the little blonde haired, blue eyed girl. You smiled at her tired little face.

           “She’s absolutely adorable!” You squealed looking at the little girl. You weren’t necessarily a kid person yet, still being in your early 20s, but this little one was just too cute! Just then the others showed.

           “Eww who invited our coach?” Tyson grinned at you. You made a face at him, about to respond before Gabe beat you to it.

           “I’d rather have her here than you,” he said as Tyson feigned hurt. The others laughed and after greetings were exchanged you all started to walk. As the guys walked ahead, you walked along with Mel and Linnea.

           “So how are you liking Denver?” she asked cheerily.

           “The weather is a nice change from SoCal, that’s for sure,” you let out a soft laugh. “I’ve really only been to like the rink and the grocery store, so I haven’t been able to explore much more than this. I was happy when Nate invited me to hike with you guys so I could see a bit more,” you smiled.

           “We should go get lunch then one day, and go shopping! If you would like to. I know hanging around the rink with the guys gets a little old,” she said sincerely, and you couldn’t help but feel excited at the possibility of making a new friend.

           “That sounds like fun! I’m not used to being around this much testosterone.”

           “Yeah they are terrible sometimes.” You both started to laugh, catching the attention of the guys in front of you. You locked eyes with Nate, and blushed slightly under the grin he was sending you. Tyson walked over to the two of you and slung his arm around your shoulders.

           “Coach, I have a question…” you looked at him apprehensively and he gave you a sly grin. “Who is your favorite so far?” Nate you automatically thought, but were nervous to say out loud.

           “Well it’s definitely not you,” you replied, shrugging off his arm to the chirps of everyone else.

           “I bet it’s Nate,” Andre spoke up with a grin, Nate shooting him a look. You tried to think of something quick to say, seeing as Nate was looking as uncomfortable as you were starting to feel.

           “No, he has extra laps to skate tomorrow,” you tried to joke, hoping to ease Nate. It worked, he grinned at you and chuckled.

           “You don’t even know if you can enforce that,” he teased back.

           “I will figure it out!” you yelled back dramatically. The rest of the walk went like that, with the guys chirping one another, and dragging you and Mel into it. At some point after talking a bit to Cale, you ended up next to Nate as your little group came to a stop at a look out point. The trees were turning color with the season and everything looked pristine and beautiful. When Mel suggested taking a group picture. You automatically started to back up and were about to offer to take the picture when Nate gently placed his hand on your back.

           “Your part of this group too. Don’t be trying to sneak off,” he smiled at you. You were about to reply that it was okay when Andre spoke up.

           “Yeah Coach. Grace our picture with your Olympic winning smile.” He said, sending you a wink. You laughed and shook your head.

           “Oh God. That one hurts my face,” you admitted. You were known for always smiling throughout your routines. Even if you fell, you kept your smile. By the end of a four in a half minute long program though, that smile usually felt forced and plastered, even if it didn’t look that way. Andre turned his camera around as a selfie and held it up since he was the tallest. You were toward the back with Nate, his hand still on your back and you stood on your toes to try to be taller, your short frame looking incredibly small next to the larger bodies around you. After the picture was taken and sent to everyone, you and Mel exchanged numbers as you all continued the hike back to your cars. It was just after 1pm and you all decided to get lunch. You enjoyed your time with everyone and were starting to feel like Denver could be home. After lunch, Nate drove you back to your apartment. You were slightly sad the day was coming to an end. He parked and insisted on walking you up to your apartment, even though you assured him it wasn’t a big deal. Opening your front door, he eyed your still packed boxes again.  

           “You know, I could help you put together a book shelf if you’d like,” Nate said, face flushing a bit. You thought it was adorable, someone as large as him flustered.

           “That’s kind of you, but I have to go buy one first,” you smiled at him. He shrugged.

           “I can go with you. You might need help carrying it,” he smirked and you let out a laugh.

           “Wow, I think you are just really trying to get out of doing those laps tomorrow,” you shook your head.

           “Are you really going to make me do those?” he asked, leaning against your door frame.

           “I’m not sure yet, I haven’t decided,” you shrugged, making him chuckle. You looked up at him and couldn’t help but smile, the thought that someone might actually care about you as a person, and not because of your accolades filling you with immense joy. He was offering to help you build a bookcase after all. “I might just take you up on that offer though.” Nate smiled and pushed himself off your door frame and extended his arms to you. You gave him a hug and have never felt quiet as safe so quickly as his large frame enveloped you.

           “I’ll see you tomorrow Coach,” he said as he pulled away from you and winked.

           “Have a good night Nate,” you smiled. As he walked away you shut your door. Walking further into your apartment, you plopped down on the couch and got your phone out of your bag. You saw you had a few new followers on Instagram, some from the team and a few of their significant others. Mel had tagged you in a picture, and you saw it was the one you had all taken, along with one of just her, Gabe and Linnea. You went and posted the picture as well, captioning it “I’m not sure what I like about Denver better. This team, or the view?”

           You busied yourself the rest of the day and checked your Insta around dinner again. There was a comment from Tyson. “This team is the view.” You couldn’t help but laugh and be thankful that you ended up in Denver.

tags: @bqstqnbruin​ @avsfans95​ @andreiaafaria​ 

[gra-sonas]

Whatever these so-called "major spoilers" are is it too much to ask the writers that at least one be Malex related?? I feel like the sudden promo bomb less than a week before the premier has featured Echo content heavily (Max is dying, Liz is happy but not, they'll make a decision about their relationship aka be together in the end, blah, blah, blah) but nothing about Malex whose relationship is supposed to be equal to Echo. Oh, we know Michael is sad Alex is with someone else 🙄🙄🙄.

Oh, we know Michael is sad Alex is with someone else 🙄🙄🙄

AND WE'LL HAVE TO WATCH THE SEASON TO SEE WHAT (AND IF ANYTHING) WILL HAPPEN 🙄🙄🙄

Is2g, if that's a sentence anyone dares to utter in reply to us asking about Malex spoilers after this onslaught of Liz/Max/Echo spoilers...

The interviews so far have only featured Liz/Max/Echo stuff (since only Jeanine and Nathan have been interviewed, apparently). It's great for fans of the ship, but as a Malex shipper - or even just a fan of Alex and Michael individually (not to mention the other core 8 characters), it's hard not to be upset bc we've barely gotten anything so far.

If it's about the availability of actors for interviews, I'd understand if they couldn't arrange for more interviews (JUST TELL US INSTEAD OF MAKING US GUESS OMG), but then Chris could've done an interview to tell us about the other characters. I'm fairly certain all major entertainment outlets would've been happy to release it...

Also, what's been the point of more than a year of absolute secrecy around S3, when mere days before the premiere all these details can suddenly be revealed??? I just don't get it.

If it's okay to reveal detailed spoilers now, they could've revealed more detailed spoilers in the Q&A instead of keeping things so vague, we barely knew they were talking about the show. We would've loved to be able to speculate based on some solid facts.

But sure, we're supposed to be excited when we still know so little about S3 as a whole, and what's in store for all the characters. 🙄

(I am still excited, but I'm also salty af and really rather annoyed, why are they so fucking terrible at communicating with fans???).

(Also, I don't want less content for Echo, I want more content for everyone else - and yes, especially Malex - in case that wasn't clear).

[hopevalley]

Season 8, Episode 11: Changing Times

Well, as it turns out, my second Covid vaccine kicked me down hard. After sleeping for quite a long time, though, I’m tired of sleeping and ready to try and get this write-up done.

Surprisingly, or...perhaps not so surprisingly, I don’t think I have that much to say about last night’s episode. I think we’re just too close to the finale for me to feel “safe” in guessing/hoping for anything in particular.

Let’s hit up the plot points like before:

The Triangle

Carson & Faith

Rosemary’s Purpose

School District Problems

Jesse’s Disappearance 

The Triangle

I’m probably one of the few people who liked Nathan who felt like the whole beginning scene was super weird and uncomfortable. Homegirl held his hand for one second in the last episode and now she’s going to warm his serge by the fire (while he just stands there awkwardly??? He could have done that himself while she got him some tea or something idk) and then dress him???

I think we’re meant to see that as her going back to...I don’t know...old habits die hard or something? But she was barely married for any time at all and it’s been three years since Jack died. No way would she be so far into those old habits that she’d fall back into them with Nathan lmao.

Like, it’d be a REALLY GOOD PLOT for a character who had been married for years and lost a spouse (cough Abigail cough) but considering the circumstances it felt like a cheesy fanfiction! I wanted to like it, but I just felt weird about it. Tonal whiplash out the wazoo.

Especially when we had to watch Lucas drive by and see Nathan’s horse at Elizabeth’s house. 

Lucas sadly watching Elizabeth talk to Nathan was also awkward, but at least it gave him the courage he needed to break things off with her.

You’d think I’d have a lot to say about the triangle, but I’m saving all of that for some kind of...post-season discussion. Who is she going to pick? Nathan seems like the most logical writing choice, but it could yet be Lucas. I genuinely don’t care who she chooses so long as she picks someone.

--

Carson & Faith

I like to hate on these two a lot, so you might be surprised to know that I’m enjoying their storyline. I’ve criticized this series over and over for never bothering to portray realistic relationships and one thing I can say about Faith and Carson this season is that things actually feel...plausible.

I also appreciate how they try to tie Carson into the town a bit more: he talks to Henry and Minnie and even Lucas trying to figure things out! It makes perfect sense to me; how do you choose between someone you care about/the potential life you could make with them, and a career that you’re really and truly passionate about?

This is the most interesting Carson has been since Season 5.

Anyway, the pudding scene was genuinely funny, and a great way to break up the stress that I’m sure we were all feeling about his impending proposal. Faith’s reaction to thinking he might propose was...pretty telling. I really wish they hadn’t saved so many dangling plotlines to solve in the final episode, though. I was hoping Faith and Carson’s storyline would be fully figured out in the penultimate episode so that we could let him go (or whatever) in the season finale. It just seems to me like it would be a good, smooth ending for them.

Also, for what it’s worth, they tried doing this kind of plot with Frank in Season 5, but it was rushed and pulled out of thin air; he’d never shown an inclination toward pastoring toward dying children in the past and it was clear that they just needed to write him off the show. With Carson, this sort of plotline works VERY well; he was a surgeon, and he was passionate about it, but that passion took a hit when his wife needed surgery and she died on the table under his hands. He’s had some time to move on from that and process his feelings, so it makes sense that he’d find that passion again. I just wanted to point this out because it’s interesting how well it works for Carson and how...well, not-well it worked with Frank. I really felt like with Frank, it was just a storyline that could have been given to anyone with the same success rate, whereas with Carson they took a look at the character and what we already know of him, and built the storyline specifically for him. That’s good writing, babes!

Anyway, Carson trying to propose in the vague hope that Faith will come with him, even knowing she doesn’t want to leave Hope Valley, is pretty manipulative and awful, but it really goes a long way toward making his character feel like an actual person. Like yeah, he does actually want the best of both worlds. Do you blame him?

--

Rosemary’s Purpose

I know a lot of people are really into this storyline but I found it boring. The only good part was when Lee called the other desk in his office “hers.” Everything else just felt like a bit too much to come to the conclusion that she should run a paper. We already had her “advice” column in the paper and it was...amusing while it lasted, but eh. I just don’t see good storylines coming for her from this angle, especially when they went the route of her finding out she wants to start the paper back up to share information with the town. Are we really going to trust Rosemary’s integrity when it comes to writing news stories, especially when MOST of the time the things she’ll be allowed to write about are, you know, who grew the biggest cabbage? It makes me dread the potential for Round Two of Nosy Rosie.

I dunno. I used to really like Rosemary but this season’s been pretty rough on her character. Good for you for wanting to find your passion career, but most of us work so that we can eat, not for a fun way to pass the time and stay busy. :/

--

School District Problems

Mr. Landis is right and Elizabeth is an idiot. Sure the school board is being assholes for no reason (as if they’d care if one blind child was sitting in a classroom in one western town lol), but Elizabeth’s really going to dismiss his concerns about how she can juggle the added work necessary to teach Angela while also keeping up with everyone else?

It sucks that Angela will get left out, but Elizabeth should be working with Mr. Landis to come up with a plan to teach Angela without sacrificing the education of her other students. Better yet, she could rely on her friends for advice. Like Rosemary.

Still no apology there...

Anyway, a projected 100 new kids? That’s outlandish. The only way that will happen is if they open a factory in Hope Valley, and even then it could take years. I MEAN, WHERE IS THE HOUSING GOING TO BE FOR ALL THE ADULTS THAT WOULD GIVE YOU A HUNDRED NEW STUDENTS LOL. I think we have to assume the plotlines are connected.

I also find it hard to believe the board would care about Elizabeth being certified to teach Angela. Where else is she going to get an education? It’s 1918 in the middle of almost nowhere???

This show drives me nuts with its attempt to be a “Frontier Show” while also shying away from the characters actually being stranded/cut off from society at large. You still had unlicensed teachers teaching in western towns in this time period because nobody cared!!!

ANYWAY, if Union City was like 3 miles away I could see them trying to combine schools. But it isn’t. So.

I dunno. I hate this plotline. I feel like they stole it from a better show (Road to Avonlea, where the bigger school was just a few miles away and it made sense to consider combining the schools for a better education system for the students as one-room schoolhouse teaching was proven to be less effective) but didn’t bother to consider any of the logistics of the storyline.

Maybe it’s my passion for education and history that makes me hate it, though. I know too much to find this storyline believable. I should also mention that I haven’t enjoyed Elizabeth’s role as teacher for a very long time. (I think they suck at writing Elizabeth as a teacher.)

I’m just not interested in wherever this is going to go because I can’t imagine it’ll have a lasting impact.

The only good thing I can say about the whole plotline is that I REALLY LIKED HOW BILL CAME OUT OF IT. I think he’s the only person who knows how to speak to Elizabeth. She struggles with blunt honesty at first, but ultimately tends to appreciate it, and that’s pretty much what she always gets with Bill. Also, the scene where he shuts her down didn’t make her look stupid, either (just worried/anxious), so I could appreciate it.

--

Jesse’s Disappearance

I couldn’t care less about this plotline if I tried. Jesse’s gone missing in the mountains before (was it last season? I don’t even remember because I didn’t give a damn about it then either) so this felt like a multi-reused plotline...for the same character, no less.

It’s also poorly implemented. Why doesn’t anyone else care about Jesse? Why is Clara pouring her heart out to Lee while her friends are failing to support her in the slightest? Why should any of us care when we know he’ll be fine?

It just feels so forced for the sake of drama, and it’s made 10x worse because there’s too much else going on at the same time.

Also, how convenient that they have to tell us how hard-working and dedicated Jesse is to his work to force this plot to even make sense... C’mon, he has never been a particularly dedicated to work. They just needed to explain why he would have left the car so that he could be “missing.”

Boring. I also don’t care that much about their “stolen” money.

The only good thing in all of this is seeing how soothing of a voice Lee actually has. 

--

The best parts of the episode:

Henry calling Florence “Flo” GOT ME. It was so surprisingly cute???

I love Bill, and he really came out of this episode looking great! Finally, it seems they’re done writing him as a grouchy old man who hates everyone! In this season (and particularly in this episode), he is allowed to be capable, smart, helpful, loyal, and in possession of a great deal of integrity. I couldn’t believe that guy tried to bribe the judge in town right off the bat lmao...but the way Bill handled it felt very in character—very reminiscent of him from S3 or 4. He never shuts things down immediately, preferring instead to get more information to use against his, erm...opponent. Should he need it, of course. I was really happy to see him written well in this episode.

HENRY’S LETTER FROM HIS SON. STARTS OFF WITH “DAD,” AND SAYS PS. I LOVE YOU AT THE BOTTOM. Good for Henry.

Fiona’s backstory! Finally, we get some FIONA LORE. Neat.

PUDDING HANDS CARSON. 

[miss-kittys-magical-library]

Last Christmas

Words: 2900

Warnings: Here we see the smut chapter. Fluff and smut.

A/N: again thanks to my homies @joz-stankovich and @robertsheehanownsmyass for encouragement!! Tag list: @magic-multicolored-miracle @elliethesuperfruitlover @super-unpredictable98​ @bisexualnathanyoung

Chapter 3- White Christmas

Violet unlocked her door and dropped a handful of bags in the foyer. The mistletoe and pine still softly twinkling where Nathan left it made her flush at the memory of their kiss. She shook it off as she struggled to drag in a large heavy duffle bag she collected from the casino.

“Hey, Seamus Finnegan!” she gave a shout and smiled to herself. “Come help me with your shit! Also you've got eight hundred messages on your phone.” Violet finally faced her apartment and gasped. Nathan had decorated while she was out.

White lights trimmed the door to her balcony. The island where they ate earlier shared a similar style to the one above her front door: Pine and some bows and lights scattered throughout. There was a six foot pine tree in the corner by her television showered with white lights as well (in fact all the lights Nathan used were white. Some twinkled, some were stagnate). There were ornaments of every shade of purple, flowers and silver tinsel littered the tree, and again the pine around the wood of the table her tv sat on. Any bow used was a deep purple with silver trim.

“Oh, Nathan.”

That's all Violet could whisper as she ran her hands along the bough that lined the kitchen island. She knew in her heart he would open his mouth and ruin the feeling of contentment and she had right now. Something witty or obscene, so she kept quiet and allowed it all to soak in.

Making her way to the Christmas tree, Violet reached out to touch everything. It was real, solid. Nathan made all of these with his.. magic? She couldn't believe that’s what it was. Magic. He was magical.

His face certainly is magical, too she thought to herself. Cheeks hot as the sensation of his tongue in her mouth flooded her memory. It's been so long, Vi. What would it hurt?

Except it wasn't just about wanting to sleep with Nathan. He challenged her with his smart mouth. Always tacking on a statement that would get him the most attention. That he couldn't just say anything nice or complimentary without sexual or sarcastic wit sprinkled in. But he was vulnerable with Violet when he was still locked up and just last night as he lay dying in her arms. When Nathan trusted someone his walls came crashing down.

And he could be selfish, but so far he used his powers for others. The money he tried to steal to give Marnie and someone else’s baby a better life. Violet knew the young mother didn't steal the poker chip, Nathan gave it to her and told her to take off so she wouldn't get caught up in his mess. The decorations and breakfast this morning, carrying her to the couch instead of leaving her on the floor. That asshole’s tongue at the club. Even trying to comfort Violet as a knife stuck out of HIS chest.

And Violet assumed he drove everyone insane, himself included. Yet he survived. Or found a way. He survived being homeless and whatever went on in London after that storm that affected him and his friends (She googled it, would bring them up later). He even survived prison; for a guy like Nathan that was impressive.

Violet liked some of her clients. She even struck up friendships with the better of them. ACTUAL friendships where they called and hung out whenever her schedule allowed. But this was a tiny seed planted in her heart that started to grow and blossom like the flowers on her Christmas tree. They weren't supposed to see each other ever again, and Violet would be able to uproot her feelings for the flirtatious Irishman and throw them away.

Except he was in her apartment, occupying more than just physical space. With his stupid green eyes and even dumber way he laughed loudly at all of his own jokes before anyone else could. Let's not even start on his stupid, handsome face caught between boyish and a man like puberty couldn't make up it's mind during Nathan’s late teen years and just decided to linger into his twenties. Or his weird body with the baby Bambi spindly legs but muscular arms (with dumb scene kid tattoos) and that chest she touched. With all that death she figured he would be cold, but he was human. Hot blooded, warm-skinned human.

God dammit, Duval. You can't do this. He's probably just doing what he does best when it comes to you. Surviving until he gets home to London. Plus, he's like, way too young for you.

Her sisters were gonna have a field day with this tomorrow at dinner. Would Nathan even want to go with her? She was so lost in her thoughts, that she only just noticed the flowers decorating her tree were her namesake, violets.

Somewhere far behind, Nathan cleared his throat. Violet still jumped, plucking a flower off as she did. “Hope you don't mind I jazzed up the place. Rather boring for a bird like you,” he said with a devilish grin. “I wasn't sure what ye liked. I closed my eyes and t’ought of you and all this happened.” He swept his hand around the room.

“It's rather thoughtful for you.”

“Don't you mean thoughtful OF me?”

“No I definitely meant FOR you” Violet challenged.

For only the second time since they met, Nathan was rendered speechless.. Mouth agape, thick eyebrow furrowed in confusion as he grappled for a comeback and failed. It was only when Violet looked at him struggling that she understood what was going on with her guest as he casually lounged against the wall.

Nathan was wearing one of her sheets wrapped around his lithe body in a makeshift toga. A tinfoil halo laid crookedly on his shaggy head. Violet also took notice of the outline of his member under the sheet. She couldn't help but gawk knowing he was naked. He didn't bother with the wings, as if he was “angel” enough for what he thought he was doing.

Violet laughed out loud and covered her mouth to hide mirthful giggles. Tears sprang to her eyes, and at one point she felt out of breath. Nathan, meanwhile, had a crimson climb up over his face. His eyes betrayed that for once maybe there was some sort of embarrassment going on. He crossed his arms self-consciously and rolled his eyes.

“Are ye done having a laugh?!” just a smidge of hurt in his voice. “Last time turn myself inta a sexy angel!” Nathan jerked his hips and sneered.

“You look so cute! You halo did me in! Be honest,” Violet pursed her lips to express another giggle, “What are you doing?” She could feel the answer before he said it.

Nathan waltzed over to just a few feet from Violet. He ran a hand down the length of his body with mischief in his eyes, “Who me? I go on top, love.”

“Not if I have a say in it.”

Nathan’s mouth hung open in disbelief. “What if I get there first?”

“I've got way more experience than you do. And I always come out on top.”

There was electricity in the air.

“Key word being come,” Nathan’s voice came out sleepier than usual.

His eyes drifted from Violet’s down to her mouth then back up as he teeth bit his entire bottom lip. If that was meant to be seductive it worked.

Violet felt out of her body when she clung to the back of Nathan’s neck so she could bring his mouth down to hers. Their tongues doing battle as she got her fingers wrapped up in the back of his head. Nathan’s strong hands on the curve of her waist so that he could bring her lower half onto the bulge under the sheet. She moaned unintentionally into his mouth.

Nathan was a little aggressive the way he almost choked Violet with his tongue. She bit into it between playful and defensive causing him to back off. Only breaking the kiss to remove her shirt. Their bodies molded together again as they made out in the living room.,

His hands kept flitting over her body in quick succession like he couldn't decide between her shoulder blades or her ass. Making up his mind instead to start fumbling around with the clasp of her bra. To Violet’s delight and surprise he managed to unhook the thing and helped her slide it off.

In a whirlwind Nathan picked Violet up so that she could wrap her long legs around his thin body. Violet took note that he was stronger than he looked as they stumbled through the hall. Tongues at war again while Nathan crashed Violet into a wall where he devoured one of her breasts.

“Ow,” she winced but giggled into his mouth. Her nails deep into the skin of his shoulders and neck for balance.

“Not sorry,” Nathan mumbled.

He bit at a nipple harshly before sucking on it and repeated this back and forth. Growling into her chest with his face inside her cleavage. Violet laughed louder than she meant to at the absurdity.

“OI!” Nathan cried, but joined in the laughter this time.

Now they lumbered towards the bedroom, Violet tugged on his hair and cried out as his tongue flicked and devoured her nipples softer than before. Once inside, Nathan literally threw Violet back on to her bed towards the pillows.

“What the fuck?!” Her face hurt from smiling and laughter. Afraid of what might happen to her expensive Versace panties, she took them off before Nathan could tear into the fabric himself.

Violet bit her finger, her skin goose-pimpled in the cold air of her apartment. Her patience began to grow somewhat thin even as her sex started to pulsate at the sight of Nathan’s erection under the toga he fought with.

“Do you want help?” she offered.

Nathan waved her off and it fell to the floor. His cock surprised her with the still attached foreskin strained against the head. Then she remembered most European guys were still intact.

Violet's view was mostly a short one because Nathan crawled across the bed towards her. That Lord of Chaos shit eating grin from ear to ear as he palmed her knees. He spread them till they touched the sheets. He sucked on her collarbone and pumped a finger or two deep inside Violet. The palm of his hand meeting her sex causing her to buck unexpectedly while he repeated himself a few times. Her actions only encouraged him to keep going

“Where did you learn any of this foreplay? Porn? Trial and error? Juvenile girls with low standards?”

“D. All of the above.” He groaned into Violet’s neck. Fingers still gliding in and out of her.

“Have you ever been with an older woman?”

Nathan startled Violet by staring at her all of a sudden. “How old is older woman?”

Violet grimaced, “Nope. Nevermind.”

Before long, Nathan stopped using his hand and all too hastily started to lap at Violet. His tongue swift and sloppy over her sex not even bothering to find her clit. Rapidly he licked at her slit like she was an ice cream he tried to eat before it melted. It wasn't unpleasant but it wasn't exactly getting her off.

“Nathan?” she cried out the question. “NATHAN!” louder.

He raised his head, mouth glossed with her wetness. “Ahyep?” His eyes heavy with desire.

“This is oral sex, Lucky Charms. Not a fucking pie eating contest. Slow down and put your mouth here,” she brushed fingers over the top of her sex and spread it enough to show him her clit.

Nathan’s eyes widened and followed her finger to the bud of nerves she all but pointed at. “So that's what it looks like,” he marveled.

Violet glanced heavenwards but a part of her felt bad. “I'm being serious, has no woman EVER told you how to get her off?”

Nathan littered her thighs with kisses from the knee towards her pelvis. Making his way up the other to the opposite knee. He smiled at the way Violet’s body arched into the sensation. “Nah. Usually get a quick toss in then never see ‘em again. Marnie was my first missus.”

“Well then just use the tip of your tongue and make small circles.” Her breath caught when Nathan obeyed. “You can suck on.. Like. Fuck,” her hips writhed under his mouth “and just..” she mewled and lost concentration.

He caught on quickly. The rhythm of his tongue matched the way Violet rocked herself into mouth. More and more rapid he worked his tongue between circles and sucking. His actions and her wrapped up in a cycle of give and receiving

Violet vibrated. One hand clawed at Nathan’s neck. The other clutched the headboard as she felt electricity course through her. She bent forward at the power of her unexpected orgasm. The hood of her sex contracted around his tongue, liquified, she screamed his name.

Nathan pushed himself up and laid down on top of Violet before she could get her bearings. His tongue deep inside her mouth again as the head of his cock twitched and poked at her cunt.

“Na-Nathan, what are you doing?” she managed to catch her breath.

“Getting a toss in. Ye had yours, now it’s time t’give us a go. Right?” he teased her with the head slick already with his pre-cum.

“Not without a condom you don't.” Violet wedged her hands between her chest and Nathan’s to push him away. She searched around in her nightstand drawer, hyper-aware of the immaculate knife placed back inside. A flash of his dead body, but she held up a condom instead.

A kiss puckered on lips that fell. “A what?”

“You don't have condoms in Europe?” her eyebrow curved.

“Well sure but I've never used one.”

Nathan was so matter of fact it took Violet by surprise. Still, he took the package from her, hesitating to open it. He was rather tentative about what was inside.

“You've got to be fucking joking,” Violet took the rubber from him in haste and rolled her eyes. “I don't know where your dick has been.”

Nathan kneeled over her legs, his cock at perfect attention. “Aw COME ON!” he whined. “They're mostly clean council estate girls! Once there was one of those Thai ladyboys,” he stroked his chin, “but I didn't even realize my cock wasn't in a fanny”

“Fuck me.”

“I'M TRYING, SWEETHEART!! NO ONE’S EVER SHOWN ME HOW T’PUT ONE ON!”

Violet softened once more and sighed. She laid the condom on her chest and took Nathan by the waist to make him scoot towards her. For shits n giggles she raked her nails down his hips and he buckled with slight pain and pleasure. Violet smirked but took his cock in one hand while rolling the rubber over the shaft and down to the base expertly. She kissed his stomach, erection twitching as he came in proximity to get mouth.

Violet traced a fingertip over the stars he had tattooed down his pelvic bone. “What the hell possessed you?” She gazed up at him through her bangs.

Nathan caressed her cheek down to her lips where Violet sucked on his finger. She nipped playfully at it waiting for an answer. “It's shooting stars (stairs) all the way down t’ the milky fucking way”

Violet immediately regretted her decision to ask. Again. She had to remind herself he wasn't immature per se, more like stunted. Nathan had a good heart under the cushion of sarcasm and arrogance. A heart she placed the palm of her hand against to feel its steady beat.

“I'm only joking. Was a good place t’ hide it from mum. We can shag now right?”

Violet laid back on the pillows and opened up to him. Without hesitation, Nathan plowed into her. That pelvic bone collided with Violet’s as the breath escaped her lungs. Sweat gleamed along his chest and forehead mixed with the scent of her sex as his pace became almost ludicrous. There was pounding and diving into the hilt. As far inside of Violet as she allowed.

This is actually ok, she thought to herself as she attempted to match his speed and failed.

Violet laid under Nathan while he rutted like a wild animal. Breathless and panting as he attempted multitasking: Kissing her and fucking her. He failed at least one and opted to immerse himself in her hair as his body spasmed a release so violent and sudden all that escaped Nathan's throat was a strangled cry.

He collapsed on the pillows beside Violet and almost immediately passed out. She merely snorted, rolled away to check the time. It was then she felt soft, cold pinpoints on her bare arms and chest and hair. What was going on outside in the Nevada desert she registered as happening inside her bedroom.

Violet rolled over to face her lover. Snowflakes covered his bangs and long eyelashes. She held out her hands to catch giant fluffy flakes. Those same flakes fell inches high on her balcony but nowhere else. Violet snuggled into the chest of the man who slept beside her. Lost in his ecstasy, it appeared that he made it snow.

Nathan had given Violet her first white christmas.

[izzy-b-hands]

Kloktober, Oct. 16th: Dethstaff or Klokateers

Klokateers/Dethstaff for this one, really. Since it doesn’t matter what you call them, if they’re in Dethklok’s employ, they risk death daily. 

Synopsis: It’s Annual Klokateer Remembrance Day, and Charles is Feeling It a.k.a. having emotions and it is A Lot for him. But then, it’s a lot for the Klokateers too. 

TW for death and mourning. 

My love to all who read/like/reblog!

“This is always a hard day,” Charles said, and sighed deeply.

He meant it. He wasn’t an overtly emotional person, but he had to interview, hire, learn about and interact with every Klokateer. Whether he wanted to or not, he knew many of them incredibly well, which made it all the more difficult to bury them. 

This day, Annual Klokateer Remembrance Day, was the hardest day though, even beyond the individual funerals. 

“Thank you all for being here,” Charles continued. “We do offer this day off, for all who wish to commemorate it privately. But you all are here today, and that shows great strength and bravery. I appreciate your care for each other, that is evident here.” 

The crowd of unmasked, in street clothes Klokateers was something else to face. It was odd, to be able to see all their features, to make out one from the other more easily than when they were in uniform. 

A reminder that while they were dedicated to the literal death employees, they were still people. Still human. 

“We have candles available for all who would like them, and the period of non-denominational prayer and remembrance will begin in five minutes,” Charles said, watching as they filtered up front in a careful queue to take candles from the boxes near the stage. “After, the boys have prepared video speeches that will play. We know that it can be a bit...raw, seeing them in person on this day, so they have been sent on vacation for the next few days. After that, the open mic period will commence. As always, you may come up and eulogize any fallen coworkers, in whatever manner you like. If you have prepared music, please hand it to Dick, who is handling our mixing for the event.” 

Dick Knubbler, who had been keeping to the wings of the stage, leaned out and waved gently, wincing at Charles as he leaned back. 

He couldn’t blame him. There were a lot of tears and open sobbing this year, and it was all perfectly valid. It had been a rough year for their staff, somehow even more of a bloodbath than usual. And that took a toll. 

It choked him up, five minutes later, watching them all in their various forms of prayer, or deep thought. Heads bowed, shoulders shaking through quieted tears. 

They gave everything for this job. He would do the same. But how could he ever explain it to anyone outside of the Dethklok empire, should anyone have ever asked?

He didn’t think he could. You either were ready to die for the boys, for the job, or you weren’t. 

That had factored in when he had helped the boys tape their speeches as well. They’d been less tone-deaf than last year, but even so, his editing had been required. 

Nathan’s was first. 

“Hey guys,” Nathan looked uncomfortable. He had insisted upon sitting on his bed for the video, for reasons Charles hadn’t felt he wanted to know. “So...a lot of you died. And that sucks, and we’re really sorry about it. You do a lot for us. Uhhhh....like the time I was really drunk, and I threw up in my own hair. One of you washed my hair for me, and braided it after, and that was really cool. I got told that guy died in an accident with the jet...so, I wanna say I hope he’s doin’ good. Wherever dead people go. Braiding hair in heaven, ya know? Um...yeah.” 

Pickles was next. 

“So, people dyin’ sucks,” Pickles had, somehow, been sober for the video. It shocked Charles, but Pickles had insisted on staying put together for it. It was a nice but surprisingly mature thing for Pickles to do. “And I know that saying that doesn’t make it easier to deal with. You gotta...feel it, ya know? Feel the pain. Cry a bunch. Scream. Maybe kick something, or break a lamp. We got lots of extra lamps, if you need to do that, just ask Charles about it. But yeah...do all of that today, okay? For me. Maybe get drunk or stoned if ya gotta, but be safe. We don’t want any of ya dying during this thing, after all. Anyway. We love ya, and everything you do.” 

Murderface had been the hardest one to film, mostly because Murderface didn’t want to film it at all. “This isch kind of schtupid, if I’m honest. I mean, my parentsch are dead, and I don’t do anything like this about it. Whatever, Charlesch is doing the ‘shut the fuck up’ hand gesture. Look, we’re schorry a bunch of you die all the time. You do good work, and dying isch rough. But hey, other people in the world are gettin’ fired from jobsch and dying in the street. At least that ain’t you, right?” 

Skwisgaar had filmed his outside, with one of the yard wolves sleeping in his lap. Charles felt like the wolf helped, oddly enough. Like watching a puppy sleep, or something. Cute and soothing. “Yous guys ams the backbone of this place, but you does dies an awful lots. And that ams somethings regretables. But we don’ts wants you to dies, if that helps any. The jobs ams simply a dangerous one, but yous all knows that. Keeps up the good work, and wes will tries to gets less of you killed.” 

Toki’s was...a mess. But a well-meaning and sweet mess, at least. “We loves you guys,” Toki sobbed. “Ams so sorrys you always dyings so much. You don’ts deserves that. You makes me Hot Pockets all the times, and gets Pickle weed, and braids Nathan’s hair, and I thinks a few of you fucks Skwisgaar which ams nice-” He brushed tears from his eyes. “Since he ams arguably the ugliest of all of us. But enoughs about how yous hold backs your vomits over him. You little guys ams the best. I loves you.” 

Charles watched as Dick switched everything over to the open mic, and sighed. He couldn’t decide if he wanted to stay for the whole thing, or to slip out and leave them to it. He didn’t have to worry about them, he knew that. This was a holy day for everyone, and they always behaved well. Dick could handle the emcee duties, if needed. 

But that wouldn’t be right, to leave. The part that was perhaps hardest to admit, was that his own hand played in these deaths, in various ways, even if unintentional. 

He owed it to the lost Klokateers to stay, so he would. 

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

What You Deserve

A/N- This is not actually part of the story, its a unused story that I spent a couple weeks writing so I didnt have the heart to delete it although I scrapped it from the original story line. So please know that I did use some of these scenes in my rewrite. 

Summary- 5.7k Curtis Evertt and Y/N. Early Years. You sit with a dying member of the train and listen to her talk about her late husband, and the idea of Soulmates crosses your mind. Do they exist? 

Warnings- Death, Almost a Non Con situation. Curtis having doubts that hes good enough. Boom, got them all I think. 

You sat with the older woman, Sheri for some time that day, perched on the end of her bunk, one leg folded underneath you and one dangling over the edge, her hand interlaced with your own. Sheri was dying your mother informed you that morning, and you simply couldnt let her pass off all alone. Your fingers interlaced with hers in that moment, yours young soft and supple, to her knobby jointed ones, age spots sprinkled across what felt like paper thin softness, like you press to hard it would fall apart. Every now and then a weak wet cough would spring forth, and you would lean forward to pat her mouth softly of any spittle that happened to escape. It was the least you could do for her, try to let her keep her dignity.

“Child, you shouldnt be here watching this.” Sheri would sputter, hazy eyes narrowing at you, knowing you wouldnt leave even if she was to send you away.

You shrugged, and resettled the blankets. “Where else would I go Sheri? Mom and Dad have everything all set in the medic bay, and I got lonely. Who better to keep me company?”

She snorted and coughed once more, raising her hand to wipe at her mouth before you could. “Hmmm, well Curtis comes to mind.”

You blush a bit and look away, which she grinned seeing your lovesick reaction. “Uh huh... Sheri, hes just a friend. And hes got better things to do. Like getting ready with McGregor.” Sheri rolled her eyes at you, and shifted to make herself more comfortable. “Child, ive see the way you two look at one another. I might be old, Im not blind. If you two would just admit your feelings are more then friends, then who knows. Might be the best thing you ever experience. I remember when I told Nathan how I felt. He was all stumbling over his words, spilling it as well.”

You chuckle at her memory, remembering Nathan well when you first came on the train, he was fiercly protective of his wife, and doted on Sheri, loved her with his last breath. You encourage her to speak more of her past, how Nathan and her had a whirlwind romance that ended with the two of them eloping. How when her father found out, he banned her from the house, and the first home she shared with Nathan was nothing more then a room with a bathroom, it was all they needed to start. “It got better, he was accepted to a university, and worked as a janitor at night, I was a waitress in a small off the interstate diner, along with babysitting. It was hard, but we appreciated all that we had.” Sheris eyes slipped closed and she mumbled. “Okay, Im gonna nap now, come back later Y/N, and we will talk some more.” the womans head tipped to the side, and you stayed long enough to be sure she was sleeping.

Drawing your way out, you are sure to slide the curtain closed for her privacy, and start making another round to see to other people, chat with them, just see if they need anything in general. You dont notice the wandering eyes following you, weaving through the people till you got to a quiter part of the tail end. You didnt notice, not until its to late when an arm shoots out in front of you, making you pause momentarily as it blocked you. “What the... Eric, what do you want?” You try to duck under his arm, but the mans grasp on your arm pauses you. A glance his way showed a handsome young man, blond locks curling around green eyes, that glinted coldly at you, and he firmly without any choice of your own backed you against the wall. “See youve been playing little home nurse again Y/N”

“Just helping mom and dad, can you please let go?” You try tugging your arm from his grasp and his other hand came up to your face to trace the curve, obviously not ready to loosen his hold, for whatever reason you would clam up around him, your heart fluttering and your breath quickening. Some would think it was innocent attraction. But it was more fear of what he would eventually do to you if given the chance. 

“When you going to let me kiss you huh? I dont see why you keep fighting me on this.” He hovered closer, his breath washing over your face and you wrinkle your nose at it. It was hot and sour to you, you tried to pull back but there was no where else to go, so the back of your head would thump against the cold metal wall.

“Im not, I dont want to and you cant change my mind.” You wriggle once more trying to get him to stop digging into your arm. “So how about you go find one of the other girls? I know there are plenty who want to be with you.”

“To easy, I rather like the one who denies me” His voice dropped deeper, making you panic sightly. His eyes, you hated the way he would stare at you, following you from wherever he was, like you were a prize to be had. "I figured it's about time I change your mind about it though." You strain out of his touch on your face and go to push against his chest to stumble him back.

"I said no! Fuck no would I ever be with you, let alone kiss you" you snap at him, turning to leave, put distance between you two, back in a crowd. Eric was to coward to try to anything with people around. He snarled though, wrapping an arm around you.

Effectively he pinned your arms helpless and your back against your chest, falling back harder then you expected, making you helpless, his hand clasped over your mouth, effectively muffling any protests you had. "What you think your to good for someone like me sweetheart. If your good enough to get Curtis's dick wet, think you can mine as well without this much of a fight." Your eyes widened at his words. I haven't, were not, stop... Your panic is washing over you, and he manipulated your head to fall back to his shoulder, lemmegolemmegolemmego, you try twisting out. Then he pressed his face in your neck, and bit you, what started as a sloppy kiss turned into a bruising bite, screaming at the shock of pain and you try kicking him hard enough in the leg behind you to drop him. The tread of your boot slid down the inside of his leg, and he pushed you away from him to crash you against the trains wall, hard enough to bounce you off, making you groan from the harsh impact.

Erics hand whipped you around, effectively pinning you with his body. No way to leverage a kick again, and hands pinned your arms down to keep from attacking. "Fucken shit head!" Your voice raised into yelling at him, where was everyone? It was eerily quiet and no one around, he smirked at your struggles, dawning on you when you saw how turned on, felt how turned on. That foreign bulge dug into your belly. "Keep struggling Y/N, just makes me hard for you, so cute thinking you don't want this."

"Your vile Eric, like those front end pigs" nothing but disgust dripping from your tone, trying to hide your fear. But he knows, it just widens his predatory grin knowing your words were masking the fear coursing through your veins. His lips hovered so close, mocking tone as he brushed them barely against yours, as you tried tilting your face away. “Come on Y/N, just one little kiss for me. Do it and I will let you go.”

You glare at him and spit, right in the fuckers face, it runs down his eyes and nose, and you smirk at him as he starts cussing and wiping his face on his sleeve. “You little fucken cunt whore! Nasty pig think you can get away with that shit?!” His hand releases you and goes to hit you when a grasp catches his wrist, wrenching it back. Both yours and Erics eyes go wide in surprise, and you see Curtis glowering behind him, firmly twisting Erics arm hard, then harder again he snarls out. “She sure as fuck is gonna get away with it. I think she told you no”

Curtis jerked Erics arm further and a crack was followed by Eric screaming and letting you go, you slid away from his grasp, Curtis jerking him forward to take where he had you pinned before. They were evenly matched in size, but Curtis had him crushed between his body and metal, his face distorted as you glanced up. It struck you in this moment just how opposite these two men were. Curtis never once raised his voice in the time youve known him,but he had to raise above Erics squealing out in pain and anger. “When a person tells you no, It fucken mean no. You owe Y/N an apology.” He pulled Eric off the wall, and kicked at the back of his knees to drop him in front of you.

Curtis loomed over him, his arm still firmly twisted up between his shoulder blades, and growled in the mans ear. “Say it, or Im going to wrench it right off your body.”

“Im sorry!” you could see the effort it took Eric to say it, but Curtis clearly wasnt satisfied.

“AGAIN!” This time he really roared, Eric cowering a bit, and remorseful, he started again.

“Im sorry Y/N, I promise to never touch you again!” Curtis glances at you and nods that its okay, he had him firmly and you stepped forward, grasping the mans hair, and tipping his head back.

“Touch me ever again, or ANYONE on this train, your dead, do you hear me Eric? I will have no problem watching you die, either by my hand or another. Am. I. Fucking. CLEAR?”

“Yes! god yes, just let me go, it wont happen again.” Eric pleads, and you step away from Eric, and circle around to Curtis’s side. Shoving him harshly away, Eric rolled to a stand and clutched his arm, racing away as fast as he could. The coward, would probably make up some lie to cover face when he made it to your father went to reset the arm. You stood next to Curtis, still fuming. Your fear from earlier forgotten, now you were just enraged watching where the coward disappeared.

“Hey, he aint gonna try messing with you again.” Curtis let his hand rest against your shoulder, looking down at you. He couldnt help but admire you in your rage and fury. Your cheeks were flushed red, and whisps of your hair curled around your face, your eyes bright as you dragged in air sharply to blow it out. Then you turned your gaze, softening just looking at him, and could see you start to loose that edge of your temper. He did that for you.. Curtis gaze softened in return and you turn into him, sliding your arms around his waist and pressing your face in against his chest.

“Thank you for looking out for me Curtis.” his hands braced against your back and seemed to envelope you. If possible he would just hold you like that for alot longer, but you pulled away, keeping it just friends. Maybe you noticed the way his heart jumped, or the way his throat caught in his throat. And it had been that way for monthes now, seeing you in this whole other way. Since that night you fought him, trying to defy that you would ever eat again. Something shifted that day, and yet he held back from telling you, mentioning it. Honestly he didnt deserve someone like you, for all the blackness in his soul. It was better you two just stay this. Stay friends. 

“Your welcome Y/N, I came to let you know Sheri, shes asking for you specifically. Your mom asked me to come get you.” Curtis was about to walk you back, but your eyes widened, and you sprinted up the aisle and out of sight before he could even think to catch up. Unsure of why you were rushing, he followed along behind, and hovered nearby, seeing glimpses of your hair as you were ducked in the bunk, and worried about intruding, he inched forward a bit enough to hear you, make sure it was all okay. Your voice was soft, almost sorrowed as you spoke. 

“Im here Sheri, Im sorry I didnt come sooner...” 

Unintelligible to Curtis at the moment, it only sounded older, raspier and you gave a small chuckle at whatever was said. 

“I already told you, were friends, Curtis and I.” your voice seems to be teasing at this, and guilt at eavesdropping, Curtis turned away from the two of them, those last words echoing in his minds. Friends. Thats all they were, and all they would ever be. He had to accept it. You werent really his, and he needed to stop feeling responsible for you.  The thought alone made him feel slightly depressed and heavy in his chest, hollow. It made him feel hollow, and he fell right in line with the others shuffling to the front to collect there daily rations. 

You curled up near Sheris side, in the time you left her, she just gotten worst, and the both of you knew it really was just a matter of time now. For a while Sheri fell back into stories of the past, mixing You and Nathan up, once in a while she will talk to you like you were her husband. Her soft knobby hands grasping yours, and a smile etching on her tired face. 

“Im so tired Nathan, whats it like?” She would say with her eyes closed, and you with your head slightly bowed, trying not to let your tears fall yet, you put on a smile instead and nod softly. 

“Yea Sheri Dear, its nice. All love and kindness. You never hurt, your always warm and we can be together.” 

“But is there Hershey Bars Nathan? And dont you lie to me, cause I always know.” 

You laugh slightly at it, barely remembering them yourself, but you do your best. “Of course, every day I will get you all the chocolate you want.” 

Sheri hums as if happy, and her eyes open, looking up at you. “Oh child you dont have to stay.” Back to herself again, she folded her hands around yours and patted them softly. “Thank you for sitting with me, Nathan told me hes waiting for me, and Im ready to go... Im ready to see him again, My Nathan.” She slowed her movements and drifted off to sleep. At some point your mother checks in on you. “Want me to sit with her and you go get some sleep?” 

A gentle shake of your head and smile, youve done this before... the silent wait, the death watch. “No, its okay. I will see you in the morning.” Your mother nods with understanding, life on the train, these past 10 years made you grow up faster then you should. It did for all of you. 

You sat there with her, refusing to leave this time, still holding her hand, that was limp and warm in your own, tracing over her knuckles and along the top of her hand, aged, weathered. Nothing really last forever, and in these thoughts Sheri drifted away, in her sleep. Just as she wanted. 

When you felt her just, become a body once more, you let your tears run free now, falling in the womans blankets, while you readjust her to cover her completely, shifting to a stand a bit weak legged from the hours you were there. You went to find your mother, but see shes sleeping, both your parents are. Looking up and down the aisle, you really dont want to be alone, not now. Not after having to say goodbye. It was moments like these you missed your little brother, having someone to hold in your arms and remember all the good memories through your sorrow.

Without even thinking about it, you wander, and soon your standing in front of a bunk youve never been into, but you knew who was there. You could hear him snore softly, and shift in his sleep. A soft rustle of his coat, a shadow in the darkness. Your heart catches, and it aches. It aches for your friend, for how excited she was to see her husband again. How you dont know if she really was though. “Curtis?” Your voice is soft, your not even sure you said it. But within seconds he sleepily stuck his head out, and hand wiping at his eyes and brows coming together in concern. “Y/N? Whats wrong? Are you okay?” 

You nod softly and maybe you shouldnt, it was such an odd request but it bubbles right out of your throat into words. “I dont... I dont want to be alone, please?” Your gaze lifts and it takes him a few seconds to register what your asking for, when it clicks, he doesnt even hesitate, his hand reaching out to grasp yours and help you up. Maybe he should send you home, send you back. But your looking so fragile in the dark, alone. 

When you settled in, Curtis felt the bunk warm up between you two, and you laid curled up near his side, not touching , but nearby. Your breathing was fast paced and uneasy. Nervous... Fuck shes nervous. He turned to his side, and reached out to grasp your chin lightly to look up at him, since you had your face tucked down. “Y/N, want to tell me whats going on?” Curtis figured it was best to get to the bottom of what was bothering you, why you came to seek him like this. 

“Do you believe in soulmates and such Curtis?” You start to loosen up, folding your hands under your head as you roll to your side as well, looking back at him. Curtis brow furrowed a bit at the very odd question from you, and gave a light shrug at it. “Im not entirely sure Y/N, I never thought about it honestly. My folks werent exactly the most loving towards each other, kinda like... “ He tried to think of how to compare them to that you might remember. “Al and Peggy Bundy from that comedy. I dont know if you would even know what Im talking about. But anyways, always kinda mean to one another, but they just stayed together. Soulmates? I dont know if they exist. Why?” 

You vaguely recalled what he was talk about, the theme song playing a bit through your mind, you remembered your dad watching it, but you never paid attention to what he was watching. “Yea I know what your talking about Curtis. I was sitting with Sheri during her last bit, and she thought I was her husband. It just... she talked to him like they hadnt missed a beat, although its been years. I did my best to give her answers for him. I just, think I witnessed what that would be.” Curtis reached out and wrapped you up in his arms, understanding now that you were saying Sheri was gone. Doing that sit was never easy. Clearly this one effected you. But certainly not in the way he fully expected. 

You let him pull you in close, twisting to lean in against his chest while he held you, his hand was rubbing up and down your back in a comforting manner. It lulled you to close your eyes, and after a few moments, you heard him speak. A rumble in his chest making you stir to look up at him. At this angle, you couldnt see his eyes. “Before this, did you believe in that notion? Soul mates, think they could find each other in a life like this?” Curtis question made you pull up to sit next to him, so you could properly see him. See if he was teasing you, although he didnt have that tone he did when he was, or if he was being serious in his question. Crystal blue eyes stared up at you, with nothing but seriousness, and maybe hope? 

You studied Curtis for a few moments, and as sometimes happened to you, your heart seemed to speed just a bit, and you smiled at him softly, nodding. “I do Curtis, call me a hopeless romantic but we have to have hope right? Why not hope that we can find something so complete in even this hell.” You shrug and tip your head against your shoulder in that optimistic way before dropping your shrug. It was then he pushed up to sit as well, and he pulled at his lip with a drag of his teeth, seeming to think. You waited him out, your hands folding in your laps and looking at him wide eyed. 

Why do you look at him like that. His resolve weakening. You were so innocent looking up at him, patient as always for him to find the words, for him to decide, for him to get rid of that guilt that he doesnt deserve you in a way more then this. You were probably the reason he hasnt done anything to reckless and gotten himself killed. Fuck it Curtis... Resolve sliding over his face and his hands cupped the sides of your face, so soft under his touch, just as he knew you would be. Soft for him, he only wanted you to ever be soft for him like this, wanting to feel you press against him, the warmth of your breath whispering into his ear that you needed him. How many times had he thought this, wanted this. And now, you were staring up at him just waiting for him to tell you all this. 

“Can I kiss you Y/N?” He asked, ready to pull back the moment you looked appalled by his request, and you never utter those words, nothing changes but a quickening of your breath, and a nervous lick of your lips. Curtis wonders, have you ever been asked before? He was patient, he could wait, would wait till your ready. Its something you never admitted to yourself, but yes... you really wanted that kiss. A dip of your head and a soft “Yes” was given. 

Thumbs circled over her cheekbones, and you held your breath, waiting with anticipation. His features grew soft looking at you, raking over your face for a moment, searching for a no from you before he lowered his head and pressed his lips to yours, they were softer then you been expecting, and a bit lost in what to do. But Curtis started a light nibble, a press of his tongue made you gasp in surprise. A tentative touch of his tongue against your own, and you finally started to relax into it, exploring in your own way. Although Curtis controlled your first kiss, you felt free, a rush of your senses making you pull in closer, your hands sliding up his chest and around the back of his neck. 

Your fingers buried into the back of his shirt, and his own hands slid off your face, and down to your hips to pull you in closer, flushing you into his chest, and a rumbling moan crept from him. You were everything he knew you would be and more. Already it was rushing to his head, feeding a deep seated hunger he had been ignoring for the past ten years since arriving on the train. If he wasnt careful, he was going to do something he might regret, and pulled away, leaving you stunned, and giving a whimper at the loss of his lips against yours. How flushed you looked, shocked, even dare he say a hint of pleasure dazing your eyes. Your lips were swollen from his kiss, and that made him pleased he could make you look like this, just a simple kiss. 

Staring at one another, it was apparent that there was no going back now, no more just best friends. You were still slightly in a daze and Curtis laid back down, his hand circling your arm to tug you to join him. “We should get some sleep.” in which you stretched out next to him. You wanted to say something, but didnt know what. The kiss, unlike anything youve ever experienced and in the dark, your fingers moved to touch your lips, smiling at the memory of it now. The feelings you had for him, had been there a long time, and until now, you never let yourself believe it was a true possibility. 

Curtis on the other hand, well he was cursing himself out for what he just done. You were far to good for him and he should have known better then that. He didnt deserve you, not your honey sweet kisses he just got lost in, or the way you were so sweetly curled up next to him, trying not to intrude. Oh he was fucked... completely fucked. Why did he have to kiss you? He groaned inwards, waiting, just waiting for you to come to your senses. He was a baby murderer, it would happen soon, he was sure. You would remember what he done, and push him away, shut yourself off from him, and then in that moment, Curtis would be all alone on the train. Long after you fallen asleep, Curtis laid wide awake with his thoughts poisoning his mind. 

That next day he had disappeared before you could talk to him, and kept expecting to see him, but you never did. Which was odd, cause he had a habit of finding you at various points in passing. Only place he could be was Gilliams, and that alone made you worry. Not that Gilliam was necessarily bad, but people plotted with him, talks of trying to escape was always so sush around the man, like a man of many secrets. You scolded yourself at your thoughts, knowing Gilliam was a good man. Hes helped all of you so many times, was the leader of your people. If anyone knew you felt this way, your throat closed at the idea of what could happen to you. 

You were soon distracted by a 5 year old named Joey. “Hey, Its almost time, right Y/N?” he said excitedly as he ducked into the medic bay as if he owned the place, pulling on your coat and looking up with a glimmer of hope passing his face, you wink down at him, and take care of the last of the supplies. Whatever was going on with Curtis was going to have to wait. And you pushed the thoughts from your mind.

“Of course, whenever Minister Mason announces that we are passing over bridge, that means its a whole new year, and every new years what do we get?” tapping your finger on your chin, you pretend to ponder. “Oh what is it. They are white, and inside is all that yummy goodness. Hmmmm.... Frog eggs? No way to slimey! maybe a dog egg? Wait dogs dont lay eggs... Maybe a... “ at this point Joey is just about bouncing excitedly, finally bursting out.

“Chicken? Right Y/N Chicken Eggs?! I think they lay eggs.” a slightly confused look crossed his face. “Im not even sure what a chicken is.”  

“Oooh! Thats what they are. And chickens run around on two legs, flap there wings and are big fluffy butts.” You cross your eyes at Joey and mimic flapping your arms, making him laugh.

“Like Miz Scarlett?” He asks, and he says it so innocently, you have a hard time not laughing, pressing a finger against his lips. “No no, she certainly doesnt look like a chicken.” Although she did that one time her nice feather down coat split down the back and feathers scattered through the tail end. You all still found the occasional feather fluttering through the aisle. Plus the woman had the tendency to be a bit over dramatic, flailing her arms around whenever she had to prove a point. Joey always had been an observant kid.

The two of you chatted about what else New Years brought, while heading out into the aisle to return him back to his mother. “were gonna have a cele-celebratition?” You chuckle and repeat the word properly. “Celebration, and it will be something like that yes.” It wasnt much, usually just a bunch of people sitting around the gate, waiting for there only treat Wilford ever gave them on the train. But it always turned into a good time, people sharing stories, and once in a while a game or two was played. “Gilliam is gonna tell us right?” Joey asks, now looking concerned.

Your brows come together, and nod, giving his little hand a squeeze. “Of course Buddy, were not gonna miss out on the best day ever, right? I will come make sure your there with everyone else.” You smile at him to assure, and he pulls up, leaping into a lower bunk to crawl over to his mom. “Mom! Y/N said its almost new years, and we get chicken eggs and maybe we get to hear stories and... “ he ended up running out of air and took a deep breath. “and Miz Scarlett doesnt look like a chicken.” You end up covering your mouth,while his mom puts him on her lap and shakes her head. 

“Now Joey, you cant be telling anyone they look like chickens! Jeeze child, what am I going to do with you?” She tickled his side and he went sprawling across the bed, and rolled back up, the excitement tinging his face. “I wont, I wont... I promise!” The PA systems crackles, and you put your finger up to your lip to sush Joey, all of you tipping your head to listen. Minister Masons nasal voice crackled and stated. 

“We just passed the bridge, and another year on Wilfords Miracle Train. How lucky we have all been to be here for this miraculous day. Mr.Wilford is providing everyone a treat to celebrate, be sure to come up to the front in a ORDERLY fashion, and be sure to thank him for his bountiful grace hes bestowed upon us.” 

You roll your eyes to yourself for the fucking dramatics, but you tilt your head and sound excited for Joey. “Come on Kiddo! I bet hes got something real good for us.” The child looks to his mother for permission and she nods, sending him flying out of the bunk to grasp your hand and practically tugging you down the aisle, since its quite a walk for his little legs, he wanted to hurry. “Slow down Joey, we will get there” You laugh, and then Curtis sweeps past you and hauls the kid up in his arms, grinning at you as he turned around, and walked backwards, Joey, wrapping his little arm around his neck. “We got places to be, Dont We Joe?” The little boy gave a very serious nod and looked down to Curtis. “Yes sir we do.” 

“Okay, okay... Im coming!” You pull up alongside Curtis with a sigh like they were being ridiculous, and once they were in sight of the front, Joey started wriggling to get down. “Put me down Curits, I want to go get in line!” in which hes swung down and as soon as his feet hit the grate, he bolts away from the two of you. The both of you hang back while others crowd to form a line. You let yourself lean against his shoulder and look up to catch his attention. “Feels like youve been hiding on me Curtis.” 

“No, just been busy.” He glances at you and away, watching to make sure Joey doesnt get lost in the mayhem. Liar, hes always been a bad liar. You see right through it, and you dip around to stand in front of him. “Say that again Curtis, and mean it this time.” Your mouth curls up in a grin, and he growls a bit under his breath that he had been caught. 

“Listen, yesterday...” he starts, rubbing the back of his neck and looking down. “I took advantage and I shouldnt have.” 

“Curtis Everett, when have I ever done anything I didnt want to do?” You fold your arms over your chest and shake your head. 

“Well...” 

“That doesnt count and you know it.” Giving him a silent warning and he snapped his jaw shut. You step in closer and take a hold of his jacket, fiddling your fingers in it. “Listen to me closely, You didnt take advantage, okay, and Im not going anywhere. It wasnt bad, right?” 

His eyes widened and a shake of his head to get rid of the notion, he couldnt help but touch you again, his hands moving along your arms, up to cup your face again. “Absolutely not, it was... the best kiss ive ever had.” his face softened when he said it out loud. 

A slight blush crept in your cheeks, but to hear him say that, just made you more bold, knowing you werent wrong. You were ready for this moment, and never thought it was possible. “Then why do you fight it?” You asked as you slid up against him, and move to your toes to reach him, cupping the back of his neck, you bring him down to meet you, and more confident this time, you kissed him slowly. This one was yours, and the people started cheering around them at the announcement of the new year. But for Curtis, his world narrowed to the woman in his arms, nothing else existed or mattered for him. You fit in his hold, like you were meant to be. the soulmates questioned flashed through his mind and then you moaned into his mouth, and all thoughts went away for good. 

He knew in that moment, there wasnt going to ever be anyone else. He might not deserve someone like you, but he wasnt going to let you go. 

[ksuew]

The Rookie 2x11 Day of Death

Here is a crazy, sleep-deprived stream of conscious recap of the episode with a few predictions.

Opening scene, Lucy regains consciousness on a table, Caleb is giving her a DOD tatoo. I was so hoping this wouldn’t happen, but it does give the opportunity for a good healing story line and an awesome cover tatoo.

Next, Jackson goes to bring Lucy coffee and she isn’t home.

Lopez and Wesley are talking after she’s found him nearly dead because he’s mixed booze and pills.

There is a news brief from Rosalind

“5 years ago Detective nick armstrong looked into my eyes and Fulfilled his darkest fantasy and arrested me for Playing at slaughter” weird wording. I think Armstrong must have slept with Rosalind...

Nolan and Jackson are discussing the missing Lucy. Thankfully, Harper immediately sounds the alarm. When asked if Lucy just went home with the guy, Nolan says, “Lucy doesn’t do one night stands”. I could tell what Jackson said.

Next we see Lucy taped to a chair.

She’s trying to get into Caleb’s head, but it isn’t really getting her free yet.

Harper and Nolan visit his last victim but get no usable info other than timeline. It would be nice if she and Lucy meet up at some point. They could be a good support for one another.

They talk to Grace about How long it would take to suffocate in a barrel.

Surveillance footage

As soon as they say she’s been taken they cut to Tim. He immediately calls Lopez. She’s on her way. Love that friendship.

Harper knows Lucy is a fighter

Lucy proves that when she gets free, hits Caleb and runs for it. Wish She had beaten him until she saw brain matter, but I get the instinct to run.

I really hated watching Caleb kick her. That was hard to watch.

Armstrong’s pissed, I get it. I think it was right to send Nolan to talk to Rosalind (and he is the star of the show, so he has to play a big part).

Poor Tim, he talks with Lopez. He blames himself for pushing Lucy to go out . He was nearly in tears. “She hesitated and I pushed her right at him.”

Nolan visits Rosalind. I still don’t trust the prison guy, Hernandez, i think he’s in on things. May come up in later episodes. Nolan doesn’t get much, but tries the contraband angle.

Love that Wesley gets to help by finding the contraband smuggler.

Now it’s Lucy being marched to the burial site. He makes her climb into the barrel, has it wired to record. The ring!! Lucy you beautiful genius! She throws her ring onto the ground as she climbs into the barrel. I loved her parting quote, “you’re gonna be dead long before i am”. Gotta say, I’d have ripped those camera wires apart out of spite. No way I would have let him have the satisfaction of watching me die.

The next scene was one of my favorites. Tim and Jackson pull over the smuggler. Tim goes all the fuck out from second one. Jackson looks kinda scared. One of my favorite linesof the whole episode: “I am responsible for a life that is in jeopardy and I will do whatever I have to to save her, do you understand?” The guy doesn’t want to give the info, Tim’s reply, “Because if you don’t I will pull you inside out”. Swoon

Tim takes down the guy he thinks is Caleb and demands “Where’s Lucy?” But it’s not Caleb. Poor guy’s disabled and gets tackled because Caleb stole his identity. So back to Nolan and Rosalind. He really doesn’t get anywhere, honestly, other than finding out she’s after Armstrong

Armstrong is a dummy and lets Caleb take him. Caleb was never gonna help or let her go. Sweet that he would sacrifice his life for hers. Lots of guilt there.

Lopez and sergeant grey find the photo of Lucy and presumably her phone. BUT WE DON’T GET TO SEE HER TIM LOCK SCREEN which had me seriously pouting.

Lucy’s in the barrel. This is so hard to watch. Cut to Tim looking devastated because he thinks they’re out of options but It’s Jackson and Tim who realize credit card statements could lead to Caleb. Then Wesley for the win, figuring out that Caleb will probably take Lucy to a place connected to Rosalind.

So Caleb and Armstrong get to the farmhouse. Caleb is jealous of Armstrong, “there’s so much you don’t know about her. I know everything “. He also told Lucy earlier that he didn’t understand Rosalind’s obsession with Armstrong. Again, I’m Pretty sure they had an affair before he realized she was the killer.

Okay, finally Tim and Lopez use the data Wesley has gathered and find the address.

Now the scene of Lucy singing dream a little dream of me. All we hear is her as everyone rushes to find her. We see Nolan and Harper get re-routed toward the farmhouse and Tim, Jackson, Lopez, and Sergeant Grey getting in a helicopter, but all we hear is her singing until her voice trails off and she presumably passes out from lack of oxygen. I can no longer sit at this point.

Nolan and Harper get there first and Harper shoots Caleb. They try to keep him alive even calling Grace to help, but he was never going to tell them anything anyway. He dies.

Loads of people finally start to show up. Nolan shows Lopez the live stream of Lucy in the barrel. Tim doesn’t really look. Honestly he looks so upset and worried that he might throw up. They decide to just start searching and hope for the best.

Tim pulls it together and starts to search with Jackson, but tells Jackson to go left so they can cover more ground.

Everybody is searching. At this point I’m nearly screaming at the TV, “Come on Tim!!”. (And I’m pacing and getting really close to the tv) My dog gets so spooked she starts barking 😂. I NEED for Tim to be the one to find her. The scene keeps cutting to all the people looking for her...

And then, it all comes together..

He sees the ring catching the sun. Lucy has saved herself that badass queen. He starts digging with his bare hands and calling for help “I’ve got her!”. I am literally dying. PS. Lucy doesn’t wear that ring to work, so he’s noticed it from other occasions. I would so love if that ring comes into play in the future...

So, he’s digging, everyone joins in with hands and shovels.

Tim is the one to open the barrel.

Tim is the first one to touch her and asks for help getting her out (I think this is the first time we’ve ever seen him touch her)

Tim is the one to check if she’s breathing

Tim is the one to give her mouth to mouth and start compressions

Thankfully they don’t leave us in suspense for too long before she starts to breathe again. As soon as she realizes she is out of the barrel and alive, she starts to sob

Tim is the one to gather her in his arms and rock her and tell her it’s okay.

God, I was a mess! They could have let that scene go on for just a touch longer, but I won’t complain. It was so touching. I love how everyone deferred to Tim. No one tried to take over or move in. They all knew it needed to be him.

Cut to the hospital. Lucy is waking up and Tim is by her side reading a ridiculous teen magazine. Tim looks a little embarrassed/unsure (will she want me here? Is she mad at me?). Lucy starts with some playful banter and Tim makes her laugh right away. He looks a little unsure again. Lucy asks him if he’s been there all night. Embarrassed puppy denies it 3 times, which of course tells us he has, but doesn’t want her to know. Her little “um hm” tells me she knows he’s lying.

Grace comes in, says Lucy will be in the hospital for one more day. Mentions that Rachel just came by and will be back later 🙄🙄. Sorry, but can we be done with Rachel now?

Lucy looks to Tim and asks, “How did you find me?”. Just when I think he’ll get to mention the ring, Nolan comes in to claim credit and says it was his policing skills. (I’ll give it to you, Nathan, this show wouldn’t exist without you, so we gotta stroke your ego a bit 😂)

He gives her a big teddy bear, then Jackson comes in with flowers. It’s very cute and sweet. Lucy says the bear will stay in her bed because she’s never going on another date again. Grace tries to object but all 3 guys are fine with that scenario. As am I. The only dates she needs to go on are with Tim after she’s no longer a rookie for at least 6 months. Then he can evict the pink bear.

Tim totally sets up his own gift to her by asking Lucy if she’s hungry. She says yes, and as she’s about to say what she’d really like to eat, he’s pulling out a bag with her favorite veggie burger, extra pickles and French fries (as a romantic song plays in the background. I can’t find it yet, but the lyrics were “I’ll come and find you, come rain, come shine) Who won the gift name now, suckers? Better than a bear or flowers any day 😉.

She says, “you know me so well”, he smirks, goes full heart eyes, and says, “Too well”.

And that’s some endgame set-up awesomeness right there!

I would have been fine if the episode had ended there, but there was a bit more.

Wesley has gotten some perspective because of Lucy’s ordeal and is ready to go back to work. I think there are more setbacks to come for him, but it is a good first step.

Cut to Armstrong and Sergeant Grey. He invites Armstrong to his house to watch a game. He hopes Armstrong can cast out his demons and move on... foreshadowing!

Nolan goes back to speak with Rosalind to tell her she (and Caleb) failed and now all she has is her cell. She tries to barter a secret about Armstrong. I’m sure that will come back to haunt us. Like I said before, I’m pretty sure Armstrong slept with her at some point, but there is something else. Season finale kinda something else.

Overall, this was such an excellent episode of television. It literally had me out of my seat on several occasions. I feel like Tim knows he’s got serious feelings for Lucy but will try his hardest to suppress them because she is his rookie, and a fellow cop, and he feels like her abduction was his fault. I think that will become a bigger and bigger issue as the rest of this season progresses.

I think (and hope) that Lucy working with Harper will be a one-episode thing, but they will probably pull pretty far back on The Lucy and Tim relationship for a few episodes. The scenario was very similar to A Bones episode from season 2. Brennan was buried alive, Booth moved heaven and earth to find her, she did something brilliant that caught his eye when it seemed like finding her would be impossible. He dug her out and held her, but it was still a good 4 more seasons or more before they got together. I hope we won’t have to wait THAT long, but I don’t think they’ll be together by the end of this season. I do think that this episode is signaling that the show runners are definitely going to put Tim and Lucy together eventually, which makes me very happy.

For now, I just hope they’re back as partners in the same shop soon. I need to see them together because they’re the best part of the whole show. I want them to allow Lucy to process her trauma. I want a conversation between Lucy and Tim about it not being his fault. I would hope Tim would end things with Rachel. I want the ring to come back into play at some point. First because i want Lucy to know that what she did was a big part of what saved her, and I want a pining Tim to hang onto it like a talisman.

[bigskydreaming]

@elfysparkles88​

#listen it's a universal problem#I love my mans Scott#everyone is always bagging on him WHY#Scott Summers#X-Men

Its because Scott Summers is inevitably compared and contrasted with those around him, and he has the great misfortune of running in the same circles as an all-star line up of like....just the absolutely most Ridiculous People to Ever Ridick.

We’re talking about a guy whose dad was abducted by aliens and from there went on to decide, welp, guess I gotta become a space pirate now, jaunty earring and all, no, shhh, shh, no, there are no alternatives, I gotta, no, I said no - SHUT IT, I SAID I GOTTA BE A SPACE PIRATE NOW ITS THE ONLY WAY. Oh btw, meet my fianceé. She’s an alien mercenary who is a little like a skunk but don’t call her that to her face or she’ll shoot you in yours. How’s that for swoonworthy, am I right, son?

We’re talking about a guy whose own son was a literal sixty year old Grumpy Old Man overburdened with world-weariness, wildly unnecessary shoulderpads and arthritic joints when Scott was barely hitting his third decade. With said son now randomly being a moody sixteen year old again, with a pet sentient sword he talks lovingly to, because apparently Nathan Summer’s take on teenage rebellion was to act out by being all LOL Fuck Time Travel Paradoxes and then rebelliously zooming around the space/time continuum while blasting a soundtrack of MCR probably, until he finally got a bead on his older self and shot himself in the face while being like “its not that I’m angry with you, I’m just disappointed” and look this is the part where your eyes are gonna wanna just glaze over so your brain can have a break, shhh, shh, don’t ask questions, just let it be, it happened, its a thing.

We’re talking about a guy whose brother rode a merry-go-round of “Am I a good guy this week or am I a bad guy because Reasons or sometimes Brainwashing or sometimes I Don’t Even Fucking Know, Look Don’t @ Me Bro, I Just Fucking Work Here, I’m Not In The Loop” for most of his twenties until dying in a fiery explosion only to inexplicably return years later as a coma patient who finally woke up one day and said “Whoa, just got back from tripping around the multiverse and boy do I have stories cuz apparently I’m the Nexus of All Realities, so hah, SUCK IT, big brother, and yes that is TOO a thing, shut up, LET ME HAVE THIS. Oh and also btw don’t spend a lot on your wedding gift for me and Lorna because I’m gonna leave her at the altar once I realize that I’m actually more in love with the random nurse lady who changed my bed pans while I was in a coma having a romantic rendezvouz with her in Paris in my brain courtesy of her psychic eight-year old kid trying to play matchmaker for her cuz like, she doesn’t date much apparently but its whatever, this is FINE, I have no objections. Ugh why are you looking at me like that Scott, no, I don’t need to “talk” with someone about everything I’ve ‘been through,’ ugh I’m HAPPY you asshole, god, why don’t you ever want me to just be HAPPY ugh you just have to control EVERYTHING with your over-bearing BS like “I am concerned your decision-making processes might be affected by all the people tampering with your decision-making processes over the years” like umm DID I ASK? No? I didn’t think so? YOU’RE NOT MY REAL DAD, SCOTT, UGH THAT DOES IT, IM RUNNING AWAY TO BE A SUPERVILLAIN AGAIN AND THIS TIME ITS TOTALLY YOUR FAULT, YOU’LL BE SORRY WHEN I CRY HAVOK AND LET LOOSE THE DOGS OF WAR THIS TIME FOR SURE, AND OMG FOR THE LAST TIME I KNOOOOOOW THAT’S NOT HOW ITS SPELLED, ITS ABOUT THE AESTHETIC SCOTT, ITS CALLED HAVING A SENSE OF STYLE, UGH, LET ME LIIIIIIIIIIIVE.”

We’re talking about a guy whose other little brother randomly showed up and started killing people one day being like “hahaha surprise, bet you all forgot about me, PS, I’m REALLY FUCKING MAD AT YOU ALL FOR FORGETTING ABOUT ME” because the world’s most powerful telepath made everyone forget about him and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day they all had once and this is fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine, this is normal. As is the way his newly discovered slash remembered slash resurrected slash recently returned from spending the last decade fucking around as a disembodied energy ghost on a rock up in Earth’s orbit little brother then decided the Earth just wasn’t big enough for the both of them, the both of them in this case meaning both him, singular, and his Angst, as a wholly separate and towering entity in its own right. So instead he fucked off to space and decided to conquer a vast alien empire and spend the next several years being their god-emperor or whatever until he got bored with that. And also he kinda sorta killed their dad for a bit but whatever, its fine, he got better, and then he also kinda sorta died for a bit himself but whatever, its fine, he got better, and there was that whole interstellar war between himself and the Inhumans but whatever that wasn’t even his FAULT, Scott, THEY STARTED IT, god, do you ever stop JUDGING ME AND MY LIFE CHOICES and PS I’m still mad at you for killing Xavier, you fucking asshole, not because you did it but because like, you KNOW I wanted to do it, I had a whole fucking villain monologue moment about it and everything, you were literally there, UGH WHY WON’T YOU LET ME HAVE NICE THINGS?!?! YOU ARE THE ENEMY OF FUN AND JOY AND HEY MAYBE YOU WERE THE REAL VILLAIN ALL ALONG, DID YOU EVER THINK OF THAT? HUH? MR. I’M THE BOSS, WAIT WHO’S THE BOSS? OH YEAH STILL ME, SCOTT, I’M THE BOSS, YOU GOTTA STOP BEING A SPACE EMPEROR GABE BECAUSE YOU CAN’T BE THE BOSS, ONLY I AM ALLOWED TO BE THE BOSS BECAUSE I’M THE BOSS AND I SAID SO AND YOU GOTTA DO WHAT I SAY OR I’LL TELL DAD.” 

And that’s not even getting into how we’re also talking about a guy who basically ended up divorcing his first wife and suing for sole custody on the grounds of “Well, your Honor, she tried to sacrifice our son on a literal demonic altar in order to summon Hell to Earth to destroy everything just to get back at me after I left her. Yes, your Honor, I understand that is in fact Asshole Behavior, but there were extenuating circumtances, you see, the woman I left her for was my first love before her who I thought was dead. And also, she was literally my wife before my wife was. No, I don’t mean I was married before Maddie, I mean Jean was kinda pretty much already Maddie before Maddie was Maddie. Its this whole clone thing. Look, I’m just saying it was a complicated situation and I know I have my part to play in it, but I still stand by my conviction that trying to sell out our entire planet and species to the legions of Hell while using the innocent blood of our ten month old as the Golden Ticket to the Chocolate Factory was still a little over the top and not really the right way to handle it either. Also, I contend that I can provide a better home environment at the moment than someone who is insisting on being addressed as The Goblin Queen because what even is that, honestly, Your Honor, and also, she also brainwashed my brother into trying to kill me on her behalf, which to be fair does happen about every other month anyway, but still, like. Dick move, you know?”

And we’re also talking about a guy whose second wife who was kinda sorta his first wife but only in that It Ain’t Bigamy If Its A Clone Thing way....like, I mean. Its kinda hard NOT to come across as the bland one in the relationship when your second wife occasionally moonlights as the AirBnb of choice for a cosmic parakeet goddess of rebirth and fiery destruction who is pretty infamous for the ragers she hosts every time she pops into town for a visit, all smiles and (literal) sunbeams (of scorching lethality) and “Lol hey hot stuff, remember me?” As if someone who ate an alien civilization’s sun the last time she hit a Mood is like....really in danger of ever being “New phone, who dis?”ed. But that is neither here nor there, much like the sentients of Alpha Centauri Bumfuckville after she went all Goodnight Sun, Goodnight Moon, Goodnight Solar System on their corner of the galactic neighborhood, because.....tbh I don’t think she ever actually said “why” there. Its one of those things where if you don’t already KNOW why a cosmic parakeet goddess of rebirth and fiery destruction has decided its nighty-night time for this particular zipcode.....like.....that’s not really something you just ASK, y’know? Its....tacky, probably. Also, low on the self-preservation instincts, probably.

Plus we’re talking about a guy whose second marriage to Yet Another Woman It Probably Should Have Registered As A Bad Idea To PIss Off Like This ended in like....so, okay, this was a bit more His Bad than even Round One was, courtesy of a “Groundbreaking. Revolutionary. Show-stopping” reinterpretation of what was up until this point te much more ambiguous and metaphorically named “Mental Affair” concept. Though it must be said, Scotty always has skewed a bit more towards the literal minded in his personal approach to things, so, y’know. That tracks. But regardless, the pattern remains consistent here, as once again, its not always easy to register on peoples’ radar as anything other than the Plus One when your newest paramour prides herself on being both the entire planning committee AND star attraction of Victoria’s Secret (assuming that said Secret is Secret Aims at World Domination) Presents: A Renaissance Faire. But in an evil and also kinky way. Except now with sixty percent less evil on account of how Emma’s reformed these days, but not a hundred percent less evil because she’s not like, REFORMED reformed, cuz that would be boring, eww, could you imagine, no, you couldn’t, because she won’t let you and she can do that, she’s that good at telepathy and that bad at boundaries. Still the same amount of kinky as before though, but like. That’s just about Strong Branding. After all, at the end of the day Emma Frost is above all else, a good businesswoman.

But yes, she is also a big fan of the Aesthetic, with that aesthetic being Her Whims On Steroids because like they say, go big or go home, and Emma Frost does not believe in going home when she can simply acquire your home instead. Hate the game, not the player. She didn’t make the rules, she just came to win. Point being, its hard to follow up an act like Jean-Who-Is-Sometimes-Phoenix-And-Sometimes-Dark-Phoenix-And-Oh-Hell-She-Cant-Even-Keep-Track-So-How-Could-Anyone-Else-Really, but say what you will about Emma’s wardrobe, she’s more concerned with clothing herself in unapologetic take no prisoners ambition, and as such, her being the follow-up to Scott’s epic romance with his childhood sweetheart turned literal cosmic embodiment of fire and passion, like.....this was never a big checkmark in the con side of a pro and con list for Emma. It was more like oh, yes, hello there, Challenge Absolutely Fucking Accepted.

Which, y’know, all the points to House Frost for showing spine and boy howdy, that’s a spine alright.....but at the same time, going head to head with someone who is classified as a galactic threat when people are deliberately low-balling her, like, for no other reason than you’re bored and your manicure appointment isn’t for another couple hours.....like that’s the kind of thing where it has to be pointed out that there were possibly alternative options worth considering somewhere in between ‘having no spine’ and ‘spiting cosmic entity who can kill you with her brain by stealing her man and saying come at me bro because like....my spine, let me show you it.”

But again, just to reiterate the premise here.....our thesis here today is that Scott Summers Gets a Bad Rap For Being Bland or Boring or Not Standing Out, But In Reality The Issue Is Just That All The People He Knows Are Truly Ridiculous People.

In other words, Scott Summers is no more the Everyman of the X-Men than any of his Truly Ridiculous Friends and Family.

Because an actual everyman would have bounced out of that madhouse way the fuck back in Chapter One: In Which Things Just Got Ridiculous.

Cut to Scott Summers, in contrast: *looks around, purses lips, weighs options* Nah. This is fine.

See also:

His daughter, who didn’t so much arrive after the traditional nine months of waiting and preparing for a bundle of bouncing baby joy but instead just like...plopped back into the past as a full grown woman hailing from a dystopian future she was hellbent on preventing by any means necessary, even if that means had Scott frantically shouting RACHEL NO as she screamed RACHEL YES and sprinted straight at someone like Selene (a villain who has survived 17,000 years of pissing people off and making enemies of actual, literal gods) while thinking “oh yeah, I got this.”

(To be fair, she probably DID have it, or would have, if Logan hadn’t chosen that moment of all moments to have his once-centennial contemplation of “Wait, what if....murder is...NOT good?” Never underestimate the daughter of a cosmic goddess.)

Or see also also:

Scott’s original classmates, including Doctor Hank “I’m not an over-archiever, I’m just stress-eating because its lunchtime and I’ve only revolutionized two whole fields of scientific study so far today,” McCoy, Warren “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful, hate me because I’m a billionaire, wait no, I’m just kidding don’t hate me at all hahaha I’m too sexy” Worthington III, and Bobby “I may look cute and unassuming and like my only priority in life is video games but sike, I too am a potentially cosmic level immortal being of nigh-unlimited power or at least I will be whenever I get around to tapping that potential like I’m currently tapping xy up down A + BBA like a boss, now shhh, don’t interrupt me while I’m kicking ass at Mario Kart I said I’ll GET TO THAT LATER, ugh, JEEZ, my priorities are FINE, Scott, like get off my back already, you’re not even my real dad” Drake.

In conclusion:

Scott Summers is valid, and there may be legions drinking his Hatorade, but make no mistake, its not that he’s Less Than, its that every single person in his social circle is just that damn Extra.

[ravenbrenna09]

Sobbe Childhood Friends Snippet #2

On this epsiode of Brenna Avoids Studying because she’s avoiding it, here have some childhood friend Sobbe angst. Depending on how this next bit goes, it might end up not being reunion/makeup at the beach (years later), but we’ll see how it goes. I’m still gunning for it. 

@well-who-needs-angels-anyway

...

With Sander’s sudden and abrupt departure, combined with Nathan leaving for college and never coming home, Robbe clung a little too tightly to Jens. Sander had been Robbe’s oldest friend and Nathan was his brother, but both of them, constants in Robbe��s messy life, were gone, vanished like smoke and leaving Robbe clinging to fight for them. Jens invited him to the cabin and Robbe knew that Jana didn’t want him there but he went anyway. Moyo showed up too and that only pissed him off even more. 

Moyo and his homophobic jokes and comments, who also had no problem with Jens calling his ass tight and slapping him there. 

And, the worst part was Jens didn’t seem to realize the effect that it had on Robbe. 

Sander would.

But, Sander was gone. 

The night in the bathroom hadn’t been the first time that Robbe had considered the fact that he might’ve liked guys. In fact, his browser history could attain that. But, that night in the bathroom had been the final lock in the rattling of the cage, his feelings for guys breaking through with a fury. Robbe had known that he had feelings for Jens, especially with the lengths that he found himself willing to go through to break up Jens and Jana (even as he told himself it was because she was stealing his best friend away, and somehow that made him feel worse). 

But, that night in the bathroom had been his unlocking for his feelings for Sander.

All too quickly, his dreams of Jens, the one that made him feel dirty and guilty, Jens with his black hair and his too-long legs towering over Robbe, were quickly replaced by Sander, with his brown hair and his leather jacket and every single thing that they managed to do drunkenly in the bathroom at Senne’s party. Occasionally, Jens would still pop up, but only if Robbe forced him too, because he wanted to forget Sander because Sander had left and he wasn’t coming back. 

Robbe couldn’t imagine himself being with anyone else, didn’t want to, so he tried to fall into a blissful piece of whatever Jens had with Jana. And, surprisingly, there were a handful of girls that were more than eager to kiss Robbe, much to Moyo’s absolute annoyance. Robbe would date a girl for a couple of months, make out in her bedroom, at parties where everyone saw, let her push him up against the brick wall. He would stop their hands when they got too low, made up some excuse when they pouted, and had gotten pretty good at hiding that it didn’t do anything to him.

Sometimes, he wanted to try, to be normal, but he stopped because he knew that they wouldn’t do anything. 

After a bit, Robbe would make up another excuse as to why he needed to break up with her. He didn’t have time for a relationship, his mom was a little much, they deserved better than someone like him.

With each passing relationship failure, Jens and Moyo were loud in their complaints that he was a fucking idiot. Robbe pretended that he didn’t feel the same way because it was all an elaborate ruse to hide from them, hide from himself. The only person he wanted to be that close to was a guy, and that it was Sander, his oldest friend, but Sander was gone, moved to France, dropped off all contact, and never was going to look back.

He was never going to come back.

Until he did. 

To visit Senne. 

Robbe was half-propped against the brick wall of the courtyard, using his bag as a cushion to protect himself from the bricks behind him. This time around, his girlfriend was kissing him a little feverously, open-mouthed and tongue, and it felt a little too hot and heavy to be having before school had even started and somehow Robbe felt like that might’ve been the entire point. Her hand was pressed against his chest, moving faster and faster down his body, until Robbe managed to snag it by the wrist. 

His girlfriend let out a groan, looking up to stare at him. 

“We can’t,” Robbe started. 

“Why not?”

“We’re right outside of school!” 

His girlfriend started to respond back, opening her mouth in a way that should’ve been cute or seducing, but wasn’t, likely to fire off some flirtatious response about a bathroom or a shower, and Robbe prepared himself to deflect it. But, they’re both cut off. “Hey.” 

Robbe twisted, so fast that he might’ve been worried about his neck, feeling his breath leave his body and his blood boil in anger all in one coordinated, single flip. 

Sander. 

Despite having gone to France for almost a year, he hadn’t changed that much. He still wore dark jeans and a leather jacket, all for the aesthetic, and a David Bowie t-shirt. He had gotten taller, a little bit, and he now wore a pair of Doc Martens on his feet. He had dyed his hair a brilliant platinum blond and it looked a little too good for Robbe to be mad at him. He stood there in front of them like he had always been able to be there and his green eyes darted to his girlfriend with a guarded look on his face. 

No, Robbe inwardly hissed. He does not get be jealous.

“Senne is in the courtyard,” Robbe edged out, his grip on his girlfriend’s side getting a bit tighter. Sander’s eyes snapped towards him, his pupils dilating slightly, and Robbe forced himself to stare at him. “You might have to try a few times to get his attention. He’s been pretty wrapped up in Zoë lately.” 

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you too,” Sander started. 

“Now?” Robbe questioned, his eyebrows raising. Sander nodded. “I’ll see you inside.” His girlfriend looked confused, but nodded anyway, pressing a kiss to his lips, making it a little more filthy than a peck on the lips should be, before disappearing into the courtyard. Robbe crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you want?”

“Does she know?” Sander questioned, gesturing over his shoulder. 

Robbe swallowed. “Know what?” he questioned. 

“You’re seriously going to make me say it?” It’s a joke, light one at best, but Robbe is tired. 

“What?” Robbe questioned, glancing around. 

They were the only ones alone now, but Robbe didn’t want to have this conversation here and now. All it took was one person around the corner to catch steam in a high school rumor mill. Robbe was already dodging rumors and Moyo’s homophobic comments, to begin with, and if anyone heard what he was about to say, it would only make it worse. 

But, Robbe needed to know if Sander remembered too, “That you sucked me off in a bathroom at Senne’s party, disappeared without warning to Paris even though you’d known for months that you were moving there, and left me here wondering what the fuck I did wrong with no explanation?” 

Sander blinked, looking shameful, and somehow, that made it all worse.

“Is that what you were going to say?” Robbe questioned. 

Sander was quiet, biting down on his lip. 

As Robbe moved into the courtyard, which was loud and crowded, he turned back to Sander, who had feebly turned to look at him and replied, “Senne’s over there, wrapped up in Zoë, but I’m sure that he’ll be glad to see you.” 

“Robbe,” Sander was staring at him now. “How can I fix this between us?” 

Robbe didn’t have an answer, and Sander knew him well enough to know that, so he walked off into the courtyard, putting on the happy smile for his girlfriend, silencing her question with a kiss, and flipping off Moyo over her shoulder when he let out a catcall.

...

I’m going back to studying I swear. 

[ghstandpucks]

Cutting Edge ~ Nathan MacKinnon Ch. 2

A/N: Hey everyone! I hope you are liking this story! I’m having fun writing it! I got carried away with this chapter, so it’s a little long. Let me know what you think, I love hearing from you! Enjoy! 

Prologue

Ch. 1

“Are you joining us for strength training tomorrow coach?” Tyson asked. After his comment earlier, he had been trying to make casual conversation with you. You figured he felt bad and was trying to show you he was sorry for the way his comment slipped out. You were skating off the ice at the end of practice when he had caught up with you. You turned to answer him, but another voice cut you off.

           “She’s a figure skater Jost. She can’t do our conditioning,” Nikita Zadorov eyed you, but it was stated more as a challenge than anything else. And you were not one to back down from a challenge, hence your Olympic gold medal.

           “Says who?” you questioned, then turned to Tyson. “I’ll be there.” You smiled and walked off where you saw the other coaches heading to take off your skates.

“You know you don’t actually have to do the strength and conditioning with them right?” Casey Bond said, catching up with you. You remembered he was the strength and conditioning coach you had met earlier that day.

           “Yes. But I want them to know that I’m here to work with them, not just because I was placed here for a program that may or may not succeed. I want them to trust me,” you stated simply. Bond nodded.

           “You’re okay kid. If you feel like you are dying tomorrow, just tell me and I’ll make up an excuse for you to leave,” he said with a grin. You smiled back.

           “I’ll just die in front of them. Make Zadorov feel bad for challenging me,” you laughed as you started to untie your skates. Bednar heard what had happened and he just shook his head with a disbelieving smile. At least you were trying to be part of the team. On the other hand, Tyson had announced to the locker room that you would be joining them in the morning because of Z’s challenge.

           “You did what? Did you see how small she is? I’m surprised she never just snapped in half from falling on the ice.” Erik Johnson stated.

           “Figure skaters have to condition too though right? It can’t be that different,” Andre Burakovsky stated.

           “Ya, but we all weigh in around 200 pounds. She’s like what, 100?” EJ retorted. Unfortunately for them, you happened to be walking by outside the locker room on your way out and heard this.

           “I’m (Y/Weight) actually. Thank you very much,” you shouted as you kept walking. The boys seemed to freeze for a second, listening as your footsteps got quieter.

           “She’s fucking (Y/W) pounds! If she dies, it’s your fault,” EJ said to Z.

           “She’ll be fine. I’m sure she knows her limits,” Gabe tried to soothe the conversation. “We’ll all just keep an eye on her. I know that won’t be a problem for some people.” He said the last sentence as he turned toward Nate slightly. The man in question busied himself getting his equipment together, though he knew he would have looked out for you regardless. You on the other hand, were determined to show the team what a figure skater could do. You knew it was your chance to prove to the team you weren’t something fragile, but one of them. Someone who wanted to work with them and earn their trust, and you saw this as your way in.

~ ~ ~  

           You don’t think you had ever sweat so much in your life. You were keeping up with the team, but you were feeling your muscles already starting to shake. It wasn’t as if you have never trained like this before, you have just done different types of work outs. For figure skating, your work outs usually included ballet lessons and yoga sessions though. All of this was slightly ridiculous for a figure skater. You weren’t showing it though, again masking any emotion you were having with a smile.

           When it came time to sprint a short distance, you lined up with everyone else in two different lines. “How are you doing coach?” a voice asked from behind you. You turned around and smiled, not noticing Nate had gotten in line with you.

           “This is child’s play,” you joked, though you were sure you were as red as a tomato. Nate chuckled, admiring the fact you had hung in with them so far. When you got to the line, you hadn’t noticed Zadorov was in line next to you, and who you would be sprinting against.

           “Ready to lose coach?” he taunted you with a smirk.

           “I guess I haven’t told you something…” the whistle blew and you both took off. You pushed your legs as fast as they would go, and crossed the other line a second ahead of Zadorov. He looked at you surprised, catching his breath. “…I’m a fast sprinter,” you finished your comment from a few seconds ago. The team started to chirp him as some of the guys clapped you on the back as you walked back in line, proud of yourself.

           That was your one shinning moment though. Another hour later when conditioning was finished and the team had a short break before going inside and getting on the ice for a light practice, you snuck off behind the rink and thankfully found a trash can. After depositing the contents of your stomach, you walked away from the trash and leaned up against the side of the building, slowly sinking down trying to regulate your breathing. You hoped that this showed the team you were here to work, because you didn’t want to think about having to go through that again. Hearing footsteps coming closer, you looked up and saw Nate walking toward you. He slid down next to you and handed you a Gatorade as he took a swig of his own. “Thought you could use this, you seemed a bit shaky,” he stated. You laughed half-heartedly.

           “Oh God, did I really look that bad?” you asked, taking a sip and swishing it around your mouth as discretely as you could, embarrassed that he probably knew the real reason you came back here.

           “Not at all coach,” he stated quietly. You turned your head to look at him, and those same butterflies appeared in your stomach as yesterday at the soft look he was giving you. You smiled and shook your head.

           “You’re such a liar,” you joked with him, to try and snap whatever was happening in that moment. You knew it wasn’t professional to be feeling that way about him, especially with you just beginning to work with the team. “But thank you Nathan.”

           “Nate,” he said, sticking his hand out for you to shake, and that’s when you realized you were never actually properly introduced yesterday.

           “Y/N” you smiled, shaking his hand. After a few silent, but comfortable moments, Nate stood up and offered you his hand. You took it as he helped you up and both of you headed back to the front and walked into the rink. The cold air felt nice on your aching muscles as you and Nate went to your respected areas to change and put your skates on. Shortly after you were on the ice and Coach Bednar skated over to you.

           “Good to see you in one piece,” he joked. You laughed and shook your head.

           “Just barely.”

           “Well, I heard some of the conversations as the guys came in, and you definitely impressed them. I can’t believe you actually decided to stay for the whole workout, but it seems you’ve earned a lot of respect from sticking it out,” he said earnestly. You smiled to yourself and nodded.

           “That’s all I wanted,” you replied, overjoyed with what he had said. As the team started to take the ice, you added, “Do you think they’ll mind if I just sit on the ice the rest of practice?” Laughing, Bednar skated with you out to center ice.

           “Honestly, probably not. Just say you’re getting a better view of their blades.”

           “That’s a good one!” you laughed, and went to your corner to wait for your first group.  

~ ~ ~

           The week seemed to go by quickly after that. You had swapped out your coaching sweats for your practice leggings and felt much more yourself on the ice. You were also getting to know the team better and becoming fast friends with a few of them. Surprisingly, Tyson Jost was one of those people. You were only a few months older than him and after you had told him he had apologized enough to you for his ‘comment gone wrong’ as you jokingly called it, the two of you got along very well. It was still Nate who would give you butterflies though. And he was still equally intrigued by you.

           Friday after practice ended and the Zamboni had cleaned the ice, you decided to keep your skates on and glide back out. No one was supposed to be there for the rest of the day, so you decided to take some time and skate for yourself. Gliding around the ice, you smiled and started to hum, warming up a few jumps and spins, completely enjoying your time in your favorite place. You had been in your own little world while doing twizzles around the edges of the ice that you didn’t notice a tall figure off to the side watching you. Once you stopped your twizzles and looked around though, you spotted Nate leaning against the boards. You glided over to him, fixing the loose strand of hair that had fallen out of your ponytail as he tried not to make it seem like he was watching you. “What are you still doing here? I thought everyone left?” you asked as you got closer, stopping a few feet in front of him.

           “I was about to, but then I heard someone on the ice and wanted to see who it was,” he stated, rubbing the back of his neck. You nodded, unsure of what to say. Luckily, Nate filled the silence. “What you were just doing, that looked pretty cool,” he smiled at you.

           “Oh twizzles! Yeah, they’re fun,” you returned his smile. “I realized I hadn’t skated for myself this past week. So I figured with no one here I would enjoy the ice.”

           “I’ll let you get back to it then,” Nate went to walk away, but you spoke up without really thinking it through.

           “Do you want to skate with me?” you blurted out, slightly embarrassed that you had just basically asked him to stay. What if he was busy and didn’t want to? Or felt obligated because you were technically his coach. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” you added for good measure. Nate looked back at you and really took you in this time. You had put your hair up since practice, your cheeks red from the cold. He thought you looked adorable in your team USA tank top and skate leggings. He couldn’t help but smile and nod.

           “Let me go get my skates back on,” he stated. You smiled back at him and watched him walk away for a second.

           About five minutes later Nate stepped onto the ice with a few things. Though he stayed in his joggers that he had worn after practice, he brought out his gloves, some pucks, and two hockey sticks. You skated over to him confused. “What’s all that for?”

           “You teach me some figure skating moves, and I’ll teach you some hockey. As a coach, you should really know how to at least handle a puck,” Nate looked over at you. You eyed everything apprehensively.

           “Okay but like just a warning, I have no hand eye coordination what so ever. Why do you think I stuck to a sport that is primarily footwork based?” Nate chucked at your response as the two of you skated around the ice at an easy pace, allowing his muscles to warm back up from practice.

           “You can’t be that bad,” he shrugged.

           “Oh, prepared to be shocked,” you said with a laugh. Nate grinned at you as you started to twizzle again. As the two of you skated and talked some more, Nate was impressed by the way you could make every little movement seem incredibly graceful. After teaching him how to properly do a two foot and one-foot spin, he asked you about jumps. “I’ll teach you a loop. You don’t have toe picks so that one will probably be the easiest,” you suggested, showing him how to take off on the outside edge of his right foot while gliding backward. You demonstrated a single for him, and tried to give him pointers. “Not half bad,” you complimented while clapping as he did it.

           “Show me what you can really do with that jump.” He was curious to see what he saw on the video in person. You laughed and skated a circle around him to gain some speed, then jumped into a triple-triple loop combo with ease. When you landed the second one and looked at him, Nate let out a low whistle and clapped.

           “Nice coach,” he said. “And now that I feel totally inadequate as a figure skater, time for you to learn some hockey.” You rolled your eyes dramatically, but followed Nate over to the bench anyways. “Do you want a pair of gloves, or do you want to keep yours on?” he asked, eyeing your thin wool gloves.

           “Can I keep mine on?” you asked and he nodded, then holding out a stick to you and throwing the pucks onto the ice. You stood there awkwardly with the stick, eyeing it suspiciously.

           “It won’t bite,” Nate teased you.

           “I’m not so sure about that,” you replied, but followed him as he pulled a net back onto the ice. Nate turned back to you, silently laughing at how apprehensive you looked.

           “So first thing, which way do you think you would want to shoot. Right or left?” he asked skating to your side.

           “Probably right?” you questioned. Again, Nate chuckled at your uneasiness. You were an Olympic champion, surely you couldn’t be this nervous to shoot a puck.

           “Aren’t you friends with some of the Ducks? Have you honestly never shot a puck before?” he asked you.

           “Yeah I’m friends with a few, but only because I would do charity events with them. I’ve never been to their practices or anything,” you defended your lack of hockey experience. “Also, how do you know I’m friends with some them? I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned that.” Nate’s eyes went a bit wide, realizing you hadn’t said anything about it. He only knew from hanging out with Tyson and Andre after practice the day before and Tyson decided to stalk your Instagram page.

“Um…Tyson found out and has a big mouth,” he decided that was the safest way to go. Not that Tyson stalked you to find out if you were dating anyone because Nate couldn’t stop making comments about you. He didn’t need to say they came to a conclusion that you were single.  

“Oh, that’s why he followed me on Insta yesterday. That brat,” you laughed, having no clue behind the alterative motive. Nate chuckled nervously and decided to change the topic quickly before he said anything else that he shouldn’t. He started by showing you how to hold the hockey stick; where your hands should be placed. He showed you how to swing at the puck, and stayed a respectable distance from you doing so. He thought about skating up behind you and showing you everything with his chest pressed against your back, but he wasn’t sure it was a good idea. He honestly wasn’t even sure if you were actual friends yet, or still just his coach.

He was pulled out of his train of thought as you started to bounce up and down next to him and laugh to yourself. You had just shot your first puck into the net after a few failed attempts. And though it was no where at the speed that Nate had, you were still excited. He couldn’t help but smile at you adoringly. After a few more successful shots that had you grinning from ear to ear, Nate brought the pucks back over and stood in front of you. He got into a defensive stance and softly hit a puck toward you. “Now come at me,” he said. You stood there baffled for a minute.

“No,” you laughed in disbelief. Nate smiled and nodded.

“Come on. Try to score against me,” he encouraged you. You continued to stare at him, but when he didn’t budge, you semi-reluctantly gave in.

“Please don’t hurt me,” you muttered, to which he laughed.

“I’ll go easy on you Y/N,” he replied as you started to skate forward. Not having the best control of the puck, Nate took it from you easily. “Are you even trying?” he laughed.

“Hey! That’s just mean. I was,” you said, getting another puck. After you had failed a few more times, your competitive, stubborn side was starting to appear. You wanted to get past him so badly. You looked at him for a second, before skating forward toward one side, then doing a quick three turn toward the other, and to your surprise you were still in control of the puck and around Nate. You shot the puck into the net with an excited yell. Nate stared at you dumb stuck for a second, before a smile took its place as you skated back to him. “Did you see that!” you jumped on your toe picks.

“That was good,” Nate said, impressed. Yes, he wasn’t trying that hard to stop you, but he honestly did not see that one coming. “What did you just do?” he asked curiously.

“It was just a three turn. You guys do them too, just not as fluidly,” you shrugged.

“You should think about showing that to us then,” Nate suggested, gathering the pucks up. You nodded, not even considering that what you just did may be helpful. You helped him pick up everything, and the two of you took your skates off together. “So what do you think of playing hockey now?” Nate asked as you walked out to the parking lot.

“It’s not that hard. Maybe I should change professions,” you said with a smirk toward him. Nate let out a deep laugh and shook his head.

“I don’t know. I wouldn’t quit your day job any time soon,” he shot back with a wink. You played hurt.

“Ohh, that’s how it is. Well, it looks like you are skating extra laps on Monday Mr. MacKinnon,” you tried to be serious, but you couldn’t help break into a smile at the wide grin he was giving you.

“Do you even have the authority to do that Coach Y/L/N?” he asked. You thought for a second.

“I’m actually not sure. I’ll find someone who does though,” you laughed as you approached your Jeep, not even realizing he had walked you out to your car when his was in the other direction. “I had fun today Nate. Thanks for teaching me a few things,” you said as you got your keys out of your bag. Nate smiled down at you, debating with himself if he should ask for your number or not.

“Thanks for asking me to stay and skate,” he responded earnestly. You were both staring at one another, neither really wanting to say goodbye first. You caved though, not sure where to go from here.

“Have a good weekend Nate,” you said softly.

“You too coach,” Nate said, and turned around to walk toward his car. Before he got too far from you though, he stopped and turned back toward you. “Hey Y/N, can I get your number? You know, just incase I ever need to get ahold of a coach,” he wanted to cringe at his pathetic explanation for wanting your number.

           “Don’t you have the other coach’s numbers?” you asked, challenging him. He met your stare, and decided to go out on a limb to test the waters.

           “Can I get your number, so I can talk to you outside of practice than,” he said, a little nervous for your response. A blush then rose to your cheeks, that you were hoping was still hidden from the cold of the rink. You nodded though, accepting his phone when he handed it to you and putting your number in it. You handed it back and smiled shyly at him.

           “See you later Nate,”

           “Bye Y/N,” he said quietly, noticing that your cheeks had become a tinge pinker. He smiled to himself as he walked back to his car. Maybe you were just as interested in him as he was in you.

Tag: @bqstqnbruin​