#but he here some destiel trash stuff | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bazzledazzled · 8 years ago

Text

Hey? Anyone up for some High School AU headcanons for Destiel?

So Dean would be the new kid

I mean, I guess y’all saw this coming but ye he’d be the new kid

Now I making this an AU where they have normal(ish) lives so it isn’t because their dad is killing monsters and stuff

They do kinda live out of the Impala and go state to state so their dad can find a job

They have money, but not a lot of it

And they pretty much live somewhere until either they realize that there isn’t going to be any jobs there or John gets fired

So ye things kinda suck for them

But then again they’re the Winchesters so......

So anyway, y’know Dean kinda walks into school with this I-don’t-give-a-shit attitude bc he’s probably going to be gone within a month so at this point he doesn’t care

But ye ppl see this scruffy looking teenage boy walk in and immediately kinda step away bc wow he looks like bad news

I mean, he kinda makes friends and makes out with a few girls, but he doesn’t have any real relationships, platonic or romantic

And he’s fine with that bc that’s the way he wants it

He kinda learned that he shouldn’t get too attached if he’s just gonna move away again

But oh gods please help him for what happens next

So y’know everyone’s kinda going about their normal lives and stuff

And Dean goes to his locker to grab his books and stuff so he can go to his next class

He puts his locker combination in and pulls the door

It doesn’t open

He tries again

It still doesn’t open

He bangs on it

Nothing

He kicks it

Zip. Zero. Nada.

So ye he getting rlly frustrated with this crappy locker

And then he feels a tap on his shoulder. His green eyes meet cobalt blue ones

“What do you want?” he says, sounding irritated.

“You have to pull it up, then open it,” the boy says. Dean looks at him confused. He then grabs the handle of the locker, pulls it up, and ofc it opens

“Um... thanks?” Dean says.

“My name’s Castiel, but most people call me Cas.”

“Dean.”

THE FRIENDSHIP BEGINS!!!

So ye they kinda become friends but you know Dean is kinda a little distant and stuff and doesn’t completely trust Cas and yadda yadda yadda

But so like, Cas is an amazing artist????? Like soooooooo good it’s just literally beautiful

Dean wishes he could make something that beautiful but rlly he’d rather watch Cas paint a picture than do it himself

But Dean admires his art

Like so much

Like sometimes he’ll just sit with Cas and watch him draw or paint or whatever he’s doing

He asked if he could keep a few pictures

His favourite is one of an angel

Cas never draws Dean in front of Dean

Actually Dean has never seen a picture of himself that Cas drew

Bc Cas is kinda embarrassed that he literally just loves drawing/painting/sketching Dean bc wow he’s beautiful

Frick he thinks he’s crushing

But ye Cas definatly has a lot of drawings and paintings of Dean bc he can’t help himself

You get inspiration where you can get it and Dean inspired him

When Castiel painted his first picture of Dean smiling with a ton of radiant colours that’s when he figured it out

“Holy frick I’m in love with Dean Winchester.”

Cas is a little scared bc it’s Dean Winchester ye u don’t mess with him and having a crush on him is way bad news

Plus Dean is his friend like no friends are supposed to be off limits

Nope nope nope nope nope

But when u have a crush it’s a little hard to bury it and make sure it never climbs back out of it’s hole

So when Dean comments on his art or says something that nice to Cas, Cas blushes a lot and is at a loss for words

So beep bop boop Cas is very much in love with Dean and he knows that someday Dean is probably gonna rip his heart to shreds

Now Dean is trying very hard not to get attached to anyone bc he probably gonna leave in a month or so. His dad hasn’t had the best of luck looking for a job

But HOLY SCHNITZEL HOW CAN SOMEONE BE AS PURE AS CAS

LIKE HOLY FRICK THAT BOY IS TOO PURE FOR THIS WORLD

Dean would lowkey protect him at all costs

I mean, sometimes he can get a bit annoying and he isn’t the most talkative person but HOLY POOP DEAN LUVS IT

Dean just.... needs help

He tried sooooo hard not to let anybody past family into his heart but this boy did it in some how in some way

And he need help bc he falling for him and he doesn’t know what to do

So ye they both hopelessly in love but neither of them can see that the other likes them and they know that it will probably end in flames

So doot da doo one day Cas comes by the motel room for some reason idk maybe they need to study for something and Cas’ house wasn’t free idk

So Sammy is the one who answers the door and has literally no idea who this guy is bc wtw Dean who the heck is Cas???? And who names their child Castiel???? Like that’s child abuse Dean.

So Sam has to go find Dean to make sure that he isn’t letting in a random stranger and Dean just gets so annoyed bc Sam I told you my friend was coming over today my god

Now Sammy has heard about this so called friend bc Dean talks about him without actually meaning to and I mean, Dean brings home a lot of random drawings that Sam definatly knows aren’t Dean’s bc he is in no way an artist so ofc he asked who drew them and Dean’s like “Just a friend.”

So Sam has heard a lot about this friend and has a very vague suspicion that Dean has a small tiny crush on this friend but he has no idea what this friend looks like or what’s the friend’s name

He didn’t even know if it was a boy or a girl, tbh

But ye Sammy meets Cas and Cas is being super awkward and stuff and just has no idea how to interact with people

Dean shoos Sam away so they can study

But Sam is spying on them

It didn’t take too much observing to realise that they both have huge gigantic crushes on each other

I mean he knows his brother and Cas is blushing way too much

So ye he becomes the captain of the Destiel ship

All aboard crazy town

So Dean goes outside to the vending machines to get them two cokes

And literally Sam takes the first second he has and walks right up to Cas and says, “You should ask him out.”

Cas is like “what the freak” and is so confused bc this literally came out of nowhere like wtw

“Wh-why would I do that?” Cas asks.

“Bc you like him.”

“Wh-what?”

“And he likes you.”

“wHaT?!” he shocked

“Do it. Please, just make him happy for once.” (bc y’all know that sure Sammy is gonna be an annoying little brother but in the end he just wants to do whatever it takes to make his brother happy)

Cas nervously nods his head, now a lot more nervous than before

“You better not hurt him, Castiel.” (bc yes Dean is a protective big bro but Sammy is a protective little bro too)

Tbh Cas is a little scared of Sam now

Dean walks in. “They where out of coke so does root beer work for you?” Dean asks, putting the room key on the table

“Oh it’s fine” Cas is sketching now

Oops a blob became Dean

He’s drawing Dean

Oops

The picture pretty much takes Dean’s breath away

Like holy schnitzel

He falls a little deeper in love

Cas puts down his pencil, standing up and walking to Dean. They end up close. Rlly close.

“Dean I..... Can I ask you a question?” Cas says

“Of course,” Dean says

“Can I... Would you.....” Oh gods this is a lot harder than he thought

“CanIkissyou?” he says finally. It comes out in a rush and is definatly not what he wanted to come out he was just supposed to ask Dean to the movies or something

“What?” Dean says, not sure if he heard correctly

He very much hopes that he did

“Can I--” but he stops bc he realises that there lips are centimeters apart

He can feel Dean’s breath on his face

Frick

And shoot he didn’t even know what the heck he was doing just some how in some way he kinda accidentally um maybe went forward a few centimeters???? Um well ye uh now he has the problem that he’s kissing Dean Winchester

Frick

Dean is literally so surprised and has no idea if it’s real

Then, he comes out of his shock and wraps his hands around Cas’ waist, deepening the kiss

And Cas is literally screaming on the inside bc this is literally even better than his fantasies

And also ofc Dean is literally being softer than he has ever been with anybody ever

When they break away they both blushing way too much like gods help them

Sammy walks into the kitchen and sees them standing close together with both of their cheeks looking like tomatoes and is like “What the freak happened to you two”

Dean is like “Don’t you dare say anything.”

Sam giggles and leaves

“I have wanted to do that for a long time,” Dean admits, and then he kisses Cas again

Oh gods wow they literally end up being the cutest couple at school

Dean calls Cas his little angel

Cas is constantly drawing stuff for Dean and believe it or not he actually is pretty good at love letters so Dean gets sum amazing stuff from him

Their perfect date isn’t anything fancy it’s kinda just going out for cheeseburgers

But they love it

Dean and Cas are constantly “stealing” John’s car and just driving around and stuff (not that Cas likes cars, he just loves seeing it make Dean happy)

They try to keep at the back of their minds that Dean might have to leave soon

They don’t want that to happen

But sometimes, during a long weekend or a particularly bad night the thought drifts into their minds

Dean would just ask his dad if he could try getting a place of his own or stay with Cas but he doesn’t want to go anywhere without Sam

So :p

But good news!!! John actually finds a good job!!! :D

All of them are happy little dorks

And UGH JUST. SO. CUTE!!!!!!

Yup that all i got ( @destielsolangeloshipper u mind if I tag u in this??? I sorry to bother u)

#lol i might make a real fanfic but idk if i can so meh #but he here some destiel trash stuff #High School AU #destiel headcanon #spn #dean winchester #castiel #sam winchester #john winchester #my random junk #:p #candy writes spn

580 notes · View notes

wormstacheangel · 3 years ago

Text

reminder I am watching The Nanny and I can't help but write scenes as destiel. So here is my second one. I think this one is a bit more sitcom, especially towards the end :) This is for episode 1x11.

wc: 1.7k

The kids have been having a hard time with the one night they don’t have Dean to tuck them in. Whatever Cas did, the kids would correct him and tell him Dean did it this way or did it that way. He simply couldn’t get it right. Even Claire was missing Dean, showing her fear of losing the one person who finally got her to be less angry at the world.

After finally getting the kids to bed, Cas walks into the kitchen to find Balthazar lounging around in his robe with a drink in one hand and scrolling through movie reviews with the other. Cas stands over his shoulder, trying to read it, but his eyes gaze over, not caring enough but still, he sighs.

“Would you like a drink, sir?” Balthazar sounded exasperated with him already, even if he has only been in the room for less than a minute.

“Please.” Cas fetches a cup and holds it out for Balthazar to pour some whiskey into it. He has been feeling restless all night but can’t pinpoint the reason why. “You know, Mr. Winchester would have loved talking about horrible movies with you.”

“Yes. I know.”

“I wonder how he is.”

“I’m sure he is enjoying his date, sir.” Balthazar takes a sip of his drink as he keeps his eyes on the screen in front of him.

Cas walks over to stand by the kitchen island. He already undid his tie, undid his top four buttons, and he can’t imagine how his hair looked after pacing the living room for a good 20 minutes.

He swirled his drink before downing the whole thing in one gulp.

“Or he can be having a miserable time, sir. The man was a mortician, after all. I don’t think that would fit Mr. Winchester’s happy-go-lucky attitude very well.”

Cas perks up at that, feeling his chest warm-up — probably because of the drink actually— as he stands up straighter with a hopeful grin. “You think so?”

“Have I ever wronged you, sir?”

“You’re right, Balthazar! He would never like that-that depressing man.” Cas smile grows. “Cause you know, the kids, they would miss him very much if he left.”

Balthazar shuts his laptop as he rolls his eyes, “For god’s sake, sir! It’s only the first-!” He looks at Cas’s stunned expression before slowly falling back in his chair, a cheeky smile on his face. “I mean, with all due respect, sir.”

“Yes.” Cas sighs, ignoring the outburst. “I think you’re right. I’m getting ahead of myself, aren’t I?”

“Maybe a tad bit, sir.”

A chuckle came out of his mouth as Cas opens the trash can and plucks out the bag to throw it outside. He walks towards the back door as he says, “I didn’t see anything between them anyways. I’m sure it’ll be fine!”

Cas pulls the back door open only to find Dean and his date making out. Leaving Cas standing there stunned and fumbling, not knowing if he should break them apart or close the door.

“I don’t see anything between them either, sir.” Balthazar joked as they both watched Dean press closer to his date. Unaware of their audience. Balthazar was the one to finally close the door, taking the bag of trash away from Cas, as he leads him towards the stairs. “I believe it’s time for you to go to bed, Mr. Novak.”

“Yes. Yes. You’re probably right.” Cas shook his head, hoping to erase that image away like an etch a sketch, but he still saw Dean’s mouth being sucked on. “Goodnight.”

“Night, sir.”

(More Under The Cut)

In the morning, Cas somehow convinced himself—Balthazar was only half-listening to his words anyways— to talk to Dean about the rules of the house. It had to be done. He didn’t want Dean to bring home strange people to his home, where his children lived. He didn’t want to see—or better yet— he didn’t want his kids to see Dean bring people into his room.

What kind of example will that present to them? Not a very good one.

He knocks at the door and quickly gets an answer to come in; Dean never hesitates to have any of the kids in his room. Cas would usually find them all curled up in Dean’s bed watching cartoons on a Sunday morning.

“Good morning, Mr. Winchester.” Cas poked his head into the room first, and that enough stopped him short. Dean looked like he was getting ready to go out.

Dean is dressed in a comfortable-looking robe, no shirt, and he’s assuming no pants by the fact that he can see a peek of his thighs from the slit in the front.

“Morning, Mr. Novak. What can I do for you?” Dean turned back to the mirror, a small smile stretched across his lips as he continued to fix his hair.

“I just wanted to talk about your um—You know we have rules in this house, and I just wanted to make sure you know them.”

“Oh, I think you have me confused with Claire. She’s two doors down.” Dean teased.

“No. No, this is about your date. About you having dates. And-And having…dates.” Cas sighed the last word, unable to get the word he wants out without his whole body warming up. “Anyways,” He cleared his throat. “The rules of the house with me-”

“Oh, with you? Gosh, maybe I should have read the fine print better.” Dean teased, winking at him through his reflection as he ran his hands through his growing hair.

“No. Not like that!”

“Let me get this straight.” Dean turns to face Cas before practically strutting over to Cas, half-dressed in a semi-open robe. Cas eyes struggle not to travel on the man before him. “We are talking about having sex in my room.”

“Well, not-not us. Not we.” Cas nervous gestures between them, noticing his hand hit Dean’s bare chest in the process because they were standing so damn close.

“We already covered that.” Dean winks at him again, making Cas’s heart race. “Don’t worry, Mr. Novak, I won’t do anything to show a bad example for the children.”

“Good.” Cas stuffs his hands in his pockets as he rocks on his heels. “Yes. Good. Okay!”

“Okay.” Dean turns back to the mirror.

“Where are you going anyways?” That sounded way too demanding. “If I may ask?”

“Well, if you must know. I got another date. We’re meeting for lunch.”

“Again?”

“Yeah. Well, I gotta eat.”

“Of course. Well, have fun, Mr. Winchester.”

“Thank you, Mr. Novak. Nice chat.”

Cas makes his way out of the room, bumping on furniture as he went.

Cas walks into the kitchen that same afternoon to find Dean sitting on the kitchen counter, shoveling ice cream into his mouth. Cas quickly rushes over to take the spoon away from him.

“Mr. Winchester! You are lactose intolerant!”

“Well, I deserve a little bit of ice cream after the crap day I had, and the coconut milk one you got me is still frozen solid!”

“Oh,” Cas puts the ice cream away before walking back to him. “Date didn’t go so well this time? Was it the whole creepy mortician life?”

“No,” Dean sighs, watching as Cas runs the Dean-friendly fudge brownie ice cream under some hot water. “Weirdly enough, I was getting used to the idea.”

“Then, what was wrong with him?” Cas hands Dean a spoon, and they both dig into the still hard ice cream, but they can still scape a few bits off. Cas tried not to follow the way Dean’s tongue pokes out and licks at the spoon.

“He was a clown.” Dean sighs, spinning the spoon in his hand before aggressively digging at the pint of ice cream.

“In what way?”

“In a clown way.”

“What-?”

“Red nose! Big shoes! You want me to google it for you?” Cas looks stunned by the outburst. But it clicks; he means an actual fucken clown. He tried not to laugh as Dean let out a defeated sigh. “Sorry. I just thought…I just thought I finally found someone. You know? I’m 30. I should have found someone already.”

“I’m sorry, Dean. But I’m sure you will. You’ll find someone special who won’t honk their nose at you.” Cas bops Dean’s nose, it’s awkward, but Dean still chuckles when he pushes Cas’s hand away.

The atmosphere around them was warm and comforting, something he wishes to drown in. But in a respectable boss-and-employee-who-lives-with-him kind of way. The smile they share fades a little as they look away, and then Dean jumps off the counter with a yawn.

“I’m gonna head to bed now. Goodnight, Mr. Novak.”

“Goodnight, Mr. Winchester.”

And just like that, they are back to professionals.

The following day, Dean is in the room talking to Sam about his dating life.

“You just think the perfect person is gonna knock at your door yelling out ‘there you are! I found you!’”

“Oh, there you are.” Cas walks in, neither Sam nor Dean notices the coincidence, holding out two different ties. “What tie should I wear? Blue or yellow?”

“Blue. Goes great with your eyes.” Dean turns around to tie the tie nicely around Cas’s neck. Sam gave them no attention as it was an action that happens regularly.

When he was done, he fixes Cas’s collar and pats his shoulder before telling him he looks good.

“Thank you, Mr. Winchester.”

Cas walks out of the room while Dean continues to get ready as he talks. “I just want a person who actually respects and values my opinions, not just my pretty face.”

“Ah, sorry to bother you again, Mr. Winchester,” Cas walks back in. “but I do value your opinion. Should I wear the gold cufflinks or the silver?”

“Gold is a classic. But make sure it’s those nice ones Claire picked out for you. She’ll love to see them.”

“Oh, yes. Thank you! That would be great.” Cas walks out of the room with a grateful smile.

Sam is still flipping through Dean’s magazine collection as he sighs, “Yeah, Dean, that’s never going to happen. You should have just dated the damn clown,”

“And what? Never see you again cause you’ll be scared my boyfriend is in full makeup? No, thank you. Now let’s go before we’re late to the damn game.”

#nannynatural #thenannynatural #i am insane for doing this but here i am #i hope you didnt think it was gonna be all angsty lol #the nanny is a famous slow burn sooooo #destiel #deancas #destiel au #fic #destiel fic #my writing #wormstachewrites #slow burn #once upon a queue

174 notes · View notes

erosia-rhodes · 3 years ago

Text

Top 9 Newbie thoughts on Supernatural after Six Months of Madness

I started watching Supernatural a week before the series finale, and full disclosure, it was only because I heard about the gay angel. I loved me some Good Omens, so I decided to check out a series my only previous thoughts about had been, "Is that show still on?" In the past six months, I've watched about fifty percent of the episodes scattered across all fifteen seasons. I've also spent time following the bonkers-in-the-best-way fandom on Tumblr, and here is what I have learned:

1) Everyone who loves Supernatural also hates Supernatural

No one is capable of praising this show without also trashing it. Supernatural is as awful as it is awesome. Watching Supernatural is like hate-fucking your nemesis against a wall; you're totally conflicted about it, but it's enormously pleasurable and you know you're going to do it over and over again. No one has a pure, untainted love for this show. They only have complicated emotions. This is because…

2) The fact that the show needs to be fixed is an essential part of its appeal

Strangely, if this show were better, it wouldn't be as popular. If you love a show that is perfect, you watch it once or twice or thrice, make a bunch of memes, and move on with your life two years later when you find something else to hyper-fixate on. If you love a show that's broken, you spend the rest of your life obsessed with fixing it. It's the crooked photo hanging on the wall that yearns to be straightened (because, you know, this show is bad at making things straight). It's the stray dog you know would be adoptable if you fattened it up and socialized it with your other dogs, and just like some people can't stop rescuing animals, Supernatural fans can't stop thinking about how to fix a show that isn't great, but could be with a flea bath and a trip to the groomers. Supernatural fans are not fans of the actual show, but of the show they imagine it could be, one that only exists in an alternate universe. They are in love with the Platonic ideal of Supernatural. That's also the reason why…

3) The fans understand the characters and themes better than 95% of the people who worked on the show

The people who watch Supernatural have thought about it way, way, way, more than anyone who produced it. I have read complex essays about what the color of people's clothing imply and how the state of the Impala reflects the state of Dean's mental health and other things I'm certain this show did not do intentionally. People can find depth in the shallowest aspects of this series. Any random fan could explain the complicated dynamics of the Winchester family and the overriding themes of the series better than most of the people who worked on it. That includes the LGBTQ stuff, which leads to the fact that…

4) The show is simultaneously too gay and not gay enough

On one end of the spectrum are fans who are offended you would dare to suggest one of the Winchesters might like kissing a boy and they'll shove you in a locker and duct tape your butt cheeks together for it. On the other end of the spectrum are fans who think it's odd that every episode doesn't end with two attractive men dry humping in a dark corner of the bunker library. No one is happy with the level of gayness on this show. It's always got too much "No Homo" or too much queer subtext, which is why I've concluded that…

5) The audience this show wanted is not the audience they got and they are resentful of it

The original pitch for this show targeted a male demographic who’s into toxic masculinity in a non-ironic way. It was about bros and beers and muscle cars and shotguns and hot chicks who will be killed to further the man's storyline. However, when making that show, they accidentally created a show that attracted female viewers who liked speculating about the queer subtext of each scene while looking at pretty men with traumatic backstories fight back their man tears. The show depends on the unintended audience segment to survive, but is bitter about it, which they remind you of time and time again by killing the female and non-white characters and toying with endless queer-baiting. It's like the writers got a plane to Rome, ended up in a gay nightclub in Amsterdam instead, and even though the canals and tulips make it a lovely city to visit, they wanted to go to Rome, damnit, and they'll never let you forget it! I also suspect that…

6) The people who made this show were at constant war with each other

This show has such a split personality. Sometimes it leans into the gay stuff and other times it makes fun of it outright. Sometimes they'll introduce an interesting side character that could make the show more diverse and then they'll slaughter that person for practically no reason. Sometimes they praise free will and other times they force people down pre-destined paths. The writers feel like a dysfunctional family stuck at Thanksgiving dinner endlessly squabbling with each other—who then had to write a TV show together over dessert. That's why it's such a weird hot mess. The show's unevenness makes me think that…

7) Some people's attachment to the show can only be explained by the fact that it imprinted on them when they were young

Some fans have mentioned they started watching Supernatural when they were kids. It's a pretty common experience to go back and watch things you loved when you were a kid and realize they were…not so good. Your memories of them are far better than the reality of them, but you cling to them anyway. The shows you watch when you're young imprint on you in a way you never forget. Supernatural fans are like a baby duck who looks up at a cat and assumes it’s their mother. Then that cat slices open their poor little hearts, leaving them wounded but not dead, forever be toyed with in agony. The only relief is that…

8) The fandom is batshit insane in the best way

I started following the Supernatural fandom on Tumblr in November of 2020 and OMG, it was AH-MAZE-ING. It was total insanity. I didn't understand half of what was going on, but it was more fun than a yard full of puppies doing zoomies. People were posting detailed PowerPoint presentations theorizing how the series would end, citing extensive physical evidence like the background in Misha's hotel room. People learned election results through Supernatural memes. Destiel went canon every other week. When the Spanish dub was released, Tumblr literally crashed! Obama's Twitter was following a Destiel account. There was a Twitter wedding for Destiel on Valentine's Day, which made the one-month anniversary on Pi Day.

It's been a ride, y'all. I have no idea how you guys survived fifteen years of this. The fandom has been so much fun that I actually sat down and watched more than 100 hours of this show so I could understand everything better. It's like the show is an extension of the fandom instead of vice versa. If anything sums up Supernatural for me, that's it. It's all about the fandom and the show is secondary to that. It's like the fans willed the show into existence as part of some partially botched spell. And part of that twisted spell is that…

9) The show will never die until someone finds its bones and burns them

This show has been off the air for more than six months now and it keeps trending on Tumblr consistently. Misha recently trended on Twitter simply because he was at the Oscars. That was it! He didn't even do anything there, he just attended, and some people figured it out by the reflection in a photo posted by someone else! And just as I was proofreading this post, Destiel started trending again because John Cena is a stan or something? This fandom is crazy and unpredictable and I love it like Dean loves pie! If there ever does come a time when this show stops trending, that will be the moment when they decide to reboot it or revisit it.

There is a lot more I could say about this show, but these were the elements that seemed most unique and bizarre about it. I wouldn't say Supernatural is a ride-or-die fandom for me, and I have no intention of watching another 100 hours of this series, but it's been hella' fun to drop in for a while. The show is just as much a dysfunctional mess as the Winchester family and I guess that's why people love it, right?

#supernatural #spn #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #jensen ackles #jared padalecki #misha collins #destiel #the cw #tv #television

145 notes · View notes

americachavez · 4 years ago

Note

did cas really tell dean to kneel before their new god? did that actually happen? i thought him beating the shit out of dean in that alley was the most unrestrainedly horny thing this show had ever done ACTUALLY you know what scratch that new question: top horny moments from the cw's supernatural (2005 - 2020)

getting this ask feels like my sins of the last week have been weighed against the Trials I Have Gone Through since the premier of supernatural on the wb in september of 2005 and I’m not sure if it is a punishment or reward

some notes before we begin:

the ep with dean’s male siren was like, conceptually horny but not actually that horny because the dude was uglie. I’m sorry to this man

all you sam girls out there. I respect you but I do not respect jared padalecki who is JUST tall and has zero sex appeal. but those eps where he’s like, drinking ruby’s blood and then eating her pussy are. you know. I’ll give you that

I am ONLY UP TO SEASON 10 so fair warning this is not comprehensive but the horniness does seem to drop off sharply after the mark of cain is no longer in play lol gotta love a good demon murder tattoo plot

this is easily the most insane thing I’ve ever done, including the destiel manifesto

S1 EP12: the scene where dean gets healed by the faith healer, on his knees with a hand in his hair and looking somewhere between religious ecstasy, brain death and an orgasm. starting this list off great

S1 EP22: azazel possessing john winchester. no I will not explain further if u know u know <3

S3 EP10: dean being taunted by a dream version of himself, this is where we first got the daddy’s blunt little instrument line. still burned in my hippocampus a good 13 years later thank yew

S4 EP1: dean crawling out of his own grave covered in grave dirt. hot. the HANDPRINT. HOT. also tangent but this reveal after the s3 finale was WILD back in 2008 I hollered in my dorm room after canvassing for obama. simpler times man

S4 EP 1: cas’ intro scene. the barn. the shadow wings. the hair??? getting stabbed in the chest by the man you just pulled out of hell. getting aaaallll up in that personal space. his little eyebrow. “you don’t think you deserve to be saved.” OUTRAGEOUSLY FLAMING

S4 EP02: “I dragged you out of hell I can throw you back in.” <<< this angel tops. mark dean down as scared and horny etc

S4 EP16: this ENTIRE EPISODE but specifically the part where dean tortures alastair as some kind of foreplay and then alastair kicks his ass. carved you into a new animal. jesus.

S4 EP16: wait I forgot about the part where cas also gets his ass kicked and looks all....hm. dazed and covered in blood while he’s on his knees and about to die. yeah.

S5 EP4: I mean this entire ep is unfairly horny considering everyone is dying of a zombie plague and hasn’t showered in like, 4 years but if I had to pick one hmmm. the dean/dean interrogation scene with the panty kink yeah I know it’s not original but hm. it happened. also misha collins just being able to convey that CAS IS A FLEXIBLE SLUT with a single roll of his shoulders. who SAYS this man can’t act!!!!!

S5 EP18: the ALLEY SCENE. DEAN DOESN’T FIGHT BACK. CAS HOLDS HIM UP OFF THE GROUND AND THEN THROWS HIM ACROSS THE ALLEY. WHY DID EVERYONE THINK CAS COULDN’T TOP. you all had brainworms.

S5 EP18: when cas locks dean in the panic room to stop him from saying yes to michael and “well cas not for nothing but the last person who looked at me like that I got laid” I hate this show. wait I think the blow me cas line is in this episode too what the fuck were they on here

S6 EP5: the scene where dean gets turned into a vampire. between the old dude who I think calls dean a pretty boy (??) and soulless sam....watching??? no ******* but there were just some absolutely foul energies in that scene and I still do not understand WHAT they were thinking

S6 EP20: cas doing a double smite on two demons by slamming them to the ground and then shoving another demon back in its vessel and then smiting him in the same motion. TOP. ENERGY.

S6 EP22: season 6 is possibly cas’ horniest season because he’s like, going through angel puberty after getting his first boner for dean, but the final cas eps are. whoof. cas eats a bunch of souls and proclaims himself to be a new god in order to handle said boner, and then the season ends with cas telling them to bow down and profess their love to him, their new lord, or he will destroy them. note: the way this is framed makes it look like cas is only staring at dean while he says this, even though sam and bobby are also there. the season ends with dramatic zooms on both cas and dean’s faces respectively. this made me actively regret ditching this show after s5 lol

S8 EP??: literally EVERY SINGLE PURGATORY FLASHBACK. cas dean and benny are all purgatory hot in the “pop 10 cranberry pills and risk the UTI” kind of way but also. dean being the hot girl bottom between two tops who hate each other. I really. whew. I need to go take a shower.

S8 EP17: if I get canceled for including the crypt scene on this list I blame you bud. but dean on his knees begging a brainwashed cas to stop killing him WAS sexy. how many times has dean been on his knees in this list wait there’s another one coming up next jsldjfsldkjf

S9 EP2: abaddon getting dean on his knees (YEAH) and pulling his hair and praising him for always coming when called HELLO???? the only thing that ruins this is dean says “I can’t tell if we’re gonna fight or make out” because this is the CW and they won’t let him say fuck

S9 EP6: ah. this entire episode is Emotionally Horny but the horny horny part is when they’re in the car and dean is telling cas to unbutton his shirt and. watches. I know this was on my destiel manifesto but I need it here too

S9 EP9: cas, covered in blood, slitting another angel’s throat and eating his grace after getting tortured. that shot alone made me understand why this website was so goddamn horny for misha collins for nearly a damn decade

S9 EP11: MARK OF CAIN BABEY. cain watching dean beat up a bunch of demons as an audition for taking on the mark, while crowley also is a fucking voyeur to the whole thing. cain is also a hot silver fox with daddy energies. I said what I said

S9 EP 16: dean getting the first blade. he’s chained to a pillar and being menaced by a foppish dandy who wants to add him to his “collection” (WOW). dean then kills him with the blade and whew. murder is sexy sometimes

S9 EP21: dean being pinned against a wall by abaddon’s power, then using the mark of cain to break her hold, calling the first blade to him psychically and then killing her. god the mark of cain is hot

S9 EP23: dean waking up with the demon eyes NUT

S10 EP2: demon dean beating up that dude with the boring backstory and kicking his ass. really was a go on baby I got your flower moment because I hated that dude and I love demon dean

S10 EP3: demon dean being chained up and taunting sam about how his brother is gone, then hunting sam through the bunker. demon dean in general was VERY fun for me, someone who loves trash

S10 EP9: dean going berserk and killing a bunch of pedophile rapists/child abusers. I’m sorry I know this show is trying to preach morality at me about monsters and unnecessary murder and humanity or whatever but we blew past that like 8 SEASONS AGO. also the mark of cain is sexy

S10 EP14: the rest of this list is really gonna be mark of cain stuff isn’t it look I’m here to have fun. cain and dean’s fight. cain continuously tossing his mane of hair back and taunting dean with the picture of what he’s going to become, who he’s going to kill. dean begging cain to tell him that he can stop, and then ultimately killing him. rip daddy.

S11 EP4: again I have not watched this however. every shot of this episode is PRESTIGE TELEVISION because driving a muscle car is sexy. and especially the shot of dean all beat to hell and begging his car to start and giving her a little kiss from his fingers to her dash. ugh. masculinity.

S12 EP10: the bearded salt-and-pepper daddy look returns, only it’s an angel this time and he’s wearing a vest and shirtsleeves and he swordfights with a hot redheaded lady in a suit and an eyepatch. this show is good sometimes!!! and oh fuck lol I just realized this is the same guy who played krissy’s hot hunter dad in s7 probably the first guy who’s hotter as an angel than a hunter. huh.

S12 EP 11: dean riding larry the mechanical bull to “broomstick cowboy.” I have no idea where this factors into the ep but I have seen. the youtube clip

S13 EP23: from what I can tell s13 is way more emotionally horny than boner horny, although dean burning cas’ body was sexy. but the horniest part was dean saying yes to michael and then michael taking over and saying “thanks for the suit.” we are going to ignore the silliest fight scene in existence as well as the final shot ending on a FREEZE FRAME like a goddamn tiktok

S14: not gonna pick a specific moment because I have not watched yet!!! but michael dean is hot. idk why michael is weirdly hot and I cannot stand any iteration of lucifer on this television programme. it should be the reverse but I’m forever an older sibling stan apparently. someone who is catholic could probably explain this better.

S15 EP13: genevieve padalecki and danneel ackles fight flirting as ruby and anael I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY HELD OUT ON THIS TILL THE LAST SEASON

I know I am missing things but this is already an absolutely incomprehensible screed. I know I’m missing shit from the latter seasons but give me time I’m pacing myself

#reply tag #spn tag #literally no one read this lol this is insane #Anonymous

304 notes · View notes

mrsbravosixx · 3 years ago

Note

Im just very confused. Ya’ll keep mentioning hellers being so toxic and hating on Jared but I hardly see any one of them posting anything negative in regards to Jared. I even went to the anti Jared tag just to see if there are any hellers making these attacks to him and would personally send them a long message and tell them off, but All I saw was a bunch of J2 and wincest blogs that support Jared talking about how much hate he gets. That he gets “death threats” but they never show any proof of all these hate posts. It’s just surface talk with no source or proof. To my great astonishment these so called Jared fans actually down right hate on his wife. If one is a true fan of someone, they’ll respect their family members. Ofc you don’t have to automatically be a fan of your fav celebrity’s spouse, but have some respect. How would you feel if a bunch of strangers who claimed to love you, post stuff about your marriage being a sham. What has G&D even done to y’all that you constantly spew so much negativity about them everyday? You say you don’t give a shit about the wives, yet you spend so much time to actually go out of you way and make up stories that’ll make these amazing women look bad. I mean it’s normal to be jealous but to this extent? It’s ridiculous. Like seriously!? Yes, ship him with Jensen all you want, it’s fantasy. I get it. But don’t stoop so low to the point where you hate on their lovely wives who they love so very much. Simply put, it’s being jealous to the point that you make up all these trash about them having beards, being in a loveless marriage etc. I also see some asshats actually talk crap about the wives on Jensen and Jared’s social media posts... it’s like a form of bullying. What are y’all getting at here? I simply don’t understand. Are y’all deliberately trying to make hellers look bad? So that your toxic hate and obsession is justified? I have a bunch of destiel friends who sincerely and absolutely love and adore Jared. Heck! They don’t even have any problems with wincest. Let people ship what they want to ship but know your limits. And have some respect for these actors family.

Honestly not sure what you’re on about, anon.

I haven’t posted any wife hate, I haven’t seen any wife hate in the reblogs either.

And no one has even mentioned hellers? Especially in relation to J2 having beards. The two are in no way connected.

#why am I receiving this type of message #👀#anon

15 notes · View notes

catsmam7 · 3 years ago

Note

Haha, you almost caught me. Well, I now see, that you wrote them on all possible blogs and did not even read, what actually blog publish. But it's all blogs that criticize Musha and write the truth about hellers and destiel fans.

And Gen and Dee? - but I really didn't get it - I don't care and you won't find "toxic hatred" with me. I just ignore them.

That's why I know you don't know what I have on my blog. You just have in your head - she also dares to criticize our lord, our god, our Musha ... And that's what you're after.

The other remarks are explicitly the nonsense of the heller. Exists so much hatred, hated announcements about Jared - even on his tweets, in his name. No one is trying to make hellers look bad. They're bad. Trust me, I'd love for hellers to get in the holes and I've never read about them and their hatred again.

10 notes · View notes

mariatsukiko · 4 years ago

Text

OKAY sooo my best friend of 8+yrs said he was debating on watching Supernatural bc Dean is hot & he likes Destiel. He knows I was/am obsessed with this show. I, being obsessed with the trash show, was like omg honey are you sure about that?!? 😅

He said, "I just saw how he had mad gay/bi energy & I'm here for it." My heart broke for him 😢 lol so I tell him, as a warning, that damn near everything is ""accidental"" subtext. Also that Cas doesnt show up til season4, it's 15seasons, & happy binging.

He then asks (because I said ""accidental"" subtext), "So you're saying Destiel isn't really a thing? Or just hinted & teased but nothing ever really happens?" And I'm like OH stuff happens, some things you won't have to read into it'll just be there lol but like the network didn't want it to be a thing but it became a big... big thing. I said there's controversy & that I'll tell him EVERYTHING when he's finished so I won't spoil it.

HE TOLD ME TO SPOIL IT!!!!!

I relived everything & typed up 3 super condensed long texts titled Backstory, Controversy, & Reasoning. I also sent him the Destiel being bfs for 20mins video. He got off work 30mins ago so I wonder when he'll respond 🤣

#supernatural #destiel #spn #mariatsukiko #Mari text

13 notes · View notes

dontshootmespence · 4 years ago

Text

Which Fic

I was tagged by @stusbunker and @there-must-be-a-lock!

I’ll do a mix of CM and SPN fics.

Which of your fics…

…did you think would get a bigger reaction/audience than it got?

For SPN, I think Never Saw Blue Like That Before. It’s Destiel, which is obviously a big SPN ship and I was really happy with how it came out.

For Criminal Minds, basically any series I’ve done that isn’t smut. But the three I’m happiest with are Upheaval, a season 13 ender fix it fic.

After a rollercoaster year filled with departing friends, jail time, and one of the most notorious killers the team has ever faced, the last thing anyone needs is this. A truck barrels toward a group of them, leaving their future uncertain, while others stand by unable to help in any way. What crosses their minds when their lives flash before their eyes? Even if the physical injuries don’t kill them, will they be able to recover?

Coercion - Started from a one line challenge.

You are just about to start your new job at the BAU after years of working to get there, when a man you don’t know approaches you with an evil plan and knowledge of every sordid detail of your past. What will you do? Will you give into the man’s demands? Or will you be able to find another way out?

And Caged

Years after Spencer’s wife is kidnapped, there’s a break in her case and she comes home. Or does she? Is she the same woman she was before her ordeal?

…got a better reaction than you expected?

For SPN, it’s probably The Perfect Storm, an Alpha!Sam x Omega!Reader. It has about 260 notes but it was my first ABO fic and I was so fucking nervous about posting it, so I was surprised at the success it had.

For CM, honestly there are a bunch of smuts that I’m like...okay I wrote that and they BLEW UP. Most recently was Phone Calls Be Damned. I wrote it in like 20 minutes...it has nearly 900 notes. I work for ages on some pieces that BARELY get a tenth of that.

…is your funniest?

For CM, a lot of my general CM fics involving the whole team tend to be on the funnier side. I love Prank War, Secrets of the Bullpen, Pics Or It Didn’t Happen and In The Middle of the Night.

For SPN, I don’t have a ton of funny. But I think You Win or You Die is pretty funny.

…is your darkest or angstiest?

For CM, I’d have to go with Candyfloss and Novocaine, which was a collab with the lovely @cherrybombs-and-rabbitholes.

For SPN, I’m working on what I think will be my angstiest to date, but the current one is Salvation, a Sam x Reader. I don’t really do angst super well. IMO, it’s my worst genre.

…is your absolute favorite?

For CM, it is impossible to pick. After 6 years writing CM, I have 1,000+ fics to choose from. Anything I’ve written as a request to “help” someone or make them feel better about themselves is important to me though.

For CM, it’s a Cas x Reader fic called Beauty In Stillness.

…is your least favorite?

Again, it’s hard to choose with Criminal Minds because I have so many, But I have a couple crossovers that I wrote early on in my writing that I don’t think are that good.

For SPN, it’s probably Searching for Oblivion. It was a Dean smut and one of my first forays into SPN writing. I don’t think it’s awful, but I can do better.

…was the easiest to write?

For Criminal Minds, the easiest to write was probably Passive Aggressive Partnership. I remember that one flowing pretty quickly.

For Supernatural, it has to be Cherry Red.

…was hardest to write?

For Criminal Minds, the hardest thing to write was Article of Faith.

For SPN, the hardest was Teetering on the Edge, another ABO, but I’m SO FUCKING HAPPY with how it came out.

…has your favorite lines/exchange/paragraph? (share it!)

For Criminal Minds, I am proud of a lot, but out of all the stuff I’ve written, a section from chapter 5 of Coercion stands out.

With the floodgates open, you couldn’t stop yourself from screaming. You stood up and got right up into Spencer’s face just as he’d done to you. Hotch had gotten up from his seat, thinking you were going to attempt to hurt Spencer, but you couldn’t Of course they couldn’t believe that under the circumstances. “I’ve been beaten! I’ve had my bones broken by the men that paid for me. I’ve been raped. I’ve had knives used against my skin because the rush of torturing and raping a 15-year-old girl got my clients off. I’ve been left on the side of the road with my thighs and vagina in too much pain to walk! I’ve been used as a drug mule! My only friend on the streets was murdered in front of me because I asked for a break and she had offered to take my client to let me rest. After all that, I tried to kill myself!” Your throat was raw, but you couldn’t stop. “But I had nothing. I had no money. So the only way I could think of doing it was to swallow the half a bottle of sleeping pills I had found in the trash. The next morning, I woke up in a pool of my own vomit. I took it was a sign that I was meant to do something with my life, so I pushed myself up. I walked away from the town I grew up in. Hid in sewers and pipes and abandoned buildings to make sure my pimp wouldn’t find me and kill me, or worse, rape me too, because he liked to do that if I haven’t mentioned it already, and send me back to my old life. I clawed my way up. I begged and cried and bled to get where I am now, and then that bastard came up to me and threatened to take it all away or he’d expose my past and kill you.

For SPN, there’s a section of Teetering on the Edge that JUST...I did it, man.

“Don’t you fucking dare pull that neanderthal bullshit with me, Alpha!” You yelled your throat hoarse. Sam dipped out of the area and back toward his bedroom. It didn’t matter. Whether he was here or not, you’d be seething. “You don’t get to decide my life for me! Have you ever thought that maybe I’d rather be in danger with you than safe without you?” He readied himself to respond but you pushed against his shoulder with a force that startled even you. “Did you ever stop to think that I’ve waited my entire life to find the person I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with? And that now that I found him, I’ll be damned if I let him go?”

You were on a roll. Dean wanted to speak, but you wouldn’t let him. “No! You didn’t fucking think about what I want! Because your number one priority is to make sure you don’t have anymore blood on your hands. Well, guess what. You don’t get to do that. Not with me! When you care, you get blood on your hands. That’s just the way it is. I get to make my own damn decisions!” It all just exploded out of you. You kept screaming and crying and drinking to the point where you weren’t even sure what you were saying anymore. As you kept going, your arguments shifted from his demeanor to your own health. “You claimed me,” you said, pulling your sleeve aside to shove the mark in his face. “You know what’ll happen to me without you? I could fucking die!”

Dean waited for you to stop ranting, steadily finishing his beer. Once you were all yelled out, he chose his words wisely. “There’s medication. You’ll be fine. You’re not going to change my mind,” he said flatly, trying to keep any sense of emotion out of his voice, even though you could tell he was right on the edge of acknowledging every amazing and shit feeling he was feeling in this moment. “I need you to get out of the bunker as soon as possible. For your own good.”

Without thinking, you reeled back and slapped him, open palm to cheek, relishing in the sound of the crack that reverberated throughout the bunker. “Fuck you, Alpha! Fuck. You.”

…have you reread the most?

For CM, I tend to only re-read things rarely when other people reblog. I’ll read something that they liked from a while ago and go, hell fucking yea. I wrote that.

For SPN, I re-read a lot of my Cas stuff because he’s my fucking angel :D

…would you recommend to someone reading your work for the first time?

For Criminal Minds, read all the general fic. I think it gives a taste of how I write the entire team. Though given how much I write Spencer I think I have his characterization down most.

For SPN, I think I’d go with Beauty In Stillness for fluff, Salvation for angst and Satisfaction Comes From Sharing With Others for smutttt.

…are you most proud of?

For CM, overall, I think I’d go with Upheaval.

For SPN, it’s definitely, Beauty in Stillness, Salvation and Teetering on the Edge.

Okay, this was BALLS hard, but I enjoyed :D

I’m tagging @heycasbutt @impala-dreamer @because-imma-lady-assface @covered-byroses and @illegalcerebral

#which fic

20 notes · View notes

brainrotmeta · 3 years ago

Note

You are so so annoying. I don’t care if you ship wincest or if you think it’s validated by the text or if you think it’s a fun way to view the show! good for you! I don’t expect you to stop shipping wincest but you coming onto active deancas fans posts that you WERE NOT TAGGED IN is so weird and honestly a violation of boundaries! You aren’t even sending asks so it’s just you and their audience you’re showing these people who didn’t even mention you and putting them in front of your audience of wincest fans?????

Actually while I’m being a hashtag hater let me just say the way you Own The Hellers by being like Cas and Dean are not gay. Cas isn’t even gay. If anyone is gay it’s Dean and Sam. Ummmm but Dean is straight it’s just allegorical wincest to showcase a messed up relationship in a horror show. But I will still use this as combative evidence to trash anyone who likes Dean and Cas’ relationship ☺️

Like. I don’t care if you ship wincest. But you are interacting with people who didn’t even ask with your frankly dumbfuck meta. If you think Sam and Dean are in an emotionally incestuous relationship, that’s fine. I even agree with you! Very much, actually, and I agree that is good for horror aspects because it’s uncomfortable and requires a restructuring of the relationship as the show goes on that I find very interesting and compelling!

What I don’t get is why you use this in your responses to Destiel fans when you’re owning them with your Reading Comprehension 101. Because it’s one thing for you to like, be vagueing or whatever. Or doing this fucking debunking on your own with other wincesties who agree with your analysis, like clowning on the hellers. You are trying to start a dialogue with people not working from your same incest shipping framework and it makes me like. Lmao. you look dumb!

I was actually in a semi emotionally incestuous relationship with my sibling who I had to somewhat parent. Go to family counseling with them and everything about it. (we are normal now and I care about them very much). It’s not incest like sexual attraction or even being committed to each other platonically in a way that sublimates attraction or desire! Sam and Dean in early seasons are for sure for sure emotionally incestuous in many aspects (not all I don’t think though) In later seasons they slip back into it when shit is hitting the fan and the regression is great for horror, because it’s uncomfortable, like you said. You aren’t wrong about that in any way.

But it’s so fucking STUPID to think this works counter to Destiel. To be clear I am a big fan of Deancas. I think it’s validated by the text. I don’t care to go into it right now with you, because I’m just astounded that graduate from supernatural studies and the decider of what is Correct and Textual over here has such shitty shallow takes and delivery about the textual incest, which you’d think a wincest shipper would be good at! But no you’re awful. it’s not even interesting. Watching the brothers get better a little and then just nosedive back into insane emotional incest when things go wrong and it never getting better until the relationship is just super bad is… I can see why that would be compelling for some. it’s horror. it’s a valid way to recontextualize the show and I am not even mad about it! But it’s not what happens in canon

Their emotional incest as the show goes on gets better, not worse. Deancas in this context compels me a lot, and it’s part of the reason I like it so much but I won’t go into that unless you’re curious or want to yell at me about how stupid it is and ask. But it compels me because I want Dean and Sam to get better in the incest aspect, and I want their relationship to improve. Dean is abusive largely in other ways by the end of the show and I enjoy it because it’s fucked up and interesting. I’ll even throw you the bone that the finale takes a super sharp twist back into emotional incest and it’s insane and compels me! It has a very unreality feel to it and I enjoy it.

I went on so long here but TLDR I think you sound really REALLY stupid talking about Dean and Sams emotional incest as some kind of own to the hellers. they can coexist and in my opinion make each other even more interesting to engage with (textually!! even just friendship. it’d still fascinate me if they were platonic). If you want to be mr Shapiro of supernatural tumblr I’m begging you to at least make even an ounce of sense because your ‘meta’ isn’t interesting in the least. it’s fucking boring and frankly insulting! As someone who has dealt with emotional incest (this isn’t important like I’m also uncomfortable with your literal incest shipping but it isn’t about me and I don’t expect you to like. Stop posting about it just because I say I’m uncomfortable)

You are so so annoying.

fair

you coming onto active deancas fans posts that you WERE NOT TAGGED IN is so weird and honestly a violation of boundaries!

If you post something in public, especially something tagged meta, you're inviting people to respond to it. It's not a violation of boundaries, it's just shitty web design. People can and have blocked me. Which is good. Less destiel nonsense to run into when I'm trying to enjoy spiderman gifs or something.

You aren’t even sending asks so it’s just you and their audience you’re showing these people who didn’t even mention you and putting them in front of your audience of wincest fans?????

I actually think most of my followers are DeanCas shippers rubbernecking.

Anyway I'm cutting this for length

Cas isn’t even gay. I've actually stated that I think that while Castiel's confession was plausibly deniable, I think a romantic reading was the one with the most merit. Can you at least drag me for stuff I said? Unless you're going mad as hell that I pointed out angelic gender doesn't map onto human gender?

If anyone is gay it’s Dean and Sam. I haven't stated my opinion on Sam's sexuality.

But I will still use this as combative evidence to trash anyone who likes Dean and Cas’ relationship. I don't care if you like Dean and Cas' relationship. I'm annoyed by massive misreading, in particular trying to fit Cas into Sam's narrative role.

But you are interacting with people who didn’t even ask with your frankly dumbfuck meta. No one has the right to universal praise when they post meta.

What I don’t get is why you use this in your responses to Destiel fans when you’re owning them with your Reading Comprehension 101. I don't, as a general rule. I often have to bring in Sam because of Destiel meta's annoying habit of trying to replace Sam and Cas' roles.

Because it’s one thing for you to like, be vagueing or whatever. Or doing this fucking debunking on your own with other wincesties who agree with your analysis, like clowning on the hellers. I'm disagreeing with people's meta posts.

You are trying to start a dialogue with people not working from your same incest shipping framework and it makes me like. Lmao. you look dumb! I usually don't even bring up the wincest lens. It's only important to episodes like Sex and Violence. But most of my asks are people angry I'm acknowledging the intended subtext written/directed/acted in the show.

Their emotional incest as the show goes on gets better, not worse. ...no it doesn't. Season ten ends with Dean mock executing Sam and Sam releasing the darkness to save Dean. What happens it that Sam becomes more passive and less likely to resist Dean's controlling nature. Jack becomes the big sticking point because Sam might not be willing or able fight for himself (as much) anymore, but he tries to fight for Jack.

I mean, yeah, there are highs and lows in season 12-15, and it never gets as bad as season 9. But I think Sam and Dean in season 1-2 are waaaaay healthier than Sam and Dean in season 14, where Dean pressures Sam to tick Jack into a box to live out eternity.

Deancas in this context compels me a lot, and it’s part of the reason I like it so much but I won’t go into that unless you’re curious or want to yell at me about how stupid it is and ask. Go ahead.

I think you sound really REALLY stupid talking about Dean and Sams emotional incest as some kind of own to the hellers. No. It's funny to point out all the Incest Content in the canon to people who pearl clutch and threaten to kill people who enjoy said content.

I’m begging you to at least make even an ounce of sense because your ‘meta’ isn’t interesting in the least. it’s fucking boring and frankly insulting I'm not convinced you actually read it seeing as you are pointing to things I never said.

I’m also uncomfortable with your literal incest shipping I'm uncomfortable with Destiel Hot Takes. I made a side blog to complain and you write to me anonymously. I feel like we're both living our best lives here.

#anti destiel

1 note · View note

isleofair · 4 years ago

Text

Ok, so.

This is what I've made my peace with.

The final episode of Supernatural was such an incredibly absurd clusterfuck that it's very easy for me to ignore it as my personal canon and recognize that something somewhere along the way went very, very wrong with it.

(Acknowledging that it is the "official" canon and trying to figure out when and where things went wrong, and in which regards, can be useful in the fight for good representation of queer, disabled, abused and traumatized people, and in the fight for fans having a modicum of respect, and I will keep supporting accountability where it's needed. But it's also all very stressful, and it's not strictly required that we know The Absolute And Definitive Truth for me to start taking some good things away from the 15 years of my life I spent watching this show.)

The narrative of season 15, and actually at least seasons 8 and afterwards, up to and including 15x18, was in good part layered, cohesive and very clearly going to some interesting places.

(And they can try to pry canonically queer-and-in-love-with-Dean Cas out of my cold dead hands, but they'll fail even then. Cas is ours now and we're never giving him back.)

15x19 is bad but, taken into account who wrote it, is still, I'd say, mostly acceptable as a Supernatural episode in the scheme of the narrative we were getting (minus of course the lack of Dean asking Jack to bring Cas back and the lack of Sam even mentioning Eileen). So I can choose to take parts of it and leave some others. (Jack leaving makes some sense but that doesn't mean I have to like it, for one thing.) (And since my brain is mine, we can totally do away with all the EWgenie stuff that shall not even be named.)

All I decide to take from 15x20 is the possibility of a restructured Heaven (that will be great for when the story actually finishes), the notion that it's evidently possible to get Cas out of the Empty (of course), and I guess maybe them keeping Miracle. Dogs deserve everything.

Everything else can get utterly incinerated in the trash fire that the episode already is.

As far as I'm concerned, the delirious level reached by the (delicious) meta in the last season, which literally tells us the story needs to be taken away from its author, mean the story can transcend the show itself and it now belongs to the characters. To the fans. To us.

(Misha has, after all, repeatedly encouraged us to write our own story, and while it's sad and unfair and enraging that he has to say that, that we have to do that, you know what, I'll do it, because it makes me feel better and I deserve it.)

Destiel is still, somehow, the greatest love story ever told.

I choose to give it, and the story of Supernatural in general, a good, meaningful ending in my mindscape. I am thankful to meta writers and everyone here for helping me see the structure and the direction of the story up to the point it got horribly lost, because it made my view of that ending very clear.

So thank you, guys. Here's to you.

#Supernatural #supernatural spoilers #spn spoilers #Destiel #Choices #Peace of mind #Fandom #Thanks #The greatest love story ever told

8 notes · View notes

backdraft-bimbo · 4 years ago

Text

s15 review (ish)

Just messily throwing my thoughts out here. I got some pros, and I got some cons. It’s not all negative fyi, and before I dive into this I’m gonna rate s15 like a 6.5/10 overall.

For starters: the usage of Carry On My Wayward Son in 15x20 completely screws the show’s morals in the end. “There’ll be peace when you are done”? Oh let me tell you, the stone-cold irony.

That song is about hope. Supernatural, of all shows, chose a song revolving around the concept that one day, the suffering will end, and there will be a light at the end of the tunnel–peace.

Dean thought he might have a chance at peace when Chuck got demoted, he hoped Sam could live on with a clear grief-free mind, and he wanted to have Castiel in the end. He thought, and we all thought so too, but the show writers decided, nah, tragic shock factor overrules seasons of character development and the entire fandom loudly demanding a happy ending for these characters we’ve adored for years. The writers brushed aside the discomfort and disapproval of the stars of Supernatural themselves as well. And I’m curious as to why. Why is the dynamic of the actors and fans so starkly different from those who had a say in writing 15x20? (The actors and fandom are more in tune with each other, while the writers have become detached and unaware of their own storytelling.) But that’s for another time, and I digress.

My main point here, and one of my biggest bones to pick with the finale is the unnecessary death. Tragic endings only work well if done right.

If death has a legitimate purpose in the story, by all means, utilize it. If it’s only there to make the audience turn their heads in shock, maybe reconsider. Death can be used in a variety of ways: to stir up empathy, bring an arc full-circle, a catalyst for another character’s arc, consideration of morality, et cetera, et cetera. But it should never be a last minute decision. It should at least have been foreshadowed if Dean was going to die, like in the earlier seasons when he made the deal for Sam’s life. As tragic as his death was then, we understood why it was done, instead of with the finale which left us wondering why the Hell would they do that? with a nasty taste in our mouths.

Let me throw out an example of a well-written tragedy: Merlin. Even though (spoiler alert) one of the main characters died at the end, it was not to send the message that death is the superior of all storytelling, which is what Supernatural would have us believe in the finale. Merlin does it well because the entire show essentially builds up to the tragic death/destiny of King Arthur via ominous foreshadowing, but it redeems his character along the way to show that death is not the “ultimate redeemer.” Merlin has a theme of inescapable destiny (i.e. Arthur’s death), and yet by the end of the show you still love the characters and plot because they hold meaning. That’s one of the reasons its fandom is still so active–it ended tragically, but there is hope in the end, hope that Arthur will one day return to Merlin when the need for him is greatest.

Supernatural, Voltron, and GOT all used death immaturely, especially in their last seasons. All because of bad storytelling and misuse of tragedy. There wasn’t peace in Dean’s horrifically anti-climatic death, which means there wasn’t peace for Sam, even though he made a family later on. He grieved his big brother for his entire life (or our two minutes of poorly put together montage feat. pop cover of Kansas) until he made it to Heaven after Dean’s five minute joyride in the Impala. So the message the CW is really sending out here is, “there’ll be peace when you are done, but only after you die.” Honestly, what a joke. It seems more like laziness which led to the finale; laziness regarding plot and characters and everything that made us like the show initially.

It felt more like a punch in the face to the fans/actors rather than a thank you. And maybe the CW intended it to be that way. Maybe they just got sick of people’s critiques and decided to go out with a sadistic smile and a big ol’ middle finger.

For us, peace is only attainable when the show is over, because the writers aren’t in control anymore. They can’t make anymore colossal mistakes.

On the other hand, Supernatural used tragedy right as well in s15. The reason Castiel’s death in 15x18 had less controversy than Sam and Dean’s deaths in 15x20 is because Castiel had a long, drawn-out build up with his Empty deal. It loomed over the plot of all the following seasons. We all knew it was going to come back, that Cas was going to be taken one way or another.

When the Empty got Cas, I wasn’t left with resentful questions or dissatisfaction. He went out with a bang–tears, a beautiful monologue, and I love you. I’m gonna trash the finale the rest of my life, but I will never hold back the respect I have for Cas’ s15 character arc (and Misha’s acting!). Brushing aside his impact in the finale of the show was a very bad move, but we’ve got canon queer Castiel, and essentially Destiel as well, and having that, I feel satisfaction probably equal to the distaste I have for the finale. So they kind of cancel each other out for me, personally (now that I’ve had a chance to reflect on the show as a whole and take a breather).

With COVID, it just astounds me how much time the CW had to think this over and settle on something so poorly written and inconsistent with the rest of s15. Kripke himself chose that ending, said it was right for the characters, which should really just make all our jaws drop, because that only solidifies the fact that the amount of care the fandom and actors put into these characters is tremendous in superiority to the actual show creators. It really makes me want to know now: How much of Supernatural’s genius was a mistake?

How many details were unintentional, and how many scenes were made deeper simply by accident? Was it us, with our essays and theories and blogs dedicated to unravelling the secrets of the show, who made it more beautiful in the end? Because I guarantee, if I hadn’t read posts about Supernatural having deeper meanings early on, I probably wouldn’t have watched it. I wouldn’t have seen all the parallels between characters, and I couldn’t have pieced together the unintended puzzle that is Supernatural.

Supernatural would have been way less enjoyable without the fans giving it so much meaning, and of course, without the actors’ performances. While they were done dirty in the finale, I’ve gotten to the point where I can still love the stars and their roles in the story in the long run. And whether you loved or hated the finale, it’s fun to just scream about stuff with people who are equally as invested in something as I am.

So, I guess... thanks, Supernatural. But I will be dividing my thanks out to the folks who deserve it most: the fandom, the actors, and only specific writers who remain in my graces.

#rant #supernatural #mine #review #s15 #15x20 #castiel #dean winchester #sam winchester

5 notes · View notes

holycafe · 5 years ago

Photo

Deja Vu

Coldflash Week Fall 2019: Different First Meeting

When the Oculus blew, Len didn’t die. Instead, he woke back up in the body of his past self on the night before his first ever run-in with the Flash. Now Len has a chance to do it all over again; what changes would he make this time around?

(I have a lot of edits and fics for this ship as well as destiel, sterek, etc. My masterposts can be found here. If you’re on a desktop site then you can just jump on over to my page to view the rest of my coldflash edits.)

A full fanfic for this will be on the way soon (hopefully), but please accept the following couple of extracts in the meantime and, if you feel inspired by this post, feel free to run with it yourself! I only ask that you give me credit for the idea.

[] [] []

The taste of Sara's lips lingered on his tongue. Len hoped she'd gotten away. He hoped they all had. His team. He'd never been much of a team player in the past, but that was before he'd joined the Legends. And look where it had left him: holding onto a device that was set to blow at any second.

All things considered, Len supposed this was a good way to go. He wondered what Barry would think of him now. What would the Flash say once he learnt that Len had died a hero? Would Barry mourn him? Maybe. He was a god damn bleeding heart if ever Len had known one.

When the Time Masters surrounded him, Len had time for one last line. One last snarky comment. He'd make sure it was a good one.

"No strings on me," Len said, and he closed his eyes to the blinding light filling the room.

His last thought was of Lisa.

He supposed he should have expected that... his sister had always loved that damn film and insisted on watching it with him every birthday. Though he'd missed it last year, having been recently arrested for killing their father, so she'd had to come to visit him in prison instead. Lisa forgave Len that though, saying Lewis Snart's death was a better present than she could have asked for and more than made up for one skipped birthday. She'd made him promise not to miss her next one, though... it seemed like Len was going to be breaking that promise. He supposed she'd have to find someone else to carry on that tradition with her from now on. Maybe it would be Cisco? He was a good guy, and it was obvious to Len just how much the two cared for each other. If it wasn’t Cisco, though, Len just had to hope it wasn’t Rosa either; she’d messed with Lisa’s heart too much already.

But, whoever it was, they had better take good care of his little sister or Len would come back to personally haunt their ass.

No strings on me.

No strings on me…

"There are no strings on me!"

Len sat forward with a jolt, panting heavily as his mind swam with mental whiplash. It took him far too long to blink away his confusion and recognise where he was.

"Lenny? What's wrong? Are you okay?" Lisa was asking, placing her hand on his back. He tried not to cringe away from her touch

"You have no strings, your arms is free, to love me by the Zuider Zee," the song continued.

"Yeah..." he said slowly, looking away from Pinocchio dancing away on the TV to Lisa. Slowly, he settled back down on his sister's sofa. "Yeah, I'm fine." His heart was racing, and he was still panting, but he was calming down again now. "Just a bad dream." But it had felt like so much more than that... it had felt real.

"You fell asleep while watching Pinocchio?" Lisa asked, looking thoroughly unimpressed. She really did love this film. "It's not even nine o'clock. And it's my birthday!"

"Sorry, Sis," Len shrugged. He didn't have much else to say. The longer his eyes were open, the more faded the dream felt. Of course, it hadn't been real... Len internally chided himself for even considering that a possibility. Speedsters and immortals and time travel? That stuff could never really exist! It had just been a dream. A very, very weird dream.

"You're getting old, Lenny," his sister teased, and Len rolled his eyes.

[] [] []

The next morning, s Leonard and his team rode down the armoured van, Len could feel his heart racing in his chest. But he couldn’t let some dream interfere with his heist. He’d been planning it for months, and it was set to be the biggest haul of his career. He and all of his crew would be walking away with at least two mil’ each. He wasn’t about to bail out now.

So, Len continued on. However, he couldn’t help but throw glances over his shoulder as he dismounted his bike and grabbed the liquid nitrogen containers to bust open the door. And when the red blur did, in fact, come rushing to the rescue, Len didn’t hang around to check it out as he’d done in his dream. He jumped on his bike and got the hell out of dodge, mask still firmly in place.

Back at the safe house, Len’s mind was spinning. His dream… it couldn’t have been real. Could it? It wasn’t possible. But neither was the red blur which had interrupted his heist. Len stared at the screen, the surveillance footage he’d swiped from the van playing under his sharp gaze. It was exactly as Len had remembered it in his dream. Everything was happening in precisely the same way. The thought made Len’s stomach twist into knots. If the dream was real… then that meant that Len had only eighteen months left before he died.

But, what a hell of an eighteen months they would be: becoming Captain Cold, going up against the mob, getting rid of Lewis once and for all, travelling through time, and doing and taking whatever he wanted whenever he wanted.

Well, almost…

There was one thing that Len found himself wanting desperately. One person. Someone that Len would have never expected to fall for…

And Len supposed that that was it: that was how he could find out, once and for all, whether this dream of his was coming true or not. Len would have to track down Barry Allen. If he was real, then this whole thing, whatever it was, must be real too.

That was how he found himself inside CC Jitters the next morning, waiting on an impossible man.

His dream-self had done surveillance on Barry from the moment he’d squeezed the man’s name from Cisco’s lips. Months of monitoring his comings and goings. He’d learnt everything that he possibly could about Barry, stopping only once Len had found the young man getting cosy with a female cop and noticed the way his gut twisted with jealousy at the sight of the pair… But that wouldn’t be for another year yet.

In Len’s dream, the Flash had frequented this coffee shop day in and day out. So, if Len wanted to run into him, then this was the place to do it.

Len didn’t have long to wait before the door opened and in walked Barry Allen and Iris West. Iris patted her friend on the shoulder and moved behind the counter to put on an apron. But Len’s eyes were trained on Barry. He was dressed like a preschool teacher in a sweater vest and shirt with a pair of slim-fit jeans. It looked good on him, though Len would be surprised if he found anything that looked bad on this man.

The goody type didn’t usually do it for Len, but there was so much more to Barry than met the eye and thus, regardless, Len found his heart racing frantically against his chest. Though, maybe his reaction was less about seeing Barry again and more about the crushing realisation that his dream had been real.

Len couldn’t understand how that was possible. He’d dreamt about the future. But how? He wasn’t a meta… was he?

Barry was leaning on the counter now and talking to his friend. From this angle, Len could just about see the grin on the Flash’s face. One part of Len wanted to stay and watch this impossible man some more, but another part of him needed time to think things over. Getting up, Len shrugged his coat back on over his shoulders and made to leave the café. But then someone was tripping up and crashing into him.

Len stumbled, shooting a hand out to a nearby post, and steadying himself and the other man before they both went hurtling to the floor. He looked down to find Barry Allen’s big green eyes looking back up at him, the to-go cup he’d been holding slipping to the floor and spilling all over Len’s shoes. Though, Len realised he didn’t quite mind that. He could always buy a new pair.

“Oh my God, I am so sorry!” Barry said, pulling himself up. “I was backing up, and I wasn’t looking where I was going. And I… I’ll pay for your dry cleaning!” Barry continued. Len looked down at himself, seeing that some of the coffee had indeed also splattered against his new coat. Len didn’t mind that either. Barry twisted to grab his wallet from his jeans pocket, and Len realised he was still holding onto Barry’s shoulder; he quickly let go.

“They’re only clothes,” Len said. He sounded breathless. He was breathless. Len was working without a plan here, and he always had a plan. He hadn’t intended to meet Barry today, but now that he had… "Let me buy you another drink,” Len said, slipping into his drawl like putting on a good pair of gloves. He watched Barry closely and was happy to see a brush of colour sweep across the younger man’s cheeks.

"But, I was the one who bumped into you,” Barry protested, still holding his wallet as though he was going to insist on paying. Len placed his hand purposefully over Barry’s.

"Yeah, you were," Len said, smirking. He enjoyed the way that Barry grinned at him in return. Their relationship in the dream had been much more difficult. But this? This was easy. "You look like a caramel latte, kind of guy."

"How did you know?"

"Call it a hunch," Len shrugged. The truth was, he remembered it being Barry’s go-to drink in his dream. Though, his friends would often order a Flash for him as a joke. Len would have liked to make that same joke now, but that particular drink wasn’t on the menu… yet. “Also,” Len said, dipping down to pick the spilt disposable coffee cup up off the floor, "it's written on your cup."

"Oh, right," Barry laughed. Len, smirk still in place, stepped around the spill to toss the now-empty cup in the trash at the same time that Iris came over with a mop. Barry apologised to her, but she only gave Barry a not-so-subtle wink and nodded with her head for Barry to follow Len to the counter. Barry had turned an even brighter shade of red by this point.

Len ordered the man’s drink and then leant back against the counter, elbows propped up behind him and taking his time to slowly look Barry up and down.

“So, Barry, do you make a habit of running into people at coffee shops or am I just lucky?” Len drawled, and Barry scratched nervously at the back of his neck.

“Well, I try not to,” Barry laughed. “Not everyone’s as nice about it as you are,” he said, and Len almost burst out laughing. He didn’t think anyone had ever called him ‘nice’ before. “Wait, you know my name?” Barry asked. But he quickly shook his head and tapped his crown in a ‘duh’ gesture. “The coffee cup,” he said, answering his own question. “Though, now I’m at a disadvantage because I don’t know your name.”

“Hmm,” Len uttered. He leisurely looked Barry up and down one last time, drawing it out and enjoying how the younger man squirmed under his gaze. “I think we can rectify that,” Len said eventually, then he quickly pushed back off the counter and turned around to grab a napkin. He took a pen out of his coat pocket and scrawled his name and number down. By the time he was done, Barry’s order was ready, so he handed both the cup and napkin to the speedster at the same time. "You can run into me anytime, Barry," he winked and then sauntered out of the coffee shop before Barry could do anything more than blush.

#cffall19 #leonard snart #len x barry #barry allen #coldflash #lenarry #dc #my aus #pieprincesswritesdc #pieprincesswritescoldflash #pieprincesswritesfics

304 notes · View notes

shirtlesssammy · 5 years ago

Text

15x04: Atomic Monsters

Then:

Becky was an obsessed, gross fangirl, and it was not awesome.

Now:

We open to the bunker under attack. Dean is in full beard and kicking ass. Boy, the director of this episode sure knows how to make Dean pretty. He makes it to the bunker’s kitchen to find Benny (!!!!) on the floor dying.

I don’t rewatch Taxi Driver for a reason, Show. I loved Benny and Dean’s friendship, so while this was great just to have him back for old time’s sake, it still makes me sad that he’s still gone. (And spoiler, this is Sam’s dream. I just like to think about how Sam still thinks about this friendship he didn’t want Dean to have and it haunts him to this day.)

Dean’s looking for someone. He walks into the war room and finds him: Sam, all powerful on demon blood. Dean tries reasoning with his brother, but he’s past all that. Sam kills another hunter sneaking up on them, and then he kills Dean.

Sam wakes up from his nightmare, gasping. SAM!

He heads to the kitchen to find Dean looking for cases, drinking coffee, and eating a plate of bacon. Dean says it’s veggie bacon when Sam tries to turn down eat some. Sam also tells Dean that his self-proclaimed nickname “Meat Man” isn’t what he thinks it means. Dean apparently knows exactly what it means and he’s standing by it. Ahem. Dean also calls Sam out on not handling their recent losses. The Just Brothers show is a real bummer.

Anyway, the case Dean found is in Iowa. There’s been a string of cattle mutilations and a young woman’s body found ripped to pieces.

Also, it was real bacon and Dean’s a dick for trying to trick Sam into eating it.

At Beaverdale High School, Sam learns Susie, the vic, was a popular girl and there’s going to be a prayer vigil for her at the school. Two parents show up asking about the game getting canceled --or rescheduled. They’re just can’t have that happen. There was going to be a scout coming to that game for their son, Billy.

Sam is appalled (and I’m sad for him, so close to losing family he cared about.) The vice principal shuts down the pushy parents, and after they leave mutters, “I swear, the parents are worse than the kids.”

Sam meets back up with Dean (eating again). Dean was just at the morgue and found a vamp fang. This one’s a weird one. Vamps don’t usually tear their victims apart. Also, she didn’t even try to fight off her attacker.

Later that night, a fellow student leaves the school only to be attacked by the camera in the bushes!!

Sam and Dean check out where Susie was found. No blood means she was killed elsewhere and her body was dumped in the woods. Sam soliloquies about how taking care of the monsters is their job and they carry the weight of everyone. Dean drinks from his flask. They are coping SO WELL, guys!

Sam gets a call that another girl is missing.

WHOA. Becky, fangirl and Sam kidnapper extraordinaire, is married with kids and is looking forward to having the house to herself for the day. Just as her husband and kids pull away, she sees her old ex, Chuck, across the street. Run, Becky, Run! Chuck wants to talk. UGH.

The VP fills the brothers in on the new missing teen.

Chuck checks out Becky’s maquettes and learns that she’s a successful Etsy seller of Supernatural merchandise. She fesses up to how wrong what she did to Sam was, admitted to counseling. She kept writing. She wrote the good stuff, amirite? Chuck disagrees and thinks that people like the monsters. (Natasha: raises hand.) Becky’s a busy person so Chuck better cut to the chase here. Chuck won’t let the whole monster thing go.

Chuck admits to having a falling out with the Winchesters. He also tells Becky that his sister won’t help, because “she sucks.” Becky can’t believe that Chuck thinks he can come crawling back to her. She’s got a good life now. She doesn’t need him.

Becky’s nice though (can’t believe I just wrote those words), and asks Chuck, what makes him happy. Writing. She tells him he has to write.

Back at the high school, Dean is interviewing a man in a beaver suit while eating a hot dog.

JESUS CHRIST ON A CRACKER. (I’m conducting an experiment with my GA co-worker about Dean is bi-Dean/Cas. I can’t wait to hear what she says about this. She did call The Breakup a “bro-fight” so I’ll keep you all posted.)

In the school gymnasium, Billy and Veronica bond over losing Susie. Billy’s mom interrupts and he runs away.

The third-in-line-to-the-throne cheerleader practices her eulogy alone in a gym. I obsessed over this scene in this post about stories, because it was such a strange beat in the episode. The Winchesters confront her. They ask her to head off with them alone (GURL never do that with anyone you don’t know) when Sam notices that she wears braces.

Sam and Dean leave the gym in a huff. Vampires don’t wear braces! Foiled by braces yet again! They go back to the drawing board.

We finally get a peek in the happy lacrosse family’s home. Everyone’s argumentative and on edge, and when we get a closeup of the dad he’s washing blood off his hands in the sink.

The camera pans through the house to the garage where the kidnapped cheerleader, Tori, lies bound and gagged. UGH.

Chuck experiences the downside of Becky-in-momland: no booze! Chuck complains that he can no longer see Sam and Dean in his head and subtly touches his hidden bullet wound. Ooooo. Becky lays out some truths for Chuck. “You’re a writer. A writer who’s not writing. And when a writer’s not writing, they feel sad and they get lost. Why do I feel this way? Why am I so sad and lost? And what is all this naval gazing and hair pulling amount to in the end? Procrastination. Distraction. Just one million ways the writer avoids doing the one thing that is guaranteed to make the writer feel better. Which is…”

“Writing,” Chuck finishes the thought. Go Becky! Except…um…now Chuck is inspired to write again. And when Chuck writes? The world ends.

Chuck takes over Becky’s computer (RUDE) and starts his next opus on supernaturalstory-onebillionparallelworlds.com.

Sam and Dean check out the security footage from the night Tori was abducted. They nab a suspicious vehicle and a license plate which lands them at...Billy’s house.

At Billy’s house, strife continues to be the word of the day. The parents argue that they want what’s best for Billy - whatever that is. Sam and Dean head inside, looking as dangerous as panthers.

Sam heads for the garage while Dean cues the dad into a little fun fact: they’re not FBI. No, they’re considerably scarier than the FBI. Dean pulls out a machete which is probably NOT FIELD ISSUE OKAY.

Sam discovers that the girl has been hooked up to an IV - she’s become a slow-release food source. The mom interrupts them with a GUN.

Danger mom escorts Sam and the cheerleader back to the living room where they have a gun vs. machete stand-off. Obviously Dean would win this matchup, okay? He’d probably, idk, stop the bullets in his teeth or something.

Becky reads over Chuck’s work. She adores it! Chuck pushes for some notes. She asks for higher stakes and while we get distracted by her rambling about the lack of classic rock and Cas, Chuck’s expression grows GRIM and DARK and VERY SCARY. (Good job Rob, you talented cinnamon roll!)

“You want jeopardy? You want danger? I’ll give you danger.” Thanks for the trip to CREEPY TOWN, Chuck.

Billy heads downstairs and witnesses the confrontation between the Winchesters and his parents. Dean does his usual monologue, explaining how the dad got turned into a vamp, tried to eat cows, and started eating teen girls instead. But Sam observes Billy and points out something very different. “It’s not the dad, it’s the son.” Billy confesses: he was kissing his girlfriend when he lost control and ate her instead. Man, I HATE it when that happens.

Billy told his parents, who covered it up. They kidnapped Tori as a longer term feed option. But now their son lays it all out. He’ll take the fall for everything, including Tori’s kidnapping and assault. And he’ll take a one-way ride with the Winchesters.

UGH now everything is terrible. Dean executes the son in a dark wooded area as the rest of the world washes any trace of the supernatural away.

Back with Chuck, Becky finishes reading his higher-stakes take. She’s disturbed. “You can’t,” she pleads. “This is just an ending.”

“Yeah,” Chuck says, pleased. “I don’t know how I’m getting there, but I know where I’m going.” That destination, to be specific, is just a tombstone with the word WINCHESTER on it. (Can I get a hell yeah for this meta-awareness and roundabout promise that we WON’T get this ending?)

“You can’t do this to the fans!” Becky insists. But she’s prevented from saying more by her husband’s sudden return. She starts to explain the presence of Chuck, when Chuck just ZAPS her husband out of existence. Her kids call out and BOOM they’re gone too. I start to get worried that we’re gonna have some sort of icky reverse-Misery situation here when Chuck decides to zap Becky away as well. (Can’t wait until Becky kills God at the end of the series, guys!)

In the car, Sam directly parallels Billy to Jack. Dean admits that he wanted to “cash out” in the crypt, but that Sam’s insistence that they matter pulled him back. (Me: RLY?) Sam’s bitter. Dean’s tense. “We still do the job,” Dean says. “We do it for Jack. For mom. For Rowena. We owe it to anybody who has ever given a damn about us to keep putting one foot in front of the other. No matter what.”

Dean goes on to say that with Chuck gone, they’re finally free to “move on” and EXCUSE ME while I go throw myself into a Destiel trash bin at that phrasing. Sam’s not in the Destiel trash bin with me, because he tells us he still mourns Jessica and now we’re HURTING for other reasons. SAM BBY!

Back at Becky’s house Chuck continues to write...INSIDIOUSLY. I can’t wait for Chuck’s next book: Sad Boys in the Impala.

______________________________

Read These Quotes Backward for a Demonic Spell:

The end of the world is the end of the world

They have no idea what’s out there

But people LIKE monsters

I need wine

Why am I so sad and lost? And what is all this naval gazing and hair pulling amount to in the end? Procrastination. Distraction. Just one a million ways the writer avoids doing the one thing that is guaranteed to make the writer feel better.

Nobody even mentions Cas

To see your child in pain rips your heart out

We can bury them out back. Under the peonies. Everything is going to be FINE

Fans are gonna love it

Oh, Becky. I can do anything. I’m a writer

We do the ugly things so that people can live happy

Monsters are cool. What? They’re all teeth!

______________________________

#spn recap #spn 15x04 #atomic monsters #dean winchester #sam winchester #chuck shurley #becky rosen #benny lafitte #supernatural season 15

142 notes · View notes

whelvenwings · 5 years ago

Text

Fallout

4.4k, destiel, AU: no supernatural, skydiving, mutual pining

Dean might have slightly underplayed how much he hates planes, and that might just have come back to bite him in the ass. He's just been asked to fly up to a height of thousands of feet, for moral support in the plane before Castiel does a skydive for charity. It's the nightmare scenario - but it might just give Dean the push he needs to finally tell his friend Castiel something he's been meaning to tell him for a very, very long time.

read it here on AO3 if you prefer!

————————————————–

This was actually happening.

Dean was really, truly, and in actual fact inside a plane. A plane that was not on the ground. A plane that was very much in the air. Engine roaring. Pilot in control. Clouds moving serenely past the window.

He couldn’t breathe, obviously. But he was doing his best to keep that to himself. He was here for a reason, a specific and good reason - obviously. Nothing less that the best and most specific of reasons could have got him on board. He had to focus on that reason.

On that person, actually. Who was sitting opposite him.

Castiel looked nervous. In all their four years of friendship, Dean had never seen his jaw clenched so tight. Even still, the giveaway was a small one, and Dean thought that to anyone who’d never met him, Castiel would probably have looked entirely cool with the fact that in less than a minute, he was going to be jumping out of this plane.

Dean was not remotely cool. Dean had gone through the five stages of grief on the ascent, and was now hovering somewhere in the zone of numb acceptance. He leaned forwards, towards Castiel.

“Remind me why you’re doing this again,” Dean said to him, speaking loudly so that he could be heard over the sound of the plane’s engines. Castiel smiled.

“To raise a lot of money for a good cause,” he said.

“And remind me why I’m here?”

“You said if I was going to throw away my life on something this stupid, you were at least going to wave me goodbye before I did it,” Castiel said.

That was right. Dean clearly remembered thinking that if he was going to lose Castiel to a parachuting accident, Dean was going to be with him until the last possible moment. And maybe, at that last possible moment, he’d have the guts to say to Castiel… well. To say goodbye to him, anyway.

“Also,” Castiel said, “I asked if you’d come.”

And there it was. Dean could’ve let go of the other stuff - maybe - but Castiel had asked him. The thing was, Dean might have decided to undersell how much he hated planes, over the course of the time they’d known each other - there was no need to make Cas think he was a baby - but it had really come back to bite him in the ass. Castiel would never have asked if he’d known that for Dean, being on a plane was like swallowing a pill labelled panic and feel like you’re dying. But Castiel hadn’t known, and he had asked. And now here Dean was.

On a goddamn plane.

“You’re fine,” Castiel said, apparently catching the expression on Dean’s face. “You’re wearing a parachute. Nothing’s going to go wrong.”

“I’m not jumping,” Dean said hastily. The part of him that wasn’t freaking out rolled its eyes. Obviously he wasn’t jumping, and Castiel knew that - but the words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Some primal part of him apparently needed it to be entirely clear that he was absolutely not going to be dropping out of this plane.

“I know. It just makes me feel better than you’re wearing one, just in case,” Castiel said. “And you know how to use it, right? Because I can show you again…”

“You showed me three times already. Worry about yourself,” Dean grunted. Normally, he’d have teased Castiel about fussing over him, but worry was shaving away his sense of humour.

“I’ve done this lots of times,” Castiel said. “Before we met, I used to do it monthly. I’ll be fine.”

“I’m just worried about making rent if you, you know, go splat,” Dean said. “You don’t have life insurance and a will made out to me, do you?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“Any rich family members I could sponge off?”

“Lots. But you never liked my aunts and uncles.”

“Some of them are okay,” Dean said. “Naomi creeps me out.”

“She’s fine,” Castiel said.

“She’s dead behind the eyes,” Dean said. It was helping to talk. Things felt normal when they talked. He could forget where he was, and what was about to happen.

“Concussed, at most,” Castiel said, his mouth twitching.

At the front of the plane, the pilot turned around. He called something that Dean couldn’t hear, but apparently made sense to Castiel, who began to pull on straps and tug at his jumpsuit and tap on the pair of goggles on the top of his head to make sure they were still there.

Dean was struck by a sudden sense of urgency.

“Cas?” he said.

Castiel didn’t hear him.

“Cas?”

This time, Castiel turned to look, eyes expectant.

“You know how we’ve been friends for, you know, four years now…”

“I’m going to be fine, Dean.”

“I know, I know.” Dean chewed his lip as Castiel went back to his straps. “Just… don’t… I mean, we’ve really…”

He stumbled to a stop.

Castiel watched him, still adjusting one of the straps on his jumpsuit. The expression on his face was slightly impatient.

Dean’s mouth tried to form words, and failed. He couldn’t say it. Couldn’t say any of it.

Couldn’t say what it had meant to him to meet Castiel during the worst year of his life, when he’d just lost both his parents.

Couldn’t say how much their friendship had kept him going, through the worst of times.

Couldn’t say how much he looked forward to their quiet movie nights. Their weird, intense, deep discussions. Castiel was the first person Dean had met in adulthood who actually thought a dumbass mechanic might have something interesting to say, and talked to him about real shit, important shit. And then there were the times they both lost it completely over something only they would find funny, Dean laughing out loud and Castiel’s shoulders shaking as he covered his eyes with his hand.

Dean couldn’t say how much he thought about Castiel, how often he noticed things, how much he felt. It was so much. It was so goddamn much, and he’d never breathed a word. Obviously. Never told a single soul. He wouldn’t know how to begin to twist even a single sentence together.

He still couldn’t. Even now, when he could be about to lose Castiel forever - yeah, sure, Castiel would roll his eyes at that, but the fact remained that Castiel was about to jump out of a very high plane and head downward at high speed towards some very hard ground - even now, he couldn’t force the words out. What if Castiel didn’t want to hear them? What if he was horrified? What if the last memory Dean had of Castiel was of being rejected, with Castiel hating him for keeping his feelings a secret for so long, their trust broken?

And even if that wasn’t his last memory - what if Castiel landed completely okay, and then Dean had to explain?

Either way, he was going to be dealing with some fallout.

Dean couldn’t do it. He couldn’t.

He was going to sit quietly and support his friend on his stupid ridiculous charity jump, and then he was going to go home with Castiel afterwards and things were going to go back to how they’d been for years, now. Just the normal things: cooking together, watching TV together, hiding his smile when he watched Castiel concentrating or talking about something he was passionate about, trying not to ever look too long or feel too much and failing, doing laundry together, taking out the trash. Just the usual.

One day, Castiel was going to meet someone he actually liked, and he was going to tell that person that he liked them, and they were obviously going to like him back because who wouldn’t, and when he heard about it for the first time Dean was going to have to politely excuse himself so that he could go into the woods somewhere and yell and yell and maybe never come back. Maybe just become that guy who lives in the woods and yells a lot. It was going to hurt like - like nothing Dean had ever felt before. He knew it in the same way he knew, by looking at a knife, that the pointy end shouldn’t go in him. The fun part was, he wasn’t the one holding the knife. That was Castiel.

And Castiel would find someone. Dean knew that Castiel hoped he’d be in a relationship with someone he loved one day. They’d talked about it. And when Castiel found what he wanted, he wouldn’t be too afraid to take it, and hold it, when he’d found it. Because Castiel wasn’t afraid, not like Dean. Castiel jumped out of planes.

“Stop,” Castiel said, jerking Dean back to the present. “I can tell you’re thinking about how I’m about to - how did you so colourfully put it? ‘Go splat’?”

Dean had been more focused on the way he himself was going to go splat, emotionally speaking, one day. But he held up his hands and said,

“Guilty as charged. Like I said. I just don’t want to lose your half of the rent money, dude.”

“I’m sure you’d find another roommate.”

There was something in the way Castiel said it that made Dean frown.

“Nah,” he said.

Castiel looked up at him.

“What?” he asked.

“If you - you know - I wouldn’t find a new roommate. I’d move out.”

“Leave our place?” Castiel looked taken aback. “But… you spent so long decorating it. You’d lose your accent walls. And your faucets. You love your faucets.”

Dean took a moment to curse the fact that Castiel knew how much he cared about the taps in his home, but not the person he shared it with. How had this happened. Who was he.

“I’d sell it,” Dean said solidly.

“It’s so perfectly placed for your work…”

“I’d sell it, Cas! It doesn’t even matter, anyway. Nothing bad is gonna happen.”

Castiel heard the note of finality in Dean’s tone and let it go. Even still, Dean could see thoughts whirring in Castiel’s mind, in just the way Dean usually tried to prevent. If Castiel was going to find out that Dean had feelings for him, Dean wanted it to be on purpose, not by accident: not because Dean said slightly too much and Castiel figured it out, but because Dean finally had the guts to say something. Anything else felt like a cop-out.

The plane was starting to rattle and jerk a little. Dean closed his eyes, whole body tensing up. The cabin was a sparse one, with this plane being used mostly just to ferry people up a few thousand feet so that they could throw themselves out of it, so far as Dean knew. Room to stand up and walk a little way, seats along the sides, handles on the ceiling to grip onto. There were no in-flight snacks or home comforts to make up for the fact that he was trapped in a prison at lethal altitude.

When he opened his eyes again, Castiel was standing up and talking to the pilot. Dean saw him nod, and then he went over to the door, which was on one side of the cabin, the side opposite where Dean was sitting. Dean swallowed hard. If he was going to do it, it had to be now.

He opened his mouth, and then closed it.

Castiel had his hand on the door.

Dean opened his mouth again, and said,

“Cas -”

He said it just as Castiel opened the door, and the sudden rush of air stole the sound. Castiel didn’t turn around. Dean watched him framed there in the doorway of the plane, hair buffeted by the wind.

Fuck.

Castiel looked ready to jump. He was bracing his hands on either side of the door. He had his goggles pulled down. It seemed like he was about to go. Was he even going to look back at Dean? With the clumsiness of panic, Dean fumbled with the straps that held him in his seat. He had to get over to Castiel, had to tell him - something, at least. Just something. He unclipped himself.

Dean stood up. He felt more steady on his feet than he’d expected. He just had to focus on Castiel, and not think about the door of the plane being wide open, or the fact that he was thousands of feet above the ground, or how easily he could just slip and fall out -

Dean saw Castiel shift, turning his head to look back over his shoulder towards Dean - and then Castiel saw Dean standing up, and his expression melted into concern faster than Dean had ever seen.

“What are you doing?” he called, over the roar of the plane.

“I’m coming to - to say -”

“Sit down! It’s not safe!”

“Cas, I’ve gotta tell you -”

“Sit down!”

From up front, Dean thought he could hear the pilot yelling something. Dean gritted his teeth.

“Cas,” he said, and Castiel turned away from the door. He grabbed onto one of the handles hanging from the plane cabin’s ceiling, and looked at Dean. Sharply, he pulled up his goggles, so they rested on top of his head again.

“What?” he demanded.

Dean reached for words that weren’t there.

Castiel reached for Dean’s hand, and Dean’s heart leapt for a second - but then Castiel just grabbed him by the wrist and lifted his hand to hook into another one of the ceiling handles. Dean hung onto it.

And Castiel looked at Dean, eyes searching his face, trying to understand. At first, he looked as though a part of him was finding this slightly funny, even though his worry - but then he seemed to pick up on Dean’s indecision, his urgency, and the little smile around his eyes faded.

It was time to say something. Now was the moment. There had been at least three now was the moment moments, and he’d missed all of them so far, so this really had to be the moment. But Dean didn’t know what to do, what to say. He could only look at Castiel, and look at him, and look at him.

He saw Castiel. His friend. His closest friend. His closest, bravest, most stubborn asshole friend. About to make a jump. He saw him, and he didn’t know what to say to him.

Dean’s gaze traced over Castiel’s face.

The plane shuddered, and Dean felt a wave of panic flood him. With his free hand, he grabbed onto Castiel’s shoulder to steady himself. The two of them swayed closer together.

Dean breathed in sharply.

He couldn’t stop looking into Castiel’s eyes. Couldn’t figure out what to say. They were closer than they’d ever been, closer than Dean ever let them be around their home. He always kept such careful distances and saved touch for his imagination. But now here they were, Dean’s hand already on Castiel’s shoulder, in each other’s space.

Just where Dean wanted to be. And couldn’t be. He couldn’t be here, couldn’t do this. He was going to lose Castiel. He was going to lose him, actually lose him, like this. It wasn’t a game, it wasn’t fake or pretend - it was real life, and in real life, you lost people unless you did everything right. The right thing to do was to move his hand and go back and sit down. He should move his hand.

He should move his hand.

He wasn’t moving his hand.

Castiel’s expression was changing, his eyes on Dean’s more intense. There was a question there, an understanding that something was happening and a tilt to his head that asked what Dean was going to do about it, what he wanted. Dean didn’t know how to answer. Didn’t know how to move, even. He was locked in place - one hand on Castiel’s shoulder, not taking it away, not giving anything more. Just enough to be close but not as close as he wanted, needed.

The moment see-sawed. Dean knew he could pull back, let go, step away, go sit down.

Or, Dean knew, he could lean forward. Not quickly, but enough - enough that Castiel would know what Dean wanted, and then he could choose whether to give it or not. And obviously he would choose not to. Because if someone as brave as Castiel had wanted to be with Dean, Dean would already know about it. So doing that would be ridiculous, stupid, stupid, as stupid as jumping out of a plane.

Dean didn’t make jumps. He didn’t do heights. He didn’t do danger. He did the right thing, the silent thing, the not-really-doing-or-saying-anything thing. And he was careful, he was careful, he was always so careful never to show any of it, not a word of it, not a whisper, not a glance.

Even still, though, their plane was up high. The air currents swirled. The pilot was yelling something again, not paying enough attention to the plane itself. Castiel, with his own mind and choices and story, was opposite him. Dean could do everything completely perfectly, be completely silent and do nothing to give Castiel a reason to leave - and even still, there were a hundred ways, a thousand ways that he could lose Castiel just in this exact moment.

Maybe that was scary. Maybe that was terrible. But there was no way off the plane, they were here. This was it. This was what they had.

Dean wanted to hide. He wanted go on with it as he had been. He could go on and on being tired, and tired, and right, and silent.

But somewhere deeper inside him, there was a pull. More than a want, a need. A need to let go. Let go of right. Try something else. Try being something else. Honest? Open?

Real?

Real - real would be wrong sometimes. Stupid. Urgent. Honest. Real would be letting himself want something, letting himself… show that he wanted it.

He wanted Castiel to know. In his bones, he felt it. Hot and electric, the push, the need. Dean wanted Castiel to know.

In the cabin of the plane, high above the ground, mind freefalling and breath lost, Dean made his jump.

Deliberately, he lifted his chin a little, and leaned in towards Castiel, and glanced down at his lips and then back up to his eyes.

Castiel’s eyes widened.

“Dean…” he said.

Dean swallowed.

He tightened his grip on Castiel’s shoulder. All he could see as the plane moved under him was Castiel’s face, the steadiness of his eyes. And then, he felt the lightest of touches on his cheek.

Castiel’s hand, the backs of his fingers, brushed Dean’s skin. It was so fragile, so tentative. Dean closed his eyes into it, just for a half-second, before he could stop himself. When he looked back to Castiel, he saw a question in his expression. More than that. He saw a hope.

“There was something I wanted to tell you,” Castiel called to him. The wind through the plane’s cabin was so loud that he had to raise his voice even though they were so close. “Before I jumped.”

“There was?”

“Dean, I…”

They stared at each other. Just looked, and looked. Dean saw Castiel’s mouth struggling for words, half-shaping things and then abandoning them.

“Cas?” he said.

“Dean… I wanted to tell you…”

Dean raised his chin just a fraction higher.

Castiel stopped reaching for words. His eyes dropped to Dean’s lips.

“This,” he said, and then he leaned forwards, and kissed Dean.

If he’d meant the kiss to be gentle, he hadn’t reckoned on Dean meeting him in the middle, surging forwards to catch his lips. They kissed hard, not breathing and not moving and not caring, just doing this - finally, finally doing this, after so long around each other not knowing if they should or if they could. The wind raced around the cabin, tugging at them, but they paid it no attention. It was Dean, and it was Castiel, at a height of thousands of feet, wrapped into each other.

Castiel pulled back.

“That,” he said.

And then he turned, pulled down his goggles - he took a few quick steps, and he jumped.

Dean stood utterly still. Wind-ruffled, kiss-shaken, mouth ever so slightly open, dazed.

“Uh-huh,” he said, to no one. “Right.”

---

Dean marched across the field at a pace that was militaristic. The long grass where Castiel had landed reached up to Dean’s hips, but he wasn’t waiting for Castiel to make his own way out of it; he was coming to meet him. Somewhere behind him, he knew there were people following, ready to help with the parachute. Dean paid them no attention.

He could still feel the kiss burning on his lips.

Last-minute rush of adrenaline? A pity-kiss, because he’d known what Dean had wanted, and had decided to give it to him?

Or… something real?

Dean couldn’t even think it. All he could do was walk. He could stride across this field with its swaying tall green grass, single-minded. In the distance, he could see a figure walking towards him out of the sun. The shape of a person he knew. Dean headed towards him, squinting against the light.

The trees at the edge of the field rustled. Somewhere in the grass, there was the chirping of crickets. Dean breathed. The air was warm and smelled fresh - a little sharp with sap, a little sweet with the yellow ripening of a few stray ears of crop.

Dean walked. The figure ahead of him drew nearer. Not a silhouette, now, not a vague shadow. A person, a face. Blue eyes. Solemn expression.

Castiel.

They kept going until they were close to each other. It was Castiel who came to a halt first, with a few feet between them.

Dean would have been happy to walk into another kiss, another touch, but he stopped. Let Castiel take the lead. It might not have been real, he reminded himself. It might not have been real.

They stood quietly for a few seconds. Dean took a breath and let it go. Castiel wasn’t looking at him. He was twisting a piece of grass around his finger.

“Cas -”

“I’m sorry,” Castiel said.

Dean paused.

“Huh?”

“I’m sorry. I - I wanted to tell you - before I jumped - but I didn’t know how, and then…” Castiel swallowed visibly. “We can act as though it never happened. But I understand, if you don’t want to be around me right now. I can go.”

“What?”

Castiel kept twisting and twisting that grass.

“I can go,” he said.

“You want to?”

Now, Castiel looked at him.

“Don’t you want me to?”

“I… I want…”

Dean felt his shoulders tensing. He wanted to be back in the goddamn plane, turbulence pushing them close, wind too loud to really talk. Down here, in the quiet, there was nothing to make them closer than they showed they wanted to be.

The grass wavered and moved around them.

Dean closed his eyes. When he opened them, he was the one to look down, at the swaying fronds.

“I want you to be here,” he said. Low, deep. Rough. Trying, as always, to hide how careful it all felt inside, how delicate.

“Here… in this field?”

Dean wanted to just fall into the grass, face-first. Give up. But he gritted his teeth.

“Here, where… I… am,” he managed.

Castiel was quiet. Dean chanced a glance up at his face.

“You want to be…” Castiel began, and then broke off.

“Together,” Dean finished, his tone almost - almost - making it a question. But not quite. Because there was no question, not really. That was what he wanted. What he’d wanted for so, so long.

“Even though I…” Castiel gestured loosely upward, to the sky.

“It wasn’t - I didn’t - it was - fine,” Dean said.

Fine? Seriously? He was going to call the first kiss he’d ever shared with Castiel, fine? Something in him rebelled.

“No,” he said, “it was - it was - good. It was what I - god. It was what I wanted, Cas.”

When he looked at Castiel now, he couldn’t tell which was brighter. The look on Castiel’s face, or the sun behind him.

“You wanted…”

“Yeah. But you… you too?”

“Yes, Dean. Of course.” Castiel looked as though a touch of puzzlement was trying to show, but it was being utterly eclipsed by his happiness. “You didn’t know? I thought you’d known for years…”

“Wait. You’ve wanted this for years?” Dean said, and it came out a croak. “You too?”

“Dean,” Castiel said. “It’s always been you.”

Dean and Castiel stared at each other.

“We need to learn how to talk,” Dean said.

Castiel pressed his lips together, holding back laughter.

“Jesus. We really… jesus, Cas.”

Now, Castiel stepped closer to him. Now, they moved into each other’s space again, came closer. Dean had always imagined that if this ever happened - if he ever actually got the chance to step closer to Castiel, knowing that he wanted this, knowing they both wanted the same thing - he’d always imagined that he’d feel dizzy, heady, mind floating over his own body, disbelieving.

It wasn’t like that. As he moved, he felt it all. The grass against his fingertips, the way the breeze caught at his clothes. He felt clear-eyed, awake. He felt his breath in his lungs, his heartbeat - thudding hard, desperately hard, but steady.

And when Castiel touched the tips of his fingers to Dean’s cheek, he felt it shake him. Felt his legs want to go from under him. He was big and clumsy under the gentleness of the touch. But when he met Castiel’s eyes, he hoped Castiel saw in them what he felt inside: something delicate and intricate. Strong, but so carefully felt, over so many years.

Dean leaned forward, and pressed his forehead to Castiel’s. They moved slowly, now. They had time. There was no sound around them but the hushing grass. If the people who’d followed Dean for the parachute were nearby, they were leaving the pair of them well alone.

Achingly slowly, Dean moved.

Eyes closed, going by feel, chasing the warmth of Castiel’s breath, Dean kissed him.

There was no thought. He was all feeling. He was the lips on Castiel’s lips, he was the hand on Castiel’s shoulder and the hand on his back, he was feet planted on the ground. He was hot under the sun’s light and under the care in Castiel’s touch. He was awake, he was real.

It was better than he could have possibly imagined.

#whelvenwingsfic #thebloggerbloggerfun #destiel fic #deancas fic #fluff #they're so bad at talking omg #use ur words guys use themmmm

146 notes · View notes

cloverhighfivewritestoo · 5 years ago

Text

An Angel Cake for an Ex-Angel

👉 Read it on Ao3

Warning – Destiel tooth-rotting fluff / domestic fluff / human!Cas / established Destiel / Sam makes an appearance for plot’s sake.

Summary – Cas is depressed and Dean is looking to make him feel better by baking him an angel food cake (yeah he fails a few times).

w/c – 2.4k

A/N – Sometimes you sit to work on your wip and something pops up on tumblr and the muse hits you and you write a whole ‘nother fic instead. You’re welcome.

When Castiel first found himself to be a human, things were OK. But too soon, Castiel seemed to lose his interest in things. He stayed quietly in his room in the bunker and mostly stopped doing the human things he’d just picked up on, like eating, showering, and not wearing the same clothes every day.

Castiel had been under the weather for almost two weeks now. Dean couldn’t take it. Since Castiel was human, he wanted him to experience all the fun stuff. Food, beer, but mostly food. He wanted to take him to his favourite burger places, and he had even planned a road trip for the best pie in each State.

But Castiel wasn’t feeling it. He was sleeping all the time and his energy was all the way down. Dean had bunker fever – he wouldn’t dare leave on a hunt with Castiel like this at home – and he felt powerless. He had started to drink pretty early after breakfast now.

Sam couldn’t take the whole scene anymore so he’d gone to help some hunters with a vampire nest. Dean was drinking alone in the kitchen, starting to feel depressed himself. He hated it.

Castiel showed up around 11 a.m., a robe thrown over his sleeping apparel, which was boxers and an old zep t-shirt of Dean’s. Castiel’s hair was intensely ruffled and flattened in places, his eyes were more sunken than Dean remembered, and his beard was 4 days old. In spite of all that, Dean thought he was a sight. He wished he could make him feel the way he felt about him.

“Dude, you need coffee. I’m gonna make you some coffee.” Castiel sat at the table. “Thanks.” He saw the beer. “What time is it?” Dean answered while measuring grounds. “11. Why?” “Nothing. I thought it was later, because of the beer.” Dean stopped mid-air with the spoon. He closed his eyes. “Dean, it’s not your fault I’m like this.” Dean finished preparing the coffee. “Yeah but it seems there’s nothing I can do to help.” “Dean, the contrast between the amount of energy with my grace and the amount of energy in a human body is too immense. I’ll be fine. I just need to adapt.” Dean took a mug from the shelf. “You need to let me help you, that’s what. Man, please let me help you.” Castiel looked Dean in the eye. Dean’s knees went a bit weak from the intensity of the blue in Castiel’s eyes. That never changed. Cas is still Cas. “Alright, Dean. I’ll let you.” Dean flashed a big smile. Castiel smiled softly.

He brought Castiel his coffee. “I know what I’m gonna do.” Castiel took a cautious sip. “Yes?” Dean downed the rest of his beer before answering, “I’m gonna bake you a cake.” “A cake.” “Yes! Not any cake. An angel food cake.” He wiggled his eyebrows, grinning like a kid at his fantastic idea. Castiel squinted. “That is very bizarre. Angels don’t eat.” Dean’s heart swelled each time Castiel made that kind of matter-of-factly beside the point comment. He crossed the kitchen in three paces, took Castiel’s face in his hands and gave him a big kiss on the forehead. “Man, I love you so much.” Castiel still squinted. “I love you too, but you don’t make sense.” “Dude! That cake is so light, fluffy and good, you’ll feel like an angel again. That’s how good it is. Get it?” He wiggled his eyebrows again. Castiel’s expression softened. “I highly doubt it, knowing exactly what it feels like to be an angel.” He saw Dean pout. “But OK. I’m willing to try it.” Dean pumped his fist in the air. “YES!” Castiel became serious again. “Dean, are you drunk?” Dean straightened up a bit too wobblily. “No. I’m cocktail.”

Castiel drank his coffee slowly while watching Dean open another beer – to celebrate – get the recipe on his phone and get the cake going. Soon enough, the cake was in the oven. “Are you done with your coffee, Cas? I’ll wash the mug with the rest.” Castiel brought his mug to Dean, who was already filling the sink. He hugged Dean from behind, his arms around him, his forehead on his shoulder. “Hey buddy, what’s up.” “I’m snoozy,” came the answer, muffled in Dean’s shoulder. “Come on, now. I wash, you dry.” “Mh.” Castiel reluctantly let go of Dean – which earned him a fluttery kiss on the cheek – and dried the dishes.

After they were done, Castiel took a peek in the oven. “Looks good.” Dean joined him. “No it doesn’t. Why doesn’t it rise? Dammit. I fudged something.” Castiel rested his cheek on Dean’s shoulder. I’m sure it’ll taste good anyway.” Dean shook his head. “I don’t care. It has to be fluffy. It’s part of the experience. No half-ass cake for my angel.” “Dean, I’m not…” Dean cut him. “Cas, you’ll always be my angel.” Castiel smiled softly against Dean’s shoulder.

Dean threw everything out and Castiel made him promise to sober up before going out for more eggs and other ingredients, which happened later that afternoon. Castiel threw some clothes on and went with him, but wanted to stay in the car. “Man, I don’t care that you look like a hurricane. Come in with me.” “I don’t care either. It’s just going to be faster if I stay here and keep an eye on Baby.” “Nonsense. Come on! You love grocery stores. You’re always fascinated by something.” Castiel thought about it a few seconds. “It’s true. OK. I’ll go with you.”

Attempt #2 was right after dinner. Castiel wasn’t hungry, so he barely touched his plate. Dean got busy – again, with a celebratory beer – baking the cake. Castiel watched closely, trying to follow the recipe. Dean put the timer and they set out some board game to pass the time. They were almost through the cooking time that Castiel said, “Smells like burning.” Dean hurried to the oven. “SHIT.” He quickly turned the oven off, opened the door and tried to vent the smoke. “The hell I did now?” Everything went into the trash again. Dean switched to whiskey.

The morning after, Castiel got to the kitchen a little before 10 a.m. His eyes were better than yesterday but the rest was still a mess. The beard was growing in nicely. Dean welcomed him with a smile and a coffee mug. “Hello sunshine!” He kissed Castiel on the top of his cheek, close to his eye. “Here’s your coffee.” “Thank you Dean.” Castiel sat with his coffee and eyed Dean’s glass in his hand. “That’s not coffee.” Dean smiled. “Nope. I’m changing the parameters. Beer is good for making burgers. Whiskey is better for baking.” Castiel couldn’t help but smile. “I hope it helps.” “This will also help,” Dean said, as he handed his phone to Castiel. “Here, read the recipe out loud to me. Maybe it’ll stick better if I hear it in your voice.” Castiel shook his head, amused. “You’re a strange man, Dean.” Dean winked at Castiel. “Hey. There has to be something to balance out against all the handsome.” Castiel laughed. “OK. Here’s the recipe.”

The third attempt went well and Dean stood proud looking at his cake cooling on the rack. “You’re sure the cake stays in the pan? Read again, Cas.” Castiel checked the phone. “Yes. And it says 3 hours to cool.” Dean took a swig from his whiskey. “That means we have plenty of time to get you looking decent.” Castiel squinted. “Decent?” “Man, I haven’t kissed you properly in days because you stink and you haven’t brushed your teeth. You need serious grooming. And you can’t have angel food cake if you don’t at least look the part.” Castiel seemed surprised. Dean added, “Come on, man. I worked super hard on this. Let’s get you decent.” Castiel seemed to search Dean’s eyes. “I think you’re looking for an excuse to come in the shower with me.” Dean flashed a soft smile. “You bet I do.” “You’ve already shown me how to shower, Dean.” “That’s not what I mean,” Dean answered, as he coaxed a perplex Castiel to the bathroom.

Dean had Castiel brush his teeth first. Then, Castiel and Dean stripped and stepped into the shower. Dean was easily overwhelmed by the soft, sad, tired eyes of Castiel. He kissed his lips softly. “Let’s get you clean, man.” “I know how to do it, Dean.” Dean stroke Castiel’s jaw with his thumb. “Then show me. Lather me.” Castiel, much to Dean’s not-surprise, went pretty methodically. He lathered Dean up with the soap and his hands, and then put him under the shower head and made sure it was all rinsed out. “And my hair?” Castiel shampooed and rinsed Dean’s hair. Dean chuckled. “Good execution. Congrats.” “I’m glad my method is appropriate.” Dean full-on laughed. “Appropriate is the right word, alright!” He took the soap in his hand. “Now, this is another way to do it.”

Dean lathered up his hands real good, all the while holding Castiel’s gaze. He got closer and lathered him slowly, softly, with his hands. It was not particularly sexual, but all his fondness for Castiel went into his movements, conveying how he cared about him. He rinsed him out and kissed his shoulders, and reached for the shampoo. He took his time to massage Castiel’s scalp, with his fingertips and his full hands, again showing his ever-angel he’s cared for. Castiel closed his eyes and put his hands on Dean’s waist. “This is so relaxing…” “So you like it.” “I might get used to that.” Dean smiled a kiss against Castiel’s cheek and rinsed him out.

Dressed in boxers, both men stood in front of the bathroom mirror. “Do you want to keep the beard?” “Do you like it?” Dean smiled. “Cas, you’re handsome as hell either way. So it’s your call. If you want to keep it, we can trim it a bit, so it looks clean and sharp.” Castiel scratched his beard and grimaced a bit. “I think I want it off. I’ll feel more like myself I think.” Dean gave Castiel the clipper and the razor, and Castiel proceeded and cleaned up.

Castiel finished toweling off his face and looked at Dean in the mirror. “Better?” Dean looked in Castiel’s eyes. “Do you feel better?” “Yes.” “Then yes, it’s better.” Dean hugged Castiel from behind, his arms wrapped around him, his chin rested on his shoulder, his eyes closed. He squeezed Castiel a little. Castiel wrapped his arms over Dean’s and rested his cheek on Dean’s head. “You worry about me.” For only answer, Dean squeezed him again a little. “I’m sorry to cause you such worry, Dean.” “It’s alright Cas, as long as you don’t shut me out. Just let me help.” Castiel gave Dean’s embrace a squeeze as well. “OK. I promise.” Dean let go, planted a quick kiss on Castiel’s neck and declared, “OK, now, we can’t spend the rest of the day in boxers, so let’s get dressed.”

The showers didn’t take 3 hours so there was still time to spare. Dean couldn’t take his hands off his human angel, giving him a squeeze here, a pat there, and it seemed to work. Castiel was smiling more, and he was starting to hug Dean back and give him little kisses. Dean beamed each time. He even managed to get Castiel to pin him against the wall and kiss him breathless.

They decided to go out for a late lunch and stopped to eat it by the river. They then sat on a big rock and watched the stream. Castiel saw a fish. Dean wrapped himself around Castiel, who gave him little kisses. Dean looked at his watch. “We have a good half hour of sitting here and look for fish before heading back. Is that good with you?” Castiel tucked his nose under Dean’s jaw line. “Yes, Dean.”

Back at the bunker, Dean and Castiel saw Sam was back, his car being parked outside. Dean got in the kitchen first. “Hey Sammy! How were the vamps?” “Heads rolled.” Sam pointed to the upside-down cake pan on the cooling tray. “Who’s baking?” Dean answered as he reached for a knife and plates. “Me! It’s angel food cake. Get it?” He wiggled his eyebrows at Sam. Sam shook his head. “So that’s what you do when I’m out doing our job? You play in the kitchen?” Dean repeated, annoyed, “Angel food cake! Get it??” Sam got it, but was not going to give Dean the satisfaction. He turned to Castiel. “What’s his prob – whoa. You look better, man. What happened?” “Dean happened. He asked me to let him take care of me and I accepted his offer.” “Seems to be working.” Dean chimed in, “Yeah. And now, we’re having angel food cake.” Sam finally smiled. “Alright, alright. I’ll go put this away – he shouldered his bag – and I’ll be right with you.”

Dean gave everyone a big piece of cake with whipped cream and berries. Sam was impressed. Castiel didn’t know he was supposed to be impressed, but since he witnessed the failed attempts, he had a feeling success was not easy with this cake. He took a bite, under Dean’s watchful eye. Castiel’s eyes widened and he turned to Dean, chewing. He started to say something with his mouth full when suddenly he just shut his eyes and kept chewing slowly. He licked his lips. Finally, he opened his eyes and turned to Dean. “This. This is the best cake. Granted, I haven’t had other cakes, but I’m sure this is the best cake in the whole world.” He took another bite. “Mmm…” Sam had an amused smile. “If you two need to be alone…” Dean turned to Sam. “Me and Cas or Cas and the cake?” Sam forked a piece of cake. “Moron.”

After cleaning up, Castiel announced he needed a nap, probably because he’d had too much cake. When he said that, he’d given Dean’s thigh a little squeeze under the table. Dean announced he needed a nap too. Before Sam could even roll his eyes, he was up and following Castiel to his room. As Dean closed the door behind them, he heard Sam shouting, the voice clearly coming from the fridge: “What the hell are we going to do with 3 dozens of egg yolks? DEAN!!!”

I’d love to hear from you!

Back to the Masterlist

The prompt itself. So I wrote this and my day was gone lol I know, it’s not drawing, and Dean isn’t super drunk either. But hey, a prompt’s a prompt and what happens happens. :)

#destiel #destiel fanfic #destiel fluff #destiel domestic fluff #destiel tooth-rotting fluff #angel cake #angel food cake

91 notes · View notes