seeking your higher self in 2024
hello, angels ⭑.ᐟ today we'll be taking the first step to our personal journey to be our higher self and achieve our dream life. an important reminder is that it is never too late to change and to allow yourself to be. if you are reading this and you feel like it is too late or that you're so far behind everyone else, or thinking "can i even do it?", take a deep breath, because you can! if this is your case, i highly recommend watching this incredible bevy smith ted talk, which is a major inspiration for this post.
i talk (or rather write) a lot, just so you know.
it is what you make it
you need to understand your power. life is all about perspective, about what you put into the world and what you'll receive in exchange. as much as i believe the "it is what it is" mindset is important so you can come to terms with your own reality (there's no moving forward if you can't accept where you are), this is just as important. this is my own interpretation of this mindset, but i'd love to hear yours as well!
many things in life are out of control, but some—and a lot of them—you can control. you can choose your own mindset and the energy and intention you're letting out to the world, as well as how you think about yourself and whether or not you believe you're worthy of good things. trust me, you can't move forward and achieve your higher self if you don't believe you're worth it! you need to work on your self-concept in order to be yourself, because otherwise being yourself means being worthless, or whatever it is you repeat to yourself.
you are in control of your life.
i'm not talking about specific situations that unfortunately you can't control, and i'm also not saying you deserve what you're getting, because no! no one deserves bad things happening to them, but unfortunately they do happen regardless of what we think or believe in—even people who you believe have the perfect life have to go through rough times.
still, in the end, you need to take charge. you might not be responsible for what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it. it won't be necessarily easy or comfortable, but it needs to be done. even a small step can make the difference as long as you're moving forward.
one thing you'll need to be working on for the entirety of this journey is your self-concept—there are a lot of things to talk about it, but for now focus on understanding how you view yourself. in order to do so, here are some prompts that can help you with it:
⭑ how do you currently perceive yourself?
⭑ what is one negative self-belied you hold? how can you challenge it?
⭑ when was a time you doubted yourself? why did that happen?
⭑ how is your self-talk and how does it impact you?
⭑ what is a part of yourself you're critical of? why?
⭑ what is a part of yourself you're proud of? why?
find your motivation
i'm currently in my early 20s, which is a strange period in life. of course i've also thought my teenage years were strange, but being in your 20s is different (maybe in ten years i'll say the same thing about being in my 30s). it's not all about comparing dating or being popular or getting the best grades or whatever, now the people i'm surrounded by are having jobs, or being the perfect university student, or living overseas to pursue their professional athlete career, or even doing scientific research with influential people! and they're all my age.
it's very intimidating to realize that age doesn't mean anything and that you can do anything regardless of being younger or older. but it's also reassuring, because it allowed me to understand that we all have our own pace—which means that you're not behind just because you think you are; in the end, your time will come. the time where you'll be satisfied, happy, and thrilled to live your life because it's finally what you wanted! but for that to happen, you have to do the work.
to start seeking your authentic self and live as your higher self, you need to do the work. the first thing is looking inside and realizing your reasons.
of course being authentic itself is a motivation, because who wants to live in the shade of how other people want you to be? putting on a mask everyday is exhausting and you can't live like that.
but this is not easy. it is an uncomfortable, hard, and hurting journey, but it leads you to healing, to real happiness. this is exactly why you need to have your motives, because you need a strong foundation so you won't give up. i say this because i have given up a few times, which is exactly why i might have started this journey at the age of nineteen, but i only properly started it this year, at the age of twenty-one—two years after i convinced myself i'd do it.
here is a journal prompt that might help you get to the source of your motivation:
⭑ what are your core reasons for wanting to change?
list your emotional, personal, or practical reasons for pursuing this journey. anything can be a motive, really. maybe you just don't resonate with your life, or you want to reinvent yourself. whatever it is, as long as it comes from a place of authenticity and truth, it will help you during this journey. embrace whatever it is that's motivating you and allow it to guide you to a life that resonate with your true self! the path may be challenging, but it's always worth it.
after thinking about why you want to change, work on these prompts to understand exactly what you want to change:
⭑ if you could see your life in five years, where do you want to be?
⭑ what do you look forward to most in the future?
⭑ what area of your life do you want to improve the most? list five things you can do in order to achieve that
⭑ make a list of how your life would be if you could be and do anything in the world
being authentic
a great part of becoming your higher self means understand your authentic self. now, what does it truly mean to be authentic? of course we all know the definition: being true to yourself, to your values, and to your beliefs, even when others may disagree. but let's take one step further and ask yourself: what makes you you?
i wouldn't be surprised if many of you came up to me and said that you actually don't know the answer to that question. most of us have become used to suppressing your true selves and the best parts of who we are so we can fit in other people's expectations. but it's not okay to make yourself smaller just so someone else can feel better. if you recognize someone in your life who falls into this category, it's time to walk away! trust me, you'll be better off without that kind of energy surrounding you. instead, focus on people who uplift and inspire you to be authentic.
being yourself is a blessing, and for this i'll be quoting shakespeare: “to thine own self be true”. this means not worrying about pleasing other people and remaining true to who you are—therefore, being authentic, which is the ultimate goal. as bevy smith so beautifully said in her ted talk, “nobody can be you but you, so you might as well show up and show out”. make the most of your individuality and celebrate it!
⭑ is there a difference between how you act in public and how you act when you're alone? if yes, why do you think so and do you believe one act is more authentic than the other?
⭑ if you could be like anyone in the world, who would it be and why?
⭑ if you fully believed you're worthy and enough as you are, how would you be/act?
get to know who you are
knowing yourself is a lifelong journey because we're constantly changing and evolving, and you can't truly be you if you don't know yourself—quite obvious, right? yet, for so many people (and trust me, i've been there before), this isn't easy.
often, it's because they don't actively spend time with themselves, which may sound ridiculous at first, because logically we're always with ourselves, but simply existing isn't enough to know yourself. to truly understand who you really are, you need to engage in self-reflection, which is why i've been leaving journal prompts for each section of this post—that's truly one of the best tools to connect with yourself.
with that being said, you need to take some personal time for and with yourself. some people struggle to even say their favorite movie, or their favorite color, or something as basic as their favorite food or drink. the truth is, if you don't know the basics, knowing your deeper complexities, which is vital to understand who you are, will become challenging. so, take the time to ask yourself some questions! reflect on the things you might easily know about your close friends or family but might not be able to answer if they ask you.
⭑ every day before you sleep, make a list of ten things you like. it can be a movie, a color, a piece of clothing, or products. anything
⭑ if you could describe yourself in three words, what words would you choose?
⭑ describe two significant events in your life you believe have shaped you into who you are today
⭑ what are your beliefs and your personal values? list at least five
putting yourself out there
another important aspect of knowing yourself includes putting yourself out there. as someone who has struggled with social anxiety for a long time—and still does—i can tell you this: letting your fears control you won't do you any good. stepping outside your comfort zone is essential for growth, even if it means taking a small step—after all small steps will still lead you to where you want to be, as long you're moving forward.
make an effort to go out. you'll learn a lot about yourself by visiting a new park or attending an event you've never attended before. if you have the means, consider traveling as well! the key is getting to a fresh environment where you won't have to mold yourself into whatever labels people have put on you. you can also start a new activity, such as taking a poetry class, exploring a new sport, or joining a club. each experience is an opportunity for self-discovery.
even if you struggle with social interactions, which i totally understand, meeting new people is also a very interesting way to learn more about yourself. it means you'll be exposed to different perspectives, which can reveal things you've never realized before.
you might meet someone with views so different from yours that you can't help but wish you never fall into that mindset, but you can also meet someone whose perspective resonates with you, and you'll discover qualities you aspire to embody. each interaction offers you a chance for growth and a deeper self-understanding, which is, again, essential!
this doesn't mean you have to mold yourself to be like that person—by all means, don't! you don't have to be exactly like someone else in order to achieve your dream life. however, you're allowed to be inspired by them. most of our beliefs and values come from experiences we've had with other people—it can be something as simple as believing that family comes first. you can learn a lot about your own values and who you are deep down by interacting with other people.
⭑ what three things you admire in your loved ones?
⭑ how have your friends impact your beliefs?
⭑ what beliefs do you share with your loved ones?
take a note, give a note
as i mentioned earlier, many people who are my age are making extraordinary accomplishments—including friends of mine—and it has brought out a lot of different feelings within me. insecurity was one of them, because i often questioned to myself: if people my age are able to do all of these amazing things, why am i not doing it? what's preventing me from being as accomplished as they are?
the truth is, we don't have to be like everyone else. i've said this before, but it's important to understand that having different trajectories in life is included in not being like everyone else. just because someone your age is achieving a certain goal doesn't mean you should be doing the same thing—maybe that's not even what you want. understand and accept that you have your own path.
for example, i have no interest in being an athlete or to engage in as many academic activities as some of them are. and even if i did want those things, it's important to remember that what's meant for me will come in due time; maybe this just isn't the moment yet. this doesn't mean that i'm behind, it simply means i have my own pace. i'll continue to work towards my goals, because giving up and letting the universe do absolutely everything is not something i believe in, but i don't have to exhaust myself just because i'm not achieving everything i want right now.
now, with all that being said, implement a new ritual in your life. understand that each person has its own journey to fulfill and that everything you want and are meant to have will come in due time doesn't mean that you'll get over it easily. i understand that it can be hard—which is why we seriously need to work on our issues with believing everything has to happen in this exact moment.
the take a note, give a note ritual is supposed to help you with it, and i believe is a simple and effective way to do so.
the premise of it is: when you see someone having what you want, or what you think you want, instead of letting feelings of envy or jealousy take control, take charge of those feelings instead. ask yourself: is this what i really want? do i actually want what to be where that person is? regardless of the answer, as long as you're honest and true to your feelings, tell yourself this: “their wins have nothing to do with my worthiness.”
then, give a note. the note is nothing more than a sincere "congratulations". you can comment on their post, message them, or even call them, just don't let your previous envy and jealousy take control. allow yourself to be genuinely happy for others without having to diminish their achievements. as bevy smith said in her ted talk, “when you remove malice from your heart, not only do you feel better, you look better.”
don't punish yourself if it doesn't come naturally to you. unfortunately, believe it or not, it does happen to some people, especially those who were raised in an environment filled with negativity and competitiveness. instead, adopt new habits in your daily life to get rid of it, such as focusing on the good aspects of your life and what you're grateful for (i highly suggest doing a list of things you're grateful for each day before sleeping), practice mindfulness, and go to therapy or talk to someone about it.
⭑ how do you handle envy/jealousy?
⭑ what are three self-defeating thoughts that show up whenever you feel envy/jealousy?
⭑ how can you overcome negative thoughts when you feel envy/jealousy?
⭑ remember a recent time when you felt envy/jealous of someone and why. how did you handle it? what did you do to overcome that feeling?
thank you so much for reading, and i wish you good luck and a great life! i talk a lot, but i find each of these topics very important. if you want to talk, send me an ask or message me if you can.
xoxo, lia ✮
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Reading SVSSS: Chapter 15
For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!
If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.
Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.
It's chapter 15! Time to figure out what happened to SQQ in the latest cliff hangar.
Today no tea- but I did have a blackberry cider that was very tasty.
I also did impulse buy a baby's-first-fountain pen to get into my little writing flow and add to the ambiance of my note taking journey. So, pls ignore the worse-than-usual writing; I am learning to write with it.
let's goooooo!
Well, SQQ appears to be in a coffin? p29
fuck, i'm already smudging the ink with my new pen. The lefty curse of it all. IDK how much of this is going to be legible later. RIP
okay... but how long has he been in here? MXTX is describing everything as dusty as hell. p30 (resolved as I read further- not very long LOL)
and he has his original body! That's exciting! Who did it though?? p30
LOL SQQ has 0 chance with this "advanced level plot" p31. He is totally fucked for sure.
These 'blind corpses' sound like a walking horror show. I would be so scared omg. I don't know how far the animated series got- but if this is animated that would look cool as fuck. p32
okay! they're fueled by breath! that's really neat though! pp33-34 Scary, but cool.
I would die immediately in this situation. When the thing (blind corpses) that are already horrible and unbeatable are scared of something else -> absolutely no hope in surviving. p35
ah, it is our little snake-man. I had a suspicion this was related to him and Luo Binghe's dad. He probably took SQQ's corpse too and brought it here. p35
OMG LOL Luo Binghe's dad is awful, but also feels like a troll AND is serving dad jokes. Re: thinking back to when SQQ knocked on the coffin and he answered from inside LOOOL. p36
Listen. Can we just take a moment to appreciate the absolute DILF that is Luo Binghe's father? I am a whole lesbian but that character art cannot objectively argued as anything else. p37
and now SQQ is going on about Tianlang-jun having BDE (not those exact words but I mean when you say he's working that coffin like it's a Paris fashion week runway and Luo binghe - the man you are obsessed with- could NEVER, it says something.). p38
That fucking power move too! SQQ: seems you've waited a while to meet me, why don't you come out of there and do so. Tianlang-jun: *bats eyes* okay but only if you hold my hand and work for it p39
SQQ has this habit of getting kidnapped "for his own good" but no one ever tells him why it's good for him XD this entire situation is so annoying. Tianlang-jun did this all so that he could get him away from the sects he wanted to destroy. p43
OMG scratch that. He also wants to use him as bait to snatch his sons body as his own. p45.
aside: I'm going to have to organize these notes later- I'm not catching the nuance in the hand written notes LOL my brain is processing faster than my hand (you will notice that the last 2 points here do not match my hand written notes because they were a hot mess).
What an entrance Luo Binghe! p47
Yes SQQ! You rescue your man from his dad (RE: holding Zhuzhi lang hostage) p51
holy shit. Zhuzhi lang is WILD - he really was about to just die instead of be a hostage LOL p52 I want to know what his character motivation is. He's giving the same blind trust energy as The Core Melting Hand in MDZS. Both just so loyal to a fault/their own demise. Do we learn more? or is this it? (genuine question- don't tell me WHAT we learn, just yes/no if we learn more).
That was so smart to hit the anti-theft measures in the tomb p53
aaaaaaaand he snatched the wrong person on the escape. well, that's fantastic. p54
I am loving the traps in this mausoleum though! The face with the magma and then the various rooms. I want to know if this exists as a D&D dungeon crawl/anyone has made one, I think it would be so fun. p59
omg. I don't think that Luo Binghe realizes/knows that that was his own father and cousin. that's so terrible. Truly Luo Binghe was treated so fucking badly literally his entire life. His dad does not even give a shit. Honestly probably only had him for this situation - needing a new body. p61
:((((( Our boy, Luo Binghe is in a bad way rn. gah! so many cliff hangers. p63
MXTX Cliffhangar Lord
And now I have to wait until tomorrow to see if baby Luo Binghe makes it. I'm sure SQQ is going to do something about it but dang, he is not well.
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