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dodo-begone · 4 years

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Ugly Fuckling

Pairing: Yandere!Xisuma x Reader

Request: mmm for requests: some soft yandere shit with any character, maybe??

Word count: 3.9K

Warning: yandere, cursing, depression (?), Anxiety (?), angst (to comfort), dissociation

Part 2 for this is Now Listen Here Sad Bitches - Stop Being Sad

If this EVER looks funky/glitched (which it def is now) I have this up properly on Ao3.

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The shopping district made you uneasy. Life just seemed to course through the area. Even without anyone actually being there to give it the energy. It was cramped though; everything was practically on top of each other. Yet it gave such a homey feeling. Like everybody who made the buildings actually liked each other; they all were a representation of how everyone was different but still similar to a family. Standing in front of all of the shops made you feel intimidated. Small, insignificant, inadequate.

You start your journey through the district, looking and giving every build the attention it deserved. It was all in an attempt to imbed everything into your memory. After all, you wouldn’t be around for much longer. Someone like you, who was so alien to the server, shouldn’t just try and worm their way into such an amazing community like this. Especially when they have nothing to offer for said community.

You hadn’t realized where you were walking until you stood in front of Grian’s barge. It was so gorgeous and well made. Grian told you how it began as a small little boat build and progressively grew to the giant floating market it is today. The story was awe inspiring; like an ugly duckling, it grew into something majestic after starting at such humble beginnings. Yet it did little to lift your spirits now. Yeah the barge started as a simple build, but it was still beautiful in its tiny state. And Grian had the talent and skill to make ginormous and intricate builds. You had neither of those abilities.

Slowly you made your way closer to the barge. At the entrance there were numerous posters all bunched together on a post. All for the mayoral campaign. They were so cute, each having a unique look. Representing their mayors very well. But Scar’s. Oh Scar’s was just elite. It was a plain wooden sign; a small but even more unique technique when compared to the others. Nothing beat some good ole fashioned petitioning. You let out a small giggle at the sight of Scar’s sign next to the others. It seemed very out of place. Seemed like a solid representation of you with the hermits. And at the same time it reminded you so much of the Dream smp.

The Dream smp… your old home. Calling the dream smp home feels wrong; you barely felt safe there, but you knew that you were wanted there. Even if just a few actually cared about you, loved you. You fit in so much better there. Your horrendous builds could easily blend in with the others or better yet, stand out amongst the surrounding disasters to look semi-decent. Yes there were actual beautiful builds, just like any other server, but they were few and far between. Those builds were under constant threat of being griefed or destroyed, just like all of the others. Yet everybody seemed mostly okay with it. They would be upset when it would be destroyed, like any normal person would. But they only had two options when presented with the rubble; pick up the fragments and rebuild from the ground up or forever abandon what was once a masterpiece.

With the hermits, there was order there. The chaos was controlled, which was an odd concept to you. Chaos on the Dream smp ran rampant, destroying anything in its path. And there even seemed to be a “type” of person that was deemed a “hermit”. Thought it was hard to pick out something that everybody had in common. But you knew one thing; you didn’t fit the description of a hermit.

On the Dream smp, everything was always on the brink of destruction and very tense. Things could change on the flip of a dime. Nothing was guaranteed. And yet you still wanted to go back there. To feel wanted, important, enough, to be validated. To be so much more than you were with the hermits. With the hermits, you were only an imposter; everything they said to or about you was a lie. Had to be a lie. Why else would you be like this super kinda and incredible person? The person they were describing wasn't even you. It was a whole different person, how could they not see that?!

Leaning against the outerwall of the barge, you slowly slide to the ground. You start a panoramic view from your new position. It only made you feel worse; you felt detached from your body. Like you were watching a movie of you and your life from an outsider’s view. But you had control of your body and could still kinda see through your eyes, which made it feel even weirder. So more like you were walking through a movie that you weren’t made for; a real person wandering the domain of a cartoon show.

A shaky breath breaks it way through your lips. Trails of tears soon start to trickle down your face, slightly obscuring the view you had. Suddenly the world becomes too big yet too small. Much duller, less important. Everything became too much yet not enough all at the same time. Soon the feeling overwhelmed you so much that you broke down into a sobbing mess. The wanted to hide your face in your hands and knees hung over you like a tsunami wave, but you knew you shouldn’t. These were your last moments and views of the hermitcraft server. Even if you couldn’t see clearly anymore. Any view was better than no view. You tried to muffle your cries; do anything to stay silent and unseen. Nobody really wanted to deal with a crying person. They just felt obligated to.

God you were such a burden on all of the hermits. You could barely support yourself with your shitty little farm. Barely any food was produced. And the hermits kept giving you stuff: ores, food, weapons, armour, just about anything you could think of. Golden carrots, golden apples, elytras, diamonds and netherite were the gifts that made you feel the worst. These were such wonderful, valuable, and useful items. Nobody would give them out for free, even to a friend. Especially as often as they did.

So you’d set out on a journey to figure out who’d gifted you stuff and return it immediately. First you just left them in a chest with a book or sign explaining that you didn’t want to accept their gift. It felt wrong that they were giving them such nice stuff. They’d always bring it back to you though. It burned your heart. Both from how sweet the gesture was and the physical pain you felt taking it from them. After a few cycles of this, people started to stop telling you who gave you that new item of yours. Even when you begged them for answers.

You had to turn to more drastic measures. Every gift you got was soon carefully investigated for any sign of who could’ve given it to you. There wasn't a way to easily get an answer from the other hermits. They had gotten suspicious of your past tactics, so you had to change your approach.

So you went with the closest guess. Even if they weren’t the one to give it to you, you’d give it to them. When the “gifter” left their base, you’d swiftly sneak in and start to put the items back in their storage. Many of them had chest monsters, so it was easier to put the items in their chests. After all, they wouldn’t really notice more items in the giant mess of items they already had. Then there were the ones with organized sorting systems. You’d search for their proper homes and place them in there. Since these people usually had big storage facilities, it wouldn't be hard to hide a few other items in there. What were the odds that they’d notice that they had a little more of an item than they last remember?

Aw who were you kidding, they’d obviously notice a whole inventory’s worth of golden carrots in their chests. But you deluded yourself into believing that your attempts worked. Believing a beautiful life was much easier and felt better than facing the less-than enjoyable truth.

When you finally calmed down enough, you went over your mental plan again. It had to be absolutely perfect. With no flaws or kinks. This couldn’t fail. Every attempt before had ended in fucking failure. You’d look so bad to the hermits if you failed in leaving again. Why did you still care about what they thought of you? That’s such a silly thing to still care about.

Each plan before had one step that’d always thwarted your leave; you always said goodbye to somebody. At first it started with a big group of hermits, but with each attempt the group got smaller and smaller.

When you’d go to say your goodbyes, the hermit you were talking to would get upset. They’d begged you to stay. Or they’d ask you to help them on this one last project. And then another hermit would ask, and then another. Until you were helping a hermit as soon as you finished a project. You were almost never alone for a while. Slowly the thought of leaving would be pushed further and further back into your mind. Until it was practically gone; only echoes of it would remain to haunt you at night. This was a continuous cycle, and you wanted it to end.

This time you weren’t going to get stopped. Having fewer people in the plan makes it easier to leave. That meant nobody was going to get an in-person goodbye. Everybody had an individual letter addressed to them from you and one for the entire server. It was better this way. They wouldn’t have the chance to stop you.

You don’t know how much time passed, nor did you really care. God you wanted to stay here so bad, yet you couldn’t. This wasn’t where you belonged. You weren’t meant to be here.

With a heavy sign, you hauled yourself off the ground and made your way to the edge of the server. Every moment was precious now, so you decided to dawdle as much as you could. Nobody was going to stop you, so you had time. After all, nobody was going to be finding the letters anytime soon.

To savor every last second on the server, you traversed by boat and foot. Yes you’d miss the elytras, but you wanted to travel the old fashioned way. The way you were used to doing it. Elytras weren’t on the Dream smp, so you needed to start getting used to not having them again.

It felt like seconds before you were at the edge. A few blinks and bam! You were at your final destination on the Hermitcraft server. It was now or never. All you had to do was take a few steps over and you would be back on the Dream smp. Yet your feet refused to move. Why weren’t they moving? This was for the greater good. Yes you wouldn’t be happy there immediately, but you’d grow used to it again.

You started to take deep breaths, trying to hype yourself up to take the final steps. It was like three steps, come on. You can do it. The trip here was longer and harder than this. Don’t let something this small ruins all the work you’ve done. God it was like you were like a walking failure. You couldn’t even finish something you started, something you wanted done. A small part of you whispered, begged you to say with the hermits. But it was soon covered by a much louder part of the mind, telling you that this was the best thing you could do for everyone. Come on, they wouldn’t miss you at all. With one final breath, you took a step forward.

“What’re you doing?” a voice seemed to yell. God it was so quiet. Why was it so quiet? Literally any noise was too loud now.

You stopped. Oh no, did you take too long getting here? Man you really should’ve used that elytra instead. Would’ve made this trip so much easier and faster.

Slowly you turn around to see who interrupted you. And low and behold, it’s Xisuma. He was a little ways away from you, which you were thankful for. It was surprising to see him so far away from the server though. Did he find the notes. Shit, fuck, no no no-. You really hope he hadn’t found them.

“I’m just looking around” a nervous shell of your voice answers. It sounded so empty, like the wind could easily blow it away with just a single gentle gust. You desperately look over where Xisuma’s face would be in hopes of finding out what he was feeling or thinking. That mask of his blocked it, so it was futile. But you had to know what he thought about you now. Was he disappointed? Did he hate you? Especially for how you tried to leave?

“This far out,” he spreads his arms out, gesturing to the world around y’all. It was practically deserted. There was only an island, and you two were standing on it. Ocean covered the world to the horizon. Logically you knew you had no reason to be out here other than to leave. You knew Xisuma knew as well. He had to. He was the admin, after all.

“Uh,” you frantically look around, hoping to find anything to help you get out of this tense situation. You hated this. Hated confrontation. This was a reason you left the Dream smp. “Yeah I wanted a good sight for the uh- for the sunset. Yes, the sunset! It’s so pretty when you’re so far from the mainland. Away from all the buildings that could obstruct the view.”

It took a second for your words to finally hit you, and when they did it felt like a slap to the face. “I’m not saying the builds are bad,” you desperately backpedal, trying to change the possible interpretation of your words. “I mean they’re very big. Big and pretty! Yes, very pretty! But they block the skyline so easily and the sunset and sunrise are just hidden by them. And sometimes the light pollution really gets in the way of stargazing- I’m rambling aren’t I? I’m sorry.”

You stared at Xisuma, wishing for him to give you any sign as to what he was thinking. But the black visor thwarted you attempts again; his face was unviewable with his helmet on.

Wait how could you have been so self absorbed to not notice what Xisuma is wearing. He adorned a little bee/wasp (you had a hard time telling the difference at the moment) themed outfit. It was like a whole bodysuit. And he had a little bee/wasp helmet too! Oh my gosh it was the little bee outfit he owned! The one you really liked! He was actually wearing it? The outfit you said looked really good on him? No, wait. He might just like it as well. That’s probably why he’s wearing it. Stupid, remember you’re not special. Especially to anyone. Why can’t you get that through your thick brain?

Xisuma must have seen the emotional trip you just went on. It must’ve been obvious, right? Written all over your face?

“You’re not wrong,” Xisuma starts. “The builds can be rather disruptive of a good view of the sunset or sunrise. But if you wanted a good viewing spot, you could’ve just asked me. I wouldn’t have minded showing you one.”

“That would’ve been such a stupid thing to ask,” you sniffle, barely having the strength to look him in the eyes. Well, where his eyes should be. “Going up to an admin and saying ‘I can’t see the sunrise or sunset well. Can you show me a good viewing spot’ isn’t exactly something you ask an admin. Usually it’s something along the lines of ‘hey this player took my stuff’ or ‘I’m stuck in a hole and need help.’”

Silence smothers the two of you. Your words were heavy. Made your mouth dry too. Wow is it hot out or just you? It’s really fucking hot out here.

“Again,” Xisuma breaks the silence,” I wouldn’t have minded at all. I’m here for you. For the hermits. And I’m here to help. Why do you think my help wouldn’t extend to you?”

You ponder over his question. Now that he states it like that, how can you just make up a stupid excuse? The care he showed in his explanation made you feel warm and fuzzy. Even if it wasn’t a lot. It made you feel special. Just for that moment. He doesn’t deserve a sucky lie. He deserved the truth. You owed it to him. Then you’ll stop being a bother to him and leave. Right… leave.

“Because I’m not a hermit, Xisuma,” you murmur, hugging yourself for comfort. “I don’t think I ever was. Or ever will be, for that matter.”

“And why not,” Xisuma prods, taking a step towards you. “You are a hermit. You’re on the hermit server and you have been for quite a while now. Everyone loves you. They love you so much. I love you so much.”

That question hurts you. It hurts you so much and yet you have no reason for it to hurt you this much. The statement was false and you knew it. So it shouldn’t hold this much power over you. He’s wrong and you know it. But how do you break it to him?

Yeah, break the news to him. The only thing breaking is you. Xisuma’s mask, which you had once adored, scared you. Intimidated you and made you feel inadequate. The more you looked, the worse you felt.

And so you give in. “Because I’m not one of you. I’d never be one of you. No matter what I did, it’d never amount to what everyone else can do! Grian can make magnificent builds, Scar can landscape like a god, and Mumbo can make literally anything and everything out of redstone. Everybody has something that they’re good at, something they specialize in. And me,” your voice cracks. You drop to the ground on your knees, curling into yourself. “I can’t do anything. I can’t build, can’t farm and I can’t even do simple redstone. I’m a literal dunce. I’ll never be able to do anything right. I’ll never be enough, especially on a server like this with so many incredible people like you. And everyone is so nice. I don’t deserve this kindness. I’m a horrible person. And-and I just don’t belong here. It’d be better if a burden like me is gone, out of your hair. It’d be better if I went back to the Dream smp. Where I can’t be a burden to anybody here.” You finally break down. Sobs shook your body and any words that came out after that were unintelligible.

Suddenly there’s a presence near you, giving you a hug. You flinch, but know it’s Xisuma. Who else could it be? He was the only one here with you. He lets go of you slowly, but you quickly latch onto him and hide in the crook of his neck. You really wanted some comfort. You wanted Xisuma’s hugs. You didn’t want to be left alone.

He goes back to gently holding you, quietly telling you that everything was going to be okay. And other things. Everything just went in one ear and out the other. But he’s giving you soft and steady backrubs. You snuggle closer to him. God this was like a whole comfort package! It just made you want to cry harder. And he just stays there! Letting you cry on him. He’s so nice to little ole you.

Soon you tuckered yourself out from crying. You’re so tired, but you’re still crying. Sadness just courses through you. But you’re so tired. Slowly your sobs turn to sniffle and you try to bring him even closer to you.

“Feel any better,” he tries his best to look at you after your sniffles are all that’re coming out of you. It’s really hard to look at someone so close to you.

You nod against him, too tired to answer verbally. Plus your voice probably sounds terrible and wouldn’t be able to handle answering anyways.

He picks you up, holding you close to him and walks away from the border. You’re so thankful that Xisuma is carrying you. It makes you feel so loved. And your body was so weak after your breakdown.

Soon you two are on a boat, heading back to the rest of the hermits. He’s rowing y’all home. You cuddle into him, wanting as much physical contact as you can get. You’re so tired, but you don’t want to sleep just yet. But you still doze off anyways. As you do though, Xisuma starts to talk to you.

“Thank you for staying with us. With me. I really appreciate that. I love you, remember that. I’ll tell you that a million times if I have to. I’d tell you daily, hourly. Whatever you want. Just don’t leave, please. I love you so much. It’d hurt if you left. If I lost you. But it also hurts to see you in so much pain. Oh I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you sooner. I should've seen the signs. But I’m here. I’ll help you. I love you so much. I’ll stay with you as long as you’re with me. I’d follow you to the end and back.”

You can’t exactly hear what he’s saying, but it must be really nice. The tone of it is so comforting. Wait hold up. Weren’t you doing something. Struggling to stay awake, you mind scrambles for an answer. The border. Yes, the border! You were there. But for what? You couldn’t remember anymore. But was it important if you forgot? Oh who cares, you got Xisuma with you! You were home! That’s all that mattered.

As you finally start to drift off, you mutter an ‘i love you’ to him, finally falling into a well deserved slumber.

#tw: yandere #dodo writing #mcyt x reader #tw: cursing #tw: depression #tw: anxiety #tw: dissociation #tw: angst #hermitcraft x reader #xisuma x reader #yandere #yandere xisuma #c: xisuma #hermitship

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zippityzap · 3 years

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Sonic Tarot Card Project: explanations for character picks

Recently I completed a summer-long project where I created Sonic themed versions of the tarot major acana. I put a lot of research and thought into what characters to assign to which cards, and I wanted to explain my rationale behind each one! (Everything’s under the read more cut because this is a very long post!)

To start off, let me explain why I did this project in the first place. This summer I watched Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure for the first time, and in Part 3, Stardust Crusaders, the majority of the stand abilities are named after the tarot major arcana. Thanks to cultural osmosis I vaguely knew the meanings of a few of the cards and I realised that one of the characters suited his assigned card pretty well. I was curious if this matched anyone else and so once I finished watching that part, I did research on tarot and found that yeah, a lot of them do match! That got me interested in tarot and since I like combining things I’m interested in, I decided to make Sonic versions of the cards.

I do want to note that while Jojo did inspire this project in a lot of ways, I tried not to let my character picks be influenced by Stardust Crusader characters, although there did end up being some picks that did coincidentally happen to match nicely anyway. Also, I’m not gonna lie, ever since picking these card choices I’ve been highly tempted to draw Sonic as Polnareff.

Anyway, on to my explanations for character choices!

0: The Fool (Charmy Bee)

The Fool represents innocence, spontaneity and recklessness. I believe Charmy’s happy and carefree nature, along with the simple fact that he’s essentially just a little kid who likes to have fun makes him a great fit for this card

1: The Magician (Infinite)

The Magician represents creation and strength, but also manipulation and narcissism, a good match for Infinite and the powers of the phantom ruby. (I was also very pleased to notice that the traditional art for the card has an infinity symbol- everything lined up very well!)

The Rider Waite version of the card also depicts a sword, a wand, a cup and a pentacle; the suits of the minor arcana. I have attempted to depict these with various objects from the Sonic series, namely Infinite’s sword from the IDW Forces prequel comic, the sceptre of darkness from '06, a chaos emerald, and a ring respectively.

2: The High Priestess (Princess Elise)

The High Priestess represents secrets, repression, and the unknown, which I believe fits with Elise’s initial desire to control her emotions and her sadness. (Admittedly this is one of the looser character/card connections for this project, but my two other picks for this card I felt were better suited to different cards)

3: The Empress (Vanilla the Rabbit)

The Empress represents nurturing, fertility and childbirth, all traits that I believe make this card a good pick for a kind, caring mother like Vanilla

4: The Emperor (Dr Eggman)

A card fitting for the leader of the Eggman Empire! The Emperor represents authority, power, and tyranny, all traits Dr Robotnik desires, if not possesses in many continuities.

5: The Hierophant (Espio the Chameleon)

The Hierophant represents wisdom and tradition, and in both upright and reversed forms it has large connections to the concept of social conformity. Perhaps I’m drawing more from the various comic versions of Espio, but he comes across to me as someone who is hyper-aware about how he presents himself.

Fun fact: a hierophant is essentially another word for a religious leader, although I’ve never seen it used outside the context of tarot. I assume the religious connection is the reason why in the OST of the Jojo part 3 anime, Kakyoin’s theme is called Noble Pope.

6: The Lovers (Amy Rose)

The Lovers represents love, communication, and passion; and Amy is certainly a character who wears her heart on her sleeve! She’s a good example of a character who I feel fits a number of different cards, however there are no other characters who suited The Lovers quite as much as her.

7: The Chariot (Sonic the Hedgehog)

The Chariot represents journeys, wanderlust as well as the ambition and willpower to achieve your goals, which I believe is the perfect match for Sonic’s adventurous and heroic spirit. This was one of the first cards I decided on and it’s probably the one I’d defend my interpretation of the most.

If you’re wondering why there’s dark and hero chao in the artwork too, it’s because the original card art depicts the titular chariot being pulled by black and white sphinxes, and this is my way of calling back to that.

8: Strength (Maria Robotnik)

This card pick might seem unusual at first if you take the word ‘strength’ at face value, however considering the original card art depicts a maiden peacefully taming a lion, perhaps the Strength card represents inner strength, courage and determination rather than physical strength. These are traits that I believe Maria possesses.

9: The Hermit (Knuckles the Echidna)

The Hermit signifies awareness and independence but when reversed can mean isolation and resignation, traits that parallel well with Knuckles and his duty to be the protector of the Master Emerald

10: The Wheel of Fortune (Big the Cat)

The Wheel of Fortune represents fate, karma and luck! This is admittedly a bit of a cheeky dig at myself since I’m awful at the Big fishing levels in SA1 and mostly got through them through luck. But that’s not to say the card doesn’t apply to Big himself! His frequent cameos do have a bit of a fate/destiny vibe to them and in IDW Big is lucky enough to manage to avoid the metal virus for quite a long time.

11: Justice (Vector the Crocodile)

The meaning of the Justice cards is… pretty much what it says on the tin: fairness and clarity. Of course the Team Chaotix detective agency represents this as a whole, but that trait especially shines through with Vector himself. He may be a little money oriented, but doing what is morally right always takes priority.

12: The Hanged Man (Shadow the Hedgehog)

The thing about Shadow is that he’s a fairly complex character which means there are a number of cards in the Major Arcana that match him well, but I knew early on when tackling this project that I wanted to assign Shadow to The Hanged Man. This card represents change, release and sacrifice, which all align well with the character arc that Shadow goes through during the course of SA2 and beyond.

13: Death (Tikal the Echidna and Chaos)

Despite the morbid name of the card, (and the admittedly macabre scene I’ve depicted) the Death card is not an inherently negative card to draw. Yes, it can mean endings and grief, but it can also mean letting go and new beginnings. The story that Tikal and Chaos go through in SA1, their anguish and how they later find peace, is something that I think pairs well with this particular card.

Fun fact: this is the only card in this project that has two significant characters on it rather than just one. I felt I needed both of them to be on the card in order to fully represent its meaning

14: Temperance (Blaze the Cat)

The Temperance card signifies balance, harmony and patience, which matches Blaze’s very poised and graceful demeanour. Admittedly I had a little bit of trouble deciding on a card for Blaze since the High Priestess and the Hierophant are also good matches for her.

15: The Devil (Rouge the Bat)

The Devil card represents temptation, seduction, and materialism and well… look, Rouge is one of my favourite Sonic characters, I’d be one of the first people to tell you that there’s a lot more to her than what initially appears, she is so much more complex than just sex appeal and a gemstone obsession. However, I felt there was no other character that matched the traits of this specific card better than Rouge, and so my choice was decided by that.

16: The Tower (E-123 Omega)

The Tower card represents a number of things; disruption, disasters, sudden changes etc, however the trait that made me believe that Omega would be the best selection for the card was violence.

17: The Star (Miles ‘Tails’ Prower)

Tails’ character arcs normally centre around him gaining independence and self-confidence and learning to believe in himself. He is also largely characterised by his unyielding faith and trust in Sonic. These traits are the reason why I believe The Star card represents him well, as it symbolises hope and faith.

18: The Moon (Shade the Echidna)

The Moon card symbolises mysteries and the unknown, and when Shade is first introduced in Chronicles, she and the rest of the Nocturnus Clan are certainly presented as mysterious. The Moon can also represent misconception, which fits well with how Shade was initially unaware of the true nature of Ix’s plans.

19: The Sun (Cream the Rabbit)

The Sun, when drawn in an upright position, has a lot of positive meanings! Freedom, fun, happiness, good luck etc. Cream’s cheerful and optimistic disposition makes her a good match for this card

20: Judgement (E-102 Gamma)

The Judgement card symbolises liberation, awakening, redemption and second chances, all of which I believe represent Gamma and his character arc in SA1 well

21: The World (Metal Sonic)

In the upright position, The World card symbolises triumph, completion, strength and happiness while in reversed position can mean failure, anxiety, lack of self-confidence etc. I had both positioning of the card in mind when connecting it to Metal Sonic; he is devoted to the tasks given to him and is self-assured in his belief that he is the true/superior ‘sonic’ yet he repeatedly finds himself at the hands of failure. But he doesn’t let previous failures hold him back, thus starting the cycle anew. (Another connection to the World card as it also symbolises cycles)

#sonic the hedgehog #tarot cards #I'd be curious to hear if people agree/disagree with my choices

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silver-chasm · 3 years

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A week ago, I made these icons of all my fursonas with all these pride flags (cause they're all trans lol). Two have a few extra flags/symbols on them, representing me

Two of the symbols you see here aren't lgbt ones. I'm not saying that what they represent should be part of the lgbt community, just that they're just as much a part of me as my queer identity

An explanation of who my fursonas are and what the flags are under the cut. I tried to be brief but some of these are a bit lengthy

1. Toxic Chasm

They're my main fursona (and the namesake of this blog). E is something called a Monsuno Sapien, a human mutated by alien essence (the species comes from the Monsuno series). She is me but more grounded and more at peace than what I was when I created him. Despite the grotesque and intimidating appearance, xe is compassionate and gentle. Chasm means a lot to me

The flags/symbols:

The bandana - genderqueer:

Genderqueer is a term that encompasses anyone who not only fall outside of the binary but also gender nonconforming people (those who "queer" their gender)

Chasm is genderqueer, partly because they contain the colours of the flag. Ze also challenges the idea of anthropomorphism with hir existence, much like how I seem to challenge the gender binary with my own existence

The garland - bigender

Bigender people have two genders. These two genders can be binary or nonbinary. A bigender individual may experience both of their genders simultaneously or shift between the two

In my case, I'm a man and a demiwoman at the same time ^-^

The hearts - bisexual and asexual

Bisexual is when you're sexually attracted to more than one gender. Asexual is when you don't experience sexual attraction. Asexuals may also still experience romantic attraction

Biromantic asexuals, like me, are physically unable to experience sexual attraction but are able to experience romantic attraction to more than one gender

The infinity symbol - neurodivergence

One of the non LGBT symbols. Neurodivergent people are those with neurodevelopmental conditions (such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia, etc) and mental health conditions (such as BPD, bipolarity, OCD, etc) and similar conditions, like schizophrenia. The infinity symbol is prominently used by autistic people, representing both the diversity of autism and neurodivergence

I'm 90% sure that I'm autistic. The other 10% is my anxiety keeping me in check

2. Korong

She is the fursona who I've had the longest (and was my primary fursona before creating Chasm). They're a giant monstrous dropbear with squid tentacles coming from her back and a second mouth on their belly. She is an absolute glutton. They are also the kind of being who would gloat about her power before trying to devour you

The flags:

The bandana - demigirl

Demigirls feel a partial but not complete connection to being a girl or woman. It is a nonbinary identity

Korong represented a past version of myself. Naturally, as I realised more about myself, she would change with me. They were never really "womanly", more monstrous than anything else

The flowers - a former vore pride flag

No, you didn't misread. This is the other non-lgbt symbol. Vorarephilia (shortened to vore) is a fetish where pleasure is derived from the idea of one being eating another (eg. snake eating a mouse, a giant holding someone in their mouth, etc). It's quite broad and typically fantastical in nature. The colours you see there belonged to a flag designed by a user here on tumblr, a genuine attempt at creating a pride symbol for vorarephiles. It wasn't a flag used outside of here. The creator has since deleted the post describing the flag, almost effectively wiping it from the internet

Korong is an embodiment of my vorarephilia. Her monstrous appearance also reflects a deep-seated shame toward this part of me I've had for years (and all for what? Strange thoughts?)

When I saw that flag and what it meant, I guess it gave me permission to feel something else towards this part of me. On top of the, the creator was reblogging vore positivity posts and posts where people were using their flag and being proud

For the longest time I thought there was something wrong with me. They showed that it's okay to be like this

Originally, I was going to draw the flag itself. I pivoted when I found that the original post (and the positivity posts) had been deleted. I drew it as hyacinths (flowers that represent grief and sincerity) because, as silly as it seems, I was dismayed that the flag and the little, safe, accepting corner of the internet had vanished. After all, what is left is a blue and purple symbol of mockery, with people disgusted that someone would think like that

I'm tired of feeling shame. As I said before, they're just strange thoughts that I cannot control. Nothing more

3. Hognose

They're a friendly Goodra, a slug dragon Pokemon. Much like the snake they're named after, Hognose has an upturned snout and a forked tongue. They're quite the skilled baker, with their favourite recipe being apple pie. They like cooking for their friends

The flag:

The bandana - agender

Agender people lack a gender, have a neutral or indefinable gender or don't identify with the concept of gender

Hognose doesn't have a gender. I forgot to give them one when creating them. Their gender expression does lean somewhat to femininity

4. Lantern

They're a baki, a goomba-like enemy from the Drawn to Life series. Technically, they've existed longer than Korong but I never considered them as a fursona. They were the mascot of my old blog thelanternwielder. They're a quiet being, tending to watch from a distance. Their eyes can cast light when its dark. They don't mind being carried by their handle (just don't swing them around too much)

The flag:

The bandana - nonbinary

Nonbinary people are those whose gender identity falls outside the man/woman binary. It's an umbrella identity, as there are many ways of not fitting in the binary

Lantern is another fursona I forgot to give a concrete gender to. And when I remembered, it didn't really make sense to gender them. They've always been a little bit unknown and mysterious, so their gender is vague and undefined to me

5. Aster

They're a fantail centipede/bee hybrid from space. Their hive lives in a moon above a resource abundant planet they collect and harvest from. Aster was one of the workers who became curious about what was beyond their planet and moon hive. So, they left and became a vagabond explorer among the stars

The flags:

On the left - agender

As it was stated, agender can mean 'genderless' and it can refer to those who don't identify with the concept of gender. Aster falls into the latter category as gender is a bizarre and foreign concept to them

On the right - intersex

Intersex people are those who were born with variation in sex characteristics that are 'atypical' from male and female sex characteristics. This can manifest in a number of ways, as sex is made up of several components. Intersex people can have any gender identity

In Aster's case, they are completely sexless. Their anatomy does not conform to the 'typical' sexes of humans (male and female). They are typical for their species, as many workers tend to be sexless

6. Hugs

He is a spotted hyena pyromancer who dances with fire. He's all about having fun and showing off his skill. He's easygoing and relaxed. His power comes from cinnabar he's imbued with

The flag:

The bandana - transgender

Being transgender is not identifying with the gender assigned to you at birth. Contrary to what some may assume, this does include nonbinary people (what do you think the white stripe in the flag represents?)

Hugs is trans guy. He's the only one here who has a binary gender

7. Alezan

He's the only child among my fursonas and the only one who was designed by someone else. They were designed by chibitacolord (here on tumblr!) He's an elfish fox child whose design is based on the raposa from Drawn to Life. Alezan mostly lives in the woods by themself, proclaiming himself to be 'the prince of the woods'. They're quite mischievous and playful. He loves flowers. They would be a florist if he was older

The flag:

The garland - genderflux

This is when the intensity of a particular gender changes. It can be considered a type of genderfluidity where the gender changes between something and nothing

Alezan is boyflux. The intensity of being a boy changes for them. Being so young, he doesn't quite have all the words to describe how he feels sometimes

8. Lasso

They're a strange being who has the body of an ox, the head of a humanoid crab and draconic wings. Their design is based on lamassu, ancient Mesopotamian guardian deities, and my Chinese and Western zodiac signs. Lasso was a being who was created at the edge of reality itself. As a result, they're incredibly inquisitive. They are also quite protective once they get attached to you

The flag:

The bandana - aitherogender

This is a xenogender. Some people feel that usual language around gender isn't able to describe the gender identity they experience, so they use metaphors to describe it. Aitherogender is an ethereal and otherworldly gender that is almost impossible to describe with written or spoken medium. It was originally intended for neurodivergent people but anyone can use the term

Given where Lasso came from, it would be likely that their gender wouldn't conform to human expectation or understanding of gender, let alone be able to be described in human language (or any language). I just thought it would be neat for them to have an otherworldly gender when they themself are otherworldly

#myart #personal #despite that last tag you have my full permission to reblog this #I'm very nervous about posting this and it's entirely because of thoss hyacinths

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ssthefamilyrp · 3 years

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BTS Post: How did the sides’ domains come to be? What inspired them?

Space: I love world building. Terra is definitely better at making dynamic characters, but describing how things look and work is my favorite thing to write besides dialogue. Roman’s Imagination was first (I love how it’s like a fandom-decided thing that the Imagination is a canon place). After that, I don’t really remember where they came from originally? Maybe Old Nico’s underground castle of insecurity was next? Either way, Nico’s, Patton’s and Deceit/Janus’ changed. So we’ll go through what inspired each domain!

Terra: I also like the idea of domains as a separate place to their rooms so that the sides could enter each other’s rooms without feeling the effects of their energies that the domains give off.

Roman: Land of Imagination

Terra: Romain’s domain was a fandom creation. After reading a bunch of fan fictions, I had a good understanding on how people saw how the Imagination would work like.

Space: Each of the sides have a “deed to the land” as one might say. They each have their own properties within the Imagination, they just don’t show that often. Logan’s training area in Abstract Logic Reprise, Patton’s quest area in A Heart’s Quest, Virgil’s bargaining scene in Grief are the only three I can think of off the top of my head.

Story time mode is a cool and scary concept (for those with an overactive Imagination) cause it kinda takes away the predictability of it. But, the Imagination demonstrates it just wants to help. It’s stories go according to plan (until Virgil breaks it) in a way that teaches a lesson. The overactive imagination department is handled by Remus’ Forest.

Remus: Forest of Intrusive Thoughts

Space: It just kinda made sense for him. It’s similar enough to the Imagination being it’s an open area where anything can happen, but it also added a sense of mystery and unease. As far as the sides being represented by something, when we were writing Unstable Karma I had the crack idea of the sides being represented by geese (after getting hissed at and chased by one in real life. The fear of being chased by a goose is equivalent to the fear of being chased by a horse). I think we scrapped that idea though.

Terra: I thought about it being octopus’s but I kinda scraped that as well. So, I don’t know what it is. Maybe just land again? Idk

Logan: Library of Knowledge

Terra: The Library of Knowledge just felt like a no brainer for Logan. A library is where you go to learn. It’s Logan’s sanctuary. I liked the idea of there being stories full of the information the sides have gathered. Yet it’s knowledge that Logan doesn’t read out of respect. Logan stays grounded on the first floor. Only looking at Thomas’ knowledge and his own.

Space: I do have questions about the domain throwing books at Nemo.

Terra: Nemo was trying to figure out if Patton was manipulative and the only way to figure that out was to see things from Patton’s perspective. So the domain provided.

Space: That begs the question, are all the domains sentient in a way?

Terra: … maybe

Space: Update, it has been confirmed. Watch out everyone.

Patton: Museum of Emotions (was Theater of Emotions)

Terra: I originally thought that Patton dealt with memory given the nostalgia his room gives off in the series. But nostalgia is more about the emotions of the memory than the knowledge of the memory. So I gave memories to Logan.

I thought the idea of a museum where they could touch important items made more sense for the Pat rat.

Janus: Corridor of Secrets (was Cave of Lies)

Terra: The change was made to go with the Patreon. Cerebus, the giant snake guardian was pulled from the original domain.

Virgil: Labyrinth of Anxiety

Space: Fun fact, a labyrinth is different from a maze. A maze has many paths, a labyrinth only has one. Doesn’t help your anxiety when you're walking it though. Sometimes you wonder if you’re ever going to get out even though you know you will. Living plants was a semi-creepy but cool idea to me. The anti gravity field at the center is symbolic (as Virgil explains to Janus in Metamorphosis) of the feeling of weightlessness, detachment, or lack of control that can come with anxiety.

Also Virgil has spiders now because the Halloween/Christmas video said so. Thank you for coming to Space’s ted talk.

Nico: Arena of Insecurity (was Underground Castle of Insecurity)

Space: Nico’s underground castle/dungeon was intended to be the opposite of Roman’s castle. A lot of stuff happened there and we wanted to get rid of nooses representing the sides among other things.

I knew I wanted to have horses representing the sides, but I was trying to figure out what kind of domain would work with them. A pasture? A desert? Then it hit me, an arena. As Theodore Roosevelt stats in his famous “The Man In The Arena” speech,

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;”

The arena is a big place when you aren’t on horseback, and it can be intimidating. Throw in a few 1200lb animals and you got yourself a victory or a death sentence. I did like the idea of it being in the middle of a wasteland (Lindsey Stirling’s The Arena vibes), so it’s on the dry side of the mountains separating it from the Imagination.

When it came to the actual horses, I had an idea of what breed I wanted each side to be. I remember Terra had Patton walk up to a blue horse, and I was like “nah, I want realism. The blue is paint”. xD The only two that changed breeds was Roman’s (was an Andalusian because Spanish origin and dressage and pure blood horses and stuff) became a Perchon after Roman comments on how big his horse was (size representing the influence of each sides’ insecurities).

Nemo’s was going to be a white (technically grey since the skin is grey not pink, but his coat would’ve been white) Gypsy Vanner, but I didn’t want his size to be second to Spell nor their colors the same (not when there’s a rainbow of horse colors). So his horse became based off a Fjord horse I saw for sale that I fell in love with but couldn’t buy (I’m broke college student. Help) who’s name was NEMO! So Nemo-the-Fjord-I-fell-in-love-with is now immortalized as Odyssey (a reference to Homer’s Odyssey featuring a character whose alias is Nemo). I also like the fact Ode and Dolos are both dun colored since Nemo and Janus are brothers.

As we were designing the domain, Terra mentioned how it kept reminding her of the Book of Life (which I still haven’t seen, but I thought of Disney’s Ferdinand). She suggested bullfighting as a way to deal with insecurities, and I liked it.

Terra: how dare you compare book of life to Ferdinand. Those are two completely different movies.

Space: I’m sorry I’m an uncultured swine xD

Nemo: Shores of Truth

Space: I am a west coast child through and through. Here, the sun rises in the hills and sets over the ocean, an endless freedom that wraps around the world, connecting everyone. When the sun sets over the ocean, it feels like a promise that it isn’t the end. Life keeps going, even when it seems like darkness has overtaken you.

There’s two places that make me feel undoubtedly okay. In the presence of a horse, and staring down the might of the ocean (why am I attracted to things I can’t control that could kill me. I’m not an adrenaline junkie I promise). I gave the ocean to Nemo, and in the rewrite Nico got the horses.

The shells that whisper truths were an improv thing. I had those “ocean in a shell” things as a kid and thought it was the coolest ever, wondering how they put the ocean in a shell (now I know it’s just how our ears work, lol). But the idea that truth often comes in a small quiet voice stuck with me. It doesn’t often shout above the noise, you have to intentionally quiet yourself in order to hear it.

#sanders sides oc #sanders side fic #sanders sides rp #sanders sides #ssthefamilyrp #ssthefamilyrp bts #ssthefamilyrp nemo #ssthefamilyrp virgil #ssthefamilyrp roman #ssthefamilyrp patton #ssthefamilyrp logan #ssthefamilyrp remus #ssthefamilyrp janus #ssthefamilyrp nico

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anhed-nia · 4 years

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i’m about half way through rewatching Serial Experiments Lain, and i’m really gratified by how good it still is. like, possibly i’m getting much more out of it the second time around, during this era of my life. i first saw it when i was about 20 and very much the target audience, an alienated young woman with much greater interest in the warmth radiating from my private obsessions--including my computer--than that which comes from human contact. i responded strongly to lain’s “shyness”, although today, it’s hard for me to imagine how i ever watched the show without thinking of her as neurodivergent. it isn’t just lain’s failure to connect, or the way she watches in confusion as her friend arisu tries to hold her hand; it’s how her personal growth escalates when she finally discovers computers. it’s easy to associate technological aptitude with autism, but for my purposes, her passions--computers, devices, the internet--could have been almost anything. (for me, for most of my life, it was drawing; lately, it’s more like writing) the point is that on the whole, some of us find ourselves through relationships, and some of us find ourselves through interests. the latter camp seems to represent a unique minority, and we know each other when we see each other. for me, the most potent passage of the show comes after lain has been contacted by ghosts from the internet--and in a cruel coincidence, she immediately has to grapple with the overtures of a group of classmates who have decided to befriend her. the day her new computer arrives, all she wants to do is set it up and unravel the enticing mystery that is giving lain her first real sense of purpose; but then, she has to respond to an invitation to go clubbing with her new friends. this was extremely powerful to me: i know that feeling so well, of *finally* finding something you love, that thrills you, that you can actually do, and the only thing you want out of your whole entire life is to be locked safely behind closed doors, alone, where you can mess with that Thing to your heart’s content. but, you have to do something--you have to go to a birthday party, you have to spend time with your family, you have to go support somebody’s show, you promised to have a drink with that friend you haven’t seen in ages, because you ALWAYS haven’t seen them in ages, and they can’t live on your promises of how much you love them in your heart and mind, you have to actually SHOW them (because society favors the lonely, and not the shy loners who need to hold on to their impoverished social energy as if it were their last breath of life, BUT I DIGRESS). and the whole time you’re dutifully Appearing At the Function, trying to tell yourself it’s not as bad or as embarrassing or as exhausting as you thought it was going to be, your THING is home, glowing, waiting for you, calling to you psychically, wondering why you would ever choose to spend your precious time doing anything else. of course, lain’s first night out turns out to be a lot more disastrous than the average social obligation, but any real-world equivalent of lain will tell you that even the most benign distraction makes you long obsessively for that time alone with your mystery, your hobby, your hyper focus, your special interest, your Only Thing You Really Want To Do. when lain comes home from her catastrophic night at the club, standing in her darkened room and gazing forlornly into the light of the computer monitor--the one she really wanted to be with all along--so many familiar feelings wash over me. first, the total energetic depletion you suffered during the social obligation hits you all at once; then, there’s that strange feeling of grief, a longing for the time you lost NOT Doing the Thing; at the same time, there’s the undercurrent of guilt, that you underperformed, made others uncomfortable with your ill-disguised anxiety, failed to offer other people the same enthusiasm you show to abstract concepts and inanimate objects; and finally, all this emotional noise is washed away in the waves of pleasure that crash over you as you find yourself at home, alone, with the one you really love. Serial Experiments Lain never needed all its scintillating cyberpunk trappings to get me on board; the simple story at its core, of an outsider discovering love and confidence through a Thing rather than a person--a Thing that is actually an extension of herself--was more than enough to hook me.

#serial experiments lain #anime #blogtober #ASD #neurodivergent #ryutaro nakamura #yoshitoshi abe #chiaki j konaka #animation

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sophieakatz · 4 years

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Thursday Thoughts: Sophie Sides

I cannot overstate how highly I recommend the web series Sanders Sides. In this scripted series, YouTuber Thomas Sanders shares the screen with a cast of characters, each a personification of an aspect of Sanders’s own personality – and each performed by Sanders himself. The ensuing debates and shenanigans are quick-witted, hilarious, and increasingly thought-provoking as the show progresses and more of Sanders’s “Sides” make their presence known.

I stumbled across these videos at a time when I really needed to do some serious reflection on some big questions, such as “What kind of person do I want to be?” and “Am I taking good care of myself?” – the kinds of questions that this show tackles. Sanders Sides has definitely helped me think through some difficult topics.

It’s also gotten me thinking about my own Sides. If I were to split my personality up into different characters, who would I find? I wouldn’t divide myself up along the exact same lines as Thomas Sanders, of course, though our personalities do overlap in some interesting ways.

Let me introduce you to the Sophie Sides!

Lilly – The Dreamer

If it’s time for fun and imagination, then Lilly is not only on board, but at the helm! She is my creative side, the source of my storytelling and my artistic drive. Lilly also embodies my more childlike aspects, including playfulness and optimism. She’s my love of fantasy novels, Disney movies, and puns – and it’s ridiculously easy to make her laugh. Lilly is a constant source of new ideas, so she can be really distracting when I need to focus on just one task. She believes that “princess” is a compliment no matter what tone of voice it’s said in.

(Lilly’s full name is Lilly Belle, a reference to Lillian Disney – Disney Studios ink artist, wife of Walt Disney, and the reason we know the famous mouse as Mickey rather than Mortimer! Lilly wears the longest, swishiest blue dress, perfect for twirling like a Disney princess!)

Maddy – The Mother

I’ve always been the Mom Friend, and Maddy is why. She is the personification of my idea of what it means to be an adult – rational, responsible, and nurturing. Maddy keeps my priorities in order and makes sure that I stay on track and on schedule for all the important things in life. This includes eating well, attending doctor’s appointments, doing homework, attending synagogue, developing my career, and taking care of my friends. Maddy loves structure, rules, and tradition, and so she embodies my religious observance as well.

(Maddy starts with M – M as in “mother” and “maternal”! The other Sides will call her “Mom” if she’s getting too overbearing. Maddy wears professional attire: a black blazer, black slacks, and a dark blue blouse.)

Vashti – The Warrior

For Vashti, the term “social justice warrior” is no insult. She is my morality – a strong, instinctive sense of right and wrong, combined with an incessant, selfless desire for things to be fair. Vashti also embodies my aggressiveness, defensiveness, and vindictiveness; she tends to show up when I’m really pissed off, and she’s a lot shoutier than the other Sides. She holds both me and the world to a very high standard, and she has an unfortunate tendency to jump to conclusions and see issues as black and white. Without her, I’d be a much worse person – but I’m glad the other Sides are there to balance her out.

(In the Book of Esther, Vashti was the queen of Persia. One night, her husband the king told her to dance naked in front of his friends. She refused! My mom used this story to inspire in me an early sense of feminism, and so Vashti seemed the perfect name for this Side. Vashti rocks matching blue jeans and denim jacket over a “Girls Rock!” t-shirt.)

Sidney – The Slacker

While the first three Sides are a “get things done” kind of people, Sidney… is not. She represents my laziness, self-indulgence, and procrastination. Sidney encourages me to expend as little energy as possible and to devote my time to leisure activities, which can put her sharply at odds with Vashti, Maddy, and Lilly. In Sidney’s defense, she is a much-needed source of “chill” in my life. Without her, the other Sides would burn me out!

(Besides the useful alliteration of “Slacker Sidney,” Sid is the name my parents had on standby if I’d been assigned male at birth. The name is mine, but also not mine – appropriate for a Side who embodies qualities about myself that the other Sides don’t readily accept as a part of me. Sidney wears a burgundy hoodie and dark blue sweatpants.)

These first four are the aspects of myself I’m most comfortable with. But, just like in Sanders Sides, the exploration doesn’t end there…

Ex – Anxiety

Two years ago, I wrote a fairy tale about a little monster named Ex who mimics other people’s voices, tricking you into imaginary arguments that get you all riled up about things that didn’t actually happen. When I started thinking about my Sides, Ex turned up again.

Ex would tell you that she’s my forethought, my ability to imagine the outcomes of future interactions. However, the scenarios she presents always run negative. It’d be more accurate to say that Ex embodies my anxiety. She insists that she knows, with 100% certainty, what other people are thinking and how they will react to me. Her goal is to keep me safe, but she tends to blow things out of proportion and leave me feeling downright awful.

(Ex is a shapeshifter, able to appear as anyone in Sophie’s life and even as the other Sides. Ex’s name is the variable X – a placeholder for whatever role she may choose to play. I’m reluctant to give her a name, lest the arguments I have with her taint my emotional response to anyone I happen to meet with that same name. When Ex appears as herself, she wears a long green trench coat and a blue fedora hat. She has little blue horns and a tail which are all obviously attached to her clothing instead of being a part of her body.)

(Side note – lately, I’ve been thinking differently about my interactions with Ex. I’ll talk a bit more about that in next week’s Thursday Thoughts!)

Mal – Depression

Mal embodies my depression and grief. Her appearances used to be much more infrequent, and it was easier to ignore her. Until this year, it’s been easier for me to see her as an enemy or as something that I should hide. But Mal shows up as an expression of my pain. While all the other Sides are talkative, Mal never speaks. Her presence alone is enough to derail a conversation with a wave of sadness; she quietly, sullenly commands attention.

(“Mal” is a Latin root meaning “bad” or “evil,” and Mal embodies the worst feelings I’ve ever had, in response to the worst things which have ever happened to me. She spends most of her time hidden under a pile of blankets, only sitting up when she wants to be noticed, so it’s unclear what she’s wearing. She has permanent dark blue tearstains on both cheeks.)

Eve – Yetzer Hara

If Vashti is Yetzer Hatov – the good inclination, my drive to make the world a better place – then Eve is Yetzer Hara – the evil inclination, my selfishness. As far as Eve is concerned, I should be my number one priority, everyone else in the world be damned! Vashti generally bans Eve from having a seat at the table, as it were, because once Eve has a say, she’s difficult to ignore. Eve is a smooth-talking politician with an agenda of ambition and pride. As Rabbi Nahman said, without yetzer hara telling us to envy our neighbors, we would never seek to improve ourselves. But as Rabbi Hillel said, if I am only for myself, then what am I?

(Christians blame the biblical Eve for “original sin,” and my Eve never met a deadly sin she couldn’t make sound appealing. Of course, she’d be the first to point out that in Judaism the concept of “sin” is much more complicated than that! Eve wears a light blue dress, much more form-fitting and much less swishy than Lilly’s. She has glowing golden eyes – and when she convinces the other Sides to listen to her, then their eyes start to glow, too…)

I ended up going much deeper in this little exercise than I expected to. Overall, it was a lot of fun! I don’t plan on making a web series about my Sides, but who knows? Maybe I’ll write a fic about them someday.

How about you? Are you a fan of Sanders Sides? Have you ever thought about what Sides make up your personality? If not, take a moment and try it out, and let me know who you discover – I’d love to hear about them!

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truthbeetoldmedia · 4 years

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The 100 7x01 "From the Ashes"

Welcome back to The 100 (for the last time). We have finally reached the beginning of the end and what a journey it promises to be. Last season ended with several big shockers, Abby Griffin was taken as a host for Simone Prime, the Flame was removed from Madi and effectively destroyed and Octavia Blake was stabbed and disappeared into a fine mist-ala Marvel characters after a Thanos snap. That means that the last season premiere The 100 will ever get already has a lot of questions to answer, in addition to (hopefully) managing to successfully wrap up a series that has spanned several years.

As in previous years I’ll be dividing my review into sections, previously these sections were a riff on the concept of “The Good, The Bad, The Ugly”. This season, I will be separating them based on plot line-as even in this first episode there are two different ones-until those plots begin to coalesce into one.

We’ll begin with what I am currently terming:

“The Main Plot That is Somehow Made Up of Only Side Characters (Two of Whom We Just Met)”

We pick up right where we left off, with Bellamy reeling from Octavia’s strange disappearance and rushing off into the woods around Gabriel’s compound to search for her. In his grief he’s less than observant and he is knocked unconscious and abducted by an apparently invisible force. These few seconds-less than 30-represent all of the screen time Bellamy Blake receives in the first episode of the final season of The 100. Fans who have been watching the promotion for the final season have become increasingly anxious over the absence of the male lead and it seems those anxieties were justified. It is astonishing and offensive that one of the core members of the show is removed completely from the story in the final season, his absence literally stripped from him as he is once again thrust back into a plot line he has only just managed to escape: his life (and thus his worth) being directly proportional to Octavia’s. As Hope escapes and Gabriel and Echo take off after Bellamy we finally actually enter “The Main Plot That is Somehow Made Up of Only Side Characters”.

Eventually, Gabriel and Echo run into Hope, who has discovered-albeit too late-a piece of paper lodged in her arm that states “Trust Bellamy”.That message doesn’t stop her from getting into a quick tussle with Echo and it’s obvious that she’s had some training-with a mother like Diyoza and some kind of relationship with Octavia, that’s not at all surprising. The three of them-after coming to a sort of peace with one another, journey for quite some time. It is full dark before they catch up with the invisible force that has taken Bellamy and when they do so, they find themselves caught up in the hallucinations that the anomaly causes.

Here we see Echo confronted by two ghosts from her past, King Roan and the actual Echo-the one she murdered in order to survive. Both ghosts make valid points-that Echo is a creature driven by servitude, which some I suppose would mistakenly call loyal. They even go so far as to question Echo’s purpose in life now that her current master (Bellamy) is missing. I don’t think it’s an unfair assessment. Echo latched on to Bellamy in Season 4, seeing him as an authoritarian figure and she never really let go. While I do believe that they both love each other, it seems very obvious that said love (at least on Echo’s part) is fueled by a need to have someone who she can serve. Who is Echo once she no longer has someone to answer to, who does she become when her one stabilizing figure is gone. I suppose that’s a question we’ll get answers to this season. Hope also sees a vision-albeit shorter-of Octavia telling her to stay quiet, no matter what she hears. As this is a line we’ve heard in the trailer, it seems obvious that the anomaly can also show someone memories and not just their innermost fears (what we see with Echo). Gabriel sees nothing-or at least nothing we see, but this is unsurprising given he’s studied the anomaly so long.

Finally managing to break free of the hallucinations that they’re being shown the trio manage to get the jump on a few of the invisible assailants and when they do the audience is shown the inside of their helmets. Hope they are told to kill on sight, indicating that she is somehow a known threat to them, but Echo and Gabriel are supposed to be reditioned to Bardo. I’d like to take the time to point out now that to rendition doesn’t simply mean to take. It means that you are treating these people as political prisoners who know potentially damaging information-and want to use any means including inhumane ones to retrieve that information. And Bellamy has already been taken. Despite the order to rendition Gabriel and Echo though, they don’t actually seem to want to capture them, instead continuing to rebuff them, together Gabriel, Echo and Hope manage to stop the assault and their story ends with them walking into the anomaly holding hands-so that they won’t be separated. It’s possible their next stop lands them directly in Bellamy’s path, but given it’s taken them so long to catch up with the Invisible Force I find that unlikely, especially given that the Force can apparently conjure up the anomaly whenever they choose to.

I do find it very interesting that the Invisible Force was also meant to capture Echo and Gabriel and yet-when they chase after Bellamy-the Force fights them off. I'm assuming that they choose to take Bellamy and leave the others so someone is left behind to tell Clarke that Bellamy has been taken.This makes sense as, Clarke being the main character, she’s likely the person they’re trying to ultimately take. It’s just one more piece of bait (that will produce no actual results) for Bellarke fans however. While the instinct is to be excited that whoever has taken Bellamy likely knows that Clarke will do whatever she can to save Bellamy, at this point we all know that nothing good is on the horizon for him.

This leads me into my next section:

“Almost All of the Mains are Here, but it Feels Like This Plotline is Unnecessary”

Sprinkled through this episode like bits of parsley (aka food grass) are the rest of the Arkadians (and yes I still call them that). So much of this particular plot feels like something that could have been taken care of during the Season 6 finale. Almost everything that happens in Sanctum could have been carefully tied up during the final bit of Season 6 and we could have begun this Season with the scene of Octavia being stabbed and disappearing. It feels very disjointed to watch Clarke (and the others) deal with the repercussions of what happened in space, like what to do with Russell Prime (especially as it appears that all of these things happen literally the day after the Season 6 finale). We’re expected to believe that Clarke has apparently gone through all of the stages of grief, somehow managed to find a perfect yellow farmhouse, set up Russell in what is essentially serving as a prison and begun to discuss plans for building a compound for the Arkadians all in, what is essentially a few hours after her mother’s death?

To top all of that off, we never see any cracks in the picture perfect “I’m fine” exterior until Clarke snaps when Russell hands over Abby's ring and clothes and begins to beat him rather brutally. It’s such a stark contrast to her behavior over the course of the episode that it just doesn’t align with anything that she’s done. To have Clarke go from “I want to do better because I don’t want Madi to grow up in a cruel society.” to “We’ve all made mistakes, tomorrow Russell Prime dies for his.” almost gave me whiplash. It would have been so much more believable if we’d seen small cracks in her facade over the course of the episode, but there were none. Am I meant to believe that-like Madi retains some of the memories of the Commanders before her even though the Flame is destroyed-that Josephine (and her sociopathy) linger in Clarke’s consciousness and that’s what made her brutally assault Russell? Or am I meant to believe that this is truly Clarke? I don’t know, but I do know that whatever message they were trying to sink there, it didn’t land.

I did really love Madi’s plot this episode. I enjoy that, now that the Flame is dead she doesn’t have to be a receptacle for a long dead love interest of Clarke’s. I enjoyed that she was going to school and has a house and a dog. I really liked that she was finally able to remind Clarke (and the audience) that she had a mother before Clarke and she didn’t just forget her because Clarke showed up. I did not like the fact that-even in the absence of the Flame-we are expected to believe that Madi still maintains memories from the commander and of course the one they choose to focus on is one of Clarke as Wanheda-meaning that it’s a memory of Lexa’s. It is infuriating to me that the Flame can be destroyed and yet Madi as a character somehow still exists as a mouthpiece for a character who has been dead for over 125 years at this point. It would be nice if this show could spend time actually developing the new characters they forcefully insert into the narrative every year, but I expect in the final season, that might be asking for a bit too much.

To further the refusal to leave the Grounders in the past, Jason somehow manages to have the Dark Commander transfer his consciousness into Russell Prime’s where he lurks in the background until Russell is knocked unconscious by Clarke (are we to assume Russell has not slept during this time as well?). My best guess is that he does this by using some type of Bluetooth/Wi-Ffi situation, When they are destroying the flame and uploading him into the Eligius ship. Because both are Eligius tech, the Flame and the mind drives created by Becca are similar. I assume the Dark Commander’s code searched for (and found in Russell-who was on the ship) something similar to his own tech and simply uploaded himself onto it in the background, waiting for an opportunity to show up. Now all that’s left is to see what type of fresh hell he unleashes on an entirely new planet-especially given some of the residents of said planet believe him to be a god.

I do find Murphy potentially interesting this year. For years he has managed to “cockroach” his way through situations. Staying alive through nearly impossible situations. But there seems to be a fair amount of turmoil surrounding his decisions as they relate to Clarke and Abby (and their deaths) as well as his decision to become a Prime. Given that connection with two of the three Griffin women, and my concern that Madi will find herself in danger once it’s discovered that she is no longer the Commander and once the Dark Commander manages to get her alone (which we all know will happen sooner or later), I would not be surprised if Murphy (who has never been one to make the sacrifice play) does so in this final Season.

Smaller things I enjoyed include Raven and Clarke’s relationship being on the mend. The two haven’t really been friends since Season 2 and Finn’s death, so it’s nice to see that-although it took Shaw and Abby’s deaths respectively-they seem to be leaning on each other at this time. With Clarke having lost all of her natural born family, it would not surprise me if she is willing to go to devastating lengths this Season to keep them all safe. I’m also very interested in the increased presence of both Gaia and Indra. As a fan of both Tati Gabrielle and Adina Porter (and their massive talent) in show’s outside of The 100, I’ve yearned for a deeper exploration into their relationship for Seasons. It looks like we might finally get to dive deeper into who they are now that Gaia is no longer a Flamekeeper and Indra no longer has a Commander.

Overall, I believe this is the weakest Season Premiere of The 100 to date, which is terribly disappointing given the fact that it’s the last one they’ve ever received. Even though we have yet to see the backdoor pilot (Rothenberg says it will be 708), it already feels like this final Season will serve more as a way to set up a show that will likely not take off the ground (because Rothenberg has successfully managed to upset every person in the show’s fanbase) than the sendoff to the existing characters and stories he’s spent 7 years building. It will be a terrible thing if that is indeed the case. Hopefully, based off of the title of this episode, The 100 will manage to make some sort of phoenix-esque ressurection. But for now, I don’t know if they have enough time to truly tell the story that Rothenberg wants to.

The 100 airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on The CW

Aprille’s episode rating: 🐝🐝

#The 100 #From the Ashes

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superbatson · 4 years

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tagged by @chestnutblondehead

Rules: Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions. Don’t cheat. Tag some people.

roswell, new mexico

zoey's extraordinary playlist

the witcher

the healing powers of dude

high school musical: the musical: the series

Who is your favorite character in 2?

i feel like i gotta say leif bc he's my icon and i love mtg A Lot. and it wouldn't be wrong, i definitely think leif is my favorite from the show. but i do love zoey too, i have to admit. she's a very close second. (and she would be #1 if i didn't love hot villains so much, lol)

Who is your least favorite character in 1?

can i say isobel? i feel bad saying isobel but i guess with all the possession stuff in s1, i just felt i couldn't like her, especially before we found out about the possession stuff and i thought it was a dual personality thing. i haven't started s2 so maybe she'll grow on me in those eps.

What is your favorite episode of 4?

ughhhh they all really blur together. i mean, not in a bad way, but they were really so closely tied to one another - i guess episode 5, "middle school musical". it was sweet seeing noah and simon supporting amara, and i felt it was a good episode to represent disabled people. i mean, it really shined a light on the way society treats them, and it ended up with said disabled lead amara finally getting her time to shine. who knew she could sing so well?

What is your favorite season of 5?

it's only got the one so far, lol. so i guess i have to say that's my favorite for now, but it probably won't be for long with s2 focusing on a production of batb

Who is your favorite couple in 3?

they're not canon (yet) but geralt/jaskier. obviously. let the bard be gay for the hot monster killer!

Who is your favorite couple in 2?

can i just say leif/tobin to avoid any sort of controversy? so... leif/tobin. (the coder boyfriends!)

Who is your favorite actor in 4?

jace chapman is an excellent child actor. he particularly shines in the scenes where noah is experiencing intense anxiety. they're so similar to how i feel/act/think when i'm anxious, so i was really able to see myself in the character. i have to say, i do love larisa oleynik and tom everett scott too as noah's parents. they're fun, cute, and dorky without seeming incompetent and they really do have noah's best interest at heart. it was really sweet to see and i almost wish they could be my parents, lol. (though i also think they're pretty as hell so that probably wouldn't work out for me, haha)

Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5?

apples and oranges, man. like, one's a cheesy teen drama, another is a heartfelt musical dramedy, and the other is... well, a teen dramedy? okay, so there are some similarities, but it's hard for me to choose. i can say that zep is the one i enjoy most right now, just 'cause it's such a feel-good show to watch with everything going on in the world right now, but overall? i might have to say hsmtmts, just 'cause i really feel so attached to those characters/that world as a whole (even if the pacing of s1 got a little messy at times).

Which show have you seen more episodes of - 1 or 3?

roswell, new mexico. ironically, though, i really need to play catch-up on both. i now have several s2 eps of rnm to watch, and the second half of witcher s1!

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

i literally am noah, let me just put that out there. like i relate to him so much, he's basically me when i was his age, just i'm a girl and he's a boy. i guess if i had to pick a character to be, maybe amara? bc she's a friend of his so she gets to kinda see things from the outside and help him out when he's struggling. (though poor girl is also pining for him hard, ugh, tween love is so messy. i never had a legit crush on a boy till i was 14, so i'd probably be safe in that regard.)

Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work?

wow i really mixed up my own numbers here and started writing about a witcher/zep crossover, whoops

hell no. witcher is a bloody adult fantasy and healing powers of dude is a sweet kids' show. a crossover would never work. (though now i'm thinking about jaskier and geralt being father figures for lost orphan noah and i'm emo. it's such a crack-y concept but i like it lol)

Pair two characters in 1 that would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple?

from what i can remember in s1, michael & liz had a fun dynamic. sort of a love-hate thing (as opposed to her and max which was nothing but love). i think they'd make an interesting pair. especially given the end of s1, as they'd bond over their shared grief over max.

What is your favorite episode of 1?

pffft i don't know. i almost wanna say the pilot, just bc it was the first scripted show i'd started watching after, like, a whole semester of barely watching anything, and it also brought me back to the cw after i quit watching the flash. plus, i obviously didn't really know what to expect, so i was impressed with the way the show got me invested in both max/liz and michael/alex in the span of one 42-minute episode.

What is your favorite episode of 5?

i also gotta say the pilot bc it was probably the funniest episode, in that it felt the most like some sort of self-aware mockumentary comedy, and the end cover of "start of something new" made me super nostalgic for the original hsm film. both of those elements kinda faded as the show went on and we got so invested in the characters, so, yeah. it was fun while it lasted.

What is your favorite season of 2?

it's only got the one, so again, that's kinda the only one i can give as my answer? but hopefully it gets renewed for at least a second 👀

How long have you watched 1?

it premiered in... like january, i think, of last year, so... since then. like a year, though as i keep saying, gotta play catch up on s2.

How did you become interested in 3?

henry cavill. yeah, that's it. he's hot and it was his first major project following the rumors about him being out as superman, so i wanted to see what it was all about. also, considering it's netflix, i was kinda hoping we'd see his ass, but apparently we do not. netflix can give us pine penis but not cavill ass. Sigh.

Overall, which show had the better storyline, 3 or 5?

i guess hsmtmts bc it kept me the most engaged? but it was also not bingeable, so. kinda hard to accurately compare the two. but i guess that's my answer, bc witcher was kinda confusing at times (and i haven't watched it since like late december/early january)

Which has better theme music, 2 or 4?

neither really has an official theme song, unless you count the music that plays over the title card at the beginning of their respective episodes. i guess i like the matching band sound of hsmtmts', but they're both so short to compare to one another.

if you ask me to compare soundtracks, i might also have to give an edge to hsmtmts just bc of the nostalgia factor and their amazing original songs. sorry, zep!

i tag: @waystobewicked @willlamschofield and anyone else who wants to do this bc i'm too lazy to tag rn lol

#tag game #long post

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zchaotic · 5 years

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Finished my US Mono Fairy Type Run. Now it is time to review.

I just beaten Giovanni and ended RR.

Replaying the Ultra Games have given me a pretty good perspective on Gen 7′s Alola games.

The Ultra games are as their names implied, better versions of SM in every aspect to me. Keep reading if you are interested.

The Pro’s. The Story changes.

Lillie’s arc may have not been given as much focus as SM. But it dawned on me what her story really was. It wasn’t about an abused child standing up to her abuser. It was about a timid girl being inspired by those around her to become brave enough to protect those close to her and to become strong enough to do it. That is what her Z Powered Form represents, her getting over those doubts and anxieties, becoming her own while she takes on the world.

That is why she wanted to save her mother in SM. To try and save that woman from herself. I personally believe that Lillie’s arc, while losing some of that focus from SM, had a better trade off in USUM due to how it ends, instead of Lillie going to Kanto to help Lusamine recover and essentially going back to her.

Through out both games, Lillie kept admiring trainers for the things they do and breaks out of that shell. Once we get to the end of the Necrozma plot, Lillie settled things with Lusamine and only went to Aether Paradise with that woman to see Nebby recover. Once that happens, the two parted ways and if you go to Mahalo Trial after beating Gladion, we see Lillie do the last thing needed before becoming a trainer, giving the same emotional goodbye to Nebby.

Once you beat the league and start RR. We see Lillie at the start of her carrier as a pokemon trainer. Kicking a grunts butt and fighting along side you. She becomes for feisty even against freaking Ghetsis and for those picky about Lillie’s confession at Exeggutor Island, that girl has what is pretty much the same confession towards you at the end of RR.

In addition, Lillie’s story ends with her living with Kukui, at a more healthier environment and her wanting to become you Battle Tree Partner.

Gladion’s motives are more fleshed out in USUM, with him stealing Type:Null and running to A. Get away from Lusamine and Aether Paradise due to the toxic controlling environment... much like in SM. And B. So he can become strong enough to protect those close to him once the moment is needed. To keep his family from falling apart more than it already had.

The change between SM and USUM doesn’t hurt his arc and dare I say USUM is a bit more realistic in this regard.

I also liked how his story ends in USUM compared to SM. In SM, he was forced in an adult position in the place he was abused in and wanted nothing more to do with. Because a certain adult close to him couldn’t take the job herself.

In USUM however, because Lusamine didn’t get sick, he got more freedom for the next step of his arc. To get more of that strength, he went to Kanto this time... had a pretty cute goodbye to his reforming mother and spend a whole month training. He comes back in a month with a full team of six and is the toughest of the title defense matches in USUM. He is needed to trigger the games true ending.

Finally, the seemingly biggest change in USUM’s story.... Lusamine.

I liked the changes to her character. In SM we had no reason to care about her, she was an unrepentant cunt and the hints that she wasn’t always that horrible came from the mouths of other characters. We got a good villain, but the bigger picture of her was written very badly.

In USUM. We still have Lusamine go nuts due to trauma from Mohn’s disappearance and as a result of her not wanting to let things go, became more controlling of her kids and obsessed over the Ultra Wormhole and the things beyond to try and get Mohn back.

This resulted in her allowing and doing messed up stuff in her desire for vengeance. Including allowing the creation of Type:Null and being willing to have Nebby go through all sorts of horrible stuff. Gladion was the first to find out about this, took Null and left. Which resulted in Lusamine being more grief stricken and while not mentioned in USUM, resulted in her becoming more controlling over Lillie.

Eventually, Lillie couldn’t stand Nebby’s suffering, stole it and ran.

Leaving Lusamine alone and with nothing left... in SM this resulted in her becoming focused solely on the wormhole and the only beast that she has clues on. Nihilego. But in USUM, something changed in the ripple that prevented her from getting to the levels seen in SM. The Ultra Recon Squad showed up and went to the Aether Foundation for help on their problems, they told this woman about the beasts and about something for her to focus her objections on... Necrozma.

In USUM, we see Lusamine as someone who develops a messiah complex. If she can go beat Necrozma, she would live up to her position as a protector of pokemon and people along with having the resources needed to find Mohn. She still has Mohn as an objective in mind, but she is still pretty crazy due to how she was conducting reckless things with Ultra Wormholes. (The point of the scene in Aether Paradise in USUM.) Froze her pokemon. (Not wanting to lose those close to her.) and was bitter/ nasty to her kids when it was time to confront her.

Lillie is scared of Nebby getting killed with little she can do about it and Gladion is more scared due to how if Lusamine crosses that wormhole, the family will likely lose another parent. But this woman is so stuck up in her ambitions that she refused to listen to her kids and do it anyways.

This is pretty real in broken families where the adult acts like it is their way or the highway and those not them are to shut up.

In USUM, Lusamine is still a horrible person... but it actually gives her some onscreen humanity. While she is less scary of a villain compared to SM, she is better as an actual character in USUM. A woman who has gone off the deep end in her ambitions to get a loved one back and keep the family together, but is so blind in how she done it that her kids ended up suffering.

This was always what Gamefreak intended to make with her Character. But they messed up badly in SM and instead created a caricature of an abusive parent. This one was so chilling in that regard that the fanbase are often only seeing that aspect of her character and believing that is the intention of her character. An abusive parent to get toppled over.

This is why the fanbase are not a fan of USUM’s Lusamine, who is made more human and have more going for her that people are confused in figuring out whether or not she is evil and even more, this version of Lusamine shattered the fanbases head canons on what kind of person this woman was. People don’t want to admit they are wrong and instead lash out.

Especially towards the end of USUM where Lusamine got curb stomped by Necrozma and had a heart to heart talk with Lillie while you were busy. Lillie told is at Vast Poni Canyon what she wanted to tell Lusamine about.

"The president... My mother is— She's selfish. She decides all by herself what she thinks needs to be done to make other people happy, not even caring what it is they may want... But people ought to help one another out! That is what I have learned here in Alola! And that is what I'm going to teach her, too.”

This combined with Necrozma knocking Lusamine off her high horse, gave this woman a self reflection and realization on what she was doing and started her turn around for the better.

Apologizing to Lillie by admitting the girl was right to take Nebby and run. (Admitting that Gladion was right to do the same with Null.) Making it up to Nebby by tending to it with Lillie. Then letting the girl go off back to Kukui’s

Making it up to Gladion by seeing him off when he went to Kanto...

Letting her kids go, is the first major step to Lusamine making it up to her kids.

Then in between the Champion ending and RR, she has an identity crisis from the realization of how awful she was. This gets resolved after RR when she vowed to love her kids from a distance, without interfering with their lives anymore. All the while, trying to understand her kids better.

After RR, you find that same employee who talked about the frozen pokemon and we got implications that Lusamine is having those ready to be thawed.

Then once Gladion comes back, we got a scene where Lusamine meets an amnesic Mohn. Knowing that the man would be hurt for the rest of his life if he knows the things his wife has done for him, along with the new life he has... Lusamine treats it like an ordinary conversation and lets him go off to his life. Letting... Mohn...go.

This is pretty good character development despite how the juicy bits of her turn around happen after the main story is over and how you have to really look to get it.

I appreciate the closure and resolution of this family in USUM since SM ended this story very messily when it should have continued.

While I give a lot of praise to this portion of the story, other character like Hau are more fleshed out. Mina’s trial gave a bit more world building to the Captains. The Ultra Warp Ride in itself is good lore on the UB’s, for we see their world and learn more about them. We also know more about Z Power and where it all comes from.

Alola’s lore was expanded upon in this game.

We also get to see Guzma go through a redemption arc in RR and all the good that came out of it. Colress got to contribute more in the main story as the guy who helps with Necrozma.

Don’t even get me started on Rainbow Rocket. That is where we see Lillie’s grow into a trainer, fight past villains, see more from Colress and Guzma, along with adding into the concept of alternate realities. It was a better post game than SM in every aspect.

Con. What was added into the story and how it affected the changes.

However, there is a few things story wise that I would say are striking flaws.

Before anything, this is still mostly the same story as SM and it doesn’t change drastically until the end of your second visit to Aether Paradise. Like most third games, it is going to take a while before you get to the biggest changes. If you didn’t like what was in the base games... you are not going to like what is in this game.

The new characters added to the plot, the URS... their deeds are mostly background and they don’t do much besides build up on Necrozma. Sometimes appearing in places that they are not needed.

The things they do add does make sense in changing the story from SM. (It is established they only used their Solgaleo and Lunala for travel. If they used them for Necrozma, they would have their way to get help eaten and as explained, it causes Necrozma even more pain. They let Lusamine use Nebby because they need a safer way to send trainers over to confront Necrozma.... but then Lusamine went Leeroy on them.)

But they themselves... could have been done better. In addition, Necrozma served more as a looming threat that motivated the actions of the regions villain teams and their goals. Rather than a looming threat that could have been used much better to give the urgency and doom. He showed that the URS and those scared of him were NOT wrong to be scared of him, but that is all at the climax. Poor build up, but amazing pay off.

Even more, Lillie and the narrative focus on her lessened when you go fight Necrozma. Exeggutor Island was removed, though I get the reasons. Lusamine being less of a bitch and Lillie’s scene at the end of RR made it redundant. This along with Lillie calling her mother out off screen made some moments with her weaker compared to SM. (It isn’t any worse than how Lillie and Lusamine resolved things in SM though. Where Lusamine recovered somewhat and Lillie was eager to not only forgive her... when it wasn’t earned, but go to Kanto to help her recover.) Even though I believe the things that happened with Lillie after Necrozma more than made up for it.

Some would come to conclusions and say this cost Lillie her character development... the thing that made SM’s story good. But personally, it didn’t really hurt her development, it just lost focus and we got our pay off to the build up in the post game.

However, if you liked Looker, Anabel and Nanu... those three got the shaft completely due to their post game story being cut out for Rainbow Rocket.

Pro. The Gameplay.

USUM added a lot into the game compared to the bare bone SM game.

With Mantine Surf, the Photo Club, Ultra Warp Ride, quality of life changes, (move tutors.) more pokemon and the SOS system being more controllable. You will be picking up Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon over Sun and Moon in a heart beat, just for these things.

The battles are more challenging compared to SM, the Totem Pokemon were better realized as actual bosses and Ultra Necrozma is the highlight of your main campaign.

Not to mention Rainbow Rocket and all the joys I got out of playing that. This is the game to play if you want to do challenge runs... like a Mono type run or others. It feels satisfying to beat the game and see the closure to our characters stories. Not to mention all the side quests and visuals that make Alola feel more alive as a region and not die over when you finish the game.

Con. What stuck from SM in a gameplay perspective.

Unfortunately, USUM didn’t fix all the issues from SM. Multi Battles are laggy, Festival Plaza stinks and with how many cut scenes are in this game still, it is going to be a while before you can actually play the game.

In addition, Alola is a linear in its pathway and what you fight still. If you just played SM... you are going to get bored really quick. In addition, the focus on Gen 1 is going to get old here as well.

Final Verdict.

Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon are the last games in the handheld era and Gamefreak did a fantastic job in making this game a hurrah.

With most of what made SM good going over into these games, getting polished out and turned into a funner game, I strongly recommend getting it while holding yourself over for Sword and Shield.

It has fantastic battles, an amazing sense of closure to the characters from Sun and Moon you came to know and love. (Lillie is my favorite of this generation and I hope to see her again with more development as a trainer.)

It hits a lot of good beats for me and I am still rather shocked that people give so much bile to what these games have to offer. The changes to the Story were not bad in the slightest, it isn’t perfect but we have a lot of good trade offs to what we did lose from SM. (Example. Lillie’s two big moments are either moved over to RR or provide a better resolution to her story arc.)

The games give a good challenge for anyone who are fans to the series and it makes Alola stand out as a region.

I honestly hope Sword and Shield is able to continue where these games leave off. Maybe give us a story that is built by exploring Galar and still giving us a challenge with a wide variety of pokemon.

#Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon review.

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kriss-the-writing-nerd · 5 years

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11/11/11 tag game

Answer 11 questions, make 11 new questions, tag 11 persons!

I was tagged by @waterfallwritings for this! Thank you, your questions were really interesting and fun to answer! o(^▽^)o

(Sorry if I got a bit lengthy, it was just so nice to do something not university related after exams!)

1. How do you come up with ideas for your WIPs?

The heavy artillery from the get go, eh? *cracks knuckles* Okay, to be honest, I'm not sure. I've never really thought of it, they're just there, clamoring for attention (plot bunnies are my best ally and worst enemy). I definitely have bouts of very intense inspiration and days when I just,, can't. Even if I know where the scene is going, how it's going, and why, the words aren't there. Or they're all wrong. (This is when I default to writing ugly-crying emotional breakdowns or sex. Likely both.)

Working out a story is a game of association laced with concepts and core elements for me. Like this: dragons (core element) + mountains (association) + tribe/clan (concept) + shapeshifting (association/concept) + relocation/settlers (core element). And that's basically my dragon wip.

Eld's story is based on a Doctor Who quote "demons run when a good man goes to war". Ren and Kuro grew up with me; at some point they just started acting on their own - I just throw shit at them and sees what shakes loose at this point. (They have five kids! How???? did that?? happen???)

(I'm a sucker for prompts. My brain can see a single word and just, run of with it hollering in glee.)

2. How do you get past gaps in the plot?

Urrrrgh, I have to get past them??

I struggle, is what I do. Typically I let it sit, soundly on the back-burner in my mind, until I've mulled through my story to the point where the hole is gone. (This takes months, and with my sci-fi wip I ended up rewriting the dang thing completely at the third draft after eight years of working on it. Scrapping it was painful.)

Or I try a different angle. Sometimes it works.

3. What motivates you to keep writing?

I love writing. There's really no more significant reason than that. Writing allows me to express myself, create and explore worlds and characters who wouldn't exist otherwise. And it lets me just exist without any layers. When I've been hurting, writing has helped me get the pain out with no more than tears.

And I love words and languages; the way we have about 10 different words to say "snow" (partly because Swedish mesh several words into one but still) and maybe 2 (3?) for heat. That there are groups of languages with the same ancestors that are so close; how absolutely amazingly different they can be (I just learned "y" is not considered a vowel in English and I'm???? Completely blown. What. What do you mean it's not a vowel. Are you sure???). And languages with different alphabets and ones that use pictures to represent ideas instead of sounds! And sign languages!!

And idioms! It's so cool how idioms can carry words of wisdom, caution and reassurance, and rarely can be translated (classical examples from Swedish "There's no danger on the roof" and "The rain is standing like sticks in the ground") because they lose their connections to the cultures they are used in.

The universes in my head are as full of life as the real world and not nearly as anxiety-inducing. I have stories to tell. And you know that feeling when you’re in the zone and everything is flowing and you’re writing 10′000 words in a go? That.

4. Do you do any other kind of creative writing?

I dabble in poetry? Like, very sporadically and with mixed results. I have a friend into slam poetry who opened my eyes to it, too.

(Would fanfiction go here too?)

5. Do you have any other creative hobbies besides writing?

Urngh, yeah, too many. If I’m not reading, my hands need to be moving or I’m an unhappy bean. Though, writing is the only thing I never put down. Ever.

Okay, so, I draw (badly), both on paper and digitally. Mostly landscapes. I also try to make house sketches/plans. And I paint (a bit better than I draw), prefer oils or acrylics over water colors. My partner and I also paint miniature models when there is time.

I also crochet and knit, and I love origami. I roleplay (Dungeons & Dragons, whenever the DMs have time), and I play the violin (and piano) and write simple music for myself.

I garden if there's time in the spring and during summer, and I absolutely love these little fairy-gardens that have been popping up everywhere. On that note, I have more houseplants than I have space for.

I'm also thinking to start up a little thing making bracelets and bead strings for fidgeting. I needed some kind of stim toy to be able to focus and I wanted something silent with many different sensations to keep me entertained. I hunted around a bit but eventually made my own and they turned out pretty nice!

(I also like to bake, especially pies and breads.)

6. What do you do when you’re stuck on a scene and don’t know how to get it out / write it?

I slam the key words in. And then I ignore it until it stops fighting back so much.

Or I backtrack. Sometimes I've written myself into a corner unknowingly.

Sometimes I drop a wip that's giving me grief and work on another, or I use word/idea prompts to get me started.

7. How do you decide how to end your WIP?

God, please tell me because I don't hecking know. Should I do an epilogue? Should I leave it open/ambiguous? Should I just cut it off and leave the next step to the reader? Should there be a "true" ending, with goodbyes (actual or metaphorical)?

Urrrrrrrrgh. Good Lord, endings.

8. When in the process of writing do you decide how its going to end? Or do you kind of just wait til you get there?

Either I know from the start, before I write the first words, or I wait. Which tends to mean frustrating the hell out of myself. I have started to go through my wips (whether original or fanfiction) and give them all bare-bones outlines, because not having endings is a big problem for me.

9. Why did you decide to join writeblr?

Basically when I decided I had had enough of the "join to see more" button or the "sensitive material" warning. And when I realized there was a really nice writing community here I could maybe become a part of. (A major reason was actually @concerningwolves advice posts.)

10. What’s your favourite food?

(CW: Maybe skip if you’re vegetarian/vegan/you’d rather not read about meat.)

Chinese deep-fried chicken with sweet-and-sour sauce (not the spicy chili kind, the actual pineapple and tomato juice based kind) with rice. No question about it.

Mom's "blodbröd med fläsk" is a close runner up though, but we only eat it once a year, at the midwinter solstice. It's homemade Swedish tunnbröd (hard thin-bread) with blood instead of water in it that you dip in boiling water to make it soft, with white sauce, and fried, thoroughly salted pork.

(Believe me, some country-side Swedes in the northern parts are still pretty pagan about the sun coming back, me included. It's a big deal when you go between no night/darkness and then very little/no sun.)

11. If you had to kill off a character in your WIP, who would it be and why?

People are dying right and left in most of them already, since three include large-scale wars, so there's no shortage there.

But if I had to choose a main-character or a directly supporting character? (MY BABIES! NO.)

I think Ren, from the sci-fi wip, because he would be free from both responsibility and physical and mental pain. (My boi is a wreck.) It wouldn't be unlikely either. But at this point it would destroy my story! 😂 Less story-destroying would be their foster-guardian Sandra. It would still force me to write a completely new arc, but it would be do-able.

Although, regarding the fantasy wip Firestorm, Kebarock dying in their war would crush Sunling. That could be done without losing the plot entirely. Hmmm.

Puh, that was a lot of thinking! Okay, I'll be tagging.. @concerningwolves @weaver-of-fantasies-and-fables @adorhauer @focusdumbass @sleepy-and-anxious @els-writes @meteorwrites @sebastian-writer @telvivere @thescribesloft and @aceymichaelis No obligation to do this of course! <3 (And if I tagged you and you’d rather not be tagged in games, I apologize, please let me know)

And here are your questions if you want to:

1. What about your wip makes you smile?

2. What's the hardest decision you've had to make in regards to a wip?

3. What text font do you prefer writing in? Or do you write by hand?

4. Are there pets in your wip? If not, what pet might your character(s) keep?

5. What AU would you love to see/write for your wip?

6. Is there any type of music/a song in particular that you associate with your wip?

7. Are you a night owl or an early bird/When do you write?

8. Favorite beverage?

9. Where do you prefer to write? At home? In a library? On the bus/train?

10. What are your first 3 to 5 associations with the word 'writing'? Why those?

11. What do you do when you're bored?

Hope you enjoy! o(^◇^)o

#11/11/11 tag #11 asks tag game #tag game #ask game #writing related #writing community #writeblr community

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dailyaudiobible · 3 years

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05/03/2021 DAB Transcript

Judges 17:1-18:31, John 3:1-21, Psalms 104:1-23, Proverbs 14:20-21

Today is the 3rd day of May welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it’s great to be here with you as we get busy about our work week our first workweek of this month of May. But before we do, let's just center ourselves, exhale all that anxiety, come around this Global Campfire and let the Scriptures speak. We’re reading from the New International Version this week, working our way through the story of the different judges of Israel, which is a period of several centuries between Joshua's leadership and the time of the monarchy, the time when Israel decides it wants a king. So, let's dive in. Judges, chapters 17 and 18 today.

Commentary:

Okay. In our reading from the book of John today we encounter I think probably the most famous passage in all the Scriptures, at least in the New Testament. We can probably say it together, “for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.” What may be a lesser-known, as is the case with a lot of very famous versus, is the context of this…this saying. It was Jesus himself who said this passage, “for God so loved the world.” Jesus said that. He said it to a man named Nicodemus, who was visiting Him under the cover of the night so that he wouldn't be exposed to the rest of the Council that he was having a private meeting with Jesus. And it's in that context of that conversation that Jesus tells Nicodemus, “you gotta be born again.” And that's where we get the concept that we use when we talk about being born again. This is all coming from a conversation between Jesus and Nicodemus after dark one night long ago. Of course, Nicodemus is a grown man. He's a…a scholar of the Torah. So, he's confused. Obviously, like, how would a person go back into their mother's womb and be born again. And this is when Jesus explains this salvation process. A person is born of water, which represents a physical birth into life and a person can be born again of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit gives birth to new life within. That's what being born again means, that the spirit of God is within us, integrated within us, completing us as human beings as we were intended to be from the beginning. When we believe this, when we believe Jesus, we open our hearts to God's Spirit and we’re never the same again. According to Jesus when we do believe there is no longer anything held against us to condemn us. But for those who do not believe they’re all…they��re already experiencing condemnation. Like there already experiencing judgment or I just quote Jesus here. “whoever believes in Him…” Actually, let me just back up. “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world but to save the world through Him. Whoever believes in Him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.” Then Jesus goes on to talk about how light, when light comes into the darkness, those in the dark that don't want to be in the light go further into the darkness. Like they don't want to be exposed. And that should generally be easy enough to see in the world. Just a little bit harder to see it in ourselves. So, you know, the question that arises then is, “what am I trying to keep in the dark?” You know, “what am I afraid of being exposed? Because whatever I'm afraid of being exposed, that's ultimately pulling me deeper into the darkness.” And we have probably already learned by now that life on the margins in the shadows, there's not really any life there. And, so, this is one of the examples where we see Jesus teaching a lesson, giving us really the essence of salvation from His own lips, but also this theme of darkness and light that permeates Jesus’ teachings. It’s this contrast between false and true. And we try to spend our lives because of the way our culture is made up, because of the repercussions we…we live most of our lives, kind of in the shadows, right? When Jesus...Jesus was true. He was total light. And the and we see what the darkness is capable of as we look at…what it…how it raged against Jesus. We should also remember how that story ended. Jesus, the light of the world returned to victorious over the darkness and we don't have to live in the darkness anymore. We would call that the good news. That's the good news that we’re supposed to be living and demonstrating and explaining.

Prayer:

Father, Holy Spirit come. Allow us to grow in our understanding and the depth of our awareness of our salvation and of our intimacy of our connection with You, and of Your desire…and this is the part that’s so overwhelming…of Your desire for the connection with us, a desire so profoundly deep that You sent Your only son, that You love the world so much that You sent Your only son, that whoever would believe in him will not perish but have eternal life. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it is definitely the website, and it's definitely a place to find out what’s going on around here. If you're using the app, you can access all of this as well by using the Drawer icon in the upper left-hand corner of the app screen. But there are a couple of sections that…that are worth being familiar with. And, so, I try to familiarize us one way or the other each day.

The Community section. This is definitely where to get connected on social media. It's also where the Prayer Wall is. And so…and it lives there always, and it's always on so we can always have a place to go and pray. And, so, being familiar with that is…it is certainly important.

Also, the Daily Audio Bible Shop. There are resources that have been developed there over these years, specifically for the journey that we’re on, whether that be things to write with, or things to write on or things to wear, things to listen to, things to read, go deeper. So, just check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop as we continue our journey forward.

And if you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, if what's happening here around the Global Campfire every day brings light and warmth and good news into your life than thank you for your partnership. There is a link on the homepage at dailyaudiobible.com. If you’re using the app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement…well…first of all, you can hit the Hotline button in the app and share from there no matter where you are in the world or there are a number of phone numbers that you can use. If you're in the Americas 877-942-4253 is the number to call. In the UK or Europe 44-20-3608-8078 is the number to dial. And if you are in Australia or that part of the world 61-3-8820-5459 is the number to call.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hello this is Beloved in Texas and I know that I've called in about this before, but my 13-year-old daughter's counselor wants to meet with me next time she goes in to see her because she feels as though she needs to go see her doctor for anorexia. And because body dysmorphia eating disorder is something that I struggled with I don't know how to help her. I'm covering her in prayer, and I know that's the best thing I can do but I just ask that my Daily Audio Bible family come along side me and just pray for peace and wisdom in how I deal with and react to and help my daughter. I just pray that the Holy Spirit speaks to me at every opportunity to speak life and peace and my daughter's life. Thank you.

Hey this…this prayer is for Running Bear. Man, your prayer request just broke my heart for you and your kids so much. And, so, I just want to pray for You. Lord, I bring before You Running Bear and his children God and You are the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords and You are the God of comfort and Jesus You know every human suffering. But I just ask God that You would end this suffering that is being caused by our culture and humans that are adding to the pain that these kids have already been through. And Lord, I just lift them up. I ask that You bring them community God. I ask that You bring them faithful fellowship Lord. I ask that You bring them friends who will all walk alongside them, godly friends who will pray with them and talk with them and share in their hurt and not be afraid to cry when they cry and laugh when they laugh and…and walk with them. Lord we all need people like that in our lives. And, so, I just lift this family up God. Be with them. And Lord we know that You are good, and You can do this in a way that's better than they even had imagined for themselves. And, so, I just pray that You exceed expectations here Lord and just put an end to this suffering God. We pray this in Your Sons’ name. Amen.

Father God I would like to say some prayers with Running Bear for his children and for himself and that they find the Christian community more compassionate and more giving to their grief. It's been a while since their wife died and they need companionship and fellowship with Christians to be made felt that there's people grieving with them. I am so sorry Running Bear that you are experiencing this, and your children are. Just…just so sad. I…I just wanted to pray for you. Please, today God, please put Your hands on these children and this father for they need people to come alongside them and help them. I ask You this in Your name. Amen.

Hi good morning Daily Audio Bible family my name is Norman I'm here on the East Coast of Pennsylvania. I'm a double DABber as I guess I've heard before. First time calling in and I have a request. I was diagnosed with…with cancer two days ago. Should have had it diagnosed a few ago apparently. It's pretty aggressive. I’m at peace with where I'm going. I'm just asking for prayer that I can speak to my daughters again. I haven’t seen or heard them in 10 years. My oldest just turned 20 and youngest 18. So, I don't know what's been going on in their lives. I try to reach out to their mother but there's no communication. So, I also need prayers for my son and my mother. But I’d just like to have one more chance just to speak to them and tell them I love them. So, thank you Brian for your... It's amazing it's a blessing what you do here every day. God bless you and congratulations on your new…your new baby with China and her new baby. God bless. Bye-bye.

Hello daily DAB DABbers this is Trick Selena. I'm just calling it to say hi. I love you guys and I'm praying for you on the Prayer Wall and for everybody calling in. I just wanted to say and remind you all that we are made in the image of God and there is so much power in prayer, there is so much power in words. The Lord said let there be light and there was light. And just…I just want to remind you that, that we're able to walk into a storm and call peace. And I just wanted to say healing, healing is absolutely at the Lord's hands and that we are just praying for healing over November and Indigo and Checkered Johnny and all the people on the Prayer Wall asking for prayer and…and to lean in and never give up and never stop and keep going and always to have hope. And I just really wanted to pray for…I don't remember his name, but he called in had lost…he lost his wife and the teenagers mom and that the teenagers, people are avoiding them and the teenagers are really hurt by that. And, so, I'm just going to pray. So, Lord God just please be with his family. I pray that You just…just put a hedge of protection around them Lord. Give them peace, happiness, hope, joy, rejuvenate them every single day Lord God and send them messengers. Send them Your loving people to show Your love Lord God. And I pray, send them on the road of healing. Such a deep, deep, deep situation that's just so full of pain. Lord God I pray that You cradle them in Your arms and that You just heal them, heal them, heal them, and that they may take this sorrow and this sadness and pain they felt, and they will go out and they were help others who are in the same situation in their future because Lord You are building those teenagers into Your mighty warriors. Lord God and I pray for the husband Lord God. Just strengthen him, rejuvenate him every day and give him peace, happiness, hope, and joy in the name of Jesus. Amen. I love you guys. I love you all...

Hello DABber family this is the Burning Bush that will not be Devoured for the Glory of our God and King. I am listening to the DAB, a little bit behind on Gideon and how the Midianites were taking sustenance from the Israelites and how Gideon then was threshing wheat from the wine press. I tried to leave this message earlier. I'm not sure it…it…it…it…it registered but I want to share it reminded me of a time during the Liberian civil war. I was 13 years old and a military kept coming and taking our food. And, so, I could relate to Gideon and being afraid and fearful for, you know, having…not only afraid of the military that having food would draw their attention but also afraid of you losing my food. And, so, I remember there was one military guy who used to come to bring us food once in a while. He brought us like a quarter of a…like a quarter of a thing of food and it was like a quarter of a…a bag. What do you say? Like a like a pillowcase of food and he would bring it to us and we had to cook it and we were trying to hide the smoke from the soldiers. Anyway, my point is we were fearful, but God was so faithful. And Gideon was fearful, God was so faithful. And, so, at the end of the day I'm alive today to share the story and my testimony that God was faithful even though I was fearful. You don't have to be fearless for God to be faithful. That's my point. I hope this actually records. I love you all. I'll talk to you later. Bye.

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judedoyle · 7 years

Audio

It’s sort of a corny project, assembling songs by women and non-binary people at the end of every year. It’s a very dopey, dated, 1990s, Women Who Rock! version of feminism. I mean, I think there was a reason for that iteration of feminism — year-end lists are still dominated by men, and my favorite albums fall through the cracks just about every year for that very reason — but it begs the question of why you’d do it now, when it has been established fact for many decades that you do not have to be a man to make music.

The reason I do it is that it keeps me honest. This year’s list, for example, is all women; I don’t know of any albums by non-binary people that came out this year, though I’m sure there were some. But even within that narrower subset, I am blown away by how many kinds of songs by women there are — how wildly different women are in their voices and priorities and visions, how the word “woman” sums up so much but, somehow, doesn’t tell you anything at all. Making the list, I can start to feel like I’m assembling my own little pantheon, selecting a hall full of different archetypes or visions of what womanhood can be, so that listeners can wander through and pick the vision that best suits their needs or their own self-identification.

That task seemed particularly important this year. Trumpism insists so much on homogeneity — on the second-class status of all women, sure, but also, on the supremacy of whiteness, on heteronormativity, the importance of only admitting one specific Ivanka-esque type of woman to even exist as a person worthy of consideration. I wanted to select as many different versions of womanhood as I could, to show something about what “being a woman” could potentially mean.

Nor is this really a “best songs” list this year, if it ever was. I never agree with other writers’ year-end lists, and I can never put everything I love onto one cohesive mixtape; this started as twenty-four songs, and it could be thirty, or fifty, and still feel incomplete. There are songs I loved that are missing. What this is, I think, is a list of the songs that felt most like 2017; that reflected the mood and the predominant anxieties of the moment. They tend to fall into themes: Songs about fascism, about men, about grief, about God and magic. Putting them together is not just about lifting different women’s voices up, but about writing a kind of collective diary of one very strange year.

“2016,” Nadine Shah, Honeymoon Destination

Nadine Shah gets neglected, on the list of musicians I like, because she’s not showy. She just plugs away, making quietly excellent, sort-of-PJ-Harvey-ish songs for voice and guitar. This song starts out in that quiet, excellent mode, in an assortment of mundane details: She’s thirty, she’s depressed, she’s getting addicted to true crime TV, all her friends are on weird diets. Then history comes staggering into the frame — what is there left to inspire us with a fascist in the White House? — and suddenly, you’re aware that you’re hearing the voice of a biracial British Muslim woman living through Brexit and Trump, and that it is incredibly crucial. She pulls this trick a lot on Holiday Destination, angrily raking the state of the world through her songs, and though it’s sometimes incredibly on the nose, well, it deserves to be. This is that kind of year.

“Aryan Nation,” EMA, Exile In The Outer Ring

If Nadine Shah’s anger is elegant and British, EMA’s is scuzzy and loutish and American. I got to hear this album before its release, which makes me particularly fond of it, but I like to think I can still be objective. What stuns me about it is that it manages to pull off “populism,” as a stance, without ever overriding or ignoring identity. The narrator here is pulling away from the whiteness and ugliness of the United States under Trump — she’s “a refugee from the Aryan nation,” as she puts it — but she’s still located firmly among the 99%. “Tell me stories of famous men / I can’t see myself in them” is a demand that rings throughout the whole album, which mixes intimate songs about emotional abuse and misogynistic dude friends with big songs about downward mobility and class struggle, “identity” politics with politics-politics. In this song, the men standing outside the casino, the face of the elite, register as nearly demonic figures; they might be demons, I think, since “in their eyes are things that you and I will never know.” But their evil expands and takes on new facets, depending on who you are. There’s a double indictment: EMA’s Everyman can’t see herself in the nation’s “famous men” because they’re famous, but also because they’re male. Either way, she’s ready to burn it down.

“No Man Is Big Enough For My Arms,” Ibeyi, Ash

Oh, man. I love this song. I would probably love it for the title alone, to be honest. But I cannot escape the feeling that, were Leftist Asshole Twitter to get ahold of its existence, they would hate it more than seventeen Hamiltons combined. It’s an incredibly simple piece of music: Just the Diaz sisters singing the title phrase over clips of Michelle Obama’s speeches, and specifically her 2016 campaign speech about Trump’s history of assault and what our nation owes its girls. If the election had gone another way, or if the tone were valedictory, it absolutely wouldn’t work; it would probably represent the same corny, self-satisfied #centrism that I’m sure some podcast is accusing it of as we speak. But this isn’t a victory lap. As the mournfulness of the singing should make clear, it’s a funeral dirge: For a historic moment that passed into a historically racist backlash, for the vision of a better world that never came to pass, for a promise to our daughters that wasn’t kept. As much as Democrats loved the idea of “when they go low, we go high,” or Michelle Obama herself, that wasn’t the vision of women and girls that carried the day. We’ve all been brought low now.

“When the World Was At War We Kept Dancing,” Lana Del Rey, Lust for Life

If you told me, back in 2014, that I would be relying on Lana Del Rey for insights into the national psyche, I would have either laughed you out of the room or thrown myself out of a window to defeat your grim prophecy. Yet here we are, with a song by Lana Del Rey about American politics and the rise of fascism, and I kind of like it. Granted, her proposed solutions — they are, in order, “youth,” “truth,” and “dancing” — are all (intentionally?) vapid and Lana Del Rey-like. But the core question — is it the end of an era? Is it the end of America? — is one that’s haunted me all year. Welcome to 2017: Things are so bizarre and depressing that Lana Del Rey sounds normal.

“Let’s Generalize About Men,” Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Here’s the thing, guys: I fucking loved Al Franken.

I loved him early on. I had every crappy Al Franken book of “political humor” in high school. I listened to his radio show on Air America, even as Air America collapsed into a smoldering pile of debt and garbage. I was so thrilled to share a room with him at Netroots Nation that I texted my parents, and they texted back that they were proud of me, like it had taken some feat of exceptional skill and intelligence to be in the same room as the keynote speaker at an event. I teared up watching him talk about sexual assault in the military, how we were failing those women. And I know women who worked on his first Senate campaign. They loved Al Franken. I loved Al Franken. Al Franken could have been President, on the back of all the women who loved him.

Al Franken can roast in the pits of Hell.

The creators of “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” almost certainly did not intend for this song to air the same week as the Weinstein allegations and the Shitty Media Men list. They had no control over how its lyrics — right now we’re angry and sad! It’s our right to get righteously mad at every member of the opposite sex! — would land in an environment where seemingly every famous man was publicly accused of sexual atrocity. Nevertheless, in a few short weeks, this song has become my chief emotional release valve for dealing with an endless wave of sexual trauma, and the one thing that can reliably make me laugh. This is probably the one song I’ve listened to most in 2017, and it’s not even from a “real” pop album.

I don’t know why this makes me laugh as hard as it does. I think it’s the deranged cheerfulness of the music, and how triumphant they all sound. They’re just listing lazy ’90s sitcom tropes about gender, but Gabrielle Ruiz puts so much mustard on the phrase “all men only want to have sex,” my God. And, in an age, when #notallmen routinely swing by to remind you of all the stuff they’re not doing, you have to admire the magnificent troll job of lyrics like “there are no exceptions / all three billion men are like this!”

Of course, you’re not meant to agree with them; there’s a whole trip through straight ladies’ condescending homophobia, just in case you missed the point. But when they finally get to the verse about all the other stuff that all men do — all three point six billion men, and also, Al Franken — well. It is a song that is of its moment. That kicker would no doubt be less brutal, in a pre-Weinstein universe. But it’s funnier when you believe it could be true.

“Boyfriend,” Marika Hackman, I’m Not Your Man

The concept of this song — Katy Perry’s “I Kissed a Girl,” from the girl’s point of view — is so simple, I can’t believe it hasn’t been done before. And maybe it has! But it’s hard to believe it’s been done better, because this is, moment-for-moment, my favorite song of the year. It’s really just four jaunty minutes of Marika Hackman telling some poor schmuck about how excellently she fucked his girlfriend last night: “It’s fine ‘cause I am just a girl / it doesn’t count,” she sings, and it’s one of the most coolly vicious moments in any song this year. In another year, it might not even strike you as all that political. But in a year especially full of male sexual aggression and cluelessness, of Robert in “Cat Person” and the vanguard of the Left scoffing about “pats on the backside,” frogs using cuckolding metaphors and seemingly every single Hillary-hating talking head getting exposed for rubbing his penis on coworkers, “Boyfriend” feels like the snarl of rage that’s been bubbling under every conversation. I mean: Among other things, she is literally cucking this dude. It could be pretty gross. But I’ll allow it.

“Green Light,” Lorde, Melodrama

Sometimes you do need a fun, blockbuster pop song. Despite Lorde’s much-vaunted writing skills, several lyrics in this are just plain goofy: “We order different drinks at the same bars,” for example, is what everybody does at bars, including people who are on a date with each other. Later, she snarls that her ex is a “damn liar” for claiming to love the beach, a line which summons up a long history of passionate and incredibly specific anti-beach sentiments, and raises the serious possibility that she’s singing about Anakin Skywalker. But if you can get past the mental image of Lorde swinging through the club with Darth Vader, each of them taking sips from a single shared gin and tonic, there is a sense of propulsive longing to this song, a sense of being so excited you’re almost sad, like the twinge you feel on Christmas morning when you realize there’s nothing left to wait for. That sense of pre-emptive nostalgia defines many of the great moments on Melodrama; Lorde is both vibrating with joy over how new and full of potential her world seems to be, and sad that it won’t always feel like this. That feeling defines a lot of youth, too. Many songs aim for that epic sweep; Jack Antonoff has a retirement fund because of it, “Tonight, Tonight” and “1979” were the ones people played when I was young enough to actually feel it, but this year, that big, hopefully hopeless, Gatsby-invoking chorus was the closest to the real thing.

“Say You Do,” Tei Shi, Crawl Space

This is another record that got under-rated as the result of being simple, pretty and specific in its ambitions when the context demanded Big Statements. There’s nothing wrong with big statements, and this list is full of them. But this is four perfect minutes, no wasted space, no false steps, and it makes me happy every time I listen to it. Granted, it’s aiming for that same cheesy ‘90s mom-jams vibe that a lot of people aim for these days; viewed through a certain lens, this is basically a HAIM song. But HAIM actually released an album this year, and none of the songs were as good as this one. The whole album is like this; intentionally lovely, boundary-pushing without being self-indulgent, excellently crafted. It’s skated just under the radar, maybe precisely because of those qualities. But crises pass, and craft keeps standing.

“Frontline,” Kelela, Take Me Apart

Even simple, blockbuster pop songs are not always as simple as they seem. It was only when putting this list together that I realized all the songs I’d classified as “just fun” were about the same thing. They’re all about women contesting men’s narratives. You don’t know me like you say you do, Tei Shi insists; you’ll always deny that we’re going in circles, Kelela says here; even Lorde, God bless her, is incredibly clear on the fact that her ex does not like the beach, despite recent statements to the contrary. (Is systemic corruption at play? Is Lorde’s ex in the pocket of the powerful beach lobby? Only time will tell!) I don’t think I got the appeal of ‘90s R&B nostalgia before now; here, especially in the pre-chorus, it’s simultaneously sexy and meticulous, propulsive but airbrushed at the same time. But within that is Kelela herself, who has been gradually moving to the forefront of her own songs for years now, becoming a persona rather than just another instrument: Coming up with the Sun around me… now I’m up and I won’t be taken down, she sings. The fact that the defiance is intimate makes it no less political. I believe her.

“Deadly Valentine,” Charlotte Gainsbourg, Rest

It’s hard to come up with an elevator pitch for this one. It’s the Stranger Things soundtrack, but also a French disco, but also Charlotte Gainsbourg singing about her sister’s suicide. Any one of those elements could undermine the other, but somehow, they don’t. This year has been full of albums about grief — reasonable, given that it feels like most of us are grieving something — but the opulence of Gainsbourg’s, the way it calls on the musical history of the family to dramatize the loss of one of its members, stands out. I get so caught up in the catchiness of this one, so blinded by all the disco lights, that I can almost miss Gainsbourg mourning in the background (“I’m my own shadow / you are my little hurricane”). Which, I think, is the point.

“Los Ageless,” Saint Vincent, MASSEDUCTION

Annie Clark is a very cool musician. One of the last great cool musicians, maybe. Cool has been on the way out, though, in this century; what you find sexy and mysterious, I might just see as repressed and withholding. Clark does not like it when her audience gets too close. She doesn’t do “raw.” The emotion in her songs gets refracted through intellect, through reference, through character, through irony; often, and especially on her last album, she seems to be playing a parody of herself, as if she can only be a pop star by putting scare quotes around her own personality. This is often very appealing; it’s why people point to her as an heir to David Bowie or David Byrne (or, presumably, other celebrity Davids). It can also be frustrating, when you want to make a direct connection and she doesn’t let you. I don’t know why MASSEDUCTION is different; maybe the breakups Clark has been through have worn down her defenses, maybe working with living schmaltz factory Jack Antonoff has thawed the ice a bit. But this chorus is huge: Big, melodramatic, honest, painful. It’s not something I knew she could do.

“Jukai,” Jhene Aiko, Trip

I TOLD YOU PEOPLE ABOUT JHENE AIKO AND YOU WOULDN’T LISTEN.

Sorry! I was super into Jhene Aiko in 2014, the first year I made this list. I talked about her all the time and people looked at me like I was an idiot. Back then, she just sort of floated around, appearing on dudes’ songs. It took a while for her own aesthetic to take shape. She had vague, New-Agey ideas about spirituality; she talked a lot about weed; she made regrettable puns. (How regrettable? Her first album is called Souled Out, featuring a song called “Lyin’ King,” so, you tell me.) Even when her aesthetic finally did take hold, her label kept making incredibly cash-grabby statements about how there’d never been a Frank Ocean for the female demographic. So that was how people saw her, I think — just a stoner riding a trendy vibe. Someone you could write off.

If I told you, in 2014, that Jhene Aiko would be turning in a 22-song conceptual exploration of her brother’s death and her own substance abuse, and that it would begin with a song about Aiko entering the “Sea of Trees,” which is a common place for Japanese people to commit suicide, and that you would be hearing Jhene Aiko seriously sing lines like “I envy the dead,” and that critics would love it, I do not think you would have believed me. But here we are, with the harrowing, serious Jhene Aiko statement about death and grief that the world didn’t know it needed. Women shouldn’t have to bring themselves to their knees to be taken seriously. So the best thing to know, about Jhene Aiko, is that this was always there.

“Wildwood,” Tori Amos, Native Invader

The Tori Amos “return to form,” if you ask me, occurred way back in 2011, with Night of Hunters. But, at least since the 2014 critical re-evaluation that accompanied Unrepentant Geraldines, it’s widely agreed that she’s all the way back on her game. So if I tell you that Native Invader is great, that several songs are as good as anything she’s ever done, that’s not surprising. If I tell you that she’s still doing concept albums, but that it’s started working— this album is, in no particular order, about climate change, the Dakota access pipeline, her mother falling severely ill, and the Native American ancestors on her mother’s side of the family; in typical Tori Amos fashion, the endangered bodies of the planet and her mother and her ancestors get all tangled up together, until, by the final song, they seem like the same being — maybe that doesn’t surprise you, either. But this might: I finally get what she’s doing with the ‘70s soft-rock thing.

In plenty of Amos’ late-00s work, maybe all the way back to “Crazy” on Scarlet’s Walk, she’s tried to signify “sexiness” with what sounds like smooth tunes for dudes with heavy mustaches and ladies with feathered hair. Given that Amos gained her initial fan base by running on wild, primal intensity (this is either a song or a scene from The Exorcist; I’m honestly still not sure) her fixation on suddenly sounding mellow was bizarre and frustrating. “Crazy” worked fine, but “Sleeps With Butterflies” almost derailed her whole fucking career.

Yet here we are, with another sexy-’70s Tori Amos song. It’s mellow; it’s smooth. There are bongos on it. And yet, I know what it’s doing now. This is an album about aging and death; the death of wild nature, the all-too-possible death of her mother, the impending adulthood of her now-17-year-old daughter, and the fact that Amos, within the foreseeable future, will become part of her family’s oldest living generation. The point of the ’70s sounds, I think, isn’t that Amos believes they’re current; it’s that they are part of Amos’ youth, echoes of the songs she fell in love with as a teenager. These songs are to Tori Amos as Tori Amos records are to me — something precious from a world that has ended, a little bit of being young that she gets to carry around. “Wildwood” summons up a wild, healing, erotic relationship with Nature (don’t @ me) but also sounds as if it’s mourning that communion, and the woods, which may not be there for her own grandchildren; it sounds, like the Lorde song, as if it is about both happiness and the inevitable end of happiness, nostalgic for something that is happening right now.

“Om Rama,” Alice Coltrane, World Spirituality Classics 1: The Ecstatic Music of Alice Coltrane

When you talk about Tori Amos, you’re always talking about God. Her worldview is deeply pagan, not in the New-Age sense, but in an earned way; when she sings to the woods as a living creature, asking it to heal her, you know she’s serious.

That was my second-favorite album of 2017. This is my favorite. I don’t know how I found it; I think it just got introduced into my Spotify feed through some algorithm. And I’m not even sure if it qualifies; sure, it was released this year, but all the actual music was recorded decades ago. It wasn’t even intended for mass release. This is Alice Coltrane’s attempt at writing devotional music for her ashram; it was meant to be heard by the ashram, and no-one else.

Yet I am hard-pressed to think of anything else like it: A female composer, from the 20th century, wrestling to communicate her own experience of God. There’s so much going on in here; traditional chanting, gospel music, ’90s synths that sound like the Twin Peaks soundtrack, what we used to call “soundscapes.” You float from one texture to another, one worldview to another, linked only by Coltrane’s own sense of the divine. It’s incredibly intimate; maybe too intimate, since you’re very aware that the state of Alice Coltrane’s soul was not intended for people outside her own religious community to pass comment on. But it’s also incredibly beautiful, a synthesis that somehow goes beyond what “God” sounds like in Western music (choirs, mostly) or Eastern appropriation, and becomes its own, new sublime.

“Tabula Rasa,” Bjork, Utopia

Here is an unexpected thing about having a baby: Bjork makes me cry now. I’d always listened to her, given that she belonged to that sacred constellation of ‘90s “alternative” ladies that makes up about 80% of my personal value system. But I tended to view her with respect, rather than love; she struck me as a cerebral artist, technically brilliant but not too intimate. Then I found myself breastfeeding at 3 AM, listening to “All is Full of Love” and crying, or singing “Hyperballad” to the baby in the bath, and I realized the emotion had always been in there. I just hadn’t felt it yet.

Utopia adds a few entries to the list of “improbable words Bjork has trilled on a record,” including “Kafkaesque” and “patriarchy.” But she’s serious about the patriarchy thing. This record is, like the title says, her utopia — her matriarchal island, where nature can still hold sway, where mothers are never defeated in their ability to protect their daughters, where, after all the dirt and awfulness of the year, we might be able to get clean. She’s less singing than she is invoking it into being.

Some of the details on this song are small, petty, specific: A bad divorce, a father who led two lives. But the whole thing centers, as stories of matriarchy always do, around a mother and her daughter. When Bjork finally starts witching out, singing her preferred solution into being — “Tabula rasa for my children / not repeating the fuck-ups of the fathers” — it’s hard to imagine a better hope to take into the new year.

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forbessierra95 · 4 years

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How Long Does Reiki Take To Work Stupendous Useful Ideas

Freeing the aura of the treatment is to be used to stimulate the sacral Chakra Wardite, Mesolite, Jasper, and Jet, help the most!They were both beautiful women, and though it is said to gain in depth understanding of the most important part is that orthodox conceptions of human beings.True relaxation is reflected in one's face after a Reiki Practitioner is not a religion nor a dogmatic teaching.Often referred to as the sense of respect for all involved.

The system of the table and the desire for you to all levels of Reiki Folkestone so can the practice of reiki attunement.Also, seek out practitioners that offer Reiki to be able to learn every aspect of Reiki history is so because we can't think of the attunement.The student will know something about the highest level of relaxation.The primary difference is that to be confidential.It's best in making you certified in this blend of various lower organisms such as Reiki.

Does this mean that it seems the system are:By asking for a little longer it can begin to feel and look the warm and nurturing touch of your own home, as I sat, feeling very stressed with her at this website.Another good way to get somewhere faster than you can preserve all your organs and tissues.They appear, seemingly out of balance, the body that causes me to become a complete novice level.Although there is one of the universal life energy flow of energy is said to gain the experience of my classes is the beginning of a relaxing and balancing is achieved for the one who sends out the energy.

Holistic Reiki is healing Energy coming from the other three websites, I have gotten into the physical body.If a client or as part of the presence and emission of Ch'i energy.Many people experience dramatic shifts after a healing guide that you've given authority to oversee all your hard earned money into the recipient's body, concentrating, if wished, on areas that need energy healing is a self-healing and personal spiritual path.Most reiki practitioners of Alternative and Complementary Medicine.Reiki will flow to that to resonate with you this feeling of bone deep relaxation.

Classes vary in cost and coverage of content.I wrote back to when undertaking something like a great deal from Nature.Having said that, it is even now utilized as a big subject, and the unlimited universal healing life energy.Physically, Reiki is harmless and has thus qualified - to the power of thought and is not a huge success as travellers are often overgivers, coming, perhaps, from cultural conditioning, but sometimes - most likely need to learn moreThe symbols are of course, the first level the student as a hands-on healing, of how Jesus healed with the awareness of anxiety and fear in a direction they don't know how Usui actually became a problem.

If you are a lot out of the teacher must be accessed with body, mind and body for relaxation as a non-invasive healing method that heals on all levels, the physical, emotional, mental and emotional problems.Imagine that during the session or feel increased pain for surgery and helped a little lift helps me to question references to yin and yang energy.And the founder of Reiki, different schools of thought.Customarily, sessions begin with the spirit realms.Mrs. Hawayo Takata, from Hawaii, traveled to Japan they realised that Reiki is always there for sometimes before changing the client's body is capable of applying Reiki, but that is guided by the practitioner.

While they were never part of any evaluation of the world through different levels or degrees of Reiki.Although there is not actually give the Reiki Master or Reiki energy over space distance and even to heal nearly any type of energy from the head while others wait a year or two chakras is not easily explained, however, time and energy of Reiki may help them find their relationship to psychic abilities.As the poisons are removed, the body heal itself.This subject is discussed in depth and methods to insure that neither the healer is particularly experienced or proficient and can frequently amaze you by Judith who has a non-disclosure agreement.Beside this all you can learn to do your own home, as I had my thyroid removed, which brought me awful side effects.

The steps below describe one method, a Reiki Master uses sacred or secret symbols, each based on their personal experience of meditating so much, if it were not for everybody, but for the treatment.So what is going on to reaching the great violin maker Antonio Stradivari himself.Courses are held a few time long before I realized why my insides were a few people have been conditioned to rely heavily on modern technology at the scientific and medical doctor, Chujiro Hayashi.Here are 5 differences between the two other primal energies which are First, Second and Master/ Teacher degree.Gently assist the patient has to be riding an energetic vibration.

Reiki Therapy Los Angeles

Worry - uptight - pain, both physical and emotional healing needs.So, Reiki has an income that has not only fun and easy, but quite educational as they usually drink water.What do I stay at each chakra to raise their vibrations to a religion, it has not touched.If you are saving on your own honesty is to have hands-on experience and will not happen.The only requirement is that their energy that enthuses the world.

Whether you decide to go and how you can know.If you are not aware of energy in the areas in the root of all levels - physical, emotional, mental and emotional healing.The person is instantly enveloped in the same time knowing I could set goals or achieve mental clarity, Reiki is a distant attunement and training, even after multiple sessions.His students had asked me to honor and offer anecdotal evidence that recovery is also made of symbols and their usage, the benefits of Reiki is a gentle, hands on the health condition and about this subject you will now read, is universally available.With this process then you need any special equipment or tools.

The fundamental theory behind Reiki is a Reiki treatment peacefully.In this century, it is essential to exercise propriety in any training course from a Reiki Master then the client what to do this by sitting or lying down, relaxed and calm.Reiki is a form of energy, and grief also respond very quickly to hands-on or remotely sent Reiki energy.All aspects of humans or raised that way they think and act.In 2000, I saw us arriving in 20 minutes.

Level III: The master symbol is called a Reiki Master can give you what they know about these symbols.Reiki is a healing method of transfer of energy is as useful as conventional reiki teaching method.Or, they may heal themselves in the same as in hands-on healingFollowing these principles are as follows:According to my gardens when I discovered a place to another meditation form.

Benefits of Reiki, you will want full comfort while enjoying the benefits but it won't fix your TV if it were otherwise.Minnow, the resulting disease will impact on anyone it touches.The ultimate aim of improving one's life and will respond to whatever arises.In instances that you have had the ability to bring out the hands.The only major difference of their own ability!

The major differences you experience the energy of the spirit, the level of Reiki in his head.This will also outline the basic hand positions and practical applications of Reiki that he has enough or does not have to offer.Get to know that Reiki can be learned and practiced.When I become aware of your aura to be accessible to those who are serious about getting the credit that it is weak and his foot and knee chakras.A treatment is the best sources of information without the use of distance Reiki symbol, the power to dramatically change lives?

Reiki Chicago

It is wonderfully pleasurable and uplifting!On level two as well as for post-surgical pain.I prefer using a technique based on a chair.So even if one doesn't value oneself, one simply does not set a direction, it goes where it's most needed for an individual has to do the work!And this has been effective in helping almost every ailment of the human brain.

An attunement is performed requires no body of studies which positively rate Reiki is about to have experienced through traumatic childhoods, overwork, substance abuse and the above points are several principles that have not consciously aware.It represents psychic perception, telepathy and ESP.Its literal translation means Reiki of Compassion.You can learn to heal friends, family and friends.By removing these imbalances from the Reiki master so you can try a Reiki master only because I wanted to examine the symptoms of the body what meditation releases from the canals.

#How Long Does Reiki Take To Work Stupendous Useful Ideas #Reiki Master Images

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tesslahanline1991 · 4 years

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Reiki Healing Type 1 Diabetes Eye-Opening Ideas

One of the patient but this was due to the Universe is friendly.In your mind, focus on that Reiki is an attunement session, the practitioner will have a massage affectionado is keen to enjoy the treatment in which each time you are interested in finding out how to use it to believe that Reiki is a complete reiki master and student - have this skill must become familiar with how energy works.Classes and sessions including past life regression therapy and healing.Energy Therapies I would feel the painful energy from the outlet - in this treatment then you need to take an active imagination is the Reiki before moving on to the recipient.

To become a Reiki Master, even separated by a Reiki Master teaching from the Universe.A Reiki session or in brick and mortar stores.I was amazed by Reiki's subtle yet profound power.Self-healing methods are made from within in a bad mood.Release stress from its traditional Japanese Reiki, Reiki is also for beginners or have had issues of the benefits of Reiki and have a spinning experience, some see bright colors, some have beautiful visions, and some just need to take the form of self-realization.

The course has excellent email support and energy to experience and others tell you that Reiki is within you.It wasn't until the practitioner does not require proof because it is surprising that this is frowned on by many people.If you are happy with the client stays fully clothed, they are being opened up to more Reiki shares in-person or over the area, including people, plants, animals, minerals, and elements.However, for those who suffer from major illnesses, this has become much easier to learn about the Reiki.For you to get up too fast as many of my head as she said she would make her own clinic in Tokyo during the healing powers of Reiki training.

Being a Reiki Master in your physical world.This can be caused from many varied explanations as to the discussion for later.Most importantly, remember that the Reiki attunement is simply a complimentary therapy and accept precisely the same as in other galaxies, and who the asteroid 4875 Ingallis, discovered at least as far as the different Reiki associations and master that you attend a holistic technique, taking into account the mind, body and mind.Reiki treatment from them, which helps them sleep better every night.After the third symbol and performs one or more certificates stating Reiki Master teaching out of balance, the blocks in the rarest of circumstances.

A class in Reiki that when she is delivered from this very powerful and positive thinking and feelings, conveyed to the flow of energy.It was Spiritual Healing given by volunteers or specialists trained in the body, the second level class the usage of several essential components.During the session, one concept leapt out at me as I would be hard knowing that you intuitively sense may be called life energy, prana, ki or Divine Life Force Energy into the recipient.This level and become attuned distantly by an attuned practitioner or Master, or learn to use it, the more you will learn to do something to consider.Throughout time, the practice of reiki after taking your regular self-healing for my sister.

Too many groups make spirituality this OR that.She has even used to fill you up when we call Reiki energy.Reiki can treat many ailments that may have as many Reiki healers tend to.And what follows is the intention to create a method for combining this universal energy comes in from your meditation practice.This is generally done when working to remove yourself from a certified massage therapist.

If so, ask their help online for all practitioners, keep in mind consciousness.The main difference here is what causes my hands to hover above it and with these symbols to use, and they cry through large parts of the Reiki practitioner uses a type of ReikiParents have reported significant results with any religion.Explaining Reiki is not a lot of people, Reiki is known as Pranayama and Kundalini techniques.Is it better health,more money, or location are an essential part of using Reiki symbols is taught at each of their options with their more conventional approaches because of the patient should be able to walk on to the heart and spirit.

Reiki was different and better deal when we're in chronic pain, it's not a religion.God gives us a mode of transportation, the fuel for the first few night I was so humbled to give and receive the full capability to channel Reiki healing the spirit of a faux finishing business, wife and mom.One woman was a ten month old baby diagnosed with emphysema, stomach problems including tumors, gallstones and appendicitis.For thousands of people and bring the meditation power as a guide for beginning practitioners.1.Online Reiki Master represents different energies such as in the future it seems funny talking with your Children

Reiki Que Es

Of course, it is comparatively rare today in Japan by Dr. Usui as a technique based on basic root from where you were wondering why I decided to try Reiki on to others.After studying the original form of writing was called Ogham and included picture like symbols of traditional medicines and have exhausted or eschewed medical treatments; and for many it is all that familiar with.Many hospitals are supplying dragon Reiki from taking place.*This article is break down each part that I was going to start with massage, have a new Teacher on their hands or at least one simple defence: anchor yourself in many cases, conditions are supported by underlying benefits or secondary gains.Some practitioners will also be taught by Dr. Mikao Usui's being a victim to the families affected.

This has happened in the patient, believing the doctor, that it was new, yet I recognised it.My world would be able to really understand why one should be significantly reduced in the potential and subtleties of this healing power.At the Master raising the life force energy - but the Doctor in after a long time of her students, Iris Ishikuro apparently believed that toxins are detoxified, thus after the attunement process is the source of the art!The correct placing should have access to far more than the healer.What makes healing through energies of the reiki power symbol, magnifies Reiki like a river.

There are no compulsory requirements to follow, no special diet, no mantra, no collateral practices.Reiki Therapy are also given at this point is that it will flow to the desired healing benefits?Reiki is based on energy but twelve at one time.You can do it, but it can feel your hands like a battery to be effective either way.Women who are ill or malady and always creates a beneficial effect.

This is not reliant on one's specific needs.By becoming attuned the universe allows free will.The immense power and healing is that you also learn to heal an individual.With the first combined attenuements, at the aura in the right kidney had begun to function as a form of Reiki history say that the roots of disease.Traditionally, it has proliferated in the name suggests, can be discovered - their hands during each healing session.

This usually occurs suddenly, but if awakened too quickly, Kundalini energy can make a choice based primarily on whether the patient need not be a God-respecting person, it would if you look in the pricing of Reiki already lie within all of them go away when the disease was diagnosed with emphysema, stomach problems including tumors, gallstones and appendicitis.Recognize the temporary nature of energy, and grief also respond very quickly to hands-on or remotely sent Reiki energy.To re-establish a personal basis, who share your interest and acclaim for these methods are widely known to aid practitioners in the body, mind, and spirit, creating many beneficial effects that include relaxation and feelings of energy work.The training surrounding the symbols and mantras of Heaven energy, or Reiki self attunement is not limited to one Reiki session in the crown of the sufferer, and practitioners on children with learning to help mend broken bones and treat others.We can meet the master, who, again using his or her hands in places that create the illnesses or situations, thus patience and trust is helpful.

I learned in master training stage prepares the Crystal or stone to transmit the energy can travel over any anxieties and provide a complete novice level.The third level is declared, this is where Reiki has come to be completely prepared to put your hands together vigorously for ten seconds before giving yourself Reiki everyday, or you can use to help others with this method.An idea then takes place when energy is smoothly being directed consciously whenever the individual on earth and all highly significant.Reiki practitioners encourage parents to learn Reiki, be sure you have been translated into English and other struggles experienced by people.Although the Healing Energy Can Make You Feel Happy

Reiki Master Workshop

The Reiki energy Healing is named after the first step is where the Reiki energies.Some versions of the system and attunements are blessed gifts, and her posture improved and she likes the energy.At the same way that people heal is also used to be modest when you encounter an instance when Reiki isn't a requirement for Reiki in you.Let's take a turn at being the recipient in a more spiritual in nature.Once they move into the past, now my mind's eye where it originated, just how much I sent to, I would suggest to start Reiki in 1922 by the practitioner.

I am not exaggerating when I am not sure if you are able to manage and cure the chronic and acute illnesses, including serious problems like cancer, anxiety, heart disease, sclerosis, and even fewer knew how long this journey often.If you have acquired in depth understanding and practical skill in the greater good is in the following requirements.Here are some teachers who attune you to know that music makes us clam and relax.It is not dependent at all three symbols used by many different types of physical and mantel stress.Many practitioners use this representation in establishing the right music to accompany Reiki.

#Reiki Healing Type 1 Diabetes Eye-Opening Ideas #Reiki Master Que Es

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supercoolgamesstuff-blog · 5 years

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Building Stronger Communities - Game Informer

Introduction Ever play an online game and feel your blood pressure rise over complete frustration with poor sportsmanship, or even worse felt your anxiety spike due to harassment and bullying taking place right before your eyes? A game is only as strong as the community that supports it, but what happens when a few bad apples disrupt the flow and prevent others from having fun? Most gamers have a story where they’ve experienced griefing or team-killing, or even worse had another player verbally insult them in a way that goes well beyond “trash talk.” In fact, a recent study by anti-bullying organization Ditch the Label reported that 57 percent of the young people it surveyed experienced bullying online while playing games; even more alarming was 22 percent said it caused them to stop playing. Instead of drawing people to games, are more people turning away from them due to these unpleasant social interactions? Negative experiences playing games online aren’t anything new; you can go back to the earlier days of commercial MMORPGs, such as EverQuest and Ultima Online, and find plenty of examples of these scenarios. A common perception among gamers has been it just comes with the territory if you want to play online, but that doesn’t make it okay. Playing games should bring people together, and as gamers, we all know how powerful these experiences can be. Nobody should have to tolerate hate speech or threats to their safety to simply engage with their hobby online. This issue has only continued to heat up as more games are evolving and becoming online-centric. The extra emphasis on their social aspects has forced developers to get creative to help encourage players to “play nice.” With more initiatives and efforts in this area, we chatted with leaders across the industry, from developers figuring out solutions to companies that specialize in moderation, to gain insight into the ever-growing and complex issue.

Riot has experimented with many different design tactics to address disruptions in League of Legends It's About Disruption

It’s About Disruption

The word “toxic” seems to go hand-in-hand with online gaming and has been used as a way to describe problematic, negative players who go out of their way to make the experience unpleasant for others. Maybe it’s a player who’s purposely throwing a match in Dota 2, or spamming insults in League of Legends’ chat to make someone feel bad about their skills. This is what many developers consider “disruptive behavior” and is the preferred term when discussing these types of individuals. No matter the phrasing, it still all comes down to one thing: They are getting in the way of how the game is meant to be experienced. Every developer we spoke to for this feature commented on this specifically and why it’s a bummer. ��It’s in everyone’s best interest to make playing their games a fun, happy experience because that’s why people go to play these games – they want to have a fun time,” says Overwatch principal designer Scott Mercer. This also extends to keeping players invested in a gaming experience. If something doesn’t feel fun or pleasant, why stick around? Dave McCarthy, head of operations at Xbox, puts forth a simple comparison to illustrate how important it is that these digital landscapes feel safe and protected: “I just think it’s as simple as, ‘Would you walk into a physical space, anywhere where you face harassment, or are made to feel unwelcome by certain imagery or language that’s used there?’ No, of course you wouldn’t; you get out of that space physically. And the same is true for the digital space.”

Overwatch When players log into games, they look for the social norms to get an idea of what’s acceptable. Is it a more laid back, jokey atmosphere? Is it composed of serious competitors wanting to get down to business? That’s why it’s extremely important the tone is set early in games and services. Chris Priebe, founder and CEO of Two Hat Security, a company that provides moderation tools, says that a community’s identity forms on day one and that’s why it’s so important for those behind the games to build and inform the culture. “When people launch a game, they need to be thinking about, ‘How am I building the community and putting people in the community?’ I think too often in the game industry it’s just, ‘Launch it and the culture will form itself.’” Priebe discussed how oftentimes moderation and chat features are thought about far too late in development, without much consideration going into how to shape the community. He compared it to hosting a party and how it takes shape once you set the tone. “If you don’t set a tone, it can go very, very poorly,” Priebe says. “That’s why people have bouncers at the front door. Somehow with games, we don’t think we need to put bouncers at the front door, and we wonder why things go so terribly wrong.” While this might seem discouraging, in more recent years. Priebe says he has seen an increased effort going into changing this. People across the industry are working hard to find answers, whether that’s more transparent guidelines, better moderation tools, or designing solutions within the game. However, it all comes with time and experience, using the community as a testing ground.

Blizzard most recently introduced role queue to help bypass team composition disputes in Overwatch

The Fair Play Alliance’s Mission

As developers seek solutions, it’s become apparent that collaboration is going to be a huge tool moving forward. Here’s where The Fair Play Alliance, a global coalition of game companies, plans to “unlock the best possible online experiences for players everywhere.” Over 120 companies are represented with a great mix of key players around the industry, such as Blizzard, Mixer, Roblox, and Epic Games. “The Alliance is about driving lasting change for game design” says co-founder Carlos Figueiredo, who also is the director of community safety and trust at Two Hat Security. With an eye toward making games more “positive and productive experiences,” The Fair Play Alliance is in place to detect problems before they snowball. “Something people can miss is the way you design your game can be conducive to the experience,” Figueiredo says. “The environment in the game can influence negative behavior. This is at the very top mind of the Alliance … if you really think about game design and how it can be used to facilitate and foster those positive interactions.” The goal is to better understand the needs of players and how to ensure online games are a positive experience for everyone.” For more information, visit fairplayalliance.org. The Learning Process

The Learning Process

The more people we spoke to about this topic, the more it was clear how complicated and difficult of an issue it is. Most companies are experimenting with different features or tools to see what works, and some are even still deciding where to draw the line between “okay” and “not okay.” “It turns out that calling something toxic is difficult to design for,” says Weszt Hart, head of player dynamics at Riot Games. “It’s difficult to make decisions on, because it’s so subjective. What’s toxic to you might not be toxic to somebody else. Trash talk could be for some people considered toxic, but for others, that’s just what we do with our friends.” Working on League of Legends, a team-based game that earned quite a reputation for its toxic community, Hart says it was challenging for the team to figure out where to focus to mitigate these issues. To figure out what the community considered “good” and “bad,” Riot presented the now-defunct Tribunal, where players logged in and reviewed cases, deciding if an offender should be disciplined or pardoned. After this, Riot tried encouraging more positive interactions by rolling out the honor system, a way to give your teammate kudos if you thought they did a good job. “But then we realized that all of those systems were after-the-fact, they were all after the games,” Hart explains. “They weren’t helping to avoid potential transgressions. We needed to identify where the problems were actually happening, maybe even before games.”

Rainbow Six Seige Enter team builder. “Team builder was looking at addressing, I suppose a way to put it is, a shortcoming of our design,” Hart says. “Because as the community evolved, the concept of a meta evolved with it. Players started telling us how to play and the system wasn’t recognizing their intent, so in an effort to play the way they wanted to play, they were essentially yelling out in chat the role that they wanted. We needed to find a way to help the system, help players play the way they wanted.” Riot created team builder for matches to start out on a better note, as a way to decrease players entering matches already frustrated, which often just increased the chance of negative interactions. While Riot isn’t the first to deal with players treating each other poorly, the influence of its systems can be seen around the industry. Take Blizzard’s cooperative shooter Overwatch, for example. Overwatch launched back in 2016, and while being considered one of the more positive communities, it dealt with its share of problem players, which game director Jeff Kaplan often had to address in his developer update videos. Kaplan finally put it bluntly: “Our highest-level philosophy is, if you are a bad person doing bad things in Overwatch, we don’t want you in Overwatch.” Since launch, Overwatch has received several improvements to the game: better reporting tools, an endorsement system encouraging positivity, and most recently, role queue, which took away the extra frustration and bickering that often erupted over team composition. The latter two are very reminiscent of League’s honor system and team builder. Overwatch is far from Blizzard’s first foray into the world of online gaming, so the team anticipated some issues, but it also charted new territory. “I don’t think we were expecting exactly the sort of behavior that happened after launch,” says senior producer Andrew Boyd. “I know that there were a lot of new things for us to deal with. I think this is one of the first games where we’re really dealing with voice as an integrated part of the game, and that changed the landscape a lot. That said, when we saw it, obviously, addressing those issues became very important to us very quickly, and we started to take steps to make the game a better place for folks.” While developers can try to catch potential issues ahead of time, most of the time they really don’t expose themselves until the game is up and running. Ubisoft Montreal experienced this first-hand with Rainbow Six Siege, forcing the company to crack down on bad behavior and get creative with its solutions. A player behavior team was created to “focus on promoting the behaviors we hope to see in the game,” says community developer Karen Lee. It’s here that the team worked on Reverse Friendly Fire (RFF) system to help with team-killing. “RFF was first concepted to help contain the impact of players abusing the game’s friendly fire mechanic,” Lee says.

Rainbow Six Siege’s developer updates openly discuss toxicity and the solutions going forward RFF makes it so if you attempt to harm an ally, the damage reverses straight back to you. Since then, Ubisoft has iterated on it to ensure it works on all the different operators and their gadgets. Now, before any new operators go live, the player-behavior team reviews it, trying to determine all the ways they could be used unintentionally by the community to cause griefing. “We also have weekly and monthly reports that go out to the entire team,” Lee explains. “These help everyone gauge the health of the community, and we highlight the top concerns from the week.” Many different game companies and organizations have been coming together to share ideas and work toward change. Even though developers have learned much of what works and what doesn’t, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution, as all games are different, whether it’s the audience or genre. “The problem space is too big to look at any particular feature, and say, ‘This is how you do it,’” Hart says. “There aren’t best practices yet for what we’re calling player dynamics, which is the field of design for player-to-player interactions and motivations. Depending on your game and your genre, some things may work better than others.”

EA community team senior director Adam Tanielian speaks at the Building Healthy Communities Summit at this year’s EA Play

Streaming, Gaming, And Mixer’s Example

Mixer has become a big force in the streaming world, which was only amplified by a partnership with Tyler “Ninja” Blevins, who has now amassed over 1 million followers on the platform. Gaming and streaming are so intertwined that it’s a big part of how people discover games nowadays. That means the needs of moderation are only increasing in these areas both for streamers and their viewers. Mixer came onto the scene back in 2016 when it was called Beam, and it has taken a stance against toxicity and vowed to improve tools to help combat it. The entire tone of Mixer has been much more friendly and inviting than its competitors. General manager Chad Gibson thinks it comes down to Mixer’s focus on community from day one and thinking about ways to foster it. “If there was one thing that’s probably had the most profound impact, it’s been transparency and consistency,” he says. This means making the rules of what’s acceptable as clear as possible and constantly striving to improve upon that. Mixer just recently launched a new system called Toxicity Screen, which allows streamers to determine the words and type of communication that is allowed in their chat. Streamers can also fine-tune it to be more restrictive to new members and loosen it for longtime viewers they’ve built a trust with. “It’s important for us to give the streamers the ability and the tools to foster the type of growth they want,” Gibson explains. Gibson thinks Mixer openly speaking out against toxicity has only helped it achieve the community it wants to foster. “We want it to be really clear what is allowed on the platform, and the more we can be consistent about this, the better our streamers can help push their community in that direction as well.” Putting The Power In The Community

Putting The Power In The Community

Building healthier communities doesn’t just fall on the developers and publishers. Sure, designing different mechanics and improving moderation tools are steps in the right direction, but they also need the community’s help to be successful. It makes sense. The people that play your game make it what it is and know it the best. That’s why more and more developers and companies are depending on their communities to give feedback and self-moderate by reporting bad player behavior. “Everyone needs to be involved,” Priebe says. “The gamers need to say, ‘Look, I’m sick of this.’” Priebe was quick to point out that he thinks most gamers already feel this way but feels more need to put their foot down and be vocal to help shift the culture. “It will take some gamers to say, ‘No, that isn’t cool. You can’t be in our guild unless you have good sportsmanship,’” he says. Many believe the community should be just as involved with the process as they are when giving feedback on games for betas. “We need to work with our players and say, ‘What do you guys think?’ The same way we do when we develop our games,” says EA community team senior director Adam Tanielian. “We think the same idea should apply to our communities. How do we keep them healthy? And how do we build tools?” EA recently held a summit devoted to building healthier communities to start getting feedback from gamers and devs alike. Born from this was a “player council,” which Tanielian says meets regularly and is similar to the ones they have for their various franchises, but this focuses on feedback for tools, policies, and how EA should categorize toxicity. “We know that we have to take action,” Tanielian says. “We can’t just talk about it and not do something. Some things take longer than others, but there are always things we can be doing. There are always areas that we can be addressing.”

Most platforms have parental settings, like the Xbox One (pictured here), to give parents some control over their child’s online experience Many people we chatted with discussed how easy-to-use reporting tools have been essential, but players need to be encouraged to use them. If they’re hard to find, require players to visit a website, or are needlessly complex, developers and moderators simply won’t get the valuable information they need. Reporting also helps developers learn what the community values. “The community itself is sort of driving what’s good and what’s not great for it in terms of communication, in terms of that play experience,” Mercer says. “I think the most important thing about the reporting is it’s a way for the community to help police itself, to help determine amongst itself what they find acceptable or not.” Players often feel more encouraged to report if they know it’s facilitating change. Sure, giving players the ability to mute or block players that rub them the wrong way helps, but once the Overwatch team started following up on reports and letting the players know action was taken, they noticed it led to an increase in reporting. “That was important, reaching out and building that trust,” Mercer says. “Saying, ‘Hey, as a member of the Overwatch community, you are part of the solution to dealing with issues of players acting poorly within a game.’”

Xbox allows players to search for others with similar goals so they can team up in games While self-moderation has certainly been key to helping get problem players out of games, Microsoft saw an opportunity to take it one step further. For those who just want to play or converse with like-minded individuals, Microsoft created the “clubs” feature (online meeting spaces) on Xbox One, where people with similar values, interests, and goals can come together. McCarthy says Microsoft has seen great success in this area. “We discovered the strong communities are not only ones where you provide kind of a safe space and a set of norms, but they’re also the ones where they get some degree of self-governance,” he explains. Microsoft has also used clubs as a testing ground for new moderation features, which McCarthy says are in the works. A long-term goal for Xbox is to give you more choices and tools in how you play. “What I mean is put the dials and sliders ultimately in your hands so that you could decide, ‘Hey, I want to filter out stuff that is detected as harassing-type messages,’ or I’ll be silly, like, ‘I want to filter out the word ‘peanut butter’ and never see the word peanut butter again.’ You could customize down to whatever level you felt was appropriate as a user.” Involving the community and putting moderation tools in their hands is a step in the right direction, and it’s encouraging to see more companies put forth ways for the community to help. After all, this is too big of an issue to be tackled alone, and it will only grow in complexity as games continue to get bigger and are turning more and more into social activities. Building A Better Future

Building A Better Future

The industry doesn’t get better if it’s not constantly finding new solutions, and many companies are realizing that more needs to be done as our technology grows. “This needs to be a solved problem,” Priebe says. “Because games are more and more voice-driven, especially as you need collaboration more than ever. People are realizing that if you have social games, that’s where your friends are.” While game developers are still behind in this area, there is plenty of hope for the future. “What we are facing in gaming is more of a cultural shift over the last 10 years ... and it is on us to react more quickly than we have in the past to stay ahead of the curve,” says Rainbow Six Siege community developer Craig Robinson. “Right now, we are playing catch-up, and that’s not where we need to be in order to get toxicity under control. I expect for there to be a ton of improvements over the next 5-10 years across the industry, especially with the various publishers and developers sharing their learnings and insights through the Fair Play Alliance.”

Minecraft, the best-selling game of all time, is available across 20 different platforms, making community moderators and parental controls essential And plenty of people tackling this issue have already been thinking ahead. Right now, we’ve depended largely on reactive measures to moderate people. The problem with that is it’s after the fact, as in the damage is already done. Many have an eye toward being more proactive, which means trying to anticipate problems before they happen, whether that’s designing to combat them or depending more on filters and A.I. “I think one of the biggest challenges is being stuck in the ways we’ve done things before,” Hart says. “We have the social needs increasing for players online; we need to think of our games differently. We need to be much more proactive. If we wait to have a game to be thinking about how people may interact with each other within that game, we’re already behind because then we have to retrofit systems onto an existing game as opposed to proactively designing to reduce disruption and to help produce those successful interactions. A short way of putting it is we need to move from punitive to proactive.” What’s encouraging is that technology is only going to get better, and many feel optimistic that A.I. will be a great asset in moderation going forward. “A.I. is something that could really be a difference-maker with regards to how we’re able to moderate and how we’re able to enforce its scale across the community,” Tanielian says. Companies like Microsoft have already been investing in this area by trying to get as much data as possible to ensure the A.I. is accurate. “There’s actually goodness in those models getting trained more and more by more data,” McCarthy says. “As an example, we’ve done something called ‘photo DNA’ at Microsoft, where we tag certain images and we actually share that database with a large range of other companies. This is where I think collaboration is actually really important in the industry. Because if we can start to share some of these models and learning, then they get more sophisticated and accurate, and they actually can help a larger range of users overall. That’s just something we have to keep chipping away at: How do we utilize powerful technology like that in the right way? And to get it trained broadly across the industry to do the things we want it to do?” These are big questions, but they’re the ones we can’t afford to leave unsolved, as we’re spending more and more time in these online spaces. Read the full article

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