#but i dont feel like it fits into the post anymore. this is just stuff for people interested in understanding how the game works now

[icewindandboringhorror]

Misc. photos from the past year or so ~

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

i hate that my relationship with my friends will never be the same. i hate that we will never all be on at the same time and making stupid jokes and playing jackbox at 9pm and chatting on discord during online classes. i hate that i will never have that again

[danielnelsen]

the 'talktables' in dao and da2 are the files containing all the text ever used in the game and are typically separated into two talktables per module (in which a module is like.. the base game or a specific dlc): one in the 'module' data folder and the other in the 'core' data folder (typically sorted under 'packages', rather than 'module').

the core talktable generally contains asset text (eg, ability, item, and creature names/descriptions, most codex entries, loading screen text, gui buttons and tooltips, error messages, etc). while most modules have a core talktable, the whole idea of the base game's core resources is to be available to any addons.

the module talktable is where all text specifically related to that module is listed (eg, mostly dialogue, but also specific character names, plot item names/descriptions, plot-related codex entries, etc). this is where the vast majority of dlc text is stored (and the vast majority for the base game too; there's a lot more text in dialogue than in menu options).

[yonpote]

I feel like people are conflating continuing the joke with invading their privacy… like no one is stalking them or sneaking pictures or bothering their friends and family asking about them we’re just continuing their joke that they set up within our fandom space. Which is exactly as we should be doing imo

yeah exactly. like i think when outsiders dont understand that we are in on the bit that makes some sense, but when it's PHANNIES especially phannies who joined post coming out???? it seems strange.

oh i didnt really explain why this kinda behavior is homophobic as well. (disclaimer: me calling an action homophobic is not the same as me calling an individual homophobic.) a lot of ppl use pj and sophie as a direct comparison straight couple example. pj has only directly called sophie his girlfriend once, and it was in the context reading someone's poorly written article about him lmao. otherwise, its known that they met in uni, have lived together since then, have worked on nearly every kickthepj project together, and generally their on screen energy is really sweet and funny. they also have a cat together and call themselves a family. it's not a stretch to say they're together in the slightest. in fact, it is just natural to assume so.

BUT when dnp who are now publicly out, have been very open about how much they mean to each other, have lived together since dan was in uni, have worked on nearly every project together (even in solo projects the other would help out behind the scenes), have a clear on camera chemistry together, had co-parented a fish, a pigeon, and several houseplants and possibly plan to get a dog or other pet in the future... suddenly it's wrong to assume anything.

i understand the fear that may come from having been in the phandom since when they were closeted and it was much harder to talk about it without seeming like youre aligned with stalkers or ppl who harassed their families or dnp themselves to reveal more information, but thats not the case anymore, and ESPECIALLY if you discovered them post-gay, it's such a flimsy argument to say anyone is breaching privacy in that way.

now there are still some like unspoken basic decency and boundary rules. you probably shouldnt be @'ing them in your smutfics or even your pretty innocent theories about them being super duper in gay love. dnp themselves understand that if they aren't being @ tagged in something, it's probably not meant for them to see, and even acknowledged that in the twitter memes video. but us talking about it in our own spaces, especially on tumblr where they arent on as much but also on twitter BECAUSE THEY KNOW THAT THEYRE NOT MEANT TO SEE IT, is not the same as being like hey @/danielhowell @/amazingphil do you fuck nasty i gotta know if you fuck nasty. (but even if i were to do that, i feel like its very clearly a joke lmao)

so like just dont worry about it, if you still personally dont like seeing ppl talk abt this stuff regardless, you can mute and block people, you can blacklist tags, you can curate your own experience to fit your needs and you dont need to harass other people into suiting your needs.

[thatdeadaquarius]

I have so many ideas but none of them can be put into words, all I can do is just wheeze as they come along🤣

Also remember how wordy and flowery Teyvat speech/dialogue is? ADD THAT TO THE FACT THAT TEYVAT HAS ITS OWN LANGUAGE---

Reader can understand the basic speech which is why they are so blunt (I love this idea so much 🤣) and can piece together an idea what the person is talking about.

*insert random person talking about a commission with a long ass backstory*

Traveller & Co.: *understands completely and making plans to retrieve said commission*

C!Reader: (They said they had a cart.... a bunch of hilichurls appeared... dancing?.... they want us to dance fight the hilichurls???? Dance off???)

Actual story->The person's cart got ambushed by a group of hilichurls and taunted them by dancing around it.

....... it doesnt always translate well

Also imagine Reader heaeing random names and overthinks it as a word instead of a name.

Example: Pantalone means pants in Philippine English (sorry not sorry Pantalone)

Tsaritsa??? Oh do they speak russian there??? - reader

Capitano -> captain in some countries

(I once mistake Sandrone as Sandalone and I just went "... ehh??? Standalone? Sandalone as in Sand Alone???? Sandal (Flip flops)????

Oh wait its Sandrone" ".... as in Sand and Drone??--)

-Vine Boom

VINE BOOM ANON MY BELOVED 💖❤🧡💛💚💙💜✨️✨️

Gif is me writing u anything ever:

AHFLALA FERRRALLL I STG I ALSO THOUGHT ABT THIS!! WHY U COULD ALSO BE BLUNT BC U ONLY GOT THE BASICS 💀 RIP

Man theyre written language looks so scary to learn, kinda like when I looked into trying to learn Mandarin/Japanese (and even Korean), the letters r just inherently so different i was so intimidated

And u dont even read it like left -> right like English

Omg i tried to reply to a arabic comment on my art post once, and i felt so acommplished when i finally was able to type "اشكرك (thanks)" but like, i had to put it on the OTHER SIDE OF THE TEXT BOX, LIKE ALIGN IT TO THE RIGHT INSTEAD OF HOW U KNOW ENGLISH IS INHERENTLY ALIGNED LEFT, IT WAS SO TRIPPY-

Going thru genshin life only understanding minimal words of anything anyone says is honestly how i feel like ive been playing Genshin LMAO

Those analysis videos/lore are saving a bitch's life out here

PANTALONE IS ALSO RLLY CLOSE TO SPANISH FOR PANTS I KNOW WHAT U MEANNN LOL

UR ENDLESS CONFUSION FOR SANDRONE PLEASE ANON U DIDNT EVEN GET IT RIGHT THE FIRST CORRECTION IT JUST KEPT GETTING WORSEEE 😂😭 SAME THO

That would literally be you in genshin tho, like i could easily see it being like, back to back misunderstandings 😭😭

Like u think u got it right (Oh so his name is Rex Lapis, wait what? Morax? Ok his name is Morax...?? What??? Zhongli??? WHO IS THIS MAN-)

.

JFC first they gotta have a whole different language (like u saw in game)

And ON TOP OF THAT THEY CAN TALK FOR 10 MIN STRAIGHT ABT THE WEATHER OR SOME SHIT??

No... just, no.

U quickly decide u like what little bits of language u could pick up so far, which just results in,

U guessed it, simple speech and short fragmented sentences (or broken Teyvatian)

U cant even bring urself to care when u give half the characters a heart attack and send the rest into laughing fits

No fucks given, they wanna make this extra hard on u by being wordy on top of a new language,

Yeah u dont care what comes out of ur mouth anymore

Also, since everybody is raised in Teyvat very few ppl dont know the language, which once again brings us back to ancient/older deities/creatures who have a more simplistic version/outdated version of modern language

.

Omg getting stuff mistranslated bc u cant understand it all/only keywords sounds like hell but also rlly funny

Traveler/Paimon: "Alright, yes, all is well. We will accept this comission, and depart soon."

You: "...they want us to?? Dance fight?? Hilichurls...???"

Traveler just stares at u half in pity, half trying to hide their amused smile, Paimon is giggling

The commissioner is shook bc a supposed ancient creature?? Just accepted?? Their simple commission?? And u think they want u to dance battle???

.

PLEASE U MISTRANSLATE THE HARBINGERS NAMES RIGHT TO THEIR FACES

Signora: "You shall rue the day you crossed the Fatui mortals!"

You: "Lady we don't care, just fight us."

(Signora just means 'Lady')

Signora: *offended gasp*

Traveler/Paimon trying to stifle laughter

Raiden Shogun jaw dropped a little

.

Pantalone: "What a pleasure to finally meet you traveler, and thine wonderful companions!" *little bastard smile*

You: "And it was awful to meet you, Pants."

Pantalone: 😶😧😡 "Pants?! HOW DARE YOU NOT EVEN GIVE ME THE MOST BASE RESPECT, AFTER I GREETED THEE SO KINDLY-"

.

Oh its so funny, everytime you talk about Childe you always phrase it like he's an actual child bc u thought everyone was just calling him a little kid for some reason (u dont know how Teyvat ages work, he could be for all you know!)

Not very long, but Vine Boom anon your brain >>>>

Ur ideas r so on point, i love them sm

That makes perfect sense why u could be talking blunt too, like an in world explanation really

For you, all the desserts🥰 🤲🍪🍨🍰🍮🧋🍦🍡

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

[ganondoodle]

so its part of a way longer post i made some days ago but i want to highlight this part of it:

"i cant stop thinking about the devs saying sth like "after botw zelda wondered if the kingdom of hyrule needed to keep existing the way it had been before the calamity, but then totk happens" bc it just feels like they realized too late that botw naturally led into questioning the status quo and they scrambled to fit it back into a flat and boring road we have seen so many times before (or even worse really) with totk zeldas character naturally leads into her questioning and reexamine their history and set of rules? we gotta teach her a lesson of why she is importante god given monarchy girl that has to keep it bc what if evil brown man shows up again for no reason maybe im grasping at straws here but looking at it this way the sonau .. make more "sense"; the shiekah were a group that was under the rule of the royal family, and misstreated before (oh no look soemthing interesting) so they dont lend themselves well to be used for teaching zelda that lesson- the sonau however are tailored really to be just that; they are a supposedly godly race from the literal sky that founded this version of hyrule, that had tech even more advanced and better than the shiekah, she gets put in the past to meet the perfect god king of goodness personally, also his very fridgy wifey that zelda later replaces in a way, shes put there and treated like family and then gets to see just how evil that evil big man from the desert is, sonia is falcon-punched to death solely so zelda can feel obligated to take over her role, have her new, better 'family' hurt by gan; similarly so raurus sacrifice, look what a noble and good king he is, he payed the ultimate price to lock that evil man away, now zelda you cannot let their sacrifice go to waste, rebuild that divinely good kingdom like it was!!"

bc it feels like i finally "cracked the code" of why the sonau feel both like a reskinned version of the shikeah .. while also not at all to me, so shoved into every single corner of the game and its history (not even the forgotten temple being safe from them sure is .... also something, like them being spread all over hyrule, not just the undergound, but the surface AND sky as well isnt weird enough, the shiekah at least were integrated into the world and by far not as idolized as the sonau)

seeing the sonau like this ""better"" and more """perfect"" version of the shiekah bc they are untainted by any possible complicated relationships with especially the royal family (the sonau ARE the prefect, idyllic royal family of the past after all) makes them make so much more "sense" to me, they are a bad mix of OOTs and botws structure, sure, but the way they were done in the game i cannot for the life of me see it as that being their sole problem

(also looking at how shiekah tech was downgraded to some side gimick of purah ... idk if they ever even call it shiekah at all anymore, and if "all sheikah tech just vanished" like the devs said then ... how does any of that still exist huh? it doesnt add up at all except if you see it as the sonau being the ""better"" version of the shiekah with none of the "problematic" parts or history or conenctions (which would be .. interesting) bc they are supposed to represent that idyllic past zelda should feel obligated to recreate now, to uphold that sweet status quo ..

sidenote: someone on the post i talked about his before said its also dumbo that there is supposedly no connection at all between the shiekah and sonau, and yes! that was something i ranted about while i was still playing the game back in may even (most of my later gameplay at some point devolves into a rant about how stupid it is that there is no connection and instead its all just ... gone) bc its just ... so dumb

its also how i chose to integrate the sonau better into the world in my totk rewrite stuff, that they were once there aand had high tech but its by now only crumbs left with nothing funtcioning anymore but you discover that at the time of the ancient shiekah finding it it was still researchable and they build their tech based on the sonau ruins even if the sonau stuff is nothing but dust anymore- which i find a super ... obvious way to give the sonau a better connection to the existing world, keep the shiekah, expand upon their mystery while also still keepign them as such-

.... anyway, there beign no connection at all somehow also fits even more into my theory of the sonau, again, being there solely to represent the idyllic, perfect past zelda needs to feel obligated to rebuild while the shiekah are nothign but a funney gimick of purah now while everything else "just vanished" somehow bc we dont wanna deal with the shiekahs imperfect past so they really should be just a a helpful helper of the rocals (and the yiga a side note as a little threat to be different from the usual monsters but thats all that there is :)))) -

this is getting too long again .. feel free to add your two cents on it and if seeign the sonau like this makes them make more 'sense' to you too

[onlyjaeyun]

okay i saw this post about writers aren't inclusive in their works if they put a 'face claim', assign the reader to be a male/female, assign clothes to the reader, describe the reader's appearance and all of that stuff. and i just feel like that's stupid. because if a fic has the pairing as 'abc x fem reader' then it's been mentioned that the reader IS A FEMALE. if you don't want to read that then it's completely fine and just don't read it, but don't tell the author to be more 'inclusive' and what not. as for the descriptions of appearance i saw this writer get bashed for writing a work a particularly skinny or fit reader in mind even though in the final work the reader's body type wasn't even specified. if a writer writes something with a 'chubby' reader in mind, why doesn't anyone bash them then? i personally don't really read works where the reader has been specified with a specific race and it has been mentioned because i juat don't relate with them. but i don't tell the author to be more inclusive or bash them for being 'stereotypical'. and in fact i believe that describing the reader in a fic, like the basic stuff such as hair and like eyes, makes the quality of the fic better as it explores more depth rather than being simply two dimensional. there was also something mentioned about how writer's shouldn't describe the personality of the reader and whatnot because 'they wouldn't do anything like that in the first place' i mean WHAT. if you expect someone to not describe the personality, appearance and overall general things WHAT WILL THE PERSON BE. like do they expect the writer to not fill out the person's personality and not describe their general appearance? then with that logic they shouldn't even mention some things such as hands because what if the reader doesn't have them. they shouldn't mention the reader speaking because what if the reader can't speak. a writer describing the the type of reader they have in mind ISN'T NOT BEING INCLUSIVE. IT 'S CALLED GOOD WRITING AND DEPICTION OF CHARACTERs. oh and this isn't targeted towards you 😭😭😭 i absolutely adore your works and love your writing as much as i can

firstly, you actually hit the right inbox with this topic bc i PERSONALLY agree 100%. it's a very heavily discussed topic which i get bc its a READER insert after all but as you said, its basically still just a character snd thats how i'm gonna treat my y/ns!!!! i just personally prefer writing in second person than first or third so this is the only way for me to work with the writing style i prefer and i am not gonna let people take that away from me anymore.

yes it's controversial and i know people criticize writer's like me but i don treally care bc again, if you dont like smth you really dont have to read it. there are amazing writers who have amazing reader insert fics with absolutely no character descriptions, you just gotta put effort to find them!!!

also thank you sm for your sweet words baby, ilysm 💞

[n7punk]

i know i've kind of talked around this stuff for... fuck, three years now? but idk, now it's getting closer to "resolving," i kind of want to talk about it. journal, get it off my chest, idk

i haven't really been specific about my health issues much because 1) privacy and 2) very complicated feelings on it, but feelings are becoming less complicated, so... yeah. privacy is still really important to me, but i have too many feelings about this to keep feeling like i'm silencing myself for some hypothetical... i dont even know what

tbf, if it had turned out to be anything else, i probably wouldn't be comfortable even making a vent post about it now. but it turned out to be. annoyingly simple. i've also got other stuff, physical disabilities and such i've been more candid about but still want to keep the specifics of private, but this is... very different.

long story short, during the pandemic i started experiencing Symptoms. i'm honestly not sure if/how much i have talked about what was wrong with me, because i don't remember... entire years, much at all. i know ive described it as my brain being on fire, but it's more like it instantly melted down and i was left with the aftermath for hours/days/weeks at a time. it really fucked with me emotionally to be fighting through that on top of the direct effects of the Symptoms. and, well, the problem was my brain (probably) so that tracks.

it turns out it was migraines. migraines that shared many symptoms with seizures, brain tumors, or pressure on the brain stem, but yeah. "just" "migraines." and, actually, we don't know that! but migraine medication is helping, so it's probably that and this is where i am, finally waking up these last few months (this summer of updates could Not have happened if it weren't for my new medication) and feeling both very frustrated with what i lost and relieved to not always have to deal with suddenly being unable to understand a sentence anymore.

it's not like. fixed. my brain is still going to burn sometimes. It seems to come in waves, like two bad weeks and then two good ones. we're not done trying to treat it now we know some stuff it's responsive to, but its not like it used to be, wildfires raging all day and my head wavering on my shoulders as i struggled just to read messages from my friends. i literally had an emote i would use to communicate when i couldn't communicate that everybody who knows me understands. i haven't even twitched since starting my new meds! well, like, uncontrollably. trust me, that's progress. i literally had to get a bigger bed so i could be safe in the middle of it when the fits were especially bad and i got twitchy.

uh so that was more story than i planned. really i just wanted to finally talk about what i've been experiencing (at least for the first time that i remember). honestly writing was the only thing that kept me sane while i was trapped inside my own malfunctioning brain. i don't know why it was one of the easiest things for me, when i couldn't even understand a full two sentences being said to me i could still - usually - write (again: i literally couldn't talk for like three of the days when i was writing and updating catcher daily), but i'm so grateful for it. and everybody who told me my stories helped you, or that you looked forward to them, or even just that you enjoyed them: you helped me right back, because you told me there was one thing i could still do, from a capability standpoint to having the ability to make any impact on the world when i was trapped at home. so thank you.

okay i'm done now. just. had to get that out

[mostlymaudlin]

ooooooh ok juicy sfc posts happening !! i rly honestly truly love to see it. here's my unasked for two cents, as someone who did find the story really hopeful. im posting this not to like, discourse or disagree or discount what im seeing, but to just maybe offer a different pov for ppl who might be trying to file this story away in a less devastating way.

i, of course, think baz deserves better than what he gets from his family. we all deserve to have families that love us unconditionally, and so many of us DONT have that -- including baz. that hurts !! i also think simon didn't deserve to lose his magic, and penny didn't deserve to take on the sole responsibility for keeping simon safe, and agatha didnt deserve to be shoved into every princess/damsel role ppl cast on her, etc etc. 

what i like so much abt this series is that ppl dont get what they deserve, but theyre still okay. its why i also love the end of awtwb -- simons LICH ER ALL Y crying lol. he got a whole mega-bucket of extra trauma dumped on his plate that he hasnt even started to process. but its still so clear that he's got the support he needs to live a good life alongside this terrible knowledge. the mage fucked him over even more than he knew, but he doesnt have to define himself by these terms anymore -- we've seen his growth in this regard.

bazs main arc in the series is about how he sees himself -- in crudely simple terms, he rly wants to be a Good Guy (you know, not a vampire, straight, a good pitch etc etc) but sees himself as cursed with that impossibility. this continues as his idealized Good Guy self develops over the course of the books into something that actually feels more achievable to him and is less reliant on the shit his family put on him growing up. 

the cool thing about snow for christmas is that -- just like when simon finds out abt the mage at the end of awtwb -- we get to see baz's new sense of self tested. we get to see what he's using to draw the lines of morality. and we get to see that while of course he still cares about what his family thinks, and it still causes him anxiety and trauma and all the shitty things that he doesnt deserve -- he has grown from that place where their value system can make him hate himself.

and moreso on the hope part -- the grimms value, above all, the ability to fit into the roles they think theyre supposed to hold. its bullshit, and they've both caused themselves problems and absolutely are fucking up their children. daphne fully had to be saved by a cult bc of it and shes still not over that mindset -- these ppl need therapy lol. so it's def sick n twisted that they're celebrating baz being able to hide better rather than celebrating who baz is, but is this not the utmost sign of love that they're capable of? baz gets to fit in better -- that's all they've ever wanted for him, whether we agree with that or not. baz seems to recognize the balance of this in the story. he narrates the rest of the dinner with a sort of dry, relieved, disbelieving tone. it’s like hes huffing a laugh, shaking his head, thinking, “did i really used to pin so much of myself on this stuff? how silly.” he is not distressed bc he understands his parents, and he has, again, divorced his sense of self from their expectations. so much so tht he says fuck it and gives simon the lil kissy at the end, because THIS is his new value system: he ALWAYS kisses simon goodbye!

so, is this a step forward for the grimms being more supportive parents? yeah, maybe not. maybe it never gets better than baz hiding his fangs at dinner and everyone doing the bare minimum to accept simon's role in baz’s life. that's not what baz and simon deserve. but it could be enough, because simon and baz have different ways that they measure their happiness by. they have each other and penny and shep and ruth and agatha and niamh and every other person they'll meet in the many, many years ahead of them whose opinions they can choose to make important to them, or reject. i love this for them! the true queer hope story imo. thats what i want for myself and for the people i love. 

to be clear: this story made me sob so hard i scared my cats. (im not rly a crier, they did not know what to do). i had to put it down in the middle because i couldnt see the page. any queer person who has Family Shit is bound to get whammied lol. but! i personally find comfort in the idea that we can coexist with people who are important to us but also very difficult to be around, even if its not totally what we deserve. its a very quiet, somber hope -- but that only makes it feel more real to me. 

[blonde-tori-spring555]

ugh i hate when i feel on the verge of a panic attack

imma rant for a sec soz, u dont have to read the whole thing

...

im just so stressed rn, with school, family, friends and ive got like two auditions i need to prepare for and tbh i just feel anxious for no reason, i feel like im getting 'bad' again, like were i was just in my room and doing the same thing everyday and my brain hated that, and i just felt numb, like i dont think im depressed or anything like idk, i feel like i should explain what happened to originally make me feel like this, i wont go into full detail ect, but yeh

basically i was friends with this girl (we met at performing arts classes) and she i guess never rlly treated me amazing and was always slightly werid for example (not saying this is weird but from the way she is irl and they way she sounded seemed strange) so last year i was facetiming her and i was like "oh btw ive got a bf now", and she kinda seemed a bit Awkard, like her smile faded and she was just kinda like "oh thats great for u" a bit numbly (i should probs mention she isnt straight and for all ik she is bi) and then instantly changes the subject to "oh btw i was thinking of asking out-" and yeh we talked about it, anyway i spoke to my mum how i thought it was a bit weird and my mum said "oh hahaha maybe she has a crush on u" and im (pretty sure im) straight so like i didnt know how to react, anyway fast forward she started to act rlly weird and yeh, like kinda being a bit dramatic about stuff, anyway one week, this was in October, i didnt rlly text her because i was rlly busy, i was hanging out with my school friends and stuff, and i wanna say she could of text me and i would of responded, maybe not right away but i would of told her i was a bit busy if she had asked, but no, one of our friends told us she was upset that i hadnt been texting her and that i should, yk so i did, and she didnt respond, then she left our performing arts gc (with our friends in it from there) so i asked her why and two days later she responded saying she felt she didnt fit it, and at this point i was kinda sick of this drama so i was by choice not gonna text her for a few days and take care of myself, then one day while at school she send me a fucking video (like a capcut edit) basically calling me and my friends from theatre bad friends, and saying i need to send it to them, anyway i didnt and we told the woman that owns our company, and btw my mum knew the whole time, from when she started acting strange, and my mum was saying to the woman that owned the company, that she will call the poice if needed and if it has been sent out and posted (the video had my face in it), then she text me calling my mum stupid and calling me stupid so i blocked her, and after that i told her we are not friends and to leave me alone, then in December i repeated we are not friends but im not sitting here being pissed anymore so like forget about the shit and move on BUT WE ARE NOT FRIENDS, anyway this bs has been dragged on for like 5-6 months and she fucking keeps harassing me to the point ive had to block her on all platforms. anyway yeh :)

[necroromantics]

Regarding being "cancelled"

Im not gonna address this further unless anyone needs clarification or something cuz its just drama with random ass kids who I'm not interested in interacting with

Some people dug up a fuck ton of old screenshots of shit I said in my server a year ago. Not gonna deny saying any of that, cuz I did say it, and I've said worse, and if you've talked to me at all I am always very open about this stuff.

In the screenshots I made jokes about disabled people and said I don't care if someone is a Nazi, because at the time my server had like no rules, everything was free reign (which is now changed). This is because I did not care if someone was disabled or a Nazi. It kinda comes hand in hand with ASPD, not caring unless it directly effects you. This does not mean I condone or support the things I joked about*

If you don't know what ASPD is, it's antisocial personality disorder, its characterized by "disregard for peoples rights and feelings". The reason I was even diagnosed in the first place was because I fit the criteria of crossing moral boundaries, disregarding peoples feelings, and not fitting into social norms. I was VERY bad with that in the past, especially a year ago when I was 18 years old, very deep in drug addiction, and didn't have the support system I have now.

If you want to judge me based on my past mistakes and actions, I can't control you. I don't expect anyone to like me, but I do care to get my side out too. I post here because I have fun, not because I care what people think. And if you judge me from shit I said as a drug addicted horribly mentally ill 18 yr old, then that isn't my problem.

Love the label, hate the symptoms yeah?

I don't like apologizing for things I'm not actually sorry for so this isn't an apology. I know I've said a lot of jarring and rude and fucked up things in the past, but if you know me at all then you know it never came from a place of hatred. To me, as someone with ASPD, its about proving that things like societal rules and norms aren't going to be another thing that controls you, so you just ignore them completely. This is what makes it a disorder. Cuz it's irrational and dysfunctional and causes problems like this

Also they vaguely mentioned me abusing someone who's borderline which is ??? because all the relationships with borderlines Ive been in had been very unhealthy on both sides. My mom has BPD so I know how to help those with BPD and Ive always tried my best to cater to BPDers symptoms and issues, even in the relationships where their condition got too much for me.

But yeah, I made mistakes in the past, and I'm not that person anymore, or at least I try hard not to be. I've been sober for almost a year, I have amazing friends and a good support system, I'm on medication for my bipolar disorder. Judge me from the past, but anyone who talks to me now knows that I work very hard to get over those mindsets and habits. To me, thats all that matters.

Edit: Not blaming my disorder, its just easier to explain. I'm taking full blame for what I said in the past, and I acknowledge that it was morally wrong. I said what I said. These people have been absolutely hellbent on being on my ass for months now when all I want to do is just chill out, get better, and live life. Theyre gonna keep complaining about everything I do, and I don't care to make any more edits, just wanted to clarify that Im not making excuses. Also I don't support Nazi's, I just made jokes about it. Anyone who knows me knows Im very against that shit

(I dont mean to sound callous or whatever, I just woke up to this and wanted to quickly clear shit up before it all blows out of proportion)

[crazysodomite]

Heres the thing. obviously i understand how it feels when you spend hours upon hours and years upon years on your creations and they get almost no engagement or interest. and it has been said a million times before how you shouldn't base your self worth on social media responses and all. lets just say not everyone can flip a switch in their brain and say 'i dont care and will not pay attention to this anymore'. we all want to be seen and heard even if it comes in the form of numbers of likes and shares. and im not touching on the reality that if you want to make money off your art you need engagement because that's a whole different thing entirely.

the reality is that theres a lot of people on the internet and people curate their online profiles on what appeals to them. there are few people who will share art just for the love of the game frankly. people will share what fits their 'theme' or their fandoms and interests and not much aside from this. and if you don't create works that broadly appeal to a very high number of people your numbers will plummet. if you aren't creating works that make 10.000 people laugh/relate/want to have your work on their profile you won't get 10.000 shares and it doesn't reflect on you as an artist or as a person. its also why text posts/memes always get much more engagement than artworks. it's just easier to relate to a funny text post than to a piece of art (no matter the 'skill level' or whatever).

heres what i think and what concerns me. more often than not the amount of attention you get is never going to be enough if you focus on numbers. someone who routinely gets 10k shares will often be distressed that one of their pieces only got 5k shares. and so on and so forth. i personally think people need to focus on making community with peers. truth is that 1 person who is genuinely engaged and interested in your stuff is better than 100 people who press share and forget about it, no? if you engage with other people's creations and lift them up you will notice they will probably do the same for you! try to make friends (or at least internet neighbors. you know im too shy to befriend people so i understand) share and comment on other peoples stuff in your circle and you will start making mutual connections and start enjoying art more. obviously some people don't care to engage with other people and that's fine. you will find people who do! i just think focusing on numbers instead of community is not healthy. its like. if i go into inspect element and enter 100000 likes and shares for my artwork, how is that better? let's say my piece blows up. people will scroll away and forget. but that one mutual you made because you both love each others art and projects isnt gonna forget.

also some stuff i want to say as a guy whos in it for the love of the game.

self rb your art and dont depend on stuff blowing up in a day or whatever. talk about your pieces (if you want to obviously) your process, your ideas etc. talk about what excites you and what you liked in each piece. its easier to be engaged when You are engaged in your own stuff. also im talking about all types of artists sorry if what i wrote feels too visual arts focused i love all art forever

also about ocs and worlds and so on. personally if im scrolling and i see someone talking about their ocs im interested. but i wish it was more common to put info about your ocs in a visible place for people to access. I Will Read All That. people who are interested in your ideas but can't find a write up to understand what you're talking about are probably going to be confused. so like! if you'd like more engagement with your oc content try to make it easy for people to 'jump in'. creating tags for info of your ocs/world/etc is also a good idea (i will read all that). or dont. im not forcing anyone to do anything.

[knightofhylia]

On the topic of oppositional sexism, y'all the witchcraft community is RIFE with it.

My partner and I are both trans masc magic users and it's very hard to find a place where we fit in. We have both been on testosterone for a few years and he has had top surgery so it's not like we aren't """ passing """. Still ended up getting misgendered by a (and I quote) "Divine feminine embodiment guidess, creatrix for the celestial sisterhood who runs women's retreats and red tents"

I can't imagine that this woman has good opinions on trans people if 'guide' and 'creator' are too masculine. Just feels like Wombyn all over again. Anytime I see "Divine Feminine" and "Divine Masculine" being used I move along because I know it's a short step from divine genders to transphobia. There's no issue with wanting to be more in touch with your femininity but you're going to have to realize that in the end it is the BALANCE of energies that is important. We use indica and sativa as descriptors instead, find whatever works for you.

When I first started looking into magic stuff there was the distinction that "witches were women, warlocks were men" and I feel like that hasn't changed that much in a grand scheme. I DO see other masc practitioners but we get pushed aside and seen as aggressive or "low vibes". Same with the "all women are born with magic" "we are the granddaughters of the witches you couldn't burn" rhetoric. I've seen Tumblr bios that were public fuck yous to all the men in the bible but devoted to Lilith (which seems to be common. People who don't do their research about basic gender definitely dont do their research on antisemitism and cultural appropriation). like ok, how am I supposed to feel about that as a man that you don't believe any man in the bible had significance it was all women? Sorry Jesus, should've been Josephina.

It just goes to show how much people ARENT doing shadow work. Okay so you've peeked behind the veil and saw that we are all stardust and dirt and nothing and everything is real and STILL want to seperate us by our genitals?? If masculinity is too scary for you then redefine what masculine is because THATS where the magic comes from. Not period blood or ovaries but our abilities as humans to shape our reality. Nonbinary people have BEEN holy in other societies and yet you just erase their entire existance. Good luck manifesting some human decency.

btw I will just block any haters comments I don't care. If you have something you want to debate about this post go say it to your #girlboss first I'm too busy corrupting the astral with my barren womb and hairy boobs.

WE DONT NEED ANYMORE SEPERATION AND HATE IN THIS WORLD YALL DO YOUR SHADOW WORK

[strawglicks]

Sorry for the ramble in your inbox incoming- I'm a really huge fan of your analysis type posts like the ones about Cathal and recently Flint ;A; So I hope its ok to maybe throw in my own 2 cents about Cogs/their society- (Sorry this gets rambly I thought about this last night and writing this like an hour after waking up lol)

I think what alot of people kind of (I wouldnt say ignore- more of:) don't really get is that I dont believe characters like Cathal or Flint have bad tendencies because they really want to in a way, (I kind of worded that poorly but point is) but because their society rewards and encourages that type of behavior. I think you said something kind of similar on Cathals post- But especially for Flint, whose a Bossbot (Who are literally the embodiment of a toxic workplace and elitism. I believe a old snippet from the TTO magazines says "They have no real skills of their own, just the ability to push down others and stay on top!" Or something to that nature.) he has to be demanding and imposing. There is no benefit to him in being kind. (Like looking at Misty for example) And don't get me wrong I don't believe that if Flint and Cathal were removed from Cog society they'd be better/objectively nicer (Like Flint not being condescending to Toons and Cathal not making people do things for him and being encouraged to try) But I do wonder how much of it is pressure, or how much of it is egged on and rewarded. Atleast in the aspects it relates to how they treat others.

(..And also I wonder what happens to Cogs that don't get jobs and are seen as ..not functioning. Since Graham was freaking the hell out in "Meeting Of Two Minds" over the possibility of not getting the job. I have a whole thing about this actually in my oc lore but thats another thing entirely I'll write about someday I swear)

Also I gasped when I saw the doodle of Graham in the MSI shirt finally a MSI listener Graham truther. I think he'd like the album "How I Learned To" and of course "You'll Rebel To Anything". I associate him mainly with the songs "Lights Out", "On It", and "You're No Fun Anymore" :p (This has been my favorite band since I was like 13 and now I get to spill all my opinions xD) I always imagined him doing the guitar backbend their bassist does! And my final hc is that Flint plays bass and Graham plays the main guitar. I think it fits them .. some people overlook bass when its actually pretty hard to learn from what I hear and vital to the song. (Like heres Feel Good Inc w/o the bass.. feels wrong x_x)

Anyways thanks for reading ;A; take care and happy new year!

RAHHHH EATING THIS UP YUM YUM YUM YES YES YOU GET IT

THe biggest issue with Cogs Inc is that it REWARDS and ENCOURAGES these poor behaviors, worsening these characters as people. ESPECIALLY cathal considering the position of power they’re in. I’m sure it applies to a ton of other cogs too, but unfortunately I haven’t gotten to them yet bc I’m not as insane abt them . LMAO

And yeah since cogs are literally built for work, it’s a wonder what happens to those who can’t find a job as easily as others. Hoping that gets built on since it’s clear in MOTM that these cogs have to actually apply and go to interviews and probably face some trial and error to land a job, just like people IRL.

ALSO. THE BAND HCS. I love it and you’re SOOOO RIGHT about the backbend that is so grahamcore. And yes I’m pretty sure Flint does play bass, I think his creator mailman said smth abt that on their blog . AND IM SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT UP FEEL GOOD INC bc i did draw flint in a demon days shirt in that same animatic . And ive def drawn them in the same shirt a couple times in the past too . I’ve always imagined him to be a Gorillaz fan, maybe graham too

Anyway ty for these thoughts im eating them up and leaving no crumbs . I love when ppl come to ramble in my inbox bc discussing this stuff IS SO FUN and a good outlet for me esp when i might be having art burnout rn .

[stilespeters]

As the world caves in

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6)

pairing: the evans x reader

a/n: im sleepy. also, i changed kit to tate, dont worry, kit is still gonna make a cameo!! i just thought tate fitted better for the story:)

words: 3485

summary: you meet an unusual group of people in the post-apocalypse.

warnings: guns? mentions of Justin Biebers hair, brief talks about zombies, carjacking

part 2: meet the Anderson's

You walked on the hill, climbing your way down to the scrawny building, and when you wanted to round the corner to the entrance, you stopped in your tracks as you heard commotion. That can’t be true right? As long as you remembered, Geeks weren’t able to talk. So only one conclusion came to your mind.

It were humans.

Your first instinct told you danger.

Raiders.

Immediately a little voice in your head screamed at you to make a run for it as you heard they were males, and you backed away a little to make sure they wouldn't be able to see you behind the wall. You carefully grabbed your shotgun, and sucked in a deep breath as your heart rate seemed to quicken. When you tried to analyze their voices, you heard they sounded quite young. You wouldn't let their young sounding voices define the people that were there. For all you knew, they were really Raiders, and the second you’d show yourself, they’d rob you. There weren't many left of the nice people in the world, so why would they?

But curiosity took over as you wanted to take a quick peek at the humans a few feet away, and you leaned a bit forward when you took a step closer.

Four boys were surrounded by a black jeep, and they all looked similar, which made you believe they were probably brothers.

Your eyes were immediately drawn towards the vehicle, and you wondered if they drove here with it. If they did, then maybe the car would still work, which is like gold. Having a working vehicle was probably the best thing you could have in the apocalypse. Another thing you noticed was that there was a ski box on top of the car, and you figured that must be where they put their stuff. It almost looked as if they were on a road trip.

Your eyes then diverted back to the brothers.

The first one that caught your attention was a guy with blue hair and a spear in his hands. The other one wore a black t-shirt, which was odd since it was winter and he had a machete in his hands. You gripped your weapon tighter at the sight of the weapons. Everything about the group screamed that they could hurt you.

Machete and Blue looked the oldest of the group. Then there were two boys who looked exactly the same, only one had his hair silver, and the other one had hair that screamed Justin Bieber. Silver wore a black jacket, and Bieber wore a black sweater with green stripes. Bieber had a crossbow in his hands and Silver had a silver baseball bat in his hands. lt matched his hair.

Taking another look at them, you noticed another thing that was gnawing at you. All of their haircuts seemed to be perfectly styled and all of their shirts were clean too. Not one sprinkle of dirt covered their outfits. Something didn't add up. It felt odd.

It didn't help that Silver had an apple in his hand. How the fuck do you manage to get an apple in the post apocalypse? It’s probably because they are from a colony.

You still peeked from behind the wall and could feel your legs were shaking as you stuck out your ass to get a better look at the group. Walking for the whole day was exhausting, since you spent most days inside your Safe Zone. You only went out for supply runs. That’s why your cardio wasn't the best, even though you tried to stay fit as much as possible. Luckily all Geeks are slow in the day time, so you wouldn't have to be afraid they'll catch up to you. Humans however, could easily outrun you.

Silver started talking to Blue, who was busy duct taping something in the jeep. And you saw that Machete and Bieber weren't there anymore. You guessed they went inside the gas station.

You could faintly hear Blue curse, and Silver was visibly annoyed. Blue ignored him as he focused on the car only.

“Kai, if you’d just-” Silver reached out for the jeep which was a big mistake.

“-Hands off my jeep.” Blue -apparently Kai scolded him and slapped his hand away with more fierceness than you had ever seen. It made you realize Blue seemed to have some sort of bond with the jeep, and Silver rolled his eyes Blue walked to the entrance of the building. At the same time, Bieber walked out and Silver looked annoyed yet again at the sight.

“Hey Peter, bring me your bat, there is a Geek here. A slow one.”

You raised your eyebrows. Don’t they know all of the Geeks were always slow in the daytime? So why did they have to add the word ‘slow’ to it? It seems completely unnecessary. As if you’re saying ‘white snow’.

Silver- apparently named Peter, scoffed, “For the last time, Tate, I’m not giving you my bat. You’ll probably break her. Rosa is too important to me.” If you didn’t know the context about Rosa being a bat, you would’ve thought it was a person.

Justin Bieber- apparently Tate, threw his hands in the air. “Forget I asked about the bat… but dude, look around. There is literally no one, you're being paranoid over nothing. And why would I break such an old, ugly and-”

“-Don’t you dare finish that sentence, Tate. I’m already coming.” Peter didn’t spare a second look at Tate, and Peter walked to the front to give him the bat. They then walked together inside the shop, and when you were sure no one was looking, you made your way sneaking to the Jeep. You opened the door and went inside.

The key was still in the slot on the steering column and you thanked whoever was up there for your luck. Usually luck was never on your side, so it was nice to finally get something in return. It’s a shame that the brothers seemed kind of nice, because now you’ll have their jeep and their stuff. It might feel wrong, but like you said before. It was everyone for themselves. If Raiders are allowed to raid, then so were you.

You laid your shotgun in the seat next to you, started the ignition and…

“Get out of the car!”

Fuck.

You froze at the voice, until the passenger door violently opened. You jerked your head to the side to meet eyes with Blue and he looked surprised.

You didn’t even hold eye contact for a second before you came to your senses and grabbed the shotgun that lay next to you, pointing it at Blue who stood on the other side, and he seemed startled as he backed away.

You kicked the driver door open, running around the car to aim your gun at the stranger. The time you took kicking open the door and running towards him gave him about 4 seconds time to get into action, but it wasn’t enough since he stumbled on the ground, headed for the entrance when you already caught up to him.

“Freeze!” He froze, slowly turning around and facing you, his hands in defeat in the air. He looked rather annoyed, like he wasn’t impressed, and his brothers seemed to notice what’s going on outside as they ran outside.

“Kai, what is happe-” The front one saw everything first and halted, spreading his arms so that the other two next to him stopped as well. You aimed your gun at the three, still keeping sight of the boy named Kai.

Tate had the crossbow in his hands, and immediately shot at you, but as you closed your eyes for a split second, nothing hurt. Instead, he hit the side of the jeep, ricocheting against the side. You aimed your gun at him, which made him put his crossbow on the ground. Machete placed his weapon on the ground and raised his hands in the air. Peter did the same.

You then gestured with your gun for them to stand next to Kai, and when all four of them were in line, you didn’t know which person to point it at. So eventually you decided to just aim it at the same person. Which was Kai, ‘cause unlike the other boys, his facial expression seemed to be the most calm, so you wanted to make sure he didn’t plan on trying to do something stupid.

“Put the gun down, woman.” His voice sounded annoyed and frustratingly deep.

“No.”

He sighed, taking a step closer but when you cocked your head to the side and dared him with your eyes, he took a step back.

“Look, you don’t want to do this, just put the shotgun down and let us leave, or you’ll regret it.”

“Sorry, but I need that car and your weapons.”

Talking about the bat seemingly made Peter angry and he pointed an accusing finger at you. “Don’t you dare!” He then looked at the bat on the ground. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll make sure she won’t touch you.” He yelled it with all his heart. It made you frown. Peter just looked upset, making you shake your head and inspect the brothers again.

You needed to make sure there weren’t more people with them. For all you know they live nearby and they’ll warn their colony which makes you a target. And since you weren't in a colony it made you vulnerable since you were alone. You couldn’t afford a search party for you because they wanted revenge.

“What are your next plans? From where did you- wait,” You took a careful step forward, sniffing all of them as they stared at you in confusion. “Is that cologne I smell? What- Where did you come from.”

They looked at each other, seemingly debating something with just their gazes. It caught your eye, and you already knew that the next answer was well calculated. Meaning it would probably be a lie.

“We’re alone.”

You scoffed. Bullshit, they were definitely from somewhere. You didn't know if they think you were stupid, but if they do, they’re horribly wrong.

“You really want me to believe that? I doubt it, you don’t just come here smelling like a flower and having clean clothes if you’re not from a colony. Besides, Kai and Machete have a perfectly shaved beard. So, I’m gonna ask you again. Where are you headed and where are you from?” You swayed your gun tauntingly and Machete cleared his throat when he realized you talked about him. “It’s Colin.”

You rolled your eyes and ignored him.

“Peter.” He looked up at your shotgun, and he gulped at the sight.

“Where did you get that apple?” He simply blinked as he kept looking down at your weapon.

“The grocery store?”

You could see the other three brothers facepalm. But it set a smile on your lips as your theory was proven true. There were grocery stores in colonies and they sold products like apples who were harvested. Which meant that they were indeed in a colony so they lied to you. Which also meant that you couldn’t trust the words that would come out of their mouth next.

The boy seemed smart enough to see your thought process, and sighed in defeat as he closed his eyes. “We got kicked out.”

“How in god's name did you manage to do that?” You looked puzzled. Getting kicked out of a colony is one of the worst punishments, and it's also really rare.

Kai rolled his eyes and Peter started talking again.

“We got kicked because this idiot right here, wanted to leave the colony for some girl named Violet and literally left the Colony grounds, twice might I add! Thank you very much. Oh and also because this prick started a fucking cult,”

“It’s not a fucking cult.” Kai interjected but Peter rolled his eyes.

“We were lucky they didn’t threw us out at the start of this shithell. I can’t tell you how many times we almost got kicked out. This time the decision of the Council was final, and we had to leave. Luckily they let us have my Rosa. The only unproblematic thing in the world, me included of course.”

“Shut up idiot.” Tate hit the back of his head and Peter looked insulted as he rubbed the spot.

Colin looked down, thinking about something before he spoke up.

“How about you, are you in a colony?”

You didn’t expect that question. You opened and closed your mouth like a fish, wanting to say something but before you had a chance to do so, Kai rudely rolled his eyes.

“Can’t you see it? She smells like shit, of course she doesn’t have a colony.”

Your shotgun was immediately pointed at Kai, and your face was almost red out of anger. They didn’t know what sacrifices you had to make to get here. They didn’t know what you had to do to survive to get here. They didn’t know anything.

He then decided to go one step further by lowering his hands and crossing them over his chest. “Look little girl, that gun probably isn’t even load-.” You aimed your weapon at his head, cocking it before he could finish his sentence.

“Wanna try that theory out?”

“Do it.” He spat back, and it felt like you were in one of those western movies where it was the question who was gonna pull out their gun first. With a zoom in on both eyes for dramatic effect. Only this time, you were the only one with the weapon, you were the one with all the power, which felt good.

“Woah woah woah, easy Kai.” Colin tried to calm down the situation as he looked between you two, but you still weren't convinced with their intentions.

“What? We can figure out inside of twenty seconds whether or not you have what it takes to pull the trigger, if you wanted to shoot us you would’ve. You clearly want something else from us, otherwise you would've already taken our car and driven off.”

“Kai You’re gonna get us killed. Shut up.” Colin snarled at Kai, and he then put on a friendly face with a hint of sweat as he turned back to look at you. “My name is Colin like I previously said, this is Kai, Tate and Peter.” Peter waved at you as je smiled. “We’re from nowhere okay, we're traveling. Just give us the keys and we’ll be out of here in a matter of seconds. We won't harm you.”

Besides the ignorant little shit with the name Kai, the rest of the brothers seemed reasonable and decent. They didn’t look like Raiders. And for a split second after inspecting the group again, you thought of leaving them with their stuff. After all, if it were you, you also would've wanted someone to let you go. However, you had only gotten a few canned food and you didn't have much left in your Safe zone. If the situation was reversed, they’d probably leave with your stuff as well.

You wanted them to survive, but you needed the car and their stuff as well.

So you did the most reasonable thing.

“Alright, hands in the air and walk backwards, slowly. Unless you want this pretty boy here to join the rest of the Geeks in NowhereLand.”

“‘Pretty boy?” Kai said it with an amused tone, but you rolled your eyes and gritted your teeth. “I wasn’t talking about you, dimwit. Now do as I say and walk back slowly until I say you can stop.”

Peter seemed to want to protest but Colin shushed him and so the four boys held up their hands as they slowly stepped back until you were satisfied.

After they moved back far enough, you hesitated whether or not to take their weapons. You didn’t want them to try anything stupid. Then again, you knew night time was about to fall soon, so taking their weapons would most likely take away all their chances of survival. You decided to be reasonable and at least let them have something to defend themselves. 'Cause even though they were sketchy, they seemed decent. You weren't a total bitch.

“I’m sorry, I really am. I just need the ride.”

With that, you walked around the jeep, still facing the boys, and you got in and started the ignition. You couldn’t stop yourself from looking one more time in the rear view mirror, and you saw the four of them were already running towards you the second her gun was hidden. But you were faster, and you could see the brothers getting smaller and smaller as you drove away.

-

“Great, seriously great. Now we lost our ticket to Paradise. We’re not even a day in and we already got carjacked.” Tate threw his hands in the air, kicking a lost rock on the road. Which made Peter annoyed, and he looked at his brother, placing his hands on his hips.

“We could go back to our old colony. Oh wait, you were the whole reason we got kicked out in the first place! Actually, scrap that. You all, except for me and Colin, are the whole reason we got kicked out.”

Kai groaned hard and rubbed his hands on his face. “Peter, can you shut up for once in your life? It happened, now we need to find a way to fix it. We need to find a way to get that jeep back. And a way to get back at her. The last thing that bitch will see is the back of my fist.”

He stopped talking as his attention was elsewhere. In the distance they could all see the little figure of the black jeep getting smaller and smaller, and Kai sighed as he looked at his car.

“At least she let us keep Rosa.” Kai glared at Peter.

When the car was out of his sight, he then faced Tate. Tate got his crossbow in his hands, almost shooting an arrow into his foot, and Kai and Peter both mumbled something that looked like ‘unbelievable’.

Kai then felt anger boil at his younger brother.

“Tate, are you kidding me? You had a perfect shot at her! Why did you shoot my jeep?”

Tate wanted to say something but Kai was already first. “You know what, never mind. Forget I even asked.”

Tate simply rolled his eyes at Kai as he walked away while cursing them all underneath his breath, and Colin watched Peter gaze. Peter has always been clumsy, not really the smartest or strongest. But his puzzled face indicated he was thinking hard, probably about the next plan. Even though he was terrible at a lot of things, at least he was trying. He was good at one thing though; running and his reflexes seemed to be out of this world.

After a few minutes Colin decided to speak up from next to them.

“Did you recognize that girl?” He asked Peter, and Peter shook his head. “No, I don’t think so. Why?”

Colin looked back down, fumbling with his fingers. “I don’t know, it’s just. I know her face from somewhere but I can’t remember where from.”

“I doubt it. Maybe you recognized her from some girl back in our old colony?”

“No, I swear she… She just looks familiar.” Colin sighed.

“Maybe later you’ll remember again. Now let's focus on our problem. We need to find shelter before sundown. Then make a plan on how to somehow get that jeep back.” Colin thought about their old colony. It was pretty stupid to be thrown out of it, but to be honest it was kind of a relief to him.

Ever since everything went down the drain, he and his brothers had the fortunate opportunity to land in a community. A colony where he and his brothers had made many allies, a colony where everyone participated in something to benefit the community, which kept it going. And although everything seemed fine - the place kept thriving, he just had a gut feeling. Like he was trapped. He had never seen the outside world after he’d seen everything fall apart, and he wondered what was left of the population.

But as soon as they stepped out of their colony, Colin already had his answer.

There was no one left.

Well… aside from the girl who stole their jeep. And the debris from destroyed buildings and lost hope. He guessed it was just their luck to cross paths with a survivor who was going to steal their ride. Thinking about it, Colin was always unlucky when it was about girls. One stole their jeep, one left him out of nowhere. One got sho-

“You okay?” Peter’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he looked disoriented before his brother looked at him with a worried look.

“Yeah, fine. What were you saying?” Colin rubbed his temples and Peter cleared his throat. “Maybe we can stay here?”

“No way, have you not seen the windows? They're all broken. We need four solid walls and a roof.” Peter seemed to hesitate for a moment again, before Colin's face lit up. “I know where we can go. Remember that mall Tate used to hate?” Peter had to think for a short while before he nodded. “If we go in that direction, we’ll arrive at my old high school. It’s about 20 minutes away from here. It’s our safest bet if we want to get shelter before sundown.”

“Okay, then it’s settled, we go to the high school and tomorrow we make a plan.”

[alpimerealmsystem]

About Us!

To start this off, we're a RAMCOA and mixed origins system, that bothers you? Feel free to leave

Now that that's over with, hi! Nice to meet ya, welcome to the chaos. The main side who runs this blog is Manik, he's an Angel Dust fictive from Hazbin Hotel and goes by any pronouns :) He's our front anchor and host, and we rely on him for a lot of stability in the system. Another host we have is Kringe, although he's mostly in co-con, he may fuck around here sometimes tho!

Our system origins are fucking weird but we're a distorpid system + esogenic + gateway + delusionbased + HC-DID + cephaloconcious system however even though we are an HC-DID system we still just call ourselves endogenic because it's easier and fits us better. We have a duplex system (sharing a system completely, our "innerworld" is the same) with our honorary sibling @oxygenatedbots

About the system - We're a system of 800+ as of last updated, but our system is forever growing and we consider it to be eternal. We also are uncomfortable with the terms alters/headmates being used for us due to our origins and prefer the terms sides/sysmates when referring to us. Of course, you can also just use our names. Most sides originate due to spirtual beliefs but we believe trauma has also majorly influenced our system, with that being said, we are primarily endogenic and have decided we have been plural for a good while, but when we did "split" we were going through extreme trauma, so really we don't know what we split from but we do believe you dont have to split from trauma. Oh, also please don't use the word "innerworld" when referring to us! Call it Alpime or the Inneruniverse, thanks!

DM me asking for a cat pic to cheer you up, I shall deliver

SEND ME ASKS FOR STUFF YOU WANT ME TO TALK ABOUT. We'll post poetry, short stories, alterhumanity, non-humanity and system related things if ya ask!

Pronouns ~ Collectively He/They/Thrive/Grow/Way/Path//Point/World/Cosmo/Void/Planet/Star/Moon/Night/Astro/Dark/Shadow/Spirit/Glow/Glimpse/Ghost/Fade/Dreary/Corrupt/Virus/Hack/Glitch/Music/Song

Kintypes ~ Voidkin and snow leopard therian. (But I will say, our voidkin identity is heavily influenced on being a plural system)

About me ~ The body is minor so please be aware of that. Anyways I'm a proud mom to three cats, love them all equally (we know that's a lie) we can't get any diagnosises due to our own situation irl however we are self diagnosed with a lot- so here's the full list. DID, anxiety, depression, OCD, NPD, BPD, schizophrenia, autism and ADHD. BPD and OCD tend to collectively be shared across the system to a more extreme extent, but specifically OCD, and we all tend to experience both of those very similarly. We consider ourselves mentally and physically disabled, even though we can't get a diagnosis for anything due to personal reasons we know at least we are limited in a lot of areas. About the physical disability we don't know exactly what it is but we experience constant lightheadedness and sometimes blurry vision and it genuinely negatively impacts our daily life

Posting schedule ~ we post poems sometimes! Depends on motivation levels and how busy we are but that's actually why we started this blog! and then depending on other shit sometimes we'll do short stories, system posts and alterhumanity related posts. Yes this blog is chaotic, yes atm it's mainly reblogs, no we don't give a fuck.

Stuffs I write ~ I write a lot of darker topics in my poetry such as us ruining the world, mental health, etc. I do put trigger warnings on some of my posts so please keep this in mind y'all. About my short stories, I wrote partially just fiction stuff or I may start with a prompt. The other half of the stuff I write is going to be werewolf/Lycanthropy/therianthropy themed!

DNI ~ Idgaf who interacts anymore, if I don't like you I'll block you but just be aware of our identities and apply your DNI to us, if we're in it get the fuck out. We're probably that freak in your DNI anyways (totally stolen from a friend, love ya!)

Misc ~ PLEASE GIVE ME RECOMMENDATIONS!!! Feel free to *flood* my inbox with requests, I will get to them! I'd seriously love to know what y'all want for short stories and poetry! If you give me a recommendation it will be a bonus post and not one of my daily things! Spam likes are fine, welcome, and appreciated! It's always great to know what y'all enjoy. Feel free to ask as many questions as you want about my writing and also criticise me! I'm totally welcome to take y'all's advice and I'd love to improve on my work! Also feel free to send me drafts for poems, I will make them my own style and give you full credit for the ideas and how it was executed ^^

About the blog-ish: Different sides may post certain things, some will leave sign offs, others won't, but be aware of this. My blog is not a place of hate or to discriminate, I want this to be a safe space. Do not come to my blog being a bitch, or saying my beliefs are not valid, or saying other's beliefs are not valid. I will block anyone who says stuff like that. This blog is centered around writing, alterhumanity and system shit. If I fuck some info up in a post TELL ME. I do research everything but I've had some angry people dming me, please politely say I messed up info and don't scream at me. I am trying my best, but my best isn't always perfectly accurate. I primarily speak from my own experiences but when I don't I'm relying on the beautiful thing we call the Internet and opinions vary on here. I want to make my content as accurate and relatable as possible so please do tell me if I mess up. This blog also mentions mental health and trauma occasionally so typically I do put TWs. Anyways, that's all! Love ya!

I need friends, feel free to reach out (especially if a system, would love more system friends. Also only minors, bc the body is sadly

I think that's it, thanks!

Last updated ~ April 4, 2024 - Manik