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#but i lose all the anger and fight like a sentence in
em1989ts · 8 hours
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𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒆 - 𝒑𝒕. 2
five hargreeves x reader
word count: 1.7k
part one. part two.
summary: after you discovered a deli full of alternate versions of your cheating husband, you realize they would never hurt you the way he did. once he finds you getting comfortable with another version of him, you'll have to work together to figure out how to save the world.
authors note: thank you so much for all the notes on part one! i appreciate it so much since i thought no one would ever see it. here's the highly requested part two, enjoy!
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You could tell it was him right away. Your Five had burst into the deli like he was crashing a wedding. When you walked in, every Five had a look of awe displayed across his face, but now that look was replaced with anger and disappointment. 
You could tell Five had shrunk a bit under the gaze of his counterparts yet he firmly walked over to the booth where you were sitting with the new Five that you had been talking to. He had a shameful look in his eye yet held a stoic visage. Glancing down at your gentle hands still firmly held in the palms of the other Five, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked between the two of you.
“What- what is this?” He scoffed in an annoyed manner, like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing yet somehow he knew exactly what was happening. 
The Five across from you gently released your hands as his eye twitched and he stood up and faced your Five. Even though they were both exactly the same height, you could tell they were challenging each other by standing up a little straighter, your Five standing slightly on his toes.
 New Five had an angry clench in his jaw yet held a slight smirk. He addressed your Five in a low tone, “You must be a fluke if you think you can just apologize and win her back because there’s not a single Five in this room that would hurt her the way you did.” 
You looked up at the two of them from your seat in the booth. You hadn’t mentioned how your Five had hurt you, what he’d done to lose you. How could this Five have known? Still however, you appreciated his defense. You had always thought it’d be pathetic to see two guys fight over you, but to see two versions of the same man, one who has hurt and wronged you and the other who holds an unconditional and undying love for you, it ignited a spark in you that you thought you’d never feel again in your existence. 
Existence. 
Once the new Five finished his sentence you could see the offense on your Five’s face as he prepared a rebuttal but you shut that down quickly. 
“Enough,” you held a hand out as if to break the aggressive tension between them, “this is irrelevant. We need to discuss a plan.” 
Your Five took this as an opportunity to occupy the seat next to you in the booth but new Five beat him to it by pulling him back by the arm and sliding in next to you, as well as placing a hand on your thigh. 
Your Five was taken aback by the action yet quickly regained his composure as he settled into the seat across from the two of you. 
Waiter Five stopped by once again to drop off another mug of coffee for your Five as well as to top of your mug and Five’s. You thanked him and took a sip as he waltzed away with a wink. You watched as your Five took a sip from his mug which he immediately spit back out. The deli of Fives erupted in laughter as both you and your Five looked around confused. 
The Five sitting next to you whispered an explanation in your ear, stating that Waiter Five had poured a couple of salt packets into his coffee rather than sugar. You grinned and hid your laugh in the shoulder of the Five next to you, him still facing you, your foreheads nearly touching. Your Five watched with a heartache as he dabbed his mouth with a napkin and set it back down on the table. 
The laughter had mostly died down, excluding a very sloshed and disheveled looking Five who continued to chuckle and hiccup while leaning against a door. 
You were still leaning slightly onto the Five next to you as he spoke, “So I take it you figured out the subway system by now” 
“Alternate versions of the same moment in time?” Five asked.
“Correct,” the other Five responded, “We’re all you from alternate timelines. Most of us here have given up on trying to fix the broken timeline.” 
Your Five listened with a befuddled look on his face and before he could question the words of the Five before him, you piped up an explanation, “It’s us who shattered the original timeline.” 
“Thank you, dear,” said the Five next to you as he brought an arm around your shoulder. You couldn’t tell if he was being this affectionate because he really missed his y/n or because he could see how badly it was ticking your Five off but either way you wanted to play along, leaning into his affection. 
He broke your gentle eye contact to once again address the Five glaring at you both.
“The timeline was shattered the moment we came into existence, leaving us with an infinite number of alternate timelines in an infinite loop of trying to save the world,” he said in a tired voice. 
You took a moment to really look at him, he looked so exhausted. 
So did your timeline’s Five.
So did Drunk Five, Waiter Five, and Brisket Five. 
Sure they looked content in the deli, as it was their place to escape, but the tired looks in their eyes really showed how hard they had tried and how worn out it made them. 
You didn’t realize it but you were staring so deeply into the eyes of your timeline’s Five. With such a soft look he thought would never come his way again. You felt sorry for him. You really did but there is nothing that could excuse everything he did. Nothing could excuse the betrayal and heartbreak he caused you. That was his fault and he would have to deal with every ounce of guilt and shame that accompanied him in his downfall. 
His eyes met yours, the green shining with sorrow as he attempted to convey all his feelings through his irises. You both knew your relationship would never be the same, even if you survived the Cleanse. There was just too much that couldn’t be undone. 
You broke the connection first, turning away to look at the tiled floor of the deli instead. 
Your Five continued to look at you. 
Your eyes. Your hair. 
He never could’ve loved Lila like he loved you, how could he have thrown you away so easily? 
His love for you was what kept his fire burning all these years. His love for you ignited his passion for saving the world,  just so you could live safely. 
Just so you could live without surviving on cockroaches or the roof of a crumbling library. 
Just so you could live without having to kill in fear of being killed. 
Just so you could live a happy and comfortable life, even if it no longer meant a life with him. 
You clenched your jaw in thought before turning to the Five next to you, “What can we do? I mean, there has to be a way out of this.” 
He looked at you with an answer he was sure you wouldn’t like, “The only way this cycle will end is if you cease to exist. You have to let the marigold combine with the durango in the Cleanse.” 
You raised a brow, “Just the marigold?” 
Five looked at you confused, “Yes, the marigold infected our mothers the moment the timeline was shattered.” 
“So it’s not actually us that’s the problem?” You waved your finger in a circle, gesturing to yourself, Five, and his absent siblings. 
“Technically not,” Five confirmed. 
You leaned back into the seat as Five returned his arm to his side. You bit your lip as you tried to remember anything that might help you come up with a plan, then it hit you. 
Viktor. 
You remember how he told everyone that when he lived on the farm back in Dallas, he saved Harlan, the little boy who drowned in the lake, by giving him some of his marigold. 
You also remembered that he was able to take away the marigold in the barn, and whatever was left back at Hotel Obsidian. 
You lifted your head, your eyes bright as the idea swirled in your mind. 
You brought your hands onto the table, finding that you explain best with random hand motions, “What about Viktor, he could absorb our marigolds and transfer out his own into the Cleanse. That way the marigold and durango meet but we won’t have to die, we just won’t have our powers again.” 
Both Fives were silent for a moment as they contemplated your plan. The Five next to you was the first to react by holding your face in his palms and planting a kiss between your brows. “Darling,” he admired, “You’re an absolute genius.” 
Your timeline’s Five frowned in disagreement and jealousy, “What about Ben? If we combine our marigold with the Cleanse then he’ll die in there.” 
“That Ben was an asshole anyway,” you shrugged, honestly not caring since he was the reason you were in this dilemma in the first place. 
He hummed in agreement, not able to argue with you on that. He stood up and so did the other Five so he could let you out of the booth. 
Your Five didn’t want to hang around for goodbyes, you had come up with a plan and that was that. He grabbed your arm and tugged you towards the door. The other Five quickly grabbed your other arm to hold you in place. 
“Once this is all over, don’t go back to him. There are plenty of Fives here who will treat you so much better,” he winked at you as cheers of agreement ensued across the deli. 
A blush came across your face as you looked around at the hopeful smiles of every Five in the room. 
Maybe you didn’t have to stop loving Five.
You just had to let go of one. 
You slightly nodded and winked back at Five as he let go of your arm, letting your Five tug you back towards the subway with an upset stomp. Looking back with a little wave, you walked out as Drunk Five yelled, “Auf wiedersehen!” 
authors note: hopefully you guys enjoy! originally i didn't plan on making a part two but i'm glad you guys liked it so much. my inbox is open for any requests and please let me know your thoughts in the comments!
taglist: @madscamp02 @buttermilkpetals @leitor-sonolento @ren-ren23 @alavit @tofueater78 @buzzbuzzlilbee @clownwritesfanfic @beanzwritez @pholuvre
(hopefully i did this right??)
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lilgynt · 2 years
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i really do need to stop thinking about this fight but i’m legitimately gonna blow my brains out about it
#personal#like i just keep doing the same loots on the train of thoughts about it#and like as a kid i always has moments after fights were i was like#i’m never talking to him again and then he’s gonna realize how awful he is#and then like next day i’m talking to him bc my big brother is my favorite person ever#but like. i keep imagining scenarios where i can correctly explain myself and he’s listening#but i lose all the anger and fight like a sentence in#i just can’t do it#it’s not gonna change and he can’t hear me and i just can’t do it#and that makes me so fucking depressed im just fighting back tears rn#and i want to be fair to him i really do#and i’m always gonna be more biased to myself bc. well. you know#but god he’s done awful things to me#he ruined the word fag he outted me he’s said genuinely nasty and cruel things i’ve never said to him#not that i haven’t been awful back#god im getting tired explaining even this#and then i just keep thinking about how much he must hate me and that hurts worse bc i love him and i know i’m not a positive force in his#life im just like an annoying hurdle you enjoy sometimes but more out of familarity than anything else#and everyone in my family vastly prefers him and i don’t blame them!!!#i remember being a kid and seeing him get some kind of reading reward#and i was so. upset with myself bc i wasn’t like him. and i was jealous#but mostly i remember clapping super loud and thinking about how happy and proud of and for him i was#i just want him to stop treating me like i’m dumb and he says he doesn’t but he does#all the time#and i want him to stop trying to fix my problems all the time#and i feel awful that i was his responsibility unfairly for so long and im actively trying to get away from that role from him#i’m trying i’m trying and i’m trying but god above#i’m just so tired and so upset#and i’m starting to think i just cause issues on purpose#like i’m subconsciously bored bc this can’t just happening all the time to woe is me like i know i’m not but i have to be at this point
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0cta9on · 7 months
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FFF2+4
length: +2k words
Genre: Smut
Le Sserafim Sakura x Male Reader
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【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★
Your hand lazily inserts the key into your apartment and unlocks the door. You want to slam it behind you in anger, but you’re too tired to even manage that. Working at the convenience store was supposed to be easy, just a little side hustle you can do to make some cash while you go through school. However, you failed to anticipate the long and arduous days of being yelled at by customers over things you have no power over, all for minimum wage. Your piece of shit manager doesn’t make things easier as all she does is sit on her phone while you’re the one that has to run around like a dog just to maintain the store. With a heavy sigh, you collapse face-first into the couch, just barely fighting the urge to suffocate in between the cushions and end your suffering once and for all.
“You good?”
You turn your attention to your roommate Sakura, who’s sitting on the floor, immersed in a fighting game on the TV. Sakura seldom talks and has a bit of an unnerving air about her, but she always kept the common areas clean and upheld her side of the chores so you considered her to be the perfect roommate in your book. You’ve managed to warm up to each other a little bit over the years, yet she always remained as sort of an enigma to you. You rarely talked due to always being busy with work or school, but whenever you did see her, she was always playing some kind of video game. Supposedly she makes money from streaming herself playing these games to thousands of people. You didn’t really understand, but you didn’t really need to anyway.
Your body slides off the couch onto the floor next to her, your eyes glazing over the flashing colors on the screen. “I’m fine,” you utter. “What are you playing?”
“Tekken 8,” she answers, her eyes never leaving the screen. “You wanna play?”
“I think I’ll stick to watching you.” Video games were never really your thing, but you could admire how skillful Sakura looked with the way her slender fingers quickly pressed the right buttons at the right time, her eyes glaring with focus. The blue light of the TV reflects off of her pale skin, making her look ethereal despite wearing a simple crop top and a pale blue tracksuit. Since when did Sakura look so attractive?
Before you knew it, you were suddenly face to face with the back of Sakura’s blonde head, your legs splayed out on either side of her. She was too focused on the game to notice you pressing up against her, which you took as a sign to take things further. Maybe it was the exhaustion and the stress seeping its way into your brain, but you needed some kind of release and Sakura just happened to be at the right place at the right time. 
Your hands slowly snake their way up her toned abs, grazing her soft skin with your fingertips and stopping at the hem of her top. Sakura hasn’t made any move to stop you, you wonder if she even noticed you at all. You lift up her top, pleasantly surprised to see her wearing no bra underneath. Her breasts are the perfect size and shape to fit into the palms of your hands, soft yet firm like a stress ball. With each gentle squeeze, all the stress you procured over the day begins to drain from your body, and your erection starts to strain against your pants, pressing into Sakura’s lower back. Lust takes over your body as your breath gets heavier and your heart pounds in your chest. Your lips latch onto the back of her exposed neck, kissing and licking her porcelain skin.
“You’re gonna make me lose,” she says, her voice monotone. You momentarily pause to chuckle at her nonchalance. Her body was being ravished by her roommate, yet all she cared about was winning her little game. You found it oddly cute in a weird way.
“Sorry,” you chuckle, punctuating your sentence with a kiss on her neck. “How about this? If you win while I play with your body, I’ll give you $10.”
“Make it $20 and I’ll let you fuck me afterward.”
“Deal.” Almost immediately, your hand lunges into the waistband of her pants while your other hand pinches Sakura’s nipples. To your surprise, her panties had a sizable wet spot on them - despite her lack of a reaction, she was way into this. As you apply pressure against the wet spot, you hear her breath hitch in her throat, her body shivering upon contact. You had her right where you wanted her.
As much as you would love to take your time to make her feel good, you also didn’t want to easily give up the $20 you worked so hard for. You move her panties to the side to give you easier access to the honey pot lying underneath. Her lips were already coated in her slick juices as you teased her hole with your digits. A small groan escapes her mouth right as she wins the first round with a sliver of health left.
“Ooooh, that was a close one, Kkura,” you tease, chuckling into her ear. “Maybe this’ll be easier than I thought.”
Sakura stays quiet, her focus on the game unwavering. Right as the second round starts, you shove two fingers deep inside her hot, velvety core, eliciting a cute moan from the Japanese girl. The slickness of her arousal coats your fingers, allowing you to thrust in and out of her with ease. The texture of her inner walls is like silk wrapped around steel - soft and smooth, yet firm and unyielding. You watch with enjoyment as Sakura slowly becomes undone. Lustful moans continued to escape her lips, and her fingers began to spaz out with each thrust of your hand, causing her character to lose health. Her grip on the controller tightened with frustration but quickly dissipates as you continue to finger her pussy. Miraculously, she somehow managed to win the second round, albeit with a smaller margin than before.
“Hmm, I guess I should start trying now, huh?” You quicken the pace of your hand while your thumb rubs against her clit, sending shockwaves of pleasure through Sakura’s body. Her breathy moans fill the air as she tries desperately to ignore the lust threatening to take over her body. The walls of her pussy tighten around your fingers as she grows closer to her orgasm, her hips rocking subtly with each thrust, inadvertently rubbing her butt against your erection. Your breath grew heavy with excitement, but you didn’t want to end the fun just yet. Right when you think she’s about to cum, you remove your hand from her heat, denying her the satisfaction of a release. Sakura turns to you with a fire in her eyes, causing her to lose her first round.
You chuckle in her face. “What’s with that look?” you ask, taunting her with a sly smirk. From all your years of knowing her, this is the most emotion you have ever seen her display. You couldn’t help but find it cute how much she wanted to cum.
“Whatever…” She grumbles in annoyance before turning back to the screen. You place a gentle kiss on the back of her neck, a symbol of your apology. However, you aren’t apologizing for not taking her all the way. In fact, this is an apology made in advance - you’re about to make things so much more difficult for her.
Instead of pulling the trigger and assaulting her wetness like she wants you to, you decide to tease her by gently rubbing your fingers over the cloth of her crotch, applying just enough pressure for her to feel it but not enough for her to get off. Your other hand traces gentle circles on her breasts, tickling her skin with your fingernails. Sakura lets out a huff of irritation. She so badly wanted to feel your fingers inside of her, but unfortunately for her, her pride was stronger than her lust, and throwing the game for her own pleasure was just not a viable option. Her sexual frustration gets the better of her and the poor girl ends up losing the round in a complete stomp, leaving just one more round to decide whether or not you would be out $20.
“Ugh…” She groans while pinching the bridge of her nose.
“What’s the matter? Just one more win and you get $20, easy as pie,” you say, smirking mischievously. Sakura simply shrugged it off, putting all her attention into the game, but little did she know how dirty you planned on playing the final round.
Right as the in-game announcer starts the final round, you push Sakura forward so that she’s now on all fours, her perfect ass in the air. Despite the compromising change in position, she kept her grip on her controller and her focus on winning. You didn’t let her stay comfortable for long as you grabbed the waistband of her velvet sweatpants and pulled it down along with her panties, exposing her plump cheeks in one fell swoop. Her pussy stains her thighs with her sweet nectar, ready for you to ravish her hole. All your patience is about to pay off as you free your erection from its prison, lining it up with Sakura’s core. With one thrust, you completely bottom out inside of her, causing a high-pitched moan to come out of her mouth. Your fingers sink into the plush flesh of her hips, pulling her towards you with each thrust. The sight of her modest yet plump ass vibrating with an audible slap of skin against skin is worth way more than $20, yet here you are, enjoying it all for free. Sakura’s pussy squeezes your cock with her slick walls, her climax quickly approaching thanks to the work of your fingers earlier.  At this point, your roommate was a complete mess in front of you, dropping her controller and letting her opponent knock out her character without any fight. Right as the big red “DEFEAT” pops up on the screen, Sakura lets out a long moan, announcing her orgasm. You hold her hips down on the base of your cock as her body shakes with pleasure, her juices spilling down your legs and staining your work pants.
Sakura collapses onto the ground as you pull out of her, giving you a moment to catch your breath. As much as you would love to dump your entire load into her pretty pussy, you decide to show her mercy in this instance. Games aren’t fun if you win them right away.
Slowly, Sakura props herself up. Her chest rises and falls with each heavy breath and you can’t help but become mesmerized by her breasts. In turn, she stares at your dick, still glistening with her nectar. She discards her disheveled clothing, and like a kitten stalking its prey, she crawls towards you with unblinking eyes. Normally, her face void of emotion would be hard to read, but at this moment, you knew exactly what she was thinking. Her lips hungrily latch onto yours as she straddles your lap, grasping onto your cock to line it up with her dripping cunt. Your hands automatically gravitate towards her hips as you pull her down onto your lap, forcing her to take all of you at once. Sakura groans into your mouth, wrapping her arms around your head and pulling you deeper into the sloppy kiss. 
As she bounces on your dick, you completely forget about all the shit you faced at work. Hell, you would gladly work at the shit hole if it meant getting to fuck your cute roommate every day. The thought gets you more excited as you meet Sakura’s hips with thrusts of your own, simultaneously breaking the kiss to suckle on her perfect bouncing tits. Her shrill moans and the slaps of your skin against hers fill your ears, driving you closer to the edge.
“S-Sakura… I’m about to c-cum…” You warn her, breathless.
“I-inside… C-cum inside me…”
With your grip tightened on her waist, you slam her down onto your cock, forcing your entire length inside as you shoot ropes of your semen into her cunt. Sakura meets your orgasm with one of her own, her pussy pulsating and milking your cock. Her body collapses onto you as both of you catch your breath.
“Well, that was something,” you say to fill the empty space. Sakura answers with a hot shaky breath against your neck. Five minutes pass before her breathing finally comes back to normal. “Soooo… Same time tomorrow?” You ask, half-jokingly. Sakura gets up from your neck with the same blank expression as always. 
“Don’t keep me waiting.”
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brokenmenswhore · 1 month
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Hey hey! I love your Aegon fics so much that I want to know if you would write a story where after your kid with Aegon passed away, he promised never to touch you again so you wouldn't have to endure bearing more of his kids and witnessing their death. But you yearn for your husband every night and will act dirty to make him touch you again. By acting dirty I mean doing sexy things to instigate him when he's alone with you.
of all the things in this life that i’m good at, being intentionally sexy is NOT one of them, so i’m hoping this isn’t awkward :) my biggest fear is that someone’s gonna not like what i write for their request i’m on my knees pls don’t hate me
all in | aegon ii targaryen
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pairing: aegon targeryen x fem!reader
warnings: angst, mentions of a deceased child, smut (MDNI 18+)
────── ☾ ──────
It had been three long, dark, and lonely months since the death of your son.
He passed away at only a few weeks of age due to health complications, and both you and your husband, Aegon, were left devastated.
Aegon had a tendency to blame himself for anything negative in his life, his self hatred running through the depths of his soul. Your son was his heir, and he felt as if he lost a piece of himself, and blamed himself for the health issues your child was having. “It must be from me,” he would whisper to himself, almost incapable of accepting that some things he could not be faulted for.
When Grand Maester Orwyle proclaimed your son dead, Aegon broke. He was hysterical, unable to speak, the only sound from his lips was an occasional scream of anger and sadness. You grieved in private, the joy you felt from your son’s birth still so recent that your stomach was still not yet back to a normal state.
The first few weeks were hard on both of you, but you at least attempted to lean on each other. However, Aegon was difficult to console when he got in his own head. You were both laying awake in bed, comforting one another when your hand ran across his chest, toying with his shirt. As difficult as the week had been, you were desperate to feel close to your husband in some capacity other than sadness and grief.
Aegon sighed and moved your hand away, rolling over on his side and turning his back toward you. You stayed stagnant and stared at him for a moment. “Aegon?”
“We can’t.”
“I know this grief is still very new, but I-“
“We can’t, ever.”
You sat in disbelief. Tears threatened to spill from your eyes at his words. You were in need of comfort, as was Aegon, and his declaration frustrated you. “And why not?”
“I refuse to risk putting you through this again.”
You were speechless. You tried to think of something to say, a few small noises leaving your lips as you tried to begin a sentence, but to no avail.
Aegon could hear your attempts. “What you have been through these past few weeks- I cannot watch you bear another one of my children, only to endure the pain of losing them again. I have never seen you happier than the day our son was born, and now-“ Aegon’s voice trailed off, “It is not worth the risk.”
Tears of sadness and frustration were now freely falling, Aegon’s back still to you as you spoke, “you do not seriously intend for us to never be intimate again. For the rest of our lives, Aegon, I need you. I am all in. Are you not? Do you not need me as well?”
“I need to relieve you of this pain more,” he responded, “and there are more than enough whores in King’s Landing.”
Your breath hitched in your throat at his final comment. You couldn’t believe he said such a thing. You knew he was hurting, and oftentimes pushed you away when he was, and you decided to assume it was an intentionally harmful comment meant to do just that. You chose to believe that he didn’t really mean it, but you still wished he didn’t say it. You understood his pain, but that didn’t make it alright to take it out on you.
You didn’t dignify his comment with a response, you simply rolled out of bed, fighting to maintain your composure as you walked out of the room, slowly shutting the door behind you.
The next morning, you returned to your shared chambers to ready yourself for the day, and Aegon was already up and dressing.
“Where did you sleep?” he asked.
You untied your robe as you approached the outfit laid out for you by your handmaidens. Handmaidens stopped assisting you and Aegon without being called into the room, as per your marital request.
“Elsewhere,” you stated.
Aegon sighed. “That is not an answer.”
“Why should it matter to you? If you get lonely, you can simply bed your whores,” you spat, throwing his comment from last night back at him.
Aegon didn’t handle you being mad at him very well. He needed everyone to like him at all times, but he didn’t cherish anyone’s opinion of him as much as he did yours. Knowing you were upset with him killed him.
“Do not be upset with me,” he pleaded, standing behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Oh? I thought we were not to touch each other any longer?”
Aegon retracted his arms, moving directly next to you so he could catch your eyes. “I don’t want you to be upset,” he said.
“Then do not promise to deprive me of something you and I both want and need.”
“I cannot put you through this again. Do you not understand that? Whatever is going on within me, it passed something bad down to our child, and if we remain intimate I risk you falling pregnant with another child we will inevitably lose. As your husband, it is my duty to ensure you do not have to go through such a thing again.”
“It is out of your control, Aegon,” you said, your voice low as you held his face in your palms, “and it is not your fault.”
He held onto your wrists, but didn’t move your hands. “This decision is not meant to hurt you.”
“I know.” Aegon was set in his decision, which meant that there was no point in arguing with it right now. You did not have the energy.
────── ☾ ──────
The next several weeks were filled with longing, your heart and body yearning to be close to your husband, now that it had been three whole months since your son passed.
You didn’t press the subject with Aegon, allowing him room to breathe. It was difficult, and you found yourself needing him more and more the longer you went without him.
You knew that despite his decisions, you always had power over Aegon. He was completely enamored with you, and oftentimes changed his mind to match yours. When he made decisions you didn’t agree with, it took a hell of a lot of fighting to get him to falter, but it was not always impossible. This particular instance couldn’t be impossible- you couldn’t survive without him.
“We we supposed to depart last hour!” Aegon called out to you, waiting by the door with his guards for you, the hour getting later and later. House Dondarrion was hosting the Targaryen family for supper at Blackhaven as a gesture of appreciation for the King’s assistance in the Stormlands.
Your handmaidens tightened and tied the final strings of your corset. It was new, and made specifically for you, only this time, you made special requests. It was the standard green and gold, and still kept you covered, but less so than usual. The garment left your chest nearly exposed, just as you had planned.
“They must have forgotten your measurements, Your Grace, there is not nearly enough fabric,” one of your handmaidens spoke, fidgeting with the seam on your cleavage.
“It will do just fine, thank you very much,” you said, “we must be going.”
You were escorted to meet up with your husband, who couldn’t look away from you the moment you came into view.
“What the fuck is this?” he whispered the moment you were next to him.
“What ever do you mean?”
“Everyone here can see too much of you in that,” he continued.
You shrugged your shoulders, playing nonchalantly dumb. “They must have forgotten my measurements.”
You gazed up at him, and he could tell you were playing him. He knew you well enough to tell.
“What are you trying to do?”
You brushed your hair from your neck to behind your shoulder, making even more skin come into view. “Waiting to leave. We are already behind, are we not?”
You started to walk away, but Aegon grabbed your arm and pulled you back. “You can’t possibly think I’m going to let you leave in such a thing.”
“It is not your choice.”
Aegon knew that despite the roles placed on both of you from a very young age, he couldn’t control you if he tried.
Throughout supper, Aegon was on alert to the gazes of other gentlemen upon his wife. Many approached you two to offer their condolences for the loss of your son, making you tense up and your breathing quicken from stress, which only made your chest more obvious.
You could tell Aegon was bothered, but that’s what you wanted, so you made no effort to be modest.
“Rather lewd tonight,” Aemond said, standing behind your chair, greeting you for the first time all night, “don’t you think?”
“Perhaps,“ you responded, taking a sip from your cup.
Aemond leaned down next to your ear and whispered, “What’s he done then, hm?”
You giggled at the question, Aemond smiling as he stood tall and moved to greet the people next to you, ending your interaction. Aegon couldn’t hear what Aemond said, but Aemond being so close to you and whispering in your ear angered him.
“What did he say?” Aegon asked, unable to help the curiosity.
“Nothing of importance,” you said, remaining stoic.
Aegon’s nostrils flared as another member of House Dondarrion approached the table.
Aegon remained observant the entire night, a possessiveness consuming him as he intentionally stared at anyone who gawked at you, his gaze intimidating them into looking away.
When you returned to King’s Landing, you retreated to your shared chambers.
“It does not befit a queen to dress in such a vulgar way. I cannot fathom why you would do such a thing tonight,” Aegon said.
You poured two cups of wine as you replied, “you cannot fathom? Dear husband, I think you can. Take a guess as to why I may behave as such.”
You handed Aegon one of the cups, taking a sip from your own and intentionally tilting it too far upward, the red liquid spilling down your neck and onto your chest.
“Fuck, what a shame,” you spoke, placing the cup down and moving your hair behind your back.
Aegon watched you swipe a thumb over your bottom lip and suck the wine off of it.
“Stop it,” he warned.
“Stop what? You cannot expect me to just stand here covered in wine,” you quipped, “do you happen to have a cloth?”
Aegon retrieved an used cloth from the table next to you, holding it out to you, as if to say ‘here’s the cloth you absolutely knew was there and only made me grab to mess with me.’
“I can’t see my own neck,” you said, “help me?”
Aegon sighed in frustration, moving the cloth to clean your chin, then your neck, moving it lower and lower. He watched the muscles in your neck flex as you swallowed, and he didn’t even think about holding his actions back before his lips were on your neck, cleaning off the wine with his tongue.
Your mouth opened and a small sigh left your lips, the feeling of his mouth on you after so fucking long making you needier than usual.
Aegon moved down to your breasts, licking and kissing the top flesh of one of your breasts before jolting back and wiping his mouth with the back of his sleeve. “No.”
“Aegon-“
“Please, I don’t think I’m strong enough for this.”
Aegon dropped the cloth back onto the table and marched out of the room, leaving you worked up and your breasts coated in wine. You let out a disappointed huff as you called your handmaidens in to run you a bath, hoping it would help you relax.
The next morning, Aegon had council business to attend to all day, but he had made an unfortunate mistake when you first wed: he told you that you were always welcome in council meetings, and that he would cut out the tongue of anyone who tried to speak against your presence there.
You swung open the doors to the council room, all heads turning toward you as you walked over to your husband.
“What is it?” Aegon asked, sitting taller and taller the closer you got to him.
“You said I was always welcome in these meetings, Your Grace.”
You seldom ever called Aegon by his title, but you knew that doing so drove him crazy. You noticed him shift slightly in his chair.
“The current matter of discussion is rather important,” he said.
“I would hope so, you’ve been in here all day,” you said, gripping the back of Aegon’s chair and pulling it with all your might, a seated Aegon inching a tiny bit away from the table. You were giving it your all, but could only move the chair a small amount back.
“What are you doing?” he asked, as the rest of the council just watched the scene play out. They knew better than to question you in these meetings.
You then sat yourself directly on Aegon, adjusting yourself so that you were comfortable in his lap, but he could still see the table. You were acting immature, but that was the point.
“This is entirely inappropriate,” he whispered into your ear, evidently tense. He was genuinely annoyed at you for sitting on his lap in the middle of a council meeting, but you didn’t care.
“I thought that was something you liked about me?” you whispered back into his ear.
You made brief eye contact. Aegon didn’t want to embarrass you in front of the Lords at the table, so he maintained a whisper. “Get up.”
You smiled, making the council think you were not in an argument, but rather exchanging a few private sentences before returning to duty. You leaned your head back so you were in his ear again. “No.”
“Your Grace,” Lord Commander of the King’s Guard and Hand of the King, Criston Cole, interrupted, “forgive me, but this is rather urgent.”
“Right then,” Aegon said, turning his attention back to the meeting as you remained on his lap.
The men all began to speak of war strategy and politically advantageous pairings, Aegon’s arm instinctively finding its way around your waist to keep you in place.
Every few minutes, you shifted your positioning, intentionally grinding down on his cock. He gripped your waist to try to stop you every time, but it never worked.
When the meeting was finished, you hopped up and left the room before Aegon could catch you.
Later in the day, he caught you walking alone to the library, and he pulled you into an adjacent hallway.
“Don’t ever do that again,” he warned, “that little stunt you pulled during my council meeting? Never again.”
“I do not know to what you refer,” you said, slowly pulling up one side of your dress, revealing more and more of your thigh until your entire leg was exposed, giving you room to dip your fingers underneath your dress.
“What are you-“
“It seems as though I’ve forgotten to put on anything under this dress,” you said, looking up at Aegon through hooded eyes.
“Don’t you dare,” he said, watching your hand disappear fully underneath your dress.
“Would not have to, if only I found myself a husband to do it for me.”
“Don’t,” Aegon demanded, grabbing your wrist and stilling your hand.
“Please,” you pleaded, desperation in your eyes as Aegon looked at you, nearly breaking.
Instead, he dropped your wrist, walking away from you again and leaving you alone.
────── ☾ ──────
When Aegon entered your chambers that night, you were already bathing. You were resting your head against the cool metal of the bathtub, your knees visible over the water, your body partially covered by the weak bubbles on the water’s surface. You opened your eyes when you heard the door open, and Aegon approached you, pulling one of your handmaiden’s stools next to the tub and taking a seat.
“What is it, Aegon?” you asked, re-relaxing and closing your eyes.
“What are you doing?” he asked, and you didn’t see it, but his eyes ran up and down the length of your body as he spoke.
“Bathing?” you answered, almost more of a question than an answer. What you were doing was blatantly obvious, so the question confused you slightly.
“If this is another one of your dirty tricks, it won’t work.”
You let out a deep breath. “It’s not, I really just wanted to relax.”
You opened your eyes, and Aegon cocked an eyebrow at you. “I’m serious, Aegon. I’ve tried enough, and it has not worked. I give up. That’s what you wanted, right?”
You meant it. You were tired of trying to work him up, instigate something, or be lustful, if it was never going to work. You were tired of throwing yourself at someone who clearly did not want you anymore.
Aegon didn’t respond, he just continued to watch you as you closed your eyes again, relaxing into the water. He could see most of your body beneath the surface of the clear liquid, the bubbles almost entirely dissipated.
You heard a small whisper of your name, but you kept your eyes closed, allowing yourself to continue winding down for the night.
Aegon reached out to run his hand over your knee, and the feeling made you jolt slightly, your eyes opening at the sudden contact. You gave Aegon a confused, somewhat concerned look.
“You would truly risk experiencing the tragedy of losing our son again?” he asked, his voice the smallest you’d ever heard it, “just to have me?”
You placed your hand on top of his. “What happened was out of our control. If the gods did not intend for him to be your heir, so be it. It cannot be a fault of our own. We did not bring it upon him, Aegon. We have no knowledge of what could happen given another heir, and this tragedy is not reason enough for me to give up on having children. I think it unfair of you to make such a drastic decision on my behalf. If you do not wish to be intimate with me because you yourself do not desire it, then so be it, but you do not get to make these decisions for me. I did not choose to be without your touch, Aegon, and it is unfair for you to choose it for me.”
It was the most you’d said at one time since your son died.
“I miss you,” you added.
A tear fell down Aegon’s cheek. “I never want to see you in pain again.”
“There is no guarantee you would. There is not even a guarantee I will fall pregnant again.”
Aegon knew you were right. He was making decisions for you, and he knew he had no right to, he was just so scared. He hated seeing what losing your first son did to you, and he thought he was doing right by you by not risking a pregnancy and then loss of another. He did not realize the damage he was doing.
He was lost in his thoughts, and you took his silence to mean that he was sticking to his word. “Please just let me rest, Aegon, I do not wish to rehash the same argument again.”
You fell back into your relaxed position, removing your hand from Aegon’s and resting both of your hands on either side of the metal tub.
Aegon only spoke a small whisper of your name again before moving his hand down your leg, sinking beneath the water. You maintained your position. He made it clear to you he did not want intimacy anymore, so why would he actually be doing something intimate?
You were caught by surprise when his hand reached between your legs and he ran a finger between your folds. You inhaled a sharp breath, your eyes remaining shut as the feeling was too good. Even if this stopped right now, you needed to make the most of the feeling while you had it.
Only, it didn’t stop. Aegon continued to feel you, circling his finger around your clit, causing your head to fall back even further as a soft whine left your lips. Aegon hadn’t heard the sweet sound of your whines and moans in ages, and one tiny noise from you made him completely forget why he ever vowed to keep himself away from you.
The water was sloshing slightly as Aegon moved his hand, inserting a finger into your hole as his thumb took residence on your clit, keeping the stimulation there as he began to push a finger in and out of you.
He watched you writhe in the water, your hips beginning to grind up into his hand. “A-Aegon,” you tried to catch his attention, but he was so consumed in you that he took it for a moan.
He leaned over you, his face mere inches from yours. “Say my name again.”
“A-Aegon, I was t-“
Aegon cut you off by kissing you, catching you off guard and making you squeal with surprise into the kiss. He began to move his hand faster and faster, the water nearly spilling out of the tub from the movement of his arm.
You moved to grab his wrist, and he pulled away from your mouth briefly to inspect your face and make sure you were alright.
“As much as I want you,” you breathed out, “I don’t want to do anything unless you do as well.”
Aegon didn’t verbally respond, as he often didn’t, but instead kissed you, hard. You held the back of his head, deepening the kiss as he added another finger into you, a moan escaping your throat into the kiss, only egging Aegon on more.
“Fuck,” you whimpered when Aegon pulled away.
He leaned down to kiss your neck, not caring at all about the water hitting the side of his face and drenching his hair.
You moaned and whined as his fingers fucked you at a violent pace, curling when they hit the sweet spot within you that had your breathing nearly stopping for moments at a time.
“Aegon, I’m-“
Aegon lifted his head so that he was looking directly at you. Your eyes squeezed shut as your climax hit you hard, Aegon removing his hand from you to grip either side of your face and kiss you as your orgasm washed over you, your juices mixing with the bath water.
Aegon softened the kiss as he felt your breathing calm down, only pulling away when your muscles released their tension beneath him.
“Thank you,” you sighed.
“Get out of this thing,” Aegon said, standing up and holding out both of his hands to you.
You placed your hands in his, allowing him to help pull you to a standing position. You shivered as the cool air hit your bare, wet skin. You stepped out of the bathtub, anchoring your balance on Aegon. When you stepped onto the ground, Aegon pulled your waist against him so quickly that you nearly fell over.
“If you’re all in, I’m all in,” he spoke.
You gave him a genuine smile. “I’m all in. Always have been.”
Aegon leaned down to kiss you again, backing your bodies up slightly so that you were standing directly next to the stool.
Aegon then became almost carnal, having been without you for so long that he was too impatient now to wait any longer.
Aegon pulled you away from him and spun your body around, pushing you down until you were bent over the stool he was sitting on mere moments ago.
He undid his breeches and pushed his clothing down, leaving his lower half exposed.
He held a hand out in front of your face. “Spit.”
You did as you were told, giving him the lubricant that he spread on the head of his cock as he lined himself up with your entrance. He began to push into you slowly for a moment, before slamming his entire length into you.
You cried out at the feeling. One of his hands gripped your waist while the other fisted into your hair, pulling your neck back as he fucked you from behind. He was snapping his hips from the first thrust on, the pressure causing your body, and subsequently the stool, to shift forward with each hit.
“F-fuck,“ you moaned, “I missed y-you, Y-our Grace.”
The title only made him more feral, his grip on your hips destined to bruise you as he slammed into you viciously. He growled and groaned behind you, subconsciously trying to make up for months of deprivation.
You came again, the feeling of your walls squeezing his cock like a vice pushing him over the edge, despite the sex not lasting long at all. His body was in desperate need of you.
He bottomed out inside of you as he came, spilling his seed within you as he calmed down for a moment before pulling out of you.
He released his grip on your hair, allowing you to push yourself up. You nearly lost your balance, but Aegon caught your waist with his arm.
“I missed you too,” Aegon spoke, “what a fucking idiot I am.”
“Yeah, but that’s not new,” you teased, giving him a sweet kiss to show your forgiveness.
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luna-azzurra · 3 months
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do you have any tips for writing arguments/fights?
Before you write an argument, know why each character is upset. Understanding their motivations will make the conflict feel authentic.
What are their personal stakes? What do they stand to lose or gain?
What are their emotional buttons? What specifically sets them off?
Keep Dialogue Realistic, Arguments often involve interrupted sentences, raised voices, and heightened emotions.
People often cut each other off in heated arguments. Use dashes or ellipses to show interruptions.
Use short, sharp sentences to convey anger or frustration.
Don’t be afraid to use exclamation points sparingly to show yelling or intense emotions.
Example:"I can't believe you did that!" she shouted. "I had no choice!" he interrupted, throwing up his hands. "You never listen to me!"
Show, Don’t Just Tell, Body language and physical actions can add a lot to an argument. Show how characters are feeling through their actions:
Clenched fists, crossed arms, pacing, or avoiding eye contact can show tension.
A character might slam a door, throw something, or storm out.
Flushed cheeks, narrowed eyes, or a furrowed brow can convey anger or frustration.
Build Tension Gradually, Arguments often escalate rather than start at full intensity. Build the tension step by step.
Start with a minor disagreement or a tense conversation.
Let the argument build as each character becomes more invested and emotional.
Reach a peak where the characters are at their most heated and emotional.
Decide whether the argument resolves or leaves characters estranged.
Use Emotional Beats, Incorporate moments of realization, regret, or empathy within the argument. These emotional beats can add depth:
A character might have a sudden realization in the middle of the argument.
Show a character feeling immediate regret after saying something hurtful.
A character might momentarily see the other’s point of view, even if they don’t fully agree.
Reflect the Stakes, Make sure the argument reflects the stakes of the story. The higher the stakes, the more intense the argument should be. If it’s a minor disagreement, keep it low-key. If it’s a life-changing issue, let the emotions and tension run high.
Vary the Pacing Not all arguments need to be fast and furious. Vary the pacing to reflect the ebb and flow of real conversations, Use quick back-and-forth dialogue for intense moments. Allow for pauses where characters collect their thoughts or calm down slightly before the next surge of emotion.
Consider the Aftermath, Think about the consequences of the argument. How does it affect the characters and their relationships moving forward?
Are characters feeling guilty, relieved, or still angry?
Does the argument bring characters closer, or does it drive a wedge between them?
Example of a Written Argument
"You never take my side!" Luana shouted, her voice echoing in the small apartment. "That's not true," Jamil replied, his tone defensive. "I just don't think you’re being reasonable." "Reasonable?" She laughed bitterly, crossing her arms. "You call ignoring my feelings reasonable?" "I'm not ignoring your feelings!" Jamil snapped, taking a step closer. "I just think you're overreacting." "Overreacting?" Luana's face flushed with anger. "You always say that! Every single time I bring up something important!" "Well, maybe if you didn't blow things out of proportion—" "Don't you dare say that!" she interrupted, her voice trembling. "I can't talk to you when you're like this." "Fine," he muttered, turning away. "Maybe we shouldn’t talk at all."
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gguk-n · 1 month
Text
Chapter 3- The Reveal
Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)
Series Masterlist
Summary- Y/N gets rejected for the sixth time. Max win's the Monaco grand prix 2023. Y/N decides she needs time for herself.
No hate to anyone, it's for the story
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{Reader's POV}
I fell asleep crying, a faint buzzing from my phone was heard from the other room. I woke up after a few hours at 3 am when I found my phone which was burning up. The messages hadn't stop coming. They had gotten quite frantic as I scrolled through my notifications. I decided to reply to Max's messages.
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He was still the guy I liked, I couldn't not reply. But I was hurt and in no shape to be talking to him. I don't know what Max said after my message because my phone shut down. I pushed myself to clean myself up and my surrounding. I was a stress cleaner and I'm so grateful to having 2 jobs right now. It meant my mind would be preoccupied. I cleaned my whole house before leaving for school in the morning. My eyes were red and puffy; I was on coffee. I had yet to switch my phone on. I wasn't ready to face Max yet.
Today was the worst day, not only because of last night's revelation but I had the least amount of classes today. None of the kids needed help after class either. That meant I was left to my own devices. When I switched the phone on, I could see missed calls and texts from Max and a couple voice messages; from the night before and today morning I guess. I opened up Google to check his schedule; he was in Monaco, which was also his home currently. I found out a lot about him, you think you know someone but then Google tells you otherwise. His dad was as shitty as he described. His records and feats were astonishing and if I wasn't this angry at him for hiding it from me, I would've been so proud and told him so. His Instagram feed was pretty and polished and he posted so much racing content. I found his streaming account with a team, he was exactly like the Max that called me everyday with occasional appearances from the cats on stream. People spoke so rudely about Max, it angered me to no end. He was a kind man, a liar but a sweet man.
The real kicker was Max's girlfriend's account where I found so many pictures of them together with her daughter, from what I found out. He looked happy, he had a family like he always said he wanted. I couldn't help but smile bitterly, a part of me wished that it was me who was the woman beside him with our kid. Life is cruel in some ways, mine is satire at best. Here, I can't date a man because I'm hung up on a guy I've never met before while said man has a family. I felt tears streaming down my face which I quickly wiped them off. I had enough of pity and sympathy stares since the morning to last a lifetime, I can't deal with any more of them.
I knew I wanted to talk to Max, the only guy who has ever understood me, however, I also knew that if we spoke I wouldn't be listening to him. I was scared I would lose the one true friend I have. Would Max understand where I was coming from? Why did he hide this from me? Did he not trust me enough? I get it, but you are a public figure. I don't know how to feel about all of this. It was the weekend tomorrow. I would be left with my thoughts and I probably shouldn't confront Max before his race on Sunday, right?
I spent the next two days planning how I would talk to Max. How I would ask him why he hid everything from me? I didn't want to fight him; my parents always said I was rude and difficult to work with, that my anger consumed me, that my words were harsh. I wasn't supposed to show such negative emotions they said. I didn't want to lose him; but was I allowed to hold on to him when he never let me have him?
Max called and texted me every day but I was very scared, scared of becoming the monster my parents said I was, sacred of hurting the one I love. There I said it, said Max and love in the same sentence. I had threaded that line so carefully but after all of this, I realised that I've loved him for years and watching him be happy with some else hurt as much as knowing that I never truly knew Max. It was Sunday night, I checked the news and saw that Max won. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to rejoice watching the man I love win at what he was best at or be hurt watching him live a life I knew nothing about.
I texted him at night on Sunday, maybe he would be busy celebrating his win, I didn't know. I didn't know a lot of things. As I waited for the text back, I logged on to my emails that I had forgotten about to find a reply from the publication I had sent my work to; to be met with dismay. Another rejection, I'm not sure how many more rejections I could take. My hands shook, making the laptop fall from my lap onto the bed. I got up and got myself a glass of water.
I laid on my bed for god knows how long before the familiar ring of my phone pulled me out of my trance. I had taken the day off tomorrow. I knew I didn't have the mental or emotional capacity to deal with anything. I answered the call to a worried Max.
Max- Schat, how have you been? Haven't heard a word from you in days. Y/N- I've been busy, school year ending and stuff. Why didn't you sleep yet? Max- You know my sleep schedule is non existent. Y/N- Yeah, I guess I do. Max looked at me confused. Y/N- You know how I do freelance editing Max- You've told me about it Y/N- The latest author I'm working with is a sports author. I was hoping you could help me since you are a walking encycylopedia. Max- sure schat, but what's up with you? You know I'm always there for you Y/N- Yeah it nothing, just stressed. Max- Take off, you deserve it Y/N- The summer break is here soon, I'll be fine. So about that author... Max-Yeah, what sport does she write for? Y/N- Formula One. I don't really like reading lengthy articles and I'm sure one article wouldn't do a sport any justice. I could see the colour leave Max's face. He licked his lips before speaking. Max- You did not go through google yet, right? Y/N- Oh no, what do you take me for? I got excited to learn about something new. Do you know who the reigning champion is? Max was quite, a sort of uncomfortable silence had enveloped us, for the first time in 10 years. Y/N- Some dude named Max Verstappen. You guys share the same first name. He has 2 cats too; named Jimmy and Sassy, who look exactly like your bengals. I mean he even looks like you, with horrible sleep schedule just like you. He even sounds like you. I felt my voice begin to crack while I spoke, the lump in my throat unbearably big, my breathing was uneven. Max- Schatje, I can explain. Y/N- You don't have to Max. I never asked you what you did. You don't have to explain anything. (I smiled with only my lips) Max- I wanted to tell you, it just never came up in conversation. Y/N- I get it, it's difficult to tell your friend who has amounted to nothing that you are the World Driver's Champion, best of the best in Formula One. Max- Y/N, it's nothing like that. You're great, you're kind, you're funny. I laughed bitterly. Y/N- Those are character traits I possess, they don't describe my career goals or achievements. I know I work 2 jobs to stay afloat while you make millions, I know I wish I was an author and not their editor, I know you probably thought I was too stupid to understand your rich and fancy world. Max- No, no, you're so talented. I've read your work and I'm sure the right publication will pick your work up. Y/N- I got rejected for the sixth time today. All of this is fine except that you lied to me about being single while having a girlfriend for years and having the happy family you dreamt off. You didn't have to introduce me to her; not like my boyfriends met you. But it would've been nice if I knew. Max- It just never came up. Y/N- I...we joked about setting you up with someone all the time. Please don't. I get it, we didn't tell each other about work goals or what we did as a job but personal life; I literally told you about every guy I've ever been with. I felt bad telling you thinking you were single. I feel stupid right now. I had tears streaming down my face at this point. Max- I'm sorry,Y/N. I promise I won't hide anything anymore. Please, don't cry. Y/N- My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I majored in literature in Uni and now work as a primary school teacher and freelance editor. I'm trying to get my book published soon. I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago. Max- Please don't do this. Y/N- I believe at least one of us should be honest. Max- Let me fix this. Y/N- Don't worry. There's nothing to fix. (I wiped away my tears) Max- Please don't say that. You mean a lot me. Y/N- Me too. That's why, I need time. I'll talk to you when I'm ready. Max- Please, I can't lose you. Y/N- You won't. I'll always be there for you. I just need time. Take care Max I saw tears streaming down Max's face. Max- Bye, take care Y/N. I'll always be here. And then the screen went black.
[Max spent the whole week worrying about Y/N. He couldn't think straight. This was weird, she was never this busy before. It was stressing him out, he couldn't eat or sleep. He never even thought about the fact that maybe his lie had been exposed. When Y/N texted him, he was at a club in Monaco with the other drivers to celebrate his win. He only saw it after he got back home and immediately called her. She looked different, there was this sadness in her eyes. The smile didn't reach her eyes. And then she started talking, his heart was beating very fast. The moment she said Formula One, his whole world came crashing down. The more she spoke the more he felt like he was falling deeper, in a pit of his own making. He wanted to tell her, he wanted to explain himself but no words left his mouth. Then she started talking about his girlfriend. He felt like this was the last time he would get to talk to her, the last time he would hear her voice. This felt like the last time he would have her]
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buccini555 · 11 months
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𝐓𝐨𝐤𝐲𝐨 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬: "𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮"
⁀➴ Them reacting to you saying "I hate you" after an argument
⌕ H e a d c a n o n s !
ᶻ 𝗓ᵎ 𝐹𝑡. Ran Haitani, Rindou Haitani, Sanzu Haruchiyo, Kakucho Hitto, Izana Kurokawa, Shinichiro Sano, Inui Seishu and Kokonoi Hajime
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𝐑𝐚𝐧 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢
Ran would be surprised and immediately remain completely silent, he would ignore you and look at you with a look of utter disappointment.
"So that's it? You hate me? Okay, just leave me." He would say in a serious tone, pretending not to be hurt in a certain way and would definitely shrug his shoulders, ignoring you after your spoke.
"Think better before you take out your stupid anger on me, understood?" Ran wouldn't listen to your apologies or any other speech coming from you, he would remain rude to you for a long period of time and would certainly become even more absent.
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𝐑𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢
Momentarily, Rindou just wouldn't take your sentence seriously, despite that, that doesn't mean that hearing those words didn't hurt him in some way.
"You have to control your fucking emotions before you say something you'll regret later." Immediately, Rindou would respond to your speech, looking away and shaking his head in denial, it was undeniable that Rindou was totally disappointed with such an attitude coming from you.
"... Leave me alone." He would ask politely before he lost control with you and worsened the current situation between the two of you.
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𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐳𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐲𝐨
Haruchiyo would ignore you talk, or at least try to ignore it, hearing you say that you sincerely hated him broke his heart, but he would never show any feelings about it.
"I'm not going to stand here and listen to you talk shit." Sanzu wouldn't hesitate to leave to avoid even more confusion, he honestly didn't intend to end up losing control with you.
"...You've already hurt me enough." It would be the last thing Haruchiyo would say to you before walking away, even if you apologized or wanted him to stay, Sanzu would ignore you, even if he didn't want to, he would leave you for a while.
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𝐊𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐨 𝐇𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐨
Kakucho always did his best to avoid fights and would never say rude things to you, when he heard you say that you hated him, the taller felt his world collapse at the same moment, despite everything, Kakucho hid how sensitive he was, but, at that moment, all he could do was cry.
"I-I'm sorry for making you hate me, I never wanted that..." As soon as he calmed down a little, he would say completely disappointed in having let things get to this state.
After this fact, Kakucho would remain hurt for a long time, no matter how much he understood you or accepted your apology, he would continue to feel that feeling of not feeling loved and being unable to make someone really love him.
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𝐈𝐳𝐚𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚
Izana would be deeply hurt and disbelieve your words, as soon as he heard you, he would laugh nervously, but as soon as he realized how serious your words were, the smile would give way to a serious expression.
"I hate myself too, do you think I would really be affected by your stupid hatred for me?" Izana would say, screaming, he wouldn't even be able to look at you, he would just remain brooding away inside because he thought that, in a way, he had caused such behavior in you.
"Since you hate me, go ahead! Leave! Leave me like everyone else did!" It would be Izana's final speech, he really wouldn't accept your apology.
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𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨 𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐨
Shinichiro would look at you with a look of disapproval and sadness, he wouldn't even be able to believe what he was hearing.
"... You hate me?" He would say, still in denial, the fight would end instantly, Shinichiro wouldn't even want to hear you anymore, he would really believe those words and that would hurt.
"I would never say something like that to you, never! Do you know the pain of hearing that? You'll never know that." After completing his speech, it would take you a while to see him again, Shinichiro would definitely leave you there, alone, because he was hurt and also to get away from all those fights.
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𝐈𝐧𝐮𝐢 𝐒𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐮
He would be completely disbelieved in your statement even though he knew that the fight was becoming unbearable, he really didn't expect that from you.
"Y-you hate me?" He would question, with teary eyes and a trembling and low voice, as soon as you finished speaking, Inupi would immediately look away and try to hide how much it affected him.
"I'm sorry for making you hate me, it won't happen again." Before you could say anything or apologize, Inui would say, walking away and going to be alone for a while, at that moment, he would believe your words, making him feel guilty for not being able to avoid all that fight.
After a while of trying to convince himself that you just said that in a moment of anger, Inui would try to forget the whole mess.
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𝐊𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞
Kokonoi would be silent as soon as you made your speech, hearing you say that you hate him would really hurt him, despite that, Koko wouldn't show how sad and disappointed he would feel, on the contrary, he would act as if nothing had happened.
"You hate me? Okay, I'll remember that." He would say in the calmest tone he could and give a wry smile.
"I'm sorry, but I can't say the same to you." Kokonoi would walk away from you and not say anything else after that, ignoring any apology or anything like that, deep down, he would honestly be holding himself back from crying.
Even if everything was fine, Koko would definitely hold a certain grudge against you, moreover, he would start to think that you really hate him, making him become a little cold and distant.
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magicwhiskers29 · 9 months
Text
What's really interesting to me about Prime Shadow is that he reads as actively trying to sympathise with Sonic in s3e1. A lot of people have talked about the constant saves all episode and yes, of course. There's also something to be said about this Shadow's sense of superiority not restricting him to believing he's just physically better (This one is actually willing to run, for one), but I really want to talk about his expressions, in this episode.
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He starts the episode angry. Pretty much of course -- this tends to be Prime Shadow's default. His resting face already looks pretty angry, although I'd say his expressions when he's giving Sonic his "I told you so" are angrier than usual. His motivation is still about saving what of his home can be saved, and Sonic has just messed that up again, in trusting Nine when Shadow specifically said not to.
I don't think Sonic was wrong exactly to trust someone who looks and can act so much like someone who would never betray him -- it's naïve, but understandable. But to Shadow, it's naïve and foolish. Last season already established that Shadow doesn't have anyone he's close to, so it's going to be hard for him to understand, especially when he could sense Nine's betrayal a mile away. So he angers, and talks harshly and sternly to Sonic.
But look:
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SHADOW: We need to leave this world.
SONIC: You don't have to tell me twice.
When Sonic actually listens to him and runs when he says to, he's surprised. He's used to Sonic having his own agenda and not listening, because that's Sonic's biggest flaw in Prime. Sonic quips that he doesn't need the reminder, but yes, yes he usually does, and will still do in this case.
Shadow understands Sonic for his flaws, for better or worse, so he's surprised when they don't act up. (Yet, anyway)
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So he initially attempts to offer compassion, when Sonic sees the Ghost Hill inprints of his friends. He doesn't immediately go back to stern yelling and angry expressions; he offers out a hand and tries to understand more. He's not seeing Sonic's flaws for liabilities against him -- he's attempting to work around them for both of them.
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He angers again when Sonic doesn't listen and continues to insist of saving the Ghost Hill imprints, but look at the way he talks:
SHADOW: No! They can't be saved. Think about your real friends, the ones who still have a chance. If you want to help them, we need to get out of here.
He doesn't sound that angry at first. A little desperate, maybe, but he doesn't sound angry until his last sentence. His frustration's building at Sonic not listening, and he's having to reason against his own motivation. Does Shadow want Sonic's friends back? Maybe! We don't know his relationship with any of them in Prime. But we do know Shadow wants to get home more than he wants to save them.
It seems then to irritate him to have to use this line of reasoning, but he's not necessarily angry at Sonic for having to use it -- remember, he expected something like this. And clearly does understand Sonic's flaws and motivations; it's just that this time, he's not seeing them for why Sonic would be a liability to him, or why he's better suited to save Green Hill than Sonic. This time, he uses his knowledge of them to work around Sonic and keep his help.
He could technically leave Sonic behind at this point. He doesn't know that Sonic himself has actual value until Nine implies what he's found out about Sonic's shard energy later in the episode. If he keeps Sonic with him, he only runs the risk of ending up in the same place as the end of last season, Sonic having made the same mistakes. At least, that's how he could look at it.
But he does clearly care for Sonic. We know their dynamic is odd to others, in Prime. What we hear about their fights at the start of s1 implies that they are frequent, and also that both parties enjoy them. For better or worse (again), Shadow seems to now be aware that Sonic is part of home for him, and he doesn't want to lose Sonic. (a similar attitude Sonic had towards him at the start if s2)
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When talking about Nine's betrayal, Shadow's anger is not directed at Sonic. The easiest way to see that is simply that he's not looking at Sonic whilst talking about it, but I think you can also see it in the way he talks about their revenge. When he says, "And he will pay for it.", he sounds like he's attempting to reassure Sonic.
It's worth noting, of course, that Shadow has never really understood Sonic and Nine's bond. He couldn't understand why Sonic trusted him, and he won't understand why Sonic wants to reason with him in the future, so he does think that assuring Sonic of their success in what he perceives as a big step towards their goal helps.
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We can also see him being not visibly annoyed at Sonic messing around, in both of these scenes. He's not hostile about Sonic's ribbing about saving him, or his silly teasing about the robot version looking like both of them. He's used to it. It seems he maybe even likes it, if not at least tolerates it. He likes, or at least tolerates, being around Sonic. It's just that his default for getting points across, or when faced with something he doesn't fully understand, or when provoked, is anger. He is not without his flaws too.
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He angers again when Sonic insists again on something he sees as futile -- reasoning with Nine. But as established, he doesn't understand quite why Sonic cares for Nine. He seems to make the same mistake Nine himself does in believing that Sonic only cares about him because of Tails, which is not true. He's biased towards Nine because of Tails, but we've seen him be excited about teaching Nine new things that Tails wouldn't need! He does like Nine for Nine, even if there is a flaw in there of him seeing Nine as an extension of Tails.
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And then the reveal scene of Sonic as the final shard. After Nine implies something else has prism energy, we first see Shadow stare slightly surprised at Sonic. I read this a quieter realisation. He knows the connection between the energy and Sonic instantly, and looks at Sonic in concern as he thinks.
Then he makes eye contact with Nine, who only confirms his suspicions with something of a taunting glare. This is when he realises why this is important, and that he is definitely right. And then, and only then, does he anger. Not at Sonic again, but back at Nine.
There's a sort of protectiveness to it, this time. There's no "Sonic, you didn't realise this before!?", only an urgency to get Sonic out of there. Not both of them, just Sonic. He wanted both of them out when he had a choice about it, but now he sees Sonic as something valuable to both him and Nine. He wants to save Sonic because Sonic is home, but as he understands it, Nine wants Sonic for power and to jeopardise what Shadow himself wants. And so now, he sacrifices himself.
He knows that Sonic will keep trying to save everyone, and for better or worse (again again), he's who they'll all need to rely on. Honestly, Shadow sacrificing himself is a pretty big display of trust, for him. He doesn't have many other options, but... We know he believes in Sonic's way of finding another way. Rather than losing time trying that for both of them, he trusts in Sonic to find it himself, like he always does.
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band--psycho · 1 year
Text
Harvey Specter x Reader- Stop Being So Stubborn
This story was requested by a lovely anon!!
Thank you so much for the request! (I'm also going to put this as a story for my A-Z Writing Challenge)
I hope you all enjoy this! 💛
Third Person POV
“Looks like Y/ns finally gone home,” Mike stated, sipping his coffee before looking over at the office across from Harvey’s.
Pretty much everyone at the office has been telling her to go home and rest; Harvey knew that even though he was one of the very few people who hadn’t said those words to her, partially because he didn’t want to get his head bitten off.
“I wouldn’t be so sure on that,” Harvey replied, not lifting his eyes from his paperwork once.
Y/n was as stubborn as he was, he knew her and he knew that just because she wasn’t in her office didn’t mean that she’d gone home. 
On late shifts such as these, the most common place to find Y/n was down in the library. 
So once Mike left, a few moments after their conversation, that’s where Harvey headed, but not before stopping off in the kitchen to make Y/n a much needed hot drink. 
“I thought I’d find you here,” he said as he entered the room.
A small sigh left Y/ns lips, “Congratulations on using your excellent detective skills,Mr Specter.”
The sarcasm in her voice was clear, as was the frustration at the interruption. 
“It wasn’t that hard, I could hear you sneezing from the hallway,” Harvey pointed out as he made his way closer to her:
“If you’re here to tell me to go home you’re wasting your breath,” she mumbled; her slightly bloodshot eyes fixed on the book infront of her.
Harvey was silent for a few moments as he sat down on the chair next to her and placed the drink he’d made her next to her, before saying, “You need to rest,”
He could tell she hadn’t been sleeping, not because of her snappy mood but because of the dark circles under her eyes. 
For a brief second her eyes left the page and glanced over at the hot drink now next to her. 
“I’ll rest when this case is over,” she mumbled, turning her attention back to the book she was reading. 
“If you don’t rest, you’ll make yourself worse and potentially lose the case,” Harvey was trying to be reasonable; make Y/n see that there was no way she could go into court and present the case, when she was like this, and win. 
He knew how hard she’d been working on this case and how much she wanted to impress everyone by winning it; the case meant a lot to her, he didn’t want her own stubbornness to be the reason she lost it. He didn’t want all her hard work to have been for nothing. 
“I’m fi-” 
Before Y/n even got the chance to finish that sentence she went into a coughing fit; which then made her eyes water. 
“You were saying?” Harvey said with raised eyebrows as he looked at Y/n and nudged the hot drink closer to her.
“Shut up,” Y/n mumbled, sipping on the hot drink he’d made her, hating that she’d inadvertently proved Harvey right, but also savouring the brief relief the hot drink provided her throat.
“Sweetheart-” Harvey began; his eyes soft as he looked at her, silently urging her to just stop being so damn stubborn.
“I need to finish this case,” the bluntness in her reply was an evident sign of her frustration; and the fact that Harvey only ever called her sweetheart when he was worried about her. 
“And you can,” he assured her as he placed his hand on top of hers lightly, it made a small wave of relief wash over Y/n, knowing that she didn’t have to fight him about this anymore; because she didn’t have the energy to do so. 
That was until a singular word made all of that relief vanish, “Tomorrow”
“Harvey-”
“If you don’t, I’ll tell Jessica to give the case to someone else,” Harvey interrupted, trying to ignore the guilt that gnawed at his heart when he saw the anger building in her y/e/c eyes.
It was a low blow; he knew that, but he was running out of options .
“You wouldn’t,”
“Do you really want to test that theory?”
“Blackmailing is illegal, you know,”
Of course he knew. 
But he also just didn’t really care about that. 
He cared about her. 
And making sure that she got the rest she so clearly needed.
“I’m aware, but if it means you can get some rest then I’m willing to do it,”
Y/n stared at him; as if trying to work out if he was serious about the threat he just made. 
“Fine,” she sighed in defeat as she closed the book she was reading. 
“Good,” Harvey concurred, “now drink your drink so we can get out of here,”
The shock was evident in Y/ns eyes at his words. 
“I can get home by myself,” she stated bluntly, putting her bay over her shoulder.
“It’s 10pm, in the middle of winter and you have a cold, like hell are you walking home, I’ll drop you there,” Harvey wasn’t asking; he was telling her that this was happening. 
He didn’t want her walking home, alone, not this late. 
“I need to go to the store-” 
“What’s this?” She asked cutting off her own sentence as Harvey handed her a small bag. 
“I asked Donna if she could get some medicine from the store,” Harvey explained. 
It wasn’t much, just some cold and flu relief, throat sweets, painkillers for the headaches he knew she got. 
He watched as the anger that had been burning in her eyes began to dwindle, “If I didn’t have a cold right now I would kiss you.”
The words came out of her mouth before she could stop them; but she didn’t regret them, not really. 
Her and Harvey had always been close and especially recently, their connection only seemed to grow. 
Harvey tried to stop a beaming smile from touching his lips but he couldn’t.
“How about we take a rain check for when you’re better, I’ll even take you out for dinner,if you want?” Harvet asked, and although he looked calm, his heart was racing so fast he was almost sure Y/n could hear it.
“Mr Specter, are you asking me out on a date?”
“Miss Y/l/n I believe you were the one who said you wanted to kiss me,” Harvey countered, “and yes, yes I am,”
He didn’t give her time to answer; they could discuss all of this tomorrow right now, it was getting later and Harvey was aware of that. 
“Now let’s get you home.”
Tagging:
@little-diable @rebelwrites @xacatalepsyx @wild-rose-35 @withmyteeth @yn-ymn-yln @munsinner @maximoff-xmen @vintagecarsandrecordplayers @book-dragon03 @bookworm1767 @fangirlfandomss @wretchedmo @mayans-mc @dana-is-snax @happilysparklyunknown @samanthaofanarchy @mrsamerica @navs-bhat @tinystudentmiracle @that-one-enthusiast @malfoys-demigod
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lucifertoxics · 6 months
Text
missing pieces: marcus lopez
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| pairing: marcus lopez x reader
| genre: exes to lovers
| warnings: angst, swearing, minors dni
| word count: 1.3k
| aura's note: this fic is for @chericherilvr who has an obsession with marcus like, so girly this is for you, enjoy🫶🏻
[ BACK TO MASTERLIST ]
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Ever since you and Marcus broke up, your only mechanism was singing. To say the least, you were actually good at it. That's when you found yourself with your schools band practicing a cover. Unfortunately for you, the rain started pouring soon after you finished, which forced you to stay under a bus stop.
Sadly, as you did not own a car, you had to call your brother, Billy. He said he'd pick you up, but that's when you saw Marcus car, probably a stolen one, pull up in front of the school.
The two of you dated for 3 years, until you decided to end it, without giving him any reason why. That was 5 months ago, until now, you haven't talked since. The only person that you didn't want to see right now, surely, the break up was a complicated one to say the least.
"Get in." He says. From the tone of his voice, you knew one thing, he was pissed.
"No fucking way!" You say in an annoyed voice, crossing your arms. You two are like magnets and you didn't want to be stuck in a small place with him. He was bad for you. He brings out the worst in you.
"Are you seriously going to stand out here?" He says with the same tone. Marcus knows that he is being irrational, but he can't help it. He's just mad and heartbroken right now, seeing you just makes it even worse. He hates you for breaking his heart, but he's not going to let you know that.
You roll your eyes, knowing that he has a point never the less. And you wanted to be home faster, so having an argument with him, wasn't useful. As you open the passanger door to get into the car, you look at him.
Marcus starts the car and pulls out of the bus stop, onto the road. He doesn't say anything, just drives. The windshield wipers make loud screeches as they fight to get the rain off the windshield. The heater blasts as it tries to warm up the car from the outside cold. The air makes the windshield foggy. Then suddenly, Marcus sights loudly and looks over at you. As you were looking outside the window, gathering your thoughts about what just happened.
Turning around to look at him, you decided to ask him. "What?" Looking at him with confused eyes.
Marcus just stays silent, he just stares at you, trying to gather his thoughts. You can see his anger and frustration written all over his face. He doesn't want to look at you, he doesn't wang to look at anything. He's just so angry. Finally, he breaks the silence with a blunt ask. "Why did you dump me?"
"Marcus..." You look at him and then out the window, sighting, trying to find a good way to answer his question. You hate this situation that you're in. This was not the right time to talk about the break up, not with him.
The classic answer, and the one that he didn't want to hear. He hated when things were "complicated". He hates uncertainty. He wanted an answer and he wanted it now. His grip on the steering wheel tightens as his anger builds up. "Jusf answer me, god fucking damn it!" He snaps a little at you. He doesn't like losing his cool, but he's already too far gone.
"Because i'm leaving for university..." You talk in a low tone, looking outside the window. "I got accepted into Harvard." You explain yourself to him, staring at him, hoping he understands your intentions.
Marcus felt an intense wave of jealousy wash over him as soon as you finish the sentence. He could never get into Harvard. He's not smart enough. He knows you are and that bothers him. He hates that he feels jealousy of you, but he can't help it. "So you dumped me because you got accepted into a stupid school?" He says completely ignoring the fact that you're going to Harvard.
"A stupid school? I got a full scholarship to that stupid school." You say in an annoyed tone whie looking at him, feeling that he doesn't care about your achievement. "You'll only be three hours away.." You say trying to find something positive in your departure.
"Oh three hours away, really?" Marcus says sarcastically trying to ignore the jealousy that's building up inside of him. "And i'm sure that this full scholarship is a huge achievement." He says mockingly. Marcus knows damn well the school isn't stupid and he knows how hard getting a full scholarship there is but it just pisses him off so he can't help but belittle your achievement.
"It is, Marcus! I didn't want to leave you...I didn't want to leave you in the first place. I was scared that this won't work, us, fuck i want this to work out cause i miss you." I explain myself to him on a calm tone, trying not to be affected by his words. Coming closer as you say the words "I miss you"
The words "I miss you" make him soften up, but only for a bit. He still doesn't know if he should forgive you or not, but hearing those words come out of your mouth makes his heart feel a little warmer. He slowly turns to look at you more. He reaches his hand over and places it on your thigh, giving you a gentle squeeze. Marcus likes to hide his emotions but that small act kind of gave him away.
"I missed you! You have no idea..." You lean your head on his shoulder as he drives. The truth is that you missed him. His kisses. His hugs. His affection, You were craving it.
Marcus blushes a bit as you put your head on his shoulder. He can barely believe he's allowing you to do these things. Maybe part of him is ready to forgive you...but another part of him is not. He stays silent as he continues driving, his hand firmly planted on your leg. He can't help his attraction towards you and his desire for you. The silence is getting more intense as the minutes go by.
"My brother said that long distance relationships don't always work out...so that's why i thought it's for the best...but it's only three hours..." You say sighting interlacing your fingers with his, still having your head on his shoulder.
Marcus wanted to argue and say that three hours is too much but he knows is his own jealousy getting the best of him. A small part of him, a very small part, has forgiven you for breaking his heart. He's not completely over it but he's slowly starting to terms with it. "You know, I could drive over and see your every weekend." He says finally, turning to look at you as he tries to gauge your reaction.
"Really? You would do that for me?" You look at him surprised, hy his answer. Jumping into his arms, hugging him tight, still surprised by what he said.
Marcus freezes up with surprise. He was honestly prepared for you to reject him, but now? This is...unexpected. He feels your tight embrace and a wave of butterflies washes over him. He wraps his arms around you, holding you even tighter. "You can't get rid of me that easily you know?" He says with a smile, brush a piece of hair out of your face.
"I don't wanna get rid of you." You smile, looking at him as he brushes the hair from your face. That's when you take his face in your hands, smashing your lips to his.
What was once a small wave of butterflies now turns into a tidal wave of euphoria. Marcus is swept away by the kiss, he wraps his arms arouns you and pulls you in closer. All the emotions and feelings that have built up during the car ride come bursting to the surface. He kisses you hard and agressively, like he wants to make this moment last forever.
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© LUCIFERTOXICS ⎯ do not translate, plagiarise or claim any of my works as your own.
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belovedmusings · 11 months
Text
“You have to trust me.”
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18+ Explicit Smut 🚫Minors DNI🚫
You and Satoru get into an argument before he heads off to face Sukuna. You worry for his safety since the incident of his sealing is still fresh in your mind, begging him to let the others help, but he insists he has to do it alone. Hot, emotional sex follows.
Relevant tags: AFAB reader w/minimal gendered language, reader with no defined characteristics for inclusivity and realism, angst, hurt/no comfort, before Ch 236, established relationship, unprotected sex, creampie, missionary/mating press, intentional baby making
Recommended songs to listen to while reading: Privilege (The Weeknd), lovely (Billie Eilish), Lo Vas Olvidar (Billie Eilish, ROSALIA)
A/N: I have a follow-up to this where he survives the fight so that you can have some comfort after this hurt. I’ll link it at the end :’) for now enjoy some angst.
Expand to read:
“Satoru, please,” your voice tapers off at the end, the ache in your heart stinging with its intensity. “Please, don’t do it alone. You can have help. Yuuta—”
“This isn’t his fight,” Satoru insists, “I don’t want to involve innocent kids in this if I can help it.”
“So you’re just gonna go off and get yourself killed instead?”
His brows furrow, eyes frozen on your face. His lips part in disbelief, and after a moment of being stunned, he laughs incredulously.
“Seriously?” He asks you, “Do you really think that lowly of me? You think I’m marching off to my death right now?! You think I’m some weak little twerp or something? That’s all I am to you?!”
As he raises his voice, you start to feel guilt rising up in your chest. You hadn’t meant to say it like that. Here he is, about to fight for the sake of the world and you’re belittling him and undermining his strength. You’re telling him you expect him to lose, even if that wasn’t your intention. You’re supposed to be his support pillar—he doesn’t just let anyone in.
The anger fizzles out of you like ice water on hot coals. Instantly, you feel cold.
“No, Satoru,” you shake your head, remorse bubbling up so violently tears spring to your eyes. This is the love of your life, the man who has been nothing but sweet, patient, and kind to you. Sure, back when things were normal, he used to tease and get on your nerves, he had to work a lot and his time was stretched thin as a result, but he always made time for you. He always thought of you, brought you your favorite treats from his missions, latched onto you when he came back because he missed you.
Apparently you started sobbing at some point while you thought about all of that, because the next thing you know, he’s wrapping his newly thickened arms around you and pulling you into his sturdy chest.
“I didn’t mean to yell at you,” his voice is subdued now, full of guilt. “I shouldn’t have raised my voice. It’s just that—”
“That’s not…” you sniffle, shaking your head as you try to find the strength to get a full sentence out in the midst of your break down. “I believe in you, Satoru, I do, I didn’t mean—didn’t mean to say that…”
He hugs you tighter, rubbing up and down your arm. You continue.
“I’m just so fucking scared, Satoru, I’m scared.”
More sobs wrack your body and he can only sigh heavily, trying to hold you as close to himself as he can.
“I don’t want to do this to you,” his voice is thin, like he’s trying hard to keep it even. “I hate that I can’t give you a normal, easy life with me.”
You huff, wrapping your arms around him. “That’s not…I wouldn’t trade what we have for the world, Satoru, for the world…”
“I just hate that this is causing you so much pain,” he replies. “I’m supposed to be taking it away, not making it worse. God, I really am the worst, aren’t I?”
You shake your head in disagreement, planting a kiss on his neck to protest his statement. His breath hitches, and the next moment, he’s raising your chin up with his index finger, ducking to connect your lips. You make a small noise in the back of your throat and kiss back, arms winding around his neck to draw him closer. You feel him hug your waist, and go willingly when he backs you up.
The backs of your legs meet the edge of his bed, the one that you’ve become so familiar with it’s more comfortable than your own at the place you rarely sleep anymore, and you realize that this might be the last chance you ever get to share it with him.
Another sob escapes you before you can stop it and you grab the collar of his shirt tightly, pulling him down with you. You fall onto the mattress, Satoru catching himself so he doesn’t crush you as he kisses you passionately.
You trail your palms down his chest, down his abdomen, over the tight black shirt he has on, then back up again just to feel him. Satoru is here right now, in your hands, on top of you—you need to cherish this while it lasts.
You break the kiss as your crying worsens, unable to stop lamenting the fact that you can’t freeze time in its place right now.
“Shh,” his sugary voice hushes you, “Shh, focus on me. I want this to feel good for you, okay? We can’t have you crying your way through it, silly, then you won’t remember a thing.”
You sniffle, trying to wipe at your eyes. “I don’t want to just r-remember you…I need you to be okay.”
“I am okay,” he says, pecking your brow bone sweetly. “I’m right here. Just feel me. Nothin’ else. Don’t even think right now, thinking’s not useful.”
You huff shakily, eyes fluttering shut as you feel his mouth go for your neck. He scrapes his teeth over your jugular to shock pleasure into your senses, successfully distracting some of the anguish right out of you.
“That’s it,” like this, his voice sounds almost like a purr, and you shiver, arms wrapping around his shoulders to grip at his back. He leaves a wet kiss where his teeth were and swipes his tongue over the spot, starting to suckle. You give him a soft noise in response, relishing in the fact that you know he’s leaving a mark on purpose. It’ll be there at least for a few days, or more if he really tries.
“Make it dark,” you breathe, “Give me as many as you can, please.”
“You don’t have to beg me,” he murmurs below your ear, sending heat pulsing downward. “I’ll give anything you want from me.”
You suck in a sharp breath. “Anything?”
At your eager question, he chuckles lowly, lifting himself up to meet your eyes. “Hmm. You have something specific in mind, don’t you?”
Your face heats up involuntarily, but the urgency of the situation has you forcing your bashfulness down. This might be the only time to ask. You had wanted to wait until the two of you were settled, maybe married if that’s what you agreed on, but now there might not be another moment. This could be it. And you know that if you don’t tell him what you want now and something happens, you’re going to regret it for the rest of your life.
With that thought, you take a deep breath and raise your hand to cup his face, brushing a few strands of his fringe away from his eyes.
“I want your baby, Satoru.”
You see the moment the words register in his brain. His eyes light up with something you’ve never seen before, and he smiles as if you just gave him the sweetest, most sincere compliment he’s ever heard.
“Yeah? A piece of me forever, huh?”
You nod, a grin tugging at your lips even as droplets continue to spill down your cheeks. “Yeah. Our love personified.”
He chuckles wetly and you think you see his eyes turn glossy, but he’s kissing you again before you can confirm it.
“It’s yours,” he says against your mouth. “All yours.”
You lose yourself in the long kiss that follows. All you can feel is him moving on top of you, tongue dancing with yours so intimately it would have the angels in the room blushing.
You raise your hips when he tugs at your pants, taking your underwear with them. He sits back on his haunches to slide them off your legs, eyes gentle as he gets between them and pushes his hands up underneath your shirt.
Sitting up quickly, you allow him to lift it off of you, discarding it behind himself. Now, you’re completely naked, but he’s still clothed.
“No fair,” you say, eyeing his shirt like it’s offensive, and he laughs.
“Say no more, say no more,” he replies, “Just lay down for me.”
Your stomach flutters with butterflies as you do as he tells you, looking up at him kneeling between your legs. You watch as he crosses his arms to peel his tight shirt off of his sculpted muscles, smooth, fair skin coming into view. He’d put a Greek god to shame, you think. He’s so tear-jerkingly beautiful it threatens madness in your mind.
“Like what you see?” He taunts mischievously, standing up to untie his pants and push those along with his boxers down his hips. His reddened erection springs free and you stare unabashedly at it, never having got used to the sight fully. He’s huge, both long and thick, all smooth skin except for a prominent vein on the underside. You used to joke with him early on in your relationship that it was the main reason for his cocky attitude, that you’d probably act the same way if you had a dick like that, and it always made him laugh. You love making him laugh. God, you love Satoru so much.
“Oh, you definitely like what you see now,” he snorts, climbing back onto the bed. “Gotta admit, it’s hot as hell to see you objectify me like that.”
“I wasn’t—”
“I’m nothing but a glorified sperm donor, mistress.”
You make an incredulous face. “What? I’m not—you don’t even—”
“Shh, I’m just teasin’,” he grins at you, leaning down to peck your lips. “I know you love me.”
You blow out a puff of air like a deflating balloon. “Satoru, I swear to god.”
He chuckles, shutting himself up by kissing you again. “That’s just how I show love.”
You chase his lips, hearing his words for the ‘I love you’ they truly are, threading your hands in his hair.
His big palms find your hips and he centers them for himself, lining up and grinding his stiff member against your wet core.
“Mmh,” you moan, moving with him, “Satoru…”
He sighs shakily, grabbing the crook of your knee to push it up, giving himself more room to move. His grinds become more forceful and it has you stuttering little gasps, nails digging into his back.
“Already scratchin’ me up?” He asks, and you can hear the smirk in his voice. “But I haven’t even put it in yet.”
The laugh you reply with is half-assed, need distracting you, and you find his eyes. “What’s stopping you?”
“Oh? Someone’s impatient,” he chuckles, stamping a kiss to your nose. “All right, all right. Better give you what you want.”
He takes ahold of himself and lines up, breathing a heavy sigh as he sinks into you. As soon as he does, you make a noise in the back of your throat, hugging him closer to you. As he bottoms out, you can’t help but press more chaste kisses wherever you can on him—his cheek, his jaw, his neck, his collarbone. You just love him. You love the feeling of his body on top of yours, the warm weight unique to him, how he fills your arms up, tangible and strong. You breathe in deeply, the sweet musk of his skin filling your senses. It’s your favorite scent in the entire world.
He pulls back and rocks forward again slowly, taking care to get you used to his size. So much has happened lately that you haven’t been able to get intimate a lot, so you have to let him ease you back into it.
As he works you open on his cock slowly, you take to caressing the smooth skin of his back, eyes closed to revel in the sound of his heavy breaths, strained with the effort to control his movements so as not to hurt you. You love how solid he is under your palms. You could touch him forever. If he survives this fight, you swear that you’ll never let go of him again. You plead mentally with any deity that may hear you to protect Satoru.
You kiss the soft underside of his chin and hold him closer, holding onto that thought. Protect him. Keep him safe. Keep him alive. I love this man so much, just please don’t take him away from me.
He chooses that moment to start picking up the pace, the dull ache it gives you enough to thankfully keep you from spiraling further. You sigh, bending your knees further to give him more room. Your legs then wrap around him, ankles crossing at the base of his spine, and he responds by going faster. The room begins to fill with the sound of your bodies meeting over and over, his length molding you to his shape with every push of his hips into yours.
On a particularly hard thrust, you gasp, tightening around him, and it causes him to groan right after you. His voice is so sweet. It was one of the things that stood out to you about him when you had first met him—the way he always seemed to have perfect control over it. He speaks with ebbs and flows to contour the meanings of his words, to give them his special nuance that perfectly colors in his personality. He’s just so animated when he speaks. If he’s annoyed, you’ll hear it. If he’s playful, you’ll hear it. If he’s happy, you’ll hear it.
Right now, as he works through stuttered breaths and hitched moans, delivered exhales of your name weaved into declarations of his bliss, you hear the pleasure you’re giving him. That control starts to slip and words start tumbling from his lips, voice thin and shaky, a tone reserved just for you.
You turn your head to lay a kiss on his lips, landing on the corner of his mouth, but he understands what you need, sweeping you into a languid, passionate make out session as he rocks in and out of you. You hear him make a sort of wet noise before he doubles down on his efforts, pushing deep inside of you and starting to roll his body.
“Satoru,” you hiss in surprise, mouth falling open as his abdomen grinds against the sensitive bud above the place he’s buried inside of, heightening the goosebumps that break out on your skin. Your head falls back and he takes the opportunity to start making as many marks on your skin as he can with his mouth. Like this, you feel yourself getting close, and that has you remembering what comes after this.
He’s going to leave, and he might not come back.
This might be the last time you ever get to have him.
“I love you,” you say, just needing to get the words out, needing him to know. “You’re so important to me—thank you for everything, Satoru.”
His breath catches in his throat and he finds your gaze, reaching up to cup your jaw in his palm.
“Thank you for everything,” He replies sincerely. “Thank you for loving me. For dealing with all my bullshit and sticking by me.”
“Always,” you shake your head, eyes filling with new tears. You sniffle, feeling that choked desperation start seizing your chest again. “Always, Satoru.”
He smiles at you but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Those beautiful luminescent oceans only reflect the deep sadness the both of you feel, and to see it glaringly obvious in his gaze breaks your heart. He can’t fake his happiness this time, not even for you. He’s human too, and being here with you like this in what might be the last time threatens to undo him.
Satoru swallows thickly and concentrates on his movements to distract himself, forcing himself to focus on the noises you make as he brings you closer and closer to the edge. He wants this to last forever just like you do, but you both know he’s needed by more people than just you.
Your climax approaches and with it, your emotions swell up inside of you. You remember meeting him for the first time, you remember when he started pursuing you, how happy he was when you agreed to a date, how hard he’d tried to win you over yet how effortless he made it look. Every time you two shared a laugh, every time he was there while you cried, how he always managed to put a smile back on your face. How sweet of a man he is to his students, how proud you can tell he is whenever he talks about them, and how his eyes light up whenever he eats a treat he’s fond of. God, you just love him.
“Satoru,” you whimper, orgasm hitting you abruptly. “Oh god, I love you so much.”
He exhales forcefully as he feels it, managing a few sloppy thrusts before he’s cumming as well pushing as deep as he can go in effort to fulfill your earlier request.
As you start to come down, the fear and despair come back tenfold, overtaking you in a fit of sobs. He wraps his arms around you and buries his nose in your hair.
“I’ll win,” He whispers to you, “I will. I’ll come back and we’ll raise the little shit we just made together, okay? They’ll probably grow up like me but I hope they’re more like you, baby.”
You hiccup loudly as you cry harder, clinging to the image of a happy family with him for dear life.
“It’s gonna be okay. You have to trust me,” He insists, inhaling slowly. “I have to go now.”
You hold him tighter, squeezing your eyes shut to commit this to memory before he’s pulling away, lifting himself off of you and grabbing his clothes quickly.
He dresses in silence, your cries the only thing echoing around the room. All you can manage to do is put on one of his button-ups from the foot of his bed, wiping furiously at your eyes.
Too soon, he’s clothed again, and it’s time for him to go.
He walks over to you again and takes your chin gently in his hand, tilting it up so that your eyes connect. He smiles softly at you.
“You know that I love you, right?”
A deep ache seats into your chest. He’s said it in a million ways before but never in its original form, those simple, crater-heavy three words. You nod, sniffling as another wave of lament threatens to pull you under.
“I do,” you confirm, forcing it out in a strained voice. He nods to himself, leaning in and pressing his soft lips to your forehead.
You feel the moment that he uses his technique to flash himself out of the room, because his warm presence that naturally takes up a lot of space vanishes and leaves absolutely everything feeling cold and sterile.
You break down again, head falling into your hands.
Shoko had told you where everyone would be watching the fight take place. You want to be there, and you will go, but you need to be alone first.
You just hope with all of your might that you won’t be left alone with only a piece of him to succeed his legacy. You want him to be there too. You need him to be there.
You need him to be okay.
—-
A/N: i gave myself an ouchie on the heart while writing this. whoops. also wow is he gorgeous in that picture at the top?? anyways here’s the second part where he survives bc i should be gege instead so he’ll be okay :-)
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jinx-xxed · 2 months
Text
Protected
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☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆ .。.:*
A/N; I love characters protecting their too-stubborn partners
Part of Written in the Stars
Summary; Kylo Ren does the worst thing imaginable in order to save you—he forces you off the battlefield.
Content; Angst to fluff, Supreme Leader Kylo, Commander Reader, original characters, bonded to Kylo through the Force, reader gets seriously injured, very protective Kylo, Kylo doesn’t want you to die, Kylo’s scared of losing you, and you’re scared of losing him, mention of Kylo dual wielding after he takes your lightsaber (he’s crazy), battlefield Kylo (my favorite), reader gets sentenced to the infirmary, talking about feelings, cuddling
Wc; 2.4k
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆ .。.:*
“You can’t do this!”
Your boots slip in the mud as you’re dragged backwards, you struggle against the hands that hold you. Rain pelts your body, drenches the entire battlefield, is illuminated in its fall to the ground by the ship headlights. Your infuriated gaze is stuck on the man before you; dressed in black, form eerily illuminated by the crackling red light of his saber and the blue undertones of the world around you. The silver around the visor in his mask seems to absorb the fluorescent lights of the ship, reflecting them back towards you. His steps sink into the skid marks you’ve left in the mud, walking in front of you in stride with your restrainers.
“Let me go!” You yell, thrashing as best you can, ignoring the screaming agony reverberating through your left side, hisses spat from between your teeth. You try with everything in you to free yourself from the members of your personal fleet that have a hold of you—Eera, Chief, and Rankou—your own comrades being used against you to keep you down. You’d expect your authority over them to work in your favor and for them to release you but considering the order came from Kylo, you’re sorely overruled.
“This is for your own good!” Chief says over the rain and thunderous noise of the battle happening just beyond the mountains that surround you all in this hidden alcove. She grunts as your elbow manages to fly back and hit her side, though her grip doesn’t budge.
“I can still fight! You can’t send me away like this!” You shout. Your captors pause briefly, allowing you to fall to your knees, mud and freezing cold water soaking into your clothes, chilling your war-heated body. Your chest heaves, puffs of your breath visible in the air. Every inhale hurts, every twitch of muscle aches and sends lightning bolts of pain across your limbs.
“I can, and I will.” Kylo says definitively, voice spat through the vocoder within his helmet. “You’re injured and in no state to be on a battlefield.”
“Bullshit, so are you!” You snarl, giving one last thrash of your arms, your strength already weakening. Your anger explodes, and you know he feels it along the bond you share. He can probably taste it in his mouth. It’s like he’s undermining you, underestimating your ability to fight right alongside him. But beyond that, you’re angry at him for making you leave him here alone. This fight is not easy, and it will continue to get harder, and he’s sending you away to deal with it on his own. Sure, he has the soldiers, but they’re just fodder in your eyes. He’s the one your enemies are after, he’s the one at the forefront, he’s the one who takes the brunt of it all. And you’re supposed to be there to be his shield. Sword and shield, that’s what you two are.
His own emotions along the bond come forward to combat yours, clashing in a similar fashion to the way lightsabers might. His are born from concern, for a need to protect you after he saw you be a direct victim of an explosion, after he had to drag your half-concious form off the field while your blood created a trail along the ground.
Your left side remains gaping still, red mixing with the rain and being washed away. It stings, it hurts like hell, but it still hurts less than being forced to leave him.
“Mine are minor. You will die if you stay out here.” He says. His injuries are a few mere scratches and wounds from blasters grazing his arms, nothing nearly as severe as your own. Your struggling has made it worse, torn it further at the edges, caused more blood to spill. He sees as such, and his disapproval is palpable. “You need to leave.”
You begin to get pulled again. The ramp to the ship is less than a foot away. “No! No, no, you can’t! Ren, you bastard!” You scream. You spit, you curse, you snarl—you act like a raging, rabid animal. In your flailing attempts at freedom, your lightsaber comes loose of its place on your belt, audibly falling into the mud. Theres a brief second where everything seems to freeze as your eyes land on it, and so do Kylo’s, his thought process easily following your own. You both go for it at the same time, both reaching out for it desperately with the Force, eager to be the first to grab it. Since it’s your own weapon, naturally it should have more affinity towards you and you feel that invisible grip on it, but in your weakened state, Kylo overpowers you with infuriating ease and it feels like he shoves you aside to take over. He yanks it from your grip as you yell, the metal handle flying into his outstretched hand and well away from you.
“No! Give that back!” You demand. It’s your own damn lightsaber, he has no right-
He clips it onto his belt, safely out of your reach. “I’ll give it back once this is done.” He then closes the distance between you at last, his gloved hand coming up to cup your cheek, thumb wiping away a raindrop that falls from your eyelashes. He leans forward, presses the cold muzzle of his helmet against your forehead as if to kiss you. His voice is low when he says, “I’ll find you again. I promise.”
You feel a pull against your mind, a tug in the direction you were already heading. It’s supposed to be simple like falling asleep but it feels more like getting the floor ripped out from under you. Kylo uses his ability to lull you into unconsciousness, taking advantage of your waning strength and sucking away more of it to make you less of a difficulty for the rest of them. Darkness swims at the edges of your vision, your body goes slack and your head lolls.
He straightens, looking to the Fleet members who hold you. “Get her on that ship and get her out of here.” His order is final, and then you can just barely see him as he walks away, his black-robed form swimming and blending in with the world around him.
“N-no, no…” Emotion cracks your voice, tears mix with the rain until they’re indistinguishable. You don’t know if the tears are from your own fear or your anger or both. You feel your comrades pull you onto the ship like it’s secondary, like it’s happening to someone who isn’t you. You feel the ramp close and the engines come to life. You feel a final despair as you’re taken into the warm embrace of the darkness.
» ☆ «
The door to your infirmary room opens. It’s followed by the familiar thudding of boots, the swish of a cape, until it all stops and Kylo stands next to your bed. Your back is turned to him, body curled up as best it can be without irritating the wounds wrapped in generous gauze. Your shoulders hunch as you feel him staring, you curl up just a bit tighter. Your stubborn attitude keeps you from facing him, so you ignore him in a futile attempt at pretending he’s not there. It’s an impossible task when his presence is so obvious and imposing, especially when you’re bonded to him.
“Love,” he says after a moment; his helmet is off, his voice clear. He waits another moment, silence stretching between you both. “Look at me.”
As much as you want to keep being stubborn, you can’t ignore the relief you feel at having him there, knowing he’s okay after not seeing him for four days—even if you were unconscious for half of that. You roll over, meeting his gaze at last. His face visibly softens when he can look at you and he sets his helmet that had been tucked under his arm aside. He settles himself on the edge of the bed next to you, making a significant dip that has you sliding closer to him. Kylo reaches forward to brush the backs of his gloved fingers against your cheek, then holding his hand there and leaning to kiss you. It’s gentle and easy against your lips, more of a greeting than anything. He pulls away and his eyes fall towards the bandages covering the entirety of your left side, visible beneath the tank top you wear. A healthy amount of bacta is smeared along the gauze, already fully healing a majority of your injuries.
His attention doesn’t lift from them as he says, “the battle was won.”
“I expected no less.” You reply with nothing but honesty. Your victories are almost always assured, your enemies being no match for the First Order. Though of course, some are harder to win than others.
There’s another silence between you as he idly runs his thumb along the back of your hand. He’s considering his next words, thinking of what to say. You get the general sense of his concentration along your connection, mixed with the colors of muddy blue and purple and gray—colors of uncertainty. “I’m sorry for what I did.” He says finally. An apology was not what you were expecting to hear from him, but it’s welcome nonetheless. Apologies from him are always rare, and it’s clear this one still took him a good amount of effort.
Your chin dips in the slightest hint of a nod, a sigh blowing through your nose. “We’re supposed to be partners. We fight together.” You say. “I could’ve done more.”
His free hand clenches into a fist. “I did what I had to to save you. I was not going to let you die trying to protect me.” He says roughly. “When I saw that explosion hit you I… you have no idea what that did to me. You were barely conscious, I thought that you…” He cuts himself off, his jaw clenching at the memory. You have a faint recollection of the emotion you’d felt from him in that moment, so fierce and clear along the bond that you could still feel it even in your state. He was beyond furious, ready to kill each and every last person who harmed you, to unleash infinite hells upon the enemy forces. But above all, he was scared. He was terrified that he was going to lose you as he watched your blood seep out in a steady stream, mixing with the mud beneath you.
You take his hand into your own, drawing him out of the dark cloud he stuck himself into. “I know. I know you were just protecting me. It’s just hard to accept that when your entire life has been dedicated to being a war commander. You never want to get taken off the field.” His hand is warm, blissfully so against your cold ones. The leather of his gloves is familiar. “Thank you.”
You can tell he’s not sure how to take being thanked, he never has been, so he changes the subject. “How are your injuries?”
“They’re better, almost fully healed. It’s just some of the major ones that need more time, perhaps another day, the medics said. Not sure what the scarring situation may look like.” You say, pondering the idea. You received severe burns and cuts from shrapnel, but the bacta is quick to reverse damage, so who knows if you’ll sustain any reminders of the wounds at all. “What about yours?”
He shakes his head. “They were nothing to be concerned about. A brief touch of bacta on the worst of them and I’m fine.”
“That’s good to hear.” You say with a brief smile. It seems neither of you can ever come out of a battle uninjured.
He reaches over to his belt, unclipping a familiar item and depositing it into your hands. “Here, as promised.” You stare at your lightsaber handle, feeling that sturdy weight and all the different notches and engravings. It feels like an old friend, a companion through thick and thin. However, embedded into that metal is something else, a recent memory that doesn’t belong to you. A brief scene flashes through your mind, of hands that aren’t yours gripping the saber, both ends ablaze with red fury, twisting and thrashing it.
You look up at Kylo, astonishment clear on your face. “You used my lightsaber? I can’t believe you.” You say teasingly, raising a brow. He avoids your gaze, seemingly embarrassed to admit anything. You chuckle. “So, how was it?”
“It was… fine.” He bites the words out before he composes himself. “I can see why it requires such skill to handle one like yours. Your abilities are impressive.”
You smile again. “Thanks. I’m glad you didn’t hurt yourself with it.” He rolls his eyes at that and you laugh as you set your lightsaber safely aside.
When you do, your eyes catch on the clock positioned on the wall that reads how late it is. The crew of the Steadfast is probably preparing to power down for the night and those taking the night patrols are getting ready for their shifts. You tap your fingers in thought, debating what you want to ask instead of just saying it like a wimp.
“I’ll stay here with you.” Kylo says, before you can manage to get it out. He saw the question formulating in your mind, felt the desire for him to keep close. He doesn’t want to leave you either.
“Are you sure? It’s a tight fit.” You point out. “I understand if you’d rather sleep in your own bed.” The infirmary beds are always small, sometimes even smaller than standard dorm beds, though this one is a just a tad bigger than usual because you’re the one sleeping in it. Sometimes your status can be useful.
“Of course.” He responds, like it’s the easiest decision in the world.
You scoot over to make as much room as you can for his hulking form. Kylo gets in behind you after kicking his boots off, about an inch away from falling off the bed, and pulls you close. He’s so very careful of your injuries, his arms snug around your body, his face buried in the crook of your neck. His steady breathing tickles your skin and his warmth bleeds into you, chasing away the chill of the infirmary as the lights dim to darkness.
The bond between you becomes relaxed, producing a mixture of warm colors and happy feelings that’s cultivated easily by the two of you in your state of peace as sleep is quick to claim you both.
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sidekick-hero · 9 months
Text
tangled with what I never said
(steddie | mature | 994 words | @steddiemas angsty sentence starters and @steddieholidaydrabbles modern au prompts)
NOW WITH A PART 2
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"I don't know what you want from me!" Eddie yells, his face contorted in misery.
He doesn't want to fight. He doesn't want to feel the way he does, confused and angry and miserable. He doesn't want to lose Steve.
"I want to know what's wrong. You can talk to me, man. You know you can, right?" Steve's voice wavers at the question, his hazel eyes imploring Eddie to tell him what's wrong so Steve can fix it.
The problem is, Steve can't fix it. Not this one.
Eddie lets out a deep sigh, feeling all his anger drain out of his body, leaving behind a weariness that feels too big for his body. He's just so tired of feeling like this.
"I don't know what to say, Steve. I told you, I'm just tired, okay? Go back to Sam and enjoy your date. I'm fine."
Steve doesn't move, just looks at him with that hurt look on his face and Eddie doesn't know why, but it reignites that seemingly ever-present flame of hot anger in his stomach.
"Stop. Stop looking at me like that." He snaps and sees Steve jump at the sharpness in his voice. They've been roommates for two years now, and friends for almost as long, and Eddie can count the times they've fought on one hand.
"Like what?"
"Like I killed your puppy or something. Like I hurt you when you're the one -" Eddie snaps his mouth shut, but it's too late. Fuck his traitorous mouth that keeps running off and ruining his life.
Steve takes a step forward, then another, inching closer like he's approaching a wild, cornered animal. "When I'm the one hurting you? Is that what's going on, Eddie, have I hurt you?" His hand reaches for Eddie and Eddie wants to take it so badly. That's the problem, isn't it? He wants and wants and wants.
He wants to be happy for Steve, he really does. He wants to smile and congratulate him for finally finding someone he likes enough to take out on dates and kiss good night and hold his hand with that happy smile on his face. Someone to hold him and fuck him so good that Eddie can hear it through the wall separating their bedrooms.
But most of all, Eddie wants to be that person for Steve.
"Eddie?" Steve's voice jolts him from his thoughts as a warm hand settles on his upper arm. "What did I do? Please, tell me."
"You didn't do anything..."
"Bullshit!" Steve shouts, and Eddie swears he can hear that one word echoing through his mind. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
"Steve," he tries, but is cut off by Steve's shaking voice, a stark contrast to the tight grip on his arm.
"No, Eddie. You can't... I can't do this anymore, watching you pull away. It's like. I don't know. Like you're disappearing before my eyes. And I... fuck." He runs a frustrated hand through his hair, messing it up even more than it already was after the heavy make-out session Eddie had come home to earlier than planned. His eyes find Eddie's and Eddie's stomach drops when he sees the tears glistening in them. "I miss you, okay? I fucking miss you."
"I'm right here," Eddie whispers. There are so many things he wants to say, needs to say, but they're all stuck in his throat, slowly choking him.
Steve moves even closer so that their faces are only inches apart, his eyes never leaving Eddie's, and whispers back, "No, you're not. Not really. You're like a ghost story." Eddie can feel Steve's breath against his own lips and thinks Steve must be trembling before he realizes that no, that's him.
"Steve, please." He doesn't know what he's pleading for. Maybe to take back those stupid words he said to Steve fourteen months ago.
It was a mistake.
We were drunk and high and I didn't mean it.
We can still be friends.
Maybe he's begging Steve to take the thoughts out of his head so he doesn't have to say them.
I'm sorry.
I was scared because I didn't want to lose you.
I'm so in love with you that some days it feels like it's killing me and I want to let it.
Steve's big, warm hand cradles his face and Eddie leans into it like a flower starving for the nurturing touch of the sun. They are so close that Eddie can feel Steve's body shaking as well, and Eddie doesn't know what it means, but he wants to take Steve and hold him until it stops. Until they can both be put back together again.
"Eddie, I -"
A knock interrupts what Steve is about to say. "Babe, is everything okay?"
Eddie feels his heart crumple in his chest at the sound of Steve's boyfriend's voice.
"Yeah, just give me a second." Steve calls over his shoulder, but when he turns around, Eddie steps away from him.
"Go to your boyfriend, Steve." Eddie tells him before grabbing his jacket and walking out of his bedroom and towards the door. He doesn't know where he's going, just that he hopes they're both gone when he gets back.
He walks aimlessly through the night, replaying their fight over and over again. The way he reacted when he saw Steve and Sam making out on the couch, how Steve followed him, confronted him. Steve telling him he missed him with tears in his eyes and holding his face so gently afterwards.
Maybe it's his Hail Mary, but he has to tell Steve how he feels, if only to make him understand that it's not Steve who's the problem, but Eddie.
Letting himself into their apartment, he finds it dark and quiet as he tiptoes to his room, and he's glad for the delay.
What he isn't prepared for is the sight of Steve lying on Eddie's bed, fast asleep, clutching Eddie's favorite hoodie to his chest.
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thatfreshi · 1 year
Text
It's Over (Astarion x Reader)
Hella angst. Will most likely write a part two because I can't see them sad for too long :(
Tw - gore, couple arguing, panic attack
Recommended Song: hoax - Taylor Swift
It's time. Astarion rips Cazador's body from the coffin, bloodlust in his eyes. You've had your doubts about the rite, about Astarion ascending, but he seemed insistent. He whispered sweet things about how he only wanted to keep both of you safe, and it made your skin crawl. Your precious lover, the pale vampire you came to love, he wanted that horrific power for himself, but at what cost?
"Astarion, stop."
His eyes meet yours.
"What my dear? Want to drink me in before I become the ascendant?"
"You don't know what you're doing."
He scoffs.
"Sure I do. Sacrifice the spawn, get rid of Cazador, leave the past behind! We can leave it all behind."
"You'll become just like him, you can be better than this."
"As if I could ever be the monster he is."
Astarion goes to start the ritual, to become something he was never meant to be. Something in you simply snaps, and you grab for your knife.
"What do you need that for?"
Your breathing gets heavy. Thoughts of your adventures, how long it took you to get here, how badly he wanted this, to finally feel safe. He can't help but stare at your shaking figure, wondering what the sudden stress is all about. You say nothing, instead taking a few steps towards the center of the room, by the vampire lord's defenseless body.
"Tav, what are you-"
And suddenly you're on your knees, plunging your knife into Cazador's chest, letting the blood spurt out of his skin, flying into your eyes.
"TAV!"
Astarion scrambles to fight the knife out of your hands, ignoring your tears. His master is already gone though, long gone, his lifeless corpse bleeding out all over the floor. He's frantic, your limbs crashing against each other.
"What have you done?!"
His cries turn into a shout, somewhere warbled between fear and anger.
"He was mine Tav, you knew he was mine!"
Checking for any sign that the vampire is still alive, he has trouble catching his breath. He quickly comes to his feet, realizing it's a fruitless endeavor. The vampire spawn mumbles to himself.
"It can still work, it has to work."
You get up to follow him, trying to get him to turn and face you.
"My lo-"
"Don't! You said you'd help me, you said you'd help me do this!"
Tears start to form in his eyes as the crushing anxiety turns his breathing into a choked wheeze, the beginning of a panic attack ensuing.
"I- I can't- you said."
"Aster, Aster listen to me, please."
You desperately try to hold onto him as he breaks from your grasp, becoming more scattered. He tries to form another sentence, filled with rage and sorrow.
"You... you lied to me! I-"
His body starts to crumble into yours, unsure of where else to go.
"I know. I'm sorry my love. I'm sorry."
The two of you come to the ground, him lying in your arms.
"I'm so sorry Astarion. I did what I had to, I couldn't see you become that monster. I just couldn't lose you like that."
He tries to choke out words in his mumbling breath.
"Hush, you're not breathing. I need you to breathe."
The rest of your companions watch on, knowing this was the plan if you couldn't get Astarion to give up the rite. Most of them can barely watch as he falls apart. You try to rub up and down his back, setting some kind of pace for his breath, but he just keeps trying to talk.
"How could you do this to me..."
It stings, making you wonder if you were wrong, if he'll hate you after this. He probably hates you right now.
"I know, I'm sorry."
He wasn't wrong. After wishing to complete the ascension for so long, ever since Raphael told him of the rite, it felt terrible to take it from him like this. But you knew better, that deep down you were saving him. You just didn't yet know at what cost. He continues to sit in your embrace, and you keep whispering sweet words. At some point his breathing starts to even out, but he just sobs more and more. You can hear Shadowheart and Gale murmuring behind you, somewhere that feels so far from this moment.
"Why?"
His question distracts you from the conversation off in the distance. You don't even know what to say. What in this moment could possibly convince him that this is for the best? He's just scared. He's always been scared, but he doesn't have to become the fear.
"You would've lost yourself. We all would've lost you Aster. I would've lost you."
He almost tries to argue with you, but loses his voice in the misery. It's over. He can't complete it now. You've made his decision for him.
When it comes time to go, he doesn't walk alongside you. The group makes their way back to the inn, and he simply silently walks amongst your companions, as he often did before you ever fell in love. Shadowheart makes her way to the back of the group.
"You did what you had to do. He'll see that eventually."
You liked her words, now you just had to believe them.
Despite the obvious tension, you end up in your room together, and for the first time in a long time he doesn't yearn for your touch. He lays on the bed as far as he can from you, leaving the blankets and sheets up to your discretion. There's not a thought behind his eyes, just shock, and that nagging fear that won't go away.
"I love you."
Astarion doesn't say it back, instead finding that it's too hard to try and sleep in the same room as you. He quickly gets up and storms out of the room, slamming the door. Your tears fall into the sheets he left you with. He ends up knocking on Gale's door, not sure where else to go. Usually he'd make fun of the wizard for various reasons, but he just averts his gaze, until he lets him in.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Gale asks, clearly very tired from today's events.
"No. I just want to be angry."
The man of the weave sighs.
"We all would've done the same. Tav was just the one to execute it."
"There's a very big difference in saying you'd do something, and actually doing it."
Gale lets the conversation go, allowing a space for Astarion to sleep on the bed, grabbing a spare blanket from the chair in the corner.
"They really love you. I know it may not seem like it right now, but Tav loves you more than I've ever seen anything be loved."
"Did I come here to be lectured?"
"Ugh, no. But you can't stay mad at them forever Astarion."
"I'll be the judge of that."
The next morning join your companions downstairs for a sloppily prepared breakfast. Wyll and Lae'zel look prepared to take on the day, talking about Githyanki fighting techniques. Shadowheart and Halsin look over your stock of herbs and potions, and Karlach helps Gale serve up food. Astarion is nowhere to be found. The wizard must've seen the worry in your eyes.
"He's in my room."
You let out a silent 'oh,' and take a serving of breakfast. After a couple minutes of moving the mixture around, you can't seem to force yourself to eat.
"Just go check on him, you're not fooling anyone."
Shadowheart gives you a sad smile. You pass her your food and go back upstairs, finding Gale's room. A soft knock against the door, the sound of the bed creaking inside.
"Aster, my love?"
No response. Against your better judgement, you open the door slowly.
"I don't really feel like talking Tav."
He's reading some tome Gale had lying around, trying to distract himself.
"I know. I just wanted you to know, I really am sorry."
Astarion sighs, setting the book down on the mattress.
"Alright, so we are talking then! Great, whatever you want."
"Don't be like that."
"Be like what? Be mad that you made a very important choice for me, against my will?"
You close the door behind you, knowing it's probably going to get ugly.
"Don't shut me out and pretend like we don't need to have this conversation, is what I meant."
"Fine. We'll have this conversation then."
He checks his nails, trying his best not to look you in the eye.
"I told you what I wanted, I told you what was important to me, and you lied. You lied and said you'd help me get what I want, what I wanted for both of us."
"I didn't think there would be any convincing you until you saw it all again."
"What? All of my mistakes? All the poor innocent people I lured to Cazador? No, not even Sebastian could stop me from finally having the power I deserved. But you? You thought that was your place?"
You squeeze your fist, trying to think of a way to reason with him.
"Even Cazador was like you once. And you saw what he became."
"You're implying I would enslave people and cut them up for fun? After all I've been through?"
"No! I'm just saying it changes people, that kind of power consumes you."
"And who are you to choose that for me? After I've had a million choices made for me, you thought that's what I'd want?"
He stands now, walking over to finally face you.
"I trusted you, and you lied."
Tears fill his eyes again.
"I wanted this for both of us, so we could both be safe forever, and you took that from me!"
"Do you think that's what I would've wanted? To be your little pet? Sit in some grand palace while you have all the power you could ever want?"
"I'd never treat you like that, and you know that Tav."
"Yes, but a vampire lord would, and that's what you'd be. You're not some special case Astarion! You don't become a true vampire, especially from a rite like that, and still be a good person."
"I never wanted to be a good person Tav. I just wanted to be free."
You try to grab onto his hand. At first he avoids your touch.
"You are free. We're free, we can do whatever we want! I gave us that!"
He almost wraps his hand in yours, but pulls back.
"I don't know that though. I'll never truly know that. Cazador may be dead, but now all those spawns are in the Underdark. They could try to come for me, or there could be some Gur on the prowl."
"And we'll all keep you safe. I'll keep you safe my love, I swear it."
For the first time since you've entered, he stares straight at you the whole time he speaks.
"I don't know if that's enough to keep me from hating you right now."
His words stab holes in your heart.
"You don't mean that."
"Don't you tell me what I fucking mean. No one gets to control me anymore. Not you, not Cazador, no one."
"I don't want to control you!"
"What do you call taking my choice away then? You're no better than him."
You almost gasp, breath caught in your throat, stunned by the fact that he would dare compare you to that man.
"Fine. You think I'm just like him? You think I want to control you? I'll make it real easy then. It's over, you can do whatever you want and you don't have to ever take me into consideration again!"
He tries to throw more venom at you, but you leave and slam the door before he can get the words out. You don't even stop by your room to grab anything, instead you storm out of the inn, walking past all your companions without a word. Shadowheart tries to call after you, but to no avail. You're lost in the crowds almost immediately, not even sure where you're going. Just away from him. Away from the only thing you've truly loved.
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ashprompts · 5 months
Text
𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒
a collection of sentence starters from dropout tv's game changer. feel free to alter pronouns/text as you see fit
“I’ve been here THE WHOLE TIME”
“It’s hard to hold this much anger in my body.” 
“If you never hear from me again, you know what to do!.”
“If they don’t find me it’s because I was chopped up and fed to the pigs!”
“I SOLVED YOUR LABYRINTH, PUZZLEMASTER. THE MINOTAUR’S ESCAPED, AND YOU’RE GONNA GET THE HORNS, BUDDY”
“I. CANNOT. WIN!!!!”
“A lot of people have been saying that ___ is a singularly evil, wildly incompetent, befuddled nepo baby silver spoon motherfucker. This is what people are saying.” 
“If you can do ONE swing on the swing I will let you play with all the math puzzles that you want” 
“You’re not getting a FUCKING JOKE OUT OF ME until you let me out of this room! You want bits?! You let me out of this room for bits, motherfucker!”
“Are we gonna die before we get outta here?” 
“I’m gonna lose so fucking hard it’s gonna blow your fucking mind”
“But in this sick rodeo, this bizarre fucked up clown festival, we’re here celebrating what I can only describe as the sickness at the core of America.” 
“Give me the assignment and I don’t miss. I’m gonna DIE before this is over.”
“Your tower’s gonna fall. Laugh it up now.” 
“A river of sweat is running down my back right now.”
“I do hate zombies and I will have nightmares about this tonight. But in this moment I just feel like I’m surrounded by friends.” 
“We don’t give a cum.”
“If you’re in a hole, DYING. I WON’T BE THERE.”
“I showed them my feet, [name]! I SHOWED THEM MY FEET FOR NOTHING?”
“Stop shaking your cock in the middle of a fucking huddle, dude!”
“I’d fuck that pie.”
“If you’re like me, you eat a lot of ass.”
“I hate capitalism but I also hate losing.”
“I get my tongue so far up somebody it’s like I’m tasting their tonsils. I get so deep in there I’m gonna burn myself with stomach acid.”
“I like perching like a little bisexual gargoyle”
“If you were performing on a subway I would take money away from you.”
“I’VE ONLY JUST BEGUN TO PULL THE THREAD ON THIS SWEATER.”
“Icarus flying too close to the sun, but it seems Daedalus our little mastercrafter over here had some WAX WINGS OF HIS OWN, didn’t he? Wanted to see his son fall, faaaalll from the sky, OH HOW CLOSE TO THE SUN HE FLEW”
“Hey can I get an ah? … Don’t scream at me.” 
“You kinda have the vibe that your kids call you by your first name.”
“The day I DON’T curse when a body falls from the sky, call somebody.”
“Could I place an order? I’m hungie. What do you think would be the best pizza to order if I’m quite hungie? Um, I like cheese, what is your largest pizza? Yeah let’s get an extra large because I’m hungie. I’m hungie, I’m hungie, I’m hungie.” 
“WE ARE NOT ANIMALS!!!”
“So long as I am on this stage and drawing breath, you can good and goddamn believe I’ll be trying my best in every challenge.”
“Was it bad that we just started smashing shit?” 
“You didn't count on INGENUITY did you motherfucker?!”
“FIGHT THE BOURGEOISIE. I WILL VENMO YOU $20.” 
“This could be hell. This is very Satre-esque.”
“YOU ARE NOT GOD. THE MACHINE IS GOD.”
“Can you tell us why you’d do this to us?”
“I won’t be made a fool”
“I do feel like I’m in a nightmare”
“I’m the only one OUT of the loop it seems”
“Everybody do the wenis! The wenis is a dance! Everybody is a genius! Who knows it in advance!” 
"DANCE IS A SIN!"
"You think I'm gonna fucking roll over?!"
"It'll be a COLD DAY IN HELL when I go out like a fucking chump!"
"I don't care about winning, I just don't wanna lose"
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gtgbabie0 · 6 months
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-William Bonney x reader
{Billy can’t handle you being in pain, even if you were defending him}
Enjoy my lovelies💕
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Silence is the only thing you’re met with when Billy walks into your quaint house, silence and a glare. You don’t bother asking him what’s wrong you already know why exactly he’s looking at you with his narrowed eyes and a deep frown.
“Billy-” you begin hoping to soften the blow by explaining your poor choices in picking fights with men who are three times your size and have loaded guns at their hips.
“No… don’t.” Billy stops you mid-sentence as he walks over to you, his hands immediately grasping yours as he assesses the damage to knuckles, split and redraw. A soft sigh escapes his lips whilst his thumb gently soothes the back of your hand.
“Christ, what have I told?” He asks, his frown deepening slightly as his eyes meet yours full of worry and frustration.
It’s the second time something like this happened, the last time Billy was there to stop you this time however he wasn’t, instead he found out from people talking about it around town.
Hushed whispers about how ‘Billy’s girl throws a mean punch’ and how you were ‘more trouble than you’re worth’. It was already a rough time in Lincoln without you adding to the mix, he just can’t keep up with it all.
Perhaps that’s why he is much more angered by this than he probably should be. “I know but if you would’ve heard them— what they were saying...” You try and reason with him as you recall the muttered insults about him, the threats and the way they dragged your name into their snide remarks.
“You’re getting into fights over some words.” He sneers as if it was the most stupid thing he’s heard. He tugs your hand as he guides you to sit down at the kitchen table and you can’t help but bite the inside of your cheek nervously as you watch him rummage through the cabinets looking for a first aid kit with a mean frown, the tension so thick it was almost hard to breathe.
Any words you thought might’ve defended your actions die on your tongue and you’re left speechless as he cleans your knuckles with a damp clean rag, his hand holding yours.
“I don’t think you realise how dangerous this is… it takes one of em’ to pull their gun out and then what, huh?” He snaps glaring up at you with narrowed eyes, the light of the lamp flickers across his face casting a shadow across his deep frown.
Billy catches on to how you bite the inside of your lip and the way your eyes begin to gloss over. He hates how the guilt immediately starts to eat at him. He takes a deep breath. “You can’t keep this up… do you understand?” He whispers, his blue eyes gleaming with fear.
The room is heavy with silence as you nod your head whilst he continues to clean the cuts on your knuckles, the sensation stings a little but it’s nothing compared to the sight of his disapproval.
“I’m sorry… I just can’t stand it.” You whisper, finally breaking the silence as you look down at the way he handles you with such great care almost as if you were made from glass.
Billy looks up at you and his expression softens slightly with understanding because he damn well knows that if he ever caught anyone bad-mouthing you he’d make them regret it… but that doesn’t change the fact that he hates seeing you hurt for his sake.
“I know…” he breathes before holding up your hands slightly so you can get a good look at the cuts that split across your knuckle. “I can handle that… but this… this I can’t.” He tells you, squeezing your hands ever so softly.
His rough hands cup either side of your face and his blue eyes meet yours with worry but there’s a deep love that flickers within them that you don't miss. “You gotta stop baby… I can’t lose you.” He whispers, his voice breaking with vulnerability.
A shaky breath escapes your lips as he presses his forehead against yours, “Alright... alright." You promise, pausing briefly before speaking once again, "I love you, Billy.” You whisper softly and your heart melts at the sight of the smile that teeters against his lips.
“I love you too… so damn much.” He tells you and although his voice is gentle there’s still a certain sincerity in his tone that makes your head spin.
Billy presses his lips to yours in a slow, meaningful kiss, holding your face as if you were going to vanish into thin air. He needs you to be alright or he fears he might just lose the last threads of his sanity.
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