#but i need to actually look at my outline and think about the chapter layouts

[illuminatedferret]

Crack fic updates: im at 16k words but theyre all disjointed 2k scenes so god knows when any of them will be completed. Chapter 1 of the prequel is still missing one scene because ive been writing more of the actual crack fic instead. Ive basically got the ~first chapter and a half of both fics done rn. My hopes and dreams are so high right now. Im gonna be so mad if i dont finish this

[fireblossumdraws]

For those interested in reading Emblem of the Siren

this is a psa, personal notes, and revisions to be seen in the new and revised chapters in the works. What has changed as far as characters, plot and the creator (me! )

As some of you have known as I have hinted multiple times, that the fanfiction has been up for years and has not received an update other than disclaimers. That's because my only use for it by this point has been as a crude outline for the rewritten version. Which I don’t want to hide either, even if I would like to because of it’s bad attempt at crass subject matter and traumatic concepts that could have been detailed more tastefully. I was an angry kid when I started writing. Thanks to receiving tons of therapy and life development, I feel that I can tackle those subjects from a more realistic standpoint rather than the sheltered worldview that I used to have.

With that being said, certain characters will not receive the significant changes, evil or not. And there will be a list designating who to expect that from and why.

Key characters that will receive no changes in the updates:

• Ostegoth (he deals, he smokes, we love ostegoth in this house and he does no wrong in his choices to pinch a coin/relic!)

• The Lord of Bones and subjects (He is an abusive monarch in cannon. I don’t think I could really rewrite it without sacrificing any personality traits and same goes for everyone else. I gotta keep the plot spicy somehow *shrugs* he keeps his satisfying end.

• Draven (the evil characterization does not suit him at all! For someone as neutral in the story, he’s a mentor and a bro, will remain that way in the update)

List of characters receiving drastic changes:

• Genevieve (Even if the basic layout will remain the same, [Which I will entail in a bio later on!] girl needs a confidence boost amongst other things. I wrote my oc without any experience in the industries that she were in on Earth and I unfairly wrote it out as something that she should be ashamed of. A similar backstory has been made with room to overcome and develop through. I am also adding certain flashbacks as well to highlight her character)

• Vulgrim (overly misogynistic, no chill, not cool. He will have more significance late story to demand changes in his character now)

• All Makers ( some changes of certain terms that could be considered misogynistic (in Thane’s case, thankfully they never made the final cut) but they are written as cinnamon rolls that need not a change other than their butchered dialect. Sorry for those, European readers.

• Death (he is emotionally ambiguous unless it concerns those he cares about. Though, he will be given the least amount of changes within the plot the way it is, but interactions are the main concern. I thought the intimate lines throughout the story were great work and somehow I was commended for them. However, the ones that are close without intimacy such as the first encounter and up to chapter 12, came across to me as far too cold and even the later scrapped chapters after that were the same. It was another situation of traumatic projection that I've long figured out how to handle. His personality is the same, a rude old one with a dark and mysterious emotional wall. One that's breakable with the proper writing and warmth. Y'know, like Fury. Only worse 🙃)

With all of that being said, the fanfiction will remain up to read. I cannot keep u from looking up the outdated version. But know this dude, How to write more ethically came along as well. I am willing to try again.

Doing that in writing this story in comic form in the meantime of the actual writing!

Have a variant for getting this far! 🥰

Thank u!

[bugcatcherwill]

can we have some writing tips, like how are you able to update the RATC fanfic every saturday? with job and etc. in the mix?

Oh boy, do I! So this is general writing tips, but also a window into my process so this might not work for others as well.

Basically I have a loose weekly schedule. I try not to stick to something more rigid because I know who sets the guidelines (me) and that person is full of shit.

The weekly schedule goes a bit like this: Early in the week, come up with what events I want to write for this current chapter and start drafting the general layout. Middle of the week is where the bulk of the writing happens. And then the Fridays are usually reserved for editing and touchups. Basically I try to have it all written or mostly written by Thursday so I don't force myself to scramble together that week's chapter. Saturday morning, I give it another few read-throughs for last minute editing and post it to AO3 in the afternoon.

What's important is that you make the most of your time while not-writing. They say 10% of a writer's job is actually writing and 90% of it is thinking about writing - and that couldn't be more correct. The amount of plot hooks that just...came to me while driving or in the shower is too many to count. And being away from that monolithic, sterile Google Doc REALLY helps clear your mind. Basically before I sit down and start my chapter, I make sure I have a gameplan of what I want to write first, so I'm not just floundering when I actually have some free time to write.

A big tip I have is find out what's the best way to write for your current schedule/comfort zone. Most of my writing I do on my phone. Seriously. I'm one of those freaks lmao. But I found out it's so much easier to avoid distractions of Youtube, Discord, Social Media, when all I have is my phone screen in front of me and I have to actually switch apps to distract myself. It also lets me do a bit of writing when there's a lull at my job, or when I'm on the exercise bike at my house.

So, yeah, a big part of what allows me to make these weekly updates is that time management, but also I've pretty much blocked so much of my story either in my head or in a Google Doc that writing it out thankfully doesn't feel like a chore :)

Also another tip: as much as you might hate outlines, you're probably gonna have to make an outline at some point. I, for one, HATE outlines. But I found a way to make my outlines a lot less unbearable.

What you do, is you don't write out your entire story's plan from the get-go. Because doing so makes it a LOT harder to squeeze in some plot point that you just came up with in the shower and you REALLY wanna put in there, but the outline says you can't. Outlines are like post-its. They're a good reminder, but you shouldn't be afraid of ripping them off the wall when you no longer need them - because that's what they're meant for.

I actually have two outlines that I use: the macro-outline and the micro-outline. The Macro-outline is basically just a bullet-point list of the major story beats I plan to have. Nothing too structured, nothing too complex, just a list of the big events and plot hooks. Then the micro-outline only goes over the next 2-3 chapters. It allows me to block out the actual chapters before I write them, and lets me look at the general story of those snippets and go "is that what I want to do?"

This, I feel, gives me a lot more flexibility in the story. Since if I come up with a plot hook I'd like to add, I can add that into the Macro-outline list, and then think about where I want to place that in the general timeline of events.

This is a bit of a wall of text, but I hope this helps! :D

[birlwrites]

what's your advice for writing longfics? i literally cannot for the life of me.

ok so i stumbled into writing longfics by accident - there was a long time in my life when i too was like 'there's no fucking way i could write one of those,' and then i started coming up with story ideas that i literally could not fit into under 100k words, and now here we are

there are 3 big categories of 'things that will help you,' imo, which are:

keeping your ideas organized, so you don't have to worry about forgetting things

giving yourself flexibility, in case your story starts to go in a different direction from what you outlined

staying motivated - absolutely 100% the hardest part. i'll talk about that last, since the first two are very important for the last one

i think the most important thing to consider is what length will genuinely suit the story you want to tell. that's a matter of things like how intricate the plot is, how many things happen in the story, basically just how much space you need

longfics aren't going to be right for every story and if you try to expand something that really is like 20-25k worth of story into something that's like, 50k+, you're going to struggle a lot

but let's say you have a big story idea that will need a lot of space in order to work! next step: figure out how you're going to keep track of everything.

(this is a LONG POST)

Keeping Your Ideas Organized

if you're writing a shorter fic, you can just scroll through the whole thing looking for a particular detail you want to reference. if you're writing a long fic, you don't want to be wasting your time on that. and you will forget things! i guarantee you will. so you need a way to keep track of plot points and details, in order to make sure you aren't abandoning plot lines and you have continuity

for me, i do this in a few different ways - and i'm speaking about my process for atfhv, which is different from my process for stga, which is also long but has a much simpler plot (so there was less to keep track of)

your mileage may vary, but this is what i do when i have a lot going on (complicated plot, many characters and moving parts):

keep an outline of chapters, in which i write down where i put certain exposition/information, so i can refer back to it quickly.

things i generally include:

plot points/things that happen in that chapter/section (this includes character arc developments)

exposition/worldbuilding/backstory/lore

characters that are introduced in that chapter/section

foreshadowing/setting up future plot points

keep an archive of lore for continuity purposes, by which i mean your worldbuilding, your plot ideas, character information, the little details - e.g., in my doc for atfhv, i have stuff like character mannerisms and backstories, the layouts of important buildings, lists of magical items, plants, and spells, worldbuilding, etc etc etc.

this is so that you don't have to rack your brains trying to remember some specific detail - you always have something to refer to! (you'll also need a way to search through that archive quickly - personally, i have a very detailed table of contents with hyperlinks to section headers, but i can also just search up phrases if i don't remember what sections they're in)

keep an outline - you don't necessarily have to have everything planned out (having a super precise plan may actually cause you problems later - i'll get into that below), but you need some way to keep track of all the plot arcs/points you have in mind - otherwise you will forget some of them. and make sure that however you organize that outline, it can be changed later

which leads me very neatly into the next part!

Giving Yourself Flexibility

there is a long-running joke about how writers will have a plan for what their characters are going to do and then their characters will decide to do completely different.

this is because when we're writing, our brains are thinking about the story on both a conscious and subconscious level - you may pick up on things subconsciously that you didn't intentionally put in there, and now all of a sudden your plan doesn't feel like it fits anymore

and that is a good thing! the last thing you want is to try to jam a story into an outline that doesn't fit.

so, there are multiple ways to do this. if you're writing an entire draft before posting any of it (in which case i commend you for your restraint), then you can pretty easily just go back and edit what you already wrote, or even re-draft if you decide things are going in a really different direction. so you're in a position where it's easier to have a detailed outline because if you need to throw large chunks of it out the window, you can just do that

if you're posting as you go, like i generally do, you need to approach this a little differently. the first question you should ask yourself is: how willing are you to make changes to things that have already been posted?

there's no right/wrong answer to that question. i will say, just as a warning, that you probably don't want to make drastic plot or character changes to what's already been posted after the fact - people who are reading update-by-update will be super confused. but consider how much you're willing to change.

if it's a lot, you can get a little more fine-grained with your outline.

if it's only a little (like me afjshgksjdf - i will fix grammar/spelling errors but basically Nothing else), then you should be giving yourself more flexibility with your outline, to prevent future you from spinning in circles trying to figure out how to make everything fit

which doesn't mean you can't have ideas about how things will go, long-term - it just means that you need to be comfortable with the idea that things will definitely change, and they might change very dramatically from your initial vision. that's perfectly okay, and you can always write another version if you want to!

to that end, i really, really recommend having some sort of document where you put things you like that you have to cut or get rid of. it makes it much easier to get rid of them, emotionally speaking, and you can also refer back to that document if you find a place for those things later

if you're posting as you go, i also recommend mostly writing the fic in order, because your subconscious will pick up on things better that way (plus, less editing later on - as we've established, editing is harder to do when you're posting before the whole thing is completed)

if you're doing the entire draft before posting anything, then it really does not matter what order you write scenes in (although you'll definitely want to read through the whole thing for continuity)

all of this means that in your outline/ideas document/however you're keeping track of plot and character arcs, you need to make sure there's room for you to make changes.

when i was writing stga, as i said above, the plot was much less complicated. i ended up using a private discord channel to keep track of what i was thinking, which worked pretty well because i could pin the key messages, edit messages, delete them if they were no longer relevant, etc

for atfhv, that wouldn't have worked for me, because there's just way more to keep track of (and just because that wouldn't work for me doesn't mean it can't for you - i'm more trying to explain what i've needed for different stories so you can decide what to try)

so for atfhv, i have a trello board for plot points, which works well for me because i can build it all out as i go (i have a column for each month and then the cards in each month are organized chronologically)

i also use color-coded labels to classify plot points (some examples: 'war,' 'school,' various relationship arcs), which is really helpful for me because then i can see all the different plot arcs and note if some color just vanishes randomly - that means i need to check to see if i've abandoned that plotline

and then i can move cards around really easily, archive ones that don't work without getting rid of them forever, etc - so i like that a lot

once again: it is absolutely, perfectly OK to change your plot. if that means you have to cut something you really wanted to include, i highly recommend writing another fic that does include that - don't just cut yourself off from things you want to write because they don't fit into your 'current' or 'primary' wip (if you have such things)

aaaaaand now we get into the hardest part.

Staying Motivated

longfics are super daunting. like. super daunting. i don't think there's really a way to get away from that feeling. it'll come and go.

so i don't have a perfect solution for how to stay motivated on a long project. but here are my suggestions for what will help:

write it because you love it. nothing else will be enough to get you to see it through. write story ideas you really enjoy. put in things you think are fun or interesting. make the actual writing process as enjoyable as possible for yourself, rather than something you're forcing yourself to grind through because you think other people will like it

make it bite-sized. don't tell yourself 'i have to write this massive longfic.' break it down into smaller pieces. i usually break it down into chapters. that is how you write any long story - piece by piece. it's much less intimidating and it's also just how long projects work lol

take breaks. if you post as you go, i recommend setting up a posting schedule where you post chapters slower than you write them. that way, you can take breaks when you want them. and there's no shame in putting a project on hiatus. unless you have a literal actual deadline you have to meet, there's no reason to rush it. do not force yourself to write if it feels like a chore. you don't want to drain all the joy out of something you're doing for fun

don't fall in love with your statistics or activity or any other measure of engagement. this one is hard for me afjskghksjdf. here's the thing: if you're at the point where you know exactly how many comments or kudos or subscriptions or bookmarks or hits your fic has, you are paying too much attention.

that means if you notice some sort of dip in your statistics - maybe some people unsubscribed or un-bookmarked, maybe you didn't get as many comments on a chapter as you normally do - it can feel really heartbreaking. you're pouring a lot of time and energy and effort and love into this story, and it can be very upsetting to feel like you're not getting anything back.

this is why it's so important to make sure that all of that work is for an end product you will actually enjoy, with a process you enjoy. if you're only creating it for engagement, then when you hit a slump (which is inevitable), it'll be incredibly demoralizing.

and i won't lie - even if you *are* creating something you really enjoy, it can still be upsetting to realize people aren't engaging with it. we share stories because we think others will appreciate them. it's okay to want some sort of reciprocal engagement.

and that's why it's so important not to look too much at your numbers. can't get sad about a drop in subscribers if you don't know how many subscribers you have in the first place!

of course, it's basically impossible to really have no idea, unless you're having someone else post your fic for you so you never have to look at it - but just pay attention.

if you notice yourself reflexively checking your statistics, or refreshing your email inbox looking for ao3 emails about comments or kudos, it's time to step back.

write the parts you want to write. i know i advocated writing mostly in order earlier in this post - this part is why i don't advocate writing ENTIRELY in order. in any story, there are the really important parts, the parts we're super excited to write, the parts we really love - and then there's also the connective tissue that makes those parts make sense. if you feel like you're slogging through connective tissue, take a break and write one of the parts you're really excited about

(and, yeah, if you're writing it super ahead of time you may get to that point in the story and realize you have to completely rewrite it - this happens to me ALL THE TIME. that's another good reason to keep a document where you store things you had to cut!)

remember that it's normal to feel unmotivated sometimes. everyone goes through highs and lows with creative projects. if you feel like it's all bad and you don't want to work on it and it wasn't even a good story idea in the first place, you may just need to eat, sleep, shower, go outside, take a break, do something else, etc. take a deep breath and come back to it when you feel ready. it's supposed to be fun.

getting comfortable with change is also a way to help with staying motivated - if you feel like something isn't working anymore, change it, rather than forcing yourself to stick with it

work on other stories when you want to. you're not OBLIGATED to do this, but having a longfic in progress doesn't mean you're forbidden from working on anything else.

i absolutely prioritize working on ttdl over other stories - it's the only one i'm actively posting, and it is also the one i'm most interested in lol. but i have a lot of side projects! so if i want to write in a different style, from a different pov, about something different, i can do that, instead of forcing myself to slog through something i'm not feeling in the moment.

this is the equivalent of taking a stretching break. don't burn yourself out on your story by chaining yourself to it. that doesn't help anyone

don't strive for perfection. it will never be perfect. never ever ever. 'perfect' is this static thing that doesn't actually allow for any nuance, and attempting to write something 'perfectly' can be super demotivating because it's... not actually very specific?

if you want to improve your writing (a completely valid and admirable goal), pick specific skills you want to improve. one or two at a time. look up tips on how to write those things effectively. practice by writing snippets or one-shots or shorter fics. but don't aim for 'perfect,' because 'perfect' doesn't actually mean anything.

lastly, trust yourself.

this applies to everything from pacing to plot ideas. you know the story you want to tell. trust yourself about how to tell it.

and remember that 'writing longfics' isn't some sort of innate personality trait or characteristic - it's not something you're either capable or incapable of doing. there's no benchmark or standard you have to meet in order to be 'qualified' to write a long story. if you want to try it, then try it! worst-case scenario is that you don't finish it, and having unfinished stories is the most normal thing in the world.

i hope that's helpful! if you have more questions, please do let me know. best of luck with your writing endeavors!

[superflatpsyche]

How to Make Comics

Hello! I definitely meant to answer this question earlier, but I knew it’d end up being a really long post, so I wanted to be able to sit down and answer this properly.

First off, I’d decide what kind of comic I want to create. Will it be a huge epic? A gag-a-day comedy? Will it ever be printed?

With digital comics, you could give each page a different-sized layout or even animations if you wanted to! These are all things that are hard to translate into a physical book. You also wouldn’t need to worry about things like page bleed. Or color choices - in my experience, digital art prints way darker than you’d expect.

The stories I have planned and am currently working on are graphic novels, so I don’t have much advice when it comes to newspaper-styled weeklies. But, if this is the kind of stuff you want to make, then my tips might help!

My starting point for making comics was having some character designs lying around that I wanted to use for something. Some people come up with the story first, but for me, it was the characters. If that’s your style, then concept art is a good way to plan out the “feel” of your comic:

IMO it’s very easy to fall into the trap of drawing concept sketches forever, so at some point, you will need to move on to outlining the plot of your comic and writing your first draft. All first drafts suck, so once you’ve reached the end, you’ll immediately have to go back and edit things as needed.

Some resources I used to figure out how writing works are Wired For Story by Lisa Cron, as well as Jim Butcher’s Livejournal posts.

Comics invariably take a long time to make unless you choose a super-simple art style, so I included things like camera angles and other details in my script, to remind myself how to draw a particular scene when I finally reached it. Here’s the script version of a page I finished and posted a while back:

Scripting your entire comic this early on means that you won’t be investing huge amounts of time into making any changes to the story. Rewriting is much faster than redrawing.

The next big step is sketching thumbnails of how your comic pages will look. Ideally, you’ll want to have finalized sketches of every single page before going any further, but you could do one chapter at a time, depending on your workflow. Here’s what that looks like:

At this stage, I’m mostly focusing on page layout, panel shapes, and speech bubble placement. It’s also a helpful tool to see where your double-page spreads can go (this is when two pages of a physical book are used to create a single, double-wide comic page).

And now comes the fun stuff: deciding what size your comic should be. I didn’t want to think about this at all, so I just grabbed this template from online:

And also this template for double-page spreads:

And these are the sizes I draw Control Freak at, with a resolution of 350 DPI (the minimum recommended resolution for printing is 300 DPI).

Thanks to these templates and the groundwork laid down in the last steps, I can now actually start making the comic! Here’s how I use the template - note that all of the speech bubbles are placed in the “live area”, where they won’t be cut off during printing.

And here’s the finished page:

Now repeat for as long as it takes to finish your comic!

I personally recommend picking a very manageable art style, as comics take ridiculously large amounts of time to make (I have learned Many Things about this from working on Control Freak), but you do you!

Hope this helps you make whatever comics your heart desires ^^

[mangoisms]

hi!! i'm a fan of your fics and your writing and im so curious to know your writing process? like, how you outline, the programs you use to organize chapters, etc etc. would u be willing to explain it? i've been trying to organize my stories better and u seem to have a great grasp on it. i'm also willing to come off anon if you'd prefer to answer privately or smthn lol!

hi!!! thank you so much!!!! i have no problem explaining everything here, no worries! i'm happy to talk about it if it'll help out others ^_^ it'll be under the cut since this got long... sorry T_T

so, for me, when it comes to fic ideas, i usually know it's something feasible if i have more than a few scenes in mind, along with maybe some pieces of dialogue, and i know i can sit down and actually outline. for, say, wwt, i got that idea when i was writing dgfh and i knew immediately it was something i wanted to do and go in more depth on. (but some stuff is just a passing interest that i can talk about it but not something that i can actually do, if that makes any sense? like when i'm done talking about it, that's pretty much it.)

then with outlining, i like a concrete layout for things. i tend to have my outlines in notion for quick reference anywhere. i have a specific brainstorming template that i used for frmb, dgfh, wwt, and the others and it looks like this

(this can be edited, of course, with things added and things removed) another part of my process -- i tend to need a general scope of the landscape but it's not as hard as it seems. usually i just google [city name] neighborhoods and i'll have the city itself pulled up in maps or something to get a handle on directions.

aside from that, i've also found it incredibly helpful to outline/write out specific beginnings and endings. the beginnings are easier but endings are wayyyy harder and i know i need to put something done otherwise it might not come together how i want it. it's not necessarily a specific point, but rather more of a scene, like a vision for the end.

(i don't know if ANY of this makes sense btw so if you have any more questions, please feel free to let me know!)

but ok, back to outlining. one thing for me that i did for wwt and then again with that new tim fic (that i still need to make an acronym for...) is that i actually wrote out a rough outline in my journal and then i copied it to notion and elaborated more on certain points as more ideas came to me.

sometimes i have the urge to outline strictly in notion -- which is what happened with frmb -- but other times i like to actually write things out and then i'll copy it to notion just because i don't always have my journal.

alongside this, i also love making playlists! playlists are soooo central for my fics! genuinely i can't have a fic without a playlist LOL.

once all of that is fulfilled -- i can start writing! for me, i use a combination of google docs and a writing program called scrivener. google docs is mostly for when i'm writing on my phone. when i'm on my laptop, i will use scrivener 95% of the time.

i bought and downloaded scrivener from here. it's $59 USD but they have an education discount that's based on an honor system, so you don't even have to be a student/prove you are a student and it's $50 USD.

the good thing about scrivener, though, is you're buying a license to it, which means once you buy it, it's yours forever. no subscription nonsense or anything, which i really like. for that, i think it's super super worth it to get it. i also think, with all the capabilities scrivener has (which i'll get into), it's not as expensive as it could be. but of course, it still is an expense, but i've had it for four/five years now and it's absolutely paid for itself.

so, within project files, you can do things like set word count goals for chapters, keep track of your statistics and writing history, organize folders, etc etc. this is what frmb's project file looks like

and i kept dgfh and wwt in one project file since they weren't that long/big on their own, so this is what their project file looks like

there is just. SO MUCH you can do and i haven't even really figured out how to use everything or what tools there are. literally right now as i'm typing this and clicking around on scrivener, i apparently discovered that it has. a whole ass name generator

this certainly could've have come in handy earlier.... but now i know. and now you and everyone else knows! so. i write primarily in here and i also do my editing here. i won't get into the editing but scrivener also has a tool that lets you compile chapters into an epub file, which i've utilized to edit/read much more closely in book format.

so that's really it. i use notion for outlining and then i use scrivener for writing and organizing everything else! i hope this answered your question and i'm terribly sorry this got so long but if you have any other questions/i didn't cover something, feel free to let me know ^_^ i don't mind at all!

[thedayaftertomorrow]

I've been writing a lot again, and I think I'm actually gonna finish this story! :) I'm really happy with it. Anyways, here are some writing tips I needed to hear that I've had to figure out myself. Hopefully it can help you if you need it! Sorry it's so long, I'm a passionate little bastard!

So first, I wanna say that it's okay to let go of the standard way of doing things. You don't have to write in Times New Roman, you don't have to have 20 page long chapters (who says some of them can't be four pages or less? Just look at Maximum Ride), you don't have to plan out the entire book before you write it. Do what works for you. I used to write in Times New Roman on my laptop and it just wasn't working for me. So I made changes and now I write how I want to! For me this was writing in a soft, comfy font that I like (Comfortaa). I also write on my phone because getting my laptop out took a minute and was just another excuse to put off writing. So I write on Google docs on my phone and it makes writing so much easier. I write while I eat, while I'm falling asleep, while I'm laying on the couch, while I shower or go to the bathroom, while I brush my teeth, etc. I can write my book anywhere, anytime.

I have a bunch of documents, one for each thing I need: book, table of contents, character traits/outlines, ideas/important notes, potential quotes (where I write scenes that I want to include in the future or even just good dialogue quotes I think of and wanna incorporate), deleted scenes (where I put scenes that didn't work), plot outlines, my thoughts about my book (where I rant to the void about what I'm excited about/how I feel about my book because I can't tell people about it yet) And that's not even all of them. There's like twenty at least. If you have a thing you want to jot down and no place for it, it's okay to make a document for it. You can't keep ALL that info in your brain permanently, love.

I don't look at how many pages I have very often. This is another reason why using docs on my phone is so nice. I can't see the page count unless I turn on print layout! So I'm not stressing about how many more pages I need to write.

I have a plot outline but I don't follow it to a T, and there's plenty of wiggle room. I planned for a couple weeks before writing and now I'm planning and changing the rest of the plot as I write it. Planning and writing is a delicate balance as far as finding what works for you, but I've learned that I can't plan for a year, then write, cause I'll loose interest before I even write the first chapter.

I saw a similar tip to this one on Tumblr actually and tweaked it to work for me. I can feel it when what I'm writing isn't working. If feels like I can't write anymore from here. I feel like giving up. I feel like I ruined the book. What I do when this happens is figure out what element is ruining it (examples I've done: 1. Adding magic [and I think fairies too?] out of nowhere. 2. Having two characters, who are friends, physically fight over something small when really they'd never do that. 3. Taking electricity out of my story. 4. Introducing a character too soon and in a way that's our of character for them.). Then I get rid of that entire section (this can be several pages long, or even more) and I put it in my deleted scenes doc and delete it from my book. I then continue like that never happened and it works again! I just go "well that doesn't work. It's hard to get rid of it, but let's get rid of it and move on!" Don't give up. Change it.

I made my book one that I'm obsessed with. I have to be its biggest fan or it won't get written. It needs to be a story I love with settings I love, with characters I love. So I mashed a few story ideas of mine together (all of which didn't work on their own, like I couldn't get more than twenty pages out of them), added some excitement to it, and got a story I love. It has things I wanna talk about, writing it helps me work through issues I'm upset about within my self, and I think about my characters and scenes every day, almost all day. Make something you can become obsessed with. If it's just an okay story to you, you probably won't wanna write it.

I have a balance of comfy, cozy scenes and exciting, dangerous scenes. This keeps me happy and excited, and should hopefully make future readers neither stressed or bored.

I do things for my book other than write. I draw maps and floor plans of the settings. I'm bad at drawing people but I draw some of my characters. I write down my favorite quotes from my characters. I even made a stuffed animal that one of my favorite characters has and it's adorable! This keeps me interested in my book and helps me get my creative juices out more. The maps also help a lot with seeing the world and explaining how things look and work.

I did my best to make all of my important characters people who are rounded out, flawed, talented, and interesting. Some characters are based a little off of a vibe. I have a character who feels like a pirate. She's not, but she feels that way to me and it kind of helps me build her character. I made my main character the person I often wish I was. The love interest is someone powerful and independent that I'd love to date. One of my other main characters is the opposite of what you'd think he'd be.

I made my villains interesting and dynamic. I have one who isn't even evil, he's just neutral. I have another who's trying to do good but going about it all wrong. They aren't just evil, they have their own goals and lives, families and friends and lovers. But then some of them are just evil, because some real people are just evil, nothing more, no reason for it.

Oh, and another thing. I've seen so many posts saying to have a clear goal for your character, but I can't figure out how to do that for the life of me, so I just write and let it work itself out. I don't know what my goal is in my own life, how should I know theirs? They're just people doing their best.

I hope at least some of this can help somebody. Have a great week :)

[ravenonice]

Update on my ongoing fics! (and fun facts)

In case you're here because of my fics, here's a little update everything concerning those :D

I just started my semester abroad in Scotland. Since I'll be working and I want to travel a bit too, I will be busy...so I am not entirely sure yet how much time I'll have for writing... So updates might come even less regularly than they already are...I'm sorry.

As for specific fics:

Playlist of a Love

I've run into a stupid problem here... I have a notebook that contains the scores and layouts for Yuuri's short and free for the rest of the season, as well as Viktor's free (I've decided to not think of a short for him because it's really not relevant at all...). And I left that Notebook in Germany...in a box...in a self storage place...because I'm stupid...

The next few chapters are centered around Yuuri's programs and the story they tell and how that story changes a lot. The scores are fairly important for that too because a lot of Yuuri's perception of himself is based on those. Without wanting to spoil too much, but I think I established this in the last two chapters, it's a big part of how Viktor and Yuuri communicate emotions with each other.

So, in order to continue the story line like I intended too...I need those scores and notes on the programs...

I'll need to do that all over again and it's going to take some time and a lot of effort...and I don't know if I'll have that time and energy any time soon...

So this fic is on ice (badum tss...) for an uncertain amount of time, I'm sorry.

It's a shame really because a lot of it is allready written or outlined...but the key conecting pieces are simply missing...

Outlook on the future of the story (aka: why you maybe want to bear with me ^^'):

I have a halfway finished one shot prequel for PoaL regarding Viktor's childhood that I want to post when we get to that part in the story. It just doesn't fit in the flow of the story telling, so I'm posting it seperatly.

I also started writing a prequel for Yuuri which will be considerably longer than Viktor's....and I really shouldn't do that before finishing the main story...but the thing is is that PoaL is basically finished in my head...but not on "paper"...and I need to write it down because it also helps me understand my version of Yuuri better and how to write him, same reason why I write the Viktor one shot. Maybe I'll start posting it alongside PoaL as soon as it wouldn't spoil anything anymore.

I have a whole ass fanfiction in my notes app which's whole purpose is for me to practice writing smut with plot because I never published smut before...but there will be smut in PoaL and I want it to be damn good. If anyone is interested in a snipet of that while you wait I'm happy to provide that ;) As for the plot part: Viktor has commitment issues, Yuuri takes whatever he can get.

Hearts of Glass

I'm actually halfway through the 4th chapter! This chapter will conclude the World Championships arc and we will soon move on too Yuuri's Hasetsu vacation and his training for the new season :D I'm really excited for this actually!

Fun fact: when I started writing I thought it would be a two chapter fic or a really long one shot to take my mind of PoaL for a moment...

At first I wanted Yuuri to win worlds and then resolve the issue after the banquet there... But then I got ideas for what a season with them being absolutly pissed at each other would look like and all the sexual tension and now this fic has about 14 chapters planned...uff...

I will continue to use irl programs as inspiration because I don't really want to make this more work for me than I have too...and I have Yuuri's programs planned.

Skip the next paragraph if you don't want any spoilers:

If you listen to the playlist to this fic, there is a hint for Yuuri's short programm ;)

Since Viktor isn't coaching Yuuri, I can't keep Eros and Yuri on ice... But: Viktor will get Eros.

End of Spoiler

I don't have a free for Viktor...I need something that works well with Eros but is also expressing the complicated romantic feelings he has for Yuuri. So if you have any ideas: Please leave them here! If you just know music that's great too honestly, I'm willing to make an exception on the low effort rule here if it means I get what I'm looking for ^^'

The Air I Breathe

I finished the 3rd chapter...but I hate it. Viktor is way too out of character and it's really just boring to read so I'll have to work on this a lot more...

As I mentioned before, there are 5 chapters to this fic, and all of them live in my notes app more or less finished, they just need polishing.

Fun fact: This was also meant to be a one shot! But in the very beginning, this was part of the very first draft of Playlist of a Love! I was sick with covid remember? So Yuuri had to deal with that...uups...

In that very early draft, the banquet night ended with Viktor putting his number on a scrap piece of paper and putting it behind Yuuri's phone case while he showers.

TW: Non-con

They had sex in that version and I cut that because I found that to overstep the boundaries and on what a healthy and trusting relationship could be built on... Yuuri was blackout drunk after all and I don't think Viktor would take advantage of that...and I also don't want to romanticize such things at all. Viktor scraped at that boundary in the version I have now enough...

End of TW

Yuuri does find the paper on the flight to Detroit, but he's way to confused and embarassed by what happened to actually call or text...

The season ends like it does in canon with Yuuri flopping at Nationals and not going to 4CC and Worlds. And also with the Stammi Vicino video.

So Viktor does show up and then there's a lot of hurt/ (no) comfort and i honestly don't quite know why I randomly decided to almost murder Yuuri in the process ^^' despite me having covid

It did not make any sense so I scrapped it all and replaced it with what I have now....which also still has parts that don't make sense and I need to smooth over...but oh well I'm getting there...

When I wrote Viktors backstory for PoaL I felt really sad and angsty...so I dug this out again and decided to turn it into a standalone fic.

Other updates in relation to my fics:

As mentioned before I have a ticket for the Saturday events of the Grand Prix Event in Sheffield! It's the first competition I will be at and I hope that I'll take some things with me that'll help me with describing competitions better!

I posted a very angsty one shot when I couldn't sleep and was really depressed....so if you are into main character death and dead soulmate AUs, Maybe my soulmate died... is for you ^^' I appologize in advance for possible mistakes and terrible writing...I did not read it again...I just couldn't...

So...that's the info dumb regarding my fics ^^' If you read this far: Thank you for your interest in my writing! I really appreciate you all <3

[patchies]

Shadows

Pairing: Dream x Reader x ???

Summary: An apocalyptic world where creatures of the night roam all around it. Searching for living beings to satisfy their hunger. Vicious creatures they are. It’s said that one person called upon their wrath in revenge. You awake in this place with another human being at your side. No memories whatsoever of the life you’ve had prior to coming here. In search of a way out, and your memories, you stumble upon multiple people with many personalities. Some can’t wait to meet you. If you take it the friendly or hostile way is up to you, but worry not... Nothing can hurt you. Or can it, now?

Warnings: depictions of gore

Word Count: 1.8+k

Author’s Note: This story is heavily inspired by a dream I had around two months ago and it pushed me into writing it. I haven’t ever thought that I would be writing and publishing a story. Let alone in English since it’s very far from my mother language, but I have to admit I like it way more. As I am pretty proud of it, I’ve decided why not just try? This story is not going to be updated very frequently as I hardly find time and motivation, but I have the whole story mostly planned out and I have plenty of ideas for it! There are 7 chapters written altogether as of now and I will try to update at least once a month. I’ve started writing longer chapters from the 6th and those will take longer to finish, but I sincerely hope you’ll enjoy it!

Wattpad link: here

story masterlist - main masterlist

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Chapter 1: The Awakening

Your eyes are met with complete darkness, unable to perceive your surroundings. The creepy, dusty and smoggy atmosphere isn't making you any less uneasy and confused either. Quite the contrary, actually. An unbelievable sickening feeling takes over your stomach and a great migraine is ever so present. Steering your thoughts to completely different places than they're supposed to. You feel the rapid thumping of your heart and panic floats in your head.

It takes you a few minutes until your dilated pupils get used to the blackness, but when they do, you're able to see the outlines of some demolished furniture. Upon fixating more on your surroundings, you distinctly spot the torn plain green wallpaper and empty broken picture frames hanged up on the wall. The tattered blinds covering the cracked windows tell you it's night and you seem to have gained consciousness in the middle of it.

Though, when you attempt to rethink through your day and previous whereabouts, you come up blank. Something like a heavy fog restrains your memories. A metaphorical lock put around it to secure them away from your conscious mind. As much as you try to concentrate on the past, you're left with nothing. It doesn't only leave you grasping for the forgotten past, but it makes you feel stranded and gasping of any, and very needed, recollection.

A sharp inhale of air makes your head rapidly turn in the direction of the sound and squint your eyes. You can hardly see the body of the person. The dark corner makes it difficult to focus, yet the figure still seems to take notice of you instantly, “Who are you…?”

Speaks up a very groggy voice and you can deduce their voice is coming from the shadows. Utterly hidden by the dark abyss. It sounds masculine, so you leave it at that, not taking too much interest in finding out any more information about the strange human. He seems to be in the same situation as you, but you still decide to be cautious around him. He's only a stranger to you, so you aren't going to blindly trust him. After all, stranger-danger is a rule, right?

You choose to stay guarded for now.

“Why does it matter to you?” You harshly reply. There really isn't anything to go off when it comes to his personality and intentions. As much as you'd like to be happy about seeing another human being, you don't know in what situation you are stuck in and you aren't the stupidest, neither the smartest, in the world. You'd rather stay cautious than die, “I'm surprised you have the audacity to speak to me even though you're obscuring your identity from me.”

“Well, if I tell you my name, will you tell me yours?” The stranger suggests, but you're inclined to not let him get through you.

“It doesn't matter to me. All I want is to get out and find whoever brought me here,” you simply say, “or search for my way home. That, doesn't have to involve you, nor your help.”

You turn your back to his voice, brushing him off with your words. Fixating your sight on the few boxes scattered throughout the room. You're sure he can feel your annoyance, but it's valid. He's making non-significant propositions, which is honestly irritable.

“I could help you. We could have each other's back.”

“What have I just said?” You inquire with an annoyed tint, “You have nothing of value to offer me, and you can't even step out of the shadows.”

With that said you slowly start to stand up from your position and look around for a possible exit. The floorboards creak under your weight as you step from foot to foot. The first thing that comes to your mind is to head straight for the windows for some unknown reason. Upon taking several steps to the blinds, you hear the stranger's footsteps echo. Your feet leisurely continue, but you're tempted to check behind you, therefore you do. Just in case he proves to have any malignant tendency.

There's still no silhouette of the other human, hence why you can't confirm what kind of a movement he's executed. With that done, you turn your head back and concentrate on the task at hand.

Once you get close enough to pull the blinds open, a loud screeching noise travelling throughout the whole street alerts both you and your companion. Blood pumps through your body at faster pace and you begin to be sceptical at heart upon hearing the scream of an unidentified creature.

“What the hell was that sound?” You can hear a slight waver in his voice. Presumably from not being able to decipher the inhuman noise from outside.

It didn't seem to scare you as much as it scared him. Although you did flinch back from the window, your guard has stayed high nonetheless the fright you experienced.

You shrug, but after realising he cannot possibly see you very well, you give him a response, “How am I supposed to know? Do you think I'm a witch?”

“Uh– yes and no?” After those words leave his mouth, your head turns to what you assume is his direction and give him a nasty glare. Offended thoughts swim in your head along with the throbbing pain of a headache.

A relatively loud scoff escapes your mouth and you fixate him with a harsh look.

You're sure he's going to die by either your hands, or he'll serve as sacrifice to the creature.

“You've chosen your destiny now, man.”

The scoff that leaves his mouth this time tells you that he's against the idea or he just plainly thinks you're joking. Either way, he's sold his soul by saying those words.

Cutting the conversation off, you finally get to glance outside the window, and you yell out a curse, which is enough to let the thing outside know of your existence. In the matter of seconds, it flies to your window and starts banging against it. It's long arms slam the panels with surprisingly little force. You fall back and try to scramble to your feet as quickly as you can. Can't go around risking your life even upon seeing the strength of the shadowy figure.

The man, who has chosen to stay anonymous up until now, decides against his better judgement to flee on his own to help you up. It doesn't show much strength, but the window already adores quite a few cracks, so you don't think it'll hold up for long.

“Just hurry up!”

As soon as you're stabilised and on both of your legs, you book it to the door. At first, the handle doesn't let you open them, but after a few sharp tugs it gives out and you fall to the floor again. You let out a curse once more, supporting your body on your forearms and stand up. The stranger only snickers behind you.

You stay silent and get your thoughts and clumsiness together.

“Here! We could hide in one of the other rooms!” He hurriedly tries to tug you to the direction he's talking about, but you don't budge. You can't take any risks when you don't know the house's layout and the person in front of you.

“I don't think it's a good idea,” you ponder over your thoughts, but after you hear glass being shattered, you run to another room and to the closest closet you can find. Completely disregarding the terrified look the man threw your way. You duck to the ground as hastily as you can and cover your mouth just in case. Soon wooden boards start creaking in the hallway and, even though you wished the man would be a sacrifice, you hope he's found a safe place and survives this monstrosity.

A rather loud groan is heard somewhat close to you and you peek through the small gap in the closet doors to see a rather disturbing view. One that you wish you haven't.

The creature has found a dead rat (rather beheaded the poor creature beforehand?) and is holding it to its bloody mouth now. Multiple sharp teeth sink over and over into the freshly killed animal, happily munching on the treat. It's turned sideways to you, so you can very clearly see all the contents of the rodent's body as it eats it. It's guts and blood spilling everywhere on the floor and on the demon itself.

You shudder, avert your eyes, and just look at your curled-up knees. ‘What in the name of hell have I just witnessed?’

It takes less than ten minutes to finish its fiesta and you can see the unidentified creature turn to smoke from your peripheral vision. It stays in that form and floats out of the room and you guess it leaves out the window it broke.

Silent tears start to fall down your eyes and you honestly aren't surprised. The whole encounter was traumatic to say the least. To you, it was as if you were the protagonist in a horror movie, being hunted down by some unknown force. Except this is real life that we're talking about. Your life is currently put at stake and you don't want to die so early. Be at the hands of the creature or some other mythical thing.

This won't be the worst thing to happen to you, Reader.  Or will it, now?

Was that demon chasing somebody before I yelled out?

It had seemed to be occupied by something else before you got startled by its presence on the little roof below the window. You can still remember the soulless holes for eyes staring in your direction vividly.

Was it me luring it to us? Could there be more people?

You sit there, contemplating the event that has just happened, for what seems to be forever. Blank stare put onto your hands as you cry and your body succumbs to total numbness. That is until the closet door creak open, forcing you to look up.

There stands a man of average height with messy brown hair. You notice just now how he exactly looks upon not having that much time to do so an hour (was it?) ago.

His eyes convey an emotion close to yours, which is utter fear and confusion. He silently offers you his hand and you gladly, albeit shakily, take it. He pulls you out the door and towards another room with a dusty and an almost broken bed, pulls you into his lap and tucks your head into his neck. Letting you quietly cry while he gently runs his hand across your back. You don't even care a stranger has you in his lap. He lets you cry until you have no more tears running down your cheeks.

Your guarded feelings towards the man begin to crack amidst the comfort you crave right now.

When you're done, you both can't get yourselves to break the silence. You’ve distanced yourself from him, but you both are too afraid to even utter a word and accidentally lure the creature back in. Although, he decides to break it with a small whisper and with an attempt of a comforting smile.

“Do you mind sharing your name with me now?”

[starsfic]

The Ghosts of Fiery Cloud Manor- Chapter 2: The Scholar's Manor

Summary: Xiaotian meets Tang and his partner.

AO3

-_-

"QI XIAOTIAN!"

The moment he stepped foot in the village, Xiaotian found himself freezing. The yelling was too close. Too close to the bark of his father. He slapped himself out of those thoughts, turning.

A man in a white and brown robe was hurrying up, red scarf fluttering after him. He came to a stop, leaning on his knees to pant. "Xiaotian, correct?" he said as he straightened, brushing dirt off his robe.

Xiaotian nodded, holding out his hand. "You must be Mr. Tang, right?"

The scholar gave his hand a firm shake. "Indeed, I am!" Tang said, using his other hand to fix his glasses. They turned at footsteps, watching another man, dressed in a yellow sweater, hurry up. "And this is my partner Sun Wukong."

"Like the Monkey King?" He couldn't help it. He had been obsessed with the stories since he was a kid.

For some reason, panic flashed across Tang's face. "Yes! Like the Monkey King! Not exactly like the Monkey King but close..."

Wukong took over at the scholar nervously laughed. "He's a big fan." He stage-whispered. "Anyway, kid, he saw your text and freaked out, thinking someone was still there and you were hurt or something."

"Actually…"

He explained about the lack of footprints in the dust and the paintings. Tang visibly calmed when he heard that there hadn’t been an actual intruder. “You’re right, the paintings still being there are a good sign.” He rubbed his chin in thought, not seeming to notice as Wukong wrapped an arm around his shoulder and start leading him down to the village, gesturing for Xiaotian to follow. “It’s possible that the stories kept any wannabe thieves away…”

“The stories?”

Tang glanced at him with a smile, his next words bearing a sharp contrast.

“Oh, the ghost stories.”

-_-

Sunlight drew Xiaotian from slumber. He didn’t get out of bed immediately, mulling over dinner last night.

In the inn’s dining room, over a meal of vegetarian noodles, Tang had laid down the history of Fiery Cloud Manor. Yes, the manor was built right where Red Boy, one of the most famous villains of Journey to the West, was claimed to live, giving the manor its name. One of Tang’s ancestors had built the manor centuries ago after he came back from studying in Britain. A few weeks after his sudden death, the manor had suddenly been abandoned and locked up and none of Tang’s family allowed to go in.

Which led to the rumors of ghosts.

But what kept playing Xiaotian’s minds was what Wukong had said, clearly not intending to be heard.

“Hopefully, ghosts are the only thing that’s in there…”

He finally pulled himself out of bed, stretching. He got dressed and packed a bag, a plan outlining in his mind. Tang didn’t have any maps of the manor, so Xiaotian would figure out the layout of the manor and get a feel for what was there and what needed to be done. He needed cleaning product and a unit more specific than ‘a lot’ would be helpful.

When he opened his door, the monkey waiting outside wasted no time in clinging to his front. “Seriously?” Xiaotian voiced, staring at the monkey. It gave a happy chirp. “This has to stop, you can’t get attached.” He continued on this vein as he walked downstairs, not even noticing the innkeeper, Mr. Syntax, watching until he chuckled.

“Good company?”

“He’s persistent,” Xiaotian said, plopping the monkey back onto the counter. “I’ll give him that. Hey, do you know if there’s anywhere I can get a packed lunch?” The monkey reached for his loose hair and he batted its hands away. “I want to get a full day out in the manor.”

“Oh, I’ll whip something up while you’re eating breakfast.”

Xiaotian thanked him and headed into the pub, ordering some dumplings. He couldn’t resist snapping a picture and texting it to Pigsy. Pretty good, but not as good as yours! A few minutes later, there was a response of Good. Miss you. Xiaotian sent back a miss you! before the innkeeper handed him a brown paper bag. He headed out and soon found the trail again.

The soft mist of morning lingered around him as he started his hike. Now that Xiaotian was slightly more awake, he noticed more details on his walk. Bull and monkey statues, worn away by weather and time, lined the path. Scattered here and there were wild peach trees, soft breezes scattering pink and white petals. With the sunrise, it was beautiful.

By the time Fiery Cloud Manor came into view, he was smiling. His smile stopped when he saw the closed gate…

And no headband.

Some critter must've gotten curious. At least he had a spare...which he had forgotten. Xiaotian pushed that aside and headed through the gate and to the door, making sure to wedge two large rocks he found to prop open the doors. When that was done, he studied the floor.

The entrance hall floor was made of red marble, gold veins cracking through it. The wallpaper was a similar shade of red- clearly, Tang’s ancestor hadn’t cared about how red on red would look- and when he wiped some dust away, he found a pattern of bulls. Above, a crystal chandelier would’ve offered light, but it was more spiderweb than crystal. Xiaotian shivered at the thought of spiders. “You probably have a lot of them,” he said out loud. His voice bounced off the walls, echoing into the depths. “You probably hate that- believe me, I would.”

Weirdly, he felt less weird talking to the house than the monkey.

“Let’s get to know each other.”

He set down the hallway, pulling out his phone to start his playlist. He hummed along to the music as he found more paintings, as well as vases and decorative armor and weapons. Which was weird. Wouldn’t someone take something like that when the house was abandoned? Xiaotian found himself pushing those thoughts away when he came to a traditional paper push door, a pair of large flames decorating it.

He pushed them open, sending dust scattering. The marble floor in this room had been replaced with wood with a reddish tint to it. Xiaotian moved his gaze up and yelped when he looked back.

"Okay." He said when his heart stopped racing. His several reflections repeated the motions of his mouth. "Mirrors. Didn't expect mirrors." Xiaotian headed in. There had to be windows somewhere, right?

Nope. All Xiaotian found in what he was recognizing as a ballroom were mirrors, occasionally broken by the white wall underneath. This room probably looked less creepy when the golden chandeliers above were lit. But for now, Xiaotian was glad to get out.

The rest of the manor was less creepy, thankfully. Four floors and an attic were open for examination. He found a door that must've led to a basement, but the door held firm when Xiaotian had tried to open it. He brushed it off, happy to wait to deal with that, and continued his exploration. Most of all, he found Tang wasn't kidding when he had said that the manor had been abandoned suddenly.

None of the furniture looked missing. The decor was still decorating. Some of the rooms still had clothes in their closets. Then Xiaotian entered the library. "Are you kidding?!" he yelled to nobody. "Who just leaves their books?!"

There wasn't a single gap in the bookshelves that filled the room. There was a marble fireplace, any fire having long since died out, and dusty furniture. There was a desk that, under further examination, looked like whoever had been writing had simply gone up to get a snack and had never come back. A portrait of a familiar woman- the same woman from the painting downstairs, that horn hairstyle was hard to miss- looked down at the desk with a look of distaste.

"I feel you." he told her.

He continued his examination, humming along to the next song to come on. He froze when a kid screamed for more candy. "Mei!" Xiaotian grabbed his phone, turning it on to show it had gone to his Don't Even Think About It playlist. In retrospective, he probably shouldn't have a playlist titled this. Or use Xiaojiao's birthday as his passcode.

He switched it to a different playlist and then turned to texting his best friend. You're five hours away, how are you still driving me crazy?

A minute later, his phone lit up with a call from Xiaojiao. He answered it and her giggle filled the library. "Sounds like someone found the new song!"

"Yeah, that horrible Disney remix. Thank you for that."

Xiaojiao let out a snort, soon calming. "So, how is it? Epic disaster or nice fixer-upper?"

Xiaotian looked around. "More like epic fixer-upper. Mr. Tang was right- this is the perfect place for a museum."

"How bad is it?"

That was another weird thing. For a house that had been abandoned for at least a century, there was surprisingly no damage. "Just some dust, cobwebs, and grime here and there. But seriously, this place is amazing."

"I see you found your soulmate."

He couldn't help his own snort of laughter. "Yes, I predict a spring wedding. I wish you were here to see it-" Something hit his back and he screamed. For a moment, there was nothing but panic.

Finally, the creature hopped off…

And the inn monkey blinked innocently up at him.

"MK?! Is everything okay?!"

"Fine!" Xiaotian said, feeling his heart race from the scare. "It's just the monkey."

"...the monkey?"

Said monkey let out a chirp before hopping up onto his shirt, reaching for the paper bag. "No," he told it, holding the bag as far as he could. "I will not feed you! Sorry, Xiaojiao, this monkey apparently likes to hop from the local nature reserve."

There was a coo from the other end before someone else spoke. "Okay, I have to go!" Xiaojiao said. Xiaotian froze at her planning voice. "Love you, bye!" And just like that, she was gone.

He was broken out of his confusion by paws batting at his hair and he gave in. "Fine." Xiaotian said, sitting down on one of those comfy-looking armchairs. "Let's see what we have that won't make you sick."

The bag was opened and he pulled out some noodles, Peking duck, white rice, and some spring rolls. Finally, Xiaotian found a bag of dried peach slices, marketed as peach chips. He popped open the bag and handed it over to the monkey.

They ate in companionable music-filled silence. The monkey occasionally paused to cock it's head. Then, when Xiaotian had finished his lunch and was placing the trash in the bag, it let out a series of chirps and squeaks, mimicking the tune. "You're a talented little guy, aren't you?" Xiaotian asked, reaching over to give it a head scratch. Realization struck a moment later.

Oh boy. He had gotten attached, to both house and monkey.

He could deal with that later, he mused as he leaned back, feeling sleepy. His stomach was full, the armchair was comfy, and the library was surprisingly warm, which all pushed him deeper into the abyss of slumber. It wasn't an issue. He could take a quick nap...

He didn't notice a figure watching him as his eyes fell shut.

[amfgeog2260]

A Glimpse of the Semester...

Everyone always says how fast semesters go once they get going, and it's true once again! It is crazy to think that we are already writing our final blog posts for this class, and it feels like last week that I was creating my first Tumblr account and following all of my classmates who I did not know anything about. I am not sure whether it is the format, the class, or the layout of our discussions but it feels as if this semester has had some of the most engaging and interesting discussions while I have been at university. I find it difficult to take a whole semester of readings, course content, assignments, and discussions with peers, and pack it into a relatively small blog post… but I am going to do my best! 

3 Things I Know About Human Geographic Research

1. The first thing I can say I know about human geography, is more broadly what it is, and how qualitative methods of human geography are used in human geography. The first chapter of the textbook does a really good job at outlining from the beginning what it is, and how its complexity and open-endedness can be used. What I mean by that is exactly what the textbook says, that qualitative methods in human geography are concerned with “elucidating human environments and human experiences” (Hay 2016, p. 5). Fundamentally, all of the analysis, research, interpretation, and methods employed by qualitative human geographic investigators circles back to the goal of answering questions related to social structures and or individual experiences (Hay 2016, p. 5). At the beginning of the course, this idea of tackling both structural macro questions/issues along with individual experience or micro issues was hard for me to conceptualize. At this point I have a better understanding of the goal of qualitative research, human geography, and the methods employed to find answers about social and human behaviour. 

2. I mentioned the breadth of human geography in my first point, which leads me to the second thing I know about human geography. I know now how much is captured in the term human geography, or human geographic research. Not only was the idea of human geography not clear to me, but the ideas and sub-topics of human geography were not either. From the textbook readings, weekly course content, and our newest Digital Storytelling Project, some of the most prominent subtopics of human geography have become more clear to me. We have all taken a different approach and topic in our group projects; from social, cultural, economic, political, health, environment, and the list goes on (Hooykaas 2021). These are only a few subtopics, and the important thing I realize now is that human geography is everywhere we look, and it matters in order to find answers and ask more questions about the world we live in! 

3. Since the topic of human geography is so broad and all-encompassing, I now know how important and diverse the use of research, knowledge, and analysis can be in the real-world with the help of human geography. The specific example from this course that allowed me to value knowledge, analysis, reflection and research most was the way we can use it to break down social barriers of knowledge. Using cross-cultural research methods, ethics, and relationships, we can impact more inclusive research methods and break down previously colonial ways of understanding knowledge (Hay 2016, p. 45). Specifically from chapter 4, we gained an appreciation and understanding of the way colonial values and power shaped our understanding of the validity of knowledge (Hay 2016, p. 76). Using different, and equally valuable knowledge like feminist and indigenous approaches to research in geography can not only further our research in human geography, but can keep strong subjectivity and equal value in different kinds of knowledge, from people, cultures and places around the world (Hay 2016, p. 85). 

3 Things I Am Confused By

1. I am still confused by concepts about Foucaldian Discourse Analysis in chapter 14. This might be too narrow of a topic to take for this blog, but the idea of discourse analysis still does not seem to make complete sense to me. I understand Gordon Waitt explains it as an “interpretive approach in geography… used to make sense of the world within particular social and temporal contexts” (Hay 2016, p. 288). This still teams like too large of a definition, or unspecific an explanation to make sense to me, or make me understand that it is in fact important and integral to the way we see the social structures we live in. 

2. The second thing I am confused by still is in that discussion about the broad topic of human geography. I know it relates to most, if not every thing in our social and physical lives, but when is it not human geography? That may seem unclear as a question, but it seems confusing to me to try and place human geography within a boundary. Every topic or research method has parameters in which it focuses, but this seems like such a broad idea that I am not sure I can wrap my head around what is and what isn’t human geography, if it actually relates to everything. 

3. The last thing that is considerably still confusing to me is the idea of universal objectivity and situated knowledges. We read about these topics in chapter 19, and I still am having a hard time understanding them individually and how they exist together. Situated knowledges is explained in the text as one of the most useful approaches to “contest universalist forms of knowledge” (Hay 2016, p. 400). This idea however, still gives me a hard time to fully understand it.

3 Things I Know About Myself as Human Geographic Researcher

1. I can’t assume that I am a human geographic researcher now, and that my road to learning, analyzing, research, reflecting, and creating is done just because this course is coming to an end. I can however, distinguish the very few things I know about myself so far, as a human geographic researcher. The first is that I know I won’t place inherent value on a specific type of research or knowledge. I mentioned it earlier briefly, but I feel that the impacts from assuming a type of knowledge or method of research is “correct” compared to another is problematic, and has the power to perpetuate age old colonial values. I know I will use the skills I have learned and will continue to learn, to provide reflection and knowledge of my own, while never discounting or taking for granted the knowledge of others. 

2. Secondly, I know I am a people person. I have known this for a while, but specific to human geographic research, I will always feel more confident and comfortable having discussion, reflection, or doing research in groups, or with others rather than alone. I found that although it was a lot of fun too, this blog post forum made this class a lot more enjoyable and gave me an environment to discuss and reflect with others! This comment goes along with now knowing the power of critical reflexivity in research and discussions, and to not discount the value of discussion with peer researchers, interviewees, or during the research process. 

3. The final thing I have learned about myself as a human geographic researcher is my interest in qualitative methods of human geography, over quantitative ones. Although I understand the importance of having both, I much prefer the use and methods in qualitative research rather than quantitative. This ties into my interest in group work and working with people, instead of numbers. Asking questions, making inquiries, participants in research, and listening to the stories of people (Hay 2016, p. 117-120) is what I find most interesting and appealing about this type of research method.                                                                                                                                                              

3 Things I Need To Spend Time On 

1. Having expressed my interest for qualitative methods of human geographic research, I need to start focusing and learning more about quantitative methods. I think its important to have a wholistic view and understanding of human geography, and I can’t do that if I isolate myself from an entire side of geographic research. I understand that this textbook is aimed directly at qualitative methods, however, there are lessons from quantitative research that can be used in qualitative research as well. Organizing, analyzing, coding, and surveys all can be used (as seen in chapter 18) as a means of communicating and interpreting qualitative research (Hay 2016, p. 373). Yet, these are different skills than interviewing, listening, or reflecting on the very typical qualitative methods of research. I need to spend time on the things that don’t come to me as easily, or interest me as much, to give myself a general confidence in human geographic research. 

2. The second area of human geography I need to more fully appreciate and understand is the value in historical perspectives and accounts and research. I find myself interested in human geographic research now, and interested in the future of social structures and individuals. Historical geography and reflecting on the past seemed boring or unproductive to me. I discredited the research that can be done contemporarily, based on the history of social identities, and not just solely focusing on the research that has yet to be done or discovered. This specific need relates to chapter 11, when Roche discusses historical research and “archival sources” (Hay 2016, p. 226). Michael Roche even discusses interest he has had in the past “30 years of being a historical geographer (Hay 2016, p. 225). There is something here I have yet to find interest in, but again, in order to further my skills and my full research potential, this is a crucial part of human geography I need to spend more time on.

3. Lastly, I find myself rushing to get answers or skipping ahead to find the ultimate “research findings” when I am reading, or even trying to do research of my own. I need to work on my patience as a researcher, and not be so set on finding a single concluding answer in research. Instead, I need to assume that the process of research and analysis is the answer, and that the answers will appear sometimes in the wait or in the depths of research. Finding definitive answers is exciting, but especially in a field as broad and open as human geography, I need to build my ability to reflect on and analyze answers that come from the research process. 

I hope this small amount of information has given you all a glimpse into my perceptions of the course, and my own learning along with it. I truly did not know the importance of human geography, qualitative research, or its actual application in the real world. I have really enjoyed being a part of this class and sharing blogs with one another every week! I hope you all have had a similarly educational, interesting, and engaging semester in this blog forum. All the best to everyone this summer!

References 

Hay, I. (2016). Qualitative Research Methods in Human Geography. Fourth ed., Oxford.

Hooykaas, A. (2021). https://courselink.uoguelph.ca/d2l/le/content/668082/viewContent/2730478/View

[aggresivelyfriendly]

Hi! I know I have other unfinished fic, but I’ve actually been writing a bit, and you can blame @the-well-rested-one! I have five chapters queued up and outline for several more, that’s a good sign! Please comment if you read, or reblog! Thank you to @nikibi6 and @emulateharry for the looksie!

The One Where Harry Styles Sneezed On Me

Day One

There's only three people out on the pavement ahead of her, and a part of Elise is tempted to tip toe because she watches too many movies.

The streets of London are quieter than Elise has seen them since she moved here. She'd basically never left her university classes and not been shoulder to shoulder with wall to wall people. Her classes were over at rush hour and there were a lot of people in London at any time of day. Had you asked her before the move, she would have said she liked big crowds. But now, the tube sometimes gave her anxiety, a brand new thing, because it was so packed.

Today, well London was like a ghost town, like the film where she'd fallen in love with the city and decided she would study abroad there. It was an odd one, but that sounded like her.

28 Days Later was a weird inspiration, but maybe because London was empty in the movie, she was able to see things about it better. It was also why she felt like she should be extra quiet on the nearly deserted streets, this was the closest approximation to her favorite movie scenes she'd probably ever see in one of the biggest cities in the world. Elise had never been to a big city, not really, the largest was maybe Phoenix. But it didn't really feel that much bigger than Tucson, where she grew up, or maybe it had just grown before her eyes so she hadn't noticed.

London was a proper big city as her roommate told her, and Elise hadn't made it for a semester abroad. She'd wound up here for her post graduate work, she couldn't afford it during undergrad. The living expenses, turns out, were too expensive, but she'd found a way later, because there was a will, a dream.

Her will for today had been to find her way after class to the next public green space on her list. She'd done Kensington Gardens, Hyde Park, and Regent's Park. She went after class when she could, if there was sunlight to catch. Today was so pretty, she had decided to go even if it meant catching the tube by herself at night. And then she had stepped out into a London eerily like the one from the movie that had first infatuated her. There were people on the street though, and they didn't look like the walking dead, just the walking afraid. Those who had braved the streets wore masks. One lady had gardening gloves on. Elise wasn't sure if she was underreacting or everybody else was over the top. She hadn't really thought about it, mostly because she was under 80, and well, honestly, maybe she did feel a little bit of the invincibility youth brings.

Apparently lots of Londoners didn't feel the same way. Including those who ran her Uni. She arrived with her notebooks and excited for her day plans, resolute, to find a sign on an easel in the entryway.

"Classes Cancelled today. Online classes will resume tomorrow. All formats will be conducted via Portal for three weeks, or until further notice."

Well, shit. Had they thought to send an email? It may have saved her the trip.

Elise looked at the 100,000 emails in her gmail and discovered they had indeed emailed her. This was why she avoided online courses, she was much better, learned better, in person. Also, she was abysmal at keeping up with things via email. The next few weeks would be a trial.

She'd have to figure it out, and she knew herself; A schedule was necessary, she'd write one down, on paper, to order her life while she had to finish these courses online. But that seemed to be her only coursework for this day.

That was a bright side. She took it as a silver lining, she could head to the old London Heath right away. She considered walking, plotted out her path and realized that it was a long, long way, so long it would steal all of her energy to explore.

The tube was really ghostly, like the ghost town they visited once, Calico or something?

Regardless, she was surprised she wasn't more excited. It was just like 28 Days Later. Well not really, no bloodthirsty, spattered lurchers, but it felt eerie. Like it had the first time she watched it, before she got totally immune to the plot and could only see the sights. She was thankful when a few people got on her carriage, though they sat as far from each other as the spacing allowed. She quickly looked up more information on her phone and estimated how far away the people should be, they were all separated by much more than that.

By the time she got to her destination, she'd normally be just getting out of her first class, and Elise's stomach reminded her that this was meal time. She really was married to a schedule, or at least her biology was. She thought a picnic would be lovely, so she looked up a market and found a Whole Foods nearby. She would splash out for her lunch it looked like, could be worse, could be Waitrose, and must be cheaper than a cafe, surely.

London was pricey. Which she'd known intellectually and was now experiencing literally everyday. As such, Elsie was kinda thinking she needed a job. Was she allowed to work? Maybe on campus. She'd have to ask the question to somebody who knew; she was running through her reserves.

Elise kinda sighed at herself as she walked into Whole Foods. Maybe this was not the best idea. But it was bright and cheery inside and smelled like green juice and roasted vegetables. Her stomach growled and she decided the worst that could happen was she would wind up eating cup o' noodles and have to pack a lunch a lot towards the end of semester before her next stipend.

Elsie shrugged and sang along a little to the song playing overhead. She felt like she rarely heard One Direction here, she heard it played out more in public in the US, and wondered if that was due to public exhaustion. She understood that it had been next level crazy here. Maybe it was just time? They'd been her favorite when she was in early high school. She had decided she was gonna marry Liam in eighth grade. That opinion changed as they all aged. She got too cool for them, and well, some of them grew up nicely. "Just how fast the night changes." She tried to harmonize along. The song also meant she wasn't hurrying she was, however, wandering.

Fruit, she should grab some fruits, that was always a good place to start.

How she wound up by the hot bar she didn't know, but she grabbed a bit of roast chicken and realized the layout was backwards to the one she was used to in Tucson. The metal spoon clanked as she got some potatoes that looked deliciously crunchy and had little burned ridges like she loved. She should have some vegetables. Carrots didn't count, real green things were needed. Asparagus counted. She was looking at the cut fruit, but then thought about her budget concerns and headed over to the produce section.

It was a little emptier than what she assumed was normal, a few ladies and a tall, lanky man in a hoodie and hat were the only people about. He was broad from the back, but had a furtive set to his shoulder that made him smaller. He was also standing exactly where she wanted to be. In front of the bananas, her favorite of the economical fruits. The best bunches clustered where he didn't seem to be doing anything but loitering.

Elise's belly growled, the aroma of her roasted chicken wafted up. She'd give it another minute and if he hadn't moved, she'd try to politely shoulder her way around him, 6 feet or not.

She gave it two minutes. By the end her converse was audible tapping. He still hadn't moved at all. So help her, if he was on his phone! It was time for action. She came up to about his shoulder, and he did not seem to notice there was 5 feet of impatience at his elbow, at least he certainly didn't move. When Elise realized he was on his phone, her patience snapped. That had to break some kind of grocery store etiquette. Was there grocery store etiquette? Certainly, it would extend to standing so people couldn't access foods when you were fucking around on your phone.

She reached past him, "sorry, excuse my reach." she hoped he could hear just how not sorry she was. Elise was good at passive-aggression.

She heard his breathing change and was ready to tell him he had just been blocking the bananas for three minutes, and she knew she wasnt being socially distant, but he was being rude, when he turned towards her. He was being rude, especially by English standards and she would tell him so, even if she wasn't sure if he was exactly impolite, accusing an Englishman of that was very effective.

She realized two things when he looked at her.

One- he was not some stranger- he was HARRY. FUCKING.STYLES!

And two- as his spit splattered all over her face, he wasn't about to call her rude, his gasp had been the beginning of a sneeze.

😷😷😷😷😷

The last hour had been an absolute blur. She had just sat down to eat. And though her 16 year old self would consider this an upgrade, her 23 year old self was really sad the heath was not the site of her lunch, even if it had been switched out for her teenage dream.

Because Harry Styles had started his litany of apologies with a "fuck!" Then a spilling ramble. "I'm so sorry, dammit, I knew I should have just sent somebody. Dammit, Jesus fuck, now you will have to be quarantined too." His hands were fumbling with the wet wipes and she could smell the disinfectant on them. She stopped him short before he was wiping that shit on her face and was redirecting his hand while he was still talking about how they could just both be holed up in his house. It distracted from the fact he was rubbing spittle off her shirt very close to her nipple.

"I mean, it's not huge. Damn, I kinda wish the new house was done. Then we wouldn't even have to see each other. Not that, I um, wouldn't want to see you, or like whatever, but um. We don't know each other and we'll be, like, living together for several weeks. I guess you could quarantine at your place. But I just feel better, cause it's my fault. Seems rude to possibly infect somebody due to negligence, and not like, help them through it. I just had to have my celery juice." That part was said under his breath, and he wasn't holding any juice.

She remembered the closed juice bar. The sign had read: Our fresh bars-juice, smoothie, and coffee are close due to Covid- 19 contagion worries. We apologize for any inconvenience.

Then it clicked, while she wiped his sputum from her face. That is what he was talking about. What the?

"Are you just wandering around whole foods infecting people? You have the virus?"

She realized she'd been talking really loud and attracting attention. Harry certainly realized.

He looked agitated and around to see if they had an audience, and she realized his face was a bit of a liability. That would be some headline for sure. "Harry Styles spreading coronavirus!" or some shit like that. He used to get press for existing, the memory made her soft for him.

"Let's get you checked out. And we can go back to my place and talk?" He made eye contact and she got confused for a second longer.

"What?" Elise found herself saying. She would normally never ever go home with some dude in a store. But, this dude was Harry Styles, and that made her feel simultaneously safer and also like this was a chance she had to take. She also wanted to yell at him a little.

He sighed, like she was a hard to open packet of chips. "Can you check out and meet me outside?" He looked around again and bit his lip because the women nearby were watching them. He handed her his basket and helped her transfer her things to it, "Can you grab my things too?" He didn't sound like she remembered him. But she supposed she'd not done more than listen to his albums once through after she'd grown out of her One Direction phase.

He sounded better. He was still growing up well.

"Huh?" She was not following him. He gave her that exasperated face and thinned his lips before he quickly got a hundred pound note out. "Check out and I'll meet you in my car. I'm near the front, all right?"

She barely remembered checking out. The girl had to prompt her twice, and she'd shoved the sanitizer at her when they'd both had to touch the change. She even considered keeping. Can you grab my things too, the audacity! But she handed it to him promptly and he put it away and sanitized his hands and gave her a squirt too. Chivalry in the time of Corona.

The drive had been quiet. Though she was sure there were things to do, to say, certainly. So the radio played and Harry sang along. It was a surreal moment, right out of her teenage dreams. Listening to Harry Styles sing in his expensive car. The missing piece that made it reality instead of fantasy was that she was not singing along, instead she was confused and hungry.

"Here, I'll warm up your lunch." Was the first thing he said to her as he ushered her into the square house she recognized from something on the internet years ago. It was a little cold inside and Elise fitted her sweater around her shoulders and sat at the wood grain kitchen table. Her food came to her steaming. Then a warm mug she immediately wrapped her hands around.

"You cold?" He asked while moving to a fancy looking blue screened rectangle on the wall. "I'm always cold, so I just wait until someone seems too cold to change anything."

She nodded.

"Right, so you know me?" He asked like it was taking out the garbage.

"Um," Elise took a drink. "Yeah, I was a huge One Direction fan in high school."

He smiled at that. "Ok, is that why you've gone silent? Freaking out?"

"Yeah, and also, I'm not really following. Honestly."

"Why don't you tell me a little about about what you think is going on. Then I'll fill in my side."

She took a breath. "Can I eat my lunch first?" She needed a minute, and she was beyond hungry, and annoyed. Definitely annoyed. And maybe just a touch of freaking out. Harry was her favorite for a lot longer than Liam, if she was honest.

"Oh! Yes, of course." He shook his head, "how rude of me."

That was why he felt rude? Not the bananas or irresponsible shopping trip. Elise widened her eyes at her carton before she dug in and didn't look up until the blender went.

A green smoothie, vibrant and lush, was placed at her elbow. It matched his eyes. "Here, to your health."

"Thank you." She took a sip and smiled. Her blood sugar was rising and she was already feeling considerably better, though her odd situation and figuring it out came to the forefront. "So, um, to my health hmmm?" She cheered the air.

Harry exhaled and nodded.

"To yours as well?"

"I suppose you could say that." He pulled his lip between his forefingers and she remembered that from interviews.

"You're not supposed to touch your face." She ah, ah, ahhed with a grin.

He laughed and it broke some of their tension. "I'm not. Neither are you."

Elise realized she had her chin in her hand. She slapped it lightly on the table and sat up. "Fair enough, so what am I doing here, Mr. Styles?"

He groaned lowly and she wondered what that was about. She didn't let it sidetrack her though, she'd wait out his response.

He took a big gulp of health and Elise watched the chunky residue slide down the glass.

"You've heard of Coronavirus, yes?"

She couldn't help but roll her eyes.

He chuckled, she hoped at himself, what the fuck kind of question was that?

"Right, pretty unavoidable, yeah?" He didn't need her to agree, he kept talking. "I travel a lot."

"Duh!" she interrupted.

At that he really did laugh. "So, I travel a lot, duh, and I flew on a flight where somebody tested positive. There aren't many tests yet, they're rationing them."

"Even for you?" She was surprised.

"Even for me," he sighed. "I'm just a person. Anyway, the person in question asked for a pic for his daughter—."

"Likely story."

"Perhaps, and so, we were in close proximity and we shook hands," she nodded along with the line of his narrative. "They won't test me unless I show symptoms. But quarantine was recommended."

He finished, he'd left out a part though.

"Is Whole Foods part of the quarantine radius?"

He blushed a little, and all of the reasons she'd had some of her earliest fantasies about him surfaced. "No, not as such. But I was low on bananas."

"Nobody you could pay a euro for your bunch of bananas?" She hoped for a laugh.

He squinted. "Course, but I don't like to be a bother."

She couldn't help but laugh at that. "So, in your effort to not inconvenience anyone for a couple hours, you've exposed me by sneezing in my face, rude, and kidnapping me to your house? So, now I have to quarantine too?"

"You aren't a kid. How could I nap you?" This was not a joke, but the humor of it was not escaping either of them.

"Not what that means, though I've no idea why." She shrugged.

"Young lady napped?" He tried.

"Oh god, you are sooo English. Young lady napped." She tried on his drawl.

"That was terrible!" He shook his head like he was offended.

"I thought it was pretty good?" She popped her shoulder and her own little dimple in her left cheek appeared, though it didn't pull the weight his did. He narrowed his eyes before raising up his eyebrows.

"It was alright, I suppose. We have time to perfect it."

"Why's that?" She found herself asking.

"Well, we're pretty much stuck together. How d'ya feel about two weeks at Le Hotel Styles?"

He couldn't be serious, could he?

[youllallriseintheink]

Audrey and the Dark Revival: chapter 1- First Encounters

Audrey and the Dark Revival is intended as a sequel series for Bendy and the Ink Machine. May the actual sequel come out soon and completely blow mine out of the water.

I was going for a “first chapter of a puzzle/action game” vibe for this.

Sorry for the little hiatus, I was making the plot outline for this. It will have at least five chapters.

---

Audrey took one last look at the letter in her hands.

Audrey,

This is your mother. About a year ago, your father purchased a mysterious machine, and as of now, he’s missing. What I’m about to tell you will sound crazy, but you have to believe me. The machine has the ability to create a dimension that your father is now trapped in. He is literally at the center of his own little world, and he’s continuously making it bigger. Every night before he disappeared, he would come back later, more ink-stained, and less coherent than he had the night before. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn’t. As of now, he either can’t leave, isn’t sane enough to, or doesn’t want to. The dimension is growing to the point where it can’t be contained anymore. Objects in our house are beginning to look like the ones he creates. It’s as though the dimension is leaking. One of the creatures from the dimension appeared in my room yesterday. I can’t call the police- I don’t think they’d be much help, and I’m complicit in so much that he’s done. Audrey, I need you to go in there and save him. If you don’t, I fear the dimension will spill into this world more and more. He can control the dimension. He’ll help you.

-Mom.

Half of the room Audrey stood before was her father’s old study- though the carpet and some of the fine furniture had been replaced since he’d kicked her out half a lifetime ago. The other half of it defied explanation. Its colour had completely faded to nothing but white, with black lines at the edges of objects like they’d come out of a newspaper comic strip. It was all surrounding one door- a door which when opened, revealed a simple storage closet, and which had a meter-wide pentagram in front of it.

Why had she come here? Why wasn’t she at home with her husband and daughter? Loyalty to Mr. Arch (Audrey refused to call him a ‘father’)? Sheer curiosity? She supposed it didn’t matter. Whatever the reason, she’d come across state lines for this.

Audrey rifled through her father’s chestnut desk until she found a key within an open, unmarked envelope (apparently, he hadn’t switched hiding places in nineteen years), and used it on his locked filing cabinet. Amongst the files, there was an unmarked black book- each page of which contained a pentagram and some instructions on how to activate it. Kneeling before the pentagram her father must have drawn, Audrey paged through the book until she found the closest matching pentagram. It was identical, except for a foot-wide center of its star- on the page it had been blank, but on the ground, its design was as intricate as the shrunken-down blueprint of an unknowable labyrinth.

The page contained a picture of what appeared to be a tattooed hand, a knife taped to the page, and the following instructions:

The dimensional pentagram enables one to move a dimensional portal from one place to another. In order to do so, draw the following pentagram, with the layout of desired dimension at its center. In to become a person who can operate the pentagram, cut your hand in the following pattern, and offer up your blood.

The design on the hand was in the shape of a spiral, centered on the back of one’s hand, but extending to the palm to and around the thumb.

Audrey dropped the book. Nope, she was not doing this. She strode back to the door out- but it was locked.

“Mother!” Audrey yelled. “Mother, I’m locked in here! Let me out!” She stopped. Surely she’d been loud enough that her mother would have heard. But no one came. A few hours passed, with Audrey calling for help periodically. Audrey didn’t even hear footsteps or distant voices. Audrey supposed she should have counted on her bitch of a mother to pull a trick like this. It seemed that the only way out was through.

Audrey took the knife in her right hand, and cut into her left, carving that spiral design and grunting with pain as red blood fell to the ground and flowed onto her pantlegs. Her craftsmanship was rather shoddy, but who could blame her with a flesh canvas to work on? By the time she finished, she was panting. She drew her hand over the pentagram and let the blood drop. As soon as the blood hit the pentagram, her cuts began to scar over, leaving her hand looking as though it was tattooed. 

Audrey tried the door again. It was unlocked. The second Audrey stepped through the door, it slammed hard behind her. The hallway within was still in that cartoonish style, and it was also gloomily dark. There were posters on the walls for Bendy cartoons and comics.

Oh, Hello? A greasy voice called- apparently from nowhere. It was her father’s voice- albeit a more deranged version of it. What’s a pretty girl doing in such a dangerous place all by herself? Oh, don’t answer that. I know. You’re here to come get me, aren’t you? Well, it’s a long ways off from here. Why don’t I give you a little power to help you along?

Audrey’s left hand shook, then crackled with electricity. Suddenly, her scar was glowing.

Oh, but what’s power without the opportunity to use it?

The wall at the end of the hall opened up in a swirl of black goo, and a massive blob of ink made its way through it before splitting off into several man-sized black blob abominations with arms and tortured faces. And they were coming straight for her. With a cry of panic, Audrey jerked out her arms to try and protect herself. Electric sparks flew from her left hand, arcing to one of the monsters, which fell over, melted into a puddle, and disappeared. Suddenly empowered, Audrey repeated the motion to take out the rest of them.

Very good. I think I’ll leave you be to wander a while. Oh, this will be so entertaining to watch.

“Wait, Nathan, where are you?” Audrey called out, “I’m here to come get you.”

Silence.

“Nathan!”

Still nothing.

“Father?”

Of course it wouldn’t be that easy. With that, Audrey continued on. The place mostly just seemed like a ghostly, abandoned animation studio, with the addition of spilled ink and pipes everywhere. She also found a few audio logs of her father’s employees, but nothing that brought her closer to finding or rescuing her father.

Eventually she came to the art department, sporting rows of desks with unfinished Bendy cartoons upon them and puddles of rubber ink upon the floor. A small, chimp-like creature was huddled under one of the desks, drinking a can of soup. Cautiously, from a safe distance, she knelt down to its level.

“Hey, there. Um, can I ask for directions?”

The creature stood up and came after her, babbling in gargled tones. She stood and shocked it, but to her terror, a similar creature- or a spider-like one, or a decapitated pirate-like creature- was coming out from under every desk. Audrey ran. It was clearly too many to take on. Eventually, she ended up at a dead end at the end of a hallway. She’d put a solid twenty feet between her and the butcher gang, but it wasn’t nearly enough. Frantically, she tried all the doors for an unlocked one while shocking as many of the abominations as she could with her left hand.

Then, one of the doors burst open, and a horned woman with a machete and an axe-wielding cartoon dog with a mechanical arm stepped sprang out of it. Audrey, now frozen from confusion, watched as they stabbed their way through the horde. Then, the wolf turned to her and lifted his axe to strike.

Audrey put her arms out. “I mean no harm!” she yelled quickly.

The horned woman came over to her. She appeared surprised to see Audrey. “Oh. Okay. Who are you? I’ve never seen you before. But I’ve seen someone like you. Are you a human? State your name and business.” Her voice and demeanor was gentle, aside from the fact that her machete was pointed directly at Audrey.

“My name is Audrey Arch.”

The swordswoman’s eyes grew wider. “Daughter of Nathan Arch?”

“Yes. And I’m here to rescue him.”

Allison’s eyes hardened. “Tom, take her arms. We need to take her to our base and decide what to do with her.”

In a moment, Tom was restraining her, and she was blindfolded and walking to who knew where.

“Don’t worry too much about this,” Allison said gently, “Tom and I have to take precautions like this, but if you really do mean no harm, you have nothing to fear. Honestly, it’s a hopeful sign that we’re seeing another human.”

[ace-oreos]

Way of the Hunter Ch. 1

After MANY days of writer’s block, getting distracted by our favorite dorks, and listening to Watch What Happens from Newsies on repeat, @deltaturtle26 and I are super excited to share the first chapter of a fanfic that’s been a long time in the making! 

Side note: I should not be allowed to write drama yee anywhere in the document when I don’t know what to write, nor am I permitted to write jokes or phrases that are actually foreshadowing. I am also forbidden from writing “we’ll just beat him up and see where it goes” in our outline. 

We hope you enjoy! Fair warning, it is rather long but hey, plot reasons. I only wish you could see all our ridiculous side notes and comments. I apologize in advance for the formatting; I’ll play around with it for later chapters. 

Edit: I added the prologue here like I was supposed to several weeks ago. 

The past leaves scars on all of us.

Sometimes you can’t see them. Other times they’re right there in front of your face.

But they are there regardless.

Some are meant to be seen; they tell the galaxy that you lived and you were hurt, but you survived.

Others…

Well, there are others that should stay hidden.

“Why are you so stubborn, Sarge?” Tech asked, looking puzzled and mildly amused by Hunter’s continued struggles. Even Crosshair hid a smile at the sight. 

“‘M not stubborn,” Hunter insisted, gritting his teeth and trying vainly to wrench his arm out of Wrecker’s grip. “Just - trying - to win.”

“No chance,” Wrecker taunted.

Hunter was convinced that he was going to be minus one arm by the end of this, but it was a necessary sacrifice. Really. He hadn’t spent the last six years telling his squad that he was entirely capable of beating Wrecker just to give up now. 

Still, after five minutes with no progress, he was reconsidering his decision to challenge Wrecker in the first place. He strained to keep his brother from forcing his arm down; Wrecker, on the other hand, didn’t look inconvenienced in the slightest. Tech and Crosshair seemed to be losing interest, but Hunter was too far in. He would have bragging rights, at least.

“Y’know, I need this arm,” he grunted a moment later. “I know Wookies pull their enemies’ arms off, but can you leave mine where it’s supposed to be?”

Wrecker just grinned and raised his own arm. Hunter yelped, trying to find purchase in the grass, but he was still lifted bodily, legs working helplessly in the air. “Put me down!” 

“Do you give up?” 

“No!”

“Then no can do, Sarge,” Wrecker said, plainly enjoying himself. 

“How old are you?” Crosshair muttered, rolling his eyes. He clearly had no patience for his brothers’ antics. “We’re on a mission, for fierfek’s sake.” 

“We’re not completing an objective right now, though,” Tech reasoned as Hunter let out every curse he knew and some he invented on the spot. “Besides, it’s not hurting anything.”

“It’s hurting my arm --” 

“You brought this on yourself,” Crosshair informed him, unamused.

“Hey, pulling someone off the ground is cheating!” 

“Who cheats at arm wrestling?” 

“Wrecker does, apparently,” Tech observed.

“You never said there were rules,” Wrecker argued.

“Okay, so it’s an unspoken rule.”

“Common sense,” Tech put in helpfully. 

“Hunter, you’re the only one who actually invests any energy whatsoever into these things,” Crosshair said in exasperation. 

Hunter didn’t bother to respond. His arm was likely halfway out of its socket by now, and he was seriously thinking of a dislocated shoulder. Resigned to the merciless teasing he’d no doubt have to endure, he grumbled, “Fine. I give up.”

Wrecker crowed triumphantly and dumped him to the ground unceremoniously. Hunter spat out a mouthful of grass and glared at his squad. Crosshair, for all he’d feigned indifference, was smirking at the sergeant. Tech stifled a laugh. 

“If you say one word --” Hunter started warningly. 

“Don’t need to,” Crosshair said drily. “The evidence is right in front of us.” 

“Fifth time in a row, Sarge!” Wrecker declared, giving Hunter a friendly nudge that nearly knocked him off his feet again. “You’ve got a good streak going.”

Hunter made a face at him and turned to Tech, trying to salvage what was left of his dignity. “Have you taken a look at that city yet?” 

Tech managed to keep a straight face when he responded, “Just getting a sense of the layout now, Sarge. Looks like there’s a number of ways to get in with a small team without the Techno Union noticing. We won’t be able to get in too close with the Marauder, though.”

Hunter shrugged. “Shouldn’t be a problem. It’ll be easier without the ship anyways.”

“As long as we don’t blow our cover again,” Crosshair said pointedly. 

Wrecker scowled at the sniper. “That wasn’t my fault.”

“I never said which incident I was talking about…”

Hunter rolled his eyes. “On that note, I’m going to stretch my legs for a bit.” He fixed Tech with a stern look. “If they kill each other, you’ll catch it later.” 

Tech just grinned. “You got it, Sarge.” 

***

Tech decided to check on his brothers, and found Crosshair fiddling with some ammunition. Of course, he was curious, and stepped closer to get a better look.

“Whatcha got there, Crosshair?”

The sniper smiled and showed him an ammo clip. “Just something I picked up on our last shopping run.”

Tech stared at it for a bit, puzzled as to why his older brother seemed to make such a deal over extra ammo. Granted, he was the team’s sniper, so it really wasn’t any surprise that he enjoyed sniping or took good care of his weapon—one that had helped them survive and accomplish missions and other tasks on various occasions—but this particular thing was odd.

“You restocked your ammo supply?”

“These are no ordinary rounds, Tech. I believe these will help us tremendously in the future.”

Tech leaned forward, curiosity piqued and eager to learn more. “Really? How so? How are they different?”

Crosshair turned the clip around in his hand then tossed it to him. “They pack far more of a punch than most other ones. The next time we deal with tougher opponents, like supers or small vehicles, dealing with them will be a breeze.”

“Fascinating!” Tech exclaimed, examining the clip in his hand. “How much were they?”

The sniper looked away and remained silent.

“Crosshair,” Tech said slowly, “if I check our balance and find you’ve spent most of our credits -”

“I didn’t!”

Wrecker chuckled awkwardly. “Actually, I think I did.”

The short clone let out a squeak then hastily replaced his helmet in absolute irritation before handing the clip back to the sniper and walking away.

Hunter still hadn’t returned, but Tech wasn’t worried. It wouldn’t be the first time his brother needed space before the real madness broke loose. 

True to his word, Tech continued to keep an eye on Crosshair and Wrecker. There was no way of knowing what might happen when they were left to their own devices. The Techno Union was completely unaware of their presence, and Tech preferred to keep it that way. 

He sat down beside Wrecker, keen to look at the Techno Union’s latest movements. They still claimed neutrality, but the latest intel indicated a worrying streak of Separatist leanings. 

Wrecker took one look at Tech’s datapad and yawned pointedly. Without bothering to glance up, Tech said, “If you’re not interested, go check the perimeter.”

“Droids aren’t stealthy,” Wrecker grumbled, but he pushed himself to his feet. Before he took more than a few steps, however, Hunter reappeared from the trees. 

“Don’t bother,” he called. “It’s all quiet.” He gave Crosshair a friendly nudge with his elbow as he strode past and winked at Tech. “You can save those rounds for later, Cross.” 

Crosshair merely rolled his eyes with a huff. Tech hid a smile and returned his attention to Hunter. “We’re all set to infiltrate the city, Sarge.”

“Good,” the sergeant replied. He settled next to Wrecker. “Get some sleep. I want to take the city tomorrow.”

“I’ll take first watch,” Tech offered. 

After a few minutes, he recognized Crosshair’s light steps approaching. His brother sat beside him without a word. Wrecker joined them soon after.

Tech shook his head. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” 

Wrecker smiled sheepishly. Crosshair just shrugged and said, “Yeah, well - ”

He broke off at the insistent beeping of Tech’s comm. Puzzled - Hunter was dozing just a few feet away - Tech exchanged a look with Crosshair and activated it. 

 “Execute Order 66.”

Upon hearing those words, he suddenly felt… different. But a good different.

He blinked, then turned to face their sergeant, eyes narrowing. He knew what he had to do.

 “It will be done, my lord.”

 Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Someone’s comlink was chirping. 

Order 66. 

Hunter was clueless as to what that was. Why would they be given an order they didn’t know? Tech acknowledged it, though; perhaps he knew.

Shaking his head to clear it, Hunter approached his brother. “Hey, Tech, do you know what this order means?”

“Good soldiers follow orders.”

[princepestilence]

NYR: January in review.

Post-January horoscope: “great things are done by a series of small things brought together.”

What an exhausting first month of the year. I feel like things just haven’t stopped, and I’m genuinely hoping there will be a little reprieve this month. But we’ll see. Here are some things I’ve done: 

moved in! We live in a gorgeous apartment now! There’s still more to do, but this is a huge step and I’m thrilled. It’s still not feeling quite like home, but once we’ve got the last furniture in, and the books set up, and the art on the walls, I think it’ll be perfect. 

taught summer session. I finished marking everything officially yesterday and it was very draining. This session had me marking journals twice a week for the whole class, in addition to essays and the exam, and also this class was unexpectedly challenging in some ways (and expectedly challenging in others--i.e., teaching via distance online). Glad to have done it! But also glad that it’s done with now. 

read four new books. This was only because I was teaching them, but still! Books are books. In total I actually read six books this month, and I’d like to read more going forward. I’m not sure what I’ll pick up next (apart from Unseen Academicals for my thesis chapter this month). Which leads me to: 

feeling good about my thesis and chapter layout! It’s rare (at least in the last few years) for me to experience positive emotions in regard to my thesis, but I am actually feeling happy. It feels like a weight has been lifted off me once I was able to identify what about the previous chapter outline was really not sitting well with me. It also helps that I have the best supervisor in the world and she thinks I’m smart and cool. 

walked to the lighthouse a few times. It’s really wonderful living so close to the ocean. I’ve wanted to make the most of it, so I’m trying as much as possible to get that healing sea air in my lungs, like I’m a frail young man of delicate constitution from the way back years. I’ve also discovered it’s ideal podcast walking, which solves my new trouble of no longer having long, arduous train trips to use as podcast-listening time. Two birds stoned at once, as they say. 

doing the program. It’s nice to see palpable progress in this area, especially since last year felt like pushing a boulder up a hill. Even in the last two or three weeks, there’s a very clear shift in my life and it’s really great. 

saw lots of friends, being social again. It is so good to be closer to everyone again, and be able to host properly. I’m looking forward to doing a lot more of this going forward. There’s a couple of days a week that are becoming regular catch-up days, which is so nice. I love having social routines. 

watched a lot of Attenborough. Not a goal! But I have loved it all the same. I’m trying to watch everything they have to offer before the three-month trial is up, wish me luck. 

playing Planet Zoo again (and actually loving it this time). Also not officially a goal, but I’m making it one now. It’s been great to actually be able to get into the game this time and have the required mental energy and creativity to really make the most of it. I’d like to get to a point where I’m able to make some gorgeous architecture and designs, and really plot out and complete major projects. But for now, I’m having fun with my training wheels on. 

Things that didn’t happen:

no slam this year. Very unfortunate news, but the slam won’t be continuing this year. Part of why I was so excited to return to the city was to be in proximity with more local arts events, and it’s disheartening and a little scary to see how many have suffered from the funding cuts recently. I’m still hoping for good things, though. Did sign up as an official member of the writers’ association, though!

no letters. I wrote some on the first of this month, but that doesn’t count.

In February, I will: 

run another Dread game. This is high on the to-do list! I’m keen to get back into it more often. 

write more. I’ve missed it and I want to devote more of my time to this. I’ve got two projects in particular that I’d like to add to, so that’s something I’m going to focus on this month. 

send more letters! I’ve already started on this, but there’s several more people to get to. 

set up a website. I’ve been dragging my feet but I’ve got to. I need to start getting the word out, and hope something good comes my way. 

write a thesis chapter. It doesn’t have to be good, it just has to be done. 

[squiggle-dragon]

So, I've decided to also post full chapters of Faded here in addition to Ao3. So, here's the second chapter.

-

Chapter 2: "Do I know you?"

Soul cracked his eyes open, vision blurring initially as sunlight filtered in. 'Daylight…? Fuck… how long was I out for?'

He was resting on a nest of blankets in some sort of contraption, similar to a basket. While Soul was not necessarily up-to-date with the technological advances of the world, he at least managed to acquire a fair amount of knowledge.

'Plastic basket,' he decided, lightly pushing against the sides with a furry paw despite his body's protest. He started to stretch, immediately thinking better of it when pain shot through every square inch of his small form. The youkai paused, noticing a makeshift cast on his other foreleg, 'What's this…? A splint?' Soul scrutinized it, narrowing his blood-colored eyes before giving it a tentative sniff. The scent of antiseptic burned his nasal passages and he sneezed profoundly, wrinkling his nose in displeasure, 'Absolutely horrible.'

Memories of the previous night returned to the forefront of his mind and his lip curled slightly, 'They'll be six feet under the ground when I recover.' The fox drew his lips back further into a fierce snarl, digging his claws into the blanket, 'And I'll hunt down that cocky bear and turn it into a bear skin rug. No one jumps me like that when I'm-'

"Oh, you're awake!"

Soul screeched in surprise, fur standing on end and eyes wide with alarm. Raising his gaze, he spotted the source of the voice and stared at her warily. She seemed relatively young from what he could tell, as humans aged very differently than youkai. Their eyes met and Soul squinted slightly as a peculiar feeling overcame him.

‘I’ve seen those eyes before… somehow…’

The pigtailed girl knelt down next to the basket, lightly resting her arms on the edge of it and peering down at him, “I didn’t mean to startle you. Sorry about that.” The human offered a warm smile, which he felt himself relax slightly at, “You’ve been out for two days. I was really starting to worry about you, little fox. I gave you some antibiotics and-”

‘Anti-whats-is?’

“-just in case. I mean, you got beaten up by a huge bear of all things! You’re lucky I could scare it off!”

She grinned at him, and he was sure he’d blush if he wasn’t currently two feet tall and covered in fur. He wasn’t sure why, but he felt oddly embarrassed.

“You also broke your leg,” she continued, her smile fading into a look of concern. Her green eyes traveled down to the splint currently on his left foreleg and he followed her gaze, nostrils flaring slightly at remembering the scent of chemicals.

“I hope you’re comfortable,” the girl added after a small pause, hunching over slightly. “I just kinda had to use what was available. Unfortunately, that ended up being the laundry basket.”

His ears flattened against his skull and he glared up at her, growling lightly, ‘Are you serious?! Your dirty clothes were in here, weren’t they?!’

Taken aback ever so slightly by his suddenly hostile aura, his absent-minded savior frowned, “Hey, I launder my clothes daily, okay?”

‘So they WERE!’ he hissed angrily.

She narrowed her eyes and puffed out her cheeks a bit, clearly able to tell he was agitated with her, “Would you calm down? I’m quite clean! Do you actually understand me or something? Because this doesn’t seem like normal wild animal aggression to me….” He froze at her words, so she continued, “You only have to deal with me for a bit, okay? As soon as you’re healed up, I’ll release you back out so you can continue your moodiness elsewhere.”

Soul let out an audible snort, achingly rising to a seated position despite the cast. He furrowed his brows, starting to feel light headed almost immediately, 'Oh right… I haven't eaten in a few days.'

The youkai squinted slightly, feigning interest in some invisible spot on the blanket in an attempt to ignore her. There was no chance in Hell he would be accepting any more aid from this weird human. A powerful, nine-tailed kitsune at the mercy of a tiny human girl?

'Unheard of and laughable.'

In the brief moment of silence, his stomach decided to betray him and let out the most shameful growl that he was sure could be heard by the human girl in question. Soul froze, ears pinned back and expression completely mortified. ‘Fuck! No! Fuck, fuck, fu-’

“Sounds like you’re hungry,” she commented, causing him to sulk slightly. Still, he refused to look at her and remained tensed, cursing his stomach a thousand times. Hunger was such a pathetic weakness.

He started to make some noise of protest before he realized that the pigtailed girl was missing; likely finding food, no doubt. Soul growled before trying to hop out of the basket, instead throwing his body against it. The result was the laundry basket tipping over on its side, forcing him to topple forward with it. His tail obscured his vision as he growled again, painstakingly moving to where he could even make the attempt to stand up, ‘Oi! Get your ass back here! I will NOT be indebted to you! HUMAN! Don’t you DARE!’

Soul awkwardly stumbled out of the room, given the cast on his leg. His body ached and pleaded with him not to be so rash with his movements. He knew full well he should be resting, but he sure as hell was NOT about to let himself come across as some weak victim. He could take care of himself, damn it! The bandaging and doting for two days was enough.

While he had no idea of the layout of this strange place, he was easily able to find his target by following the noise. This girl didn't exactly make it difficult with all of the racket she generated - which seemed to be a talent of hers when he thought back to the incident with the bear.

The kitsune awkwardly entered the kitchen, body lowered and his large ears pricked forward as he approached. The girl in question was currently crouched in front of an open cupboard, biting the nail of her thumb in a thoughtful manner. She was examining a can clutched in her other hand, furrowing her brows in deep concentration.

Despite his impeccably stealthy entrance, the girl almost seemed like she could sense his presence. Soul froze when she looked up from the can to meet his gaze. She pursed her lips a bit before hesitantly holding up the can for him to see, "Do you eat dog food…?"

Every fiber in Soul's small body seemed to light up at the sheer audacity of her statement, wanting to yell at her for such a dumb question. The fox arched his back in an almost cat-like manner, fur ruffling as he glared at her and snarled, 'Do I look like a dog to you?!'

Despite his clearly aggressive reaction to her, she seemed mostly unaffected outside of mild irritation. Any normal person would likely be wary or even scared that the snarling fox would lunge at them. This strange girl, however, treated him more like a petulant child.

"Goodness fox, it was just a simple question," she replied with a hint of agitation before putting the dog food back into the cupboard. “Given your attitude problem, I didn’t think you would. It was just something that normal foxes tend to eat if given to them and it was on the list when I researched it.” Closing the cupboard door, she stood up and stretched her back for a moment with a grimace, “I’m a college student, so therefore quite poor. However, it would seem I need to move a little up in the price range for your more sophisticated tastes.”

“Fortunately for you,” she started after a brief pause, walking over to the stove. “I had gotten some chicken earlier to make some chicken noodle soup from scratch since I seem to be battling a small cold. I’ll give you some of the chicken and a bit of broth, if that will suit your tastes better, Your Majesty.” Ignoring the sour expression he gave her in response, the human equipped an apron and started to prepare the meal.

Soul watched her quietly as she worked, eventually deciding to lay down against one of the farther walls. When she set a pot on a nearby counter, an envelope resting along the edge drifted through the air and gently landed a short distance away from him. The fox glanced at the envelope, curiosity winning out as to what it was. With another wary glance up at her, he slowly inched his way across the floor in a rather comical fashion, given the cast on his leg.

After what seemed like an hour to him, he stretched out one paw and managed to rest it on one corner of the envelope, feeling oddly accomplished at the meager task. His long tail twitched happily, clearly easily amused at the simplest of things. Soul pulled the envelope closer to him, blood-colored irises searching out the name on it, ‘Maybe now I’ll know what the hell this crazy human’s name -- !’

‘Maka.’ The kitsune’s body went rigid as soon as he made out the girl’s name, feeling the oddest sense of foreboding. Much like her eyes, her name seemed somehow familiar.

Why did it feel like a boulder of ice was currently settling in his stomach?

While the dam didn’t break open, it was clearly overflowing and he was caught in a downward spiral. Before he could process one emotion, another broke through almost like a tidal wave - or would, but everything felt also strangely faded.

Fear… which made his recent experience with near-death pale in comparison despite the fact he knew it wasn’t but an echo of the original emotion.

A profound sadness… like something gravely important was lost. It briefly felt like his heart had been ripped out and a gaping hole was left in its place… yet he didn’t bleed. Slowly bleeding to death would have been more merciful.

And finally, a surge of anger that threatened to take over completely. The rage Soul felt almost overwhelmed the feeling of loss and his power felt on the verge of being let loose. His eyes glowed ominously, lips drawing back in a snarl as the feeling only intensified. Faint outlines of his other eight tails could be seen waving in the air behind him as his power crept up, seeming unaffected by his weakened state. At this moment, however, Soul could not care less if he transformed to his true form here in the kitchen. His mind felt blank aside from the desire to lose control - to kill.

Something needed to be destroyed…

Someone needed to be torn apart….

Somehow, the sound of the lid slamming down on the pot snapped him out of whatever confusing trance he had been in. His eyes widened in shock, trying to get his breathing under control as his body trembled in the wake of the strange event. Losing all strength, Soul collapsed onto his stomach and laid there with a distant glaze to his eyes. His brain scrambled to make sense of what it all meant, Maka’s worried voice barely registering. Even as she kneeled at his side and scooped him up, talking to him... her voice sounded so muffled.

“Tama!” another voice cried, sounding similar to the girl’s voice that was currently cradling him - yet it certainly wasn’t her. It couldn’t be, because her lips didn’t match the motions.

Just what the hell was going on?

Slowly, Soul managed to pull himself back to reality and focused his gaze on Maka’s worried expression. His hearing returned to normal to hear her muttering various things about how stupid she was to think she could take care of him properly. For whatever reason, she was in a state of blind panic over him - and he couldn’t figure out why. He’s treated her like crap this entire time, being aggressive and - as much as it pains him to admit it - ungrateful.

This crazy girl faced down a bear for him, though he was sure she would not be able to take it on should it have attacked. They would have both been dead. But this insane girl did that and he remembered being wrapped in something she had been wearing. It was warm….

And suddenly - the fact she was now battling a cold now made sense. She was sick after running out in the rain and using her main source of protection to bundle him up. Then while he was unconscious, she tended to his wounds the best that she was able. Now that he thought about it, he could faintly remember waking up briefly to see her passed out on a strange chair near his basket. It wasn’t for more than a minute or two due to being in such bad shape and feverish to boot, but she hardly looked comfortable.

She was going to share her soup with him as well, which caused another twinge of guilt. Oh, he really needed to be less of a little shit. It didn’t sound like she could really afford to have an extra mouth to feed, but here she is - offering to share.

It was at this point that Soul noticed tears starting to roll down her cheeks and he sighed, somehow feeling really uncomfortable about her crying. With a gentleness that he didn’t even realize he ever possessed, he raised a furry paw and rested it on her cheek.

‘Maka… I don’t know who you are, but the tears need to stop. For some reason, I really can’t stand to see you crying… you weird human.’

He gasped out in pain when she suddenly captured him in a borderline bone-crushing hug. The same anger from his previous interactions with her did not rise to the surface and he instead let out another sigh - possibly for air at this point. Okay, so she was worried about him.

Somehow, he could deal with that.