#but i think you get the gist of it...

[childrenofcain-if]

Wait so ur telling me that Mom got pregnant with us when she was still in college? As a person who's had many pregnancy scare before I graduated college, it mustn't have been easy for her at all 🙁 did she even want to keep us? Or did Elias convince her to do that?

your mother sat on the edge of her dorm bed, the small square of mattress barely big enough to hold her. ‘fake plastic trees’ by radiohead played from the CD player where she’d inserted the signed copy of ‘the bends’ that elias gifted her for her birthday last year.

she felt smaller than the girl who used to sit cross-legged on her childhood bed, staring at the posters she had of R.E.M. and the cranberries, tuning out the shouts downstairs.

now, though, it wasn’t shouts she tuned out but her own thoughts. they were loud and disjointed, clashing like mismatched cymbals in her head, each one sharp enough to make her wince.

her hand rested flat against her stomach. the knowledge of you being there was like holding a fragile, heavy truth in the palm of her hand. it would not be a lie to say she loved you—not yet. but it was too soon, too abstract.

it would also not be a lie to say she feared you. that was probably closer to the mark.

she was twenty years old, and for twenty years, she had walked a line. one side was her mother, all blunt edges and scarred softness, hollowed out by betrayal and depression. the other side was her father, all cruelty wrapped in a charming exterior he presented to everyone else but his own family.

she had walked the tightrope, feeling it shift beneath her with every fight, every slammed door, every time her father disappeared for days, weeks, only to return smelling of perfume that wasn’t her mother’s.

and to think it all started when her father had called her mother ruined. ruined. he said it with the kind of disdain reserved for something you’d like to throw away but can’t even be bothered to muster the energy to do so.

it was after her brother was born, and everything about her mother seemed different: softer in some places, scarred in others.

the postpartum weight clung to her body like an unwanted guest, and though her father never said it directly, he didn’t have to. his glances said enough. his hands, which used to linger on her waist, now found the armrests of his chair instead.

her mother’s descent was slow after that, like the drip of a faucet you don’t notice until it’s flooded the sink. she spent her days shuffling around the house, a glass of something amber in her hand, her white robe hanging loosely on her frame. she looked at your mother and her brother with eyes that didn’t seem to recognize them.

the crying started shortly after. not your mother’s, not yet, but the baby’s. it was shrill and loud, as most babies’ cries are.

your mother remembered watching her mother pick up the baby, her hands trembling, her voice high and thin as she pleaded for him to stop.

he didn’t stop.

her mother’s voice then got even louder.

“stop it!” she screamed, and when that didn’t work, she shook him. not gently, not in the way that you’re supposed to handle babies. her movements were rough and desperate, her arms jerking back and forth with a force that made your mother’s stomach drop.

your mother didn’t remember moving, only that suddenly she was there, her tiny hands gripping her mother’s arm, trying to pull her away from her baby brother.

“stop!” she cried, her own voice breaking now, tears streaming down her face. “you’re hurting him!”

for a moment, her mother froze, her chest heaving, her face crumpled with something that might have been regret or might have been rage. she looked at your mother like she didn’t know her, like she was seeing a stranger. then she dropped the baby back into the crib and stumbled out of the room.

your mother held her brother that night, rocking him back and forth until his cries softened into hiccups.

she didn’t sleep well for several nights after that. she couldn’t.

by the time your mother was a teenager, she had learned how to read the silence in a room.

she could tell by the way her father’s jaw tightened when he glanced at her mother that he was one argument away from leaving. she could tell by the way her mother avoided mirrors that she hated herself more than she hated her husband.

her father eventually did leave, of course. men like him always did. he didn’t pack a suitcase or make a scene; he just stopped coming home.

for a while, your mother thought that might be a relief. it wasn’t.

her mother spiraled without him. the drinking got worse, and with it came the harsh words and the slammed doors and the nights your mother spent sitting on the floor outside her mother’s room, listening to her sob into her pillow as she tried to coax this grown woman to eat something.

your mother had promised herself that she would be nothing like either of them.

she would not love the way her mother had loved, giving so much of herself away that there was nothing left but the empty shell of a woman who could barely hold a crying baby without wanting to hurt him.

she would not hurt the way her father had hurt, tearing holes in the fabric of their family until there was nothing left to stitch together.

and yet here she was, a junior at yale, staring at the old posters of her favourite bands in her dorm and feeling the exact same fear her mother must have felt.

it was like looking into a fucking mirror.

[madamemiz]

i request more kerfur and kel. it brings me nourishment.

same, have a comic

access denied/comforting presence

[darlinglute]

i think it's extremely fun to pair rook and solas together in any regard, no matter if he previously was being romanced because as clear narrative foils, having an enemies to lovers (and in tandem, bitch4bitch, hater x hater) dynamic feeds into that delicious 'whenever I see you I see myself and I hate that' and 'you are everything I hate about myself' soup.

I once saw a post with a collection of quotes that had this certain vibe, in the 'you and I are the same' (negative) way. if i had a quote to represent them it would be:

so shipping them feels very complex and interesting to think about, because, like in that one dialogue

(first of all, like c'mon) furthermore it's the cycle. rook is to solas what solas was to elgar'nan, there are several times in the game, especially the end, where they can see each other in each other. even if you dont see it in a shipping lenses (which you dont have to!) this is a juicy story.

moreover, at the end of the game if rook outwits solas by giving him the fake ritual dagger, solas not only recognizes that he was out played by 'wits alone' he also says that he's met his match. this mimics the several stories of fen'harel who uses his wits, wisdom etc to get out of a situation

(example: the story of fen'harel, andruil and anaris, solas goading them both into fighting each other so he could get out paralleling solas making rook fight the gods and in addition a thousand other enemies in order to get himself enough time to get out of the fade prison without rook getting ahead of it)

the betrayal too, i don't have much to say that hasn't been said already about the prison switcheroo, (evokes solas's betrayal of felassan yada yada) other then it's really tasty.

[miukki960]

The Next Prince episode 4 was a fantastic example of "Show Don't Tell" storytelling and how effective it can be when well executed. From the first scene to the very last, the audience was shown parallels between the main and second couples, and not once did the writers feel the need to baby the audience and have a character/narration spoon feed the point of what we were being shown.

It began with the dance sequence, when we are shown multiple shots of the characters dancing with their designated heteronormative, socially acceptable (class wise) partners. Every shot deliberately shows each boy give multiple longing looks at their love interest in the fleeting moments they can see eachother as they spin on the dance floor. And I don't know about everyone else, but I got goosebumps at the sheer amount of emotion on all their faces. And then Khanin, who was raised in London without the stark class distinctions of royalty, decides to act on his feelings and dance with Charan.

We immediately see the shock on everyone's faces, for a prince has crossed class lines and is dancing with someone significantly lower in rank. And in the back we see Ramil and Paytai, and we know and they know that they could never do that, could never have that.

Later, when Khanin and Ramil are alone on the cliffside, we are again forced to compare their characters. As they talk about Khanin's mom, about how they share blood, Khanin expresses sympathy about Ramil's upbringing. And it serves to force the audience to fully reflect on the differences between the two. Khanin got to have a loving father and the freedom to love and live how he pleases, regardless of gender or class. While Ramil lived under his strict father, constantly being reminded of his class and status and responsibilities.

These two scenes I mentioned, plus nearly every other scene in this episode, constantly remind the audience of the differences between Khanin and Ramil, while also subtly telling us that they are supposed to be the same in the eyes of the society they live in. They are both princes, heirs, meant to be worshiped and doted upon by their people. And as we see Khanin basically say "fuck that noise" over and over again without regard to the consequences, it makes the final parallel between Khanin and Ramil hit so much harder.

Because when Ramil is caught for messing with Khanin, and Rachata violently punishes Paytai, everyone is reminded of what's really at stake here. And it makes you truly understand why Charan acts the way he does eventhough the scene wasn't technically about him.

[tim-per-tantrum]

What's my favorite pastime you ask? Absorbing the plot of a show I've never watched via fanfiction osmosis. You think I've watched that show? Wrong bitch.

I read a convoluted fanfic, looking up characters as I went and then binge read half of AO3 and determined the plot based on what stayed consistent.

I will join every fandom and not ever interact with the source material and nobody can stop me

[cosmicaces]

something something rody has a crush on deku and is scared that it'll affect their friendship if he finds out

[nartml]

"This ship makes no sense—"

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. It doesn't have to make sense. It's all vibes here

[seventeenpins]

ok but have we talked about transmasc!joel?

transmasc!joel, who found out he was pregnant with sarah, way too young and scared absolutely shitless

transmasc!joel, whose boyfriend left him when he came out, his baby girl not even a year old

transmasc!joel, whose baby brother may be an idiot, but that kid loves him and always has, and he sure as hell won't hear a bad word about his big bro

transmasc!joel, who had always been a tomboy growing up, navigating being a whole ass adult with a fully developed brain, finding comfort in his gender identity while doing everything he can not to let the scars of his adolescence affect sarah, letting her flourish however she will

transmasc!joel, who gives sarah the BIGGEST hug (and tries not to let her see the tear in his eye) when she casually mentions starting a GSA at her school

transmasc!joel, who's the heartthrob of the cul-de-sac, but surprisingly private when it comes to his dating life. but from the few bored housewives that he's had encounters with all agree, he sure knows how to get the job done (whether it's the one he's hired for or not)

transmasc!joel, who sees a whole lot of himself in his adopted kid, and if ever Ellie decides she wants to try out a different name or pronouns, he'll be right behind his kid in a way no one but tommy was for him

[cosmickoshi]

The amount of people who genuinely believe that Hinata and Hoshiumi hate each other is so baffling to me because Hoshiumi literally says that he and Hinata will take on the whole world together.

Of course, this is not the only line that debunks the claim that their relationship is built on some degree of genuine animosity, but... this panel in particular sums up exactly what type of dynamic these two have. No, they don't hate each other or see each other as threats to their way to the top. The Kamomedai and Karasuno match entails Hoshiumi in particular realising that just because he and Hinata are both short players in a sport where being short is considered disadvantageous, does not mean that they're the same or that they have similar playing styles. Additionally, when Hinata finally embraces his role as "The Greatest Decoy" (thereby embracing his own distinct playing style), Hoshiumi acknowledges that the existence of one style does not negate the presence of another.

There's enough room on the court for both he and Hinata!!! There's enough room on the court for both of their playing styles to flourish!!! Hoshiumi doesn't really consider Hinata a rival because he isn't a hurdle he must overcome on his way to the top!!! They'll make it to the top together!!! They'll take on the whole world together!!! They'll continue to defy those odds alongside each other because there's enough space at the top for both "The Little Giant" and "The Greatest Decoy"!!!

[butterysalt]

Ahhh thoughts about Laios Touden who would love you regardless of who you were. Your species, your race, your gender, your sexuality, none of those things matter in his eyes. Because to him, what makes you so wonderful and easy to love is that you’re simply just you. And there’s no other combination like you.

I get especially sappy thinking about it if you’re a tallman, too. At first, it seems like Laios couldn’t care less about humans. He always talks about how boring he finds his own race in comparison to others but it’s all heavily influenced by his own experiences growing up and being ostracized and bullied by those around him.

But just think about what it’s like when he meets you, another tallman. Yes, you’re human, but when he realizes that you won’t treat him differently for the way he is, he sees you as so much more than that. So what if you’re a tallman? A little thing like that doesn’t matter to him.

It’s not just that you’re “different from other tallmen”… it’s because you’re you. And he’s him.

Nothing more than that.

In an odd unlikely twist of fate, it seems that this time, the mundanity of it all is what completely captured Laios’s heart.

Just… you.

[harbingersecho]

RVB OC Week Day 1; Introduction AGENT ARIZONA _ "Guess you got me, Counselor. I peaked a decade ago and now I'm wasting my time running a daycare for miserable 20-somethings who're gonna get killed, crippled, or institutionalized in a year. [...] I've heard. But I'm forty-two, not twenty-two, and I don't need to be sold on a daydream. So... What, exactly, do you have to offer me?"

anyway, here's a more in-depth look at Ari for the rvb oc week ft. an old stuff from 2023 that I used for her on artfight and some new outfit/armor things for him. random thoughts/rambles + info under the cut for those interested --

Ari was born around 46-47 years before Blood Gulch and she was with Project Freelancer for around three years until it fell apart - originally he died in the MOI crash, but since Temple later on apparently 'imprisoned' her in the living armor room (and then THAT got retconned last year), I've kept his alive status more vague, Schödinger's cat style lol. (Timeline taken from the rvb guide book)

Anyway, small facts about him I guess; she was made Major/Battalion XO in her early thirties, she has a sister and 3 nieces/nephews that he sees once in a while, he's an inconsistent smoker, and she has a more southern(? if that's what it'd be called, I'm not American and it's not really like that Texan type so...) accent that she hides for several reasons. Also one of the few poor souls who finds Wyoming's knock knock jokes funny even if he pretends otherwise ...

Originally she was a LCDR but idk if PFL has navicom freelancers + tbh I based that position off of Mass Effect lol, so now he's an eq rank of O-4 but in the Marine Corps which I think PFL falls mostly under? Idk man. I think the background storyline still works tho so it's fine

In Project Freelancer, as one of the older and more experienced agents, he was often working as a team leader or a strategist of sorts which also aligns with her previous position - though now he's actually much more involved in the ops which she likes. His skillset is somewhat crowd control-esque (which includes tracking obv), combined with eliminating targets. (I have like a "guide" on how she should be played if he was in a hero shooter/moba/whatever but this is waaay too long already, you get the concept)

The armor design (halo5 ver) is largery taken from the Freelancer presumed to be Arizona in Battlescars - a Tracer helmet with an Achilles armor. Since rvb doesn't exactly follow Halo lore, I'm imagining this to mean it's largely "functions" as a Tracer armor, i.e. tactical and tracking focused, though maybe she was considered for Omega before Tex got him (since Achilles apparently comes with an aggressive AI in Halo lore but PFL only had Alpha + the fragments and Ari never received an AI). As a Major/XO, she wore the Halo Reach Commando helmet

I didn't draw them here but I do also have other 'versions' for her armor dependant on the game (like 'realistically' he couldn't wear this armor in Halo 3 etc) but idk if it's like. That important or whatever and I'm not like an expert on Halo armor lol (tho if you have opinions on if the H3 helmet should be Security, 'basic' or ODST etc or if you have info/ideas abt Halo armor in RVB in general do LMK <3)

[revvethasmythh]

you know, i think sam does often just throw out chaotic comments he thought up on the fly while he's playing, especially when he's revisiting veth in her post-canon appearances, but i also think sam is very much the kind of player to roll with what he says and make concrete character beats out of them afterward. he did this during the main campaign with veth's fear of water--that was just a bit played for jokes initially that he decided had some meat to it and asked to incorporate it into her backstory, which he did very well and to great effect. so i think when he says something lowkey insane in the post-canon oneshots etc., i always have that in mind. like yeah, there's a high likelihood that he just thought this insane thing up in the moment with no pre-planning, but it also does not mean that it can't be a significant thing he may focus on in the future. absolute crap shot with this guy (affectionate). leaves a lot of character possibilities open, though

[everoutoftouch]

[grandcovenant]

who's pulling the strings of the puppet king?

[dennisboobs]

i love seeing based reddit takes so much, like i disagree with the Why for a lot of this, but together these two are closer than half of this fandom on twitter and tumblr imo

>it's not about him being narcissistic and getting an ego boost, although i do think a big part of why he feels he needs to be desirable is because relationships have always been shallow and transactional to him; he's The Looks, and he needs to be able to be useful to the gang, needs to be able to get any woman he wants. but when it comes to pursuing women, it's about Taking BACK Power he lost a long time ago, echoing his abuse, and doing to women as was done to him (as charlie correctly identifies in the PTSDee script).

>i don't think dennis uses mac for sex, i don't think they've actually had sex and i don't think dennis wants to. i think the reply is more correct by saying it's "romantic", but the word they're looking for is queerplatonic. ~i sleep with women but i'm emotionally involved with mac~. dennis can't be certain that he's Safe with mac in the same way he believes he can with the young women he manipulates; he ensures he has the upper hand with a power dynamic he introduces specifically to remain in control (they don't know anything about him, they are in a scenario that's been meticulously planned out by dennis) but mac has demonstrated he doesn't respect dennis' boundaries, and he also has the means to overpower him by force, both physically and psychologically.

>dennis makes it so that he is physically unable to have sex with jackie denardo in his fantasy, which consists of himself having a romantic relationship with someone who expects nothing of him, yet still takes care of him. he says he's in love with her, and she immediately gets into a horrible accident. and his fantasy is Having Huge Boobs. not having Her. it's the boobs. just the boobs. and when the boobs go, she goes. 🥚🏳️‍⚧️ it's not attraction, it's gender envy.

[poorlydrawnandroids]

…

Unfortunately they did not get burgers for Hank, but Connor at least learned a valuable lesson. I guess Nines suffers from Amelia Bedelia Syndrome.

———

Hi guys, this is actually a comic I drew and basically finished 11 months ago. And it’s been just about then since I’ve last really opened my iPad and did any drawing. There’s a ton of half-completed works on there and they’re pretty cute, so I’ll try to post them as I get the motivation. My therapist says posting to this blog will probably improve my mental health and he’s right but >:3c

So yeah! Let’s see what I can toss out this year, wooo!!