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pestilentbrood · 10 months

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VERY long Ramble incoming

honestly now that I'm looking at the auraboa lore situation, I'm just disappointed. There was such POTENTIAL in the idea of the Loop and the horror of a new generation inexplicably being disconnected from it, forcing the newly hatched children into a world totally separate from that perceived by their parents (I mean, hell, they perceive TIME differently!).... but then the writer(s?) just fell ass backwards into Icky Tropes.

I feel like I can see what the idea was, especially with the recent alterations to the Encyclopedia entry... It seems like staff fundamentally understands the true Horror potential here, but... Instead, through the short story, they proposed it through the lens of a condescending outsider character, turning the fears of the older generation into something trivial. And also weirdly demeaning the Auroboa's situation by portraying them as overreacting.

Why... why would you do that? Like, from a storytelling perspective? What's gained from that? Why not embrace the true horror and even Emotional significance of that disruption? Why instead go for "ohh we NEED outsider help we NEED to be saved because we are so helpless and it is so Silly that we, creatures who have never experienced such things, do not know what sleep is"????

And if they WANTED to have a condescending outsider, I feel like they COULD have done that, but it would have to have that character realize the horror at some point. And make it obvious that their attitude towards distressed parents and children facing Eldritch Shit and the Sudden Deconstruction of it was not cool!

(or at the very least be a bit more...idk. Consistent with said outsider character? Juniper just goes from "omg I am so honored that the fascinating creatures of the behemoth have chosen me to speak to" to "oh their wasting my time because they don't know what sleep is. I'd rather be sleeping!! 🙄" like girl... c'mon now. Why are we trivializing it like this. Do you want me as the reader to be invested in their plight or not.)

I mean come on. They're beings connected through one networked hivemind-like system, yet each still maintains a silver of individuality that allows them to move freely throughout the Behemoth that they care for. And they've got an eldritch understanding of time that no other dragon could understand. They're seeing the future, past, and present unfold simultaneously. They're witnessing the birth and death of the world at the same time, and have no way to communicate it to other dragons. The best they can do is maintain their home, and even then, they see its roots spread and decay all at once.

And then the newest generation is suddenly disconnected. An inherent link between parent and child and all dragons in-between, that has existed since the creation of their species, is just suddenly GONE for the newest births. With NO explanation for it. The children have no easy way of communicating with their parents. The children are experiencing time in a way that was not meant for their species. They've forcefully been shoved into a circadian rhythm that they are Not! Built for!

The only way a parent could communicate properly with their child would be when the latter is sleeping, something that is also completely foreign to this species. It would be terrifying for all involved!!!

They are literally experiencing eldritch horror from the perspective of the eldritch being forced into the mortal.

Like why WOULDN'T there be panic!!! And why would that panic be trivialized! Why are we only shown the perspective of an outsider who looks at this situation and goes "Oh the silly tree beasts are being so silly over nothing, it's no big deal!"

That and the way the auraboas talk to outsiders. Like. There was such potential there. Real opportunity to explore how ancient, time-bending beings would communicate to someone who couldn't even BEGIN to understand the intricacies of it.

Instead we got what feels more like baby talk (even described as though they were hatchlings enunciating their first words, which... I dunno man, maybe we don't want to compare them to children like That) and less like... Beings that experience all of time at once. I mean, the hatchlings and the adults speak the exact same way, and that doesn't make any sense given the literal time barrier going on.

I totally get why people thought there was just a language barrier and that auraboas had their own language, thus causing the disjointed speak, and not that it was because They Do Not Experience Time Like We Do. And I feel it would've been far easier to get it across by just... I dunno. Do anything else?? I saw someone on here suggest they speak in the "wrong" tenses, or using multiple tenses in the same sentence, which I think would've been far more clear.

Like, as opposed to "saplings wilt! saplings silent!" just "the saplings will wilt in silence, they've wilted in silence, they are wilting silently." Said all at once like all things are true simultaneously. And if we're going for hivemind, have each auraboa speak in a different tense, all at the same time, and have them switch it up every time. Have our outsider get confused and be like "which is it? are they wilting now, or have they already wilted?" and the cluster of auraboas respond in a cacophony of yes's, no's, and maybe's all at once.

Would've probably gotten across the "alien" vibe they were supposedly going for far better than wide-eyed desperation for an outsider's guidance conveyed through disjointed, in-world described as baby speech.

And also maybe would've had less accidental connotations. Because as it stands, I completely see why people have made the connections to the real world where they have. This doesn't read like eldritch timey-wimey intrigue, or even a respectful look at how younger generations can become detached from their families' cultures over time and the struggles that come with it. It reads like a culture being perceived by an ignorant outsider who (despite supposedly respecting these dragons) scoffs and rolls their eyes because the tree beasts with their funny words are being silly again, and that Hey, isn't it actually a great thing that the children are fundamentally different in all manners now? Because now they can join the rest of us in the "real world."

Yknow. Ick.

(I Personally think it would've been better to have the perspective be one of the Auraboas themselves, especially one of the children, to really understand what was going on here. Give us the full brunt of the mind of a creature experiencing all of time interwoven as one shape. The waters fall and the oceans crash with waves. They've now fallen to drought. The ocean has yet to be born. Caves have been carved out through the waters' currents. And when I break from this timeline, I open my eyes to see a child, the child not yet born, the child born now, the child born yesterday. Why can't I hear it? Why couldn't I hear it? Why won't I ever hear it?)

I dunno. People more qualified than me to speak on this matter have already torn the lore apart, I'm just... dropping my own two cents. Potential got weirdly squandered and we ended up instead with unfortunate implications and tropes that could be connected a liiiittle too awkwardly to irl situations.

*Also, before anyone points out: Yes, I know the hatchlings aren't COMPLETELY detached from the Loop and can join it when they sleep. But the fact is, these thangs never had to sleep before. That wasn't in their species' nature. So that's still weird and foreign for them on both sides. And since the hatchlings now have a circadian rhythm, they can't stay connected to the loop permanently. And also Also, seeing as the previous generations aren't experiencing time linearly, who's to say they even recognize when their child joins the loop? They'll speak with an echo of their child when that child was last asleep ages ago, not knowing that it's not them presently, because there is no 'present' for the older generations.

#i also really really do not understand the ''word count'' explanation given by staff.#I'm honestly rather lenient with ignorance happenings like this so long as they're remedied but.#cutting out important details of lore Fundamental to the understanding of it? For? ''Word count''?#Like firstly. Surely someone on the team is skilled enough to pull that off right? To get all that needs to be said in a short story?#but secondly. w. why is there a word count limit to begin with. This is Your House. Why are you limiting yourself unless this is like #a paid-by-word situation and they don't have the money to afford something longer #but like it feels like shooting yourself in the foot if you're going to write something that leaves a ton of information vague instead of #properly explaining your lore so there's no unfortunate misunderstandings. But I dunno. I'm just rambling #flight rising #fr auraboa #I'll probably be incorporating my Own version of the lore regardless of what the staff decides to do with this presentation of it #or just ignoring it outright hskdgjhskjh we shall See #Also if anything I've said here is Wrong in some way or comes across ignorant in and of itself. Let me know

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astrology-bf · 15 days

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FFXIV Write 2024 | Day 6 "Halcyon"

Master Post | My AO3 | Challenge Info

~ 3k words | Mature | Gen | CW: Semi-Graphic Violence, Death, Heavy Angst, Mild Stormblood Spoilers

(Set after the Scions are called to the First, but before the showdown with Elidibus)

The gunblade shook in Marius’ hand as he did his best to keep his knees from giving out from under him, his nerve rattled by pain from the arrow wound on his left side… but more so the sight before him and his squadmates.

That the eikon-slayer appeared to be a simple man was beyond terrifying.

“Forward!” The centurion’s command cracked through the tension like a whip.

Marius hesitated; as did the other men. One even dared to verbalize his hesitation.

“But-”

The remainder of the protest went unvoiced as the centurion looked sharply at the culprit; that was enough of a reminder of the penalty for disobedience.

“That is an order.” he stated, with firm finality.

“You should probably listen to them.” The eikon-slayer’s voice was clear, but slightly husky at the edges with quiet weariness. He had his eyes fixed on the centurion, but hadn’t moved an ilm since they’d caught sight of him.

The centurion tightened his grip on his own weapon. He hesitated for a moment, then brandished it towards the enemy.

“You are outnumbered, savage,” he said. “Give up.”

The eikon-slayer raised his staff, holding it vertically with the end a mere fulm from the ash-stained earth.

“Last warning.” he said.

Again, there was a beat of hesitation. Then, with an audible intake of breath beneath his helmet, the centurion raised his gunblade.

Marius took a step back.

“For Garlemald!”

The cry was met with wordless shouts as all the men save Marius advanced; weapons raised, putting all thoughts of fearful tales aside as they began their charge to what they tried to convince themselves was a lone man. Easy enough prey.

A quiet breath left the eikon-slayer’s lips, and Marius’ blood turned cold as he saw the Hyur’s expression take on a serenity which was more frightening than anger.

His staff came down, the end striking the earth with a light crack.

There was a flash of pale-blue aether, and all heat was evacuated from the air within an instant: a snap of cold which caused the metal plates of the Garleans’ armor to start warping, buckling, digging into flesh or popping off and leaving it defenseless… not that it mattered, given that the flesh was now more ice than meat.

After a few moments, the aether faded. Marius stood frozen as he gazed in horror at the frozen statues which had once been fellow soldiers. The corpse of the centurion keeled over, and shattered when it struck the ground.

The eikon-slayer watched it fall, and then his eyes flicked up to Marius.

There was a clatter as the gunblade fell from Marius’ hand. His knees gave way, and he gasped at the stab of pain in his left side from the sharp motion. Through trembling, he raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.

“...Please…” he begged.

The eikon-slayer’s chin rose up as he eyed Marius carefully. He said nothing, and the serene expression on his face had faded into bitter weariness. His staff lowered, and he began walking towards the kneeling soldier - weaving around the frozen statues of his former squadmates, so he didn’t disturb them.

Marius’ shaking grew more violent as the eikon-slayer neared him, and his breathing came in panicked gasps.

“Please…” he said. His mind was screaming at him to pick up his weapon, or at least try to run, but pain and fear held him locked tight. “Forgive me, please… Please don’t kill me…”

A quiet sob escaped him as the eikon-slayer came to a halt merely a yalm away. He stared at him, still and silent, his staff in hand even if pointed away from him.

Marius closed his eyes, and thought of his family. He had no gods to pray to, after all.

“You’re injured.”

Marius froze. His eyes opened, and he looked up to see the eikon-slayer was looking at his left side, where the hauberk had been punctured and the hasty patch applied, given they lacked a Medicus.

“...What?” he asked. His voice was nearly a whisper, and all fear had turned to sheer confusion.

The eikon-slayer gestured at his injury. “What happened to you?” he asked.

The Garlean soldier swallowed, blinking furiously. “...An arrow.” he answered, instinctively.

His enemy gave a slow nod. “Do you want me to take a look at it?” He gestured at his injury again, keeping his staff lowered and pointed away from Marius.

Again, Marius blinked. He shook his head. “I don’t understand.”

“I can heal it for you, if you’d like.”

A breath left the Garlean soldier’s lips under his helmet, and his eyes went to the frozen corpses of his former comrades; people he all knew by name, and now were dead by the hand of the same man offering healing. “...You’re insane.”

“Aye. Probably.” The eikon-slayer said, nodding in agreement.

Marius began to shake again.

His enemy then gave a shrug. “Offer’s open, but if not you can head back. Not going to kill an unarmed man.” he said, gesturing and causing his own weapon to vanish as a show of faith.

The only sound that passed between them for a long few moments was Marius’ labored breathing, set against the backdrop of distant artillery and thunder; an endless drumbeat of a march to war upon the Ghimlyt Dark.

Marius swallowed again. His shaking started easing, and as his terror faded the discomfort of the injury made itself known again.

“Would it hurt?” he asked, hesitantly.

The eikon-slayer shook his head. “No,” he answered. “Might be a bit uncomfortable at first, but I’ve been told I’ve got a gentle hand.” Then he paused, looking off to the side and giving a bitter sigh. “For healing, at least.” he added, mournfully.

Another silence lingered in the air before Marius gave a slow nod of agreement. “...All right.”

His enemy moved forward and knelt down next to him, the red-accented white of his short jacket standing out amidst the ash, dirt, and blackened plating of dead soldiers and wrecked magitek. He was careful not to move too suddenly, but even then the poor Garlean couldn’t help but flinch as his enemy began healing him.

True to his word, there was no pain: more of a hot pressure that soon faded like a burn run under water. The tightness where the skin was punctured loosened as the magick knit the tissues back together, keeping them cleansed of any infection.

Marius had been healed by magic before, but admitted that the eikon-slayer had a gentle hand. He even started humming, quietly, stirring thoughts of home in Garlemald when Marius was laid up with a childhood cold and being attended to.

It was strangely soothing, considering the circumstances.

“What’s your name?” The eikon-slayer asked. His eyes had remained fixed on Marius’ injury since he’d begun.

“...Marius.”

“Nice to meet you, Marius. I’m Ifan.” The eikon-slayer - Ifan, rather - glanced up at Marius’ eyepieces and gave a small nod.

Marius swallowed, brown eyes peering at Ifan’s blue from underneath his helm. “The eikon-slayer.” he said, out of pure instinct.

Ifan snorted. “Just ‘Ifan’ is fine.” He shook his head, and went on healing.

The Garlean bit his lower lip and looked away. His fingers still trembled where his hands sat idly.

“You are not like the tales.” he said, at length.

“What do the tales say about me?” Ifan asked, with a note of mirthless amusement.

Marius’ breath caught in his throat, and his chin lowered. “I would not wish to anger you.”

“Odd thing to say, coming from a soldier trying to conquer my homeland.” Ifan said, after humming inscrutably. His tone was strange; more like a performance of being teasing, going through the motions with no substance in it. After a brief pause, Ifan glanced up at Marius again.

“You know what they say about Garleans?” he asked.

Marius shook his head slowly.

Ifan paused as if in hesitation, or perhaps putting more focus into the healing. “They say that you can’t use magic because you don’t have souls,” he began. “That you’re not human, just beasts which look and speak like us. Worse than Amalj’aa, or Sahagin, because at least they don’t try to lure you in by looking like you.”

The Garlean’s brown knitted and his lips parted beneath his helmet, but he blinked in shock as Ifan gave a derisive snort.

“Fuckarse rubbish,” Ifan swore. “Who comes up with shite like that, anyway?” He shook his head, and went on healing.

Marius let out a small scoff, not sure why he found the notion of the eikon-slayer having a foul mouth somewhat amusing. “You do not believe it?” he asked, peering at Ifan.

Ifan shook his head. “Even if I didn’t have Garlean friends, I was raised to see the value in difference and diversity. My mentor was Dalmascan.” he explained.

“Truly?”

“Aye,” Ifan said, nodding again. “He loved his country just as much as you probably love yours, and he did his best to share that love with me. Tried to keep what Dalmasca stood for alive, through me… a dream of harmony.”

He started frowning, then, as his gaze slid off towards the side. He took in the sight of the battlefield where the pair knelt, listened to the distant din of endless fighting, and tried to remember what the sun looked like.

Ifan clicked his teeth, shook his head, and went on healing.

“Your turn, Marius,” he said. “What do they say about me in Garlemald?”

Marius wetted his lips, and looked off to the side to avoid Ifan’s gaze; even the helmet seemed no real cover from those dark blue eyes.

“Some say that you’re an eikon.” Marius answered.

Ifan blinked, seeming surprised. “Oh? Of which god?” he asked.

“Your death deity.” Marius said.

“Nald’thal, hm?” The eikon-slayer let out a whistle, then nodded with an impressed pursing of his lips. “High praise, if a bit blasphemous. Summoned by the Sultanate, no doubt?”

Marius returned a nod.

Ifan took in a breath, glancing up thoughtfully, then looked back at the Garlean soldier’s helmet for a moment. “Why him, specifically?” he asked.

Marius sucked on his tongue. The pain in his left side was fully gone, so it was easier to think; Ifan hadn’t made a move to harm him, so he was owed some candor at the very least. “They say you raise the dead to eat the living, and burn your enemies alive in hellsfire. Some even, uh…” He swallowed, tone growing reluctant.

“Hm?” Ifan coaxed. “Go on.”

“...Some frighten their children with you.” Marius answered, at length. “‘Behave yourself, or Kaleid the Black will come devour you in the night’. That manner of thing.”

The healing stopped. Ifan’s lips parted, then his gaze lowered as his face took on an expression which was nothing short of miserable.

Marius could swear the eikon-slayer looked like he was about to cry.

“...That so?” Ifan said, after a long and sad silence. The magic resumed, and Ifan’s expression hardened.

“Suppose I earned it,” he remarked. “It’s true enough.”

“...What?”

Ifan gave Marius no answer, at least not until he finished healing him. The magic faded for a final time, and the Garlean would have marveled at the way he felt near good-as-new were he not slipping back into a state of fear.

“You’ve heard the name Rhitahtyn sas Arvina before, no doubt.” Ifan asked, standing upright. He offered Marius his hand, keeping it out until he finally worked up the courage to accept it.

The Garlean grunted lightly as he pulled himself up to his feet, as did Ifan. The difference in their height was stark; Marius was pureblooded, and Ifan below average for a Midlander. “Of course. Who hasn’t? You slew him, at-”

“Cape Westwind.” Ifan supplied. He stared up at Marius’ helmet, hands kept at his side and his expression grim. “I was angry. It was ripping me apart inside. So I took it out on him, and anyone who tried to get in the way.”

Marius swallowed. Though afraid, his curiosity proved itself stronger. “What did you do?” he asked.

“You don’t want to know.” Ifan answered, quietly.

Marius’ lips twitched at the warning, but he still insisted. “Tell me.”

The eikon-slayer stared up at him intently, giving him near a full minute to renege. When Marius didn’t, Ifan took in a breath and answered in a quiet, and guilty tone.

“When his men tried to interfere, I raised their dead comrades as ashkin and set them loose,” Ifan said. “Then I held back with Rhitahtyn when I set off that flare inside his armor, so it didn’t kill him right away. He suffered.” Despite his words, the eikon-slayer’s face was completely impassive.

Marius stared back at him, lips parted and his eyebrows fallen at the ends. He hadn’t any answer.

Ifan didn’t let the ugly silence linger, however, and glanced off to the side again.

“Why are you here, Marius?” he asked.

“...For Garlemald.” Marius answered, hesitantly and at length.

The eikon-slayer looked back at his helm again, as if able to peer behind the metal at his eyes. “And what is Garlemald, to you?”

Marius went quiet for a moment as he gave Ifan’s question thought. “It’s my home. Our home. A place we earned, against all odds.” He swallowed, voice gaining confidence at the reminder. “We owe her everything. This is her command.” he said, and finished with a nod.

Ifan’s face twisted disgustedly. “This?” he asked, gesturing around. Then he paused, closed his eyes, and scoffed humorlessly. “...Not that I’m any better. The Alliance tells me who to kill, and I do it. For Eorzea.” he said, nodding at Marius.

Marius blinked. “You do not wish to be here?” he asked.

Ifan looked at Marius as if he was joking. “No.” he said, tone growing aggrieved, “I want to be with my friends, with a man I love, studying magic and having adventures. I don’t want to be stuck in the hells killing people and having children be scared of me.” Then his face twisted, and Marius felt himself frown at just how vulnerable the eikon-slayer looked.

“I’m worried about what it’s doing to me, Marius.” Ifan said carelessly and honestly. “Sometimes I feel like I’ve forgotten that I used to have a life before this.”

The Garlean gave no answer. Instead, he looked at the ground at the uncomfortable reminder of an all too familiar feeling.

“...Suppose it doesn’t make a difference, does it?” Ifan said, giving a sigh. “I chose the job, I need to see it through.”

“Job?” Marius asked, looking back up.

“Aye.” Ifan nodded. “The job.” He gave no further explanation.

Strangely, Marius found himself thankful that the eikon-slayer didn’t tell him what ‘the job’ entailed. The way he said it sounded like a death sentence, to the Garlean’s ears.

The pair stared at each other, silent once again. Marius’ breathing had now eased, but the sounds of warfare in the distance went on ceaselessly.

Marius wet his lips. “...What will you do, now?” he asked.

Ifan hummed to himself briefly. “My orders were to clear the area. It’s clear. So I’ll probably go have a drink, find a man, take a nap, and wait for my next set of orders.” His tone was flat, as was his face, and the words were very practiced. Then he looked back at Marius again. “What about you?”

The Garlean had to take a good minute to give it some thought. That he was alive at all was nothing short of a miracle, at least based on the knowledge the Garlean Empire had of Kaleid the Black; or rather, the image of him that was useful to the Emperor. A merciful adventurer who liked playing with magic wasn’t someone who inspired fear and rage, which were the tools of conquest.

“They would not believe me if I told them you spared me,” Marius answered. “They will likely think I deserted, if I return alone.”

Ifan nodded. “What’s the penalty?” he asked, though he seemed to have a decent guess as to the answer.

Marius swallowed. “...Death.” he said, quietly.

Ifan’s lips pursed. He looked away again, thinking, then let out a long breath and nodded to himself.

“I have a bit of gil. Should be enough to get you somewhere safe, for now.” He reached into his jacket and withdrew a small pouch from a space which seemed too small for it, before stepping forward and offering the coin to Marius. “Go be with your family, if you have any.”

Marius reached up after another pause; not to take the pouch, but rather to remove his helm so he could look the eikon-slayer in the eye. His dark hair was plastered to his forehead around his third eye, and his pale face was flushed with lingering exertion, but his expression was a mask of sad and fearful gratitude. He let the helm fall where it landed with a final thud, before Marius accepted Ifan’s mercy.

“...Thank you.” He said, and took the coin from Ifan before holding on to it carefully; his life depended on it, after all.

Though could likely take his leave, Marius instead kept looking down at Ifan’s face. His lips twisted. “Have you any family?” he asked, unable to disguise the pity.

Ifan shook his head. “Not blooded, but…” His gaze lowered as his face took on a distant cast. “...most of them are gone, now. And I don’t want the other people I care about to see me like this.” The eikon-slayer then looked back up at Marius, and tilted his head apologetically.

Marius didn’t know what to say. But he felt he should say something, so he did.

“I am sorry, Ifan.” he uttered, clutching at the coin pouch Ifan had given him.

Ifan stared at him in silence, and then gave him a faint, sad, but still thankful half-smile.

“Thanks, Marius.” He said. Then he nodded, and took a few steps back before he turned to leave. “...Good luck with your second chance.”

#ffxiv #ffxiv writing #ffxiv fanfiction #writing #fanfiction #ffxivwrite #ffxivwrite 2024 #ffxiv oc #warrior of light #ifan kaleid #let's see what's happening in the Stormblood Bullshit Zone today shall we friends?#when i say ifan is villain coded this is what i mean lol

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toestalucia · 4 months

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i think of this anytime i think of yurius but having the eternals visit levin was so fun. like. initially i was all haha ok? but the yurius & seox convo hello..................i see why they did this......

#stardust speaking !#levin is in that category of 'idc rly' so i went into both recent events like ok we shall see what happens. ended up loving both a lot LOLL #refusing to let yurius sacrifice himself..................#i definitely dont rmbr the entire plot but. i do rmbr rly liking both events a lot. especially the yurius & seox part was sssooooooooo #ouughhhhhhh..................sorry i always get a bit teary when i rmbr seeds of redemption cuz 'i want to live' scenes always gets to me #and in general i laugh cuz that captain funf seox scene was ssooooo enies lobby #im not gonna grab the yurius & seox scene rn but didnt they have something like that too.........lets keep going........

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hyperfocusthusly · 4 months

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This chapter is in re-write number 7 and I am beginning to loose my hair

Send help, anyone please God

Beams, bars and burns

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cosmicstarlatte · 2 years

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Legend says that if you chant "Devilmart Lucifer" 3 times, he will appear and knock you out with a coupon book.

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

Finally got around to drawing Devilmart manager Luci. <333

Uhh this is actually the first time in a long time I drew and colored something so Im actually like...really proud. ajdalkfhakls;

#try his ass and see what happens #anyway about the coupon thing ID LET HIM #obey me lucifer #obey me lucifer headcanons #obey me headcanons #obey me hcs #obey me #obey me shitpost #obey me shall we date #obey me art #obey me fanart #cosmicstarlatte art #crossposted on ig #crossposted on twt #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹#obey me fan art

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seventh-district · 5 months

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so uh. that 2.2 Special Program, huh

#hsr #honkai star rail #hsr 2.2 #hsr spoilers #hsr leaks #the body of this post reads as far less enthusiastic than i really am #i just don’t know how to casually return from my latest 2 week hiatus only to gush abt a game i’ve hardly blogged abt before #but i’m not making a whole ass sideblog for it like i did for Genshin. nah y’all r gonna bear witness to my fixation with this one #so anyways don’t mind me. vibrating into another dimension with anticipation for the next 11 days #it’s insane man. a year ago i Never ever woulda thought i’d be so invested in this game. and it took Months for the game to really grab me #but i’m v glad i kept coming back even when i was struggling to really get into it. like i just had this feeling that if i stuck around and #gave the game a chance to really like. come into its stride. i just always felt like there was Something there and i just hadn’t found it #and holy shit i finally found it in Penacony. the devs really truly outdid themselves with this region and these characters and this story #not to discount everything that’s happened prior. like i was genuinely Liking it all before now but i wasn’t Loving it y’know #but that may be more a ‘me having to fight tooth n’ nail to force myself to consume new media’ thing than it is a matter of the actual game #anyways i came here to talk abt the program! bc since i’m not filming my HSR stuff i’m gonna be insufferable abt it on Tumblr instead ! :)#and i’m probably not filming any more Genshin stuff. or anything else at all for that matter but let’s not talk abt that dead dream #pun not intended lmao. Anyways let’s return to the subject at hand while there’s still room left in these tags shall we #i’m so fucking glad they had Aventurine on this program man. especially since he’s leaked to only have 18 lines in 2.2… it was nice to see-#-him here at least 🥹 i’ll take what i can get. his unenthusiastic little bird noises at the beginning.. him being reluctant to come out..#the way one of the first things to come out of his mouth was ‘y’know DR RATIO once told me…’ like boy we get it ur in love with him 🙄 (/J!)#i love how they can’t go on these programs w/o talking abt each other it’s adorable. AND THE WAY HE WAS THE ONE TO EXPLAIN BOOTHILL’S KIT!?#they can’t just fuel my crackship like this… god and his whole ‘muddle-fudger.. son-of-a-nice-lady?’ thing had me wheezing #Aven mocking Boothill’s inability to curse was not on my special program bingo card but fuck i’m here for it #and Robin being all curious abt him was so cute.. ‘who /is/ he? … does he order milk at the bar?’ i’m crying she’s so sweet #also the trailer was fucking insane. which feels redundant as hell bc all of HoYo’s version trailers go hard but like. still. wow.#that millisecond long shot of Boothill surveying the skyline is so fucking good. also what the fuck is Jing Yuan doing here!!#not complaining at all tho. we’ve got JY & DH(IL?). Argenti(?). Boothill. Sunday. Aven. all my men r here and i am eating so fucking good #Seven.txt #viddy game stuff

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obstinaterixatrix · 1 year

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air was like ‘if someone I hated looked like a character I’d like I’d just stop liking the character’ & I was like ‘if someone I hated looked like a character I like I would shave their head. I have so little in this world. they’re not taking that from me.’ & air was like ‘well you’re always talking about how you just stop caring about things’ & I’m like. this is different. I Know What I’m About.

#my ramblings #if it’s a bald character I guess I’ll glue a wig to their head lol #see if I have to carve out my emotions that’s fine #if I have to carve out what I like you’ll have to rip it out of my cold dead hands #this is when air told me I had my priorities flipped #anyway there’s been a couple of video games and bands I’ve introduced to people and afterwards we had a catastrophic falling out #but 1) they were Mine First 2) they meant a lot to me 3) if anything I’d rather me ruin them for other person #rather than the other person ruin it for me #I’ve curated a very particular jenga tower built to get me through this life on this bxtch of an earth #I’ll bite someone’s hand off before I let them take a block #how do I feel about [x] happening in my life?#well wait two seconds and I can just pop it out and not worry about it for another year #how do I feel about [y] hyperfixation?#the flames of my passion shall only be extinguished on its own timeline #any outside interference shall never be forgiven and will be Dealt With #if it’s confusing simply understand it. my internal logic is sound.

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opens-up-4-nobody · 11 months

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...

#its crazy how much easier it is to do things when youre not completely miserable lol #this past week has been weird bc ive felt really really good and like normal in a way thats kinds unfathomable #im hoping its the medication but my mood was already on an upward tilt and i was told it would take like 6 weeks for the meds to work #property but like ive been sleeping way more than usual. and by that i literally just mean 8hrs a night lol which is weird for me #like that never ever ever happens multiple days in a row. so idk. when i feel better it makes the 0cd way easier to manage as well #and im just generally not as anxious. on the more worrisome side i kinda just give less of a fuck so like i have an exam im not ready for #Tuesday and im just kinda like hm fuck that lol. ill go thru lil fluctuations of having a lot of energy too #like: i could run around in circles rn. i dont have to but i could. like yesterday i was out with friends and i was like bouncing up and #down while standing and rocking from side to side while sitting. which i kinda do anyway while in crowds but it was more to expend energy #last night i also got like 5hrs of sleep. so like maaaaybe ive been on the bleeding edge of mood elevation but for the most part it just #feels good and not destructive. like if i felt like this all the time that would b fantastic. its like oh so this is y ppl dont long to b #put out of their misery lol. depression? who? i dont kno her. sounds fake. but as soon as i fucking say that ill b fucking slapped back #down to earth. ugh. annoying. no emotional object permanence. i hope its the meds. if this is the person i am under layers of misery then #that is fucking so insane. we shall see. im curious to hear what the psychiatrist thinks of my brain when i follow up with her #i gave her my full dys1exia assessment which gives a pretty good picture of how my head functions. oh fuck i bet i would do waaaayyy better #on thise test if i took it in this state of mind. but anyway she has that on top of like 3 assessment sheets i filled out #dispite everything i still want someone to categorize me into a discreet box. tell me doc. am i really bip0lar? really really?#ur sure??? like 1000% sure bc my brain wont let me accept that unless its beyond a reasonable doubt. i just doesn't seem that serious.#i mean. it is but like ya kno. its not that bad. ay. this glob of mush behind my eyes runs me in circles #but for now thats ok bc i feel like i could run up a mountain or punch someone in the face lol #unrelated

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galacticlamps · 5 months

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actually ascension needs its own post since that's the one with the most details to speculate over and im starved for soho talk so i will talk to myself if need be

First the cover again, because I kinda can't get over it:

my only thing is that I had been hoping we might get Lizbeth on a cover again since she's never been on one of the boxsets before, despite being the 2nd person credited on all 4 of them (even if that's just alphabetical, still, she's the only one of the four main characters who never makes the cover)

But letting that go...

I know we already kinda knew the brief for this one but damn I didn't expect it to go quite this hard. Maybe that's just because the Parasite & Ashenden covers were (comparatively) similarish to each other and I was so pleased with Unbegotten's, and then got so used to it as the placeholder for Ascension while they kept postponing it, I wasn't expecting anything this colorful or detailed or with what I can't help but register as Fun New Outfits even though these are still like, pretty damn basic as far as costumes go. Still, it's a different vibe from everyone in suits and trenchcoats on every cover, technically. (Oh the woes of being an audio fan such that two characters owning sweaters actually does qualify as new information)

On top of just being visually delightful though, I know we knew religion was gonna be a fairly big part of this one, but I didn't actually expect to get quite this much of it - though I'm glad of it for a number of reasons. The BF twitter already made the ineffable joke so I don't have to, but also yeah I did very much spend all of season 2 episode 4 of good omens half convinced Samuel Barnett & Dervla Kirwan were about to pop up around any given corner (if you will go around being gay supernatural and horrible at your messy bureaucratic jobs in midcentury soho then I'm sorry, this is where my brain's gonna go) - so, fuel to that fire. But in terms of actual important things, at least one of my Soho wishes looks to be being granted because we have a Rev Edward Folgate on the cast list, which must mean we're finally meeting Norton's father, even if his mother & brother don't appear (which they could, technically, I've definitely seen BF not list all the doublings on their cast tabs before). Religion, domesticity, and the nuclear family are all things that absolutely fascinate me when it comes to Norton's character, so getting any amount of story involving his father & his church is something I've been actively hoping for for a long time now.

(I will say I'm a tiny bit bummed Saffron Coomber isn't on the cast list to play Mia again, but I kinda figured she wasn't going to be since Greg Austin's Armitage, who's making his first recurring appearance after originating in Unbegotten, was listed ever since the boxset was announced - presumably if she was also returning, that would've been handled in the same way. But since Unbegotten ended with Lizbeth and Mia going on a date, I still held out hope. Who knows though, maybe things did go well for them and Lizbeth just has a better work/life balance than Norton so she can date someone without them getting dragged into every scifi plot. I know that's not a very common accomplishment for any Torchwood agent, but a gal can hope)

At this point I know I'm completely in the realm of speculation & even wishful thinking, but I'm really really hoping we get some more clues as to Norton's overall timeline in this one, and I have a feeling that even if there's nothing as direct as dates given, the events of a plot like this one are going to heavily influence my personal interpretation of it.

To say that life & death are major themes for the soho crew feels wildly reductive, but even by Torchwood's standards and taking into account its origins as a piece of media with Jack Harkness & his newfound immortality at the heart of it, the living/dead status of this bunch has always been fantastically up in the air to me. Obviously Ghost Mission introduced Norton as kind of a ghost before revealing more obvious ghostly characters later on to which the title might have been referring, but his being from the past did beg the question of his survival into Torchwood's present era all the same, which Outbreak later alludes to much more directly, and his habit of showing up via hologram in multiple stories only further obfuscates any certainty we might have about where & when he definitely can be said to be alive and well. Then you've got Lizbeth and Gideon both being effectively 'brought back to life' via paradoxes that prevented them ever having died in the first place. Again, they are very very far from being the only Torcwhood characters this happens to (for a sprawling EU, it's really rather impressive how often & in how many different ways Torchwood as a whole manages to circle back to being about like. chaotic undead queers at the end of every day. though I suppose that consistency is part of why I keep falling in love with its different iterations again and again). That's without even getting into the question of Norton's dubious fate in God Among Us - and I say dubious because I know some people take that to be his ultimate death, but I personally think that reading something as vague as that as having any kind of finality rather goes against the spirit of this whole world/series, not just because I want him to live. (There are obviously other ways to make him survive/reappear, but I don't see this as a River Song scenario where we can safely assume one of his earlier-released adventures had to happen at the end of his personal timeline). But wherever God Among Us falls for him, he does very much meet God in it - or at least, a god, since the sentinel in Unbegotten is also described as a god of sorts, and even if he doesn't ultimately have the status of the god Jacqueline King is playing there, Unbegotten is still full to bursting with ghosts/undead/came back wrong/echo characters to continue underscoring that life/afterlife theme.

So all things considered, even allowing for the fact that we know Norton's twin hobbies are lying about himself and abusing time travel to suit his own ends/ever-shifting alliances, I find it difficult to believe we could get through a whole 6-part boxset about religion & death without something providing some kind of compelling evidence about where this adventure fits in among his other run-ins with apocalypses and gods and ghosts and dead-but-still-here characters/creatures, so I'm very much looking forward to any further exploration on that front.

And lastly, and least intellectually, I really want to know what the hell 20th-century Torchwood's obsession with Reginalds is. Reading through the cast list, I had to do two separate doubletakes over the character 'Sir Reginald Peebles' - firstly, because I had Reginald Rigsby on the brain, this being Soho (and the other Troughton brother being so active on BF's releases for this same month) - and secondly, because reading this in conjunction with the announcement for the July monthly adventure in which the new main Torchwood guy of the 20s is apparently called Sir Reginald Dellafield, there was a brief moment where I took that monthly release to be a tie-in with Ascension. I don't expect it to be, but damn. was it really so popular a name?

anyways, catch me thinking about those stained glass windows for the next couple months I guess (and knowing Torchwood Soho, for a long long time after it comes out as well lol)

#torchwood soho: ascension #let's start with the most obvious shall we? behind norton - hellfire or divine radiance? whadda we think?#i know one's much more likely for him but also consider: he's been a fairly good boy by norton standards anyway lately #well i say 'lately' like i know when this takes place #idk why but i kinda feel like this starts very soon after unbegotten #comedy is probably why honestly. since that ends with them being like hey! something went right!#i think ever since i first heard that i was like ok cool so the next installment's gonna be something earth shatteringly bad #& it's gonna kick off dramatically literally one second after this scene ends right?#not that it wouldnt be nice to have some (clearly-defined) timeskip there #tbh i feel like that's the one thing that's missing with soho sometimes - those little medium-sized gaps in continuity #where either speculation or even a missing scenes style fic would go #between parasite & ashenden lizbeth was dead and andy wasnt in the right era for soho shenanigans #and norton and gideon went through SO much offscreen (offmic?)#rebuilding torchwood and starting a relationship and breaking up and getting possessed by space eels and destroying torchwood again #that's like... Too Much to analyze/meaningfully discuss without a few more details from canon #and between Ashenden & Unbegotten it's very unclear how much time has passed #norton certainly seems affected when he sees gideon again for the first time but we also know he went there for him so how long was it?#that and we have literally zero explanation for what andy's doing in the 50s in that one to begin with. has he been there continuously?#or did he leave and come back? if so did norton even have to try justifying it to him?#or does andy just accept at this point that he'll be summoned for anything norton feels is noteworthy? honestly either's plausible w him #but also we have so little confirmed about what torchwood looks like at this point in time!#maybe andy gets summoned for all missions bc he norton and lizbeth are virtually the only agents left after gideon quits #there's just a few too many things unexplained/alluded to for me to go total total fandom mode on this #speculating & theorizing about everything that happens off-audio #doubtless this is mainly bc of norton's general untrustworthiness #like im sure a different main character would've left the audience with fewer uncertainties after this many hours of storytelling #but with soho im still left needing just a tiiiiiny bit more before i feel im knowledgeable enough about the situation to expand upon it #in the traditional fandomy 'transformative' way #right now most of my fanning over it is just speculation about what precisely we can be confident in from the dialogue we do have #but i'd like to go further than that truly. these characters captivate me. obviously.

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majoringinsarcasm · 1 year

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OK SO NOT TO BE EVEN MORE DELUSIONAL if Bees don’t happen tomorrow it’s fine literally I’m not even worried bc I know it will this volume BUT LET ME GET UP ON THIS STEPLADDER TO REACH FOR A MINUTE (also for context I am getting the episode numbers from crunch roll I think they might’ve been slightly different originally on YouTube but it’s fine I’m already reaching)

Volume 1 Chapter 6: The Emerald Forest is when Blake and Yang locked eyes and became partners BEFORE they even joined a team. So in a world where team rwby never happened they would still be partners on another team. Also could be argued Blake picked Yang on purpose bc we see her dart by in the foreground. You know. Also side note but Yang asking the Grimm if they’ve seen a girl in a red hood vs Ruby asking Little if they’ve seen a girl with long blonde hair. Sisters, your honor.

Volume 2 Chapter 6: Burning the Candle. DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY MORE? Some could say it’s one of the defining moments of early series Blake and Yang, it’s so good you can just say the title and the ones who get it get it. Highlights are the laser pointer which I found personally fun, early volume humor I love you, hugging your sleep deprived stressed girl best friend and then saying you’ll save her a dance. Also shout out to shirtless Ren??? Forgot about that and Nora in the background pretending not to listen to him and Jaune talk lol. Also early volume Renora my BELOVED

Volume 3 Chapter 6: Fall is when the fake out leg break happens with Mercury which isn’t a Bees moment but that later sparks the conversation all the girls have about believing Yang really saw him attack first and Blake bringing up how this reminds her of Adam but deciding to trust in Yang anyway. Volumes four and five don’t have Bee moments tied to their respective chapter sixes.

However the bees are thinking about each other while they are apart, with Blake seeing Yang in Sun’s place when he’s attacked by Ilia plus Sun literally calling out that Yang would want Blake to be with her even when things are bad. And Yang’s “what if I needed her here for me?” when she and Weiss have their little heart to heart in V5.

Volume 6 Chapter 6: Alone in the Woods: a personal favorite of mine in general. They are at the farm, they are above the Apathy, Qrow gets his first big wake up call in terms of his alcoholism and how it affects his family. Yang grabs Blake by the hand to lead her out of the house even though she doesn’t really Need to and Weiss gets to torch the place because she also has a parental figure who struggles with drinking and it affects her. Love this episode a true banger.

Volume 7 Chapter 6: A Night Off: Blake and Yang are going dancing. Neither are very good at it and it’s very cute. Featuring a hand on the shoulder as Blake does her makeup and Yang sitting like a lesbian on the bed behind her and smiling as she does said makeup. Also Blake’s giggle she laughs at whatever Yang does. I love mutually down bad couples. Also Weiss watching half of her team be gay dorks and deciding to go to the movies with Oscar and Jaune bc she refuses to be a third wheel for another second. Highlight for me personally is the beginning when everyone is training I love shots like that I think it’s cute and fun and. I miss when they could act like this before. The Horrors truly set it. Also the beginnings of Ren semblance evolution and the Rosegarden crumb haha. Also Yang chasing after Blake and her shadows as they are fishing was also cute.

Volume 8 Chapter 6 is Cinder’s backstory but V8 does have the bee reunion face cradle and forehead touch as well as Yang’s conversation with Jaune that he mistakenly thinks is about Ruby, as well as Blake’s conversation with Nora about needing to know who you are outside of your relationship and how They don’t have to be all You are.

WHICH BRINGS US NOW TO VOLUME 9 CHAPTER 6. Not every cute or significant Bee moment is tied to chapter six and they have more than one movement to talk and have moments in each volume. I just had a lil breakthrough and wanted to check when they became partners and what chapter burning the candle was and went down a rabbit hole.

Again IF there’s no confession in like 10 hours do Not let the bad faith haters get you down. We are coming off a wild episode and I personally missed my boy Jaune so much and want to know what happened to him. We will see how all that plays out. But the evidence is there and has been for years and has been pointed out in universe so if it doesn’t happen it’s ok to be disappointed but please trust that it Will happen.

But if it DOES? No bigger bottles will be popped. We win either way; it just depends on when. See y’all on the other side!

#rwby 9 spoilers #bumbleby #blake bellodona #yang xiao long #long post #once again if it doesn’t happen this weekend DO NOT LET THE BAD FAITH HATERS GET TO YOU #nobody knows what queerbait really is and many don’t actually like the show anymore OR #they call actually lgbt fans idiots for ‘falling for RT’s crap’ or whatever #but anyway I wrote all of this and scrambled to check the episodes in like half an hour if that so I hope you like my rapid ramblings #we are not clowns but court jesters and I happily dance my dance until the queen bees have their garden moment #maybe it’s tomorrow! we shall see #🖤💛

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thebigshotman · 9 months

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M!A (whenever the admin feels like it) where Spamton is an Addison again...however it's a painful transition, like turning into a werewolf. He'll actually look his age, and experience all the side affects that comes with someone who's pushing 50.

(Sorry this is starting two weeks after you sent me this lol! I hope any ensuing chaos is worth the wait! Let’s give this about 3-4 days; it’ll end on Christmas night!)

The second he hears the words “Addison again”, he is glitching and twitching happily with joy-so much so that the rest of the request, the catch as it were, goes completely unheard.

*4N [All we do is advertise!] AGA1N, RE-E-3ALLY?!?!? I’VE WANTED THIS F0R [*absurdly long number*] MONTHS, F1NALLY I CAN [[mwah!]] [Hazelnut] AND—

That’s when the transformation begins.

It starts with cracks forming all over his skin, and it feels unbearably itchy, like something is trying to burst forth from underneath. His hair is falling out in clumps-not again, it’s just reminding him of when everything started falling apart-his teeth are shrinking and growing back into his mouth. It feels incredibly uncomfortable; it should almost hurt more. But it doesn’t.

He tries to let out any sort of yelp of pain and confusion and panic, but can’t: His voice box is a garbled mess in the middle of transitioning back into a normal throat. He feels bumping in his chest, and that’s what brings him to his knees. The ground only does so much to center him, reassure him that what’s coming after this will be worth it. He pounds it aggressively with a fist, glasses spilling out static as he grits his teeth-

And the plastic falls off, revealing silicone skin underneath. Like a cascade, the rest of his body follows suit, and soon the itchiness stops and he’s back in his old, Addison body again. Natural hair-except this time it’s half-black and half-white, like the hair dye has almost run out-expressive eyes, a heart and a non-glitched throat. His clothing miraculously unaffected by the “painful” caveat of the transformation, instead having transitioned back to normal fabric clothes without a word.

Except…something’s different. He can feel something lagging still. Not in his mind, for once…in his body. He tries to get up, and it takes several moments of stuttering frames to do so. For Heaven’s sake…they didn’t just turn him back into an Addison. They turned him into an out of date Addison who hasn’t had their internal software upgraded in 25 years. What he should be.

*You…had to throw in a twist, didn’t you? Clearly I haven’t had enough deals with catches in my life, have I?!

He spits that out more aggressively than intended, less towards the anon and more for the desperate need for something to go right in his life for once with no strings attached. Looks like it hasn’t caught up to his voice yet.

But he can worry about that later. Right now, minus any catches, he has his old body back…and for how long, he has no idea. He’s making the most of this. The first thing he does, like before, is clip off his glasses and rub his normal, Addison eyes in relief. But now, unlike before, he goes running towards his girlfriend’s house.

*Eileen!! Hazelnut!! Where are you?! Come here, I want to give you a big smooch-l-like an actual kiss!! I’m an Addison again!!!

#(and so it begins!! the longer he’s like this the more side effects will start showing themselves)#(so let’s see what shenanigans happen shall we? non-M!A threads will still continue by the way)#(but asks and threads caused by this M!A (as well as Christmas presents) will take precedence)#(feel free to send stuff in even though I’m logging off for the night lol)#WANNA MAKE A [deal]?-asks and submissions #ONE WEIRD TIP-in character #NOTHING MORE THAN A SIMPLE PUPPET-main verse #m!a: an (out of date) addison again #tw body horror #tw transformation horror #(just in case!)

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