#but maybe somebody might find something interesting v

[wayward-sherlock]

why oh why were there only little circles in the 1, 4, 5, 6, and 8 in the plinko in the rainbow room? why was el trying to get it into the 3? why did it keep going in the 5?

[earlgreytea68]

Since we’re all kind obsessed with that excerpt from joes book (and for good reason it’s gold) I’m adding my thoughts:

1) I know we’re focusing on the peterick of it all bc it’s great but something gets to me about joe latching on to Patrick and his voice, like listening to the demos, showing them to pete, insisting they get him to sing even though pete didn’t like the recordings (which is hilarious but speaking of eowyg era I can see why, Patrick was SO young). Like this teenage joe got into a debate with some random kid and listened to a shitty demo, but something in there made him go yeah, that’s it, that’s our secret weapon, and I’m not letting Pete leave until he hears it too. Their friendship…..

2) and okay now the peterick and the rest. I think it is a combination of everything you and others have mentioned, where Patrick is just a little magic in person when performing, there’s Something that even early on without as good a handle on his voice must have been there. And Pete was Gone from moment one when he opened that door like there’s a reason that memory is burned into his head so hearing him in person after that he didn’t stand a chance

3) my theory on what was different about Patrick singing is two-fold: iirc, the demos were songs hed written, and he’s said before that early on he sometimes wrote songs out of his vocal range bc he didn’t know what his range was and he wasn’t focused on the singing at all it was about the Music, so maybe he either just didn’t do much impressive or interesting with vocals bc that wasn’t the focus, or he wrote something that didn’t suit his voice. He also had different musical influences than the others so his songs just might not have been to their taste. But when he’s singing songs they know and love? V different situation, they get to hear him sing the style of music he would be for the band.

The second part of the theory is Patrick has also said that early performances bc he was nervous he started out more imitating how other artists sang and that confidence over time was partially learning how to sing like Himself. So for the audition if he were singing songs by someone else it might have been easier for him to perform if he was trying to match someone else’s tone and and delivery, and might have forced him to show off range and vocal agility and little more than songs he wrote for himself.

This got really long but combo of a lot of factors with a heavy dose of Patrick being adorable and endearing and clearly knowing his stuff with music if he can just pull out these songs on request

I love that Joe immediately thought Patrick seemed cool and he wanted to hang out with him more, like, he definitely recognized a kindred hopeless music nerd who he could keep debating with endlessly. And he was like, "So let's find something for him to do" lol

THE FACT THAT THAT MEMORY IS BURNED INTO HIS HEAD. Sorry, I will just never get over how vividly Pete talks about the first time he saw Patrick.

This is SUCH a good point, you're so right. Patrick doesn't think he's a singer. He never has and he definitely didn't back then. He didn't give his singing any effort at all, and you're right, he wrote songs out of his own range, he didn't know how to show his voice off and he wasn't comfortable doing it anyway. But yeah, he can totally imitate somebody else, why not, absolutely. That's not him performing, that's a persona, and that he can nail. And I'm sure that would held him come alive a little bit.

(I still, btw, think that Patrick doesn't consider himself to be singing. It's Pete who's singing. Patrick considers himself to be up there doing his best Pete impression, being Pete's voice because Pete doesn't sing for himself. That's what we're getting up there. We are the beneficiary of all the love and affection that Patrick showers upon Pete when he stands up there and delivers his words to us.)

[marshmallowprotection]

This is so random but would Saeyoung be okay w a trial lawyer/Adjuctator MC? I'm playing his route while I'm reading about laws and human rights.

I don't see why not. Like, I understand the hesitation to believe that he would give someone in the law field a chance. He's committed a lot of crimes over the years, and he has to live with the things that his agency made him do.

I think it's worth pointing out that one of the main reason why he shirks off his work is because he wants to find a way to not hurt innocent people if he can help it, and the only reason why he gets his work done in the end is because he doesn't have any other choice.

That guilt likely eats away at him, but he made the painful choice as a child to live this life of pain for Saeran's freedom. Of course, we all are well-aware of how that choice played out... Being with him means you need to understand that things are not black and white in this world. It's important for anybody who works in law to understand that you need to look at things from a broader perspective than to throw the book at someone all the time. Are you okay with that? He has nothing against you, because you have a kind heart and you do believe in justice... but will your sense of justice abhor his sense of justice?

I think that's the larger question to ask yourself.

You need to look at what he's done to survive and why he doesn't feel guilty about some of those things. Saeyoung likely stole things from stores all the time as a little kid, clothes, food, medication, you name it. Do you have a problem with that? Do you have a problem with the act of theft even if it's the only way for someone to survive? Are you okay with the fact that Saeyoung's done things to survive that may ask you to look at what the definition of a crime is?

You're going to have your morals tested and I would truly hope you wouldn't think less of him because people will do what they have to do to survive. It's a litmus test in my opinion. Can you be okay with what he's done to survive? Does it bother you? Do the small thing bother you? Because, if the same things bother you, we're going to have a problem when it comes to the larger misdeeds he's committed for the agency... and it remains to be seen canonically everything he had to do... and from what I know, I know it wasn't pretty.

I also know that he... was a victim of harassment and maybe worse given what we know about the agency making him dress up for the missions they send him on. He loves dressing up, but... the agency forces him to fit roles to get close to sleezebags. We don't know if he personally kills those guys, or if someone takes care of the job while he plays the bait, but... that's another thing he has to live with and I know an MC would support and comfort him through him admitting what happened to him if something did happen.

He just... likely won't get justice for those events because everything is so tangled in the agency's destruction. I hate that for him, but the fact is, we're limited by what we know because Saeyoung doesn't like to talk about it, but I would be interested to see how an MC engages with the aspects of what Saeyoung suffered from a legal perspective. What kind of justice would you think possible for him? I think one of the only things you could do would be to fight his father, since most of the things he's suffered can't be proven or may not have enough evidence to try someone if that person isn't already dead.

Are you okay with the fact that he might have killed someone? Can you stomach that with your sense of justice? Because, he doesn't regret what he's done as I imagine most of the people he's targeted himself have been the worst of the worst. He certainly didn't hesitate regarding Rika in V’s Route.

He was about to get rid of her and himself. He is somebody who will not hesitate to take justice into his own hands, and if that bothers you, that's going to be something that you two are going to have to talk about. Because there are times when he will do things that skirt the line of morality, and he will not feel bad about getting rid of someone who's a horrible person. Are you okay with that? Yes? No? Maybe?

At the end of the day, there would be no problem with him being romantically entangled with you on his end once you are able to reason with that stubborn man, but there might be all the reason in the world for you to feel torn about him if you're somebody with a high sense of morality. Saeyoung may not regret some of the things he's done, but I know he might regret a few... but at he end of the day, it was him or them, and he chose himself first just in case he might live to see Saeran again someday.

Are you okay with all of that? 

It's not a bad thing if that bothers you, and he wouldn't hold it against you. Most people understand where he's coming from and what he's gone through, but I think it's interesting to point out some people may feel torn with a high sense of morality for justice. Of course, not every person who is a lawyer or in the law field thinks with this black and white morality, but many of them do. There's some that don't think it's okay to do this or that, and some who understand that life is hard, and you gotta do what you gotta do.

He would be ultimately respectful if you're somebody who wants more than anything to make the world a better place because the world deserves to be a better place created by those with very kind hearts. 

I can imagine he might tease you if none of this bothers you and you still know about some of the questionable things he's done. You can get a lot of amusement out of that aspect, a game of cat and mouse, but I don't see too many people think about the heavier thoughts that might go into this whenever I see an MC like this. 

[mobileexo-forceofthekoreanarmy]

Lore post ! I don’t know where else to put this but did you know that the Korean translation of Hana’s Academy cosmetic lore implies she actually won the world championship with D.Mon and King (presumably in a World Cup for team Korea; the latter was still her archrival likely on another team)? I’ve always assumed she beat out Kyung-soo, but the wording is so fundamentally different in Korean—in English, note that it says she surpassed both of these people to win (though we knew she was on the same team as Yuna). Below is a translation of the Korean version:

My partner is big into esports (and also just the best gamer I know LOL) and said that this actually makes the art from shooting star of D.Va kissing the trophy alone make more sense because it was likely an MVP award, which goes to just one person in a competition. So, yes her stats and prestige likely outranked King and D.Mon (surpassed them, if you will) but they played together? And during the regular season were probably on separate teams hence the “arch rivalry”.

And all of this is supported by her canon Taegeukgi skin, which states explicitly that she represented Korea worldwide! And Michael Chu saying (his words) that her and King were “neck-in-neck” rivals makes sense when you consider they likely won the same worldwide titles together on the Korean team.

I think it’s crazy how different the wording is between the two translations and that King and D.Va actually have shared history. I’d love to know what that meant for their rivals dynamic and if they were potentially friends before MEKA? Maybe I’ll draw something. Also this basically confirms that neither Overlord nor Casino played the same competitive game (Mecha Guardian V) as the rivals and Yuna. (Jae-eun was likely never a pro gamer guys I’m sorry gamer casino truthers but formula 1 is a full-time gig and since they’re likely around 23-24 it’s improbable that they did both 😭😭) + lots of little hints imply Seunghwa actually played StarCraft! If they played MGV, they would likely have also been mentioned in the lore blurb as they would also have been top Korean players who represented the country.

This is probably a bit silly but I thought somebody else might find it cool maybe? We have such limited explicitly-stated MEKA lore so I like to synthesize 🩵💕 maybe I’ll do it on something else sometime. And if you want me to talk about another MEKA-squad related topic or compile info abt it my ask box is open for others with worms in the brain LOL

Also hi :] I’m back on this account 😭 since my last post I found out I have autism and also have come to terms w the MEKA squad being my special interest for years now so I hope to be a lot more active. Idk if this goes anywhere but I’d love a space to post abt this stuff and am carving out this one ♡

[lunarsilkscreen]

Sex - Gender Identity - Gender Presentation - Gender Interpretation - Sexuality

These 5 categories make up how we understand sex, gender, "queer" and "non-queer" people. Queer itself, is a label applied to queer looking people by *non-queer-people*. Hence the effort to "reclaim" it by people who actually identify as queer, and the efforts to stop its use against people who do not.

Sex makes up the physical sexual characteristics of a person. This mostly affects physical sexual characteristics (whatever P* you got assigned) and secondary sexual characteristics, which may or may not be affected to a degree by whichever sex hormone runs typically through your veins.

But to a greater or lesser extent, it really only affects facial hair, and maybe how fast you gain non-lean muscle. If this was a 100% certainty, Alex Jones wouldn't be making bank on selling supplements to people that look like him.

Which, those things can also just be affected by your protein intake.

Gender Identity is the gender your brain mass identifies closest too. And can affect your subconscious behaviors and mannerisms. Closeted trans people tend to have to consciously perform actions based on how feminine or masculine they are. Which isn't always the case, and is also a part of etiquette in highbrow society.

Gender Presentation is how a person presents themselves. Not only with mannerisms as described above, but clothes, makeup, behaviors and activities.

Many people chose which hobbies to engage in, not whether or not they enjoy them, but based on their correlation with the appropriate thing for a specific gender to do.

That's why most every boy scout turns out to be closeted. And why most straight boys never join boy scouts. Most queer boys are taught to be more masculine/feminine because they lack in the masculinity department. And "straight boys" are often described doing "boys will be boys" things.

Gender Interpretation starts with what I just said about boys being taught to be more manly when they appear to not be. This has nothing to do with the individual, instead, it's a category placed onto a person.

This happens in a lot of places, and affects non-trans non-queer people at the same rates as trans and queer people. Anytime somebody doesn't look manly or womanly enough, or when a person gets "tricked" because the person they were sexually interested in wasn't what they thought they were.

And that ties in directly with Sexuality. As children we're ingrained with "boy meets girl" or rather "PE meets VA". But that's not something you can be 100% certain of *without* getting naked. Looking the part only gets you so far of course.

And unreasonably, or irrationally, if a person (usually a cis man) falls for (as in falls in love) a woman, only to find out that they are not a woman, or worse; a trans woman. They have an existential break down.

Instead of just saying "I do not consent with this" they instead feel how a woman feels when she's forced into having sex with a man she doesn't like.

Like, he's got this far, there's no backing out, unless He Kills Them...

That, is an irrational reaction to seeing something you don't agree with. (A woman with a D* or a Man with a V*.) Instead of just being like *nope I'm out*.

Or feeling like you were the one lied to and saying your time with somebody you *thought* could get, or could get you, pregnant.

Even though most Men just ghost when they hear that news.

Don't wanna get anybody pregnant, get offended when they fall in love with someone who can't get pregnant.

Sorry intersex and infertile people. I'm totally stepping on your territory here. They do get the shortest stick of all though. They don't even get to be in the properly gendered category*ever*. And have to figure out themselves what they are

Worse, they might be assigned sexual characteristics based on what their parents want their child to be (even if it's not viable.) So not only do they get f* by God, they get f* by their parents and the doctor that was present when they were born, and they get erased completely from every facet of life, except for their appearance.

And their whole existence is based on gender Interpretation, and never who they actually might be.

Seriously. Same though.

I'd give you my working bits if that was a possibility.

[greensparty]

Concert Review: Sting

September 7, 2023 @ MGM Music Hall Fenway (Boston, MA)

In the history of rock music, I don't think there's any musician that can boost the listener's intelligence just by listening to them (or at least make the listener FEEL more intelligent) than Sting. Ok maybe Rush, but Sting both as a solo artist, with The Police and his numerous collaborations is truly a lyrical genius and you find yourself thinking a bit about the analogies and references he's making in ways you might not with just any artist, i.e. I'm not sure how many other artists made reference to Krushchev or Nabakov on Top 40 radio! The brilliance in Sting's lyrics is that he is taking these really big philosophical ideas and fitting them into melodies that are accessible enough for the masses. Musically, Sting is pure genius too. Bursting out of the London rock scene in the late 70s, The Police set the world on fire. They were truly bigger than the sum of their parts. Sting was the main songwriter, singer and bassist. For a group that incorporated various genres including punk, reggae, pop, new wave, jazz, and rock it takes a certain level of musicianship to excel at all of those sounds. Over the Summer I got to see former Police guitarist Andy Summers and I was blown away by the pure musicianship and reminded of how The Police were one of the great trios in history. Now I got to see Sting for the first time on his My Songs tour at MGM Music Hall Fenway, a venue that still has that "new car smell" about a year after opening.

Sting onstage

I never got to see The Police as I was too young to go to concerts in the early 80s and I'm kind of kicking myself for not going to The Police reunion tour in 2007. For one reason or another I've never gotten to see Sting live until now. I'm by no means the biggest Sting fan, but I've always had the utmost respect for him as an artist. 1991's The Soul Cages was one of the first CDs I got when I first got a CD player. Through this blog I've gotten the chance to review his 2021 compilation Duets and The Bridge, his most recent studio album. His solo work is often times in the shadow of his work with The Police and in the case of this concert, 7 of the 20 songs were Police songs. But seriously - do not underestimate his solo work. With the exception of one song from The Bridge, every song he played was from the 70s, 80s and 90s, which is playing the hits for the casual fans as well as the hardcore fans. Personally I kind of wanted for him to play "I Can't Stop Thinking About You", which was one of my Best Songs of 2016. Maybe next time!

Sting and the band rocking out

The entire band and backup singers were tight and Sting came out strong with "Message in a Bottle", one of my favorite Police songs. Among the highlights of this show was his between-song banter believe it or not. He addressed the shows he's played in Boston over the years starting with The Rat in 1978 (side note: one of the interviewees in my documentary Life on the V: The Story of V66 was Ralph Fatello who talked about how The Police played their first Boston show at The Rat opening for his band Vinny, that is featured on an extra feature on the DVD), the Paradise, the Orpheum, Fenway Park and more. He also had something interesting to say about writing a love song, saying "When a song is 'I love you, you love me', that's not interesting. But when it's 'I love you, you love somebody else' that's interesting to me!" That explains a ton about his numerous songs about unrequited love. Other highlights included "If You Love Someone Set Them Free", "Brand New Day", "All This Time" and "Walking on the Moon". One of the big highlights of the show was the performance of possibly my favorite Police song "King of Pain". Joining Sting for vocals was musician Joe Sumner of the band Fiction Plane, who opened the show, and happens to be Sting's son. I bring this up because it was somewhat surprising since Sting originally wrote "King of Pain" after the separation of his ex-wife, Joe's mother and now Joe was singing it with his Dad. Whoa!

Sting holding court at this epic show

This was a night of peak musicianship and performance! Just weeks away from Sting's 72nd birthday, I'm fortunate I got to see him. I know this isn't nearly the same as seeing the Synchronicity stadium tour in 1983, but boy does he still have that magic (pardon the pun and forgive me, but every little thing)!

For info on Sting: https://www.sting.com/

Photos by Leah Talatinian

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | The Astro-Zombies (Mikels, 1968)

There’s only one scene in this movie that’s actually pleasant to look at, and it’s at a restaurant with a topless dancer. There are two reasons for this. Reason number one: there are boobs. (I guess this could be both reasons.) Listen, I hate to sound like a creep here, but I’m gonna summarize the rest of the review here and say that the movie doesn’t have a lot going for it, so yes, the fact that this scene gave me something to latch on to (that something being boobs) automatically makes it the best scene. Reason number two: there are colours. With an S. For plural. As in, there are multiple colours in this scene. Not only that, but there things like contrast, brightness and all sorts of other things that sound like settings on your TV and you probably take for granted in most movies. Outside of this scene, this is remarkably unpleasant to look at. I don’t know if somebody told Ted V. Mikels that it would be cheaper to process the film at the lab if he used fewer colours, but the whole thing is shot in a singularly unappealing mix of brown and beige. The average bowel movement has a more distinct colour scheme.

The plot here is... I dunno. I think it had something to do with espionage. Something about astro-men, although that term is wildly misleading. Listen, I do not have the best recollection of the particulars of the plot. In large part, it’s because the movie was excruciatingly boring and I was tuning it out as a result. But I also suspect that my brain was angry with me for subjecting it to this movie, and started burning off brain cells in retaliation, because if I’m gonna waste them on this, I might as well not have them in the first place. If any reviews I write in the future are noticeably dumber, this is the reason. There are movies I affectionately refer to as boring garbage where nothing happens (Manos was a recent viewing in this category), but in those cases, the movies at least move interestingly. This is gruelingly inert, just scene after scene of characters standing around talking to each other in ugly rooms. Maybe the only distinct narrative element here is that the people of colour cast in this movie predominantly play villains, which sounds tempting to chalk up to the dearth of good roles for minority actors at the time. But then you realize that by virtue of playing bad guys, they have hints of personality traits or at least distinguishing qualities, so maybe it’s a win for representation after all. I’m sure somebody somewhere has written about racial dynamics in Mikels’ work, and I”m sure it’s a lot more interesting a read than sitting through this movie.

Now, one of the reasons I watched this is for the presence of Tura Satana, who was so memorable in Russ Meyer’s Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! And watching this movie, you realize what a crime against cinema it was that Satana and Meyer never worked together again, because whatever reasons they had for not reuniting, Mikels does not have the same strengths in directing actors as Meyer. Not just in a pure visual sense, in that Meyer knew how to shoot her for maximum oomph, but that he brought out a certain forcefulness in her presence. (”You won’t find it down there, Columbus!”) She gets in a few good sneers, but for the most part is disappointingly understated here, with the only interesting part of her presence being that she wears a bright pink dress in some scenes and a bright green dress in others, singledhandedly doing more to broaden the movie’s colour palette than anybody else in the movie.

The other reason I watched this can be inferred from the title. There’s a pretty great Misfits song that takes its title from this movie, and if you listen to some of the lyrics, they suggest something pretty epic:

With just a touch of my burning hand I send my astro zombies to rape the land Prime directive, exterminate The whole human race And your face drops in a pile of flesh And then your heart, heart pounds Till it pumps in death Prime directive, exterminate Whatever stands left

Now look at the title more closely. I stressed the importance earlier of distinguishing the singular from the plural, and I’ll do so again. Astro-Zombies. With an S. Which is just egregious false advertising, because for most of the movie, there’s just one astro-zombie. (A second one is present in the final scene, but hasn’t been awakened.) Even worse, if you looked at the poster and thought it would at least look cool, I regret to inform you that it’s just a guy in a brown jacket with a shitty mask, and that he’s not onscreen for like ninety percent of the movie. So, even on the bare minimum level that garbage like this is supposed to deliver, the movie drops the ball. Towards the end, the astro-zombie does run around holding a flashlight to his head like a kid pretending to be a unicorn, and does lop off some poor sucker’s head (like Satana’s dresses, the bloodletting at least adds to the colour palette). But by then it’s too little, too late.

[theshadowbastard]

The True Nature of Quincey Morris

Dracula, being an epistolary novel, invites the reader to infer the structure of the plot and the way events unfold based on the evidence presented through the various documents (letters, diaries, news clippings, etc). As a result of this, it's pretty easy to start picking up on any loose threads in the narrative and weaving them into complex theories about the story and particularly the characters.

Quincey Morris, Official Cowboy (TM), is one of the least-represented characters from the novel in various screen and stage adaptations. And that's understandable, because on the surface he doesn't seem to be around much or have much of an impact on the plot. Or does he?

Full disclaimer--this is full-out tinfoil hat conspiracy territory, and I fully acknowledge that I am almost certainly reading more into the text than Stoker ever intended, but this is one of my favorite books, and Dracula Daily is not the first time I've had these thoughts, and since today the Texan returns to the plot in a major way, I felt like now would be the best time to bring this up. For I have a few thoughts about Quincey--to begin with, where has he been all this time? I don't think we've seen him at all since his proposal to Lucy, and if we have it hasn't been very noticeable. He shows up to ask Lucy to marry him, and then disappears for chapters' worth of text, then reappears suddenly, just after the Count's big attack on Lucy? Coincidence? And don't forget, he's the first person to mention the word "vampire" in the story. Granted, he's referring to an incident with a bat killing a horse, but still, he certainly seems more aware than anyone except perhaps Van Helsing that there is something monstrous going on, as evidence by the fact that, instead of staying by Lucy's side, he patrols the grounds outside. And I also find it interesting that, while Arthur, Jack, and the Professor all were able to give their blood to Lucy and she seemed to recover well, after Quincey's donation, she does not recover; indeed she seems to grow worse. This could of course be the result of the oft-discussed lack of knowledge of blood types at the time the story takes place, and Quincey's might simply be incompatible, but all the same I can't help but find it significant.

So what does all this mean? Is there more to Quincey Morris than meets the eye? Does he have some ulterior motive we're not made aware of? Is he perhaps in league with Dracula? That would explain his absence, and why he would seem to know more about vampires than the other characters (again, except Van Helsing), and why his blood seems to be bad for Lucy. Or maybe he's an enemy of Dracula? His knowledge of vampires might indicate that he's some kind of Cowboy Vampire Hunter, who's been hunting the Count in the background while Lucy has been preyed upon. Or strangest of all--could he be a vampire himself, perhaps a rival of Dracula? This is one of the more common theories about Quincey Morris, and much of the evidence for it will come later in the story so I won't spoil here, but let's just say that the fact that it is his blood that causes Lucy to get worse is perhaps highly significant.

Of course, this is all probably nonsense. Stoker just forgot about Quincey, or couldn't find anything for him to do, and somebody had to drop the V-word at some point so it might as well be him. Besides, he's Texan, so of course he's always packing heat, and that's why he patrolled the grounds and wouldn't be in the house to watch over Lucy. And I'm sure it's just Stoker's oversight that we never get any kind of backstory about him. Yes. I'm sure that's all there is to it.

[wraithsoutlaws]

Babygirl, you are strange and off-putting. ( Template by @arcandoria )

- DUM DUM: Not many people look at Dagger and see somebody worth knowing, but something strange clicked between these two and the rest is history. When you see them at each other’s side, you’d do best to keep walking. They have a morbid idea of romance, and it typically involves a lot of blood. 

- CASEY “V” VEGAS: Hard to believe these two are blood related. Orphans at a young age, their paths diverged quickly, but that doesn’t mean they lost that brotherly bond. V might just be the last bit of humanity Dagger has left. Not much contact between the two anymore, but word has it a fellow Raffen took a shot at the merc once and wound up hanging from fishing wire until he was mincemeat for that rat to chew on. Safe to say Dagger’s still looking out for his baby brother.

- SIMON “ROYCE” RANDALL: He let Dagger into the borg’s den but that doesn’t mean he likes him. By all accounts, the feeling is mutual. Apparently you can hear these two bitching over that noise they call music in Totentanz. Guess maybe the only reason Royce hasn’t killed him yet is because he’s the only one stupid enough to spit in his face. Under all that animosity there might be a sliver of respect. Or maybe he’s just lucky to have Dum Dum there to clean up his mess. Either way, don’t expect these two to work it out anytime soon. There’s an explosion brewing and when it blows, it’s gonna be ugly.

- NASH BANE: Even fellow Wraiths can’t stand Dagger, least of all their former leader. Dagger never gave him a choice to argue when he waltzed into their organization carrying a bag of severed heads and declared himself king. Nobody else piped up either. Go figure. Whatever power struggle existed between them, it didn’t last long. If Nash hadn’t gotten himself zeroed in that ambush, it’s a fair bet Dagger would’ve done the honors with a smile.

- PANAM PALMER: Now this is where it gets interesting. On paper these two are bitter rivals, but neither one of them will pull the trigger on the other. Could be their mutual connection through the merc known as V, but Dagger seems to have a healthy respect for the fiery Aldecaldo. Rumor has it he even tried to recruit her to his side of the fence. Yeah, it went over as well as you could imagine, but as long as V is alive and kicking, they’re both on each other’s Do Not Fuck With list.

- SAUL BRIGHT: A rivalry for the ages. Leaders with no respect for the other’s game. As long as the ‘caldos stake camp in the Badlands, these two exist in a perpetual game of Tug o’ War. Anyone can see that Dagger takes special joy in tormenting Saul, and he certainly doesn’t make it easy for the patriarch. Saul can attest for this monstrosity personally after spending a few days locked up in a Wraith basement with the man himself. If Dagger had it his way, he never would’ve made it out alive.

- ROGUE AMENDIARES: Hard to find someone who will extend a hand, but Rogue knows an asset when she sees one, and Dagger always delivers results. It’s not often the two will work together, but he’s surprisingly true to his word by all accounts. She may not like him. She won’t allow him to step foot into the Afterlife, but when there’s a job nobody else will take on, his number is the first to be called.

[fantastic-bby]

SKZ vs. their crush

Pairing: Gender neutral Reader x Member

Word count: 3.9k

Genre: Fluff

Summary: It’s just them crushing on you 

Warnings: -

Masterlist

A/n: I tried a different format this time and used bullet points rather than just making it like a full story since my brain was going crazy when I wrote this. Let me know which format you prefer and maybe I might incorporate both bullet points and the essay ones since I actually quite enjoy writing using both.

Chan

You guys only met because you knew Jeongin 

The tiny babie brought you to meet his friends 

Chan was smitten when he first met you 

He thought you were so pretty when he saw you following behind Jeongin 

“Innie,” 

“Yeah?”

“Who is that?” 

He wants Jeongin to introduce you two

Sensing the vibes, the maknae is more than happy to introduce you two 

if he was being honest, he already knew Chan would pretty much fall in love with you immediately

Chan’s flustered when he introduces himself to you 

He’s almost blubbering all over the place 

You find it kinda cute but he’s scared you found him really weird 

He tries to steal little moments to be with you 

Like ‘accidentally’ bumping into you in the hallway 

Or how he just so happens to walk into Jeongin’s room when you’re on a call with him

Or how he just so happens to be lingering around the flea market nearby your college campus 

Chan takes care of you without even realising it 

If you bump into each other he asks whether you’ve eaten or how your day is 

He loves the way you seem to parent his friends like he does 

“Jisung, put the knife down. You’re going to hurt somebody” 

“Hehe, make me” 

“PUT IT DOWN 〴⋋_⋌〵” 

Chan’s surprised he listens to you

He loves how everyone only seems to listen if you’re the one talking too

If you’re hanging out with them at the dorms and Chan can’t seem to control everyone, you just step in 

“Guys, please”

And suddenly the chaos has calmed down 

Chan finds it amazing 

Everyone just… stops when you ask them to

You find it amusing 

It’s like watching a single dad trying to control his seven wild sons

He chases after Felix around the dorm a lot because he’s usually done something weird with Minho and Jisung

He manages to get your number using an excuse of needing you to calm down the boys 

“Please… they don’t listen sometimes” 

Jeongin finds reasons to push you two together 

“Yay! You guys made—oH nO I ComPleTeLy foRgoT!!”

Leaves the two of you alone 

He honestly just thinks you two should get together and so does the rest of the group

So they find excuses to get you two alone together 

But your relationship takes f o r e v e r  

Only because Chan wants to be absolutely certain that he likes you

He doesn’t want to commit to someone he’s worried he’s not sure of yet

Slowly but surely, he starts to ease into the relationship

He sends you music he thinks you’ll like 

Eventually he’ll start sending you his own music 

He only confesses when he’s absolutely sure he’s pretty much falling in love with you 

The way he does it just wins your heart immediately if you weren’t already as whipped for him as he was 

He writes a song for you (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `)♡ 

Minho

Bumped into you at a dance studio he goes to often

He thinks your dancing is amazing 

At first he doesn’t want to bother you 

But then he’s all like “heyyyy I’m Minho” 

And you’re pretty much taken away by how gorgeous the man is 

Minho wouldn’t be too flustered 

He would keep his cool around you 

Doesn’t mean he wouldn’t try to impress you with his sexy dance moves 

Tries to win your heart the romantic way which doesn’t work because half the time you’re too busy dancing to actually realise he’s trying to flirt with you

“Hey, baby ;)” 

“Huh?”

“Nothing”

Wonders whether he should just make a dedicated advance towards you 

He likes your humour 

It’s similar to his 

You both just laugh at really weird stuff together 

When you share your numbers, he sends you weird videos that he thinks you’ll like 

Minho’s not much of a texter, but when you do get a message from him, it’s either something he’s really excited about or something really weird 

Only realises he’s actually crushing on you when Changbin points it out 

“Why are you so nice to them” 

“Who?” 

“(Y/n)” 

Then Minho realises that he really likes you

Starts slowly working harder to win your heart 

Helps you with your dancing

“Your body looks a bit stiff” 

Buys you lunch 

“I got you the lunch box from 7 11”

It’s always something you end up liking if you hadn’t tried it before

Buys you drinks from the vending machine 

“What is this???” 

It looks like a double shot coffee 

“Energy?”

Minho doesn’t know either but you both drink it anyway 

And end up being at the studio until 3 a.m. because you’re both so hyped with caffeine

Offers to walk you home if it’s getting late

“It’s not safe on your own”

“Minho, I’ll be fineeeee” 

Doesn’t take no for an answer and forces you to let him

His advances work

You’re pretty much whipped for him by the time he confesses 

Which Minho does by buying you flowers and bringing it to the studio 

Changbin

You work at the music shop that he goes to often 

When he’s browsing the CD’s and the vinyls, he spots you at the counter 

His heart almost explodes when he sees you 

The first thing that caught his eye was the way you were dressed 

:0 

Fits Changbin’s style 

He’s nervous to approach you with the vinyl in his hand 

Why was he so nervous? 

Oh right, he was pretty much completely smitten by you 

“Hi!” 

 He loves your voice even more

“H-Hey,”

Changbin’s so nervous 

He likes your bracelets too 

He thinks they’re really cool 

He ends up coming back a lot and you wonder why this man needs so many CD’s and vinyls 

Eventually, he builds up the courage to talk to you

Changbin comes by every once in a while just to say hi 

Sometimes he just comes in to talk to you during your break

You tell him you’ve always wanted to try making music

He tells you he makes music 

You’re all :0 

Changbin tells you about it 

And you get really interested in his music 

He starts coming after your shift or during your break to play you his songs 

He gets all uwu when he sees the way your eyes shine 

You have him wrapped around your finger without even knowing it 

Doesn’t admit that he’s pretty much whipped 

Even though he visits you almost every other day 

And how he buys you your favourite snacks 

Or how he stays way longer than he expected to just bcs he’s talking to you 

You’re just as whipped tbh 

You love talking to Changbin 

You like his music taste and he’s fun to be around 

Confesses to you by taking you out on a date 

He brings you to his studio 

Shows you how he makes music 

He finds it adorable how you’re so amazed by his equipment

So he teaches you whatever he can in the time you’re together 

You both spend the evening just messing around 

You make a short track that you’re sure sounds really off

Changbin reassures you that it’s nice 

He teaches you how to layer the different tracks 

And eventually teaches you how to edit them despite the few hours you have 

You’re so excited 

He smiles every time he looks at you 

Bcs you’re so adorable he feels like he might burst 

Confesses at the end of the night 

“I like you a lot” 

He blurts it out and it catches you slightly off guard 

But you like him back so it’s fine 

Ends up offering to take you to the studio anytime you’re both free

Hyunjin 

Met you through Felix 

Felix invited you to play a game with him and his friends 

Hyunjin hears your voice the first time and he’s already curious 

He thinks you’re really chill and he likes your vibe 

You end up playing more games with them 

He ends up wanting to get to know you more 

The thing that honestly gets to him the most is the way you take every loss so lightheartedly 

“There’s always another game” 

You don’t rage or stress out over it 

Over time, he starts spending one-on-one time with you 

Until you’re both just doing literally anything else but gaming together 

He denies them as dates whenever his friends ask, claiming that it’s just friend time

Until one night you’re both awake at four a.m. and talking about everything and anything 

He likes the way you think

“Hyunjin, did you know that sometimes in movies, they use trash cans to replicate tiger roars” 

“What???”

He likes how you’re joking talking about starting a revolution 

He knows you won’t

“So, yeah, fuck capitalism!” 

“Yeah!” 

He loves the fact that you’re so open about what you think even if it’s something small or weird

“Mercy’s ass is so thick… for what reason…” 

“She’s a video game character??” 

“Felix, her ass is so thick, she could kill someone with it” 

Hyunjin loves hearing you rant about your day 

“And?? It’s so stupid!!”

“Calm down, (Y/n)”

“Don’t tell me to calm down, you egg!” 

Hyunjin thinks you’re adorable when you’re all riled up

He finds it amusing because he likes hearing you talk 

“You live there too?” 

He didn’t expect to be so close to you

“Yeah, that’s how I met Felix” 

He never realised you and Felix knew each other in real life

You spend more time together 

Talking about whatever comes to mind until the dead of night 

Sometimes you watch movies together 

You stay away from horror movies because he doesn’t like it that much 

But you’re always talking about something with him

The two of you are always the last to leave the call because you end up talking after games 

Hyunjin asks you out without even realising it sounds like a date

“Is that a date??” 

“Sure” 

He didn’t even realise he asked you out until after he’s left the call

?!?!?!?!

Goes into panic mode 

He just asked you out!!!! 

Starts asking Felix about you

He laughs at Hyunjin but helps him anyway

Shows him what you look like on your Instagram 

Hyunjin thinks you’re so pretty on your posts

When he sees you in person for the first time 

He’s so taken away 

You’re gorgeous

Whatever feeling he didn’t realise he had for you comes rushing in 

Hyunjin loves your laugh 

You spend the whole day together just walking around town

It’s nice to hear his voice when it isn’t coming out of your headphones

By the time the date’s over, Hyunjin wants more of you 

So he tells you he wants to take you out again while he’s walking you home 

You accept 

He turns to you with a c: before asking if he can kiss you

Jisung 

You’re a barista at the cafe nearby the JYPe building 

Jisung was designated as the drink buyer that time by the rest of his group 

If he was having trouble remembering all their orders before 

He has even bigger trouble now when he sees you 

YOU LOOK SO CUTE IN YOUR APRON 

He freezes the moment he sees you at the cashier 

“Hi! What would you like?” 

Jisung’s eyes go ◑.◑

“Uhm… sir?” 

“Sorry!” 

He struggles to get his order out properly

But you’re patient with him and even though he barely knows you 

He likes that you are 

Jisung’s watching you the entire time you make his order 

He can’t take his eyes off of you 

You do notice it, but you find him adorable so you don’t say anything 

He seems to be easily flustered

When you hand him his order, he’s still a blubbering mess 

“T-Thank you…” 

Your name tag says (Y/n) 

So he thanks you using your name which you smile 

“Have a great day!” 

Jisung comes back the next day 

He doesn’t even need any drinks, he just wants to see you again 

When he does, he feels all fluttery on the inside 

“Welcome back” 

He orders a dark chocolate smoothie and an iced mocha for Minho

Minho would kill him if he found out Jisung went to the cafe without him 

Jisung sits at an empty table and watches you again 

The next day, the cycle repeats 

And the day after that 

And the day after that 

Minho follows him at some point, wondering why Jisung seems to obsessed with the place 

“Why do you like this place so much?” 

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT”

Something’s definitely up with him 

Minho only finds out when he sees the way Jisung’s face seems to light up when he sees you 

“You like the barista, don’t you” 

“WHAT BARISTA ಠoಠ” 

That’s all he needs to confirm it 

Minho lets Jisung order, seeing just how excited and giddy he is when he’s talking to you 

Jisung’s practically bouncing up and down while you talk to him 

When they leave, Minho’s all up in it 

“You really like them, huh” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about >:c” 

Knowing Jisung, he wouldn’t do anything about it 

So Minho takes it into his own hands to bring you two together 

The group is having a mini event and they need someone to serve drinks 

Who else to ask other than you? 

Jisung’s eyes almost bulge out of his skull when he sees you because 

What are you doing here???? 

He’s so nervous 

Minho practically shoves him your way 

Again, you find him so cute that you don’t even realise he’s practically dying to know you more 

“Hi Jisung!” 

You learned his name over the course of him constantly coming back and Jisung just loves hearing it from you 

“Hi (Y/n)” 

“I can’t make anything ice blended, but I can trade if for an iced dark chocolate” 

“Okay!” 

As long as you make it, he’ll take it 

The event comes to an end but Jisung’s pretty much spent more time with you rather than his group mates 

Even they’re amused by how into you he obviously is 

“Hey Jisung” 

You stop him before you leave and he’s immediately at your side 

“Since you keep coming over, here’s my number” 

◑.◑

“Give me a call before you come in so that I can have your drink ready for you to pick up” 

He’s so happy :D

He sends you pictures of cute animals and random snippets of his music 

Felix 

Met you through League of Legends

You have good synergy so you became friends through that 

At first, he only managed to play with you occasionally 

When he’s able to, he notices how you always sound so bright 

“Hi Felix!” 

He likes playing with you 

You’re laid-back 

You don’t stress over losses too much 

“Ah, what to do?” 

But when you’re irritated, Felix finds it funny

“Fucking asshole!” 

“You were in the way, (Y/n)”

“Shut the fuck up!” 

You’re so funny to him 

“Felix, don’t go into bush” 

“I can bait them” 

“DON’T”

His character dies

“Oops ( ͡° ͜V ͡°)”

“-`д´-” 

You’re easy to game with and that’s what he admires the most right off the bat 

You always seem to be up for games 

Even when he’s not able to play, whenever he logs into Discord he sees you’re online 

Wonders whether you sleep at all 

“I don’t need sleep. I am gamerrrr. Gamers don’t sleep” 

“Please sleep” 

“Lix, sleep is for the weak and I’m not weak” 

“You passed out last night in call” 

Honestly slightly concerned for you 

Overtime he realises that he really looks forward to games with you

Before Felix would just go to sleep after practice or shows 

But he’ll start waiting to see if you’re up for even one game 

Which you always are 

Slowly starts spending time with you just talking 

Eventually it leads to the both of you staying up until 5 a.m. laughing at really stupid memes 

During the day when Felix can’t join call 

He sends you funny tiktoks and memes 

You appreciate it because you like him 

But you don’t admit it because you’ve never met him in person before

Until you both find out that you live only a few hours away from him 

Invites you down to Seoul to spend time with him 

You’re nervous

Felix is nervous

He knows what you look like

You exchanged Snapchats and started streaking a while before 

He sends you funny pictures of his members 

You send him selfies with random filters

But nothing could prepare him for when you appear from around the corner 

He sees you appear and he’s all (゜ロ゜)

Your photos don’t do your natural beauty any justice

Is a bit of a mess when you’re walking around together 

Eventually loosens up around you 

Compliments you a lot and it makes you blush 

You spend the day just wandering around the place 

Felix takes you to his favourite places and favourite cafes 

He wants to share his favourite things with you 

You find it endearing 

Tries to make you laugh a lot because he’s just grown to really like the sound of your voice 

Since you’ve spent most of your time talking over call

Felix just loves hearing your voice 

When the day’s over 

He asks for more nights that aren’t just filled with games because owo he wants to do more with you 

Seungmin

Bumped into you at JYPe because you were visiting a friend 

Hears you singing with Yeji and he immediately falls in love with your voice 

He peeks into the dance studio to see the two of you just sitting on the floor together 

There’s no music 

It’s just the two of you singing together 

Your voice makes him :D 

Seungmin leaves the two of you bcs he doesn’t want to intrude 

But he ends up seeing you more often 

Turns out you’re in Seoul for a while so you’re spending quite some time with Yeji 

He sees you in the hallways a lot

When you walk past each other, it’s always just a polite bow 

You don’t really think much of Seungmin other than the fact that you think he’s pretty handsome 

Yeji teases you for that 

When you’re walking through the building to look for her 

You hear someone singing in one of the rooms 

You peek through the glass 

It’s Seungmin! 

ಠoಠ

And he’s so good

You listen from outside the door 

You knew he was good since he was an idol

But you didn’t think that he was that good

You don’t even realise he’s done when the door swings open and you’re standing there 

When Seungmin sees you, he realises you were most likely listening 

Now you’re just staring at each other like 

(ﾟωﾟ;)

Because now he knows you were listening 

And now you know he knows 

“Uhm…” 

You’re embarrassed 

You’re lucky Yeji pops from around the corner and your eyes plead for her to drag you away 

Which she doesn’t 

“Sunbaenim!”

“Hi Yeji” 

“Have you met (Y/n) before?” 

You actually want to tear her apart

“Not properly, no” 

“Well... “ 

“WELL WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE TIME” 

You drag her away before she can say anything else 

The next time you see Seungmin 

You pass by him in the hallway once again while you’re looking for Yeji

“(Y/n)” 

ಠ_ಠ

“We keep passing each other but we’ve yet to actually meet each other properly” 

“Haha…” 

“I know you were listening the other day” 

“Haaahhhhhhaaaa…”

“I don’t mind that you did.”

“Huh” 

You’re actually bit surprised that he doesn’t mind

“I overheard you and Yeji singing the other day in the dance room” 

༼ : ౦ ‸ ౦ : ༽

“You sing really beautifully, (Y/n)” 

There’s an awkward wall that takes a while before you two actually break it down 

But when you do 

It’s almost like you visit the building to see Seungmin rather than Yeji 

She doesn’t mind since she saw it coming 

Doesn’t mean she can’t tease you about it 

Seungmin looks forward to having lunch with you in the cafeteria 

At this point, the staff don’t even question your now daily appearance 

You end up falling for Seungmin way faster than you thought possible 

The feeling’s mutual 

He just likes everything about you 

You’re so sweet 

You’re also really caring 

He notices that when you follow him to the practice room where Stray Kids are 

Changbin trips over Hyunjin’s legs 

You’re rushing over to help without any of them really realising it 

He loves how nice your voice is too 

“Can you sing for me?”

You’re shook 

You wonder why he wants to hear your voice specifically

“Your voice is just really nice 

He realises he really likes you when you briefly disturb their practice to give Seungmin lunch 

He briefly mentioned that he forgot his wallet and his lunch 

Since you aren’t an idol or staff

You had to use your own money in the cafeteria 

Seungmin’s heart flips at the realisation 

Ends up asking you out so that you don’t have to spend so much time inside the JYPe building all the time 

Jeongin 

Meets you through Changbin 

You went to the same high school as him and you kinda just stuck around

Changbin brings you to the dorm bcs he borrowed a hoodie 

The entire dorm greets you really brightly 

Jeongin’s the only one just watching in awe 

He’s so shy when you wave at him 

Seungmin notices and raises a brow 

“I-I’m Jeongin” 

“Hi Jeongin! Changbin talks about you guys a lot” 

He’s so nervous 

He wants to know you more, but he also doesn’t want to make it obvious that he’s taking interest in you 

The others don’t really notice because they’re too excited by the new person 

Seungmin, on the other hand, tells Changbin about it 

Changbin now makes it his mission to bring you two together 

He brings you over to the dorm more often 

Especially if Jeongin’s the only one home 

“(Y/n), you’ve met Innie before right?”

You nod

Jeongin’s adorable 

Changbin ends up bringing you over for movie nights 

Now you’re just an honorary member of the group 

Everyone else loves you 

Jeongin always tries to sit next to you during movie nights 

Especially if it’s a horror movie 

When you get scared, you hug his arm and he likes that 

Makes him feel like he’s able to protect you like a big strong man ᕙ(`▽´)ᕗ

You kinda like him too

So you test the waters around him 

You start talking to him more since Changbin told you he’s really shy 

Jeongin slowly eases into your company 

It takes a bit of time, but he’s started getting more confident around you 

You visit the dorm thinking Changbin’s there because he stole your favourite belt 

When Jeongin opens the door he’s all :D but when you ask where his hyung is he goes D: 

Tells you he’s not home but lets you in anyway 

No one else is home except for Jeongin and Chan 

So you sit in the living room with Innie 

You start talking about random things 

You end up talking about almost everything because it turns out that Changbin’s gone way longer than both of you thought 

Chan eventually emerges from his bedroom and waves at you 

He orders fried chicken for you guys 

You and Jeongin continue talking while eating 

Chan finds it super cute

Jeongin’s playful around you 

But he doesn’t want to make himself appear immature 

But you like when he’s being playful so you slowly ease him into being more comfortable 

He still just wants to impress you so you like him back 

Wait, when did he start liking you??? 

He realised it when you were over for a regular movie night 

You fell asleep in his lap 

Jeongin thought you were so cute 

When you wake up he asks you out 

You accept 

He cuddles you for the rest of the night and asks you to spend the night at the dorm

[earlgreytea68]

Heyyyyyy, I bet you were DYING to know stuff about that Google v. Oracle decision, huh?

You may have heard recently about a big deal Supreme Court decision called Google v. Oracle, a litigation that has dragged on for many, many, many years and focuses on Google having copied some pieces of computer programming owned by Oracle and known as APIs. Most of the write-ups I’ve seen about it have focused on its enormous repercussions for the technology sector, which makes sense since it’s a case about computer programming and APIs and other tech-y things.

But the thing about the decision is that it’s a fair use decision. The Supreme Court could have found that the APIs weren’t even protected by copyright. But instead, the Supreme Court used the doctrine of fair use, and this means that the case potentially has ramifications for all fair use situations, including fanfiction!

So, if you don’t know, fair use is a main defense to copyright infringement. Basically, you can use somebody else’s copyrighted work without their permission as long as what you’re doing with it is considered a “fair use.” E.g., you can write a story in somebody else’s fictional universe or draw art of somebody else’s fictional copyrighted characters without their permission as long as your use is a “fair use.”

“What’s a fair use?” is an incredibly complicated question. The long and tortured history of Google v. Oracle illustrates this: a jury found Google’s use was a fair use; an appellate court found that it wasn’t and basically said the jury was wrong; and now the Supreme Court says no, no, the jury was right and the appellate court was wrong. Like, this is not unusual, fair case rulings are historically full of disagreements over the same set of facts. All of the cases reiterate over and over that it’s a question that can’t really be simplified: every fair use depends on the particular circumstances of that use. So, in a way, Google v. Oracle, like every fair use case, is a very specific story about a very specific situation where Google used very specific APIs in a very specific way.

However, while every fair use case is always its own special thing, they all always debate the same four fair use factors (these are written into the law itself as being the bare minimum of what should be considered), and especially what’s known as the first and fourth factors. The first factor is formally “the purpose and character of the alleged fair use,” although over the decades of fair use jurisprudence this has come to be shorthanded as “transformativeness,” and the fourth factor is “effect on the market.”

Most of the energy and verve of a fair use case is usually in the transformativeness analysis; the more transformative your use is, the more likely it is to be fair (this is why AO3’s parent organization is called the Organization for *Transformative* Works – “transformative” is a term of art in copyright law). To “transform” a work, btw, for purposes of copyright fair use doesn’t necessarily mean that you have edited the work somehow; you can copy a work verbatim and still be found transformative if you have added some new commentary to it by placing it in a new context (Google Image Search thumbnails, while being exact reproductions of the image in question, have been found to be fair use because they’re recontextualizing the images for the different purpose of search results). The point is, transformativeness is, like fair use itself, built to be flexible.

Why? Because the purpose of copyright is to promote creativity, and sometimes we promote creativity by giving people a copyright, but sometimes giving someone a copyright that would block someone else’s use is the opposite of promoting creativity; that’s why we need fair use, for THAT, for when letting the copyright holder block the use would cause more harm to the general creative progress than good. Google v. Oracle recommits U.S. copyright to the idea that all this is not about protecting the profits of the copyright monopolist; we need to make sure that copyright functions to keep our society full of as much creativity as possible. Google copied Oracle’s APIs to make new things: create new products, better smartphones, a platform for other programmers to jump in and give us even more new functionality. The APIs themselves were created used preexisting stuff in the first place, so it’s not like anyone was working in a vacuum with a wholly original work. And, in fact, executives had thought that, the more people they could get using the programming, the better off they would be.

Which brings us to the fourth fair use factor, effect on the market (meaning the copyright holder’s market and ability to reap profits from the original work). There’s a lot of tech stuff going on in this part of the opinion but one of the points I find interesting from that discussion is that the court thought that Google’s use of the APIs was not a market substitute for the original programming, meaning that Google used the APIs “on very different devices,” an entirely new mobile platform that was “a very different type of product.”

But also. What I find most interesting in this part is the court’s explicit acknowledgment that sometimes things are good because they are superior, and sometimes things are good because people “are just used to it. They have already learned how to work with it.” Now, this obviously has special resonance in the tech industry (is your smartphone good because it’s the best it could be, or because you’re just really used to the way it’s set up?), but there’s also something interesting being said here about how not all of the value of a copyrighted work belongs *to the copyright holder* but comes *from consumers.* Forgive the long quote but I think the Court’s words are important here:

“This source of Android’s profitability has much to do with third parties’ (say, programmers’) investment in Sun Java programs. It has correspondingly less to do with Sun’s investment in creating the Sun Java API. . . . [G]iven programmers’ investment in learning the Sun Java API, to allow enforcement of Oracle’s copyright here would risk harm to the public. . . . [A]llowing enforcement here would make of the Sun Java API’s declaring code a lock limiting the future creativity of new programs. Oracle alone would hold the key. The result could well prove highly profitable to Oracle . . . . But those profits could well flow from creative improvements, new applications, and new uses developed by users who have learned to work with that interface. To that extent, the lock would interfere with, not further, copyright’s basic creativity objectives.”

This is picking up on reasoning in some older computer cases (like Lotus v. Borland, a First Circuit case from decades ago), but I think it’s so important we got this in a Supreme Court case: if WE bring some value to the copyrighted work through our investment in it, why should the copyright holder get to collect ALL the rewards by locking up further creativity involving that work? Which, incidentally, the Court explicitly notes is to the public detriment because more creativity is good for the public? This is such an important idea to the Supreme Court’s reasoning here that it’s the first part of the fair use test that it decides: that the value of the work at issue here “in significant part derives from the value that those who do not hold copyrights . . . invest of their own time and effort . . . .”

This case is, as we say in the law, distinguishable from fanfiction and fanart. APIs are different from television shows, and this case is very much a decision about technology and computer programming and smartphones and how old law gets applied to new things. Like, fair use is an old doctrine dating from the early nineteenth-century, and here we are figuring out how to apply it to the Android mobile phone platform. That, in and of itself, is pretty cool, and it’s rightly what most of the articles you’ll see out there about this case are focusing on.

But this case isn’t just a technology case; it’s also a fair use case that places itself in the lineage of all the fair use cases we look at when we think about what makes a use fair. And, to that end, this has some interesting things to say, about how much value consumers bring to copyrighted works and where a copyright holder’s rights might have to acknowledge that; about the fact that there are in fact limits to how much a copyright holder can control when it comes to holding the “lock” to future creativity building on what came before; about what part of the market a copyright holder is entitled to and what it isn’t. Think about the analogy you could make here: Given the investment of fans in learning canon, which is what makes the creative work valuable in the first place, allowing enforcement against fanfic or fanart would allow the canon creators to have a lock limiting future creativity, which would be highly profitable to the original creator (or, let’s be real, to Disney lol), but wouldn’t further copyright’s goals of promoting creativity because it would stifle all of that creativity instead. And just like Google with the APIs, what fandom is doing is not a market substitute for the original work: they’re “very different products.”

This is not to say, like, ANYTHING GOES NOW. Like I said, fanfic and fanart are very different from APIs. Fictional works get more protection than a functional work like the APIs at issue in this case. And there’s still a whole thing about commercial vs. non-commercial in fair use analysis which I didn’t really touch here (but which obviously has limits, since it’s not like Google isn’t making tons of money, and their use was a fair use). But this decision could kind of remind a big media world that maybe had forgotten that the copyright monopoly they enjoy is supposed to have the point of encouraging creativity; we grant a copyright because we think people won’t create without a financial incentive. (Tbh, there’s a lot of doubt that that is actually a true thing to believe, given all the free fic and art that gets produced daily, but anyway, it’s what the law decided several centuries ago before the internet was a thing.) Copyright is a balance, between those who hold the copyright and the rest of us, and the rest of us aren’t just passive consumers, we have creative powers of our own, and we might also want to do some cool things. And this case sees that. None of us are starting in a creative vacuum, after all; we’re all in this playground together.

[marshmallowprotection]

Hello! Your posts are always so *chef kiss*

May i request V (with whoever else you may like) reacting to a really strong and built female MC? Like, she could most likely physically pick up any of RFA members if she really wanted to LMFAO

And maybe even throw in some angst of her feeling sad for not being as docile and cute as many other girls are?

Thank you, and have a good day/night!

V has never put a lot of thought into what he finds pleasing in a romantic partner.

It's not that he has no idea what he's interested in, it's more that he's open to the possibility of truly falling in love over time with the right person. He doesn't want to trap himself in a bubble. He would rather fall in love with somebody's heart than anything else. Give him time and a half to get to know you.

He isn't the kind of person who looks at face value! He's searching for substantial context... deeper meanings that nobody else might find... to him, love is like a puzzle. It's so much easier to figure out a puzzle with somebody by your side. But, the fun part is getting to discover all of the pieces that create the larger picture. 

If somebody is capable of seeing the good in him, and they're willing to stand by him despite how much work he knows he needs to put in himself, he knows he can always have faith in that person as much as he hopes they'll always have faith in him.

The only thing that matters to him at the end of the day is that you have a beautiful heart, and that heart shines through your soul. That's the same way you saw him, right? You saw the good underneath all the filth he thought he was buried under… and he learned how to love himself again thanks to your kindness. So, right off the bat, if you are in the line of thinking that he's thought once about you in a way that might make you feel insecure?

Don't.

He probably spent much more time focusing on all of his insecurities and faults than he could ever find in any other person.

After all, he always looks to himself when it comes to his flaws and insecurities, he never looks to another person in that way. That's one of those things he's trying to unlearn in the present, but it took him a long time to get to that point. 

Remember that it is your heart that allowed him the opportunity to properly look in the mirror and decide that he didn't like the person he was looking at, because that person was denying himself the opportunity to be who he wanted to be.

The one thing he admires about you the most is that you are the kind of person who doesn't hesitate to be compassionate. Sure, maybe the rest of the world looks at you and thinks that you don't have the capacity to be a sweet, kind, and gentle person.

But, that just means the world is a prejudiced place. It's a place that's denying you the opportunity to be yourself. You are allowed to live any way you want to live, and for anybody to tell you that you have to fit into a box to be a certain way deserves to be smacked. 

Just because you're strong physically does not mean you are not allowed to be gentle emotionally. You can have jacked muscles for days but also love to wear bright, frilly, and pink things. Nobody can tell you that you can't do something that makes you happy.

If it makes you happy to scoop up your friends and giggle, do it. Jihyun will look at you in awe because you are so wonderful. You are authentic to who you are and he never wants you to change. He never wants you to hold back because you're the person that taught him he should never hold back. 

If it makes you feel good to sweep him off his feet, go ahead and do it because he's not going to be the one to stop you. He's going to smile and lean into your embrace because who cares about filling any role that society expects out of you? No way! Don't even bother trying to be someone you aren't! None of that bullshit ideology matters when you're happy together. 

"My dearest darling, you are perfect just the way you are. You don't need to be docile... quiet... or even meek to be precious. I'd rather you be yourself... strong, compassionate, and unwavering. You are cute... no matter what any says. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and in my eyes, you are sweet, precious, and confident. Be yourself when you're with me... because I'm myself with you. Just because you're not "small or docile" all the time doesn't mean you can't be feminine. Femininity is a spectrum. You're wonderful, and I promise you anyone who thinks that you aren't doesn't deserve to know you."

[haikkun]

Kill The Rabbit

It is wear a halter tank-top when playing pool and never wear a v-necked shirt when scooping ice cream at work and it is a Lion King sunset over a concrete viaduct and it is someone taking a steak knife to your heart to check for “doneness”

It is the smell of lager and skin-so-soft and denim burnt to the knees and it is suckling Trixie Beldon books between migraines and mothy sheets and it is “mail my ashes to him, I meant it about the same grave” even though you know he’ll rinse them down the drain and

It is the exhaustion of never being bored and it’s cigarette sounds after the macaroni and cheese and it is the thorn in your paw and you were the lion AND the god and it is always being asked out by the friend of the guy you are chasing and it is being kissed while you are sleeping and it is Hanna-Barberian drawings of men making you think you have no interest

It is trying to look more bored when people peel out at intersections, and it’s being afraid that someone will reach around the back of your neck and find the zipper that you didn’t even know existed

It is “are you a cat person or a dog person?” And it turns out… you aren’t a person.

And it’s been “good answer” and it’s been “the hour of your death” and it is hating every. single. person. who “did a thing”

It’s been “it’s been’s” and it’s been “trying to be’s” and it’s been thinking I might read my shade between the lines and dreaming I could be anything worth writing about and I was already in love with you before you coup de grâced me like that and it’s saying your name under my breath when I don’t want to and FUCKING SCREAMING at myself to fuck off, and…

It is laying out on the grass and it occurring to me that the sun might actually be basking in us and it is thinking you are hot or cold when everything is relative to space dust and it is something dumb that happens when I’m in love

It’s people with “baby on board” stickers who also claim that “all lives matter” and it’s finding out “the sign” was merely “the driver” the whole time

It’s never being as dedicated as the Florida man who died in an explosion after attempting to microwave a microwave and it’s raise your hand if you raised your hand and

It is being so hungry for signs of life you track your own footsteps around the block and it is a multisyllabic mind that cannot cram into a 140 character Twitter count or a picture poem on Instagram and it is being tagged by my tumblr handle on platforms others stole my name on and not being able to receive any of the glory and I don’t do it for the claps but the lack is also the most efficient way to to get down on myself lately

And it’s taking shots while the kids you babysat napped and it’s the sensation of feeling watched all the time even thought nobody’s ever been looking, and it’s a pre-guilty look on your face driving past cops like you’ve been caught even though you haven’t done anything lately (well, that’s a lie) and I always wanted to be turned into my favorite tree when I die but I’m so bad at staying in one place and I’ve been thinking maybe I should be rammed into a firework instead and then I contemplate the cost-savings benefit between them, after all, it’s MY funeral and then people who loved me too little in life can get tattoos of the explosion, and it’s been clear I’ve been depriving myself of being truly beautiful because I haven’t given birth, and it’s being responsible for all of the plagues of the world because we were two people’s more swol halves and even at 50% I am responsible for one and a half persons that never made it to this earth, and it’s playing chicken with the lightning and hoping every single wave pulls you under or that something somewhere will take pity on the world and dispatch you and it’s realizing it would be easier to just stop feeding yourself but that’s different and unacceptable but what really is the difference and it’s finding out that pain is what’s art to somebody else and it’s comparing myself and coming up short and it’s leaving out half of everything since we met because I can’t lose you yet and

“It’s a circle…” she coughs. “You run as far and hard from death as you can that you don’t realized you’ve wrapped yourself back around again…” and it is not feeling qualified to be here, ever, and here is everywhere

____________________________

Maureen Armstrong @haikkun

[istumpysk]

Operation Stumpy Re-Read

AGOT: Eddard V (Chapter 25)

I’m so over you! Where’s Sansa?

"My pardons, Lord Eddard. You did not come to hear foolish meanderings of a summer forgotten before your father was born. Forgive an old man his wanderings, if you would. Minds are like swords, I do fear. The old ones go to rust. Ah, and here is our milk." The serving girl placed the tray between them, and Pycelle gave her a smile. "Sweet child." He lifted a cup, tasted, nodded. "Thank you. You may go."    

Grown men drinking milk, somebody write an essay.

+.+

He came to me one day asking after a certain book, as hale and healthy as ever, though it did seem to me that something was troubling him deeply. The next morning he was twisted over in pain, too sick to rise from bed.

No really, you’re doing a fantastic job of covering up this poisoning, Pycelle.

+.+

"I have heard that you sent Maester Colemon away."         

The Grand Maester's nod was as slow and deliberate as a glacier. "I did, and I fear the Lady Lysa will never forgive me that. Maybe I was wrong, but at the time I thought it best. Maester Colemon is like a son to me, and I yield to none in my esteem for his abilities, but he is young, and the young ofttimes do not comprehend the frailty of an older body. He was purging Lord Arryn with wasting potions and pepper juice, and I feared he might kill him."    

Of course purging would be the best thing to do when someone is poisoned. Gee, I wonder why Maester Colemon was sent away!

Also, who wants to bet with me Lysa Arryn wasn’t upset about it?

+.+

Just before he closed his eyes for the last time, he whispered something to the king and his lady wife, a blessing for his son. The seed is strong, he said.

Interesting choice. I would have gone with, “Your wife is fucking her brother.”

+.+

Ned took another swallow of milk, trying not to gag on the sweetness of it.

Haaaa.

+.+

"I have heard it said that poison is a woman's weapon."                 

Pycelle stroked his beard thoughtfully. "It is said. Women, cravens … and eunuchs."

DO IT, YOU EGG.

+.+

"One thing," Ned told him. "I should be curious to examine the book that you lent Jon the day before he fell ill."                 

"I fear you would find it of little interest," Pycelle said. "It was a ponderous tome by Grand Maester Malleon on the lineages of the great houses."

"Still, I should like to see it."                 

The old man opened the door. "As you wish. I have it here somewhere. When I find it, I shall have it sent to your chambers straightaway."

Dumbass, just say it was misplaced by Jon Arryn. God you’re so bad at this.

+.+

"One last question, if you would be so kind. You mentioned that the king was at Lord Arryn's bedside when he died. I wonder, was the queen with him?"     

"Why, no," Pycelle said. "She and the children were making the journey to Casterly Rock, in company with her father. Lord Tywin had brought a retinue to the city for the tourney on Prince Joffrey's name day, no doubt hoping to see his son Jaime win the champion's crown. In that he was sadly disappointed. It fell to me to send the queen word of Lord Arryn's sudden death. Never have I sent off a bird with a heavier heart."    

Ned! The Lannisters weren’t there, Ned! Ned, the Lannisters weren’t there! Ned!

(yes they could have hired someone and used this as an alibi but whatever)

+.+

When dawn broke over the city, the dark red blooms of dragon's breath surrounded the girls where they lay. "I dreamed of Bran," Sansa had whispered to him. "I saw him smiling."    

Someone tell me what this means... dawn, the dark red blooms of dragon’s breath, the girls.

+.+

“He was going to be a knight,” Arya was saying now. “A knight of the Kingsguard. Can he still be a knight?”

“No,” Ned said. He saw no use in lying to her. “Yet someday he may be the lord of a great holdfast and sit on the king’s council. He might raise castles like Brandon the Builder, or sail a ship across the Sunset Sea, or enter your mother’s Faith and become the High Septon.” But he will never run beside his wolf again, he thought with a sadness too deep for words, or lie with a woman, or hold his own son in his arms.

Arya cocked her head to one side. “Can I be a king’s councillor and build castles and become the High Septon?”

“You,” Ned said, kissing her lightly on the brow, “will marry a king and rule his castle, and your sons will be knights and princes and lords and, yes, perhaps even a High Septon.”

Arya screwed up her face. “No,” she said, “that’s Sansa.”

!!!!!

+.+

Littlefinger was perched on the window seat when Ned entered, watching the knights of the Kingsguard practice at swords in the yard below. "If only old Selmy's mind were as nimble as his blade," he said wistfully, "our council meetings would be a good deal livelier."    

A wise man might ask himself what Littlefinger is saying about him behind closed doors.

+.+

Littlefinger smiled. "I promised Cat I would help you in your inquiries, and so I have."     

He’s being way too informal with your wife, dude.

+.+

Ned frowned. "Would that I could. Lady Arryn took her household back to the Eyrie." Lysa had done him no favor in that regard. All those who had stood closest to her husband had gone with her when she fled: Jon's maester, his steward, the captain of his guard, his knights and retainers.    

Catelyn! Talk to your husband! Communicate! Share things!

"Lysa was never brave. When we were girls together, she would run and hide whenever she'd done something wrong. Perhaps she thought our lord father would forget to be wroth with her if he could not find her. It is no different now. She ran from King's Landing for fear, to the safest place she knows, and she sits on her mountain hoping everyone will forget her." - Catelyn III, ASOS

+.+

"What of him?"         

"He reports to Varys. The Spider has taken a great interest in you and all your doings." He shifted in the window seat. "Now glance at the wall. Farther west, above the stables. The guardsman leaning on the ramparts?"                 

Ned saw the man. "Another of the eunuch's whisperers?"

"No, this one belongs to the queen. Notice that he enjoys a fine view of the door to this tower, the better to note who calls on you. There are others, many unknown even to me. The Red Keep is full of eyes. Why do you think I hid Cat in a brothel?"    

A wise man might ask himself which spy belongs to Littlefinger.

+.+

"Scarcely," said Littlefinger. 

The words scarce and scarcely are used 221 times in this series, and believe me you notice it every single time.

+.+

"Lord Petyr," Ned called after him. "I … am grateful for your help. Perhaps I was wrong to distrust you."                 

Littlefinger fingered his small pointed beard. "You are slow to learn, Lord Eddard. Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed down off your horse."

Final thoughts:

Are we all on the same page here?

Lannister agent Maester Pycelle doesn’t know the details of what happened, but does know Jon Arryn knew the truth about twincest, so he let him die, and is now actively covering it up? (and doing a terrible job of it)

Yes? Thoughts?

-> return to menu <-

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

What’s your opinion for Leo’s reaction to finding out the mc was immortal as well- not necessarily a vampire, maybe they’re some other type of supernatural. I’m really curious because Leo seems like he’s mainly in love with the mc bec they are human.

Hi lovely!!! Always wonderful to see you, hope you’re well! 💛💛💛💛💛

Tbh I think my opinion remains the same about something like this? I'm going to link to an ask I wrote up a while ago, only because it's v pertinent to the subject matter and good background for what I’m going to expand on here.

That being said, I'm happy to kind of tl;dr/expand on what I talked about there. Basically I had the feeling that Leonardo choosing MC as a lover was more circumstantial--regarding the state of his life in the moment, regarding his general feelings about vampires and vampire society, and regarding his unresolved trauma as a young kid.

I guess my answer to that question--and forgive me if it seems like a cop out--is that it really depends, I feel? I think his attraction has a lot more to do with the kind of person somebody is, their sensibility, more than it has to do with mortal vs immortal. If it was an immortal MC that showed ridiculous fortitude and self-control, measured patience and maturity, I really don��t see him not noticing that? I think he would be wary at first (assuming it’s all a front) but with time would likely feel a great deal of love if they were interested in a life together. If they were able to see and understand what he needs and answered those needs, I guess I just really doubt his ability to say no. It’s all he’s really looking for, and the fact that he hasn’t found it after so long really speaks to his frightened evasiveness and the rare nature of that kind of unshakeable strength.

I also think a lot of his hinging away from purebloods (true immortals, in other words) is that he 100% does not want his familia having any involvement in his meaningful relationships. Which might be why he shows more acceptance towards turned vampires, or potentially different supernatural beings.

But I also don’t like giving a vague answer without some kind of explanation as to how I got, to that conclusion, so a boatload of analysis follows below the content warning.

Spoilers for Leonardo’s route and a few mentions of JPN ver content:

I think he has less of an obsession with the idea of mortality, and more like a constant association of goodness and freedom and maturity with humanity. And while it's understandable, there are signs that--when he has the proper time and space to heal--his views seem to soften from those extremes. I mean his decision to live with Comte is pretty much his first step in that direction; it was him acknowledging for the first time that vampires aren't inherently loathsome or incapable of normal living. (On a revealing note, I think it says a lot that he agrees with MC that she is living in a “wolves’ den” but also feels the need to clarify the men are basically the domesticated equivalent. They don’t pose the same threat other vampires typically do to humans because of their lifestyle and sire.) Additionally, his tsun-like behavior towards Comte also seems to solidify this concept for me: Leonardo’s trying to come to terms with something he's sworn to reject since he was young, but also can't entirely deny that Comte is as chill and mature as purebloods come lmao

[There was also an event in the JPN ver–which seems to be approaching the ENG version rapidly, though only the first part is here right now–in which Leonardo fully offers to turn her. MC is essentially on her death bed, and Leonardo doesn’t want to lose her after so little time together; it’s MC that rejects the future as a vampire out of sheer principle. Even more noteworthy is that, when a reincarnation of MC is reunited with Leonardo in modern times, he is revealed to be exceptionally shaken by that loss. There are suggestions he can’t take losing her again, which could mean succumbing to the desire to bite her.]

Two things I feel are necessary to hit home:

The first being that, at least within the storyline so far, the most mature and human-like vampires we’ve seen are Leonardo and Comte. They seek to emulate the maturity they see reflected in the human beings they’ve known all their lives. Given how vampire society and their hierarchies work, I get the feeling humans are nothing more than amusing tools to them--a way to survive and creatures to exercise control over. There’s an objectification and delusion that comes with what I’ve seen, and I think it’s important in this discussion? If the vast majority of vampires behave this way (because I’m ngl, Leonardo and Comte don’t seem very keen on remaining in touch with other vampires all that much) then it only makes sense they prefer the company of humans who can at least share this sensibility of “been there, done that--stop hurting people bc you’re bored/repressed, grow up.”

One event story where this was exceedingly evident was actually Leonardo’s proposal story. If y’all remember, an old pal/acquaintance of Leonardo’s finds out he’s gunning for a human woman and basically goes “lmao not on my watch.” His name was Adam iirc, and he felt he had every liberty to try and pressure Leonardo into turning MC. Failing that, he insisted they should break up and not be together anymore. Now, on the one hand, it’s fair to say that he was looking out for Leonardo in a way–he didn’t want him to end up miserable and alone when she was gone. But at the same time I feel that Adam’s behavior is deeply revealing of vampire society as well lmao. He doesn’t really try to understand the situation, just immediately assumes it’s the only appropriate outcome. It does insinuate a lowkey cultural disdain for humanity: they are imperfect, they do not last or cannot have real value without preservation. If Adam was really Leonardo’s friend, wouldn’t he realize that Leonardo considers vampirism nothing more than a burden that he would wish on no one, much less his future wife? Additionally, wouldn’t he also keep in mind that Leonardo considers human beings beautiful just as they are? Since he fails these basic requirements to understand Leonardo, my impression is that he is influenced by the larger vampire culture to some extent. Furthermore, it underscores just how thoroughly Leonardo has been trained to keep his cards close to his chest for fear of ridicule/violent reprisal: no vampires know his true feelings on the matter because he would be vehemently rejected outright.

[One can also offer that maybe Adam wasn’t being malicious, maybe vampires find human women they fall in love with all the time and turn them (or any other permutation of companionship that occurs), so he doesn’t understand why Leonardo wouldn’t. But even then, to try to force them to break up if she doesn’t turn? A bit overkill imo but also revealing--Leonardo’s will is being ignored for the sake of upholding a kind of ill-founded superiority complex lmao]

While Leonardo does have a somewhat overbearing need to control the pacing of his relationship and who sacrifices what, I don’t think it’s wrong to be cautious--to want to think things through. I think it’s fair to be afraid that the person you’re with can’t handle what you’ve seen/known. But that also leads me to a core issue I have with MC: she doesn’t inspire much confidence that she can handle the life he’s lived, and that’s a problem of both incapacity and incompatibility. I have to wonder how he reacts when he’s with somebody at the same maturity level, or at the very least somebody with whom he can see her strength with time. When MC’s life was dying out he was desperate enough to accept biting her because he didn’t want to lose her–human or not. It’s MC that rejects this solution, which leads me to further believe that he just doesn’t care about the divide when it comes down to it; it has more to do with his difficulty with being vulnerable and fully trusting someone to care about him. (Assuming they also have the fortitude to stay hopeful and relatively strong over the course of a very long life.)

In line with that, the second thing I think it’s important to acknowledge is how deeply hurt Leonardo is as a result of his family treating him like a fool/black sheep. He outright says and heavily insinuates that his family would write her off as worthless, that they’d never accept her--that's his first thought:

Leonardo: “My familia would call you frail. I think you’re strong and beautiful. You do more with your time than we try to do with ours.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MC: “And those letters were from your familia?”

Leonardo: “Yeah. I don’t talk to them or see them anymore. We don’t agree...on a lot of things.”

[Brief intermission here. But lmao. Who does that sound like? If any of you guessed Isaac, that’s exactly what I’m alluding to. Isaac says in his own route smth along the lines of “Why bother trying to get through to people when no amount of talking does any good or gets you any closer to being understood?” Which also explains the way they get along to uncanny degrees: they find comfort in making things/researching because it means being able to avoid the distress that comes with being blatantly misunderstood by others. Their pain simply comes in different dimensions; for Leo it’s about loss and hiding who he is out of fear of rejection, for Isaac it’s about betrayal and people turning on him--ultimately abandonment for both. But I digress, back to the main argument.]

Leonardo: “Once they discovered my location, they began hounding me with letters again. They don’t want me to be with just anyone...They want more purebloods. I’m no more than one half of an equation for them.”

There is a clear implication that his desire to choose somebody that truly makes him happy means jack shit to them. They keep talking over him and trying to wear him down to force him into what they want. It’s no wonder--imo--that he has such a hard time just saying what he wants in his life, to feel like he has the freedom to wish and pursue anything freely. It’s no wonder he just expects MC to spit on everything that’s important to him. It appears as though only other human beings in general and Comte have ever come close to understanding him.

At some point MC realizes that his insistence on being compagni provvisori was originally just another act of sacrifice, and that he was fine with giving up his time and a little privacy if it meant she would be safe. The thing she doesn’t seem to realize in the course of this--and he struggles to say it until later on--is that it stopped being blind generosity. He really did start to fall in love with her, and that’s the whole reason things became even more messy; because he didn’t anticipate not being able to let go on top of the vulnerability. And it’s a big part of why he’s hesitating to speak. He feels he has no right to those feelings, and that he’s imposing on her--not that he’ll be welcome.

And when she did finally admit those feelings were welcome, it was compounded by the parroted views of his family and larger vampire society as a whole. Saying that she herself wasn’t enough, that she had to become a vampire to make him happy. Imo that sounds very potentially retraumatizing given his experiences (people trying to force him into marriages with other vampires who didn’t remotely understand or care about him because it was “the right way of things”). It’s no wonder he freaks out and does something incredibly stupid and insensitive–which is pretty insanely ooc for him.

Leonardo: “...It shocked them. Quieted them down a bit. Hard to get peace when your familia is immortal. Grazie, cara mia.”

Leonardo: “You’re strong, and you’re kind. So probably you won’t cry while I’m here to see it. But when I’m not looking, you’ll cry. If I had done that to you (bitten her, in other words), you’d still be crying when I wasn’t watching... Maybe it’s selfish of me, after what I did, but I just wanted to make you happy. You always look pretty, cara mia, but your smile takes my breath away...It’s not your destiny to love someone who will only make you cry.”

This man literally cannot handle anyone deeply sad or in despair. He’s always going to try to cheer people up and care about them, but general tragedy/emotional discord affects him very powerfully--and it’s likely a reflection of what I’ve mentioned before. He can’t bear to see people feeling helpless or miserable because he’s just been there too many times to be able to cope. He wants to help and heal (even if he’s suffering from prolonged compassion fatigue), but he knows that his powers are limited--even if he is a pureblood.

And the thing is? While it’s misguided to believe she would cry alone when it comes to the context of healthy romantic love (bc the idea would be that you lean on each other when something upsetting happens) he has zero reference point. He was not born as a result of authentic love (his parents never married, he was the result of a procreative arrangement), his family talks over every wish and belief he has and they still claim it’s done out of love/honest concern for him. One can only imagine the serpentine and obnoxious lengths to which his family has deceived or tried to force him into reconnecting with them. Every person that ever did know him/care about him in a real way is gone. Love, for him, has only been a series of losses that left his heart hollowed out; I don’t really blame him for expecting further disappointment and isolation and exhaustion. 

He’s also not wrong in the sense that he partially saw MC do what he outlined, and it’s a big part about what he loves about her. When she was feeling alone and lost–powerless–all she did was shrug and move forward. That doesn’t make it hurt any less, but focusing on what you can do instead of what you can’t do is healthier. And they both have the tendency to hide when they’re in pain or feeling lost, all because they don’t want to trouble anyone. Remember that when he says this, it’s a reflection of himself too: because even if he was heartbroken beyond measure, all he would do is hide it every second; he would never expect anyone to see right through him or care.

I mean I tend think of that one post I saw that talked about how people often see themselves as a social burden when most of their life has just been a series of neglect and loss. They don’t really have a concept of “you’re not heavy because I want to stay with you. It’s my choice to care about you.” How do you feel worthwhile an existence when four hundred years later your family still won’t treat you with basic dignity. The men in the mansion also all look to him for guidance and soothing because of the kind of person he is–he’s either silent in the periphery or helping. He never betrays so much as an inkling of insecurity or distress. 

I mean the whole reason Leonardo comes to the mansion is because he has absolutely no issue helping Comte in a pivotal time of need without seeking much of anything in return. Remember that Comte explains how Leonardo came to the mansion in response to Comte’s distress about the future. This makes sense considering Comte was rapidly trying to stop Vlad by beating him to the punch, and had only enough time to plan the basics. He had no certainty things would work out, much less that his boys would thrive. But Comte, unlike the boys, has become acutely aware of how much Leonardo is hiding his fatigue and despair in the course of being helped. As such, he wants to return the favor--and tries to be a good friend to him as much as he can (handles his insane familia, keeps things light and silly time between them, takes him seriously as a person, doesn’t pry beyond what’s fair.)

[I also think of that psychology concept of “the good enough mother.” It’s not always about being perfect every second of your life. It’s about paying attention and acting where it really counts. I feel like people who grow up under an enormous burden of neglect or parental/mentor abuse have a hard time coming to terms with the idea. This notion that just trying is enough for a lot of people, that showing them they’re not alone is enough to make  difficult memories bearable. Because it’s the oppressive silence and apathy that tends to kills people, imo--not people who mean well. But Leonardo doesn’t really understand any kind of reciprocal or non-self-emptying model because the concept is beyond him. He has no experience with it beyond Comte and a select few humans he’s befriended.]

Let’s continue on this point of MC crying where he can’t see her, shall we? The reason this scares him so much is not because he doesn’t care, or doesn’t want to make the effort. It’s precisely that he cares to the point of madness. It’s that he is legitimately convinced nothing he has to say, nothing that he can do, no part of him is enough to ease what she will have to trade away to stay with him. The core issue is not one of disregard or objectification, I find it to be more about his belief that he just isn’t enough. He doesn’t trust that anyone can love him to the point where just the sight of him or time with him can heal. And while there is a foolishness to this belief, it’s understandable when you consider where he’s coming from. You can call it selfishness, but it just feels involuntary--he has a lot of fear when it comes to love.

I mean Comte even says it himself? His words here always strike me: “I want you to understand, it’s because he cherishes you just as you are--more than he cares about his future or his well-being.”

Comte is openly identifying the way that Leonardo has a tendency to give more than is healthy. That Leonardo isn’t hesitating because his feelings are lacking, he’s doing it because he knows it’s going to hurt like a bitch trying to love her and never ask beyond what feels reasonable. (Spoilers: no request is reasonable. That’s the problem here. He’s convinced he deserves nothing.) Therefore turning her into a vampire to stay with him is--consequently, to Leonardo--out of the question. This is the literal hingepoint at which Comte and Leonardo divide; Comte simply tells MC he’ll take full responsibility for asking so much of her. He intends to make her happy with every single resource and skill he has at his disposal. Even if he doubts his ability or fears losing her to vampire rhetoric madness, he’d rather try than live with the regret and immediate loss. Leonardo is more resistant because of his dour outlook, that her fear of immortality is never going to be something that either of them can overcome. And/or he’s likely afraid she’s only going to regret being together after so long, and might succumb to the ridiculous sort of power/greed complexes vampires seem so attracted to by nature.

I think Leonardo is still coming to terms with the idea that he isn't alone in the world in a lot of ways, and I think he's also coming to terms with the idea that immortality does not equate to evil. Sure, human beings on average are probably more open to flexible modes of thinking and living compared to vampires--their maturity is in some ways guaranteed due to the instances they're forced to adapt to survive. However, just one look at the ruling class and oligarchies of all kinds (even just stubborn human beings) reveals how they are not immune to the same sort of megalomania, arrogance, and thoughtless violence purebloods/vampires are capable of.

So I guess I hesitate when it comes to the thought that he only loves her because she's human. If anything, I think he loves her for the fact that she's very rooted in reality--not quite so bound by the extremes that trouble him. It's one of the many reasons I believe Leonardo needs a lot of maturity and patience; the ability to differentiate between his panicked/overwhelmed/hurt reactions versus his calm is a skill in and of itself considering his capacity for concealment. To say nothing of getting him to slow down when this happens, too.

I suppose I think about it in a way that’s similar to how Napoleon’s main story narrative is framed. While Leonardo’s route doesn’t focus on the grandeur of being a former emperor, there is a clear insinuation here that he also craves normalcy? Just a little life, with a person he loves dearly, where he can rest and be himself for once. I think because he gives off such an appearance of steadiness, people fail to see that he is barely holding on--not to mention the kind of experiences he’s been deprived of (the exact security and understanding he so expertly emulates).

Closer to your question, it’s worth mentioning that Leonardo’s life goal for a while was the creation of an immortal human being--in that he fully recognized human beings could not offer what he needed as they were.

He loves humans because of their adaptability, their frequent desire to keep seeking out hope and making the best of the broken pieces they have. But then again, it has more to do with the nature of how frequently that sensibility occurs in humans vs vampires (and immortality in general): mortality does demand some level of necessity to change and grow. Which is one of the largest trauma points for him; the vampires around him just refused to grow up, always demanding at him like children and obsessed with their power complexes.

Thing is I also don't know enough about vampire society to know how correct this perceived ratio is. However, given Comte's similar avoidance of other vampires and general inability to live with them (he and Vlad were literal childhood best friends and Comte can't stand him anymore lmao) I think Leonardo may have more validity here than people give him credit for. Which begs the question--why did he quit trying to make a human immortal? What was it that stopped him? Was it the horror of what needed to be done to achieve it? Or would a potential companion start to fall more in love with the idea of immortality than they do with life itself/him? I think it’s a worthwhile question to ask, given the disdain he seems to aim at Shakespeare in particular--once human, but now emulates all of the violence and insatiability marked by vampirism.

This is where the transition from human to vampire/immortal contains another hingepoint: is Leonardo so incapable of finding a middle ground because he feels like any choice he makes will be a wrong one? Marry a human, deprive them of a normal love where they can grow old together. Marry a human and turn them, what if they are reborn with immortal wounds/psychological harm? What if time proves they get bored of him or hateful, what if they begin to act like the predatory purebloods he hates so much? Marry a pureblood/immortal, and be hounded by his family for heirs--risk being with somebody who will never love him or their children, and only inspire more misery in the world.

Does it make sense how this can really start to become an anxious downspiral for someone like him? How the personal insecurity and life history comes together to just compound stress endlessly?

That's the thing that's important here, I think. Leonardo just needs somebody who is open-minded, firm, and not easily deceived. If one takes a look at Leonardo's main story route, the whole reason everything goes to shit so disastrously is because MC stops listening at a critical point. Granted Leonardo could have been more forthcoming for sure, but when she started assuming Shakespeare was right instead of seeing how Leonardo was feeling/reacting, she responded in ways Leonardo wasn't prepared for. He never wanted to shake her faith or insinuate whatever she is is not good enough for him, and tbh I think Leonardo downspiraled because it was just the same thing all over again. What he is--a vampire and immortal--keeps ruining everything he wants with his life. 

[chocoholicannanymous]

If the Spit Hits the Fan (Glee) Part XV

Follows pt I, pt II, pt III, pt IV, pt V, part VI, pt VII, part VIII, part IX, part X, part XI, part XII, part XIII and part XIV.

Being Sebastian's boyfriend really isn't that much different from being his friend. They do a lot of the same things, and talk about the same stuff, only now there's hand-holding and kissing and cuddling with it. Apart from the touching though? Nothing really changes much.

Which kind of makes it sound like how it was with Blaine.

It's not though.

Sebastian will hold his hand in the hallway without worrying about being seen. And yes, Dalton is different from McKinley – so, so much different, and safer – but Blaine even hesitated to hold Kurt's hand in the choir room, surrounded by friends.

Sebastian kisses him in a way that never leaves Kurt doubting there's attraction, and has to stop his hands from wandering too far on a regular basis – yet never making Kurt worry he won't stop.

Sebastian makes Kurt have to stop himself, both from allowing it and from doing his own wandering. They're still too new to go there, no matter how much Kurt's hormones sit up and beg every time Sebastian touches him. (They'll get there, Kurt's sure, just... Step by step, and not yet.)

Sebastian reaches out for Kurt without looking – sometimes seemingly without thinking – to pull him close, and always makes a space for him.

And when Sebastian sings, it's with Kurt, or for him, not at him.

It's a far cry from scheduled make-outs and avoiding even PG13 levels of PDA and being made to feel like his boyfriend is more interested in his own hand than in Kurt.

It's amazing.

There's a rainbow rose hanging on Kurt's door on Valentine's day. He and Sebastian have been dating for two days – a day and a half, if he was to be picky – and Kurt knows from last year's insanity that there's not a flower shop within two hours of Vesterville that carries rainbow roses. They have to be ordered special, and with a lot more warning than two days.

Kurt's not the least bit ashamed about how he squeals, or how he turns on his heel and kisses his boyfriend (!) for long enough to be a little dizzy afterwards.

This isn't to say that Sebastian is a perfect boyfriend. He's not. Then again, neither is Kurt. He's working from romantic movies and the examples from the New directions, and of course from his time with Blaine. Neither is a good road map. Romantic movies have so many flaws Kurt don't really want to examine, and a lot of his favorites are set too far back in time to be useful as guidelines. The loves lives of his old glee mates are...well. They're flawed too, when seen without rose-colored glasses and envy.

As for his relationship with Blaine... Even if he's not counting how it ended that relationship was so very less than perfect, and honestly it was both their faults. Kurt's not without blame, he knows that and can admit it without somehow pretending what Blaine did wrong never happened.

So he's trying to learn from his mistakes, and other people's mistakes, and he does his best to communicate with Sebastian – who does the same in return.

Also, no one can say that they don't argue. They definitely do. They have from the beginning, and they're both opinionated passionate people, so why should they stop now? Their relationship has changed – they themselves haven't.

It's just that they manage to argue in a way that works. That doesn't makes Kurt pull out his claws to eviscerate Sebastian, that doesn't scare Kurt, or make him give in to “preserve the peace”. That, right there, was one of the things that had sent his relationship with Blaine down the wrong turn. When he'd first told his dad that he'd begun dating Blaine Burt Hummel had told him never to go to bed angry with his partner. He'd meant to sort out arguments and disagreements, but Kurt had interpreted it as needing to back down and push down his anger or hurt. With Sebastian he doesn't.

They argue, because that's who – and how – they are, but they do it in as mature and healthy way as they are able to, being teenagers. And they apologize if they step over the line. Not Kurt apologizes, regardless, with Sebastian pouting until he does, but both of them.

If Kurt had to, he'd call it damned near perfect. Instead he'll just say it's good, and he's happy.

That's never something to look down on.

The week of Regionals is weird. Kurt's never felt as prepared or as calm with a competition approaching, which is rather telling. The rest of the Warblers are a different story though. Kurt has made it clear that his primary goal is to beat the Troubletones, and his friends are feeling the pressure. They even ask if Kurt and Sebastian won't reconsider singing 'Human Nature'.

“Look, guys, I'm honored, really, that you would trust me, us like that. But I want to win more than I want that solo. And even if we ignore the fact that Ohio doesn't seem ready for a gay duet, I really do think the setlist we have is stronger as is. The Troubletones have a great presence, and both Mercedes and Santana are awesomely talented. However, everything about the Troubletones are built around them. The rest of the girls are background and dancing. If we go on with a number that's the same they are going to win, for no other reason than that most people find girls prettier and nicer to look at.

“But if we go on as an actual choir, for a show choir competition? We'll win. I'm sure of it. We've worked so hard with our songs, and I wouldn't change a thing about our setlist.”

And it's true. They have an amazing setlist, and everything flows in a way that makes Kurt feel practically professional, and he's not giving that – and its chance to win – up to stare longingly at Sebastian while singing a song that exposes them to the core.

No. Kurt's going to have quite a lot more time in the spotlight than he'd expected when turning down a proper solo. He's going to sing with his friends, and his boyfriend, and he's going to show McKinley what it means to be a team onstage.

The Troubletones are just as amazing onstage as Kurt thought. They've done a good job picking their songs, and Mercedes still has the best voice he's ever heard live. Santana's not quite as talented, but give her the right song – which these are – and she'll blow your mind. Their choreography showcases the girls poached from the Cheerios without making Mercedes look too far behind, and their clothes look good.

Kurt would vote for them any day, even with Rachel being given a place in the background, except this one. This is going to be his day. He meets Sebastians eyes as they line up and nods.

Showtime.

'I want You Back' does exactly what it's meant to, namely getting the audience in a party mood. As the last notes flows into the first from 'Man in the Mirror' the mood shifts and Kurt feels his own shift with it. His solo feels a little raw, because in no way can he sing those lines without being reminded of all the crap he's gone through over the past 6 months.

“...a willow deeply scared, somebody's broken heart and a washed out dream...”

Well. His heart might have been broken, and his dreams about Blaine did wash out. But he's got new dreams, and his hearts healed, and no matter the scars he's whole where it matters. And even if he wasn't? He's looking in the mirror, and he's changing.

They bring the party back with their last song, giving their all transforming the sounds of 'Beat It' to sounds that can be reproduced by the human throat. The dancing is the most demanding Kurt's ever done onstage, and he knows he will definitely be beat after. But they look and sound awesome, and that's all that matters.

Or maybe not, he ruefully thinks as he sees Finn on his feet, jumping up and down and whooping as the Warblers are proclaimed the winners and Rachel looks like she's been pelted with eggs again.

“You stole our songs!”

Of course. All Kurt wants to do is get on the bus, go back to Dalton and celebrate. Okay, shower, then celebrate. So naturally Rachel is waiting to ambush him. Well, that's not going to go the way she's probably thinking.

“Really? Really Rachel, you're going there? You know very well that we didn't steal anything. Oh, I know that there was a suggestion that the New Directions do Michael for Sectionals, but I also know that you were the one who refused to accept it.

“You really blew it there. Michael is a great choice for Sectionals or Regionals, what with the Ohio mindset, and I'm pretty sure you would have won with the setlist the guys suggested. I'm not surprised you put a stop to it though.”

Rachel draws back, looking first shocked, then insulted, then finally like an angry goose, complete with hissing sound. He's not letting it touch him though, lets it run over him, one might say, like water over a goose.

“There are no songs in Michael Jacksons discography that's a given for you, no certainty that you'll be featured. And in the end, that's what mattered, wasn't it? Not that the New Directions won, but that you won. You wanted to beat the Troubletones, didn't you? Wanted to show that you were better than Mercedes, wanted to prove that her beating you when auditioning for Maria was just a fluke. Wanted to prove what everyone knows, that's she's every bit as good as you, and sometimes better, is wrong.

“Well, congratulations. You got what you wanted in terms of the setlist and the spotlight, but you fucked up everything else. And not just for you, but for everyone.”

An expression of pain flies across Rachel's face, and he pushes the knife in a little bit further.

“We weren't as blind though. The minute Finn told me about the Michael setlist I knew it was a winner. As did the other Warblers. I asked Finn first, and Sam and Puck. They didn't think we needed their permission, as you didn't use the songs, but they gave it any way.”

Kurt looks at Rachel, looks at the way she's still fuming, still refusing to see any other side than her own. It won't matter what he says – she'll keep ignoring any and all arguments against her. Once he might have tried harder to make her understand, but as things are he just wants to leave. His boyfriend's waiting and that makes Kurt out of time to spend on his former friend.

“Your loss, our gain.”

He starts to leave, but thinks better of it. He's got one more jab in him.

“Oh, and Rachel? Don't worry. Going to Nationals is a privilege, and we won't waste it. We've already gotten started on a setlist.”

It's petty, but. So's she.

That evening the Warblers celebrate as thoroughly as a bunch of uniformed boys in a well-staffed boarding school can. This means that it's late when Kurt drags Sebastian to his room (unlike him Sebastian's in a single), but neither of them is under the influence of anything but happiness.

That's important to Kurt as they tumble into Sebastian's bed while kissing, because he doesn't want there to be any doubt in Sebastian's mind that when Kurt pulls off his shirt and then goes for his fly it's because he wants to.

Having Sebastian stop him is frustrating, to say the very least.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

It's only the fact that it's Sebastian, and that he's shown himself trustworthy in so many ways over the past months that stops Kurt from storming out.

“I thought we... You know?”

It's so hard to say, to open himself up like this, years of being told he's a predator, or ugly, or plain wrong getting just as much in his way as the fact that he's never done this, and the only time he's been even close wasn't even about him.

Apparently he's going to have to use his words regardless, because Sebastian's not taking the opening.

“I thought we could have sex.” There. Words. Consent. Door wide open.

And yet Sebastian's still not taking the opening.

“What's the hurry?”

Kurt pulls back a little, hurt blooming.

“No, no, don't. Talk to me, okay? I'm a bit surprised I guess. We haven't even been dating for two months yet, and I know this is new for you.”

“So? It's not like I'm waiting for marriage.”

Kurt knows he sounds a bit snippy, and he has sort of been waiting – not for marriage, but for something, some feeling of more. He's got that feeling with Sebastian, so what's the point of waiting any longer? Everyone else his age (or so it feels) is having sex so why can't he?

Some of it must bleed through because Sebastian gets that “aha” look, and nods a bit.

“Look, regardless of what I might have said or implied when chasing Blaine, I'm actually not the whore of Babylon. I have, however, rounded a few bases and enjoyed them. I think you'd enjoy them too, and I would love to find out first hand. But that doesn't have to mean we go straight to fucking.” Kurt blushes, because he might be ready to do it, but those words...

“So. I'm not going to push, and I'm not going to rush. I am more than interested though, I'm just happy to take it a bit slow. To build up to every step. As far as I'm concerned you've earned that.”

Sebastian's looking so earnest it kills Kurt annoyance, and then lightning-quick it's replaced by a vicked look than makes him shiver all over.

“I wouldn't mind showing you the first of many, many bases now though. How about it, babe?”

Kurt doesn't mind either, neither then nor the next day.