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maybedefinitely404 · 4 years

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Day 16: Prinxiety

@tsshipmonth2020

Heeey, look at that, I’m behind! Day 16: When your soulmate listens to music, you hear it in your own head as well.

Content warnings: assumed death of a soulmate (he’s not dead), depression, general sad vibes.

Word count: 2.6k

Note: the songs referenced in this fic are IDK You Yet by Alexander 23 and Love is Gone by SLANDER. Both of these songs make me cry and were the inspiration for this.

It was at midnight on December 19th when Roman’s soulmark first appeared. He didn’t realize this until 1am.

Granted, he didn’t know it was his soulmark for the first hour.

At first, the almost imperceptible steady beat in his head just seemed like a song that had gotten stuck in there. He didn’t remember ever hearing the song, but it wasn’t unlikely that he’d heard the tune at the store or on the radio and it unconsciously ingrained itself into his memory. He was working on an assignment that was due in the morning, a script analysis for one of his Theatre courses, and had begun to bop his head along to the music when his roommate walked in, eyes bleary and arms laden with books.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” He asked through a yawn, dropping the books on his desk and flopping into the bottom bunk.

“I could ask you the same question, Pat,” Roman hummed, completing his conclusion paragraph with a dramatic flair of his hands. “Just finished my paper. Going now.”

“Lost track of time at the library,” Patton murmured in response, draping his arms over his eyes.

Closing his computer, Roman popped his back and climbed up the small ladder into the top bunk, using his cellphone as a flashlight. He assumed Patton was already fast asleep (the man could fall asleep at the drop of a hat) and tried to follow suit, only to sit up in annoyance after several minutes.

Whatever song was stuck in his head was keeping him up.

He remembered a tip he’d seen on the internet once, that said if you sing the last part of the song, it’s easier to get out of your head. Something about ‘your brain needing to complete it to be satisfied’ or whatever. As hard as he focused, though, he couldn’t for the life of him figure out what song it was, much less the ending.

The more he concentrated on it, the louder it seemed to get, until it was no longer a hum of bass in the back of his skull, and he could make out the lyrics, the guitar solos, everything. He definitely hadn’t heard this song before. It wasn’t the kind you’d hear playing in public; it was loud, swears thrown in every chorus, just generally the kind of thing you’d hear in a Hot Topic but nowhere else.

And then it stopped.

For a split second he was pleased, thanking his brain for finally shutting off, and conceded to lie back down. He might be able to get six hours of sleep at this rate. Pretty good, for a college student.

Except as soon as he closed his eyes, another song started. It was another one he didn’t know, one he would have no way of knowing each word to. The realization hit him hard and his eyes shot open, nearly falling off the ladder in his haste to climb down.

“Roman? Everything okay?” Patton drawled, clearly having been woken up by Roman’s enthusiasm.

“My soulbond!”

“What?!” That got his attention and he jerked up, narrowly missing whacking his head on the top bunk.

“The music in my head all night, it’s my soulmate! It must be his birthday!”

He was pulling up music on his laptop before he’d even processed it, hands freezing over the keyboard as his brain grasped for something to play. What could he play that would properly introduce himself to his soulmate? A show tune? Something from the 80s? But his mind had gone completely blank, and he couldn’t think of a single one.

“What do I play, Pat?” He gasped, tapping the mousepad in time with the upbeat tempo in his head.

Patton was suddenly leaning over his shoulder, clacking a name into the search bar before pressing enter. Roman narrowed his eyes

“Why that one?”

Patton shrugged, “It’s kind of cheesy romantic, like you. And the first line is fitting.”

“A valid point,” Roman announced, closing his eyes to listen for a pause as the music switched. The second the song ended, he slammed the space bar, begging it to play before the next one started.

How can you miss someone you’ve never met?

Because I need you now but I don’t know you yet,

But can you find me soon, because I’m in my head,

Yeah, I need you now but I don't know you yet.

A little more depressing than he initially would have chosen, but he could see Patton’s point. The music on the other end had been paused and he smiled in accomplishment, knowing that he must have heard. He let the song play to the end of the first chorus before pausing it, waiting with his roommate with baited breath.

The silence was almost unbearably long, Patton watching him intently for some kind of indication that the music was back.

Hello,

It’s me.

Adele’s soothing melody filled his mind and he absolutely wheezed with laughter. Patton grinned and let him explain through gasps for air, and he let out a giggle in response.

“Okay,” Roman snorted, “What next?”

Patton passed out probably an hour later after helping Roman pick out songs that would adequately encompass him as a person, but the theatre student didn’t sleep last night. Eventually him and his soulmate found a nice rhythm, each playing a song in turn. It didn’t take long for him to assume that his soulmate was emo (a fact that had him blushing furiously), simply due to the overwhelming amount of My Chemical Romance and Green Day played in his head, and he figured it was probably pretty obvious that he was a theatre kid. The second song he played was from Heathers, afterall.

When his eyes finally started drooping too much to ignore, he knew he had to end this soon. The soulmate’s song ended and he quickly pulled up the first thing he’d thought of, a children’s lullaby, trying to indicate that he had to sleep.

There was quiet on the other end when the song ended, before the beginning trills of Baby Shark started playing and he groaned, quickly muffling the sound with his hand so as to not wake his roommate. He didn’t let it play past one verse, thank Olympus, and then his mind was quiet for the first time in many hours. It seemed like a mutual agreement that ‘now is sleep time’, and Roman went to sleep with a smile on his face.

Their new norm was quickly established in the following weeks. It became obvious almost right away that playing their music at the same time was cacophonous and only caused headaches, so they eventually settled on switching days. Every second morning, Roman would wake up to his alarm and quickly start his morning playlist, a set of rousing, uplifting, exciting songs to get his blood flowing for the day. It was his day to choose the music, so he’d set his walking playlist for class and his study one for the evenings, sometimes playing an adventure podcast or something to spice things up. The other days, he’d be woken by the soft notes of melancholy tunes, starting the day slowly. As the morning progressed, usually by the time he was eating breakfast, the tone would change to something a little more fast paced, as if his soulmate needed to warm up before getting to the main act. As much as the music wasn’t his style, he found himself keeping pace to the beat with his steps, bopping his head along to the melody, humming a harmony to the more commonly played ones. Just knowing that this was his soulmate made it better.

And then, one day… the music stopped.

He’d woken up around noon, not a big deal since he didn’t have classes until after lunch anyways, but he knew for a fact that his soulmate was always up by 10, latest. Whether the other had classes or a job that kept his schedule, he didn’t know. It was an oddity for sure that there was no alarm.

He put it off to the other probably having a sick day, or a free schedule, and he was sleeping in for once. The worry only started creeping in near the evening, when usually at this time, the music would start slowing down again as the sun set. There hadn’t been a peep all day, which was very unlike either of them. Even though the silence bothered him, he wouldn’t dare intrude on the other’s day, so he studied and ate dinner in silence, tapping his pencil against the table. Of course, he put it off to a one day fluke.

Except, two days after, when it should have been his soulmate’s turn again, there was no music. And the time after that. And the one after that. It was almost two weeks of radio silence on the other end before he called Patton through broken sobs, pleading for him to stop studying and come back to the dorm. Obviously, he made the ten minute walk in five.

And then Roman admitted the way his anxieties had been spiralling.

“What if- What if our soulbond broke? Did the universe realize we were a mistake? Or… or what if he died?! What if he’s hurt or dying or alone and I’m just-”

Patton shushed him gently, rubbing his back as Roman hiccuped into his shoulder. “When did this start?”

“Two- two weeks ago.”

“Then isn’t it possible that he just isn’t listening to music for a little while? Maybe he’s… somewhere without wifi. Or his phone broke.”

Even though he very much didn’t believe a word Patton was saying, he nodded along messily, clutching Patton’s shirt tighter. He eventually agreed to give him more time, hold on just a little longer, before completely giving up.

It took about a month before he did, and it didn’t get better from there.

Their consistency had been their norm for almost nine months, over summer break and now into the new school year, and now it was torn away without warning. Roman refused to listen to music on days that weren’t his, even though Patton tried to tell him it was okay, but he wouldn’t. It didn’t feel right. He mourned his soulmate the same way he would mourn a close friend’s death, for he truly believed he was gone for good. The person he’d barely gotten to understand, much less meet, and he was just… gone. He was going to live the rest of his life without a soulmate.

Most nights he just did the bare basics of the homework he had to do, without any of the old flair he’d put into all his work, and curled onto his bed to watch a show or, on his days, listen to music. His old playlists had shifted to the bottom of his rotation, now only bringing sadder memories that Patton had insisted he not indulge in at this point, so it was usually just automated lists he found. Nothing was special about them anymore.

Today was his day, an uneventful Saturday where the most exciting occurrence was Patton convincing him to come to the cafeteria and eat with other people. It had been tiring and only made him feel more alone, so his daily scheduled moping times had come up a little earlier. Patton had given him a hug and a gentle kiss on the head, telling him he had to go meet some people for a group project, and to call if he needed anything, before grabbing his bag and leaving. Roman didn’t miss the sad look tossed his way before the door shut.

Despite Patton’s advice, he was feeling particularly shitty today, and his fingers, seemingly with a mind of their own, pulled up one of his older playlists. One of the ones that was reminiscent of days when he actually had a soulmate. He clicked shuffle and tossed the phone onto the pillow next to his head, curling that much deeper into his blankets, as if he could somehow refill the void that had been cut out of him.

How can you miss someone you’ve never met?

Because I need you now but I don’t know you yet,

But can you find me soon, because I’m in my head,

Yeah, I need you now but I don't know you yet.

The first song he’d ever played had become a sort of inside joke between them. Despite the song’s sad melody and somber lyrics, it was a reminder of the first time they’d interacted; an awkward, laughter filled night. At least, it had been on Roman’s night, and he could only hope it had been the same on the other end.

He didn’t even realize he was crying until the pillow beneath him was tear stained and gross to lay on. Why had the universe chosen him as the target for its cruel irony? Not that he wished this on anyone else… but why couldn’t soulmates be foolproof? Why was there that margin for error, the always-there possibility that everything you’ve ever dreamed of will be ripped out of your hands just as soon as you think you have it? So close, but so far. At least before they’d connected, he’d lived in blissful hope and ignorance.

The song ended and he pressed pause lethargically, not able to find the emotional strength to listen to more. Maybe Patton had been right. A glance out the window showed that it was well past nightfall, the full moon gleaming into his window, and he decided to just sleep the emptiness away. It hadn’t worked so far, but maybe tonight was the night. He turned off his phone screen and plugged it in to charge, rolling away to face the wall, and waited for the soothing peace of sleep to take over him.

At first, he thought it was just a hallucination, wishful thinking. More than once in the three months since his soulmate disappeared, he’d thought he’d heard music, only for the feeling to disappear as soon as he focused on it. A soulbond only became louder when concentrated on, so he eventually realized he was doing it to himself subconsciously, his mind struggling to fill the emptiness that had once been filled by the other’s music.

When it disappeared, he figured it was music from someone else’s dorm filtering through the thin walls. But no, this was too clear, too distinct, too ingrained, to be coming from an external source.

He calmed his racing heart before he could jump to conclusions. This music isn’t like what his used to be. It must be your brain, because he’s gone. He’s GONE, Roman.

Much as he tried to push it down, he couldn’t. It was becoming evident that no, something was happening, and it had to do with his soulmate. As he had done for the time he’d known (could it be considered ‘knowing’) the other, he concentrated on the lyrics, because those were the only feeble ways they’d interacted in those times.

I’m sorry,

Don’t leave me,

I want you here with me,

I know that your love is gone.

I can’t breathe,

I’m so weak,

I know this isn’t easy,

Don’t tell me that your love is gone,

That your love is gone.

Patton walked in after his group meeting to see Roman sobbing in his bed and, immediately assuming the worst, he jumped onto the bed and pulled him into his arms. Through gasps for breath, Roman was able to choke out that, “He’s back. He’s playing music. He’s back. He’s back.”

Part 2 HERE

#lywrites #tsshipmonth2020 #sanderssides #sanders sides #prinxiety #roman sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #sad tw #depression tw #ts soulmate au #sanders sides fanfiction #sanderssidesfanfiction

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i-dont-want-your-hysteria · 3 years

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The Hangover (Def Leppard x Reader)

(Happy birthday to my blog!! To celebrate 3 years of the place where I concentrate my insane Leppard obsession, I thought I’d celebrate by posting the FIRST Def Leppard fanfic I EVER wrote ((which I have NEVER posted anywhere before!)) I began writing this exactly 3 years ago today- the day I made this blog ((February 19th, 2018))- and officially finished it about a year later. This is not intended as a romantic/sexual fic, it’s simply just an x reader in which the reader is basically one of the guys. In other words, it’s on crack.)

((I am aware this is kind of cringe-worthy at times... but I still like a lot of things about it. While I revised it very slightly before queuing it, I was still 16 when I started writing this, okay... gimme a break...))

(Illustration by @paper-sxn)

Words: 8,684 Prompt: Dublin, 1984. You’re with the Leppards in their early pre-Hysteria era house. You all wake up with hangovers after a boozed-up night at home, and you each try to put the pieces of the previous night back together. Meanwhile, you’re praying that one particular piece won’t fit in anywhere... (partially inspired by the “Blitzgiving” and “The Pineapple Incident” episodes of How I Met Your Mother)

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Gently piercing white light made its way through the windows of the bedroom. It hit your eyelids, and it hit your brain, igniting a brief but killer headache. As your eyes clasped together more, you turned your face into the gloriously soft pillow. For a second you asked yourself why you would have a headache so early in the morning, but then…

You laughed quietly into the bed, recalling without warning some vague happenings from the night before. There wasn’t much you remembered, but you clearly saw the image of the guys flat out drunk at some point (you along with them). There were some blips of you all singing together, Sav hanging from a door frame, you chugging some scotch, Joe chugging some vodka, Steve’s hair being in pigtails, and you think Phil might’ve been giving you a lap dance... or vice versa. It was, all in all, hysterical (at least- that’s what you wanted to think).

Other than those faint events, unfortunately, the night was gone. Still, you were thrilled that it happened. Crazy times with your boys were always good.

You rubbed your eyes, ready for more sleep to combat the pounding in your head. When you did, they opened a little, and you realized… this wasn't your room you were in. Squinting around, you noticed that you were sleeping in Phil’s room instead of yours.

Oh, it’s not that much of a problem, you mused, I’m sure he doesn’t mind. I’ve woken up to worse in this place.

You let your eyes close again easily, and you found peace as you began to fall under again. That is, until you felt someone move next to you.

When it happened, you became aware of the warmth coming from someone else in the bed. They only shifted in their sleep a little bit before going still again. Your eyes went wide, and you held your breath. You don’t remember getting into bed with someone (in fact, you don’t remember getting into bed at all). Turning your head, you looked to see what sort of stranger was in bed with you currently. Instead of a stranger, scraggly blonde hair over a kind and shy face met your sight, and you were instantly calmed upon realizing that it was just Steve. That was good, that was good, but why were you and Steve sleeping in Phil’s bed? You were sure you didn’t have sex last night- at least, not with Steve. This tiny moment of appeasement and confusion was cut short by the faint sound of guitar chords coming from downstairs. The music echoed to your ears, signaling that it had to be Phil, and that he was playing the opening to Bringin On the Heartbreak. Cautiously taking the covers off you- not wanting to wake Steve- you felt obliged to go to the other guitarist. When you stood up and began walking, you nearly fell forward from the sudden vertigo of your hangover. You had to hold onto the counter of Phil’s dresser for extra support, and that’s when your reflection in his mirror caught your eye. Not only that, but that’s when your outfit also caught your eye. One of the guys’ Union Jack tank tops had been slipped over you somehow, and two hand prints were on either side of your face in dried paint; one was blue, one was green. "What…?“ you whispered, touching your face and feeling the shirt on you. It seemed to fit you alright, which made you wonder whose it really was. You were also in black underwear, and nothing else. While eyeing yourself, you took notice of Steve in the reflection. You now saw a few big red lipstick stains on his face, untouched and unsmudged. It was pretty cute, you had to admit, but another thing that came to your attention was that it wasn’t you who was wearing the lipstick at the moment. So then who kissed Steve all over his face? You treaded carefully down the hallway, putting one foot in front of the other and dragging a hand on the wall for support. The melody of the distant guitar didn’t cease the whole time you trekked through the house to get to Phil. When the chords of the song dragged on to the part where the vocals should have begun, no vocals came. Everything in the house looked remarkably the same (despite everything you remember from last night). There were large, ripped pieces of cardboard in the middle of the hallway; scattered out as if leaving a trail. Alongside that, there was a piece of paper labeled “pay 2 the orerr of Rick: one fuckin bendee straw” in what may have been Sav’s handwriting on top of the stairs, and blue paint smudged on the railing going downwards (guaranteeing that whoever did that eventually got to your face, too).

Step by step you descended as the scenery of the house teetered around you (a little too reminiscent of Me & My Wine, you would add). When you reached the bottom of the stairs and looked into the living room, sure enough, Phil was there, strumming away.

“But it’s easy come and easy go…” he hummed.

“You’re…” you mumbled, burped a little, and continued, “Awake. How?” He stopped playing and crossed his arms, quietly sassing you, “Ah, she rises again. You regrettin’ anything yet?” You blinked and rubbed your eyes, scratching a little bit of paint off of your face and inquiring in a scratchy, tired tone, “I guess so… but- how? You, how?” Phil took off his guitar and stood up with his hands in his pockets, “Because I barely drank at all last night, and I also sure as hell didn’t shag Steve in someone else’s bed!” “How do you mean- I didn’t- wait- and Steve- what?” you rubbed your head, getting dizzy, causing Phil to guide you to the couch. “I didn’t- I didn’t shag Steve last night,” you insisted. “Mm hmm,” the guitarist hummed disapprovingly, “Alright.” “What the hell are you on about?” Phil smirked evilly and laughed, “He carried you upstairs, we heard the door close, and then some rather happy noises were heard, so we all just assumed-!” “That’s not-” you swallowed and lay your head back on the couch, “-a valid assumption.” “Oh, you poor thing,” came the sarcastic remark, “You really don’t remember, do you?” “Well I figured if I ever fucked any one of you I would- you know- remember it!” you raised your voice at him, then rubbed your temples. “I’m touched, really. But I’ll fill you in a bit,” Phil yanked up his guitar he’d put down, placed himself next to you, and played the into to “Ballroom Blitz”. Then a bit of the night came back to you. “Oh... that’s what started it all, didn’t it?”

~The night before~ Rick began banging out a tune on his drum kit in the house with you, Sav, and Steve sitting close by, them being at the ready with their guitars. “You ready, Steve?” you mimicked the original lyrics. “Uh-huh,” he replied exactly like Steve Priest in the original song. “Savy?” you said next. “Yeah,” Sav bopped his head to the beat. “Rick?” “Okay.” “Alright, fellas,” you called out, “Let’s go!” The two guitarists let their instruments ring out around the house, playing the all-too-familar tune. As soon as they started this, the front door opened, and none other than Phil and Joe walked in. Joe was holding a bag that was weighed down by the mass inside it (a painfully obvious sign that there were a few bottles of booze). Although the two of them weren’t talking, they were physically hushed upon hearing the situation you and the others had created. “Oh life’s been getting so hard, living with the things you do to me…” you sang lowly and quietly along with the music being made, just to make sure the musicians knew their places. You noticed Phil run out of the room in excitement, and into the one where he keeps his guitars. Joe, on the other hand, stayed put and watched the rest of you from afar, fighting a smile. “My dreams are getting so strange, I’d like to tell you everything I see…” You stood up, and Joe began walking towards you when you called out the next line of the song, “Oh- I see a man in the back, as a matter of fact, his eyes are as red as a sun!” Joe chimed in without warning at the next line, putting an arm on your shoulder and pointing at you, “And the girl in the corner, let no one ignore her, ‘cos she thinks she’s the passionate one!” *** “It’s, it’s a ballroom blitz, it's, it's a ballroom blitz,” Phil sang the ending teasingly to you when he put his guitar back. It felt like he was rubbing his energy in your face (since you lacked it). Before Phil could continue, Joe suddenly appeared in the doorway. “Yeah! It’s a ballroom blitz!” he announced, throwing his arms into the air and taking a bow. He sounded a bit tipsy still. Joe was wearing his Union Jack shorts, but no shirt. Instead of a shirt, though, he had the words “PROPERTY OF DEF LEPPARD” sloppily painted across his chest in blue and green paint. Right over his nipples there were also two handprints, almost exactly matching the ones on your face. Joe stumbled in the doorway, falling to his knees and groaning in discomfort, “Ohh... probably should’ve stayed in bed.” Phil sluggishly trekked over to the singer and pulled him partially to his feet, yanking him towards the couch, “Oh yeah? And by ‘bed’, you mean-?” “Definitely not the bathtub.” Joe assured him, but winked at you. “No matter where you slept, it’s still not as bad as where she slept,” Phil pointed at you, “And what she did there.” “Why? What’d you do?” Joe’s tipsiness wore away in his sentence, making him sound genuinely concerned and curious. You rolled your eyes, knowing exactly what Phil was going to say, “Phil, I-” “It’s not what she did, it’s who she did- she shagged Steve in my bed!” the guitarist accused you again while pointing a finger. Immediately Joe exclaimed, “Nice!” and held up a hand to high-five you. “Joe!” you scolded him, surprised that he took this as good news. “Oh-uh, not… nice?” he took away the offer of a high-five and scratched the back of his head awkwardly instead, “Also, is that my shirt?” You took a look down at the Union Jack tank top you were wearing and back at Joe’s torso. Then something clicked in your head. “Ohh…” you continued staring at Joe’s chest, feeling yourself blush as old memories unraveled in your head, “I think... I think I remember something else that happened last night.” *** You were all drunk; it was no lie. After your quick jam session, there was a booze-filled music fest going on in the house. Joe had even put on his Union Jack outfit, pretending he was getting ready for a show. At one particular point of this “festival” you'd all created, records were being played, and you ended up dancing in front of Joe to REO Speedwagon’s “Take It On the Run”. “You’re bringing up your white lines, you’re pullin’ on a bedroom eyes, you say you’re going home, but I won’t say when,” you sang the wrong lyrics as you swayed and drunkingly made flirty faces at Joe on the couch. Sav, meanwhile, was playing with some old craft paint off in the corner. The blue and green substances were all over his hands (but somehow, one color managed to stay on each hand). “Yeah, you dance for him, Y/N!” Rick cheered you on from the kitchen as Steve and Phil sat on the couch. Phil was perfectly sober, and Steve was giggling and laying with his head on Phil’s lap. You, on the other hand, were now moving closer to the singer, almost like you were giving him a lap dance. “You take it on the run, baby,” you sang along, slowly taking Joe’s Union Jack tank top off of him (with no objections from below), “If that’s the way you wanna, baby...” In return to Joe being shirtless, you slowly took off your own shirt (triggering wolf-whistles and cheers from the guys) to replace it with Joe’s tank. “Sav, mark him up!” you ordered the painted bassist in the corner as you tried to dress yourself. He happily made his way over to you and questioned, “What should I mark him with?” A single hazy idea came to you, and you eagerly whispered it into Sav’s ear. He giggled in response, and proceeded to move over to Joe, drawing something on his chest in the paint. To keep Joe from looking at what it was, you went behind the chair and covered his eyes, ordering coyly, “No peeking!” “All done!” Sav announced and retreated back to whatever he was doing in the corner. “Now, wait, Sav!” you sped over to him, lifted his hands up, and double high-fived him, getting the paint on your hands as well. To finish off what Sav had started, you ran back over to Joe on the chair, and slapped your hands on his chest, right over his nipples. Laughter erupted from everyone in the room (including Joe) and you repeated Sav’s words. “All done!” Joe gazed down at the words “PROPERTY OF DEF LEPPARD” on his chest as you continued to dance to the song playing. “You’re mine, now! You take it on the run, baby... if that’s the way you want it, baby...” Joe tried to tell you in a sexy voice, “Am I your baby now?” “If that’s the way you want it baby,” you repeated the words from the song to him, “Now I’m done dancing for you! Somebody dance for me!” Steve began pointing at everyone individually, childishly suggesting, “It should be, eenie, meenie, miney, Phil!” “Why me?” Phil laughed in objection as you took a seat across the room. “Because you’re not wasted,” his terror twin argued, poking him on the nose. The sober guitarist looked over at you with happy anticipation, awaiting a comment, while all you did was wiggle your fingers at him with a goofy grin. After that, you returned the gesture to the man on his lap, giving Steve a sexy wink. *** “Oh my god...” you put your head in your hands shamefully as Phil and Joe giggled at the memory of the previous night, “I can’t believe I did all that...” “That was a treat!” Phil laughed, hugging you from the side and pulling you closer to him in consolation, “It was funny! We never get to see that side of you!” “There’s a certain reason why you don’t...” you moaned with embarrassment, then asked out of guilty curiosity, “How many times did I grab your ass during that lap dance...?" Phil thought for a bit before telling you, “Four. Well- four and a half...” You gave a loud groan of protest as Joe laughed and slumped back into the couch. “Oh, you only did those things because you weren’t thinking!” Phil consoled you, swayed back and forth with you in his arms. Joe chimed in, “Yeah, and see what happens when you don’t think? You do! Most importantly, you do Steve!” “I didn't do Steve!” you shot your head up and yelled at Joe. You received only laughs and snorts from both men in reply. Suddenly, Sav appeared on the staircase and began singing “Squeeze Box” by The Who with a tired yet cheeky smirk, “Mama’s got a squeeze box she wears on her chest, and when Stephen comes home, he never gets no rest-” Joe and Phil joined into his song with, “Cos' she’s playin’ all night, and the music’s alright! Mama’s got a squeeze box, Stephen never sleeps at night!” You just put your head back in your hands, trying not to accept your fate of being teased. You didn’t want to think that you possibly shagged Steve. He always seemed so innocent to you in a way, and you feared that this would kill your friendship. If everything the boys said was true, you would never hear the end of it, and you don’t even know what Steve would think of you from now on. Was it possible that he remembered anything about the night before? “It didn’t happen, it didn’t happen...” you repeated to yourself in a whisper as Phil unwrapped his arms from you. Sav came all the way down the stairs; his body language making him look grumpy with the world, but his tired grin signaling that he was pleased with seeing you. “Oh, it happened, sunshine!” the frizzy-haired bassist laughed, but quickly regretted it and rubbed his head with his still-painted hands, “Ah- yep, it happened. You could probably hear you two up the whole damn street.” As Sav wearily joined you all on the couch, Joe complained, “Sounds like that was a treat; I wish I remembered it!” Phil was caught off guard at the comment. His head turned to Joe in the blink of an eye and gasped, “Wait, you don’t remember hearing them?!” “I wish I could say I do, but there’s nothing there,” Joe stood up after he spoke, and quickly held onto the wall nearby. His hand went over his stomach as he whined, “Oh... fuck, Y/N, why did you make me race you last night?" “'Race me'?” you squinted as you inquired, “Race you with what?” Joe didn’t answer, but slowly took steps into the kitchen, using the wall as his guide. His answer came when you, Sav, and Phil all heard him throw up into the sink. You sighed, resting your hands over your eyes, trying to remember the cause of Joe’s sickness, “Oh no, was that really my idea?” *** “Look what I found!” you trotted into the room tipsily, holding two bottles; one of scotch, one of vodka, “Only half full! Who wants em?” While you weren’t full-on drunk, it was no secret that the title wasn’t that far away. After your little Ballroom Blitz, it was one beer after the next, then it was digging into the fancy liquors that Phil and Joe had just brought home. Your judgment was impaired, no doubt about it, and so was the judgment of all the guys. Joe even changed into his normal live-show-only Union Jack tank top, claiming that he was gonna "put on a show." The only one who was still sane and sober was Phil, who seemed to be staying away from your poison. Upon registering your sacred offer of alcohol, Rick ran forward, chanting, “Me! Me!” You lifted the bottles away from him, commanding, “Uh-uh! I get the scotch.” “Oh, bollocks, then you can keep the vodka,” the young drummer grumbled and turned away from you. Just as Rick rejected your offering, Joe sprung up and eagerly trotted over while shouting happily, “I’ll take it!” “Sold!” you handed the bottle over to him, “Betcha can’t finish before me!” “Betcha I can!” he sneered back before taking the cap off his bottle. There was no official “ready, set, go” for the race; you both just kind of went for it without any saying. While your throat and stomach were already protesting your actions (and you could almost sense that Joe’s were doing the same), you didn’t stop once; neither of you did. You held up your bottle and announced, “Done!” Looking over, you saw Joe was also finished. “I finished first!” “Nuh-uh!” you insisted, “It had to be me! Tell him, guys!” The four others hadn’t been paying attention to you and Joe’s little competition; they were instead focused on a box that Sav had pulled out from a cupboard. From the box they pulled out bottles of paint and various types of used makeup.

Joe scolded them all in a more sober manner, “Oh come on, you lot weren’t even watching!” “Yeah, yeah, it was probably a tie, anyways,” Rick chuckled, pulling out more items from the box. “This box is much more interesting, too," Phil protested, holding up a stick of lipstick as Sav held up two bottles of paint, "This is a box of makeup that I had for me and the lads in Girl! Just look at it all! Think we can have some fun with this?" "Oh, piss off," you threw the empty bottle onto the couch, "We need some music." Joe had slumped down onto a chair, and you stumbled your way over to the shelf with all the records on it, flipping through and eyeing them all as carefully as your body would let you. After only a few seconds of searching, your eyes lit up at a discovery. "Here's a good one!" you exclaimed as you pulled out a copy of Hi Infidelityby REO Speedwagon, "Let's give it a spin!" ***

Joe wandered back into the room and fell onto the empty couch with a grumble. “Sorry, Joe...” you muttered over to him, realizing that you pressured him into more consumption of the booze. “It was probably gonna happen anyway...” he admitted, wiping his hands over his face, “It’s was my stupid choice to go through with it.” “Woah,” Phil pointed out out of nowhere, looking at you with great surprise, “What’s that on your neck?” You felt your heart drop into your stomach. “What!?” you shot up from where you sat (bringing on more dizziness), and rushed over to a mirror. Once your dizziness subsided, and you could finally see your reflection, the pink shape of a hickey on the side of your neck was now clearly conspicuous. You wondered how you hadn't noticed it before. Joe exclaimed with a smug and proud grin, “Is that from Steve!?” You groaned angrily, feeling yourself become more and more defeated. “I can’t believe it,” you gasped, slapping a hand over the mark, “Something did happen between us-!” “Y/N,” Phil pointed out again, “There’s lipstick on your thigh...” Looking down at your legs, you saw that he was right. There was a single red symbol on your right thigh that marked a kiss from the night before. Upon seeing this, what you saw when you woke up popped into your head. “Looks like Steve went to town down there,” Sav smirked at you, only wanting to rub it in more. “Guys,” you softly noted, “That wasn’t Steve... he has lipstick marks all over his face from someone else...” The three men all exchanged confused looks with each other. There was a dead end to the story of the previous night. None of them knew how to solve the mystery of the lipstick. Not even Phil, who was as good as sober 12 hours ago, didn’t have any input. Sav suddenly blurted out, “Wait a minute, I know what happened- I think...” No one said anything, but eagerly leaned forward, ready to hear the tale the bassist had to tell. “You lot remember how we found that box of old makeup last night?” he began, “Well, I walked into the bathroom with you afterwards, Y/N...” *** Rick looked at himself in the mirror in the bathroom, carefully applying the makeup to his lips, and being extra careful to not get it on the blazer he was wearing. The drummer put on his best suit just to see how it would look with the makeup he was putting on. He thought he was doing a good job for the most part; he didn’t look half bad at all! It was far easier than he expected it to be, and wondered if he was good enough to help you with your makeup at times. Thinking of you seemed to have made you appear in the doorway next to him. Both of your hands were still covered in paint. “Sink,” was all you commanded of the drummer. He moved without a word and you began to wash your hands. At the same instant, Sav appeared nearby. He grabbed the doorframe and began to swing from it, leaving conspicuous handprints afterwards. “Aren’t you gonna wash up, too?” Rick crossed his arms to sass him. “Nah, I want the colors, they’re makin’ me feel- colorful...” Sav grinned, walking over to you at the sink, requesting, “C’mere.” You looked up, only to have your face taken in Sav’s paint-covered hands. He softly giggled as you squared your vision in on him with a sneer. “Rude,” you teased, then went back to washing your hands; paint now all over your face. “What’s really rude,” Rick pulled back the shower curtain and taking a step into the tub, “Is you two interrupting my makeup time! Good night!” He sat himself down in the tub and laid himself down as if he was going to sleep.

Before he had the chance to catch some shut-eye, you marched over to the tub and objected, “Rick, if you’re gonna sleep, I want a goodnight kiss first.” Without another word, Rick sat up and planted a kiss on your thigh (since it was closest to him). There was now a bright red imprint of his lips on your leg. “Thank you.” you smiled down at him, “Now goodnight.” “Don’t leave the water on, you hear?” Sav nagged him, pointing a colored finger, “You’ll drown." Rick chuckled with his eyes closed, “I’ll drink myself out. I'm in a drinkin mood, anyways." “Oh yeah? You haven’t got a straw or anything,” the intoxicated bassist continued to argue with him. “Then don’t let me drown! Get one!" “I’ll get you one later. I’ll just-“ Sav burped, and continued, “I’ll write a note or something.” “Sounds good, mate,” Rick slumped further into the tub and pulled the curtain closed, “Now you gonna stay here all night?” “Actually,” you noted out loud to yourself, different alcoholic emotions boiling up inside you, “I wanna go downstairs- I just need to see Steve- like right now...!" You turned on your heels, speeding past Sav and flying back down the stairs. *** “So that explains the paint on my face, and the paper in the hallway, and the lipstick, but what happened after that?” you asked Sav, as you were now slumped on top of Phil’s arm again. “Beats me,” Sav ran his still-painted hands through his hair, “That’s all I’ve got.” “But wait, if you said that Rick fell asleep in the bathtub...” Phil began his sentence, only for you and the other two men to exchange knowing looks with each other. All four of you immediately sprung up and rushed (as much as you could) up the stairs and into the bathroom. Upon getting there, Phil flung back the shower curtain to reveal a partially awake Rick, dressed in a suit, and still wearing the lipstick from the night before. “Mornin’,” he groaned as he stretched, then winced, “Ah, fuck- sleeping in here wasn’t the best idea for me neck.” Sav looked back at the paint on the doorframe and asked the drummer, “So then why did you sleep in here?” “Oh,” Rick looked around the tub, stating as-a-matter-of-factly, “The porcelain keeps the suit from wrinkling. I guess drunk me was very careful last night.” “I’ll say,” Joe complemented, “The lipstick’s still holding up pretty well.” Phil halted the conversation, “Wait, so you were in here when I went to the bathroom in the middle of the night?” Rick chuckled, “Yeah, and let me tell you, for a smaller guy, you’ve got a big bladder.” “Wait,” you slowly turned and pointed at Joe, “I thought you said you slept in the bathtub-?” He gave you a cocky smirk in return, “I told you, ‘definitely not the bathtub’...” Rick sleepily laughed and pointed at you, “Ha- Y/N, you look like Joe!” “Why, just because of the shirt?” you inquired, pointing at Joe’s tank top on you. “And the paint!” Rick corrected you, “I can’t believe you guys didn’t wash it off yet!” In a second, you felt a rush of worry upon realizing that Rick hadn’t said anything about you and Steve yet. It made you suddenly come to the possible conclusion that he may not know about it all. “Wait,” Phil snapped his fingers, “So you do remember some stuff from last night?” “Yeah, a bit, I think. Why?” “Philip Kenneth Collen, don’t you fucking dare....” you growled at him in an almost pleading manner, rubbing your temples and grinding your teeth. “What do you remember?” Phil asked him, not giving any sort of reaction to your begging. Rick thought for a few seconds, clearly as hungover as the rest of you. It didn’t take him long to list off some brief happenings he recalled. “Well, I remember us singing Sweet, there was a lap dance, I remember- uh, being denied a bottle of scotch, there was, uh... there was lipstick... and did I try to ice-skate on pieces of cardboard down the hall...?” “Is that why there’s cardboard all down the hallway?” you motioned towards the door. Rick gave you a big proud smile and a nod in response. “So...” Joe looked around, definitely looking eager, “What’s the last thing you remember before falling asleep?” Rick rested his head back on the tub again, thinking as hard as his hungover mind would let him. You hoped to every god there was that he didn’t say anything about Steve. “Just Phil comin’ in here and having a long piss, that’s all.” came the verdict. “You sure you didn’t hear-“ Phil anxiously began to ask him, but got a hand slapped over his mouth by you. “No!” you yelled on impulse, sending more daggers through your burned-out head. All eyes were now on you, and silence fell. For a few tense seconds, you stared into Phil’s eyes, sending him visual messages of both threats and desperate requests. “...what the hell happened last night?” Rick broke the silence in a tone of utter confusion, knowing that something more serious than what he remembered had taken place. You pulled your hand back from Phil’s face, “Yuck, Phil, come on!” “You licked her hand, didn’t you?” asked Sav. “Yes,” Phil confirmed, and continued without missing a beat, “And I’m glad you asked that, Rick, cos' I know what happened after Y/N and Sav paid you a visit last night.” “Phil, if you love me in any way, shape, or form, you will not tell Rick what happened,” you begged to him as you began to walk out the bathroom door, heading back downstairs to wallow in more of your shameful hangover, “I refuse to believe it happened until there’s hard proof.” “Well what more proof do you want? A positive pregnancy test?” Phil shrugged, but suddenly slapped his own hand over his mouth, realizing what he’d just said. You shot him an angry look. You were too tired to have it out with him, so you stumbled away. Right about now, you were ready to give up and accept the fact that you probably did shag Steve. Phil turned to Rick, gaping, and slowly began to speak again, "Right... so last night, after those two were in here, I think that’s when they came back downstairs..." *** "So why are you tying up my hair again?" a drunk Steve asked Phil, who was happily putting his hair into pigtails. "Because I knew you’d look pretty, and I knew you wouldn't object, either," the other guitarist laughed evilly as he finished tying the second bundle of golden locks together, "There, you're all done now." "Cool... I think," Steve tilted his head, staring at himself in the mirror on the wall as footsteps began pounding their way down the stairs. "I think you look pretty, Steve. Pretty, pretty, pretty," Joe giggled as he was flipped off by the pig-tailed guitarist. As this happened, you trampled the stairs in your descent, calling out, “Steve- Steve! Come here!” More than happy to be ripped away from Phil’s pigtailed plans, he let you run up to him as you belted out, “I’ve got an idea...!” He didn’t say anything, but he did let you whisper something in his ear. The second he heard your idea, his eyes lit up and an evil smirk crossed his face. Steve was always in the mood for causing terror. You pulled back and exchanged the same look of understanding with the guitarist. He stared at you with a sort of appreciation, and without another word, swept you off your feet, carrying you bridal style now. With a quick smooch to your lips, he began carrying you up the stairs as you giggled with some sort of glee. Phil’s jaw dropped, looking at Joe with astonishment in the process. The singer’s face mirrored the exact same expression. “I should’ve bloody known...” Phil gasped in astonishment, “She’s been eyeing him up real funny all night... I can’t fucking believe it!” Sav came down the stairs slowly, his life depending on the railing as he dragged his hand on it. He left a long streak of blue paint as he did so. “What’s gotten into their pants?” “Each other, apparently,” Joe scoffed, taking a sip of a beer he found, “Lord knows how the hell that happened.” *** You were all sitting back on the couches in the living room, all seemingly regretting the night before (you knew you most certainly were). Everyone knew that the end of Phil’s story was the true ending of the night. Now there was really a dead end to the whole tale. “I can’t believe it,” you whispered with sorrowful acceptance, “Me and Steve...? What happened next?” Joe scoffed, “Well that’s kind of a stupid question.” “That’s where it ends, Y/N. I went up to bed afterwards, only to hear-“ Phil cleared his throat to impersonate you and Steve, “‘Oh, Steve! Yes!’ coming from my room! So after an immense helping of disapproval, I slept in Rick’s room.” “No, no, that can’t be it!” you insisted, “Guys, what really happened next?” “Can’t say,” Joe mumbled, holding his head. “Sorry, mate,” Rick apologized. Sav remained silent, but looked apologetic. “That can’t be where it ends...!” you persisted, “Sav? Tell me I’m right!” Sav rolled in his lips, and darted his eyes away from you. You continued to stare at him suspiciously, but no one else thought anything of it. Phil tried to finalize your fate sympathetically, “Give it up, Y/N, at least it’s all over now.” “But it still happened! What am I gonna say to Steve when he wakes up? You know what- no. It didn’t happen, I refuse to believe that it did.” “How much more proof do you want?” Rick shrugged, pointing at Phil and Sav, trying to make you face the terrible truth, “They both heard ya, and Steve even gave you a hickey.” You hung your head, thinking you might just decide to cry out of shame. Yes, you loved Steve, just as you loved anyone else in the band, but you never had (or planned to have) any sort of sexual relationship with them. Even if you ever did, you were afraid it would ruin everything your friendship had stood for. “Sav, what’s wrong, mate?” Joe asked out of the blue. The bassist in question was still avoiding the conversation, staying eerily silent and weaving his hands together. At this point, you noticed that he was also blushing. “That wasn’t Steve.” he stated bluntly, still not looking at you. “What wasn’t Steve?” you asked as you stared at him dead on, your heart now pounding. “That hickey... that wasn’t Steve,” he paused, “That was me.” Immediately you gasped and slapped a hand over the mark on your neck. “What?!” the other three exclaimed. Joe and Rick immediately hissed at the searing pain their outbursts caused. “Sav, what the hell?!” you scolded him, finally happy that you weren’t the only one being called out for their mistakes. “Now before you say anything else,” he finally looked at you and held up a hand, “It was your idea.” Your face fell, softly asking him, “What do you mean?” “Well, after you and Steve-you know- and only Joe and I were downstairs, you actually came back down, too- wipe that smug look off your face, Joe. You’re not entirely innocent here, either.” *** You stumbled down the stairs, giggling to yourself. Your mission was now accomplished, and Steve was asleep upstairs. In a word, you were pleased. In two words, you were still drunk. Records were still being played when you returned to the living room, and Joe currently had his copy of Sheer Heart Attack on the turntable. “She Makes Me (Stormtrooper In Stilettos)”flowed softly from its speakers. “There’s our killer queen!” Joe cooed to you happily. He was now sprawled out on the couch, two empty beer bottles on the floor beside him. Sav wasn’t too far off. The paints on his hands were now dry, and he was reclined in a chair across the room, twiddling a bottle in his hand. They both looked ready for bed, and it made you wonder how they held out for this long. The singer slurred on with an interested smirk, “You two have fun?" Sav spoke up with a scoff-like laugh, “Sure sounded like it!" “Oh, you know it,” you gave them a wink, setting yourself down on the couch next to Joe, “Guess Phil finally ditched, huh?” “Yeah, the wanker went to bed- but you’ve lost your pants!” he gestured to your black underwear, made room for you to lay down with him, and took you in his arms like a teddy bear with a sigh of appeasement. You reached back and playfully poked at Joe’s dimple, “Steve's fault." “Well, that’s no good,” Sav objected, pushing the footrest of the chair in and returning to a sitting position. “What isn’t?” Joe asked him, "Steve gettin' into it with her?" “No, that cuddlin' you're doing- it’s boring. You stay like that, you’ll fall asleep on me!” He was certainly right about this. With you in Joe’s arms and his face nuzzling into your hair like some sort of animal, he was already falling asleep. “What do you want us to do?” you chuckled, thinking that Sav was only jealous of his friend. Joe mumbled happily into your hair, “How 'bout you just do me like Steve, and we’ll be good.” At this point, you noticed the feeling of something pressing lightly against the bottom of your back; a certain weight where Joe’s hips were, and a weight that wasn’t there at first. “Joe,” you whined at him, “You’re fucking gross.” He chuckled, then slowly moved his hips to lightly rub himself against you, a low quiet moan rising in his throat from the temporary pleasure it provided. “Ah- Joe!” you protested again, reaching back and hitting him as best as you could. You wiggled out of his embrace as he burst into giggles like he had just accomplished something. Sav, on the other hand, cringed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re even hornier than when you’re sober!” you grabbed a pillow and whacked Joe with it. “You’re one to talk! You just shagged Steve!” he smirked evilly, "Why not me?" “Ha! The only way I’ll do you is by some miracle, or at least a dare,” you threw yourself onto the other couch, picking up a nearly empty beer bottle and pouring whatever was left into your mouth. Sav’s eyes finally lit up, “That’s what we oughta do- truth or dare!” “Ooh, sounds like terrible fun,” you turned yourself so you were sitting upside-down on the couch, “Sav, truth or dare?” “How come he gets to go first?” asked Joe, “I wanna get down to business!” “Dare,” Sav declared, ignoring the singer’s objections. Immediately, your intoxicated mind thought of a scheme. Despite the plan you and Steve had executed ever so perfectly, you were still a child seeking more terror. You knew Joe wanted you, and it was no secret either, so how exactly would you use Sav to reign terror over him? You wanted something to rub in Joe’s face- something that would leave a mark on him. “I dare you to-" you clumsily pointed to your neck, "Gimme a hickey.” Joe's jaw dropped with offense and jealousy; exactly as you had expected. Sav began to laugh rather loudly at the request, and stood up, now understanding your true intention of making Joe jealous. “C’mere,” he motioned with his hand. More than happy to obey the command, you strutted over to him and paused, waiting for him to make the first move. He took a step so your bodies were practically pressing together, moved your hair out of the way on your neck, and dove right in. You smiled with glee, taking in the feeling of Sav’s mouth and tongue moving over your skin (as well as Joe’s groans of protest coming from a few feet away). As the bassist sucked on your neck without hesitation, it only made you think of one thing: “Wow, there’s definitely gonna be a mark after this.” *** Rick and Phil were staring at Sav with their mouths open in shock. You kept a hand over the mark he left on your neck to prevent everyone from looking any more than they already had. “So, wait, if it was you who gave me this, why didn’t you say anything before when we said it was Steve?” you asked Sav, more suspicious than outraged now. “I- ah, didn’t... wanna say anything...” he looked away, beginning to blush again, “I guess I was too embarrassed." “I think the only person who should be embarrassed is you, Joe,” Rick turned his attention back to the singer, “You fuckin dry humped her!” Joe exclaimed in his own defense, “Yeah, and I don’t even remember it! It’s not my fault- I was drunk and horny!” “See! Just like me and Steve! I don’t remember shagging him, either! So I guess we’re even.” “Even Stephen,” Phil scoffed. You slumped into the couch more, staring blankly ahead and realizing, “So I pretty much got to second base with all of you last night...?” “I think you made it all the way home with Steve,” Rick pointed out. “Thanks, Rick,” you kept your head hung, “I feel like a slut.” “You mean you’re not?” Phil joked, only to be hit in the arm by Sav.

Just then, you all heard the sound of movement upstairs. Your heart stopped and your blood ran cold; Steve was awake now. Everyone's jaws hit the floor, and for a second, you thought they were all afraid of what you were fearing. "He's awake..." Rick announced in a sing-song voice, teasing you. “Oh no...” you gasped quietly, “Oh no, oh no! Oh god, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna say to him?!” “Hate to break it to ya, but this isn’t necessarily our problem!” Joe shrugged in a panic, hearing Steve’s footsteps get closer. “But guys! You’ve gotta help me! You’re his best friends! What should I say to him?!” “Just act like it didn’t happen! Maybe he doesn’t remember-?” Sav proposed. Rick suggested, “Just straight up ask him if he remembers anything!” “Just get out of here!” Phil made a swatting motion towards the other room. “None of those are gonna do me any good! It still happened!” you yelled at them in a whisper, “I have to live that with that fact, even if neither of us have any memory of it to live with!” It was too late for any salvation; Steve was already at the top of the stairs. The band members held their breath, and- without words or warning- all scrambled out of the living room. “No!” you whispered, “Guys- wait!” You caught Rick by the wrist when he stood up. “Rick, c’mon, please don’t leave me here!” you begged. He yanked out of your grip and apologetically condemned you, “Sorry, Y/N, but this is your business.” As the four of them retreated, you tried to bolt after them. As soon as you hit the doorway, however, Phil turned around and pushed you back on the couch nearby as slowly as he could. It was so sudden that you were on your back before you knew it, and they were all gone. “Hey!” you called out after them, “Assholes!” Steve’s voice suddenly came to your ears (rather closely, too), “What’s their problem?” You jumped, “Ah- Steve!” He had a silent step, and made it down the stairs and across the room without making a sound. He also looked just as he did a little while ago when you first woke up; scraggly hair, lipstick stains all over his face, but no visible evidence of a hangover. “Hey, wow,” you forced an awkward chuckle at him, “Nice- uh, nice- lipstick...” Steve slumped down onto a chair and grumbled, “Thanks. Who even did this to me? Doesn’t look like it was you.” “That was, that was Rick- I’m assuming... I don’t remember that happening and I don’t think he does, either. He’s still got the lipstick on, too.” He played off the remark with a tired smile, “Oh, nice... last night really was something, wasn’t it?” Heat rushed to your face, and you tried to look away without being conspicuous. “Ha ha... yeah... really something!” you faked your amusement for him, now wondering if he was implying anything about the previous night. Steve leaned forward and asked, “Do you remember Sav and the paint? That was pretty funny, wasn’t it?” Still blushing, you darted your eyes around the room and nodded in agreement, “Mm hmm, yeah... he was like a toddler or something.” He sunk back into the chair again and closed his eyes, reminiscing about the events of the previous night. For a second you thought you were in the clear, and that maybe he didn’t remember the specific event that Phil and Sav did.

That illusion was shattered when his eyes snapped open, whispering “Wait a minute”, and sitting back up. Immediately, your heart dropped into your stomach.

“How did our plan go?” he questioned quietly, figuring that the others were still somewhere nearby and listening. “P-plan?” you stuttered, partially afraid of what he meant, but partially caught off guard, “What plan?” “You know-” he whispered again, thinking you remembered, “It was your idea. Did they believe it? We were convincing enough?" You darted your eyes down to the floor, confused, but also embarrassed. 'Convincing'? What did that mean? "Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t remember!” he smiled playfully. As you stared at him with fearful confusion in your eyes and redness on your cheeks, his smile was suddenly wiped away. He muttered under his breath as his face fell, "Oh... you don't remember... bloody hell, okay, this is gonna be hard to explain..." "Then explain it, because I'm really fucking confused..." your voice wavered with a sarcastic chuckle. Steve sighed and leaned forward, slowly weaving his hands together. He didn't know where to begin. "This is one of the few things I remember from last night..." he started off, "And there's no way to make this sound... good... in any way, but you came up with the idea of us pretending to shag- like making noises and shit like that- to trick the others into thinking we really did. For some reason I thought it was a great idea, and I'm pretty sure I carried you upstairs, too.” Instantly, a huge weight was lifted off your shoulders. It wasn't real; you didn't shag Steve, and he could even tell the guys himself! You blew out a big sigh of relief, and slumped back into the couch, closing your eyes. "Oh, god," you slowly panted, "What a huge relief- I suppose we were really convincing, then." "Why d'you say that?" You laughed tiredly, now feeling rather thankful for your raging hangover, "The guys are all convinced that we fucked last night. Only Phil and Sav seem to remember it, though. They've been hounding me about it all morning. I kept telling them it couldn't be true- and I was right!" "What, would it be so bad if we actually did?" he teased you in a hushed voice. "Well, I've had to live my day so far under the impression it did happen. I was teased, ridiculed, embarrassed, and felt guilty about it. I was afraid it'd ruin our friendship if it was true... I was kinda hoping you didn't remember so we could just forget..." The red in your face returned all over again. Steve, however, didn't seem bothered. "If you really want to, we can keep pretending it happened and steer into the act; give em' what they want." "What? No!" you laughed out loud, standing up, "You're crazy, Clark! I think I better go tell the others the bad news. They'll be disappointed-ha!" You walked across the room to go find the others and disclose unto them the "bad news", giving Steve a pat on the shoulder when you passed him. Once you were gone and out of sight, Steve also blew out a big sigh of relief. "She didn't remember anything," he thought to himself, "That was a close one." While he knew you two didn't go all the way the previous night, he figured if you didn't remember it, then it was for the best you didn't find out. It was nothing serious; just a bit of fooling around, really. Just a bit of drunked-up teasing, and nothing more. The guys had no proof that anything actually happened between you two, and you were about to tell them the partial truth anyway, so why say something to reignite the suspicion? After all, they were all hungover to begin with, so there wasn't much memory of the whole affair, either. "Thank god for these hangovers,"Steve thought, "Thank god. I couldnt've asked for anything more." ~Epilogue~ When you got to the top of the stairs, Steve put you on your feet and spun you around. "You ready?" he whispered, childish excitement in his voice. You nodded with equal excitement, "Take me away, Clark." The two of you began eagerly walking hand-in-hand to whatever room you pleased, but before either of you had the chance to pick one, the bathroom door opened, Rick popped his head out and commanded, "Stop right there!" Both you and Steve froze and looked at him. He still had his lipstick and his suit on, and a kind of serious look overtaking his face. A finger was kept in a pointing position at you, a few large pieces of cardboard were underneath his other arm, and he slowly took steps down the hall to meet you. Neither of you moved, but both of you waited. When Rick got to you, he didn't say a word, but did take Steve's face in his hands (dropping the cardboard in the process), and proceeded to the kiss the man all over his face.

Steve remained silent, and let Rick have his way until he decided to stop. When he did, there were several lipstick stains on various parts of the blonde's face.

"Thanks, mate," Steve muttered sarcastically as Rick kicked some of the cardboard pieces in different directions. He then stepped on two of them, trying to slide down the hall on them as if they were ice skates. When he got back to the bathroom, he went back inside and shut the door again.

Without another word, you turned Steve's face toward you, gave him a peck on the cheek as Rick had done, and kicked open the door behind you (which just so happened to be Phil's bedroom). You both fell back into the room, giggling with makeshift lust in your eyes.

After all, you had to make this authentic, right?

#def leppard #def leppard fanfic #def leppard x reader fanfic #def leppard x reader #steve clark #phil collen #rick savage #rick allen #joe elliott #original content #i'm still proud of this ngl #it was hard tying up the loose ends but i had a LOT of fun writing this throughout 2018

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ordinaryschmuck · 3 years

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Starkid Musicals Ranked from Worst to Best

Salutations to you, random people on the internet who most certainly won’t read this. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

Welp. I finally did it. I've watched the entire Starkid musical library, and I must say, most of these plays fit my writing style perfectly:

Humor that is cynical yet random

Leaning in with comedy while sprinkling in some well-executed drama

An understanding that any type of story works as long as the cast of varying personalities of characters is dynamic enough to result in some phenomenal chemistry.

This is in almost all of their plays, excelled through fantastic writing and stellar performances driving the overall quality. And it inspired me not only to review each musical, but also ranking them all from worst to best. Or, more accurately, least good to most good. Because even at their "worst," Starkid still provides a funny, enjoyable experience that will keep you laughing with its comedy and your toes tapping with its catchy music. So strap in as I go in-depth into how Starkid proves how they are the masters of humor and melody.

(I'll also provide links to each musical, which is all for free on YouTube, so you can check them out yourselves. Just know that their early work is impossible to enjoy without subtitles, so you might want to have Closed Captions on when watching.)

#12-Holy Musical B@man-Everything about this play makes it seem like it's the weakest to me. The jokes, songs, and characters in Holy Musical B@tman just don't hit as hard as Starkid's other plays. It's still good, but compared to their best, the cracks show a lot more. That is, except for the ending. Not only is there a great speech that shows what makes superheroes so beloved, but "Super Friends" might just be my favorite finale song Starkid has ever put out. Holy Musical B@tman may not be the best, but it's at least worth the time.

#11-Firebringer-This was stupid. Really stupid. Funny as f**k, but still pretty stupid. Although I will give credit to one of the central pairings being LGBTQA+...Even though it makes little to no sense based on the characters' previous interactions. But in fairness, Starkid really sucks at writing good romantic relationships, so at least Firebringer has the benefit of being gay. And as we all know: The gayer, the better. The play is still stupid, though.

#10-Me and My Dick-The world in this musical makes little to no sense. Penises and vaginas are sentient and can communicate with their humans. And yet the penises and vaginas can also talk with each other, form relationships, leave their humans, and reinsert themselves into others--Yeah, it makes no sense...But, DAMN, is it funny! Every joke and innuendo Me and My Dick has about human anatomy works, and I could not stop laughing at each of them. Especially the names that were given to the vaginas, which are just...I mean, I'm laughing just by thinking about them. That should tell you how funny they are. This play might be illogical in every way, but if you turn your brain off and watch it for the humor, you'll definitely be in for something fun.

#9-ANI: A Parody-What's weird about ANI is that its best qualities are also weaknesses. A good chunk of the jokes are hilarious and expertly delivered. The issue is that most of them are about taking potshots at the Star Wars prequels, which might be the laziest jokes to make in a Star Wars parody. Then there's the soundtrack, having several songs that are a bop to listen to. The problem is that ANI suffers from the same issues as Tarzan and Brother Bear: Yes, technically, it is a musical, but it's one where none of the characters sing, and some people in the background do all the singing instead. It's all an odd balancing act of quality content made through questionable choices. ANI is still an entertaining play, but the force isn't as strong with this one.

#8-Black Friday-This might be the least funny play that Starkid has ever put out. Not just because it leans extra hard into drama, which was pretty effective during certain scenes. It's just when there are jokes in Black Friday, they tend to fall flatter more here than they did in other plays. Also, the plot of Black Friday might not be the best one to play straight. The serious moments work best when focusing on the characters and their personal struggles, but through the big bad that's supposed to be threatening? Not so much. Even if it was meant to be funny, well, I wasn't laughing. And believe it or not, I consider that to be the best judge of whether or not something is funny. That being said, while Black Friday isn't the most humorous Starkid musical, it's still pretty good. The characters are excellent, the songs are awesome, and the story is somewhat easy to follow. I would have appreciated a few more laughs, but I can respect these talented people wanting to challenge their strengths.

#7-Starship-This play feels very...Disney. It follows a familiar formula we've seen several times: The main character wants more than what he has in his crappy life, miraculously gets the exact thing he wants, falls in love with a girl in a short amount of time, faces off against a campy/over the top villain, realizes the hand he's been dealt isn't so bad, and in the end, gets what he wants anyway. Starship is still pretty entertaining through its jokes, characters, and songs, but it also feels weird that Starkid leans into these tropes when they would eventually make a much better play by making fun of them. The end result is not bad in the slightest, but it's also nowhere near their best.

#6-A Very Potter Musical-Starkid's first production, and boy, what a start to something wonderful. Every one of their gimmicks and motifs is present in A Very Potter Musical. The use of parody to playfully mock characters and stories they love, making songs that are as funny as they are emotional, and creating characters that work because of their lines and the actors' performances. Oh, and also, it's funny. And it’s not just through a parody angle, like making Cedric be a perfect boy who's always smiling. It's also funny through its jokes that work, even if you ignore the fact that it’s a parody altogether. Case in point, there are these two bits, one involving Voldemort and Beatrix with the other involving Ron and Hermoine, that are written and delivered so well that I was in tears much more than with any other Starkid play. When watching A Very Potter Musical, you'll not only understand how parody works, but you'll also gain an understanding of why Starkid turned out as successful as they did.

#5-The Trail to Oregon-What can I say? I'm a sucker for comedic dysfunctional families. And seeing a family of idiots make their way to Oregon via The Oregon Trail parody? Yeah, that's a win for me. The play may be another family road trip narrative, which some people might get sick of at this point. But because the dynamics and comedic chemistry everyone has with each other are on point, the end result proves that you don't need an original story to tell an entertaining one. Although I will say that out of all of Starkid's productions, The Trail to Oregon has by far the worst ending. Without giving anything away, the play spends way too much time on this one stupid joke that any of the characters could make. Comedy is defined by personalities, as are most things, so making the joke work for anyone is a bad move when this one, in particular, doesn't fit as well for some characters as it would for others. Plus, the finale song "Naked in a Lake" is a really poor choice to cap off this musical. It's catchy, but to me, a finale song should encapsulate everything about the story, characters, and themes. Not paying off a joke that I honestly wouldn't want the payoff for. So while the ending could have used a lot more polish, that doesn't change how The Trail to Oregon is a pretty funny play that I won't mind revisiting when I have the chance.

#4-A Very Potter Sequel-Hey, sometimes a sequel is better than the original. Sure some jokes don't land, and some story beats aren't as impactful as they thought they were (Serious Black's introduction, for example), but there are far more improvements to this play than the last one. The performances are stronger, the jokes are funnier, the music is catchier, and the characters are much more entertaining in this play than in A Very Potter Musical. Especially new additions like Lupin and Lucious Malfoy, who provide great comedy and sublime drama at times. And Umbridge. Sweet Mother of all that is holy, Umbridge. While A Very Potter Sequel never made me laugh to tears as the first play did, twice, Professor Umbridge carries the comedy so well that she surpasses all of that. Plus, on top of it all, this play nails its ending through a bittersweet note that really captures what makes Hogwarts so special to these characters. I always feel like Starkid's plays tend to lose steam during the last few minutes, but A Very Potter Sequel is one of the few instances that it just builds and builds to a perfect ending. A Very Potter Sequel might not always hit the right marks, but the results are just magical when it does get it right.

#3-The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals-This one is pretty clever. The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals is one of those stories that manages to be explicitly hilarious yet implicitly disturbing. For instance, people suddenly bursting into perfectly choreographed musical numbers in a world where songs are exclusively diegetic is pretty funny (especially through the characters' reactions to it). However, knowing what happens to these people and why they sing and dance so expertly helps make the whole situation pretty dire. It's an excellent balancing act that not many stories can accomplish. And while The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals leans one way or the other at times, it's still all handled really well. Oh, and also, you know how most people say the villain song is the best one in any musical? Well, technically speaking, nearly every song in The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals is the villain song. Including the finale, which is just too brilliant for me not to give a round of applause. If you're a person who unfortunately doesn't like musicals either, I'd say be more than willing to give this one a chance. It's funny, catchy, and if you think of the implications, pretty damn disturbing.

#2-A Very Potter Senior Year-...You know how Avengers: Endgame is a bit of a mess, yet people still love it for how much of a perfect (sort of) finale it is? It's the same regard with A Very Potter Senior Year in my eyes. It's far from a masterpiece, but the many, many solid scenes that cap off this series help make me willing to overlook the mistakes. The characters, callbacks, and overall message about how things end was done so expertly well that I physically can’t hate this one. I can understand how it's more of an ok play when compared to the rest of Starkid's productions, but sometimes, ok is wonderful.

#1-Twisted: An Untold Story of a Royal Vizier-...It's Twisted. Everyone loves Twisted! And how could they not? Everything about this play just screams Starkid at their best. The comedy is uproarious, added with the fantastic delivery of the actors and the characters' personalities. Everyone feels as though they have one step in reality and the other in insanity. This, to me, seems like the best type of character work when going for the parody angle. Parody is about giving slight yet snide remarks toward the work you're mocking, which I feel works best when characters drop the suspension of disbelief audiences have when enjoying such a story. And Twisted definitely nails its satire in not only poking fun at Aladdin but also making jokes towards Disney as a brand. From their movies to their inside jokes to their formulas to even their corporate dealings with Pixar, nothing about Disney is sacred in Twisted. But on top of being funny, Twisted might just be the most successful Starkid has been with telling some really compelling drama. The jokes allow themselves to take a back seat to let serious moments play out, and even comedy is added, it provides more for the experience rather than taking anything away. You see this not only through the actors giving it their all but even through some really gorgeous and heart wrenching musical numbers. Oh, and also, Twisted has the best Starkid soundtrack, featuring songs that are epic, funny, and, as I said, heartbreaking. You cannot get better than this and, if you want to get a friend interested in Starkid as a whole, this might be the play for them. Scheherazade may have a thousand tales, but his one is a tale I wouldn't mind hearing for a thousand nights.

And that's about how I feel about Starkid and each and every one of their plays. Odds are your ranking would be much different from mine, and I'm all for that differing opinions. Feel free to make your own ranking if you want because I'm honestly curious where fans would place these plays above or below others. I'm relatively new to enjoying their work, so I have no idea what the consensus is. I do know one thing, though: If Starkid can still be incredibly entertaining through over ten years of content, then I am excited to see what they can accomplish next in another ten years.

#starkid #holy musical b@man #firebringer #me and my dick #ani: a parody #black friday #a very potter trilogy #the trail to oregon #the guy who didn't like musicals #twisted: the untold story of a royal vizier

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oneletterelliot · 3 years

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Hot Sauce (NCT Dream) - liveblog reaction

Disclaimer: I did listen to this album once through already, plus the previews and whatnot, so this is not quite a first impression reaction.

Hot Sauce - Is it just me or do the opening shouty vocals not sound like any of the dreamies? Chenle’s line. I was NOT ready for how low his voice was? It sounds so good. The mumbly nonsense bit sounds kinda like that one song that gets memed a bunch, doesn’t it? The vocal quality to Jeno’s rapping here really reminds me of how he sounded in “Misfit.” I think I like it. Lots of good harmony moments. Renjun’s voice is lovely as always. I’m digging his and Chenle’s harmonizing in the bridge. Haechan’s high note. Yes. I like the beat of this song. Definitely makes me want to dance. Mark going, “I’m the one!” I’m a fan. More “Hot Sauce” thoughts here.

Diggity - Okay, so based of the dreamverse (that’s what it’s called, right?) video, I said here that I didn’t love the song but I liked the choreography a lot. Not loving the song is holding up for now, but it definitely has the vibe of one of those NCT songs that I don’t originally care for but the more I listen to it, the more I like it (see also “Punch”). It is pretty catchy. Renjun’s voice is swaying me, I’ll admit. Also I do really like the instrumental. I think it’s the rap I’m not sold on (yet). Is that Jisung’s low voice at 2:49 underneath the higher harmonies? I’m kind of into it. God, I didn’t even watch the dreamverse video that much but I can so clearly picture the choreo while listening to this song, it’s that good.

Dive Into You - I love this opening arpeggio instrumental. Thinking about Jisung’s voice again. I always forget how much I it. I really like the chorus, nice harmony and fun melody. Renjun’s and Haechan’s ad libs (I think it’s them at least) make me happy. 2:07, Jisung’s voice again? (Edit: I looked it up and yes, of course, it’s Jisung. It’s just that for a second I thought it could be Chenle because...) Tbh my brain has been rattled by Chenle’s lower register he displayed in “Hot Sauce.” I want more of it. Is that Renjun who closes the song? Sounds good. (Edit: It’s CHENLE actually. Uh-oh, Renjun, look out, he might be coming for your crown as my favorite NCT Dream vocalist lmao.)

My Youth - This song sounds SO coming-of-age movie. Of course it’s called “My Youth.” I know I keep gushing about Renjun’s voice, but he always sounds so good holy shit. Jisung’s voice again! I guess I’m gonna keep gushing about him too. Oh, Mark, you sound amazing too. Whoever is rapping at the 2 minute mark (Jaemin?), the cadence of this bit really reminds of the “baby, it’s 4:35 / maybe I’m barely alive” part of Maroon 5’s “Girls Like You” lmao. Mashup, when? The “ooh-ooh-ooh”s over the chorus sound amazing. Oh my god, the harmony in the bridge is SO GOOD. My brain couldn’t even focus on thinking about which of the Dream vocal trio was singing it, but damn, it was so good. (Edit: According to the lyric video I looked it, it was Renjun/Chenle harmony I was reacting to, and then a Chenle/Jisung harmony! Jisung’s harmonies this album have been really nice!!)

Rocket - Funky start. Supremely makes me want to dance. I think this would be a cha cha, but there is something a little samba-y about the beat. I know I, like, haven’t said anything about the vocals—I do like them—I’m just enjoying this beat / instrumental so much. No thoughts, only vibing. Digging the vocal mixing of the chorus. I’m shoulder-dancing in my seat as I listen to this. “Yeah, yeah!” Strong contender for my favorite song off the album. Shit, maybe it is a samba? Man, it’s been so long since I’ve gotten to ballroom dance :(

Countdown (3, 2, 1) - Oh, what time is it? IS THAT CHENLE’S ICONIC DOLPHIN LAUGH UNDER MARK’S VOICE? Renjun’s voice here reminds me a bit of “Ridin’,” so you know I like it because I believe in Renjun “Ridin’” supremacy. This also might end up being a song that I don’t really like until I listen to it a several more times. You know that thing in the instrumental that sounds like “90s Love?” Yeah. Mark sounds good in this song. I bet this song samples something. Not clue what. But I just Feel™ it does. Haechan’s high note at the end of the bridge did not do it for me, sorry bud :( Oh, I guess I like Mark’s “tick tick tock” bit.

ANL - Intro feels VERY similar to “Dive Into You,” doesn’t it? Same kind of feeling with the arpeggios, yeah? Like “My Youth,” it would feel right at home in a coming-of-age movie. 1:12, did they just say, “Yeah, we can bang all day?” “YEAH, I GIVE IT TO YOU EVERY NIGHT” ?!?!?!?!?!??! IS THIS A SONG ABOUT SEX? IT SOUNDS LIKE IT MIGHT BE A SONG ABOUT SEX? (No comment on the fact that “ANL” looks like............. well, you know.) (Edit: So apparently it’s “we can PAINT all day,” but the other line is actually “I give it to you every night,” which is, hmm, well.) 1:51, is this Jaemin? I like it a surprisingly large amount. (Edit: Yes, it’s Jaemin. Is this the comeback that makes me fall in love with his rapping? Hmm.) This song also makes me want to dance, but in a different way than “Hot Sauce” or “Rocket.” RENJUN IN THE BRIDGE?! THE HARMONY?! VERY NICE HONESTLY. Is this Jisung after the bridge at 2:53? Wow, I really do like his voice, huh? (Edit: yes, it’s Jisung, so jk, Jaemin, the rapper I’m falling in love with this come back is him and not you.) The line “I want to be your sunshine, girl” makes me cringe. The type of English line they’d give to Johnny in an NCT 127 song.

Irreplaceable - This song is SO funky, and I love it. I’ve said before that Haechan’s voice isn’t my favorite (I acknowledge he’s a very good singer; the tonal quality of it just doesn’t appeal to me personally), but it does fit this song very well. Kind of has a Motown, Jackson 5 vibe, which I really dig. Another song that makes me want to dance. Another contender for — did Jaemin just say “climax” (1:31)? I’m sorry? (Edit: Look, I know that’s not an inherently sex-related word, and that’s obviously not how it’s being used here, but it’s just a funny word to be used for the one random English word in the middle of the song, you know?) — my favorite song off the album. “Yeah, we about to hug and kiss,” okay, Mark. I don’t know why, but I really want to do the “Touch” dance with the arms to this song?

Be There For You - It makes sense to put the ballad after the bop that was “Irreplaceable.” I haven’t really been following all the promotional material for this album, but this is a vocal trio unit song, right? It kind of reminds of “My Everything.” Like, there’s a range of type of NCT ballad, and I think this and “My Everything” fall into the same category. 1:22, god, Renjun, your voice is so good. (I know my favoritism is showing so hard but whatever, I don’t care. I love his voice.) I like the backing harmonies. Very soft. I probably won’t listen to this song much, simply because I don’t listen to ballads much (Chinese ballads notwithstanding) but I do like it.

Rainbow - Back to the coming-of-age vibes like in “Dive Into You” and “ANL.” I can’t decide if I like the similar vibes for cohesiveness of the album or if I dislike it because I think they’re too similar. Wow, this is really a “get your lighter and/or cellphone out and wave in the air” kind of song, huh. Rap at 1:40 (Jisung?), I like it. (Sorry, the title “Rainbow” is just reminding me of how I recently told my parents, “oh, I think this guy I went to high school with is queer because he has the rainbow flag emoji in his insta bio,” and my dad said, “maybe he just really likes colors.” PLEASE.) The harmonies are nice. Renjun’s ad libs towards the end (3:05-3:17 ish), yes. I like the song, it won’t be a favorite, but this is a nice note to end the album on.

Over all thoughts: It’s a good album. Really enjoyable and definitely feels cohesive. I love the mix of peppy, dancey energy and this kind of soft yearning coming-of-age feeling. It makes a lot of sense for NCT Dream’s first full album. Chenle and Jisung are both pleasantly surprising me, and I’m looking forward to seeing how their voices continue to develop in the future. (Side note: SM, please let Chenle sing in his lower register more! His high voice is lovely, but so is his low voice!) Favorite songs currently are “Rocket” and “Irreplaceable.”

#nct dream #hot sauce #nct #e liveblogs nct #e has thoughts

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whatifyoulivelikethat · 3 years

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what are bangtan songs u find the most unique , in terms of musicality and meaning ?

dis-ease probably is the most unique for me meaning-wise ,, honestly talking about ur attitude towards the work you do is not soemtbign I've heard people sing about . even paldogangsan is so well written and just about brotherhood across the country despite the cultural barriers and it could translate to even an international divide. musically probably has to be black swan and butterfly.

if u haven't already please listent to the prolougue remix of butterfly ! !

The song that really caught me was 'Baepsae'. This song was my life growing up, hearing these words from the generation above me every day, "if I can do it, you can do it", fuck, so fucking annoying, you lived through an economic boom, of course everything was easy, you idiot. Before that I've never heard a song that detailed that frustration to the older generation, esp because in Asian countries you're supposed to respect your elders and I spent a lot of my youth telling them to fuck off. XD I think there's only a few (maybe only 1?) music broadcasts of 'Baepsae' too, because the older generation got offended, LOL good you fuck-

*cough* anyway

'Dead Leaves' - the meaning of this song details a dying relationship slowly falling apart and there's one particular person it makes me think of. It perfectly captures that feeling of knowing something is going to end, hell, it needs to end, but still not wanting it to. Although I don't want to be with that person, it was a very important time in my life and every time I hear this song, I think everything about it is exqusite, the lyrics, the melody, the way it was delivered.

'Dionysus' - maybe not the most unique? But actually, I kind of think it is, at least for BTS as a group, they don't usually do things like this. Almost like refined rock, the heavy bass line, mmm, I love it. If I had a WWE opening when I walked into the room, it would be this LMAO (and Jin screaming, fuck, can you tell I love this song?) AND THE EDM MIX UGHHH yes this song is me on the outside (and Agust D - 'People' is me on the inside), thank you Hoseok for this masterpiece!!

'Go Go' - I just think this song is 1) hilarious and 2) has a really cool beat. The flute / xylophone feel repeating the same-ish melody but then their voices bring you through the layers of the song. It's like how rappers have songs about spending big money but make it fucking adorable and actually relatable to the everyday young adult. It's kinda weird but also so cleverly done XD I play this song when I'm online shopping pfft

'Telepathy' - "You're only putting this on here because this is Yoongi's song." Fuck yeah I am, I'm biased and for good reason, this song fucking slaps. Everyone's on the retro hype train but this is the one that really takes me back; it makes me think of summer nights and arcades and cosmic bowling all day. I know everyone loves 'Dynamite', and I do too, but the lyrics of 'Telepathy' are a little sad paired with a beat that's a whole lot happy and that juxtoposition, mmm. I also love the ad libs and little bits at the end of the lyrics (like parenthesis and it reminds me if myself XD you can see this style in 'best laid plans'). Overall this whole retro style is done 1) better than most, 2) highlights the unique color and flavor of everyone's voice (JK??? You can tell Yoongi likes his voice lol), 3) is actually a fucking bop with deep meaning, 4) created by my favorite wrinkly brain and absolute cutie, 5) no I will not shut up about Min Yoongi

Give me a whole BTS album prod. SUGA PLEASE HYBE / BIG HIT / WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU ALL ARE

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twofootedbones · 3 years

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Give Me Your Answer Do

Summary: Something inside Logan's head was telling him that this wasn't a situation he wanted to be in anymore, whether it be Deceit's doing or his own brain, Logan selectively listens to the sounds. The other sides pound on the doors to bring the logical side back to the light, but the singing metal had become accustomed to the darkness.

Old fic, so please forgive any cannon errors!

‘They’re not going to listen to you,’

The voice grew louder.

‘They’re never going to listen to you,’

It started to make sense, but after hearing the repeated words they would lose their edge.

‘You might be a light side, but you’ll never be one of them,’

Logan wasn’t an emotion. Logan was the brain, Logan was logical thinking, Logan was thinking.

It’s obvious how the other sides would have a sort of bias against him because of this, but it still managed to hurt when all the emotions get their own way simply because there are more of them. Logan was alone in his accounts, he wasn’t like all the others, and because of this, they deemed it okay to not have to treat him like the others. They hurled insults at him faster and more often than at each other. They were all ever so quick to shut anything and everything he had down. Yet, the sweet small amounts of praise he gets when he's finally seen equal at the end of a video was exhilarating. Frustrating, he meant frustrating. Just as the conflict outside raged on, the conflict inside continued.

‘Just duck out now,’

Logan watched as Roman got presumably louder as he yelled at Virgil, who in turn yelled back, but he couldn’t hear a thing. The voices were all gone, he listened to everyone underwater as his own thoughts started to drown him. Roman turned to him and started to yell as well, it looked like he expects an answer to some kind of question, too bad he didn't hear it.

‘What are they going to lose?’

They would literally lose the voice of reason, he had to stay-

Right?

Roman turned away from Logan, throwing his arms up in frustration. Patton starred worried at the unresponsive Logan, it didn't take long for his attention to be pulled back into the argument.

‘You’ll always be a part of Thomas, you don’t really have to be here,’

That was true. That was extremely true. Logan himself had said that before, while he’s not an emotion he will always be working and will always be there.

So he left.

Logan sunk out while everyone continued to argue and bicker.

You can bicker you can talk you can bicker bicker bicker, but with the subject at hand, none of the other’s knew the territory. The logical side wondered how long it would take them to notice he was gone.

As Logan rose up into his room, the first thing he did was turn off the lights. Listening to people who have no idea what their talking about and refuse to let you talk for forty-five minutes can really give you a migraine. The darkness was comforting for once; Logan had always thirsted for knowing what exactly is out there and shedding light on life, but the unknowingness of the darkness calmed him on this day. He craved to emulate that darkness one day. To become nothing, yet everything all at once.

Knock Knock Knock.

Sweet, Sweet disruptions. Surprisingly enough it didn’t take them too long.

“Logan?”

It was Patton, of course, it was Patton.

“Ya kinda ducked on us,”

‘Like I was giving much to the conversation anyway, what am I even supposed to do just stand there and be the groups Bozo Bop?'

“Are you there?”

‘No, go away’

Logan sat on the other side of the door. He was dead silent, not because he wanted to, but because he couldn’t speak. There is a limit that every person much reach. There was something he needed, a smell, a touch, a reassurance. The cold feeling of the crisp night air hitting one’s face after opening a window. The smell of the trees and the precipitation in the air as the night’s clouds soon became the morning’s dew drops. The touch of the wooden windows frames as you pushed the glass up to let the air in and out.

Logan reminded himself of these simple joys. He romanticized these moments, he lusted after the short breaks in between constantly being at work to keep Thomas happy and healthy and making sure that the other’s don’t murder each other in the process.

The current feeling hurt. Logan listened to the sounds of Patton’s footsteps only travel a small distance away before joining in on a whisper with two other voices. The room smelled musty, it gave an ancient feeling in the worst way possible. Although the room was a stark black, Logan could still tell what a mess the place was, considering that he tripped on his way over to the door.

The room was hot, it felt as if the place had no windows at all. There was no light, no air, and no pleasant smell. There was no stopping the sensory attacks space had on his migraine.

There was a sharp tug at his shirt.

The others were attempting to summon him.

This only made the Logical side laugh.

There were sixteen more tugs before they gave up, they were finishing the video without him, whether they liked it or not. The pounding continued, the steady beat of the war drums rung pain through his body.

They didn’t care.

Tomorrow he would have to get up and re-live the process.

Get up, get yelled at, work, work, work, work, work, pass out.

‘Just stop’

“What do you mean?” he asked the voices aloud.

‘Stop everything, make them beg,’

“Beg?”

‘For you to come back of course,’

This was all so confusing. He wasn’t going to become one of Deceit’s egoists just because he has a few rough days. That's all they are. Rough days. Right?

As morning came and Thomas had to start the day, Logan got to work. At his desk. The logical side would never leave his room. He owed Thomas just enough work to keep him alive, he never had to show up to the side’s meetings. They were all meaningless anyway.

Every day they pounded at his door, they would bang and scratch at all his defenses, trying everything they could to get into his room. The rhythm of their fists slowly started to match the drumming of his migraines.

Strangely enough, just like soundwaves, the pains started to pulse through Logan. Something was changing, he just couldn't tell what.

Logan would slowly sing to himself as the days drew out, it was the only song he knew.

"Daisy, Daisy,"

"Give me your answer do,"

Logan would repeat the song while he worked, ignoring how automated his voice started to sound.

"I'm half crazy, all for the love of youUu,"

His voice hissed as the vocal cords became sound bites.

"It wON'T be A sTYLISH MARRIAGE,"

Like the flip of a switch, he started to sound like that famous computer.

"I CAN'T AFFORD A CARRIAGE,"

The synthetic sound rang through the room, it was beautiful in its own way.

"BUT YOU'LL LOOK SWEET, UPON THE SEAT,"

The voice felt natural, as if this is was Logan really was. He sang to himself varying in volume as the synthetic voice shot out of him.

"OF A BICYCLE BUILT FOR TWO-,"

It took them a week before telling Thomas he could infiltrate the room with ease. Immediately the man rose up into the darkroom. There only light that pierced the room was the shine of the stars out the window and the dying bulb of the green desk lamp.

"Logan? Please tell me you're here,"

The pang of desperation that rang through Thomas's voice made the logical side vaguely guilty.

A small shuffle in the darkness and the side reveals himself through the lamplight. The audible gasp that followed only made the guilt gain specifications.

"Wh- what happened, Lo?"

The metal skeleton only avoided eye contact as Thomas drew closer.

"We're all so worried,"

' That's rich'

Logan backed away, back into the darkness. Just looking at Thomas's face hurt him.

Can I bring the other's in?"

"NO."

Thomas flinched as the rough sound of an IBM 704 echoed off the empty walls. That was the first time Logan had spoken to anyone since he first clocked out, and frankly, it terrified him.

"Logan please,"

"THEY ARE BETTER WITHOUT ME, I HAVE NO REASON TO PARTICIPATE IN THE EMOTION'S CONFLICTS," the voice wavered as he spoke, the sound bites seeming to crackle with every word.

"That's not true! Patton hasn't stopped crying since you left, Roman is blaming and destroying himself, and Virgil hasn't spoken in ages,"

"THEY DON'T CARE, THEY DON'T LISTEN TO ME, WHY DOES IT MATTER,"

Thomas grew desperate, trying to find the source of the soft computer somewhere in the darkness.

"Please let be bring them in,"

"NO."

Thomas hesitated, he wanted to respect the Logical side, but what he saw was something he couldn't just let brew. He needed to calm the logical side down.

"I can hear your singing,"

The comment surprised Logan, he slowly moved closer to the light.

"YOU CAN?"

As the metal frame poked itself into the light, Thomas knew he got him. The seemingly rusty plates did everything but shine in the light, even the dark screen that was once his face refused to reflect.

"Yes, Roman says that it actually sounded pretty nice," Thomas laughed, but it was short-lived, he couldn't hide the concern on his face for the metal man standing in front of him.

"Could you sing for me?"

The machine whirred as several fans started to go off, Thomas could only assume that meant he was embarrassed about it.

"You don't have to if you don't want to-"

It didn't take long for the logical machine in front of him to start playing notes. Thomas watched a simple roll of paper, silently go turn over and over in Logan's arm. He played a simple tone as the mechanics warmed up.

"THERE IS A FLOWER WITHIN MY HEART,"

The melody was surprisingly calming.

"DAISY, DAISY,"

Thomas listened, waving his arms behind his back to bring Patton into the room.

"PLANTED ONE DAY BY A GLANCING DART,"

Thomas held onto Patton, urging for him to be quiet.

"PLANTED BY DAISY BELL,"

Patton finally heard the voice he had been listening to from behind the door for a week now.

Logan's frame broke him, he was no longer metaphorical flesh and bone like the rest of the sides. He was open metal plating, wires fraying out here and there that were obviously self-inflicted.

"WHETHER SHE LOVES ME OR LOVES ME NOT,"

Parron followed suit, slowly bringing Virgil into the room, covering the anxious side's mouth as he came into the room.

"SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO TELL,"

Virgil almost screamed at the sight before him, that was what Logan turned into. A broken down Macintosh for a face with a salesman's IBM 704 model for a chest. A metal tube connected the chest to a pair of rusted metal prosthetic legs.

"YET I AM LONGING TO SHARE THE LOT, A BEAUTIFUL DAISY BELL,"

The synthetic notes chirped, the computer screen flashing as the sounds made Logan happy.

"DAISY, DAISY,"

The metal body swayed back and forth lovingly.

"GIVE ME YOUR ANSWER DO-"

Virgil finished the chain as he brought Roman into the room, quickly shoving a hand over the fanciful side's mouth as he attempted to scream. Roman forced Virgil's hands off his mouth.

"IM HALF CRAZY, ALL FOR THE LOVE OF YOU,"

Before Roman even got a peep out, he immediately knew what he was looking at. "Oh my god, Logan-" Roman whispered watching the computer continue to play.

"IT WON'T BE A STYLISH MARRIAGE,"

Thomas joined in on the end of the chorus.

"But you'll look sweet, upon the seat,"

"OF A BICYCLE BUILT FOR TWO,"

"Of a bicycle built for two,"

The computer sputtered and staggered back as it continued, listening as Thomas continued to harmonize with the cracking sound bites.

"We will go tandem as man and wife,"

Patton stepped forward and joined in.

"Daisy, Daisy,"

"PEDDLING OUR WAY DOWN THE ROaD OF LiFE,"

The melody started to break as Logan noticed how many people were in the room.

"I and my Daisy Bell,"

Virgil sang. Patton wasn't the only one who listened to Logan's song.

"WHeN THE ROaDS DArk wE CAN BOTH desPISE,"

Electrical cracks rang through the darkness, illuminating the room for split seconds as the machine became the man.

"policemen and lamp as well,"

Roman stepped forward. He pushed past everyone, trying to find the android in the darkness. The others quieted down, only humming the tunes as they watched the prince move forward.

"There are bright lights is a dazzling eye,"

"OF beauTIFUL Daisy Bell,"

Scrapping metal screamed through the room as the music stopped.

A sobbing voice came through the darkness.

"D-Daisy, Da-Daisy,"

Roman's strong voice called out to the logical side.

"Give me your answer do,"

An arm reached out for the creative side, he gladly grabbed onto the arm and pulled the body that belonged to it forward, pulling it into a tight embrace. Roman continued the song as he felt tears start to soak through his shirt.

"I'm half crazy, all for the love of you,"

He squeezed the logical side tightly, refusing to let him disappear into the darkness again.

"It won't be a stylish marriage,"

Logan's knees faltered, causing both sides to sink to the group as Roman refused to let go.

"I can't afford a carriage,"

The other sides rushed to make the place more comfortable, Patton turned on the lights, only to reveal the disaster that was the room. Virgil grabbed Logan's bed comforter once me managed to find it.

Logan shook in Roman's arms, his sobs wracking his whole body.

"But you'll look sweet, upon the seat,"

Patton, Virgil, and Thomas rushed over to the pair on the floor, Virgil wrapping the comforter around the group the best he could.

"Of a bicycle built for two,"

Roman finished the chorus, his grip on the Logan refusing to loosen. The group sat in near silence, the only sounds running through the room being Logan's labored breathing and Roman's sweet whispered nothings. "I'm so sorry Lo," he apologized for the 20th time.

"I didn't mean it, I didn't mean anything I said,"

Logan stifles a chuckle. "I-I," he had to take a shaky breath, he was lucky if he managed to finish his sentence. "I did- didn't even h-hear what you s-said," he looked up at creative side with a weak smile. "M-my my migraine w-was too loud," he admitted.

"Please don't do that to me ever again," tears started to form in the corners of Roman's eyes. The saltwater threatened to pour over as he repeated the words, his voice silently cracking. "I care about you Logan, I'm sorry, please don't do that again, I didn't mean it, I didn't mean it," Roman continued to mumble clinging to Logan as if he was his only life source. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm-"

The logical side cupped the creative side's face, forcing him to look at him.

"R-Roman,"

Tears started to stream down the prince's face.

"It's okay,"

"I l-love you, Logan,"

"I k-know Ro-Roman"

#sanders sides #roman sanders #logan sanders #logince #patton sanders #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #ts logan #ts roman #ts patton #ts virgil #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfiction #ts fanfic

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just-a-quirkless-loser · 4 years

Text

In A World of Grey🎶🎼

Chapter One

Grey:

Adj: A color intermediate between black and white

Adj: Pale, as through tiredness, age, or illness

‘Didn’t even notice, no punches there to roll with.’

Grey raced down the sidewalk, popping her hips to the music in her ears, grey hair swinging around her hips. She knew she should’ve left the house earlier but, the music was so distracting.

As always, Grey danced to the beat that no one else could hear. A few people sent her dirty looks but, she was too focused on the voice. Today was the day she was going to take the entrance exam for U.A., a prestigious high school for aspiring heroes. She’s dreamed of being a hero for so long and this is her chance to make this a reality. As long as she’s alive her dream of being “Musicality”, a pro hero of sound, will be achieved.

Her breath caught in her throat as she stared up at the entrance of U.A., a few happy tears pooing in her light grey eyes. Grey walked through the entrance, looking around in awe at all the students that came. Some had mutation quirks while others appeared to be normal teenagers.

‘You’ve got to keep me focused, You want it? Say so.’

‘It’s so inspirational,’ she fawns at the lyrics. While a lot of people would hate to have music constantly buzzing, it makes Grey feel happy, almost like she’s never alone. Plus, it’s good for her quirk!

“Get out of my fucking way, extra,” she was pushed to the side by a boy with blonde spiky hair. His fists were bunched at his side as he kept going, leaving the girl to wonder what his face looked like.

“Sorry for being in the way,” she smiles brightly, waving at his back. He seems to go rigid for a second before he continues on his path to the school’s front.

Time seems to blur for Grey because one moment she’s standing outside and the next she’s inside a large auditorium sitting at a desk with a pamphlet as she stared at the pro hero known as Present Mic. She wonders if she’d ever get to train with him, wondering if her quirk can be affected by pitches of voice.

‘It’s been a long time since you, fell in love.’

“...ALSO, THAT GIRL KEEPS HUMMING! IT’S DISTRACTING AND DISRESPECTFUL TO THIS HERO,” Grey came out of a small stupor to hundreds of eyes staring at her. She cocked her head to the side, a lip stuck out to form a pout.

“Sorry,” the shouting boy, she would come to know as Iida, tensed the same way the blonde did earlier. It was almost like he could feel how sorry she was and that made him feel like a monster for yelling at the sweet girl. Before he could apologize, Present Mic asked him to sit down so he could continue with the directions for the exam.

“OKAAYYY LISTENERS! DO YOU BEST,” she looks around as people start to leave the auditorium. She giggles when Present Mic seems to get louder; a fellow enthusiastic spirit was found that day.

“Little listener, what are you still sitting there for for?” Grey waited till everyone cleared out. She was reading over the exam information since she hadn’t heard any of Present Mic’s speech. “Were you the one doing the humming? Great tone by the way but wrong place, mini missy.”

“Sorry,” she’s been saying that word a lot lately; it’s becoming her favorite. “My quirk distracts me alot but, that’s okay! I can do this! Heroes always have to adapt so this must be another step for me,” she sprinted out as she was saying her impassioned blurb. “And GREAT SPEECH...well, I wouldn’t know but I bet it was good. BYYYYE.”

Present Mic watched the girl retreat, entranced by her words and adorable presence. “I’ll be watching out for that one.”

Grey manages to make her way to her designated, her peers already ready as they face in to the fake city scene the school prepared. She didn’t know if her quirk would work on the robots but, she sure as hell was going to try.

She could still feel the music flowing through her brain; the melody had repeated so many times she now had it memorized. This was her chance to prove herself. Now, she just had to find the robots.

“Helpppp,” well that was quick! She followed the wailing voice to find a short, brown-haired girl surrounded by three of the robots. It looked like the robots were closing in quick so, she had to act fast.

‘What if it doesn’t work on the robots?!?! I could get her killed and eaten...well not eaten but killed for sure. Uhhgh no no no, I can’t think this way. I’m going to help,’ Grey runs up behind one of the robots, preparing to use her quirk.

“And we can dance all day around it, if you frontin’, I’ll be bouncing,” Grey starts busting out her funky fresh moves while she sings, the lyrics pushed to the surface of the robots. The girl in trouble notices how as she dances and sings, the robots try to copy her moves, only for them to topple over as she continues to dance and sing, having too much fun to notice how it affects the other robots.

“If you want it, scream it. Shout it, babe. Before I leave you dryyy,” Grey bops to her sound, her round hips swaying in circles, her arms in the air as she gyrates to a rhythm unknown to them all. Consequently, the girl gnaws the attention of some robots (a couple which were almost destroyed by her peers before she caught their attention), the robots trying to copy her but short-circuiting from the high energy that radiated from her, leaving the teachers that were watching the exam baffled.

Grey continues her escapade of dancing, not even noticing as the same girl she saved earlier was being saved by a green-haired boy with cute freckles that almost destroyed his entire body.

The boy smashed the top of the robot, leaving it to topple forward, moments away from crushing both of the students.

“Day to night to morning, keep with me in the moment. I’d let you had I known it, why don’t you say so?” the robot freezes midfall, stuck in that position. Why? How? Well, it was all because of Grey shimmying her way up the robots back, eyes closed as she still was unaware of the sheer pressure she gave off. Her eyes were closed and her tongue was lolled out the side of her mouth as she smiled.

“Didn’t even notice, no punches there to roll with. You got to keep me focused, you want me? Say so,” by now? She was on its head, doing an 80’s American disco move as she stomped on its head to the beat of the song. She was stomping so hard, a hole caved in from her foot, the robot falling to its side.

Grey stumbled as the robot fell to the ground, not really knowing what had happened. All she knew was that everyone was staring at her and a robot was shaking its metaphorical ass behind her.

“Hehe, uhh, sorry?”

Meanwhile, the teachers didn’t know what to say. Grey literally danced all over the robot’s ass while still keeping an aura of goofiness. What in the fuck? Why in the fuck did they just witness?

“Mini Missy, definitely didn’t expect that.”

***

‘I know I fucked up, I’m just a loser.’

Grey was antsy for the arrival of the acceptance letter from U.A. It seemed like she already knew she would attend the school yet, she didn’t stop worrying over the facts.

Her eyes strained up to the ceiling, staring at nothing in particular, just listening to the music. She mumbled the lyrics out loud for the universe to hear. It was a song she created herself.

At first, Grey was hesitant to make her own music, scared that she could hurt someone. But, she figured she may as well if she even considered going to the school of her dreams. The song was upbeat yet, the lyrics echoed her somber thoughts.

Yes, she was lonely. Her father had jumped at the opportunity to ship her off to Japan once she told him that she wanted to attend the same high school that Present Mic taught at. She needed help controlling her quirk and he was the only option other than her father that she could think of to help her.

Her relationship with her father had been strained for a long time, both of them never acknowledging what had happened. He tried to be there for her but, the combined tasks of being a hero and dealing with his own emotional baggage proved to be too strenuous for the man.

For the most part, Grey was content with living by herself. She wasn’t happy (then again, she hadn’t really been happy for a long time) but, she wasn’t upset. Although, being alone took a toll on her she often forgot to eat when she got too wrapped up in the music. Sometimes, the music wasn’t pleasant, inducing nightmares that kept her in a coma-like state for hours. She’d scream at what the sounds suggested, trapped in her mind. Blood would pool in her mouth. So, yeah, it would be nice to have someone around to care for her when that happened.

‘Shouldn’t be with ya, guess I’m a quitter.’

This was one of those times. As much as she loved the music, she couldn’t deny the price it took from her. Immobilized by something she couldn’t see, forced to feel what the music chose for her to hear.

As for friends, Grey didn’t have any.

As for family, Grey didn’t have any.

As for emotional support, Grey didn’t have any.

All she had was herself and she had learned to be happy with that; she learned it’s easier to accept the facts rather than deny them.

Eventually, the music dulled from a lion’s roar to a kitten’s mewl but, Grey didn’t move. Her own blood was choking her yet, it felt like a normal suffocating feeling. It seemed into her clothes m, sticking to her skin and assaulting her senses with a copper smell.

‘Now I’m in the bathroom crying, think I’m slowly sinking.’

KNOCK KNOCK

Grey got up to answer her front door and came face to face with the mailman. She probably should’ve tried to clean the blood from her face though.

“M-Ma’am, are you okay? Where are you bleeding from? Do you need an ambulance?” the mailman reached out to touch her. It felt good to be touched.

“Ohhhh, this looks worse than what it is,” she giggled. “I’m actually great. My quirk kinda does this from time to time! I still gotta control it. Sorry for scaring you,” she scratches the back of her neck, sheepishly grinning.

The mailman tensed as many people do when they encounter her, not really knowing what to do as the girl dazzled him. He kinda just pushed the envelope into her hands and dashed to the elevator with a red face.

‘Maybe he’s constipated,’ she thought as she closed the door.

This was it; the moment she finds out if she’s going to get the help she needs to be the hero she’s dreamt of.

“MINIIII MISSSSY, IT’S ME, PRESENT MIC. IM JUST GONNA SAY, you’ve got some moves and that voice,” hologram Mic does a chef kiss and gives her a Cheshire grin. “MUAHHH, DELICIOSO. THERE’S NO QUESTION YOU’RE DEFINITELY ACCEPTED. Between the rescue and attack points, you’ve scored 98 points!!! Some of them weren’t counted, seeing as you stole some points from others but, STILL THATS A LOT. I LOOK FORWARD TO MEETING YOU. PEACE OUT, MINI MISSY,” she blinked.

“Huuhahwhuahh,” Grey kept staring at the hologram, still not believing what he said.

Seeing as Grey couldn’t even remember what happened during the exam, she didn’t think she did good. Apparently, music once again comes to her aid.

She decides to call her dad, hoping that he’ll answer for once. The first call, he doesn’t answer; he never answers the first time. The second call, he doesn’t answer; she expects that. But, the third call, he actually picks up.

“Hello, Grey. Is something wrong?” Her mouth dries. Hearing his voice makes her throat scrunch, her tear ducts getting ready for the flood. “Grey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Nothing at all. I just wanted to tell you I got accepted to U.A.,” she fiddles with the carpet at her feet. “I got 98 points on the exam too although, I did kinda daze out so I don’t remember much.”

“That’s good but, you need to stop blanking out. You need to be more considerate of the safety of other,” what about her? “Hopefully, you can get control of it. Listen, I have to go. I have a mission so, I won’t be answering my phone for a while.”

“WAIT...how is she?”

“She’s fine,” he hangs up.

She stared at the floor, music coming back. The phone’s still in her hand as she drops her arms to her side. She just stands there.

‘While you’re out there drinking, I’m just here thinking, bout where we shoulda been. I’ve been lonely.’

***

‘Snogglefuck, music always has to make me late,’ Grey was running down the sidewalk to U.A., dodging the reporters that stood at the entrance. It’s bad enough she can’t stay in to dance so there’s no way she wants to deal with those paid vultures.

‘Don’t we look good together, there’s a reason why they watch us all night long.’

‘Well, there shouldn’t be any harm in a little bit of music,’ she thinks as she shuffled side to side. Oh, poor adorable dancing bean.

She kinda loses track of time, somewhat aware of the world around her but still, shaking her body. She’s bumbled into a few people that give her a few dirty looks (in their defense, she is dancing with no music or humming) but, that doesn’t deter her from walking into Class 1-B, mistaking it for 1-A.

“Missy, wrong class,” Vlad tries to tell her but, she really isn’t listening. “Aizawa’s gonna have his work cut out with this one,” he corrects his mistake by gently grabbing her and placing her at 1-A’s door. He goes to walk off but sees she’s once again dancing towards his class.

“Aizawa, she’s dancing and she keeps trying to follow me back to my class,” Vlad’s tone may be gruff but, he’s amused. He has to nudge her into her assigned class, all while observing that her dancing is increasing in energy. In all his career, he’s never wanted to dance as much as he did then. “Get your little idol.”

“I APOLOGIZE FOR MY CLASSMATE’S MISTAKE. WE HAVEN’T SEEN OUR SENSEI YET. PLEASE EXCUSE HER,” the same boy that reprimanded her at the entrance exams is bowing before the two of them. Vlad just grunts, sporting Aizawa’s sleeping bag underneath his desk but chose not to mention it.

“Just keep her on track,” he turns and ruffles her hair which pulls her out of her trance. “Don’t go dancing off alone before we have to call a search party.”

Grey blushes once she understands that music once again blurred her. But, you can’t really blame her. It’s so catchy!

“Gahhh sorry,” she bows to Vlad and Iida. “The music is awesome though. I’m sure you’d throw it back to the song if you could hear it. Then again, it’s in my head so it’s not like you can unless I made it but, still it’s good. You know I-I’m just gonna go find my seat,” she scurries off.

“What’s your name,” Iida asks. Vlad left him in charge of watching her for the time being and he intends to watch like a hawk.

“Keenum Grey, yeah I see the look on your face. I’m American,” she twirls, not really for Iida but to the beat again. She’s trying to fight the urge.

“YOU OVER THERE WITH YOUR FEET ON THE DESK, REMOVE THEM,” and Iida’s back to yelling. She notes that his yelling isn’t really to be rude so, she’s knows it isn’t bad. “And Keenum-san, I apologize for yelling at you. I didn’t stop to think the humming was for your quirk. It was amazing how you fought those robots and I have noted you to be a worthy rival.”

“Huah? Rival? I didn’t even do anything,” she pouts and stalks over to her desk, slamming her head into it which effectively drives away the music.

‘Why is a saggy banana on the floor?’ she thinks of getting up to kick it. ‘Noooo, don’t do it. What if it moves? I’m not prepared for that possibility. But, I’m curious...I’m gonna do it.’

“Cutie?!” a hand waves around her face to catch her attention. “Are you ignoring me? Aw c’mon, I haven’t even done anything...yet!”

Grey turns to looks at a boy with honey blonde yellow hair, a fringe in the front with a lightning bolt design. His yellow eyes dance with mischief and it makes the music loud once again.

“Oh! No, sorry! I daze out sometimes but hai,” she waves as she sticks her tongue out for her signature greeting (she knows it’s not proper but since she literally shakes her ass every ten minutes, she might as well do what she wants). “I’m Keenum Grey. I look forward to being friends.”

“Kaminari Denki. Oh my god, you really are cute. You have a music quirk, right? Wanna be my songbird?” she bursts out laughing, making a few people around the two laugh as well. “Woooah, you can control emotions too.”

“Kaminari, you’re hogging her,” a boy with three purple balls for hair pops up on her side. He’s playing with a piece of her hair.

“You must like Dutch braids?...Aren’t they just dutchtecular?” Grey says it with such a straight face that Kaminari tries so hard not too snort. “C’mon, you like em. You wanna dutch with the dutch! Kaminari, you know you wanna laugh at the pun. Succumb to the laughter,” she waggles her brows.

“That’s not the only thing I like,” Mineta’s Hans grazed Grey’s exposes thigh.

“Did-DID YOU JUST TOUCH MY aSsEtS?” Grey gasps. Kaminari sounding like a dying whale beside her. Mineta eases away when Iida comes up to her desk, eyes narrowing in on the boy who tried to touch the innocent girl.

“Are you okay?” He asks her to which she nods. “Good, YOU CAN’T TOUCH WOMEN LIKE THAT.”

“I could’ve handled him. I was gonna yeet him out the window,” a determined look crossed her face as she smashed a fist to her hand. Iida gives her an exasperated look. “Hey, it’s yeet or be yeeted in this world. And, he was empty.”

At this point, Kaminari and another boy with black hair and unique elbows were cracking up. Hell, most people in the class had found the girl entertaining. The class had been somewhat quiet (other than Iida’s yelling or Bakugou’s yelling) before she showed up.

‘When I walk in with you, I watch the whole room change. Shut the shit down on sight, that’s right. We out here dripping in finesse.’

Grey hit her head down on the desk to drive the music away.

“Hey, hey, don’t do that. It’s dangerous,” the black haired boy told her. “Also, I’m Hanta Sero. Nice to meet you.” Grey decided that she liked his smile.

“Keenum Grey! And, sorry, I kinda gotta do it or the whole class may be dancing if I don’t,” that got the attention of the two you were sitting beside.

“I ain’t dancing to shit,” the blonde with spiky hair said. Grey can finally see his face m (there’s no way she could forget hair like that). His carmine eyes make his face seem even harsher but, they don’t hold the same malice as his voice would suggest.

“That’s what she said,” Grey high-fives Kaminari. “But, who are you? I bumped into you at the entrance exam.”

“Bakugou Katsuki; not that it should matter to you, shitty girl. I’m going to be the best,” she nods her head.

“You must be really strong. I hope you’re able to be the best,” the people in the room go steel. She’s so heartfelt and wholesome that they all want to give her head pats. Hell, even Bakugou can tell she’s being sincere.

“Tch, whatever, shitty girl,” he turns to look out the window to hide his soft eyes.

“That was manly,” the redhead behind Bakugou says. His teeth are sharp and remind her of shark teeth, making her want to touch them to see if they’d hurt her. He had red eyes too but his are a bit happier than Bakugou’s.

‘Why is everyone so good looking? And fit? It’s like being surrounded by webtoons!’ Grey thinks to herself. She’s fits as well but she’s always had a thicker frame with wide hips, making her an hourglass shape.

“...WHY THE FUCK IS HE HERE,” and she oops. She hears Bakugou yelling at a greenette that walked through the door. This is when the banana starts to move, drawing a scream from Grey.

“IT’S MOVING!!! SOMEONE PEEL IT, PLEEEEASE. IT’S GONNA...ohh wait, it’s a sleeping bag. False alarm,” Aizawa facepalms. This girl reminds his mmm of Yamada.

“EVERYONE. IN YOUR SEATS,” he proceeds to tell them not to only focus on making friends and that’s he’s going to test them. Grey, however, it too busy chilling with finesse in her brain.

“Whoever comes last, gets expelled,” gasps ring around her and she nods. Now is the time to prove herself. She’ll show everyone she’s a force to look out for. Now, she just has to ignore the jamfest in her heart.

—————————————————————————-

I’m really excited for this new series😁

Chapter Soundtrack: Say So by Doja Cat, SupaLonely by Benee, Finesse by Bruno Mars ft. Cardi B

@sinclairsamess @sakurashortstack

#anime #bnha #fanfic #mha #mha fanfiction #ao3 #bnha fanfiction #sero hanta #sero x oc #bnha oc #bnha kaminari #kaminari x oc #present mic #dadzawa #dadzashi #cute #bnha eijiro kirishima #kirishima x oc #overpowered oc

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whatsseobb · 4 years

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More Than Meets The Eye (Crystal x Gigi Fanfic) - Chapter 3

AO3 Link

[A/N: Hello! I’m sorry this took over a week to be updated. Real life is just getting too much for me but I’m trying my best to write. However, please expect for slow updates. I’m sorry. Thank you for waiting. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

I hope you enjoy this fic and leave me your thoughts!!]

Synopsis:

Too bad that you couldn’t see

See the girl Crystal could be

There is more that meets the eye

I see the soul that is inside~

Based from Avril Lavigne’s Sk8ter Boi but with different twists.

Chapter Three - Under the Moonlight

Two vehicles parked along the edge on the hilltop, the overlooking view of the city below them painted their scenery. The lights from below lighted the small cliff, enabling them to have a little source of brightness under than the luminescence brought by the moonlight.

The two groups merged once more as Heidi blasted the music coming from the car’s radio louder for them to all hear. They all gathered by the pick-up truck, getting their red cups once again and cheering.

They were all partying by the back of the car when they realized one person was left inside the car, silently staring at her phone. Jackie went in and talked to Daegen silently which the others tried not to listen to.

It didn’t take a while before the pink-haired girl joined them, bumped her cup and downed her drink before screaming by the cliff, “Fuck all guys! They are all pieces of worthless shit!” She yelled at the top of her lungs which gained a few giggles from the girls before they all said “Yeah!” in agreement to her.

“You know, I don’t think I’m gonna be dating anyone in a long time. I’m going to focus on myself, love myself and all that.” Daegen said in a tone that seems to be trying to convince herself rather than being extremely sure about it.

“What happened back there anyway?” Jan asked as if reading the minds of the whole bunch. True, they were clueless to what took place and they all had no courage to ask during the car ride to the cliff.

Lux was the first to explain, assuming what she might have seen that moment from the party. “Well, Noah suddenly appeared in the party… and was dancing with another girl.” She looked at Daegen to confirm her statement which the pink-haired girl continued.

“Yeah, he told me he was going to rest for the night because he fried his brains out from the exams but…” She shrugged before taking another sip of her drink. “I saw him dancing with this girl from our PE class. She’s not even good at sports. What’s to like about her?”

Widow cleared her throat before she stood up in the middle of the two cars, bopping to the beat that was being played from the radio. “Forget about boys. Speaking of dancing, you should all join me here and dance along.”

Soon after, half of the group joined Widow while the rest stayed at the back of the car, watching their friends. Gigi was sitting at the edge of the truck, letting her feet dangle as she looked at the overlooking view in front of them. Crystal went to sit beside her, joining in her silence. She dug her hand inside her pocket and picked up another cigarette, lighting it up and taking a puff. The blonde just looked at her, tilting her head to the side as she observed the teenager.

Gigi was trying to pinpoint where she might have met her before. The sapphire waves coming down from her head, the silver nose ring, the black and silver earrings on her earlobes, the black blouse topped with a denim jacket, a short black skirt over a stripped black and white tights. They all looked like she have seen it before. The girl beside her looked like trouble, with her blue-hair being the accent against her black and white outfit. She appeared to be like someone Gigi would choose last when asked to pick partners in their PE classes but here she was sitting beside her by the cliff.

“What? Do you want some?” Crystal offered, handing her the roll of cigarette in her fingers. Gigi refused politely, offering her a small smile.

“I don’t smoke. Isn’t that bad for you? Plus you’re also drinking.”

“Well, Ms. Goode, thanks for your concern but I’ll be fine.”

“How did you know me? Do we have classes together?” The blonde tilted her head to the side as she glanced at the person beside her.

“The question is do I attend classes? Haha kidding. I think we used to have History back in second year. Now I’m not entirely sure. Maybe English or Literature?”

“Mhm.” The blonde hummed under her breath, playing with her cup that was placed on her lap. “Since when did you start smoking? Do you always have that with you? Is it like a thing for someone like you?

“What do you mean someone like me? Am I like an alien or something?” Crystal darted her eyes towards the blonde beside her, watching her laugh at her question. “What’s funny about it?”

“No no, I mean, like you. Uhm, people who skates and likes metal rock stuff.” The ballerina was fiddling with her cup, staring at the clear content inside it. She watched the ripples as it bounced against the wall of the container.

“Metal rock stuff? Me? It’s not a match. Wait, do you mean because I dress up like this I like dark stuff already? I mean it’s not offensive but woah with the stereotype.” The sapphire-haired girl placed her hand on her chest, her lips turning into an O-shape as she imitate a hurt gasp, making the girl beside her chuckle lightly.

“Oh my, I’m sorry. It’s just th-“

“Yeah, I know I look like someone who likes those kinds of stuff just because of the way I dress and what I do with my skateboard, but believe me, I’m not. Not that they are not good choices of music tho, it’s just not my style.” Gigi looked down again at her cup, frowning. “Hey, it’s fine. I’m not mad.”

“But I’m really sorry for assuming things. I-“

“I said it’s fine. Come on, chill.” Crystal nudged the girl beside her with her elbow. She took another inhale of her joint before she puffed it out. The other girl just glanced at her with a faint smile on her face before looking at the view in front of them once more. She adjusted her pink jacket wrapping around her shoulders, pulling it tighter closer to her body to feel warmth. Crystal couldn’t help but notice the shifting beside her. She scooted closer towards the blonde. “I have an extra jacket in the truck. Do you want me to get it for you?”

“Oh no need. You can use it later cause I think it’s gonna get colder soon.” The blonde responded as she swing her legs while looking at the horizon. The blue-haired girl jump down from the back of the truck and jogged to get her coat. As Crystal returned back to Gigi’s side, she put it over her shoulder and let her hands rest on them firmly but not too tight.

“I’ll get it from you later when I need it. You can use it for now.”

Meanwhile, in the makeshift dance floor, the bunch of girls were enjoying the time of their lives. They all cheered, dancing along to the songs in synchrony as if they were all part of a dance group. It was a Britney Spears song that everyone was familiar with. Their giggles and singing echoed the area as they had their little party.

Jan and Jackie paired with each other as they danced to the song. They grooved and swayed their hips to the song as they had a little chat over the loud music.

“You are good at dancing, Jan.” Jackie commented, watching as the other girl in front of her bopped to the beat of the song from the radio.

“Well, of course. I am part of the dance group, remember?” The short blonde took a swig of her drink which caused her to cough a bit as she felt the alcohol run through her throat. “Woah. This is strong. But anyway, you are not bad yourself. You have some good dance moves. You should join us, maybe. So we could get to hang out more!” Jackie shook her head at the suggestion as she took her hand and twirled her around, which made the two laugh.

“I don’t want to embarrass myself any further. Plus, I have the school magazine to focus on to. I like peaceful spaces more.”

“But it’ll be fun. Come on, I can teach you our dance routines some time.” Jan offered as she continued her mini dance.

“No, but thanks, really. I just like dancing here with all of you. Plus dance while drunk is much more fun.”

“Should I always give you drinks just to let loose? I think that would be really bad for you, we both know that.” Jackie took her hand again and spun her around.

“Oh no, I’m sorry.” A light-headed Jan accidentally stepped on the Persian girl’s foot, making her slightly wince in pain. She bent her knee and reached for her foot which Jan held as well, trying to caress it. “I’m really sorry, Ja-“

“Jackie, my name’s Jackie.” The brunette offered her a kind smile as they both tried to sooth the pain on her foot.

“Wait, let me get something cold. Just stay there.” Jan looked around as she tried to locate the pick-up truck with her blurry vision, which was behind Jackie. She hurried towards the car only to bump against Jackie once again. “Oops, I did it again.”

That made the brunette roll her eyes with the joke she tried to share, letting out soft chuckles. “I think it would be best if I go with you. Who knows how many feet you’re going to bump with and step on your way to the car.”

“Hi Lux. Are you having fun?” Jan noticed Gigi approaching them who was gently swaying her hips as she danced along the music. She met eyes with Jackie who shook her head at the statement of the tipsy girl.

“She surely is drunk. It was Gigi, Jan.” Jackie led the way towards Widow’s car, settling Jan inside before she went to get a cold drink for her feet.

Gigi found Widow and Heidi on their makeshift dance floor as she felt the alcohol kicking in to her system. It helped her loosen up, allowing her to enjoy the music and bop along with her friends even with the company of people she just met. She lifted her arms into the air, feeling the melody flowing through her veins.

Back at the truck, Daya was hanging out with Crystal, the two of them standing and leaning at the roof of the car, watching their friends in their dancefloor. They silently stood by each other, passing the cigarette as they let the other enjoy the winter breeze paired with their joint.

“That Gigi doesn’t seem to be that quiet, hm?” Crystal broke the silence, turning to Daya as she pass the cig to her.

“Is she not? Oh yeah, I saw you two talking earlier. In all fairness, you made her laugh. I thought she’ll be a tough cookie to break even though she seem really soft.” The taller girl commented as she poured some drink onto Crystal’s cup. Daya then followed where the other was looking at before laying her eyes on the girl beside her, letting out a soft sigh.

“She’s quite something…” The smaller one trailed off as she locked her eyes on the ballerina, watching her dance with the bunch of girls. Her hair was flawlessly bouncing against her shoulders as she jumped around to the beat, her giggles echoing onto their small spot by the cliff. Crystal noticed the moonlight reflecting on her as if her skin was glistening under the moon’s touch.

Present Day, 2020.

The group were all at their large table by the stage, waiting for the program to officially start. They knew they had come earlier than the time but they did that as to have a longer time to be with their girlfriends as well as to update each other with their current lives. It had been some years since they all came together in one place. They were always incomplete for the past years that they had gathered. Sometimes it would be Lux, Daegen, Daya, and Crystal when they all went to visit Crystal and Lux in California. Sometimes it would be Daegen, Jackie, Jan, and Gigi in the East Coast to watch a musical. There was also a year when they almost were complete. It was during a tour Gigi and her dance company did back in their hometown. Everyone was available that weekend except for Crystal who was having her hell week for her finals in her art degree.

That reunion party was the first time after years that they were complete. Surely, they missed each other. They were all in relief as they all didn’t lose touch of each other especially with the growth of social media back in their college days which made it easier for the group to keep in touch. It also made them be as close as they used to be back in high school. It was as if they were never apart. At least for most of them.

“I’ll be right back. The band is calling me, I think there’s something wrong with the instruments. Later.” The dark-haired vocalist bid a short goodbye to her girlfriends as she walked back to the side of the stage and approaching her bandmates.

“So Lux, how has it been with you? I heard you started your own small boutique. When we go to San Francisco maybe we can all visit your store.” Jan mentioned as she picked up a piece of nacho chip and shoved it in her mouth, turning to look at the small blonde girl across the table.

“Business is going great, really. Lately, people have been fond of the vintage dresses that I make. They were asking if I also do customized pieces.”

“Do you also do wedding dress, Lux?” Heidi asked from one side of the table, smiling from ear to ear as she shifted her eyes around the table. Eyes darted back on her in confusion. “What? I’m just asking.”

“Is it for a movie? Wow, I thought you have a lot of costume designers already. That would be a pleasure to work in your movie tho. But I don’t make wedding dresses. I can give you some of my friends’ number from college.” Lux took her phone from her small purple bag as she looked for her friends’ contact information.

“Something is fishy here…” Widow shot a look towards the actress as she playfully looked around while whistling. “Hey, don’t tell us…”

Heidi then showed a flashing diamond ring that she wore on her left hand which surprised the whole table. It earned loud squeals and cheers from her girlfriends as they ran towards her. “Oh my gosh, Di, I didn’t know you are getting married!”

“We are so happy for you!”

“Congratulations!” A few of the people around their table looked at their direction since their noise were getting louder but the group didn’t mind. They are used to all the stares they get when they are all having fun.

“Wait, does the media know already? I’m pretty sure I follow all news about you. How come this didn’t come out yet?” Daegen said as she wrapped her arms around Heidi excitedly.

“Well well well, I made sure you all are the first ones to know. He proposed just this last week for our 11th anniversary. Can you believe it? I’m getting hitched!”

“Oh gosh, finally. It’s about time, don’t you think?” The group chuckled at Widow’s statement.

Out of nowhere, Jan burst into fits of laughter, covering her mouth as she tried to silenced herself but to no avail. The whole table looked at her in confusion as she continued laughing on her own. “Wait wait, hahahaha. I’m sorry. I just… hahahaha…remembered something.”

“It better be worth the laugh or you have to find your new table, Janette.” Daegen threw a table napkin towards her direction but it landed on Widow’s plate. This made the blonde laugh some more. Jackie had to offer her a glass of water to help her calm down.

“Okay, so here it goes. I suddenly remembered this thing back in high school. I am not sure if we were friends already but it did happen during dance rehearsals and the table napkin is so funny as if it read my mind because it was a story about Widow.” The taller girl shot daggers through her eyes towards Jan’s direction, murmuring “don’t you dare.”

“I love you, Widow.” Jan mouthed back before continuing with her story. “Alright, so dance rehearsals. We were all there, of course practicing and then suddenly, we heard a very loud ‘WHERE IS MY GODDAMN PHONE’ from the front of the stage. We were about to have a run-through of our routine but her phone was “missing”.” She did some air quotes with her fingers.

Gigi, who was on her phone, started giggling as well as she remembered the story Jan was referring to. “Widow just got mad at us and we have no idea why because we were all on our own groups stretching and warming up for the rehearsals.”

“Then Widow said, ‘I swear, if you all don’t bring out my phone right now, y’all have to stay here and do ten extra laps around the auditorium. ‘ We all looked at each other, then Heidi started laughing. I swear I thought my cheeks were burning that time because I was so scared for her.” Jan reached out her hand and placed it above Heidi’s who gently caressed it back. “We were all trying to stop Heidi from laughing until she pointed to the metal box Widow was holding back then. I swear she was so scary but it was so funny watching her get mad at us for that.”

The whole table started to burst into loud cackles as they listened to what Jan shared to them. They didn’t even notice Gigi excusing herself as she half-ran towards the exit with her phone in her hand, hurrying towards a much quieter place.

She reached the outside of the building, standing beside a small tree as she answered the call from someone. She talked for a few minutes before she turned back aiming for the door until a figure at the corner of her eyes caught her attention. She was wearing sparkly silver jacket and some tight leather pants, paired with black boots which was hard to miss. In the middle of her finger was a thin stick of cigarette, its smoke fuming into the air. Gigi was supposed to ignore it and go back to her friends when she heard, “Hey.”

She was stopped on her tracks, her mind wandering aimlessly as she looked down at her phone. She inhaled a deep breath, fixing the strands of hair falling onto her face, before glancing to the direction of the voice. “Oh hi.”

“I just came out to get some fresh air. Are they all having fun inside? Uhm, do you want some?” Crystal offered her a stick which Gigi politely refused.

“You know I don’t smoke.” Gigi glided towards where Crystal was, leaning her side against a column.

“Oh yeah, Ms. Goode. I remember that.” The smaller girl exhaled a chuckle as she shook her head before taking a puff of her stick.

“I thought you stopped.” It came out more like a statement rather than question as Gigi focused her eyes on her shoe, her right foot rocking back and forth as she waited for a reply.

“There are just some things that are harder to quit.”

Silence enveloped the atmosphere as they both slowly realize what Crystal’s words meant. It had been a really long time, years even, since they have been left alone with just each other’s company. The first time they met were similar to their situation now, awkward, back in the first party they attended together but things quickly changed between the two. They grew close together, comfortable with each other’s’ presence. They were friends, to say the least, always looking out for each other, searching for one another when times of need. However, they seemed to be back to square one.

They both were caught off guard when they heard some footsteps towards their spot. Crystal then felt a pair of long arms hovering over her shoulder, wrapping her into a back hug. “There you are. I’ve been looking all over for you. We’re about to start performing again. You should go back inside,” said the person behind her.

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rhiminee · 4 years

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Therapy Sessions: Track by track feels

So ok I’ve had time to listen to David’s new album *mumble hundred* times since it came out earlier this week and I think I finally am ready to share my thoughts and feelings as I listen to each song. Sorry this took a few days. I’ve had some personal things going on and I wanted to be in a clearer state of mind before I wrote all this down. :) Here we go!!!

Track 1 - Paralyzed

This song. This song is like a whole different side of David. I honestly don’t usually have favorites of any album but this song is such a favorite of mine. I almost don’t think it’s fair because this is the only song off the album that I’ve seen him perform in concert and that’s a huge factor for me. He SLAYS this live. It’s been out since last August and it’s so next level. It’s almost like it comes from another universe??? Not that there’s a single thing wrong with the rest of the album it’s just that this song is WOW. Its like its own entity. It’s a banger and an anthem and I could listen to it 24/7. David wails on it and you feel every second with a sense of urgency. Honestly one of my favorite things he’s ever done. Wait. Change that. It’s my favorite song he’s ever done. Period.

Track 2 - You Worry

This title is such a false lead! lol. I thought ok this is gonna be about trying to control your worries and how to be positive, etc. But spoiler alert: David Archuleta is a sneaky cupcake. DON’T YOU WORRY BOUT ME. icu what you did there David. This song is just such a mood. It starts off kinda slow but then it kicks up after the first verse and you know David is messing with you. It’s almost got a reggae type chill vibe to it with the ya-da-da-da-da and the melody. Or maybe that’s just me. “I’ve got my reasons why I am the way I am, so don’t you worry me”. “Living life in a bubble still comes with it’s troubles, I’ve still got a lot to learn about me but that’s ok.” This reminds me of a more mature version of Other Things In Sight from his last album. Like he was a bit bothered in OTIS but now he’s just like whatev. lol. I love it!! One of my faves from this album.

Track 3 - Ok, All Right

This is the 2nd of 3 songs on this album that we had already heard when the album was released. This song is fun and a good mantra for 2020 to try to keep ourselves sane. We need it. I like the sassiness of this and the unexpected changes in melody! David did an acoustic version of it during his launch party that I’m fully 100% in deep love with. Check it out if you get a chance.

Track 4 - Patient

Oh hi, song that I love! I don’t know why I love this so much but I would put it in my top songs on the album. Maybe it’s the stutter singing (is that what you call it??? Le-le-le-le-le-let me know) it makes my heart feel joyful. “I tell myself remember, remember to breathe, I’m trying to be patient, so won’t you please be patient, be patient with me” “Jump the gun, tend to run off at the mouth, I see that it’s in your eyes” “Find the beauty in the letting go, hurry up and learn to take it slow”. It’s almost got a bit of an R&B feel to it. Is that just me?? Maybe it’s just me. I have a pure love for this song. It just makes me so happy listening to it.

Track 5 - Need

This one of only two slower tempo songs on the album (Just Breathe is the other). David uses his lower register, especially in the first verse. Honestly when this song started I was like...is this a duet? Who is singing? Lmao. It was David. In addition to it being a lower register there’s almost a bit of a slurry quality to his pronunciation when he sings here. Or maybe it’s an overlay for the song? Idk. His voice just sounds different to me here. I’m gonna be honest and say this is my least favorite track on the album. Maybe I need to listen more. It’s not a bad song, just not my vibe and the vocals throw me off a bit. Listen and let me know what y’all think!

Track 6 - Brave

This song is such a change of pace from the previous one! It’s got an intriguing percussive cadence in the beginning, fast singing with short phrases and then bursts out into long soaring notes in the chorus, braaaaaaaaaaave!! It’s also has the honor of containing the lyric “bit me in the butt” and I laughed so hard I had had to start the song over. I really like this one!

Track 7 - Good in the Bad

THIS SONG. I wasn’t sure what to think the first time I listened. My brain was like, do I like this? Then the second time I was like, ok yeah. Then the third time and the next 500 times I was like, hi you are my true love. Seriously my level of obsession with this song now. If Paralyzed wasn’t on this album this would be my favorite song. I don’t think Paralyzed should count because yeah it’s a phenomenon and should not be compared to anything else. So. This is my favorite song on the album. I love love love love it. I can’t stop listening. “When it all goes wrong and you’re having a moment, you got to go all out, go bring back the sun out. And if it all goes wrong and you’re living in darkness, well that’s the only way the stars can shine” YES SIR “Fear is like a magnet that keeps pulling you down, so take another look because yeah it won’t take you long, give a break to your mind”. I don’t know why this song speaks so much to me but it does. Maybe because I tend to get stuck worrying about worst case and bad things that could happen and have happened. I know you can’t just ignore that stuff but idk this song just hit me different. Also the cadence and beat really drives the message. I just love everything about it.

Track 8 - Switch

Omg yep. #2 fav song after Good in the Bad. This is such an earworm! Honestly very radio friendly song. “why do i do that why do i do that” that hook. I always hit the switch and the tables start to flip, then the walls come up again, the beginning starts to end. why do i do that. Y’all. I feel that on every level. You need this song in your life. Along with Paralyzed it’s one of only two songs on this album that’s just plainly stating here’s my problem without offering a solution or “hey it’s ok we’re all like that”. I appreciate that David offers these songs too. I know and completely understand that for him music is about offering a message and hope and help to others. That’s one thing I love so much about him. But I also like that sometimes he just says here’s my issues. The humanity jumped out, that sometimes we’re just critical of ourselves without positive thoughts. Sometimes you just wanna be sad or mad at yourself. There’s time later to re-focus. It’s ok to just claim that personal honesty for a bit. If that even makes sense. But yeah. Love love this song. It’s a true jam.

Track 9 - Just Breathe

This song is like a bath in warm silk after you’ve been cold and lonely. It’s an experience. It’s like meditation in song form. Refreshing and hypnotizing. ‘I am not weak I am strong, there is still more I can offer. Someday you’ll see the better version of me. When it all stops spinning, when it all slows down. I was swimming deeper but I didn’t drown. Just breathe. So I open up to the flow and learn to love you as we go, until I don’t think I just know.’ It’s like a midsummer night’s dream in song form. <3

Track 10 - Future Self

So true and surprisingly funny! This is such a quirky song. Any song that references reddit and smash bros gets an A+ in my book lol. I was surprised because a lot of times the last track is kind of a throw way imho but this one had me smiling and bopping! It’s a love letter to finding yourself and being kind to yourself.

Final thoughts:

You guys are gonna laugh because I feel like I say this anytime a new album comes out but I honestly think this is my favorite album that David has ever done. It’s cohesive and fun to listen to and says a lot without being too heavy. It’s so awesome to see the progression in David’s music but even more so to know it’s a reflection of the progression in his life. He’s not afraid to say he’s got issues but he has been working hard on facing those and making strides. It shows in his music. I feel a sense of joy I haven’t heard before. This album is so good. The production quality, the vocals are on point, the beats are stellar. Please check it out if you haven’t already!

http://lnkfi.re/TherapySessions

#david archuleta #therapy sessions #this album is amazing #thoughts and feels #lots of words #my wrists got sore typing all this

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atinytokki · 4 years

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Here’s my first impressions (aka this is what 2020 is gonna sound like folks)

Alright so I’m really behind today, as some of you know I literally just got back from vacation and it’s also my first day of classes this semester and it’s just craziness. Yes I’m posting the first chapter of Yeosang’s spin-off today. But people seemed to like my first impressions of the last album so I’m going to do them again. Thankfully (?) this album is a lot shorter so I can pause and talk about stuff.

Warning! a loooong post, squealing, incoherent thoughts smashed together, and crying ahead. A lot of crying. Keysmashes included.

Post-MV thoughts before I listen to it again: There’s way too much to focus on and I’ve watched it many many times to look at the choreo and the storyline stuff that’s happening, but this is my first time listening without the video so I’ll notice more musically this time. But first I wanna say; YEOSANG’S LINES!!!! I’ve been screaming for forever that he has a beautiful deep voice and needs to be given parts that compliment it. And wow it finally happened :’) Anyway here we gooo

건배하자 like a thunder!! Can you believe they literally spoiled the entire hook of their next song in Beginning of the End? *flashbacks to my utter confusion when that happened* San sounds amazing and I like the little echoey thingies. Gives it a real nostalgic feel. Jongho already popping off vocally barely 10 seconds in. Mingi’s rap here and the transition to Hongjoong’s— rap line goals. The attitude in that mm-mm made me smile ngl. This prechorus might be my favourite part of the song. Seonghwa sounds heavenly. An EDM drop bringing back that hook, good decision and again it kinda feels nostalgic?? Especially the oh-oh-ohs which are also giving me a pirate drinking song vibe wow 0.0 Wooyoung with that 불러 불러 lol. Yes the Yeosang part!! I love a good post-chorus switchup and he. handled. it. perfectly. There’s even harmony, yall know how much I love harmony. And SINGING RAPPERS AHAHDJAHAK YESSSSS. Back to that glorious prechorus but it’s Yunho’s turn. This chorus is just such an anthem. I’m bopping rn. San in this bridge— he said I am a VOCALIST listen to my beautiful VOICE. Yay the rappers going back and forth again!! It’s like If Without You. Man I can’t believe I get to replay this song forever. 2020 is gonna be lit. You hit those notes Jongho! I’m always blown away by this kid, and that scoop earlier mmmm. Just nodding very energetically right now. Perfect end to the song. 100/10!!!!

Okay I’m pausing before the next one starts because no I am not prepared. It’s just like last time; I know Hongjoong wrote this and I know it’s gonna ruin me but I have no idea how and when and what it’s even gonna be like but anyway, too bad, let’s just go.

Oh kinda futuristic sounding opening with the synths? Yooo the vocal thingy in the background, sounds like a sample of some kind, that is super cool and I hope we get more of it. Ok I paused just to write that, let me unpause. This is gonna be a long one, I can already tell, sorry guys 😅 And the beat changed right before the vocalists came in. definitely a back and forth thing here in two registers, very sweet. Wow. WOW MINGI WOW. This rap is?? It sounds super mature and idk just full of confidence. I’m shook. Ok the chorus. Holy cow this is LIT lit. Nope nope I need to pause and go back. This is so chaotic, I feel like I’m missing things?? I’m listening to that chorus again because there were so many elements there. I just wanna take this song and break it down second by second to hear every single sound hahahah. I’m only catching an odd word or two here as far as lyrics go. Oml harmonies 💆🏻‍♀️ Alright Hongjoong’s rap. OMG if he sounded sassy in Answer this is a whole new level and I LOVE IT. Flow is 100/10. The “are you gonna take me there” gives me chills. This song needs a dance this chorus is TOO LIT. Am I at a rave rn??? Oh thank God the bridge took it back a level. Ok I’m pausing because I think I caught some of the lyrics this time. If I’m not wrong I heard 난 궁금해 저 끝이 궁금해, 더 가까이 조금 더 가까이 ? Which is something like “I wonder, I wonder about the end. Closer, a little bit closer” if I heard correctly. I need to look up the lyrics in full later because Hongjoong has a big brain and his lyrics are always 🤯🤩 Ok unpause. Final breakdown! Yep this is going on repeat the rest of today. Jongho yussss with the ad libs. No it’s over ㅠㅠ Alright this one is already vying for top spot this album. We shall see. But I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. HONGJOONG GENIUS.

Um so yeah I saw them perform this live for their anniversary thingy and cried so this should be fun. At least I already know the song so how much can it hurt me? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Smart of whoever put this album together to stick this song right in the middle and make us cry between head banging to the other songs. Mingi in the beginning is just 💖💕💘💝💓 San ballad king. I need more ballads from him. Jongho, of course, with perfect vocal control. Oh Seonghwa too, I need more ballads from him. Wooyoung with T H A T part. A tear is forming, I just love this chorus. People are saying the song should be in a drama and I 100% agree. Everyone together FOREVER YOU ARE MY STARRR. The little drum frills it’s so cute :(( Yay Hongjoong, and his cute little voice I’m UWUWU. Wooyoung with the high note and I’m ascending........... Chorus again and this is the real meaning of crying in the club. It just occurred to me that the second verse seemed really short. Yeosang + Hongjoong + that guitar in the bridge is *chef’s kiss*. This is so emotional, do we really need to do this at 4am?!? I’m just gonna vibe for a sec, it’s the last chorus. The ad libs were so perfect and the way it ended— wow. I need a moment.

From my understanding this is a full version of the Precious Overture they gave us last album. Tempted to go back and see my first impressions about that one, but either way i have a distinct feeling my wig is about to be snatched. Let’s GOOO

So far, it’s starting the same. Creepy humming and all. Okay scratch that, we have a vocal melody. Yunho sounds great ugh I’m so proud. Sorry, San’s voice just takes me to another plane of existence or something, how can it be that smooth and gorgeous, someone please explain. Building to something now... Oo. OO?! Hongjoong’s rapping. This is so cool oh wow, and into this vocal part which I believe is the chorus?? wOW wow it’s amazing to hear this having already heard the bgm, this is like a new level of appreciation. It really all goes well. Ah we have a switch up now with Seonghwa. guys GUYS GUYS you know how I feel about switch ups. Sorry I’m going back to catch something. The tempo changed here and really grabbed my attention. The bass is also super cool, it’s actually the same melody as the treasure opening (and the opening of this song) but much lower, I believe. Uh oh guys this might be vying for top spot too. Let’s continue. Ok Mingi’s rap which I’ve already heard. Um I’m confused now. It’s Hongjoong’s rap again? Is this the chorus?? Woah woah hold on I gotta pause. Because. Wait, what?? This is the chorus??!? Yoooooooo bold move! I have no idea what is going on but I love it. Continuing on. Ah yeah ok the vocal part with Yeosang again, so I guess the rap + vocal part is the chorus? Also I neglected to mention but Yeosang is killing this song. Ooh okay this bridge is building some suspense. Feeeelingggggg.... And now a shouted version of the rap for the final chorus. Okay wow I’m impressed that they took it this direction. And Jongho with the ad libs is PERFECTIONNNN. Oop okay they’ve added the revised-lyric Treasure part to the end here. And the lyrics are the same as in Precious (Overture) so I’m guessing we still didn’t find the treasure, good grief. How long is it gonna take to find this treasure 😅. And it ended like that. Well. WOW. Again, I could listen to this on repeat all day. Again, I am deceased. Instant fave.

I’m pretty sure this is the exact same as I already heard on the trailer thingy but we are gonna react to it anyway.

The orchestra really loosens my tear ducts like nothing else. It’s beautiful, who else is doing it like them?? “Did you find your treasure?” Yes, I found ATEEZ 🥺. The way he says “finally found it” . This is Maddox btw. Also about Maddox, hang on I’m gonna pause for a PSA: guys if you don’t know Maddox please PLEASE check him out. He’s doing the amazing narration on this (and Intro too), he’s a soloist under KQ and one of Ateez’s hyungs who they look up to. In addition to his superior narrating talents, he is also an amazing vocalist. If you like R&B and lo-fi music I would definitely recommend him, he just dropped a single called Color Blind, his insta is xxmaddox, he’s a great guy and YEAH that’s all for my plug but go stan him, he is deserving and proof of the fact that KQ artists are talent through and through. Unpausing! The way the orchestra swells and then goes into a piratey sounding theme is so motivating and familiar :))) “Can you hear those voices?” HNGJRKSNDN WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SCARY. This is the Epilogue, it’s supposed to be like the denouement, the falling action!! The bad guys should be gone now! What’s next?? Treasure Ep: Answer to Question? Because that’s what I have after this album! More questions!!! Anyway, the bass here and the humming 👌🏻 100/10 for the instrumental. And in ATEEZ fashion, they leave me thirsting for more.

So that was my first impression/live reaction to the mini album! I think it’s Horizon and Precious fighting for #1 currently. Maybe I’ll reblog with second and third and fourth impressions... Thanks for reading if you got this far! And tell me what your first impressions were and if I missed something big while I was keysmashing. TTFN~

#ateez #ateez action to answer #ateez answer #ateez reactions #ateez first impressions #first impressions #keysmash #liveblog #tokki.txt

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hey-have-you-heard · 4 years

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Hey have you heard these 50 songs from 2019

I really enjoyed this last year so going to give it another go for ‘19. I put quite a lot of thought into what actually a ‘song of the year’ for me when I was first constructing and then heavily editing the playlist that came to be my Top 50 of 2019. I think the most important thing is that above all it’s a track that I’m glad exists, sometimes this is because of the songwriting or composition, sometimes the performance, sometimes the lyrical importance and sometimes just because it sparks joy.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6bFJOjL8b8Zc2s5r1oJbsk?si=UJdqSXOTR3SQ8D3IwcmV2g

Explanations for each tracks inclusion below the fold…

100 gecs - 800db cloud 100 gecs channel a mix of Crystal Castles and Sleigh Bells with a Death Grips level appreciation for noise. It’s an absolute rush and that outro is just absurd.

Natalie Evans - Always Be Natalie Evans soft melody and sing song vocals are sublimely sweet on this heartfelt track of lost love, longing and nostalgia.

Petrol Girls - Big Mouth “If you fight back or disagree you’re the one with the fucking problem” this hits home, hard. Big Mouth is a rallying cry to speak out against oppression and discrimination, to raise you’re voice and be heard, not to be controlled.

Charli XCX ft. Lizzo - Blame it on your Love Charli has a midas touch when it comes to pop, combine that with Lizzo who has just about been the most fun thing in music this year and you’ve got a 10/10 banger.

Poppy - BLOODMONEY Poppy’s music just keeps going further down the rabbit hole. Originally playing with blending elements of nu-metal with bubblegum pop, she now seems to have transcended genre altogether to create whatever BLOODMONEY is, it’s absolutely ridiculous and I love it.

Body Hound - Bloom Get on that GROOVE! So proggy it hurts, this track from Body Hound is a technical wonderland of metamorphosing rhythms, gargantuan riffs, and just the tastiest of chord progressions.

Can the Sub_Bass speak - Algiers Word of warning, this is not an easy listen. A freefall tumble through genre and tone accompanies a stream of consciousness monologue full of racism, prejudice and political and artistic critique.

Elohim - Buckets Buckets is an onslaught of trap influences, emotional outbursts and aggressive distortion. I’m a big fan of this sound.

VUKOVI - C.L.A.U.D.I.A I know very little about VUKOVI as a band, but that riff is absolutely massive and this track has been a constant throughout my year on that basis alone.

Show Me The Body - Camp Orchestra Apparently more hardcore bands should use Banjos, because this is a damn good sound. Slowly building from a single bass line this track builds into a powerful demolishing force.

clipping. - Club Down Having thoroughly proven themselves able to do afro-futurist scifi on the Hugo nominated Splendor and Misery, clipping. now turn their considerable talents to horror core and unsurprisingly nail it. Daveed’s flows are tight as ever as he brings to life a decaying city backed by tortured screams.

Dream Nails - Corporate Realness YOU ARE NOT YOUR JOB. WORK IS NOT YOUR LIFE. YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOU MUST DO IN ORDER TO SURVIVE. Dream Nails are great and exactly what we need right now.

ControlTop - Covert Contracts This track positively bristles with an anxious energy. A fitting sound for the subject of the information overload we find ourselves locked into everyday.

Cherry Glazerr - Daddi There’s an icy coolness to ‘Daddi’, a disconnected sarcasm that falls away to reveal the anger and torment in the chorus, it’s a masterful bit of emotional storytelling through musical tone.

The Physics House Band - Death Sequence I Listening to Physics House latest release, the Death Sequence EP feels like a physical journey. This opener is a perfect example of this, as you’re plunged straight into a heady and disorienting mix of rhythms and counter-melody’s, the Sax guiding you through the turbulence until you land in a placid midsection, before that bass riff drags you forward through rhythmic breakdowns into an absolutely absurd brain melting saxophony and then it just keeps on going from there…

Witching Waves - Disintegration I saw WW back in the early summer, they were a bassist down so it was just a guitar and drums duo. They started with this track and it was one of the most pure punk things I’ve experienced, drummer/vocalist Emma Wigham bashing the absolute shit out of her kit . A great no-nonsense lo-fi banger.

Lingua Ignota - DO YOU DOUBT ME TRAITOR Another, not particularly easy listen here. DO YOU DOUBT ME TRAITOR is a dark and angry brooding track, building in intensity to release the primal rage, fear and horror of the abused. Its deeply chilling and instantly arresting. This track and the entire CALIGULA album stands as an absolute must listen.

Carly Rae Jepsen ft. Electric Guest - Feels Right I love the instrumentation on this one, those chunky piano chords and screaming guitar lift the track out and make it the highlight of an already great album to me.

Orla Gartland - Figure it out Dialing back the intensity slightly, Orla chronicles the frustrations of having to deal with someone in your life who you’re done with. The choruses burst forth in beautifully fuzzy explosions of noise. That vocal flair at the start of the final chorus is chef kiss.

Battles - Fort Greene Park Battles are at their best when they keep things simple. This is evident on 2019′s Juicy B Crypts which features some incredibly cluttered moments, but this just makes Fort Greene Park stand out all the more. A delightfully spacious piece of math rock, from some of the best in the business.

Dogleg - Fox Boy howdy, do I love me some midwest emo. Catharsis in musical form, it just makes me want to mosh my troubles away like I’m 16 again.

Tørsö - Grab A Shovel Tørsö go hard, I can appreciate that. An absolutely brutal track about the destructive power of depression and self-loathing.

“Pijn & Conjurer playing Curse These Metal Hands” - High Spirits “We were like, are we Pijn and Conjurer, or are we Curse These Metal Hands? I think we’ve settled with ‘we are Pijn and Conjurer playing Curse These Metal Hands’ …whatever that means!“ what it means is one of the most joyously triumphant pieces of metal music I’ve ever heard. Some of the guitar lines in this absolutely soar.

Lizzo - Juice Lizzo has won 2019, her message of self love, acceptance and body positivity has won her both critical and cultural acclaim and permeates her music in a way that makes it impossible to not love.

COLOSSAL SQUID, AK Patterson - Kick Punch Colossal Squid is the name given to Three Trapped Tigers drummer, Adam Betts’ experimental project. After a solo album of percussive wizardry Betts has now teamed with vocalist AK Patterson to give us something else entirely.

Evan Greer - Liberty Is A Statue Evan Greer uses the a folk punk sound to deliver an essay on the damaging influences of cis-normativity and social inequality. Of course I like this one.

Taylor Swift - Lover I wasn’t on board with this song for a fair while, but then I kept listening to it and kept coming back to it because of a roughly 50 second section which ties the track and the whole album together. Yeah, this is on here purely for the bridge, which is just beautiful.

Dodie - Monster Monster is an incredibly well written and delivered study on how perception changes with resentment and it makes me cry.

The Y Axes - Moon Moon is a delightfully dreamy piece of pop that glitters with infectious melodies, it’s lyrics a blissful embracing of cosmic nihilism, need I say more?

Ezra Furman - My Teeth Hurt My teeth hurt is a song about tooth ache, about that pain you carry with you everywhere and can’t get rid of, that ruins your days and and is one hell of a mood. Yeah it’s about gender dysphoria.

Nervus - No Nations Speaking of things being a mood, this track hits the nail squarely on the head.

Cultdreams - Not My Generation "Everyone ignores me Unless I’m on a stage talking Because they put me on a pedestal And pretend I’m just performing“ Lucinda Livingstone calls out the misogyny in our culture with a singular ferocity.

Lil Nas X - Old Town Road If there’s one song that’s dominated 2019 this is it right here. Who ever had the idea of putting that NIN Ghosts sample to a trap beat and cowboying over the top of it is an absolute genius.

King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Planet B It’s impossible to predict where King Gizzard’s sonic influences are going to take them next I doubt even they know half the time. Whatever they turn their hand to though they do it as if they mastered the sound decades ago Planet B is an all out thrash track with a strong environmental message.

Kesha - Rich, White, Straight Men Okay, I’m about to compare Kesha to John Lennon here but HEAR ME OUT… As ‘Imagine’ asked us to consider a world without conflict or capitalism, Kesha now posits that we should tear up our conceptions of our society based on its formation by a privileged group and imagine what kind of utopia could be built if we gave the underprivileged and minority groups a say.

Allie X - Rings A Bell The chorus here sounds like it could have been off Daft Punk’s Random Access Memories, and I’m all about that sound. Combined with Allie X’s dreamlike vocals make this a certified bop.

Poly-Math - Sensors in Everything Sensors in Everything is a beast of a track spanning over 14 minutes of absurdly dense prog. Having recently enlisted keyboardist Josh Gesner. Polymath make use of the new sounds and textures available to them, at times imitating a sort of Hammond sound not unlike John Lord to the chaotic maelstrom of noise.

Calva Louise - Sleeper Big hooks on this one. Sleeper has a confident swagger to it’s sound which stands apart for the bands previous work. It’s an absolutely huge track.

Slipknot - Solway Firth Slipknot didn’t disappoint after the tease of 2018′s “All Out Life”, following up with an album which blended old and new aspects of their sound to create one of their best to date. Solway Firth is a perfect example of this matching the punishing heaviness of Iowa with the melody driven sound of All Hope Is Gone.

Clt Drp - Speak To My Seeing Clt Drp perform live was one of my highlights of the year. The filthy guitar tones, powerhouse vocals tight as heck drumming and the _grooves. _Absolutely like nothing else I’ve seen. Just an incredible band that deserve so much more recognition.

Black Country, New Road - Sunglasses Black Country, New Road released two tracks this year and now I just want more. Dense wordy lyricism plays off against ever evolving instrumentation to present a raw cut of emotional storytelling.

Her Name Is Calla - Swan Her Name Is Calla are a band that have always been on the edge of my radar, my Dad is very fond of them and saw them live a couple of years ago, but never went back to relisten to any of their stuff, then they started an album with this. I was sold instantly.

black midi - Talking Heads Talking Heads (the band) are an obvious inspiration on this track. Both David Byrne’s vocal style and the Talking Heads penchant for sharp angular melodies are on show here. But given an extra ounce of chaos through Black Midi’s delivery.

Amanda Palmer - The Ride The ride is ten minutes of bundling up all your fears and anxieties of where we are and where we’re going and just, accepting them as part of the ride. Written off the back of a prompt from Amanda asking her fans what they were afraid of right now.

Kim Petras - There Will Be Blood Okay, let’s have some out of season spookiness. Love the squelchy synths on this, there’s a huge amount of energy on this track and with it’s commitment to the horror conceit it makes for a super fun bop.

Kate Nash - Trash Kate Nash’s sound is like bathing pure nostalgia,here she spins the toxic-relationship narrative central to her work to deliver a bigger story about humanity’s, quite literally toxic relationship to our planet.

American Football & Hayley Williams - Uncomfortably Numb The other side of the “midwest emo” coin. A melancholic song built on a soft bed of arpeggiated chords and clean harmonics, Uncomfortably Numb is a heartbreaking track of losing everything and of cycles persisting thorugh generations. Employing the clever metatextual trick of referencing Pink Floyd’s comfortably Numb to mirror the generational similarities.

Glenn Branca - Velvet and Pearls Disclaimer, Glenn Branca was a musical hero of mine, his approach to music and composition being solely responsible for influence a vast number of my favourite bands. Released posthumously, Velvet and Pearls is taken from a live performance by Branca’s ensemble and perfectly captures the sense of sonic disorientation, conjuring aural illusions through an assault of intricately crafted noise. It’s an exhilarating piece that should be played as loud as humanly possible.

Brutus - War The raw emotional strength of Stefanie Manneart’s vocals instantly made me pay attention when I first heard this track. Then the song exploded into a barrage of riffs and breakneck drumming.

Valiant Vermin - Warm Coke Another slice of throwback pop, Valiant Vermin proved with “Online Lover” how much of an ear she has for pop and has proven it once again with Warm Coke. Is a real good bop.

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Welp there it is, 50(+1) songs, I had to limit myself to one track per artist in the main 50 because according to Spotify I listened to [checks notes] 1082 new artists this year. There are a small handful of tracks I wanted to highlight from the same artists though as they offer something quite different to the tracks in the playlists, so here they are quickly with 3 word descriptions.

Petrol Girls - Skye (dead dog, sad) Amanda Palmer - Voicemail for Jill (Talk about abortion) Ezra Furman - I Wanna be Your Girlfriend (Trans Torch Song) Battles ft Jon Anderson & Prairie WWWW - Sugar Foot (Batshit Prog Insanity) Poppy - Choke (Dark Minimalist Pop) Show Me The Body - Forks and Knives (Anxious nightmare punk) Lingua Ignota - CALIGULA (the whole album.)

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Closing Statement

Cultdreams - Statement

There has been a shadow over the entertainment industry the latter half of this decade. Whether film, music, TV or video games, the late 2010′s are filled with stories of people coming forward to bravely tell their stories about being abused and manipulated by men in positions of power. The #metoo movement as it’s come to be known has been a powerful force in giving marginalised people a voice and the ability to call out oppressors and in starting the groundwork to root out the misogyny in the seats of power, but this is a battle far from won.

While there are thousands of stories out there I want to focus on one in particular.

In 2016 a number of women spoke out about various forms of abuse by a well-known musician in the punk scene. It’s now over three years later and this group of women are in the midst of a long fought claim of defamation from this musician. If this case goes through it sets a precedent for silencing marginalised voices in the industry. They have been fighting for so long and with no legal aid available for the case they have had to finance their defense from their own pockets.

This is where Solidarity Not Silence comes in. Solidarity not silence is a crowdfunding effort to help take the case to trial without the women bankrupting themselves entirely so that they don’t have to give in to this mans demands. You can read more about Solidarity not Silence and make a donation (if you feel so inclined) here: https://www.crowdjustice.com/case/solidaritynotsilence/

You can also follow them on twitter here https://twitter.com/solnotsilence

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