#but yeah I've been meaning to do this for a while

[elia-the-bibliophile]

The Fast Lane to Fashion (Max Verstappen x Female Reader)

Genre: Fluff Word count: 3,1k

The one where Max’s manager hired a personal stylist for him.

Max squatted on the floor, his two cats, Jimmy and Sassy, lounging nearby with the kind of indifference only felines can muster. Max, however, was determined. “Come on, Jimmy, you can do it,” he encouraged, holding out a treat like it was the Holy Grail. Jimmy blinked, his eyes half-closed, clearly contemplating more important things—like napping. Sassy, on the other hand, stretched luxuriously and let out a yawn that seemed to mock Max's efforts.

He had spent the last two hours trying to get them to high-five him, but his attempts were as futile. “This is hopeless,” Max muttered under his breath.

Just as he was about to admit defeat, his phone rang, shattering the atmosphere. He glanced at the caller ID—Raymond, his manager. With a sigh, he accepted the call and put it on speaker, still waving the treat in front of Jimmy's nose.

“Hey, Raymond, what's up?” Max greeted, his attention split between the phone and his uncooperative pets.

Raymond's voice crackled through the speaker, sounding unusually jittery. “Max, buddy, don't be mad, okay? Just hear me out first,” he began, words tumbling out like they were in a race of their own.

Max raised an eyebrow, casting a bemused glance at Jimmy, who had finally acknowledged his presence with a slow blink. “Yea, sure. What's going on?” he replied, curiosity piqued.

“I, uh, well, I've hired someone for you,” Raymond confessed, his tone hesitant.

Max blinked, momentarily forgetting about his feline training. “Hired someone? For what?” he asked, his mind racing through all the possibilities.

Raymond took a deep breath before blurting out, “A stylist, Max. I've hired a stylist for you.”

Max's eyes widened, and he nearly dropped the phone. “A stylist? You've got to be kidding me, Raymond,” he exclaimed, his voice dripping with disbelief. “Why on earth would I need a stylist?”

Raymond let out a nervous laugh. “Well, you know, Max, there have been some… memes about your fashion choices. People are starting to wonder if that Red Bull polo is surgically attached to you!”

Max scoffed loudly. “Seriously? People think I have zero fashion sense just because I like to keep things simple?” he replied, rolling his eyes.

Raymond cleared his throat, relieved that Max wasn't outright furious. “Well, yeah. Something like that,” he admitted.

“What does it matter what I wear when I'm winning races left and right?” Max protested, his incredulity evident. “I mean, come on, mate. This is ridiculous.”

Raymond tried to soothe him. “I get it, Max, I really do. But image matters, surely it wouldn't hurt to switch things up a bit, you know?”

Max sighed, running a hand through his tousled hair. “Fine, fine,” he relented begrudgingly. “But I'm not promising anything. And if this stylist suggests I wear anything other than comfortable clothes, I'm out.”

Raymond chuckled, sensing Max's reluctance but appreciating his willingness. “Fair enough, Max. Just give it a chance, okay? Who knows, maybe you'll discover a whole new side to your wardrobe.”

Max rolled his eyes, unconvinced. “Yeah, sure, Raymond. A whole new side of my wardrobe that consists of more Red Bull polos,” he quipped sarcastically.

Max sighed, turning back to his unimpressed feline companions. “Can you believe this, Jimmy? Sassy?” he addressed them as if they were humans. “A stylist. For me. It's like Raymond has lost his mind.”

Jimmy blinked lazily, utterly unconcerned, while Sassy stretched out and emitted a soft purr.

A wistful smile tugged at the corners of Max's lips. “Sometimes, you know, I wish I was just a cat like you two,” he mused aloud, watching as they continued to bask in their simple, carefree existence.

════════════════════════════════════

Y/N sat in the waiting room at the Energy Station, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her blouse, smoothing out imaginary wrinkles. She glanced around, taking in the impressive display of trophies adorning the walls—each gleaming trophy a reminder of Red Bull's dominance on the tracks. The sheer number of them made her feel like she was sitting in a shrine.

This was her first meeting with Max, and the anticipation was practically electrifying. She stole a quick glance at her reflection in a nearby mirror, adjusting her hair and smoothing down her outfit once more. It wasn't every day that she was called in to style a world-class athlete, and the pressure to make a good impression was almost suffocating.

She was acutely aware of the challenge ahead. Raymond had drilled her on the importance of not scaring Max away with any extravagant fashion suggestions. After all, Max was rarely seen in anything other than his team's merchandise, and the last thing Y/N wanted was to make him uncomfortable and lose her job on the very first day.

Y/N's heart skipped a beat as a woman in a Red Bull shirt approached her. “Ms. Y/N L/N?” the woman inquired, her voice friendly. “Mr. Verstappen is ready to see you now.”

Y/N nodded, her nerves tingling with anticipation as she quickly rose from her seat. “Thank you,” she replied, trying to keep her voice steady.

The woman offered her a reassuring smile before gesturing towards a door at the end of the hallway. “Right this way,” she said, leading Y/N with practiced ease.

As they approached the door, Y/N took a deep breath, steeling herself for the encounter that awaited her on the other side. With a final reassuring nod from the woman, Y/N squared her shoulders and stepped through the doorway.

She sent a quick prayer that Max wouldn’t be too hard on her.

════════════════════════════════════

Max drummed his fingers impatiently on the table, boredom creeping in as he contemplated making a swift exit for the seventh time in the last ten minutes. Despite his mercurial nature, he prided himself on his manners, so he resisted the urge, albeit begrudgingly.

As the door creaked open, Max glanced up with a practiced poker face, giving nothing away. His gaze met the hopeful expression of the woman entering the room, her smile wide and optimistic.

“So, Y/N L/N, who exactly hired you?” was the first thing Max inquired, his tone laced with skepticism as he leaned back in his chair.

“Well, let's just say I went through quite a long interview process," she replied, her voice tinged with amusement. “Raymond, then Horner after that, and lastly, believe it or not, even Geri had a say in it.”

Max raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. “All that just to hire a stylist for me?” he echoed, unable to hide his surprise.

Y/N nodded, chuckling softly. “They were very thorough. I guess they wanted to make sure you wouldn't bolt at the first sight of a new wardrobe.”

Max couldn't help but laugh at that. “Well, they got that right. I'm not exactly known for my adventurous fashion choices.”

“Don’t worry,” Y/N said, her tone light and reassuring. “I promise not to suggest anything outrageous. No sequins or feather boas, I swear.”

Max snorted. “Good. Because the day I wear a feather boa is the day I retire from racing.”

Y/N laughed, the tension easing a little. “Deal. Let’s start with something simple. Maybe a t-shirt that’s not branded with Red Bull? Or a straight jeans?”

Max pretended to think it over, stroking his chin. “I suppose I could handle that,” he said. “As long as it’s comfortable.”

“Comfort is key,” Y/N agreed, feeling more at ease. “We’ll keep it simple. I’m here to help, not to turn you into a fashion icon overnight.”

Max relaxed a bit, appreciating her straightforward approach. “Alright, let’s see what you’ve got. But remember, if I don’t like it, it’s back to polos and hoodies.”

“Fair enough,” Y/N said, her smile brightening. “I’ll take my chances.”

Max then stood up and walked over to her, extending his hand with a cocky grin. “Max Verstappen,” he said, his tone playful but confident. “If you manage to impress me, then maybe, just maybe, I'll consider keeping you on the team.”

Y/N shook his hand, matching his grin. “Challenge accepted. But I should warn you, I don’t do half-measures.”

Max raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “Oh, really? Well, let’s see if you can handle the challenge. I’m not exactly easy to impress.”

Y/N chuckled. “I’ve heard. But I’m not exactly easy to scare off, either.”

Max laughed, a genuine, hearty sound that filled the room.

Y/N playfully raised an eyebrow. “Honestly, I think this will be my easiest gig yet, considering the bar is practically on the floor,” she said, her tone teasing.

Max's eyes widened in surprise before he hunched forward, laughter bursting out of him. “Oh, you’ve got no filter, do you?” he said between laughs. “I fucking like that.”

She shrugged. “Just calling it like I see it.”

Max straightened up, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. “You know what? If this fails, screw it, I’ll just sign you on as my personal entertainer or something. Keep the team’s spirits up.”

Y/N chuckled. “Careful, Max. I might just take you up on that.”

He crossed his arms, his grin not fading. “Hey, a good laugh is priceless in this sport. But don’t think I’m letting you off the hook that easily. Because I’ve got high standards, you know. World champion standards.”

Y/N laughed. “I’d expect nothing less. But don’t worry, I’ve styled worse. Much worse.”

Max's eyes sparkled. “Worse than me? Now that’s something I’ve got to hear.”

════════════════════════════════════

Y/N balanced a stack of freshly laundered clothes in her arms as she approached Max's apartment. She took a deep breath, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. Knocking on the door, she prepared herself. The door swung open to reveal Max, looking casual in yet another Red Bull polo.

“Hey, Y/N. Come on in,” he greeted with a nod while holding the door for her.

“Thanks, Max,” she replied, stepping inside and carefully setting the clothes down on a nearby table.

Before she could even turn around, she felt a light brush against her leg. Glancing down, she saw Jimmy rubbing against her with a purr, while Sassy sat nearby, her wide eyes fixed on Y/N with an unusual interest.

Max’s jaw dropped. “What the hell? They usually hate strangers. They’re acting like you’re made of catnip or something.”

Y/N laughed, bending down to scratch Jimmy behind the ears. “I have a way with cats. Maybe they can sense I’m here to help you.”

Max shook his head, still looking baffled. “Unbelievable. They’ve never been this friendly with anyone. Alright, come on, let me show you the infamous closet.”

Y/N followed Max down a hallway, Jimmy and Sassy trotting behind them like loyal sidekicks. They reached a door, and Max swung it open, revealing a walk-in closet that could easily rival a small boutique. Shelves lined the walls, each one meticulously stacked with Red Bull merchandise in every form imaginable—polos, t-shirts, hoodies, jackets, caps, even socks.

Y/N’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Wow,” she said, turning to look at Max like he was a lunatic. “This is… impressive. And slightly concerning. I didn’t know you could own this much team gear.”

Max rubbed the back of his neck, looking sheepish. “Yeah, well, I like to keep things simple. Plus, they’re comfortable.”

Y/N chuckled, shaking her head. “Simple is one thing, Max. This is an obsession. But don’t worry, I’m here to bring a little variety into your life.”

Max crossed his arms, grinning. “Alright, let’s see what you’ve got then. But I’m warning you, if it’s not comfortable, it’s going straight back in the bag.”

“Challenge accepted,” Y/N said, her eyes gleaming with determination. She turned back to the stack of clothes she had brought and started laying them out, presenting each piece. “Okay, first up, a simple white t-shirt. No logos, just pure comfort. Try it on.”

Max took the shirt, giving it a skeptical look before slipping it on. He stretched his arms, testing the fit. “Okay, I admit, it’s comfortable. What else?”

Y/N’s smile widened. “Next, a pair of dark jeans. Classic, versatile, and they miraculously manage to make even a Red Bull polo look halfway decent.”

She glanced at Max, who was eyeing the jeans with a hint of skepticism. “And don’t worry, Max, I made sure they’re not the skinny jeans you seem to love so much. I couldn’t bear to put you—or anyone else—through that kind of fashion torture.”

Max grabbed the jeans and ducked into the bathroom to change. When he came back out, Y/N couldn’t help but beam. He looked good—casual but put together, like someone who actually cared about his appearance.

Max glanced at himself in the mirror and nodded approvingly. “Not bad. Not bad at all. What’s next?”

Y/N pulled out a light gray hoodie. “For when you need an extra layer but want to avoid looking like a walking billboard.”

Max slipped it on, zipping it up halfway. “Okay, I’m impressed. You’ve managed to find things that are comfortable and look good. Maybe you do have some magic up your sleeve.”

Y/N laughed. “Told you. Now, let’s talk about adding some color to your wardrobe?”

Max shrugged. “As long as it’s not neon, I’m open to it.”

Y/N grinned. “Perfect. I’ve got just the thing.” She pulled out a maroon half-zip, soft and stylish. “Try this on.”

Max took it, and as he changed, Y/N felt a sense of satisfaction. This was just the beginning, but she could already see the transformation. And judging by the approving look on Max’s face, he could see it too.

“Well, Y/N, I have to say, you’ve done the impossible. You’ve actually managed to impress me,” Max admitted, his tone light but genuine.

Y/N gave a mock bow. “Thank you, thank you. But we’re just getting started. By the time I’m done with you, you’ll be turning heads both on and off the track.”

Max rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of excitement in his expression that even he cannot hide.

════════════════════════════════════

Max had just stepped out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist as he reached for his phone. The bathroom was filled with steam, giving the air a hazy quality as he scrolled through Instagram.

As he scrolled, his eyes widened in disbelief. There it was, a photo of him in that plain white shirt and the jeans that didn’t look like they were about to tear at the wrong move. The caption read, "Is this real life? Max Verstappen spotted in a non-Red Bull polo, and it’s not even race day! Miracles do happen, folks."

Comments flooded in faster than he could read them all. Some were filled with disbelief, while others were downright ecstatic. "I thought I’d never see the day!" one user exclaimed. "This is like witnessing the rebirth of a man," another commented.

Max couldn’t help but chuckle at the reactions. But there were also theories floating around. "Is Max hiding a new girlfriend from us?" one person speculated. "This has got to be the girlfriend effect," another chimed in. "Or maybe Red Bull has finally hired someone to ransack his closet," someone else joked.

Maybe this whole wardrobe makeover wasn’t such a bad idea after all. And if it meant keeping people guessing, well, that was just an added bonus.

He then scrolled through the messages, which has been buzzing incessantly with notifications.

A text from Charles popped up:

“Hey Max, just saw the photos. Are you alright, mate? Should we send help?”

Max couldn't help but chuckle at the concern in Charles’ message. Then another text came in, this time from Lando:

“Mate, what's going on with the sudden style upgrade?🤔😧 Is Horner holding you hostage or something?”

He typed out a quick reply to both Charles and Lando, assuring them that he was perfectly fine and that there was no need to send a rescue team. As for Horner's involvement, he simply responded with a string of laughing emojis, leaving the mystery of his wardrobe transformation to fuel their imaginations.

════════════════════════════════════

The next week, Max arrived at the Energy Station, still amused by the ongoing chatter about his newfound fashion sense. As he stepped through the door, he was immediately greeted by Horner and Geri, who wore matching expressions of excitement.

“There he is! Congratulations!” Horner exclaimed, clapping him on the back. "The reactions to your new look are absolutely fantastic. People can't stop talking about it!"

Geri's eyes practically sparkled with delight as she enveloped Max in a warm hug. “Oh, Max, I can't tell you how thrilled I am!” she gushed. “You look absolutely fabulous today, dear. That half zip and linen pants combo? Simply divine! Y/N has worked wonders on you.”

Max couldn't help but grin sheepishly at Geri's praise. He glanced down at his outfit, feeling a little self-conscious under the spotlight. “Thanks, Geri,” he replied. “I'm glad you think so.”

Horner nodded enthusiastically. “The fans are loving it, the media is eating it up—this is exactly the kind of attention we need.”

Just then, a group of Red Bull mechanics walked by, their eyes widening in surprise as they took in Max's outfit. “Whoa, that Max?” one of them whispered to his colleague. “Shit, I didn't even recognize him at first without the Red Bull gear.”

It seemed his fashion makeover was causing quite the stir, even among his own team.

Geri beamed at Max. “I've been thinking,” she began. “Maybe we should really consider keeping Y/N around. What do you say?”

He glanced at Horner, who was also watching him expectantly.

After a moment of consideration, Max let out a hearty laugh. “Well, I have to admit Y/N does have a talent for making me look presentable,” he quipped, earning a laugh from Horner. “I wouldn't mind having her stick around.”

Geri clapped her hands together in delight. “I'll talk to Raymond about making it official.”

════════════════════════════════════

That night Max lounged on his couch, his legs stretched out in front of him as he stared at his phone. The excitement of the day hadn't worn off yet, and he was eager to see if Y/N had any news about her contract.

His thumbs danced over the screen as he typed out a message.

“Hey Y/N, have you heard back from Raymond about your contract?”

He barely had time to set his phone down before it buzzed with a reply.

“Not yet, but I'm hopeful! What made you change your mind about keeping me around?”

What made him change his mind indeed?

He hadn't really thought about it, but now that he did, it was clear as day. With a grin, he tapped out his response.

“I guess I just realized that I need someone like you around.”

He replied, his fingers flying across the screen then he hit send.

[alchemistc]

i like your voice in person

Evan's staring at the bed like he's trying to navigate a minefield.

Six months ago that would have sent Tommy on another journey of self-deprecation, a reminder that he'd known Evan wasn't ready for this, known this was a possibility, but Evan, for all his own insecurities, knows what the hell he wants and if he'd felt even an ounce of pressure or remorse up to this point he'd have said something long before now.

Sometimes Evan likes to work it out himself, and sometimes he needs a little nudge, and Tommy watches the head tilt and the angle of his pursed lips for cues as he settles under the sheets.

"Something on your mind?" he prompts, and Evan blinks, like he hadn't realized he'd gotten lost in his thoughts.

"Uh...nothing, maybe."

"Sounds like something, probably."

Evan's smile tilts up at one corner, and he settles on the bed a little stiffly. "It's nothing major. Just. Something I've been thinking about?"

He can feel his brows jumping, can see the way Evan takes in the look with a fond expression. Evan steels himself for something -- they're still muddling through past experiences and learning how to be a bit more intentional in some of their conversations, because they both have a bad habit of reverting to flirting and deflection.

"You remember what we talked about last weekend?"

Tommy can genuinely remember about 93 percent of what he and Evan talk about at any given time, which is an astronomically high number and not at all an exaggeration. He'd be embarrassed about it if he didn't have clear evidence that Evan was as deep into this as he was.

They talk a lot, is the thing, about inconsequential shit just as much (definitely more) than the important stuff. They talk far more than Tommy can remember talking in any other relationship he's been in. But Tommy can pinpoint the exact one he means.

"You mean the roles thing."

Evan hadn't been a stranger to a little daddy talk in bed when they started to explore it, and he'd brought it up right at the start for a reason, but Tommy had taken a while to come around to the realization that Evan had sort of internalized the 'I don't have daddy issues' of it all in a way that Tommy hadn't actually meant it. There'd been little things, here and there; like Evan reaching a door before him and then bashfully waiting with it half open like he'd made a misstep; like twisting his mouth a little funny when he snatched the bill from the table before Tommy could get it. Little things.

Things that, in the abstract, yeah, Tommy liked to do for his partners, but in reality weren't actually that big a deal to him.

He'd needed to clear the air.

Evan nods. Curls a hand around his knee before he shifts his body so that he's facing Tommy. "So, I like taking care of people."

(A conversation, a month ago, Evan grimacing around "My therapist says I have to stop calling myself a people pleaser in a derogatory way.")

Tommy hums, something to remind Evan he's listening.

"And I guess I sort of built up this idea in my head that that was like, a hard stop with you."

("Everyone likes being taken care of sometimes, Evan.")

"And I'm not -- I'm not upset at you, or like, feeling guilty, I just -- I've been thinking about it, and I feel like I forgot to ask you how you wanted to be taken care of."

The thing with Evan is that no matter how often he'll deflect with a joke, when he wants to say something serious he's blunt as hell about it. There might be some hemming and hawing to get there but sometimes he says things that just make Tommy wonder if he'd ever actually learned how to say things before Evan.

"I don't really have a list, babe," he says, and then sort of hates himself for it. Deflect, distract, hey baby how about I blow you about all these big feelings inside my chest I can't articulate.

Evan, though, Evan squinches his eyes and runs a heavy hand through his hair. "I...sort of do?"

"Lay it on me."

Evan grins. "That's actually one of the things on my list."

Tommy blinks. Tries to figure out that trail of thought, but he's coming up with nothing. "Okay, can you expand on that?"

"Like --listen, you know I'm a huge fan of being the little spoon. I'd let someone put screws back in my leg just for continued little spoon privileges. But sometimes I miss being the big spoon, and in my head the idea sounded so stupid to bring up but now I'm wondering if, like, maybe I've just been denying you the joy of being the little spoon?"

Tommy thinks of Evan's hands spread big and warm across his belly, of knees tucked up behind his, warm breath on the back of his neck like when Evan stumbles up behind him in the mornings whining about coffee, and maybe he blue screens a bit because he's never actually dated someone so close to his own size, because there's always been an assumption at the outset that he wouldn't want that.

Alex had been a little too into the same dynamic he'd seen Evan stumbling through, and Colin had hated sleeping with someone's flesh touching his own. Beyond that he hadn't really dated anyone long enough to really form a preference.

Maybe Kara might have been willing, back when he'd been closeted enough to pretend it wasn't an effort to get it up when she had his dick in her mouth, but they'd been young enough that staying the night wasn't really a consideration.

"And like -- listen, I don't necessarily prescribe to gender roles as a thing in general, but a few weekends ago I spent like twenty minutes staring at a bouquet of flowers in Trader Joe's and convinced myself you wouldn't like the gesture so I didn't buy them but you have a few vases in your moms old china cabinet and the moment I remembered them I felt stupid for not buying the flowers."

There's something curling tenderly underneath Tommy's ribcage that he's not sure he's ever felt quite like this before. It's not new, exactly, but it seems to be thrumming particularly hard tonight.

Three months in, Tommy had gotten the man-flu from hell, temperatures so high he'd been grounded and sent packing to rest it off, and he'd texted Evan a jumbled mess of barely discernible things when they'd tucked him into the Uber.

Evan and Bobby had made chicken noodle soup at the station and Hen had sent Evan off with a laundry list of things he could do to help drop the fever, and Tommy had spent the duration sulking and glowering and dragging himself out of bed every time Evan had wanted to change the sheets, to keep Tommy as comfortable as he could, but when Evan had caught it four days later he hadn't hesitated to do all the same shit with gusto. Evan hadn't been particularly grateful either, because neither one of them liked being laid up when the world was out there waiting for them, but he'd at least had the grace to not be an asshole about it.

He had, though. Been grateful. A little awestruck, too, at the mere idea of someone so unafraid of just being there through all the moaning and groaning and hacking and coughing, keeping the tissues from piling up on the bedside table and switching out cold packs to the freezer so he always had one ready in case he wanted it. In the clarity of a full day without fever making his brain feel like cotton candy he'd stared down at a sleepily wheezing Evan and known he could absolutely lose his heart to this man.

"Also I don't want to toot my own horn here but I give excellent foot rubs, and I feel like there's about a million other things I've just been -- holding back from doing?"

"Because of the role thing, or because all your stupid exes told you you were needy?"

It's not a night to pull punches. Also Tommy wants to send thank you cards to every single one of them and attach them to boxes with a bark scorpion inside.

"Both," Evan says without a second of hesitation. His smile crinkles at the corners of his mouth, and Tommy is suddenly annoyed with the space between them. When he holds out his hand to tug Evan into him, Evan melts into it for the space of a moment before he pulls back. "I actually kind of desperately want to be the big spoon right now, if that's something you'd be into." Evan had definitely clocked the look on his face when he'd mentioned it, but he's keyed into the way Tommy checks in and reciprocated in kind since the start of this, so.

Tommy peels his glasses off, snags his bookmark to keep his spot in the monstrosity of the Wrangler maintenance manual he'd stopped being cagey about the fifth time Evan caught him flipping through it, and watches Evan settle comfortably into bed next to him. The problem is, Tommy actually isn't sure where to go from there, which is a ridiculous thought to have because Evan hadn't either and he'd figured it out just fine.

"How do you want me, Buckley?"

The roll of his eyes is so bitchy that Tommy has to remind himself that for all his people pleasing attributes, Evan Buckley is, at heart, a huge fucking brat. Evan tugs and twists and maneuvers his arms and Tommy sort of sinks into it, head tucked in the crook of his shoulder, draping his leg over one of Evan's when he shifts his knee pointedly, a massive, unruly breath escaping Tommy once they're all done shifting.

"You should absolutely try out the rest of your list," he murmurs into the space where Evan's shoulder meets his neck. "Although you don't need to woo me anymore, I'm actually fully wooed."

Lips against his crown, pressed tightly enough that he can feel the smile against his scalp, Evan chuckles. "You don't know how good my wooing is."

The fingers shifting up and down his arm feel somehow different, from this position, even though Evan has done it a hundred times before from the spot he likes to claim with his head right over Tommy's bleeding, three-sizes-too-big-for-him heart. It's ridiculous, and it shouldn't feel any different, but it does. He wants to be greedy with it, soak it in and then never let Evan do this again because he finally understands the appeal and he doesn't want to deprive Evan that.

"This is nicer than I expected."

Evan's soft laugh ruffles his hair, and Tommy wonders if he's dumb enough to ask Eddie how long he should wait before he can reasonably beg Evan to spend the rest of his life with him.

"Save the reviews for when I actually spoon you. It's gonna rock your world." His hand drifts up, fingers digging into the dimple of Tommy's skull.

The hum in his throat has a mind of it's own, going thin and reedy and --

Evan pauses, and Tommy can practically see the gears whirring in his mind, because this is new information.

To both of them, actually, but Tommy doesn't have time to process it because the fingers on the back of his skull spread and sink deeper, just enough pressure to be more than a glancing ruffle, and Tommy can't quite help the way he tilts his head back into it, or the way he hitches his leg to press his groin a little more firmly to the outside of Evan's thigh.

They're both too tired for it to really mean anything -- both off 48's and a fumbled round in the shower while they were already bone weary -- but Tommy wants the reminder for them both when they wake up in the morning.

He can feel his eyes drooping the longer Evan scrubs his fingers against him, and the thought pops into his head as he's drifting off. He doesn't want it to disappear into the fog, though, so he murmurs it into the soft, warm skin of Evan's neck. "I like camellia's. White ones."

Evan hums, and Tommy just knows that the moment he drops off, Evan will be reaching for his phone to google the language of flowers.

[jackhues]

...and maybe it's not love... | oscar piastri

note: here's part 2 <3 i think this will have 3/4 parts, but they might be split up if i reach the picture limit.

prev

pairing: oscar piastri x fem!reader, logan x best friend!reader, one sided!enemies to lovers

faceclaim: various, from pinterest

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youruser

liked by oscarpiastri, y/bffsuser, landonorris & others

youruser: what can i say? i'm a busy gal

user: bae... are you soft launching someone or is this just logan again? -> logansargeant: it's not me -> user: LOGAN MY GLORIOUS AMERICAN KING! WHO IS THIS??

user: why are the f1 boys here?? -> user: bcz she took a picture with oscar and i guess they're all friends now -> user: and it's only lando. quite overreacting

yourmomsig: too busy for family dinner -> youruser: ma if it was only our family i'd have been there. i just wasn't in the mood to deal with aunt griselda -> logansargeant: yeah thanks for that, i had to take ur place -> youruser: love you logie

logansargeant: you know you idiots are so cute it almost makes up for making me have dinner with aunt griselda -> user: stop he calls her aunt, 'aunt' - those two are siblings your honors -> youruser: i already told you i love you... what more do you want?

user: GIRL ARE YOU BACK WITH YOUR EX? -> youruser: ew no

user: come home the kids miss you

user: bae who is this man you're taking pics with? do i have to be jealous? -> youruser: nah we're just friends -> user: YOU MEAN YOU'RE FREAKING US ALL OUT TO TELL US THE MAN DIDN'T EVEN MAKE IT OFFICIAL YET?? -> youruser: i'm actually crying at this comment this is the funniest fucking thing i've ever read- -> oscarpiastri: she has literal tears streaming down her face -> user: ARIANA? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

oscarpiastri: too busy of a gal to answer your texts? -> youruser: depends on who it is -> user: guys stop logan's besties are becoming besties- i love this!

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youruser

liked by logansargeant, landonorris, oscarpiastri & others

youruser: signin' out

oscarpiastri: photo creds? -> youruser: no -> user: wait... oscar was at the graduation??????? -> user: i don't think so... he took the first and/or third picture and neither of them are at the ceremony itself. i think he was just invited to the party -> user: quit crushing my dreams girl

logansargeant: proud of you 🤍 -> youruser: love you logie 🤍

landonorris: just in time for hot girl summer -> youruser: 🤪🤪

user: wait i thought she already graduated -> user: this is her law school graduation i think -> user: isn't she like 23?? how?? -> youruser: max course loads + studying during summers! wasn't fun, but i'm FREEEEE

user: girlBOSS

y/bffsuser: i love you !! so so proud -> youruser: i adore you 😘

yourmomsig: love you sweetie, i'm so proud of you -> youruser: love you more ma

user: wait where's the 'friend' she was soft launching a while back -> youruser: we're still going good, trust -> user: lowkey think it's oscar

--

yourprivuser

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, y/bffsuser & others

youruser: fun night with fun people

tagged: y/bffsuser, oscarpiastri, logansargeant, friend2, friend3, friend4

oscarpiastri: probably the closest i'll be to graduating -> youruser: it's why i graduated twice, once for me, once for you

y/bffsuser: girl my face was not nice in that last pic -> youruser: puhleasee you look hot

logansargeant: i feel like there's someone you need to thank for all of this -> youruser: uhhhh god? -> logansargeant: girlllllll -> youruser: ugh thank you logan hunter sargeant, the greatest american to have ever lived

--

f1gossip

liked by user, user, user & others

f1gossip: sources say that oscar piastri was in fort lauderdale between the canadian and brazilian gp. he was most likely there for y/n y/ln's graduation, but we cannot confirm if he attended the ceremony or only the party afterwards. the two know each other through their best friend logan sargeant, and we can confirm that they've only become friends during the miami gp, which is around the same time y/n began soft launching someone she calls a 'friend'

many think her and oscar piastri have started or are starting a relationship, and the belief has been cemented by him attending her graduation party. these pictures look like oscar and y/n going out for dinner with her friends, holding hands at one point, and then hanging out at oscar's hotel afterwards. we cannot confirm or deny that any of these pictures are in fact oscar and y/n as they aren't clear, but they do look similar to them.

for more information on y/n y/ln, check out the link in our bio

tagged: oscarpiastri, youruser, logansargeant

user: i ship them

user: bro who even is she??

user: how much y'all wanna bet she's not even really friends with logan?

user: that doesn't even look like oscar, y'all wilding

user: maybe he's just there to support a friend (in denial)

user: she doesn't look good

user: i don't like them together

user: oscar's too good for her

user: y'all hella interested in people who don't give a shit about you

youruser: wow my very own post on f1gossip- mom look i made it -> yourmomsig: congrats baby -> user: HER MOM ACTUALLY COMMENTED LMAOOOOO -> user: i changed my mind i stan her -> user: guys i really hope she's with oscar -> user: i don't think she is 😢 otherwise she'd probably ignore this post

user: y'all as much as i love them, i doubt they're together- most wags ignore these posts and this chick's out here commenting and calling her mom 💀

--

--

--

Y/N STARED AT THE MCLAREN CAP, unsure if she should wear it. It shouldn't mean anything to the public, just her showing support to one of her new friends. Because to them, that's all Oscar really was. Her friend.

They didn't know about the constant texts, the late night face times, the movie dates while across an ocean from each other. They didn't know about the way her heart would race whenever she saw his text, how he'd make her giggly and blush just by calling her a cute little nickname. They knew nothing.

Besides, she was wearing a Williams Racing shirt in support of Logan. Why should a simple McLaren cap - not even fully papaya colored - mean anything to the public?

"Oh my God, just put the cap on," Logan groaned, making way over and putting it on her head for her.

Y/N rolled her eyes, fixing the cap so it didn't ruin her hair.

"Shut up," she muttered. "I'm just nervous."

"You have no need to be," Logan promised her. "Oscar's going to lose his mind when he sees you in person, turn into a stuttering, stumbling mess, and you're going to be so touched by his awkwardness that you're going fall in love. All in all, it's a win-win situation."

"I don't like you," Y/N rolled her eyes, following Logan out of the hotel and in the car. She had arrived in England a few days ago, but kept a low profile. She missed the first two practices, before deciding to arrive on track for FP3 and quali. She'd also make her way over for the race tomorrow.

The two best friends shared TikToks and reels with each other during the short drive, making their way out of the car and towards the paddock once they arrived. Y/N tried to keep her hands at her sides, away from the McLaren cap on her head. No need to make it obvious. Cameras flashed and recorded videos as her and Logan walked down, making her incredibly nervous.

She felt hot, really hot. And... was she sweating? She resisted the urge to smell.

"You're fine," Logan promised, sensing her inner anxiety. "Nobody's focusing on your cap, they take videos of all the drivers arriving at track. Stop spiraling."

Y/N blinked back to the present at Logan's words, realizing that she was indeed falling into a spiral. It was all going to be okay. Logan was going to be there no matter what.

"Thanks Logie," she smiled. "You're the best."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded to himself.

She rolled her eyes, swatting him in the arm. Arriving outside the Williams' garage, she waved at Alex Albon.

"Hey, Y/N," he jogged over from inside. "How are you? Logan never even told me you're coming."

"I'm great Alex, thanks," she grinned. "And it was a bit of a surprise. I didn't want people to know I was coming here today. I have a job interview in a few days, so I decided why not come early and watch the GP in person."

"Good decision," he laughed. He looked at her cap, "Are you heading inside or heading to McLaren?"

"Uh... I think I'll head over to McLaren," she decided. "I don't want news of my arrival reaching Oscar before I get to surprise him."

Alex raised his brows, before fixing his expression, "Right, you guys finally met at Miami. I take it you became friends, right?"

"Yeah," Y/N nodded, trying not to let her heart eyes show. "I probably should've taken Logan's offer to meet his racing friends years ago. Most of them are pretty cool."

"I hope I'm one of them," Alex joked.

"You're at the top of the list," she winked. "Anyways, I'll catch you guys later on. Don't leave without me Logan."

"Same goes to you," he waved.

Y/N flipped him off, turning to make her way to McLaren garage. She could hear Logan's laughter behind her, making her smile to herself. Who knew when the last time he genuinely laughed on a race weekend even was?

Over the last few months, she'd seen lots of clips of Oscar and Logan hanging out together - more than usual - and usually joining them was Lando. It seemed that the Brit was interested in becoming friends with Logan after Miami, which honestly made her happy.

She arrived outside the McLaren garage, debating if she should head in or wait outside, or maybe just head back to Williams.

Before she could make up her mind, she heard someone make a surprised little noise.

"Y/N?" Lando asked, exiting the garage once he saw her. "You're here? Oscar that little brat, he never even told me you're going to visit."

"That's because he doesn't know," Y/N laughed. "It's a surprise. I kind of insinuated that I wouldn't be able to watch the race at all, but... well, I'm here!"

"Ugh you two are just so absolutely adorable," Lando sighed, slinging an arm over her shoulder. "C'mon, I'll take you to him. He said he's going to talk to his dad, I think."

"His dad's here?" She asked, stopping in her tracks. "Why did no one tell me his dad was going to be here?"

"Quit freaking out," Lando rolled his eyes. "His real dad's not here, I don't think."

"Then who is he — Charles?" Y/N asked. "They're still doing that little bit from Monaco."

Lando pointed to where Oscar was, indeed talking with someone in Ferrari gear. Y/N stood on her tiptoes, recognizing Charles Leclerc and his girlfriend, in the middle of some conversation with Oscar. Leo slept soundly in Alexandra's arms.

"Let's wait for them to finish their conversation," Y/N suggested, feeling bad for coming up to them while they were talking.

"Nope," Lando shook his head, leading her across and closer to Oscar.

"Lando, no, no, no, Lando, I will throw you under one of the cars, no, Lando—"

"Quick, laugh like I said something funny," Lando whispered.

Y/N was so surprised by his request, that she stopped trying to plot his murder.

"Laugh, woman!" Lando muttered.

"Oh, right," Y/N responded.

Trying her best to seem somewhat genuine, she thought of that time Oscar texted her because he walked into a pole. Which made her laugh so hard, she walked into a door.

She giggled at the memory, laughing as the duo approached the others.

Lando, seeing Oscar's head whip over immediately at the sound of her laughter, began giggling too. The two had to stop a few steps away from Oscar, Charles and Alexandra because of how hard they were laughing.

"Did you see— the way he—" Lando couldn't get a sentence out without bursting into another round of laughter.

"Lando, get your shit together," Y/N wiped her eyes, straightening up.

Charles and Alex raised their eyebrows, entirely confused by what was happening a few steps away from them, while Oscar stared at Y/N like she was a mound of gold.

"Okay, okay— never mind, I can't do it," Lando fell into another round of laughter every time he remembered how quickly Oscar looked at her.

"Oh my God," Y/N muttered, sending an apologetic smile towards the trio near them.

She grabbed Lando's arm and dragged him the final few steps, smiling at the small group.

"I'm so sorry about that," she apologized. "Lando here doesn't know how to behave."

At this point, Lando's laughter, which was finally beginning to stop, starting up all over again.

"I'm sorry guys, I'm so sorry," Lando got out. "I'm not laughing at you guys, I promise. I'm laughing at Osc."

"What did I do?" Oscar asked, finally snapping out of whatever trance he'd gone in after hearing Y/N's laughter.

At his question, Lando's laughter came back, this time high pitched and bringing on some tears.

Y/N leaned closer to Oscar, whispering, "Is this normal?"

"Just ignore him," he responded, hoping she couldn't hear his heart beating all over his body. "It'll stop eventually."

"If it doesn't it'll give the rest of us an edge in the race," Charles offered.

"Right, uh Charles, Alexandra, this is Y/N," Oscar introduced them, the group now choosing to ignore Lando as he sat on the floor and laughed some more. "She's uh, a friend of mine, and also Logan's best friend. She usually only comes to Miami, but apparently is here today."

"Surprise!" She grinned.

Oscar smiled, the feeling of her happiness radiating towards him. Maybe he liked surprises a lot more than he realized.

"Logan, uh..."

"Sargeant," Lando supplied to Charles from his spot on the floor, wiping his eyes to clear up some tears. "The one who drives for Williams."

Y/N's smile dipped slightly at the reminder that Charles was another driver who wasn't quite close with Logan. But she brought the smile back immediately, doing her best to be nice.

In fact, it was only because Oscar had his eyes on Y/N the entire time that he noticed the small dip. He didn't know just what it was about, but he remembered her make the same expression when she first met Lando.

"Right, yeah," Charles nodded. "I just wanted to make sure I had the right one. It's nice to meet you, Y/N. I'm Charles, and this is my girlfriend Alex."

"Nice to meet you guys," she smiled again, and it was as if nothing was wrong. She cooed at Leo asleep in Alex's arms, "Aw, cute dog. I've been more of a cat person my whole life, but I love puppies."

"His name's Leo," Alex introduced the dog.

"Oh, he's adorable," she grinned.

"Well, it was nice to meet you Y/N," Charles nodded in her direction. "We've got to go now, but hopefully we'll see you later on. Bye Lando, bye son."

"Bye dad," Oscar laughed.

"Bye," Lando waved at them.

Once they were gone, Y/N looked back at Oscar, only to see him already looking at her.

"Hi," she smiled.

"Hey," he breathed out.

"Oi, you two are being too lovey dovey in front of the cameras," Lando warned them. "Go to the motorhome or something."

Y/N rolled her eyes, but he wasn't wrong. There were much more cameras around McLaren than Williams, and people would be dissecting Y/N and Oscar's every move. Considering they weren't even dating, she wanted to keep the secret for a little while longer.

"Right, uh... you wanna come along, Y/N?" Oscar asked her.

"Sure, I'm not due back at Williams until the end of the day," she shrugged. "I got to return my paddock pass then. Coming, Lando?"

"No thank you," he shook his head. "I like my spot on the floor, and I'd rather not accidentally be a cockblock."

"Lando, we're not going to have sex in Oscar's motorhome," Y/N rolled her eyes.

"We're not?" Oscar asked, a joking glint in his eyes.

"Take me out on a date first, then we'll see," she responded in the same tone, turning towards the motorhome and making her way there.

"Hey, I already asked," he reminded her, catching up. "It's up to you to decide when you're cashing in the rain check."

Y/N tilted her head at him, a small smile making its way to her face. "Tell you what, you win the race tomorrow, I'll go on a date with you the next day."

Oscar smirked, "Well, I have to win the race now."

"Nice to know where your motivation factor lies."

The two arrived outside the room, and Oscar opened the door for her.

"What a gentleman," Y/N grinned to herself, entering the small space.

She took a seat on the bed, while Oscar sat in the chair by the desk.

"Are you okay?" Oscar asked once it was just the two of them, no cameras, no Lando, no one else.

"What do you mean?" Y/N asked. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine, there's something bothering you," Oscar noted. "Or it did bother you at one point. When you were talking to Charles and Alex, you frowned at the start of the conversation. Right after I'd introduced you to them. Like, as if you were upset by something they said or did, I don't know."

Y/N frowned again at the reminder of that interaction, before shaking her head quickly to clear her thoughts.

"Nothing, I mean... like it's not a big deal," she tried to explain. "It's just this weird thing about me."

"You know you can trust me with anything, right?"

"I know, Oscar," she sighed. "It's just... it's complicated, I guess."

"If you want to talk about it, I've got time," he responded.

Y/N stared at him, remembering how she thought she hated him just a few months ago. She saw him as an egotistic prick, who'd left her best friend in the dust after stealing him from her. And here he was now... telling her he'd listen to her if she wanted him to.

"I didn't like you for a long time," she confessed.

At Oscar's hurt look, she continued quickly.

"Wait, no, that didn't come out the way I wanted," she closed her eyes. "I mean, like when we were kids, a long, long time ago. Because, for our entire lives, it'd been Logan and I. We did everything together, always. And then he got serious with racing, and he made other friends. Which was fine by me, because I'd always been his best friend. The only one who managed to come close to my position in Logan's eyes, was you. You were the one who'd managed to be one of his closest friends, because of racing, and you were the one who was closest to taking my place. And... well I was jealous. Which was why I often ran away after Logan's races, never stopped to meet you or talk with you, or any of the other drivers.

"And, you know, the years passed, and Logan and I remained close, and the jealousy faded, but then, I don't know. I guess I was embarrassed to talk to you, because I'd been jealous for so long. And then you both went into F1, and I told myself I'd be happy for both of you... but I wasn't, really. You just— I mean, you came into F1, and the love for you was immediate. The fans, your team, the other drivers. They all loved you, and they wanted to talk to you. And Logan... Logan got stuck with a shitty car and a shitty team, and none of the drivers even wanted to talk to him."

She took a deep breath, continuing, "and I know it's not your fault, but I love Logan, okay? Like I'd quite literally give up my life for him, and seeing him constantly in a place where he wasn't being treated fairly, where he wasn't happy.... it hurts. He's here because he loves racing, but every time people talk shit about him or act like he didn't put in so much work to be here, it makes me upset. I was... I don't know, envious of you on behalf of Logan, if that makes sense. And so I kind of ignored you during F1 as well. But then I began talking to you, and that first time I heard you speak, stumbling over your words, I think that's when I realized you were human. Just like Logan. You didn't choose it to be this way and you can't help it. And you know, a lot of times I can forget most of the people out there have never acknowledged Logan, because he's asked me to forget it so many times, but then they remind me that they haven't... and it hurts, Oscar. It hurts to see that. So you know, I'm sorry for judging you before ever even meeting you. That was stupid of me."

Oscar stared at her for a moment, feeling sick at her words. He'd never had someone who he was that close with, not outside of his family. He couldn't even imagine what went through her head every time she saw him, or the other drivers. He didn't blame her for her feelings, she had every right to hate anyone out there.

"Oscar?" she began hesitantly. "Are you... are you alright?"

He got up from his chair, standing in front of her and pulling her close. She immediately wrapped her arms around his waist, melting into his hug.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm sorry that I let it happen."

"Oscar, it's not your fault," she said, her voice muffled by his embrace. "I realize that now, and it's something Logan's always known. He's never blamed you, I don't either. It's just the way life works."

"It's not great," Oscar commented.

"Nah, not really," she agreed. "But it won't stay like this forever."

She wouldn't let it.

--

f1

liked by youruser, logansargeant, y/bffsuser & others

f1: and it's the FIRST career GRAND PRIX WIN for oscar piastri! a daring move by the aussie in the final laps of the race put him ahead of max verstappen and as the leader of the race, where he led quite comfortably to the checkered flag

mclaren: that's our guy!!

user: OSCARRRRR GO OFF

user: LOGAN IN POINTS SOMEONE TALK ABOUT LOGAN IN POINTS -> user: your honor they're boyfriends

youruser: wow a race winner -> oscarpiastri: it was nothing

user: OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR OSCAR

user: someone check on y/n -> user: ???? -> user: well her and oscar might be dating no one knows. but she's besties with logan, and one of them won and the other's in points so she might be celebrating

--

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, landonorris, logansargeant & others

oscarpiastri: winning the race ➡️ winning in life

user: OSCAR JACK PIASTRI!! WHO IS THIS???

user: mans just dropped a whole bomb and left

user: boy isn't responding to ANYONE -> user: he said 'look at my girl' and then dipped

user: y'all that's y/n i'm calling it -> user: no she looks too tall in the second pic -> user: i think she's wearing heels

user: oscar get your ass back on this app and answer the peoples' questions -> oscarpiastri: no.

youruser: ugh i love her nails -> oscarpiastri: 🙄 she said thanks babe -> youruser: your girl loves me more than you -> oscarpiastri: i'm afraid it may be so

user: NAH IT AINT Y/N! LOOK AT HER COMMENTS

user: y/n bestie boo tell us who oscar's new girl is -> youruser: no.

user: y/n and oscar are hilarious bcz she's been soft launching her 'friend' for months and now oscar's hiding a whole girlfriend from us -> user: i see what logan meant when he said they're too similar but also completely opposite

user: i still think the girl's y/n

--

--

youruser:

liked by y/bffsuser, logansargeant, landonorris & others

youruser: summer of 24... you were definitely one for the books

tagged: oscarpiastri

user: YOU'VE BEEN SOFTLAUNCHING OSCAR ALL ALONG????

user: the way i didn't actually see this one coming

user: I FUCKING KNEW ITT

oscarpiastri: best summer yet 🩷 -> youruser: got me blushing and shii

logansargeant: i'd like a written thank you card for being the reason you two are together -> youruser: no 🤍

user: i just KNOW logan's been their biggest shipper

yourmomsig: cutiess

--

oscarpiastri

liked by youruser, charles_leclerc, logansargeant & others

oscarpiastri: it's been ten years in the making

tagged: youruser

user: SHUT UP

user: wait they've been dating for TEN YEARS??!! -> user: no i think he had a crush on her for like ten years

youruser: i adore you 🩷 -> oscarpiastri: it's hard not to adore me

youruser: s i m p -> oscarpiastri: are you complaining? -> youruser: no

logansargeant: again. am i getting a thank you at all??? -> oscarpiastri: sorry my future wife said no -> youruser: jasdjfakhfrshgous -> user: nah she real for that- i'd do the same if oscar said that about me

user: she needs to lose some weight

user: ew why does she smile like that

user: MOM AND DAD

landonorris: i'd also like a thank you for not being a cockblock -> oscarpiastri: no.

--

f1gossip

liked by user, user, user & others

f1gossip: well it's officially been confirmed by oscar piastri and y/n y/ln that they are dating and have been together for at least the summer. it's unclear when they began dating, but we can assume it was after the miami grand prix, where it is believed that they met for the first time.

y/n y/ln is the childhood best friend of logan sargeant, and has took to social media multiple times to defend him. she has completed law school, and we believe she works in england, which is where oscar is located at the moment. for more information on y/n y/ln and the timeline of her and oscar piastri's relationship, check the link in our bio

user: bro who cares

user: i thought this was a driver gossip page not the wags

user: what does oscar see in her? -> user: right like she has to have bewitched him

user: i love her she's such a girlboss

user: idk how oscar does it. my brain would stop working once she smiled at me

user: something about their relationship screams pr to me -> user: like wdym they only met in miami bcz fans wanted them to and now they're dating -> user: nah that's sketchy

--

--

notes: well here's the anticipated part 2!! i hope you guys enjoy it! if you'd like to be added to my tag list, please comment on part one of this series just so all the comments are in one place. let me know what you guys think of this part in the comments + reblogs <3

and again my tags don't always work, so you might want to follow my writing tag 'naqia writes!' or the tag for this short series 'the bsf of my bsf! series' so they show up on your dash at some point :)

don't forget to like AND reblog!!

tags: @ravisinghs-wife , @urfavsgf , @mxdi0 , @lemon-lav , @lilipiggytails , @stinkyjax , @blckgrl-sunflower , @littlemisssummer , @dreamsarebig , @k-pevensie28 , @themislovesf1 , @hellowgoodbye , @chezmardybum , @5sospenguinqueen , @charlotte1697 , @stylestastic , @sie17136 , @2lsargeant , @softpiastri <33

[penvisions]

gone to the dogs {chapter one}

Pairing: Boston QZ! Joel Miller x F! Reader

Summary: Bared teeth and instincts are all you have to defend yourself while out beyond the walls of the zone. And sometimes, you have Joel Miller, though he's just as apt to turn on you as anyone else.

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical language, canon typical gore, outbreak fic, age gap (only by about ten years), dark fic, dark joel miller, mean joel miller, joel miller is uptight, degrading language, sexual language, sexual proposition, violence, heated interactions, adult language, fighting, references to injuries, blood, one (1) instance of joel miller bashing someone's head in, gun use, gun violence, reader chokes someone out, reader is snarky, reader meets joel toe-to-toe with insults and it's amazing both reader and joel pov, lemme know if there are any i missed!

A/N: this is different by far than anything else i've written and shared. dark joel miller content tends to be so controversial sometimes but i've been wanting to explore this part of his character for quite a while. the reader insert is also far more...robust than any i've written but it's all so exciting! please lemme know what y'all think?

ao3 link || series masterlist || navigation || ko-fi

The tracks are faint, you’re barely able to make them out yourself as you crouch low to the ground and move your hand in the direction they look like they’re headed in.

“Hey, you missed somethin’.”

“The hell you talking about, there ain’t nothin’ to miss.” He’s suddenly hovering over you, his own footfalls silent despite the pain you know he carries in his back and the swagger he has to adapt to not irritate it. He’s shining his flashlight on the imprint you had managed to find among all the dirt and rubble, a barely there scrape in the dirt that could be mistaken for anything. His voice is harsh, degrading in tone as he scoffs at your find. “You didn’t find shit, stop trying to make somethin’ outta nothin’.”

“Yeah and I suppose the marks that look about the same depth and span out in an even trail heading north ain’t shit either, huh?” You ignore the heat of his legs clad in faded and dirt smeared denim far too close for comfort. It would be easy to brush against them if you turned just slightly. Straitening back up to your full height, you don’t step back as you aim your own light over the similar marks that lead down a narrow path between the scattered and broken bricks. “It’s someone’s staggered gait, would bet they twisted their ankle or knee and it’s dragging enough to leave ‘em behind for us. Need to trust the younger pair of eyes we’ve got out here.”

“Don’t mean it’s our guy.” Joel doesn’t budge, ignoring the double whammy insult, head turning back at the hush of wind sweeping between the crumbling buildings. He turns his light off, securing it between his belt and waistband on the back of his hip. You know he knows there’s some truth to your words with how he ignores them. A habit of his you picked up, silence in the wake of begrudging agreement. Never voiced lest someone overhear that he had his moments of amenable tendencies, even if they were very rare and far between.

“Could be.” You insist, you knew what you were doing. You knew how to get the damn job done and if he heeded your words even once, he would realize it could make the situation go a whole lot smoother than it had been. But of course he doesn’t, he’s as stubborn as you are. Something you loathe about the man who had become one of your partners. It was hard to trust him when he didn’t trust you, constantly at odds with the gruff way he insisted he knew better. It was beginning to get on your nerves, the days harder when you had to interact with him in such close proximity.

“Could be isn’t good enough.”

“Do you need a blowjob or something?” You turn slightly to face him, his strong profile highlighted by the dark golden hues of the setting sun.

“Excuse me?" He pinned you with a dark glare, not taking kindly to your question. He’s chest to chest with you now, hard expression aimed down at you as you don’t move an inch. You wouldn’t back down, never had before and wouldn’t now. He may be intimidating, but you were too in your own ways. Hell, the first encounter you had with the man ended up with your knife at his throat and your knee over his crotch.

Him and Tess had been in your apartment, staking out the smuggling ‘competition’ once they had arrived in the Boston zone. Coming home from a rather painful migraine after shoveling ashes of deceased people had been one of the highlights of the day, if such a thing could even be considered that, only to find two strange people rummaging around through your things. Joel hadn’t been prepared for you to turn on him first, thinking he had hidden himself well in the shadow of your door and following it as you slowly closed it behind you.

A warning shot fired off at Tess had her scrambling behind the beat-up couch in the middle of the room while you turned on him. Only after demanding answers from them and getting them from the woman as she crouched behind the furniture, had you backed down from a stoic Joel.  

“You heard me. You're pent up and snapping at everyone, need some relief?" Tilting your chin up, you meet his dark gaze head on, smirk pulling your lips up on one side. His eyes dilate just the slightest bit before narrowing, but you caught it and he knows you did. His voice is the deepest you’ve ever heard as he slowly responds with only one syllable.

“No."

"I think you do. Don't think I haven't seen the way your eyes drag down my body when you're walking behind me.” A bold statement, but a true one nonetheless. His eyes were a heavy and heady weight whenever they did exactly what you taunted. The thrill of the older man merely looking at you when he thought you wouldn’t see it perked up your self-esteem in a way you weren’t completely immune to, even in the shambles of what the world had turned into.

"Delusional. you're a delusional little-“

"I’m not a little girl, and you damn well know that." You punch the tip of your pointer finger into his chest, the dirty denim warm from his body heat. He’s a big man with a big reputation and it’s hard not to feel powerful as you obviously found one of the weak spots of his soft underbelly. An attack dog, a guard dog, a rabid dog, they all had one thing in common. They were only as strongest as their weakest point.

And you think you just found his.

The mischief of the unexpected discovery must glint in your eyes because his brows furrow impossibly deeper. The frown lines around his mouth pulling his thick mustache down, though it does nothing to shield the pale pink of his full lips.

He scoffs again, a harsh sound from the depths of his chest. Smacking your hand away from him, he takes off to follow the trail he can see a little better now that you’ve pointed it out.

“Coulda fooled me.”

“Act like you’re hot shit around the zone, only reason people don’t mess with you is cause of me.”

“I was doin’ just fine on my own. Remind me again, who staked out who to scope out the competition?”

“Wouldn't let you touch me if I was at the end of a barrel, and it was my saving grace."

“Fuck off, Miller.” You spit back, unable to rise to his taunt even as you fall in line beside him. That one stung, you had to admit. It was your own stupid fault, for finding him so attractive. From his dark hair threaded with silver to the way he carried a lifetime on his shoulders.

But his attitude muddied it, he was no better than a lot of the men you had run into before reuniting with your brother. The end of the world bringing out the worst in people, just like you had never one to sling insults so harshly or tease people easily a decade older than yourself who could snap your neck with a well-placed grip. Just like you assumed the man Joel had been before all this wouldn’t have even dared to think of talking to a woman with such spite and malice, if his faded accent told you more than he ever would.

The trail ends just at the shattered glass of what was once a revolving door entrance to a skyscraper looms ahead. There’s fresh blood splatter and the bag of supplies stolen from where they had been hidden for you and Joel to pick up. Two shells from a gun lay on the ground beside it, and you quickly grip your handgun to survey the area for the culprit who fired the shots.

Joel holds up two fingers, your attention going to him almost instinctively as he motions for you to crouch and round the left side of what remains of the door and into the building after the drops of blood. His eyes are focused, his full lips a hard line as he nods once to make sure you understand him.

Only looking away once you return the gesture. He turns so his back is to yours and makes sure there’s enough coverage for you both with his own gun at the ready. As quietly as you can manage with what’s still hopefully inside the pack, you pick it up with your free hand and avoid as much glass as possible.

No shots ring out, no bullets lodge themselves into your shoulder or Joel’s, everything is eerily still as you both move in tandem to seek the protection of the building. It seems to be blocked off inside, large pieces of plywood secured over the doors that had once been for elevators. The emergency exit off the right barricaded with all the furniture that once filled the ground floor waiting area.

“Fuckin’ told you it was a trail.” You mumble as the conflict seems to be over, the body of the man who had taken off with your hidden pack behind the front desk. Fresh blood seeping from a gunshot wound to his neck and the bandage wrapped thick around his ankle. You don’t flinch when Joel brushes past you harshly to stomp the bottom of his worn boots into the man’s head or the sick crunch that echoes slightly in the open space. Ensuring he doesn’t turn if he had been infected.

He rounds on you quickly enough to stir your instincts, the fleeting fear of him doing the same to you flaring up and making you take a half step back at the fierce look in his eye. The words he practically growls at you making your heart stutter painfully in your chest, suddenly breathless at the combination.

“Would you shut your fuckin’ mouth before I shut it for you? Tired of hearing that shrill voice all the god damn time.”

You huff, trying to play off the fear as indifference, shoving the bag of supplies at him. He doesn’t move to catch it, allowing it to hit him square in the chest, the pills and bullets contained inside rattling as the entire thing fell to the ground with a thunk.

Joel could only watch as you stalked off without another word, shoulders tense and hands shoved deep in the pockets of your jacket. He had seen the dilation of your eyes, the way your chest had risen with a quick inhale at his intensity. He had scared you.

That was new and he wasn’t sure if he liked it any better than you teasing him about being uptight and needing a little bit of pleasure in his life. An unpleasant lump rises in his throat and he tries to swallow it down.

Frowning, he bends to pick up the fallen pack, shoving it into his own nearly empty one before following after you. The silence that had fallen allows him to pick up the faint sound of labored breathing. But it isn’t coming from you up ahead.

It must’ve registered as a third person in the same instant for you because you’re turning to him with a finger pressed to your lips as you crouch behind a chunk of blasted concrete, gun already in hand. He mirrors you, reflections of each other as you each move around the barrier and take an assessing peak around respective corners.

Another man is laid out a few yards away, upper body slumped heavily on against the tire of a rusted car.

He’s barely alive, his breath rattling in his chest at a timbre that could only signal his impending death. A stark sound he recalls from a time long ago, both painfully fresh and numbed by years of oppression. He blinks the sound away, eyes closed for barely a second before you’re closing the distance with quick and quiet movements. A lunging dog at the sight of a threat. Constantly poised to take out anything that challenged the life you clung to.

It’s a reminder of why he willingly works with you, the way your smaller hands close around the man’s neck and clench. Shoulders displaying the strength you possess even with rationed food and improper amenities for life. If he wasn’t on your side, you would turn those same hands on him without a second thought. You had the first time you had met, when he had willingly gone into the den you had created for yourself in search of answers. In search of the name people gave when asked about who had the most knowledge on how to sneak out of the zone he now resides in.

He watches as you pick the man’s corpse clean, ration cards going in your pocket that he doesn’t think to demand a fair share of. Of the gun you hold out to him in silent offer.

No words are exchanged as you lead him back to the perimeter of the zone as the sun dips completely below the horizon. Moonlight illuminating your body effortlessly slinking and squeezing into places you had picked out that would allow for him to do the same with little trouble. You knew the operations of the zone, hell you probably were the reason some of them were orchestrated the way they were. The fear he had seen in you may have been fleeting, a response that allowed you to recognize the threat he could pose to you as well, but the way he admired your will to survive was not.

You only stay at his side long enough to relay the run to Tess, who had stayed behind and worked to ensure an alibi for you both. Signing your names and hers with one of the soldiers who traded with you on the roster in a perfect imitation of keeping up appearances for the demanded duties of all that reside in the zone. The ration cards slid into your back pocket are handed off to the older woman, no words or sounds coming from you before you slink out the door to their shared excuse of an apartment and down the hall to yours.

But he knew better than to think it was with wounded pride and your tail tucked between your legs, because he could hear the way you moved about your own space through the thin walls as if it had just been another day. Tess is watching him as his head tilts where he slumps on the couch, ears following the shuffle of your steps and the sound of clinking as you go about your own business. When he turns to meet her gaze, it’s unreadable but she doesn’t ask the reason for his short run down of what happened or the silence you had fallen into.

next chapter

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[mikobeautifulheart]

Jealous, protective megumi pls??

- 🐌

OMG I MISSED YOU SM. 🤧 my saviour anon.

And Absolutely.

Jealous and protective Megumi

After being stranded in heavy rain you wait for your boyfriend to pick you up. What you weren't expecting was to met one of his acquaintances while waiting. He didn't either.

Sitting under the bus shelter you looked down at your phone to read the time. You had been there for well over 10 minutes and the rain had no sign of stopping or getting any lighter.

You felt your phone vibrate and saw that Megumi was calling you.

"Hel-"

"I have your umbrella"

"Yeah I figured *sigh*"

"Where are you? I'll pick you up."

"I'm at the bus shelter, near the school."

"Okay wait there, I'll be-."

The rain poured harder making it hard to hear him over the phone.

"Megumi? I can't hear you?"

No response. You hung up.

He sent a text saying that he was on his way.

Just as the rain had got worse before you heard heavy footsteps of someone running under the bus shelter to.

You looked up from your phone to see a person doubled over, absolutely drenched and exhausted. After a few seconds they caught there breath and stood up, occasionally glancing at you.

"Forget your umbrella to?" He asked politely, just engaging in small talk.

"Ha yeah... I should have checked the weather report today."

"Yeah"

The rain kept going as you two stayed silent.

"Got far to go?" He spoke again, this time looking at you until you faced him.

"Oh well, not really I was just going to run to the school up there but the rain keeps getting worse." You smiled

"School? You don't mean that really small one surrounded by bamboo, do you?"

"That's the one"

"So are you a sorcerer too?"

"How did you know?"

"I'm going to Jujutsu high to"

Back at Megumi's dorm he's getting a weird feeling in his stomach, like something was eating him alive.

"Yeah I'm actually a second year but I was training in another country"

"Really, that's so cool! How come I've never heard of you?"

"Honestly I was a bit of a loser" he laughed and so did you.

"That can't be true, you look so cool and mysterious."

You noticed that it was silent again and you looked over to see that the guy was now looking straight in front of him, ears red.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make it awkward..." You said with a nervous chuckle.

"Oh NO, No Not at all" he said even redder now as he stumbled over his words.

"Um, I was just wondering..."

You felt a cold hand intertwine its fingers with yours, to your surprise you saw Megumi standing inbetween you two holding pa wide umbrella.

"Oh Megumi, Hi" you said not noticing the glare he was shooting the guy.

"Hey Fushiguro, how are you?" The guy said nervously scratching the back of his neck.

"I'm fine, Okkotsu, if you don't mind I'll be walking my girlfriend back to the dorms."

The atmosphere got thicker.

"Yeah see you at the school I guess..."

With that Megumi had already started to lead you away with out letting you say goodbye. His hand slowly loosened its grip as he sighed.

"You knew that guy?" You said

"Yeah, he's got a thing for dead girls."

"W-WHAT?"

"Yuta okkotsu, a special grade. He's related to Gojo so we would rarely bump into eachother in the past.

"Special grade?!"

"Y/n what ever you do, don't go messing around with him okay."

You doubted that Yuta was actually a bad person, let alone one who would hurt you. But you couldnt help but listen to Megumi as you saw the jealousy getting to him.

"Okay Gumi, on one condition."

"What?"

" I can talk to him about my amazingly strong good-looking boyfriend." You giggled as you swore Megumi was breaking down inside, movments becoming stiffer and hesitant.

"Whatever"

THANK YOU FOR READING ♡

AUTHOURS NOTE: I'm working on a few fics rn (including the OP ones) but my inbox is nearly empty and my requests are open. Reblogs r welcomed and have a good whatever time.

[hermesmyplatonicbeloved]

This post [X] contains a pjo fan desperately wanting to believe that Percy/Annabeth isn't toxic.

A Percy/Annabeth shipper responded and honestly I don't agree with some of the stuff they said. They specifically mentioned percabeth antis a couple times and I felt I need to address a few things since they were missing the point about a lot of arguments I've made.

It's far more than just the nickname. That's literally just the tip of the iceberg. I don't know why so many people get caught up on the nickname when it's like. some of the least shit Annabeth has done to Percy that we take issue with. For me, anyway.

Also, like it would be one thing if Annabeth was just using the seaweed nickname as an insult at 12 years old like most children do and grew out of it later on as she matured, but that's not the case. Read Riordan, from Annabeth at college (an adult):

It's more of an indication to me of what Annabeth really thinks of Percy. She doesn't respect him. When he has achievements (ones in academia which he canonically has struggled with and felt shitty about), instead of being happy for him like a supportive friend/girlfriend would, she seethes in jealously and envy. She has to be better than him, because if he's stupid and she's less than him that means she's stupid too, and she can't have that as the daughter of the wisdom and strategy goddess.

This comes from the passage in HoH where Percy mumbles that Tartarus smells like Smelly Gabe and Annabeth laughs at him.

I agree, its fairly flimsy because as far as we've seen Percy has never confided with Annabeth that his first step father was a piece of shit that liked to threatened to beat him into unconsciousness. It's a very traumatic thing and that takes a certain level of trust to share. She could've straight up not known and missed all of Percy's signals that he wanted to confide in her about it then.

One thing that trips me up tho is that a lot of people like to excuse the laughter saying that Percy is using jokes to cope with the trauma - and while we've seen other characters do that we literally never see Percy joking about Gabe's trauma. He never talks about it, barely even thinks about it. So I would say it's incredibly unrealistic to say that he was making a joke prompting laughter as a coping strategy.

Yeahhhh that's the thing!! They never do talk. They never communicate about these super important issues!! If they did, then they could have a healthy relationship. But they don't! And that's the problem!!

You can say "you doubt" and "you believe" all day long and that's wonderful and present in fanfiction and your beliefs but it's not canon. And since they don't get this stuff out in the air, it makes the relationship unhealthy.

Yes. Percy enjoys being around Rachel, and the issue is that he directly contrasts that to Annabeth and his experiences with her come up lacking! Which is something that falls on both of them btw.

"They aren't trauma bonded... they spend time with each other outside of life threatening situations." / "They go on dates."

Yeah, Percy and Rachel did. Nice dates, that didn't involve killing or missions or quests.

Has Percy ever gone on a quest with Annabeth that didn't devolve to a mission or quest? Not that we've seen. There's nothing straight up mentioned in the text. They've been on outings together - ie. the failed movie hangout, the date in central part, etc. that start out fun but it always goes back to a quest or mission.

That's not Annabeth or Percy's fault to be clear (yes I'm repeating this twice) - but it does indicate that they cannot get away from that aspect of their lives and relax together. It's always war-fighting-gods with them, tarnishing the domestic moments. It's always hanging over their heads.

When you consider Percy's character (ie. his first words; "I never wanted to be a demigod," and his desire to have a normal life and be done with the quests, prophecies and missions it's not good. This is not Annabeth being abusive to re-iterate. Not her fault. It's more of a "we're not good together" because of external factors - Percy's not getting what he wants. On some level, he's not happy with the relationship.

Also, since we brought up that experience/convo with Rachel, there's something else I want to talk about. It's a lot less 'subjective.'

Percy's POV from TLO: "She [Rachel] was so much easier to be around than some other girls I knew. I didn't have to work hard, or watch what I said, or rack my brain trying to figure out what she was thinking."

I don't think we talk about this enough?? Like it's so telling about the nature of Percy/Annabeth's relationship. When they got together, Annabeth said, "I will never ever make things easy for you." And it's probably some of the truest things she's ever said.

In TTC instead of communicating with Percy and asking him to dance with her, she punches him. And a lot of people call Percy obvious in that situation, but they had just agreed to split up from Thalia and Grover. It's reasonable for him to be thinking that he would further split up from Annabeth to cover more ground and get closer to the demigods they were watching, instead of dancing together.

In HoH while they were in Tartarus, Annabeth intentionally brings up Rachel, and (from her POV) says that she likes to keep Percy, "on his toes." - House of Hades.

Meaning she likes to keep him on edge, guessing at what she's thinking and wondering if he's doing wrong etc. They're in the middle of Tartarus - you'd think that she'd give him a break there context considering but no. She adds to the mental toll he's going through after being kidnapped by Hera, brainwashed and being separated from his friends/family in close to a year on top of being in Tartarus and fighting a war where the existence of everything he loves hangs in the balance.

Idk if I'd classify this as abusive, but its definitely a massive red flag. You do not want to be in a relationship with someone who takes pleasure in giving you anxiety and 'on your toes.' That's definitely unhealthy.

This isn't the case. There are multiple instances of Percy fearing Annabeth outside of active battle from his narrative.

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?” Annabeth interrupted, shoving aside the other campers. I thought she was going to punch me." - Battle of the Labyrinth. Context: Annabeth was very upset/worried about Percy, and he assumed abuse from Annabeth.

“Shut up, Silena. Hand me your dagger.” / I was afraid Annabeth was going to stab me with it. - Bronze Dragon. Context: Percy complimented another girl in front of Annabeth, and then assumed abuse from Annabeth.

He repeatedly expects to be hurt by her - in absurd situations! Like its not reasonable to hurt a friend/significant other in these contexts!! That's a strong red flag, and an indication of an abusive relationship. You have to ask yourself why does he think this way? Why does he think Annabeth's going to hurt him? Has she done that before?

Yes, she has. She has stuck him many times in situations where she has no right to do so:

"Um, who should I ask?" / She punched me in the gut. "Me, Seaweed Brain." - Titan's Curse. Context: Percy doesn't read her mind and doesn't know what she wants, so she hits him before telling him to dance with her.

"Annabeth alternately shouted, gagged, hit me, called me names like “Idiot! Stupid—dirty—moron—” and topped it all off with “Kill you!" - Staff of Hermes. Context: Percy saved himself and Annabeth from being killed, by travelling up sewer water. Annabeth gets livid and hits him multiple times.

"Annabeth grabbed his wrist and flipped him over her shoulder. He slammed into the stone pavement [...] Annabeth put her knee on Percy’s chest. She pushed her forearm against his throat." - Mark of Athena. Context: similar to botl case above, Annabeth was extremely worried about Percy and takes her emotions, her bitterness out on him physically.

"'You did an awesome job.' [Jason, to Percy]. / 'Back at you,' Percy said. / Annabeth kicked his shin." - Mark of Athena. Context: Annabeth kicks Percy while he's bonding with Jason to tell Percy to shut up so they can talk about the great prophecy.

None of those situations warrant striking Percy, but it does prove why Percy fears Annabeth. His fears aren't unfounded - they're built upon actual things Annabeth has done to him.

And if that's still not enough evidence for you, Annabeth has a tendency to place Percy in danger by using him as bait without letting him know the plan, literally shoving him head first into danger, etc.

The lightning thief, Annabeth uses Percy as bait to distract Clarisse + Ares warriors so Luke can get the flag. She doesn't tell Percy that he's being set up, nor does she give him any back up - which you'd think would be important considering that Percy had no experience holding a sword and shield. Reminder: Percy got electrocuted. He thought he would die.

Chalice of the gods, Annabeth shoves Percy off a cliff without warning. Percy gets his ass kicked by the river god, getting a bleeding head wound. (Do I need to remind you how bad head wounds are?) Meanwhile Annabeth sits on the side in safety tapping her wrist impatiently.

I elaborate about it more here. Yeah, I can see why he's scared of her. She puts him in danger with her plans without communicating anything to him. And he gets hurt.

And if that's still not enough, Annabeth has literally said, "I only attack my boyfriend like that." (Edit: - Mark of Athena). Can't remember where its from because it's from a short story someone quoted on tumblr to make an argument. You only attack your boyfriend? Domestic violence right there. Or a really shitty joke that's not really a joke because its a habit that she follows through with repeatedly.

So yeah. Even if you ignore the last point because I don't have the source, there is overwhelming evidence that Annabeth is abusive and Percy canonically fears her. This is not healthy relationship, and the flaws are not acceptable minor grievances you can dismiss by saying that they're just teens learning to be people.

The things Annabeth do are intentional. It starts in tlt, and she doesn't learn or grow out of it by cotg and beyond when she's an adult/ She doesn't have the reason/excuse of being a child anymore. The relationship is toxic and they shouldn't be together.

[mysticsublimeperson]

I've been hunted by one little all consuming idea.

Basically I want the knights exposed to BAMF spy! Merlin, I was thinking something like this..

The knights are spying on someone on enemy territory. They are following this person across the border and being seen there could cause a war, but the thing they need from this person is very time sensitive, so they go, surprisingly without any major trouble; mostly because Merlin's been assuring a safe passage n the dark.

The thing is this person finds an inn, and they can't be sure of they're way because in a inn you can ask for a ride, or trade the very thing they are after, they are unsure that this person knows it's value so...

"It'll be easy..." Arthur assured while taking of his gauntlet "We'll take off the armor and pass for merchants or something" explained as he indicated Merlin to take of the rest of armor.

Merlin couldn't contain the snort that escaped him.

All of them looked at him.

"Sorry, sorry..."

"You have something to say Merlin?"

"It's just... I mean not offense sires, but you are way too posh for that to work, even your normal clothes is way to fine, not matter how much dirt you cover yourself with" explained takin another part of the armor.

"Aren't you forgetting something Merlin?" said Elyan amused.

"Yeah.. alright, not all of you come from nobility, but... well, let's say that he perks of being a knight change people enough" he tried not to be offensive, but the fact is that after being trained as knight all of them had a change in demeanor, the walked differently, they looked at the people with a superiority that only power gave. Even if it's the power to do good and protect, they had that kind of authority. "Believe me, if you walk in there and claim to be anything other than a knight, we'll be discovered, people in this kinds of places know how to detect threats" He explained helping Elyan after loosening Lancelot's armor.

"Then what do you suggest?" Asked Leon softly.

"Maybe we can twist a bit the truth... Gwaine is already a drunkard" Gwaine laughed at that "And all of you can be yourself, before being a knight, just not together" thought outloud, he could hear some agreement "And Arthur and Leon could be knights on a quest, just not say that you are Camelot's knights" offered looking at Leon.

They spoke about the details of their background stories and arranged their accommodation. They would enter at different times, and from different paths. Most of them could fake no having any kind of relationship with each other, but some, Merlin knew, would not be able, so they planned around it. In the end they would take four rooms, one for Leon and Arthur, one for Percival and Lancelot, one for Elyan, and one for Gwaine.

"And what about you?" Lancelot asked worried.

"It doesn't make sense for me to have enough coin for a room" he said like it was obvious. But he could see the surprise in every face surrounding him.

"You'll come with us then" othered Arthur.

"That won't make sense with the story..."

"Us then.." said Percival, surprising Merlin, before he could deny.

"No, I won't work, come with me Merlin" offered Elyan.

"Don't be ridiculous, Merlin is my best friend, he surely can come with me without arising suspicions" laughed Gwaine.

Merlin was a bit chocked up with surprise, he hoped his face wasn't too red, but he couldn't help it. It was rare that the knights showed this kind of affection towards him.

"Thank you for the offers" he said sincerely "but I think you are not understanding, all of you will be interpreted as thread, maybe Gwaine could pass but he won't be discreet, all of you attract a terrible amount of attention and someone who is trying to smuggle something won't want that... just trust me" even this he could see protest in their eyes they agreed.

Merlin entered last, all of them already had been accommodated at the inn. Once alone, he could let loose, the rain was just a nice touch.

He entered the inn drenched, and purposely tripped at the entrance. He approached the owner and begged for a simple job to pay the stay, he looked at him and offered a cot under the stairs for serving the tables.

Now he had the attention, everyone knew him as a bumbling idiot, desperate for cain and roof, most of them view Merlin as an easy target, and that was the point.

He served awkwardly and tripped a bit more, the owner threatened to make him sleep with the horses but that secured his image.

"Are you ok?" Lancelot asked when Merlin brought his drink, if it was another Merlin would be in risk of being discovered. "You're still wet"

"It's fine, it's not different from the usual" that turned his expression into a frown.

"Surely that..."

"BOY!" called the owner.

"Yeah! Coming"

The person the comes to the room and sits themselves in a far table, Merlin knows that they are aware of him so he put his plan. He crashes softy, almost making a mess, and thanks them profoundly, he picks up something valuable looking from the floor and give it back, earning the look of someone too naive, and the he blushes ashamed when they comment on his situation. He spills some bullshit on how his master left him on the road for packing the wrong coat, making himself pitiful. Then he would sputter an apology for speaking out of turn, and would go. Now that the bait was set it was just a matter of time.

Usually this kinds of people would try to smuggle shit using someone else, so if they get caught, they'll just put the blame in the other person. It was smuggler 101.

He was kind of losing hope until a bully on a table he purposely took the other wrong decided that Merlin was good enough punching bag. The punch to the gut let him without air for a full minute, he felt himself gaping like a fish out of the water. He had prepared himself for the punch, but had to make it believable, now he looked weak, which solidified the character. He could hear voices, but he was a bit unfocused.

"Hey, friend, are you ok?" it took everything in him not to smile victorious, it worked.

Basically this person invites Merlin to their room and tries to convince Merlin to travel with them. And at dawn they go, Merlin, with some help from the magic, gets them confused enough to turn back to the borders where the knights are waiting and arrest them properly.

Then they are all terribly silent, because there's so much to unpack here.

[rocknroll7575]

When Team ARCZ try to think where they want to spend their breaks at together, they can't decide which of the four main places it can be. May picks Vacuo and Reese picks Mistral since that is where they are from. Cardin picks Atlas since that is where Neon is from. And Jaune wants Vale since he wants to explore this city more.

Of course May can easily convince Jaune using his one disadvantage... his hormones. All she needs to do is talk about how the hot temperature will make her have to wear more revealing stuff and make her sweaty, and he will be putty in her hands.

Reese: Come on guys I've got family in Mistral! We should go there!

Cardin: What about Atlas? I mean shouldn't we be in a snowy place for winter break? Besides, It's been a while since I've visited my girlfriend.

May: How about instead of freezing our buts off, we go to Vacuo? It's warm!

Reese: What about you Jaune?

Jaune: I'll be honest, I don't know...

Reese: Aw! Come on Jdawg! decided!

May: Jaune, trust me, let's go to Vacuo, everywhere else is gonna be cold! We go to Vacuo we're gonna be nice and warm *gains a sinister smile* So hot in fact, I'll have to be wearing a bikini top pretty much everywhere!

Jaune: *imagining it* R-Really?

May: *nods* Yeah, and now that I think about it, I'd have to walk around pretty much half-naked!

Jaune: *Gulps and is sweating as he blushes* Is... is that so...?

May: Oh yeah, can you imagine it~? Me, hot and sweaty, walking around in a small bikini, and getting nice and cool at the beach, getting all wet~?

Jaune: VACUO IT IS!

Cardin: *Over scroll* Hey babe, would you wanna come to Vacuo for winter break!?

Reese: *Picturing Jaune shirtless at the beach* Already packing my swimsuit!

May: HELL YEAH!!! *Jumps for joy, feeling great*

Thus began Guardian Ghost AU's Beach Episode!

[zzoupz]

what does lesboy mean for you? I'm curious, as I've never seen someone who uses the label

I have many reasons for using it!

firstly in thai queer culture transmasculinity and lesbianism has always been intertwined, so much so that the word for butch lesbian/trans man is the same word. I grew up seeing myself as a butch. I only learned of other identities in english when I started to use the more western side of the internet. so I feel like that butch boy is still a part of me

second reason, while this can be dysphoric to some I just don't Mind being perceived as a lesbian. I'm a pre-op trans boy who don't really plan on doing more than T so I already know that I'm gonna look like a masculine lesbian to most people. and like I said, I don't necessarily feel bad about that! lesbians are awesome

third reason, I feel like calling my attraction/relationship with women straight kinda.. take away the queerness of it. related to the second reason, I already don't look like a man. if I had a girlfriend we wouldn't look like a straight couple. I still have to hide my attraction like other queer sexualities. hell I still go by Miss in my ID card. so yeah

sorry if that's a long answer and doesn't really make sense. though remember that my experience is far from universal even for lesboys, there are many reasons someone might use the label :3

TL;DR: my attraction to women is too queer to be straight

[ashsimpsalot]

Mera naam... (Monkey man Kid X Reader)

A/n: uhhhh idk if I like it as much as coconut & honey but enjoy!

'you should never lie'

his mother once told him with angry eyes that he hated to see so much. When Kid was just 8 years old, he had lied to his poor mother about going to play near the river just in front of their humble home, instead, going off far away into the market because he wanted to buy the bangle she's been eyeing for a while.

He's been a proper good boy, he swore, he helped Mr Deepesh, their next door neighbour, by cleaning up his chicken coop for money. He didn't mean to worry her.

'You shouldn't lie to the people you love, even when you think it's for a good reason, a lie is a lie,' she had worriedly say while hugging her boy to her chest.

He didn't think those words would haunt him 20 years later. Kid didn't even mean to lie to you, he didn't even mean to fall for you, but he had, and his lies only bury him into a deeper hole.

"Bobby? You're ready to go?" your sweet voice snapped him out of his thoughts, the beer he's been nursing while you pack up the kitchen still in his hand.

"yeah," he nods, giving you a small smile. You wrapped your hands around his arm so easily as if you've been doing it for years, in reality it's only been 4 months.

4 months of lies

4 months of love

His mind wandered back to how he got here, with your hands wrapped around his arm, heading for your motorcycle. Was it that night? When he first entered his shift, he noticed you eyeing him. He didn't think much of it, you were a chef after all. You could've just been curious about the new staff.

Was it when he keeps staring at you too? Unintentionally?

But it's definitely when you start smiling at him. He's never had any other thought than revenge then this.. You... You happened.

"hey handsome, where's your mind travelling to?" you asked so sweetly he didn't even mind. Kid didn't know much about himself but he knew he hated when anyone else interrupt his thought process, not you though, never you.

Kid smiled and shook his head. "nowhere, right here," he covered it up with a quick peck on your lips and took your helmet from you, placing it onto your head and pinning it on for you, then with a stupid smile on his face he lifted the visor to boop your nose. You chuckled.

Fuck, is this love? This overwhelming feeling over the slightest thing you do?

He put on his own helmet and got on the bike, waiting till you get on too. His waist never felt so empty until you wrapped your arms around them.

4 months ago he didn't even have his own room, now he's heading to "our store" getting off the bike and ordering "the usual" and going straight to "our spot"

He doesn't even know who he is anymore.

Your kiss on his lips brought him back to reality.

"congrats, baby, on making it to VIP floor." you said with a smile on your lips.

If only you knew why he wanted to be on VIP floor so bad.

"thank you, jaan," he whispered softly, arms around your waist, swaying left to right lightly as if dancing to a song. He leaned down and kissed you again. "what's this? What's wrong?" damn you, you always somehow knew, your finger tracing his eyebrows as if to pull the frown out of his face.

He didn't know what to say. Tell you what? He's not at all who you think he is? He's plotting to kill a man? Burn the hotel? Kill one of the most influential fucking man in India?

"hey, you can tell me, Bobby, I'm here," you called that name so lovingly he had to physically fight from flinching.

In a perfect world where he isn't such a coward he'll open his mouth and tell you the truth but the truth is he's just that, a coward.

"i swear it's nothing, jaanu, just... Tired," he smiled and hugged you burying his nose in your neck, scared that he'll forget what you smell like once you find out who he is.

Your fingers snaked into his curls, playing with them like always, like it's yours, like he's yours.

"I've got you, always," you whispered into his ear, planting a soft kiss after.

He hope you meant that

Because after almost 2 months of disappearing, hiding from the police in the temple with the hijras, he's back, at your house, knocking.

You opened the door, you looked great but your eyes looks almost dead, somber.

"jaanu," that's all he could whisper, seeing you again is...

You tried to close the door but his reflexes made him able to hold the door open.

"please, please just let me explain myself"

You looked at him and scoff. "explain what? I don't even know who you are, what could you possibly say to me? What was your plan? Kill Rana and pin it on me or something? Is that it?" your voice gets shakier and shakier by each sentence, your grip on the door loosen. Kid quickly shook his head.

"no, no, never, jaanu," he had wrapped his arms around your crying figure, his body is half through the door, cupping your cheek and tenderly caressed your tears away.

"I trusted you! I loved you!" you cried out and all he could do was hold onto you while you smack your fists on his chest again and again.

"I know, i know," he whispered, he lead you inside as you limped against him.

On the couch he held you, tighter than usual, he lets you cry onto his chest, not caring about the condition of his shirt.

"you didn't call, you didn't explain, you just vanished, I thought you fucking died!" you cried out.

"I know jaan, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" thats all he can offer. He kept whispering apologies and sweet nothings into your ear until you end up falling asleep on his chest. He laid you down on the couch, planted a soft kiss on your forehead and went to the kitchen. Skillfully manoeuvring through your kitchen, making a meal as he's been there countless of time. He didn't keep track of time, only glancing at the clock when he hears a croak of your voice calling his 'name'.

"I'm here jaan," Kid said walking towards the couch to see your eyes teared again.

"I thought you left again," you said with a whine in your voice, he sat next to you, arm pulling your towards him to kiss your head. "I'm here," he repeated.

"I went to make you some food, it's pretty early I don't think you've eaten," he explained, you simply nodded.

"I... I want you to explain to me who you are and what's happening." you said voice beyond tired.

"my name isn't Bobby,"

"yeah no shit," you scoffed, he only nodded, he's glad really, you're letting him hold you, touch you that's a good sign, right?

" my name... Is Kid. I worked at Queenie's hotel because I'm... Plotting revenge on Rana and Baba shakti. For killing my mother." his voice grew quieter and quieter. The obvious pain in his voice when he mentioned his mother.

"my hands," you looked at those hands, his scarred hands he meant, the ones you would plant kisses on after a night of passion, the ones you loved so much. "they got hurt when I tried to put out the fire my mother was set on... By Rana Singh," he said, face grew harder, voice turned colder.

You stared into his eyes. "Kid," you tried calling his name. He looked at you, all attention on you as if nothing else matters.

"I swear I didn't mean to rope you into this. I didn't mean to hurt you, I couldn't... I couldn't stay away from you, I tried. You consume me, my thoughts, I've never thought of anything else but revenge all my life and you walked into it and make me feel alive again. As if I could have any other life than just death after revenge. I never wanted to live but when I hold you I feel this fear of death that I've never felt before. Understand that all was real, my feelings for you was real, is real," he begged, his hands on your cheeks again.

"but you tried to kill him anyway, why?"

He shook his head. "when I saw him. When I saw that bastard I lost it. Why does he get to live his life while my mother is ashes somewhere on the forest floor?" he grunted, face angered.

You do what you always does, your finger start tracing his eyebrows, his face visibly soften. Like he could breathe again. He took your other hand and kissed it, leaning into your touch. He had been craving you, and you knew. "you're going after him again aren't you?"

"yeah" was all he could breathe out.

You sighed but you understood. The rage he has, it's all he knows.

"will you come back?"

His face lighten. "you want me to?" he asks, hopeful.

"always, always come back to me."

"but I'll be a fugitive by then," he said worried, he's not sure worried that you'll change your mind or that you'll be a fugitive too if you chose to follow him.

You shook your head. "I don't care, come back, we'll run together, I rather not live without you by my side. But Kid.."

"hm?" he asked, looking at you intently with your hands on his. "don't lie to me ever again. Ever." you warned.

He nodded his head and pulled you into him. "never, jaanu." he kissed you deeply, deeper than he ever did that day, lead your body the way he missed. He devoured you full that day, passion spilling into physical touches. He need you to understand his love. He needs you to scream his name. His real name.

[these-posts-arent-real]

(masterpost link)

Aaand we have returned to the madness on a larger scale! What are these cats up to...

#sighh #i know i've been away from dash sim posting for a while #was dealing with my last few days of school #but #that is Over Now #i can return to fulfilling everyone's need for Warrior Cats But Tumblr

57 notes

🐦 s3afow1s--sc0wl Follow

PLEASE stop talking about the most recent TTDV slates without spoilers, it hasn't made its rounds to ShadowClan yet and I don't want to know what's going to happen before I read it!!!!

#ttdv discussion #ttdv:rp #through the desert vast #ttdv: rattlesnake path #ttdv #through the desert vast: rattlesnake path #especially since i heard the newest slates have seafowl in them a lot #he's my specialest guy...

9 notes

🔁 🛤 carnation-stem-02 reblogged

🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow

I think the worst thing about no longer being a Clan cat is that a lot of the time I have no idea what y'all over there are talking about. What is TTDV?

🦁 lionsight-x3 Follow

TTDV stands for Through the Desert Vast. It's a new slate series everyone's going bee-brained over... I haven't read it yet because I prefer for a series to be finished before reading, but I've heard good things. Queer rep within the first couple chapters of the first slate-set, a non-traditional setting and cast (a rogue group living in the desert), and complex characters... needless to say I'm excited for when it finishes and I can read it!

#it's been on my to-read list for a while #maybe this is a sign #it seems pretty cool #ttdv

2,070 notes

🔁 🐦 s3afow1s--sc0wl reblogged

⛰️ fc-rockpaint Follow

In honor of Through the Desert Vast becoming popular, I've decided to make a rock-dye project on all of the main characters. Today's character is... Seafowl!

Unfortunately I don't have the right paints to portray him accurately (I haven't been able to find any white herbs for his patches, but I'm still on the lookout!) but this is mostly accurate to how he is described in the slates.

🌠 nightshade-tast3s-yummy Follow

Pssst... @s3afow1s--sc0wl

#eeeek! seafowl! #i looove him so much... my precious boy... #art #ttdv #ttdv seafowl #thanks for the tag!

162 notes

🔁 🌻 l1llyst3m reblogged

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

Aahhhh I've finally gotten into TTDV and... NOBODY was gonna tellme that one of the characters is heavily implied to be transfem? Nobody thought I'd find this interesting????

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

SCRATCH THAT. IT'S CANON. PIT VIPER IS CANONICALLY TRANS.

🐚 hermitcrabfriend Follow

I had wondered if you were talking about Pit Viper when I saw this post a cople days ago! Apparently so ^w^ yeah, it's canon, gets confirmed in the second slate set.

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

This makes me wonder. Why is everyone on this site talking about Seafowl saying he gives "egg vibes" when we have. An actual confirmed trans character. Right here.

Nothing against Seafowl but the only vibe he gives off to me is traumatized.

🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow

He's your typical prettyboy cishet protagonist type and everyone is pissed off that he's a side character rather than ttdv's ✨️specialest boy✨️. So they're trying to make him special by claiming he gives off trans vibes when he clearly does not and is happy as a tom.

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

#wait till op reads rattlesnake path

What do you mean by that-

#what do you MEAN by that— #im gonna need context #is this /pos or /neg #does something bad happen in rattlesnake path?? #help someone pls #through the desert vast #ttdv

103 notes

🔁 🥬 rxttencatmint reblogged

🥬 rxttencatmint

Im so fucking irritated... my mom wont let me read TTDV because it's "inApPrOpRiAtE." Which. Of course. Is because it has lgbtqia+ characters.

🥬 rxttencatmint

WONDEDFUL NEWS. MY MENTOR LET ME BORROW HIS COPY OF THE FIRST SET. AHHHHH!!!!! I GET TO READ IT!!

#YIPPEEEEE #òwó im so exCITED!!! #ive been wanting to read ttdv for a whileee #i love my mentor sm

5 notes

🪵 i-eat-moss Follow

My unpopular opinion (TTDV:RP SPOILERS INCOMING)

Keep reading

#ttdv:rp #ttdv #rattlesnake path spoilers #ttdv spoilers #ttdv:rp spoilers #nothing against pit viper!!! #i like her as a character #i just dont get why we got a whole book explaining her backstory

203 notes

🐚 hermitcrabfriend Follow

I LOOOOVE RATTLESNAKE PATH SO MUCH. IVE JUST GOTTEN TO READ IT AND IM SO EXCITED. OMG.

Not only is it a whole set dedicated to my favorite character !!! like a dream come true!!! It ALSO contains good intersex rep (Ball Python my beloved!!!). Over all just a FANTASTIC set in a fantastic series.

12 notes

🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow

I'm... back?? I'M BACK ON CLANBLR!!!! WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO

#i thought i'd never get back #stuck on Tumblr...

0 notes

🍽 the-post-maker

I hope y'all enjoyed this insight into what the cats do when they get fandom-y... and if you want to discuss TtDV further... well, there's a server for that ;) now back to your regular dash

[elianaroselight]

So I have fallen into the CotL world and came across an awesome AU called the Heartstring AU by @bleeding-seraphic. I loved this post about Leshy meeting his soulmate (again) and had to write about it.

TW : talks of sacrificing another and mentions of genocide

How did he end up in this predicament? This was the thought running through Leshy's mind as he listened to the lamb that had somehow managed to make him mortal. “-welcome to your new forever home, you genocidal freak.” Ah. Still was quite the spitfire it seems. Even after all these years. “If you need anything, man up and deal with it on your own. Oh. And if you try anything, I'll break both your knees and sacrifice you to your brother. Bye now!” Well, that was quite the whiplash of a threat. 

Leshy listens to the sound of feet walking away, used to his dark world forcing him to rely on sound to orient and understand his surroundings. The worm sighs when the coast is clear, reaching down to scratch an itch on his pinky. ‘Damned beast.’ He thinks before being startled by the feeling of something on his finger. He feels it quietly. It was.. A thread? A string of some sort. Thin but strong. Almost like spider silk. It didn't seem to be touching the ground, meaning it was floating or tied to something else. Now he was curious. Where did this strange thread lead to?

He loosely holds it, following where the string directed him to go. A few times, he had to walk around a building or even past some plants. (He was especially careful around those.) As he walked, he could hear someone working in the dirt before standing up. He seemed to be nearing this person and planned to walk right on by, until he realized the string he was following wasn't going around them. It was leading him to them. He feels his hand touch theirs and feels a gaze upon his face. The gentle sparks and warmth he felt where they touched was oddly welcoming if confusing. 

They sat in silence for a moment before the other screamed, startling the god. Leshy flinched back, trying to figure out why they were yelling but before they could do anything, the sound of hurried footsteps caught his attention and he stepped back a bit more. “Okay. Okay. What is going on?” The lamb calls out to them. Before Leshy could speak, the other begins to yell at the lamb. “WHY IS THE GOD OF DARKWOOD HERE?!” He's been recognized? 

“You must have recognized him wrong, Mel. He is but a rescue from Darkwood.” They say as the lamb tried to calm the other. So Mel is the name of the one his string is tied to? Leshy quickly makes note of that information as he listens on. “My lamb, I think I'd recognize the god who tried to sacrifice me! And even if I didn't, our strings were the same the first time we met and-and they still are!” A sacrifice? There was only one sacrifice that had managed to get away from him. A silent yellow cat who had been set free after he was creeped out. So this ‘Mel’ was the yellow cat he set free? Huh. 

The annoying sheep pauses for a moment before speaking with a bit of an uncertain tone. “Are you sure your strings are attached?” “Yes! I've known since I saw it connect while I was at his altar to be sacrificed!” “I see. Well, he won't be able to harm anyone here so I'm giving him another chance. Why don't you take the rest of the day off, Mel. We can talk this over more when things settle down again.” 

Leshy hears the cat near him sigh. “Yeah okay.” They say before walking off. Leshy can feel the glare from the lamb on him, but ignores it to process this information. So this string was attached to Mel, a yellow cat he had set free a while back. The only thing left to answer was: what is this string and why is it attaching them? 

[mysticmellowlove]

can we get another yandere chat / yandere streamer please I really wanna know where the three people went

note; omg i'm fucking alive holy shit. i'm in exam period right now and i swear the universe is trying to take me out. shit's rough out here lol. I've been rattling the bars of my enclosure waiting to get out and write some more. missed you guys, cute lil friends xxx

warnings; yan chat is back, yan streamer, reader 'sugar', yandere tendencies, gang violence, they mean frfr,

word count; 1123

After logging off for the day and raiding one of his friends Streamer found himself checking on his discord, in particular the chat he had going on with three of his long-time fans, affectionately titled his three musketeers to respect their anonymity. The ones that had been with him since the beginning when he had no viewers and a silly dream of becoming a popular creator.

To think that he had that in his foreseeable future, it was intoxicating. Fans, money and most of all influence. Of course, he couldn't forget about his lovely mod as well.

His eyes scanned over the private chat with a satisfied grin on his face, they had found him. For a while now there was one particular chatter that was getting on his nerves. No matter how much Sugar banned them they always seemed to find a way back. He had been trying to appeal to Sugar for weeks now, always mentioning them and gifting various rewards that were specifically aimed towards the beloved mod.

Streamer knew things sometimes got a little parasocial when it came to internet personalities. Still, something about this creep trying desperately to get close to Sugar had his blood boiling as if he was using the chat as an e-dating server. He wasn't the only one either, it seemed.

A call button appeared on his screen for a moment before he adjusted his settings and answered it, the people chatting on the other side becoming more and more apparent.

"The man of the hour." One of them jovially said, a playful lilt to her voice. Porthos always seemed to be the one ready to talk, with perhaps a little too much energy to seem natural. It seemed her words had set in motion the other two greeting him, one with their ever-present modulated voice covering their identity and the other sounding like he'd just finished smoking a pack of cigarettes.

"Hey you, I see some interesting things in the chat." He hummed as he took a sip of the coke he had next to him, waiting for the three to fill him in.

"Yeah, we tracked down the guy in the chat that was bothering Sugar, it was laughably easy." Porthos mused, the low hum of who knows what buzzing in the background.

"He had his details all out in the open, turns out using multiple emails all leading to the same IP is a dead giveaway." She said before a sniffle interrupted her.

"Don't take all the credit, it was only because I have access to the city records that we even found him," Athos noted.

"Technically I did most of the work." The final of the three, the one who hid behind the voice changer, Aramis chimed in. The other two seemed to stop talking as soon as they spoke up, for good reason as well. There was something different about Aramis, but their knowledge was gladly welcomed.

"I assume you're all waiting for the finale?" They monotonously droned as the sounds of clicking came from their mic. Not long after a window popped up, fileshare. Without needing to do anything the file opened to a video and began to play.

The camera work was jittery but it was obvious what was in the middle of the screen. On the ground, legs and arms bound, was a middle-aged man wriggling. There was a group of men surrounding him, masked and dressed entirely in black with a badly stitched logo on their jackets.

No sounds came from the men as they drew ominously closer, that's when things really picked up. Their feet began to slam into the sides of the bound man, muffled screams coming from his gagged mouth as he tried desperately to wriggle away. Hands ripped at his clothing, showcasing the darkened bruises on his skin as the men continued their assault. The video tracked for about twenty minutes, all of it consisted of the men beating the shit out of the man on the ground. Screams turned to groans turned to whimpers as a mixture of piss, tears and blood mixed on the ground he was on.

His body seemed to turn entirely blotched with bruises as the video went on and on before no more sounds appeared to leave the man. Then the footage cut.

The silence seemed to wane on for a moment before Athos spoke up.

"That's some dark web shit or something." The only response he seemed to get was a clipped laugh from Aramis.

"I like supporting local businesses." It was no secret that Aramis was the only one of them who dared to play around on the darker side of the internet but damn were they good at it. Who knew what they got up to after hours, but it wasn't hard to tell that he had hired someone to beat the shit out of the creep.

"He's gone, probably being sold right now, well that parts of him that made it out unscathed. Don't worry, these guys are newbies but the group they're part of don't play around." A low whistle left his mouth as he listened to Aramis ramble about the exploit.

"You're a freak for real." Porthos laughed, seemingly having gathered herself, "Now that's dealt with I think we should get something in exchange, don't you?"

He rolled his eyes as he scanned the now blank screen.

"I'll organise something." He began before he was cut off rudely.

"Not something, we know you know where they are so why don't you get us all a little gift." Athos drawled. A harried sigh left his mouth as he tugged at the strands of his hair. The three of them were his fans, their support over the years had helped grow his platform greatly and they did fund most of his activities but... that also meant he had to keep them pleased.

Athos eluded that he was a well-known figure in the city, Aramis had ties to the black market and Porthos seemed to have no boundaries... they could very well take him down if they wanted to.

"Sure, I'll pick something up." He finally managed to get out, his voice obviously strained. All that greeted him was a chorus of laughter as the call ended. He stared at the screen for a moment more, thinking about the logistics of breaking into Sugar's apartment before a notification came through.

'Good boy' With a scoff he closed the application and got off his chair, annoyance swelling inside him. He was still closer to Sugar than them, he didn't have to panic yet.

[izufeels]

finding out bakugou katsuki’s secret ( wc 531 )

in the heart of bustling musutafu, y/n strolled through the crowded streets with a smile on her face, her mind filled with the day's events. little did she know, fate had a surprising encounter in store for her.

as she turned a corner, her gaze fell upon a familiar figure swinging gracefully through the air. it spider-man, musutafu's enigmatic hero, clad in his iconic red and blue suit.

y/n’s heart skipped a beat as she watched spider-man land gracefully on the rooftop of a nearby building. intrigued, she followed him, her curiosity overpowering her rational thoughts.

from her vantage point, y/n observed as the hero removed his mask, revealing the face of none other than katsuki bakugou, her childhood friend and current classmate.

her eyes widened in shock as she watched bakugou's expression shift from determined to vulnerable. he ran a hand through his disheveled hair, his features etched with exhaustion and determination.

y/n’s mind raced as she struggled to process the revelation. katsuki bakugou, the fiery and headstrong boy she had known for years, was also the masked hero who had been saving the city from danger.

lost in her thoughts, y/n failed to notice the slight movement behind her. suddenly, a hand grasped her shoulder, causing her to jump in surprise.

"y/n, what are you doing here?" bakugou’s voice cut through the air, filled with equal parts concern and confusion.

y/n turned to face him, her heart pounding in her chest. she hesitated for a moment, before saying, "i... u saw you. i saw you take off your mask."

bakugou’s eyes widened in realization as he took in her shocked expression. "you... you saw me?"

y/n nodded slowly, her mind still reeling from the revelation. "i can't believe it. you... you're spider-man."

“yeah,” bakugou sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping with relief. "yeah, i am. but, listen, you can't tell anyone, y/n. it’s something that needs to stay between us."

y/n nodded, her gaze softening with understanding. "i won't tell anyone, bakugou. i— i promise." she smiled softly at him.

a small smile tugged at the corners of bakugou's lips as he rubbed the back of his neck. "thanks, y/n.” he sighed. “i’ve wanted to tell someone for a while. i’m.. i’m glad it’s you.”

her smile grew even larger, her mind still swirling with questions. in a moment of weakness, she lost her politeness. "so, how long have you been doing this? uh, being spider-man, i mean."

bakugou leaned against the building, his gaze fixed on the bustling streets just a few yards away. "a few months now,” he hesitated before shaking his head. “it's... complicated. i couldn't just stand by and do nothing while people were in danger."

“wow,” y/n nodded, her admiration for Katsuki growing with each passing moment. “that’s amazing. truly, i mean— you’re amazing.”

bakugou’s cheeks flushed faintly at the praise, but he quickly composed himself. "yeah, well, don't go spreading that around. i've got a reputation to maintain."

y/n chuckled softly, the tension between them easing with each shared smile. "your secret's safe with me, spider-man."

[mezmer]

And before I say another word, I will always feel nothing but empathy for those who suffer chronic pain and I only wish I could make a difference and support these people because I know how much it means to them. Jjahaahaha why the fuck is it so hard for people to talk with me about scoliosis. Epilepsy they're all ears asking me questions. And women with Endo? LOOOVE to talk about their condition. Haa. And of course I genuinely, organically, love to listen to others talk about their chronic illnesses because I know how important it is, and I'm interested to hear their experiences. No hate on women with endometriosis. They just love to talk about it especially when people listen intently. It just hurts so bad how hard it is to get even my own family to give a single fuck beyond "I'm sorry wow changes subject immediately" or "yeah I knew a girl with that back in high school" shit blows my mind. I'm not selfish for wanting an ounce of attention paid to it because I've hardly ever gotten that. I connected to my friend with scoliosis who died of an overdose. Fleetingly, a five minute conversation that meant the entire world, I could cry. The face she made, while telling me what I already know, my truth per se she lived all the same and she lost the battle. God bless her soul and her daughter who lives on. Plus my spinal therapist, Isabella and Ravi, and that is it.

Haha I've known women with scoliosis who are so turned off by me trying to connect. John tells me, well maybe you shouldn't dwell on it. When the fuck do I? Yeah, right now on my tumblr. Irl I dont say a fucking word because nobody has ever cared.

Oh my God, so worth mentioning. When I was younger and naive, I had men find out about my spinal deformity and show so much concern right up to the point they'd say "would a back rub help?" Just to get me to expose my body and allow them to touch my bare skin. I was so fucking foolish. I was so young and so excited anyone cared. I just thought since I mostly spent my time with men, it would make sense they'd show concern. Well, turns out women don't offer teenage girls backrubs. So idiotic. I yearn for anyone to give a fuck. I don't understand why I get fucking interviewed about epilepsy but my spine (bane of my existence, actively ruins almost every aspect of my life, I never have flare-ups, my spine is constantly regressing and worsening. I wake up every morning in a deformed body that is collapsing in on itself. Lol) and I mean whatever. Like I said, I'm hardly asking anything. If things were 5% better. If my family just asked how it's going. I don't give a fuck about anyone helping me with the groceries, I just want somebody to care and it's been like this since my diagnosis. My own parents cut the conversation short every time. What is wrong with the way I speak?

[dynamightmite]

What are your thoughts on Izuku lately. Is he alright? I have read other people being unsatisfied with how he has been in this last arc about his relationship with All Might and Katsuki.

I got this ask a few days ago and I wanted to spend a little time thinking about it, because, well, there's a lot of moving parts to my opinions regarding Izuku/Katsuki/All Might and I needed to try an sort them out. This will still probably be kinda long and rambly, though, sorry lol.

To start with, I understand why a lot of people were frustrated by the jump from chapter 423 to 424, and a lot of it has to do with this chapter confirming that Shigaraki's dead, which, understandably, pissed off a lotta readers. It's also pretty jarring to go from THE CLIMAX to... a week later in a hospital. And for people who are not super attached to the Katuski-Izuku dynamic, the emotional, wholesome childhood friend scene is just not what they wanted to see anyway.

On the other hand, from a purely utilitarian perspective as a writer, I totally get why Horikoshi felt he needed to show the audience, that, hey guys! The main character is still alive, here's the state of his quirk! Because based on the reactions of some people, if we don't immediately see a character after they get wounded, they are super dead. No other option, time to riot! Like no offense to the everyone who's been panicking about the League, but Dabi is not dead. That man is a fucking COCKROACH, he's literally fine. And Toga just got, like, a little exsanguinated. That's nothin' in shounen terms.

HOWEVER, I do agree with some of the complaints about the overall timing. I think there maybe needed to be more of a buffer between this chapter and the last, to help pad out Izuku's reactions to just, y'know, kinda killing a guy. Possibly also showing other parts of the cast/story, although I don't necessarily know that jumping to, for example, focus on the League immediately after would have been the right move either. And, like I said, it's not especially weird for a narrative to jump from the end fight to pay attention to the main character. That is... such an inoffensive choice to make with the plot to the point that it's almost expected. But yeah, with a little more time to emotionally process before showing it, I think people would not be upset about the contents of this chapter nearly as much.

Because the scene with Katsuki and Izuku was like... super predictable. None of the things they said to each other were surprising or out of character, and this moment has been built up to for-fucking-ever. Katsuki, needy bastard that he is, running to yell and cry at Izuku about being rivals forever? Izuku wailing KACCHAN while also crying and insisting that he's fine etc, etc? I have no complaints about any of that in terms of content.

I have seen a few complaints about the Izuku-Katsuki dynamic stifling Katsuki's personal arc, which. I mean, I can't tell anybody how to feel, but I don't really feel like the criticisms I've personally seen were something to take seriously. Because Katsuki, singularly, was an inspiration. To his class (who lead the search for Izuku and brought the class together?), to the previous generation of heroes (All Might, Best Jeanist, FUCKING EDGESHOT???? WHO GAVE YEARS OFF HIS LIFE BECAUSE HE BELIEVED IN KATSUKI'S HEROISM AND SACRIFICE AND WAS INSPIRED BY HIM????), and to the general public (Horikoshi did put in those shots of all the random bg characters and characters we met from other arcs for a reason). He protected Izuku, he fought with him side-by-side, he acknowledged the help other characters gave him (Shoto and his ice ramp sob). His arc has followed the path that Horikoshi has been laying out for years and years. And it's fine if you don't like the arc that Horikoshi chose for him! But it is internally consistent. Even I have some superficial complaints about some of the specifics, but broad strokes? I'm quite happy.

In regards to Izuku and his personal arc... some of it's hard to comment on because the story's still not over. Like. IF my assumptions about the overall intentions behind Shigaraki's death are correct, the narrative will clarify as such through Izuku's actions and emotional state.

And, based on chapter 424, there's already some seeds of Shigaraki's death really affecting Izuku long-term.

Idk man, does this really look like Izuku isn't struggling with what's happened? That he is totally cool with Shigaraki dying? Do you really think he isn't conflicted at all?

Frankly, Izuku being conflicted is quite possibly the most normal, reasonable response for him to have. I've always loved the idea of future Izuku and Shigaraki reaching out and bonding after the war, so some of this is directed at myself, but... there's no real basis for the idea that Izuku has any extremely personal, loving connection to Shigaraki. It isn't like with Touya and Shoto, who have a wildly personal, intimate connection. The only times Izuku and Shigaraki interacted, Shigaraki was either actively attacking Izuku or threatening to kill him T_T it isn't weird that Izuku isn't especially fond of Shigaraki as a person. He kidnapped Kacchan! He tried to kill Izuku! He tried to kill basically everyone Izuku knows and loves! HE BLEW UP HALF OF JAPAN?! It is absolutely normal for Izuku to not, y'know, be especially fond of the guy as an individual.

But also... he did kill Shigaraki. The person he was so dedicated to saving, he was willing to give up his hands, his life. And yet, those were his hands that ultimately (with Shigaraki's spirit help) killed Shigaraki's body, even if it was being possessed by AFO at the time. And I don't think he wanted to kill Shigaraki. I don't think he wanted to kill anybody! And if I'm right, the epilogue arc is going to uphold that pain, and use it to fuel Izuku and his desire to change the future of society.

IF Horikoshi is going for Shigaraki as a martyr who died and it was a tragedy that we, the audience, are supposed to be heartbroken about, then I expect him to continue the story with the idea that, just like it's a tragedy that Shigaraki died, it is a goddamn tragedy that Izuku was put in a position where he had to choose between saving the life of someone he wanted to save and stopping AFO from killing everyone. He is sixteen years old! He shouldn't be making a choice like that, and it is a travesty that he was forced to! That he was the only person capable of making that choice. He is a kind, caring, scared kid who just killed somebody. I want him to feel betrayed, even if he doesn't quite know how to express it. I want him to grieve. I want him to actively work towards a tomorrow where nobody gets put in Shigaraki's position OR HIS ever again. Because it isn't fair! It isn't fair to him, to Shigaraki, or the readers that love them both! And I want Izuku to be hurt about it and I want the other characters to care.

Which leads me to All Might.

I have a lot of complicated feelings about All Might. Because I simultaneously DO think that the narrative has actually spent a lot of time seriously criticizing him directly, and also feel like it's hard to balance the fact that he is a good person/hero who tried his best but ultimately failed (and was deeply, personally influential for basically all of the major characters) with the fact that he is super wrong about a lot of things and probably didn't need the amount/type of screen time he got. Like, I got the vision behind the Iron Might suit thing and Izuku inspiring him to be a quirkless hero, but also I think it took away from other characters who needed acknowledgement more. The torch should have been passed, and All Might could have been brought in a different way.

If you're asking about just this chapter? Honestly, I find it hard to criticize All Might for being proud of and kind to his proteges for doing the thing he couldn't: defeating AFO and stopping the destruction of Japan. They're wounded to the point of potentially life-long disability and emotionally wrecked. There was exactly zero chance that Izuku was going to wake up in his hospital bed to All Might saying "wow, it took you that long to stop AFO and both him and Shigaraki are dead now? You really do suck, kid. I never should have given you my quirk".

In terms of framing, I do see some people's concern over the fact that All Might's words (and the surrounding imagery) seem to be positive and hopeful and could be read as him (and therefore the narrative) brushing off the horror of Shigaraki having to die for the rest of the world to know peace. All Might has always symbolized the Old Guard, and the outdated heroic ideals that caused the current tumult and state of society. So to have him say "good job, you did it!" does sound worryingly like the story saying that everything is good and right with the world now. Which... if we want to be thematically consistent, it isn't "all good".

But ultimately, a lot of this is in wait-and-see territory. Until the manga is over, I'm not ready to be married to any particular opinion about the end, because we just don't know for sure where Hori's gonna take this. And while I do genuinely think that we have enough to be excited/optimistic over, I'm also not blind to the potential disaster that the ending could make the story. So. We'll find out in the next few weeks/months!

Sorry for talking so much, lmao. Thanks for asking!