#but yeah... I'm real bad and I'm probably only going to get worse here

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 山河令/Word of Honor.

Word of Honor is a 2021 adaptation of a novel by priest that tells the story of two beautiful murderers, their three kids, and their collective attempts to ignore the fetchquest madness that has taken over the rest of the jianghu.

Look, you know what Word of Honor is. Doing a rec for this is like doing my rec for Nirvana in Fire -- I am not introducing you to a new concept. Even if you haven't watched it, you've probably osmosed enough through the rest of Tumblr to have an opinion on it. At this point, if you haven't seen Word of Honor, I'm assuming it's for one of two reasons: either you haven't gotten around to it yet, or you haven't been sufficiently moved by what you've seen fandom do with it.

So I'm going to give you five reasons to watch the show, and they're probably not going to be the reasons you've seen already. Not to say that the other reasons are bad, but you've heard them already, right? What I've got for you are five somewhat more unexpected reasons that may just convince the fence-sitters that this nut-flavored morass of toxic relationships is worth your time.

1. No matter how gay you think it is, it's gayer

Okay, sure, you've probably been given the impression that this show is real gay. But I don't know if you know how gay it is. This show is so gay that we still haven't seen many of the other BL-flavored shows filmed around the same time period or since, because Chinese censorship gay-panicked and locked them all away before they could air, because Word of Honor was just too gay.

Zhou Zishu and Wen Kexing (L-R above) are in love. The story does not make sense if they're not. There is no story if they're not. Everything else in the show is set dressing to this incredible adventure story of two horrible people who fall for one another.

Oh yeah, did I mention that they're both bad guys? One's a fascist toddler-murderer and the other's a cannibal mob boss. These two deserve one another, in every possible sense of that phrase. In any other property, they'd be the villains -- and even here, they're still kind of the villains! It's just that the heroes are worse.

What's more, their two actors absolutely understood the assignment. They got the memo. They read the book. No one ever had to sit them down midway through shooting and explain their dynamic. They had it from the table read. When given creative freedom, they chose to double down and make the gay shit even gayer.

But the actors weren't the only ones who knew what they were doing! Everybody working on the production was pretty much in full-on Let's Make A BL mode. There are no gay accidents here. It's so gay that it's actually gayer than the version that aired. If you can do a little lip-reading (though beware of spoilers in those links), you can get at the original filmed version, which had a number of lines that were too homo and/or sexual for Chinese television.

No, they don't kiss. They don't have to. This is the TV version of the tweet about, what's gayer, gay sex or whatever these two have going on? The answer is, whatever these two have going on.

It's so gay that they're not the only gays. No, I'm not going to tell you who the other gays are, in part because spoilers. But trust me, they're there. Lesbians too! And a bisexual elderly polycule! And one pair of hets that we love love love, and most other heterosexuals are creepy and gross. And if that's not an accurate representation of how the world looks to queer people, I don't know what to tell you.

2. Go nuts!

You are not prepared for the product placement.

Word of Honor started off having a budget, so they went ahead and started spending that budget in the way you do when you're making a TV show. Unfortunately, circumstances changed, and their budget became much less, which meant they couldn't keep making that TV show unless they got more dollars. But where to get a sponsor for a fairly low-profile wuxia BL property?

Enter our hero: Wolong Nuts.

I have seen actors do bumper ads in costume for products from their various sponsors, and I have seen actors do bumper ads in character for the same. But the feeling of seeing a modern product diegetically hawked mid-scene by ancient fantasy characters is like none other.

Something like 40% of Word of Honor's total budget came from this nut sponsorship. And here the thing: It worked! It sold nuts! Hell, I’d buy them if they were sold anywhere near me; I like nuts in general, and nuts that support the queers in particular.

I'm including this as a selling point because, come on, it's funny as hell. But it's also a good place to warn you that Word of Honor has what we're politely going to call a spotty use of its funds. Some things, like everyone's outfits and the score, are lavish and beautiful. Other things, like some of the sets and a lot of the CG, are janky and sad. Crowd scenes are thirty humans and a bunch of Blender assets. I've never seen so many fake plastic trees together in one place before. There's a lot of visible hairnets. Like, a lot.

The show was originally planned as being 45 episodes long. It wound up being 36 + a tiny epilogue. That's a huge cut! I’ll say to its credit that you mostly can’t feel the seams; the production team did a heroic job killing their darlings (in many senses) while keeping the narrative coherent. If you know about the original vision, though, you can identify pretty quickly where the excised material should have been. Don’t be surprised when the last two episodes in particular smack you like a hit-and-run.

They blew a truly unwise amount of the budget on costumes in general, and Wen Kexing's costumes in particular, and thank goodness. (@canary3d-obsessed has done a noble job of cataloging everyone's wardrobes, and some of the details are just stunning.) See that red outfit he's wearing there, with the elaborate, delicate embroidery? That apparently took two people literal months to hand-sew. It's a terrible use of limited funds, and I am living for it. Even when Wen Kexing looks awful, he looks stunning -- especially when you put him side by side with Zhou Zishu, who is wearing the jianghu equivalent of slutty yoga pants and a thrift-store dollar-bin t-shirt that says IT'S WINE O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE.

So if, while you’re watching, you’re ever disappointed by the quality of the production in front of you, just console yourself by thinking: That’s nut money, baby.

3. The ghosts (and everyone else) doing the mosts

This is a show that somehow managed to accumulate a tremendous supporting cast of actual grown-ass adults, then had the wisdom to make them play a wide variety of balls-to-the-wall bonkers roles.

You can't throw a rock in a crowd scene without hitting a dozen actors with resumes as long as their arms, who have been acting since before you were born. Apparently they poached a couple veteran film and stage actors from other contemporaneous productions and had them come over to film bit parts on their days off. If you see a character played by an older actor who's getting more lines and face time than you think their character strictly deserves relative to their importance to the plot, and you're like, hm, I wonder if this older actor has a career that includes roles in several dozen other shows and/or stage productions, the answer is yes.

I've seen the tone of the show described as melodramatic, but I don't think that's quite it -- it's more operatic. People speak to the middle distance and play to the back row. Several actors have the body language and line delivery that makes it seem like they're always about three words away from breaking into song. Several of my favorites are downright camp. It's magnificent.

Statistically, everyone in this show is a bad guy. There are the respectable people who don't mean to be bad guys, but wind up being bad guys anyway because they support bullshit systems. There are the morally grey folk who are willing to become bad guys because they think they'll be the good guys when all is said and done. And there are the bad guys who know they're bad guys and are going to chew every piece of scenery in the vicinity about it, so watch out.

My favorite collection of scene-stealing weirdos is probably the clutch of freaks that make up the ghosts of Ghost Valley. They're not actual ghosts -- this is not a supernatural show. They are instead living people who call themselves ghosts because they've found themselves on the margins of society for one reason or another, and have created their own little society! With hookers! And blackjack! And also a little murder, as a treat!

These ghosts are so extra that they actually have a Top Ten List, where all the ones that have code names and specific costumes hang out. How do you get on the Top Ten List? By killing one or more of the people already on it, of course! I told you these guys are villains! They're not even the only villains! They're not even the only villain organization! It's wall-to-wall bad guys around here! And oh my goodness, the actors are clearly having a ball with it.

When the screenwriter came to adapt Faraway Wanderers (the novel) into Word of Honor, she realized that there weren't a whole lot of ladies in the book -- so she invented/adapted some for the show and made most of them sinister! (In fact, if you watch Legend of Fei -- and you should watch Legend of Fei -- you can see a lot of the inspiration for said ladies.) Some of the female characters in the show were men in the book, while others weren't even in the book at all. They all feel organic, though, and not like someone was trying to get Strong Female Character Points. It's the good representation you get when there's a lot of representation, so nobody has to be The Girl, and all the girls can just be people.

...Alas that another casualty of the budget cuts is that several of the lady characters did not get to live up to their full ass-kicking potential. But that potential is still there! The badassery may be implicit instead of explicit, but you don't doubt that many of these women would eat your heart at the slightest provocation, and you would thank them while they were doing it.

This show is perfect food if you're the kind of viewer liable to get sucked up into the worlds of villains, NPCs, bit parts, optional side characters, and other narratives going on outside the main storyline. Because there's a lot going on outside the main storyline. I mean, that's kind of the running joke of the whole novel, that there's this whole complicated political plot happening, and yet our dudes are over here studiously trying to not know what the hell is going on. Obviously that's harder to preserve in a show, but it's still a key feature of the narrative. Most of the Big Power Play What-Not is always happening a few towns over from where the main party is at any given moment. I know people who've watched the drama several times and still can't explain whatever's happening with all that. That's fine. You roll with it for the sake of everything else.

So! Do you like gazing upon delightful character actors and having imagination adventures about the unexplored workings of a bunch of tantalizingly mysterious and often very sexy weirdos? Great! This will keep you busy for a good long while.

4. The juciest pining in the jianghu

I said I wasn't going to tell you about all the gay shit going on here, and I'm not. What I do want to cover, however, is how much gay shit isn't going on here -- and by that I mean just how much of the show's gay longing is unrequited. If you like it when the boy yearns for the other boy, friend, you will feast well tonight.

You have likely already, through fandom, been alerted to the existence of the biggest gremlin in the land and an understandable number of people's favorite character, immortal grandpa Ye Baiyi. What may not have been conveyed, however, is just how tragically gay this bitch is. The ultra-condensed, scrubbed-for-spoilers version of his backstory is that he was in love with a guy who got injured because of him, so he decided to stay and live on a mountain with that guy and the guy's wife and coparent their son with them, all the while never once telling the guy how he felt.

This is not me with slash goggles on. This is canon. Well, okay, the "in love with" part is only confirmed in the book, but Huang Youming, Ye Baiyi's equally gremlin-like actor, has also clearly done the reading and understands how to break your heart with it. Ugh, it's so good.

Shidifuckers, rejoice! Zhou Zishu has Han Ying, his devoted little dumpling who would -- and does -- do anything for him. Back in Zhou Zishu's regrettable (but very fashionable) fascist days, he had a bunch of little underlings; one of them was Han Ying, who still works for the same evil empire. Problem is, Han Ying isn't evil. He was never loyal to his job; he was always just loyal to Zhou Zishu. It's cute the way Wen Kexing hisses like a cat upon meeting Han Ying and immediately identifying him as a rival for Zhou Zishu's affections. If you like OTPs that occasionally roll in a service-top third, please consider that adorable muffin boy up there.

And speaking of quitting your job, have you ever had the problem where you had to orchestrate your own death to get away from your toxic boss who won't stop sexually harassing you, and that motherfucker still expects you to show up for your shift next weekend? Meet Prince Jin, who has refused to accept Zhou Zishu's resignation letter with extreme prejudice.

Zhou Zishu isn't even the only ex he's mad he drove off! But that's just a namedrop in the show; see my bonus selling point for instructions on how to get into that whole gay-ass story. [insert obligatory "Prince Jin is not Helian Yi" disclaimer here]

...Nope, uh-uh, we're not going to get into what's going on with Scorpy. Suffice it to say, this is one of those cases where the show can't outright call a thing gay (though uhhhh it sure can imply a lot of it!), but it can set up an unspoken Gay Bad Idea as a direct, textual parallel with a canon Straight Bad Idea and be like, see? see? Anyway, daddy's boy there has deliciously terrible taste. This is the one that'll have you screaming crying throwing up etc.

And then there's this handsome jackass, who isn't doing the pining, but is the unfortunately heterosexual object of the often confused and misdirected longings of his friends. About the first thing you know about Rong Xuan is that he died before the series begins, so you only see him in a few flashbacks. The precious few times you do, though, you're treated to scenes of him holding court among his besties (many of whom are the spectacularly cast younger versions of major older male characters) while they all wrestle with varying degrees of homo longing for his cocky dreamboat self. You ever wanted to fuck a straight guy so bad you got both him and his wife killed about it? Because somebody in this drama sure has!

I sense you think I'm making this all up, that I'm just a fujoshi looking at the world through rainbow-colored glasses and telling you about her favorite slash pairings. Friend, I am not. Okay, I am being a little cheeky about the last one, but I swear that everything else I have listed in this selling point is about as textual as the show could make it, if not outright straight (ha ha) from the books.

(I have a whole separate theory about how priest herself is a real-life queer, based on how basically everyone in her works is either queer-coded or a token straight who's on thin ice, but that's a subject for a completely different Tumblr post no one's ever going to read, so save us both the time and imagine I already wrote it.)

I cannot stress to you enough how much this show knew what it was doing with the queer stuff. I love how amazingly toxic so much of it is, too, because one of the big themes of the show is that secrets will destroy you and everyone you love. If you have gay longing in a society that forces you to hide that gay longing, yeah, you're going to be extra-vulnerable to making some shitty decisions because of it! You're either going to suffocate yourself by keeping silent, or you're going to open yourself to intimate partner abuse you can't reveal to anyone else, or you're going to do some murders about it! Or some combination of the three! Either way, it's not good!

Also, tell your partner about your chronic health conditions, whether they be Can't Remember My Past, Would Eat A Guy If I Had The Opportunity, Stuck Some Nails In My Chest And Am Now Dying And Also Can't Get A Boner, or Whoops Took The Nails Out Of My Chest And Still Can't Get A Boner. Oh, and tell your partner if you're about to run off and go confront your dangerous ex. And absolutely tell your partner if you're about to fake your own death. Just ... learn to have conversations with the people who love you, okay? Avoid huge amounts of narrative suffering with this one weird trick!

5. Putting his whole Zhang Zhehussy into it

See, Gong Jun (playing Wen Kexing) is not what I'd call a great actor. This is more of a case where you take a guy, you cast him as a character whose motivation can be summed up as "I want to fuck that man in half," and then you cast opposite him a man that the guy in question clearly actually wants to fuck in half. And you let the magic work.

Zhang Zhehan (playing Zhou Zishu), however, legitimately knocks it entirely out of the park. Whenever the camera's on him, it's hard to take your eyes off him. He holds his own in a sea of veteran actors. He can do comedy and tragedy with equal panache. It's lucky he's such a beautiful crier, because Zhou Zishu cries so much. I have never seen someone more perfectly portray the mood of "in love and absolutely furious about it."

As the story goes, when he auditioned, he actually wanted to play Wen Kexing -- but the director told him, look, while you'd be great at that, I can find another Wen Kexing, but I'm never going to find another Zhou Zishu.

Zhou Zishu is bad man who has done terrible things and resigned himself to suffering to atone for his crimes, and he is so mad to find himself at the end of his life suddenly having a reason to keep living. Zhang Zhehan does a pitch-perfect tsundere right up to the point where he breaks. I'm not going to call it an understated performance, because nothing in this show is understated, but it is often times subtle and always complex, and fuck does he have a good crazy grin.

One of the first things you find out about Zhou Zishu is that he's got just a couple years left to live, over which time all his senses are going to deteriorate. In fact, they've already started going. And as the show goes on, you can watch Zhang Zhehan play it so you can tell when he's missed something he should otherwise have picked up on, reacting to noises and touches a split-second late. It's a testament to what a thoughtful job Zhang Zhehan's doing, keeping track of how much of Zhou Zishu has already slipped away.

There are, if you've read the book, legitimate complaints to be made about the adaptation's interpretation of Zhou Zishu's character, and I get that. But you can't say that Zhang Zhehan isn't pulling off exactly what he means to here. I say this too as someone who loves the novel: I think it works. Given the constraints of Chinese television in particular and cinematic adaptations in general, the show made the right choices when it came to figuring out what were the more filmable, actable options, and Zhang Zhehan plays every one of those choices within an inch of his life.

Also did I mention he's like the most beautiful man to ever exist? Holy crap. You're going to be so mad about what they do to his face for the first several episodes.

Don't worry, it washes off eventually.

caveat: Kind of a bummer!

You may have been warned that this one's got a sad ending. Well ... yes and no. On the "no" side of things, there's a "secret" mini-episode 37 that rolls back one of the major points of tragedy. (It's also clearly the first version that got shot, and then they shuffled around and redubbed some material to make the aired end of episode 36.)

But oh man, not all of them. Plenty of characters we love do not make it to the end. Like ... kind of a shockingly large number. Some are dispatched offscreen, some have tragic onscreen deaths, some are probably dead given the circumstances we last see them in, and a couple aren't dead yet but are almost certainly going to be soon.

(It's also kind of a meta-bummer! I mean, I don't recommend falling down the rabbit hole of what happened with Zhang Zhehan's career after the show aired, but tl;dr, it's not great.)

So yeah, it's not an outright pain simulator, and if you've got the mettle for Nirvana in Fire or Guardian, you should be okay here. But hoo boy, don't just blunder on in expecting a cheerful romp from start to finish, because ... yeah. I said it before: This is a story about a bunch of bad guys. Bad guys don't live long lives, nor do the good people who get tangled up in their shit. Just be prepared!

bonus selling point: black and white husbands

Okay, I will tell you who one of the other pairs of gays is. You'll see the two of them show up near the tail end of the show, and then you'll decide you want to know more about what their whole deal is, and then you'll read Qi Ye, which is a novel entirely about gay pining, and then it'll be all over for you.

Ready to wander this way?

There's a number of ways to watch this one! Viki, Netflix, YouTube, and Amazon Prime all have you covered -- but Viki's the only one that has the epilogue at the ready, so I'd go there if you can.

And I get it, if you're enough of an aging hipster that you don't want to play in the same sandbox everybody else is playing in. Believe me, I understand that impulse on a visceral level. After all, this is not a small fandom -- 7718 works on AO3 (at time of writing) isn't Untamed levels of content, but it's nothing to sneeze at. Maybe you want to leave this one for a little while longer, until the hubbub dies down a bit more and people's attention is redirected by a different gay and shiny thing. That's valid. I get it.

But if you do, I still encourage you to get around to it someday. For all its flaws -- and yeah, it's got flaws -- it's a good, solid story that makes you feel lots of feelings about some fascinating characters in some beautiful costumes, running around being real queer (and okay, occasionally straight) to beautiful music. This, to me, is television.

Fun fact! There is also a Japanese dub, if you feel like taking it at that speed, and the guy who voices Zhou Zishu is the voice of Kaworu from Evangelion, and the guy who voices Wen Kexing is the voice of Victor Nikiforov from Yuri on Ice. See what I mean???

I'm telling you, everybody ships it.

[medicinemane]

Well, I'm getting to do therapy, ultra mega super fucking extreme edition for my mom today

She's having a fucking breakdown cause GOP cost cutting means medicaid is being a bitch and being like if you're on medicare you no longer qualify for medicaid unless you can work and then and only then will we let you do a buy in

It's bullshit, it sucks, it's a stupid and broken system and someone being on disability should count as any work, but she's having one of the most extreme fucking breakdowns of all time over it

Like we're talking going on about how it's all her fault that the cats died who were living in the trailer cause of how toxic she let that place become, or that she's an utterly selfish person... and I'm sat here having to find ways to spin shit because she puts me in a position where in order to get her functional... what? I say "yeah, pretty much"?

Then she's like "I apologize for anything I've ever done to you", not accepted and never will be. You're doing shit to me right this fucking second with this

There's no atonement and that's kind of tough shit, and maybe if you wanted atonement don't make me parent you right now

I'm having to talk her down from being suicidal, cause I'm fucking Machiavellian with shit and I need that disability check to keep coming in

She's crying and just having the biggest breakdown she's probably had since one of my worst memories which I'm actively working to suppress cause I can't deal with it right now. She's fucking going over the various ghost shit and apologizing for it, and it's like I don't fucking care, stop fucking trying to pure and make yourself the horror that made everything awful... you're pretending to take responsibility, but what you're really doing is demanding I absolve you of everything

You know, the shit she's saying and the shit I was saying yesterday aren't that different. We both think we're hugely worthless pieces of shit who are totally unlovable (and my grandma is probably to blame for both mindsets)

Difference is that for as much as I downplayed it and said it didn't even count as cleaning, I was fucking moving like 10 boxes around to try and get things in a state where I can figure out how to clean shit, where as she's a totally nonfunctional mess

Like as much as everyone seems to want to bitch about when I'm... literally just trying to share how not ok I'm doing as best I fucking can, even when I'm at my lowest I'm still trying to work on shit

...also, one thing that's different between her and me is I've never been emotionally incestuous with my kid to the point where the very concept of family makes them sick, made them be my parent, and am now forcing them to be my therapist despite the fact the emotionally engaging with them is one of the single most destructive things I can do

I don't know... I'm real shit today, I'm gonna have to be in the car for like 4 but really more like 6 hours with her cause of the way she drives, cause I've got to go see family today and it's gotta be today cause that's when my uncle's around

I'm basically... fucking animating myself, like I'm in that state where you're not letting yourself fall apart cause you gotta hold it together cause you don't have a choice (oh, and I haven't fucking slept cause right when I was gonna go to bed I got summoned to come play therapist)

I'm shit right now, and I was already in a bad way... and in fact I'm doing so badly that I can't even maintain my normal fucking facades and politeness... nope, turns out that's not true and in fact my facades run deeper than I do and I 100% am still not gonna say certain things

But yeah, it's a shit day, one of the worst in a while cause it's probably the worst my mom's been in like... two decades... so that's fucking great huh?

Bonus, this bullshit with medicaid has cut her therapy sessions

If anyone gets to be pissed at them it's me, and I fucking am pissed, they can go fuck themselves, and everyone who votes to cute medicaid can know that I personally dislike them immensely

Unlike my mom though I'm not a literal fucking 12 year old (not even kidding, her problem is she's emotionally still like 12 or 14, she's literally fucking stunted there). Unlike her... I fucking function even when I'm doing bad

But serious, I was awful yesterday, just absolutely one of my low points. Only reason maybe I seem better today is basically the emotional equivalent of adrenaline

I'd be falling apart right now except for the part where I never actually fall apart or have breakdowns

[ghostofskywalker]

Hi how are you? Well, I hope. I wanted to request:

"Should I stop talking?" || "Don't, your voice is very soothing" with Peeta Mellark please.

Thank you!

i'm doing well, thank you!! i absolutely loved this prompt, thank you for giving me a chance to write some hunger games fic!

words: 822

summary: You and Peeta spend time in a cave, attempting to fall asleep in the arena.

Belief in Love Can Outweigh All Odds

note: in this fic the reader is taking katniss' position as the female tribute from district 12 in the 74th hunger games. no specific combat specialty or other description is noted.

peeta mellark masterlist

It was cold, damp, and dark in the cave, and you knew that there was no way you were going to find sleep anytime soon. The amount of adrenaline currently flowing through your body was making sure of that, along with the sharp pain that still emanated from the sizable wound on your arm. But as bad as you felt right now, Peeta was looking a lot worse. He shivered and twitched in his sleep, the medicine you had almost paid for with your life working much too slowly for your liking. 

You didn’t necessarily believe the Head Gamemaker’s voice in the sky, that the Games could have two victors if they came here from the same district, but you also didn’t want to give up on the tiny flicker of hope that had taken hold in your heart, the hope that you would be able to go home without having to kill a boy you had grown up with. 

You cared for Peeta, and that alone was worth the pain of betrayal you might feel down the line. All of this had started as a ruse to get sponsors, the way you felt about each other, and so far it had worked. But what you didn’t really want to admit to yourself just yet was that those feelings were very quickly becoming real. It was a side effect of the games, you tried to tell yourself, the way that your emotions heightened by the hour, but you knew it to be false. The Capitol would never knowingly facilitate the growth of emotions like love or kindness in this arena, they laughed and cheered at the appearance of tributes’ animalistic tendencies, taking a perverse comfort in the way human beings would do anything if it meant they would get to walk away alive. 

And speaking of your fellow District 12 tribute, you watched as he began to stir awake. “Are you okay?” he whispered, immediately turning his attention to you. 

“Yeah,” was your slightly shaky response. “No one is going to find us here.” 

“How’s your arm? Does it still hurt?” 

You shook your head. “I’m fine. And you know, I should be the one asking you how you’re doing, not the other way around.”

“I told you not to risk yourself for me and you still did,” he said, a smile flickering over his face as he registered your weak attempt at a joke. “I don’t think I will ever be able to repay you for that.” 

“You don’t have to repay me.” 

“I can’t-” 

But you cut him off before he could finish speaking. “Peeta, I mean it. We’re in this thing together until the end, and right now just being alive is enough for me.” 

His hand reached out to rest on your cheek, and the look in his eyes was something you never wanted to forget. He certainly was able to act the part of the lovesick teenager better than you were, and part of you almost believed that this moment was real. 

And of course, it only became more believable when he leaned in and kissed you. 

You had shared a chaste kiss with him once before on the tour, as a way to ward off any rumors of deceit or trickery, but this was much more passionate. Both of you were covered in dirt and grime at this point, but you didn’t care one bit as you kissed back. The little voice at the back of your mind informed you that the entirety of Panem was probably watching you right now, but even that didn’t really matter. Right now, you just wanted to enjoy this moment. 

When you finally pulled away, there was a smile on your face that you would never be able to hide, no matter how hard you tried. “We’re going to be okay,” you said softly as you settled next to him, your head gently resting on Peeta’s chest. “We’ll win the Games, and then we can return home together. We can-” 

But he cut you off by reaching down to take your hand, getting you to turn and look up at him. “We should get some rest,” he said. “We’re not out of here just yet.” 

You weren’t sure you could truly get yourself to sleep, especially after what just happened between you two, but you nodded. “So what you’re saying is that I should stop talking?” 

“Maybe,” he said, a small laugh escaping his mouth. “Don’t actually, your voice is very soothing.”

You smiled before continuing to speak, telling Peeta random bits of information about the forest and stories from your family back home in District 12. You could tell when he finally fell asleep, his breathing slow and steady as you listed to his heartbeat, and all you could do was desperately hope that the two of you would actually be able to make it out of here alive. 

- the end -

i no longer have a taglist! if you're interested in being notified when i post, you can follow my library blog @ghostofskywalker-library and turn on notifications!

[jebewonmorelike]

Charisma Boss Employee

wc: 3.5k (oh no guys, i'm only getting worse) pronouns: none used; n/a warnings: some angst; some fluff! this is a powerful one. some swears, mention of an ill mother, ricky's dad is mean :( but it's just a story! i'm sure ricky's real dad is very nice lol summary: when richboy!ricky crashes his car, his dad takes away his credit card and forces him to get a part time job at the diner-- and reader is the unlucky employee tasked with training him ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ CELEBRATORY FIC FOR RICKY TOP 9! This is an epic you guys. I think you'll really love it! For some reason, Ricky inspires some great plot lines for me. And I just love richboy!Ricky he's such a doll.

Ricky was not having a good day. In fact, Ricky was having a no good, very bad day and he was not about to be pleasant to the worker training him to make a vanilla milkshake.

“So you’ll pour the milk in with the ice, screw the lid on and shake the container,” you explain, handing the tall blonde boy next to you the carton of milk.

He takes it reluctantly, measuring the 10 oz. without much care and screwing the lid on.

“Make sure that it’s—,” you start to warn, but he’s already shaking the container…

And it’s contents has already flown out from the loose lid and drenched the both of you.

He winces, an exhale of an embarrassed laugh escaping his lips.

“Maybe if you took the sunglasses off, you would’ve been able to see that you hadn’t tightened the lid all the way,” you say annoyedly.

He shakes his head quickly. “I can’t take them off.”

But being covered in a mess that this stupid rich kid made has not positively impacted your level of patience for his ridiculousness, so you reach up and snatch the sunglasses off of his face.

“Hey! Give them back!” He protests as you run around to the other side of the counter with them, quickly closing the bar top on the counter so he can’t follow you. You watch as he attempts to open the passageway in the counter, but lucky for you he wasn't paying attention when you had shown him where the latch is.

"Please," he begs now, looking around frantically as he places his large hand above his eyes to seemingly block the view of his face. "Please, I don't want anyone to see me here."

You snort. "People see me here every day and I have yet to die of embarrassment."

"Yeah, well, I'm not like you," Ricky remarks snidely, sinking down below the counter to hide from customers.

How had this happened to you? You clocked in this afternoon with a pretty good attitude: this was the eighth-to-last shift you'd have to work before finally having saved enough money to buy the little red Kia Rio from the used car dealership down the road.

But that good attitude was suddenly shattered when you saw your boss standing in the kitchen with an older, professional-looking man in a suit and a tall, blonde boy wearing Prada sunglasses indoors. You weren't quite sure what was happening yet, but you felt a sinking feeling in your gut nevertheless.

"(Y/N), you're late," your boss said as you walked towards the little gathering in the kitchen.

Your brow furrowed in confusion. "What? No, I'm not; my shift doesn't start until--."

"This is the building owner, Mr. Shen," your boss introduced, cutting you off. "And this is his son, Ricky."

Your eyes widened, nodding out of respect and smiling politely at Mr. Shen. "It's nice to meet you."

"Sure," Mr. Shen replied flippantly. "Quanrui, say hello."

"Hello," Ricky greeted reluctantly, looking back down at his phone screen. You studied him for a moment, taking note of the dyed blonde hair, the Rolex on his lithe wrist, and the thin, delicate tattoo running down his neck behind one ear. The best way you could think to describe him was... punchable.

"You're going to be training Mr. Shen's son for the next few days," your boss announced. "Like I told you about last week."

"What!? You didn't tell me that--."

Mr. Shen cut you off abruptly. "As Tom here probably told you--."

"It's Tim," your boss corrected quietly.

"My son crashed his car last week on a midnight joyride around the city," Mr. Shen continued, glaring at Ricky, whose eyes were still glued to his phone. "So, as punishment, I've taken away all his credit cards and I've asked Tom if he could give him a little job here for a bit until he's learned his lesson."

"It's actually...," your boss laughed much too cheerily before he continued, "It's actually Tim, sir, but whatever you prefer is fine. Our shift manager, (Y/N) here, is so grateful to get the opportunity to train your very capable, and might I add handsome, son. Isn't that right, (Y/N)?"

"Well--."

"Exactly! Go grab an apron and a pair of ears for Ricky," Tim ordered you, as you ran to the corner of the room to grab the supplies.

"Ears?" Ricky asked suddenly, finally looking up from his phone.

"Oh... Yes, ears! The Hungry Dog Diner-- all of the waitstaff wear dog-eared headbands," Tim explained enthusiastically as you walked back over and handed Ricky the uniform pieces.

"Why did I invest in this business again?" Mr. Shen asked in an alarmingly genuine tone.

You watched as Ricky flipped the ears over in his hands, horrified. "Dad, do I really have to wear this?"

"Son... You are a terrible student, you can't take direction, and you have no work ethic. I'm not sure if you possess any skills at all," Mr. Shen announced harshly. "No other business is going to hire you except the ones that I own, so just make it easy on us all and put the ears on, Quanrui."

You had to work quite hard to keep your eyes from widening at Mr. Shen's rather stiff criticism of his son, especially in front of strangers. You couldn't help but wonder what he said when no one else was present. Ricky solemnly placed the dog ears over his perfectly-coiffed blonde hair, the loop of the apron finding its way around his neck.

In that moment, if he wasn't so positively punchable-looking, you might've almost felt sorry for him.

"Excellent!" Tim exclaimed, clapping his hands together in the midst of the looming awkward silence. "(Y/N), why don't you show Ricky the milkshake machine? That would be a great spot for that handsome face to be seen by customers!"

Ricky audibly groaned as you led him out of the kitchen to the front countertop area.

~

And now, here you are. Covered in ice and milk, holding Ricky's sunglasses and allowing the implications of the sentence, "Well, I'm not like you," to sink in.

"Bastard," you say.

Ricky's wide eyes appear from behind the counter as he sits up on his knees to peak out at you. "What did you just say?"

"You rat bastard," you repeat, staring him directly in the eye. "You're not like me? Then why are we both wearing this stupid apron and these ridiculous dog ears, huh? Why are we both working this annoying ass part-time job? Why are we both covered in milkshake ingredients?"

You're surprised when Ricky doesn't retaliate, just stares back at you in shock.

"I actually think we have a lot in common right now. The only difference being that, for the next six hours, I'm in charge. So you're gonna take off these sunglasses and make every flavor of milkshake absolutely perfectly, or I am going to fire you!"

Ricky blinks, tilting his head to one side curiously. "Would you really fire me?"

You stare back at him wordlessly, confused by his lack of anger.

"Even though my dad would probably sue you or frame you for some petty crime or something?"

Ricky stands up from behind the counter, nodding appreciatively. "That's kind of badass."

He takes your apparent inability to speak or move as an opportunity to grab his sunglasses from your hand. "I'm gonna get all of this milk off of me. I'll be right back-- and I'll put these away in my bag."

After another moment of temporary paralysis, you run to the customers' bathrooms and clean yourself up. When you make your way back to the counter, you watch as Ricky very diligently measures 10 oz. of milk into the shaker cup.

~

"Okay! Time to head out, Ricky," you call from the kitchen, panicking slightly when you're met with silence. "Ricky?"

You run from the kitchen to the countertop area quickly, just in time to see Ricky holding all of the quarters from the cash register in his hand and counting them with his fingers (and then recounting them when he loses track of the total).

You have to admit... He looks pretty cute like this.

Ricky had been a pretty decent employee for the rest of the day. He mastered a few milkshake flavors, he seated customers in booths, and you'd even let him close the register after proper demonstration. Quite honestly, he was nowhere near as incompetent as his father had made him out to be.

Not only that, but you'd found he was fairly easy to get along with when he wasn't being a spoiled brat.

Tip-toeing your way over to him, you lightly smack his upper arm. "Boo!"

"NO!" He shouts in defeat. "I ALMOST HAD IT THAT TIME!"

You can't help but laugh, holding out your hand for him to pour the quarters into. You count them in less than ten seconds and drop them back in the drawer.

"Whoah," Ricky says, shaking his head as you finish counting the rest of the coins. "I really don't have any skills, do I?"

"Stop that," you say, entering the final totals into the register and closing it down. "It's not easy. You'll get better with practice. Besides, I watched you do a bunch of things today that I would say required skills."

"Oh," he replies, clearly not expecting your kindness. "Thanks."

You smile. "Same time tomorrow?"

"TOMORROW!?" He exclaims, hanging his head sadly. "But we were just here today."

You chuckle. "Welcome to the working world, Ricky."

~

"Here you go, one strawberry and one cookie dough milkshake for the two runway models on lunch break," Ricky says, placing the drinks on the counter. The two girls giggle, cheersing and placing the paper straws in their mouths.

This week had gone quite differently than you'd expected. It seemed as if word had gotten out that a rich, handsome young man had started working the counter at Hungry Dog's and groups of girls had flocked to the diner the past few days to get a milkshake from Ricky.

Though very wary of being seen on his first day, Ricky was now eating up the positive attention. He didn't even seem to mind wearing the dog ears. He conversed easily with the customers, tastefully flirting even with the regular group of elderly women that came in for lunch every Thursday. He was a natural.

And you hate to admit it, but... it's irking you a bit. You'd been Ricky's go-to pal the first few days and you enjoyed joking back and forth with him. He'd shared a lot about his life with you, in the way that coworkers often do. He'd talked about school, his friends, and even his dad and you liked having these conversations with him. Everyone else that worked here before him had been so boring. But now every girl in the city was coming to the diner for a milkshake and vying for his attention.

Maybe you should have let him keep his sunglasses on after all...

"(Y/N)!" He calls, grinning. You put your rag down on the table you're cleaning and make your way over to the counter. "I'm sorry, I don't remember the recipe for the peanut butter chocolate milkshake."

"That's okay," you say, grabbing a glass and opening the cooler. You point to the peanut butter sauce, chocolate chips, and the peanut butter cups. "Three tablespoons of this, a quarter cup of these, and a good handful of these, too."

"He has such big hands though," the girl at the counter admires.

"Uh..." You look down at Ricky's hands by his sides. "Yeah, I guess. I hope you really like peanut butter cups."

He frowns when you meet his gaze. You start to walk back to the table you were cleaning when you hear Ricky again. "(Y/N)?"

You turn to face him, noticing he still looks kind of upset.

"Chocolate ice cream?" He asks quietly.

"Chocolate ice cream," you confirm, giving him a half-hearted smile as you resume your buswork.

~

"What is the meaning of this?"

Your eyes dart to find the origin of the sound, spotting Mr. Shen standing angrily in the doorway with your boss on his heels. "Quanrui, what on Earth is going on?"

Ricky blinks back anxiously at his father. "I'm--... I'm working?"

"No you're not! You're surrounded by girls," Mr. Shen replies, walking towards his son.

"Well, they are paying customers," Tim responds softly, scurrying behind Mr. Shen as the girls on the barstools at the counter get up and leave hurriedly. You walk over to the countertop area cautiously.

"This is supposed to be a punishment. Where is that worker who trained you?" Ricky's father demands.

You clear your throat and step out from behind him. "I'm here."

"What exactly have you been doing? He's supposed to be miserable! I mean, for god's sake, he's making a milkshake and he's smiling. Smiling!" Mr. Shen exclaims, a stern finger pointing at you. "That's not right."

You swallow, maintaining an even temper. "Is a frown more suited for milkshake-making?"

From the corner of your eye, you see Ricky's eyes widen a concerned amount.

"On Sunday, you said Ricky had no skills. You basically called him useless in front of people he'd never met before. And I thought, at first, that maybe you were right; an irresponsible rich kid cruising through life and he'd be a pain in my ass. But, honestly... He's been great. He can take direction, follow a recipe, clean a table-- hell, he can almost count change!"

"Well, I can count change, I just--."

"And his most notable skill: charisma. I mean, we haven't made money like this in years! There's been people flying in and out of here all week just to look at Ricky. I've overheard him talking to customers for the past few days and he's just really great with people," you say, not backing down.

"That doesn't make any sense! He barely says two words to me," Mr. Shen rebuts.

You want to hold your tongue, but, with everything going on in your life... you just can't. "Maybe you should think about why that is."

If people could explode from anger, Mr. Shen would be in pieces by now. "Is this true, Ricky?"

You look up at Ricky, hoping that maybe he could find it in him to stand up for himself-- especially after you'd just done the heavy-lifting for him.

But he's not looking at you. He's not looking at anyone. He's just staring at the floor.

Mr. Shen is frightening now as his voice comes out so coolly, "Tom, fire this worker at once."

Tim looks at you uncertainly. You're his best employee. But you know the chances of Tim sticking up for you are slim to none. You've fought this battle alone-- and for what?

"Just go," Tim says, mouthing an I'm sorry after.

So you go. You're running back into the kitchen, taking off your apron and throwing your stupid dog ears onto the floor. You're so upset that you don't hear footsteps approaching behind you as you walk towards the back door.

"(Y/N)!" Ricky calls, hand finding your shoulder. You turn around on your heels to face him.

"What?" You spit. "What could you possibly want? Huh?"

"I--... I wanted to see if you're okay."

"Okay? I just lost my job... for defending you, of all people! I must be crazy," you say, shaking your head in disbelief at your own actions.

Ricky's brows furrow in defense, his eyes a bit sad like they had been earlier. "Well, it's not like I made you do that."

"No, you didn't," you say, nodding as you understand the error in judgment you've made. "So, I guess I'll just get going."

"Oh, come on!" Ricky exclaims, not letting go of your shoulder. "You're telling me you liked working here all this time? You're way smarter than me-- shouldn't you be trying to go back to school?"

"My mom is sick." The words escape your mouth before you can swallow them back down as you watch the shock contort Ricky's face. "I was working here to save up money for a car so I could stay at the hospital even after the buses stop running."

He stares back at you; the silence, deafening.

"Good luck, Ricky," you say finally, pushing the back door open and stepping out into the warm, afternoon air.

~

Come to the diner, I need you to calculate our expenses for the month

You fired me.

I knowwwwww. I said I was sorry! But I really need your help. And I know you'd hate for this diner you've spent so many pathetic years of your life working at to close down :(

You are not helping your case.

I'm sorry, please just come as soon as you can

Fine.

So, here you are again thanks to Tim's text. Walking through the back door of Hungry Dog's Diner like you do every day. But something's off when you step inside. When you realize you can't hear any noise, you look around concernedly for a body-- any body would do to ease your anxiety.

Just then, Ricky walks into the kitchen. He smiles timidly.

"Hi," he greets, a little awkward wave accompanying the word.

"Hi," you return, unamusedly.

"Tim's out here," he says, walking out of the kitchen as you reluctantly follow. You walk past the counter and out towards the booths, Tim waving at you from one in the back.

But as you walk past the glass doors, you see something in the parking lot that has you frozen in your tracks.

There, in the parking lot of Hungry Dog's Diner, is the little red Kia Rio from the used car dealership down the road.

"Go look at it," Ricky says behind you, gently pushing you forward.

You run out through the doors and stare at it in awe before remembering who brought you out here to see it in the first place.

Turning around slowly, your eyes meet Ricky's. His bottom lip is between his teeth as he chews it in nervous anticipation. You step up to him, silent before smacking his chest with your hand, hard.

"Ow!" He yelps, rubbing the spot that you hit.

"What's wrong with you?"

"You hit me," he complains with a pout.

"Your dad gave you your credit card back, huh? You think you can just buy something for me and your dad can pay it off and all will be forgiven?" You accuse, tears quickly welling up in your eyes from frustration.

“No! No, no, it’s—… it’s not like that! I swear,” he claims, sincere eyes boring into yours. “I bought it with my own savings. It was... It was almost everything I had.”

You stare back at him wide-eyed for a few moments and then hit him again. “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU!?”

“OW!” He yelps louder, rubbing his chest once more.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” you say, a mixture of emotions now flooding your senses. “That’s—… It’s—… You didn’t have to do that.”

It hits you now— a wave of immense, conflicting gratitude and embarrassment. You’re suddenly wailing quite cartoonishly, tears running out of you so quickly you’re afraid you might form a puddle.

"I'm just really sorry. I should have defended you... and I should've stood up for myself, too. You've been really nice to me this whole week and I can't imagine I was always particularly easy to deal with," Ricky apologizes, swallowing hard before continuing. "You really need this and it's my fault you weren't able to get it on your own. I was actually gonna by myself a new car with the money, but... what would I have been using it for?"

"How did you know this is the one I wanted?"

He laughs. "Tim said you showed everyone that walked through the doors a picture of it at least once."

You smile sheepishly, before uncertainty causes you to sigh. "Still, Ricky, this--."

"Maybe you can just drive me to work from now on," he suggests, a shy smile now gracing his lips. "And we'll call it even."

"To work?" You ask, tilting your head.

He smiles. "Yeah. You're rehired. Duh. I, uh... I finally talked to my dad about everything. And I told him I would be really lost at Hungry Dog's Diner without you."

You smile, a blush creeping onto your cheeks. "I'll repay you for this. I promise."

"Go ahead, get in!" Ricky says with a laugh, reaching in his back pocket and tossing you the key. You run to the driver's side and fling open the door, hopping inside and turning on the car. Ricky gets in the passenger side and looks around appreciatively.

"Not a McLaren, but it's got charm," he says, nodding.

"I love it," you reply, grinning at him. "I really love it. Thank you."

"You know, I might need a ride other places once in a while, too, like... out to dinner?"

"Why would I drive you to go out to dinner?" You ask, obliviously.

He blinks back at you, waiting for you to comprehend.

"Oh!" You gasp, ears burning as you bask in the heat of his gaze. "Oh, um... I guess, yeah. Yeah, I could probably... I could probably drive you to dinner. And then eat dinner with you."

"Good," he says happily, grinning at you as he leans back in the car seat, flipping his sunglasses down over his eyes. "But since I'm actually broke now, you're paying."

[dragons-hoard-of-fandoms]

(Murder Drones Episode 7 spoilers!)

THEY CHANGED THE INTRO V IS OFFICIALLY DEAD FUNERAL'S ON THURSDAY

Cult. It's a cult. This is definitely a cult. They probably don't even realize it but it is undeniably some kind of cult.

Nori what are you doing. Nori why are you like this.

The cross is a USB??

They're keeping the Drones themselves in the lockers??

Of course the unpaid intern whose opinion doesn't matter is the only one with any sympathy for them.

Pink Solver core?? SOLVER LIZZY?!?

Ah great, the Envy shippers are gonna be using this as "proof" that he's still in love with V.

HE IMMEDIATELY APOLOGIZED HE LOVES HER SO MUCH

Tessa. Stop. I was willing to give you the benefit of a doubt but you're not doing yourself any favours.

And now she's being racist. Way to go.

"The power of a black hole in the palm of my hand."

SEE TESSA ALL YOU DID WAS MAKE EVERYTHING WORSE

THEY'RE BACK THAD AND LIZZY ARE FINALLY RELEVANT AGAIN

Did they change Thad's VA? He sounds different.

Was that V? Is she already back?

N BABY NO DON'T SAY THAT YOU DON'T DESERVE THIS

Eldritch V??

I can't wait for people to meme about his perfectly cut scream there.

Not going near the corpse. Smart move.

Cyn stop. Cyn stop. CYN STOP PLEASE I'M BEGGING I WANT YOU TO BE SYMPATHETIC

She hugged him. That's probably a good thing, right? That's probably proof that the real Cyn is still in there somewhere, right? THAT PROBABLY MEANS SHE MISSES HIM AND IS GENUINELY SORRY RIGHT

Nothin' like a good old-fashioned Robot Uprising Apocalypse, eh? In other news, Skynet is suing the Solver for copyright infringement.

Those admin privileges comin' in handy. Unfortunately they don't do much in the physical world.

Uzi has absolutely no reason to be crawling and scuttling around like a creature right now except for the simple fact that she wants to. Never change, little gremlin.

Oh I don't think you should watch that. N was right, y'know, there's probably stuff down here you don't wanna see.

Why does this remind me of the garbage maze in FNaF Security Breach?

Okay so it's not some kind of disembodied Solver Lizzy core. Don't blame me, the lights looked pink before and the cat ears headphones reminded me of Lizzy's bow.

Familiar?? Nori??? DID N ACTUALLY KILL YOU AND WHY AREN'T YOU BRITISH/MOMMY LONG LEGS

Khan? A hunk? In the words of Professor Membrane, NOT SCIENTIFICALLY POSSIBLE!!!

"How do you know my daughter?" "Well y'see, it all started when we tried to kill each other..."

Oh it was J. Is it bad to say I'm kind of relieved?

Are we getting the cool edgy Khan from the concept art??? Bro why are you so nonchalant about it being the end of the world.

INB4 people go frame-by-frame through the list looking for the most Russian-sounding name and say "THERE, THAT'S DOLL'S DAD"

Tessa was that really necessary? You're giving really bad vibes right now.

Patch? So the Solver can be removed? And she knows? Again, major bad vibes.

*FNaF 2 Foxy jumpscare*

I'm starting to suspect Yeva either can't or chooses not to talk.

Is she saying the Solver wiped her memory of the labs? I guess that would explain a few things.

N being so polite and cute as always.

What do you mean, "found its way back?" Where did it go? Is the timeline completely wrong? Did it start on Copper-9 then go to Earth then return to Copper-9? I'm so confused.

Nori why are you so casual about the prospect of your own daughter being a planet-eating eldritch abomination. This is exactly why I'm worried about the fandom giving you the Rose Quartz treatment.

I told you not to watch it, Uzi.

Welp, so much for Doll. Consider this karma for killing V. But "fight back?" Does that mean it can be resisted?

So now we know where Uzi gets it from.

Tessa no. Tessa stop. Tessa STOP. TESSA STOP YOU'RE NOT EVEN TRYING TO PRETEND TO HELP ANYMORE

YEAH N SAVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND

Whoa, didn't see that coming. No face reveal?? Does that mean she really is a Drone???

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET THEM BE HAPPY

Imagine meeting your daughter for the first time and she's currently being possessed by an eldritch abomination masquerading as her boyfriend's dead sister.

Every time I think this episode's about to end on a cliffhanger it doesn't.

EVEN WHEN SHE'S BEING POSSESSED BY AN ELDRITCH ABOMINATION MASQUERADING AS HIS DEAD SISTER HE WOULD RATHER DIE THAN LET HER BE HURT AND IT WAS ENOUGH TO SNAP HER OUT OF IT FOR LIKE HALF A SECOND HOW COULD ANYBODY SAY THEY'RE NOT IN LOVE

Oh no, now people are gonna write fics about Nori being vored by her own daughter.

"Hang out" is code for "date." "Hang out" is code for "boyfriend and girlfriend." "Hang out" is code for "madly in love with each other." "HANG OUT" IS CODE FOR "WE MAKE SWEET AND PASSIONATE LOVE TOGETHER EVERY SINGLE NIGHT WE'RE ALREADY PLANNING THE WEDDING AND I'M GONNA WEAR THE DRESS AND WE'RE GONNA NAME OUR KIDS GLOCK AND BAYONET"

Literally smacked the sense back into her.

Imagine meeting your mom for the first time and you don't know who she is and she's a gross little fleshy crab-spider-thing similar to what your boyfriend's jerk boss turned into so you punt her into a bottomless pit and she makes a dodgeball noise.

LOOK AT HER REACTION SHE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT "HANG OUT" IS CODE FOR SHE JUST DIDN'T REALIZE HE THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY TOO

My last two brain cells while watching this episode. Now would be a really good time for you two to kiss.

Oh good gosh she's not dead. Okay it wasn't at all necessary to put your head on backwards.

CYN IS HUMAN NOW??? OR IS SHE WEARING TESSA'S BODY LIKE ENNARD DID WITH MICHAEL

NO JUST LEAVE THEM ALONE ALREADY

Sorry J but you're still not plot relevant yet, you're not allowed to participate.

J: *sees the railgun* *has war flashbacks*

UZI YOU CAN'T SACRIFICE YOURSELF RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM AND TELL HIM TO "DIE MAD" AS YOUR LAST WORDS THAT IS LITERALLY NOT OKAY

*Uzi falls* *screen fades to white* *UNDERTALE*

The Void???

Glitch I beg of you please don't make us wait another half a year for the next episode. And Liam please don't let it end after one season.

[headspace-hotel]

U gotta stop arguing with vegans. They are incorrigibly stupid and, worse, entirely convinced that they are right. It's like arguing with a brick wall. Block them and move on for ur own sake

The one vegan I've known pretty well in real life is a perfectly lovely person...but then again, not the type to get involved in internet arguments.

Like I think it's a noble pursuit to try to reduce harm to animals and live sustainably, and things like "uhhh we probably shouldn't be devoting A Third Of The Country's Land Area to producing Only Beef" and "Hey it's really fucked up how we breed chickens to grow so fast that they can't even stand" are just common sense.

But it's important to me that people can distinguish things like that from ridiculous bullshit like "it's impossible to get milk from an animal without killing the offspring" and "artificial insemination is raping animals"

...Am I the only one who thinks that in general, as a society, we should pay more attention to an animal's emotional responses to a thing than necessarily the intent of a thing in judging whether that thing is "abusive?" One of the folks in the replies, when I brought up artificial insemination as a way of saving endangered species that are highly sensitive to stress, said basically "well at least that's for the benefit of animals" And I'm just ?????? If you actually believe it's rape, does that actually matter?

Meanwhile there are plenty of animals that are in screaming-and-soiling themselves levels of distress from going to a groomer or the vet and that's laughed off as "being dramatic" because it's "for the animal's own good"

Like obviously [for the ever-present people in my notes who can't read] animals will need veterinary care sometimes, but I've known animals that gave their owners permanent scars and pretty much consistently lost control of their bowels because they were so scared of the vet, and I think that should be taken seriously as "traumatic" and as an animal welfare issue because The Animal Is Literally Telling You It Is In Extreme Distress and I feel like there has to be ways to get your cat a rabies shot without scarring the poor thing for life. Like, Good Lord.

I've seen vids on here of kittens being given medicine or handled/socialized that people I guess freaked out about, but the kitten shown, while not pleased, was clearly trusting and not, like, losing its mind with terror. Meanwhile a dog that growls when you brush its hair is "bad" and "dramatic" etc etc.

I guess the thing that gets me about it is that people judge how distressed the animal actually is based on how "justified" they perceive the thing to be, and not what the animal is communicating.

That's the thing! Animals communicate, and i'm not an expert but I reckon that an animal actually being in distress is automatically more of a welfare concern than something that "sounds like" it "should" be distressing.

That got kinda long, oops. Anyway yeah, no productive conversations going on.

[wormbraind]

based on @glassknee's post and @notevenalittle1294's addition, i present to you: the sims endbringer mod, pho style (but not really, this is a fictional sims forum)

♦ Topic: [Self-promo] Endbringer Mod In: Boards ► Modding FKNSHJ (Original Poster) Posted On Apr 20th 2012: Hi all. 🙂 I’m excited to share this mod I’ve been working on. It involves randomized Endbringer attacks. By default they’re fairly more common than they are in real life, happening maybe once every ten in-game years, but if you look at read_me.txt in the downloads I’ve enclosed information on how to alter the probability and how to trigger specific Endbringers as well as how to make them easier or harder to defeat. Besides that I also included CC and a few Easter eggs that won't affect your gameplay.

(Showing page 1 of 2)

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: whoa, so cool :D i dont play with my sims much so ill try activating some endbringer attacks and see how it goes. im pretty bad at coding tho... ^_^

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: Hey what the fuck? Endbringers aren't a joke. You've clearly never seen the aftermath of an attack, this is making a mockery out of the trauma of Endbringer victims such as myself. Who even comes up with this stuff???

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: im getting my popcorn lmfao

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: trite let's keep this civil, please, don't swear...

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: Wait, isn't this the guy who posted those *suggestive* images of Leviathan?

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostland what?? on here?? where?? not in a weird way like i don't want to see them but proof?

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +hshater Ok weirdo. It was on some PHO dupe (it has better information but worse moderation) and I only remember because it was weird + the random letter username stuck with me. I'll DM you the link once I find it.

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostsea yeah yeah take your time. FJSKJ you've got anything to say for yourself?

►oldlostsea Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +hshater I found his account on the site and I downloaded the mod. Definitely the same person. The art style resemblance is uncanny. Sending you the link RN.

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►spaceg1rl (Suspended) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: why does the mod's art look like that? yeah he definitely wants to fuck them screenshot(64).png

►hole (Moderator) (2011 Simp Comp Winner) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @spaceg1rl This is your fifth infraction this year. Suspended for two months.

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +oldlostsea sorry i was walking my dog. and yeah that looks exactly the same as what spacegirl (rip) posted +hole i mean this as kindly as possible pleasedontgivemeawarning but with that username what grounds do you have to stand on

►hole (Moderator) (2011 Simp Comp Winner) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @hshater It's a reference to Hole, the band, of which I made many Sims. You can see them in my Round 2 submission to last year's Sim Comp

►hshater Replied On Apr 20th 2012: yeah i'm sorry to break it to you but your tag says simp comp. congrats though!

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: i really love the atmosphere and the art and the cc... really surprised this was made by one person! good job!

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: +termina2 You are literally contributing to the normalization of Endbringer attacks.

►termina2 (2011 Sim Comp Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: ?? im going to log off for a bit to work on a school project. really dont like how toxic you all are getting :( it's just a mod

►tritebuilds (2011 Build Comp Semi-Finalist) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: @cookiecrumbles @tenovertwosmallstones PLEASE remove this. It's extremely offensive and potentially f*tish content.

►cookiecrumbles (Moderator) Replied On Apr 20th 2012: I'm disabling replies while we discuss this. Please avoid harassing each other anywhere else in the meantime.

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[writingintheshadowsforever]

It Was Real For Me Too Monica Rambeau x Reader

Summary: Monica is convinced you hated every second being trapped in Wanda's hex with her. In reality she couldn't be more wrong if only she gave you the chance to explain.

Carol raised a single eyebrow walking into the storage room of her ship. Where she kept all her extra cargo and miscellaneous items to see Monica rummaging around. The sound of stuff falling from the shelves along with someone whispering curse words is what drew her there. She already knew the identity of the culprit considering they were only four people on her ship counting herself.

You were off playing twenty questions with Kamala, and she was sure the young girl was taking notes for her fanfiction. That only left one person, and she'd been scarce from the moment you arrived on the ship.

"Is there something I can help you find?" Carol asked smirking when Monica jumped a little bit.

She threw a quick glare at the superhero who was still more of a mother figure to her. Then went back to searching through various boxes on the floor without a word. Her relationship was already rocky since the two still haven't worked through the abandonment issue, but it only got worse. When Carol decided to call you in to assist on the mission without consulting her first.

"Mon come on you're not the one who has to reorganize all this later" Carol pleaded.

"Do you have any liquor or wine on this ship?"

"I do but you won't find it here."

Monica stood up and turned around with a frustrated huff. "Where will I find it then?"

"I'll tell you if you answer a few questions."

Monica shook her head in refusal. "You owe me Carol you don't get to holdout on me."

"I do if you want the only bottle of wine I have plus I need to know what's going with you with what's at stake with this mission. Why does y/n being here bother you so much?"

"Its that obvious huh."

Carol nodded.

Monica let out a groan taking a seat on large container. She tried really hard to keep her cool once she realized you were on the ship. But then the two of you locked eyes, and it was her first time seeing you in almost a year. Her heart skipped a few beats as her legs turned into jelly when you hit her with that dazzling smile. The term absence makes the heart grow fonder couldn't be more true in this situation. She'd hope the time spent apart from you would've done the opposite, and erase her feelings for you. They just got stronger.

"I really don't want to talk about it Carol" Monica tried.

"Too bad y/n won't give me anything out of respect for you, and like I said I need to know what I'm dealing with here." Carol persisted not sounding apologetic at all. She was probably enjoying it in some weird way, because now Monica didn't have a choice but to confide in her a little bit.

Monica took a deep breath trying to figure out a way to explain her situation-ship with you without giving away too much. "You know I got trapped in a witch's hex right?"

"Yeah the one that gave you your powers right" Carol said following along.

"Well I kinda left out the part where y/n got trapped in it with me, and we were basically a couple doing couple things. Until I triggered Wanda's memory and she sent me packing." Monica explained hoping she didn't have to elaborate beyond that.

Carol frowned for a second before her eyes widened in shock only for a look of amusement to take over in the end. "Seriously aren't the two of you like best friends?"

"Yeah."

"Okay I get how it that could be weird at first, but it’s been a year. How haven't you two worked this out by now?"

Monica gave no reply and suddenly the container she was sitting on became ten times more interesting.

"Unless there's something else going on you haven't told me" The blonde woman added. A teasing tone in her voice to match the playful smirk on her face.

"Nope there is nothing else to tell" Monica lied. "You know what forget about the wine. Let's just go back to the mission."

She tried to scurry past Carol but a hand reached out catching her by the arm. Her grip strong and while she may have powers none of them let her match Captain Marvel's strength.

"Carol please just drop it."

"Let's go get the wine you're going to need it."

A Few Hours Later

Carol allowed Monica to drink enough to relax her a little bit before cutting her off. She probably would've finished off the bottle if she wasn't stopped. Carol had an idea or two of what was really going on, but decided it was just better until they got the coordinates from Kamala's mind to the next destination. Before trying to get the two of you to work through the issue. She could tell right away you weren't going to the problem in the matter.

You lit up with joy when she walked into the main hub of the ship with Monica in tow. "About time I thought you two were trying to sneak off without us or something."

Carol walked over to retrieve four head-gear contraptions that looked like a head-massager helmet. She gave one out to each of you explaining the process. "This will let us access Kamala's memories and see what she saw on the ship. No need to fear or worry I use it all the time trying to recover the memories. The Kree took me."

Monica shot her a look of sympathy. "Still."

Carol nodded sliding the head piece on.

"Wait will be able too see each other's memories as well?" You asked twisting it around in your hands.

"Yeah but as long as you don't focus on a particular memory too much. We'll be fine and won't be pulled into something else" Carol instructed.

For the first time both you and Monica squirmed a little bit glancing at each other nervously. You put the head piece on after along with Kamala, while your best friend still hesitated.

"Mon come on you got this" You encouraged her softly.

She took a deep breath letting your words wash over her and take effect. All of her worries seemed to disappear just like old times whenever you were by her side. You always looked after her if she fell you'd catch her. She put the head piece on.

Carol took the spacious couch with Kamala by her side. You laid down beside Monica for moral support. It was the first time the woman allowed you to be this close to her since you arrived on the ship. All four of you closed your eyes at the same time letting your minds link to each other. Kamala went back to the first fight with Dar-Benn. You were absent for the showdown, so you took in every single detail not just the coordinates. Carol told you that her powers were linked to Monica's and Kamala's.

You didn't know what she meant until now watching the fight play out. The three of them switching places whenever the other used their light-based powers. Carol brought you in because of your past with Kree she figured you could offer her an inside look on whar Dar-Benn's plan might be. The memory-sharing moved along smoothly as all three of you got a glimpse at the map.

Kamala played the memory back in slow-motion so you three could memorize it. Carol's mind went haywire letting her memories bleed into Kamala's throwing the three of you back into the past. The days of the Blip Carol and and Maria sitting on the front porch of Monica's childhood home talking about Monica, and other things.

Of course Monica freaked out trying to pull out, but not being able too. "Carol stop I don't want to remember this."

"I'm sorry I'm not doing this on purpose." Carol attempted to rein the memories again, but the door was open letting every moment flood out. Including the one where she promised a eleven-year old Monica she'd see her soon. All of you knew how that promise ended.

"Carol that's enough." Monica was begging now her voice cracking as the memory switched to her mother on her deathbed. Without thinking about you took her hand in yours squeezing it.

"Breathe Mon it's okay."

Carol's memories were pushed aside as a new wave took over overpowering her. They belonged to Monica and all of them were with you. The first day you and her met when Nick Fury called you in to help Monica deal with the aftermath of being blipped. Her breaking down in your arms after finding out about Maria's death. All the nights you spent holding her to chase the nightmares away, because your presence was the only thing that could soothe her. The memories were nothing new to you, and innocence. Monica panicked as she felt her control slip though, and memories you might've not been aware of appeared. "How do I stop this."

Now all four of you were back in Westview and while you were aware of what Wanda 's actions. This memory was new to you Monica in her S.W.O.R.D. uniform racing through the neighborhood. She ran right past the home she shared with you in the hex in a rush to get to Wanda. But you were still under mind control walking out the house dressed in high-waist jeans, and a long-sleeved blue shirt.

"Monica honey where did you go?" You called out to her.

She paused upon hearing your voice, and her heart swelled from the adoring look in your eyes. You were so in love for her, but none of it was real. She wished it was.

"You've been gone for a few days. you missed the fall festival did I do something wrong?" You blinked away a few tears as your smile wavered. You were hurt and confused by her disappearance.

Monica told herself back then what she was about to do was completely necessary. There was no harm in keeping the charade going as she wasn't sure of what would happened. If you came to your senses right now. You needed reassurance so that's what she gave you.

"Oh sweetheart you did nothing wrong you could never." Monica said turning back around to close the distance, and take your face in her hands. "You're perfect y/n God you're so freaking perfect I don't deserve you." Her words became more and more sincere as she went on her voice dripping with love.

"Monica-"

She cut off your words with her heartfelt kiss an arm gripping your waist as you melted. Her lips melded perfectly against yours just like all the other times. She pulled away slowly panting with her emotions running high. "I love you. I'll always love you y/n never doubt that okay."

You nodded touching your forehead too hers.

The memory came to an end only for another wave of them to hit. Your grip on her hand was so tight now her hand had gone numb. The two of you dancing in the house. Monica twirling you around by the hand with a happy smile. You climbing into bed with her snuggling up to her until her arms opened. A few more slipped through as Carol and Kamala stayed silent through it all.

"Enough of this." Monica cried tearing her hand free from yours to rip the head piece off bringing the session to an end.

You followed suit eyes flying open to find the spot beside you vacant. Monica was already headed to the the back of the ship.

"Um I'm just going to go stare into space." Kamala said not meeting your eyes. The young girl went over to the pilot seat.

"Don't touch anything Kamala I'll be over in a second" Carol yelled.

"Okay Captain" she replied.

Carol figured she'd start with you first blocking your path to the ship's hangar. "You need to go talk to her."

"She ran away before I could or did you not see that. She's been running from me for nearly a year now Carol" You argued.

"Well maybe it's time you start chasing her y/n." Carol shot back not backing down.

You threw your hands in the air with a humorless chucke. "As if it would make a difference Monica has been avoiding this conversation since Wanda's hex. There is no point even if I corner her she's not going to tell me the truth. I've tried, and all she does is dance around the topic. Until I drop it, you think I enjoy living like this. It sucks not having her around anymore. I went from seeing every single day to once every blue moon." You slammed your hand down on her work table, making it tremble. "Why don't you go try?"

Carol didn't stop you from walking past her this time, noting the watery eyes. She made her way over to Monica, sitting on the floor with her back against the wall. Out of view from the rest of you. She sensed Carol's presence the second the blonde woman walked into the space, and let out a sigh of exasperation.

Carol held up a hand to stop her protesting before she could a word out. "Don't tell me you're fine and nothing is wrong. That's a lie and both us of know it."

"Fine how about I don't want to talk about it" Monica grumbled.

"That's not a luxury you have at this point whatever is going is clouding your judgement right now. A teenage girl has been entrusted into our care, and we made a promise to get her back home in one piece. Which means next time we go into field you and y/n's heads need to be on straight." Carol gave her no other choice sliding down against the wall into a sitting position right next too her. Monica scooted over with a huff.

"Why don't you start from the beginning this time" Carol suggested.

"I was a complete wreck when I came back from being blipped. Just thrown back into the world so different than when I left. My mother was dead, and I never got the chance to say goodbye. On top of that I lost five years of my life, and then I have to hear how Captain Marvel swooped down from space to save the day in the fight with Thanos. I waited for you Carol." Monica paused lifting her head to look Carol in the eyes letting her see the tears gathered in hers.

She realized this wasn't just about dealing with her emotions for you, but was the much needed therapy session about Carol abandoning her for all those years. "I returned to mom's old home in Louisiana hoping you'd show up at some point. I told myself you were going to come back and apologize. Help me get through what happened, but you never did."

"Monica" Carol whispered her name with guilt laced in her voice. "I was bus-."

"Don't you dare" Monica cried the tears not falling from her eyes. "Don't you dare use the same old excuse I was too busy saving the universe. If we're going to have this conservation I want the truth. You want me to be honest about y/n then you're gonna have to be honest with me. Why didn't you ever come back before Thanos?" She fell silent with hardened eyes determined to get an answer.

How did the topic switch from you to her? Monica was like a daughter too her, and she knew she owed the younger woman answers for her absence all those years. But honestly Carol was hoping she'd be able to avoid the conservation a little longer. She wished they could just skip it, and an apology would suffice. But it was obvious Monica wasn't going to let that happen. She wanted an explanation.

"Okay fine you deserve the truth so I'll give it too you" Carol agreed. Letting a few minutes past by before continuing she needed to find the right words.

"Carol come on."

"I did a lot of bad things okay" Carol blurted out.

Monica furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "What."

The blonde woman looked away not wanting to her surrogate daughter’s eyes anymore as she went on. "I know people think heroes can do know wrong, and even when we do. It was necessary or just a mistake, but that's not always true. I acted recklessly trying to fix a problem and only made things worst. The Kree call me the Annihilator and I hate that name with a passion because I deserve it Monica. I destroyed their home, their way of life, and then spent years punishing them for my mistake. I felt guilty and ashamed that's why I stayed away for so long. You looked up to me more than anything. Maria told me that no matter how many heroes there were I'd always be your favorite. I couldn't face you knowing I didn't deserve your admiration anymore."

A single tear escaped sliding down her face Carol acted fast too wipe it away. An arm wrapped around her shoulder, and Monica pulled her in coaxing Carol into dropping her head on her shoulder. She rested her own head on top of her childhood hero's. "Don't be ridiculous Carol you had no way of knowing that your actions would lead to all this. You were just trying to help which is all we can ever do. Sometimes we get it right and other times we get it wrong. No one is perfect." Her words brought peace to Captain Marvel's heart as the weight of her mistakes finally vanished. She couldn't stop the rest of the tears if she wanted to, so Carol just left them fall. The two of them stayed like that a little longer basking in their reconciliation.

"Y/N was the one who got me through it all" Monica finally whispered. Her arm tightening around Carol's shoulder. "She was like this bright star shining my dark and starless world. A beacon of hope bringing me back to life giving me reassurance every step of the way. That somehow I'd be okay again. I'd smile and it would be real one day. It was impossible for me not to fall for her you know."

"So what happened that led to this? Did it start in the hex?" Carol questioned.

"No it was before the hex originally they sent me out on the mission alone, but then Fury asked y/n too tag alone. He was still worried about me. I didn't know what we were walking into, but I had this weird feeling. After everything I lost I wasn't going to risk walking into danger without her knowing the truth. So I kissed her before we left for the mission." Monica took a deep breath pulling her arm away to bury her face into her hands.

Carol rubbed her back trying to give her some comfort. "And" she prompted not wanting to lose her now.

"She pushed me away" Monica whispered. "I knew right then she didn't feel the same. So I ran not wanting to give her the chance to formally reject me. I wouldn't have been able to handle it, and I still don't know if I can Carol."

"Moni-"

"No I don't think you get it every moment between us in that hex felt real, and it felt right to me. Sometimes I wonder if I could've broken free earlier than I what I did, but deep down I knew being with her in that capacity was the closest I'd ever get to being with her. So I let myself stay under mind's control on purpose. And for y/n when she came out she probably felt so violated. That moment when I went back into the hex I never thought she would find out about it. I confessed my love to her because I knew it'd stay between me and Wanda."

Thanks to the memory-sharing device you saw it, and knew the truth. How was she supposed to face now? The idea of discussing the events of the hex terrified her before. Now it seemed like an impossible feat.

"You run from her because you're afraid your truth is too much for her." Carol started pausing for a deep breath, and to lift Monica's head by the chin to catch her eyes. "But the more you run from her, the more you hurt her, and that I do understand."

Monica sighed as a whole conservation passed between her, and her surrogate aunt just by eyesight.

"I'm not going to force you to talk to her now, but please don't make her wait too much longer." Carol let Monica get settled against her again. The two of them staying there for just a little longer.

A Few Hours Later

The ship finally touched down at the landing port in Aladna, and despite Carol's weird behavior about the unfamiliar planet. Monica couldn't get off fast enough eager to escape being within close quarters with you. She promised Carol that after the four of you succeeded with stopping Dar-Benn and retrieving the second bangle. She'd sit down and have a much-needed conservation with you even if heartbreak was the end result.

That was her plan. Too bad you were done waiting around.

Carol walked the ramp with explaining to Kamala how things worked on Aladna. Monica hung back searching for you, and just when she thought maybe you had already exited the ship. You materialized out of thin air leaning up against the wall by the ramp. Arms crossed over your chest with a deadpan expression.

Monica jumped a bit cursing herself for forgetting invisibility was one of your powers. She frowned wondering why you weren't following Carol and Kamala. She got her answer when she took a few more steps forward, and you threw out an arm blocking her path.

"Carol you two go ahead. We'll go catch up" You said catching Monica by the waist as she attempted to go around you. She went still in your hold.

"Sure thing y/n don't take too long." Carol replied ignoring Monica's desperate plea for help. She walked out of sight with a giddy Kamala.

"That's up to you" You told Monica pulling your arm back.

"Y/N we really don't have time for this" she insisted. "We can do this later-"

You cut her off with a scoff. "You say that now but the second this mission is over, and we're back on Earth. You're going to runaway again putting as much distance between the two of us as possible. No more running Mon."

"Okay fine let's get this over" Monica exclaimed throwing her hands in the air. She turned around walking back into the center of the ship. "Go ahead and tell me how much you don't want to be with me, since you're so ready to reject me." She was yelling now with tears falling down her face.

You regarded her with sympathy as your face softened. "Oh Monica" you whispered right behind her. Her back was still you as she refused to turn around. "Monica look at me please" You tried again.

"No" she murmured.

You ran a hand through your hair with a sigh of exasperation. "There you go again assuming things. That's what got us here in the first place you know. You assumed I was going to reject you after that first kiss."

Monica glanced over her shoulder with a raised eyebrow. "You eavesdropped" she accused offended.

"Not me" You said. "More like a bored sixteen-year old teenager who was left to entertain herself alone far too long."

Kamala came bounding over to the work table you were sitting at tinkering with some machine-part. Rambling how she didn't mean to listen in on Carol and Monica's private conservation, but she was searching for the bathroom. The young girl just happened to walk past the two of them talking and like any other teenager couldn't resist juicy gossip. She continued on saying it wasn't right for her to repeat anything she heard back to you, but then again it'd be a crime for her not to. Because Kamala was sure you and Monica were meant to be, so she was just doing her duty making sure you had all the necessary information. Then she finally told you what she heard before you could stop her. You didn't get a single word in during the entire encounter.

"I'm going to kill her" Monica muttered.

"Her parents won't like that, and her mom kind of scares me so you're on your own if you do." Neither of you could resist the urge to chuckle.

"What did you mean? You're telling me I'm supposed to believe there was going to be a different outcome. After you pushed me away when I kissed you."

Your smile faltered with Monica getting the conservation back on track. "Monica I wasn't rejecting you which you would've known if you gave me time to explain."

"Then what was it?"

"I pushed you away because the timing didn't feel right to me. I mean of course I had feelings for you. Still do in fact" You were quick to correct yourself. "I just wanted to be sure you felt the same for me, and wasn't trying to use me as a distraction."

Monica went through a plethora of emotions through your confession. Hurt when referred to your feelings in the past tense. Relief when you made it clear those feelings were still present. Last confusion when you dared to say she would do something so sick in her eyes. After everything she'd been through in her life the idea of hurting you in such a way made her sick to her stomach. "Why would you think that?"

"Monica" You spoke her name softly moving so you were standing in front of her now. Bringing a hand to rest upon her cheek smiling when she didn't pull away. "You were battling so many emotions back then between the grief of your mother's death, and the resentment from Carol's abandoning you. I didn't know if there was enough room for you to love me, or if you were just looking for an escape from the crushing burdens. If you had given me the chance I would've told you to give it time. After the mission was over we could take sometime to ourselves, and figure things out."

You stepped back with a light shrug. "But you never gave me a chance, and I thought the hex might've made things easier considering what we went through in there. It just made the situation worse."

Monica stood in the exact same spot as you leaned back into the table behind you awaiting her response. She was stuck in a daze trying to process your words, what they meant, and what was going to happen now.

"So the hex...." Her voice trailed off as she hoped you caught on to what she was asking.

"It was real for me too Mon, and not in a bad way. I just really wished you had waited until I was out before confessing your love for me. I would've said it back."

"Can you say it back now?" Monica said pleading to hear those three words come out of your mouth. God knows she's been dreaming about this day for far too long.

"I love you Monica Rambeau, and I want to be with you more than anything in this world. I know you've been through so much, and hurt one too many times. And while I can't promise anything I do promise to do everything in my power to make sure. I'm never the reason for your pain if you're willing to take the risk." You said with your eyes locked onto hers with so much love in them.

You got your answer when Monica surged forward taking your face in her hands, pressing her lips to yours. In what became a desperate and breath-taking kiss as you matched her urgency wrapping both arms around her waist. Pulling her body to yours till there was no space left between the two of you. Her lips were soft but rough as they moved against yours. You moaned into her mouth letting her tongue slip inside, and it was never a battle as she seemed to let you win. For once in her life Monica was finally given the chance to just step back, and let someone else take control. And who better than the person who put her back together when she fell apart. The person who had been the missing puzzle piece in her life for the past couple of months.

Monica pulled away for a brief second panting pressing her forehead to yours. "I love you too" she breathed pressing another kiss to your swollen lips.

You nodded leaning in to capture them again as she ended it all too soon for your liking. Tightening your hold on her waist you kissed her a bit harder this time.

"Okay wow I really didn't need to see that" Carol's voice came from behind the two of you ruining the moment.

You pulled away too see Carol standing there holding the oversize hat with streamers attached to it in one hand. The other was covering Kamala's eyes. The young girl let out a squeal of excitement.

"Yes this is so going in my fanfiction" she commented.

"Uh no its not" Monica said ripping her lips away from yours, and whipping her head around.

"Please this would make such a good story I'm already thinking of a plot" Kamala pleaded. "I'll change your names."

"No-"

"Sure have at it kid." You gave her your blessing cutting off anymore of Monica's protests with one last parting kiss. She sighed into it with slight irritation.

I guess I owe you a few dates after this huh" Monica stated.

"You owe me more than a few but I'm a forgiving girl under the right circumstances."

Carol let out a low whistle gaining everyone’s attention. "Alright I'm thrilled the two of you were able to figure out your feelings for each other. In the midst of this chaos but we still have a villain to stop, and a planet to save."

"Okay, okay" Monica conceded stepping out of your arms. You followed suit standing up straight again. "Lead the way Captain Marvel."

"Oh and y/n don't think you're getting out of a threatening speech from me about what I'll do. If you hurt her" Carol reminded you pointing a stern finger at you.

You held up your hands in surrender as Monica stood in front of you shaking her head. Her and Carol went into a playful argument walking forward to the ramp. You followed with Kamala by your side holding out her fist for you to bump.

[drdemonprince]

autistic anon here again, thanks for fielding my question, you're a real one for not all toxic positivity on it. i guess i should've formulated things better, because i didn't mean to imply being completely wrapped up in decision paralysis to the point of doing nothing. that's a mental hurdle i've cleared a long time ago, so shit gets done. i have a few emails sitting in my inbox of fundraisers i helped with that closed out, and it;s making me emotional just thinking about it.

there's a weird disconnect between knowing that you're just one person (and that's something i actually like, i'm no-one special, that's a very freeing thought), and fully feeling it. because somewhere there's always a nagging worry i could do more. as true as it is, reminding yourself you're doing what you can feels like a convenient self-soothing lie when you're in the pit of a bad night. probably the calvinist whispering poisons in your ear. (being afraid of falling in the trap of slacktivism or just reposting everything as a signal boost and patting myself on the back for a job well done, amongst them. which is BS, but knowing isn't believing.)

i mentioned the autistic part for a reason, because community is something i've never quite experienced and only understand in the abstract. like those fundraisers i helped with many, many other people, that's a community effort and i'm proud i could contribute my little bit. translating that to in-person efforts has been a big ??? though. it's not very parseable or approachable to me.

i hadn't quite grokked this as all being part of shame, i have your book sitting here and have read it a while, probably should reread it.

Hey, thanks for writing back! I hear from people of all levels of engagement, from having never done anything to like dedicated black bloc hard core mother fuckers so it's hard to gauge from a single message what someone's particular situation is.

It sounds like you are already doing a ton, choosing actions to take, following through on them, reflecting on the impact of your tactics, and then regrouping to do more and to try things differently where you can. Yet you still feel like shit sometimes and as if you're not doing enough. What to do about those feelings?

Well. Consider those feelings aren't a problem you have to fix. They're just a thing that will happen. Because of cultural conditioning and endless exposure to alarming messages and imagery online they're just gonna come up. Those feelings can just exist while you keep doing the damn thing.

You've already got your behavior on lock. You're doing what you can and not succumbing to choice paralysis. You're hopefully not burning yourself out. It doesn't sound like anything needs to change, maybe other than you not consuming too much online bullshit that's making you feel even more guilty needlessly.

You say: "there's a weird disconnect between knowing that you're just one person (and that's something i actually like, i'm no-one special, that's a very freeing thought), and fully feeling it."

Yeah, you might not ever fully feel it. As long as you keep acting like it's true, you're good imo.

i feel like the most evil selfish unlovable human being alive most days. it doesn't really matter that i do. it sucks, but that's just a fact of how my life has been. i can keep picking myself up and doing what i have decided is right for me to do anyway. i do what i can to avoid triggers that make that feeling worse, so that it doesn't become a barrier to action, but otherwise i just... keep on living, with terrible emotions and terrible thoughts. and i focus on my actions.

As for the community piece, I hear you, it's really fucking hard. I think it's very humbling work that is so worth doing though. Often it involves showing up to the work that a group is doing and living with the fact that you won't know what the fuck is going on and looking inept for a while. it's a necessary distress tolerance building exercise, getting more comfortable with just being there and rearranging the chairs and setting up the food and feeling like a dumbass who has nothing to contribute.

being able to sit with those feelings and keep showing up and not having an ego about it is enough to earn a lot of trust and foster deeper connections, I find. so many people fail to be able to even do that in most organizing/activist/volunteering spaces. I understand it feels mortifying but it is another one of those situations of getting over oneself in a way that's ultimately so freeing and beautiful. when you can accept that people want you around even if you never have anything to say and do nothing but bring paper cups and take out the trash. it's a real object lesson in how not being all that important can be a wonderful thing and make it possible for us to find love and acceptance.

[silentglassbreak]

Anonymous

Noah Sebastian x OFC

Here we go.

Warnings: Alcohol abuse, overall abuse, mild violence (ie. bar fights), smut, swearing, and altogether just a lot of fuckery.

+It goes without saying. This is a work of fiction. My words are mine. Plagiarism is a crime.

Taglist: @flowery-mess @lma1986 @myownthoughts12

Part 10 - The Fountain

My hands shook, as I paced back and forth in front of the building, Nick standing with his head hanging.

"Leena I-"

I put a hand up. "Don't."

Nick huffed. "I was going to tell you."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah? When? Back at the house?" I threw my hands up. "Fat lot of good that did us, huh?!"

He shrugged. "Leena, he's my best friend. I couldn't just betray his trust like that."

"You're his fucking sponsor, Nick!" I glared at him, my voice at a level I would usually be embarrassed to scream at. Right now, however, I could not give even a half of a fuck less. "You are supposed to keep him straight!"

"Jesus, fuck, Leena! I tried!" I stopped, staring at him. "He was sneaking the fucking drinks! I didn't catch him until I tracked him down at a bar last weekend!"

"What?"

He was standing, his arms held up in defense. "He disappeared one night after a show, and I had to check his location. He was at a bar, kicking back shots. The only reason he agreed to leave was because you called him!"

I thought back. "When was this?"

"Thursday night."

The pieces started forming in my mind. His muffled words, his confrontational attitude. Not calling me as often…

I raised an eyebrow. "He told me you guys were out celebrating someone's birthday."

He shook his head. "He never went with us to those anymore. Him and I would just go back to the hotel." He sighed hard, putting his hands in his sweater pockets. "He admitted to me that he started having a few drinks when he was alone in his room each night, after we left again on tour."

My eyes bulged. "Did he say why?"

He only shook his head. "Said he had it under control, and it wouldn't be like last time."

"Last time?"

Nick sighed. "Look, you should talk to him."

I scoffed. "Oh yeah, cause he's obviously very honest with me!"

Nick looked down. "It's not my story to tell, Leena."

"It is now."

He walked over to the bench, taking a seat and looking up at me. I followed suit.

"He just...he was bad before." He stared off in another direction, looking lost in his head. "Performing drunk, forgetting lyrics, it was getting out of hand. It was getting harder to hide."

I kept quiet, giving him room to speak.

"Then, the pandemic hit, and it only got worse." He looked at me, then. "Noah's got a lot of demons, Leena. And he's been through some shit in his life. His way of coping was drowning it out in a bottle."

"Nick, what happened? What made him finally want to stop?"

He sighed, looking away from me again and staring at his shoes.

"We picked up a gig. Well, he picked up a gig. He didn't tell us until the night of. Me, Jolly, and Folio all tried to talk him out of it. He had been on a 2-week bender, and we figured it couldn't go well."

I stared at him, watching his face change while he recalled the memory.

"He insisted. It was a small venue, small show, what could happen?" He paused, biting his lip. "After the show, we went out to celebrate, as we always did. And Noah, he just, he wouldn't let the fuck up. Shot after shot, beers in between."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "I'm not sure if you know this, but the guy's a real jackass when he drinks."

I nodded. "I've gathered that."

"He's like a whole different dude. Well, there was this guy at the bar. He was shit talking, trying to hit on Lily. Noah snapped, started a brawl. He wasn't going to back out, so we all had to get involved, try to break it up."

"The bartender came over to help break up the fight. She was probably as tall as you."

My heart sunk. This wasn't going anywhere good.

"I'm sure he didn't mean to do it, he was blacked out." He looked straight at me. "She ended up in the hospital, bad concussion, fractured wrist, pretty rough shit."

"He hit her?"

Nick shook his head. "Not intentionally. She just kind of got in the way. He wasn't paying attention. Knocked her out in the process."

I was staring at Nick, seeing the pain on his face.

"I don't want this for him, Leena. I want him to quit drinking. But Noah, he's a different animal entirely. I don't know if I can handle sponsoring him."

I nodded. "I understand, Nick. I'm sorry."

"Hey."

The rasped voice made us both whip our heads around. An absolutely hellish looking Noah stood about fifteen feet away, hood over his head, hands in his pockets. He looked nearly asleep still, eyes squinted in the sunlight.

We both stood, Nick walking over to him first.

“Man, what the fuck did you do?”

Noah was staring at me, eyes boring into my head. I returned with a glare of my own.

“What I had to.”

-

Pulling into the driveway of their home, I heard Noah groan from the back seat.

“I think my fucking truck got towed.”

Noah had slept the entire ride back to Calabasas. This was the first time we heard his voice since we left OCDC. I had been sitting, stewing, planning all the ways I was going to lash out at him.

Once the wheels came to a stop, however, I lost my nerve and opened the door. I hopped out onto the pavement, and beelined for my own truck. I heard a car door slam behind me, and footsteps chasing.

“Leena, wait!”

I spun on my heel, letting any rage I had come through my eyes, blazing into him. He visibly flinched backward, still at least six feet behind me.

“Don’t you fucking dare, Noah Sebastian!” I pressed my key fob to unlock the doors.

“I did it for you, you know!” This made me freeze, car door half open. I grit my teeth and slammed the it closed.

My feet marched directly in front of him, staring up at his insanely tall form.

“Are you kidding me?! You were arrested, Noah! You got fucking wasted, and beat Sam to a bloody pulp for…what? To save me?!” I threw my hands up, a demented smile twisting my face. I let my hands come together, slow clapping.

“Well! My fucking hero!” I took another step toward him, pressing a finger into his chest. He took a step back in response.

"No, let me tell you what you actually fucking did. You started drinking again, behind Nick's back!" Poke in the chest.

"You fucking drank yourself belligerent and took out some bravado-ass vigilante justice on some dirtbag piece of shit who isn't even fucking worth it!" Poke.

"You got arrested, jeopardized not only your own reputation, but your friends' as well." Poke.

"And on top of all of that, you fucking lied to me about all of it!" That last statement earned him a good, old-fashioned shove to the gut.

"God damn it Noah! I warned you not to fucking lie to me!"

He stood there, absolutely motionless, his face hard but his eyes pleading. He fucked up. And now, thanks to my outburst, he fucking knew it.

I took a hard breath, closing my eyes to re-center my thoughts. I looked back at him, seeing he was trying to take a step forward.

I put my hand up, stopping him. "Noah," I felt the familiar sting in my eyes. "this is over."

That's when I saw the panic flood his face. "No, Leena, wait-"

I shook my head. "I can't, Noah. I just can't."

He reached out, snatching one of my hands, too quick for me to pull away. "Please, Leena. Please, don't do this."

I saw his eyes welling up, making it harder for me to hold back the tears now threatening to spill out of my own.

"I have to go." I looked down, unable to hold back anymore. My voice cracked. "I can't do this."

"Leena, baby, I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say. Tell me what to say? Please, baby." His hand pulled mine, and I caught a glimpse of his knuckles. On top of his tattoos, his skin was broken, bloodied, and mangled. Dried blood covered the skin, and his fingernails were filthy.

I squeezed my eyes closed. "Noah, there's no fixing this."

"Leena," His voice was a whisper. "please. I can't lose you."

I wiped at my face, slipping my hand out of his grasp.

"You already did."

-

3 Months Later

The packing tape made such an awful sound when it screeched over the top of the box. I sighed, pushing the box to the side and used my Sharpie to label it. 'Bedroom'.

Angel sat next to me, eyeing the men walking in and out of the room.

"Guys, this is the last box." I pushed it toward them and smiled as one of them came over and picked it up.

I stood off the floor, surveying the room. Laura skipped in from the hallway.

"Okay, so all of the furniture, and half the boxes are loaded. I talked to Enzo, and we are right on schedule to have the truck take off by 2PM. After that, I think we should grab lunch?" I nodded at her.

"We can drop Angel at your place first?"

She walked over, petting the top of his head. "Of course."

I grabbed my purse off of the bathroom counter, making sure I had everything I needed.

"You're staying with me until when, again?"

I had to think for a moment. Days were easy to lose track of.

"Sunday. Then I fly out to Seattle."

She nodded. "You sure you can't just move in with me? I don't think I can handle you being away for so long."

I chuckled. "It's only six months, babe. I'll be back before you know it."

"I know, but renting out your house seems a little extreme."

I waved her off, stepping through the threshold, Angel in tow.

"Nah, I'll get an apartment when I get back."

After breaking off my relationship, I had to take a step back and make some changes. Life was just too stressful the way it was. I needed something different.

I promptly drafted my resignation to Kline Home Lending, effective immediately. I then called my Dad, giving him the entire rundown of the prior weeks, telling him I needed to find a way to get away. He told me to take some time off, and go stay with him for a while.

That was about as much convincing as I needed.

Noah had tried to reach out many times, but that feathered out after about a month, my message evidently coming through pretty clearly. I kept in decently close contact with Nick, however. I broke up with him, but I would be lying to myself if I said I didn't still think about him every single day. I worried about Noah.

Nick had told me that thankfully, Sam didn't press charges, and he was given probation for a year, which included required anger management, therapy, and regular sobriety tests. I was glad to hear that. He was complying, and I knew from speaking with Abel, that he was once again attending AA. He had already earned a new 60-day coin. My heart swelled when I heard.

"Leena?" Laura caught my attention, making me realize I hadn't responded to something she said as she drove to the restaurant.

"Sorry, what?"

She shook her head. "Where are you right now?"

I chuckled. "Sorry, my mind was on something else. What did you say?"

She peered at me from the side of her eyes. "I asked if it was okay if Nick joined us for lunch? He mentioned that he wanted see you before you left."

I smiled. "Oh, yeah of course. I haven't seen him in...a while."

I hadn't seen Nick since that day. The last time I saw Noah.

We pulled in to the restaurant about twenty-minutes later, Nick standing outside of his truck, waving at us as we pulled in.

"Hey!" I jumped out of Laura's car, and Nick wrapped me in a hug. I squeezed him tight, genuinely happy to see him.

"How are you doing?"

I sighed, a weak smile on my face. "I'm managing. How about you?"

He nodded and looked to Laura, who rounded the corner. "No complaints."

Laura hugged Nick, and we entered the small cafe.

Lunch was easy, comfortable. I put down a BLT sandwich quickly, chatting with Nick about their upcoming European tour dates.

"Where are you most excited to play?"

He smiled, munching on a fry. "Definitely Germany. The crowds out there are the best!"

"Oooh, I would die to see Paris!" I cooed, sipping my sweet tea.

"We'll be there in February!"

"So jealous." I tossed a straw paper at him, earning a fry tossed back at me in return.

Nick took a bite of his burger, and promptly wiped his face with his napkin. "Mm, Laura?"

She turned her attention to him between bites of salad.

"You're coming to the show tomorrow night, right?"

I eyed her suspiciously. She looked caught, a sheepish grin on her face. "Uhm..."

I raised an eyebrow. "Are you?"

She nodded slowly, and I scoffed. "Uh, did you think about mentioning that, maybe?"

She turned to Nick for help, who averted his eyes.

"I was going to mention it...today?" She smiled, guilty.

I gave her an annoyed whine. "Laura!"

"What? Leena, it's free Bad Omens tickets! Whenever I want! How am I supposed to say no?!"

I shrugged. "Fucking fangirl."

This caused her and Nick to both chuckle.

"Leena, why don't you come?"

I stopped mid-drink and deadpanned at him. "Uh...let me count the reasons?"

He rolled his eyes. "Noah doesn't have to know. You can sit in VIP, where he won't bother to look?"

I shook my head. "Thanks, but no thanks. This has been hard enough without listening to him serenade me." I feigned awe. "Voice of an angel, and all."

Nick snickered. "Alright, well let me know if you change your mind."

Laura had driven us back to her house, where I promptly got into my own vehicle and headed to AA. It would be my last meeting until I got back in July, so I wanted to get my goodbyes in now.

I was running late, five minutes past 6PM, and shuffled quickly into the building. When I entered the door, an explosion of voices hollered at me, causing me to stop, stunned.

"Bon Voyage!" Everyone's voices unanimously cheered. The room was decorated with balloons, banners, streamers, and random party decor. The table was covered in treats ranging from cookies, brownies, donuts, and a massive cake in the middle with 'We'll Miss You' scripted on the top.

"Guys! Oh my gosh! You didn't need to do all of this!"

One by one, all of my group members came up for hugs. Abel, then Roger. Seth and Jackson. Syd squeezed me the tightest, looking a little misty and claiming she would come find me if I wasn't back here the day I promised to be.

It was the last person who made me stop dead in my tracks. Noah stood, tall and clean. His hair was combed, freshly cut. He wore a black hoodie, black jeans, and bright red Vans. His hands were in his pants pockets, and he looked nervous.

His smile was big, his eyes bright and clear. It was the best I had seen Noah since I met him. He looked straight, sober. I couldn't help but crack and grin when he held his arms out, inviting a hug.

"I guess you can pass, if you want. I just figured-" But I couldn't help it, I walked over and pressed into him with more force than I intended.

His arms wrapped me tightly, and I inhaled the scent of his cologne, woodsy and fresh. He held me longer than we should've, but the warmth that burst in my chest gave me some of the only solace I felt in months.

He finally released me, pulling back.

I beamed brightly at him. "You look amazing, Noah!"

He rubbed the back of his neck, his nerves obvious. "Yeah, well, I've been working on a lot."

I nodded at him, my hands still holding his arms. "It shows. Good for you, I'm proud."

He locked eyes with me, his dark irises piercing me. He didn't speak, he just smiled, and I felt my feet threatening to melt right into the floor.

Group was informal today, mostly just everyone asking me what my plans were. What I planned to do up in Washington for six months, what my plans were when I got back, etc. I spent the entire hour in one of the best moods I had been in for so long. It was exhilerating.

Noah didn't say much, just watching me intently, listening to everything I said.

It wasn't until after, when Abel insisted I let him clean up, and I was walking the remaining desserts out to my car, that he caught up with me.

"Leena?" I turned around, and smiled at him again. "Hey, I uh," He kicked at the ground, clearly struggling to speak. "I was wondering..."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Yes?"

"Were you going to be at the show tomorrow, by chance?" He couldn't quite look at me. I leaned back against my truck.

"Yeah, Nick mentioned that." He looked up at me then. "I don't think I can make it, though. I'm sorry."

His face fell. "Oh." He nodded. "Right, yeah, I'm sure you're busy, with the move and everything."

I sighed. "Well, the move is mostly finished. I just," I looked away from him. "I don't think I can."

"What do you mean?"

I laughed then, disbelieving that he didn't understand. "Noah, it hasn't been easy for me."

He just held his lips together in a tight line.

"I..." I trailed off, not quite sure how far I wanted to go with this. "I fucking miss you, Noah. That's kind of the problem. I need to get some distance."

His eyes held something in them I didn't recognize. Hope, maybe? I couldn't let my mind go there.

"I miss you too, Leena. So much."

I bit my lip. My brain was firing on all cylinders. I was making a fucking mistake somewhere, I could feel it.

"Look," He looked back up at me. "let me think on it, okay?"

He smiled then, a small, innocent thing. "Okay."

I left him with that, fear that I may do something I regret if I didn't leave now.

I hopped into my truck and drove down the road toward Laura's, Noah's face flashing in my brain over and over. His words.

'I miss you, too, Leena.'

'So much.'

I was parked in her driveway, running it through my head over and over. The warmth of his hug, the smell of his shirt, the look in his eyes.

God damn it.

I pulled out my phone, opening my thread with Nick.

Me: Still got that ticket?

-

I sat back on the lounger, trying not to seem too obviously drinking in the show around me. Laura stood up at the rail, singing every word. I watched Noah dance around the stage, sauntering with all the confidence in the world. My mouth was dry. My heart was heavy.

That was my guy. Once.

After Death of Peace of Mind, Noah began his usual monologuing, which signaled to me that Just Pretend was coming. I wasn't sure if I could handle that. I intended to head to the bathroom when they performed that one, if only for my own sanity.

However, Noah's speech was a little different this time, making me sit forward on the couch, paying better attention.

"Alright Los Angeles. We appreciate you guys coming out here tonight." The crowd applauded heavily. He walked up onto the riser, and sat down, legs hanging off the stage.

"I wanted to chat with you guys for a moment, and get some stuff off my chest, if I could?" He was met with an explosion of cheering.

"Thank you, I appreciate it." He waved the crowd down.

"Now listen, there's something I need you all to know." He went silent, his head staring down at his microphone. He lifted it, and looked directly into the crowd. "I'm an alcoholic."

For the first time in the entire night, the crowd was dead silent. Pins dropping everywhere.

In his nervous state, Noah stood up. He laughed lightly, and walked back over to the mic stand. "Yeah, heavy, I know."

"Here's the thing, I made a decision a while ago that I needed to get sober. And if you have an addiction, you know that getting well is the hardest God damn thing you'll ever do." This was met with applause.

"Today, I re-earned my 90-day sobriety chip." He held his hand in the air, the blue coin twinkling under the lights.

The crowd erupted. I was mesmerized.

He put the coin back in his pocket, and turned his attention back to the crowd.

"Now, the reason I tell you this, is because this journey for me has been anything but easy. 91 days ago, I had fallen off the wagon so bad, I concussed myself." His eyes then peered up into our booth. I saw his eyes look dead into mine. "And in doing so, I lost the love of my life."

The crowd 'awed' and 'oohed', but he didn't take his eyes off of me.

"So this next song I want to play, isn't what I'm supposed to play next."

He sighed heavily. "I wrote this song, a very long time ago."

Folio began a slow, heavy bass drum beat. Woodwind sounds came though the speakers.

"At the time that I wrote it, it didn't have as much meaning, but today, as I stand here before you, it means everything to me."

He finally tore away his stare. "If you know the words, sing it with me. If it means something to you."

I gripped the railing, watching him replace his mic on the stand, and swallowing hard.

"This is The Fountain."

The crowd cheered. Noah's voice rang out, an utterly sad sound.

"What will I have left, when even the hurt is gone? And I can't feel a thing?"

I was frozen.

"Would you had been there, when I came home? Could you hold on another day?"

"I wish I had not held, held on to you so long, but I was just so damn afraid."

"I wish I hadn't used you to pull me out of this dark and lonely place."

The song paused, only the sound of synthetic rhythms coming through.

"I had the whole damn world, and I gave it all away. What did I think I would save?"

"For better or for worse, this is my burden to take. Cause I'm the only one to blame."

"You're so much better off with nothing but memories of, memories of my face."

"Because I have no use, now that you're gone. And now I'm running out of faith."

His voice was stronger. The feeling beating through my chest.

"Together we will live forever."

"I'm not afraid anymore."

All of them sang now.

"Forever."

"I'm not afraid anymore."

"We will live forever."

-

I was tearing through the crowd at an alarming pace. Laura was barely keeping up with me, calling after me. I couldn't stop. I was electric, the feeling under my skin absolutely boiling.

When I reached the security guards, I lifted my VIP badge and waited for them to open the door. I burst through, pacing down the long hallway toward the green room.

"Leena, where are you going?!"

"I've got to find that bastard!"

I burst through the door, startling the few people on the other side. My eyes scanned the room, locking on Nick and Jolly, Folio nearby.

I stomped over to them, absolutely raging. "Where is he?!"

Nick looked absolutely terrified. "He's, uh..."

"Looking for me?" I spun, seeing him standing with his hands kneading together, gloves still in place.

"You!" I walked up to him, his hands coming up in defense. "Who do you think you are?!"

He furrowed his brow.

"Excuse me?"

I took a few steps toward him. This time, he didn't step back. He only broadened his shoulders and stared me down.

"You go out there, and dedicate a God damn song to me? To us?!"

He smirked. Actually fucking smirked.

"I did."

"Ugh! Who do you think you are?!"

"You already asked me that."

"And you didn't answer!"

Everyone was staring at us now.

"I think that I'm the guy who wanted to make a God damn statement!" This made me roll my eyes, to which he scoffed, unamused. "Jesus, Leena. What do you think? I'd embarrass myself like that, admitting I'm a fucking drunk, just for fun?!"

This made me pause. He did do that. That was huge. That was life-changing.

"So yeah, you can be fucking mad if you want to. But I fucking love you, and I was tired of you not hearing me. So I sang you a God damn song." He narrowed his eyes. "Sorry if you didn't fucking like it."

I laughed, loudly. "Didn't like it?" My eyes stared at him wide. "I fucking loved it!" I threw my hands up in defeat. "That's the problem, Noah."

"The problem?"

I sighed, staring right at him. "I love you."

The words fell out before I could stop them. I didn't intend to say it quite that blatantly, with an audience.

"You do?" His voice was hard, still.

"I do. And I don't know what the fuck to do about that."

His face changed, softening around the edges, and he stepped toward me, a smile playing on the corners of his lips.

"You don't know what to do?"

He invaded my space, making the air impossible to breathe.

I shook my head. "No."

He smiled wider, bringing an arm behind me, pulling me close to him. I couldn't react. I was jelly, completely under the spell.

"Well, for starters,"

He pulled me up to him, dipping his head down, and crashing his lips onto mine. It took me a second to react, but after my brain processed what was happening, my hands reached up to grip the sides of his face, pressing into the kiss.

A few hollers were heard behind us, but we tuned it out. This was us. We were back to us. Where we felt right, where we fit.

My chest exploded, my arms wrapping around his neck. He pulled me close, breaking our kiss, and pressing his forehead against mine.

"Fucking love you, Leena."

"Love you so fucking much, Noah."

-

A/N: There's only one part left, then the epilogue. Thank you for joining me on this journey! Tempted to write a sequel. I love these characters so much. Let me know if you think we should see what life after this looks like for Leena & Noah?

xo

[the-s1lly-corner]

can i req jax x reader angst? o-(-( been brainrotting on this idea for so long now; jax goes a little overboard with his joke or prank and reader gets upset by it.. but he doesnt really approach reader to say sorry for a while because he doesnt really know how to? so it worsens the situation? thank uuu!!!!

Severed ties (jax x reader)

There will be NO!!!! Comfort here!!! I want pain!!

Written this as platonic !!

Not proof read and written on mobile!! Yahoo!!

Honestly I love writing angstier stuff, like

Idk I like exploring the topic and the feelings

Jac in general does not seem like the type of person to apologize. It hurts his pride and ego, and really in his eyes everything he does is "all in good fun", or as a means to entertain... himself, mostly

What, is he supposed to apologize because his little joke made someone upset? That's his thought process, I think. Like unless there are huge consequences or he is actively trying to better himself I really don't think he would give a sincere apology, you know?

Like imma be so real here, I know I usually portray jax as a prankster but so far he's worse than that. He has pushed gangle at least twice (in the pilot, and in her tailer), he stepped on her mask and knowing him I wouldnt be surprised if it was on purpose. He just. Ripped zoobles arm off (like yeah sure it doesnt look like it hurts and it can be reattached, but its the idea that he just disrespects them like that), throwing a bowling ball at kinger, ect ect ect

Like I think I down play how mean jax can be

I think a lot of this is caused by the digital world; given that hes probably gotten way too comfortable with the fact you cant get severely injured in the digital world or hahe any long lasting physical damage, you know?

Anyways onto the actual request

I think it's less likely to happen if this is a romantic relationship because I think at that point in time you guys respect each other enough to not be goofy and communicate stuff. As well as this, this prompts jax to try to tone it down.. can also see this happening if you guys are close friends

So really this can only happen if you guys are only like. Normal level friends, because otherwise jax at least learns remorse and tries to be less. Uehdjcf.. you know?

Like I love jax as a character and I enjoy writing him but I'm realizing just how assholish he is based on the pilot

Honestly to be friends with jax you're going to have to be able to have some kind of tolerance to his more tame everyday stuff... imma be nice and assuming the stuff he does above isnt in his usual league of asshole-ness... or maybe it is? I dunno

But some prank he pulls goes too far, and he laughs at you. Probably takes to down play it if you're actually upset, trying to dismiss it as a good ol fashion joke

If he gives an apology it's a half assed one

This leads to you not talking to him as much anymore, if at all

In fact, you may even go as far as to avoiding him during IHAs

And you know what

At first he thinks you're just being sour over his little practical joke

But overtime as you continue to bold your ground he starts to... actually feel bad

And if he does ever sincerely apologize, its likely two late

That's also assuming you dont abstract before then

God can you imagine that, I mean what's worse? Never being able to apologize because the person is effectively dead, or apologizing and not being forgiven?

I think this would push jax to try to tone down his antics

Like he wont totally stop, but it will definitely go back to the light hearted fun I like to headcannon it being when he first joined the circus.. before it got all.. meaner..

Boredom does terrible things to someone and given that the consequences of losing your mind in this place are huge.. I can't help but understand jax a little, assuming my headcannon is correct

Though again he might just be an asshole

While your friendship may be dead and buried now, at least jax learned a lesson that actions do in fact have consequences

And hopefully it sticks

[puari-vol]

Surrender

I googled "how to undo hypnosis" but I wasn't finding anything useful, in fact I knew thinking about it made it worse, but I couldn't help myself, it was just so tantalizing...no no, not tantalizing, terrifying!

I closed the browser, and rubbed my temples, trying to sort my own thoughts from the ones that weren't supposed to be there. but It was just so hard not to think about her eyes, so pretty I coudln't help but stare, or the smell of her perfume, how it made me feel so dizzy and sleepy, or her voice, the way she just talked me down into a drooling empty mess...

I shook my head vigorously I needed to get out, take a walk, clear my mind...but it was just so hard not to think about it...it was just so easy to surrender, it felt so good to surrender...damn it!

I was walking now, I hopped the cool outdoor air would help me clear my head and make a decision. My phone buzzed and I started reaching into my pocket, then stopped myself. What if it was Her? Could she drop me in a text message? Of course she could, she could do anything to me, I was totally powerless...why did that make me want to check it more? no no...bad don't think about it, don't think...

and yet somehow my phone was in my hand, fingers seeming to work on their own until horrified at my lack of control I was reading a message from...not her, I sighed. was that relief? or disappointment? it was my friend asking where I had gone after the party last night...but I definitely should not think about the party.

and yet as I walked with nothing to occupy myself, I found my mind wandering back to the night before. It was a party in a friend of a friends backyard, I had just about gotten drunk enough to start enjoying myself when she walked up to me. She was small, nearly a whole head shorter than me, not threating in the slightest. I had seen her earlier standing alone in the corner, scanning the room completely expressionless. I remember thinking she didn't even look old enough to drink. But now that she was standing right in front of me, there was something in her eyes...an intensity that made me feel off balance...or maybe it was just the alcohol.

we chatted for a little bit about nothing in particular...or had we? The conversation was hard to remember...she asked me to check her eye shadow, to tell her how it looked, she had me smell her perfume, said it made her dizzy the first time she smelled it, she asked me how it made me feel. she asked me if I was relaxed and I just said, "sure" and she smiled a strange smile. then something distracted me and I looked away for a moment, when I looked back she had stepped closer, only inches away, one hand holding my arm gently

"wanna see something cool?" she said, still smiling

"uh, okay?"

"Good, just listen carefully, it won't work if you don't listen got it? you listening?"

"I'm listening"

"Good, all you have to do is listen and pay attention to my eyes, my eyes are pretty aren't they?"

"Yeah...?"

"Good, you're going to drop soon, you're feeling heavy right? that's probably my perfume, you're body's very relaxed for me now, are you ready? it will only feel like a second, just close your eyes for a moment...and sleep...and awake very good"

I stood up straight, she had pulled on my arm suddenly, pulling me down toward her. my heart was beating fast now for some reason

"What...what just happned?" I stammered pulling away from her a little, she just smiled

"just put you in a little trance, nothing to worry about"

"A trance?"

"Yeah with hypnosis, its fun right?"

"But...what...?

"You seem confused, here let me show you again real quick, it gets easier every time"

before I could say anything she moved in again, hand on my arm, tugging me gently toward her

"Eyes" she said, I found myself looking into hers and she smiled

"soooo good at following instructions, just like last time now, ready? three two one, sleep...that's right just like that, my voice is pushing the thoughts right out of your head, listening so so carefully, very good... remember, easier and easier every time, and awake!"

my eyes opened, we had somehow come inside from the backyard, and were now in a living room that was empty accept for a few sleeping drunk people.

"But...when...how did-"

"Shhhhh, sit down silly"

she pulled me down onto the couch with her

"But you're...I'm not...how are you doing this?"

"Shhhhhhh"

she reached her other hand out and put in on my cheek, I was too bewildered to stop her, away from the music and people I suddenly felt like all of my focus was on her.

"Don't worry about it, there's nothing you can do about it at this point, watch I'm just gonna tell you to close your eyes and Drop, that's right, sooooo easy now to let your mind go blank for me, very good. it feels good doesn't it? surrendering to me? yes it does. next time you drop you're gonna go so deep that you'll stay like that for the rest of the night, then we'll really get to have some fun, coming back, wide awake now"

she was snapping her fingers in front of my face, I was blinked rapidly, my body felt heavy and drowsy, the smell of her perfume was overwhelming. she gently pulled me down until I was lying in her lap, staring up at her beautiful eyes...

"Don't worry now, you're going to love this"

she said running a hand through my hair

"Because I'm going to tell you to love it, You're heads so empty now you could probably just drop yourself don't you think? Since you're so good at following instructions, just look deep into my eyes, and say "I surrender" then you'll be all mine"

I was already lost in her eyes, and her voice made it so hard to think, but my lips moved

"I....ssssurender...."

And that was all I could remember, I had woken up back home alone, with nothing but the smell and a note saying 'see you soon' to prove that it had been anything other than a dream.

I shook myself out of a daze, I had let my head go all fuzzy with the memories and my feet had wandered. I was standing outside of an 24 hour diner and I decided to go inside. I sat at the first available booth, and suddenly realized there was someone already sitting there, in my daze I had just sat down at someone else's table

"S-sorry I didn't see-"

Then my sluggish mind recognized the face smiling back at me and I froze

"good to see you again"

I tore myself away from her eyes and looked down at the table

"H-How did you...find me?"

she giggled

"Find you? I told you to come here silly"

"What? but...when-"

"Last night, of course the first thing I taught you was how to forget things and you are soooo good at following instructions aren't you? but I have so many more wonderful things to teach you...that is if you are accepting my offer?"

"Y-your...your offer?"

"Why do you think I let you go? you said you wanted to think about it, so we agreed to meet here tonight once you had decided...but of course, you wouldn't remember that"

for the first time since this morning I felt some hope, I had though I might never be in control again but...

"You're...giving me a choice?"

"Of course, have you come to a decision? do you need more time?"

I shook my head

"N-no...I've decided"

I risked a glance up at her, she was still smiling waiting for my answer...I suddenly remembered something

"About your offer...yes...I want to move in with you and be your pet...please"

"I'm so glad! we're gonna have so much fun together...but first, you know what you have to do, just look into my eyes and say your magic words"

"I surrender"

[1shcakes]

UIS Chapter 1

When MK came to his senses, he was greeted by a blinding light. He winced, his head pounding.

"Where am I?"

He tried to sit up, but a sudden sharp pain shot through his body.

"Argh! My… my back…"

He could barely move. His body felt heavy, like it was weighed down by some invisible force.

"MK, are you awake?"

The familiar voice echoed in his ears. He knew that voice.

"Macaque?"

"Yes, it's me. Don't worry, you're safe."

Safe? How could he be safe when his whole body hurt?

"What… what happened?"

"You fell, but I caught you. Don't worry, I won't let you get hurt. I won't let anyone else get hurt."

Macaque's voice was calm and reassuring, but his face was full of concern.

"I need you to stay calm. You need to breathe, and focus. You're going to be okay."

"Breathe… and focus.."

As soon as those words left his lips, his vision began to clear.

"Good, good. Just keep breathing, and focus on my voice."

As he regained his senses, the first thing he noticed was a strong smell of incense burning somewhere nearby. Then, the faint sound of a steady heartbeat filled his ears. He blinked, trying to get his bearings. He was lying on a bed, in a dimly lit room. He could make out the faint silhouette of Macaque sitting next to him, watching over him.

"How do you feel?"

"My… my back hurts," he groaned. "It feels like I was stabbed by a bunch of needles."

"You did just suddenly fall unconscious, so it's normal that your back would hurt."

"And the headache.."

"That too."

He rubbed his temples, trying to soothe the throbbing pain.

"Do you remember anything?"

"No. Everything's still a bit hazy. And I gotta say, you're really caring for someone who's usually SO full of himself, Macaque." He nudged his shoulder lightly, trying to add a bit of humor in this… not so fitting situation.

"Hey, watch it," Macaque retorted, but the corners of his mouth quirked up in a smile. "And for the record, I'm only looking out for you because you're the king's favorite. If I let anything happen to you, I'd never hear the end of it."

"You're a real warrior, aren't you?"

"Whatever. Now, let's get you up. We've got work to do."

With a grunt, Macaque pulled MK up, slinging his arm over his shoulder.

"Whoa, easy. Let's take it slow, alright?"

"Yeah, yeah.."

As Macaque helped him get his bearings, the door swung open, revealing a distressed Tang.

"MK! What happened?!"

"Nothing. Just a headache-"

"Pigsy and I were so worried about you! We thought something bad had happened."

"Tang, please calm down. He's fine."

"Fine? He's not fine! He collapsed out of nowhere and hit his head on the table! Plus, look at his arm!"

Tang pointed to the large gash on MK's left arm.

"I'm fine, really. It's just a scratch. Nothing a little bandage won't fix."

"A scratch?! It looks like you were mauled by a wild animal! Come here, let me take a look at it."

"Tang, don't. If what we know about this.. 'infection' is true, we should probably just wrap it in a bandage and leave it alone. And wear gloves, probably."

"Macaque, are you sure? That seems like a rather severe wound, and I'd hate to see it get worse."

"We've seen worse, trust me. It'll be fine."

"I suppose you're right."

Tang sighed and reached into his pocket, pulling out a roll of gauze.

"Here, let me bandage it up."

Macaque carefully wrapped the bandage around MK's wound, tying it securely.

"There, that should do it. Now, MK, don't even think about touching the wound. When 2 days pass, we're going to replace it, alright? You can do this, bud."

"Right.."

Tang watched the exchange with an uneasy expression, but didn't say anything. Instead, he turned his attention back to Macaque.

"What do you mean, you've seen worse?"

"Wukong."

"Ah. Right. I'll, uh… leave you two to it, then."

Tang cleared his throat awkwardly and turned to leave, but before he could, a sudden flash of pain shot through MK's body, causing him to cry out in agony.

"Kid!"

"Ow ow ow ow!"

"What's wrong?!"

"It hurts!"

Macaque quickly moved closer to him, gently placing a hand on his back.

"Stay still, MK. I've got you."

"It hurts everywhere! Oh, god, my head… my arm… it's like something's trying to crawl out of my body…"

Tang watched the scene with horror, his mind spinning with dire predictions.

"This can't be good…"

He swallowed hard and looked over at Pigsy, who stood by his side.

"Pigsy, we have to do something! This can't go on!"

In 'old married couple' fashion, Pigsy held Tang's hand in his own.

"Tang, there's not much we can do. Let Macaque handle it, 'cuz he was there to experience it in the first place. We have to be careful around the kid, it could be worse for us."

"Pigsy! It could be worse for us? Don't you get it? It could be worse for MK! He could be infected like the Monkey King! This isn't some small bug, this is something life-threatening, and you're treating it like it's some common cold!"

"Calm down! We're all going through some stress right now, aight? Don't start shouting like a lunatic when we're trying to focus here."

"I am not shouting! I just don't understand how you can be so calm when our boy's life could be at stake! What if the ink spreads to the point where he's barely even human anymore?! Do you really want to see MK like that?! Huh?!"

"Now listen here-"

"You're being impossible, Pigsy, I can't believe you're doing this!"

"Shut up! I don't need you screaming at me all the damn time, Tang! What the hell am I supposed to do, huh? Do I gotta be all cheerful and hopeful 24/7 now?! 'Cuz let me tell you, I'm not gonna be like that!"

"Pigsy-"

"Don't 'Pigsy' me! I'm not some stupid kid you can just tell to calm down, alright? We're not kids anymore! If you got something to say, you can say it like an adult!"

Tang was about to say something before the distressed screaming of MK cut him off before he could even get a word in.

"Shit." Macaque mumbled to himself, running over to MK and cradling his head as he kept on screaming and squirming in pain.

"What… What the hell do I do, kid?"

MK kept on screaming, not seeming to hear a thing Macaque said, writhing in pain on the bed as if he were possessed by the ink himself.

"Argh! Shut up, kid, shut up!" Macaque shouted, hoping the sound of his voice would break through MK's panic. But his words fell on deaf ears as the screaming continued.

Pigsy and Tang were just about ready to run over to the poor kid to see what was going on with him before he jerked and suddenly sat up, running towards the bathroom.

He was about to vomit, but it was too late.

MK fell down onto the floor and threw up a pile of black sludge onto the tiles.

---

Mei lay in her bed, scrolling through her phone. Her fingers swiped lazily through social media posts.

"Hmm. Nothing interesting going on in Monkiegram right now.. might go to MK's place and play Monkey Mech with him."

Mei sighed as she tossed her phone onto her nightstand. The glow of the screen dimmed, leaving the room in a soft, ambient light.

She shifted in her bed, the thoughts of the mundane scrolling through social media not providing the distraction she craved.

With a sudden decision, she pushed herself up and off the bed, the plush carpet under her feet muffling her steps as she made her way to the door.

---

The sun shone brightly through the window, painting the entire world in a vibrant orange hue.

As Mei stepped outside, she inhaled deeply, taking in the freshness of the morning air as she walked briskly along the pavement.

"Wow. It smells great out here today.."

She paused momentarily, closing her eyes as she inhaled deeply again. A breeze tickled her face, making her feel relaxed and refreshed.

Suddenly, her stomach grumbled loudly, reminding her that she hadn't eaten since breakfast the day before.

"Oh, man, I haven't had lunch yet, have I? Well, good thing I'm headed towards ol' Pigsy's, might snag a bowl from Tang if I'm lucky! Mmm, I can just imagine the smell of the noodle soup!"

Feeling energized from walking, Mei picked up the pace, hurrying towards Pigsy's store.

As she rounded the corner, however, she came to a stop as she saw the "CLOSED" sign at the noodle shop. Mei couldn't help but stare blankly at the sign before her, her brow furrowed in confusion. She looked back and forth between the shop and the sign a few times, trying to figure out why no one was inside.

After looking around a bit more, she shrugged and began to walk away from the shop before she heard a loud clattering sound coming from MK's apartment, which was on top the shop.

"Wait, what? Did someone break in!?"

Without hesitation, Mei dashed towards the entrance of the shop, only to find the door locked, and a piece of paper taped neatly to the glass. She removed the piece of paper and read it, noticing that it read "Sorry. Please come back tomorrow".

Mei crumpled up the paper and tossed it somewhere without a second thought. Maybe Pigsy wouldn't mind anyway. Then she kicked the door open using a trick she saw online.

"Hey! Hey, Pigsy? Are you in there?"

She glanced around the shop, finding nothing else to indicate that anyone was home.

"Um… hello?" She called out, raising her eyebrows in concern. "Is anybody here?"

No response.

With that, Mei decided to look around further. As she passed the counter, she could hear muffled arguing from upstairs. Curiosity getting the better of her, she crept up the stairs until she reached the hallway, peering into the first door she came across. Inside, she found Macaque kneeling on the ground, his arm around MK as he dry-heaved.

As soon as he saw Mei, he raised his head with a frightened expression.

"Mei. Don't come any closer."

"Eh? Why not?"

"Just stay back please… I, uh…. I'll explain everything later. Just keep back, okay? You shouldn't see this kind of stuff."

"But, but I wanna know what's going on!"

"I said I'll explain later! Just stay back!"

Mei frowned. "Fine. But I swear if you hurt my friend or anything, I will personally shove this sword where the sun don't shine."

Macaque let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you. And don't do that."

"Yeah yeah… Whatever. Now, are you going to give me answers, or what?"

"I promise, I'll tell you everything."

"I hope so."

The two remained silent for a while as Macaque patted MK's back while MK was suffering.

"O-Okay, I think I'm done…" MK sighed, wiping his mouth with the back of his wrist.

"Are you feeling better? How are your symptoms? Can you tell me?"

"Better, yeah. My throat still hurts though. And my body feels weak…"

"That's to be expected, considering what happened to you yesterday. Also, Mei's here to visit you."

Mei waved awkwardly at MK, who gave her a warm smile.

"Now, Macaque? Care to explain what happened to my best friend? Or are you not telling me something important?"

"Ah… well, I… actually have a lot of explaining to do, if you want to hear it."

"It must have been pretty bad, if you're acting like this."

Cue Macaque catching Mei up on everything. From the events leading up to it, to what happened after they left the dojo, to their current situation. The story ended with them sitting in silence, contemplating everything that had been said.

Macaque was the first one to speak up again.

"So, what do you think? Do you believe us now?"

"… I honestly don't know, Mac."

Next

[lunarspiral1127]

Alright, now let's actually talk about X-Men 97 episode 9 *SPOILERS ALSO SOME RANTING INCOMING*

The results of Magneto's worldwide blackout

Uh, I think Magneto's omega level moment to stop the Prime Sentinels and the Spider-Man cameo got me distracted on what his EMP also did to the world, which is not good.

Yeah, so thousands have died because of this, mutants are being hunted down more than ever, and the world's gonna end in less than 12 hours. So....Magneto made things worse for everybody, mutants and humans.....god dammit.

So, because of this Magneto is also something to deal with as well as Bastion (even though this was all Bastion's fault and the mastermind behind everything, including the massacre, but okay 😒). This means he's back to being an enemy, which I don't like. He was doing good as a protagonist, and just for him to revert back to being an antagonist again?! I mean, I get why, I just don't like it. Even when, again, BASTION IS RIGHT THERE!!! *sigh* I guess with the time limit, they gotta deal with both of them and fix Earth.

Asteroid M again? Didn't Magneto try this before back in the previous show, and it backfired? In fact, he only recruited two others, which I'll get to later. Why isn't he saving more of his kind and bring them to Asteroid M? Maybe he just started and went to the X-Men first before going to find and rescue other mutants Yeah, as you can tell, I'm liking where this is going for Magneto.

Storm and Forge

THANK GOD SHE'S BACK! AND SHE'S BACK IN THE INTRO WITH HER BLACK OUTFIT TOO, I MISSED HER SO MUCH! 😭

Jubilee and Jean hugging her at different times was so nice. And, Beast and Forge greeting each other was nice too. Gotta cling to the good moments cause things get bad....REAL BAD.

More of Storm and Jean's sisterhood which was sweet. But, did they let her know about Nate being Cable and that it was Madelyn, a clone, that she interacted with during that timeskip before she left? Cause I feel like Storm needs to know about that.

As bummed out as I was that the two wouldn't confront either Sinister or Bastion, I do understand why. Storm's powers are great for taking out multiple targets, and we do need more moments with the two.

I don't believe their dead. It'll be total bullcrap for the two to reunite with the others as well as them caring for each other, just for them to die like that. So, yeah, they'll be fine.....they freaking better.

Still wish Forge contacted the rest of X-Factor to have a big team up and get some extra help.

More classic outfits

I do like some of them, like Storm's, Rogue's, Cyclop's (although, I'll miss seeing his hair), and Wolverine's brown and yellow.

However, I'm not a fan of Jean's Marvel Girl outfit. I like her 90s outfit that she had before better.

Also, Morph's outfit is just the yellow and blue but with big shoulder pads....why?

So, Roberto's a member of the X-Men now? So, he got an outfit too, but I wish we could've seen the buildup for him being a member. Last time I checked, he wasn't interested in being a member, but still hung out with Jubilee and became his boyfriend. The outfit's not bad, but it doesn't feel like it's been earned.

Xavier

*sigh* I'm probably the only one here that feels bad for the professor. But, I also feel like it could've been handled better. Have Xavier actually stay in contact with them while away. Have him still be recovering but still too sick to go back home. Hell, have him be in a coma! Many things in this show could've been done to give Xavier more of a reason why he wasn't there during that year time-skip instead of the black hole excuse.

Now, things are tense between him and Scott because he picked Magneto to lead the team. Okay, Magneto was doing fine, he was just more strict is all. Plus, I thought we were done with the distrust of Magneto after episode two.

Even Rogue is mad at him, which I get why. And, Magneto won't listen to him, which again, I also get why. I just where all this conflict is gonna lead to in the finale.

Rogue and Sunspot

So, those two chose Magneto, and not gonna lie, I got upset with that. When she was talking about leading the mutants at Genosha, I thought she rejected the offer back in episode 5, so I didn't understand what she meant by that. I get that she doesn't want to see more mutants die, but they're dying anyway and more are gonna die. I get that she's pissed at what happened, and she still has that anger and grief over what happened to Gambit, but when all this is done, where is she gonna go? Back to the X-Men? That is if there's still a team left.

Roberto.....okay, I get why he sided with Magneto, and I'm trying to like this version of Sunspot. But, I'm sorry, but I couldn't. Not after hurting Jubilee like that. Her being there for him wasn't enough after everything that happened wasn't enough. Plus, he has no idea what he's getting himself into. He's new to all this, he has no idea what Magneto has done or what he's capable of. So I was okay with Jubilee fighting back.

Rogue's choice made Nightcrawler sad....I hate seeing that precious blue elf devil man being sad. Thank god, we didn't have those two fight, otherwise, I'd be more upset. But, it was sad seeing her fight Wolverine cause the two are friends.

Also, she was wearing Gambit's coat....why does this show keep hurting so much?

Gold Team vs. Bastion and Sinister

So, Bastion really did love his mother. At least they kept that part of his backstory in this. I don't think she's dead, cause the Prime Sentinels should be alive, just not working. But, what happened to his father? Did his dad die? I've been noticing a lack of dads in the show aside from Scott.

Hulk cameo.

The fight scenes were really good. Especially Sinister vs. Jean. She was so bad@$$ in that fight. Although, I thought Morph was gonna confront Sinister too due to what he did to Morph. But, this is the Summers' family moment.

When did Sinister get control over Cable?! Well, apparently he did, and now he's forced to fight his kinda sorta other mom? At least we got to see his mutant power again.

Is Jean gonna die? Again? Cause, she and Scott are back in good terms in their relationship.

Well, the plan kinda backfired, but there's still a chance to turn it around in the finale.

Blue Team vs. Magneto

Okay, I know that Xavier tried to talk to him, but words ain't gonna reach Magneto anymore. Although, I did laugh when Magneto told him to shut up.

Cyclops disobeying Xavier's orders. Is that the first time that ever happened? Cause damn.

Not gonna lie, I thought Wolverine succeeded in killing Magneto. But, he probably should've kept stabbing and slashing or go for a more vital area. Maybe then Wolverine wouldn't have gotten....that at the end.

Yeah, the end....how freaking dare you do this to Logan! His adamantine ripped out of his body! He still has his skeleton, but to do that to him?! Just....WHY?!?!?!

I know this happened in Fatal Attractions in the comics, but it doesn't mean I wanted it to happen to him in the show! I feel so bad for Logan.

Also, WHY DID YOU BRING THE GUY WITH METAL IN HIS BODY TO FIGHT A GUY WHO CAN MANIPULATE METAL?!?!?! Did it ever come across their minds that this would've been a bad idea? I know that the writers want this comic moment to happen, but come on! Logan should've been with the gold team!

I think that's all I got at the moment. I made a post of potential outcomes for the finale from the comics at the result of what happened to Logan. And, I'm dreading what might come to fruition. As for the stuff with Bastion and Sinister, they gotta turn things around for that one. But, I'm worried that the finale will lead to a dark end instead of a hopeful one. The finale will have to make it or break it for me, cause I love X-Men and all this conflict and stuff is just hurting so much. I still like the show, and it's way WAY better than the What If series in the MCU. But, we'll have to see what happens next week.

[shiny-jr]

Spoiler from diasomnia chapter

Yes From what you just said, take the 2nd Halloween event i was pretty annoyed with the fact that only ace sort of scolded mal, like wth no one cares? No one will speak their minds? So yeah I feel like it will end like that but on a bigger scale, 'poor him he didn't knew better ' huuu no, i don't think so

In general all OB guys have gone basically free, i don't mean expel them but ... Nobody is going to do something? The one I've seen more ' punished for his actions' is Jamil bc Scarabia sort of turned their backs at him (which later got fixed but at least we saw some consequences)

🐏(?

FOR REAL. I'm pretty sure I already talked about it here, but in case I haven't, the second halloween event ending was complete bs. I hate how the ghosts, Lilia, and Malleus basically kinda gaslit everyone into believing that everyone else was in the wrong when in actuality everyone was completely valid in their belief that they were fighting for their life. And everyone else just apologized? Nah, be fucking for real. The second halloween event kinda a flop for that. Ace was the only real one in that entire event because he didn't stand for that crap. Not only that, but he was genuinely so worried for the mc and Grim!

As for the overblots, they've been getting increasingly worse. Like, Riddle was bad enough and he was the first one. So let's do a review, shall we? Spoilers all the way from chapter one to what we know of chapter seven.

Riddle. At first, I used to think his meltdown was pretty tame. That is, until I read part of the fight depicted in the manga. The fight in the manga goes way more into detail. I skimmed over it, but basically Cater was stabbed (thankfully it was one of his clones) and I remember Riddle throwing one of the roses bushes at either Trey, Ace, or the MC. The manga shows the fights way better than the game, and it becomes obvious that Riddle tries to hit everyone lethally more than once. However, despite that and destroying his dorm's garden, he's let off with his only punishment being to apologize and to bake a tart. Really? He almost killed people and that's it? And that's just the first one! But, it's a lot more tame than the others.

Leona takes it up a tiny notch. From here on out, I can't go into detail about the fight itself because the fighting is best depicted in the manga and the manga isn't here yet, but we have the game to go off of. We know for a fact that Leona was ready to suffocate Ruggie and even turn him to sand. Hell, if I remember right, he even turned a tiny part of his skin to sand. And he planned to injure an entire stadium if necessary. But all that was done was "oh, because you nearly killed people and your closest friend, your team isn't allowed to play in the tournament anymore" BUT to make things worse, the other teams chime in like "nah, let them play, because we want to beat them." WHAT? People nearly died??

I think Azul stays about the same level as Leona, if not lower. Leona was ready to put innocent citizens at risk, while Azul knocked students around his dorm unconscious(?) after stealing their magic. But afterwards, he just changed his scamming ways to be more low-key and chose to return the photograph he had MC and their gang steal. That was literally it. Like, bruh. I imagine he nearly killed people too, but it wasn't specified so I can't say for sure. But really?

Jamil finally takes it up another notch. I think he was seriously hoping the fall from his hit killed Kalim and co when he sent them flying. That, or they just wouldn't survive when that far out into the realm, but I can't be sure on this one. Then he hypnotizes everyone in the dorm. Again, like all the other fights, I can only assume there were multiple lethal attacks that weren't depicted well in the game. Even though it seems like he faced the most punishment with his dorm turning their back on him, idk, it didn't feel like enough.

Vil is probably the one I sympathize with the least. Before he even overblotted, he tried to poison and murder Neige but Rook nearly took his place. I'd say it's very safe to say he nearly killed MC, Grim, Ace, Deuce, Rook, Epel, Jamil, and Kalim by how roughed up everyone was after the battle. He also thought if he got rid of everyone else then he'd be the most beautiful, insinuating that he would harm or kill others. Right after overblotting, he says, "The suffering won't last long. You'll stop breathing soon" and later "Do you really think any who look upon my ugly form is allowed to live?" Yeah, he was definitely aiming to kill. And if Jamil and others hadn't discreetly evacuated the stadium, people would've died. Afterwards he apologized and paid money to the team (the reward money he owed for the loss in the contest), but that was kinda it.

Idia... oh boy. I sympathize with him the most by far, but he didn't get the punishment he should have gotten. Where do I even start with him? To put it simply, if the other guys were fires with ranging heat levels, Idia was a fucking forest fire. This guy and his little brother almost caused the destruction of the world, and that's not an exaggeration. First his family's company basically invaded the school and planned to erase their minds of the event afterwards. Not his fault, but he did go along with it. Then he emotionally tormented the previously overblotted guys after the company kidnapped them by allowing those trials that showcased fights with their closest friends. Finally, he planned to release all of the thousands of phantoms on the island which would have caused world-wide destruction. But then he was somehow still allowed to attend school like normal after an apology or something? Honestly, it was such a shitty minor punishment that I actually forgot most of it, because then they were all in the living room playing video games with him like he didn't just nearly put the world on the verge of armageddon. This ending annoyed me the most so far. Emphasis on so far.

Malleus, oh god, I can already tell that his ending will probably piss me off the most. Like, how are you going to top the disaster Idia and Ortho nearly wrought? Well, shit is already hitting the fan in his chapter, and it is concerning considering how early it is for him to be overblotting. Honestly, like Vil, I can't say I sympathize with him too much. But based on the other chapters, it'll probably end with everyone being a-okay with the fact that Malleus cursed the entire island. Honestly, if it were me, I would not be able to forgive Malleus for that. And I know he's gonna get away with it and have little to no repercussions because he's even more influential than Idia.

[ivebeencursedbygays]

Kai: But when all hope seemed lost, I had an epiphany! 

Kai, earlier: I'm going to throw myself into the sea.

Zane: Kai, you can do anything! 

Kai: Anything? 

Zane: Anything! 

Kai, holding a torch: ANYTHING?!?! 

Zane: Wait, not that!

Cole: Guess who just found out the difference between wax paper and parchment paper the hard way? 

Nya: Wait, what’s the difference? 

Cole: One you can use in the oven safely, and the other you can also use in the oven... if the thing you are trying to make happens to be fire.

Kai: Time sensitive question how flirt boy. 

Pixal: Throw rocks at he. 

Cole: Hot Dogs. 

Morro: Kill him. 

Kai: Thanks guys.

Nya: Clownery. Tomfoolery. Absolute fuckery, I am going to revoke your life privileges.

Pixal: You use emojis like a straight person. 

Kai: That’s literally the worst thing anyone has ever said about me.

Kai: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers? 

Jay: Peonies, why? 

Kai: 

Jay: Were you going to get me flowers? 

Kai: 

Jay: 

Kai: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

Jay: Wow, that was quick thinking on that phony sacrifice stuff. 

Nya: Oh, that was all real. 

Jay: Wait, you were trying to help them kill us?! 

Nya: If I’m gonna be sacrificed, I’m gonna do it right.

*The gang is about to do something dangerous* 

Cole: Shouldn’t someone give a pep talk? 

Kai: Go ahead. 

Cole: Be careful. 

Cole: Don’t die. 

Pixal: *Holds back a laugh* 

Kai: Great. We’re all bloody inspired.

Jay: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT! 

Cole: At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone. 

Jay: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch? 

Cole: Somehow that's worse.

Kai: I can’t believe my birth certificate says F... 

Kai: ...How did I fail being born?

Cole: Look at me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth, Zane! 

Zane: You can’t expect me to look into your eyes and be straight.

Pixal: You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon. 

Pixal: It's me.

Cole, in a room with Jay, Kai, and Nya: It’s calm in here. 

Cole: It scares me…

Nya: Fight me! 

Kai, standing behind them and holding a knife: *mouths* Do not.

Zane: Nya got into a fight. 

Kai: That’s bad. 

Kai: 

Kai: Did she win?

Cole: Jay, I don’t think I can handle any more of your tomfuckery. 

Jay: Oh yeah? Well I can keep going until you’re all tomfuckered out!

Kai: Is that a gun?! 

Jay: It's not what it looks like! 

Kai: It looks like a gun! 

Jay: Okay, maybe it is what it looks like, but in my defense, it doesn't have anymore bullets, so I technically can't shoot it anymore. 

Kai: ...ANYMORE?!

Kai, to the Squad: I’d die for you. 

Jay: Then perish. 

Pixal: You will. 

Nya: Please don’t. 

Cole: Cool. 

Zane: I’d die for you first.

Nya: If you got arrested what would be the charges? 

Jay: Theft. 

Zane: Disturbing the peace. 

Cole: Aggravated assault. 

Kai: Arson. 

Pixal: All of the above. In that order, probably.

Nya: You know what I asked Santa for Christmas this year? 

Jay: If you say me, I swear I’ll— 

Nya: You? What? No, I asked him for that cool Ninjago Lego set we saw in Target!

Cole, texting Zane: Zane there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it? 

Cole: Pls hurry because I’m going to cry 

Cole: Zane 

Cole: Zane 

Zane: Zane is dead. You’re next. Love, Moth.

Pixal: A sprite is anything not static. 

Jay: A sprite is a variable object, be it 2d or 3d. 

Cole: A sprite is a fucking soda. 

Cole: You god damn geekass bastards.

Kai: *sighs* I have no friends... 

Jay: 

Jay: *coughs* Bitch, what am I? A roach?!

Zane: *tapping fingers on table* 

Cole: *taps fingers back furiously* 

Jay: …What’s going on? 

Pixal: Morse code. They’re talking. 

Zane: -.-- ..- .-. / - …. . / -.-. ..- - . … - 

Cole: *slams hands on table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

Jay: *finds half a watermelon at Whole Foods* 

Jay, holding it up for everyone to see: LIES!

Kai: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one. 

Nya: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

Kai, singing: I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need— 

Zane: A family. 

Cole: A better love life. 

Nya: Mental stability. 

Pixal: *clueless* Bagels?

Zane: Don't joke about murder. I was murdered once and it offends me.

Jay: I'm sorry. Please talk to me. 

Kai: 

Jay: Hello? World's most amazing person?? Sweet pea? Precious cinnamon roll that's too good for this world, too pure? 

Kai: 'Sorry' doesn't bring back my fucking M&Ms.

Nya: You think that’s cringe? Moms around the world wait 9 months just to end up naming their kid Jay. 

Jay: Hey, fuck you.

Jay: Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!

Pixal: Why is Kai crying? 

Zane: They saw a leaf on the sidewalk and- 

Kai: IT LOOKED SO CRUNCHY! 

Pixal: Please don’t say what I think you’re gonna say- 

Kai: AND WHEN I STEPPED ON IT THERE WAS NO CRUNCH! 

Pixal: NO, NOT THAT!

Zane: Hey, what have you two been up to? 

Nya: We were helping Kai write his vows, but he kicked us out because Cole was making inappropriate suggestions. 

Cole: How is “Jay, I love your sweet ass” inappropriate?