Would it be wierd to go to the butchers and ask if I can watch him break down a cow? It's a skill set, one I know I'm good at as an amateur but I wanna watch a professional. What I really want to do is translate traditional beef butchery to game animals, because while I have a good working knowledge of animal physiology, the specific culinary terms for cuts of meat are a mystery. (We couldn't just call things by their names could we?)
I feel like it would be wierd, but I also feel like we could get past the wierd. I'm friendly and persuasive. I don't want to intern or apprentice all I want to do is hang out for a bit and pick up some tricks.
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*the entire team is high, drunk, or both*
Connor: So what makes a butcher knife more butch than other knives?
Stephen: The knife itself isn't necessarily butch. It’s named that because it's wielded by a butcher, who is more butch than the other food shop owners.
Connor: Hmm, I see.
Abby: What, then, makes the butcher more butch than other food shop owners?
Stephen: The knife.
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Just a Taste?
Dead dove, do not eat. Please read the content warnings!!
Contains: eating a person (technically not cannibalism because it’s a human and a god), religious themes (not Christian), long term captivity, magic, regrowing limbs, dehumanization, immortal whumpee, god whumpee, messed up mental headspace, amputation, butchery (as in the cutting of meat, not the other definition)
———
The butcher hummed to themself as they prepped their shop for the day. The morning light streamed through the windows and hit the recently wiped down surfaces, making the whole place sparkle.
They adored their job. Cutting up the meat and packaging it was strangely satisfying. And they liked how people’s face lit up when they tried the free samples of jerky and seasoned patties. How they brought joy with their cooking.
The only downside to it was their special meat. A priceless food that most people would usually only get to eat in once or twice in their lifetime if they weren’t lucky enough to have a nearby source (and very, very few did). It had to be cut fresh every day, or else it would lose its magic.
The meat of a god.
Gods automatically healed their injuries. Even losing limbs or organs would come back within a day or so. And their meat could heal anything if eaten. Lost limbs, broken bones, deathly illnesses, comas, and more. What’s more, it tasted better than anything else. It was the most exquisite, rich, juicy flavor and texture known to man.
Even still, obtaining it was quite frustrating. The butcher was insanely lucky to have their own god, but that didn’t stop how much the brat would fight back.
Of course, it was understandable that it fought. Gods were simple and stupid. They didn’t remember that their flesh would grow back or that they weren’t in danger of pain. It was very annoying. The butcher couldn’t believe that their ancestors had once worshipped these things. Eh, they had less information on gods back then. At least people knew now that it was foolish. The gods couldn’t really do anything for them.
- - -
The god tried not to wail as they heard the butcher come near the doorway to their cell. It happened every day, there was no escape. But still, every day they wished that they could just put it off for a little while longer.
Their powers had faded many decades ago, when everyone stopped believing. The only thing that remained if their godhood was their healing and immortality. They didn’t even remember their name anymore.
They hated their automatically healing. What had once been a blessing and meant that they could keep serving their humans was turned into a curse by those same humans that they had once sworn to protect.
Now they were just food. An endless supply of mythical meat.
But even still, the couldn’t fight nature. They were glad that they were still helping humans. As much as they hated the pain, at least they could fill the bellies and heal the injuries and illnesses of their humans. They were still useful to the humans.
They tried to hold onto that lovely idea as the butcher came down the stairs, saw in hand. They focused on all the good their meat will provide as their arms were chopped off and thrown into a pile. Their organs taken, their legs cut into pieces. They tried to remember that helping humans has always been their purpose, but the pain was too much.
The butcher thought that they didn’t feel pain, but no. They felt every second of it. They felt when their body was torn apart by the saw. The way the cold, stale air stung and burned. The dust and grime of their cell getting mixing with the new blood. The unending things that didn’t know how to describe; the aches that were hundreds of times worse than imaginable.
And say nothing of the regrowing process. It was anywhere close as painful to the process of losing them, but it still hurt like hell, especially since they had to grow everything back all at once.
But what hurt the most, what always hurt the most, was knowing that all of it will happen again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next. And the next.
They tried to not cry most of the time. It made them feel stupid and weak. But they caved in today and cried for a long, long time.
———
@kim-poce <3
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Sigrid Holmwood (British, 1978), Butchering a Pig, 2010. Fluorescent egg and oil tempera, cobalt blue, lead white, lead antimonite, burnt sienna, raw sienna, vermillion, ultramarine ashes, verdigris and madder in oil on linen, 35 1⁄2 x 45 1⁄2 in.
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My own cannibal au! I see a lot of ppl make it to where ones the cannibal and ones the detective, but in mine Murdoc’s a butcher and Stu is his employee. Murdoc doesn’t actually sell any human meat; he uses the freezer to do all his work and hide bodies since its already made for easy cleanup/keeping things fresh. Stu is a new resident in the town, so he has no idea all the allegations towards Murdoc, he just thinks he’s misunderstood and actually learns that Murdoc is really sweet, and very protective of his reputation and store. Murdoc’s shop was close to going out of business before Stu came along in perfect timing, Murdoc’s being the only place he could find a job he had no other option. Now with Stu running the front business is back and Murdoc can focus on more important things...
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