#contender for Polycules Of All Time

[saturdays--sun]

i was really like "this is my boyfriend kyouhei and his boyfriend chikage" and "we start dating and chikage asks if we need a third" as a joke, but i don't think it's a joke anymore.

[areyougonnabe]

I know nothing about polar exploration! Or Shackleton! But you seem excited about it!

Have a favourite fact you'd like to share?!?

well my two favorite facts have already been shared which are the cautionary tale of the toxic polar polycule and the story of the antarctic lovebirds !!!

but here is a contender for #3... the tale of jessamine.

let's start with our homies Deb (left) and Griff (right), aka Frank Debenham and T. Griffith Taylor, the geologists of terra nova's cape evans shore party:

they would both later go onto impressive careers in academia, start families, basically be well-liked hard-working guys (also participants in 20th century imperialism but let's take that as given based on our starting point of this expedition lol)

BUT we are meeting them here, in antarctica, aged 27 and 30, "Early Career Researchers" as we might call them now. trying to keep busy with SCIENCE during the long antarctic winter night of 1911!!!!!

these guys go way back btw. Deb was born and raised in Australia and and Griff moved to Australia when he was a kid, and they both attended the fancy-schmancy King's School near Sydney, the Australian equivalent of british public school (e.g. Eton). according to griff they were family friends at that time although they would have been a few years apart at school.

later around 1908 they both studied at the University of Sydney under leading geologist Sir Edgeworth David, who had been on Shackleton's Nimrod expedition and reached the South Magnetic Pole with Mawson. They both ended up being hired onto Scott's expedition through university connections, Deb via Professor David and Griff through a scholarship to Cambridge where he met Wilson.

okay. backstory established. now one thing you need to know about Griff is that he was a total freak. like Racovitza, he was a Poster before there were online platforms to Post on. if you had that kind of brain back then, and no access to adderall, you had to just sit around inventing new kinds of science instead of deep-frying spongebob screencaps. he was a consummate edwardian memelord who would read a novel per day and still have time to write 20 pages of diary in which he would floridly record the silliest things that happened since the morning, the various quirks and quotes of expedition members, and then complain about captain scott in shorthand.

to say nothing of his passion for CREATIVE WRITING! vitally, Griff was one of the main contributors to the Cape Evans hut magazine, the South Polar Times edited by Apsley Cherry-Garrard. there were 3 issues of this during the winter of 1911 and 1 issue during the winter of 1912, the latter of which included much material written/submitted during 1911 before the polar party met with tragedy.

Griff was a versatile writer, and his pieces (which would sometimes cumulatively make up nearly half an issue of the SPT by page count) ran the gamut from expository nonfiction to speculative poetry to comedic epistolary to magazine pastiche. he had certain motifs that he frequently returned to—none as compelling, in my opinion, as that of Jessamine. or Jasmine, or Jessie, or Jessica, as the case may be...

it all began, according to Griff's diary, early in the austral winter of 1911, when Deb was "christened Jasmine by Titus [Oates]."

where this nickname came from is unclear—many of the men had picked up female nicknames on the voyage down (see "Jane" Atkinson, "Marie" Nelson, "Penelope" Pennell) but Deb had not been on the voyage down because he had gotten picked up in Australia, so this may have been a belated attempt to correct that omission. Griff wrote in his book about the expedition, "We were short of female society—which lack also accounts for Jessie Debenham as an alternative to Deb."

in any case, the name clearly caught on: on midwinter day, a little under two months after the nickname's debut, Griff recorded that during the gift exchange after dinner "Every second present or so was a necklace or earrings for Miss Jessie Debenham."

(deb and titus at midwinter dinner)

THIS GOT REALLY LONG SO CLICK READ MORE IF YOU ARE INTERESTED!!

in the second SPT issue of 1911, Griff's 17-page narrative "The Bipes" describes the inhabitants of the Cape Evans hut from the perspective of a rabbit who lives in the stables. you can read the whole thing here and please do!!! (you'll need a VPN outside the US) BUT here is the relevant bit dealing with Deb:

U. PULCHERRIMA. This Bipe inhabits a strongly defended Bungkh in the Ubdug burrow. It is supported by mighty baulks of timber and can only be reached by means of a dangerous ladder. The Bungkh is supplied with heavy hammers, piles of stones and other offensive weapons. These precautions are, I believe, necessary in the Bipe courtship, for she is often called upon to repel members of other burrows who approach her balcony with blandishments. Her time is chiefly occupied with a primitive quern or handmill, and at this she grinds for long hours every day. I judge that this merely satisfies some primitive habit, for no flour seems to be produced. But it is pleasant to see how strong is the feminine instinct.

the species name "Pulcherrima" is also the species name of the pointsetta flower, and can be translated to "beautiful woman" (i think??)

here's the illustration produced by Bill Wilson (based on Griff's sketch) to accompany the above - yes that's a portrait of Griff in her bunk and Birdie below attempting to woo her:

it must be noted that Meares, nicknamed "Mother," also gets cast in a female role in the Bipes piece, but does not receive the privilege of being drawn in a skirt, rip.

anyway, the next issue of the SPT, vol 3 issue III, is the last one to be produced before the end of winter. Griff decided to one-up himself and write a piece in which Jessamine takes center stage. The Ladies Letter is a pitch-perfect parody of the "Ladies Column" sections that appeared in many periodicals of the era—full of french fashion terms and simpering style suggestions. Griff brilliantly adapts the format for a pastiche on the subject of Antarctic fashion; not free, naturally, from general whiffs of period-typical misogyny, but as those being mocked in specific are fellow expedition members and not any actual women i forgive him.

written in the form of a letter from Jessamine to her absent friend Cynthia (whose identity i'm unsure of BUT i'm tempted to say is supposed to be Priestley, away at Cape Adare), the piece again features multiple expedition members in female roles, including Silas as "American" Sally Wright, Cherry as "Madame Chérie - that dear delightful person - who builds her beautiful creations on strictly scientific principles of hygiene and aesthetics" and Birdie as Madame Berdé, who "finds that for well developed figures it is most distinctive to use a cross-gartering well above the ankle. She herself is naturally a consistent exponent of this latter fashion."

and then of course there is Jessamine's star turn. she is wearing the newest fashion, "a modification of last year's 'tube skirt' [which] even more closely swathes the lower limbs, and it is necessary that the wearer should be rolled along by her maid."

Jessamine reveals that she is planning to induce Titus Oates to bring her a proposal of marriage through the clever use of themed charms on her chatelaine.

All the smartest girls have wreathed chains of mascots around the skirt, and a pretty idea, which I commend to you, is to have silver model made of those articles which interest THE ONLY MAN WHO COUNTS. Breathe this to no one! But Mappin & Webb are making me such a choice set. The cutest little pony; a horse snowshoe (this is very lucky); a dead rabbit; a popgun; and a silver blazon PER MARE PER TERRAM PRO TITO; this will be attached to my 'tube', and then I really do expect to bring him to a proposal.

this scenario was illustrated hilariously by Bill, complete with Jessamine being rolled along, and Titus ignoring her as could be expected, in favor of a pony (Christopher?):

now, Deb is on record saying that Titus was his best friend on the expedition, but it may well be a classic case of "you are not your best friend's best friend," because per other accounts Oates was much closer to Meares and Atch than he was to Deb. that's just an observation to add a little flavor to Jessamine's desperate pursuit as portrayed here...

and not to look a gift horse (ha) in the mouth, but i do feel that Bill's illustrations don't quiiiiiite do the genderfuckery of Griff's text justice—Jessamine describes herself as wearing a frock inspired by the aurora, but Bill instead draws Deb in normal sledging gear plus some non-dress-shaped colorful streamers. a missed opportunity...

also, lest you think that Griff was the only one partaking in the Jessamine joke in the SPT, there is also a sneaky reference in the anonymous feature "My Favorite Book":

(J-SS-- [JESSIE]: "Not like other girls")

BUT WAIT. THERE'S EVEN MORE.

viewing the handwritten drafts of the SPT held at the SPRI (because all of this is going to be an actual academic paper someday hopefully lol), i learned that there were a fair handful of references omitted from the final version, presumably thanks to Cherry's editorial oversight.

one "answer to correspondents" written by "Marie" Nelson went as follows:

Jessica: A single lady cannot be too careful about the respectability of her lodgings or the character of her companions.

(referencing Deb bunking with Griff and Gran, two of the more annoying/messy people in the hut)

and an unused entry in "Songs And Their Singers" by Teddy Evans was:

Oh What’s Womans Duty - Jasmin

lastly, and most importantly, the drafts contained the one instance i could find of deb firing back about this whole thing.

vol IV of the SPT consisted of one issue released during winter 1912, when a lot of people had gone home (including Griff), and everyone left behind knew the polar party was dead and they'd have to go look for their bodies in the spring. it was not a fun time. vol IV contained a lot of material written the previous year but not included, since for obvious reasons folks weren't really up to being silly. one of those pieces was "A Day's Doings, Told By Our Diarist," written during winter 1911 by Deb as a parody of Griff. it's pretty funny in published form (p. 72 of this pdf)—Deb is on-point mocking Griff's dislike of eating ("Breakfast is an unintellectual meal, so gave it a miss. Better a bit more bunk than a bite more breakfast.") and his never-ending theorizing ("Thought out a new theory as to the origin of debris cones: yesterday’s wasn’t good enough").

however, the draft is exponentially more hilarious. Cherry, damn him, cut the absolute BEST BIT:

Made a genre sketch of Jasmine brushing her (his) hair – it’s a fool nickname anyways, mixes up the genders. 

knowing Deb—quiet, patient, chronically non-confrontational—that's about as explicit as he was willing to get, as far as revealing how he felt about the nickname. writing Griff realizing that it's a bit silly, he reveals to some degree his own discomfort. now, was it a "protest too much" situation or had he genuinely gotten fed up with being the Designated Girl Of The Hut? we shall never know!!!!!!!!

however the draft of the piece ends thusly: "[I] got paralysed at chess by the wily Jasmine, it’s a mud game, if ever there was one. Hinc illae lacrimae!"

so despite all the aspersions cast on her honor, and the failure of Titus Oates to accept her proposal, Jessie still triumphs in the end :)))

[abyssalaerlocke]

Bhaalfools

What if the tadfools were all Bhaalspawn?

Some try to resist, committing murders infrequently, and battling the consuming Urge that boils over.

Some of them are catty and competitive, engaging in inter-spawn rivalries for honour/attention.

Some are straight up trying to assassinate the others so they can be the last one standing and become Bhaal's Chosen.

How's Durgetash going for Enver in this universe? Is he having a good time? Does he have a harem/polycule of Durges? Or is he contending with a litter of disapproving Orin in-laws?

How many little murder butlers are there, disapproving, and guiding undevoted spawn?

The dynamics are such a good vibe. I want.

[inquisitor-gayfax]

have u read the Lelith Hesperax book? Sisters of battle ain't got nothing on the polycule drama Lelith has going on.

OH BOY HOWDY HAVE I !!!!

What doesn't it have, honestly. Lelith creeping on a poor Ynnari couple (or throuple, or entire polycule) just trying to have some private time! Lelith playing with Yvraine's hair and flirting via death threat! Harlequin troupe performance!! Murder meet cute! 3-day bender orgy with all the girls! Full-on torture elf "I can't quit kill you" moment(s)!! Vect being foiled by the power of lesbian exes getting back together!!!

Contender for THE Black Library book of all time honestly. Thank you Mike Brooks, the sapphics will remember this.

[callibones]

Whats your favorite version of Revolver Ocelot?

this is the most difficult thing anyone has ever asked me. i know this because i thought "oh! it's obvious" and then changed my answer so many times that i realized id hit ALL of them.

in the time it took me to type that paragraph my favorite changed three more times and im not kidding. im feeling it wildly fluctuate in my brain.

mgs1: ocelot classic. old man loves his revolvers. adore. went to torture university and got a degree in torture and now everyone's saying boo hoo torture's immoral.

mgs2: liquid ocelot. outstanding. hes even better in mgs4 but here hes already wonderful. it doesnt even matter where hes better though because liquid ocelot is one Version. so the only preference ive been able to determine here is irrelevant to the question.

mgs3: baby ocelot. ocelots are proud creatures *spins guns for several minutes and MEOWS*. i understand how he felt when big boss called him pretty good and you could see in his eyes him falling absolutely in love. this ocelot made me adore all ocelots more for having met him. so absolutely a contender. but

mgs4: liquid ocelot again. here hes OUTSTANDING. dude is SO not liquid snake and it SHOWS. hes having so much fun. that one scene where he does the thing with the finger guns. is just. perfect. hes in his element. his boss fight is perfection. but

mgs5: cowboy ocelot. theres no two ways about it this ones hot. sorry. the other ones are just endearing and delightful but this one. i dunno. he still sucks. he pronounces french wrong on purpose because he hates french people. iconic behavior. his design is at his best. the polycule is in fucking shambles. hes in the same game as kaz which would overshadow literally anyone else except venom snake and him. (huey is not overshadowed because he was never a contender for most endearing. hes one of my favorite characters in media for different reasons. this is because he is so patently over the top horrible in such a fun way that hes different.)

after going through all of these in my head i can safely say that like.

i love love love ocelot classic but the others are better. fourth favorite

cowboy ocelot is really fun and fantastic and funny. gets great lines and hates the french. third favorite

between baby ocelot and liquid ocelot i am agonizing. but. but. but.

hold on i just remembered cowboy ocelot does that thing in 5 where he echoes all of the lines from big boss about how guns work and i remembered i loved him even more than i thought and now im stuck between those three again. anon what have you DONE. this is CRUEL.

um

okay im at a loss i was hoping describing each of them in turn would help but im even more dead set in the tie now. liquid ocelot is so different from baby ocelot is so different from cowboy ocelot. cowboy ocelot is, even more than ocelot classic, the Platonic Ideal of revolver ocelot, Fully Formed but not yet in his Containment Breach Form. so as far as who i think of when i think of my "favorite ocelot" it's gotta be cowboy ocelot. you can chart the line from baby ocelot right to him and see how he got even more iconic. with his stupid hat

[buttercupart]

In your own opinion, what do you think is based about AnneLuz? I just started getting into crossover shipping for funsies and something about this one takes the cake

Well aside from eggman polycule with bowser and dr wily LOL

absolutely obsessed w/ everything down to the wording in this ask even if we don't have time to address that last part ^%&^$

OKAY WELL it was a thing for a while with both Anne and Luz being character parallels - two teenagers lost in mysterious magical worlds and making friends and family all the while contending with the seeming inevitability of returning to their home dimensions. this only compounded further as both series went on and more and more parallels were able to be drawn between the two

theres also the fact that as far as "canon" interactions between the two of them have gone so far, first with the comiccon 2021 crossover reading and then the "amphibia house" chibi tiny tales episode from january '23..... well its all kinda. You Know

tl;dr i think its very cute because in many ways they're like the only people who could ever fully understand what the other's been through, and also every semicanon interaction between them has been nothing but positive and sweet

[scribz-ag24]

i know this is super late but if you're still open to asks for the fandom ask meme, 13 and 23?

Hmmm it's hard to say since I'm always focusing on grovyle/dusknoir/celebi stuff and I've already drawn Guildshipping as well. Actually, it's probably Darkrai/Cresselia. I always like the couple as a kid bc of their dynamic in the games and anime, about them not being evil/good, but counterparts that protect and need each other.

Inside the pmd universe, Darkrai is barely a character at all, I think he's the weakest narrative point in the entire game, and a good contender for most boring antagonist of the franchise (if only for how much of a downgrade he is compared to the rest of the Explorers games' plot), but there is a scene in Explorers of Spirit that shows a deeper bond between Darkrai and Cresselia, and a sort of betrayal between them, that catches my attention. Since there's nothing on the main game that contradicts that headcanon, I just run with it and adopt it for myself, we do love some friends to enemies dynamic here.

Basically, they could be so toxic yuri to me and i really hope i get to clean some sketches i did about them some time lol.

Also maybe revisit those Grovyle/Dusknoir/Darkrai toxic yaoi ideas bc they were really fun to work with lmao. Maybe even simply inserting darkrai into the future polycule and having them all want to kill him rfqegvqerq

And in case youre curious about the Fionna and Cake fandom, i have an entire comic about Astrid and Scarab I wish i had the energy to clean lmao. So it'd be Astrid, she's a cute little annoying fangirl

My favourite character changes every day because I can never decide on whether I prefer Grovyle or Dusknoir lmao. They're both too good. But on the shipping side of things...

Funnily enough, I guess I went from being strictly a Dusknoir/Grovyle fan after se5 to becoming a fan of the polycule after some reflection. I didn't want to get frustrated by how much attention Grovyle/Celebi had despite Celebi's short time on-screen (and at first frustrating "tee hee im a girl,, im pink and have a crush on boy pokemon uwu" characterization) and become one of good ol' toxic 13 yo fujoshis who hated female characters for "being an obstacle" to the yaoi ship. So I tried to focus more on Celebi and I ended up liking her quite a lot once I tried to read more between lines and drew her more times! Especially since you can basically make her have any dynamic you want with Dusknoir. She can be very fun to write and draw! I just wish the writing in the game had given her more... well, writing.

And in the Adventure Time fandom ig i stopped liking Prismo/Scarab a lot after a while and just preferred Kheirosiphon/Scarab but i basically shipped Scarab wwith anyone so there''s not much difference xd

[aquaquadrant]

I was rereading from eden and I love (read as: invested in) all the background ships like impulse's polycule (good for him) and scarian and I'm just amused by the wave of domesticity that fell over grian to curb the bloodlust of the life series and like all I can see is scar being insufferable (affectionate)

It's that landlord "no pets allowed" "ill make an exception because he looks very polite" meme except it's grian and life series emotional attachments.

The background scarian in this is precious to me *cue grian flying scar into battle* (is soft)

ohh i am SO glad to hear that. ‘from eden’ doesn’t always allow me to spend time focusing on the background ships, but i love them just as much. the next chapter should help that a bit ;0

also, fun fact, mumscarian is absolutely a thing in this verse but since mumbo wasn’t in double life, we’ve just got the scarian. when this whole ordeal is over, mumbo is gonna have two very exhausted boyfriends to contend with back on hermitcraft.

[ceo-of-kimona]

What to do with Scott…

A question that many many Kimona enjoyers face in our time is thus: “where the hell do we put Scott Pilgrim?”

The guy is a weird case. He’s the main character, the damn series was named after him, he’s integral to the life and stories of both of these women. Although; he is also a massive cockblock (or vag block?? Idk) and must be obliterated in order for the two to be happy. So, to prevent Kimona fic writers (also known as the greatest and most noble heroes of our time) from needing to contend with this great query again, I shall compile a list of potential things you could do with Scott to get him the hell out of the way. In no particular order.

1. Break Scott and Ramona up

Probably the most direct and simple answer, especially if you’re going for a more cannon compliant, post cannon universe. Though it does kinda invalidate all of the shit they got through to get together if they just split up like that. So I suggest that if you do break them up, make it on good terms. Make it so that it’s mutual and mutually beneficial and mature. Less of a “I hate you and I never want to see you again” and more of a “it was fun, you helped me a lot, but now we gotta go our separate ways in life.” Their development shouldn’t be rendered moot by the breakup, instead make the breakup part of their development.

2. Create an AU where Scott does not exist

A fairly easy one, if Scott doesn’t exist, you can just go along your merry way with your shipping. Fics where Kim finds Ramona before Scott or fics where Scott doesn’t ever fall in love with Ramona for whatever reason also fall under this category. These are good, but a bit bland. There isn’t a great lot you can tell here cause Scott’s douchery kinda holds together the plot pretty much. It is only by him being a rat-ass fuckboy that anyone ever meets anyone in the comics. Also, without having her relationship with Scott, Ramona just doesn’t have her vital character arc that the relationship brings. She’s always gonna be the same ol Flowers when she comes to Kim.

So unless you plan on retelling the entire story of the… everything with Kim instead of Scott, you’ve gotta very flighty and traumatized Ramona Flowers on your hands for the entire fic. Now, this is perfect for angst fics, as using pre-arc flaws to create a tragedy has been a a tool for angst fics since god damn Shakespeare. Also fluff doesn’t really need the “primest character development” in order to be good, so if you’re planning to either make angst or simple fluff then AU is your best bet. If you wanna make something more cannon compliant or lighthearted yet complicated, you’re out of luck.

3. Polycule

Self explanatory. Why not have both? Keep Scott and Ramona’s cute dynamic; and just bring Kim into the mix. While this can be very fun (I’m actually writing a fic where this happens at the moment) it isn’t great for every fic. Cause let’s face it: if you’re here and queer for Kimona, so maybe you do not want to write for the feelings of the dude who got here first so he’s also tagging along. Some people just don’t wanna write Scott, which is perfectly valid. Also, polycules are messy and complicated, both in real life and in fic writing. While complications can create some good drama, it’s also a lot of moving parts to manage. You aren’t getting a Kimona + Pilgrim fic down to 2k words without sacrificing a lot. This one is not built for oneshots or general Pilgrim-haters.

4. Send him off to be with Wallace

Probably one of my favorite options to use. It’s kinda an extension of the “breakup” idea, but it gives a happier ending for Scott, as it lets the breakup make sense. Scott falls in love with Wallace and can’t bear the pining so he communicates with Ramona about it, and they mutually agree that it’s for the better for them to split so he can be with Wells. It also will keep the Scollace shippers at bay, may their apocalyptic wrath be kept at bay /s.

If you don’t really have much stuff outside of Kimona in your fic and don’t know how to get Scott out of the picture, try this one. Just throw in a sentence about Scott being with Wallace and everything will make sense and be chill. Truly an option for us lazy bitches out there who just want yuri. It can also potentially set up some Scollace content later down in the fic if it comes to be of a larger scale, but if you just want your yuri you can throw out a “Scott is with Wallace” line and not need to elaborate further, we get it. All around a flexible, powerful, potent, and fun option. Though if you have any Wallace pairings already set up in your fic and you can’t fit Scollace in, this option obviously won’t be that useful to you.

So…

That’s all of the “bye bye Scott pilgrim” tropes for Kimona fics that I could think of. Now for which one is the best… prepare yourself, the answer is disappointing.

None of them!

No one of these is always gonna work for everything. These tropes are all just tools in your toolbox at the end of the day, and which one you use is up to what you’re writing and how you’re feeling. So don’t be afraid to try multiple of these for your fics, throw shit against the wall like spaghetti. Maybe you’ll find something new that you’ll like.

But that’s enough yapping from me. Now go forth and WRITE!

[therainbowwillow]

I know Van Helsing is most popular for post-canon vampire hunter adaptions, but the whole Polycule of Light has so much potential!

They all try to go back to their day jobs, but they’ve spent months honing in on supernatural symptoms and can’t seem to shake off the wariness. Jonathan is tuned in to his clients’ strange behaviors and begins to suspect that something’s up. Seward is at least 50% sure that a few of his patients are communicating with other-worldly beings the way Renfield was. Mina notices that a few of her students are absent for some time after Lucy’s death and seem… off when they return. Van Helsing treats patients with Lucy-esque symptoms and starts to worry. Arthur, now involved in England’s upper class circles, notes that some of these families go way back… but never seem to gain new members, as if the individuals themselves have been around for ages. Quincey… what is Quincey’s day job? Maybe he’s less dismissive about his horses getting eaten by bats?

ANYWAY! Fearing a repeat of Dracula, they come together again, quit their day jobs and form a little society of monster-hunters. Word gets around and soon, everyone knows where to turn when things aren’t going the way they should. And so the Polycule of Light establishes themselves as the go-to monster hunting agency in England, with Jonathan handling financials, Mina, Arthur, and Quincey gathering information from clients (and spying on people & bribing them for further info) and Jack & Van Helsing examining victims. Once they figure out what’s going on, they pull out the good ‘ol knives, stakes & guns (okay, the guns were never put away, this is Quincey we’re talking about) and head off to hunt down some vampires or werewolves or some other monster that they now have to contend with.

There is POTENTIAL here! Give me post-canon adaptions where everyone plays a role in the story!

And now for an expansion of these ideas with spoilers because I’ve already read Dracula and have thoughts.

Spoilers also possible in the notes, use to your discretion!

Again, spoiler warning below!!!

This is your last chance! Major spoilers ahead!!!

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I refuse to accept that Quincey dies and I feel like any good post-canon AU needs a cowboy to be complete.

There are a lot of work-arounds here. The easiest one is that he is injured, but the two doctors on site (Van Helsing & Jack) manage to save him. I do also enjoy the ‘Quincey is a werewolf’ theory (and thus can’t be hurt by Dracula’s defenders’ non-silver knives). I think it adds another degree of interest to the story that if not all supernatural beings are evil, Dracula is choosing to hurt people and that is extra fucked up. This pairs really well with a Vampire Lucy survives AU, where she takes control of her own (after)life once Dracula is dead and has lost control over her. She rejoins the Polycule of Light to hunt down the undead who are actively choosing to be cruel (with some extra perspective as to which “enemies” aren’t in control of themselves- she’s the Polycule’s ethics branch.)

There is also Jonathan & Mina’s son who makes for a great addition to the plot. I like to think that he is being coparented by the entire Polycule, but is not let in on the supernatural happenings that his six parents + grandpa Van Helsing are contending with while he’s asleep or at school. They tell him when he’s old enough to understand and eventually, he gets to join them on missions.

[fox-toothed]

top 5 relationships on buffy the vampire slayer

oooh okay!!

BUFFY & DAWN!!!! i could write essays and essays and essays about them. i keep writing out and then deleting huge paragraphs of text about them. im weeping as i type this. maybe i'll elaborate later but rn i can't bc i have limited time to answer these. but i love them and i'll never ever be over it. i'll never be over dawn as a character by herself either. i could write essays and essays and e

buffy/faith - toxic yuri i will always love you. faith is buffy's shadow self, an embodiment of all of buffy's repressed desires. they want each other so bad and they try to kill each other about it. whats not to love about this relationship

buffy/spike - still toxic, not yuri. he's her little doggy. he's so in love with her that he'll do anything to make her happy. he has no concept of boundaries and he blatantly disregards hers. she makes him want to be better. she uses him as a sex toy and a punching bag because she knows he won't complain about it. they're an embarrassing freak couple (affectionate AND derogatory) and theyre terrible to each other

willow & xander - his love for her saved the world. i dunno what else to say about this. the yellow crayon scene hits me right in the heart every time.

tara/willow - i'll be honest, if not for willow being a contender for World's Worst Partner, tillow wouldn't have made this list, because cute sweet fluffy no-drama romance isn't all that interesting to me. luckily, willow fucking sucks (affectionate)

honorable mentions go to the whirlwind (darla/angel/drusilla/spike) as a murder polycule, anya/xander, buffy & tara, and spike & dawn.

[theriverbeyond]

Grade the ships: Gideon/Harrow/Ianthe, Ortus/Matthias, and Pyrrha/Wake

gideon/harrow/ianthe

A+: OTP (i don't really do "one true pairs" but this IS the top option on the grading scale)

strong contender for the worst polycule in the universe. absolutely dysfunctional. incredibly funny. good in canon or in any AU situation. gideon and harrow both fuck ianthe when they're mad at each other so she gives them both terrible relationship advice bc it gets her the best sex. ianthe and gideon are both incredibly terribly down bad for harrow but neither wanting to admit it to the world, harrow, or each other. ianthe and harrow would try to explode each other's ribcages but in a hot way. all three of the together would be unstoppable, etc. i'm just gonna link this.

ortus/mattias

B: it's really cute

i'm just really glad ortus got the acknowledgement of his lifelong hero. also i recomend this fic, Excerpt from Book 22 (lost) of The Noniad by Ortus Nigenad, Cavalier Secondary of the Ninth House by oliviacirce on ao3. it's written in meter.

pyrrha/wake

A: i love it

what can i say..... when i am in heaven i will remember your mouth and when you are in hell i hope you remember mine. absolute bonkers ship and 2/3 of the 2nd most well adapted polycule in the series. landmine people. hard to suss out how much of it was pyrrha versus g1deon versus like, some amount of them both at the same time but regardless. hot.

pyrrha would reminisce about the whole thing with a smile on her face but the thing she's reminiscing about would be like, getting stabbed or shot by wake. chasing each other across the universe trying to kill each other..... fucking each other when they get too close. i wonder if they ever found any common ground wrt how pyrrha was a cavalier and killed and eaten and used, and wake's people's persecution by the empire.

send me ships to grade!

[assortedvillainvault]

The DV'Cule VS 1 Ikea Standard Sofa

Part One of the Disney Villain Polycule Posting has arrived! Click here if you want to see the masterlist of upcoming posts this spooky month.

The DV'Cule VS 1 Ikea Standard Sofa

It’s...not a particularly large sofa.

Hades could just make a new one, but someone *stinkeyes Jafar* complained about catching their robes on the spikes last time so now they’re putting up with Ikea furniture.

Maleficent sits in the middle. This is non negotiable. It is non negotiable because certain partners will commit arson if they have to share the same side of the sofa.

The Horned King and Jafar Do Not get along. This has been a source of great amusement for the fairy and a mild nightmare for everyone else.

Maleficent sits in the middle, but the middle has to be Ursula’s lap, since the sea witch is by far the largest by mass in the room. Tentacle throne is now and eight extra limbs ensure that the remote is never far from Ursula’s control.

On her right lounges Hades, with Jafar in his lap since he’s cold almost constantly outside of Agrabah. Snuggled on Hades right is Facilier, also a slut for warmth, while Oogie sits on the floor because the bugs don’t have time or care for propriety and Facilier’s hand on top of the burlap head feels divine.

Persephone sits on the far end of the sofa on top of the arm rest because she’s allergic to sitting properly on anything and she likes to be tall. She and Hades are used to being apart physically, but Gods aren’t just limited to the physical plane so she and her hubby are snuggling hard in a metaphysical sense. Those magically inclined in the room can almost see their higher selves all but snogging in their midst, and wisely know not to say a damn word.

On Maleficent’s left, after some fierce negotiations and a lot of arguing, sits the Headless Horseman, with the Horned King on his lap like a piece of sentient stonework and mortified about it. As the shortest member of the polycule (standing at a frankly astounding 5ft 4in, horns not included) this was a given that he’s going to fume over forever. Rage is stored in the short king.

Finally, Hook sits on the Horseman’s left, because surprisingly aside from Persephone he’s the most level headed in this situation and won’t draw blood over not getting to plaster himself over his other half. This is mostly because Ursula’s tentacles are long enough that they can curl around the back of the sofa and under the horseman's legs to cuddle her pirate from her prime space in the middle.

Gods forbid anybody needs snacks because available spaces will be fought over with blood. And control of the TV is just something they’ve resigned to always being contended.

That they have the modern villains on speed dial because a new TV is needed every month or so is a small price to pay for time spent genuinely relaxing together.

Things keeping the peace more effectively than gods, governments and heroic deeds: visits from Lilo, open mic night at the House of Mouse, and the atlas-level load bearing capacity of this sofa.

Bonus:

I mentioned that Jafar and the Horned King don’t get along and I mean it. Jafar turns everything into a contest. Everything. They glare at each other over Mal’s head every time they make eye contact.

Jafar once made the mistake of goading the King by lounging in Hades’ lap like a particularly pleased, hissy cat and running his fingers down Mal’s arm, maintaining eye contact as he bends to kiss her hand. Hades rolls his eyes, Mal herself raises one amused eyebrow and Jafar finds out the hard way that HK bribed Oogie to put skeletal remains inside the couch JUST so the King could reanimate them and strangle the sorcerer from a distance.

[kattahj]

Fic Meme

I was tagged by @sophiainspace and thought it looked fun! If, reading this, you think it looks fun too, feel tagged!

Please note that I have been writing fic online since 1998, and I will definitely focus more (but not entirely) on the newer stuff. I'll also try not to mention the same fic more than once - there's more than enough to choose from!

Fic Meme

My favourite of my fics... There are definitely fics that are closer to my heart than others – some fics I keep thinking of and expanding on long after they're done, others I forget about until something reminds me. But I can't possibly choose one favourite. Most of the ones below are in the "close to my heart" category.

My fluffiest fic is probably Tight-Knight, a Once Upon a Time fic about knitting. Lots of Swan-Charming-Jones family feels.

My funniest fic is... You know, I really haven't written much humor. Of the relatively new ones, I think HEAnowbitches unveils Rebecca Silver (Legends of Tomorrow fic) is pretty funny.

My saddest fic is... again, of the relatively new ones, Ray and Rose and That Guy Trevor, a Julie and the Phantoms fic about Julie's parents.

A fic I almost didn't post is Just a Small Step, the first of the Jay/Gil stories. Or more accurately, I was hesitant to even write it, because I didn't know who would read it. It was pretty slow to pick up readers, too, but did prove to have a bit of a following before the end.

The fic I had most fun writing is... hard to choose, but I think I'm going to say Glimpses of a Life In Love, the Fergus/Marsali story, just because I've been shipping these two for a quarter century, and it felt so good to have an onscreen version with a fic-reading fandom. Back when I hung out on Outlander mailing lists, if you so much as breathed about fic you got shut down, instantly.

My favourite ship to write is... ohh, this is difficult. I have too many fandoms! But I did really enjoy writing Willex from Julie and the Phantoms in Stealing Back a Soul, because it allowed me to be sappy and also write a love song.

My favourite femslash ship to write is... I had a lot of fun with All This Dystopia Needs is a Blue Door, a Society fic with Becca/Kelly.

My favourite OT3 to write is... the Havenites are near and dear to my heart (such as in Placing my Child in Your Arms), but the love is tinged with bitterness these days. The Man from UNCLE trio in Paragraph 17 is a more uncomplicated love (at least if I don't consider the actors). And of course there's the Three Men and a Baby polycule in Three Men and a Chance at Love.

My favourite non-romantic pairing to write is... I really enjoyed writing Klaus and Ben from Umbrella Academy in A Minor Complication. Though I appreciate all comments on the fic, obviously, it does make me a little salty when people treat it as if it's just a Klaus fic. Ben may not be the POV character, but he's just as important! They also appear together in Drugs, Death, and a Giant Robot, which is a crossover with Dead Like Me.

My favourite character to write is probably Milah from Once Upon a Time, in Other Duties Just as Sacred, because she was such an interesting and potentially complex character, and was completely squandered by the writers (and maligned by the fandom).

My favourite neurodiversity fic is I would say a tie between Closing the Circle (Real Genius fic) and One Step Forward, Two Steps Back (Descendants fic) because Jordan in the former and Gil in the latter are so different from each other. Jordan talks a mile a minute, while Gil has difficulty finding words and picking up on what other people are saying. It made both of their POVs a writing challenge in different ways.

The fic I remember writing most clearly is... hard to tell, but the Haven fic The Muse of Gym Bleachers and Bathroom Stalls is a strong contender. Writing it felt less like making stuff up and more like putting into words what Duke Crocker and Nathan Wuornos clearly must have been up to in their high school days.

My favourite 'written out of spite' fic is... you know, spite isn't really a factor in most of my fics. But if "these characters need more appreciation from both canon and fandom" counts, then Worth the Distraction is up there, the Shadowhunters/Mortal Instruments fic where I let Lydia Branwell befriend Jessamine Lovelace's ghost. Also Cinematic Healing in the same fandom, where I focus on Maia's friendships with various people, and the BBC Class fic Everything's Better With Cupcakes, which is about April and Tanya.

My most-read fic is A Treasure from the Trash, a Shadowhunters Malec dumpster baby fic (where the dumpster baby is a different one from the book canon, which I only learned about after I'd already started writing).

My least-read fic is Away from the Abyss. Which, yes, few people are going to read "Ran" fic 37 years after the film premiered, and fewer still are going to want to read Kyoami/Tsurumaru, two characters who barely interacted in canon, but I REALLY enjoyed writing it, and sometimes you have to write fic for yourself and the two people who end up leaving kudos/comments. I think the story came out pretty well, and as a bonus I learned a lot of Japanese history, which enriched my viewing of the film as well.

The WIP I most regret not finishing is... I mean, the Uma/Elle fic that's meant to be the third part in the Steps series is still stuck mostly inside my head and I want to get it out. As for stuff that's actually posted, I think Other Duties left off at an OK point, so I guess I'll go for older fare and say Birthdayverse Realities, an Angel AU fic.

My favourite gen fic is... I have so many. SO MANY. But okay, I will say The Big Four-Oh Will Be The Best One Yet, which is a Legends of Tomorrow fic about Nate's birthday, because I like seeing all these characters celebrating together, and it was fun trying to figure out which gifts everyone would give.

My crackiest fic is... *winces* Listen. there are other answers I could give that you might be satisfied with, but I know damned well which my crackiest fic is. It's my very first Yuletide fic from 2003, An Afterlife Afternoon in South Park. I figured that the only way to complete the assignment was to go all in, so that was what I did. I wrote a story in which Kenny's ghost blows Cartman.

And finally... Have a Christmas fic. For all that I've written a lot of Yuletide, I actually haven't done much Christmas-themed stuff, but The Winter Wall definitely qualifies! A gen fic for Michelle Magorian's Back Home.

Ask me a fic question! Or say something fic-related! If you want to!

[iwoulddieforienzo]

ienzo and vanitas study! im curious

HOKAY so I'm not sure I can give you a Study. per se. Because I personally don't really Understand Vanitas on a deep level and I tend to think of him in terms of what he represents(?) for other characters. BUT I WILL TALK ABOUT SOME THOUGHTS I HAVE ABOUT THEM. below the cut bc this got Long and Rambly

SO. the Big Thing that Vanitas and Ienzo have in common is their lives being completely and utterly dictated by The Same Guy. Mr. Xehanort himself. GRANTED Ienzo also had to contend with his shitty dad polycule but at the core of it all, they were both used and manipulated by a man who fully expected both of them to die, who wanted at least Vanitas to die, and lost any childhood they could have had in his infinite pursuit of Kingdom Hearts. Both of them were very, very young when Xehanort stole their identities and bodies and set them on a futile quest to get back what was theirs, all while working for/seemingly being at least partially raised by the man who killed them in the first place. Both of them are in a shaky, uncomfortable place at the end of KH3 (assuming that Vani reforms) where neither of them knows who they are or what they want. Neither of them knows how to be a person, and neither of them have ever really wanted to know, but they're being forced into it because all the people who controlled their lives, whether indirectly or directly, have completely fucked off, rejected them, died, or decided that they were going to be a Good Boy now. And neither of them can handle it!

Vanitas spent his entire existence desperately trying to re-fuse with Ventus. Vanitas would rather fade into darkness than exist independently. But now he has to exist on his own and contend with the fact that his entire being is based on someone who does not want him and everything he has ever done was futile. He's angry and tired and hurt. What scraps of an identity he built for himself were all based on spite and Ventus. So now what.

Ienzo, too, has never really had an identity. I think it really says something that Ienzo can't really conceptualize the idea that he was too young to have any fault for what happened at Radiant Garden. Obviously there's a couple reasons for that, but the one that's important here, I think, is that the only thing he had to define himself at the time was his intellect and the fact that he was, technically, a scientist. He ran around in a little lab coat and was involved in experiments; of course baby him thought he was a coworker instead of purely a ward. He was too little to have even figured out if he liked sports, never mind that he seemed traumatized even back then. Xehanort DID NOT HELP, and it is very likely that Ienzo was groomed by him. (not for sexual reasons, mind, just his utter loyalty). And then he was stripped of his heart and emotions for the next 10 years. All he knows about Ienzo is that he was a smart scientist who caused the fall of Radiant Garden, so that's who he is now that he's whole again. And this is an impression he got from the other apprentices, not any memory he has of being Ienzo.

Moreover, thanks to Xehanort (and basically every other Adult at the time) both Vanitas and Ienzo think that they're fundamentally broken in some way, incapable of ever being fully human in any meaningful way, and evil beyond saving. How they respond to this is different, of course, with Vani choosing to embrace being The Bad One as spitefully as he can while Ienzo just silently turns all his anger towards Everything inward.

So. Where does that leave them?

Vanitas, I think, would find himself infinitely frustrated by Ienzo's passive acceptance of everything that happened to him. Vanitas is bitter and angry, all the time. He's known that his life was messed up from the moment he came into existence, has hated his Master from the moment he was capable of it, but went along with the ride because he had an end goal and Xehanort, seemingly, could get him to it. I think he sees himself in Ienzo, willingly being strung along by whoever has grabbed his leash despite how he really ""should know better"" (in Vanitas' deeply questionable opinion). I think he'd also be bitter that Ienzo got to be whole again while Vanitas will never be whole (again, in his deeply questionable opinion) and how he seems to have his shit figured out (more than Vanitas, anyway). But I also think he feels a weird sort of.. kinship? responsibility? over this kid who is so much like him. He can kind of sense Ienzo's secret rage, and sympathizes (um. in a distinctly Vanitas way) with Ienzo's fear of keyblades. Buuuut.... hes also, just a little, frightened of him. Because Ienzo is powerful, and dangerous, and the only thing keeping him from being Zexion again is Ienzo's manufactured guilt and common decency. Vanitas could physically fight off any Organization member, but there's hardly anything he can do about illusions.

Ienzo, meanwhile, would probably like Vanitas well enough? Ienzo doesn't really let himself have opinions, not unless hes talking to his shitty dad polycule, so what exactly he thinks about Vanitas can be hard to extrapolate. But he does find himself mildly frustrated by Vanitas' inability to take responsibility for his own actions - Vani continues to struggle to see himself as a complete person and tends to blame others for the things he does. In a, "Ventus refused to fuse with me so all the pain I inflict on his friends is his fault" kind of way. (But of course, this comes more from Ienzo's need to take on responsibility for everything bad that happened ever rather than any moral frustration with Vanitas' actions) But, Ienzo's used to dealing with jackasses, and is more comfortable around rude assholes than he is kind and polite people, so he doesn't mind Vanitas' Attitude. Ienzo likes that Vanitas is so straightforward about what he wants, and doesn't bother having any secret intentions (unless he wants to start a fight). Ienzo, having grown up as a heartless creature of the Dark, is more comfortable with Darkness anyway. (And Darkness is more comfortable with him, but that's another story.) But Also. A very large part of him is Immoral Scientist so while hes trying VERY HARD to be Polite about it I do think he is tempted to strap Vani down to his vivisection table, and is generally fascinated with his existence.

On a nicer note I think that Vani met baby Ienzo, though I’m not sure when. Not for very long, probably just wondering why his floods were gently inspecting this kid and being inspected in return. I also think that they’d be very good friends. I tend to gently push the two of them together in aus when I can, and I think they’d be surprisingly good for each other!

Vani’s like “where’s your FIRE where’s your RAGE you were WRONGED, you should BITE PEOPLE ABOUT IT!!!” and Ienzo keeps him in check while also not trying to fundamentally change him or even really make him “nicer”. Vanitas, I think, would be very curious about the world once he reforms but weary of being around anyone associated with the Light, and he knows they don’t like him and it’s mutual, but that doesn’t mean he appreciates being hated everywhere he goes. But Ienzo doesn’t hate him, and in fact, seems to rather like him, and is happy to answer any questions Vani may have about anything. He doesn’t seem to want anything out of Vanitas other than to ask some questions about his existence every so often. Most of the time, my sort of.. headcanon, I suppose, though it’s more like a fun scenario, of how they meet again and become friends is that Vani sort of slinks around Radiant Garden for Light Warrior Reasons and Ienzo, who can smell him and therefore always knows when he’s nearby, starts sloooooowly gaining his trust by being overall very friendly and polite but keeping his distance. Vani’s like a weird, spicy little stray cat and Ienzo is metaphorically (but also sometimes physically) feeding him until he follows him home and refuses to leave. I think they’d figure out how to Person together, with Ienzo helping Vani discover what he is outside of Ventus & Xehanort while Vani pushes Ienzo into unpacking his emotions about his fucked up life and breaking free of his self-inflicted stifling of himself. They’re shockingly functional! (and also touch starved as hell and I like to imagine Vanitas randomly deciding to latch onto Ienzo and refusing to let go. Ienzo doesn’t even care he’s just like “hi Vanitas :)” and moves on with his day with a whole ass gremlin attached to him. They’re sillayyy)

Sorry for getting back to you late I completely passed out after writing the opening :,D hopefully this makes sense lol. boy howdy this is Long but I hope it’s at least kind of what you were looking for??

[alecjmarsh]

Bite, hunt, pirate

Thank you for the ask!

1. BITE - Who is your hottest OC?

This is such an unfair question, I intentionally make all my OCs hot because I get to write them through the eyes of people who are in love with them.

Kinsit is a strong contender though. She's butch, thick, muscular, and shows her love through smithing jewelry and weapons for her polycule. And she's an emotionally intelligent service top.

8. HUNT - What piece of media, excluding books, inspires you most?

Serialized TV shows. Despite not watching a lot of TV anymore, my tastes are still very informed by a childhood watching a lot of monster of the week shows (Buffy, Supernatural, arguably Criminal Minds). I love a little mystery and some banter.

I'm working on a project right now that honestly feels more like a TV series than a book? There's a lot of different characters and we're following them separately waiting for them to link up.

I also tend to end scenes on a zinger, commercial break style.

14. PIRATE - Which of your OCs is most evil?

Also an unfair question, I like making my bad guys selfish and awful enough that their defeat is satisfying. I also wrote several books in a row where the villain was the personification of the patriarchy so.

I'll go with Solomon Grey though, an absolute bastard of a vampire with thrall powers, so he manipulates people by convincing them that actually they do really want to serve him and hurt other people. He keeps his hands "clean" the whole time while his enemies torture each other.

He's also the character that made me go back and beef up my content warning list to emphasize that no, really, this is a dark book, read with caution.