#context: my ex is one of my best friends and they're on and off again with their toxic ex right now

[eribent]

i'm gonna try posting my thoughts on tumblr more bc it's more of an actual void unlike twitter

[beautifulfuckup99]

I NEED a pt.2 to college fvckboy Yoongi!!! ASAP!!!

You know I got you, girl!

Title: Those Damn Lips (Part 2 to 'Those Damn Eyes')

Warning(s): C*cktease!Y/N, Jealousy S!x, Talks of Cheat!ng, D!rty talk, Curs!ng, and FLUFF!

Author's Note: Hope you enjoy!

***********************************

"Are you gonna speak, or are you just gonna keep staring at me?" You finally ask as you keep your eyes glued to your textbook. The five-foot two girl with short brown hair and bangs sits up straighter, as if not expecting to have been caught by you.

You finally look up from your studies and eye the girl. "Mm... You don't know me, but my name is Isabella." She says finally, nose scrunching as if apologetic by that information she'd just shared with you. Completely unprovoked, mind you.

"Ok..." You say slowly as you sit back now, crossing your arms. "And that means..." You trail off.

"That means... Yoongi and I... Used to... talk." She says and you find yourself breathing heavy. Not again.

"And? What are you gonna do? Threaten me? Pull the 'he's not gonna treat you good' card? Try and act like you two are still talking?" You ask, unamused by this girl's presence.

Public dating Yoongi meant constantly being reminded of the fact that your now tamed boyfriend once had a past of being a reckless fuckboy. And there was no end to that fact.

After the frat party, you two agreed to actually try dating. Which was easy since you were still roommates as well, but the line of scorned ex-lovers was becoming tiresome for you.

"U-Uh... No! None of that. But... I just... Look, I should tell you-" You cut the girl off.

"Tell me that he's never gonna change, that I'm wasting my time, that night or day you can call him to hook up and he'd come running at the chance..." You recite, knowing the show and dance by heart now. It was messed up how many girls assumed doing this little speech to you would change your mind on Yoongi.

"Would you let me speak?!" She squeaks in frustration before fixing herself up a bit more. "I just thought that... From girl to girl? I should tell you... He's still talking to girls." She says and you snort.

"Honey. I read YA books for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I know this damn trick. You're gonna say this, probably show me a picture, and it'll be something taken out of context-" You're cut off by her showing the picture on her phone.

You pause to examine the picture and see it's Yoongi hugging some girl. They're somewhere off campus and they're in front of a hotel building together. Isabella swipes to the next photo and you see the girl, who you can't see the face of, being kissed by Yoongi on the cheek.

You shift in your seat, but don't let the confusion show on your face. Instead, you snort. "That's his best friend, dumbass..." before getting up. "Better luck next time." You say shortly before walking off, confused as to who the hell that girl was!

******************************************

When you get back to your shared apartment, you hear just how quiet it is and realize Yoongi must still be sleeping. You walk into your bedroom that he spends every night in now, only using his bedroom to work on projects or new songs.

As you watch him snore away, the anger of being confronted by yet another girl from his past takes over. You knew you shouldn't blame him for having a past, everyone did. But you hated that these girls felt they had the right to bother you whenever they wanted! And who the hell was that girl he was hugging in the picture?!

You shift your weight from one foot to the other as you continue to watch your boyfriend. Finally, a plan pops into your head.

You silently gather the supplies needed and get to work...

**************************************

You straddle your boyfriend and begin planting soft kisses along his shoulder. He hums, slowly stirring in his sleep and you smirk. "Baby..." You sing softly in his ear, and he hums again, a soft smirk playing on your lips as you begin nipping at his ear lobe.

"Mm..." He murmurs and slowly opens his eyes, smirking as he sees you on top of him in just your underwear. He goes to grab you and pauses as he realizes his hands are tied to the headboard.

"Whoa. This is a nice wakeup call..." He jokes, voice deep from just waking up. You hum in a false pleasant tone.

"You like?" You ask as you rub his chest and he nods fast. You move to his neck and kiss and lick different areas of skin as he shivers in pleasure.

"Baby?" You whisper as you softly grind against his bulge. It doesn't take long to get a full reaction from his 'friend', thank god for morning wood...

"Fuck. Y-Yes, honey..." He pants softly as you go back to playing with his ear, sucking softly on his earlobe.

"Do you like me?" You whisper as you pull back a bit to eye him.

"I sure do, baby girl..." He groans happily as he lifts his hips to press against you. You moan the way you know he likes.

"Yeah?" You pant as you grip his chest and sit up so he can watch you use his bulge, wetting his boxers the more you grind down.

"Oh fuck, yes, baby, get it wet..." He moans as his head rolls back.

"Yoongi?" You pant as you grab his chin. He looks up at you and licks those damn lips. The lips you'd become addicted to kissing, the lips that whispered sweet nothings to you while he played with your hair, the lips he used to kiss that girl's cheek!

"If you like me..." You stop grinding and move to his ear again. "Then why..." You whisper in his ear, voice soft and seductive. "Were you spotted... WITH ANOTHER GIRL?!" You snap in his ear, and he winces at the volume change. You sit up and cross your arms, glaring.

"What?! What other girl?! There's no other girl!" Yoongi says fast as he yanks at the scarves, to no avail.

"Oh? So, you weren't at a hotel yesterday, kissing some girl's cheek and hugging her?" You ask and he opens his mouth before closing it, as if realizing he was caught.

"Who is she, Yoongi? Hm?" You ask before grabbing a pillow to swat at his chest.

"Ow! Hey! Who even told you?" He asks back and you laugh humorlessly.

"Oh, that's the kicker!" You laugh sarcastically. "Some spiteful ex-lover that you played with before running off to me? Yeah, she showed me pictures of you and some random girl. You love messing around that much that you'd hurt ME, Yoongi!? What. The. Fu-" Yoongi cuts you off as you keep swatting him with the pillow.

"That's my sister!" He says and you glare.

"Sister?! That's the oldest trick in the book, Yoongi!" You huff as you get off of him.

"Y/N! I'm being serious! She's visiting from South Korea; I wanted you to meet her tonight!" He rushes out and you cross your arms as you eye him. "She's my twin sister. I swear. I'd never hurt you like that. I-I... I want this. This relationship, you, this... All of this. I love it. I-I love YOU." He rambles and you pause in surprise at the confession.

"I can prove it. Look through my phone. Call her yourself. That's my sister." He says and you keep your arms around your bare chest as you hum slowly, shifting. The original plan was to leave him tied up in bed with a boner, but the thought of you having overreacted kind of... Put a damper on things...

You grab his phone, playing it cool, still acting mad as you put in his pin and go to text messages, seeing the first chat log is labeled 'Sis' with a black heart emoji next to it. You click on the log and read a few texts that make it extremely clear this is his twin sister. Last text was from her asking what your favorite flowers were so she could surprise you with a bouquet when she comes over for dinner tonight.

"Huh. Uh... Well..." You slowly set the phone down as Yoongi watches you closely. "Still." You finally say, not wanting to admit any wrong doings in this moment. "I shouldn't have to deal with your gang of exes always bothering me!" You state and Yoongi huffs.

"That's not my fault!" He argues and you raise an eyebrow and set down the phone.

"It's not... You're fault?" You repeat and he nods.

"That's what I said. It's not my problem that girls are obsessed with me. Now let me out, Y/N." He orders as you hum slowly.

"I... I don't know. I don't think it's my problem." You state.

"Ha-ha. Funny..." He says sarcastically as he tugs at the scarves around his wrists.

"No. I'm serious. I don't think I want you untied just yet. I kind of... Like you like this." You smirk at him as you straddle him. He stops his tugging and eyes you. "You're so right. It's not your problem. I'm just your girlfriend, and I'm just getting harassed by your damn exes, but you're so right. It's not your problem at all." You state.

"Y/N, that's not what I mean-" You cut him off.

"But..." You say and slowly put your feet flat on the bed on either side of him with your legs bent at the knees. "If it's not your problem when I feel upset, then... Why should I make it your problem when I feel... Other things? Like... Horny." You say innocently.

"Y/N... I..." Yoongi pauses to lick his lips as he eyes the wet spot on your underwear.

"Yeah. If I'm feeling turned on... Why should I ask for your help? I can just..." Your hand travels down the front of your body slowly as Yoongi breathes shakily and shallow.

"Baby... Let me-" You cut him off again as your hand dips into your underwear.

"Mm... No. I can take care of myself..." You pant softly as you start to rub your own clit.

"Fuck, Y/N, that... That's not... Fucking fair." He huffs as he watches you closely with dark eyes. You smirk and focus on your own pleasure, grinding down on your hand as you gasp and moan, panting like a dog in heat. You were putting on the best show you could manage, just wanting to break the five-foot-nine, Korean man under you.

"Okay! Okay. Y/N, I'll handle those girls." Yoongi finally says as you remove your underwear seductively and softly press against his lower abdomen with a soft moan. "Fuck, you're dripping..." He groans, head going back into the pillows.

"You're gonna make sure they don't bother me again?" You ask innocently as you make Yoongi look at you.

"Fuck yes. I'm... I'm sorry they've been bothering, baby. I'm gonna make sure they stop." he nods fast as you sigh softly.

"It's stupid. I shouldn't let it bother me so much. You... Have a past. So what. But-" He cuts you off.

"But it does. And it should. But... Those girls were my past. You're my present, Y/N. And... hopefully you'll be my future." He whispers as he gives you gentle eyes. You pout a bit to fight off a smile.

"You're such a sweet talker..." You mutter and put a hand on Yoongi's face. "Fine! Fine, I'll... Be your future. As long as you don't give me problems in the present." You tease and he leans up to peck your lips. You sweetly kiss back before brushing your pussy along his cock, making it jolt a bit at the attention as he groans softly.

"Sweet talkers can get some lovin..." You mutter against his lips, and he groans happily.

"Bless you. Kind soul..." He whispers. It makes you laugh as you grab the sides of his face to kiss him. You slowly sink down on his semi-hard on, feeling it start to harden more as it snuggles between your walls. You shiver at the feeling and start riding him as he pulls at the scarves.

"Y/N... My hands..." He moans and you smirk.

"I said I liked this position..." You taunt as you bounce up and down, making him moan as he gives up fighting against the scarves.

"Fuck, so do I..." He groans as he watches your breasts bounce while you ride him. "Hop on my dick, baby. It's yours..." He whispers and you moan happily at that.

"Who makes you feel this good? Hm?" You whisper as you grab Yoongi's face so he's looking at you. He groans at your dominate side coming out.

"You! Only you!" He moans as he thrusts his hips up to meet yours, making your head roll back as your hands grip his chest, nails digging in. "Fuck, Y/N! Deeper! Dig in deeper!" He grunts out as you comply instantly, scratching his chest.

He hisses and moans at the slight pain all while you fuck yourself on his hard cock. "Mine! Mine! My cock..." You pant over and over as Yoongi moans your name.

"Fuck baby. You use it so good. No one can fuck me like you..." He whispers in a thick voice of pure desire and lust. The praise brings you closer to the edge.

"Yoongi!" You cry out as you cum, riding out your orgasm with a breathless giggle. The pleasure never got old...

"Oh fuck, baby. Little more. I-I'm so fucking close, baby..." Yoongi gasps as he keeps thrusting up and you smirk. You wait till he's right at the edge to pull off and jerk him, making him cum all over his stomach and some droplets hit his chest too. "Y/N!" Yoongi complains, always a fan of cumming on or in you. You laugh and smile innocently at him.

"Now we're even..." You taunt and get up, undoing his hands.

"Nope. Not yet." Yoongi says, grabbing you the second he's free. You squeal and he carries you to the shower. "You're cleaning up the mess you made." He smirks and you blush hard and giggle excitedly.

"Yes, sir!" You tease.

*************************************

Knock!

Knock!

Knock!

You jump a bit and breathe deeply to try and steady your head. "I'll get it." Yoongi says, getting up from the table where he'd been watching you set up dinner for the past half an hour already. You nod fast. To say you were nervous would be an understatement...

Yoongi had called his twin sister to come over for dinner to officially meet you and you just wanted things to go smoothly. You set down the bread bowl and then walk over to the front door where you see Yoongi hugging his sister. They pull away and the girl looks your way. You have to stiffle a gasp since this girl really just looked like Yoongi in a black bob cut with bangs wig!

You walk over. "It's so great to finally meet you!" The girl says excitedly, moving to hug you and you hug back, giving Yoongi a look over her shoulder and he chuckles.

"It's great to finally meet you... Uh..." You pause as you two pull away.

"Oh! My name is Yoonji." She says with a giggle and you chuckle before you can help it.

"Huh. Parents really had to think hard about the names, am I right?" You joke and Yoonji giggles at that. "Well... Welcome to our place, Yoonji. Come on in." You nod and she does just that. Yoongi smiles and pulls you close to his side as you walk into your apartment together...

[monsterfucker-lisa-swallows]

i've said before that it is completely out of line to look at a person recounting painful memories of childhood abuse and then bring up their past mistakes and i'm standing by that. i know some of you are going to jump on me for saying "mistakes" but this isn't me trivializing. this is me looking at things in context.

i haven't seen these supposed sources where they say drake bell's victim admitted to lying. i looked at news sources from the time and looked at statements given and haven't seen it anywhere in there that she admitted to lying, which i would assume would be front page news. if anyone wants to direct me to something verifiable that isn't part of a tiktok conspiracy, i would be interested. i have seen that bell wasn't convicted of actually touching the girl and they found no evidence of pictures ever being sent. the internet keeps vaguely saying the girl stalked him before and lied about her age and i don't know how true that is. it's always reprehensible to groom children and there isn't a justification for that. a few years ago i might agree with commentators saying "you don't just not know that someone is 12" but i worked at space camp for the past few years and there were a few times where i was looking for my assigned group and was told that the group that i'd assumed were 17 and 18 year olds (because they were taller than me and more muscular or filled out) were actually 12 and were actually my assigned group. idk what they're putting in the water but i assume it's these damn tiktok beauty standards. and i often have the opposite problem - when i was 16, people would assume i was 13. now that i'm 29, people assume i'm 19-14. i have a friend in her mid20s who is constantly mistaken for a 10 year old boy. it is fucking hard to tell how old someone is and if it's true that she was in his shows which were meant to be 18+ he'd have no reason to know her age. i've seen commentators state he immediately broke off contact when learning about her age.

i want to give benefit of the doubt in this case. i want to believe that the apology given was with complete accountability and remorse. imagining being in his position and realizing he may have contributed to an unsafe situation on par with one he himself experienced may have been a huge wake up call for him. i want to remind everyone though that we are not called on to forgive drake bell. we're not the wronged party in the case. the only one who can give forgiveness is the victim and victims do not owe that.

and with that i feel i should say that i can unfortunately believe that the domestic violence accusations may be true. the timeline seems to match up with the years immediately following what happened with him, the years he'd be more likely to flounder and struggle with the secret he was keeping. who knows what unprocessed trauma he was living with? it doesn't make it okay by any means (and again we are not the ones tasked with "forgiving" him and victims don't even owe that) but it makes a certain sense in context. i do think drake bell needs to come forward and tell people to stop attacking his ex on social media because come the fuck on. just because someone went through something horrific doesn't mean they can't do fucked up shit. i know i've done fucked up shit and i've worked through it as best i can. internet harassment and hate campaigns are not the way, but we didn't learn that lesson with amber heard (who i 100% believe sorry not sorry).

i think we need to move on from this mentality of holding people (particularly child stars) up on pedestals then dragging them down when they do fucked up shit. i have to believe people can change and grow. i'm willing to give people the benefit of the doubt so long as a pattern doesn't emerge. we need to move on from thinking that there is a "perfect" victim or that if someone has transgressed in later life that means their victimhood doesn't matter. we can mourn the child that drake bell was. we can mourn the child that amanda bynes was. we can mourn the person that all these people could be if they weren't swallowed by this cesspit. that is a separate conversation from talking about the ways they fucked up after coming out of that environment irreparably damaged.

leave behind the mentality that to show compassion for another human being is the same as "forgiving" them. and move on from the mentality that you personally are the one wronged when these people's lives have nothing to do with you.

[moetxt]

zhongven and zhongscara for the ship bingo (guess who this is 😏

i see you 👁️

ah, zhongscara...

for me, it started with mine and a friend's determination to have our faves kiss zhongli, but i only got further enabled when someone else pointed out parallels i didn't even see initially. i'm proud to be one of the 13 people who ships it 😁

though, to be honest, i really prefer them in a non-romantic context. in my eyes, they're friends with a compatible worldview and REALLY REALLY compatible kinks. scara would never admit this to his face but he sees zhongli as one of the precious few people in the world competent enough to dom him. meanwhile, on zhongli's side, he enjoys very much how scara lets him do what he does best, to the fullest; most people wouldn't be able to handle it, after all.

i think romance is the one major thing they disagree on. scara with his trust issues cannot COMPREHEND how zhongli is still willing to put his whole heart into loving someone even after getting hurt multiple times in the past.

now... you knew this was coming.

zhongven my BELOVED!!! they've been happily married for 2,000 years. they have an angsty on-again/off-again open relationship thing but neither of them thinks it's enough and also they get jealous. they've been mutually pining for millennia to the point that there is plentiful evidence of how down bad they are for each other in both their countries' mythology/folklore/traditions/ancient artifacts/archaeological sites but they've never once actually admitted they're in love with one another. as gods, they can't love as humans do and as divine manifestations of their elements and ideals, they're natural opposites locked in an eternal stalemate of courtship; can't tie down the wind, can't whisk away the earth. they've divorced at least 300 times. they're bitter exes and ei is the only one left alive who can tell you all about it (she will not).

unlike other ships i've been obsessed with in the past, it's hard for me to remove zhongven from their canon context, or at the very least a context where they are still divine/immortals. the divine opposites thing is just so key to me—they way they shouldn't get along, they shouldn't understand each other, but nonetheless they do. also, exploring edge cases of locality-specific or occupation-specific dual worship that occurs when morax's and barbatos' domains meet. like, how ancient northern liyuens knew to scatter dandelion seeds along with their prayers to make earthquakes during the spring and summer go away because it was probably the geo lord sulking and missing his beloved. or how sailors whisper a prayer or two to the god of wind for safe travels as where rex lapis' domain does not extend, they instead hope for the protection of his "bride" :)

actually, i am writing a whole fic about this! it's an epistolary-styled story filled with outsider accounts of how morax and barbatos just keep popping up, directly or indirectly, in each other's mythology. it's also about zhongli intentionally messing with the historical record in attempt to bring more of this to light because he's sulky about venti not visiting him for 500 years lol.

but yeah, the gods aspect is quite important to me and my view of them is so specific that i tend to be picky when it comes to fics, especially if they are AUs.

finally, as you know, i have more than a couple of crack theories/shipper delusion when it comes to zhongven and wider genshin lore. (descender zhongli and shade of istaroth venti my beloved!!!) namely, that venti warned zhongli about the cataclysm beforehand due to his god of time/celestia connections, but didn't warn the others, and that's why there was a near pantheon wipeout and the tsaritsa hates him now while zhongli carries so much guilt. also, that zhongli retired godhood at least partly due to venti, leaving his country to the humans (just like venti had done all along), and because he regretted how he always prioritized work and didn't treasure what he had until venti disappeared for his 500y coma.

"the end of godhood" is a really fascinating concept to me, as is what their relationship could turn out like in the future. they aren't gods anymore, but they're not exactly humans either, and no one else can really understand them like they understand each other. a lot of the obstacles in the way of them being together are now gone, but they now also carry new scars. i have a fic vaguely drafted centering around this too.

hehe, thanks for giving me the excuse to talk at length about them! 💞

[biblicalhorror]

Zaylor Midnights, Part II

And we're back! If you haven't yet, please peruse the disclaimers I covered in Part 1.

Let's jump right in!

8. Vigilante Shit

Here's where we start to get some more Catwoman vibes on this album.

"Cat eye sharp enough to kill a man"

Also some generic Gaylor lyrics:

"I don't dress for women / I don't dress for men" Oh so you're bisexual? Okay got it. Case closed.

"Picture me thick as thieves with your ex-wife"

Also the implication she fucked Scooters wife is too funny to not mention. She loves a divorcée ;)

9. Bejeweled

Initially I was fully prepared to write this one off as a song about Jake or John or even Calvin and therefore irrelevant to Toë, but holy crap is this MV gay as hell.

Opening, of course, with the scene where Laura Dern satirizes the concept that a proposal from a prince being "the best thing a girl could hope to achieve"

Note this Kravitz quote from the earlier GQ article:

We'll come back to this later.

Anyway, Taylor plays Cinderella in this music video, who rejects the proposal from the prince (played by Jack Antonoff, who has the same initials as Joe Alwyn), impresses the Princess (played by Zoë Kravitz) with her burlesque routine she learned from queer burlesque icon Dita Von Teese, and ends up taking the castle for herself.

Basically, another song that has nothing to do with Zoë but is extremely gay (in context of the music video, at least)

10. Labyrinth

I go back and forth on this song. I've heard other people theorize that it's about trying to end a relationship and then falling back in love with the same person again, which I think is a totally valid interpretation. It could be that.

However! It sounds to me like it's about the feeling of finding yourself falling for someone new and your traumatized brain is so focused on what could go wrong that you get completely ahead of yourself and start mourning a relationship that hasn't even started yet. Taylor is a Cancer moon, which is a moon sign that is deeply introspective and retrospective. The "labyrinth of my mind" could be referring to the twists and turns her mind takes to convince her that every relationship will end in catastrophe based on the way past relationships have panned out. Past becomes present becomes future in this song. Maybe it's about finding her connection with Zoë after the fallout from a Karlie or Lily breakup? Maybe Joe cheated on her and she found comfort in the arms of Zoë and they became a polyamorous couple? Who knows.

11. Karma

EDIT: I've found some articles claiming Zoë is a songwriter on this one and others that do not mention her. I believe there was initially a mistake on the Apple Music pre-release info, so for now we'll say she's not in a fact a cowriter for this song.

Taylor Swift clearly has a complicated relationship to gender and womanhood. Many of her friends called her "king" in their 2021 birthday posts:

In Dear Reader, she explicitly refers to herself as a "cursed man."

Queer women also tend to have complicated relationships with gender due to heteropatriarchal society. Some lesbians and queer women use he/him or they/them pronouns for any myriad of personal reasons. It's not too far-fetched that these women could possibly call each other by male pronouns/adjectives sometimes.

Zoë had this interview where she talks about High Fidelity, identifying more with male roles because they're often written to be more complex and nuanced due to misogyny in film/tv, and how passionate she is about how "women can be fuckboys, too"

"Karma is my boyfriend" but also "Karma is a queen" >>> "Karma" is both genders and neither gender. (Note: Zoë has a tattoo of a crown on her finger)

"Sweet like honey, Karma is a cat" First of all, that's pussy babe

Also, these two stone cold weirdos apparently have the same method acting technique:

"Flexing like a goddamn acrobat, me and karma vibe like that"

What else could "flexing like a goddamn acrobat" refer to other than Zoë playing a superhero famous for her acrobatics (and/or Taylor being in Cats (2019))

these two weird Sagittarius girls love to simply vibe together as cats or otherwise

"Karma is the guy on the screen coming straight home to me"

Not "Catwoman of my dreams" but "CAT WOMAN OF DREAMS" this girl is horny as hell and loves dreaming about women

Sweet like JUSTICE = another batman reference, of course

12. Sweet Nothing

Written by William Bowery who we think could be Zoë

Zoë also lived in London from 2020-2021, she could possibly have gone on holiday to Wicklow (in Ireland) after filming for The Batman wrapped

Taylor made her meals throughout covid isolation and a birthday dinner in December of 2020. Nice to Have a Friend in your pods with you, huh ladies?

Also, remember when Zoë crossed the picket line for the Oscar's party and then made a "joke" about the Will Smith situation being uncivilized? This is a song about a couple of out-of-touch insanely rich girlies who just Can't Be Bothered and also happen to be in love

Speaking of which, if this is in fact a song about Joe Alwyn, it's a (pretty) lie. "All that you ever wanted from me was nothing." Being in a relationship with Taylor has gotten him movie/tv roles, a Grammy, etc. He's gained so many accolades just by being associated with Taylor. If he doesn't want any of that, why does she keep jeapordizing her own image as an artist to get him awards? Zoë likely genuinely wants nothing from Taylor because she's been famous her entire life. She doesn't need Taylor to pull any strings for her to get roles or accolades.

13. Mastermind

This song is Taylor being very tongue-in-cheek about how this lover she's been singing for four albums about is actually a target she decided on long ago

Starts with a hand touch in a crowded room (obvious Gorgeous reference), that Bowery hangout did look awfully crowded, didn't it?

Dominoes cascaded in a line >>> hair falls into place like dominoes (Gold Rush)

All the wisest women had to do it this way / WE were born to play the pawn in every lover's game (as in, WE women are forced to play these roles)

Two lines that could reference Zoë's tattoos:

"I'm the wind in our free-flowing sails">> Zoë has several pirate themed tattoos

"And the liquor in our cocktails" >> "être toujours ivre" (always be drunk) tattoo

-----

And that's it for the 13 original Midnights tracks! Part 3 will be looking into the 3am tracks.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

[spidersmiceandeverythingnice]

POTENTIALLY HOT AND BAD TAKE ABOUT NUANCE AND SJM WRITING INCOMING -

Tbh people bring this up as a knock against Rowan's character - "He PUNCHED Aelin!!" - but like the reasons I disliked Rowan had literally nothing to do with that because Aelin absolutely deserved it when he punched her in the face.

The context of that scene is that Rowan is not a human. He's not presented human, he doesn't act human, and the narrative doesn't treat him as Aelin's equal in any conceivable way. It is established very quickly that Aelin is a punk ass nineteen year old (who is depressed and dealing with it by being abrasive and cruel and pushing everyone away from her) and Rowan is an extremely powerful, dangerous immortal creature who has been fighting and killing in wars for centuries, and doesn't conform to human sensibility. He doesn't like Aelin and resents the fact that he's been ordered by his boss to put up with her.

And then Aelin looks Rowan dead in the face and tells him that his people deserved genocide.

The Fae in ToG were massacred. They're rare - Rowan is a member of an endangered species. And now this obsentially human kid who he is being forced to deal with is telling him that he, and many of his friends, loved ones, and other kin deserved to be hunted down and slaughtered for No Reason.

So, yeah Rowan punched Aelin in the face. And she deserved it. That's a downright horrific thing to say to ANYONE let alone someone who is canonically a genocide survivor anyway. She also said it on purpose because it was the worst thing she could think of to provoke him - which, again? Not great, considering that she's nineteen and depressed and he's meant to be her teacher in this scenario. But Rowan didn't randomly decide to attack Aelin. And once the pair of them decide to mutually stop antagonizing one another in Heir of Fire they actually do manage to form a strong platonic bond.

There are a ton of reasons to dislike Rowan mainly because he's ultimately boring and after HoF ends, any of the nuanced or interesting parts of his character are removed and it turns out that his only personality traits are being obssessed with Aelin and wanting to bang her - but idk, the punching thing is fine as a plotpoint. It's problematic because it's meant to be. It feels like an organic character interaction, and the relationship develops from there - literally, from rock bottom. And as it stands, that's actually fine! I don't hate this kind of writing.

The problem I have with ACOTAR is that a similar situation occurs.

It's Tamlin at the High Lord meeting. Is what he said to Feyre objectively bad? Yeah, sure, objectively but also? Feyre just ruined his Court and directly caused the slaughter of his people. (Hybern repeatedly thanks her for removing Tamlin as an obstacle to their conquest.) Tamlin is now dealing with an invasion and a refugee crisis because he tried to help someone he loved. He believed that he had rescued Feyre from a dangerous situation (ACOWAR contains a really bizarre passage where Feyre admits to lying about being raped, and then gets mad at Tamlin and Lucien for believing her). Feyre went behind his back to ruin all his work as a spy because she randomly decided that the best time to revenge herself upon him was during an active war situation. And if I were in his shoes - looking at the person I once loved who has now betrayed me in every conceivable way, dressed head to toe in actual diamonds and married to the man who had sexually assaulted her in front of me, because he was jealous of me - I wouldn't be handing over the classified intel i painstakingly gained as a spy, while trading pointed barbed insults about my ex-girlfriend's sex life. I would be literally biting heads off of necks. So, I say, fair enough. Tamlin gets a free pass here to say whatever he wants - in fact, for a guy whose supposed to be infamous for his horrible temper, I find him to be remarkably restrained! Notably, when violence breaks out - its the Inner Circle who are responsible for it.

Of course, they're immediately absolved. Zero consequences. In fact, their violence was helpful and makes people trust them! God damn it.

Anyway SJM IS capable of nuance - except that in ACOTAR, she doesn't do anything actually interesting with it and seems keen to remove nuance from her books as soon as possible whenever she does stumble across it.

[starwalker03]

So now I have to ask. WMLP au where the team had a poly thing going before they were separated. (Everyone made out that new years and didn’t stop for a few week) What would change?

Okay so the thing about this ask is I read it, loved the concept, thought about it for more than 0.00000001 seconds and took psychic damage from it and then put my phone down and walked around the house a bit and I've been putting off coming back to it since.

So sorry about that.

But look. I'm one of those people who loves the interesting dynamic of ex-lovers. Irregardless of what type of love. Platonic, sexual, romantic, anything in any capacity, best friends, work buddies, soulmates, married couples, friends with benefits, all of it. Because once there was a time you were something to each other. Once you laughed and cried and talked and had stories and made stories. Once upon a time things were good and now they're not. And neither of you know how to fix it. Or worse, you know exactly how to fix it but simply refuse.

It's why I love making Dick and Bruce's relationship so complicated and difficult and somehow still functional but not in any way that is simple or straightforward.

But in this context. Oh god.

Imagine you are a teenager. 14-17. Mid teens. Everything is difficult already but it's worse because you're a hero. You're responsible for the lives of so many. You're a soldier in an endless war and there is no easy answer. And you have a team you love. Five people you would lay down your life for, you would stand between them and death, and you know they'd do the same for you. You stand in front of one, another stands in front of you; a circle of you all interposing yourselves between your loved ones and danger in an anti-Oroborous. Backs to one another and trusting you will be guarded.

And it's not enough.

Some of you die, some of you are taken where you'll never truly be heard from again, you are at the whims of the enemy and there is no presence at your back, no familiarity with who stands in front of you anymore.

And when you see them again the circle is broken, you cannot get close, you don't understand what happened to these people you once knew inside and out. They look different; you look different. Part of you wants to trust they would still stand by you at the end of the world and yet you look in their eyes and a flash of fear runs through you: you can't find it in yourself to put your back to them again.

Part of you blames yourself for it. Part of you thinks you're responsible. Part of you thinks you could fix it. Part of you is horrified at what they let themself become. Part of you is mad at them for letting you become what you are. Part of you is ashamed. Of yourself, of them, of everyone else.

Nothing is good anymore and it makes you wonder: was it ever really good to begin with? Were you all just lying to yourselves? Was this inside them, inside you, all along? Was this always how things would end? Was the clock ticking down to the day you'd hold a weapon at them, pointed, accusing, scared, angry, hurt, desperate. For them to back down, stop, finish this, finish you.

Was there ever a point at all? Was it all wasted?

Are you wasted?

Are you...

Who are you? And who are you to each other?

And why is the answer... Nothing?

[likeabxrdinflight]

I don't quite know what to do with the changes happening at my old church.

For context I still have connections within this community- for better or worse I was raised in a small town with one catholic church and one catholic school, so I knew all the regulars reasonably well. And if I didn't know them personally, I at least knew of them. So it's been impossible to totally cut myself off from that orbit. My best friend's parents are still involved, a lot of my old classmates that I'm Facebook friends with are still involved, one of my parents neighbors are still involved, and I'm still good friends with one of my former teachers, so it's like. Even though I've cut off most of the family I haven't cut off all of them, if that makes any sense. This isn't like being an ex jehovah's witness or ex fundamentalist evangelical where leaving the religion means leaving behind the entire community.

Anyways. This church was always problematic. This church was always political. I grew up under the thumb of catholic dogma. One of my teachers was a bit of an extremist. Like...this place had problems. It caused harm to me and there's a reason I left it. I want to make that clear.

But my god it's getting so much worse lately. The diocese brought in this new young guy to be the parish priest when the old one left and he is just...I mean I haven't met him myself and frankly I hope I never do, but from what I hear he's just...terrible. and even from my distanced position I can see the impact he's had on the place.

For example, the social media pages are much more active now with a younger person heading them, but not in a good way. It's being used to spread further propaganda- and much of it is political. There is an obvious conservatism to it now that wasn't the case before. The church I remember was much more politically neutral. Yes it had certain moral positions, typically around abortion, but it certainly never told parishioners how to vote. None of the priests I grew up with would have dared. Now though? The damn Facebook page outright says what way to vote. This new priest wrote an article in the local newspaper explaining why he was voting the way he was in a recent special election- presumably knowing that was going to influence people.

This kind of thing never happened when I was a kid.

That's not even getting into the way he's fucking up the school itself- implementing some gross catechesis of the good shepherd program and removing all aspects of secular education. Again, this is a school that objectively hurt me. Religion was baked into it, indoctrination was already happening and it was quite robust. But the education itself was, broadly, a good one. But that wasn't good enough for this guy, I guess. So now they're dialing the religious side of it up to an 11 and killing the actual academic experience in the process by removing secular educational standards.

It's like....this new priest is taking something that was already pretty bad and making it so much worse. And sure, I'm on record as saying I hoped the school got what was coming to it...but not like this. Not by ripping apart the aspects that were decent and sinking further into right wing christofacism. Not by sacrificing kids' education on the alter of indoctrinating them even further. I wanted the school to eventually close because not enough people were willing to subject their kids to a religious education. I didn't want this.

...and I haven't gotten into the weird split in the community now between the people who are offended by this new priests implication that they weren't already doing catholicism right vs the people who are on board with his bullshit. I'm not really on either side there but if it means ousting this dude from the parish I will gladly support the people who are against him. If it means restoring the school and the church to the previous status quo rather than let it deteriote into...this...I'd set aside all my scruples with the church as it was. If it means that kids only have to deal with the shit I dealt with and not something fundamentally worse...I mean, lesser of two evils right?

I dunno...I'm feeling a lot of things about it and about the way this priest is behaving.

[singofsolace]

Some thoughts on Vicki and Robert

I rewatched Queen America last night for the third time instead of letting myself think about the impending funeral of my friend, and even wrote a fanfic that probably no one will read because I'm four years late to the party, but I'm incredibly drawn to Vicki Ellis as a character, and I genuinely can't control what inspires my brain to start writing and what doesn't.

Anyway, what I wanted to talk about after seeing this show a third time, is that it's not a secret, even within the universe of the show, that Robert and Vicki have a toxic relationship, right? It's heavily implied, and even outright stated, that they are in an endless cycle of getting together, having angry and sometimes violent fights, followed by rough sexy times, and then breaking up, only to eventually get back together again, even when they're both actively in healthier relationships with other people. But because I don't have any knowledge of Oklahoma's geography, I never understood one of Vicki's digs at him until I looked it up just now.

In episode 9, when Vicki and Robert are beginning to fight, Vicki says, "I remember the time you drove all the way to Norman because you found out I was sleepin' with that O.U. [Oklahoma University] guy."

Robert responds: "Well, that was back when you had a 22-year-old's ass, and I'd do anything for that."

Obviously, from context, even someone who doesn't know where Tulsa is in relation to Norman would understand that they're far away from each other, and that he must've been pretty darn jealous and possessive to be willing to go that far to follow her, but now that I looked it up, I'm like... wow. Two hours? He drove two hours to Norman because he didn't want her sleeping with another guy? That's...that's a lot, right? Like, Vicki complains about having to drive to Okmulgee in the first episode, which is only 45 minutes away, by comparison.

Vicki also provides the context that she didn't tell him about the guy she was seeing; he must've done some "digging" to find out. So this man did some digging and followed his presumably ex-girlfriend to a town two hours away, just to...what? Break them up? They don't really tell us in the show what he did, but since Vicki knows about him following her, I assume he confronted her and they got in one of their famous fights that ended in sex.

Something I'm also interested in is that Nigel clearly knows about all of this toxicity, and usually doesn't comment on it, because it's Vicki's business... but when he originally brings up the fact that Robert is back in Tulsa, even though he says he "didn't mean to upset [her]" by doing it, he absolutely intended the revelation that Robert is back in town to throw Vicki off enough that she'd stop criticizing his own romantic choices. But throwing her incredibly toxic and unhealthy relationship with a man in her face just to get her to stop talking about his own choices was a low blow, even for best friends who frequently call each other out, and what's more, is that he realizes that he's gone too far almost immediately, and while he doesn't exactly apologize, he acknowledges that he upset her.

Similarly, after Vicki runs into Robert at church, Regina immediately says, "Are you alright?" in an uncharacteristically compassionate and knowing tone. It seems like everyone who has known Vicki long enough to know about Robert is also aware that even just mentioning him, or in this case, seeing him at church, is enough to upset her.

What's remarkable to me is just how...normal...Vicki is with the chef instead? Like, before she tries to babysit his kid, she and Andy have an incredibly healthy relationship, by comparison? They communicate openly, and whenever Vicki hears herself saying something she shouldn't (like when she says he'll never make a name for himself with only one restaurant), she immediately apologizes. He seems genuinely worried for her when she leaves their dinner date early (ostensibly because she feels sick, but actually, seeing Robert has so thoroughly thrown her off that she can't stay), and when Vicki says, "You don't have to be so nice to me all the time, you know?" he insists that he wants to be nice to her, as if there isn't any other way of being, in his mind.

I don't know, I just find it fascinating that it seems like Vicki and Robert really do bring out the worst in each other, because Vicki manages to have a relatively healthy relationship with another man at the same time that she's showing her worst colors with Robert? She's so unused to all the kindness in her relationship with Andy, in fact, that she outright states that Andy being so good to her makes her "suspicious," which is a pretty classic sign of having been in a manipulative or emotionally abusive relationship in the past.

I just have a lot of feelings, I guess, about the fact that Vicki has so rarely known kindness, even/especially within her own family (I mean, Katie literally punches Vicki in the face in the very first episode?? Right after Vicki spends a whole afternoon being insulted by her daughter niece?!), and she seems to be fighting a constant battle against everyone around her, except for maybe Nigel.

I just want to wrap Vicki up in a blanket and keep her away from all the people who are constantly hurting her 🥺

[unbecomingsposting]

hi hello better with you (5, 6, 9, 10)

let me down easy (1, 3, 4, 11)

false alarm (4, 5, 10)

xoxo your friend @serviir

Better With You

What part was hardest to write? Oh man. I think any conversation that either of them ever has with someone other than each other is always impossible with soran, for me. Like having to write sonny talking about lindsey at all, to anyone, including kelley, is so painful to write, idk why. probs bc she would rather die lmao

What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics? i think this is one of the only soran fics ive written besides the established relationship ones where a lindsey sexuality crisis is not even remotely involved which makes it different and imo better in some ways

Were there any alternate versions of this fic? no i don't think so. there usually aren't alternate versions of my fics in general i end up writing exactly (more or less) what i said i was going to. it flickers being the biggest, hugest exception lol

Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story? bc they're stupid enough to 1) break their brains thru mutual masturbation and 2) communicate about their hookups via tinder instead of just fucking texting each other. rose is too direct for that i think in this context where they'd already have gotten off in the same room. and kelley certainly is lol

Let Me Down Easy

What inspired you to write the fic this way? I wanted to write like as close to what I could imagine could be a semi-realistic story of them hooking up in France during the 2019 wc and like...figuring it out

What’s your favorite line of narration? Emily wants to stand on a podium with Lindsey in Tokyo more than she wants Lindsey to love her back.

What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

“Are you gonna kiss me?” Emily asks stupidly, and Lindsey freezes.

“Um,” Lindsey says, “I was gonna try.”

What do you like best about this fic? i like kelley in this fic a lot lmao. i also really like the confession scene at providence park

False Alarm

What’s your favorite line of dialogue? this made me realize there's like. no dialogue in this fic? lmao. anyway:

“Can I kiss you?” Lindsey asks.

It’s so simple. A question either of them could have asked in France, in New York, in Hawaii, countless times in Portland or on the road.

Emily doesn’t say yes. She says, “I want you to.”

What part was hardest to write? the end, as you know i never like the ending of any fic i write, with it flickers once again being an exception lmao

Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story? i wanted to write the soran story more comprehensively than i had, taking lindsey's ex, sweden, utah, etc. into account

[leafiion]

i was having trouble with tiempa after swapping around my mons and decided to elysian shield + calm mind and sylveon easy swept. thanks sylveon you fix everything around here. also got a lucky break with domain shift on spacea after a second try and got sent to misty field so double thanks to sylveon

UM. did spacea just blow us up

wait okay whys she grey. oh shit is this Zeight:tm:

what. go away . oh is that evil karma? evil karma eye?

sorry the word "system" in context of games makes me immediately sick. UM ELEVATOR TO HELL..

damn thats TWO mentions of axel by aevis now and like, one of aevia. bros before hoes

AUGUGHHGHGGHGUGH AEVIS LOVES ME. AEVISSSS MY BEST FRIEND AEVIS

da gang's all here.. except aelita frowny face. and alexandra she got cut off by the screen pov

wjat... password was pokemon rejuvenation... haiiii??

damn. geara got hit with the fuckification beam then? no actually im pretty sure its still vitus' fault. hmmm

gwat... missing exe... melia :3? or MEEEE--dies

zwygarde... wait if vitus has yveltal then what the FUCK is madame x doing. is madame x the third one actually. maybe maybe not but if she is thats stupid bc shes bad at it

can we delete them.

huh<3<3 wait then who is Evil Karma. is all karma like varied is Evil Karma also Good Karma

crescent spits facts as uh.. well . not as always. as always since we became friends. oh shit is that unedited music like just straight up pmd music.

MY ZETTA METER REACHED FULL CHARGE AGAIN LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM STILL INSANE OVER THIS GIRL PUT HIM BACK PLEASE??? WHY IS HE STILL IN THE POKEBALL..... LIKE YEAH I GET THAT IT MIGHT "COMPLICATE THINGS" BUT HE IS. A GUY. LIKE HES A PERSON.

i said my thoughts about this before but i still think this is weird unethical and uncomfortable and is most of why i dont really know how to feel about crecsent. like its dehumanizing BEYOND just the nim -> lorna pipeline and idk how to express it in words. like. HES A GUY. he might be a pokemon but hes still 100% a person and his whole situation is really fucked . you still have him in a pokeball and youre like 100% FINE with this?? and WE'RE supposed to be 100% fine with this???? this is a human/human-adjacent rights violation that makes me unable to properly sympathize with crescent on almost any level adn the fact that everyone else is like "okay idc" because he was evil makes it worse. i can condone AND endorse murder but i draw the line at whatever the fuck they're doing.

anyway xara adn clear moment. ithought they were Dead. but whatever i Guess

[silentexplosive-diary]

2/13

So the last time I posted was the 4th, and honestly, so much has happened and also absolutely nothing has happened at the same time. I haven't had time to come here and rant about it, but I've been sitting on this in my brain for a few days now.

Today is Tuesday, the day before Valentine's Day. My partner and I got into a little fight on Saturday, our first fight actually. We're fine now, but I'm just going to summarize it for context.

So my partner was fired from their job a few weeks ago and spent a week looking for jobs and applying before they got hired. Turns out, they're now working as a solicitor and making commission instead of salary, so it's not a very stable job. I thought from the start that it was shady, but I did my best to be supportive and just keep my negative views to myself, as I always do in any given situation. My partner throughout the week would give me updates on how their day went, and someday last week, they had the cops called on them twice and a gun pulled out on them. They're fine, but was a little shaken up due to having PTSD from being in the military.

That was kind of the last straw for me with this job. Then came Saturday night, when they're supposed to come over to my place and spend the night so we can spend Sunday together when we're both off. I usually cook us dinner and we just hang out and spend time together.

They warned me beforehand that they were going to be late, but gave me no specific time. I texted around 5, they said they were still going to be late. I texted again around 7:30, they're still out there knocking on doors. By this point, I've talked to my mom who I live with about what I should do and if I even wanted them over anymore, and I've texted my best friend about it to try and sort out my feelings about this. I end up texting my partner that maybe they should just go home since it's so late and my dinner plans were ruined at this point (since dinner was going to take over an hour to make), and after two more hours, my partner texts me that they're just up the street.

They make it to my house around 10pm, and they can see that I'm clearly not happy. After getting them inside and locking back up, I start to talk to them and explain why I'm not happy, the main reason being that it's dangerous to be out and knocking on stranger's doors to sell shit at fucking night. I then said I wanted them to look at other jobs since this one was shady, and I pointed out details about why they're shady that I won't disclose here, and my partner heard me out, and apologized, which honestly shocked me.

This brings me to the thoughts I've been having for the past few days since we made up and are good now.

They listened to me. They apologized, more than once. And I mean an actual apology, not just a half-assed sorry. They promised to do better so I wouldn't worry or be stressed out, and I felt that they meant it. I'm not used to that.

It's no secret that I was in an abusive relationship about a year or so before my current one. My ex was a cheater and a liar all around, and I was too blinded by what I thought was love to see it. They used me to cheat and I just saw it as affection, then they cheated on me and I didn't find out until we were over. They would lose their temper and blame me, depsite taking it out on me, and their "apologies" were always manipulative as fuck. Always "I'm just a horrible person and you deserve better," or "I don't know what you want from me, everyone expects things of me."

So to now have a partner that actually listens and wants to do better? It's crazy to realize it. I was standing there in front of them, listening to them apologize properly and tell me how they were going to do better for me because they want a life with me, and I was immediately back to telling myself that it was a lie, because all previous apologies I was used to were lies. I had to convince myself to trust my current partner and remind myself that they are not my ex. These are two very different people.

So, yeah. That's what's been circling my head the past few days. Might tell my partner about it when they're back this afternoon. Who knows.

[thecoddaughter]

GUTS as QSMP

Hey, yall! Quinny back with yet another album breakdown. This time: Olivia Rodrigo's 'guts'

(read below the line <3)

song: all-american bitch

characters/context: jaiden and baghera, general characterization

key lyrics:

“I pay attention to things that most people ignore” “And I am built like a mother and a total machine. I feel for your every little issue, I know just what you mean” “I forgive and I forget” (hahaha yeah they forget a few things… like their whole lives!) “I don't get angry when I'm pissed, I'm the eternal optimist I scream inside to deal with it, like, "Ah"”

song: bad idea right?

characters/context: foolish about mariana (only in the meme sense, i swear…)

key lyrics: 

“Yes, I know that he's my ex but can't two people reconnect? I only see him as a friend. The biggest lie I ever said!” “And I told my friends I was asleep but I never said where or in whose sheets”

song: vampire

characters/context: baghera about the federation 

key lyrics:

“I used to think I was smart but you made me look so naïve. The way you sold me for parts as you sunk your teeth into me!” “You're so convincing… How do you lie without flinching?”

song: lacy

characters/context: foolish about jaiden and cellbit being the federation’s favorites

key lyrics:

“Aren't you the sweetest thing on this side of Hell?” “Like perfume that you wear, I linger all the time, watching, hidden in plain sight.” “The sweetest torture one could bear” “Like ribbons in your hair, my stomach's all in knots. You got the one thing that I want.” “You poison every little thing that I do”

song: ballad of a homeschooled girl

characters/context: jaiden, general characterization (i kinda wanted to put juana but this is more funny)

key lyrics:

“Cat got my tongue and I don't think I get along with anyone” “I broke a glass, I tripped and fell. I told secrets I shouldn't tell. I stumbled over all my words.” “I laughed at the wrong time, sat with the wrong guy. Searchin' "how to start a conversation?" on a website. I talked to this hot guy, swore I was his type, guess that he was makin' out with boys, like the whole night. Everythin' I do is tragic. Every guy I like is gay.” (she’s literally in a qpr with a gay couple but still funny to me) “Don't let me out at night! I'm shocked I'm still alive!”

song: making the bed

characters/context: dapper, general characterization

key lyrics:

“Want it, so I got it, did it, so it's done. Another thing I ruined, I used to do for fun.” “I thought it, so I said it, took it 'cause I can. Another day pretendin' I'm older than I am.” “Push away all the people who know me the best but it's me who's been makin' the bed.” “And every night, I wake up from this one recurrin' dream where I'm drivin' through the city, and the brakes go out on me. I can't stop at the red light, can't swerve off the road. I read somewhere it's 'cause my life feels so out of control.” “They're changin' my machinery, and I just let it happen.”

song: logical

characters/context: idk????? Part of me wanted to but fit and spreen but I know nothing about their relationship.

key lyrics:

song: get him back!

characters/context: (i want put 4halo again but i shouldn’t so you are getting nothing. Listen to the song still its a banger)

key lyrics:

song: love is embarrassing

characters/context: badboyhalo and forever

key lyrics:

“And now it don't mean a thing! God, love's f-----g embarrassing” “And I consoled you while you cried over your ex-girlfriend's new guy. My God, how could I be so stupid?” “I placed my bets and it's not worth anything. I give up, give up but I keep comin' back for more!”

song: the grudge

characters/context: slime to mariana (i’m mean, sorry! this is in the context of juana)

key lyrics:

“I have nightmares each week about that Friday in May. One phone call from you and my entire world was changed.” “You took everything I loved and crushed it in between your fingers and I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did but I hold on to every detail like my life depends on it.” “And I know in my heart hurt people hurt people and we both drew blood, but, man, those cuts were never equal.” “But even after all this, you're still everything to me and I know you don't care, I guess that that's fine.”

song: pretty isn’t pretty

characters/context: leonardo, especially the day before being taken

key lyrics:

“Bought a bunch of makeup tryna' cover up my face” “'Cause there's always something missin'. There's always something in the mirror that I think looks wrong “You can win the battle but you'll never win the war. Fix the things you hated and you'd still feel so insecure.”

song: teenage dream

characters/context: eggs, general characterization

key lyrics:

Pomme - “When am I gonna stop being wise beyond my years and just start being wise?” Leo - “When am I gonna stop being a pretty young thing to guys?” Dapper - “When am I gonna stop being great for my age and just start being good?” Richas - “When will it stop being cool to be quietly misunderstood?” Tallulah - “And when does wide-eyed affection and all good intentions start to not be enough?” Dapper - “When will everyone have every reason to call all my bluffs?” Ramon - “And when are all my excuses of learning my lessons gonna start to feel sad?” Chayanne - “Will I spend all the rest of my years wishing I could go back?” JUST IMAGINE THEM SCREAMING THIS LINE: “​​Oh, they all say that it gets better. It gets better the more you grow. Yeah, they all say that it gets better. It gets better, but what if I don't?”

[tweecrushconfessions]

the last text that i sent my ex was "I'm on the toilet."

It's Lev here, today, I thought I'd share something a bit more personal - a tale of my latest romantic adventure...or should I say, misadventure? You might want to grab some popcorn for this one, it's gonna be a wild ride. (I wrote this so I can finally move on & forget - for the better! I reflected it on the whole thing, yesterday.)

Alright, story time. You know how some people say their last words to their ex were something profound, like, "I wish you the best," or "I hope we can still be friends"? Well, mine was, and I kid you not, "Hey, just sitting on the toilet." Classy, right? Yep, you read that right. Toilet texting. If that's not an Olympic event, it should be.

But let's add some context to that bizarre send-off, shall we? Trust me, it was less of a cute "we share everything" and more of an unhealthy "you're not giving me enough" sort of thing (and we were pretty much the opposites). It's like we were from different planets. Money, food, music taste, humor - I mean, he thought the things I made were CRINGE. Now, that was the ultimate deal-breaker. And then, like a cherry on top of this disaster sundae, my notifications stopped working. Yes, I swear on my mom's homemade stew, it wasn't me ignoring him. (I mean, come on, it's not like I was chilling in a spa - I just couldn't reply for a hot 5-20 minutes. We're not running a crisis hotline here). Everyone knows that my notifications are as reliable as the British weather, and even if it were, did he really need to know about every piece of toilet paper I was using?

After much reflection, I decided that it wasn’t working out. The relationship didn't survive much longer after that text, thankfully.

But hey, don't get all somber on me. The breakup was a blessing in disguise. Honestly, I'm doing better than ever. I feel like a weight has been lifted, and I've found a newfound freedom in doing things just for me.

And guess what? The music? Yeah, it's playing loud and clear now, without any background noise of criticism. I'm living the indie-pop dream!

So, in retrospect, that breakup text while I was on the throne (I mean, the toilet) might be the funniest and most symbolic thing I've ever done. In a weird way, it was the beginning of me flushing away a relationship that wasn't serving me anymore. And, guess what? There's a new guy! Let's call him Mr. Tolerant because that's what he is – tolerant and understanding. He doesn't cringe at my zines (he actually thinks they're cool!), and is on the same wavelength about important things. Sometimes, it's essential to step away from situations that make you lose your essence, your flavor. Once you find yourself again, you can share your life with someone who loves your version of weird, because let's be honest, we're all a bit weird.

And note-to-self, if you ever find yourself having to text someone while on the toilet just to keep them happy, it's probably time to hit the flush button.

Until next time!

[lamnwar]

Hello!!! I have a knb request!!! Could I please request an aomine/taiga (separate or you can do just one I don't mind!) x reader where the boys have recently been dumped and is now with the reader who's trying not to feel like a rebound and second choice (maybe they're good friends with him and have been for a while and has just been pining away?) but it looks like he might get back with his ex? You can decide how it ends!!! Thank you!

Hiiii omg thanks for the request, love 💕 I chose to write on Kagami only since I've never written an OS on him, so I hope that's ok; it's also kinda a college au (not requested but hope it's not a problem)! Anyways, enjoy it :) xx

It just makes sense // Kagami Taiga x gn! Reader

Context: when you comfort your best friend after his break-up, you surely don't expect things to take such direction for you two...

Warnings: kinda hurt/comfort, best friends to lovers hihi (bc it's my fav trope 🤭), mention of alcohol but it's not important to the plot, very fluffy <3

“I’m not gonna tell you the cliché stuff like... it happened for a good reason, or you deserve better. Although you do, you know, things shouldn’t suck like that for you.”

Taiga hums softly, as you look at the stars. At this early hour of the morning, they’re more apparent, somewhat calming despite the context you’re in. Not long ago, you were woken up by your phone ringing, your best friend’s number appearing on screen. It isn’t a rare occurrence – you’re used to receiving calls at such hours when he’s had a glass too much. But this time, he called for another reason.

“Drunk at some bar again, Taiga?”

“Can I come to your place?

And here you are, both of you sitting on your little balcony in silence. It really sucks, this whole situation. Break-ups happen to everyone, yet they’re still one of the most heart wrenching things that can happen to someone. Even a bright guy like Kagami is no exception the rule. Though, you’d argue that it doesn’t make sense. He is, from all angles, the perfect man. But maybe you are biased, maybe his ex saw things in him that you ignore...

But no. It doesn’t make any sense to you.

From the day you’ve first met him, you’ve been convinced that he’s one these people – the ones that you can only love because despite their flaws, they encompass everything great about being human. Taiga is the guy you’ve met on orientation week, bonding over nothing and progressively becoming attached to the hip. Somewhere during your times together, between dumb college students’ shenanigans and growing as adults together, you’ve noticed your heart beating faster around him. You aren’t dupe, well aware of what that means. But back then, it only made sense for you to keep your feelings for yourself, hoping that they’d eventually fade away before it ruined your friendship.

But right now, you wonder if it was the right thing, not to confess to him. Best case scenario, it could have prevented the current events. He wouldn’t have met that person; he wouldn’t have his heart broken. You wouldn’t do that to him, never.

“You know, I kinda saw it happen” his deep voice resonates.

You turn to him, an eyebrow raised.

“Yeah?”

“I think... I didn’t love them anymore, or enough. Not sure, but it was bound to happen.”

You can do nothing but nod, understandingly. There’s nothing to say to that, and you doubt that he wants your opinion on the matter. Anyways, you risk making things worse for the both of you if you talk too much.

After a while sitting in silence, you get up, stretching.

“Do you want some tea?”

Your best friend hums his response, and you go to boil some water, preparing two cups. Somehow, in the soft light of the moon, Taiga’s sadness takes on a new dimension. It is almost poetic, a tragic beauty that you cannot take your eyes off. But at the same time, you wish not to see that spectacle for too long; you’ve never witnessed him after a break-up, you have no idea how long it takes for him to grieve his past relationship. Some part of you wish it won’t take too long – you want to see him smile again soon; the other part believes he should take all the time he needs, albeit a whole year, if needed. In all cases, one thing will remain the same on your side of things…

“I’m here, y’know, for anything.”

“Anything?” he repeats, looking in your eyes for the first time since he’s come to your place.

A warmth invades your inside as you gaze into his sadden irises. You really don’t want him to be like that for too long.

“Yeah, anything.”

*

  Two months have passed since that night. And from a day to another, the Taiga you’re used to came back. It started with his smile, every time he’d greet you. Then his laugh came back – adorable, brightening up your surroundings while it resonated around. And finally, he’s become his usual laid-back self, the one that would spend endless hours of doing nothing and simply enjoying the little things with you. And all this time, your heart has kept beating faster. Faster, and faster, and faster. You’ve feared at some point that you had some health issues, only to realize that no matter how deep down you think you’ve buried your feelings for your best friend, they will always resurface every time he’s a little too close to you.

It doesn’t help that he’s spending more time with you since the break-up. You’re to blame for this, telling him that you were here for anything meant what it meant. For all the time he felt lonely, confused, or just exhausted by the event, he’s come to you. Naturally, you haven’t turned him down, not that you wanted to. Regardless of how you feel, he’s always going to be your favourite person. So it only makes sense, the coffee in the mornings, the commutes to university and work, going to his matches to cheer on him and celebrating in bars, which ultimately ends with the both of you sharing a bed for the night, because it’s way too late for either of you to go back home all alone.

It only makes sense, that he’s come to sleep by your side for other reasons too – because he’s wanted to cook diner for the two of you, and he’s ended up enjoying himself so much that the prospect of going back to his empty home made him want to stay longer with you.

“Diner at your place tonight? I’ve found a new recipe I wanna try.”

And once again, you can’t get yourself to say no.

“Sure, do have all you need?”

He shakes his head, hands digging in the pockets of his jacket.

“Gotta do some shopping first.”

“Let’s go then” you say, turning in the direction of the nearest grocery store.

He nods, following you. You can’t remember when this has become a habit for the two of you – somewhere between the first week post break-up and now, you’ve come to do casual things in his company, yet somehow enjoying yourself more in these little moments. There’s nothing special with watching him decide which cheese he rather choose for a specific dish, looking at him examine veggies under all angles before buying them, and you deciding what drink will best suit your diner. Yet, here you are, carrying the basket for the both of you, which has to be the most mundane thing ever, but you are, at this very moment, truly happy. As you stop at the drinks, searching what you’re looking for, a strange feeling invades you. Taiga stands beside you, and from the corner of the eye, you can see a smile draw itself on his lips.

“What you’re smiling about?” you ask.

The tall boy’s cheeks inflame, caught in action. He cleans his throat, hands in his pocket.

“Huh? Nothing.”

It’s your turn to smile. You’ve known him long enough to be able to tell when he is lying. Taiga isn’t very sly, which has its charm in some ways. At least you know that he is always honest with you.

“Come on, you can tell me” you taunt him, still looking at the drinks.

For a moment there, you believe that he won’t say a word but before you turn to him with the intention to get the truth out of him, he finally opens his mouth.

“I find it kinda cute, that little face you make when you choose the drinks.”

You turn to him, mouth agape.

“Huh?”

“Y’know…” he raises his shoulders, “you pout a bit, like… anyways.”

You keep staring at him, incapable of wording a response to what he just says. Inside you, every cell of your body combusts, feeling a rush of everything coursing through your veins. And you don’t really know what it is with this moment – this ordinary moment, that could have happened any other day – but what you’ve been bottling up for so long menaces to spill out. As you blush furiously, your hand goes to get a bottle of your chosen beverage, eyes incapable of maintaining any eye contact with Taiga.

“I like you, you know” you let out, voice shaking.

You don’t have to say more for him to understand what you’re communicating. You refuse to look at him, fearing his reaction. But if you do actually raise your eyes to his face, you’ll probably meet a sight that you’ve never seen before. There is something particular in Taiga’s eyes, something so strong yet so sweet. It’s indescribable, and neither of you are capable of understanding it. As the situation goes way beyond your comprehension, it only makes sense to him to act on instinct. You feel his hand join yours one the handle of the basket, not a single word being uttered between you as you both move to the cashier.

The next thing you know, you are back to your place, fingers intertwined in Taiga’s. The whole thing seems surreal, but feeling the heat of his palm, you know that you aren’t dreaming. It is weird, but at the same time, it isn’t quite absurd. When your hands finally separate, you look at your shaking fingers, incredulous. Taiga has found his natural place in your kitchen, while you stand there, still trying to calm your frenetic heartbeat. And when you finally calm down (as much as you possibly can, that is), you walk to him.

“Hey Taiga” you speak up, gathering all the courage that you have.

He looks at you, a faint blush on his cheeks. There is something incredibly innocent in his gaze, and you feel your heart melt at the sight. He really can’t deceive you, can he?

“I just want to know… uh, about-“

“You wanna know if I like you back, don’t you?” he cuts you off.

You nod, feeling the blood rush to your cheeks. He smiles, drying his hands in your kitchen towel. You wonder how he looks so calm compared to you; yet, you know that he isn’t unphased by the situation either. He is more tender than usual, a bit of shyness in his behaviour that has you believe that he is certainly affected by your confession earlier at the grocery store.

“I think I like you” he finally lets out. “At least, it makes sense to me if I do.”

“Yeah?”

He chuckles softly, eyes evading yours. It isn’t often that you see him so vulnerable, but it feels good to know that he’s allowing himself to show himself under such light.

“I don’t want to make things complicated by overthinking it but… if you’re up for it, we can give it a try.”

You smile, though on the moment you can’t quite grasp the reality of things. After all this time of being secretly into him, he finally reciprocates your feelings. It sounds like it comes right out of your own dreams, something that isn’t meant to be true, but it is. By the time you register the information, the tall boy is only mere centimetres away from you, hands once again holding yours. You look up, heaven in your eyes.

“Can I kiss you?”

He laughs, before muttering a soft yes. And as your lips touch his, all these sleepless nights where you tried to kill your feelings, all the times you felt guilty for the way your heart would run in his presence, and all the times you avoided his eyes and left his smiles unanswered so you wouldn’t send the wrong message – all of it, gone, like millions of ashes in the open sky, in a kiss you’re been hoping for too long.

*

 Taiga and you being together is one of these things that just makes sense. Family and friends alike agree on that statement, very few of them being surprised by the officialization of your relationship. Though it still makes you blush from time to time, you’ve grown more casual about it. Some moments still seem unreal, regardless. Whether it be waking up next to him almost every morning, or catching him looking your way with affection, it all seems too good to be real. A part of you struggles because the way things happened went way over your head. As much as you don’t want to doubt something that you hold so close to your heart, moments of uncertainty strike every now and then, and you bottle it up; just like you’ve bottled up your feelings for your best friend for the longest time.

And recently, doubts get the best of you even more, since your boyfriend is now working together with his ex. You don’t want to be the insecure significant other, the one that cannot trust and deems themselves unworthy of the love their receiving. But you’ve been there all this time Taiga dated his ex. You’ve seen them, you’ve seen the sweet kisses and the shared laughs, the warm hugs, and intertwined fingers. And more importantly, you’ve seen the state in which Taiga was when he broke up. An image of sadness that you wish never to see again, but putting aside the way you felt about it, you realize that he wouldn’t never have been so devastated by something that was meaningless to him.

“Things are good between us now, you know, since we’re working together.”

He confesses out of habit, getting used to tell you about everything and anything. Unbeknownst to him, you wonder in the depth of your soul if he’s not considering going back to them.

“Of course, it’ll never be the same, but I guess we can be friends, right?”

His words frighten you. Despite what he’d said the night of the break-up, you know he loved them. Be it enough or not, love is still love. While you admit that the concept is debatable, to you, love never dies – it’s just one of those things that keeps changing but it never disappears.

“Hey, you’re listening?”

Taiga’s hand waves in front of your face and you blink a couple of time, escaping your thoughts.

“I am” you simply reply.

A silence sets as you feel him observing your face. Just like you’ve come to know him by heart, he has the same ability to read you. The tiniest, most insignificant things are noticed. He takes some time but eventually, some of your thoughts are read on your face. You can’t tell what has betrayed you, but he knows. You deviate from his gaze – a bad old habit of yours, born in a tentative to protect yourself.

“I’m with you, you know that?” He speaks.

“I do” you respond confused as to why he’s stating the obvious.

He shakes his head, pulling you closer to him. A surprised look on your face, you try to understand what is going on.

“No, I mean…” he stops, taking his breath. “God, I’m so bad at talking about these things! I’m trynna say, I may get along with my ex but regardless… they mean nothing to me. Not that I want them to mean something either. I’m just glad there’s no grudge held anymore.”

Arm wrapped around your shoulders, he raises his eyes to the sky, looking at the same stars that were there when he came to you heartbroken. He ignores if they remember him, if they remember the way he looked that night – on the verge of tears yet uncapable of crying; but right now, he hopes with all his heart that they’re aware of how much he’s happy now, and If he ever has to cry in front of them again, it’ll be out of love for you, and you only.

“I told you that I thought we broke up because I didn’t love them enough, do you remember?” he asks you.

“Yeah.”

He lightly laughs before turning to you.

“I thought about it a lot and I actually didn’t love them the way I should have. Truth be told, I loved someone else that way back then. And I still do love that person like that. That’s why it wasn’t meant to last.”

You look at him, still confused and growing tired of not understanding the point he’s trying to make.

“Taiga, please, go straight to the point” you plead.

“It’s you, dummy. I loved you back then, subconsciously, yeah, but I still did. And I love now. I’m meant to love you, whether you want it or not.”

Oh.

For a moment, you remain speechless. This was not what you expected, let alone imagined. For as much as you’ve loved him, you never envisioned a reality where he would feel so strongly about you. but…

Enough with the buts. Enough with the doubts. Enough, enough, enough.

“Taiga?”

“Yes?”

You cup his face in your hands, taking him by surprise. Round eyes look at you, as you smile, holding back tears.

“I really love you.”

He snickers, hands joining yours.

“Thank god you do.”

It just makes sense, that he loves you as much as you love him. It only makes sense, that all your doubts seem suddenly baseless. It just makes sense that all this time, you were meant to be.

[purble-turble]

Okay so I’ve seen Star Vs and what makes the Blood Moon Ball and the ex boyfriend (his name is Tom) comparison to Bad Peaches work so well is that when the episode introduces him Star immediately goes “nope”…

But then he apologizes to her for his history of being a jerk, stops himself from getting mad at her friend for kicking his hand off, proves he’s been going to therapy and shows off his soft side with his new therapy bunny to win her over… and then her friend tries to force himself into her business instead of letting her handle it and makes her mad…

And it’s such GREAT manipulation and a perfect example of a toxic ex sucking you back in (before he became a good guy and they started dating again for real), and works great for Dark Shadowpeach.

Because YEAH, SWK is MK’s mentor, and thousands of years older then him; it’d probably be annoying having your student get so up in your love life, and it’s so easy to focus on the good of a relationship as time goes on…

And I think Macaque would think that so long as he changed temporarily, he could get SWK back to the way he was BEFORE his journey, and have them be eternally bonded forever.

You could also add a wee bit more of a dark spin and say that Macaque thinks if they’re permanently bonded, SWK is going to be stuck with him, and he’s successfully forced him into an situation where he has to be his number one priority….

There’s just. My dude.

There’s s o m a n y ways this could be taken to be extra dark (or lead to Mac being less of a creep, but I like him best as that weirdo ex who SWK shouldn’t talk to).

Thanks for the extra context! Yeah that is definitely the kind of plot Macaque would try. He's already proven he's really good at tricking people into thinking he's a nice and helpful guy at least in the short term, so he'd have an easy time of tricking MK into being on his side in this romantic spat they're having... he probably even uses MK rooting for them to get back together against them both by like getting MK to make Wukong go with him to the ball to just give him another chance.