#dean winchester x friend!reader

[green-typewriterz]

Some Kind of Animal, Cannibal

Sam Winchester x gn!reader

Summary: You and Sam get lucky when trying to find the missing people…the luck being you both get taken too.

ASK: N/A

Warnings: angst with a happy ending, illness, injury, refusing to eat, kidnapping, cannibalism, talks of feeling sick, it’s basically all angst, early seasons Sam (3-4)

Author notes: VERY INSPIRED by Possibly in Michigan - Animal Cannibal, Reader is smart and took criminology in college. loosely based off of season one episode fifteen, I thought of this when talking to myself at 12:03 am as any good fic writer does.

word count: 4012

The three of you had been in the small town of Bayfield, Wisconsin for almost a week now and still barely anything had come up about the seven missing people. From what you had figured out, there was a sort of pattern; they were always taken at night and it was always in pairs.

Dean assumed it was a demon, but something didn’t feel right to you. Demon’s were vicious, masochistic, it didn’t make sense for them to take a person and not parade the kill about the town for all to see. Sam thought it could be a vamp, maybe even a rugaru, but you weren’t sure.

”How’s the research goin?” Dean asked nonchalantly as he walked back into the damp motel room, a bag of beers and snacks in his hand. You looked up from your uncomfortable position on the bed with an exasperated look and Sam leaned back on his chair. That was all the answer he needed. “So we’ve still got no clue at all?” He continued, turning to look at you, “and you’re sure it’s not a demon.”

You shook your head, “not completely, but it just doesn’t make sense for the profile.” Sam smiled slightly as you spoke; you could’ve been an FBI agent (meaning you probably would’ve ended up crossing paths anyway) but instead you chose the hunting life. Despite this, the criminologist in you snuck out sometimes, something very useful to the two. “If it were a demon, it would be an outlier, one who had either devolved or worked differently.”

There was silence for a while and Sam sighed, pulling his hands through his hair. It was getting longer now, the tips of it tickling his jawline  every so often. “What if they’re human?” He began, “nothing about this screams monster.” Sam turned to look at you, wanting your input.

”Well what would you prefer, a monster who we know how to kill, doing something we’d expect, or a human, who may be completely insane, doing this purely because they can.” Somehow the second option seemed scarier to the three of you.

Time passed the three of you in comfortable silence, interrupted only by the low humming of MTV reruns coming from the TV Dean had put on. Sam was the first to fall asleep, leaning his head gently against his book. Dean followed soon after, his ability to fall asleep pretty much anywhere was something you had always envied. This left you in a half-awake stupor, trying to get some last few moments of research in before falling asleep like the two boys in front of you.

Eventually, you called it quits and closed your book, heading over to Sam to do the same for him. You gently replaced John’s diary with a small pillow and were placing Sam’s coat over his shoulders when you heard a crash outside. This area was known for raccoons but the noise sounded too loud to be an animal. You shook Sam awake and pulled the knife from your waistband, preparing for whatever might be outside.

Sam blearily looked over at you, standing up quickly despite the tiredness that clung to him when he saw the look in your eyes. He followed soon after, his gun firmly in his grip as the two of you walked out the door.

It was almost impossibly cold outside, the mist of the early morning clinging to your clothes. You pulled your jacket closer to you and turned round the corner into the alley, both of you with weapons raised. “Are you sure it wasn’t just a drunk guy?” Sam asked tiredly as he slowly lowered his gun. You shook your head in confusion and turned round to face him.

”It could’ve been, but something just…felt off.” You replied. It had always been impressive, your intuition - Dean had called it witch-adjacent. Neither of you were concentrating on your surroundings, talking quietly between yourself when Sam’s eyes widened and he went to raise his gun again. Though, you didn’t get a chance to fight back as pain bled through your skull. You fell to the floor as the sharp crack of Sam’s gun went off and the final thing you saw before darkness clouded over your eyes was Sam’s unconscious figure beside you. 

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖ng 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙

This is where you are now, waking to an unbearable pain, cold metal stinging against your skin as you come to your senses, your body racked with shivers. You sit up slowly, trying to adjust to the darkness of the room. The only light that streams through was from a dirty, mould ridden window that tints the area with a sickly green. You can hear the sharp breaths of another person from across the room and small, pained cries echo across the dark every so often. “Y/n.” The voice whispers, out of breath and harsh. You move slowly, eyes flitting across the darkness to find the source of the voice.

Sam sits in a cage of his own, hands harsh against the iron bars. His hair is damp and slick against the side of his face, face hollow and pinched from the fug of the basement. “What the hell is going on?” You reply, voice sharp from sleep.

You can see the surroundings through the thin strips of light, sun warping itself around cracked glass - it was day. “I don’t know. You’ve been asleep for a while, maybe three days. God, I thought you were dead.”

Silence spreads like a cancer. It’s been three days. Where was Dean? Did he know you were both gone? Did he care? Of course he did. You push the thought from your mind and move across the cage, hands clasping cold metal. The area wasn’t tall by any regard and you had to crouch to walk across - you felt bad for how uncomfortable Sam must be.

Eventually, you reach the other side where Sam was sitting and look at him with the same, unnatural quiet. He reaches a shaking hand across the space and clasps it over your own. He is cold, hands sweaty - though you find that you don’t care. You and Sam had always been close, leaning against one another during research or allowing him to plait your hair (and you to him if he was stressed). You run your hands over his in repetitive, soothing motions and lean your head against the rusty metal.

Sam sighs, though you aren’t sure of the emotion behind it. His hands work over your knuckles, almost as if he was massaging them, though he moves away quickly when a door opens at the top of the stairs. It shines a new light in, one that’s warm and forgiving - it feels like a new world.

Eager heeled footsteps click down the endless stairs and come to rest by a third cage, her hands laying on the side as if it were simply a wall. “Thank goodness, I was wondering when you’d wake!” She speaks cheerily, hands now clasped together. The caged woman edges closer to the light, you can see a shining, silver cross necklace resting against her chest, the metal contrasting against her dirtied skin.

There’s an almost silent click and the door in front of you swings open, creaking and worn. Sam is first to exit, his hands being chained to a small lead she holds in her palm. You felt like a dog, some kind of rabid animal she was trying to tame. She leads the three of you up the stairs, metal chains clinking miserably against your wrist.

The two of you look around your surroundings, surveying every corner, crack and door with a pinprick precision. You can see Sam’s hand instinctively move to his waistband - though you know there’d be nothing there. The three of you are led into a small dining area, lit with the homely glow of candles. You could almost laugh at the difference.

Lori, as she had introduced herself, sits you down with a smile and places a plate in front of you. It’s warm and suddenly reminds you that you haven't eaten in a while. You share a wary look with Sam and lean back in your chair, you’re not an idiot.

The girl opposite you, a tangle of sinew and bone, eats silently, hair withered and face gaunt - God knows how long she’s been here.

She’s pretty, she would’ve been. The girl has a sharp hooked nose and deep brown eyes, skin dark and warm. But she’s lost her hope, and with hope goes will, strength and livelihood. Though beauty seems to have stayed.

From her, you come to the conclusion that the food wasn’t poisoned, but you don’t want to test it anyway - you won’t accept food from someone who kidnapped you.

The room is quiet, the only sound being the crackle of candles and the repeated scrape of a fork on a plate. 

It’s a winding path to sleep, something Sam doesn’t seem to be blessed with any more. His hands shake in yours, his eyes screwed shut. This is you, sitting, waiting for the path to end, withering resolve and aching eyes. This is you, standing on the shoreline as Hero - a goddess' daughter - as your Leander’s searchlight dims. This is you, letting time slip from your fingertips like golden blood.

The routine continues like a paper mobius strip, one that’s tearing. There’s an end, you can see it carving itself into marble - but it’s an ending you do not want for Sam.

It’s in this routine now, that you wake, hold a slowly succumbing hand in yours, refuse to eat and you hold Sam’s hand once more. It’s made you think more than you’d like, about time. About stories. Sam shivers, almost like clockwork now. His shirt is baggy against hollow bones and the tattoo on his breast seems wilted, like it won’t offer protection. He whispers too, short sentences you can never grasp.

The only word you’ve ever understood is a drawn out, yearning, “Please.”

There had been an offer of treatment, of safety. But Sam had seen to have found a sanctity in his suffering, he tells himself it’s a blessing, reminding him his limbs still ached, his body still yearned. Sam spits at the feet of his saviour and is rewarded with a harsh whip-like slap across his cheek.

He crumbles, rocks slipping from a cliff face, and grows still. “Sam?” You whisper, afraid. You were afraid most days now. 

There’s a moment, then a breath and you lean forward to brush the hair from his eyes. Dean would know what to do - he had always known. Instead you hold his hand again, there’s not much else you can do.

The woman in the corner weeps. It had been the first time she had dared to make a sound, perhaps the violence had scared her.

“Oh, my dear.” Lori speaks soothingly, smiling with bared teeth of mock sympathy. “Come along, let’s calm you down.”

The words feel like an attempt to cajole a scared kitten, but the glint in her eyes shines radiant in the dark. You and Sam don’t see the woman again.

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖ng 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙

“Where do you think he is?” Sam asks, leaning against the bars. A welt has risen on his face and a large cut streaks across his angled cheek from Lori’s ring. He looks like a corpse, a victim of an illness that never stops taking.

You don’t reply, he nods. Every so often, Sam holds your hand, rubbing your palm with his thumb, and you’d be Hero once more, seeing Leander for the first time at the festival. Though, he lets go eventually (he always did) and as he pulls away, his livelihood drowns - searchlight fading.

In the evening, careful hands guid you up the stairs once more, careful not to touch the raw skin around the handcuffs. Hunger picks at you, stretching your skin over your bones. You look at Sam, allowing a mournful sigh to escape from you. The both of you are dying, it’s something you have accepted, but you can’t bear the thought that he’ll die before you.

You’ve listed every single thing that changed in your mind, every time he shivers, every time the bags under his eyes darken. Maybe it’s become a way to cope. The both of you sit and Sam’s near shoulder length hair falls in front of his eyes - it was an indication of how much time has passed. The both of you have no choice tonight, you have to eat.

This was the choice. You sit, silent, and know that you are giving in to the final piece of defiance you have. You watch while self-loathing washes over Sam’s face as he too is forced to make the same choice, his body weaker than his mind. This is the choice; let go of your morals. Or die.

It’s almost funny how quickly morals leave you in the face of death.

You find there’s no way to delay it either. You have already analysed every movement of Lori’s. Every breath is calculated, every smile is vicious and hungry. So, with one final look toward your closest friend, you bite into the grey meat, the taste of something akin to pork overwhelming you. It’s stringy, but it still tastes like the best thing you had ever eaten - perhaps it was the amount of time you had had in between meals. You take a bite of the mash on the side and feel something cold and metallic in your mouth.

You breathe in sharply and sit in place, slowly moving your hand toward your mouth. There’s a moment of emptiness before your realisation, a stillness as you hope the silver cross necklace you had pulled from your teeth did not mean what you thought it did. You release a shaky breath and hold a hand to your mouth, feeling sick to your stomach.

You had eaten her.

“Sam.”

The whisper is almost inaudible. You’d never spoken at the table before and, though it was allowed, you feel as though you’re breaking a rule. He looks up and his eyes widen, seeing how quickly your face has paled. You look down at the plate, then back at him, shaking your head in a warning motion.

It’s only now he sees the necklace in your palm, pieces of dried blood sticking to it. Lori hadn’t even bothered to clean it - she had probably meant to throw it away. You lean back in your chair, looking out the window to your left and seeing how the trees stretch for miles past it, leaves heavy with snow. You weren’t sure when it had snowed. You try not to cry.

“Are you alright dear?” Lori asks, tension cutting across the room. Your head turns slowly, tears falling down your cheeks like hot tar, eyes wide, sucking in quick breaths. Sam seems scared - you look animalistic.

You hold up the necklace. “Did you make us eat her?” Your voice is unnatural, toneless and uncaring - a stark difference to the look on your face. Lori smiles. All she ever fucking does is smile.

You stare silently, face set with fear as she approaches, placing a manicured and veiny hand on your shallow cheek. You turn your head to the side, but her hand never leaves your face.

“Did you enjoy it?” It almost wasn’t a question - not when she knew the answer. You turn back to face her and her hand moves across your face, coming to rest by the corner of your mouth.

If you were to be treated like some kind of animal, that’s what she’d receive. You bite down hard, ignoring the scream as your teeth carve through her finger. You get to bone and pull, degloving the skin and muscle from her finger and holding it in your mouth like a dog. Then, just as she looks back to you, you spit it onto your plate with an almost smile.

Sam looks at you with an unreadable expression. You meet his eyes, ignore the feeling that settles in your stomach and simply reply, “We’re done with our meal.”

Lori pushes you down the staircase and into one singular cage, being in too much pain to open each individually. This is your plan. She closes the doors and snaps the keys. This is your plan.

Sam is withering, flu-like and scared. “Why?” he asks quietly, moving from your arms. “Why would you do that?” his eyes are wide, begging. Tears litter his cheeks. He’s given up thinking there’s a way to be saved. He’s grown accustomed to dying behind rusted metal bars.

You don’t reply and with blood stained lips you kiss him, trying to offer reassurance. He returns your kiss with a sigh, his pained fever making his skin hot to touch. He leans into you, hands holding your waist as if you’d disappear. You pull away and cradle him, gently brushing shaking hands through his hair. You kiss his forehead every now and then, staining his skin with darkening red.

Everything about you is strangely calm. You don’t fear Lori, not now you have seen her bleed. She could die. She would. You fall asleep almost smiling; she would, she would.

Lori wakes you in the early morning, hand bandaged and face stern. There’s no more smiling. Thank God. Your confidence chipped at her, annoyed her. It’s your turn to smile now. She unlocks the cage to move you to your own - you knew she’d had a spare key, she loved theatrics. As soon as you stand to move to your own cage you sprint, knocking her to the floor.

You knew you would’ve won, but weak monsters always bring a weapon when they feared the Hero the most. Though, you refuse to be Hero. There is no Leander, there is no searchlight. It’s you and Sam: wild eyes, knotted hair and blood stains. 

A knife pushes you off of her, sinking itself into your abdomen with aim and anger. Lori had known you’d bite again.

Your breath escapes you, blood seeping from your sullen skin. You fall into the agony, screaming out to the sky. It’s not the single cut that would’ve killed you, it's the anger. Lori stands now, placing a foot against your throat. “A rabid dog bites three times before it’s greeted with death's hands, a rabid human? They get one chance.” She whispers, her words distant.

Behind the both of you, Sam slowly rises, hands clenched in fists, teeth baring. Her head hits the floor first, a horrible crack echoing in the basement. Screams had a way of sinking into you, biting at your heart, but these made you strong. You stand beside Sam as he hits her, ripping the fabric of your large jacket to tie around your wound.

You let him kill her.

Sam lifts you up the stairs and you help him walk through the cold, each taking turns to keep the other alive. You walk through the snow, damp and ripped clothes doing nothing to keep you warm. It feels as though it’s been hours and eventually, Sam collapses into you, the both of you falling to the soft snow. 

He kneels forward into you and you hold his face gently. The image was almost too familiar; Sam falling into the arms of someone he loves, face slick with tears and body weak. He had died too much already, you wouldn’t let it happen again.

You kiss his jawline so softly it might’ve been a snowflake landing on his bruised skin and he lifts his head. “Sorry.” he mutters repeatedly, a slurry of vowels and tears. You don’t dare to shush him, it wouldn’t help anything, it wouldn’t stop him. “I’m so sorry.”

You kiss him again. “None of this was ever your fault,” You whisper, voice tired and teeth stained. After a while, you try to move again, stumbling over only the iced floor. There’s a cough from Sam that pushes blood to his mouth, then he’s losing his footing again and falling into you, his hand pressing into the wound on your abdomen. You cry out, collapsing to the floor, spilling red on the pure white snow.

It’s his turn to hold you now, muttering endless apologies and ripping his own clothes to rebandage you; his skin is pale, a majority of his muscle eaten away by time and hunger. He looked like a corpse. You lie there, cold and silent as his hands shake, tying knots as though it’s routine. He pushes past his own pain, placing a blood stained hand on your cheek and whispering to you. You shiver under his touch and it shocks you how much you’ve missed being near him. You smile gently, and bury your head into his shoulder. The both of you sit there for a while, slowly freezing and holding each other with a softness you hadn’t felt in a while.

Eventually, you reach the road and lean against a barrier, slowly, softly. He kisses your collarbone as he leans into you and you both wait to die.

“I love you.” You whisper, ready to close your eyes and not open them again. He sighs almost contently, his lips finding your skin again. Your fingers were red and sore, blood picking at the frost.

“I love you,” he replies.

Just as the two of you close your eyes with a sad acceptance, there’s a roar of an engine you recognise. The wheels screech, a voice yells, but neither of you respond. Sam’s fallen asleep now and you don’t have the energy to speak. Hands grip your shoulders, press down to stop the flow of blood, scream your name. You can see him in a blur, but there’s not enough in you to react. Your eyes close and it’s something you’re ok with.

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖ng 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙

You wake up slowly, bleach biting at your nose. The room is stark white and clean - beeping rings in your ears. You’re alone. You climb out of the hospital bed and wince, the wound clean, but still painful. It didn’t take you long for you to find Dean, his voice loud against the hush of the ward. He turns, eyes locking onto you and grins, running over and leaving the doctor he was talking to behind. His arms wrap around you, soft and welcoming. “Thought the both of you had left me. Took me a month and a bit to find you.” He pulls away, smiling, “You’re both too strong, found your own way out.” He’s happy, Sam’s alive.

He sees the look in your eyes, he knows. “He’s inside, not awake yet.” He replies, voice softer now. You spare one more, thankful glance at your best friend and make your way to Sam’s room.

Sam lies there, still and peaceful. His cheeks are brighter and his bones hidden by strength once more. You sit by his side, eyes tired, and wait for him to wake up. He will, he has to. Eventually, sleep takes you and you lean against his bed, head resting on his chest to feel the gentle rise and fall. Your hand holds his, there’s not much else you can do.

“Aren’t you meant to be in your own bed?” A voice asks and your eyes open to see him smiling at you. His hair is brushed back and his skin is clean of dirt. He sounds okay.

You laugh slightly, smiling for the first time in a month and reply, “I had better things to do.” You lean forward, kissing his lips softly, careful not to hurt either of you. He returns the sentiment, hand tying itself into your hair. You hold his face, thumb tracing his jawline, and smile as you pull away.

He stays there, noses touching slightly. You’re centimetres apart. “You’re lucky I’m not infectious.” He whispers. You laugh again and move your hands to gently clasp the back of his neck.

“I wouldn’t care anyway.”

Sam kisses you again.

[musiclover61]

Little witch pt 2

Fandom: supernatural

Summary: You and your fiancée were about to have people over but you got a knock on your front door then attacked and kidnapped, but you got saved by these two guys. This is a part 2

Paring: Sam Winchester x witch!reader

Waring: Cussing, describing wounds (gashes, cuts and bruises), mentions of blood, yn is used, fem!reader, let me know if I missed something :)

A/N: there is a little more Sam Winchester x Reader in this one but it was more to the end. Again it's been a while since I've watch Supernatural.

I don't know how to link part 1 yet, I'm really sorry 🙏

Proofread!!

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

After a few more minutes of driving and me calming down and trying not to ask a bunch of questions I 'woke up' and looked around "where are we?" I asked rubbing my eyes

"We're almost there about 10 more minutes" Dean grumbled looking in the rear view mirror at me

I gave him a nod and looked out the window but I couldn't help but think about what the hell they were talking about.

After another 10 more minutes we had gotten to the motel Sam and Dean were staying at. Sam and Dean got out of the car and had hurried to help me get out of the car. Dean opened the door and Sam gently got me out, holding my arm. Once I was out of the car fully Dean grabbed my other arm, we walked with each one of them holding my arm as I limpped to their room.

When we got into the room, Sam and Dean laid me down on one of the beds, my back was against the headboard and my legs were laid out on the bed. I looked down at my legs to see the one big gash on the top of my thigh and some other little rips in my jeans that had cuts beneath them. I then looked at my arms cuts and bruises all over them, some little cuts and some big cuts, dirt was all over me. I felt dirty, sweaty and my arms and legs hurt from all the cuts, the gash was hurting like hell.

Sam and Dean were over at the foot of the other bed talking about something. They were huddled up, trying to decide something I'm guessing.

"So what are you guys going to do about my cuts and huge gash?" I asked looking at the brothers.

They snapped there heads to me "Yeah, hold on" Dean said then closed his eyes and leaned his head up "Hey Cas, we need help with uhhh.... Y/N" Dean said forgetting my name for a second "She's hurt and she needs help" Dean said

"What the fuck..." I mumbled "you good?" I asked trying to put the pice together on who Cas was and why Dean looked like he was praying

"He's an Angel" Sam said "his name is Castiel" Sam added

'WHAT THE HELL HE JUST SAY?!' I thought, and I guess my face changed because he looked at me and sighed

"We're not crazy" Sam said walking over to me, he sat on the other bed. "Listen you know the storys about Ghosts and Vampires and-"

I cut him off quickly. "Demons and Angels?" I asked "I heard you and Dean talking at the gas station" I told him

Dean looked at me "what did you hear?" Dean asked me crossing his arm

"The demons want me alive for something, your going to get me healed and then I'm going to be bait" I told them, looking between Dean and Sam "which I'm not found of" I added

"I'm not either" A man said that appeared next to Dean, I jumped and screamed covering my mouth

"Where the hell did you come from!" I yelled looking between the three boys "aren't you guys not scared?!" I asked concerned

"I'm Castiel, and if you use her as bait and the demon's actually get her then we could all be in danger" Castiel was a short man? women? thing? Short thing compared to Sam and Dean, he was wearing a trench coat and had a white shirt on, with a tie, he had on black pants. "she's a witch" Castiel told them "a powerful one too" Castiel added "she's not a normal one" Castiel said then looked at me "that's why Angels and Demons will fight for you" Castiel told me and began to walk over to me

He touched my shoulder, closed his eyes then opened them and gave me a nod "we need the Demon that hurt you" Castiel said

"Sorry but frankly I don't want to see the thing that killed my fiancée." I spat "And I don't know if you can't see, but my leg is cut open" I added, annoyed.

"No, I healed you" Castiel told me flatly. Looking at my thigh I had seen that my gash was... gone?

I gave him a confused look and looked down at my thigh again to make sure that the gash in my leg was gone, and it was... like completely gone, no scar or anything, just dirt. I looked at my arms to see that the only stuff on my arm was the dirt, no cuts, no scratches, or scraps "what..?" I questioned looking up at Castiel "how did you do that?" I asked him

"I'm an angel." Castiel said flatly. He looked away from me then to Sam and Dean "We can't use her as bait" Castiel said "if she gets captured, it could be dangerous" Castiel told them

"Okay so I have a question" I cut in getting off the bed making Castiel move out of the way "what am I and why do Demons want me?" I asked

Castiel looked at me. His face was blank and his eyes looked dead "your a witch, a powerful one, and to Lucifer your the key of... 'letting hell break loose'" Castiel looked confused when he said 'letting hell break loose'

"I'm sorry... what?" I asked looking between the three boys

"Lucifer is real, he's out of hell, and he's trying to take over the world and make the world a new hell" Dean said 'catching' me up

"W-What?" I said looking at them. They stared at me waiting for me to say something. After a few minutes of silence I spoke. "I need to go outside" I said pushing past them and walking outside the hotel room.

☆☆☆

I walked over to a bench that was near the room and sat down. 'What the hell did they just tell me' I thought as I put my elbows on my knees and put my head in my hands. My thoughts were just going and going and going, I didn't know what to think, I didn't know how to think.

I guess I didn't hear the door to the hotel room open, or the footsteps that were coming towards me but I did hear my name being called by the six foot tall brown haired guy that carried me to the car and took me inside the hotel.

"Y/N?" Sam asked "You good?" Sam added putting his hand on my back "Listen I know what Dean and Cas told you can be a lot to take in but uh... we really need you to be on board... the hell thing that Dean said is ture and if what Cas said is true then you can help us" Sam told me. For some reason his voice was... calming to me. It was like he knew how to not scare me. Something in my head was telling me to run the other way but there was a louder, bigger voice telling me to trust Mr moose, so I did.

"I'm on board" I nodded "but I want to know how to use my powers" I said looking up on him. His hand didn't leave my back and to be honest I didn't mind. "Castiel said that I'm a powerful witch so I want to use my powers to help you and Dean. I need to know how to use them" I told him

He gave me a nod and rubb his hand on my back then looked at me "I'll talk to Cas and see if he can help you" Sam gave me a little smile.

For a second we just sat there looking at eachother, his hand was on my back and his eyes were on mine. It felt... good. Now that I was looking at him up close he looked, handsome, stunning, as good looking as a man could get.

"Uh do- do you need a second out here?" Sam asked me moving his hand off my back then looked down at the ground

"Can you just sit here for a second... with me?" I asked him. I was looking at him kinda hoping he didn't laugh in my face

"Y-Yeah," He looked at me and smiled "I'll stay" he gave me a nod.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

A/N: I hope this part was good I'll come out with part 3 tomorrow probably. If not I'm sorry 😔. Also sorry it's kinda short

[thesilmarillionblog]

𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 ── mini series.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x F!Reader

Word Count: 7.216 / ?

Warnings: +18! (Minors DNI), smut, loss of virginity, unrequited love, heavy angst, hurt, drama, jealousy, sexual tension, suspense, friends to lovers

♱ Waste: Chapter: 1 ♱ Waste: Chapter: 2

♱ Waste: Chapter: 3 ♱ Waste: Chapter: 4

♱ Waste: Chapter: 5 ♱ Waste: Chapter: 6

[uzubebe]

purgatory

type: one shot

pairings: dean winchester x fem!reader (mutual pining, friends to lovers?), sam winchester x fem!reader (estranged besties)

disclaimer: i don’t write often, but i’ve been rewatching supernatural and i have so many idea. this may not be the best, but just some self indulgence. i love sammy with my whole heart but he needed to be told off ok.

summary: the dick was dead. dean and cas were gone. and you didn’t rest a wink while searching for them. unfortunately it turns out dean wasn’t the only one sam abandoned that year.

“cmon there has the be something” you sighed, aimlessly scrolling through 14 open tabs on your laptop and a pile of messy papers scattered across the motel table. you slammed your hands on the table in frustration, letting out a shaky breath and gripping your fists tight.

it had been a year. an entire year without dean winchester. the second he vanished you had delved into aimless research in a desperate attempt to find him. you had to busy yourself, because thinking about his absence for too long caused an indescribable pain to open up in your chest.

you had only broken down three times in your year long search, which you figured was a record for someone going through what you were. you’d spent countless nights crying yourself into restless sleep, sleep filled with dreams and nightmares about the eldest winchester.

you crammed your hands to your tired eyes in a hurry, shaking your head vigorously in an attempt to wake yourself. you had to focus because you sure as hell knew sam wasn’t doing anything about it.

after deans disappearance sam explained that he needed time and space, which you understood. you cared for him just as much as you cared for his eldest brother. he had been your best friend for as long as you could remeber. and this was his brother, someone he didn’t want to learn how to live without.

you didn’t realize that time and space meant him also disappearing for an entire year with zero contact. you tried to understand him in the beginning, tried to rationalize why he would leave with no warning or explanation, because there had to be one right ? after four months you decided he wasn’t coming back and it was your job to find his brother.

you felt tears well in the corners on your eyes, inhaling a sharp breath and stretching your arms to regain your composure, gearing up for more research instead of dwelling on the loneliness.

you were pulled from your thoughts as your phone began vibrating vigorously from your bag. you quickly pulled yourself from the chair, feeling your body creak, this year had aged you in more ways than one.

you pulled your phone from the bag and froze. you narrowed your eyes, studying the caller id in absolute astonishment.

dean winchester.

you scoffed in disbelief, settling on the first emotion that bumbled up your throat, anger. you quickly hit the answer button.

“listen, i don’t know who the fuck this is. but lose this fucking number, i don’t have time for prank-“ you started spitting vigorously into the phone, being cut off at the gruff laugh that echoed through the speaker.

“…dean?” you whispered. it couldn’t be. how was he calling you?

“yeah, y/n. it’s me” he said softly, this time the tears came pouring out without warning, you let out a sad sob mixed with some kind of laugh.

“where are you? please tell me where you are.” you begged, he quickly gave you his address and within second you were tumbling into your car and speeding to him.

-

once arriving you let out a sigh, mentally preparing yourself for something you had been longing for for the last year. after 2-3 seconds of this you decided you couldn’t wait a second longer. you barreled out of the car and began your search for their motel room, suddenly turning into an olympic runner as you looked at each room number. you breath hitched in your chest as you finally arrived in front of the door. you knocked briefly before swiftly barreling into the room. nothing could’ve stopped you from getting inside that room, and there was no time for pleasantries and manners.

“dean!?” you screeched, scanning the room. your eyes landed on him as he stood from the motel bed to greet you, a sense of overwhelming relief washed over you as you ran to him.

within second you were in his arm, tears flooding your eyes as you buried your head into his chest. you felt an arm tighten around you waist, as he cradled the back of your head with his free hand.

“shh, it’s okay y/n. i’m here. i’ve got you.” he whispered, trying to calm you from the heartbreaking sobs escaping your chest. you gripped the back of his shirt, pulling him as close as you could, fearing that if you let go he may disappear once again. after what felt like hours and finally realizing that this was real, you slowly pulled for him allowing him a minute to truly study your appearance.

you looked exhausted. your hair that had been previously above your shoulders now hanging loosely below your shoulder blades, tangled and messy. the bags under your eyes had grown, and you looked like you hadn’t eaten a proper meal in ages.

“y/n…what happened? are you okay?” he asked, concern flooding into his pretty green eyes. you let out a laugh and wiped your nose. you moved from him slightly, opting to grip one of his hands to keep yourself grounded.

“uh..you happened. i’ve been looking in every nook and cranny in this god forsaken country trying to find you.” you explained, sending him a melancholy smile. he studied you, pulling you to him and setting a soft kiss to your forehead.

“thank you. i’m sorry. i wish i could’ve been here.” he whispered, setting his forehead to yours. you closed your eyes, smiling softly.

“you’re here now.” you realized, letting out a breath that it felt like you had been holding for the past year. it felt like you had been suffocating all this time, and seeing him finally allowed you to breath properly again. you were basking in this feeling, inhaling the fresh oxygen that would only be provided by the presence of dean winchester.

you were trapped in your thoughts, that was until you heard a slight cough from behind dean, interrupting your moment.

“if you’re going to say something. don’t.” you demanded moving from dean, and seeing his younger brother sitting awkwardly on the bed behind him.

“listen-“ sam began, but you quickly cut him on, shaking your head as you moved further into his view.

“no sam. i don’t have to listen. you left. crowley told you that you were on your own and you just took his fucking word and ran with it. i was here. i was here the entire time and you just left ! so you don’t get to tell me to “listen.” not when i spent the last year destroying myself to find your brother, while you went off and got a fucking dog.” you spat, sam straightened up slightly, fidgeting with his hands. you were shaking uncontrollably, the prior moment of bliss was being overpowered by the rage and loneliness you had kept locked up throughout the last year.

“how do you…?” he asked, trailing off as he tried to gain the courage to meet your eyes again. you let out a cynical laugh, balling your hands into a tight fist.

“yeah. i looked for you. i was concerned. i needed to make sure you were okay. but you’ll never guess what i found. to my pleasant surprise i saw you playing house with a pretty brunette and friendly little dog. so you’ll have to give me a lot more than a sob story about how you couldn’t handle dean being gone for me to ever forgive you.” you said, moving closer to sam. he hadn’t ever seen you this way, so angry. he had to admit he was slightly unnerved and almost scared.

“because you know who else couldn’t handle it ? me. but i didn’t just lose dean, i lost you too. i called you daily for weeks, desperate for some kind of explanation. i was going out of my mind, alone in dingy motel rooms without the two people i needed most. and then, after a few months, i couldn’t even get your voicemail, just an automated voice telling me i was desperately trying to reach a disconnected number.” you were seething. you felt like every vessel pumping your blood was boiling, your raging heartbeat pounding in your ears, you thought you might pass out.

“so i don’t want to hear about how there was “a girl.” because there was a girl here the whole goddamn time. a girl who had been by your side for years. and you. still. left.” you continued, sam found himself staring at the floor, studying its pattern, because he couldn’t take the look of absolute betrayal that consumed your eyes.

“and guess what ? i didn’t get the fairytale year you had. because my person, the one i wanted to be with. the one i wanted to settle down and get a fucking dog with, was gone!” sam flinched at your tone. by the end of it, you found yourself screaming, throat feeling hoarse as you finally took a breath.

you calmed instantly as you felt deans hand reach for yours. you inhaled a deep breath and turned to him. not even realizing you had practically confessed to the years of pent of feelings you had for the man.

“y/n. i understand. really, i’m upset too. angry even. but let’s take a breather, yeah? you need a good meal, and an even better nap. why don’t we get out of here, give each other some space, regroup later?” dean suggested. you hadn’t noticed his watery eyes and unsteady voice. he was brought almost to tears at the state you were in, at what his absence had caused. you nodded slowly moving closer to him. sam slowly stood up.

“just call me when you guys are ready. y/n…i’m sorry. i really am.” he whispered, you didn’t turn around to look at him. you knew yourself well enough to know that those puppy dog eyes would make you feel insurmountable guilt, they always had. but you didn’t regret what you had said, it was the truth. and right now, you weren’t sure what could help you forgive your former best friend.

dean gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. he looked back to sam and sent him a sad smile as he led you out of the motel room.

he stopped and turned to you once the door clicked shut. he studied you, narrowing his eyes as you suddenly became incredibly fascinated with the small rock next to your left foot. you forgot what it felt like to have him watching you so intensely.

“where were you?” you whispered, finally meeting his gaze, relief washing over you instantly, he was here. he was real.

“uh…purgatory. guess standing to close to dick when he died gave me a one way ticket to his afterlife.” dean explained, you scoffed slightly, mentally punching yourself at the realization.

“fucking purgatory. of course. i should’ve figured that out. god.” you cursed yourself, how could you have been so stupid ? of course he was in fucking purgatory. dean picked up on the fact that you were internally blaming yourself for his disappearance and immediately took action.

“hey. hey.” he whispered, settings his hands on either side of your face, forcing you to look at him. he bent down to your level, a stern look on his face.

“do not, for one second, blame yourself. none of this was your fault, and you’ve done more than i could’ve ever anticipated. i know it was a hard, even excruciating year, but i’m here now. and i’m not going anywhere.” dean insisted, you studied the look in his eyes. it was one you hadn’t seen from him before, or maybe it had been so long that you just needed to re-educate yourself on his mannerisms.

“okay. thank you.” you whispered, setting one of your hands atop his. he scoffed slightly at you thanking him, when they should’ve all been thanking you.

“cmon, let’s get you something to eat sweetheart.” dean smiled, moving to your side, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and walking you towards the car. you nuzzled into his side, wrapping your arms instinctively around his waist.

“think i made sam cry.” you scoffed slightly, replaying the intense speech you shoved down sam’s throat.

“yeah well i’m thinking maybe he needed to hear it.” dean stated, you let out a sigh and nodded.

“and for the record, i would’ve really liked it. settling down and getting a dog with you. i wouldn’t have wanted to do it with anyone else.” dean declared, setting his lips to the top of your head, feeling him slightly smile into your hair. you’re smile grew, it felt like your heart was finally beating normally again. you dug your head further into his side in embarrassment.

“well i guess we’ll just have to make up for lost time.” you whispered, giving deans waist a reassuring squeeze.

“great plan, so we thinking doberman? golden retriever? maybe something small like a chihuahua or something?” dean joked, pulled you tighter into his chest with a laugh.

“shut up” you giggled, punching his chest playfully, sending him a big grin as he continued to chuckle. and since being back, dean felt okay again, at least for that moment. cause the two of you were together once again, and he had the ability to make you smile like that. he wanted to do it for the rest of his life.

[prentissluvr]

HI MARI !!

IM HERE WITH MY DEAN THOUGHTS!! (mostly platonic)

when you become friends/best friends, he’s ride or die for you

not on the same level of sammy but it’s a close second

the playful banter between the two of you is just great

although he knows that he can be annoying and uses it to his advantage

flirting with you to annoy his brother (he knows that sammy is in love with you and does it to get on his nerves)

PET NAMES!

has a reserved nickname for you but does pull out the pet names if you’re having a bad day

speaking of bad days/sick days

he will go out of his way to take care of you

pulls out all of the stops for his bestie

this is when you realize this man is a secret softy at heart (refuses to admit it, because he’s a “big bad hunter”)

platonic cuddles/casual physical affection

dean is reserved with physical affection (im thinking post hell! dean) (earlier szns dean wouldn’t hold back tbh)

but once he’s comfortable with you (and is sure that you won’t leave him or sammy)

then it’s a free for all

swinging his arm over your shoulder, sharing a bed if there’s only two beds (sam seethes sometimes but this is way before you guys get together lol), resting his head in your lap during movie nights (starts off as a joke wanting to annoy you but then does it almost everytime you guys have one, loves when his hair is getting played with)

there’s def more but ill cut it off here (i love bestie dean but im also in love with him LOL) (the winchester brothers have a GRIP on me)

HELLO DAISYYYY HEHEHEHE this is amazing i'm so obsessed <33

cw : mentions of injuries, pet names obviously , dean is annoying ofc <3, sammy and reader like each other, swearing probably, alcohol mention, unedited! wc : 1.5K

⟢ ride or die : i mean yeah, this is pretty much undeniable. sure, sam will always be his first priority, but the moment he knows that you're a part of the team, no doubts, he's prepared to do just about anything for you. both fortunately and unfortunately, this does mean he gets really protective of you similarly to how he is with sam, especially if you're younger than him. and even if you're not, the fact that you're his best friend makes you family, and we know how dean feels about family <3

⟢ playful banter : this is basically just your whole friendship with him HAHA. not truly, of course, but mostly heh. like idk what else to say, he'll take any opportunity to tease you or make you fake angry because he just thinks it's too funny. and he'll love whatever way you respond to that. he definitely enjoys if you return his fire with your own teasing and retorts and i personally think you are so allowed to be mean to him because he's an idiot!! obviously don't be actually mean, but he enjoys having a teasing relationship where you can call each other stupid and know that the other means it with love lol.

when the two of you get into it, sam gets so annoyed. like you'll be arguing about the value of mustard on sandwiches and both of you are so invested in winning the argument and sam is like oh my god, dean please focus on the road and shut up, both of you😭😭 the boy is trying to sleep, he doesn't need this right now. so you either keep arguing in hushed tones (which doesn't last for long) or you pick it back up at another time (that's also probably inconvenient and annoying to sam still HA).

and yeah, dean can be very annoying and he loves to rile you up LOL. it's great when you reciprocate his banter, but sometimes he's just so ridiculous that it has you rolling your eyes and groaning in frustration. and unfortunately for you, that, or any other dramatic response, is exactly what dean is trying to get out of you. "dean, will you shut up?" is one of his favorites. he just laughs at you, he thinks the way you say it is so funny and cute.

he does other annoying things too, like rest his elbow on your head or shoulder if it reaches, he doesn't care if you're his same height, barely shorter, or significantly shorter, he's gonna make fun of your height. and if you're taller, yeah he's still gonna make fun of that, too. he'll playfully put his hand on the top of your head, just for the pure intention of annoying you. idk basically anything that annoys you, he does it (usually without going overboard, he knows where to draw the line).

and yeah, the flirting is more about annoying sam, but it's a total plus when you give him that look saying, "really, are you kidding me?" he'll love a good banter on that end of the spectrum too, if you're down for flirting back. unfortunately, this sends sam the wrong message for the longest time, but it's not your fault that you don't know that he likes you back! you're just playing around with dean heh.

⟢ pet names/nicknames : yes yes yes!! he absolutely has a nickname that is specific to you!! basically your version of "sammy." it might be a nickname based off of your given name, but it totally could be an inside joke, something silly and cute. it might even be a pet name that he uses for you exclusively. i can see him calling a younger best friend "pumpkin," mostly as another method of annoying you. that one is used pretty sparingly though because it's a little over the top for the both of you. he definitely uses it a lot less than whatever his main nickname for you is, which he uses just about all the time lol. if you have a nickname based off you name, sam probably uses that, too. so, dean likes having a separate nickname that he came up with which only he uses.

and yes! he does use pet names casually and occasionally, but he's far more likely to use them if you're having a bad day, if you were injured on a hunt, or something like that! i think maybe this is just because i'm obsessed with the time that dean called lisa honey once, but i think the idea of dean calling his best friend honey is really adorable. that one is used for maximum comfort, especially if you're injured <3 "c'mon, honey. keep your eyes open, you're okay." i can also see dean using baby platonically sometimes!

he does occasionally use over the top names like sugar plum or honey bunches to annoy you lol. he will "sweetheart" you in a teasing way because he loves the way it makes you fume LOL. but in special circumstances, he'll call you sweetheart sincerely (also more likely when you're injured—"you're alright, sweetheart, we're almost to the motel"). idk if this counts as a pet name, but he'll definitely call you kid and kiddo if you're younger than him like how he does with charlie <3 i see him using darlin' very casually! "alright, c'mon darlin', let's see what sammy found." casual pet names means he's in a good mood though. he also will use insults like pet names because you're his idiot best friend <33

he won't tell you this but he likes if you've got a nickname for him, too! but he will tease you if you try to use the same pet names for him, even if you're casual about it in the same way he is.

⟢ taking care of you on bad/sick days : uhm yeah, he tries not to be obvious about it, but when he goes the the store just to pick up your favorite treat or kisses your forehead like fifty billion times when he thinks you're asleep, there's no way you can miss what a big softie he is. if the way you wear your hair allows, he'll brush any stray strands out of your face, especially if you're sick and it's stuck to your face with with sweat. checks your temperature on your forehead with his hand <3 then if he thinks you have a fever, he busts out the thermometer and takes your temp that way just to make sure you don't have to go to the hospital. he brings you your meds and lovingly bothers you about eating enough food. makes you watch movies with him lol

on days that are simply just bad, well, he's horrible with emotions, but he knows that pie and alcohol can fix almost anything (this is not true, but it still helps you to have a treat and a drinking buddy). while he's bad with emotions, he is absolutely more than willing to listen to anything you need to talk about. he's not sure how to tell you that he's there for you out loud, so he'll pour you another drink if you're not too drunk and rub your back with a soft, but firm hand. his go to phrase to comfort you is, "we'll figure it out," and it works because you know he really means it, and he says it in a soft and sweet tone that's quite rare for him.

⟢ physical affection : he can definitely be more reserved sometimes with touch, but he welcomes any physical affection that you initiate. if you purposefully stand shoulder to shoulder, he'll put his arm around you, and he'll certainly accept any hugs you have to offer. like you said, once he's even more comfortable and confident in your being around, he's much more open about swinging an arm around your shoulder and any given moment (especially because he can shove you around a little that way lmao).

he's definitely okay with the bed sharing, mostly because it's a necessity, though he tries to get you to share with sam much more once he realizes that you like each other because he can see sam physically become upset when you share with dean lmao.

movie nights are prime time for physical affection with dean!! i definitely agree that he puts his head in your lap first to annoy you, but when you don't bat an eye and start running your fingers through his hair, he's done for. he always is trying to get you to do it again, every time you watch something together, and that's when it gets annoying lmao, because he won't let you rest your head on his shoulder anymore or let you be the one to put you head in his lap. he'll make an exception if you're having a bad though hah. once again, he will dial down the cuddles if he can tell that it's bothering sam, but will absolutely not give up the physical affection with you because he thinks sam needs to get over it LOL. because, at the end of the day!! you'll always be his best friend, and he will always respect you and your relationship with sammy.

[uhohnotthisagain]

What they didn’t see

Summary: Just your classic friends to lovers with some good old fashioned angst.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Characters: Dean, Sam, Vampire

Warnings: mention of injury, angst, pining, fighting, weapons, swearing.

Word count: 2.0k

a/n: Enjoy, I hope it’s ok x

My masterlist

“Hey.” You walk into the motel room with two bags full of food. “I’ve got dinner.”

“Oh my god, you’re amazing.” Dean rushes towards you to grab the bags. “Did you get any -” “Yea, it's in this bag.” You point to the bag with the pie in it, sitting down on the couch next to Sam as Dean grabs a chair to sit opposite the two of you. Sam smirked at the pink tint that had appeared on your face.

As the three of you dig in, you can’t help but admire Dean as he devours his burger before moving on to the pie. What most people would find disgusting, watching his messily eat his food, you found it oddly pleasing. Sam nudges you, and when you turn to look at him, all he does is smirk, prompting you to roll your eyes at him before focusing on your own burger.

You had known the Winchester’s for years. Your father and John used to hunt together, leaving the three of you at the motel. When your father was killed by a vampire, it made sense for you to stay with them, seeing as you had no where else to go. As you grew up, feelings towards Dean began to grow, but you pushed them away. He only ever saw you as a little sister anyway. Nothing was ever going to happen.

“I think we should head out early tomorrow, I think there’s a potential case a few states over. It’ll be a days drive so lets turn in early.” Dean says as he finishes up. “I call first shower.”

As the bathroom door shuts, Sam starts chucklying. “Shut up!” You whisper to him, shoving him nonchalantly. “Oh come on. I’m shocked he still hasn’t noticed. You’re so obvious.”

You roll your eyes. “No I’m not. But even if I am, he doesn’t care about me like that. Nothing is ever going to happen.”

“Sure.” It’s Sam’s turn to roll his eyes.

–

“Dean, please can you just shut the music off for 5 minutes? I’m trying to concentrate.” Sam practically yells over the music that Dean is blasting. “What? I can’t hear you over the music.” You roll your eyes and shake your head at the two of them, going back to your own research on the case.

Sam reaches forward to turn the music down enough so he can be heard, Dean slapping his hand in the process. “By the looks of it, I think its a vampire nest. Not two many killings at once so shouldn’t be a huge nest, no more than 5 or 6.” You nodded, finalising the readings you had occupied yourself with before closing the lore book. You stared out the window, nodding along to the music that filled the otherwise silent Impala.

While you were watching the trees run past, Dean glanced at you in the rearview mirror. He tried to avoid lingering, quickly turning his gaze back to the road in front.

-

In a few short hours, you had arrived to a motel. Dean handed you your bag, whispering a soft “Thank you.” at the gesture, which Dean responded with a small smile.

As you walked in, you noticed that there were only two beds, no pull out couch which was often where you slept. “I am not dealing with your flailing about tonight, Y/N.” Sam says, looking at you with his arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

“It’s alright, I don’t mind the occasional kicking. Sleep next to me.” Dean calls from behind you. Your eyes widen at the realization that you’re going to have to sleep next to Dean. You hadn’t slept in the same bed as him in years, often opting for the sofa or next to Sam.

As you got ready in the bathroom, you took a deep breath as you prepared yourself. “You can do this, it’s one night.” You whispered to yourself, turning to open the door and head to bed. Dean was already in bed, sat up with headphones on, eyes closed and nodding to the beat of whatever music he was listening. You crawled into the other side of the bed, facing away from Dean, closest to the edge. You quickly drifted off to sleep, hoping you didn’t end up kicking or bothering Dean in anyway.

-

You woke up in the same position, however seemingly closer to the middle of the bed. An arm was draped across your waist. Dean.

It suddenly dawned on you that it was his arm around you, holding you in place. You gently picked up his arm, climbed out of bed and placed in onto a pillow, hoping it wouldn’t disturb his sleep.

The door opened and Sam walked through, having just come back from his run.

“Hey.” You smiled in return, collecting your things to get ready for the day. “I figured we can scope out where the nest is this morning, and get ready to attack just after dark.” Sam suggests. “Sounds good.”

Dean starts stirring, rolling over in bed. You rush to the bathroom, hoping to avoid an interaction just yet. You hear them talking as you have your shower, but you ignore them, focusing on the water falling down your body.

-

“So how was last night?” Sam smirked at me. “Shut up.” Dean responds, rubbing his face as he sits up in bed. “I did that for you, you know.”

“What? Have her sleep next to me? She’s not even interested. I don’t see why I have to be tortured with it.” Dean grumbles.

“Bullshit, she’s in love with you.” Dean rolls his eyes, “She snuck out of bed. She couldn’t even stand to talk to me this morning. There is no way on earth she likes me as anything more than a friend. Barely that even.”

“Dean, you do not see what I do.” Sam scoffs. “It’s obvious that you both love each other, why neither of you have made a move? I have no idea.”

Dean just brushes him off, getting up and stretching.

-

After you're dressed, you walk out of the bathroom, which Sam quickly takes custody of as soon as he sees you. “Gonna have a shower now.”

“Morning.” You say softly to Dean, who responds only with a grunt, still waking up. “I’m going to go grab breakfast and coffee, any requests?” You offer.

“Just the usual.” Dean responds. You nod, grabbing a key a walking out the door.

-

Later, after you’ve scoped out the nest and feel ready to attack, the three of you are parked outside the warehouse where they’re located.

“Right, let’s go in and split up, we’ll get them quicker that way. Be safe everyone.” Dean says before heading towards the entrance, you and Sam quickly in tow.

The fight began almost immediately. There were more vampires than you thought, at every turn, a vampire was charging towards you.

You swung the knife every which way you could with all your strength. You could hear Sam and Dean fighting more in other areas of the building.

Finally, it seemed that you had gotten them all. You went to check on Sam and Dean. As you turned a corner, before you could even react properly, another vampire charged at you. He lunged at you, causing you to drop your knife.

You screamed as he threw you against the wall, walking towards you as you lay on the ground.

“I will kill you for what you and your little friends did.” He picked you up and threw you against the wall behind him, hitting your head hard against the concrete floor as you landed. You groaned in pain, unable to fight any more.

“Y/N!” You heard someone yell. The room was spinning and you couldn’t find the strength to stand up. Suddenly, you couldn’t breathe. The vampire had its hand around your throat, fangs out ready to unleash his final attack.

The weight on your body was pulled off, and you could finally breathe, but you couldn’t move. You heard one final scream before silence, and then footsteps hurriedly running towards you.

“Y/N? Shit Y/N can you hear me? It’s ok baby we’re here, we’ve got you.” You groaned in response, before everything went black.

-

“Fuck, she passed out. Sammy, go start the car, quick.” Sam runs out to the car as Dean picks you up and carries you out.

Once in the car, he’s looking all over, trying to find all of your injuries to see if he could fix anything.

At the motel, he lays you down on the bed whilst Sam grabs the first aid kit, cleaning up any wounds that can be fixed.

“Sammy what do we do. She’s not waking up.” Dean has tears in his eyes. Sam puts two fingers on the side of your neck.

“She still has a strong pulse, she’s going to be ok. She’s breathing, just knocked out hard.” Dean’s holding your hand the entire time, refusing to look away from your battered and bruised, yet still unbelievably beautiful face.

“I haven’t told her. I didn’t tell her how I feel. What happens if she doesn’t wake up?”

Sam pats his brothers shoulder, “She’s going to wake up. She will be ok. Both of you will be.”

-

What seemed like days, was really only a few hours later, you started to wake up. You opened your eyes and looked around at your surroundings. You spot Sam laying in his bed, asleep. You look down at your hand, in a tight grip in Dean’s hand. He was asleep too, next to you. He was on top of the covers, still in his blood-soaked clothes and shoes.

As you moved, you groaned, feel sharp pain in your head. “Fuck that kills.”

Dean wakes up startled, feeling movement coming from you. “Hey, how are you feeling?” He whispers. “Like I got hit by a truck, train and car simultaneously.” You respond.

He lets out a small chuckle, thumb running over the back of your hand.

“I know it’s really bad timing but can I talk to you?” He asks. You nod, smiling as encouragement to keep going.

“Um, so the thing is, I, um.” He lets out a breath, now sitting up to look down at you. “I like you, a lot. And it’s ok if you don’t like me back. I thought I could keep it to myself, I thought it was just a stupid thing that would go away. But it hasn’t. And seeing you tonight, all beat up and unconscious. It scared me. I thought I might’ve lost you. And I just needed you to know. You don’t have to do anything. This doesn’t have to change anything, we can stay friends. Or you can leave, it’s up to-“

You place a hand on his cheek, leaning up to press a small peck on his lips. Testing the waters. As you pull away, he follows you, reconnecting your lips. This time, in a much deeper, more passionate kiss. One full of longing, and desperation. You could feel your lungs burn, but couldn’t seem to care, kneading your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. The one hand not holding his up is resting on your hip.

When you finally pull away for a breath, you stare into his eyes. “I like you too, like a lot.” He sighs. “Really? Are you sure.”

You giggle, “Beyond sure.” You press one final kiss to his lips before settling down, resting your head on his shoulder, arm around his waist while his is wrapped around you, hand on your waist while the other one is playing with the ends of you hair.

-

When you wake up the next morning, you feel warm, content. Taking a deep breath in, you see that you and Dean are in the same position you fell asleep in.

“Thank fuck!” You look to see Sam smiling at the two of you.”It’s about fucking time.” You flip him off, settling back down to lay with Dean some more before you had to get up.

“How are you feeling?” You hear Dean whisper. You look up at him. “I’m ok. Still in pain but it’s better.”

“Good. We’ll let you rest up a bit before getting back out there. I’m glad you’re ok.” He kisses your forehead. “Yeah me too.” You smile up at him.

[samwinchesterswifu]

Two Out of Three Aint Bad ( Sam Winchester x Reader Angst)

Before Season 5

Song Inspo: "Two Out of Three Aint Bad" by Meat Loaf

Warnings: Just your a-typical sammy sulking and angst.

MINORS DNI

A/N: Just a sad lil one for the time being <3

Word Count: 1.2k

Summary: Sam's trying to move on after jess, but what if he isnt 100% sure?

She climbs out the Impala and slams the door the behind her. Earning a yelp from Dean in protest, but she doesn’t listen to the man. Begrudgingly ignoring the amount of pain she was in she storms into the motels rental office. She slams down her credit card on the counter of the rental office and the clerk sends her an annoyed glare. Shaking her head she asks for a basic room. The clerk nods at her request, swipes the credit card, and hands her the key.

“Room 42,” the clerk spats out.

She thanks the clerk under her breath and begins to make her way to the door of the office as the boys enter.

“Did you get a room for us?” Dean asks.

She shakes her head no at his question and pushes past them. As she’s exiting the door, she could hear a distinct scoff leave Sam which fuels the angry lit fire of her stomach higher. This man had some damn nerve.

She makes her way to her single bed room. Slamming the door behind her and throws her duffle bag on to the bed. She stops for a second and takes a deep breath. The adrenaline was starting to wear off and her pain was starting to overcome every sensation. Unzipping the bag, she grabs the bottle of ibuprofen that sat on top. Opening the cap, she takes 3 out and heads towards the small kitchenette. Grabbing a glass from the cabinet, she fills it up with water from the sink and proceeds to take the pain pills.

Putting down the glass in the sink she moves to stretch her shoulders. Hissing at the sharp sensation of pain on her right shoulder. She groans at the thought of having to fix herself up, but a knock on the door pulls her out her thoughts. Hesitant at first, another knock sounds and Sam makes his presence known.

She gulps in frustration and walks to the door. She opens it for Sam, and ignores his greeting as she sits down on the bed facing the bathroom. She pulls her right arm out the sleeve of her shirt exposing the gash on her shoulder for Sam to stitch. Sam sighs behind her. She watches him from the corner of her eye sit down the medical kit beside her and he takes out the necessary tools.

“This is gunna sting,” he whispers. She nods in acknowledgement.

Sam begins to clean the gash with a few alcohol pads. The occasional swipe makes her hiss but it was manageable. Shortly after, Sam starts to stitch the gash close. The two of them sat in silence the entire process, and all she wanted to do was turn around, and punch the man in the face. She was so angry with him for the earlier hunt, and he seemed completely oblivious by his actions as he always does.

Sam finishes up then goes to wash his hands in her bathroom. She slips her arm back into her shirt carefully, then proceeds to packs up Sam’s kit for him as he makes his way back to the main room.

The two of them stand in front of each other not saying anything. She didn’t really know what to say to him. She knew why he did what he did, but it was still frustrating every time he did it.

It was supposed to be a simple Vamp hunt in Ohio. They had tracked a rogue that had a falling out from his pack and was angry killing at his circumstances. They had tracked him down to the abandoned barn he was staying in. She had made herself known to the Vamp as a way to lure him from his hiding spot. She was ready to go in for the kill, when he lunged at her and Sam pushed her to the side. Killing the Vamp himself instead.

Sam sighs, and shakes his head at her. He walks past her and gets ready to leave her room when she speaks up.

“I was ready you know?” She whispers behind him. Earning another sigh from the tall man.

She turns around to face him as he does the same.

“I know, I know you are but I cant stand the thought of loosing you. He could’ve seriously hurt you!” By the end of Sams response, his voice was raised and she never appreciated raised voices during an argument.

“Damn it Sam! You gotta trust me at some point. I’ma fucking seasoned hunter for crying out loud!” She yells, matching his energy.

“I just cant-“ Sam starts to respond before stopping. She groans in annoyance as that was a typical deflecting thing he did.

“You cant what huh?” She spats, crossing her arms over her chest and challenges him.

“I cant loose you like Jess okay!” Sam spats out. Completely taken aback by his response.

“Sam-“ She calls out to him as her arms fall loosely from her chest.

“I cant. I just cant. I already lost one girl I was in love with and I’m trying to love you too but every time we do something stupid all I can think of is the night of the fire and-“

“Trying to love?” She questions him and Sam looks to her panickily.

“Yes. Trying to love.” Sam says and he shoves his hands deep into his pockets in embarrassment by his words.  

“What does that even mean?” She asks still trying to connect the dots in her own head.

“I love you. I’ve been in love with you for quite a while now I think and I don’t think I’ve allowed myself to because Jess still sits so deep in me.” Sam whispers. He takes a peak up at her as his gaze was previously on the floor and she could see the tears welling on his lash line.

“Sammy,” she says quietly. She takes a few strides towards him. Keeping a few inches between them to allow him a chance to step back if he wanted to.

His gaze fixates back towards the floor. To counter him, she cuffs his cheek and raises his head to look at her. But he does take that step back.

“I need time-“ Sam starts before taking a deep breath.

“I need time to really figure out if this is love that I’m feeling or just protecting. I don’t want to screw this up again.” Sam finishes.

She nods at his response.

“I understand, but I’ll be here when youre ready. But please, next time we hunt, let me kill the damn thing.” She asks.

Sam lets a low chuckle escape his lips.

“Okay,” he whispers. Sam takes a step towards and places a tight kiss on her forehead. She smiles at the sensation.

“Goodnight.” Sam says looking into her eyes.

She smiles up and whispers goodnight in return. Sam turns to leave her room and she continues to stand by the door, completely baffled by the way things unfolded. It was clear that Sam wanted, or needed her. But she was unsure he if truly loved her. But hey, two out three aint bad.  

[stusbunker]

Spotless: Animato

Chapter Thirty Four

Featuring: Dean Winchester/Reader

Other characters: Gibson Child OMC, Bobby, Annie, Victor, Charlie, both bands and roadies, nameless DJs

Word Count: 3160

Warnings, etc: Mutual pining, still unbeta'd, the last of Uncle Dean for a while, drinking and mild drug use, smoking cigarettes (do not come at me for this), Kevin calling Dean out publicly but subtly.

Series Masterlist

The rapid beat of a double-stroke roll woke Dean from the haze of sleep. He cracked one eye open and found the source of the wake up call. Gibson, sitting on the floor in Dean’s suite, was wailing on the coffee table while watching a random infomercial on the hotel’s tv’s world class Sunday morning programming. At least the little dude hadn’t gotten into Dean’s guitars without asking. 

“Gibby! What gives, man?”

“Oh, sorry,” the little boy didn’t even look back, instead he lightened his efforts into a tapping from the original knocking.

Dean huffed and fell back onto his pillow, muttering to himself and the ceiling, “I guess we’re up for the day.”

They had spent the night watching old monster movies and eating pizza. Dean had even taken Gibson to the hotel’s pool for a dip before the adult only hours kicked in. He had no idea how Pam and Lee kept up with the kid on a normal day, Dean was fucking beat. And that was after he slept more than double his usual night’s rest. 

How was it after nine already?! No wonder the kid was bored.

“You hungry? Probably should see if the buffet’s still going,” Dean asked suddenly.

“Okay!” Gibson dropped his sticks on the coffee table and hopped up with the unbridled energy of youth.

“Yeah, uh, I gotta throw some real pants on, dude.” Dean dragged himself to the edge of the bed and rolled his back. “Give Uncle Dean a minute and we can head down.”

Gibson nodded, but then ran to the counter in the kitchenette. “I made you coffee! They’ve got the little cups. But that was a while ago.”

Dean raised his eyebrow and surveyed the damage from his perch on the bed. “You make one for yourself?”

“Yep! It was gross. And the pink sugar didn’t help.”

“Yeah, well, that’s because it is gross. White or brown are best— no matter what Uncle Sam says.”

Gibson giggled, walking carefully over to Dean with the paper cup sloshing slightly. Dean wanted to help him, but he looked so proud of himself that Dean just sat back and clenched his hands as he awaited the delivery.

“Thanks, buddy,” Dean diligently took a sip. It was god awful. Cold, sure, but also really bitter and thin. Thankfully the kid didn’t think to add anything for him. He sighed and took another gulp while trying not to breathe and taste it more. “Uh—-yeah. Can’t start the day without some fuel.”

“You like it?”

“Yeah, man, of course. Now, I am gonna get dressed, find your shoes so we can get some grub.”

Turned out, the continental breakfast was already being cleaned up when they got back downstairs. Gibson’s spirits dropped instantly, but Dean assured him it was alright, and took the little man over to the attached restaurant that was hopping with the brunch crowd. 

“Look who the cat dragged in!” Bobby’s voice caught Dean’s attention as they rounded the corner with the hostess. “Make room. Miss— these idjits are with us, sorry they don’t have any manners about showing up on time.”

“Alright, I’ll— uh, I’ll let your server know.”

Dean had the wherewithal to murmur and hand over his thanks and apologies right in time to get a surprised smile. Kevin and Annie were on Bobby’s right while Sam and a very hungover looking Victor filled out the left side of the six person table.

“Rough night?” Dean teased.

“It aint over yet,” Victor lamented.

“Ooof! Been there, man. More bacon’ll help.”

Just then their server returned with two extra chairs and a busser slid in two extra place settings for them. “Thank you— thank you both. Seriously.”

“Of course, let me get you some menus.” Then the server disappeared in a flurry, weaving through the crowd of people in various states of dress and sobriety.

Kevin nudged Gibson with his elbow. “How was the sleepover at Dean’s? I bet he snores.”

Everyone around the table laughed.

“Bite me, Kev. Gibby, steal me one of his fries would ya?”

Gibson looked back and forth between the two men. “What?! No.”

Dean just shrugged. “He deserved it.”

“Two wrongs don’t make it alright,” Gibson told him knowingly.

“Yeah, UNCLE DEAN,” Sam butted in.

“From the mouths of babes,” Annie said, shaking her head in amusement. 

Kevin just laughed and took an obnoxious Dean-sized bite of fries.

“So— last day on tour until school’s out, what do you want to do today?” Bobby asked the star of the table.

“Is Mom and Dad awake? I want to see them ‘fore Grammy comes and gets me.”

“And you will, dude. I’m guessing they’re just up in their rooms getting dressed or something. It’s still early yet.”

“What timezone are you in?!” Bobby gave Dean the stink eye.

Dean ignored his manager and just ruffled Gibson’s hair. The menus appeared and they all settled in for another hour of each other’s company. 

        Dean knew it had to be hard for Gibson when they were on tour, he’d lived his own childhood with his dad barely there. But to have both parents out of reach for months at a time seemed worse. That’s why they made sure to give Pam and Lee breaks on the road, fly them home for three days at a time when they could. And they let Gibson come along when he didn’t have school.

It still felt like a worse case scenario though. He didn’t even have a little brother to make the days go by faster. Lee’s mom and their nanny were all he had outside of school friends. And the dogs. At least the kid got pets too.

Dean never did.

“Full House, bitches!” Charlie declared and threw her cards into the center of the table. “Jacks over twos.”

“You’ve got to be shitting me,” Madison exclaimed, leaning in to inspect Charlie’s hand herself. She’d tagged along with Lee’s mom down to San Diego so she could join in on the Vegas leg of the trip. 

“She always pulls it out, I swear to god. I don’t know how, but she does,” Sam muttered and tossed his hand to Dean to shuffle for the next round.

They were an hour into the trip to Vegas and the mood on the bus was contagious. No more little ears and eyes to worry about, meant that the bottles and the bongs came out and the chips were stacked high across the tiny table. 

“Alright, alright, fair hand. Get your cards in, and maybe you can win some of them stacks back. If you’re lucky,” Dean taunted, collecting the rest of cards and sliding them back into a deck to be shuffled. “Trouble? Ante up.”

You tossed your share into the pot and took another sip of your drink. Dean felt your eyes on him as he dealt, bottom lip between his teeth in concentration. Technically, he knew everyone was watching him as he doled the next hand, but your attention felt heavier the last few days. Maybe you knew something he wasn’t ready for you to know.

Maybe you were waiting for him to fuck up again.

Or maybe it was all just wishful thinking and you weren’t really watching him at all. Either way, he was preoccupied with it all when he picked up his cards to find absolute trash.

“Oh Christ. I’m going to need more to drink. KEVIN! Another round of shots, if you don’t mind?”

You chuckled. “Dealer can’t deal to himself, huh?”

“Apparently not,” Dean muttered, not even bothering to pick up his cards again.

“More chances for the rest of us at least,” Madison pointed out and placed her call bet.

The afternoon turned into night while Bobby drove on. Games and ridiculousness ensued. Just when they stopped for dinner, Dean found himself in the playful overlap of drunk and stoned. 

He hummed a few bars of some pop number that was playing over the truckstop speakers and Kevin joined in in harmony as they trudged across the parking lot to the twenty four hour diner. Lee came in for the chorus and they started getting louder and sillier with it, doing the monkey walk with Dean in the middle of the two shorter guys.

Dean couldn’t hear the radio station any longer, but they carried it along, finishing the number strong while guessing at some of the lyrics. When everyone had reached the double doors of the restaurant, he caught you and Charlie with your phones up recording the shenanigans. Meanwhile, Sam and Madison were giggly, leaning a little heavier on one another than most people would be at just after seven at night.

“Alright, cool it you damn buffoons. Let’s see if they’ve got room for everyone,” Bobby grunted before disappearing inside.

“Looks like you guys are the fun bus!” Donna greeted, as SPS and company caught up with them.

“Just gettin’ started darlin’,” Dean drawled, nodding and smirking. “Though I doubt it’s all charades and crochet on Big Bertha over there either.”

Jody took a swig off of her flask. “Oh, fuck no. Nancy knits, but that’s about it. But that’s only when the Adderall kicks in.”

She dangled the metal bottle out towards the circle of waiting musicians in offering. Kevin and Pam both took a pull and passed it back. Then the equipment rig pulled in and the headcount shot up even more. Benny sauntered over with a knowing glint in his eye as he stepped right in between Dean and Donna. 

“We think we gettin’ in or gotta spread out to the fast food joints?”

“Hard to say, looks pretty dead in there, but that might mean there’s a small staff too,” you answered as everyone’s head craned to look inside.

“Alright, well I’m heading over to the cancer section until we hear one way or the other,” Jody nodded towards Annie and Patience smoking down the sidewalk. 

Dean perked up and followed her like an earnest puppy. He wasn’t a habitual smoker anymore, but he definitely still imbibed, especially on the road. Sam’s influence could only go so far. But oddly, you were trailing along behind him, followed by Jesse and a newer, yet awkward roadie that he’d only heard called Chief.

You actually pulled a pack out of your purse and held one out to Dean expectingly. “What?” you asked like an accusation.

“Are you just smoking because you’d knew I would be or—?”

You exhaled your first pull and offered him your lighter. “It’s been a fucking week, okay? Let me have this until we hit the states with actual vegetation and I have to deal with allergies too.”

Dean lit his cigarette nodding and blew out a smoke ring. “You don’t have to justify it to me, I was just checking I’m not the bad influence.”

You rolled your eyes. “You’re always a bad influence, doesn’t mean I still didn’t choose it.”

That got him a little hot, if he was being honest. And he felt his smile all the way to the tips of his ears. “Damn, Trouble. Always knocking me back on my heels, you know that?”

You took another drag and shrugged, looking around to see everyone else somehow in their own conversations. “Part of the job.”

“Nah, that parts all you.” Dean said without even meaning to.

You looked up at him and gave him a little squint. “You need to eat something or you’re gonna be miserable in a couple hours.”

“I’m trying!” He huffed, gesturing with his cigarette towards the front doors, right as Bobby made his glorious return.

“Listen up!” Bobby glanced around at the bands and accumulated crew. “They’ve only got room for thirty folks, so line up and whoever is stuck at the back’s gotta find something else. We’re pulling out of here no later than ten o’clock, so be on time or be left behind.”

You chuckled over the hard-learned line.

Dean sucked a deep pull off his cigarette, trying to speed through it and getting lightheaded in the process. 

“Uh,” he exhaled and looked over at you then over you towards the rest of businesses in the travel center. “We trying to get in or we taking a walk?”

“I’m finishing my square.” You pointed to yourself and held up your cigarette.

Dean couldn’t get over your sass tonight. “Alright, then. A walk it is.”

It ended up with Jody and Patience sticking around while you and Dean finished smoking and then all four of you headed to the Arby’s across the parking lot. 

“Alright, folks, we got a quick segment at the end to wrap things up. Phantom Traveler, are you ready to ‘Hit It or Quit It’?” the gruffer DJ asked them from his chair across the room.

They barely all fit in the little sound booth, but managed to squeeze together to make it work. Lee, Pam and Kevin were on the three stools they provided, while Dean and Sam hovered over them to get at the shared mic. It was six o’clock in the morning and Dean didn’t know if any of them had even slept. But there they were anyway.

“It is five questions we ask in rapid succession and you just say the first thing that comes to mind. And since all five of you are here, we’ll just go down the line— or clockwise I guess,” the younger DJ explained.

“I’m game!” Dean exclaimed, futsing with the ball cap on his head.

Pamela, who was holding the mic, winked. “Let’s hear ‘em, boys.”

The DJs laughed. “Alright, Pamela’s ready. First question: Who’s got the craziest ex’s of the band?”

Everyone ‘Oh’d!’.

Lee leaned in and said deeply into the mic. “I’m sitting right here!” 

“Couldn’t have planned that one any better!” Dean teased.

“Wait! I want to hear the answer though!” Kevin butted in, steering them back on track.

“NEW KID doesn’t know these things yet!” The first DJ said excitedly.

“Oh, this is too easy, though,” Pam rumbled.

“Yeah, sorry, bro, everyone knows this one,” Dean tacked on.

“Eat me,” Sam snapped back.

“But yeah, it’s Sammy for sure,” Lee agreed.

Sam rolled his eyes but the DJs just ate it up.

“Okay! Second question is—- for—- Lee! Favorite venue you’ve ever played?”

“Seriously? He gets a real question and I got a Cosmo question?” Pamela said, annoyed, but not quite into the mic.

“Seriously— I’m just reading off the list,” the younger DJ promised, holding up a clip board.

“That one’s easy— Harvelle’s back home.”

“Hands down,” Sam agreed.

“Best burgers in Nebraska, too,” Dean tacked on.

“Ellen’s gonna kill you,” Pam warned.

“Totally worth it,” Dean shot her down.

“Yeah. Nothing like playing for your hometown,” Lee finished.

“What a bunch of saps!” The older guy teased. “Okay, okay, I’ll let you have it. Sam— third question: Who would you still like to collaborate with? You’ve got Annie Hawkins on the latest album, you’ve played with some of the greats at some special events— I know you all were close with the late, great Rufus Turner and now you’re touring with his granddaughter’s band Sheriffs, Psychics and Secretaries. Who else?”

“Uh, honestly? I’d kill to play with Sarah and Provenance, even though our sounds are totally different. Maybe Mick Davies? Especially now that he’s left Men of Letters, I am looking forward to what he works on next.”

“Wow— those are not names I expected to come up today. But, yeah, okay— always the wildcard Sam Winchester!” The younger DJ seemed genuinely surprised and maybe even impressed.

Dean could tell it annoyed Sam, but he was always way smarter than anybody gave his bodybuilder-shaped self credit for.

“DEAN! Question numero four: If you weren’t a rockstar— okay, musician– what would you be doing?”

“Right now I’d be sleeping, that’s for damn sure.”

Everyone laughed and nodded. “I don’t blame you there, but for a job?”

Dean scratched his three day stubble. “I always say I’d have made a killer mechanic or car restorer, but, uh, honestly at this point in my life I’m going to go with firefighter.”

“Nice, very heroic.” The first DJ approved.

“Dude!” Sam gave him a look that asked if he was alright.

Dean shrugged. “Well, hopefully we won’t have to find out. Just a reminder we’ve got two shows at Cesar’s Palace tomorrow night and Wednesday!” he plugged like they needed help selling tickets.

“Which are completely sold out! We’ve got tickets for our listeners tomorrow morning at seven, eight and nine if you listen for the code to play.” The younger DJ picked up where Dean left off. “One more question and you guys can get on with your days. And it’s for Kevin Tran— the newest member of the band, stepping up for the now reclusive Cas Novak. Fifth and final question!---”

Dean flinched at Cas’ name coming up, but all things considered, it could have been a much more brutal comment. Out of the corner of his eye, Dean saw Bobby whisper something to you through the glass in the adjoining room.

“In one word describe your bandmates.”

“One word total or—?”

“One word a piece,” Sam clarified.

“Yeah one word total. Band. That’d be the worst question answered ever,” the first DJ joked.

“Okay, okay, I got it. For Pam I’ll say ‘badass’. Lee’s word will be ‘groovy’. Sam gets ‘salad’ and Dean can have ‘Trouble’.”

“Oh, fuck,” Lee actually had to cover his mouth. While everyone else just about choked on their own spit. 

Dean glared at the kid, but didn’t say anything, counting down from twenty in his head.

“It is going to be a very long tour, folks,” Sam tried to ease some of the tension, clearly the DJs did not get the significance of what was just said.

“Alright that is a wrap with Phantom Traveler, in town for just a few days on the start of their latest tour. Thank you guys, it was a blast. Their fifth album drops next month. You guys have been digging the new single, so we’re gonna close with that as we get these guys on their way.”

The intro to ‘Baby’ played in the background as everyone handed over their headphones and shook the DJs' hands. Their marketing people came in for some quick publicity shots. Dean spotted you getting matching angles, where you stood behind their photographer, for the band’s socials.

God, he wasn’t ready. He had no idea if you caught what Kevin had said or if you knew he was really talking about you. The little punk had to go and say that shit on air of all places. 

One thing was for sure, Dean’s time was running out. Sooner or later somebody was going to let it slip and it wasn’t fair to you to hear it from anyone but him. Now, he just had to figure out how.

Tagging:

@deans-spinster-witch

@mrswhozeewhatsis

@cosicas-cuquis

@fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like

@suckitands33

@ladysparkles78

@deans-baby-momma

@stoneyggirl2

@sassy-pelican

@leigh70

@globetrotter28

@winharry

@lastactiontricia

@rockhoochie

@brightlilith

@coldhearted93

@djs8891

@beautiful-places-blog

@n-o-p-e-never

@spxideyver

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

*Y/N in a hospital bed and Dean sitting in a chair next to it*

Dean: Is it painful?

Y/N: What? Being stabbed, or sitting here talking to you?

[bunnysbrainrot]

If You Change Your Mind

Relationship: Dean Winchester x Reader, friends(?) to lovers

Summary: For about half a year, you’ve hunted alongside the Winchester brothers to find a purpose in their ‘family business’. But, it seems that Dean’s harsh attitude is driving the two of you away from one another. What happens when that tension breaks, and his truth is revealed?

A/N: I plan on writing more for this, so expect more to come!

No content warnings, just some tension!

Though you had been working alongside Sam and Dean for a few months, practicing your skills as a hunter, your relationship with the older brother hadn’t been the easiest. Dean had a talent of being condescending even without words, which was discouraging to your hard work. Sure, you hadn’t been a hunter nearly as long as Dean, but hell, you were trying your damn hardest to improve. Sam, when you had brought it up, explained that Dean had a ‘hard time opening up’, which you knew better than anyone, at this point.

In the beginning of your working with the brothers, you had taken a liking to Dean, to put it lightly. His rugged demeanor and nonchalant attitude drew you in. He knew how to have a good time, had an amazing sense of humor, and could flirt with anyone as easy as breathing. All except for with you. Somehow, when Dean was with you, he couldn’t find the right way to approach… anything.

That is, until a hunt last week. It was a simple salt and burn, out in the countryside of Georgia. Dean had been distant, only speaking when necessary, but growing frustrated with you for futile reasons. Eventually, the two of you had a full blown argument: you pleaded with him to be more patient, that he was being too harsh on you as a new hunter. For Dean, he was rambling on how much of a ‘dumbass’ you were, getting too risky on hunts.

After that argument, you kept quiet. Ever since then, Dean barely looked at you, let alone said any words your way. Eventually you realized the toll it had taken on you, leaving you feeling out of place and drained. If it weren’t for Sam encouraging you to confront Dean, you considered planning on heading back home, if it could even be considered that anymore.

Taking a deep breath as you walked into the bunker, you spotted Dean seated at a long mahogany table, legs kicked up as he scrolled through his phone. While you were out you picked up food, burgers to be more specific, unintentionally Dean’s favorite. You had picked up orders for both brothers, since you didn’t go out on your own errands too often. Approaching the table, heart racing slightly wilder than before, you placed the paper bag near Dean, took out your own food, and began to walk off. A silent olive branch, the Dean Winchester way.

His voice rang throughout the room as you walked off, stopping you in your tracks.

“So, what? You’re just gonna ignore me, is that it?”

You turned to face him now, heart in your throat at the confrontation. Dean didn’t make this shit easy by any means. Confrontation was already difficult as is, and the eldest Winchester son challenged that further.

“I think you made it pretty clear you didn’t want to be talked to, Dean,” your voice was shaky despite the firm sentence you chose. Dean narrowed his eyes at you before taking a swig of his beer.

“Just been going through a lot lately, I guess,” his tone was terse, like there was a dam of emotions waiting to burst open. “Yeah, I’ve been a little distant, but you gotta stop thinking it’s all about you.”

Something in you snapped at that, glaring at Dean as you replied, “That’s bullshit and you know it. Everything changed after that shapeshifter hunt a few weeks ago. You’ve barely said a word to me. And that case out in Georgia only made it worse.”

Dean looked at you for a moment, studying your expression and sudden reaction to his remarks. He nodded as he listened, but you knew it wasn’t him taking it in. It was the specific Dean nod that meant he was ready to unleash how he felt. The pursed lips said it all.

“Fine. Maybe I have been ignoring you. There’s some truth there, but trust me. You have no idea why I’m doing this. You probably think it’s because I’m mad at you for screwing up, but it’s more than that.”

“Then, what is it?” You demanded, eyebrows raised as you awaited a better explanation.

“It’s for a reason.”

“And what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Honestly? I don’t want to see you get ganked just because you’re a dumbass on a hunt.”

That remained to be his only response for a long pause. “I think you don’t care about your life as much as others do, so yeah… that pisses me off a bit.”

“Pisses you off so much that you treat me like I don’t exist,” you muttered, but he had already caught your retort. Dean’s jade green eyes darted to you. But, for a good while, he never gave a reply.

“If this is the way you show you’re concerned,” you began, “then maybe it would be good to learn some ‘people skills’.”

He sucked his teeth, looking away with a smug smile. Your eyebrows knitted together in frustration at him. Dean stood from his spot, walking over to you. You always forgot just how impressive he was until he stood toe to toe with you - his muscular physique and sharp features had always made you nervous, and the sensation they sent through you now was beyond confusing. It was hard to tell if your stomach was turning over itself or if your senses were distorted from this man staring you down.

“Oh I know people, don’t get me wrong,” he started, his voice lowered, “and believe me, I know more about you than you think.”

Your eyebrows arched in confusion at this, mulling over in your head at what the hell he could’ve meant.

“What…?”

“Oh, you were easy to understand. Practically see through. I knew what you wanted from the start,” Dean seemed to be speaking more clearly now, that hidden kernel of resentment now popping open.

“Listen, I’m just telling you this now, this whole ‘lovey dovey’ crap doesn’t mix well with hunters. You wanna bang? Better find someone on the road. Now for me… that’s when shit gets complicated.”

You could hardly wrap your head around what he was saying, noticing that he was far more than two steps ahead of you in this. Your throat was taught, straining to respond to him.

“Nothing is getting in the way, Dean. You’re seeing this all wrong.”

He shook his head, prodding his pointer finger into your collarbone. “You know that’s bullshit. And I’m telling you… that I know how complicated this would get if things went any further.”

It’s not like you had high hopes to begin with, but now it shattered completely. You looked to the ground, unable to form what you wanted to say.

“How do you know that?”

Dean replied, “Well, item number one… I’m pretty sure you just confirmed your feelings, but item number two, it just would.”

His tone had shifted to something slightly playful, but you didn’t break into a smile just yet. Your head spun as you thought about where this would lead to.

“But what if it doesn’t? What if it works out?”

The hunter looming over you stayed silent, eyes scanning the floor between you. His voice when he spoke next was hushed, almost a whisper.

“Because it would make losing you worse.”

For a split second, time seemed to stop.

“What do you mean?”

He looked at you once more, intently into your eyes as he explained, “In this line of work, getting close to someone is a damn luxury. That’s something I can’t have. Not in a million years, and definitely not with you.”

You opened your mouth to reply, but he cut you off.

“I’ve been a dick, I get it. And listen… I know you didn’t deserve that, and that’s completely on me. And it didn’t help that I didn’t tell you before.”

The only thing the two of you could hear was the faint buzzing of the lamp on the table.

“I don’t trust myself enough for it. If we’re too close, that makes us vulnerable, and the last thing any of us need is a new weak spot for those evil sons of bitches out there.”

Now with a heavier heart, you looked at Dean, unable to look anywhere but his eyes. A sad light had taken over his expression, more emotion than you had seen from him in weeks.

“I,” he said in a hushed tone, “listen…. I want this. You. If I knew that this could work, and everything would be okay, I would take that chance in a heartbeat.”

Something mixed inside of you, a strange muddled feeling of heartbreak and hope. Where did this leave them? What happens now?

“But,” your head snapped up at attention, “it’s not like I don’t wanna try. I’m just… shit, I’m scared to death of what could happen.”

A feeling in your gut tugged at his words, the weight of the truth in them. Dean let out a long breath, seeming to gain his composure. You noticed how his demeanor changed while he stood in front of you - from one of a fierce man, to one so vulnerable.

“Dean,” you started, hoping to give him some sort of comfort. You could only imagine how difficult this was for him, but there wasn’t the faintest idea of what to say to make this situation better.

“Well, I guess we know how we feel about each other. At least, a little.” There was a sense of hope in those words, like the optimism of your tone would change this discouraging outcome. “And, if you ever change your mind, about this whole ‘us’ thing not working, I think you’ll know where to find me.”

The words hung in the air.

“You would know it better than anyone, Dean.”

————

Chapter 2 is up! Thank you for reading!

[mxltifxnd0m]

tell me why i never put the pieces to together that in szn 4 when sam and dean are sent to that workplace AU by the angels that their last names are based on the gun company Smith and Wesson?!!

like me and my friend were talking about it and wondered why dean had a basic ass last name then we realized why it was like that

dean smith

sam wesson

Smith and Wesson guns

and then their actual last names are also based on the winchester gun brand 😭😭

eric kripke you will always be famous for this in my heart

[starlvenus]

Old friends

warnings! none :p sam winchester x gn!reader summary: Sam winchester's hunt wasn't going well.. leading him to a diner where he would reunite with an old friend from Stanford. __

Sam wasn't having a good day so far.. Everything he and Dean were doing for this hunt was all thrown out the window, all of their research was wrong, only because someone gave them a fake tip, leading them to think it was a whole different monster.

The most mundane diner was ahead; the red sign on the roof shined brightly.

Sam sighed pushing the door open, the overhead bell chiming loudly as he entered. The smell of coffee fills his nostrils, only momentarily distracting him from his chaotic day. 

His eyes scanned the menu, picking out what he would order, Burgers, Fries, and of course, pie for dean. His eyes narrow slightly as he tries to find a healthier option for himself.

He orders pretty quickly, shooting the waitress a small smile after he finishes. He shuffles in the seat trying to find a comfortable position.

His eyes observe the patrons in the diner. An elderly couple chatting over some coffee, a group of young teenagers, that's when he sees a familiar set of headphones, the sides adorned with those "nerdy" stickers, a nostalgic reminder to his time back at Stanford. Sam couldn't help but watch discreetly, taking in their new look, shorter hair, different style, yet his eyes were drawn onto that same bag.. His eyes scanned its pins and keychains seeing the small cat pin he had gifted was still there. Sitting in the spot he chose, nudged between a video game pin, and a movie pin.

Sam sat there contemplating whether to approach, doubt lingered in Sam's mind. Slightly remembering the times he and Dean were thrown onto tv screens..

readers pov I guess it was a pretty nice day.. I have a day off from work and nothing has gone wrong yet. The diner was pretty small and it had decent food, plus everything I've been drawing hasn't turned to shit! 

I got my pencil case out, taking out a few colours, a light blue, pink, yellow, green and a teal. I almost instantly start to colour in the little sketch, layering the colours randomly. My head bobs along to the beat of the song playing in my ears, the headphones slightly getting rid of the noises in the diner. The corners of my lips lift gently, creating a content smile.

  It wouldn't take long until I sensed someone looking at me.I tore my eyes away from my book and scanned the diner. My eyes would momentarily pass a familiar figure; this made me do a double take. His eyes widened slightly as I caught him, his eyes quickly darted away focusing on the table in front of him. I look away as well.. A little bit embarrassed. After a few minutes passed I looked back at the man.. Is that Sam? Sam winchester? My mind wanders back to my time in Stanford, Sam and I were pretty much best friends.. Well that's how it felt to me.  We met in an Art history class and pretty much became class buddies until one day we decided to meet outside of class. Then one day he pretty much disappeared.. Leaving me disappointed, and without my friend. I sat there for a bit debating if I should go over to him, just to say hi or maybe engage in small talk about how his life was going.

  I sat here contemplating whenever to approach him. I decided to pack up my pencils and books, hastily shoving them back into my bag. I removed the headphones from my ears, letting them hang around my neck. Before leaving the table, I put the small mug on top of the plate, making it easier for the waitress to get the dishes. I take a small deep breath and get up. Grabbing my bag and walking over to where Sam sat. whatever pov :p Their boots make heavy footsteps, prompting Sam to look up. Their eyes lock, and they offer a small wave accompanied by a slight smile.

Before they speak, they shuffle into the booth, taking the slightly uncomfortable seat in front of him.

"Hey, um, you're Sam Winchester, right?" Despite already knowing the answer, they feel compelled to confirm, just in case. Sam smiles slightly, his eyes narrowing, trying to place you. "Yeah, It's me.” he pauses “It's Y/N right?" They smile at him recognizing them, "yeah! it's me" they pauses for a bit unsure of what to say to one of their past friends "i- this might be insensitive of me but- what happened? why'd you.. Leave?" Sam looks down, remembering the incident. The memory still burned into his mind. "Family business.” He pauses before speaking again. “I had no say in it, really. It's a long.. complicated story.” His eyes shifted around the diner as his thoughts drifted back to that night. He sighs and continues “But you know that's not important, what have you been up to? You look good”

they swallow and nod, a small reassuring smile on their face. "Oh well thank you! decided to change up a few things.." they mumble slightly. "You look good too! your hairs grown pretty long" Sam grins slightly and looks down, a little embarrassed by the compliment"Yeah, the hair has certainly grown longer"  He looks back at you, his eyes searching for something. A question crosses his mind. He remembers the last time you two spoke, he asked about your plans for the future. "How about that degree? Still pursuing it?" They shrug a little “nah.. A few months after you left I realised that it was really for me and I left to do other things..” they fidget with their fingers “But… I still have student loans which is unfortunate” they give Sam an awkward smile, their feet swaying back and forth under the table. 

Sam chuckles slightly at your feet swinging, it brought back old memories of you tapping your feet together.

 "So, what have you been up to these days? I'm sure your talents were put somewhere else."

Sam and Y/N sit there for ages, just talking about how everything is going, what they have been doing since they last saw each other.. Despite Sam already getting all his food, they continue to sit there just chatting away. It wasn't until Dean called Sam, whining and grumbling about where he was and why he was taking so long.. Sam came up with a quick lie about how the diner was filled with a bunch of people. Sam hangs up and looks at you “look.. im sorry but I've got to get back to my brother” Y/n smiles “oh- yeah that's okay!” They pause and watch him pack up the now lukewarm food. Y/N hesitated before speaking, but went for it “I- do you want my number? Maybe we can chat sometime?” Sam paused, contemplating the offer, and then nodded with a smile, "Yeah, sure."

[cheynovak]

Texas sky – part 4

Summary: Y/N, a former cast member of Supernatural, had left Texas for LA several years ago, citing career reasons but also escaping unresolved personal issues. During a reunion party in Austin, she reconnects with Jensen Ackles, who is still married to Danneel but also struggling with his own difficulties.  He confronts Y/N about her sudden departure and their past, hoping things might turn out differently this time.  

Warnings: Friend to lovers, old love rediscovering, marriage problems, cheating, alcohol, hurt, anger, fluff, ...  

English is not my first language   

*This story is my own original story, please do not copy my work, reblog/comments/likes are appreciated* 

Jensen was already awake when I stirred, his soft green eyes watching me with a tenderness that made my heart ache. His hand hoovering over my cheek and then my lips, I felt it, even though he didn't touch me.

Neither of us dared to address it, not wanting to shatter the fragile peace that lingered between us. Yesterday we spent all day in bed, just holding each other, fingers drawing circles on each other's skin. Lips occasionally finding the other for a passionate moment. Until we fell asleep.

He smiled softly as I blinked away the remnants of sleep, and his whispered "good morning" was laced with the unspoken truth of what we both knew was coming.

Instead, he asked if he could take a shower, and I nodded, my voice caught in my throat. I knew he was stalling, that he was trying to hold on to these final moments just as desperately as I was. And I didn’t care. I wanted him here with me, for as long as I could have him, even if it was only for a little while longer. As I watched him disappear into the bathroom, I knew that once the water stopped and the steam cleared, reality would come rushing back in.

I slipped out of bed and stood there, leaning against the doorframe, watching Jensen as the water cascaded over his shoulders. His posture was tense, his head bowed under the stream, and I could see the weight of his thoughts in the way his muscles strained. The sight tugged at something deep inside me, an ache I couldn’t ignore. Before I knew it, I had moved closer, stepping into the shower behind him, the warm water instantly soaking my white shirt and black silk panties.

I wrapped my arms around him from behind, pressing my cheek against his broad, damp shoulder. For a moment, we just stood there, letting the water wash over us, as if it could cleanse away the pain that clung so stubbornly between us.

“I should be happy,” I whispered, my voice barely audible over the sound of the water. “And in a way, I am. But it hurts, Jensen. It hurts that you’re going back.”

He didn’t turn around, but his hand came up to cover mine where it rested on his chest. “I want to be with you,” he said, his voice raw, stripped of all pretense. “But I can’t leave my kids. If it was just Danneel, I’d divorce her right now, but... I’m scared she’d take them from me.”

His words hit me like a punch to the gut, the stark honesty in them both a comfort and a curse. I knew he meant every word, that his love for his children was the one thing that held him back. And I couldn’t blame him for that. How could I?

Tears pricked at my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. I pressed my face harder against his shoulder, holding him tighter, as if I could somehow fuse our bodies together and make the world outside disappear.

“I know,” I murmured, my voice breaking. “I know you can’t leave them. And I would never ask you to.”

As the water cooled around us, we remained locked in each other’s embrace, the world outside fading away. When Jensen finally turned to face me, his hands moved gently over my body, the warmth of his touch sending shivers through me. He smiled softly, his gaze drifting down to the wet shirt clinging to my skin, his thumb brushing over my hardened nipple. The sensation was electric, a reminder of the connection we had, one that went beyond words.

"I’ll find a way," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. His lips found mine in a tender, lingering kiss that held all the promises he couldn’t speak out loud. "Just give me a little more time," he begged softly, his forehead resting against mine.

I nodded, my mind barely processing the action. How could I say no when his words were filled with such desperation? I wanted to believe him, to trust that he would find a way for us to be together. But deep down, I knew the reality we faced. Still, I nodded, because in that moment, I couldn’t bear to do anything else.

His hands continued their slow exploration of my body, as if he was memorizing every curve, every line, for when he’d have to let go. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer, our bodies pressed together under the cooling water. We kissed again, a kiss that was both a promise and a goodbye, neither of us willing to let go just yet.

But eventually, the water turned cold, and the reality of the world outside this shower intruded once more. Jensen pulled back slightly, his green eyes searching mine, filled with a mixture of longing, regret, and something that looked painfully like hope.

"Just a little more time," he whispered again, as if trying to convince himself as much as me. I nodded again, this time more slowly, feeling the weight of what I was agreeing to.

--

Months had slipped by in a blur of stolen moments and secret rendezvous, each one leaving me more torn than the last. Jensen would sneak into my house whenever he could, his presence both a comfort and a source of deepening guilt. Every time he kissed me, the world felt right, but when he left, the wrongness of it all came crashing down around me.

I tried to push the thoughts aside, to bury them beneath the heat of our passion, but they always resurfaced, especially when he would pull away just when I needed him the most. Each time I’d ask him when things would change, when we could stop hiding, and each time, he’d ask for more time, whispering promises I was beginning to doubt he could keep.

But not today.

Today, I was done with the excuses, done with the half-truths and empty reassurances. I reminded myself I promised myself not to be a mistress, never be the homewrecker. Yet here I was breaking my own self worth, my own promise.

As soon as he stepped through the door, I didn’t greet him with the usual warmth. Instead, I stood firm, my arms crossed over my chest, the weight of everything we’d become hanging heavy between us.

“Jensen, this has to stop,” I said, my voice flat, betraying none of the turmoil inside me.

He looked at me, confusion crossing his features. “What do you mean? I thought we—"

“I’m tired of the lies,” I cut him off, my tone sharper than I intended. “You keep telling me you need more time, but nothing is changing. We’re still hiding, still sneaking around like we’re ashamed of what we have. What’s the point if all we’re ever going to be is a secret?”

Jensen’s face fell, the hopeful light in his eyes dimming. He opened his mouth to respond, but I didn’t give him the chance.

“Do you even want me, Jensen? Or is this just some fantasy for you? Because it feels like you’re perfectly content keeping me hidden away, only coming to me when it’s convenient for you.” My voice was rising, the frustration and hurt I’d been holding back for weeks finally spilling over.

I didn't mean it.

Jensen looked like a beaten dog, his shoulders slumping as the words hit him. He reached out for me, but I stepped back, needing the distance to keep from breaking down completely.

“Don’t,” I said, my voice trembling. “Don’t touch me unless you can tell me the truth. Unless you can tell me what you really want.”

“I want you,” he whispered, but the words felt hollow, as if even he didn’t believe them anymore.

“Then why does it feel like I’m nothing more than a dirty little secret to you?” The pain in my chest was nearly unbearable, but I refused to let the tears fall.

“I’m not trying to hurt you,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’m just... I’m scared.”

“Scared of what?” I demanded, my hands shaking. “Scared of being with me? Or scared of leaving her?”

He looked down at the floor, unable to meet my gaze. “Both,” he admitted after a long pause, the word barely more than a whisper.

The admission hung in the air between us, heavy and suffocating. For a moment, neither of us spoke, the silence louder than any argument we could have had.

“I can’t do this anymore, Jensen,” I finally said, my voice breaking. “I can’t keep being your secret, your escape. I deserve more than that. We deserve more than that.

“I know,” he said, his voice full of regret. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry isn’t enough,” I whispered, feeling the tears finally spill over. “You need to decide what you really want, Jensen. And if it’s not me, then...”

I couldn’t finish the sentence. The thought of him choosing her, of losing him for good, was too much to bear.

Jensen took a step towards me, his hand reaching out as if to comfort me "Y/N. please..." , but I shook my head, stepping back again.

“Don’t,” I said, my voice barely audible. “I need to be alone. And I think you need some time to think."

For a moment, he hesitated, his hand hovering in the air between us, but then he let it fall to his side. He nodded, his face a picture of devastation, before he turned and walked out the door, leaving me standing there, heartbroken and unsure if I’d ever see him again.

The words I’d just said to Jensen echoed endlessly in my mind, haunting me with their truth: I can’t keep being your escape. I deserve more than that. We deserve more than that. The weight of those words felt too familiar, as if history was repeating itself.

I couldn’t help but remember the night before his wedding. He had invited me to his bachelor party, a gesture that had surprised me given the circumstances. But I hadn’t shown up at the club, too caught up in my own emotions after a disastrous date. I’d told myself it was better to stay away, to give him space on the eve of his new life. But that plan had shattered when I heard the sound of car horns outside my door.

--

Jensen’s car had pulled up, the windows down, and I could hear Jared and the others calling my name, urging me to join them. I was about to turn back inside, to ignore the noise, when Jensen himself got out of the car. He was tipsy, his smile easy and charming, but when he saw me, his expression shifted. He noticed something was wrong, his eyes narrowing in concern.

“Hey, what’s going on? You never came to the pub?” he asked, his voice softer than I expected. "Horrible date, norhing to worry." I answered, "Go, have fun tonight."

I saw the shock in his eyes before he looked at Jared and told him to head back to the club, promising that we’d be there in a minute.

Once the cars drove away, we stood there for a moment, the night air heavy with the things neither of us wanted to say. Finally, I walked inside, and he followed me, my heart pounding in my chest.

We sat on the tiny couch in my living room, the silence between us growing heavier by the second. He didn’t press me for details about what had happened on my date, and I didn’t offer any. Instead, we just sat there, close enough to feel the warmth of each other’s presence but far enough to keep the unsaid words from spilling over.

“I didn’t know you were dating?” he finally asked, breaking the silence.

I shrugged, unable to meet his eyes. “Just, you know, trying to.” He didn’t push further, but I could feel his gaze on me, searching for answers I wasn’t ready to give.

“Y/N,” he said quietly, “You know you’re my best friend, right? I mean, I know things are changing, but that’s not going to.”

The words were meant to be comforting, but they only made the ache in my chest worse. I nodded, forcing a smile, but inside, I felt like I was falling apart.

“Jensen, you’re getting married tomorrow,” I said, my voice trembling slightly. “Things are already changing, whether we want them to or not.” And it's not the change I wished for. I thought.

He looked at me then, really looked at me, and for a moment, it felt like he could see right through all the walls I had built up. His gaze was so intense, so filled with a mix of emotions, that I couldn’t hide anything from him even if I tried. He reached out and took my hand, his grip warm and reassuring, but instead of comforting me, it only made me feel more unsteady, like I was on the edge of something I wasn’t ready to face.

“Tell me,” he said, his voice gentle but firm. “What’s really going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

I hesitated, feeling the weight of the moment pressing down on me. All the years of unspoken words, of buried feelings, were bubbling up to the surface, and I didn’t know if I had the strength to hold them back anymore.

“I’m just... I’m tired, Jensen,” I finally whispered, my voice cracking with the strain of holding back tears. “I’m tired of chasing love. Of always being the one who waits, who hopes, who never gets what she really wants. I want to feel real love... the kind that doesn’t make you question everything, the kind that just is.”

I looked at him. "I want my happy ending." with you.

Before I even realized what was happening, Jensen moved closer, his hand tightening around mine, as if he heard my thougts. The next thing I knew, his lips were on mine, soft and urgent, filled with a longing that matched the ache in my heart. I was stunned, frozen in place, unable to respond as my mind raced to catch up with what was happening.

The kiss was unexpected, a sudden surge of emotion that neither of us seemed prepared for. His lips moved against mine, trying to coax a response, but I was too shocked, too overwhelmed to react. My heart was pounding in my chest, my mind a whirlwind of confusion and desire.

When he finally pulled back, his breath was ragged, his eyes searching mine for any sign of what I was feeling. I could see the fear in his gaze, the fear that he had crossed a line, that he had pushed too far.

“Y/N, I—” he started, his voice trembling.

But I didn’t let him finish. I reached up, my fingers brushing against his lips, silencing him. I wasn’t ready to speak, to acknowledge what had just happened. I was still trying to process it, to understand what it meant.

Jensen’s eyes clouded with uncertainty, his usual confidence wavering as he stared back at me. My thumb brushed over his lips, and I could feel the slight tremble beneath my touch. There was something in his gaze that sent a jolt of nervous energy through me, something that made my heart race and my mind whirl with a thousand possibilities.

“What’s wrong, J?” I asked softly, trying to ground myself, to keep from being swept away by the intensity of the moment.

His hand reached up, covering mine, holding it against his face like he was afraid to let go. “I’m scared,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’m scared of marrying the wrong person, of chasing after something that isn’t real, that doesn’t make me feel… whole.”

The way he looked at me, so raw and open, made my stomach twist. There was a desperation in his eyes, a silent plea for something I wasn’t sure what he meant.

I could feel my nerves spiking, the intensity of his gaze too much to bear. I needed to move, to do something to break the tension before it suffocated us both. I stood up abruptly, needing the distance, needing a drink or anything to distract myself from the way he was looking at me. But before I could take more than a step, Jensen followed, closing the space between us in an instant.

His body pressed against mine, trapping me between him and the counter. I could feel the heat radiating from him, the undeniable evidence of what he wanted pressing into me. His hands were on my waist, fingers digging into my skin as if he couldn’t bear the thought of letting me go. His breath was warm against my ear, and I felt every word as he whispered them.

“Please… don’t go,” he murmured, his lips grazing the sensitive skin of my neck. “I need you. You’re the only one who makes me feel like this, the only one who understands.”

My heart was pounding so loud I could barely hear my own thoughts. The temptation to give in, to let myself be swept away by him, was almost overwhelming. But even as my body responded to his touch, my mind screamed for me to stop.

That’s when the words spilled out, the ones I didn't meant. “I can’t be your escape, Jensen,” I whispered, my voice trembling with the weight of my resolve. “I deserve more than that, more than one night. Let's not ruin this friendship for one night of pleasure.”

Please tell me your want me, not her. Tell me and I'll give you everything. My mind screamed.

He froze against me, the reality of my words sinking in like a cold shock to his system. Slowly, he pulled back just enough to look into my eyes, his expression filled with a mix of hurt and confusion.

“You’re right... I-I'm sorry.” he started, but I cut him off, needing to say it all before I lost the courage.

“You’re about to marry someone, Jensen. Someone who’s supposed to be your everything. But you’re here, with me, looking for… I don’t even know what. And I... I want you happy"

When I thought of that night tears welled up in my eyes. I still refused to let him fall. I couldn’t afford to lose him.

I had let him go so many time, And it hurts every single time.

--

Let me know what you think, like, share or comment <3 If you liked this, please check out my masterlist for other stories.

Taglist:

@kr804573 @nancymcl @suckitands33 @mostlymarvelgirl @globetrotter28

@jackles010378 @hobby27 @call-me-mrs-winchester @winchesterwild78

@deans-baby-momma @deansimpalababy @stefansring @n-o-p-e-never @mayafatimakhan

[zepskies]

If You Want It To Be - Part 3

Pairing: Dean Winchester x F. Reader

Summary: When your car breaks down after a hunt, Sam and Dean tow you back to the bunker for Christmas. This time of year gives you and Dean a little courage to be honest about what you both want. And what you want, is for him to see you. (18+)

AN: And here’s Part 3! This fic is an entry for @deanwinchesterswitch's TGWRC: Christmas in July event. 🩵❄️

Themes: Mistletoe (a classic), eggnog, Christmas dinner

Word Count: 3,600 Tags/Warnings: 18+! Smuttish, fluff and feels.

Part 3: Christmas Day

The next day, Christmas morning comes. You’re up early after a night of somewhat restful sleep (anticipation of today kept you up for a while). 

And so are the guys, though their enthusiasm isn’t as bright as yours. 

Everyone is still in their pajamas, the humans with their mugs of coffee as you corral your friends into the living room by the sparkling, multicolored tree.

During your trip to Walmart on your first night in, you managed to squeeze in some shopping for actual presents. Your wallet now hates you, and likely will until February. 

But it’s worth it to see the guys’ faces when they find their names on gift-wrapped boxes under the tree. Jack in particular wears an expression of wonder, almost like a little kid. It makes you smile. 

Everyone has a small gift from you, though they clearly weren’t expecting it. Sam accepts his parcel from you with an apologetic smile.

“Sorry, I don’t think any of us remembered about this part,” he says.

“No worries,” you wave him off. “It’s just a ‘thank you’ for letting me crash here for the holidays.”

You have a new book for Sam, an old-school Gameboy for Jack, a new set of ties for Castiel. You hold your breath when Dean sits down on the couch to open his. 

He considers the small box with slightly furrowed brows. He glances up at you. 

“What’d you do?” he asks. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“Just open it, Dean,” you reply with a laugh. A smile twitches at his face, and he finally obliges you. 

Inside the black velvet box is a nice silver watch with a leather strap. 

Dean blinks in surprise. He glances over at his empty wrist where his father’s watch used to rest, but he hasn’t replaced it since it broke after the witch hunt in Indiana.  

You come over to sit beside him and point out the new watch’s features.

“This part is adjustable,” you explain. “I figured you could take it off and use the strap for your dad’s watch.”

A slow smile spreads across Dean’s face, warm and somewhat disbelieving. You bought him a whole new watch, just so he could use the leather strap for his old one. 

Something in his heart tightens, and also eases when he looks up at you. You’re smiling, a little nervous. 

And Dean can’t help himself. He cups a hand behind your head and kisses your cheek, wishing he could do more, but not wanting to invite curiosity. Already he can feel Sam’s gaze on both of you.

“Thanks, sweetheart,” Dean says. “This is…it’s real nice. Thank you.” 

But Sam notices the warmth in his brother’s voice, and the way he looks at you. And the way you’re looking at him, like he hung the damn moon. 

It brings a suspicious smile to Sam’s face. 

When you offer to pick up breakfast, Dean intervenes and says you’ve done enough. Sam will get breakfast going, he insists. (And Sam, rolling his eyes, agrees with him.)

“I’m gonna step out for a sec, but I’ll be back,” Dean then says. 

“See ya later,” you reply with a little wave before you go to help Jack set up his Gameboy. Castiel is already sorting through his new ties, arranging them by color, then by pattern on the sofa. 

You glance over your shoulder though, and manage to catch the way Sam pulls his brother aside. You don’t hear what they’re saying, but it sparks your curiosity. 

“What?” Dean asks. Sam raises a brow at him, with a knowing smile. 

“Get her something good,” Sam tells him. 

“Dude, shut up,” Dean holds a finger over his lips and glances over at you. Thankfully, you seem invested in helping Jack. 

“I’m just saying. Put some effort in,” Sam persists. His eyes hold a teasing glint. “Nothing from the gas station.”

“All right, I got it,” Dean snipes back. It’s none of Sam’s business, really, but he already has an idea growing in his mind as he heads down to the garage.

Dean has all but disappeared since this morning. You thought the two of you were going to talk at some point, but you haven’t seen him all day. 

Maybe it’s stupid, but you start to wonder if he’s avoiding you. If the gift was too much…

Sam happens to catch you lost in thought while you’re glazing a large ham in the kitchen.

“Can I help you with anything?” he asks. 

“Sure,” you reply. “Want to peel the potatoes?”

You glance at the bag on the counter. Sam agrees and joins you to wash and start peeling for you. 

“Have you seen Dean?” you ask him, hopefully subtle. 

Sam’s lips start to form a knowing smile, but he dims it down. “He’s probably in the garage.”

“…Oh, right. God forbid I bother him while he’s working on his car,” you joke. Sam glances at you.

“Or yours, most likely,” he says. “He did promise to get it done by today. Didn’t you guys have a little bet going?” 

He knew about that? you think with a blush. 

“That was silly,” you admit. “It’s Christmas. He should just relax.” 

“When my brother says he’s gonna do something, he commits,” Sam says. “He deals with people the same way.”

You raise a brow at him. “What do you mean?”

Sam just smiles, like he knows something you don’t. He finishes peeling the last potato and sets it down on the counter with the rest.

“All right, what’s next?” he asks.

Once the ham is in the oven and the other side dishes you and Sam prepared are set off to cook, you return to your room to shower and get ready for dinner later. 

You decide to wear the dress you found while you were shopping, before you even knew your relationship with Dean would change. 

You almost went with a red lacy one, but there was something about this dress—green velvet, off the shoulder sleeves and flaring at the waist. It’s simple, but pretty. You pair it with some comfortable black flats. 

You spend longer getting ready, only having to redo your eyeliner once this time. Then you steel yourself, gaining some confidence, and you go downstairs. 

Jack is in the kitchen, sneaking a finger in the cranberry sauce.

“I saw that,” you tease. He stiffens like you’ve caught him red-handed. He quickly tucks his hands behind his back. He notices how you’ve cleaned yourself up with a polite nod.

“You look very nice,” he says. 

“Thanks!” you chirp, blushing lightly. “Want to help me set the table?”

Jack obliges you like the nice kid he is. You two set up the long dining table that the guys usually use for research, first with the new red tablecloth, then the plates and silverware and glasses. 

And finally, while Jack checks on the ham in the oven, you place the (fake) gold candleholders on each side of the table. 

Dean comes out of wherever he’s been hiding, right as you’re leaning far over the table to light a candle. You don’t realize how your dress rides up your thighs in the back, but Dean is captivated by the sight for a moment…until he clears his throat. 

“Need some help there, sweetheart?” 

His unexpected voice startles a yelp out of you. You flail as you lose your balance, but he hooks an arm around your waist and prevents you from catching your hand on fire. He brings you flush against him, smirking down at you.

“Nice reflexes,” he teases. “When’s your audition for the Karate Kid?”

“Oh, shut up,” you gripe back. 

You shoot him a playful glare as you rest your palms against his chest. But it loses its effect when you melt into his subsequent kiss. You reach up to twine your arms around his neck, letting your nails graze up the back of his neck and through his hair. 

He shudders a little, with a pleasant hum, making you smile against his lips.

He breaks from you with a customary Dean grin, which is equal parts flirtatious, amused, and a hint cocky.

“Miss me?” he asks. You smile through your blush, but you have to taper down your inclination to say yes. His gaze drags down your body with interest. 

“I like this dress too,” he says, and his voice fairly rumbles. Along with his scrutiny, it makes your face flare with heat. Your fingers play with a button on his shirt, red flannel this time. He rubs the soft velvet along your hip.

You tilt your face up to him, despite your lingering blush. 

“Where’ve you been all day?” you ask. He quirks a smile. 

“I’ll show you,” Dean says. 

Dean takes your hand and leads you downstairs to the garage. 

There you find the remains of your car, which has rusted out parts strewn haphazardly all over the ground. You raise a brow. This is how he fixes your car? 

“You are so not winning the bet.”

Dean snorts. “It’s an old rust bucket. Needs a complete fucking overhaul, or the scrap heap. If you really want, I’ll get the new parts, fix it up top to bottom…or, you could just take a stroll through my garage.”

He gestures around, where classic cars are lined up on either side of you. A wide grin spreads across your face. 

“Oh my God, you’ll let me drive one of these?” you say in excitement. 

“You can pick one out and take it home,” Dean replies. Though he doesn’t want to think about you leaving…maybe you two can talk that over later.

Your smile falters. “What? Dean, no. This is your collection.”

He pulls you in by your waist and gently bucks his hand beneath your chin. 

“Call it my gift to you,” he says. You notice his father’s watch once again rests on his wrist, with the help of the new leather strap you bought for him.  

“You’d really give me a whole freakin’ car?” you ask, tearing up and beaming bright at the same time. 

Dean brushes your cheek tenderly with curled fingers; his answer is in his eyes. You try your best to blink away your would-be tears. He catches the one that falls from the corner of your eye with his thumb.

“Why don’t you go pick one out?” he suggests, nodding behind you. 

Biting your lip, you reach up and kiss him sweetly before you get started. You miss the way Dean blushes a bit. Because you’re already meandering down the line of beautiful old classics. 

Soon enough you stop at an interesting red one.

“Ooh, this one’s nice,” you say. Dean is unimpressed. 

“No,” he shakes his head, crossing his arms. 

“What, why?”

“I ain’t puttin’ you in a Volvo. Come on, you can do better than that.”

“But it’s cute.”

“Remember, you’re gonna be driving across state lines,” he reminds you. “You want something reliable, strong.”

You huff and decide to keep looking, but you lay a gentle hand on the side mirror. 

“I might be back for you. Don’t go anywhere.”

A smile threatens Dean’s lips as he watches you. He knows for sure he’s losing the bet. But it’s worth it for this moment right here.

You flit between the rows of cars. Finally, you stop at a funky mint green one. It reminds you of a car your grandfather had when you were a kid, when he’d take you out for ice cream on a Sunday.

“You like that one?” Dean asks. He walks over and joins you at the car, soothing a hand over its hood.

“I think I do. What is it?” you ask.

“A Ford Thunderbird, 1960.” Dean’s gaze meets yours, and he smiles. “Good choice. 5.8-liter V8 engine. 300 horsepower. This gal was powerful in her time.”

“Let’s see if she still is,” you say with a grin. 

So you and Dean break out the Thunderbird into the open roads of Lebanon, Kansas. 

Dean gives you pointers on driving stick, as it’s been a while for you. But after a few minutes, you regain the hang of it and test the car’s powerful sounding engine. It almost rumbles as loud as Baby. 

“Oh, crap. What about dinner?” you realize. “The guys must be waiting on us.”

“Eh, they’ll live,” Dean says with a grin. “Keep going. There’s a park right around the corner here.”

Sure enough, you’re about to turn into a park that borders on a small, but beautiful lake. You probably should’ve brought a coat; the car’s old heater isn’t doing you much good in your little dress. 

But right now, you don’t care. Because this is a perfect moment, and you don’t think you could be much happier. 

You park the car in view of the sparkling lake. Before Dean can turn to you and ask what you think of the car, you’ve started climbing over the upholstery over to his side. 

“Whoa. Easy tiger,” he chuckles as you grunt and struggle. 

“Here’s my Karate Kid audition,” you joke, earning an even deeper laugh from Dean.

But he helps guide you into his lap, where you straddle his hips and reach down to anchor his seat back. The two of you laugh when it momentarily gets stuck, but Dean is able to fix it. With a turn of his wrist, his seat jerks back and gives you more room to maneuver. 

His warm hands smooth up the back of your thighs while you find purchase on his shoulders. 

“Hmm. You’re cold, babe,” he remarks with a frown, and he rubs your legs more to generate some warmth on your skin. “Should’ve brought your jacket.”

Your legs might be cold, but your face heats up at the way he calls you babe. Like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Like you’re really his.

Your answering smile is both warm and playful.

“Who needs clothes when I’ve got a big, strong, flannel-wearing man to warm me up,” you tease, soothing your hands along his toned arms. 

It lifts his frown into an amused grin, even as he shakes his head and grips your thighs more firmly.

“Oh, so I’m a portable heater now?” he remarks. 

“Yup,” you nod with a grin as you lean down. “Do your job, heater.”

Swiping your hair over your shoulder, you lean down for a sweet kiss. But it quickly gains in passion as his tongue slips past the seam of your lips. His hands move to take a healthy grip of your ass, grinding you down into his lap. 

A pleased sound gets trapped in your throat when you feel his length pressing against your core through his jeans. You slip a hand into his hair, deepening the kiss and nipping at his lower lip.  

You feel like a teenager making out with your boyfriend in some backwoods clearing. But it’s an exhilarating feeling.

You never thought you’d be able to do this. Not with Dean. 

You cup his face in your hands and pull back a bit.   

“I love this car,” you say. “You really gonna give it to me?”

Dean smirks. Once again, your lipstick (though lighter this time) is smudged all over his mouth and chin. You wipe some of it off with your thumb.

“Maybe I won’t,” he says. “Maybe I’ll take my sweet time fixing that rusted out piece of shit sitting in my garage.”

You giggle against him, and his hands smooth up your thighs, rucking up the skirt of your dress.

“Is that your plan?” you reply. “Strand me at the bunker, make sure I can never go home?”

“Something like that,” he says. “Gotta keep my girl close.”

You huff. “Your girl? That’s presumptuous.”

“Oh, really?” Dean gives a deep chuckle. “Weren’t you the one who said this wasn’t a one-time deal?”

“No, you said that. I’m just along for the ride,” you quip.

But you think you’ve teased him too much when his amusement starts to fade. His green eyes dim to embers as he tilts his head.

“Is that right?” he asks. 

You soften, gazing down at him with a more genuine smile. You press your hand to the side of his face, letting your thumb sooth over the apple of his cheek. 

“Dean, of course not,” you say patiently. “It’s you. It’s always been you.”  

That admission is thick in your throat. It comes out at nearly a whisper. 

But then, the shadows begin to clear from Dean’s eyes. His lips curve into a more familiar smile.

He kisses you, and the two of you continue exploring one another. Not to mention, testing the limitations of a reclined car seat.

By the time you two get back to the bunker, the dinner table is a mess. The guys have clearly eaten without you, and now Sam is trying to explain the finer points of football to Cas and Jack in the living room. He pauses when he notices you and his brother walk in.

“Where’ve you guys been?” he asks. But he spies Dean’s hand resting on the small of your back with a smile. “The food is in the kitchen. All you need to do is heat it up.”

“Thanks!” you call to him on your way to the kitchen. 

Dean means to follow you, but he stops short when he sees a framed picture of Mary Winchester hanging on the wall in the living room. He draws closer to it, not realizing that the others are watching him. Most of them with curiosity, and one with hopeful wariness. 

His mouth curves with a slight smile. Someone caught her by surprise. He can tell by the way she’s looking over her shoulder in the 8” by 10” frame. She wears her favorite green jacket—one that Sam bought for her last year. Her hair brushes past her shoulders in a haphazard mix of blonde curls and waves. But her smile. That smile’s even more golden.

“Who put this here?” Dean asks. When he doesn’t get an answer, he glances back and finds his brother’s gaze first. He just smiles, but doesn’t look like the culprit. Dean moves on to Cas, who subtly shakes his head.

Jack, on the other hand, looks both guilty and hopeful, before his eyes fall to the folded hands in his lap. 

Instinctively, Dean wants to tighten up. But when he looks back at his mom’s smile, a little more of the edge in his heart crumbles. 

“She looks good there,” he says. He turns back to Jack and gives him a nod…and a reserved smile. The nephilim hesitates to return it, but when he does, it’s a genuine one. 

Dean moves on to the kitchen, where he pretends not to catch the way you’d been surreptitiously watching the scene from the kitchen. You duck your head and continue cutting some ham for the two plates you’ve set out on the counter.     

Dean’s face lights up when he finds the pies: pecan and apple. 

“Okay, you want mashed potatoes or macaroni with the ham?” you ask him. Dean raises a brow at you. You smile in amusement.

“What am I thinking? Both, obviously,” you say. 

“Obviously,” Dean quips with a nod. 

“Ah, well that’s interesting,” says Castiel. It stops both hunters in the kitchen with curious looks. 

“It seems you’re caught again,” the angel tells you, nodding up to the mistletoe poised above you and Dean. 

You roll your eyes, while Dean just smirks. You glance up at him with a question in your eyes. 

Should we tell them? you ask.

Dean’s smile grows. Hell, yeah.

He leans in to cup your cheek, and he kisses you soundly—something that shocks both angels…but not Sam. You close your eyes with a sound of contentment. You grab onto Dean’s shirt, holding him close.

“She didn’t kiss Sam that way,” Jack comments. 

Castiel recovers first, realizing what’s happened by Sam’s knowing look. 

“No,” Cas says in amusement. “I don’t believe she did.”

While Sam turns up the volume on the TV, giving you and Dean some privacy, Dean finally parts from you and tugs a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. 

“You know, I promised you a car by Christmas,” he says with a grin. “Technically speaking, I did come through on that deal.”

You raise a brow, though a smile tugs at your lips. “Hmm. I suppose you did.”

“And if I remember right, I get a…what was it?” He pretends to recall with a raised finger. “Oh, that’s right. A consequence-free request.” 

“Here we go.” You roll your eyes, but amusement and warmth still gleam them. “All right, Dean Winchester. What can I do for you?”

He hums and seems to consider it. He makes a show of it, really, tilting his head, looking down at you with a deepening smirk. You fight not to blush under his scrutiny, even as your smile grows. Your hands rest against his chest, while his slide around your waist and pull you in closer. 

“How about you don’t go running off so soon,” he says, thumbing at your cheek. “Stay through New Year’s, at least.”

You’d be lying if you said you aren’t shocked. You raise a brow. 

“That’s your request?”

Dean shrugs, but his quirking smile can’t hide the fondness in his eyes. It warms you in a way you also don’t expect.  

Taking your chin with gentle fingers, he presses a lingering kiss to your lips. Your eyes close as you once again take in this heady feeling. Being with him still doesn’t quite feel real, but you’re holding on for as long as you can. 

When he eventually pulls away, he smiles at your slightly hazy face.  

“I already got what I wanted,” Dean says. “Now we just…keep this good thing going.” 

You really do blush this time.

“Got what you wanted, huh?” you tease. He gives you a wry look.

“Not what I meant.” Then he smirks, squeezing your hips. “But actually yeah, that too.”

You laugh and swat at his shoulder. 

“Well, since I’m honor bound. I suppose I can stay a few more days,” you reply. “And I mean, your birthday’s not long after that.”

Dean hums in agreement. “We talkin’ early birthday present?”

You flash him a cheeky smile and slowly slide your hands down his arms. 

“Then Valentine’s Day’s is just around the corner,” you add. Dean nods sagely, trying to temper his smile.

“Might as well stay through February,” he says.

You grin. “Ooh! St. Patrick’s Day!” 

Dean laughs genuinely then, throwing his head back. You hold onto the edges of his button-down shirt and tug him back to you. 

“What I mean to say is, I could consider staying longer,” you say. However long you want me, your tone suggests. “…I’ll just need to tie up a few things.”  

You know your father will be just fine if you decide to move to Lebanon someday soon. He now has his new wife to keep him company, and there isn’t much else tying you to your hometown besides nostalgia, and bittersweet memories of your mom.  

“Is that a serious offer?” Dean asks.

You grin up at him playfully. “If you want it to be.”

He smiles and kisses you again. The way he holds you, looks at you, it’s tender enough to make your throat tighten with emotion. 

“I do,” Dean says. He stares down into your eyes. “It’s you, sweetheart. For me too. Just you.”

 Your smile is tremulous, but oh, so bright.

“Good.” 

AN: And that's it, folks! 🥹 Let me know what you thought of Part 3. I truly hope you enjoyed it!

Coming Up Next:

I have one other Christmas in July fic in store, over in The Boys fandom. Look out for "Love Actually" (Soldier Boy x Reader) next week!

It's set in the "Break Me Down" story-verse, but can be read as standalone. I will tag everyone who follows that ongoing story (which is almost finished!!).

Series Masterlist

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Tag List:

Comment below or send me an ask if you'd like to be tagged in this series!

@iprobablyshipit91 @katherineann83 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @agalliasi @venicesem @waters-2567 @deans-spinster-witch @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @mimaria420 @skyesthebomb @this-is-me19 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @emily-winchester @hobby27 @spnexploration @freewastelandstrawberry @stoneyggirl2 @satanicpixiedreamgirl @agothwithheavysetmakeup @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @melancholictearz @tipthejar @deans-baby-momma @nic-kolas @jacklesdeanvessel @beautyvaliant @mrshalverson2021 @ajjustice @leigh70 @violetlilysunshine @jackles010378 @ades106 @luvs4dria

[justwhisperingfantasies]

Memories Part 2

Characters: Dean Winchester x Female Reader, Sam Winchester, Castiel. Mick Davies. Mention of other SPN characters.

Warnings: memory wipe, language, angst, cute dean, fluff, not exactly cannon, implied smut, gun being pulled.

A/N: This is a continuation of my first-ever fic post. Please go easy on me. Hope you enjoy

Summary: You've had your memory wiped and sent off to your death. Sam, Dean, and Cas save you just before it is too late. the guys struggle with being strangers to you after all the years you have shared. You are forced into a life-altering dilemma.

Word count: 4,105 words

************************************************************************

Your stomach twisted. “Are you serious?” Why would I not want all my memories back? 

“Don't look at me like that. This life is hard. You could have a clean cut right now.” His face turned glum as he grabbed your hand and interlaced your fingers“ You've been through a lot of shit. No one would judge you if you did choose not to.” You heard his phone vibrating in his pocket. He took it out and answered. “Yeah. Alright. Give me a minute.” He tapped the phone and put it in his back pocket, not taking his eyes away from yours. 

You could see the extra wetness in his eyes, making another tear roll down your cheek. He wiped it away and pulled you into his arms, your arms automatically wrapped underneath his and around him. You laid your face against his chest. He kissed your forehead and said, “I’m sorry, sweetheart, just worry about getting cleaned up right now. Everything you need should still be in your bathroom. If not, your phone is on the nightstand on the right. Text me, and I'll make sure you get it. The food will probably be done right around the time you get out. Okay?” 

How can he do this with just a hug? It was so peaceful and safe in his arms. You never wanted to let go, but it had been a tough day and you needed a shower. (your fav food) didn't sound too bad, either. You nodded as you slowly pulled back your face. He took your face in his hands, wiping away more tears. “We will figure all this out later, okay?” he kissed your forehead again, and you felt a drop on your face. 

“Okay. I'm sorry” you manage to pull yourself together.

“Don't apologize. We will get it all figured out,” he said as he let his hands fall to his sides and you did the same.” Do you want me to stay here and wait?”

“No, it's ok. Thank you though. For everything.” you smiled 

“Anytime. Call or text if you need me.” he smiled back and then walked out the door closing it behind him.

You sit down on the bed as you try to collect your thoughts. How could you not get your memories back?! However, you did notice when Dean was describing everyone, it was in the past tense. It might be nice just to break away and have a normal life I guess. No monsters, no demons, no insane British people trying to wipe your mind. (y/n) have a nice hot shower get some food and think about this later. You told yourself. You got up and tried to shake it off. 

“Yes hot shower and some food,” you replied out loud to yourself. You walked into the bathroom and it was simple and nice. the same wood panel as the bedroom. White tile walls with black grout line. Decent size shower. The bathtub was probably bigger than most and a white porcelain sink with a black cabinet underneath. Big mirror above it with a black frame. You turned the shower knob all the way over to hot and waited for the water to warm.

************************************************************************

As Dean shut your door he leaned back on it and sighed. What the hell am I going to do if she doesn't want her memories back?! How could l live without her?! Just then his cell phone started vibrating again. “Yeah, I'm coming.” 

He walked back down To the library. 

“Well, it's about time chum?” Mick Davies was sitting at the first table across from Sam and Cas.

“Oh, I'm sorry I made you wait while I had to comfort my girlfriend that has had her memory wiped twice, almost killed, and kinda freaking out right now. I feel so bad for you.” Dean said raising his voice some. 

“Dean, I know. okay? That's why I called you.” Davies said with guilt in his eyes. “Did you find it?”

“Yes we did,” Sam said as he wheeled Over an older machine. Davies plunged it in and it turned in. 

It started beeping and lights started flickering. 

“Ah, she still works.” He said as he opened a small door below the device. “And there's more than enough of the serum to work. Where's the lovely lass?”

Dean's eyes narrowed “She's upstairs taking a shower.” 

Just then the kitchen buzzer went off. “Shit gotta get that,” Sam said as he hurried to the kitchen. 

“What are we havin'?” Davies asks

“ I don't know what you're having, but We are having (your fav food).” Dean still had an attitude. 

“Dean, let's go see if Sam needs any help.” It was obvious Castiel just wanted to talk to Dean in private. They walked over to the kitchen doorway. Dean looked back, keeping an eye on Mick. 

“ Dean, I don't like them either, but he did just risk his ass to save her. Maybe we should be more welcoming.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “ I'll feed him, but I'm not painting his toenails.” he went over to help Sam.

Cas then rolled His eyes and walked back to the library.

************************************************************************

That shower really hit the spot. You dried off and put your clothes on. You were brushing your hair when you started thinking about Dean. It's nuts how close you felt to him even though he was a stranger at the moment. Thinking over the tour you remember the our rooms thing you could have sworn he said our room. 

Your curiosity got the better of you and you opened the closet. There were women's clothes on the right and men's clothes on the left. You couldn't help yourself. You went to the nightstand on the left And opened the drawer. There was a lore book, a flashlight, a phone charger, a gun, a silver knife, and a box of condoms.  You went to the other nightstand and opened the drawer, you found a pair of glasses, a lore book, a silver knife, a gun, earbuds, hand sanitizer, with a phone sitting on top of the stand. You put on the glasses. Yep, this Was your side you thought as you put them back. You picked the phone up and swiped the screen. A picture of you and Dean showed on the screen. you two were standing By the car again in mid-laugh. It was super cute. You flinched when it started to vibrate. Dean's name came up with an adorable picture of him sleeping. You tapped the Green button. 

“Sup?” you said in a deep voice

“Really? Well, home dawg I was calling to see if you done because the food is ready.” Dean understood your banter so well. 

“Alright, I'm on my way.”

“Lov…’ the call ended.

“ God, I fuckng hate this!” Dean said as he shoved his phone back in his pocket.

“I know Dean.” Sam tried to comfort his brother as he carried the food over the table. “Just let her eat some food and then we can fix this..”

“Well if that's what she wants,” Dean said hoping you wouldn't want to forget him. He walked over to get the plates out.

“Wait what the hell are you talking about?” Sam Demanded

“ Think about it Sammy, she has been through so much pain. She could turn the other cheek and start living a normal life.” He set a plate for each of them on the table. 

“But dean?” 

“It's her choice and we will be happy for her either way!” 

“So you could just let her go?” Sam doubted as he put out everyone's silverware.

“If that's what she wants,” he argued. “Do you need anything else?

“No, that's all. Thanks.” Sam sighed “My money is on her choosing you.”

“GET BACK CASTIEL ITS ONE OF THEM!!” Sam and Dean heard you yell

They looked at each other and then ran for the library.

“(Y/N) PUT THE GUN DOWN!” you looked at Dean. “He is here to help. This is Mick, he's the one who called us and told us where you were. He can restore your memories with that thing.” he pointed at the machine. 

“Don't ya think someone should have mentioned to her I was coming?!” Mick shouted in fear.

“Where the hell did you get a gun?” Dean stormed over to you and held out his hand. You took a couple of steps back. Dean stayed where he was and bounced his hand a few times. 

You looked down at his hand. You still had the gun pointed at Mick. “Ha! not happening! Its mine. It was in my nightstand.” 

“I should have known,” Dean said as he shook his hand. “Come on. We aren't gonna let him hurt you.” he started to step closer.

You stepped back and pointed the gun at Dean. He stopped immediately “How do I know that?! How do I know this isn't a big trick?”

“Really (y/n)?” you could see the tears”s in his eyes. “You saw the pictures. You know I wouldn't let him hurt you.”

“Oh yeah? Then how did they take me the first time?” tears started streaming down your face. You felt so betrayed. You trusted these 3 men and they let one of them in here. You didn't know what to think. You were so confused and couldn't remember anything. Before you saw the British guy everything was fine. It's like he triggered something in you, something you couldn't control. You were angry, panicked, and overwhelmed.

Just then you felt Castiel behind you. He quickly put his fingers to your forehead and you passed out. Dean hurried to help Cas catch you, but he didn't need it. “I got her. I can go lay her in her bed?” Dean nodded as he took the gun out of your hand and put it in the back of his jeans. Castiel disappeared with you in his arms.

“Jesus fucking christ!” Mick said. “Seriously why didn't anyone explain the whole situation to her?!” 

Dean shook his head and hurried for the door.

He made it outside before the tears started falling. He leaned up against the Impala, then slowly slid down the side. What the fuck happened?! Was it just Mick being there? Was it a side effect of the mind-wiping? Did she really not believe he would everything in his power to make sure nobody hurt her? “Then how did they take me the first time?” her voice echoed in his head. It was his fault. If he was a little more cautious or a little less cocky maybe he wouldn't have gotten shot. Maybe she would be better off without him, living a normal life. She wouldn't have to run, wouldn't have to fight, she wouldn't have to hunt. He knew he should let you go. It felt like he couldn't breathe, couldn't move, his heart breaking in his chest as the tears fell. 

************************************************************************

Sam blinked and thought about going after Dean. But decided against it. He’ll want to be alone. So he walked into the kitchen to put the food in the fridge for later. He turned around as he closed the fridge finding Mick standing in the doorway.

“So was she freaked before she saw me?” Mick hesitantly asked.

‘No. She was fine. Even joking.” Sam sighed and then explained everything that he witnessed today. “I don't know what happened after she and Dean went upstairs. I don't know anything about the pictures”

“I'm guessing it was me.”

“No. I mean you probably made it worse, but she said the gun was in her nightstand. So she felt threatened enough to carry it downstairs before she even knew you were here.” 

“I have heard of the mind-wiping having a side effect, but I never seen it in myself.

“Is it temporary?.”

“I don't know. All I heard was side effects. Nothing specific. I'll start checking the inventory list for anything about mind wiping.” Mick didn't know what else to do.

“Hey Mick, If she is experiencing side effects would it even be safe to give her memories back?”

“I'm not sure mate.” he hung his head and walked out.

“Son of a bitch!’ Sam said as he threw one of the pots he had used in the sink.

************************************************************************

You awaken to Cas sitting in a chair beside your bed. You didn't say anything just stared at the ceiling of your room, playing back what just happened in your mind. You remembered everything that happened, everything you said, everything you did. But you could not remember what sent you into such a frenzy. You don't even remember being able to stop. The gun wasn't even loaded, but they didn't know that.

“(y/n)?” 

You shut your eyes and stayed silent.

“Come on (y/n). How are you feeling?” You rolled on your side putting your back toward him and you could feel the tears start. “Please don't ignore me.” he pleaded 

“Cas, I just can't right now okay?” you were so ashamed of what had just happened.

“Okay, But I'm gonna sit here until you can.”

“Why? I just acted like a fool and pulled a gun on innocent people. Why would you want to stay with me?” you started crying.

“Because I care about you. No matter what,” he said as he put his hand on your shoulder for comfort

*********************************************************************

He didn't know how long he had been sitting by the impala. Dean just sat there numb. His eyes were on fire, his head pounding. He needed to move, need to get this the fuck over with. He found the will to get up. It was so quiet in the bunk, peaceful chaos. 

“Dean?” Sam yelled from the library

“Yeah.” Dean's voice cracked. He cleared his throat as he walked into the library. “Whatcha doin'? Where is everyone?”

Sam looked up at his brother he could tell Dean had been crying, but he wouldn't dare say anything about it. “ (y/n) and Cas are still upstairs. Mick and I are reading up on mind wipe lore. He just went to the dungeon for something. He told me he had heard some things about it and you know how the men of letters were.” 

“They documented everything.”

“Exactly. So if we can find anything that can help, maybe there's a spell..’

“Sam.”

Sam continued his thought. “ Or if we can get rid of the side effects somehow.”

“Sam!”  Dean spoke a little louder. Sam stopped and looked at his brother.” I think I need to let her go.”

“Dean, but if we find something. Maybe getting her memories back will help..”

“Sam! Memories or no memories, I have to let her go. The British men of letters did this because of me. She almost got killed because of me. Look at all the shit she has been through because of me. Everything she has lost because of me. And it's just gonna keep happening. I have to do the right thing here. His eyes misted over again. God, they stung so bad, but it was nothing compared to the torment in his chest. he started to walk away.

“Dean, Come on…”

“ I don't wanna hear it Sammy!” he said with a raised voice and continued to walk away.

As he entered his old room he laid the gun on the table and then started to pace. The record player caught his eye. He walked over and put the needle on the record. He couldn't even remember what he had last listened to in here. Bad Medicine starts playing and the memories but his birthday from 2 years ago start rushing back.

(y/n) doing a sexy little strip tease, him holding her up against the wall, round 2 on the side table in the library that nobody ever used. He pushed the needle off making a screeching sound.  

He threw himself on his bed. “God I fucking hate this!”

************************************************************************

You must have cried yourself to sleep. You lay there a few minutes just taking in the quiet. You decide it's time. You roll over and see Castiel sitting in the same chair reading a book. “You're still here?” surprise in your voice.

He closed his book. “I told you I would stay until you are ready to talk.”

“What if I'm not ready yet?”

“Then I'll wait.”  

“Whatcha reading?”

“A journal of a former member of the men of letters.”

“Oh yeah? Anything good?”

“Well, he was one of the members that was experimenting with mind wiping”

“Interesting. Why are you reading it?”

“Because Mick told Sam that he had heard there are side effects of the mind wiping. So Mick, Sam, and I are reading into it.”

“So you guys think my psycho moment was from a side effect?”

“Maybe. I do have another theory.”

“Do tell.”

“You have been through a lot in the last 4 days. And yeah you were nervous after I explained everything to you, but any normal human probably would have had a meltdown way before you did. I do have one question though. You seemed ok with me, Sam, and Dean. Why bring the gun downstairs?”

“I found it on my nightstand. I took it down to clean. The damn thing was filthy. Then saw the British guy and I freaked. I can't explain it. It's like fight or fly kicked in and I chose to fight. And I couldn't stop. I have been questioning why I trust the 3 of you as much as I do. No offense. I heard the Brit and freaked out.”

“No offense taken. It would make total sense for you not to trust us. The British guy is Mick. He is the one who called us and told us where you were. And he ran away from the British Men Of Letters to come help us.”

“Do you think he’ll forgive me?”

“Mick? Well yeah, it's more our fault for not telling you he was coming. You were scared.”

You giggled and shook your head. “No. Dean. I pointed a gun at him and pretty much told him it was his fault I got kidnapped. Which is not what I think at all.”

“You were scared and pissed off, you said things you didn't mean. If anyone knows about that, it's Dean. You guys will be fine. We need to get you some food, I can hear your stomach growling from over here.” you gave him a look of dread. “I promise it will be alright. They've been through far worse. Come on.”

You sighed heavily and got up.

You got to Sam's room before you couldn't take the silence anymore. “So did you find anything good in the journal?”

“Interesting good yes, side effect good not yet.”

“But you don't think it was a side effect?”

“Well no, but if there are side effects, we want to know what they are.”

“But when Mick fixes me we won't have to worry about it anymore.”

“Actually, there's something I want to talk to you about.” he paused at the top of the stairs. “ (y/n) You have been through a great deal of pain in your lifetime. The hunting life isn't great. If you wanted..”

You started walking down the stairs “You don't have to give the clean break, no judgment speak. Dean beat you to it.”

“Oh well, I just wanted you to know all your options.”

“Got it Cas.” he looked like a child that just got yelled at. “I'm sorry I'm just hungry.”

His face lifted. “I know I can hear it.”

As you walk into the library you find Sam and Mick. Sam looks up and smiles at you.

Mick looks a bit weary. “Well, Ello Love. Are you armed?”

You give a slight eye roll. “No. I'm sorry..”

Mick cut you off. “No need for apologies. Not the first time a pretty dame pulled a gun on me.” he smiled.  You smiled back and your stomach growled louder than before.

Sam laughed “Hungry?”

“Starving!”

“Come on,” he said getting up.

“Sam I can…” he gave you a stern look “Keep you company while you make the food.”  you gave him a happy smile.

“What a great idea” he beamed sarcastically

You rolled your eyes and followed him. 

“I saved it. So all we have to do is reheat it. “

“Easy Enough.” you looked around. Dean was nowhere to be found, but you didn't want to come off needy so you didn't ask. 

He chuckled “ He is upstairs in his room.”

“Who?” you tried to play it off. 

“(y/n) “Sam said as you put the food in the oven

“Is he still mad at me?”

He turned around a look of surprise on his face. “He was never mad at you. He's worried about you. He blames himself for all the shit you've been through.”

You raised one eyebrow “ How the hell would any of this be his fault?!”

“Mind wipe right. Dean is a protector. If anything happens to anyone on his watch it's his fault. He's been like that as long as I can remember. Plus he thinks being with him is putting you in harm's way.”

“I’ll be right back.”

Sam laughed “This is the last time I'm making this.”

“I said I'll be right back.” you heard him laugh again as you walked out. 

************************************************************************

Cas waited until you and Sam were gone “Have you guys found anything?”

“Nothing yet, but we keep trying yea?”

“Yes! Are we sure she's experiencing side effects though?” 

“Honestly. I have my doubts. The way Sam explained it seemed like she trusted the 3 of you. He said she was even joking a bit, she only freaked out when she saw me. But if that's the case why did she have the gun before she knew I was here?”

They saw you marching your way through the library.

“Carry on Boys,” you said as you continued. Both looking at you in confusion. 

“Well, she looks mad. Should we be concerned?” Cas asked as they both starred after 

“No gun. She's fine.” Mick sniggered 

“Anyway. We did have a conversation about all that. She said she did trust us. She had been asking herself why all day. Said she didn't know she just did.” cas explained.” and she found the gun in her nightstand. Apparently, it was filthy. She brought it down to clean it.”

“Fucking hell. I doubt it was a side effect. She was probably frightened. Some British institute wipes your brain and sends you to your death, you wake up with strangers, and then one of the British cunts shows up here unannounced. I would probably pull a gun too.”

“I agree.”

************************************************************************

Come on. You can do this. You knocked on Dean’s door. 

“Go away Sam!” he yelled.

You rolled your eyes and pushed the door open. “It's not Sam.”

“Hey (y/n) you feeling any better?” 

“Well, I was until your brother told me that you are blaming yourself for this?! For everything?!”

“Fuckin Sam. It is my fault. You said so yourself.”

“Don't you curse Sam! He was just being honest. I know what I said. It was the heat of the moment. I really don't blame you and I do trust you. ”

“If you trust me so much, why did you have the gun in the first place?”

“I took the damn thing down to clean. It’s not even fucking loaded. I was just scared and I didn't want to go back. I'm sorry I pointed it at you.”

He got up and rushed over to the gun. No bullets. “You pointed an unloaded gun at us?”

“Like I just said I was freaking scared, no one else knew it wasn't loaded.”

He started laughing. 

“Did you really think I would shoot you?”

“In these circumstances? Absolutely.”

Just then his phone started ringing. He put it on speaker. “The food is getting cold again.”

“We’ll be right there Sammy.” he hung up the phone

“I'm not done”

He cocked his eyebrow with a grin. “Well go on then.”

“I'm a hunter with or without you. Judging from the pictures on the dresser and my phone I would rather it be with. You can't blame yourself. Sometimes bad shit happens and there's nothing you can do about it.”  you declared

“You Done?”

“Yes!”

He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you to him. His lips just inches away from yours. 

“Good! Now Let's go get some food.” he smiled.

[stusbunker]

Being friends with the man you've been secretly in love with is hard enough, but he also happens to be your boss. Meet Rockstar Dean, lead singer of Phantom Traveler, an international sensation with multiple platinum albums. As their publicist it's your job to maintain the band's image. But it's been a long year, after losing a founding member to Dean's temper and having to cancel the end of the last tour, you've got your work cut out for you.

What you sell to the record label is a new Dean: rejuvenated from months out of the spotlight, a new romance that hints he's ready to settle down all while still making amazing records. Now, you just need him to agree to it.

Warnings, etc: Slow burn, jealousy, assumed unrequited feelings, mutual pining, mild drug use, smut, lots of baggage with these two, Dean/Bela, past Dean/Jo, guilt, lack of self esteem, finding yourself before you can be ready to love someone else, with more specifics per chapter.

Chapter 1: Intro

Chapter 2: Measure

Chapter 3: Rest

Chapter 4: Bravura

Chapter 5: Fermata

Chapter 6: A Due

Chapter 7: Lontano

Chapter 8: Lilt

Chapter 9: Giocoso

Chapter 10: Cuivré

Chapter 11: Eco

Chapter 12: Hook

Chapter 13: Canto

Chapter 14: Pomposo

Chapter 15: Rubato

Chapter 16: Schleppen

Chapter 17: Trill

Chapter 18: Mordent

Chapter 19: Pizzicato

Chapter 20: Arpeggio

Chapter 21: Dolce

Chapter 22: En Cédant

Chapter 23: Furia

Chapter 24: Espansivo

Chapter 25: Vivace

Chapter 26: Polyphony

Chapter 27: Molto

Chapter 28: Guerriero

Chapter 29: Obbligato

Chapter 30: Larghetto

Chapter 31: Ziehen

Chapter 32: Tronco

Chapter 33: Stornello

Chapter 34: Animato

Chapter 35: Cambiare

Chapter 36: Acciaccato

Chapter 37: Portato

Chapter 38: Patetico

Chapter 39: Lusingando

Chapter 40: Col Legno

Chapter 41: Emporte

Chapter 42: Tutti

Chapter 43: Soutenu

Chapter 44: Unisono

Spotify playlist

Read on AO3