#death of peace of mind

[core-bands]

Bad Omens - Just Pretend.

[stray-cat-with-internet-access]

Long haired Noah Sebastian

[spicywhenspeaking]

THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND : BAD OMENS

[juvenillia]

~ Death of Peace of Mind ~ 15: teasing

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x fem!reader

photo credits go to very talented @ave661

a/n: maybe I got a bit too carried away in this one but yeah, let me know what you think

CW/TW: mentions of loss, violence, jealousy, dubcon, touch/assault, use of petnames, guilt, regret

wordcount: 4.3k

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"So, you're doing it?", the female voice rang through the speaker. "It's a mission, of course I'm doing it.", your voice was determined but still a bit shaky. Maybe you were just too exhausted. The sleepless nights sapping on your energy. "We know it's a special operation, so we at least want you to choose your partner yourself.", Price’s voice was soft but still firm. "I'd recommend Riley." Laswell's words instantly let your stomach take a turn. You couldn't choose him for too many reasons. So many you totally wouldn't share with your literal boss. Still Laswell continued. "He would act on it with the most professional interests." - "But the mask." - "Even better. Nobody knows who he actually looks like and if it's an order he wouldn't even hesitate." You felt like throwing up. Price looked concerned at you but tried to keep his face clear.

"No, no way. I respect his boundaries. I'm going with MacTavish.", you answered bluntly and quick before the discussion could go anymore in a direction you didn't want to. "You sure about that?", Price’s voice was a bit surprised, but the situation was a special occasion. Such operations were never easy and never a thing because the 141 handled such situations differently. They had their own ways to get the insider information that was required. Mostly this way was harsh and bone crushing. But now they had an ace up their sleeve. They had you on the team, a woman. And therefore, a really beautiful one. That opened a new door of possibilities. "Alright. So, Sergeant MacTavish it is. I'll arrange everything." The line went dead, and you looked at Price. "You know how this op will go." - "I'm familiar with that kinda thing. Yeah. Gonna talk with him tomorrow." - "Thank you, Skadi." - "No need to thank me, sir. It's my job." Price knew that those missions were nerve-wracking for everyone included, and he swore to himself, that he would only sent you out on it if you were fine with it. "You know what I mean.", he simply added before following you to the common room to be reunited with the rest of the 141.

That was yesterday, and now you found yourself in the shared office, figuring the best way out to tell Johnny about his luck. Your mind was racing. Once for the situation that you again fell asleep in the common room and got carried back to your room by one of the boys. How Beth explained later it was Simon, again. Only the thought of the situation let your stomach ramble. No, we won't call it butterflies, we just don't. For the second reason it was definitely the whole situation you found yourself in. You didn't mind the operation itself nor the fact that Johnny was to be by your side. It was just the fact that you were never the type to enjoy social gatherings that much, especially such big and fancy ones. You hated it back then, the hand shaking, sweet talking and complimenting just to get approval and support from rich people which thought of themselves way too much. Back then you played already a role, but this time would be different and more difficult. Pretending to be a completely different person with a completely other life plus of course your beloved boyfriend, Johnny had to pretend to be. Invading enemy terrain to get intel in nothing more than a fancy dress which would reveal way too much skin. No gun in your hands, no knives strapped to your body. You would be served to them on a silver plate. Those missions were triggering your anxiety more than infiltrating an enemy base the offensive way.

"Slept well?", a deep teasing voice ripped you out of the haze your thoughts were. You blinked utterly confused at the Lieutenant who just placed a cup in front of you. Hot steam leaving it in dancing movements upwards till they vanished. You could see how his mask moved, and how he had to wear a smile beneath it. A deep blush made its way onto your cheeks. Since when was he so cocky with his comments? What did change in the last days? And worse did you do something embarrassing? Hells bells, did you speak during your sleep?

He let out a nearly inaudible chuckle while taking his place at his desk across from yours. Your reaction was enough answer for him, still he wanted to push it. It was only the two of you in the office by now, so he would take advantage of it. "Will ya keep fallin' asleep 'n me? Just out 'f curiosity." His voice was so cocky, so teasing. You wanted the ground to open and swallow you right now.

After Simon's anger about the intruder vanished, he saw a chance of being just a bit more offensive with you. Only jokingly teasing, only the way like you would do with Johnny or Kyle all the time. It wouldn’t change a thing he believed. He wanted to test the waters but seeing you all flustered and overwhelmed did something to him. And maybe there was a chance that you would call him 'darling', just the way you did with him. He didn't know how he would react; he didn't know what it would take you to grow this comfortable around Simon, but he would try to find out. Maybe it would be his doom, but maybe his elysium.

This was the moment Johnny walked through the door. "Good morning everyo..." - "MacTavish, just the guy I was looking for.", you yelled out and before he could react, you jumped up from your place, took the cup of tea Simon brought you in one hand and the other hand grabbed Johnny's wrist while dragging him outside. Shoving Kyle aside while he tried to enter the office and just looked dumbfounded after you two and then at Simon. The taller Brit just shrugged, usually the situation would kind of bug him, but right now, he was too satisfied with your morning encounter and started on the reports. A victorious smile well hidden behind the mask.

"So, yer gonna be my wifey, eh?", Johnny looked with raised brows at you, wearing a cocky smile. You dragged him into one of the empty briefing rooms where you explained everything to him. "Fiancée. And stop the teasing. Bloody hell.", you rolled your eyes while he nudged your foot with his. He stood in front of you, not too far away but also not really close, leaning against one of the tables. "Fiancée.", he repeated mockingly.

"We should talk about boundaries. Lines we shouldn’t cross, things we're fine with and things we're not.", you stated while crossing your arms in front of your chest. Johnny nodded, and suddenly some thoughts flashed his mind. Thoughts he pushed aside for now. Of course, Johnny knew how important that mission was, but he still was a teasing piece of shit. It took you a few to sort things out and to get him to take this talk serious, without any more teasing and jokes. You were professionals after all.

"That's only the emergency exit. Ya hear me?", you looked serious at him while taking the last few sips out of the cup and ending your talk. You did really go through any possibility that could happen. "Got it. And now we're talking about Lt making you, and only you, tea and why you didn't choose him for the fake dating mission. Eh?", he raised his brows once more at you, this cocky grin back at his lips. You felt the heat back on your cheeks and wished you could just throw the cup after him. Instead, you rolled your eyes and raised your hands in a warning gesture. "Already thinking about divorce now.", you laughed, and Johnny pouted jokingly before each of you went after the preparation for this special operation.

It was around six in the evening as Laswell helped you with your hair and makeup. She told you, that she always had to doll up her wife and you had to admit, she did an amazing job. You were standing in the bathroom of the fancy hotel just some blocks away from the benefits gala. Putting the jewelry and dress on, Kate had prepared for you. The jewelry was made to be your decent communication device for the night. It would keep you in contact with Price and Ghost who were arranged as guards for the gala. So, Johnny and you wouldn't be completely out in the open.

You slipped the dress on and cursed to yourself. It was tight just at the right places and hugged your curves perfect. It hadn't a huge cleavage, but a slit up to your leg, nearly too high for your liking. Somehow you were still glad that this fabric was divided there because otherwise you weren't even able to move properly. The silky fabric moved delightful as you took a turn in front of the mirror. It definitely wasn't something you despised wearing, you felt pretty of course, but you'd preferred your cargo pants and a turtleneck. You could say you felt too much like eye candy, but that was what you were supposed to be today. A decoy to attract the hopefully right persons to spill some intel.

You went with Kate to the room the boys were put to. Kyle was already on the computers to invade the security cameras, that you could be a step ahead. Just in case. Ghost seated next to him, wearing an all-black suit with a pair of unholy tight pants, and a completely black balaclava. Going through the process over and over again. Price was in the same suit, helping Johnny to adjust his bow tie. He wore a casual and elegant suit, that matched the color of your dress. Simon was the one to open the door for you and Kate as soon as she knocked and how happy he was to wear this god damn mask.

His breath hitched as soon as he laid his eyes on your figure. You just walked past him, trying to ignore the burning feeling inside of you. Your work brain needed to take over now. Kyle only whistled, looking astonished in your direction. You rolled your eyes while pushing your hands in your hips. "Zip it, Garrick!", you glared at him, and he only rose his hands in defense. "If yer saying something against my wifey I'm gonna end yer.", Soap said while slipping a hand around your shoulder. Maybe Johnny was already a bit to comfortable in his role.

Simon stood still in place, frozen, mesmerized by your presence. The only thing that brought him back was Johnny's hand on your shoulder. The shoulder that was stained with a fresh scar of your latest meeting with a bullet and guilt came up his chest. His eyes travelled down to your hips, the place where another nasty scar would stay forever now. Scars were part of the job, nothing special but thinking about how your beautiful body was stained with them.

Just then he realized how perfectly fitted the dress was. Literally nothings were left to the imagination, his imagination. His eyes lingered just there, hoping that his brain would be able to remind him of this picture as often as possible. He’d love to change the picture of your blood-stained body into this one. And he made sure to be as close to your side tonight as possible. "Fiancée. Johnny. Fiancée.", you corrected him annoyed. "Why is that even so important?" - "We need a good story with enough personal information to spill. Because only then people will spare theirs. We have to be convincing." Johnny playfully rolled his eyes at your correction. "Alright ladies. We must go!", Laswell clapped in her hands and Price pulled an identical balaclava, like Simon already wore, over his head.

The start of the evening went off smoother than expected. Johnny didn't leave your side, always having an arm around your waist or on your back. It was quite reassuring, and his constant presence made it easier for you to entertain the people. Johnny did most of the talking and you just had to look pretty. That wasn't hard at all. Plus, you always felt save feeling the intense glance of Ghost on you. No matter where you were, you knew he was close. Sometimes you couldn't even see him, like a real ghost hiding in the shadows. You wore an earpiece on the side that was covered by your hair. So that you could at least got some hints from the boys. No matter if it was from Kyle observing the whole place or your two guards. And it was somehow funny that wherever you looked all the waitresses and securities wore those masks. Of course, you were a bit disappointed when you found out that he gonna keep the mask on even now, still you didn't want to cross his boundaries, that’s why you didn’t choose him for the mission and that is the reason you told Johnny. From time to time, you heard Price's or Gaz' voice over the earpiece, commenting on stuff people said. Simon stayed silence most of the time. Johnny had no earpiece, because he simply had nothing that could hide it, so he had to promise to stay close. At least in the sight of Price.

It was in a moment when Soap and you weren't surrounded by anyone, just then you caught him. Simon standing afar, next to a pillar and staring continuously at you. But something in his glance was different. Was it a hint of jealousy? Your eyes met for a second before a genuine smile flashed over your face. Johnny stood close to you, still an arm around you his eyes searching for your next victim, and you couldn't prevent the words to slip over your lips. "Lieutenant.", you said calm averting your gaze to not make it too obvious. Leaning a bit further into your fake fiancé. He hummed in confirmation over the comms. Still staring at you, not daring to look away. Too scared that it would be a dream and the image in front of him would be gone as soon as he blinked. "You’re staring.", you said with the most teasing voice you could and just then you could see from the corner of your eyes that he abruptly looked away. "Just observing.", he cleared his throat. It led to a sweet and satisfied laugh. The game he started could be played by two.

"Says the lass that shamelessly checked his arse in those tight suit pants out.", Johnny's cocky voice was heard, and you instantly buried your face deeper in his shoulder. You hoped that nobody at the other end of the comms could hear him. He started to laugh and patted your back. "Yer secret's save with me. Dinnea yer worry, bonnie.", he smiled while your face was drowning in embarrassment and you just prayed to everything you hold dear, that Johnny would keep his promise.

The evening became a bit harder when you decided to split up, to get as many people to talk to you as possible. It was after an unpleasant talk with a way too drunken man, that you took a little break excusing yourself to the bathroom. He at least gave a few things away that could help you. Still, you felt a disgusting shadow creeping over your skin. Men were easy to manipulate, still you hated it. You just hoped the night would be over soon and that you could wash yourself clean with a cold shower.

As soon as you stepped out of the bathroom you couldn't help but felt another shiver run down your spine. Another guy seemed to have followed you, because just then you felt an unfamiliar hand creeping around your waist. You immediately tensed and needed to fight the urge to throw him over your shoulder. He lowered his head to your ear that wasn’t covered by your hair. "There is someone who wants to meet you, doll." It made your hair stand to an end, but you needed to suppress it. Whoever wanted to see you could be a very helpful informant. You were lucky that he couldn’t see your face that was coated in sheer disgust. He let his hand wander further down, and the feeling to just break his wrist became stronger and stronger.

But you weren't the only one that had this urge, just to the misery of the poor guy. Ghost snatched his shoulder and yanked him with full force away from you. He nearly growled at him before standing in front of you. Shielding you away. "Leave 'e lady alone. She's already expected.", he hissed through gritted teeth and the douchebag ran away as fast as possible.

You looked in disbelief at him as he turned around to face you properly. Making sure nobody else would watch, you glared at him. "What the hell?! He could have led to important information.", you crossed your arms. "That wasn't appropriate. I needed to intervene!", he only hissed, trying to keep his voice as low as possible. He would never raise his voice at you, still he needed to clarify his point. "I was completely okay... that's how those things work. It's the most efficient way.", you paused for a moment. You didn't want to scold him for something that would be the right thing to do, because indeed it wasn't okay how the man treated you. Still, he interrupted a chance of good information.

"You really need to let myself decide if I'm fine or not." Simon clenched his fist. He knew you were right, but watching how that guy touched you without your consent, without your approval that made him furious. Seeing the discomfort in your eyes. He wouldn't let anything like this happen, to no-one, but especially not to you. You could feel how tense he was; he didn't answer to your outburst. You sighed; one more look around before your arms dropped to your side. "You trust me?", your eyes searched for his and he nodded slowly, not averting his glance. "Let's agree on a sign.", you exhaled not braking eye contact either.

You went back in the main hall, still the burning gaze from Ghost on your back, you moved through the groups of people until you caught a word that completely caught your interest. "He changed since the incident." - "Well, Camilo was his brother." You took a place in the circle, greeting everyone with a sweet smile. Camilo had a brother. "He was his twin! You know how twins have this weird connection..." A twin, that made sense why you thought you saw Camilo running around that chem factory. Price and Simon assured you millions of times that Ghost took him out before he caught that bullet.

People started starring at you, so you took a sip out of the glass in your hand. "I heard from the tragic accident.", you chimed with fake sympathy. "Oh, my dear. That wasn't an accident.", an older man touched your shoulder and left his hand there. Squeezing it softly. "He was taking care of.", you looked faked bewildered at him. And another woman joined. "He even moved the plans back, you know, to grief properly. Even gave him a funeral after finding his body. So, he has a heart after all." You nodded in understanding. Just then you heard a static voice over the comms "We got visitors.", Price announced and soon you could sense a different group of armed men entering over the higher up floor. They also wore balaclavas, but they moved differently.

You looked with a worried face around, searching for Johnny. That's when the hand of the older man started rubbing circles on your shoulder. "Don't worry my dear. They're here to protect us. I believe there is an uninvited guest." He looked at you with those lust blown pupils and it made you sick. If he would call you 'my dear' one more time you needed to throw up. "Those uninvited guests are you. Maybe we should leave.", Kyle's voice rang over the earpiece while he tracked every enemy. "Those Italians are always so impudent, but family is their highest good."-"Aren't they Mexicans?" - "Mexicans, Italians, Brazilians, Spanish. Aren't they all the same?!", the old men next to you chimed and all around started to laugh. You forced a laugh out of your throat as you saw another bunch of armed and masked men approaching the lower level. Your eyes searched for Soap. Kyle was right, you had to leave now. "Excuse me. I'm missing my beloved fiancé. Will be back soon.", you stated before moving through the mass of people. Johnny didn't hear anything the boys said due to the missing earpiece. You needed to find him.

It was Price’s voice that helped. "He's at the west entry. Gonna make sure you leave save. Ghost take care of the car." You moved as fast as possible without drawing any suspicion to the place Price described and Johnny was there. Discussing eagerly with no one else then the man from your hallway encounter with Ghost. That wouldn't end good.

"Darling, I'm feeling unwell. You think we can go back to the hotel.", you chimed with a cooing tone while your hands searched his. He looked at you and gladly understood immediately. The man looked surprised at you and insisted of you staying a little while longer. Somehow you made your way to the hallway, the only thing that separated you and the SUV that brought you out of here. Price made sure the way was clear and Ghost sat in the car, engine already rumbling low waiting for you to enter the vehicle.

"He's still following you and it seems like he got friends", Kyle declared over the comms. "Shit.", you hissed out while walking in those fancy heels. "We aroused suspicion, especially with our sudden leave.", Johnny said while trailing close behind. A thousand thoughts were rushing through your mind. There was only thing that might help, you sighed. Your eyes found a little corner, and you turned, taking Johnny's wrist, dragging him with you around.

"Yo, Skadi, wrong direction.", you could hear Kyle over the comms. "Emergency exit.", is all you said before muting the earpiece and Johnny immediately understood. That was the first moment he felt uneasy tonight. You pressed yourself against the wall, wrapped your hands around Johnny's neck while bringing him closer to you. His face just a breath away from yours. You looked in his eyes and he nodded, giving silently permission and you closed the gap between you. Your lips brushing over his, a bit stern but still eager, the intense feeling couldn't be denied. His hands were frozen on your waist, till you took one of them and placed it over your thigh. The leg hooking behind his body drawing him impossible closer. It needed to be a good show for them to buy it. Johnny's grip on your bare skin was tight, as his lips moved over yours. It felt nothing like you remembered a kiss, but that wasn't even one of those lust filled actions. It was your emergency exit.

"Bloody hell.", Kyle breathed out in utterly shock, staring at the screen in front of him. "What's happening?!", Ghost nearly barked through the earpiece while the grip around the steering wheel tightened. "Even when I told you, you wouldn't believe me.", Kyle chuckled not daring to blink. Ghost stayed silent, but his heart was pounding.

The man went around the corner and abruptly stopped as soon as he saw the image in front of him. Every suspicion leaving him, as he felt uneasy to watch. To your luck, he had some respect for the privacy and intimacy you just shared. Well, that's at least what you thought. That was the second time tonight he should feel a misfortune. But you couldn’t care. He left you alone and that was all that mattered.

Johnny and you broke away and he looked weird down at you. Somehow his face was full of concern, and regret and at the same time his cheeks burned, and he smiled oddly.  “Keep it steady.”, you punched his chest while turning the earpiece on again and rolling your eyes at the Scot. "Just bought us some time. Sorry. On the way out now.", you said while walking back where you left your path. "Dinnea believe that this actually worked.", Johnny hissed a bit breathless next to you and you could hear Kyle joining with a "Same, you lucky bastard." You just rolled your eyes once more as you climbed into the back seat of the car next to Johnny while Ghost already navigated it to the hotel. You couldn't look at Johnny, so you simply stared out of the window. Johnny just stared into the distance in front of him. You agreed on it, you both did and still it left you in an awkward state of mind.

Simon's eyes trailed to the driving mirror, observant as always, he immediately noticed the stains of the red shade on Johnny's lips. His grip around the steering wheel tightened, letting his knuckles turn white when he had to force his eyes back onto the road.

"Good work!", Price said once more as he pulled off the mask, but all of you in the car stayed silent.

taglist: open just lmk

@yyiikes @saffronimagines @originaldeerhottub @illuminwtesz @killergoddess97 @kaelaiscool @spiritndrain @anothersimpsblog

[sashred]

Kind of a lurker on the Bad Omens tags, but thought I’d share some goodies since I got a pretty damn good spot tonight at the Atlanta show😚 All pics by me, please don’t use without crediting 😉

[photosbynathalie]

visuals from bad omens live in offenbach taken by me

for more:

[loser90sblog]

Noah Sebastian

Taken on android by mmmee

[lollipop10090]

Best concert ever🖤🖤🖤

[naroence]

Ya’ll i took so many pics at Bad Omens last night it’s unhealhy but it was so worth it.

[lifewaster-imdanger98]

"Love's the death of peace of mind"

Bad Omens ~ death of peace of mind

Alright Tumblr, you were right. Bad Omens is indeed a fantastic band. I give up. I can no longer deny it. You win.

[core-bands]

Bad Omens — Just Pretend.

[tylerkateporter]

noah🫣🖤

[99dreamcatcher]

My vinyls came in over the weekend and i have had them on a nonstop loop since. The unplugged version on vinyl is just ahdkaldjahakdsah! i swear to god noah has to be some sort of siren. Who gave this man the right to have a voice that hauntingly beautiful!?

[juvenillia]

~ Death of Peace of Mind ~ 20: cold

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x fem!reader

photo credits go to very talented @ave661

a/n: yes this chapter is highly inspired by this render by the amazing @ave661 and yes this chapter is this old, but hey we're finally getting somewhere. Enjoy while it lasts

CW/TW: fluff, longing, teasing, mentions of angst, trauma, nightmares

wordcount: 4.2k

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The mission was bone crushing. Not in the way that you wouldn't make it out alive, but by the temperatures you were surrounded, sitting in the tiniest places to observe a warehouse with only the little voices in your head was claiming its toll. Both mentally and physically. Between the little times you'd come back to the safehouse, writing, and encoding the gathered intel for Laswell you could finally calm down a bit. Throwing the layers of clothing that were soaked with the bitterness of freezing Bulgaria into the corners, making you a hot instant coffee that tasted like liquid death and hoping that you somehow could warm up your sore limbs. But you weren't able to. It was the second week in the mountains and the cold started to crawl into your muscles. Every day it got a bit harder to go out again. You just craved some real warmth. A comforting feeling provided by someone.

In this situation you wished you had never given that hoodie back to him in the first place. Those calm moments during the lonely shifts. Sitting in the corner in front of the little electronical heater, the only thing that prevented you from freezing to death. You made a mental note, to ask Kate for a hotel with a bathtub before heading back to the base. Just a way to get the cold out of your body. You would literally commit a war crime to have a good hot bath and a well-made tea right now. You pulled the silvern zippo out of your pocket and ignited it. The flame started to dance, and you stared into it. It invited your mind to shut down for just a little while. Your free hand moving carefully over it. This little flame provided you with much more comfort than the entire safehouse. A little smile crawled up to your already pale blueish lips.

The 141 gave you a place you wanted to return to. But Simon provided you with a longing for that spot on the couch in the common room. A longing for a shared fag. A craving to be close to him again. You closed your eyes for a few seconds. Letting yourself wonder if they were alright. If their missions were better than yours or if they even would be back at the base already. You wanted so bad to just pull your phone out and call them, him. Hear his voice again, but it wasn't possible. But the sheer thought of reunion kept you pushing forward. It made you become a bit needy and selfish but how couldn't you?

The way he let all your problems wash away, the way he provided you with something you had lost and somehow never called yours anyways. And if he would let you, even if it was just a moment to rest your head on his brawn shoulder while falling asleep surrounded by everyone again, you would take it and cherish it. You would gladly accept everything he would provide you with and if you needed to hear every bad dad joke on this earth, you would gladly listen. You wanted to know the man behind the mask, and you started to learn, that he was the person you wanted in your life. Both, Simon and Ghost. Maybe it was your savior complex, maybe it was pure affection or just simple attraction. But as soon as you looked into his eyes the world seemed a better place.

König was right, your own eyes did betray you but for once in your life you shouldn't care about how frightened you were. You knew long time ago how Simon made you feel, and it wasn't about the hormones in your body. It was your heart screaming to be heard. Still, you were able to ignore it for the longest time, but with every day out in the plain greyness, alone with your thoughts it pushed you further into a corner. The loneliness forced you to listen and what it told you wasn't shocking nor surprising. You had fallen for him. Since the evening when he told you his name. Since this day he became irreversible your missing piece, and with every day further the spot this piece occupied grew, and it rather will be your redemption or your doom. But you wouldn't care, you would take it anyhow it'd come your way. You had been a fool for lesser things, so why shouldn't you risk something for once in your life, that might make your life more worth of living.

The mission took a few more days longer. A few more days walking and climbing through the air vents to observe and infiltrate the sewage system. Satisfied with your job you sat in a helicopter that brought you home. Unfortunately, Kate had to deny your wish about the hotel, but you didn't care. You were able to leave this place and hopefully be reunited with your team again. Soap was the first to welcome you again, he was outside of the base literally sprinting towards you as he took sight of you. "Yer back! Woah, ye look like ye've seen a ghost," he chuckled at the well-intended pun, but his smile faltered as he saw your pale face. Your lips tugged upwards weakly smiling at him.

 "Just cold and tired," you stated while giving him a quick hug. His hands lingered on your shoulders after you pulled away. Since the fake dating mission, he was way more touchy-feely with you, but you didn't mind.  

"Laswell is in Price’s office. As soon as yer ready ye can debrief. Maybe a hot shower beforehand?" He squeezed your shoulder slightly and you nodded.

"I'd die for a good tea," you mumbled, eyes staring in the distant.

"Yer Brits eh. I can try to make ye some, bonnie." He smiled sincere. A smile you’ve seen so many times on his face when he wasn’t teasing. Your brows narrowed at his statement. That's when Johnny's features faltered just a bit, his eyes remind bright though. "Gaz and the Captain are already gone again, and Lt isn't even back yet." Your mouth formed a little 'oh'. "Unfortunately, yer gonna take ma company till then." He chuckled while helping with your bag and heading in with you together.

The hot water ran over your bare skin but unfortunately it merely had a painful effect than melting your frozen limbs. With some fresh clothes and still damp hair you went right to Price's office to report everything to Laswell and then went to your shared office again. You sat over your reports and sipped on the tea Johnny had prepared. It wasn't as awful as the instant coffee you drank the last weeks, but it definitely didn't deserve to be called tea. Still, you didn't want to hurt his feelings and drank it. With a little side note to maybe show him how to properly make tea. Nevertheless, the hot beverage - as stated before you couldn't call it tea - helped filling you with a slight warmth.

After some time when you felt a familiar sensation pricking at the corner of your eyes, you decided to take a little break. You looked over your desk and suddenly realized how empty it was. Your eyes trailed over to Kyle's and Johnny's. Decorated with some pictures of family, some medals, and even something that seemed like collectibles. You opened the first drawer of your table and found a little paper box. Opening it, it revealed some pictures you always had near you but never managed to actually put them on display. You needed to change that, so you ordered a few frames to be able to put them on your desk. It was nothing you needed to keep secret, nothing to hide from them anymore. When your eyes moved to your front view, you were met with a plain table, just like yours. But your eyes caught something way more interesting. A piece of grey fabric, lingering over the back of his chair. A piece you were way too familiar with. Did he forget to put it away? Impossible, he wore it the evening when you all had to head out. He had to get changed, he had to come here to drop it off. Your lips tugged upwards into a sweet smile. He had to leave it here on purpose. He wouldn't mind, would he? You pulled of the fitting sweater you wore and exchanged it shamelessly with his hoodie. It filled your nostrils with such a comforting scent and immediately some of the coldness left your body. You pulled the neckline over your nose to be able to inhale his smell even more. Letting go, pulling the hood over your head you moved back to work on the reports. You could already see the smug grin on Johnny's face and hear his teasing comments, but you didn't care. This simple piece of fabric finally could provide you with the craved comfort.

It took some more days for Price and Kyle to return, Simon was still vanished. Meanwhile Soap was sent out again, and you were assigned to help with mapping everything out and linking it together. Sometimes König dropped by, accompanying you when he had nothing else to do. He couldn't suppress the teasing comments just like Johnny. Why didn’t they get along? You couldn't understand, for real. You spent the time with König alone to also fulfill another little mission Price gave you some time ago, which still gave you kind of anxiety, but you did understand to well. Price wanted to make sure, and so did you.

 As Soap came back, he had new coordinates and outlines with him. They sent out drones and worked with GPS to track whatever passed through the sewage system. You now had the task to link the routes and compare it to anything suspicious from your already gathered knowledge. It was quite a hard task, by now you had so many small fragments of information, tons of different locations and just a few faces, but you could do it.

"Bonnie..." A concerned but soft voice reached out to you, followed by a hand on your shoulder as you sat on the floor to have more space for the huge map you tried to mark everything on. You looked up at him. "Head to bed. Tomorrow is another day." It was the third day you spent nonstop in the office trying to complete the map outlines.

"Just one more..." A weak smile on your lips and he nodded with a defeated sigh.

"Aye. Can’t convince yer anyways. " He patted your shoulder before leaving for his room. One hour became another, and another. You weren't even aware that you fell asleep here. Your back leaned against Kyle's desk, knees tugged to your chest and head resting on it. It wasn't comfortable, it wasn't cozy, but your body forced you to rest.

Meanwhile, it was Simon who finally sat a foot back on base. He was exhausted from the events of the past weeks. Solo ops were always different, difficult for his mind. Sure, he had a mission to accomplish but, in the end, there were no one distracting him from his own thoughts. Especially during the times, he was alone in the safehouse. He was used to being alone with himself. Mind wandering around everything what needed to be done. What have been done but now, it was different now. His brain was altered by you, and in those little moments, his thoughts circled around anything but the mission. It got even harder when his nights became shorter, and the nerve-wrecking nightmares became stronger. He often unfolded the little paper he found in his vest, and always found himself with a little smile when he put it back again.

A deep exhale of pure relief left his throat as some familiar faces greeted him. It was quite early and the routines of the other soldiers around the base already bringing back a feeling of good old habits. His feet dragged him to Price’s office first, announcing his return and debriefing just really quick. Not even bothering to go back to his room he found himself in the common room. A place that somehow became much cozier than he remembered. His eyes found Johnny in the little kitchen corner, fumbling with the can of your favorite tea. “What the ‘ell are ya tryin’ Sarge?” He threw his duffel bag onto the couch together with his vest, and got closer to the Scot, who nearly threw the can and the spoon in the air.

“Dia-diag!” [god damn] He breathed out before a small smile tugged at his lips. Simon arched his brow at him while he looked at the scenery. “Yer back, Lt. Good to see yer.” He smiled while pushing the can and the spoon into his chest before moving aside. “I wanted to make her some tea, but now yer back, sooo yer assigned with that job again. Aye?” His smile teasing as always, arms crossed in front of his chest.

Simon didn’t even question it further and only shook his head in amusement before preparing the tea like he knew you loved it. “‘s she good?” he said absently while stirring in the cup.

“Lass will be much better now,” Johnny said while taking the cup of coffee he prepared for himself, a smug grin on his face while his feet started to carry him to the shared office. Knowing that you’d be already back there working. Simon trailed after him, the cup filled with an actual well-made tea in his hand, and a smile of anticipation on his lips beneath the mask.

The sight in front of both men just let Johnny deeply exhale. “Told her to go to bed….” He wanted to wake you up, but Simon stopped him. Pushing the cup in the other one’s hand while his feet dragged him towards you. His heart ached at the view. Your figure all curled up, in his hoodie on the floor. He carefully crouched down in front of you. His gloved hand finding your shoulder and squeezing it just so slightly. It earned him a sweet puff out of your mouth before your hand started to rub your eyes.

“Johnny… if I hear only one…” You slowly looked up and had to blink a few times, when you realized it wasn’t the Scot waking you up. Simon responded with a nearly inaudible chuckle. The familiar skull face in front of you made you rub your eyes once more before your body reacted completely on its own.

From your earlier position nearly leaping on your knees and your arms just flew around his statue, while you buried your face into the crook of his neck. Just as you realized what you so randomly did, you wanted to pull away. Your brain still so sleepy, but you needed to apologize for the misbehavior. Just then, he wrapped his brawn arms around your lower body and pulled you even closer. His huge hands squeezed around your waist as he held you close, and you sunk even more into him. One of his hands wandered from your waist to your nape, keeping you firm against him. Nothing could stop your heart from pounding against your chest, but the cold finally seemed to get out of your system. “You’re back,” you cooed so silently, while you inhaled his delicious scent, mixed with dry dust, and sweat. He hummed in approval, while he couldn’t resist to do just the same, inhale yourself. A scent he witnessed the first time so close when you returned his hoodie, and he already got addicted to it. Both of you could’ve stayed in this position for who-knows how long. It felt too good. Never did he feel so soothed, his eyes closing, hoping that the moment would last.

“Good morni – Oi, Lt. You’re back!” Kyle’s voice broke the sincere silence in the room and Johnny wanted to pour the hot beverages just over the Brit. Soap stayed extra silent during this moment, biting back his shit eating grin and teasing comments to grant both of you this moment, a moment of progress he wanted to witness for so long. He only glared at Kyle who simply shrugged. Because just then the two of you parted and Simon looked at Kyle, nodded in response before standing up again. Somehow to your fortune because otherwise he’d seen how red your face turned from a simple and friendly hug. Simon extended a hand to help you up and you gladly took it. Still wearing a sweet smile on your lips. His eyes are pinned on yours, but you couldn’t make out, what they wanted to tell you. You couldn’t read the expression that lingered between those dark orbs.

It’s another familiar voice that dragged your attention back, as your Captain walked into the office. “Good to see everyone together again.” He clapped in his hands. “Shall we start then?”

All of you talked about the last ops, and proceeding what would be the best after your now gathered knowledge. You found out which warehouse was the crux of the matter. Price made sure to speak with Laswell and König before taking further steps, but he already mentioned of heading out soon again. He dismissed everyone to go after their choirs for today.

Just before Simon wanted to leave, you stopped him by holding onto his wrist. A sweet but tired smile on your lips. He only looked at you, his eyes still saying the same as before and still you couldn’t get a grip of what they wanted to tell you. “’s something wrong?” He turned his body back to you while not pulling away. You shook your head no and lifted his hand by his wrist. He let you. You then fished in your pocket for the silvern lighter before placing it in his hand again. His palm closed.

“As promised,” you stated before letting go of his wrist and you could see how the corner of his eyes started to crinkle. Your smile only grew abit, before you left the office to go after your day without any more troubles. He looked after you. He wanted to say something about the note, something about the days separated. Anything, but again, he just stood there and watched as you walked away. A sigh left Johnny’s throat as he walked past him. Simon did somehow mirror this sigh, before leaving himself.

It was late when you found yourself in the common room again. Beth had some new company over, and they weren’t really decent about their hustles. It haunted you more than the roaring canons. So, you decided to stay on the couch for the night. You slept in worse places, the couch was still better than a lot of those. You only had the small light next to the couch on, while you were still in his clothing, your blanket draped over your body. As you mindlessly typed a message into your phone. König sent you a picture of him and his teammate some time ago, asking how you’ve been, and you still hadn’t responded. So now was a good time for it. Now was two in the morning. You sighed as you realized, your sleep schedule was more messed up than ever. Your head fell back onto the couch when you heard steps. They became louder and in the dim light you couldn’t really see, who was approaching the room. But soon you could see the familiar statue with the soft skull balaclava standing next to the couch. Somehow absently, nearly disoriented. Something so uncommon for him.

“Simon?” Your voice was soft, not wanting to scare him but he instantly turned on his heels. His exhausted eyes pinned on your figure. He looked as confused as you. “Everything alright?” you asked softly sitting up from the couch and facing him properly. He now stood in front of the couch and shrugged. His shoulders lower than you were used to.

“’st wanted to get some tea...” A sigh left his throat. He seemed so tense. He definitive didn’t just come here for some tea. “What are ya doin’ here?” He pinched the bridge of his nose before looking down at you.

“Neighbor is a bit too noisy. So, I thought of sleeping here instead.” You chuckled a bit exhausted. You could literally sleep on a helo, but not while two people would have passionate sex in the room next to you. He nodded, the exhaustion clinging to his shoulders. It made you worry. He always comforted you; you could always reach out to him. But he still was somehow so distant. Nothing you’d push, but still you’d wish he would let you in. Sometimes a little push into the cold water could do wonders…maybe…

"Do you truly trust me?" You suddenly threw the blanket to the side and stood up from the couch, slowly approaching him as your hand reached out to gently wrap around his wrist once more, examining his tired eyes. Looking for any hints of discomfort. His senses were overwhelmed as you touched him again, by the closeness of your body, the warmth of your hand, your gentle touch. He didn’t know what you were up to, still he did trust you, so he only nodded. With that you moved a bit closer. Only a tiny gap separating your bodies when your hand found his. Fingers wrapping around his. He wanted this for himself, but he couldn't accept it, yet he didn't deny it, didn't try to escape your embrace. His brain reminded him how good it felt to have you close to him. Just like this morning. The selfish aching too huge to feel it again. Your eyes never leaving his as you moved backwards, back to the couch step by step and pulling him with you. He followed your figure. Glance pinned onto those deep brown orbs, still searching if his eyes screamed for escape out of this, but they didn't. Those dark eyes starred into yours with nothing than trust and a hint of curiosity or was it hope?

You slowly lowered yourself back onto the long part of the couch, dragging him down with you. You didn't even realize what you were doing. You were on autopilot, following what your heart desired. Was it inappropriate? Was it too much? You didn't care, you just wanted to provide him with the feeling of comfort and safety he did for you all the time.

Your body completely lowering itself on the couch and pulling him on top of you. He was hesitant, but still he followed your lead. Laying his head just below your chest on your stomach. His brawn body between your legs as you pulled your blanket over both of you with your free hand. He was stiff, didn't dared to move and his heart pounded in his chest, still he clung to your hand, not wanting to let go. You could feel his chest vibrating against your body, the beating of his heart strong and nearly painfully fast. Yours was steady, you couldn't even believe yourself how calm you were. Maybe it was because you finally accepted your fate, your emotions. Maybe it was because you knew he needed you now. Or at least you wished that he would.

"Just relax." Your voice soothing calm. Letting your hand trace lazy circles on his back, while breathing in those different layers of scents radiating from him. He lowered himself, letting his complete weight down on you, relaxing his tense muscles and sunk completely into you. Simon pulled you even closer, allowing himself to be vulnerable in this way for once in his life, his free hand searched your waist while the other still held on to the one that dragged him straight into heaven. His nightmares haunted him, his trauma kept him awake at night, but you chased the demons away. For once he allowed himself to enjoy this, to rest, laying in your embrace. To let the cold the wall of ice around his soul had created melt away. He closed his eyes, listening to your steady heartbeat. A melody so soothing. Breathing in your scent, feeling the soft fabric of his own hoodie on your body. God, he wished you would wear it more often. He loved the view of you in his clothes. He loved the way your scent clung to it afterwards. He loved the way your touch felt even through his clothes. After the warmth of the hug this morning, after you pulled him close now, he was scared that he would grow addicted to it. He didn't want to admit it, but he loved the way you made him feel. The way you made Simon feel. The sound of your breathing, of your heart slowly lulled him into a deep and peaceful slumber and just like that, you drifted away yourself. The cold finally left the last fibers of your body with him being the coziest weighted blanket you'd ever had.

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[readychilledwine]

Hi me again.. sorry for the many uses of fuck I just submitted I swear I wasn’t trying to be mean 😭 but also I can not get over that plot twist. And he being all like “fuck me properly mate” at the end 🥵. And she immediately drew up all conclusions and him leading the naga to her to scare her back to him. Like her character screams power but like casually. Like she knows (and Eris knows) what she can and if you cross her well 🤷🏼‍♀️ your loss ig.

Idk I’m rambling. You’re a fantastic writer and your imagination is impressive 😘

Xo

So, these are my favorite messages, and I did not take any offense because to me, I can feel your excitement in the plot twist.

Seren is going to be delicious. She's seductive, intelligent, and (like you noticed) very powerful but doesn't feel the need to show it. Part 3 will give us a lot of needed soft love between her and Eris while keeping a slightly possessive and protective side of him. It's fairly long and has the potential for a batboy appearance.

I'm so happy that you were caught off guard, excited, and wanted to reach out! I hope I can continue to keep you hooked! Thank you for all the love and compliments 💕

[mikeyphotography]

Nick Folio from Bad Omens in Winnipeg Canada 2019