#does this count as a contribution? 😂

[donttellunclesam]

"Steve throws one of those raised-eyebrow looks over his shoulder. 'You coming?' he calls, badly hiding a laugh as he watches Eddie waddle along behind him in his big dumb yellow jacket."

haz read my mind and wyn asked nicely, so here it is! based on the lovely, sexy, hilarious collab fic baby it's cold outside (but it's real warm in your mouth) by @wynnyfryd and @griefabyss69

[slafkovskys]

All of this start of the season Jack content is making me feel things!!! All I can think about is him and older Norris reader after the ring toss! What does he plan for the date? How does it go? What is everyone in their lives reactions to it? Does she go to Jersey with him? Jess your writing is so immaculate this AU has infiltrated my brain😂🥰

read part one here :)

as she hears his footsteps descending the steps, she thinks about how she wouldn't be doing this for anyone else, especially not on a first date.

her dress and heels were long abandoned in a guest room, instead exchanged for a pair of jack’s sweatpants and a too big t-shirt from her college days she had left at the hughes brothers’ house at some point during her many trips there over the past few weeks. her hair was now pulled away from her face, the fact that she had moved her wash day for the occasion be damned.

“so,” he lets out a big sigh before quite literally falling onto the l-shaped part of the sofa beside her. she’s got her legs tucked underneath her, a wine glass held tight in one hand, and her head resting on another on the back of the couch. the remote is resting on her thigh and all either of them had to do was press play on the third mighty ducks movie (“it’s better than miracle, jack. not even an argument,” and she quickly learned that jack does whatever she wants, so that was an easy debate to have before he retreated to shower) that had been queued on the screen for the past twenty minutes. instead, jack throws an arm lazily over her legs, gives her that stupid grin of his she’s become obsessed with, and nods, “tell me about y/n.”

“you know about y/n,” she states as though it was a fact, which it was. they weren’t strangers to each other in the slightest, having been somewhat background characters in each other’s lives for the last eight years.

“no, i don’t. i know about the y/n whose posts i see on instagram or whatever updates my mom tells me she’s learned from your mom. that doesn’t count,” his index finger traces the outside seam of the pants she was wearing from her calf, to just above her knee, and back, “i want to know about the y/n in front of me.”

“okay then,” she takes a deep breath, swirling her wine around in her glass before taking a sip, “i was born here in michigan, but moved to germany for a little while when my dad was still playing. before you ask me, no, the only german i can remember is my old address and how to tell them i was lost. when we moved back here, i picked up hockey for a couple of years before deciding to leave it to the boys-”

“you played defense, right?” jack interrupts, staring at her with such an interest.

she hums, “why do you think i always win when me and my brothers fight? i had potential, but it really just wasn’t for me.”

“is that so? because i remember a certain tipsy moment a few weeks ago where you said you quit because you didn’t like the colors of the uniform.”

“that may have been a contributing factor, but i was fourteen and very fashion-conscious. you can’t hold that against me,” she rolls her eyes. she catches sight of the wristbands on his arm and she can’t help but to reach down and tug on them as she resumes her story, “anyway, graduated high school, moved to minnesota for college. go gophers-”

“debatable,” he teases.

“got my degree in communications. thought that i met the love of my life in the backyard of a sigma chi frat house, which we both know how that worked out. moved down to florida, got engaged, called off the engagement, and now i’m back living with my parents. i have lived a life, jack hughes,” she sighs as she finishes off her glass. she didn’t miss the way that his face twitched at the mention of derek and how she just barely ghosted over what had happened. due to the movement, his damp hair had fallen over his eyes and she reached out to push it away, “it’s going to take more than one glass of wine and a first date to get into the good stuff.”

“but i already knew all of that,” he huffs, “tell me something that i don’t already know. tell me about something that makes you happy.”

“recently?” she quirks an eyebrow and he hums, “honestly, you.”

and jack’s world comes to a screeching halt. for as long as he had known her, she wasn’t the type to get sentimental, vulnerable, but over the last two months, he felt that he had seen more versions of her than he knew existed. from the first night she was home, to that plane ride to florida to get her things, to watching her toss her engagement ring into the water right outside his house, it wasn’t enough. he wanted, no he needed more of her. he needed to know every single version of her, every single story, every single emotion that she had to offer him.

her eyes find his and he squeezes her knee, a silent ask. he watches as her throat bobs and just as he goes to crane his neck up to meet her, an alarm sounds. that stupid fucking pizza.

after scouring the entire grocery store, they couldn’t find any pre-breaded chicken for chicken parm and neither of them wanted to bother with doing it themselves. so that’s how they found themselves snatching up a premade pizza with a reduced sticker on the front because its sell-by date was that day and even though jack insisted on getting one that was fresher, she only rolled her eyes and insisted it would taste the same. he, of course, let her sit it in the basket along with the thing of cookies she suddenly had a craving for the second she laid eyes on them. the way her face lit up made it worth the extra work he was going to have to put in later.

despite the insistent beeping from the stove timer, neither of them dared to make a move to go and pull the pizza from the oven. she blinks, “we should probably go and check on it…”

“i think that it can wait for a couple of minutes,” and yeah, it definitely could, because jack was leaning in and so was she. the second their lips meet it’s like nothing either of them had felt before. the build-up, the tension between the two of them over the summer was worth it as they melted into the kiss.

jack’s hand grips onto her thigh while her hand cradles his cheek. it was easy to get lost in each other, lips moving against one another’s like they’d been doing this forever. only when the need for air becomes too great do they pull away panting, still holding onto each other like either would disappear at any given second.

“we really should go check on the pizza,” she insists, swearing she can smell the cheese starting to burn.

he frowns, “can we do more of that later?”

“if you hurry back, you don’t have to wait that long,” she incentivizes and jack is all but scrambling towards the kitchen with the sounds of her laughter following behind him.

yeah, this was definitely something they could get used to.

(they never did hit play on the movie and the pizza didn’t burn, but it didn’t get eaten either. they were too lost in each other to even bother slicing through the crispy dough as it grew colder and colder on the countertop. oh well.)

[chdarling]

I LOVE TLE and its characters but I don't like how from time to time James' world seems to revolve around Lily. I always read a lot of people saying they love to see Lily "give a shit" about what James gives, they hate to see her jealous and can't stand it when she suffers for him (and I can understand that) but I don't understand why there's all this support towards the opposite instead 😅I beg your pardon but it seems to me that too often when there's any Jily James is just Lily's minion

P. S. I hope I don't sound like a vicious hater because I usually appreciate everything you write

You don’t sound like a vicious hater, but I don’t really know what to tell you here. I get this critique from time to time, and I don’t know how to respond to it, because…yeah. James’s story revolves around Lily. Lily’s story revolves around James. It’s a jily story.

The part I take issue with is when it’s suggested that James’s story revolves more around Lily than vice versa. This is just categorically untrue. I’m bored on a train as I write this, so I just scrolled through TLE2, and there isn’t a single Lily chapter in which she is not at some point fixated on James. We actually spend quite a bit more time with James in the story, because while he and Lily have a roughly equal chapter count, James is hugely present in Sirius, Remus, and Peter’s chapters as well, while Lily is often less so. This might contribute to the perception that James spends more time fixated on Lily than she does him, but I still think it’s untrue.

The thing about crafting a narrative spanning seven years (1975-1981) told from seven different POVs is that you have to be fairly ruthless about which scenes and story arcs to prioritize. James has plenty in his world that doesn’t revolve around Lily, but the story is already about 100,000 words longer than I’d like it to be, so we hone and we focus. Every scene has to move the major arcs of the story forward or it gets cut.

In TLE2, James and Lily both have what I think of as their “big three” arcs. For Lily, this is her struggle with discrimination, her growing radicalization, and her relationship with James. For James, this is his reckoning with his father’s mortality, his growing political awareness, and his relationship with Lily. His father’s mortality and his political awareness both get tangled up with Lily, because she can relate to the former and she’s a helpful catalyst for the latter, but they’re not about her. And as for their relationship, well, I think getting over someone as an infatuated teen is hard under any circumstances, let alone when you basically live with the person and are forced to interact with them closely every day.

At the end of the day, though, TLE is a jily story. It started exclusively as a jily story, and then I ended up fleshing it out with additional POVs and plots, but it will always be a jily story at its core. It’s a story about young, doomed lovers who didn’t get to spend enough time together. That’s pretty much the thesis, and it will be the major focus of all Lily & James chapters in every book. Everything else is just part of the journey.

I do think people tend to empathize more deeply with Lily and maybe sometimes project onto James (as you describe hating when Lily suffers but then rooting for James to be jealous). My theory on this is that TLE readership tends to skew female; and as the only female POV character, many readers identify more closely with her struggles than James’s. But this is just generalization on my part and I have no real facts or statistics to back it up. And plenty of people love when Lily is jealous/pining for James, so it goes both ways! 😂

Anyway! This got long on account of the aforementioned train musing, but that’s just my take on the James vs Lily thing that comes up from time to time. I don’t really love the description of James as Lily’s minion, because I don’t think trying to be supportive to a marginalized friend while also struggling to get over (allegedly) unrequited feelings for said friend in as mature and respectful a way as possible for a hormonal teen boy is being a minion, but i do recognize that some people want the story to focus more on James and less jily. Unfortunately that’s just not the story I’m writing!

Cheers ❤️

[baronessblixen]

20 fanfic questions

tagged by @randomfoggytiger, @wexleresque and @maybe-its-beyond-words. Thank you!

How many works do you have on ao3?

393

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

731,163

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently only The X-Files. I have also written Fics for Friends, ER, Gilmore Girls, O.C., McLeod’s Daughters, Glee, Big Bang Theory, Frasier, Wings, Once Upon a Time, Who's the Boss?, and Hot in Cleveland.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Prompts & Drabbles

Fictober 2020

Love is Not Blind

Family Reunion

Some Things You Just Can't Fake

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always plan to and then I get overwhelmed. I think I responded to the comments on my first Fictober entry and then I just... stopped. I never know how long it is considered socially acceptable to thank someone. Like does it have to be a day? A week? I never know. What if I thank someone a week later and the person is like, who even is this?

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I truly don't know. I once wrote a major Character Death fic but considering the character was old, I'm not sure if angst applies.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I think I might have gotten hate on fics before but I don't remember. Pretty sure I've gotten hate for writing RPF.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I have written a few story with mild smut but it's not my favorite genre - to write or read.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

The only crossover I remember writing was Frasier/Hot in Cleveland. That's very niche, not sure if that can be considered crazy.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I recall. I have had people write sequels to my stories so that they could change things and make them how they wanted them. Which also isn't much fun.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have translated one of my own fics, haha.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I have! I was lucky enough to be asked to contribute to Eden.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Mulder and Scully, no doubt

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Years ago, I started this fic called The Skiing AU. I think it was during Fictober. Also The Five Minutes series which I love so much that I'm worried any new chapter can't live up to the existing parts.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, probably

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Everything that isn't dialogue. I can't set an atmosphere or write description in any shape or form. It doesn't help that I'm not a native speaker either.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I have written some dialogue in German for fic. It feels weird but why not?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Never posted online, but Scarecrow and Mrs. King. Though I think maybe the first fic I ever wrote was for The Lion King. Had no idea it was fanfiction, haha.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I think Coming Home.

Tagging @atths--twice @scullysexual and everyone who wants to!

[hanafubukki]

Ace Trappola’s Flower Bouquet Meaning

aka Hana rambles about flowers lolol

Twst Bdays Flower Language Masterlist

HE HAS ROSES in his bouquets!!! YESSSSS 🙌🙌🌺🌺💕💕💕

so so so I am loving all shades of pinks and purples and I just adore it.

if you think about it, shades of pink plays a role in Heartslabyul. Heartslabyul rules has students painting white flowers red. Now, if you mix those colors, it becomes pink.

In a way, this shows a blend of Ace. He respects the queen of hearts only for those expectations to be shattered because of Riddle, but then he grows and he gains that respect back after seeing how hard his dorm leader works. 

Plus if you think about all those theories about Ace becoming dorm head? it’s likely will be a mix of how Ace will uphold there queen’s law but at the same time maybe he’ll add his own twist to it?

his sun, moon, and wave side changed opposite from jamil’s....I wonder if that's just design choice of has some astrology meaning. Ace also has a mage hat too which we couldn't see before because it was blocked.

Ace doesn’t really show his emotions...well, well he does, but we all know how much of a little shit he can be. 

but, boy do his flowers give a bit of insight 

as always, flowers have different meanings in different countries and regions and it depends on colors too. I’m just going to list some flowers that I think they are, but I could be wrong lolol

Pink Roses: (different shades of pink all have different meanings) 

Dark Pink: thank you, I am grateful, gratitude, appreciation, I agree with you, I want to be with you.

Pale Pink: I am sorry, get well, healing, grace

Pink: Friendship, Chaste Love

Purple Rose: Achievement, success, high honor 

Number of roses is can contribute to meaning too:  [giving meaning of 10-15 since I counted at least 10]

10 Roses: You are perfection, you are pretty 

11 Roses: you are my treasured one, to assure someone they are truly loved, 

12 Roses: be my steady, asking them to be yours, love and admiration 

13 Roses: forever friends, eternal friends, secret admirer (ace you little shit lol 😂)

14 Roses: I’m proud of you.

15 Roses: I’m really sorry, asking for forgiveness, wish for forgiveness (ace betrayal theory anyone??) 

Carnation: Gratitude, never forgetting someone, you are unforgettable, thank you,

Dahlia: strength, perseverance to overcome, encouragement, You can do this, (dark colored dahlias also mean betrayal, sadness, insecurity...so betrayal theo- *ducks*)

Aster: loyalty, wisdom, faith, valor 

Gerbera: cheerfulness, celebration,  protected heart, emotional strength 

Azalea: abundance, hope for good things to come their way, love and passion, stay true (in some countries they even mean beauty and death -cough-)

Hypericum Berries: symbol of peace, protection, rebirth 

Zinnias: Absence, missing you, lasting affection, friendship. 

Chrysanthemums: friendship, happiness, well-being

Awww Ace you’re so cute! 🌺🌻💕 He shows gratitude, strength, and so much more in his bouquet, essentially expressing himself in way we would never get to see usually.  

Please please let all the Heartslabyul boys have roses too. And maybe, just maybe, Riddle can have one from each of his friends? That would be so cute!!

Random Facts:  Flowers can be assigned to days too. So since the 23rd is on a Friday, the flowers are: Forget-me-nots (Meaning: speak up, I will not forget you, don’t forget me, true love), Carnations, Love-in-a-Mist (such pretty flowers, meaning: Kiss me, you puzzle me, opens to love), and Pink Rose. Given what's in his bouquet, I think they probably considered the day too 👏💕

Anniversaries could also be considered, since its the 3rd bdays for all the boys, their flower will be Sunflower: strength  be well, strength, happiness, male healing, confidence, self-esteem, assertiveness.

Credit: Thank you to Lala (@/mobagehellocal) and Chris (@/jaberwockk) for talking flowers with me 🌺💚💕 Please, go talk flowers with them too. They are such nice people. 💚💜💕

[astroismypassion]

I noticed you mentioned you were a aqua Venus I think. My biggest and only heart break was one and still don’t really know why Becuase he didn’t break my heart and I ended it but it was the most painful thing😂

I’m a Sag sun, mercury and Venus. Scorpio rising and Virgo moon, Jupiter pisces

He: Pisces sun, Scorpio moon, Aquarius Venus, Aries rising , Jupiter Taurus

What do you think ?

Hi,

I'm Taurus Venus, to disappoint you. But I do have quite a bit of Libra over the 11th house, if that perhaps maybe still counts.

Yes, sometimes it does take a lot of strength to walk away from people that doesn't seem to contribute to our greater good. It's very hard to walk away from people, especially if there are any feelings, when distance it very much needed.

Oh wow, Sag Sun, Pisces Jupiter. Your ultimate type could be a water Sun sign, like Pisces Sun for example. But even Scorpio or Cancer might do. In which house is this Jupiter?

Well, but then again with Pisces Jupiter, do you perhaps even have "a type"? I kind of feel with this placement, you go for very different person from the previous one each time.

Ohhh, I get it now. Sorry, I didn't see the last part of the question fully, the "he" part. Ohh, so this is a Pisces Sun, Scorpio Moon nice. Taurus Jupiter, very nice, this is much more cerebral person than they appear probably.

Yes, I'm a fan, I think your Scorpio Rising pairs nicely with his Scorpio Moon, his Aries Rising, your Scorpio Rising, these are actually quite similar outlooks on life. You have Virgo Moon and this person has Pisces Sun, which is not too shabby either. Yeah, I approve. Now, how are the degrees? I'd suggest looking more into that as well, if you want.

@astroismypassion

[cuubism]

20 questions for fic writers!

tagged by @arialerendeair :) wow this is an ambitious game XD

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

162

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

906,535. I'm trying to hit 1 mil by the end of the year so wish me luck 😂

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Basically just Shadowhunters and Sandman with occasionally forays into others.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

a lucky break(out) (2,457), mind & heart, body & soul (2,112), don't mess with the high warlock of brooklyn (1,723), In Waking Dreams (1,141), and Complex Mathematics (1,068). Kind of a surprising spread tbh.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always, though it can take a while. It just feels nice to do.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Certainly After Life. Magnus died in that one.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmm, most of my fics have reasonably happy endings. The Silly Rabbit series is very happy. The chaotic whumptober fic Kidnapping Your Heart is basically just crack so I'd consider that one pretty happy too 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Only rarely, and usually it's on fics that I'd considered relatively unobjectionable, like MHBS, which is funny. The more fucked up stuff doesn't get hate but the stuff I thought was casual and mainstream does 😂 dunno why

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, though it's something I've had to get gradually more comfortable with over several years. With each fic I become further corrupted and venture into kinkier material. This can only be a good thing. I don't know exactly what we mean by what kind... I like when it's heavy on the feelings. Especially if the feelings are unspoken.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Usually no, but I threw Aziraphale and Crowley into Nightingales for one chapter. If I did ever write more crossovers it would probably only be between canons that seem to naturally meld together (like Good Omens and Sandman).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Well not that I know of [knock on wood]

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yup, Points of View was translated into Russian. Very cool.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Never in the direct sense of both contributing writing to the same document. I don't think that method would work well for me. But @magnusbae is my perennial brainstorming buddy who's crafted the backend story and vibes of so many of my fics, especially dreamling. I've done the same with @silver-lily-louise for some malec stories before too.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I don't know if I have one. Malec maybe for sheer longevity. I'm usually obsessed with one thing at a time and then just not obsessed with it at all at other times XD

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oof. I'd still like to finish my malec wips XD I begin to fear that I won't, though, since some would be so long and I've made so little progress on them this year. Maybe, though.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue (also my favorite part to write). Creating weird concepts, magics, functions of the world and so on. Language & style.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Sometimes I have to remind myself to do character introspection. I'll get through an entire scene and realize I haven't remarked at all on what the POV character is feeling, shown it externally maybe but not had them actually reflect internally. It comes from a combination of two things: spending a while in school writing film scripts and internalizing that writing style (all visuals no internal narration), plus just being kinda dissociated from my own feelings most of the time 😂 my characters aren't feeling shit because neither am I. I also tend to overcomplicate my plots and get myself mired in them, it's the number one reason I get stuck on fics or don't manage to finish them.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've only done it very very sparingly and I'm careful to get it right. Only used if it makes specific contextual sense.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Funnily enough it was probably also malec back when I was a teenager, before Shadowhunters show even existed, though I never posted anything then.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh gosh. For malec probably still dissolution. For dreamling I'm extremely fond of Deja vu, Deja connu, it really pushed me outside the bounds of the types of stories I usually gravitate towards, in a good way. At the moment more of my 'favs' are probably in sandman simply because changing fandoms forced me to up my game and expand my comfort zone, which was a good thing. I also really like how Patron Saint came out, I hadn't been that happy with a one shot in a while, and writing from Death's POV really helped me grasp her character better. One of my only fics that had a platonic relationship at its core, too.

tagging @pellaaearien, @tharkuun, @im-not-corrupted if you feel compelled to do 20 whole questions XD

[childotkw]

I have to confess that i've never finished Naruto, thus never ventured into the Warring States period etc.

I think i dropped the show/manga around Naruto's training with Kakashi, but you can't escape the internet, so i may not know all of what happens, but i do know about certain events that happen in the story.

Anyway, when you dropped your "Regulus Uchiha" AU idea i was simultaneously loving it while wondering -"who the hell is Izuna?". And then went and read the story you recommended - "Count Your Blessings" and became OBSESSED with fics depicting Tobirama(!), Madara, Izuna, and Hashirama. Thanks a bunch ;A; What is sleep, there is only AO3 ;A;

Sorry for the long intro, what i'm getting at is - what would the meeting between Tobirama and Regulus be like? What would their interactions be like? Would there even be any? I can't get this out of my head now ;A;

Oh, darling, I stopped watching halfway through the war so there's absolutely no judgement from me 😂 everything I about it was through internet osmosis as well hahahah

But yyyyyyyeeeeeeeesssssssssss Count Your Blessings is FUCKING INCREDIBLE OMG I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!!! I'm so happy you read it!

Tobirama is amazing and this fic was the one that made me actually sit down and think about how much shit this one dude actually contributed to Konoha. And sure, he made mistakes but name one leader or authority figure in the Naruto world that didn't.

As for Tobirama and Regulus - these two become best friends much to the consternation of literally every Uchiha. They're always hanging out, whether to talk business or just to spend time together - what precious little they have of it, in those first few years. Regulus becomes one of the only people who can keep up with Tobirama mentally, and Tobirama is just endlessly fascinated with Regulus' magic and could talk theories with him for hours. They're just in their own little happy experimenting / sciency bubble most of the time and it's both terrifying and beneficial for Konoha as a whole because Regulus is often the one to propose ideas (indoor plumbing, electricity, better resourcing and production techniques, etc.) and Tobirama is the only one smart and driven enough to be like "hold my beer" while he revolutionises an entire industry just because Regulus told him stories from his own world and Tobirama wants to see if he can recreate it (spoil: he can).

Izuna is offended because he's the one who's been closest to Regulus from the beginning and Tobirama is his rival so why is he cosying up to another Uchiha????? He feels like he's being cheated on twice. (But Regulus and Tobirama being buddies is a godsend in some ways because it puts Tobirama in Izuna's path more often in a way that Madara can't get all huffy about, so Izuna does change his tune quickly and the duo becomes a trio)

Madara is just suffering. He's had to deal with Izuna's not-so-subtle obsession with Tobirama for almost twenty years now, and just when he thought he had Izuna at a continuous, safe distance from the one dude who could probably squash him like a bug - his other (adopted) brother is suddenly attached to the guy at the hip.

Then he blinks and Izuna has now muscled his way into this mess and Madara just throws his hands up and accepts that Tobirama will end up living in his clan compound one day either because Regulus will just have the guy move in with him so they can be besties forever and ever or because Izuna will somehow convince himself that making Tobirama an Uchiha too would be a brilliant idea (through marriage or adoption, Madara is too scared to ask. With Izuna, he can never tell.).

[roalinda]

another small contribution to @prongsfoot-microfic

You can read this as a sequel of cat which I have written for # prongsfoot wednesday or separately. Point is, I have a HC that prongsfoot has a cat named Marie Antoinette. 🐱😂

April 19 - Memory

( + March 18 lion )

"How about Regulus?" 

Sirius couldn't help but to stare at James as if he was a permanent resident in St. Mungo’s mental ward because suggesting that sounded insane, as if James was asking him to throw his precious bike under the Hogwarts Express just to win a dare.

"What about Regulus?" He snapped and narrowed his eyes and James gulped, not because he felt nervous all of a sudden, of course not, but because the storm in Sirius' silver glare was too distracting for a weak man like him who was ready to throw himself in the middle of it willingly.

"We can name it Regulus." 

Sirius tried to keep a straight face. He really tried but unfortunately he was not capable of making his usual Black poker face when it came to James. Even if he could, James' suggestion was too ridiculous for him to maintain one. It was stupid.

Laughter bubbled up in his chest and he couldn't help but to laugh aloud, untamed mirth dancing in his eyes instead of bitter doubt. James' features were dejected in the most endearing way and the way disappointment was shining in his pretty doe eyes only made Sirius laugh more. His lover was delightfully sweet.

"What? It is glorious and royal, a lion! Gryffindor!" James pouted petulantly.

"Thank you for comparing my Slytherin brother to a lion," was Sirius' flat reply and James winced at the sarcastic tone. He had absolutely forgotten about that small detail.

"Luckily for us, she is a she, not an it, not a he, not a they, not…" 

James coughed before Sirius could go on and on, disturbingly fluent in every language known to humanity. "Yes, yes. I get it. It's a female cat," he said grudgingly.

"That means Regulus is out of question, not that I would have let you to name it after my brother even if she was a male cat," frowned Sirius, petting their new little kitten who was purring on his lap happily.

"I wasn't naming her after your brother, I was naming her after the star," protested James.

"One star is enough for you," Sirius remarked slyly. "I want to name her Marie Antoinette anyway," He ignored James' gaping face. "It's glorious and royal enough, isn't it?"

"As long as you don't count the guillotine," whispered James gruffly and this time Sirius ignored him, already cooing and calling the adorable creature Marie Antoinette. 

"I think that name is too glorious for a cute kitten like her," James protested weakly although he knew he had already lost the game.There was no way he was going to win against Sirius when it came to anything related to animals.

"But I guess we can name our next cat Regulus," Sirius whispered hushedly, running a soft hand through Marie Antoinette's fur. There was a strange nostalgic hue in his eyes as if he was remembering his childhood, the private and precious parts of it.

James smiled. Well then, as long as Sirius was happy it was not a complete loss. A happy family of three. But…

"Wait, next cat?!" 

[shina913]

Scions, Ch.7 | Kim Line + JHS

Scions, 7

sci·​on | \ ˈsī-ən \ Definition:(1)a descendant(2) a shoot or twig, especially one cut for grafting or planting

✼Scions Masterlist✼

Pairing: Fem!Reader Sister + Kim Brothers; JHS x Fem!Reader

Rating: M (🔞)

Genre: Siblings!AU; Marriage!AU; FWB!AU; exes to ?; Mom!Reader; Brother’s Best Friend; drama; angst; smut; fluff

Warnings: ANGST!!!; DRAMA!!!; multiple POV switches; character death; ots of crying–like, A LOT; parenting frustrations; parenting fears; vulnerable confessions; cussing; pining; marriage troubles; mentions of divorce/separation; emotional outbursts; mourning; soft sibling moments

Word count: 7,715 words

Summary: Four grown siblings return to their childhood hometown after their father is declared to be terminal. They are forced to live under the same roof for days, along with their overbearing mother, to say their final goodbyes. It starts off nostalgic until some unresolved family issues along with an assortment of spouses, exes, and might-have-beens make things even more interesting.

A/N: Happy 2023 and sorry this took so long! I had a long-ass note and somehow it got deleted 😂 Woops! Anyway, I wanted to thank all of those who have just recently discovered this story. I love reading all of your notes and thoughts on it as this story is very special to me. It's not an easy read nor is it easy to write (as I've said many times) because it's just...super heavy angst and drama! But I am happy that some of you are enjoying it and looking forward to the next installments!

A/N2: Joon's eulogy was taken from one of his insta stories from May 2022--yes, I have been holding onto this for that long! Translation was taken (verbatim) from @/eternalhyyh on Twt.

A/N3: There are some references to scenes from the two one-offs that were previously posted (Sunshine and Joon & Jooni). One scene in particular picks up right after the end of J&J but it's not super essential that you read those. They just contribute to the story and provide additional context.

After the funeral directors came by to pick up his dad’s body to bring him to the mortuary for cremation, Taehyung retreated to his childhood bedroom. He’d been sitting on the floor for who knows how long. The tears would come and go, especially when he would catch glimpses of old family photos that were displayed on his walls and his bookshelf.

Out of his siblings, he was taking it the hardest. His hero was gone and there was nothing he could do to remedy that.

His nephew and niece tried to coax him out of his room but he couldn’t face them…not like this. He was a mess.

Taehyung took pride in being the ‘fun’ uncle. Always playing games and putting smiles on their faces. The kids were also innately introspective so if they saw any hint that he was upset, they would ask questions about it.

And he wasn’t in the right headspace to talk about any of it yet.

He overheard Namjoon’s voice on the other side of the door, murmuring something about taking the kids to the park. Seconds later, the shadows between the gap of the floor and door moved away, much to his relief.

Sniffling, he reached for his phone by his bedside. He wasn’t sure why but he felt like he needed to confide in somebody…somebody who wasn’t family. Somebody who was emotionally removed from the situation.

“Hi,” he said shakily when the other line picked up. “Do you have a minute?”

******

Eunhae does one final sweep of her hotel room, checking to make sure that she didn’t leave anything. And if she did, it was unlikely that she’d ever come back to this area anyway.

She’d been gone from the office for a few days. And while the nature of her job allowed her to work remotely, it wasn’t like Taehyung was necessarily welcoming her with open arms.

For years, she happily relished in her independence. She didn’t like the idea of ‘belonging’ to someone. The idea of not being tied down to anybody was important to her. She was content with only having to worry about herself, for the most part since her family already worried her enough.

When she first met Taehyung, he was someone that she was instantly physically attracted to. The fact that he offered to carry her giant boxes from the moving truck and into her apartment was a bonus. 

He agreed to a no-strings arrangement but she could tell that he didn’t typically go for relationships like that. He was a gentle soul, always thinking about his family and friends.

Even after they’d slept together, he always offered that she stay the night, get something to eat, or just hang out for a bit. 9 times out of 10, she would decline. Spending time together after doing the deed almost always led to some type of attachment. But the times that she would agree, he considered it as a privilege.

He always treated her with respect even though her promiscuity would have other people looking at her differently. He was never the type to just leave right after he got what he wanted. And it was those times that made Eunhae reconsider how she felt about relationships. 

After years of living around the city and several casual encounters, she realized that she’d never met anybody like him. It was just unfortunate that she had gone into self-preservation mode right when Taehyung needed somebody.

She’d spent enough time kicking herself for being such an idiot about it. It was what brought her out here to begin with. Unfortunately, Taehyung would have none of it.

While she searches for the TV remote to check herself out of the room, her phone rings loudly from her purse.

It was probably the office again, she thought.

As soon as she retrieves it, the caller ID catches her off-guard.

“H-hey,” she answered. “You know what, I’m still in town. Do you want me to come over?”

******

When Namjoon returned from the park with the kids, his mom immediately greets him by the door asking if he had his suit laid out for tomorrow.

“How could I not bring a suit? I can’t believe…” he muttered to himself.

“Don’t even worry about it, darling!” His mom’s voice echoed through the bedroom from her walk-in closet.

“I was in such a hurry, it didn’t even cross my mind,” he says again, ignoring her comments.

“That’s alright, Namjoonah. You know, you and your dad are pretty much the same size? I mean, right before he got sick.” He turned around to find his mom holding a jacket open for him. It gave him pause, but she remained in that position, waiting to put it on him.

He glances at her for a moment, her expression was soft–one that he rarely saw. Growing up, he made life difficult for her every time she was on a break from filming or if she was in-between projects. Every time he defied her, he would see this hardened look on her face–one of frustration and disappointment.

Namjoon wasn’t always as compliant as his siblings were. He always went against the grain–which caused some constant conflict between him and his mother.

When he left for university, it was one of the best times of his life. He missed his siblings and his old friends but he also felt some relief to not feel obligated to spend time with his mom whenever she was home. He either had to study for exams, attend a workshop, or wanted to save on the bus fare home.

Come to think of it, this is the most time he has spent with her, in the same space, after over a decade.

He swallowed the emotions that bubbled up inside him. He took a step towards her then turned around to stretch his arms backwards. Once he slipped his hands through the armholes, his mom pulled the jacket up his arms and onto his shoulders. He felt her small hands do a quick sweep over his shoulder blades to smooth the material.

Afterwards, she moved around him. His eyes shifted downward while he watched her straighten out the lapels and brush off some errant traces of lint.

 “Ma, you don’t have to do that, I can–”

“Shush and just let me do this, adeul.”

He released a long, exasperated breath…and let her be.

“You know, this was one of your dad’s favorites. I had it custom-made for him,” she muses.

Namjoon gets a whiff of his dad’s scent on the jacket and a calm washes over him. It smelled of citrus-mint bar soap…one that he used for as long as Namjoon can remember. His dad was but a creature of habit. He could have gone and used all of those artisanal bath oils and scents that his mom brought from her travels but he always stuck to the same one.

His dad once said that it was the same soap that they carried at the resort where they had honeymooned as newlyweds.

He happened to find the manufacturer and ordered copious amounts of them. To this day, he kept a small stock in a waterproof, air-tight container in the basement. Namjoon chuckled at the memory.

A few more seconds of fussing with his collar, his mom stepped back and cocked her head to the side, admiring her handiwork. “There. So handsome,” she smiled appreciatively.

Namjoon snorts at the remark. “Mom…please,” he says, cheeks slightly flushed from embarrassment.

“What? I’m not allowed to compliment my son? My smart, successful, handsome son? Whom I’m very proud of, by the way,” she added.

Namjoon’s eyes shift downward.

She cocked her head to the side and touched his cheek. “Hey–what’s with the long face?”

“Proud?” His lips quirked morosely. “I’m not sure if I deserve your pride. I’m…I don’t even know if I would be proud of myself.”

She scoffed. “And why not?”

“My marriage is ending because my wife cheated on me right under my nose, my life is in shambles…and now I’m bringing a baby into the world?”

“Is that why you haven’t talked to him in the last few weeks? Is that why you tried to keep this from us? You think we’d think less of you?”

“Ma, even I think less of me right now. I…” he opened his mouth to say something, but struggled to find the right words. “I usually know what my next move would be…but…for some reason, I just feel…” he sighed, “...lost.”

She hummed, understanding his predicament. “A baby, huh? You must be terrified.”

He scoffed. “I am.”

“Well–not sure if it’s any consolation, but that feeling never goes away.”

“That’s reassuring,” Namjoon says sarcastically.

“Why don’t you tell me what you’re afraid of, darling?”

“Uhh…everything! I don’t even know where or how to start raising another human. I can’t even figure out my life right now.” He runs both hands through his hair, suddenly feeling a cold sweat break through his scalp. “What would I teach this kid?”

“Why don’t you sit down, before you give yourself an aneurysm, Namjoonie?”

He sits on his parents’ old bed, which was most recently moved back into the master bedroom after hospice staff picked up the hospital bed and other medical equipment following his dad’s passing.

His mom sits right next to him.

“Sweetheart, do you remember when Jooni was born?”

Namjoon smiles nostalgically at the memory. “Like it was yesterday.”

“Do you remember how you felt when you first held her?”

He laughed. “I was…very scared! She was so small and…I was so nervous, I thought I would drop her.”

“And did you?” She asked quietly.

He shook his head gently. “YN said that, if you loved something that precious, even the clumsiest person would hang on to it as if their life depended on it.”

“And you held her so carefully and so close to you.”

“I did…for over an hour! I didn’t even care that my arm fell asleep,” He laughed softly. “It felt nice.”

His mom smiled. “That’s what being a parent is, Namjoon. It’s terrifying at first because there are so many things that you don’t know. You can plan things out in advance in anticipation for the worst possible scenario but…that’s just not how it works. You learn as you go”

Then she turned and looked at him lovingly. “You just need to love them and do the best you can for them. You hang on to them tightly until they’re ready to let go and set off on their own.”

Namjoon hung his head and stared at the floorboards. “Do you think Vee and I have already screwed this kid up with this divorce?”

His mom rests her arm on his shoulder and squeezes it gently, her expression unyielding but reassuring. “Honey, I think that if you stayed in an unhappy marriage, that would not be healthy for your child either. Most people think that you need to prioritize your child’s happiness before yours–but I disagree. Self-sacrifice is a given when you decide to have children but at the end of the day, you need to take care of yourself, too. It’s an absolute necessity…so that you can take care of others.”

Namjoon nods, allowing his mom’s words to sink in. He knew that his family was unconventional. His parents’ generation was all about doing things for the benefit of the whole family. You didn’t take care of yourself, you didn’t do things for yourself–that was selfish.

Somehow, his parents found a balance to defy all that. They found a way to make their dreams come true and love their children at the same time. While self-sacrifice was evident in all of the decisions they made for their family, self-love also took precedence. It was how his parents reinforced their marriage.

She rubs the back of his neck softly, which he finds comforting. After that, she gives him a kiss on his temple. “You’ll be okay, Namjoonie. We’re here to help you get through this.”

Namjoon lets out a wry chuckle. “You’re way more optimistic than I am. I probably have the worst parental instincts!”

“‘Worst parental instincts’?” She laughed at how ridiculous he was being. “Who was it who volunteered to take the children out to the park for a bit of playtime?”

“That was coincidental. Everyone was busy with stuff and I didn’t want the kids to get bored or get in the way.”

She rolled her eyes. “Give yourself a bit more credit, Namjoon. I see how you are with Joobin and Jooni.”

He continues to wave her off. “That’s different. I play with them for a bit, keep them company…At the end of the day, I get to give them back to YN. It’s kind of like library books.”

Mouth falling open, she gasps and clutches her chest in disbelief. “Kim Namjoon! You did not just compare your niece and nephew to library books?!”

He chuckled in return. “I love books—and I love Joobin and Jooni.” His face falters for a second, turning more serious. “…but they’re not mine. It’s…I don’t know how to explain it.” He sucked in a breath, trying to make out the words. After a few beats, he continued, “I just feel like…I’ll have less room for error when it’s my kid.”

His mom frowned. “Why would you think that?”

Her question was met with silence. She put her hand on his cheek and gently urged him again. “Joonie, tell me.”

He sighed heavily, looking up at her with sad eyes. “I just feel like, after all those years that I treated you badly, maybe this is the universe’s way of getting payback…you know, because I was a bad son to you.”

The words pierced her chest like a barb. They didn’t have the easiest relationship and Namjoon always seemed intent on keeping a rebellious streak but her love for him never wavered.

“Oh, honey…no. No, no, no,” she desperately wrapped her arms around his too-large-frame. “Whatever stuff we were going through…you shouldn’t think of it as some generational thing. Me being away all the time was tough not just on you but on me, too.”

Namjoon sniffled. Regretting all those years that he punished his mom for being absent during his formative years. She did what she needed to…and it was never without his dad’s blessing. He realized that now.

“I’m sorry for not giving you a break, ma,” Namjoon mumbled.

“It’s all water under the bridge.” She pulls away from him and gives his forehead a lingering kiss. “I love you and I just want what’s best for you…always.”

Namjoon stared back into his mom’s eyes. All those years of animosity that he put between them–she just waved it all away with a kiss.

“I love you, mom.”

“I love you, too, darling,” she smiled. “And not that you need to hear this from me but I think you’ll be a great father. You care a great deal about your family–and I think that matters a lot when you’re raising children.”

******

You weren’t the only one on autopilot. Almost everyone in this house was trying to keep themselves busy.

When Namjoon and the kids returned from the park, you handed them off to Sam. Thankfully, he canceled all of his calls and meetings since the funeral was scheduled for tomorrow.

“Where are the kids?” Jin had just emerged from the study. He’d been on the phone with the minister confirming details on the memorial and coordinating with his staff at the restaurant for the reception. 

His staff. It was a strange thought. Only days ago, they were your dad’s staff. Even though he relinquished that role to Jin ever since he decided to ‘retire,’ they still considered him as their boss.

“With Sam,” you say, looking up from the soup you were stirring.

He snorted. “At least he’s being useful. I think I’ve only seen him a total of two hours since he arrived. Even in those two hours, he always had that fucking earpiece on,” he says, referring to Sam’s bluetooth headset.

You sighed heavily at Jin’s grumblings about your husband. He didn’t dislike Sam…at least not at the outset. When you brought him home to meet your family, Jin had resigned himself to the fact that this man was going to be in your life, and in turn, his life.

Unlike Namjoon, there was no benefit to wishing that someone else was in his place instead.

But as time went on, Jin grew tired of Sam being away so much, leaving you to deal with the kids and manage your home.

“He’s been busy, oppa. Unfortunately, some foreign clients don’t really care about personal stuff. They just want to know how and when they’re going to get their money.”

Jin wanted to argue that point but he didn’t have the energy. Thankfully, when Namjoon got back from the park, he handed him the list of family members and friends whom he hadn't called yet.

“Where’s Yoojung?” He asks instead.

You were thankful for the change in subject. “Unnie wasn’t feeling well. I told her to go lie down so I offered to finish this up for her.”

“She’s been doing a lot in the last few days,” he says, leaning against the kitchen counter.

“I know. Do you want to go upstairs and keep her company? I’ll let you guys know when dinner’s ready.”

Jin nods and starts to walk off to check on his wife upstairs but turns back around.

“Hey,” he says cautiously.

You look up at him.

He hesitates for a beat, hoping that he wasn’t speaking out of turn. But he was the eldest and he knew that you always respected any advice he gave. He moistens his lips. “Whatever it is you and Sam are going through…just know that whatever you decide, we’ll support you.”

Your breath caught in your throat. For nearly four years, you tried to cover up your marital issues. You and Sam have gone through counseling and after a few sessions, it seemed like things were going to work out.

This time, though? It was becoming more evident that your marriage was beyond repair. Even after your conversation with your dad, you hadn’t made up your mind yet. You thought you could revisit all of that after the memorial, when you and Sam got back to the city.

Although, it seemed as if Jin was as intuitive as your dad was.

“Oppa, I…” Your shaky voice betrayed your resolve.

“I know that if dad were still here, he would say the same thing,” he says softly.

Your nose stung and you felt the tears well up in your eyes. At the first sob you let out, Jin instantly wraps you in his arms tightly. 

“Hey…it’s gonna be okay, YN.” He rubbed your back soothingly.

“Please don’t tell Joon yet,” you whimpered. 

“Is it because you’re afraid that he can finally kick Sam’s ass?”

You pulled away, chuckling while wiping your tears. “No,” you answer. “He’s just got a lot to deal with right now. I’ll tell him eventually.”

Jin nodded. “I hear you. I will say though, nothing good ever comes out of keeping secrets. Not saying that you were doing it maliciously but…you think you’re protecting people’s feelings when you could be making things worse by not trusting them enough to be understanding about it.”

He wiped the tears that dripped from your cheeks. “At some point, you have to choose whether trying to be strong in front of your kids is worth sacrificing your own happiness.”

He pulls you close for another brief hug and plants a kiss on the crown of your head. “You know that I love you, right?”

You nodded wordlessly.

“Good.”

Before he walks away, the doorbell rings. “I’ll get it,” he says. “Just finish up with the soup.”

“Thank you, oppa.”

******

Jin is surprised to see Eunhae at their front door. She bows to him, giving her condolences.

“Thank you,” he replies sullenly. “If you’re here for Taehyung…he’s…” He scratches the back of his head uncomfortably, unsure how to tell her that his little brother had barricaded himself in his bedroom. ”I’m not sure if he’s up to seeing anyone.”

Eunhae nodded. “I understand.” She omits telling Jin that Taehyung called her and that she offered to come over. She figured that none of his family members have been able to coax him out. “I’d like to try? Uhm…you know, talking to him?”

Jin sighed. At this point, he’d try anything to get Taehyung out of his room. The memorial was tomorrow and he hoped that the whole family would pull it together to send off their dad properly.

He was worried sick about Taehyung. He hadn’t spoken or eaten in the last two days. Yoojung and YN would leave bowls of food by the door and they would remain untouched hours later. The only activity that came out of his room were sounds of old jazz and soul music–songs from their father’s playlist.

“Sure,” Jin invites her in. He offers her some refreshments but she respectfully declines. He then walks her up the steps towards Taehyung’s room. Jin knocked at the door to let him know that Eunhae was here. As expected, there was no response.

He shrugged at her. “Good luck, I guess?” She gave him a polite, grateful smile before he excused himself to check on Yoojung.

Eunhae knocks on the door again and calls to him. “Taehyung? Can I come in?” A few seconds of silence, and she’s about to give up but the door clicks and a disheveled Taehyung stands in front of her.

******

The house felt suffocating so Taehyung asked if Eunhae could drive out by the lake. He needed some fresh air.

“I hope you don’t mind. I called Jungkook and told him about the memorial.” She says, after turning the car engine off.

Taehyung nodded absentmindedly in acknowledgement.

“I just asked him to spread the word–and let your other friends or coworkers know.”

“Thanks,” he replies quietly. “Sorry, I’ve just been…out of it.”

“You don’t have to apologize. You’re going through a lot,” she says understandingly.

“I…I don’t even know what to do with myself,” he mumbled, before rubbing his bloodshot eyes.

She could tell that he wanted to spill his guts out to her but he was holding back. This was something personal…deeply so. And this was never part of their agreement.

But she knew, from the moment she picked up his call and offered to come over, all of those boundaries that she set up to keep him within arm’s reach were out the door.

“I’m here to listen.”

Taehyung turned his head away from the window to face her. She was staring back at him, unmoved. Her eyes drift down to his hand and without hesitation, she reached out to rest her hand over his and gave it an assuring squeeze.

“I’m here for you,” she says.

His eyes flicked down to their clasped hands. When Taehyung called her, he thought that he only needed a sounding board. In reality, he needed her.

And so he talked. He talked about his dad and how much he loved him…and how sad he was that he wasn’t going to be around anymore.

And she listened while he got it all out. She watched him cry and whimper. She saw him surrender to the grief that he was feeling. She wasn’t sure why he felt as if he had to hide this from his siblings. They all seemed very supportive and loving.

After an hour, he got himself together and asked if she could drive him back to the house.

When they returned, they were greeted by his sister. She insisted that Eunhae stay for dinner.

While they sat and ate, his brothers discussed other things that needed to be done before tomorrow’s memorial. She watched him nod obediently, volunteering for tasks, even if they weren’t asked of him.

Eunhae realized that Taehyung was struggling to find his footing in his family. He’s spent so much time trying to come off as someone who was carefree…when in fact, he cared a lot. It must be difficult to be overshadowed by three older siblings who already had their paths laid out.

Discussions then led to the events happening the next day. The memorial was supposed to start early in the morning in their home. A florist would come by to set up an arrangement in the middle of the living room with their father’s portrait, followed by mourners bowing and paying their respects.

The memorial would then be followed by a brief reception at the family’s restaurant.

“Eunhae, you don’t have to rush back, do you?” His mom asks.

“M-ma, let’s not impose on Eunhae. She might need to get back–”

“What Taehyung means is that, I’d be honored to stay, Mrs. Kim,” Eunhae cuts Taehyung off.

His mom smiled warmly. “Very good.”

*******

“Hey, listen–I just want you to know that if you have other stuff going on back in the city, you don’t need to stick around.” Taehyung said as he walked Eunhae out to her car.

Her eyebrows knitted. “I really don’t mind. I want to be able to pay my respects, too.”

He nodded. “I know but…I just don’t want you to feel that my mom’s lured you into something you feel like you can’t back out of.”

She chuckled. “Your mom is a lovely person. I’m happy to be wherever she welcomes me.”

They both exchange awkward smiles before Eunhae gives a small wave, leaving him standing on the curb while she rounds her car to get to open the driver side door.

Taehyung cleared his throat. “T-thanks again…” he blurts out.

“What for?”

He dug his hands in his pockets and shrugged. “For being someone whom I needed.”

“And that is?”

After a brief pause, he sighed. “A good friend.”

With a small nod and smile, she says, “Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

*******

The funeral goes as planned. Even with barely a 2-day notice, the community showed up. As with tradition, the family lined up beside the funeral altar–spouse first, followed by their children, according to birth order: Jin, Namjoon, YN, and Taehyung. Mourners were welcomed by Yoojung and Victoria at the door, and afterwards made their offerings to the dead, then paid their respects to the family.

Afterwards, everyone was invited to gather at the family’s restaurant for a brief reception.

Yoojung, who was feeling much better today, pulled it together to manage the whole event, as was her duty as the eldest son’s wife. Sam was on kid-duty while Vee made small-talk with other guests.

Hobi volunteered his time and one of his staff, Yoongi, to help with the reception. After he paid his respects earlier that morning, he went straight from the family home and into the restaurant to get everything set up before guests arrived for the reception. He was following Yoojung’s lead in terms of food and service, while he left Yoongi in charge to manage beverages.

When Jin arrived, he walked through the kitchen, thanking the staff for their hard work. He spotted Hobi walking through with an emptied chafing dish.

“Hobah?”

“Yes, hyung?” He puts the dish in the sink to soak. “Everything ok? Do you need anything?”

“No, everything’s great. I just wanted to thank you for keeping everything going and helping Yoojung.”

Hobi gives Jin a warm smile. “It’s the least I could do, hyung. Everybody’s here to celebrate appa. He’s touched their lives one way or the other.”

Jin gives a small nod, trying to keep his emotions in check. They may not have been related by blood or marriage–but he was always part of the family. “In any case, our family really, really appreciates it.”

Unprompted, Hobi moves in to give Jin a hug. He shakily accepts it, patting Hobi on the shoulder. “Thank you, brother,” Jin whispers before pulling away and walking off to check on Yoojung.

******

Eunhae steps into the kitchen in search of more napkins in the supply closet when she sees the backdoor ajar. She went to close it but stopped short when she saw Taehyung crouched on the stoop.

“Tae?”

His head jerks up at the sound of his name. “Oh…h-hey.”

“What are you doing here?” She asks. “Jungkook has been looking for you.”

He sighed. “I just wanted a little quiet before everyone got here,” he answers quietly then quickly gets up when sees her with the box of napkins in her hand.

“Hey–I can just get that,” he says, reaching for the napkins. “Why don’t you just chill out and get some food–”

“I don’t mind helping,” she smiled. “Yoojung-unnie needed an extra pair of hands so I offered.”

“I just don’t want you to think that we’re trying to put you to work or–”

She lays her hand on his wrist assuringly. “Taehyung,” she says firmly, “It’s alright. It’s like I said earlier when you called–I’m here for you.”

“I just…I feel really bad about all the stuff I said to you back at the hotel,” he says with regret.

That made the dull ache in Eunhae’s chest begin to move to the forefront but she’s able to push it back to the corner. Even though she wanted to talk to him about it too, this wasn’t the time nor the place. “Listen, why don’t we just get through today and if you’re feeling up to it, we can talk tomorrow? I was planning on driving back to the city tomorrow night.” Although Eunhae was allowed to do her work remotely, she still had to check into the office from time to time.

Taehyung gives a slight bob of his head. Eunhae gives him a polite smile in return. “C’mon, your noona’s asking for you.”

“Sure, I’ll be there in a sec,” he replies.

She turns to walk away but he calls out to her again. She turns around to face him.

“Thank you, Eunhae…for…” he sighed, seemingly at a loss for words. “...For everything.”

“You’re welcome.”

******

An hour-and-a-half into the reception, Namjoon steps to the front of the house to say a few words.

“Thank you, everyone, for coming. I think I speak on behalf of my mom, my siblings, and our respective partners and families,” he glances at Vee, who sat in one corner of the room, “...when I say that, my dad would have been touched knowing that you were all here to celebrate him.”

Then he chuckled. “I think he also would have found it funny that everyone would be fussing over him like this. He would have been the first to get up and tell everyone that we should just all go home, kick our shoes off and have a beer on the porch.”

There was a collective laugh that rang throughout the room.

He paused for a moment, eyes flicking downward to collect himself. Afterwards, he cleared his throat to continue. “It’s not traditional for us to do eulogies but…I’ve always thought that our family was never traditional in that sense anyway so, I don’t think the elders would mind if I read something.”

He opened the book that he clutched in his hand, where a passage was bookmarked. “This was one of the last things that I read to my dad. He and I loved to read together and have long conversations about whatever it was we just read. We’ve had some impassioned discussions and even epic debates that we settled by agreeing to disagree” he says with a chuckle. “But one thing’s for sure…” He paused again, feeling the tears creeping up. But he manages to hold back with a sniffle. 

“Anyway, this passage is from ‘I Want to Write, But I Don’t Want to Write:’

A cynical attitude extorts all creations. It would've been better if I was only cynical, but because I'm both warm and cynical, I either burn hot or shiver in cold or lose my energy while going back and forth between the cold and heat.

Because the words and movies I loved were colossal, the closer I get to them, the more limitlessly small and shabby I feel.

You eventually happen to avoid people that make you feel small. Be it your lover, friends or even parents. And then you will have to change your true self.

Just like how you have to acknowledge and get rid of your fantasies about love in order to keep loving. Because no existence or values can be absolutely beautiful.

If the set of values that kept my current self synchronized was in full effect, I have to dispose of those values and keep going by forming a new set of them. Otherwise I have to quit everything boldly and find something else to do.

But sadly, my ordinary self is just standing still, unable to do either of them. In the end, I find myself meaninglessly romantic and contradictory for being unable to give up what I have to give up and gave up on myself instead.

Even if it may not be reachable, I currently don't know any other way than just heading towards that place.

Namjoon shut the book and tucked it between his palms, then hugged it to his chest. His eyes roamed the room, finding that there wasn't a dry eye in the house.

He lets out a shaky breath, finishing with, “I know my dad would have thought it was far-fetched that anybody would miss him,” he paused, “But you all being here proves him wrong. The fact is that we miss you, dad…a lot.”

His mom rose from her seat, walked towards him to kiss him on the cheek.

******

“Are you driving back tonight?” Namjoon asks Vee while he walks her to her car.

“Hmm…I was thinking about it,” she replies..

Namjoon’s expression became uneasy. “The weather reports say it’s supposed to rain tonight.” Vee drove a Porsche 911 Turbo. It was a death trap for Namjoon but she loved her little speed demon.

“Would you mind staying another night? I’ll pay for the hotel,” he offered while eyeing her car worriedly.

She smiled warmly and appreciated his concern. He may not love her anymore but it was good to know that he still had love for her.

“If it makes you feel better, I’ll stay another night and leave in the morning. You don’t need to pay for it.”

He nodded in gratitude. “Thanks for being here and…you know, doing all that…” He referred to her acting like a dutiful wife, talking to relatives and neighbors as if everything was normal.

She nodded politely. “You’re welcome. You gave a beautiful sendoff.”

He chuckled. “I’m glad you thought so.”

“You’ve always had a way with words.” She smiled at him before stepping into her car.

He lingered there for a bit, watching while she plugged her keys into the ignition. Then, he stepped off the curb, knocking on the passenger window. “Vee?”

She rolls it down to hear him better.

“When I get settled in my new place…we should talk.”

Her jaw nearly drops with his offer. “Uhm…yes…yeah…” she stuttered. “That would be great.”

He nodded. “For the baby.”

She nods in return. “Of course.” On that hopeful note, she pulls out of her parking spot to drive back to the hotel.

Namjoon turned on his heel to walk back to the restaurant to help clean up. On the path there, he comes across Sam, who looked like he was on a very terse phone call.

Sam gave a quick head bob upon eye contact. Namjoon acknowledges him before he ducks indoors.

******

After the memorial, everyone returns to the house. Everything had been such a blur in the last few hours–it’s hard to believe that it wasn’t even dinner time yet. Everybody looked exhausted and parked themselves as far as their bodies would take them. Jin and Yoojung sat in the dining room, making coffee, while Namjoon made himself a pot of instant jjajangmyeon.

Taehyung was sprawled on the family room’s floor, with his best friend Jungkook, while both kids horsed around them.

Your mom, mostly stoic in the last two days, carefully trudged back upstairs to nurse a headache.

“YN, you want some?” Namjoon offered.

You decline absentmindedly, trying to search for Sam. He may have gone straight upstairs to lay down.

Just then, Joobin comes running towards you with his iPad. “Mommy, my iPad is dead,” he complains.

“Why don’t you plug it in by the corner, bud?” You point towards the little table where you’ve set up a device charging station for the kids.

“I tried but it won’t work. I think the wire is broken.” You let out an exasperated sigh. It didn’t matter which ‘braided’ or ‘angled’ charging cable you bought to make your life easier when it came to the kids’ devices. They always found new ways to break whatever was touted as the most durable material on the market.

“Okay, why don’t you stay here and play with Uncle Tae and Jungkookie and I’ll check to see if daddy will let you borrow his. Sound good?”

With a big smile, he runs off and jumps into Jungkook’s arms.

When you round the corner from the stairs’ landing, you call out to Sam.

“Hey, can I borrow a charging cable–

Sam looks startled when you come to view.

“What’s all this?” You ask, gesturing at his luggage.

He sighed uncomfortably. “I…I have to leave.”

“Leave? Now?” You ask through gritted teeth.

“Uh…soon,” he replies.

You turn your head away so quickly to take a breath, calming yourself so as not to completely lash out at him while in a full house.

You quietly shut the door behind you before hissing at him. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, right? When were you going to tell me?”

“I–” he stuttered. “Look, I just got the call earlier, a little after the reception ended. I was going to tell you once everyone was settled in.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose, reining in your annoyance. You were exhausted and weren’t in the mood for an argument but he was really making it difficult to make this into a reasonable discussion.

“My UK deal is falling apart and I have to fly over there to save it.” It was as if he hadn’t even considered what you and your family had just gone through. Your dad was dead and Sam was ready for ‘business as usual.’ As if he actually tried to pause while your dad slowly faded away.

You scoffed. “And you didn’t tell them that you were in mourning? Are your bosses so self-absorbed that a death in the family is a non-factor?”

“They didn’t force me, YN. I made the call.”

Your jaw drops. You knew Sam valued his work but you didn’t think he would choose it over family.

“My dad just fucking died and you’re leaving? Were you just counting down the hours?”

He let out an exasperated groan. “Of course not. I didn’t come to this decision lightly.”

“Bullshit,” you spat out. “I am barely hanging on here and all I need is a little bit of support from my husband! Is that too much to ask?”

“I was here for you…I…I am! I left a fucking business deal on the table so I could be here for you!”

“You mean locking yourself in a room to be on the phone for hours on end is what you call ‘being there for me’? Entertaining the kids a couple hours at a time before your next conference call is your way of supporting me?”

“I’m doing the best I can, YN. We’ve been here for over a week already–”

“When you asked me to marry you…you said you would be a provider of this family. I…I honestly didn’t expect you to go above and beyond that promise, but you did. And for that, I will be forever grateful. In return, I wanted you to be able to live out your ambitions. You were great at what you do. So, I made a home for you and our children…tried to make the best of this marriage. And you can’t say that I didn’t try…because I fucking did.”

You met Sam during a rough period in your life. You were just getting over Hobi, adjusting to your new job, and living with Namjoon until you found a place of your own. It was a scary, transition period and suddenly, here was this nice, handsome man, handing you your transit card that you just dropped.

You weren’t looking for anything serious. He was a good distraction at the time…until you fell pregnant.

It was such an inopportune time and you contemplated not going through with it but Sam convinced you otherwise. He confessed his love for you and promised to take good care of you.

He said as much when you took him back here to face your parents and your brothers. He asked your dad for permission to marry you, to which he agreed, appreciating the gesture.

Namjoon was less than thrilled.

It wasn’t the dream wedding your mom had envisioned for you when you were a little girl but it was intimate and lovely. Everyone who mattered in your life was there.

It was touch-and-go at first and Sam was very patient. Somehow, he managed to juggle a new wife, a new baby, and a demanding job without breaking a sweat. It was what made you love him even more.

And it was good for the first two years…until problems started cropping up. You don’t get your dream job without sacrificing a few things along the way.

It started with little fights about why dinner wasn’t ready yet, or why that vacation was getting canceled again. You stopped communicating because he was at work all the time and you’d be tired from working and caring for Joobin.

But you didn’t want this marriage to fail. You sought counseling for a few months and it actually helped. Things seemed better. In fact, things felt so much better, that you decided to have a second child.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t long after Jooni was born that the same cracks in your marriage became evident once more. At that point, you had your hands full with managing your household and two children. You didn’t have the bandwidth to manage your husband.

“And now? I’m tired, Sam.” Your shoulders slumped while you stared at him.

Sam’s eyes stayed glued to you. He opens his mouth to try to argue but he snaps it shut instead. It was pointless. It was a valiant effort on both your parts but this decision was a long-time coming. It seemed as though you were just waiting for the other to pull the trigger.

He put his hands on his waist and sighed in defeat. “Can I at least say goodbye to the kids?”

You nodded softly. “Of course.”

You eyed each other silently from across the room. Knees feeling weak, you feel the need to sit yourself down on the mattress. You sighed with your head in your hands.

You feel the side of the mattress dip while he takes a seat beside you. “We had a good run, didn’t we?”

“Yeah,” you sniffled. “Damn,” you shook your head warily.

******

After Sam left, you went into the backyard, tidying up the kids’ toys. You weren’t quite ready to explain all of the details to them yet, even as he hugged them goodbye. You and Sam agreed to sit them down when you were both back in the city and all legalities have been set in motion.

You were in the midst of picking up Joobin’s dinosaurs when you heard Taehyung offer to help.

“Oh, I’m fine,” you replied.

He took two strides closer to you. “You don’t sound like you’re fine.”

You gave him the most genuine smile you could muster. “Tae, I’m fine.”

“C’mon, noona. I know you.”

You scoffed, shaking your head and continued to pick up action figures, tossing them into a bucket. “You say that as if you’re some expert.”

“I’m an expert in you.”

You laughed as you walked away from him. “Really?”

“Of course. I mean…you practically raised me.” That stopped you dead in your tracks until he caught up to you.

“When I’m confused or lost or struggling with a decision, I think about what noona would do.” Then he smiled broadly. “And I do it and…things turn out fine.”

Each of you had your own style of ‘lecturing’ Taehyung. Your approach wasn’t nagging but you always left room for him to make his own decisions. You didn’t realize that he would take those to heart.

You bit into your lip to stop it from quivering. “Tae…”

“Would you be mad if I tried to give you some advice?”

You laughed softly and shook your head emphatically.

He leaned in and rested his hands on your shoulders. “I want you to know that it’s okay to be fine. And you deserve to be fine,” he says firmly.

Your eyes welled up at your little brother’s words of comfort. Even in the moment when you feel the whole weight of the world on your shoulders, your family was here to remind you that they were here to share the load.

“Now, c’mon. Hobi-hyung just invited the whole family to drinks at Hangsang!”

“W-wait–but my kids?”

Taehyung grinned. “Mom says she’s got it. She says you deserve a drink or two.”

You nodded then began to walk back up the porch and into the house.

You paused at the threshold. “So…what about you? Are you…fine?” You hadn’t really had a conversation after he locked himself up in his room for nearly a day. You were understandably worried.

Taehyung’s mouth curved into a smile. “I’m on my way there.”

You cupped his cheek and gave it a little pinch. “Is Eunhae coming to Hangsang?”

He laughed softly. “Yeah, she is. She…volunteered to be designated driver.”

You chuckled and lifted a shoulder. “Maybe you’ll get to ‘fine’ quicker than you think.”

◤Previous | Part 8◥  | Main Fic Masterlist

Thank you for reading!

If you loved it and/or curious to learn more, please comment, reblog, or send me feedback! 📩. I love hearing from readers! If you didn’t like it so much, I would still like to hear about it 💜

Tagging: @internetjunkdrawer @deepseavibez @itdoesntmatterwhy @joonschocochip @raplinesmoon @kokoandkookie @ayoo-bangtan @agentsofshields @playmetheclassics @serendididy @shesoldbutcute @yu-justme @e-cm @whoisbts

[sad-sweet-cowboah]

hi hi! love your writing and am so excited ur taking requests! i was hoping for a little Arthur and fem!reader nsfw action 😅

on the outskirts of camp, reader is eating a few raspberries after dinner and gets complimented by Arthur for help with the stew. she then teases him about getting dessert. they have to keep their banter quiet but reader knows what to say/do to make him sweat. but so does Arthur and they just threaten dirty things to each other, both trying to keep it together with others so close?

then she gets the final word by popping a berry into his mouth before sauntering smugly back to camp and leaving him there totally flustered? i basically just want them to suffer in a fun way 😂

The Mercy of Tease & Temptation

Warnings: This one is chock full of suggestiveness!

Word Count: 1,848

A/N: This one is shorter...but short and sweet and definitely a fun little tease. Hope you enjoy!

It seemed as if everyone in camp was in a better mood than normal tonight. 

The air was clear and warm, stars painted across the sky, dancing around the half-moon. The amber glow of the campfire cast across tent canvases and the trodden grass, smoke billowing into the cobalt expanse above.

Or perhaps it was the stew.

It was finally this particular night when Pearson finally allowed you to dabble with the so-called “recipe” he served day in and day out, or whatever it was he acquired from the Navy all those years ago. But you couldn’t imagine having such a limited supply of ingredients upon a ship, months out at sea. 

Meanwhile in your childhood, barefooted and rosy cheeks smeared with soil, you were often gathering wildflowers and herbs to dry and cook with on the homestead your family nestled in. Your mother, God rest her soul, taught you how to make even the simplest of meals taste like a delectable dish from the kitchens of Saint Denis, or at least how she described it. That’s where supposedly your grandparents were from, thus starting a tradition that passed down to your generation. 

Even when you yourself hadn’t experienced such a delight, you held those memories near and dear, and served to others whenever applicable. Cooking was your passion and you made a personal goal to share your love with others, whether it be in a glamorous city or just throwing a few ingredients together in camp. You were a few years into your outlaw life and Pearson held rule over the food stores. You hoped to weasel your way in the moment a spoonful of bland...mush...passed your lips. 

Sure, you contributed your fair share of meat to the coffer, subtly suggested adding some oregano or mushroom to liven up the tastebuds, but the old coot wasn’t having it. 

You don’t know what stars settled into alignment that made him change his mind, but he finally stepped back and allowed you to the pot. Now, it almost seemed as if the whole camp was in celebration. Some were helping themselves to seconds. Even Bill and surprisingly Micah were complimenting the taste in their roundabout ways. 

“Think you could cook like this every night?” Karen had asked after gathering her second helping. “Don’t think I could go back to eatin’ what it was before!” 

You had glanced over at Pearson when she said that, noting the look of poorly hidden irritation on his face. It may as well be the first and last time in the kitchen. 

But even Dutch himself seemed to be swayed by your masterpiece, sporting a huge grin beneath his moustache as he savored every spoonful. If you were lucky, maybe he’d “order” you to help Pearson from now on.  

Despite your own filling helping, enjoying the savory flavors aroused your sweet tooth afterward. You’d grabbed a handful of raspberries and settled on a log toward the edge of camp, watching from afar as everyone else eagerly finished the last of their meals. Popping a berry into your mouth, the sweet and tart medley danced on your tongue, washing away the last notes of your dinner. 

A flicker of movement caught your eye. Turning directly towards the source, a smile crept onto your lips as you saw who it was. Arthur, ever so large and lumbering, making his way toward you. 

“Hey sweetheart,” he greeted. 

“Hey there,” you responded, patting the empty space beside you. “Care to join me?” 

He did just that, settling himself down on the log, letting out a groan as he did so. “That stew was somethin’ else,” he sighed, leaning back to pat his stomach. “You sure you ain’t work at a restaurant before joinin’ us?” 

You giggled at this. “Arthur, I’ve told you before, I learned from my momma. Besides, you can take some credit too. You did help me.” 

You were no stranger to skirting through fields and wandering into forests for ingredients, especially by yourself. Arthur however insisted to accompany you for protection. It was unnecessary, but you did thoroughly enjoy his company. The knowledge he held about certain plants was welcomed as it made gathering much quicker than originally anticipated, turning what would have taken at least half the day into a few hours. 

Arthur chuckled himself, shaking his head in denial. “Nah, it’s all you, darlin’. I jus’ wanted to make sure you was safe.” 

“And made my job easier by gathering all the right ingredients,” you reminded him. “Don’t think anyone else coulda done it better.” 

A small smile appeared on his face, ducking his head in a telltale sign of the rarely shown softer side he possessed. It was much better than him immediately denying any sort of compliment towards him, which he often did early on in your relationship with him. 

“I reckon you’re the winner here,” he finally said, giving you a sidelong glance. “Ain’t ever seen anyone so happy to eat stew before.” 

“Just contributing in my own way,” you responded with a grin. “Momma used to get so excited watching everyone enjoy her cooking, might as well make the most of her knowledge.” 

“Then let's hope ol’ Pearson lets you back in after tonight,” Arthur chuckled once again, sitting up to cast his gaze across the camp, toward the man himself finally helping himself to a serving. 

“Maybe,” you shrugged, hoping he wasn’t too disgruntled after everyone clearly showing their preference. You placed another raspberry in your mouth and held another out to Arthur. “Care for dessert?” 

Arthur glanced at your hand and took one with a smile. “Surprised you ain’t make anything outta these.” 

“I could next time,” you said thoughtfully. “Nice raspberry pie sound good?” 

He hummed in response, his tongue flicking out to consume the berry. “Ain’t had a good pie in a while...love to taste yours.” 

While an innocent comment, you couldn’t help but to smirk. You and Arthur were not strangers to one another intimately. “That so?” you giggled lightly. “Well Arthur...my pie is always ready to eat.” 

He gave you a look of confusion, though it only took him a few seconds to understand your true meaning. He snorted and shook his head. “You serious?” he laughed. 

You grinned at him again. “You did say you’d love to...so why not?” you rested your hands on either side of you, arching your back and flipping your hair in a suggestive pose. 

Arthur looked you up and down. Even in the dimness of night, there was a certain gleam to his eye for the briefest of a second before he turned his head away. “We’re in camp, sweetheart...” he murmured, though failed to hide the interest in his voice. 

“Even better,” you said, reaching to trace your fingers along his arm. He tensed at your touch, prompting him to look back to you once again. Batting your eyelashes, your hand moved onto his thigh. 

There seemed to be a shift in his demeanor. His gaze locked to yours, eyes narrowing in thought, “You’re playin’ a dangerous game, ya know?” he spoke lowly. 

The tone in his voice nearly cast a shiver down your spine. “My favorite type,” you countered, giving his thigh a squeeze. 

He groaned at your touch, every muscle flexing before you. “If we wasn’t here—” 

“You’d do what, exactly?” you prompted him, your voice light and innocent. The hand on his thigh trailed up, tracing along his midline to the exposed triangle of skin on his chest. “Unless you wanted to...take me right here.” 

He huffed in response, like a green stallion, ready to burst with boundless energy. “Keep goin’ and I might,” he growled. 

A smirk painted your face, pleased with how easy it was to rile him up. “Oh, Mr. Morgan...how do you expect to do that? Surely that would attract some attention?” 

“Not ‘less I bind that pretty lil’ mouth of yours,” he rumbled. 

A vivid image flashed in your mind. The thought of his bandana wrapped around your face, tied up like a damsel while you were completely at his mercy. It was simply a fantasy; you hadn’t dared asking him to perform anything of the sort before, but damn did it make you...excited. 

“Keep me quiet, like you’re robbin’ me?” you quirked an eyebrow at him. “Take me like the big, bad outlaw you are?” 

A flicker of surprise crossed his face. “You don’t mean that, do ya?” 

“I do,” you whispered your confirmation, running your hand down his torso, tracing your finger along the cylindrical, cool metal of the bullets. “Always wanted to know what it was like, gettin' tied up by you...” 

As he took your words into consideration, a smirk slowly appeared across his face. “That make you feel some type o’ way, do it?” 

A hum rumbled in your chest as your palm idled along the handle of his side gun, purposely hovering close to a certain, sensitive spot of his body. “Like you won’t believe,” you speak in a honeyed voice. 

Arthur’s hand suddenly shot out, gripping your wrist with an almost painful force. You nearly reeled back in surprise, until he leaned close, his stare boring into your very soul. “Ya sure you want that?” he questioned slowly, his tone holding the same air of intimidation that made its presence during robberies. 

You sucked in a sharp breath of air. You never knew how much this could turn you on until this moment. The very idea of him taking you right here and now, upon this half-rotted log just out of earshot of the others, brought forth a new wave of pure need. The temptation to submit to him and let him use you to his advantage until you were a melted mess. 

A thousand ideas whipping through your head in whichever manner this could happen, and to execute it successfully to leave you both feeling satisfied. But...they were only ideas. And you were only playing as a tease. 

You smiled innocently at him as he stared you down in ever growing impatience for your response. As dastardly as his behavior was sometimes, he’d never hurt you, nor even attempt something without your consent. The next move weighed delicately on your response, a determination whether to unleash both of your pent-up need, or just let it fizzle out, leaving neither of you satisfied. 

With a grasp of clarity, you instead opted for a third route. There were two raspberries left in your hand, and you quickly popped one of the two into Arthur’s mouth. 

He made an oddly muffled sound, immediately releasing you and leaning back in surprise, nearly spitting the berry out in the process. His eyes betrayed both confusion and infuriation as he tried to collect himself again. 

You only smirked, popping the last berry into your mouth before standing up and beginning to saunter back into camp, swaying your hips as you did. You glanced over your shoulder and said to him, “I’ll be down by the water in an hour.” 

You’d be at his mercy soon enough. 

[kafkaoftherubble]

Idk if you particularly care about the Crunchyroll Anime Awards but voting opened yesterday (https://www.crunchyroll.com/animeawards/vote) and the nominees for some of the awards are so confusing.

With the amount of cool anime that came out last year I’m confused on why there’s a lack of diversity in the options. Look, I loved JJK S2, but why is it in nearly every category 😭. I’m also reluctant to let MAPPA get any kind of a win due the horrid scheduling conditions the animators were put under.

It just feels like the people that were deciding the nominees were like “Oh yeah CSM, Oshi no Ko, and Demon Slayer were pretty popular, just throw it in there!” Also didn’t the CSM anime come out and end in 2022, why is it here?

Also as a Hells Paradise manga fan, I’m confused on why the anime adaptation is even anywhere NEAR these awards. Best opening I understand, but it was a show that clearly suffered from MAPPA overwork and then taking on too many IPs. It’s just clogging up nominee spaces at this point.

Yo, I forgot that it's time for that Anime Award thing again! I remembered the Game Awards but not this, damn. SHould we vote too?

Oh yea, 2023 was such a banger.

I kinda expected JJK S2 to show up in a lot of categories, especially since I think for a lot of them, it does seem rather deserving to be there... even if it takes away the votes for other work. I think about it this way: is it fair to deny someone from being a candidate in a race even though they qualify, just because they are very popular? For now, I lean negative to this.

Of course! Deserving or not is a matter of subjective taste! To that, I am happy to concede, haha!

That said, since the Anime Award is a popularity award, I think voters like us should try to balance out the votes cast for JJK to mitigate the possible expense of other deserving anime.

I don't remember if Crunchyroll would show the percentage of votes for transparency purposes when the voting closes, but I think it's useful to do that. If JJK wins, we know it's because of its meteoric popularity, not because its competitors suck. Then we can see how, despite the competition, some anime managed to score a pretty startling number of votes.

I think focusing on the statistics cuts straight to the heart of acknowledgment and appreciation of an art form, even if it lacks the glory of actually winning the first prize. But hey, it's low-stakes stuff in the end. It ain't the general or presidential election, innit? 😂

If only we could do rank-choice voting...

---

I also do not understand why Chainsaw Man is here. I also thought it would not be counted because it was from last-last year.

I kinda think Oshi no Ko deserves to be around, though!

Demon Slayer... has been like a goddamn mainstay for years now, jesus. I'm gonna refrain from opining about it precisely because I don't enjoy Demon Slayer, so anything I say may be inseparable from this personal bias against the work, ahahhaha!

---

MAPPA taking so many projects shows another issue now that you mentioned it: it's taking up a lotta places with different projects too! If you don't want MAPPA to win, because you want to punish them for the way they treated their animators, your choices will become so much more limited. It's not a full-blown MAPPAのpoly yet, but there is a nascent emergence of it. Brrrrr.

Just taking up so many of the candidacies—via their surplus products—increases the probability of MAPPA emerging as the shadow victor no matter what anime won. Well, well, well. Slick move, MAPPA.

Anyway, I'm spitballing here, but...

I kinda think that it's high time awards minimize the brand of the studio and start amplifying the names of certain teams contributing to the art, like... the lead animators and the director. Ya know, "Director X and Their Team" instead of "MAPPA studio."

And award categories should really expand beyond genre or whatever the host makes up. Some of their categories even seem meaningless to me, like "best continuing series." What's there to celebrate about a long-running series? Why can't a series just compete with other series, regardless of how long it ran, as long as it's within that year?

Instead, wouldn't it be better if we create categories for "best animator" or "best scene" or, hey! There's an existing one! "Best Art Direction!" But instead of letting "Anime X, Studio Y" be the rep, we actually credit the name of the lead animators et al., and then the actual scene within the anime itself?

That way, even a show with fewer fans could still get recognized for that show's sick artistic achievements (if applicable), and the people behind it are at the forefront of said recognition. While we as fans can still shower credits to a big-production show—since it's got a lot of really good stuff—with minimal "accidental plaudits" to terrible studio execs.

I kinda... just think that if award shows are meant to celebrate and acknowledge the medium of anime, why not really cut to the heart of it?

Who are we celebrating for achievements, and for what?

---

I did not read Hell's Paradise as a manga, hee hee. Don't jump on me!

So, with nothing to compare, I liked the anime enough. I'm actually not bespoke about sakuga and composition and whatnot; I'm as unsophisticated as they come, ahahah! I love the monsters and the flowers and stuff!

I love the story and the philosophical mix between Buddhism and Daoism. It's so rad. I also really admire Sagirin! And I like Gabimaru too.

All these alone actually make me like the anime /scratches head

...Yea I'm shallow like that! HAHAHAHHAHAHA!

PLUTO WHERE YOU AT LEMME LAVISH YOU WITH VOTES YOU BETTER BE IN THERE

---

Oh, the length of this reply qualifies so...

Thank you for reading my ramble!

[fangirleaconmigo]

Hello my dear @marvagon ! As always it’s good to see you! Xoxo

So, there’s no denying that thicc Eskel is a fanon favorite. I discuss it here in my Eskel character analysis.

But casting someone slim isn’t in conflict with canon. Ostensibly, TWN is based on the books. I.e. they paid Sapko money to adapt his works. They did not pay CDPR money to adapt any of their unique additions to his works. TWN does drop in a lot of references and allusions to TW3, but they have to keep it vague. Because, while CDPR does not own the rights to witcher taking baths, handlebar mustaches on witcher mentors, or jokes about trolls, you can’t get too specific, or you have to pay them.

So, using the books as the canon basis (In theory. Roughly speaking) slim Eskel is not in conflict with canon. The books do not describe Eskel’s size directly. They say he looks like Geralt, but does not say in what way. His physical size is entirely up to interpretation. Any size is valid.

Now, full disclosure, you can count me as a thicc Eskel fan and truther. The reason for this is how he fills the doorway when Ciri sees him and how frightened she is. Eskel being frightening and off putting to a little girl purely due to his physical outward appearance is an important part of his character because when she learns that he is the gentlest, most respectful gentlemanly one, he subverts a lot of common tropes and stereotypes about visible extreme scarring, masculinity, and who gets to be a good guy in fantasy stories. And because Ciri is not (and never was) frightened of Geralt in the same way even though we know he is scarred (tho less visibly so), I like the ‘large Eskel’ head canon as it contributes more towards explaining her fear. So, he is always big and thicc in my fics.

HOWEVER that is all extrapolation and personal preference. There is no reason he has to be big. And these days when you say a character is big, Hollywood tends to take that as insanely muscular and these guys start dehydrating themselves and eating nothing but two thousand egg whites a day and it gets bad. I’d much rather have a character being written as slim, if the alternative is more actor dehydration and unrealistic body standards. You can still use that character to subvert expectations and to show Ciri not to judge books by their covers!

Basically, I was ready to love Basil’s Eskel. He would have been a different, younger Eskel, but he has a sweet quality to him that I thought could have made a wonderful version of Eskel. You can see that in their hallway scene.

Of course, I did end up fully loathing everything TWN did with and to Eskel but that wasn’t the actor’s fault, and had nothing to do with his size, but since you didn’t ask for a long bitter rant about Eskel and TWN S2, I’ll leave it at that. 😂😭

[allthingsfook]

Hi there - I'm wondering if I can get a ship please?

I am 5' 7", a little on the curvy side, long dark brown hair cut in a shag (I had it before Jake, so there). I have freckles everywhere and my eyes are green.

I love being out in nature - hiking, exploring, and just absorbing the stunning beauty of a variety of landscapes. At home, I'm typically curled on the couch though, learning about something that has caught my attention. My typical interests involve history and cultures. I'm a bookworm and usually can be found with either a book or laptop in my hands as I read constantly. I'm one of those people who can rattle off strange historical events. When I vacation, I love going to either national parks or cities for museums, parks, learning. I'm a plant mama and do garden when the time strikes. I love music. I can listen to anything from classical and opera to death core, and everything in between - with just a few exceptions. *cough, cough* pop *cough, cough*

I am a weirdo (meant lovingly) for long haired men who have confidence, but also are adventuresome. A man who is not limited by always having to look a certain way and can laugh at himself. I love to cook and bake with my partner - and cook huge for family and friends. Holidays would wipe the kitchen out for weeks!

I'm typically the quiet one in the group of friends, though my laugh can be mighty. I'm a bit shy, but can be counted on and have been know to be too loyal. I love quickly and deeply. I try to find joy in the little stuff always. I'm a family centered person, although most of my family right now happen to be found in friends as I live quite a distance from my family.

Thank you ahead of time! 😘

Howdy! You most definitely can get a ship!!! I’m sorry for not getting back to you promptly, but I hope that this ship will make it up to you and find you well!!!

Without further ado, I ship you with….

Sammy!

This was tough deciding between Jake or Sam, but my gut said Sam for various reasons. Let’s dive in!

First off, Sammy does not have a type! I think he’s in love with women as a whole and those who are more than what meets the eye grip him. I think Sam would swoon over your curves and emerald hue eyes.

One of the many things you and Sammy could enjoy together is basking in Mother Nature!!! He would always be game for getting out of the city to hike the hills and explore the country side. I can imagine Sam being extremely in touch and loving on those trips. Mostly because he is escaping from all the distractions of his career. He can bask in life’s beauty as well as yours! Sammy is definitely one to tell you that too! I can see the both of you spending the afternoon hiking in the hills with Rosie leading the way. You’d come to a break in the trees, leading out to a rock overlook. Extremely breathtaking. The both of you would stand in silence for a moment, until Sam breaks the silence and comments on how the view doesn’t compare to you. He’d then embrace you until Rosie barks with jealousy.

You’ll meet your match when it comes to diving into history and culture. I think we often forget how smart and inquisitive Sam is. He puts himself off as a goofball, which he is, but he’s much deeper than that. You’d be shocked by the knowledge he’d contribute to the conversation and fun facts he’d randomly blurt out of no where. Sammy is much like a sponge, always looking for an opportunity to learn and expand his mind. Sometimes it’s great and sometimes not 😂

The garden and house plants the both of you would care for would be both of your prides. Between the plants and Rosie, it’s like having kids!!!! It would make your morning to wake up to him hunched over dainty plants; pruning and carefully packing soil. He’d be so enveloped that he wouldn’t notice you standing in the doorway until you say good morning in a groggy voice. He’d startle and greet you with a warm hug and invite you to try some homegrown produce.

One statement that solidified the Sammy ship was your vast music taste with the exception for pop 😂 such a Sammy move. ALTHOUGH I think that’s a facade for him. I truly do think Sam loves select songs from every genre, it’s just a matter of finding one that resonates. Shockingly Sam might be the one that turns you on to a great pop song….. who knows!!!

And the mold you have created for your dream man, how well does Sam fit into that?

Long hair ✅

Confident and Adventurous ✅

A man that doesn’t take himself too seriously ✅

Someone who enjoys to cook/bake ✅

If you weren’t sold already, are you now? I mean no matter the style or length, Sam’s hair has always been beautiful, but I must say his current facial hair to hair length ratio is hitting different 🤌 Sam has such a secure outlook on himself. Not that he’s cocky… far from it, but he is so authentically himself and not ashamed of it. Building on that he’s always living! Sam is certainly a person who takes advantage of his time on earth and wants to leave nothing unwritten. How excited life would be with him 💕

As outgoing and theatrical Sam is, he certainly needs a little balance. No doubt you could be the source of that. Don’t get me wrong, I think you guys would compliment each other well. I think Sam sometimes might need a reminder to come home and take care of himself, and you may need a reminder to go on that impromptu trip you’ve always wanted to take.

Another key point that made me decide on Sam was the fact that you said you often love quickly and deeply. That screams Sam. He’s so sure of people and willing to find them a special part of his life. His love seems like a whirlwind experience. Though it might be chaos at times, it’s the most beautiful and pleasurable relationship you’d share.

I so hope you enjoyed the ship! As usual, pleaseee let me know what you thought and if it correlates to your lane (if you have one). I will also include a collage and song ship that reminds me of Sam!!!

[sorceress-queen]

Arthur x Morgana [ArMor]

This is actually inspired by my own writing 😂😅 and also by how much readers liked that particular piece sooo... . Which is a mood. 😉🥰

😬 This turned out a bit dark & sadistic and 😂 definitely feels like an AU piece with older ArMor. So a short summary:

Arthur finds the man who offended Morgana's honour at a different time and they deal with him together. Power couple™️. Also morbid/dark humour and a bit of torture & threats. And it turns smutty by the end 😳. So basically it has a bit of everything sprinkled in, or more like haphazardly thrown in as I let the characters in my head do whatever it is that they wanted to do. 😂 So it is a big ol' mess. But one borne out of love & fun. 💕

🐉

Morgana walks side by side with Lord Larris who offered to walk her back to her chambers; she politely declined his offer at first but his insistance & her lack of viable excuses have led to her having to accept it. She keeps her distance from him during their journey, counting down the steps in her head while he babbles on and on about some thing or another; she couldn't look more disinterested than she does.

And yet he has the audacity to try and kiss her when they reach the doors to her rooms after he mentions how much he enjoys being in her company (more like how much he enjoys his own company, given how little Morgana has contributed to their 'conversation').

She slaps him across the face after she pushes him back by his shoulders. "Leave," she hisses with a dangerous glint in her eyes as she reaches for the doorknob with one hand, while keeping her eyes on him lest he tries something again. And like the pig he is, Larris moves to press her against the door. "Fuck off," she growls and her knee very nearly collides with his crotch.

"You heard the lady." Arthur grunts as he grabs the man's collar and pulls him back, quickly examining Morgana for any harm to her person other than her hair being messed up and her dress having more creases.

"She was asking for it."

Those five words are enough to have Arthur slam the man against the opposite wall, which is a threat enough in itself but to add to that he has his sword drawn and pressed against the man's bobbing Adam's apple.

"I'd gladly take your life for that alone," he draws the man's blood with his sword; toying with the idea of running it through him. "But your tongue will do so that you may never speak to another lady like that ever again. " He puts his sword away and searches for his knife, only to find it missing.

"You didn't think I'd let you have all the fun did you?" Morgana dangles the knife as if it were a toy between her fingers and he can't help but smile at her at that.

"Of course not, my lady. I only wanted to rid him of the parts with which he has offended you." He takes her free hand in his and kisses her knuckles; almost forgetting about the squirming Lord beneath his strong grip.

"My champion," she says affectionately at his words. "If you were to rid him of all of the parts that offend me, you'd have to kill him." Morgana flicks the knife in her hand and pointedly stares at the man.

"Gladly," Arthur's response is instantenous, his hand reaching for his sword again.

"But alas his tongue will have to do." Morgana decides after some lamentation and watching the man's vain attempts to get away.

"Will you do the honours or shall I?" He asks while he grabs the man's jaw and forces his mouth open.

"I have a steadier hand than you do." She starts with a playful smile.

"Oh do you, Morgana?" He snorts.

"You know I do." She continues on. "Although, you might just make it more painful for him." She muses and taps the blade against her cheek.

"And slower." He adds and then shares a look with Morgana, loosening his grip on the man after their silent conversation, allowing him to break free.

"Do you think that taught him anything?" She asks as she slides his knife back in its place while he wraps his arms around her.

"I am not sure but I did tell the guards to not let him out of the castle after I caught a glimpse of him walking with you. I am glad I was able to reach your chambers in time." He squeezes her then and welcomes the way her body melts into his.

"You could have waited for a moment or two I was about to kick him in the loins." She chuckles as she buries her face in his neck.

"Ah, I thought I saw your knee swinging." He hums and guides her to her chambers, entering with her.

"So he'll be detained by the guards?" She asks Arthur as she sits down at her dressing table to unravel her long hair.

"Yes, he will be. And rest assured he will be dead by my hands come tomorrow evening." He makes an attempt to help her with her hair, the quicker it is done, the sooner he will have her in bed with him.

"You could just take his tongue," she leans her head back against the chair as she looks up at him. Arthur sighs and shakes his head, caressing her jawline as he leans over her. "I could, but it's too small a prize in exchange for what he could have done to you."

Morgana reaches for the hand on her jaw and kisses the palm of it finding no use in arguing with him over this, when she wishes the man dead too. "But I can still take it for you," he offers and she has to laugh at the image of Arthur on his knees in front of her with a severed tongue in his hands as a token of his affections.

"I don't have any need for his tongue, or any part of him." She giggles about it still while she takes care of her hair and Arthur watches her in contemplative silence with a smile on his face, happy that the night didn't end in a tragedy but with her laughing like that with him.

"Whose tongue do you have a need for then, my lady?" He jests as he moves to sit down on her bed, taking off his boots while she changes into one of her sleepwears behind a screen.

"Let me think." She winks at him after she has changed.

"Is that my shirt?" He quirks a brow as he pulls his mirthful Morgana into his lap. "It was your shirt." She corrects him and wraps her arms around his neck.

"I can still take it back." He playfully growls as he rolls her over on the bed; their chests pressing together as their breathing picks up with their excitement.

"Do it then." She purrs as she tangles her fingers in his hair and pulls him in for a kiss that leaves him breathless. "Morgana," he lets out and dives back in sliding a hand beneath his her white shirt.

"Yes, Arthur?" She asks back; and damn her for looking so put together even with her flushed cheeks and heaving chest.

"God have mercy," is all he manages to utter out while his hand travels higher and her breathing hitches in her throat in that cute way that makes him twitch in his breeches.

"I love you too," she responds and leans up to kiss him again and wrap her legs around him, only to flip them over and be the one on top. Arthur can't bring himself to flip them back as he now has the advantage to use both of his hands on her; determined to get Morgana to let out those cute little sounds of hers that are for his ears alone.

[msclaritea]

Directors, stop saying there's no CGI in your movies | Creative Bloq

"There was no CGI in Oppenheimer, right? Nor in Barbie. That's the impression that's been given about two of the biggest movies of the season. There's been a reaction against visual effects and it seems to have become something of a fashion for filmmakers to boast that they made their films the 'old-fashioned way'. 

It's perhaps understandable that, amid the explosion of AI image generation, the idea of making something without computer assistance is becoming attractive again. But it's not true, visual effects artists say. If Barbie used no CGI or VFX, why does the film have such a long list of visual effects artists in the credits? (and those are just the ones that got a credit).

This tweet is for @guardian and Shaad D'Souza: If you bothered to watch Barbie until the end credits you would have discovered that the film, which you claim has ‘almost no CGI or VFX’ has a credit list of 207 VFX artists and 5 VFX companies. Please also note that 3 out of the 5… pic.twitter.com/5bodtvGuPHAugust 3, 2023

The filmmaker and VFX supervisor Hugh Guerra wrote a post on Twitter in response to a Guardian article that was headlined '"It’s exactly as they’d have done it in the 1910s": how Barbenheimer is leading the anti-CGI backlash'. The article had commented on a spate of recent films using practical effects and prosthetics instead of CGI.

"If you bothered to watch Barbie until the end credits you would have discovered that the film which you claim has 'almost no CGI or VFX’ has a credit list of 207 VFX artists and 5 VFX companies." He said that three out of five companies listed had missing credits, so the complete number of artists would be longer. "Just like Oppenheimer and Mission Impossible, these films have hundreds of invisible VFX and CGI," he added.

Guerra's tweet provoked comments from VFX artists who worked on the film, including some who didn't get a name check in the credits. "People have no idea how broad the term 'VFX shot' is. There is no movie made today without VFX," one person replied. Someone else suggested "'Almost no CGI' tends to mean 'good CGI'. 'Almost no VFX' just doesn’t even really mean anything."

I watched it a few days ago, it's full of vfx 😂 The virtual production LED counts also as VFX, artists worked in Maya for the environment and I don't know how many used unreal 5. "Almost no CGI", really sad August 4, 2023

Some have suggested that it's a great compliment for the quality of the visual effects in the films if reviewers can't tell that they aren't real. However, others raise concerns that the so-called 'VFX-backlash' downplays the importance and contribution of VFX artists to film, which can provide an excuse to cut budgets, leading to poor VFX, which ends up being what people think VFX is.

"It's so sad to see how underappreciated VFX artists are. Especially since studios are being sucked dry and then when the effects are “subpar” they blame it on the artists without having any context," one person wrote. "VFX artists have given us some of the most iconic moments in cinema."

You all know how this started, don't you? It came from competing studios like Warner Bros Discovery just to use against Disney, as an attack on the quality, and an attempt to downgrade the value of superhero films...at least, the ones that came from Disney. Heaven forbid you find anything wrong in Snyderverse 🙄

The psychological effects to fans everywhere, to look forward to a film, only for a horde of corporate trolls online, tearing it apart, piece by piece is not fun, not cool and shouldn't even be legal. That damages a competitor's film in such a scummy way. I'll say again, it wasn't like that when I was younger. We could like what we wanted to. There weren't a bunch of raving lunatics trying to spoil a good time. As an aside, I'm sure the inevitable damage to the special effects industry was also a very big consideration.