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#don't you think it's funny how they tell us how to live. don't you think it's funny how we're all delinquent kids.
musaslullaby · 1 day
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Is the princess really getting married?
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Charles leclerc x fem reader
Summary: The Princess of Monaco is getting married, but the fans don't know who the lucky one is.
Face: people on Pinterest, and the driver.
Warning: fluff, Instagram AU.
A/N: There will be a second part.
Masterlist
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Ynofficial
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Description: Me every time they tell me I should go get ready.
Liked by user56, lewishaamilton, and other 948.983.
user43: Yn doesn’t want to be a princess anymore.
user32: Let’s switch places, girl. ❤️ Like to author
yourbrother: Yn, you shouldn’t post these things.
Ynofficial: Don’t be so strict.
yourbrother: I’m just trying to keep you on the right track.
Ynofficial: How boring.
user3: The best princess I’ve ever seen.
user12: This is too funny.
user34: POV: How to pretend not to be a princess.
❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: POV: It’s not a POV.
user34: YNNNN!!!!
Ynofficial: Yes, that’s my name.
yourbrother: What am I going to do with you? ❤️ Like to author
user78: What do you have to do today?
Ynofficial: Another one of those shoots for something, honestly, I don’t even know.
user23: Wait, you’re doing a photoshoot and you don’t even know what for?
Ynofficial: Exactly.
Ynofficial
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Description: At least I have him to keep me company.
Liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and other 8.483.939.
user45: How cuteeee.
user67: The luckiest little dog in the world.
user221: Yn doesn’t need a boyfriend; she has her dog.
❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: I totally agree.
yourbrother: He’s the only one who deserves to live in the palace.
Ynofficial: I know you love my son more than me, thanks.
yourbrother: I never said that.
Ynofficial: So, you love me?
yourbrother: You trapped me. ❤️ Like to author
user21: The last photo is worthy of a queen.
user34: Maybe you meant goddess?
user56: Guys, doesn’t that dog look like Leclerc’s dog?
user7: Who’s Leclerc?
f1lover: How can you not know? He’s a god on earth.
user90: He’s an F1 driver who has a dog of the same breed named Leo.
user50: Now that I think about it, they adopted them around the same time.
user54: Coincidence?
Ynofficial
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Description: Okay, okay, I have to admit I had fun this time.
Liked by user43, checoperez, and other 98,453.
yourbrother: I told you.
Ynofficial: You usually tell a lot of lies.
user45: I love the relationship between Yn and her brother.
❤️ Like to author
user6: The heir to the Monaco throne.
user7: He’s very kind, I met him.
Ynofficial: Try living with him, then we’ll see.
user21: Were the jewels real?
Ynofficial: Yes, and they’re really heavy too.
user6: I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes.
Ynofficial: The clothes are super uncomfortable tooooo.
user67: But they’re beautiful.
user0: They look amazing on her.
Ynofficial: I can’t wait to take them off.
Ynofficial
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Description: A date before saying goodbye.
Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 4.784.839.
user21: Who are you with, girl?
Ynofficial: With a human being.
user6: The luckiest human in the world. ❤️ Like to author
user5: YN OF MONACO WHAT ARE YOU DOING??
user34: Thank you, Yn.
user1: Whoever it is should thank their lucky stars every day to be with someone like Yn.
❤️ Like to author
user45: So, is she engaged??
user41: Yn, don’t play these tricks on us.
user67: It’s not funny.
user3: I love the dress.
Ynofficial: I don’t, they forced me to wear it.
user56: No way we could afford it.
user32: I wish I were a princess.
Ynofficial: Wish granted, please come take my place.
user6: Guys, isn’t the Monaco GP today?
user5: Oh God, you’re right.
user43: Do you think she’s going to the GP?
user8: I didn’t know she was into F1.
user09: Neither did I.
user5: Yn is the black sheep of the family.
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Ynofficial: You’re absolutely right.
user56: That description doesn’t sound like you.
❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: Sorry, too poetic.
yourbrother: Mom wants to talk to you.
user6: Trouble’s coming.
Ynofficial: Time to run off to Mexico. Checo, will you host me?
checoperez: Whenever you want. ❤️ Like to author
user32: Wait, they know each other???
user9: Did I miss something?
user78: What does this dialogue even mean?
user76: YN?
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Ynofficial
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Description: Guess who’s not supposed to be wandering around the paddock?
Liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and other 877.473.738.
gp1: YN OF MONACO.
vroom: Wait, they allowed her to go to the GP??
race: I think at least someone from the royal family always has to be there?
user43: YN, DID YOU MEET CHARLES?
Ynofficial: 🤫🤫.
16_55: IT’S A YESSS.
user2: MY TWO FAVORITE PEOPLE MEETING. ❤️ Like to author
yourbrother: Where did you go? Mom’s going to be very angry.
Ynofficial: Cover for me.
yourbrother: Wait, what?
Ynofficial: Thanks, love you.
yourbrother: No, Yn, come back here, we agreed to stay low-key.
Ynofficial: No one will see me.
yourbrother: That includes me too, right?
Ynofficial: Maybe yes, maybe no.
63_: I love this woman.
user42: Is the car comfortable?
Ynofficial: My princess ass didn’t appreciate it.
user21_: That’s why you’re my favorite princess.
Ynofficial: I don’t think you know any others.
danielricciardo: Princess Yn is a fan of mine.
Ynofficial: You’re my childhood.
danielricciardo: I’m not that old.
Ynofficial: Don’t worry, Daniel, it’s hard to accept.
landonorris: Wait, Daniel met her and I didn’t?
maxverstappen1: He’s just privileged.
Ynofficial: I’m coming to you, don’t fight.
user98: Everyone wants Yn. ❤️ Like to author
81_4: She’s anything but a princess.
f1lover: Please marry me.
Ynofficial: Sorry, I’m a bit busy.
Ynofficial
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Description: As a good princess, I have to congratulate Charles Leclerc for winning his home race, Monaco. Congratulations, Predestined One.
Liked by charles_leclerc, f1, and other 42.457.473
f1lover: How sweet, Yn.
ferrarifan: After this post, I’m over the moon.
race_: The Monaco curse is broken.
❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: Yes, but now Charles has to endure at least a month of bad luck.
charles_leclerc: Thank you, Yn. ❤️ Like to author
charles_leclerc: I thank you, Your Highness, for wasting two minutes to make the post. ❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: Consider yourself lucky.
landonorris: Will the next victory post be dedicated to me?
georgerussell63: Keep dreaming, mate. ❤️ Like to author
oscarpiastri: Charles has reached the pinnacle of his career after this post.
carlossainz55: I can hear him laughing and blushing from here. ❤️ Like to author
maxverstappen1: Princess, may I humbly request your attention? ❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: I always have my full attention on you, Max Emilian Verstappen.
charles_leclerc: No, today is my day, step aside. ❤️ Like to author
user56: Is Charles jealous??
user45: Max asking for Yn’s attention?
Ynofficial
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Description: I can officially say I’m off-limits.
Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 98,457.633.
yourbrother: I’m so happy for you, little sister.
❤️ Like to author
landonorris: Can I be the best man?
Ynofficial: No, you might show up to the wedding already drunk.
maxverstappen1: You said yesss! ❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: I said yesss!
georgerussell63: Congratulations, guys.
❤️ Like to author
lewishamilton: Congrats, but honestly, I expected it.
❤️ Like to author
oscarpiastri: He has the eyes of love.
❤️ Like to author
user44: No, okay, we need to figure out who it is.
f1lover: It’ll be the most beautiful wedding ever.
ynlove: Our little girl is growing up.
charleslec_: I hope it’s Charles.
race: It’s definitely a driver.
vroom: I don’t know; it could also be a prince or noble.
user32: I doubt it, knowing Yn.
ynqueen: Love is blind.
user3: Whoever it is, I’m so happy for you.
user77: I’m going to drop a bomb: I think it’s Max.
maxie_: Oh God, yes, can you imagine??
1_11: The best couple ever.
Ynofficial: I like your theories.
user66: Yn, help us, please.
cl16: Has anyone noticed Charles didn’t even comment?
55_: Strange.
Ynofficial
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Description: Goodbye, Monaco.
Liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, and other 757.648.
yourbrother: I can’t believe mom let you go.
carlossainz55: Knowing Yn, she would’ve gone anyway. ❤️ Like to author
Ynofficial: My friends know me too well.
user43: Wait, how long have they known each other???
formula1_: More importantly, since when does Yn love F1?
f1lover: It’s a new thing, actually.
race: Yn, princess of the people.
Ynofficial: Always at your service.
landonorris: Now she’s getting a big head.
charles_leclerc: As soon as they offered you to skip your duties, you accepted right away.
Ynofficial: You shouldn’t talk to a princess like that.
charles_leclerc: And you shouldn’t talk to a prince like that.
f1love: WAIT, WHAT DID CHARLES MEAN???
charlesmylife: Guys, Yn deleted it.
charelsofmonaco: No, I don’t understand.
16cl: I arrived too late 😭😭😭.
Flove1: Finally, we have proof that this man exists.
user65: I was convinced it was a joke.
user90: Secret agents of the world, unite, we need to find out who Yn’s boyfriend is.
user67: YN, WE HAVE TOO MANY QUESTIONS.
Ynofficial: And I have zero answers.
user56: Where are you running to, girl?
Ynofficial: Away from nobility.
Ynofficial
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Description: I had to try the ice cream in Italy.
Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 74.673.883.
yourbrother: Bring me some.
Ynofficial: No.
charles_leclerc: I’ll bring it to you.
Ynofficial: Since when are you two so chummy?
f1lover: No okay, we missed something.
race: Something important.
Formula1: Is that Leo or Yn’s dog?
f_1: The numbers don’t add up.
user78: I can’t tell them apart.
user1: They look the same.
landonorris: Good job, Yn, distract him so I can win in Monza.
carlossainz55: NO, YN, BRING CHARLES HERE NOW.
Ynofficial: Now I don’t know what to do anymore.
user56: Yn is a princess even outside of Monaco.
user09: How cute is the guy tying her shoes?
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tsukii0002 · 2 days
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Imagine the contrast of the coexistence between Mc and Solomon, a human who did not know that magic was real until relatively recently and another human who has lived for centuries and who uses magic as if it were breathing.
Imagine that little things at home where Solomon is always willing to use magic to solve it, while Mc always beats him to it in the most common and least magical way possible.
But above all imagine, Solomon's frustration, how can his magic be rendered useless in such a way? And if he has no magic, what can he bring to that home?
Solomon: Remember that blanket I told you had a hole in it, I think it's time to mend it *opening one of his books*
Mc: I've already mended it, with a few stitches it's as good as new.
Solomon: Oh…
Solomon: Mc, what was the table that was broken?
Mc: Oh, don't worry, I fixed it.
Solomon: Really? What spell did you use?
Mc: Ha, ha, Solomon, you don't need magic to wedge a table.
Solomon: Mc!! With this spell we will solve our rat problem!
Mc: *smiling* I've already taken care of that, no for nothing Barbatos is so happy with me.
Solomon: That's how you earn your premium tea leaves?
Solomon: Please tell me you didn't fix the shelf that was sagging *with a book under his arm*
Mc: *eating a muffin* Oops.
Solomon: Mc, I told you I'd fix it *pointing at the. with the book*
Mc: Solomon, it was tightening two screws, it's going to take you longer to look up such a mundane spell than to fix it manually.
.
Solomon: Mc… you're a sorceress, you should use magic more!
Mc: *funny* And you should use magic less!!! You're still a human, old man. By the way, remember those yellow spots on the tablecloth that bothered you so much?
Solomon: Yeah?
Mc: Well, I've already made them disappear and without magic.
Solomon: How????
Solomon is sitting, somewhat annoyed, on one of the balconies
Mc: Hey…
Solomon: …
Mc: Are you upset?
Solomon: … No.
Mc: *sighing as they stands next to him* Let's talk, tell me, why does it bother you so much that I solve things without magic?
Solomon: I'm not upset, we don't need to talk at all.
Mc: You know that communication is part of living together right? We are two people with different ways of living, if we don't talk how are we going to have a good cohabitation?
Solomon: … With the brothers you never had that problem.
Mc: Sure I have, maybe not with these things because Lucifer encourages certain stuff to be done manually, but we had to set a lot of guidelines when I started living with them.
Solomon: ...
Solomon: *sighing* I'm not upset… it's just that I'm used to doing everything with magic, even the smallest things, it's easier, faster.
Mc: Well, sometimes yes, but sometimes it's easier to do it without magic, and in my case I'm used to not use magic.
Solomon: *looking at them* I know, but there are things I can't do without magic.
Mc: But that's what I'm for, isn't it?
Solomon: *doubting* Then' what do I bring to our cohabitation?
Mc: *realizing*
Solomon: You cook, you do a lot of chores because you are faster, and you take care of a lot of things that allow you to have a routine… I feel that instead of living together, I am a guest...
Mc: Solomon...
Solomon: And if I can't even use my magic, Am I useless? without my magic I…
The two are silent for a moment
Mc: I'm sorry, I've minimized how you feel… and I've done things my way without taking you into account.
Solomon: Ha, ha, don't worry, *now kind of sad* It's not that big of a deal.
Mc: No, I told you, communication is part of living together and you should tell me what bothers you.
Solomon: *looking at them*
Mc: We can try to find a middle ground.
Solomon: How?
Mc: *thoughtful* Well, the day to day things we can do manually and the things that are very difficult or tedious we can use magic?
Solomon: *considering it seriously'* You could also teach me how to do tasks without magic, like how to wedge a table… and I could teach you spells that I usually use, like the one that sweeps the house by itself.
Mc: *smiling* We can also make a schedule so we don't step on each other's to-dos.
Solomon: *smiling too* And create a chat room exclusively for house stuff where we can let each other know if we're going to do something.
Mc: That sounds like a great idea Solomon.
Solomon: *more lively* And I'd also like to do certain chores together, like laundry or cooking.
Mc: … *feeling bad at Solomon's happy face* Yes… we can do that too.
.
.
This turned out to be longer than I thought, and what started as something funny has turned into a drama😅. I'm not going to lie to you, I love domestic dramas, day to day problems… so this post has turned into that because Solomon is used to live in a very different way than Mc, and living together for the first time is always complicated and habits are hard to change, and co-living is not always so great. Give me domestic situations between Mc and the rest of the cast please!!!! 🥺🥺
Anyway, if you've made it this far, thank you very much for reading🩷
.
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fivelila · 3 days
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Okay, people may not like Five and Lila as a couple, I get it… but what I find absolutely hilarious are posts like "oh, look what they took from us" about Lila… or "Five from S1-S3 will always be a famouse" and I'm like wtf!? 🤣
Why do these people like Five or Lila? Because he's an old man in a young body who can kill a room full of people in a few minutes? Or because Lila is a sexy rebel who does messy things? Nothing deeper?
Did we watch the same show? Cause I have a feeling we didn't.
Five never wanted to be an assassin, yes, he wanted to save his family, he wanted to save the world from the apocalypse (but that doesn't mean it was a hobby he actually enjoyed doing, he just had to) - it does not make up his whole personality. Have you noticed how frustrated he is and how he wants to be at peace and finally get some rest? No? It wasn't interesting enough, was it? The guy lived one huge trauma, the fact that he was sarcastic and obnoxious most of the time might have been "funny" but it's actually rather sad that he spent most of his life training for the UA, then was alone for forty years and then had to become a killer. Haha, he must have enjoyed life, huh?
And Lila had been under the influence of the Handler for most of her life, and in fact you could see that she was afraid of her. She herself said she was a coward, she was afraid of telling the truth, which would make her weaker, she was the one who wanted the family she didn't have (and yes, all of this was back in season three). So why are some people so shocked about S4 Lila? Among other things: you don't think a woman changes in any way after 13 years? Or did you expect her to act like a crazy teenager at 40+? Or what exactly did you expect her to do?
I think Lila could have easily been childless, but then I don't think she and Diego would have been a couple at all after a six years. Because they got back together mostly because she was pregnant. Other than that, their relationship was just based on deception and their physical attraction. Well, unfortunately, that's not something you can build a long-term relationship on in real life.
Just because some people don't like it doesn't mean it doesn't make sense.
But I understand, here most people don't care about the realism of real life, where people change their attitudes, where there is a dysfunctional relationship, where the characters want a real life… just fun and nothing deeper… okay...
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cuecrynsleep · 3 days
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Reconnecting the Past
Amangela | Reunion AU!
Chapter 15: Routinely Calls
Amanda and Angela start to fall into a routine with Amanda later texting Shayne about news.
Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a representation of those in Smosh, rather a fan made perspective on the characters they portray online. Remain respectful.
← Ch. 14 | Masterlist
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"Okay I am starting the car," Angela, all but announced the moment the call connected.
"Thank you for the play by play Angela," Amanda teased. "I really needed it."
"Well, I don't know what else to say," she uttered. Shuffling was heard over the speaker, a light beeping noise coming from Angela's car as she presumably reversed out of her driveway. "What are you up to, anyway? It's early."
"I'm doing my hair. I finished getting dressed and my makeup earlier." Amanda said, her phone set down on the sink counter as she brushed through her long hair a final time.
"What the?" Angela said. "You're already ready? Doesn't your thing start at like 9?"
"Yeah, but it's fine. Tommy and I will probably arrive early," Amanda shrugged. She gathered up her stuff, checking through her bag a final time. "I'm used to waking up early for this, so might as well."
"I think you're just insane," Angela commented. "I understand getting ready early, but you know you can just stay behind in your hotel and watch TV."
"It feels awkward to do when I have filming today," Amanda said, her phone to her ear and off speaker as she made her way to the elevator. "I like leaving stuff like that for after work."
There was a brief pause before Angela spoke. "Oh, I get that. I feel like it's easier to start doing stuff like that in your downtime once you have a better work and personal life balance."
"True," Amanda commented. "I'll be better at it once I'm back in California."
"Sometimes I forget you do still live there," Angela admitted. "Like we started talking again and then suddenly you're in Canada."
Amanda texted Tommy as another person entered the elevator, she shuffled deeper into the corner, her voice softer as she spoke. "Well I'm bound to be back there within July," she paused. "Hopefully."
"Tell your work they suck at scheduling," Angela teased.
"Trust me, they know."
"How's filming nowadays?" Angela asked.
Amanda couldn't stop herself from sighing. "It's fine all things considered." She ended up leaving it at that, waiting for Angela to either comment or change the topic.
"Jesus Christ," Angela mumbled, her voice still clearly heard despite that not being her intention. "There's way too many cars here."
"You're driving in LA, Ange. That's a given." Amanda replied, as she navigated her way through a busy hotel lobby. She initially planned on waiting in one of the chairs but based on the multiple people checking in and out, she decided to cut her losses.
There was another pause, a brief car honk heard in the background. "Are you outside already?" Angela asked. "You really want to get there early."
"Oh, quiet," Amanda rolled her eyes. "What are you up to nowadays?"
"Well, you know, filming for the second short film and the improv group. The usual," Angela said. "I am getting closer to the people in the improv group though, so I'm happy for that."
"I'm glad, it's always good to make friends or at least colleagues in stuff like that."
As minutes passed by Amanda waited for Tommy to join her out in the front. The uber already ordered for the two five minutes ago. Throughout the call Angela ended up rambling about this one improv scene she absolutely loved doing. As Amanda listened, the corners of her mouth twitched upwards into an uncontrollable smile. She sucked her lips into her teeth, simply enjoying the moment.
There was just something about listening to Angela ramble about something she loved that was comforting. Her glances at the road waiting for the Uber to arrive becoming less frequent. As she let herself be lulled into a story about an admittedly funny scene, she failed to notice the door opening and the approaching footsteps.
"Who has you smiling at your phone like that?" Amanda heard Tommy's teasing voice, a hand on her shoulder bringing her back to the present.
"Oh my god!" Amanda practically yelped, unintentionally interrupting Angela. She turned towards Tommy immediately. "I did not see you coming."
Tommy chuckled. "Yeah," he said. "I can see that."
Angela's voice is quietly heard over the phone. Amanda isn't even sure if Tommy can hear her. "Amanda? You good? Mandy?"
"So," Tommy said, he pointed to her phone. "A friend? Boyfriend? Hookup?"
"The first one," Amanda said, just about to reply to Angela.
"You'll be busy soon. I'm going to be hanging up now." Another quiet shuffle is heard. "Good luck in filming."
Angela left the call, Amanda being left by herself before she clicked off. "Well, I was going to introduce you two, but guess not." She checked the time, failing to realize how much time had passed. "Then again she does have to get to filming soon.”
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Note
Isn't it hilarious how if the askers (yes, including me. I admit it) lived in the same universe as Alex and them that Alex would just LITERALLY have a fucking blood and gore bank 24/7 with how many of us are willing to just be EATEN BY VAMPIRES-
(Not saying ALL the askers are, but there's a few of us-)
It's funny because i wouldn't even go to getting eaten at first, I'd just die because I have no sense of self-preservation and would continuously hug him.
( yes, this is the same person who keeps bringing up hugging him. and the one who screams with art updates. can't you tell I'm very normal? haha- :D anyways, that point aside it internally makes me giggle that most of the askers are just A-OK with being eaten- )
I am 100% unsurprised by how down bad everyone has been for vampire Alex seing as this is Tumblr, the gay weirdo website. If you guys were canon he would never have to worry about hunting ever again but he probably would have to worry about an army of freakazoids nipping at his heels. Jay is already a lot to handle lol.
And don't worry, I recognize you by now. I see that pfp and I think, ah, it's the screamer :)
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Note
i hope you're having a lovely day, blusy!!
can you write about donna and reader having drunk sex and donna was so wild that night that angie, who was sleeping in the room next door, was traumatized. she complained about it the next day but the two can't remember anything because of how drunk they were. and basically reader and donna tried to make up to her by showering her with gifts and doing anything she requests them to do.
angie thought that was the end of it but they did it again the next day 😭 can you make the making-up-to-angie part fluffy? i love your works!!
Yesss!!!! Thank you for your kindness and for your request!!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :))))))
Angie's revenge
Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader
Warnings: Mentions of explicit smut, Minors DNI, alcohol, fluff
Word count: 7,332
Summary: Maybe to drink that liquor wasn't a good idea...
N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!! I love you all!!! :))
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“I'm afraid you'll have to be a little more specific…” the Duke murmured with that arrogant, third-rate merchant voice.
“If I had a clear idea I wouldn't be asking you, would I?” you said, always watching the door to avoid prying eyes behind it.
“You said you wanted something special and that is a very… abstract concept,” the merchant said with a smug smile.
“Mm, I'm sure what you want is information,” you whispered with a confident look, crossing your arms.
“Information? No, Miss, how can you think something like that?” the Duke said, shaking his head but not removing that horrible smile from his horrible face.
You sighed, rolling your eyes without stopping looking around.
“Okay,” you said, defeated, lowering the tone of your voice. “Tonight marks one year since I've been living with Donna and I wanted to celebrate it with a special dinner,” you explained with an angry hiss.
 Of course, giving information about your private life to that man was the last thing you wanted to do at that moment.
“Oh, a romantic dinner?” the Duke asked, arching his eyebrows unpleasantly.
“No, it's a dinner to look into our eyes and tell us how much we hate each other,” you said ironically, shaking your head. “Of course it's a romantic dinner.”
The Duke laughed scandalously, satisfied with your embarrassment.
“I've always valued people who master the subtle art of sarcasm,” he commented, with a curious look. “It's not very common around here.”
“Yeah, okay, great,” you growled, clenching your fists. “Well, if you value it that much, please help me.”
“I still don't know what you're looking for,” he repeated, with a dark look of satisfaction.
“You know what? I was planning on spending a lot of lei, but I think some nice words will do the trick,” you said in a cocky tone, taking the rest of the order and walking towards the entrance.
“Words are carried away by the wind, Miss (Y/N),” the Duke intervened, visibly nervous, as always when money was mentioned.
“Yes, yes, you can’t be. You can rest assured,” you joked in a disinterested way.
“You're so funny,” the merchant said, laughing. “It’s a pity because I just remembered that I had something special around here.”
“You'd sell your mother for a handful of coins,” you grumbled, leaving the boxes back on the floor.
“Mother? Well, I can't say if your statement is correct since I don't remember if I ever had a mother,” the Duke said, rummaging through his carriage. “Let's see...”
“Something special,” you said with an impatient voice, looking at the old clock in the hall. It wasn't long before Donna came up from the workshop, you'd have to be quick.
“Something special,” the fat man repeated, grabbing a bottle. “I think this is what you’re looking for,” he said finally, extending that bottle with a yellow liquid.
You frowned and took the object, moving it to agitate the liquid inside.
“What is this?” you asked curiously, removing the cork from the bottle and bringing it to your nose. “Lemonade?”
“Not exactly, Miss,” the Duke said, raising and lowering his eyebrows. “Smell it.”
“Ugh,” you said wrinkling your nose when the alcohol traveled through your airways. “Liquor”
“Not just any liquor, dear,” the merchant murmured, moving in the carriage. “Limoncello.”
“Lemon what?” you asked, covering up that pleasant smell again.
“It's a traditional Italian lemon-based liquor, it was Mister Beneviento's favorite,” he commented, watching satisfied as you nodded slowly. “I think it's perfect to make that dinner… A little more special.”
“Yes, maybe,” you said with a murmur. Well, at least it was something. “See how it wasn't that difficult?” you joked, throwing that greedy being another bag of coins.
“If it was difficult for me to do business, I would have dedicated myself to something different, don't you think?” the Duke laughed, amused, counting the coins.
“I don't intend to thank you,” you said with a cocky voice. “Seriously, why do you want so much money?”
“I like money,” the man answered, amused.
“Yeah, okay, great, great...” you murmured, shaking your head and turning slowly. “Well, you can go now.”
“One last thing, Miss...” he commented as he turned the carriage, bringing his eyes to the bottle of liquor. “Be very careful with that, don't drink too much...”
“Yes, yes, yes…” you sighed, nodding reluctantly and entering the mansion, ignoring the merchant's sinister laughter. “Damn, I'm starting to think that Donna only wants me to negotiate with this vermin.”
“Don't say that, tesoro,” a hoarse voice interrupted your stammering and protests. The lady in black was waiting standing in front of you. As always when she appeared, your lips could only smile.
“Oh, Donna, don't look, don't look,” you said, hiding the bottle and walking towards her, comically covering her eye as you walked. “That's it… Straight ahead, watch out for the door,” you said amused, guiding the blind lady towards the hallway.
“What are you up to, (Y/N)?” she asked amused.
You put on your best innocent face and shrugged.
“Nothing, nothing…” you said amused, putting the bottle in one of the boxes and picking them up from the floor. “I'll go to put the groceries in the kitchen… Wait for me here.”
The lady in black laughed shyly as she watched you with that face you fell in love with, that beautiful and wounded face that for you, was the most beautiful.
They always told you that time passed quickly, without mercy, without letting you enjoy every moment. You never believed it.
You thought that time was just a transit, something that had no remedy, that became slow and lazy to make you feel even more sadness and apathy. They were right. A year used to be long. It used to take its time to pass before your eyes but… That year, that precise year, passed like a shooting star.
You were never anyone special, daughter of farmers, devotee of the Black Gods and Mother Miranda (you didn’t have another option either). Your life passed slowly, showing you the darkest side of it, the desperation of not being understood, the construction of your friends' lives, something you couldn’t do.
You had different interests. Marrying a lout and starting a family was certainly not among your priorities. You just wanted to find someone with whom you could share your disagreement with the established order, someone who, like you, didn’t see life as a gift from the Black Gods, but as a slow and tedious sentence.
But one day, the day when your clumsiness made you stumble upon the worst possible person, that day, you wished time would stop.
You were not alien to the Lords, or to Mother Miranda. They were shadows that lived with the villagers as a potential and imminent danger, even though the witch assured that they were only there to take care of you. You never believed that nonsense, you knew that the danger resided in each of the four Lords.
That woman you stumbled upon was one of them, the youngest, the most mysterious Lord, the ventriloquist, the doll maker, Donna Beneviento.
No one knew much about that woman, many even refused to look at her as a human being, it was rumored that beneath that dress, that black veil, there was a monster, a monster on the outside and on the inside. Suffering from mental illness since birth, Lady Beneviento became an even darker shadow, one that could hide the brightest sun.
With everything in your mind, your legs began to shake and you started to think that just getting in her way would mean an eternity of suffering. It wasn't like that.
Your innocent smile and the wit you were blessed with caught her attention enough to not want to kill you. She wasn't the only one who saw something in you, you did too.
A soul mate, destiny… You couldn't really say why during a conversation your lips met, why that veil disappeared to reveal the true meaning of beauty, of love.
It had been a year since that kiss turned life into something wonderful for you. You stopped being the simple (Y/N) to live with her in that incredible, secluded mansion.
Living with Donna (and Angie) was a challenge that you overcame little by little. Her shadows, her torments played with your feelings but you never cared, you would always take care of her, and she of you.
There was no monster under the black cloth, but a beautiful and tender woman, dangerous but loving, an incredible woman who little by little became the woman of your life.
That night was definitely special, it was the celebration of that year with her, of the time you had spent loving her more and more each day.
“More wine, tesoro?” the lady in black asked, romantically illuminated by the candlelight. You nodded pleased, extending your glass towards the lady.
“Everything was delicious, Donna,” you sighed grateful for that special dinner. She looked at you and smiled sheepishly, shaking her head.
“There's no need to be accommodating, (Y/N), you tell me that every night,” she whispered, sighing almost as if it were your first date.
“Oh, well…” you joked, arching your eyebrows. “I guess it's already a habit.”
“I, I can't believe you've been with me for a year,” the lady commented, with a slightly sadder look, with the shadows of her demons surrounding her like merciless crows. “I just find it hard to believe.”
“Why? I love you, you make me happy… Why wouldn't I want to be with you for 50 or better, 70 more years? 100?” you said amused, pretending a thoughtful look.
Donna's soft laugh reached your ears, increasing the intensity of your smile, the brightness of your eyes.
“I don't understand,” she said, sighing again, bringing her glass of wine to her lips. “You're a beautiful girl. You shouldn't waste your time with me.”
“Are you kidding?” you asked, dispelling her insecurities in a subtle way. “You're a Lord, you're beautiful... You say beautiful Italian things to me...”
She shook her head, without making her tender smile disappear.
“I don't think these are enough reasons,” the lady in black murmured.
You, fearing a possible tense moment, reached out your hand to hers, caressing it gently.
“Hey, honey... I love you, do you hear me? I love you just the way you are...” you whispered romantically, seeing how the lady had trouble controlling the sadness, the desperation for how unfair life was to her.
“(Y/N), me… Me too,” Donna said, blinking erratically, slowly regaining her composure and relaxing her breathing, which was already beginning to become dangerously labored.
“Me too!” an annoying squeak made you pull your hand back, startling you.
Of course, of course, Angie couldn't leave you two alone at a special romantic dinner. Seriously, she couldn't.
“Angie…” you groaned, annoyed by that interruption.
“Ohhhh, is that a cheesecake?” the doll asked, comically peeking over the table.
“Angie, leave us alone, will you?” the lady said, annoyed by the lack of soft caresses on her hand.
“You're always alone!” the puppet protested, with an unpleasant squeak. “Donna, Donna, do you even remember that I exist too?”
“Yes, Angie,” the doll maker said, shaking her head. “But now is not the time.”
“So when is it? You’re neglecting me! Bad Donna, Silly Donna!” Angie shrieked again.
You rolled your eyes and picked up your piece of dessert, trying hard to ignore the doll.
Luckily, Angie seemed to get tired of you two and disappeared with a comical grumble, which made you genuinely laugh.
“She’s mad…” you joked.
“She’ll get over it,” she said.
“Oh, that's right,” you said, clapping your hands and searching for something under the table, something you had hidden. “Look what I have.”
“Mm?” the lady murmured, reaching out her hand to take the bottle and look at it carefully. “What is it?”
“I think you know…” you said in an expectant tone, raising and lowering your eyebrows. “Open the cap.”
Donna obeyed and smiled in a tender way, as if that citrus aroma reminded her of better times, times gone by.
“Limoncello…” she said in a low voice. “My father used to drink it after eating… It brings back memories to me…”
“Good memories? Please, tell me I haven't made a mistake…” you sighed, hoping that the nostalgia wasn't dangerous, that it was a healthy one.
The doll maker seemed calm, test passed.
“You had a great idea, tesoro… Let me go to get some iced glasses,” she said, standing up and leaning towards you to kiss your lips softly, with that softness that made you tremble.
“Okay,” you said smiling, enjoying a soft caress on your cheek.
The liquor went down your throat in a cool, pleasant way. You had to admit that the Duke had a great idea, Donna seemed happy.
Glass after glass, the conversation moved to your reading corner. A conversation full of words of love, of shy laughs, one that pleasantly reminded you of your first dates.
“Hey, give me another one,” you said amused, extending the small glass towards the brunette, who frowned with a smile and slightly blushed cheeks.
“It's the fourth one, amore mio…” she stammered, pouring you another drink, slurring her words.
“How many have you had?” you asked playfully, giving her a little teasing nudge as she frowned and counted on her fingers.
“Quattro…” she muttered in confusion, shaking her head. “I, I guess it’s not too much.”
“No,” you said laughing, hiccupping unintentionally. “But maybe we should calm down a bit… How strong is this?”
The lady shrugged in a playful pose as you leaned back on the couch, blinking seductively.
“Donna…” you purred, running a finger along her skin erratically, tickling her. “You know what? You look hot today…”
“(Y/N)…” she sighed with a shy smile, sipping from her glass.
“What? Can't I say that my girlfriend is hot?” you protested jokingly, pretending to pout.
It was becoming easier for you to joke or say exactly what you thought, was it because of the liquor?
“Girlfriend?” Donna asked, turning quickly, her face revealing her incipient drunkenness. “Are you my… Girlfriend?”
“Yes…” you said, dragging your voice. “What else would I be? Your maid?”
Donna laughed strangely, shaking her head with a mischievous look.
“I want to tell you a secret…” she whispered, gesturing for you to come closer to her. The smell of alcohol was becoming more and more present in the living room, in that small corner.
 “Oh, a secret…” you said amused, hiccupping. “What secret?”
Donna bit her lip before speaking, covering your ear with her hot breath, one that paradoxically made you shiver.
“I wish you were my maid,” she whispered with a too marked accent, as if searching for words or controlling her language was being a bit difficult for her.
“Mmm,” you moaned sensually, looking into the lady's bright eye and positioning yourself on the couch on your knees, playfully. “Maid, huh?”
“Yes,” the lady said, nodding and playing with your hand, which wandered erratically over her body, playing with the buttons of her dress. “Maids have always turned me on…”
“Hey, Donna!” you said with an exaggerated squeal, surprised by that confession. “Wait, really?”
She faked an innocent face, a good girl look that clashed with that erotic statement.
“Well, well, so the liquor makes you say those things…” you purred again, with an overwhelming heat that made your clothes start to annoy you. “Well, let's drink…”
You awkwardly reached out to reach the bottle and poured two more glasses, which you drank at the same time, in one gulp, letting your throat get even more accustomed to that liquor.
“Come on, come on, keep telling me your fantasies with maids…” you said pushing the lady and climbing on top of her body, with both legs on either side of her hips. “If I were your maid… What would you do to me?”
“Oh, no, I don't want to, hic, be rude,” she said, shaking her head and hiccupping in the same way as you.
You glanced at the bottle, which barely had any of its contents left. Had you gone too far?
“Rude? Come on, tell me, tell me,” you insisted, moving up and down her body. “Look…” you said, keeping your back straight clumsily, raising your index finger and trying to focus your vision. “If you tell me, I’ll, hic, tell you a secret.”
Donna shook her head childishly, with a slightly sinister smile, blinking as if she had the same vision problems as you.
“No… It’s… Pri…Private…” she said, stammering, nervous about your subtle movements on her body, purposely provoking her.
“Donna, don’t be mean…” you complained with an exaggerated moan. “What would you do to me? Wait, wait, I’ll help you…”
Moving, you reached for the bottle again, drinking directly from it and tilting it so she could do the same.
“Finish it all, huh?” you said a bit dizzy, but with the same desire to play.
“Io non sono una bambina…” the lady protested, moving her hands to remove the bottle from her mouth. “Lasciami…”
“Oh… Excuse me, Lady Beneviento… Can I do anything else for you, my lady?” you joked, pretending an elegant voice, inevitably altered by alcohol.
“Taci,” Donna protested with a shy smile, with her cheeks red from drunkenness and that spicy conversation.
“Mmmm, so, maid… I like it,” you murmured thoughtfully, leaning towards her ear. “Would you like me to serve you, Donna? To please you?”
She nodded, panting from the alcoholic sensuality your blurry words conveyed.
“That seems very sexy to me…” you purred, biting her earlobe. “Tell me, if I were your maid, what would you do to me?”
“Mm,” she murmured, with the shadow of disinhibition shining in her only eye, which ran over your figure without any kind of qualms. “I would ask you to clean my dolls…”
“Oh,” you said amused, unintentionally beginning to gently swing your hips, to give yourself pleasure by rubbing them against her body.
“I would love to lift your dress and touch you and then… Put you on your knees and then you, hic, you…”
“I….?” you insisted.
She shook her head with an amused gasp and you protested with a grunt, moving your hips faster.
“Donna…” you said with a sad, demanding tone.
“Use your, hic, imagination” Donna said, laughing amused, putting her hands on your hips so your movements wouldn’t stop. “(Y/N)…”
“Do you like this, darling?” you asked, dragging out your words, biting your lip. “Oh, yes, you like it…”
“You're drunk,” the lady said with a serious tone, but without stopping moving, dancing with your body. “You’ve drunk too much.”
“I guess you haven't, huh?” you joked, putting a finger on her nose, intensifying the drunken look that you endured with a spark of desire.
“I'm a fancy lady,” she protested. “You're not.”
“That hurt,” you said, pretending to stab yourself in the chest. “Let's see, hic, if you're right, I'm going to c… C…Confess my secret to you,” you said, having difficulty pronouncing words clearly.
“With me you don't have... Se...Secrets...” she stammered, frowning and shaking her head, trying to clear the alcoholic haze that was surely clouding her reasoning.
“You think so, huh?” you said amused, leaning back to her ear, licking your lips. “Listen to me... My secret is... I love the taste of your pussy...”
“(Y/N)!” the lady shrieked, with a surprised expression, shaking her head. “Don’t, don't say such rude things... Cazzo...”
“Oh, rude things, huh? Well, you should know that I can’t only say them, I can also do them...”
That was the last sentence you said. Instantly, you threw yourself at her lips, letting your bodies sway more intensely, stealing heat from each other. The kisses tasted of citrus, of the liquor you had consumed. They were clumsy, erratic, almost guided by a primary instinct and not by desire.
“(Y/N)…” the lady protested when your boldness unbuttoned her dress, when your alcoholic kisses began to run over her skin and your hands traveled up her legs.
“Shhh, silence, my lady… I want to fulfill your wish,” you said, going down, lifting the black skirt, making the doll maker uncomfortable.
She protested with a moan.
Her complaints didn’t stop you. You continued with the path that your kisses marked on her skin, moving aside any fabric that dared to get in your way.
“Cazzo!” she shrieked when your tongue made contact with her wet folds, with the desire you could taste between her legs. “More, more!”
Her screams had nothing to do with the romantic Donna she used to be when turning off the light and joining your bodies. Her moans were wild and rude words came out discreetly from her mouth.
You laughed, trying to concentrate on your task, licking her clit, unleashing those wild  moans again before inserting two of your fingers by surprise. Her movements were uncontrollable and her hand pulled at your hair while Donna writhed in pleasure at the skill of your techniques.
The moans echoed through the walls but you barely heard them. Everything was like a blurry vision of what was happening. You moaned feeling her fingers inside of you too, feeling how her body asked for more while stimulating yours.
Kisses, hugs, moans… Nothing that happened seemed to have meaning, seemed to be related. It was like a drunken mess of love and passion, a wild, almost uncontrollable one. The moans were outrageous.
Her body moved crazily on top of yours while your wetness rubbed against each other, while you caressed each other fiercely.
“Sto per venire!” the lady shrieked, tilting her head up as you attacked again with your tongue, running over her excited wetness, that delicious taste mixed with the liquor. “(Y/N), (Y/N)! Keep going, keep going!” she screamed, echoing off the walls of the mansion, accompanied shortly after by several deep, crazy moans, the most outrageous orgasm you had ever heard.
Your release also came or so you thought, as you rubbed yourself against her leg, while your wetness made her skin shine. After that, your mind relaxed, causing the dizziness you felt to become unbearable.
The lady was lying on the couch, running an erratic hand through her hair, across her sweaty forehead, gesturing for you to lie down next to her.
“I want to… Dormire…” Donna murmured, drawing her legs up and turning around tiredly. The alcohol had already completely finished her off, just like it did to you.
“What do you want…? I don’t unders….Underst…Understand, hic,” you asked walking clumsily naked through that corner, grabbing a blanket from an armchair and letting yourself fall on the sofa, covering your bodies with it.
Your eyes closed and the dizziness calmed down, giving way to an inevitable darkness.
The sound of birds attacked your hearing, your head. Your whole body was in pain, your head was throbbing and your throat was burning. It took a while for your vision to focus properly, to see the morning light coming through a living room window.
You looked down and gasped in surprise. You were naked, on the sofa, covered by a blanket. Next to you, breathing deeply, was Donna, also naked, with her body shrunken surely due to the cold that was beginning to make your skin crawl.
“Shit…” you whispered, running a hand through your head, rubbing your eyes. “What the…?”
When you turned your head, sighing, you saw on the coffee table the culprit of that terrible discomfort: the almost empty bottle of limoncello. Your mouth still tasted of that liquor, but your memory was hurt. You didn't remember anything of what had happened.
You shook your head and turned around concentrating to find out what had led you to be like this. The clothes on the floor, the nakedness... Well, at least there were things that were quite clear...
“Donna... Hey, Donna...” you said with a hoarse voice, pushing the body of the lady, who growled annoyed.
You sighed again and shrugged, covering yourself better with the blanket. Surely you should sleep a little more.
Small steps on the wood made you open your eyes again. A soft whistle came from Angie, who walked with small jumps through the house. You followed her with your eyes until she climbed onto the dining chair, glancing at you briefly.
“What…?” you asked weakly, watching the puppet's gestures.
Angie laughed evilly, reaching out to one of the pots hanging from the ceiling wood, unhooking it from its place and looking at you again.
“Oh, no… No… No…” you said, shaking your head at her intentions. “Angie, don’t…”
The doll nodded mockingly and, grabbing the pot with both hands, threw it to the floor, causing a terribly unpleasant noise that tortured your ears.
“Angie!” you shrieked, pressing your temples hard to mitigate the pain the noise caused in your hungover head.
“Non sono stato io!” the nervous lady said, waking up abruptly, wrinkling her forehead and bringing her hand to her black hair. “Oh… Ho mal di testa…”
“Donna…” you sighed, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Tell me you remember anything that happened last night…”
“Last night? No, Io… My, my whole body hurts… I don’t feel well…” she murmured, shaking her head and looking at herself, covering her body immediately. “Why am I naked?”
“Great, I don’t know,” you said, with the same broken voice, exhausted and in pain. “The only thing I remember is that liquor…” you whispered, pointing at the bottle.
“Mm…” she murmured, closing her eye so the pain would calm down. It wasn’t going to do it. “Maledizione…”
“Well, I remember talking something about a maid, but that doesn’t explain why we’re naked on the couch…” you said thoughtfully. “Gods… What a hangover…”
“A maid? No, I don’t remember,” Donna said, covering you affectionately. “You’re going to catch a cold.”
“We should have thought about that before sleeping here, naked,” you groaned, frustrated at not being able to remember. “Wait, have we…?”
“I don't know…” the sleepy lady whispered, annoyed even by the soft volume of your voice. “I can't remember.”
“Ahem,” a shrill voice said, the Angie doll, who was walking towards you with her arms crossed. “It seems that you have amnesia, don't you? How convenient…”
“Angie…” Donna sighed, annoyed by the high-pitched tone of her doll's voice. “Shut up, please…”
“Oh, you want me to shut up, huh, silly Donna?” the doll mocked, climbing onto the coffee table and pacing around it haughtily. “Then I suppose you don't want to know what happened last night.”
Donna and you looked at each other, frowning.
“Do you know?” you asked, holding the blanket and sitting upright on the couch.
“Do I know?” Angie asked, pointing at herself. “You've traumatized me, stupid!”
“Don't yell…”Donna and you whispered in unison, shaking your heads with a painful sob.
“It's been the worst experience of my life, Donna! Since when do you say such dirty things?” the doll asked, pointing at her owner, who shrank on the couch, comically hiding behind your back.
“I don't know what you're talking about,” the lady said nervously, starting to blush. You looked at her with the same confused expression.
“Oh, allow me to explain it to you,” the puppet said, pretending to clear her throat. “More, (Y/N), more! Faster, fuck me like the filthy maid you are! That's it, use your mouth, doll, eat me out!”
“Basta, basta, Angie,” Donna said hurriedly, shaking her head effusively. “I couldn't say that.”
“Couldn’t you? Oh, and you too, you Donna-stealer,” Angie said pointing at you. “Yes, Donna, deeper, deeper, use me like the doll I am!”
“Hey, shut up now, is this a joke?” you protested also embarrassed. Well, at least that fit with your nakedness, and clothes on the floor. “Oh, shit… She heard us,” you whispered to the lady in black, who sank in the couch.
“I heard you and the whole village too, I'm pretty sure,” the doll said, crossing her arms. “What are you up to? I mean, to add more things to the fact that you don't stop ignoring me, you have to rub your obscenities right in my face, huh?”
“Angie, it, it wasn't on purpose,” Donna said, stammering. “It was the limoncello…”
“Of course, blame it on the alcohol,” the doll mocked, pointing at the bottle. “You're a couple of drunken nymphomaniacs! I hate you!”
“Angie, wait,” the lady in black murmured, leaning over the doll as Angie angrily climbed down from the table, disappearing from the room. “Don't hate me…”
It might have seemed like one of Angie's passing tantrums, one of her calls for attention, but she was pretty serious that time. She didn't show up for the whole morning. Donna wanted to pretend she didn't care, but her face said it all.
“Grazie, tesoro…” the lady murmured as you poured her some medicine for that horrible headache, one that you also took.
“Honey, you're worried,” you said in a soft voice, sitting next to her on the couch. Poor Donna was so sick that she couldn't even work on her dolls. You should have listened to the Duke's advice.
“It's nothing,” she whispered, drinking the medicine and rubbing her forehead.
“It's because of Angie, isn't it?” you asked in a more tender voice, looking for the doll with your eyes. She wasn't there.
Donna nodded slowly, squeezing her eye tightly.
“I've never seen her that mad,” she said, looking at the ceiling, letting you hug and caress her in a comforting way. “I can't believe we... Cazzo...”
“Well, it was a mistake, neither of us intended to traumatize her, it was a horrible mistake,” you said, with an amused smile, lifting her chin and kissing her deformed cheek, one of her favorite gestures of affection.
She smiled slightly, but shook her head.
“The... incident last night wouldn't be so important if... If she wasn't right,” the lady said, with a tired sigh.
“What do you mean?”
“Angie has always been with me, since I was 6 years old she has been inseparable for me,” the brunette began, looking at the floor, remembering… “She was my only friend and, I, I was so happy when I could give her life… She was my companion, my faithful companion…”
“Mm, I understand,” you said softly.
“You came into my life to turn everything upside down, you know? Don't get me wrong, I don't know what I would do without you but… It's, it's true that I may have neglected Angie,” Donna said, to which you smiled tenderly. “I used to play with her before, talk for hours… And now, it's, it's true that I don't pay as much attention to her and on top of that… On top of that last night… Oh, mio Dio… How embarrassing…”
“Don't blame yourself, Donna, we are both guilty of not having control,” you said softly, rubbing her back.
“I can't imagine how humiliating it was for Angie to see me… like this…” the ventriloquist lamented, burying her face in her hands.
“Well… If you're so worried…” you sighed thoughtfully, controlling the pain in your head. “Why don't we do something for her?”
“Now it's really getting interesting…” a mocking voice appeared by surprise.
Angie, who seemed to be listening (to no one's surprise) suddenly appeared, walking while laughing mockingly and jumping onto Donna's lap.
“Hey, were you spying on us?” you asked amused, trying not to be unpleasant.
“Yes, although last night you put me off doing it anymore,” the puppet said.
Donna smiled tenderly, carefully placing Angie's clothes.
“Perdonami, Angie… I didn't mean to make you feel that way,” the lady said, apologizing sincerely.
“Mm, it's too soon to accept your apologies, silly Donna…” the doll said with a cocky tone, but not getting off her lap. “But I’ve heard something I liked…”
“Let me guess, it's when I said we should do something for you, am I wrong?” you said with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile.
“I think we're starting to understand each other, you silly intruder…” Angie murmured in a sinister voice.
“What do you want?” Donna asked, staring at her, frowning. “We'll do whatever it takes to make it up to you.”
“Well, whatever…” you murmured, catching the doll's attention, who turned her head sharply.
“Do you want me to forgive you, stupid fools?” Angie asked mockingly, standing on Donna's legs. You both nodded automatically. “Well, I want… I want… I want… Oh! Get up.”
You and Donna looked at each other but obeyed. The doll sat on the couch, swinging her legs expectantly.
“Do you remember the puppet show you did when you were 17, silly Donna?” Angie asked, pointing at the brunette, who frowned.
“Yes, of course I remember them,” she said, in a seemingly calm voice. “The Mighty Angie versus the Moon Monsters.”
“Yes, that's it, that's it!” the doll said.
You looked at the lady, confused.
“I want you two to make me a puppet show, I want one of those stories like the ones Donna told me,” the doll demanded, tilting her head.
“What is she talking about?” you asked in a small voice. “A puppet show? It must be a joke.”
“I'm afraid it’s not, tesoro…” the lady sighed, crossing her arms. “Okay, Angie.”
“Well, I'll go get the stuff, you two should do some… Rehearsing…”
The Angie doll ransacked the whole house to take out an old, hand-made stage along with two puppets. One was Angie herself, and the other was a deformed monster.
“Here,” Donna said, putting the stage on the floor and handing that horrible monster you.
“Wait, wait,” you said nervously. “Hey, Donna, I have no idea how to do this, besides, why do I have to be this bug thing?”
“No complaints, silly (Y/N)! Only my Donna can be the Mighty Angie!” the doll protested. You growled annoyed by the irritating voice that still made a dent in your wounded head.
“Calm down, tesoro, you'll see that it's easy,” Donna said, concentrated, touching up the last details of that scenario and kneeling behind it. “Come, kneel with me.”
“Donna, I don't know what this Mighty Angie thing is about,” you said gently, making the gesture of quotation marks with your fingers. “What do I do?”
“I'm waiting…” the doll hummed impatiently, making you growl again.
“I'm coming,” you said in a gruff tone.
Donna smiled at you and reassured you with a soft kiss on your lips.
“You'll do very well, amore mio,” the lady said with a tender voice. It even seemed that somehow she was happy to do that. You thought it was simply adorable.
It was quite difficult at first, but soon you were able to improvise that show. Donna was giving voice to the puppet, which, of course, was the great heroine of the story.
“Get back, stupid moon monster! You don't know who you're messing with,” the Mighty Angie said said approaching where you were sticking the puppet out.
 Seeing Donna doing those things always amused you. You wondered why a woman so cheerful and funny on the inside, was so gloomy on the outside.
“So you are the Mighty Angie,” you said, getting into the role of a dangerous monster, deepening your voice in a way that made you blush. Luckily, Angie couldn't see you. “Surely you're not as mighty as they say... Um... Um... Ha, ha, ha...” you laughed evilly
“You think so, huh? Haven't they taught you manners in your cave, you disgusting bug? Don't worry. I'll take care of that.”
Donna brought her puppet closer to yours, pretending to fight, even making sounds and growls in a really impressive way. She certainly had a talent for that stuff.
“You won’t beat me, you space leech!” Angie’s puppet shrieked, struggling with yours.
“You think you’re so powerful, huh? You’ll never be able to beat me!” the moon monster said laughing evilly as your blush disappeared.
“No, Mighty Angie, it’s provoking you! You’re stronger than it!” the real Angie shrieked, waving her arms excitedly.
“Oh, so you have allies…” you murmured, turning the puppet towards the couch, pointing at Angie with one of its tentacles. “Maybe I should finish them off first…”
“Never!” the other puppet exclaimed, lunging at yours. “Aha, that’s your weak point! Your force shield doesn't cover your back!”
You looked at Donna in confusion and she shrugged, laughing in amusement. You smiled too. You weren't having a bad time after all.
“Oh no, she's figured it out! Mighty Angie, spare my life, I'll leave this planet forever,” you said in a pleading tone, bringing the puppet's tentacles together.
“Too late, space slug!” the small puppet screamed before launching itself at yours for the final attack.
“Oh no… I'm dying…” you said, feigning agony and dropping the monster on the stage.
“Good! Good!” Angie clapped. “Mighty Angie is invincible! That was great, you fools!”
“Ugh,” you sighed, standing up and removing the puppet from your hand, helped by the lady, who did the same, shaking your clothes.
“You haven't been too bad, have you? You're good at it,” Donna commented, bringing her puppet closer to pretend to eat you. “Yum, yum.”
You laughed shyly under her warm smile, approaching her and kissing her tenderly on the lips.
“Hey, hey, hey, hey!” Angie protested, getting off the couch and pushing her owner's legs away from you. “No kisses, silly fools!”
“Oh, come on, we've told you a great story,” you said amused, finally moving away from the lady in black.
“Do you accept my apologies now, Angie?” Donna asked, with a pleading look, extending her hand towards the puppet's.
“Mm, let me think... No, I don’t”
“You don’t?” you two asked at the same time.
“Um, it seems that you don't realize the seriousness of your actions, you drunken fools... If you think that with that show you're going to make me forget about last night, you can wait for it,” Angie said, pretending to look at her nails.
“Angie, we've done what you wanted, hey, we need to rest for a while,” you said, with the kindest voice possible.
“No sleeping!” the puppet shrieked, making the pain return to your head. Donna and you groaned at those shrieks. “You're going to do what I tell you or I won't forgive you.”
“I'm starting to think that it's not so bad having you hating us,” you murmured, crossing your arms. Donna approached, putting a hand on your shoulder.
“Per favore, amore mio... Let's play along a bit longer. She'll soon get tired and leave us alone," Donna told you with a sincere look that exuded confidence.
You rolled your eyes and sighed, nodding slowly.
“Okay... Okay, Donna, I'll do it for you.”
That was the beginning of that hellish day.
Angie had taken absolute control of the Beneviento house. You and Donna showered her with little details, whims like balls of wool to play with, children’s games around the house...
Of course, Angie knew how she wanted to spend her time, she had an idea for every moment and you had no choice but to bow your heads and accept. Otherwise, Angie would start shouting the obscene phrases she heard the night before, something Donna couldn't stand.
Damn blackmailing doll...
“What are you doing? Keep fanning me, you fool,” the doll demanded while you fanned. She certainly looked like a queen from another time, even with her own private throne, one that Donna had to desperately search for in the attic.
“What’s the point of that? Can you even feel it?” you asked, sighing tiredly, lying on the floor in a humiliating manner.
The doll slowly turned towards you, with a look you already knew.
“Oh, Donna, use your tongue on my…!”
“Okay, okay! I’ll fan you…” you said annoyed, earning a sinister laugh from the doll.
Your body hadn’t yet recovered from the hangover and, after hours of playing hide and seek, you were increasingly tired. It seemed that Angie didn’t want to waste a single minute of her glorious day.
“But, don't, yell, please,” you hissed while moving your hand.
Donna appeared shortly after, holding a small doll in her hands.
“Here it is,” she murmured, crouching down next to you and giving the toy to Angie. “Is this what you wanted?”
“Yes!” Angie shouted, getting down from the throne and picking up the small doll. “How pretty it is!” she exclaimed, hugging her gift.
Donna laughed amused, unable to hide her tiredness.
“Thank you…” the doll sighed, hugging her owner in a tender way, like you had never seen before. You smiled too and even more so when Angie walked towards you, giving you the same hug. “Hey, you're being very good to me, fools.”
“I never thought I'd say this but…” you murmured, hugging the doll back. “The truth is that you are adorable when you want to.”
“What nonsense, I always am,” the doll said, gesturing with her hand and playing with her new doll.
“Have fun with your new doll, I think we…” Donna said, taking your hand to get you up and yawning comically. “Are going to take a nap…”
“No way,” Angie protested, with that sinister tone again. “Don't you know what time it is, silly Donna?”
“No…” the lady sighed frowning, hugging you from behind and kissing your neck sweetly.
“Tea time!”
“No, Angie, please…” you sighed, putting a hand on your forehead.
Of course, you had to have tea with her and her dolls… That was the worst part.
“Do you want some sugar Mrs. Thin Butts?” the doll asked, playing with her toy tea set. If only it had been real tea…
You looked at poor Donna who, due to exhaustion, had fallen asleep leaning against the sofa, her head resting on her hand.
“Mrs. Thin Butt…” you said through your teeth, nudging her awake.
“Dove siamo?” she asked, shaking her head.
“I say if you wanted sugar, silly!” Angie shrieked, eliciting another annoyed grunt from you.
Fortunately, that fake tea was the last of Angie’s demands. It took a whole day, but she finally got tired of torturing you.
“Aren’t you having dinner, tesoro?” Donna asked, sitting down on the couch next to you, a plate of fruit on her lap.
“I’m not hungry,” you said in a husky voice, curling up on yourself on the couch. “Well, if you give me a piece of that apple…” you said, sitting up and taking the piece the lady cut with a knife, giving it to you in a romantic way.
“It’s been a rough day, hasn’t it?” she murmured, running a gentle hand through your hair. “Don’t worry, it’s over.”
“Yeah…” you sighed, glancing at the bottle of liquor that was still in its place. You felt a chill. “Remind me not to drink again…”
“My grandfather used to say that a glass of limoncello was perfect for a hangover,” Donna commented, taking the bottle.
You laughed, shaking your head.
“Even if that limoncello is the one to blame?” you joked.
The lady in black shrugged, uncorking the bottle and taking a sip.
“It’s better than last night… But it’s warm,” she said, making a face of disgust. “I’ll go get some cold glasses.”
“Bring me five,” you said, making a vague gesture with your hand.
It was obvious that you hadn’t learned from your mistakes and, when that bottle was already empty, the laughter and babbling reached the dark room again.
“Hey, hey, hey Donna…” you said, unable to stop laughing, climbing up her body again. “Shall I tell you a secret?”
The lady laughed with red cheeks again, with that sinister look that the liquor caused her.
A few quick steps made you look at Angie, who was running away in terror.
“Oh, no! Not again!”
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sergle · 1 year
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There's something about like. A certain genre of posts / Online Opinions about insecurity/depression/misery/complaints that are so unhelpful that they wrap right around to being straight up hilarious. and it's the ones that are more or less written to the tone of "Feeling bad? That's gross!" Like, just so you know, don't voice your insecurities/ have low self esteem, because that's offputting! You're gross and weird. Don't be insecure about that, though. That would be stupid if you felt insecure about people disliking you for being insecure. Not attractive. You should be thinking about being as attractive as possible. You shouldn't make comments about suicide, even if you're suicidal! Keep those thoughts entirely to yourself. Make sure nobody around you knows you're thinking about this. It would Make Them Uncomfortable. It's better to keep these thoughts in your head where they can fester. Don't post OR talk to friends with complaints about you feeling miserable or depressed. Tbh people who are sad/upset a lot? Kinda a red flag! You are probably miserable because you're a bad person and you've brought this on yourself. If you don't have friends, it's because you're awful to be around. Easy! Solved the problem for you. And no, there is no nuance to this, got it? So, make sure to feel bad about feeling bad, but don't feel bad about it, because, well, that's just gross. And annoying! You might've wanted your brain rotted thoughts to be Peer Reviewed, you might have just needed to vent- you might've been hoping for some comfort, to get things off your chest. Well, don't! Don't talk about thoughts or feelings that are negative with your friends, you'd be burdening them and that's only meant for THERAPY. #SponsoredbyBetterHelp #MentalHealth like, DAMN. that's so helpful. you're so good at helping. I um really liked the part where these are all hard and fast rules that encourage keeping feelings bottled up and keeping your friends at arm's length. That's really funny of you.
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essektheylyss · 2 years
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Honestly, it is so funny remembering that Annabeth Chase's literal, stated, canonical fatal flaw is hubris.
Rick Riordan was like, "This clever, neurodivergent preteen girl believes that she is smarter than the gods, and she will get the chance to prove herself right," and he was correct. 😌
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mattzerella-sticks · 5 months
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When Eddie comes out as gay the funniest thing Buck can do is set him up on a blind date with Josh only for Buck to learn too late that Josh and Eddie don't like each other.
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gwinverarrouz · 7 months
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The first time I ever drew this character was exactly ten years ago today :'>
This is such a quick doodle, sorry Sylvestre, maybe I ought to muster up something better for your anniversary– but at the same time, it's kinda fitting? I made him up one day where I was very frustrated with my art, because I couldn't get anything to look how I wanted, and I just… decided to draw something for me. And then I wanted to draw him again, and, eh, it's ten years later and I'm still doodling this guy, apparently!
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tardis--dreams · 5 months
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Some of those doctors make hating oat milk their entire personality. I hate them. Cannot pretend to find them funny or like i give a shit. Fucking pretentious assholes
#also my colleague (the girl i had my shift with) is the exact opposite of me in all aspects. asked me if I'd ever worked in customer service#because i couldn't care less about being fake friendly to assholes and don't care if they like the service or not#like bitch those people don't have any other choice but drink our fucking coffee it's not like I'm competing with anyone#or like they pay us in any way. i get paid for doing the dumb work i have to do not for stroking some dumb ass doctors' egos#they come out of their rooms once an hour to get coffee and we have the cups on the table and i wouldn't even Think of#HANDING them the cups and smiling sweetly at them and asking 'coffee? tea?? :))'#I'll just assume these grown adults will get their stupid coffee or tea when they want some. it's not like they don't know where it is#(and i AM friendly and smile when someone is coming in our direction but why the fuck do you need to get so disgustingly friendly with them#if someone held up a cup asking if i.want some coffee I'd leave immediately even if i came just for coffee. it's creepy)#anyway. she's nice. I'm not.#there's normal people who will get their coffee and maybe ask if the milk in the little jug is cow milk to which I'll happily reply 'yes#:)'. then there's the other people who see the oat milk and make it clear they are the most insufferable people on the planet#(and i pity their patients so much. not much to choose from i guess but if i had that as a doctor I'd happily just die)#like everyone who took oatmilk could do it without making a fuss about the cow milk on the table. the cow milk lovers could never#'the oat milk is in front of the actual milk. this is unacceptable. i hate such healthy bullshit' lol okay#'OAT milk?? I'll leave this to the horses! THANK GOD you have actual milk!'#my favorite was the one who really took personal offense with its sheer presence. as if it had killed half of his patients lmao#'we had 50 patients with xyz problem. ALL of them drink oat milk. they cannot see the connection. it's really unhealthy'#at this point i just said i didn't care and stopped paying attention and he started complaining to his doctor colleague about how#oat milk is advertised to be healthy and how it's actually the opposite and i just find that very funny compared to the first comment#from that one guy who doesn't like such healthy bullshit. you guys need to find a consensus on the oatmilk issue i think. no one takes you#seriously if you contradict yourself like this. also i couldn't care less about the healthiness of the milk alternative of my choice. bitch.#next week I'll end up killing someone. i hope they all die from their cow milk. (but not the ones who took cow milk and didn't say anything#about the oat milk. they can continue living as they didn't annoy me)#void screams#some of these doctors were actually quite nice (most of them even). one even brought an applicant to us telling her to get some coffee#(which we are not allowed to give to applicants. but i don't care. I'd rather they get something than some of the asshole jury members#who hate oat milk (which is not the issue. the issue is them making it everybody else's issue that they don't like oat milk))
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cloudbattrolls · 5 months
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Tell Us How to Live
Gliese Benral | Forest Near the Kelter Mansion | Present Night
Something was changing.
She’d felt it, reaching into her constructs lately. She had a deeper connection now, could feel through their senses more acutely. It wasn’t necromancy, wasn’t flesh and bone and spirit. Not directly. 
Wasn’t plantcraft either. She was getting better at that, coaxing buds and thorns from scraps with ease now, but this was totally unrelated. This didn’t occur when she shaped flowers or vines; same level of control as ever. She couldn’t commune with her plants, fucking shame that it was.
No, this was…weird. Not bad, but weird, the way she was linked to them now. She could feel their thoughts - more than their thoughts. Their perceptions, simple and blunted as they were, being non-sapient constructs, with dead bodies and half-dead minds.
The drag of a bony foot through soil. The swirl of a breeze through dead hair.
She hadn’t tried on Zeller yet. She knew asking probably wouldn’t go down well. 
Gliese wanted to ask Quilis. In person.
Sure, she could’ve gone to Astirn. But her friend wasn’t in the middle of a damn desert, and if this was some emerging change to her magic, she wanted advice before she presented it to her mentor. 
So she went over, and oh who was fucking waiting in the woods but creature feature itself.
“It’s not safe right now.” Said Eileit as she approached, wearing its stupid goth maid outfit as the blueblood resisted the urge to throw something at it.
“Bullshit.” She said. “You just don’t want me there.”
It shook its head. “Quilis isn’t accepting visitors, and they’re away at the shop right now. I can ask them to text you when they get back if you want an explanation.”
“Then why are you here?” She demanded. “How come you get to stick around?”
It blinked. “To help.”
She snarled. “Like hell you are. What’s your real reason? What are you planning?”
“Whatever I say, you won’t believe.” It said calmly. “Goodbye.”
It turned to walk away. Gliese, frustrated, reached out with her magic just to stop it in place -
A vast well of feeling. Silver and black and green, a web of wires, a sea of blades, a storm of light -
Quilis’s face and voice. Her favorite teas. The decorations on the taxidermy. A plush bear. A bag of candies. Conversations. Laughter. 
Deep respect. Admiration. A desire to learn more. An appreciation of beauty. A strange fondness. 
An acceptance of its place, that none of this should be spoken of.
Love, the blueblood realized, as she struggled to extract herself from the swirl of feelings. 
So much love.
She came back to reality, nearly stumbling onto the grass.
The blueblood breathed hard, her lean face covered in sweat. Her glowing orange eyes crackled slightly, and blue sparks flew around the base of her horns as well.
Eileit had turned around and its eyes - weren’t maroon anymore. 
The sclera had gone black. The pupils were bright jade slits.
“What -“ It said pleasantly, but with an unmistakable edge to its tone. “- did you just do?”
“Uh.” She said, still reeling a bit from the wash of emotions. “I don’t know.” She admitted. 
“Hm.” It said, arms crossed behind its back as it examined her. “My mind - no, my feelings. If it was my mind, you’d be in worse shape, most likely…”
“Yeah, I didn’t really get like, words?” She said, wiping her face with a small towel from her sylladex. “Just emotions. Shit, I didn’t know I could do that. You’re not undead. How did I do that?”
She paused, then looked disgusted as it sank in.
“Oh god. You have a flushcrush on Quilis. I so regret asking.”
Its face was unreadable.
“Will you tell her?”
Gliese snorted.
“Fuck no. I don’t want to give her daymares.”
It nodded. A bird called somewhere in the trees.
“Then we agree. No need to speak of it.”
“Thank god.” She said fervently. “I’d have to teach you a hard lesson otherwise.”
It stared at her with those awful green slits, those piercing eyes, and Gliese shivered.
Its clasped its hands politely. Its head tilted slightly, one ear raised, the other lowered.
“What would you do-” It said, so soft, so cold. “-if I felt differently?”
Gliese bit her lip, ears flicking as she looked away - up, down, settling on the side.
“I’d-” She said, then stopped. “I’d- fuck.” She spat. 
“I’d do nothing! Happy? I’d fucking do nothing, and you know it. Gloat about it, why don’t you.”
It shook its head. “It’s not about me, Gliese. This is very much about you.”
“Oh, don’t fucking try to schoolfeed me.” She snarled. “Of course this is about you! You and your - fucked up feelings.”
It blinked. 
“Am I to be condemned when I’ve never spoken a word? When I would never act on them?”
Gliese wanted to say she couldn’t trust it. But she’d seen - she’d felt - the truth. Eileit knew better. It understood Quilis would never return its feelings, and it didn’t mind. 
“You’re so fucking - righteous.” She muttered. “It feels fake. No one’s really that pure about it. Everyone wants their crush to notice them, at least a little.”
“Not righteous.” It said, shaking its head. “Aware there’s no point. I've cut out feelings like that to ensure my silence and courtesy.”
The hare troll bit her lip. It was so…so goddamn casual about fucking with its own head. No wonder it hadn’t freaked out when she’d accidentally found her own way in.
Accidentally, and yet it had felt entirely natural. Like she was meant to do stuff like that.
“Yeah, well.” She said roughly, pushing onward. “Good. Keep it that way.”
“I don’t want to be told to leave.” It said with amusement. 
Gliese paused.
“Doubt they’d tell you to.” She admitted, grudgingly.
“Maybe not.” Eileit acknowledged. “But they would be within their rights if they did.” It said calmly. 
“I’m content with what I do and the kindness Quilis has shown me.” It continued, tapping its chin. “But…it isn’t technically any of your business. You aren’t her quadrant. And she’s more than capable of handling herself.”
“I’m her friend.” The blueblood spat. “I know Quilis can handle herself fine! I’m not worried about that.”
“Worried about what, then.” It said, blinking. 
She gritted her teeth.
“It’s just - it’s fucking weird! No one knows exactly what you are or what you’ll do. None of us know shit. We can’t trust you.”
It nodded.
“Good points. But be honest.”
She wanted to strangle the fucking thing, but she knew it wouldn’t help. “You’re a freak.” She finally admitted. “You’re a freak and a threat and nowhere near being a troll. Even Tuuya used to be one. You never were, were you?”
“No.” It agreed with a creepy smile.
“See that? That right there?” She said, pointing at its face. “That is why I don’t fucking like it. You are a disturbing little bitch and you don’t even try to pretend otherwise or apologize or anything.”
“I didn’t ask to exist this way.” It said calmly. “I am as I was made.”
“You could put more effort into being normal.” Gliese muttered.
It looked at her, a trace of weariness on its red-freckled face.
“Being like a troll…would require amputating the majority of myself. There would only be a fragment left. It would be stiff and stilted, or shallow and lacking. There is no version of me sanitized enough for your liking.”
“Maybe Quilis would be into you if you tried.” she murmured, aware it wasn't a great joke, but goddamn this situation needed some levity.
Eileit looked at her with such withering disdain that she blushed blue in mild shame.
It spoke a single word.
“No.”
Gliese wanted to be angry. She wanted to shout that who did it think it was, talking back to her? It was a machine. A machine couldn’t comprehend or feel love…
…and yet this one did. 
It turned away, apparently done with the conversation.
“So, what, you’d rather just not change, even if people liked you more?”
“Would you?” It said neutrally, beginning to walk away from her.
She gritted her teeth. “Okay, not usually, but…some people are worth changing for. Worth trying to be better.”
“Quilis has made no complaint about my behavior or service.” It said. “If they did, I would listen.”
It got further away, deeper into the forest.
Gliese ran to catch up to it, stopping a few feet behind the false maroon.
“Yeah, well…I’m not saying you should say anything, obviously, but you wouldn’t try to act more troll, even for her?”
It stopped and looked at the blueblood.
“‘And if the body were not the soul, what is the soul? I have perceived that to be with those I like is enough.’”
It walked faster, disappearing behind the trees before she could say anything else.
The mage’s orange eyes followed it, uncertain, her ears slightly lowered.
Well, this sure wasn’t how she’d expected discovering her native domain to go.
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keeps-ache · 4 months
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mm i Neeed to go the beach
#just me hi#wauhuhh !#something about just drifting around in water that i am slightly scared of that really makes my brain whir happily lol :>#i am slightly scared of it for two major reasons: 1) fish. lord the fish why are they so scary 2) sometimes i think i'll drown and they jus#won't find the body. which is less rational than the fish so that's why fish is my number 1 fear at all times lmao#/i think out of all the animals on the planet i am the most scared of ordinary fish. not even the deep sea stuff hfbshv#cuz look they're so far down there you Have to assume they look funked. and also they prolly don't like human meat. so it's cool#but regular fish?? some of them eat birds. they eat birds dude. what would they do to me if they knew how to use harpoons??#also they for SURE eat corpses so we loop back to fear no. 2 really just being fear no. 1 hbfhs#/see i'm not even that scared of the animals my parents are determined on exploding. like man if i get eaten that was prolly bound#to happen anyway. i Know how that goes. i know what mauling is lol#i am the only person in this house who will walk around outside on a moonless light w/ no flashlight because if i was sposed to be dead i#can guaranteE there are much better opportunities. funnier ones‚ too#/just looked it up bobcats are SHY little guys. they are just shy babies. except for when they have rabies :)#shy rabies babies <3#/anyway back to the fish. i don't like how there are some that specifically like to eat human skin. mmm no i have never liked that ever not#one little bit. makes my skin crawl hghfsh#i don't care what it does or can do that is NOT cool lil dude ;w;#/hang on i'm googling 'weirdest things fish eat' because i want to scare myself i guess hbfhvbsf :'3#they're only showing me weird fish!!! no !! tell me about a fish that's living exclusively off of plastics!! or car tires !! come on !!!#these guys are just funky looking. and just Kinda funky looking. though this humphead guy is funny lol :)#he looks scary but with a charm that i can't deny#his forehead. and mouf. this guy is awesome#and of course he's endangered because the world is exploding. but it's so cool he exists :D#//anyway fish are scary. and miss humphead is Huge so goofiness aside he's also scary hhfbvs#also why do some of those motherfunkers swim close to shore and bite at you. those guys suck so bad#that's only happened to me so many times but enough for me to have a fear that has lasted for over half a decade lmao#//and anywho i'm running out of tag space lol :)#we're going ot the park!! i'm going to skate :DD !!#i wanna get good at my old stuff again hfsh - so bye! bye !! toodles !!!
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Three of my favorite 7th graders last year (who are 8th graders this year) told me specifically that they missed me, and two 8th grade boys (who were my favorite 7th graders last year) called me their "bestie" and one said he loved me and then asked me 20 rather personal questions in rapid-fire sequence (which kinda made me uncomfortable, but the way this kid is I kinda understand not to always take him too seriously...as in, he means well, and I know that), so I think I'll be okay this year, even if I'm the only tutor at work and that is HELLA SCARY. :')
No, but really, if I truly end up being the only tutor at work for the whole year, it'll be interesting to see how it works out. Like if the 7th and 8th graders end up needing to shoulder the responsibility of acting as tutors for the younger grades, how they'll manage that, especially working with me as the one tutor they all have in common and who certainly will not put up with any bullshit! The 7th and 8th graders know that about me, though. (In other words, I wonder if they'll take the responsibility seriously I do try to model a serious, responsible attitude, and I don't have much time for goofing off in spite of being fairly laid-back - do those things seem opposite to you? I wonder how it's possible myself; I'm very interested in and willing to go with the flow, but I also take my and everyone else's use of time seriously so I want to let things get done in as non-silly a manner as possible...if that makes sense or if they'll try to take advantage of me being there - especially being the one tutor or even technically person with any experience/authority with this work in the case of the 6th graders. Since the 8th graders this year have some experience with being 'assistant tutors' last year, though, I think they'll manage well as long as they can manage to not get too silly with their younger peers, LOL, but maybe a summer has lent them a teensy bit more maturity than they had last year? 😂. I do believe in and have faith in them! But I'm also always interested in just...seeing how it plays out.)
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slavicafire · 6 months
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we've been living in this apartment for two months now, and while we've observed most of our new neighbours (my slavic Windowsill Watcher Grandmother gene already activated), I don't think they had the chance to see us often enough to recognise us yet.
I do know, however, from my observations, that the tiny funny dog upstairs is called Gucio. I've passed him once or twice during his walk and heard his owners use the name - and, while both the dog and his owners are oblivious to our existence, Gucio became an apt topic of discussion in our house. you know, we hear barking, ha, that's Gucio, he must be home alone again! or there's a stick left by the building door, that must have been brought by Gucio and he was forced to abandon it before entering! a household name, really.
yesterday as I was leaving to go to the store, walking down the narrow staircase, there he is! tiny funny looking dog, slightly startled by me suddenly appearing on the floor he just reached on his tiny funny looking legs.
"good morning Gucio!" I say joyfully, the most natural thing in the world.
well. remember that Gucio doesn't really know me. so he looks at me in the most flabbergasted way a dog can look at a person. he is positively aghast. agog! not sure how aware dogs are of their own names but he seemed genuinely puzzled at the apparent stretch of social convention.
and as I try to contain my laughter, I see his owner standing on the stairs below. the woman is sort of awkwardly frozen, speechless, and she looks at me.
"you... know each other?" she asks.
is that not the funniest way to phrase it. is this not the funniest question she could have asked. ma'am do you know my dog? you went to school together perhaps? you've met? do tell, are you old friends? maybe you worked together? you know each other, my dog and you? this dog? you know him? he knows you? he never mentioned you I'm afraid
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sideeve · 8 months
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⠀⠀⠀“WHAT?! SEX BAN?!”
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﹅ contains ;; gojo satoru , kento nanami , choso kamo , toji fushiguro , ryomen sukuna , geto suguru
﹅ alt title ;; how long the jjk men can withstand the sex ban
﹅ warnings ;; sorta sub!choso , whiny!choso , toji's part is more explicit than the others , this is my first time writing for some of the character so i'm sorry if i didn't describe them well
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GOJO SATORU (3 days)
“are you serious?” gojo groans, slumping forwards. gojo watched in disappointment as you crossed your arms, looking away from him. "you did it so you have to pay." for weeks, you've been trying to tell gojo to separate the colors from the whites while doing laundry. him just wanting to get it over with, he dumped them all in the same load, ruining some of your favorite pieces of clothing.
"baby, please. i won't do it again," he begs, kneeling in front of you. but to no avail, you stood your ground.
it only took him 3 days to convince you to wave your white flag, surrendering to his seduction. "you look good in my shirts." gojo's hands caress your hips as he presses his chest to your back. "i would be in my clothes if you would just listen to me." you huff, "i never said i was disappointed." gojo whispered, his hard-on pressing on your ass.
“please. just drop the ‘sex ban’. i said i was sorry.” his lips make a trail of kisses on your neck. you needed him too. whenever he wasn’t around, you would use your toys, trying to not let gojo know you were sexually needy. but they didn’t work.
RYOMEN SUKUNA (not happening!)
no. just no. it’s funny that you even thought about putting that in motion. sukuna was too desperate for sex but never wanted to admit it.
“no,” he stood above, crossing his arms, making himself seem bigger than you (as if he even needed to do that). “you can’t deprive me of sex, woman.” he grunts. “but i can, kuna. that’s what you fail to realize.” you tut, standing up to walk away.
one of his four arms wraps around your waist, throwing you back on the soft surface. "you're not going through with this." he growls in your ear, crawling go top of you.
how dare you even think such a thing? you were his woman, his twin flame. you were the only person he showed the littlest respect to and you decide to do some foolery like this.
he tugs your shirt over your head, your bra coming next. his rough hands slide over your chest. "such beauty..." he whispers. "i'll make sure you never think of this again.
KENTO NANAMI (it was on accident)
his job was taking him away from you. between being a jujutsu sorcerer and a businessman, he couldn't find time to be a partner for you.
due to the lack of attention you were receiving, you became sexually pent up, having the urge to pleasure yourself at the worst times. the feeling of neglect was creeping up on you. some days, you forgot nanami even lived with you.
"love, i'm home." nanami tugs off his tie, tossing it to the side. "i don't know how long i can take of this." he rubs his temples, deeply sighing as he led himself to your shared bedroom. before his hand touched the cold metal knob, he heard your muffled moans and the squelching of your cunt.
he slowly opens the door, peeking in the room before fully entering. "it seems i've neglected you." he watches as you quickly cover yourself as if he hasn't seen you naked many times. he unbuttons the top of his shirt as he saunters to the edge of the bed, removing the covers off you.
"seems like i have some things to make up for."
CHOSO KAMO (not even a day)
"please." he whines, his head resting on your lap as he looks up at you. ever since you shared your first time with choso, he's been going at it with you like rabid dogs. if he wasn't inside you, his head was squished in between his thighs.
"choso, i need a break." you sigh, trying to remove him from off you. his grip on your legs was tight as he put his face in between your thighs, shaking his head. he was acting like he couldn't survive without your cunt somehow being involved.
"i swear, i'll leave you alone after. just please," he whined. you couldn't resist him for much longer. you hated when he got all whiny like a baby. he was spoiled because of you.
"fine." you undo the tie of your sweatpants before his hands swatted yours away, tugging your pants and panties off. "i promised you." he kisses your inner thigh before his tongue began flicking away.
TOJI FUSHIGURO (mans was balls deep in you the second you said it)
"you really think so?" he darkly chuckles, rubbing himself on you. "toji, i'm sorry. please." you whine, wiggling your ass on his cock. "i don't think you are." he teases, stepping away from you.
you whine, following him. "it was a joke." you press your hand on his chest. "did i laugh?" he tilts his head, smirking at you. you sigh, "toji, i'm sorry." you press yourself against him, your chest touching his.
"fuck." you knew he couldn't resist the feeling of your chest on him. it was like heaven to him. "turn around." he grunts, gripping your hips to turn you around, bending you over.
he easily slid inside of you due to how wet you got over time. "don't say stuff you don't mean, baby." he laughs, thrusting into your backside. it was worth it.
GETO SUGURU (you gave in after implementing it)
you wanted to test geto's limits, giving him an extra nnn moment which made you realize something. it was always you initiating sex. "geto, please. i give up." you whine, following him around the house.
he chuckles, "everyone must deal with their consequences, my love." he turns to you. he plastered a sinister smile, taunting you. he saw how much you needed him but he wasn't caving in until he heard you say it.
"i'll do anything. my hand isn't even working anymore." you simper. it was starting to become frustrating seeing how calm he was about all of this as you were suffering.
"i need you! is that what you wanted to hear?" you shout, earning a grin from him. he walks closer to you, his finger tracing your jawline, "why didn't you say that sooner, love?" he chuckles.
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