#dont take this as me trying to gain pity or anything im going through a mood and just really pissed off at myself 😭

[radlegowaffle]

love bluh bluh bluh

[rommahh]

Better

Word Count: 3.9K

Pairing: Buckybarnesxfem!reader

{This is for @metalbuckaroo's challenge. I had this brewing for a minute but college has got in a chokehold. I chose prompt #30 from the given prompt list. I hope y'all like this read. Love, R}

Bucky trailed behind Y/N as she ignored his calls. Her boots clicked loudly in the small hallway as she rushed towards their shared apartment. Her keys shook in her hand, body tense with anxiety and anger.

Bucky reached her at the door, his hands loosely gripping her arms. Y/N shoved the door open, her body snapping away from his. Y/N haphazardly throws her keys in the small bowl that sat on the hallway side table.

Her chest heaved with deep breaths as she tried to remain calm.

“Y/N please, what is going on? Why are you so mad?” Bucky questioned, slamming the door behind him as his own frustrations started to catch up with him.

“I'm going to bed.” Is all she said to him without even meeting his eyes. She was quick to enter her room and lock the door before he could say anymore. Bucky stood behind her door in confusion. His body still tingled with the lasting effects of the shots he took hours prior.

Sitting on your bed, Y/N finally released. Her shoulders dropped, her body hunching over itself as the tears started flowing.

Y/N had been looking for Bucky for what felt like hours. He was her ride back to the apartment and having been at this party for over four hours- she was exhausted. There was a twinge of disappointment that lingered in her caused by Bucky's disappearance. He invited her to this party tonight but quickly left her to her own devices the moment the both of them walked through the frat’s doors.

The house was mainly empty except for the few lingering bodies that were drunkenly wandering around. She climbed up the stairs that lead to a common room on the second floor. Y/N’s cute white go-go boots were tight on your feet, making her wince at every step. Fashion was a moment type thing, not a four hour long excursion.

Y/N heard a group of voices leading from the common room once you reached the top of the stairs. She listened out waiting to see if she could hear Bucky’s voice before walking through the doors of the common room.

“I don't know why you hang out with that girl Bucky.” Her ears perked at his name. Y/N almost walked through the door but she took a step back to listen to what they were saying.

“Yeah, shes fucking weird.” The group laughed. “I mean look at how she dressed tonight. She’s wearing a costume.”

Y/N looked down at her 80’s inspired dress with a frown. She thought she looked cute tonight, Bucky said she looked cute. She couldn't stop blushing after she heard his words.

“She’s a freak barnes. All she does is follow you around. Are you sure you guys aren't dating?” One of the boys asked with a chuckle. No one said her name yet but she knew they were talking about her. She could tell.

“Y/N’s not that bad. She just doesn't have any friends. I don't like her like that, not my type. She's got that weird anxiety thing.” Bucky's voice finally sounded out from the group. Y/N heart hurt hearing his words. Weird anxiety thing?

“Yeah, making her a freak. So you're just friends with her out of pity? Are you at least getting community service hours?” The group laughed again, Bucky's deep laugh standing out to Y/N.

“You have a lot of strength for a man who's not getting any ass from the girl he's keeping company with. Shes weird as fuck but her body is still bangin. Have you ever copped a feel of her tits? I would hang out with the loser if I got to fuck her too.” Someone commented. Y/N felt bile rise in her throat. She could feel a panic attack approaching having heard the sexual comments about her body. She stepped out from around the wall into the common room. All eyes snapped up to her, some eyes widening in shock. Bucky just looked up, not catching on that his roommate may have heard the horrid words said about her.

“I-im ready to go home, Bucky.” She hadn't looked up from where her feet were rooted on the stained wood floors. Bucky slowly wobbled up from his seat. The rest of the guys watching quietly, some snickering at Bucky's submissiveness.

“Here sweets, you're gonna have to drive.” Bucky says handing his keys over to Y/N. Without looking at him, she snatches the keys from his hands and quickly retreats to his car. Bucky stumbles behind her confused by her attitude.

Y/N walked to Bucky’s car, arms covering whatever they could cover on her body. Her mind telling her she was unsafe, her anxiety telling her even worse things.

Bucky eyes burned from the headache he had. He felt physically ill as he woke up from the living room couch. Last night's activities blur in his mind, no clear memories presenting themselves. He sits up to rest his forearms on his knees trying to calm his bubbling stomach.

The first thing he notices as he comes to his senses is the lack of Y/N’s noise. Normally the small apartment would be filled with the sounds of her sunday playlist as she cleans about. He also doesn't smell her extra dark and strong coffee that she only makes for sundays. He doesnt smell her out of the can cinnamon rolls either that she would normally wake him up with on a small tray with said coffee.

He finds it odd that her presence is lacking in the apartment. Standing, he makes his way over to her room knocking on it slightly. He hears shuffling from the other side but no one comes to open the door.

“Hey sweets, everything ok?” He knocks again to gain her attention.

“I-Im fine Bucky, please go away.” She stutters out to Bucky. Bucky is shocked by her statement not used to being pushed away by her.

“Oh ok, just let me know if you need anything.” He says quietly.

Y/N remained the same way over the next few days. She rarely came out of her room when she was in the apartment leaving Bucky on his own. She stopped making him meals out of kindness or filling up his canisters of water for workouts. She stopped baking him treats as midday pick me ups. She didnt wait for him to get out of classes so they could gossip about what was going on on campus. She didnt bother him at all.

Bucky felt uneasy about Y/N’s silence. He was hurt by her sudden disappearance. Hurt that she could just ghost him without any reason. But there was a reason, Bucky just didnt remember.

Y/N sluggishly walked into the apartment after taking an extensive exam in one of her classes. She tried to walk quietly throughout the apartment to not catch the attention of Bucky. She walks softly on her feet close to the opening of the kitchen.

“Hey.” A quiet voice makes Y/N jump in her spot. Her mission of going unnoticed failed. Bucky leans against the kitchen counter that is parallel to the opening of the kitchen. His feet are crossed in front of him, hands holding a cup of tea.

“Hi.” Her tone matches his. She turns her body to face his, hands fidgeting with each other. She slightly moved from foot to foot, a trait that had been acquired out of nerves. Bucky recognized her tic, his heart constricting at the thought that he might have done something to cause it.

“Y/N, please, what's going on?” Bucky can see that she's not wearing one of her normal outfits that are adorned in bright colors and fun patterns. Instead, her body is covered in a boring sweater that hides most of her body. She wears a large pair of jeans underneath, a belt tightly bounding it to her body.

“Nothing Bucky.” She dismisses. Bucky feels his anger peak. A range of emotion he tried to hide away breaching over its point. He missed his best friend beyond belief and all she could give was a few words.

“It's not nothing Y/N!” He snaps slamming his mug of tea on the counter. Y/N flinches at the sound. Her hands start to shake, not out of fear of Bucky but from unwarranted anxiousness. “I've given you your space but its killing me. I miss you Y/N. I dont get what happened?”

Y/N feels her eyes well up with tears.

“You hurt me Bucky.” It was Bucky’s turn to flinch hearing her words. He hurt her?

“I don't know what I did though.” His voice sounded childlike as he whined.

“At the party, you let your friends talk poorly about me. You-you let them call me a freak and-and weird. They made fun of my clothes and said you were hanging out with me out of pity and you just sat there and laughed James!” Her voice rose with every word. Bits and pieces of that night float around in his head. He can slightly remember the conversation but nothing is clearly showing in his head.

“I'm sorry they said that Y/N but you know that's not true. We both know our relationship, I don't know why you're letting them get to you.”

“They talked about my anxiety. You talked about my anxiety!”

“That's it? That's why you're not talking to me?” He exclaimed throwing his hands in the air.

“You let them sexualize me!” The kitchen filled with an uncomfortable silence. Bucky’s exterior softened.

“What?” His tone was drastically softer than it was earlier.

“You just sat and listened to them as they talked about my body. They talked about my boobs and if youve had sex with me and you said nothing. They said that they would hang with the loser if they could fuck me...How could you let them say that about me?” Y/N whimpered. Her hands cradled her face as she sobbed. Bucky saw the way her chest heaved with each sob, tears forming in his own eyes.

“I didn't know. I wouldn't have let them say those things sober. You have to know that.” He almost fell to his knees pleading for her forgiveness.

“You even said you wouldn't date me. I know its stupid but I thought you liked me back. You told me you loved me. You've taken me out on dates. You've kissed me for goodness sake!”

“I know and I'm sorry. I do like you, I don't know why I said that. I like you so much.” His knees buckled slightly but he held his ground.

“Obviously you dont Bucky. We should just stay away from each other from now on and I won't be renewing my leasing contract at the end of the semester.” She finalizes. Buckys whispers a small no in protest. “You really hurt me, Bucky. I would never let anyone slander you. I respect you too much to allow for someone else to disrespect you.”

With that being said, she gave Bucky one last look over before walking away. Bucky was knocked out of his thoughts at the sound of her door slamming shut and the lock being secured.

Bucky sat on the kitchen floor, the cold tile seeping through his pants to chill his legs. His face adorned with a frown, tears sliding down his warm cheeks. Y/N was his best friend and he ruined it by being a shitty person. He knows he should have defended her, defended their relationship.

Bucky’s rolly chair was his only source of entertainment at his desk in the lobby of the admissions office. Today was a slow day. There were only a few students who came in asking for help finding buildings or looking for the financial aid office. Some high school student came in for tours but his coworkers beat him to doing tours so here he was stuck in the quiet office. He had already stolen a large amount of guest snacks, a cold bottle of tea and a sugar cookie with the school's logo on it.

His chair spinning activities came to a halt when he heard the front door open with a small jingle sounding from it. He took a moment to let the dizziness fade away before he looked up. Bucky felt his breath stop in his throat.

There stood a girl with overalls and a bright colored top. She wore dark green converse, high tops, with frilly socks that peeked from the top. She had large glasses that framed her face perfectly. She was looking around the office, eyes wide with wonder. Her eyes finally met Bucky's, making a large smile appear on her face.

“Hi!” She exclaimed walking up to Bucky’s desk.

“Hey, what can I help you with today?” Bucky asked cooly.

“I just transferred here and I was wondering if you knew where I could apply for on campus jobs?” She placed her hands on top of the counter of Bucky’s desk. He admired her baby blue acrylics that had white flowers on them.

“Oh um, the admissions office is hiring. We do all of the tours for highschool students, or package and mail acceptance letters. Sometimes we plan scholarship events. It's an easy pay type of job. I just sit here and do homework my whole shift.” Bucky answers. “What's your name so I can get my boss to contact you?”

“Y/N Y/L/N.” Bucky quickly scribbled your name on a post it note and stuck it to his laptop as a reminder. “Do you really like this job or are you just trying to pull me in?” She jests with a small smile on her face.

“I mean it's a decent job but im sure with you working here it would make it ten times prettier.” Bucky smirked at the giggle that escaped Y/N. He wasn't normally a flirt but he couldn't help himself with this one.

“Oh really? How many times have you said that line to a girl?” Bucky put a hand to his chest in a fake offense.

“You think too low of me Y/N. I saved that one for the prettiest girl to walk through the door.”

“Hmm, ok. I'll believe it only because my ego needs this boost. Hey, you never told me your name. How am I supposed to write about this encounter in my journal if I don't have your name?”

“My name is James but I prefer if people just call me Bucky. Short for Buchanon, I know it's weird.” Bucky leans back in his chair, arms crossed. He can see her eyes checking out the way his muscles flex underneath his long sleeve shirt. He may have purposefully flexed a little extra for show.

“No, I love it. I dont think ive ever met a Bucky.” She counters. She leans forward, placing her elbows on the counter, her chest pressed against the front of the counter.

“Well I'm glad I'm your first Bucky.” He jokes with a small smile on his face. There was a small moment of silence shared between the two as they just looked at each other. Bucky couldn't help but think about how cute she was as Y/N thought the same thing.

“Oh gosh, I'm probably holding you up from your work.” She snaps out of her little spell rolling her eyes at herself. “I should get going.”

Bucky frowned at the idea of her leave, wanting nothing more than to continue talking to the new girl.

“Right, of course. Maybe I could get your number...so I can notify you about the job.” Bucky proposes. Y/N raises one eyebrow in question, a knowing smile placed on her lips.

“Sure thing bucky.” He hands her a pen and post it for her number. “I wouldn't be opposed to you using this number for things other than work too.” She suggested. She signed her name on the post it note ending it with a small heart.

“I will definitely take you up on that offer. No take backs though when I start sending you random shit.” She giggled, leaning up from her spot. Bucky basked at the sweet sound. He stood up to meet her on the other side of the desk.

“Well Bucky, it was lovely to meet you.” She stuck her hand out for him to shake, he reciprocated the action. Her hands were soft and warm, he thought. She gave him one last smile before walking away.

It was warm outside on the quad as Bucky sat by himself. He sat at the table that would normally be occupied by Y/N and him. Y/N would bring lunch- made by her. Anytime Bucky would try to help her by making lunch she would kick him out of the kitchen. Today, Bucky sat by himself, with no hand made lunch. He had a greasy bag of french fries and a large coke. He planned on eating his sorrows away.

“Hey Bucky!” A voice yelled out to him. Looking up from his fries, Bucky looked towards the sound that broke him out of his fries excursion. Tanner and Logan, his friends from the party, came walking over to him. They both sat down, throwing their lunch onto the table.

“Where's Ms. weirdo?” Tanner asks, mouth full of food. Bucky grimaced at Tanner's manners. He also felt the anger he should have felt on Saturday bloom in his chest.

“She's not weird.” Bucky snapped, fists tightening in his lap. Tanner scoffed, Logan laughing along with him.

“Says you. She is fucking weird. Did you finally get some from her or something? Defending her and shit.” Logan clapped Tanner on his back agreeing with him. “Shit, good for you dude. I would have fucked her a while ago. Probably would have kept her face down so I wouldn't have to see her-”

Before Tanner could finish his sentence, he was thrown from his seat from the powerful punch being landed on his jaw. His feet flew from where he was sitting, landing on his back with a heavy thud.

“Dude what the fuck?” Tanner stood wiping his face from the blood that started to trickle down from his bloody eyebrow. Bucky had never felt anger like this before. His heart was racing, his breathing labored. His cheeks were red and warm, eyebrows turned down.

“No, you don't get to make fun of her and make sexual comments about her.” Bucky snarled. Tanner rolled his eyes, walking closer to Bucky.

“Oh fuck off with that! You didn't defend her this hard on saturday.” Tanner's mistake after his words was shoving Bucky's shoulders back. Bucky reacted quickly by shoving Tanner with even more force.

Tanner threw a punch to Bucky’s jaw, making his head fly back. Bucky tackled Tanner to the ground, throwing punches left and right. Tanner fought back, hands flying landing punches wherever he could land them.

Logan was able to pull Bucky off of Tanner, warning the two that campus police would arrest them if they were caught. Both boys stared at each other fuming. Bucky snatched his trash and his backpack up, the scowl never leaving his face.

“If I ever see you looking or talking to Y/N, I will bash your face in.” Bucky growled.

Y/N felt better today. She found the strength to wear a cute outfit versus the oversized clothes she had been wearing prior out of fear. She didn't want anyone to look at her in any harmful way. She wanted to wear her cute outfits that were sometimes form fitting and short. She liked to wear her cute period pieces that had her own twist on them. She spent many years hating her body and the way she looked. She deserved to feel cute without thinking she is at fault for being sexualized and poorly treated.

She whipped out one of her favorite outfits today, loving the way it fit on her body making her feel confident. Sitting at the front desk of the admissions office, her feet propped up on the desk. Her shift was going by slowly, no one needing assistance this late in the day.

The door burst open making Y/N jump from her seat. She stood up shocked to see Bucky walk in with a huff. He wasn't supposed to work today but here he was. Y/N gasped looking at his cut lip and bruising eye.

“Bucky, what happened?” She maneuvered her way around the desk to stand in front of the beat up boy. She placed both of her hands on his cheeks to examine his injuries. He moved his face away from her tears brimming his eyes.

“I'm sorry Y/N. I'm really sorry. I should have protected you from them. I should've told them not to speak about you that way. You are more than some eye candy for men to act disgusting towards. You are beautiful and eclectic. You have a brilliant mind that shines brighter than anyone elses on this campus.” He spoke to her softly.

“I don't understand Bucky. What made you have this change of heart? You didn't give two shits about me last weekend.” She crossed her arms defensively.

“I know and I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. Maybe it was the alcohol but that's no excuse. I love you. I love all of you. You're not weird. You're your own person and I love everything about you. You do so much for me and I feel like shit for not doing the bare minimum for you.” His words stunned her.

“You love me?”

“God, with everything I have. Since the day you walked in here with those overalls. I've spent the past four years loving you.” Bucky whispered. He grabbed her hand, thumb rubbing over her knuckles.

“I love you too, Bucky.  I really do and I'm hurt. I don't think the hurt will go away for some time. You let them speak horribly about me. If you loved me like I was your girl, you would have defended me.” She spoke sorrowfully.

“I know, I know. I can't change the fact that I did nothing but I can tell you that I'm sorry. I'm always going to protect you. I did today. Tanner may be sporting a nasty goose egg on his eye because of his dumbass words.” Y/N giggled softly, touching his bruising knuckles.

“Thank you, Bucky.”

“I want to go back to normal. I miss you in the mornings and-and during our lunch breaks outside. I miss you.” Bucky stated.

“I miss you too.”

Bucky watched her eyes drop down to his lip, busted and all. He leaned forward slightly hoping she would meet him in the middle. She met him the rest of the way pressing her lips to his. Bucky relished this moment. He relished to be even sharing  moments with the girl he's been in love with since the second he saw her.

“I'm gonna be better, I promise.”

[younghosfavewhore]

mine forever . 1:27am

part 1 [a]   /  part 2 [s]

wc; 1.5k

plot; nctjohnny!boyfriend x femreader!girlfriend

the members of nct have been stirred up in dating rumors and scandals for the past month. when pictures of johnny meeting with a childhood friend begin to float around, you must remind johhny that he’s yours. forever.

prompts; [a]6 “She was nothing to you, was she? Then prove it.”  [a]20 “People talk- people will always talk...” 

warnings; (mentions of TAEYONG’s injury) fluff?!, jealous reader, angsty!!!

My eyes skim over the articles. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. The headlines seemed to drag on forever, “Johnny Suh; NCT’s 5th member involved in Dating Scandal”. Another read, “NCT Johnny Caught with Foreigner; Photos Below” 

photos?

I couldn’t resist clicking the link that my cursor hovered over. The full article was now displayed onto my screen. The pictures loaded for a second, then they were displayed before me. And there it was, Johnny Suh -my Johnny Suh- at a cafe with a blonde-haired foreigner. I continued scrolling, which was probably a mistake, but I was in shock. Certainly they were doctored by some vengeful sasaeng. Another link pops onto my screen, “NCT Johnny Suh has Foreign Girlfriend? VIDEO FOOTAGE”

you’re fucking kidding me. 

A notification sound blares from my phone, the sixth one in the past half hour. I haven’t even picked up my phone, I know what the notifications are. There was no doubt in my mind that it was Johnny texting me a sad excuse for the video that’s now playing on a loop on my screen. I recognized her. Her blonde hair and small frame. It was his high school sweetheart; Madison. In the video -which was only about 8 seconds long- you could see him embrace her. They stood at the cafe table, drinks in hand, about to depart. Johnny’s long arms then spread out, welcoming her into a hug. He initiated it. Even in front of all these people, all these cameras. He hugged her. He knew exactly what he was doing. Another notification sound blared through my phone speaker. Why did this make me feel so threatened? So weak? I pick up my phone <6 unread texts from johnny❤> I open the messages, taking a deep breath as I do so.

johnny❤: baby?

    y/n? text me when you get this.

    ik you see my texts

    i know you’re upset please just text me

    i can explain, i promise…

    im omw to the hotel, we’ll talk when i get there, ok?

My eyes widen at the last text. Why was he on his way here? What made him think that I wanted to see him?

me: dont bother, i dont think i want to see you rn

I send the text with tears welling in my eyes. I was just beginning to fully wrap my head around the events that unfolded before me.

*ding* <1 new text from johnny❤>

johnny❤: please, y/n

  you know me better than anyone, don’t believe these rumors, y/n

Me: i saw the pictures johnny… and the video. what excuse could you have?

My head began to spin, no way did he think I was going to fall for his pity story.

johnny❤: this is why we’ll talk in person

  i have a lot of explaining to do, i know. just listen to me please

  i’m only 2 minutes away, ill explain everything i promise

Take a deep breath. I think to myself, convincing myself that maybe he would have a good excuse. After all, it's Johnny. Would he ever do anything to hurt me? I struggled to gain composure as I heard a familiar knock on the door. The lock clicked and the door crept open. I stood in the living room of the homey suite. 

“y/n..” Johnny’s voice breaks the silence. He peeks from behind the door.

My eyes meet his and I feel faint. What’s going to happen? I ask myself, not knowing the right answer as hundreds of thoughts fill my head.

He continues inside, closing the door softly behind him. He takes slow strides in my direction, and that’s when the tears well in my eyes. Why? I’m not sure, I’ve always been one to get overwhelmed easily, but this was new. His hand reaches out to take mine and I flinch away. The images of him taking another girl into his arms flashing in my head. 

“Why her? How--” My voice breaks and the tears finally fall from my eyes.

“It’s not at all what you think it is, baby.” His voice was soft and genuine. Almost desperate. 

“Then what is it? Huh?” My voice changed from calm to angry. I took a deep breath in an attempt to try to calm myself back down and I back farther away from him. “I... I was patient. I knew this would happen. I was understanding of the rumors, the lies. But this? These pictures? These videos?” I began to lose my cool. “How could you possibly explain this?” Anger was tainting my words, what was I saying? “If you want to be with her then just say that.” I spit the words out.

Johnny looks taken aback, rightfully so. “It’s not like that.”

“Then what is it, Johnny?!” I shouted, menacingly. “It isn’t adding up.” I plead as my voice cracks. “Please, just fucking explain yourself.”

He walks towards me again, I don’t have the energy to fight him anymore. He takes my hand and places a light kiss on it.

“I know you’re confused. I know you’re angry.” He doesn’t take his eyes off of mine. “People talk. In this industry, people talk so fucking much.” His tone was so gentle; he was hurt but still so gentle with me. “People will always talk, okay, y/n?”

I nod, tears streaming down my face at this point. 

“I’m in the wrong here. You saw the videos, I know, but there’s more to it than that.” He sits me down next to him on the couch.

“I just don’t understand.” My voice trembles. “With the other members, Doyoung, Mark, it was just gossip, easily dismissed. But…” My voice trails off.

“I know.” He sighs and pulls me close to him. “Those pictures were taken completely out of context.” where is he going with this? “Yes, it was Madison. And I’m sorry for meeting up with her without telling you, especially with everything that’s been going on…” He traced his fingers in small circles along my back, something he often did when he needed to calm me down. He sighs and pulls me closer to him, we sit in silence for a bit before he continues. “As you know, Taeyong… His injury?”

I nod my head against his chest. “I know…” I whisper in response. what does that have to do with anything?

“Well… Madison, when I met with her at the cafe,” He paused, awaiting a reaction but I didn’t give one. I wanted to hear him out. He continues, “She moved here a few months ago. It has nothing to do with me, or NCT as a whole.” He disclaims. “She’s studying abroad here for a journalist internship. She’s-”

“Get to the point,” I whisper, barely being able to hear him ramble on about her.

He places a kiss on the top of my head. “Everyone knew about Yong’s injury; the managers, the staff, even the stage crew noticed it.” I wince a bit at the thought of Taeyong having to deal with this kind of injury. “You were busy with studies and I didn’t want you worrying about me or the boys. I vented to Madison about it. She explained that she had ties to news sources that could have exposed SM for overworking him. So…” He sighs, “She threatened SM. Unless they gave us all a break or hiatus, she threatened to report it to national broadcasting stations.”

“Wait-” I interrupt him, the puzzle pieces finally fitting together in my head. 

“Let me finish.” He cuts me off in return. “I wanted to treat her to coffee while she was still in town, as a thank you. Nothing more. Because of her, me and the boys were able to finally get a break and Taeyong is finally getting rest.” He explains.

im such a fucking idiot, i think to myself.

I was speechless, how could I have been this stupid. I finally built up the courage to look up at him; his eyes scanning my face for a reaction. 

“I’m sorry.” It’s all I can mutter out in my state of embarrassment. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s ok. I promised to be transparent about this stuff and instead I hid it from you. I’m in the wrong too. I’m sorry.” He replies, softly. His hands trailed up and down my back.

I look into his eyes again, begging for forgiveness without saying a single word. He got the hint and leaned in to press a soft peck to my lips. 

“I love you,” I said, my lips brushing against his as our foreheads rested on each other.

He smiles before kissing me back. “I love you, too.”

“So, she means nothing?” The sudden, whispered, inquiry was cold in the quiet air.

There was a pause, a moment that I nearly regretted asking.

“She means nothing.” He said, his voice was gruff and direct.

“Then prove it.” The words rolled off my tongue, and before I had time to think, Johnny’s lips were pressed back up against mine.

[iamthatmf-donttestme]

WAS ANY OF IT TRUE ???

(wrath and emilia had an argument earlier and the argument is getting them nowhere but neither of them will let it go and would say the other person is right but with a✨twist ✨ at the end

P.S:I WOULDN'T EXACTLY CALL IT A TWIST BUT....HERE YOU GO )

He smirks ..the audacity this demon has !!

"Hush witch you're making a scene out of nothing"

"ok listen demon none of this would be a problem and i wouldn't be yelling if u just say that u are wrong and apologise ".

One of his brows arched perfectly ,tilting his head slightly he said"Hmm ,i don't remember starting this conversa-argument which u are clearly trying to have one with me out of spite"

I scoffed "Out of spite .Curse my already cursed life .You ,demon, very well know that we would not be having this argument if it weren't for you".

"Me??? Im the reason for you wasting my time ???"

"Oh miei dei ...wasting your time !!!Do you think that it is ideal for me that I wanted to waste my time with YOU instead of finding my sister's murderer who might be out there while trying to stay alive in a demon realm- THE HELL ..."my voice trailed off .

I didn't take note of when he started to move towards me with something in his eyes something that i could not decipher his gaze held something so pure ..but with the wicked you can never be sure so i knew i want going to let him off the hook this easily .Hesitantly i spoke ".......for all i know me wasting your time will only save another girl's soul if you've made a similar deal with any one of your brothers like u did with PRIDE "but my words came out in a broken tone .

For all the times i thought that Wrath was the only person i could be with amidst all the folly in life ,the one who ran me a bath with my favourite flowers after LUST broke me even though it was for his own gain but still he was there wasn't he and i still don't know why he did what he did when he knew how much I -

I was pulled away from my thoughts when a pair of big,warm palms covered both of my wrists placing them on his chest ;I can feel his heart pounding against his chest like rain on the windows on those stormy days in SEA AND VINE ;the thought of home bringing more tears .But it incited more anger in me and i knew that it wasn't his doing .I don't know how mama,nonna,papa are doing where they are,and if they're safe . And WRATH reminding me a lot of home .....I've always known that home was not a place but a feeling and he was giving me that ..the wicked !!!the malgavi!!! i should be scared of him shouldn't i?? i shouldn't feel this way ;hes a demon he will make a fool out of me the second he wants to get something from me like a heartless creature like those girls like Vittoria and I still haven't found the murderer but here i am feeling home ,feeling safe in the presence of the demon that broke my trust but i cant help it neither can i stop feeling guilty ...I-

"Do you think it's was easy for my ..is easy for me Emilia ?.." he said ,his words putting a stop to the chaos in my head but at the same time i couldn't help but wonder what he meant so i asked him .

"Breaking your trust ,putting you in a situation where u had to push me away ,being so close to you yet so far from you ???Do u think i want this ??ANY OF THIS ??"

"What do you want then ??"I questioned him.

"YOU .You being near me ,your warmth ,you beautiful smell surrounding me ,your lips saying my name .ANYTHING .I would give anything to have that .Before i made this absurd deal i didn't know how much of a big part you would become of me .But trust me EMILIA i cannot back down from this deal even if i wanted to ...But i will get you out of this ..just trust me ...I will come and get you when the time is right and help you attain you goal until then I pity PRIDE and his servants "he said ."You don't need me protection to tackle the wicked if you just think about their strategy and your reaction as strategy to theirs.Just think rationally ."

"But u promising me that u will get me out of here without being hurt by your brothers is thinking irrationally ,Wrath and that isn't like you- THE DEMON PRINCE OF WAR"

"The thing is ,my dear witchy EMILIA,I cant seem to think rationally when it comes to you which is I know very unlikely me .Do you really want to go back to ITALY ,the human realm .....would you go if you had a chance ???"he asked .

The promises he made the words that came out of his mouth the truth his heavenly beautiful golden eyes reflected ...I couldn't think properly and I started to feel dizzy as his words started echoing through my ears making my heart pound .He was the same WRATH the one who saved me that night in front of me .My fingers caressed his chest right where his heart was pounding underneath my touch .

But before i could say anything i saw a reflection on his golden eyes a figure standing still behind a column without knowing that actual meaning of spying and i couldn't risk it so i said,

"Yes i would but there is no other way not a chance for me to do that so don't waste your precious time on me while you could be cursing the world with your presence". I spat and yanked my hands off from his wrists that held mine over his chest .And after hearing those words he looked ....proud??T he figure seemed to have moved away and Wrath looked restless and i turned to look who that was but Wrath moved forward only to see that there was no one there .

"Congratulations, witch. You are using that small brain of yours I see and you can thank me any time for being that great of a teacher "he said proudly.

"Wrath ,was any of it true ...any one of the words you said to me ...was it true ..or .....??"i trailed off

He opened and closed his mouth .And he closed his eyes and took a deep breath as if choosing his words carefully ,he said,in a vulnerable tone "You will know when the time is right witch ."

"Think rationally wrath .If making promises that you cannot fulfill is your strategy then it is predictable like the sun rising every morning "

Just before he could say anything his brother ,my betrothed,PRIDE's trusted messenger made a dramatic entrance .

WRATH bent down to my ear and whispered "Silly witch ,I don't make promises I cant keep ."I scoffed at that.

"You will see that in the future .....u adorning a throne that doesn't belong to anyone of my brothers and another teacher's tip all your moves are being watched just like we were being ALMOST the entire time " he whispered only for me to hear . ALMOST the entire time what was that supposed to mean ???Before i could ask him about it a large palm rested on my back and i looked to see PRIDE glaring at his brother and WRATH glaring back at him but stopped once he noticed i was watching him and changed his gaze into his signature cold one .

"Prince WRATH spending your time with OUR QUEEN . "PRIDE'S messenger said.

"She maybe BETROTHED to your KING but she is still a member of my house and i always make sure what's mine stays protected"WRATH shrugged.

"Oh Your highness don't you worry she will be protected ...BY YOUR BROTHER "

"Oh for the sake of the goddesses stop it .I don't need any protection from anyone of you .If you two doltish demons think that I need protection remember that I summoned a demon prince on my own and have powers of my own .And if someone needs anyone here keep in mind that you BOTH need me ".

At the sound of my voice ringing through the place PRIDE'S messenger turned completely facing me and WRATH gave me a subtle nod when i made my point .

"It is my order and my honour to keep you safe my queen ."with that pride's messenger moved towards me and held his hand out as a gesture saying after you started walking me down the corridor ,taking me wherever his destination was .I took smaller steps so i could be in the presence of the devil i knew than the one i didnt.

But i couldn't help but wonder if anything ANYTHING wrath said were true .If we were being watched almost throughout our moment and wrath does not make promises he cant keep then when did the spy start spying on us .

I turned to look back at wrath only to see him glaring at messenger knowingly .And the messenger smirked at me .

"Oh don't fuss , my .It was me .All me .You see the KING had a feeling WRATH might be turn you into a weapon of his ,destroying US from the inside turns out and he was right "he gloated ." Prince Wrath calling you by your first name as if he had done than before and will ever consider calling you that let alone calling you with endearments."

I wanted to laugh soo badly at that .He did call me EMILIA by my name in front of fratello Antonio .MY EMILIA he said .Heat rushed to cheeks at that memory.But i did not say anything and continued to played along.

"How long were you there ?" I asked .

"Oh right when he called DEAR WITCHY EMILIA and I knew you had your limpidity intact when you turned him down .Our brilliant Queen ". He said .His words were like a splash of cold water to my face ,i did not have my sanity intact when wrath said that .

"when did u leave and make your appearance again ??" i asked

"Oh i left the second you turned him down ,to go to our KING and tell that his brother thought that he could trick you and came back when i did ".He answered .The thing about the messenger was that he once said he wouldn't lie to if not necessary(i.e if pride approved and that is the necessity-his king's approval) and i was sure that he wasn't lying about this because he thought he won he thought he knew all that happened,his pride at its peak.

But the important thing is that if i had to choose between wrath or pride it will be wrath because devil you know than the devil you dont .And I knew that if I had a way to survive in hell it is to play with pride while still feeling wrath's presence .

When i looked back again at wrath who leaned against a column just few steps away , i only saw the wickedly ,sickening,cunningly beautiful smirk adorning his face like the messenger has just thought what he wanted him to think .

And when he saw me he only gave me an angelic smile making my heart race .

He mouthed 'sono fiero di te' (I'm proud of you ).It was as if him and i had an understanding without words to convey them and i knew that if i am to survive in hell i should be cunning like the rest like weighing in on wrath's impromptu plan to save myself tonight and my freedom which i must have in order to bring justice to the murders of those innocent girls .

AND IM SOO SORRY THAT MY FIRST FIC IS THIS LOONNGG I WAS JUST IN THE MOMENT IG BUT FEEL FREE TO TELL ME HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THIS ONE .

i m not soo sure about my writing might take it down later ig but imma post it anyways soo plz dont be mean.

[tittty-bitty]

Nemuri struts from store to store like an empress gracing her presence on her citizens. Really it was businesses being graced with one of her clients limitless creditcards and her impulse shopping. Who ever invented financial domination was a mastermind.

“Come along darling! Just a few more shops then we can be done!”

“You know Miss Midnight, when you said you needed help with extra curriculars, I didnt think it would make me a pack mule for your personal spending habits.”

“Your still a pillar of peace! It’s just now you have a metal hook for me to hang my shopping bags on.”

She looked over her shoulder to see Yagi struggling with the shopping bags. Yagi isn’t weak by any means, even with out his quirk. She’s seen him spar with Shota plenty of times. Which is totally just two coworkers sparring for exercise Shota claimed, with no sexual tension at all thank you very much. But any one would struggle with that many bags, especially a man with only one lung.

They manage to make it into Gucci with out any lungs popping. Yagi sprawls on one of the ottomans with a poof and start to rub his wrists. She starts to look at the purses and leather belts. Not even glancing at the price tag before adding them to her haul. When she goes back to the waiting section she glances at Yagi. Who is scrolling away on his smartphone. Despite losing over 200 pounds of muscle, he was still an attractive man. Sharp cheek bones, piercing eyes, and such a sweet smile. His handsome features multipled when he gained more confidence in this form. Everyone could see after the truth was out about Allmight that he wasn’t comfortable in his true form. Scared to talk to other adults, skiddish and horrifically terrified of making mistakes. Not including how he obviously avoided reflections and wore only baggy outfits. But a year after his retirement and him making friendships with his colleges at UA, he finally started accepting himself and it’s amazing on the amount of progress he’s had. She’s so proud of her coworkers, especially her boys to make Allmight’s retirement less lonely. Even if one is especially passionate with the task but wants to be an edgy teenager about it.

Despite the progress the man made, he still didn’t know how to dress himself for shit. He may of got himself a few outfits that arnt 5X but he still loves to drown in his clothing. If she has to be assaulted with that damn yellow suit one more year she’s going to ask young Todoroki to set it on fire for extra credit.

If only he would wear clothes that actually fit him. Show off his long neck, his collar bones, long legs narrow waist, she could go on and on about why Yagi needs a new wardrobe. She needed to show the world how Yagi is still a fine ass man. She has checked him out countless times to be confident with that claim. There was one day where he had to actually put on pants that fit him way too well after a coffee spill and had to borrow some pants from mic. She doesn’t understand how a man so skinny could still have an ass. Nothing to go over the moon about but it was so cute, so perky for a man his age. It almost distracted her from the front, his buldge which is probably the one thing that stayed the same from his Allmight form. It was extremely hard to maintain eye contact with him that day. Not that she was complaining about the eye candy, the yellow sleeping bag that pretended to sleep on the floor didn’t seem to mind either.

While thinking about the potential of jokes about Yagi’s pillar of peace to bring up in front of Shota later, Nemuri comes across a sweater. The sweater was a high quality wool, cream colored with some green trim on the collar that goes down to a v. It would be perfect for his form, a little snug but still covered everything to start him off slow. The arms a little long for the average person but perfect for his long arms. The bottom might come up a little short though. Showing off his midriff when he reached up. Potentially showing a nice v of his hips, maybe even a nice little trail of blond that dips into his pants. Oh the thought of sweet little Yagi in a crop top is intoxicating. But baby steps. She needed him to trust her with fashion first before she tries anything to scandalous.

He was still reading on his phone when Nemuri grabs the tall man by the wrist and yanks him out of his seat. With a cute little yelp he is brought up to his feet and shoved into a changing room with the sweater being thrown at him.

“Your not coming out till you put this on.” Nemuri says as she chucks over some black jeans to go with it.

After watching awkward arms reach above the door and listening to the general struggle of a man menuvering in a changing room that doesn’t accommodate him, he steps out. His black blue eyes shine in contrast with the creme color of the sweater. Giving off a sweet older man who waters flowers in the community garden than his usual look of a man who got lost in a deflated blimp.

“Oh my god honey you look so sweet.”

He checks himself in a mirror and twists to see the back. She could see his ribs poking through the fabric wile it rides up his toned stomach not as much as she hoped unfortunately. But the fitting pants made up for it. Although they don’t show off his front for the sake of the students and people who actually want to get work done in the teachers lounge, it still shows off that cute little ass of his, and that’s all she can ask for.

Yagi actually holds his attention to his reflection of the mirror. Giving the look an actual chance. From the relaxed look in his eyes, he might actually like it.

“I never thought I would wear a wool sweater like this again. I forgot how warm and comforting they are.”

Nemuri comes up in front of him and adjusts the collar for him, opening it up a bit so his collar bones peek out a little. “I can’t imagine the amount of sheep needed to make a sweater for Allmight.”

He chuckles at the comment and how her nails tickle his chest, now used to her touchy nature. “It was in high school. My mentor forced them on me when she found out that my foster home didn’t try too hard to find winter clothes that fit me.”

He rubs the end of the sleeve to feel the texture, smiling slightly, reminiscing the memories he had with her when wearing the sweaters. It was always interesting to hear about his life when he was young. He was usually guarded when it came to anything about himself before his hero days, so to hear any little tidbit about him was to be met with a neutral yet encouraging reaction.

“Well I’ll be sure to make her proud by making sure that your fabric needs are taken care of.” Nemuri says while coming around behind him and placing her hands on his shoulders, admiring his smile in the mirror. “And I can make sure she rests peacefully by getting rid of that ugly yellow suit.”

He looks up from his sleeve. “Hey! I love that yellow suit!”

“You look like the noodle balloons that are outside of a car dealership. Im no longer letting my dear friend to walk around looking like a mustard bottle.”

Yagi takes the light roast with little grace with a small groan. He looks down at his wrist to look at the tag. He reads it with a puzzled look.

“I think we need to call an associate. I think they’re missing a decimal on the price-“

“Alright! Time to head out! I’ll meet you outside the store!” She shoves the bags in his hands, rip the tags off his wrist and waist and hurries to the counter.

“Ah. I can pay for my own clothes-“

“Nope! This is my treat! You can pay me back by meeting me at the car!”

Yagi looks at the minimum of 20 bags in his hands and accepts his fate. Trudging his way back to the car with the mini fortune in toll.

———

“Alright come on this is our last shop.”

“Ya no. I think I’ll wait in the car.”

“Dont worry, this place is very professional and no one will mention you being here. They are very strict about privacy. Also it will stop random men from asking me out.”

Yagi goes over the definition of professional in his head as he walks into a sex shop named “The Bimbo’s Boneyard”. It was suprisingly sleek inside despite the name. Defiantly one of the more higher end sex stores he’s been to. It was similar to a tech store with all the LED lights and plexiglass display boxes. It would be less weird if some of them didn’t have sex dolls that were determined to stare him down.

He decided to walk away from the display, trying to find something to look at with out actually looking at anything. His eyes catch a box with a cute little cat on it. He smirks a little. It reminds him of the stray cat that lives in the brush that’s on the way to campus from the dorms. He would give it pets every morning and eventually leave cans of food every morning. One morning he found a hunched black blob taking a nap on the grass. He was about to ask the obvious homeless man if he wanted his bento when he realized it was his coworker Aizawa. Sleeping on the cold ground at 5:30 in the morning with a cat that, while a sweet heart, was probably ridden with fleas.

“Excuse me sir, the food bank is on the other side of town.”

“I know but they were offering a cash prize for who ever found the dementia patient that ran away from his nursing home. Looks like I just found him.”

He chuckled at the memory. When their odd friendship really started to bloom. Not only with Aizawa, who while he was probably the closest too, took the longest compared to his other coworkers. He loved talking to Mic about classic American rock and fighting with him on how Nikki is so much better than Cardi. He loved trading tea with Thirteen as they go on about a new show Yagi has no clue what their talking about, but loves the passion. And Nemuri, who took pity on him the first day and decided to spoil him with attention and gifts that mostly ranged from sugar free candys and cute pens. It makes him feel like a toddler more than anything, but he thinks it’s sweet. He just never expected to have so many friends after Allmight was gone. He half thought if Nighteyes prediction didn’t kill him, then his loneliness will.

“My my my, I must say I’m surprised.”

Toshinori shook out of his self reflection and looked at his friend.

“I had my theories but I must say I never expected pet play from you. To think I thought you were just a vanilla cradle robber.”

He flushed with shock in confusion. Only to find that the box with the cat he was staring at for the past 2 minutes was for a bundle for a cat headband, a leash, mouth gag, and plug tail.

Absolutely horrified Yagi stammers to regain his reputation of role model rather than creepy old man. “Shit! No! No! I was just looking at the cute cat!”

“There’s no need to be ashamed, I am a professional after all. If you ever want to talk about that kind of stuff with me, I’m always open for questions.” She assured him calmly. “I’m gonna go to the check out if you want to look at the other options. I will say that you would look a lot better with the black ears.” She struts off with a few leather tools and some weird egg looking balls.

“There’s nothing for me to fucking look at because I’m not interested in that! Wait.. WHAT DO YOU MEAN CRADLE ROBBER?” He stomps off to catch up with her.

————

The staff Christmas party is filled with decorations, overworked teachers and spiked eggnog. Coworkers chatting and playing games as the snow falls outside. Yagi is chatting with Aizawa about how much Nezu is going to lose in poker after he demands people play with him. He takes a sip of his sugar free hot cocoa, very glad that his friends get a well deserved break.

“Merry Christmas Yagi!” Thirteen shouted as they shove a fancy bag in his face.

“Oh thank you Thirteen! I hope you didn’t spend too much on me.

“Oh no it wasn’t me!” Thirteen corrected. “Midnight was your secret Santa. She said she’s a little too tipsy to walk in her heels right now and asked me to give it to you.”

He looks past the smaller teacher and sees Nemuri in a tight red dress and tall stilettos. Giving him a wink when she notices him receiving her present.

He smiles and waves back at her. He pulls out the first item from the bag. An expensive looking cologne. He brings it up to his nose and gets notes of Cuban cigars and vannila. He sees a little tag attached to the bottle. With lovely cursive script it read “Garenteed to even get the angriest cats purr~”

He reads the tag as he hands the cologne to Aizawa. Shota sniffs the bottle and his eyes roll back a little bit. Obviously enjoying the scent.

“Wow she picked out something that matches your pretentious persona.”

“Maybe you can ask her to pick out some bar soap that you desperately need.” Yagi rebuttles without even looking up. Still trying to figure out what the tag ment.

“Is there something else in there? If not that’s a heavy bottle.” Thirteen comments before being passed the cologne to take a sniff.

Oh ya, maybe look at the rest of the gift before over analyzing the card. He opens the bag wider and is smacked in the face with realization on what the message ment. His blush going to his ears as he looked at the “Kinky Kat Play” bundle that he repressed from his memory. He looks up at Nemuri with shock as he finds her staring at him. Raising her glass with a smirk as she turns back to her pile of chips and angry, losing boss.

He shuts the bag quickly before Thirteen and Aizawa gets a chance to peek. “Ahhh ah. It’s a very personal gift that I don’t want everyone to know about.”

“Alright I understand.” Shota replies. He turns to Thirteen. “Thirteen get your hand vacuum ready.” The nosy prick demands as he lunges for the bag. Thank god for these stupidly long arms as he gets the bag out of Shota’s reach.

“It’s none of your fucking buisness you asshole!” Yagi cries as he goes on his toes as Shota climes him like a tree. Thirteen is giggling at their weird friendship while not helping anyone. Yagi would rather die than have the present be shown to his coworkers and worst of all Shota, who would NEVER let this go.

While he hates to do it, he’s desperate, and it has to be done.

The sickly man expands his diaphragm in such a way where when he coughs, he gets enough blood out of his mouth to put on a show. He makes a display of coughing and catching his breath. Blood covering his hand and dripping out of his mouth. He goes a little too far by making his hand shake but he needed extra sympathy points.

It seems to do the job as Thirteen rushes to his side to support him. “Shota you know you can’t be to rough with him.”

Aizawa stares at both of them in disbelief, then back at Yagi. “You are not seriously trying to play the sick old man card right now.”

Thirteen loops Yagi’s arm around their shoulders.“Shota you were to rough on him. The man has no stomach and only one lung. You should know better as a professional.”

“A professional knows when someone is faking when said person has no problem taking and dealing punches while sparring, but suddenly can’t handle a few grabs.” He cannot believe Yagi is trying to make an escape route by making Aizawa look like the asshole that beats up sick old men.

“You don’t need to defend me Thirteen.” Yagi says, adding a little tremble to his voice. “He just can’t handle losing to an old man. Could we go to the office? My nebulizer is in there.” The asshole making sure to add some pity coughs at the end.

“Of course Yagi.”

Shota stares openly in shock on what happening in front of him. Not only at Yagi’s pathetic stunt over something stupid, but Thirteens naiveté.

“A nebulizer treats asthma! Not bleeding lung asshole!” Shota shouts like an absolute child.

As he watches the duo walk, no sorry, LIMP to the office, he sees Yagi readjust his arm. To give an undeniable middle finger to Shota behind Thirteens head. The shameless bastard smiling back at him.

[jiilys]

good crimes

also on ao3

//

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: do u think i should get a fringe

Sirius Black: depends if u want james to fuck you again

Lily Evans: harsh

Lily Evans: a fringe wont effect my GREAT boobs

Lily Evans: ive rung mar im doing it anyway get fucked

Sirius Black: have fun becoming a born again virgin just to spite me

//

“Do you think Jane Austen could’ve written more convincingly about love if she’d been married?”

Sirius, lying on his bed scrolling through Twitter and ignoring Remus’ emails, didn’t look up.

“Jane Assrim?”

“Jane Austen,” Lily flopped onto the bed and made Sirius drop his phone down the side of it. “I’ve just read the most infuriating article”

Sirius, phoneless, not quite ready to let the joke go: “Jane Offramp, did you say?”

“- think you have to married to write about love? Is it a fucking prerequisite? And what does ‘write convincingly about love’ even mean? Like Sense and Sensibility isn’t fucking incredible-”

“That was a good movie.”

Lily turned to him, “I know you read the book.” He had, but only because it was cheaper than getting Lily a birthday present last year.

“He said Sense and Sensibility would’ve been more convincing if Jane was married?”

“Yes. I mean, I’m paraphrasing, but yes.”

“She wasn’t?”

“No. Do you listen when I talk?”

“Not if I can help it.”

“Pity. Maybe then you’d be better at pub quizzes.”

“One time!” Sirius shoved his hand down the side of the bed, grasping for the phone, “One fucking quiz! I’d had eleven gins!”

“It was seven gins”

“Thirteen gins!”

“Seven, at best.” Lily sat up, “I don’t know what to do about this, I’m thinking about scrapping my entire thesis to exclusively write about why this guy sucks one.”

Sirius finally grasped the phone, “That sounds unwise.”

“We won’t know till I’ve tried it.”

“I think we know now.”

“Buzzkill. Go have another gin.”

//

Sirius Black to Lily Evans: you home for dinner tonight

Lily Evans: ill be in

Sirius Black: im going to combine spaghetti and baked beans in a pot and make spaghetti beans  

Lily Evans: im out

Sirius Black: ive bought wine

Lily Evans: back in

//

“You’re not naked in there are you!”

“Why would I be naked?”

Sirius poked his head around the door holding a cup of tea. Lily was sat on the bed, laptop open, fully clothed. He ventured inside. “’Heard Potter and didn’t want to interrupt kinky shit.”

“We’re trying to decide how to email my landlord about mowing the lawn,” James’ voice, crackly, through the laptop, “But if that does it for you Black I’m not judging.” He’s wearing a top that is definitely Remus’ and hasn’t bothered to button it.

“Have you brought me a tea?” Lily asked, sweetly.

“No. I came to ask if you knew where the sieve was and Potter’s out here with his shirt undone like this is a porno.”

“Sorry for turning you on this early.” James said, gleeful.

Lily leant back against her pillows. “Give me the tea and I’ll tell you where the sieve is”

James, the traitor, laughed. Sirius squinted. “Are you kidding.”

Lily held out a hand and after taking a second to weigh his options (leave, sieveless, back at square one or hand over the tea, make a new one, gain sieve). Sirius gave her the mug.

Lily blew on it. “We don’t have a sieve” She said, solemnly, and James howled. Sirius lunged for the tea.

“Kidding!” Lily swooped it out of his reach as James continued to make inhuman noises that were surely annoying at least half of the California population, “Top drawer above the oven!”

//

Unknown to Lily Evans: lill

Unknown: its siriius

Unknown: am out lost phone pls call uber

Lily Evans: where are you

Unknown: nandos on main

Lily Evans: the one where i broke my heel or the one you and james are banned from

Unknown: banned

Lily Evans: number plate is JKY879 u have three minutes  

Unknown: thank u lpve u

//

James Potter to Sirius Black: call me

Sirius Black: you call me

Sirius Black: im not paying three pounds a minute for you to tell me to check my email

James Potter: its not abt emails

James Potter: we’ll bill it to the company

Sirius Black: we are the company

Sirius let the phone ring four times before he picked up. “’Bill it to the company’ are you mad?”

“I’ve literally left a meeting to ring you and you can’t even pick up quickly. What was the name of that guy from that 2014, that investor, hated us-”

“All of them.”

“But he liked Remus-”

“Again, all of them.”

“-had that terrible tie, remember? It had birds on it and his last name was, like, ‘brain’ or something and he got really shitty when we wouldn’t stop going on-“

“Harvey Brain. Pronounced Bry-an” Sirius said, instantly, “We nicked those mints they had in reception.”

“Brilliant. ‘Ring you when I’m out of this.”  

//

“You look terrible” Sirius said to Lily, who did.

“The fringe does not react well to heat.” She opened the fridge and stuck her head inside it.  

Sirius, in a show of great maturity, did not say ‘I told you so’. Lily, who knew he was thinking it, said “Shut up” anyway, so what was the point.

//

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: so help me god. if the dishwasher isnt empty when i get home. i will murder you. actual and full death will come your way

Lily Evans: this is not a joke i will actually kill you sirius

Sirius Black: mark zuckerdick if ur reading these she rlly is threating me

Sirius Black: call mi6

Lily Evans: ill happily go to jail if people empty the dishwasher there  

//

“I need you to come get me-“

Lily sat up, “Who is this?”

“Fuck off” Sirius’ voice, annoyed, vaguely drunk but mostly not, “I know you know”

“I was asleep.”

“You don’t sleep.”

She avoided that. “What happened?”

“Bar. Fight. He started it.”

“Oh really.”

“Believe me, would you?”

“I try but it’s hard seeing as I know you.”

“Don’t tell the boys. I’m in Croydon.”

“Croydon?”

“Don’t start. I’ll pay your cab fare.”

“You won’t”

“I will. Be quick.”

Lily, already with shoes on, “I’m not even out of bed”

“Liar.”

“Do I need bail money?”

“I’m at the hospital”

“What?” Lily’s heart, suddenly in her knees.

“Bruised ribs. It’s nothing. They won’t let me walk out alone.”

“Hospital?-“

“Some snitches. Black eye. It’s nothing. You should-“

“Don’t say ‘see the other guy’-“

“I was going to say ‘see me’ by which I mean hurry up-“

“Ungrateful!” Lily pulled on a fresh shirt, hands reaching for her house keys, “Watch yourself or I won’t come.”

“You bloody will.”

“Yeah.” Reaching for the door handle, “hey-“

“Yeah?”

“No murders?” their dumb code meaning, you good? Meaning: do I have to kill for you? Meaning: I would, just say.

“No murders.”

“See you in forty, don’t say-“

“Speed.”

“Asshole. I hope I get every light.”

//

Lily Evans to we’re not calling the company massivesoft: remus tell potter anytime he wants to talk to me and not my boss i am available

Remus Lupin: isn’t he talking to you??

Lily Evans: he always rings me on the work phone hes been talking to narelle for fifteen minutes  

James Potter: dont be jealous that narelle and i have a special relationship

Lily Evans: didnt think my greatest threat would be my 57 year old boss and yet

Remus Lupin: yeah i had bets on sirius

Sirius Black: honestly me too fuck up narelle

//

“Would it fucking kill you to remember anything-“

“Moony, hold on-“

“I’m serious-“

“Actually I’m-“

“Fucking don’t I swear to Christ-“

Sirius grinned, rubbing sleep out of his eyes, “I forgot, shit- I forgot about the call, I’m sorry.”

Remus sighed, bone-deep and familiar, “I need you on those things. Otherwise I just get-“

“- Walked over.”

“Out-negotiated-“ He sighed again.

Sirius bit his lip, “Did it go well?”

“I rescheduled. I can’t do that shit without you.”

He smiled. “World’s worst lawyer.”

“This is business. It requires a blind confidence and ability to bullshit which-“

“- I contain in multitudes.”

“Look at you, quoting me.”

“If you were any good at business you’d bill me for that.”

Remus snorted. Sirius could picture it, Remus, exhausted, rubbing his face over his computer, almost laughing. “I am sorry about missing the call.”

“I know.” Remus, leaning back against his office chair, head to the ceiling, phone to his ear. Sirius could feel it like a toothache. “It’s bullshit that you’re not here. If you were here I could force you onto the phone.”

“Oh Moony, it’s almost like you miss me.”

“It’s this heat, it’s making me fucking crazy. How are you, anyway? Lil said she’s growing out the fringe due to your bullying.”

//

Sirius Black to Lily Evans: what the fuck is in the fridge

Lily Evans: is this about the bird

Lily Evans: the neighbours cat was eating it!! i had to bring it inside

Lily Evans: the bin was full and we’re out of bags i didn’t know where else to put it

Lily Evans: i thought if i left it out it would start to smell

Lily Evans: I wrapped it up!! i couldn’t just leave it!!

Lily Evans: can’t believe im getting roasted for caring about nature

Sirius Black: was actually talking about the skim milk but glad we got the bird thing out of the way

//

“Mar’s coming round,” Lily said, “She’s bringing wine.”

“I thought you had that test thing.” Sirius was eating sour cream with a spoon right out of the pot.  

“That was today, it went fine. But Nathan sent Mar a follow request on Instagram, then messaged her on Facebook to ask if she’d gotten it.”

“Hence the wine.”

“Yeah, he’s not blessed with your moves.” Two years ago, drunk on New Year’s Eve, Marlene and Sirius had fucked in Remus’ bed. This was a source of constant amusement for everyone, except briefly for Remus while it was occurring.

“What I have can’t be taught.”

“But it can be caught,” Lily took the sour cream out of his hands, “You’re foul. We’re making popcorn.”

//

Lily Evans to Sirius Black: remus just told me what him and james call us

Sirius Black: is it not our names

Lily Evans: the lady and the tramp

Sirius Black: HA

Sirius Black: found my next tattoo

//

“Your party sucks.” Lily said, shutting the sliding door. Inside, she hears a glass break.

“Most of them are your friends.” Sirius, chain-smoking over the balcony, didn’t look over. Lily walked over to stand next to him.

“It’s the music that’s the problem.” Mary’s voice, mixed in with thumping drum and base, seeped under the door, apologising about the glass. The balcony was littered with cigarette butts. “Twenty-three, Black. You’re proper old now.”

“Tell me about it.”

“We need some Springsteen.” She said, which actually meant we need James. “Whose playlist is this? Where’s Born to Run?” Sirius doesn’t say anything.

The horrible thing was, when James had first told her about the Visa issue she’d thought it was funny. It was funny, to everyone, at the time. Sirius, on some USA Visa watchlist because of some prank he’d pulled on this mother at fourteen that grounded two planes and killed four seagulls. Now, in the dark, in this year, it seemed entirely less funny. James and Remus in Silicon Valley, setting up the company for real and Sirius, left behind. Eleven again, still.

He flicked his cigarette to the floor and crushed it with his foot, still hunched over the railing. Lily put her head on his shoulder and hummed the chorus of ‘Hungry Heart’ quietly, and Sirius is pulled back to this year, twenty-three, with broken glass inside the flat, grounded again.

//

James Potter to exclusively business: god this accountant smells like cheese

Sirius Black to exclusively business: that’s not very businessesy

James Potter: ur right

James Potter created the group cheesy accountant

James Potter added Sirius Black, Remus Lupin

Sirius Black: are you seeing the accountant for the business though??

James Potter: god right again

James Potter created the group exclusively cheesy accountant business

James Potter added Sirius Black, Remus Lupin

Remus Lupin: is this why ur in the goddamn bathroom james get back here

Sirius Black: does he smell like cheese moons

Remus Lupin: it is pungent yes

//

“The service here is terrible.” Sirius said, slumping on the counter and looking awful.

“He means can we please have some fries.” Marlene said, looking marginally better, wearing Sirius’ jacket.

“Funny,” Lily skated over, “Didn’t sound like it.”  

Marlene grinned, “Rollerblades day?” Sirius’ head jerked up.

“Jay’s here so Narelle is making us.” Lily said, flatly, and pretended to charge them, “Swipe your card, or something.”

“Every day should be rollerblades day.” Sirius was recovering quickly, “No one rocks The Blades like you do-“

Lily ignored him. “At least pretend to swipe a debt card Mar, what is that?”

Marlene held it up, “My library card.”

“I’m going to start calling you ‘Blades’, recognise your talent-“  

“Go away.” Marlene and Lily said, nearly in unison. Sirius held his hands up and slunk off.

“He was basically in a coma this morning,” Marlene swiped her library card, pretended to type a pin, “I had to drag him here, this is giving me an error notice by the way.”

“Stop pressing buttons, was it a good night?”

“It was alright. I lost him” she jerked her thumb to Sirius, collapsed against a table, “But ended up seeing him later. Wish you were there- I think I’ve broken this machine. It won’t give me my card back-“

“Christ, how have you done this-“

“Me? It’s your machine-“

“When are you even at the library-“

“Are you saying I can’t read-“

“What? When did I say that-“

“I’ll pull this side, you pull the other-“

“That is a terrible idea-“

“Ready?”

Sirius, appearing from nowhere, yanked the card out in one swift motion and presented it to Marlene. “McKinnon, I didn’t know you couldn’t read.”

//

Lily Evans to James Potter: you awake

James Potter: its two over there go to bed

Lily Evans: yeah yeah

Lily Evans: wanna hear my voice

James Potter: god yeah

James Potter: give me two minutes im about to go through a tunnel ill ring you

Lily Evans: see you on the other side

Lily Evans: ‘god yeah’

Lily Evans: you wont get this till ur out of the tunnel but shit im mad for you

//

Lily hit Sirius in the face with her bag strap, “Wake up.”

He didn’t flinch or open his eyes, “What?”

“Jesus, you’re not even asleep.”

“Yes I am.”

“Liar. Get up, you said you’d come with me to this thing.”

“The Masters mixer?”

Lily rolled her eyes, “It’s a mixer-“

“- a Masters mixer-“

“- for Masters students. There is no need to give it a name.”

“But ’Master’s mixer’ rolls right off the tongue.”

“Get up-“ Lily hit him with her bag this time, “You said you’d come-“

“Ow-“ eyes open now, “Those things suck, everyone always thinks we’re dating.”

“I’ll tell them you’re my brother.”

“That’ll never work, I’m way better looking than you.”

Lily turned away, “Right, you’re uninvited-“

“Hey!” Sirius’ arm shot out, grabbed her wrist.

“I’m Masters Mixing without you-“

“You said I could go!”

“Invitation rescinded.”

“Come on! I’ll wear a tie!”

Lily looked smug, “You are so predictable.”

“Please,” Sirius sat up, “You’d be so bored without me there.”

Lily, who would be, said: “I’ll say you’re my step-brother”

“You can still date your step-brother.”

“Not with a clear conscience, you can’t. Get up, I’ve rung a cab.”

//

Sirius Black to Lily Evans: sleep nutty professor

Lily Evans: just had major breakthrough with The Thesis i cant

Lily Evans: also tell the girl/guy/person ur with to not drink all the milk tmrw theres barely any  

//

Sirius, stationed outside the Lily’s room, banged on the door again. “C’mon Evans!”

James, distantly, from the phone hung by Sirius’s leg. “Maybe she’s not in”

Sirius put the phone back to his ear, “I know she’s in,” He continued to bang but returned to James, “Does this mean you guys are going to be meeting Bill Gates?”

“Dunno. I guess it’s his money so, like, maybe? Oh God-“

“If you met Bill Gates without me I’m going to be so fucking pissed-“

“How could we met him with you you’re in London-“

“EVANS! OPEN UP! WE HAVE MONEY NEWS!” Sirius returned to the phone, “You’ll probably get a picture with the ghost of Steve Jobs or something, God, I’m already annoyed about it.”

“If we met Steve Jobs’ ghost I promise to put him in a jar and send him home.”

“You had better-“ Sirius, who had paused in his banging to finish the Steve-Jobs-ghost threat, could hear something coming from the other side of the door. Music, played just low enough for someone who didn’t want people outside to be able to hear. “She’s playing the Sense and Sensibility Soundtrack.”

“What?” James’ whole tone changed, “Is she alright?”

Sirius banged again, “Evans!” Nothing. She turned the volume down.

“Are you sure its Sense and Sensibility?” James, insistent.

“Of-course it is.” Sirius banged on the door again, “Evans, What’s wrong?” No answer.

“Do you think there’s any chance it’s because I look a little bit like Hugh Grant and she hasn’t seen me in eight months?” He sounded a little desperate.

Sirius snorted. “You do not look like Hugh Grant.”

“Sirius-“

“Honest to God, do you actually think you look like Hugh Grant?”

“Would you-“

“Total opposites, honestly, never looked less like a person-”

“Sirius,” James cut him off, “Something might be really wrong, you have to let me talk to her.”

“Oi, Lil!” Sirius called, “Do you think James looks like Hugh Grant?”

A voice, thick, from behind the door: “Fuck no.”

Sirius knocked again, politely, letting the phone drop to his side (James, distantly: “I said a little, put Lil on, Christ-“). Lily opened the door, face red, puffy eyes, hand gripping the door edge.

Sirius stared, James forgotten. “What happened.”

“Petunia is engaged.” Lily’s voice, raw and wrong, “To Vernon. Eliza Hunt told me at the supermarket.”

Sudden flashes of Petunia, the only time he’d ever met her, sat in the back of Lily’s twenty-first, pinched and whispering. “Whose Eliza Hunt?” This seems as good a thing to say as any.

“Our old neighbour. She got an invite to their engagement party last week.” She sniffed, rubbed a hand over her face. Sirius couldn’t think of anything to say, except that he wanted to throw Petunia into a very deep ocean.

“What’s the news?” Lily asked. She looked so tired. He cannot remember the last time she’d slept.

“Bill Gates’ foundation is giving us a ton of money and James is going to post me Steve Jobs’ ghost.”

Faintly, Lily smiled. “Is the money to buy the ghost?”

“Nah he’s going to steal that, moneys for the business.” She smiled again, stronger. Jackpot. Sirius handed the phone to her, James’ voice barely audible. She reached for it, and he gripped it tightly, only for a minute. “Hey.” She looked at him, red eyes, hand out-stretched. He can read her backwards.

“I’m good.” she said. He kept looking.

“No murders?”

“Yeah,” half-smile, “No murders.”

//

Remus Lupin to Lily Evans: tell him to check his fucking emails im going fucking feral

Lily Evans: will do

Lily Evans: he says so be it  

//

“Keira Knightley’s in it.”

“Is it Pirates of the Caribbean?”

“No-“

“Why isn’t it? Let’s watch Pirates of the Caribbean” Sirius, lying across the couch, kept throwing remote in the air.

“Just because you think you look like Orlando Bloom-“

“I do look like him-“

“Only if you shut your eyes and drop acid-“

“Hey-“

“We are not watching Pirates of the Caribbean again. You’ll like Atonement, I promise, it’s like an epic war love story-“

“So like Pirates of the Caribbean but without-“

“- He’s not your twin-“

“My twin-“

Lily rolled her eyes, considered pushing his legs off her lap, didn’t: “You can’t only watch films because you look a little like one of the actors.”

“So you do think I look like him!”

“No I said think you look like-“

“You said ‘look a little like’! Ha!”

Lily pushed his legs off her lap. “If you look like Orlando Bloom then I look like Molly Ringwald.”

“Nah, you know who you look like,” Sirius tilted his head, “The kid from Finding Nemo with the braces. The one who holds the fish in a bag.”

“Oh my God-“

“Only a little-“

“You suck. You fully suck.” Lily was laughing.

“Let’s watch Finding Nemo! See your twin for a change-“

“You’re pushing it now.”

“Fine, maybe twin is a little strong. Cousin.”

“Second cousin. And you and Orlando could be, like, half-brothers if I have two beers and squint.”

“I’ll take it.”

//

Sirius Black to Lily Evans: what the fuck

Sirius Black: evans its three

Lily Evans: sorry i dropped a tray promise ill b quieter

Lily Evans: dont worry im not making brownies again

Sirius Black: thank god those were shit

Lily Evans: fuck you

Sirius Black: you were the one that put them in the bin

Lily Evans: go to bed judas

//

“We’re trying to stay positive.”

“I’m not trying that hard.” Sirius confessed, and Lily punched him on the arm before going back to the phone.

“We’re just waiting for the locksmith. If we still had a spare this wouldn’t be happening, but-“

“If you took your keys!-“

Lily punched him again, and Sirius groaned and fell back against the grass.

Over the phone, Marlene finally composed herself. “You two are tragic. Come ‘round and sleep here.”

“Can’t, we said we’d wait around. You could come here though.”

“And lie on the lawn in the middle of the night with you and Mr Positive? I’ll pass.”

“Hey, Sirius,” Lily held the phone away from her ear, “I think that’s an ant’s nest.”

Sirius leapt up so quickly he almost hovered in the air. He stared at the empty ground, wide eyed, before turning back to Lily, who was laughing so hard she’d dropped the phone.

“Oh, very funny, you’re hilarious. McKinnon,” he picked up the phone, “You’ve got to get over here, I’m going to kill Evans and I need you to call the cab to move the body.”

//

Sirius Black to Lily Evans: ive bought eggs and cheese

Lily Evans: ur cooking tonight so looking forward to the meal of cheesy eggs

Lily Evans: sirius im kidding please dont make that

Lily Evans: sirius

//

Lily took the phone and didn’t even say hello, “You’ve got to stop ringing,” she said, meaning none of it, “Narelle really thinks you’re on the verge of investing. It’s not on.”

“Hey, I always say I’m ‘thinking about’ investing,” James pointed out, “I could be thinking about anything. I’m thinking about finishing my engineering degree, I’m thinking about ringing my mother, I’m thinking about investing in your diner-”

“it’s not my diner-“

“it will be when I invest in it. One of my stipulations.”

“Wouldn’t that be buying the diner?”

“Don’t get all technical on me, Evans.”

“Apologises. You were saying you were going to give me the diner.”

“Yes, what a great boyfriend I am.”

“You’d be even better if you just gave me the money.” Lily spun the phone cord around her finger, grinning as James laughed.

“C’mon, I’d let you rename it and everything. ‘Lily’s’ has a ring to it.”

“Unoriginal.”

“What would you call it?”

“I dunno. ‘Star Wars’ or something. Get some publicity off the lawsuit.”

“Moony would defend you.”

“Ah yes, with his degree in financial law.”

“I didn’t say he’d be any good at it.”

Lily smiled. “How’s California?”

“Boring without you guys.”

“Don’t let Remus hear you say that.”

“Eh, he’d say the same.” James paused, “Sirius alright?”

Flashes of Sirius, flushed, spread on the carpet, What if everyone was right? Head lolling, party over, I don’t know where I’m going. I thought I’d know.

“Yeah. Last night he tried to make you guys a Wikipedia page.”

James snorted, “He’s been trying to do that since high school.”

“Don’t say ‘he’ like you weren’t also trying.”

James, again, grinning. She can tell from an ocean away. “You sleeping?”

“With other people? No.”

“Thank god for that, but really. My sources say you’re even more awake than usual.”

“Sirius doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“My sources are actually highly knowledgeable.”

“But still can’t make a Wikipedia page.” He doesn’t say anything, and Sirius is such a traitor. He has him worried. “I’m fine, really. Just a bit of a weird one. I’m going to sort it out.” She meant it.

“Okay. Don’t be pissed off at my sources, Marlene also ratted you out.”

“Terrible mates.” Lily lied.

“Yeah, worse luck, having people give a shit about you. Just wait till you own the diner, then they’ll only want you for your money.”

“Tell me about it, why do you think I’m with you?” And again, miles away, he laughed.

//

Lily Evans to crab on the cob: sirius just started doing karaoke

Remus Lupin: I didn’t know byo’s did karaoke

Lily Evans: neither did the owner

Lily Evans: the whole byo is now singing take on me

Lily Evans: we’re doing mamma mia next

//

Lily tapped on the window and Sirius, smoking outside, swung around. She pointed to other side of the bar, past the people, where Marlene and Nathan were grossly making out against the pinball machine. Sirius made a face, stamped out his cigarette, and went inside.

“Christ, you can see the tongue from here.” He took the beer out of Lily’s hand and drank some, “No respect for the festivities.”

“At least someone is getting some.”

“Aw, Lil,” he nudged her arm, “I’ll hook up with you if you want.”

“I’d rather eat glass, but thanks though.”

“Anytime.”

She took her beer back from him. Mary, a few feet in front of them, was drinking a ghastly pink thing that James used to call flamingo piss, and talking to Diner Natalie (as Sirius called her) about Love Island. Narelle, who had gotten wind of the party, was standing by the counter arguing with the bartender about the peanuts on offer.

“Twenty-three Evans,” Sirius said, echoing her, “You’re proper old now.”

“Still younger than you though.”

“Funny how that works.” He took her beer again. She couldn’t remember when they had started drinking the same brand. It had been such a long year, but next month the boys would be home for three weeks and this morning James had sent flowers and Remus a vase, and Sirius said he’d pay the water bill so technically it was a three-way gift. You could practically hear Remus’ eyeroll through the phone. They were too good to be believed.

“’Glad I live with you.” Sirius said, suddenly, holding her now finished beer. “You’re- I’m just glad. I’m glad it’s you.”

Lily looked at him, “Me too.” She said, and squeezed his wrist. He knocked a hand against her thigh. This was the real gift.

“Offer to hook up still stands.”

Lily laughed, “You know, if you think about it you’re one hook up removed from Nathan.”

“What?”

“You fucked Mar, Mar is now getting felt up by Nathan. That’s, like, one degree of separation. I’m not getting with anyone whose gotten with Nathan-“

“Okay, wow, I have not gotten with- wow, this is low, I’m being nice and you’re out here saying I’ve fucked Nathan-“

“Hey, no judgement and no murders and all that, but I have ground rules-“

Sirius, laughing, “I hate you. That’s my ground rule.”

Lily, singing: “And happy birthday to meee-“

“God, get away from me. I can’t believe I’ve accidentally hooked up with Nathan.”

“Maybe getting me another beer would make you feel better.”

“Wow, you’re always looking out for me huh?”

“You know it. Make sure it’s chilled, would you?”  

//

[stargazer-balladeer]

I have decided to do a self-insert- 😃😃 Lily is now part of the Genshin world-

If ya’ll are interested in her backstory, pls continue- but if u aren’t, its okay- :pp i just want to share it-

(I also decided to edit the Yatagarasu a bit :pp bc i only know abt it thru ace attorney: miles investigations- ya know, Kay? So imma center it abt that-)

So I was planning to make Lily a Yatagarasu, i’ve heard that he was a great thief in Japan (idk if this is tru- cause when i look it up- it showed a three-legged crow-) or in this case Inazuma- and I also want her to have some connections with Cecilia (ya’ll remember her right-?). So this is what I have in mind-

Lily was born in Inazuma, in a rich, powerful family. Her parents were actually ppl that do experiments on children, one of this was Aura (or, as we all know, Cecilia). Lily was never aware of this fact however, since she views her parents as idols. She has two older brothers, of whom she loved dearly.

Her parents weren’t home much so she usually spends time inside her room or with her brothers and servants. Her life was practically perfect until-

Lily was curious on what her parents do so she followed them one day. You can imagine her horror when she found out- her parents soon discovered that their youngest child followed them. Knowing that she would tell everyone, they promptly banished her from Inazuma.

[I also have smth in mind abt banishment. Since her parents are powerful, they must know spells, right? What if they make an enchantment on her that makes her unable to return to Inazuma? Like tatoos. They’ll burn in her skin if she ever gets too close to Inazuma. Just a thought- 👀]

Lily, now frightened and alone, was scared. She didn’t know where to go. So she wandered in the wilderness, gaining injuries and bruises along the way. She only ate what she could. It isn’t until she stumbled upon a village (im not sure abt this part actually but lets wing it-)

The villagers (mINEcRAfT-) took pity on Lily and an elder took her in. There she slowly healed. And its also there where she learned how to fight. Since this villagers were known for their stealth (or ninja) background, they decided to teach it to Lily.

Lily slowly mastered their techniques and such. She learned how to use a polearm (yes, i like polearms- fite me-) and slowly became a master. Through trials and errors of course. She left Inazuma when she was around 5-6, and she arrived at this village when she was around 7 (so she wandered for 1-2 years-). She stayed in the village until she was around 12 or 13 years old.

Her life was completely normal, until a fire broke out and wiped everyone in the village. Everyone but Lily. Devastated, she fled once more. But she now carries the knowledge of the techniques that the village has taught her.

She wandered around once more before arriving to Liyue Harbor (i actually dont know where Inazuma is located but lets just roll with it-). There, she saw how ppl behave. And saw how ppl is having a hard time with money, poverty in short.

Ever since she was young, she was told of the great thief Yatagarasu, who would often steal something and return it. No one knew about their true intent. Then they revealed that their only goal was seeking the “Truth”. After saying that, they took down the malicious ruler (at that era) and made Inazuma a paradise once more. (I’m not sure abt this- hshsh-)

Ever since then, tales about the Yatagarasu has been passed down from generations to generations. Lily always wanted to be like them, to be someone that is fighting for justice and freedom. So, she decided to become the second generation of the Yatagarasu.

Instead of doing what the tale said, she decided to be like Robin Hood and steal from the rich and give it to the poor. Ofc, since she was young and albeit clumsy, she was caught multiple of times. But she was always let out, free of charges. This is bc of Ningguang, who gain a deep respect towards Lily for her actions (i believe she would respect those who wants to help the poor since i read that she suffered from poverty as well-).

News started spreading abt the Yatagarasu, who steals in the night and vanishes in the morning. It spread like wildfire abt the sudden appearance of the Yatagarasu. Lily continued her actions, believing what she’s doing is good. As much time goes on, she soon became a master of stealing things from ppl.

But soon, the ppl in Liyue Harbor protested. They wanted the Yatagarasu to disappear. As much as Ningguang wants her to stay (she pities Lily-), she had no choice but to send her away. Even tho the ppl want to know the identity of the Yatagarasu, Ningguang kept it a secret and manages to calm the ppl in Liyue Harbor.

Now on the run once more, Lily continued to flee (she continued to ran for days-) until she reaches a mansion near the river. Starving, she took some grapes but was caught by a man. This man was none other than the mansion’s owner, Diluc. Diluc noticed her immediately and ask her where she came from.

“Inazuma. But I was banished.” She simply answered. Diluc noticed how thin and frail she look, having not eaten anything ever since she run away from Liyue Harbor (imagine that long trek- yikes-). Diluc decided to take pity on this girl and offered her a place to stay in the mansion, only for a while. In which Lily immediately accepts.

Diluc gave her food and some new clothes. (Her current design is albeit similar to his actually- just wanna point it out bc i want to draw her after this- 🤧) Lily’s pale skin began to glow and the light in her eyes came back. Diluc soon discovers her ninja-like skills when she was trying to reach for the cookies in the cupboards above-

He decided to let her stay in the Dawn Winery, making her his assistant or smth. So now, Diluc has a girl who’s following around, even in Angel’s Share. Many rumors started spreading abt the sudden appearance of Lily and the sudden disappearance of money for the rich ones-

Afterall, the tale of the Yatagarasu continues on- even if she’s not seeking the truth. (Diluc knows abt her Yatagarasu identity btw- 🤧🤧 he basically becomes her older brother-)

She doesn’t have a vision btw, i’m planning on giving her a vision thru the story- 👀 i’m still debating whether or not she’s an Anemo or a Pyro-

[shhh-no-ones-home]

behind the barrier din djarin x reader

+++++++++

Im back! or at least for right now i am. this is the only story i have for a while because i started writing a new book during my break and have been focusing on that more than anything. i promise i will be back with something else before the month is over, i just dont know how soon that will be right now lol. until then though i hope you all like this one because i have thought of nothing but the Mandalorian since the season two finale absolutely wrecked my body and soul :)

themes of nightmares, war flashbacks, and surgical ptsd. its nothing too heavy, i dont think, but as always read at your own risk

Song: disguise by motionless in white

tag list: @cynic-spirit

+++++++++

I sat at the end of the bed, head in my hands and shaking it lightly to a beat that wasn't there. Din had been asleep for a good while now, curled up behind me. God I wanted this to be over, I wanted the nightmares to be over. I stood up, rubbing my hands over my face as I started pacing the otherwise empty room. It had a bed and a small table and a sink placed outside the privy. It was cozy, or at least it should've been. When I heard the bed creak I drew my blaster, pointing it to din as he sat up slowly.

"Y/n? What time is it?"

He asked groggily, his voice gruff coming through the modulator. I sighed, holstering the gun.

"Almost day light."

I said reluctantly, moving to the small window and pulling the wood slat back. We probably had about two hours till the suns came up.

"Have you slept?"

He asked, sounding more awake now as he started the walk around the bed to get to me. I shook my head no as I leaned against the window sill.

"We have a long day ahead of us, you might want to try."

He said and I scoffed, a laugh barely audible emerging from my chapped lips.

"I'll be alright."

I said, Finally looking to him. He was still in full armor, helmet too. He was still on the fence about removing it, despite having taken it off for the kid he spoke so fondly about. I grew up hearing about Mandalorians and it was never anything like what he told me, even in the few months id known him. And I still hadn't seen his face, or the foundling. He puzzled me sometimes.

"You're lying to me aren't you?"

He asked and I sighed.

"Just go back to sleep. I'll figure something out."

I said, being startled by him leaning into the window beside me, causing me to scoot over in the small space.

"I hear you screaming sometimes."

He said and I tensed up.

"And?"

I asked, seeing him turn to me out of the corner of my eye.

"You haven't told me everything have you?"

He asked and I shook my head.

"I'm not what you see on the outside that's for sure."

I said through a dark laugh.

"Do you trust me?"

He asked and I shrugged.

"Do you trust me?"

I asked back, a long silence following.

"Touche."

He finally said, standing and walking away. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply before standing and turning to him, now on the other side of the bed where he had started.

"Din-"

I said quickly and he stopped, his back still to me.

"Don't take it personally, I don't trust a lot of people. But I'm glad you took me in when I had nowhere else to go. It's just-"

I paused for a second, trying to collect my words and he turned to look at me over his shoulder.

"You don't know what it's like out there, to be stripped of your identity and put back together piece by piece."

He slowly turned his whole body to look at me.

"I close my eyes and I see them. I'm so tired of running but I know I cant really face myself either."

I said softly, looking to the ground.

"Maybe we're more alike than I thought."

He said nonchalantly before turning back around and opening the cabin door. I sighed as he disappeared down the hall, pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration.

"If you only knew."

°°°°°°°°°

"What happened?!"

He yelled as we ran through town, shots being fired.

"How should I know?"

I quipped back, ducking behind a metal beam, grabbing him and pulling him into me. We both panted, looking to each other as the red flashed around us.

"I can't keep this up."

I said through a harsh breath and he tilted his head.

"We don't have another choice right now."

He said, looking over my shoulder before grabbing my hand and pulling me along.

"Din I can't!"

I yelled over the crashing behind us, feeling my legs and eyelids getting heavier. I was exhausted. I hadn't slept in over 38 hours and we had been working all day. My body just couldn't keep up anymore.

"Keep going."

He said through what sounded like gritted teeth as he drug me around.

"Din."

I said softly, feeling my feet go out from under me, his hand slipping from mine as I hit the ground hard.

"Y/n!"

He yelled as my eyes closed. The last thing I felt was a gust of wind before everything went blank.

°°°°°°°°

More running. Except this time it was from a tall, dark, hooded figure. I couldn't quite make him out but he was chasing me. He was gaining on me, his hand outstretched as the sounds of gears grinding filled my brain. No. No. I wasn't being put under again. I couldn't take the pain anymore. No. Don't take me back. No. I can't do this again. Let go of me. Get off. Why won't you all listen? I don't want to go to war for you again. No. I just want to be normal again. Stop it. Let me go. No. No!

"LET GO!"

I yelled, jolting upright in bed, feeling my body drenched in sweat. It was then that I realized I had pushed din backwards away from me. He was stumbling back at the foot of the bed and we were somehow back at the inn. Everything was painted in the low glow of orange light and this was the first time I'd seen him without his helmet. But I knew it was him, he still had his other armor on. Then I realized. He looked scared. Was that because of me? I let out a staggered breath, one I didn't know I was holding, as I swung my legs over the side of the bed. I closed my eyes for a second before snapping them back open and placing my head in my hands.

"I'm sorry."

He said, peaking my interest. His voice was harsh, like he'd been screaming too. I wonder if his throat burned like mine did.

"For what?"

I asked, barely above a whisper, now noticing I wasn't in the same clothes I had been in before. I sat upright, looking to my exposed arms, the metal and wires of my upper arm and shoulder shining under the tank top straps. I was mad but only for a second.

"I'm not sure."

He said a little lost and I laughed.

"I guess we know each other's secrets now."

I said looking from my arm to him. He sent me a small knowing smile, matching my own.

"Does it hurt?"

He asked, noting the irritated skin where the metal was attached both at my chest and my forearm. After they configured my new shoulder and upper arm they had reattached it to the metal. I inspected it as he moved to sit beside me.

"Sometimes."

I said softly and I could see pity flash across his face.

"Is that what you dream about?"

He asked, me looking around for my jacket. I nodded as I found it and slipped it on.

"Sometimes."

I said again.

"Is that what you where dreaming about this time?"

I sighed, sending him a look.

"yeah. They were hunting me, holding me down and bolting me back together."

He nodded once, clearing his throat.

"I see why you wanted them to let go."

He said and I laughed.

"It's not all bad I guess, I'm more ashamed than anything and I only dream about it when it hurts. Or I guess it hurts when I dream about it, I've never really figured out which it is."

"How did it happen?"

He asked, turning to face me and running his hand over my arm, tracing his finger tips lightly over the leather of my jacket and pushing the wires flat.

"I got shot by a battle droid, point blank. It completely blew out half my shoulder, chest, and arm. I was a soldier at the time, drafted, not willingly; and because I was one of the poorer soldiers they decided I was a perfect test subject for their new med team. I couldn't afford proper help and my forearm was barely holding on by a few tendons so they experimented on me. Sometimes I can still feel the pain of their needles digging into my skin and tacking my muscles to the metal."

I said, looking down at my hand, opening and closing it a few times.

"It took months to figure out how to use my hand again, after more poking and prodding, reattaching the nerves to more wires."

I shook my head, squeezing my eyes shut. There was a flash of white light and I could see the doctor clear as day, coming at me with a scalpel. I opened my eyes back up when I felt him hug me.

"I won't let them do that to you again."

He said softly and I froze, not sure what to do.

"Din-"

"I promise I'll keep you safe."

He whispered and my face fell. There was a long moment of silence like he needed this as much as I did but I finally hugged him back.

"Thank you for being a friend din."

I said and he nodded against me.

"I'll keep you safe."

He repeated and I could feel tears burning my eyes. No one had ever done anything like what he'd done for me in the few short months we'd been traveling together. Maybe this was it, this was what family felt like. I squeezed him tighter to me, digging my face into his neck and he let out a shaky breath.

"I'll always keep you safe."

[ayymanwtf]

im in an aesthetic writing mood which, im quite aware is nothing like my usual content but im a limitless being and you should probably accept that. please?

anyway here are the aesthetics that some of my fave mgk songs have:

FLOOR 13 — drunkenness, trembling hands covered in blood, the source of it unknown, stumbling through an abandoned psych ward of a hospital, feeling the floor beneath you move in waves, rocking from wall to wall of the narrow corridor, seeing a figure resembling the one person on your mind at the end of the hallway, white knuckles gripping the steering wheel, pushing as hard as you can on the pedal of a car, eyes glassed over, the curve of the road not being the only unstable thing, dizziness, experiencing jealousy for the first time, getting in trouble on the playground and trying to excuse your actions, vodka swirling in a crystal tumbler, you’ve lost count of how many you’ve had, sipping it and thinking its water, mysterious white powders sprinkled on glass tables, looking out the balcony of a hotel, the curtains fluttering in the evening breeze, the first moment of serenity in a while, begging for them to come back, regret

LOCO — return, amusement, superiority, seeing a person you used to know and immediately judging them on how they turned out, cracking your neck too hard and feeling it ache, liking the feeling knowing it was the first time you’d felt something in a while, the concept of exoticism, ruining someone else for your own entertainment, not caring despite knowing, the kind of sex that is derived from pure anger and resent, anger and resent for someone else, but still leaving the new person heartbroken, new beginnings and sealed endings, rekindling with your old friends, only to end it all to see the looks on their faces, a blunt laced with gold, pushing someone off you too hard and hearing them wince, internalised desperation, numbness, living life with anger and thinking its the only option

Death In My Pocket — the clouds during a sunset, experiencing grief for something you never had, reminiscence, mourning the life you could have had, a silver flute crushed under your boot, cleaning up the wounds on your knuckles yourself and remembering a time when someone else would have done this for you, stepping outside for the first time in months and feeling the sharp wind on your cheeks and still not feeling anything, running away from nothing at dawn, begging and bargaining, leaving the house on your own for the first time and witnessing things you never wished you had, diving into an icy cold lake, exhaling reflexively once your face reaches the water, feeling your lungs burn for oxygen underwater, and still not coming up until you feel them fill with liquid, wetting the shoulder of a stranger with your tears, asking why, asking why, asking why, again and again, feeling pain and wondering when the next time will be that you forget this feeling

RAP DEVIL — piano and bass chords combined, welcomed confusion, betrayal, feeling someone sit on your lap and wanting to throw them off you, repetition, de ja vu, anarchy, rebellion, standing up against bitchy old people, leaving your respect behind to do whats right, being drunk at a party and hearing all the songs around you meld and blend until everything sounds the same, someone telling you to smile more, accidentally saying the wrong thing and hurting someone’s feelings, eventually accepting and standing by your words once you find out who they truly are, refusing to ask for forgiveness, eating the rich and remembering to season them, childhood shows with creepy ulterior meanings, burying an enemy, misconceptions, idolising your father until you realise his neglect, snapping someone’s neck and feeling no guilt 

LATELY — clocks ominously ticking, reminding you of the time youre wasting, taking LSD for the first time, seeing the world swirl and mix around you, looking in the mirror after taking acid and seeing the most genuine version of you, ghosting and then sending I miss you texts to the same person, experiencing nostalgia with anger instead of contentedness, falling asleep in a cold hotel room and seeing your worst fears come to life before your eyes, empty rooms and bare faces, singular drops of blood dripping from your palms once a day, looking directly into the sun and thinking about how the moon harnesses that much light, dancing on the dance floor and mid-song feeling your social battery die and wanting to go home, asking someone to help and them leaving you on read, doing shrooms and feeling like you’re sat inside of a rapidly spinning washing machine, knowing that nothing will ever be the same and still denying that fact

el Diablo — a casino in the middle of the deserts of Nevada, Mexico at the peak of its drug war, playing poker with blank cards, upheaving the gambling table, a woman squatting in a leather mini skirt with her legs spread wide open, her cigarette dropping ashes onto the road in front of her, glowing embers on an ash tray that carried the ashes from the cigars belonging to the most powerful men of the americas, pushing a traitor against a wall and keeping them there with the grip you have on their neck, remembering where you came from and making it a big portion of your success, doing deals with the devil, the devil pitying you, abandoned hotels turned into brothels, biting the hand that feeds you, nonchalance portrayed in the most douchebag way possible, playing saxophone in high school and growing up to be the person everyone wanted to be, mob bosses hotboxing in a room full of strippers, being the authoritarian figure you always hated, being the person that people go to for permission, rising from rock bottom to the very top of the mountain, knowing all and saying none, driving in the desert and leaving dust trails to make sure everyone knows that you were here, kissing with split lips and not bothering to clean up, not just thinking youre the superior, but actually being the superior, gaining everyone’s respect AND fear, never begging but always waiting, an intelligence unmatched  

if you guys want more let me know?? idk if anyone will actually like this but I know that I had a lot of fun doing it and ill gladly do requests as well!! anyway sending my love, have a great day!! feedback is also appreciated also: @ripbrat k im tagging u but ur allowed to ignore this 10000% dont feel pressured I just thought huh mgk. OH WAIT K LIKES MGK. anyway uhhh have fun please!! 

[slut-for-fandoms]

Paint me yours (kth x reader) PART 1

Pairings: Artist!Taehyung x reader

Genre: smut, fluff, angst (in the following chapters) 

Summary:  You are an art college student who struggles with finances. Until one day, on an exhibition of the arising artist Kim Taehyung, when the same boy offers you a job as his model. Would it be just a simple job or would it complicate your life in ways you have never thought it would?

Warnings: none in this one (perhaps my bad writing and lots of mistakes?) 

A/N: So here is the first chapter. I really don’t know what to think about it as i haven’t written anything in more than a year (so sorry guys but now I am back, yey) I really do hope you like it and please let me know what you think and whether you would like to be tagged in the series ♥ Enjoy 

Euphoria. Excitement. Happiness. Exaltation. A complete symphony of colors and emotions. Blue, purple, violet, azure - blended in such a way that glues you to the masterpiece. At places it seems unfinished, raw, as though the creator has been in a hurry. But at the same time it is so detailed that you wonder how long it took him to create it. It represents a woman, or to be more precise, a young girl. Long hair composed with ochre, amber, honey and a hint of gold, covers half of her pale face. Her lips are the perfect combination of red, cheery, wine and auburn. An orderly chaos of colors.

While everything seems just as raw painting, the most capturing features are the eyes. They are so detailed and express the condition of the girl. The sparks that make her look tangible grabs you on a roller coaster of thoughts and feelings and somehow makes you even experience the same state.  I move to the next painting.

Sadness. Affliction. Pain. Torment. The contrast between the used shades is much deeper. Pale yet dark. The more I look at it, the more it captivates me. All of the creations I saw were beyond amazing, complete masterpieces but this one… This one is different. One look and I got this strange feeling in my guts when we anticipate something bad, something that might hurt us.

The background is composed of dark shades, while the girl is sculpted of the pale range of colors. Again, the most detailed parts are the eyes. You get the feeling as if a soul was trapped inside the drawn girl that shows how much she suffers. The more you contemplate, the more you assume that the darkness around her represents the cruel world, while the bright yet shaded colors shows how fragile and broken she is. Is it from the world? What destroyed her? Who made her look like a shattered vase which parts are no longer going to form its beautiful shape?

Holding my glass of champagne I took some steps back and sat on the settee opposite the painting. Thanks god it wasn’t that low as they use to be in other galleries. I crossed my legs which caused the hem of my black dress to roll up slightly. As an art student, I tend to visit many exhibitions in order to get inspiration, gain knowledge of the new and unorthodox styles and improve mine. I can’t say I am complaining as we are given free access to any kind of such events. This is beyond amazing as now I am contemplating the art of one of the rising artists – Kim Taehyung. Honestly, I have never seen him but the critics consider him the new Van Gogh and now I understand why.

When I came I was so uneven about it, all the people here were rich and classy and I, a broken student with a cheap dress borrowed from her friend, had no place here. Everything was out of my league and I felt like garbage disfiguring this place.

“You seem really immersed into the picture.”, someone chucked, bringing me out of my thoughts. I looked up and saw man in golden suit and two glasses of champagne in his hands. His smile was so bright, genuine, that it made me blush slightly, “May I?”, he titled his head towards the settee as if asking if it was free.

“Ye- yeah, of course”, I stuttered and put a lock of fallen hair behind my ear.

His smile grew bigger and he took the free seat next to me.

“Here.”, he gave me one of the glasses. I looked up at him confused, “I saw that you have already finished yours so…”, I looked at my glass which was empty. I might have stayed there for a way longer time that I have thought. I left the glass on the floor next to the settee.

“Thank you.”, I gave him a smile, although inside I was feeling embarrassed, “Very fond of you.”, I said after taking the offered glass.

“Well, I just wouldn’t have forgiven myself if I have left such a beautiful lady sitting here by her side. The champagne was just an excuse to approach you.”, I bit my lip and tried to hide myself due to the blush that crept on my face.

“You are even more appealing when blushing.”, okay, I have never believed I could become so red but here I am.

“Please, stop.”, I stuttered through the smile that just grew bigger on my face.

“Why?”, he tilted his head and asked me with that sweet smirk still placed on his face, his eyes never leaving my figure, “you don’t like honest people?”, as a response I chuckled and tried to gain my dignity and look at him. Why was I such a blushing mess around this… stranger…a handsome stranger?

“It is just that you are the first one to approach me this evening.”, a slight feeling of sadness made my stomach turn as I recall the events, pardon, the lack of them from this night. I started playing with my hands as something as pity overwhelmed me.

“Well-”, his deep baritone voice made me look at him. This time he was facing the painting in front of us which gave me the opportunity to survey him. Soft pink lips, sweet roundy nose, medium long light eyelashes. Skin in the color of bronze and a golden suit that make him look like a god. Aristocratic hands with long fingers, adorned with rings. The way he is holding the glass gives you the thoughts that a prince is sitting oppose you, “It is their lose.”, he states after locking his eyes with mine. And then I’m completely lost. They are just like the sad girls’ in the paintings – full of emotions. I see the same spark that leads directly to his soul. It captivates you. There is love, care, tenderness that make my heart skips a beat. But also you can spot something wild and intriguing. An abyss of feelings kept locked deep inside.

He took a sip of his champagne which caught my attention and made me break the eye contact. How could such a simple action as drinking makes me wanna grab the brushes and paint this gorgeous creature on the canvas?

“I can’t say I am complaining of that.”, I followed his movements and took a taste of my drink, “They seem like they are here only for talking. All of them are just chit-chatting and just at times spare a glance at the paintings. It – It just looks like a gathering of the rich and bitchy class.”, suddenly he burst into laughing. Oh that sound… It was like a soft melody for my years I could listen to all day. It was so infectious and addicting.

“What?”, I asked confused but with a smile plastered on my face.

“I couldn’t have said it more correctly. I’ve met everybody in the gallery and yet you are the only one contemplating the works.”

“Isn’t that what we are supposed to do on an exhibition? But apart from that, these paintings, these masterpieces…”, I took a breath like looking at the sad girl opposite me, “they are captivating. There is life in them, there is soul. Undoubtedly the artist is one of the best I’ve ever come across. Many have the ability to draw, few have the talent to create a masterpiece, something that makes you stop and think. And these here, they indeed convey more than a hundred words.”

“And where do you think that comes from?”, he asks me in that deep voice of his. I turn my attention back on him to see the man already looking at me with a stern expression showing nothing.

“The ability to make a painting live?”, he nodded his head in agreement, “Pain.”

“Pain?”

“Pain. It is always the pain. Why do you think the greatest artists are those who have suffered the most?  Sadness, sorrow, ache, agony… they are different than the other feelings. When something good happens to you, you are happy for a short moment. Usually those moments tends to be forgotten way easier than the moments that our soul was in pain. It is just that the affliction we bottle inside us ruins us in the end. The knots in our stomach, the suffocating feeling in our chest… they are tormenting us and we all need a way to express them somehow, to try to get them out of us. And the answer is always the art. It doesn’t matter whether it would be with a brush or a pen in our hands, if we are going to compose a poem, song or just draw something.  We just want the pain away. For its tight fist around our hearts to weaken, for its dark thoughts to leave us at peace at night, for the tears to stop rolling down and choke us.”, I paused in order to take a sip of my champagne, feeling his eyes following my movements, “That is one of the reasons why I like this one so much.”, I continued pointing at the work before us, “It look as if not only the model had been sad, but also the artist.”, when I turned around he had a sad smile on his face. For a moment I saw the abyss – full of sorrow and regret, pain and affliction.

“You can’t be more right.”, and once again, as he looked up, the door to his soul closed with that stern expression, “That is why I don’t know whether I like this work or not.”

“It recalls a bad event?”

“It recalls the day I painted her.”

My eyes were so wide that surely they were going to pop out of my head. I opened my mouth, then close it, then opened it again. I was so shocked that I could say nothing.

“I still remember how heartbroken she was.”

“You- you are the artist?”, my voice raised an octave higher and I cursed myself.

“Surprised?”, he asked smiling at my shocked expression.

“You just caught me off guard.”

And then the rest of the night kind of slips my mind. I don’t really know how long we’d been talking through various topics. Whatever felt like hours had only been half an hour once I saw the watch on my hand.

“Unfortunately, as a host, I need to make a speech. It was nice to meet you -”

“(Y/N)!”, answering I took his hand as he helped me get up from the settee.

“(Y/N).”, he said tasting my name and I could not miss the way his tongue rolled and the deep voice that sent shivers down my spine, “A beautiful name for a way more gorgeous girl.”

“Why are you trying to make my blush so hard?”, I asked trying to hide my face.

“I don’t know. I just like it.”, he shrugged with a smile, “Can I ask you something, (Y/N)?”, is it just me or he just lowered his voice on purpose while saying my name.

“O-Of course.”, out of nervousness I started playing with my own hands which only made his smirk grow bigger.

“Would you like to be my model, darling?”

[fourthwingingit]

Two

Edit: tumblr didnt post my edits from my original post (like you know when you save something as a draft and go oh wait there are some errors like no header and awkward phrasing lemme fix them) so im gonna repost this eventually but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Edit 2: tumblr sucks and never lets me put the thing so... This is for the anon who requested a fic of touch starved clark and conner with the prompts 'nobodys ever done that to me before' and 'i just want to be held' sorry it got angstier then i ment it to.... hope you like hurt comfort

Clark hovered awkwardly outside the door to conners room. He was nervous about seeing the teen with everything between them and what he wanted to ask him.

He took a breath. Conner almost certainly knew he was there already. But that didnt matter.

Ma always said that manners matter

He knocked.

From inside came a muffled, annoyed, and clipped

"What is it clark?"

Taking that as the best invitation he was going to get he opened the door and went in.

He looked at conner. The kid was on his bed, facedown on top of the covers like an angsty teen in a movie.

Clark thought he looked too small for the position he was in. Like he was waiting for some blow that was going to take a part of him with it to land... or like it already had and he was cradling a hole

Clark shook off the disturbing thought and steeled himself. He swiftly walked to Conner's bedside, and said, eloquently,

"Well. I... you see...... uh... lois- i mean to say..... uhh"

Lord this was already going to hell in a handbasket.

Conner turned his head enough to raise one eyebrow

"What the hell was that?"

He sat down a respectful distance away (as far away as he could) and tried again

"Hmm... you see i uhh- hmm you know how uhh.... things umm. Sometimes.... uhh"

Conner slowly turned his head the rest of the way to clark, confusion now written in every line in his body. great.

Clarks back bowed fast. Like his head gained 20 pounds in a half a second, his arms planted themselves on his knees and he gave up trying... he'd try again some other day. Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe lois should do it.... Kal-el you coward.

"I... i dont know, ive got nothing."

But now he was scrambling, he needed a reason for being here. And what came out was;

"Ma told me shes uhh, seen you acting in a... less than..... ideal...... kind of.... way.?"

"Wow."

"No yeah i heard it"

"That was some next level awkward," and there was some distinct venom in that voice shoot. "if its that hard to be around me then you can find the door. I certainly dont need your pity handouts anyway."

Well.... shit

"No thats not.... im.... i wanted to ask- uh... whats been bothering you..... sport."

He now had what bruces kids called The Awkward White Man Smile... great.

Suprisingly, Conner chuckled.

Maybe a small part of Clark's brain said its not hopeless?

"Right now? Your social skills."

Banter! He hung around batman! He could do banter.

"Aww man and here i was thinking i was handing out winning lines."

"Oh no, youve gone senile a little early, well... maybe not early... good thing you've got Kara."

There was a small smirk playing at conners lips and an actual opportunity. God was real and he loved Clark Kent.

"At least I know I have two good boys to pick me up after im down." He looked away fast.

Silence stretched on

.......

Awkwardly

Oh lord he messed up the moment

He presumed too much and their only friendly interaction in over a month is ruined

"Two?"

The voice Conner used was so painfully soft and small. Like it didnt dare to hope anymore and had stopped trying a long time ago.

Clark never was good at leaving voices like that alone. And he was always more comfortable when something needed doing anyways.

Superman courage steadied him enough to take a risk.

He reached out his hand, and ruffled Conner's hair, trailing his fingers down after to rest on the shoulder closest to him and said.

"I have two kids dont i?"

More silence

Conner was frozen beneath his fingertips

He panicked

Oh god

He had fucked it up

He had fucked up enough times that conner didn't want anything to do with him

Okay damage control

"That is...." Conner stiffened further "if i haven't been so horrible to my eldist that he doesnt want anything to do with me"

The silence was now so deep he could hear the dust motes brushing against everything

He heard a tiny sniffle

And then he telltale sound of tears hitting bedsheets.

His head whipped around, his glasses flew off somewhere into the room. He barely noticed.

Shocked, he started to speak but Conner cut him off before he could finish the first syllable.

"You know when i was in Hawaii i used to watch families. Specifically parents and children. I'd be so jealous of-"

Conner cut himself off.

"Nobody's ever- i mean...... parents do that to their kids.... the hair touching thing.... Nobody's ever-" his voice broke, he cleared it. "Nobody's ever even tried to touch my hair if we werent kissing."

He gave a pitiful, watery laugh and, after a breif, stunned, pause, started rambling about how "of course i get it cut, like, the barber touches it and stuff..."

And it all hit clark.

Somehow it had never occured to Clark, that even though Conner looked like he was so much older than Jon, he wasnt.

He wondered who raised him

Who fed him

Who hugged him through nightmares

Clarks heart broke

Because he was certain the answer to most of those kinds of questions was 'Conner' and none of them were "Kal-el" or "Clark Kent"

Clark turned a bit and ran his hand over Conner's back softly, cutting off his rambling and said in a voice that was somehoe warm but still felt guilty and mourning;

"What do you want? What can I do?"

Conner was stunned. Kal had never given him anything like this. So he kept talking to give his brain time to catch up.

"I don.... i- i used to watch families... in- in Hawaii, and I'd get jealous of the kids, that they got to have families. Got to have parents. I dont..."

Clark turned a little to properly face his son and grabbed his hand.

"What can i do Conner?"

One day ago Conner would have asked for a lot. To never see Kal again, the superman title, his spot in the JL, even some time with Jon. But now?

Conner shifted, he sat up as best he could. And guided Kals hand to the side of his face, through tear tracks, held it there for a second, and then slid it into his hair. All thr while leaning into it like it was the only support he needed.

"I just want to be held.... without expectations..... without titles or rules or anything in return."

Connor wouldnt meet his eyes, or look up from the bedspread during his request.

For the second time that day Clark's heart broke. But now he had something he could do.

He reached out with his other hand, guiding his son into his arms, and gently layed them down

He kept one hand on the back of Conner's head, stroking the strands there. And one hand on Conner's back slowly moving back and forth.

From the first point of contact, Conner's world narrowed to the hand Kal had put on him. And now, there was more. Now he was allowed to reach out. He wanted to get closer. To bury his face in Kals chest and curl up small. To let the world fall away around them. Until nothing existed but them. Holding each other forever.

Kal seemed to read his mind, and guided his head to tuck itself under his chin and pressed them closer together.

No promises, no strings, no obligations after.

He could leave whenever he wanted.

He wanted to stay forever.

Conner wondered breifly what was like to be held by a father. If it felt as nice as this. Like everything crashed in on him, but it was okay.

Maybe, he thought.

They had a maybe.

And this maybe was a lot of ground to stand on.

[jadecringecomp]

it took me the longest time to realize this, but jade had only befriended me for self validation abt their abuser, broden. i have screenshots and further information under the cut.

i initially befriended jade after they informed me broden was worse than he had made himself out to be. and so i proceed to block him off everything i had him on. soon after, me and jade became close. however, jade was... incredibly weird abt it regarding broden and would constantly point out how they ‘stole’ me from him. i can only show screenshots to show what i mean.

“[jade] LOL i was going thru brodens whining tag again

[image from broden’s blog reading “You, Jade, are worse than evil. Worse than a cyberbully, even. Rae is blocking me because of you and your so-called ‘act of justice’ against me. Well you know what? You’re the monster made by your own heinous ambition, slowly abusing me to death with threats and insults towards me.”]

[jade] now we’re best friends lol die mad freak

[jade] ‘worse than evil’ takes ur friends anyway”

“broden you know that even if me and rae werent friends they’d still hate you lmao”

“’lose/lose’ idk man im the one who gained a bunch of awesome friends who support me....and you have none....”

“[screenshot of a post from broden reading “There is also no reason to include anyone else in this situation besides you, your boyfriend and me. Nobody else, not even Rae, should’ve gotten involved with this situation.”]

broden you can’t get mad at ME after i gave you like dozens of chances to stop being a piece of shit before outing you to the people you were lying to. and you literally cannot get mad that rae (and everyone) fucking hates you now because you literally make no effort in any of your friendships! anytime anything happens you just completely give up and throw yourself a pity party like ‘well i guess this is goodbye’ or something and put absolutely 0 effort into fixing any of your relationships so the only person you have to blame for the fact you have no friends is yourself. also me and rae are best friends now are u mad? sorry i helped one of your victims broden. die mad about it.”

“broden im sorry im so much fucking better than you, have an amazing boyfriend who loves me and super awesome friends who are funny and i have fun with and dont abuse and that im actually likable as a person“

“if im just stirring up old drama and youre just some innocent uwuwu then why do i have so many friends and support from them and you’re all alone bc youre repulsive...”

“broden are you mad i exposed you to your friend and now we both validate each other as victims of you and i’m a better friend than you could ever dream to be“

“[screenshot from brodens blog reading “anonymous said: so like...why do you hate abuse survivors tho” broden responding “You may be an abuse survivor but it doesn’t give you the right to be abusive. I don’t hate you, I’m disappointed that you are not able to be something else than the thing that you hate. You gazed into the abyss, and the abyss gazed into you... I’m sorry.”]

[jade] this is so fucking edgy like shut the fuck up and stop shitting on abuse survivors you fucking idiot. why dont you explain to @gravecores and @pyjuumun how we’re idiots for standing up to our abuser and how that somehow makes US abusive. fuck off.”

even putting posts i made abt the broden situation into their broden tag which broden does go through (#b)... and sure i did give them permission to rb these but the fact they threw some of this into a tag they have dedicated to broden and they know he sifts through says a lot.

“[me] broden, to me: jade said it wrong i actually only rped rape and pedophilia many years ago

broden, right now on his blog: rping rape and pedophilia

[jade] broden: says fucking anything

me: *fucking sorting through all the proof of himself digging his own fuckin ass grave* mhmmmm go on go on”

“broden… the themes you do in your threads are extremely explicit and to me its genuinely hilarious how you try and excuse your fetishes with “but its fictional!!!!!!” and. its not the fact you rp those themes that makes her call you an abuser. theres so much more to that. the fact you want to sit there and type out how someone is involved in incest and how exactly someone is raped just shows to me that it isnt just some story plot or whatever. if you have the balls to sit there and type that out, it shows me you have rape and incest as some sort of fetish.

trust me broden if it were just mentions here and there i wouldnt think much of it. but in your story ive seen the incest and pedophilia being normalized and ive seen you type out in detail how someone is raped. im begging you to please realize that can only show you have all of these as a fetish or kink or whatever. again, if they were just mentions here and there i would think nothing of it.

broden im literally on my knees and BEGGING for you to realize that your actions are speaking so much louder than your words. ik you like to think jade is on your ass for “fictional rp themes” but! she has a valid reason to be + all the other things youve done to her! im sorry broden you are just. not in the right in this case.”

“[me] idk what kinda fuckshit is making ppl believe “oh yeah the victim is now being the abuser” but im almost sure its because ppl have no idea how abuse works.

[jades tags] #hm i would die for you? #b”

theres probably more to it, but i think you could get the gist of it. jade befriended me for nothing more than self validation and using me to take jabs at our abuser and it really fucking shows. after all during our friendship all they would talk abt was him. we barely had any normal conversations. if it wasnt abt broden, it was abt smth else that was bothering them. so go figure.

so before jade wants to throw out there that i was a fake friend for making a single mistake they never even allowed me to apologize for, maybe they should think this over abt how they used me to get back at their abuser.

[tmntxreader-fics]

TMNT Raph x Reader: Battlefield Temptations

WARNING WARNING THIS IS MY YOUNG TEENAGE SELF A FEW YEARS BACK ATTEMPTING TO WRITE RAPH IN HEAT AND ITS LOWKEY HORRIBLE I APOLOGISE BUT AT THE SAME TIME I THINK ITS FUNNY AND I NEED SOMETHING TO POST SO IM GONNA POST IT ANYWAY

I DECIDED TO BRING THIS OVER FROM MY OLD ABANDONED DEVIANTART ACCOUNT- SO DONT PANIC IM NOT PLAGIARISING (don't know whod try to plagiarise this piece of shit anyway)  I tried to fix it a bit but I failed miserably.

WARNING: cursing, violence, slight steaminess- not enough to be nsfw but its steamy

(Reader is fem)

“Are you willing to spar today, child?”

Master Splinter's voice slices through your concentration on the battle before you. You jump slightly at the suggestion and shake your head vigorously, your hair coming loose and waving around the frame of your face. Raising a finger and pointing it into the direction of the brutal sparring between Raph and Leo, you give Splinter a pointed look with a nervous laugh.

“Aha, no. No, I don't think so. Besides, I'd probably be murdered in there,” you turn to glance at the turtle brothers whose fists have turned into blurs that pummel each other into the ground with a force that would surely shatter every bone in your body were you to take one blow. Especially one of Raphael's hits. He'd kill you instantly.

Donatello and Michelangelo remain seated a meter away from you on the side of the sparring mat. Both would wince every so often when one of the fighters landed a particularly brutal hit, that fighter would more often than not be Raph: A 6'5 mass of boiling rage and rippling muscle. A terrifyingly intimidating character to meet at first but you learned  to warm up to him as he had to you. Maybe you’ve warmed up to him a little too much.

Compared to 5'11 strategical and precise Leo, Raph seems like a giant. But Leo is no push over, he can very well hold his own against the brute, he's the only brother that has a chance at beating Raph and the red masked turtle hates that fact. The sweat drips down Raph's bulging biceps, dropping off with every shattering blow that he lands on his brother. His gritted teeth serve as an indicator to his concentration and hints at frustration. Red masked eyes narrowed down into piercing green slits, meant to penetrate the enemy's soul and destroy them from the inside as well as the outside. Your eyes roam over Raph's muscled form and your mind dive-bombs into the gutter. A blush takes residence upon your cheeks at the less than appropriate thoughts that suddenly occupy your mind. His large and rough hands caressing you with a gentleness that you had thought to be impossible; strong fingers drifting across your skin with only a light touch, enough to bring you to your knees.

“Enough!” Master Splinter takes his cue to end the match before things get overly heated between the fighters (and your thoughts). Both brothers shake hands tersely with each other and move to sit down, awaiting the announcement of who would be sparring together next.

“It will only be a grappling match. Wrestling, if you will. No hits,” Splinter persists, the look in his eye urging you to accept. You shake your head again, you don't care how much the rat gives you the 'do it' look you are not going put yourself in a situation that would get your head bashed in.

“What, Kitten? Too scared to play with the big boys?” Raph mocks from where he is sitting. You fight the urge to snap something back at him that would surely make him swallow his tongue and just settle for a glare. “You gonna break a nail, little princess?”

“No, I just don't want to fight,” you reply calmly. What crawled up his ass and died? Raph isn't one to be sexist, he isn't one to pick on you either. What’s he up to? “That's because you can't. You should probably sign up for cooking classes or something more suited to you and your...” his eyes fleetingly skim over your body, “-stature.”

Your eyes widen in absolute anger! You vaguely hear Splinter reprimanding his son for the blatant display of disrespect but you find yourself still burning with indignation. That condescending, sexist, chauvinistic, boneheaded piece of sh- “I'll do it.”

It takes you a moment to realize that those words were spoken by you. You just said them. You just agreed to get bashed. Oh, God where is my head? What have you done? You stupid girl. You mentally chide yourself for your impulsive decision.

Please give me Mikey! You chant mentally, Mikey is easily distracted and you’re sure that you'd be able to take him down if you really set your mind to it. It was maybe even a possibility you could hold your own against Donatello considering he is without his weapon.

Who am I kidding? Your thoughts nosedive, as does your confidence. Versing these guys is a completely different ballgame altogether.

You turn to give Master Splinter a look of 'please take pity on my poor, poor soul' but he's not looking at you. He's deciding which turtle to put you up against. “This will be grappling only, no hits exchanged,” Splinter commands, then his gaze flickers to you for a moment. You give him the puppy dog eyes and in return you receive an unamused stare. “Raphael. Stand.”

You almost topple over as you choke on your own spit, “wha- what?!”

Raphael raises an eyebrow but a slight smirk settles in the corner of his mouth as you slowly walk closer towards him. His gaze does not waver from your eyes until you are standing a meter away from him, in which his eyes smoothly move down to your lips and then the curve of your neck. Raph's eyes snap upwards to your face before going any lower and you notice how his gaze darkens slightly. You gulp, noting how he stares at the movement of your throat distractedly. God, what have you gotten yourself into? You know he is watching everything you do, surely observing your possible weaknesses. Both of you stand in your desired fighting stances as Splinter opens his mouth to start the fight.

“You got this, Angelcakes!” Mikey, ever optimistic, yells out with a wide grin and waving hands. Donnie gives you a sympathetic smile and Leo, as per usual, remains stoic.

“Begin!” Splinter snaps you back into the moment and you yelp as Raph wastes no time before lunging at you. You duck beneath the offending limb and circle a safe distance away from him.

“Keep your head in the game,” Raph says, his voice holding a tone of slyness to it. “Don't want to finish you off before the real fun's started.”

You falter for a split second, was that an innuendo?

He reaches for you again and you barely evade his advancing manoeuvres, weaving between his grasping hands and leaping over the leg that he sweeps under you. His eyes narrow slightly and his attacks become more and more difficult to fend off.

“The point is to take him down!” Mikey says before turning to Donnie, “that's is the point, right?”

You immediately drown him out and disregard him as a distraction. Focus on not getting grabbed!

You bend back, just barely avoiding a swipe for grip on your neck. You try to throw back your own offence only to recoil your hand sharply when Raph immediately makes a grab for it. Okay, so the straight on approach isn't going to solve anything. Maybe if you flank him from behind you'd have a chance of taking him to the ground!

You roll to the side sharply, evading a grab and dive through Raph's spread apart feet. Raph grunts in surprise and before you can tell yourself to stop you leap onto the back of his shell and jab at a pressure point in his shoulder that would drop any normal person instantly. You’re overwhelmed by a rush of elation when you feel Raph's knees hit the ground. Could you have actually won?

No.

His hand grabs your forearm, pulling you forward to lean over his shoulder. Your stomach is pressed into the edge of his shell, the breath in your lungs is forcefully expelled by the impact. Raph's face leans into yours, cheek on cheek as he roughly whispers, “gotcha.”

You're sent flying forward, sent into an uncomfortable front flip and landing hard on your back. You're winded, unable to do anything but stare in shock at the figure that has now pinned you down from above. How did he do that? You dropped him!

His weight on top of you causes you to snap back into reality, his skin upon yours is rough but not as unkind to the touch as you’d have thought it to be. You try to wriggle away but he immediately presses himself down on you, rendering you motionless. Raph’s smirking face moves closer until he is but inches apart from yours. Your heart is racing and butterflies embark on a mad rampage in your stomach. His body on top of yours. Skin on skin. So close. Too close.

You turn your head to the side and he leans in  to the crook of your neck, next to your ear. “Submit.”

You growl and shake your body as much as you can, flailing your legs angrily but gaining no movement or ground. He chuckles briefly.

“Make it easy on yourself and just submit,” he murmurs to you. Your face is red with anger and exhaustion as you continue to writhe beneath him, you’d be damned before you give up without a fight. Your movement earns a slight growl from the turtle on top of you. You freeze.

“Stop moving if you know what's good for you,” he hisses in your ear. Your chest heaves up and down against his own as you breathe heavily. After a moment of silence, he repeats the sentence with irritation lacing his words. “Submit to me.”

You refrain from crying out loud in frustration and sudden breathlessness as you steadily say the words, “I submit.”

You feel Raph grin against your shoulder before he stands to his feet, towering over your 5'5 frame. You feel as if his weight had left a physical dent in your body, stars appearing in your vision briefly as you greedily gulp the air he had robbed from your lungs.

The smug creature offers a hand to you and you pretend you don't see it, standing to your feet yourself. He had humiliated you. Not because he had beaten you. That would have been fair and square and you would have taken it in good sport if that had been it. But that wasn't it. He had motives behind his movements, the way he whispered in your ear... when he growled lowly as you writhed beneath him. The way he had embarrassed you and infuriated you with his mocking words beforehand.

As you are engrossed in your thoughts, everyone collects themselves and moves to leave the dojo- Splinter having wisely dismissed the session. You ignore Raph, trying not to make eye contact with him as you head towards the exit. You and the brute are the last ones in the training room which is probably exactly what he wants. His large hand grabs your forearm pulling you aside before you can make it out the door and you glare up at him heatedly beneath your hair.

His height and build looming over you intimidates you but it also has another effect that you're not sure you’d ever admit out loud. Raph's eyes make contact with yours, staring intensely for a moment before looking you over. “Did I, uh, did I hurt you at all?” He asks gruffly.

You stare at him for a long moment, torn between answering with a 'f*ck yeah you did, dickhead' and 'nope. Now piss off.'

You settle with a simple and bitter “no.”

He raises an eyebrow, amused. “Sore loser.”

You grit your teeth and poke a finger into his plastron angrily, “Sore loser?! You would've won either way and I would've been fine with it! But what I am 'sore' about is that fact that you didn't just beat me.”

He takes a step forward, a smirk playing on his lips. He seems so different. Controlled. He knows what he wants and he's surprisingly confident in his movements. You move backwards subconsciously before realizing that you have quite literally just reversed into a wall. You look up with wide eyes as he moves in closer than what your personal space limits people to.

“Why don't ya just explain then.”

“You- you humiliated me! Toyed with me, mocked me, made fun of me and then you-you....” You trail off, unable to describe his intimacy towards you without throwing yourself out to look like a fool.

“Why do you stay on the defence in a fight? You wear yourself out,” he pipes up, leaning back a little giving you room to breathe. You blink, a little shocked at the subject change.

“You're a 6'5 walking mass of muscle. I'm a stick insect in comparison. Please explain to me why I would ever hope to believe I had a chance to take you out by a full frontal attack,” you say bluntly, crossing your arms over your chest unknowingly boosting your cleavage into his view. He glances down at the flesh bursting from your bra below him and licks his lips, moving in towards you like he had before You see the resolve in his gaze flicker, he is struggling to maintain the façade. You inhale sharply, trying to continue.

“I'd be...better off...running,” you gasp as he moves his lips to rest on your neck. Your heart is in your throat, thrumming beneath the soft but firm touch of his mouth. Raph seemingly breathes in your scent before running his cool tongue over your sensitive skin, tracing the veins in your neck.

Your eyes widen at the contact, a choked gasp slipping from your mouth. There has always been chemistry between the two of you, the occasional flirting and the light banter you were both notorious for. But never had he been so blatant about his attraction towards you, never had he even gathered the courage to kiss you let alone touch you so sensually.

Then you realise, eyes widening at the sudden revelation. He’s in heat.

Your hands come up to rest on his chest but not entirely pushing him away. There’s a light pressure on your throat as he suckles at your sweet spot, delighting in the sound of your erratic breathing and whimpers.

Raphael’s right hand remains next to your head on the wall, essentially keeping you caged within his grasp.  His left hand roams over the smoothness of your waist, groaning almost silently as his hands continue caress your midriff.

“Well, then.” He whispers huskily, finally responding to your words. “I promise you don't need to run away from me.”

That was it. His mouth melds onto yours and you’re not sure who initiated the connection as his hands run up and down your body. The force of the not-so-gentle kiss pushes you into the wall leaving you vulnerable to his desires. His lips moving feverishly on yours as he captures your flesh between his teeth, asking for entrance. You moan, parting your mouth in obedience, his tongue immediately seeks out yours to battle for dominance.

The hardness of his muscled body against yours was overwhelming, the raw strength, danger and masculinity was making you swoon. ”Oh God, Raph,” you sigh in delight as his lips move from your mouth to your neck to greet that special spot once more.

He lightly nips your throat before turning to make eye contact briefly, eyes shimmering mischievously, “I think it's time for round two. Wanna rematch?”

[the-firebird69]

they hassle him non stop itches and pinches sickness and more and tons of berading talking smelling threats and attempts to harm him.  tonight will be different you losers will feel pain now and lots of it when you try picking up the phone like the addicts you and we wont go through it again. you wont get any inventions and you wont get our engineering we pull it all.  drain you  all to death in doing it.  meaning forg want it and will are pursuing you for it now. are at your door banging loudly, and will kill you for it..we are in forg garb too.  get it.  we shoot you for them they get in fights we do it now. on purpose....ok he had yoru women say it to you they knew hate you as they should.  are tough adn mean but hey you are much much meaner and stupider. lousy people  lame friends if that is what you call it and you suck so badly for calling us ok the idiot with the restaraunt  name we crucify you along with a few trillion others.  no...octillion....and we set it up you go there you are up on the cross immediatly..talking...we hear it all confessions and more...are at it need it ok.  and they call and we see who.  now you notice after piles and piles of you die a night...we pile you up too your so dambed stupid...fn fags.    Thor Freya you know what your problem is s...what they say..thats yoru problem you have to ask.  now it is evident you are lame here and the motif is too ruggid...grinds you down, you use a matrix all do and slices you up.  your cheap mean senile pukes as planned and die smiling about it. lose your intel and hardware, and troops and cloning, your personal lives too.  you did all this sold the beans and cow..and so on...and dont notice...have to ask. are told forget.  so what...we do taht. exactly. your free to die.  and that is how. pitiful deaths.  so shut up go away and crawl off pitiful wretches here you inane and die. i mean really how embarrassing do youu think it is...they see you converse no, spit blab harrass croak in all the wierdest ways and see your weak...forg take you..so you want to ramble now ok get it rolling do so we take you to the holes local ones so we can get him up and Thor says it was said nicely... Zues Hera it is what it is and that..your horses asses on purpose and have no idea the danger or results or immpmlications none.  we know. and you are a loser there...tons dont get it you blab to make sure.  how aweful for you and them.   to die like this at his hands.  and ours..withe ease by the way...he makes it look so easy tons of forgieners do it and find your willing to die.  nice touch. too adding you in the mix no. your a total  fool.  and your idiots pipe up knowing full well they croak hoping to injure him..so he is then injured. we do nothing for you still.  and you fall again immediatly.  and ask in ridiculous ways. a re p ushovers we push you over.  and yeh we can talk and talk and aare not you doesnt affect us like you...the sound attracts killers to you and machines monsters and they destroy you.  but your too busy having fun making faces in a camera like a three year old child....mostly girls. your so eradtic mean  hostile immediatly.  you lack the understanding here in fl. most of you.   Thor Freya right on the money. it is true most cant see it and blab and torture each other and into violence or poisonings and most are losers here are under the influence of methane and other. it is hell they are so bleak and lame and senile and stark.  this fn blows this state.  and the people fall fast too hours here and off ranting...he seems immune.truly does is not a ranter yes. but has a bit no.  and he is serious he is arguing with real ppl. you idiots put your point out over and over and over and over to nobody to find you hunched over your computer in the am dead or asleep or exhausted and nurse yourselves to life for a day..and do it again.  lame.  useless.  mean.  hostile. and yeh it is not rpoducing squat. mac is angry there it is and you all balk he said it and there is his grandaddy ashortly need it..and balk.  he will kill us prob your useless...they say no we work..so get off him..now. leave him bee he only sits. no. we need it now....so we hit now mac says true too these are all greedy shits and the lot and bja and others shitheads too so dumb. mean arrogant lame.  so tell me off you shit we hit you your a loser.  and your father says it you fn scum your ruined it the one who was supposed to help you ccould not produce one chopper and had it...i saw his eyes oh that is cool...then plop.  no movement for  weeks no sales no investors.  no fun nor entertainment only brooding.  so he says you stoppe him and he says  yup.  and he will yammer all night and die.  so what you are a fool. you stopped you and no you cant couldnt and he knows it blocks.  the german tape co.  price point but blocked a s they could have sold cheaper and didnt.  machines you see do it in germany and i knew and then this..w.e cant let you mac said.  horrible mac says and the bugs are atrocious attack and attack and attack. just like our whooses.  attack and attack and tons of it shpping nd working and it is so lame and bad forg trashed the north adn midwest and south adn weset.  east gone shortly..your out you fags. out. i demand it qe and pick me up mac and macs i will be in the ocean tonight or shortly within days...jons house he presets says he doenst know he does.  told us tons and you dont get it.  ratted you out on tons of stuff and nuances due to your inflammatory attitude.  and she is horrendous inlfuences him to f up his own stuff.  easily.  he is a failure. this is nonsene keeping them around, this is it im fed up he is so stupid he rants about him..and youi are influencing him to you shit.  and not forg.  he says so we use forg stuff. not for long we are there kicking you out they are too you braggot dead bitch. you are in the middle as caa pointed out and die fast. and have tech and data and intel we need back badly. we intercept you craft you idiot using his channel..your a liar.  qe happy weith yourself you got me in trouble,,,adn for years. cork your a frggin moron tell  me to get you in trouble to blame me  your technique and tons know.  trump and others rat on you you wont shut up stop or do anything that is rational.  and you started in on me to harm me with your you go in the garden...and you go in the museum and your von hagen every single day you still announce it  billium send in reports says how many times. then you try stuff, are huge pigs and are monitored.  your not allowed to harm me as you are.  you try you die you overstuffed imbicile...he means you are puffed up and mean so we hit you....and you are not to contact him ever nor lot or any of you. r estrtaining orders are on you all your within 100 feet in or out of the house you are down and out.  all of you die tonight by the way we dont allow you back to earth your a dunce ok.  Thor states and Freya issues orders...we need bigger teams yes...she says and sends.  i request we flatten three major areas of cork, take them seup bases and Thor says ten...we divvy now and prep to bomb shorlty we shall...and it goes now....we also hit the entire upper mid west and in corks name too....we present most of the crosses are him...take them down he orders no affect lets make haste...we shall...and ther eis none...toss them all into holes seek out all cloning...and birthing and we did all the quetioning and they thought they would be freed we hit in fl and elsewhere using it and he is happy.  yes bja rememered your idiotic questino. happy you will die as he has tried to kill  you for many years..has been successul tons of times.. of course happy idiot. Zues Hera   we launch a full blown program now against cork and use it all.  this is nonsense he does and on purpose to distract us we use it on him. Freya  we use it too his inane comments and messing with him with bugs...tons say it off  turn off the compouter nah Thor macs mimic try to use it and try too hard. as do others...it is easy ok to see why. Zues we use it ok mimic those copying the orders using them on you and your assholes cork your a friggin asshole...we shoot you at each meetup ok your a faggot and wont shut up. Hera we see your guts as we enter and exit.  we hate you cork you fup so often adn to no gain.  your a shit too.  we fire you now mac daddy how lame of an answwer bja how lame of an act you ddi not conceal a thing so why hsould i ever react differently i have to defend myself and do wihtout hesitation, as you revealed yourself so many times adn are so frigin lame at your job Zues oh bja yeh oh little shit Zues go to hell cork now. i command it all those in my service you are to follow this order Thor and Freya Hera and Olympus shall enter....grab them all you see them grab them....and they send it now.  out.  stuff them in holes let us raise our Armies not our tempers....it is fruitless work cork wants and does not much affect but he is a miscreant and terrorist raises them trains them and lets hit his training camps..now Zues Hera anyohter comment corks you want more.   Hera nah we get it we are out cork oh you get it snide asshole. you shall Hera you shall yes.  we invade Savage Oppress says you blabbed macs plan and yours.

[j-esbian]

night terrors and sweet dreams - chp. 1

it’s @adrinino-november​ and NaNoWriMo, so of course that means i’m going to do a ninoir longfic. buckle in kids (it’s been...... a While since i’ve done anything longer than a oneshot)

on ao3

Words: 1.7k

Adrien and Nino had a policy to tell each other everything. It started after Nino chewed Adrien’s dad out one too many times without telling him first, but it stuck because they agreed it was just good policy to be open with your friends. Secrets aren’t a good foundation for any kind of relationship.

Of course, Adrien hated it, but he did have to keep one secret from his best friend. And he was really regretting it now, because it had landed him in one hell of an awkward conversation.

He and Nino were video chatting, under the guise of helping each other with homework. It was one of those rare Sunday evenings when Adrien had nothing scheduled, though his father was busy downstairs, running around like a madman and breaking the souls of his interns in the rush to plan their spring line. Adrien was quite happy to stay in his room and do nothing for a while.

They actually were working on homework for a few minutes. When Nathalie came in to check on him, Adrien hurried to look busy, but then they stuck to it even after she left, and lapsed into silence, with the rapid tapping of Nino’s pencil on his desk keeping time.

“Hey, dude?” Nino asked after a minute. His voice sounded strained, and Adrien figured he was having trouble with the math problem they were on. He definitely was.

“Yeah?” Adrien asked, not taking his eyes from his paper. Nino didn’t speak for a moment, so Adrien looked up. Though his face was trained towards his phone’s camera, Nino’s eyes were clearly fixed on a spot on the wall above it.  “What’s up?”

Nino wetted his lips nervously. “I, uh, don’t want to be that guy, but is it okay if I ask you about… gay stuff?”

Adrien chuckled. “Yeah, man, I don’t mind.”

“Right. Cool. Thanks.” Nino took a deep breath. “It’s just--I kind of wanted some… advice? Because I-I think I might like guys, too.”

“Really?” Adrien exclaimed. “I mean, dude, that’s great. What did you want help with?”

“I don’t really know, I guess?” Nino scratched the back of his neck. “I’ve kind of been thinking about it for a while, and I just wanted to… talk about it?”

“Sure!”

“I mean,” Nino continued, more confidently. “I feel like I’ve always kind of thought dudes were hot, without realizing that’s what it was, you know? And lately I’ve been just sitting with the thought of, like, dating guys or even just, like, letting myself be into them?”

Adrien nodded, and took a drink of water to try to suppress a smile as Nino gained momentum.

“I mean, for a while, I guess I just thought I was jealous of those dudes?” Nino shrugged. “Like, Kim’s just popular. Chat Noir’s just a superhero. You know what I mean?”

Adrien was glad he’d finished swallowing already, or he would have done a spit-take. “Yea--Wait, what about Chat Noir?”

Nino scoffed. “Yeah, come on, bro. Everyone knows you’re in love with Ladybug. Don’t tell me you’re not a little in love with Chat Noir, too.”

“I’m… not?”

Nino blinked. “Oh. Well, that makes one of us, I guess.”

“I--you, uh…what?” Adrien tried to seem casual, but he couldn’t help gaping.

“Dude, I’ve had some pretty good dreams starring Chat Noir,” Nino grinned.

Adrien rubbed at his eyes, still trying to process. “Wait, what does that mean?”

Nino flushed. “You know, the kind you might need a cold shower to wake up from.” Adrien squinted in confusion, and Nino sighed. “We banged, Adrien. I was trying to be discreet.”

Adrien made a choking sound and had to pretend to drop his pencil to have an excuse to duck down and hide his bright red face. He let his face take its journey through whatever emotions flashed through it while it was hidden from view, which mainly involved various degrees of shock and him silently mouthing, “What the fuck?” a few times.

He took a deep breath, and straightened up. Nino was looking anxiously at him from the other side of his phone screen, and Adrien forced up a smile. “Sorry, dude, I know this is a bad time, but Nathalie needs to see me for something, so I gotta go. Thanks for telling me, really, and I’m totally free to text if you need it.”

Nino’s face cleared, and he beamed. “Thanks, bro. See you tomorrow.”

“See you,” Adrien agreed faintly.

The moment Nino’s face disappeared from his phone screen, Adrien whirled around to face Plagg, who was stifling snickers on the bed. When he met Adrien’s eyes, he let himself be as loud as he wanted, cackling gleefully at Adrien’s conflicted expression.

Adrien’s phone buzzed; it was a text from Nino.

From: Quentin Tarantinino

Hey, sorry if I made things weird at the end there

Like I totally wouldn’t have mentioned the dream thing but like

Idk that was a big help in figuring it out bc it was just one of those things where u wake up and ur like “huh. Cool.”

U know?

Adrien had to laugh. He did know. But…

Chat noir? Really?

Why what’s wrong with him

Dude he’s so lame

B

R

O

U didn’t just say that

I’m offended for him

I’m offended for me

I’m offended for everyone???

LisTen

Every time I see an interview w him

I want to die

It’s embarrassing

Ok he can be kind of a dork but

It’s Endearing my dude

My bro

I’ll convert u mark my words……….

One day you’ll accept that chat noir is hot

Adrien snorted. “I doubt it,” he said aloud.

Plagg looked up at him. “You know, he didn’t hear that.”

“Yeah, shut up. I’ll show him how lame I can really be. Plagg, transform me!”

As Chat knocked on Nino’s window, he had the belated realization that he hadn’t thought this through. At all.

But there was no turning back; Nino had already caught a glimpse of his silhouette framed against the streetlights. Chat wiggled his fingers and grinned awkwardly.

He was off to a great start.

Nino’s face flushed as he scrambled off his bed, searching madly for something on his floor. He found a sweatshirt and pulled it on, pulling his headphones off his ears in the process, and they dangled down from the neck of his shirt, bouncing against his chest when he rushed across the room again. He cracked the window and casually tried to sling his headphones to their normal position around his neck.

“Ch-chat Noir! What’s up?”

“Oh, you know.” He stuck his legs through the open window, and sat down on the sill. “Just… chilling?”

Nino bobbed his head. “Yeah, cool. Cool. Uh, so is there anything I can… help you with?”

Chat shrugged. “Not really. I was just out for a walk. Saw your light on. You know how it is.” He kicked a pile of papers and watched them scatter across the floor.

Nino grimaced, but said nothing.

“So, what’s up with you?” Chat continued. “Staying upbeat, and all that? Well, I mean, I guess you’ve gotta.” He grinned and tapped Nino’s headphones with his foot. Nino had backed up pretty far from the window, so it was a bit of a stretch, but he managed to keep his balance by bracing both arms against the top of the window pane.

He was sure it looked ridiculous, but that was the point.

“What?” Nino looked mystified.

“Up beat,” Chat repeated. “You know.” He tried to touch Nino’s headphones again, without stretching this time, but ended up just sticking his leg in the air and wiggling it in Nino’s general direction. “Beats. Your headphones.”

“Oh!” Nino chuckled, but it wasn’t fake or forced, to Chat’s surprise. He had purposely made the worst joke he could think of in the moment. And he was used to Nino’s fake laugh, from the number of times he’d taken pity on Adrien’s horrible sense of humor.

What was he doing?

“Yeah, no, I’m good, man. Uh, h-how are you?” Nino crossed his arms nervously, hugging them against his chest. “What’s going on? Besides, like, shaving the--saving the city all the time. Man, do you even have any free time?”

Chat shrugged. “Sometimes. I do need to eat and sleep and stuff.”

“Oh, cool, you eat!” Nino flushed. “I mean, of course you do. I mean, I was going to ask if you wanted something to eat. You know, while you’re here. Or another time, maybe, if you’re not hungry now?”

“Oh, strange, nameless boy, you read my mind,” Chat said.

“Uh, it’s Nino. We’ve met before. You don’t remember me? I’m friends with Alya, and--”

Chat closed his eyes and held up a finger. “I’m doing a thing.”

“Sorry.”

“See,” Chat continued. “I came by here for one reason tonight, and I haven’t been totally honest. I stopped by tonight, because when I looked in your window, I saw something I want, and I wanted to ask you…” He paused for dramatic effect, and then said. “Can I have some Doritos?”

Nino stumbled back and snatched up the open bag of chips from his desk. “Yeah, sure,” he said breathlessly. “Take the whole thing, if you want.”

Chat stuck his hand through the window and grabbed as many Doritos as he could hold, before stuffing them all in his mouth. “Thanks,” he mumbled. “See you around.”

He left Nino standing dumbfoundedly at the window, his arm still outstretched and holding the Doritos bag out to no one. Chat ran home as fast as he could, and dropped his transformation.

He kicked back on his bed, and Plagg settled down beside him. “I think that went about as badly as it could have,” Adrien said triumphantly.

He had left his phone behind, and it buzzed from its place on his night stand.

From: Quentin Tarantinino

DUDE

YOURE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS

Chat noir

Just came by

He stole my dorites

And my heart

I DONT KNOW HOW BUT DID YOU DO THIS

IM

SHOOK

Yeah I’m Definitely into him

Lol

Adrien pls

My dude

Answer ur fcking phone I’m dying

Plagg looked over Adrien’s shoulder at the messages that continued to roll past. “Yeah, sounds like you did a great job, kid.”

[spillingmylifetea4481]

Chapter 5: My breaking point.

As if I hadn't experienced already that revolving my life around my boyfriend led nowhere, douchebag and I were really fond of each other. But of course you don't really know someone until you live with them. The first time I came to his house in Carlton Ga before I moved in there was a girl in his bed. This rubbed me the wrong way but I did finally see they were just really close friends from highschool and that she wasn't a threat to me after some time. Red flag number one. His hobbies were smoking weed and playing video games and reading comic books, endless hours of netflix watching. Oh. And messaging a shit ton of girls. Red flag number two. We lived with his mother and sister in a beat up trailer and he would constantly ask her for money for food and weed etc. He would have his close friends over for smoking sessions for hours on end and I grew tired of it because I wanted time with him too. He didnt work ever in his life for anything up to that point. He never cleaned up after himself or his dog or showed respect for himself as well as those around him. I ended up getting a job up the road at a gas station/cafe and ended up smoking loads myself, supporting his endless habits and showering him in attention and gifts. But at this point in my life I was easily jealous. When I was with Bob he cheated on me before he even took my virginity as well as my first couple short time boyfriennds also cheating on me before him so I was on my toes about douchebag talking to so many girls. We ended up hanging at his friends house often where I experienced xanax and psychedelics for the first time without a care in the world. We would get into arguments all the time over me demanding that he treated me with more respect and stop flirting with other girls. It never got anywhere. I dont really remember all that happened but one night I took xanax and drank after a fight and he left to his friends house and my mind immediately went to him going off with some girl so evidently I had ended up sending pictures of myself to Bob in my underwear ( funny because when we were together somehow the ones I sent him back then ended up on a porn site and my best friend in South Florida saw it had had to report it as child porn) and douchebag woke me up holding my phone to my face saying" what the fuck is this?" My immediate reaction was to crush my phone with my bare hands and beg him to believe me that they were old pictures. I was embarassed and couldn't believe I did that with hardly any memory of it.. So I chose to lie as if that was justifiable. Not long after that he ended up cheating on me with a girl down the street and I didnt find out about it until right before I had my son. I believe this is what initiated the inevitable with this poor excuse of a man. Many months went by with this toxic relationship and I became more obsessed with digging into his phone to find evidence of him cheating on me that I never spot on found. Anything I did find he always had a lie or excuse or gaslighted me on it. Then boom. A year and a half in I find out im pregnant. I had a hard pregnancy and gained a shit ton of weight so I was miserable. I went from 132 pounds to 204 pounds in 8 and a half months. I had mostly quit smoking but occaisionally I didn't stop myself due to relationship stress and physical exhaustion. Finally douchebag proposed to me at 7 months pregnant surely enforced by his mother and grandfather and we planned to get married. 8 and a half months pregnant I went into labor. I was so scared and excited all just to be ruined by him saying to me " look before we get married I want us to have a clean slate. So im telling you that I did cheat on you with someone." I said I forgave him but really I didn't. That's all it took to verify I wasn't crazy and he was a liar and a cheat and that I would most definitely would never trust him again. It was rough after we had my son. I was only 19 about to turn 20 and knew nothing of taking care of myself let alone a whole fucking baby. But we went through the motions of arguing and moving to Athens together into our own apartment with a lot of help from our income taxes and his mother. After I spied on him through his phone I found out he started seeing girls online behind my back while I was at work at our house, and even had them meet up with him at his work. I heard so many stories of his infidelities since at the time we both worked at Waffle house. I lost count of how many girls there were. I was desperate to fix the relationship so I started dancing around the idea of threesomes and open relationships to try to please him since he didnt seem to believe in monogamy. He brought girls over having them stay for days on end. I would cry and get angry and jealous and didnt know how to handle myself or the situation especially with my at the time 1 and a half year old baby. There was one girl in particular who came to our house to meet us to see if we were compatible for a threesome and she ended up seeing him behind my back. She was beautiful and honestly it wasn't her fault as much as I wanted it to be at the time.. He was head over heels for this girl and I thought to myself how I wasnt good enough. How all my hard work into this relationship was never going to be enough and I must have been ugly or unlikable, I gained weight so maybe he just didnt find me attractive anymore. We tried having a threesome after I confronted them about it and I guess they did it out of pity but mind you I genuinely have no interest in having sex with girls. Of course one night when he was supposed to be hanging out with her I talked him into staying home and trying to work things out and the girl FUCKING DIES IN HER SLEEP BRO. I was a chump and supported this man I had spent up to 4 years with and had a fucking child with crying over a woman I had caught him cheating on me with multiple times. I went to the funeral with him which Im sure everyone felt was fucking weird. Even had a video of them fucking since I needed proof to show him I knew he was lying dead ass to my face. I was depressed, contemplated suicide, etc. We fought in front of my son and I yelled at him when I lost patience. Made him spend time to himself in his room a lot which wasn't fair or responsible of me at all and I think about it every day. Im sure some part of me was going through post partum depression and didn't accept it. My poor baby boy had to see so much. I was addicted to pills and would spend all day finding money for my fix and dealers just to keep myself high enough to deal with him. I ended up going to jail in 2015 for shoplifting because I was ballsy about stealing stuff for my house since I spent all my money on drugs. I almost caught a felony. (Don't worry im not a theif anymore I learned my lesson) He respected and cared for me less every day of that relationship. This went on for at least several more months before I finally snapped and had enough of the lying and cheating and had a physical altercation with him..I moved in with one of my friends. He had already moved another girl in right after I left. I didn't even have a chance to get my things. I tried to befriend his new girlfriend and warn her of what he put me through and she didn't listen to me at all. Two weeks go by, I stopped taking drugs so I was going through withdrawals and fucked in the head even more intensely at that point and he calls me up throwing accusations at me taking his girlfriends belongings so I nutted the fuck up. I drove over there to get my shit and told him off for having me wait that long because "HE needed space." I go to unlock the door and this piece of shit holds the lock closed. So what do I do? Rationally handle it and call an officer to supervise? Nope. I took a fire extinguisher and busted the fuckin door down. Broke his tv. He started fighting me after I pushed him back for not letting me get my shit. Tried to strangle me, slammed my body in the door smashing my extremities repeatedly trying to keep me out, I went straight for his hair since he was sensitive about balding when he was young, he scratched my arm, he started destroying my lesther jacket with a steaknife,and my photo canvases that were not cheap after I broke his Tv, I don't even remember what all was said, then he threatened to cut his wrists with it and I just laughed and said "Give me that you little shit if you were going to die that way you would have done it already". My dumb ass went to take the knife from him and he pulled it back and cut my finger open. The police were called and they took me to jail since I was too fucking honest and told them I had just moved out even though my name was still on the rental agreement. After I got out I tried to get back on my feet. My son ended up staying with his Grandfather and his wife in the midst of all this so he didnt see any of these altercations go down thank god. I stayed in bed for about a whole month and did nothing. I didn't eat, couldn't sleep, and smoked weed just to keep my nerves and withdrawals from opiates at bay. I did get revenge on the girl he was with by cutting 2 of her tires and cutting one of her brakes. It was risky but I got away with it. I lost a bunch of weight in a month and looked sick but I was thin for the first time in 2 years so I didnt care.. I slept around a good bit trying to fill the massive hole in my heart but nothing really fufilled what I was longing for. 5 years of some prime years in my life so disgraced and wasted on this fucking guy. Another fucking guy once again I've spent too much time and effort on. I've never been the same since then. To be continued...