#double trouble fic

[joyful-enchantress]

Spring Heat (18+) | Loki x Fem!Reader

banner created by the amazing @springdandelixn

A/N: You help your husband through his yearly heat, which is part of the Jotun mating cycle. He's afraid he might hurt you, but you are determined to stay... I wrote this for @springdandelixn and her Double-Trouble Sleepover! Congratulations, Beanie, my love! I hope you enjoy this little fic that I put together for you 🖤

Genre/Warnings: Jotun mating cycle AU, smut (18+), rough sex, choking, dubcon? (everything is consensual but Loki is not entirely in control of himself), language, light angst, fluff too, filth with feeling, established relationship

Word Count: 3182

The sights and sounds of springtime were all around you as you strolled through the palace grounds —

The busy twittering of birds as they searched for food and fought over tree branches on which to build their nests.

The chattering of squirrels and rabbits and other small animals as they came out of hiding to begin a new season of life.

The rich shade of green returning to the grass in the meadow, speckled with pops of color where wildflowers were beginning to bloom.

Speaking of blooming flowers -- the palace gardens were thriving, and in the next couple of weeks were sure to become a spectacle of color, ranging from delicate pastel hues to bright, vibrant tones. Just in time for the Spring Festival that would be held at the end of the month.

Yes, spring was upon you. Your favorite season. It meant warmer temperatures and sunshine and new life.

But despite all the bright cheerfulness that spring brought with it, for your husband, Loki, it also brought with it a certain darkness.

His heat.

Loki was of Jotun blood; a Frost Giant. And with that heritage came certain Jotun traits, some more easily embraced than others. One such trait that your husband found more loathsome than the rest was the Jotun mating cycle.

Each year since his body matured, around the time of the Spring Equinox, Loki would find himself at the mercy of his primal instincts. Unable to control his animalistic urges to mate, he’d lock himself in his chambers until it would pass.

That is, until you had something to say about it.

When you learned of the agony he endured — both physically and emotionally — locked in his chambers for anywhere from one week to one month until his heat cycle passed, you couldn’t bear it. You had to do something to help, if you could.

You remembered the conversation you’d had with him well. It was shortly after your wedding…

————

“Loki, isn’t there anything that would make it easier to endure? Or at least make it come to an end more quickly? I can’t imagine a week of that, let alone a month.”

“Unfortunately, no, darling. There isn’t really anything that can be safely done to help it. The healers can give me an elixir that will suppress it, but I can’t take it every year, or it would lose its effectiveness. And besides, a heat the year after a suppressed heat is always more intense and agonizing.”

Your eyebrow cocked, looking at him with curiosity. “You sound like you’re speaking from experience…?”

He took a deep breath before answering, “Yes, I’ve taken suppressants occasionally in the past. The temptation of a year of reprieve was too great for me to resist at times. But I always found that the following year’s heat was far worse than what is typical. More desperation, more madness, more… pain.”

Your heart broke for him in that moment.

“Why does it last so long, Loki?”

He gave a mirthless chuckle. “It lasts as long as it takes for one of two things to happen. Either it quite literally burns its way out of my system, like a fever that takes weeks to break. Or…”

His voice trailed off, and he looked off into the distance, as if he was searching for his thought amongst the forests and rolling hills.

“Or…?” You gently encouraged him to continue.

Loki let out an exasperated sigh and quietly admitted, “Or… I mate. Breed. Fuck.”

Something about the way he enunciated the hard ‘k’, his Adam’s apple bobbing sinfully as the sound clicked in his throat, had your core throbbing with need and a wave of hot arousal unfolding over your body.

You blinked a few times as you contemplated what he said. “Well that seems easy enough,” you replied cooly, as if you were discussing the weather.

“What…?” He looked at you, perplexed.

“If having a good fuck will bring your agony to an end, then that seems like an easy solution to me. I can help you with that —”

“NO!” His rich baritone voice boomed as it cut you off, dripping with authority, anger, and — was that fear? “You don’t understand, my love. I am not myself when this happens. I lose myself, I lose control. I no longer am capable of keeping up the Asgardian façade; my Jotun form takes over and I am overcome with the primal desire to mate. I lose all regard for decency, I become… a monster. I am a monster.”

“Loki…” you reached a hand up to caress the side of his stupidly beautiful face, running your thumb soothingly along his sharp cheekbone and slotting your palm against his chiseled jaw, which was tightly clenched. A sign of his distress. “I love you, Loki. Let me help you through this.”

“I love you too, darling. More than my life itself. Which is exactly why I can’t let you do this.” He wrapped his large hand around the back of yours and turned his head to the side to tenderly kiss your palm. “It isn’t safe. I could hurt you. Badly.”

“I trust you, Loki. I trust you with my life, no matter what physical form you assume.” The next words you uttered came to you as easily as breathing, “I want to do this. Please. Use me. Use my body to sate your desires and end your own suffering.”

His emerald eyes widened at your words, most likely shocked at how brazen and self-assured they were. But swirling behind the shock was something else. Reverence. Trepidation. And lust.

He slowly swallowed, gathering himself together and collecting his thoughts after you scrambled them with your salacious plea.

“Alright then, darling.” He cautiously relented, his eyes boring into yours, searching for any sign that you were having second thoughts or hints of doubt. “Come springtime, when my next heat cycle is upon me, I’ll let you help me. I’ll let you be the balm that soothes my burning, searing ache.”

————

And now, spring was upon you. And any day now, it would be time to make good on your promise to him. For better or worse. You suddenly had a renewed appreciation for the words you spoke in your wedding vows to him, just 8 months ago.

Loki has been warning you for the past few days that his heat is imminent, and could take over at any time. He could feel it; all the warning signs were there. The restlessness. The irritability. The discomfort. Crawling under his skin like an itch he can't scratch. Until it makes him snap.

Each and every time, he asked if you were still sure. He reminded you that you could change your mind, that he didn't expect you to do this. That he'd never expect you to do this. It was entirely your choice.

And each and every time, you stood firm in your decision. You wanted to help him. You would do this.

The sun was beginning to set on your evening stroll, so you altered your route so that it would lead you back towards the private chambers that you shared with Loki. As you approached the hallway which led to your shared door, you could feel a distinct, unseasonal chill in the air.

Was this it? Was tonight the night?

Once you reached the ornate wooden door, you noticed a thin blanket of frost coating the edges of it, as if, behind the door, was the force of winter itself, its icy chill seeping through the gaps between the door and the frame.

You reflected for a moment on the irony that all this frost and chill was the result of something called a heat, and you couldn't help but chuckle to yourself.

But then you remembered that not just fire, but ice, too, can burn.

A shiver rolled down your spine, and the cold seeping through the doorframe wasn't entirely to blame.

You took a moment to gather your courage, reminding yourself that this was Loki. Your husband. Your one true love.

You could do this.

You softly knocked, each tap of your knuckles against the cold wood sending a jolt of bravery through you.

"Loki... can I come in?"

"Pet..." The voice that answered you was familiar, but more... ragged. It was deeper, if that was even possible, and assumed a huskiness that made your usually gentle husband sound nothing short of feral.

It sent a surge of hot, wet arousal through you, which pooled between your thighs.

"I'm here, Loki..." you whispered like a prayer. "Let me help you."

"This is your last chance, pet," he warned. "You can still change your mind. But the moment you open the door, I'm afraid there will be no going back."

Good thing you had no plans of going back.

You opened the door and stepped into your chambers; after ensuring the door was closed and locked, you took a deep breath. This was it.

As you turned around, you came face to face with your husband.

Except he wasn't quite the Loki you knew. For one thing, he was taller. Much taller. At least 8 feet tall. You briefly wondered how you'd be able to take him in this form. His usually porcelain skin was replaced with a brilliant cerulean, and across every bit of blue that your hungry eyes could find, were ridges that swept across his skin in bold strokes and delicate lines, forming intricate patterns that you longed to trace with your fingers. As your eyes settled on his face, you found some familiarity there. You recognized the bone structure and the shape of his nose, the curve of his lips; the luscious raven locks that framed his angular face were unchanged. But in place of the emerald orbs that you knew and loved were two glistening rubies, staring at you with an intensity that could only be described as ferocious.

He was beautiful. Flawless. You saw no monster before you. Only your husband. Showing you a side of himself that he has kept hidden from you. Until now.

You broke the silence first, and simply muttered, "I love you, and I am here. Use me."

And that was all the permission he needed.

He closed the distance between you impossibly fast, like a predator stalking its prey, and wrapped an icy hand around your throat, squeezing firmly, the coldness stinging like pins and needles against your skin.

His lips met yours with an urgency that you hadn't experienced before; any hint of gentleness was gone and in its place a brutal clash of tongues and teeth as he claimed your mouth, a throaty growl slipping past his lips as he basked in the taste of you on his tongue.

Fear crept up your spine for the first time since you entered, and you brought your small hands up to claw at his wrist, a desperate attempt to let him know that you needed a break; you needed to breathe.

Something within him seemed to get the message, because he peeled his mouth away from yours and released your throat, repurposing his hand to wrap around your midsection and toss you unceremoniously onto the large bed in the center of the room.

You had to admit that part of you enjoyed the way he was manhandling you.

He wasted no time freeing himself from his garments and strode towards the bed, where he situated himself over you, caging in your small frame like a hungry animal about to enjoy the spoils of its hunt.

You gulped at the sight of his enormous cock, as it bobbed angrily against his stomach, covered in the same ridges that decorated the rest of his body, the tip weeping with the evidence of his primal desire. For you.

"These pretty silks have got to go," he rasped against your ear, his breath somehow both hot and cold.

He roughly grabbed the fine fabric and you winced as you heard him rip it to shreds as easily as if your dress was made of flower petals from the garden.

Within seconds, you were bare before him, and his ravenous gaze lazily roamed over your body, savoring every dip and every curve like the sight of you alone could sate him.

Even though that couldn't be further from the truth.

When he decided that his eyes had had their fill, he brought two fingers up to prod against your lips, his gaze meeting yours, daring you to defy him.

But you didn't dare.

You submissively parted your lips and wrapped your mouth around his fingers, astonished at how much your mouth had to stretch just to accommodate them. A wicked smile tugged at his lips as your tongue danced over his digits, preparing them for exploration of another warm, wet hole.

A gasp escaped your lips as his fingers were abruptly pulled from your mouth and pushed inside your weeping cunt. They pumped and stretched you almost as much as his normal cock would, and you shuddered at the thought of what was to come.

The nerves melted away though, as his thumb found your clit and worked the sensitive nub in sweeping circles, pleasure taking over your senses and lulling you into a state of calm.

"Loki..." you whispered softly between your whimpers and pants.

He growled in response, withdrawing his fingers from your soaked pussy and wrapping his hand around your thigh, forcing your legs open as wide as they would go.

Before you had a chance to adjust to the new position, his huge cock was at your slick entrance and he thrust forward, forcing as much of himself inside you as he could, his girth stretching your walls and the tip pushing against your cervix. The sudden intrusion took your breath away, and the stinging pain you felt caused unshed tears to well in your eyes. The coldness of his skin only heightened the sensations, forcing your mouth open in a silent scream as he claimed you.

You loved him. You wanted this. You silently reminded yourself as a large blue hand found your throat once again and wrapped around tightly.

A feral moan left his lips as he began to rut into you roughly. Pushing himself in as far as your body would allow. Over and over. Chasing his own pleasure without regard for your own.

"So warm... So tight... You take me so well, pet." He grunted between thrusts. "You're mine."

You couldn't help the fresh pool of arousal that gushed between your legs in response to his words. Even as he wrecked your body and used it like a toy, you loved nothing more than being his.

His rhythm became sloppy and you knew he was close.

With a wild growl, he pulled out of you and violently flipped you over onto your stomach. You were thankful you were on the mattress and not on the floor in that moment.

His large hands dug into your hips, pulling them upwards and angling you so that he could sink himself once again into your tight cunt. You turned your head to the side, gasping for air between shameless moans as he pounded into you from behind like an animal.

It didn't take long for him to reach his peak; he let out a primal roar as he came, pumping you full of his seed. You felt it leaking out of you, dripping down your inner thighs as he continued to shallowly thrust into you while he rode out his high.

And that was the last thing you remembered before darkness blurred the edges of your vision and you succumbed to exhaustion, your body limp and spent.

--

Later, when you came to, you wiggled your fingers and toes first and slowly worked your way to moving each limb, assessing the soreness. There was an undeniable ache, but nothing you couldn't manage. You sat up in the bed and looked around the room, searching for Loki. Your eyes settled upon his familiar Asgardian form, huddled on the chair in the corner, as if he was putting as much distance as possible between the two of you without leaving you alone. His eyes were red, but not because of his Jotun blood. Because he had been crying.

"Loki, what's wrong?!" you frantically asked.

When he realized you were awake, he rushed to your side. "What's wrong? Love, look at what I've done to you!" He gestured to your body, to the bruises on your inner thighs, your hips, your wrists, your neck. He pointed to the mess between your thighs, to the bit of blood that was on the sheets between your legs. "I'm a monster. A vile, disgusting creature. I should have never let you do this!"

He looked away from you, ashamed.

You reached for his hand, in an effort to reassure him. "Loki, I wanted this. I wanted to help you. I insisted." Your thumb stroked the back of his hand in soothing circles, willing him to believe that you were okay. "And look! It worked. Your heat lasted only a few hours instead of weeks!"

"But at what cost?" He muttered, without meeting your gaze.

"I am your wife. We are a team, in everything. I vowed to be there for you and to love you no matter what, for better or for worse. A few bruises and some soreness are a small price to pay once a year if it means my husband isn't in agony for weeks at a time."

He sheepishly met your gaze then, peering up at you from under his eyelashes.

"I don't deserve you," he whispered softly.

"Yes you do. Because you are the most amazing person I know," you smiled easily as you said it. "Now, I did say we are a team, so if you're done sulking, I do believe it is your turn to do your part. Don't you have some magic healing powers that could soothe some of my aches, or am I misremembering?"

Now it was his turn to smile at you. He got to work straight away, a blanket of green seidr engulfing your body and buzzing through you, soothing away the worst of your residual pain. Then he spent the day spoiling you, running you a hot bath with your favorite rose scented bath oil, pampering you with a massage, and waiting on you hand and foot.

"Darling?"

"Yes, Loki?"

A wolfish grin crept across his lips. "When you've had a day or two to recover, I intend to make last night up to you, tenfold. To drown you in so much pleasure that the only word you'll remember is my name as it falls from your lips like a mantra."

You met his grin with your own cheeky smile. "And I intend to hold you to that, Laufeyson."

His lips met yours, then, in a passionate kiss; one that conveyed all the love and adoration he held for you. Your lover. Your husband. Your everything.

Spring was definitely your favorite season.

--

--

Tagging some lovely people who might be interested. No worries though if not, of course! @lokisgoodgirl @muddyorbsblr @mochie85 @cheekyscamp @give-me-a-moose @sarahscribbles @gigglingtigger @ladyofthestayingpower @mischief2sarawr @holymultiplefandomsbatman @wheredafandomat @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @loopsreacts @maple-seed @fictive-sl0th @coldnique @thomase1 @peachyjinx @superficialdomina @peaches1958 @evelyn-kingsley @simplyholl @tallseaweed @cake-writes @tripleyeeet @lokiandbuckysdoll @vbecker10 @lovelysizzlingbluebird

[scribblesofagoonerr]

You're just like them | buddy & monkey: double the trouble

pairings: leah williamson x reader!monkey x reader!buddy x jordan nobbs

summary: monkey is unhappy to spend the night round jordan's for the first time since the transfer to aston villa and she makes her feelings known

double the trouble masterlist

also thank you to @alotofpockets for help with pics for the header + little ideas to add in along the way

“No,” The words out of your mouth were sharp, you folded your arms across your chest and shook your head stubbornly. You were known to be stubborn at times and today was certainly no different.

“It won’t be that bad,” Leah tried again, her tone being gentle but firm, “And you won’t be on your own, Buddy will be there with you as well.” She pointed out, motioning to your favourite little buddy that is bouncing around happily, blissfully unaware of the tension in the room.

“We’re goin’ to Mama’s house!” Buddy chimed in cheerfully, “Monkey ‘ou can see Blu too!” She’s far more excited about this decision than you are, but then again you suppose she’s used to being there more frequently than you, in fact you’ve not actually been to Jordan’s new place so you have no clue what it’s even like, “I show ‘ou all of my toys!”

“See? Buddy’s excited,” Leah said, motioning to your favourite little buddy with a hopeful smile, “It’ll be fun to be there together!”

“Nope, nuh uh!” You insisted, shaking your head harder, “I don’t wanna go there!”

Leah pinched the bridge of her nose, exhaling a deep sigh, “Monkey, please. I know you don’t want to go, but I would feel more reassured to know you were there–”

“I don’t get why I can’t just come? I’m almost 18!” You interjected, throwing your hands up in the air, “It’s only another month away, it won’t matter!”

“The keyword is that being almost there, Menace,” Leah chuckled, shaking her head in amusement, “Maybe next year my girl, eh?” She joked, ruffling your hair.

“Get off,” You grumbled and tried to dodge her hand from touching your hair still, “I don’t want to go there!”

Tonight was Leah’s birthday party since she couldn’t celebrate much when it was her actual birthday, so the celebrations were delayed until tonight at least.

You were gutted you weren’t allowed to go, sometimes it sucked to not be an adult yet.

Despite your determination to try and change Leah’s mind, she wasn’t overly thrilled with the idea of you coming into a club while being under the age limit and therefor, had the brilliant idea to all but ship you and Buddy off to Jordan’s much to your absolute detest about it 

Hence the whole argument at that current moment that you’re having with her after she’s just dropped the bombshell on you about going there.

“I know you’re not happy about this my girl but it’s just for tonight,” Leah began to speak, “And yes I’m aware you’re almost 18 now but I’m sorry, you’re not staying in the house alone, I don’t know what time I’ll be back and I would feel a lot more comfortable if you were somewhere that I knew you were safe, okay?” She told you firmly, but there’s a hint of a smile on her lips.

“But why do I have to go there though?” You huffed and stomped around in strong disagreement, you definitely weren’t going to agree to going there against your own will, “I’m not going and you can’t make me!”

“Monkey, come on. Don’t make this harder than it has to be,” Leah exhaled a sigh and rested her hands on her hips, “Jordan’s really looking forward to spending time with you both as well.”

“I don’t care, I’m not going! Why can’t I just go to Kim’s house? Or even Wally’s?” You demanded, scrunching your face up in confusion, “Or there’s even Beth and Viv’s as well!”

“Because they will all be coming to the party tonight,” Leah explained patiently, her tone calm despite your attitude overall as she continued to fold a set of Buddy’s clothes and put them in her overnight bag fresh out of the washing basket, “Jordan’s really looking forward to spending time with you and Buddy. It’s been a while since you’ve properly seen her.”

A groan escaped your lips, your frustration bubbling over, “Yeah and there’s been a reason for that,” You murmured, hopping up onto the counter definitely.

“Oi, off there,” Leah swatted at your knee, just like she always does but now you just do it to purposely wind her up, “Will you please just give her a chance?”

Rolling your eyes, you hopped off the kitchen counter, “I don’t want to go, Le,” You mumbled, still standing firm in your protest as you lean up against it and cross your arms.

Leah exhaled a sigh, biting her lip, “Look, I know you’re not thrilled about it, but it’s only for one night–”

 “One night?” You repeated, your eyes widening, “One night? Nah, there’s no fuckin’ way I’m going there and staying overnight! No! You can fuck off if you think I’m doin’ that, Leah!” You hadn’t meant to swear, but you couldn’t help your initial reaction at that very moment, “I thought that I would at least be able to come home tonight after you’re back!”

You especially hadn’t meant to do it in front of Buddy and her little ears.

Buddy gasped, her little eyes wide as saucers, “Monkey, ‘ou said bad words!”

“Tattletale,” You murmured, rolling your eyes.

“Excuse me?” Leah’s eyes narrowed, flashing with anger suddenly. You guess you did just swear at her, what other type of reaction did you expect?

“You’re excused,” You replied, a cocky smile plastered over your face, “I’m not goin’ there!”

“Yes you are,” Leah snapped, her patience now wearing thin, “I get that you’re annoyed and upset about this, but I am definitely not going to stand here and allow you to swear at me like that and think you can get away with it. You don’t have a choice in this, you’re the child and I’m the adult and what I say goes, understood?”

“Urgh, whatever. It wasn’t even directed at you!” You grumbled, completely lying through your teeth but you didn’t want to make the situation worse for yourself, the blonde looked pissed as it was already, “I’m not goin’ there and you can’t make me!”

Leah’s jaw tightened, you can see a flicker of hurt flash across her face, but it’s quickly replaced by the stern expression she usually reserves for you when you’ve pushed things too far, “Monkey,” She said, her voice low and controlled, “You’re going to Jordan’s and that’s final. End of discussion.”

“No I’m not!” You shouted, frustration boiling over, “I don’t even care what you say, she abandoned us– she abandoned me! I’m not goin’ there and you can’t make me!”

The words hung heavy in the air, and for a second, there was silence. Even Buddy seemed to sense the shift in the room, her little face wrinkling with confusion.

“Hey, bubba,” Leah turned her full attention to the little one in the room, very much aware this is a sensitive topic to be discussed around her, “Why don’t you go and choose what toys that you want to take to Mama's house when we go there, huh?” She suggested.

“Yeah!” Buddy’s shout was electrifying, not wasting the time to toddle into the living room and seek out the toys that she wants to bring with her for the unexpected sleepover at Jordan’s house.

Leah took a deep breath, trying to steady herself and you can see the conflict in her eyes, the way she’s fighting between anger and empathy, “Monkey, it wasn’t like that,” She finally said, softer now, “Jord didn’t abandon you. You know she didn’t leave you because she wanted to hurt you, she had to make a choice based on her career and sure, it was a difficult one, but it was something that she needed to do but it wasn’t about her not caring, my girl.”

“But she left us… She left without even thinking twice about it!” You snapped back, your voice trembling with emotion you hadn’t expected to feel, “I asked her to not go and she still did!”

All throughout your life, you have had endless people walking in and out of it.

Your mum abandoned you when you were little and your dad couldn’t wait to wash his hands off you the minute that he could. The 2 most important people in your life just decided to up and leave you, just like that.

It’s one of the many reasons why you keep your walls built up so high because then at least nobody can knock them down and hurt you again, right?

You learned to trust people more when you signed for Arsenal and moved in with Leah and Jordan at the start, you opened up to people who you thought would never leave you, all of them stayed apart from one.

Jordan.

It hurt more than it should’ve done, it just really stung.

The separation between Leah and Jordan was a completely mutual decision between the two of them and you could understand that, in fact even when Jordan moved into a place in London, you would still go there and visit, even spend a few nights there with herself and Buddy when you could.

However, things turned sour when you learnt of the woman’s plans to transfer to Aston Villa in the Winter transfer and from there, you found yourself pushing her away.

If you pushed her away then it would save you from getting hurt too much when you eventually didn’t see her, right?

Wrong.

The day of the move, you found yourself crying and begging her to stay, but she never did.

She left you, she left you and Buddy, and even Leah to some extent.

You couldn’t help but resent her for that now if you’re being honest.

Leah sighed deeply, rubbing a hand over her face as if trying to rub away the tension, “I know it feels like that, my girl,” She said softly, “I know it hurts and I wish I could do anything to make it better, but sometimes people have to make choices that don’t always make sense to us. It doesn’t mean that Jord doesn’t care though, you know she loves both you and Buddy, so much!”

“Well it doesn’t feel like she cares nor can she love us that much if she just chooses to willingly go,” You murmured, shoving your hands in the pockets of your shorts.

“No matter what you think, you know deep down that Jordan does care about you, a whole damn lot,” Leah explained to you gently, her eyes softened ever so slightly, “She didn’t want to go, it was just… look, sometimes life just doesn’t give us the easy option.” 

You continued to scowl, stubbornness etched into your every feature, “Yeah if she really did care then she would’ve stayed, regardless of that and whatever.” You can’t say you’re in the mood to listen, to rationalise, or to forgive. As far as you’re concerned, Jordan chose her career over you, she abandoned you and there’s no good enough excuse for that.

“Look, my girl, I know this isn’t something that you want to do and I know you’re still upset with her about things,” Leah knew this isn’t something that’s going to be fixed with words, but she has to try at least, “I’m not saying you have to forgive her today, or tomorrow, or anytime soon, but I do need you to go there, and just… just give it a chance, please?”

“I… I don’t want to go,” You murmured quietly, shaking your head in defiance. The mere thought of it filled you with resentment.

The blonde exhaled a sigh and ran her hand through her hair, “Please? Just do it for me,” She pauses, “Jord really is looking forward to spending some time with you.” She added.

You let out a derisive scoff, the bitterness evident in your voice, “The feelings’ not mutual there,” You retorted, refusing to meet Leah’s gaze, “Please don’t make me go, Le.”

Leah’s eyes softened with a mix of pleading and resolve, “Do it for Buddy, if not for me.”

The mention of Buddy stung, she didn’t deserve to be caught in the middle of this but of course Leah knows that you would do absolutely anything for your favourite little buddy.

“Fine,” You snapped, pushing yourself off the counter with a huff, “I’ll go there, but don’t expect me to be happy there!”

Leah nodded, relief evident in her eyes despite the tension, “That’s all I’m asking for, my girl,” She said softly, “Just a chance.”

The initial drive to Jordan’s place was mostly filled with a tense silence, apart from Buddy’s cheerful singing from her car seat to none other than the soundtrack of North London Forever that she surprisingly asked for herself and of course Leah was quick to agree to the request. 

You keep your gaze stubbornly fixed out of the window, refusing to look at Leah or engage in any conversation and the blonde, thankfully senses your mood and doesn’t push further, already exhausted from trying to reason with you.

“Alright then, we’re here,” Leah announced, trying to keep the mood cheerful as she glanced between you in the passenger seat and the rear view mirror to see Buddy vibrating with excitement in her car seat.

“Fantastic,” You murmured, your stomach tightening in resentment as you stared out the window, not wanting to move out of your seat.

“Mama!” Buddy squealed from the back of the car, all but trying to unbuckle her own car seat much to her disappointment of not being able to, “Mummy, wan’ out!” She whined in frustration.

“Hold on a second bubba,” Leah chuckled at your favourite little buddy’s general lack of patience, “Mummy will help you to get out in a minute.” She added.

“Do I really have to be here?” You asked, frowning as you looked at Leah for a response, which you definitely already knew the answer to.

“You already know my answer to that,” Leah retorted, exhaling a sigh as she turned the car ignition off before unbuckling her seatbelt, “It’s just one night.” She reminded you.

“Worth a shot I guess,” You huffed in response and slowly moved to unbuckle your own seatbelt.

“It won’t be that bad,” Leah attempted to reassure you, giving you a soft smile before she opened her car door and climbed out of it to walk round to the side Buddy is to set her free from her car seat, “Right then, my little bubba. Are you ready to go and see your Mama?”

“I see Mama!” Buddy shouted excitedly as Leah unbuckled her and lifted her up to place her on the ground, “Mama! Mama!” She continued to squeal in delight.

“Yeah, we’re gonna go and find Mama,” Leah smiled genuinely at her 2 year old’s excitement as she held her in her arms as she turned back to look to where you’re still sat in the car, “You’re going to have to get out sooner rather than later, you know?” She told you, amusedly.

“I choose later,” You murmured, barely louder than a whisper, reluctant to climb out of the car any time soon, “Better yet, I’ll just stay in here and come back home with you.”

Leah exhaled a sigh and opened the car door, “Get out of the car, Menace,” She paused as she adjusted Buddy to sit on her hip, “Come on, just give it a chance, please?” She asked.

“Don’t have a choice,” You grumbled under your breath as you slowly climbed out of the car and stood there with your hands shoved in your pocket while you looked further unimpressed, “Are you sure I can’t come tonight? Nobody would even notice I was there, it’ll be fine!”

“No,” Leah kept a firm face as she slammed the car door shut behind you, locking her BMW before starting to walk up the steps of Jordan’s house, who had already clocked the car and came to answer the front door, “Bubba, look it is!”

“Mama! Mama!” Buddy immediately leaned towards Jordan the minute that she clocked her and you couldn’t help but dawdle behind with a scowl etched on your face.

“Hi, Buddy!” Jordan exclaimed, reaching out to scoop Buddy into her own arms as she hugged her gently, “I’ve missed you so so much!”

“Mama you’re silly, you saw me yesterday!” Buddy’s giggles were infectious as she reminded Jordan that she did indeed see her yesterday, having it be your favourite little buddy’s birthday yesterday when she finally turned 2 years old.

“Oh of course I did but I miss you all the time,” Jordan retorted playfully as she tickled Buddy under her armpits which caused the 2 year old to laugh even more, “Or is that not allowed now?”

“Where Blu?” The 2 year old asked eager to see the little four legged dachshund and you must admit that you’ve been excited to see him if anything else.

“He’s inside the house and he’s so excited to see you both,” Jordan told the toddler, placing her down on the ground before she toddles inside the house, “Hiya, little one!”

“Don’t call me that,” You said like the words are venomous to you in that moment.

“Oh, sorry,” Jordan was immediately apologetic as she shared a concerned look with Leah, “It’s so great to have you both here, I, er, I didn’t think you would come.” She admitted, scratching the back of her neck awkwardly.

“Yeah well I didn’t want to be here, but well, I wasn’t given much choice about it regardless,” You grumbled the truth and continued with your carefree attitude you have going on.

“Monkey, don’t be rude,” Leah chided you for your lack of manners, giving you a pointed look.

“What? I’m just being truthful!” You mumbled, shrugging your shoulders carelessly, “I told you I would come but I didn’t say I’d be nice about things.” You added, honestly.

Leah pursed her lips and narrowed her eyebrow, “Hey, come on. We talked about this.”

“Be grateful I’m even here,” You murmured in response, choosing to have more interest with your phone in your hand than to look between the two old, “Cos’ I really don’t wanna be.”

“Enough of this,” Leah scolded you, “This is Jord’s home and you need to at least be respectful of that, regardless whether you want to be here or not, okay? I don’t want to hear about you being rude this time that you’re here!”

“Ugh, whatever,” You brushed past the older women inside the house with your hood up and slumped down on the sofa.

“Look Monkey it’ Blu!” Buddy motioned to the small dachshund puppy that you hadn’t seen in a good while and you did have to admit that you missed him an awful lot.

“Hi boy! Hi!” You crouched down and gave the puppy some fuss, “Oh, I have missed you!”

“I’m sorry about her,” Leah apologised for your rude behaviour, “She’s just… well she’s a teenager for a start and she’s still not exactly handling it well that you’re not just five minutes down the road now.”

“That’s okay, I know what she’s like. Monkey’s stubborn and if she doesn’t want to do something then she won’t, will she?” Jordan retorted, exhaling a sigh, “She really didn’t want to come that bad, huh?”

The blonde bit her bottom lip and shook her head, “I’m sorry Jord, but I’m sure things will get better. You just have to give it time and be patient with her, even if it’s difficult.”

“Don’t be, it’s fine,” Jordan replied, smiling at her ex girlfriend, “I can understand if she’s still upset about me moving to Aston Villa, I guess it’s just a lot to handle for her, huh?”

Leah shared a weary smile with her ex girlfriend, “If it gets too much then let me know and I’ll have a word with her, because despite how she feels, she’s not allowed to be rude.” She made her point evidently clear.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Jordan reassured Leah with a soft smile, “You deserve to have the night off and enjoy your party tonight, don’t worry about either of the kids, they’ll be fine.”

“It's not so much Buddy I’m worried about, it’s more so Monkey,” Leah admitted, shaking her head as she jiggled her car keys in her hand, “I’ve already dealt with both her delightful attitude and language before we left the house and she knows I’m not putting up with it.”

“Oh, bad morning?” Jordan winced in response, “I had no idea moving to another club would have this much effect on her.” She admitted, ultimately regretting the decision there at that very moment.

“It’s a change and Monkey doesn’t cope with them but she’ll get used to it, Jord,” Leah reassured her ex girlfriend, “It just means things around the house are a little bit tense right now, but she’ll get used to it soon enough.”

“But in the meantime you get the brunt of her delightful teenage attitude? That’s not right,” Jordan frowned, hating the idea of you taking most of your anger out on the blonde, “I’m sorry you're having to deal with that.”

“It’s alright, I totally expected it honestly,” Leah admitted as she exhaled a sigh, “It won’t last forever and she knows I won’t stand for it, I was this close to grounding her after she swore at me earlier.” She adds, her patience wearing thin for your lovely words directed towards her.

“Understandable,” Jordan smiled wearily as she scratched the back of her neck, “I don’t have much hope to fix everything in an instant but I can at least try my hardest.” She tells her.

“Just don’t give up on her,” Leah told her as she shared a knowing look with Jordan as she popped her head into the living room and smiled when she saw you’ve joined Buddy on the floor to give Blu some fuss, “Seems just like old times, eh?” She joked, gesturing for Jordan to look in the living room.

“I swear I have a photo identical to this taken last year,” Jordan joked lightly as she moved further into the living room, “I was thinking that we could have pasta for dinner tonight? Monkey, I know it’s one of your favourites… unless it’s changed?” She asked, hesitant for the backlash from you.

“No thanks, I’m not hungry,” You respond politely as you could while seeing the warning luck that Leah is giving you in case you comment something less polite.

“Monkey, you didn’t eat much for breakfast nor did you have anything for lunch,” Leah frowned and shook her head, “You love pasta, especially the way Jord makes it!”

“Not hungry,” You repeated with a tight lipped smile on your face, going back to staring at your phone in your hand and scrolling through Instagram.

“That’s okay,” Jordan agreed with you, “I’ll go ahead and start to make it, I’ll leave some out for you in case you decide you're a bit hungry.” She told you, although you doubt you would want to eat it.

“Right then,” Leah spoke up as she looked towards both you and Buddy, “I’m going to head off back home to get ready, I’ll leave you three to it.”

“Thanks, Le,” Jordan replied, smiling at her ex, “I hope you enjoy your party tonight and celebrate.”

“Oh I intend too,” Leah couldn’t help but grin playfully at her ex, “Much better to know that the girls are both here with you as well.” She added.

“They’re safe with me,” Jordan promised, “Enjoy your party and don’t worry about things here, it’ll be fine.”

“Here’s hoping so– Monkey, be good!” Leah warned, pointing her index finger directly at you, “Remember what I said.”

“Yeah, yeah,” You murmured, rolling your eyes.

“Mummy, wait for me. I didn’t say bye to you!” Buddy came rushing over to Leah and threw her little arms around her.

“Oh how could I leave without saying bye to my little bubba?” Leah leaned down and cupped Buddy’s face in her hands before she peppered her face with kisses, “Be good for your Mama, okay? I love you lots and lots!”

“Love ‘ou lots and lots, Mummy!” Buddy told her, continuing to hug Leah tightly.

“Not as much as I love you, my little bubba,” Leah genuinely smiled at the 2 year old before she turned her attention to you as she walked nearer to where you sat on the sofa, “And I love you too, my grumpy girl.” she told you, placing a kiss on your forehead, much to your own protest about it.

“Leah man, get off,” You grumbled, trying to swat her hand away from touching you, “Bye!”

Leah and Jordan shared another apprehensive look with one another, “Don’t worry, I’ve got it under control here. I’ll text you if anything bad happens,” Jordan reassured her, “Enjoy the night, honestly.”

“Okay, okay,” The blonde exhaled a sigh and runs her hand through her hair, “I’ll have my phone with me the whole time, so you can still text me if you need too,” She said, looking more towards you to reassure you that you can still get in touch with her if needed.

“Prepared to be spammed with gifs,” You murmured, a mischievous glint in your eye as you don’t even bother to look up from your phone in your hand, “Can’t say I didn’t warn you either.” You added.

“Mama! Mama!” Buddy’s voice was the centre of conversation with Jordan as the two of them played together on the carpet in front of you with some of the cars that your favourite little buddy brought from home, “Me cars’ red like Mummy’s team!”

Jordan’s eyes lit up in amazement as she smiled at the 2 year old, “That’s right, clever girl! What colour is this car?” She wondered, holding up the dark blue coloured car.

“Blue!” Buddy retorted, excitedly, “Like, not Mummy’s team!” She added.

“Well done, Buddy,” Jordan praised the toddler, “You’re getting more and more smart every day, kiddo!” She told her.

You couldn’t help but sit there and roll your eyes. You didn’t care much to contribute to the conversation Jordan and Buddy were having, you would much rather be interested to sit on your phone like you planned to do, at least your TikTok page was a good distraction.

“Alright, I should probably start dinner soon,” Jordan said, realising the time on the clock on the wall, moving to get up from the floor as she looked at you, “Will you please keep an eye on Buddy for me while I sort that out?” She asked.

Glancing up from your phone, you couldn’t help but huff and place it beside you, “Yeah whatever, but not for you though, I’m only doing it for Buddy,” You told her, bluntly as possible.

“Oh, yeah that’s fine,” Jordan responded, swallowing the lump that formed in her throat as she tries to not feel too hurt by that comment but the reality of it was that it really bothered her - You used to be so close with her, you would follow her around like a little shadow and not you want nothing to do with her at all, it really stung.

“Monkey, will ‘ou play with me?” Buddy’s little voice chirped as she peered up to look at you with hopeful eyes, “We build lego!”

“How can I say no to my favourite little buddy?” A small small appeared on your face as you slid off the sofa to join Buddy on the floor, she had all but completely abandoned her cars she was previously playing with in favour of the lego bricks that she attempted to drag over from the corner of the room, “Too heavy, Monkey!” She whines in frustration.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got them, Bud,” You giggled and stood up to easily move and pick up the lego bricks, “See? They’re not that heavy, you just needed a strong big sister to lift them up,” You joked with her.

“Thank ‘ou!” Buddy squealed and immediately dived into the box to start pulling out the different colourful lego bricks, “Monkey, ‘ou start with this one and I start with this one!” She declared, handing you a green block.

“Why can’t I have the one you have?” You asked playfully, pointing to the red block that she had in her hands, “I prefer that one.”

“No, that’s my block. ‘Ou have the green one!” Buddy’s little voice demands firmly, pushing the green block back into your hand, “I like red better!”

“Of course you do,” You retorted, grinning in amusement, “What colour is North London, Buddy?”

“Red!” Buddy declared loudly.

“Ain’t that right, Bud!” You nodded in agreement, “Guess I can agree to stick with the green block just for you.” You added, shrugging your shoulders as the two of you start to build together.

However that didn’t stop the two of you squabbling about the rest of the blocks though.

“What’s going on in here then?” Jordan popped her head round the door as she heard the commotion coming from the living room, “I thought you two would be playing nicely in here, eh?”

“Mama!” Buddy’s lower lip trembled a little, her big eyes filling up with frustration, “Monkey’s not sharing and letting me the ‘ellow block!” She whined, pointing accusingly at you.

“You're such a tattletale sometimes,” You rolled your eyes, feeling the frustration building inside of you, “You wanted me to play with you, Buddy! How am I supposed to build something if you keep taking them all?” You argued, crossing your arms over your chest defensively.

Jordan sighed and knelt down to the toddlers level, “Buddy, you know if you want Monkey to play with you then you have to share,” She reminded her, “Even if you like the certain coloured blocks.”

“But you don’ understand Mama, I like them ones. Monkey can have others!” Buddy pouted, clearly not liking the answer, “My blocks!” She declared, keeping a tight hold of them.

“Whatever, I don’t care,” You remarked, feeling your own frustration simmering as you do no more than push the tower over that Buddy’s been building in anger, “Oops.”

“M’ Tower!” Buddy’s whined, her upset clearly evident as the tears began to form in her big eyes, her lower lip quivering, “Monkey, ‘ou ruined it!”

“Oh well,” You shrugged carelessly and sidestepped over it to make your way back to sit on the sofa again.

“Monkey!” Jordan’s eyes widened in disbelief at your current attitude, especially towards your favourite little buddy of all people before she was quick to scoop the upset 2 year old onto her lap, “Hey, it’s okay, Buddy. We can just build it again, yeah?” She reassured her, hoping to calm the situation.

Buddy continued to sob and cling to Jordan, “I no wan’ build with Monkey, she’s a meany!”

You couldn’t lie and say that didn’t hurt your feelings because it definitely did to hear it out of the toddlers’ mouth even if she didn’t quite understand the words that she was saying.

“It’s just a tower,” You muttered, rolling your eyes as you turned your attention back to your phone in your hand again to scroll through your social media feeds, “It’s not a big deal.” You added, feeling a tiny bit guilty for upsetting the toddler.

Jordan exhaled a sigh and continued to cradle an upset Buddy in her arms as she turned her attention towards you to address the situation, “Hey, little one–”

“Don’t call me that!” You snapped at her, feeling so much hatred towards the woman in that very moment, “I’m not your little one anymore. You of all people don’t get to call me that!” 

Jordan’s face fell, the weight of your words hitting her like a punch to the gut. You watched her blink a few times, trying to process the sting of your outburst while still holding Buddy close.

“Okay,” The woman said quietly, her voice trembling slightly but still calm, “Look, I know you’re upset right now and I’m sorry li– Monkey, I am, but regardless of that, it’s not okay to upset Buddy like you did,” She told her, her tone gentle but still firm.

“Whatever, I don’t care,” You muttered, not having any interest in this conversation with Jordan at that moment, “You can’t tell me what to do either, you don’t get the right to do that anymore!”

“I know,” Jordan mumbled, exhaling a sigh as she knows that you’re really upset with her and she’s not going to push you to talk to her, “Right, Buddy. How about you come with me into the kitchen while Mama cooks dinner and that way we can give Monkey a bit of space, yeah?”

“Uh huh,” Buddy sniffled and nodded, her little face still wet with tears as she was reluctant to let go of Jordan anytime soon with her arms wrapped firmly around the older woman.

“Come on then,” Jordan murmured softly, standing up with the toddler in her arms as she casted one more glance in your direction, her expression a mixture of concern and sadness, “Take the time you need to calm down, Monkey. If you need me then we’ll be in the kitchen.” She added, before turning towards the kitchen.

“I won’t,” You stated coldly, although you couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt tugging at your chest, but you did your best to shove it down and turn your attention back to your phone.

Had you really meant to come across that horrible?

The frustration you felt was evident and you had to remember that Jordan left you, one of the people that used to be a constant source of comfort and support and now she was just gone, but it was her own fault for leaving when she did, so maybe she did deserve the resentment you were showing towards her after all.

You were even more reluctant to join them for dinner, even if pasta was your favourite dinner sometimes but you were too stubborn to give in.

You were somewhat glad that Jordan seemed to sense that you didn’t want to be bothered and didn’t start up another conversation with you, at least until it came time to put Buddy to bed later that night.

“I’m about to go and put Buddy to bed,” Jordan said after coming back through the living room with the toddler ready for bed in fresh pajamas and wet hair from the bath.

You did have to admit that it hurt a little bit when the toddler didn’t reach towards like she usually did, but you suppose that you were mean when you pushed her tower over.

“Okay, have fun with that,” You muttered, continuing to give her the cold shoulder.

Jordan adjusted Buddy in her arms, “Maybe after that, we could sit and watch a film? You still like Shrek, don’t you?” She offers, hoping to start an olive branch from that.

“Not in the mood,” You murmured, reluctant to look up your phone where you currently had previously been spamming Leah with gifs like you had promised, you were so gutted you weren’t old enough to be there in the club with everyone else and had to be stuck here instead with Jordan.

“For Shrek?” Jordan questioned, tilting her head to the side in shock, “Oh, I never thought I’d see the day. Alright, how about one of those Marvel films? I remember you used to absolutely love–”

“No,” You interjected, scowling at her menacingly, “I don’t want to watch a movie with you, and I don’t want to talk about the past either. You left, remember? That’s on you!”

“Oh, uh well then that’s alright,” Jordan stammered, lost for words in that current moment, “Um, I’m just gonna go and put Buddy to bed then.” She added, quick to escape to the safe haven of the toddlers’ bedroom and leave you to sulk in the living room.

You felt a pang of guilt but then you remembered that Jordan brought this on herself. She’s the one that left you, it wasn’t the other way around.

She deserves to be treated this way.

You weren’t left to stew in your thoughts for very long before Jordan wandered back through into the living room, you hoped that she might just leave you to it but you were sadly mistaken with that as she came to join you on the sofa as she grabbed a hold of the remote and turned the TV on to find something decent to watch.

You were fine enough to not have to speak to her while you just continued to sit there on your phone, you suppose you could have gone and sat in your bedroom but that just felt a bit lonely.

It was awkward though for the two of you just sat in a tense silence before Jordan was the first to start up a conversation, “Monkey,” The woman began to speak as she looked towards you, “Do you, uh, do you think we could talk?” She questioned, hesitantly.

Exhaling a deep sigh, you didn’t break eye contact from your phone at all, “I have nothin’ to say to you,” You murmured bluntly, continuing to scroll your Instagram stories. You had seen several private stories of the girls at Leah’s birthday party tonight and you can’t help but be envious that you couldn’t be there instead.

“Okay, well how about you just listen and I talk then instead?” Jordan suggested, wearily as she muted the TV show she’d stuck on, “Look, I know that things have been tough since I transferred to Aston Villa, but you have to understand I did it for the right reasons.”

“You left,” You sneered at her, cold and heartlessly.

Why couldn’t you be at Leah’s party instead of being stuck here in this current situation?

It wasn't fair!

Speaking of the blonde, she had sent you a delightful text that you somewhat made sense off right at the moment.

captain buzzkill 🙄🫡 Hi my cheeky monkeey! 🐒 I hoep you’re not causin any trouble for jord and pease don’t give her a hard time. she loves you so mcuh and I love you so mcuh. lots and lots like jelly tots my girl 💕💕 I’ll see you tomorrrow xxx

You couldn’t help but giggle at the state of her text message, it was very clear that she was very drunk already by the lack of words spelled correctly but it was nice then even when she was out partying and having a good time, she still thought about you and checked in to make sure you were okay throughout.

“What’s so funny?” Jordan questioned, curiously as she peered up from looking at her own phone.

“Nothin’ just something one of the girls sent me from college,” You lied to her, not wanting to tell her it was actually Leah.

Jordan hummed in agreement, “Oh right,” She paused, “Hey, do you uh, do you want to have a game of Fifa?” She suggested another attempt to try and make amends.

“No I’m good,” You were quick to agree.

“That’s okay,” Jordan replied, sounding disheartened.

You huffed and stood up from the sofa, “I don’t want to play video games, I don’t want to watch anything and I certainly don’t want to talk to you,” You told her bluntly, not giving her the chance to speak again, “I’m going to bed,” With that, you made your quick escape down the hallway to your bedroom that you had here.

Although you didn’t make a direct beeline for your bedroom, instead crept quietly inside the toddlers’ bedroom, “Buddy?” You whispered quietly, praying that she wasn’t already asleep.

“Monkey?” Buddy’s little head popped up from her cot with her dummy bobbing gently in her mouth as her eyes lit up when she saw you, before she reached her arms out.

A small smile tugged at your lips, a sense of relief washing over you that she still wanted you despite the way you had acted earlier, “Yeah, it’s just me,” You murmured softly, leaning over the bars of the cot to scoop her up gently. 

Making sure to grab Buddy’s blanket, you wrapped it around her to keep her warm, before sitting down with her in the rocking chair, “I wanted to say sorry for upsetting you earlier.”

“Ou’ were mean,” Buddy mumbled, her words muffled by her dummy still in her mouth as she nuzzled her head against your chest, “Ou’ broke the tower.”

“I’m sorry I did that,” You whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head as you felt the guilt of earlier weighing heavily, “That was really mean of me to do it and I didn’t mean to get so angry about things either.”

“Ou’ mean to Mama too,” Buddy said, her eyes peering up at you with quiet sadness, “Ou’ made Mama sad. Don’ like Mama sad.”

Your breath caught in your throat at her words, “I know,” You murmured softly, your fingers gently running through her soft curls, “It’s just… You wouldn’t really understand it, Buddy. It’s complicated.”

Buddy nuzzled closer, the rhythmic sound of your heartbeat soothing her, but words still echoed in your mind. You didn’t want to upset anyone, least of all your favourite little buddy, “I don’t want to ever upset you, Buddy. Do you forgive me?” You asked, your voice filled with hope.

“I forgive ‘ou, Monkey,” Buddy replied softly, her tiny arms wrapping around you in a forgiving embrace, “Ou’ have to be nice to Mama too!”

You couldn’t help but smile at her innocence, though her words stung a little, “Yeah, I’ll try, Bud,” You murmured, gently rocking her as you stared out into the dimly lit room, “Things are just a bit tricky at the minute for me to do that, but I’ll try.”

It was easier said than done and you know there’s still a long way to go before you are willing to accept the apology any time soon, but at least Buddy seemed satisfied enough with your answer as her little hand gripped your shirt and continued to rest her head against your chest.

“I love you, Buddy,” You whispered, pressing another soft kiss to the top of her head, “You’re the best little sister I could ever wish for.” 

The comfort of your embrace lulling Buddy to sleep in your arms, her breath slow and steady against you and for a moment, the weight of everything seemed to lift, feeling the connection that only you two shared.

What you didn’t realise was that Jordan had overheard the entire conversation through the baby monitor that you forgot was still in Buddy’s bedroom. Her heart melted at the tender conversation between you and Buddy, and although she understood that you were seriously upset with her, it left her with some hope that just maybe, things between you both would be okay eventually one day.

You hadn’t expected to wake up in a panic like you did, you felt as if your heart was racing and your breath was quickened. Looking around the dimly lit, unfamiliar room, your surroundings felt too large, too cold and you didn’t like it at all.

Disorientated, you threw your duvet off you as it felt like you needed to escape from it.

Of course you had another nightmare, typically, it was about both of your biological parents this time round. You guess your mum leaving you had been on your mind lately, overshadowing Jordan’s absence in your life now, it brought up a whole lot of unwanted feelings, all over again.

Making your way into the kitchen to pour yourself a glass of water, you succeed with that task until you take a misstep, tripping over one of Blu’s toys in the process and go flying, the glass falling out of your hands and smashing into pieces on the floor.

“Monkey?” Jordan’s voice spoke softly, appearing in the kitchen as her concern was evident, “It’s late. What’re you doin’ up at this time?”

Standing there frozen in the kitchen staring at the shattered glass on the floor until the woman’s voice broke you out of your trance, “Uh, I… I just wanted to grab a glass of water. I tripped over Blu’s toy and it fell out of my hands,” You admitted, looking around to spot the dustpan and brush, “I’ll clean it up now.”

Jordan shook her head in disagreement and was careful to not step directly in the glass, “Careful, you’ll get glass in your feet,” She told you, moving to grab the dustpan and brush out of the cupboard where it’s kept, “Stay there and let me sweep it up, okay? I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t… I didn’t mean to do that. I’m really sorry!” The tired state you were in overshadowed the anger you felt towards the older woman, immediately apologetic for what had happened due to past childhood trauma.

“Hey it’s okay, it’s just a glass,” Jordan reassured you, finishing sweeping up the broken glass and dumping it in the bin, “Do you want me to get you another drink?” She questioned, turning to look at you.

“No it’s okay, I… I’m just gonna go back to bed,” You murmured, shaking your head and turning in the direction to head back down the hallway to your bedroom without another word.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Jordan’s words made you snap your head back around and glare at her, “Was that the reason that you’re awake?”

“No,” You growled at her, not wanting to talk about things as you started to wake up  and were more aware of the conversation you were having with the woman.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Jordan offered you, evident concern in her voice.

“No, not with you I don’t,” You snapped, continuing to scowl at her, “You… You abandoned me as well when things got tough!”

Jordan frowned and shook her head, “Monkey, I haven’t abandoned you. I’m still here,” She paused, “I know it’s hard to understand that, but look, I’m still here, even if it might not seem like it right now.”

“Yes you did!” You shouted, pointing your index finger directly at her, “Yes you did!” You repeated.

“Hey, please keep your voice down,” Jordan reminded you, her tone gentle but still firm, “Buddy’s asleep, remember? I don’t want you waking her up.”

You couldn’t help scoffing and rolling your eyes, “Oh of course you only care about that.”

“I care about you too, little one–” Jordan began to tell you.

“You don’t get to call me that anymore, you left me!” You interjected, your voice a bit louder than you realised it was.

“I’m still here, Monkey,” Jordan murmured, trying to get through to you.

“No you’re not!” You exclaimed, shaking your head in disagreement, “You left, you’re just… you’re just like them!”

“Monkey–” Jordan began to speak in a calm tone of voice.

“Mama,” The conversation was broken up by Buddy waking up, making her upset well known.

Jordan exhaled a sigh, “I’m going to take care of Buddy and try to get her back to sleep,” She paused, running her hands through her hair, “Try and get some sleep, kid. Just know I’ll always be here for you,” With that, she walked past you to head into Buddy’s room and you are once again left feeling bad for waking up your favourite little buddy.

Could you really ever forgive her for just abandoning you in the way she did?

Right now, it really didn’t seem possible for that to happen at all, but maybe time will tell eventually.

© scribblesofagoonerr

[cipher-the-sidhe]

“You cannot speak to him,” Moon says as he sets his hand over your mouth, silencing you. You don’t have the strength to resist, much less stay conscious, but your heart begins pounding.

“You cannot look at him,” Sun says gently but with a great deal of warning in his voice as he covers your eyes with his dark digits. You’re in the dark. The speed of your breath through your nose picks up as you become hyper-alert through the fog of tiredness.

“You cannot listen to him,” they say together, voices overlaid and sending your pulse spiking as arms reach across your chest as your familiars cover the ear opposite of them. Together, their combined efforts hold you in a cage of their palms.

You’re made deaf. You’re in the dark. You’re held silent.

Perhaps you have tempted an evil into this world you were not ready for.

. ✨✨🌙✨✨✨🌙🌙✨✨✨🌙🌙✨✨

From @naffeclipse ‘s “Double Toil and Trouble”

I love this scene and this fic and I wish wish wish I had time to do a proper illustration but I DONT, so I did this instead and it’ll have to do.

[thebat-musicman]

WIPS I COULD REREAD OVER AND OVER AGAIN:

Wants and Needs (well, mostly wants): Chefs kiss, I am in love. Tim is so evil and so cute. Such long chapters that i totally love.

1-800-Gotham: SO MANY MISUNDERSTANDINGS!!!! All the bats want to adopt Jax and think Angel is evil.

Drake’s Spoiled Brat (I’m sorry Dad): As you can see I am a SLUT for Tim joining the batfamily late or early. This is also filled with identity shenanigans which are my favorite.

little menace: He’s such a cute little monster. Timmy is deaged to a vaguely evil toddler which is just awesome.

Double Trouble: CHAOS LORD TIM. Nothing else exists of this which is so disappointing as im in love now.

Jason Todd’s Guide on How to be Haunted with Minimal Stress: MWAH I AM KISSING THIS. I literally reread this the second i finished it. If it’s abandoned i will host a funeral. Dick, Tim, and Damian are sent back in time and Robin!Jason mistakes them as ghosts. They’re all surprised by what a sweet innocent child he is.

god turned human: Percy Jackson crossover. It only updates once a month which is so sadddd. I need to know where it’s going.

[furashuban]

Fairy Memories

Words: 200

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/57228424

Summary: Johanna remembers being a kid and meeting Hilda in the Fairy Isle.

Curled up cozily on the sofa, Hilda kept herself busy with her sketchbook over her lap and a pencil on hand. She drew herself and Twig strolling along fairy country, and beside her was a younger girl, staring and grinning back at her as they held each other’s hands and pressed on.

“Aww, Hilda, that looks lovely,” Johanna admired, taking a seat beside her daughter.

“Thanks, mum,” Hilda held up her artwork for her and Johanna to behold, “it’s been helping me relax drawing our time at the Fairy Isle. Well, all the good parts about it, at least.” She carried on putting the finishing touches on the gargantuan mushrooms and overgrown shrubs surrounding the girls as her mother watched closely.

“I still have memories of that day, you know,” said Johanna, “You finding me alone while I was crying, exploring fairy country together, yet somehow, it really feels like that happened so long ago for me. I always realize one thing whenever I look back on it, though.”

Hilda looked up at her mother curious, and Johanna grinned softly, caressing her cheek in return.

“It’s that you aren’t just my daughter, Hilda, you've always been my best friend, too.”

[welcometololaland]

Double, Double, Acting Trouble | RWRB | 30k | E

(for @clottedcreamfudge. thank you to @celeritas2997 for beta reading)

I don't really have any way to describe this fic except to say that if you've ever wanted to read the most unhinged version of Alex and Henry getting together (in a crack-taken-seriously way), then this fic is for you. It features a divorce subplot (not Alex and Henry), a sea cucumber in a pickle costume, sushi for breakfast and a rat with half a tail named Henry.

Alex, Nora and Henry stare blankly at Professor Jenemy for a long moment before Henry sighs. “Sir, is that really the point of the play?” “Yes.” “I thought the point of the play was sea cucumbers,” Nora mutters under her breath. “Would a hug suffice?” Henry offers hopefully. “A long one?” Nora adds. “We can make it extra tender. I can leap into his arms—” “A hug could be interpreted as platonic,” Professor Jenemy argues. “It must be a kiss.” “Idea,” Alex offers, seemingly without thinking. “Nora and I swap roles.” Professor Jenemy’s jaw drops open. “In what world does that make sense?” “She doesn’t want to kiss Henry and I…wouldn’t say no,” Alex amends quickly. “And besides, I’m a better kisser.”

Read more on Ao3

[argonaut--keene]

Okay fuck it, even if I don't finish it anytime soon or ever, I have 40 chapters of this fic that have been waiting to see the light of day for years and you know what, they're good, so I'm going to share them. Get ready, it's time to find Another Way

[eskiix]

Roberto/OC Enemies-to-Lovers, Post-Villa

Chapter 6

Read on Ao3

Summary: Louise cares too much about everything, and the only thing Roberto cares about is his career. Neither is strictly true, but that's how everyone sees them. Including each other. —-- Just when Louise thinks everyone’s moving on and leaving her behind, she’s handed the golden opportunity to fix everything by planning her best friend’s hen do. At least, that’s the idea, anyway. One week of sun, sea, cocktails, clubbing, and… the world’s most arrogant pilot.

[lupine-trees]

humility

[ for @microficmay day 14. drarry | rating: t | word count: 254 | part 12 | part 1 here | read the full story here ♡⋆˙ ]

— — —

After a morning of broom maintenance and more testing on his (as-yet-in-progress) training wheels charm, Harry finds Draco in the tertiary lab. It’s small and unadorned and the one McGonagall set aside for Draco to complete his Owl-post potions mastery program.

Draco sits at his scattered desk, flipping through envelopes and scribbling into his notebook. The work table is a stark contrast, organized carefully, neat as a pin. A small pewter cauldron bubbles over the low simmer of a charmed hearth stone.

“Wolfsbane?” Harry murmurs, finally catching Draco’s attention.

His gaze snaps up, a smile flicking over his face before falling away.

“The mod I’ve been working on. I’m trying to imbue some of the elements of a Pepper-Up, so the characteristic crash isn’t quite so abrupt, but the bicorn horn and the occamy egg powder are counteractive— I mean, obviously. I thought I could use dried occamy as a substitute, but it doesn’t perform as efficiently alongside the necessary dosage of Sopophorous beans.”

He taps his fingers across the desktop, thoughtful.

“I’m wondering if I could supplement the dried occamy with porcupine quills, but there have been limited studies on their interactions, and nothing that’s gone to the clinical stages, and I don’t really have time to start from scratch, at least not right now, but I thought— what?” Draco falters.

“Nothing,” Harry says, lopsided grin unchecked.

Draco frowns.

“You’re remarkable,” Harry huffs, approaching his desk.

The tips of Draco’s ears go pink.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he says.

“Don’t be modest,” Harry answers.

[mrsbsmooth]

It was out of the question, it was completely off the table. It was unacceptable, unfeasible, unthinkable, and plain and simple, not going to happen.

She curled her arms around Lewie’s neck, whispering to him.

“Caden can’t know.”

___________________________________________

Katie doesn't date footballers. Her twin brother makes damn sure of it. Until... she falls for one.

Read now on AO3

💕 Forbidden romance // Football AU

💕 Rated E for explicit (it’s me, duh)

💕 4 chapters, 16k+ words

[rebelrayne]

Chapter 3: your night on AO3

start from the beginning // fic summary

Fumbling with his phone, it tapped on the desk before he caught it in his hand again. He looked up and shot her a dirty look; his dark hazel eyes glared through slits and his nose wrinkled as he clicked his tongue. “Do you even know how to knock, or were you just raised without manners, Nat?” “Do you even know what time it is, or were you raised without manners?” Her arms uncrossed, one falling to her side. Lifting her other hand, she snapped her fingers with wide, unbelieving eyes. “Some of us have places to be, Hamish! Not everyone wants to be a workaholic with no plans or reasons to be at home.” Maybe most people didn’t have plans to go out because it was Monday night, but it was also January 9th and Nat’s twenty-fifth birthday. Not that Hamish would have known that; he’d kept himself holed up in his office avoiding her all day after his embarrassing defeat earlier at her reception desk. Not that she’d have wanted to eat vanilla cake with buttercream frosting from B Cakes with Hamish anyway. Honestly, it was the best gift he could have given her—too bad he was ruining it by loitering at work and kept her from locking the office up. Hamish Lennox-Ross was being a selfish dick. Shocker!

[scribblesofagoonerr]

— the haunting nightmares of the past | buddy & monkey: double the trouble

here's a piece of angst for you all to read.

thanks to @alotofpockets for her help a long the way with this one.

summary: the anniversary of monkey's dad's death causes a lot of bad memories of the past to resurface.

pairings: leah williamson x reader!monkey x jordan nobbs x reader!buddy

warnings: talks of past childhood abuse and a lot of heavy angst

"Happy birthday to me," You whispered to yourself, your small voice barely audible over the hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. 

You sat alone at the table, a card propped up in front of you that had been given to you by a kind elderly lady who lived next door when you returned home from school. 

You jumped in fear as you heard the front door slam shut, feeling yourself tremble as his footsteps neared. 

"Make yourself useful, girl," Your father demanded through slurred speech, cutting the previous silence in the house, you know he'd clearly been down to the pub after work, "What is this?" He eyed the card on the table angrily. 

You trembled with a sense of fear as he picked up and read over the words briefly, "It's... It's a birthday card, Dad," You said as you watched him tear it in half without even thinking and dump it in the bin.

"Birthday card?" Your fathers' voice sneered in disgust, "You don't deserve one of them, you're nothing but a burden in my life!" His words were venomous and your heart sank even more. 

"But... But everyone has a birthday," Your voice was quiet, afraid of his next move, "I'm ten this year, remember?" You couldn’t help the excitement in your voice, you were a young and innocent girl.

"Oh, really?" Your dad wondered, turning to face you while his words seemed more calmer than usual, "Well then I'd better give you your birthday present then, birthday girl." 

You couldn't help but allow your eyes to light up but that was soon disregarded as the man raised his hand, the sound of his slap against your cheek echoing through the room. 

"There's your birthday present," Your dad sneered with pure venom in his voice, "Now make yourself fuckin' useful and grab me another beer!" With his words sharp and demanding, you scurried over to the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of beer to hand to him, "Good, at least you can do that. Now get the fuck out of my sight, brat!"

You wake up startled, gasping for breath while your heart pounded in your chest while drenched in a somewhat cold sweat. The remnants of the nightmare of your tenth birthday clung in your mind, so vivid that you remember it just like it was yesterday.

You were beaten that night by a man who you once called your father, it was a memorable birthday for all the wrong reasons.

It was also the birthday that you learnt to never ask to celebrate again.

It’s one of the reasons why you never like to celebrate your birthday, you dread the day completely and want nothing more than to hide away in your bedroom.

Leah and Jordan both found out about that the hard way, but that’s a story to tell another day.

“Stupid damn nightmares,” You mumble to yourself, exhaling a sigh as you take a quick glance at the time on your phone, the words lighting up in white as a faint reminder of the date that it was.

It was the anniversary of the day that your dad died, a whole year ago today.It should have been the day that brought you a sense of relief but you just felt even further lost instead.

Doubtful of being able to sleep again, you sit up in bed and make use of your time by scrolling through your phone until the sun starts to come up, or your favourite little buddy wakes up.

Only a few more hours to wait at least.

You didn’t want to sleep, more so you were afraid of the recurring nightmares that haunt you.

It always seems to be the same one, the stark reminder of your dad towering over you while you tremble in fear in the corner, you wish you could just block it all from your memory.

Oh, if only that was so easy to do so.

You never actually went to the man’s funeral, instead you sat curled up in a heap of blankets and watched your favourite movie with your favourite little buddy.

It was much better than sitting inside a church, surrounded by distant family members who would murmur how sorry they were for his loss.

You weren’t though, you were glad he was dead. You knew he couldn’t hurt you now, you were safe.

“So, we’ve got the day off today,” Leah starts the conversation as you sit in the kitchen the following morning, a bowl of cereal in front of you as you fight to stay awake, “I was thinking that we could go to the park, perhaps?”

You wish you could say you were paying more attention to the blonde but you’re tired and nothing is really going in your head right now.

You feel completely exhausted, the lack of sleep every single night is catching up on you now.

“Monkey! Monkey!” Buddy’s little hands grip onto your arm to try and get your attention, “Will you play with me?”She asks, sweetly.

You want to say yes, however you're just so tired that you want to do nothing more than go back to sleep, but even so you're afraid to do that because the nightmares that plague your memory.

Every single night, that same nightmare.

It’s haunting.

“Maybe a bit later, okay? I’m not… I’m not feeling great,” You admit to the 3 year old.

Of course you know she won’t understand why you feel so sad today, but you can’t cry in front of her. It’s not right.

“Why are you sad?” Buddy questions, confused.

You don’t answer her directly as you gently lift her up to sit her on your lap and show interest in her bear that she has in her hand as you just cuddle her.

“How about we take a trip to the park? It’s a nice day,” Leah repeats, “What do you girls think about that?” She asks.

“Park, Mummy!” Buddy squeals in agreement.

Leah smiles at her mini me’s excitement as she looks at you, “How do you feel about going to the park? It would be a good chance to take Tate for a walk as well,” She gestures to the puppy asleep in his new bed, “Earth to Monkey?” She waves her hand in your face to get your attention.

“Huh,” You jolt in surprise at the hand in front of your face, “What’re we talking about?”

“I was just saying it’s a nice day to go to the park,” Leah repeats her words as she sees your attention is elsewhere, “Monkey, are you okay? You look like you’re ready to fall asleep in your breakfast,” she notes.

“Oh uh yeah, I’m fine,” You stifle a yawn as you nod, “Guess I’m just a bit tired, Le,” You admit to the blonde, starting to pick at the skin around your nails.

Leah tilts her head to the side and frowns in concern, “You’re not sleeping, again?” She questions, knowingly as you bite your bottom lip, hesitant to speak while there's a presence of a 3 year old who doesn’t need to listen to this conversation, “Buddy? Sweetheart, why don’t you go and play with your toys in the living room?” She suggests.

“Okay,” Your favourite little buddy is so eager to agree as she carefully slides herself off your lap and toddles into the living room to allow you two to talk.

You’re grateful for that, you don’t want Buddy to hear about this stuff. She’s too innocent for it.

“What’s goin’ on Monkey?” The blonde questions, concerned as she moves to sit in the seat beside you, “You’re not sleeping?” She repeats.

“No, no, I mean… I try but I just keep on having this stupid recurring nightmare,” You admit quietly, trying to not make it a big deal, “I’m afraid to sleep,” 

“Oh, Monkey,” Leah murmurs in sadness as she leans forward and moves a stray piece of hair out of your face, “Why didn’t you tell me this before?” She wonders.

“Dunno,” You confess as you shrug your shoulders.

The blonde exhales a sigh as she smiles sympathetically, “You know I’m here for you, my girl,” She reassures you, “Do you remember when I made that promise all those years ago? I still mean every single word that I said to this day,”

You know that you can trust Leah, she’s safe.

When your dad died last year, you had already been living with Leah, and Jordan as well for quite some time, and the two of them knew everything that happened in the past.

You never had the intention to ever tell either one of them about it though, but they found out one day by accident and you just ended up coming clean.

You told them everything, the couple were people that you felt you could trust. Sure it took a bit to warm up to them at first in a new housing environment, but you had known both of them for years.

You did trust both of them to some extent.

Leah had an aura of calmness around her that you feel safe, it made you open up and tell her what happened.

Her words that he told you do still stick in your brain, even to do this day.

“Ha, I win. Again!” 15 year old you exclaimed, pointing your index finger at Jordan while the two of you were playing Fifa.

So far the score was one-sided, 7 - 1.

Jordan was losing the game terribly.

“What,” The woman groaned in annoyance, “Are you sure you’re not cheating, little one?” She questioned in disbelief about the score.

“Please, how can you cheat at this game?” You couldn’t help but giggle, “I win, fair and square. Sucks to be a loser!” You still wound the woman up.

“I’m not a loser– You’re definitely cheating!” Jordan was quick to fire back and playfully scowled at you from where she sat on the sofa.

“When you two are finished squabbling,” A heavily pregnant Leah appeared in the doorway of the living room with an amused look on her face, “Dinners’ ready.” She stated.

The blonde had your attention at the mention of food, “What’re we havin’?” You wondered.

It was a known fact that Leah couldn’t cook all that well, usually sticking to sticking frozen food in the oven at her convenience.

“You’ll find out when you come and sit down at the table, won’t you?” Leah told you playfully as she looked at the telly, “Really, Jord? Are you letting her win, willingly?” She joked.

“I am not, the little one is good,” Jordan mumbled in disagreement, placing her controller down on the coffee table in front, “Come on kid, let’s go and eat dinner,” She gestured for you to follow.

“But we’re in the middle of a game!” You couldn’t help but whine.

“And the game will still be here when you’re finished,” Leah remarked, laughing a little bit, “Go on and pause it.” She added.

“Fine, alright,” You huffed in the way that a teenager does, before you begrudgingly walked into the kitchen to sit and eat dinner with the two older women, “But I want to play another game afterwards!”

“Don’t worry, Monkey. As soon as you’ve eaten, you can go back and continue to beat Jordan in Fifa,” Leah said, teasing her partner lightly as she ruffled your hair.

The way that you had opened up to them since you started living with them still amazed Leah. The once shy girl that would hide in her room and keep to herself, now so outspoken. She was glad to see you regularly behaving like a regular kid.

Not only were you shy, but in the first few months they would note the way that you would fight to not flinch when somebody came near you. Always afraid that people would treat you the same way that your father had done.

They didn’t understand why, but they knew they had to be patient. The two of them had always suspected things, but nothing was ever confirmed by you. 

You didn’t want to tell them, and they didn’t want to ask.

The constant voice in the back of your mind that everything you did was wrong, was what caused you to freak out the first time you dropped a plate by accident.

You offered to help Jordan dry the dishes up after dinner one evening, when she handed it to you, it had been slippery from the soap and it dropped out of your hands without a chance to even attempt to catch it.

The plate crashed onto the floor with a loud bang and broke into many pieces, you had stood there frozen, afraid of what would happen next.

“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I will clean it up, I will replace the plate. I am really sorry,” Your hands moved as an instinct to shield your face over your hands when Jordan approached you, “Please don’t hit me,” You pleaded, terrified.

“Hey, it’s alright kid,” Jordan moved to try and rest her hand on your shoulder as you jolted in fear, “It’s just a plate, it can be replaced. There’s no need to be frightened.”

The words weren’t sinking in as you were too wrapped up in your own head to hear what the woman was saying. You felt completely scared.

“What’s going on?” Leah questioned in concern as she walked into the kitchen after she heard the commotion and took in the scene in front of her.

Jordan looked at her with a panicked expression, “She’s scared, Le– I don’t… I don’t know what happened, I tried to reassure her but she’s scared of me Le,” She explained quickly as Leah moved slowly to stand in front of you, “No, Le, don’t. She’s terrified,”

Much to Jordan’s surprise though, when Leah stood in front of you and knelt down to your own height the best she could, you were broken out of the trance that you were in.

“Monkey?” The gentleness in the blonde’s voice got your attention, her eyes were soft in comparison to the harsh and cold eyes your dad often had, “Hey, there you are, cheeky monkey. I thought I’d lost you,” She said, sticking with the gentle approach.

“I’m sorry that I broke the plate,” You murmur the apology to the blonde, “Please don’t be mad,”

“It’s alright my girl, it’s just a plate and they always be replaced,” Leah continued to reassure you, keeping in mind that you felt frightened so she was cautious about things, avoiding enveloping you in a hug and instead just offering her hand out for you to take, “How about we leave Jordan to finish the rest of the washing up and we go and watch a movie, hm?” She suggested.

“But… But the plate is broken, I need to sweep it up,” You told her, looking down at the plate on the floor that is smashed to pieces.

The blonde shakes her head in disagreement, “That doesn’t matter now, okay? We can worry about that later. Let’s just go and watch a movie for now,” She told you gently, keeping her hand held out for you to take, “I’m sure there’s another Marvel film that I haven’t seen yet, isn’t there?”

You felt somewhat calm about the fact that Leah recognised you felt scared and offered comfort, but on your own terms, “Okay,” You agreed, accepting the hand that she held out for you to take, “You haven’t watched Iron Man yet, he’s so cool with the suits he built. I’d love to have one of them to just blast people when I want to do so!”

“What’re we watching then?” Jordan came to join you after she finished the rest of the dishes, weary about your initial fear towards her when you dropped the plate, “Did I miss anything good?” She asks.

“Jordy, you gotta see this!” You insisted, pointing your index finger in the direction of the TV, “Le, rewind it back– Look how cool Iron Man is with his suit, I want his powers! He just goes round blasting things like that!” You started to ramble all about Iron Man and the older woman felt a bit more relaxed, glad to see you weren’t frightened of her.

That was the start of you opening up more, Leah learnt that them by the two of them being patient it did pay off in the end, both Leah and Jordan had to find a newfound interest in the things that you loved but it all worked in the end, and Leah found herself knowing a lot more about these beloved Marvel characters in the long-run.

Anything to make you happy and safe in your new home.

However, you never did tell them the whole truth about your past there and then, you didn’t want them to think any differently of you.

It was easy to fake a cheerful smile and nobody even thought to ask questions now, the memories of your past were just that, memories.

Until that night at dinner where things came to light again.

“I’m gonna make a drink,” You were thirsty and completely forgot about it before sitting down to eat dinner with them both, so you moved from your seat at the table to make it.

“Can you reach or do you need a hand?” Leah teased lightly, poking fun at the fact you were still short.

Sticking your tongue out at her playfully, you walked over to where the glasses were kept, “I can reach, I’m taller than Jordy!” You insisted.

“Wha… Hey!” Jordan playfully scowled at you from where she sat eating her own dinner.

“Be careful,” Leah's maternal instinct kicked in as she watched apprehensively in case you slipped when reaching up high for the glass.

“I can do it,” You continued to insist, standing on your tiptoes with complete concentration on your face to reach one of them, “I’m short, but I’m still capable!”

“Okay shorty I believe you,” Leah joked while still keeping her eyes focused on you as she watched you reach for it, her playfulness in her voice disappearing when she saw your hoodie rise up slightly to show her the jagged scars that littered your back as her eyes widened in horror, “Oh my God,” She murmured quietly.

Jordan had caught onto Leah’s expression and was just as shocked to see it.

“I told you I got the glass Le, there’s no need to be protective,” You couldn’t help but giggle as you successfully reached for the glass and stood back to look at them, noting the concern that they both had, “Wha… I didn’t fall, why’d you both look so horrified?” You continued to wonder, not realising they had seen your scars.

“Monkey,” Leah began to say quietly and fearfully, “Those… Those scars on your back, how did you get them?” She wondered, apprehensively.

“Oh,” You tugged at your jumper automatically to try and hide them making another appearance, “There nothing, it’s just… it’s old stuff,” You told them, quietly.

“Old stuff?” Jordan repeated your words, concern written all over her face.

“Yeah, none of it matters. It’s… It’s the past,” Your not so keen to talk about this topic, trying to push down any memories from resurfacing as you make a drink in hopes that they will drop the subject.

They don’t, unfortunately.

Sitting back at the table with the two of them, you tried to ignore their weary glances as you gulped down your drink of squash, “Can we… Can we not make this out to be such a big deal? Please?” You asked them quietly.

“We need to talk about this Monkey,” Leah told you, gently as she tried to reach out and hold your hand, “Sweetheart, what… where did you get those from?” She asked, rephrasing the question to try and figure out the best approach to get you to open up to them.

“It’s nothing,” You were quick to tell them, “It wasn’t anything that I didn’t deserve,” You added.

Leah continued to look at you in concern as her eyebrows pinched together, “Sweetheart, no, nobody deserves anything like that,” She paused briefly, “Monkey, did somebody hurt you?” She questioned.

“No… Nobody, I fell. Nobody did this!” You continued to insist, but your quick response just made them even more concerned.

“Monkey, these scars don’t look like something that you can get from falling,” Jordan stated, honestly as her eyebrows furrowed, “Where did you get them, kid?” She knew she had to be gentle with her approach, the last that either of them wanted was you to revert back to the afraid girl you once was.

Glancing at Leah, you could tell that she was close to tears although you weren’t sure if it was finding out about this or the hormones, but she was close to crying for sure, “Sweetheart, please, I know you’re scared to tell us, but please, if someones’ hurt you then we need to know so we can protect you!” She insisted, her voice sounding hoarse.

“It… It was my dad,” You admitted to them, “He used to get angry sometimes, but it’s not his fault!” Even though he hurt you, you would still defend him.

It was your own fault what happened to you.

“Your Dad?” Jordan swallowed the lump in her throat at the truth, the two of them always had their suspicions it had something to do with the man, but hearing it aloud left the woman with a bitter taste in her mouth.

“Your… Your dad did this to you?” Leah’s own voice is hitched as the tears she’d been trying to keep at bay were let loose.

“Don’t cry, Le,” You told her, quietly as you moved to roll up your sleeve to show a faint scar from a cigarette burn on your arm from a night where your dad decided to use your arm as an ashtray, “They don’t hurt anymore, see?” You stated, pressing your cool finger against the scar.

Right there in that moment, Leah wanted to pull you into her arms, hold you so tightly and never let go, “Sweetheart,” She murmured, trying to fight against the instinct that she felt in case she spooked you.

“They’re just scars now, nothing else,” You told them, innocently, “It’s not his fault, I’m the one to blame. I was a burden to him,” You admitted.

“No, Monkey, no, you’re not a burden– Screw it,” Leah couldn’t fight against the instinct anymore as she moved off her chair in slow motion due to the fact she was heavily pregnant as she enveloped you in a hug, “You’re not– Listen to me, okay? Your dad… What he did, there’s no excuse for that, none at all. Nothing that happened is your fault, my girl.”

“I made him mad,” You mumbled, now trying to fight back your own tears, “I… I didn’t ever mean to make him so mad though, I did deserve it!”

“You didn’t kid,” Jordan chimed in, feeling a sense of anger for the man.

“No, no, you didn’t, you didn’t deserve any of that at all!” The blonde repeated her words, holding you in her arms the best she could with a swollen belly in the way, “What your dad did, none of it is okay. You were… You are just a kid, don’t think for a single second that any of what that man did to you is your fault,” She stated.

“It’s not?” You asked, confused.

You had always been told it was your fault, it was embedded in your brain that it was.

“No it’s not, my girl,” Leah told you truthfully.

“Oh,” You didn’t know what to say, you were used to being told so differently, so you just did what you think is right and rested your head on her shoulder, staring out at the layout of the kitchen behind you.

“It’s not your fault kid,” Jordan spoke up as she tried to control her own anger she felt for the man, “That man deserves to rot in prison for what he did to you,” Jordan stated, firmly as her hands clenched in anger.

“Jord, no,” Leah whispered as she caught sight of her partner's anger and shook her head to motion that it wasn’t the right time for that, “Monkey is our priority right now. We’ll talk about it another time,” She insisted, firmly.

“You’re right,” Jordan exhaled a sigh and started to be calmer than she was, right now the main priority was on you and making sure that you’re okay, “You don’t need to be scared now, kid. We’ve got you,” She promised, getting up from her seat to rest her hand on your back.

“Jord’s right, Monkey,” Leah told you as she continued to hold you in her arms, “We’ve got you, you’re safe and we… I won’t ever let anybody hurt you again, alright?”

“You… You won’t?” You peered your head up from her shoulder and looked at her cautiously.

“I won’t,” The blonde repeated firmly, “I’m always going to be here to protect you, you don’t need to be scared because I’m here. I’ve got you, my girl.” She told you.

Leah really did keep word, they both did.

The two of them have been there for you a whole lot through the time that you moved in with them 4 years ago just months before your 16th birthday and that hasn’t changed still to this day.

“Do you remember what I told you?” Leah questions, bringing you out of your thoughts that are wrapped up in.

“I do remember,” You tell the blonde quietly in agreement, “It’s just… You were on holiday, I didn’t want to ruin it by you having to worry about me,” 

“You’re my kid, it’s my job to worry about you,” Leah replies without even thinking about it, “And before you say anything else, I wouldn’t have cared if you had ruined it. You need me then I’m here, that’s the way it has been and always will be,”

You feel a warmth spread through your chest at her words, a sense of security in your life that the blonde provided time and time again, “I know,” You whisper, a faint smile forming on your lips, “Thank you, I will… I will tell you next time that something is on my mind,” You tell her.

“How long have you not been able to sleep for?” Leah asks, concerned where it should be something that needs to be looked into with your profession in mind.

“A few weeks, I… I just can’t sleep, I try to and then it’s like the same dumb nightmare again,” You mumble, slumping your shoulders, “So then I wake up in a cold sweat and I can’t go back to sleep again,” You add.

“Well I guess that explains why you’ve been falling asleep in random places,” Leah jokes, trying to keep the conversation light despite knowing your true struggle with sleep coming to light, “Does this have something to do with today’s date?” She asks, quietly.

“You remembered,” You look up at her in shock, “I think it might, I keep dreaming about my dad and the day of my tenth birthday.” You admit to her.

“Of course I remembered, I thought that today might be tough for you,” Leah sympathises with you and understands how hard today might be, “We don’t have to go out today, we can stay in… How about we watch a Marvel movie? There’s gotta be one that I haven’t seen yet, huh?” She asks, offering her hand out for you to take.

You can’t help but grin faintly as you remember the memory all those years back, “That’s what you said before,” Pausing, you accept the hand offered out to you and stand up from the chair, “We can watch Black Widow, I love that one!” You declare, not giving her much choice before you drag her into the living room after abandoning your breakfast.

Watching any sort of Marvel movie was definitely worth it in your own opinion.

“Monkey!” Your favourite little buddy cheers as you both walk into the room, “Can you play with me now?” She asks, sweetly.

“How about you come join us on the sofa instead to watch this movie?” You offer, while making yourself comfy on the sofa and tap the space for the 3 year old, who jumps up from the floor and joins you on there with no hesitation.

“What are we watching?” Buddy asks, peering up to look at you curiously.

“Only one of the best Marvel movies ever!” You exclaim, beaming a wide smile.

“That’s what you say about anything Marvel that you watch,” Leah smirks, looking up from her phone with a knowing smirk before she leans over and ruffles your hair.

Unaware to you, Leah is in the middle of texting Jordan to fill her in on what is going on and much to her relief, Jordan just so happens to be in the area and tells her that’s 5 minutes out from their place with snacks in hand.

You don’t even hear the front door open when she enters because you’re so engrossed in the beginning of the film, “This film is just after Civil War, which you haven’t watched yet but there is still time!” You tell your favourite little buddy, of course she doesn’t have a clue what you’re on about though.

“Room for one more?” The familiar accent pulls your attention away from the opening credits as she stands there with a shopping bag full of snacks, “What Marvel movie are we watching this time?” She wonders, plonking herself down on the other side of the sofa where there’s an empty space for her beside you.

You don’t even know the words to express your gratitude right now as you put your arms around her to hug her, “Did you bring sweets?” You ask, cheekily.

“Like that’s even a question,” Jordan remarks playfully, “Of course I did, so many of them!” She adds.

“Well that’s not healthy,” Leah chimes in, rolling her eyes all but used to her ex’s ways, “You’re not eating all of them,” She says, pointing her index finger at you.

“Oh come on, where’s the fun in that,” You grin cheekily and accept a packet of sweets you’re offered, “See, this is why Dobby’s the fun parent and you’re the stern one, Malfoy,” You joke with her.

Jordan faux’s a gasp, “I want to be offended that you called me that, but you said I was fun so I’m gonna let it slide,” She states.

“See? Fun,” You grin, looking between the two women.

Leah rolls her eyes and clicks her tongue, “Alright, alright. Let’s watch the movie,” She tells you, gesturing your attention back to the first scene in it.

“Whatever you say,” You nod in agreement, making yourself comfy from your spot on the sofa in the middle of both Leah and Jordan, head resting on Leah’s lap while your legs dangled over Jordan and of course Buddy has managed to slot herself to lie down in front of you with your arm protectively over her.

Your favourite little Buddy continues to watch the movie in awe, despite some of the more… graphic scenes that there are, “Wow,” she gasps quietly and continues to watch the movie.

“This is Black Widow, she’s cool, we like the Black Widow!” You tell the little one who’s all but glued to your side, “I’m gonna show you all the marvel films. There’s so many, you’re gonna love ‘em, Buddy!” You insist, smiling at her.

You were grateful to be surrounded by Leah and Jordan at that minute, what should have been a dreaded day has now been overshadowed with their ever growing support to get through it not on your own.

You couldn't have more gratitude for your newfound family.

© scribblesofagoonerr

[willkimurashat]

Rant? (potential spoilers?)

Alright, don't hate me for this, but I actually feel bad for Amelia. Firstly, no one's interested in her romantically (story of my life, and let me tell you, that really does your head in sometimes). Secondly, she's been put in the middle of drama multiple times now, for the sake of drama and/or for shaking her already somewhat shady/unsteady relationship with her twin. Thirdly, the guy that is supposedly head over heels with mc (in my game it was Roberto) goes on to kiss Amelia and then she has to act like nothing happened because she doesn't want to cause more drama for her sister, plus, he still acts all pouty around mc and looks disappointed when she doesn't pick him at the recoupling. Who's to say that Zeph didn't actually pine for Amelia the whole time he's been in a relationship with mc, and Amelia just had to watch that with pain all these years?? And now she has to see everyone in the villa swoon over mc, while she is, again, left in the shadow. I meannn, if I were Amelia, I'd probably cry all day or walk, ngl. So no, I don't want to be her enemy, we're siblings and I want us to be on the same team - I don't want any discourse between us, I just want to forget the past and for her to be happy in a couple with someone who genuinely cares for her.

[phoenixcatch7]

I know 'person with secret to hide spots other person with secret to hide but doesn't say anything' is like. Thee trope in superhero crossovers, but come on! Some of these guys have been doing this for decades! There's tons of heroes that have gone to pretty extreme lengths to be Completely Imperceptible in civilian life.

Don't you think it's scarier, after all is said and done, to sit there and think I didn't notice a thing? I wouldn't have ever realised? I would never have known? To know that someone you were familiar with - close with, even! - had this whole other personality and skillset and powers and experiences and life just behind the curtain, and they hid it so completely you didn't even see it was there.

'I always knew there was something off' what if you didn't. How world shaking would it be to be so utterly blindsided? To know that this person had somehow learned to so deceptive?

[dewitty1]

Double Trouble

multiverse_of_fanfic

@multiverse_of_fanfic

Chapters: 9/9 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Characters: Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, Gawain Robards, Pansy Parkinson, Ron Weasley, George Weasley, Original Characters Additional Tags: Auror Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Case Fic, Espionage, Mystery, Post-War, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Draco Malfoy in the Muggle World, Hurt/Comfort, Ministry of Magic (Harry Potter), Snarky Draco Malfoy, Oblivious Harry Potter, Oblivious Draco Malfoy, Mutual Pining, Romance, Falling In Love, Denial of Feelings, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Resolved Sexual Tension, Kissing, Smut, Anal Sex, Torture via Incarcerous (not graphic/extreme), Clubbing, LCDrarry 2023, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE

Summary:

Four years after the War, Draco is stuck in a dead-end job, paper-pushing his life away. Until one day, after a security breach in the Ministry, he receives an offer he can’t refuse. Thrown back into a world he thought he’d left behind, Draco must wrestle with his Death Eater past as well as his inconvenient — and forbidden — feelings for an annoyingly level-headed Harry Potter.

Will he manage to come out unscathed like he has most of his life, or will it all come crashing down?

(੭ˊ͈ ꒵ˋ͈)੭*⁺˚. * ･ ｡ﾟ☆

Excerpt:

“Just so you know,” Draco said nonchalantly. “What you did tonight was very, very hot.”

Harry turned toward him fully, the heat in his eyes burning instantly, like they had never left the club. “Come back to mine?”

“God yes.”

They were in Harry’s bedroom before Draco finished speaking. A fireplace flared to life behind them when they touched down, the crackling of the embers and their heavy breathing the only sounds in the room.

Harry leaned in close, the orange and red shadows of the fire dancing off his face. “You’re sure you want this?”

There was a fine line between love and hate. For most of their lives, Draco and Harry had been teetering on the line between, too blinded by prejudice and a War to see just how closely they wobbled between one and the other. For as long as Draco could remember, it had always been Harry. Before he knew him, he wanted to be Harry Potter’s best friend. Then they met, and he wanted nothing more than to make Harry pay for rejecting him.

There was so much baggage between them, emotional trauma – physical trauma too, on Draco’s end – and ledgers and ledgers of insults and fights. But somewhere between an escape in a burning Room and a misunderstood office reunion, the line had blurred, until it had evaporated altogether, leaving behind what Draco knew was always there.

“Yes,” Draco breathed. “I’m sure.”

Harry’s green gaze flickered between Draco’s lips and eyes, a ring of fire around his dilated pupils. The distance between them closed until there was none left and it was only lips against lips. It felt like nothing and everything Draco had expected, all at the same time. Their lips were both chapped and a bit raw, but they fit together perfectly.

Draco moaned softly, licking the seam of Harry’s lips, the sound intensifying when Harry let Draco in. The sweet, gentle back and forth of lips devolved into something more feral almost at once. Harry’s tongue brushed up against his own, and he groaned roughly as Draco nipped at it lightly.

Frantic hands moved up and down Draco’s back, in and out of his hair, down down until they rested on his waist, rubbing soothing circles into the canvas of exposed skin. Draco’s hands skated over Harry’s chest, then his shoulders, one snaking into his hair, fisting a clump of it to keep him close, the other clumsily attempting to unbutton Harry’s shirt.

Both of Harry’s hands moved behind Draco, taking hold of both globes of Draco’s arse, squeezing them to the brink of pain. Harry broke the kiss, panting, “You’ve got the most perfect arse in the world, d’you know that?

Draco rested his cheek against Harry’s. “I’ve heard it said once or twice,” he teased.

(°◡°♡).:｡

[saotomexmary]

"shut up."

this is based off a scene from my fic! 🫶 (link here!)